#and sorry for taking a little bit to do it
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moechies · 1 day ago
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older shiu who makes you fuck yourself on a dildo in front of him becuase he can’t fuck you—can’t get hard without those stupid little pills because of his growing age. ♡
and you pout, sniffle and whine when he tells you to put a show on for him instead of taking you into his hold and fucking you senseless on the memory mattress of his penthouse overlooking the ocean view.
you’re still whining, even when tugging down your panties to reveal that pretty, fresh pussy that he’s been looking forward to all day— and he thinks it must be a curse bestowed upon him not being able to get hard at the sight before him. perhaps it’s karma for all of his previous sins— he doesn’t know.
and when you finally slip your cotton panty off your left leg, it hanging from your right angle as you shakily spread your legs, taking the pink, transparent toy to slide it up and down against your slick.
you hiss, breath hitching weakly at the lack of preparation, realizing just how tantalizing it is to press the rather small toy (in comparison to him, at least) in without the help of your lover.
“sh—shiu, please, prep me, h—help, shiu!”
you whimper, dropping the toy and tossing your arms around the thick of his neck.
“oh darling, i told you to put a show on for me, didn’t i? you can’t even finger yourself open?” he scoffs condescendingly, only shaking your head with soft sniffles against his chest.
“pleaseee, daddy!”
“how cruel. do you know how weak you make me, little lady?”
you gasp when you feel a thick finger press against your soddened slit, barely slipping inside your gooey walls before curling the joint up.
“haaah, daddy!”
“there you go.” he whispers when you fall pliant against his hold, back against his burly chest with his free hand splayed across your tummy—tracing soft circles across your hips. “my good girl.”
“you can’t even take that little cock without needin’ my help baby? what would you do without me, baby.”
you writhe when his thumb presses down on your clit, circling the sensitive nub so perfectly that you almost think he’ll let you cum. but your fantasies are resolved to nothing, “there you go baby.” shiu grunts, quickly removing his fingers from your pussy and reaching for the dildo yet again.
“here baby. utilize this. make y’r daddy proud?”
you thrash in frustration, whining out loud as you take the stupid, stupid toy into your hands.
“daddy, wan’ you to d—do it.”
“what, fuck you with it?”
you nod slowly, teary eyes so awfully big and alluring that he almost falls for your little scenic ploy.
“no, baby, do it yourself.” he knows you all too well.
and with a bit of bargaining and some more incessant whining, you find yourself splayed in front of the man once again, your calves stepping over his thighs from where he sits, the pink toy held promptly in between your thighs.
you can’t help the soft cry that leaves your lips after pushing in the tip of the toy— much harder and nonetheless, cold in comparison to your husbands cock. compared to shiu, the toy deems to be unfulfilling and fustrating to use after months of laying prettily under your husband and allowing him all the work.
“da—daddy,”
“yes, darling? do you like it? bein’ a little exhibitionist f’me, hon? i sure do.”
“a..am i doing it r—right?” you sigh, mindlessly pushing in further and helping at the unexpected pain you had never even fell close to feeling when your husband was doing the word.
“not quite. have some rhythm, baby. you’re just pushing it into my poor cunny relentlessly.”
“noo… please, don’t wa—wanna, wan’ you to do it!”
“you’re too spoiled, baby.”
nonetheless, shiu pulls you into his much bigger lap, taking the toy into his left hand and spreading the fatty lips of your pussy with his right.
“she’s all swollen, you’ve been so mean to her. treatin’ her so bad.”
all you can manage is to whimper out a sorry, thumping your leg in desperation.
“listen up now,” shiu instructs, pressing the sticky tip of the dildo to your slit at a lower angle in contrast to your previously straight one. “see how i’ve angled it? isn’t that always how i fuck you? and it never hurts, does it?”
“no, daddy.” you whimper, thighs quivering in anticipation.
“good, now,” he grunts, pressing the tip in so swiftly that it makes you wince. “hnn—“
“look, i’ll fuck you with rhythm, and you’ll feel the difference between how you and i did it. alright?” you only gasp, incapable of a word response and only nodding incessantly.
he pumps the toy into you with fervor, slowing when he presses the toy in deeper and deeper until the plastic base barely touches your soppy cunt. he pulls the toy out much faster, keeping his consistent pace with rudy pummels to your simulated cunt.
“d—daddy!”
you clasp your thighs around the toy—which was much more manageable when he had his waist in between your little thighs that make it physically impossible to avoid his fuckings.
"don't shut your legs doll. i'll stop and you won't cum at all if you do it again." the man growls, pinching at the skin of your thigh. you yelp, spreading your thighs again to avoid conflict with the man.
"you look like you're enjoying this too much, darling. are you even taking this as a learning experience?"
you nod, unsure of what he really even said but if it meant he'd keep up with his pace-you didn't care. you gasp, breath hitching when he stops adruptly. removing the slicked up toy from your clenching cunt.
"here," shiu hands you the sticky toy, feeling your eyes well with tears and bottom lip tremble when you realize,
"you know how to do it now, right? fuck yourself, then, and it better impress me.”
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pellucid-constellations · 2 days ago
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Knowing You
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Azriel was intimidating, scary—a menacing presence in almost every setting. But not to you. Never to you.
Tattoo Artist!Azriel x Elementary School Teacher!Reader (1k words, modern au)
~~
“Why’s your boyfriend all…pissed off?” 
“Huh?” You spun your head around, finding Azriel towering over everyone else in the room, a scowl seemingly permanent on his face. His eyes narrowed from time to time, taking in the crowd and its unwillingness to calm. He remained plastered to the back wall. 
“Oh,” you laughed, turning back to your friend with your fingertips drumming against your jaw. “He’s not pissed. That’s just his face.” 
Your friend’s brows jumped up to her hairline. “He always looks like that?” 
“He doesn’t look that angry.”
“Absolutely no one is approaching him. This is a party. He looks about ready to pummel that tiny guy next to him.” 
“He’s just a little intimidating,” you reasoned. “And—hey, look!” you pointed over your shoulder. “He smiled a little, see?” 
She scoffed, sipping her beer. “I don’t get it. You’re all… well, you. And he’s all dark and mysterious and—honestly kinda scary.” 
You chewed on your bottom lip and turned further to inspect the man you had been in a relationship with for the better half a year. Was he scary? You certainly didn’t think so. Maybe a little at first. Maybe when you walked into that tattoo shop with your friend and his dark gaze almost burned a hole in your head. But not now. Never now. 
“You don’t really get him, that’s all.”
“And you do? He’s got a whole thing going on that you shouldn’t be tied up in,” your friend urged, but this was hardly the time for long, important conversations. You were tipsy and the music was too loud and, to be honest, you’d heard it all before already. Nothing was going to change your mind about Azriel. 
“Are you even listening, y/n? You’re polar opposites. And you said that he smiles but I have still yet to see one since—oh.” 
Azriel spotted you then—his goal from the moment he walked into this overly crowded house. He hadn’t been pissed. He’d been looking for you. 
And it was clear that he spotted you, because the second he did a wide grin split up his perfect face. It simmered a bit when he realized your friend was observing the scene, but a quirk of his mouth still remained. He started his path to you then, weaving in and out of the inebriated crowd. 
He touched you the moment he could, his hand meeting the small of your back as you sat on the creaky kitchen stool. His lips pressed against your temple and a murmured greeting was lost in your hair. He was lost in the bubble he created each time he had you in his grasp, your bright eyes and adoring smile rendering him unmoveable, but then your friend subtly cleared her throat and Azriel looked away. 
“Hello, Amber,” Azriel greeted, keeping your body slotted into the crook of his arm. “Having fun?” 
She blinked at him. He really was intimidating, especially up close. Even with the heightened bar stools, he was a good head over where the two of you sat. 
“Um, yes, thank you.” 
“And the summer break?” he questioned. He had started to rub circles into your spine. 
Amber stuttered again, thoughts lost in her head before replying, “It was good. I’m sorry—how do you know my name?” 
“Y/n’s mentioned you. I’ve seen your Instagram, too. Connected the dots.” 
“Right,” Amber nodded, her eyes trailing down the vast array of tattoos that wound up from the neck of Azriel’s shirt. 
Azriel then looked back down to you. His voice was low, almost too low for the pounding music, but he made up for that by pressing up closer to you. “Are you ready to go, sweetheart?” 
You giggled at the feel of his breath at your ear, pushing him away slightly in a haze. He only shook his head and smiled at the space you’d created. 
“Trying to flirt with me in public? Azriel, you are scandalous.” 
He only breathed out a laugh, gaze bouncing between your glossy eyes. Once you stopped giggling enough to meet his stare, his expression softened. “You told me to pick you up at eleven. You have a lesson plan, pretty girl.”
You gasped, slapping a hand against Azriel's chest that didn’t even have him flinching. You whipped your head over to Amber—who was staring at the two of you in confused amusement —and hurriedly offered, “I have to go! Third grade!” 
In his efforts to capture your attention, Azriel had woven both of his arms around you to meet at your lower back, a hold that you now shot out of. You wobbled as you pressed out of the stool and grabbed Azriel’s leather sleeve. An unnecessary gesture; anyone at this party could see that the man would follow you anywhere. 
“I didn’t prep the multiplication tables,” you rambled, words slurring together. 
“You did. I helped you with the formatting on the iPad.” 
“I let you touch my iPad?” you gasped. 
“No, sweetheart. It was mine.” 
“Your work one?” 
Azriel only continued to guide you out of the party, you none the wiser to the dirty looks he was shooting everyone too drunk to get out of the way. 
“Let’s get back to your apartment, okay? Then we can deal with the iPad.” 
You giggled, springing off the threshold to the front door and giving Azriel a heart attack. “Okay!” 
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traveler-at-heart · 3 days ago
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Sister, wife?
Summary: The team mistakes you for Natasha's sister when you first meet.
Request by @lynattyx
Loki again.
Thor seemed more annoyed than anyone else, but that was only logical. He had spent centuries putting up with his brother.
“Hey, don’t sweat it. Siblings can be a pain” Natasha tried to comfort him, while he looked ready to release a storm over Loki outsmarting him and escaping.
“Speaking from experience, Red?” Stark asked with a curious stare.
“Got a sister” Natasha shrugged her shoulders, looking out the window of the Quinjet as if she hadn’t said anything interesting.
“Really? What’s her name?” Steve said, intrigued.
“I won’t tell you, because if I say it three times you’ll summon her. That’s a reference from…”
“Yeah, I got it” Steve nodded. “I didn’t really like that Beetlejuice”
“That’s because you hate fun” Tony said, stepping forward. “Alright, we have a signal. Anyone up for a cigar? Loki’s close to Cuba”
“Lay low. That’s pretty much all you can do now” Maria said with a somber tone over the comms.
Loki had gone a little too far this time, almost getting half of Havana blown up.
Needless to say, the US wasn’t happy with the diplomatic mess the Avengers had created. Maybe that was Loki’s plan all along; make it impossible for them to go after him with the American government on their backs.
Well, he got what he wished for.
“I don’t suppose we can go to the Compound, then” Tony mumbled. “Barton, Red? Any ideas?”
“Coordinates are set. We’ll be there in a few hours. Try to get some sleep. All of you”
No one was in the mood to ask questions. If Natasha said it was a safe place, then they’d take her word for it and be done with the matter.
“You sure about this?” Clint said, looking at her from the copilot seat.
“Yeah. She’ll just give me a hard time for not telling her in advance. You know how she likes to have everything extra clean when there are guests”
“How did you manage to score such a gal?” he joked and Natasha glared at him.
“Hey, I’m a catch. My mac and cheese is delicious”
“Whatever you say, Tasha”
The Quinjet landed, and the only way you could tell was by the tree branches moving with a sudden gust of wind.
“Hey” Natasha said with a coy smile, going up the steps as the rest of the team got off the jet, looking around curiously.
“Welcome home” you pulled her into a hug. “Should have told me they were coming, and I could have cleaned up a bit”
“I missed you too” she joked against your ear, and as she was about to lean and kiss you, Tony interrupted the moment.
“Hey, Romanoff and Romanoff”
“You must be Tony. I’ve heard a lot about you”
“Have you? Because Natasha here didn’t tell us much about you”
“She was probably worried about you running your mouth” you joked, making him smirk.
“You have heard about me”
As Steve walked in, Natasha waited for Clint to show him something she wanted to fix in the garage.
The house was big and in the middle of a little wooded area.
“You’re gonna have to share rooms. And someone will sleep on the couch” you warned them.
“Not it” Tony said, as you pulled out a pillow and a blanket from the closet.
“I’ll take the couch” Steve offered, which of course he did. “Thank you…”
“Y/N” you nodded, waiting for Tony to follow you.
“Barton? Thor?” he looked around.
“Oh, Clint’s probably scolding Natasha because she didn’t fix the ceiling like he told her to” you laughed. “Thor flew away like thirty seconds after landing. And burned part of my lawn in the process”
“So sorry about that. It’s quite the thing to hang out with these brutes. So, uh, what do you do?”
“I’m a Psychiatrist” you answered, opening the door to the guest room.
“Get to see Natasha a lot?”
“Not as much as I’d like”
“Come by the Compound anytime you like. I’ll send you a pass or shall I just say your name three times?”
“What?” you tilted your head in confusion.
“Nothing. Thanks for letting us crash” he rubbed his neck.
“Sure. Get some rest”
You ran into Clint as he went upstairs, knowing his way around the house.
“She’s outside”
“Is she… is she ok?” you said, sighing. It was one thing to see it in the news, and another one to know she was out there risking her life against literal Gods and aliens.
“Just tired” he assured you. “Seeing you will help. Have a good night”
“You too. Sorry to say you’re sharing a room with Tony”
“Ah, jeez” he groaned, making you laugh.
Steve was lying in the couch, restless. He waved at you shyly as you walked out, knowing Natasha was waiting in the porch.
Honestly? They were a nice bunch.
“Hey” you said, stepping out.
“Hi, detka”
“You ok?” you said, leaning your chin against her shoulder, with your arms around her waist.
“Just tired”
“Funny, that’s exactly what Clint said”
Natasha chuckled at that, squeezing your hands.
“He knows me”
“I know you better”
“Do you, now?” she turned around, quirking up an eyebrow and smiling at you. “So, what do you think I want right now?”
“Cuddles with your wife and then tomorrow morning I think you’ll be in the mood for blueberry pancakes and hot cocoa”
“Damn, you do know me well” she laughed, kissing your temple. “Come on, let’s go to bed”
You were up next morning, and unsurprisingly, Steve had already been out and running a good ten miles.
“The rest?” he said after greeting you.
“Clint got up early to fix what Natasha broke trying to fix the other thing that broke, God bless his soul. Tony’s asleep and so is Nat”
“Really? Even Romanoff? She’s up at break of dawn”
“Nah, not when she’s home. Now clean yourself up, breakfast is almost done”
“Yes, Ma’am”
Natasha was the first one down, as your room had a private bathroom. By the sounds from upstairs, you suspected the boys were arguing over who go to use the other restroom first.
“Hear that sound? Children. Ready for all that?” Natasha said.
“Yeah, but ours will be cute. And we’ll make Clint build another bathroom” you said, getting a pancake out of the pan.
“You’re so smart, that’s why I love you”
“Only that?” you said, laughing as you felt her hands go around your waist.
“Among other things”
You turned around to protest, but her lips stopped you from saying anything.
“I did miss this” she said, pulling you closer to deepen the kiss. You moaned against her mouth, forgetting there were more people in the house until you heard Tony slam the door to the bathroom. Natasha went to get some coffee, and you wished she’d kept kissing you.
But the teasing would be endless if they caught you in the middle of it.
“Bathroom's all yours, Cap! Morning, Romanoffs”
“Morning, Tony” you said. “Help yourself to some pancakes and coffee”
“Delicious, thank you”
Steve came down a few minutes later, at the same time Clint walked in, announcing that he had fixed the thing.
“You’re a hero” you said, grateful. “Don’t worry, darling, you’ll get it right next time” you added as Natasha pouted.
“Mean”
“It comes with the territory, doesn’t it?” Tony said. “Including all the hair pulling and slapping and fighting for bras”
“Ah, what?” you said, confused.
“Hey, don’t speak to my wife that way, asshole” Natasha slapped the back of his head, making him choke on his coffee.
“Did you just say wife?” he turned to look between the two of you.
“Yes, Y/N is my wife. Who did you think she was?”
“The maid?” you joked.
“The sister!” Tony looked at Steve for backup.
“Well, to be fair… yeah”
“My sister’s name is Yelena” Natasha said, massaging her temples. “Y/N and I have been married for almost two years now. And I didn’t want you to know because you’ll be insufferable about it”
“Babe, they’ve been good so far” you chuckled, squeezing her hand.
“We can behave, honey boo” Tony said.
“Ok, yeah. I get it now” you rolled your eyes.
“Either way, you’re coming to our party” Tony said, poruing himself more coffee.
“When is it?”
“Whenever we get our hands on that Asgardian bastard”
“Language” you said at the same time as Steve.
“This is gonna be fun” Tony laughed, looking at you over his cup of coffee. “Welcome to the family, Mrs. Romanoff”
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lambilegs · 2 days ago
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best friend's older sister!sevika headcanons pt. 2
contains: modern!au, nsfw content (so minors/ageless blogs dni!!), cursing, reader is mentioned to have family issues, hcs + blurbs set pre-confession and post-confession, mention of spanking, strap-on sex (reader receiving), breeding kink, dirty talk, degrading (the word "slut" is used), humiliation kink, sevika physically teasing reader at family dinner, mention of smoking, reader's body is referred to w the terms "pussy" and "clit"
pt. 1
best friend's older sister!sevika who pauses outside her door when she hears the muffled noises of your crying, followed by her sister's voice. her eyebrows immediately draw in concern, stomach turning as possibilities run through her mind. you mentioned having an exam earlier this week -- did you fail it? was someone bothering you? did you need her to do anything?
when her sister's in the shower, she knocks quietly on the door, your call of, "yeah?" pushing her to enter.
once she does, her eyes immediately scan your face, looking for signs of distress. when she finds your eyes pink and glossy, a bolt of nervousness shoots through her, taking her off guard for a second.
once she swallows down the feeling, she tilts her head at you, leaning on the frame. "all okay?" she asks, trying to keep her voice levelled, not wanting to reveal just how much worry is stirring within.
"yeah." your mouth is twisted in something resembling pain, and she eyes you carefully as you sit up in the bed. "it's just, you know, family stuff."
she nods. she understands that, alright. most people would think that being the older of the two, she'd fight with her father less than her little sister, but the truth is that out of everyone in her house, they butt heads more than anyone else. she usually shrugs it off when anyone asks, with her most popular coping mechanism being fuming in her bedroom with a cigar while heavy music blankets over all her thoughts. probably not the healthiest way to react, but it's worked for this long. besides, she doesn't have the patience to sit at a desk and do that journalling bullshit her sister always prattles on about.
"sorry." she contemplates for a few moments on what else she could say to help, rocking on the balls of her sock-clad feet. all she comes up with is, "families suck," silently berating herself for being so incompetent.
but, at least you laugh, the noise a bit breathless, so sevika takes pride in that. "yeah, that's the understatement of the century."
"do you wanna, I don't know, talk about it?" just to ease the weight of the question, she mutters, "you know, I'm pretty good at belting insults at anyone who deserves it."
"oh, yes, I'm sure of it." you nod at the wall where the shower can be heard from. "she's told me how vicious you were in middle school."
she bristles, feeling her stomach tighten in embarrassment. she was a little asshole, alright, and she can't lie, her younger sister bore the brunt of it. something she secretly regrets now -- not that she'd ever admit to it. she probably never would've revealed it you in the first place if not for her sister ratting her out.
"well, I-- that was middle school. I'm not like that now."
your eyebrow raises, lips tilting up. "you know, some people would argue that who you are as a kid shows what kind of person you are at the core of it."
she scoffs. "who, freud? considering the other stuff I've heard about that guy, I think I'll pass on believing that bullshit."
"oh, c'mon, I can tell you all the merits about his theories."
"and while that sounds riveting, I guess, I'd prefer knowing if you... you know, need anything?" she shrugs, her eyes trained on you.
you smile softly, the corners of your lips crinkling. "thank you. I don't feel like talking about it much now, but I appreciate it a lot."
she nods, rasping on the doorframe, unsure as to how to proceed now.
"huh, someone's not really used to this."
she rolls her eyes, sending you a half-hearted glare. "oh, shut up."
best friend's older sister!sevika whose attention towards you is beginning to become obvious, even for you. she's started seeking you out instead of any of your other friends when she's looking for her sister, and when she enters the room, her eyes always flicker to you immediately. it makes you feel like a spotlight is casted upon you, your entire body, your entire being, reserved for sevika.
one day, one of the girls in your group leans over to you, her tone lowered with conspiracy. "you know, I think sevika has a thing for you."
your best friend groans, smacking her arm. "god, please! that's my sister, for god's sake."
"and? she's hot?"
her face morphs into complete disgust, eyes squeezing shut. "please, that's so fucking gross."
while you laugh along with the conversation, you can't help but warily glance to your best friend, mind whirring with thoughts of whether or not she's being earnest. you and sevika aren't, well, anything really -- at least not anything officially declared or acted upon. for months, it's just been tosses and back-and-forths of teasing and flirting. but, there has been no step over the threshold that divides you two between nameless, vague chemistry and the agreement to work towards a real relationship.
but, still, there is something there, and you cradle a hope in your chest that it'll turn into more one day, an actual thing that can be named. but, it's hard to feel positive about that outcome when you're not even certain if your best friend would approve or feel comfortable.
she meets your pondering stare, and you immediately backtrack, turning away so she can't read what's on your face.
a moment later, her palm rests on your knee and she laughs, tone as casual as ever when she says, "honestly, if anyone could tame her, it's you."
your lips part in shock, but she simply squeezes down gently before carrying on with the conversation.
best friend's older sister!sevika who pretty much wants to wring her cousin's neck out when she spots her conversing with you. well, it's not the conversing that's the problem -- she's not that crazy. or at least, she pretends not to be.
it's the fact that she knows her cousin hits on every one of her and her sister's friends, and she's clearly doing that with you right now, eyes half-lidded and voice lowered to what sevika hopes sounds more like darth vader than sexy to you. god, she nearly wants to kill her sister for being stupid enough to leave you alone with her. but, judging from her sister's shit-eating grin from where she stands at the food table, sevika suspects that it was intentional.
she tries not to crush her plastic red cup in her hand and send her vodka-spiked punch spilling everywhere. when her sister had casually mentioned last night that you'd be showing up to this family barbecue, sevika, much to her own embarrassment, had felt an immediate buzz of anticipation at knowing you'd be there. it's stupid, she knows. she's a grown ass woman, not some teenager -- yet, there she was, biting back a smile as she walked up the flight of stairs back to her bedroom. and when she reached her destination, she could barely focus, her thoughts straying to how she'll get a rise out of you rather than remaining on the toy she was meant to be building for the kid she babysits, isha.
she couldn't lie to herself about it. she was goddamn excited.
if only she had known how the day would wind up. it's nearing to late afternoon, and still, she hasn't spoken to you once. as soon as you and her sister had reached, the two of you had met with your usual gaggle of girls. and sevika hadn't been in the mood to entertain their giggles and leering stares upon coming to get you from them. and so, she waited. and then, you were dragged off to talk to her sister's favourite cousins, and then, to the idiot you're currently speaking to. a few minutes into what sevika hopes is a cringe-inducing conversation, her sister had left you to go to the food table.
she knows she has no reason to be jealous of her cousin. after all, look at the dimwit, she barely has game. she's so flashy with it, no subtlety. if you weren't the object of her cousin's attention, she might've actually taken some amusement in watching from afar.
but, no, it just had to be you. she can't even blame her cousin -- after all, you do look damn good, that's for certain. if this wasn't a family event, she'd be dragging you to the nearest corner, pushing you against the wall, and teasing you until you're a squirming little mess. god, she's just throbbing at the idea of it.
but, the feeling gets washed over with ice when her dumb cousin starts stroking her knuckles against your arm. stupid kid. and why are you smiling at her? do you not realize she's flirting? do you like that she's flirting? oh, now that thought leaves a sour taste in her mouth.
her composure snaps when she sees you laugh, and with a firm toss of her cup in the nearest garbage bag, she calmly makes her way to you. she knows she ought to be better than this. she should be the one with sense, with rationality -- the one who keeps her shit together while you become a fumbling mess whose feelings might as well be written on your forehead. that should be you. not her.
but, it's like her mind is working on overdrive, all her instincts honed in on making sure she takes you away and has you all to herself.
when she slides next to you two, your jump in surprise, looking up at her. her eyes rove over your features, drinking you in, wondering momentarily if you even realize how crazy you drive her.
