#and saw her in the hospital because surge beat her so bad she had to be hospitalized.

[420-what-you-smokin]

Sonic decides introducing surge to whisper is a good idea and gets surprised when whisper says no.

I wonder why she wouldn’t trust surge.

Hmmm…

Hmmmmm….

HMMMMMMMM….

I WONDER WHY-

[missymurphy1985]

Surprises

You and Cillian are on your babymoon, 4 weeks before your first baby's due date. You think you've got lots of time.. your baby has other ideas...

Warnings - childbirth, swearing

*******************************************************

Cillian lifted your suitcase out of the car and carried it into your holiday home in Kerry, you were on strict orders not to lift a finger. 36 weeks pregnant with your first child together, you sighed, trying to remind him you were pregnant, not disabled, but he wasn't having any of it.

"Can I get out of the car now please, your baby is using my bladder as a trampoline!" Cillian laughed and opened the car door for you, taking your hand to lead you out carefully.

"Watch your step, there's rocks all over the path y/n..."

"Cill for the love of God, how many times have we been here? I'm fine, now let me go pee before I do it all over this rocky path, yeah?" You loved how caring and attentive he was being, but it was becoming really overbearing after 8 months.

"I'm just worried about you..."

"Baby I'm fine, the baby is fine, and my legs work just fine, thank you.." you kissed him lightly and walked to the toilet on the ground floor. Okay, it was more of a waddle, but close enough. He had good reason to worry. His ex wife had suffered terribly during both her pregnancies, and he was watching you like a hawk, terrified you'd be the same. You hadn't though, you were strong as an ox and took every day in your stride, enjoying every second knowing it was likely to be your only pregnancy now Cillian was 45 and you were 34. This one certainly wasn't planned, but was very much looked forward to.

Once Cillian had unpacked, and you'd eaten dinner, you were lazing on the sofa watching TV. Your legs hanging over his lap, him gently rubbing his fingers over your swollen ankles.

"Have you decided on names yet?" You questioned.

"I can't choose, I thought you were deciding?"

"Okay, how about we each write a list of our favourites, and we'll go through them one by one?" You went to grab a pen before Cillian glared at you and went to get it himself. You chuckled, how dare you move so heavily pregnant!!

Once you'd written your lists, you sat next to each other of the sofa and began to read from them in turn.

"Sofia."

"Nansy."

"Jacob."

"Daniel."

Each one getting a grimace from the other.

"This is hopeless," you threw the pen down in a huff. "We've been doing this for months, how is it so difficult to choose a bloody name??"

"Baby neither of my boys had names til they were born - we chose days later for them. They just came to us. There's no rush here I promise." You smiled thinking of Aran and Malachy, how excited they were for the new baby you were yet to name. You decided not to find out the gender, you wanted the surprise.

"I'm beat, I think I'm heading to bed. Are you joining me?" You lifted yourself off the sofa, with Cillians help.

"No I'm gonna finish this film, it looks good!"

"Cillian, it's Batman. You're in it. Of course it looks good!" He laughed as you waddled your way to the bedroom, telling you he'd be there soon.

On the way up the stairs, you suddenly felt a pain in your lower abdomen. Thinking it was another Braxton Hicks, you paused on the stairs waiting for it to pass.

"Y/n what's wrong?" Cillian was at the bottom of the stairs. He'd heard the stairs creaking, then stop suddenly so came to check on you.

"Just a Braxton Hicks contraction babe, they started in the car on the way over here. Perfectly normal, totally irregular, all is fine, don't worry."

"Why didn't you tell me it was happening??" He started to come up the stairs to you, worry all over his face.

"Because they're nothing to worry about - just a normal part of my body preparing for the real thing, stop panic- ahhhh...." You felt another. Sharper now, all over your belly.

"This ain't normal y/n, come back downstairs. Let's just keep an eye on these for a while, yeah?" He took your hand and led you back to the living room slowly, watching your every move. You rolled your eyes and followed him, knowing arguing was pointless. These were just Braxton Hicks. Weren't they?

Sitting you back on the sofa, Cillian grabbed his phone from his jacket slung over the arm of the chair in the corner. Opening the pregnancy app on his phone he clicked on the Contraction Timer option.

"Now tell me when you feel it, and then when it stops, okay?" He'd barely got the last word out when another hit you, you froze in pain, gripping onto your belly, breathing until it passed.

"Baby? That one really hurt..."

"Okay, let's see about the next few okay? Just breathe. I knew this was a bad idea, coming out so late on..."

"I've still got 4 weeks, there's plenty of time!"

"Yeah I'm not so sure now babe.. let me know when it happens again."

"Fuck... Now... Oh my god...." You found yourself moving forwards, legs open and your hands grabbing the coffee table. "It's gone..." 15 minutes passed with Cillian holding your hand in one and running your back with the other, monitoring each contraction you felt.

"Y/n these are coming every 5 minutes, and lasting 2minutes each time.. I think we need to get to a hospital.."

"No.. these things take time, we don't need to rush. I don't want to get there and be sent home okay? I said in my birth plan I wanted to be home as long as possible..."

"Yeah, birth plans don't always go to plan y/n."

"Cillian don't, just let me be yeah?" Your eyes glistened with tears, fear surging through you. Cillian kissed the top of your head gently. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to snap.. I'm scared Cill! I'm really fucking scared!"

"I know, so am I and I'm not the one doing the work! It'll be okay, okay? I'm here, and we're going to meet our baby soon... Just breathe, yeah? In... Out... Look at me. In... Out..." He was breathing with you trying to calm you down. It was working until another contraction hit and you cried out with the pain. He held you close, rubbing your back.

"How far apart now?" You grimaced, feeling it pass.

"Still 5 minutes. Lasting 2. It's been like that for 30 minutes. What do you want to do babe?"

"Run me a bath?" Cillian sighed. He was desperate to get you to a hospital and be checked over but your glare told him to follow your lead. You knew your body better than him right now.

Cillian carefully lifted your body into the bath while he stroked your hair and whispered in your ear.

"I'm going to teach him how to play football.. he'll have his own little Liverpool kit before he's walking y/n..."

"Oh it's a boy is it? See I can see you learning how to plait hair and play tea parties on a Saturday afternoon!" You giggled.

"It's a boy, I'm telling you. I only make boys, y/n!" Another contraction, but the warm water eased the pain enough for you to focus more on your breathing. Cillian reached a hand in and held your belly, feeling it tighten and wishing nothing more than to take the pain away from you.

"Okay, make the call yeah? Just call our midwife and let her know what's happening." You nodded to Cillian, finally accepting that this indeed was happening. Your baby was on its way.

Cillian kissed your head and dialled the number for the hospital back in Dublin, it suddenly feeling so very far away right now. Ending the call, he turned back to you.

"She's calling the hospital here in Kerry to let them know to expect us - she said with the contractions the way they are there's no rush if you want to stay home a while. But she warned the second they're 3minutes apart and lasting longer, we need to go, okay?" You agreed, before another contraction hit with some urgency. The water not helping the pain of this one. With it, came a popping sensation and a gushing feeling between your legs.

"Cillian, I think my waters have broken!" You were panicking again until Cillian leaned his head against yours breathing with you again to calm you.

"Time to get out of the bath, come on." He lifted you out and wrapped a dressing gown over your shoulders but another contraction hit you before you left the room.

"Fuck.. Cillian, Jesus.... I can't walk..." your breathing becoming louder and more laboured.

"Baby I need you to walk, we've got to get to the car..."

"Okay... Okay... Get the bag.." Cillian led you to the bedroom where the ready made hospital bag lay waiting, he insisted you took it with you just in case. Wrapping the dressing gown over your bump, you grabbed his arms tight as another wave of pain gripped you. He could feel how hard your belly contracted and brought you into his arms, running his hands firmly down your spine as you cried into his chest.

"I don't think I'm going to make it... I can feel the baby moving down... Cillian..." He looked at your panicked face and paled. He recognised that look, he'd seen it twice before. This baby was coming now whether he liked it or not.

Leading you to the bed he lay you against the pillows gently.

"Fuck... Okay I'm calling an ambulance... Wait there y/n."

"The fuck you think I'm gonna go Cillian??! Disneyland?!" You gasped as another wave of pain took you. "Fuck don't leave me! Please!" Cillian had the phone to his ear talking to the ambulance service. Nodding to whoever he was talking to, he opened your legs and went to grab towels from the closet in the corner of the room. Y/n was panting now, screaming with the pain.

"Cillian I can't hold it!! I need to push! Baby please!" Cillian looked over and saw his baby's head starting to crown between y/n's legs. Feeling a sudden surge of adrenaline, he took charge.

"Okay, push.. come on that's it! Keep going you can do this baby.. push!" You beared down with all your strength, the burning feeling taking your breath away. You could hear the operator on the phone giving Cillian instructions.

"The baby's crowning y/n, don't push... Just pant with me through it.. okay??" He panted with you, one ear on the phone, one eye on his baby, one hand in yours as you squeezed the life out of it. You couldn't hold back a scream as your baby's head finally broke through. A moment's respite, before another contraction hit.

Cillian moved to between your legs quickly, the operator constantly giving instructions. He put the phone on loudspeaker.

"Okay... Y/n look at me. Push! Just a few more and he's here, come on baby..." You looked into his eyes, feeling the strength from them and bore down once again. Cillian was between your legs, listening to the operator as they guided him through delivering your baby. Two more hard pushes and the room was suddenly filled with the sound of your baby's loud cry. You flung your head backwards, completely breathless, as you burst into tears at the most beautiful sound you'd ever heard. Within moments, paramedics had arrived, bursting through the open front door downstairs.

Cillian was in shock, in his arms he held his daughter, the most beautiful, perfect little girl he'd ever laid eyes on. He took one of the towels and cleaned her off as best he could, and lifted her onto her mother's chest, tears rolling down his cheeks. Y/n looked down at her baby, still sobbing.

"A girl... Cillian it's a girl!"

"You did it.. you fucking did it y/n, I'm so proud of you... She's perfect..." He kissed your forehead as the paramedics found their way into the room to check you both over.

Giving mum and baby a clean bill of health, they allowed you to remain home with your baby. Even though she was 4 weeks early, everything was completely fine. Once you'd managed to clean off and relax back in bed in the guest room (Cillian promising to clean the main bedroom the next day), your daughter gently suckling at your breast hungrily, you finally took in just what had just happened.

"Can you believe it? Can you believe that just happened Cill?"

"I told you bringing the hospital bag was a good idea, didn't I?" He smirked at you.

"Ashlyn Rose Murphy." You didn't know what made that name come to you but it did.

"Perfect. I love it. And I love you. Both of you.. so, so much.. thank you for bringing me our girl... Thank you.." he kissed your head and took your daughter once she'd finished feeding, holding her close to his chest. "Now you sleep mama. Ashlyn and I are going to finish watching Batman Begins."

You chuckled and lay down in the bed, sleep coming very quickly following that evening's activities.

@queenshelby

[elianamarie-blog]

The Things You Give Pt 14

Steven Hyde x Read

Happy Holidays and New Years everyone! I can’t believe we’re already 14 parts in. I’m so glad you guys are loving the story! Tag list is open if you want to be a part of it :)

Beep, beep, beep.

           The sound of the heart monitor was the only noise resourcing from the room. Hyde sat beside y/n, watching as her chest gently rose and fell, and listened to Red interrogate Eric from the hallway.

           “What do you mean you don’t know what happened?!” Red asked him in his usual gruff tone.

           “I don’t, Dad!” Eric defended. “All I saw is that she was sick and she was trying to get Fez and Hyde to stop fighting and she just dropped!”

           “And you didn’t catch her?” Red fumed. “She could’ve gotten hurt!”

           “Well, I didn’t expect her to fall!” he responded.

           “Red, honey, your yelling isn’t making anything easier,” Kitty said quietly.

           “For me it is!”

           “Red,” she said more sternly.

           “Well, have they figured out what’s wrong with her?” the worried father asked impatiently.

           “No, they haven’t,” Kitty answered calmly.

           “What’s taking them so long?” he grumbled. “We’ve been here for hours!”

           Kitty blinked at her husband. “We’ve been here for twenty-five minutes.”

           “And our daughter has been unconscious for forty! My little girl is in there now and I want answers, dammit!”

           “Red, she’s fine,” Kitty said, trying to soothe him. “She’s tucked in a bed right now with monitoring and her breathing is normal. They drew her blood and we’re just waiting on the test results.”

           “They need to come faster!” he shouted, causing Kitty to frantically look around and smile nervously as her coworkers stared at them.

           “Hey, Mom, if Dad has another heart attack, at least it’ll save us another ambulance bill since we’re already at a hospital,” Eric said grinning, sarcasm bleeding into his tone.

           “Can it, dumbass!” Red snarled.

           Inside the room, y/n groaned, hearing the arguing from outside and slowly opened her eyes, seeing nothing but white. Her head felt someone was taking a jack hammer to her skull. Steven noticed and waited anxiously by her side.

           “Why do they have to be so loud?” she mumbled.

           Steven sighed in relief and grabbed her hand. “Are you okay? How’re you feeling?”

           “I think so,” she croaked. “I feel like crap and I’m tired.”

           Hyde chuckled softly and leaned over, kissing her head softly. “You scared the crap out of me.”

           “What happened? Am I in the hospital?” she asked, not letting go of his hand.

           Hyde paused, searching her face. “You don’t—? You fainted and hit the ground pretty hard. They think you may have gotten a concussion.”

           “Well, that explains my headache,” she grumbled and rubbed her head. She looked at Steven who was still looking at her with worried eyes. “Where is everyone?”

           “Your parents are out in the hall with your brother, Fez is here but went to find ice cream.” He rolled his eyes at the thought but continued. “And everyone else is on their way.”

           “How long have I been out?”

           “About forty-five minutes. I’m glad you’re okay,” he answered and pulled her hand up to his lips, placing a gentle kiss.

           If it wasn’t for her head screaming at her, her heart would be fluttering away like butterflies, but all she wanted to do was numb the pain. A sharp pain surged through her skull, causing her to hiss.

           “What’s wrong? Are you alright?” he asked her.

           She tried to nod, but that caused more pain to her skull. “My head hurts. A lot.”

           “That’s what happens when you smack your head on concrete,” he answered. “You have a pretty good-sized knot on your head.”

            Y/n reached up and felt her scalp until she felt a painful bump behind the side of her head. She winced at her own touched. “Ow.”

           “Maybe you shouldn’t do that,” Hyde chuckled. “I’m going to go get something to drink. Do you want anything?”

           Her stomach churned at the thought of liquids and scrunched up her nose. “No, but I probably should. I’ll take a ginger ale if they have any.”

           “You got it, doll,” he said and walked out just as the doctor was stepping in.

           “Good afternoon, Miss Forman,” the middle-aged, dark haired man said. “I’m Dr. Kipp. I’ve been looking over you while you were out. How are you feeling?”

           “Not gonna lie, Doc, I feel pretty lousy,” Y/n responded. “I’ve been sick for the last couple of days. Not being able to keep anything down, I’m achy all over…I’m starting to wonder if I have the stomach flu or something. On top of that, my head is killing me.”

           “Well, you passed out due to your blood pressure dropping which caused a lack of blood to the brain, but it’s definitely not the stomach flu,” Dr. Kipp answered casually, setting down his clipboard as he went over to the sink to wash his hands.

           “How do you know that?” Y/n questioned him.

           “Well, it can’t be because you’re pregnant.”

                                                  --Time Skip—

           “How’s y/n doing?” Donna asked as she got to the waiting room, flowers in hand.

           “Oh, that’s so sweet that you got her flowers!” Kitty gushed, making Donna smile. “And she’s awake. The doctor is in there right now with her.”

           “Oh, good,” she said and sat down next to Fez who was quietly eating ice cream. “Where did you get the ice cream?”

           “Oh, I told them that y/n was my wife and they let me get ice cream!” he replied stoically.

           “So, you’re telling me that you hit on her and now you’re telling people she’s your wife?” Hyde seethed, holding a cup of coffee in one and a ginger ale can in the other.

           “Can you kids not fight for five damn minutes please?” Red asked impatiently. “It’s bad enough that we’re here, I don’t want to have to hear about your petty drama.”

           “Hey, don’t get mad at me. You’re the reason she’s here in the first place,” said Fez.

           “Why would it be your fault?” Kitty asked Hyde.

           “It’s not!” Hyde replied. “He’s just saying crap so I can knock his teeth in.”

           Kitty and Red squinted their eyes at the teens for a moment. “What on earth is going on here?” Kitty asked, growing frustrated.

           “Nothing,” Hyde answered through gritted, glaring daggers at Fez.

           Fez returned the glare. “You know, Hyde, I often wonder what it would be like to hook up with my best friend’s sister. Don’t you?”

            Hyde’s expression hardened. “It’s a good thing we’re in a hospital because when I break your bones, you’re already here!” Hyde aggressively moved towards Fez, but was stopped short by Eric getting in between them.

           “Okay! That’s enough,” he sang-song. “Hyde, why don’t you sit over there quietly and don’t beat up Fez.” He turned to Fez. “And Fez? Shut the hell up.”

           Hyde jerked himself away. “I’m going to go give this to y/n.”

           Back in the room, y/n felt like the wind had been knocked out of her lungs. “I’m…what?”

           “Pregnant,” he responded in a faux enthusiastic voice. “That was through the blood test. We’re going to have you take urine test as well. So,” he pulled out a plastic cup. “You’re going to pee in this cup and when you’re finished, pull the string and a nurse will come in and collect it. Then, we’ll do a full examination on you to make sure your head is okay.”

           Y/n nodded numbly and mindlessly grabbed the cup in her hand. “Okay…”

           “Probably not the news you were expecting, huh?” he asked.

           Y/n chuckled weakly. “No. Not at all.”

           “Well, I’ll be back soon with your test results.”

           He walked out the door, leaving y/n alone in the room. Her hands felt numb and she felt like there was static all around her. How could she be pregnant? How did she let this happen? And oh God, what was she going to say to Steven? Her eyes widened. Her parents?!

           A sudden heavy weight was shattered onto her chest and her eyes began to water. How was she going to tell everyone? What if her dream came true and she truly was alone? Could she raise a baby on her own? Where would she live? What job would she have to do to support her baby? Was she even going to be a good mom? Will her children grow up to be decent people? What if they’re born with health conditions? Or they fall ill? Can she even count on herself to get out of bed at 2 AM to go to the 24 hour store to buy cough medicine when they get sick? How do you even change a poopy diaper? How is she going to react when they’re teenagers and they’re learning how to drive or get their first boyfriend or girlfriend? What kind of mom was she going to be? What kind father was Steven going to be? Will he even stick around?

           With all these questions swimming through her head, she didn’t notice Steven walk back in. “I got that ginger ale you—hey, you okay?”

           Y/n snapped her head up as she was yanked out of her thoughts, which she silently thanked heaven above for. “Y-yeah, I’m fine.”

           “You sure?” he asked as he set down the drink on the table next to her. “You don’t look fine. In fact, you look kinda pale.”

           “Yeah, um,” she stuttered, swallowing hard and waved her hand casually. “The doctor says I passed out due to lack of blood to the brain. Blood tests came back normal, but he wants me to take a urine test just to be sure.” Not a total lie. Just left out a part.

           “Oh, okay. Do you need help getting to the bathroom?”

           “I think I got it,” she answered truthfully and slowly got out of bed, barley able to feel her legs. She ambled her way to the bathroom, dragging the IV along with her. She felt Steven’s stare burning a hole in the back of her head, but she couldn’t think of what he was thinking right now. She couldn’t. It would drive her to an anxiety attack.

           She closed the door quietly and baby stepped her way to the toilet. She passed by the mirror and did a double take to her reflection. Her ponytail was a complete rats nest, her eyes had dark circles under them, and her normally rosy cheeks had lost all color. She looked half dead and she wanted to cringe away. She turned her head to the side and saw the swelled up bump on her skull. She winced when she saw it and let out a sigh. She really wanted to curl up into a ball and sleep for 72 hours.

           She made her way to the toilet and shakily did her business in the cup. When she was finished, she left in on the counter in the bathroom and pulled the string. After she was finished washing up, she walked out to meet Steven sitting in the chair.

           “Hey,” he said gently whispered.

           “Hey,” she answered in the same manner. “Where is everyone?”

           “In the waiting room. Do you want to see them?”

           Her heart dropped, but she needed to play it cool. “Yeah, that would be nice.”

           He nodded and opened the door to call them in. She got back in bed with Hyde’s help, making sure her IV wouldn’t get pulled out of her arm.

           “Oh, y/n,” Kitty sobbed and rushed over to y/n who was sitting up fully and wrapped her arms around her. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?”

           Y/n barley reciprocated the hug. “I’m okay, Mom.”

           “When we saw you being loaded up into the ambulance, I thought I was going to die right there,” Kitty responded, stepping away from her daughter.

           “I’m fine, Mom. Really.”

           “What did the doctor say?” she pried.

           “Uh…they don’t know yet,” Y/n replied. “They’re taking a urine sample.”

           “Well, a person fainting is never a good thing,” Kitty stated matter-of-factly. “It means your blood pressure dropped and you weren’t getting enough blood flow to the brain. Those things just don’t happen.”

           “I know. They’re running tests right now,” Y/n said and leaned back against the pillows.

           “When will we find out?” Red pushed.

           “I don’t know,” Y/n responded growing annoyed. “I don’t know anything.” Lie, lie, LIE.

           “Well, we better find out soon,” Red said. “This place gives me the creeps.”

           “If you wanna leave, you can. I’m a big girl, I can leave on my own,” Y/n responded.

           “No, no, I wanna be here in this room when the doctor comes and tells us what’s wrong,” Kitty said stubbornly.

          Y/n’s heart and stomach dropped. There was no way anyone was going to be in this room when the doctor came back with the results. Positive or not, she didn’t need her parents asking questions and then finding out about her and Steven.

           She kept her face and voice as calm as possible. “No, no it’s okay. Really. I don’t know if I want everyone in here anyway. In fact, it’s probably best that I’m alone.”

           “Oh, nonsense. I—”

           “Kitty, if she wants to be alone, then we’ll leave her alone. She’s an adult now. She doesn’t need us in here,” Red said, signaling to his wife that they leave. “Besides, the Packers’s game is on and I wanna go home.”

           Kitty sighed, annoyed. “Fine. Fine, I’ll leave, but I want to hear everything, missy.”

           Y/n’s eyes widened a fraction and her heart beat violently against her blood cage. She could practically feel her blood pumping through her veins. She nodded numbly. “Okay.”

           Kitty nodded and kissed y/n on the head before leaving. She felt some tension leave her body as she watched her parents leave. She leaned her head back against the pillow and closed her eyes, feeling completely drained.

           “Are you okay?” Donna asked.

           “Yeah,” she mumbled. “Just…feeling depleted.”

           “Well, you can’t go to sleep yet,” Hyde said. “You might have a concussion.”

           “I want sleep,” she whined.

           “I know, but I’d rather you be exhausted than not wake up at all,” he responded.

           She glared at him through half open eye lids and grumbled, “I hate you.”

           He chuckled lightly. “I know.”

           The door to the room opened revealing Kelso, Fez and Jackie.

           “Hey, y/n, how are you feeling?” Kelso asked.

           “Bout as great as I look,” she replied, a weak smile playing her lips.

           “So, super sexy,” Fez responded cheekily but that smile quickly faded when Hyde punched his shoulder. “Ow.”

           “Remember: Respect,” was all Hyde said before sitting back down.

           “I heard what happened,” Kelso responded. “And Brooke made me bring you these.” He handed her a small bouquet of yellow daisies and lilies.

           Y/n chuckled, accepting the flowers. “Tell Brooke I said thank you for the nice gesture. And tell her to bring the baby around soon. I want to meet my niece.”

           Kelso’s face brightened. “You…you really think of her that way?”

           Y/n nodded. “Why wouldn’t I? We’ve all been best friends since we were little and it only makes sense that we look at each other more than just friends now.”

           “Like lovers?” Fez asked her seductively.

           “Do you have a death wish?” Hyde spat.

           “Okay, Steven that’s enough,” Y/n said as sternly as she could. “And Fez, shut up.”

           Fez pouted and went and sat in the corner of the room.

           “You know what? My mind is made up,” Kelso said. Y/n stared at him curiously, everyone joining in.

           “Kelso, in order for your mind to be made up, you have to have a brain,” Eric commented.

           Kelso shot Eric a glare before turning his head back towards y/n and Hyde. “I’ve been spending a lot of time with Betsy lately and Brooke is really starting to trust me.”

           “Okay, and that makes up your mind for?” Y/n asked him.

           “Hang on, just let me finish,” he said smiling. “Brooke is starting to trust me so much she’s even allowing me to pick the godparents.”

           “Oh, that’s great!” Y/n gleefully responded. “I’m so happy for you.”

           “And there’s only one rule. It can’t be Fez,” Kelso added on.

           Fez nodded. “That is a good rule.”

           “Godparents?” Donna mumbled to Eric. “Like we need any more responsibilities.”

           “I know,” Eric whispered back, rolling his eyes. “Such a burden.”

           “I’ve been thinking about it a lot and it’s a big deal. So,” Kelso said, stepping closer to the bed where Eric and Donna sat. “Eric, Donna.”

           “Uh, oh,” Eric sang-song.

           “Please scooch over so I can ask Hyde and y/n if they’ll be Betsy’s godparents?”

           Y/n looked at Hyde with excited eyes. “Really?!”

           “What the hell?!” Eric exclaimed.

           “Hyde and y/n?” Donna asked insulted.

           “You picked Hyde and y/n?” Jackie asked, equally insulted. “Why didn’t you ask someone else? Like me?”

           “Because you’re single,” Kelso deadpanned.

           Jackie crossed her arms. “And?”

           “And you need to be in a relationship to be a godparent,” Kelso responded slowly like he was scared to continue speaking. “That’s why they call it godparents. You can’t be single and be a godparent. That’s just stupid.” He laughed and rolled his eyes.

           Jackie stared at him in disbelief, trying to make sense of what he said. “That barley makes any sense, you moron.”

           “Hey, hey, hey, he chose us. Let him speak,” Y/n said not trying to contain her glee. “Not that I’m questioning your choice because, you know, you chose us, but why us?”

           “Because I really trust you and I think you’d be fantastic with Betsy,” he responded sweetly.

           “And you don’t think we won’t?” Eric asked.

           “Yeah, you don’t trust us?” Donna chimed in.

           “Well, to be fair, I’ve seen you drop almost everything you’ve held in your hands,” Kelso responded. “And you’ve never really taken care of a baby.”

           “Yes we have!” Donna defended. “Remember that time last year when Laurie had to babysit that one baby and I ended up changing her diaper when she couldn’t? I was a freakin’ natural!”

           “Yeah, I mean, if you gave me the honor of being godmother, I would be popular, head cheerleader, and voted best legs. This would give me another title,” Jackie argued.

           “Would you guys relax?” Hyde asked everyone. “It’s not that big of deal.”

           “Yeah, it’s not like he’s shunning you guys,” Y/n responded.

           “You’re all still going to be aunts and uncles,” Kelso defended.

           “Yeah, that’s easy for you to say,” Jackie grumbled and joined Fez in the back.

           “We can be good godparents,” Eric argued. “You can trust us.”

           “Eric, remember Goldie, the goldfish?” Y/n asked.

           “Yeah,” he responded.

           “Remember how you killed Goldie by taking him out of the fish bowl?”

