#and she was like well they're just moving it and i got hysterical bc i knew they were going to ruin my dryer

[confinesofmy]

just woke up from the kind of nightmare that makes you say oh THAT was traumatising? i didn't know that.

[hyunsuks-beanie]

It'll Always Be You

Lee Felix × reader; angst, but with a fluffy ending; 2923 words; lovers to exes and back

A/N So Felix has me feeling all sorts of things today, bc of how good he looked during the performance. So here's a scenario for our Sunshine!

"Here's your order and have a nice day," you smile to the female customer in front of you, before handing a pack of cookies to her child. Once the leave, you let out a sigh and look at your best friend who's cleaning the counter next to you. "All done for today!," you exclaim, to which your friend looks up and smiles, before taking off and folding her apron. "So, what are your plans for tonight?," she asks, making you give her a knowing look. She to her eyes before saying, "How long are you gonna stay cooped up inside your house? The break up was two years ago for heaven's sake, you need to start living your life again." "Hey, I am living my life, it's just that, unlike you, I am not interested in going out and meeting new people every day. I meet enough strangers while working here, so there's no need to go clubbing daily," you shrug.

When all she does in reply is pout, you chuckle and say, "Okay, how about we go for a movie tomorrow? My treat." Her face lights up at that, and she gives you a tight hug before saying, "I really want to meet your ex once though, just so I can break his nose." You giggle "Oh he's dead and gone."

Oh, if only you knew.

Once you send your friend off, you start tidying up your little bakery up. This was the place that helped you get over your breakup, which had been messy to say the least. You had immersed yourself fully in your work, because you knew it was one thing that would never hurt you or break your trust.

You sigh lovingly at the memories of setting up and running your bakery, turning your back against the front door. And just as you are reminiscing you hear the door open, causing you to turn. The moment you do so, however, you regret it, because standing there, staring at you wide-eyed, is your ex, otherwise known as Stray Kids' Lee Felix. You both continue to stare at each other for a while, before he finally breaks the silence (and your trance) by whispering, "Y/N."

You clear your throat, and say, "I'm sorry, but we're closed for the day." He rushes to the and hurriedly replies, "Please, it's rather urgent. My friend Hyunjin is really craving some blueberry pie, and he refuses fo join practice before I bring him what he wants." "I told you, I'm sorry, but I can't help you today. You can come back tomorrow though," you say, not looking into his eyes. "Please Y/N, Chan hyung is getting really angry, he's gonna ground me along with Hyunjin," Felix reasons, and you find yourself giving in to his pleading eyes and pouty lips.

"Fine, wait a minute," you say, making him crack a smile. Boy have you missed that smile of his, you think, before mentally slapping yourself for still not being able to resist him, even though he broke your heart to pieces when he broke up with you over the phone two years ago, telling you that he could no longer do long distance with you being all the way in Australia. It wasn't the breakup that hurt you though, it was the fact that he had found someone better and closer to him, or so he said.

Little did you know, though, that the company had he had never really found anyone else, that he didn't want to find anyone else. The company had made him lie to you when they came to know he was secretly dating. He tried to put up a fight, but the company started threatening him about the group facing consequences. He knew you'd see right through him if he told you the truth, so he had to lie to you in order to make you hate him, just so you could move on in life. He meant well, but he never knew he hurt you so bad that you'd give up on dating and love altogether.

"Here you go," you say while handing him his parcel. He thanks you, while contemplating if he should make small talk. Mustering up the courage, he asks, "How have you been?", while looking down. "Fine," you reply, "Congrats on the comeback." His head snaps up at that, as he says, "I didn't know you knew I had a comeback," "It was all over the news, Felix. Stray Kids are really making it big," you swallow before adding, "Your partner must be really proud of you," complete with a fake smile plastered on your face.

Felix winces at your words, not knowing what to say. In the end, he settles with, "How long have you been running this bakery?" "Since about a month after we broke up." When he gives you a confused expression, you sigh and add, "I was kinda already about to move to Seoul when you told me that you had found someone else. I was gonna surprise you, but you ended up surprising me instead."

"Y/N, I-I never knew. I'm so sorry, I-," he says, but you cut him off. "I-I t-think you should leave," you say, with tears threatening to spill. "Let me explain, please. I swear I'll come clean, please, just give me a chance." "No Felix, I can't give you any chance, you blew it up when you hurt me so bad that it made scared of ever loving again. Please.....j-just go," you say, shutting your eyes close. Dejected, he turns around to leave, but not before saying, "I'm sorry," one more time. Once he leaves, you sink down to the floor, crying. "Why did you have to ruin me so bad?," You whisper.

You don't, however, notice that just outside the door, Felix too, is crying hysterically as he gets into his car.

Upon reaching the JYP building, Felix rushes to the washroom to try and dry his eyes and hide any signs that he's been crying. "I still love you. I never stopped, but gosh, why did I have to be such an idiot to let you go? And that too, in the worst way possible?," he says to his reflection in the mirror, thinking back to your broken expression. Slamming his fist against the sink, he curses at himself.

