#and sometimes i suddenly get really tired for a few minutes and then i'm not tired anymore

[my-mind-is-afk-rn]

Starting to realise a LOT of ideas I had about what was wrong with me back in middle school before they were shot down by adults with limited medical knowledge and I forgot about them..... may have actually been true

[postracehair]

a small request

max verstappen x reader | 2k

even world champions deserve love letters. after missing the mexico gp, you're determined to see max have a good weekend in brazil. maybe all it takes is a handwritten note.

cw: fem!reader, being in love, softness, a track-side kiss, love letters. and google translate, sorry to any dutch speakers.

a/n: was this inspired by that video from austin? yeah, it was! sue me! also, written/posted before the gp, so. no race details <3 xx

__

You miss race weekend in Mexico. It happens. You can't be there every weekend, much as you'd like to be. You're even more peeved about it after, considering you quite like Carlos and wish you had seen him earn what very well might be his last win with Ferrari. But you're mostly upset because Max, though he won't say so, could probably have used your support.

Years of experience have him calm, cool, and collected despite the team troubles. Flippant, some headlines say. Mad Max, others. But you know he's probably just tired. Tired of the media, of the FIA, of the churning conflict between him and Lando -- something you all knew was coming someday, but maybe not so suddenly. The longest season ever continues to drag and drag and drag.

"Twenty seconds was...Christ, Max," you say. You know what happened, of course. You watched what you could, saw the sharp moves around the corner and heard the radios. It never gets easier, watching him take risks like that. Usually, everyone else backs off, but McLaren can see victory on the horizon and won't let it go. You can't blame them, either of them, you just wish it was all a bit less tense.

"I know," he says, voice raspy over the connection. "I -- well, you know how I feel about it. Don't want to say anything in case the FIA is tapping my phone."

You laugh into your hand so you don't disturb the other people in the airline lounge, not entirely used to places like this, still. Max has told you over and over that it's absurd for you to spend your own money when you're coming to see him all over the world. When you told him you moved things around so you could come to Brazil, he booked you the nicest ticket, per usual.

"Oh, ha, ha," you say. "Don't give them any ideas, Mr. Community Service." You sigh. "Do you need anything? Be honest."

"Aren't you at the airport already? Your flight should be leaving in --" A pause, like he's checking his watch -- "forty minutes."

You glance up at the departures screen. He's right, but you don't give it to him so easily. "Know my schedule, do you?"

"Well, I booked your ticket, so I should think so."

"Your assistant booked it, you mean."

He hums and you picture him in his hotel room, maybe at the window, looking over the city. "I know your flight information. Don't be silly."

"I mean it, Max," you say again. "Is there anything I can do to make the weekend better?" It's a bit of a useless question and you expect him to answer with a snarky get me a new car or apply for the position of steward.

But he doesn't. He clears his throat.

"I'm just glad you're coming," he says, softly. "I've missed you."

You never doubt how Max feels about you, but he must be pretty tired to admit it like this. He's all about actions, this man. Making sure you have what you need when you're at the track, arranging your travel, remembering your schedule. He shows you how much you matter, and that's more than enough. He never wants to make you feel bad for having a life beyond being his girlfriend. And this doesn't, not really. It just makes you ache, fills your chest with the hopeless affection you've felt for him for so long.

"I've missed you, too," you reply. "But I'd like to be useful."

"Oh, I can think of a few things, then," Max says, all of a sudden all cheek. Such a boy, sometimes. A boy in love.

You can't help but laugh, face hot. "Hush, you!"

He huffs. A few beats of silence, the comfortable, well-worn kind. Sometimes, when he's halfway across the world and up late on the sim, he'll call you just to hear you breathe.

"Max?"

"I -- do you remember what you did for my birthday?"

He'd wanted something small, quiet. There was a lot of work to be done with the team but three weekends off meant you had a little time to yourselves. A few days hardly leaving his place, a dinner with some of the guys, a cake you made yourself, hand-delivered in bed. Gifts for a very wealthy man are difficult, especially since Max doesn't seem to want much.

"Oh, the pillow with my face on it?"

Max laughs. The lounge loudspeaker announces that your flight is going to board soon, so you gather your things but keep your phone wedged next to your ear.

"No, the other thing," he says. He clears his throat and summons some of that World Champion courage. "The letter."

You'd written him a fairly long love letter, thinking it would be a nice thing to carry to the races you couldn't be at this fall. It was tempting to be embarrassed about it when you gave it to him the morning of his birthday, but his cheeks had gone pink and he'd buried his face in your neck.

"Oh, that," you say. The airport is busier outside the lounge and you push your case in the direction of your gate weaving between. people.

"You could write me another, maybe."

Max is direct. He is honest, at work and at home, but this surprises you a little.

"You do know I'm about to get on a plane to see you, right?"

He huffs, and you imagine his cheeks pink, eyes bright. "You asked!"

"I'll write you another love letter, Max Verstappen," you assure him. "I'll write you a hundred."

"One is a fine start," he says firmly. "You should be boarding soon, and I've got to go to the press conference. Text me when you've landed?"

"Of course," you reply, eyes rolling though he can't see. "I'll see you soon, okay? Love you."

"Love you, liefje."

On the plane, you tear out some pages from your journal. You'd prefer to have some nice stationery like what you wrote on for his birthday, but maybe this is more romantic, more real. Making do with that you've got because he asked.

In the last one, you told him your memories of when you first met. How your stomach swooped when you made him laugh, how his blue eyes wouldn't leave your dreams. In this one you tell him about when you first realized you loved him. How absurdly early you were sure, how badly you wanted to tell him for weeks. The way you remember every second of when you blurted it out -- his face, his smile. His voice in your ear, telling you over and over, geliefde, ik houd van je, zo veel. I love you, so much.

"You're working hard on that," someone says. You look up at your seatmate, a woman a few decades older than you with a heavy accent.

You feel a little like you've been caught doing something illicit, but you just smile at her. "For my boyfriend," you tell her. "A love letter."

She flattens her palm over heart and sighs. "How lovely," she coos. "I hope he takes care of you, too."

We take care of each other, you want to say. You could tell her about how he sends you postcards from every country he goes to after you told him you like to put them on your fridge. You could tell her how sometimes you text him during his streams to make him laugh on camera. How he remembers your favorites, how he saves you his special team gear, how he sends you flowers all the time. How he likes to sit on the couch, your toes under his thigh, fingers around your ankle. How you've been learning Dutch and how he patiently corrects your pronunciation. You could go on and on and on.

"He does," you say instead.

__

The plane lands safely in Brazil, but the pilot tells you that there is no open gate and that you'll be sitting for a while. You text Max.

stuck on tarmac, will be later than expected! :(

He must be in media responsibilities still because he doesn't reply until you finally get off the plane.

go relax at the hotel. i'll see you for dinner!

You find your ride easy enough and take a deep breath. The letter you wrote on the plane feels heavy in your pocket, and you just want to see Max. To be near him again. To give him this small thing he asked for.

"Excuse me," you say to the driver. "Do you think we could go to the track, instead?"

You text Max's assistant to say you're headed there, hoping it's not too much of an inconvenience. You're told he's almost done, maybe an hour left, and when you arrive you're led to his driver rooms. His shit is everywhere, per usual. Max is quite neat except in here -- Carmen once told you that George is the same. Clothes strewn about, his race boots unlaced and left in the way, warm-up equipment in a pile. On the table are a few of his things -- his wallet, a notebook, some papers.

Wait a second. One of those papers looks...familiar. It's been folded in three, the envelope it came in nowhere to be seen. His name is scrawled on the blank side in your hand and when you tug it from the pile you can see that it's creased, the edges a little more worn than when you gave it to him a few months ago. Max Verstappen, three-time World Champion, actually carries around the love letter you wrote him. Brings it to the track. It's darling. You love him so much. You pull the new one from your pocket and set them side-by-side on the table where he'll find them.

You ask to be taken to the pit wall, please, so you can see whatever the drivers are doing on track. Some dedication, you're told. The timing ends up being perfect and you get there just as they're finishing. You lean on a gap in the barrier where, on Sunday, crew members will be holding timing signs as the drivers zip around the hot pavement. The crowd in the stands is loud, as always, and maybe you imagine it but it seems to get a little louder when you look out.

The guys are talking amongst themselves and a few of them wave at you. You spot Max as he turns away from Charles and you can't help but grin. His eyes meet yours under his cap and his entire face chances, softens, and he breaks into a jog. You lean out over the concrete ledge and meet him in a kiss that's more two smiles pressed together than anything else.

"This is a surprise," he says when he pulls away. Eyes sparkling, he shows no signs of rejoining the other drivers as they head to whatever their next thing is. Photos, probably.

"I missed you," you tell him. "I've left you something in your room."

"Oh?" He straightens the lanyard of your credentials with careful fingers.

You reach for him, palm on his cheek. His stubble tickles and he leans into it ever so slightly. It doesn't feel like there are thousands of eyes on you, not even a little.

"Yeah," you say. "As promised." Someone calls his name. "Go on, then. I'll be waiting."

He kisses you again, a quick brush of his lips on the corner of your mouth.

Later, you'll wake from your nap in the hotel room to those same kisses on your cheeks, your forehead. Max will gather you in his arms and tell you all the moments he almost told you he loved you, how he could hardly believe when you said it first. You'll tease him for how many times he's read that first letter and he'll cheekily say that's why he needs more. And you will write him more, you'll write him as many as he wants. As many as you can, for the rest of your lives.

But now, in front of thousands of screaming fans, he smiles at only you, boyish and pleased.

[unluckilyimnot]

Could you please do a the bofurin boys (especially sugishita) with a reader who's nonverbal with everyone except them?

no verbal s/o except with them - suo, sakura, kaji, sugishita, kiryuu, umemiya

asked by @lost-in-thought-bookworm

Note: hiiii it’s been such a long time I haven't written with them, I’m happy ! i hope it's not bad tho, I'm rarely going non-verbal myself so I hope it's ok

Suo

he teased you at first, saying you were very shy to not even say a word

but when he realized it’s with literally with everyone and that people still interacted fine with you, he got protective around you

if anyone mess with you, they mess with him as well

He knows it immediately when there's something wrong with you, because you're rarely silent around him. He's never obvious about it, gently guiding you where there's less people and keeping you close. You can feel his fingers slowly brushing on the back of your hand. 

“What is it ?” his voice is sweet but commanding, letting you know that you're not moving before he hears about it. Taking your phone out, you're stopped in your motion by his hand and he's shaking his head. 

“I want you to tell me,” he asked furthermore, his face closer to yours now, his nose only a few centimeters away from yours. 

“I'm tired,” you whispered, after a moment and collecting your strength. “I wanna go home.” 

You're rewarded with a soft smile, not the kind of silly smile he gives to most people and kiss your nose. “Then we're leaving.” 

Kiryuu

he’s so happy when you first start talking with him, it’s an understatement, and he doesn’t hide it

you’re his favorite person to talk with and fixate on your voice 

shopping got ten times easier and he’s here for it

“Look ! This one would look so nice on Sakura, don't you think?” Nirei pointed out a shirt while looking at you with big eyes, waiting for you to nod vividly because you usually agree with him. Not this time though. You were out in a store with him and Sakura, waiting for Suo and Kiryuu to come back after they spent some time at the tea’s store. Pointing a particular color on the shirt, you then point at Sakura and make a cross with your arms, signaling them that this color was a no-no for him. 

It was hard to make them understand sometimes, and based on the face Sakura made you were sure he was lost. Before you could take out your phone, the boys came back and Kiryuu passed an arm around your shoulders lazily. “What is it ?” 

Nirei asked them what they thought and, just like you thought, Kiryuu agreed with you. “This color is awful for him, no offense,” said Kiryuu, hoping that Sakura wouldn’t take it harshly. 

“Right ?!” you shouted, smiling his way. 

“It's so much easier when you’re there, Kiryuu,” whined Nirei, not that he hates to go out with you without him. You still type angrily on our phone, ‘you didn’t leave me anytime !’ it showed with your frown, making them laugh. 

Sakura

he’s taken aback because why wouldn’t you talk ?

But he’s sure you didn’t have it easy to be like that so he’s very gentle and patient with you

he talks for you anytime you need

You always get a weird look when the waiter turns to you for your order but Sakura places it for you, that’s something you don’t really get used to. You can’t blame them, they just saw you talking with him but never talk to them or anyone else around the table – if it isn’t just the two of you. Sakura never seems to mind though, well he’s used to being looked at weirdly too. 

“You alright ?” You blink a few times at the question before nodding energetically, but he’s sending you a suspicious look already. “Don’t worry about that, it’ll never change anyway,” he shrugged before going on about last night's event at his school. He goes on for a few minutes, waiting for your answers with a close eye. He's rarely disappointed but when you suddenly look down like that, he's extra careful, just in case you need anything. 

Kaji

he doesn’t hear anyway so it didn’t really matter at first

your friendship was easy thanks to that

but he loves that you talk to him now, it means you trust him enough

Your eyes always light up when you see him coming, it’s like you’re waiting for him all day just to catch a glimpse of him – and he still doesn't know how he feels about it. He takes his headset off, and he knows he’s gonna hear about your day until he walks you home. Giving you a lollipop as well, you tuck your arm with him as you two walk out of the school to nowhere in particular. One hand holding your phone while the other holds the lollipop, just so you can still talk with everyone. 

It always gets him how annoying it might be to talk with him but type for his friends when they ask anything, you could just act like you were talking with him ; but that wouldn’t be welcome from him who spends half of his time with music blasting in his ears. He knows it’s not that easy, but he’s still happy that you answer them and not make any discussion only about you two when they’re around. Plus, it's a little too obvious how happy they are to have you around, hearing you talk even if it’s never to them. He wants all his favorite people to get along.

Sugishita

no need to say that you’re more than compassionate and understand his situation

it took time for you to open up and talk to him, even if he doesn’t always answer

it’s so comfortable for him

He’s not much about talking either, so he never minded at first when it wasn’t really a thing. Then, even when you started talking only with him, it didn’t seem so out of place. He understands it the best, he gets what’s going on in your mind. Hearing your voice isn’t really special anymore, it’s part of his routine and he likes it better that way – why wouldn’t he love hearing your voice when he loves you so much ? 

Mostly, he loves how you can formulate your thoughts despite not doing it much. Deep conversations with you are the best, he likes how well you can formulate your thoughts despite not doing it much or with everyone. It’s hard for him, but he’ll gladly listen to you talk all you want, since it’s specific to him. It’s comfortable, even if you’re not really related to Umemiya – it helps him trust others.

Umemiya

never ever mentioned it, it never mattered to him

he wants you to take your time and talk when you feel safe or feel like it’s the time

even if it never comes

He can't get it out of his head, you actually telling him goodnight yesterday. You stayed a while longer on the rooftop with him, talking about life and anything that comes to his mind until late. You didn't simply waved at him, you told him goodbye. It was the first time he heard your voice and, if he wasn't sure how precious you already were for him, now he's sure.

He doesn't get carried away anyway, maybe it was a one time thing – which was fine. Deep down, he can't wait to see you, just to see if you’ll talk to him or not. His heart flutters when he sees you making your way to him with Toma on the rooftop. You're typing on your phone, showing him quickly before you smile with a nod at his answer. You turn his way once closer and wave at him. 

“Hi, Ume,” you say softly. A small gasp can be heard but nobody mentions it otherwise. He swears his heart was beating a second ago. He smiles at you, holding back from crushing you in his arms. 

After that, it became normal to hear you talk around Umemiya. You never answer without your phone to others, even next to him, but your soft whispers can always be heard – to everyone's pleasure. And for Umemiya, it's a victory. It got him holding his breath every time, full of joy to see you this comfortable with him. 

Let me know if you liked it !

[brawberryz]

⎯⎯ Blind Love

⎯⎯ Jason Todd × Blind! Reader

Note: English is not my first language/ inspired by the manga Veil / M.list

TW / None,i just a little drabble

Snow fell in torrents through the city streets.

The snow painted the streets a white color, giving life to this dead city.

Your footsteps echoed through the cold city streets like a small tinkling sound.

You stood out among all the citizens, having such a charming yet simple style.

Your cane tapped the ground as you walked slowly down the street.

You were supposed to get to your new apartment, but you were lost, and being blind wasn't much help either.

Maybe you should have asked for a guide, but you wanted to be independent.

You grew up your whole life in a very overprotective family because of your disability, which bothered you.

They treated you like you were made of glass, as if you were going to break at some point.

You were tired of so much overprotection, so you decided to move to a new place.

But apparently you overreacted and ended up moving not only to another city but also to another country.

You were so confident in yourself. You didn't even notice you were lost, and someone like you on the streets of Gotham wasn't the best idea.

You were so distracted by your thoughts that your cane collided with someone's foot, causing you to stop dead in your tracks when you heard a small sound of pain as your cane hit the stranger.

"Ah! Excuse me..."

You said embarrassedly, apparently you ended up colliding with a stranger who was sitting on a bench.

It was only your first day here and you'd already messed up. You apologized several times without letting the stranger speak.

"I'm really sorry, I didn't hurt you, right?"

A small, awkward silence formed between the two of you until the stranger deigned to speak first.

"Don't worry, I've taken worse hits."

He said ironically. You just nodded, still embarrassed, but you could feel the man getting up and you could feel his imposing figure in front of you.

It's not that he's shorter, it's just that he was too tall.

"Wow, you're really tall!" You said without thinking about your words. You were someone who tended to say things without thinking, and that sometimes got you into trouble. "Sorry, I didn't mean it like that."

"No, calm down, it's okay."

Jason noticed from your nod. You weren't from this place. It was easy to spot someone new when they'd spent their entire life in this city.

"Hey, do you know this place?"

You asked suddenly, handing her a small piece of paper with all the information she needed written down, but they seemed to have forgotten that you were blind.

"Oh yeah, sure."

Jason took the paper as he read it, but all he could think about was how a person could stay with their eyes closed for so long.

Those doubts, though, were answered after seeing the cane and how you couldn't read something as simple as this paper.

Noticing that so late made him feel like an idiot.

"You should go straight and then turn left. On your right, you'll find your destination."

He said, trying to be as clear as possible. You just nodded happily and then took out your cane again.

"Thank you so much for the help!"

You said before returning with your slow steps. Something in him told him he should follow you and keep you safe.

You were new to Gotham, and your blindness made you easy prey for criminals.

Besides, he was a hero, or a good antihero, but he still had a desire for justice and to protect others, and he couldn't let someone like you walk the streets of Gotham.

"Careful, there's a staircase there!"

He yelled at you from afar when he saw you about to step on a step wrong. You just turned your head and nodded with a small laugh.

"I know, you shouldn't worry."

Your steps were slow but refined as you climbed the stairs. Something in Jason's chest burned every time he sensed something dangerous for you.

He had only met you a few minutes, but he already felt strange.

What the hell was happening to him?

"Are you sure? Is there no one to accompany you, or are you alone?"

He asked curiously, and you just nodded, not paying much attention.

You didn't need anyone's protection. You'd spent your whole life being overprotected, and you didn't need anyone else to worry about you.

"You shouldn't worry. Besides, let me warn you, following me won't get you to Wonderland."

Jason just arched at your sudden comment.

"Do I look like Alice to you?"

You could only let out a small laugh at the man's question.

"Well, maybe a little, but don't be offended, it's my favorite story!"

'She laughed...' That was the only thing Jason could think when he heard your laugh.

"Well, maybe you're right," he said as he approached you. "I almost fell into a hole today. It was an open sewer, and I almost fell in because I was too distracted."

"Ah..." You nodded, surprised but a little curious about the man's story. "Oh! Right, I haven't introduced myself. I'm (Name)!"

You felt like an idiot now. You'd spent a few minutes talking to the man, but you weren't even able to ask his name or introduce yourself properly, where were your manners!

"(Name)..." He said, repeating your name as if he were tasting it in his mouth. "You can call me Jason, Jason Todd."

"Nice name," you said, about to say something, but you were hesitant. You didn't know if you should ask him for help or not. But this was your only chance. "Sorry for asking, but do you know any places where we could get tea?"

After walking all over the city, your thirst and appetite had grown, and you thought a good cup of tea would solve everything.

"Uh, well, I know a place. But it's a bit far from here-"

"Really!"

You interrupted him before he could finish his sentence. He just nodded.

"I don't want to sound annoying, but..." You swallowed before continuing. "Could you take me to that place? I'm new around here, and you know...um."

Jason quickly understood the point. He knew you didn't want to seem useless, but he knew you needed help now.

"Yeah, sure. I hope you don't get bored with my company, though. I'm not one for words."

You shook your head in amusement.

"I don't think so. Your company can't be worse than walking down the street alone."

An inaudible laugh escaped Jason's lips. You were a very direct person.

But now that he had you closer, he noticed something. He felt like he'd seen your face somewhere.

And apparently he was right. You looked like one of those models. He saw your face for the first time when he was patrolling as usual.

Your presence was plastered all over that huge billboard that could easily light up an entire street.

Apparently, you were famous, since he'd seen your face on many posters and magazines, but he decided not to ask and kept his curiosity to himself.

"Could you give me your arm?"

"Uh-"

Before he could say anything, you answered.

"I wouldn't want to hit someone with my cane again, so you could be my guide and my eyes?"

"Oh, of course,"

He said, embarrassed, finally understanding what you meant.

You wrapped your hand around his arm and pressed against him. A small blush appeared on Jason's cheeks.

It was just the cold, right?

The blush didn't mean anything. He was just cold, or was that what he wanted to think?

Anyone who saw the two of you would think you were some kind of married couple.

"Now you'll check for any holes, right?"

You said with a small chuckle, reminding him of that incident he'd told you about.

"Of course, I'll try not to be so distracted this time."

You nodded at his comment.

Jason guided you through the snowy streets, slow steps following you as you could feel the cold breeze hitting your face.

You felt happy because after a long time, you had met someone; besides, he seemed like a nice person.

Maybe leaving home and being independent wasn't so bad.

Because if you hadn't, you would never have met him.

And he would never have met someone like you.

Maybe the two of you meeting was a coincidence or a piece of fate.

Or maybe the two of you were meant to be.

I think you should stop overthinking things. If you keep doing this, you'll most likely get some kind of headache.

The important thing is to live in the future.

And stop looking at the past

Jason is so Aleksander Code

Maybe I'll do a part 2 if I'm not too lazy

[vervainandspritz]

CRAWLING BACK TO YOU

Thomas Shelby x Reader

Word count: 4k

Warnings: drinking, swearing, feelings, friends to lovers trope kind of

Notes: Guys thanks for 400 follows love y'all

Was it possible to get used to a life so bizarrely unusual and different to find it… peaceful? Feeling her lungs fill out with fresh air when in reality every piece of clothing Y/N owned was sprinkled with ash of the wild flame that the Shelby family was?

People were scared of getting burned, naturally. Fading in and out of her life as soon as they'd find out she was associated with Peaky blinders.

At first it bothered her, oh, so much. That people didn't see a thing about her besides her association. Now, she was years into the strange peace she found in one of the most dangerous cities in Britain, with a gun settled in her hand so frequently it fit better than the several sets of leather gloves she owned.

A matter running so deep in her mind, she found herself touching it over and over, sometimes with a glimmer in her eyes.

