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unibrowzz · 4 years ago

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Mod (finally) reviews all 67 winners of the Eurovision Song Contest Part IV: The 1980s

Ah yes, the 80s. One of my favourite decades for music overall, and one of the only decades in Eurovision where I wouldn’t immediately jump at the chance to change most of the songs that won, the other decade being the 2000s.

But at least with the 80s there was more quality songs per year, whereas the 2000s was mostly drivel.

I also count the 80s as being somewhat of a turning point in the contest’s history, and by that I mean it always seemed to me like it was the decade where the UK really began to stop caring. Most people know the song that won in 1985, but nobody knows what won in 1986. Everyone knows Johnny Logan won twice, but couldn’t name his second song. Everyone knows Celine Dion competed, but can’t remember if she won or what she sang.

That and countries also started experimenting with more modern sounds and outfits towards the end. The early 80s is just an extension of the 70s I swear.

But that’s enough of all that, how do I find the winning songs?

1980- What’s Another Year?

Country: Ireland

Artist: Johnny Logan

Language: English

Thoughts: Ah yes, the song that makes every 50something woman in the UK and Ireland all doey-eyed and rosy cheeked as they remember back to when they were a teenager watching this on TV and drooling at the lovely looking sad Irishman singing his sorrows into the microphone. Or that’s my experience with this song anyway. Another experience is that most vintage fans I know tend to dislike this song on the grounds of it beating out [insert song here] Everyone has their favourite from 1980 since it was honestly a pretty strong year, but even though this song isn’t my first place for that year I can still clearly see why it won. See, 1980 had a lot of pop songs, so a slow, sad song like this one was bound to stand out, whether it was popular or not. Luckily for this one, it turned out to be a popular choice. Other songs wouldn’t be so lucky… Back on track though. Like I said, this is a very sad and melancholy song with sad and melancholy lyrics, which not only made it stand out in its year, but also made it stand out amongst other Eurovision songs of its time. It’s strange to think, but at this point in the contest’s history there hadn’t been a winner with lyrics so solemn and personal. See, in modern Eurovision, every other song is the artist baring their soul about their horrible ex-boyfriend, or their depression, or past abuse, or whatever, so knowing there was a period where songs like that were so rare is just… surreal to me.

Is this my personal winner for this year? This or Greece tbh, I don’t mind this one

If no, what is? Greece- Anna Vissi- “Autostop”

Personal ranking (out of 67): 23rd

1981: Making Your Mind Up

Country: United Kingdom

Artist: Bucks Fizz

Language: English

Thoughts: Ah yes, the UK winner that nobody really likes, but the BBC still forces at us anyway because they’re proud they came up with a gimmick that everybody remembers. Or maybe it’s not that well remembered, but nobody would know that because we’re reminded of it every year. This song is… alright. Just alright. The first listen of this one is always the best, because after a while it just gets kind of annoying. The singing ESPECIALLY starts to grate you for a while. Even in the studio version the two girls sound unbearably shrill and whiny, and I’m not sure if that’s their fault or the songwriter’s (since if I remember correctly only one of them was a professional singer). I’m seriously convinced there’s no way for a female vocalist to pull this off without sounding terrible. Again, this one’s perfectly fine and serviceable, but that doesn’t mask the fact it’s still the worst UK winner and the worst winner of the 1980s too.

Is this my personal winner for this year? No

If no, what is? Portugal- Carlos Paião- “Playback”

Personal ranking (out of 67): 58th

1982: Ein Bißchen Frieden

Country: West Germany

Artist: Nicole

Language: German (Translation: “A little peace”)

Thoughts: This song gives me a really warm, nostalgic feeling, and I don’t know why. I mean, I know this one did well internationally, so it’s possible I just heard it as a kid, but given how I grew up in the early 2000s, “Eurovision is a shitty freak show full of weirdos from the USSR who gang up on the UK and don't vote for us on purpose” era Britain, that’s highly unlikely. Anyways, this is such a warm, fuzzy kind of song. It has a lovely… round-the-campfire, singalong kind of vibe, like this is meant to be sung by a load of long haired hippies with flowers in their hair and CND symbols drawn on their cheeks. And it’s… … Also kind of bland. If you’ve been reading my personal winners so far, you’ll have noticed I definitely have a soft spot for old German entries, so it’s a shame I find the one song they actually won with to be so… generic. It’s like they got tired of being unique so decided to send the same saccharine fluff everyone else was sending, and guess what, it paid off majorly, because this song was a huge hit at the time. Something about that kind of bothers me, like, out of all the entries they sent, it’s the one that’s the most “Eurovision-y” that ended up winning. And there’s something depressing in that.