Once he's finally sobered up a little, Felix goes back to the practice room to give Hyunjin his pie. Though he has half a mind to just call in sick and go home and weep, he knows the group needs him. "Here you go, Hyun," he forces a smile onto his face when Hyunjin thanks him. Chan notices his slumped shoulders, but shrugs it off as tiredness. "Now that everyone is satisfied, can we get back to practice?," he asks. Once all the boys agree, rehearsals begin again, but Felix can't find it in himself to focus. He keeps making mistakes, which finally results in Chan stopping the music, grabbing his hand, and taking him out the practice room and to his studio.

"What is it, Lix? You've been distracted ever since you came back from the bakery. Come on, I know something is bothering you, it isn't like you to lose focus. Tell me what it is," Chan says, sternly but gently, his concern for the younger boy evident. "It's nothing, hyung. I'm just tired," Felix tries to evade the question, but Chan presses on. "I'm not buying that, and I'm not gonna have you distracted during performances or practices, either. I can't risk you injuring yourself or any of the boys, so I'm saying again. Spit. It. Out. Leader's orders."

Felix sighs, running a hand through his hair. After a pause, he finally says, "I saw Y/N today. The bakery, it is owned by them." Chan's eyes go wide at this, since he's the only one who knows the circumstances under which you both broke up, and is also the only one who knows about how much Felix regrets letting you go, in the worst possible way. "What happened? Were they....rude to you? Or did they do something?" "What? No hyung, they were nothing but nice to me. We made small talk, and they told me that they were planning to surprise me by moving to Seoul, when I broke up with them. I hurt them so bad that they are scared of ever loving again," Felix says, taking shaky breaths between sentences as tears welled up in his eyes again.

"I messed up so bad hyung, you know I still love them. They're the nicest, most perfect, most lovable person I've ever known, and I damaged them so badly, gosh I feel so guilty," he breaks down again, causing Chan to wrap his arms around him, giving him a shoulder to cry on. Once Felix calms down, Chan says, "You know what you have to do now, right?" "What do you mean?"

"You say you still love them. You say you're guilty. But instead of telling these things to me, you need to tell this to them. Apologize to them, tell them the whole story. Tell them there was never anyone else, and that it's always been them. You didn't fight for them back then, because you were worried for us. But you can fight for them now, because we got your back. Win them back, Lix. Make up for your mistake."

"B-but hyung, why would they ever want to take me back again? I've been nothing but a jerk to them." "Well, in that case, you can't blame them. But they deserve to at least know the truth. They deserve to know that your intentions were not wrong. If they choose to walk away after that, they will at least have had gotten closure. Who knows, it might help them muster the courage to go out and love again. You owe this to them, Lix."

Chan succeeded in knocking some sense into Felix, as the next day, the younger boy found himself in front of your bakery, preparing a long speech explaining why he did what he did to you. He's so engrossed in his thoughts that he doesn't notice your best friend walk out the bakery and stand next to him. "Uhm, are you okay?," she asks, surprising him. "O-oh, uh-uhm, yeah," says Felix, while noticing her uniform, that's identical to yours. "Do you work with Y/N?" "Yeah, we're friends and partners, and on most days, we work together. But they called in sick today, and told me they'd cover the evening shift. How do you know them though?"

To this, Felix finds himself at a loss for words, but he figures if he's gonna come clean to you, he needs an ally. And what better person than your best friend? So he takes down his mask slightly, making your friend gasp in response. "You Felix from Stray Kids! What are you doing here?" "I-I came here to meet Y/N. We broke up two years ago due to a mistake I made, but I need to explain things to them. They deserve to know the truth." He looks up to see your friend glaring at him, as she says, "That was you? You broke my best friend's heart? How could you? I'm not letting you anywhere near them, you jerk"

"Please, just give me 5 minutes, and I'll explain everything to you. Then you can decide if I deserve one more chance." When your friend doesn't say anything, Felix launches into his own version of things, explaining himself and his actions. Once he's done, your friend is still glaring at him, but he notices a smile tugging at her lips.

"You have been nothing but a complete and utter jerk to them. And honestly, you deserve to get your ass kicked by them. But I know that they still love you, and the way you are repenting what you did tells me that you love them too. So I give you my blessing. They'll be here in the evening at 6, be here before then." Felix hugs her super tight at that, with the biggest smile plastered on his face while thanking her. She adds, "But if you hurt them again, I swear I'm gonna murder you with my own two hands." "It won't come to that, I promise."

Felix arrives at the bakery at 10 minutes to six, and the moment he enters, your friend shoves him into the kitchen, asking him to stay there till you come. Once she leaves, he starts pacing up and down, raking his hand nervously through his hair. He tries to prepare what he is going to say, but gives up when he realizes that it would all go out the window when he sees you.

Meanwhile, the moment you step inside the bakery, your friend pretends to be busy setting stuff up on the counter, and asks you to bring in some things from the kitchen. Unassuming, you start walking towards the kitchen doors, when she notices your swollen eyes and exclaimed "Babe, have you been crying?" You muster up a fake smile and tell him that it's just you not feeling well, but unknown to you, Felix heard your friend, and guilt washes over him again. But he doesn't have time to wallow in it, as soon after, you step in.

