#and so excited to stop hyperfocusing on finishing this so i can do the dishes for the first time in days

[artielotl]

autumn on the river fillan

2024, 12 count aida cross stitch, 12"×16"

[beyondthebarrier]

Starker Festivals Summer Bingo

Prompt: Didn't Know They Were Dating | Title: Rising to the Occasion | Ao3

Summary: The media seems to think that Tony and Peter are dating. In fact, so does Rhodey. And Aunt May. And the team...

Don't worry. Tony sets the story straight.

This is my first proper Starker fic so bear with me!

It wasn’t abnormal for Peter to be alone when he woke up, if he was being honest. Tony was rarely still in bed in the mornings, presumably quick to dismiss himself from the actions of the night before. Peter never minded, usually always able to find the man elbows deep in some project that he might be able to pick the genius’ brain about.

“FRI, can you start me some coffee?” Peter asked quietly, his voice a little raspy from sleep.

“Of course. Good morning, Peter.”

“Good morning, FRIDAY.”

Peter got to his feet, finding his sweatpants from the day before and Tony’s discarded Black Sabbath shirt before making his way directly to the kitchen for the promised cup of coffee. It took a few sips for him to realize that he heard voices coming from the living room - he’d assumed he was the only one in the penthouse. He recognized the second voice easily though so he wasn’t shy about heading that way.

“Look who’s awake,” Tony announced with a smile when Peter and his bedhead popped up in the open door frame. Rhodey looked his way and Peter waved around his coffee mug.

“Hope you’re here on your own accord and not because he dragged you for some nonsense, Colonel,” Peter greeted with a smirk towards the man in question.

“I’m not here for damage control this time, miraculously,” Rhodey replied easily, chuckling.

“In that case, I’ll leave you two to it. Tones, I’m gonna shower and head downstairs. It was good to see you, Colonel!”

As Peter made his way back towards the bedroom, Rhodey looked over at Tony and sighed at the look on the billionaire’s face.

“He looks good on you, Tony.”

--

“Here, May, I’ve got it,” Tony swooped in, grabbing the woman’s empty plate before she could fully get to her feet. Peter rolled his eyes but stood as well, his own empty plate in hand.

“I don’t know what you’ve done to him,” Peter started, exasperated. “This man would rather buy new dishes than wash them at his own house and then he sits here and readily offers when we’re over here. Please, I need to know your secret. I’m tired of coffee rings in all the mugs.”

“Oh it’s easy, Peter. He’s scared of me,” Aunt May said in a faux whisper, winking at Tony before she settled on her sofa with the rest of her glass of wine as the boys worked to clean the kitchen. Tony washed while Peter absentmindedly dried and put away dishes, chatting away quietly to the older man. When Peter turned back to face the man, Tony quickly smeared soap bubbles onto Peter’s cheek, grinning. With a laugh, Peter reached into the sink, splashing the man with the water in the sink, despite the expensive suit Tony was wearing. Tony didn’t seem bothered as he grabbed the young man around the waist and pulled him in close for a hug, getting him wet as well. Peter squeaked, making Tony lean his head back in laughter before kissing Peter’s forehead and letting him go. Only Tony noticed the look that May was giving them both and he just smiled before turning back to finish cleaning.

As they left, Aunt May wrapped both men in crushing hugs to say goodbye. As Tony helped Peter into his jacket, he looked over his head at the woman, smiling.

“It’s our turn next Sunday, May. Be at the penthouse at seven.”

--

“I thought the little spider was supposed to be here? I brought ale for him to try!” Thor announced, holding up a large jug full of… well, not even Tony was eager to try the liquid sloshing around. Peter had been excited with the prospect of an alcohol that would give him the proper effects but Thor was right - Peter was nowhere to be found.

“Maybe he’s just running late,” Tony replied with a casual shrug, even as he slid his phone out to send yet another text to the missing member of the team. It was meant to be a little game/movie night and Peter was usually the one coercing him into attending so his lack of punctuality was bothering Tony. However, it wasn’t until Natasha and Steve also pointed out Peter’s absence that Tony excused himself. They weren’t sure exactly where he was going until they saw the suit fly off from the landing deck, heading in the direction of a shitty little apartment in Queens.