Is this my personal winner for this year? No

If no, what is? United Kingdom- Bardo- “One Step Further”

Personal ranking (out of 67): 50th

1983: Si la vie est Cadeau

Country: Luxembourg

Artist: Corinne Hermés

Language: French (Translation: “If life were a gift”)

Thoughts: You want a tip on how to stand out amongst Eurovision fans? Say you like this song. Probably won’t make you very popular, but you’ll stand out at least. I will confess, I, too, was part of the hate-wagon for this song. Like most fans I knew, I’d complain about how boring and uninteresting it was and how it, ahem, “robbed” so many other entries, and how basic it was, et cetera, et cetera. But… honestly? It’s not even that bad. Sure I had other favourites from 1983 (the ones I could stand watching anyway, the host that year was so unimaginably terrible I gave up watching halfway through. I DARE you to watch the whole thing without wanting to neck yourself), but this song gets way more hate than it deserves. I honestly don’t think this song is half as bad as I made it out to be myself, or as bad as the fandom makes it out to be. It’s got a decent melody, some solid vocals, some appealingly 80s instrumental, like there’s a lot I like here. …Until you read the lyrics and realise they’re almost as half-assed and lazy as All Kinds of Everything’s, but I digress. Did I prefer other songs from that year? Of course. Am I going to complain about this one winning? Nah. It’s alright.

Is this my personal winner for this year? No

If no, what is? Sweden- Carola Häggkvist- “Främling”

Personal ranking (out of 67): 41st

1984- Diggiloo, Diggiley

Country: Sweden

Artist: Herreys

Language: Swedish

Thoughts: Whenever I was a younger fan I used to describe this song as being drunk-dad-at-a-wedding-music performed by three sentient Ken dolls, and I still stand by that statement. And I don’t really know how else to describe this one. It certainly has its charm, and it’s still a likeable song, but it also feels very… vapid. Like if this song were a person, they’d be a bit of a bimbo. And I mean, the song’s about how the singer’s oh-so-happy and prancing down the street in his brand new shoes, so that’s probably a fair description. Part of me wonders if that’s down to old Eurovision songs being vapid in general or if it’s down to the schlager genre itself requiring songs to be kinda neutered and happy-go-lucky, but even though I do like this song, it does come off as being a bit bland. A bit by-the-numbers and playing-it-safe. And I don’t mind songs like that, but I’d rather they didn’t win, y’know?

Is this my personal winner for this year? Not really

If no, what is? Italy- Alice & Franco- “Il Treni di Tozeur”

Personal ranking (out of 67): 15th

1985- La det Swinge

Country: Norway

Artist: Bobbysocks

Language: Norwegian

Thoughts: Ah yes, the song which finally hauled Norway into first place after years of being a regular last-placer. Maybe the UK should take some notes instead of blaming Brexit. Or Russia. Or Iraq. Or anything other than their own apathy, for that matter. But this is about La det Swinge and not the UK, so what are my thoughts on it? Well it’s… It’s the kind of song I imagine my mom and aunt would sing at a wedding if they ever attended one. It’s a very fun song, a little cheesy, sure, but it’s hard to not like a song that’s this upbeat and cheery. And yeah I know it’s because it’s schlager and that’s generally a really cheerful genre by default, I touched on that in the review above,

Is this my personal winner for this year? This or Israel

If no, what is? Israel- Yizhar Cohen- “Olé Olé”