           “I needed to hug something,” Eric answered coldly. “Besides, I’m not going to have to flush a baby down the toilet!”

           “Either way, man, thanks. I’m honored,” Hyde said and clapped his hand with Kelso’s and pulled him in for a bro hug.

           “If I have another kid, I’ll make you two godparents. I promise,” Kelso said.

           Eric huffed. “Yeah, yeah.”

           “Alright, I have to take a leak,” Hyde announced.

           “And I’m going to go find some more ice cream,” Fez said.

          “Can you guys make sure y/n doesn’t fall asleep?” Hyde continued.

           “You got it pal!” Kelso responded and watched as Hyde and Fez walked out.

           “I’m not a child,” Y/n responded once they were out of ear shot. “I am perfectly capable of looking after myself, thank you.”

           “Kelso!” Fez called out and barged back into the room. “Kelso, come quick! There’s a hot nurse fight happening downstairs! Hurry before it ends!”

           “See ya,” Kelso said and scrambled out the room, leaving Jackie, Eric, and Donna alone.

           “Yeah, I’m leaving too,” Jackie said pouting. “I don’t want to sit here and be reminded that I wasn’t picked for godparent. I may have to do some shopping therapy to get over it. Bye!” She squealed and walked out, leaving just the twins and Donna.

           “Do you need anything sis?” Eric asked. “Some water? Fluff up your pillows? Relinquish your title of godparent over to me?”

           Y/n gave her twin a look before scoffing. “No, thanks. I’m fine.”

           “Fine. I’ll just go see if they have any teddy bears in the gift shop that reads ‘Not Quite the Best Godparents’ and maybe it’ll be tear absorbent!” With that, he stormed out the room, leaving Elena in stunned silence.

           Donna rolled her eyes. “I better go after him. Last time I left him alone while he was upset, he thought I didn’t care about him anymore and didn’t speak to me for three days.”

           She left, leaving y/n alone in the room. Again. She leaned back once more, enjoying the silence, but now that she was alone again, she realized just how loud the silence was. All she could think was pregnant, pregnant, pregnant.    

           “What am I going to do?” she mumbled to herself.

           The door to the room opened again; Dr. Kipp entering once more.

           “Hi Miss. Forman,” Dr. Kipp greeted. “We got your test results back.”

           She gulped. “And?”

           He sat down on the stool next to her bed and looked her in the eyes. “It’s positive.”

           Her heart dropped completely, and it felt like the wind had been knocked out of her. “I’m pregnant?”

           “I know this is a lot to take in, but we need to gather some more information from you so we can determine how far along you are. But first the basics. What’s your full name?”

           “Y/f/n y/m/n Forman.”

           He scratched her answer down on his clipboard. “Birthday?”

           “May 18, 1959.”

           “So, that makes you eighteen years old, correct?”

           Y/n nodded.

           “Okay, and your current address?”

           “416 Edlebrook Ave.”

           “Beautiful,” the doctor responded and looked up from his clipboard. “Do you know who the father is?”

           Tears started to burn her eyes as she nodded her head. “I do.”

           “What’s his name?”

           “Steven James Hyde.”

           “When was your last menstrual cycle?”

           “Somewhere in mid September.”

           “And today is October 19,” he said more to himself. “So, you are about three weeks along. Now, I’m going to give this information to the nurse and have her give you a pamphlet and a referral to an OB/GYN. I’ll have them give you a call to set up an appointment. Do we have permission to leave a message with someone if you’re not available?”

           “Uh…no, just me is fine, thanks. I’m not ready to tell people yet.”

           He nods. “Understandable. Now, let’s look at your head and see how you’re doing.” As he took out a flashlight and started examining her eyes, Hyde walked back in the room.

           “Hey, Doc. How’s she doing?” he asked.

           “Well, I’m not seeing any signs of concussion, so that’s good.” He turned off the light and started feeling around underneath her jaw to the back of her head where he felt her bump. She winced and he took note of it. “She seems great besides that nasty bump. Just put some ice on it if it starts to hurt and take some aspirin for the pain. Otherwise, you’re good to go.”

           “What about her test results?”

           Dr. Kipp glanced at y/n and saw her terrified look. He glanced back at Steven who looked worried. “Test results came back normal and she’s perfectly healthy.” He noticed Steven visibly relax. “Anything else, she may discuss with you at her discretion.”

           Y/n mouthed a thank you to the doctor who gave her a subtle nod and finished writing his notes on his clipboard. “I’ll have a nurse discharge you. You have a good rest of your night and rest up.”

           Y/n nodded. “Thank you.”

           With that, he left the room, leaving y/n wanting to vomit—and not from feeling sick this time. She continued to sit in her bed, not being able to properly process the information. Her world felt fuzzy and she felt like she was going to pass out for a second time. She could hear Steven talking to her, but it was all garbled and muffled as if she were underwater. Was her dream right? Was she going to be disowned by her family? Is she going to disappoint her mother? Oh no, how is Red going to take this? She and Steven are dead. Dead like road kill.

           She heard Steven’s muffled voice again, but this time louder. She blinked and looked up at Steven. “I’m sorry, what?”

           He knitted his eyebrows at her. “I said, are you okay? Do you need help getting dressed?”

           She shook her heavy head and slowly slid out of bed. “I should be okay.” She untied her hospital gown, allowing it to pool around her feet. She shivered as the cold air hit her bare skin and turned to see her clothes balled up in a plastic bag. She slowly started dressing herself and felt Hyde’s eyes burn into her the whole time.

           She finally looked up at him as she finished putting on her pajama top. “What’s up?”

           “Are you sure you’re okay? You’re acting different.”

           She nodded, not being able to look him in the eye. “Yeah, I think so. Just still not feeling well and feeling a little disoriented from the fall. But I think I’m good.”

           He eyed her for a minute. “Okay,” he responded slowly. “As long as you don’t pass out on me again.”

           She chuckled. “I think I’ll be okay.”

           A knock came at the door and the nurse walked in. “Okay, Miss Forman. Here are your doctor’s notes to help you feel better. Plenty of rest and fluids. And—” She noticed Steven listening to her and she looked back down at the pamphlet in her hands and slid the doctor’s notes over it. “Here’s everything you else need to know. If you have any questions, there’s a number you can call and if you don’t get better or start to feel worse, come on back in.”

           Y/n thanked her and quietly gathered the rest of her stuff and headed out with Steven. He guided her slowly into the camino and started up the car. She rested her elbow on the windowsill of the door and leaned her head into her hand, feeling like sleep will overtake her any minute now. Hyde placed a gentle hand on her thigh and lovingly rubber circles with his thumb.

           “Let’s get you back in bed, yeah?”

           She swallowed the lump in her throat and nodded, not being able to form words in fear she would start crying.

           The drive home was deathly quiet as rain started to fall. The only noise emitting was outside as the rain fell onto the windshield. Not being able to handle the silence, Hyde reached over and turned on the radio, allowing the music to softly fill the car. It eased the tension slightly, allowing y/n to relax.

           He pulled up in front of a supermarket and put the car in park.

           “What are we doing here?” she croaked.

           “Do you want some soup?”

           She gave him a small smile. “That would be nice. Thank you.”

           He nodded and got out of the car, leaving it on so the heater would warm up y/n. Ever since the hospital, she’d been cold and not able to heat up as fast as she normally would. She shivered, realizing she didn’t bring a jacket or her robe. She looked around the car and noticed a blanket behind the driver’s seat. She wrapped her cold fingers around the soft material and realized it was their sex blanket. She crunched up her nose a little, noticing some stains. “Ugh, gross,” she murmured before placing the clean side on her. The stench of sex filled her nostrils, but luckily it didn’t upset her stomach more than it already was.

           She waited in the car for a few more minutes with the blanket pulled up to her chin and listened to the music. Paul Anka came on, singing (You’re) Having My Baby.

           “Would you look at that,” she grumbled and changed the station. Stevie Wonder’s Isn’t She Lovely was on playing. “What the…” she grumbled and changed it to another station. A country song this time was playing. One that y/n didn’t know, but it was better than the others, so she left it on. She listened to the lyrics as they went:

           The girls in New York City, they all march for women's lib And better homes and garden shows, the modern way to live And the pill may change the world tomorrow, but meanwhile, today Here in Topeka, the flies are a buzzin' The dog is a barkin' and the floor needs a scrubbin' One needs a spankin' and one needs a huggin' Lord, one's on the way

Oh gee, I hope it ain't twins, again.

             “Are you kidding me?” She reached over and turned off the radio, choosing to sit in silence.

           Just then the driver’s door opened and Steven clambered inside with a container of chicken soup in one hand and a pack of cigarettes in the other. “Here you go, doll.”

           “Awe, thank you, baby.” She grabbed the container from his hands and allowed the warmth to thaw her icy ones.

           “You turned off the music?” he questioned and started to beat the pack against the heel of his hand.

           “Yeah, there was nothing good on.” Technically not a lie.

           “Ah, makes sense,” he responded and noticed the blanket. He snorted teasingly. “Cold?”

           “No, no, I’m burning up actually. The blanket was so I could feel like I’m in hell.”

           He threw his add head back laughing. “Take it easy, Firecracker. If I hada known you were cold, I would’ve given you my jacket.”

           She smirked at him. “Nah, this is fine. Thanks. Besides, I wouldn’t want you to be cold.”

           “I’ll be fine,” he said and stuck a cigarette between his lips.

           Y/n’s eyes widened and quickly ripped it from him mouth.

           “What the hell, y/n?”

           “Uh, I’m still not feeling well enough. I don’t want hurl all over your car.”

           He scrunched up his nose at her. “Fine. Fair point. But I’m smoking when I get back!”

            Y/n shook her head at him. “What a rebel.”

           “Damn straight,” he responded and turned the car on. “Don’t forget who you’re with.”

           “I couldn’t even if I wanted to.”

           He smiled at her before backing up and driving them home for the night.

                                                 --Time Skip—

           The next couple of days were brutal for y/n. Kitty wouldn’t stop interrogating her and y/n finally told something made up to get her off her back. Kitty didn’t believe her, but she backed off knowing she’ll be back again. She wanted so badly to tell Steven about her pregnancy, but every time she tried, it would come out a different sentence.

         “I’m,” she would start, but right when she would look into his baby blue eyes, she would panic. “hungry. I’m hungry, starving! Can we go get something to eat?”

         He would give her a weird look before agreeing and leaving to buy her food.

           On top of that, morning sickness would rear its ugly head and she would end up being sick at the most random of times. She would be sitting down in the basement with her friends, feeling fine, but then she would feel her lunch coming back up and she would have to haul ass to the nearest restroom.

           Everyone was worried about her, trying to get her to go back to the doctor, but she already knew. She had secretly made the appointment with the OB/GYN and wasn’t going to be able to see her until two weeks out. Until then, she had to keep lying and making excuses.

           “It’s been almost a week,” Eric said one afternoon as they were all huddled into the basement. “You really should go back to the doctor.”

                      “I’d rather not,” Y/n said. “Going to the doctors for every sniff and cough is not my thing.”

                     “But it’s not just a sniffle or a cough,” he pointed out. “It’s like one minute you’re fine and then the next you’re throwing up Mom’s tuna casserole.”

                  “That was a long night,” she countered, remembering that night as she had to lay on the floor next to the toilet for hours because she couldn’t stop throwing up.

             “Well, can you still keep down fluids?” Donna asked. “Like, chicken broth, orange juice, and tea?”

           “Yeah, those are fine,” Y/n responded. “I just can’t seem to digest solid foods. But I was able to drink apple juice the other day with some bread. I’m also not nauseas all day anymore. I think I’m getting better.”

             “Well, if you’re feeling better, wanna go shoot some hoops?” Kelso asked.

             “Nah, but you guys can,” Y/n responded. “Me and Donna can just sit and ogle.”

             “I knew you were checking me out,” Kelso purred and rubbed his chest.

             “Not you, you dork,” Y/n said. “Hyde and Eric.”

                      “You ogle at me?” Eric said disgusted. “That’s gross.”

             “No! Donna is, you dumbass!” Y/n said and stood up while Eric laughed. “Moron.”

             She walked outside to the driveway with everyone behind her. As they reached the driveway, the boys split up into their group while Donna and y/n moved away to watch from the porch.

             “So, Hyde, how’s it been with you and y/n?” Kelso asked under his breath, making sure the girls couldn’t hear.

             “You know, things are going good, but with her being sick this past week, it’s been kinda hard not getting any action,” Hyde responded.

             “Ewwwww! Could you please not?” Eric exclaimed. “I told you I don’t wanna hear it.”

             “I know, that’s why I did it,” Hyde laughed and tossed the ball to Eric. “Your play. Go.”

             The girls watched from the porch, admiring the way their men looked. Y/n wanted so badly to jump Hyde’s bones, but didn’t want to puke in the middle of it and ruin the mood. She and Donna chatted idly as they watched their men get sweaty and hot.

             “Look, I know he’s your brother, but damn does he look hot when he’s all concentrated,” Donna swooned as she watched Eric block Fez’s slam dunk.

             “Really? I think he looks constipated,” Y/n laughed.

             In the middle of the play, Eric turned, facing them while trying to block Kelso from making his shot. The concentration he wore on his face made Donna drool but laugh.

             “You’re right, he does look constipated,” she agreed and laughed even more.

             “I know you don’t think so, but Steven just looks so good when he’s moving around like that,” Y/n said and stared at her boyfriend. “I mean, when he gets all sweaty and flushed, it makes me want him so bad.”

             Donna chuckled. “So, how have you guys been?”

             “We’ve been good. You know with me being this sick, we haven’t really gotten the time to do it or anything.”

             “From the looks of it earlier and hearing Eric scream ‘ew’ makes me believe that Hyde already said something like that to him,” Donna laughed once more.

             Y/n chuckled. “Sounds about right.”

             They fell into a comfortable silence as they watched the four boys play basketball. The entire time, y/n’s heart was hammering against her chest, debating on telling Donna right there. She couldn’t take keeping a secret this big from her best friend. Besides, if she wasn’t going to tell someone soon, she was going to explode.

             “Donna,” she said shakily. “I have something to tell you.”

             Seeing how serious her tone was, Donna perked up. “What?”

             “I need you to promise me that you’re not going to freak out. Because if you do, everyone will hear it and I can’t have that right now.”

             Donna’s heart started beating wildly against her own ribcage, now nervous and worried. “Okay?”

           “And whatever happens, promise me you’ll still be my friend?”

           “Of course! What’s going on?”

             Y/n took a deep breath before looking Donna in the eye. At that moment, she wanted to crawl up in a bawl and just cry. But she knew she couldn’t; She had to be strong. So instead she let out a shaky breath.

             “I’m pregnant.”

@lieswithoutfairytales​ @mdittyz123​ @n-dg-wm​ @undead-sierra​ @random-thoughts-003​ @taysirene​ 

[odd-birds-and-booksellers]

Five times Jo asks Alex to dance and the one time she asks someone new.

The first time Jo and Alex ever dance together, they’re just friends. It’s new…their friendship. Alex isn’t exactly sure what to call it, in the space of two weeks she went from the annoying intern he was happy to keep as nothing more than a work colleague to the person he spent most of his time with. In the last week, she’s spent more nights on his couch than at home and they’ve grabbed dinner together every day. It’s funny they seemed to have fallen into this pattern without any real thought, it was the day after Ben and Bailey’s wedding they’d become inseparable, she’d sought him out at the end of shift insisting she needed pizza and beer and that he was paying thanks to the raging hangover she was sure was his fault.

He didn’t hate it...having her around all time that is. Which surprised him, it had been a long time since Alex had genuinely enjoyed being in someone else’s company for such a long period of time. Even now when Jos’ has one too many beers and is singing along loudly (and out of tune) to Taylor Swift (not Alex’s choice of course) he finds himself happy just to sit and watch her.

“Oh this is my favorite Alex, come dance with me,” Jo calls from where she’s spinning around in the kitchen. She’s reaching out for him, her warm hand against his forearm pulling him towards her.

“I don’t dance.” Alex protests, remaining firmly in his seat. Shaking his head as she continues to pull at him. He tries to keep his smile at bay but he’s secretly amused by the way she attempts to give him a puppy dog look.

“Don’t or can’t?”

“Both…whatever answer gets you away from me.” He grumbles, trying to remove her grip on his arm but she’s quick, tangling their fingers together and giving him another tug.

“Come on Alex…everyone can dance. Just one dance…pretty please.”

He groans but drops his beer bottle down on the counter and follows Jo back to her makeshift dance floor.

“One dance…and you’ll leave me alone?” He asks, cocking his head to the side as he sets one hand on her hip, the other still gripped in hers tightly. He doesn’t know the song well but he finds himself slowly swaying to the beat.

“I won’t bother you until at least tomorrow.” Jo reasons, smiling softly, a triumphant glint in her eyes that makes Alex think he should stop letting her get her way.

Alex's breath hitches as Jo lays her head against his chest a moment later, he’s sure she can feel the way his heart pounds in his chest. They stay that way for the rest of the song, just swaying back and forth and Alex is surprised to find himself actually enjoying holding Jo so close.

“See… dancing isn't that bad right?”

He pulls her closer, tighter until her chest was pressed flush against his. “No…no you're right, this is pretty good.”

The second time they danced was a couple of years later. They’ve just finished furnishing the loft, and Jos’ even surprised herself with how it had turned out. It really felt like a home…their home.

“I know you’re gonna say a record player is pointless, but it looks cute and before you laugh they were on like every Pinterest board I saw so we have to have one.” Jo reasons, hoping this wouldn’t turn into another disagreement as the throw pillows had. Apparently, because it looks good isn’t a good reason to spend money on Alex’s book.

Secretly she loves every argument/discussion they have. There's just something about them discussing their home, her first proper home that fills her with such joy.

Setting up the record player was easy. Jo had found it a nice home against the window of what she’d marked out to be the living room. She’d even picked up a few old records from the store, Elvis, The Beatles, even Ella Fitzgerald.

She set the record on the turntable and brought down the needle, then closed the lid. There was the crackle of static as the vinyl began to spin.

She reached for his hand during the first verse. “Dance with me?” Jo suggested her voice barely above a whisper. “I know you hate dancing but indulge me this one time.” She insists as he reluctantly places his hands in hers, allowing her to pull him in, their chests brushing up against each other as his hand finds her hip and he holds her against him warm and steady.

They sway like that for the duration of the song and Jo takes the time to scan their newfound home. It's everything she'd hoped it would be and more. She feels Alex's hand fidgeting over her spine as the song comes to an end as if he's contemplating ending their dance before she feels his fingertips drift lower, coming to rest on the small of her back.

“You’re happy right? I know you kinda hated this place at first but…”

“I’m more than happy…” He whispers, leaning back as he brings one hand up to rest against her cheek, brushing the loose hair from her bun behind her ear gently. Jo relaxes against him, letting her worries go at his reassuring words. “I’m home.”

The third time they dance together, Alex surprised them both by being the one to ask Jo to dance. They’re at their makeshift engagement party that the kids on the peds ward had insisted on having when Alex informed them all they couldn’t attend the wedding. It felt kinda surreal, to see various hospital staff all filter in as a handful of his patients gather in the family room. All these people gathered to celebrate him and Jo. He’s not sure how he’d ever got so lucky.

“For everyone who doesn’t know Dr. Alex and Dr. Jo are getting married this weekend…” Kimmy announces, tapping the microphone on the makeshift stage as everyone turns towards her. “And all of us here just wanted to wish you both a huge congratulations.” Alex feels a surge of emotion, as Jo wraps an arm around his waist resting her head against his shoulder. Her eyes were a little watery, maybe she was feeling just as overwhelmed as he was.

“So I thought I’d sing a little something for you both.” Kimmy grins, and Alex gives her a small nod, rolling his eyes as the familiar tune from Beauty and The Beast begins. Now it makes sense why she’d been practicing it all week.

“Think we should dance?” He asks, turning towards Jo.

“You wanna dance? You never wanna dance with me.”

Alex furrows his eyebrows at her statement, wrapping an arm around her waist, swaying them gently, “I never wanna dance full stop but with you…with you it’s definitely bearable.”

Jo rolls her eyes “Charming.”

Alex just chuckles as he takes a step back, keeping his hand firmly in hers. When their arms are outstretched, he tugs on her hand until she gets the memo and twirls back toward him. Alex catches her by the waist, grinning down at her as she laughs warmly.

Cheers erupt around them but Alex can’t bring himself to tear his gaze from Jo. She’s gonna be his wife and he for one can’t wait.

“I aim to please” He mutters before pulling her in closer, pressing his lips to hers as a few groans from the younger patients sound.

The fourth time they dance is a given. Their first dance as husband and wife, sure it's not the reception they planned but Avery's penthouse with everyone they care about most in the world feels as close to perfect as you can get.

“Come dance with your wife.” Jo cries as she makes her way through the crowd, reaching out for Alex who’s taken a seat at the kitchen island. He’d been enjoying a moment to just watch everyone around him. Days like this full of love and happiness were kinda rare to find.

“Jo, you know I hate dancing.” He whines but he's already on his feet, allowing her to guide him back through the crowd. He’s not gonna deny her today, not like he ever denied her before either.

She just smiles, and god it makes his heartache knowing that’s the smile he’s gonna wake up to every day for the rest of his life. “I know you say you hate dancing but I think you secretly like it.”

He turned his hand over in hers, wrapping his fingers around her palm before pulling her to him by the waist. Jo’s free arm sliding up to his shoulder as they spun slowly.

“Thank you…”

“For what?”

“Dancing with me even though you hate it.”

He holds their joint hands in the air, letting Jo turn herself away from him. She’s only out of his grip for a split second before she twirls back into him. He catches her, tips her backward until her hair is dangling down over his knee.

“I’ll always dance with you,” Alex whispers, pressing a chaste kiss to her lips before helping her stand straight again. He can hear the buzz of the party around them, see the bright light of flash go off somewhere as Jo wraps her hands around his neck, hiding her face against him.

“Should’ve put that in our vows.”

He’s not sure how long they stay like that, arms wrapped around each other swaying to whatever song is playing whether a slow dance suits it or not. They might be in a room full of their closest friends and chosen family but neither one can focus on anyone else.

“It’s funny…” Jo mumbles after a while, lifting her head so she can meet Alex’s gaze.

“What’s that?” Alex asks, his thumb tracing a soft pattern against the small of her back as her left hand sorts out his.

“In those lifetime movies, I used to watch. You wait the whole movie for the couple to kiss in the last five seconds and then you just assume that they end up together…in reality, it’s probably never a happy ever after.”

Alex frowns, he’s not quite sure what Jo was getting at but if she was doubting what happens next she shouldn’t. If they could make it through today and still end up married and all in one piece then they could make it through every day that came next.

“We don’t have to worry about that.” He smiles, the hand still clutching hers lifting a little higher so she can see the light catch against her wedding set as he runs his thumb across them.

“No, we don’t.”

The last time they dance together is a couple of days before Alex leaves. He seems to have thrown himself into work the last few weeks. He’s so busy he’s almost never home. They’re like ships passing in the night and Jo’s not ashamed to admit she misses her husband.

“Come on…” She mutters, turning the radio up slightly so the music can be heard over in the kitchen, holding her hand out to Alex who’s been staring at various charts since he’d arrived home in the early hours of the morning.

“Not now Jo…I’m exhausted okay?” He sighs brushing her hand away as he turns back to the pages before him.

Jo shakes her head refusing to take no for an answer as she carefully takes the documents from his hand. Setting them down on the table. She cups his cheek, turning his face towards her. “One dance. Come on.”

She watches the internal argument he’s having with himself, his eyes refusing to meet hers.

“Alex you promised…you’d always dance with me...for better or worse...till death do us part?”

He tenses at her words closing his eyes, but before Jo can even question it he’s up, slipping his hand into hers, leading them towards the empty space between the kitchen and the unused dining table with a frown.

“I know Mr. Grumpy…you hate dancing, you've told me before.”

“That’s Dr. Grumpy to you.”

Jo drops his hand only to lift her arms around his neck and Alex sets his hands loosely on her waist.

“I love you.” He breathes after a moment. He leans his head over her shoulder and drops a kiss to the side of her head, wrapping his arms tighter around her waist.

Jo smiles softly at his words as Alex presses her hand into his chest, over his heartbeat. They're gonna be okay, she's sure of it. They hold onto one another, dancing slowly as the song continues.

“I love you too, Dr. Grumpy.”

They keep swaying even as the song ends and another begins, Jo can’t remember what song had played next, but she knows they’d danced to it anyway.

Jo didn't dance much after Alex left. Didn't do much of anything that reminded her of him. She’d got rid of nearly every trace of him. She’d gone into survival mode and removed every last reminder of him from her life. That is except for the few things she just couldn’t bear to lose.

His shirt…the first one she’d ever borrowed. Back when they were just friends and she was crashing on his couch after one too many beers. The same shirt that’s now hanging loosely off her shoulder as she tries to tidy up after her rambunctious toddler, who’s currently making a mess pulling every record out from its cover and onto the floor.

Their wedding album hurt too much to keep. She couldn’t skim the pages without feeling sick. But she keeps one photo…she can’t not. There’s one photo taken at their wedding reception, Jo wasn't even aware of it being taken at the time. She's mid-spin, her hair fanning out around her, hand clutching Alex's tightly above her head. She looks so happy and carefree in that photo but that's not the reason she kept it, no she kept it because of the way Alex's looking at her in it. Like she was the only one in the room. He looks at her so intently that just the photo sets a fire deep inside her. No matter how painful the ending was, she knew how truly loved she was by him.

“Mommy…princess dress?” Luna asks, pulling the worn photo from its hiding space in an old record sleeve. Of course, she's found it, she’s into every draw and cupboard she can reach these days. Her eyes shine as she shakes the photo in Jo's direction.

“Yeah, mommy had a princess dress,” Jo agrees, lifting Luna up from the floor and settling them both on the couch. She’s too young to know that it's a wedding, too little to ask who the man holding her mother is. She was just excited that her mom looked like one of her favorite Disney characters. Jo stares down at the photo, it's not lost on her that she's sitting in the same spot the dance took place.

“Hey, Lulu?” Jo hums, pressing a kiss to the little girl's hair as she wriggles in her lap. “Shall we have a dance party?”

Jo hasn’t had much time to dance these last few years, hadn’t had much desire too but as she stares down at her daughter she suddenly feels the urge to dance again.

Luna nods, as Jo lifts her up off her lap before turning towards the old record player in the corner. She wipes her hand across the dust that’s settled on it before opening it up, taking a second for the slow melody to filter out. When she turns back Luna is already twirling around, her tutu flowing out around her.

Jo laughs as she lifts her baby girl up onto her hip, spinning them both. She throws her head back laughing as Luna squeals in delight, ordering Jo to keep spinning until they're both dizzy and their giggles drown out the music.

[isshebreathing]

I had an unexpected weekend off and it’s too hot to be outside today, so five stories in one weekend is too much for me to catch up with. Thanks everyone for your positive response so far, I’ll definitely keep working on them.

If you are triggered by dark stuff and death fantasy you can skip part 2 and come straight to part 3 without missing anything.

Chronic Asthma Part 3

We were over staffed at the hospital so I volunteered to leave. I had been working so much that my girlfriend Emily and I were like ships passing in the night. She would have just gotten home from her bar tending shift and we could eat dinner in bed then fall asleep watching a reality show like a normal couple would. Emily has a bachelor’s degree in fine art, but she still bartends because it pays more money. I’ve always felt guilty about that, once I was done with med school I would be able to make more money and she wouldn’t have to work. She could tell the men who made passes at her to fuck off without fear of losing precious tips or worse yet, her job.

