#and shes like I WAS A YOGA TEACHER I CANNOT POSSIBLY HAVE THOSE

[ichaserabbits]

I had a yoga teacher in a class tell me that stretching your lower back and hips causes your liver to release all the "emotion chemicals" it stores and that it's okay to cry in class and then get like mad when stretching didn't make me inconsolable ???

I had to be like Miss I don't think that's how your liver works ?

obsessed with the girl who says that if you lie on the floor long enough you will start to cry and shake because your body is 'releasing excess cortisol' like i just think you might be going through something girl

[greensydney]

Wellness Segments from The Friend Zone Podcast

This is where I’ll be listing Fran’s Wellness Segments. It will be updated regularly. Any specific products/stores mentioned will be linked :)

Ep. 1: It’s Ok to Log Off  

Being the first episode, Fran starts us off easy with a loving suggestion to take a social media break. At the time of this recording, “Twitterless Assante” was reaping the benefits of taking mindless twitter scrolling out of his life for some time.

Ep. 2: Family Matters  

This is where we start digging in and doing the work. Here, Fran asks us to look within to resolve family disputes that have gone unchecked. Have the talks that you have been avoiding, even if it feels uncomfortable. Remember to come from a place of compassion when approaching loved ones, and to not take anything personally. Which is a theme throughout many of the early episodes, as it’s the 2nd agreement in The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz, one of the many books Fran has suggested.

Ep. 3: Take 5  

Work on building and maintaining a healthy morning routine. This helps set the tone of the day. By leaving our phone out of this part of the day, we can avoid things like waking up to a long, angry text or some other drama  and letting that guide how the rest of day goes. Basically, set the tone of your day before taking in information from anyone else. 

Ep. 4: Surrender 

Meditate, meditate, meditate. 

Osho books are great for learning more about quieting the mind, as recommended by Fran. Sadhguru is another great teacher who I look to for insight on meditation, mindfulness, parenting, and just life in general. He has a channel on YouTube with tons of videos. Fran also recommends trying Mala beads to assist with meditation, or maybe journaling afterwards. She really just stresses the importance of beginning a meditation practice, without fear of doing it “right” or “wrong”.

Ep. 5: Even Martha Went to Jail  

No clear-cut Wellness Segment for this week, but the main gist of things was: create what you want, what feels good for you. Critics will appear for everyone, no matter how great they are, so do you. Don’t keep yourself from creating things because of fear of how others will receive it.

Ep. 6: Tacos & Quickweave 

In your journal, dissect the relationship you are in. Asking questions like, “Why are you with this person? Who are you *really* doing this relationship for?”   For singles, ask questions like, “What am I *really* looking for, in a person? How do I want to feel when I’m with them? How do I want to show up in their lives? How do I want them to show up in my life?” For those resistant to relationships, ask yourself why and really work through it to get those answers that you seek. ~meditate, meditate, meditate ~

Ep. 7: The Choir & The Competition Are Out 

Parents: Sit with our children and start asking them questions about their interests. Fran shares how she was impacted by her mom not being more encouraging about her becoming a singer, so she wants us to know how important it is to truly listen when our kids ask to pursue new things, even if it isn’t exactly what we pictured for them. 

For everyone, even those who don’t have children or maybe they aren’t quite at the age to start discussing these things: we were all a child at some point. Many people can benefit from asking ourselves if the profession we are in is for you, or if you were just trying to please our own parents. It’s never too late to begin learning more about anything that excites you.

Ep. 8: Fitness Regine Hunter  

(I’m pretty sure they purposely didn’t spell it “regime” because of the difficulty for many in pronouncing the word. lmao)

In this episode, Fran speaks on the importance of holistic health and wellbeing, sharing how much it has shaped who she is and improved her life. She wants us to really sit with ourselves and think about the things we want to work on. Ask, “What can I do to ensure that I’m being the most beautiful *me* possible?” From skin and hair care, to diet, to fitness, to the way we talk to ourselves or others. All the little things that make up holistic living. No quick fixes! We’re here to werrrrrrk, hunty. 

“Forget the internet for a second. Forget what the Instagram models look like, we’re talking about YOU...” - Fran the MF Goat.  

Implement a fitness regime that works for you. Maybe it’s part of your morning routine, maybe it’s an after dinner thing; everyone gets to choose what is best for them and that’s part of the beauty of this life. :) Try a few things and see what works. There is an emphasis on the importance of starting slow, allowing your mind and body to get used to new activity. Fran started off with walking, increasing her distance over time, and then turned that into jogging when it felt right for her. Blogilates and Yoga With Adriene are YouTube channels she mentions here. I have been hooked to yoga ever since trying a few videos from  Adriene. Yoga by Biola is another great channel to check out. Biola has this video, “Restorative Yoga for Collective Trauma”, which I love. I learned of her from The Friend Zone earlier in 2020. 

Skin and Hair: Check out Frans YouTube channel to see all the informative videos she has on all-natural beauty and health tips. Personally, I really like Naptural85 for hair videos as my curl pattern is very similar to hers. Click around on suggested videos to find the ones that speak to you. 

Ep. 9: Don’t Forget the Feet  

OIL UP! From head-to-toe. Get that moisture. Especially in these colder months. Hands, feet, nails, toenails...literally everywhere. Dustin cannot get over the importance of the feet. Fran says this aztec healing clay is great for dry, cracked feet, and she hinted at its ability to fix some facial skin woes as well. Extra Fran tip: put a small amount of oil on your nail beds before painting them. This protects the skin and promotes nail growth. I tried this myself and it’s a game changer in my nail health! They used to get cracks in them once they start getting to a certain length, but if i keep them oiled up, they are smooth as precious little stones. :) 

Ep. 10: A$AP Shirley Caesar  

This episode reminds us that finances, too, can impact our total feeling of well-being. The Friends all want us to get our finances in order, taking the tiniest of baby steps, if needed. Fran’s 3 things to cut back on: 

Eating Out

Online Shopping

Places like Target, where you go for 1 thing and leave with a full cart.

Making these sacrifices adds up. The goal is that eventually, any big things that are weighing on our mental due to finances can more easily be dealt with.

Ep. 11: And I’m Telling You, I’m NOT Going!

It’s all about skin-care in this wellness segment! Starting with what goes into your body, and ending with what goes on your body. First off: DRINK LOTS OF WATER! This not only promotes healthy skin but as we all know, it’s just good for the body in general. The body runs nice and smoothly when it’s hydrated from the inside-out. 

If you need to cut down on your caffeine intake (I’m right there with ya), Fran suggested Yerba Mate. It’s a natural source of caffeine and much cleaner than what comes in other energy drinks. I must say, I feel like the naturally occurring caffeine just hits different. I was hyyype the first few times I got a Yerba Mate instead of my usual orange Red Bull! Energy drink isn’t the only form to get your Yerba fix, thankfully. It’s sold as a loose leaf tea, or in bagged tea as well. I LOVE coffee though, and I am not giving that up so easy. I find that bringing mindfulness to my habits with it, helps me to not consume too much.

Now, for the outside of the body: washing and moisturizing daily is imperative. This may be obvious to some, but it can also feel difficult for those with a really busy schedule. I know for me, as a mom, there has been many times when I only had one chance to take a shower on a given day, and if I didn’t take it, I was always sorry. Or I would take a rushed, half-effort shower and get dressed immediately after without oil, lotion, anything. Having a routine in place for daily washing and moisturizing (that works with my sporadic life) helps me make sure it won’t get missed. Again, as with episode 9, OIL UP! Coconut oil is a great choice, but my skin just drinks it up like water. Sesame oil is a nice alternative because it’s a bit thicker. It was hard for me to get used to smelling like a huge sesame seed though, not gonna lie. But there are so many different oils and butters out there to love our bodies with, just use some trial and error to find which one(s) work best for you.

Last thing: Bedding. Change it at least once a week. Get on the silk pillowcase train! Or if you real fancy, like Fran, get you a full-on silk sheet set. Cotton sheets soak up all the moisture from our skin that we work so hard and lovingly on.

Ep. 12: The Shut Down Mixtape

House cleaning time! Clean your fridge, clean your closets, clean your desk drawers. Clean everything! Trying to especially bring focus to areas that are often overlooked in your regular daily cleaning. By doing this, we clear out old energy, removing heaviness from our homes that we may not even realize is there. I personally can vouch that this helps with anxiety and even lifts my depression symptoms as well. It feels good when the space I live in looks and smells nice, so taking the effort is more than worthwhile.

Ep. 13: Oh God…

Get in touch with what religion/spirituality mean to YOU. This one was hard for me because I wasn’t raised with much knowledge of (or respect for, sadly) religion. As I grew, I became super interested in the various religions and how they affect the lives of others - good or bad. I’ve now learned to adapt my own spiritual practices that support me and help me get by. And this is life changing.

Ep. 14: Say It Like You Mean It

Here, we are instructed to find out what our individual love language is. This comes from the book The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. The 5 Love Languages are: 

Quality Time

Acts of Service

Receiving Gifts

Words of Affirmation

Physical Touch

You may already have an idea of what your primary love language is, but you can get some more information on that by reading the book or by taking quizzes on the book’s website. Knowing your love language, as a single, can help you define what you need from a partner. As someone in a relationship, it can help both partners learn how to best make sure everyone knows they are loved and valued. 

Ep. 15: Yo Mama

Scalp Care for Winter Weather!

½ Cup Olive Oil ~ Seals in moisture

2 Tbsp. Honey (Fran uses Raw honey) ~ Creates pretty shine

½ Cup Coconut Milk ~ Adds protein

½ an Avocado ~ Healthy fat

½ a Banana ~ Softens hair

Blend all ingredients into a creamy conditioner, which should come out a nice light greenish color. 

I keep forgetting coconut milk at the store or else I’d have been tried this one, smh *face palm* But I will edit to add my review after I finally do this. :) 

Ep. 16: Non Profit & Chill

This episode had no segments, but we can still gain a wellness tip from it. Recorded right after Fran returned from a trip to Africa, she had a ton of insight to share on why it’s so important to be an ethical consumer. This episode was a great one to re-listen to as it reminded me that I am reading labels and the “about” pages on brand’s websites for a valid reason that is important to me, not just following trends. Dang imposter syndrome, always trying to step in and ruin everything (shoutout to the Friend Zone for teaching me about that as well, in a later episode.)

Fair Trade Errything !!!

Ep. 17: There’s A Song For That

No wellness segment this week, per say, but again I’ll summarize the episode to make it wellness for us all. The friends basically dode over their favorite break-up songs, from the deepest of soul, to the pettiest of rap songs. Many genres listed, and many bangers. This episode is a great listen for those going through a breakup, or even if you’re a big fan of the episodes where the Friends just let loose and have fun.

Ep. 18: Don’t You Go To Work?

Inspired by Assante and his newly purchased stones, which he is carrying safely in his pocket, Fran suggested that us listeners get in on the magic as well by getting our own stones. Starting with Citrine. This stone is a light orange color, and can be found online or in local crystal stores in most cities. Often referred to as “the merchants stone”, Citrine is believed to attract success. Fran offered the idea of laying it on some money, because she did it and got a random check in the mail soon after...And I kid you not - I did it, and the saaame thing happened to me. I was shook and beyond grateful!

Other stones mentioned here are Lapis Lazuli and Black Tourmaline. Lapis is a pretty, royal blue shade, usually with gold flakes in it. Lapis is known as the “communication stone”. Black Tourmaline is, you guessed it, black, and often found in shiny pieces. Fran says she keeps one of these by her bedside to absorb negative thoughts; letting it cleanse her energy before bed.

Stores mentioned on this episode: Rock Star, and Namaste shop. Both New York based but have online shopping available. Personally, and this is gonna sound real woo-woo, but I prefer picking out stones in person because then I can actually feed off of their energy to pick the right one for me. Those living in a small town, there is probably a crystal shop not too far away.

Ep. 19: The Friend Zone & The Read Mash Up Pt. 1

Wellness this week: be messy and silly with your friends. For me, I don’t currently have any real life friends to hang out with, plus COVID, so my family gets to enjoy all my silly mess. Life just cannot be lived being serious 100% of the time!

Ep. 20: 2015, I’ma Let You Finish, But 2016…

I loved this episode because it brings us back to our journals. Fran asks the guys and us listeners to reflect on two simple, but powerful questions to answer at the end of each year:

What are 3 things you discovered about yourself this year that you love? Things that you feel will propel you into the next year, as a person, career-wise, and as a whole. Write freely about how you plan on maintaining and evolving.

What are 3 things you discovered about yourself this year that you did not like? Maybe some of these things are hard to face. Reflect on how you’ve allowed them to hold you back and what you are doing to adjust them.

[89xhshb]

Naeun squints doubtfully before dissolving into giggles, "I mean if you adopt other girls I wouldn't be surprised because you're so amazing--

"No, no! I'm trying not to drink so much! I can't help it when I'm stuck inside and my dance studio is all closed now. I feel like a potato or something! Yoga is not enough movement for me." Her eyes soften at his encouragement, before she pulled him in for the tightest hug she could manage. "I know and you are always the first I want to run to... I just get pretty shy lots of times~"

After listening to him closely and trying her best not to squeal at the good news, she kept her solid hold of him and tipped her head as cutely as possible, "We can go right now-- Ice cream is always on my menu and I can hear more about your dance class and how I could join."

I think I should really stop adopting pretty people--- /laughs and pokes her cheek playfully. Your smooth talk is becoming top notch! I am a proud big brother~ Ahhh yeah I can relate to that...I turned my home into a dance studio and a recording one while at it. It's still not the same tho. You are the prettiest potato! /chuckles and ruffles her hair gently. Hey you are still doing yoga that is still an achievement. We can always go on runs together or we could have tried those online dance classes. It would have been fun. /thinks for a moment playing with a strand of her hair as he hugs her back tightly.

I know that but still. I am always here for you. Even more for drinks or yummy food or both~ /he hummed and played with her hair as she looked up at him. You are being too cute and offering ice cream. My heart cannot take all of this~ But that sounds like lots of fun. Let's go. I mean it I really missed spending time with you. As for my dance class is just once a week for now. I was unsure about it. I knew I loved dancing and choreography but there is always better people besides I never was much of a teacher. Yet just being around people who are passionate about the same thing and at some point you are all in sync it's a great feeling...almost as good as being on stage. You know you can join them any time. I can give you the times and maybe we can do a shared class? We can come up with some combination of styles between us both. Which reminds me....we know each other for so long and I do not think we danced together much. I really want to do it.

[luki-fanfic]

Dr. Stone Fanfic: Crossed Your Mind - Part 1

Yes I know, it’s not KHR.  But I’m liking this fandom and it’s proving frustratingly effective at distracting me from my other works, so bear with me.

WARNING: suicide of OC, and some minor manga spoilers (end of the stone wars)

—

“Remember Gen, you must always give them enough reason to doubt.”

It’s the mantra his grandmother had uttered every day, before he’d head to school. They’d lived on the outskirts of the town, inside a traditional Japanese home, and the family bitterly held on to every acre around them they could find, no matter how good the offer that came.

It was so isolated, you could almost pretend you were the only one for miles.

Almost, anyway.  And Gen enjoyed the quiet.  It certainly didn’t last long when he had to walk into town, and sound started to echo in his head.  While the citizens and his fellow classmates kept their voices low and polite, their inner voices were no such thing.

‘God, when is he going to call me?’

‘Okay, so if I get A Meal today and the C Meal tomorrow, maybe I can afford two B meals-’

“Ugh, I’m so not ready for that test today.  I’m so screwed!”

‘Dammit, I’m going to be late again!’

Gen winces and resists the urge to cover his ears.

Physic powers are a real burden sometimes.

—

In a place like Japan, filled with overpopulated cities, telepathy is not so much a gift as it is a curse.  It normally runs down his mother’s side, but Gen happened to be one of the lucky males to have it passed down. While movies and comic books might suggest to the common man on the street that having real life super-powers would be cool, Gen will quite happily tell them otherwise.

For one thing, it doesn’t turn off.  It’s a sense, as much as sight and taste, and Gen’s only saving grace is that his own seems to be limited to hearing range at the moment.  His grandmother hears significantly further, and his mother…

Well, she’s not hearing much of anything any more.  But it had been far.

His father does the best he can, raising Gen with his grandmother.  For someone without mind-reading, his father had been a rock.  A psychologist, who worked regularly with police, and had studied ESP as a hobby.  It’s how he’d met his mother, and his days spent analysing witnesses and criminals made him a natural at reading people.  

“If I didn’t know he couldn’t read minds, I’d honestly think he could,” his mother had told at age five, in one of her better moments.  “He knew everything I was thinking just from a smile and a twitch of my hand.”

She wasn’t wrong, and it’s quite frustrating to grow up when both of your parents are impossible to lie to.  On the plus side, they couldn’t lie to him either, and his younger memories are fully of happy moments.

Unfortunately, those became a lot less when his mother’s gift spiked.

—

It gets worse in your mid twenties.  That’s the one thing that seems constant. While the radius remains almost tolerable through childhood and the teens, by 25, the mental reading spikes.  How far varies, but both his mother and grandmother had been brutally honest on what his future entails.  

His grandmother is the only one in the family with the gift to make it past thirty for generations.  And she hasn’t left this house since she was 23.  Not even the threat of bombs during the war had pried her out.  She’d tried to get her daughter to do the same, but she’d ran off to university, positive she could handle it.

At first, she’d been fine.  She’d studied, she’d met Gen’s old man – who found her ability fascinating, and could keep up with her despite his lack of it.  They’d been married in six months, and Gen came along a year later.  When he was two, they learned he’d inherited his mother’s gift, and celebrated his luck.

He was five when his mother started screaming, with the entire city suddenly pounding into her head, and they’d all packed up and moved to the house in the forest while her sanity bled out her eardrums.

Her mother had seen it coming, and tried to help traditionally.  Meditation, and long walks into the country.  Gen, his mother and father, would spend their weekends hiking in the forest, camping in the wild, trying to find areas that were isolated enough to make his mother’s headache tolerable.  Gen is not the outdoors type, but he appreciates the lessons as things he’ll need to learn for his own safety.  If he’s honest, there’s something soothing about the wild – while it frustrates his father, he likes to take off his shoes and wander barefoot when he can.  It genuinely makes him feel at peace.

Unfortunately, the same cannot be said for his mother.  The trips only help so much. Japan is a populated country, and it’s nearly impossible to find yourself outside of civilisation.  While Gen might find it quiet, neither woman ever finds true success.

His father had tried to help her through modern means.  Reduced his hours and thrown himself into parapsychology.  Prescribed any medication that might possibly help.  Sometimes it did.  But she kept getting stronger. Sometimes, the voices were so loud, she couldn’t even tell who was saying what.  Her mental state is so bad at times, his father sometimes thinks to himself she might have genuinely developed schizophrenia.  Which is a dangerous thing to think in a house of telepaths.

On the worst nights, his mother will attack his father, both with her fists, and her words.

“You hate me!” she screams, hands trying to claw at his father’s face.

“I don’t, I love you!” his father screams back, pinning her hands down.  

From his room, Gen just turned and fell into bed, burying deeper into his pillow, pretending that would drown out the words not being spoken.  

Once upon a time nobody in his family ever thought to lie.

But that was a long time ago.

—

If there’s one thing Gen’s ability has taught him, it’s this.  Everybody lies.

It’s a universal constant.  A lot of people don’t even seem to know they’re doing it, but you can’t hide your true feeling from him.  He learns quite young to never trust a smile, or a tear.  He sees and hears first hand someone uttering words of affection while screaming abuse in their head, seen teachers feign affection for eager students when they’re mentally begging them to vanish so they can go drinking.

‘I like you.’

‘It’s no trouble at all.’

‘It’s not that impressive, really.’

‘Gen, I promise, I’ll never hurt you, my baby boy.’

Lies. Lies. Lies.

—

When Gen was eight, he woke up to hear his mother singing in her head.  A happy, ditzy tune, that almost made him hopeful that today was a good day.  That this set of drugs had finally calmed down her hysterics.  In the back of the house, he can hear his grandmother thinking something quite similar, and they laugh to themselves at their need to be hopeful. It’s a thought that stays with them, right up until his mother’s musings cut straight out, leaving frightful silence.

His grandmother screams out loud.  Gen doesn’t, merely jumping out of bed and running towards his mother’s bedroom.

She’s in the cupboard.  She’d used a scarf.  Gen thinks it might have been one he gave her for a birthday, once upon a time.  His grandmother tries to usher him away, but the same thought is going through her head.

His father was away during the incident, and after the funeral, starts looking at Gen differently.  He doesn’t say why – he doesn’t have to.  Gen doesn’t need telepathy to know that his father has suddenly realised his son has a bomb trigger in his head, and his police work falls to the wayside, focused completely on looking at psychic research, looking for something, anything, that might save him.  Gen leaves him to it – it means they speak over phone while he travels, and it keeps things quiet and less depressing at home.

His grandmother has always been the bulk caretaker for him, and that definitely doesn’t change when his mother passes.  If anything, life becomes easier, because they don’t have to worry about her episodes.  A thought that makes both of them feel overwhelmingly guilty, so they never mention it.

To recover, his grandmother teaches him meditation and yoga, ways to calm his mind, and digs out decks of cards to show him tricks.  Given their natural talent, some of ancestors were known in the magic circles – when the world was smaller, and their skills not quite as strong – they worked as magicians, or magicians assistants.  She’s happy to give Gen a hobby that keeps his mind of…well, his mind.  Playing the magician is what allows their family to survive in this modern era - a way for people to explain away their uncanny ability to know all.

Then, his grandmother dies when he’s fourteen, and he’s the only voice in his head for now.

—

When he turns sixteen, he moves to Tokyo, and gets an agent.

His father thinks he’s an idiot.  Begs him to reconsider.  In this day and age, Gen can still be home schooled, and go to university online.  He can have an entire life without ever having to leave their little corner of the world.

Gen is mature enough to admit he might have a point – both of them understand that he has a very tight deadline on his life.  But he wont live like his grandmother, caged in her own house for her own sanity.  And his mother had done everything right and still ended up the way she did. Why spend years studying for a job he might not have the mental faculties to do in a decade?  If that’s his inevitable fate, he’s at least going to enjoy the time he has left and spend it being rich and adored.  

Knowing that people lie, is his strength.  Knowing precisely what they lie about, is something he can use.  While his father might suggest using it to better society, Gen won’t take the risk.  Too many dark and dangerous people to interact with, and the concept is still laughed upon in a lot of enforcement agencies.  Entertainment is far safer – he won’t even be the first in his family to use his skills this way.