Personal ranking (out of 67): 14th

1986- J’aime la Vie

Country: Belgium

Artist: Sandra Kim

Language: French

Thoughts: This song is an enigma because I’m an absolute slut for 80s pop, yet, for some reason, I find this song painfully average and uninteresting. Now, I’ll get it off my chest and say that 1986 was also a painfully average and uninteresting year, and most of the time I just felt myself remembering the singer more than the song, and even then I struggle to remember what some of the acts even were. It was just such a boring blur of a year I’m surprised the juries even managed to stay awake to pick a winner. And I GUESS you could argue that this song is so upbeat and peppy that it woke them up, but that doesn’t excuse how bloody generic it is. Like, this is the most generic 80s song you can imagine, and not in a good way. It feels more like stock music than an actual publicly released pop song. Had it not won, I doubt it would’ve stood out to me at all; it would’ve just faded into the background with all the other muted, 80s-coloured mush from this year. Basically, there’s a reason the singer’s age is the only thing noteworthy about this song.

Is this my personal winner for this year? Not really

If no, what is? Luxembourg- Sherisse Laurence- “L’amour de ma vie”

Personal ranking (out of 67): 49th

1987- Hold me Now

Country: Ireland

Artist: Johnny Logan

Language: English

Thoughts: Ah yes, the superior Johnny Logan winner. And I’m not sure why everyone forgets this one because Mother of Mercy this song is in another league entirely compared to the other schlock Ireland’s won with. Like this is their best winner, no competition. One of their best songs overall as well. One of the best entries from the 80s, one of the best winners of the 80s, one of the best winners… Yeah, I really like this song. I’ll admit to sleeping on this one for too long myself, always dismissing it as some boring Irish ballad to go with all the other boring Irish ballads they somehow managed to win with (we’ll get to that later), and always agreeing with people who said XYZ country (always Yugolslavia) should have won instead. Basically I learnt the hard way to never judge a song on its country and genre. But one day I found myself in the midst of a revisiting trip, going back to winners I didn't pay much attention to, just to see if there was anything I’d missed the first time round. And something about the lyrics in this song resonated with me a lot more than I thought they would. In a strange way, it made me feel older; like I’d grown up and was able to relate to the words in a song and appreciate it more than I could when I was younger. The line “what do you say when words are not enough?” especially hits harder than it should; as someone with autism I tend to find showing emotions difficult, even in virtual conversation where I’m not using my voice or face, because… Well, what do you say when your words aren’t enough?

Is this my personal winner for this year? Yes

If no, what is? N/A

Personal ranking (out of 67): 2nd

1988- Ne Partez pas Sans Moi

Country: Switzerland

Artist: Céline Dion

Language: French

Thoughts: Telling people Céline Dion won this thing is a new favourite hobby of mine, just to see the confused reaction. And that’s the most interesting thing about this song because it’s… fine, I guess? It’s a perfectly serviceable 80s power ballad, but there’s no bells and whistles to make me sit up and declare it any better than just “okay”. It’s basically the ballad equivalent of J’aime la Vie from 1986, in that it’s extremely 80s and also in French, but there’s nothing to make it that memorable aside from the singer herself. And even then this isn’t the song that made her famous anyway. Even her singing doesn't make this one stand out, partially because the song doesn't do anything special with it, and partially because she just blends in with all the other good singers of this era. And that’s kinda sad to think about.

Is this my personal winner for this year? Hmmm....

If no, what is? Greece- Afroditi Frida- “Clown”

Personal ranking (out of 67): 22nd

1989- Rock Me

Country: Yugoslavia

Artist: Riva

Language: Croatian

Thoughts: So this is another song it really took me a while to get into (there’s lots of those, trust me) and one that was very briefly in my top three overall favourites. It’s slid down a few slots since then, though I would still say it’s… Somewhere in the top 15. I don’t really have a lot to say about this one, if I’m honest. It’s just a good, fun, solid song which stood out in a very dull and ballad-saturated year, nothing more, nothing less. The lyrics are nice too, being about a bored musician who learns to love music again by teaching himself how to play pop songs to entertain his friends. That’s a unique subject and I can imagine it resonating with a lot of people who’ve fallen out with a hobby they used to love because they took it too seriously (providing they either speak Croatian or have looked up the lyrics, of course). I mean, it resonates with me at least. All in all, I just like this song for its message more than anything else.