When Peter didn’t answer the door, Tony let himself in with his key, calling out Peter’s name frantically. It was a studio apartment and Peter groggily sat up in bed, blinking at the man who had just rudely interrupted his sleep.

“Pete, there you are. You’re missing game night, why are you- You’re burning up, sweetheart!” Tony sat on the edge of the bed, the back of his hand pressing against Peter’s forehead.

“M’cold,” Peter mumbled, trying to wrap the blankets around himself again so he could lay down.

“When’s the last time you’ve eaten?”

“Not hungry..”

“Okay, you’re definitely sick,” Tony pointed out, jumping to his feet to search the kitchen for food. Peter spent so little time here now that the cabinets were practically barren. There was certainly no cans of soup or really… anything. With a wince, Tony reached for a half-empty jar of peanut butter and a spoon, heading back to the bed.

“Tones, m’not hungry,” Peter whined as he scooped peanut butter out of the jar.

“Sweetheart, you need calories. Just a little bit and some water and I’ll let you go back to sleep. Your body will kick this in no time but it needs fuel to do it,” Tony said firmly, lifting the spoon to Peter’s lips. He opened them, accepting the spoon reluctantly and smacking his lips as he tried to get the peanut butter down. Tony got up, fixing him a cup of water. Between the two of them, they painstakingly got a full eight ounces of water and four big spoonfuls of peanut butter into the enhanced man before Peter gave up, flopping back into the pillows.

“Are you going back to game night?” he asked Tony, a rather pitiful look on his face. Tony shook his head, laying down beside him and wrapping his arms around him.

“No, I’m not going anywhere. Go back to sleep, I’ll be right here,” he assured, running his fingers through Peter’s sweaty curls and kissing his forehead.

--

Peter had decided to leave the tower for his lunch break, the idea of a sandwich from the deli down the block on his mind all morning. It was a beautiful day and he’d been looking for an empty space on a bench when he noticed the pointing in his direction from a few people by a magazine stand. He glanced down at himself, trying to see if maybe his shirt had come untucked or he had trash trailing on his shoe but he didn’t spot anything. However, he did hear the words, ‘Tony Stark’s boyfriend’ come from someone’s mouth and his stomach immediately twisted. He couldn’t stop himself from going over to the stand, dreading the idea of seeing Tony’s smiling face on a magazine cover with some- Oh. It was him. Peter laughed, picking up the glossy booklet. They’d attended a gala on Saturday evening for SI and the photo on the cover was the two of them all dressed up and smiling at each other in front of some rose bushes. ‘Tony Stark and boyfriend, Peter Parker, Rose to the Occasion.’ Peter scoffed at the title, setting it back down and reaching for his phone. He wasn’t sure Tony would find it as amusing as he did but he was just relieved that it hadn’t been someone else on that cover.

Thankfully, Tony didn’t seem bothered in the slightest. He had already known about it, getting the alert from PR hours before, and even seemed a little concerned that Peter might be upset about it.

“Do you want me to put out a statement about it?” Tony asked him over the phone, as if sensing Peter’s slight discomfort.

“You won’t be rude about it or anything, right? Just clarify, sweet and simple?” Peter asked, noticing that he was still garnering a bit of attention. Thankfully, New Yorkers themselves were usually nonchalant about that kind of thing so it was only the tourists that were trying to draw attention to him.

“Of course. I’ll get it out right away,” Tony assured him.

Peter had no reason not to believe him. He thanked him, hung up, and moved further away from the news stand. He muted his phone before digging into his sandwich, taking advantage of the rest of his lunch break before heading back to work. It wasn’t until he was in the elevator going back up to R&D that he noticed his phone was blowing up. He sighed, expecting a tweet or something from Tony laying out the truth but what he found caught him off guard.

Relationship. Tony said relationship. He hadn’t claimed that they were just friends or fuck buddies or whatever. He said relationship. Peter was so hyperfocused on the words that the next thing he registered was FRIDAY’s voice.

“Mr. Parker? Mr. Parker, are you alright? Your vitals are concerning, should I alert Mr. Stark? ..Peter?”

“No! No, FRIDAY, no, don’t alert him, I’m fine!” Peter scrambled to answer, glancing up to see what floor the elevator was at currently. “Please don’t. I’m fine. I’m answering you, I’m fine!”

