#and she played at rep secret sessions to get people to stop crying

[iwatcheditbegin]

Not to age myself but it’s so wild that there was times when Taylor playing just the 5 min atw was something that made the fandom react the way we do when she plays insane mashups. And now we’ve had 2 years of this song , the version we begged for, on the setlist. This song literally raised me

[secret-engima]

nammuellyll

@secret-engima congrats, you woke the monster. ardyn in my hero academia. there. go wild.

Me: MWAHAHAHAHA. You say that like I regret it >:DDD

-Ardyn in this wakes up post The Great Stabbing and is ... more than a little annoyed. Hello. He wanted the afterlife experience. HELLO WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS DESTINY OF FADING TO COSMIC DUST.

-But no. Apparently he gets to have a “second chance” to “be a hero”.

-Just let one of the Astrals show themselves, he’ll show where to put that “second chance”-.

-Anyway. Ardyn is Ardyn, he looks like he did in canon but he’s sane again. Oddly enough he’s still got both his armiger magic, his super healing, and some of his scourge-like abilities (scary face included). He’s not corrupted tho. Ardyn isn’t sure what to make of that.

-Goes and hobos around for a while, getting used to this world and the fact that everyone looks like a storybook encounter with cursed items gone wrong. Picks up a Smol Traumatized Child that can disintegrate things with his fingers off the streets because Why Not, Let’s Both Be Homeless Together Kiddo, then in short order gets himself known as a Major Villain when he finds a trafficking ring and, since Ardyn is Not Exactly Moral Even If Arguably Sane, he slaughters them to the last man.

-Ardyn is known on the news via grainy footage that only catches glimpses of his scourge face and a lot of rumor, he laughs his head off when the ONE soundbite they manage to get from the scene leads to his being named Adagium. AGAIN. Okay he walked into that one.

-Uses the resources of the no-longer-operational trafficking ring to set up a nice restaurant bar with a secret (illegal) clinic in the back. He makes dishes exclusively from his original time period and so the food is known as very eccentric but good. Ardyn rapidly gets the wackiest duel rep in history. To the mainstream/police/pro heroes he’s a shadowy super-murderer named Adagium. To the underworld and the homeless, the quirkless and the children, Adagium is a name that means hope and shelter, healing and comfort and a monster that protects its own rather than giving meaningless promises, all in exchange for simple favors like clothes and information and school books for his child.

-Ardyn makes special one-finger gloves for Tenko so that he can touch touch stuff without worrying about destroying it. He also, at some point, picks up the rest of the not-LoV by pure happenstance. Toga comes into his clinic hunting a patient, he scolds her, puts her in time-out, then gives her a lolli with heavy iron supplement because clearly if the girl has a blood craving she needs more iron in her system. Don’t you heathens know anything about the meaning behind cravings. Spinner gets into a fight in Ardyn’s territory, Ardyn patches him up and gently informs him that if he’s going to pick fights, at least fight dirty enough to win them. Twice comes there often for a meal and company that won’t look at him funny for talking to himself, Mr. Compress is bound and determined to get Ardyn to be surprised by one of his magic tricks (never works, because unlike Compress Ardyn can do LITERAL MAGIC). Magne is not a regular, but still shows up once in a blue moon because Ardyn’s illegal clinic is probably better stocked than most legal ones at this point (people tend to trade his treatment for actual medicine and equipment, Ardyn never asks where they get it).

-Dabi is the last to be picked up. He is also how Ardyn’s increasing collection of strays first learn about Ardyn’s superhealing factor when he TAKES Dabi’s fresh, weeping burns onto himself and they heal over in minutes, leaving both of them unscarred (or mostly so, Ardyn’s skin will always have faint ripple marks where the burns were). It is also around this time that, coincidentally, people start gunning for Endeavor and trying to make his life miserable. Because Adagium hates him and is plotting to end him, so clearly that’s their cue, right?

-The rest of Endeavor’s kids vanish in the middle of the night. No one in the police or pro heroes can find them.

-Far away in a little, unnoticed restaurant bar, Dabi holds his siblings tight and promises they are never going to have to suffer That Man again. Ardyn rests gentle hands on Shōto’s face and whispers that everything will be okay even as his skin bubbles and boils into an ugly burn before healing over with the faintest scars.

-Moving on from Ardyn’s growing collection of strays (that will keep growing so keep an eye on that):

-Ardyn doesn’t get the whole quirk thing. Or the whole superhero society thing. If something needs doing and it suits him then he shall do it, none of this Symbol of Peace nonsense.

-Yes, he said nonsense. The Symbol of Peace is nonsense and only setting society up to fall apart when this All Might fellow either gets too powerful and is made to take a fall or when he finally picks a fight he can’t win.

-Ardyn says as much to Toshinori Yagi, the nice civilian man who wandered into Ardyn’s bar without knowing who is running it. The man sputters a bit and asks why he thinks so, Ardyn just laughs and laughs and laughs until there is something unnerving about the sound and Ardyn has to stop and catch his breath. Blue eyes flicker gold as Ardyn murmurs that he’s seen it happen before.

-Somehow, Toshinori thinks this strange, eccentric barkeep doesn’t mean as a bystander.

-Ardyn meets Aizawa while Aizawa is on the hunt for Adagium, they eyeball each other like wary cats before Ardyn decides that this angry hobo hero is His Now and invites the man over for food. Aizawa declines. Ardyn casually slings Aizawa over his shoulder and carts him in anyway before Aizawa can think to retaliate.

-Ardyn is highly amused to learn that Hobo Man is after the Adagium. Good luck with that, truly, best of fortune.

-So, for those of you paying attention, Ardyn’s count of Heroes He Has Adopted is officially up to 2, even if he pretends not to notice the first one (pretends. Because he knows exactly who Toshi is, come ON it’s not that hard, they have the same voice and smile and everything).

-Ardyn’s kids grow up with his scathing political commentary and one foot in both legal and illegal worlds. Some of them (Tenko, Dabi, Toga, Spinner) decide that they’re gonna make a League to show the world how dumb its being. A League of Villains! (”League of Vigilante’s sounds more appropriate for your chosen activities, Tenko Mine-” “VILLAINS. WE ARE VILLAINS NOW.” “Alright then, will all villains in the room please wash up for supper?”)

-Ardyn finds Hitoshi and decides he’s not quite qualified for this one.

-Aizawa wakes up from another rare session of being black-out to find Ardyn cheerfully tearing up his apartment to make it more “child suitable”. Child WHAT. Child suitable. For your child.

-MY WHAT.

-Ardyn calmly holds out the adoption papers that have Aizawa’s signature on all of them, perfectly legible because the man is a little too good at pretending he isn’t stone drunk, and then gestures to the sad-eyed, skeptical boy with purple hair in the corner. Ardyn smiles (reads: threatens with killing intent) and says that he’s sure Aizawa will take his new responsibilities seriously (read: you’d better or you’re next on my hitlist).

-Aizawa, never one to go back on his word, has a kid now I guess.

-Shōto comes home one day with a bby Izuku in tow and Ardyn is charmed beyond all words over the boy. He’s so Smol! And Smart! Lookit his little brain firing away! Upon hearing the boy is developing All The Esteem Issues because of his bullying and quirklessness, Ardyn stares off into space for a long time, acknowledges that he’s a sap, and then soothingly tells Izuku that some quirks just come in late, why, Ardyn’s came in late too! Just give it a few days. Then he pats Izuku on the head and uses the motion to disguise the teeny tiny fragment of magic he splits off from his own and gives to this boy who deserves better.

-Izuku comes back two days later, crying for joy and with sparkling green magic dripping from his fingertips. Ardyn exclaims in “surprise” over the similarity of their quirks and offers to teach him. Izuku accepts and after some sweet-talking to Inko, Ardyn gets to mold this tiny genius boi as he pleases to both be proud of himself and his “quirk” AND to fight quirkless as much as possible because “tactics, my boy, take them by surprise!”

-Also then he figures out that he didn’t just lend Izuku magic because this world is funky like that, he genuinely gave it away which counts as LC adoption rituals so OOPS GUESS WHO HAS A BLOOD SON NOW.

-Oh well.

-Toshi and Izuku get along like a house on fire whenever Toshi comes over for a hot meal and Ardyn is pretty content with his brood and his handiwork against Endeavor (who by this point has been exposed as an abuser and put in jail for a long time HAH). Toshi ... pointedly doesn’t ask why several of his kids look like Endeavor. Nope. Not asking. They get their red hair from Ardyn, clearly.

-Of course, all of this casual wrecking of canon attracts the attention of AfO, who is not happy about the competition. He shows up at one point, all suave and intimidating because he is immortal and older than anyone alive and smarter too and-

-Ardyn laughs in his face.

-Baby.

-Bby playing at immortal.

-You think two centuries or so makes you hot stuff? You think stolen quirks makes you special? You think you can come into Ardyn’s territory and threaten his kids and get away with it because you’re ... a little older than the average human being? Ardyn leans close and smiles as AfO tries and fails to steal a quirk that doesn’t exist to be stolen, his Scourge face leaking into existence as he purrs that AfO should’ve minded his own business a little more than he minded others.

-AfO came prepared for a quirk. He did not come prepared for the combined might of 2k year old LC magic and abilities of a Scourge the world has never, and will never, see.

-It’s not even a fight.

-Adagium makes the news again when a body is found hanging from a high tower, torn apart as if by dozens upon dozens of blades, the corpse pinned in place by a spear that dissolves into red sparks upon the police touching it, leaving behind only a note that gets leaked to the media and goes viral.

-Dear World, refrain from touching my stuff, and you won’t end up like this man. Sincerely, Adagium.

-Not the most menacing letter until you considering the delivery method.

-Toshinori has to sit there and have a Moment upon the news that the man who murdered Nana is already dead by someone else’s hand and they have no idea when the fight went down. Because surely there was a fight, right? AfO had been centuries old and with dozens upon dozens of quirks. Who could possibly have brought him down when Nana, the then-wielder of OfA could not???

-Ardyn gently pats Toshi’s shoulder through the breakdown. There there. I’m sure you’ll figure out the culprit eventually, you’re a smart man Toshi. There there.

-Also Kurogiri shows up not long after that entire debacle looking for a new job because his old one got murdered and Adagium seems like an efficient dude. Ardyn is always happy for more hands on deck in wrangling the kids, and this one has warping powers. Welcome aboard Kurogiri.

[all-at-once-you-are-the-one]

Stream of Consciousness Lover Album Reaction

I wrote out my first thoughts while listening to the album and put them in one big post. I hope you find them as funny as I do lmao

1. I Forget That You Existed

LOL so that’s what the drake Easter egg was about!

Who is this about????

NIIIIiiiiiiiiiIIIiiiiCE

SHE SOUNDS SO GOOD

I JUST FORGOT WHAT THEY WERE LMAOOO

HER LAUGH!! SO CUTE!!

This track is somehow savage and adorable at the same time

So......yeah.......

ShnfhKJHGKSHDKGHSKGHSJG

2. Cruel Summer

This is giving me Katy perry vibes

The devils roll their dice line is from this?? Didn’t expect that

This is maybe the catchiest song I’ve ever heard

Why is this not a single??????

STILL DONT KNOW WHAT SUMMERS A KNIFE MEANS

EXPLAIN TAYLOR

This also kind of gives me Jonas brothers vibes, why???

Again.....what is this about???

OooOOoooOooWhoooooAAAAhh i loveeee this

OOOH no you know what this gives me GETAWAY CAR vibes

Wait...do we think that at the beginning joe wanted to keep their relationship private and Taylor agreed but then changed her mind? WAIT NO.....is this about her having to keep her love for joe secret at first the summer they met because she was with someone else/it was too soon??

3. Lover

Ok SUPER WEIRD transition into lover but OK

As much as I love albums with a clear narrative like rep I also like being all over the place so this is fine

CAN I GO WHERE YOU GOOOOOO

FOR EVER AND EVER ANDIIIII

YOURE MY MY MY MYYYYY LOVER

I wonder what inspired her to use the term lover? Does she not know that normal people don’t speak like that?

WAIT IS THE REASON LOVER COMES AFTER CRUEL SUMMER because of the 3 summers line?? Like look how we started...now were here

Does the album begin with i forgot you existed because its like ok this Kanye situation happened...but now were gonna forget about that and talk about the realer real story of the past couple years of my life rather than seeing it through the lens of that story like on rep

4. The Man

THE ACCURACY

THE ACCURAACCCCYYYYYYYYY

IT HUUURRTTSSS

Honestly though i actually thought this one would be more savage, i thi

DID SHE JUST SAY BITCHES AND MODELSSSS?????

SLJGSHUKGHKDG

Never mind this is as savage as i wanted

I should know better than to judge a Taylor song before the bridge

Again why isn’t this a single.....it better be

5. The Archer

The emotional whiplash this album is giving me is insane.

It’s like RED but with synths

Is the archer placed here because part of her lack of self confidence comes from the things the media says about her (because she’s a woman not a man?) INTERESTING THOUGHT

Don’t have much else to say about this, we already know

.....

Wow the cake i bought for tonight is somehow way too sweet

6. I Think He Knows

Definitely didn’t think i think he knows was about being horny af

But this is so catchy

Why is everything so catchy?? Literally every song should be a single

BOY I UNDERSTAND the confidence!! After the archer!! I love that he makes her feel that way1!!

I THINK HE KNOOOOOOOWWWWSS

This gives me teenage dream vibes and i fucking love that song

7. Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince

Ok time for the one with the weird title

I love how she keeps comparing her current feelings to how she felt as a teenager!! How its the same and different....very good.

SHES A BAD BAD GIRL

More dice!

Is she imagining what it would be like if she was in this relationship in high school? Because I DO THAT ALL THE TIIIIME GIRL SAME

THATS MY WHOLE WORLD SOOOO CUUUUTE

YOU PLAY STUPID GAMES YOU WIN STUPID PRIZES

VOTED

MOST

LIKELY

TO

RUN

AWAY

WITH

YOU

I really like this one. I didn’t expect I would.

This should be a single.

8. Paper Rings

THE VOICE EFFECT

She’s singing so fast on these songs!!!! I CANT KEEP UPP

UH HUH

THATS RIGHT

This is so retro and i loooooooooooooooooooooove it

DIRTY DREAMS??????? TAYLOR PLEASE

OMG THE COLOUR WE PAINTED YOUR BROTHERS WALL

THE PICTURE

THE PICTURE

FROM THE REP MAGAZINES

SDIHGUSHGUKHDZRKUGHKUDZHGUHDZGHDKZHGYIDZJLGJLDJGJSDJGDHZGHLGHLSHGHDG

II LIKE SHINY THINGS

THIS SONG IS SO FUN! ALL THESE SONGS ARE SO FUN!!

