#and that's all. so less people try to crucify me for this take in case they want to lol

[nightlyrequiem]

The Other Side of Paradise

5) To Budding Friendships. (And More.)

Cross posted from AO3

Ch.1, Ch.2, Ch.3, Ch.4, Ch.5, Ch.6, Ch.7, Ch.8, Ch.9, Ch.10, Ch.11

You try to make the best of your life working at a small bakery in a city with rising cartel violence. One slower day, a man starts harassing your coworker. Despite the obvious threat, you stand up to him anyway. Unbeknownst to you, Valeria just so happened to be there to witness it.

A/N- All chapters containing smut will be labeled mature. The fic is fully written with the whole thing on AO3 but chapters on Tumblr will be posted one a day.

Tags/Warnings: Fluff, Angst, Dual POV, Happy Ending, Plot with Porn, Graphic Violence, Inappropriate Use of a Knife, Masturbation, WLW

You stare up at the two disemboweled corpses crucified against a building. They're both wearing cheap looking cowboy hats. Memento Mori is spray painted above them. You turn away from the gruesome sight, at risk of puking. You stand on the sidewalk for a few more minutes. Trying to process what you saw before you head into work. El Sin Nombre made a habit of displaying bodies, but all the other ones were kept on street corners wrapped under sheets. You force yourself to move on. There's nothing you can do for them now.

You enter the bakery and greet your coworker. Your thoughts are caught up on the vile display and you mess up four orders. Your coworker can tell something is wrong, but he doesn't bother asking. People are buzzing with conversation. You weren't the only one who saw it. They're smart enough to talk quietly but a few words are still loud enough to reach your ears. You slip off to the back, so you don't have to listen. You live in a cartel run town and you've lived long enough to see your fair share of gore but for whatever reason this is what's really sticking with you.

You should be working, or at least trying to but all you can do is stare at the soapy sink. You really wish you kept Valeria's number. You could really use someone to talk to. You should really keep your thoughts to yourself but you're sure you can talk to Valeria. She told you she liked how honest you were after all. You force yourself to start washing the dishes. The warm water burns a hidden cut you didn't notice. You gasp in surprise when someone puts a hand on your shoulder. You whip your head to the side and see Mateo. His thick brows are furrowed.

He says your name and looks at you.

"You've been washing the same plate for five minutes." You stare at him blankly. Have you? You're really out of it today. The corpses must be throwing you off.

"I'm sorry." You say haltingly. For once the look Mateo is giving you isn't one of thinly veiled irritation. He looks a little concerned.

"Do you need to take this shift off? Are you feeling sick?" You do in fact, feel a little sick. You don't really want to go home yet though.

"I'm fine," You're always fine. "I just had a bit of trouble getting to sleep last night, the AC is broken again." Mateo looks at you like he doesn't believe you but chooses not to press you on the matter.

"Okay...well...if you do just let me know." He says awkwardly, like he's not used to showing basic kindness. He walks off and leaves you to your work.

Valeria doesn't come to visit you during your shift, and you feel a little disappointed. You go home and keep your eyes averted when you have to pass by that building. You get back to your apartment and go inside. The chill from the AC makes gooseflesh rise on your bare arms. Your apartment is relatively small and empty. Maybe you should get a pet or something. Even a fish would make things look less lonely. You set down the treat basket and head off into the bathroom to wash the day away.

You exit the bathroom freshly clean and check your phone. You rarely get important notifications, but you still always check after being away for more than ten minutes. Just in case. To your surprise you have a few texts from an unsaved number. You know who it is without checking.

"It's Valeria. I was wondering if you were busy tonight?" You are not busy tonight. You're never busy after your shifts. You Sit on the couch and curl your feet up under you.

"No, I'm not busy." You set your phone down and wait for a response. You turn on the tv and watch impatiently. Dulce Obsesión is playing but you aren't really paying attention. The only thing that catches your attention is that one of the main characters looks a little like Valeria.

Twenty minutes later your phone dings and you check it immediately.

"Good. I want to take you out for drinks." She wants to go drinking with you. Aren't you special. You have work tomorrow and you're quite tired, but you won't turn down an opportunity. You try to wait a bit before replying immediately lest you come off as desperate. You are desperate though and decide that mindset is too juvenile at your big age.

"Sure, what bar were you thinking?"

Valeria replies quickly, easing your worries.

"Greenrose." Greenrose? You pick through your memories to see if you know the place. You aren't too familiar with bars. You gave up years ago because you felt lonely sitting in a crowded place where no one wanted to approach you. You don't have very much time to try and work out where it is before Valeria sends you another text.

"I'll pick you up, what's your address?" This almost feels like a date. You send her your address and rush back into the bathroom. You fix yourself up a little bit. You need to buy some new concealer though; you're running dangerously low.

You put on a cute outfit and wait on the couch. Despite the AC you still find yourself sweating and feeling a little too warm. Finally, a knock on your door ushers you to your feet. You wait a few seconds before opening the door. Valeria's eyes dart over you and her lips lift in a friendly smile.

"You look nice, let's go." She says. Turning and walking down the narrow stairs. you follow behind her. Valeria leads you to a clean looking car. She even opens the door for you. You feel a little excited. Your unpleasant feelings over the distressing sight from earlier are long forgotten.

You usually aren't out this late. There's no reason to be and it's generally not very safe. You feel safe with Valeria though.

"You have a nice car." You say. Admiring the clean interior. It looks new but smells used. There's a rosary tied to the rearview mirror. Valeria shoots you a smile before pulling away from the curb.

"Thank you." She sounds proud. You'd be proud too if you could afford a car like this. It looks like a high-end SUV. "It's pretty expensive but it's definingly worth the investment."

"Wow, what do you do for work?" You ask. Genuinely curious. Valeria pauses.

"Something in the pharmaceutical field." She replies vaguely. You tilt your head at her.

"You own a business?"

"Something like that, although I'm more of a... distributer."

You arrive at an admittedly nice-looking bar. The surrounding area looks a little sketchy though.

"I haven't been over here before." You say nervously. Valeria turns off the ignition and looks at you. Her eyes glinting in the low-level light.

"We'll be fine. I come here often." She says calmly. getting out. You do the same and shut the door. Following her into the bar. She confidently weaves her way through the small crowd. There aren't that many people inside but most of them match the area. There's a corner of boisterous men playing cards. A flock of women surrounding them. A few stragglers sit alone drinking. You try not to judge them too harshly. That was you at one point.

You look back to Valeria as she takes a seat at an empty booth. You sit down across from her. You aren't drinking alone this time.

"What do you want?" Valeria asks. "My treat." And she's buying you a drink? You're struggling to tell if this platonic or if she has ulterior motives. You hope it's the latter.

"Vodka lime." You say. Your go-to affordable drink. Valeria nods and gets up.

"I'll be right back."

While she's gone you take the chance to look around again. The men in the corner are still in the middle of their game, the loners are still alone. That makes you think of Valeria. You wonder why she picked you of all people to spend tonight with. Not that you're complaining. Having drinks with a pretty woman is more ideal than wasting your time watching telenovels.

Valeria comes back and sets down a tray of five shots and your Vodka lime. she wastes no time in downing one of them.

"Today was long, it feels nice to just unwind with good company." She says lowly. Locking her fingers together and resting her chin on them. "I haven't had the time to just be."

"Tonight's a good night to simply exist and relax." You remark. Taking a sip of your drink.

'I agree, I'm glad I could find the time to take a break." She hums. "It's nice to spend some time around another woman." She pauses. "Around you. outside the bakery I mean."

You smile and take another sip. You should slow down a little bit. It would be a shame if you got yourself too drunk and embarrassed yourself.

"Speaking of the bakery, I was a little disappointed to not see you today." You reply. Leaning back in your seat.

"Oh, well, my apologies I hate to disappoint," she says with faux seriousness. "I hope this little night out makes up for my transgression."

You forget to take it slow. You finish your Vodka lime and three shots. Valeria goes from a clear outline to slightly blurry. Sometime during the night, you moved from across her to beside her. Your shoulders and thighs brushing against hers. The topics of your conversations shift from work to hobbies to memories.

"I was dating this guy," Valeria murmurs. Your heads close together. "It was a long time ago, just after we graduated and-" She takes a sip from the whiskey she ordered a few minutes ago. "-And we were making out, and he threw up in my mouth." You gape at her then erupt into a flurry of quiet laughter.

"Was he at least a good kisser?"

Valeria snorts in amusement and shakes her head. You grin like a fool, having the most fun you've had in a while. Valeria leans in close enough for her breath to ghost over your face.

"No, he wasn't a very good kisser." She murmurs. The proximity is enough to cause your heart to go into a frenzy. You don't pull away though.

"No?" You reply quietly. "What about you? Are you a good kisser?" Valeria stares you in the eyes intently.

"I'm not sure, perhaps some feedback would help." She whispers.

Valeria begins to lean in when the phone in her back pocket starts to buzz. She pulls away, looking absolutely murderous. She pulls out the little flip phone and sighs. She gets up and runs a hand through her hair.

"I have to take this, it's work related." She walks off towards the exit and steps outside, leaving you by yourself. You wish she would've ignored it but what do you know? You don't run a pharmaceutical business. Or distribution. Or whatever else it was that she does for a living that you can't recall.

[curtklingermanposts]

Don't Gloss Over Truth

Why Some Lack Understanding

How many have said, “I wish I understood the Bible?” A prerequisite to understanding the Word of God is an honest heart that actually desires to know His truth. A reason some lack understanding is they are not considering what is said, much less, taking to it to heart. Basically, it equates to ignoring it. When a person ignores truth, he becomes ignorant to it as well. That ignorance can lead to outright rejection of truth. Truth challenges people to change, and some do not want to change. This is another reason people can’t seem to find time to read their Bible, or listen to the spoken Word. If one finds himself pushing back against the truth, one might ask, “Am I being carnal, (or flesh-driven)?” Romans 8:6-8 For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace, because the mind set on the flesh is hostile toward God; for it does not subject itself to the law of God, for it is not even able to do so, and those who are in the flesh cannot please God (NASB). The carnal mind, or flesh, relates to the old nature. Ultimately, it will die in the end. For those in Christ Jesus, it is counted as dead already. By God’s grace, we are able to follow the Spirit, while counting the flesh as dead. The more you place your mind on the things of the Spirit, the easier it will be to grasp the Word of God. Conversely, the more focused you are on the world, the more difficult it becomes. Galatians 2:20 I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, Who loved me, and gave Himself for me.

Ignorance is No Excuse

“Ignorance of the law is not excuse” can actually be applied to the Word, especially when goes beyond mere lack of knowledge. People have a misconception that God will not hold people accountable for what they do not know. What does God have to say about it? Hosea 4:6 My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge: because thou hast rejected knowledge, I will also reject thee, that thou shalt be no priest to me: seeing thou hast forgotten the law of thy God, I will also forget thy children. It is one thing to be ignorant due to the lack of learning; it’s another to be ignorant, because one refuses to learn. In everyday life, most have experienced this to various degrees. Have you ever made a poor choice, because you refused to learn all the facts involved? Perhaps, you knew the consequences, but did something anyway. Depending on specifics, the consequences of ignorance can be quite profound. In some cases, destruction awaits those who are willingly ignorant.

Take His Truth to Heart

Underscoring a previous point, if we gloss over what we read, we miss much of what the Lord desires to reveal to us. This is easy to do if we’re trying to read by volume, or rushing through our devotion, just so we can get done for the day. There is a difference between quality and quantity. Of course, a quantity of quality is an awesome thing. It may prove much more beneficial to meditate on single passage of Scripture than to quickly read a chapter, or book. When we take His Word to heart, we are more apt to dig to find the riches of the meaning found in the words. It is easy to gloss over something we don’t understand, such as a particular word used in a verse. The challenge is to find the meaning of the word in a dictionary. To drill down even deeper, a Strong’s Concordance with a Hebrew/Chaldean/Greek dictionary is rather useful, since it goes into the original languages. What if it still doesn’t make sense after using a dictionary, or Strong’s Concordance? Sometimes, we need to meditate on it, and wait on Holy Spirit for revelation (the revealing of an already existing truth), which requires us to be teachable. The New Man already understands, which is why we get a sense of knowing, even if we may not be able to articulate it in the moment. Our conscious mind simply has to catch up.                                  Be encouraged, God is faithful to reveal His truth. Nonetheless, we do have a part to play. Moreover, there is a proving process taking place, when we don’t immediately grasp the things of God. Proverbs 25:2 It is the glory of God to conceal a thing: but the honour of kings is to search out a matter.

perfectfaith.org

[what-on-earth-is-love]

it's kind of bizarre to me when people call vanitas and jeanne's romance rushed because like,, it's not supposed to be natural, it's not supposed to be a good romance either. i really don't know how some of you guys came to that conclusion with a relationship that basically starts with a non-con kiss on a first meeting? don't get me wrong, i don't like this ship either and even after their relationship got a bit better i just can't ignore how it started. it's a chaotic toxic relationship between two very traumatized people who never learned how to navigate a relationship healthily, not a romance whose sole purpose is the viewer's enjoyment

[killerskillercaptain]

Offer me that Deathless Death

Title inspired by the song take me to church by hozier (obviously).

pairing : Levi Ackerman x reader

synopsis : takes place in season 4, Levi's comrades took the wine Zeke poisoned with his blood, Levi has to kill his own, he then comes to you with a request you think you can't deny him.

tw : non consensual intercourse, rape, angst.

warnings : MINORS DNI, nsfw after the cut.

a/n : might need to proofread a second time.

"I'll wait for you, come after fifteen minutes" he said, voice so flat and icy. Levi had made up his mind, and prepared yours, he had explained his request and his reasons in simple words, and to you, that left you no choice.

His tent wasn't that far from where you two were standing having this horrible conversation, but he wanted you to wait before following him, so it doesn't look suspicious you thought but if hat was the case, it was wicked of him since no one was around to whisper or judge, was he being haunted by their ghosts right now ?

You have been in this field for weeks now, you and Levi had to guard Zeke in this camp. In this deep dark forest, there was you, Levi and Zeke, or more correctly you were the only ones left, Zeke exterminated all of your comrades by making them drink that damned wine, and you watched horrified as Levi had to unsheathe his blades to kill his own kind now in the form of titans. He managed to capture back Zeke and dragged him to his tent where he tied him up with a thunder spear to make sure Zeke wouldn't try anything again. Levi didn't have the same look in his eyes after he had to execute those closest to him, he looked spent, he looked scary, and what he asked of you just after he tied Zeke made you want to throw up.

It had became clear to you that Levi was on the edge of losing his mind after he had to orchestrate this killing, the killing of his own comrades that he trained and shaped with his own hands, all because of a stupid bottle of wine, this was surreal and he hadn't anticipated it. This horrible event, the insomnia, the sitting on the edge not knowing what was happening with Eren and what was he ready to do made Levi swing dangerously between sanity and some kind of dementia, his frustration got to unfathomable heights and for a second he thought of taking his own life, he couldn't take being the reaper anymore, when he realized he thought of ending it all, his eyes landed on you, standing a few feet from him and thought that maybe there was a receptacle to pour out his frustration and maybe come back elevated and maybe, just maybe, a little bit less suicidal so he can go on with saving humanity. He came to you, stood right before you and asked you if you would allow him to take you. You understood right away what he meant, he left you with this a choice so horrible it made your ears ring, you either let him use you to incapsulate his anger and despair or he swore he would lose it, he made it clear he was hanging on by a thread.