The term is ‘Mentalist.’  An entertainer who feigns mind reading or other psychic abilities.  His grandmother had taught him some family methods and the basic card tricks, so he has a pretty good base to start on.  A natural talent at mental tricks, and long, painful hours in a cheap apartment, trying to block out his neighbours voices until he can manipulate a deck backwards and forwards, get him his first gig.  His attractive features, and a knack for knowing just what to say, get him his first TV performance.

A year later, and he’s doing full on shows to a sold out crowd.  Up to a thousand people, all watching him.  All loving him both in their applause and heads.

It’s a drug.  A beautiful, wonderful drug that makes up for living in one of the worlds most over populated cities.

Granted, there’s always a few that don’t enjoy it.  Gen takes pleasure in trying to seek them out whenever he needs an audience member to help him.  The ones that are looking for the trick – Gen does try to keep his act within the realms of possible most of the time.  There needs to be some way for people to guess how he does it, but every now and then, he’ll show off.  Get the biggest disbeliever in the room on stage, and mentally take him apart.  The look of shock, of horror, and astonishment, as this simple being had their entire world view shaken.  When the revelation that they can’t tell anyone because they won’t be believed crosses their mind.  It’s a beautiful thing - Gen thinks he’s personally made at least a dozen sceptics full on psychic believers by this point.

On one occasion, it’s another celebrity.  He’s been booked for a special on exceptional young Japanese citizens, and he’s there for both his psychology and magic credentials.  The piece was fairly run of the mill, with one exceptions – a teen by the name of Shishio Tsukasa.

Although ‘teen’ is a bit of stretch – muscles like that shouldn’t be possible on someone that young.  He’s attending as an example of psychology in fighting – how the state of mind can improve anyone’s abilities. During his own display, Gen can’t deny he’s impressed.  Tsukasa’s mind is calm, and focused, and terrifyingly powerful.

But he also doesn’t believe in magic.  He looks over Gen with the usual polite respect that one in the media masters, but his dismissal of Gen’s talents rings clear as day to him.

As such, when the show cuts for a break, and the two of them are alone in the green room, Gen hides a vicious smirk behind a glass of water, and gets to work.  After a few moments of quiet contemplation, trying to block out the voices around them and focusing on Tsukasa’s own thoughts, he’s ready to go.

“How is dear little Mirai?”

The reaction is beautiful.  He waited until Tsukasa was drinking, and he has to fight back the smirk as the taller teen chokes on the liquid, hand trembling as he drops it to glare over at the mentalist.

Gen gives an innocent smile.

“It’s quite an impressive feat, to soldier all those medical bills on your own.  For what it’s worth, I can completely sympathise.”

That’s not even a lie.  Throwing yourself into work, desperately putting money together to help a family member that has no hope of ever getting better?

Oh, Gen can definitely sympathise.  Tsukasa however, doesn’t seem amused.

“How do you know about Mirai?” he asks, voice low.  Gen completely understands – the teen has gone to extraordinary lengths to keep his little sister’s state out of the media.  There’s only a handful of people who know the Strongest Primate High Schooler even has a sibling.  

“It is my business to know, Tsukasa-chan,” Gen offers, leaning back and resting his hand on one cheek.  “I make a point to know everything about everyone I deal with.  You’d be amazed at the secrets I know.”

“Is that a fact?” Tsukasa asks, body tense, and Gen grins.

“My dear Tsukasa-chan, my entire career is built on reading people,” he says.  “I am young, I am pretty, and I am new to the game.  On the one hand, it works for my brand, but on the other, people always think they can use me for their own good fortune.  If I don’t learn how to manipulate, how to get into the heads of people, I’d never survive.”

He flashes Tsukasa a dark smirk.

“I’m sure you understand this as well as I do.  This world is not fair one, but if you know that, you can still come out on top.”

Tsukasa stays silent, but gives a nod of comprehension, and Gen settles back, satisfied that the indifference in the fighter’s head has been quite firmly replaced with respect.

—

A few months later, Gen is sporting a new black and white hairstyle, and is running through a stage performance to a regular audience.  It’s a small crowd, and there’s nobody he can pick up that’s not genuinely enjoying his act, so there’s no need to psychologically gut anyone in the finale.  Everyone seems happy, and he’ll give them the best show he can to reward that.

Next week, he’ll probably show off, because his father will be attending.  Right now he’s in America, attending some medical conference.  Gen has only seen the man in person since he left for Tokyo three times, but they call regularly.  He’d come to see Gen perform twice, and once come just to yell at him, having taken great offence at Gen’s ‘psychology’ book, especially considering Gen hadn’t even finished High School – but Gen could have seen that coming without psychic powers.  No doubt, he’ll roll his eyes when Gen publicly dissects the biggest sceptic in the crowd for his finale, but then he’ll laugh, and take his famous son out to dinner, before going over the newest research he has in how to keep Gen’s mind sane.

Gen looks forward to it.  Even though he already knows his father has no faith whatsoever that they’ll find a cure in time, no matter what words he might offer.

He’s just completed his final act, one of the more standard ‘magical’ aspects of his performance, where he escapes from a box stabbed with knives, basking in the approving minds, when something dark and ominous hits him like a sledgehammer.

‘What’s happening?’

‘Ohmygodohmygodohmygod.’

‘Am I dying? What is this!’

His smile falters as the voices scream inside his head.  But before he can process the danger, his arms stiffen, his vision vanishes, and he has nothing left but the voices.

Oh god, there’s so many…

‘Is this part of the act?  I don’t like this!”

‘Mom!  I want my mom!’

‘Can anyone hear me!  Help me!’

‘Please!  I’m scared!’

‘HELP!’

He wants to scream. Wants to run away from this darkness and their screams.  But he’s as frozen as everyone else.

Has it finally happened?  Has he succumbed to his family’s curse?  He’s only 19, he supposed to have time left…

But there’s no answer, and the crying, sobbing, frantic minds don’t let up for hours.  But eventually, they start to quiet, and Gen becomes even more alarmed when he starts to realise he can pick out individual voices – the crowd thinning for unknown reasons.

It should be comforting, but with nothing to see, hear, smell…those voices are the only thing keeping him sane.  He cries every time a voice tapers off.

‘Stay!  Come back!’ he begs in his own head.  ‘Don’t leave me alone!’

He doesn’t know how long it takes for the last voice, a young woman whose last thoughts are of her fiancé, to drift away.  But the time after is horrifying.  He’s never been so alone.  There’s always been someone on the edge of his head.  This silence is terrifying.

So, when his own mind starts to drift away, its nothing but a relief.

—

Several thousand years later, he meets Shishio Tsukasa again.  The teen is even more impressive, and the army of stone behind him does not fill Gen with confidence.  Neither does his mental state –and Gen suddenly becomes exceedingly grateful his father would have been in America and is far, far away from him.

He is given clothing, which to his surprise is slightly more elaborate than everyone else, and based on traditional Japanese garb.  It’s the style he’s admitted in interviews and TV appearances to being his preference, and it doesn’t take much to realise he’s being buttered up.  Better clothes to elevate his position in Tsukasa’s new world.  The girl who made them is torn between being happy at making something creative, and being terrified of Gen’s existence. She knows exactly why Gen’s been revived, and she’s not happy about it.

Granted, Gen also knows why he’s been revived, but he can’t tell Tsukasa that.  Any more than he can tell him the one called Senku is still alive.  At this point, he’s not even supposed to know the scientist’s name, so he stays mum.

He’s given a tour of Tsukasa’s kingdom, the strange caves utterly alien to him.  It’s difficult to imagine that this is where Tokyo once stood.  Or that this simple little cave holds the key to their revival.  It’s there that he finds something truly phenomenal.  The date.

Tsukasa had told it to him, but he was still wrapping his head around the concept of what happened that it didn’t register.  But here it is, written on a tree, plain as day.  

Gen’s reeling. Someone was awake during the petrification?  The whole time?  And stayed coherent enough to keep track of the date?  Gen had stayed conscious longer than everyone because he had mental stimulation, and even he’s still iffy on exactly how long he was functioning.  The mental feat this must have taken…

He laughs long and hard in his head when he realises Tsukasa has revived him to track Senku down.  A man Gen suddenly realises he has to meet, no matter what.

So he plays along, trailing after Tsukasa, acting the role of shallow egoist, looking at his options and realising Tsukasa was his key to success in this new world – the person Tsukasa, and most of the modern world, believed he was – looking over Senku’s abandoned hut, and being directed to where Tsukasa had once left a strange blonde girl, only to return and find her missing.

Gen is given a fortnight to hunt down Senku or the village, or Tsukasa will send out a rescue team.  He’s rather surprised that Tsukasa is willing to let him go alone, but then again, a more censored version of his family’s hiking trips have also made it into his biography, so perhaps it’s just rationing resources.  And it does make Gen’s plans so much easier.

—

Once he’s stepped into the forest, and Tsukasa’s mind is no longer close enough to be heard, Gen immediately kicks off the primitive shoes he’d been offered, and sits in the crook of a tree to process what’s just happened.

The world is so quiet.  That’s the first thing he truly registers.  Now that he’s out of the Kingdom of Might, and away from the half dozen people up and running, it’s truly alien at how quiet his head is.  There is nothing but the sounds of wildlife in his ears, and not a single stray thought in his mind.

He hasn’t been this alone in years.  It’s kind of soothing…normal people don’t know how lucky they are, to have this every day.

But as much as he’d love to bask in this quiet, he somehow needs to track down this now infamous ‘Senku’ over untamed wilderness, and figure out a way back without issue.  While he has some outdoors experience, he had modern clothing and supplies on hand, and there’s no markers to help him out, or minds to pick up.

Thankfully, Senku and his blonde friend didn’t do much to cover their tracks. They’re faint from time, but he does manage to follow a trail, finding an old campfire, and then wheel tracks.  He also stumbles across a hot spring, which he admittedly spends a day at before moving on.

Between marking a trail, and his wrong turns, it takes four days before he comes across civilisation.  A beaten mud path that’s probably used by hunters, and when he follows it, he picks up the sound of an instrument, too melodic to be natural.  A few minutes later, he rests at the top of the hill, grinning at the village on the water.

The grin gets wider when he picks up an amazing smell too.  It’s not perfect, but that’s definitely ramen.  And the idea of eating something he didn’t have to gather himself is too good to pass up.

When he walks out of the forest, he settles on a grouping of rocks, just out of sight.  A passing glance at the locals make it clear his getup will stand out like sore thumb, so he needs to stay in observation mode.

Most of the village are hoarded around a bamboo cart, and everyone’s thoughts are filled with only one thing.  How phenomenal this strange food is. They’ve never tasted anything like it.

But there’s one mind that’s running at a frantic pace.  Gen’s almost taken aback – it’s practically speaking another language compared to the more simplistic thoughts around him.  The owner is going over the components of ramen, a string of insanely long chemical components, and most curious of all, counting seconds almost subconsciously.

Gen smiles.  

Hello Senku.

Now, how to approach?  The last time Senku met a fellow modern man, he was supposedly killed.  Gen can’t imagine he’ll be received with much trust.  Gen himself has gone and put together makeshift armour just in case the reaction is more extreme than he expects, so he should expect Senku to be at least that paranoid.

He’s still mulling it over, when an utterly adorable slip of a girl wearing a watermelon on her head hands him a bowl of ramen.  She’s so focused on handing food out, she doesn’t even seem to realise he’s not a villager. Or perhaps that mask is obscuring her eyes?

The ramen itself is…well it’s a painful example of why MSG is in so much food, but the sensation of eating something cooked, that’s been even a little bit processed, is a glorious feeling.  The general aura of delight and joy surrounding him definitely sweeten the bowl too.  One girl even thinks about how they should stretch the rules to get the stranger into the village if he cooks like this.

The teen that can only be Senku is starting to slow down at his cart, and the crowd is dispersing in order to eat, so Gen makes his move.  Something that will get Senku’s attention, but wont appear threatening.

“This ramen is making me wickedly thirsty,” he says with a smile.  “A cola would be great…”

[imfemalewarrior]

FAQ Post - Updated Version

Are Trans Women welcome?

Yes. They are Women.

Do I need to lose weight before I train in Martial Arts?

Many people have either directly or indirectly asked me variations of this. You can start training in Martial Arts at any age and weight is not a factor in if you can Start.

Am I too old to start?

Age is not a factor in starting Martial Arts.

Do I need to get fit before I start training Martial Arts?

Fitness is not a factor in starting Martial Arts training. Just go to the beginner classes.

What Martial Arts should I do?

Go to a few trial classes from different styles and with different groups and pick the one with which you feel the most connected. Compare prices, teachers, students, and cleanliness of the training area.

Make sure there are some more advanced students as this means people have stayed with the organization and progressed in their training or they moved to the area and chose this organization to train. Make sure the organization does not guarantee any level of a belt after a specific period of time-rough estimates are okay but any kind of guarantee sends up red flags that this place is in it for the money since everyone progresses at different rates. Also make sure that their belt system complies with the overall belt system for that Martial Arts style and doesn’t have added levels in between belts (BJJ does have levels in between belts, but not every Martial Art style is like that).

You should do the Martial Arts with which you feel the most connection. Try out the different styles available in your area. Make sure you feel comfortable around the teachers and other students and that the money rates are something that work for you. Make sure the organization is not a McDojo.

If you have any mental/physical limits then speak to the teacher beforehand and quietly sit out if there is something you cannot do.

If you have parents that disapprove because you are a girl or they are worried about it, try ‘gentler’ Martial Arts like Aikido, Women’s self defense, or Tai Chi-they are just as effective but don’t look as scary/aggressive as other styles.

I’m a man/nonbinary/not a woman. Can I still follow you?

Yes, you can follow me regardless of gender.

What is Viraginity?

The Warrior Soul all Women possess.

That’s not what Philia means!

Language evolves, why don’t you?

What Martial Arts do you do?

Capoeira, Kokikai Aikido briefly, and now Tai Chi and I am going to try out Tang Soo Do.

How do I lose weight?

Please read this post. And this one.

How do you motivate yourself/how do I stay motivated?

I set aside time on multiple days during the week to exercise and train. Everyone’s motivation is different, so figure out what motivates you and make that your goal. My motivation is to master different Martial Arts disciplines, because I find most other exercises boring after a while or when I reach a certain physical strength/endurance level, because there is nowhere to go except to add another set or do more reps. In Martial Arts, it’s a learning process because you can do more advanced moves when you master more basic moves or simpler versions of advanced moves in order to be able to do the advanced form of a move or technique.  

There is also this video for how to get motivated.

I have limited income but I still want to learn Martial Arts!

Lots of people on my blog have suggested/found success with talking to the Martial Arts instructor about prices. You can also check with any colleges in your area for student clubs that meet to train.

It’s difficult to get to training/I don’t have time to go/how do I learn Martial Arts all by myself with no formal training?

If it’s difficult to get to training you could go less often and practice what you learned in class until you can go to class again. If you want to learn Martial Arts then make the time for it. You can’t learn any Martial Arts without an instructor in the discipline, you will injure yourself, you will “learn” the moves incorrectly as well as bad habits, you won’t get feedback on what you’re doing wrong and what you’re doing well/correctly. Also, read this post. And this one.

I can’t go to the gym for xyz reason! What do I do?

Exercise at home. You can buy weights or resistance bands and do bodyweight exercises, yoga, or aerobic exercises. You can also exercise outside if possible.

I want to start working out! What do I do?

Experiment with different types of exercise to see what you do and don’t like doing. You should also try going to Martial Arts beginner classes to see which ones you like, as those will get you into shape while teaching you valuable self defense and life lessons.

Why do my muscles hurt? 

Your muscles burn during exercise because of a build up of lactic acid-during exercise your body uses oxygen to break down glucose for energy. When there is not enough oxygen available your body produces lactate which can be broken down for energy without oxygen-this causes lactic acid. It is best to take a break and focus on breathing when this happens until the burning sensation subsides.

After exercising, it is believed there are microscopic tears in your muscles that cause muscle soreness while they heal. It is best to take rest days to allow these muscles to recover and heal from the exercise.

Why is this submitted post tagged NSFW?

I do not know why the submitter of the post tagged it NSFW. I do not edit the tags of the posts submitted to my blog, the only thing I change about submitted posts is to @ the person that submitted it if they did not do so. I would appreciate it if people would stop antagonizing me and the submitters over it, as in the past the submitters have felt the need to apologize to ME for “causing” the trouble, when really the people who should be apologizing are the ones causing the fuss.

-FemaleWarrior, She/They 

[momtemplative]

Nine Days. (COVID-19)

To say day-to-day life has changed since I last posted (March 9)  feels like a gross understatement. Nine days feels like the gestation period of some unknown force that continues to grow.  

I’m writing, but my words feel like sheets of paper in a cyclone. Nothing cohesive. Self-judgment says, does anyone really want to hear what you have to say in the midst of this barrage of COVID-19 thoughts/opinions/posts/news? Then I shut up and write, even if it’s just something, even if it’s not pristine.

Nine Days, in list form:

1. Thursday, March 12, 2020—THE OUTSIDE TURNS DOWN. 

We get the news that schools are going to be shut down for many weeks, probably more. When that happens, the lighting in our house shifts. It’s as if the outside turns down, like half-drawn curtains. And those who live inside the walls of our little house—Jesse, Opal, Ruth, myself, and the pets— take on a fresh-rinsed potency, as if we know we are on the brink of something big and we are in it together.

2.  Friday, March 13, 2020—TARGET

We take a trip to Target. Ruth begs to wear her tap shoes, which I reluctantly agree to. The people at Target are amiable; nobody is concerned about keeping a distance yet. We are pushing carts as two-way traffic down aisles, brushing elbows, as we would on any large-crowd shopping day. Moms exchange nods of camaraderie, like fellow Harley drivers on the highway. The overall feeling is generous and very much we-are-in-this-together. What is different, what is startling, is the very, very low inventory. Some of the shelves are completely empty, (toilet paper, cleaning agents) which, in spite of the music, crowds and fluorescent lighting, feels eerie. 

The lines are 10-12 people long, cards filled to the brim, and even though I don’t hear one short-tempered word, most of the people in the lines are wrapped comfortably in the tiny glare of their smart phones. It’s amazing how deeply grownups crawl into those little screens, even in public. Ruth walks by them with her tap-tap-tap shoes, duct taped at the buckle and two sizes too big. They make a startling, gloriously sharp sound against the linoleum. 

Imagine a line of adults raising their gaze with each step of her foot, like a face-only version of the wave, a beautiful cascade of heads that rise to meet the sound. Each face spreads into a smile when they see where it originates: tiny girl, impervious to her impact, shiny-star tank top and tutu, like a Disney+ version of Madonna’s Like a Virgin.

Back at home, emails flood our inboxes with some variation of ‘COVD-19 closure’ in the subject line. The library. The Rec center. Stores dropping from Main Street like birds shot from a wire. Restaurants and coffee shops are sweating hard, offering discounts on gift cards for later and curbside take-out.

We are getting wind of the fact that we need to slow the spread of this virus so as not to overwhelm the healthcare systems—to ‘flatten the curve.’ We need to stay in as much as possible. Not be in big groups. Probably not see the grandparents for a while. Wash our hands like crazy, scrubbing while singing the ABCs from start to finish.

It sure looks as if we won’t be going to Target (where Ruth who touches every surface with all ten fingers then promptly rubs her eyes and picks her lip) for a while.

3.  Saturday, March 14, 2020—SHOULD WE??

Every out-of-house action feels strange and other-worldly. Even the most benign of outings suddenly beg the question, wait—should we?? Do we really need to?? Going to the kid-gym and kid-yoga just two days earlier suddenly seems outlandish. A planned gathering with friends that felt wonderful yesterday feels out of the question today. 

4.  Sunday, March 15, 2020—COMMUNITY.

There is an amazing video going around of a community in Italy who are quarantined, but still singing from their balconies as an etherial chorus. 

A family-walk around the block feels potent and perennially safe. Our next-door neighbor joins us with her dog. We wave at another family of neighbors who are perched on their porch in the sun, their toddler wearing the hilarious mirrored sunglasses of a studly lifeguard. Then we cross and take the bike path behind the houses that are on the other side of our street. Another neighbor exits from her sliding back door, her dog lurching out from behind her. Yet another neighbor steps out into the light wearing pajamas and with his small dog under his arm. Everyone feels hungry for sunshine and familiar connection, but we all keep our distance.

When I was 13, I took a spring break vacation with friends to Arizona, where we visited the “Biosphere2.” The headlines read: “Eight explorers join together in a daring, high-profile study of sustainability and the new science of biospherics—the study of closed systems that mimic Earth’s environment.” Essentially, eight people lived in a sealed-up dome, a mini-earth, for two years to study sustainability. We could see them all through the glass. I remember waving, though I don’t know how accurate that is. I think of that right now, as I wave to my friends through their windows. 

Even Opal is weighing her options. Just after lunch, she says to me, “I’m going to try and make Ruth my friend. We may be together for a long long time and I want to have fun with her.”

The girls laugh so hard at dinner tonight, we wind up calling a moratorium when they are unable to take a drink without spraying it across the table. This is very unusual.

5.  Monday, March 16, 2020—RAGE

The media is rich with photos of college kids whooping it up over the weekend for St. Patrick’s Day. Seeing photos of hundreds of young bodies smashed together in a bar makes my blood curdle. I can practically see the virus spreading. 

Let’s talk about neuroscience for a minute. The brain isn’t fully developed until the age of 25. Therefore, to leave hundreds of thousands of 18-24 year olds to their own devices to make good choices around self-quarantining is like requesting the same from a litter of wild animals. Is there a psychiatrist out there observing this with some sense of concern? Where are the leaders in this? I don’t just mean parents. I’m also wondering about teachers, staff, the adults who own the bars, ANYONE who has some sense of perspective and enough maturity to help float those who aren’t as evolved.

Concurrently, parents are home from work, doing their human duty of staying home/keeping kids home to slow the growth of this thing. Healthcare workers are AT WORK so we can stay home and everyone can get a handle on this thing. Grr. It really is infuriating.

6. Tuesday, March 17, 2020—WHAT IF IT WERE MY IDEA?

Today I have a random memory of having insomnia for close to a year when I first moved to Colorado fifteen years ago. It was agonizing: the mealy brain that would wake me up with an indifferent shrug and leave me unsettled and restless for hours—a fate far worse than jolting into a leap of wide-awake!—left me feeling dead-brained and disconnected for weeks at a time. The only thing that helped me to recover was to pretend it was all my idea. I have no recollection of how that notion ever came to me but there it was. I’d wake up at 3am and force myself to say, well, super! I was hoping to be up tonight! I have so much to do, after all! Filing, for example, was a big one. Before going to sleep at night, I’d actually pile things by my bed to do when I’d wake up during the night. It positively worked. In under a week, I was sleeping like a mouse.