Ok baby boy that’s kinda weird but you know what..

....

....

Ok its still weird but maybe it will grow on me

This should be a single.

9. Cornelia Street

HERE IT IS!!! THE FIRST TAYLOR PRODUCED SONG

I NEVER WANT CORNELIA STREET AGAIN?? WHAT IS THIS ABOUT?? THEIR WORST FIGHT? ANOTHER RELATIONSIP? QUESTIONS

The storytelling!

Wait......is this about before they ran away together in CIWYW?? Like she thought he didn’t really want her so she was gonna run away alone...but then he was like no i really do lets go

I totally thought that this was the one with the staring out the window like I’m not your favorite town line was from

She ended it with the line she started with (i think)? Ike she used to!

Kinda feel like people hyped this one up too much but i do like it

10. Death by a Thousand Cuts

The piano!!!!

Like a thousand notes a thousand cuts

Look through the windows of this love - like the heart on her eye! I get it I GET IT lmaoooo

If this song was on red it would have the saddest production but on this album its a bop

11. London Boy

IS THAT JOE??? OMG lmao

HER ACCENT LMAOOOOOOOOO

I don’t know if this song is supposed to be as hilarious as i think it is but i really do think its hilarious

What does like a Tennessee Stella McCartney even mean????

I kinda feel like this song is too specific to her life to be relatable so maybe that’s why i feel that way about it?

12. Soon You’ll Get Better

Ok great... so we went from that to the sad one

I have to prepare

I didn’t tell you i was scared....

Cause you have to...

The fact that this is the country song...

I cant

GOD NOW IM CRYING THIS IS SO SAD

That was the only song so far i had to actually stop typing for. God....I’m so sad for her and her family.

13. False God

I can barely take this song in because of what just came before.

But i really like it. And i really like the theme of religion on this album

14. You Need to Calm Down

NOW YNTCD IS PLAYING

??? IM LITERALLY SOO SAD FROM SOON YOULL GET BETTER STILL

I CANT

PROCESS

THIS

This album is literally all over the place, i keep trying to assign a narrative to it and its not working out so I’m just gonna give up

Sometimes albums are just collections of songs and not a coherent, linear story and that is ok! Even if its not what i prefer

It certainly didn’t bother me on her first few albums.

The one thing i take away from this is like...no wonder she’s so determined to be so overly positive, i think for her its that or break down crying in the face of what’s happening in her family

15. Afterglow

I really love this song!!! Hashtag relatable

......

Man..you can really tell even just from my typing that my heart isn’t in this anymore after that song

Like

Fuck

I think I’m just sad for me too, because i know that i will go through that too sooner rather than later and I already have friends dealing with losing a parent.

16. ME!

My only thought on this is god bless brendon Urie for injecting so much additional joy and energy into this song and making Taylor happy, i just get the vibe that she really needed that

ALSO WHAT THERES REALLY NO HEY KIDS SPELLING IS FUN

TAYLOR EXPLAAIAIIIIIIIAIAIIAN

We’ll see if its on my physical cd copies when they arrive...if not then maybe it was always planned to be a line only in the single version

17. It’s Nice to Have a Friend

Ok I don’t really like this song that much but i really like the messages she’s trying to send like...real love feels like hanging out with a childhood bestie, so comfortable

18. Daylight

I WAS LIKE MEH

BUT THE FUCKING BRIDGE

THE BRIDGE

IM EMOTIONALLY DESTROYED

Also something about the chorus reminds me of the chorus of starlight

STEP INTO THE DAYLIGHT AND LET IT GO

YES

I WAS LIKE NO IS THAT NOT A LYRIC??

BUT IT ISTHANK GOD

THE END

YOU ARE WHAT YOU LOVE

THAT WAS LIKE

MY MANTRA FOR A COUPLE YEARS A WHILE BACK

BECAUSE

I LOVED SO MANY PEOPLE BUT THEY DIDNT LOVE ME

AND I WANTED TO BE DEFINITED BY THE FACT THAT I LOVED THEM NOT THAT HTEY DIDNT LOVE ME

IIIIIIIIIIII

I

IN CONCLUSION:

My feelings are everywhere. Some songs disappointed me but some blew me away - soon you’ll get better is basically the new Never Grow Up for me which is saying a lot. Everything is catchy a hell though even the songs I didn’t like as much. Ultimately i would have liked more songs about varying subject matter esp. self love but as it is, it is still somehow so all over the place. It really just shows how many emotions and phases can be contained within one relationship (i mean I’m assuming every song about a relationship is about joe). I really think that the song about her mom maybe should have been placed somewhere else...I don’t know where I would have put it but that shit is HEAVY. I am so honored that she and her family would share that with us though. I have a million question about how Andrea is doing and if my theory on why tour hasn’t been announced is correct...maybe she will explain more in the interviews/secret session audio we’re getting in the next couple days. I think my favorite song is Lover but that may change. I don’t think any song on here tops my current all time favorite Taylor song though which is CIWYW. That’s a little disappointing but not every song or album has to be my fave! And this album will probably grow on me esp as i hear Taylor’s explanations of it. Rep did. I really did nooott feel good about most of rep at first, it took a few days.

[morningsound15]

How do you think Beca would handle her fame in perdition? We know all the gossip magazines like to make up stuff about celebrity couples and that talk show hosts and interviewers like to prod, do you reckon Beca would be open about her relationship with Chloe bc that’s something she’s wanted for so long, and therefore would scream from the rooftops that she’s in love with Chloe Beale and that she’s hers?

i know this wasn’t your intention anon but congratulations you got a drabble i just wrote in like 3 hours:

(P.S. If you love Stevie as much as I do, PLEASE watch this video of her singing “Wild Heart” while getting her makeup done for a Rolling Stone photo session. It will change your life.)

[COVER STORY]: Beca Mitchell on Her Newest Album, Coming Out & Finding Love. “I’m bisexual, and I’m proud of it.”By Sydney Havershaw

**

You probably wouldn’t recognize Beca Mitchell if she walked past you on the street. Her personal style is more ‘early-20’s grunge rock enthusiast’ than ‘Grammy Award-winning musician.’ She’s dressed comfortably for our interview — in a pair of skinny jeans, combat boots, and an oversized flannel shirt. Mitchell seems perpetually youthful, and among the crowd of college students around us, she fits right in. At 5’2”, she is also certainly an unassuming figure on the street. “I’m basically a hobbit,” she jokes early in our interview, when situation demands we perch on a set of barstools while we wait for our lunch table. Mitchell’s feet dang comically off the floor, and she swings them absent-mindedly while we get to know each other.

The restaurant where we meet is a tiny hole-in-the-wall Italian bistro — the space is so small it can barely fit 6 tables and the mini-bar it confusingly insists on forcing into the already-crowded room — but it’s a favorite of Mitchell’s (who made me adamantly swear to reveal neither the name nor location of her personal haunt). The little building is charming and rustic and somehow both out-of-place and perfectly nestled within its surroundings. The atmosphere is exquisite. I find myself nearly anxious to grab my pen and begin scribbling down notes.

There’s something easy about being around Mitchell. She has this awkward energy that makes her seem jumpy but also strangely endearing. She’s quick to crack jokes and put herself down for the benefit of the group dynamic. Though her proclivity to make fun of herself is startling at first, her wit and sincerity ultimately triumph, becoming the adjectives which immediately come to mind whenever her name is mentioned in my presence thereafter. Before we even order our food she’s had me in stitches twice, both times with stories about some of her more raucous adventures with her all-female college acapella group, The Barden Bellas (more on them later). She’s an excellent storyteller, if not excellently verbose, and I cannot wait to see what she might have in store for our interview.

It’s a bright afternoon in early March, with clear skies and only the barest hint of a chill in the air. It’s beautiful, and the subtle feeling of spring is beginning to emerge in outfit choices, store inventory, and menu changes. But while most people tend to feel energized and rejuvenated with the promise of new beginnings, Mitchell is still practically reeling from the relative whirlwind of the previous month. She won a Grammy, came out, and started a new relationship — and that was all just in one day!

“I feel like everything changed overnight. I went from being, like, a club DJ to now, I’m at the point where people literally stop me on the street for pictures.” She laughs and shakes her head, like she can’t quite believe it. “It’s been completely nuts.”

For those who may be unaware: after a very public Grammys acceptance speech earlier this year, Mitchell was caught locking-lips with her date, Chloe. [Note: While their relationship is not a secret, and the identity of Mitchell’s partner can be easily found, Mitchell requested we leave Chloe’s last name out of this article for the sake of her privacy.]

Almost immediately, Mitchell’s name-recognition sky-rocketed. The image of the kiss circulated countless gossip websites, made headlines in newspapers around the country, and became a trending topic on Twitter. Videos of the night played on nearly every morning talk show. Mitchell’s social media following almost tripled overnight. Suddenly, and without warning, Mitchell has found herself at the center of a media blitz caused by her very public — and incredibly adorable (link) — public coming out. Seriously, if you haven’t seen the video of her acceptance speech yet (have you been living under a rock?) go watch it right now. You’ll cry, you’ll laugh, you’ll squeal, you’ll fall in love.

**

[image]

Pictured: Beca Mitchell [left] and partner kissing on the red carpet.

**

Since we both know where this interview is eventually headed (it would be impossible not to talk about it at some point), I figure I should ask: does she want to talk about her relationship first?

She shrugs, her leg bouncing under the table. “I don’t know. No? The… I always think of myself as an artist, first. And my personal life is my personal life. But, you guys are, like… the gay magazine. I can’t imagine it won’t come up.”

Her confidence from earlier has all-but vanished. Perhaps because her music carries with it the easy, confident maturity of an artist with twice her experience, it’s easy to forget she’s still new at this. In order to put her at ease, I start off with a few softball questions, things to get her excited and make her more comfortable with where our interview is going.

Her favorite musician growing up? She smiles, looking much less anxious. “I think this probably is gonna hurt my rep, but I gotta go with Stevie.”

“Nicks?” I ask. This is surprising to me, though perhaps it shouldn’t be. While Mitchell’s music is pretty reliably ‘Pop’, it also shows evidence of clear influence from eclectic styles of music, including jazz and alternative.

“Absolutely. She was my childhood crush. And like, she’s totally everything that I want to be, as a musician. First time I listened to the album Rumours I thought, ‘God, that’s just about the most tragic thing I’ve ever heard.’ It’s the story of a relationship falling apart, the dissolution of a marriage, about cheating and heartbreak and mistrust. But it’s also about optimism, and joy. And… well, to me, it’s also about love. And I used to sit there and listen to that album and think, ‘That’s what I want. If I can produce a piece of music even half as emotional, half as complete, I’ll be happy.’ My entire life, all I’ve ever wanted is just one great love story to tell.”

She’s passionate when talking about her music. She seems energized and excited, like she’s thrilled that anyone at all is interested in her music in any capacity. Because it seems like her preferred topic of discussion, I keep asking her questions about her most recent work. Her favorite song on the album? “Oh, that one’s easy,” she says. “Gotta be ‘Saudade’.”

Saudade is a Portuguese word that roughly translates to a feeling of longing, melancholy, or nostalgia. It is a word closely associated with Brazilian music and Brazilian culture. Its most famous usage in pop culture comes from the famous Antônio Carlos Jobim Bossa Nova song “Chega de Saudade” (the published English version is titled “No More Blues”). Mitchell uses the chord changes of Jobim’s chart as the basis for her own melody. This is a common musical practice amongst jazz composers (similar to what ’sampling’ is to Hip Hop and R&B artists), but much less prevalent in Mitchell’s more Pop-dominated genre.

“Saudade” is an early stand-out on Mitchell’s album. It’s a melancholy affair, with a Latin/Bossa drum feel that immediately conjures images of warm summer nights. And to round out the nostalgia of the instrumentals, the song’s lyrics are almost as haunting as the vocal work. Cynthia-Rose Adams, one of the album’s main featured artists, manages to evoke a quiet, unendurable kind of heartbreak while still keeping her performance subtle and subdued. The piece is more than a little impressive. It truly is a masterclass in sad, mournful, longing ballads, and puts more popular efforts by artists like Adele completely to shame. If it isn’t on every teenage girl’s “breakup playlist” by the end of the year, I would be shocked.

But when asked about her preference for that song, Mitchell’s response is less-confident than the quickness of her earlier answer would imply. “I work with a lot of really incredible musicians. My friend, Cynthia-Rose [Adams], who actually provides vocals for that track, she’s a trained jazz vocalist. She’s listed as a co-writer for that song because it’s really all because of her that it has any kind of melody. I showed her a bunch of lyrics really early on, back when I was still work-shopping, and she was in the room with me when I was writing the first draft. But, God, it was terrible.” She laughs again (always willing to joke at her own expense). “No, for real, it was… horrible. So cliché and dumb. But Cynthia just kind of on a whim suggested we try to craft a love ballad using the chord changes of Chega, and I listened to it one time and then it’s like I couldn’t stop writing. It all just poured out of me. The music tied to the lyrics and back again. It’s like the song always existed, and I just was the first person to hear it and write it down.” She pauses, as if she’s only just realizing how long she’s been speaking. “But really,” she says quickly, “without the performance Cynthia puts out on that track, it just… I couldn’t have done it with any other singer. I’m so grateful for her.”

This is a common feature of our interview. Mitchell is almost reluctant to take sole credit for her own music. At every turn she’s thanking her vocalists, her sound engineers, and her co-producers. It belies the incredible amount of time and energy and dedication she put into crafting this album. Anyone who works with Mitchell will also be sure to note both her work ethic and her unyielding attention to detail. Talking to her, you might think a great many things about her character, but ‘immodest’ would certainly not be one of them.

When I ask how she met her collaborators — specifically Adams and Emily Junk, the album’s other featured vocalist — Mitchell grins wider than she has all afternoon. The ease immediately returns to her body. She relaxes in her chair, lounging back with her legs crossed over the knee. She seems like any other 20-something again. You never would guess that, a few short weeks ago, she was a trending topic on Twitter.