What choice did you have ? Say no, save yourself, and risk humanity's only hope to lose his mind or crucify yourself here and now and save humanity. You chose the latter.

Teeth gritting, tears pouring silently and jaw clenching tightly, you held on whatever sanity you had left. Feet clinging and legs shaking, Levi was deflowering you in a place where everything should be happening but this.

Levi's harsh hand jolted up to muffle your voice, preventing you from being too loud, but ghosts don't have ears you thought, and Zeke ? well fuck Zeke, it was all his fault.

This was wrong, this shouldn't be happening yet it was, as hard as he didn't want this reality to be real, it was. Levi was really the villain of the day.

He thought about everything he sacrificed, every comrade he lead to death with his own commands, with his own words, with his own hands, only to see their only hope, Eren, turn his back on them, not only was he turning his back but he was commanding the downfall of the very people who stood by him.

Levi felt as if his hands were once again stained by forbidden blood, and just like that, once again, he felt as if he was on the verge of losing it all again, his mind was dizzy yet knew exactly what to do, he had the choice between two things, either let everything go to hell or find something to empty his mind and his inner turmoil in, he chose the second unforgivable salvation, he came to you.

You muffled your voice, you strangled your thoughts and you locked your conscious in a place you may never come back to later, this abomination was killing you while you tried to convince yourself that it was for the greater good, that you were here being stripped of what made you human to save humanity's only hope.

In a jolt, you dug your nails into his upper arms scratching him, drawing red lines all over the skin, no sensuality to the act, it was pain, pure pain, pain like you never felt before, you knew deep down it was more of a response to the mental suffering you were enduring right now than the physical one, you had been thrown over high heights, had ribs crushed between titanic fingers, have been impaled with arrows on multiple occasions, but you could tell without hesitation, that this, right now, was the most excruciating pain you had to experience. You came back alive from so many battles, but you weren't coming back from this one.

A part of you wanted to gouge out Levi Ackerman, tear him and his skin apart from you, the thought of getting one of your blades and pierce through his being with it crossed your mind quickly, you wanted to get out of this horror sanctuary.

What scared you the most was that this part of you, the one that refused Levi, was so small and so weak next to the part that still wanted him to stay, that wanted to put a calming hand on his raven haired head, wanted to shush him, wanted to lull him, wanted to tell him that i's okey, that he will survive after he would have finished taking everything from you.

The person you admired the most and held the greatest amount of affection for using you like this was gut wrenching, the hardest part was that he wasn't doing it because of a carnal need or because he wanted to indulge himself nor was he misusing his position in hierarchy, the hardest part to accept, was that he himself was suffering, didn't want to, and had no choice but to.

Your insides churned with an almost bittersweet pain, all the grunts, the biting on your neck, the nails sunk into your skin, all of this could've been painted in complete other colors, in an other life, in another reality. But here you were, dripping in tears and shame at the touch of the man you held in so much regards,

the man you loved secretly.

His anger, his rage, and his despair were all running through your veins now. This was a secret to be shushed forever between you too, you helped Levi Ackerman keep his sanity that night, but at the cost of your own.

[barbarab1707-blog]

About Dany the Dragon, chains, and how Jon sealed his fate at the Dragonpit meeting

Daenerys is a dragon. I think no one can argue with that. She calls herself the Mother of Dragons, people call her the Dragon Queen. 

She also sees herself as a dragon, as per this:

And this:

Olenna even tells her: “You’re a dragon, be a dragon” which is also the “counsel” Missandei gives her before her death, “Dracarys” (=be a dragon).

And at the end the showrunners show us this:

Dany has finally completely embraced her inner dragon.

How does this tie in with the Dragonpit meeting? Well, this scene is full of foreshadowing of what is bound to happen in season 08, especially regarding Dany the Dragon and Jon’s fate.

Before the dragonpit meeting, we have this piece of dialogue: “Dragons don’t understand the difference between what’s theirs and what isn’t. Land, livestock, children. Letting them roam free around the city was a problem.”

So, dragons don’t make the distinction between what’s theirs and what isn’t. Dany being a dragon, she is the same. 

Which is shown by this (land):

Dany not making the difference between which lands belong to her or not, could be further illustrated when Dany tells Jon this in s08: “what happens when they demand you press your claim and take what’s MINE.” She considers the 7 Kingdoms to be hers, when they are, by right, Jon’s.

This (livestock):

And this (children):

The second part of the sentence about letting dragons roam free is more important though. The Dragonpit was built in order to contain the dragons and control the damage they could do. 

In Dany’s case, what prevents her doing too great a damage, what controls her inner dragon and prevents it to “roam free” are her counsellors. They are her Dragonpit if one could say. Jorah, Barristan, Tyrion, all helped at one point or another to stop her unleashing her inner dragon, which manifests as anger. They also all failed at one point or another.

From the beginning of season 04, Dany herself started slowly slowly fearing her inner dragon, her own power and anger, which coincided with the moment where she started fearing her children’s power and wildness. This culminated with her locking and chaining Rhaegal and Viseryon in s04e10 and thus, trying to repress her nature.

However, trying to repress her nature didn’t seem to work all that well for her.

Besides, while his brothers were in chains, Drogon was still “roaming free”, which could mean that, as much as Dany tried to repress her impulsive and prone to anger nature, she still couldn’t fight it completely. Something that is confirmed when she feeds Meereenese nobles to the still chained Rhaegal and Viseryon mid-season 05, after Barristan’s death which angered her. 

Moreover, at that point of time, she doesn’t have anyone to keep her in check anymore, as Jorah is in exile, and Barristan is dead. Instead, she has Daario and Missandei encouraging her to embrace her inner dragon. Dany starts reconciling with it when she escapes the fighting pits on Drogon’s back. She is free again to be who she is. She embraces again her inner dragon when she burns the khals and takes over the khalasar (something that isn’t hers to begin with but feels entitled to have).

She wants to go full on dragon when she makes that speech to Tyrion when she returns to Meereen:”I will crucify the masters, I will set their fleets afire, kill every last one of their soldiers and return their cities to the dirt. That, is my plan.” Tyrion, who has taken Jorah’s and Barristan’s vacant positions, manages however to temper her first impulse. 

But, it’s interesting to note that he was the one to set Rhaegal and Viseryon free from their chains which was 2 episodes prior to her unleashing her anger on the khals.

Tyrion freeing them from their chains is interesting on a symbolic level and as foreshadowing as well, as in season 07, Tyrion’s bad decision making is what provokes Dany’s anger more and more, progressively awakening her inner dragon.

That’s when another comes in to help keep it in check once again: Jon.

From mid-season 07 until the end of s08e04, Jon is the one to act as Dany’s chains/Dragonpit.

However, s05 Dany, Jorah, Barristan, Tyrion, Varys and Jon all forgot something important:

You are damn right, Jorah. No one can tame Dany’s inner dragon, not even herself. (Sorry about the typo in the picture, I got it elsewhere, I’m too lazy to make my own).

And they forgot this:

Interesting we got reminded of that at the Dragonpit meeting. I think we heard that one before, didn’t we?

Hey, look! Drogon is in chains…Kraznys is at the other end of the chains, thinking he is in charge. But Dany is actually the one holding the whip in that scene. She is the master, the one with power. And hey, Kraznys even calls Drogon “a beast”. Doesn’t that remind us of something?

I’m not saying Jon is Kraznys, I’m just pointing the fact they both see dragons as beasts and both think dragons can be controlled, bound to their will, or in other words, chained to them. In Kraznys’ case, it was an actual dragon, in Jon’s case, it was Dany. Kraznys fell into Dany’s trap, failed in controlling Drogon and Dany unleashed her anger on Astapor. 

In s07e06, we also have this:

Another dragon in chains! I’m starting to think now that this ridiculous scene had a symbolic purpose. The only one who could actually bind a dragon to his will is the Night King. And it makes sense, doesn’t it? After all, Dany bound her dragons to herself with blood magic and the NK bound Viseryon to himself with his magic. Only Dany’s Ice counterpart to her Fire could do it. No one else.

Let’s have a look at another moment at the Dragonpit. This is what Jon told Cersei when he refused her conditions:

“I am true to my word, or I try to be. That is why I cannot give you what you ask. I cannot serve two queens. And I have already pledged myself to Daenerys of House Targaryen.”

And this was his speech when Tyrion told him he should have lied: “I’m not gonna swear an oath I can’t uphold. Talk about my father if you want, tell me that’s the attitude that got him killed, but when enough people make false promises, words stop meaning anything. Then there are no more answers, only better and better lies, and lies won’t help us in this fight.”

What does that have to do with anything? will you ask in a Sansa fashion. Well, the interesting thing about Jon’s speech on promises and lies is the chain on the floor while he does it.

The chain looks like this after Jon kills the wight:

Then, just before he starts his speech about oaths, promises and lies, it looks like this:

The chain has been rearranged on the floor by the staff, as we can see that on the second picture it is further away from the wight’s remains than on the first picture. Also, its spiral shape looks better. It is supposed to mean something.

Jon steps inside the spiral shaped chain right before his speech about promises and lies. The photo below is taken after he’s finished though:

What does it mean then?

The first meaning I spoke about was the obvious one, Jon is still chained/tied to his mission, as the wight’s remains at the end of the chain show us. Which leads him to:

Fall into a trap he creates for himself. 

When he “bent the knee, but” on the boat, he lied to Daenerys, or, as Tyrion put it so well in s07e03 (when he convinces Dany to let Jon mine the dragonglass), he gave her “something by giving her nothing”. However, at the Dragonpit, Cersei puts him on the spot, and he has to cover up for his previous lie and assure Dany of his loyalty to her. By pledging himself and the North to her in front of everyone, he is swearing an oath he cannot back out of. Even less after talking about upholding oaths and words meaning nothing when false promises are made. Those very words chain him to his public pledge to Dany. That’s what the chains are showing us, Jon, in season 08, feels he has no choice but to be true to his word, it is a matter of honour. This, in turn, leads him to:

engage himself in a spiral of lies and events (spiral shape) he won’t be able to get out of (chains). The only thing that finally frees him of this spiralling is her death.

He thought he could bind her to his will, control her. Instead, he got himself in chains, like the shot below shows:

Jon is inside the spiral while Dany stands at the other end of the chain. Dany, like in the scene with Kraznys, is actually the master, the one in charge. Jon, through his decision to pledge himself to her, has made himself her prisoner. We can say that from the moment he stepped foot on Dragonstone until the moment he killed her, he never ceased being her prisoner. Sansa was right, by going to Dragonstone, Jon walked into a trap. Not only the one he created for himself at the Dragonpit, but also the one Tyrion had set up for him when he invited him to Dragonstone without mentioning he had to bend the knee. 

Anyway, he walked into a trap, then failed in controlling Dany’s inner dragon, and she unleashed her anger on King’s Landing. Just like in the scene with Kraznys really.  It’s worth pointing that Dany is standing in KL (a city she will destroy) when she repeats the same words she told Kraznys in Astapor (a city she destroyed). She freed the people of Astapor, and later on, she “freed” the people of KL (albeit in a tiny bit extreme way). It looks like a kind of echo to me.

For those who would like to say that Jon becomes the dragon in chains, I will say no no no. Jon’s personality has nothing to do with Targaryen mentality, he is a Stark through and through!

Well… except maybe for… falling for his sister? Alright, alright, maybe he is the chained dragon here, but just a little bit, okay? Let’s say he is a winged wolf in chains, yes?

Seriously though, I wonder if, by showing us the two scenes displaying chains in season 07, they weren’t trying to draw a parallel between Viseryon the dragon being bound to the Night King’s will (Ice), and Jon the dragon being bound to Dany’s will (Fire). Without Viseryon nor Jon having a real choice in it either. 

One other thing that I feel foreshadows Jon’s fate in season 08. Before the Dragonpit meeting, Tyrion says: “but in the beginning, when it was home to Balerion the Dread, it must have been the most dangerous place in the world”. Jon in season 08, acts as Dany’s illusory dragonpit/chains, he prevents her from doing damage as best as he can. But she sees him as a threat and he is afraid of her which is understandable, as being too close to a locked and/or chained dragon is still a dangerous position to be in:

It’s interesting to see that the Dragonpit, which is the place where Jon sealed his fate, is a ruin. Jon, who is Dany’s last metaphorical Dragonpit, ends up broken. A dangerous position to be in indeed. 

Am I going too far here?

To conclude this thing, I’d like to mention another scene in that same episode that foreshadows as well Jon’s fate as a prisoner of Dany’s. It is the one with Theon. 

Theon mentions his time as a prisoner of Ramsay’s and how Yara, his sister, was the only one to try and save him. In season 08, Sansa is the only one who tries, in a desperate move, to save Jon, by telling Tyrion his secret. Most importantly, she goes to KL with an army to try and free him at the very end, while he is still a prisoner (but of Grey Worm’s now. Geeez, poor Jon…). The parallel can even go on, as Yara failed in freeing Theon and bringing him back home, and Sansa, although she manages to free Jon, fails in bringing him back home too. Jon is a broken man, Theon was a broken man. In season 08, Theon chooses love for the Starks and Sansa over duty to Yara, his Queen. Jon at the end chooses love for Sansa over duty to Daenerys, his Queen. 

Anyway, those were my latest messy ramblings and that’s all for now.

Thanks for reading!

[samuel-de-champagne-problems]

Crawl Home to Her

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem BAU Reader 

Warnings: Religion is mentioned, slight mention of supposed homophobia, drug use, death and thoughts of dying, kidnapping (it’s Spencer’s POV of Revelations)

Author’s Note: I was listening to Work Song by Hozier and felt like it fits PERFECTLY for what Spencer was going through when he was kidnapped by Tobias. I took some creative liberties, but much of the plot lines up to the show’s episode. I linked the song if anyone wants to listen to it before they read or after, it’s such a beautiful song. Hozier is in my top three artists; his voice is just so beautiful and soulful. 

Summary: The only thing that’s keeping Spencer alive is the memories of his Heaven. Maybe someone how a faithless man will escape Death’s grasp on faith alone. 

Word Count: around 3.2K

Category: Angst 

Crawl Home to Her

When Spencer comes to the first thing he notices is the smell of burning. The stench permeates the air around him, filling his nostrils. The second thing he notices is breathing. Breathing that is not his own. A man stands before him and it takes him a second to piece it all together. The throbbing in his head takes much of his energy. He can feel the blood drip down the back of his neck and cake onto the collar of his work shirt. Strangely, all he could think about is the time his father told him a respectable man never wore a spoiler shirt. Well dad, look at me now, Spencer thinks grimly. He hates that his father occupies his mind even when he’s about to die. He has much more beautiful things to think about than the man who called him a failure.

“They’re gone,” the shadowy figure tells him. Tobias, Spencer thinks. Tobias is the unsub. 