“Coming home early” I texted “dinner and tv?”

I didn’t get a response

“???????” I sent.

She might have been in bed, when I called her this evening she sounded tired and short of breath, she said she had been running to catch something.

The thought crossed my mind that Emily was not okay. She had had chronic asthma since she was a child as a result of the poor air quality in the Appalachian town she was raised in. Sometimes late at night I would feel her start awake and I knew she was having a nightmare of one of the two times she had stopped breathing entirely in her life.

I pushed the thought out of my head, Emily had always accused me of overthinking things and turning them into a medical crisis, it was a side effect of seven years of med school I guessed.

I sent another text “Fast food tacos?”

I got no response, “she’s probably in the shower,” I said to myself.

My anxiety didn’t fade though, I thought we had food at home we could make. I ordered a car on my phone to shorten the 45 minutes the train would have taken. I tried to get the thought of my girlfriend struggling to breath on the floor out of my head and tried to replace it with the pleasant warmth and surprise I’d see on her face when I came home early for an unexpected date night.

I bounded up the stairs and opened our door, I was surprised that our cat Walter didn’t come to greet me, he must have been confused by my shortened day.

The kitchen and living room and hallway lights were on, and I could see that our bedroom light was on too, but the shower wasn’t running. “Babe, you left the lights on again,” I said frustratedly expecting her to say “don’t mock my fear of the dark” jokingly in reply but I didn’t hear anything.

“Babe?” I said again with no response.

“Emily?” I said louder, now making my way down the hallway.

I turned into our room and saw my worst fears realized, Emily was laying in the fetal position on the floor, face turned gray, inhaler and nebulizer scattered around her. She had an asthma attack that turned into a breathing crisis, she was in respiratory arrest in front of me.

I rushed over to her and put my face close to hers, “Emily,” I said again trying to shake her awake. She looked into my eyes for a brief moment before they rolled back in her head and fluttered closed. I put two fingers under her chin and felt her heart sputter to a stop, she was in full arrest now.

I saw her cell phone on the floor next to the handset I insisted on keeping because 911 services could better trace your address on a landline. I picked up the handset and realized it was already connected. “Ma’am? Ma’am can you hear me? Help is on the way” a dispatcher says calmly on the other end of the phone.

“Yes, I just walked in and my girlfriend is in full arrest, I’m a doctor, I need an ambulance.”

The dispatcher responds but I don’t care what they say. I lay Emily flat on her back and rip off her fitted bar t-shirt. I grab the knife from my pocket and slice off her bra, exposing her graying chest as her large breast flopped to each side. I started compressions and yelled “Emily you have to come back okay.”

Her lifeless body lay unresponsive, rocking inward as I pounded on her chest, “and ten and eleven and twelve” I push away any thoughts of arousal that I feel from her naked body needing me to pump it’s heart for her. “And twenty-seven, and twenty-eight, and twenty-nine, and thirty” I move up towards her head and tilt it back, I try to give her a puff of air, her cheeks puff out but her chest lays still.

I realize her airway is completely blocked and run to get the medical bag I keep in my closet, I pour iodine on her throat and place my knee on her forehead to stabilize her.

I have seen this procedure done in the real world twice, once on a training video and once in my ER rotation, I have never actually done the procedure. My mind goes into a trance, I am no longer a frantic girlfriend I am a medical professional performing a medical routine. I grab a scalpel and make a small slice in the skin of her throat covering her trachea, I make a few more careful slices though skin and fat and muscle taking care not to slice too deep. I take some gauze and soak up the blood as I find the trachea. I put a small slice in the organ and mucus and blood immediately start coming up, I place my two fingers into the hole so I don’t lose it and grab one of the clear plastic tubes I had set out for the procedure, I slip the tube into her trachea as a sickening gurgle lets out all of the fluid that had been stuck in her airway. I snapped on a breathing tube and an ambu bag. I began to breathe for her. Her chest rising each time I squeezed breath into her.

The adrenaline of the initial crisis was fading fast. I was trying to do compressions with one hand and respirations with the other. Emily had told me horror stories about air hunger and how terrifying it was, I needed to help her heart beat and also keep air going to her lungs.

I started to panic because I didn’t know what to do next, do I just keep her partially alive until help comes? How long could she stay this way?

I choked down my panic as the EMT’s rushed in, and took over, I was surprised how aroused I was seeing a man forcefully pump my girlfriends chest while someone else squeezes a bulb to breathe for her.

I snap back into the present as the third medic is asking me questions. “She’s 28 years old, she has a history of asthma, no known history of a heart condition…..”

My mind trails off as the severity of what is happening hits me, I lose my composure and start to sob and I begged, “Emily please stay here with me, please stay alive,”

I watch the scene unfold as the paramedics put two white pads on Emily’s chest, one between her breasts and one On her side. I lose all medical knowledge as I watch a surge of electricity shoot through her body contorting it in an unnatural horror. The shock does nothing, the v-fib that the drugs gave her has turned into a flatline.

I watch in horror as the slip a board under her to raise her chest more, making her large and graying breasts fall further to the side, they snap a machine over her and turn it on, the machine makes an unnatural squeaking noise as it beats on her chest 100 times a minute.

I forget that I am a doctor, I forget my medical training, this isn’t a case in front of me this is the woman I love.

“Are you hurting her?” I ask as the machine pounds into her over and over and over again.

“We need to beat her heart for her,” the paramedic replies.

For a moment I think it’s too much, her hands are strapped to the side of the machine that is violently pounding her chest, making her shoulders shift inwards, her belly bulge, and feet rock inward with each compression pounding into her battered body. A tube sticks unnaturally out of her mouth attached to a blue bulb that someone has to squeeze to make her chest rise with breath. “It’s too much to expect her body to take this to stay.” I think, but thought of living without her snaps me back to reality. I am almost a doctor, a medical professional, I will do anything it takes to keep my girlfriend alive even if it’s with machines.

They load her into the back of the ambulance and despite my protests make me sit in the front with the driver.

I text my colleague in the ER, “headed in with Emily, bad asthma attack to full arrest, get prepped to start life support. I can’t lose her”

“Oh god Jen, we will do whatever it takes” she replies.

[snakebites-22]

My Favorite Color is You

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A/N: This is my first Peter Parker fic and first fic on this site. I really hope you like it and feedback is welcome but don’t be a bully please. Thank you @dreamofaprilsblog​ for the prompts “Do you need to go to the hospital?” and soulmate AU. Sorry for this being a day late, but I hope you still enjoy it anyways. 

Warnings: fire, almost mugging, burns, hospitals, slight angst, petty teenagers, mentions of a person being followed (comment if there’s anything else I should add)

Word Count: 3175

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: Peter Parker is very desperate to find you, his soulmate. He’s looked for you in every person he makes eye contact with. Guys, girls, he’s looked for you in everyone. Well, one fateful patrol leads him to discover his new favorite color. 

Side note: I tried to make this as gender inclusive as possible so I used “they” to describe the reader’s pronouns, but just imagine your own whenever “they” is used if it isn’t your pronoun. Peter is bi in this story. If there is a point where I accidentally specify a gender please let me know so I can fix it. Enjoy! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Peter knew about soulmates. He’s read about them in books, learned about famous soulmates in class, and even heard about them in real time from people lucky enough to find theirs. He, of course, was not that lucky. Stupid Parker luck. He knew from what he’s heard and learned that the world actually isn’t dull shades of gray with black and white, but it actually had color. Real vibrant colors like red and purple and green, things his brain didn’t have the capacity to imagine. He knew that all it took was eye contact with the right person to change his world. Too bad he hadn’t found those eyes just yet. 

He was sitting on top of a random apartment building while on his usual nightly patrol bored out of his freaking mind. There just wasn’t anything good tonight. He helped a little girl get her kite down from a tree and one man needed help catching his dog who had gotten off his leash, and yeah he was a cute dog, but he could be doing something better. He could be finding you. Of course, he didn’t know who you were yet. Just a bright, beautiful figment of his imagination, and his heart ached for you. Was that even possible? To long for someone he wasn’t even sure existed? Well, guess it is because he’s living proof of the pitiful feeling. 

A loud yell shook him from his depressing thoughts and he jumped up quickly. 

“Finally,” he muttered with a small grin as he shot a web in the direction the yell had come from. He swung as quickly as his agile body allowed and soon landed down on the pavement in front of an alleyway. He looked around cautiously and could feel the prickling sensation that was his Peter t- Spider Sense. It was his Spider Sense. He shook his head a bit and tried to remain focused as he crept down the dark passage. 

 “I don’t want any trouble, lady,” Peter heard a low voice hiss from the gloom. “Just want whatever cash and shit you got on ya. Don’t be a bitch about it.” 

Peter scowled and kept walking until he was able to make out two figures in the dim light the street lamps provided. A young woman, maybe late teens or early twenties, was pinned up against a wall while a man who was obviously older stood before her, a small knife in his right hand. 

Peter sighed softly. “Y’know,” he started as the criminal dude jumped. “If you want money you should probably just get a job like a normal person. I hear the Burger King down the street is hiring.” 

The guy quickly turned around and tried to slash at Spider-Man with the knife which the boy effortlessly ducked and grabbed his assailant's arm, twisting just enough that he dropped his knife. The man grunted in pain and swung at him again, but Spider-Man dodged and countered with a kick to the man’s abdomen. The force of the kick sent him flying back into the opposite alley wall and before he had time to even look up, the young hero webbed him to the dirty brick. 

“Karen?” Peter whispered softly.

“The police are on their way Peter. Good job,” the AI responded.

Peter smiled beneath the mask. “Hey, thanks.” 

The boy turned around to see the girl still standing against the wall, breathing deeply. His heart jumped a bit as he realized that she was about his age, and also very pretty. Try as he might to keep it down, hope surged in his chest as he made his way over to her. 

“Excuse me, miss? Are you okay? Do you need to go to the hospital?” He asked quickly as he did a small glance over her.

“No, I believe I’m alright. Thank you Spider-Man,” she breathed out. 

She slowly looked up at him and Peter looked into her eyes and-

Nothing… they remained a light grey color just like the rest of his surroundings. He couldn’t help the small disappointed sigh that left his lips before he forced himself into a smile. 

“That’s good. I’m glad. Um… do you live far from here? I could walk you home if you want.” 

The girl shook her head and gave him a tiny, hesitant smile. “My car is right down the street. I was walking there so that I could get to the library where my girlfriend is probably waiting for me when that guy grabbed me. Speaking of her, I should probably get going. Thank you again.” She smiled hesitantly and waved to him before walking away and taking out her phone, probably to call this girlfriend. 

Peter sighed again and watched her to make sure she got to her car before looking back at the man webbed to the wall. “Does everyone have a soulmate except for me?” he questioned without really expecting an answer. Nevertheless, the almost mugger shrugged anyway. 

Peter scowled before jumping up and climbing the alley wall. He stood on the roof and waited there until the police arrived to take the guy into custody, and once they were gone so was Spider-Man. 

-------------------------

Peter entered his bedroom through the open window and crawled along his ceiling until he was over top of his loft bed. Looking over his shoulder to make sure he didn’t accidentally fall onto the floor, which definitely didn’t happen a lot, he let go and flopped onto the bed with a huff. He tugged his mask off of his head and tossed it over the side in a fit of petty anger. 

May, who must have heard him come in, opened the door and gazed up at him. “Long night?” she asked softly to which Peter just shrugged, not in the mood to really talk to anyone. 

“Well, I got us some Chinese food if you’d like it.” Peter heard the door creak behind her as she turned around and walked back towards the rest of the house. He would have preferred to stay in bed, but the incessant growling of his stomach said no, causing him to get up. After changing out of his suit annoyedly, he went out and joined his aunt. 

Aunt May was sitting at their small dinner table with a plate of chow mein, glancing at the TV which was playing the news report of the latest Spidey save. Peter walked over and sat down in his usual seat across from her. When she looked up at him, she smiled sadly.

“I got you some dumplings and noodles. Also they gave me, like, a ton of fortune cookies. I don’t know who needs sixteen fortune cookies, but apparently it’s us.”

“You counted?” Peter asked with a little chuckle.

“Hey. That many fortune cookies needs to be counted,” May retorted with a smile as she saw her nephew laugh. 

They both began eating, Peter slow at first but then diving in once he realized exactly how hungry he was. 

Once they finished eating, Peter helped pack up the leftovers and clean the dishes. As he loaded the dishwasher, Aunt May asked softly, “what’s on your mind tonight? The guy you fought?” 

Peter shook his head and sighed. He finished loading the dishwasher before turning to Aunt May to answer. “No I just… how old were you when you met Uncle Ben? And found out he was your soulmate?” 

Aunt May looked slightly taken aback by this question and pursed her lips a little. She always did that whenever Ben was brought up. “I was 23, I think. Yeah… yeah somewhere around that age. We met at this resort one summer. That’s also where your mom and dad met.” She smiled a little at the memory and Peter watched her with slight pain behind his eyes. “God, when all four of us saw color for the first time, well, we were so surprised of course, but it was really, really amazing. Why do you ask?” 

“I just… nothing. Just curious,” Peter answered with a tight smile. “I think I’m gonna head to bed now. Tired. From the fight.” 

Aunt May nodded and Peter trotted back to his room. Before he reached the door, he heard her call to him from the kitchen. “You’ll find your soulmate Peter. I know it feels like forever and you just want to meet them now, but I promise you’ll find them soon.” Peter glanced back at her before walking into his room without saying another word. 

-------------------------

The next couple of days were a consistent and normal blur. Peter had school, then patrol, then repeat the next day. Everywhere he went he looked around for his soulmate. At one point, this really cute curly haired boy walked past him and he felt his heart skip a beat as he looked into his dark eyes, but nothing again. He sighed in disappointment as the taller boy walked away from him, leaving him to continue his stupid quest. 

That had happened two days ago. Now, Spider-Man was patrolling the city, swinging between buildings. It was a relatively quiet night. He helped this one kid find his mom when he got separated from at a park, and he also walked a young woman back to her apartment because she thought she was being followed. After double checking, it didn’t look like she was, but then again that was probably because the shithead saw Spider-Man and turned around. But all-in-all, it was very quiet and chill. That is, until the explosion happened.

Spider-Man quickly started swinging in the direction the loud sound came from, wondering what the hell that was about. It didn’t take him long to find it. A restaurant he happened to pass by a lot was burning up in giant, pale flames. He jumped down and quickly ran inside the burning building. 

There was fire everywhere. The heat crashed against him like a ferocious wave. It reminded him so much of his fight with the Vulture that he hesitated a second before continuing to run inside. It looked like most of the people had already gotten out or were running for the exits. 

“That way over there,” Spidey yelled to the people running past him. “Is anyone else still in here?” He called out as he ran further into the building. Weak coughing came as a reply. Someone ran up to him and grabbed him while coughing viciously into their arm. 

“Spider-Man,” the person said in harsh breaths. “Please you, you have to help. The back room. My friend－” 

“I’ll get to them. Get yourself to safety.”

They nodded and ran out the building while the young hero ran in the direction the person had gestured to. He could still hear the weak coughing from earlier, but now he was hearing a tiny “help” and “please” that made his heart ache. He dodged out of the way of falling debris and hissed in pain when he backed into a burning metal rod from an overturned table. Still, he pressed on until he reached the backroom. 

The smoke was immense. From the damage it looked like this was the epicenter of the explosion. 

“Hello?” he yelled over the roar of the fire. He wasn’t sure if he could even be heard over everything, but a weak call answered him. 

“O-over here.”

Spider-Man jumped over more burning debris as he frantically looked around. His eyes widened when he finally saw them. A figure lay trapped beneath a large chunk of wood that had once been the ceiling. They looked badly burned and were coughing harshly and breathing in rough, raspy breaths. 

He ran over to them and started to lift up the wood despite the burning in his hands, causing the person below to cry out. Spidey yelled in pain as he managed to lift the debris off of them and throw it to the side. 

He quickly crouched down to look at the person he just rescued, and he was met with the most beautiful pair of e/c orbs to ever exist. His jaw dropped as he quickly ripped off his mask, his mask that was now the most vibrant and bright shade of a color he had only ever heard about. He looked back at you, your eyes impossibly wide as you choked out a small, “you?”

Peter nodded. “Me..let me lift you up okay?” You nodded a tiny bit and whimpered loudly as Peter gently wrapped his arms underneath your battered body, lifting you up into his chest. He winced a little from the pain in his hands and his back, but he pulled his mask back on before running out of the now rapidly collapsing building. 

The fire was so much brighter now. Reds and oranges and yellows. He could see the burning blue curtains hanging in the window. The shades of green and brown and the colorful painting on the wall that were all turning to black and grey ash. How horrifyingly beautiful.

He ran over to where the ambulances were parked and looked around frantically as he saw the EMTs and paramedics treating people and getting the most badly hurt people on stretchers and into the vehicles. 

“Do you need to go to the hospital?” He heard from behind him. He turned around and saw a paramedic looking at him. 

“N-No no but they do,” Spidey stated as he held you tightly to his chest. Your eyelids were nearly closed and your breathing was ragged. 

The paramedic quickly called her team over and they gently took you from his arms. They laid you out on the stretcher and got to work on getting you on a breathing mask and looking at your wounds. His breath caught in his throat as he began to clearly see how bad your wounds were. Harsh red burns covered your skin, especially your lower body where the wood had pinned you down. 

For a moment it was so hard to focus, the sirens and yelling was overwhelming, the bright lights were blinding him, the heat was still so immense, he could hear your heart and your breath so impossibly loud, and just all the colors－

It was all so much he almost didn’t notice the team taking the stretcher you were on away into an ambulance. Taking you away into the ambulance. Away from him. He was not having any of that. They were not taking you away when he just finally found you. Your gorgeous eyes looked at him with fear and desperation as they rolled you away. 

“Wait!” he cried as he followed after them. “Wait please you have to let me come with you. I have to go with them.” 

“Are you family?” an EMT asked him with a puzzled expression. 

“No no I-I’m not but－”

“We’re only allowing family to－”

“I’m their soulmate!” He shouted. “Please. Please don’t take them from me.” 

After a moment, just one single moment where Peter could feel his chest constricting and he could sense your eyes on him and his heart was beating way too fast, the EMT nodded and Spidey joined them in the ambulance. 

He sat down beside your stretcher and gently took your hand. He stared into your eyes that had started to fill with tears, and he very lightly gave your fingers a squeeze despite the sting in his own hand. You offered him the tiniest smile, and then the ambulance drove off, taking both of you with it. 

-------------------------

It had been several hours. You were now laying in a hospital bed with all of your burns bandaged and your wounds attended to as Peter sat in a chair beside you, his own burns taken care of as well. 

Aunt May had stopped by earlier to check on him and also see you. They talked a bit about all of the colors. How bright they were or how dull they were and how your eyes were his new favorite color because, God, how could one thing be so beautiful? However, he couldn’t see your eyes now as you slept peacefully. Instead, he was staring in fascination at the Spider-Man suit. He really went around in such a bright red and blue suit? How has he not been shot and killed yet?

He was shaken out of these thoughts by the sound of the bed sheets rustling. He quickly looked up and was met by his favorite color. He smiled widely and sat up straighter as you offered him a tiny smile. 

“Hi,” he breathed out. 

“Hi,” you whispered back. 

You both stared at one another for a moment that was both awkward and yet somehow comforting. You cleared your throat a tiny bit before murmuring, “Can I have a drink?”

“Drink? Oh uh yeah of course, sorry.” Peter quickly sprang up to get you a glass of water from the water dispenser over in the corner. He walked back over and carefully raised the glass to your lips, your hand coming up to gently rest over his and he would be a huge liar if he said he didn’t blush as red as his suit. 

He set the empty glass down on the bedside table and sat back down in his seat, pulling it a tiny bit closer to your bed. 

“So,” you began softly. “Spider-Man is my soulmate?”

“Yeah, I guess so,” he laughed softly. “My name’s Peter. Parker.”

“Y/n,” you answered. 

He smiled one of the biggest smiles that he’s ever smiled before. It was one of those where it leaves your cheeks aching afterwards. 

“What?” you asked, an eyebrow raised.

He shook his head quickly, his curls bouncing along his hairline. “Nothing just… your name is so perfect. You’re perfect.” 

“You found me in the pits of hell and you’re going to call me perfect? You’re an angel.”

He definitely did not blush at that statement. Nope. Not Peter Parker. 

He laughed a little and looked at you adoringly. He could already tell he was the luckiest guy alive. 

“So, uh, I should probably ask this just to um make it official and all of that,” Peter mumbled after a moment. “Would you like to go out sometime? I mean, obviously once we’re both healed and everything. And… afterwards maybe be my significant other?” 

You laughed a little and Peter felt his face fall and his inside twist up in nervousness. Did he do something wrong? What was happening?

“Yeah, of course. I’d love to go out with you Peter Parker.” 

He beamed widely at you as you smiled back. You both sat for a few minutes in silence and at some point Peter had taken your hand and was gently rubbing circles into it and you both were talking about absolutely anything, but mostly about all the new colors when a nurse walked in. 

“Excuse me, your parents are here. Shall I send them in?”

Peter’s eyes widened as you turned to look at him with a smirk.

“Ready to meet my parents?”

Fuck. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tagging some people who will hopefully like this: @soft-petey​ @quaksvn @itslokes @tommysparker @greenorangevioletgrass @lxilahm @holland-mendes-always-forever @thespydersargon @angel-spidey @angel-holland @th0ttie4tommy @tonguetiedholland @follow-tom-holland-is-spiderman @tcny-stcrks @spideyyeet​ @spider-starry​ @bitchass-slytheriny-snake​ @dreamofaprilsblog

(Redid the tags cuz apparently they didn’t work)

If you want to be added to my taglist or removed just comment and I’d be happy to do so <3

[comfy-whumpee]

NaNo 3

Dear diary.

I wasn’t going to start it this way, but then, I was thinking about it. It’s the 1st November. On this day three years ago, Kala Malik and I walked out of the hellhole he kept us in. She went to hospital. I went to therapy. We bought a place with my parents’ money and rebuilt our lives.

I thought today would be a day of reflection. Instead it’s an absolute disaster.

Right now, Lauritz Nielson is tied up in our attic. Kala is beating the snot out of him, I think. She broke his nose. She’ll do worse if I don’t stop her, but I don’t know that I should.

He never had any comeuppance for what he did and we both want it. But there’s something else going on, and it’s strange. Very strange.

-

Her fists were aching, her back was sore from being bent over him, and honestly, she felt a little sick. There was blood coming out of his nose, his mouth, and his cheeks. Something near his eye was swelling at it made him look deformed. She had done that.

She’d always promised herself that she would. If she saw him again, she would take him down and wouldn’t give him a chance to fight back. He deserved it, and she had earned it. She could finally get a win on him, the win she’d failed to get three years ago.

But this didn’t feel good. He stared up at her and didn’t fight. He didn’t turn away from the blows. There was nothing defensive even in his body language.

His eyes weren’t hard and angry and cold. They were scared, pained, simple emotions except for the deep confusion that had sat in them since she’d opened the door.

Fucking liar. She hit him again, down on the shoulder. Pain flinched over his expression, but nothing else. No anger.

She was tired and out of breath and her skin was hot and itchy. She stood suddenly, pulling away from him, backing up across the room without caring for the splinters the floor was digging into her bare feet. Her hair was stuck to her forehead and the back of her neck. She needed a shower, and a lie down, and a fucking drink.

-

He claims total amnesia. I’m not sure such a thing even exists. He says he woke up in a car park and came to us because the address was the only thing he could remember. How can that be true? It’s way too convenient.

But he isn’t fighting us, isn’t saying all of the usual things he said. He just watches us like we’re going to explain the world to him. He doesn’t resist when we tie him up, criticise him, hit him even, he just... He just takes it. Like he knows he deserves it.

That’s my theory. He hasn’t got amnesia. He’s just on a twisted journey for forgiveness from us.

-

Kala scratched her cheek, where the skin was raised and hardened in a slapdash cross. Of course it would itch on a day like today.

“You gave me this scar,” she said, to the bloodied man on the floor at her feet. “Do you remember? You—”

He was already shaking his head.

“Shut up and listen, then. You had this knife, you pulled it on me whenever I mouthed off at you. I told you to get the fuck off my friend and you turned on me. Two hits across the face, and then you cut. Said every time I swore at you, you’d do it again.”

There was no memory on his expression. Not a flicker. This was such bullshit.

“I did it once more, straight after. Second cut. Hurt like a motherfucker.”

“I’m... sorry,” he said softly.

Anger surged back up to fill the gaps in her composure. “Fuck you!”

She began kicking him again.

-

Kala won’t believe anything like that. She’s scared of him the same as I am, but she’s strong now. She loves how strong she is now. She got strong for me, and now she’s using that strength.

He hasn’t admitted to the lie, though. I might have to think of another way to get him to tell the truth with us. There must be something we can do, to put the screws on him.

Torture doesn’t really work, for getting information. I need to think.

Maybe a trap? Something that he would do while he thought we weren’t looking, something that would prove he knows what he is. Or maybe if I can’t go that far, then at least something that can show us what he really thinks and really wants...

-

Fuck this. It felt bad. He wasn’t cracking. Her body was sore and tired.

Kala stomped down the ladder without another word. She went straight into the bathroom, peeling off her clothes and climbing into the shower while it was still on full blast cold. She felt like screaming into the tiles, but that would disturb Rain, so she punched them instead. The outside wall, though. No sound.

They cracked against her knuckles and pain screeched through the bones. But what else was fucking new?

The shower warmed slowly, and the felt the old pains start to settle. Her shoulders and her knees eased out some of the tension they always carried. She breathed in the steam around her, and smelt the leftover traces of Rain’s lavender and chamomile bath salts.

She splashed her face and tipped her head into the stream, feeling it run through her hair. The white noise buried all other sound. God, it felt good. She’d never forget the first shower she’d had, after they’d escaped Lauritz.

But escaping Lauritz wasn’t so easy when he came to you begging for help like some fucking con artist. He couldn’t let them live, could he? He had to try out fucking mind games.

Not this time. This time, Kala would win. She’d keep him beaten down, and she’d protect Rain, the way she had failed to protect them before. She wouldn’t falter. She wouldn’t fail.

Even if she had to stain her own hands black and blue to do it.

[3pirouette]

Fic: An Experimental Design (2/4ish?)

Title: An Experimental Design

Part 2 of The Pain Scale Series

By: TriplePirouette/3Pirouette

Disclaimer: They're not mine.

Distribution: AO3  Anyone else please ask first :) 

Story Summary: Sequel to “What Number?”, also prompted from Steggy Bingo Bash Prompts.  Takes place about a week after that fic. 

Chapter 2: Crashing Reality

A/N: It feels like cheating, but I’m using the Steggy Bingo Prompt “Comfort” for this chapter. Also, by an overwhelming 2 votes on Tumblr, you asked for it: porn AND plot. This sort of fits that. First few paragraphs overlap, time wise, with the end of the last chapter.

~*~

The feeling in the air was electric, raw. He could feel it sparking through his suit, raising the hairs on his arms. His heart was pounding in his chest, beating harder than he could ever remember it. Perhaps he was simply keyed up, knowing she was waiting for him, needing him, but he knew, deep down, it was something more.