The way your expression morphs into one of pure sadness breaks his heart into a million pieces, and when you say, "What more do you want from me?" while holding back tears, it takes everything in him to stop from falling to his knees and begging forgiveness. He tries to speak, but you hold up a finger, indicating you aren't finished. "Now that you've found me again, was it not enough for you to have me admit that what you did to me made me stop believing in love? Do you even want to rub it in my face by telling me how happy your are with your partner? If that is so, then please, just get lost, I'm begging you."

Tears are now streaming down your face, and Felix finds himself saying, "Just please. Let me explain. You deserve to know the truth and my feelings and intentions. If after that, you want me to leave, I swear, you will never have to see me again." You can't look at him, but when you don't reply, he says, "I promise that this is the real truth behind what I did. Please hear me out. I lied when I said I had found someone else. There is no 'someone else,' and there never will be one. The only person I've loved, the only person I still love, is you. It'll always be you."

"The company made me break up with you, and threatened me that the group will face consequences if I didn't do as they had asked. I that that if I outright told you the real reason, it would hurt you. And so, I decided to lie to you in order to make you hate me, even if it broke my heart. But never did I ever think that it would damage you so badly, and I know I've been stupid, but I can't help but ask for you to forgive me, and give me one last chance. I know I've been a total jerk to you, and even now, I'm being nothing but selfish, but I just want you to know that I still love you. I'll understand if you want nothing to do with me, and I'll walk away forever. But you deserved to get closure, and I hope that if you do choose to give up on me, you will now be able to love again, and trust again."

By the time he stops talking, the both of you are sobbing hard. You ask him, "Are you done?" When he nods, you say, "You say that you will walk away if I choose to give up on you. But do you really think I'll be able to give up on you? If I couldn't stop loving you even when you broke up with me in the cruelest way possible, what makes you think I'll stop loving you now that I know that you went through the same pain as me? You knew what the truth was, and you still had to hide it. I can only imagine how hurtful that must have been, Felix. I hate myself for believing your stupid lie, for ever doubting the love you had for me. I'm sorry, and I forgive you."

Felix looks up at you, surprised. It takes him some time to process your words, and when he does, he asks you, "What does that mean....for us?" To this, you shyly reply, "Well, I never stopped loving you, and if you didn't either, then should we give us another try?" Felix smiles the brightest he has in ages, as he slowly comes closer to you. Cupping your face, he wipes off your tears, as you proceed to do the same. "I promise I'll never let you go again," he says softly. You giggle and say, "You'd do well to keep that promise," before biting your lip.

"Is it okay if I kiss you?," he asks. You nod in response, causing him to gently place his lips on yours. And for the first time in a while, you feel like you're home.

[himbodiaz]

ok no but I'm shaking bc eddie has never seen buck freak out abt his before (assuming he hasn't seen the footage of the well) and so like,,,,it's gonna affect him so deeply. obviously he knows buck cares about him, they're best friends and partners how could he not know, but I don't think he's aware of,,,how deep it runs or how devoted buck is. and so now I'm thinking abt eddie getting out of it safe, and buck practically sprinting up to him and hugging him so tight eddie can't breathe and saying "if you ever pull that again I'm never speaking to you, you scared the hell out of me" or smthg and then eddie thinks abt how buck was screaming his name and can't breathe for a totally different reason. bc he knows buck cares, and that it's in buck's nature to care deeply for people, but he's never seen it towards himself, just other people and I just,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,smthg abt eddie realizing buck cares just as deeply abt him as he does abt buck is,,,,it's gonna destroy me

okay. okay listen. eddie knows that buck loves him, but in the ranking of people who buck loves, eddie definitely sees maddie as the number one person buck loves above all else. maddie practically raised him, and she's loved him her whole life. and then eddie saw how absolutely wrecked buck was when maddie was kidnapped. how completely reckless and lacking in any self-preservation, and he probably thought "that is what buck looks like when he's completely destroyed"

and then the tsunami happened. and when eddie saw buck at the field hospital, he could immediately tell that something was wrong, and not just because buck was bloody, and muddy, and there, when he was supposed to be somewhere warm and dry with chris. buck's whole demeanour, how he was talking to eddie, how he couldn't get the words out to tell eddie what had happened, was absolutey devastated--not because chris is eddie's son, but because buck and chris have their own relationship independent of eddie. and so in eddie's mind, chris is higher up than him on buck's ranking of people he loves.

so then, the well collapses. and everyone knows how buck screamed in absolute anguish, how he threw himself to the ground, how he wanted to dig through forty feet of dirt and mud and earth by hand to get to eddie. but eddie doesn't know. doesn't know how quiet and stoic and not really there buck was, until he saw eddie again. all eddie knows is the smile that plastered itself across his best friend's face upon seeing him. all eddie knows is that hysterical laugh that escaped from buck when he saw him. all eddie knows is how tightly buck held onto him.

and then eddie gets shot. he's there, he sees buck, but i don't think he really saw him. because no matter how long he stared, how he reached for buck, i don't think he really processed what buck's reaction meant. or if he did, he didn't fully understand it. because when maddie was kidnapped, he didn't stop moving until he found her again. when chris was swept away in the tsunami, he searched for him until his body gave out. when eddie got trapped in the well, buck threw himself on the ground and clawed at the earth.