“Who are they?,” Spencer asks, his voice must sound as cowardly as he feels. He hopes that Tobias didn’t get Y/N. He can’t live with himself if he let his partner, in more ways than one, get hurt. 

“It’s just me know,” Tobias answers, in such a way that it’s almost obvious. 

“Who...Who are you?” Spencer croaks. The lightbulb hanging above his head taunts him. He has the lightbulb, but where’s the ideas? Where are the answers? Where is the light of safety? 

“I’m Raphael,” Tobias says, standing to his full height, towering over a trembling Spencer. 

Raphael... The angel...Spencer’s mind turns but is halted by the horrible smell coming from his side. It invades his mind and nothing seems to make sense. 

“What’s that smell?” he asks.

“They’re burning fish hearts and livers. Keeps away the devil,” Tobias or Raphael answers, Spencer is not too sure who he’s even talking to at this point.

“They say you can see inside men’s minds,” 

“That’s not true, I-I study human behavior-” Spencer reasons, but is cut off by Tobias/Raphael’s passive shushing. 

“I’m not interested in the arguments of men,” Raphael tells him. He turns around to rummage in his pocket for something that Spencer can’t make out in the dim light of the shed. Between the lightbulb blinding him and the stench of the liver burning, Spencer’s senses are overloading themselves. Focus, Spencer, focus, he begs of himself. 

Don’t let him win. Don’t let him win. 

Tobias pulls out a revolver and a bullet. He toys the bullet in Spencer’s face, asking him “Do you know what this is?” 

He doesn’t answer. He doesn’t blink. He doesn’t breathe. 

“It’s God’s will,” Tobias says rationally. 

The cocks the gun and aims it towards Spencer’s head. If he pulls the trigger he’d shoot him straight in his head. Staring down death, all Spencer can think about is him suggesting that they split up. He was the one who left Y/N, he’s the one that’s responsible.

“You don’t have to do this,” Spencer tries to reason. 

“I’m just an instrument of God. This is your salvation, this is time to repent for your sins,” Tobias says, pulling a chair to sit next time. It’s strange, Spencer thinks, Tobias is not that much older than he is. This job has forced Spencer to think of the countless paths that he could have gone down. Part of him thinks that could have easily been on the other side, the angry part of him, the broken and sad part of him. 

“Tell me your sins, and may God forgive you,” Tobias says, his voice almost as fearful as Spencer feels. 

Spencer closes his eyes, trying to think of all the things he’s done wrong in his life. All the people he’s hurt or the mistakes that he’s made. But at this moment there’s nothing running through his mind by the thought of Y/N. The way she’d hold him after a case or the way that she’d listen to him with light in her eye’s. It’s nice to have someone who cares, Spencer thinks. Or at least it was. 

“I’m a good man, Tobias, I’m a good man. Like you, we catch the bad guys, Tobias--we are the same. We catch the sinners.” Spencer professes, trying anything to get out of here alive. He’d do anything to get back to Y/N. To get back in her warm embrace. 

“We all have our sins, including you. You just need sometime to sort them out,” Tobias says, and like that he’s gone with the wind. 

***

It’s early morning when Spencer wakes up, the sun bleeds through the cracks of the wood panel door. His clothes are caked in his blood and dirt. His hair is stringy and the blood from his ear clogs his hearing. But he’s alive, he's still here, breathing the same air as Y/N. Somehow that’s enough to keep him hoping that she’d find him- save him. 

The door opens with a sudden slam, Tobias walks in carrying a load of logs. There’s something different about him. Spencer thinks that there’s an air of arrogance, an air of superiority in his walk. 

“What are you staring at, boy?” Tobias- or at least the man who looks like Tobias Hankel asks. 

“You’re not Raphael?” Spencer reasons. 

Tobias throws the pile of logs into the box on the floor of the shed. He stands up to his full height, but there’s something that’s taller about him than last night. There’s something more intimating about the man standing before Spencer. 

“Do I look like Raphael to you?” Tobias asks, the sneer so apparent. 

Spencer decides to ignore that, answering this person, whoever he is, is not in his best interest. 

“Thank you for burning these, for keeping us safe,” Spencer says, trying to get on his good side for his sake, so he can go back to Y/N. 

Y/N. If Spencer can just close off his mind and focus on her, he’d be okay. He’d get through this. If he can just close his eyes he can just feel her touch or taste her lips against his. If her kisses make him a sinner then crucify him. Least he’d die a happy man, with the promise of tomorrow with her endless love. 

“Don’t try to trick me, you’re are filthy liar, you’re a disgusting sinner,” 

God, Spencer thinks, waits until he hears that he’s from Vegas and fell in love with a man. Spencer focuses on breathing, not the itch from being dirty with his own blood or not the thought of impending death. 

“It will be over if you confess, boy. Confess your sins!” Tobias yells. 

“I’m not a sinner,” Spencer says, almost defiantly. There’s a surge of strength in Spencer, and he swears that the small memories of Y/N makes him a stronger person. 

“We are all sinners” 

“The Lord spoke unto Moses saying, ‘speak unto all the congregation of the children of the lord’  and say unto them, ye shall be holy, for I, the lord your god, am holy,” Spencer quotes, the fear somehow seeping back into his voice. 

“You know Leviticus,” Tobias says, almost surprised. Yes, Spencer thinks, even heathens can quote the Bible. 

“I know every word of the Bible, I can quote it for you?” Spencer pleads. 

“Even the Devil can read,” Tobias tells him. 

Spencer’s wound bleeds down his neck, the throbbing almost pounds to the beat of his heart.

“It’s time to confess, Spencer Reid,” Tobias whispers, leaning into Spencer. 

“I’m a good man, Tobias. I finally found someone who puts back the pieces. I found someone who loves me, and I can’t leave her like this. I can’t do that to her.” Spencer confesses. 

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs,” Tobias quotes, and as he does his face seems to drift off. It’s like he's there with Spencer, but not there at the same time.

“First Corinthians, Verse 13,” Spencer recites. 

“Hmm, so your parents did raise a believer,” Tobias reckons. 

More or less, Spencer thinks. He might not believe in God the Almighty, some entity in the clouds watching over him, but he does believe in love and maybe even an afterlife. He has to believe in an afterlife, because if he doesn’t he’d fail to give Y/N forever. 

“Yes,” Spencer says, settling on playing the part of a righteous believer. 

“Yes, my parents read me the Bible. They are good people too,” Spencer tells him. 

Spencer’s not really sure what happens next, but the blow to his head makes the world go black and the sweet memories of Y/N fade into the distance. 

*** 

A cool rag presses against Spencer’s head, where he figures where “Tobias” hit him, or whoever was there with him. 

Dissociative Identity Disorder. DID. DSM-5. 300.14 (F44.81). Tobias has three personalities, Spencer thinks. He remembers the day vidily. Reading about DID with Ethan, they sat on the lawn of the park near school. His memories are distrubed by a very confused looking Tobias, who hold bandages and a wet rag. 

“What’s your name?” Spencer asks, hoping that whoever was there last night is gone. 

“Tobias,” he says, almost meekly. Spencer recognizes something in that, somewhere deep inside him, he recognizes the fear that Tobias wears like a shield. The man here last night must have been his father... 

“Who was here last night?” 

“My father, Charles,” Tobias says. “I’m sorry if he hurt you.” 

Tobias turns to reach in his bag, he brings out a vial of clear liquid, a needle and a long piece of cloth. He ties the long piece of cloth around Spencer’s arm, who with a sudden realization fights to get away from Tobias. 

“NO! Please, NO!” Spencer yells, trying his hardest to fend off the inevitable. 

“It helps, Spencer. I’m trying to save you from him! It’s gonna help, it helped me,” Tobias tells him, continuing to tie the fabric in a tight knot above Spencer’s elbow. 

“Please! I don't want it!” Spencer pleads as the room folds in one him, the darkness is not welcoming, it's suffocating. It’s sucking the life out of him and he can’t escape it’s clutches. 

***

There’s another person in this shed, Spencer thinks. He tries to strain his eyes to make out who it is. It’s not Tobias, the shadow is too short for him. 

Y/N. 

She’s wearing a dress, the blue dress that she wore on their first date. He loves that dress on her. He’s sure he’d love any dress or anything she’d put on to wear for their first date, because well, it’s their first date. 

“Spencer,” her voice is even more comforting than usual. It’s syrupy sweet and he feels like he’d get a toothache just from listening. 

“Sweet Spencer, you need to come home to me, okay? Come home to me baby.” 

He tries to call out to her, but it’s futile. She's a ghost, but she looked so real. Maybe he’s the ghost and his eternal damnation is to haunt her. He’s able to see her, but never able to get close enough to feel the way her hands caress his checks or the way her eyes light up at his touches. 

The spooky beauty of his girlfriend is whisked away with the familiar shoots of two tall, skinny figures. His parents. His father sits there on the table with a sneer on his face. His mother has this faraway look on her face. Spencer’s twelve again, listening to his father yell and slam the bedroom door as he rushes out the door, never looking back. 

The shadowy figures are gone as soon as they came and are nothing but a reminder to Spencer that he’s not worthy of love. He feels guilty. He really does, but the needle going into his vein brings back Y/N and for now he wants nothing more, but to see her, even if it’s not real. 

***

Spencer’s not sure if he craves the clear liquid in the vial because he gets to see Y/N or if he craves to see Y/N because gets to the liquid coursing through his veins, the slightest reminder that he’s alive. 

He’s alone in the shed, but there’s a bright green light blinking. A computer, he wonders. Is this the way from the Ninth Circle of Hell? Is this his way home, his way to Y/N? 

His thoughts of home and of their warm bed are interrupted by who he can only assume is Raphael, enough time has passed for him to be rising to the surface. Part of him misses Tobias, they’d probably would have been friends growing up. Two outcasts raised by a parent who meant well, but did do irreparable harm in the end. 

“It’s time to choose,” Raphael announces. He points to the computer screen, which lights up. Spencer can only assume that his face is being streamed across the internet. Garcia, and probably the entire team are watching this, watching him at his lowest moment. He swore that he’d never show Y/N himself like this, even though he knows that she’ll love him still. 

“Choose a member of your team to die. You are all sinners in the end, but it’s time for you to choose who dies.” Raphael tells him, his voice booming, a stark difference from the nervous murmurs of Tobias. 

“No,” Spencer shouts. “Kill me, kill me instead!” 

“Choose or they all die!” Raphael yells. 

Think, Spencer. Think. He looks around at the shed, trying to think of an out. His eyes latch on to the shovel sitting in the corner of the room. That’s new, he realizes. A cemetery, a grave... 

“I choose Y/N,” Spencer says, not truly believing what he’s saying, but praying that she gets the message. 

“Why?” Raphael asks. 

“She’s prideful and careless,” Spencer reasons, trying his hardest to appear nonchalant. 

“Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before the fall,” Raphael quotes. 

“Yes, John 14:27,” Spencer says. And with that his fate and Y/N is sealed. It’s funny in a twisted way, he always knows that his fate would be forever linked to hers, but not just in this way. 

“Come on, boy. Get up,” Raphael orders him. 

Spencer makes it to his feet and the pair make their way into the night. 

***

Spencer’s not sure how far he’s walked, but his feet are numb and he can’t feel anything in his arm. The inside of his arm is littered with marks, a constant reminder of the cravings he’s feeling. No, he tells himself. What he craves is Y/N. He makes his way up the rocky terrain of the cemetery, hoping that she’s on her way to rescue him, hoping that she’s there to wash away the dirt and kiss his scars. 

Raphael is at his side, pulling him along. It's a strange similarity to Dante and Virgil and their journey to the depths of Hell. Maybe in this scenario Spencer isn’t Dante, maybe he’s Beatrice waiting for his Dante to rescue him. 

“Please, I need rest. I’m exhausted,” Spencer tries to argue, but it’s no use. Raphael’s grip on his arm only tightens. 

“Keep moving,” 

They arrive at the cemetery. Spencer is not ready to die. He’s not ready to die and leave Y/N. He wishes he really did believe in God because maybe, maybe he wouldn’t be as scared as he is right now. 

“Dig,” Raphael tells him, tossing the shovel on the ground at Spencer’s feet. 

As if he’s shaking Death’s hand, Spencer reaches down for the shovel and starts to dig. Each deposit in the mountain of dirt is a cry for help. Each time he cracks his neck in pain or rubs his hands in exhaustion is a goodbye kiss for Y/N. 

Spencer stands to his full height. He’s nearly as tall as Tobias, somehow he still feels like a child. 

He suspects that Tobias feels the same way. Maybe one day Spencer will come to regret his choice. Maybe one day Spencer will be grateful that he reached into the very depths of his strength to fight to the very end. 

“Tell Tobias I’m sorry,” Spencer says, the tears flooding his eyes. 

Spencer bangs the back of the shovel against Tobias’s head. His limp body falls to the ground and suddenly he’s terrified that Tobias is somehow still alive. Spencer scrambles for the gun and pulls the trigger. He’s not even sure how many shots he fires but the body is punctured with bloody holes. Spencer, clutches are Tobias’s lifeless body. As if he can squeeze him back to life. 

He thinks he’s imagining it. He thinks that he’s on the brink of death. There’s a light, a soft yellow light beckoning him home. A voice calls out to him, clear and strong, it’s drawing him in and Spencer is crawling from his own grave to the voice that he could recognize anywhere. He’s teetering between Heaven and Hell. Y/N’s voice and light tether him home. 

“Spencer!” she calls. Finally, he thinks. Finally, she’s close; he lets himself believe he’s safe. 

“I’m here!” he shouts, surprised at the force of his voice. 

“Oh Spencer,” she says, running to him. 

She falls to the ground next to him. Spencer is scared that she’s not real, that it’s the drugs in his system again making him believe that she’s nothing but a cruel figment of his mind. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I knew you’d find me. Please forgive me, I didn’t mean it,” Spencer cries, his face tucked into the crook of her neck. 

“Shhh, baby. I’d find you anywhere. Hmm, let’s get you out of here. You are safe now Spencer,” she tells him softly. 

Spencer may not be a man who believes in God but he has to believe in Heaven, because Heaven is holding him in her arms. 

Author’s Note: Thank you for reading! 

[innuendostudios]

Thoughts on... some funny games

[no spoilers to speak of]

Thoughts on Lair of the Clockwork God

The wisdom of the gaming cognoscenti insists that comedy is hard to do in video games. Having grown up with Monkey Island and Zork, I've never found this convincing. But one true thing is this: it's hard to write about comedic games. The ineffability of humor is hard enough to describe in less-interactive media; I can't even explain to my partner why Gretchen saying "I met January Jones once!" on You're the Worst busted me up, and they were sitting right next to me when she said it. Throw in the "you had to be there" nature of the player's active participation and I lose myself in a cornfield. The thing I found hilarious might come a beat to early for you, or not at all, or not be funny in text like it is in gameplay.

Why did I like Lair of the Clockwork God? It made me laugh.

The premise and particulars are a lot of "that could go either way." Ben and Dan - stars of Ben There, Dan That and Time Gentleman, Please! - have returned. Ben is still an adventure game star, but Dan has adopted platforming mechanics in an attempt to get with the times. So playing the game involves switching back and forth between a character who can leap across canyons but can't pick up items or talk to people, and one who can combine inventory but can't climb over a 3-pixel rock.