“I met Cynthia and Emily in college. They were in the same acapella group I was in.” She’s talking about the Barden Bellas, the nationally-ranked all-female acapella group out of Barden University, a small liberal arts college just outside Atlanta, Georgia. Mitchell was the captain of the group for 3 years, and led the Bellas to two national championships and one world title. “We were really just a bunch of misfits,” she says when I prod her for more information. “And, y’know, being a group of only women, it’s actually pretty hard to make a name for yourself in the acapella world. The best groups are either mixed or all-male. And we’re a very diverse group, and most of us don’t necessarily fit with conventional beauty standards. So I’m just really proud we were able to break through, make an impact, and show people what a group of badass, powerful ladies can do.”

Does she keep in contact with her old group? “Oh, of course, we talk on the daily. I mean, the Bellas gave me everything. They’re my family. I truly don’t know where I’d be without them.”

But now, it’s time to address the elephant in the room. I almost want to apologize to her, though I know it’s completely unnecessary. She has made it apparent that she is comfortable answering personal questions, and has previously specified to me that she is open and completely willing to talk about her own coming out experience. But even though I know she’s agreed to this line of questioning, that’s still just the kind of person she is: she makes you want to look out for her, to keep her safe. She’s so shockingly sincere, so non-malicious, that to do anything to harm her in any way seems tantamount to blasphemy.

Almost like she can sense a shift in the air between us, Mitchell sets her shoulders. I ask her if she’s nervous about coming out. “Not at all,” she answers quickly. “I’ve been ‘out’ for pretty much my whole life. Sexuality has never been a problem for me. I’ve never talked about it before because, honestly — and I know this sounds cheesy and cliché, but I really do mean it — it’s just never come up. It’s been such a non-issue for so long. And I guess I figured it would become common knowledge sooner or later. I just never anticipated, the, um…”

“Going viral?”

She flushes. “Yeah. Never saw that one coming.”

Becoming an overnight sensation by going public with a relationship is an experience that is difficult to replicate or understand, if you haven’t been through it. I ask Beca how she feels about the sudden influx and attention she’s been receiving.

“I don’t mind the attention,” she says honestly. “It can get pretty scary sometimes, but it’s not like I have paparazzi lurking around my apartment or anything, so I feel like I got off pretty easy. I mean I don’t like the attention, but, y’know… sales have gone up, at least,” she jokes, somewhat half-heartedly.

And about her new internet celebrity status (there are dozens and dozens of Tumblr pages devoted to her alone) as an out, queer female musician?

“I mean, I hope we’re moving into a time when, like, it doesn’t matter who anybody dates?” she says, somewhat uncertainly. “I’m like, yeah, technically a celebrity, but it still shouldn’t really matter who I’m with. Man or woman. Like, shouldn’t we be past this, now? If I had kissed a guy that night, I wouldn’t have made the front page. There’s just something different about a queer artist, a woman kissing another woman publicly, I guess. And I mean I do get why. When I was a young, baby bi, I didn’t really have any musicians I could look to, to see myself represented. I know how important it is to see people be out and open about who they are and who they love. I don’t mean to imply that I’m taking that for granted. I am so thankful to every person who’s told me that they’ve connected with my story. And to the people who say I’ve helped them in any way, like… truly, that is such an honor.” She pauses, chewing on her lower lip nervously. “But at the same time, I don’t know if I like that we still live in a world where it’s, like, headline news if a low-level celebrity like me just happens to be dating someone of the same gender.” She laughs lightly. “Guess that’s not something I should say to a magazine that focuses on LGBTQ issues, huh?”

I shrug it off. Mitchell’s point is, after all, a valid one. In this modern political climate, there does seem to be something strangely antiquated (if the early-2000s can be considered ‘antiquated’, that is) about a celebrity needing to give a ‘coming out’ interview. But, despite the merits of her argument, I still have a job to do.

I ask her about her burgeoning role as an icon for other young queer women hoping to enter the industry. “I don’t know if I’m the best role model,” she says with her signature self-deprecating manner. “But I am queer. My music is based off of my life, and I am in a same-sex relationship at the moment. My last album was about a woman. And none of that’s a secret. I’m just going to continue to make the music that I want to make, and my sexuality and my current relationship are definitely a big part of my art. I’m not going to apologize for that. I’m just gonna live my life the best I can, and if people want to see me as a role model for that… yeah, I’d be proud of that.”

I wonder how Chloe feels about her sudden thrust into the limelight. Her life as an inauspicious, unknown civilian must be all-but over (at least, for the time being).

Beca is careful with her response. It takes her many long moments to weigh her words. “We both really value our privacy. And with regards to our relationship, well… I don’t want to speak for her. But I do know that she’d prefer it if she didn’t have any of the fame or the attention. Because of that, we’re really doing our best to keep a low media profile, for our families and also for our personal lives.”

**

[image]

Pictured: Beca Mitchell, wearing an Angela Chen Jacket, Skoot Apparel Sneakers, Gap Socks, Stylist’s own tank top, and her own jeans.

**

“But I… we really do want to keep out of the media, as much as possible. But I don’t want people to… A lot of people have contacted me recently, like… way more people than I expected. I get Instagram and Twitter messages every day from young fans; people approach me in the street and tell me that they’ve been impacted by my story; I get letters from people saying that it’s meant a lot to them to see a prominent queer female artist, and… I do feel such a responsibility, now. I understand how much it blows to feel alone and… misunderstood. So, while Chloe and I are trying to keep our private lives private, I don’t want people to think that I’m ashamed of who I am or who I choose to date. That’s not the reason we’ve been keeping a low profile. I’m not ashamed of who I am. So I want to be open about my life. I want people to know that I’m bisexual, and I’m proud of it. And I’m proud of my significant other. But I also want people to respect me, and what I choose to share. I’m sort of a public figure, now, and I signed on for it willingly; like I knew this was coming for me. But Chloe doesn’t really want that life, so… if people could respect my privacy, that would be amazing. I’m not going to stop being who I am and loving who I love proudly and vocally, but I want people to understand that the parts of my life I share are the parts of my life I’m willing to share. Because sometimes — and I think we forget this a lot because of how everyone’s always gotta be documenting their lives on social media and everything — sometimes I think there are some things that should just be for you.”

She shakes her head ruefully. “My publicist is gonna kick my ass. That answer was so preachy and long-winded.” She startles. “Oh shit, can I say ‘ass’?” When I nod in the affirmative, she seems more than a little relieved.

I tell her I understand her desire for privacy. I want to respect her wishes as much as possible, but I’m still dying to know something.

Does she think she’s found her one great love story?

“Chloe’s my best friend,” Mitchell says calmly, with a serene sort of smile on her face. “And she makes me happier than anyone in the world. So if you’re wondering whether I’m ‘finding love’?” She smiles coyly, and looks off to the side. The street outside our café is bustling with activity. A young couple walks by with limbs intertwined, their free hands each balancing an ice cream cone. On a nearby bench, an old man reads the newspaper to his bent-over wife. It think maybe it’s just me, noticing all the sweet signs of romance filtering through the air. (Spring, like I said, makes me think of new starts and new beginnings.)

But Mitchell finally turns back to me. Her smile never wavers. “I would say that it definitely looks promising.”

[terrablaze514]

Being Black + R. Kelly, Living With Secrets, and Writing Catatonic Fanfics

Hey everyone.

I'm up extra early, because this is bugging my mind and heart right now. The words might leave if I don't voice (write) it.

In a few hours, I'll be going to church again. Christian, yes. Predominantly Black, you've guessed it. Both of these cancel each other out. Why?

Despite my suspicions growing up, the vast majority of Black people I knew (family, friends, acquaintances, etc.) were still jamming to R. Kelly's music. It makes all the more sense why he's known as, "The Pied Piper", and that's scary as buck if you stop to think about it.

I've never understood why he was permitted to keep making music. Why the buck does Wendy Williams still have an audience? Why did 2Pac and Michael Jackson get destroyed by false allegations (until their sunset), while R. Kelly is still a free man in the music industry with proof of sexual deviance in multiple court cases?

I was 7 when I was molested by a grown woman. I couldn't approach my parents about it, because she became a close friend to my mother, got closer to other notable family friends, and I was already misunderstood at school and church (Grade 2 was a horrible year). My parents were also coming to terms with their breakup, so it didn't help (because what if they had another physical altercation?). Top that with the ongoing belief that men were innately predators...

October 2018, I've had a nightmare of her stalking me while visiting my hometown (the 514) - woke up in a sweat, purchased Black Panther on Google Play Movies, and watched the movie until my eyes shut again... Because mentally, I needed to feel safe. I wanted Wakanda's protection. And I ended up getting it in my dreams (occasionally). M'Baku and The Jabari Tribe are the best!

Back on topic... So, while I'm happy that justice is happening, I'm also disappointed. Deeply disappointed in The Black Community for sweeping this issue under the rug.👏🏾Every.👏🏾 Single.👏🏾Time.👏🏾 I understand firsthand why it's hard to come forward. Allow me to explain (and these are some of the reasons why going to church is a farce in my book).

I've shared with a few Gundam Wing fans (via Discord) that I've sung in three choirs (four if school curriculum counts). To this day, I still jam to my favourite songs and sing as a secret means to calm down when times are too stressful (and if I have no access to a pen and notebook). So why bring this up? Simply put, during my tenure in the third choir, I was spanked and grabbed on the buttocks for holding the door open for an elderly man. [This isn't funny, so if you're laughing, check yourself or leave my blog ASAP]. Not only did this trigger my fear and cripple my confidence as a young adult, but I wasn't able to focus. I've felt scared... Moreso when I've relayed the incident to a few choir members. They've laughed it off, because it sounded funny to them.

It didn't help that this also happened a week after one of my closest friends had died from cancer (and I couldn't make it to his funeral). So being forced to laugh it off, take it with a grain of salt, and keeping it moving wasn't easy. Also, being Black means you don't cry. "Stay strong," is all people would ever say.

I've also been approached and stalked by some strange men, around my age (no older than 27). I'd be waiting at the bus stop so I can commute to work. Strange man shows up, and requests (to the point of begging) that I take the taxi with him. One week later, he begs me to skip work and come over to his place. For what, only God knows. I didn't go, but I've sent text messages to friends. The majority of them found it funny - except one, who also called to check up on me. If it were up to him, he'd drive across town and set the stalker straight.

That was then.

There was a fellow co-worker (cisgender woman) who used to touch, or feel up my inner thighs and buttocks without my consent, and in the presence of customers. How many times have I reported her, yet supervisors promoted her, and would say, "That's her way of giving people props."

What the heck?

Then, by the time I was 25, I've reached my breaking point despite graduating from college and acquiring two careers to call my own. My physical appearance (gaining weight), marital status ("let's find a boyfriend for you on WhatsApp Messenger"), and popularity were the only things that mattered. Damn it all to the grave.

Dating prospects were more like, groomers. And they were all Christian Churchians.💯 I've never given up the V-card, but I've tried to fit in to the point of mental starvation and social exhaustion. In the worst case scenario, I've heard adults (including a parent) poke rape jokes. What's so funny about that?

We sure as hell did not deserve Aaliyah, because the ignorance is real.

I've ended up writing a fanfic project that deals with the music industry, and emphasizes deep comparisons between a good rep team versus an evil rep team, by pulling bits and pieces of experiences by real artists, as well as my "inability to be more transparent/speak up/get out of my shell", and conceptions of what could go wrong if there was no access to a healthy outlet... Combined them into the realities of the characters I'm borrowing. It's still in progress; I'm a perfectionist, yet, the story needs to be told.

There's a second project where two cousins grow up together in the kingdom, get separated after the death of a family member, and the elder cousin searches for his bestie in America. Friendships are formed, but there's also a rampant rape culture against girls in the community where his cousin took residence... Pedophiles will get killed after witnessing the dismissal of reports by police. Go figure.

Writing these types of things, is an outlet. I don't condone abuse, murder, things of that dark nature, but honestly. I grew up in a rape culture. I need a healthy way to deal with (process) that.

Talking about it to people is only safe enough in therapy sessions. Outside of that, get laughed at. Mocked. Told that You deserve it (or did something to deserve it).

I've contemplated suicide last month. Resurfaced memories do more harm than good... And even if I followed through on December 29th (I'm glad I didn't), everything in this post, especially the woman predator who was a babysitter, is the secret I would've taken to my grave. Who could I talk to without feeling unsafe or unwelcome? Without laughing it off in a dismissive manner? Without assuming that I've done something to deserve it, like forgetting to pull on my panties first?

No one.

I've been taught that my big butt, juicy thighs, bust... Yet fat belly, rolls on my back, and somewhat bouncy arms, are something to be ashamed of. From 14 to 23, I used to sport Beyoncé's figure (used to be slimmer)... Yet I still had to feel guilty for embracing that, because if I didn't cover up... If I walked out late... If I didn't keep up with trends... if I didn't turn up for what... If I didn't drop it like it's hot, turn around and bump bump bump, my body too bootylicious for 'em, 'cause if it's worth it lemme work it... And whenever I did these things...

I am guilty.

Now that I'm older, and I don't do these things as often...

I am still guilty.

Because I grew up in a community and a society that hates rapists and pedophiles while making excuses for rapists and pedophiles if I spoke up. If other girls and women spoke up. If boys and men came forward with their true accounts without receiving homophobic comments, or the overused, "You became a real man, congratulations!" Canada's Supreme Court will not keep a sex predator behind bars for more than ten years. That's all the additional proof you need.

The hypocrisy was real, and it still is.

There was an incident where a little girl complained about a church elder touching her... No one believed her.

Later on in my teens, a teenage boy was falsely accused of sexual harassment, and everyone believed the lie (except his closest friends, whom told her to stop following them around).

Another church elder (and a Bible thumper), fondled my breasts out of spite - and my mother blamed me! The next time I've seen that elder, I've set her straight, but who the hell am I for talking? She's still the most respected because she knows every scripture passage, from Genesis to Revelation, and also knows every volume, word for word, from The Spirit of Prophecy. So she has no sin...

THE LIES!

I was nervous shaky the entire time.

So growing up Black, in a church community, as a girl (now a woman) had many catastrophes. I'm not crazy for putting this out there, just keeping it real. I'll be in church in approximately less than three hours from now, and if anyone cracks jokes or makes demeaning comments about R. Kelly's current and former victims, talking about how they're fast, and how they should've come forward... Nah, Hollywood gets away with sexual deviance against minors. A large percentage of them have bought R. Kelly's music, at music stores and on iTunes/Google Play Music. No surprise, huh? As much as I love my church family, I cannot accommodate the ignorance that's gone on for my whole life so far. *Sigh* This has blackened my heart, I just... I am at a loss, not only for R. Kelly's victims, but every child and youth who will be targeted by men and women who cannot be trusted.