It was barely a second that he paused at the door, making sure it was closed behind him, but it might as well have been hours. He could feel her pain, feel her need and desire for him from across the room like a palpable heaviness to the air. He looked up, found her trembling on her knees on the bed, draped only in a barely tied hospital gown, hair wild and eyes wide.

Her hand was shaking with the effort to stay where she was, her thighs quaking from holding herself up. She licked her lips, and he was done.

Without a word he was moving, long, heavy steps as he tossed his cowl aside and unzipped his jacket. His chest was finally bare when he caught her as she leapt into his arms from the bed. Peggy pressed her body to his, the moan of relief that came from her lips positively lurid as she finally, finally found some relief from the pain.

Steve held her close with one hand and worked unsuccessfully at tearing the hospital gown away with the other, struggling to keep as much of them pressed together as he could. “I’m sorry,” he murmured over and over, nuzzling against her.

“You’re…” her voice was hoarse and she had to stop and swallow, take a deep breath and try again. “You’re here now. That’s what matters.”

“I’m sorry I’m late. It was worse than we imagined. And I’m dirty, I’m disgusting. I’m sorry, Peggy, We’ve been walking—”

She kissed him, forcing him to stop talking as she pressed her lips to his. She pulled away, sliding her face to the side of his, keeping their cheeks pressed tight. “I was worried, but you’re here now and that’s all that matters.”

He moved them to the bed, stopping when it hit his knees. He laid her on it gently, and her whimper of pain when he pulled away broke his heart. “Strip,” he ordered, his hands moving to his own belt. She was able to devest herself of the flimsy cloth quickly, and stripped her panties off without thought.

“How bad?” he asked as he bent down, untying his boots. He wasn’t surprised to feel her cold hands on his back; he arched up to let her press more of her body into him. He was unsure sure if it was tears of relief or pain he saw in her eyes when he looked up, but the fact that she wouldn’t answer him, or couldn’t, told him all he needed to know.

~*~

“I’ll tell you everything you need to know,” Dugan started, seated across from Phillips. Dugan’s voice was even as he recounted finding the nunnery to be a front for a Hydra base and how their intel had been a trap all along.

Howard, for his part, didn’t care about a nunnery. He paced in the back of the room, Dugan and Jones taking turns as they talked Phillips through the events of the last thirty or so hours.

Howard was more concerned with whatever the hell was going on between Steve and Peggy. With each pass of the room, he tried to put together what he knew, but it made little, if any sense to him.

He didn’t like it when he couldn’t figure out a problem, and this was a problem of the highest order.

Peggy was in horrible pain that didn’t respond to heavy doses of medication. The only thing that seemed to take away that pain was skin to skin contact with Steve. Peggy’s pain got worse the longer she didn’t have skin contact with Steve. He shuddered as he thought about the fact that there was some kind of sexual component to all of this. Howard knew the man didn’t want to do much more than declare his intentions for Peggy while the war was on, they’d talked about it once not too long after he’d explained to the poor boy what fondue meant.

Howard had never met a man more in touch with or surer of his moral compass. If something was forcing Steve against that compass, it was big and scary and threatening to Peggy. That was the only thing he could believe would make Steve go against his plans to be respectful and chaste during this war.

Dugan yammered on, Philips hanging on his every word as he made notes. Howard couldn’t put the pieces together, couldn’t find the through line that made sense.

“Stark,” Phillips barked out, “Stop pacing. You’re making me seasick.”

It had to be a side effect of something, had to be working wrong for her to be in that much pain, he figured, ruffling his hair and trying to still himself against the wall.

~*~

“We’re talking to Howard,” Steve whispered, holding her close. She was still trembling in his arms, the two of them tangled together. Steve was glad he’d kept his boxer shorts on, had he not, he might have lost control and taken her ask she kept begging him to. As it was, the bed had creaked perilously under them as they’d crashed together, relishing every inch skin as she moaned and writhed in his arms, the pain melting to passion with each touch until she fell apart in his embrace. His own shorts were soiled, though he’d gotten over him embarrassment of that weeks ago.  

“I collapsed in a briefing,” she whispered into his throat, lips gliding over the skin, “and you just ignored a commanding officer’s order to fraternize with me, to put it lightly. We’re both getting sacked.” She clutched at him like she had that first night, afraid to let go, afraid to feel the pain surge through her again. “The MPs will be showing up any moment, I’m sure,” her voice was tinged with sadness and fear, the loss real for her already.

Steve took a deep breath, taking his time and letting his hand smooth through her hair, the number of tangles against his fingers telling him so much about how long she’d been out of control. “They need us.”

Peggy laughed, a bark of disbelief and surprise. “Like a hole in the head, I’m sure.” She sighed as he pulled the scratchy hospital blanket up over their bodies, “At least I’m sure that’s what Phillips would say.”

He kissed her forehead slowly. “I don’t know what’s going to happen, Peg, but we have to get you help.”

She nodded against him, yawning. “Yes, please.”

~*~

Howard circled the room, sitting on the edge of the Colonel’s desk quickly as the topic switched quickly. “Tell me everything you know.”

Phillips looked at the man with barely contained frustration. “Ass off my desk, Stark.”

Jones and Dugan tried not to laugh as the man scrambled to stand again with no chairs left in the room. Dugan swallowed down his mirth and looked cautiously between the two men. “Colonel, I don’t know much…”

Phillips nodded. “Anything you know would be appreciated, though we will have a discussion about why it was left off the official record, son.”

Dugan nodded before looking at Jones then back at Stark before finally resting his gaze on Phillips. “See, everything that was in my report and the sitrep was true. I grabbed Morita and ran, Cap went back in looking for Peggy. All the recon we had said it would be a quick in and out, I didn’t think to say anything about it because it was a sound tactical decision.” Phillips nodded, Dugan’s eyes bouncing nervously from Stark to the Colonel. “It was when I found them that we started leaving things out. I said she was weak, but in truth…”

Dugan’s eyes glazed over, his mind far away. “She was in pain. A lot of pain, and I couldn’t see anything that would explain it. Cap carried her back to camp and the sounds she was making…” he shook his head.

Jones took over, “We all offered to break camp, but the Captain refused, said she needed rest.” He looked down at his hands, a blush creeping up his neck. “They weren’t… they didn’t rest.”

“I’m asking this because I need to know, men,” Phillips started, his lips pressed tight together. “Did Rogers force himself on—”

Howard was shocked. Jones’ head popped up, his expression and his lips denying it. Dugan was so affronted he stood, tossing his helmet on the ground at his feet as he loudly objected.

Phillips held up his hands to stop the cacophony the two men made. “I had to ask, you know that.”

“Jesus, Phillips,” Howard stepped back, folding his arms tightly. “As if that man was capable of that.”

Dugan, still affronted, sat slowly, the displeasure clear on his face. “It was just the opposite. Steve put her down to get her some water and she screamed like she’d been burned. Soon as he stopped touching her, she was in agony.” He shook his head. “Next morning, she walked out of that tent like nothing had ever happened, same old Peggy.”

“Was the damndest thing,” Jones said, eyes widening as he remembered. “Not a whimper, not a limp, nothing. She said she felt fine, and there was no reason to believe otherwise.”

Howard shook his head accusing both men. “And no one thought to say anything? She was in that much pain and no one said a word?”

Dugan and Jones sat, stone-faced and silent, against Howard’s accusations.

At their silence, Howard turned to Phillips. “We have to pull them both. I have to figure out what’s going on.”

Dugan started to object, “You can’t—”

Phillips silenced him, standing. “I can’t? Oh yes, I very well can and will.” He pointed at the door, leaning over. “You and those two idiots keeping this secret might have cost Agent Carter her life. What if this hadn’t been days but weeks? What if we shipped them out and hadn’t known? What if there are repercussions for Rogers we don’t know about yet that show up in the middle of a fire fight, huh? You got a good answer for that?”

“No, sir,” Dugan and Jones both parroted.

“’No, sir’ is damn right,” Phillips sat back down, eyebrows knitting together. “Damned fools, all of you.” He looked down as he folded his hands together. “They’re off active duty as of this minute, the both of them. Stark, they’re all yours.” He looked up at the man, serious. “Fix it.”

Howard nodded, knowing it was a serious order.

Phillips turned back to Dugan and Jones. “You two are going to help. As soon as those clowns are done doing whatever it is they’re doing in there, you’re taking whoever you need back to that base and getting any and all information you can by whatever means necessary. You understand me?”

Dugan and Jones nodded, standing and saluting. “Yes, sir.”

~*~

Steve dressed quietly as Peggy lay tucked up in the hospital bed, sleeping deeply.

He had questions, and was prepared to get down on his knees to beg for the help he knew Peggy needed when Phillips inevitably dishonorably discharged him.

He looked back at her, her hair still tangled, a smudge of dirt on her cheek where he’d touched her, the dirt of the firefight and a day marching still covering him. He felt like he was tainting her, despite how much she needed him.

Deep inside, he knew he needed her, too. He knew he could feel her now like he’d never felt her before, knew when she was close, could almost feel a fuzzy version of the pain she felt burning through her until he touched her. He was different, too, and that was every bit as concerning to him as her pain was.

He opened the door and slipped out, prepared to fight for them.

[megalony]

She’s a good girl- Part 2

This is my new murderer! Ben Hardy series I’m working on, thank you for the lovely feedback on the first part I hope you all enjoy this part (two posts in one day!).

Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @rogmeddows @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez @jonesyaddiction @ambi-and-sunflowers @milanosaurus @httpfandxms @saint-hardy @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @peterquillzsblog @im-an-adult-ish @crazylittlethingg​

Series taglist: @onceuponadetectivedemigod​

Series masterlist

Summary: (Y/n) is a good girl from a church-going family and her brother, Joe is trying to put Ben behind bars. But when (Y/n) starts to fall for the dangerous killer, things get complicated.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Why didn't you wear your dress? You always wear the blue one on Sundays." Linda's voice sent shivers running down (Y/n)'s spine and the papers in her hands started to become crinkled at the sides from how tightly her fingers were pressing into them and she was sure her fingerprints would soon become visible.

The comment made (Y/n)'s eyes dart down to look at her attire for today's sermon, wondering what was so wrong with what she was wearing. She had chosen a pair of dark navy blue leggings, a checkered blue and white shirt that tied into a bow at the bottom front and she had a black cardigan to go with it.

(Y/n) never really got to choose what she wore to church, even when her mother made it seem like a choice, it really wasn't. Linda advised (Y/n) what to wear, said a dress was appropriate and once she wore the blue one Linda just persuaded (Y/n) to call it her Sunday dress and for her to wear it every weekend without fail.

But (Y/n) didn't want to wear a dress that both made her seem innocent and sweet yet a young, timid little girl. She wanted to choose what she wanted to wear and she wanted to wear things that were nice and looked good. (Y/n) wanted to look like she was actually eighteen and not twelve or fourteen, she didn't want to be seen as a childish little girl who had to be protected.

Deep down, she knew the reason she had chosen to wear something different also had something to do with what happened last Sunday. When she met Ben. If by chance, he happened to walk past at the end of sermon today, (Y/n) wanted to be wearing something that made her feel more confident and look her age. She didn't want Ben to see her as a little girl, even if she shouldn't be thinking so much about how a murderer looked at her.

She had gone for a walk with him on Monday and then on Thursday he had taken her for a drive in his car. Each time, (Y/n) had to lie to her parents and say she was going out with a friend from college and both times she had been told off for going without asking first. But it just felt so good to get away from everything and not have to worry about what time she went home or who she was out with. She could be herself around someone she really shouldn't feel comfortable with.

"I thought I'd wear something different." (Y/n) smoothed down her top out of nervous habit. Whenever she wore something her mother or father didn't approve of, she ended up rethinking it and changing into something they liked. It was too late for that today.

"You should have gone with the dress, you should look respectable at church-"

"Mother please, there's nothing wrong with what I'm wearing." (Y/n) would have thought the dress was worse considering it showed her legs from the knee down whereas what she was wearing today only showed her arms.

(Y/n) reached for the last piece of paper discarded in the front row before she placed them down on the table at the alter. It was only a small list of hymns they had sung today and the topic of her father's speech. A small smile of relief flooded her face when her father came out of the vestry. He wasn't changed yet which meant they weren't leaving for a while, it gave (Y/n) time to get outside and watch with hopeful eyes for Ben passing by.

"I'm going to wait outside." (Y/n) spoke to her father rather than her mother, knowing he would be more understanding, even if he normally was just as strict as his wife.

Hooking her bag onto her shoulder, (Y/n) slowly walked down the aisle and out of the open wooden doors that were heavy and creaked and groaned when they were opened or closed.

The bright sunlight hit her eyes and make it momentarily hard to see but when a hand rested on her elbow she jumped. Her heart fluttered in her chest but soon started to calm down when she saw that it was only Joe. This had been the first time in two months that Joe was finally able to make it to a Sunday sermon and their mother had been mightily impressed and over the moon that he was here. Their whole family sitting in the front left row watching their father give one of the same old speeches that enamoured everyone but (Y/n) whose thoughts had been somewhere else entirely.

"Dad really knows how to calm the mind, huh?"

Joe stuffed his hands into his pockets and moved so they were standing to the left of the doors, out of the way up beside the old bricks of the church. Something about Sundays always made Joe calm, he loved sitting and listening to their father preach, it was like listening to whale music when trying to sleep. It calmed Joe down immensely and eased his mind, especially when he was working on a case.

"Is your mind usually erratic?" (Y/n) countered with a grin, leaning her shoulders back against the wall but her eyes couldn't help but scout around. She wanted to see Ben walking past or notice his car parked over the road, she wanted to see his cheeky grin or his lips wrapped around a cigarette. (Y/n) wanted to run her fingers through his hair or reach out for his hand, she wanted to lean her head on his shoulder as they walked down the street like she had been so desperate to do on Monday.

"It is when I've got a killer running laps round my mind. The bastard's beaten up one of his own men and put him in hospital and the guy won't testify. Won't say a bad word against him."

Joe tipped his head back against the bricks, stomping his foot to the ground in a way that reminded (Y/n) of an angrily child who didn't get what they wanted. Joe either didn't see the grimace on (Y/n)'s face or if he did, he put it down to talk of a murderer when in fact, it made her uncomfortable to even think about Ben as a killer.

She had been around him a few times now and every time he was as sweet as sugar with her. He smiled, he laughed and he tried to coax her to talk and was always a gentleman around her. He never made fun of her or was rude to her in any way, he didn't step over the line when he was out with her or push her too far or showed any bad side when he was in her presence. (Y/n) just couldn't see how Ben was the killer Joe made him out to be when he was so kind around her.

"How do you propose to catch this killer, then?" (Y/n) forced a smile as she looked over at Joe.

"I need the evidence, gotta wait for him to slip up and watch him until he gives me something useful."

As if by magic, something caught the corner of (Y/n)'s eye and when she glanced over, she could see the familiar frame walking slowly up the street with his eyes set on the church like it was a beacon to him. He had come to see her, there was no other reason for him to be up this way at this time unless he wanted to see (Y/n).

"Hopefully it won't take you too long." (Y/n) nodded at her brother, a nervous smile playing on her lips before she pushed herself off the bricks and walked over the short cut grass. She knew Joe would presume she was just going to sit on the wall and wait for their parents to be ready to go home, like always.

(Y/n) perched herself down on the wall beside the willow tree just like last week, except this time, there was no fear or surprise in her eyes as she watched Ben walking closer to her. There was a half-finished cigarette pressed between his lips and he had a plain white shirt on, black trousers and a black beanie which kind of conflicted the look but still looked socially acceptable.

Ben seemed to have noticed Joe straight away because he kept his head turned and didn't look over in Joe's direction once, he was drifting by like a whisper in the wind.

(Y/n) tried hard to stop herself from smiling too widely when Ben's eyes landed on her but he wasn't slowing down his pace. A surge of panic started to beat through her veins with her blood as she wondered if he was going to walk right past her. Maybe he didn't want anything to do with her anymore? What if he had seen Joe and thought (Y/n) was definitely spying on him for her brother? What if he was just teasing her all along and she had fallen for it hook, right and sinker?

Every question imaginable raced through her head but they were all diminished when Ben's hand reached out and took hers that was resting on her lap. He locked his fingers expertly with hers and carried on walking, gently tugging her with him until she hopped off the wall and started walking down the path with him. Ben kept a quick pace to ensure that Joe wouldn't see (Y/n) walking off with a stranger, to then realise who the stranger was.

"Hello." (Y/n) smiled up at Ben when they were round the side of the church and out of sight of everyone who would see and snitch back to her parents. Her head tilted up to look at Ben who smiled down at her around the cigarette.

"Hello." Ben's voice was almost enamouring and addictive and when (Y/n) noticed the way he was biting the end of the cigarette it sent sparks running through her stomach.

(Y/n) thought that when they were out the way of the church, Ben would have let go of her hand since he would have no need to make sure she hurried alongside him. But he kept her hand tightly against his own, rubbing circles on the side of her hand with his thumb like he was silently telling her something or trying to calm her down.

"What happened to the dress?"

Ben removed the cigarette from his lips, offering it to (Y/n) before stubbing it between his shoe when she kindly declined. When Ben noticed the way (Y/n) looked herself over without a smile, his head ticked to the side and he bit down on his lower lip. She was a puzzle to him that he wanted to work out and fit into place. He wanted to see the bigger picture with (Y/n) but he didn't know why. He had no idea why he talked to her last weekend when he first saw her.

Maybe it was because she seemed so shocked but not scared when she saw him and knew who he was. Maybe it was because there was an aura about her that was intoxicating to him, maybe talking to her stirred something inside Ben that he hadn't felt in a while. Whatever the reason, Ben couldn't seem to walk away from her and she didn't want him to either.

"I, um... I thought I'd wear something different."

"Suits you... although I'd like to think that you dressed up for me, and not for your prayers to the man upstairs." Ben spoke against the shell of (Y/n)'s ear causing her heart to jump up into her throat and constrict her breathing. Was it so clear that she wanted to look different when she was around him? That she wanted to look like more of a grown up and more like herself than the little shy doll her parents always tried to dress up. 

Ben's temple leaned against her own as they continued walking and for one split second, (Y/n) wondered if he was going to kiss her. He certainly looked like the thought had crossed his mind and that it was something he was debating, but then he seemed to think better of it and settled for a sharp but still gentle smile her way.

"Where are we going?" It took a lot for (Y/n) to keep her voice level as she realised didn't quite know if Ben had somewhere in mind or if they were just going on an aimless walk like they had done on Monday. Either was fine with her but she wanted to know if Ben had some sort of idea, he normally seemed to know exactly what he wanted to do.

"Would it be acceptable for me to steal you away from Sunday lunch for a bit? I'd like you to myself for a while."

It felt like rockets had been set off in (Y/n)'s chest when those words registered in her mind. There were hundreds of connotations and meanings behind what he just said but (Y/n) knew there was nothing creepy or dirty or weird behind them. Yet it still made her heart flip in her chest and when he pulled her closer into his side her legs almost gave way.

There was no way this man was the murderer Joe was after.

Last time they were out walking together, there had been a small membrane of space between them like a barrier neither of them were willing to cross in fear of what they would be faced with. But Ben had broken that barrier this time around because he was holding her hand and keeping (Y/n) tucked into his side like he was making sure he kept her safe.

Taking a daring risk, (Y/n) looked up at Ben before she leaned her head on his arm. She could feel his eyes on her as she did so but he didn't say anything about it, they just kept on walking.

(Y/n) didn't know how long they had been walking for, it felt like they had been drifting around for hours before she noticed Ben was slowing down until they were practically non-moving. When she leaned to see what had caught his eye, (Y/n) noticed that it was a building. It was a two-story building that was formed into an odd shape with extensions on the side, an unfinished building round the back and a car park at the side.

"Is that your gym?"

"Yeah."

There were no cars in the car park and the doors looked like they were locked, (Y/n) figured it was either normally closed on Sundays or Ben didn't like it open when he wasn't there to run it. She knew he actually owned the club, he wasn't a manager or leasing the place.

"What's it like, running a business?" (Y/n) didn't know where the question came from but it surprised both of them. Her chin moved to press into Ben's arm so she could look up at him as they continued walking down the street. She knew it must be satisfying to actually own the business, he controlled what happened, who worked for him, anyone he didn't like he could fire. He had the responsibilities of making rotas for workers and giving wages and memberships and it was clear Ben exercised a lot in the gym and did boxing himself.

"It's good, I like being in control of everything, and being the boss means people work for you, they don't work against you or piss around and if they take things for granted, I can fire them. What about you, doll, do you have a job?"

When (Y/n) read Ben's file that Joe left lying around, it was very clear that he was a control freak. He hurt people who went against him, he had beaten up one of his own men by what Joe said today and his men were either so afraid of him or too loyal to speak out. That meant they must have some shred of respect for Ben. He seemed like the kind of man who would be aiming for the top job so he was on top of the pyramid. People being higher up than him wouldn't seem to sit very well with Ben, he had to have the control and be in charge, he needed to make the decisions.

"No, mother wanted me to finish school first. I did get a job in the corner shop for the summer but I didn't like it much... my dad likes me to help him out at church."

Linda thought it was more appropriate if (Y/n) finished school before getting a job and she wanted (Y/n) to have a proper job, one she could boast about to her friends like how Joe was a police officer or Cora now had an apprenticeship in the firm her boyfriend worked at. (Y/n) was expected to follow with a good job like that.

She worked at the corner shop for some money during the summer but it had been too boring for her to handle, seeing the same people everyday, not being able to talk to them for long. She wasn't even allowed to use the cash register she was mainly stocking shelves. It was okay for the summer but she really couldn't do that for the rest of her life.

"The church?"

"Oh, my father is the Reverend of the church."

"Ah, so that's why you reserve Sunday morning for the man upstairs." Ben smiled when he caught sight of the gold cross hanging around (Y/n)'s neck. It was slightly hidden behind her shirt but he remembered seeing it the first time he saw her. The cross hung proudly over the top of her blue dress.

"My father does the sermon's every Sunday, I help out with events like fairs and get things ready for christenings and such. We go to church in the evening on Christmas too. I take it you're not religious?"

"No, too many inconsistencies for me to believe but I've got no problem with anyone else's beliefs. Besides, if God is real I think I'd be in real shit by now, too many sins to count." Ben watched (Y/n) bite the inside of her cheek to stop herself from laughing as she knew he was probably right, God would have something to say about the way Ben was conducting his life. "Doll, since your faith clearly allows you to walk around with a murderer, do you think you could swing something else by the man upstairs?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do you think you'd like to come and work for me?"

Ben's words took (Y/n) by surprise, so much so that she stopped walking and turned so she was properly facing him. He was offering her a job, not a boring job stacking shelves but something interesting, something where she would be in a gym and a boxing club with a mix of criminals like Ben and normal avid gym-goers who knew nothing about the man who owned the place.

Joe did seem to think something else was going on at the club, maybe a job there wouldn't be such a good idea. But then again, (Y/n) was going around with Ben who she knew was a murderer and he didn't seem to have any bad intentions towards her. He was offering her a job and he owned the club so he wouldn't give her a horrid job or something she would be uncomfortable with. But he felt he had to make sure she would feel okay working for him when they both knew he wasn't a saint.

"What would I do?"

"Anything you like. You could be on front at reception, letting people in and out, you could work backstage with me sorting out wages and the files, you could check the equipment and order the stock if you like. Whatever you want to do is fine by me."

Ben was offering (Y/n) something she had been so desperate for, but he had no reason to. He wasn't obliged to give her a job or feel sorry for her or try and gain something out of her. Yet here he was, saying he would give her a job doing whatever she wanted in his own establishment without wanting something from her in return, he had nothing to gain from this.

"Why would you do that for me?"

(Y/n) felt like she couldn't breathe for what seemed like the hundredth time since she started this walk with Ben when he circled his arms around her waist and dragged her closer until her chest hit his. He tipped his head back like he was really thinking about his answer before he leaned down until his face was level with his own. Something about the way that he seemed to stoop down so they were level made (Y/n) smile, it was like he was giving her some sense of power when she was around him instead of hogging it all for himself.

"You want a job, I can give you one and it benefits me to have your lovely face wandering round my club. I'd get to see a lot more of you."

"You want to see more of me?" (Y/n) breathed heavily through the words that came out very quiet. She couldn't believe someone like Ben would be interested in someone like her, it felt too unrealistic, too different like he was stringing her along, but he wasn't. He was genuine and it stunned her to know he wanted to be around her.

"I know you know what I do and it isn't good. That brother of yours also thinks he can put me away, but you've overlooked that so far to be around me. I'd like to think that you'll say yes if I ask you to hang around me a lot more and be my girl.”

(Y/n) couldn't find any words to respond, all she could do was smile and breathe like she was about to faint.

Ben wanted to go out with her, he wanted to give her a job to make her happy and so he could see her a lot more without having to go for walks and stay out of sight of Joe or her family. Ben actually wanted to be with her after not knowing her for very long at all. He seemed as enticed with her as she was with him.

"I'll take that smile as a yes, shall I?"

The moment (Y/n) nodded, Ben grinned wickedly like the cat that got the cream before he leaned forward until his lips were pressed to hers. Ben knew from the way he'd kissed her neck on their first meeting that she'd never been kissed before so he hoped she didn't mind him stealing her first kiss like this. His hands dug into the flesh around her hips as he felt her hands moving to his neck like she didn't know what to do with her hands but she knew she had to do something.

His lips felt so warm and smooth against her own, (Y/n) could feel each ridge and crease in his lips and likewise, Ben could feel the bumps of skin where (Y/n) had bitten down too hard on her lower lip and pulled a layer of skin off.

A shiver ran down (Y/n)'s spine and her hands pressed firmer against Ben's neck when lips parted and his tongue darted out over her lower lip. But he didn't dart his tongue into her mouth to battle against her own, he bit down on her lower lip instead and slowly pulled back, pulling her lip before eventually letting go.

How could being with Ben be so wrong, when it felt so right?

[heartlessgirls]

Worthless Heart

Warning sex and gore.