Does that sound potentially funny? Potentially grating? Yes to both!

The plot centers around our heroes trying to save the world from several simultaneous apocalypses and having to teach human emotions to a supercomputer in order to do so. (Don't ask.) These means, rather like Ben There, Dan That, traipsing through a number of fantasy worlds (read: computer simulations) until the correct emotion is provoked. This requires cross-genre cooperation: finding ways to get Ben to areas only Dan can access, getting Dan new power ups by combining objects in Ben's inventory (an act Dan insists on calling "crafting").

The best bits are at these intersections, when Dan's platforming is the puzzliest and Ben's puzzles take advantage of Dan's skills. Periodically the game gives you a Dan-centric platforming gauntlet the controls are NOT precise nor pleasant enough for, or a Ben-only moon logic puzzle that leaves you googling the walkthrough.

But I liked it! A lot. The genre-hopping seems to have invigorated the developers, Ben Ward and Dan Marshall. I discussed my favorite joke in Ben There, Dan That (in what is probably the least popular video I've ever made that wasn't asking for money), but was also dismayed that the game was never that clever again. But this one is, several times over! Progression here involves cheating your way to a better respawn zone, goofing around in game menus, exploiting "glitches," exiting out and loading up entirely other games. There is a lot of poking and prodding at what a game of this nature can or should be.

But, honestly? The only real selling point is... it was funny. The humor is as anarchic and metatextual as in previous titles, but it feels good-natured in a way BT,DT didn't. And there are, here and there, little bits of meat on its bones - the characters wondering if, as a couple thirtysomething white guys, the world hasn't left them behind, no longer comfortable with the juvenile humor of their youth but not really understanding the youth of today, but having not yet fully escaped the mentalities they used to hold. (There's an unspoken humor to Dan's idea of "modern" gameplay being 2D platforming mechanics, especially at a time when adventure games are significantly more popular than on his last outing; this is a good joke whether or not it's intentional.)

Also: this game contains the most poignant urinating-on-a-grave puzzle in gaming history, and you may quote me on that.

Having finished it months ago, I can't even remember what all the gags were that tickled me at the time. Comedy fades from memory faster than drama or frustration. Mostly I just remember having a good time.

Thoughts on The Darkside Detective

Here's a hook: sometime after the mayhem ends in Ghostbusters, The Exorcist, Evil Dead 2, or some other paranormal blockbuster that you watched over and over in the 90's until the VHS wore out, some overworked detective has to come into your town and piece together what the hell happened.

This is his story.

It's a good gag, and the devs wring every drop from it. Existing in a world where these things are commonplace and you have to fit them into some notion of "police procedure" is just funny. Like, it's one thing to have a running gag where you keep observing the moon in outdoor scenes, commenting, with increasing hostility, that its behavior is suspicious (it has been present at multiple crime scenes); it's a slightly different thing when, given the things you've encountered, the moon being the Big Bad is actually somewhat possible.

The game is divided into six main cases and three bonus DLC missions (which come included in the base game now, and the third of which is the proper ending/setup for the sequel). You are the cop tasked to deal with The Other Side - and, when The Other Side bleeds into our own world, its cops have to deal with you. You have a sidekick with a mental maturity of about 6, which I guess makes you the straight man. (You have to grade on a curve to find a straight man in this game.) And you solve tasks like rounding up escaped gremlins or finding an AWOL lake monster all juxtaposed with mundane problems like inter-office squabbles and having not bought your Christmas presents early enough. It's (pleasantly) lo-res and sparsely isolated, so the dialogue and premise do most of the work, but they are ably up to the task.

The gameplay... not so much. I'm an adventure game lifer, so I can put up with a lot of nonsense. It's mostly straightforward inventory puzzles and occasional minigames. Most of the puzzles are fine enough. As the cases progress, things get more involved, and the DLCs especially involve some awful moon logic. And the minigames are not above using that same jumping peg puzzle you've solved in a dozen other games already. So gameplay ranges from serviceable to irritating, but it mostly exists to string together funny lines and silly images. (Christmas mall elves being secretly in service to Krampus - that's the kind of thing we're talking about here.) You won't feel much guilt for opening up a walkthrough; the puzzles aren't why you're here.

The sequel has just been released, and both games are cheap, so check them out if you feel like smiling.

Thoughts on The Procession to Calvary

It's rare for a game to be hilarious to look at.

The Procession to Calvary takes its name from the Bruegel painting. It also takes all it's graphics from Renaissance oil paintings, and the designer delights in making famously rendered heroes and religious icons steal, stab, fart, and swear.

A strong Terry-Gilliam-with-After-Effects vibe is what we're describing.

You play as a lady knight from a war that's just ended, which sucks for you because, in this age of peace, you're no longer authorized to kill. And killing's, like, you're whole thing. But the one person your new, pacifist king wouldn't stop you from killing is the warlord you just deposed, who fled to the South. So you embark on a nonsensical journey to seek out the one human on Earth you are authorized to kill, because killing is just The. Best. Ever.

Of the three games we're discussing, this is the most overtly cheeky, and, at times, the most scatological. I could've done with a bit less scatology, if I'm being honest, but the cheekiness is very winning. As with Lair of the Clockwork God, a lot of jokes could go either way - a field of people being tortured and a woman on a blanket selling commemorative torture merch could be painfully try-hard. But something about the victims being seemingly everyone ever crucified or broken on the wheel in a famous painting, and having them writhe on their crosses in a way that is both gruesome and goofy, and having a cacophonous soundtrack of their screams and moans that you will now imagine every time you look at one of those elegantly elegiac paintings from now on... it works. That the music score is being played by an extremely jaunty piper who dances behind you just out of sword's reach as you traverse the field pushes it over the top.

Oh, and the puzzles, while never hair-pullingly obtuse, will leave you stumped at times. Push past that to get the proper ending, but, if you're sick of trying, you can, at any point, just start stabbing your way through problems. Which, again: it takes a very deft touch to make "protagonist resorts to violence" actually funny rather than lazy and obvious. And maybe, in another game, the perfect timing of every animation, the clever quips, the careful contrast of cathedrals and high-society music halls with gleeful sword-swinging wouldn't be enough. But something about it being frickin' Renaissance paintings carries it the last mile.

This is probably the basest game of the three, but it's also the one that made me giggle the most. Having a BFA that required several art history classes may have something to do with it. But check this thing out.

[lady-star-strings]

About Dream’s Tweets...

To begin with, I’m demisexual and have been part of the community for years - I think I have pretty good credence to speak on this matter. I try not to throw my two cents into situations like this because I can’t stand the ignorant responses of the internet anymore at my age - DeviantArt Dark Ages vet right here - but sometimes I just have to. Whether you agree or not, I could honestly care less, but I would appreciate it if you read everything and gave it some thought before responding, be it positive or negative. With that said, let’s dive in...

At this point, if people are taking the shipping/fanservice jokes and banter between the Dream Team and other creators surrounding them seriously, I don't know what to tell them or really even say, honestly. They've all stated they're not looking to start relationships with each other - multiple times and on-stream/Twitter, might I add, because people keep donating and asking/demanding an answer to both that and about their sexualities - and that it's just messing around with friends. (If we want to talk about making people uncomfortable and being offensive in that regard, don’t you worry because I've got opinions on that too.) Bottom line is, you can't get mad at them for the fan-service now when you supported it before, especially when nothing has changed and they’ve been transparent about how everything actually is.

I understand that some may feel it’s an insensitive and inappropriate thing to do in some regards, and that's perfectly valid, but please don't go mobbing through the town with pitchforks over literal jokes between friends. Keep in mind, they’ve made it clear that’s all it was before people starting jumping down their throats, and still there are groups using their sexuality to attack them over it because "YoU'rE nOt MlM sO yOu CaN't MaKe ThOsE jOkEs, YoU'rE hOmOpHoBiC!!!!!" They're even openly attacking lesbians and bisexuals - whether they agree with them or not - because they're not gay and that somehow renders their words “invalid.” You can't accuse them of being ignorant for messing around as friends because it entertains the fans, and then turn around to attack literally the entire rest of the community for offering their opinions because they aren't valid enough for you in the argument to count - that makes you ignorant. You also can’t claim to be of the opinion that everyone’s sexuality is their own business, but then demand for them not to be ambiguous about it when it pleases you. Honestly, even thinking about people doing that is so incredibly hypocritical that it gives me whiplash.

I completely understand not everyone is a fan of this behavior, but to accuse them of queerbaiting, being homophobic and faking allyship over it all right now is just ridiculous and borderline disgusting to me. They've made it clear they're not romantically interested in one another countless times and that it's just fun between friends because they're super close - they aren't playing the "Am I, or am I not?" game with anyone for gain so no, they're not queerbaiting. Queerbaiting is when it’s not explicitly said at any point whether someone is or isn’t LGBTQIA+ so they can play both the community and conservative side by putting them in ambiguous situations that can lean one way or the other for gain, whether it be monetary or otherwise. Not to mention, if they were really as “homophobic” and “falsely allied” as everyone thinks, why would other LGBTQIA+ creators such as Antfrost, Eret, Scott Major, etc. not only support them, but also consider them friends? Again, I get the offense and hurt people might have taken from this behavior, but your opinions and feelings are ultimately not universal so while they are all valid, that doesn't make them right and the final say on the matter. I don’t mean this to say you’re wrong or inferior in the argument, just that you can’t demand others to see your point of view and abide by it without granting them the same respect. The road goes both ways kiddos, I’m sorry. 

Side note, there's no one to blame but the fans themselves for the jokes and whatnot to have continued on this long because they not only supported it, but also actively encouraged it. It’s been taken so seriously that Dream has outright stated on a stream - and now on Twitter - that he and George aren't together and more than likely never will be because they're honest to goodness just really good friends screwing around. Now if you think you're uncomfortable as part of the community, how do you think they feel being accused every five minutes of being against it because they won’t openly state their sexuality? Not to mention, they can't ever talk about actual relationships or joke about other ships because people will literally send death threats to whoever the other party is because they're "rUiNiNg ThE sHiP" at this point - need I remind you of the Septiplier fiasco? It’s alright if it’s a persona or a personality, but for the love of all things holy, please stop treating people like Barbie dolls that you’re trying to make kiss. They gave us the go-ahead to ship them because it makes us happy and allows us to be creative with the concept - don’t ruin it by trying to force them to play the parts you’ve constructed in your head and then get pissy because they won’t.

Also, it is unbelievably messed up for you to donate money to ask their sexuality and/or for them to tell each other that they love them - which then basically makes it a demand because if they ignore it they get blasted for not responding and “taking their money.” For example, Dream will say he loves any of his friends without issue because he does - just not in the way everyone is assuming or wants - and that's just the type of person he is, but George doesn't like to express it that way and that's okay. He shows his love in other ways that we don't always need to know about or see to make it real, just as it is with anyone else in the world. I don’t know how so many people miss it, but when he gets a donation to tell Dream - or anyone for that matter - he loves him on stream, you can easily tell how uncomfortable it makes him - and yes Dream presses/teases him about it sometimes, but he still drops it and doesn't flame him for it for eternity. Those that donate and chat, on the other hand, will not let it go when he doesn’t say it and continue to pour donations in begging him to say it when he’s already made it clear he won’t. You honestly shouldn't be bribing them to say or do anything through donation because that's beyond messed up and manipulative, especially where these matters are concerned.

And even if they weren't straight - which used to be the case and may have changed by this time, we can’t determine such things nor should we try to - or were in a relationship with each other, it isn't any of your goddamn business to know - no way, no how. What they do offline and out of the public eye isn't anyone's business but their own and people need to respect that, not try to force it out of them or play detective to dox that information for the attention. I mean, if you want a good reason as to why Dream hasn't done a face reveal yet, this is absolutely number one on the list because there will be little to no form of privacy for him after he does and he isn't ready to lose that just yet. I certainly can’t blame him for that considering all that’s been happening to him and his friends as of late, and neither can multiple other creators who hold the same beliefs and fears - ie. CorpseHusband, H20Delirious, Ohmwrecker. No one should have to tip-toe on eggshells in their personal life because fans online don't understand boundaries, that's just cruel and unfair after providing the content and comfort that they do without asking anything but support in return.

At the end of the day, I truly just don't understand how people can join in and support the jokes that they've made clear are purely just messing around, but then turn around and crucify them for the exact same thing later down the road. How can you practically harass them about their sexuality and relationship status through providing monetary means, then go on a witch hunt because they’ve decided to be more private with that information in the present? You can't play both sides and then expect to somehow be right or justified in the situation whichever way the tide turns because, at that point, the only wrong one is you. I completely agree that they need to watch their step with what they say and do sometimes - just as everyone with a strong platform does - but only more so now because people will create a problem the second they do anything that could spin into them being horrible people with too much power.

They’re all still incredibly fresh and new to the realm of social media popularity all things considered, and they reached said popularity startlingly fast so it can’t be easy to adjust to all the attention on everything you say and do. With that said, they’re doing remarkably well so far and I have faith that they’re going to continue to learn and grow in this arena given the time. They might mess up and make mistakes - already have, in fact - but that’s part of the gig and you can’t always please or satisfy everyone, so the best you can do is acknowledge your faults and move forward. You can’t demand someone’s head on a pike when they’ve made an effort to right things and it wasn’t good enough for everyone, it’s just not a fair standard to hold anyone to. In that same vein, you also can’t demand whatever you want out of them with the excuse that they owe it to you as a fan - you’re not a fan in any way, shape or form when you play that card, and you need to either shape up or ship out if you're doing that.

If you don't support it and/or don't like it, just don't follow or watch them anymore, it’s truly as simple as that. You can't continue to watch and support them as a “fan” while also touting how ignorant and horrible they are as detractors, that's just not how it works - pick one or the other and stop attacking them and those that don’t agree with you. They’re only on year one of their careers and the amount of people trying to “cancel” and tear them down over things that really aren't issues already is ridiculous, you aren't the righteous keyboard warriors you think you are and it's things like this that are ruining the internet for everyone, not just you.

That’s all I have to say on the matter and will continue to say going forward - sorry if you came here looking for my usual nonsense, but I really felt this needed to be said and addressed. I usually try not to do these sort of rants, however, this is a serious matter and a discussion that we as a community have been needing to have for a while, so now’s as good a time as any.

So, with my peace being given and my two cents thoroughly tossed, why don’t we focus on the bigger issues with YouTube such as their blatant ignorance of pedophilia and copyright abuse? Those seem like a much bigger problems to address at this point in time since that effects creators and fans as a whole - both in the present and the future - don’t you think?

[chayacat]

Devil’s Sweet Star (43)

Fandom: Dead by Daylight

Ghostface x Female Reader  

Rated M for Violence, Language and Smut  

***

A lot of things happened last night, a lot of revelation especially, the whole thing having been concluded by a... wild night. You could feel aches everywhere, it must be said that you did not go slowly, you and Jed... I mean Danny. It will take you some time to accept this reality. All this time, this dear Jed, this boy who seemed shy, adorable and very concerned about the others, was actually the one who at night, was going to commit murders, but also come to see you, under the name of Ghostface.  It will take you time, but you will still have to adapt quickly. Because only one misstep and Only God knows what Danny will do to you.