"hey, sev, are you looking for your sister? because she's--"
"no," she cuts in, her palm bracing against the small of your back. "give us a sec."
"wha-- but, I--"
sevika doesn't give her cousin a moment to protest, firmly guiding you away to the front of her house, which has been left secluded now that people are eating in the backyard.
when you stumble into her back from her sudden halt, you blow out a frustrated puff of air. "what the hell was that?"
she feels her thick, dark eyebrows furrow, her gaze casted down on you, unwavering and focused. "I should be asking you that. why were you talking to her?"
"your sister left me with her!" you protest, your voice raising a pitch she'd find cuter if it weren't for the sour taste in her mouth.
"and? that makes you incapable of leaving a conversation afterwards?"
your eye twitches. "and why should I have left the conversation?"
sevika swallows, feeling her throat bob with the movement. if she acts like some jealous girlfriend, it'll be all too clear what it is she feels. and that's a bit too exposing for her. sure, you two flirt and push-and-pull, but it's something she could easily pass as a game if ever needed be. but, jealousy, disliking you talking to someone other than her? that's way too obvious, and there's no way of covering that up.
so, she takes a different route. "you know, if you're gonna be hitting on someone at this thing, it should be--"
"you?"
she nearly splutters, blinking hard at your growing smirk before continuing. "no. it should be someone other than the fuckboy-wanna-be relative who hits on anything with a pair of nice legs and pretty eyes."
your smile only widens and sevika has the sudden urge to bend you over her lap until you're a sobbing mess.
"so, you think I have nice legs and pretty eyes?"
"are you dense? how is that what you focus on?" despite the harsh undertone of her words, she can feel her body stiffening up under your watchful gaze, desperately hoping you don't realize just how badly she wants your attention. it feels pathetic, really, to be putting up a fit like this because just you spoke to someone flirtatious other than her. shit, she needs to save some face.
"yeah, because I think it's weird how you're dictating who I can speak to as though you're my girlfriend or something!"
"that's not how I'm acting--"
"yes, it is!" you scoff, stalking up to her and pointing a finger against her chest, the contact making her jerk back from the spark it leaves. "you wouldn't be this pissed if it was just about concern."
she's silent for a few seconds, her mind running through possible comebacks. the only one she can think of is a hard, "you don't know that."
you tilt your head at her, as though she's some kid in need of a scolding. it only exacerbates her frustration, causing it to flare up low in her gut. "well, if it's just about you being concerned, then let me continue talking to her. you warned me, I took it in stride, and if things go wrong, you can always rub it in my face late, okay?"
she sighs, beginning to regret having ever acted out now that this is the turn the situation is taking. you were supposed to take her words in, and do as she says. instead, you're arguing back, just like you always do. but, she knows that at this point, she'd be a hypocrite to complain about it. she knows it's why she likes you.
"you really want that?"
you cross your arms over your chest, and sevika tries not to let her eyes stray downwards. "is there a reason why I shouldn't?"
stupid mind games. sometimes, she hated being gay because of this.
she likes you, sure, but she doesn't have the patience to beat around the bush. which she's aware is hypocritical and stupid, considering that's what she's been doing this entire conversation. but, still.
so, she shrugs. "beats me."
your eyes flash with something, jaw clenching. sevika can't tell if it's a look of determination or anger.
but, what does it matter if you're spinning around to stomp back into the backyard?
she releases an exasperated breath, fishing for her cigarettes.
best friend's older sister!sevika whose voice makes you jump when you're stirring instant noodles in a frothy pot of water later that night.
"jesus, sevika!" you gasp, your other hand flying to clutch your chest. "what the fuck are you doing here?"
"it's my house, remember?" she dryly remarks, padding over to the fridge and grabbing a carton of milk. pinching the flap open, she drinks straight from it. you'd find it gross if it weren't for the way her lips wrap around the soggy cardboard material, the muscles of her neck protruding as she gulps it down.
when she bends down to put it back, you turn away, your stomach churning from how any bit of laughter is totally drained from her voice, leaving it flat and achingly unfamiliar.
you've felt guilty since the barbecue. sure, it's annoying that she makes demands of you without actually admitting her feelings. but, it's clear that she was upset in that moment. so, maybe you should've been a tad nicer.
"uh, sevika?" you meekly call out right as she's about to exit the kitchen.
she freezes in the entryway, casting you a sidelong glance over her shoulder, which is pinched from the strap of her tight tank top. god, you wanna kiss the indent it leaves.
"I..." you trail off, shifting side to side on your feet, the low bubbling of the water the only noise filling the room. you don't know what's too much or too little, so you mull over your words before tentatively saying, "you know, I'm not interested in your cousin. like, at all. I had no intention of flirting back with her, or, like, pursuing something with her."
she's silent for a few seconds, her eyes flicking away as her jaw tenses, which sends her cheeks hollowing out. you stare at her for a few seconds before focusing your attention back to stirring the noodles, needing something to occupy your thoughts other than the thick, stifling tension seizing the air.
finally, she speaks, her voice low but firm with surety. "well, I didn't want you to flirt with her... for reasons other than what I said."
your stomach tightens up in anxious, gut-wrenching excitement, forcing your mouth to remain in a clenched line. you know this isn't exactly a confession, but it's unspoken between you two -- what she means, that is. there could only be one reason other than concern that would explain how protective she was earlier. a reason that, sure, you're not certain about regarding the details or her intentions, but that nonetheless has you feeling like you could jump with the amount of energy surging through you at the mention of it. no matter how vague.
you can sense she won't say anymore, though, her body rigid with tension. so, to try to lighten the mood, your own body sagging in relief now that you two have somewhat made amends, you drawl out, "yeah, that much was clear."
she snickers, turning fully to you and propping her arm on the door frame. you expect her to give her own retort, but instead, she just... watches you. smirk slowly curling on her face, eyes crinkling in amusement, she simply stares at you.
after a few moments of feeling like the side of your head is burning from her razor-sharp gaze, you say, "what?"
the corner of her mouth quirks up further. "for someone who says it was obvious, that was a pretty big grin you had on your face just now."
you huff indignantly, ducking you head down to the noodles in order to avoid getting caught in your flustered state. "well, I'm just grinning because my noodles are almost done."
she peers at the time flashing over the stove before shaking her head and grimacing at the pot. "why are you even eating this crap at 2:00AM? we have actual food in the fridge."
"I was craving this," you defend with a squeak, shooting her what you pray is a convincing glare despite your heart racing from her earlier words. "besides, I didn't know if your family would be having the leftovers."
"don't be stupid," she chides gruffly. after a pause, she adds, "you know you're family."
this time, you can't resist the beam that overtakes your face, eyes squeezing in delight as your cheeks throb pleasantly from the joy embracing you. you've, of course, heard this sentiment from your best friend plenty of times before, but never from sevika.
"thanks," you murmur feebly, sending her a small, bash smile.
she simply nods in return, her lips pressing together as she continues observing you.
part of you basks under it. the attention of her focused grey eyes, the heavy weight of her gaze -- it all sends a thrill to you that's hot and burning, making you feel you're being revived from a lifelong slumber. how did you ever manage without the life-altering feeling which is sevika's gaze directed to you?
"so, I guess I should head up," she says, sticking a thumb behind her.
your body immediately tenses in protest. she can't leave -- not like this, not after this tender moment you two just shared. not when her presence here holds the contrast of warm assurance and ice-cold surprise that you're always craving.
a loud "no!" bursts from your lip as she's just about to turn.
when she sends you an inquisitive stare, forehead wrinkled in confusion, you feel your face heat up in embarrassment over your over-eagerness. but, it's too late to scale back, so you force yourself to proceed with, "I just-- why don't we hang out a bit? maybe watch gilmore girls. and, I don't know, share the noodles and, well, left overs."
her eyes widen, lips parting in surprise, and it almost makes you want to cackle. how could she even be surprised you want to spend time with her? are you just that good at hiding your want for her, or is she that romantically dense?
"um, yeah, okay," she says, a hand curving up along the back of her neck. "but, don't think I'll eat that crap you're making."
your shoulders ease at the joke, laughing as you wag your wooden spoon at her. "it's good, okay? I don't know why you'd deprive yourself of it."
"if I didn't deprive myself, I wouldn't have these." she flexes her bicep, and you try not to let your gaze roam over the toned muscle bulging out. no need to satisfy her that much. "and wouldn't that be a pity for you?"
you bristle, but still find yourself unable to quell the laughter that bubbles up your throat. "fuck off. my life isn't so sad that your muscles are my sanctuary."
"fair point -- maybe 'religion' is a better term."
ugh, her grin is infuriatingly coy as she heads back to the fridge, pulling out a tupperware, her veins bulging out as she grips it.
you want to fuck her so bad. and then, yell at her. and then, fuck her again.
"just, shut up and heat up the leftovers," you grumble, turning your back to her as her laugh, hearty and scratchy in all the right ways, flows from her lips.
honestly, the lack of eye contact is for both of your guys' benefit. god knows how you'll react if you see that cute gap again.
best friend's older sister!sevika who, after you two start dating, places her long fingers on your thigh when you join her family for dinner. she knows it's a bit evil of her, but she can't help it. your body is just so reactive -- a fact that she was delighted to learn upon your first time sleeping together. it just makes it so much fun to toy with you like this.
your leg immediately flinches when her fingernails skim along your skin, and she'd probably smile if she wasn't so well-trained in public play to know exactly how to keep a straight face.
but, you? she knows you're struggling. she can feel it in the way you shift in your seat, shoulders rolling as her warm palm flattens against your skin, her fingers sinking into the plush of your thigh. or how your body suddenly lurches forward when she suddenly pinches her nails into the skin, causing everyone at the table to dart concerned glances your way.
you sheepishly laugh it off, shaking your head and saying, "sorry, I, um-- I just got a weird shiver."
sevika honestly feels impressed that you're able to keep your cool this well, glancing at you with a raised eyebrow. she knows it probably goes against the whole supportive girlfriend thing, but seeing you manage to remain calm only makes her want to test you even more.
and so, she inches her fingers up so that they smooth along the tender skin of your inner thigh. you immediately stiffen up, your back straightening to an almost comedic right angle. sevika's mouth twists, trying to hold in a chuckle at how you writhe when her blunt nails begin to trace shapes into the hot patch of skin. god, she wants to dip her fingers in further, feel the tight heat of your pussy wrap around her digit as she pumps it in and out of you.
she clears her own throat to cut off her breaths from getting too shallow. god, she needs a cold shower or some shit. plus, the entire point was to get you hot and bothered, not her.
trying to gather her bearings, she presses her fingers into the sensitive area, slightly digging in the curves of her nails, trying to replicate she sharp sting you feel when she sinks her teeth into that spot before eating you out.
it seems se's successful, based on the way your legs shift again, pressing together and trapping her hand there. and your cute face is noticeably distracted, expression glazed over, lips hanging open.
when your fingers curl around her wrist, keeping her hand there, she smirks behind the rim of her glass, taking a careful sip before wrenching her hand free from your grip, continuing with her meal.
through the animated conversation her sister and old man are having, she can hear you grunt in frustration.
but, she doesn't even turn to you. after all, what would be the fun if she just gave you what you wanted?
best friend's older sister!sevika who shakes you from your deep sleep when you're curled up on the mattress in her living room, your best friend fast asleep on the couch. before you can mumble incoherently, your eyes barely making out her broad frame through the sleep-tinged blur, she presses a finger to your mouth, quietly shushing you.
you nod, your heavy eyes blinking rapidly to register what's going on. but, you can barely get a whisper in before sevika scoops you up, her strong arms easily carrying you up the stairs to her bedroom. you have to bite back a gasp at the sudden manhandling, though a spike of arousal zips through you from how easily she takes you to her bedroom, dropping you unceremoniously onto her navy blankets.
you frown at her, eyes sharpened into a glare. "sevika, wha--"
she plants her lips on you, crawling on top of you and pinning your body to the bed with hers. she's sloppy and ungraceful with it, shoving her tongue into your mouth and swirling it around yours as a hand slides up to loosely grip your throat.
"you didn't think I'd leave you hanging, did you?" she mumbles against your lips, her hand drifting down your body to start fiddling with the waistband of your pajama shorts.
"well, you already did once, so I wouldn't be surprised if it happened again," you murmur against her prodding mouth, trying to keep your voice dignified in light of all the pants and whines beginning to crawl up your throat.
"awe, c'mon, baby," she snickers, pressing an open-mouthed kiss to your cheek while the rest of you practically combusts from the low, scolding tone she takes when calling you that. "even I have my limits."
and, oh, how fucking good it feels for sevika's limits to be broken, you think as she pounds into you with her dark purple strap-on, her hand over your mouth as she pumps her hips steadily, hissing whenever her bed frame bumps too loudly against the wall.
you wrap your legs around her, nails raking up her back as the toy plunges into you over and over again, stretching your walls taut. it feels good, so good, the dull ache of her nearly-too-big dildo making your entire pussy throb in a way that makes you feel impossibly full.
"listen to that," she whispers against your ear, the hot moist of her breath making you break out into shivers. "your pussy is soaking my new sheets. such a mess you're making."
god, you just leak even more from those words, the mix of your juices and the lube creating deliciously loud squelching noises in her room, only growing more pointed and firm when she begins to drill particularly hard, intentional thrusts into you. the movements have the bulb her of dick pushing against your g-spot with every rock of her body, and it sends a warm tingle through you, wrapping your nerves in pleasure and sparking them to life.
you whine against her hand, eyes rolling back when her cold, mechanical finger begins to flick along your clit. the cool, steel-hard texture of it against your swollen little nub has your body arching up, each brush and flick feeling so heightened through all the other sensations running through you.
"yeah," she chuckles darkly, grazing her teeth along your earlobe. "you like that, don't you? getting this pussy slutted out, having me fucking up your guts and making room for my babies?"
your hips jolt up at those words, a loud whine erupting from your mouth before you can stop it. sevika hisses at it, pressing her mouth to yours, her thighs smacking against yours as she continues drilling you into her mattress.
"be quiet," she rasps, her breaths shattering into uneven little pants. "you want everyone in this house to know what a slut you are? you want everyone to know you couldn't last a night in here without getting dicked down by your best friend's sister?"
you can barely respond, your entire body set aflame with the pleasure of her on top of you, surrounding you with nothing but warm skin, hard muscle and filthy, nasty little noises.
"ah," you moan quietly against her mouth, fingers tracing the indents your nails have left in her back. "feels s'good, I just-- I can't--"
"I know, baby, I know," she grunts, fingers wrapping around your jaw and shaking your face like you're her personal doll. "no need to worry your pretty head with talking, yeah? just be good and let me cream this pussy."
and so, you do. over and over and over again.
best friend's older sister!sevika who tries not to smirk too hard when her sister asks over breakfast why you're wearing a turtleneck in the middle of july.
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moonstruckme · 22 hours ago
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hai lovie!!! im not sure of youve written something like this for emt!marauders yet but could you write something where they come home from work to reader lying on the floor on the hallway due to having low blood pressure and shed tried to go get something to eat or something but had started feeling faint and had to lie down? and then when they come up to reader she starts to cry because being unwell makes her anxious (im not fussed if you dont add that last part up to you <3). i had really low blood pressure the other day and bad to lie on the floor for a good two hours and it really stressed me out :< anyway thanks lovie i hope youre doing well !!!!
Thanks for requesting <3
cw: mention of dizziness, nausea, worries about being alone when unwell and also being unwell in general
emt!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1k words
You’re half propped up with your elbow on a step when you hear the front door open. 
“Hello?” 
“Hello!” comes James’ chipper reply, followed by Sirius’ groan and the clunking of shoes as he no doubt kicks them off, beelining for the couch. After a moment of you not appearing to greet them, James asks, “Where are you?” 
“I’m—here.” You soften your voice when Sirius walks by the stairs, his step faltering as he locks eyes with you. 
His eyebrows bunch, concerned before he really knows why. “What’re you doing?” 
“I’m…” You shrug limply, trying on a helpless smile. Tears threaten to spill over from the way your eyes squish up. “I don’t feel right.” 
Sirius has only taken his first, slow step toward you, bemusement written across his features, before James and Remus are behind him at the base of the stairs. 
“Oh. Hi, angel.” James’ voice matches his expression, all gentleness, and worry hidden beneath counterfeit cheer. “Having a little lie down?” 
“Yeah,” you say. Sirius’ touch is a relief as he reaches you. He cups your face and feels your forehead, brows stitched together. You’re happy to be in capable hands. “I started to fall, so I just laid down here. I’m a bit dizzy.” 
There’s only so many of you that can fit on the stairs. James makes it to you next, crouching beside Sirius to take your hand in his and press his fingers to your pulse, so Remus is left peering over them both. He frowns, looking conflicted about his inability to help and worried in general. You try another smile for his sake; unfortunately, this time, the tears do spill. 
“Hey, don’t do that,” Sirius says, no real chiding in his tone as he knuckles them from your cheeks. 
“Sorry.” You force yourself to breathe, but new ones come anyway. It’s a slow sort of cry, the result of a good long while feeling sorry for yourself. “I just, I felt sick, so I tried to go upstairs to the toilet, but then I started to faint and I didn’t think I could make it back down to my phone, and I didn’t know when you would be home, or if anyone would find me…” 
“We’re here now, though, sweetheart,” Remus stops you gently. “It all worked out alright. You’re okay.” 
“Yeah.” You wipe underneath your eyes. “I think my blood pressure just dropped all of a sudden or something, but I still feel weird. It was scary.” 
“I think you’re right,” James says. He runs his thumb over your wrist. “I mean, I’d like to think it’s just because we’re home and you’re pleased to see us, but your heart’s going pretty fast, m’love. How long ago did you lie down here?” 
“I don’t know,” you reply, sniffling, feeling silly. “I don’t have my phone. Less than an hour, I think.” 
Remus hums. “That’s still a long while.” 
Honestly, you feel better just having your boyfriends here with you. Partly because of the security, of course, that you know you won’t faint and hit your head with no one to help you, but also, perhaps, there’s a small part of you that enjoys their fussing. The concerned set of Sirius’ brow, the way Remus’ mouth puckers thoughtfully, how James keeps rubbing his thumb over your wrist like he can soothe your heart back into its regular rhythm. 
“Well, then.” Sirius pats your hip, rising from his crouch. “Not much point in figuring it all out here, is there? C’mon, pretty girl, that step has to be killing your side.” 
It’s true; you think the edge of the step probably leaves an indent in your waist after you let Sirius haul you up, supporting you down the stairs and over to the couch. 
“I don’t feel as dizzy as I was expecting,” you admit. “Maybe I was overreacting.” 
“You?” Sirius exclaims, feigning astoundment. 
“Better to be safe,” says Remus. He claims a spot next to you quickly, as though seizing his opportunity. It makes your lips tug. “I’m glad you were careful, love.” 
You lean your head on his shoulder in a silent plea for coddling; he appeases you, pressing his lips to your hair while Sirius pinches the skin of your forearm gently. You watch him with mild interest. 
“When was the last time you drank water?” he asks. 
“Um…” You think back. 
Sirius lets go of your skin and tuts. “Yeah, seems like it’s been long enough for you not to remember.” 
“On it,” James announces, coming back from the kitchen with a large glass of water. He passes it to you over the back of the couch, and it’s so full a tiny bit spills over the rim onto your wrist, making you shiver. “It’s more common than you’d think for dehydration to do that to you. Gotta be careful.” 
“Yes,” says Remus drily, though his arm comes around your shoulders. “Rather easily avoidable.” 
You shrink, mumbling, “Sorry,” into your glass. 
James awws and bends over the back of the couch to plant a kiss on your head, his good cheer restored, genuinely now. “We all forget sometimes, lovie.” 
“Don’t enable her,” Sirius tells him. He cradles your arm in his hand, stroking the skin he’d pinched as though in apology for his treatment of it. “Don’t listen to him. It’s a grave oversight and you must repent forever.” 
“Forever?” Your smile still feels weak, but you’re coming back to yourself some. “How will I do that?” 
“Mm,” Sirius takes to kissing your arm instead, mumbling with a sternness that borders upon silly, “start with filling your water bottle every day before leaving the house, and at least three times after that.” 
You go quiet, gaze sliding to Remus skeptically. 
He raises an eyebrow. “What?” 
“Is that…really how much I’m supposed to have?”
His other eyebrow lifts, too. “Yes.” 
“Every day?” 
“Yes.” Remus laughs, exasperated. “Yes, that’s the water intake your body needs.” 
“There’s no way everyone’s doing that.” 
“They’re not,” James agrees. “Instead, everyone is getting dizzy and calling us so we can go pick them up from halfway up the stairs.” 
You bring the glass back to your lips, muttering, “I didn’t call, you just found me.” 
James kisses your head again, fiercely. “And we always will, lucky girl.”
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kashverse · 2 days ago
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Imagine someone making mama reader cry and minisukuna is just roasting who man her cry’s ass, while sukuna is trying to hold back from murder
i didn't wanna make the mamakuna's reading this cry, so have a bit of banter instead. i hope this is what you were requesting for!
rule number 1 in a sukuna family barbecue is to kiss the cook—aka mamakuna, aka you.
rule number 1.2? only babykuna and sukuna can kiss the chef. no exceptions.
but the most important rule—the one etched in stone, the one more sacred than sukuna’s secret steak rub recipe—is rule number 2:
never. insult. the cook.
so when yuki, choso’s plus one, decides to run her mouth at the absolute wrong time, saying, “not gonna lie, this chicken is kinda dry,” there is an immediate, deafening silence. choso, sitting next to her, freezes mid-bite, eyes darting around like he’s witnessing a live execution. nanami takes a slow sip of his beer, very wisely deciding he wants no part in whatever is about to happen. gojo, ever the shit-stirrer, grins and leans in. “oh-ho-ho, you done fucked up.” meanwhile, you? you just blink.