A dick girl was lying in a hospital bed she lived for several years. She had a weak heart although the day her heart started failing was the worst because the scared look on her little sister’s face as she saw her big sister clutch her own chest feeling her heart fail. She had numerous surgeries. She was so used to it she has seen her own heart bleed during surgery since she can endure the pain. She has even seen it stop and with so many times being near death she lasts longer than others when her heart stopped. One time her chest became open when talking to her sister lying in bed. She hated to see her heart’s blood on her little sister’s face. One time her cock cummed at seeing her grown up younger sister became such a beauty during surgery, The cum landed on her heart and in fact her heart became stronger so the surgeons kept her body expose to raise her weak heartbeat. If her cock cums from seeing her sister she thinks it should die. She never intended her sister to see that part of her, she was hoping to gain muscles to be strong enough to protect her sister but she grew in height and chest size but nothing else her heart is still weak. It has been hard on her sister at one point her sister wanted to remove her own heart feeling bad after she accidentally head butted her big sister’s chest after she said to her younger sister her heart beats with more joy when she is hugging her sister on the day her heart started failing. The doctor confirms she did not cause it. The only reason her younger sister did not remove her own heart is her big sister told her she could damage it and it would not save her. She knew her younger sister even as an adult would not hesitate to end her life for her big sister’s sake. However she convinced her any death would damage it preventing her from giving her big sister her heart. The dick girl hated her own heart with what it put her little sister through. The dick girl would crush and destroy it if she was not so weak. How she wished her own heart to die. There seemed to be an electrical surge on this stormy night but nobody came in to check on her, well the dick girl was ok with them leaving her to die. The door open and she saw a familiar busty beauty carrying a bag. She was naked but she had animalistic ears and a tail that both glowed with electrical energy. She recognized her as her little sister but transformed. She said sister is that you? She replied do not worry big sis I will save you no matter what. Her eyes glowed blue. Normally her big sister would be scared but she did not value her life that burdened her sister. If her sister wanted to rip out her big sister’s heart she would let her. She would do it herself even if her little sister wanted to use it as a sex toy her heart only belongs to her little sister as useless as that barely beating organ is. Her younger sister straddled her cock and was riding her. She said little sis what are you doing? Her little sister said saving you. The dick girl said honestly it is wasted effort I will die. The little sister said no I will have your heart beating. The dick girl said you can rip it out I do not mind I would be happy if you kill me since you will be the last thing I see. The little sister said I will help you I love you. The dick girl said my heart is beating better. The little sister said I am glad I got these dark powers. The dick girl said wait if the price is your soul to suffer for eternity I offer mine instead please leave my sister alone. The younger sister said no I just get horny, now let me fix you. The younger sister did many things. She placed her hand on her big sister’s chest and filled it with energy that became a hand. The dick girl thought her heart would be crushed but instead it was massaged. When her younger sister filled her big sister’s chest with electricity she thought her younger sister was cooking her beating heart alive not gaining a good rhythm which it did. Next the younger sister pierced her older sister’s chest with these long strange needles. She was used with having sharp things enter her heart so her heart being stabbed was nothing new or to be afraid of. However these needles did not cause blood to come out and the dick girls heart felt really good without pain. The younger sister said do you trust me. The duck girl replied with my life. The younger sister opened her older sister’s chest and they saw the heart being massaged by energy, being electrocuted, and being pierced by needles. The younger sister said it is as beautiful as ever since I kissed it. The dick girl said when did you kiss it? The younger sister admitted that she did that’s when her older sister’s stitches opened up and that is why she had blood on her face that day, she said I am sorry it felt like a story book moment when a kiss fixes a curse. The dick girl said you loving my heart makes me happy. The younger sister said ok now I must take it. The dick girl said it has always been yours. She ripped her older sister’s heart out. The dick girl sat up and hugged her and said of course you want to rip it while it is strong. Well I hope you like it thank you for freeing me from it. The younger sister said you will not die. Without hesitation she magically took out her own heart. Both of them had something to say despite so much sin and immorality they committed that had to say something to each other as people. They looked each other in the eye and even without hearts they spoke the truth. They said I love you and they kissed. Their hearts floated up and joined each other before a bright explosion was created from their joined hearts. The next year they were sitting on a couch hugging. The dick girl had the muscles she always wanted so she was naked as her younger sister is. Her younger sister just wanted to be with her older sister and they both got what they wanted most. Both of their parents accepted their relationship since they were scared of losing their only children and were genuinely happy for them. As they were together the two sisters’ hearts beat in synch. The dick girl and her sister could regrow their hearts and they could never die so they gave each other an extra heart. The dick girl had her sister’s heart right next to her own heart so it will never be alone and it will always beat strongly. Her younger sister had her sister’s heart beating in her womb so it will satisfy her whenever she wanted since her older sister always wanted to be there for her. After so long they got their hearts’ greatest desire. For their heart to belong to their sister.

[twomanyideas]

The Search for the Supreme Scent - Chapter 4 (Final)

Fanart used with permission from @x-thekid​. Once again, please take a moment to let her know how much you liked it. You can see her post here!

A collaboration by @mdelpin and @oryu404 with @x-thekid​

This chapter is the one that touches on what is happening in the art. We had a lot of fun writing it. We hope you enjoy it!

AO3 | Ch 1 | Prev: Ch 3 

Chapter 4

The first thing Natsu registered when he came to was the heavy perfume of the flowers, immediately followed by a sharp pain in his chest as he inhaled it. He hissed, rolling over carefully so he could look around. He found himself in a green, grassy field, sheltered from the sun by the shade of a large tree, and surrounded by the very flowers they’d come to collect.

Gray sat next to him, leaning against the tree trunk with his arms crossed over his chest. His shirt was nowhere to be found, as usual.

“Wanna tell me what that was about?” he cocked his brow at Natsu.

“What do you mean?” Natsu answered, his voice sounding a bit shaky, “I took them out, didn’t I?”

He wasn’t sure what else to say. That whole thing had been unexpected. Just as it had the previous day with Juvia, he’d felt his control wavering, as if some deeper instinct had surged forward and taken over.

“Yeah, but that was overboard even for you,” Gray pointed out, his eyes never leaving Natsu’s face, “You turned those golems into gravel. Was that Dragon Force? I didn’t think you could do that on command yet.”

“I can’t. I saw you were in danger and-,” Natsu shrugged helplessly, embarrassed by his admission.

“Did you forget Porlyusica lives nearby?” Gray reminded Natsu, making him feel idiotic for overreacting the way he had.

Natsu looked away, not knowing how to respond. He didn’t understand what was happening to him, but one thing he felt sure of, it wouldn’t have made any difference. Even if he had consciously thought about the healer’s proximity, that rage he’d experienced wouldn’t have been satisfied by any other course of action.

“I was trying to protect you, you dimwit. You’re the one who's hurt,” Gray continued, pressing his lips in a slight frown. “Not that that’s ever stopped you from doing something stupid,” he added with an exasperated sigh.

“Yeah, well, we managed to stumble onto the one creature that’s immune to ice, I had to do something.”

“Since we’re here, we should have Porlyusica take a look at you,” Gray suggested, clasping his hands over his head as he took in Natsu’s strained breathing. “you’ve probably made your injuries worse.”

“Hell no!” Natsu immediately protested, sitting up to show he was fine, even though he felt like throwing up just from that. Getting home was going to be a bitch.

Gray’s eyes narrowed as he examined him, “You gotta give me more than that, Pyro. Why would you want to walk home like that when there’s a healer nearby?”

“You mean you weren’t going to carry me?” Natsu feigned a pout.

Gray snorted, “Not likely, maybe if you passed out and looked all pathetic again.”

“You ungrateful bastard,” Natsu tightened his hands into fists in mock anger, “I should have let them turn you into mush.”

“Natsu,” Gray startled him by using his name, “I know things have been weird between us since you got back, but despite what I might have said at Avatar, I’m still your friend. I know when something is bothering you. And sure, we can sit here and trade insults all day, but wouldn’t you rather tell me what’s wrong?”

He’d rather not, but he could tell by the way Gray was looking at him and the serious tone of his voice that he refused to be kept in the dark any longer. The combination was enough for Natsu to cave. He didn’t like keeping secrets from Gray, and if he was honest with himself, he did want to talk about what happened, despite dreading the reaction he was sure to get.

“Wendy needs to be the one who heals me,” he explained, quickly adding, “and I'm not just saying that because I don’t want to see the old hag. After what happened yesterday, well…let’s just say it will help give her closure.”

“Closure?” Gray puzzled, “What are you talking about?”

“If I tell you this, you have to promise not to freak out, or go crying to Erza,” Natsu insisted.

“Yeah yeah, do you need me to do the needle in my eye thing?” Gray rolled his eyes at him, “We’re not kids anymore. I can keep a secret.”

Natsu closed his eyes, preparing himself mentally to go back to that plaza. When he opened them, he could see Gray studying him closely. Feeling his cheeks heating up, he quickly looked away.

“We did a job at Worth Woodsea yesterday, and when we were done training, we stopped to pick some rare mushrooms. Sting had liked them and wanted to take some back to Sabertooth for Minerva.”

“Wendy asked to stop by the Cait Shelter guild building to pay her respects, and we agreed. Everything was quiet, and we just hung around waiting for her, but then a giant monster pack appeared out of nowhere.

“We fought them off easily enough at first, even though we were already tired from training but more and more kept coming. We think it was the mushrooms that attracted them. Anyway, we’d soon run out of potions to help keep us going.” Natsu tried to swallow back the lump that was forming in his throat as the images flashed through his mind once again. “Sting was hit bad, and uhm...well, Rogue died.”

“HE WHAT?!” Gray’s eyes nearly popped out of their sockets, his skin paling from shock.

“He’s at the hospital now, he's going to be okay,” Natsu assured him, “but it was close.”

“He’s going to be okay?!” Gray challenged, “How the hell do you go from dead to okay?”

“Do you remember that book Porlyusica gave Wendy before the Games?”

“Sure, it had spells her dragon left for her, right?”

“Yeah, well, this was one of them. Wendy had learned it, but she’d never used it before. She was determined to give it a try if it could save Rogue, but she was terrified.”

“She’d been fighting alongside us and providing support all afternoon, and that spell- it used up all of her remaining magic,” Natsu turned away, not wanting to see Gray’s disapproval. They were protective of all their teammates, but none more so than Wendy, who was still young.

“She managed to save him, but the monsters wouldn’t let up, and we got pretty beat up in the process. She couldn’t heal us, and you know how she is,” Natsu lifted his shoulder in a half-shrug, “If anyone else does it, it will reinforce what she feels is her failure.”

Natsu attempted what he thought was a reassuring smile, “It’s not so bad. If she could go through all that, I can certainly bear this for a bit longer.”

“You’re full of it, but I get what you’re saying.”

Gray remained silent for a few minutes, eyes blinking slowly until he suddenly peered at Natsu, his brows furrowed in thought, “Wait a minute, how exactly does a pack of monsters manage to get the drop on five dragon slayers?”

Natsu gazed up through the tree branches, trying to catch a glimpse of the sky as he worked himself through what had happened, putting together the situations that individually wouldn’t have been such a huge deal, but together proved to be lethal.

“It was the rain,” he muttered, “it dampened our sense of smell, and it screwed with my magic. Probably made their movements quieter too.”

“What are you talking about?” Gray frowned. “It didn’t rain yesterday.”

“It did in Worth Woodsea,” Natsu countered, “started right as we got to Cait Shelter.”

Gray’s expression once again became thoughtful as he considered Natsu’s words, his hands suddenly balling into fists for no reason Natsu could see.

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Gray roared, “I thought we were done with that nonsense!”

“What are you going on about?” Natsu wondered, unable to make any sense of Gray’s outburst.

“Don’t worry about it, it’s not important,” Gray dismissed his question, but Natsu could tell he was still angry.

Gray drew in a long breath, looking away for a moment before focusing his attention back to Natsu.

“I get that whatever happened yesterday was some kind of a freak occurrence,” he remarked, “but it’s not the first time you’ve come back all beat up from one of these things.”

“Look, I know you want to get stronger, I do too,” Gray’s eyes bored into Natsu with a concern that shook him, “ but the fact is, I don’t trust these guys to have your back.”

Natsu was about to argue the point when Gray followed up with something he hadn’t been expecting.

“That’s something you and I have always done, even back when we were fighting all the time,” Gray reminded him, his mouth twitching into a crooked smile.

And as much as it was in his nature to disagree with most things that came out of Gray’s mouth, Natsu had to admit this time he was right. Even though they bickered and fought often, there had never been a job or brawl where Natsu hadn’t been watching the stripper’s back, and he’d always taken it for granted that Gray did the same.

Regardless, Natsu didn’t think it was fair for Gray to compare their dynamic to the one he shared with the other slayers. The two of them had been training together for years, moving like a well-oiled machine and fighting together flawlessly. In comparison, he’d only known the other slayers for a short time. They were still learning how to work together as a team.

“Gray-”

“Do you remember when we fought at Avatar, and you told me you’d been waiting for me?” Gray interrupted his objection, not saying anything else until Natsu nodded in acknowledgment.

“Well, I couldn’t say it at the time, but I’d been waiting for you too. That whole year you were gone,” Gray confessed, “So much had happened, and I couldn’t really talk about it with anyone else.”

Natsu scanned the field they were sitting in, too nervous to meet Gray's eyes when he continued.

“You’ve always understood me better than anyone, and I had hoped that when you got back well... nevermind that now. The point is there’s no one I trust more. And I know there’s been a few times when I went too far or pushed too hard, but that’s because you’re important to me.”

Natsu's heart was racing. Was Gray going to say what he thought he was going to say? He'd been ready to make the first move himself, gathering up his courage and his thoughts, and trying to form them into sentences that hopefully wouldn't sound completely ridiculous, but now it seemed like Gray was going to beat him to it.

Natsu forced himself to look at Gray, feeling the weight of his gaze, but not able to hold it for long, too flustered by the earnestness that had replaced his friend’s usual scowl. He considered Wendy's advice once again as he looked at the flowers growing around them.

“We make a great team, and that’s why I want to ask you something important.”

For the first time since he’d started talking, Gray sounded unsure, and Natsu looked up to see his friend had curled his fingers around his sword pendant, fidgeting with it as he worked himself up to ask his question.

It only served to feed Natsu’s anticipation and excitement. He looked for the prettiest flower he could find and picked it, determined to give it to Gray as a token of his love. He couldn’t believe this was finally happening!

“Would you be my partner for the S-class exam?”

“Yes, I’d love to!” Natsu answered excitedly, the hand that was holding the flower thrusting out like a piston before Gray’s words had even had a chance to sink in.

“Wait, what did you just ask me?”

Natsu felt the blood rush to his face, and the temperature around him rise as his magic responded to his emotions. He was humiliated, but that was nothing compared to the disappointment he felt at having reached the wrong conclusion.

He should never have listened to the other slayers. Their well-meaning optimism had made him believe that Gray would ask him out or, at the very least, admit to some sort of feelings for him. What a joke that turned out to be.

Natsu realized with growing horror that his arm was still outstretched, offering that stupid flower, which of course, his magic had now set on fire, the tiny flames working away at the once perfect petals.

What had been a beautiful offering now looked utterly wretched, but there was nothing he could do about it. It was his fire. So he hid his face in his scarf as best he could, looking straight ahead and desperately hoping that if he ignored it, Gray would somehow not notice.

“I asked if you wanted to be my partner for the S-Class exam,” Gray repeated, taking in the spectacle that was Natsu with barely a raised eyebrow. “Since we don’t have to compete against each other this time around. I thought we could do it together.”

Gray calmly coated the flower in his ice, putting out the flames and dousing the rest of Natsu’s hopes along with it.

Natsu did his best to act enthused, “Yeah! If we teamed up, there’s no way we could fail!”

He thought he’d done a good job until he noticed Gray studying him intently.

“What did you think I was going to ask?”

“Nothing!” Natsu answered a little too quickly, leaving Gray to frown at him in disbelief. However, in a remarkable turn of events, the stubborn stripper seemed content not to question him any further. “Speaking of teaming up,” Gray changed the subject, “I want in on the slayers’ team. If you thought you could just run off and get stronger without me, you were seriously mistaken.”

“I’d have to bring it up to the others,” Natsu answered honestly, not having any idea how the other slayers would react to having Gray be a part of what they were doing. “It’s not up for discussion,” Gray replied, his jaw set in an arrogant scowl that Natsu was all too familiar with, “It shouldn’t be a problem. In case you’ve already forgotten, I’m a slayer too.”

He gestured towards Natsu’s ribs, “That wouldn’t have happened if I’d been there. Besides, lately, you’re with them all the time. At least this way, we can still get some training in. Not to mention, someone needs to watch out for Wendy.”

Natsu sighed in defeat, wondering how a love confession had turned into this. He watched as Gray got up and began to pick some flowers to fulfill their request and decided to do the same.

“Don’t bother,” Gray called out, much to Natsu’s relief as the little movement he’d managed had been incredibly painful.

That was until the ice mage snickered, “I wouldn’t want to risk another flower upsetting you.”

“That was an accident!” Natsu whined, growing ever more irritated as Gray only laughed harder at his protests.

“It was hilarious,” Gray snorted, his laughs finally ebbing into fond chuckles, “I really did miss you, Flame Brain, it just wasn’t the same without you.”

“I, uh, missed you too,” Natsu replied honestly, watching Gray collect the flowers for Ichiya as he lay back down on the grass to rest for the long walk home. 0-0

Gray wasn’t at all surprised to find he’d been right. Natsu had put too much stress on his healing injuries during the fight, making them even worse. It was easy to tell by the way his breathing turned more shallow with every step he took, and the sweat he’d worked up just from walking. It didn’t take long before Gray decided he couldn’t stand to watch the stubborn idiot suffer any longer, and despite Natsu’s loud protests, he’d picked him up and kept walking.

Natsu fell asleep soon after, leaving Gray to consider everything he’d seen and heard- Natsu going into Dragon Force against the golems, Rogue’s “death”, Wendy’s spell- but he soon decided these were all things he could tackle at a later time.

For right now, he just wanted to savor the feeling of Natsu’s warm body pressed against his back, the weight of the arms draped over his shoulders, the strength of the legs wrapped around his sides, and the sound of ragged breaths in his ear. All of which helped to reassure him that Natsu was alive, injured but ready to fight another day.

His features worked themselves into a scowl as his mind drifted back to Natsu’s insistence that the rain had weakened the slayers’ senses and hindered their efforts. All the rage he’d tried to contain resurfaced, and he could feel the inky tendrils of his devil slayer magic trying to grab purchase, just as they had earlier. His flaring emotions making it harder for him to control this new magic his father had bequeathed him.

Natsu’s fire magic was powerful. There was no way a little rain would give him any trouble, which meant it must have been a storm. One that somehow managed to miss Magnolia completely despite its proximity to Worth Woodsea. Only one person he knew of was capable of such localized weather, especially when she let her emotions take control.

His eyes narrowed as he remembered the flyer he’d been holding when Juvia had approached him the previous morning. It had been a monster request in the Great Plains, an area located closer to Worth Woodsea than Magnolia. And Gray was very familiar with Juvia’s tendency to follow him on jobs.

It wasn’t hard to put two and two together. Juvia had probably gone to the Great Plains looking for him, determined to get him to agree to be her partner for the S-Class exam, or talk about his outburst that morning. Either way, the result had been the same. She must have overreacted when she couldn’t find him and set off a storm around the Great Plains and Worth Woodsea. And while Gray knew that she would never purposefully put their friends in danger, it did nothing to change what had almost happened.

He would just have to make Juvia understand his feelings once and for all. He’d meant to talk to her ever since they’d returned to Magnolia but kept putting it off, knowing it would be uncomfortable and would only lead to conversations he’d rather avoid. That had been a mistake, one that had nearly cost him his friends.

He spent the rest of the walk coming up with what he would say to her, trying to determine the best approach, even though he knew all would be received poorly. By the time they arrived at Natsu’s cottage, Gray’s back was screaming in agony, and he was grateful for the distraction. Finding the door unlocked, he managed to get them inside without incident.

Happy was nowhere to be found, and Gray figured the Exceed must’ve gotten bored and headed for the guild. As Natsu was still fast asleep, he carried him into the bedroom, carefully lowering him onto the bed, thinking that he should get as much rest as he could before seeing Wendy. He’d take care of delivering the flowers and reporting back to Erza himself. Not knowing what else to do, Gray got ready to leave, and that’s when Natsu grinned, his eyes still closed, “I knew you were going to carry me, Ice Princess.” “Pfft! Well, that’s because you did look pathetic,” Gray retorted with a smile, amused to learn that the protests he’d received were all faked. He thought back to how excited Natsu had been right before he’d asked him to be his partner for the exam and wondered if maybe, just maybe, Natsu offering him that flower was supposed to have been a confession of some sort.

But that didn’t make any sense. He wouldn’t have burned it to a crisp and almost set off a forest fire if it was, right? No, Gray was sure it was just wishful thinking on his part. Still… Natsu had gone into Dragon Force to protect him from those golems, that had to mean something. Didn’t it? He quietly molded his ice into a perfect replica of the flower, creating a vase to put it in and placing both on the bedside table. He wasn’t sure if he’d ever be brave enough to express his feelings with words. But maybe, if he let his magic speak for him, he could get his feelings across just as well. Gray quickly let himself out of the house, knowing he might chicken out if he stayed any longer.

He wondered what Natsu would think of his flower once he woke up and hoped he’d understand what it meant. You never knew with the Flame Brain.

But even if he didn’t, Gray was heartened by the knowledge that they’d be spending a lot more time together soon. And with that single thought in his mind, he headed off to the guild, in a great mood for the first time in weeks.

A/N: While this is the end of this particular story, it is not the end of their story in this world. We are currently working on a story for Sting and Rogue where it goes into more detail into what happened in Worth Woodsea and how it affects them, so if you like this world keep an eye out for that one as well, as other stories that are currently in the planning stages.

Thanks for reading and letting us know you liked it! 

Maria and Burrito

[chickensarentcheap]

Sanctuary - Chapter 38

Warnings:  none really. Mark being a dick.  Some profanity.

Tagging: @alievans007, @c-a-v-a-l-r-y, @thorsbathroomchicken, @innerpaperexpertcloud, @valkyrie-of-the-light

She’s at the door before he even gets a chance to fully open; hearing the scratch of the key card being inserted and the soft click of the lock giving way.  Hair pushed away from her face with a wide fabric head band; eyes wide with a mix of concern and slight panic, face ashen.

“What happened?” she asks, stepping back to allow him into the small foyer.  “I woke up and I saw your note and I started freaking out…”

“I left you the note so you wouldn’t freak out,” he sets the deadbolt, slides the chain into place. “Did anyone call the room? Anyone come to the door?”

“No. No one,” she stands on her tip toes as he leans down to press a chaste kiss to her lips. “What’s going on? Is everything okay? Neither of us are supposed to leave and I woke up and you were gone and I lost it a little bit and…”

He places a hand on the side of her face and silences her with a kiss; longer this time, his lips soft and tender against her own. Still on her tiptoes, both arms circling his neck. he curls an arm around her waist and pulls her tightly into him. Continuing to hold her long after the kiss comes to an end, the hand that was cradling her face now moving to the back of her head, pressing her face into his chest. He needs this.  This moment. A chance to just feel her body against his. To feel the warmth that radiates off her, the way her heart beats against him,  the way her fingertips feel as they softly scratch at the nape of his neck. He’s never realized just how much he actually does need this; to not only hold her, but have her hold in in return. It’s comforting. Soothing. And it helps to alleviate that last bit of rage that had been threatening to swallow him whole.

“Tyler…” she’s the first to pull away; tears sparkling in her eyes. “…what’s going on? And don’t say nothing because I know you. I know your expressions. I know the different tones of your voice. I know how your eyes change colour based on your moods. And I know how  you get. When something is wrong. I feel it in your arms. The way hold me when you’re upset…it’s different. So different.”

That’s what five and a half years and incredibly strong bond can do. He’d become quite adept on ‘reading’ her as well.  Knowing what the different facial expressions mean before she even opens her mouth to speak. Hearing the changes in her voice and her tone.  Able to easily decipher her body language.  He’d never had that with a woman before. Not even his first wife. In fact, he’d never had that with anyone. A bond so powerful and so all consuming that it can be overwhelming. It’s what happens, he supposes, when two broken people actually do succeed at not only fixing one another, but saving each other.

“You have to promise me that you’ll stay calm,” he says. “I need you to keep calm. Not just for yourself but for the baby.  There’s not just you anymore. I need you to stay calm for the both of you.”

“Okay,” she agrees.

“Promise me.”

“I promise.  What’s going on? Because my mom just called and she said that you told her to go back to her place. I mean, she was supposed to be gone two days ago after I told her to get the fuck out, but that’s besides the point. And she said that Ovi and Chloe just took off. With the kids. And Mac. What is going on?”

“What did I just say? About calming down?”

“I am calm. I’m not freaking out.  I’m…”

He smirks, then glances down at the tiny fists that have an iron clad grip on the front of his t-shirt.

“Maybe I’m not as calm as I thought,” she relaxes her grip, but the tears that are threatening are raw and bitter and her entire body is trembling.

“Okay, you need to relax. Just relax…” he rubs his hands down her arms; starting at the shoulders and then moving slowly down to her wrists and then travelling upwards again. “…what has been the number one cause of any of problems you had all the other times you were pregnant?”

“Stress.”

“Exactly. So I really need you not to stress. I need you nice and calm, okay? Because we’re in a foreign country and far from home and your own doctor, so…” he presses a kiss to her brow. “…just relax.”

She rests her forehead against his chest, hands entirely releasing his shirt in favour of finding their place on his hips. Eyes closed as she draws in deep, steady breaths and then lets them slowly and smoothly.

“You need to just listen to everything I say. Can you do that? Can you just stay nice and quiet while I explain everything? I need you to that for me. Esme…” he runs a hand over her hair, then tangles his fingers in some of the tresses and gently pulls her head back, encouraging her to look up at him.  “…I need you to listen to me. I need you to hear everything I’m saying. Can you do that? Please?”

She nods.

“I called Ovi this morning. While you were sleeping. To check on things. And he told me that there’s been some weird stuff going on. People have been calling the house. They’ve been leaving photos in the mailbox. Of the kids. Of you with the kids. Of me and you together.”

Her eyes widen.

“And someone showed up. At the house. Looking for me.”

“But…” she begins, and then stops, biting down on her bottom lip.

“Ovi said they had accents. Like mine, but different. Whoever it was, they were from New Zealand. They were definitely related to the Buckmans in some way. Now I don’t know why they’d go there, because I was made the second I got on the plane in Colorado. They knew I was here. Or at least they’d heard I was here. There’s only two reasons why they would show up at the house. One is to make sure that I found out and would go running back as soon as I did, just leaving them to do whatever the hell they want here to the McMann kids.  The second is to make sure that I was really gone. That I wasn’t anywhere nearby when they came after our kids. Because that’s what they’ll do. They’ll go for the kids. Out of revenge. They won’t come after me personally. They’ll go after what they know will make me vulnerable.”

Her teeth are digging hard enough into her lip to nearly draw blood.  Her chest heaving as she struggles to breathe through the flood of emotions threatening to surge through her. Her entire body trembling.

“Listen to me…” he implores, and once more takes her face in her hands.   “…settle down…it’s okay…just breathe, baby. Just breathe. Everything is under control, I promise. You remember what I told you? About the money that I hid in the garage? And the weapons?”

She nods.

“I told Ovi to take the money and the guns. I told him to pack up the kids and Chloe and take off. And not to contact me until he got somewhere safe. I told him to ditch his old phone and get a new one, just in case the old one has a trace on it. The kids are safe with him. You know they are. He’s one of the few people I actually do trust with you and your kids, you know that. Everything is going to be okay. He’s going to get them somewhere safe and he’ll let us know when he does. You have to trust him, Esme. And you have to trust me. You have to trust that I made the decisions I did to keep them safe.”

“I do. I do trust him. And I do trust you. With my life. With our kids lives.”

“It’s going to be okay.  I found out about this before anything bad actually happened. I had time to make things right. I had time to protect them.  This could have been so much worse. Are you okay? You took that a lot better than I thought you would. I thought for sure you might snap on me and punch me in the face. Or knee me in the balls. Normally you’d freak out on me regardless of what I said.”

“I’m…I don’t know…I think…I think I’m going to be sick.”

She rushes for the washroom and he follows dutifully…albeit reluctantly…behind. It’s his weakness; the one thing that makes him physically ill.  Not even the actual act of throwing up itself; but the sound.  It doesn’t matter if it’s her or one of the kids; he mentally can not cope with it.  But at the same time, he knows she needs him.  That it’s partly his fault that she’s like this in the first place:  kneeling in front of the toilet, vomiting profusely and violently.  So he briefly lingers in the doorway, taking a few seconds to prepare himself before actually rendering aide.