but eddie gets shot, and buck is frozen. buck cannot move to even get himself to safety, let alone eddie. and when he can finally process what has happened, he crawls under a ladder truck, he crawls toward gunfire, to get eddie, all the while calling to him, voice hoarse and absolutely devastated.

still, eddie doesn't know. eddie sees buck covered in blood, and asks if he's hurt, and then he falls unconscious. and eddie doesn't know. eddie doesn't know how his death would be the one thing that would change buck beyond recognition.

but eddie being taken hostage, being held at gunpoint, where he is still conscious, and aware. when he can hear the anguish in buck's voice, when he can see buck trying to get to him, no matter the risk to himself. that is when he'll see (or start to see) just how deeply buck loves him, how much buck would do for him, the absolute devotion buck has for eddie.

so, when eddie finally gets free, when they can finally reach each other again, eddie is pulling buck in just as tightly. because now? now, he knows

[deadendtracks]

Its bugging me that Ada basically told Tommy he's not himself bc he's not drinking whisky. I mean she saw how messed up he was and told him to throw out the opium and she must know that he attempted suicide? How is this not a positive thing? He's clear headed and not standing on bridges, so that's a plus right? That whole convo with her was weird to me. Does his family really not get him at all? This season is depressing af (thanks for listening :)

well, i think there's a lot going on.

part of it is due to the fact that the entire family -- Ada and Lizzie included -- are alcoholics, or at the very least have dysfunctional relationships to the stuff. so tommy being sober is a big disruption of the family dynamic on that level alone. it calls into question their own relationships to alcohol. they all bond via social drinking, they call a bar home base, etc. Opium was something above and beyond whisky -- whisky they all understand and accept as normal; cocaine is normalized as well to a lesser extent. Opium and heroin and laudanum are not, are seen as harder drugs I think. That would probably take another post to unpack.

secondly, no, his family doesn't get him and never has, since the war. he came back different, he's always behaving in ways they don't understand or trust, they regularly express doubts about his motivations, etc. this is just another change -- and one that in a way is more disruptive than the war even, because my guess is they were all heavy drinkers from adolescence so it's a part of Tommy and of the family dynamic that predated the war, it's something reassuringly familiar that he's torn away.

Another layer is that sure, he's alive and clearheaded and not standing on any bridges but it's pretty obvious he's not thrilled to still be here. It wasn't by choice, even if he's made the choice not to go through with suicide again. Polly's death had to have made it even harder to stick around. Lizzie talks about his dead voice, and how he behaves as if he's watching everything on a screen. Arthur talks about his smile, Ada wants to know where her brother is -- honestly he's been like that since season 1 to a certain extent, but I think this signals it's been noticably increased for his family to have picked up on it and worried about it.

He's monofocused on whatever his plan is to the exclusion of everything else. Lizzie talks about how he moves from one thing to another like she's just part of another list -- which signals that he wasn't always like this with her. while i don't think he's dramatically different he is definitely speaking in a way that's more deliberate, almost robotic, a lot of the time. So much of what he says comes across as rehearsed. Again, this isn't totally new either, but that was the most obvious change to me. Like someone else said, he's going through the motions.

On the other hand, look at the conversation on the phone with Lizzie when he freaked the fuck out about what was going on with Ruby -- that was really different behavior for him, it comes across as irrational to Lizzie, he escalates to an inch from hysterical in a very short time -- and Lizzie isn't totally shocked by it. by the content of what he's saying, yes, but not by his emotional outburst. Which is probably something that's happened now that he's sober and not self-medicating all the time, the shit that he was numbing comes out in ways that he has much less control over. there's a lot of trauma that he doesn't have the usual means to cope with any more and that's got to have had an impact on his behavior.

But really I think it's his thwarted act of suicide that has alarmed his family, and rather than look too closely at that, they're focusing on the thing that won't let them forget any of it -- his sobriety. My guess is they don't talk about how he tried to kill himself, but they can talk about how he only drinks water, you know? The suicide though, that's something they can't just pass off as Tommy being Tommy, oh he came back from the war that way -- I really think that for ten years his family was unsettled by his behavior but it was way too easy for them to look the other way at the fact that he was clearly fucked up. He was so functional (to a terrifying extent) and he was the one keeping the family together and he'd brought them so much success and power. To look at the toll on him directly, to confront it, was too much. They all relied on him to keep it together and to keep them afloat. But now there's this evidence that somethings' really wrong, and they can't pretend it's not there any more.

anyway wow i rambled a lot and still feel like i haven't covered everything but i'll stop here.

[wovenstarlight]

ahhhh yes that makes sense ty!! honestly my first instinct was dragon and then i was like ?? not sure if he counts HAHA bc she didn't really noona him ever. and then i was like dokja? but they're equal levels of trash gremlins so i was like ig 1863 namwoon? anyway much appreciated~ your au is very interesting 👀

sdfbsfb oh my god the idea of regular hsy ever noona-ing regular kdj is sending me into hysterics. both of them would die. its gotta be either abfd, 1863 knw, or lgy+sys she's noona to

but actually. speaking of kdj. and this au. For you lol

(on ao3)

*

Sung Hyunjae has just turned twenty when he passes out on the stairs at home.