"oh?"
it’s just one word, but it’s enough to send chills down the spines of everyone within earshot. sukuna, who had been manning the grill (read: standing around looking important while you did all the real work), slowly sets down the tongs.
his jaw twitches. his veins pop. he looks two seconds away from committing murder.
"who made the food, yuki?" he asks, voice dangerously calm. yuki, still blissfully unaware of the shitstorm she’s just walked into, shrugs. "i dunno, the caterer?"
sukuna exhales through his nose, like he’s actively trying to keep his soul from leaving his body.
"your caterer is literally sitting right there," choso hisses under his breath, eyes darting to you. yuki, now finally putting two and two together, has the audacity to look sheepish. "oh. uhh…"
but before she can say anything else—
"DODOHEAD!!"
everyone turns to look at babykuna, who is fuming, tiny fists clenched, eyes ablaze with unwavering rage. "how dare you," she huffs, looking as offended as if yuki had personally spit on a framed picture of you.
"i—it’s not that deep—"
“SHAME ON YOU, POOPIEHEAD!!” babykuna stomps her foot, dramatically clutching her heart like she’s a widow in a soap opera. "mama’s food is the best in the whole world!"
"i didn't mean—"
"take it back!" babykuna demands. yuki blinks, caught between disbelief and fear.
"uh…?"
"TAKE. IT. BACK."
babykuna’s arm lifts. her grip tightens around the precious stuffed labubu in her hand. and before anyone can stop her—
"oh, hell no," sukuna mutters, finally snapping.
"you listen here, you ungrateful shit—"
"okay!" choso interjects, physically holding his brother back before this barbecue turns into a crime scene. 
"yuki," he hisses, “apologize before you get us both killed.” yuki, now 100% convinced she is not leaving this barbecue alive, raises her hands.
"okay, okay! i’m sorry!"
"say it like you mean it!" babykuna shouts, labubu still armed and ready.
"i mean it!!"
yuki, now sweating bullets, looks at you.
"your food is great. i love it. i’m sorry."
babykuna narrows her suspicious little eyes.
"hmph."
after ten long seconds of dramatic silence, she finally lowers labubu.
"...i forgive you."
yuki exhales in relief.
"but don’t do it again, dodohead!"
sukuna grumbles under his breath, still looking like he wants to throw hands. but then you, grinning, lean over and kiss his cheek. "down, boy," you tease. "i don’t need you getting blood on my good plates."
he grunts. “whatever.” but he still sends a glare yuki’s way.
“next time, i will let babykuna throw the labubu.”
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astonmartinii · 13 hours ago
Text
other side of the moon - chapter six | formula one imagine
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chapter six: fireproof
pairing: fem retired formula one driver reader x ??? fem retired formula one driver reader x platonic!kimi antonelli
testing is finally here and after the car launch, y/n is not looking forward to the mercedes garage
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR | SERIES MASTERLIST
the day and a half after the car launch before max was called into the factory by red bull was a slice of peace y/n had longed for for three years. but also one she couldn’t help think would be the last bit of peace she would be afforded this season.
the pair woke up the morning after the launch, bundled up together and hair sticking up in every direction.
“good morning” y/n said, words smothered by max’s chest. the dutchman grumbled to himself as he wrapped his arms around her even tighter.
“max, your phone won’t stop vibrating - please tell whoever it is to fuck off”
max groaned, flipped over and grabbed his phone. with his eyes shut, max jammed a couple buttons and suddenly the gravely voice of helmut marko rung out.
“max! where are you? the team have just informed me that you left early and are not at the hotel?”
the dutchman finally opened his eyes. he pulled y/n back into his side and pressed a kiss to her forehead.
“helmut, it’s too early for this many questions.”
“i asked you one, very straight forward question, max.”
“i’ll be at the factory tomorrow, don’t worry.”
helmut sighed down the phone, “wherever you are, make sure you’re not late and not spotted doing anything untoward.”
“me? untoward? helmut, i didn’t know you thought so low of me.”
“the only reason i believe you is because you’re on your best behaviour with y/n back, maybe we should add her to our payroll as well.”
y/n couldn’t stop herself before she burst out laughing. she smacked a hand over her mouth but it was too late. helmut hummed.
“i see. good morning miss y/ln. make sure he’s in top condition for tomorrow.”
“will do, helmut.”
max hung up as soon as he could and threw his phone down the bed. he smiles down at y/n, “that’s not exactly how i pictured my first morning in bed with you.”
“so you’ve pictured this?” y/n questions, raising an eyebrow.
“no? yes? maybe? i definitely have but i don’t want to creep you out so what do you want to hear?”
y/n laughs as he buries his head in the pillow, whining in embarrassment.
“maxy…” she sings and pokes his back.
“don’t look at me! i’m a freak!” max yells, muffled in the pillow.
“but you’re a freak for me?”
“isn’t it obvious?”
y/n finally gets max to lessen his grip on the pillow and look back up at her. there’s a dusting of pink on his face and a concerned look in his eye.
“don’t worry, i like it. as long as you’re only a freak for me.”
max ducked his head again, “as happy as i am to hear that, can we refrain from saying it like that? i was proud i managed to wake up without morning wood and you’re really testing that resolve right now.”
y/n’s laugh reverberated around the room. without the needy meows of brando, the pair could stay snuggled in the bed for much longer than usual.
“max?” y/n asked, the dutchman had rearranged them so that he could be the little spoon and had his head resting on her chest, “please don’t be sorry for your feelings. they don’t make me uncomfortable and unlike others you didn’t just assume i reciprocated. i like what we have and i want to see where it could go, but i want to take it slow. i don’t want people butting in and adding their two pence. i just want you - and our furry babies.”
y/n could see the smile breaking out on max’s face before he even lifted his head from her chest.
“i said i just want to exist with you,” max said, “that will never, ever change.”
the dutchman’s eyes flicked down to her lips and the blush returned when he realised he wasn’t too subtle about it. y/n gives him a small nod and max leans in.
“can i?”
“please,” y/n whispered as max’s lips connected with hers. it was a small peck, just a press of lips, but it was enough. both pulled back and smiled, happy to breathe the same air for a while. y/n’s hand wrapped around his nape and pulled him in for another one. this kiss lasted longer, the pair pouring their years of pining into it, communicating something words could not describe.
for a moment y/n wished that she hadn’t returned to formula one. she wished that this would be her life. happy in her coop in west london with her and max’s cats waiting for the dutchman to come home, far away from her past ghosts and the sport that nearly killed her.
“will you still find me attractive in mercedes kit?”
“that’s a stupid question. you’re the most beautiful person in the world. yes, i would prefer if it were my number and my colours, but i’ll live with it if it means seeing you at every race.”
y/n giggled, the dutchman pressed another kiss to her lips because he could.
“i know you’ll be rooting for kimi this season, but i’ll win every race for you. even if the red bull is a shit box, i’ll fight everyone to bring that trophy home to you.”
“my singular monza trophy is a little lonely,” y/n said, “but your wins are yours, not anyone else’s”
y/n pushed back the duvet and started to get out of bed, much to the chagrin of max. despite his attempted puppy-dog eyes, y/n shuffled into her slippers and made her way to the kitchen.
“find something good to watch, i’ll cook up one last cheat meal for you,” y/n’s voice called from the hallway. max stayed led in the bed, a dumb smile on his face. it all felt a bit too good to be true and he hoped those in the paddock who had already caused some trouble would stay out of this.
despite another night of snuggles, max did not want to leave for milton keynes the next morning. y/n had made him a breakfast sandwich for the ride, but it did little to console the young dutchman even though the pair would be apart for just two days before they’d reunite in monaco and fly out to bahrain.
“i don’t wanna go… i want to stay here, you’re so much nicer to look at than christian!”
max was dragging his feet as he made his way to the hire car. he even tried to delay his departure by roping frank into a conversation but y/n had thought of that and rung down to reception in advance.
“it’s like you want me gone!” max cried as he put his bags in the car.
y/n laced her fingers in his, “you know i’ll miss you, but i don’t want to hear helmut’s voice any more than i have to, so you have to go. i’ll see you in monaco.”
max pulled her into one last kiss and reluctantly got into the car. y/n waved him off as he disappeared into the streets of london.
“finally!”
a yell boomed out in the garage, making y/n jump and stick her keys out as a makeshift weapon. frank stood at the entrance of the garage with a huge smile on his face. y/n calmed down when she saw the older man.
“frank! that scared the shit out of me! how long have you been there?”
“long enough.”
frank looked very smug. y/n made her way to the entrance, pointedly ignoring the older man.
“don’t be mad, i won’t tell anyone. i’m just glad you finally realised what was right in front of you.”
did everyone see it before her? it certainly seems that way.
“we’re taking it slow, so i’d appreciate if you kept this under your hat, frank.”
“of course, miss y/ln. would you like me to arrange for another parking spot for your flat?”
y/n tried to keep a stern look but she just couldn’t help it and smiled at the older man.
“that would be lovely, thank you.”
her apartment was quiet without max. she didn’t want to say she missed him just yet, but she had to busy herself with something before she fell down that hole. she needed to pack and get a flight back to monaco so she could spend a little more time with the cats before pre-season testing kicked off the season.
y/n’s phone buzzed with a message.
kimi: y/nnnnnnnn huge favour to ask! george can only give me a lift back to london before we go to bahrain so could i maybe get a lift to brackley???
y/n: if you buy my coffee at each stop you’ve got a deal.
kimi: yes, yes. i know your order - THANK YOU !
she better get to packing.
the italian stood on the side of the road, wrapped up in two coats, a hat and a scarf. ollie stood beside him in just a t-shirt, some shorts and a pair of flip flops, showing off his british aversion to the cold.
y/n pulled up beside the pair and winded down the window. “don’t you know hitchhikers are dangerous?”
kimi smiled and gave ollie a quick hug, popping the boot and shoving his small suitcase in. the italian slipped into the passenger seat and waved at ollie.
“why didn’t i have the idea to ask you to be my mentor?” ollie whined, “esteban is great and he has already given me a ton of lifts but you’re you!”
“snooze you lose” kimi said, poking out his tongue.
“esteban is great ollie, don’t believe all this shit about him being a bad teammate. he’s lovely and will be more than happy to help you out. however, we do need to go because i need to drop off this princess and get a flight to monaco. ciao!”
y/n stood on the gas and flew off down the street. from the corner of her eye, y/n could see kimi studying her. this wasn’t too strange for the italian, he often just stared at her, amazed that she had even agreed.
“i can feel you staring kimi, do you have a question?”
“why are you so happy?”
y/n laughed at the bluntness. the italian sputtered, “i mean i’m happy you’re happy, but i can’t help but be suspicious. i haven’t heard a peep from you since the car launch… and a little birdy told me you left with a certain someone.”
“it’s been two days, kimi!”
“you’re still smiling, you can’t stop and considering you smiled maybe twice in the first couple days i knew you - this means something!”
“fine! you caught me. i did go home with max. i’m not saying anymore than we’re happy and we’re taking it slow. i’m telling you because i believe for a good mentor relationship i should be completely open, as should you. also you’re like a quasi-son to me so there’s also that. do not tell anyone else, i’m serious. not even ollie.”
kimi whined at that, “but i tell ollie everything!”
“well not this. you saw how some of the people, including your teammate are with me and max, i do not want to give them any ammunition, okay?”
kimi hummed to himself, his brain whirring so loudly that even y/n could hear it over the music and the road. “speaking of those who WILL be without ammunition because i WILL keep my mouth zipped shut… how are we actually planning on tackling george this season?”
y/n was making the turn off of the motorway and towards brackley as she chuckled, “aside from physically tackling him at testing? i am joking, by the way. kimi, i don’t want you to worry about george anywhere but the track. he talks a big talk, but he’s very easy to frustrate when he’s not winning. don’t give him the rise he’ll want, okay?”
the tension rose in the car, it had all been fun and games up until this point, cocktails parties and car launches. but now it was getting real. y/n had the voice in the back of her head that worried that her off-track drama with the other drivers could impact kimi’s career.
“please stop worrying, y/n. i know what you’re thinking, but i am capable of handling it myself. i may only be eighteen but i’m not afraid of anyone.”
y/n pulled up outside of the mercedes factory and turned to kimi. she grabbed his hands, “promise me, kimi. promise me that if the drama with me gets too much, you will say something. i know it’s your dream to work with me, but make sure i do not interfere with your career.”
kimi scoffed, “them being afraid of you will never be your fault, you know-”
“it doesn’t matter if my fault or not, if their pettiness fucks with you, i won’t be able to forgive myself…”
just as they spoke, george pulled up beside them in his mercedes. the brit wasn’t alone in his car however. a brunette woman sat in the passenger seat, and much like george, her eyes narrowed at the sight of y/n.
“that’s carmen, george’s girlfriend. she doesn’t usually come to the factory with him?” kimi gasped, “maybe she’s here to stake her claim on george, as if you’d want him anyway…”
y/n laughed as kimi got out of the car. the italian grabbed his stuff from the boot and walked round to the window. y/n rolled it down and the two did their handshake.
“enjoy the prep, bunny, don’t make too much mess. see you in bahrain!”
the moment was cut short by someone clearing their throat. carmen had rolled down her window and was looking at kimi, less than impressed. the italian squeaked a quick goodbye and shuffled towards the entrance.
y/n tried not to make eye contact with carmen as she inputted the airport’s address into her gps. she was baffled by the news that george even had a girlfriend, not that she wanted kimi or the couple to know that. how long had they been together? did she know about y/n and about george’s weird feud with her? too many questions and not enough answers.
george and carmen made their way past y/n’s car and stopped just in front of the entrance, pointedly in y/n’s eye line. the two kissed, messily for people their age, and just to sum up her return so far, george kept eye contact with y/n the entire time, his hand wandering lower and lower on carmen.
2025 was the year of psychological warfare it seemed. y/n could work with that.
she sped out of the car park with new vigour. if psychological warfare was what george was ordering, y/n needed to know everything about everyone. she had stayed away from the drama surrounding formula one in her three years away from the sport, but it was time to go full gossip girl.
it’s crazy how much you can find in an hour in an airline bar about your former colleagues. y/n’s phone started ringing loudly, earning her some dirty looks in the lounge.
“maxy! did you know that george dated nyck’s sister?” y/n said, shovelling the free nuts in her mouth, “and that lando and pierre once liked the same girl in dubai?”
“why oh why are you telling me about this?” max said.
“because that prick wants psychological warfare, so i have to know everything!”
max hummed, not convinced. “am i like missing something?”
“i took kimi to brackley this morning and was treated to a lovely show from george and carmen. the weirdo kept eye contact with me the entire time! so if he wants to play it like that, i gotta know my enemies.”
“as weird as this all is, i’m glad to see you’re so into all of this, miss detective.”
y/n laughed, “i know i’m reading way too much about all of this, but i swear to god if he tries to fuck with kimi or you, i’ll play dirty if i have to. i mean i just don’t understand why he’s being such an asshole now about everything i supposedly did when he has a girlfriend - insecure much?”
max laughed down the line, they really were so much more alike than people would think. hearing her now, max wished she was back in the paddock for qatar and abu dhabi last year just to see what kind of revenge she could’ve thought up.
“anyway, maxy, are you still at the factory?”
“yeah, we’re just on a break, i’m outside getting some air and i didn’t know whether you were on the plane yet or not - you know you could’ve taken air max if you wanted to?”
y/n smiled, “i didn’t need your plane for a trip to monaco, silly! i’ll only be on the flight for a little while anyway and i’m only going because i’m having withdrawal symptoms from my babies!”
“why would you say this, now i want to see them!”
the boarding sign popped up, “ah! i gotta go maxy, i’ll text you when i’m back at yours - what time does the cat sitter go?”
“she will have left like an hour or so before you get back. stay safe, i -”
there was chatter in the background, “i gotta go, bye!”
max hung up quickly. y/n was left to her thoughts again and just how much life can change. this time three years ago she was making notes about the season coming, turns to watch and previous first lap incidents and now she’s compiling gossip on the grid’s personal lives? part of her wanted to be ashamed, but in the same vain, she knew that her adversaries hadn’t spared a moment for introspection.
max’s apartment in monaco was alight with the impatient meows from brando, sassy and jimmy. the cats yowled like they hadn’t been fed in days, although clarissa, the cat sitter, had sent max and y/n nearly hourly updates on them.
“oh my babies! momma missed you so much!” y/n said, abandoning her suitcase at the door and ushering the cats towards the couch. once she was sat, brando bullied his way onto her lap, his spot, and jimmy and sassy snuggled up beside her as closely as possible.
she pulled out her phone and snapped a quick picture of herself and the cats and sent it to max.
max: all my favourites in one place, you’re making listening to christian drone on even harder
y/n: you better keep listening, maxy, don’t want anyone else winning this season do you?
max: i do hate losing…
y/n smiled to herself, there was no lying to now, this place with the cats and max felt like home. the most at home y/n had felt for years.
“right, momma needs to shower and cook, babies!” brando did not look impressed but consoled himself by going back to grooming an equally unimpressed jimmy.
y/n rustled around max’s wardrobe trying to find a smaller towel for her hair. max wasn’t the most organised, especially with a wardrobe where he could just shut the door and forget the mess behind it. she finally got the towel loose, but with the last yank, a small book came flying out of the wardrobe.
the book was a small leather-bound book, clearly loved, bursting at the seams with use. y/n flicked open the book, scanning a couple of the pages. she could recognise the handwriting anywhere, was this max’s diary?
y/n flicked through a couple more of the pages before she landed on a page that boldly stated “fuck lando” in bold capitals. oh? the page was dated for a day in january 2020, just before she started her formula one career.
she knew this was a massive invasion of privacy, but max had never mentioned having a bust up with lando around that time - her curiosity had gotten the better of her.
i don’t know what lando’s problem is? i was on a discord call with him, george and alex this evening and he was in such a mood with me. it was all about y/n as usual with him, he’s being proper weird about her. of course we’ve already started training and discussing racing lines? we’re best friends. it’s almost like he knows i have feelings for her? but i know i haven’t been THAT obvious, at least not as bad as him and george. they think i don’t know, but they must think i’m dumb or blind (or both). he’s going to ruin his friendship with her if he’s not careful. i have loved y/n for as long as i can remember, but i don’t ever intend on making that her problem - why would she ever want to be with me? they assume because they’ve known her so long that they have this weird claim on her. i don’t know - i have a bad feeling about how this might all play out… i’ll just be there for y/n, she’s going to need it…
y/n slapped the book shut, feeling guilty about just how much she had read. max had liked her for that long? even when she was a jittery rookie with hormonal acne and way too much to say. and lando has always had this problem? there was never any chance of them being good teammates was there?
it feels like there’s a surprise around every corner since y/n reopened the pandora’s box that is formula one. how much was there left to reveal? to hurt her? can she handle what other secrets the sport has waiting for her?
but on the other side, if she had stayed in the shadows, y/n would’ve never known about max’s feelings and would never have the opportunity for what she feels right now.
y/n tucked the book back in the wardrobe and tried to wash the guilt off in the shower.
bahrain international circuit
testing was a boring affair for everyone that wasn’t in or working on the car. y/n was on her third coffee of the morning just out of pure boredom. kimi was in the car for the morning session and despite him paying her salary, toto did not seem like he’d make good conversation based on the frown on his face.
y/n saw sky making their way back down the pit lane and ducked back into the drivers’ rooms. because timing and fate loved y/n, george was leaving his just at the same moment.
it took a concerted effort not to roll her eyes as she forced out a quick good morning. george stopped in his tracks.
“good morning to you too?”
y/n gave him a nod and continued to kimi’s room, george grabbed her hand.
“are we going to have a problem the entire season? all of kimi’s career?”
“why would i have a problem, george? is there a reason i should have a problem?”
george huffed, “listen to me. we used to be so close… i wasn’t the one who crashed into you, why are you treating me like this?”
“george i’m not treating you like anything! 19 other drivers didn’t hear from me, you’re not special.”
y/n took a sip of her coffee, trying to school her heart rate, “you may have not crashed into me, but you hardly said much afterwards. you didn’t even come and visit me in the hospital? you didn’t post or say a single thing about me? you barely could bring yourself to say my name, so please spare me the lecture.”
george opened his mouth to respond but stopped, he tried to make eye contact with y/n but she avoided it.
“i didn’t think you wanted to see anyone to do with formula one! and you’re you! you hate dumb shit like instagram dedications and all that stuff…”
“you and your little partner in crime seem to be baffled about how max was the one who slipped through the cracks and stayed in my life. well read between the lines, idiot! his dedication to me is still pinned on his account, my number is on his helmet and he made the effort after the crash! you did nothing and you still expect me to coddle you?”
george tried to interject, “no! i think you’ve said enough already, george. you say all of this shit about how i led you on, but now you’re bringing up old drama when you’ve been in a relationship for years? so what’s the real reason? because so help me god, you fuck with kimi and i burn this whole place down.”
just behind george, y/n saw toto come into view. the austrian’s face told her that he had heard everything.
“well wasn’t that just great, thank you, you two. next time you have a domestic at track, please lower your voice, the entire garage now knows your business.”
“toto, i can assure you i will be nothing less than professional this season. winning with mercedes is my top priority, y/n will learn her place in this garage.”
even toto seemed taken aback by george’s words. y/n turned, her shoulder knocking george’s on the way past, “i think toto is well aware of who he hired and i know my place, just like kimi knows his… don’t crane your neck too much looking up at him on the podium.”
y/n shut the door to kimi’s driver room, and slid down to the floor. it was only the first day of testing and she’s exhausted. just outside the room she can hear george and toto still talking.
“i’m just saying i think it’s insane and honestly a little disrespectful that you hired her to begin with, toto.”
“i hired her because she was a talented driver and is willing to mentor kimi. i was not aware you two had a problem, and the fact that i’ve heard so much about it now without knowing what it actually is makes me think that the problem was in fact YOU. now calm down and get ready for your session.”
okay, maybe not all hope was lost. but y/n knew that this was just the start, the real racing had yet to begin and who knows how far george could take it, especially if the mercedes is competitive and especially if he finds out about her and max.
y/n popped open her laptop to keep track of kimi’s times on track but found herself struggling to keep her eyes open. by the time her impromptu nap had finished, kimi was making his way back into the garage, finishing the morning session. y/n made her way back into the garage to greet him as he made his way out of the car.
the session looked positive for the italian, but the pair were still anxious to see how george would perform, considering both were on the same program for the day. when kimi lifted his helmet, the two made eye contact, the italian’s eyes were so expressive that y/n could already hear the excited chatter.
“oh my god, y/n that was amazing! i know i’ve driven f1 cars before but knowing it’s actually mine for the season? wow!”
“well i’m glad you enjoyed it, let’s get some electrolytes in you before we sit down to analyse everything.”
the pair headed for the mercedes hospitality, with the other morning drivers doing the same throughout the paddock. during y/n’s nap she had missed the only real incident of the day, but a certain spaniard was about to make sure she knew.
“hey! antonelli!”
kimi’s head whipped around to see an angry carlos sainz charging towards him. the spaniard was clearly taking advantage of the lack of media outlets allowed at testing, getting in kimi’s face.
“you might be a rookie, but you’ll stay out of my way, got it? impede me like that again and we’ll see what happens!”
y/n pulled kimi behind her and jabbed her finger at carlos’ chest. “you self-important asshole, he didn’t impede you it’s testing. i know you’re at williams this season, so you’re going to have to invent a storyline for yourself, but trust me, this is not the one you want.”