FRIDAY reluctantly agreed not to tattle just as the elevator stopped at his floor. Peter wasn’t feeling very fine, despite his protests, as he stepped out. He expected lots of stares and whispers, perhaps even direct comments about him ‘dating the boss.’ But there was nothing. Either nobody here had seen it yet or they just didn’t care. That certainly helped matters as he made his way to his table, intending on trying to focus on work but finding himself scrolling through the comments on the post instead. It was full of congratulatory messages from strangers but their friends didn’t seem very surprised. Rhodey, Nat, Ned, even Steve commented, all seeming as if this was barely news to them.

Peter got to his feet, heading back to the elevator to get to Tony’s lab. As the doors slid open on Tony’s R&D floor, Tony was standing there waiting to get on. The man flashed him his signature smile, stepping aside so he could get out.

“I was just coming to see you. May texted, said you seemed a bit out of it. Are you okay? I know the attention can be a lot but if I repeatedly make it clear that I want your privacy to be respected, it shouldn’t get too bad. Trust me, the fangirls will go rabid when reporters get too in-your-face about something,” Tony explained, leading Peter towards his office. Peter didn’t respond, staring straight ahead as Tony closed the door behind them. “They’ll want to protect you at all costs,” Tony continued, heading for the sofa instead of his chair. Peter remained standing, still just staring. Tony finally realized something was up and quirked an eyebrow at him, curious. “Pete?”

“Boyfriend.” Peter said blankly, staring at the man.

“Um, yes? I also have a name you can address me by.”

“Boyfriend.”

“Oookay, that works too. Peter, what’s wrong?”

The younger man started pacing the length of the office and Tony sighed, covering his face with his hands for a moment before regaining composure.

“FRIDAY, diagnose him. Fever? Has he been drugged? Is he having a psychotic break?”

“Sir, it appears that Peter is in a state of shock,” FRI replied easily. “His heart rate is elevated but nothing to be concerned about.”

“Shock over what?” Tony asked, watching as his partner continued to pace. He could practically see the gears turning in the boy’s head.

“It seems that Peter was not aware that the two of you were dating, Sir.”

Tony let out a humorless laugh while Peter came to a halt, his cheeks tinting pink as he stared at the floor. Realizing that there may be some truth in what FRI was telling him, Tony got to his feet, carefully approaching Peter.

“She’s right, isn’t she?” He asked softly, frown lines deeply engraved into his forehead. Peter refused to respond, not even looking up. Tony sighed, cupping the man’s chin and gently lifting it. “Pete? Is she right?”

Instead of answering, Peter’s face crumpled.

“I’m so sorry,” he mumbled, hiding his face in his hands. Tony immediately pulled him into his chest, wrapping his arms around him securely. “I didn’t know that’s what this was.”

“That means I fucked up somewhere, Peter. Not you,” Tony soothed, rubbing the boy’s back. “If it had just been sex, I could understand, but Pete, sweetheart. I go to Sunday dinners with your Aunt. I host Sunday dinners for your Aunt. I take care of you when you’re sick, I let you wear my clothes.. Baby, we practically live together.”

“You never asked! You never used the words dating or boyfriend or-or-or relationship or anything,” Peter defended, lifting his head to look at the older man.

“Eight months ago, we laid in bed and I told you that I never wanted this to end. That I wanted forever with you,” Tony explained. “You agreed. I thought we were pretty clear from there on.”

“I thought that was pillow talk!” Peter exclaimed. “I’m so angry right now that it’s not even funny.”

Tony frowned once more, immediately letting Peter go and holding his hands up in surrender.

“Angry? You’re angry that I thought we were dating?”

“I’m angry that I’ve been holding back for eight months because I thought I wasn’t allowed to have you! I don’t kiss you first or touch you first or cuddle you whenever I want because I didn’t want to be too much for you!”

Tony’s face broke out into a grin, seeming relieved.

“Well, let’s rectify that right away.”

[yeeiguess]

List of things I do that I can’t tell if they’re normal or if it’s ADHD/ADD/something else (very long, non-exhaustive list)

- If i take a pause in reading/watching something the emotional connection I get with it just disappear. I remeber i loved seeing it, but can’t feel it

- Can’t finish a movie unless I’m with something else. Can’t focus for that long ?