Is this my personal winner for this year? No

If no, what is? Portugal- Da Vinci- “Conquistador”

Personal ranking (out of 67): 9th

#Eurovision #mod's winner reviews #posting now because the tag will be CHAOS come 7 lmao #esc winners

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aod4909 · 7 years ago

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One through thirty (if you can) for the "Hi, I'm not from the US" ask set :D ♥

Wow let me make some tea first*makes tea and sips it dramatically*here we go!damn, this took a while to write… mostly because I spent 2hours laughing at anecdotes but…

I HOPE YOU ARE PREPARED!

1. favourite place in your country? I’m honestly incapable of picking.

2. do you prefer spending your holidays in your country or travel abroad? HOLIDAYS ARE TO BE SPEND WITH FAMILY, GO TO CHURCH AND EAT YOU LITTLE SHIT! xD But what about summe-ORTHODOX CHURCH HAS THAT COVERED TOO

3. does your country have access to sea?

4. favourite dish specific for your country? most would go with souvlaki and gyros but I’ll go with most things they serve in fish taverns x)

5. favourite song in your native language? I don’t listen to Greek music like at all :| a shame really cause we have a lot of amazing musicians. I’ll go with Κάγκελα Παντού by Πανούσης (who passed recently, may he raise hell wherever he is ♥) It’s that one song that most people know. Back on September at art exams we were hanging in the cafeteria and my friend started singing it and the entire place joined him x) or those who were over 25 and their parents’ was listening to it cause it’s old af…

6. most hated song in your native language? the majority of them? XDDDD Idk I really fucking hate everything that’s popular here… then again I pretty much hate what’s popular everywhere but whatever x)

7. three words from your native language that you like the most? ντιβανοκασέλα ειμαρμένη ταλανίζω and all the new words we keep making every day like my own word for coat racks “καμπαρντινοκαπελιέρα”

8. do you get confused with other nationalities? if so, which ones and by whom? Idk what image you get when you think greek people but let me tell you we are diverse af… Like my friend is dark skinned with black hair, deep brown eyes and busy eyebrows (prob what you would imagine) but I’m white as milk with brown hair that turns reddish/yellowish in the sun and brown eyes, my grandma has blue\purple eyes (fuck my DNA) my cousin has green eyes and light brown hair (fuck my DNA στο τετράγωνο), my other friend is a redhead… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ What I usually hear from my people is that they were told that they don’t look “Greek enough”

9. which of your neighbouring countries would you like to visit most/know best? I’ve been to Bulgaria so far and I’d like to visit Constantinople some day. What? It’s called Istanbul these days? No, in Greece it.is.not.

10. most enjoyable swear word in your native language? You’ve heard about how spanish is amazing for swearing? Greek is too! (για να λέμε την αλήθεια σα το ελληνικό το μπινελίκι άλλο τίποτα, καθαρίζ’ η ψυχή ‘ς) And we swear a motherfucking lot… and we have great imagination too

11. favourite native writer/poet? I still feel school is too fresh and I kinda “hate” everything we studied and it’s a freaking shame… I’ll pick Ευγένιος Τριβιζάς who writes children’s books because I can still read them and enjoy them! And he made my childhood better!

12. what do you think about English translations of your favourite native prose/poem? I kinda believe that poetry can’t be translated…Like when I read Poe in greek it sounds silly to me even though the translation is pretty good… the words don’t have the same meaning, you know…But that could be just me… I mean I’m learning Polish so I can one day read the witcher books properly xD

13. does your country (or family) have any specific superstitions or traditions that might seem strange to outsiders?

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAA

We celebrate name days! birthdays too but name day is more important cause the church said so. (and if your parents dared give you a name that is not a name God himself would give you, and most importantly if it isn’t the name of your grandma or grandpa (even if they already have three grandchildren named after them) bitch think again we are gonna call you Maria now! or Eleni/Yannis/Giorgos.