Well, that’s not good, he thinks, watching the floor tilt under him, and then he blacks out quite abruptly before his head ever makes contact with the ground.

But he’s not quite lost consciousness altogether. He just appears to have been… moved to some sort of void.

Less than ideal, he allows.

Then the transcendental presence shows up. She seems pretty annoyed.

“You’re the one who knocked me out,” he observes. Now she seems kind of surprised.

There’s a pressure bearing down on him suddenly, planet-heavy and ready to crush him like so much dirt. She has to be joking. He pulls together the memory of his wall, and a screen of light flickers to life around him, the pressure sliding clean off without touching him. “We can talk this out, if you’d like.”

The screen stops sparking, but he doesn’t lower it. Not yet. He waits.

Su-ng Hyu-n-jae.

The voice comes into his head, broken and suspicious. It’s almost nostalgic. He eases up on the wall just a touch. “What about him?”

You- are Sung- Hyunjae.

Easier to understand, now. “Who’s asking?”

Not important.

Well, if she wants to play it like that. He peers through his wall into the pitch darkness.

“Moonlight,” he murmurs, and gets a spark of shock for his effort. It illuminated something. Once again, then. “You’ve got something with you.” Shock blending into anger. Aha; too much anger. Again. “Someone?” Shock. Again. “Hm. A powerful someone.”

Reading people takes some energy, but not as much as the next trick he’s about to try. He places a hand on his wall, or whatever he’s parsing as the hand of his form in this mindscape, and pours the dregs of his magic through it, calling on all the memories he can summon from his last life. The mana seeps into the wall, and from the other side an electric question pierces through the void, a line of searing blue letters lighting up the darkness for a split second.

The moonlight’s little someone answers. Answers in kind. Sung Hyunjae raises his eyebrows.

“No wonder,” he says, and smiles. “Sorry. This body’s taken.”

The moonlight is furious. Or frustrated. Or perhaps terrified. He’d read her to make sure, but he exhausted his available stores with that last aura strike, and he’s not keen on pushing himself further. In a world as dry of magic as this one, he’s already guaranteed himself a week of bedrest at least. He’d rather not make it a month.

Mine.

He waits.

MINE.

“As I said, this body’s taken.”

Another- like- yours.

“My family isn’t like me.” Well, most of it, anyway, save for—

He realizes too late that his wall is dropping. Shit. Shit, he drained himself more than he thought. Moonlight shines through it and presses down on him, icy-cold like drowning. He chokes as she drags the stray end of his last thought straight out of him.

Found- it.

He drops the wall and pours everything into a storm of raw light aimed straight at her core. Her scream follows him into true darkness.

(If his senses weren’t already fading, he’d say her little someone seemed satisfied.)

[wtfwriter]

hey, i was wondering if you could write a fic about will coming out to el and being super upset about it, but el not knowing what being gay is and when will like hysterically explains it to her she has a epiphany where she’s like, i think i like girls

will and el best siblings mwah

also sry for how long this took, getting a year older makes me go into crisis mode lmao i can't even begin to count how many times I started and stopped writing this

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Synopsis: Will comes out to El. She has a few questions.

Hurt/Comfort, Fluff

Extra Info: They're in California so this is set between seasons 3 and 4 but El and Mike aren't together, pretend them split bc long distance is difficult or smt idk, Mention of elmax, I also used a very binary way of explaining 'gay' and 'lesbian' but i do 100% support nonbinary lesbians/gay people as i am one lol it was just a bit easier to have it explained that way to Eleven

Warnings: Homophobia, Getting outed (I didn't feel comfortable putting any slurs so don't worry about those if they make you uncomfortable as well)

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This was really Will's worse nightmare. Having so many eyes on him, some with amusement, some with shock, most with disgust was something out of a horror film.

He trudged down the hall of his home in California, hoping to find solace in his room after the day he's had. Jonathan tried to get him to speak on the ride home from school but got nothing more than mumbles and sniffles from the boy.

Will shed his shoulders of his backpack before falling on his bed face first, not caring that he was still wearing his clothes from the day, and smothering his face in his pillow as he finally let the sob rip through him.

There's no word or expression in the english language, maybe any language for that matter, that can begin to describe how terrible this day was.

How the laughs of his classmates reverberated around his head.

The look of humiliation on his face.

The red of his vision from anger.

God, he'd never been so angry.

Never felt so betrayed.

Or humiliated.

And a million other emotions he'd never be able to place.

But he couldn't show that. He'd already made enough of a fool of himself. Thinking he could trust anyone with a secret like that. Will didn't know how he would be able to show his face at that school again on Monday.

But for now, he laid on his bed, trying to muffle his agonizing sobs as best he could from his family.