- Rarely finishes any series, actually

- Constantly tired

- Taking Vitamin C to give me a boost of energy doesn’t seem to work

- If I’m doing something boring or difficult I can’t concentrate. Anything distracts me

- I’ve been eating my nails and the skin around them forever. Not because I’m stressed, I just do it. Tried to stop but it didn’t last long

- Have to write down what I have to do in a day or I forget

- Forgets appointments, names etc unless I write them down

- Often forget what I was going to say, and if we’re in a conversation and the other person is talking even more. I don’t want to interrupt so I keep it in and then I forget because I can’t focus on two things at the same time

- Can’t tell if i take a normal time to fall asleep or if it’s long (between 45 minutes and an hour+ depending on how early I go to bed and how tired I am)

- Mimicking people’s movements if they do it repeatedly

- No notion of space or time. I can remember point A and point B but the road between the two, I can’t. Can’t tell you how long ago I did this or that, what I ate yesterday, which month I did X thing

- numbers are difficult. I need precise, step by step explaination of how to resolve math problems, most of it doesn’t make sense and I have a hard time remember which numbers comes after the other + how to say it (around 60-100 because french decided 70s and 90s needed to be Said and Written the dumbest way ever). When resolving simple things like 7+6 I do 7+7=14 / 14-1=6. I know 7+7=14 so I start from there. My mom does the same kind of things but she has dyslexia/dyslcalculia etc

- I’m always early and if it’s a place I don’t know I’m always scared I got to the wrong place or ay the wrong time and I need to check multiple time if the person I’m meeting isn’t here yet

- I don’t think it’s hyperfocusing but I spend a lot of time just imagining stories in my head with my favourite characters. I act them out when I’m alone, and sometimes stop what I’m doing just to think. I read a LOT of fanfics (but can’t read a book) and do a lot of fanart

- Doesn’t happen that often but object permanence being like nope (aka looking for something I just put down for an awefully long time. Mostly my glasses. Which sucks because I CAN’T SEE WITHOUT THEM)

- sometimes I get Intense Brain Fog and to read a sentence I need to read every word multiple times one after the other, out loud, until I can get an image of what it means. Sucks when it happens in philosophy class and I have two pages to read oops

- I’m slow. Like slow walker, slow to understand... it makes me feel stupid sometimes

- I can’t get up right after eating, I need some time before I can clean my things, out the dishes in the dishwasher etc... especially at night

- If there’s music, I dance. If I know the lyrics, I mouth them. Wherever I am, whatever the music is, at any given moment.

- When I’m tired I get hyper and excited and I’m terribly annoying but I just. Makes sound and move a lot until I’m REALLY exhausted and every movements is difficult

- Bouncy leg has been here for forever. Sometimes it’s BOTH legs and stopping is hard

- I’m a mess but I like symmetrical things and putting things on their correct places in stores. Can’t see the color of my desk tho

- I fucked up my sleep schedule in middle school and now if I got to bed too early I wake up tired af

- I’m impulsive af but also if I have a project to do I like to know every important step so I don’t mess up

- « I know I have to do that but I have no energy right now » procrastinator forever

- Literally just forgot what I thought of

- Okay no I got it- sometimes I get Thoughts that just don’t go away. Often it’s me repeating the way someone misgendered me, or my birthname i just heard and I have to mentally scream to cover the thought. It sucks

- If i have a phone call, a meeting, an appointment during the day. I can’t do anything but wait for it. No matter how long it’ll be until it’s time to go or see the person i start things and I get nervous so I stop and I just. Wait.

- I used to tell myself I didn’t exist, sometimes. It was a comforting thing, because not existing meant I couldn’t hurt, couldn’t hate myself or struggle with things like gender and names and dad. I haven’t done it in months tho !