I will always support Black Empowerment, Black Lives Matter and Black History... But I have zero tolerance for the enabling of pedophiles and rapists. Even the jokes. It's distasteful.

If you are a supporter/apologist of R. Kelly, Sparkle, Marques Houston, and any other person who'd used/subjected minors to assault and/or grooming, get off my page. And stop pretending to be a huge Aaliyah fan... We've lost her because the adults in her life had failed in exchange for her fame. We also owe Michael Jackson's family an apology for destroying his character and career under false allegations, while R. Kelly was still a free man, preying on girls and grooming boys to become like him... And all the evidence of his crimes were readily available on the archives while I was in Junior High. While we're at it, Kitti Jones and Drea Kelly need to take several seats. They've had every opportunity to approach the police. They've known what R. Kelly did to all those girls and how it's destroyed their youth. They are the poorest examples of how to put sex offenders in their place, just so they can get money now that #MeToo (who never gave a damn about half of your experiences, unless you were penetrated by a man)... Nuh-uh! The lives that were destroyed by rape, molestation, grooming and exploitation matter more than the money anyone might make from a case that should've been dealt with decades ago! My heart is very heavy throughout this post. I know it's Sabbath hours, but I'm currently listening to "Don't Stay" by Linkin Park, because it truly reflects my thoughts and memories, in the wake of #SurvivingRKelly.

Everyone (especially Black people) who put on R. Kelly during weddings and birthday celebrations, I've taken notes. You will not be trusted around my future children (if it's meant to be). I've never healed, yet. The community does not offer a safe space to heal from the damage that's been done. So when I hear about Chester Bennington (Linkin Park -I hope I spelled his name right), AJ and Nick (Backstreet Boys - their parents stood up for their sons), B2K (especially Raz-B), IMx, Sammy, O'Ryan, the victim of Brock Turner, a few victims of Bill Cosby and that actor from 7th Heaven, the young girl who was sexually assaulted and exploited by that loser who was granted a chance to finish up his studies at UofC (University of Calgary), Natasha McKenna who was stripped, dehumanized and tasered in her last moments by eight men, the former victims of Eddie Long who were forcibly silenced, the girl who was raped, hospitalized and raped again in the hospital by her father and brother... This is real ish. I have no more words. Leave my page if you support R. Kelly... Special shoutout to John Legend for keeping it real. Another special shoutout to Terry Crews who spoke up. To the victims of Harvey Weinstein and Kevin Spacey, you also need to get your voices heard, because you also matter. To the victims of Ryan Seacrest, the same also applies. May Corey Haim Rest in Power, because Charlie Sheen is getting his just reward for what he did decades ago. Although I'm glad B2K is reuniting for tour, I've been conflicted with how R. Kelly wrote your popular hits. That wasn't your fault, though. Your former manager (Chris Stokes - another pedophile) had that set up for your grooming - good thing y'all left TUG behind when you did. Other artists and notable faces in the entertainment industry - you don't have to comment, but I beseech you to STOP collaborating with R. Kelly. What he did to those girls is beyond me. If you keep enabling him, you're now guilty for proving that rape is okay.

It is not.💯

[thehummingindontblameme-blog]

my meeting @taylorswift dream diary

1. i went to a rep concert in chicago and there were waterslides we had to go down to get to the concert, and when i got down the 30 minute long water slide, i met taylor but she was in the fearless black sparkly dress with a country accent, a 13 on her hand, and curly hair?? and she played the entirety of fearless platinum and she invited me on stage because there were only like 20 other people there??

2. taylor invited me to her farm, (does she even own one?) and we freaked out over the piglets and the bunnies and all the baby animals together, i held olivia, and she played her hits/the entirety of the red album at a campfire on the beach while me and 5 other swifties roasted marshmallows and cried.

3. before i went to my concert in santa clara, i had a dream i blacked out during the whole concert, and when a security guard woke me up when the lights were on and he was sweeping up the confetti

4.  i met her at a garden restaurant during the bleachella phase and she invited me to have lunch with her and we talked about how there are apparently secret messages of cleaning products in her songs

5. i was invited to a secret session, but i had to go through a huge long white tunnel with tons of security to get there, but when i got there i walked with taylor along a country road and told her how she affected and saved my life and we both cried but then for some reason security pulled me away as i was finishing trying to tell her about everything, and she told them to stop but they kicked me out before the secret session started and taylor was screaming and telling them to bring me back but they didn’t listen to her

6. i got into loft 89 but i  met taylor with a bunch of pizza in my mouth and when we took our picture my teeth had pepperoni in them

7. my mom had a dream that we were in new york on a ferry and i had an attitude, but she saw taylor swift, my mom asked her if she was taylor swift but taylor swift said “please don’t draw any attention to me i’m just trying to have a nice day out with my friends” and so my mom didn’t tell me we were sitting right next to taylor swift mostly because i had a bad attitude but i wasn’t that mad when she told me because i would never want to make taylor’s life more public than it already is

8. i was at a rep concert, and andrea just walked up to me and invited me to rep room but i accidentally said i had met taylor before but i never had i was just too excited so she told me that i couldn’t go and i cried really hard

9. i literally have a taylor dream every other night but i can’t remember them all right now so i’ll update this later when i think of all of them 

10. so in conclusion, i really love @taylorswift a lot and in the middle of the night in my dreams i meet her but then i wake up and i cry some more

[peaches-of-1]

Training: Secrets Make

DID SOMEONE SAY ANGST? It was me. I said angst. Three whole chapters of it. Smut thrown in here and there!

Hiya, this is a part of my Training Series. You can start from here if you really want to know origin and stuff. Either way, I hope you enjoy!

The House | Mstrlst | Aesthetic Survey

You had been with the boys for three months now. It was about time for finals to start, and they had been fucking with you less. They didn’t make you play with them too long or had mid-day sessions in order to let you have more time to study.

“Your school work is more important.” They said.

Though, they would find ways to make studying more fun with games. Regular and lewd ones. Tonight was Biology and lewdness. There was a study sheet and for every question you got right, they would take off a piece of clothing. If you got a question wrong, then they’d put it back on. If you got them all naked by the end of it, you got to fuck.

You got to fuck. Not for too long, though because you needed decent sleep before your final tomorrow. Your brain was tired, so Yoongi fucked you. There was no reason to use your brain when you were just following orders.

Then he cleaned and tucked you in, kissing your cheek before heading towards his own bed. There was a weird, non orgasmic feeling in your stomach, but you were just way too tired to do anything about it.

The feeling was gone in the morning...for the most part. It was now to small to notice, so you got dressed, got your notes for last minute refreshing and were driven to your car. People would recognize a new car at the boys’ place, so it was kept in a special midway point between their home and the school.

After taking the test, you double checked a few things and then turned your Scan-tron in. You turned your ringer back on and saw the boys had sent you good luck messages while mixing baking soda with dyed vinegar.

You smiled and giggled. Told them how you think it went and they tell you how proud they are of you. Then you head to the nearest food place and grab some food stuff.

“Hey, (Y/N)!” This random voice calls, not nicely. There’s like a double meaning or something that confused you.

You were even more confused after not recognizing the face. It was some chick who was trying way to hard to look like an edgy nerd. Piercings here and there, purple hair, shaved head, old styled glasses.

Anyways, you replied, “Yes?”

“So, are you just now a slut or have you always been a whore?”

Several people looked in your direction. The girl didn’t flinch, but you shrunk beneath their gaze.

Only like 9 people could call you that. Seven were BTS, two were your best friends who were joking. You look at this girl. “Um, excuse me?”

She put her feet on the table, “You heard me, Dick sucker.”

“I did hear you, but I have no idea what you mean. I haven’t done anything to be called anything along those lines. Also, I’m sure I’m not the only girl or guy that would answer to that name.” You leaned back in your chair.

Your passing gay friend high-fived you as he passed by. Then you started eating again, seeing that this chick was just trying to start trouble.

“That may be true.” Miss Edgelord said. “But they don’t suck k-pop dick.”

You stopped chewing and your eyes grew. “What?” You swallowed and a shit eating grin came across her face.

She chuckled, “You heard me, (Y/N). Oh I love this song. You should hear it, too.”

She stuck a bud in your ear and it was a recording of you moaning and calling out Jungkook’s name.

“S-someone’s gonna see us!”

“I promise you, we’re fine. No one is here other than who you already know. Oh yes, just like that.”

Your own whining moans and gasps filled your ear, and you blushed, yanking it away. How did this girl get that? Horror filled you. All she could do was smile.

“Who are you?” You asked.

“Call me Heather. I know everything, (Y/N), and I’m going to show and tell everyone that you’re k-pop’s biggest whore. I wonder what will happen when the world finds out that Bangtan can’t control their dicks, so they got a live in cum-slut.”

“Why?” You weren’t thinking of yourself. “Why would you do that? Did I do something to you? If so, I apologize.” It would ruin the boys’ reputation. “Was it some, was it a joke or something I said?”

She held up a hand for me to stop talking. “I like chaos. I love ruining lives, and that’s that. However, you can stop this from going public.”

“How?” You’d do anything.

She took her feet of the table and leaned in, “Leave them.” She stood up and spoke directly into your ear. “You’ve got a week to say your goodbyes and get your life back to normal, or I make it hell, Princess.”

The purple-haired demon placed something in your hand, and left. There was suddenly a chill in the air that hadn’t been there before. You no longer had the stomach to eat. Ok, first things first.

Were you actually gonna leave? They needed you! They liked you! It took them forever to find someone like you, and you were just gonna leave!?!? You nodded to yourself. Yeah. They could find someone else. They had before. They’d probably find someone better, too.

You couldn’t let this get out. It wasn’t about you. Well, Heather was making it about you. In your heart of hearts, you’d do anything and everything to keep the boys’ rep clean, especially if you were the problem. It’d be best to leave without a trace.

Where would you live? Maybe your friends would take you back in. Also, you could probably get a new job and get an apartment of your own pretty quickly. See, even your plan was simple. All you had to do was do it.

One week after you left...

She was just gone. She hadn’t said anything, but she was gone. Had they done something wrong? Was it just too much for her? Was she starting to fall in love with someone?

Yoongi was in his room much more often now. Jungkook and Tae would play games nonstop, more often rage-quitting than not about the simplest things. Jin just...he was a bit delusional, saying he couldn’t wait for (Y/N) to come back from school so he could play with her. Jimin hadn’t stopped crying for days. Wouldn’t even talk to Namjoon who was trying to keep everyone together while hiding his own pain.

Hoseok...ultimately detached from humans and focused on dance. He sometimes wouldn’t be seen for days on end because of practicing. It was really overexerting his body, but pain was the only thing he wanted to feel, not sadness, not loneliness, just the ache of sore muscles.

There was this one fucking move he couldn’t get right. All the others had it down, but not him. Not him. Not...him. She didn’t stay for him. How did he not notice until it was too late? (Y/N) had stopped talking to them as much. Everything about her was less engaged.

He thought it had just been stress and finals, but there had to be something more. He tried the intro to the move and just stopped moving. No, not this, not tears. Hoseok tried to muffle his cries, but it was no use. He missed her so much and his heart felt so empty.

She wasn’t the one who fell in love this time.

You were wearing high socks, shorts, and a tank top as you leaned on the doorway looking into the living room. Namjoon was sitting on the couch, writing or something.

“Um, Joonie?”

“Yes, Princess?” He called you that every day now. You were gonna miss it.

You scratched your face, “Can you show me how to turn off cameras or can you at least turn the ones off in my room? I’m just feeling super paranoid and stressed, the camera’s aren’t helping.”

Namjoon looked up at you, and you gave him a neutral expression, pressing your lips together into a line. You had no choice but to leave. That girl. That Heather. She could ruin their lives, and you didn’t want that. The boys worked too hard to get where they were in their careers.

He stood and kissed your lips, “Sure. Follow me. I’ll show you how to do it in case you start feeling this way again and we aren’t home.”

“Thanks.” You said and followed.

You had cried earlier. Right now, tears were threatening to spill again, but you held them back until you were back in your room. The curtains on the window door were drawn. You couldn’t have anyone see you pack. You only had seven days.

For the time being, you were gonna live back at home for a bit. It wasn’t too far from the school, and your mom wouldn’t ask too many questions. Mostly just why you were coming home. You’d tell her what you told your friends.

The apartment complex you and Jihye stayed at was being torn down or remodeled or something so you had to move out and would find a new place to stay as soon as possible. It would be fine. Just the memories would hurt for a while. They’d fade, though. Someday.

Someone knocked on your door. You stopped crying and wiped your face.

“Yeah?” You called.

“Are you ok in there?” Hoseok asked. “Sounds like you’re crying.”

You forced a chuckle, “Just finals stuff. Getting a bit frustrated.”

“You know we’re here to help.”

“Yeah, I know. It’s...it’s ok.”

A pause, “Alright. We’re all headed out now. Don’t overwork yourself. Can’t learn anything when you’re too frustrated to think.”

You smiled sadly and swallowed your tears, “Thanks!”

His footsteps retreated and you let out a breath. You had seven days. Seven days to say goodbye before summer began. When the boys were on tour, they’d forget about you. It was for the better.

“At least tell them you’re leaving.” Your inside voice told you. It was a constant war within you.

“I can’t. They’d ask too many questions and then they’d go after her. Then she’d release the information. I can’t risk anyone knowing.”

You looked at the bed. You’d just gotten used to sleeping in it. It was made for royalty, and you’d miss it.

Two weeks after you left...

Jimin had been left home alone since he was feeling too sick to do anything. It was heartsickness. He missed her. His Madame, his sweet (Y/N) and left without leaving a trace of herself behind. The sunlight was gone by the time he woke up from crying himself to sleep.

He walked through the living room and through the hallway to her room. It was meant for the princess they treated her like. Had they not done it well enough? Why didn’t she come and talk to them? Did they ignore her? Did they work too hard? Not love her enough?

Not just sex. Actual love because that’s what it was. They actually loved her. At least Jimin did. She was so sweet. As soft as the comforter of her bed. He remembered how many times they had kissed on here. They usually just cuddled and snuggled in her room.

Helped her with homework. She used to lay her head down on this pillow, even humped it a few times. No one had come in here since the boys carefully went through looking for anything she left behind. Any memento. The bed still smelled like her.