You were still in bed together. You felt aches and pains along your body, and it's no wonder, with the beast sleeping next to you. He was wilder than when he was Jed. much wilder. He was turned towards you, his hair scattered all over his pillow, his face peaceful. You gently release a strand of hair from his face which made him react. And without having time to realize it, you find yourself glued to him, his arms blocking you like a child who hugs his teddy bear tightly. Luckily, you're not working today. But you still want to get up. You try to get out of your way but all you get is Danny's grunts and a slightly tighter embrace.

“Hmmm... stop moving.” Said Danny grumbling a little.

“You are slightly crushing me against you. And I want to get up.” you respond.  

“Why? You don't work today, if I remember correctly.”

“Yeah, but I can’t stay in bed all day. Come on Danny...”

Danny grumbled again, letting you get up before complaining even more when he heard his phone ring. He got up, before taking the latter and looking at who dared to disturb him so early. It was his boss Mr Hembrook. You could notice that a twisted smile appeared on his face, as if he already knew why his boss was calling him. And in a sense... you also have your little idea about it.  

“Hello? In 20min? Yes of course Sir why?... Are you serious? Yes, yes, I go there right now. Okay, he's going to be happy to see me... You too sir. Good bye.” said Danny before hanging up the phone and looking at you with a wide smile.  

“What did he want?” you ask even if you already knew the answer.  

“Wilhelm is at Hoggins' villa... they have just found his body. And my boss wants me to go there to get some information. And help Wilhelm if possible.”

“I suspected it a little. You must be proud, all this time you made everyone believe that it was Hoggins who killed McKellan and made up everything to make it look like a Ghostface murder... and there... You literally turned everyone's brain upside down.”

“That's what it's like to be me. I have had plenty of time to improve since my first murder. I made mistakes, adapted my modus operandi according to the situation, and I created my own signature. I confess that I didn't really like attributing MY McKellan's murder to Hoggins, but I had to draw attention to him. In addition, this moron brought me everything I wanted on a silver platter.”

“You mean everything you found on Hoggins was true?” you replied surprised.  

“Honey, I am a criminal, but I am a journalist first and foremost. Everything I found and showed you on Hoggins is true. I can't really have fun falsifying documents that need to be published in the newspaper. Otherwise, my boss will suspect something. No one fools him so easily.” He responds before getting up and head to the wardrobe to pick up clean clothes.

“In this case I come with you.”

“Oh? Do you want to see in what state I left this bastard? You know that curiosity is an ugly flaw... but if you insist, I'm not going to say no. And that way you can reassure yourself about his death.”

You both have breakfast quickly; you get dressed and Danny took his bag that contained his journalist's belongings. You could see in his office another bag, surely the one in which he put his Ghostface’s outfit and others. You leave the apartment to get into Danny's van, setting off for Hoggins' house. It's going to be weird to go back there for a murder, when that's where the reception was held. An unforgettable evening. During the ride, you discussed everything and nothing as if it were one of your usual days. Once he arrived in front of the hoggins' house, Danny parked, turned off the engine and took your arm before you went down.

“Remember what was said last night. For everyone, I am Jed. So, no missteps, otherwise... I would be obliged to make you assimilate them... in a less diplomatic way. Oh, and try to pretend you don't know anything. Let us avoid drawing attention to ourselves.” He said before letting you go.  

You leave the vehicle and join Wilhelm in Hoggins' office where his corpse is. When you arrive in the room, a vision of horror, and a desire to vomit, took you. You turn your head by refraining from vomiting, indeed, we can say that Hoggins is dead. Danny has accomplished his little revenge with perfection. The latter was talking with Wilhelm explaining the reasons for your presence. After all, in the eyes of the law, you are a civilian, and civilians do not have to be at the crime scene.

“Are you okay Miss? If you want to vomit, you have the toilet which is just the room after from the left. Anyway, the owner of the house is no longer able to do or say anything against you.” Said Wilhelm looking at you.  

“Yes... Thank you.” you simply respond.

“Well... we can say that he was more than creative this time. I knew he had imagination but here, it's too much for me.” Said Danny.  

“The worst thing is that this bastard leaves a little note. He was the one who killed McKellan! he used Hoggins as a scapegoat. Goddamnit !” replied Wilhelm, hitting the wall next to him.  

“It cannot be said that Hoggins was a saint... there was quite a bit of evidence against him too. I think that Ghostface knew this and that he used it. This guy is always spying on his victims...”

“This is not wrong Olsen... this is not wrong. In the meantime, I thought I could end McKellan's murder, and in the end, not only it’s not the case, but I also find myself with Hoggins' murder on my hands! I'm going to smash that dirty little asshole if I catch him!”

You see Danny making a discreet but sneaky smile behind Wilhelm, something you shake your head slightly at. He had done this not only to take revenge, but also to make fun of Wilhelm. You wanted to hit him on the shoulder, but it would be useless. what is done... is done. And then, like Danny told you earlier, it's better to avoid attention on both of you.

“He literally crucified him. And turn that cross over to make him a demon. It’s really twisted. Maybe a follower of religion? One of these... Satanists? In a sense it would not surprise me. Given all the blood he sheds.” said Wilhelm.  

“Maybe... or maybe not. That's the problem with Ghostface, he knows everything about everyone, but nobody knows anything about him.” said Danny.  

“I find it strange ... he seems to appreciate you well Miss. Because all those who tried to harm you are dead.” Replied Wilhelm, looking at you.  

You look at the two men, not knowing what to answer. Danny made you understand that you had to quickly find an excuse or something to say. Otherwise, suspicions will arise on you. It was inevitable and real, Danny killed everyone who got too close to you and threatened you. Think pickle brains, think!  

“Great...as if McKellan and Hoggins hadn't been so... horrible, I had to attract the most twisted murderer in the city.” you respond, faking an annoying face.  

“All we have to do now is know why. it's not like you've been living here for a long time, and Ghostface had started his murders long before you arrived. But here, it seems that he is tired of attacking small fish, he wants to catch the bigger ones.” said Wilhelm looking at the reverse cross.

“Go find out what big fish he's going to attack next time... Me... You... or the mayor.” said Danny, taking notes.  

Wilhelm and Danny exchanged a look that meant everything. A cold settled in the room. Don’t forget that these two men do not get along at the base... If you didn't understand why with "Jed", now that you know the reality of things, with Danny, it didn't surprise you in the end. Still, be as close to the one who wants to capture you... you really have to be twisted to play so much with fire. Both took notes, observations of the crime scene, and recorded hypotheses about what might have happened.

It was demoralizing to see how Danny was making fun of Wilhelm, knowing himself that he’s the perpetrator of this murder. He knew how to lie, that's for sure. You were sure that he convinced himself of his own lies. After a few hours, you and Danny end up leaving the scene, Danny "promising" to notify the inspector if he ever had any information. On the way back, you look at Danny pouting like a child unhappy that he didn't have an ice cream.

“What?” Danny finally said.  

“You should be given the medal for the best liar in the world. And the best actor too. You act as if nothing had happened and you provoke the inspector without thinking that there will be no consequences or that he will not suspect you by saying this.” you respond.

“Ha ha I know Honey I know. I was born with this talent as an actor. It's innate in me. And the same can be said of you.”

“Except that compared to you it doesn't make me happy to lie to people. And I pray that no one will ever discover the truth.”

“Oh, you can. Because if it happens... I'd know where it came from.” replied Danny.  

You take a lunch break to eat, as usual, at the park and then around 1pm, you quickly stop at the newspaper, while Danny aka "Jed" or "Jeddy" according to Mattew, reports to his boss. It was fun to see the locals where Danny was working, you were the first "civilian" to go inside, at least to go up to the office. Usually, when you deliver the cakes for the newspaper, it’s the security guards who take care of receiving the packages.

Mr. Hembrook greeted you warmly it was the first time he smiled like this. From what Danny told you, he wasn't the type to joke about, he was someone very serious about his job. But, outside, no one knows how he is. After a few hours of discussion about the article to be published on Hoggins, a discussion in which you took part, you both leave the Roseville Gazette’s building and get back in the van.

“So? What do we do now?” you ask.  

“Well normally tonight I had planned to... find a new victim. Or start this article. But you see, I don't want to. I want to spend a quiet evening, without work, without murder, just you and me. So... What would you say about a short trip to Zanesville just you and me? there are many more things to do than here.” Danny said with a bright smile.  

“Oh, you're doing a rebellious teenage crisis again? the one who only wants to have fun and nothing else?”  

“Ha ha. Really funny. I may have been a model student, but I knew how to have fun. Okay, so? it's yes or no, Miss Rainbow...” replied Danny chuckling.

“Hey! You promised me to not call me that.” you respond, hitting him in the arm.  

“Correction, JED promised you to not call you that anymore. Not me. So?”

“...Fine. But promise me to tell anyone about that.” you said sighing before laughing.  

Danny restarted the van and set off for Zanesville. The road was made in music, and even being himself, Danny still had the same musical tastes than when he was Jed. Indeed, Zanesville has more to offer in terms of entertainment than Roseville. A big city has everything, but it will never replace the tranquillity of a peaceful small town. You looked through the window at the various shops, restaurants, libraries, and even the arcades! there were also shops that sold CDs and films. Basically, there was everything, in addition to grocery stores and small supermarkets.

“Ready to have fun?” asks Danny.  

“Ready!” You respond smiling.  

I hope for you that you know how to hold out until late... very late. Because there, with Danny... you're not ready to go to bed anytime soon. Oh no you're going to be awake all night. Let the party begin!

Until your body lets you go.  

***

(I think I'm at my... 6/7 run of Road 96 and I still never get tired of it! the good thing about this game is that each road is unique, even if we know the different answers we can give, we can create multiple situations that can lead either to our arrest, our death, or our freedom. It's a game with a gripping story and also very endearing characters. Well, I must admit that Zoe now... as soon as I see her, I want to kick her in the head. She's not a bad character, and I know she doesn't do it voluntarily, but she always puts us in danger every time we meet her. And after a while it's just irritating. I hope you’ll like this chapter like the other ones! Well, it's time for my brain to rest! Have a great weekend to you all!  See ya! )

[tortoisenotturtle]

Am I the only one who likes seeing muscular women in media more than muscular men?

Alright so, this one will probably end up much shorter and a little more ranty than I'd like, but this is kind of personal so be fairly warned. 

 Recently I've seen a few complaints about the new He-Man show and honestly, I fully understand and empathize with them. Whilst I haven't fully seen the show, from what I've viewed I can personally speaking agree (or at the very least understand) where most criticisms come from. I think it's incredibly shitty that the writer basically lied to his audience about how the show would run. Now normally I'd be fine with a twist such as He-man dying, but he's an important part of the show and the way the marketing & merchandising for it was running kind of comes across as him basically using He-Man's name to get people into the show. I also feel like it's fine to view Teela as obnoxious and annoying, nothing about her personality-wise seems likable to me. I also heard a few complaints about Orko's (I think that's his name, don't crucify me) backstory and how his character was handled.Yet as the title suggests one that didn't stick with me was the criticism of Teela and a general trend towards the criticism of women in media as being "masculine". 

I've heard over and over that Hollywood representing strong women by giving them masculine traits is a bad thing and yet... I kind of don't get it? It feels odd to say, almost like I'm the dumbest man alive for admitting something which most people on the internet seem to be so sure about, yet I just don't understand where this is coming from. I've seen this thrown at She-hulk, Wonder Woman, Abby, and many other characters, yet when inquired it usually loops back around to, "Yeah they have muscles", and that's about it. This type of criticism in specific seems to overly focus on the appearance of said characters. It's the one critique I just can't get behind and it feels like at best it's a shallow criticism that fails to get its point across, and at worst it's actively demeaning to women who desire to or show masculine traits. But first, let me break this down into sections.

Section 1: Muscles =/= Masculinity (In my opinion at least)

Oh boy, I feel like this is a section that might rustle some feathers, but I'm going to try and explain myself best as possible. I simply do not view muscularity as a feature that is inherent to or should be inherent to men. I'm not going to pretend as if muscular men aren't more saturated in media and art, nor as if they're societally treated as masculine, but one of the reasons I fail to understand this criticism is that I see muscles beyond the horizons as being just a masculine trait. 

I believe that muscles should instead be seen as a sign of hard work and determination. As someone who's currently trying (and struggling) to stay healthy and fit, it's much harder than a lot of media portrays it to be. It's a test where you push yourself to the limits, not just for the sake of doing it, but so you can improve as a person. Whenever I go to the gym and see a muscular gal or guy walk by, my immediate thought isn't, "how masculine" or anything like that my thought is, "wow! They worked hard to get like that, I should work hard as well!". 

This interpretation tends to feel like it's just simply taking a piss on people who actively work hard to achieve higher levels of strength. Especially when society places and enforces these unrealistic standards onto people. If you don't have a six-quintillion pack nor can bench press a fucking house then you're worthless, of course, that is unless you actually attempt to pursue said standards which in that case you're automatically dismissed as cheating your way to gaining your muscles instead of putting any work in. And that's just for men who often don't have to deal with traditional idiots who are stuck in the year 1950 where I can't walk on the same street as them. My skin crawls when reading tweets from older men talking about how weightlifting women are "ruining their fertility" and I absolutely hate it when people in my life treat these women as if they're mythical creatures from a fairy tale, or when females who have trained to such a degree are simply dismissed as being inferior. 

Obviously, I don't think the people who say this are like that, but whenever I hear this type of critique I can't help but think of the culmination of all these experiences I've gone through. But then again, this might honestly just be because I'm personally attracted to muscular women.

  Section 2: Body type diversity

  Another reason that I tend to like muscular women in media over muscular men is simply due to the sheer oversaturation of muscular men. Don't get me wrong, I have no problem if anybody likes muscular men. I totally get wanting to shove your face in between some man titties or get inspired by their physiques. In all honesty, almost everything I said earlier can directly apply to men, but one of the reasons I bring up body type diversity is that there tend to be much less muscular women than men. I

f anything, I'd have to say that muscular men are almost treated as the default when it comes to things like superhero comics, movies, video games, anime, etc. In a similar vein, the default for women tends to be slim and curvaceous, you get the drill. Whenever someone who doesn't fit into either body type shows up and isn't treated like a joke/gag or a character to rip on, I can't help but be happy about it. As much as I have no clue wtf is going on with TLOU2, I can appreciate that Abby's portrayal doesn't seem to exist solely as a joke meant to demean women for working out. I'm excited when an anime protagonist is a fat character who can go beyond just being a "fat guy" and is treated the same way a normal person would be.

 Regardless of what you think about whatever trait you're criticizing, there's probably someone out there who fits it. If you're not into it or dislike it, then that's fine, but I'd rather have that expressed than it being actively made out as a harmful trope as opposed to just literally another body type that some women have.

  Section 3: Muscular women inspire me more

Ok so, we've now blown into a full-on personal experience, buckle up boys, girls, NBs, anything in between, and I feel like I'm forgetting someone so apologies! But yeah, muscular women in media tend to be a lot more inspiring than people seem to give them credit for. This comes down to a mix of both the qualities I outlined earlier in what makes the characters inspiring but also plays into the idea of body diversity. 