…or like that day, sitting in the Garrison with her gaze fixated on a glass in her hand. Mentally fiddling with the churning in her stomach as his blue eyes filled her head all over again. The room was as loud as ever, accompanied by both men and women in questionable states of sobriety, laughs and conversations that didn't matter. Not one bit.

An upcoming weekend allowed people of Birmingham to loosen up, shake off the tension from the hard work they've been holding in their tired bones.

Nobody seemed to notice when the door swung open, allowing cold air of a Friday night to seep in. Nobody but her.

Footsteps echoed quietly, going unnoticed in the loud crowd but Y/N knew exactly who came in despite her eyes remaining on her glass of rum.

”Y/N, what do you think about him?” A voice came to her ears suddenly, a slight nudge to her side bringing her out of the weird state.

”Hmm?” She asked before quickly glancing at her friend, gaze looking for clues as to not show her disinterest. Emily rolled her eyes with a sigh, dramatically slumping her shoulders.

”Don’t tell me you just zoned out, again, after I just spent five minutes explaining the matter.” She raised her eyebrows while her blue eyes narrowed for a moment before she sighed again. ”Alright. You're lucky I can't be mad at you. What's wrong?” Y/N’s demeanour seemed to be a little different than usual, and knowing her for so long, Emily immediately picked on it.

Okay, maybe not immediately, she thought, but eventually she got there.

Y/N cleared her throat, a chuckle pushing past her lips before she pushed her glass away.

”Nothing really. I haven't eaten much today, and alcohol hit me harder than usual.” Came out of her mouth so smoothly, despite being just partially true.

”And it absolutely doesn't have anything to do with the pack of wolves you surround yourself with, does it?”

Just like that Y/N loosened up again, laughing at the way Emily always so easily joked about them so lightheartedly, as nobody else would dare. ”Speaking of the devil” she added with a smirk, glancing towards the door. ”Yours just appeared. Right on time as well, because I need to wrap it up and go home. Betty refuses to sleep when I'm not home.” Y/N sighed, feeling bad for not paying attention before Emily had to leave.

”Of course,” She nodded, ”Arthur will drive you home” Y/N said, as usual but Emily shook her head while making a funny face.

”Absolutely not! Send the younger one. Arthur can't seem to understand I'm married,” She rolled her eyes with a giggle as she nudged Y/N’s side. ”I’ll wait outside”

As the taller woman walked away, Y/N threw back the remaining liquor and took a deep breath before she got up, looking around.

Before she spotted the Shelby brothers, she felt a heavy gaze on her back which admittedly made things easier. Turning around, her eyes met Tommy's from the other side of the room. He was sober while she clearly already had a few, her gaze a bit softer around the edges. Making her way to their table, she took a deep breath once again.

”John,” Y/N greeted him first with a smile, “would you kindly drive Emily home tonight?” her speech came out a little smoother than usual, tension from her voice long gone which showed her state, already a bit softened by alcohol.

“I don't mind driving her,” Arthur abruptly interjected.

“No, no that's all right Art you're in no state to drive clearly.” She stated firmly with a hint of humour in her voice. His brows shot up.

”I just had ONE drink! Are you mad?” He asked pretentiously with a huff, making John laugh.

”Seems like you need to try harder, aye!” The younger brother chuckled before getting up and standing by Y/N.

”Sure thing, Darling, but you owe me a drink” He winked, making her roll her eyes playfully.

”Sure thing” She repeated, mockingly.

”Someone already had a few” Tommy interjected suddenly, a hint of teasing in his voice, but one only Y/N could pick up on.

”Oh, and you're here as well” She replied, her gaze meeting his once again with that mischievous glimmer. ”Found time to spend among us, Mr. Shelby?”

Thomas watched her for a moment before slowly but surely one corner of his lips twitched in sort of a smirk.

”Sit down before I kick you out of my pub, eh?” He patted the free space where John was sitting just a few moments ago.

And so she did, ignoring his comment while pouring herself a glass of whisky with a smirk. One thing that never changed between them were their verbal skirmishes. Ever since the young blue eyed boy chased her with a stick dipped in the mud, devilishly proud of himself while at it.

Arthur kept mumbling to himself about the unfairness of the situation, unserious as ever. Pouring himself another drink, he glanced at Y/N, feeling her amused look on him.

”Don’t need me as a driver, so let the man be, would you?” He threw in a snarky remark with a hint of amusement, to which she lifted her hands in the air in a gesture of surrender.

”Wouldn’t dare to tell you what to do, old man”

a smirk slowly spread on his face and so the game began all over again. Soon John came back along with other Blinders crowding the table as they drank, talked and had fun just like always while making sure everything in the pub was going just fine.

Y/N’s nonchalant, easygoing aura was strong as ever when Tommy's eyes drifted towards her every now and then. Time was passing by quickly when they had fun simultaneously drinking.

Nights like these were secretly meaningful to all the Shelby's, giving them space and time to forget for a little while about the heavy responsibilities and dangers of their day to day life. It was one of the instances where people could see Tommy slightly let his guard down as the alcohol affected his mind, causing him to behave more freely in a less controlled environment.

A lazy smile appeared on Y/N’s face as she chuckled listening to the colourful stories, obviously enhanced into dramatic details to be more entertaining. She liked seeing them like this, these fleeting moments of freedom making each of the men by the table turn into these young boys she used to know long years ago without the scarring of life they all carried nowadays.

Reaching for a pack of cigarettes sitting on the table, Y/N plucked one for Tommy, putting it into his hand out of habit without even thinking. One of those things she'd do even under the influence, with her better judgement clouded almost completely.

Without looking at her, Tommy put it between his lips, reaching for matches to light her cigarette before his own. The gestures were so natural nobody even noticed.

Putting the little box back on a table, Thomas let his hand fall down, landing on her thigh as his fingers began slowly stroking her soft skin mindlessly as he spoke to Isaiah across the table.

Her eyes drifted briefly on his face, grazing over his strong features and the way his lips remained formed in a relaxed smile as he spoke when suddenly another person got her attention.

A man in the background, about ten feet away from them, stood with a woman, kissing her cheek as she hugged him quickly before disappearing in the crowd.

His familiar features and cocky grin immediately sparked her interest, as she recognised Paul, a good friend of hers who happened to be delivering ingredients to her bakery everyday.

Seeing her, he moved closer before finally standing by the table.

“Evening, Y/N” He spoke up, nodding towards the men who quickly realized he was familiar with her, so not a bother. ”Care to go for a smoke with me?” He suggested, shoving his hands into the pockets of his coat. His light hair dishevelled, eyes shiny from the small amount of alcohol he had as well.

Tommy's hand remained on her thigh, only slipping away as she moved towards the exit.

”Lead the way” She responded, grabbing her coat as well as her eyes briefly met John's who was clearly having a good time tormenting her whenever a man would show any interest.

”See you tomorrow then, aye, Y/N?” John called after her with mischief in his voice followed by a chuckle from Arthur.

She just shook her head with amusement before they disappeared through the door.

Tommy straightened his back, reaching for another cigarette to light, nodding to Isaiah to pour another drink.

”Well..” John started off, clearing his throat, ”At least someone gets some action today” elbowing his brother to the side he laughed, reminding Arthur of the failure in pursuing Emily. One of many.

”Already told you to fuck off, didn't I?” He responded, rolling his eyes before shoving him back.

Tommy remained quiet, his mood taking a hit from Y/N’s abrupt exit with another fella. His emotions usually kept at bay, now strengthened by the alcohol, grew to an alarming size in his head.

Throwing back another glass of whisky he relaxed into the seat once again, barely listening to the conversation as he zoned out, consumed by his contradictory thoughts.

Not long after he decided enough was enough, raising from the seat slowly, letting his brothers know he'd be going back home as tomorrow he had business to attend, as usual. It took a moment for his eyes to regain focus as whisky affected him a bit more than usual, perhaps because once again he forgot to eat anything substantial throughout the day.

Saying his goodbyes Tommy pulled his cap onto his head, walking through the crowd as people parted, not wanting to disrespect the mobster.

Cold air of the night hit him as soon as the door swung open, his eyes getting used to the darkness fairly quickly as he gazed towards his vehicle, simultaneously searching for keys in his pocket.

Making his way to the car he squinted, trying to grasp the right key which was a bit of a challenge in his current state. Getting a hold of the right one, he suddenly dropped the keys hearing a familiar voice behind his back.

”You’re absolutely not driving in this state” Y/N said, grabbing his arm.

”Fuck!” Tommy groaned, eyeing the fallen item. He could barely see them, wiping his eyes he turned towards Y/N. ”I dropped my fucking keys” He informed her, as if she wasn't a witness to this situation.

His balance was slightly off as he narrowed his cloudy eyes, obviously blaming her for what just happened. His drunken state made Y/N unable to hold in a giggle as she rolled her eyes stepping closer. Bending over she grabbed them, choosing the right key as she opened the door on the driver's side, slipping into the seat.

He stood there, his brows raised in a question which she immediately answered.

“I told you. You're not driving. Get into the car before you'll have to walk.” Her voice was lighthearted as she held his gaze.

Thomas tilted his head to the side, the small hint of bitterness making it through his exterior.

”Don’t you have places to be?” He asked, obviously hinting at the man she left with, making Y/N roll her eyes once again on his dramatics.

”Tommy get in the car” She repeated, knowing there was no point in arguing with him over whatever In his current state.

He stood for another longer moment before finally sighing and making his way around to the other side, sitting on the passenger seat. Tilting his head back he let it rest, closing his eyes.

Y/N let her eyes linger on his face for a moment before taking a deep breath and starting the engine.

They didn't say a word throughout the whole drive, and only later she realized Tommy fell asleep. Parking the car she leaned closer, touching his shoulder.

”Come on, let's get inside” She whispered, watching as he slowly opened his eyes in an awfully adorable way.

She bit back the smile as he nodded, mumbling something before climbing out of the car.

She grabbed his arm wanting to help him walk, but he pulled it back, telling her he was perfectly capable of walking alone. Stubborn as always.

A couple minutes later she shed her coat, pulling his own off of him as well along with the cap, making him roll his eyes.

”You realize I'm not that drunk, eh?” He asked, seeing her behaviour.

”I’m not allowed to help, am I?” She shot back, grabbing his hand as she pulled him towards the stairs leading up to his bedroom. ”Oh, and by the way, no. I've got no places to be so I'm staying over.” She stated, completely unfazed and with enough attitude to make him laugh out loud.

”Good to know” He replied, letting her pull him along. Despite his stubbornness, they both knew it happened more times than they'd be able to count. Their relationship was so specific in ways other people wouldn't understand… and neither of them seemed to be ready to admit it.

Thomas was on the edge of bed, groaning as he took off his boots. Y/N walked across the room, opening the wardrobe as she found her own shelf.

He watched her as she pulled out his shirt and her shorts, knowing well she'd be sleeping in this set. Thomas realized he couldn't remember the time before she was in his life. Before the top shelf was hers, filled with pieces of clothing he never cared to move.

She moved around so confidently, knowing exactly where everything was. It brought him a weird sense of comfort, even though his face remained in a neutral expression as she looked back.

”Do you need help changing or are you perfectly capable of doing that too, Mr. Shelby?” She asked, matching his neutral expression along with a professional tone of voice, obviously teasing him.

He shook his head slightly, letting out a sigh as he finally smirked. Looking at her for a longer moment, Tommy let his eyes linger on her body before meeting her eyes again.

”Are you trying to take advantage of me, Dove?” He asked, his voice clearly lower and with intent as he gave her the smile, one he learned long ago worked on women ever since he was a boy.

Y/N chuckled, approaching him to the point where he had to tilt his head back so their eyes could meet. Leaning down to his level, she started unbuttoning his shirt.

”I wouldn't dare” Her voice was calm, even though she felt everything but calm seeing him looking at her like this. Unable to put up the walls that usually surrounded him when he was sober. The tension seemed to grow rapidly as she was halfway down, eyes focused on the task but Tommy's gaze had her face turn slightly red which was not visible in the dim light luckily.

Stepping back, she looked up at him.

”You take care of that, and I'm going to change. Try not to fall, eh?” She teased with a smirk, walking into the bathroom.

As soon as the door closed behind her, Y/N took a deep breath, leaning forward as she needed a moment. She was very aware of the tension surrounding them the whole night and as she stood in front of him, with his eyes gazing at her this way, it felt more dangerous than ever before despite the fact they were bordering on this line for years now.

Everything felt stronger lately and she was.. more anxious than anything.

Looking up she caught her reflection, silently grazing over her face and body before sighing deeply as she turned around, swiftly changing into his shirt and her shorts.

Returning to the room, she looked up to check whether he was sleeping and surprisingly, Tommy was laying on the bed, shirtless and wearing only his undergarments. His arm was draped over his head, eyes closed but the tension in his shoulders was visible. Y/N knew he wasn't sleeping, but she didn't want to risk anything more after today so she let him be, turning off the lights as she moved around the bed, slipping on the other side.

His bed was big, more than big enough for the two of them. Y/N and Tommy never had an issue sleeping together even back when they were teenagers, sharing a bed in his small room in Small Heath.

She covered herself with a blanket, facing away from him for a while, attempting to get comfortable but the silence was deafening. She heard him move and turn as well, looking for a position comfortable enough to sleep in. Minutes were passing and Y/N was still wide awake, unable to even close her eyes for longer than a moment with the amount of thoughts running through her head.

The clock was ticking, and she looked through the big window, moonlight seeping in through the blinds and she still yet to be comfortable enough to feel even remotely tired.

Eventually the frustration took over and she sighed with annoyance, slowly sitting up. Y/N desperately wanted to sleep, as it would be the easy way out. Making it to the morning and hoping the infatuation would pass or fade away into something more bearable, just like always.

The moon looked beautiful that night, she thought, as she heard him move in a different way this time. The mattress dipped closer and she felt him sitting right behind her, the warmth of his body contrasting to the coldness of her hands caused by anxiety.

Her heart started thumping wildly in her chest, the anticipation almost took much to handle, shivers running down her spine as his breath touched her skin.

Yet she didn't dare to look at him, stubbornly keeping her eyes fixated on the view while he moved closer.

After a longer moment his fingers grasped her chin, making her look at him. Tommy felt the stirring too, somewhere in his chest, and the desperation seemed completely impossible to escape.

Forcing her to look at him, he moved closer. His face seemed even more unreal that way, kissed by the moonlight in the middle of the night causing her to sigh weakly.

He didn't move either, not for a while as they watched, fixated like it was the very first time, even though they knew each other’s features by heart. From her chin his fingers moved to cup her cheek instead, feeling the subtle warmth of her skin.

Lost in the moment Y/N sighed, his face so close to her own she could see every detail. Every scar and freckle decorating his skin. Her lips parted slightly as she tried to catch a breath, but his presence and warmth felt so.. overwhelming in a way she couldn't describe. A warmth she grew to associate with safety while simultaneously feeling like she's gambling every time they're close.

His arms wrapped around her tighter, pulling her on his lap with one hand holding her hip while the other cupped her cheek so roughly. Delicate caresses of his calloused fingers feeling better than she cared to admit. She couldn't think properly while his firm chest was pressed against her soft bosom, his lips ghosting over her jaw.

”Y/N” He whispered, Tommy's hot breath against her skin making her shiver and her eyes fall shut.

She moved her hand on top of his, trying to ground herself. Chaotic snippets of moments and thoughts running through her puzzled mind as her core ached for his touch.

”Look at me” He spoke again, tilting her head down to look him in the eyes. His own were barely open, pupils blown out with need as he stared at her with something she couldn't really understand. Failing to keep herself at bay, Y/N slowly leaned down, their breaths mingling and noses touched. She could feel the ghost of his soft lips touching hers, but couldn't quite force herself to let him have her. Again.

“Why do you keep doing this?” She whispered breathlessly, her other hand grasping his shoulder so hard she thought he might bruise.

Thomas' breath hitched, and he stopped moving for a moment, frozen as he realized the sense of her question. His heart began racing but he kept holding her so close, panting against her lips as he tried to search for an answer in his mind, which now seemed to be.. empty.

Y/N squeezed her eyes painfully hard waiting for an answer that seemed to never come before letting go of his shoulder with a humourless chuckle. Pulling his hands away from her she raised from his lap, quickly fixing her blouse before grabbing her black coat from the chair.

”Y/N” He spoke up, his voice gravely with disappointment aimed nowhere but at himself. ”Y/N, don't go” Tommy tried to convince, attempting to grasp her wrist but she slipped easily, seemingly between his fingers.

Like she always did.