If someone says something like “tomorrow your parents are gonna die what will you do?” you hit the wood to avoid jinx (often the person who says it hits the wood as they say it…)

Friday the 13th is a normal day to us! It’s Tuesday the 13th that is unlucky (cause that’s when Constantinople fell)

If in a conversation two people say the same word at the same time you gotta say “touch red” and you have to touch something red… idk why….

Talismans! to protect you from the evil eye, or bring good luck. They are usually a small eye shaped thing or crosses but it can be anything that has been blessed :P I know mothers who got pens from the church that were blessed so their kid would pass the exams T________T

Now if you do get the evil eye (like if someone was looking at you and talked/thought a lot about you (good or bad) and you get a headache you pretty much call your grandma for “ξεμάτιασμα”. It’s a ritual of shorts that you put water in a small cup and cross it repeatedly while you say a prayer and put drops of olive oil in it. And the oil will either stay in drops or dissolve in the water… the person who does the whole thing starts yawning during it and they then get the headache the other person had. My uncle calls my grandma EVERY.SIGNLE.DAY. Oh and you have to learn that prayer on a specific day. Only women can learn it and they have to write it down and give it to a man to give it to the woman that wants to learn it or some shit?!?!?!?

also grandmas tend to cross you and spit (they don’t actually spit they pretend …some do spit actually) on you so nothing bad will happen to you

We also tend to spit ourselves if someone speaks of misfortune…

Did you sneeze? Someone is talking about you :^) Ask someone to tell you 3 numbers put them together and count the alphabet. The letter is the first of the name of the person who’s talking about you.

Did someone come to your house and you want him gone? No problem get some salt and sprinkle it behind them!

Is that a priest? Kiss his hand! But wait! Is he on the street?? Σκόρδα! (garlic)

Actually, say σκόρδα!! whenever something bad is said and you’re good

Are your palms itchy? Great!!! You’ll get money!

Is your nose itchy? You’ll get beaten…

Is it christmas or easter? You gotta call ALL your relatives! yes and that ninth cousin you haven’t seen since you were 5. Btw Easter is the most important holiday of the year and we celebrate it on a different day than the rest of the world cause fuck you we know better XD (idk what the actual reason is I’m not religious) oh and there’s a 40day fast before the easter binge!

There are SO MANY superstitions and traditions in this country it should be illegal!!! And everywhere you go they have more and more and more and jesus fucking christ Y____Y in villages they tend to get annoying pretty fast.

14. do you enjoy your country’s cinema and/or TV? I don’t watch tv or movies, but I know of two pretty good comedies atm.There used to be so many amazing shows that I will keep rewatching till I die!S1ngles gotta be my fave ♥ and it’s been 10 years since it ended ;__;

15. a saying, joke, or hermetic meme that only people from your country will get?that will be 90% of them? But here are some not so funny? I found…

16. which stereotype about your country you hate the most and which one you somewhat agree with?

I’ve heard that we are lazy.

Well let me tell you that my grandfather started working when he was 7years old. He was working every day, weekends too! All day and on holidays! And I’m talking hard work here, building houses. He also got mostly deaf from an accident at work and the bones on his right hand started to… idk what it is but it’s from too much work and he needs painkillers (He was never paid extra for that btw) Now he “retired” the government gives him enough money to pay bills, taxes and live for 15 days… he is 82 years old and he still works with no insurance now of course, so he can pay doctors and get through the rest of the month.My mum is a chemist. She leaves for work at 7:30 in the morning and comes back anywhere between 18:00 to 20:00 (depends how fucked up are the roads are today :^) sometimes she works on Saturdays, she is owed around 2k euros from her job and over a month in days-off and whenever she gets them they call her at home to ask her questions cause apparently nobody there knows how to do the job! Oh, she also does private math/physics/chemistry lessons to students after work so she can come home at 22:00 and then cook :^)My dad is officially unemployed (but still has to pay income taxes!!!! cause this is Greece! and shit like that make sense!) and he works with no insurance at my uncle’s store. He also often works on Saturdays.And my family is doing kinda “ok”

Then you have those fucks that sit on their chair all day long, playing Farmville and get overpaid for it, or they just steal it ;P In fact our government consist solely of such fucks!