Jimin remembered the last text from her as he held her pillow to his chest. It was out of no where. “I’m sorry. I have to go. Goodbye. <3 ;__;”

No explanation! Just gone! He clutched the pillow tighter and started sobbing. Why did she leave? She was perfect! She was...perfect.

After carting two suitcases full of clothes to your car, you had to stop. The boys were home. They wanted to help you with your finals again, but you said no. You just wanted to sleep, you lied. You weren’t hungry.

During the middle of the night, you went to eat something and then your body craved something more. Goodbye sex. That’s what this would have to be, everything you did this week.

You snuck into Jin’s room where everyone was sound asleep and crawled under his sheets to rub him. He didn’t wake up until you were rutting against his very hard penis.

“What are you doing, jagi?”

“I needed you.” You whisper, hands on his stomach. “I’m sorry. I couldn’t wait Mmm! Your majesty.”

He thrust into you, making you have to quiet a moan. You weren’t expecting him to react so quickly.

Jin shushed you, “Peasant girl is the prince’s secret lover, huh? You really did like that one.”

You nodded. That’s why you chose to do it like that.

“How about you ride me properly?”

“Ok.” You reply and slowly slide yourself onto him. It’s a struggle not to cry out from pleasure.

As you rode him, you thought of how many different ideas and characters you had played for him. The different props he fucked you on and with. You made sure to remember his moans, his quiet moans, as you really wanted to only know happiness when you thought back to your time with him.

Three days after you left...

Jin had trouble sleeping in his own bed after she left. He was too groggy the last time they fucked--so he hadn’t remembered as much as he wish he had--but it was on that bed. She knew she was leaving, but he didn’t. It wasn’t fair for her to have only had a proper goodbye.

No. He shook at his his head with his hands trying to fix his memory. She had only left for the day. She was still a student and so she had classes to go to today. It was a weekend. Then she was out with friends and would be back before too long. She’d be back. (Y/N) would be back. He knew it. She had to. He loved her too much for her to just go away without a proper goodbye. (Y/N) would be back. She had said it herself.

Instead, he slept on the couch. He couldn’t stand to sleep in his own room anymore. Everything reminded the eldest of the girl he loved. He shouldn’t have loved her. Of course she was gonna leave. Nothing he truly got enjoyment out of could last long or forever or end well. That’s how his life was.

Nothing good could stay. Only his career. Well, that was gonna go down the drain now.

As the oldest, he had to act as if everything was ok. Everything could only be ok if she was coming back to them. So that’s what he did. It was insanity or near it, but Jin would do anything to make sure things were fine.

Everything wasn’t fine, but delusion clouded all judgement not just the one inside. Pretend things were perfect. He was the oldest. That was his job. He wasn’t just a handsome face.

TO BE CONTINUED... >

[taylorsparklingswift]

My Taylor Swift story

It was Monday, 9th of October 2017. Me and my European group chat had just spent the whole evening freaking out over that Taylor Swift had reached her follow limit on tumblr and that we would never be noticed. I was devastated because I fell in love with Taylor 2008 but had never got noticed before and it made me really sad that she wouldn’t know that I even exist.

I was in the car, my boyfriend was driving me home and we were as usually listening on Taylor Swift and long live came on. The time was 10.14 pm and I was scrolling on tumblr when I out of nowhere received a message from Taylor Nation, I thought it was some cruel joke and checked the URL a million times. When I finally understood that it was the real Taylor Nation I started freaking out, I was just crying and I couldn’t breath, but yeah I think you understand what im talking about. My boyfriend was like omg have Taylor liked something of yours and I was just NO SHE HASN’T LIKED ANYTHING THEY SENT ME A DM. I tried to read the message a hundred times but all I was able to read before freaking out even more was *CONFIDENTIAL MESSAGE*. I started answer them like “omg is this a joke? It’s not funny! Please don’t joke with me” And then I was like “in case it is for real, here are my information (I didn’t want to risk anything haha). When I realized what it could be and it may be serious I called my mom immediately and she honestly thought that we had been in a car accident or something like that because I was crying so much and she couldn’t hear what I was trying to say. I managed to say that there was nothing bad that had happened, but that I had gotten a DM from Taylor Nation. My mon tried to make me more calm and told me that we could talk when I was home (I was literally two minutes from my home but I couldn’t wait to tell my parents until I came home.

When I came home I started trying to explain everything to my parents and I must say that they were really suspicious. I showed them the 1989 secret sessions video and started crying again.

Fasten forwards to later the same night. I was just on my way to my bed when I at 11:09 pm got a call from New York, and I answered. This woman from Taylor Nation (sorry I don’t remember your name, it was so much happening at once) presented herself and explained everything, Taylor had been noticing me on tumblr and seen how much I love her and how much I care about other swifties and asked if I could travel to London that Friday (Friday 13th) for a secret event. She told me that I could take someone close to me with me so I didn’t have to travel alone, and for me I felt like the safest thing would be to take my boyfriend with me who also likes Taylor and always supports me loving her. They also told me that they had seen my post on tumblr with him and I explained that we had been freaking out in our group chat that Taylor never would notice us now that she has reached her follow limit. She just started laughing and told me that both Taylor and Taylor Nation are really good at lurking fans without them knowing it. AAHHHH WHAT HAVE THEY SEEN?!?! Our conversation went towards the end and I gave her my email so she could sent me more information.

I was shaking the whole time I talked to her and as soon as we hung up I called my boyfriend and told him everything, the only thing he answered was “you do know that your passport has expired right?” Imagine how I started freaking out when he reminded me of that. But I was determined that I wasn’t going to miss this opportunity. I couldn’t sleep all night, I was shaking so much and I felt really sick. Rest of the week I just booked everything and was freaking out like all the time and I couldn’t eat or sleep the whole week and I couldn’t tell anyone expect my parents. LIKE IMAGINE GETTING INVITED TONA SECRET EVENT THAT YOU KNEW WERE PROBABLY SECRET SESSION. Still dying over that….

Fasten forwards to Friday 13th.

I started getting ready like 4 hours before we were leaving to get to the meeting point ( a girl gotta do what a girl gotta do). To get there we had to take 2 trains and bus nr 13 that stopped outside our meeting point (coincidence? Don’t think so). We were there an hour and half early but there were some people there early too and I met @lovingherisred13 and @shakeitoff6202 who I had been talking to before and I was so shocked but happy to see them there.

After a while we got in a line to register and TN was like “hi I’m so glad you could make it!” And then turned to my boyfriend and was just like “oh you must be Martin, Felicia’s boyfriend!” and I died. We got these bracelets that said United Kingdom in reputation front. We went downstairs to leave our stuff and we also had to wait there until we were going on the bus to a secret location. Me, my boyfriend, Bea and Morgen all got on the second bus and we were all saying together all night and freaked out together.

But okey okey, the bus stopped outside this enormous house that we were going in to, there were more security checks and after that we started mingling with everyone and eat all the wonderful food in her kitchen, she had M&M that said REP and also bisques with REP on them, olives, cheese (the best cheese ever), chicken tenders and much more. We talked to Scott and he gave us guitarpics (what a dream!). Taylors mom and Tree and some other people suddenly came down the stairs and told us to go sit in her living room, so we did that and then after a little while of freaking out when we say the chair in the front middle, the goddess Taylor Swift walked in looking like a sexy angel and she sat down and she was like “Hi guys, I’m Taylor” and yes I died, right there, died. She told us that she had handpicked all of us and that she as been lurking all of us for one year and that she had screenshots of our post that she sent to Taylor Nation. She played us the entire album and told us every detail behind every song and what’s to come. All the time she was just her beautiful, precious, sexy, dorky self, and several times during the evening she just looked straight in my eyes and just smiled (and yes I died, right there, again). When she was done she told us that we were going to meet her in pairs in another room and while we were waiting we got to look in the magazines and talk to Taylor Nation. (So awesome!)

When it was me and my boyfriends turn to meet her, I walked in the room and was just in shook that she was there, like she was there, she was (is) a human being for real (no I hadn’t processed that during the whole evening). She say that and just walked up to me fast and just gave me the longest biggest and best hug ever, the kind of hug your mom would give you if she haven’t seen you in 9 years, and I was like this is it, I’m gonna die. And in the hug she told me that she was so happy to finally meet me. When the hug was over she was like “Oh my gosh you have the exact same hair as me, that’s so crazy”, and we talked about that. And then she hugged my boyfriend and thanked him for coming with me and for always supporting me support her. I told her that I’m so incredibly happy to see that she is so happy and she thanked me so much for saying that and said that she knew I was happy too (and looked at my boyfriend) and that she was so happy for me too, and then we hugged again.

I asked her if she could sign my emergencypassport, that I bought just for that trip and she was like I’m so sorry but I cant do that because of rules, I really wish I could! And she hugged me again. And then she told me some stuff about the album that she didn’t tell earlier (but ofc I can’t tell you what) and we hugged again and then we took a picture all three of us and I asked if I could get a picture alone with her and she was like “yes of course sweetie!” And we hugged again. It was then our turn to leave and we said goodbye and I told her that I loves her and she told me that she loves me back and we hugged again for the hundredth time. When I got out I was so shaken up and in shook and I think her mom saw that because she just walked up to me and hugged me and told me that Taylor loves me and that she is so thankful that all us swifties always supports her. She also said that my hair was just like Taylors and I told her that Taylor said the same thing and we just talked for about 10 minutes before Tree told us that it was time for us to go downstairs and wait for our bus. Downstairs in her like gym we where all freaking out and sobbing and yeah…

Then we had to go to the bus and we got a bag with merch and on the bus everyone was like in shook and when we got back to our meeting point all our social media exploded as we told everyone what just had happened.

And that was the best evening in my entire life!

Thank you so much @taylorswift and @taylornation for this incredible and wonderful night. It was truly the most amazing night of my life. I’m just so happy that I got too meet the one person who I have been looking up to for 9 years and who always makes me wanna be a better person. I love you so much Taylor and I just wanted you to know that I’m forever grateful! ✨🌻💛

[enchantedswift13]

My LA Secret Session Story!

So Thursday morning, October 19th, i was checking my tumblr messages because I had been talking to some friends and i had fallen asleep early without saying goodbye, so i was just checking back in with them. As i opened my messages, I had found a message from taylor nation and i don’t think i’ve ever cried harder in my life. I ran downstairs, missed the last step and actually fell to the floor while my mom rushed over to make sure i was okay. I screamed at her that i was meeting taylor and started actually hyperventilating before my mom brought me some water. I quickly replied and they called me the next night and said they were having an event in LA on sunday and asked if i could make it and luckily I could because San Diego is only a 2 hour drive. So I told her yes and after we got off the phone, I started crying again and then had to get ready for an event and pretend like i wasn’t about to cry again. The next day, I went shopping with my mom to find a nice suit to meet her in, but since the weather was so heavy, i ended up only wearing the dress shirt. I drove to LA early sunday to see one of my friends and then got to the meeting spot around 4pm. I was one of the first fans there so i sat by myself for awhile before some very sweet girls like @talk-turned-2-screams @sizzlinswiftie13 @wildesttdreamerr @polaroid-taylor and @teardropsonsmyguitar began approaching me. We all started talking about how excited we were and how unreal it was that we were chosen by taylor to be there that day. When we got to her house, we entered from the side yard and were escorted down to the pool area. Meeting us, there was a vast variety of food like hummus, pizza, sushi, Rep m&m’s, Rep cookies, smart water, diet coke, everything. Everyone was in line for the bathroom, including me, assuming so we could all say “I peed in taylor swift’s house”. We all got to mingle for a bit with each other and then i noticed a familiar song playing in the background. she was playing her spotify playlist and Crowded Places had just came on. That song means a lot to me because it reminds me so much of someone i used to date so i started tearing up and tried to just shake it off because i had been there in taylor swift’s home. I ended up putting my drink on the ground near the pool because everyone had taken the seats around the area, and as we were leaving, my friend accidentally kicks my drink and it flew into taylor’s pool. I didn’t know what to do since we were getting rushed out, so i just walked away and i felt so bad. We got into taylor’s house, and entered this room that seemed like a hang out room and had a bar at the back. I immediately saw Tree in the room and i started freaking out and then we only waited for about 5 minutes before taylor came in from the back of the room followed by Jack, Ashley, Alana, And Ruby Rose. She walked over to the cabinet near me and I just couldn’t believe what i was seeing. She put her hand on the cabinet and i touched it and went “Taylor, your nails look amazing” before her looking directly at me and saying “Thanks, I did them today!” I started crying because I just couldn’t believe she had just talked to me. she was wearing camo pants, a black shirt, and boots with her hair curls everywhere. She was absolutely stunning in person, like so naturally beautiful, and her smile was  so kind and warm. As we were listening to the album, she looked at me frequently and smiled and every time, i cried harder. When it got to LWYMMD, she got up and danced with us and i accidentally ending up stepping on her foot because people were pushing from all around but it was still nonetheless fun. I got to snuggle up with her blankets and her pillow and they smelled SO GOOD. After we got through the songs, she went away for a few minutes because it was super sweaty in there, and then came back to meet us. I was towards the front of the line, and i stood there staring at her for a good fifteen minutes just saying to myself “this is fake, this is fucking fake”. she looks unbelievably beautiful in person, like it’s unreal. When it got to my turn, i turned to her and she opened her arms super wide and i ran as fast as i could to give her a hug. After we hugged, I stepped back and said “you’re real, like you’re actually real” and she giggled and smiled and said “you’re nicole, right?” and i was like dyingggg because like THE taylor swift knew my name. I looked up, she’s so tall, and she saw my make up and instantly complimented me. She was like “i love your sparkles! and you do too obviously, that’s why we’re here”. I was like thank you, my friend did it! And she stood there, just smiling at me.  I asked to hold her hands before saying how much I loved her and how much it hurt me to see her so hurt the prior year. and before i could finish, she says “it hurts me to see you guys hurt too” and i just like paused before saying that i would never stop believing in her or defending her in her absence and even told her that she wasn’t the opinion of those who didn’t know her like she always had told us. i also told her i would never stop defending her no matter what the tabloids said and she squeezed my hands so tight, before pulling me in for a hug. I told her i meant it and then proceeded to tell her how much clean meant to me because it was getting me through a really toxic relationship and she goes “oh i know those” and i thanked her and she smiled so softly. I also told her it was my birthday in a few hours (i didn’t even know what time it was because time is fucked when you’re in taylor swift’s house) and she wished me a happy birthday. I then just told her i couldn’t believe i was there because she hasn’t liked anything of mine in ages and she goes “You were on the list for the longest time” and apologized for her management taking so long to contact me, i lost it. She started saying how she loves my “18 (now 19) and insane” bio and that she loves seeing my funny posts online and i just couldn’t believe she had remembered small details like that. I told her how red deserved a grammy and this girl is so kind, her immediate reaction was “you deserve a grammy” and i was like “no taylor, red deserved a grammy” and she giggled and thanked me and then asked me what pose i wanted to do so i asked if i could hold the grammy and sit in the chair and have her next to me so she of course said yes. So we took the picture, she hugged me one last time, and said “Bye nicole! it was nice meeting you!” and i got handed a merch bag and then we went back to the meeting place and i cried in my car for an hour before driving home. It felt like a dream and I’m so thankful to taylor nation and taylor herself for making this happen.