”Goodnight, Tommy”

~~~

The whole next day Y/N threw herself into a bunch of work, whether it was around the house or finishing up the new recipes she prepared to introduce in her bakery the upcoming week.

By the end of the day she was covered in flour, but her apartment was squeaky clean. Her hair was a complete mess when she saw herself in the mirror, making her chuckle. She was physically tired but mentally proud of herself for taking her mind off of the blue eyed man so successfully.

…and then her phone rang. It was late, way too late for any other person to call, so subconsciously she knew it was him. Silently cursing herself for it, she picked up.

”Hello?” Y/N asked nevertheless but she didn't hear anything else for a moment before he cleared his throat.

”Because I can't force myself to let you go” Thomas spoke up, his words a little blurred, gravelly with the weight of his confession. ”...and I'm tired of pretending. This needs to end.” A moment of silence seemed to stretch into eternity, but Tommy knew she was listening. He could hear her breathing. As Y/N finally found some words, wanting to respond, he hang up.

She stood there, frozen for a couple moments, holding the phone as if he was still on the other side. What are you talking about, she wanted to ask, but Y/N knew what he meant. Despite her asking yesterday, it intimidated her a little to hear it from him. They never confronted each other before, but.. her heart swelled with the emotion she was never able to express before.

Suddenly a loud knock on the door came to her ears, her heart froze still for a moment before she opened it.

His eyes were bright, raw and vulnerable as he held her eye contact.

“Can I come in?”

[kykyonthemoon]

How to function your very tall boyfriend

Having troubles reaching things that are too high for you? Don't fret. That's what having a really tall boyfriend for.

A request by Sora.

🌻 Character x F!Reader Xavier, Zayne, Rafayel and Caleb (first time writing for Caleb <3)

Tags: soft, sweet, lovers, established relationship. This fic is for short girlies like me out there <3

Masterlist

Request a fic

𝑿𝒂𝒗𝒊𝒆𝒓

You stood on tiptoe, reaching the full length of your arm towards the row of shelves in front of you. A finger touched the box but you still couldn't get it. You looked around the archives, looking for the help of a ladder, chair, or anything. Then, the door opened, and you saw Xavier's face peeking inside.

Without waiting for him to speak, you waved to your savior. You looked at him, then pointed to the box located at the highest position on the shelf. 

"You want me to get it down for you?"

You gave him a nod. And, with a gust of wind, he appeared right next to you.

Your hair was still hanging over your face from the breeze that had just passed. When you recovered consciousness, you noticed that the box you required was in Xavier's hands.

“Wooooooooow!”

That was all you could say. Your eyes widened and looked at him, mixed with admiration and gratitude.

Xavier maintained a somewhat tired expression on his face. He handed you the package and said in a calm tone:

“Do you need anything else?”

Your gaze was still locked on Xavier. As usual, he was already quite attractive, but when he rushed to your side and grabbed stuff for you in the blink of an eye, his coolness grew tremendously in proportion to your heartbeat.

"I need… that one!"

You pointed your finger at another row of shelves. In truth, you already had everything you needed for the mission, but watching more of Xavier using his skills in bringing everything from a higher place down for you wouldn't hurt.

"Okay."

As soon as he finished speaking, Xavier dashed to the shelf before returning to your side. All in a blink of an eye!

"That one too!" You pointed your finger in another way. "This one! That one! Two up there!…”

In only a few minutes, all the boxes stacked on high shelves were brought down and placed around you to form a wall made of cardboard.

"Woooooooow! "Xavier, you're so cool!"

You couldn't help but blurt out, causing the skin on his face below his blue eyes to grow scarlet. He came closer, put the last box in your hand and said:

“I've taken down all the things from higher shelves for you. Isn't it time I received my reward?”

Caught off guard when he suddenly leaned closer, you blushed a little in reply:

“Y-You… What do you want then…?…”

Xavier smiled mysteriously. He turned sideways and pointed at his cheek.

“You already know.”

Embarrassed, you placed a quick kiss on it. Xavier seemed unsatisfied.

“You really don't need all of these boxes, right? I heard that Jena will cut off the bonuses if she catches anyone tampering with the team's records. I can assist you clean up, but the prize must be more than this."

You chuckled. You'd become accustomed to his solicitation tactics.

"Please help me then. I assure you'll be pleased with the latter prize." After that, you lifted up his chin and gave Xavier an even deeper kiss on the opposite cheek.

𝒁𝒂𝒚𝒏𝒆

You were used to visiting Zayne's house every weekend or on days off. Even when he was not home, you still liked to be there waiting for his return. You had a habit of eating snacks, especially sweets. So you brought a lot of things to his house to eat together. And always, he kept them nicely organized in the refrigerator or cupboards over the stove.

But sometimes, he put them out of your reach. At moments like that, you called out his name from the kitchen.

“Doctor Zayne. Doctor Zayne. Doctor Zayneeeee.”

He appeared soon after. On the bridge of his nose was still a pair of reading glasses. He carefully adjusted it and sighed.

“What do you need this time?”

“That jar of fruit gummies.” You pointed at it.

“I'm not your ladder.” Despite his grumbling, Zayne still took it down for you. With his height, it did not appear to be a problem at all.

"Thank you." You said. “I don't want to bother you. Why did you have to put my snacks so high up there?”

“I put it away so some sweet-loving worm doesn't eat too much.”

“I'm not a worm.” You replied, pouting. Zayne patted your head.

"Alright. Would you like anything else?"

Zayne kept telling you not to eat too many snacks, but he still took them all down. He separated them into parts and placed them on a large plate. The rest was put away to make sure you did not consume too much.

Knowing he was concerned about your health, you didn't ask for anything else but ate all of the treats he brought out. However, it was only when Zayne was away that you could properly appreciate his caring nature. Outside your snack cupboard was a letter with Zayne's handwritten words, which you took forever to read. It turned out he had moved your food to another place within your reach. Inside that cabinet was a candy tray with a lid. Zayne had prepared everything for you, with one additional note: Don't eat too much.

You burst out laughing. In response to his concern, you decided to rearrange his working space. Because he had left in a hurry to go to the hospital that day, his books were still not put away. That night, you caught him walking back and forth in front of his bookshelf, his expression rather serious.

“Did you rearrange the bookshelf?”

"Yes."

You replied. He placed his both hands on the bookshelf in front of him, skimming through the book titles printed on the spine. The book he had been reading in the morning was nowhere to be seen. Rather, you slithered right into the gap between his arms, making him turn to face you.

The sudden close distance made him a bit surprised. However, he maintained his composure and gazed down at you. The book he was looking for was in your hand. He smiled:

"What's wrong? You couldn't put it back since you found its place to be too high?"

You said with a pout, "If that's the case, then I won't give it to you."

You hid the book behind your back. WWho would have imagined that Dr. Zayne would boldly lean down, one arm around your waist to draw you in, while the other hand taking the book away from you.

You could hear his heartbeat matching yours as he pressed his body against you to return that book to its proper place on the shelf. He looked down at you, who was extremely confused. You asked:

“Aren't you going to read it?”

"No. I'm preoccupied with something else.”

He leaned down again, and kissed you.

𝑹𝒂𝒇𝒂𝒚𝒆𝒍

Your favorite store had just been redecorated, and the items you needed had been moved elsewhere. Most of them were within your reach, but some decorations with lights were located high up. You turned around to look for help, but the store staff was already busy with another customer. So you looked in the other direction, where you found Rafayel staring at some little decorative fish bowls.

“Rafayel. Please help me get this thing.”

Rafayel turned to face whichever way your finger was pointing. He would waste no effort to reach the lamp you needed. He placed his hand on a spherical night lamp.

"Is this the one?"

"Not that one. The one in purple.”

His hand went to another. "This?"

“Nooooo. I said the purple one…”

"This one has purple in it." Rafayel put his hand on a purple lamp, but it wasn't what you wanted.

“Rafayel. The purple one. In the shape of a jellyfish."

“Hmm…” Rafayel pretended not to see what you described, even though it was right in front of him. "All I see is a seahorse and a whale."

He's definitely teasing you. You scowled:

“I'm not joking with you, Rafayel. Get the jellyfish lamp!”

“Are you sure?” He reposed the question with great seriousness. “This jellyfish is so ugly and painful to look at that my eyes automatically ignore it.”

You puffed your cheeks and said each word clearly: “Take. That. Jellyfish. Lamp!"

"Okay." Rafayel gave a shrug. At last, his hand found the precise object you wanted. He lifted it. But instead of placing it in your eagerly outstretched palms, he put it on a higher shelf.

“Rafayel!” YYou yelled out of rage. He grinned from ear to ear.

“Here, you told me to take it, so I took it. You didn't mention that I had to give it to you"

“You!… Argghhh!…”

You were so furious that you failed to speak. You stood on your tiptoes and jumped up, trying to grab the item, but Rafayel raised the object entirely.

“Give it to me! Give it to me!” You danced in a circle around Rafayel, who was clutching the jellyfish lamp like a trophy. All eyes in the store turned to both of you. You stopped. Your face was red, both from anger and embarrassment.

You looked at Rafayel, who was teasing you with that handsome but punchable face. Then, like a light bulb had just turned on in your head, you thought of a way to "repress" him.

Your hands stretched out. Rafayel thought you were aiming for the lamp so he raised it even higher. But it was his collar you were after. He wasn't on guard so you pulled him down so easily, so close. Until your lips touch his delicate ones.

Rafayel rolled his eyes. He was so surprised. Taking advantage of the situation when his arm was gradually falling, you immediately grabbed the jellyfish lamp and stepped back, holding it triumphantly in your arms.

“Ha! I snatched it from you!”

Rafayel was in disbelief. He had earlobes the color of ripe tomatoes. With one hand softly brushing his lips, he turned to face you.

“You… cheated.” He said, "In that case, you can snatch me too!"

𝑪𝒂𝒍𝒆𝒃

It had been a long time since both Caleb and you had a chance to go home to visit Grandma. A family meal was inevitable. He took you to the supermarket near your house to shop and prepare dinner.

Caleb knew too much about your taste. You simply followed him and let him select nearly everything. But when you were walking by the snack shelves, your gaze unintentionally paused at the top row, where there was a particular kind of cookie that you and Caleb used to enjoy together as children.

After noticing your halt, Caleb turned to face you.

“Oh, they still sell this?” He spoke up.

“I want to buy it!” You told him. One hand reached up but you couldn't get the snacks. You heard Caleb laughing hysterically next to you. You folded your arms and pouted: "What are you laughing at?" Why don't you get it for me?"

"I assumed you could handle anything on your own since you're already an adult." Caleb made a joke. “Remember when we were kids? Every time you couldn't reach something, you ran to me and tugged my arm?”

You reminisced about your childhood days. Whenever you needed to get something from a high place, the first person you called was Caleb. He would bend down so you could climb on his shoulders and then carry you like that until you got what you wanted.

“Yeah. I remember." You replied. “But why— Ouch!”

Caleb suddenly bent down, wrapped his muscular arms around your thighs and lifted you up.

“Caleb?! What are you doing?!" Your arms wrapped around Caleb's neck, holding on tight as if your life depended on this. You looked down at Caleb's grinning face. He responded:

“I'm helping you get your cookies.”

“N-Not like this!…” You blushed. You had grown up and no longer the innocent little girl you used to be. Being lifted up by him like this made you extremely timid. “People… People are looking at us…”

“Ignore them.” Caleb paid no attention to his surroundings. “Just look at me.”

You felt the heat radiating from your cheeks. Caleb didn't stop there, he asked you:

"Ready?"

"Huh?"

Without waiting for your response, he spun around so fast in that posture, which made you scream suddenly. You leaned entirely on Caleb, counting on him to keep you both balanced. He continued to rotate a few more times, before becoming lightheaded himself. Then he came to a complete halt and rested his back against the shelf.

You both burst into laughter. Laughing until your stomach muscles start to hurt. But Caleb still didn't let you go. He breathed heavily and said:

“I just remembered. Besides helping you get things from high places, I also helped you climb that wall when you snuck out without Gran knowing!"

“It was completely your idea!” You pinched his nose. “After that, both of us got grounded by Grandma.”

"Sorry." Caleb chuckled. “Shall I make it up to you with cookies?”

“Then help me up a little higher.” You uttered it out with joy. “Let's buy all the cookies here!”

[xetlynn]

Twilight Imagines- Benjamin

First Sight

[Masterlist]

Requested by: @twilightlover2007

Summary: in where the Cullens are getting multiple covens together to help them convince the Volturi that Renesmee is not a danger Benjamin spots [Name] and is immediately enamored by her. Even with her two year old daughter. Also finding out they have similar abilities.

I sit in the living room with Bella and Edward as we watch Renesmee play with Athaliah. I cross my arms, holding myself. "How do you feel?" Edward asks me suddenly and I turn to him. "Read my mind." I roll my eyes, he scoffs out a laugh. "I'm asking so you can let it out."

He responds, I look back to the girls. "Yeah, we haven't talked much since you found out about her." Bella chimes into the conversation. I frown for a second.

"It's a weird situation, I don't really know how I feel." I tell them in all honesty. One second Renesmee was a newborn and seconds later she was months old and now she's physically 4 years old.

"I just wish we didn't have to deal with the Volturi. Once again." I hold my head in my hands. Last time we dealt with them was when I turned into a vampire, Athatliah was only 16 months old. They were worried that I would turn Athaliah.

We had to convince them I wouldn't go near her until I had control over my thirst and she wouldn't know anything about us until she was the age of turning or if anything I would fake my death and she'd never see us again. It's something I don't even want to consider. It's something I have 16 years until I have to truly think about. The Volturi believed us when Aro looked into Edward's mind along with mine. Also with the fact that my ability was strong, I would put up a fight. They didn't need any of their men dead.

"I wish that woman just talked to us before running straight to the Volturi. She's also going to get killed." I lift my head back up. Renesmee takes Athaliah over to us and they both smile. I pick up my daughter, placing her on my lap. Edward doing the same with his daughter.

"All right, lovely, it's time for a nap." I stand up. "I'll meet you guys outside." I tell my two best friends before walking upstairs. They have a crib that was originally for Renesmee in Edward's old room. I place Athaliah down. I could tell she was tired so when she started crying I knew it was only for a few minutes.

The first year of her life I cried almost every time she cried. I couldn't handle it. My mom was a huge help since Athaliah's dad left in the beginning of my pregnancy. His parents moved to a whole different state so he didn't have to be a father to our baby. I grieved the relationship in the beginning. I don't really care anymore.

Bella was the only friend I've had ever since giving birth. Other people judged right away. Not Bella. She sometimes would babysit for me if I had to work and no daycare. My mom would pay her as well. Edward then started to help with her. Then he bonded with Athaliah as well. They both became an aunt and uncle to my daughter. I am forever grateful for them.

When her cries stop I snap out of my thoughts. Quietly slipping out of the room. I go downstairs and join everyone outside. Bella and Edward showing the new vampires renesmee's gift. I look off into the distance to see Carlisle and Esme coming our way with three new people. They're from the Egyptian Coven, they drink human blood. I lock eyes with the younger looking man. His eyes were a dark red. They felt entrancing. I couldn't look away. That was until Rosalie comes up to me.

"Could you help me with something?" She asks in a quiet tone, I furrow my eyebrows but nod my head. Following after her. Feeling eyes watch me the entire time. The blonde leads me back into the house where Zafrina, Kachiri, and Senna were standing in our way. "These ladies are from the Amazon coven. They wanted to meet you." Rosalie speaks softly, I place a hand on my chest, confused on why they would want to speak to me. "They've heard of your ability." Emmett tells me, I let out a little 'oh' standing straighter.

"Zafrina likes meeting people similar to her. Having incredible gifts." Kachiri informs me. "What's your gift?" I tilt my head, intrigued. The quiet woman smiles slightly, staring at me. Focusing on something and then suddenly I'm not in the house anymore. I'm back outside. But not our outside. A different place. A place I've never seen before. It was gorgeous.

Then I'm back in the house and I stare at her with wide eyes. "That... was amazing." I tell her, utterly in shock. She grins back to me. "We'd like to see your ability." Kachiri says, I make a face, turning to Rosalie and Emmett who nod their heads for me to do it. "We'd uh, we would have to go outside." I lead the way outside, in front of the porch. The three from the Amazon Coven stand on the porch with Rosalie, Emmett was standing in the door frame.

I smile to them as the cloud above us gets darker than earlier. Their expressions are confused until I bring my arms in the air and it starts raining. It was sprinkling at first then thunder struck. I felt the others crowd around me. I then make it storm. Everyone getting soaked. And then suddenly it stops as I stop focusing on the sky. I take a deep breath. The others begin to clap.

"That's just a tiny bit of what she can do." Emmett roars out, I nod my head sheepishly. "How did you find that out?" One of the Denali sisters ask me. "When I turned, the pain caused a storm. The wind was strong. The weather was insane that night. Later on when I wasn't paying attention and every time I had a huge emotion, a storm began every time. It's a lot easier to control now." I smile as I then make it begin to snow. Renesmee runs up to me with a huge smile. I pick her up so she can play with the snowflakes.

"This is a powerful ability... The Volturi would have no chance against us." Garrett laughs beside Kate who has a tiny smirk on her face. "You could deflect my electricity and make it more powerful." She tells me, lifting one of her hands to show me the electricity coming out of it.

Then everyone begins to talk to one another about it. I place Renesmee down, she holds my hand though instead of running off. I listen outside of the others to see if Athaliah has woken up but her breathing is still slowed. I can tell she's about to wake up. Her naps aren't very long lately.

A person walks up to me, startling me. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you." It was the younger looking man from the Egyptian Coven. I wave a hand. "It's alright, I was trying to make sure my daughter was still sleeping." I sigh out, looking down to my niece who was staring up at the man.

"Your daughter?" He asks, looking around. "Her name's Athaliah." I tell him, we begin to walk inside the house, Renesmee sticking by my side because I think she knows we're going to see my girl. "Beautiful name." He compliments, I quietly thank him. His looks are entrancing I can barely focus on what is being said.

It goes silent between us until Renesmee speaks up in a small sweet tone. "He can make tornados, smaller than yours though." I smile down at her. "Really?"

I've only created a tornado once and right as it formed we made it disappear. That was before Renesmee was born though. Of course Emmett told her about it though. "Our gifts are incredibly similar." He tells me. Before he can say anything else though I hear my daughter begin to stir. Her tiny whines sounding out to down here. "Oh, I have to go, I'll be back." I step up the first couple of steps. He stands there, I can tell her wishes to say something though.

Renesmee was already running to the bedroom though. "What's your name?" I ask him.

"Benjamin." He says. I smile. "Beautiful name." I then head up the stairs.

Renesmee is playing with Athaliah through the bars of the crib. I smile, heading over to them and picking up my daughter. "Let's go play downstairs." Renesmee says, taking my hand once again and dragging me back down. Benjamin was still standing there just as he was before I left.

I was glad to be honest. I was hoping he waited for me. "This is Athaliah, Athaliah, meet Benjamin." I bounce her on my hip, pointing to the beautiful man. She tiredly looks to him.

Then suddenly doing grabby hands at him for him to take her. I furrow my eyebrows. It usually takes her a minute to get used to new people. He sticks his hand out, letting her grab onto it. It wasn't enough though she lunges her body forward so he could take her out of my arms. I laugh. "Sorry, you don't have to-"

"I don't mind as long as you don't." He puts his hands out and I shrug my shoulders, handing her over to him. Renesmee watches, a little bit annoyed until Edward comes in and tells her to go with him somewhere. I watch as my daughter puts his face into her hands. I then wondered if that was a good idea looking at his eyes which were red. Meaning he eats humans.

I bit my lip. He looks over to me and I think he can sense my worry. He gives me a short smile and places Athaliah down. She walks back to me, hugging my legs. She's still waking up.

Later in the night Bella and I were getting the girls to sleep. Athaliah sprawled out, her arm going over Renesmee's torso. She's holding onto her hand. I look up to see Bella looking at someone. I trace where. It was Benjamin who was sitting beside Jacob. He was staring at me though. "He seems enamored by you." She whispers, careful not to wake the kids. I snort out a laugh. "Yeah, okay. He wants a single mom." I joke, rolling my eyes.

"I mean the whole time he's been here he's been staring at you. He keeps trying to talk with you and he's brought you up to us every chance he gets. Asking about your ability." She informs me and I give her a look. "Yeah, he's interested in my ability. Not me." I sit up straight, crossing my legs.

"You're so oblivious, [Name]." She comments, sitting up as well. We eventually get up listening to Vladimir and Stefan talk about how they despise the Volturi and why. They were characters, that was for sure.

I sit down by the fire, a log was already there but no one else was there. They all went to different areas of the woods. I stared at the flames wondering how tomorrow was going to go. Someone sat beside me but neither of us spoke. I didn't even move my head to see.

"[Name]." The person speaks up after moments of silence. I hum out in response. "I uh I've never been left this speechless before. I don't know what to say around you." It was Benjamin, I smile to myself before turning to face him. "I'm boring, I apologize." I say, now just observing his features and I wonder what he was like as a human. If he was always this perfect.

"No, you're not at all. You make me nervous. It's a feeling I don't think I've ever experienced." His eyes lock with mine and I badly want to look away. But I can't. I'm stuck in place. "When did you turn?" I slightly change the subject. "1815." My eyes widen to his answer. He begins to laugh at my reaction. "Sorry, that was rude." I rub my hands together, finally looking away due to embarrassment.

"I expected it, when did you turn?"

"Last year."

"A newborn practically and you're that in control of your ability?" He seemed to be surprised.

"I couldn't control my ability completely until maybe six years after turning." He then ignites fire from his pointer finger. "You control the elements?" I ask in amazement. "And you control the weather." He states.

"Our abilities are incredibly similar." I laugh, excited. Watching the flames on his finger tip before he closes his fist and it goes away.

For hours we talk about our abilities, about his life before turning. I do the same. Telling him a bit about Athaliah. It never felt like a bad subject bringing her up like it usually does with men.

He actually asks about her and that's where I feel he doesn't want to be with me but to be friends.

"Your daughter truly has your looks." We both look to my sleeping daughter who is still sprawled out. I smile. "Thank you. She's my everything." I tell him.

"I can tell."

"I'm interested in getting to know you more." Benjamin says, this time he cautiously takes my hand into his. Making sure I was okay with it before gripping a little tighter. "What do you want to know?" I nervously ask.

"No, I mean courting you. You being mine, me being yours." He explains, I scrunch my nose before saying. "it might be forward, I know this. But you, seeing you, talking to you today. It only makes me want to be yours more."

"What about Athaliah, she comes with, we're a package deal. I'm a single mother. She's human, you eat off... humans." I take my hand back, now giving him a serious expression. It feels crazy but I feel the same way. I feel so strongly for him and I can't lose it but I also have to put my child first.

"I'll love her as my own. I'll eat animals for you both. I'll learn." He assures me, I pause for a moment.

"This feels crazy." I laugh out. "But I'll give it a try. I'm interested in getting to know you more." Even though we don't know what's going to happen tomorrow I don't care. I deserve to be happy even for a little bit.

——————

I almost deleted this whole thing after finishing it.

Heart was racing. Almost cried.

If you want to request anything lmk!

[princesssarahblog]

bad habits - series - part 1

boyfriend!jj maybank x girlfriend!fem!reader

jj is your sweet boyfriend, but he has bad habits that lead you both to quarrels and misunderstandings

warnin: angst (happy ending) the reader is jealous of jj to kiara, a bit of a nervous reader, short!reader and wears high heels (sorry), smoking, drinking alcohol, quarrels and misunderstandings, shouting, separation for a while and then reunion

author notes: I don't know english very well, so I use a translator. I always write everything with a small letter and a small font because I feel comfortable that way

It was night. you was in your room at home. you was taking care of your feet, applying creams and ointments and then covering them with a plasters. you does this almost every night because you always wears heels because of your short stature. your window was open, you wasn't expecting anyone. but someone will definitely arrive

when you finished caring for your feet, you grabbed a book and decided to read it while sitting on the windowsill. you didn't want to sleep yet

a few minutes later, jj was walking down the streets, making his way towards your house. his hand was stuffed with cigarettes, hoping this would be the night he could finally talk to you after the last few days, he had been trying and trying to approach you but you had been very distant. a sigh came from his lips as he lit a cigarette, he could probably sneak into your room through the window. he stood outside the window, looking in, hoping you would notice him

turning his head to the right, he saw you herself. you was reading a book on the windowsill, he decided to scare you by grabbing your fragile shoulders and pressing you to himself.

you opened your eyes and looked at him in shock

"jj! you-"

but, you are shut up and a soft kiss is left on your lips, causing you to blush a little.

"hello to you too, baby" - the blond boy said with that beautiful smile that you love so much.