“stay out of this y/ln, why don’t you stick to hopping into whoever’s winning’s bed, huh?”
y/n let out a sarcastic laugh, not caring about the small crowd forming around them. “your glory days, well whatever you call being stuck in charles’ shadow, playing politics with daddy to get given wins at ferrari only to be cast aside when you got a bit too big for your boots, are over. don’t be the bitter old bitch that makes rookies’ lives hell? oh wait, you’ve always been that way haven’t you?”
“you are a perpetual victim, y/n. that was years ago, get over it.”
“and yet you still act the exact same way. telling, really.”
carlos stayed quiet this time and y/n took that as the chance to guide kimi to hospitality. with their backs turned, “she won’t always be there for you, rookie! she can’t sleep with all of the stewards and she won’t be in the office to bat her eyelashes. so watch your back.”
y/n kept walking despite kimi tugging on her arm, wanting to retaliate. “stop. let him make a fool of himself.”
despite y/n trying to de-escalate the situation, max was less willing to do so. the dutchman had only heard a fraction but that was enough to rear the head of mad max.
“you think you’re so cute with this shit don’t you, sainz,” max said, looming over the spaniard, “you people never change, it’s pathetic.”
“the only thing that’s pathetic here is you, being her lap dog - and we’re meant to be scared of you? all we gotta do is flash an ankle or raise a hand and you’ll be eating out of our palm.”
max’s hands were shaking by his side and it took everything inside of him not to lunge at carlos. y/n’s grip on kimi tightened when jos was brought up, the crowd around them tensing as well.
“i don’t know what she does for you, but you surely can’t still be falling for it all these years later. i remember at toro rosso when you’d wake up the whole camp screaming in your motorhome and you’d call her crying. a four-time world champion and you still go crawling back to her.”
“she’s worth more than you could ever wish to be. i don’t know what propaganda your dad or lando has been feeding you, but you’re a grown man, you’re too old to be falling for it. now leave her and kimi alone. i’d threaten you, but it’s unlikely that williams will be anywhere near me this season.”
max gave one last look to y/n before running back towards the red bull garage. the crowd that had formed chattered amongst themselves and started to disperse. carlos looked enraged but backed off, not without one final glare towards the italian.
“i didn’t know formula one was just this dramatic,” kimi said, “i need to work on my insults!”
y/n laughed, but a voice from behind her stopped her dead in her tracks.
“always the centre of drama, aren’t you y/n? always looking for trouble.”
zak brown.
fin.
note: wow this took me so long to write and i kinda hate it! i am in such a rut rn idk what to do ? but i hope you guys enjoyed it anyway!
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voidingintotheshout · 1 day ago
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Sorry op. I needed more hope:
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If you’re on Tumblr, and you’re in the United States then Donald Trump is probably trying to make your life more difficult for any one of a number of reasons. I want you to take my trans friend’s advice and control the things you can as a way to give yourself a little bit more feeling of power and confidence. Finish a puzzle, write a short story and post it on your refrigerator. Finish a drawing or a hat, and put it somewhere as a testament that you are achieving things. The world is not a grimdark place. Wherever you live in the world, there are probably some adorable, small brown birds, being cute and fun. Flowers will start to bloom, oblivious to the political situation in any one of a number of countries. Daffodils are beautiful, regardless of the political climate. After all, if you take bleak darkness and cover it in glitter, what do you have but a beautiful starry night sky? 
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no-144444 · 2 days ago
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abu dhabi- o.piastri
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summary: your first season as an f1 driver doesn't start the best, and you quickly realise McLaren doesn't like women very much. On top of that, your race engineer is as smug as the rest of them, and you have to deal with him all the time.
pairing: race engineer! oscar piastri x f1driver! fem! reader
warnings: lots of misogyny, lando is an asshole in this, illusions to ed behaviour, reader is not in a good head space, all of mclaren is super sexist, mentions of crashes and injuries.
a/n: thank you all very much for your patience, this series means a lot to me and I've had a lot of personal stuff going on, so I felt bad for leaving you guys hanging for a bit. Thank you all so much for reading this series and I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I love writing it!
part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven
୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅
Abu Dhabi. World Drivers Champion. World Constructors Champions.
Holy shit. 
All those years of hard work, of giving up being a child, of giving up having friends or family. You’d done it. You were a winner. 
You jumped out of the car and ran straight to Oscar, jumping in his arms. He caught you (of course) and cheered with you. 
“You fucking did it!” he smiled, pulling your helmet off. “You did it!” 
Every emotion flooded through you, but one in particular stood out; gratefulness. 
You were grateful for Oscar, for how he treated you, for who he was. He was there for you through everything, he helped you whenever he could, and while yes, you had a rough start, in the end you couldn’t imagine F1 without Oscar in it. 
“Thank you, Osc, for everything,” you smiled, hugging him close. 
“Anytime. Whenever. Always,” he nodded. 
୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅
He was drunk as fuck, but he was still watching you as you chatted with various team members. 
“You’re fucked, aren’t you?” Lando chuckled, joining his side. 
Oscar rolled his eyes. “I’m drunk, yes.”
“No. You’re fucked for her,” Lando pointed twoards you. Perfect, unreachable, you. 
“Yes,” he nodded, frowning. “I’m fucked for her.”
“It’s pretty clear.”
“I know it is,” Oscar scoffed. “Thanks for Baku, by the way.”
Lando sighed. “Look, I’ve said a lot of shit this season that I didn’t mean, and I’m sorry I was a dick to the two of you. It wasn’t right and I do feel bad about it. So, I’m sorry.”
“Thank you, but that doesn’t solve the fact that she’s being this mysterious weirdo and acting really into me and then really not,” Oscar whined. 
“She’s a very broken person-”
“You think?” Oscar rolled his eyes. “You’re not exactly giving me much hope right now.”
Lando laughed at his drunk state. “Just talk to her,” he offered. “She listens to you no matter what.”
Oscar stared at him, then nodded. “Good idea!” he announced (a little too loud as it drew the attention of a few people around the two of them), and looked at you. But you weren’t there. Oscar frowned again. 
“You’ll find her before the end of the night, I’m sure you will,” Lando clapped a hand on his shoulder and passed him a bottle of water to sober him up. “Good luck.”
୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅
Oscar had decided to go find you, he wanted to talk. On the way there, he’d acquired about three more drinks and pissed off a small group of other McLaren employees by spilling one of his three drinks and apologised profusely (albeit rather mumbly), and that’s when you came in with a hand on his shoulder and a gentle smile that brushed it all over. 
“Are you alright?” you asked him, taking him to a corner to look him over. 
“Y/n?” he questioned, his vision blurry. “Is that you?”
You chuckled. “Yeah, it’s me buddy, you alright?” 
He nodded, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you in for a hug. “I’m so proud of you.”
“I’m proud of you too, Osc, come on, we get you to bed?” you offered, pulling one of his arms over your shoulder and helping him walk. 
“Bed sounds good,” he nodded, allowing you to walk him to his room. 
Drunk Oscar was what you assumed three year olds acted like. He pressed every button in the lift, ding-dong ditched people in the hallway, and stripped (almost) naked the second he got in the door of his room. After a few minutes of being in his room, he decided it was a good time to puke his guts out in the toilet, and you, being the good samaritan you are, decided to stay with him. 
“Feeling any better?” you asked, putting a cold cloth on his head as he lay in bed. You sat beside him, holding his hand. 
He shook his head, his eyes closed and a grimace on his lips. “Shit.” 
You chuckled lightly. “You’ll feel better in the morning.”
He opened his eyes and stared into yours, his hand resting over your hand. And time (as it always did when he was looking at you like that) stopped. The world melted away, and it didn’t matter that it was 2 in the morning, or that he’d just vomited, or that all of this was a lot more confusing than either of you had anticipated. You two just got to be with each other, and that was enough for the both of you. 
“Why don’t you love me?” he asked, his voice small and raw. He spoke to you with all the care in the world, but you could see he was hurting. You were hurting him. 
Fuck. Why couldn’t any of this be easy? Why couldn’t you just… talk to him? Confess to him? Be normal? The boy you love was sitting there in front of you telling you he loved you and you just… froze for a moment. You took a deep breath.  “Osc, of course I love you,” you whispered. “But you shouldn’t love me. I wouldn’t be any good for you.”
“I don’t care-”
“You’d end up hating me-”
“I could never hate you,” he shook his head, reaching a hand up to cup your cheek. “I could never hate you.”
And you believed him. That was the scary part. You believed him when he told you he loved you. You believed him when he said he cares. You believed him when he said you look beautiful. You believed him when he said he wouldn’t hate you. “You should,” you whispered, tears forming in your eyes. 
“I couldn’t,” he whispered back, a soft smile on his face. He wiped away a tear that fell. “I don’t want you to be scared of how you feel.”
“I don’t want to hurt you,” your voice broke. “I’m not an easy person to love.”
“I disagree,” he chuckled, wiping every tear away. “I find it’s as easy as breathing.” 
And you couldn’t take it anymore. You curled up beside him and sobbed. You didn’t know how long you’d done it for, but you woke up beside him, the steady rise and fall of his chest against your head giving you something to ground yourself to. You remembered every moment of last night, every word he said, and everything you said. 
You just hoped he wouldn’t. 
୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅
When Oscar woke up, he knew there was something he had asked you last night, but he couldn’t remember what. After his conversation with Lando, there was nothing else he really remembered, apart from the fact that you had brought him up to his room, and he pieced together that he’d probably asked you to stay (being the pathetic hopeless romantic he is), and that’s why you were in his bed. 
A few seconds after waking up, the hangover hit, and fuck it was bad. His entire body ached. 
“I’m never drinking again,” he groaned, his voice hoarse. 
You chuckled beside him. “Remember anything?” 
He sighed, turning to meet your eyes. “Nope.”
As much as that destroyed you, you knew it was for the better. Oscar was better off without you, that, you knew for sure. But, you also couldn't put aside the confession he'd made last night. “I find it’s as easy as breathing.” It played in your head over and over again, like a mantra that made every negative thought in your head silent for a few seconds. Oscar was good at that, making you question yourself. Either way, you were glad he hadn't remembered. It was for the better, right?
There was a split second where he could’ve sworn he saw a flash of disappointment in your eyes, but it was gone as quickly as it was there, replaced with a smile. “Well, let’s go back to Monaco.”
He groaned just thinking about facing the day, but the fact that he woke up next to you meant it was better than any day he’d ever had. 
He definitely needed to know what he asked you last night. And you definitely needed him to not find out. 
୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅୨ৎ⋅
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honeyedmiller · 2 days ago
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A Burning Desire part eight
firefighter!joel miller x f!reader
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series masterlist
rating: 18+, minors do not interact.
warnings: fluff, vulnerability, shimmer mention!, brief mentions of past verbal abuse, angst, mentions of pregnancy (reader’s sister), extremely inaccurate descriptions of how insurance / payout works (just go with it, it’s fiction lol), smut (fingering, m!oral receiving, masturbation, phone sex), no use of y/n. if there’s anything i missed, please lmk.
word count: 10.6k
synopsis: joel and tommy are sent on a dangerous work trip.
a/n: fuck. thanks for being so patient with me. there’s hints of foreshadowing in this unrevised (sry) monster of a chapter, and the next chapter will be angsty. i hope you enjoy tho. thx for sticking around and reading my silly little story <3
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Getting back into the swing of things after the holidays has always deemed itself to be arduous. You’re lucky you work from home, but you’d taken on the responsibility of getting Sarah out of the house in time to drive her to school. It’s not that you mind at all, you just hate getting up out of a warm bed, especially when you have Joel as your own personal furnace now. 
Having two weeks off of said responsibility was nice because you and Sarah got to sleep in and you made her breakfast with hot cocoa nearly every morning before you had to clock in for work. She’d spend most of her break over at her friend’s house or reading a book either in the living room or her room, anyway. 
She has since gone back to school, and having the house to yourself again is still a bit unnerving, which is why it’s nice on days like this where Joel has off from work and can spend some time with you. Even if you’re stuck in your home office on days like today, he checks in on you once in a while to make sure you’re doing okay. 
Today has been particularly hard, only because the client you’re working with is demanding as hell and your boss is jumping down your throat to make sure you appease said client. Your face is buried in your hands as you sit and decompress for a minute, and that’s when Joel decides to check in on you. It’s like the man has spidey senses for when you’re going through it or something. 
“Hey baby, I brought you some—” He stops short when he sees the state you’re currently in. 
“You okay, honeybee?” His voice is gentle and honestly concerned, and your heart melts yet again at how sweet he is. 
“Work’s just stressing me out a bit,” you answer truthfully. You look up at him from your seat as he stands beside you, setting down a small bowl of fruit for you to snack on next to you on the desk. You softly smile at the fruit before looking back up at him. “Thank you, handsome.” 
“Ain’t a thing, baby. ‘M sorry you’re so stressed. Anythin’ I can do to help?” 
He steps behind you now and his large, warm hands land on your shoulders before he begins to massage them. You groan softly and loll your head to the side, rolling your lips into your mouth before shaking your head. 
“Nah. Luckily this is my last day dealing with this client, so it’ll only be for a few more hours. Thank you though, baby. It means a lot.”
You reach up and grab one of his hands, giving it a thoughtful squeeze before you let go to reply to an email your boss sent you. 
“Well what if I told you that I have a date planned for us this weekend?” 
You look up at him with furrowed brows. “Where?” You ask, excitement taking over your body. 
“Well, I know everythin’s been kinda hectic with my accident and me healing, your sister’s news, you movin’ in, the holidays, and Tommy and Maria’s engagement. We’ve been so busy n’ we’ve barely had any time to ourselves outside of the house in a while, so I wanna take you somewhere kinda peaceful.” 
He doesn’t give away too much, but you’re already on board.  
“You’ve got me intrigued. Can’t wait to see what you have up that sleeve of yours.” 
“Good, ‘cus I also bought you a couple ‘a things to go along with this weekend’s date.” 
“Oh?” You give him an incredulous look, but his boyish shit-eating grin is all you need to see to not ask any further questions, no matter how piqued your curiosity is. 
You smile up at him and shake your head, focusing back on your work. You sit in silence for a couple of minutes as he continues to massage your shoulders while you type away. 
“I’m gonna go on a run. I’ll be back in time to fix you up some lunch.” He kisses the top of your head before you look up at him with a small smile. 
“If I wasn’t glued to this desk right now I’d join you,” you laugh. “Be careful out there, baby.” 
“Always am. Maybe I can exercise you in another way later on,” he says, smirking down at you with mischief written all over his face. 
“You’re insatiable, Mr. Miller.” But the idea doesn’t sound half bad. 
He holds his hands up defensively. “Can’t blame a guy for wantin’ to love his lady right, can you?” 
You roll your eyes with a laugh and tug him down gently by his shirt before giving him a lengthy kiss. You release him and pat his abdomen twice. “Have fun on your run, cowboy.” 
-
After a long week, the weekend finally rolled around and Joel still wouldn’t tell you exactly what you two were going to do on your date. 
He just kept reassuring you that you’d love it, and you’ve slowly learned to just go with the flow and not ask anymore questions. 
He insisted you wear a blindfold this time, and made you get into his truck as he took the next few minutes to put whatever it was in the back seat before you both took off. 
You ride passenger for about thirty minutes or so with soft tunes of George Strait playing in the background before you hear gravel crunch under the tires of the truck as Joel turns left. 
“You aren’t exploring a new kink right now, are you?” You snort, turning your head in his general direction. “Blindfolding me like this just to take me in the middle of nowhere and have deliciously rough sex with me and make me fall in love with you even more, hm? Is this your diabolical plan?” You can’t help but wiggle your eyebrows at your own absolute absurdness. 
He chuckles deeply and you can practically feel him rolling his eyes at you as the brakes squeak slightly and the truck comes to a slow stop. It’s silent for a moment before you hear him move, and you feel the heat of his body right next to you. 
“Not today, sweet girl.” The deep raspiness in his voice sends a shiver down your spine. He huffs a laugh before kissing your cheek and taking off your blindfold. 
You blink a few times as your eyes adjust to the light, the sun shining brilliantly on land—lots of it. Something shimmers in the distance, and you realize it’s a creek that runs along a trail that looks like it’s meant for horseback riding. 
Then it clicks. You look at him with pure excitement in your eyes. 
“Are we going horseback riding?” 
He can’t help but grin at the giddiness in your tone. “Yeah baby, we are. Figured we’d eat first, though. Packed us some of our favorites and thought we could make a picnic of it as we sit by the creek.” 
Your heart absolutely flutters and grows ten times fonder for the man in front of you, if that’s even possible. You try to hold back your tears of gratitude, but one can’t help it and slips down your cheek. 
Joel wipes the tear with his thumb as he leans in to kiss your forehead. 
You grab his face gently in your hands before admiring his beautiful brown irises. 
“Oh, Joel,” you choke out, leaning in for a loving kiss. You rest your forehead against his as you sniffle once. “This is so thoughtful. This place is beautiful. Thank you.” 
“‘Course, my honeybee. Life has been too hectic lately n’ I wanted to treat my woman to somethin’ a little more… relaxing.” 
“What a lucky lady she is,” you giggle, smiling against his lips and giving them one more peck before you pull away. He opens his door and hops out of the truck, jogging over to your side to open your door before offering his hand to you. You take his hand and he helps you out, feet hitting the ground with a thud. 
You both gather the stuff for the picnic before making your way over to the creek that was no more than a hundred yards away. 
You set up the blanket on some soft grass as Joel puts the cooler down beside you both, and you sit down across from each other. You admire the atmosphere, with the sun beaming enough to warm you up some and the song of birds chirping in the trees. The sound of water flowing up the creek adds to the blissful ambience, and you sigh in content before noticing a house off in the distance. 
“Does someone live over here?” You ask, stretching your legs in front of you as you lean back on your palms to hold yourself upright. 
“This is actually my uncle’s land. Tommy n’ I grew up playin’ in these fields and this creek. We’d used to help him on the ranch to earn some extra allowance durin’ the summertime when we got older.” 
You imagine a little Joel and Tommy running around in these fields whose grass sways with the gentle breeze—and then you’re picturing kids of your own. Kids that you’d eventually have with Joel. Hearing their little squeals of joy, chasing them around in the soft grass, making new memories for years to come. You imagine Sarah would be the best big sister, despite any age difference they might have. 
“This place is beautiful, Joel. Does your uncle still own the land?” You ask, eyes shifting back to him. 
He nods. “He does, but he’s had to hire help since he’s a bit too old to take care of the place himself. I know for a while he’d been thinkin’ about sellin’ it, but he says there’s just too many fond memories tied to this place.” 
“That’s understandable. I can just imagine a young you and Tommy causing a ruckus around here,” you laugh, and he nudges your leg with his own. 
“Don’t mean our mama and pops didn’t talk some sense into us,” he chuckles, face tilting toward the bright blue sky. 
“Looks like it did you two some good. They’d be proud of you both, I’m sure. Wish I could’ve met them.” You give him a sympathetic smile, and he gives you a small sad one in return. 
“They would’ve absolutely loved you, baby. I can just hear my mama now: ‘Bout damn time you wanna get settled down with someone nice,’” he sighs and reaches for you, and you maneuver yourself onto his lap. You rest your head against his chest as he wraps his arms around you, giving you a small squeeze while kissing your hair. 
“She sounds like a lovely woman,” you say, nuzzling into his strong chest. 
“She was. I’m very lucky to have had parents that gave my brother n’ I a great example of what true love really looks like, whether it was through their relationship with each other or the love they showered us with. I knew even back then that what Sarah’s mom n’ I had wasn’t true love. It was staying together out of convenience because she’d gotten pregnant. I really tried with her, but nothing made her happy. She became verbally abusive toward me after a while, too. It got even worse after Sarah was born. She didn’t want to be a mother. After everythin’ her and I went through, even after she left us, I’m grateful for her bringin’ my daughter into this world. I love my baby girl more than life itself,” he sighs, taking a breath for a minute as he recounts his past. 
“Raisin’ Sarah as a single dad truly was full of trials and tribulations. I did have help from my family, which I’ll always be grateful for, but I was doin’ it all on my own for the most part. Havin’ the odd schedule I have now and makin’ it work around Sarah’s took a long while, but we finally got it down. Nobody had ever wanted to stick around after a night together because they thought that me havin’ a kid was too… complicated. I can understand it from their perspective, but truthfully, nobody ever gave me a chance to get to show them the real me. They just saw me as someone they can check off their bucket list and mess around with because of my job and the uniform I wear. And then you come along, unexpected, knockin’ me off my feet in the best way possible and showin’ me that love is still in the cards for me. You’re it for me, baby. I don’t think I can ever express my gratitude to you for showin’ me what it feels like to be seen and—god—to be loved the way you love me.” 
You soak his words in before wrapping your arms around his torso. You press a kiss to his stubbled jaw, letting him silently know that you’re here for him. 
“Thank you for opening up to me,” you murmur, tracing your fingers over his back in a soothing motion. “I can’t even imagine what that was like. I’m so sorry you had to go through all of that.” Your voice holds a gratefulness and sadness that isn’t missed, and he shakes his head. 
“Thank you for allowin’ me to be my true self, emotions and all,” he says, and you hug him tighter. You recall him telling you that his ex would tell him ‘real men don’t cry’, and your heart hurts for him even more. How could somebody be so cruel to such a loving man? 
He sighs and lays down, sun glistening against his beautiful golden skin. You admire his handsome features and softly smile as you bring a hand down to run through his curls. 
He pops one eye open before giving your wrist a tug, and you land on him with an oof. 
He chuckles and wraps his arms around you, trailing his fingers down so he can put both of his hands in the back pockets of your Wranglers. 
“I love you so much, baby.” His voice is thick and low, causing butterflies to erupt in your stomach. 
“I love you too.” 
The easiness of which the phrase rolls off your tongue is a beautiful thing, you think. You’ve come so far with opening up your heart to Joel, and he, you. You look down at him and savor the way his eyes look like a smooth whiskey in the sunlight, the way the skin around them crinkles when he smiles at you. 
You lean down and finally seal your lips to his, and you feel him fully relax as he moves his hands from your back pockets up to the middle of your back and back down again. You stay like this for a few minutes, enjoying the feeling of each other as the soft breeze causes the grass to rustle and the sound of water and lips smacking is a harmony lost in the wind. 
It isn’t until you hear his stomach rumble that you pull apart from him with a laugh, maneuvering yourself off of him to sit up. 
“Sounds like someone’s hungry,” you tease, reaching for the cooler. 
“I’m hungry alright,” he says, leaning over to capture your lips in yet another searing kiss. 
“I’m serious Joel,” you laugh against his lips. “You gotta eat.” 
He sighs and puts his hands up in defeat. “Fine.”
You nudge him with a grin before opening the cooler, revealing sandwiches, grapes, chips, waters, two soda cans, and… chocolate covered strawberries. You raise an eyebrow at him as he smiles sheepishly at you. 
“Chocolate covered strawberries?” You parrot your thoughts, moving to sit criss-crossed. 
“I know how much you like them so… I made ‘em for you special.” 
If your heart could burst anymore, this man would probably be the end of you with his unconditional love. You don’t know how much more you can possibly handle, even though you know you’re going to spend the rest of your life with him. It’s the little things like this that he goes out of his way to do for you that has never been done by anyone, so getting used to his kind gestures has been a rewarding challenge. 