Édit : i can’t understand why so many people reblog this without giving me any answer or any question or anything ?? What’s the- why do you reblog this

[skullvis]

I’m trying to determine if I have adhd because SOOOO much of what I’ve seen described on here is stuff that I relate to on a very deep level-like at this point even if I don’t have it, I still feel like I at least need help dealing with some of this stuff cause I can’t seem to break the habit of some of these things, I’m making this list mostly for my own record so that I can refer back to it if I get counseling—

Keeping my space clean-I’ll drop stuff on the floor as soon as I get home, always telling myself I’ll clean it up “a little later”. A month later the stuff is still there and hasn’t been touched, and there’s a good chance there’s more stuff that’s been added to it. Same thing happens with kitchen stuff. I’ll put dishes in the sink and then ignore them until they literally become a disgusting moldy mess. Then I finally clean them but feel guilt for letting it get that bad in the first place.

Procrastinating-I procrastinate on things I need to get done, sometimes for days/weeks/months if possible. Then I feel guilty for procrastincating and rush to get everything done at once, which often makes me super stressed or causes me to breakdown.

Hyperfocusing (?)-I’m gonna call this hyperfocusing cause I don’t know what else it could be. Ever since I was small, if I find something I like, I focus on it for YEARS and it becomes my favorite thing. When I was younger it was mostly cartoons like Pokémon, Power Puff Girls and Jackie Chan Adventures, and then I graduated to Naruto and anime in general. The other side of this was me getting extremely focused on doing things like drawing/playing video games. To this day if I start a drawing and “get in the groove” while making it, I can’t stop until I’ve finished it, even if I need to go to the bathroom/take a shower/eat, I’ll keep drawing. This also happens with puzzle games and video games in general. I often lose sleep because of this, even when I plan to or want to go to bed early. I keep telling myself “just 10 minutes more” until suddenly it’s 1:30 am and I have to work tomorrow at 8.

Volume control- I don’t think this is a thing that happens with everyone and am not even sure it is connected with adhd at all, but I’ve always had a really hard time realizing how loud my voice is. When I was a kid my mom would constantly tell me “inside voice!” and even now my friends often tell me “you don’t have to shout” when I didn’t even realize I was shouting. This happens the most when I’m excited or happy about something. It kinda sucks because it’s something I’ve become very self-conscious about and usually feel bad when someone tells me to be quieter

Stimming (?) -I don’t know what else to call this, so if it’s a word only for autistic people to use please let me know. When I am especially anxious or my anxiety is triggered, I tap on things, to mimic “knocking on wood”. I’ll tap on anything but if there IS a wooden surface available I prefer to use it. I have to knock 12 times twice and then knock 24 times. Alternatively if I lose count I can stop at 33 and if I space out and miss 33 then I have to go to 50. I usually don’t space out at 50 but if I do then I’ll go to 100. This usually calms me down, but I will also repeat the pattern for a while if I think it’s necessary.

Time Management- I have a difficult time managing my time (lol) Its not unusually for me to be late or, extremely early. I often misjudge how long it will take me to do a task or get someplace. Or I forget to factor in certain things like the time it will take me to get from my room to the car, or the possibility of there being traffic/red lights. Taking tests was difficult if it was a subject I wasn’t good at, because I often felt like I didn’t have enough time to work on certain problems.

Thoughts Gone Fucking BONKERS- I have a really hard time with overthinking things. I overthink things pretty much constantly. While this can be a good thing-thinking about story ideas or character designs or fun stuff is nice cause I can keep thinking of new concepts or ideas for a long time- if I get focused on a negative or upsetting thought, it can stick with me for years and affect my daily life by making me anxious. I often lay in bed at night just trying to quiet my mind so I can get some dang sleep, and if I’m thinking hard enough about something I will actually not hear when people are talking to me.

Collecting/Hoarding- I can’t remember exactly if this is something that actually coincides with adhd, but I collect shit like crazy and have a VERY hard time letting stuff go. I don’t know if Marie Kondo would be able to help me because EVERYTHING sparks joy in me, and so how could I get rid of anything? I have stacks of little papers and postcards and movie tickets at my house because I tell myself I’ll use them to decorate the walls but usually they just end up in a pile of stuff I forget about.

Misreading/Mispronouncing/Skipping words when writing- I don’t have dyslexia, and learned to read easily enough, but I often misread words entirely or skip words when writing things and then don’t notice till later.

These are just some things I wanted to make note of. I am planning on talking to a counselor/psychiatrist when I get home, and want to have an organized-ish list of stuff that I feel is relevant so I don’t forget everything.