"ugh, you smoked.." you said with disgust, turning away to get some fresh air. you hates it when he smokes or drinks weed or alcohol, you was worried about his health.. especially since he comes home beaten up every day, because either kooks or his father do it

he sat next to you on the windowsill and placed his head on your shoulder. but you pulled away when he leaned in. this made him sigh. It was hard to talk to you lately cause you always had a bad reaction. "sorry" he mumbled

jj really didn't want to bother you, but since he was now so close to you, he could see the plasters on your feet and the scars that were starting to form. he felt really worried about you. because he knew how bad you would get when you was stressed out. "are you okay?" he asked cautiously.

"now yes" you suddenly grabbed a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and threw them out the window.

now you was happy, you knew that it was hard for him to buy cigarettes and that made you happy. you didn't want your boyfriend's health to get worse

jj's eyebrows furrowed as you threw his cigarettes out the window, causing him to sigh. he really needed them right now to calm his nerves, "hey! I needed those!" he complained.

"agh, you smoked weed with kiara again?" - you frowned when you smelled the weed on him. you were friends with kiara of course, but.. sometimes she got on your nerves.

「you was honestly jealous of jj for her」

this made jj look away from you. he didn't want to admit that part because he knew you'd freak out again.

"so what if I did?" he mumbled under his breath while getting a good look at her. he could see in your eyes you was jealous.

"you know, then you better go away. go back to kiara, to anyone. smoke, drink, do whatever the hell you want! i'm tired of this!"

you raised your voice, and distanced yourself from him again.

「you needed time」

jj's eyes widened when you raised your voice and got up. this is exactly what he tried to avoid, fighting with you. but every time, he somehow managed to do it.

"no, no, don't be like that.. please" he mumbled and grabbed your wrist so that you couldn't run off. he had difficulty saying words like "please" and his mischievous and cheerful character had completely disappeared.

"I'm sorry.. I.. I, we need time. I think.. it's best for us. please, you need to go." you softened and your gaze became more gentle, you looked up at jj with that warm and gentle look you always had on him. you raised your hand slightly, gesturing with it.

jj's gaze was heavy, he looked at you with seriousness on his face. when he is serious, he can seem scary. but, he will never hurt you. he nodded and left through the window, giving you one last look and disappeared into the night.

「you need time」

[smooth-operator-55]

Carlos with dialogues n°2 situations n°10 and places n°4 pls 🙏🙏🙏🙏

Say my name | CS55

In which you accidentally moan an ex's name while being intimate with fwb!Carlos, in his car.

Warnings: friends with benefits, smut, piv (protected), tiniest bit of angst if you squint (but not really), english not being my first language

Word count: 2,6k

A/N: Thank you for the patience, other one-shots will be posted shortly as well! Hope you like it :)

The night flowed easily, just like the drinks in the club you were at with your friends. A night out was much needed by everyone, just being together and having fun. It was getting quite late, which was visible on some of the small group you were out with. After multiple glasses of shots, cocktails and beers being downed by everyone, some could still dance but some were already half asleep in the booth.

You were on the verge of the latter when you felt a hand on your shoulder, making you jump a tad. Looking up, you saw Carlos standing over you. His lips moved but his voice blended in perfectly with the loud music and bass vibrating through the walls and your lungs – though your tipsy state didn't help either.

Carlos bent down and his warm hand immediately wrapped around your wrist gently. He repeated himself with his lips right next to your ear.

"Come dance with me!"

Feeling the effect of the night and the drinks you'd had, you thought it was better not to, even if you wanted to. When he saw you shaking your head, Carlos just stared nodding his as he tried to pull you to stand, making you shake yours even more.

"Do you feel sick?" His lips traced the shell of your ear once again. You shook your head again in response.

"I'm tired." You shouted over the music.

He sat down next to you, his side right up against you without any space left between your bodies.

"Do you want to go home?" His eyes scanned your face for any signs of discomfort, letting them linger on your lips for just a little too long.

You shrugged your shoulders in indecisiveness. You were hoping that you would come alive in a few minutes, that the tiredness would only last a little more. It's been long since you had the chance to go out with your friends and you didn't want to leave just yet.

"I just wish I wasn't tired." You leaned closer to him as he dipped his head in your direction so he could actually hear you.

As soon as he heard your words, an idea came to his mind, making a playful, teasing smirk show on his face. He was actually hoping he could get you alone sometime very soon, after watching you dance on the dancefloor. In his eyes every move of yours seemed sinful.

Feeling like this was his chance, he grabbed your hand and nodded with his head towards the back exit. You stood as he pulled your hand and started following him outside, closely behind him. The warm summer air hit you when you stepped outside, the oxygen already starting to make you feel more awake.

"Where are we going, Carlos?" You asked him when you reached his car in the parking lot. "You drank. You can't drive."

"Who said anything about driving, hermosa?" He raised his eyebrows as he reached into his pocket for his keys, unlocking the doors of his Alfa Romeo.

"Carlos..." You suddenly realised where his head was at, making your eyes widen in disbelief.

"Hm?" He opened the door and grinned when he saw your reaction. "It's not like we haven't done it before in a car."

When he saw indecisiveness taking over you again, he let go of the door handle and stepped closer to you, grabbing your face on both sides.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, it's just so...random."

"Random?"

"I didn't think this would be your solution."

"Do you want to? It's okay if not."

"I didn't say that."

"Then get in the car before someone sees us out here."

You quickly climbed in the back with him following behind you and shutting the door.

He reached for you right away and in a second his lips were already on yours. One of his hands cupped your cheek, while the other laid on your thigh, stroking it slowly and gripping it lightly. Your hands ended up in his soft, thick hair – out of habit by this point. When his tongue was about to enter your mouth, you broke the kiss.

"What if the others start looking for us?"

"Then they'll be looking for us." He leaned in, only for you to interrupt him again.

"I'm serious, Carlos."

"Good, me too." He breathed, but continued when he'd seen the unsatisfied look on your face. "I don't think they'll look for us. They're too drunk to notice we're not there anyway."

"But what if they find us? It's risky."

"It only makes it more fun, if you ask me." He whispered and leaned in again to press kisses onto the hot skin of your neck. "Plus...we're adults...and...we can do..." he said between kisses before he looked at your face and gave your lips a quick peck, "whatever we want to do."

"Okay, but be quick." You gave in to him.

His lips were on yours again in no second as his hands grabbed your hips and pulled you into his lap. Obeying your wish, he sped things up a tad. His fingers wandered under the fabric of you dress and started to tease you through your underwear. He softly caressed you through the thin fabric, knowing the effect this had on you.

Your hands wandered from his hair to his stubble-covered face and neck. The feeling of his fingers against you made you sigh. Trying to increase the feeling, you started moving your hips against his hand and the rough material of his jeans, easily being able to feel his hardness through them. Your actions made him groan deeply, his hand now resting on your butt.

Your fingers soon started working on his belt and the button and zipper of his jeans.

This time it was him who broke the kiss. He slightly raised his hips, trying to slide his trousers further down, along with his underwear. You quickly turned around to open the centre console box, reaching for a silver package. He took it from your hand, ripped it open with his teeth and rolled it down on himself with a quick movement. He lifted his gaze to your face as he looked for any signs to stop, your eyes meeting before a quick kiss.

His finger slid your panties to the side as you lifted your hips and took him in your hand to guide him. You tapped him against your clit and grinded on him to really work him up as much as you could. He threw his head back against the headrest as a heavy moan fell from his lips.

"Hermosa, por favor."

You lined him up with yourself and slid down on him slowly, letting yourself adjust to him, moans echoing around in the small space. He leaned in to kiss you again, his tongue entering your mouth. As you started moving up and down, sighs, heavy breaths, groans and moans became more frequent. His hands wandered from your cheeks to your hips, down to your ass, a firm grip on it. You tried to pick up the pace, but it wasn't too long 'til your thighs started to get tired. Carlos sensed your struggle, so he started moving his hips as well, thrusting up into you. You broke the kiss as a mixture of a whimper and a moan fell from your lips when you felt his movements first. His hands that were resting on your ass also tried to help you with the burning sensation in your thighs, as he helped you move up and down.

You got so lost in the way he completely took control in just a matter of seconds, you could already feel your climax getting closer and closer. The scent of him mixing with sweat filled your nose as the windows started fogging up. His hips moved just the right way, especially when he placed his hand on your back and pushed you into his chest, thursting into you at a new angle, constantly hitting your sweet spot. Your face was buried in the crook of his neck and you could barely stop moaning. The new angle made you lose your mind. The alcohol in your system didn't help either, so when an unexpected moan – or more like an unexpected name – sounded from your lips, you surprised yourself. Especially the man underneath you.

"What?" His hips stopped nearly immediately as he breathed heavily.

You lifted your head to look at him when you felt him stop, your brain barely being able to function and catch up with the last few seconds.

"What?" You breathed heavily as well, as you realised what you just said – the burning sensation not in your thighs anymore, but more like in your face, from the embarrassment.

"What did you say?"

"I didn't say anything."

"Why did you say his name?" Confusion sat on his face.

"I...I didn't. I said Carlos." You denied it, trying to convince rather yourself than him.

"No, you didn't."

"Yes, I did!" You looked at him, his expression giving away the fact that he heard you loud and clear. "Look, it just slipped out, I'm sorry."

He just sighed, not knowing how to react exactly.

A few moments of sitting in silence had passed before you slowly and carefully started caressing his lower arms and leaned in to place soft pecks on his neck, trying to reignite the mood. He remained still. You looked back up at him, a moody expression sitting on his face.

"I'm sorry, Carlos."

"Why did you say his name?" He asked again.

"It's nothing...it must've been because he texted me last week and we've been talking lately."

"Again? Do you remember what happened last time?"

"Yes, I do and I don't need a lecture. As you said, I'm an adult and I can do whatever I want."

"I'm just saying. It didn't end well last time and I don't want to see you like that again."

"We're not even back together!" You raised your voice a tad in frustration. "Nothing is going to happen. Now, can I move?"

"You're thinking about another man while I'm balls deep inside you. You can't really expect me to be okay with that."

"I mean, it's just sex. So why would you ever be jealous?"

"I'm not jealous, but this wouldn't boost any man's ego."

"I didn't mean to say his name, I promise. Just please, let me move."

His grip on your hips that held you from moving loosened after a few seconds, making you lift them slowly, before sinking back down. You couldn't help but gasp at the feeling, still sensitive. The look on Carlos' face didn't really change; he was determined not to let it. He didn't make a single noise as you moved your hips, his hands didn't wander over your body either.

"You really gonna give me the silent treatment?" You slowed down again, keeping the movement minimal on his lap. Your hands sneaked under his shirt, stroking his abs before you decided to undo the buttons. After the first three buttons were undone, you pressed open-mouthed kisses on his smooth, hot chest. Your fingers moved further down until there were no buttons left.

"What can I do to make you forget that, guapo?" Your lips reached his neck.

Before you could even blink you were already laying on your back on the leather seats with Carlos between your legs, possessiveness getting the best of him.

"Block him. And never talk to him again."

His hands gripped your waist to keep you in place as he started moving his hips. Your leg that was up against the headrests was suddenly laying on his shoulder, occasionally meeting the roof of his car. His lips came close to yours, giving you the impression of wanting to kiss you, only for him to pull away when you leaned in. He kept playing this game of back and forth, before moving down to your neck, his punishment for you is not letting you kiss him.

Your hands were gripping his strong forearms, the muscles hard beneath your fingers. The delicious angle had you moaning and whimpering under him, whilst he still wasn't being as vocal as he usually would be. It took you suddenly clenching around him for him to release a deep moan, startling him and making his rhythm irregular for a moment.

"Stop that."

"Stop what?" You looked at him with innocent eyes, right as you did it again.

"I won't say it again." He snapped his hips against yours harder, making you ride up on the seats. You gasped at his action, as you felt your climax building.

"Tell me who's making you feel this good, bontia?"

"You, papi."

"Who?"

"You, Carlos!" You said when you realised what he meant.

"Say it again." He picked up the pace.

His name fell from your lips repeatedly like a prayer as you were about to fall apart. You could tell he was getting close as well, judging by his grunts, heavy moans and his rapid pace.

"Carlos-" You squeezed out to let him know what he already knew. His hand started toying with your clit, making you lose your mind immediately. You came around him with a loud moan, nails leaving red lines and marks on his arms as your back arched into him. The feel of your constant clenching around his cock was more than enough for him; he buried his head in the crook of your neck as he came, a deep moan falling from his lips. His grip on your waist and thigh loosened after a few seconds as he slowed down, eventually stopping his movements and sliding your leg down from his shoulder.

He laid on top of you for a little as you both tried to catch your breaths, your fingers playing with his hair.

"We should go back inside." You whispered after a few minutes, when your heart rate was finally back at its natural pace.

Carlos lifted himself from you and pulled out gently. He adjusted your panties and lightly slapped your sensitive clit, making you gasp at the feeling. A smug smirk sat on his face as he took off the used condom, wrapped it in a tissue and tossed it on the floor of his car at the driver's seat. You quickly pulled your dress back down while he pulled up his underwear and buttoned his jeans. He was fidgeting with his belt when he spoke.

"I meant it when I told you to block him. He's not good for you."

"We just talked. That doesn't mean anything."

"It doesn't mean anything now, but it will later. Either you block him or this was our last time. I'm not watching you getting your heart broken by him again."

Seeing the serious look on his face, you took your phone from your bag that had fallen onto the floor and did as Carlos had asked.

"There you go. Happy?"

"Sí." He looked into your eyes as he was buttoning his shirt. "You deserve much better than that dickhead."

"You missed the first button." Your eyes traced over his shirt.

"Mierda." He muttered as he started unbuttoning what he had just buttoned. You watched the entire process – quite entertained – but stopped him when he was about to start over, grabbing the wrong button again.

"No, let me." Your fingers started working as you felt his eyes staring. "I'm sorry again."

"It happens, I guess." He shrugged his shoulders.

"Still, I'm sorry. It won't happen again...I don't even understand how it did, honestly. You're much better than he could ever be." You whispered and leaned in to kiss him.

"Yeah?" He murmured into the kiss.

"Mhmm."

"Good." His hands cupped your cheeks as the kiss deepened. Your hand got lost in his hair way too easily again, tugging on it softly in the heat of the moment, which earned a moan from him. "Mmm, Isa."

You broke the kiss and swatted his arm when you realised what he was doing, making him chuckle.

"Stop it."

"I'm just kidding, hermosa. Let's go back inside before they really start looking for us."

[unclewaynemunson]

Pt2 of the badly kept secrets of Eddie's heart monitor

After the first two weeks, Steve seems to have suddenly decided to stop visiting Eddie. No explanation, no goodbye: one day he's there, and then he... Isn't. It takes a few days, sometimes, Steve has a life of his own after all, but a whole week goes by with nothing. And another one. Eddie only knows he's alive – and in town – because the others told him when he asked. Maybe Steve's gotten tired of being surrounded by all that hospital sterility. Or maybe he's gotten tired of being around Eddie. Or maybe... Eddie groans and takes up a stare-down with the fucking heart monitor that's still attached to him at all times, his biggest enemy.

Unfortunately, he has way too much time on his hands, alone in this room and unable to do anything but lie in bed and stare at the ceiling. It makes it far too easy to let his thoughts spiral. Maybe – no, probably, certainly, undoubtedly – that goddamn heart monitor was the ideal help for Steve to decipher Eddie's biggest secret without any difficulties.

Yes, that must be the reason why Steve is staying away. Sure, the guy could tolerate being around “the freak” for a few hours a week out of pity, but of course he wouldn't want anything to do with him anymore upon finding out exactly what kind of freaky thoughts he really has about Steve. Steve was polite enough to pretend like he didn't notice the heart monitor speeding up every single time he got in Eddie's proximity, but of course, of course he noticed. He noticed and now he hates Eddie.

And honestly? He has every right to hate Eddie, with the way Eddie has been exploiting every opportunity to get Steve to touch him. Even though he'd regret it right away whenever the heart monitor couldn't shut the fuck up, Eddie never learned from his mistakes. He was even stupid enough to find meaning in the way Steve's touch would linger after helping him lie down or sit up, stupid enough to find tenderness in the way Steve held his arms when helping him out of his bed and to the bathroom. Obviously, Steve never wanted any of that. Obviously, that only made Steve uncomfortable, but the poor guy was too polite to lash out to the dude chained to a hospital bed healing from having all his organs chewed inside out.

Eddie sighs and closes his eyes; not because he wants to sleep, but because the staring contest with the heart monitor isn't really getting him anywhere. Maybe it's for the best that Steve is staying away. That way, Eddie might be able to get over him more easily. He doesn't deserve Steve's friendship anyway.

***

“I wanna visit Eddie today.”

“Alright, have fun,” Steve answers. “Tell him I said hi.”

Robin sighs dramatically. “No, dingus, you're coming with me. I need a ride.”

“No!” It comes out of his mouth a little too quick, a little too loud, and Robin raises her eyebrows at him.

“No, I can't,” he explains in a calmer voice.

Robin raises her eyebrows even further, making them disappear beneath her bangs altogether. “You literally just told me you don't have plans after work.”

“Yeah, but...” He lets his voice fade out and settles on muttering something incomprehensible.

“I did not understand one single word of what you were saying,” Robin points out. She sounds annoyed, but there's a vaguely amused smile playing around her lips, betraying how she really feels about the whole thing. “Seriously, what's up with you and Eddie? Did you have a fight or something?”

“No...”

“Until two weeks ago, you were at the hospital basically every spare minute of your time. You even canceled two dates just so you could spend more time with Eddie! And now, all of a sudden, you'd rather spend your evening on your own at home watching TV than visit your friend?”

“He's not my friend,” Steve protests.

She gives him a punch against his shoulder.

“Okay, I'm pretty sure he hates me, Rob.” Steve finally caves in. “He gets, like, very uncomfortable whenever I'm around. And I don't wanna add to his discomfort any more than necessary, so it's better I stay away from him.”

“Well, I don't know what on earth gave you that idea, but that is by far the biggest load of bullcrap I heard all week,” Robin says matter-of-factly. “He's asked about you every single time I visited him. He'll be happy to see you, dingus, you're coming with me today. No excuses.”

***

Like clockwork, the steady beeping of the heart monitor falters as soon as Eddie locks eyes with Steve. To make things even worse, what little color that is on Eddie's cheeks leaves his face immediately.

Despite the paleness of Eddie's face, Steve can't help but notice how good he looks in comparison to when he last saw him two weeks ago. He's sitting straight up, leaning against a pillow, and the look in his eyes is far from drowsy.

“S-Steve,” Eddie stutters out. “Hi.” He clears his throat. “And – and Robin, of course, hi! Good to see ya, Buck.” He stretches out his arms to embrace her, and Steve awkwardly comes up behind her. It feels weird not to follow Robin's example and give him a hug, but when he bows over the bed and wraps his arms around Eddie, the beeping immediately picks up speed again. To make things even worse, Eddie quite literally recoils from his touch, leaning away as far as possible and letting his arms hover in the air around Steve more than actually hugging him back.

When Steve looks at Robin, he notices that her eyes have grown about twice their normal size while they flash back and forth between Eddie, the machines around his bed, and Steve.

He locks eyes with her and tries to silently convey a See, I told you so about Eddie resenting him. She answers with a barely visible nod and relief fills Steve's chest. He's lucky to have Robin right by his side, his best friend, the one person he can always count on understanding him. She'll get them out of here in no time and leave Eddie in peace and –

“Oh shoot, sorry, I forgot I need to get a, um, a thing from the car,” Robin says. “I'll be right back.”

As she stumbles out of the room, Steve wants to scream at her that that was very much the opposite of what he wanted her to do, but she disappears before he can do anything about it, only leaving an awkward silence in her wake. So Steve has no choice but to turn back to Eddie and take his familiar place in the chair beside his bed.

“I kinda didn't expect to see you anymore.” Eddie is the one to break the silence. He sounds more distant than the last time Steve saw him. It must be worse than Steve thought: Eddie had been happy to be rid of him and now here he is again, after a meager two weeks of peace.

“Sorry,” Steve mumbles. “She insisted I come with her.”

“So you didn't wanna come?”

Steve chuckles darkly at the irony in that question, not really knowing how to answer that.

“Alright, I'm just gonna say it,” says Eddie when it becomes clear that Steve doesn't quite know what to say. “You figured out what I – how I felt about you, didn't you? Cause of the heart thing.”

Steve looks away, stares intently at the ugly dark blue linoleum carpet under his feet.

“Yeah,” he quietly confesses. There's no use denying it now, he figures.

Eddie heaves out a long sigh.

“For what it's worth: I'm really sorry, Steve, I didn't mean to make you-”

“It's fine,” Steve quickly interrupts him. He doesn't think he could bear Eddie's pity right now. “Don't worry about it. I just wanted to give you some space, y'know, get outta your hair for a bit. I didn't want to make this any more painful for you than it has to be.”

“Really?”

The heart monitor stutters again and Eddie's voice sounds weirdly strained. Steve can't help but look up. He's met with big brown eyes that are looking at him like Eddie actually cares about him. For a moment, Steve imagines to see tears, but then Eddie blinks and the illusion is gone.

“I um... I appreciate that, man,” Eddie says.

Another awkward silence dawns over the room.

“Wait,” Eddie says after a few seconds. “So you're not angry?”

“No!” Steve immediately replies – and it's true. He understands why Eddie doesn't like being around him, that too much has happened in the past for them to just move on and hold hands or some shit.

“It's not your fault,” he tells Eddie. He looks away again, back to the floor in front of his sneakers. “If it's anyone's fault, it's mine, right?”

Eddie huffs out a sound of disbelief. “Why, cause you're just too damn sexy, Harrington?”

Steve frowns. “Well, no, cause I was an asshole and I was mean to your friends during all of high school and it's stupid of me to expect you to just get over that shit and-”

“What the fuck does that have to do with anything?”

There's that stutter in the heart monitor again. It makes Steve wonder if he's putting Eddie's health at risk by simply existing next to him. Maybe it would be better to leave Eddie alone and wait in the car until Robin is done with her visit. What the hell is taking her so long anyway?

He keeps his eyes stubbornly focused on the blue floor. “Isn't that why you got so uncomfortable having me around?” he points out. “Look, I get it, man. I was an asshole, it's true. And it was selfish of me to keep showing up here only because you were too polite to say to my face what you thought about me. I was only thinking about myself and about how much I liked being here with you, it wasn't fair.”

All of a sudden, the soft touch of a hand lands on his shoulder. He hates how that makes his own heart speed up. If he were the one attached to a heart monitor, Eddie would've seen right through him in an instant, that's for sure.

He looks up and meets Eddie's wide-eyed, somewhat shocked face.

“You - you thought you were making me uncomfortable?” Eddie asks him, sounding like he's completely gobsmacked.

Steve frowns. “Isn't that what we've been talking about for the past five minutes?”

“Steve,” Eddie says. “I am so sorry. I didn't – I never – Look. Listen.” He removes his hand from Steve's shoulder and roughly wipes it over his face. His heart monitor accelerates even further. “Please don't hate me for what I'm about to tell you, okay?” He doesn't wait for a reaction, only uses his pause to take a deep breath, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment before opening them again and looking right into Steve's.

“I'm gay, Steve. And that evil computer over there-” He points towards the heart monitor, “-keeps betraying my big, fat, gay crush on you. Every time you walk in here, or read my book to me, or do so much as smile at me, I just – God, I'm such a goner for you and there was no hiding it because of that stupid fucking thing.”

This time, Steve is quite sure he is not at all imagining the tears in Eddie's eyes.

“I thought that's why you stopped visiting. Cause you figured out how gay I am – about you – and you didn't want anything to do with that. With me. Being gay. For you.”

Eddie swallows. He lifts a hand and pulls a strand of hair over his face in a poor attempt to hide the truly terrified expression that's all over his features.

“Jesus, Eddie,” Steve breathes out. He can't even begin to comprehend how spectacularly wrong he has been about everything. It's almost like he's in shock. Only a minute ago, he thought Eddie despised him. And now, he has to process the revelation that the guy in fact has had a crush on him – a “big, fat, gay crush” – all along. That the reason his heart was behaving so weirdly was because Steve's proximity made him lovesick. That he recoiled from Steve's touches out of fear that the monitor would give him away and make Steve realize he was gay and in love with him.