I got to wondering if that hypothesis could be applied to this COVID reality. Perhaps, I could say to myself, now is as good a time as any to face down some mortal fears and learn about what it’s like to live in quarantine with a four and a ten-year-old. I’m not talking about Pollyanna-Sizing in the least. Just talking about broader perspectives to keep sanity in check.

7. Wednesday, March 18, 2020—A FEW GOOD THINGS

Some parts of this feel tenable, dare I say nurturing. The first few days of this have felt like a combination of a snow day and a meditation retreat. It is part family love-fest, part novel bio-spheric experiment. The weather is warm and inviting so we triple our number of family walks and clock in hours in the backyard. (Backyard, oh how I love thee.) Time feels abundant and luxurious. The slow-drip news of this international trauma infuses the ordinary moments with a sense of urgency, of faintly (or not) facing our individual mortality. Each choice is whittled away by the updated COVID rules du jour. Gratitude lists brim with things that may have previously been taken for granted: health, family, running water. 

I clean the hell out of the bathtub today and enjoy every moment of it. I cannot for the life of me remember an instance when I took my time cleaning the bathtub like this, doing small circles on the tile like Mr. Miyagi. I typically rush through my cleaning with some sense of discontent, feeling that it’s taking up space that could be used for something worth relishing.

I typically feel paycheck-to-paycheck with regards to time. But now, time is one thing we have more of than we could possibly use. Usually, my brain has the feeling of being pulled down the road by pack of strong wolves. A lurching feeling. Now—not the case. I feel a shit load of feelings, but rushed and overwhelmed are not on the list.

While I clean? The girls are content reading books in their individual ways. Jesse is in the living room in the rocking chair he continues to scoff at, feet up on the rocking foot-stool, MacBook in his lap as if he’s rocking it to sleep. In that moment, there is a settled feeling inside the places where rushing and overwhelm are usually expected. This is one part I do not mind about the new norm.

8.  Thursday , March 19, 2020—SNOW / CREATIVITY IS REQUIRED FOR SUSTAINABILITY 

There is at least ten inches of snow on the ground—an abrupt change in weather—and I want to start drinking well before lunch. Cozy as it is, all I can think of is our lack of ability to escape into the out-of-doors. 

Yesterday I felt heavy and blue, like the adrenaline was wearing off and the novelty of our situation was waning. My face felt leaden and I was short-fused with everyone, making audible sighs of exasperation that drive me bonkers when done by someone else. I miss my friends. I miss my routine and my work and Sunday morning writing-then-yoga. I know everyone does, but I do too. I want my Big child to continue to enjoy being with my Little child without constant management. I want to know HOW THIS IS ALL GOING TO UNFOLD. 

Then, moments later, I am telling Opal how we need to try and be patient with each other. We can get what we need with kind words. We are a team. 

I am struggling to find balance. One moment, I am a parent who remembers that Opal feels the same feelings as I do around all of this, yet with less perspective and practice on how to be with those scary inner-bits. The next moment, I am fed up with her vague grumpiness and I just want everyone to work together dammit!

The koan is how to feel spacious in a scenario where there is very little limited space.

Today I awoke feeling brighter. Opal has a Girl Scout meeting over Zoom at 2pm. Something for the schedule that did not originate from a member of Grimes Home Base! Yay! We are both as excited as eager peaches. Facetimes, Skype, Zoom calls are going to be the wiring the keeps us tethered to our relationships. Such irony, when, not long ago, the internet felt like the very thing that perpetuated our universal disconnection. 

People are starting to get innovative with their use of the Web, and it’s inspiring as hell. Creativity will save us. Some of my favorite local musicians are doing “QuaranTours”—live shows on line. A famous kids’ book author is teaching the art of doodling. Late night Talk Show hosts are doing shows from their living room, with kids climbing on their shoulders and cheeks shiny without the help of a make-up crew.

9.  Friday, March 20, 2020—WE NEED A BROCHURE.

Last weekend, we invited our dear next-door neighbor over to watch Frozen 2 with us. She ate our Pirate Booty, sat on our furniture. The things you do with a friend on any given, normal day. This weekend, she texted to see if we wanted to watch another movie, this time with her fiancé who had been traveling last weekend. I felt the need to explain that so much has changed since last Sunday, at least for us. Had it for them? Our tactics had been distilled down to the essence. At this point, we have decided not to let anyone else in the house right now. They totally understood.

Then I ran into them while on a walk today. They were walking towards Elvis and I on the sidewalk and I crossed the street away from them, not at all realizing who they were. I was just doing my usual COVID-cross-the-street-to-give-room move. I was also absorbed in a Podcast. 

I crossed-back to see them. I was genuinely giddy with the prospect of their company. I realized I hadn’t been with any adult other than Jesse during the past week. I must've oozed with fervor! But, quickly I felt awkward because I was standing only a few feet away from them! I stepped back but that also felt wrong. Then I was aware of them being aware of me, and I thought, what is happening to us? These are my friends! But because we are not all on the same page, it can feel a bit clunky. Even still, our interaction was supremely satisfying. I wanted them to stay with me for the rest of my walk, but they had plans to go play Scrabble.

Oh how hungry I was for diverse conversation! Those few minutes on the sidewalk together were rich with talk-points and humor. Memorable. I’m still finding my way with enjoyable FaceTimes, but long-distance sidewalk chats are thus far my jam. I had a fantastic chat with a neighbor a few doors down while we were shoveling, and with another neighbor from my porch to her on the sidewalk. Both were far enough away to comfortably toss a softball. Both lasted only a few moments. Both were lavish with depth and hilarity, but concise, as if there were no time to waste.

March 20, 2020

Photos—Top: gel print by Opal. Middle: quick portrait by Ruth. Bottom: me rainbow-organizing markers (who has time for that on an average day??)

[kireiscorner]

I need help Do you have any tips on drawing female bodies?

1) Take half of what you've learned from anime and throw it out the window.

2) Take every male expectation of women and YEET that shit. Ask girls what makes them feel good, observe people around you, and start pulling from women in real life. I cannot tell you how excited my first animation teacher was that I drew women with muscle mass. Like, the dude outright thanked me in front of the entire class and then went on a tangent about how women have muscles too. Women have so many body types, research the look you want.

3) DO NOT SACRIFICE FEMININE FEATURES! I get it; some of you will be creating trans or agender characters, but keep in mind anatomy and how it works. And by that I mean the way their bone structure and such works. It's more realistic and easier to identify with when people can see their identity there than completely wiping out their journey. Looking more feminine but not identifying as a female does not change the fact that they identify differently. It's just how their body is and you dont need to wipe that evidence to make your point. I know trans ppl who still have feminine feature who identify as male or agender. Its normal??? That's real life, pull from real life.

4) Avoid giving stereotypical features where you can. THAT INCLUDES SLIM THICC AND BIG BOOBS. Not all latina and black women are thick. We dont all have thick lips and big noses or kinky hair. Fuck that. Yes there are common features between races but not always. My mom has a short upturned nose, I have a long bridge and bubble nose, and my Puerto rican cousin has a wide short nose. Pull from real life, but stay true to your character too. Have MULTIPLE refs, at least 7 or so to give you more variety. This includes for body types, lips, noses, eye shapes, etc. Cause I cant count how many times in hs I've seen ppl get mad when different Latinos or Asians got mad for being said another Latino or Asian was the same or that Africans and Blacks look the same or all white people look alike. Theres so much variety in the world, use it. God created it all for a reason. Feed that artistic brain yo.

5) Look to what in real life age groups wear. We dont wear uniforms, overly fashionable color scheme oriented outfits, or model wear. Think about what shapes look good on certain shapes. Think about where they're from, why they're dressed a certain way; again, avoid stereotypes. Not all black girls need to be dresses to be super ethnically-coded. I wear leather skirts, pajama pants, and yoga pants just like every other girl. We all like to be cute but we also like to be comfortable too! Sometimes we dont wanna dress up and sometimes we wanna give aphrodite a run for her money. We dont all wear makeup of have piercings. Anyone can inherit moles, freckles, etc. not just certain races.

6) Figure out personalities first if you can. A lot of times this can determine how a girl does their hair, makeup or no makeup, clothing style, etc. Their personality is very important and can also effect posture and gestures too.

7) PRACTICE. PRACTICE ANATOMY. PRACTICE WITH VARIOUS BODY TYPES. TAKE FIGURE DRAWING CLASSES IF POSSIBLE IT HELPED ME SO MUCH.

8) One thing I constantly see is ppl thinking theres one way certain types of women look or can act. Like, short hair and "boyish" tendencies means ur gay. Feminine traits mean you're weak and soft. Girls who dont have interest in love are bitchy or gay. That's bullshit. Maybe shes content not having a partner, maybe she doesnt need one. Shes no bitch she just dont want you. Characters dont have to date, esp female characters to be an important woman. WE EXIST. There are very feminine, super girly, cuddly cute gay women. THEY EXIST. There are short haired straight women. Draw them. THEY EXIST. Break barriers, your character is yours and if you want a buff, tall, bisexual long haired goddess who believes all clothing must be made of lace do you boo. If you want a character who is lanky as hell, bald, and killer spicy mama go for it. Draw her too, shoot. Draw all the girls.

9) Everyone has different versions of sexy. Boobs and ass hanging out isnt everyone's sexy. Sexy doesnt mean sloppy, sexy doesnt mean turning the character into a prop. Respect your characters plz! You dont know who will see it and who u can influence.

10) DONT LET PPL TELL YOU REAL LIFE WOMEN DONT LOOK LIKE WOMEN THATS DUMB

And those are kireis main rules for drawing women. The most helpful thing is pulling from real everyday life, I promise you. That, and knowing women know our bodies best so we're gonna give you experienced answers. Hope this helps even tho I'm high key ranting lol

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #208

"if you want to soar with vultures, you'll have to swallow crow."

What may we call you? Brittany/Britt or Ozz/Ozzy. When can we send you a birthday card? (Figuratively, of course.): February 5th. And, where are you calling from? (Again, figuratively.): Please free me of the sweltering grip of North Carolina. What is your favorite Hostess/Little Debbie snack? BIIIIIIHHHHH that's too hard. I love that shit. I love the honeybuns, Twinkies, those little chocolate cupcakes... and really just most things lkdjalksdjwoe. Do you/your family buy loaf from the bakery or bagged on the shelf? Bagged. White, wheat or other? Mom usually buys whitewheat, but sometimes just wheat because she knows I prefer it. Have you ever fixed something without knowing just how you did it? I'm sure I have at some point. When was the last time you were on a plane? Last December. Where were you going and why? To Sara's for her birthday. What’s the best news you’ve gotten lately? Mom found a serious deal for a brand new Canon camera with more focal length range than my previous one and she bought it right in time for the wedding I shot yesterday. :') ^And, the worst? My niece may already be developing schizophrenia. If you could invent something, what would it be? Uhhhh... just one is hard. I literally just thought about this for like 5+ minutes and can't think of one singular invention that would actually be important. Well, maybe some sort of totally natural, long-lasting preservative for food? That'd help so many people and would greatly decrease the amount of fruits and such we waste, and it would also save money with probably slightly decreasing the frequency of grocery shopping. Tell me about your favorite pair of pants. I literally just have black yoga/dance pants lmao. Do you like getting dressed up? NO. Is your technology up to date? Depends on how "up-to-date" you mean. My stuff definitely isn't totally current. Ever been stuck next to someone really annoying on a LONG plane/train ride? Nah. Would you be embarrassed to find out you snored loudly in public? Yeah. Are you afraid of heights? Yes, to a degree. What is a compliment you get most often? "I like your hair"/stuff like that. Tell me about the last frightening/weird dream you had. This is hard, I like, never remember my dreams. Now, about the last pleasant dream you had. AHA I actually do remember this one: I got the rare-as-all-fuck and beautiful as all hell heavenly onyx cloud serpent in WoW, which I've tried getting every week for years. @_@ My eyes like popped open and I nearly gasped. Do you feel guilty about killing bugs? Sometimes. If there is a spider in your room, will you be up all night knowing that? YUP. How do you feel about coconut? I hate it. ^ Ever cracked one open? No. If you like someone, what do you do? Generally get shy and smile a lot when interacting with them. If you DON’T like someone, what do you do? Try to avoid being around them, keep talking to them to a minimum. What do you feel most insecure about? What DON'T I feel insecure about? Do you do your part to save the earth? I do what I can as not an independent adult (ex., I don't have my own car, so we don't drive to the dump). I turn the water off when brushing my teeth, I don't linger in the shower, I absolutely will not litter, things like that. Does it ROYALLY piss you off when your intended username is already taken? Yeesh, it doesn't even make me mad, it's just annoying. Describe your sunglasses. I don't have any. What’s the most you’ve spent on a pair of sunglasses? N/A ^Or, ladies, what about a purse? No clue, but definitely not a lot. Actually, what’s the most expensive clothing item/accessory you own? Again, I don't know. What is your favorite spoken language to listen to? Latin. Is there a TV switched on in the room you’re in? There is no TV. If so, what’s on? N/A What room of the house are you in anyway? My bedroom. Do you own anything that is special edition? I think some games, maybe? Maybe other things? Do you have any funky bookmarks? I have one of those moving 3D ones of meerkats. Do you know anyone with a British accent? Not personally. Are you reading any books at the moment? No. If so, tell me the plot briefly. N/A. When did you last get delivery pizza? A few weeks back. Drake Bell or Josh Peck? Back when the show was current, I preferred Drake. I know nothing about him now; Josh is cool, though. When was the last time you had a tick on you? EW idk I don't even wanna think about it. Do you watch Adult Swim? No, I hate it. It's crawling with immature humor. Have you been to the Grand Canyon? No. What is your favorite type of donut? Glazed or plain. Who usually makes dinner in your household? Mom. Name ALL the colors you’re wearing. Oh jeez, I have on a really colorful Day of the Dead-style skull tank top. Literally like every possible color. Are there more females or males in your family? Females. Have you submitted anything to Urban Dictionary? No. Did you have a Gameboy? If so, do you still have it? Yes to both. Is there a playground anywhere near your house? Define "near." Not very. Does anyone in your family snore loudly? Mom. What’s your favorite cereal? Probably Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Or Crunch Berries, the all berries kind. Do you read reddit? If so, how often and what subreddits do you like? No. Do you know anyone who’s had a baby recently? An old best friend from high school. When was the last time you ate marshmallows? Not since Sara was here and we had s'mores last summer. Do you listen to any podcasts? How do you listen to them? No. What brand of toilet paper do you usually buy? I don't pay attention to whatever Mom gets. Why did you leave your last job? The stress was giving me panic attacks. Have you ever eaten at a restaurant and left without paying? No. What was the last thing that made you laugh out loud? Probably Mark or GameGrumps. How old were you when you first became sexually active? 16. What’s your opinion on The Simpsons? I don't have one. Do you know anyone who has been through a divorce? Plenty of people. Do you have to pay for parking in most places in the town/city you live in? No. Can you hear lots of traffic from your house? Does it bother you? A moderate amount. We live on a busy road. Would someone being either a cat or dog person effect you dating them? No. What is the smallest thing you lose your temper over instantly? Hm, idk. Talk to me like I'm an idiot will definitely get me, actually. What’s a job that doesn’t get enough respect? Mfckn teachers. They are WAY WAY WAY underpaid. What did you take for granted until you visited another country? Never left the country. What is the worst first date you’ve been on? Tyler had a flat tire, and we had to walk to the gas station for something I don't remember and back to the sketchy tire place, and it was SO cold and windy. It didn't actually bother me, like he felt godawful and it wasn't like it was in his power, but from a date standpoint, yeah, that was an event. Who is your favorite scientist and why? I'm not educated enough on various scientists for this. Do you prefer emoticons or emoji? Emoticons. What’s the hardest task you’ve ever had to do? Open my mind in partial hospitalization to let Jason go and recover. How did you meet your pet? Teddy was from a friend of a family friend who knew we were looking for a dog. He was a present for me, so I didn't actually pick him, but rather Ashley chose the last remaining puppy with brown on him, and boy did she make the best decision. Roman was one of the shitload of kittens Ash's mother-in-law had; I was immediately drawn to him with his beautiful blue eyes. <3 Venus was from an online hub of ball python breeders, and I just absolutely fell in love with her colors. Kaiju and Mitsu were both from Craigslist. Do you look like any of your grand- or great-grandparents? I don't have a clue. Did/Do you have any PEZ dispensers? Oh yeah. Do you like grapes or raisins better? I only like grapes. What is the most extreme weather your area has ever experienced? I looked it up; the coldest in history is -9*, highest is 105*. Is there anything you plan on watching on TV today? No. Are there any broken appliances in your house? Maybe. Mom may still have my old Sager in hopes of fixing it one day or something, but I feel like we finally got rid of it. What color is the lampshade in the room you’re in? I don't have a lamp in here. At school, what is/was your worst area in math? I don't remember. Have Jehovah's Witnesses ever called to your door? Yes. Do you ever throw money in those ‘wishing’ wells? No. Waste of coins. Ever take money out of them? No. Are you well known by people in your area? No. What is the picture on the desktop on the computer you’re using? A meerkat. Have you ever had your future told? No. Do you 'spit on it’, to seal a deal? No no no ew. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis? No, thank god. If so, have you had any scary hallucinations? N/A Do you believe in ghosts? Totally. Would you ever stay overnight in a haunted house? Sure thing. When was the last time you had an injection? What for? Months ago when I was getting a cavity filled at the dentist. For some reason, I would NOT go totally numb until they gave me like 5+ doses. Is there anything you cannot wait to be over? This eternally-looping groundhog's day bullshit. I want a job, to be in school, friends, just a damn purpose. Do you have any enemies? "Enemies," no. People I don't like that also don't like me, yes. What was the last thing you had done at the dentist? Speak of the dentist, lol. Said cavity filling. Do you scrunch your face up when eating sour things? No, I'm not very affected by sour things. As a child, did you ever get the chance to go to Disney World/Disneyland? World, yes. <3 Are you someone who is really committed to politics in your area/country? No. When was the last time you were on a boat? Where did you travel on it? Two summers ago when I was fishing with Colleen, her husband, and dad. Does your family ever have any kind of weird traditions in your house? No. What would you consider your favorite movie from a different decade? The Lion King. Do you ever take bubble baths only to relax yourself in some way? I never take any kind of bath. When was the last time you were sick? What were you sick with and why? I don't remember. Have you ever wanted your significant other to get rid of a friend? Yes, though I had serious reason, but I wasn't in any way demanding about it/nothing was actually affected by them remaining friends. If you have siblings, have they moved out or do they still live with you? They've both moved out. Do you know anyone who has or has had any kind of mental illness/disorder? I'd love to meet someone who can possibly say "no" to this. Do you ever go to Blockbuster? How frequently would you say you go? *stares off into the distance wistfully* Is your mother a stay-at-home mother or does she work somewhere? She never stops working. What food would you just want to disappear off the face of the earth? Nothing? I'm not going to take away the diet of people depending on some source I just happen to hate. Do movies with super heroes intrigue you in any way? Why is this? Yeah, I just like fantasy stuff, and I enjoy the majority of the plots. I also just enjoy the idea of superheroes existing. Do you watch those late-night talk shows? What’s the best part about them? No. Do you ever listen to music so you can actually change your emotion? I try to sometimes. Do you like shopping alone? I've never really shopped alone. Does your best girlfriend have any talents that you don’t? Yeah, like she can animate pretty well! Have you ever written a song? I wrote a fucking song to the Nintendogs theme as a kid lmfao. Does anybody send you money in the mail for your birthday? My grampa always did, but he's sadly passed away, so now, no. Do you own any shirts that have a year on it? Ha ha, I have a Back to the Future shirt stored somewhere with the date on it, and it says "I was there." What do you think about mullets? I absolutely hate them. Would you rather date an actor or an athlete? I find actors more talented. I'd be afraid of an athlete s/o getting hurt, too. Do you have any scratches on your cell phone? No. Somehow. When was the last time you blushed? I don't remember, it's definitely been a while. Who is one person you met and automatically didn’t like? A doctor for my tremors. She was a BITCH with just such an unlikable, dull personality. Never went back to her. Do you have any video game systems in your room? Which one(s)? I have a Nintendo DS Lite somewhere... and then my laptop is actually a gaming laptop. What movie coming out do you really want to see? The. Live action. TLK. First day? I'm fuckin' THERE son. Is your skin tone lighter or darker than your mom’s? We're about the same. What is the best thing about the beach? All I care about is if the water's warm. Have you ever done another person’s make-up? I gave Jason a makeover once lmao. Have you ever spied on your neighbor? No. Do you think they’ve ever spied on you? No. What color eyes does the last person you kissed have? Brown. Honestly, do you double dip? No, I break chips apart. I will if I'm eating by myself, though. What color is your birthstone? Purple. What is one thing you don’t like sharing? Hmmm. Oh, probably candy, lmao. Where on your body would you NEVER get a piercing? Downstairs. Which Adam Sandler movie do you like the most? He's been in so many, I don't have a clue. I like him, though. Who was one of your first celebrity crushes? Jesse McCartney was my husband. Did your parents ever read stories to you before bed? Mom did. What are you listening to? "Queen For Queen" by Motionless In White. Do you like hickeys? If they're not in an obvious spot. Do you hate the person you fell the hardest for? No. When was the last time you talked to one of your best friends? I don't have a best friend besides Sara, and I talk to her everyday. Is there someone that makes you happy every time you see them? Sara. Do you believe what goes around comes around? Not always. Do you have any summer plans yet? No. I'd like to go up and visit Sara, but I have no clue if that'll happen, especially with me trying so hard to get a job. Do you have any good friends of the opposite sex? One. Do you have a secret that you’ve never told anyone? Yes. Have you ever regretted kissing someone? Yes. Do you think age matters in relationships? To an extent when a minor is involved. Even huge gaps in adult relationships creep me out, but there's nothing morally wrong with it. How many people have you had real, strong feelings for since high school ended? Two. Do you believe exes can be friends? It depends on the intensity of the relationship, I think. Plus what went wrong. Did you ever lose a best friend? Yeah. Has the last person you kissed ever seen you cry? Lol poor thing's seen me sob. Are most of your friend guys or girls? Girls. When was the last time you took a long drive? A few days ago to my psychiatrist. About an hour drive. Have you ever played Spin the Bottle? No. Have you ever TP'd someone’s house? Well, considering I've never been that damn immature, no. Who do you text the most? Sara. What was the last movie you saw? Detective Pikachu. It was cute, although I was expecting it to be more targeted towards an older audience with Ryan Reynolds playing Pikachu. (I knew nothing about it going into it.) Are you a monogamous person or do you believe in open-ended relationships? I'm monogamous. What do you most like about making out? The touching/caressing. Have you ever casually made out with someone who you weren’t seriously involved with? No. Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already? No. Do you miss your last sweetie? Not romantically. It'd be nice to hang out again, though. Have you ever gotten back in touch with an old flame after a time of more than 3 months of no communication? No. If you could kiss anyone who would it be? Y'all been known. What’s your favorite flavor of soda, pop or whatever else you call it? Blue raspberry. Have you ever attended a religious or private school? Yes; I went to Sunday school. How many cars does your household own? One. What time do you usually have dinner? 4:00 for fasting reasons. What’s your favorite meat? Probably chicken. Do you need glasses to read or drive or need them all the time? I always need them. Are you a very forgetful person? I'm so forgetful that I literally sometimes have borderline anxiety attacks that I'm developing dementia or something at age 23 lmao. What is the best gift anyone has ever gotten for you? My dog. Do you look anything like you did 3 years ago? I guess somewhat, though I was way bigger and my hair was much longer. Have you done something dramatic to your looks in the past year? No. Make up or no make up? I think everyone inevitably looks better with make-up as it enhances features and dulls imperfections, but I personally couldn't care less if you wear it or not. I almost never do, so I can't talk. What’s your favorite thing to watch on the TV? IF I was to watch TV now, probably things like animal documentaries. Would you rather be anorexic or obese? Actually go fuck yourself. Do you upload videos to YouTube? Definitely not regularly. I don't know the next time I'll make one. Do you own any albums by Michael Jackson? No. Do you like your phone on silent or vibrate? Vibrate. Do you like Beavis and Butthead? I don't watch it, but it honestly seems pretty damn stupid. What do you believe happens after we die? Who even knows, really. I believe there's something after we die, but we'll have to wait to find out what. Does the concept of eternity scare you? It kinda... does, actually? Like, wouldn't it get boring eventually? Are you happy that you were born and raised where you were? I suppose. Are your parents still together? No. Do you know anyone who is pregnant right now? Yes, and I want to see their fckng son he's gonna be so cute. She's due soon and I pray I get to take pictures of him. Is there a band you like but don’t like the people in it? Blood On The Dance Floor and Otep. Well, Otep is respectable in some areas, but all things considered, she is a bitch. What tabs do you have open right now? Fucking five YouTube tabs, dA, and Tumblr. Who was the last person to write on your wall on Facebook? No clue, and I don't feel like looking. Have you ever seen a tornado in person? Thank Christ in Heaven no. Are you between the ages of 30 & 40? No. How much was a gallon of gasoline when you first started driving? I have no clue, when I got my permit. What was your first car? N/A Who taught you how to drive? My driver's ed teacher and my mom. What was your high school mascot? A firebird. Did you go to your senior prom? Yes. What did you do after graduation? Honestly? I don't even remember, almost at all, lmao. I either went to Jason's or went home/Jason came with me. Any posters on your bedroom walls growing up? When Nicole and I shared a room, she literally covered the fucking walls in Jonas Brothers shit while I was at a friend's house, and I was. Very. Very. Unhappy. Do you remember the first time you drank a beer? I've never had beer, don't want to. Did you ever try cigarettes? No. How did you spend your summers growing up? Swimming, hanging out with friends, playing outside, riding bikes, playing softball with Dad, playing video games... If you could change anything from your teenage years, would you? Hey, could I have been like, a happy teenager??? Do you remember your first time? No considering at that time I didn't realize it essentially was sex, so it wasn't something that stood out at the time. After high school - straight to college or straight to work? I went straight to college. Favorite home-cooked meal growing up? Spaghetti. Favorite place to eat out growing up? It was probably McDonald's. How many stuffed animals do you own? I literally have multiple huge bags in the attic of childhood stuffed animals I couldn't get rid of, lmao. Are you good at comebacks? WOW no. When’s the last time you watched the news? I don't have the slightest idea. Do you love Christmas time? Of course. Do you really think that the number 13 is unlucky? No. What’s your favorite flavor of cough drops? Omggg I love those strawberry ones. Do you have a fan in your room? Yes. I wouldn't survive without it. Do you think Cookie Monster is cute? I don't really feel either way. Do you like candy canes? Yes. Have you ever had a dream where you killed someone? Yes. Which is worse: stuffy nose or runny nose? Probably stuffy? I don't have a runny nose much, but I've got pleeeenty of experience with stuffy noses. Which is worse: Sick to your stomach or sore throat? THE FORMER. What’s your favorite smiley face? c: Do you think your last relationship was a disaster? No. How many concerts have you been to? One. :/ Would you ever join a band? If I was actually talented with the guitar, maybe, but as things are now, nope. Which internet browser do you use? Chrome. Do you know anyone who is a firefighter? No. What was the last wedding you went to? Just a few days ago for a lady who contacted me about shooting hers. It was a great one, and honestly wonderful to see an interracial wedding here in the South. You do nooot see that everyday. What’s your favorite alcoholic beverage? Margaritas. When was the last time you saw a photo of your ex? Probably the last time I was uploading pictures from my old phone; it's the one I take the once-a-year selfie because the Samsung camera is ACTUAL trash. Do you “binge-watch” TV shows? No. Well actually, on the occasions Sara and I have, I can only handle a handful at a time before I completely lose focus on it or, at that time anyway, interest. What is your opinion of clowns? I don't have one. Do you play any games on your phone? Only Pokemon GO if I'm somewhere I can actually play it. Do you plan ahead when it comes to your outfits? No. Have you ever shaved your face? We have this tiny automatic razor thing for your upper lip, and I use that like once a month or less because yay having dark body hair. What color is your front door? White. What was the last vaccination you got? Whatever those mandatory ones are when you become a teenager. Idr. Would you ever try herbal medicine as opposed to conventional medicine? No. If I need medicine for something, I'm using something I know works. Have you ever been to a petting zoo? I think as a kid? Do/did you have a curfew set by your parents? It wasn't heavily enforced, but Mom preferred I be home by 10 if I went somewhere. How many times have you consumed alcohol? *shrugs* When was the last time you wore a hat? What kind? I have noooo clue. When was the last time you sang an ENTIRE song? Good question. I rarely sing an entire song, rather just parts. Do you consider yourself to be attractive? I don't mind my face, but I do NOT like my body, so overall, no. Are you addicted to anything? Technology. What are you craving right now? I've had an insane craving for hot dogs on the grill for like a week now lmao. Mom's doing that and buying some drinks today for the two of us. I wanted my sisters to come for some family time, but my younger sister has homework, and then Ash and kids like... never come here. "Because of the dogs," according to her husband, but I don't believe that. Are you a forgiving person? I'm way too forgiving. Do you have a brother? Yes. Have you ever had a dream of stabbing someone? WHOA actually I think I semi-recently had a nightmare of me going ham stabbing someone for some reason I don't remember. What would you want your last words to be if you could choose them? "I love you" or then "see you on the other side" is cute to me and also indicates we'll be together again. So probably the latter. What band can’t you stand listening to? I reeeaaally dislike Mumford and Sons. His voice is awful. What is your favorite mystery/crime/FBI related show? Does Sherlock count as a mystery show? Would you ever have a bird as a pet? Nah. How’s your relationship between you and your grandparents? Not wonderful. I don't like her very much, and evidence says I'm not her favorite person, either. Do you have a photographic memory? No. Have you ever had to speak at a funeral? No. Do you know someone who’s been cremated? Hm, don't think so. Have you ever talked to someone when they were high? Yes. Your ex is on the side of the road, on fire. What do you do? Uh, call 911??? Dunk water on him if at all possible? I'm not just gonna drive past anyone who's on fucking fire. It’s 2 in the morning and you get a text message, who is it most likely? Sara. I only ever text her and Mom, and Mom would be right outside my door asleep, so. Ever cried while you were on the phone with someone? Is there anyone who hasn't? When was the last time you saw your father? Not since his birthday last month. Do you like any of Justin Bieber’s songs? No. Any time when you need to search something on the Internet, which search engine do you use? Google. Do you believe saving your virginity for marriage or no? I don't care. I believe in saving it for someone you truly, deeply love. When you were a kid, did you ever like Barney? Yes. Omfg I just remembered something with my older sister; when she was little, Barney was her "boyfriend." She was "talking on the phone" with him once, and when Mom interrupted her, she scoffed and said, "I'm talking to Barney." And then Ash and Barney had an ACTUAL "ceremony" for a divorce. That's a thing that happened. What’s the capital of state, country, or providence you live in? Raleigh. When you open your web browser, what is your home page set to? Why did you select this? Google. I think it was automatically set. Would you allow a camera crew to follow you around and make a reality series out of your life (no matter how boring it is) if you got paid well? Why? No. I'd get so fucking annoyed, I'd feel under constant scrutiny, and I don't want fame. If your car broke down would you call a friend or family member to pick you up or would you call AAA (or something like it)? I'd call my mom and listen to her on what to do from there. Do you put a lot of thought into the gifts you buy for people? YEAH. It's rare I actually have my own money to buy gifts for anyone, so when I can, I think hard. On an average day do your thoughts tend to be more positive or negative? Negative, I think. Do you ever trust anyone else to drive your car? If you don’t have a car, do your friends and family ever allow you to drive their vehicles? I don't have my own, but Mom lets me drive hers. Name at least one thing you like about each season. Winter: SNOW. Spring: Flowers!! Summer: swimming. Autumn: visuals. What amount of time do you think is perfect for a vacation? I guess a week?