[outofthewoods]

REPUTATION - ALBUM REVIEW

alright girlies here it is my first impressions (whatever I wrote down after the SS plus a few notes I made when it dropped) I AM LITERALLY....QUITE LITERALLY SHAKING....MY WIG: IS ON MARS 

READY FOR IT: At first I was kind of like…. :/ about this song but it’s actually a really good opener and a banger. Not sure I would’ve picked it as the second single but it goes all the way off. The bass has me shook Line: “he can be jailor burton to this taylor”

END GAME Very…..the weeknd vibes right ladies ?????????? this is like…..taylor’s Instagram baddie moment It is still SO WEIRD To me to hear rapping and Taylor swift in one song. Even tho we have the bad blood remix Im still….shook by Future and Taylor together ??????????? I really like this, it’s not one of my top 5 I don’t think but it’s so different from what I would've thought of for another ed/taylor collab Ed is giving me some don’t vibes..i’m into it…ed talking about the fourth of July is really iconic. Taylor telling the story of how this came about was really iconic too…I can literally picture her and ed getting drunk and being like HOWWWW COOL WOULD IT BE TO COLLAB WITH FUTURE????? LOL and then it actually happening I love her like. talk/shout/singing when she says “big reputation…” Line: “I swear I don’t love the drama, it loves me” Her runs in the last chorus THANK GOD…..I NEEDED THESE VOCALS…..

I DID SOMETHING BAD THIS SONG HAD ME FUCKING QUAKING IN THE SESSION…… “If a man talks shit then I owe him nothing” THE CHORUS BANGS…..IM LITERALLY……MOUTH OPEN SHOCKED I CANT BELIEVE THIS….THE M.I.A. PAPER PLANES MACHINE GUN SOUNDS…. This is so……blank space but……..fucking darker you SINNERS “If he drops my name I owe him nothing, if he spends my change then he had it coming…” The chorus is here again Im bopping so fucking HARD WOWWWWWWWWWWWWW I’M……….CRYING AT THE VOCALIZATIONS OF THE HOOK. I’m pretty sure she said this came to her the same way she came up with “STAY!” in AYHTDWS The bridge ladies LIGHT ME UP!!! GO AHEAD AND LIGHT ME UP YOU FUCKING HEATHENS!!!! THIS SONG MAKES THE WHOLE ALBUM WORTHY OF A GRAMMY Im literally shaking like my skin is quivering….that 2000’s fade out……Please kill me

DON’T BLAME ME This is the hozier…take me to church….taylor swift version The chords are her vocals and that. Is revolutionary, Einstein found dead in Miami Line: “I would fall from grace just to touch your face, if you walk away I’d beg you on my knees to stay” The like…..wopping of the chorus is really just…..gold Her falsetto at the end of the second verse. Wig on mars This is the stoner Taylor swift song we didn't know we needed but are so thankful we have VOCALS IN THE LAST CHORUS….I NEEDED SOME RUNS AND THE PRERELEASES DIDNT GIVE THEM TO ME BECAUSE SHE WAS SAVING HER DESTRUCTION OF EVERY OTHER PERSONS VOCALS FOR THE ALBUM

DELICATE This is very Imogen heap to me…… like the layered robotic vocals. It’s very interesting…..a really good segue from DBM It’s got like a deep house….tropical feel to it that I am really enjoying girlies “my reputation’s never been worse, so he must like me for me” why does that line have me crying Taylor swift you are literally sunshine THIS IS THE CHORUS I REMEMBERED….the is it cool is it chill etc…….that’s what I thought CIWYW was after the SS for some reason ???? “do the girls back home touch you do like I do?” SECOND VERSE LYRICS Got me feeling some wildest dreams type of way she looked at me so much during this song I’m emotional, I was bopping to the chorus and she was laughing at me and winking when the beat comes in during the chorus Not a standout from the album but very cool very different good vibes man

LWYMMD Obviously a bop. I see why it’s in the middle of the album and when Taylor explained the progression of the songs this really makes a lot of sense. I’m just feeling fragile bc Taylor swift grabbed me by my cheeks, pulled me towards her, grabbed my hands, and danced with me during this song. Wow BABY I GOT MINE BUT YOU’LL ALL GET YOURS!!! We literally screamed this in each other’s faces it was so……amazing I will NEVER FORGET The video…..do we even need to remind ourselves of how fucking iconic it was When I first heard this I was so confused I had just woken up in Ireland at 6am to listen and I was like . What is this But the chorus goes all the way off tbh This is like a parallel to shake it off….the themes and messages of……being yourself and rising above what other ppl think of you…..

SO IT GOES… Ok I literally blanked this song from my memory at the session, I think bc it was right after LWYMMD and me and Taylor having our first proper moment of the night “Back against the wall….tripping when you’re gone…” This album is so bass heavy. I’m loving the studio instruments, I thought I would miss the live guitars etc but I really don’t because it doesn’t fit with the album “I’m so chill but you make me jealous” Sis we have learned from 10 years of music from you that you aren't chill al;ksdfnjksdhifbknsdfdkjf I love you mom I love the way she says so it goes! In the chorus “You know I’m not a bad girl….but I do bad things with you…” WHOMST “SCRATCHES DOWN YOUR BACK NOW…. Taylor you've done several numbers on me I stopped counting 8 years ago the whispered 1..2….3……WOW VOCALS….AGAIN……….SCRATCHES DOWN YOUR BACK NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHES REALLY WILDIN OUT HUH

GORGEOUS This is such a cute song. For me it seems like one of the ones I like less, but at the session I remember being so happy listening to it because she pointed me out and called me by name when she was passing out the new merchandise….so I was chillin Also she kept winking at me during the DINGS!

GETAWAY CAR Queen of whisper singing I wanted to leave him….I needed a reason SUDDENLY I WILL ONLY EVER DRINK OLD FASHIONEDS. IVE NEVER HEARD OF ANY OTHER DRINK Okay in my mind I was like this song is :/ but it bangs to be honest! I love the chorus Should've known Id be the first to leave….this song is full of tea ladies This song to me seems like it’s about a rebound relationship that wasn’t so serious/was just a way to release pent up emotions from something awful “X marks the spot….where we fell apart…..” the pre chorus is really out here doing that sweeties The bridge has an interesting modulation that i don't know how to feel about….this whole album is like full of surprises/polarizing musical techniques so this is cool This is Taylor Swift fleshing out a metaphor/concept masterpiece to her full ability. Queen of literature who is Shakespeare I’ve never heard of him Said goodbye….in a getaway car……. The ends of the songs are so interesting on rep…….this one goes off

KING OF MY HEART “I’m better off being alone…” Miss Taylor I’m so glad that you’ve stopped thinking this because you are really….the most WORTHY person of love in the whole wide world… This is probably my least favorite song on the album. It has some remnants of getaway car in it I feel……she’s cute but getaway car is sexy and sexy destroys cute It’s a little repetitive but I appreciate it’s placement on the album………..you move to me like a Motown beat…..alright Miss king of my heart redeeming herself My broken bones are mending……….taylor I love u………why are u drinking beer when u could be having an old fashioned tho…..beer is gross

DANCING WITH OUR HANDS TIED Thank you piano I love a live instrument The story behind this song is so heartbreaking and knowing that makes….the song so much more impactful to me “You had turned my bed into a secret oasis, people started talking putting us through our paces” here’s a big fat FUCK YOU to the daily mail Again the chorus comes in and is so….huge and sprawling compared to the rest of the song…..shaking us to our very cores! I love that you can hear the frantic/anxiety she was feeling throughout the song….like the rushed vocals and drawn out lower notes…..then the chorus just coming in with GLORY I LOVE the instrumental of the chorus so much…..it’s so beautiful and a little 1989 to me. Like very eighties synth heavy We also have some VOCALS! In the bridge and last chorus! the runs are giving me life

DRESS This song is like a …… I’m kind of drunk in the meatpacking district running from bar to bar with someone I love in the cold with big coats on….tea to me The falsetto. Queen Taylor has really been expanding her vocal register and I’m FUCKING here for it “Everybody thinks they know us” circling back to the overall theme of the album. We know what she chooses to let us know and beyond that we’re just fucking guessing sinners This song is like a …… I don't really care what they think of us I just wanna really…………see your dick and I don't care what anyone thinks of that ! THE HAIR BLEACHED LINE……SHE IS LITERALLY THE QUEEN OF SELF DRAGS I CANT SHES SO SELF AWARE ITS UNBELIEVABLE…….she’s like being humorous but also referencing a time in her life that was really shitty for her so. Queen of duplicity “I woke up just in time…” this line says so much about where she was when she started seeing Joe

THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS Oh girlies…..I have been so excited to hear this again since the session. She spilled some major fucking SCALDING tea before playing this so my ass was fully ready to be sloughed The alarms in the beginning…..a champagne sea…..my dream…… This is so fucking tongue in cheek about what everyone said about her #squad “I have to take them away” DEAD this is why she stopped having 4th of July parties klsadjidfnksdfd “Stabbed me in the back while shaking my hand….” Oh no…………WHO WOULD DO THIS TO MISS TAYLOR!!!!!!! “I took an axe to a mended fence….” The mhhhhhmmmmmm………. IF ONLY YOU WERENT SO SHADY SALKJFSDNKFJGM,DFLKNJGIDK WHY IS THIS SONG ABOUT ME SITTING ON TWITTER DRAGGING PEOPLE LEFT RIGHT AND CENTER Hard knock life………..TEA……during the fucking BANGER of a chorus….this is going to be so fun on tour…..SHE BETTER BE A SINGLE!!!!! hE sAiD shE saID!!!!! Here’s to mama…….yes miss Andrea here’s to u queen of the world THE BRIDGE…..SDFLSDMFJKNDNDSLJFKNFDJDSFNSD THIS IS WHY WE CANT HAVE!!!!! NICE!!!!! THINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I cant even SAY IT WITH A STRAIGHT FACE Heres to my REAL FRIENDS! WOW….just wow ladies this is the future liberals want

CALL IT WHAT YOU WANT In my personal onion this is the most vulnerable song on the album. The first verse really has me out here crying in the club The chorus is so cute, this is a low-key banger and I wanna see her flying across the crowd during this song on tour

NEW YEARS DAY So here it is girlies….the most hyped song on the record…… Live piano. Minimal production. The concept behind this is so adorable “Candlewax and polaroids on the hard wood floor….” the most Taylor swift thing I have ever heard This relationship really seems like its forever my dudes she’s in it for the long run. She has never been so confident in a relationship that she’s CURRENTLY IN. She’s opening up DURING a relationship which is like……basically unheard of for her I love how subtle this is….the harmonies on the second chorus….crying in the club again “Hold on to the memories they will hold onto you…..” she said she's had that line ready to go for a while but couldn't find a place for it and here it is being adorable and wonderful also the line “Please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh I can recognize anywhere” Can I just speak on that line again….it is so beautiful and simple and shows how much she’s been through and the pain she has dealt with….and the sadness she KNOWS………..but she’s okay enough to talk about it. Im crying in the club 3.0

INITIAL RANKING: I Did Something Bad Don’t Blame Me Call It What You Want Dress Delicate Dancing With Our Hands Tied This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things Look What You Made Me Do Getaway Car …Ready For It? End Game New Year’s Day Gorgeous So It Goes King of my Heart

[norman-reedus-gossip]

Last Bulk and its a long one

~~mod~~ everything else concerning this topic will be kicked to the modblog. ill try to add to the comments today. i feel like i got ran over so i may not be on at all. sorry for slacking on you and for probably being a world class asshole today. please keep it medium.

Anon: What kind of woman ALLOWS “her boyfriend” to make her hideout so she’s not seen with him? What kind of man DOES that? Be happy for them all you want. I think they look and act like morons. As “adorable ” as people think he is , he seems lately like a total douchebag. Good thing all the fucking booze he consumes gives him the balls to “allow” her be photographed with him. And how fucking desperate does one have to be to let themselves be treated like that? Typical Hollywood. I give this a week.

Anon:Okay, NOW do you think he will make an announcement on Jimmy Fallon about DK? Or that Jimmy will mention it? ~~mod~~  dont know dont care. as long as we get some couch action im good.

Anon:No new stories talk about the trip to italy right before dk dumped pacey. They dont talk about how long nr knew pacey before sky. Wonder how much that cost

Anon:I’m so sad mod….. 😢 Twd’s cast are finally coming to my country and i thinks that is very hard for they bring Norman because he is very expensive…. I mean, Norman is so rich, why he charge that much??! 😢😢 (Sorry for the english) ~~mod~~ aww maybe its not the money but more if he has time. where are they coming? you english is awesome

ahauntedfool: My two cents. I feel badly for disappointed fans who have invested so much time, energy, and possibly even money, on their beloved celebrity, only to see him acting in a way they do not agree with. That must be very hard for them. Maybe I can offer some hope and positivity?I believe no two relationships are alike, and none are black and white. Who really knows everything about their relationship besides them? But it does seem like they are together, and if that is the case I hope they make each other happy. I truly mean that. Love is not something we can plan for, but life is short and happiness is everything. I am still a fan of N, I enjoy many of his films and photographs, his charisma is pleasing, he makes me laugh and he makes me smile. There are some things I don’t like about him, but that’s how it is with people. We are all complex and flawed individuals, and in our imperfections there is beauty. I don’t know much about D yet, but I think I’ll check out her work, watch a few of her films and read some interviews. Maybe I’ll learn something about her that inspires me in some way. With that being said, I think they are an attractive couple, and I love seeing him smile like that. They appear happy in those photos and I hope they are. Maybe this relationship will be good for both of them. Oftentimes we learn from our partners how to be better people.