“Please say something?” It sounds like a question, small and so afraid of what is about to come.

“Eddie, I – Jesus. This is... A lot. To process,” Steve manages to choke out.

“I know,” Eddie says. “I'm sorry I made you think I hated you. But... Please don't hate me. I really missed you visiting. We can be friends, right? You won't even have to touch me ever again, we can just hang out like bros, and I'll try to get my feelings for you under control, and you can-”

Steve finally gains control over his body again: he leaps forward and presses his lips against Eddie's with slightly more force than he had meant to do.

A surprised yelp escapes from Eddie's mouth, and the beeping of the heart monitor goes even crazier. It makes Steve's own heart do a goddamn cartwheel, that audible proof of what he is making Eddie feel.

He completely understands why the heart monitor is going batshit crazy right now; everything about this is fucking amazing. One of his hands finds its way to Eddie's surprisingly soft hair, and he revels in the feeling of touching Eddie again and in the taste of Eddie's lips against his own, and maybe he should just climb into Eddie's bed to–

“Thank God for that.”

They quickly jump apart to find Robin standing in the doorway, an annoyingly smug grin on her face.

“You two could really not be more stupid if you tried, huh?”

Steve squints at her while his hand blindly finds Eddie's on top of the sheets and curls itself around it. He feels his cheeks heat up, but he doesn't care. Nothing matters anymore, except for Eddie's hand warmly resting in his own.

“Did you even need anything from the car at all?” he asks Robin, raising an eyebrow at her.

“No, of course not,” Robin scoffs. “Just needed you idiots to finally get your shit together. I don't think I've ever met anyone more dense than the two of you, seriously! There were at least three moments when I almost barged in here to just smash your faces tog-”

“You were eavesdropping on us?!”

“Obviously.”

Steve opens his mouth, indignant and ready to tell her exactly how mean and evil she is, but she merely raises a hand and the look in her eyes is terrifying enough to shut him up before he has even started speaking.

“Hey, listen,” she says. Something in her face softens. “I'm really happy for you guys. Seriously, no matter how stupid you are, you two deserve every bit of happiness in the world.” She takes a step backwards towards the door. “I'll go wait in the car, dingus. Go kiss each other some more.”

And before Steve or Eddie can say anything, she winks and closes the door behind her.

Taglist: @estrellami-1 @swimmingbirdrunningrock @saramelaniemoon @lololol-1234 @carlajim98 @7-starboi @acedorerryn @hallucinatedjosten @goodolefashionedloverboi @zoeweee @resident-gay-bitch @my2amgaythoughts @didntwant2come @steveshairspray @noodle-shenaniganery @thedragonsaunt @finntheehumaneater @queerriotgrrrl @co5m0 @dino-nuggets-posts

[mottysith]

"May you never forget me" First chapter

Song inspired title: May you never forget me by Temachii

Platonic! Dad!burning spice x Teenager!reader

Platonic! All x Teenager!reader (gender neutral)

Summary: You were the offspring of the saviour of change, having to watch how your life was quickly destroyed by the now beasts, you choosed to be different from your father.

Warnings: fluff, eventual angst, mayor character death, no beta read

Sorry for bad english, it isn't my natal language.

Word count: 6,9 k

You were the offspring of the saviour of change, Warming spice cookie.

You adored him with all your heart, since he was the light of your existence. Being baked in his shape by the witches in his request.

You were cooked by one of the most powerful witch, in where she used the finest ingredients for your dough and let it rest for 12 days until finally cooking you in the oven. When you were finally baked, she gave you to warming spice cookie as a baby to be taken care of.

From your earlier years you were very adored by him, being dotted at all hours of the day just for doing the simplest achievement.

You also were a lovely child, helping the cookies around you who were in a rush. Making you receive the praise of them, which you adored and always looked foward to.

From time to time, your father would tell you that you were going to be the Highness of the kingdom one day in the future, which always got you excited. You even made your own carboard crown so you could play to be the ruler with other cookies.

———

You were seated in front of your father, in the wooden table in front of you there were a lot of papers which your dad was reading attentively. You were swinging your legs in boredom, and your child-like curiosity made you wonder.

"What are you doing?" You asked innocently enough, looking awaitingly at your father who was now looking at you.

"I'm just reading reports about how our kingdom is doing my dear" He explained to you steadily.

"Our? Will it be mine someday?" You looked at him.

"Of course my spice, when you get older enough to completely understand my work and I get tired all this kingdom will be yours to reign" He said softly.

You excitedly stated loudly "Im going to be a Monarch!" While getting up from your chair to jump around the room, your father yous laughed to himself as he continued to read the kingdom's report.

———

You always wondered a lot about the things you didn't know as a child, following your dad wherever he went like a little duckling asking all the questions that only a child could have 'why is the sky blue' 'Why do cookies exist' and a lot more, which he always answered with what he knew. Sometimes laughing at the most dumbest ones and other times thinking for a few minutes before giving the best answer he could have thought of.

Warming spice cookie in his free time made you train with him, you didn't really like it but you did so anyway.

———

You were in the training room with your dad, you both were friendly fighting so you could level up your skills, yet something is clear, you were miserably failing.

You fell to the ground for the tenth time now, really exhausted. "Come on my spice" your dad said to you. "You have to keep training so you can become as strong and powerful as I am" You got up from your fall and grabbed the wooden sword once more, holding it towards him.

"I'm ready for another round!" You stated loud and clear.

"That's the spirit!"

———

Sometimes he left you in the hands of other saviour to take care of you, it was never a problem since they adored you and you loved them back.

Sparkling sugar cookie, the virtue of happines, she let you play in her paradise with other cookies around your age. Her personality was sweet like sugar and everytime you felt sad she would sing a song while playing tunes in her harp so you could calm down.

———

You were playing tag with another cookie, while you were running around the big playground in the paradise when you suddenly slipped on a branch, falling to the ground and scrapping your knee.

Your first instic was to cry loudly, which made Sparkling Sugar hurry to your side the second she heard your cries to try to calm you down.

"Don't worry sweetie, is just a rash, nothing serious" her calm words of reassurance didn't stop your sobs. "It hurts" You sobbed, Sparkling sugar seemed panicky then she remembered something "Hey, I just know what will make you feel better my sugar!" She grabbed her harp to start playing with it as she hummed a soothing song.

It was so mesmerizing that you stopped crying just to look at hear her singing, the tunes were hypnoticing and her voice was angelic, sparkling sugar smiled at that.

"Don't worry about that okey? I will take you to the infirmary to get that all patched up so you can feel better and play again" She said calmly to you as she still played the harp, the tunes being hypnoticing. "I would like to" You murmured, your voice still weak from before, yet you didn't feel sad anymore, you felt calm, serene.

———

Blueberry milk cookie, the virtue of knowledge, he was the owner of the spire of truth, where a very big library was always open for the public. He usually just looked over you making sure you didn't do anything dangerous or stupid as he worked around, telling you stories from time to time and showing you the greates books you ever had the fortune of reading.

———

"Another history!! Please?" You asked him with puppy eyes as you, blueberry milk just sighed "okay, just one more" "yay!" You started bouncing from one feet to another as he looked around the library, looking for a certain book to show you while you followed him from behind, your excitement showing trough your movements.

"I just know what you would like" he said, grabbing one of the book placed in one of the highest bookcase shelf.

He sat on the floor, motioning you to sit next to him, Which you did withouth thinking twice.

"Have you wondered about how the story of earthbread began?" He asked you while opening the book, you nodded at his words.

"I supposed, you always have been such a smart and curious cookie, my little genious" He praised you while he looked through the pages, which made you believe that you were even smarter than you actually were for a moment.

"Well, let's see" He said as he adjusted his glasses " The story begins when this very Silver Tree was only a small sapling. When the World of Desserts was at its infancy. The Witches baked five Cookies to help them in their creation of the world.

The five Cookies imbued with absolute powers walked Earthbread as almighty envoys of the great creators-"

———

Platinum salt cookie, the virtue of solidarity, they were a knight who never let anyone down, usually when you were with them he teached you forms of how to fight. And they sometimes let you held their shining platinum sword. Which you absolutely loved.

———

You were watching Platinum salt cookie ad they fighted with that shinny sword, you always wondered, how it would be to hold it?

You got close to them, platinum salt stopping in their movements so they couldn't hurt you.

"What are you-?" They said as you touched the handle sword they were helding, while staying completely still. "I like swords, they look shiny"

Silver salt stayed silent for a moment before speaking again. "Have you ever thought of becoming a knight?" They asked you, you looked up to them, stopping holding the sword to start playing with your fingers "yes, no? I don't know, knights are cool" your answer made silver salt laugh.

"Don't worry my little knight, you will know your path when you get older and maybe we could train together someday." They said to you, which left you a little excited for the future.

———

And lastly Divine flour cookie, the virtue of volition, she was the founder of the Ivory pagoda, where a lot lf cookies went to wish their desires. You usually helped around the temple when you were with her.

———

You were sweeping with a broom every dirt you saw on the floors of the Ivory pagoda, which was very clean usually yet someone spilled some water on the floor and you knew how much responsabilities Divine flour has so you decided to clean it yourself.

While sweeping a figure came towards you from behind, you would have been startled yet you knew it was divine flour, her presence can be felt from miles away and you being close to her made you recognize her from far away.

"You don't have to do that my child" She stated calmly, insisting that you stop. "But I want to, this place is special" You insisted, making sure the floor was all clean.

"Why is this place special then my dear?" She asked calmly, wanting to hear your answer.

"Because you are here" The answer surprised her, making her smile warmling at you.

———

No matter how lovely a child is, they grow. Changing their habits and starting to act and look diferent and more mature, thats what happened to you.

You had grown up into a teenager, you were still very nice though your curious part of you has change into precation and maturity.

Currently you were in the spire of truth, reading a book in one of the many seats of the library, calmy looking through all the pages, a sense of calm and serenity washing all over you.

A smaller cookie approached you, looking at you curiosingly and doubt.

"Do you know where the child sector is?" The cookie asked, you just smiled at them.

"Yes, I do. Follow me" You got up from your chair, starting to walk towards the kids section while making sure the younger cookie didn't get lost.

You knew this place like the palm of your hand, having been here since you were a child made you know all the things in here and a lot of books in the place.

A few walks away and you two arrived. "Here we are, there are a lot of books. So make sure to not get too confused while choosing!" You said jokingly with a warm smile in your face watching as the small cookie got lost in the hundreds of book shelfs that were there.

Someone from behind you touched your shoulders, startling you and making you watch behind. "Blueberry milk cookie, don't scare me like that!" You exclaimed surprised, yet you didn't seem annoyed.

"Ah, that wasn't my intention to scare you" The saviour of knowledge stated to you, as calm as he always was, you wondered if he ever lost his composure.

Your thoughts were interrupted with his voice. "I saw how you helped that child, you know you don't have to do that right? It's my job" he commented to you.

You quickly answered "You work a lot around here, and it doesn't take a lot for me to help a bit. Also, the cookie came for help to me first. It's not polite to refuse to help them" You said calmly.

Blueberry milk cookie laughed at your answer. "You never change." He exclaimed with a smile. That phrase builded a questions in you. "What do you mean with that?"

He looked at you "Ever since you were a small cookie you helped around. I'm surprised you don't notice how helpful you are" He laughed a bit. Looking away at one of the windows.

"Warming spice is very strong and smart, yet when he first got you, you were very curious and It sometimes overwhelmed him so he usually left you here with me so I could take care of all your wonders, so I do know very well. I still can't believe how much you have grown since then" Blueberry milk looked at you warmly once again.

"Come on! Don't say that. You, the virtue of knowledge should know that cookies grow." You said, a little embarrased like if he was your parent showing you silly pictures of your childhood.

"I do" he said calmly. "I do very well, Spicy reader cookie" He looked away. This time not looking back at you.

"I have matters to do around here still, I guess the others would love to see you." Blueberry milk cookie said to you as a goodbye. Taking you off guard by how fast he left.

But you thought, he was right, you should visit one of the other saviour. Like divine flour cookie, she would love to see you.

You quickly went to find her in the ivory padora, the thousand stairs made you suffer but you didn't mind it that much since she was always there in the ivory pagoda if you were honest. Very few times you have seen her outside of that place.

You entered the holy place, finding a long line of cookies waiting to get their wishes fullfiled. Of course, this was what this place was all about.

Thankfully, due to knowing divine flour personally and usually helping around instead of praying for a wish you could enter withouth waiting in line.

You skipped through the cookies, most of them knew that you were here to help yet you sometimes heard a cookie mad for you skipping, how rude.

At the end of the line, there you saw her. Divine flour cookie. You quickly went to hug her. "Hello, my dear" She greeted you with serenity, yet you could sense her smile in her words, she started talking again "Why are you here my dear?" She asked curious. "I just wanted to see you" You stated calmly. "And to see if you needed help with anything." You added.

She seemed to be thinking about something for a moment before speaking once more. "You could see if the people from the praying rooms need something" She said to you "right away!"

———

A new kingdom has appeared, of course, thousands of new kingdoms appear everyday yet there is something new and especial about every single one of them that made you want to explore them.

You went to search for your dad, which was sitting on his throne. "Dad!" You called out to him. "Yes, my spice?" "There is a new kingdom, can we go see it?" You asked, your voice showing your exciment. "It's the third time this week" "but it is a new one!" Your dad sighed, seeming defeated. "Fine, I'll go with you" "yay!"

You both spent the next hours exploring the new kingdom you talked about, usually you both just looked through the markets but this time you both sat in a bench in front of a lake.

"Spicy reader cookie" "mm?" You looked at your father, yet he was staring straight to the lake.

"I'm proud of you" warming spice cookie stated out of the blue. "Of the cookie you have becomed, I mean" he added, you stayed silent, admiring the lake in front if you.

———

You were sitting in your bed while reading some newspaper as you hummed the song sparkling sugar teached you.

Lately your dad has been strange, everytime there is a new kingdom he doesn't accompany you to see it as he usually did before, but it doesn't matter, he must be tired and busy. He is a saviour after all. You just wished he would be free at least once, so you both could spent some bonding time.

Warming spice cookie has also been a lot more irritable, getting angry really easily and screaming at the servants and knights of the kingdom a lot. But you can only guess that he is stressed.

———

You walked through the halls of the palace you lived in, looking for your father in all places, just to find him in where you least expected him, in his throne.

You holded the door of the entrance with doubt, why was he here? He haves things to do. After all he is the light of change and the king in charge of this kingdom.

"Dad?" You called out to him as you approached him, he focused all of his attention on you. "There is a new kingdom, on the southern part actually, would you like to visit it with me? I heard they have pretty tasty food" You asked him, putting the best smile you could on your face to try to convince him.

"No" was the word that left his lips, it sounded cold, cruel. It left you in a state of confusion, did something happen that you didn't notice? "Uh, why not?" You said out loud, more of a wonder for you than a question yet he answered it. "I am busy, just go alone" warming spice cookie layed his head in his arms while showing a face of completely boredom.

It confused you even more. "But you aren't doing anything" You stated. Your words seemed to infuriate him. "Do you question what I do?" He snapped, you backed away out of surprise. "Me, your father? The light of change!" He got up from his throne to scream at you, making you squeal a little. "I... No! I just wondered..." You tried to say yet it came out as a mumble. With your hand you were hugging your form, as if that protected you in someway.

He got dead quiet at your answer, just to sit back at his throne like nothing happened. "Do whatever you want" He grumbled, his bored expression came back to his face. You quickly left the place to run back to your room, a little shaken up from the situation. Maybe he had a bad day. He seemed really mad after all, thats it...

Closing the door of your bedroom behind you, you threw yourself onto the bed. Hugging one of the pillows for comfort as you started sobbing. You wished that sparkling sugar was there, so she could play with her harp to calm you down.

You tried to hum the song she sings to you when you are sad, yet from your lips it only sounded like incoherent sobs.

———

You decided to go back to the spire of truth, this time mostly to see blueberry milk cookie since you needed advice.

Walking trough the doors into the big library you saw a lot of new books that you never saw before. 'This is interesting, change of plans' you thought as you got lost in the many halls of the library, opening the first book that catched your eye 'historic facts, hmm, this book might be entertaining!' You thought to yourself yet your expectation dropped when you found out that a lot of the facts in the book were, if not all, fake.

You should tell blueberry milk about this! He is surely overworked so he let a lot of these type of errors slip. You quickly went to search for him and tell him about the big error he let pass.

You found him in his counter as usual, he was sitting backwards, watching the big window that lead to the kingdom.

You interrumpted his calmness "hey, blueberry milk cookie?" He turned around to start looking at you. "Yes, my little lamb?" He said, with a wide smile.

"I found some books that have wrong imformation, that the entire thing is false." You informed him, just to receive a laugh in response.

"Oh, about that! I know about it, don't worry about it!" He explained to you as if that did it any better. "But, there are a lot of those" you tried to reason with him.

"Just leave it that way, a little lie doesn't hurt anybody " You felt your throath closen, yet you couldn't say anything really, he was the light of knowledge while you were the offspring of the light of change. Blueberry milk just knows better. "Fine, I guess..."

You left his counter withouth saying goodbye, too shocked to really say anything. But you guess he is right. Maybe by tomorrow he will go back to his senses and change all that nonsense.

———

Considering how down you have been feeling lately, you decided to visit sparkling sugar cookie, she doesn't really haves the best advice but she really knows how to calm you down.

Entering her paradise, you found a lot of the cookies looked all happy, but in a stramgely unnerving way. All having the same sense of satisfaction 'why is everybody looking like they ate too much candy' you thought to yourself. It doesn't matter really, maybe a big event that you wasn't aware of happened and now everybody is happy for that.

After a bit of looking, you found the person you were looking for. "Sparkling sugar cookie!" You called out to her, she looked at you with her bright pink eyes. Have them always been this bright?

"My sweetie!" She gushed, going to your side. "It's been soo long since I last saw you my swetie" She stated.

"I know, I'm sorry" you apologized. "I have been very worried lately, that's why I came here to see you, since you know. The harp and your voice" "Aw, thats soo sweet! But right now I'm a little lazy to sing but I can play some tunes for you if you want" she said to you with her voice sweet like sugar. To it seemed a little bit more deeper than last time you saw her, different from what you remember.

"Sure, I would like to" At your answer she made you both sit at one of the benches as she started to play the harp. It was mesmerizing, yet when you looked away from the harp and into Sparkling sugar something about her appearance was off, yet you couldn't pinpoint what it was.

Suddenly, you started to feel really happy, like you haven't had any of the worries you have had for the last couple of days. Which was strange since you did have and a lot. "Sparkling sugar?" "Hmm?" "I'm feeling really happy" You told her, she smiled at that.

"That is very good my sugar!" she said you. "After all, happiness is very important here, to always be happy" she said to you.

"If you stay here, you will always be happy! You won't have to even lift a finger and all of the rest of your life will be luxurious"

"I can't stay here, my dad-" "oh, don't worry about him! He doesn't and won't mind at all! After all he trusts me and he trust you to make the best choice for yourself, I am right?" She tried to convince "Yeah, I guess. But I stilll have a lot of things to do" you explained your reasons to not stay in the paradise, but sparkling sugar didn't really seem to care "You don't have to do them, I will have everything ready for you to stay here forever" she said while holding your hand, her hands were warm.

"No, I will go back home" you got up from you bench, a little confused as you left the place, Sparkling sugar cookie didn't really try to stop you yet you could feel how she seemed really irritated.

———

You walked home in silence, thinking about the conversation you had with Sparkling sugar over and over again, something was very wrong but everthing she said sounded just right.

You decided to ignore and forget, you had enough trouble with your dad being constantly angry to care about it.

The next days were similar, your dad being more demanding with the servants, knights and more importantly, with you.

You are afraid of talking to him since the slightest thing that ticks him off makes him extremely angry, is like being with a time bomb with no visible timer, you don't know when it's going to explode until the consequence of the explosion are shown.

So even though you felt bad you avoided your own father, trying to make shortcuts around your home just to avoid him.

Also, you just stopped visiting blueberry milk cookie after a while too. Everytime you went you just had a bad feeling in your gut that something was going to happen. So you just avoided the place altogether.

Same with Sparkling sugar, the last interaction scared you to your dough even if you didn't wanted to admit it since she didn't do anything wrong, she just wanted you to stay with her so you could be happy and you refused her very rude now that you think about it, so you feel bad.

And something strange happened with divine flour, just like the other you wanted to visit her but when you arrived to the Ivory Pagoda it was closed. Of course, Divine flour from time to time closes the Ivory Pagoda to take a break but she warns days before doing it. This time was withouth any type of warning or sign.

———

Walking trough the thousand stairs, you found yourself watching a closed altar, divine flour was no where in sight.

Outside there were a lot of angry cookies wanting to enter, to be able to pray for better and wish for goods.

You approached one of them. "Do you know why it is closed?" You asked, the cookie in front of you seemed really distressed "Nobody knows. There was no warnings, She just dissappeared." The cookie answered

"The Ivory Pagoda was completely shut down from inside out. So I guess divine flour is still inside. But there is no way to prove it, especially if no body can open the place."

You just looked at them with conflicted feelings "Thanks you for your honesty" You thanked them quietly, choosing to leave the place seconds after.

———

You were currently in silver salt's living room, usually you two trained together in order to get stronger but this time you were rambling to silver salt cookie about all the things that have been happening to you these past days while they prepared some tea for the both of you to drink.

"It is just soo strange! My dad have been very angry lately, I just can't have any normal conversation with him before he snaps, it is just so scary to talk to him" You explained to silver salt as best as you could. They placed a teapot and two cups in front of you in the table. Sitting beside you in the couch you were currently sitting on.

You spent the next minutes was you telling them your experiences with the other saviours, and the strange attitudes they have been having. They from time to time patted you on the back to give you comfort, listening attentively to you withouth saying any words.

Noticing their silence you stared at them, "Why aren't you saying anything?" You asked confused, then you sighed, looking straight ahead to the warm cup of tea in your hands. "Actually, I understand it, I wouldn't know what to say either..." you justified their actions. Taking the last sip before getting up from the couch.

"I should go home, I guess, Is getting late" you said with doubt while looking at the window. You walked to the door, opening it yourself.

"Goodbye" You said to him as you closed the door behind you. Not receiving an answer back. You ignored it, he must be as shocked as you are.

———

You felt dumb for not realising sooner, the signals were all over the place but you just decided to ignore or justify them, the way sparkling sugar wanted you to stay, how Blueberry milk wanted to lie a bit, how silent silver salt was, that the ivory pagoda was closed and more importantly, that your own father, warming spice cookie, was agressive towards you.

Once promised saviors, the five became twisted apostles of evil and brought only darkness and devastation. Their virtues becoming distortioned, Knowledge became Deceit, Volition became Apathy, Happiness became sloth, Change became destruction, and Solidarity became silence. But that wasn't the only thing that changed.

The cookies you adored since birth, the cookies that raised you since you left the oven for the first time changed too. Were replaced by shells of what they once used to be. You wanted to scream at them and reason with them, but you didn't want to become corrupted too. And you weren't that strong mentally to be able to decipher the manipulations of the now beasts before they got to your mind.

Ignoring your hurt feelings and broken heart you had to evacuate the entire kingdom as fast as you possibly could so there is the smallest amount of hurt citizens. As the next in charge of the kingdom you had the obligation to take care of the citizens, even from the own king or this time around, your own father.