He turns the cold water on in the sink. Both to effectively block out the retching noises and to soak one of the hotel facecloths; tightly ringing it out and then filling one of the glasses that sit on the counter top.  It’s given her enough time to actually finishing throwing up; and he breathes an internal sigh of relief and turns off the top before joining her where she sits with her cheek pressed against the cold seat, eyes closed and tears streaming down her face.

“It’s okay,” his voice is calm and soothing as he crouches down beside her; ignoring the cracking of his knees and the discomfort that accompanies it. He’s not sure what’s actually caused her to be ill; if it’s everything he’d just dropped onto her plate or actual morning sickness. Or even a mixture of both.  She’s suffered through every one of her pregnancies; horrific bouts of all day sickness, never mind just in the morning. To the point she’s initially lost weight instead of gaining it and had to be hospitalized for dehydration. Which is definitely not what she needs while being in a foreign country so far from him. “Neck or forehead?” he asks, and she cracks on eye open as he holds the facecloth where she see it.

“Forehead,” she whimpers, and he pushes her hand away when she attempts to take the cloth from him.

“I got it,” he says, as he presses the damp, cool fabric to her brow. “I got you.”

She manages a smile.

“You okay now? Got it all out?”

“I think so.  I really hate you right now, thought. Just saying.”

“I told you why I did what I did. That I told Ovi to take off and…”

“Not that,” she gives a small laugh. “I mean this. The reason I’m puking in the first place. You may have really strong and ridiculously good looking genes, but there’s something in them that totally fucks with my system. It’s not enough that all the kids we make have to look and act exactly like you? But I also have to suffer like this first? Like, where’s the humanity?”

“Well, at the risk of you punching me in the face for saying it, I’m not the only one to blame for this.”

“I don’t even get how it happened in the first place. It had to have happened before we actually agreed to have another one.  And you were using condoms. We were being careful.”

“I guess not careful enough.”

“You probably intentionally sabotaged them. You’re probably one of those guys that pokes holes in them on purpose.”

“Yep,” he grins, and presses the facecloth against each of her cheeks. “That’s totally what I did.”

She glares at him. “Tell me you’re joking, Tyler James or I will punch you in the face.”

“Of course I’m joking. I’d never do something like that and you know it,” he presses a kiss to her temple, pushes sweaty strands of her behind her ears.  “I may have forgotten to wear one a couple of times, but…”

“Oh, shades of Dhaka. How cute. Because you didn’t learn your lesson the first time, right?”

“There wasn’t a lesson to learn. We did what we did, you got pregnant, we ended up having a beautiful little girl. End of story.”

“I still remember when she was born. How you cried. When the nurse gave her to you. You had the most amazing, content, peaceful smile on your face and these tears were streaming down. And you were looking down at her and it…” she finds herself getting emotional at the memory. “…you’d never looked so beautiful as you did right then.”

“Normally I’d get pissed that you’d call me that, but I’ll let you have it. Just this once,” he teases, rubbing her back comfortingly as she pushes herself up into a sit and then shuffles backwards in order to lean back against the wall of the of the tub.  “Here…” he offers the glass of water, then tosses the facecloth into the tub and joins her; sitting alongside of her, stretching his legs out and wrapping his arm around her shoulders.

“That’s your bad arm,” she scolds.

“It’s fine.  Hardly any pain. Well, besides what’s always there. Stop giving me a hard time. I’m trying here.”

“You’re a massive study in contradiction, you know,” she says, as she turns her body sideways and drapes both of her legs over his thighs. “People see this absurdly tall, crazy muscular, intimidating guy and immediately assume that you’re that way all the time. That you’re always aggressive and assertive. Maybe even scary. And you’re not. You’re not like that at all. I mean, you are when you have to be.  But you’re so different when it’s just us. Or when you’re with your kids.’

“What I’m supposed to be like when I’m with you?” he grins, and drops a kiss on the top of her head. “Or with the kids? Am I supposed be that guy that kicks ass and impales people with garden rakes? Or would you rather me like this?”

“Definitely like this,” she smiles, and sips her water.  “Although I have to admit, I’m almost embarrassed to admit that the other Tyler turns me on too.  The savage one. The one that is capable of doing things like that. That is bad ass and brutal and would do anything to protect me and his kids. There’s something oddly sexy about that. When I think about some of the things you’ve done to people, I don’t know.  It actually makes me wet.”

“Jesus Christ,” he chuckles. “You get weirder and weirder with each passing day, I swear.”

“But here you are.  Still hanging in there. Despite the fact I’m a raging bitch some of the times and I haven’t actually been the model wife over the past five and a half years.”

“We’ve both fucked up.  We’ve been said some things and done some things were pretty shitty.  But that doesn’t mean we don’t love each other. If you think about how badly things went the first time either of us were married, we’ve had a lot of shit to get past.  And we did it.  Together. Neither of us walked away even when things got really bad. You could have easily told me to fuck off for good when we separated. And I wouldn’t have blamed you if you did. You even could have taken off with the kids and I would have deserved it.”

He’d been a wreck.  It had been entirely his fault; he’d pushed her too hard when it came to choosing the job over her and the kids. He’d kept testing her limits time and time again and eventually she’d just snapped. And it would have been so easy to blame her, to make her out to be the best person.  Paint her as the unsupportive, nagging, overbearing and demanding wife. But he hadn’t. He’d fucked up and he’d known it and owned it. And he had taken the punishment for it.  Living for six months in a shit hole of a motel; throwing himself into the most dangerous jobs as possible and drowning the guilt and the pain in alcohol. And when she’d called him that night, he’d honestly been expecting the worst: that she needed an address to send divorce papers to.  

“I never would have done that to you,” she says. “Taken your kids from you. I would never have kept them from you. Because even when you were a shitty husband, you were always an amazing father. Just because you didn’t love me, didn’t me you didn’t love them. I’ve never doubted that.”

“I’ve always loved you. I may not have always acted like it, but I did. I don’t think the problem is that we stopped loving each other.”

“It’s that we love each other too much sometimes,” she says, and then frowns. “Which is strange to say when you think about it. Is it even possible to love someone too much? Maybe if you blindly love someone and put them on some kind of pedestal and than you’re completely heartbroken when they don’t live up to your expectations. But that doesn’t sound like us. At least not to me, anyway. I mean, I always knew you were an asshole. So it didn’t surprise me when you started acting like one.”

“When I started acting like one? I was an asshole when we first met.”

“You were fine when I met you and bathroom chicken. But you turned into an asshole when you tried to choke me out after that first fight we had in Dhaka.”

“For the record, I didn’t try and choke you out. I wasn’t trying to kill you.”

“You were trying to get in my pants?”

“Well not at first. At first you just pissed me off. To the point I wanted to choke you out.”

“And then it became the kinky kind of choking me out.”

“Yeah…” he chuckles. “…I guess it did.”

“We are so fucked up,” she giggles.  “I mean, at least we can admit it, right? That we are two very seriously messed up people.”

“Maybe that’s what makes us perfect for each other,” he reasons.  “Maybe because we can admit it and we can accept it. We know we’re not perfect. We don’t expect each other to be perfect. But we keep working on things. Even when people think we should just give up and walk away.”

She frowns. “You’ve been talking to my mother, haven’t you.”

“Believe it or not, she’s not the only person who thinks I’m not good enough for you.”

“No. She’s not. You’ve spent five and a half years thinking that about yourself.”

He nods in agreement.

“And you don’t think I’ve felt that same way? That you deserve better than me? I’ve thought that tons of times. That you’d be better off without me. That it would be healthier for you if you just walked away and never looked back.”

“I never would,” he says. “Walk away.”

“You realize that can be either a blessing or a curse, right?”

“Yup,” he rubs at her thigh, presses a kiss to her forehead. “But I like to think it’s more of a blessing. Because I kind of like the way my life is now. With you. With my kids. With…” he places a palm against her stomach. “…the little bean.”

She smiles. It’s their ‘thing’; he’d come up with the nickname ‘little bean’ when she’d shown him Millie’s first ultrasound picture. He’d still be laid up in the hospital; recovering from knee replacement surgery and still struggling to regain a healthy chunk of his strength and stamina. It had killed him not to be there with her; at her side when she to see the baby…his baby….for the first time.  And when she’d shown him that picture…pointing out where the technician had seen the umbilical cord, the heart, even the spine…all he’d seen was a bean.  The nickname had stuck; being passed down to each of their unborn children.

“Please tell me everything is going to be okay, Tyler. Even if it’s not. Just tell me it will.”

“You mean with the baby or…”

“Everything. With everything that’s going on. Just say it’s going to be okay. Even if you don’t believe it. Even if everything is telling you that this is all going to go horribly wrong. I need you to hear you say it. That it’s going to be okay.”

“It  is going to be okay. I’m not just saying it because it’s what you want to hear. I’m saying it because it’s true. The kids are safe where they are. With Ovi and Chloe. And you’re safe here with me. Everything’s going to be fine, Esme. I promise.”

She gives a sigh; it’s content, satisfied. At least for now.  And she nestles her face into his neck; the tip of her nose and her soft breath tickling his skin.

“But there is something I need you to do for me,” he says. “Well not for me. With me.”

“Oh god…Tyler…what now…I love you, but what do you want now?”

“I know you said you were going to call that Billy guy. The bartender. And completely back out on getting together with him.  I don’t want you to do that. I want you to still go.”

“We just talked about this, Tyler. You were the one who didn’t want me to. Because of the baby. You were worried that something would happen. To both of us.”

“I am worried about that. Which is why you wouldn’t be going alone. I’d be going with you.”

She pulls back look at him, eyes narrowed, brow furrowed. “How would that even work?  I came here because you’d been made and you needed me to and meet with these people and get info. I wouldn’t have come here if you were able to do it yourself. So why…”

“Do you trust me?”

“Of course I trust you. This isn’t about trusting you or not trusting you.”

“We’re going to walk in there and I’m going to tell them exactly who I am…who we are…and ask him for his help. A business proposition. I’m going to give him a chance to help us bring McMann down. It’s what the IRA wants, right? Revenge? And McMann has information we need. That will lead  us to his wife and his kids.  We need to find those  kids, Esme. I need to get them out of there.”

“And you think this the only way to do it? To trust the IRA? Tyler, that sounds a little…insane.”

“They hate him just as much as we do, if not more. And he’s far more scared of them than he is of me. So why not sic the IRA on him in order to get what we want? They have ways of getting the information we need. We won’t even have to get our hands dirty.  They can get more out of him than we can. So let them do it. Let them get what we need.’

“In exchange for letting them do whatever they want to him?”

He nods.

“That could get messy, Tyler. What stops them for coming back after you?”

“I’ve done nothing to piss them off. But the McMann has. And so have the Buckmans. What if I get the kids out and let the IRA take down the Buckmans? What if that’s the deal? What if all I want is information on where those kids are and I give them both McMann and the Buckmans in exchange.  They won’t turn that down.  And it keeps me out of their shit.  I do not want to be going toe to toe with the IRA. And I know you don’t want me doing that, either.”

“This is risky and you know it.”

“The job is always risky. But this the cleanest way we can go about saving both the McMann kids and our kids.”

“You think the IRA will take it?”

“Why wouldn’t they? They want revenge, right? On McMann and the Buckmans? I have nothing on the IRA. I’ve never pissed them off or stepped on their toes. I’m just the guy that McMann was trying to use to stir up some shit. They don’t care about me. But I can give them what they want.”

“What can they give you? Other than the McMann kids?”

“Protection. For our kids. If the Buckmans can get to Colorado, so can the IRA. If I give them what they want, they give me what I want. They won’t turn that down. McMann is too big of a prize. The Buckmans are just extra incentive.”

“Are you sure about this?  Like are you one hundred percent sure? Because I’ll go along with it if you are. If you can look me in the eye and tell me that this is how you want to do things. That this is going to work.”

He lays one hand on the back of her head, the other on the side of her face, locking eyes with her. “This is how I want to do things. And it’s going to work. I know it’s going to work.”

“Okay,” she says with a sigh.  “I’ll do it. I’ll help you. But I swear to God, Tyler Rake, you can’t ask me for any more favours for at least eight months. Until this baby finishes baking and it comes out safe and sound.  Because I’m not risking anything happening to little bean. Not even for you. Deal?”

“Deal,” he agrees, and seals it with a kiss.

****

“You realize this insane, right?” Mark inquires, prior to the start of the impromptu team meeting Yaz had called for.  With only two hours remaining before the meeting with William Flynn, there were things that needed to be ironed out:. Someone needed to go into the pub and place hidden cameras in the back room,  a sure fire escape plan and route needed to drawn out just in case things didn't go exactly as planned, there needed to be back up stationed somewhere outside.  It isn't as simple as just sending someone in to get information. Every possible scenario...good and bad...had to be plotted out and considered, along with ways to solve any problems that might crop up.  “This is never going to work.”

“Could you just once try and be optimistic?” Esme counters, as she pours herself a cup of tea out of the carafe that sits in the middle of the conference table. The hotel has been good to all of them during their stay; always offering up one of their rooms for their 'business meetings', providing them with food and drink. Whatever the size of the donation Nik had given them at the start of things, it had ensured both their hospitality and their silence.  

“Could you for once not just look at the bright side of things?” he shoots back, as he prepares a coffee for himself. “That was always one of your weaknesses. Being overly optimistic.”

“Well I'm sorry Mister Negative, if I can't always live under a dark cloud like you can.  Do you have a list of these weaknesses written down somewhere? Did you take notes? You know, so you could eventually throw them all in my face?”

“This is exactly why it didn't work. Why we didn't work,” he says. “You have to always get one up on someone. There always has to be some smart ass comment. You can never just stay quiet.”

“And here I was thinking that things didn't work because you're  a gas lighting, manipulative asshole who couldn't keep his dick in his pants. But go on, Mark. Tell me all about how I'm the only one to blame for things disintegrating between us.”

“You know, maybe if you'd been more devoted to keeping things together...to being more wife like...I wouldn't have had to resort to the things I did.  A man has needs you know. And you weren't always willing to fill those.”

“Oh so now it's the lack of sex that was the problem. That's what caused all of our issues. That's what turned you into a giant narcissistic dick bag. Do you ever just sit back and listen to the shit that comes out of your mouth? You should really record yourself one of these days. So you can go back and listen to the crap that you spew.”

“I admit, I had my issues.”

“”You think?” she scoffs. “You let a stewardess give you a blow job on the flight home from our honeymoon.  Do you really think that could have been one of our issues?”

“But you weren't one hundred percent innocent. I know you like to play the victim. You want everyone to think that I was the bad guy and...”

“You were the bad guy.  I didn't deserve any of the things you did to me and you know.  You don't need me to make you look horrible because you are horrible. You're a shitty human being, Mark. And you were an even shittier husband. I wasn't the perfect wife.  But I didn't deserve what you did. I didn't deserve any of it. You can spend the rest of your life lying to yourself that you weren't the one that caused all the issues, but it will never change the fact that you did.  Get the fuck over yourself. You're not as charming and handsome as you think you are. Get a grip.”

“Who are you going to blame when things fall apart between you and Tyler?” he challenges. “Because they will. Fall apart. And it's going to be even worse than when things fell apart between us. Because now there's four perfectly innocent little kids involved in your bullshit and...”

“Five,” she interjects, and helps herself to a slice of pineapple from the fresh fruit tray in the middle of the table.  “There's five. Well, four and a half if you want to get technical about things.”

Mark's eyes narrow. “You have got to be fucking kidding me. Is that all the two of you do? Fuck and make kids? Is that what your whole marriage exists of?”

“Well unlike when I was married to you, I actually like fucking the husband I have now.  That and he actually knows how to give orgasms and doesn't just expect them. He also knows what the g spot is and where it is.  You could always ask for pointers. I'm sure he'd be willing to teach you a few things. You know, so you're not an epic failure when it comes to pleasing your next wife.”

“Next wife? You ruined the entire marriage experience. You ruined other women for me. And not in a good way, just so you know.”

“Am I supposed to be offended by that? Mark, I don't lose any sleep at night over your opinion of me. I have a clear conscience. You know, I thought after nine years apart, you wouldn't be such a massive dick. You were showing so much promise. You came looking for absolution, you actually apologized for your shit, you gave me your help when you asked for it. You even showed up here. Which isn't exactly what I wanted when I asked you for help, but it is what it is.  You start out good and then you just shit the bed and prove you're still the same fuck nut you were when things went to shit between us.”

“And you call me manipulative? He has no clue how badly you're manipulating him.  How you've actually trapped him into staying. He has no fucking idea just how trapped he actually is.”

“Jesus Christ, Mark. You're a real piece of work. How can you even stand the sound of your own voice? Are you honestly that upset that I moved on with my life? You should be happy for me.  That I could even stand another man touching me after some of the shit you pulled. Why can't you just be happy for me? Why can't you just admit you messed up and that you're glad I could get over it and move on with my life.  And I haven't trapped him. He's free to go if he wants to, and he knows it.”

'Like he's going to leave his kids behind,” Mark gives a derisive snort. “There's no way he'd take off and leave his kids. So you just keep giving him more and more, guaranteeing he won't leave.  That's actually pretty smart, you know. I'll give you credit. That's pretty goddamn devious. You're like some evil genius.”

“Yes, that's my dastardly  plan. You figured it out. I just keep letting him come inside of me and knocking me up so that he'll stick around. You figured it out, Mark.”

“It won't work, you know. The two of you. Not in the long run. Because he's going to wake up one day and realize just how fucked he is and how well you played him and then it's all going to blow up in your face. And he is going to take off and you know what's going to happen when he does? He's going to take those kids from you and there won't be any way to stop it. He'll leave and he'll take the kids with him and you'll be alone. Again. And it will be all your fault.”

“Mark, you are about five seconds away from me punching you in the face.  Do you know how humiliating that would be? To be punched in the face by a woman? And not just any woman. A pregnant woman? So I think you should stop while you're ahead. Because the people in this room? They will wreck you. There's nothing Tyler wants more than to beat your ass into the middle of next week. And it won't take much for me to convince him to do it. So keep pressing your luck. He's kind of in a mood and he wouldn't mind taking it out on you.”

He glances across the room; to where Tyler and Yaz are immersed in an intense conversation.  Tyler has a good five inches on him; and at least twenty to thirty pound of sheer muscle and power. “I could take him.”

Esme can't help but laugh. “Sure. Sure you could. Why don't you go over there and try? I'd love to see you try. Do you realize the things he can do to people with his bare hands? He could kill you with one of the coffee cups. But by all means, if you think you stand a chance, go ahead. Start some shit. I'd love to see it.”

“I don't think I will.”

“Oh of course not.  Because you know you'd be demolished.”

“Nik wouldn't approve. If I beat the shit out of her favourite toy.”

“Okay, now you are really starting to piss me off.”

“Burns your ass, doesn't it? The fact he was fucking her before he was fucking you? I'll give him credit; he's got great taste. First her, now you.  He knows how to choose A plus ass, that's for sure.”

“First off, Tyler and Nik happened long before I ever came along. Second, you're a disgusting piece of shit for even talking about her like that. Nik and I don't always see eye to eye and we've had our issues, but she's still my friend. And she deserves better than you talking about her like that. What the hell is wrong with you?”

“She's on her way here, you know.”

“Nik?” Esme arches an eyebrow.  “Why?”

“Well, two reasons, actually.  The first is, she's pissed. With the little stunt Tyler pulled this morning. Sending the Indian kid away with your bunch.”

“His name isn't 'Indian kid'. His name is Ovi. And you'll call him by his name or you will get a punch in the throat. Even when he was fourteen he was a bigger man than you are now. You would have been crying like a little bitch if you went through what he did.”

“And second, she's coming to see me.”

“Why the hell would anyone come all that way to see you. That's a waste of perfectly good air miles.”

“Because unlike you, she knows a good thing when she has it.”

“Oh my God,” she laughs. “Are you serious right now? You? And Nik?”

“We kind of have a 'thing' going on.”

“You just met. And you haven't even seen each other in person. How can you have a 'thing'?”

“That's the beauty of technology. We can see each other even if it's not in person.  And you're the last person who should be saying anything about people 'just meeting'. You were fucking Tyler three days after you met him. When you were supposed to be working. I know all your dirty little secrets, Esme. I know how the two of you shacked up in that hotel in Dhaka together and couldn't stop fucking each other while on the job. And I know he ended up getting you pregnant and that's the only reason he asked you to marry him in the first place.”

Her eyes narrow. “That is not why he asked. You have no clue what you're talking about.”

“You're so naive. You really think there was another reason behind why he asked? I'll hand it to him.  He stepped up and took responsibility. He could have easily just told you to fuck off and get out of his life. But he actually asked you to marry him. That's pretty huge. That he'd be willing to take a risk like that, not even knowing if the kid was his for sure. I mean, if you were that willing to fuck him after just meeting him, he probably thought there would be tons of other guys you were fucking too.”

“There is something wrong with you, Mark. There is something very seriously wrong with you. You have no idea why Tyler made the decisions he did. I gave him an option. I told him that if he didn't want to be part of things that I'd leave and I'd never bother him again. That I didn't even expect child support out of him. So...”

“Did you really think he'd go along with that? Come on, Esme. You're smarter than that. You knew he'd stick around.  You knew he wasn't going anywhere. He already lost one brat, he wasn't going to take the chance of losing another.”

“His name was Austin, you sick fuck.  And he was six years old and he had cancer. How dare you talk about a child like that?A dead child. What is wrong with you?”

“Save your outrage for someone who gives a shit, Esme.  You really didn't think he'd let you leave, did you? That he'd let you just walk away and take his baby with you? You knew he wouldn't.  You knew he'd want you to stick around. And it was just a bonus when he asked you to marry him. And now look. Five and a half years later, four kids, another one on the way. Congratulations on that, by the way. You can be a shit human being, but you're a good mother. I'll give you that much.”

She opens her mouth to speak, then clamps it shut when the door to the conference room opens and three newcomers step in. Two males, one female.  Fairly young; mid to late twenties at the older.  And Mark greets them warmly; handshakes and one armed hugs.

“These are the Marines you asked for,” he address Esme.  “When you wanted my help and asked if I knew anyone around these parts that I could get to watch things. These are three of the best I've ever had work under me. I knew right away they were the ones I wanted on the job.  We've got Zak,  Nathan, and Tanis.  Lieutenant, Staff Sargent, Gunnery Sargent. Respectfully.”

“You were in the elevator that night,” Esme says. “The night I got here. You were pretending to be newlyweds and you were the third wheel.”

“We followed you guys from the airport,” Zak reveals.  “We weren't taking any chances. So we hung back and just let on we were normal people.”

“And was it the two of you...” she looks at Tanis and Nathan.  “...that were outside of our room? I heard you talking. I tried to follow you but...”

“They've been staying right under your nose,” Mark says.  “Right down the hall. In that room the housekeeper convinced you was empty. Yeah, she's on my payroll too. What? You think Nik is the only one that has people she can call to get shit done? It's a booming business, Esme. Lots of pieces of  the pie to go around.”

“Since when does the FBI get into the mercenary business?” she inquires. “I thought the Feds were more interested in stopping mercenaries than helping them.”

“We're not technically mercenaries, ma'am,” Nathan replies.  “But we know a good payout when we see one. You're a former Gunny. You know the corps pays shit. Have to pay the bills somehow, right?”

“And this is just my side gig,” Mark speaks up.  “This is strictly off the books.  A little something to keep me busy when I get bored. And these fellas have a score to settle with McMann themselves, so...”

“Killed a buddy of ours,”  Zak reveals. “Former corpsman we served with. That went into the business. Killed him during an extraction in Guatemala.”

Esme frowns.  “Guatemala? Almost three weeks ago? My husband was working on an extraction in Guatemala. What the hell is going on here? McMann said he was there to watch Tyler. To watch him before asking him for help.”

“He wasn't there to watch Tyler,” Mark says. “He was there to kill Tyler.”

“Our buddy was providing tactical support,” Nathan explains.  “He worked for Nik. That's who your husband works for, right? Nik Khan?”

She nods.

“He'd only been on the job for a few weeks,” Zak adds. “He was super stoked about it, too.  Everyone knows who Tyler Rake is. The guy is a fucking legend. What with the Dhaka job and all that. I mean, you pretty much cement yourself as a fucking king when you can survive that.”

“He's the whole reason Quinn went into the business to begin with,” Nathan says.  “To work with the man. All but had to beg Nik to give him a chance.  He was over the fucking moon when she took him on and sent him into Guatemala. It was his first big gig. First extraction. And when McMann tipped his hand, Quinn found out about what he was up to and he went after him. To stop him.  Which he did. But...”

“Jesus Christ.” Esme mutters, and lays a hand on her stomach; feeling nauseous.

“McMann never wanted Tyler's help,” Mark tells her. “This was all a set up from the very beginning. Both him and his wife are in on it. But the kids are missing. That part is true.  But McMann brought Tyler here to kill him. Because he failed the first time.  And he knew that Tyler would take the bait.  What other way to get him to cooperate? A guy that has four kids of his own? He knew if he brought children into this, Tyler wouldn't say no. So now, here we are.  Caught up in one big shitty fucking mess.”

“But the kids are still missing,” Esme concludes. “They still need his help. Tyler's help.”

“He's the only one that can help them,” Mark says.  “And hopefully we can work together to stop him from dying in the process.”

[ijustwant2write]

The Butterfly Effect-Bucky Barnes x Powers!Reader

(GIF credit to @rubyslaugh and UGH I LOVE THIS ONE)

Masterlist

Requested by anonymous

Summary: Okie so this is kinda a request but idk exactly what I want 😂 so basically like the reader is an avenger cause she got powers on accident in a lab (like banner) and she has the ability to control plants and like nature and bugs, and basically when ever Bucky is around butterflies form and start flying around her and the rest of the teams realizes but he’s oblivious. Eventually she admits her feelings but he’s not sure cause he’s scared to hurt her, but the end up together? Thank youuuu 💗

Characters: Bucky Barnes x Powers!Reader, mentions of Avengers

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

Warnings: slight swearing, mention of injuries, fluff

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Tenderly watering the plants in the greenhouse, I smiled as they instantly lifted around me, growing a few centimetres taller, a little more vibrant in colour. Ever since the accident, my love for gardening grew, as well as my observations. My (dream) job had been working in a lab with different plants, some common and some rare; we were developing ways to grow vegetation quicker to help with problems such as deforestation. However, the company in charge and supplying the money for this huge project didn’t care as much as the scientists did, using radioactive chemicals as well as many other unknown substances. Of course we had protested about this but they didn’t listen. And for some reason, I was the one who took the fall. It was all a big accident, they were testing the substance without my permission, and I I tried to stop them it had spilt all over me. Then I discovered my new abilities.

Plants responded to me, I was able to control them, and now I could even form them out of my bare hands! Recently, insects had also started to respond to me, and one night after a wonderful dream, I awoke to find a butterfly unfolding in my hand. It was truly beautiful, but I had had to keep it a secret. Though I must have not done a good job of that seeing as I was recruited by the Avengers. I had never thought about fighting with plants, however after they showed me the aggression I could use behind it, I found that I was creating massive, twisted vines, enough to crush bones, to pull up the ground and split it open. The grounds weren’t looking too neat after that.

“Hey, (Y/N)! There you are.” Scott announced as he walked into the greenhouse, a wilted cactus in his hand.

“Hi, oh, he’s not looking too good there.”

“Yeah, that’s what I actually came here for.”

“Scott, that’s one of the easiest plants to look after, what happened?”

“Hey, it’s hard being a superhero and a plant mom too!”

“You can’t keep coming to me for help when a plant starts dying.”