One of the traits that make amazons seem more inspiring is their inherent rarity/lack of screentime. As I stated earlier, whilst I do enjoy my fair share of man-titties, it kind of gets to a point where it's more depressing than inspiring when all you see is just super-models shoved in your face whenever you walk into a theater. If for every Goku I could find ten other guys who were on the chubbier side then I'd be able to take more from when I see Goku and other characters with his body type, yet it's so saturated that it no longer becomes something to aspire to, but simply the norm.  It's not that you can work to become muscular or skinny with hard work and effort, you have to be muscular or skinny unless you want to be deemed a failure. Being chubby often isn't presented as a starting point but just treated as a defect. As someone who spent years battling with my own self-perception, that's just not a good message to get across.

Now, this obviously isn't to say that people can never make muscular characters. After all, it's their story so they can put whatever they want in it. The aim of the game isn't to stop people from making a specific type of character, but to encourage a diverse set of people to make a diverse set of characters. This is the reason why I view muscular women as so inspiring. Instead of coming across as just "the norm" or "the standard" they stand out from the crowd and despite knowing what they have to deal with, are still ready and willing to work out and improve their bodies. They had a goal in mind and set time aside to achieve said goal, that's something I can get behind.

  Conclusion:

This will be another short section, but I just wanted to mention it because it caps off my thoughts on this post in general. What originally started as me just not getting the reason why people disliked Teela's design somehow turned into a passionate rant and I'm A) not sure if it fits on this particular subsection of the community, B) scared I'm going to get ripped to pieces, and C) somewhat unsatisfied with all that I said. At the end of the day, this probably won't be seen by too many people, but to those who do see it, I hope you have a wonderful day. I just wanted to talk about something that was near and dear to my heart and hoped that I made it clear why I view things the way I do. 

P.S: Can we stop having this double standard where we act like women whose arms show the slightest hint of definition are "unrealistic" whilst men can look like tree trunks and be considered normal and healthy? please and thank you!

[moved-attre]

Rewriting Cyberpunk 2077 into a bullet point list! LET’S GO!

(Disclaimer: I’m trying to be realistic. So no, “every single detail of the game changes based upon every single choice V makes” but just things I expected in an RPG from an AAA company in 2020. I take a lot of inspiration from the old trailers, and rumors of pre-2018 development.)

And this is really long, too. Sorry. 😜

Okay, so first off: Act 1 generally goes off the same as it does in canon. I’m open to other ideas, but I don’t think it’s a bad starting point. I do think V and Jackie should have had more time together, doing smaller jobs until Dex calls. Like, there should’ve been side jobs that were only available in Act 1. You have to get a minimum of 5 street cred before you get the conversation with Jackie about Dex.

The heist still goes to shit; Yorinobu kills his father, Takemura rebels against him and Arasaka factions split. V inserts the chip into their head, Jackie still dies and Dex shoots V in the head. Takemura rescues V, kills Dex, V wakes up in Vik’s and is told they have 4 months to live. (2 weeks is not enough!)

On to Act 2! The origins actually affect the game, so there’s three versions of it you can play. (Some things happen regardless of the origin, though.) For example: Corpo V has contacts in the Corpo world and pursues leads about the Relic there through their old friends. Street Kid V has contacts in the gangs, like the Valentinos or Maelstrom, who have dirty dealings with corporations and can get V in on Arasaka knowledge, Nomad V has leads out in the badlands about the corporations and gets in that way, hijacking transports to get some info. All origins can work with the corporations (like Hanako’s branch of Arasaka, Militech, Biotechnia, etc.) or against them. Like, the point is to snoop around the corporations and dig up some dirt on the Relic and Yorinobu’s Arasaka branch specifically but each origin goes about it differently?

Maelstrom vs Meredith Stout choice actually matters. It’s one point in a subplot I mentioned above, where V continually makes choices on whether they’re gonna side with the corporations or the gangs/people of NC against Arasaka in order to be rid of the Relic. Also affects V’s relationship with Johnny. You can also have a real, long term relationship with Meredith if you pick her side and get Militech support, or count on Maelstrom to help you in the main plot against Arasaka. Both sides will still attack V if they poke their nose in, meaning random encounters can still happen.

^ The subplot is like, making a deal with the devils (The corpos) or... other devils (The gangs). One person objectively could say one is better than the other, but they’re both awful. Night City is kind of rotten to the core, and V’s problems can’t be fixed by a pursuit of justice. V can still be a good person in either case, and it’s still kept kind of punk by going against the head honchos. I think this more suits the “Wake the fuck up, Samurai. We have a city to burn.” quote because V is churning up a path to the top, even if their methods are purely selfish. V themselves can be uninterested in righting wrongs, but they kind of turn NC on its head by challenging Arasaka so changes come anyway.

Point, is you fuck everything up either way. THEN, V can choose whether to trust the corporations and work with Hanako to “change the system from within” without disrupting people’s day-to-day lives (short term good choice I suppose?) or to let the gangs rise up and cause total anarchy. (long term good? since the downtrodden are rising up and maybe there shouldn’t be absolute power in the hands of a few.)

T-Bug doesn’t die. V thinks she’s dead, but sometime in Act 2 gets an anonymous call and meets up with T-Bug. She went underground after the botched heist, and isn’t eager to work with V again. Maybe you do a few missions with her, and she comes around? Or you fuck up and never hear from her again. I imagine she’d love to poke around at the Relic, if V helps her.

Giving Jackie’s body to Vik has real consequences. If you give his body to his mother, you attend the ofrenda and get his bike, his mom allows you to use his den as a place to stay... It’s basically the ‘good’ choice, if you care about the characters. If you give his body to Vik, you unlock a side mission where Arasaka steals his body to find the relic. You have to go and find it but it was destroyed(?) at some point by Arasaka. You can get his pistols (Which are, aside from Johnny’s pistol, the best weapons in the game. I don’t get why they aren’t in canon...) in this route and whole lotta angst, so his mom basically hates you because she blames you for not being able to bury her son and the bar is off limits. No getting the bike, either.

More content involving Alt Cunningham. V still witnesses the scene with her and Johnny, her kidnapping and death. But, Ghost AI Alt allows V to look into Alt’s memories for information on Mikoshi. V accidentally accesses some more personal memories. We can see Alt as more of a fleshed out actual person, not just a tragic backstory for Johnny. Some of the memories do involve Johnny, and the tone is very different from her perspective. We see that Alt has genuine affection for him, but Johnny is possessive and abusive... It’s far from the relationship Johnny recalls. Of course, Johnny can see all this too since he lives in V’s head. He and V have a heart to heart afterwards, with Johnny realising how badly he treated Alt and yeah. I wasn’t satisfied with how Alt was just used as a sob story for Johnny, but I was sent an ask by an anonymous person about how the memory was from his perspective and thus biased. It really got me thinking! If I was more creative, I’d come up with a way for Alt to live... But Johnny still needs to bomb Arasaka and Alt’s death was the reason why he did that.

You have to return one of your apartments/safe houses every few days to wash and sleep. If not, V will get a penalty that means they are less accurate when aiming and slower when breaking in a vehicle. Also some NPC’s will refuse to talk to you if you don’t bathe, because... stinky.

And you have to eat! Otherwise you get hungry, and get penalties for that too. Can’t concentrate on an empty stomach. I’d say eating once or twice a day would be enough.

Instead of fast travel points (that are supposed to be taxi services, I think...? But we never see a taxi! And why can’t we just call Del? Ugh.), V takes the metro. There are side missions that can sometimes only start once you get on or off of a train. (You meet NPC’s in the train, or waiting for one.)

Takemura and Johnny are romance options, and are available for all genders. They’re the most difficult to romance, with some (kind of obvious) dialogue choices ending the possibility. Like, for example: Takemura’s romance ends badly if you choose to go against the corporations, and Johnny’s ends badly if you go with the corporations. It’s the same with Meredith, essentially, in that going against her won’t allow you to romance her. I know a rival-mance system is possible, but I think that might be too complicated.

Takemura and V’s relationship is much, much deeper. They have more time together, and grow closer. Takemura trains V in combat, and takes over from Coach Fred in the street fights side missions. You go with Takemura to fights, he’s your coach, is very proud when you win. (He’s basically training V in the event that they have to take on Adam Smasher and Oda. Like, why did we have no training montages with Takemura?!) V is able to choose romance or stay friends with him. There’s plenty more missions with Takemura too, mainly espionage stuff against Yorinobu. Finding out his weaknesses, replacing his staff with people that are loyal to Hanako, digging for dirt on him. Lots of stake outs, hehe. 😉 Romance!™️ Also makes it that much more tragic if V doesn’t choose to trust the corporations, since Takemura will end things and leave NC.

There are garages to upgrade your cars but Panam can upgrade it further if you do her missions + befriend her, and you can find super secret parts for your cars that Panam needs all around NC by stealing them from gangs or Corpos! Like, make your car go 200 mph fast or a setting to make it hover. 😎

FOUND FAMILY TROPE... Involving the LI’s + more characters. I wanted Misty, Vik, Judy, Panam, River and Kerry to all know each other and be friends. Also, somewhere for them to hang out. Judy coming down and hanging out with Misty and Vik would’ve been so cool.

Missions involving Vik. I think he deserved his own personal missions. Also, he’s gotta be romanceable! I’ll add more to this later.

I’m still figuring out how Johnny’s romance would go. It’s a tricky one. Lots of tension, jealously if V flirts with anybody... Heart to hearts... Holding hands... Passive aggressive confessions of love...

River is introduced in the main story. Maybe you team up to hunt down somebody who knows stuff about the Relic, like Anders Hellman, or something else to do with it. River’s like “What the fuck is going on?” but V doesn’t really tell him. Then, of course, you meet him later on and recognise him in the BD given to you by Jefferson.

Meeting Kerry earlier in the story, say mid Act 2? Ideally there would have been 5 Acts, and maybe I’ll edit this to include more once I figure out how the story could have gone. AND he’s part of the main story.

Less generic, “get in, get item and get out” side missions from Fixers and more side missions like the Peralez’s and that guy who got crucified. More freaky Cyberpunk subjects like what constitutes a soul, what is “intelligence” (What makes a machine different than a human? Without shitty false racism analogies), human rights abuses (and in that: classism, racism, ableism, transphobia), pollution, more on “Cyberpsychos” and how harmful that term is, etc. Nauced and thought-provoking. Reminding us that this is a dystopia and the issues are different but not all that wildly so from today. I would’ve developed Brendan’s mission more, because it seemed like we were going to see an earnest discussion on Artificial Intelligence but instead it was just confusing and “Haha, tricked you!” 🥱 Like, what if he really was a person capable of free thought and emotion? And that company still owns him and can overwrite him? Isn’t that fucked up?! It didn’t need a happy ending, just something to unnerve me.

Adding to that, Delamain had plenty of opportunities to discuss AI and the rights of individual contructs. His “children” could be freed, but nothing really happens as a result? I wanted consequences! The emails about human staff being made redundant because of Delamain were so interesting, too. I wanted to see something about the consequences of that in a city with no basic universal income. What happened to them? What can be done to help people who are made redundant by machines? So many possibilities for truly emotional and scary side missions!

I’m gonna watch black mirror for more inspiration, but stuff like the IRL blocking feature? Freaky as hell and totally plausible. Would’ve loved if one of the side missions involved V getting involved in some dispute involving something like that. “I can’t see his face!” or the copyright stuff about people’s appearances! Imagine if there was a Johnny lookalike? Engram Johnny would either find it hilarious or get really pissed off.

I’m hoping the DLC will deliver on more Takemura, so I’ll hold my breath for critiquing the Arasaka ending.

More to come! I’ll probably edit this later, if there’s any mistakes and/or I realise I hate an idea hehe.

[manatehispants]

Look For A Savior

Summary:

This is an AU story of the events which took place for Gabriel during the second series of the Lucifer comic.

"I've been looking for a savior in these dirty streets . Looking for a savior beneath these dirty sheets. I've been raising up my hands, drive another nail in, got enough guilt to start my own religion."

- Crucify by Tori Amos

When one thinks of the Archangel Gabriel many images come to the mind. For some an image of untouchable pureness and holiness beyond all measures is what comes fourth to their mind. For others they see what they assume to be their only hope at salvation from their sins and the evils of this world. Still for others the mere mention of God's Messenger brings fear to them. For when they think of him they are reminded of the horrors which God can unleash when he is angered. Then there are some still who would smile with fondness over hearing his name because to when they think of him, they see a being that is more glorious and beautiful than Earthly words can ever hope to describe. For none would image of a bitter, drunken disgraced son come to their mind. Yet that is exactly what has become of the once proud Archangel.

If you asked your average human where they thought Gabriel was they would laugh a bit before answering that he was in Heaven with all the Holy Host. Perhaps they would tell you he was besides God awaiting his orders. Waiting to deliver his next message. This answer once would have been true. Yet now-a-days things had greatly changed. No longer did Gabriel speak to his Father and no longer did he spend his time in the magnificent Silver City. In fact he wasn't allowed anywhere near the Silver City any longer. Twice in the last four years he had been casted out of Heaven. Not that he much gave a shit about that anymore. Fuck the Silver City and all of the Heavenly Host for that matter. They didn't want him around? Well, he wasn't about to keep trying to force his company on them and try to fix what was an unrepairable situation. If he couldn't be a blessing to Heaven.....He would become their curse. He would make them wish that they had never ever demeaned him in the ways which they had done so.

It was with this bitter and rage clouding his mind that he went seeking out Mazikeen (Hell's newest ruler). She had once told him in the future he would join Hell and become one of her most trusted loyal soldiers. At the time Gabriel had assumed she was purely saying this derisions to cause him dismay and attempt to get a rise out of him. After all she was still a demon and wasn't that what demons did best? Didn't she even go as far to do this to Lucifer at times? A man whom she claimed to respect more than anyone. Although of course knowing Lucifer he probably got off in some sick and twisted way on Mazikeen taunting him. Not that Gabriel spent much time thinking on that. The less time thinking about any of his family the better. Never did God’s Ex-Messenger think there would be the slightest hint of truth to the demoness’ words. Yet in the end her words which he had took for taunts had ended up becoming his unavoidable reality.

Willingly the once proud Angel went to the ruler of Hell. He kneeled before her, lowered his head and asked for her to allow him to become her servant. A cold smile had crept onto the visible side of Mazikeen’s face as she granted Gabriel his plea. Gabriel was sure that after the deal had been made he would regret it and he would feel terribly for having entered into such a bargain. He was sure that guilt over betraying all of Heaven would quickly overwhelm him. This proved not to be the case. The moment Mazikeen’s hand touched his head finalizing their agreement, the fallen angel felt for the first time in years now that he had done something right. He finally felt like he was now able to do something about all his anger and bitterness that had been building up. He once again felt his life had some sense of direction and maybe even the slightest bit of meaning to it.