“Thank you, honey. This is so kind of you.” You lean over to kiss his cheek before handing his food to him, and you both dive into your meals as you enjoy the serenity surrounding you. Then a pressing thought pops into your head. It takes you a few minutes to conjure up the courage to ask Joel the burning question on your mind, but you eventually find the words. 
“Are you serious about wanting kids with me, Joel?” Your voice is soft as you look around again, then meet his gaze. 
He swallows his food before nodding. “I’m one hundred percent serious.” 
Your heart flutters. “You don’t think the age gap between Sarah and her future siblings would be weird?” 
Joel thinks about it for a moment. “No, I wouldn’t say weird. Might just take some time t’get used to. Ever since she was a toddler she’d been beggin’ me to give her a sibling, but I obviously couldn’t do that considerin’ I didn’t have anyone to… procreate with,” he chuckles at the last part. You laugh with him and nod, swallowing the last bite of your sandwich. 
“I couldn’t imagine growing up without my siblings. Even when there were times we all fought, we all still laughed about it later on and got over it quickly. Bless my mom and dad’s hearts, ‘cus I know we were all a handful.” 
You smile as you reminisce growing up with your brothers and sister. You’d want your future kids to have that type of sibling bond, too. 
“I know what you mean. I remember when my mama and pops told me they were havin’ another baby. I was over the moon about it, ‘cus it meant I’d have someone by my side for life. Tommy might be a grade A pain in my ass, but I’m grateful that he and I grew up so close together and stayed that way throughout adulthood.” 
“I think Sarah would be a great big sister,” you say, and Joel sports a proud smile that makes your heart melt. 
“I think so too, baby.” 
“I never thought I’d be talking about having kids with a partner ever again, you know. I’m happy we’re on the same page about this. I think it’s important to discuss this even before we eventually decide to take the next step in our relationship.” 
He nods in agreement as he opens the tupperware that has the chocolate covered strawberries, taking one out before bringing his other hand to coax your mouth open. He offers you a bite of the strawberry, and he finishes off the rest of it after you take your bite. 
“I’m happy too, baby. ‘S good that we can clarify things now. I’ve never been with someone who can communicate with me so easily, so I thank you for that. I really am just a lucky bastard who got hit on at a coffee shop,” he chuckles, shooting you a wink as you laugh. 
“Thanks for taking a chance on me, Miller. Glad I didn’t disappoint.” And with that, you lean in for one last searing kiss before you both finish off the strawberries and dust yourselves off as you take the cooler and blanket back to his truck. 
You’re about to head for the stables in the distance, but Joel stops you. 
“Wait, I have somethin’ for you,” he says, reaching further into his back seat. He pops his Stetson on and you bite your lip before shooting him a look. 
“Haven’t we already established that you in your cowboy hat drives me absolutely wild?” You cross your arms over your chest as you continue to stare at him incredulously.
“Yeah, baby,” he laughs. “But now you get to match me.” 
He pulls out another hat and spins around, plopping it onto your head. Your eyes also drift down as he hands you a shoebox. 
“Joel, oh my– is this–?” You’re at a loss for words, and he sports a smirk on his face. 
“Open the box, sweet girl.” 
You do as you’re told, carefully opening the box to reveal a beautiful pair of brown leather cowgirl boots with white floral stitching across the front. 
“Joel, these are beautiful. Thank you so much.” 
“Ain’t a thing, baby. Try ‘em on.” 
You slip off your sneakers and try on the boots, which fit perfectly. Joel adjusts the hat on your head before giving you his million dollar smile. 
“Beautiful.”
“You think so, cowboy?” 
“Absolutely. And y’know,” he pauses as he slides his hands comfortably on your hips, pulling you flush against his body. “Every cowboy needs his cowgirl.” 
He gives you a twirl before dipping you, leaning down to kiss you before standing you upright. 
You’re all smiles and giggles as you walk hand-in-hand to the stables, where one of the ranch workers greets you both with a smile. 
“Hey Joel, you’ll be ridin’ Stella and Shimmer today,” the man says. Joel gives him a curt nod as the corner of his mouth twitches up into a half smile. 
“Thank you, Drew.” 
Drew tips his hat to you both before walking off to tend to the other animals near the stables, and you turn toward Shimmer as you begin to gently pet her. 
“Hi beautiful girl,” you coo, stroking her snout. She nudges you gently and you grin before glancing at Joel. 
“She likes you,” he says. 
You beam at him before he chuckles and comes behind you, boosting you by your waist as you situate yourself on the saddle on Shimmer’s back. You continue to stroke her mane as you place your feet in the stirrups, grabbing a firm hold of the reins. 
Joel follows suit as he mounts himself onto Stella, and clicks his teeth twice to lead the way out of the stables. Shimmer follows suit, and soon enough, you’re both riding side-by-side on the trail by the creek. 
“Thank you for all of this,” you gesture your hand around you both before grabbing back onto the reins. “It means a lot to me. I had a lot of fun.” 
“Yeah?” He asks, his voice hopeful. 
“Yeah. It’s been absolutely perfect.” 
You take a moment to admire him and how the sun’s golden rays shine on him as it slowly starts to set, casting a beautiful orange and pink glow in lieu of bright blue. He gazes at you with such a softness you’ve never witnessed before, and you think it’s a thing beyond love. Devotion, compassion, protection—all in a single look. 
A look that has taken care of your heart when it was tender and aching, a look that has pumped it full of love again. It’s a look that flips your world around in the best way possible.
It’s a look that could make you cry. It’s funny, because you never used to be so in-tune with your emotions before. Before Joel, a majority of your life with and after Christian had you feeling so numb and devoid of any feelings or emotions. It was draining, and you didn’t think you’d ever be able to feel so lively ever again. 
Well, never say never. 
There are no words to describe the love and gratefulness you feel for this man riding beside you, but you know you’re going to spend the rest of your life proving it to him, even if it’s wordlessly done so. 
-
A few months down the line, the ranch ends up becoming a small escape for you and Joel. When you both had free time, you’d slip away and drive to the open fields to enjoy the calmness of the water under the starry nights, laid up in the bed of his truck on top of a bunch of blankets. 
It’s the only house around for miles, so it’s super private and quiet. It’s like your own little secret with him as you’d lay there, talking about anything and everything—and sometimes leading to more. 
You’re in the middle of more, trying to muffle your moans with Joel’s mouth on yours as his fingers curl inside of you. You’re aching and needy, rocking your hips against his palm so your swollen clit rubs against his flesh. It’s intoxicating, the way his fingers move so perfectly inside of you. 
You gasp against his lips as a dark chuckle rumbles in his chest. 
“Thas’ it. Atta girl, jus’ like that,” he murmurs his praise as you rock your hips so willingly and meet every thrust of his fingers, so close to your release that your whines start to mesh with your panting. “You gonna be a good girl and cum for me?”
You fist his hair between your fingers and smash your lips to his in urgency, crying against him as a wave of toe-curling bliss surges through your veins.
”Oh, fuck!” 
You gush around his fingers and down his wrist, and he lowly hums as your body convulses a few more times, stomach drawing taut as you come down from your high. 
“Make such pretty messes, baby. So fuckin’ beautiful.” He kisses your forehead as he withdraws his fingers slowly, sweeping them over your sensitive clit to spread your arousal before bringing his fingers up to his mouth to suck them clean. You clench around nothing at the sight as your head falls back against the makeshift pillows, gaze bleary as you try and slow your breathing and heart rate by staring at the stars twinkling so brilliantly. 
Joel dips his head down to kiss you, and you tangle your fingers through his curls once more before dragging a hand down his neck, to his chest, and down to the waistband of his sweats. You palm him through the material, arousal blooming in your core once more as you feel how hard he is for you. Feel how much he wants you.
You stop your ministrations for a beat, separating yourself from his lips as you lick the palm of your hand, only to dip it into his sweats and boxers to wrap it around his length. You give him a small squeeze and he groans, eyes fluttering shut as his head tilts back. 
You huff a laugh and lean up to kiss at his thick, warm neck, licking a stripe from his earlobe down to his pulse point. You suck a little on the skin there, loving the way he twitches in your hand. He feels so heavy and warm, and all you want to do in this moment is take care of him the way he deserves—so you do just that. You slide your body down after giving him a kiss, and the dazzling look in his eye is all you need to keep this going. 
You settle your shoulders between his thighs, now face-to-face with his weeping cock. You hum before giving the silky flesh a few more tugs before leaning forward, licking the salty bead of pre cum from his slit. 
“Such a pretty cock,” you praise, rolling your lips into your mouth before you look up at him. He doesn’t say anything, but you can see the flush that has taken over his neck and face in the pale moonlight. His lips are parted and his breathing is a bit ragged, and he’s just waiting for you to pounce. 
Usually, you love to tease him just to see how worked up you can get him, but you’re too impatient and want to hear those delicious moans only reserved for you. 
You lick a long, wet stripe on the underside of his cock before sucking his balls into your mouth, pumping his length as you gently massage him with your tongue. 
“Oh, fuck me,” he groans, hand shooting out to cradle the back of your head. You hum appreciatively around him, pumping him at a steady pace now before moving your mouth up onto his shaft again. You swirl your tongue around his tip a few times before taking him all, feeling his head hit the back of your throat. Tears prick your eyes as you try to swallow around him and refrain from gagging. 
“Holy fuck, baby, you like doin’ this don’t you?” His voice is a deep, raspy mess, and you clench your thighs together at the sound. 
He pulls your mouth off of him, the tip of his cock coating your lips in saliva. 
“Answer me. You like this, huh?” 
Fuck. The possessiveness in his tone makes you want to roll your eyes into the back of your skull as you moan, but you opt for a nod as you rasp out a yes. 
“Look so pretty with my cock down your throat. Can fuckin’ see it when you take all of me.” 
You suck in a sharp breath before your dazed, fucked out mind conjures up the words before you even realize it. “Like this?” 
You lower your mouth back onto him, and he’s spewing a string of groans and curses together, and he eventually moans your name like a prayer on Sunday when you keep deepthroating him like this. You don’t let up, either. You know your throat is going to be absolutely fucking wrecked by the time you’re done, but it doesn’t matter. 
Not when you get to see him like this. 
He sucks in a breath through his teeth as you let up on his length and just focus your tongue and lips on his tip, making his hips buck up involuntarily. His fiery gaze meets yours and you can tell he’s nearly a goner. 
“So…fuckin’...sexy,” he grunts. You grin as you kiss his tip and flutter your eyelashes up at him, taking him in your mouth and down your throat one more time before slowly coming back up, tightening your lips around him. 
“Fuck, baby, ‘m gonna–” 
He doesn’t have time to finish his sentence before he’s coming undone, coating your tongue and throat with his cum. His body shudders as you slide your tongue up from his length. You swallow and wipe the saliva off of your chin with the back of your hand. 
“You really are somethin’ fierce, woman,” he praises. You’re too dazed to respond, so you offer him a grin and a kiss to his thigh. 
Joel tucks himself back into his boxers and pulls his sweats up, pulling your body up to his so you’re cuddled into his side. He pulls a blanket over both your bodies and kisses you, and you nuzzle your head onto his chest. His steady breathing and strong heartbeat is what does you in before you even know it. 
You wake up in a bit of confusion, amidst hearing a constant buzzing noise. You’re still in the back of the truck with Joel, who’s passed out beside you. His breathing is steady and he looks so at peace, so you try not to move around so much before you finally realize that Joel’s phone is ringing. 
You have to dig around a bit to find it before you lift it up and squint against the bright light, only to see he has three missed calls from Tommy. Your heart drops, because Tommy is a huge texter. He only ever calls if something’s really wrong. 
“Joel,” you rasp, throat sore from your earlier escapades. His brow furrows and he softly groans, and you softly tap his shoulder. “Baby, wake up. Tommy keeps calling you.” 
His eyes crack open and he sits up, grabbing the phone from you. He dials Tommy back and presses the phone to his ear, still clearly trying to wake his mind up. 
You can’t ignore the anxious thrum of your heart. You have no idea what it could be about, and Joel’s face reads worry clear as day. You wrap your arm around him and kiss his shoulder in reassurance. 
“Tommy, what’s going on?” Joel asks, and you can faintly hear Tommy’s voice on the other end of the line, but can’t make out the words. 
“Shit, okay. I’ll be back at the house in 30 minutes.” 
Joel hangs up the phone and scrubs his hands over his face before looking down at you. He gives you an apologetic smile before leaning down to kiss your forehead. 
“Sorry honeybee, we have to go back home. Our captain wants everyone at the fire station in an hour. Somethin’ important he needs to tell us all.” 
You furrow your brows and sit up, starting to fold the blankets and pack them away in the cab of the truck. You ride in silence for about fifteen minutes, your hand on Joel’s as his sits comfortably on your thigh. His thumb brushes back and forth in reassurance, but your mind is reeling with possibilities of what could be so important for all of them to know. 
“Do you have any idea what your captain might say?” 
Your voice is soft with a sleepy lull to it, and Joel looks at you for a couple of seconds with a small smile on his lips. 
“No idea, baby. It has to be somethin’ big ‘cus he only calls us in like this if it’s super urgent.” 
You nod in understanding, giving his hand a squeeze of reassurance. You arrive home fifteen minutes later, and Tommy greets you both at the front door. You give Tommy a hi/bye hug and Joel a kiss before they’re out the door and driving down the street. 
You decide to stay in the living room. Watch a movie or something, and wait for them to come back. You settle onto the leather couch, wrapping a blanket around you as you turn the TV on and keep it at a low volume. Exhaustion sweeps through your bones as you lay still. Your eyelids get heavy, and before you even realize it, you’re out cold once again. 
-
The front door unlocking stirs you from your sleep, and the familiar tread of boots is heard walking into the living room. 
“Baby, I’m back,” Joel says. 
You open your eyes and yawn, gaze landing on the clock. Eleven p.m. 
“Hey,” you say, voice timid. “How’d the meeting go? Is everything okay?” 
You sit up, allowing room for Joel to plop down next to you. He spreads his legs and leans his head back against the couch, pinching the bridge of his nose. 
“I have to leave. Well, Tommy and I have to go. There’s a huge fire that broke out in San Angelo earlier today and it’s spreading fast. They need all hands on deck.”
You take in the information and furrow your brows, pausing for a beat before speaking. “How long will you be gone for?” 
He moves his hand from the bridge of his nose and looks at you with a sad expression. 
“‘M not sure, sweet girl. Could be for a few days or a few weeks. It really just depends on the conditions of the fire and the surrounding areas.” 
You nod in understanding before grabbing his hand, once again squeezing it in reassurance. 
“When do you and Tommy leave?” 
“Tomorrow morning. Captain told us to rest up as much as possible before we head out. It doesn’t look pretty, and it’s a four hour drive for us.” 
“I think you should go wake Sarah up and tell her,” you say. He nods and kisses your head before he trudges up the stairs. You turn off the TV and follow suit, settling into your side of the bed after you wash up and change into your pajamas. 
Joel comes into the room a few minutes later, closing the door behind him. 
“How is she?” You ask, opening the covers for him. He strips down into just his boxers before climbing into bed with you.
He nods. “She’s okay. Sad that I have to leave, but I told her you’d take real good care of her.” 
You huff a laugh and nod in agreement. “That I will, Mr. Miller.” 
Then realization hits you—since Tommy is leaving, that means Maria will be alone. 
“Are you okay if I invite Maria to stay over here while you guys are gone? I know she can take care of herself, but I’d rather her not be alone for however long.” 
“‘Course, baby. ‘S your home, too.” 
And, it is, which is an aspect you’re still getting used to. 
He settles into you, nuzzling his face into your chest as he inhales deeply. He kisses the skin there once before wrapping his arms around you. You rest your head on top of his, running your fingers through his hair. He falls asleep in a matter of minutes, but you remain wide awake, plagued with the thought of him going out to do his very dangerous job.  
You sigh and scold yourself for even thinking about that, because even just the prospect of telling him to stay is so unbelievably selfish. You’d never actually tell him, of course, but you think it and the thought is all-consuming. 
You just worry, like any partner would, but you worry even more especially after the nasty accident he had. You know he’s been doing this for a long time, but you’ve learned that fires can be unpredictable and life doesn’t deal in absolutes. 
A couple of hours pass and Joel is still sound asleep, meanwhile you haven’t gotten a wink of rest. Your eyes roam to the bedside alarm clock—four fifty in the morning. You sigh softly and get up as carefully as possible, trying not to disturb Joel. 
Since you can’t go to sleep, you decide to use your energy to make Joel and Tommy some lunches and a few batches of your cookies that everyone at the firehouse loves so they have something to snack on while they’re on the road. 
You start with the cookies and make enough dough for at least three batches, trying to stay as quiet as possible. You hand mix everything and put the three baking sheets in the oven, setting a timer on your phone. While the cookies bake, you make both of their lunches and pack them away. 
You can’t stand still and need to keep your hands busy to distract yourself from your looming thoughts, so you go ahead and make a fresh pot of coffee, too. 
You pour yourself a cup and put a dash of creamer in it, taking a sip as you lean over the counter and sigh. You close your eyes and rub your temples in an attempt to ease your mind. 
You hear a door open upstairs and some shuffling down the steps soon after, and a sleepy Sarah emerges. 
She rubs her eyes as she gives you a small smile, making her way to the barstool that’s on the other side of the counter from you. 
“You’re up early,” you muse. 
“Couldn’t stay asleep,” she says, and she looks at the oven as she sees cookies baking. She raises an eyebrow. “I’m assuming you couldn’t sleep at all.” 
“You’ve got that right,” you huff a laugh, taking another sip of your coffee. 
“I don’t want him to go.” 
Her blunt confession takes you aback, but it gives you a bit of comfort knowing you and her are in the same boat. 
“I know, sweetheart.” You reach your hand out to cup hers, running your thumb back and forth over her knuckles. 
“I know he’s doing this for good. I just… I don't want to see him hurt again.”
You nod in understanding. “It’s a catch twenty-two.” 
She sighs, and you round the counter to bring her into a hug. 
“I know it’s not much of a distraction, but how about we go get a pedicure later on? Just to relax a little.” 
She nods against you before leaning back to meet your gaze. “I’d love that.” 
“Great. In the meantime, are you hungry? I can make you some waffles.” 
“Thank you, but I’m not super hungry right now…” she pauses, eyeing the oven. “I’d love one of your cookies, though.” 
You laugh and nod, your phone timer going off at the perfect moment. You take all three sheets out of the oven and set them down on racks, letting them cool down. You serve her one before starting to clean up, and that’s when you hear Joel’s heavy footsteps make their way downstairs. 
“Morning cowboy,” you tease, pouring his cup of coffee as he stares at you two in confusion. 
“Mornin’…you’re both up early.” He makes his way to Sarah and kisses her hair before moving to you, giving you a chaste kiss on the lips. You hand him his cup of coffee and he wraps his arm around you and gives you a gentle squeeze. 
“Thank you,” he murmurs, taking a sip. 
“What time do you and Uncle Tommy need to be at the station?” Sarah asks, biting into her cookie. 
Joel’s eyes glance at the clock on the stove. “Around nine.” 
It’s silent for a moment, and Joel looks back and forth between you both. 
“Y’all still haven’t told me why you’re both up so early.” He raises an eyebrow, looking to you for an answer. 
“Couldn’t sleep,” you shrug. 
“At all?” 
“No. I laid there for a couple of hours before I got up to make you and Tommy some lunch and a few batches of cookies for the crew while you’re on the road.” 
Joel’s eyebrows tug together. He sets his cup of coffee down, circling his arms around your waist. He holds his arm out, silently coaxing Sarah to join in. She hops down from the stool and hugs you both, and you nuzzle into them both. You all stand there for a good minute before Joel is giving you both a squeeze and kisses your heads. 
It’s like the sense of dread and anxiety hung in the air, and he clocked in almost immediately. 
Not much gets past him—you’ll give him that.
“I love you both very much. I’ll be alright,” he says. “I promise to check in every day when I can, okay?” 
His comforting embrace and reassuring words warm your heart. 
You all untangle yourselves from the embrace, and you give him a soft smile. 
“We love you too, Joel. We just worry for your safety.” 
“I know baby, I know. Believe me when I say there’s nothin’ I’d rather do than stay at home with you both, but this is an all hands on deck situation.” 
“We’d never ask you to stay, dad. We know this is part of your job and it’s important that you’re there,” Sarah says, pausing as a tremble overtakes her bottom lip. She wraps her arms around him, voice broken and soft when she speaks next. “Just be careful, okay?” 
You can see a flash of emotion in Joel’s eyes as he hugs her back, leaning his cheek on top of her head. 
“I will, babygirl. I swear to you.” 
-
You’re standing in a small group in the fire station, getting ready to send Joel and Tommy off with the rest of their crew. You’re having a conversation with them two, Maria and Sarah when one of their coworkers—Mark, you think—walks up to you, holding up the bag of cookies. 
“I just have to say thank you for these. They’re the firehouse favorite.” 
You grin and shrug. “Not a problem. Just a small thank you for everything you guys do.” 
He smiles at you and looks at Joel. “She’s a keeper, Miller.” 
Joel wraps his arm around your shoulder and kisses your temple. “I know. I’m a lucky, lucky man.” 
“Alright, it’s time to head out,” their Captain calls. 
You sigh and turn toward Joel. You offer him a small smile as your heart clenches with anxiety, but your expression never wavers. 
Sarah gives Joel a tight hug, expression still a bit sullen. You can tell she’s trying her best to hide it, but it slips through and it’s a look you recognize all too well. You give her shoulders a squeeze of reassurance 
He has that look in his eyes. The one where it’s filled with worry, with anxiousness. The same look that’s probably in yours, too.
You want to lighten the mood, so you tug him flush against your body by pulling the leather strap of his radio holster that sits across his chest. He laughs as his hands land on your waist, and you push your lips to his. 
You separate from him after a few seconds, smiling softly against his lips before you pull apart just enough to see those beautiful, worried brown eyes. 
“Be careful out there, cowboy. I love you.” 
He squeezes your hips. “I will, baby. I love you too.” 
He leans down to give you one more peck on the lips before he moves to say goodbye to Maria. You do the same to Tommy, wrapping your arms around him and giving him a soft little peck on the cheek. 
“Take care of each other, yeah? Life’s a lot more fun when you’re both here with us, unharmed.” You look between Joel and Tommy with a sternness they’ve never seen before. 
Tommy’s eyes crinkle as he smiles at you, his dimple showing up along with a flash of white teeth. 
“You got it, boss.”
He salutes you, and you sidle up beside Sarah and Maria as you wave them both goodbye. They climb into the same truck, and they’re on their way to San Angelo. 
-
Two weeks have passed, and Joel still isn’t home. He keeps his promise on checking in every day when he can, sometimes shorter conversations than others, but you’re grateful nonetheless. 
Today, your siblings all agreed that a lunch was much needed between you four so you could all catch up. It was the perfect distraction, and with Sarah at school and Maria at work, you agree immediately. It’s so odd being in an empty house when you’re not on the clock, and since you’d finished with your clients early, you had the rest of the day to yourself. 
You meet up with them at a local diner, slipping into the booth next to Emily. She has a small belly now, and you lean down to air kiss it before greeting her, Andy and Cole. 
“I’m so glad we got to do this,” Emily says, and you all nod in agreement. 