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Eleven had sat quietly the entire car ride home, not fully understanding what had happened that day. She couldn't find Will at school for a majority of the day and when she saw him in the car, he looked half dead, like he was going to cry so hard his soul would leave his body. When he did speak, very rarely, his voice cracked like it was full of sand. Eleven had offered her water to Will to wash it down but he declined, saying he wasn't thirsty.

To say she was confused was an understatement. To say she was heartbroken for her brother was another. Eleven knew how to physically protect the people she loved, she did it when it was necessary while she had her powers, and she'd do it again in a heartbeat without them. But emotionally, she didn't know much about the world yet to truly understand the gravity of some situations.

She'd heard the whispers about Will, but didn't know what they meant. Most people moved away from her today and so she only caught bits and pieces.

"I can honestly see it."

"Do you see the way he acts?"

"I knew there was something wrong about that guy."

Wrong? Eleven could never look at either of her brothers as something wrong, no matter what. When she looked at Jonathan, she saw a caring older brother who worked hard to provide support for the people he loved. She saw him as the person who put a blanket over you when you fall asleep on the couch. Someone who will wrap you up and tell you everything will be okay eventually.

When she looked at Will, she saw nothing less than the most selfless person she'd ever meet. She saw him as the one light source in a dark hallway. She saw a person with a big heart threatening to burst at even the slightest prick because THAT'S just how much he loves people. Someone who would give the whole world to the people he loves no matter the cost. He loves with his whole being, never just a part.

And so it hurt her beyond anything to see him like this.

When they arrived home, she nearly sprinted to follow him up to his room but Jonathan wrapped his hand gently around the crook of her arm, shaking his head and letting out a sigh.

"Give him a second to calm down."

Eleven nodded before following Jonathan to the kitchen to do a bit of her homework and wait for Will to cool down a bit.

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When Will finally pried his face away from his pillow, he looked out the window to find the sun had already set before turning to his clock and groaning at the time he'd spent crying.

God, that's so pathetic, he told himself.

A quiet knock at his bedroom door caused him to quickly whip his head over to the other side of his bed. He sighed before getting up, wiping his eyes and looking in the mirror to see his disheveled hair which he quickly patted down, and moving to his door. He paused for a second, reaching for the door nob but never truly getting there.

"Will?" Eleven spoke softly. "Are you awake? Are you there?"

Will sighed, putting his forehead onto his door.

"Yeah," his voice cracked. "I'm... I'm here."

"Can you open the door, please? I have something for you."

Will smiled softly at his sister's earnest and hopeful voice before finally reaching for the door nob and turning it.

What he saw made him nearly burst into tears again, but for a good reason.

Eleven had 2 small plates with cupcakes on them in each hand, a soft smile on her face.

"Hi," she said, still using a soft voice.

"Hi."

"May I?" Eleven gestured with her cupcake platters into the room. Will moved slightly to let her in before shutting the door behind her.

Eleven handed one plate to Will, which he took with shaky hands, and set it down on his desk. Eleven frowned at this before placing her's down as well.

She moved towards Will with determination and before Will could protest or even realize what was truly happening, she was hugging him with her arms around his neck, on her tip toes due to their height difference.

It took him a second to reciprocate from shock but eventually his hands encircling her waist and his face finding a place in between her neck and shoulder.

He was sobbing again before he even realized he was crying. Eleven didn't say a word, just held him tighter as Will's arms squeezed her as well.

When his sobs soon diminished to hiccups, she still didn't let go.

"Will?"

She received a hum in response.

"Can you tell me what happened?"

He shakily sighed, took a breath, and began to speak. Messily at first, voice cracking from his scream sobs into his pillow earlier, but soon evening out.

"I had told him this secret a little bit ago. He... He seemed like the only person who I could trust with a secret like that. But... I was wrong. So, SO wrong. He told basically the whole school, right in front of me. No one stopped him, or told him to shut up. I... It was like I couldn't breathe. I couldn't speak. I just ran. To the bathroom."

"What was the secret?"

At this Will moved a bit away to look her in the eye. "You... You don't know?"

Eleven tilted her head almost like a curious dog. "No. No one told me. They just whispered and looked away."

"Oh god."

At this he moved back to their previous position and started to cry again.

"I didn't even think about you! I'm so sorry, El!"

"What? Will, no, it is okay! Why are you apologizing to me? They are the ones being... assholes."

Will chuckled through his small sobs at this. El barely swore, other than saying "bitchin'" which she learned last year, so the sentiment was nice.

"I know, I know, it's just... this secret. It's REALLY big for people that are... different. Like... me different. And it can affect their family and friends if other people know."

"Well, I'm different, too, Will."

"No, no I mean a... different kind of different."

"I don't think I understand wha-"

"I'm gay, El."

At this, more sobs ripped through Will as Eleven stood even more confused. She'd never heard of 'gay' and certainly not in the context of her brother. But for now, all she knew was that she needed to comfort him.

"Well, if you are gay, then it is not something bad, right? You can not be something bad, Will. Not to me. No matter what."

"You... You don't know what that means, do you?"

"Um... no?"

Will pulled away from the hug again and rubbed his eyes before grabbing a tissue and blowing his nose. He looked down at his hands, playing with his fingers before talking.