Gabriel had gone to Hell and made this deal assuming Mazikeen was going to make his life miserable. He had figured she would gloat about having been right on him joining her. That she would mock him for his fall as so many did when they learned what had become of him. Much to his amazement she hadn't done any of that. Mazikeen was almost in her own way kind to him. She kept him close by her side while being careful to give him what space he may need. Mazikeen listened when he spoke or she acted as if she was. This was more than could be said of his Father in recent times. Still, this proved not to be the most shocking thing about Hell's new ruler. Gabriel had quickly come to learn that Mazikeen was a much different ruler than Lucifer had been.

Lucifer had always been bored by his job. He didn't never give a damn about it as far as Gabriel could gather. Mazikeen gave off the impression of someone who cared about being the best ruler she could be. She also cared a great deal about the beings she ruled. Sure if someone so much as gave off the tiniest hint that they might be thinking of displeasing her, Mazikeen would not hesitate to personally destroy said being. Still, she also had a very protective streak to her over the ones she ruled. It was clear that the demoness would not stand for any disrespect whatsoever from her followers. It was equally clear that she would defend each and every last one of them till her dying breath against that would dare stand against them.

Never in all of his billions of years of being would Gabriel ever think he would say this but, he was quickly growing to respect Mazikeen. Sure, there were times he still didn't agree with her and certain she said or did still made him feel ill at times. Nonetheless the respect remained there and grew with each day. Despite this new found respect there was still so much he didn't understand about her. The biggest thing he didn't get was this, now that Lucifer had shown back up why did she keep insisting on ruling this place? Why not give Lucifer his stupid Lightbringer powers back and call it a day? Lucifer had even stood before Mazikeen and damn near begged her to do this. So why hadn't she? Gabriel glanced to his side where Mazikeen sat in typical fashion on the throne of Hell. A seat once occupied by Gabriel's older brother. He frowned uncertainly as Mazikeen gazed over at him and raised an eyebrow.

"If you have something on your mind then speak, angel. Surely even you know that staring at people is considered rude."

Mentally the disgraced angel rolled his eyes. Mazikeen really did have an attitude much like Lucifer when she wanted to. Shoving his hands into his pockets Gabriel spoke up.

"Why do you this? I mean really.....What's the point in this? You don't seem happy about ruling Hell as good as you are at. Lucifer is back. Why not give him back the powers and be done with this? As much as he may deny it Hell is still his responsibility isn't it? Make him deal with this."

A long silence followed Gabriel's questions. For a moment he wasn't sure she was going to answer him. He thought she might just attack him. After what was starting to feel like a life time the Queen Of Hell spoke.

"I do this because as you said I am good at it. Hell no longer has anything to do with your brother. He gave up on this long before he left here. I will not do the same. I will not run off from my responsibilities and I will not abandon the ones who depend on me as he has done to me. I keep these powers as a reminder of what was done to me."

Gabriel narrowed his eyes at Mazikeen. Despite what some may say he wasn't a complete fool. He knew there was much more to the story than she was saying. As much as she claimed to no longer need Lucifer and to be angry with him, she still loved him. He was as sure of this as he was sure that Lucifer too still loved her. Mazikeen once more arched an eyebrow at the Archangel.

"What? Are you disappointed by my answer? Had you been hoping for some mind blowing and life changing answer from this all?"

Gabriel shook his head, his dark hair brushing up against the top of his eyelids as he did so.

"No. Forget it, stupid question."

Ebony feathered wings extended from Gabriel's back as he started to take to the air. Mazikeen's face went back to being impossible to read as she watched him with but a hint of boredom.

"And where is it you're planning to go now?"

Gabriel was already a good hundred yards in the air. He shouted over his shoulder to her as he kept making his exit from the throne room and now Hell itself.

"You know perfectly well where I am going. Where I always go now-a-days. To get a damn drink."

God's ex-Messenger could swear for a second as he made his exit that he heard Mazikeen laughing at his words. This would make most reconsider that drink but for Gabriel this only made him want a drink more. Gabriel headed to a run down bar in the heart of Los Angles a few blocks from where Lucifer had his own bar. Gabriel had considered for a briefly going into Lux (or was Lucifer still calling it Ex-Lux?) but he then thought better of this idea. If he went there he would end up having to talk to Lucifer who would either worsen his mood by mocking him over something or rope into some fucked up scheme. This would also only worsen his mood.

So, if he didn't want to see his brother why go to Los Angeles at all? Why risk a run in with someone who would surely piss him off? Maybe somewhere along the lines Gabriel had become one of those sick freaks who got off on life being shitty. No, if that was really the case he would still be trying to prove himself to Heaven and arguing with them over things. Maybe the truth was something much more simple. Perhaps some small part of him wanted to run into Lucifer because Lucifer was one of only handful who still treated him half way decent at times even if the ex-Morningstar was an asshole. Plus there was the fact that unlike most Lucifer understood what it was like to have once been favored by Heaven only to later have them hate you.

As thoughts of his elder brother clouded his mind, Gabriel frowned. No, he didn't want to see him. Lucifer didn't understand shit. Unlike Gabriel, Lucifer had never wanted any part of Heaven. He had never cared about pleasing Father, about being pure, or anything other than his own damn selfish desires and that still was all the man cared about. Frowning, the Archangel sat himself down at the bar. He raised his hand slightly to get the bartend's attention.

"So what will it be?"

The bartender asked as he approached Gabriel and leaned himself slightly over the counter top. Gabriel frowned. He really shouldn't be drinking at all. Lucifer last time he was at Lux had took notice of his drinking and if even the devil is has words to say about how much you drink you really know you got problems. Fuck it. Who the Hell gave a damn what Lucifer or anyone else thought anyways?

"Doesn't matter to me so long as it is strong and you keep them coming."

Gabriel remarked as he took his wallet out and set some money on the countertop. For a brief moment the bartender looked as if he was going to argue with the disgraced angel. Maybe even go as far as to attempt to talk him out of drinking. However one look at Gabriel was enough to tell the bartender nothing he might say was going to change Gabriel's mind on getting drunk at this point. The bartender shrugged, got out a whiskey glass and filled it. Keeping his gaze on the fallen Archangel he pushed the drink over to him.

"Rough day, buddy?"

The bartender asked in a rather thick New York accent that had some level of concern etched into it. Without hesitation Gabriel down his drink in one quick gulp and gently pushed the glass back to the bartender. He shook his head and softly laughed to himself. His hues of an unnatural blue fell onto the bartender.

"More like rough few years."

Now it was the bartender's turn to chuckle although unlike Gabriel who seemed slightly amused when he had laughed the bartender's laugh was one of clear nervousness. He quickly refilled the glass and passed it back to Gabriel.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. I hear that a lot."

Snorting in a rather undignified mannerism Gabriel once more laughed only this time his laughter was angry and bitter. He downed his drink again and shoved it back at the bartender.  Using a bit more force than necessary. Gabriel scowled at the bartender.

"No. You have no idea what I mean."

The bartender opened his mouth. Perhaps he was going to agree with Gabriel or maybe he was about to counterattack. Whatever the case Gabriel didn’t want to hear it. He ran a hand down his face.

“Look, less talk tonight and more pouring....Please?”

The bartender’s face hardened up, but the near begging tone in Gabriel’s final word softened him back up. 

“Sure, pal.”

After this the only sound in the otherwise empty bar was Gabriel and the bartender sliding his glass back and forth.

[whoson1st]

Are you in the official King Falls server at all? Just trying to get an idea of what's going on and who knows what's going on

Hoooooo BOISE.

So, long story short, yes. Yes I’m in the discord, yes I know what’s going on, and it’s all really, really stupid. I think that there were mistakes made on a lot of fronts, but I also think that the end result is, in a lot of ways, a long time coming.

I haven’t been responding to things I’ve seen on social media for the most part, and wasn’t REALLY keen to respond to this, but there’s also a lot of misinformation happening due to hurt feelings. There’s plenty of abridged accounts of what’s going on, and I’m pretty sure you know that. I’m taking this question on good faith that it’s genuinely asking and not setting me up to get torn down but...honestly, either way, I don’t care. I’m not on tumblr much these days anyway so it doesn’t really matter, and internet drama is just….it’s always dumb. But there’s a lot of “evidence” being put forth that is out of context or in bad faith, and the people who are being the loudest are a whole lot of the problem, so I’ll put in my account and opinions.

Anyway, I’m putting everything under a cut because it’s...a lot.

So first off, full disclosure, I used to be a mod on the discord. I left the team at the beginning of the year of my own volition because I’m an adult with a job and a life and things to take care of that aren’t that and needed a break. I’m still friends with all the current mods, and talk to them regularly, as well as being on good terms with the cast and creators. Just in case you’re dead set on hating any of them, you should know that. I try to keep a pretty good perspective, and I’m a little more removed than I was a few months ago, but I won’t say I’m totally free of bias either. If that’s what you’re into, just go ahead and skip this.

This all started with a piece of fan art, which honestly should be a clue as to how petty this all is. The fanart included The Dirt in a BDSM outfit as part of a larger work, and it was posted in the fanart section of the discord. It was bordering on NSFW, and the artist maybe should have asked the mods and/or put it behind a spoiler tag--which is probably as far as the mods would have gone had they been consulted, because it was 1) part of a larger thing and 2) canon compliant (it’s Jacob Williams, what do you want?). Neither of those things happened, people complained, the art was taken down. Then Kyle Brown, one of the writers, retweeted the copy that had been uploaded to twitter on his personal account--his account, not KFAM official--and someone complained that it made them uncomfortable and was not safe for work. Another cast member, Trent Shumway, replied that twitter isn’t a safe for work site, which it’s not. Which then led to both Kyle and Trent being socially crucified for not taking more care in what their followers see on their personal accounts on an open social media platform that is not dedicated to any single person or work.

It was already stupid. Really, really stupid. Especially since this is not a SFW podcast. It never has been. Everyone remember the third episode with Archie’s pomchies? And I know that certain aspects of that make people uncomfortable but if you are choosing to listen to the show regardless of that, it’s on you. An artist isn’t going to repaint something because you’re not a fan of green. And the SFW rule on the server has always been “within the guidelines of the show”.

So then, someone made this post that has since been deleted but I’m including mostly because if other people want to go ahead and pull receipts, I’m also going to.

Before I go ANY further with this, I want to say this: this person has been a problem for a LONG TIME. Months, at least, since before I left the mod team, and is honestly part of the reason being a mod became so difficult for me. They have displayed a pattern of abuse of the mods, the creators, and other members of the community on both twitter and tumblr, and have made people on the discord server uncomfortable enough that they either don’t participate or have left completely. This one person. And they have a bully squad behind them. And it sucks. But in the end, it was always decided that we couldn’t police what people did on their individual accounts or single someone out who hadn’t technically broken guidelines in the server, despite numerous complaints, because the mods and creators want to make everyone feel that they’re included. This decision was made...numerous times. After multiple incidents. For months.

I had my own issues with this decision, but that’s neither here nor there, and doesn’t really matter anymore. Because that post was the straw that broke the camel’s back.

Kyle, misunderstanding the term, took it as a threat. Not hard to do, given the already heightened emotions, the tags, and this person’s history. So the person was immediately banned. The fact is, even without misunderstanding, that’s a really shitty post. That’s hating one a writer and a cast member and still wanting to pretend they have nothing to do with the THING THEY CREATE because this person doesn’t like what they said on twitter.

Following that, one of their friends--who had also been a longstanding problem--attempted to start a knockdown dragout in the general chat with one of the mods over this, and was upset when the mod in question first said they’d be happy to talk on DM but not on the server, and then ignored them when they repeatedly tried to carry on the argument.

Then they lit a candle in the channel the banned person had pitched a fit in order to form, as if the person was dead and not just a jerk. And then they made this post:

They also got banned, because OBVIOUSLY. Again, misunderstanding or not, that’s a horrible way to deal with it. You can’t possibly expect to call someone an illiterate fuckwad and still want to be included in spaces they created, much less EXPECT to be. 

And then several other people who were attempting the same nonsense publicly. And then invites were taken away when the mods got word that there was a possible plan in the works to spam the server. And there’s a weird campaign to EXPOSE THE CREATORS FOR THE ASSHOLES THEY ARE.

And that’s...about where things are at now. A lot of people are upset and hurt across the board. And it sucks.

Here’s the thing. Mistakes were made. Kyle misunderstood Death of the Author, and has a tendency toward knee-jerk, unedited reactions. The mods should have been more on top of the problem and not let it fester. There were ways that this could have been mitigated and done better. There always are.

But this was always going to happen in some fashion.

Podcasts and podcast communities are not new anymore, folks. But it still seems like people have a hard time grasping their actual level of involvement in the creation because of how active some creators are. You’re free to say whatever you want, but you are not free from consequence. And you’re not exempt from being wrong. This isn’t just a matter of the creators of KFAM--or any work, to be honest--not being able to take criticism, this is a matter of people thinking that their criticism is 100% correct 100% of the time, and the entitled attitude that comes with that. KFAM isn’t perfect, I have my own criticisms of it, because I have criticisms about basically everything under the sun, so it’s not just blind following. But it is trust in the creators and the people around them to find the best way to tell their story, to the see their problems and strive for better. And we’ve literally seen that happen in KFAM, in changes made to Walt, in Emily’s storyline, in Lily’s...everything. In the addition of “guys, gals, and non-binary pals”. They’re trying. They’re not perfect, but they’re not deaf. They’re also not obligated or beholden to everything their audience says regarding their story.

The whole argument that they can’t take criticism is undercut when it’s being made by people who think that everything they say should be taken as gospel, and treat every instance where someone disagrees with them as a personal attack. The scope of hypocrisy here is just...breathtaking.

Also, when not withstanding some nonsense attacks, they’re all genuinely kind and friendly. I already admitted some bias here, but seriously, they go out of their way to check on people and respond to people and lift people up. It’s total horse dookie to act like they don’t care about their fans.

And as for the discord--god, just get a life. The mods there work SO HARD to make everyone feel included, to encourage participation, the create a positive environment for people to talk about the things they love and make friends. They have meetings and spreadsheets and calendars and work together as a team and with Kyle to keep the place working smoothly even though there’s FIVE of them running a HUGE server. The person who was initially banned was forever complaining about the discord and how the mods ran it, even while some suggestions they had were implemented. But that discord has like 1500 people in it, gang, it’s not about what one person wants all the time. And that person has their own server anyway so just go be unhappy there and leave everyone else alone. It’s what you were doing anyway.

TL;DR: There was a lot of manufactured outrage over something incredibly dumb, and some misunderstandings, and resulted in actions that had been looming for a long time and just finally popped off. Kyle and the mods aren’t perfect, but they aren’t the villains. The people who were banned have a history of negativity and bullying that led to the decision to remove them.

If anyone takes anything from this, please let it be that it’s a GODDAMN PODCAST. If it makes you angry, if you don’t like it, go watch a movie. Eat a snack. Knit a sweater. Take a nap. Listen to a new music album. Literally anything. There’s so many things to do in this life that aren’t LOOKING for things to be upset about.

Remember the golden rule, and don’t be a dick.

[selkiewife]

I know i’m late on this but I wanted to talk about The Dragon Demands videos based on the Game of Thrones Season 8 blue ray commentary and the original archived scripts for Game of Thrones, Season 8.