“I know. It’s been awhile since I’ve harassed you guys,” Andy jokes. You roll your eyes and throw your crumbled up straw wrapper at him. 
“So how goes it?” Cole asks, leaning back in the booth. The young waitress stops by your table to take your orders before collecting the menus, and Emily starts. 
“Things have been great, actually. Baby boy is healthy and Josh got promoted at work.” She runs a hand over her belly, and your eyes light up. 
“I’m so happy for you, Emi. How does Josh like the promotion?” 
“It’s great, really. He gets more time off now, especially to come with me to my appointments, and he got a pretty significant increase in his salary.” 
“That’s so good. I still can’t believe you’re having a kid. My nephew is gonna be a little stud with the coolest uncles,” Andy says. 
“What am I, chopped liver?” You laugh, rolling your eyes. 
“You’re only semi-cool. You’re with a cool guy, though, so I guess that raises your points.” 
“God, you men are so fucking weird with your logic sometimes.”
“Yeah yeah,” Andy waves your words away, before his expression gets a bit more serious. “How is he though? How’s Tommy?” 
“They’re okay. They’re exhausted, though. The fire had spread rapidly because of the winds, and they’re still in the process of containment, but I think it’s almost at one hundred percent.” 
“Fuck. I can’t even imagine. We had a pretty dry winter too, which probably didn’t help much,” Cole says. You shake your head and gnaw on your lip, deciding to change the subject for your own sanity. Emily senses it, because your sister knows you like the back of her hand, and she finds your hand folded in your lap and gives it a reassuring squeeze. You squeeze right back.
“So what’s been going on with you two? Anything new?” You look between your brothers, and the waitress drops off your food before they can say anything. 
Cole’s eyes avert to the basket of fries in front of him, and you raise an eyebrow as you watch him carefully. He finally opens his mouth to speak, but snaps it shut when Andy starts to talk. 
“Not much. Work is good. Can’t complain.” Andy shrugs his shoulders and takes a bite of his burger, and you nod before looking back to Cole. You nudge his foot under the table and his gaze snaps up to yours, and you give him an encouraging smile. 
“That’s good, Andy,” Emily says. 
“I, uh, I met someone,” Cole starts. Everyone’s eyes shift to him, and he sports a small smile. “It’s still pretty new, though, so that’s why I haven’t mentioned it before.” 
“Hell yeah, brother. Happy for you,” Andy claps Cole’s shoulder and he smiles. 
“Where did you meet?” You ask, popping a fry into your mouth. 
“Met her at the bar we went to a few months back. Finally bucked up and asked her on a date a couple of weeks ago, and it’s been going good ever since.” 
Although Cole seems to exude confidence, you know he’s more on the shy side when it comes to romance. You and him have always been the shy kids, while Andrew and Emily were outgoing and bubbly. When Emily first told you to put yourself out there with Joel, the shy shell of a woman you used to be went into fight or flight mode—but she ultimately ended up being right. 
You can hear it now: That’s what big sisters are for.
You’re grateful you and your siblings are all close in age. Although you’ve all fought over stupid, miniscule things that seemed like the whole world when you were younger, you all ended up being very close, which is something you’ll never take for granted. 
“That’s great, Cole. I hope we can meet her when you’re comfortable enough to bring her around our crazy family,” Emily laughs, and you all chime in and chuckle along. 
“I think Josh and Joel can attest to that,” you say. “I told him he could’ve run for the hills before Emi’s wedding, but that man stuck by my side and told me he wanted to meet all of you.” 
“Now that—” Cole swallows his bite of food, “—Is a real man.” 
“And look at how happy he’s made you. I love seeing you together, especially after everything you’ve been through,” Emily says. 
Andy’s face turns sour, frowning at the vague mention of your ex. “If I ever see him in person again I won’t hesitate to deck him in the face.” 
You didn’t have to question who he was. You already knew. “Get in line, Andy. Joel has first dibs.” 
The corner of his mouth lifts up in amusement before he reaches out to you, palm upward, making a ‘give me’ motion with his fingers.
“Give me my ticket.” 
You laugh and push his hand away, and lighter conversation ensues the rest of lunch. 
The waitress drops the check off at the table, and you mumble that you’ll Zelle whoever pays as the other three fight over the check. Your phone rings and you pull it out of your pocket to see who it is.
Your eyebrows furrow as you see your attorney’s name across the screen of your phone. You slide the answer button over and cover your other ear so you can hear him better. 
“Hello?” 
“Hey! Long time no talk. I have some good news,” he says. 
“Hey, yeah, how are you? What’s the news?” 
“I’m good, but even better now—apparently whoever hit you in your accident was some big wig’s kid, and the parents want to pay you out a big amount for your car and, as they said, ‘any emotional damage caused by this accident’.” 
“Oh fuck,” you say. You rub your forehead with your thumb and forefinger. “Sorry, sorry. Uh—how much?” 
In all honesty, you’d sort of forgotten about your accident because so much has happened in your life since that day. You smile fondly at the memory of Joel kissing you in the back of that ambulance, within only hours of knowing each other at that point. 
You had no idea that it would’ve led to this. A good life with an even greater man. 
“They sent out a check to your house, but I think it’s in the hundred thousands range.” 
Your eyes bug out of your head and your jaw drops. 
“I’m sorry, what?” 
Your siblings all look at you in confusion, but you still can’t wipe the look of shock off of your face. 
Your attorney laughs at your initial reaction, but you’re still in utter disbelief. 
You can’t even fathom that kind of money, but you’re sure your attorney is used to those kinds of numbers. 
“Yeah, so keep a lookout for a check in the mail,” he says. 
“Um, yeah, will do. Thanks for giving me a call.” 
“Of course. I’ll touch base with you if anything else comes up.”
You say goodbye and hang up, and you meet your siblings’ gazes. 
And, with a small smile, you pluck the bill from Andy’s hands. “Actually, lunch is on me today.”
-
You almost fall over when you open the envelope with your check in it. 
Half a million dollars. You don’t know who the hell this kid’s parents are, but writing a check for five hundred thousand is fucking insane. 
You stare at the numbers in disbelief as you sit at the edge of the bed, sun casting its brilliant golden glow across the paper in your hands. The paper that reads half a million fucking dollars. It’s like a jackpot lighting up in Vegas or something.
You don’t know how long you stare, but if you did any longer, your eyes would burn holes in the paper. You slide the check back in the envelope and put it in your underwear drawer underneath your sports bras, because you honestly just can’t believe that it’s real. 
And later that night, when Joel FaceTimes everyone to say hi and check in, you don’t say a word about it. 
It’s not that you want to keep it from him, but you have an idea of what you’d like to do with a portion of the money, and you’d rather keep that idea a surprise for the time being. 
You trudge upstairs once more after Maria and Sarah say goodnight to Joel and Tommy, but Joel tells you to stay on the phone. He watches you do your night routine before you slip into an old oversized Texas A&M sweatshirt of his, sliding into bed. 
“I miss my woman somethin’ awful,” his deep voice rings through the phone. You look at the screen and sigh, a small smile settling onto your lips. He looks so exhausted, and all you want is for him to be safe at home again. By your side in bed. 
“I miss you too, handsome. How’s it looking out there?” 
He groans as he settles onto a bed himself folding an arm to lay his hand behind his head. 
“‘S kickin’ our asses. Embers from the original fire sparked a new one. It’s smaller, but these winds ain’t helping a damn thing.” 
“Oh, honey, I’m so sorry to hear that,” you say, gnawing on your lip as your eyebrows furrow in worry. “I feel awful that I can’t do anything to help.” 
“There is one thing,” he says. You recognize the tone in his voice—want. 
“What’s on your mind, Mr. Miller?”  
“You wearin’ my old sweatshirt?” He asks. 
You purse your lips and nod, watching how his expression turns lustful and determined in the confines of his temporary bedroom. 
“Wearing it ‘cus it smells like you,” you confess. 
A groan rips from his throat and scrapes low in your belly, and your eyes flutter shut as you feel slick already beginning to pool from the heat between your legs. 
“Are we really gonna do this?” You huff a laugh, raising an eyebrow at him. 
“I was a touch-starved man before I met you, baby. Then you go n’ spoil me with your pretty hands that can’t seem to keep to themselves.” 
“You could always tell me to stop, you know,” you purr. There’s some shuffling on the other end, and you see his heavy lidded eyes gaze at you. 
“I’d be insane to do so, darlin’.” 
“Would you?” 
He moans softly, and you realize he’s probably rubbing himself up. God, you wish that was your hand. 
“Mhm. Love when your hands are all over me, especially wrapped around my dick.” 
You can’t help but giggle, and a ghost of a smile curls at the corner of his lips. 
“Love that sound, too,” he adds. 
“You know what I love?” Your voice is teetering on the edge of a seductive whisper. 
“Hm?” 
“I love when my big, strong hunk of a man makes me feel so loved and protected. Allows me to delve into my femininity. Uses his strong hands and thick fingers to make me see stars.” 
You realize you’re probably babbling at this point, but your words seem to do the job just fine. Joel’s eyebrows pinch together and that all-too familiar muscle in his jaw ticks wildly. 
“Turn the camera around, Joel. Show me.” 
He doesn’t hesitate to flip the camera around to face the impressive outline of his cock in the gray sweats he’s wearing. Your thighs clench together at the sight, imagining what it’d be like to grind on him until he came undone. Hear his moans and strings of curses as he reaches his peak. 
“Fuck, honey,” you whine. 
“This is what you do t’me, baby.”
His voice almost sounds pained, but you know it’s because he’s held in so much tension the past couple of weeks with no way to release it. You’d do anything to distract his mind from the exhaustion he feels and fires at hand, even if it’s for a brief few moments. 
You decide to be a little raunchy, because fuck, you’re already in this position, and you want to be a good distraction—again—even if it’s brief. 
You make a show of yourself sliding your fingers down the valley of your breasts and down your stomach, wasting no time to reach your desired destination. You swipe your middle and ring finger through your slick folds, coating them in your arousal before you bring your fingers up to show the camera—to show Joel—how much he turns you on. 
You separate your fingers, and a string of your slick connects between the two. 
“This is what you do to me.” 
Joel all but growls at the sight, slipping his hand into his sweatpants to grab his aching cock. You can just imagine how warm and heavy it feels in his big palm, and you sigh at the thought. 
“Fuck, baby. Be a good girl n’ touch yourself for me.”
He’s breathless, but the sound sends shockwaves through your body as more slick gushes eagerly from your aching, needy center. 
You slip your two fingers in your mouth, humming around them as you taste the tangy-sweet flavor of yourself. 
“Shit,” he says, a moan scraping from his throat. You grin like the Cheshire Cat before slipping your fingers down again, alternating between rubbing your clit slowly and dipping your fingertips into your cunt. 
You flip the camera around to show him, and it sounds like he nearly whines from the sight. You suck in a breath as you stop teasing yourself, slipping the two fingers fully into yourself. You pump them languidly, and hearing Joel’s ragged breath and gasps on the other end of the line has you writhing. 
“You don’t know how bad I wish these were your fingers and not mine,” you gasp out, grinding your hips up into your palm. 
“Oh don’t worry baby,” he pants, “‘M gonna give you everythin’ you need n’ more when I come back.” 
“That a promise?” 
“Mmm—mhm.” 
He matches the stroke of his cock with the pump of your fingers then. 
“Can’t wait to be buried in that pretty little pussy. Take me so well. Fuckin’ made for me, baby. So fuckin’ tight n’ warm. ‘S like a dream,” he babbles, and you have to bite down on the collar of the sweatshirt to keep a moan ripping from your throat.
”Need your mouth all over me too, Joel,” you cry, “Love it when you let me cum by your tongue.” 
“Yeah? Next time I’ll have you usin’ my face as a fuckin’ seat. Hold you down so you have no choice but to cum in my mouth over n’ over again.” 
“Oh, god.” 
“You like that, huh? The thought of fuckin’ my face to get you off?” 
The words die on your tongue as you try to speak, but the pleasure that was once a low burn in your belly is now its own full-fledged sun. It’s so white hot and you’re on the edge, gripping the phone in your hand for dear life. 
“Answer me,” he growls. 
“Fuck, yes! Yes yes yes,” you whisper-cry, and you’re unraveling before him on camera. You soak your hand and undoubtedly the sheets beneath you, but that’s a tomorrow problem. Your body convulses a few times and you moan as you see the white spurts of cum land on his stomach. He moans your name like a prayer on Sunday, and it makes you shiver with seemingly untamable arousal. 
He breathes heavily before grabbing a tissue to clean himself up, tucking himself back into his sweats before he flips the camera back around to his face. 
His cheeks and neck are flushed, and you can see the sweat on his forehead as he tries to steady out his breathing. You stretch and roll over on your side, laying your head on his pillow to inhale his scent. 
“I love you, my honeybee.”
You smile at the nickname and yawn, stretching your limbs one more time before curling in on yourself. 
“I love you too, cowboy. I can’t wait ‘til you’re next to me in bed again.” 
“I can’t wait either, darlin’. I hope this is all over with soon n’ I can love on you the way you deserve.” 
You grin sleepily at his words, post-coital drowsiness wrapping around your body like a weighted blanket. 
“Stay safe out there.” 
“I will. I promise.” 
And you’re fast asleep soon after you hang up. You dream blissfully of life with Joel in the fields by the ranch, of your future with him, of the memories you’ve yet to create. 
You dream of Joel happy and safe, not an ounce of the beautiful man troubled. 
But this is real life. This isn’t a fantasy where you can wish good things for people and it just magically happens at the snap of a finger, a rub of a lamp. 
His resolve was slowly crumbling. The weight of the world was sitting steady on his shoulders, breaking him down piece by piece. 
Each broken fragment of him, scattered and fragile, lay in your hands—
and this time, it was up to you to put him back together.
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vettelsvee · 17 hours ago
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letting oscar take your virginity to celebrate his win
(if this makes you uncomfortable please to deny or only write fluffy before/after!) love ur work sm
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V CARDS GOODBYES | Oscar Piastri
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Oscar Piastri x Girlfriend!Reader
SUMMARY: Oscar arrives home after winning his first ever Formula 1 race, so you think it’s the perfect time for you to celebrate and, also, to say goodbye to your v card ↳ REQUESTED BY ANON: Hope you like it anon! And sorry it's taken me almost a year I'm a mess 😭
WORD COUNT: 3958
WARNINGS: Smut (virginity loss, female receiving oral sex, fingering, p in v, protected sex, little bit of praising kink), curse words
VEE'S NOTES: Came to the conclusion after the latests Oscar fics I’ve posted that he's the most popular driver on my Tumblr page, so this is for all my Osc people out there! I'm always ashamed of posting smut (but still want to keep writing it) so I hope this is good enough for you to enjoy! Remember that your comments and reblogs are truly appreciated! Thanks for reading <3 (Also, thoughts on the new layout?) ↳ MAKE YOUR REQUESTS | TALK TO ME! | FORMULA 1 MASTERLIST
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© VETTELSVEE (2025). please, do not steal, copy or translate my works. thanks for reading!
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The door of the apartment you shared in Monaco opened, and before Oscar could step inside, he heard excited screams that made it clear someone was more than happy about his arrival.  
Not only did your cat start rubbing against his leg while purring, but also you, his girlfriend, were hopping towards him, barefoot and wrapped in one of his McLaren hoodies, which turned out to be even bigger on you than you had expected when you decided it would be a great idea to steal it from your boyfriend.  
"You did it, Osc!” you squealed as you threw your arms around his neck. "Osc, oh my God, you won a race! Do you know what that means?"  
Oscar felt his cheeks turn red. Of course, he knew exactly what winning a Grand Prix meant, especially during his second season in Formula 1. However, all he did was shrug, as if his achievement wasn’t that important.  
"Yeah," was all he could say.  
"I’m so, so proud of you," you said in a trembling voice, standing on your tiptoes to cup his face in your hands.  
"I couldn’t have done it without you, even though you were here," Oscar replied sincerely, a hint of regret in his tone. If there was one thing he regretted, it was that you hadn’t been there with him throughout the whole process of stepping onto the podium.  
"I know you would have liked me to be there, and I would’ve loved that too," you replied, making a sad but funny face. "But it’s okay! I screamed at the TV a lot, so I guess I helped in some way… And I’m sure you’ll win more races and I’ll be there to see them all, so it’s not the end of the world!"
Oscar chuckled and pulled you close until there was no space between you. He allowed himself a few moments to hold onto you, gently running his fingers through your hair while you clung tightly to his shirt, pressing your face into his chest as if he might disappear at any second.  
"Hey… I have something for you."
Even though you whispered it, Oscar heard you perfectly. You bit your lip,. a telltale sign of nervousness he knew well, as you pulled away from him. Then, you quickly headed towards the living room, with the Australian following you, and grabbed a small book he had never seen before.  
Carefully, as if it were fragile, you handed it to your boyfriend.  
"Open it… I hope you like it!"
Oscar did as you asked. Gently, he opened what he soon realized was a photo album. It wasn’t just a collection of pictures of you from the past two years since you started dating. It was beautifully decorated. There were messages, and even reflections from your perspective about each memory you had built together.  
"I know it’s not a big deal, but since I was so bored with studying, I have to admit I procrastinated a bit and felt like doing some crafts, so… well, this was the result," you said hesitantly, as if you were confessing a crime, though a small smile crept onto your lips. "Maybe you were expecting something else, I don’t know, but I hope you like it. You could even take it with you whenever you have to travel, so you remember me and also add something else if you feel in the mood," you added softly.  
Oscar felt a lump in his throat, unsure of what to say. Although he was used to you being thoughtful, and he always tried to reciprocate, you somehow kept outdoing yourself.  
"Y/N, this is…" he trailed off, struggling to find the right words. More accurately, he didn’t know how to express them. "It’s incredible. Thank you so much."
You smiled and gave him a gentle kiss on the lips, which, as you both expected, quickly turned into something more desperate, fueled by your hunger for each other.  
Oscar’s hands found your waist beneath the hoodie, his fingers tracing invisible lines along your skin, moving up and down, even toying with the clasp of your bra. The only thing you could do was keep kissing him, tugging at his hair lightly and pressing yourself against his thigh, seeking friction to ease the growing ache within you.  
Then, you suddenly pulled away, more abruptly than Oscar had expected. Your pupils were completely dilated, your lips swollen, and your hair a complete mess.  
"Oscar…" 
"Y/N…"
"I want to do it."
Your voice was barely a whisper. Oscar’s eyes widened, surprised because, even though he perfectly understood what you meant, hearing you say it out loud was an entirely different feeling.  
"Bebe…" 
"I really, really want to do it, Osc," you repeated, more as a confirmation to yourself than to him. "Yesterday, you lost your v-card in Formula 1 with your victory, so… I was thinking maybe I could lose mine too."  
Oscar had known from the very beginning of your relationship that you had never been physically involved with anyone beyond a couple of kisses and teasing. At first, you had been insecure about telling him, worried about feeling ashamed, but Oscar had always made sure you felt safe and comfortable, promising you would only take steps forward when you were truly ready.  
Today, your words made clear that you finally felt like that moment arrived, and that filled Oscar with happiness not because you were about to have sex, but because it meant you were finally comfortable enough with yourself to take that step.  
"Are you… sure?" he asked, even though he already knew the answer. "You know we don’t have to rush anything… I don’t want you to feel like we have to do this just because, you know…" 
"I know, Osc, and I promise I wouldn’t be bringing this up if I weren’t sure," you reassured him, looking into his eyes as you ran your fingers over his hands. "I love you, and most importantly, I trust you. I’ve thought about this for a long time, and well… yeah."
"It’s just… I don’t want to mess anything up, Y/N. This is really important, and it should be perfect,” he confessed with a nervous chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck.  
You smiled, cupping his face and bringing him closer for a kiss.  
"It doesn’t have to be perfect as long as it’s with you, Osc.”
"Okay, but… if you change your mind at any point, you tell me," Oscar insisted. You laughed, rolling your eyes.  
"I promise, really."
Your lips met again, but this time much slower. Oscar took his time kissing you carefully, wanting to do everything right. He cradled your cheek with one hand to deepen the kiss, while the other wrapped around your back, guiding you gently toward the bedroom you shared.  
Once inside, he forced himself to stop and take a deep breath to avoid panicking, even though there was no reason to.  
You stood in front of him, looking at him with a mix of shyness and adoration that reminded him of your early days, when you just used to go out for coffee or to the movies back in high school.  
Oscar couldn’t help but look at you with an equally shy, yet utterly endearing, expression.  
"Tell me if you want me to stop, alright?"
"I will, yeah."  
You didn’t need to say anything else since kissing spoke for you. You took your time, enough for Oscar to make sure you felt completely comfortable, enough for you to overthink just a little more before deciding if you really wanted to continue…  
*"I love you, Oscar…" you murmured between kisses. You tugged at his shirt, helping him pull it off, running your hands over his bare chest as if you were seeing him for the first time.  
"I love you too, Y/N…" 
With nerves and hands shakier than he would have liked, almost as if he were the inexperienced one, he took hold of the hem of your hoodie and slowly lifted it over your head, leaving you in just your underwear.  
Oscar was surprised to see you in black lace lingerie instead of the usual shorts you wore around the house. He was about to say something, but you didn’t give him the chance. You closed the distance between you, pressing your foreheads together before kissing him once again.  
Neither knew how long you were like this, but you both agreed that it had been long enough to discover that you needed more of each other.
Oscar ended up forcing himself to pull away from you and take a breath. A smile curved between his lips, which caused you, somewhat nervously, to giggle at the situation and hug him around the waist, pulling him closer to you while trying not to shove him away.
“Really, we don't have to do it if you don't want to, Y/N,” the McLaren driver insisted once again.
“I've been looking forward to doing this for a long time, and I've been mentally preparing for it for a while,” she told him, trying not to sound uneasy. “I trust you, Osc, and there's nothing for you to worry about.”
“So...?”
“I want you to make me yours, Oscar. Today, tomorrow or whenever and wherever you want,” you whispered in his ear as sensually as you could.
“Y/N…”
“Oscar: I just want you to fuck me.”
You felt your boyfriend tense up after those words that had caught even you off guard. Instinctively, you brought your hand to the noticeable bulge under Oscar's pants, but when you tried to reach for the button to unbutton them, he pushed your hands away lovingly.
“No, honey, none of that for now. Today is your day, so let me do the work and just enjoy yourself.”
Oscar, without another word, took you by the chin and kissed you again for the umpteenth time that day. Now, your lips moved at a slower speed. You guessed it was because you noticed how one of Oscar's hands began to massage one of your breasts, giving special attention to the nipple. With the other, he lightly brushed your pussy, making you gasp when he decided to play with your clit.
“Do you like it, babe?” he asked in a tone of voice that showed too much excitement.
His fingers now delved a little deeper into your intimacy, those enveloping movements becoming a little faster.
“Yes, Osc...” you barely managed to answer.
That answer was enough for the Australian to stop immediately. You didn't even look him in the face. Oscar pulled away from you, leaving a quick kiss on your lips and starting a trail of kisses all over your body, stopping once he reached your lower stomach area.
“Y/N…”
His hands stood delicately on your thighs, which he was now kissing, closer and closer to your pussy. Your hair stood on end. Your breath was completely held, unable to breathe in case that put an end to it all, as if that would be enough for Oscar to finish whatever he was doing with you. 