You were currently in a Refugee camp, made out of neccesity, emergency and desperation. Though all the cookies in there including yourself made the pact to call it a safe haven so the younger cookies don't loose their hopes of survival and a the wish of a better future.

Holding tightly a weapon, you practiced your fighting skills a little. You were the child of the once light of change so you knew how to protect yourself and others. But you wanted to be able to protect your citicens and your kingdom if you had to fight face to face with one of the beast, at least even if you aren't strong enough to win you will be able to buy the citizen cookies some time to escape.

Even so there was something you couldn't fully grasp, the way the cookies glared at you and your sword. The whispers that paused when you got close. How weak the cookies sounded when they talked to you. And yet the younger cookies adored you, being close to you in the 'safe haven' at almost all times while the more older cookies were just soo strange. You just wished you knew what was the thing they disliked about you.

———

In the back of the emergency camp you could see a group of cookies in the furthest corner talking fast, yet no more loud than a mere whisper.

You choosed to eavesdrop it, making sure nothing was out of your control here "The supplies are getting lower and lower by the day! They are going to become scarce in just a few days" one of the cookies whispered, it's voice showing the desperation all in the place were trying to hide, you then opted to interrumpt the cookies.

"The supplies are getting low?" You asked calmly, yet with a serious face that didn't seem to unwaver. "Spicy reader" one of them gasped, but not in a good manner. "We were just wondering about how the supplies were! Please don't get mad at us" "And why would I get mad?" You asked, something that irked in the back of your mind until now told you all the answers you didn't wanted to hear.

But then an aching pain started in your heart. Is right, they are afraid of you. After all you are related to the now beast of destruction. They have every reason to distrust you and that makes you sad.

"Im not him" You quickly replied to your own question, not waiting for the cookies in front of you to answer. "Warmi- Burning spice cookie, I mean. You all can trust me" you tried to calm them down and ease their fears, However it didn't seem like your words calmed their worries about you completely they had no choice but to rely on you.

"We need supplies, all the cookies here do." One of them said worried. You listened intently to it and thought.

"We could do an expedition" You suggested after a bit of thinking "It's the only think we can do right now" You explained calmly.

"Of course, having a garden would be nice and it would bring food easily yet it requires time, work and a safe place we do not have as of now."

———

Later that day some of the strongest cookies including you packed some provisions and prepared everything to leave. You grabbed your weapon, holding it tight in your hand, hopefully you don't have to use it...

"Spicy reader cookie?" A shy child-like voice called out to you, when you looked the place where it came from. You found a young cookie, but wait... You know this cookie! They were the young cookie you helped at the library where blueberry milk cookie used to work at. How long ago was it?

"Please don't go! We need you here!" The child cookie cried out to you, your heart tightened yet you had already made a choice. "Hey, it's okay. Nothing will happen to me. I will go back here with you full of food, water and toys! Isn't that nice?" You said with a excited voice. Tho it didn't seem to calm the younger cookie.

"We have to go" One of the cookies called out to you, all of the ones that were going expeditioning were on the exit. The child tried to grab your hand yet you were faster to leave.

"I will come back, I promise!" You said to them as you left the 'safe haven'

———

Outside it was a mess, the kingdoms were utterly destroyed, the forest were devoid of nature and the worst thing to see, the lifeless body of thousands of cookies. You tried to close your eyes everytime you saw one.

You were currently in a forest that hasn't saw the horror of devastation yet, grabbing the fruits from the trees and putting them in a basket was all you did.

The chirping sound of a bird called your attention, it has been soo long since you saw a bird or animals in general! You got away from the group, ready to pet the bird.

When close enough to the bird you kneeled in front of it, holding your arms out to it, trying to touch it, The bird let you pet them. It felt soft, you felt calm for once in a long time, your multiple thoughts being reduced to the state of calmness you were currently in.

"What is that?" You heard one of the cookies squeal from far away, making you realice weren't currently in a safe place. Then you heard the sound of slicing from behind you, then screams of agony that were quickly turn into dead silence in the fraction of mere seconds.

The bird was quick to fly off, leaving you alone with a sense of dread.

"That was... soo boring!" You heard a masculine voice roar full of boredom, a voice you fully knew to who it belonged.

You quickly grabbed your weapon, holding it tight as you were full of fear, yet determination.

"Father!" The scream made burning spice cookie to turn it's head to look at you, you holded your sword upright towards him.

"This is wrong, very wrong" you said, trying to keep your voice as neutral. But he was your father and he knew you too well to know that you were having very conflicted feelings. "Stop, for what? Nothing changed for thousands of years, so I did something to change the path myself" He explained, you didn't recognize the person who was in front of you, you didn't recognized your father in any shape from long ago.

"Warming spice-" You said, quickly realicing your error and stopping your tracks, Burning Spice cookie looked at you with more hatred, yet for some reason he didn't attack you yet.

"My spice, you are betting for the losing team" He started with. "You could join us, the beasts. You will be strong, the strongest cookie between all of these weaklings." "So Spicy Y/n, will you join me,?" The thought of ever being by their side made your stomach churn.

"Remember how excited you got when you were youngef thinking about becoming the next ruler, do you want to give up that dream now?"

Listening to his proposal, that wouldn't be so bad, But... what are you thinking? You are just griefing about the past and how things used to be before "I... Can not..." You said between breaths, more slowly than you should have due to the shock, but you quickly recomposed yourself.

All of those cookies that would be alone and afraid with another threath...

"I will fight for us to go back to normal, even if I crumble in the process" You stated with pure determition, looking at burning spice cookie eyes, the hold of your weapon was more secure now. Your answer seemed to irritate yet awaken something in Burning spice you couldn't decipher.

You took the first strike, trying to hit him with you weapon yet he dodged it, he then tried to slice you with his axe like weapon. you barely managed to dodge it, But you did and you weren't going to back down any time soon.

For the next minutes you both fighted, one for a greater good and the other just for the thrill, but it was obvious who was the stronger one.

As time passed you have got more tired and weak, beong more reckless and slow in your movements too. But you can't give up now, not when you are soo close of winning...

Burning spice cookie threw his axe at you, you were going to dodge it but you could only gasp when you felt your jam blood start to paint your hands.

"D-dad?" You mumbled real shaky, as you instantly fell to the ground due to the pain. Something flashed in burning spice eyes, Something you recognized.

"Spicy reader cookie!" He screamed at you, more desperate. His voice wasn't as sweet and calm as warming spice's cookie was but it wasn't like the last time you heard it. It was... something in the middle of corruption and pureness.

Burning spice cookie kneeled to your side, yet he didn't touch you nor tried to heal you. "I thought that you were... stronger..." Burning spice cookie said with a conflicted voice. That made you uneasy "I should have trained to be stronger back then, so you and I wouldn't have ended like this..." you cried out, already feeling.

He seemed taken aback, but he quickly got up from where he was, watching as you slowly stopped breathing until your heart wasn't beating anymore. Not doing anything to help you change your fate, yet not willing to let you go.

"I'm sorry" a voice that sounded like warming spice said to you, in your last moments you got esctatic to be able to hear it one more time. "Warming spice cookie? I'm so glad I can hear you once more dad!" You said your last words with a cracky voice, that showed your happy sorrows, your eyes red from crying showing the brightest joy he has ever seen in a while from you, and the last.

You died believing that your dad finally got back to his senses even if it was through your death, which you would have been happy if that was like it, but it wasn't. Your death showed a very vulnerable piece of him that burning spice would never want to admit, and finally seeing you gone made him yet weaker, fall even more into the depths of darkness.

He was weak from the fight, since you took a lot of power out of him, but he feels a regret he doesn't know he will be able to repair, but yes to numb. How? Destroying everything that once reminded him of you.

———

After your death was announced burning spice was full of energy yet at the same time he was utterly heartbroken, while the other beasts were mad, completely mad and repeled and disgusted by Burning spice cookie. Causing a rift between all of the beast, to which in consequence made them constantly fight eachother, making them weak, mentally and physically.

The witches took advantage of their weak state due to the loss of a loved one. Caging the beast and sealing them far away from any cookies they could hurt. planting the seed of the Silver Tree around their cages to ensure their evil power never sees the light of day again. From then on, this land where the Beasts were put to sleep, was called Beast-Yeast.

Your name was deleted from history books, your appearance was forgotten, everything that you once said or did was destroyed beyond repair or removed, Everything you once were was gone. Only being remembered as the unnamed dead offspring of the beast of destruction. Everything was forgotten about you, except one thing. Your sacrifice.

You died by the hands of your own father, who has fell under the dark ways of corruption, and instead of taking the easy way and joining him you choosed to fight for the greater good. Which led to the beasts to be finally weakened enough to be put in their silver cage even if that lead to your innevitable death.

The witches knew one thing that the cookies did not, you were deserving of life. You did everything right in your life, your only wrong doing was being the child of a beast. So the witch that baked you knew one thing. You deserved a second chance, a rebirth. So you could live another life and this time have a happy ending.

But when? The witch decided you were going to be rebaked the moment you were found a worthy caretaker. Someone you could look up to and who wouldn't fall into the depths of darkness. Only when someone like that was found, you would be rebaked one more time.

Notes: It got a little lazy at the end, ignore it, I has to rewrite the whole Eternal dugar part since I wrote it a little before the update and I got tired due to that.

Also, there isn't really a lot of information about how were the beasts before corruption so i did my best. I also made Silent salt cookie gender neutral since I don't know their gender.

Comments, likes and reconstructive criticism are highly appreciated!

Tag list: @masterradd-28

Tell me in the comments if you want to be added to the tag list

[sunbeamlessreads]

Last Hand - Doc Holliday x Reader One-Shot

❝ If Doc Holliday had decided he was done with living, then he sure as hell was going to look you in the eyes when he said it. ❞

[doc holliday x reader]

~6.2k words | rated: E

tw: 18+, explicit content, suicidal ideation, grief, terminal illness (TB), canon-typical violence, themes of death/loss

implied past relationship. a town held together by dust and bullets. he tries to die quiet—you won’t let him.

notes: This was a request for my lovely friend @milesalexanderteller. She’s been going through it IRL lately and she really deserves this. I added my own little twist for the end. I'm sorry if I make you cry!!

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The dust hadn’t even settled yet.

It still hung in the air, clinging to your skin and clothes like a second layer, gritty and bitter. You could taste gunpowder in the back of your throat. Could still hear faint echoes of shouting somewhere down the street, like Tombstone itself hadn’t quite caught its breath.

You hadn’t seen Doc since before the shooting started.

He hadn’t come back yet. Certainly not to you, at least.

You were moving quickly, boots crunching through the dirt as you cut behind the building, hoping maybe he’d circled around. That maybe he was leaning somewhere, cigarette lit, with that infuriating half-smile like the day hadn’t nearly ended in blood.

Instead, you heard your name—low and steady.

“Hey.”

You stopped short. Turned.

Wyatt stood just beyond the edge of the alley, half in shadow, arms crossed over his chest. He looked rough—his usual crisp lines undone, hat crooked, dust clinging to every part of him. There was blood on his shirt, high on the shoulder, but it didn’t seem to be his. A dark smear ran across his jaw like someone had tried to grab him mid-fight. His holster was still unbuckled, gun half-loose at his side.

But it was his eyes that made your stomach twist. Wyatt Earp always looked ready for a fight, whether he wanted to be in it or not. But right now, he looked… tired.

“Got a minute?” he asked, not waiting for an answer before turning and nodding toward the alley.

You followed in silence. The light was dimmer there, the buildings blocking the last rays of sun. The sound of the street faded behind you until all you could hear was the quiet scuff of boots, the soft creak of wood, a few flies buzzing lazily near an overturned crate.

Wyatt didn’t speak right away. He came to a stop by the back wall of the saloon, hands resting on his belt like he was weighing the next few seconds in his head. He didn’t look at you—just stared out toward nothing.

You crossed your arms, heartbeat already picking up. Something about the way he held himself—the stiffness in his shoulders, the tension in his jaw—it put you on edge.

Then he said it.

“Doc’s been tryin’ to get himself killed.”

It was flat. Not dramatic. No buildup. Like it hurt less if he just ripped the damn thing open.

You blinked a few times.

“What?”

Wyatt glanced at you, then looked away just as fast.

“I finally saw it for what it was today. Clear as anything. He stepped right into the open in the middle of the shootout. No cover. Nothin’.”

He rubbed a hand across his mouth, like saying it left a taste he didn’t want.

“Didn’t duck. Didn’t even flinch when bullets started hittin’ the walls around him. Just… stood there. Took his shot at a man with his gun already drawn, like it was just another hand of cards to play.”

You felt your body tense, muscles coiling so tight it made your ribs ache.

“He’s been doin’ it more and more lately,” Wyatt continued. “Starting fights with men twice his size. Drunk half the damn time. And he doesn't wait for backup—hell, sometimes he doesn’t even tell us he’s goin’.”

He shook his head, voice low.

“It’s not just recklessness anymore. It’s suicide.”

You stared at him, throat dry, chest tight. Your mind tried to argue—tried to reach for some rational excuse—but it landed on nothing.

Doc hadn’t told you any of this.

And that silence suddenly meant more than anything he could’ve said.

Wyatt shifted again, his expression cracking under the weight of it.

“I tried talkin’ to him,” he said. “He just laughed. Told me if death was comin’, he’d rather it take him sooner than later. Said at least out there, he gets to choose the time and place.”

You swallowed hard. It felt like your body had turned to stone.

“I ain’t tryin’ to guilt you or anythin’,” Wyatt added after a beat, more gently. “But I’ve seen you be the only person in this whole damn town he listens to. Even when he pretends not to.”

He paused. Let it hang.

“I don’t want to have to drag his body out of the street. And I certainly don’t want you to have to see it.”

The words hit you low. You didn’t flinch. Didn’t move. You just kept staring ahead—past Wyatt, past the alley, past the part of you that wanted to crumple where you stood.

You felt cold, and it had nothing to do with the wind that had picked up between the buildings.

Your hands curled into fists at your sides, nails biting into your palms.

You turned without a word.

Didn’t wait for Wyatt to say anything else. Didn’t let him see what was happening behind your eyes.

You walked back toward the saloon with fire building in your chest. Every step felt heavier than the last. Like the truth he’d handed you was too big to carry—but you’d carry it anyway.

Because if Doc Holliday had decided he was done with living, then he sure as hell was going to look you in the eyes when he said it.

The noise hit you before the doors even opened.

Laughter, clinking glasses, the clatter of poker chips on oak, boots on floorboards, and someone hammering out a tune on the piano that had long since fallen off-key. The room pulsed with heat and whiskey sweat, and under it all, that constant hum of men who thought they were untouchable—full of guns and bravado and cheap beer. Even after the happenings of the day.

You pushed the saloon doors open with a little more force than necessary.

For a moment, no one noticed. You were just another body walking in off the street, swallowed by cigar smoke and dim light.

But then you stepped in fully, boots echoing sharp against the floor, and the crowd seemed to shift. Not with words. Just a subtle awareness—like animals catching the scent of something coming that wasn’t good.

And then you saw him.

Doc Holliday sat like a goddamn centerpiece at the farthest poker table, sprawled in a chair like it was a throne. One hand held a fan of cards, the other rested casually on a half-empty glass of bourbon, the deep amber catching fire in the low lamplight. His hat was tipped back, his shirt unbuttoned at the collar, and he was smiling—that slow, lazy, devastating smile that could smooth over murder if he wanted it to.

He looked relaxed. Smug. Untouched.

He looked like he hadn’t almost died.

And something inside you snapped.

He hadn’t seen you yet. He was laughing at something someone said—low and smooth, smoke curling from between his teeth, eyes shining with the thrill of the game. A few men groaned and tossed in their cards. One cursed and leaned back, scowling.

And then he spotted you.

His gaze cut through the room like a blade, and that smile—God, that smile—grew just a fraction wider. He stood up in one fluid motion, smoothing a hand down the front of his vest, cigarette perched between two fingers like a punctuation mark.

“Well now,” he drawled, like you were a pleasant surprise. “Ain’t you a—”

Your hand moved before your mind could catch up.

SMACK

The slap rang out like a gunshot. Loud, sharp, final.

His head turned with the force of it. The cigarette slipped from his fingers and hit the floor, still lit. His whole body froze—so did the rest of the saloon.

Silence bloomed in an instant. The kind that feels like thunder in reverse. Someone coughed, somewhere near the bar. The piano keys fell quiet mid-note. The dealer’s hand hung in the air above a split pot. Even the air seemed to hold its breath.

Doc didn’t look at you. Not at first.

He just stood there, jaw tight, cheek blooming red beneath your handprint, eyes cast downward like he was running through a thousand possible reactions and finding none that fit.

You were shaking.

Not with regret. Not with fear. With fury. With heartbreak so sharp it made your bones feel like glass.

You stared at him like he was a stranger.

“You selfish son of a bitch,” you said, voice low, steady, but trembling at the edges.

He finally lifted his gaze to you—slow, searching. And maybe, just for a second, the smugness fell. Not gone, but hollowed out at the center.

You didn’t wait for a response.

You turned and walked out.

Each step felt louder than it should’ve. Your pulse thundered in your ears as you pushed through the saloon doors and into the cold night air, where the dust had started to rise again with the wind.

Behind you, the crowd stayed frozen in that stunned silence. Somewhere, someone whispered your name. Another voice said “Holy hell.” You didn’t stop. Didn’t slow down. You shoved the swinging doors wide and stepped into the cool night air.

You were halfway down the steps when you heard the scrape of a chair, the clatter of a glass hitting wood, and boots—heavy, purposeful—coming after you.

You didn’t have to look back to know it was him.

You could feel it, like a storm at your heels.

The door flew open hard enough to rattle the hinges, slamming into the wall with a bang that shook dust from the beams overhead. After the door steadied from the prior abuse, Doc slammed it closed back behind him, unceremoniously.

You didn’t flinch.

You were standing near the dresser, back to the door, staring down at your hands. They were still shaking. You hated that.

“You got a hell of a lotta nerve.”

His voice was sharp, low, laced with the kind of fury that didn’t come from pain—it came from pride. From being caught off-guard. From being made a fool.

You turned slowly. Not with fear—with purpose.

Doc stood a few feet away, his jaw tight, his face still flushed from the slap. The print of your hand burned red across his cheek. He hadn’t wiped it away. Maybe he hadn’t had time. Maybe he didn’t know what to do with it yet.

His hat was gone now. He crossed the room in a few quick strides, shoulders tense, boots hitting the floor like gunshots.

His face was still flushed. The red mark on his cheek stood out, stark against his pale skin, and his jaw was locked so tight you could see the muscle twitch.

“You want to tell me what the hell that was?” he snapped. “Or should I guess?”

He laughed—once. Harsh. Hollow.

“Whole goddamn saloon starin’ at me like I’d said somethin’ vile. Like I deserved it. You blindside me in front of half the town and walk out like you’re the one wronged?”

He stepped closer, gesturing vaguely with one hand, the other curled into a tight fist at his side.

“Did I cheat you? Did I lie? Did I forget your damn birthday?” His tone was mocking now, but the edge behind it was real. “Or was that just for show? You get somethin’ outta that?”

Now he was pacing, boots scraping the floor, hands twitching like he didn’t know whether to pull his hair or punch the wall.

“You think that’s what this is about?” you said, low and sharp. “You think I walked in there just to bruise your pride?”

Doc didn’t back down. He turned to meet your gaze head-on, but there was something unsettled in the way his fingers twitched at his side.

“Well I certainly think I deserve to know why I got blindsided in the middle of a damn good poker hand.”

You stared at him, then laughed. Not with humor. It came out raw. Broken.

“You deserve to know?” you echoed. “You want to talk about what you deserve?”

You closed the distance between you in two furious steps and shoved him—not hard, but enough to make his boots scrape against the floorboards.

“You think I wouldn’t find out?” you hissed. “That you could just keep throwing yourself in front of bullets like it’s nothing and no one would notice?”

His brows pulled together.

“Wyatt told me,” you spat before he could speak. “He told me everything.”

Doc froze. You saw the mask start to slip.

“He told me how you walked straight into open fire,” you continued, stepping closer. “Told me you went after a man already drawin' on you. Like you didn’t give a damn whether you made it out.”

You were inches from him now, breathing hard, staring up into those pale eyes that always held a joke—but not tonight.

“I’ve seen you drunk. I’ve seen you bleeding. I’ve seen you cough your lungs up and spit red into a handkerchief like it doesn’t mean a goddamn thing. But this?” Your voice cracked. “This is you giving up.”

He looked down at you, chest rising and falling like he’d run a mile. But he didn’t answer.

So you hit him with the one thing he couldn’t dodge.

“You were ready to up and die,” you whispered. “And you didn’t even think I deserved to know.”

That landed.

He stepped back half a pace, like you’d struck him again.

His mouth opened, then closed. His tongue wet his lips, slow. You saw it all happen in real time—his ego folding in on itself, that anger unraveling into something thinner, sadder. Guilt. Shame.

“I didn’t tell you,” he said finally, voice hoarse, “because I didn’t want you lookin’ at me the way everybody else does.”

You swallowed hard.

“And how’s that?”

“Like I’m already in the ground.”

Silence filled the space between you like smoke—thick, choking, unspoken things hanging in the air.

“You think I don’t see it?” he said. “The way people look at me when I cough. Like they’re just waitin’ on me to drop.”

He took another step forward, slower this time, like he didn’t want to spook you.

“But you didn’t look at me like that,” he said. “Not once.”

You wanted to scream. Cry. Shake him.

“I still don’t,” you whispered. “Yet you still chose to keep me in the dark. You didn’t even give me the chance to fight for you.”

Doc’s breath caught. His hands twitched at his sides, then slowly came up—reaching for you like a man touching water in a desert.

“You’re the only thing I got left that makes me feel like I’m still here,” he said stepping toward you, holding a sincere eye-contact.

Your chest cracked open.

You didn’t move when his hands cupped your face. Didn’t flinch when he brushed his thumbs under your jaw, tilting your head back like he needed to see all of you. His touch was trembling. He was trembling.

Then he kissed you.

It wasn’t soft.

It was desperate.

Mouth crashing into yours, breath hot, hands threading into your hair like he was trying to memorize the way you felt before death took him away from you. You kissed him back just as hard, fingers fisting in his shirt, pulling him down to you like you could break the habit of death with your body alone.

And for the first time in what felt like forever, he kissed you like he was trying to live.

The kiss slammed into you like a wave breaking a dam.

There was no warning—just hands, heat, and the raw sound of breath catching in the back of his throat as his mouth crushed into yours. It wasn’t careful. It wasn’t sweet. It was violent in its urgency, desperate in a way that bordered on collapse.

You tasted smoke and bourbon on his tongue, tasted the fear he refused to speak out loud.

And you gave it right back.

Your hands slid into his hair. His fingers dropped to your waist, gripping the layers of fabric at your hips in frustration.

“Too many goddamn clothes,” he rasped, half-laughing, half-growl. “You tryna drive me insane, sweetheart?”

“You first,” you gasped, stepping back from him.

He pulled back just enough to meet your eyes—like you’d just dared him—and the look he gave you was half fire, half challenge.

Then his hands went to his waistcoat.

He didn’t waste time. The buttons came undone fast under his fingers, and he flung the thing off like it had no right to be between the two of you. His gunbelt and holster followed with a dull thud on the floor, then he was at the buttons of his shirt—no finesse now, just a frenzy of motion. He popped them open down his chest, and when one stuck, he tore the fabric loose, baring pale skin and a body cut hard by illness and held together by sheer will.

He returned to you and spun you gently—urgently—until your chest pressed to the wall, your hands bracing yourself against the wood. You felt him behind you, breath hot at your shoulder, hands already at the back of your corset.

“You wear this thing like a goddamn suit of armor,” he muttered. “What’s it protecting you from?”

“Men like you.”

He made a low, breathless sound—almost a laugh—and then you felt the tug of his fingers against the laces.

They didn’t come easily. Corset laces never did. But he worked fast, muttering curses under his breath as he loosened them enough to let you breathe. The pressure in your ribs eased. His fingers slid up your back, slipping beneath the loosened stays, tugging the entire thing over your head without ceremony.

The shift underneath clung to your skin, sweat-slick and thin. He spun you back toward him, ran his palms down your sides, up under your arms, then cupped your breasts through the damp linen. His mouth found yours once again for a kiss almost as desperate as the first.

“Still mad?” he panted, voice hoarse against your lips.

You nodded, breath hitching. “Furious.”