"It... it basically means when you like someone that's the same... gender as you."

"So... you are a boy that likes boys?"

Will looked to the side, took a deep breathe, hiccuped, and then looked Eleven in the eye.

"Yes, I do."

"Oh."

There was a pause before Eleven spoke again.

"So, if I liked girls, I would also be gay?"

"Yes, Eleven. Or you could call it being a lesbian if you only liked girls. There's different terms for different things."

"Oh."

Another pause, the only thing being heard being Will's sniffles and hiccups until he spoke again.

"Um... Why... Why do you ask?"

Eleven didn't respond, seeming to be deep in thought for a moment.

"And why do people see gay as bad?" She finally said.

"I guess some religions tell people it is. Some people see it as unnatural. Or dirty. I don't know, I'm not them so I don't really understand why."

Eleven hummed at that.

"Well, if my brother is gay, then it can't be all of those things," Eleven speaks, softly smiling at Will, who smiles back.

"Thank you, El."

El looked confused. "For what?"

"Being you."

"I do not know how to be anyone else," she laughs.

"Good."

Eleven looks down at her shuffling feet suddenly before starting to talk again.

"Will, how did you realize you were... gay?"

"Uh... well... I don't really know. I kind of just always knew I didn't like girls. But I really knew when I got a crush... on a boy... in middle school."

"Okay."

"Is there something you need help understanding, El?"

Hesitantly, El replies, "If... I were to have a crush on a girl... would that mean I am gay? Even if I did not know before?"

"Of course, El. Some people don't realize it until much later in life. Do you have a crush on a girl?"

El's cheeks light up like Rudolph's nose as she shrugged. "I dunno, maybe?"

Will chuckled, his hiccups having finally subsided. "Mind if I ask who?"

"Max..."

"Well then Eleven, I think that makes you a little bit gay." The siblings chuckled at this and Eleven picks her head up to look Will in the eye.

"But, I thought I really liked Mike when we were dating."

"You can like multiple genders. Or it could've been compulsary."

"Com-pul-sa-ry?"

"Sorry, it means like... you felt like you had to do it. Because it's what people tell you you should do."

"Oh... that makes sense now."

"You don't have to decide your label right now, or ever. But, from what I'm gathering, you like girls?"

Eleven inhaled deeply before responding, "Yeah. Yeah I think I do..."

"That's great, El."

The siblings smiled at each other before hugging once more. After pulling apart, they each reached for a cupcake, taking a bite, and talking for a bit longer.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Supportive Sister Eleven and Big Loving Brother Will my loves <3

Again, so sorry about how long this took but I tried to make it a bit longer with more dialogue :] Have a good day homie <3

[harrysbbby]

hello, I was wondering if I could have a request where the reader is like the pogues old best friend who moved away? but she moves back and they're all super excited bc she's like top tier Pogue? and her and Sarah Cameron get together? ty!!!

thanks for requesting anon! i’m going to make this into ~headcannons~

you were originally friends with John B and JJ

your notorious trio was known for wreaking havoc across the Cut

they were like your brothers

and then somewhere along the lines, you met Pope

your trio expanded and you had a great time, being friends in school and on weekends you'd go surfing

you’d always found you’d gotten along better with boys

girls made you feel different (but of course at 13 years old you weren't sure why)

during the July of eighth grade your life was turned upside down

one of your parents had been giving an amazing opportunity across country in California: better pay, getting paid to move- it was exactly what your family needed for a better life.

but it meant leaving your friends.

on your final weekend you and your boys were inseparable, and then you moved

you were gone about 5 years, only returning just after senior year and graduation.

your family, probably now considered “Kooks”, decided to summer in the Outerbanks before you went off to college and you got to see all your friends again

you had stayed in touch but it wasn’t the same as seeing them in person

when you ran into the Chateau, it felt magical. John B was first to grab you in a hug, JJ childishly running after the two of you, and dog piling you into the grass. You were hysterically laughing underneath them as Pope climb aboard as well

when you stood, wiping the grass off you, you noticed two girls 

Kiara was a glorified Kook-Pogue mutt, having toed the line for years. you hadn't had much to do with her other than seeing her at The Wreck. You figured she would fit in well with the boys

Sarah’s presence, however, surprised you. She was snobbish and a bit of a prude and couldn’t help the confusion write across your features when you saw her

John B explained how Kiara had been inducted into your group a few years after you’d left and Sarah and Kiara had made up not one after.

“you could never be replaced though!” JJ pouted, wrapping his arms around you before coming to a halt and gasping, “you know what this calls for?”

“KEGGER!”

So that night you were in the boneyard catching up with all your old friends

you slipped away for a moment, needing to catch your breath. next thing you knew Sarah Cameron was standing next to you

“Why do you hate me?” “What! I don’t hate you,” you laughed awkwardly. She looked at you knowingly

You explained that you were cautious of the fact that she was a fully fledged Kook

“Aren’t you now, as well,” she retorted sassily

you couldn't help the smile that spread across your face

over the next few weeks you hung out with the Agues and it was if no time had past

you got to know Sarah better too. her house was closest to the one you were staying in on Figure 8, so you would meet up before hanging out with the group

she told you about her family struggles and you told her how you were terrified you’d chosen the wrong college- through your struggles you formed a bond. but you worried that it was one sided...

one night Sarah came bursting into your room

“Hey, what’s up?” “John B asked me out,” “Oh, uh, that’s great?”

you felt the pang in your chest, the poignancy of it all hitting you- you were green with envy. 