“If anything we do tonight makes you uncomfortable and you want to stop, just tell me please,” the Australian declared. “And, before your little head starts thinking nonsense: no, I'm not going to get mad at you because you don't want to have sex, okay? If you don't want to…”
“Oscar, look at me,” you cut him off, and the boy immediately listened to you: “it's you, and I'm not going to feel uncomfortable with you and with anything you do to me.”
“Do you promise me, love?”
“I swear.”
Oscar nodded, grabbing your thighs again and dragging you to the edge of the bed so that his face was in front of your pussy, perfectly aligned with your entrance.
Without warning, he slid his tongue, flat, all over it with a slowness that was completely unbearable and that seemed that, rather than pleasing you, he wanted to kill you little by little. His movements were frantic; constant changes of speed, from faster to slower, and vice versa, that made his nose rub against your clit while his tongue seemed to do wonders with that dance.
When Oscar's tongue began to explore inside you, and his index finger, the one he used to show on camera every time he got a first position just like Sebastian Vettel did in his golden age, started a tortuous tour of your labia majora, you curled up shyly but instinctively. Your hands ended up tangled in his hair, forcing him closer to you at the same time your hips did the same.
“I think you're liking it, aren't you my little girl?” Piastri said, ending his oral contact with you and replacing it with his finger. His gaze was fixed on her, and you thought about why he hadn't done this to you before.
“Don't stop, Osc. For the sake of God, don't even think about stopping...” you gasped, becoming increasingly unable to articulate a word.
He didn't have to say anything else. After those words, Oscar slipped a second finger inside you. You let out a small gasp of surprise and he, without taking his eyes off you, laughed, your cheeks turning red almost instantly. Despite this, he kissed your thighs as he continued the back and forth with his index finger, adding his heart almost soon after while increasing even more the speed.
You felt that everything was going too fast, and the waves of pleasure that were flooding you were making you lose, more and more, the notion of time. You didn't know at what point, but when he decided to add his tongue back into the equation, without leaving the movements of his fingers inside you going straight to that spot that gave you the most pleasure, a strange sensation gripped the lower part of your stomach.
It was getting harder and harder for you to hold back your orgasm. You felt how your eyes were closing little by little, and your leg, too, to which Oscar put a little pressure on them to prevent them from closing.
“Come for me, love,” Oscar let you know. “Come on, Y/N, you've got it babe. Come on…”
And so you did.
Your back curved in such a way that your body, completely sweaty, could hardly keep on writhing as it was doing. You were moaning like you had never moaned before, and your boyfriend seemed to notice. A smirk of satisfaction and success began to break from his lips as he licked at your fluids, his mouth moving slowly now, over-stimulating your clit and making you incessantly.
The Australian rose and carefully positioned himself on top of you.
“I love you, Y/N, you don't know how much,” he said between kisses, making you taste yourself for the first time, but hopefully not the last one. “You are the most beautiful girl in the world... And the best girl in the world. Don't ever doubt it.”
“Oscar, don't…”
“Yes you are, Y/N, and I will not allow you to speak so negatively about yourself.”
After those last words, the driver pulled away from you slightly, trying yo give you some time to recover. Then, you looked at him taking what seemed to be a condom from the bedside table, which he carefully put on and immediately positioned at your entrance. 
You swallowed, while Oscar tried not to think about whether he was really going too fast.
·I don't want to sound weird, but... please, if you want me to stop, just tell me,” Oscar spoke as best he could, trying not to succumb to the nerves he felt about taking this important step with you. “I want you to be pretty sure about this since… Well, since there’s not going back…”
You said nothing. Instead, you gave him a slight nod with your head, still looking at him, which was enough for Oscar to enter you carefully, but without a previous warning.
He decided to stand for a while so you could get used to his length. You felt a little pain. You held back a scream, bit your lips and closed your eyes to do your best to make that feeling go away as soon as possible.
“Y/N…”
“Go on, Oscar. It's all right…”
The boy nodded, and finished entering you with the same care. Little by little, his movements gained speed. You arched your back, moaning incessantly as she started feeling more comfortable with the depth of penetration, and Oscar hitting her in a spot that made her feel a pleasure that you feel in a way you didn’t know how to describe, but that felt good enough to make you never want that sex session to end.
“Does it feel good, honey? Are you enjoying my... cock... for the first time?” Oscar moaned, biting her neck. “Look at you… so desperate for me to keep fucking you…”
“Fuck, Oscar... this is a fantasy,” you gasped. “And you talking so... like… like this... God... Don't stop, please…”
“Never for you, sweetheart.”
Your moans became one, a melody that your neighbors were probably listening to but you didnt give a fuck. Your gazes could hardly be averted, and your words, getting dirtier and dirtier as much as your were embarrassed at first, were sounding louder and louder, as were your pleas.
“Oscar!” you shrieked as you felt Oscar's fingers press against you nervous bundle.”
“Love...” he moaned through his teeth. ”Don't stop moaning my name, please. You don't know how you're making me feel right now.
·And of course I'm going to make you feel so much better when we do this again,” you replied, choking with pleasure. As best you could, you sat up a little and wrapped you arms around you boyfriend's neck. “I want to do it again, Osc,” you made it clear. “I want us to do this every time we get the chance....”
You kept moaning his name, giving him promises you knew he would never break. He kept reassuring you and how good you were doing, speeding up his movements as he couldn’t stop playing with your clit, all of that while he kept telling you that you were his.
You couldn't contain it anymore for the second time that day.
“Fuck, Osc,” he stammered. “I think I'm gonna…”
“Let yourself go, honey,” the brown-haired said. “You can do it, love. Cum for me.”
Your orgasm came before you could say anything else. Oscar came within seconds of you, and as soon as he did he ended, he gave you a short kiss on the lips as he carefully pulled out of heyour and collapsed beside you. 
Oscar's gaze remained fixed on the ceiling. You rested your head on his shoulder, trying to regain your composure with increasingly slower breaths. 
“You ok babe?” Oscar murmured after a few minutes.
“Yes,” you whispered, nodding your head with a smile peeking out. “Better than ever, actually.”
It was then that it dawned on Oscar. Quickly, he sat up a little and saw what was under where you were still positioned. His heart began to race, and a pressure settled in his chest as he realized the light blue bed sheets were stained slightly with blood as was his condom, still on him and which he hadn't paid attention to because he just wanted to be with you cuddling after he'd made you lose your virginity.
“Hey, listen, love…” he started to say in a calm, but concerned tone.
You followed his gaze, and couldn't help but blush and die of embarrassment inside.
“Oh...” you spoke quietly, instinctively covering yourself with the sheets. “This... is normal. Well, I guess so…”
“Does it hurt? Are you hurt?”
You shook your head, denying it, though the look on your face seemed to say otherwise.
“Well… It's just a little... just a little sore. But it's fine, really. It happens when you have sex for the first time with someone.”
Oscar studied your face, and he knew you wanted to stop this conversation. You wanted to let it go and pretend everything was fine so you wouldn't give him any sign that you hadn't liked it, even though your moans and pleas seemed to say otherwise.
“Still, you shouldn't let it go.”
The Australian approached you and gave you a shy kiss on the forehead. Then he got out of bed, still naked.
·Where are you going?” you asked in a voice mixed with curiosity and nervousness.
“I'm going to get a towel with hot water to clean you up.”
You opened your mouth to protest, but he was already heading towards the bathroom while taking off his condom. As you heard the faucet turn on, and your boyfriend getting everything ready, you couldn't help but feel bad because, maybe, Oscar deserved better, and your behavior, what was happening to you now, was not what he deserved.
You forced yourself to stop overthinking because if there’s one thing you knew for sure is that Oscar loved you, more than sometimes you were conscious of.
Your boyfriend came back a few minutes later, and found you sitting on the bed, curled up on yourself and clinging to the sheets while still covering with them, as if you were afraid.
“You don't have to…”
“I know,” Oscar cut you off, offering you a small smile, “but I want to. So, please, just let me take care of you.”
Your eyes softened at his proposal, and you forced yourself to calm down as Oscar, with his gaze and his hands coyly on your thighs, asked your permission to spread your legs. You nodded, and he carefully ran the wet towel and hot water over your pussy, giving it little touches because he didn't want to risk it stinging or hurting any more because he really didn't know exactly how the female body worked after losing your virginity.
When he finished, he kissed her knee and sat down next to her again, also covering himself with the sheets so he could hug her and, more than anything else, try to reassure her and make her feel as good as possible.
“There, that's it, all settled. Now, let's stay here and rest.”
“Was it good?”
Oscar let out a small laugh from his mouth at your sudden question as he leaned over to you and snuggled into your shoulder. 
”You've been amazing, love,” he replied, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you closer to him. Now you were both lying on your bed, looking at each other. “Are you okay now that… Did I hurt you? I need you to be honest with me... I should have asked you if you liked the pace I decided to take because, well, I’m not going to lie to you, I think I could have gone a little slower...”
You shook your head and didn't give him a chance to keep talking. Instead, you grabbed his face and pressed your lips to his.
“You don't have to worry about anything, Osc. It was far from perfect. So, from now on, I hope you win more races because from today on, winning sex has become a tradition that I hope we keep for a long time.”
Oscar laughed, knowing you were completely serious.
“We can make a tradition of this and anything else you want, love,” he buried his face in yours, and began to tickle your waist gently. “We can even have several rounds if you want, so… thoughts on that? Should we keep ready for a second round today?”
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lila-kriegerin · 15 hours ago
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OMG, OP!
I was just about to suggest "Now & Then "
but I saw it in your tags.
I'm so sorry this may look like an unhinged rant no one asked for, but someone has to tell people younger than me what I know, so I spent 2 hours crafting a reply/follow-up/addendum to you post, OP. Please forgive any formatting errors. I tried to keep things simple and engaging but a few things may look a little bit odd depending on what sort of device you're viewing it on. I couldn't take the risk of making all the text too small
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQLVzTtt2Ws
The biggest problem trying to find similar films is that they often involve at least two of the girls having some kind of relationship to boys causing drama (I'm looking at you, "Sisterhood Of The Travelling Pants "... and others) whereas a film like "Dead Poets Society " is definitely in that pseudo-homoerotic and explicitly homoerotic range of storytelling.
Why do you think "Little Women" was popular for so long? It was the 1oth century literary equivalent with the requisite brush with death and loss so common to an era before even antibiotics existed... and loss and grief still happen today.
It's true that so few are like "Newsies " and "West Side Story ", but DON'T sleep on hits like "Annie" &
🥁 drumroll, please 🥁
Want to guess what was the first obviously gay song featured in a film from Hollywood (after the Hayes Code)?
The First Gay Anthem: Calamity Jane's 'Secret Love'
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It's not "West Side Story " because it's a western frontier musical, and they skirted the lines as hard as they could to have a nice Christian young woman fancying a "tomboy": Calamity Jane (who by historical record seems to have favoured women and men).
Though based on American Western folklore, this premise clearly imitated the successful 1950 film version of Irving Berlin's Broadway musical Annie Get Your Gun, about Wild West sharpshooter Annie Oakley.
But instead of a make-over, Calamity Jane gives its tough-gal heroine a powerfully symbolic pistol; her masculine aggression plays with sexual identity through gestures enlarged to the point of farce. And then it goes deeper--into emotional confusion that grows from Jane taking on supposed male habits. Doris Day brings comic overstatement to Jane's complex repression of her own instincts. Like many a closet case, she exhibits a self-defeating willingness to fit into a male-dominated culture. Her tough mannerisms are also designed to protect her hidden, vulnerable emotions.
You have to dig.
Dig deep, and be willing to watch a film with a different spoken language and culture, but there are some parallels.
Consider the Britney Spears film, which I believe is called "Crossroad(s)" in English. [Sorry, I don't have time to look up the title.]
Now— what if there were a film that's something a bit like a lesbian equivalent?
Touch
A Chinese movie produced/sponsored by the sapphic dating app Rela. It follows three girls on a road trip. Chinese language with English subtitles.
I've never, EVER seen any website draw direct comparisons to other films that way, such as:
If you loved "She's The Man" but want it more sapphic (though ultimately thwarted by the producer), you can't miss "Bend It Like Beckham"!
The photo which was posted by OP DOES contain valid points!! (No one is going to treat you "like a man/boy" unless they truly think that's what you are, and society DOES socialise people differently, so: how would a group of teenage girls or very young adult women ever have experiences identical to those in a film like "Dead Poet's Society"?)
Nevertheless, there are some similar films that are comparable:
"Superbad" — "Booksmart".
I decided to hyperfocus trying to think up some equivalents to "Dead Poet's Society".
Here's a quick comparison I spent far too much time on:
If you’re looking for a Dead Poets Society equivalent with mostly female characters, a few films capture that same blend of deep emotional intimacy, artistic passion, and repressed desire. Here are the best contenders:
1. Mädchen in Uniform (1931 & 1958)
This is the OG queer boarding school drama. Set in a strict Prussian girls' school, it follows a young student, Manuela, who falls in love with her teacher, Fräulein von Bernburg. The film is explicitly homoerotic in a way that Dead Poets Society is only suggestive of—there’s longing glances, whispered affections, and a stifling environment that tries to crush individuality and desire. Like Neil, Manuela faces tragic consequences for daring to express herself.
Cracks (2009) — If Dead Poets Society were darker and more explicitly about queer desire, it would be Cracks. This film follows a group of girls at a remote British boarding school under the spell of their charismatic teacher, Miss G (Eva Green, in all her seductive, unhinged glory). When a new student arrives, power struggles and hidden obsessions unravel. It has all the repression, poetry, and tragic queerness you could want.
Heavenly Creatures (1994) — Peter Jackson (yes, Lord of the Rings Peter Jackson) directed this feverishly intense drama about two schoolgirls in 1950s New Zealand—Pauline and Juliet—whose bond becomes so consuming that it leads to murder. Like Dead Poets Society, it’s about breaking free from repression, but it takes a much darker turn. The homoerotic tension between the girls is undeniable, and the fantasy world they create as an escape mirrors the way the DPS boys use poetry to carve out their own space in a suffocating environment.
Picnic at Hanging Rock (1975) — This one’s all about atmosphere—a haunting, dreamlike film about a group of girls at an Australian boarding school who mysteriously vanish during a picnic. While there’s no overt romance, the film is full of lingering touches, dreamy stares, and a pervading sense of longing and repression. The rigid Victorian setting and the contrast between the natural world and societal constraints make it feel spiritually connected to DPS.
The Falling (2014) — Starring Florence Pugh and Maisie Williams, this film is weird and hypnotic. It’s set in an all-girls school in the 1960s and follows a mysterious fainting epidemic that spreads through the students. It has the same themes of teenage rebellion, deep female friendships that tip into obsession, and an oppressive institution trying to crush individual expression.
Céline and Julie Go Boating (1974) — This is a more whimsical, surreal take on female friendship and creativity. It follows two women who fall into a bizarre, looping story in a haunted house, constantly re-experiencing and altering the narrative. It has a Dead Poets Society vibe in the sense that it’s about escaping rigid reality through art and imagination, but with a queer-coded, magical twist.
If you want the closest equivalent to "Dead Poets Society"...
..."Mädchen in Uniform" or "Cracks" are your best bets, and Cracks more than Mädchen in Uniform
because the latter is so old fashioned that to further scandalise viewers they paired a teacher with a student.
If you want something more poetic and atmospheric, "Picnic at Hanging Rock" or "The Falling" will scratch that itch.
If all of that is too gay for you (gofuckyourself, tee-hee)
You really, REALLY should try
"Mona Lisa Smile".
(...and if it's not too gay for you, then go watch CRACKS right now!)
"Mona Lisa Smile" [hereafter referred to as MLS] is often called the "Dead Poets Society" [hereafter, DPS] for women, and yeah, it certainly hits a lot of the same beats—
an outsider teacher inspiring students to challenge societal norms,
a prestigious school that values obedience over individuality, and
a group of young people grappling with expectations that threaten to suffocate them.
Where DPS is about breaking free through poetry and self-expression, MLS is about that sort of thing tosome degree, but more about feminism, gender roles, and the fight for intellectual freedom in a world that wants women to be just wives and mothers.
Similarities to Dead Poets Society
The Inspirational Teacher as a Catalyst for Change
In DPS, John Keating (Robin Williams) shakes up Welton Academy’s rigid, tradition-obsessed environment with poetry and passion.
In MLS, Katherine Watson (Julia Roberts) does the same at Wellesley College, using art history to challenge her students’ pre-ordained roles as perfect housewives.
Both teachers are NOT merely instructing— they’re awakening their students, making them see the world differently, and often doing so in ways that put them at odds with their school’s administration.
The Oppressive Institution and Its Ideals
Welton Academy is a suffocating prep school that values discipline over creativity, much like Wellesley College in the 1950s. They outwardly promote academic excellence but ultimately groom women to become ideal wives. (T_T)
Both films show how these institutions uphold deeply ingrained traditions that resist change, even when it's clearly needed.
Both films show some of the human cost of trying, and giving up.
A Group of Students at a Crossroads
Just like Todd, Neil, and the rest of the DPS boys who struggle between expectation and their own desires, the young women in MLS— Joan, Betty, Giselle, and Connie—each navigate their own battles between societal pressure and personal ambition.
Joan (Julia Stiles) mirrors Todd.
Betty (Kirsten Dunst) is like a mix of Cameron and Richard from DPS.
Giselle (Maggie Gyllenhaal) is the Charlie of the group.
The Tragedy of Repression
DPS’s tragedy is clear: someone's dreams are crushed & there is a heartbreaking su*c*de [all the trigger warnings apply]. MLS doesn’t have a singular moment that tragic, but its heartbreak is quieter—seeing some brilliant young women choose societal expectations over their own ambitions because it feels like the only option... that is definitely going to haunt some people more than it may haunt white cis-hetero male viewers.
In both films, someone (one you probably like most of all, in both films) will have something horrible happen to them by their own choice, and that is very haunting.
Additionally, I dont think it's too big a spoiler to say oth films end with the teacher leaving— but to say why would spoil the endings of the films.
The last scenes mirror each other emotionally: in DPS & MLS, a quiet, bittersweet goodbye with both endings suggesting that while the teacher is gone, the ideas they planted will live on.
Key Differences
The Central Conflict
DPS is about breaking free from repression through art and poetry. It’s about passion, self-expression, and the fight for creative freedom.
MLS is about that too, though with more of a (*cough*white*cough*cough*) feminist focus on gender roles, feminism, and intellectual independence to have intellectual and self growth as an individual— and it asks whether women can truly be free when they’re still expected to conform to outdated expectations.
Homoerotic "Sub"text
[be honest: if you miss it in either film you're in denial or unobservent and that is your own journey you need to take]
DPS is filled with homoerotic tension, especially between Todd and Neil. The intimacy between the boys—the longing glances, the whispered poetry, the emotional weight of their friendships—feels deeply charged.
If you DEMAND that level of queerness, MLS ain't it.
MLS has some queer subtext, particularly with [one character], who is coded as more fluid in her sexuality, but the film doesn’t lean into that as much as DPS does because it's focused more on the pseudo-historical narrative from the book upon which it was based.
Don't forget that DPS came out to cinemas...
THEN "The Craft" did,
THEN "Cruel Intentions" did,
THEN MLS.
DPS was intentionally pushing boundaries of censors for queer story-telling when the USA was still afraid for gay people to peck each other with a little kiss on the lips on television before 10 PM.
DPS ends in a tragedy that reinforces the cost of defying the system— [spoilers redacted], and the boys are [narratively] left in a state which leaves the viewers feeling a bittersweet limbo.
MLS is perhaps a bit more hopeful; and although the school seemingly remains unchanged, things in that world have definitely shifted for the characters.
Their worlds aren't fully transformed though for MLS, it’s beginning to open up, but MLS leaves viewers with their own bittersweet limbo like DPS[-lite] with a sliver of a dash of hope.
Final Verdict:
"Mona Lisa Smile" is "Dead Poets Society" through a differing feminist lens.
It swaps poetry for art,
an all-boys school for an all-girls college, and
queer-coded male friendships for female students fighting for their intellectual freedom.
It has the same spirit—
a teacher who inspires students to think for themselves, an oppressive institution trying to maintain order, and young people wrestling with societal expectations.
However, where DPS is a tale of tragic repression, MLS leans toward quiet rebellion— not a fiery "O Captain, My Captain" moment, but a slow, steady push toward change.
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just saw this on pinterest and it hit me like a truck
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usedtobecooler · 14 hours ago
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the sinclairs' new neighbour arrives out of the blue on a random friday night in may and subsequently becomes the object of eddie munson's desires.
tw: explicit sexual content, 18+ minors dni. virgin!eddie, oral male receiving, eddie's pov. pathetic amounts of pining. no use of y/n.
you've been around after every hellfire meeting for a month now, waiting with legs crossed and swinging from a fold-out table as you sit patiently for them to wrap it up, and fuck if you're not the most distracting thing eddie munson has ever laid eyes on.
you join in on the end-of-game conversations every week, a genuine little interest in the lilt of your voice as you ask questions and join in with the banter, which usually consisted of ribbing mike wheeler for being a little shit.
and, eddie's not dumb, okay? he knows you're only here because you're picking up the sinclair siblings every week, taking a bit of the load off steve harrington, who's been designated chauffeur for a year now, much to his own dismay.
but, sometimes, he thinks you maybe like being here and spending late friday evenings in their presence. and it's a nice little delusion for eddie to live in until he's home and safely tucked under his sheets, thinking of your cute laugh and your flirty smile when he slides a hand under his sleep shorts.
he's only a man. a pervert of a man, absolutely. but he'll feed into his delusions and feed into his daydreams, because it's not hurting anybody but himself in the confines of his room.
things are shadowy and hazy this particular friday, and eddie sure as shit is not on his game. he's stuttering and fumbling over his words, which wheeler is using to his advantage like the dickhead he is, mocking eddie with every fuck up with that stupid fucking face he makes.
eddie calls it a day earlier than usual because his head just isn't in the game damnit, and henderson claps him on the back on his way out, giving him this sincere smile which eddie kind of hates because dustin usually takes every opportunity to add himself into their shithead-ery.
oh god, he was worse than he thought. he needs to hang his hat up and give his job over to zombie boy byers immediately.
eddie doesn't get out of his head quick enough to realise that harrington arrived and left with all of the kids in tow, the sinclairs included.
so when you arrive at the door a half hour later, a confused look on your face, eddie's face fucking falls.
"damn, did harrington want his old job back that badly he kidnapped my kids?" you laugh quietly, all sincerity and jokes as you look around the empty room, eyes landing on eddie with a sparkle.
"it's my fault, i let everybody go early and i-" eddie groans, putting his hands on his hips then dropping them to his sides, "i didn't think. sorry, sweetheart."
sweetheart. why'd he fucking say that? someone needs to get the shotgun and put him down like old yeller.
eddie makes himself busy by packing away all his stuff, pointedly not looking in your direction because he's an idiot piece of shit, and who knows what other mess will come out of his mouth if he keeps letting himself look at you.
"you seem stressed, eddie," you observe quietly, a statement. you cross your arms behind your back, fingertips linking together, "is there anything i can do to help?"
eddie lets out this little self-deprecating laugh, a mirthless smile on his features, "unless you stop showing up here, no, there's nothing you can do."
a hurt look flashes across your face momentarily before it disappears again, masked over with a confused furrow of your brows, "oh. i'm sorry, have i done something wrong?"
eddie's fucking this up. he's a fucking idiot, who apparently can't talk to any girl who isn't ronnie or little erica sinclair.