“Good.” His teeth scraped against your jaw, dragging down to the hinge of your throat where he bit—not hard, but enough to make you gasp again. “Don’t want you soft. Not for this.”

You barely had time to take in the sight of him—long lines, lean muscle, sharp hips, and heat in every breath—before his fingers were at his belt buckle, pulling it loose in a swift, practiced motion. His trousers hit the floor with a low rustle, and then he was stepping forward again, stripped to skin, eyes locked on you like he was starving and you were the last thing left worth tasting.

His hands slid to your waist—not rough, but insistent—guiding you backward through the glow and stillness, until your knees hit the edge of the bed. You let yourself fall back with a soft laugh of breath, landing on the mattress in a rush of tangled skirts and flushed skin.

He followed you down immediately—slow, controlled, lowering himself over you like gravity was finally on his side. One arm braced beside your head, the other still dragging your shift higher, fingers shaking with need.

You looked up at him, every inch of your body already singing for more, and the words tumbled out like a secret slipping past your lips.

“God,” you whispered, half to yourself, half to the stars. “I love you.”

He went still—not in surprise, but in triumph.

His grin was slow. Crooked. Dangerous.

“Oh, you do, do you?” he drawled, eyes gleaming even as his breath still came in short, ragged bursts.

Your face flushed hotter. “I didn’t mean—”

He cut you off with a kiss that tasted like sin and smoke.

“You love me,” he murmured against your mouth, like he was trying the words on for size. “Say it again. I want to hear it when you're lookin’ me in the eyes.”

“I love you, Doc.” You cupped his face with both hands, even as your hips ground against him. “I love you, you reckless, brilliant bastard. Even when you scare the hell out of me.”

He swallowed hard, nostrils flaring. “I ain’t worth that kind of love.”

“Tough,” you said. “You’ve got it anyway.”

He didn’t answer.

He just looked at you—something wrecked and reverent flickering behind his eyes—and then he kissed you again. Slower this time, but no less hungry. Like the words you’d just spoken had knocked the wind out of him, and now he was using your mouth to pull breath back into his lungs.

His hand slid lower, under your shift and over the bare skin of your thigh, fingers slipping between your legs like he’d been there a thousand times in his mind. When he found how wet you were, he groaned low in his chest.

“Jesus Christ,” he muttered, forehead pressed to yours. “That all for me?”

You couldn’t speak—just nodded, breath catching as his fingers stroked through the slick heat of you.

He kissed you again, open-mouthed and aching, while his hand worked slow, steady circles against your clit. Every flick of his fingers made your hips rise, your legs tighten. The warmth coiled sharp and fast, your body already trembling from the tension that had now broken since the moment you slapped him in that saloon.

His mouth moved to your throat, lips dragging down to your collarbone. “Let me hear you,” he whispered. “Let me feel it.”

You moaned as he slid a finger inside you—then another—stretching you just enough to make your back arch, your breath stutter. His fingers curled, searching, teasing. His thumb circled with steady pressure, pulling you closer, closer—

But before the wave could crash, he stopped.

You whimpered.

He pulled his fingers free, eyes locked on yours, and brought them to his mouth. Sucked them clean.

Then he rose to his knees between your thighs, gripping your hips as he shifted you towards the center of the bed, moving with you. Your skirts were still rucked around your waist, drawers shoved aside, shift hanging loose over your breasts. You were a mess of fabric and sweat and need.

He looked down at you like a man who’d finally found something to live for.

And then he lined himself up and pushed into you with one long, devastating stroke.

Not gentle—but not brutal either. It was pure need, sharpened to the bone. You gasped, one arm wrapped tight around his back, the other tangled in the sheets, your body clenching around him like it already knew he wouldn’t last long like this.

He pulled back and drove into you again—rough, deep, each thrust a little more ragged, a little less controlled. He groaned into your shoulder, hips jerking harder now, like he was chasing something just out of reach.

But he was breathing too hard.

You felt it—heard it—in the way his rhythm started to falter, his weight sagging more into your body. A soft cough rattled from his chest, one that he tried to swallow, but it pushed out between clenched teeth as he rocked forward again, slower now, less force behind it.

He kept going—God, he tried—but his arms were shaking, his breath was stuttering, and after one more broken thrust, he dropped down beside you, chest heaving, one arm slung across your stomach.

“Shit,” he breathed, voice hoarse, “I’m sorry. I can’t—I want to—just can’t keep it up.”

He turned his face into the pillow, coughing softly, wet and low in his lungs.

“I want to fuck you through the damn floor,” he muttered, jaw clenched. “But I’m so goddamn tired already.”

You looked over at him—his hair damp with sweat, his skin pale and burning, the fever hiding just beneath the surface—and something inside you melted. Not out of pity.

Out of need.

Because he was still trying.

Because he hadn’t given up.

You reached out and touched his face, fingertips trailing along his cheek, then his throat. His eyes opened—barely—and when he looked at you, something in them flickered like he didn’t know what to expect.

So you straddled him.

Slow. Sure. A deliberate climb over his hips as he blinked up at you in open surprise.

“Darlin’,” he rasped, hands finding your thighs instinctively, voice caught somewhere between reverence and disbelief.

You leaned down, nose brushing his. “Then let me do it for you.”

And before he could stop you, before he could find the strength to argue, you reached between your bodies and guided him back inside you—slow, deep, all the way down with a breathless moan that made his hands grip tighter.

His head tipped back against the pillow, throat bobbing with a swallowed groan.

“Jesus Christ,” he whispered. “You’re gonna kill me.”

You rolled your hips, slow and controlled, pressing your palms to his chest as he gasped beneath you.

“No,” you said, eyes locked to his. “It’s my intention to keep you here as long as I can.”

A beat passed, heavy with anticipation. His breath hitched, he stifled a cough, the weight of your words sinking in. Then, as if overwhelmed by the gravity of the moment, his head fell back, mouth slack.

“Fuck,” he rasped, head falling back, mouth slack. “Jesus. Goddamn.”

You were shaking already. From the stretch, the pressure, the sight of him undone beneath you. He was so deep, your thighs already trembling from how tightly your body gripped him.

You started to move—slow, steady rolls of your hips, every grind dragging another sound out of him that made you throb around him.

But Doc wasn’t going to just lie still. Not even broken, not even panting beneath you like the breath kept slipping away faster than he could drag it in.

His hands yanked you down harder.

“Faster,” he growled, voice dark and ragged. “Come on, sweetheart. Give it to me.”

You gasped, hands braced on his chest. “I don’t want to break you.”

He let out a low, vicious sound—half laugh, half threat.

“Too late for that.”

He bucked up beneath you the best he could, hips snapping with sudden force, catching you mid-thrust and driving himself deeper, harder than you were ready for.

You cried out, full-body shudder, your hands scrambling for balance as he kept thrusting up into you, every motion fueled by something furious and raw.

“You think I’m just gonna lie here?” he bit out, voice hoarse, sweat slicking his chest. “Think you can get on top and make me behave? You know I'm not one to behave darlin'.”

His mouth was at your breast before you could answer—teeth scraping over your nipple, tongue hot, hands bruising your ass as he shoved you down, used you to do what he couldn’t do himself.

“Ride me,” he growled against your skin. “Come on, darlin’. Give it to me.”

Your body obeyed before your mind could catch up. You moved—hard and fast—grinding down with a gasp as he met you halfway, every thrust of his hips sloppy now, but still fierce, still intentional, like he was fighting the weakness in his limbs with everything he had.

Your forehead dropped to his as you bounced in his lap, both of you slick and shaking, skin slapping hard with every ragged thrust. He was breathing like he was about to collapse, but his hands were still firm, still dragging you down onto his cock like he couldn’t stand the thought of you pulling away.

“God, you feel so good,” he panted. “Like heaven. Like fucking heaven.”

His voice was breaking. So was his body. But his eyes—his eyes were locked on you, wide and hungry and alive, like this was the only thing keeping his heart beating.

“Don’t stop,” he begged, half-wrecked. “Don’t stop, darlin'. Not yet.”

You didn’t.

You drove down like it was the last thing either of you would ever do—hard, fast, your nails digging into his chest, your hips stuttering as the pressure built fast and furious.

“Doc—” you gasped, head falling forward. “I’m gonna—fuck—I’m gonna come.”

His hand shot up to the back of your neck, pulling you down, foreheads pressed, sweat-slick skin against sweat-slick skin. His eyes locked onto yours—dark, glazed, desperate.

“No,” he whispered, voice raw. “Not yet. Hold on for me, darlin’.”

Your whole body seized, trembling from the effort to stop the climb. Your thighs burned. Your pulse pounded in your ears. Your cunt clenched around him like your body didn’t care what your mind was trying to do—it wanted release. But you obeyed. You stayed right there—balanced on the edge, muscles coiled, every nerve frayed, every breath a battle.

“I wanna feel you break with me,” he murmured, lips brushing yours. “Don’t let go without me. Not yet. I need—” His voice cracked. “I need this right now.”

You nodded—barely, shakily. “Okay. Okay, baby.”

You rocked your hips slower now, grinding down onto him with control you barely had. Every drag of him inside you made you shake, made your breath falter, made your walls twitch around him in desperate, pulsing waves.

He felt it. He groaned—deep and ruined.

“You’re so close,” he said, almost to himself. “I can feel it. Fuck, you’re… you’re shaking.”

“I have to come,” you whispered, voice trembling. “Please—please, Doc—”

“Not yet,” he said again, rasping like it cost him to say it. “Almost, darlin’. Just—almost—”

His hands were all over you now, frantic. One gripped your waist, trying to guide your rhythm, even though his muscles trembled with the effort. The other slid up to your breast, squeezing rough and clumsy, thumb flicking over your nipple like he was trying to coax you into holding out just a little longer. His mouth dragged up to your throat, kissing, biting, panting.

You buried your face in his neck, moaning, biting down to keep yourself from breaking. You could feel your orgasm right there, clawing at the edge of your spine, demanding release.

He bucked up into you again—sloppy but deep—and choked on a groan. “Just a little more, sweetheart. Stay with me. Please. Fuck—I’m so close.”

And you did.

You held out for him.

You held it until your muscles locked, until your legs were shaking and your fingernails left half-moon dents in his chest and shoulder. You held it until your body screamed, until you thought you’d explode just from the tension.

“Now,” he whispered. “Come now.”

Your body obeyed like it had just been waiting for the command.

The second the words left his mouth, everything inside you snapped. Your hips slammed down on him one final time as the tension that had been coiled like wire through your spine exploded—hot and all-consuming.

Pleasure ripped through you so hard it hurt. You clamped down around him, pulsing in sharp, rhythmic waves that left you gasping, keening, grinding against him like you couldn’t get close enough. Your fingers scrambled for purchase—his chest, his shoulders, the slick heat of his skin under your palms—anything to anchor yourself while the world dropped out from under you.

Your vision blurred. Your thighs trembled violently around his hips. Your mouth opened but no words came out, just ragged moans and desperate little sounds you couldn’t hold back.

The pleasure hit you like a storm—sharp, shaking, so big it felt like grief and joy all at once. You weren’t just coming—you were coming undone.

Your hands fisted in the sheets, in his hair, in his shoulders—anything to keep yourself grounded now. But there was nothing solid. Just him. Just Doc. Just the sound of your name falling from his mouth like a prayer as he gripped your hips, holding you flush to him, thrusting up into you with the last of his strength.

Doc cursed—loud, broken—his hands flexing hard on your hips as your release hit him, too. He came with you, gasping your name as his head fell back, voice ragged and ruined.

“God—fuck—yes,” he groaned, hips jerking once, twice, his cock throbbing deep inside you as he spilled everything he had into you.

He held you down, buried deep, and you felt him throb inside you as he came—red-hot and thick, spilling into you with a groan that sounded like it cost him everything. His head dropped back, eyes squeezed shut, his entire body taut with the effort of staying in it until the end.

You rode it out together, bodies shaking, breath coming in shallow gasps. You collapsed onto his chest, limp and shaking, your heartbeat crashing in your ears. Sweat soaked the hollow of your back. You could feel his own heart thundering beneath your cheek—wild, irregular, but alive.

His arms slid around you—not tight, not strong—but present. Warm. His chest rose under you, then hitched once. A dry cough broke out, muffled against your temple.

He stayed there, head bowed against you, breath shallow.

And after a long moment, voice worn thin as paper, he said,

“You’re the only thing that makes me feel alive anymore.”

He didn’t say it like a gift. He said it like a confession.

Like it scared him more than the dying ever did.

You tipped your head closer, your voice steady when everything else felt like shaking.

“Then stay alive. For me. For as long as you can”

He didn’t answer. Just tightened his arms around you, fingers trembling where they held on.

And for a while, that was enough.

Seven months along, and you could still feel the weight of his hand on your belly like it had only just left.

Most nights, that memory was the only thing that kept you steady.

You'd learned how to move with the weight of him still inside you—not just the child, but the memory. The ghost of his voice, the echo of his laughter, the shape of his hands cupped over your belly like he could protect it, and you, from what was coming.

You knew the exact night the baby had happened.

Not just because of timing—but because everything about it had been different. No distance, no jokes, no walls between them. Just truth. Desperation. Love, raw and terrifying. He’d held you like he was trying to memorize you, whispered things he’d never dared say before.

You’re the only thing that makes me feel alive anymore.

And you’d told him to stay alive for you.

That was the night you'd made the baby. You were sure of it. The way he’d looked at you—like you were the only thing left in the world he couldn’t let go of.

He’d softened in a way you hadn’t thought possible, even as the light behind his eyes began to fade. At first, he’d joked—called you Mama, teased the child to come, offered names both ridiculous and oddly sentimental. But the jokes didn’t last. The coughing got worse. He slept more, ate less. You grew rounder, fuller with life, while he shrank into the bed like the world was letting go of him one piece at a time.

Still, he tried. He rubbed your back when the morning sickness took you under, kissed your neck with lips gone dry, told you you were brave even when he couldn’t lift his head. Once, in the dead of night, fever burning through him, he told you he wished he’d met you when he still had time to become the man you deserved. You held him through that too.

Near the end, words and wit came less often. But when you pressed his hand to your belly, he smiled—small and tired—and closed his eyes like he could feel the future.

“You’ll tell ‘em about me?” he’d rasped one evening.

You'd nodded, kissing his hand and blinking tears into his palm. “Every day.”

He left not but a few days later. No drama. No last gasp. Just a breath that didn’t return, and the sound of the wind outside like it was bowing its head.

The shame came soon after.

Unmarried. Alone. A woman with a swollen belly and no ring, no name but your own, and the memory of a dying man, whispered in your bones. They watched you pass in town—some with pity, others with tight-mouthed judgment. A gambler’s bastard, they said. A disgrace. A foolish girl who’d let love make you reckless.

Some nodded stiffly when you passed, like it pained them to acknowledge you at all. Others looked straight through you, eyes fixed ahead like you weren't even there. A few murmured your name in church, always just loud enough to be heard but never loud enough to offer comfort. No one said his name. Not in public. Not where it might stick to them. As if mourning a drunk gambler made you foolish.

But you kept walking. Chin up. Spine straight. Hand resting on the life inside you like it was the holiest thing you'd ever carried.

He’d asked you to live. To carry on.

And so you would.

You talked to the baby when it kicked, when it quieted. Told stories—about his sharp tongue and wicked grin, the way he held a pistol, the way he’d held you. You told it about the night the baby came to be. How he’d fallen apart in your arms and found something worth holding on to, if only for a little while.

Your house was quieter now. Lonelier. But when the wind rustled the curtains and the floor creaked just so, you liked to believe he was still here. Watching you. Walking beside you. Waiting for the child you made between heartbreak and hope.

You would see it through. For him. For what you’d made with him in the space between living and dying.

notes: AHHH @milesalexanderteller!!! I'm so sorry dude :'(

© Copyright, 2025.

[owlstro]

platonic Goob & Scraps x parent reader?

Bonus points if a small section is written when they were kids with a whole bunch of wholesomeness, if possible.

Ps: Love your writing!❤

GOOB & SCRAPS and PARENT READER , platonic

note: thank u for requesting and THANK U!! im glad ppl enjoy my writing hehs, this one's a little short too (i think) so apologies ^_^" hope u like this either way thoo!

art: @ kennicrispy on Pinterest!

First off, both of them are very clingy or at least when you're off to somewhere remotely dangerous, they'll most likely be there with you or begging you to stay

Goob would totally be the clingier one though, you know he's gonna run to you and tell about whatever happened in the run he was just in. Not before giving a big hug or if you're not a big fan of physical touch, give you a big greeting like shouting a "HI!!" or "HEY!!"

Scraps, although being the older sibling, would also do the same as Goob but VERY toned down. She doesn't want you to get overwhelmed.

She takes you to go draw with her all the time, Scraps wants to practice her skills so someday she can gift you a painting!

Goob does the same, taking you somewhere open but secluded to get used to his 'arms', he's mostly just hugging you though.

They both are independent Toons on their own but that doesn't mean they don't wanna be coddled by you every once and awhile. You did raise them after all!

Both probably like to cuddle a lot, especially before you or the crafts get chosen for a run, makes them forget the danger and risk of it.

Goob would totally pull you to machines, and even try to encourage you like Shelly does albeit, it doesn't really work but you appreciate the effort.

Scraps, while her ability isn't a huge support like Goobs. But she does help when she can, taking Twisteds off of you (even if you have lower stealth), giving you machines no matter how long she has been working on it for, .. the list goes on.

If you made some comment like "When you were ... I remember you did ..." Scraps would just groan in embarrassment and Goob would just awkwardly laugh.

Scraps would playfully insult you, nothing too serious. Like calling you old or something like that.

Goob gets insecure of his teeth sometimes, not always but it's always lingering in his mind especially when he was younger and/or if he had just been talking to Shrimpo. You make sure anything Shrimpo said isn't true and distract him.

You sneakily navigated the map, making sure no Toon sees or hears you. Glancing around the room, you concluded you were alone.

You sigh in relief, all of this running seriously tired you out. Oh, right.. What were you doing?

"AHA!" You heard a voice call out. "Found you!!" Footsteps were rapidly approaching, you better act quick or you're gonna get tagged!

You dodge Scraps' failed attempt to grapple onto you, running out of the room. Not caring to check if Goob was there camping the exit.

Seriously, one adult and two kids.. it wouldn't be hard to evade them you thought. But Goob is scarily fast not like Scraps but her tail came in handy.

Why'd you think this was a good idea? You've barely been running for a minute, you gotta impress your kids.

Lose or Win, at least survive a minute or two more!

You kept on dodging Goob and Scraps' 'attacks' and continued on running like your life depended on it. You raised them well, ..too well.

"I'm gonna get ya hehe!" You heard Goob shout.

Oh god, your legs are giving out. You turn right and hide behind a few boxes to regain your stamina. You notice on the corner of your eye Goob was swiftly approaching.

You reveal yourself to the fluffy craft, catching him off guard, you take that as your sign to continue running before-

"TAG!" Scraps suddenly appeared infront of the entrance and tagged you with her tail. "You're it!"

The room fell silent but quickly bursting into laughter. "I got you!" Scraps said, posing victoriously as Goob cheered his sister on.

You sighed and slowly sat down, panting. "Bravo Scraps.. You did well, you too Goob."

final note: theyr so silly.... i HEART goob and scraps!!!!!

[plasticfreckles]

🪶 early morning rookanis enjoy 🪶

Lucanis leaves the pantry to see Rook stumbling towards the stove, delightfully disheveled. Hair tumbling from her head in a middle part instead of swooped across her skull and down one shoulder, shirt umbuttoned lower than he dares to look.

Spite still points out the green and purple fabric of her breastband.

"Good morning." She jumps, suddenly, only barely keeps from spraining her ankle.

"Where did you come from?"

Lucanis points his thumb over his shoulder.

"The pantry. Like every morning." Rook huffs, runs both hands up her face and lightly pulls at the roots of her curls. "Short night?"

"My night was long enough," she starts, moving out of his way and leaning against the worktop, watching him light the fire in the oven. "Then I had the weirdest dream in a minute, right before waking up. Whatever rest I got - ruined."

"Want to talk about it? It'll take a while for the water to boil."

Rook rubs at her eyes.

"Dreamt Emmrich made me partake in some Fade magic or whatever but it backfired and I came out tall and skinny, but really disproportionate."

Came back wrong. Smells not right. Dry potsoil. Old, dry potsoil.

"Would.. would you not prefer to be tall and skinny?" Lucanis himself could surely do with a few more inches in the legs, on his bad days.

It dawns on him an instant too late, the way his question sounds, even to his own ears. But she's not offended. Far from it, actually.

"Are you kidding? Absolutely not. Have you seen my thighs?" Rook stands back up straight and cocks her hip. The high Crow boots and tight pants hug her curves enticingly. "Luscious, but spacially demanding."

A pause, as he crushes some coffee beans in a mortar. If he remembers his labels correctly, these beans will have a hint of chocolate flavor in them.

"Besides, people never think it's the short, fat elf who'll kill them." Lucanis snorts at that.

He pretends not to notice the way Rook's eyes linger on his forearm, the popping veins and the shifting muscles.

"Would you prefer to be taller?" Rook asks after a while.

"Sometimes. Though less because of the actual height and more because of the jokes." The noise out of her is knowing, familiar.

"Head taller than a cheese wheel." A phrase they both must have heard more times than they could care to count, judging by the familiarity in the way she quotes it. She moves away from the cooking corner, toward the cupboard around the stairs.

"How did you get into coffee?" She asks it as though it's a story she knows, and knows it well. So, as per usual, he deflects.

"How does anyone get into coffee? I imagine you told someone you were tired and they handed you a cup." Lucanis pauses, as he transfers the ground beans into a filterrag and secures it over the pot. "Only that it made you more tired."

She laughs, wiping out the two cups she chose with a dishrag.

"Accurate. Though the way you speak about coffee, it sounds like more of a revelation."

11 cups, Rook. Last night. ELEVEN. WE NEVER SLEEP AGAIN. STAY SUBDUED. STAY AWAKE. ALL THE SHITS.

"Our barista bought samples of all beans available in Treviso. Had me try them to find Caterina's favorite. I was fourteen. Didn't sleep for five days."

They're lucky she chose tin mugs. Her jaw drops, and so does her grip on the mug, and it falls loudly onto the tiles.

"One: you have a barista at home?!"

"Not anymore. Last I was there, I made my own coffee. The other staff don't get it right."

"The other staff?"

Lucanis shrugs, as he takes the kettle with an oven cloth and pours the hot water over the filterrag in slow, deliberate circles. The few memories he has of his parents, they waited on him hand and foot. After they were killed, and he went to live with Caterina, her staff.

"I'm sure your house has staff."

"Viago's the Talon, Lucanis. The Fledglings are his staff."

True point, he thinks. Viago has a tighter grip, more control over his underlings. So they don't get ideas. The reason he's constantly peddling with orphanages and whorehouses is that the moment a Fledgling even breathes wrong in his presence, they disappear. Myself is my true king, and he makes sure everyone knows it like the know the sun also rises.

"Two," she continues, either oblivious to secondary string of thought that always seems to run in the background no matter what or electing to ignore it. She has picked up the fallen mug and wipes it off yet again. "You drank every sample in one night?"

"The best beans at the time were from the Montilyet vineyard, surprisingly, crushed in a coarse herb mortar, run through alchemy water that's just about to boil. Press it onto this tiny metal sieve and pour the water as fast as you can without getting the grounds in your cup." During his youth, he drank that prep so often he can no longer think of it without recoiling. "I got so much done that week. And have no recollection of any of it."

She laughs. Holds both mugs as Lucanis transfers the ready coffee into their mugs. She already put creamer and a sugarstick into one of them.

"Sounds like you to remember the coffee and nothing else." The sugarstick serves as a spoon as she mixes creamer, coffee and the sugar falling off of it. "What's in this one?"

"If you believe me, the beans in Neve's pellet coffee before they abuse them beyond recognition. It's supposed to have a chocolate aftertaste."

She raises her eyebrows at him, lifting the cup to her lips.

"You think you can save that hogwash?" The expression on her face tells him there's no saving this. "Maybe the beans just suck."

"What can I say?" He takes a sip. Oh, dear. "If anyone can, it's me."

"Did Caterina like any of the samples you tried?"

"Of course not. She prefers tea over coffee. It was a lost cause."

Rook laughs so hard and sudden she inhales her swill. Spite laughs at the way it drips out of her nose.

🪶

i know bioware fixed that bug but idc if i saw it happen and they patched it its a dream now i dont make the rules

i still don't know how coffee works but I love some tevinter slander lmao

I'm trying to break out of the chronologic thing I had going with solavellan and just write what I feel like writing and its really cathartic ngl [also the way I finished my thesis and went straight back to creative writing for the first time in like FIVE YEARS lmao]

@lanafofana if you want me to tag u in ONLY what we talked about you gotta let me know lmao

@vespaer77 i forgot to tag u in my rookanis stuff and tbf I don't know if you WANT to be tagged in that but here u go haha

[~rina]

[goth-mami-writer]

☆Unbothered☆

~(Au) Leon Kennedy ×f!Reader drabble/work

POV: You and Leon are tired parents trying to get some ~time alone~ from household responsibilities and decide to try your hand at scheduled...😉.

~[Part 2 coming soon!]

☆