“It’s only happened twice before. Please, I will take care of it.”

I sighed before taking the cactus from him, concentrating on making it better. It slowly straightened itself, a beautiful green colour slowly creeping up from the bottom of the plant to the top, the soil now a dark brown and wet. I handed it back over, feeling like a mother telling off their child.

“Thanks (Y/N). Foods ready by the way.”

As I followed him, I had one of those cliche moments; who would ever imagine being in a situation like this? An accident in a lab gave me powers and here I was, fighting with the Avengers; I was an Avenger! All my life I had been the nerdy girl, obsessed with vegetation, friendly but quiet, never speaking up unless absolutely necessary. Yet here I was, surrounded by these amazing people, not only amazing because of their powers and strengths, because of who they were and how they had accepted me. 

In a rare event that everyone was at the base (Steve, Tony, Nat, Clint and Bucky just back from a mission), we were all able to sit down and eat together. Wanda had taken on the role of chef here, a passion she had relighted to keep her happy and busy. She had plated up, some of the team already sat down. I went to grab a plate, bumping into Bucky. Immediately I retracted my hand, suddenly my usual composure tensing, heart beating slightly louder.

“Sorry, you get yours first.”

“Sorry.” I hated how quiet my voice was.

As I went to pick up the plate, three small appeared in my hand. I flinched as I saw them, causing them to flutter away. Wanda opened a window, watching as they flew outside.

“Sorry.” I repeated.“I didn’t actually mean to do that.”

Taking the food, I scurried to sit down, getting into the seat between Tony and Scott. Why had that happened? Was it just an absentminded thought? Was it nerves? Whatever it was, it was making me feel embarrassed for some reason, though no one said anything or even look bothered. Yes, I was an over-thinker, but I had done that in front of Bucky. 

No one could deny the alarmingly good looks of the former Winter Soldier. He was the typical strong silent type, mysterious and brooding at first until you got to know him. At first he had observed me, wondering what I would be like as a part of this team, as did the others. But once I was welcomed, his true colours showed. He was a sweetheart, he would always help me with whatever I needed, reassure me that I was meant to be here. He even tried gardening once but complained when the soil got into the metal of his arm. But I knew a relationship would never happen. We were Avengers, and although Scott and Clint had families, I didn’t see Bucky wanting that, understandable when you look back to what he had been through. It was another secret for me to keep from the world. 

The next morning, I joined Wanda and Nat in training, still thinking about the butterfly incident. It was distracting, and I didn’t know why I couldn’t just push it to the back of my mind. My own thoughts were pissing me off. Sighing to myself, I started warming up beside the others. I was too nervous at times, I needed more confidence in myself, I needed-

“Morning Bucky.” Wanda greeted him.

Fuck.

Great, just great. Just the distraction I needed. He was lovely enough just standing there, but working out? God that was another story. I smiled at him, making my way to the treadmill. Concentrate. Keep your mind focused. Don’t think about him, don’t wonder if he’s looking at you, if he’s lifting those extremely heavy weights....I hated myself sometimes.

“(Y/N)!” Nat startled me, suddenly beside me. I managed to keep my balance, still running.“Do you mind?”

“What?”

“The butterflies again!”

I looked around me, eyes widening and gasping as I saw the amount of butterflies around me. As I realised that there were definitely almost twenty of them, I lost my footing, falling onto my arm as the treadmill threw me off it. Screaming as I thudded onto the floor, I felt hot tears already falling down my cheeks, curling up into a ball when pain surged through me. Everyone fussed around me, giving me space once the shock passed.

“(Y/N), are you OK?” Nat asked, looking at my arm.

I winced.“It’s just my arm.”

“Your foot doesn’t look too good either.” Wanda pointed out.

“It’s fine.” I moved it, crying out when I realised she was right.

“I’ll take you to the hospital ward, there’s no way you’ll be able to get there by yourself.” Bucky said, already manoeuvring me into his arms.

“I’ll message Dr Cho, get her ready for you.” Nat got her phone out, texting away as Bucky stood up, holding me carefully. 

I tried to not cry, not wanting to look any worse in front of Bucky, but it was extremely hard when I couldn’t feel my arm and my foot was throbbing. I had one arm wrapped around his neck, the bad on tucked into my torso, trying not to lean into him. I was stiff in his arms, desperately thinking about anything other than Bucky, especially now and how he was so easily holding me; what a man.

“Oh, they’re back.” He smiled, nodding his head to the two butterflies appearing, they rested on my hair, and I huffed. God, would this nightmare ever end?

“I’m so sorry. This must be so annoying for everyone.” 

“I mean, it’s kind of pretty. At least it’s not flies or wasps, or any other annoying bugs.”

“I mean, I guess so.”

“How come they’re appearing so often? It’s never happened before.”

“Uh, I’m not actually sure. Maybe I’m not as in control of my powers, though I don’t know how that would happen.”

“Maybe you’re overworking.”

“Maybe.”

Dr Cho was waiting for me, gesturing towards the bed Bucky could place me on. When he asked if he should stay, I insisted that he leave. He didn’t need to see me like this anymore, and we didn’t need anymore butterflies in this place. Bucky reluctantly left, a kind smile on his face as he walked away. I let out a sigh of relief, happy that Dr Cho wanted to assess my injuries straight away. When she informed me that I had a minor sprain to the foot and a bad bruising on my arm, I groaned, pissed off at my own clumsiness. She advised that I use a wheelchair to get around (seeing as I couldn’t use crutches yet because of my arm), but when she asked if Bucky should come back, I immediately refused. She was surprised by my snappy tone, though brushed it off as I text Natasha to come get me. I seriously needed my girlfriends right now.

Nat wheeled me to my room, only speaking of my injuries until we got inside. With her help, we hauled myself onto the bed, propping my foot on top of pillows. She sat beside me, both of us resting against the headboard; my head lulled to the side, finding Nat already looking up at me.

“Nat, what do I do?” I moaned.

“What do you mean?”

“The butterflies, they keep appearing.”

“And we all know why.”

“Is it that obvious?”

“To everyone but him.”

“What if he’s playing dumb because he thinks I’m weird?”

“How can you be weird here? You’ve got super soldiers, secret spies, a girl with telekinetic powers, a man who shrinks, a hulk-”

I laughed.“OK, I get it. Still, I just don’t think he would be interest in a relationship.”

“Why?” she whined.

“Superheroes don’t date, especially not each other. Plus, have you seen him? No one would ever put us together.”

“Except everyone living in this facility right now.”

I hid my face in my hands.“Nat, stop getting my hopes up!”

“What, it’s cute! There are butterflies erupting from you every time you see him, it’s the sweetest thing in the world!”

“It’s mortifying.”

“Stop it! You put yourself down too much.”

“I’m being realistic.”

Before we could continue our endless cycle of arguing, someone knocked on the door. I called them in, nerves kicking in again as Bucky poked his head around the door. I glanced at Nat who had a smug smile on her face, instantly wriggling off the bed. I couldn’t say anything, not in front of Bucky.

“What good timing Bucky! I was about to get some more painkillers, you can keep (Y/N) company!” Natasha practically skipped out of the room, and I knew she was wearing a smirk.

Bucky shoved his hands in his pockets as he walked over, looking down at my foot.“I heard it’s sprained.”

“Yeah, it’s not too serious though. About four or five weeks resting.”

“Well I know where you’ll be spending all of that time.” He perched on the bed next to me.

“Where?”

“In your greenhouse of course. You’re in there for all of your free time anyway.”

I giggled.“I just miss my career, that’s all.”

“You always had a connection with plants, even before your powers. It’s obvious.”

I looked down at my hands, my head hurting from stopping the butterflies showing.“Thank you for earlier. It was sweet of you to take me to Dr Cho.”

“Just call me your knight in shining armour.”

I hesitated, wondering if I should just bring up the elephant in the room.“Bucky...you, uh....you must have noticed all the butterflies suddenly appearing.”

He slowly nodded.“Yeah?”

Oh my god, I’m an actual idiot. Can I even form a sentence anymore?

“Well, they only seem to be here when I’m near you and....well, uh....I think it’s for a reason.”

He stayed silent, only making me more nervous.

“I-I know the reason. I have feelings for you, and I think because I’ve been hiding them, it’s thrown off my control on my powers; and instead of admitting these feelings before, my powers have taken over to express myself.”

He didn’t say anything for a few seconds, and I seriously could have burst out crying there and then.“(Y/N), I....”

He doesn’t feel the same. That’s it, I’ve ruined everything.

“I won’t lie and say that I’ve never thought about it.” He ducked his head down, but I could see a small smile.“But why me?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, with everything that’s ever happened, I just.....(Y/N), you’re delicate and I’m...I’m not.”

“I don’t understand.”

“I’m not saying I don’t like you. It’s the total opposite. But, I’d be scared to hurt you.”

“Hurt me? How would you hurt me?”

“I don’t know. I don’t really want to think too far into it.”

“I’m sorry Bucky, if you don’t want this then-”

“That’s the thing, I do. I’m conflicted with myself. I guess....after everything that’s happened to me, it seems bizarre that anyone would want to be with me in that way.”

“How could you say that? All of your past, it wasn’t you, it was HYDRA. You’ve turned your life around so much since then.”

“I always thought that I would just focus on my work and then whatever happened, happened, My love life was just forgotten. Until you showed up that is.”

“Me?”

“Yeah, something happened when I laid eyes on you. You were beautiful, extremely smart and you wanted to do the best you could in any situation, despite it all being scary and new. I really respected you, I still do. I think if it were possible, there would be butterflies coming from me too.”

I sheepishly smiled, blushing profusely.“So, what are you saying?”

“(Y/N), are you sure you would want me?”

“I’m certain, I wouldn’t have even started a conversation like this if I wasn’t.”

“I..I’m not even sure what to say.”

“Say yes. Let’s make a go of this. I’m not a confident person, so right now I’m really shocked I’m even saying this all right now.”

He gleamed that gorgeous smile.“Then yes.”

As we smiled at each other, I felt something tickle my hand. Opening it up, we both looked down, a beautiful light red butterfly opening it’s wings. This had to be a sign, or at least something to add to the mood.

“I think this might stop the butterflies for now.”

“I hope so, but what if it has the opposite effect? What if more come?”

“Then we’ll be living in that greenhouse of yours.”

[bangtann-bangdamn]

Rumour Has It

<Taehyung x Reader>

Part 31 - Nothing else matters

After a prank goes wrong, Taehyung would do anything to make it up to you. Shame he keeps making things worse… 

Warnings: Mentions of violence.

There’s a dull ache racing across your chest. You groan as you try to turn onto your side, but something heavy weighs your hand down. Your eyes flutter open to find out what is stopping you from getting comfortable. All you see is the top of his long, messy dark hair lying next to your arm; his hand in yours. You move your free hand to brush a stray strand of his hair away from his face, but end up continuing to run your hand through his soft locks instead. It’s calming watching him sleep. You could forget everything that had happened in the last few days as you watch him sleep peacefully beside you. It didn’t matter anymore. None of it did when he was with you, and you weren’t sure when you had begun to feel like that.

His hand squeezes yours before he moves his head. He blearily looks around, taking in the bland hospital walls before focusing on your eyes.

“Ynie?” He croaks, rubbing the sleep away. He stares at you in confusion, like he can’t quite believe that you’re sitting in front of him. You wonder how long he’s been at your side, noting how crumpled his shirt is.

“Hi,” you whisper back, scared to say anything louder. Taehyung’s staring at you like you were about to break right in front of him.

“I’m so sorry.” Tears well up in his eyes as he picks up your hand and brings it to his mouth. “This is all my fault. I should have never taken Ivy’s word that she only made one copy of the flat key.”

You frown, the dull ache racing across the front of your mind stopping you from processing his words. “What? What are you talking about?”

“Ivy confessed… to pretty much everything.” He looks away from you, down at your entwined hands. “She said that she didn’t like the fact that we lived together. That she felt like you were stealing me from her. So, she started doing things that would make me dislike you. She mostly stuck to things that you threatened to do, like when you said you would throw Hobi’s speaker in the bin so it would be believable. She heard you smash your plate, but she thought you were smashing one of mine so she continued and left before anyone could catch her.”

“I knew she didn’t like me.” You laugh bitterly. You thought the truth would set you free, but here it was holding you down. You knew you weren’t the easiest person to get along with, especially when you were stressed. But you had never really understood why Ivy had taken a sudden dislike to you. You guess you couldn’t blame her. You probably would have felt the same if you saw your boyfriend getting closer to another girl. But you knew you wouldn’t have done those things. No matter how angry you were.

“She tried to kill you.” Taehyung looks up at you through his lashes. He looks so young in that moment, tears threatening to run down his tanned cheeks, that you have the urge to swaddle him. To wrap him in a blanket and to hold him close. The pain in your chest told you that that was not a good idea, so you settle for squeezing his hand as you gaze into his brown eyes.

He looks away from you as he licks his lips. “I’m just glad that Ivy confessed to everything because now her trial will be quick. They’re talking about charging her with attempted manslaughter.”

You move your hand away from his to touch his jaw. His eyes closed as he leans into your touch.

“I’m so sorry, Ynie. This is all my fault. If I never had-“

“Taehyung,” you interrupt, sniffling. You weren’t sure when your own tears started, but all you knew was that you needed to comfort him. You ignore the surge of pain that runs across your chest as you adjust your position in bed so you could be closer to him. You sense him wanting to fuss over you, but he doesn’t. “How did they know Ivy had me?”

Taehyung looks away from you. “When she sent the texts from your phone… I thought it was you, and I didn’t question it. I thought you were…”  He adjusts himself in his seat. “It was Hoseok who knew something was wrong first. He noticed your milk was out of date and it all sort of went from there.”

He’s quiet as moves away from your touch. He leans back in his chair and studies his hands.

You want to reach out, to run your hands through his hair and tell him that it wasn’t his fault. But just one glance at him, the way he holds his head with his shoulders slumped, tells you that nothing you could say would make this better. Nothing you could say would stop him from blaming himself.

“I should have been better at noticing that something wasn’t right,” he says softly.

You knew he probably hadn’t meant for you to hear, but you had. “It’s okay, Taehyung. I probably would have done the same,” you go to move your hand out to him, but stop when you notice the wires protruding from your arm. You let it flop back against the mattress in defeat.

“No. No, you wouldn’t have.” He looks up at you, eyes boring into yours. “I knew something was wrong. I could feel it in my gut. I’m never going to ignore it again.” He stands from his chair before moving it. Then he gets down on one knee.

“Taehyung… What are you doing?”

“Ever since our first kiss, I’ve had these feelings that I’ve been trying to suppress. I’ve never felt like this before. But I know. I know that you’re the one for me.”

“Tae, what do you mean?” Your heart’s beating heavily in your chest, you could barely breathe as you wait for him to continue.

He smiles up at you, his hand reaching into his pocket. The whole world moves slowly as he pulls his hand back out.

“Ynie, will you move in with me?” He opens his palm to reveal the key to his room with a smile.

You laugh hard enough to make your ribs hurt. “Why would you go down on one knee to ask that?” You say when he frowns at you.

“Isn’t – Isn’t that how you ask all the important questions?” He stands back up and sits next to you on the bed.

You sit up as best as you can, wincing when your ribs protest at the movement, so you could sit next to him. “No, sweetie. There’s only one question you go down on one knee for.”

Taehyung looks at you, your faces so close together but neither of you willing to move away.

“Did you think I was going to propose?” He playfully asks, raising a brow at you as he tilts his head.

“Well, yeah.” You shove him when he starts laughing.

“We’ve only been on a couple of dates!”

This time, you can’t help but join in with his laughter. “That’s exactly what I was thinking.”

Taehyung just smiles at you as he leans forward to rest his forehead against yours. You cup his cheek in your hand as you lean in to kiss him, smiling when he deepens the kiss. When you pull away, you open your eyes to find him already looking at you.

“I love you, Yn,” he says softly, tucking your hair behind your ear before leaning in to kiss you again. “I love you so much it scares me.”

“I love you too, Taehyung.” You lean away and laugh as you wipe your nose with the back of your hand. “But don’t tell Yoongi. He’ll get upset that I love you more than him.”

Taehyung just smiles as he kicks off his shoes and lies down beside you on your bed, holding his arm out for you. You smile as you curl up against his side, his hand running up and down your side and luring you back to sleep. You didn’t realise just how tired you were until you were in his arms and suddenly, nothing else mattered.

<Part 30 (x) Part 32>

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AN: I wasn’t sure what to put for the warnings, so please let me know if I need to be more detailed!

We only have one more part to go! Rumour Has It is nearly finished!

[therainroguefanfiction]

🔥 ℝise Ⱥbove I̾t ◈ Chapter 019 [Coming Clean]

📑 Table of Contents | ◂Backward

Word Count: 2,638

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

〈“If I could just control my mind, I wouldn’t need to run and hide. If I could show you all inside, then you would know what hell is like.” Nevertel, “Down”〉

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

“I really have gotten weaker. Back in my heyday, five hits woulda been enough to knock that guy out.” Toshi stood tall, his fist held against his chest. “But today, it took more than three-hundred mighty blows.” He paused, turning toward the remaining two villains. “You’ve been bested, villains. Surrender! We all want to get this over with quickly.”

Toshi, you’re running out of time, aren’t you? No, you’re already out of time. It’s faint, hidden by the dust, but I can see the smoke rising from his body. He’s pushing himself to the absolute limit.

“He… cheated…”

“What’s wrong?” Toshi taunted. “Not attacking me? Didn’t you say you were gonna clear this level earlier? Well, come and get me! If you dare.”

You’re bluffing out your ass, Tosh. I stepped forward, but a jolt of pain shot through my ribs. I can only use a little bit of power or I’m gonna risk losing control. Toshi’s body is shot… It’s taking everything he has to maintain that form right now. He’s pushing himself so hard, so goddamn hard to protect everyone, to keep true to the title of ‘symbol of peace’, but I can barely use my fucking power without risking everything. This is such bullshit.

My hand clenched around the handle of the dagger. Gramps… if you were here, what would you say? What would you do? Would you be proud of me? Disappointed? Angry? No… you were the kindest, gentlest man I’ve ever known. You would take me into your arms and tell me how proud you are because I did my best, right? But…

I’m not doing my best. I’m holding back because I’m scared. I’m so goddamn scared, Gramps.

“Man, this is… intense.”

“As I expected, there’s no reason for us to fight now, he’ll handle this.”

“Come on, Midoriya! We should regroup with the other guys! The last thing we wanna do is get taken hostage or get in his way.”

“You too, bitch. You’re hurt.”

I glanced over my shoulder at Izuku. He knows. He knows that Toshi is at his limit. He’s gonna do something stupid again.

“What, are you scared?” Toshi kept provoking them.

Tomura started to scratch frantically at his throat. “If only Nomu were here, he’d rush you right now. Pound you into the ground without giving it a second thought!”

Kurogiri leaned toward him, but I couldn’t hear what he was saying. The once unconscious villains are starting to wake up, too. Shit.

“I think All Might can hold his own against those two main guys. Let’s make sure these dudes don’t hurt anybody else!” Red declared, taking a fighting stance.

“Will you two be joining us?” Peppermint asked.

Just then, Tomura rushed at Toshi. “Consider this revenge for what you did to Nomu!”

My blood started to boil and I pushed myself forward, letting out a scream of pain and frustration as flames engulfed my entire body, propelling me forward. It hurts so goddamn bad. It’s too hot, I can’t control the temperature anymore! It’s all or nothing… there’s no going back!

There was a flash of green to my left. “Don’t you touch All Might, you stupid villain!”

A warp opened in front of him, Tomura’s hand reaching out for his face.

I can’t… control it anymore, but I… I…

“Dragon…” I felt the tattoo on my back come to life, shifting as its claws dug into my shoulder blades. I have to do this quickly. The flames around my body grew as I cocked my arm back, my fist colliding with the palm of his hand. His fingers clenched around my fist, the skin starting to flake off as he used his quirk.

“Young Jen, don’t!”

“…Unleash!!” A large blast of power shot from my hand, followed by a loud roar that shook the dome. The flames exploded, shoving everyone away from me as they morphed and molded into a flaming dragon. It slammed Tomura against the ground, splitting the concrete. “Pepper… mint…”

Darkness claimed my mind.

I blinked, finding myself standing in darkness. There was nothing around me, nothing but an inky blackness that stretched on and on. My skin felt hot, but my chest felt like ice. The pendant…

I tugged it from my shirt. It was glowing a soft white and felt like ice against my palm. What the fuck is happening? Where am I?

“That is the question, isn’t it.” A male voice echoed through the darkness.

I narrowed my eyes, turning in circles as I scanned my surroundings, but I couldn’t see anything. “Who the fuck are you?”

“You lost control of yourself.”

“Che. What the fuck do you know?”

“I know everything about you, little Winchester.”

“Care to fucking enlighten me?” I growled, my eyes snapping around.

“I’m afraid you’re not yet strong enough.” He paused. “I am unable to show myself to you unless you have full control over your power. Time is running out, little Winchester.”

“The fuck does that even mean?”

“You must get stronger and inherit the burden of your family. Only you have the power to stop Onodero’s return.”

“Hah? The fuck is an Onodero? And what fucking burden? Oi, answer me!”

But the silence rung in my ears. He didn’t answer me.

それ以上に上昇 ☆ Third Person

Todoroki’s eyes widened as her strained voice reached his ears, but he and the other boys were frozen in place at the flaming dragon that hovered above her body, roaring angrily as it set the world ablaze around it. Her body was covered in black flames, burning her skin and eating through her jeans.

She was no longer in control of her quirk.

Toshi cursed, his fists clenched at his sides. He didn’t have the strength to stop her and with Aizawa out of the picture… he didn’t know how to handle this situation.

Todoroki bit his lip as he remembered her haunting words, ‘If I lose control of my quirk… you gotta freeze my body, understand?’ He didn’t like the idea, but he saw no other option. His fists clenched as he stepped forward. Ice surged forward from his right foot, approaching her body at an alarming speed. The dragon noticed, breathing fire at the ice and beating its wings quickly, the gust of wind making him stumble backward.

His eyes narrowed as he lowered his body to the ground. ‘Sorry about this, Winchester…’ His hand swept around his body, sending a wall of ice barreling toward her. The dragon roared loudly, flipping in the air before dive-bombing straight into her body. She screamed in pain as the flames absorbed into her. The sound of glass breaking reached his ears as the shattered pieces of her tank top appeared around her, slowly molding together on her body.

Her body was smoking, skin bright red as she fell to the ground.

Tomura’s right arm was badly burnt. When he tried to stand, he was shot once in each of his limbs. The pros had arrived, but even they couldn’t prevent the warp gate from fleeing the scene with Tomura.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

My whole body is numb and I can’t move.

My eyes fluttered open, a barely audible groan passing my lips as light filled my vision.

“Take it easy, kid.”

That’s Snipe’s voice. I’m on his back?

His hands squeezed my thighs softly, a comforting gesture on his part. “Don’t worry, we’re gonna get you to Recovery Girl. You’ll be fine.”

I took in a few short gasps of breath, my body jolting from the pain in my ribs. “Is… everyone okay?”

“All of the students are fine, with the exception of Izuku Midoriya. He’s being taken to Recovery Girl with All Might.” He paused a moment. “Eraserhead and Thirteen are in more serious condition and have been rushed to the hospital.”

It took some serious coaxing on my part, but I finally managed to lift my arms to wrap around the front of his neck, my eyes stinging with unshed tears. “I’m so sorry… for not being stronger…”

He squeezed my thighs again. “It’s not your fault, kiddo.”

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

“Well, I guess I won’t scold you for him being back here since it wasn’t your fault.” Granny sat at her desk, her voice soft as she looked over the three of us.

“I’m not sure yet, but I think I shortened my time limit again with that fight.” Toshi was laying in the bed closest to her desk, his legs too long to fit the bed properly. “I hope I can at least still hold the form for an hour.”

“I’m so sorry…” Izuku was in the bed beside him, right under the window. An I.V. was connected to his arm, the soft dripping filling the room.

“Well, no use worrying.” Toshi sat up. “These things happen.”

I was lying in the bed across from Midoriya, the curtains drawn over the window. To be honest, I’m not really sure how I’m feeling right now. Helpless, maybe? No, that’s not quite it. I feel… confused as all hell. And I feel bad for Toshi. And Aizawa and Thirteen. Those three took the most damage because I wasn’t strong enough to help them. And then I lost control… I’m fucking lucky no one got hurt because of me.

The door slid open and a man in a trenchcoat entered, removing his fedora as he closed the door behind him. “Excuse me. Hi, All Might. Been a while.”

“What the hell?” Toshi spit up blood in surprise. “I didn’t know that you were investigating.”

“Woah, All Might! It’s okay he’s seeing you like this?” Izuku panicked.

“Huh? Oh yeah, it’s fine. This guy’s alright. Naomasa Tsukauchi. My best friend on the police force, he’s legit. I trust him.”

“Haha, that’s quite an introduction. Sorry to cut to the chase, but we could really use any information you might have.”

“Hold on, before all that. Tell me all the students are okay! And Aizawa – er, Eraserhead. And Thirteen.”

I pushed myself up, also eager for that answer.

“Not counting these two,” He waved his head toward me and Izuku. “The only student injuries were scrapes and both of the teachers are in stable condition right now. Relax.”

We all breathed a sigh of relief at the news. Zawa… I’m so fucking glad you���re okay.

“That’s good to hear,” Toshi responded.

“If you heroes hadn’t risked your lives, the students never would have made it. You three saved that entire class of kids today.”

My eye twitched in annoyance. Ex-fucking-cuse me? What the fuck are me and Izuku, fucking chop liver? I mean sure, we didn’t do much, but at the very least we acted as damn good distractions. I think I did a good job acting as a punching bag in place of those kids. At least give us credit for that, you bastard!

“You’re not seeing the whole picture, Tsukauchi. Those students also risked their lives. They fought as hard as us.”

“Thank you, All Might…”

“Yeah, thanks for rememberin’ us peasants!” I grinned, giving him a thumbs up. Izuku smiled at that, which was a nice change from the sad expression he’s had since he woke up.

Toshi smiled at us. “I don’t think there’s ever been a group of first-years who experienced a real fight like this so early in their training. They not only survived, they learned what it means to be a pro. Those villains made a mistake attacking them. This class is strong. They’re filled with courage and drive.”

Pride swelled within me at his words. Man, you can be so cool sometimes, Tosh! I exchanged a look with Granny and she sent me an encouraging smile, nodding her head.

“Mark my words; they’ll become great heroes.” Toshi gave us both a proud smile, giving us a thumbs up.

I couldn’t hold back the bright smile spreading across my face as I fell back onto the bed, hands folded behind my head. No matter what, I’ll keep getting stronger and pushing myself to my limit and beyond.

For you Gramps, and… for you, Toshinori.

⊱ ────── {⋅. 🔥 .⋅} ────── ⊰

I glanced at Toshi as he pushed open the door to Aizawa’s hospital room. He was lying in bed, both arms covered with thick bandages. His face was also covered, leaving slits for his eyes and nostrils. He glanced at us with tired, half-lidded eyes when we entered.

I smiled softly, stuffing my hands into my pockets. “You look like hell, Zawa.”

“I don’t even have the energy to glare at you right now.” He spoke, his voice muffled by the bandages. Toshi sat in the chair beside the bed, while I sat on the side of the bed, bringing my knee up and turning my body so I could face both of them. They were giving me their undivided attention.