[crystalblueskie]

I got bored and wrote some jokes. Tell me if you like them.

So, to get started let me tell you a little something about my family. My mom is disabled and so she has a service dog named Callie Ann...that is such a country white girl name, Callie Ann, amirite? Anyways, so this dog obviously goes everywhere with us: doctors offices, grocery store, restaurants. Normal service dog stuff, you know? But for some reason, everybody stares at her like it's the weirdest thing they've ever seen. A dog wearing a vest walking around Target... I use Target because Walmart is too controversial. Walmart: EVIL!! Target: fair game. Walmart: Trump Target:...any other president. Anyways: dog wearing a vest walking around Target, a vest that blatantly say "SERVICE DOG" on it mind you and random people like to just walks up to us as we and the dog are minding our own business and ask "Is she a service dog?" *Stares bewildered* and every time I'm thinking in my head "I DON'T KNOW, WHY DON'T YOU ASK HER VEST!"..."no, no ma'am we just slapped a service dog vest on her so she can go everywhere with us. Thank you for asking. Goodbye. Have a nice day." Another thing about this dog, I love her to death I really do. It's fun we have a young dog in the house again, she loves to play with anything that squeaks or makes a weird noise, I'm getting exercise again! Yay! But my mother takes it to a WHOLE 'NOTHER LEVEL!! We'll out shopping...*whispers* at Target...and we'll walk past the dog section... I'm trying to walk past as fast as possible. My mom stops right at the mouth of the aisle and walks down it. Shit, I know how this goes. My mom and her dog happily trot down the aisle and her dog smells all of the toy until eventually she smells a toy for more than three seconds...my mom is ready. She talks in that annoying baby voice, you know the voice right? *in an annoying baby voice* "Do you like that toy? Yeah! You like that toy? You want that toy? I'm gonna get you that toy!" SHIT. Toy goes in the cart...We end up leaving the store with more dog treats and a goddamn dog toy. Ever. Single. Time. And I'm over here thinking, if I got a toy every time we left the house as a child, I would have more toys than my tiny, little, ADD-riddled brain could handle. Now a days I'm a old 24 years old. If you don't know what that means, it means I'm mentally 24 years old and physically 80 years old. I'll be walking around the house like this *walks around like an old lady holding my back* and my mom will be looking at me and ask "what the hell are you doing?" And I'll yell back to her "what does it look like? My back hurts!!" I look outside "Get the hell of my lawn, you mangy kids!!" Anyways that obviously means I am a young millennial, which basically means that I remember when Netflix was delivered to your front porch and when Blockbuster was a thing. Also, I was told I needed to go to college or I wouldn't amount to anything. Jokes on them, I still didn't amount to anything. I got a Bachelors in Individualized Studies which means I was indecisive about my major and when I graduated I got a piece of paper basically thanking me for my participation. After 5 years of college, I got a piece of paper thanking me for participating in college. Think about that. This is what happened, I was originally going to school to become a teacher, but to become a teacher you must first waste your time taking a bunch of bullshit teaching classes like "How to teach Math" and then after about 3 years you have to submit a portfolio answering questions such as "Why do you want to become a teacher?" Maybe because I need a job and I was told the only way to get one that pays well was to go to college and I like kids sometimes and I took a course in school where I was basically a teachers assistant for 2 credits a semester and this seemed like the easiest job to get at the rip old age of 18. WRONG!! I was so very wrong!! What my teachers and professors failed to tell me was that to even get accepted into my colleges teaching program is not only do we have to answer the portfolio questions is: you have to pass 2 tests. This is what the TAKS tests were really preparing me for. One test was on Math. At this point, I have not done basic Mathematics in 2 years. The other test was on English and Grammar. I have barely passed my English courses with C's my entire life. The cards were not in my favor. You get approximately 60 minutes to finish each test. They take you into this office and you get a little locker and a key in exchange for your Drivers License. You are expected to place your phone and your purse or bag in the locker. They then place you in a separate room with desks with computer lined up against the wall. And at the opposite end of the room, smack in the center is a person that is paid to sit there and make sure you don't cheat. That is their only job, to sit there and stare at you like this *stares around room* am I making you nervous? *whispers* good. Because that is exactly how I felt the entire 60 minutes. And the thing is they don't even give you scratch paper for the math portion, just a TI-84 calculator. You know the ones that cost like 250 dollars and were fucking MANDATORY in middle school? Little secret about those calculators, they have 4 games on them. Yup. Found that out really quick. I used to sit in class on my calculator and the teachers would be none the wiser as I played the same game on my expensive calculator for the whole hour. I still play on it to this day. Anywho, no scratch paper, just an expensive calculator that I can play games on but forgot how to graph on. And I don't know about you guys, but I can't do math in my head like some people, I'm not wired that way. So, I had to go up to the creepy guy paid to stare at us and ask him for scratch paper. At one point I got so involved in solving a problem that I kept getting answers that were not multiple choice options, that I ran out of time and automatic failed 8 out of about 50 questions. A month later I found out that I somehow managed to get a B on a test I didn't finish. *whispers* I'll take it. So, the first time I turned in my portfolio, I had the tests scores that they were looking for but not the detailed answers to their profound questions. I obviously did not get into the teaching education program the first time. A year later I was allowed to turn in my portfolio again. This time I got smart, I made my sister proofread and rewrite my answers for the incentive of 100 dollars of my financial aid. *whispers* I got in. Now at this point, you're probably wondering why I told you all of this and why I don't have a Bachelors in Early Childhood Education like I intended after I went through the torture of 5 years of college and my acceptance into the TEP and the answer to that is, I showed up to the TEP orientation to be told that I had to take 2 more years of teaching courses and at that point I had been in college for nearly 5 years and I was like "There is no way in Hell that I was going to graduate after nearly 7 years of college just to teach children how to count and what the primary colors are." That was probably my biggest mistake in life. Just FYI, all of your childhoods are a lie. Red and Blue are not Primary colors. Cyan, Magenta, and Yellow are the true Primary colors according to the art wheel. To those of you that don't know Cyan can also be called Sky Blue and Magenta is a bright shade of Pink. We good? Good. The definition of a Primary color is a color that cannot be made by combining any two colors. They just exist in the world as is. Still good? Okay. Blue and Red by definition are not Primary colors because they can be made by combining two colors. Blue can be made by combining Cyan and Magenta. Red by combining Yellow and Magenta. They are by definition Secondary colors, colors that can be made by combining two primary colors. Look at that, you came out to have a good time and I tricked you into learning something, I am a teacher. I'm just kidding, I'm lying I didn't always know that. I always thought the Primary colors were Blue, Red, and Yellow just like all of you. I learned that how everyone learns things nowadays, YouTube. Anyways, moving on. The other day I couldn't sleep to save my soul, I had insomnia. And I noticed the weird way that I lay in my bed. It looks a little something like this. *walks over to a pillow and Petunia laying in the middle of the floor* One moment I'll be laying like this *places right foot on side of left knee* You think that ones weird wait until you see the next one. Next minute I'll turn over and be laying like this *place left foot on top of right knee* and then I'll turn over again and do this *pull legs up closer to my body and place them slightly apart* I don't know what this one is, it's like when Deadpool got ripped in half by Juggernaut in Deadpool 2, sorry spoilers. And his lower half has to regrow and he's standing there in front of the remainder of X-Force and Cable but his legs are that of a toddler. That's what this looks like to me, a grown ass person with baby legs trying to run away from something. And then I'll turn over AGAIN and do this *lays almost on front and places left foot of the side of right knee* know this one , this ones not even a sleep position, this is the fucking tree pose from my beginners yoga class. *Stands up and does the tree pose placing both palms together.* Just *hums yoga hum*. That's what that is right there. Haha. I got so bored one morning around 6 o'clock that I decided to clean the mess that was my closet. I had shoes thrown all over the floor of the closet and smack in the middle was a laundry basket that had all the clothes I had ever worn in 3 months. I opened the doors up *pretends to open doors* and I just screamed *screams* and then promptly fainted. Right in front of my closet. That is how messy it was. And the ironic part is that I have OCD. That mess was too much for my tiny, little OCD-riddled brain could handle at 6 in the morning. Which was ironic considering the fact that I had been living with it for 3 months and my OCD didn't seem to mind. But the minute my brain decided it wanted to clean that mess, suddenly my brain was overwhelmed. It took me approximately 2 hours to clean out the junk filled drawers in my dresser and put all of my spring/summer clothes away. Some of you probably noticed I said spring/summer clothes, that is because my autumn/winter clothes do not fit in my room anywhere. So they lay in a tote, a room away, until the temperature starts to drop, and then I would change them out. Men you don't realize this but every girl you know has more clothes than she can count, and some of those clothes, *whispers* she don't even wear. I have a half a closet full of skater dresses, that I wear once in a goddamn blue moon, just because I wanted to feel pretty that day. Interesting thing about switching clothes out, it's not even a new thing. Back in the 19-whatever's girls and women would have a hope chest that was filled with dresses for the spring/summer time when it was autumn/winter outside, and vise versa when it was spring/summer outside. I learned that story from my beautiful mother over there, because one day I pointed to her mothers hope chest and asked what it was used for. Interesting fact about me and my grandmother is that if you look at pictures of her when she was around the age of 13 sitting at the pool, my 13 year old self looked exactly like her, facial expression and all. My grandma unfortunately died of Breast Cancer 5 years after giving birth to my mother, her only surviving biological child. I say "biological child" because after my grandma had so many miscarriages and stillborns, she and my grandpa gave up and went to purchase a child *whipers* from Target. Haha. I'm just kidding, everyone knows that babies come from heaven and that storks carry them down in their beaks to a random families' front porch and leave the baby there to get stepped one when the Husband or Wife goes to check the mail. Probably the Wife, husbands are useless at running errands. You tell a man to go to the store to get 5 items and he comes back with 1 maybe 2 of the items that you had purposely written down on his arm so that he would remember everything. Do women have to do everything? Even figure out what's wrong with our own cars because we've been asking you to do it for 2 months and you keep saying "I'll take a look at it as soon as I have time." "As soon as you have time, bitch? That's right now!! You're sitting on the couch watching goddamned football and drinking beer. Guess what either you can record or pause your game for 15 to 30 minutes or you can sit there watching it and not have anything to eat for dinner, because I was so busy doing your "job", that I forgot to do my "job"." I put quotations around job because I don't understand why the cooking and the cleaning and the children-taking-care of has to be done solely by the woman and why yard work and fixing cars and sitting-on-there-all-day-watching-the-game-while pretending-to-take-care-of-the-children has to be done solely by a man. I don't work like that. Everyone can do any household job. For example, I have broken the side mirror of my moms car 2 times now. Do you think I was just like "Oh, well, I don't know how to fix a mirror I'll have to take it to Chris to get it fixed." Just FYI, Chris is a real person, he's my mechanic for things that I can't fix on my own. Hey, Chris! I didn't just give up, I did what every person in my generation do, I turned to YouTube and typed into the search bar "How to change the side mirror of a 2005 Ford Focus" *ding* Millions of videos pop up. I click on one, I watch it, I now know the basics for how to change a side mirror on a car, I took me exactly 5 minutes to learn it. How long did it take you Chris? Since then I have now replaced 3 of my mothers side mirrors. One on the drivers side that she did, and two on the passenger side that I did pulling in and out of the garage. Both times. YouTube has gotten ridiculous. Remember way back when when it was filled with music videos and people would post videos of them singing along to the songs. Nowadays, you can search anything on YouTube and find a video on it. For example type in "how to get mangy kids off my lawn" and you will most likely find a ridiculous video on how to keep children and dogs off your lawn. I love YouTube, I watch a lot of gaming videos, some Youtubers that I watch are Markiplier, Jacksepticeye, the GameGrumps (creators of the fabulous game DreamDaddy), The Fine Brothers or FBE, Graveyardgirl or Bunny, and Good Mythical Morning with Rhett and Link. Search any of these Youtubers and watch their videos, and you will not be disappointed. I love how there's a channel out there for any genre. Baking, Cooking, Make-up, Video Games, React Video, and ,my personal favorite, rant videos. Do you guys remember when Chris Crocker did the "Leave Britney Alone" video? He was ugly crying and I'm pretty sure wearing mascara and guy liner and he just keeps yelling into the camera for 30 seconds straight "LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!! LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!! YOU *points at person* LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE AND YOU *points at a different person* LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!!" And it just goes on like that for 30 seconds of a guy ugly crying over Britney fucking Spears. You thought girls where the best ugly criers, you were wrong, it's the gays. Gays overpower all girl powers by like a 100. A girl will be like "Look at my make up isn't it nice?" And a gay guy with jump out of nowhere add flawlessly apply FaceOff quality make up and be like "you look beautiful, do you like my sexy alien?". Anyways, I just love YouTube, I could watch YouTube video of people playing scary games that look interesting to me but I'm too scared to play *whispers * all day long.

[arielleyoga-blog1]

What’s Arbonne?

Over a month ago, I received a box in the mail from a company called Arbonne. It was a box i ordered for a 30 day detox that my friend, and inspiration, Danielle was going to coach me through. It was from a brand I had seen twice before in my lifetime. The first time was when I was a nanny, I saw the teas and proteins and because the mom is so aware of wellness I instantly assumed it was some fancy high-end amazing line that I could never afford so I did no asking or looking. the second time was when my now mother in law lost 10lbs: she said it was through an Arbonne challenge at her gym. And that’s it: I never inquired more, never though about it more.