"just, y'know, consuming my brain so much that i can't focus on anything else lately, so." eddie admits, deflated as he slumps into his chair and rolls his neck until he's looking up at the ceiling. his throat clicks audibly, dry and scratchy.
"oh." you say again, a relieved sigh escaping you as you kick a leg out to bash his shin lightly with the toe of your boot, "why didn't you say something? that's- that's okay. lucas kind of figured, he told me your moon eyes were annoying him."
eddie's kicking them all out. hellfire will be no more. he's sick of these damn kids.
he covers his face with his hands, rubbing against his two day stubble with calloused fingertips. a useless groan escaping him, "sorry, i wasn't trying to be obvious. girls don't. hmm."
eddie stops himself with a grunt, trying to narrowly escape the word vomit that threatens to spill out. he's nervously jiggling his leg, the chains on his jeans clattering together obnoxiously loud in the otherwise quiet room.
he feels your presence enter his orbit, the soft press of your hand on his knee stopping the motion of his jerky leg.
"don't be so nervous," you scold playfully, voice light like you're trying to hide a smile, "i'm not anybody to be nervous around. i like that you noticed me, that i'm somebody you're interested in."
eddie's hands fall away from his face at that, and he blinks blearily, head lolling until he catches sight of you crouched down in front of him, staring up with these gorgeous eyes that eddie just wants to get lost in.
"really?" he asks dumbly, brain short-circuiting at the sight of you knelt down like this in front of him, his stupid mind wandering into filthy territory.
"really." you nod, smiling up at him with this thousand-watt thing that he's sure could power the whole of hawkins, "i'm interested, too. in case i wasn't being obvious enough by hanging around here willingly every week."
you weren't obvious at all. not at all. or maybe you were and eddie's just a fucking moron.
"can i help relieve some of that stress now?" you ask, head tilted to the side in question, "i'm only down here anyway."
eddie's brain melts out of his ears, he's pretty sure. his tombstone is sure to say here lies eddie munson, killed by the insinuation of a blowjob.
"oh, you don't have to- you really don't have to, ha, your hands are on me, fuck-"
the conversation kind of fades out after that, and you're all action dropping from your deep squat to thud your knees against the floor softly.
and you're so pretty on your knees for him, eyelashes fluttering across the apples of your cheeks that are flushed and warm. eddie practically melts into his chair as you paw at his jeans, fluid motions and featherlight touches like you've done this before, and god he doesn't want to think about that right now, that you've done this for other guys before him. not when you're laid out below him and nudging in between his spread legs with pursed lips, spitting over the flushed head of his dick to dampen it further.
"you should- you should know i've never done this bef- fuck, fuck," eddie stutters over his words, fingers clawing into the arms of the chair when you begin mouthing hot and wet over the leaking slit that continues weeping pathetically with every lave of your tongue.
he tried, okay? he tried to tell you, but he's a weak man and - and you're fucking looking at him with these pretty, knowing eyes like you had a clue from the beginning, and fuck was it really that obvious?
he clenches his eyes shut, trying to will away the images of a neon sign over his head that scream eddie munson, adult virgin.
you start off slow and savouring, lapping at him with these kitten licks and mouthing down the bulging vein on the underside. eddie thinks he's delirious, because he's surely imagining the way you're inhaling the musky scent of him, moaning prettily as you do.
"mm, fuck," eddie groans quietly, hips shakily punching up when you finally sink down over the head of his cock properly with your lips wrapped tightly around your teeth, the wet heat of your mouth enveloping him in a way that makes him feel fucking insane.
he didn't know it would feel like this. his brain is gonna explode, scanners style.
your hand reaches blindly for his, guiding his fingers to slide into your hair, and his eyes fly open to meet yours, a pretty haze covering your orbs as you nod slightly to give him the go-ahead to curl his fingers.
"ha, you're gonna fucking kill me," eddie murmurs, but he's gently pulling ever so slightly from the root at the base of your skull, because he may be a virgin but he's not fucking clueless, right? he's read enough skin mags to know how to pull hair properly.
you whimper high pitched and your eyes finally flutter closed, letting eddie move you up and down with his firm hand as you alternate between sucking and drooling all over his length.
he's aware that he's looking at you like he's in love, okay? he can't help it. you're literally sucking the soul out of him, moaning around his girth and running your tongue over him like he's the best thing you've ever tasted. like he said before, he's weak.
"you- you're so good at this, oh my god," eddie's eyes roll back into his head when your free hand runs from where it's gripping the meat of his thigh to slide between his obscenely wide legs and cup his balls, rolling and squeezing them between your fingers.
the room is filled with the whining, high-pitched noises that eddie's really trying his best to hold in at risk of sounding like an absolutely pitiful virgin, and the wet noises of your mouth working over his cock, the slick slide of your fist jerking off what you can't quite reach.
eddie's stomach clenches, and holy fuck this is over too quick, but he can't find it in himself to be embarrassed because, because-
"i'm coming, you're making me come, holy fuck-" eddie's words die with a groan that sounds breathy and pathetic even in his own ears, his fingers burying so tight in your hair and pulling as he arches in on himself and jerks his hips in aborted little thrusts. he feels the plush of your lips brush against the wild, untamed curls at the base of his cock and he lets out a weak grunt, feels his length throb and spurt out another weak dribble of come at the sensation.
he's so delirious when he finally comes to that he's all but dragging you up from where your knees have to be aching on the floor, dragging you into his lap, and fuck sake his soft cock is still out and covered in spit and come and-
your mouth is on his in a hot press of lips and teeth and tongue, eddie's so out of his element here but the taste of his own spend on your tongue is as addictive as it is mildly disgusting.
"you got a mattress in the back of that van of yours?" you mumble between kisses, smiling into it.
"mhm, yup, a-ha," eddie nods wildly as he chases your mouth with his own, "i think i need some more stress relief. i hear burying your face between a pretty things legs helps."
eddie definitely does feel like he's dying when your thighs wrap around his ears and lock him in face-first.
and what a way to go that is.
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gojosprettyprincess · 6 hours ago
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𝜗𝜚˚⋆ UNCLE KENTO.
Tw - a bit dubcon, vibrator usage, age gap. Idk what this is. Not proofread
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Dad’s best friend Kento pressing the pink vibrator that he found hidden inside your drawer flushed against your swollen clit while you’re sitting on his stiff cock. He’s buried all the way inside of your cramped cunt— filling up every existing space to the brim.
You can feel his plump, mushroom-shaped tip expertly pressing and rubbing against your sensitive g-spot as he places gentle kisses on your temple, urging you to stay quiet or else your parents will hear from the other room.
“Nanami… it feels weird—“ you whimpered softly, You stared down at the buzzing wand that’s assaulting your poor clit— the vibrating sensation making your legs tingled because of how overwhelming it felt along with his cock molding your insides at the same time. It was nothing that you’ve felt before.
It was quite embarrassing to have your dad’s best friend seeing you all exposed like this, considering how close and familiar Kento has always been with you and your parents. He’s practically like family so It made you rather, shy.
You slightly squirmed on his big lap, feeling his hard muscles tense in response, causing him to let out a low guttural groan before he quickly cleared his throat because of the sudden movement of your velvet walls contracting around his sensitive cock.
“Nanami? I’m sure your father raised you better than to call your elders by their name like that” he uttered sternly, almost sounding disappointed as he increased the vibrator’s intensity. “It’s Uncle to you, Darlin’.. Uncle Kento”.
Your head unwittingly collided with his firm chest, jolting you with the overwhelming scent of his minty, expensive cologne that clouded your senses. “S-sorry uncle!” You stammered as you sheepishly apologized to your uncle, prompting a fond chuckle from him because of how adoringly cute you are. So respectful and sweet.
He never intended to disrespect your father in this manner, having his needy cock cockwarmed by his daughter's tight, warm pussy and completely stretching and ruining it for any other man but what he’s doing isn’t entirely wrong… at least he’s someone your dad trusted and knows, that’s poking deep inside your cunny and not some young, stupid dude that would take advantage of a sweet girl like you.
He always thought you were a pretty little thing, always so nice and respectful— offering him his favorite green tea and the delicious cookies you baked every time he visited your home. Your thoughtfulness towards him never went unnoticed; You’re so precious to him so it’s only safe if your first time is with someone as mature and experienced as him. Someone who will be gentle and handle you like a fragile rose petal.
He never intended to accidentally stumble across the vibrator while he was searching for your charger in your drawer. You were in the shower, and he was staying over at your place for the night, so he required a charger and your dad told him that he could burrow yours. But he just couldn't ignore the pink wand poking from between your clothes. It caught his eye.
To his horror, you weren’t as innocent and pure as he once thought you were but that’s okay because it’s all for him. Uncle Kento will take good care of you.
He’s planning on teaching you about a lot of things, first starting with how to properly use the vibrator and taking his fat cock, both at the same time.
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witherby · 11 hours ago
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What would happen if Mouse got sick? Like super, probably at deaths door kind of sick? ok maybe that last part was exaggerating it a bit...But like almost 39 degrees fever, coughing to the point of gagging and vomiting, runny nose, fatigue, no appetite for anything, etc. Based off my own experiences when I get sick. I wanna know what they would do and who would panic the most. Who would lose the little sleep they already have even more. Who would think that the babeh is at deaths door. And who would be the most relieved when Mouse is better a few days later with the help of a paediatric approved medication
-🍨
I like this prompt a lot so I'm gonna do it. Hope u reaaaally like angst tho.
The Littlest Wayne: Sick Bed, part 1
Masterlist is Here!
⚠️ Spoiler/content warning: Young sick child, fever, depiction of seizure ⚠️
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It starts with a cough.
"Hey, careful," Jason says, patting your back. The water you'd been sipping sprays across the table as you choke. Tim reaches over to right the glass and Alfred goes and collects a rag to mop up the mess. "You okay?"
"Mhmm," you mutter, wiping your mouth with a napkin. "Sorry...I can clean it, grandpa Alfie."
"It's quite alright, Flittermouse." Alfred gently runs a hand through your hair. "Oh, my, you're quite warm. Why don't you head up to your room and I'll have someone bring a tray to you with soup and crackers?"
"Okay." You push your chair away from the table and duck underneath it, allowing the shadow of the furniture to swallow you up. Bruce watches the dark blob you've become slide out of the dining room and towards the stairs with less energy than usual.
"I'll take it, Alfred," Dick says before anyone else can volunteer, rising from his seat. He sets his leftovers in front of Jason as he passes, helping the butler prepare a tray for you. "Do we have any Tylenol for little kids? If not, I can just crush up a half-pill for them."
"Child-friendly medications will be found in the young master's en-suite bathroom cabinet," Alfred says. "It will just be a few minutes for the soup, Master Dick. I'd recommend you head upstairs and measure out a small dose for your sibling before it's ready."
"Kay, sure," he nods, excusing himself.
Dick hops up the stairs two at a time and enters the family wing of the manor, trailing his hand along the walls and door frames until he finds yours. He knocks lightly and rapidly, a silly little sequence to let you know which brother it is, then opens the door to let himself in.
Your bedroom is almost pitch black. Since the development of your powers, your space has changed to reflect your needs overtime, which means the overhead lightbulbs have been removed and the sheer, pastel blinds over your window have been replaced with thick blackout curtains. For your family who require some form of illumination to see, you have several night lights you pick and choose from; you currently have a round projector plugged in that casts aurora borealis across the ceiling (a gift from Tim) and you've activated the touch sensors installed in the floor that briefly light up everywhere Dick walks, leaving his footprints behind for several seconds until they fade away.
The furniture you originally had, designed in warm, woody colors with bright accents, have also been replaced with black hardware and dark materials. Your bed frame is a dip-dyed wood with silver accents, your mattress and sheets are black, and your dressers, nightstand, and closet have all been painted to match.
At first glance, the large bedroom looks like every goth kid's biggest dream, but the light from the hallway spills briefly into your space when Dick walks inside, showing the bright, colorful books sitting on your black bookshelves, the even more colorful clothes in your wardrobe, your vast collection of toys, and a litany of pictures and photos on all the walls. There is a vibrant, beautiful life in the darkness, which encapsulates you perfectly in his opinion.
"Hi, Flitty," he greets, moving slowly as his eyes adjust to the light. "Alfred's working on your soup, so big bro Dicky's here to do medicine time. Holler at me so I don't accidentally step on you in here."
"Okay," you say from his left. Dick turns and squints, spotting a lump on your bed. He smiles.
"There you are. Lemme see if there's any of the gummies in your med cabinet. Those ones don't taste all gross."
He steps into your bathroom and turns the fairy lights on, bathing the area in a soft glow, and rifles through your cabinet for a minute. Then he makes his way to your bed, sitting on the edge of it with some chewables and a glass of water.
"C'mere," he says, and you comply, shuffling across the bed to give him a quick hug. "Alright. Can you show me you're a big kid and take this for me? Then you'll get a nice bowl of soup and maybe some juice."
You comply without fuss. Dick hears more than he sees you take the medication in the low light, and you go back to hugging him when you're done. Dick wraps his arms around you and lies down, propping you mostly on his chest.
"You okay?" He asks.
"Yeah. Just sleepy," you reply. "And my throat hurts kinda, from when I spit my water."
"Aw, I'm sorry. You only need to stay awake long enough to take a couple bites and then you can rest as long as you want."
"Okay...stay?"
Dick hums, running his fingers gently through your hair. He was supposed to go back to Blüdhaven this afternoon, but...
"Yeah, Flitty. I'll stay."
--
It turns into a fever.
"I'm sorry to turn you away when you've already come by, Delilah," Bruce says, meeting your private tutor in the vestibule. "Mouse came down with something yesterday, and I don't think they'll be up for lessons for the next few days. I forgot to tell you."
"Oh, that's absolutely no problem, mister Wayne," the tutor smiles, shaking her head. "I wish them a speedy recovery! Let me know if there's anything you need."
"I will, thank you. Take care!"
Bruce closes the door after seeing her out, the Charming Socialite mask slipping off his face as he heads for the stairs. He meets Alfred at the top with a nod, stepping past him and walking up to your bedroom door.
He gently knocks three times against the glossy wood, calling your name. "Can I come in?"
After a moment, he watches it click open, and you squint up at him in the doorway.
"Hi, daddy," you croak, voice dry and harsh from the progression of your flu. Bruce tuts and scoops your clammy body into his arms, carrying you back to your bed.
"Honey, you didn't have to come greet me," he says, "manners get thrown out the window when you're sick, remember? Let's get you tucked in."
You don't fuss or complain, which makes the worry flare up in Bruce's mind. He pushes it back, refusing to catastrophize a cold. All of his children get sick, it's not unheard of. A little fever is fine, and so is your lack of excitable energy. It's normal and expected.
"How do you feel?" He asks, pulling the blankets up to your chest. You squirm a bit, kicking them down.
"Hot," you say, "sleepy."
Bruce compromises by tucking the blanket around your tummy instead. You don't push it down any further. He pulls out a thermometer from his pocket and scans your forehead.
"Yeah, you are running a bit hot," he admits. An even one hundred degrees. Should be easy enough to control with careful attention. "Alfred says you refused breakfast this morning. Do you want to try eating something small for lunch? More soup?"
You shake your head. "Not hungry."
"I know you're not hungry, pumpkin," Bruce says, gently squeezing your hand. "But you don't wanna starve, either. Then you'll shrink up like a raisin! How am I supposed to snuggle a raisin?"
You smile a bit and give a wheezy huff of laughter. Bruce smiles back.
"So, will you try? You can have anything you want. I just need to see you take a few bites of something."
"Okay, daddy. Want...um... I want more soup please."
"You can have more soup," Bruce promises, running a hand through your sweatslick hair. He reminds himself to run you a bath in a couple hours. Maybe after a nap. "Do you want anything else?"
"Mmmyeah. Bedtime story?"
"Yeah," he says. "Any story you want, after we get some soup in you."
You smile again. It eases the knot of dread in Bruce's chest.
--
It gets worse.
Three days into it, your fever spikes in the middle of the night. You completely refuse any sort of food or drink all day, despite the angry growling of your stomach, and the family unanimously decides to bring you to the hospital in the morning to get looked at. Dinner without you is full of worry and tense glances toward the family wing, and it seems like not a lot of sleep is going to be had before they find out the total extent of your illness.
When tossing and turning in bed for a few hours doesn't lead him anywhere, Damian decides to give in to the nagging in the back of his head and pop in your room to check on you. He rushes to your bed when he sees you seizing and gasping for breath. Your temperature's shot up to a hundred and six and you don't react when he tries to shake you awake.
Fearful and, for once, feeling every bit the child he still is, he clutches your body to his chest and screams.
"BABAA!!"
The door slams open in seconds, though to him it feels like an eternity. Hal and Jason are coaxing Damian to let go of you and Bruce climbs on the bed to roll you onto your side, carefully wiping the foam and drool away from your mouth while he checks your vitals. Tim is in the hallway calling 9-1-1 and texting Dick to let him know what's happening.
"Dami, you gotta move," Jason says, placing his hands overtop his brother's. Damian's grip on your arm is so tight it's bruising. "Let go, they're okay. Let go."
"I'm tracking their pulse, you dumb bastard!" Damian snaps. "Release me!"
"You're hurting them, Dames," Hal says in his ear, wrapping his arms around Damian's waist. "Bruce has them, now. You have to let go and get out of the way for the paramedics."
Green eyes snap to your arm. He seems to finally take stock of what he's doing and eases off, letting Hal pick him up and pass him off to Jason, who carries him into the hallway.
"Stay out here," Jason says. "It's our job to keep out of the way for now."
"Who's going to let the paramedics in?" Damian asks, trying to pry himself out of Jason's grip. As much as he tries to crane his neck, Jason's standing too far away from your door to let him see how you're doing, and his iron grip is unyielding.
"Alfred's by the gate controls, he'll let them inside."
Tim gets off the phone with the emergency dispatcher and glances at your door with a frown. Every hitching gasp and choke you make can be heard from the hall, along with Bruce and Hal's barely-concealed, panicked murmuring, and he crosses his arms tightly and shuffles over to Jason now that his task is done.
"Can we wait downstairs?" He mutters. Jason keeps one arm wrapped around Damian and slings the other around Tim's shoulders, guiding them to the staircase.
"I want to stay!" Damian insists, pulling against Jason, who ends up needing to sling the little assassin over his shoulder to get him to move. "Todd!!"
"Robin," Jason snaps in his best Batman impersonation. It's a damn good one, because Damian quiets immediately, stiffening in his arms and ceasing his struggling without further protest. Tim freezes beside him, but Jason just pats his back and keeps guiding him down the stairs.
The trio is quiet as they file into the main living room. Jason and Tim sit on the couch and Damian gets propped up in his brother's lap. Try as he might, he can't wiggle out of Jason's arms.
"This is asinine," he hisses. "I should be up there."
"Doin' what?" Jason asks. "Bruce and Hal are both in there with Mousey. Alfred's about to guide the EMTs inside. Tim called 911 and then told Dick the situation. You were the one that first found 'em and got help."
Jason gives Damian a squeeze, propping his chin on top of his head.
"You saved their life, Damian. Ya don't need to do more than that right now. Let the grown-ups take the reins for a while."
"But I —"
"You've done more than enough," Jason insists, not unkindly. His tone has been uncharacteristically soft the whole time, Damian realizes belatedly. "I'm sure they'll thank you when they come out the other side of this."
Damian didn't do it for your thanks. He did it because he loves you. Despite you quickly approaching the age where Bruce might offer you the Robin mantle soon, which has filled him with more anxiety and anger than he's had in a long time, he loves you dearly and doesn't want anything to befall you.
In spite of everything, he's your big brother and he loves you just as much as he can't stand you.
"They will be fine," he mutters firmly. "There's no alternative."
"Right," Tim speaks up. He sounds like he needs the reassurance just as much as Damian. "M is gonna be okay."
The three of them turn their heads when several pairs of footsteps enter the vestibule. Four paramedics rush in with a stretcher and duffel bags of medical equipment. Alfred orders them in the direction of your bedroom with simple, firm instructions, and they head off.
The butler then turns, spotting them out of his periphery, and he clears his throat and adjusts the belt around his robe. He's still in his sleepwear, having rushed out of bed to help prep for the emergency like everyone else.
"I've had my fair share of exciting nights," he comments, "but I must say, they never become more enjoyable. Why don't you all join me in the kitchen and I'll prepare some drinks? Hot chocolate should suffice on a chilly evening."
"Sounds fantastic," Jason says, hopping to his feet. He lifts Damian up with him, denying him the chance to refuse, and with a glance and jerk of his chin, coaxes Tim to get up and follow after.
"Put me down," Damian says, reaching up to tug on Jason's night shirt. "I won't run back upstairs. I swear."
"Yeah? You double-swear? Don't make me chase you, kid, I really do not have the patience."
"On Father's life," he insists.
Jason sets him on the floor. Damian follows them into the kitchen and takes a seat at the island, cupping his hands around a warm mug of hot cocoa when Alfred hands it to him a couple minutes later. He watches the wisps of steam curl up into the air and dissipate, unable to stop thinking about your writhing body in bed. Your eyes had rolled back and your limbs had locked up, jerking uncontrollably. And the noises you were making...
The mug gives a foreboding creak under his grip. Alfred gently places his hand on Damian's back and gives it several soft pats.
"Do not fret, master Damian," he says, "our little Flittermouse is very resilient. An illness turning poorly won't keep them down for long."
"I know," he says. Alfred nods, and with a final brush against his shoulder, tends to Tim next to ensure he's also doing okay. When Damian looks at Jason, he sees him calmly drinking from his mug without so much as a furrow in his brow. But there's an almost imperceptible ricketing noise that means he's bouncing his leg nervously. It makes his stomach twist almost painfully, to know he's just as scared as everybody else.
Damian takes a deep breath. He sips his coco. He thinks of the froth pouring out of your mouth when Bruce rolled you into the recovery position. He puts the mug down.
He knows you'll be okay. You have to, because he just can't live with the alternative.
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thewickedbohemian · 1 day ago
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I understand some of your points and I'm sorry about the arguing with uninvolved people thing, leftover anger from having argued with them, trying to work on my anger issues with mental health professional help. However, while I do agree that the current government deserves being taken down as both a Jew and an autistic person with a literal mind I feel a little bit uncomfortable with not only people being quick to jump to that kind of terminology for it but people acting like any Nazi parallels at all are a slippery-slope to paralleling what ensued so closely (as closely as we can without literally turning into Germany and/or shifting back almost a century in time though I wouldn't be surprised if I saw someone at least joke about, like, Trump starting to grow a toothbrush mustache as his hair turns brown etc.) that this same exact shit will happen in around 90 years to whatever country plays the role in the non-nuclear WWIII that'd be needed to take him down that America played in WWII and so on.
One can still say he's a bad guy who needs to be deposed in another sooner way than just an election in 2028 without thinking he's as literally Hitler as he can be while still being Donald Trump. But if you're so bent on the comparison, how did Hitler die (as Inglorious Basterds wasn't a documentary)? Also when was the last time a guy like that was overthrown by a populist revolution that didn't immediately start biting its own tail and making enemies of the state of the not-revolutionary-enough?
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