#and the comedic factor can only be increased by making ouyang a minimum wage worker thats not legally allowed to stab his boss

[dustteller]

Ok, so I've spent a lot of time wondering why modern AU Zhu and Ouyang would be friends, since the "we're alike" thread of fate would probably not be a thing in a modern setting where its way easier to find other queer people that DONT want you dead. In a modern AU Zhu would have Options, she wouldn't have to be stuck with Ouyang. Especially since mine is set in New York City. But then, I realized there is one particular queer rite of passage that would both be hilarious and would explain why Zhu bothers sticking around Ouyang.

I believe that it is a quintessential experience for a queer teenager to encounter an older queer person and immediately imprint upon them. They are now Your person, and nothing they say will convince you otherwise.

Imagine, if you will then, that you are a tired (and very broke) first year university student who has haplessly wandered into an empty coffeeshop. You've been unable to find a job yet, and you have far too much homework for it only been two weeks into the semester, so upon finding a cheap place that's open late you plant yourself down and begin to grond through your workload. You don't notice the eyes on you as you work, and you only realize you're being watched when the cashier/barista brings you another drink. You try to decline (because of the aforementioned No Money), but the teenager only smiles deviously and says the coffee is on the house. You have a vague inkling of dread, but are too broke to refuse. By the time you realize what has happened, it's too late and Zhu has already offered you a job. You can't say no. You are now doomed to spend the next four years at the whim of an annoying 14 year old (zhu is 16 actually) that has decided that you, as a slightly older queer person, are Their person now actually.