Then Danielle wouldn’t shut up about it. To be fully transparent with you guys; I was getting annoyed. I couldn’t believe how MUCH SHE TALKED ABOUT ARBONNE! BUT, I kept watching: watching her talk about how amazing she felt, watching her clients lose weight and say they felt amazing, watching her post about the income she was getting in her account for helping people, and I kept watching. And she kept asking WHY NOT YOU?

So after 4 months I finally said “Fuck it!” And signed up to help her get a Mercedes bought for her by Arbonne. I thought if I could get rid of my headaches and lose some weight why not? I’d get my money back if it didn’t work after all. And I’d be helping a person I love and admire earn a living and get a car. Who wouldn’t want to help a friend earn money and get a car?!

Less than two weeks into my detox, I joined the business. I joined Arbonne because what it does is everything I seek to do in my life: TO HELP PEOPLE FEEL GOOD AND LIVE A LIFE THAT FEELS GOOD AS NATURALLY AS POSSIBLE! I use organic, non toxic, vegan practically everything in my home. I am always looking for the best hair care, skin care, cleaning products etc. People ask me often about what I love. So...why not work with a brand that is all of those amazing things, and instead of letting Amazon make money...make the money myself? Why not share products that I use DAILY and have TRULY taken my life and lifted it up to another level? WHY NOT ME?

I’m almost done with my detox, and I have truly never felt more energized and joyful in every moment as I have these last three weeks. My body has changed, I have lost inches...but what’s more important to me is how I wake up AWAKE and HAPPY. How I sleep soundly. How I can focus completely on my clients and students and be truly HERE TO SEE AND HEAR other’s in a way I only dreamt of before, but was too burnt out to do regularly. 

Just as i was starting my detox, an Instagram QUEEN I follow Heather McMahan posted a video about a podcast with Theo Von and Dr. Perlmutter covering his book THE GRAIN BRAIN. She had just been in Italy and kept saying how she could eat all the carbs all day and feel fine, but the moment she came back to the US, one piece of bread felt like a ton of bricks. I’ve heard this before from people, and I tell my husband all the time that they way America processes it’s food is NOT to make us well, but to make us sick. Because a sick person results in A LOT OF MONEY for big pharma...and big pharma and our government spoon HARD. This podcast was SO eye opening as to just how much of our health is reliant upon our gut. Everywhere I turned I kept hearing about our gut! People say the first cell that we are created from when we are in utero is our gut: and that cell eventually becomes our brain. Our gut is also known to have it’s own brain. Guys, it’s truly amazing and I will just say READ THAT BOOK, or get the audio book, or just look it up: look up how your gut health affects inflammation in your body and how that affects auto-immune disorders just as much as joint pain. 

So, as I was experiencing this amazing surge of life going through this program, as I was learning more in depth about the benefits of the program, I continued to explore the product line and it’s integrity and fell deeper in love.

Danielle got her Mercedes Benz y'all. She gets to drive to teach soul cycle classes, drive to pick her son up from preschool in a gorgeous car she does not have to pay for. And why? Because she helps people like me FEEL GOOD.

Can you blame me for wanting in, too?  One of the things they talk about when you join Arbonne is your WHY. And part of that reason is because of the reaction you’re going to get from people. People that have never tried the products, have never looked at the company, but think they already know... and proceed to tell you you’re a scam artist. Luckily for Arbonne, I’m an actress. So while the word “no,” can disappoint me and sometimes hurt my feelings, it doesn’t stop me. In Hollywood, every thousand no’s or so gets you a yes. And boo, THOSE YES’S FEEL SO GOOD!

As I was sitting here eating my lunch, looking back on how fast and how amazing this detox has been, I thought about my why and I decided I should share it with you. Because any time you sign up to do the detox with me, or buy a box of our collagen builder with hyralonic acid. Any time you tell your mom to do the detox with you, or buy our RE9 no-tox botanically based SPF. Anytime you go to my Arbonne mall and order something, you are getting me closer and closer to my WHY.

My big why is very well known: I truly believe I was put on this earth to make it a better place. Whether my acting helps a person escape a moment and FEEL something, or my yoga class enables a person to heal from pain, or my pug brings a smile to a person’s face, even my children I feel will be a part of my purpose of making this world better. Raising sweet little hippies that pick up liter like their mom and turn off the water while brushing their teeth and smile at strangers. I love helping people. I love making people feel loved and supported and seen and heard. That’s why I love teaching yoga so much. That’s why almost every job I have had has consisted of me HELPING a person. And Arbonne can allow me to do that on a much LARGER scale. Through this crazy thing called the internet, I have the ability to help THOUSANDS of people find these products and feel better. To connect with them, get to know them, love them and support them and not be confined by the zip code of the studio I teach in. I can help people make sure the skin care they’re putting on their children is SAFE. I can give people what they need to remove the inflammation from their body and fuel themselves organically. 

I am building my Arbonne empire so I don’t have to set an alarm in the mornings and put over 50 miles a day on my car. So I can spend two days a week volunteering at animal shelters and rescues helping give love to animals in need. I am building my Arbonne empire so I can get my husband and I closer to being able to purchase a home, that has enough space to foster those emergency shelter cases without worrying about the safety of that animal or my sweet but aggressive dog. I am building my Arbonne empire so I can buy my mom a house of her own. I am building my Abonne empire because I want to be able to work when I WANT to work when we get pregnant, and take as much time off with my children after as I need. Returning to teach because I MISS IT, and not because I am stressed about finances. I am building my Arbonne empire so we can visit our friends and family in Ohio for more than just Christmas. I am building my Arbonne empire so if I get sick: I can take time off with out stressing out. And that already happened! My nephew gave me the flu, and I took an extra day off to be safe without any stress because of the deposit Arbonne made into my account one week after starting my business. 

I want to build my Arbonne empire because just like I tell my students: I deserve to live a life that feels good. And I will be able to do ALL of those things above, and still be helping hundreds of people a month from my home with my rescue dogs that I’m fostering, from my mother in law’s house in Ohio, while I’m resting in my fourth trimester and nursing my baby. THESE ARE MY WHY’S! 

Arbonne products TRULY make me feel better than I have ever felt before! I didn’t even know I could feel this good all of the time, truly. How would I? Even as a super health-conscious yoga teacher in LA: I still had inflammation in my body. And now that it has lifted, I never will go back to life before Arbonne.  This detox was such an amazing experience: I cannot sing it’s praises enough. My energy is boundless, my head doesn't ache, and while I didn’t need to: the inches I lost look good else where. I will use Arbonne in my home, in my body, and on my skin every single day for the rest of my life. It’s not my “Why” that’s keeping me going...it’s how good I feel. But maybe my WHY will get you to ask yourself “WHY NOT ME?” 

ps: CLICK here to go to my Arbonne mall. 

[namasteanxiety-blog]

Namaste Anxiety

I bow to you Anxiety. 

Let me explain the meaning of the above. Since returning from spending a short time spent travelling in India, I seem to have somewhat embarked onto a completely new and spiritual journey, consisting of practicing gratitude and journaling daily, practicing home Yoga (also daily!) incorporating meditation into my life in the hope to gradually sustain inner peace and receive mindful guidance. One of my New Years resolutions was to start an online blog. Ta-da! I have completed (for the first time in my life) my New Years resolutions and goals - or shall I say I have actually stuck to them seeing as we are now in April! Good going huh?!

I don’t know what it was about being in India, maybe it was the mysterious smell of the sandalwood incense which you find burning of an evening. Maybe it created a soothing ambience within my soul, or maybe it the relaxed Yogi vibe the exciting and laid back culture of Goa itself with the fantastic array of people who surrounded me? Where Yoga and meditation initially originated thousands of years ago. Whatever it was India changed me and may I add for the better. Two years ago I was the standard 26 year old, the party animal, to all my boy’s I was their girl best friend and the only thing that mattered in life was what time we were all getting out for the after work Booze up on a Friday night! Which I would NOT change for the world, great memories to be had most cannot be shared on social media but overall it was a fun and amazing time!  

To the contrary as a child I suffered terribly with a social and generalised anxiety disorder. Nowadays, this is very well known and massively heard of. Mental health is put first nowadays (and rightly so) it is widely spoken about regularly in the news, social media, TV adverts and on the notice boards at your local GP surgeries. There are many fantastic treatments out there from self help groups available for those who need, treatments which your GP can refer you to such as CBT and 24 hour telephone lines which are available 365 days a year for those who feel like they have no one to turn to - all which is just incredible! 

In the 90′s when I was a child social anxiety disorders or anxiety disorders for that matter seemed to be branded as some kind of shyness - so I believe anyway because I was branded as one of those shy children on many occasions. My first memory of this is that I remember being around 6 or 7 years old, sat in my class at Primary School and my teacher asked me a direct question. This of course is completely normal however I could not answer - it wasn't necessarily because I did not know the answer, but I physically could not speak. No words would leave my mouth. My face getting hotter and redder, embrassment filling my body and I could hear the rest of the class whispering behind me. My teacher of course did not make a fuss of this and on the many occasions that it happened, she just moved onto someone else or my friends would answer the question for me.  My point being, is that I now realise, at the age of 28 that social anxiety is and has always been a problem for me in many different ways throughout my life - but it was never treated. It was confused/mistaken with shyness. 

Around the same age 7 or 8 or maybe I was possibly a little bit older, my parents would take me to many social gatherings, family and friends parties, firework displays, holidays, days out etc and there would be many occasions again, where I could not get out of the car at our destination to physically attend the social gathering. I had to be pre-warned if you like, of any event which was coming up in the near future otherwise it would be a struggle to get me there.  

My point being with all of this is that this anxiety has effected my life in many different ways which I have failed to realise until now. I am the girl who takes selfies, laughs loudly when out with friends but I am also the girl deep down who doesn't have much self esteem, tonnes of self doubt & constantly worries. I do believe that spiritual awakening comes to us all at some stage of our lives in order to better ourselves in someway or another and I believe that this for me was whilst I was in India. 

One of the main events which I have not achieved in my life because I was under the anxiety curse - I always wanted to just pack a bag, jet off to Australia on a working holiday visa to stay with my relatives, live a little, work abroad, meet new people, find some independence - all in my younger days of course - I always wanted to do it but I never did. I always seemed to have some little argument in my mind that I wouldn't be able to do it. Yep, you guessed it that side of my brain won. Some may say, ‘well you have still got 2 years to do it’ but you haven't have you? i’ll explain for why... time goes on, opportunities come and go, things change, our careers develop and we eventually become adults with new relationships, houses, children or other responsibilities (mine is my puppy) and therefore that path has diminished as it wasn't taken. 

Therefore, my new journey is learning to bow (Namaste) to any anxiety, fears or emotional issues which I have to learn to push through and swiftly move those feelings to one side. Hopefully this can shed some light to others who may find some inspiration from this post or some confidence :) 

[wintmania]

Chair yoga sequence for seniors

Now if you want to take it one step further, try it without the chair. For example, “If you’re concerned about your knees please do your Utkatasana in a chair” or better yet “Let’s all try Utkatasana in a chair and see how it feels. It is usually best to have chairs available for everyone and give those recommendations to the entire class rather than single one student out. In situations like this we usually don’t need to rely on the chair in every pose, so it’s essential for the teacher to suggest chair as an option. When the student has some sort of physical ailment that makes it difficult to be on the hands and knees, or support his/her body weight while standing, or transition down to the ground, chair can be a useful tool to provide stability and support for the vulnerable areas. Students of any age with knee, ankle, wrist, etc. If possible, we want to encourage our older students who do not have severe physical limitations to move around, to transition up and down from the ground and to experience other yoga poses not limited to a chair when it is appropriate. So chair yoga can be a useful tool for older students for physical and mental support, yet we don’t want it to become a crutch for both students and their teachers. However, we are all aware that sitting is the new smoking, and physical activity is essential for our physical and mental health, so chair yoga is not a substitute for moving around. The promise of “you can do yoga right where you sit!” is appealing to many students and can be a great starting place. When else are they going to practice this skill if not in a yoga class?Ĭhair yoga can also be a non-threatening entry point for beginning older students who are intimidated by the images of bendy yogis in magazines. Falls are common in older population and if the fall happens when no one is around, it is essential for the student to be able to get up. However, there is one major point that we need to remember – older adults NEED to practice transitioning down to the ground and up again. You might say that chair yoga is useful for older adults who have limited mobility and trouble transitioning down to the ground. Then is chair yoga meant for older students who cannot do many classical yoga postures? May be, but most yoga poses can be adapted to the student’s current physical situation without the chair. So ultimately this is not about age, it’s about student’s physical ability. I’ve worked with students who are 70 – 80 years old and who did not need a chair and students 50-60 years old who relied on it extensively. But the interesting thing is that age is really not much of a factor. The reality is that chair can be a very useful prop for students of any age or physical capacity, so today let’s take a look at different groups of people who can benefit from chair yoga. This notion is supported by the fact that when Chair yoga is listed on the class schedule it is usually geared toward older students. This response reflects a common notion among students that if you use a chair it means that you’re incapable in some way, or just old. “I don’t need a chair, – she replied – I am not elderly”. “Let’s use a chair” – I suggested to one of my students few years ago.

[pinerprofile]

Chair yoga sequence for seniors

For example, “If you’re concerned about your knees please do your Utkatasana in a chair” or better yet “Let’s all try Utkatasana in a chair and see how it feels. It is usually best to have chairs available for everyone and give those recommendations to the entire class rather than single one student out. In situations like this we usually don’t need to rely on the chair in every pose, so it’s essential for the teacher to suggest chair as an option. When the student has some sort of physical ailment that makes it difficult to be on the hands and knees, or support his/her body weight while standing, or transition down to the ground, chair can be a useful tool to provide stability and support for the vulnerable areas. Students of any age with knee, ankle, wrist, etc. If possible, we want to encourage our older students who do not have severe physical limitations to move around, to transition up and down from the ground and to experience other yoga poses not limited to a chair when it is appropriate. So chair yoga can be a useful tool for older students for physical and mental support, yet we don’t want it to become a crutch for both students and their teachers. However, we are all aware that sitting is the new smoking, and physical activity is essential for our physical and mental health, so chair yoga is not a substitute for moving around. The promise of “you can do yoga right where you sit!” is appealing to many students and can be a great starting place. When else are they going to practice this skill if not in a yoga class?Ĭhair yoga can also be a non-threatening entry point for beginning older students who are intimidated by the images of bendy yogis in magazines. Falls are common in older population and if the fall happens when no one is around, it is essential for the student to be able to get up. However, there is one major point that we need to remember – older adults NEED to practice transitioning down to the ground and up again. You might say that chair yoga is useful for older adults who have limited mobility and trouble transitioning down to the ground. Then is chair yoga meant for older students who cannot do many classical yoga postures? May be, but most yoga poses can be adapted to the student’s current physical situation without the chair. So ultimately this is not about age, it’s about student’s physical ability. I’ve worked with students who are 70 – 80 years old and who did not need a chair and students 50-60 years old who relied on it extensively. But the interesting thing is that age is really not much of a factor. The reality is that chair can be a very useful prop for students of any age or physical capacity, so today let’s take a look at different groups of people who can benefit from chair yoga. This notion is supported by the fact that when Chair yoga is listed on the class schedule it is usually geared toward older students. This response reflects a common notion among students that if you use a chair it means that you’re incapable in some way, or just old. “I don’t need a chair, – she replied – I am not elderly”. “Let’s use a chair” – I suggested to one of my students few years ago.

[hedonssippingseagrams]

Fic Rec List

I am BIGLY procrastinating so I thought I’d spend some time compiling a fic rec list. Not comprehensive, or in any order. These are just the ones that I re-read or have made me lose my shit. Most of them are ones we’ve all read, but hey... You never know. If you don’t see one that you love on here, send me it! I may have missed some great things.

Barn Burner by campholmes - Hockey butches who hate each other turned girlfriends. There is something magic about this story for me. Maybe it’s the way it’s from Katya’s pov but I can clearly see each of Trixie’s thoughts because I’ve had them before and it’s like watching myself but through the eyes of someone who just wanted to eat Trixie’s ass this whole time. 

 They Don’t Make Em like They Do in the Coutry by yekaterina - Look, let’s just pause and say that half of this list is going to be yekaterina and campholmes but I’m not going to apologize for that. This one features a big age difference with the youngest of them being 30 (I, for one, am tired of reading about 20 somethings falling in love, she says as she fully has a fic about that) and a buzzed headed Trixie who inherited her daddy’s bee farm. Katya works at public radio and is written like a muggle version of Prof Trelawney and I’d quit my job to follow her anywhere.

Vegasboud and Down by yekaterina - Look, I’m showing some serious self control to only have this third on the list. I love this fic so much that it’s actually embarrassing. (No, really. My no drag knowledge friend got me a chocolate semi truck because when I got drunk at her house all I talked about was Big T. In my defense, chapter 2 had just dropped.) This fic features a nasty big dumb truck driver, a broken yet tough and witty erotic dancer, and an adorable rat pup. I can’t even talk about it because while I may be procrastinating, we’d be here all night.

Sandpaper by UNHhhh - Het sex? In my fic list? Yep. This shit is the hottest thing I’ve ever read. But besides that, it’s so well written, the descriptions are refreshing and vivid and sometimes I get lost in my re-reads because I’m fascinated by the small details the author has included.

Double Lines by UNHhhh - domestic pregnant trixie really gets me going. This fic gives me baby fever and I hate it for that but otherwise it’s sooo good. The little nickname in there thrills me. It all thrills me. The relationship is so strong and their fight they have in the middle just... it’s so good. I’m knocked out of words thinking about it.

We’ll take a pause from the holy trinity of authors and explore my other recommendations, but if you haven’t read every single work by those three authors then you’re wrong. 

Honey and Yarrow by katyazeroni - First, A+ for that author name. Second, this is so adorable and cute but also manages to be raunchy and realistic when you’d almost least expect it.  If every tumblr post about wanting a lesbian girlfriend got compiled into one fluffy little present featuring cacti, it’d be this. I love it.

I found a fox, caught by dogs by whenyourhairisalsoahood - This fic has actually changed me as person, no hyperbole. You’ve got yoga teacher katya (but she’s so much more than that in this story) dating a lighting tech Trixie. You’ve got accurate portrayals of past addictions, you’ve got cunty with a heart of gold Violet, you’ve got fisting. This fic has helped me find things within myself that are strong and good, it’s opened my mind to gender roles and where I’d like to ideally fall in them, it’s given me a new kink. It’s so wonderful and I cannot recommend it enough. 

Powdermill Lane by silvervelour - I’m a slut for any fic that takes place in the 90s and opens to a beach bonfire. This toys around with lost love that’s never truly lost and the idea that a small town doesn’t have to be a prison. It’s so much NOT a cliche that it’s jarring at first. I’ll admit, I read it slowly because it always went where I least expected. And I loved that. It’s beautiful and it feels like the type of fic to read while laying on the couch on a Sunday afternoon.

Take Off Your Pink Cowboy Boots by silvervelour - There are some authors that you can tell what they’ve experienced (or not) by how they write their fics. And I can tell you that silvervelour has been in a life changing kind of love. Their fics about Sashea are equally beautiful and soft and slow and calm, so go read those as well. This one is about famous Trixie and back up dancer Katya and for once it’s Katya taking care of Trixie, which is so sweet and kind. I love it, I love love. 

For All The Honest World to Feel by daremebyday - First, I don’t like non-aus very much, but this one is beyond. Second, I’m not sure I’m caught up on this because I had to stop reading because Trixie’s depression was hitting too close to home. But it’s smart and beautiful and cuts deep and I respect daremebyday so much for writing this.

Two Roads Diverged by artificiallale - 13 Going on 30 meets Trixie Mattel. This one in particular has consumed many a text message thread. It’s only 2 chapters in, but it’s one to keep your eye on.

Little Plastic Castle by artificiallale - Let’s do a little lale streak, eh? This one’s cute and sweet and can be read in a quick sitting. I’m a sucker for bakery aus and this little surprise about Katya’s identity was adorable to watch unfold. 

A Ticket to Anywhere by artificiallale - This is the good shit. I love an unreliable narrator and Katya is a plain dumbass in this. Plus there’s a subplot that really makes it worth the read. 

Girls Like Dollies   and   Wingwomen by artificiallale - If you like high school fics, here, drink your juice. If not, no biggie. I’ve stopped reading them, but I liked these when I first got into the fandom. GLD is cute because I love me a good “but I can’t be gay!” story line and WW is cute because it feels like Glee fanfic and I’m trash. 

LoveShack by mallstars - Bitch. This is it. This is my shit. Amber and I will text all damn day about these idiots. Remember that one house at college that was the party house of your crew and it sometimes feels like a liminal space when you think back on it? Welcome to this fic.  (Shout out to Billy and Ryan’s house on West End and special shout out to the bathroom across from Alex’s room where I gave my first oral.) 

A Patch of Heaven by miss_squid - Katya in a suit and Trixie in an ugly bridesmaids dress spend a weekend together. This is cotton candy cute.

When the Sun Comes Up by planecrashdreams - I wish this had finished, but I’m putting it in because it’s good stuff. Urequited (well, requited yet not acted on. Well, acted on but never mentioned again) love. It’s non-au, but I love me a good heart break every now and then.

There’s Beauty in a Work in Progress by acactusandalily - I’ll admit, I’m not sure about this one yet. I’m intrigued as hell and I love Trixie so much in it, but Katya has me a little worried, as do the tags. Guarding my heart with this until it develops, but I trust this author to give me a happy ending. 

Hello? by chantiemaya - GUYS. What was I doing putting this so low?!? A cheating fic DONE CORRECTLY?!? What. I love infidelity fics because I love seeking validation for my past mistakes but this one is great. It also consumed many a text message between Amber and I as we wondered what Joe was going to do. 

Every Other Freckle by missbinch - This reminds me of a favorite fic I read in another fandom. Trixie is Katya’s assistant, Katya is unhappily married to a senator. It’s well written and sweet and gives me butterflies. Currently on hiatus/unfinished.

Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now by trixyaas - You may be thinking to yourself, this is a lot of lesbian fic with zero historical or period pieces. You’re welcome. This is a 1915 fresh off the boat Katya working at Trixie, I’m sorry Beatrice’s daddy’s mansion. She’s about to be promoted to Trixie’s personal maid and spoiler alert Trixie is also a lesbian. What sort of hijinks could ensue?