Anon: Wait for the other shoe to drop on fallon, the baby shoe, lol. He has an extra 0 on his paycheck now, so dk can stay in ny and give up her career while nk goes to ga and cons to keep her in designer duds and pap shots shopping and fashion shows. She can laugh with jdms wife about ppl who pay $$$$ to wait in line for a pic, and we get crappy cgi on twd ~~mod~~ come on the deer really wasnt that bad, if you squint it almost looked real

awesomebrokenheartuniverse: What the fucking fuck??? This is beyond baffling.  The public make out session.  Even as a teenager I didn’t make out on the street for 30 min.  They clearly wanted to be seen.  Have we been fooled by NR with some fake persona all these years?  Has he drastically changed due to DKs influence?  Is he whipped?  Is he tired of keeping it a secret and overjoyed to let it all hang out?  Does she have dirt on him and forcing this on him (sounds crazy but ya never know)? Is this a juvenile shit show for publicity to benefit both of them?  So many questions!  Maybe it’s not our business but when they flaunt themselves like this they are kinda asking for it.  This is like reality show in your face over the top attention whoring.  I feel embarrassed for them.  At least she is age appropriate. I don’t know a lot about DK, but the opinions here are largely unfavorable.  JJ seems like a decent guy.  Why would he stick with her 10 yrs if she’s such bad news?   I keep remembering a quote from AL where he said something like “the longer I know N, the more he is an enigma.”  NR seems totally all over the place to me right now.      

Anon: There’s a video of them kissing now. ~~mod~~ ok

Anon: Hey mod! Sorry to keep adding to this but I’m SO aggravated. Now she’s acting like CS posting pics from his apartment. An her fans are saying to stop bringing up Norman an respect her privacy to people. She doesn’t want privacy! Hence the photo! An the photos taken of them on the street the other night for a hour. If I’m w/ my bf I dont stop and post on SM things from his house. She wants everyone to know she finally got Norman. When will this “relationship” end 😭 personally he deserves better

Anon: Why would Norman be so open about his relationship? This PDA doesn’t fit to him, he never showed so much of his relationship, making out on the street, like in the video it looks like they were making a show. They just stood in the same street walked around kissed hugged just to make a show for the pap, my guess they called him, don’t know why

Anon: Re: the “lie.” Doesn’t it look like Norman’s reps said “friends” because of JJ? Timeline: Pic of Norman and DK at the car looking friendly with story about vacation. Rep said “friends.” Weeks later: picture of JJ kissing and snuggling with another woman at a restaurant. Stories: He’s moved on!! Two - three days later, Norman/DK are completely public. The “lie” was so JJ could say he moved on first. It had nothing to do with manipulating Norman’s fans. Anon: Daily mail has just released an article on NR and DK confirming their relationship and they’ve got a few new pics in there and in one of them NR is looking directly at the camera. I guess we know for sure it was planned and a bit staged now.

Anon: Mod - this was an absolute publicity stunt but I don’t understand why. It makes him look like the biggest possible lying fake asshole alive so why would he want that image? I’m secretly hoping this is some kind of early April Fools day joke.

Anon: Mod when do you think NR and DK became more than just friends? ~~ mod~~ would you be offended if i said i have no idea becasue i dont care enough about them as a couple to even guess. sorry if i sound like a jerk im still not feeling well

Anon: I hope Norman doesn’t think we’re just going to “get over it”? It doesn’t work that way. There is a difference between lying about who you ARE and just simply having a girlfriend. (I won’t even go into how fake SHE is) You Lied to the people that supported you Norman. This isn’t just jealous fangirls. This doesn’t just go away in a few weeks.~~mod~~ im sure he knows it isnt just gonna go away in a few days

Anon: Woke up today with tears in my eyes. Every day I used to go check out all he cool Norman/Daryl fan art on instagram. Now I can’t even look at him.~~mod~~ dont cry anon we can find you someone else to look at.

Jan: Listen up To those deeply upset and disturbed by Norman’s recent actions, please read this - Nothing in your life has actually changes NOTHING! You still breath the same air, work at the same place, hang with the same friends and are surrounded by people that love and care about you in REAL LIFE. You have never, nor will you ever, know the real man behind Norman Reeds and thats probably for the best. All that has happened is that the fantasy you have of him in your head is altered, but you have the power and control to change that narrative back at any point, back to thinking he is kind and sweet and honourable and all the other things that gave you comfort and joy, use him for whatever purpose you want - because I have news for you as a fan/consumer of his brand he is just USING you. He is clever, he will smile and be nice as pie if you are paying for his time, (he is a professional actor), what he is actually like once the show is over, behind closed doors, is probably a very different story that really would shock and upset you. He is part of an ugly dark industry and his values are probably way off the mark to what any of us would consider acceptable. The clues are all around us, the fake hollywood friends he has, the partying showbiz life he leads, his love of attention and the limelight, the blind after blind about his shitty behaviour. It does upset me to see people defending him with the best of intentions, when they have no clue that he doesn’t deserve defending, he is surrounded by wealth and privilege and I highly doubt he cares one bit what faceless avatars on the internet say about him when he is home surrounded by his millions of dollars and fake narcissistic hollywood friends. Me, I love Daryl and I will always love Daryl, he is a real sweetheart and the subject of many a fantasy, Norman not so much, I could never fantasise about someone like him -a shallow and highly privileged actor who can have any beautiful woman he desires at the drop of a hat, and knows it. His priorities are clearly material things, this set up relationship with DK that will be played out in the public eye will just be linked to and part of that agenda in some weird way…(I do have my theories as to why he is so keen to play along with it, but best kept to myself) So seriously people go back to your Daryl (or nice sweet Norman) fantasises… Whatever helps you sleep at night…

Anon: You know what’s even worse than finding out he’s a lying sneaking jerk? That he let her troll his fandom for the whole year. He let us try to defend him the whole time when it was all true. It just shows that his fans don’t really mean anything to him. He didn’t care that she was playing with us and mocking us. It’s just so unbelievable that he is the complete opposite of what he made us believe.

Anon: sorry but I feel betrayed. And before I get jumped on it’s not jealousy or that he can’t have a private life, it’s about thinking one thing about Norman and admiring that person for so long then suddenly finding out that it was all a lie. He made us think that he was our friend but he’s not. he’s laughing at us behind the scenes watching how we buy into the image that he made us think was the real him. it’s not him now. he’s a phony. anyone want walker stalker tickets? don’t want to meet him now ~~mod~~ no need to be sorry anon lots of people are feeling all kinds of way right now. i hear craiglist is a great place to sell those

Anon: God Mod it just breaks my heart to see how fake he looks. Allowing himself to be papped is something I never thought he would do. I admired Norman for being down to earth and real. Where is that man now? He’s gone. He sold out. He’s not who he claims to be. Honest? Lol nope. So this is the real Norman we have been tricked into supporting? He looks just as fake as we know she is. It’s so sad and disheartening and I never thought it would happen to him. He’s just like all the rest. :( So sad.

Anon: Wonder how this will work when he starts filming in May will she go to Georgia she doesn’t seem the country girl

Anon: Mod why do think NR’s reps have the statements that they were “just friends” 3 weeks ago only for them to walk done the street holding hands and kissing now? Do you think NR’s reps didn’t know about the relationship? Or he didn’t consult with them before going public? Or do you think it was all planned? I’m just really confused about the whole thing!

Anon: Sorry…this is a long one… People seem to focus on others being upset because he lied.  But I think a lot of people are upset for 2 main reasons.  One, they really don’t like DK.  It is hard to swallow watching someone you like, date someone you hate.  I had a good guy friend date a girl that the rest of us LOATHED.  She was just a horrible person and we were all so disappointed when he started dating her.  When we asked him why, he just replied, “well, she is not like that towards me”.  Um..ok…so since she’s “nice” to you, it’s ok that she is a a-hole to everyone else?  It lasted all of 4 months, but I just remember we were all so disgusted.  So, anyway, I think that plays a big part in the fan hate.  Fans love Norman and think he is wonderful/nice/kind/good to his friends and fans and they can’t understand how he could fall for someone who is the opposite of all those things.  The second reason is the cheating.  Let’s face it, this didn’t start AFTER she split from JJ.  We would be naive to believe that.  Personally, I think it started during the filming of SKY.  They are together constantly, in the middle of nowhere, I am sure they got very close.  Even if there was nothing physical, they could have been having an emotional affair…which is often worse than physical.  Although we can argue that with his schedule and her being with JJ, they didn’t actually see each other a lot after filming SKY was over, they still could have been texting and calling, thereby continuing the connection and closeness that was formed during filming.  Looking back, I can’t help but wonder if someone DID see them hooking up in a NYC bar (before the break-up with JJ).  If they did in fact have an emotional connection, add a lot of alcohol to that and you can definitely lose control for a minute.  Obviously, this is my own speculation, but no matter when the physical aspect of their relationship developed, I truly believe, the affair started long before it.  As for the people talking about a possible pregnancy.  I can see it.  Even though Norman is pushing 50 and may not want a baby, as some people pointed out, it may not be up to him.  There are many ways for a woman to “accidentally” get pregnant.  Someone, I think it was PR wife, mentioned that DK’s star faded long ago.  She is definitely someone who will do anything to bring attention to herself.  Well, having NR’s baby would certainly bring the spot light.  It may be far fetched but I think DK is really sketchy and I would not put it past her.  I guess only time will tell if there is a baby as well as how long this thing will last.  We shall see…

Anon:I gave a heads up months ago that Diane had a plan and that she and Norman were playing out a fantasy as if they were living their film “Sky”. Health issues included. But guess what comes next (not the end) ;)

Stephanie Kumke: Maybe it´s not DK in the photo, but come on, a naked bully with lights on it with the message “ Waking  up to good News”… ~~mod~~ maybe she got a job that wasnt in Europe

Anon: Ya’ll need to be realistic. Daryl isn’t the cash cow of TWD anymore. Not sure if no one sees this but the ratings last week dropped. Why weren’t they higher? I mean Daryl was in it a lot yet they weren’t as good as the week before. I’ve noticed whenever Carol and the Kingdom are on the ratings go up. Seems like she’s more of a cash cow now. She makes more viewers tune in. So I really don’t get when people say Daryl is the No 1 cash cow. It’s not true. It may have been years back, but not anymore

Anon: It disgusts the shit out of me when I see people support their relationship and are happy and even say DK is gorgeous. Wtf NOTHING on this woman is gorgeous. She’s manipulative, attention whore and snobby. I can’t believe his fans (not all of them) support her. She’s the worst nightmare. Norman went down to her level. She is unsympathetic to fans, Norman clearly isn’t the man he claimed to be. Not sure if I’m more disappointed or disgusted because he played all of us the whole time for his image

Anon: I think some people are not getting it…NR didnt own anyone anything but he was not coherent and yeah he deceived and lied when he said he doesn’t like cheaters and loves honest people. Regardless of course he have the right to date who the fuck he wants. not my problem. now the way he did it, for someone that calls himself honest is very questionable when you can see CLEARLY how this pics were staged. When you stage pics like that and you claimed for years being the opposite of course  people are going to question who you are and who was the person they have been a fan off all this years. People defended him exactly from this behavior. People defended him when people called him sell out and asshole and manwhore and honestly he just proves the others right. This have nothing to do with DK this have to do with him as a person and how he carries himself. He didnt assume her before because he was sticking his dick somewhere else too and the other kick him to the curb.

dandelioncherokee : Interesting. Norman and Diane are not looking AT EACH OTHER in one single picture. A loving couple would do that ALL THE TIME. One word. FAKE. I honestly haven’t got a clue WHY ALL THIS. Oh Norman,you had it going all good for you.Now I can only pray that the universe will give you another chance,so you can try to fix this. Kisses to you,mod ❤️hope you are alright.~~mod~~ i feel like i got kicked down 10 flights of stairs.. you flirting makes me feel better

Anon: I was just thinking about the happy anniversary post and the ‘comment’. Turns out the DK part of that was true and it makes me wonder how many of the other parts were also true. Maya Angelo said when people show you who they are, believe them the first time. Eyes opened, I get it now and I’m just here for wicked gifs, and weird banter. Good things always come from bad, you’re the good thing Mod.

Anon: Pic look good, his fans on ig congrat to him so lol. Congrat to him too. We know here it so far from jealous but it is about who is this guy. Why he won’t hint their relationship at all.jdm said I think he’s single. So he happy it’s foiod but it different story from why he lid like liar, completely behave another and then be another man. And I didn’t see any pic that he look at her face. He smile to ppl. Wake up idiot fans! ~~mod~~ Please dont call fans idiots we all have our opinion

Anon: Another blog says they KNOW that Norman and DK were a thing since Sky. They supposedly have a source but won’t reveal it, they’re also saying no one knows if cheating was involved because no one knows the status of DK and JJ’ relationship. DK moved to NYC in late 2015 to be with JJ AFTER sky was finished. They bought a home together in LA in early 2016. So if her “source” is correct than yes, they were cheating all along, which makes the dec 2015 rumor seem not so false. They’re disgusting

Anon: Who knows…Maybe they both have an agreement? Maybe he agreed to help her with her image by doing this. He may think what’s the harm in helping a friend?? I am soooooo not on her side…I’m just trying to ration it out. Unfortunately we may never know. I still haven’t seen pics of them full on kissing. That one pic where they’re close looks like he was lighting a smoke. Hand holding? Even friends do that. He seemed pretty drunk anyway. Ugh and her IG? Tries to be like N & HC. UMM no.

Anon: Thinking if the 2 of them together makes me so ill but hey…He’s a big boy. I’ve been going thru the stages of grief (as stupid as that may sound) and I don’t regret smashing my DVD copy of Sky! Didn’t much like it anyway lol now I’m past the anger and just sad. I’m not as mad at N as I was a few days ago but I still think DK is a snake. I hope that he guards his heart from her nasty ways! I also think the whole thing with the paps is strange. N is very impulsive and sometimes too too nice!

Anon:Hahaha I share the same first name as DK, so at least I know when Norman is having sex he is screaming my name. Seriously tho at least she is age appropriate and who cares anyway. You are a fan of his work or not no matter who he is boning.