Now guess who everyone sees and says “all greeks are like that!” I heard that we blame Germany or anyone else that isn’t us. I heard that we don’t value our money or shit.Well, there are a lot of people like that, here and everywhere. The problem is that stupid people are loud af… So you only get to hear them and their stupid opinions that they pulled out of their asses.

A small part of me was glad Trump was elected, cause now yall Americans know what it’s like :\

17. are you interested in your country’s history? yes and no? It’s been shoved down my throat so much that I need a long break before it gets interesting again… I’m mostly interested in ancient Greece. Byzantium is the most boring shit I’ve ever had the displeasure to study and more recent history… I could be interested but boy school made it that way that whenever I hear the name Ελευθέριος Βενιζέλος I want to throw up.Plus the whole thing “our ancestors made this and that and I today should get credit for” pisses me the fuck off

18. do you speak with a dialect of your native language? Sometimes, my mum is from the Serres(North) and if I go there I’m from Athens! but when I’m here and something slips they look at me funny like where are you from?

19. do you like your country’s flag and/or emblem? what about the national anthem? Our flag is ok I guess :P Our anthem is beautiful but I don’t like the tune… don’t tell anyone they’re gonna kill me, I lack patriotism tbh…at least compared to everyone here XD

20. which sport is The Sport in your country? Football I guess? In my house it’s basketball. sports and I never heard of each other…

21. if you could send two things from your country into space, what would they be? *cough* Τα γαμημένα σεμεδάκια της γιαγιάς που είναι πάνω στη τηλεόραση… και τη Βουλή. *cough*

22. what makes you proud about your country? what makes you ashamed?Our compassion makes me proud ♥ Like with the refuges- and when I say “we” I don’t mean the government. I mean the everyday people who barely get by themselves and will still share what little they have with those in need.

And then there isthose people. The stupid, lazy, racist, egotistical etc, pieces of shit… That tend to be all those things together at the same time

One thing that is certain in this forsaken country is that the good, hard working people, the innocent and those who follow the rules and respect everyone are those who will be cheated, taken advantage of, beaten to the ground, get punished and suffer. The heartless bastards will be given a praise and a raise.

23. which alcoholic beverage is the favoured one in your country? We have some good wine here ;) and Ouzo and my fave Tsipouro, cause it does the job and smells amazing.

24. what other nation is joked about most often in your country? Well…. everyone?? xD I’m sorry

25. would you like to come from another place, be born in another country? Sometimes… I love my country, I love the land itself, the people, our culture sometimes gets on my nerves… and it hurts me so unbelievably much how this it is treated… but it’s mine you know? Even if I often feel like I don’t really belong here… And even though I would love to live abroad I doubt I could… I would just miss us…και η πίτα της γιαγιάς με κούριερ δε λέει ρε

26. does your nationality get portrayed in Hollywood/American media? what do you think about the portrayal?

I don’t really watch many movies so I wouldn’t know what little they say about us… but like they usually get some shots of a club with people partying non-stop on an island and that is true… non-stop parties for tourists is how they stay alive :P

27. favourite national celebrity? Μαρία Σολωμού I love that woman and her hair ♥ and her voice and face and personality ;-; She’s been my celebrity crush since I was a kid

28. does your country have a lot of lakes, mountains, rivers? do you have favourites? a lot of all of the above and no I don’t have faves, I haven’t even seen half of them.

29. does your region/city have a beef with another place in your country? Look… if you find one place in the entire country that doesn’t have a beef with someone it’s probably in Crete and that’s because they killed them.

30. do you have people of different nationalities in your family?If by family you mean close relatives, no. But if you mean it the greek way… yes quite a few… but I don’t pay attentions when my grandma tells me the family news x)

THAT WAS LONG AF. AND TOOK ME HOURS but it was fun lol If you read it congratulations! If i made mistakes… fuck you I ain’t reading it again XD

#lilitalc #long post #text post #reply #about me #that's the longest shit i posted here

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