Five Foot Three by thesemovingparts - Another college fic, this time featuring But I Can’t Be Gay Trixie Mattell, now with Added Trauma. The big part of this that makes me fall in love is that it features my girlfriend Chicago. My friend (the same one who bought the semi truck) has read this because she went to Columbia College and we both love it a lot. 

Troika by spoky - abandoned but so worth reading the first few chapters for the laugh. Guys, Trixie... and Alaska... are dating. And ask... Katya...  to top. I’m wheezin.

Weak by knox - And now we’re fully delving in to non-trixya territory. This one is violet/katya/trixie poly relationship and I’m pretty sure if you chant that phrase three times into a mirror, I appear. It’s damn good.

To the Sickle and Back by aphistas - Soulmate au, violet/katya. Takes place during season 7 filming. This fic shook me to my core and I love it to pieces. 

Strawberry Moon by vrginsacrifice - You know those movies that are so so so good until the end and you get so mad and you rewatch them to see if anything could have told you that it’d end so bad and you go online to see if there’s an alternate ending or a director’s cut? Anyway, read Strawberry Moon. Violet and Trixie compete for Katya’s love, but Katya is maybe to selfish to deserve either of them.

Something Borrowed by artificialjazz and Missbianca - THIS FIC IS MY LIFE. My life and my blood and my oxygen. Spoiled little courtney comes home to find a new wife to be Willam in her house. They end up fucking. They end up in love. The wedding is still on.

Strawberry Daquiri by missbianca - I love witney and I especially love witney in Willam’s pov. I especially love witney in Willam’s pov when they get the voice right for him. This is perfect and sweet and sad but then happy!

More Than I’m Supposed To by missbianca - one more witney because i fucking love witney okay someone needs to write more please

Possibly, Maybe by pichitinha - Coffee Shop AU with the sweetest little plot I’ve ever seen in my life. Cavities. This has suspense and drama and everything is exactly right for a fluff piece. I’m currently really behind in the thing I’m procrastinating on and even skimming this made my anxiety disappear for a minute. It’s good.

Sk8er Girl by Squeaky Pink - Look, I hate reccing things on AQ because it’s impossible to find anything, but this is adorable and I miss this author. HS au, bad girl Katya, good girl Trixie. What more could you want?

Unlikely  and Set Up by Spoky - This is Alaska/Kim Chi fic and that’s really all you need to know to get you to click. Adorable and short.

Art and Anatomy by Pink Shrooms - an oldie but a goodie. College roommates, trans Katya, pee kink, seriously good love. I can’t recall much about it as my list gets further and further, but I know it deserves to be here.

Dina’s Fun Aunt by Ellen Thwoorp - Look, this was one of the first fics I read and it still holds up to this day. It’s adorable kindergarten teacher trixie with eccentric russian katya. Trixie’s closeted, Katya is a woman in love. 

Willam Fixes Everything by Mistress - Oh, yall wanted a twist? Willam/Trixie with some eventual Trixya. Short and sweet, could read in less time than it’d take Willam to make 200 dollars, and it’ll leave you smiling. 

Welcome to the Dollhouse by fryshook - This whole thing reads like I’m high and I love it. Violet and Trixie have a weirdly tumultuous past and are hanging out when Katya sends them a video of him jerking off? I don’t know man but this thing brings me so much joy. It’s one-liner after one-liner.

Alright, back to the good stuff.

Busted Saddles by UNHhhh - Do you ever find yourself liking the aesthetics of brokeback moutain but you want lesbians? You’re in luck! There’s a moment where trixie rides a bike in yellow pedal pushers for a several miles just to bring katya a pie (and then she rides katya and eats her pie, yaknowwhatimean) (I’m getting delirious why did I take this task on.) But yeah this is a great fic I love it I love cowgirl Katya I love any fic that has a pick up truck because I’m southern trash.

Women’s Liberation is a Lesbian Plot by campholmes - Did you see Milk once in college? You’ll probably like this. All jokes aside, this is a lovely and beautiful story. You can tell the author has done her research (which can be said about everything she writes) and it’s really easy to visualize the girls and their personalities. 

The Right Allocations by campholmes - Yeeeeaaahhhh. I don’t even know. I love this song, I love this idea, I love this fic. Fucking Katya in shoulderpads borrowing a pen from Brian Firkus’s gay ass who then proceeds to have the best day of his life. How does the baseline from the song play in your head the whole time you’re reading? That’s good writing.

A Philosophical Anthology of Fucking by campholmes - First, im not just listing all of her fics here, but I am choosing my favorites to discuss. Let me live. Second, Trixie as a needy little bartender to Katya’s Judith Butler gig? It’s all I want. This phrase: “Katya is certain she’s complimented almost constantly, and she’s glad for it. She deserves it.” tells you everything you need to know and it’s such a good story.

Are You Good? by campholmes - You knew it was coming. It’s so good though! Sugar mama fic at it’s finest, with a really good fight in there at the end. Plus, some of the smut in here is insane. 

Rose Soap by campholmes - 70s lesbians. Weed. Bell bottoms. Falling in love. This list making has made me realize that I love fics with giant fights in them that bring them closer together. After I read this I bought rose scented lotion so I could smell Trixie. Hey, im gay whats up .

Glasnost by campholmes - Okay. But this one is too good. It shouldn’t even be on this list. This should be in a museum. Two Russians fall in love in the worst time in Russia, but Katya is too stubborn and selfish to be an active participant in their love. Huge fight. Yuge. I remember when it came out, I was texting up a storm about it. We took sides. (I think Trixie was right, no doubt.) I am patiently waiting for the last installment to see how the girls settle it all. Do not read with vodka or you’ll die trying to keep up with Katya.

Belle Femme by campholmes - This was one of the first fics I read in the fandom and I am so happy that it was. The first few paragraphs hit home in a way that was and still is so jarring that I had to screen shot them and send them to fellow teacher friends. 

Cactus and Lily by campholmes - remember that time Two Birds came out and we all fell debilitatingly in love with trixie? Campholmes wrote a fic about it.

Perestroika by campholmes - It’s too late in this to include reaction gifs but the blinking guy belongs here. So you’ve got little baby drags Trixie, still tight with Trannika and Kim, still pudgy and hasnt buzzed his head yet. Then you’ve got baby drags Katya who suddenly has to host Trixie in her apartment and Trixie falls in love with her HArD and then suddenly when your heart is so full you’re only at the end of chapter one?? And you get to see Trixie go to the Race and Katya transition and they like become adults with lives and each other and its all just magic.

*cracks knuckles* These next four are all just one chapter each but please listen when I tell you that it is all worth it. Just read them, subscribe to them, and when beatricemattel wants to grace us with their gifts, you’ll be rewarded.

Dinner’s Ready by yekaterina - hahaha so this was a concept that used to get mentioned right when I started following beatricemattel but I was never sure if I’d see it. Boy howdy. This is... unsatisfied housewife katya who drinks too much wine and loathes her life meets pink prim proper avon (mary kay?) lady trixie and somehow i swear to god you can look at the words, there’s no written tension but you FEEL IT because ao3 user yekaterina is not a real person who speaks and writes english like the rest of us, they are a messiah that has been granted to us

Pretty in Pink by yekaterina - You know that fuzzy pink sweater of trixie’s? This idiot wrote an entire fic about it. That’s it, really. I have the biggest heart eyes for this fic and soft sweaters and sticky little children who hide in libraries.

Here Comes Your Man by yekaterina - DILF brian. Daddy Brian with his daughter Jolene and his pink ass pants show up to a Valentines day party to meet this frumpy yet gorgeous woman and she realizes that he’s a D she’d L to F. dilf daddy brian. I can’t stop saying those words because they feel so right.

In Deep Trouble by yekaterina - Here’s a fun fact about me. I had my first wet dream after watching Whip It with ellen page. This fic is a roller derby fic. Katya seems intimidated by Trixie which is just my type of shit. 

Well, that’s all folks. It’s 1:44 am here, my alarm goes off at 5:30 and I haven’t done any of the shit I need to do before work tomorrow! Punch me in the motherfucking face, am I right? 

But I hope you find something new in this list to bring you joy. Send me things you think I’d like that aren’t on here. (Friendly Fire is on my list to read, I promise!)

[bookshopkat]

Fiction Writing: Show and Tell

Image by M. H. Photography

We’ve all heard the age-old advice: “show, don’t tell.”  It is, admittedly, a useful lesson for young writers, but is it really the golden rule of fiction that multitudes of teachers claim it to be? Many argue the point, stating that, like most things, storytelling is too complex to be easily boiled down to such simple guidelines.

There are, of course, many situations in which the adage rings true.  In an article on Helping Writers Become Authors, novelist K.M. Weiland asserts that “Showing gives the readers the details of a scene, including what the character(s) are seeing, hearing, touching, tasting, smelling, thinking, and feeling emotionally.”  This sounds obvious, I know, but it’s an important concept.  As writers, our aim should be not simply to inform readers of the existence of a rose, but to help them see the rose, smell it’s perfume, feel the velvety petals and the prick of sharp thorns.  But only if—and this is the crucial point—the rose is elemental to either the narrative or to character development.

The simple fact is that, while “showing” is vital to helping readers share characters’ experiences and thus building empathy for those characters, too much creates unnecessary bloat and drags a story down.  It can negatively affect the pacing, slowing the action, or, worse still, even confuse readers as they try to figure how all that extraneous information relates to the plot.  At the very least, the end result is likely to be a rather dull narrative.

In 5 Creative Flaws That Will Expose Your Lack of Storytelling Experience, StoryFix provides a three examples of how this can happen.  The first is small talk in your dialogue.  I cannot stress this enough.  There is really no need to give readers the full conversation when only part of it is relevant to the plot.  In fact, William Goldman, a highly-accomplished novelist and screenplay writer, urges authors to “begin our scenes at the last possible moment,” which keeps the narrative moving and the audience engaged.  As such, StoryFix advises replacing pleasantries and chit-chat with a single sentence or phrase.

After a few comments about the weather, Marcus broached the topic most on his mind.  “At the risk of sounding ungrateful, I have to ask: why me?  We both know there are at least a dozen more senior professors in this department, so why ask me to lead this dig?”

It’s easy to see how this would be so much more interesting to read than multiple lines of dialogue about “how are you?” and “do you think we’ll get any rain?”  Thus this is one case where, within certain parameters, telling rather than showing can be appropriate.

Another, once again according to StoryFix, is when dealing with sequential time fillers.  Young writers are often tempted, in the interest of what they perceive as realism, to ply their readers with unnecessary details about a protagonist’s daily life.  Let’s be honest, that quickly becomes dull.  In fact, the best basic rule is that if events don’t provide exposition or vital plot points, we should probably either gloss over them and move on or skip them altogether.

Even in Slice of Life literary fiction, it’s important to choose minutiae with discernment, focusing on particulars that hold significance or poignancy for the main character, or which bring up a thematic thought or memory.  In other forms of fiction, we should be, if anything, even more selective.  For example, let’s suppose someone wanted to illustrate a heroine’s quiet, insular life by describing what she does upon arriving home after a long week at work.  While some information might aid in character building, we still don’t need to hear every detail of her evening routine.  If a writer provides overabundant information about how much this woman—let’s call her Amelia—relishes finally kicking off her high-heels, enjoys her hot shower and the way it relaxes her muscles, and debates over what to make for dinner before finally reaching the relevant part of the scene, readers will quickly become bored.  Those details are not important for the story to continue, and thus become cumbersome literary “baggage,” if you will, bogging down the narrative.

StoryFix recommends again telling rather than showing, and then moving forward.  This can be done either in brief descriptions, or, better yet, as a part of dialogue later in the narrative.  I’ve included examples of both below.  Telling via description might look something like this:

Showered, dressed in comfortable lounge wear, and armed with a glass of Pinot Nior, Amelia brought up her voicemail app before settling on the sofa.  The missed call was from Derrick.

“Ami, listen to me,” his words were strangely ragged and hurried.  “I’m on my way over.  I found something on Xander in the archive, and it’s worse than we thought.  For God’s sake don’t drink the wine he gave you!”

In this case, telling rather than showing Amber’s normal evening activities serves to keep the narrative moving forward while still setting an atmosphere of safe relaxation that can then be shattered.  Leaping straight into the phone message might not allow readers to experience the protagonist’s jarring panic so completely, but taking too much time describing her evening might make the revelation too slow in coming and thus less impactful.  Of course, as mentioned before, this is not the only way to handle the information.  Below is an example of telling through dialogue instead.

Amelia quirked a half-grin.  “The next thing I know you’ll start asking where I was Friday night.”

Detective Perez didn’t laugh.  “And where were you?”

“Seriously?”

He only watched her, face expressionless, and she sighed.

“At home.  Like usual.”

“At home.”  Perez paused for a moment as if waiting for more. “Can you account for your time?”

This was getting ridiculous.

“Well, let’s see,” Amelia stared at him blatantly.  “I came home around 5:35, took off my high heels because those things suck, got in the shower—that was at about 5:40, by the way—put on yoga pants and a t-shirt, fed the cat, started pasta and vegetables in the instant pot—6:27, in case your wondering—and poured a glass of Pinot Noir.  Blackstone Vineyards.  Rich and slightly woody with a fruity finish.  Then I sat on the sofa and checked my voicemail at 6:34.  Is that detailed enough for you or should I draw some illustrations?”

In this way, we learn several things about the protagonist—she lives alone, she is on friendly enough terms with a police detective that being questioned takes her aback, she is snarky, and she might have just become a suspect—all while simultaneously keeping the plot in motion.  It’s not difficult to see why this is preferable to weighing down the narrative with unneeded descriptions.

I should mention, however, that there are a couple of types of fiction in which this is not always strictly the case.  (Those who already see where this is heading will no doubt recognize the reason I chose a mystery scenario as that last example.)  According to an article by Zara Altair on The Thrill Begins, successful authors thrillers and detective fiction often hide clues in plain sight.  One of the ways they do this is by slipping a clue in amid otherwise inconsequential occurrences or conversations.  Many, in fact, take it one step further, emphasizing unimportant details to draw attention away from the important one. Altair refers to this as “secret emphasis,” and it’s one of several great ways to allow readers to share the mentally engaging and sometimes confusing experience of solving a mystery.  So, while our protagonist in our non-existent story, Amber, should not be described going through the motions of her normal evening in great detail, that would change if there were, say, some hidden clue that someone had been in her apartment.  The same is true if she finds herself at an event where one or more suspects are present.  You get the idea.  Again, there still ought to be limits, but in those cases it is alright to include some extraneous detail.

The final example StoryFix provides which relates to showing rather than telling is an odd one: the description of food.  That may sound a little absurd, but you’d be surprised how many young writers describe meals in superfluous detail.  I’ve even seen it in published works sometimes, and trust me, unless there is a really good reason for it—such as a protagonist (and readers) experiencing unfamiliar foods for the first time or a narrative centered upon culinary pursuits—it really is dull.  An audience might find themselves thinking things like: “yes, alright, I know what beef stew is.  Can we move on, please?”

While StoryFix asserts that details about food should never be included, however, I do have to respectfully disagree.  There are some situations where some descriptions of fare are fitting or even vital for the narrative or for character development.  As mentioned before, in fiction with culinary-related themes, such as Esquivel’s Like Water for Chocolate, cooking and the protagonists relationship with food can play an important role.  Similarly, basic descriptions of meals can serve as a way to illustrate characters, such as in Rex Stout’s Nero Wolfe novels.  In these books, the eccentric armchair detective is known for being a gourmet, and his assistant Archie Goodwin often briefly describes his boss’s succulent meals and arguments with the cook, Fritz, about the finer points of culinary arts as a tongue-in-cheek way of further illuminating Wolfe’s character.  However, even in these cases, the authors don’t go overboard with descriptions, and that is a very important point.  While it’s not always wrong to include descriptions of cuisine, these should be told rather than shown.  We don’t need an entire scene detailing every smell, flavor, and presentation.

As you can see, the only truly hard-and-fast rule when it comes to “show and tell” in writing is that there are no hard-and-fast rules. However, this will, perhaps, help you to better recognize situations in which it is preferable to provide brief descriptions rather than detailed scenes.  While “show, don’t tell” may be generally good advice, being aware of these exceptions to the rule may result in more engaging and enjoyable tales.  Although it’s far from the only element of a well-written narrative, telling rather than showing certain details, and choosing those details with discernment, can help writers create stories that are better paced and less weighed down.  Knowing when to show and when to tell is an important building block for penning a truly interesting fiction.

[ontarioyoga]

Is Sleep Meditation Real Meditation

New Post has been published on https://www.ontarioyoga.net/is-sleep-meditation-real-meditation/

Is Sleep Meditation Real Meditation

Studies Say Meditation Can Help Prepare Us For A Great Nights Sleep But Put Into Practice In The Real World Alongside Stressful Days In The Office And A Never

It’s predicted that between 60% and 90% of people with insomnia also suffer with depression. Mental health and sleep go together like bed and breakfasts, so how do we ensure we’re getting the best quality sleep possible?

Studies show that the answer could be as simple as regular meditation before bed. Meditation has been proven to help people fall asleep twice as quickly, enhance rapid eye movement sleep states, and preserve deep sleep. In fact, it apparently works so well that by the end of one insomnia and meditation trial, 60% of participants no longer qualified as insomniacs.

So, the science has spoken. But what happens when we trial out these findings in the real world? And, given meditation is about being present in the moment, would having an expectation stop us from truly experiencing the positive effects?

asked two volunteers to meditate before bed each night for a week to see if introducing some calm into their nightly routine could help them get a good night’s rest. Here’s how they got on:

Listen To This Free Guided Sleep Meditation It Will Help You To Enjoy Relaxed Natural Sleep

Play this audio when you want to go to sleep. It’s a 34 minute long free guided meditation for deep sleep that will allow you to drift off and enjoy your rest. It is peaceful and soft, so if you go to sleep quickly, the guided meditation will not wake you back up.

There are no bells at the end, so you will not be jarred back awake. Instead, it will allow you go even deeper into restful, regenerative sleep. For many people, this meditation is so effective that they use it every night to relax into dreamland.

It also is effective for people who have no trouble initially falling asleep, but who wake up later in the middle of the night. Simply listen to it then , and it will guide you gently back into sleep.

For some people, it may help to use the sleep timer on your device to turn off the meditation even sooner

Still having trouble? Try this meditation for completely letting go.

More resources to help you get the rest you need –

Heres A Sample Of The Sleep Meditation Compassion For Friend Guided Meditation Script:

Welcome back to another guided sleep meditation.In today’s practice we’ll be focused on the cultivation of compassion.Sending care for those who are suffering or experiencing difficulty in their life.So, taking some time to get settled.Finding a comfortable position, perhaps on your back or on your side however feels most comfortable for you.Finding a place you can be relatively still.Softening the belly.And perhaps taking a few deep breaths just at your own pace.And allowing your breath return to its natural rhythm.Letting the body breathe itself.And for this practice of compassion today, starting with bringing to mind someone from your life who you care about and you know that they’re experiencing some difficulty.So, this might be a good friend or a relative or a teacher or a mentor.But you know that they’re experiencing some pain or difficulty, some emotional distress.

Here’s What Happened After A Month Of Listening To Soothing Bedtime Stories For Adults October 28, 2019

Meditation is nonnegotiable when it comes to my everyday routine. Most of the time, it means dragging my meditation cushion out from under my living room couch and onto the tiny bit of floor space I have in my New York City apartment. From there, I pull out my smartphone, launch the , and listen to the Daily Calm—a 10-minute guided meditation that changes every day.

I’ve been using this app for more than a year and have found that holding myself accountable for meditating 10 minutes a day is what’s realistic, and it has had a noticeable impact on my life. I can always count on learning something new and finding my center in 10 minutes flat. I feel more grounded, and I’m less likely to react to annoyances such as a pushy New Yorker or a late subway train.

 A Beginner’s Guide to Meditation

My energy level was a different story. I don’t often struggle to fall asleep, but even after a restful seven to eight hours of shuteye, fatigue would creep up on me throughout the day. I’d find myself fighting the urge to curl up for a 20-minute nap. Sometimes I’d go for a quick hit of energy—pounding a pint of water or dancing around my living room—after a long day of work and before teaching an evening yoga class. I started to wonder: Was my quality of slumber lacking? And could guided sleep meditation help?

Description Of Sleep Meditation For Calm Sleep By Wysa Software Latest Version

As mentioned above, devices cannot download Sleep Meditation for Calm sleep by Wysa 0.6.1 from the Google Play Store due to incompatibility or national restrictions. Therefore, loading a Sleep Meditation for Calm sleep by Wysa MOD APK file from a trusted source like sleep.app.relax.calm is considered the best option for you.

Before you get instructions on how to download it, clear the word “APK MOD”. By default, the Sleep Meditation for Calm sleep by Wysa MOD APK is a Sleep Meditation for Calm sleep by Wysa application package kit used on Android operating systems. The custom KST APK file is specially designed for Android users who cannot download this application from .

Week 2 Of Sleep Meditation: Building Intention And Awareness Around Sleep

After the first week, incorporating sleep meditation into my nightly routine became second nature. I would climb into bed, ignore any lingering texts, switch my phone to sleep mode, and turn on my sleep story. From the moment each sleep story began, my mind started to move with the story. However, my skepticism continued. Was this new practice helping my quality of sleep—or would I have gone to sleep just as easily without the guided meditation?

It wasn’t until I went a day without the sleep story that I realized how much of an impact it was having on me. On night No. 12, I skipped my sleep story—and I woke up every hour, on the hour.

Whether it was the intention behind setting myself up for sleep, or something about these sleep meditations that was improving my sleep quality, I realized that if I wanted to sleep well, I would have to make an effort to do so—not just let my head hit the pillow.

 The 9-Minute Meditation You Need to Create More Space in Life

Verhoog De Productiviteit In Omstandigheden Met Overmatige Efficintie

Een onderzoek dat in 2012 werd uitgevoerd, bracht individuen in een real-world multitasking-situatie. Ze moesten een aantal acties uitvoeren waarvoor in een typische werkomgeving verschillende soorten invoer nodig waren, ze moesten ze meestal allemaal binnen 20 minuten volzetten.

Een paar van de individuen kregen mindfulness-coaching en een paar niet. Daarna onderzochten ze ze allemaal nog een keer. “De enige personen die betovering aangaven”, meldden de onderzoekers, “zijn degenen die de mindfulness-coaching hadden gekregen.”

Een ander onderzoek bevestigde dat “elke dag meditatie-achtige gedachte frontale mind-oefening zou kunnen verschuiven naar een steekproef die gerelateerd is aan wat cognitieve wetenschappers constructieve, benaderingsgerichte emotionele toestanden noemen – toestanden die ons meer geneigd maken om met de wereld om te gaan dan om ons terug te trekken ervan.”