Anon:Is it me or is Norman avoiding liking DK IG posts? I believe he may have been drunk that night and is regretting what he did

rebellacycle:Are you going to watch jimmy Fallon tonight ? Wonder if he will talk about the new relationship. Or just TWD~~mod~~ i will probaly be asleep. probaly just talk about he twd

Anon:

Norman and Diane are happy and in love so the haters have already lost ✌🏼

Anon:

I have a question for those fans who keep saying things like “Be respectful of Norman’s private life!”…. But they’re the ones who are (unnecessarily!) publicizing it. They staged and sold pics and video. In PDA, the P doesn’t stand for Private. If they are not respecting their own relationship, why should we? Also is talking about Norman’s penis size respecting his privacy? So what exactly do y'all mean? They don’t seem to want that. They want people to talk, comment, click the links.

Anon

:Feel better soon Mod! I don’t understand something about the whole DK Shitshow. If this is legit (and not just publicity) then how come no other gossip sites are picking it up??? TMZ doesn’t have anything to say about it after they just ran the garage pics/got his denial?? It looks like People ENews DM UsWeekly and a few less known sites are the only ones going with it, so how come??? I don’t get it! I don’t understand how Norman can be one thing one day and the TOTAL OPPOSITE the next!??! WTAF

Anon: The photos and the video of NR and DK … Looking at it I just feel DK is walking with his trophy. She wants everybody to see her new toy, her little puppy that she will manipulate as she pleases. DK wants everyone to see his new trophy !! While NR smiles like a fool who does not understand the situation. Yes he became the DK puppet

anon:

I appreciate this blog and your work, but you have to moderate some comments that appear on your site. I read comments accusing Norman of lust after teenage girls. This is defamation and it is very serious. It is unbearable to see all this hate and these lies dumped on an actor we have supposed to love. It is all the more intolerable that currently the world is experiencing serious problems. Thousands of people are dying of hunger, London and Paris are the target of terrorists, but some people prefer to waste their time to dumped their hate on Norman. Treat him as if he was a criminal just because he’s in love and he lied because he didn’t want to reveal his private life in the press.I doubt that you post this message on your blog but I needed to say. Many of us live very difficult moments and see all this hate for a simple relationship is ridiculous. Some may express their disappointment but have no right to invent lies and spill their hatred. Sorry for my aproximative English, I hope to find a warm and funny blog. Good luck to you Mod….

~~mod~~ just a few things. 1.tumblr rarely lets me delete comments, the tumblr app hates me…2. the quickest way to get your post deleted is to say “you probaly wont post this”.. i hate that.

Anon:Hope you feel better soon mod. This is for when you do the bulk: at this point I think I’d be happier finding out he did accidentally get her pregnant one drunken night but actually can’t stand her and did this for appearances only and they aren’t really a thing. At least that way he would be the same guy who just made one huge mistake while intoxicated. One night stands happen all the time. But being with her?? it changes everything about him and it makes him a liar.

Anon:

been two days I haven’t looked at anything to do with N and I still can’t get over this. He’s a complete fake. short of telling us he was abducted by aliens and this was an imposter in his body I will never understand. ’s like he just revealed that he is the opposite of everything he made people believe for the past seven years. Liar. Fake. Hollywood. Stupid. Ingenuine. That’s what this makes him look like now. It makes me want to cry. someone say it was all a nightmare. where’s the real norman

Anon

:Happy Today, Mod! I hope your body parts will all in good working order soon. Please take care of yourself. The drama of Norman Reedus means nothing in the long run. Kind people like you who take the time to create community are what matters!

Anon:If DK’s marrage broke down because she cheating then norman gotta run far and fast, they cheat WITH you they cheat ON you. You should look at enty and type in Norman reedus/Diane Kruger this shit been stirring for a while Anon:Will Jimmy Fallon grill Norman about DK? ~~mod~~ dont know

Anon

:Have you seen the pap walk pics & videos?? Omg I’ll swear DK slipped a Mickey Finn in Norman’s whiskey. For him to agree to call the paps on himself, something was totally wrong with him! I don’t recognize that Norman. DK is destructive & opportunistic. She manipulated her way into his life from day one when she recommended him for the SKY role. She is as TOXIC as they come! Wtf’s he doing with her? He’s in self-destructive mode, I pray he comes to his senses in Ga surrounded by good ppl.

Anon:Diane manipulates the media and manipulates Norman. An avid woman who likes to manipulate her little world. How can people defend it? I saw her in truth, she behaves like a haughty princess.

Anon:I no longer see goodness in Norman.

Anon

:Just canceled my trip to San Fran wsc. I was gonna meet him but I can’t even look at him nevermind meet him. How are we supposed to pretend he’s the same guy? He’s NOT what he told us he was! It’s NOT bc of a gf but 1) that it’s HER of all ppl (she is the epitome of famewhore sell out and no one I’ve talked to who met her have ANYTHING nice to say) and 2) He LIED about everything. He’s not any of the things we thought, made his reps look stupid and sold out to let himself be papped. WTF is that

anon

: Personally I’m wondering if she got him drunk, got him to agree to this to make the rumors look true, and that he was too wasted to care. This is NOT the guy we know and love. This is also coming from a mutual friend of his not just some fan. he never calls the media, like TMZ on himself. He’s a private, fairly normal dude, and that’s why I think DK set it up. To boost her American publicity and get noticed for work here. Sad, sick, and sketchy.

Anon: I’m definitely over reading about it Mod but I don’t understand how anything is gonna go back to the way it was anyway so I vote to keep it on the main blog. He’s a lying jerk and this is what we have to see now every day because how can we not if he’s seriously with her. I think I’m gonna have to quit being his fan altogether bc I can’t take her I don’t want to see her ridiculous face every single time he goes anywhere ~~mod~~ here the  thing its an N blog, i dont have to post anything with her in it. im really good at cropping things out of pics.

[teachingoutsidethebinary]

Three Can Play This Game

Summary: Tony likes to play pranks, and things get really interesting when he realizes Steve and Bucky are old enough to be his parents... 

Characters: Steve Rogers, Bucky Barnes, Tony Stark, Natasha Romanoff, Sam Wilson, Thor

Warnings: curse words

Word count: 1703

Tony Stark loved to stir up trouble. It made boring days exciting and got his blood pumping. He got a thrill out of putting Secretary Ross on hold just so he could watch the little light blink on the phone. He would often count to 100 before he picked up again, just to put him back on hold a few moments later.

He loved trying to guess Natasha’s dirty secrets and watching her eyes roll. The conversation would always end with him dodging whatever object was near her hands when she finally got fed up with his antics.

Whenever Rhodey got tired of Tony’s nagging, he trip him with his cane. Since Tony had developed said cane, there were often scorch marks left behind on the walls from the warning shot Rhodey fired when Tony just didn’t know when to shut up.

But the people Tony Stark really liked to annoy were Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes. The Golden Boy and his best friend. Two peas in the cryogenic pod.

“Hey Capsicle!” Tony would call whenever Steve entered the gym while he was there.

“Tin Man, save some of that milk for the rest of us!” he would chide as Bucky ate his cereal.

Steve and Bucky would just roll their eyes and ignore him. And Tony Stark was not one to be ignored...

“Do you need help with something Tony?” Steve asked. He and Bucky had stopped in the kitchen for a protein shake after an intense workout session. Ever since they walked in, Tony had been staring at them intently.

Tony pushed off the island he was leaning on and walked over to the two super soldiers. He uncrossed his arms and pointed to them.

“You’re older than me,” he finally said. Steve and Bucky looked at each other, confusion etched on their faces.

“Yeah…?” Steve asked, as if this was an obvious statement. He was used to the other Avengers teasing him about his age. Heck, Natasha called him a fossil all the time.

“And not only are you older than me,” Tony continued, “but you’re old enough to be my parents.”

“What’s your point, Stark?” Bucky asked, taking a gulp from his protein shake.

“Oh, this is going to be fun,” Tony replied, grinning mischievously. He turned around and walked out, waving his hand over his shoulder as he left.

“Don’t ask me,” Steve said as Bucky opened his mouth. “I have no idea what he’s up to.”

“Moooom, Dad called me mean names!” Tony’s voice reverberated through the small briefing room as he walked in and pouted. He slumped down in one of the chairs and crossed his arms over his chest like a small child. Steve stared at from the other end of the table, completely dumbfounded by Tony’s behavior. Nat and Sam suppressed laughs and Thor looked on like a lost puppy.

Bucky came storming in after him, magnets sticking to his metal arm. “This asshole thinks it’s funny to keep sticking shit on my arm!” He picked one off and threw it at Tony for emphasis.

“See, Mom!” Tony yelled, pointing at Bucky. “Dad’s saying bad words now too!” He got up and ducked behind Steve’s seat as Bucky threw another magnet at him.

“Mom make him stop!” Tony shouted in Steve’s ear. Steve sat up and nearly shoved Tony to the floor when he pulled the seat away.

“Tony, we have a meeting to get to! Knock it off!” Another magnet whizzed by Steve’s ear. “Bucky! Enough with the magnets! He won’t put them on your arm anymore. Will you Tony?” He directed the last statement at the grown man sitting on the floor with an impish grin on his face.

“I won’t, Mom. I promise.” Tony stood up, crossed his heart, and straightened the suit vest. “Well, let’s get this meeting started, shall we?” His cocky, confident demeanor returned, and any childish petulance disappeared as he began briefing the team about their upcoming mission.

Bucky sat in his chair still stewing over the magnets. Steve silently prayed that no one else would cause mayhem before the meeting ended. Meanwhile, Sam and Natasha texted under the table, making bets on who would break first over Tony’s prank.

A hundred bucks says Barnes throws him off the Tower before the end of the week, Sam texted.

Thor peered over Sam’s shoulder and read the text. “I wish to bet against Barnes as well,” he whispered. Sam gave him a small nod of acknowledgement. Nat texted back,

No way, Steve will reign him in. They’ll get Stark back. Just watch.

Bucky grunted as he pushed the barbell up over his chest. Once he was satisfied with the number of reps, he let it fall back into the rack with a loud, metallic clang. As he sat up, he saw Steve walking in with Tony following close behind. Steve’s face was painted with annoyance, and once they got within earshot, Bucky understood why.

“You never play with me, Mom!” Tony whined. “It’s always work this, work that. I wanna play!” He jumped up and down as Steve tried to continue to ignore him. It had been almost a week since the briefing room incident, and Tony had barely let up on the Mom and Dad act. Based on Steve’s current reaction, it wasn’t going to be much longer before one of them throttled Tony to death.

“Tony, for the last time, leave me ALONE!” Steve yelled. Tony stopped dead in his tracks and his lip began to quiver dramatically. Steve paused and for a moment, he felt guilty about yelling at Tony. Of course, that feeling was short-lived.

“Dadddddddyyyy!” Tony pretended to cry. He walked over to Bucky who was still sitting on the workout bench. Tony sat down next to his “father” and wrapped his arms around him. Bucky froze at the contact and looked at Steve frantically.

“Get him off of me,” Bucky mouthed. He grimaced as Tony tightened his grip and pretended to cry louder. Steve walked closer and knelt down to Tony’s level.

“Tony, I shouldn’t have yelled. I’m sorry. But I need you to get off Bucky now before he kills you.” How Steve managed to stay so calm was beyond Bucky’s reasoning. However, those three sentences appeared to have worked wonders because Tony bounded off the bench and out of the gym.

“What. The. Hell.” Bucky said. He rubbed at his arms to try to get the feeling of Tony’s hug to go away.

“Okay,” Steve said, determinedly. “Three can play at this game.” His face broke out into a Cheshire-worthy grin as he looked down at Bucky.

“What did you have in mind?”

Tony walked down to the parking garage. The weather was gorgeous, and he decided it was the perfect day to show off his new Audi to the entire borough of Manhattan. There was only one problem...his car wasn’t there. In fact, none of his cars were there.

Mouth open in shock, he spun around a few times to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. He rubbed his eyes and blinked a few times just to make sure his vision hadn’t gone on him. When he stopped and his beloved cars were still missing, he rushed back upstairs.

“Where the hell are my cars?” he yelled to no one in particular. “FRIDAY, where are my cars?”

“Mr. Rogers and Mr. Barnes removed them from the garage,” the AI responded.

“They...wha-...how?!” Tony yelled.

“I do not know,” FRIDAY replied. “It appears Ms. Romanoff disabled my systems for a period of thirty minutes earlier this afternoon.” Tony let this information seep into his brain. Then,

“BARNES? ROGERS? WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?!” He raced through the different rooms of the Tower until he came to the living room. Bucky and Steve sat patiently on the couch.

“Oh, good, you’re here, son,” Steve said calmly as Tony stormed in.

“Son? What are you-” Bucky put up his hand. “Your mother and I have a few things to discuss with you. Sit down,” he said.

“But-” Tony started. He stopped as Bucky glared at him. “I said, sit down.” Tony numbly sat on a chair opposite Steve and Bucky. Steve cleared his throat.

“By now, you’ve probably noticed your cars are missing.” Tony opened his mouth then shut it again when Bucky gave him a stare that could wither flowers. He opted for nodding mutely.

“Well, cars are for good boys, and lately, you’ve been a very naughty boy.” Steve was enjoying this, Tony could tell. He wanted nothing more than to punch Steve in his perfect teeth.

“The whining, the nagging, it’s enough. You know better. We raised you better,” Bucky said firmly.

Tony was seething. How dare they turn his prank around on him?

“Where. Are. My. Cars.” he stated darkly.

“Oh you’ll get them back,” Bucky said, a cocky grin replacing his firm stare. “But first, your mother and I need you to do a few things.” Steve pulled a small paper out of his pocket and began to read.

“One, the kitchen is a mess. You need to get all the dishes done. Two, when was the last time anyone dusted in here? Make sure you get all the surfaces. We don’t want any streaking. Finally, your father and I think it would be best if you cleaned your room. Make the bed, put away your clothes, the whole nine yards. Any questions?” He passed the list to Tony, who held it like it was a piece of garbage.

“You can’t be serious,” he finally replied.

“Oh, we’re dead serious,” Steve said, standing up. “You were so insistent that we are your parents, so here we are.” He patted Tony on the shoulder and turned around. Bucky followed him and they walked out of the room.

“And Tony?” Bucky called behind him. “No cheating. Sons who cheat don’t get their cars back.” He and Steve managed to join Sam, Nat and Thor in the kitchen before collapsing in a fit of laughter.

Tony looked back down at the list again. He couldn’t believe Steve and Bucky had actually one-upped him.

“Well played, gentlemen,” he said to himself. “Well played.”