“I’m not too sure,” she replied flopping down next to you on your bed, looking up at the ceiling, “I turned him down.”

you asked her why, and she explained she wants something different, but doesn’t quite know what it is. “Is that crazy?”

“No. That’s probably one of the most real things someone has ever said to me.”

you had turned to face one another, your faces just inches apart

the tension hung thick in the air

“I’ve been chasing something different too,” you said, eyes flicking down to her lips. she nodded slight, her pink lips pouting as you placed your lips over hers

you kissed her like she wanted to be kissed, filling the void of uncertainty 

you kissed her like no boy had ever kissed her, although hesitant, it was soft and moist and solidified your feelings of reality

and you felt that same feeling you felt when you were 13, when JJ had kissed you during a game of truth or dare and you felt nothing but then a girl who was pretty smiled at you during gym class- different

she made you feel unconventional, yet true. And you worried that going off to college would change things, but she stuck by your side. 

You realised you didn't mind Kooks, you liked girls, and you loved Sarah Cameron.

if you liked this please like & reblog! im trying to reach my next milestone so I can host a games celebration night! all the support helps love you all!

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[thisstableground]

Anything with Ruben' s sisters spending time with their brother even though they have nothing in common with him, but especially after Jamaica, they'll sit through the most boring rose clipping demonstration with gusto bc they're so happy to have him back

ohhh my heart! yes, definitely. they’ve always got on well as siblings, but also as siblings (especially with them being so much younger than him) the girls have very often gently - or occasionally not-so-gently - teased him about being a big nerd. they love him, but he’s a dork and he’s their brother and sometimes he’s really boring, sometimes he’s really annoying and a total know-it-all, so sometimes they make fun of him for it. that’s just family life.

but then he disappears, then he’s dead, and for two months there are all these conspicuous absences. the girls trying to go about their days without obsessing about where their brother could be, about where he’ll never be again, and it’s impossible not to think about him all the time.

mercedes has the radio on while doing dishes, just trying to drown out her own constantly repeating thoughts that ruben’s dead, he was hurt, he was alone, but the voices on the radio will suddenly strike up a little info piece about how spring is here, it’s the perfect time for gardening, everything’s all growing and flowering and he’s dead, mom moved all his plants here, he can’t look after them any more.

paola has to leave in the middle of science class and hide out in the nurse’s office because she bursts into hysterical tears looking at the periodic table poster on the wall, remembering the periodic table mug she got ruben for christmas when she was nine and how much he loved it, how he’d always use that one for his drink whenever he came back to mom’s for a visit and the last time he came back for a visit he didn’t even stay long enough to use it for his after-dinner coffee, because they were all encouraging him to go out on the town with the man who would eventually kill him.

and then the impossible happens and ruben comes home. things are supposed to be okay again and nothing is okay again. ruben barely talks about anything, barely looks at them, seems like he never really came back at all.

mercedes tries to take his hand and show him that look, we kept all of your plants, they’re all still alive, everyone’s still alive. ruben snatches his hand away from her, doesn’t even glance at the plants, says, “you should’ve just thrown them all out.”

paola sits in the living room with her school stuff, already fully aware she’s probably going to have to retake all her exams next year but she says “ruben, can you help me with my chemistry homework? i don’t really understand it.” he picks up the worksheet of questions, her genius brother who could have done this level of work in middle school, and looks at it like he’s reading hieroglyphics. eventually, quietly, he says, “neither do i.”

their mom says not to pressure him, not to rush him. their mom says that underneath it all he’s still the brother they remember, of course he is. they look at him, sitting on the couch wrapped in a quilt like it’s a shock blanket, staring blankly at the wall for hours on end, and they still love him, but they don’t recognise him any more.

so yeah, absolutely, when those familiar little ways he’d start one of his nerd-ass long-winded sentences start coming back through - “well, actually—” “did you know—“ “you know what’s fascinating?” they don’t tease him. not just because they’re still trying to work out the boundaries for teasing again, trying not to do or say any of the million things that make him crumple back in on himself and hide away in his room, but because both of them have now been given this terrible, weighty knowledge that it isn’t a guarantee that ruben will be there forever, that the odds of him coming back and of recovering were so, so miniscule. they might have never heard him give a lengthy monologue about soil alkalinity that nobody asked to hear again, and the way his eyes light up like a kid going to disneyland when he does. they might have never seen the funny way he waves his hands around like he’s trying to take off when he gets excited about some concept that’s way too deep for any of them to have even heard of again. they want to make the most of this miracle, for sure. 

he’s never the same brother they remember from before, he’s been changed too much to ever go back completely, but he’s still patient and clever and impossibly fucking nerdy, still their big brother who they love so very much. they just like seeing him happy. (even though he is sometimes so incredibly boring.)