Omgaan met stressvolle, krachtige omstandigheden zoals een professional kan zeker een nuttig talent zijn om te hebben, en het is er een die meditatievoordelen je kunnen helpen te domesticeren. Als je extra motivatie wilt om de productiviteit te vergroten, bekijk dan de gratis informatie van Lifehack: Laatste werkblad voor onmiddellijke motivatieverbetering.

The Verdict: Meditation Isn’t Making You Tired Your Lack Of Sleep Is

Meditation is believed to improve memory, thwart depression, reduce our feelings of stress, make us smarter and even make us rich. Keep up the om-ing for years, found UCLA neurobiologists, and meditation may even cause some positive physical changes to the structure of our brains.

But if meditation is so beneficial, how come it’s hard for some people to stay alert whenever they give it a try?

“The only real way to not fall asleep during meditation is to get enough sleep,� says Jon Lieff, MD, a Harvard Medical School-trained neuropsychiatrist who specializes in the relationship between neurology, psychiatry and medicine. “Currently, almost everyone is deprived. Most people need more sleep than they’re getting.� In fact, nearly 70 million U.S. adults suffer from some sort of sleep disorder, according to recent research from the Centers for Disease Control.

Yet many of us don’t realize how tired we are until we attempt to meditate, says clinical psychologist Vickie Chang, Ph.D., a mindfulness meditation teacher in Menlo Park, California. “We may not notice our day to day because we habitually drink coffee or perk up with sugar,” she says. “So when we stop and tune in to our bodies in mindful meditation, we may discover that we are deeply tired.”

To begin a meditative practice:

Get those basics down and you’ll be well on your way to a steady — instead of sleepy — meditation practice. I’m om to that!

Week 4 Of Sleep Meditation: Absence Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

The final week of my 30-day sleep meditation challenge was filled with travel, holiday crazies, and pretty much zero normalcy when it came to my sleep. Which is why I went a few days without sleep stories each night.

The result? After a typical 7 hours of snoozing, I woke up feeling tired and sluggish—not well-rested, like I had been after falling asleep to my sleep meditation. Which is when it hit me: Just like my daily meditation practice keeps me energized and focused during the day, the quality of my sleep is determined by what happens right before I go to sleep.

My biggest realization at the end of this month-long challenge is that whether you have trouble falling asleep or staying asleep, how you set yourself up for sleep is critical.

Thanks to sleep meditation, I’ve seen a dramatic shift in my sleeping habits. Even when I don’t listen to a sleep story to help me drift off, I am way more conscious of the way I set myself up to go to sleep. And for those nights when I do feel like I could use a little help, I know a sweet bedtime tale read by Matthew McConaughey is just a click away.

 This One Simple Practice Will Change How You Feel About Yourself

About the AuthorBridget “Bee” Creel is the editorial producer for Yoga Journal. She works as a yoga teacher in NYC and is the co-founder of the wellness community, . 

Membership Spotlight

Whats The Difference Between Sleep Meditation And Normal Sleep

The difference between normal sleep and Yoga Nidra is that during sleep, your subconscious mind takes over, whereas with Yoga Nidra, your conscious mind is awake and alert. Another key difference is that during sleep, your subconscious mind cannot leave behind your worries and stress, but during Yoga Nidra, your conscious mind can, making it a form of sleep therapy.

‘Yoga Nidra can also offer tools to induce sleep organically, following the workings of your own mind’, explained Yoga Nidra teacher, Jennifer Piercy.

Mejorar La Productividad En Condiciones De Eficiencia Excesiva

Una investigación realizada en 2012 colocó a las personas en un estado de cosas multitarea del mundo real. Necesitaban realizar una serie de acciones que requerían numerosos tipos de entrada en un entorno de trabajo típico, por lo general, necesitaban completarlas todas en 20 minutos.

Algunas de las personas adquirieron coaching de atención plena y otras no. Luego, los examinaron a todos una vez más. “Los únicos individuos que indicaron mejora”, informaron los investigadores, “fueron aquellos que habían adquirido el entrenamiento de mindfulness”.

Otra investigación confirmó que “cada día el pensamiento similar a la meditación podría cambiar el ejercicio de la mente frontal hacia una muestra relacionada con lo que los científicos cognitivos denominan estados emocionales constructivos y orientados al enfoque, estados que nos hacen más propensos a interactuar con el mundo que a retraernos de eso.”

Tratar con condiciones de alto estrés y alto rendimiento como un profesional definitivamente podría ser un talento útil, y es una de las ventajas de la meditación que pueden ayudarte a domesticar. Si desea una motivación adicional para extender la productividad, eche un vistazo a la información gratuita de Lifehack: Hoja de trabajo final para mejorar la motivación inmediata.

Wait Whats The Difference Between Mindfulness And Meditation

Yes, there’s a difference. Mindfulness is a way of being in the present moment with a relatively non-judgmental or non-reactive mindset and meditation can be a way to practice mindfulness, explains Michael Goldstein, Ph.D., a research fellow in the Sleep and Inflammatory Systems Laboratory at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center and Harvard Medical School.

Klatt notes that you can incorporate small aspects of mindfulness into your daily activities, such as paying attention to the feel of the water, texture of the sponge, and smell of detergent while you wash dishes.

As for meditation, Ong likes to use the metaphor of trainspotting. “It’s the activity where people just observe trains, usually standing on the platform or even away from the train station,” he explains. Sometimes trainspotters take photos or write down notes; they are interested in the qualities of the train, rather than using them for a ride.

Understanding Different Types of Meditation

Now, imagine that your mind is like a train station. “Your thoughts and emotions are like trains coming in and out,” say Ong. “Most of us use those thoughts to analyze, judge, or do something—like people who use trains for transportation.”

How To Meditate Before Bed: Improve Sleep And Fight Insomnia

Florida Medical Clinic

When you turn off the lights and lay down in your bed at night, do you find your mind buzzing with thoughts of the day, and plans for tomorrow? If you struggle with “turning your brain off”, you may find yourself feeling restless and unable to sleep. Fortunately, meditation is one way to quiet your thoughts and fight insomnia.

Meditation has been shown to help people who struggle with insomnia and other sleep disturbances. But many don’t know how to meditate before bed, or aren’t aware of the different techniques and methods they can use. 

To help you on your path to restfulness, Dr. Anjum Kumbkarni shares some insights on how to use meditation to improve sleep quality and fight insomnia.

Mindfulness Meditation Helps Fight Insomnia Improves Sleep

If you’ve ever crawled under the covers worrying about a problem or a long to-do list, you know those racing thoughts may rob you of a good night’s sleep. Sleep disturbances, like having a hard time falling asleep or staying asleep, affect millions of Americans.

The daytime sleepiness that follows can leave you feeling lousy and sap your productivity, and it may even harm your health. Now, a small study suggests that mindfulness meditation — a mind-calming practice that focuses on breathing and awareness of the present moment — can help.

A study published a few years ago in JAMA Internal Medicine  included 49 middle-aged and older adults who had trouble sleeping. Half completed a mindfulness awareness program that taught them meditation and other exercises designed to help them focus on “moment-by-moment experiences, thoughts, and emotions.” The other half completed a sleep education class that taught them ways to improve their sleep habits.

Both groups met six times, once a week for two hours. Compared with the people in the sleep education group, those in the mindfulness group had less insomnia, fatigue, and depression at the end of the six sessions.

The findings come as no surprise to Dr. Herbert Benson, director emeritus of the Harvard-affiliated Benson-Henry Institute for Mind Body Medicine. “Mindfulness meditation is just one of a smorgasbord of techniques that evoke the relaxation response,” says Dr. Benson.

How Can Mindfulness Or Meditation Help Improve Your Sleep

Sleep tends to come a lot easier when you’re actually sleepy, but sometimes we hit the lights and get under the covers just because it’s “time for bed” without paying attention to whether that is the case—but mindfulness could change that.

“Our thinking is that by grounding yourself in the present moment and just being aware of what to look for, it gives you a better chance of reducing that fight or flight response,” says Ong. “A lot of people with insomnia go to bed because they’re tired of dealing with the day and they want to escape, but that’s not how the brain regulates sleep and wake. Meditation helps keep you from getting in your own way and it allows your brain to regulate sleep and wake based on how it naturally does.”

Six Free Apps For Meditation Breathing And Falling Asleep

It can be overwhelming to take in what’s currently going on in the world.

And it’s easy to let your worries – whether it be global or personal – build up and weigh you down.

Dedicating a small part of your day to self-care practices can be beneficial for your overall well-being and can help you create a better mindset to deal with what tomorrow will bring.

If you don’t know where to start – there are several mindful apps available to download for free that can lead you through a short, daily self-care practice.

From guided meditation to breathing exercises and practices that can help you fall asleep at night – there are plenty of ways your smartphone can help you to unwind.

Here’s our round up of six apps for relaxation that won’t cost you a penny.

What Are The Reasons Of Falling Asleep During Meditation

Here are some reasons for falling asleep while Meditation. What I understood in last 11 years:1. Meditation on bed2. Choosing your sleeping time as Meditation time3. Doing Meditation after a big meal4. Lying down while Meditation5. Choosing relaxation music such as River Sound with Flute6. Not taking proper sleep from many days7. Targetting the Meditation as relaxation8. Meditation in the night time9. Not setting up a goal for Meditation10. Overthinking11. Not being in the present moment12. Telling a lie to yourself that I am not feeling tired before start13. Losing the control of weight on shoulders14. Not straightening the spinal cord15. Looking downward-facing while start

Sleep Meditation: Whats Happening In Calm Sleep Stories

I started my month-long sleep meditation adventure using the Calm app, which has a feature called “Sleep Stories.” Essentially, it’s a library filled with soothing bedtime tales for grown-ups, narrated by the dreamiest of voices .

“We integrate mindfulness elements into sleep stories in a very deliberate way, giving the stories a grounding, calming quality,” says Christian Slomka, Calm’s community manager and a yoga and mediation instructor. “Instead of an elaborate buildup, Sleep Stories are a gradual unwind.”

There are three main elements of Calm’s sleep stories:

Find an AnchorSlomka says the sleep stories are geared to helping listeners focus their attention on an anchor—usually the breath—to quiet the mind and help shift the listener away from overactive thoughts. As the character in the story travels along her journey, she is fully immersed in the present moment. The thinking is that the listener will experience this immersion along with the sleep story’s character.

Practice Body Awareness and Relaxation TechniquesAnother mindfulness element that sleep stories touch on is body awareness and relaxation. When a story opens, the narrator walks the listener through a brief body scan exercise to help quiet the mind and relax the body. Throughout the story, the character also scans through her sensations, and the hope is that the listener does the same.

Back Up: What Happens In Your Body When You Cant Sleep

To understand what Ong means, it’s helpful to have a little background about our physiology. “When it comes to sleep problems, especially for people with chronic insomnia, oftentimes they’re so caught up in trying to make sleep happen that it creates a sense of pressure that makes sleep likely to happen,” says Ong. “Essentially, it activates the fight or flight response that is built in our body. When that gets activated, your body thinks that it needs to be on guard or vigilant and it tends to override the parts of your brain that regulate sleep and wake.”

This is why once you have that first thought of I just wish my brain would stop thinking and let me sleep, you’re pretty much doomed—you’re already stressing about not sleeping, which makes it even harder to doze off.

Lucha Contra Las Enfermedades Y Mantente Ms Saludable

Las ventajas de la meditación pueden ser útiles para la mente y el cuerpo. Tener la capacidad de lidiar con el estrés en mayor medida puede reducir su impacto en su cuerpo, lo que podría reducir los síntomas y el agravamiento de varios puntos de salud, junto con el dolor de cabeza.

Un investigador de uno de los hospitales instructores de Harvard Medical College señala que “El tipo de problemas que ocurren si meditas tienen resultados en todo el cuerpo, no simplemente en la mente”. Las ventajas para el bienestar abundan si se compromete a meditar.

Hagamos una descripción general rápida: la meditación puede ayudarlo a lidiar con el estrés en mayor medida, ayudarlo a reconocer a sí mismo más y mostrarle cómo reducir el nerviosismo y la melancolía.

Solo con estas ventajas de la meditación, parece bastante que podría dormir mejor por la noche. En cualquier caso, si puede dejar de pensar en las carreras y dejar que sus sentimientos se enfurezcan, será más probable que flote hacia los objetivos de los dulces. El análisis coincide:

“Las prácticas de meditación afectan las capacidades de la mente, inducen numerosas ocasiones de plasticidad neuronal intrínseca, modulan las capacidades autonómicas, metabólicas, endocrinas e inmunitarias y, por lo tanto, median los ajustes regulatorios internacionales en numerosos estados de comportamiento junto con el sueño”.

Las meditaciones guiadas, en particular, pueden ayudarlo a adormecerlo, así que inténtelo en este momento.

Use Critical Thinking To Find Out What Works For You

Meditation can be a powerful tool to help you get better sleep, but it isn’t a replacement for sleep, nor is it the only thing that can improve your sleep. Proper diet & exercise; a calm, cool, and quiet sleeping environment; set meal and bedtimes; reducing the amount of alcohol and caffeine consumed at night— all of these things can have big impacts on your sleep.

1.Britton, W. B., Lindahl, J. R., Cahn, B. R., Davis, J. H., & Goldman, R. E. . Awakening is not a metaphor: the effects of Buddhist meditation practices on basic wakefulness. Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4054695/

2. Zielinski, M. R., McKenna, J. T., & McCarley, R. W. . Functions and Mechanisms of Sleep.  Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5390528/

3. Thorpe, M. . 12 Science Based Benefits of Meditation  Available at: https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/12-benefits-of-meditation#section1

4. Nagendra, R. P., Maruthai, N., & Kutty, B. M. . Meditation and its regulatory role on sleep. Available at: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3328970/

5.Pandi-Perumal, S., Trakht, I., Spence, D. . The roles of melatonin and light in the pathophysiology and treatment of circadian rhythm sleep disorders.  Available at: https://www.nature.com/articles/ncpneuro0847

6. Teplan, M. . Fundamentals of EEG.  Available at: http://www.edumed.org.br/cursos/neurociencia/MethodsEEGMeasurement.pdf

10. Walker, M. . Why We Sleep. The Sleep Cycle. pp 43-55.

Optimistische Resultaten Zelfs Als Je Niet Mediteert

Onderzoekers hebben ontdekt dat de manier waarop meditatie je geest helpt om hoger te werken constant is, niet alleen als je op een kussen zit met je ogen dicht, maar regelmatig bij je blijft. Op basis van de analyse zouden “de gevolgen van meditatiecoaching op emotionele verwerking mogelijk overschakelen naar niet-meditatieve staten.”

De onderzoekers stellen dat dit af en toe kan betekenen dat de voordelen van meditatie niet specifiek zijn voor een activiteit of bepaalde stimulus maar processpecifiek zijn, wat betekent dat ze “kunnen eindigen in blijvende aanpassingen in psychologische prestaties. .”

Reduzca El Aislamiento Y Sintase Realmente Vinculado

Es inusual que dentro de la era de la conectividad fija, el aislamiento y la soledad puedan sentirse mucho más conmovedores. Pero seguramente ocurre, y cuando desciende esa sensación de aislamiento, puede ser abrumador.

No obstante, se demostró que la meditación reduce las emociones de soledad en una investigación sobre adultos mayores, y aquellos que han estado practicando la meditación trascendental, incluso por un tiempo muy breve, dicen que el seguimiento de la meditación proporciona una sensación de estar relacionado y completo, un “Etapa básica de la unidad”.

Sleep Meditation Music I Can Actually Fall Asleep To

Do you have trouble falling asleep? I do! These sleep meditation playlists will help you fall asleep faster, guaranteed.

Is it weird that most sleepmeditation music gives me anxiety? There is nothing worse thantrying to fall asleep to “peaceful” music, but it only ends up giving you heartpalpitations .

After years of trial and error I finally found the perfect sleep meditation music that I can actually fall asleep to.

Is it weird that most sleepmeditation music gives me anxiety? There is nothing worse thantrying to fall asleep to “peaceful” music, but it only ends up giving you heartpalpitations .

After years of trial and error I finally found the perfect sleepmeditation music that I can actually fall asleep to.

Deep Sleep Meditation Tip #2 Deep Meditation Music

Sleep meditation works differently from one person to the next. Some may like to have a sleep meditation video track turned on, while others prefer to listen to a sleep meditation audio with music. Then, there are those who prefer listening to a meditation podcast as it helps them to focus, depending on what type of meditation they’re doing.

Clearing The System: Release Of Stress And Fatigue

Of course, sometimes we do fall asleep in meditation, but that’s fine. It’s important not to vigilantly guard against sleep during meditation. Instead, it’s better to think of sleep and dullness during meditation as the release of fatigue and stress. For some of us, it’ll be necessary to go through a lot of sleep and fatigue during meditation, and sometimes even after meditation. It would help to keep in mind that these signs indicate a very beneficial clearing process.

If you have an overwhelming urge to lie down and sleep during meditation, then do that . When you wake up, sit up and meditate for five or so additional minutes. Your system will have cleared a backlog of fatigue, so even a short meditation after waking will be very useful.

Increasing Feelings Of Stress Anxiety & Depression

Stress doesn’t go away on its own, and if left to its own devices it can spiral out of control quite fast.

If we don’t find a way of dealing with our stress, every new day just adds an extra layer on top of it, until we can no longer bear the weight of it.

Meditation can help deal with stress and resolve things that we need to go pretty deep within ourselves to figure out.

If we don’t have something similar to a meditation practice, our stress can just keep growing until it reaches a level we can’t deal with anymore. This can lead to nervous breakdowns and the like.

Week 1 Of Sleep Meditation: Am I Doing This Right

Imagine the quintessential New York City hustle—then, imagine me in it.

I wake up at 5 a.m. on the regular, teach yoga in the morning, work out, plow through a full work day, and sometimes even teach yoga again at night. So, you’d better believe that when my head hits the pillow at night, I’m out like a light. When I began this challenge, I decided to make a conscious effort to not only try to go to bed early, but to actually start winding down before leaping under the covers . Sounds dreamy, right?

The first week of my sleep meditation was extremely frustrating. Maybe it was because I’m impatient and didn’t notice a difference after a few days. Or maybe it’s because this sleep meditation challenge just felt like another task on my long to-do list at first. Also, I would fall asleep within the first 5 minutes of each 25-minute sleep story, which, looking back, was a good sign. But during the first few days, I was annoyed at my inability to stay awake and listen to more of the story.

But around day 5, I discovered that Calm’s sleep stories were designed to mimic the kind of bedtime stories most of us experienced when we were kids, which means the whole point of them was to lull me into a deep, restful sleep—keep me awake, on the edge of my seat.

At the end of my first week of sleep meditation, I stopped judging myself for whether or not I was doing it “correctly” and focused instead on how grateful I was to be able to fall asleep.

Deep Sleep Meditation For Healing & Regeneration

: 4.9 Stars

What they say “This ambient sleep meditation music was designed to help you fall asleep fast. Calming your mind, releasing tension and stress, and allowing you to drift into a deep and restorative delta sleep state. Produced in 528 Hz with the intention of stimulating rest, healing, and regeneration.”

Does it actually do all that? I have no clue, but it is really relaxing and does help me fall into a deep sleep. In fact, I just listened to it while writing this post to make sure it was still one of my favorites. I immediately started getting so tired I had to turn it off .

Letting Go Into Meditation For Deeper Cleansing

Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar tells us that there are two types of letting go. One is where everything drops and you sink into an unconscious state—this is sleep, a state, where knowledge is not available. The other type of letting go allows you to completely relax, but with slight intention or feeling that very subtly continues—that’s meditation.

Meditation and sleep are both hypometabolic states, where breathing and other body activities decline. Both release stresses, but the rest that meditation gives is much deeper than the rest that comes from sleep. Therefore, deeper rooted impressions, or , leave the system.

Yet meditation is completely beyond sleep. It’s consciousness, knowingly becoming conscious of itself. That same consciousness is present during waking, dreaming, and sleep, and witnesses all of them.

Although in sleep the consciousness is not active in any of its “modes,” it’s still present as the witness to sleep. This is how you know that you had a “good sleep.”

As Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar beautifully says, “Wakefulness and sleep are like sunrise and darkness, while dreams are like the twilight in between. Meditation is like the flight to outer space, where there is no sunset, no sunrise—nothing!“

Meditatievoordelen Die U Succesvol Zullen Maken

Laatste update op 17 februari 2021

Wat kan heel goed hoger zijn dan het bereiken van uw enorme doelstellingen? Het lijkt erop dat meditatie – één ding dat je mogelijk elke dag zou kunnen doen, gratis en met weinig moeite – voordelen biedt die succes niet kan overbrengen. Meditatievoordelen kunnen in elke ruimte van je leven doordringen en je algemene welzijn op de lange termijn verbeteren.

Meditation Connects Us With Inner Peace And Joy

One of the most profound benefits of meditation is its power to connect us with inner peace, joy, wisdom, and freedom—that is wholly independent of external circumstances. Being rooted in this unconditioned and durable peace and freedom dramatically enhances our ability to navigate our lives skillfully.

The bright, awake awareness fully unveiled via meditation is the witness of the waking, dreaming, and deep-sleep states. It’s what remains constant throughout our nighttime and daytime experiences.

Beneficios De La Meditacin Que Te Harn Triunfar

Final actualizado el 17 de febrero de 2021

¿Qué puede ser más alto que alcanzar sus objetivos masivos? Bien, parece que la meditación, una cosa que posiblemente podría estar haciendo todos los días, sin cargo y con poco esfuerzo, ofrece ventajas que el éxito no puede transmitir. Las ventajas de la meditación pueden filtrarse en cada espacio de su vida y mejorar su bienestar general a largo plazo.

Mejore La Forma En Que Sus Capacidades Mentales

Una investigación de 2012 confirmó un proceso mental conocido como girificación que ocurre más en las personas que meditan.

La girificación es “el ‘plegamiento’ de la corteza cerebral debido al progreso, que a su vez podría permitir que la mente transmita información antes. Aunque el análisis no mostró esto de inmediato, los científicos sospechan que la girificación es responsable de mejorar la mente en el procesamiento de información, tomar decisiones, formar recuerdos y mejorar la consideración “.

Si eso no es suficiente, puede haber pruebas adicionales a partir de resonancias magnéticas de que la meditación puede reforzar las conexiones entre las células de la mente. Una investigación confirmó que la meditación “también podría estar relacionada con ajustes estructurales en áreas de la mente que podrían ser necesarias para el procesamiento sensorial, cognitivo y emocional. La información adicional recomienda que la meditación podría reflejar las disminuciones asociadas con la edad en la construcción cortical “.