Basically, YouTuber, The Dragon Demands went to the Writer’s Guild Library where he was able to see the archived scripts of Season 8 of Game of Thrones. Both the archive scripts and commentary on the blue ray confirms that most of the destruction in King’s Landing was originally supposed to be caused by the caches of wild fire left by Aerys being accidentally set off by Drogon and not because Daenerys herself “went mad.” The script says that civilians being used as human shields are caught in the crossfire as Daenerys is targeting Lannister soldiers in a strategical maneuver right before she heads to the Red Keep to enact revenge on Cersei. However, Daenerys is never described as specifically targeting innocent civilians needlessly.

My thoughts under the cut:

I have to say, that this makes me feel slightly better in a strange way. I mean, it doesn’t erase the bad writing, the ridiculous way the war against the white walkers ended, the misogyny, the inconsistency, etc etc ETC... but this crucial plot point was the one I just couldn’t let go of because it was just baffling to me. With other controversial plot points, I would disagree with them, but I could at least understand what they were going for and what the motivations of the characters were. But Daenerys turning on innocent civilians was truly baffling to me because it comes out of nowhere, is entirely out of character, her motivations are incredibly unclear, and was not set up at all. But with all the fandom discourse, I had really started to think that maybe I am lacking comprehension skills or something. But no, there is actually a reason it made no sense. The “madness” plot line was added later. Emilia Clarke was never given the opportunity to portray Daenerys as mentally unstable. Emilia was portraying grief and revenge on Cersei (as the original script and directors told her to do) in contrast to D&D’s final editing which was portraying the “mad queen.” No wonder it came across as completely false and bewildering- before we even get into the discussion of whether or not this is in character or not.

I think this is definitely more than just a theory that the script was changed pretty late in development because of all the evidence- it is confirmed by Emilia’s commentary, the Visual Effects team member’s commentary, and also the original concept art. But even if there wasn’t all that evidence, there is also the fact that the original ending makes so many other confusing things in Season 8 suddenly make SENSE.

For example, when Jon confronts Daenerys in the throne room and he talks about the women and children that were burned, Daenerys responds with “She used their innocence as a weapon against me.” Which makes total sense for Daenerys to say if she thinks she is talking about civilians that were used as human shields that died in the crossfire. But it doesn’t make any sense if she carpet bombed the city- although it does make her seem delusional, which is probably why Dave and Dan kept those lines in- hoping it would make her appear “mad,” since Emilia was never actually given the opportunity to portray Daenerys as mentally unstable.

There is also the scene where Jon asks Tyrion, “Was it right?” to assassinate Daenerys and Tyrion responds, “Ask me again in ten years.” There is really no reason for them to have that dialogue if Daenerys really did target and massacre innocent civilians. That is the kind of dialogue they would have if they were discussing someone who had done something more morally ambiguous.

Then there are the lines that are out of place in the final version but that would have made complete sense in the original wild fire version, such as Jon saying “now and always” as he stabs Daenerys. “Now and always” as any Theon fan will tell you, is a phrase that belongs to Theon and Robb and what they said to each other when Theon was pledging loyalty to Robb. Having Jon say this to Dany as he is killing Daenerys represents the ultimate betrayal but also calls back to Theon’s struggle and how difficult it is to chose between loyalties- between families. In this case, Jon is choosing the Starks over the Targaryens. Kit Harrington even says that this is motivation in an interview he gave with winteriscoming.net. But given the fact that in the final edit, Daenerys massacred innocent children and civilians on purpose, Kit’s motivation for Jon seems like a relic of an earlier script:

Kit Harrington: “Jon essentially sees it as Daenerys or Sansa and Arya, and that makes his mind up for him. He choose blood over, well, his other blood. But he chooses the people he has grown up with, the people his roots are with, the North. That’s where his loyalties lie in the end. That’s when he puts the knife in.”

And Yara Greyjoy’s lines. She surprisingly remains completely loyal to Daenerys, despite the fact that she massacred the entire city for no reason:

Yara Greyjoy: I swore to follow Daenerys Targaryen.

Sansa Stark: You swore to follow a tyrant.

Yara Greyjoy: She freed us from a tyrant. Cersei is gone because of her, and Jon Snow put a knife in her heart. Let the Unsullied give him what he deserves.

This kind of conversation only seems plausible if they are discussing Daenerys taking out Cersei after she had surrendered and killing human shields in the process, something I can see Yara completely defending- since she was always in favor of attacking King’s Landing as seen during her war counsel scenes in Season 7.

There is also the Emilia Clarke quote in the behind the scenes video HBO put out after the episode where she explains that Dany was targeting Cersei herself:

Emilia Clarke: “It’s just... grief. It’s hurt. And she has this ability to make that hurt a little bit less just for a minute. And here she is, sitting on this ridge and there’s the emotion and there’s the feeling and the feeling is to fucking kill her.”

Note that she does not say “the feeling is to fucking massacre the city,” or “the feeling is to target innocent civilians.” She says “the feeling is to kill her” as in Cersei Lannister- who is responsible for the death of her dragon and Missandei- and who massacred countless innocents herself when she blew up the goddamn sept lol.

Not to mention all of the set up lines between Cersei, Tyrion, and Varys about Cersei using “human shields” which never came to fruition in the final edit, now make complete sense:

Cersei: Keep the gates open. If she wants to take the castle she’ll have to murder thousands of innocents first.

Varys: Tens of thousands of innocents will die. That is why Cersei is bringing them into the Red Keep

And yet, lol, we never actually SEE Daenerys attacking the Red Keep. We never see innocent civilians inside the Red Keep. We only see civilians being massacred in the streets.

I also remember people who had seen the post Season 8 Game of Thrones Live Concert saying that Ramin switched to footage of the other wildfire scenes in past Game of Thrones seasons during his Bells sequence, instead of showing the massacre of innocent civilians by dragon fire. I use to think he did that because Daenerys was his favorite character. But given what we now know about the original ending, he probably chose to show the wildfire scenes because that was what he had specifically written music for before it was changed- the destruction of Kings Landing by wildfire.

I really wish they had kept the original script the way it was. It still would have been an incredibly controversial ending. Daenerys still goes after soldiers and a Queen who is surrendering- and that action unintentionally leads to the destruction of the entire city. Jon Snow still assassinates his lover and betrays one part of his family for the other. But, it would have at least made logical sense. People would have gone back and forth over whether it was in character or whether it was a good ending. But it would have been something people would be able to actually debate on an intellectual level- the way we debate Daenerys crucifying the slavers (who themselves crucified children) or Jon Snow executing Olly... It is a very grey and tragic ending with a lot of moral questions. It still might have gone over like a lead balloon. But... the ending we have is so much worst because it’s nonsensical.

The only reason I can think that they changed it was to make Jon and Tyrion appear less morally grey for plotting Daenerys’ assassination. They probably knew that the ending would be very problematic and were trying to smooth that over by turning Daenerys into a super villain. Yet they did this too late in the process after already showing Daenerys to be heroic in fighting with the north and then having Emilia Clarke finish her filming still believing she was playing a complex and at times ruthless character but not “mad” or “evil.” And then, there is also the intensely problematic issue with them conflating mental illness with mass murdering super villain. Even if it had been clear throughout the entire season that Daenerys was losing her grip on reality and becoming more and more mentally unstable, it still would have been incredibly controversial and I am not entirely sure it would have made the men look any better anyway.

Even though it is tragic af, at least with the original wildfire ending, all of the characters are incredibly complex and morally grey and you can understand the motivations for everything they do, even if you don’t agree with them. For example, if Daenerys attacks Cersei after she surrendered, it is wrong, but it is also completely understandable. And in my opinion, it’s even more understandable when you remember that Cersei cannot be trusted. She can’t be trusted to send her armies to the north- why should Daenerys trust her to surrender in good faith? This kind of ending would also have said something very powerful about unintended consequences. Even though Daenerys did not intend for so many people to die needlessly, they did because war is horrific. And that message becomes even more powerful if her motivations are understandable. But yeah, this kind of ending would have still been hated and debated but... at least the debates would have been more about the story itself rather than everyone trying (and failing) to make sense of what the story even is.

[justowrites]

opinions regarding the joshua bassett drama/allegations?

I’ve been thinking about this a lot, so thank you for asking. I’ll start by saying this: I believe it is fundamentally crucial to believe survivors when they share their stories. However, believing survivors is not the same thing as immediately crucifying the alleged perpetrator. It’s such a fine line to walk, but in any conversation about justice, we must also remember that a major tenet of any sort of justice is the presumption of innocence. It’s a balance I’m still trying to find because the two ideas feel so in-conflict with one another most days.  Here’s where I’m at. We should believe survivors when they share their stories. That means recognizing their vulnerability and offering them support. It is then upon us to look into the claims in an unbiased manner. We should examine their stories and consider: are there holes in this story that don’t add up? Are the details too vague to corroborate? And if so, we should consider why. At the end of the day, we must be ready to accept that not all people who claim to be survivors are, in fact, survivors. While the vast majority of allegations turn out to be substantiated, there are those few who will seek to make accusations out of malice. By vigorously pursuing every alleged perpetrator without stopping to reasonably examine the claims against them, we run the risk of watering down the testimony of survivors who come forward with the truth. We run the risk of sowing a larger seed of doubt in the minds of the public. And we damage survivors’ ability to pursue justice and peace.  With regard to the allegations/drama around Joshua Bassett specifically, from what I’ve read it seems that the original accuser has since claimed that they were making allegations against him as a “social experiment.” This matches a string of recent allegations against male celebrities that have later been proven to be false. So in this case, in taking into account the accuser’s own words, I do not believe they were being honest in their accusations.  I can understand people’s initial outrage and the backlash against Josh, as much as I wish it wasn’t such a knee-jerk reaction. What I’m more disheartened by is the fact that those same people, confronted with evidence from the accuser themselves, are refusing to back down and are continuing to push the idea that he is an abuser. That, to me, says that this was never truly about believing the narratives of survivors. We should believe survivors. But we should also be ready to admit if we were wrong. I think a lot of the toxicity of the fandom/its propensity for drama can be boiled down to a number of things: (a) the fanbase of this show/the stars in general is relatively young. This is a show targeted at tweens/early teens that happens to also hold appeal to adults like me. The idea of launching assault allegations against someone as a “social experiment” is logically irresponsible to an adult, and most adults would never consider such a thing. I teach middle school, though, and I can assure you that people in that age range do not have the same ability to consider their actions and the far-reaching consequences they may have. (b) Twitter is an especially vicious social media platform in my experience, and allegations like this catch like wildfire there, which leads to people getting second or third-hand information and forming an entire, immovable opinion based on that information without any critical thought or research of their own. (c) We’re still in quarantine, which means less (or no) work/school/etc. I don’t want to reduce false accusations to simply “bored kids being bored” because that makes it sound a lot more innocuous than it is, but I do also think that part of the reason these things spread so quickly and so viciously is that we all have so much more free time to inundate ourselves with social media.  So yeah. It’s a terrible situation all around, and I’ve distanced myself even more than usual from Twitter because the toxicity is stomach-churning. Based on the evidence presented, I don’t believe Josh Bassett is guilty of the initial allegations, especially in light of the accuser claiming it was a “social experiment.” I hope that this doesn’t lead to people taking survivors less seriously when they come forward, and I seriously hope that this recent trend of making baseless accusations stops because it is very damaging to a movement that has helped shed a light on the ways the entertainment industry exploits people - particularly women - within it.  TL;DR: Believe survivors, but also examine evidence with a critical eye. We do no one any favors by ruthlessly pursuing those with accusations against them even after the preponderance of evidence suggests the claims were false. 

[alma-berry]

About the discussion of sexualization – I hate it when people sexualize Kitty. And before people tell me I'm being homophobic, I'm not. I hate it when people sexualize Dru and Ash or Dru and Jaime. I just hate people sexualizing children. If the author writes them exploring their sexuality on page, then that's different. Sexualizing is taking something inherently not sexual and making it sexual. Kit and Ty are a) minors, and b) not sexual in the books. As a +LGBTQ teen, I find it disrespectful.

To add on to my previous ask, the reason I find it disrespectful is bc children are generally hypersexualized these days. Yes, teens do explore their sexuality, but that's an active choice made by them. When someone else pushes a sexual image/narrative on them...I hate that. In the case of characters, authors writing a teenager exploring their sexuality would be the equivalent of the character choosing, but when fandom sexualizes them, they're pushing a sexual image on a child...eww.

***

Thank you for your message and opinion. I’d answer this as carefully as I can, seeing that I'm most definitely not a minor, and your feelings and opinions are something I’d like to answer respectfully.

I agree that it’s unsettling to see people sexualize minors, especially ones so young as the boys and Dru are in the books. I think it’s even more often with queer people because they’re forced to have sexual narratives. Being queer doesn’t mean everything about you must be told through a sexual lens, it’s only part of your identity, not it’s whole. Same with young girls. A girl’s clothing company in my country did a disgusting campaign a few years ago when their main model, who’s a minor, was shown in a very sexually suggestive way in a hot tub, all across billboards in the entire country, I was so mad. I’m all up for girls exploring their bodies and feel empowered by their sexuality, but it’s not up to a clothing company to use this to their advantage by sexualizing these young girls.

I also appreciate you emphasizing how authors who allow their characters to explore their sexualities help young people to feel less crucified by doing it themselves. 

I mostly wonder what form of sexualization you feel these characters are going through in this fandom? I haven’t seen Dru getting any bad treatment - I might have just missed it, but it’s also possible that I haven’t considered something as sexualizing, and that’s why I would really want to know what you mean and feel.

About Kitty: I understand your frustration as a queer teen, to see a ship like Kitty gets so much sexual hype around them. Especially considering how queer reps are looked at as sexual automatically, which like I previously said - is highly dangerous. Straightforward sexual descriptions of such young boys are obviously problematic and highly uncomfortable to encounter. I’m not sure I’ve seen as much here like in fics in ao3... but here the situation is quite different. 

As far as I’ve seen, most of the more sexual content related to this ship circles around the older versions of Kit and Ty. Now, some people think that aging up characters in fanfiction is morally wrong. That it’s an excuse to sexualize minors and that it’s the work of sexually frustrated old ladies. I think it’s ignorant, offending, and dangerous to say. 

I, for instance, write Kitty fanfiction. I don’t write about them at 15, I’m more interested in exploring what the time they spent apart could emotionally lead them to be as young men. Is it okay for them to be sexually active in those situations? in my opinion, yes. They are no longer the Kit and Ty you know, and they’re old enough to be allowed to follow this narrative in a healthy way. Am I writing them because of some depraved need to write them as sexual? No, I often just let them pine over each other. I and probably many fanfic writers, write because we feel hallowed by the way the story ended and need to creatively let our emotions out. I see nothing wrong with that.

So, my question to is - is that sexualizing a character? I don’t think so, but I’m not in yours or any other teen’s place. Maybe aging up characters makes you feel like you yourself are being forced to age up. I can’t say, and I’m not entitled to, it’s not my place. All I can say is let’s all try to be more considerate and cautious with our words and actions, knowing that there’s a lot of eyes reading them, and maybe affected or even hurt by them. And by all, I mean all of us, no matter our age.