《 You lied there windedly in the bed beside Leon that night after your typical bedtime routine with your housefull. You were exhausted, and tonight, you just didn't get the few minutes you needed to unwind from the day. He had climbed under the covers beside you in the dark without a word, and you were almost thankful that he, too, was silent. The two of you had been married for 14 years this summer, and there was no doubt you were still in love. But having three children and a busy marriage was very changing for any relationship.

Your schedules were always clashing, and most of the time, you were always the coordinator of someone else's chaos. Between pediatrician appointments for your youngest who was a toddler, soccer practice for your son, orthodontist visits for your middle daughter - or Leon losing his watch and wallet for the fourth time that week-

You were exhausted.

Burnt out.

You often felt bad for Leon, too. His work kept him away from the kids most of the time, and they were always impatient to see him. He'd come home after three days, flown to a strange city, and would be greeted by a huddle of excitement that tugged at his waist first thing. There’d never not be a tiny voice ”daddy”-ing him. He was an amazing father, and of course, you were grateful. You just wished he wouldn't forget so much.

He sighed heavily with his face in his hands and he turned towards you in the bed to whisper in the silence of your room,

“What are we gonna do about Maya? Her braces are bothering her again.”

“On Friday, they should give her some stuff for pain at the orthodontist..” You whispered, closing your eyes to try and rest.

“Who's taking her to that?” Leon asked, clueless, and your eyes snapped open in disbelief. But not complete disbelief because he would often forget things much bigger than this.

You had told him three times before that he needed to take his daughter to that appointment on his lunch at work, and he suddenly snapped in the realization that he'd agreed to doing so already,

“Honey, I'm sorry, I can still take her. Are you taking Blake to soccer on-”

“Yes-” You said annoyedly, turning on your side away from him to try and get sleep, and his eyes narrowed to your snappy attitude all of the sudden.

“Alright, I'm just asking. Jesus.”

He turned on his other side, facing the opposite way in silence to get some sleep. You suddenly remembered something else on your schedule. You rose up in the bed, sitting on your elbows to tell him quietly over his shoulder before you forgot too,

“By the way, mom called. She's taking the kids upstate to Aunt Gretchen's this weekend for the holiday.”

Leon was silent in trying to remember who the hell your Aunt Gretchen even was, but he put that aside as he turned to face you, curious to the fact that this sounded like….a stress free weekend ahead?

“Is she taking the baby too?”

You nodded, saying that Aunt Gretchen hadn't seen the baby since you'd had him in the hospital a year ago. Leon looked around, almost wondering what a weekend being kid free would even feel like. Sure, Blake and Maya went to summer camp sometimes, but it wasn't always. He felt an idea beginning to settle into his mind, and he smiled, looking to you in the dark with a playful grin,

“Then, you wanna go out?”

You felt yourself turning over slowly because you knew exactly what he was insinuating and it in fact was not a romantic date night between you two, much to your disappointment and you asked suspiciously to weed out what he really meant,

“Go out… and do what? We can't book reservations this late. You hate the movies- I hate the movies so…”

“We could stay in?” He said smirking with dirty images floating in his head as he scooted a little closer to your side to try and act quietly persuasive,

“We can open up some wine and relax? Make something we haven't had in a while because the kids probably hate it. Lay in the bed …uninterrupted-”

“Leon-” You said, seeing through this with a straight face to remind him of the at least three other times that you both wanted to ‘just relax’,

“You get me pregnant again, I might go insane.”

It was true that your sex life was declining as you both matured. But due to the warmth of your marriage, it wasn't having a negative effect that you could notice. Although, both of you knew that your intimacy was in the graveyard at this point; spontaneous love making just wasn't a part of your routine anymore. Your kids were your world, but the time devoted to them was becoming a challenge.

He chuckled in defeat knowing you were too smart for his long monologue of what he had in mind for you two during your time alone. He nudged in closer to you, making you look away as he nuzzled into the curve of your neck,

“I'm just saying that it would be nice to spend some time with you, baby.”

“Don't ‘baby’ me.” You grumbled to make him stop sweet talking you like you were in your twenties again. Slowly, you felt as he began to lay on top of you, but you were more welcoming of his touch second by second. Finally, you melted and finally kissed him back, making him smile against your mouth in victory.

“We're tired parents, Leon. We get in this bed distraction free, and we'll end up just falling asleep.” You said during his kisses down your neck and across your chest.

He shook his head softly, trying to not get too imaginative but he mentioned with that sleepy gravel in his throat when he told you what his idea of the turnout might be once two tired parents finally get to mess around unbothered in the comfort of their own bed without having to worry about what time it was, if they were being too loud or who had work in the morning.

“I think we'll keep each other busy.”

You both slipped under the covers when Leon wrapped you around him, letting more of his weight sink into you as he kissed you deeply but you were awoken from this small daze of bliss by the crackling of the baby monitor when the baby began to stir from the nursery.

You sighed, unraveling away from him after knowing that you'd have to console the baby or else he'd cry all night. Leon laid on his side, watching you fan the blush away from your face sweetly but he mentioned quietly before you left to the nursery, pulling your arm gently to make sure you knew he wanted to add his own little activity to the list of things needing to be done this week

“Hey- you and me Saturday. Whatever we want, okay?”

You smiled but rolled your eyes, knowing that you had to give in when he spoke like this. You'd not had a date in forever and knew whatever you ended up doing, either in the bed or maybe wine drunk in the kitchen, would be special.

“I'll…put it on the calendar.” You said with a trusting smile before leaving to attend the baby.

You quietly hurried across the hall to answer the tiny cries but knew one thing for certain now that you wouldn't have Leon in eyesight, knowing that you were sharing the same dirty idea.

Uninterrupted sex sounded….fantastic.

But planning it like a PTA meeting sounded so strange. Although making things work when the schedule was so tight wasn't something you were unaccustomed to. You had been parenting for over a decade, after all.

What's the worst that could happen? 》

[niningtori]

see me | chapter four: together (final)

pairing: choi beomgyu x you

summary: after another failed relationship, you're ready to accept your fate as hopeless. choi beomgyu has other plans, though. or, beomgyu s your best friend's little brother and he's tired of you treating him like a kid.

genre: romance, angst, angst with a happy ending, best friend's brother au

word count: 3.4k (whoa)

notes: hi friends! happy easter to all who celebrate!! sorry this took me a bit to get out. i just love this story and this beomgyu so much i didn't want to rush it. i hope you're all satisfied with how this ends. see end of work for more notes :)

you're so out of it jia can't fucking take it anymore. 

"hello? come back to earth, please," she says, waving her hand in front of your face. "are you ever gonna tell me what the fuck happened with doyoon?"

it's been a few days since your return from the beach. suffice it to say, one painfully awkward drive was spent with you trying not to openly stare at beomgyu and him focusing intently on the scenery outside. 

you're actually a little surprised by her question. you genuinely haven't thought about your conversation with doyoon since you had it — you've simply been too preoccupied by the revelation that beomgyu has feelings for you.

"nothing much, really. he apologized to me and asked to get a drink sometime."

"what the fuck?! what did you say?!" 

"i said no," you reply simply. she's quiet for a moment before her face contorts into a deep frown.

"why do i get the feeling that that's not what's bothering you so much?" 

"because it's not," you admit with a sigh.

"then what is it? you've been weird ever since we got back."

you're torn for a while. how do you explain to your best friend that her kid brother is in love with you? or says he is, at least. 

"... it's about beomgyu. he—"

"oh, so he finally told you, huh?" she interrupts with a knowing look and you're absolutely flabbergasted.

"t-told me what?" you try feigning ignorance. maybe she's got it wrong?

"that he's been in love with you ever since he first saw you."

"how the fuck did you know that?!" you ask incredulously.

"you're my best friend and he's my brother. i know you two too well," she shrugs.

"so you knew this whole time and didn't tell me?" 

"well, to be honest, it was painfully obvious, but i didn't wanna embarrass either of you and it's, frankly, none of my business."

"i... wasn't he just drunk? i don't believe it…” you trail off.

"what do you mean?"

"i mean, he can't really mean it. he doesn't know what he wants. he's just a kid and—" 

"i'm going to stop you right there," she says sternly. "you may be oblivious, but don't you dare dismiss his feelings to make yourself feel comfortable. his feelings are real and he doesn't deserve to have you completely disregard them just because you can't face them." you flinch at her harshness.

"b-but he's never even hinted at it!" 

"never even hinted at it, my ass. that boy was all over you," she snorts. "did you really not notice anything this past week?" your eyebrows knit in confusion as you think back to all of the times the boy (man?) had interacted with you. suddenly, the unassuming touches and glances beomgyu shared with you hit you at a mile a minute. oh god, he was flirting? he was, wasn't he? and you just ruffled his hair and called him cute. 

but you're not done denying, denying, denying.

"i just don't understand. how could he like me when he's always with somebody new?"

"has it ever occurred to you that that's because he wants you to see him as a man and not the child you're so convinced he is?" you fall silent at this. no, it has never occurred to you, but now that she's said it, the puzzle pieces are starting to fit together in the most gut wrenching way.

"so he's been fucking around for years because he wants to prove something to me?"

"more or less, yeah." your head is spinning at this. so his feelings are sincere? 

"i... i don't know what to say."

"i figured you wouldn't," she hums.

"what do i do?" you ask with a newfound sense of panic. this is real. beomgyu actually love, loves you. 

"well, what do you want to do? it all depends on how you feel about him." 

"to be honest, i've never seen him as anything other than a brother," you sigh.

"and what about now?"

"i... i don't know. i'm just confused," you whine, digging your face into your hands and slightly tugging on your hair. when you think of the kiss you two shared, your heart skips a beat and butterflies arise in your stomach. well, that's new.

"honestly, i'll consider that progress. it's better than being brother-zoned." 

"jia!" you exclaim exasperatedly. "you're not helping. the boy i've thought of as a literal brother is in love with me and i've unknowingly treated him like shit for years." 

"yes, but i know and he knows that you didn’t mean it. look, even if you don't like him at all, don't you think he deserves a proper rejection at the very least?"

"you're right," you relent. "you’re always right.”

“well, i know,” she muses. “but before you decide anything, i want you to think about who’s been by your side all these years. when you didn’t have anyone else, who could you count on?”

“i —” you begin. 

“don’t answer yet. just think about it.” and think about it, you do.

-

the more time you’re left to think about what happened with him, the more confused you feel. beomgyu isn’t a child anymore, that much is clear, but does that mean you can undo the near decade of thinking of him as one? he’s handsome, sure, and that kiss nearly knocked you off of your feet, but can you really see him as a partner? as a man?

you’re not really sure. plus, what would happen if it didn’t work out? the choi’s are like family to you. they’re more of a family than your actual family ever was or ever will be. is it really worth gambling such an important piece of your heart for something that could easily end in heartbreak? but then, it’s broken, either way. can you really face the choi family again when you know beomgyu is in love with you and has been for such a long time? no, you can’t. not in good conscience. you’ve, intentionally or not, ignored beomgyu’s feelings for years now and you can’t ask him to bottle them back up for your own comfort.

you decide it's best to just talk to him. 

-

beomgyu doesn’t think that this is a good idea at all, actually. but his friends told him that rotting in his bed and crying like he has been for the past few days is even worse. when they put it like that, it didn't seem right to refuse their suggestion to have a double date with yeonjun. even still, he told them he wasn't ready to see someone new, but they said he was never seeing you in the first place. that sure shut him up. either way, it would be casual and yeonjun just needs a friend for his date's friend.

his "date" is nice enough, but she seems to have not gotten the memo that he's here as a wingman and not much else. she's trying to draw his attention by not-so-discreetly placing her hand on his thigh. gross. he genuinely thought about pretending to have a stomachache to cut the date short, but yeonjun had the bright idea of inviting the girls over after dinner. so now, as he sits on the couch of his and yeonjun’s shared apartment, he prays for god to intervene and end his suffering. 

a knock on the door pulls him out of his thoughts. please, god, let it be the maintenance man telling them they have to evacuate because of a gas leak. he almost jumps out of his seat to get to the door first, but yeonjun is closer and he says he’ll get it. fuck. before he can catch a glimpse of the mystery person at the door, his date speaks again.

“gyu?” the girl asks tentatively.

“mmm?” he says, turning back around to face her.

“do you like me?” she says while, once again, putting her hand on his thigh. alright. enough is enough. usually, he would tell her to beat it and leave it at that, but ever since you told him he doesn’t treat girls the nicest, he’s decided he’ll try to be better. he takes her hand from his lap into his and opts to just be truthful. 

“to be honest, i —” 

“beomie?”

oh, he’d recognize that voice anywhere, even in his sleep. his head whips around almost comically fast and he unintentionally yanks his hand from his date's as he stands straight up.

“w-what are you doing here?” he asks, incredibly flustered.

you should say something, but your eyes can’t help but linger where his hand was joined with the hand of the very lovely girl sitting beside him, even after he’s pulled away. oh my god. you’re interrupting, aren’t you? he’s moved on, but you’re standing there like an idiot. you need to say something. 

“i-i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to intrude,” you choke out. you don’t know why, but you feel like you’re about to cry. you feel so embarrassed. why did you even for a second think that this would play out any differently? 

“everybody out,” beomgyu says firmly. 

“what?” his date asks, genuinely in shock.

“i said, everybody else needs to get out of here. right now. besides you,” he says while gesturing to your pitiful frame.

“gyu, i live here,” yeonjun argues.

“out,” beomgyu repeats. yeonjun lifts his hands in surrender and leads the bewildered girls out of the apartment. 

now it's just you and beomgyu.

after the door shuts, the silence is as unbearable as it is palpable. beomgyu is staring at you with the same intensity as he was the night he confessed to you. you feel so vulnerable — so seen — you honestly kind of wish you had just snuck out with everyone else. 

“beomie, i’m so, so sorry. i didn’t mean to ruin your date. i can go, i just —” 

“do you know what i've noticed about you?” he quietly interrupts. you’re so taken aback, you’re stunned into silence. he sighs before he continues. “the way you say things are okay when someone fucks you over. it’s okay to be mad at me, you know?” 

“beomie, i’m not mad!” you insist. “you’re single, after all. i’m the one who —”

“i’m single, but i still told you i loved you a few days ago. why wouldn’t you be hurt?” once again, you’re left speechless at his maturity. when did he become more mature than you? or was he always this way, and you just never noticed?

“or is it that you just don’t care enough about me to be upset?” he's the one who looks small now and you worry you have the power to break him. he deserves an honest answer, so you think about how you felt when you saw his hand intertwined with that girl’s and your heart feels a nasty pang. 

“i… i am upset,” you pause and process that ugly feeling. “really upset, actually. but not angry.”

“i’m sorry,” he says, not without conviction. “yeonjun needed a date for his date’s friend, and i planned on rejecting her, but i’m really sorry i hurt you.” 

“... it’s alright,” you say carefully. “i understand. and i still think you don’t owe me anything, beomie.”

“but i want to owe you,” he says quietly.

“what do you mean?” you can’t help but ask. 

“i want to owe you. i want to make it up to you, and i want you to make it up to me.” you think you understand what he means. he wants you to make it up to him for not seeing him as he truly is all these years, but you just can’t understand his thinking.

“why?” you ask softly.

“why would you ask when you already know why?” he answers quietly with a sad smile. because he loves you.

“but why? why do you like me? you could have anyone. i’m wishy washy, i’m insecure. i’m just a mess, beomie. and i don’t want you to waste your time with me.” you hate the way your voice shakes. you wish, for once in your life, that you could be brave enough to say what you need to say without hesitating. you feel as small as a child, and in front of beomgyu of all people. but the dynamic you’ve always thought you had is becoming more and more twisted as you realize you’ve been very, very wrong about him, and maybe about yourself, too. beomgyu is not some kid. his feelings are not so easily written off, and that becomes even clearer when he says his next words in a haste. 

“don’t talk about yourself like that,” he says sharply, and his seriousness immediately derails your train of thought. “i’m not looking for anybody else. i… i don’t want anybody else. and i would never, ever feel like my time is wasted with you. every moment i spend with you is important to me.” you don’t mean for your eyes to get hot. truly, you don’t, but the boy’s words are so kind you’re unable to control yourself. 

“you really love me?” you ask at the risk of seeming annoying. you just have to be sure. 

“i do,” he says patiently. “i always have.” he isn’t sure what to make of you asking this. he has no hope now, but if it makes you feel better to hear him say he loves you a million times over, so be it. you’ve been hurt enough all your life, from your parents to your partners, if he’s able to comfort you even just a little bit, even if it’s never reciprocated, it’s enough for him. so he continues. 

“i’m… i’ve always thought about how to say this, so i’m sorry if it’s just too much for you. if it is, then just stop me, okay?” you can’t help but nod. “i just have to say that, to me, you are the most beautiful person in the world. i’ve wanted to tell you that since i was 14. i know you’re sad and i know you’ve been hurt before, and i wish i could take it all away. i’ve always wished i could take it all away. i know you think you deserve everything that’s happened to you so far, but i want you to know that that's not true, and it kills me that you’ve ever felt that way. i love everything you say you hate about yourself, because you’re you. i know you want to change, and i want you to know that i see how hard you’re trying. those flaws that make you a mess, or however you put it, only make me love you more because i can see how hard you’ve worked to get where you are. and if you don’t love me, even if you never do, that’s… it's okay. i just want you to be happy. and if i can be selfish, i want to be the one who helps you get there.” 

you don’t try to stifle your tears anymore. they are now flowing freely and your breath is heavy in your throat. he understands you. he sees you for everything that you are and were, and everything that you’re trying to be. has anyone ever made you feel this safe before? has anyone ever made you feel this loved and understood? 

you think back to what jia asked. when you didn’t have anyone else, who could you count on? if you didn’t trust any man in the world, you could trust beomgyu. that’s just how it is. you realize, even from the first night you met him, you’ve always been relying on him, in a way. why else would you feel so comfortable telling him about your anxieties mere hours after you spoke to him for the first time? 

things were one way then, but they could be different now. beomgyu loves you in a way that previously seemed inconceivable to you. what did you do to deserve this boy — this man? not a fucking thing, in your opinion, but now that you know how he really feels, is it possible to accept anything less than the love he is now presenting to you? maybe he’ll wake up one day and regret everything he’s said up until now, but you’re far too selfish to give up the heart he’s begging for you to take as your own.

you don’t know why, but you fling yourself into his arms, reminiscent of how you did all those years ago when he was just a teenage boy and you were just a heartbroken girl. he holds you like he did before, with an overwhelming sense of patience and security. he traces his hands lovingly up and down your back. 

“okay. okay, i want to try. i can’t promise that i’ll be perfect, i can’t even promise to be good, but i’ll try, okay? you’re so, so good, beomie. and i'm sorry for not realizing it sooner.”

he pulls away from your embrace and your cheeks feel hot when you catch his heated gaze. he looks down at you and if his look wasn’t enough, his next words certainly are:

“can i kiss you?”

“yes, beomie,” you whisper. 

"call me gyu," he says hoarsely. you gulp and pray he doesn't hear it.

he softly, reverently, pushes your stray hairs behind your ears and you realize he’s done so many times before. mainly when you were sad, but this time is… different. when his lips lock with yours, you're stunned into oblivion. there's so much fire behind it, but still, there’s a gentleness you’ve never known. as if he’s afraid of breaking you, he holds you like you’re a precious gem. usually, kisses are take take take from you, but he gives you so much love and care you feel like you’re floating. is this what love is supposed to feel like? so safe and so, so warm? 

he parts from you far too soon for your liking. his breath is labored and his cheeks are flushed. you look at him in confusion.

“i-i’m sorry, i just can't. if we keep going, i won't be able to control myself. i'm gonna —” 

“it's okay, gyu,” you whisper. “we can keep going.” he understands what you mean without you having to say anything more.

“are you sure?” he asks, just to be safe.

“i'm sure,” you answer without missing a beat. his lips curl up and he leads you to his bedroom, hand holding yours so tightly, it’s almost like he’s afraid to lose you.

-

the night is spent with beomgyu praising you like he’s never seen anything quite like you before. you feel his devotion with every passing moment and you can’t believe this is what you’ve been missing all these years. you’ve never felt so good, so cared for, in all your life. when you’re finished, and he’s cradling you in his arms, you’re both struggling to catch your breath. he looks at you like you hung the moon, but what you don’t know is that you’re starting look at him like that, too.

-

you’re so anxious. as you pull up to the choi’s family home in the passenger’s seat of beomgyu’s car, you can’t help but wring your hands together. this could be very good, or very, very bad. you can’t help but feel like you’re… betraying? the choi family by dating beomgyu. they’ve taken you in as family, but you’ve taken beomgyu as your own. do you regret that decision? well, you can’t say you do when beomgyu grabs your restless hands and comfortingly squeezes them before telling you “hey, it’s alright. don’t be nervous. i love you. they love you. everyone here loves you. just be yourself and i’ll take care of the rest, okay?” 

“okay,” you say shyly. you and beomgyu have been working on your self esteem. it was pretty slow going at first, but you’ve been pushing through. now, after three months, you’re a lot better, but there’s still room for improvement. beomgyu is nothing if not patient, though. after all, he’s been waiting for 8 years. how could he not be? and so he patiently coaxes you out of the car and into the house.

you two find your way inside and are greeted by his parents, jia, and yijun. nobody bats an eye at you two walking in together — they just greet and hug you as per usual, but their smiles drop and their faces turn serious when beomgyu announces he has something to tell everyone.

“guys, uh, we have something to tell you all,” he says, lacing his fingers with yours, “we’re together now.” you could hear a pin drop with how quiet the room is. mrs. choi is the first to break the silence.

“h-how long? how long has this been going on?” 

“three months,” he says cautiously. again, the room is silent.

“... only three? damn it!” mr. choi exclaims.

“i told you guys it hasn’t been very long,” jia sneers. “now pay up.” beomgyu’s parents grimace while pulling out their wallets and stuffing cash in jia’s hands.  

“pleasure doing business with you,” she teases with a shit-eating grin.

“um, guys? what’s going on? i’m kind of pouring my heart out over here,” beomgyu says irritatedly. 

“oh, honey. we know. we’ve known you liked her since she first stepped foot into our home. she was the only one who didn’t,” mrs. choi replies with a wave of her hand and your cheeks can’t help but heat up to an impossible degree. beomgyu finally pieces everything together while you’re still scrambling to understand what’s going on.

“oh my god, did you all make a bet to see how long it’d take for us to get together?!” beomgyu exclaims.

“more or less,” mr. choi says nonchalantly. realistically speaking, you and beomgyu should be angry, but all you two can do when you lock eyes with each other is laugh. 

“so you’re okay with it?” you ask meekly.

“of course we are!” mrs. choi says. “we couldn’t ask for a better match for our boy. we were just waiting for you to see that, too.” you can’t help but feel your eyes go sour. you hug his parents and they rub your hair. why would you think they’d do anything other than accept you? they always have.

that night, after all the board games and movies and laughter, you go out for some fresh air. you aren’t surprised in the slightest to see beomgyu sitting on the back porch steps, almost as if he’s been waiting for you. 

“there you are,” beomgyu says with a grin blooming on his face. you sit next to him, so close your thighs are touching. you lean your head against his shoulder and you sigh in contentment.

“that wasn’t so bad, was it?” he asks.

“not at all,” you smile, “but did everyone in the world know about us besides me?”

“pretty much, yeah,” he giggles and you playfully smack his chest. after your laughter dies down, beomgyu senses some hesitation from you. it feels like you want to say something to him.

“what is it?” he asks. you pull away from him and stare into his eyes. they look especially starry tonight.

“i have to tell you something,” you say, voice trembling slightly.

“mhm?” he nods.

“i think… actually, i know i love you, gyu. and i’m sorry it took me so long to get here, but i really do.” your eyes water when you see beomgyu’s doing the same. he looks so relieved, as if your words in particular are the ones he’s been waiting for all his life. and they are.

“i love you, too, if you haven’t guessed that already,” he says softly. “and i’d do everything all over again if it meant i’d get to be with you like this.” his eyes close and he leans in. you meet him halfway and press your lips together in a chaste kiss.

notes pt. 2: and that's it for them! i actually wrote a bit of smut for this, but i don't think it'll ever see the light of day i fear. as always, feedback is appreciated! i'd love to know what you all think :)

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