En otras palabras, la meditación no solo puede hacer que su mente funcione más alto, sino que también puede desacelerar el proceso de envejecimiento de la mente.

Will Meditation Before Bed Help Me Sleep Better

There’s strong evidence to suggest that regular meditation can help improve your quality of sleep. Similarly to how exercise promotes physical health, exercising your mind is equally essential for our mental health. Some guided meditations can walk you through simple techniques to relax before bed; however, starting the simple habit of daily meditation can profoundly affect your sleep quality.

How Do Meditation And Mindfulness Affect Sleep

Mindfulness and meditation help bring about a relaxed state of mind that is conducive to falling asleep. This reaction is often described as the relaxation response, or the opposite of the stress response.

Whereas falling asleep involves a gradual reduction in , is often defined as a state of hyper-arousal. When we are stressed, depressed, or anxious, our brain stays “wired” and we find it more difficult to fall asleep. Over the long term, we perpetuate this tension as we start to associate bedtime with worries about not being able to fall asleep.

The state of acceptance and awareness invoked by meditation helps reduce psychological distress and improve rumination and emotion regulation. Studies on people with fibromyalgia have found that mindfulness helps patients manage anger, worry, anxiety, and depression. These researchers theorized that mindfulness may improve sleep quality by supplying patients with the mental resources to calm down the nervous system in preparation for sleep.

At a biological level, meditation slows the heart rate and breathing and lowers levels of , the stress hormone. Over the long term, the relaxation response reduces stress-related inflammation and oxidative stress and improves insulin resistance.

What To Expect When Meditating To Fall Asleep

Meditation for sleep should be approached the same way we approach meditation in the daytime: gently, with a relaxed focus. When we allow the body , and allow the mind to drift off, we do so in a soft, gentle way, not trying to force sleep, otherwise we encourage more thoughts and, possibly, some tension. As much as possible, allow yourself to be led by the guidance, not thinking too much about the technique or instructions.

Before you begin your sleep meditation: lie flat on your back on the bed, take a few deep breaths, and close your eyes, allowing the body to begin powering down. If you’re using a guided meditation, follow the instructions. If practicing unguided meditation, progress at your own pace. The more you practice this type of meditation, the more likely you are to build a quiet and restful mind that can sleep at ease.

The Benefits Of A Regular Meditation Practice

A great meditation practice increases all the benefits that come with a good night’s sleep. There are some benefits that you won’t get just by sleeping though.

These are some beneficial things that come out of having a regular meditating session:

Increased sense of calm

Increased awareness of your body

Increased awareness of other people’s emotions

More rational decision-making

Getting Good Sleep Is Crucial For Good Health

Most of us understand that getting a good night’s sleep is a good thing, but it may be much more important than you think. Research is showing that getting eight hours of natural, restful sleep per night is crucial for health and wellbeing. Specifically, not getting enough sleep can:

Make you more likely to gain weight. In fact, not getting enough sleep is a reliable predictor for obesity.

Put you at greater risk for heart disease and stroke.

Increase your risk for diabetes. In fact, in studies, healthy young people getting 4 hours of sleep for 6 nights in a row, showed symptoms of pre-diabetes.

Make you depressed. Short sleep and poor sleep quality are even linked to suicide.

Drastically increase your level of inflammation.

educe your ability to interact with people socially, and understand others.

These are just a few of the negative effects of not getting enough sleep. Obviously, getting good rest is incredibly important for your health and wellbeing. So how can you do that?

“The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.”

~ W.C. Fields

Deep Sleep Meditation Tip #1 Prepare For Bed

For sleep meditation to work, you will need to prepare yourself first. You should turn off your lights and put away your electronic devices.

If it helps, take a shower first so your body will feel more relaxed. Lie down on your bed afterward. Make sure you start your bedtime routine early enough to get plenty of sleep.

Meditation For Quality Sleep During The Day

falls into a unique category in that good quality Zzzs require much more than doing a simple meditation in bed. Restful sleep largely depends on having a rested mind, and so the preparation can begin with your mindset … during the day. More often than not, our issues around sleep are rooted in our thinking processes.

Headspace’s 30-day Sleep course , for example, isn’t designed to send you to sleep in the moment; it’s designed to change your relationship with sleep. By gradually training the mind in a specific way — day by day, for a month — you gradually create an environment conducive to a good night’s rest.

It’s recommended that the 30-day Sleep course be used during the day, in conjunction with the single sleep meditation at bedtime. The course trains the mind for long-term, sustainable change; the single meditation is a specific exercise to send you to sleep.

Verminder Isolatie En Voel Je Echt Verbonden

Het is ongebruikelijk dat binnen het tijdperk van vaste connectiviteit, isolement en eenzaamheid echt veel schrijnender kunnen voelen. Maar het komt zeker voor, en wanneer dat gevoel van isolement afdaalt, kan het overweldigend zijn.

Desalniettemin is bewezen dat meditatie emoties van eenzaamheid vermindert in een onderzoek bij oudere volwassenen, en degenen die transcendentale meditatie hebben beoefend, zelfs voor een heel korte tijd, zeggen dat het volgen van meditatie een gevoel van verbondenheid en volledigheid geeft, een “basisstadium van eenheid”.

Getting Started With Guided Sleep Meditation

Sleep Hygiene

Guided sleep meditation is a method for helping you to let go of worrying thoughts and relax your body before bed. Like other forms of meditation, this practice involves moving your focus away from your thoughts to sensations in your body. Regular practice of guided sleep meditation has been shown to improve sleep, meaning that this method is an important strategy that you can use to help reduce problems falling and staying asleep.

According to the American Sleep Association, around 30 percent of adults have short-term problems with insomnia, and about 10 percent have chronic difficulties with falling and/or staying asleep.?? What’s more, around a third of adults report typically getting less than 7 hours of sleep per night. Given that adults need 7 to 9 hours of sleep to function best, and teenagers need even more , it’s not surprising that methods for improving sleep are becoming more well-known.

Better sleep can contribute to lowering stress and an improved immune system. However, achieving restful sleep can be hard if you are battling stress and anxiety—it can be simply hard to quiet your mind. Many issues around sleep begin with your thinking processes at night. This is where guided sleep meditation can help.

What Types Of Meditation Work Best For Sleep

Meditation techniques for insomnia tend to incorporate breathing and mindfulness components, with a significant amount of overlap between methods. If you’re new to meditation, you can start by talking to a licensed practitioner, downloading an app, or looking up videos online to find a relaxation exercise that works for you. Some common meditation methods for sleep include:

Mindfulness Meditation: Most of the research on meditation for insomnia has been done on mindfulness meditation. Mindfulness involves focusing on the present and welcoming thoughts and emotions in an open-minded, non-judgmental manner.

Guided Imagery and Music: Guided meditation for insomnia promotes relaxation by asking the meditator to imagine themselves in a calming place, such as a white sandy beach or a forest. This is often accomplished with the help of a video recording or audio clip.

Body Scan Meditation: In body scan meditation, participants are instructed to focus on different parts of the body and note any sensations of pain or tension. This is closely tied to progressive muscle relaxation, in which participants actively tense and then relax each successive muscle.

Deep Breathing: Deep breathing while engaging the diaphragm is often used in combination with other meditation techniques to enhance relaxation. An example of this is the 4-7-8 breathing method, in which you breathe in for four seconds, hold your breath for seven seconds, then breathe out for eight seconds.

Sleep As An Autoregulatory Global Phenomenon

Sleep is reported to be associated with reduced heart rate, blood pressure, respiratory rate, and rhythm, oxygen consumption, anxiety or arousal, and an overall decrease in basal metabolic levels leading to a hypometabolic state. This phenomenon of sleep induced hypometabolic state is a natural and spontaneous outcome necessary for biological survival .

Meditation also brings a sustained hypometabolic state termed as relaxation response by Herbert Benson and helps in sleep initiation .

It has been hypothesized that meditation practices activate prefrontal cortex, fronto-limbic, fronto-parietal neural networks and limbic and paralimbic cortices associated with sympathetic arousal. Meditation practices activate structures like insula, anterior cingulate, and hypothalamus and bring about autonomic and humoral changes . Meditation thus produces a continuum of global regulatory changes at various behavioral levels favoring quality sleep.

The Difference Between Meditation And Sleep

Admit it, sometimes when you’re meditating you think to yourself, “Why don’t I just go to sleep instead?”There’s no shame in that! In fact, that’s part of the point of meditation—to rest and relax the mind—but sleep and meditation don’t affect the mind in the same way.

Here’s a more in-depth look at what happens to the brain during sleep vs a meditative state.

Meditation And Sleep Are Mutually Enhancing

Does this mean we should forego sleep entirely, in favor of meditation? Not at all! A good night’s sleep and deep meditation practice—while they’re not interchangeable—are mutually enhancing.

Being well-rested from a good night’s sleep lessens the chances of falling asleep during your meditation session. And one of the benefits of regular meditation practice is how it enhances your sleep.

So we might consider meditation and sleep to be akin to our right and left hands: while they’re not identical, they do work together beautifully.

What Happens In The Brain During Meditation

The biggest difference between meditation and sleep is that while meditating, you’re consciously focusing your mind on something.

What you’re focusing on doesn’t matter for the purpose of this article, but what does matter is the fact that your brain is active during this process.

Your Brain Waves Change

Beta waves are the brainwaves that are usually around when the brain is processing information.

When you meditate, these waves decrease, showing that the analytical, reasoning, and planning part of our brain takes a backseat.

and theta waves are most active during meditation, and they’re usually sleepy-waves.

This means that your brain activity is mimicking that of a sleeping brain. No wonder meditation has a reputation of being amazing for relaxation!

The Grey Matter Increases

Meditation is kind of like giving your brain a workout. The more you do it, the more your brain responds to it, and grows just like your biceps would when doing bicep curls.

It would seem that comparing brains of meditators and non-meditators indicates an increase in grey matter for those who do partake.

Grey matter occurs in certain parts of the brain, mainly in the hippocampus , but also in areas that are responsible for emotion regulation, reflection, mental flexibility, and self-awareness.

Rewiring of Neural Pathways

Rewiring of neural pathways is something that happens if you meditate regularly.

This Is The Best App By Far For Mindfulness

It’s almost embarrassing to say this, but I have been a “meditator” for about 30 years and I have to say that I never really got very much out of doing it. I tried so hard, but I’m finding out I never truly understood that “trying” to be a good meditator or mindful person, was missing what doing this was about. What I’m learning through this app is that “mindfulness” is about me – understanding myself first, and it’s a lot about acceptance. So with that understanding and acceptance I can begin to see “things” so much more clearly and why previous ways of thinking, particularly about myself, were holding me back from living my life and loving myself. And I’m finding that the more I practice self acceptance, the fears about living fully and going after what I want out of my life, are disappearing. The previous version of myself is rapidly becoming someone I only used to know, and this new ME is much more in line with who I’d always wanted to be. I’m able to try and do so much more, all while in the comfort that I am lovable, even if I fail at something. I simply dust myself off and try some more.This app has completely changed me and the way I’m able to appreciate all the good that’s in my life. And I’m worthy of going after the things I want for my life, while freeing me up to share my gifts with others and society in general.If this is where you find your life stalling out, this app will bring you back to yourself.

How To Control Sleep During The Meditation

Here is what I did for controlling my sleep during Meditation:Usually, I always did my Meditation at night time, because I found that night time is more peaceful and mind is so quiet this time. But the problem was that I was always tired by night time and my mind always gave the order to the body to sleep. But I changed my to control my mind. First of all, I did not take any heavy meal and I took more and more water every day. Just before the Meditation, I used to walk for some steps fastly, and after sometimes I splashed the face with cold water. Meditation gives us more than what is not in the list of our desires so I always gave more priority to Meditation. I separated my place of Meditation from the bed. For some days, before Meditation, I chewed some cardamom that helped me to do more meditation. I kept my eyelids straight while doing Meditation because if the direction of is downwards, you may sleep. I focused on my third eye and prayed to God that I am doing something for awareness, so, please bless me with amazing results.I to myself when I was dozing off or snoring and said to myself that I am not on the earth for sleeping, I am here to awakening. The mind needs practice, so It took some time but in the end, I overcame.

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Verminder Tekenen Van Angst En Melancholie

Meditatie kan je helpen om je verwant te voelen en met stress om te gaan, maar hoe zit het met een aanhoudende nervositeitsstoornis? Hoe zit het met overweldigende ongunstige emoties of dat slopende gevoel van melancholie?

Goed, een onderzoek onder middelbare scholieren bevestigde dat een voordelen van mindfulness en meditatie veel bij elk zouden kunnen helpen: studenten die met een mindfulness-programma werden betrapt, “vertoonden verminderde tekenen van stress, nervositeit en melancholie, elk onmiddellijk na en 6 maanden daarna systeem”.

How Often Should You Meditate For Insomnia

Meditation is a skill, and those who practice it more often tend to see more meaningful benefits. Studies on the relaxation response have found that it produces immediate psychological and physical effects, suggesting that daily practice is optimal in order to see effects on that night’s sleep.

While factors such as the minutes spent meditating and the quality of meditation are difficult to quantify, the benefits of meditation have been found to be enhanced in long-term practitioners.

Similarly, a study on the benefits of meditation for insomnia in breast cancer patients found that these benefits disappeared after 12 months. These results suggest that the greatest benefits are derived from consistent meditation over a long period of time.

What Are Some Other Benefits Of Meditation

Meditation is perhaps best known for its ability to reduce anxiety, depression, and pain.

Along the same lines, emerging research is uncovering potential benefits on quality of life for patients with fibromyalgia, , breast cancer, and irritable bowel syndrome. Preliminary evidence indicates that meditation may also play a role in preventing cognitive decline, quitting smoking, and lowering blood pressure.

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Reducir Los Signos De Ansiedad Y Melancola

La meditación puede ayudarlo a sentirse relacionado y lidiar con el estrés, pero ¿qué pasa con una disfunción de nerviosismo en curso? ¿Qué pasa con las abrumadoras emociones desfavorables o esa debilitante sensación de melancolía?

Correctamente, una investigación realizada en estudiantes universitarios de secundaria confirmó que a las ventajas de la atención plena y la meditación podrían ser de gran ayuda para cada uno: los estudiantes universitarios que participaron en un programa de atención plena “mostraron una disminución de los signos de estrés, nerviosismo y melancolía instantáneamente después y 6 meses después de esto sistema”.

What Happens In The Body During Meditation

Don’t be fooled into thinking that meditation only affects the mind. Even though it’s not quite the same thing as having a nap, there are things that happen in the body too when you meditate properly.

Cortisol Levels Drop

Just like when you’re asleep, the stress hormones in your body decrease when you meditate effectively.

This is highly useful as you’re now replicating the very thing that gives your body space to heal when it’s sleeping. It follows naturally from there, then, that your body’s healing ability is increased when you meditate.

Heart Rate & Breathing Slow Down

Along with the reduction in stress-hormone comes a relaxation in your body’s fight-or-flight response.

Your heart rate slows and breathing is regulated naturally, and your body can enter a state of rest.

Will Meditation Improve Your Sleep Tonight

“People will commonly try a meditation practice for a night or a few nights, and not notice a difference, but sleep naturally varies night to night,” says Goldstein.

He suggests keeping a daily log of things like sleep quality; meditation; naps; exercise; substances like alcohol, caffeine, or medications you take; time you get into bed; time you turn off the lights; middle-of-the-night wake-ups; how long it takes to fall asleep; and what time you get up in the morning. Try to notice patterns in how certain behaviors affect your sleep over time and give any new changes a week before judging if they’re helpful.

“Mindfulness meditation is not a one and done thing—it’s a continual practice.”

It’s also crucial to see your doctor for a sleep assessment if you’re really struggling. If an underlying condition like sleep apnea is the root of your tossing and turning, then meditation isn’t going to be your fix. An evaluation can help determine what’s really interfering with your shuteye and help you and your physician come up with an individualized treatment plan, says Goldstein.

If that plans includes mindfulness or meditation, patience and consistency are crucial. “People want to do it once and have it just work,” says Klatt. “Mindfulness meditation is a practice that you have to really bring to your whole life. It’s not a one and done thing—it’s a continual practice.”

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How Meditation Helps With Emotional Health

Scientific research has found a positive correlation between meditation and a host of fantastic benefits. Everything from sleep and concentration, to memory and learning can be improved by implementing a steady meditation practice. It can even help with depression1.

Here’s a look at how you can start a meditation practice and begin taking advantage of these wonderful benefits.

But first — let’s better define what exactly meditation is.

Meditation Can Be More Restful Than Sleep

What may surprise you to learn is that in deep meditation, the level of rest that the body receives can be two to five times deeper than what it receives in the deepest part of sleep.

That’s right—meditation can be relaxing and therapeutic than sleep!

And when the body is resting deeply, the mind also can more easily come to sleep, and release long-held anxiety, stress, clutter, and mental fatigue. And this leads to feeling more calm and relaxed when we rise after a meditation session.

Resultados Optimistas Incluso Sin Meditar

Los investigadores han descubierto que la forma en que la meditación ayuda a tu mente a trabajar más alto es constante, permaneciendo contigo no solo si estás sentado en un cojín con los ojos cerrados, sino de forma regular. Según el análisis, “las consecuencias del entrenamiento de meditación sobre el procesamiento emocional posiblemente cambiarían a estados no meditativos”.

Los investigadores señalan que esto puede implicar ocasionalmente que las ventajas de la meditación no deben ser específicas de una actividad o estímulo seguro , sino que son específicas del proceso, lo que significa que “podrían terminar en ajustes duraderos en el desempeño psicológico”. . “

Step #1: Setting Up The Right Environment

The first step of meditating before bed is preparing the right environment. The ideal environment should be calm, quiet, and free of distractions. It may be helpful to create a set nightly routine to make the process easier.

Here are some tips for creating a relaxing setting:

Remove distractions. Turn off the TV, make sure the kids are in bed, and put down your recreational electronic devices. Make sure your meditation space is quiet and dark .

Get comfortable. Wear whatever you find most comfortable. Choose a posture that limits fidgeting and discomfort; you may either lay down in bed or sit up.

Set up your meditation tools. If you’re using your phone or another device to listen to a guided meditation program, turn down the screen brightness and close all other apps or windows. If you use a white noise machine, turn it on at a comfortable volume. It’s important to keep your meditative time free of distractions, so ensure your environment is set up with everything you’ll need before getting started.

Some find that candles are helpful when creating a soothing setting. If you want to use candles, make sure you blow them out before falling asleep.

Differences Between Sleep And Meditation

After a few regular meditations, meditators usually realize that sleep and meditation are quite distinct states. Coming out of sleep, one feels a little dull. But emerging from the deeply settled “no mind” state, one basks in clarity, and feels peaceful and often joyous.

Also, the breathing patterns during deep sleep and meditation are quite different. Deeper states of meditation are associated with very feeble breath or even suspension of breath, whereas in sleep, respiration does reduce, but less.

During your meditations, please don’t try to figure out whether you were sleeping or deeply meditating at certain times. Doing so could interfere with the innocence of the meditation process. The statement, “whatever happens is fine,” shows the best attitude.

The key distinction between meditation and sleep is alertness in meditation and non-alertness during sleep. But meditative alertness has a different quality than that of the waking state. To understand that distinction, and also how meditation and sleep are different, we need to consider how the four modes of consciousness—mind, intellect, memory, and ego—operate in the waking, dreaming, and sleeping states and also in the fourth state of consciousness, which is experienced in meditation, traditionally called the state.

Week 3 Of Sleep Meditation: Appreciation

On Day 16, my appreciation for sleep meditation hit an all-time high. A few minutes in to my sleep story, I noticed my attention effortlessly shifted from what had happened that day and what I had to do the next day to the story. It was almost like the person leading the sleep story gave me the permission I needed to let go of the day and let my mind and body go to sleep—instantly. I started looking forward to my sleep meditations—a sign any seasoned meditator will tell you is one that means your new meditation habit will likely stick.

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Meditation Autonomic Activity And Sleep

Changes in autonomic activity had been reported with respect to specific sleep states with predominant parasympathetic activity in SWS and sympathetic activity during REM sleep . Vipassana meditation practices would have activated the anterior cingulate cortex and hence modulated the parasympathetic activity during sleep. These reports are suggestive of a positive modulatory role of meditation in sleep through autonomic functions.

Why Do I Fall Asleep During Meditation

Sleeping while doing Meditation is one of the common errors or obstacle occur when a beginner yogi starts the Meditation Practices in life. Does this happen with you that you are doing a Meditation listening to the beautiful music or and after 20 minutes you wake up when the music is already finished and some drool is spread on your face and you remember that you just now? If yes, it is a very common obstacle while a yogi starts the Meditation practice. I remember while doing Meditation in 2009, my mother used to give me a glass of milk after dinner, and I kept it aside to cool. After that, I wrote something in the diary, took some sips of Milk, and decided to meditate with music. Immediately after 20 Minutes listening to the beautiful Indian Flute and Sitar meditation music I was sleeping sitting in meditation pose. After some time, I snored and so on, suddenly I realize that I have to meditate, I woke up, Meditate for some time and again the same. Finally, I decided to sleep well and I took the same milk in Morning when I wake up.

Verbeter De Mogelijkheden Van Uw Geest

Een onderzoek uit 2012 bevestigde dat een geestesloop bekend als gyrificatie extra plaatsvindt bij mensen die mediteren.

Gyrificatie is ‘het ‘vouwen’ van de hersenschors vanwege vooruitgang, wat op zijn beurt de geest in staat zou kunnen stellen sneller informatie te verwerken. Hoewel de analyse dit niet onmiddellijk aantoonde, vermoeden wetenschappers dat gyrificatie ten laste wordt gelegd omdat het de geest hoger maakt in het verwerken van informatie, het maken van keuzes, het vormen van herinneringen en het verbeteren van overweging.

Als dat niet voldoende is, kan er aanvullend bewijs zijn van MRI-scans dat meditatie verbindingen tussen hersencellen kan versterken. Eén onderzoek bevestigde dat meditatie “ook te maken kan hebben met structurele aanpassingen in gebieden van de geest die nodig kunnen zijn voor zintuiglijke, cognitieve en emotionele verwerking. De aanvullende informatie suggereert dat meditatie een indruk kan maken van leeftijdsgerelateerde achteruitgang in corticale constructie.

Met andere woorden, meditatie kan niet alleen je geest hoger laten werken, maar het kan ook het ouder worden in de hele geest vertragen.