I cleared my throat, focusing my attention on a loose piece of thread on my jeans. “During the Quirk Assessment test, I freaked out. I told you that I didn’t know why or what happened, but that was a lie. Dark Shadow, Fumikage’s quirk… he looks a lot like that damn warp gate, Kurogiri. The day that I arrived in this world… I had returned home to find Gramps on the floor, dead. Stabbed to death. There were two men there that day. That fucking dickbag Gravedigger, the one that looks like Golem that I fought – he’s the one that killed Gramps -, and Kurogiri.”

My hands balled into fists and Toshi reached forward, resting a bony hand over my own.

I took a deep breath. Damn it feels nice to be able to breathe without pain. “Kurogiri’s body filled the living room, it was all I could see as he warped me away from my home. When Shadow surprised me that day, something in me just… snapped. I saw the darkness again, and Gramps’ lifeless body flashing in my mind and I just… I dunno, I blacked out for a minute or somethin’. It sounds pretty stupid now, kinda childish…” I scratched my cheek. “Sorry for lying to you guys.”

“It’s not stupid, young Jen. It was a traumatic event, it makes sense that you wouldn’t want to relive it by talking about it.”

“I guess,” I leaned my head back to stare at the white ceiling. “He knew my name… Kurogiri. Said he came to take me back home. I have a feeling that I wasn’t meant to land in front of you, Tosh. I broke out of the warp, no fucking idea how. And during the fight at the USJ, when he scattered the students across the facility, he dropped me right in front of Tomura. The bastard said I look just like Alissa, said it in a real creepy way too. And then he said I may look like her but I don’t have her personality. Like, what the fuck is that supposed to mean? Bastard. He was also adamant that Gravedigger not kill me.”

The two exchanged a look and Aizawa sighed deeply.

“They were gonna take me, weren’t they?”

“Most likely, yes…” Toshi lowered his head.

“Why did he want me alive, though? You can’t get revenge on someone that’s dead. They went out of their way to find me in a different fucking world and bring me back here, but why? Just to kill me? That seems like a bit of a stretch.”

Toshi’s hands formed fists around his baggy pants.

“Tell her,” Aizawa grunted, closing his eyes.

I watched Toshi, but he refused to meet my gaze as he spoke up. “I wasn’t… completely honest about your mother.”

A drop of sweat rolled down my cheek. Oh, fuck me…

“While it is true that Alissa was a pro hero… she wasn’t always one. She… was a villain for most of her life.”

“A… villain?”

Bitch, huh!?

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[chiefnooniensingh]

I Won’t Hesitate (For You) Chapter 6

Chapter 6: I can’t breathe (until you’re resting here with me)

In this chapter: We get a peak at the night of the murder. In the present day, things kick into high gear and Alex faces a few of his own demons.

a/n: This is one of my absolute favourite chapters. I reread this so often after finishing it just because I love it so much. I hope you'll like it as much as me!

As always, a special thanks to Aileen (@acomebackstory), Callie (@callieramics), @hm-arn, @royalshadowhunter, @ladymajavader and May (@merlinss) over on Tumblr for their continued support and cheerleading. I don't know if I would've finished it without you guys!

The title of last chapter was Linger by The Cranberries, guessed by hmd23! Congratulations!

Can anyone guess this week's title and performing artist?

Also on: ao3

other chapters: 1 2 3 4 5

20th of October, 1953, somewhere between 3am and 5am.

Alex eyes snapped open. His heart was beating faster than it should, and for a moment he didn’t understand why he’d woken up feeling startled. Then it came back to him.

He’d been sure he’d heard someone yell out. The sensation had permeated straight through his uneasy dreams and had startled him awake. He scrambled for his pocket watch. 4:31am. Why in the world would anyone yell out in the middle of the night?

Half-groggy, but on high alert, Alex stumbled out of bed, his bad leg protesting heavily to the sudden weight put on it. Limping heavily, he made his way to the door, opened it a crack and peaked out. The corridor was dark and empty, the long-since extinguished lamps swaying lightly with the train’s movements. The certainty that he’d heard someone in distress fading with every passing second, Alex looked up and down the carriage. He looked down the long end, just in time to see a small figure slip into cabin number 4.

Perhaps that was all he heard; someone visiting the bathroom.

Deciding that his traumatized brain made a case from something that wasn’t anything, Alex closed the door, crawled back in bed and soon went back to sleep.

Present day, 21st of October, 1935

“Alex! Come in!” Maria DeLuca had opened the cabin door at his knock and her worried frown quickly changed to a lovely smile as she realized who was at the door. “My mother is resting; it’s been a very tiring day.”

Alex stepped inside the cabin, and indeed saw Mrs DeLuca asleep in her bed. “I’m sorry to disturb you, Ms DeLuca,” Alex said in a soft voice, as he took a seat next to the window. Maria took the seat next to him. “But I have some questions that I need answered.”

“Of course,” Maria said with a kind smile, “ask away.”

“Do you and your mother have identification on you?”

“Naturally.” Maria rummaged underneath her mother’s bed for a while, and produced two sets of identification papers, which he handed to Alex.

Alex copied all of it down in his notebook. “Maria DeLuca, 22 years of age, resident of New Orleans. Occupation…singer?”

“Quite famous, too! I’ve even got a record deal coming up! People line up for blocks to hear me sing every Mardi Gras.”

Alex nodded, slightly impressed. He resolved to look up some of her music upon returning to America. “Your mother’s name…Margaret DeLuca, resident of New Orleans, retired.” Maria nodded as she took the papers from him.

“I’ve seen her looking varying degrees of ill. Is there something wrong with her?”

Maria’s smile vanished abruptly. “We…we don’t know. She’s starting to lose bits of memories. Some days she’s as sharp as she used to be, then the next she’s convinced Rosa Ortecho is standing next to her, having entire conversations with her.”

“Your mother knew Rosa Ortecho?”

Maria nodded, tears filling her eyes. “The poor girl. My mom was the Ortecho’s house maid until a few weeks before the kidnap. My dad had gotten very sick and we had to move closer to a hospital that could help him, you see. When my mother read of the case, weeks after her body had already been discovered, something broke in her. She was still my loving mom, and she took good care of me even after my father died, but there was always a kind of sadness surrounding her.”

Motive, Alex wrote down, but in his mind, he doubted it. Mimi DeLuca was barely strong enough to lift a hand of cards, let alone plunge a knife into a man’s chest. Still, it was pertinent information. “How is it that you came to be on this exact train, the same train that the murderer was on?”

Maria looked desperately upset. “I don’t know! I’ve been trying to figure it out myself. The only logical answer is some cruel twist of fate!”

“And you don’t think you or your mother…?”

Maria’s dark eyes suddenly flashed angrily, and Alex saw, for the first time, that he was better off not underestimating this woman. “Are you suggesting I or my mother had anything to do with this horrid business? Because my mother is sick enough as it is, and planning a murder is certainly not on the top of our priority list!”

“Of course. I’m sorry I asked.” Maria kept her eyes narrowed at him for a while, and Alex felt another possibility for friendship slip away from him. But he wasn’t here to make friends, he reminded himself. He had to solve a murder. Whatever it took. “Where were you around 3AM, miss DeLuca?”

“Asleep. My mother woke at around 4 to request a glass of water from the conductor. I woke up briefly because of the scuffle, then fell asleep again. We did not hear about the murder until we arrived at the scene after everyone was already awake. I did not commit this murder, Mr Manes,” Maria said fiercely, “and neither did my mother. Frankly, I’m insulted you find us capable.”

Alex rose to his feet, having gathered all he needed right now and cast Maria a sad look. “Ma’am, in my line of business, I’ve learned that everyone is capable with enough motivation.”

With that, he left.

En route back to his own cabin, with every intention of having a lie down for a while, to really mull this case over, he ran straight into Michael. “Hey, you okay?” Michael asked once more, looking concerned this time.

I swear, Alex thought privately, this man is going to give me a whiplash. “This case is giving me a headache,” he said, instead.

“Can I help?”

“That’s very kind of you, Michael, but I – ” He was cut off by a sudden loud squealing sound, a violent lurch as the train suddenly braked hard and another crash as it came to a sudden stop. Alex, already very unsteady on his feet, fell right into Michael when the train started to brake, and the force of the crash caused them both to tumble to the floor. The noise was deafening, and instinctively, Alex buried his face in Michael’s chest and covered his ears. It was excruciating to listen to the screaming of the breaks, the thudding of luggage falling over all up and down the train and then the frightened yells and screams of the passengers.

And suddenly he was on the battlefield again. The air smelled of gunpowder, blood and death and everywhere around him, his brothers were dying. Alex was barely 20 years old and not in any way, shape or form prepared for the violence that was an actual war. Clinging tightly to his weapon, he waited till he heard the enemy’s fire subside, then emerged out of the trench and fired at his faceless foe. The more people died around him, the more he realized how futile it was. How many men had laid down their lives for the simple fact that the US government wanted control over Nicaraguan waters? But it was too late to turn back now. If he stopped shooting, he would die. And he did not want to die. He came up from the trench once more but had miscalculated. The next thing he knew, he was on the ground, his knee in tatters and every nerve aflame. Michael’s face floated in front of him as he screamed in agony. “Alex,” he said softly. Alex smiled and reached out. “Alex. Alex!”

“Alex!” he heard Michael yell, and he felt two warm hands grab his face and pull him up. Alex gasped for breath as if he had been drowning and the reality of today came back to him in an instant. He wasn’t at war. He was on the Orient Express, which had apparently just crashed, and he was in Michael’s arms once more. Though nothing romantic was about to happen, for Michael was looking at him in alarm, scanning his face for injuries. Alex automatically did the same. Other than being severely startled, having had a pretty serious flashback, and having developed an even worse twinge in his leg, Alex didn’t think he was injured. Michael looked shaken, but otherwise unhurt as well. “You okay, love?” Michael asked softly, running his thumbs down Alex’s cheeks. Alex nodded.

“What the hell was that?” he said, his voice extremely shaky.

“I think we crashed. Come on, let’s get you up.” Michael helped Alex to his feet slowly, and when Alex put weight on his leg, it hurt less than he had expected. Thank goodness.

People were coming out of their cabins, looking ruffled and wide-eyed and some of them spotting some minor bruises or a split lip. Everyone seemed unharmed otherwise.

Michael looked at Alex again. “You sure you’re okay?”

“Yeah,” Alex murmured, who still felt pretty shaken up, “I just…had a flashback.”

Michael’s eyes flashed with understanding, and without hesitation, he dropped the tiniest of kisses on Alex forehead. Just a brush of the lips, but Alex felt it and a warmth surged through him. “After this is over, we’re going to have to catch up,” Michael said with a half-smile. Alex nodded in agreement, not voicing his very real fear of having to put Michael in jail.

Jesse Manes came bursting in through the door, looking quite the worse for wear, his mouth bleeding profusely. It looked as if he had slammed his face into something as the train crashed. “Is everyone alright?” he asked to the crowd in general, and, not waiting for an answer, he continued, “I need Dr Vale!”

Kyle came hurrying forward with his med kit, looking harassed. Behind him, Ms Beth’s arm was in a bandage. Raising an eyebrow at Director Manes’ less than impressive visage, he opened his case and rummaged in it. “Hurry up, won’t you?” Director Manes snapped, obviously forgetting he was not in the army anymore.

“Dad!” Alex said loudly, as Kyle stopped what he was doing and looked up slowly.

“Excuse me?” Kyle said softly.

Jesse Manes stilled, only now realizing his mistake. “Oh, I am so terribly – ”

“Mr Manes, you might be the Compagnie director, but these people are your passengers, who have paid for your services and your hospitality. Now I understand this day has been stressful, but I will not permit anyone to speak to me in that tone. If I hear you speak to me or any of the people on this train in that way again, I can guarantee you will never find work this side of the pond again. Do I make myself clear?”

Alex’s mouth dropped open, and he felt Michael’s shoulders shaking with barely controlled laughter even as he was still supporting Alex. There was a very tense silence, in which Alex watched his father go through several emotions including ‘murderous’ before landing on forced remorse. “Of course, Dr Vale. I forgot myself, my apologies. It’s been stressful, as you said. If you would be so kind, would you mind helping me stem the bleeding?” He was still bleeding rather profusely, and with the public dressing down he’d just received, he made a very pathetic sight indeed.

“That was the best thing I have ever seen in my entire life,” said Alex in a low voice and Michael snorted.

“Karma is a bitch,” Michael muttered, causing Alex to cough out a laugh. He looked at Michael, those piercing brown eyes filled with mirth, and felt his heart skip a beat. The man was still holding him upright, even though Alex was sure his leg was able to support his weight.

Just like 10 years ago, Michael was there to catch him if he fell. It had taken them a shockingly small amount of time to fall back in sync with each other. Alex opened his mouth, unsure what he was going to say but wanting to talk, to touch, to really reconnect with Michael…but suddenly the outer door burst open and Beth screamed. Cold air blasted into the train, snowflakes bursting in from the cold and a large shadow exited the train into the snowy wild.

Without thinking, Alex took off.

“Alex, no!” he heard Michael yell from behind him, but Alex scarcely heard him. He was only vaguely aware of his leg protesting to this sudden sprint so soon after having taken the brunt of a very violent fall, but Alex had only one thought. Someone was running. The murderer was trying to escape.

It was freezing cold outside. Alex spared a glance to the front of the train, and his heart sank. They’d been about to pass through the Simplon Pass, but an avalanche had blocked the entrance; the Orient Express had rammed straight into the thickly packed snow.

They were stuck.

Alex’s gaze snapped around to the back of the train, where the escapee was still running. They were clothed in a big coat, making it hard to make out who this was. Alex tore after them, just as Michael jumped out to keep everyone else in. “Alex, be careful!” he yelled.

Alex called upon all the speed he’d built up in the army and sped up. No matter why this person was running, Alex couldn’t let them get away. “Stop!” he yelled, but it was useless. The wind was whistling around them both, and he only barely heard himself.

His knee protesting violently, Alex gave it everything he had and saw the distance between him and the escapee closing. The snowy landscape was hard to traverse, and they could barely see five feet in front of them, but Alex noticed the distinct change in landscape a few feet to the right; a ravine. And the other person was drawing very close to edge, Alex could already see snow beginning to crumble underneath their feet. “Careful!” he yelled. The other heard him, looked around, and lost their footing. “NO!” Without hesitation, Alex leaped for the person and pushed him away from the edge. The man – for Alex’d seen the glimpse of a beard – fell backwards, safely away from the edge, but Alex was less lucky. The snow was slipping underneath him, carrying him ever so slowly towards the edge. Oh, for the love of… He felt one foot already passing over the edge, and panic leapt into his throat. I don’t want to die, Alex thought frantically, as Michael’s face flashed before him, and he tried to scramble back up the slight slope.

“Mr Manes!” he heard, and the man jumped forward, trying to catch his hand. Their fingers touched, slipped and Alex began to slide in earnest.

“NO!” Alex was surprised that the yell hadn’t come from his own throat, but behind the man appeared Michael, like a god damn angel send from heaven. “Alex!” Michael lunged and grabbed Alex’s hand, just as Alex tipped over the edge. They both yelled in fear, but Alex felt a yank on his arm. Michael had gotten hold of him and had stayed his death a little longer. Not that it helped. Alex felt himself slowly falling again, and he saw the snow underneath Michael shifting again. Michael was slipping as well.

I’m gonna die, Alex realized. And he was taking Michael with him.

“Let go, Michael!” he yelled in a panic.

“No!” Michael looked panicked himself, but his grip remained firm as he tried to find footing. “And don’t you dare let go, Alexander Manes!” Then he directed himself to the guy behind him. “Grab my god damn legs!” he bellowed.

Alex couldn’t see what was happening. He stared up in Michael’s eyes, sure that if he was going to die, those were the last thing he ever wanted to see. “Michael,” he said softly, as he felt no change in his slow descent, “Michael, please.”

“NO!” Michael yelled, his voice cracking. “I’m not letting you go again, Alex! I don’t look away!”

“Michael, please!” Alex said, tears threatening in the corner of his eyes. “Please, don’t do this!”

Michael’s eyes were blazing with fury. “If you go, I’m going with you!”

“Oh, stop being so dramatic, you two!” a third voice added, and Isobel Bracken-Evans’s face appeared over the edge. “We got you, we’re pulling you up!”

And miraculously, even as Alex hardly dared to believe it, they suddenly began to rise, Michael disappearing back over the edge, but never letting go of Alex’s hand. Alex’s free hand grabbed the edge when he could reach it and two pairs of hands appeared to grab hold of his arm.

Isobel and Kyle were there, pulling him up, while Mr Otto was pulling on Michael’s legs.

His heart pounding, Alex was pulled back on solid ground, away from the edge. When finally, finally, they were safely away, he collapsed, gasping with adrenaline, against Michael, who caught him and wrapped his arms tightly around him. “Don’t ever do that to me again,” Michael muttered against Alex’s temple.

Alex could only clutch to Michael’s jacket tightly, pressing his face in his chest as he tried to stave of the beginnings of a panic attack. All the horrible things that could’ve happened were flashing before his eyes. His own bloody, mangled body two hundred feet below on the snowy plains. Michael’s broken, lifeless body next to him.

“Michael, are you okay?” Alex barely registered Isobel’s soft voice as he inhaled Michael’s scent in an attempt to calm himself.

“Yeah, I’m fine.”

Other footsteps. Several shocked voices as they took in the scene before them. Alex aware that he and Michael were being far too affectionate around a far too unfamiliar crowd. But he didn’t have the strength to push away and stand up. He’d been at death’s doorstep. And he would’ve never gotten a chance to tell Michael all he wanted to – to make up, to apologize. Ten years, wasted, because they’d been so scared and cowardly.

“Michael.”

“I got you, private,” Michael whispers softly, his hands stroking Alex’s back. “You’re safe, you’re alive, I got you.”

“You really wouldn’t have let me go?” Alex finally gasped out, looking up at him. The world was slowly coming back into focus, and Michael was at its centre.

Michael smiled and the last bit of panic faded from Alex’s system. “I never look away, Alex. I told you before. I just found you again. I’ll never let you go again. And if that means following you over the edge of a damn cliff, so be it.”

“Jesus, Michael.”

“What the hell happened?!” Another voice joined the murmurs and Alex and Michael both looked up, the spell between them broken. The world was freezing again and he was alive and there was still a murderer in their midst and his father just appeared, looking disgustedly down at Alex and Michael. Alex could only imagine that he looked like his father’s worst nightmare; broken, teary-eyed, in the arms of another man. If only Alex could bring himself to give a fuck.

“Alex almost went over the edge,” Isobel said, stepping in front of Michael and Alex with her hands on her hips. “Michael saved him. They’re catching their breath.”

Jesse Manes blinked in surprise. “Did they at least catch the person who ran?”

The silence became rather frosty, a very impressive feat seeing as it was snowing. “Yes,” another voice said, “they did.” Everyone turned around. Arthur Otto stood next to his daughter, who was holding his arm and looking extremely stern. “Why did you run, papi?”

Jesse Manes didn’t wait for an answer. “Only a guilty man runs! I always knew to never trust your kind and I was right! I’m going to make sure you never see the sun again, you murderous spic!”

Alex was on his feet at once. The exhaustion, the pain in his knee, all but forgotten. “Shut up!” he yelled. Jesse became very still, a stance Alex still recognized as a first sign of trouble. “You are not in charge of this investigation, Mr Manes! I am, and you will not threaten anyone on this train while I am in charge, or you will be very sorry indeed!”

“How dare you speak to me in that tone?!” screamed Jesse Manes, getting into Alex’s face, any sense of where he was and who was surrounding him forgotten. Alex didn’t back down. “I am still your father, you ungrateful, arrogant piece of shit, and I will have respect!”

“Respect is earned, and you have done nothing in my entire life to earn it!” Alex yelled back.

“You have never done anything to warrant giving you respect!”

Dr Kyle stepped forward, looking extremely angry. “Your son is a decorated war hero!”

Jesse Manes didn’t even seem to hear him, he just raged on, with the air of a man who was finally letting out what he’d been holding back for years. “You didn’t even have the decency to be normal, you had to be a fucking faggot to boot! You are disappointing, disgusting, despicable – ”

It happened in a flash. Alex was pulling back his fist to plant it firmly in the face of the man who called himself his father, but Michael had beat him to the punch – literally. Alex hadn’t realized how strong Michael had become in the ten years since he last saw them, but Jesse Manes went down with a single blow. Alex was convinced he saw a tooth flying. “You can no longer speak to Alex that way, not as long as I have anything to say about it!”

Jesse Manes looked shocked at this turn of events. He was cradling his jaw and Alex was looking forward to seeing a bruise form there in the next few days. He looked up at Michael, his eyes flashing with the same hate he always reserved for Alex. “My, my, you’ve finally learned to throw a punch. Lucky for you I didn’t get your good hand last time, huh?” His eyes flicked down to Michael’s left hand and Alex saw it spasm violently.

“You’re a fucking child,” Michael spat, his voice dripping with disgust and hatred. “You think respect and control come from violence. Yet these people, the people Alex is investigating for murder, respect him more than they do you. You are nothing. You have always been nothing. The only difference was that you were stronger than either one of us. That has changed. Touch either one of us again, and you will be very sorry indeed.” He stepped forward, his fist raised, and Jesse Manes flinched violently.

“Michael!” Max Evans stepped forward, looking stricken. “Enough, man. He’s got the point, I think.”

To Alex’s surprise, Michael dropped his fist, his fingers unclenching, a sharp breath exploding from him. Then he turned to Alex. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” Alex said, then immediately felt his knee give out. “On second thought, not so much.” He buckled and Michael caught him effortlessly. “Alright, now that that’s dealt with,” Alex said, casting a disdainful look at his father, still bleeding on the ground. “Mr Otto, I would like an explanation, if you please.”

Mr Otto looked extremely white from all the excitements, and his daughter nudged him hard in the ribs to get his attention. “Oh! Ah. Yes. Of course.” He cleared his throat uncomfortably. “Well, when the train crashed, I knew it was my only chance to get away…”

“Aha! See, escaping the scene of the crime…!” Jesse Manes began.

“I swear to God, one more word out of you…” Michael snapped, who did not finish his sentence, but Director Manes got the point. He lapsed into grudging silence.

“Yes, to get away. But not to flee the scene of this crime.” He looked at Alex intently. “I did not murder that man, Mr Manes. But I overheard your father talking to one of the other staff one day…said he could only suspect me, as I am the only person who could’ve done it; the DeLuca women and Beth being too weak, and Dr Kyle having taken an oath. I ran because I knew if it was up to Jesse Manes, I would be convicted on the word of a racist white man. And I’d rather live out here in the middle of nowhere than go to prison as a Latino man.”

Alex sent his father an absolutely hateful look, but his father seemed unremorseful in his racism. Alex could murder him. “Alright, everybody inside, to the dining carriage. It’s getting too cold out here. Dr Kyle, if you would escort Mr Otto.”

Everyone started towards the train, leaving Manes in the snow. Michael supported Alex all the way, and Alex was glad off it. His leg was aching worse than ever, and he was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to put his weight on it for a day or so. Michael carried him singlehandedly up the stairs and into the carriage, and they laughed about it for a moment, before continuing to the dining carriage, where it was, mercifully, warmer.

Beth was standing next to her father, her arms crossed, looking extremely cross with her father. “Alex!” she said, when she saw him, waving him over. He and Michael made their way to their table. “I want to apologize for my dad. He shouldn’t have run. He panicked, thinking Jesse Manes had maybe called in the cavalry to arrest him.” Next to her, her father nodded.

Alex sighed. “Look, I get it. My father is…yeah. But I have to consider all the facts…”

“Mr Manes, I swear my father couldn’t have done it. I was with him all night – ”

“Beth – ” Max Evans tried to step in, but Beth continued, without missing a beat.

“– after I came back from Max Evans’ – ” Alex registered Max relaxing slightly, “ – I was reading some medical journals for most of the night and checked on my father periodically because he has heart issues, and my father was asleep until we were awoken by Isobel, I swear!”

Alex glanced from her to Max for a second and saw their eyes jump to each other for a fraction of a second. Something was going on between the two of them, but Alex couldn’t quite put his finger on it. Beth’s story only barely held up under the lightest scrutiny. But even if she wasn’t telling the truth about seeing her father, at least her and Max’ story seemed to match up. And that covered her for the murder. His head was aching. He pinched the bridge of his nose and lights swam behind his eyelids. That couldn’t be good.

“Alex?” he heard Michael whisper.

“Mm,” Alex merely muttered. “Alright. Well, it seems that we are stuck here for a while. Nobody leaves this train without my supervision, is that clear?” Everybody nodded mutely. “Michael, can I have your master keys?”

“What, why?” Michael asked, looking startled.

“Because I’m the only one not a suspect in this case so I need those keys somewhere I can keep an eye on them, please, Michael.” He didn’t mean to sound desperate, but his vision was getting blurry, his head throbbing more and more by the second. He had to lie down, and soon.

“Alright,” Michael acquiesced, looking startled and handing over the keys. Alex limped towards the outer door, locked it, and put the keys in his pocket.

“Go to your cabins, everyone. I need to rest, and we’re not going anywhere for a while.”

People moved past him, murmuring and shooting him concerned glances. Michael stayed close to Alex, looking concerned. “Michael, can I speak to you for a moment?” Alex managed to say through gritted teeth. Without waiting for an answer, he limped towards his cabin and entered it, Michael following close behind.

“What is it – ?” Michael began, but it became very clear what. Alex nearly collapsed and it was all Michael could do but to catch him. “Wow! Alright, I got you, private, I got you.”

“Can you help me?” Alex asked, his voice weak and trembling. “I don’t – I don’t think I can – u-undress mys-self.”

“Of course, Alex. I’m right here, I’m not going anywhere.”

He helped Alex to his bed, set him down and started undoing the laces to his shoes. Alex slumped against the back wall, his eyes closed. Michael’s hands were gentle as he helped Alex out of his shoes, his socks, his pants and shirt. At any other time, the atmosphere between them would be charged, but Alex was near in a coma and Michael understood exactly what Alex needed. He helped him into his pyjamas. His soft touches lulled Alex into something resembling sleep and he felt warm and safe for the first time in a while.

“Alex,” he whispered, and Alex forced his eyes to open a fraction. “Lay down, love.”

With gentle pressure from Michael, Alex managed to swing his legs onto his bed and rest his head on his pillow. A very ungentlemanly groan passed his lips as his entire body began to ache into the mattress. Suddenly, Michael’s hands were on his bad leg, rubbing it softly, warming the aching muscles in his calf and knee. Alex hummed appreciatively and closed his eyes again. He slowly felt his body relaxing into Michael’s touches. His body was exhausted, the adrenaline from nearly dying finally wearing off and he was sure he was asleep. That is, until he felt Michael’s hands leave his leg and his lips against his forehead. “Sleep tight, Alex.”

Alex’s hand shot out, grabbing Michael’s arm as he made to leave. “Please don’t leave,” he muttered. His eyes opened slightly, looking up at Michael through his eyelashes. Michael’s face was soft, and a small smile played around his lips.

“Alright, Alex.” Michael shed most of his uniform, leaving him only in his boxers. Then he climbed into bed, settling himself behind Alex and slinging an arm over him. Alex’s eyes closed again, and he burrowed himself against Michael’s chest. Michael’s arm tightened around him, pressing a kiss to the back of Alex’s head. “Go to sleep, Alex. I’m here.”

Alex dropped to sleep faster than he ever had before.