#and remember all the fuckery that happens after that?!?!!

[deadfor7yrs]

yes i am Thinking about how little we knew at the end of tfc and Fearing the next two books in the tsc trilogy.

[mosquitinho]

went through the (by far) worst 2 weeks of my life but im still getting out of bed and trying to do things. Rare mental health win

[evilminji]

You think the Zone has its version of Comic Con?

Like? Think about it. You have literally all of time to work on it, your Magnum Opus, your life's work. That DREAM comic. All the supplies you could ever wish for. Endless paper. Endless ink. You can practice and practice for CENTURIES until it's JUST right.

Wouldn't you want to share it?

There are definitely Ghosts who have Obsessions that make them collect.

And two people meeting would lead to a group. Lead to a bigger group. Lead to a large group. A gathering. A crowd even. Eventually you need a Lair to meet IN. It becomes An Event.

People hear about it.

Want to bring other art mediums. Food stalls. Report on it. It grows. Shoot offs start happening. Niche meet ups.

But like?

Unlike comic con? It's all FREE. Sure, you might have fork over the ecto to make your copy. And yeah, weaker ghosts can only do that so many times. Will have to prioritize. But? They can come back after leaving for a nap. Ask a buddy to come with. There ARE work arounds.

Just? Imagine the unbelievable HIPE? Danny would feel? But be unable to TELL anyone about? Zone Con happens several times a year! Cause so many people wanna come. The Zone being infinite, after all.

Problem 1? They're using THEIR standard of a "year". Which is actual 5 earth years. So it's only happens every year and a half for him. And Problem 2? He can't even TALK about how excited he is about Z Con with anyone (outside his friends and family) because they haven't heard of it and might Ask Questions.

It's ALSO held in a part of the Zone that's like? Three days of flying away from the portal. And no amount of begging is gonna get any of his loved ones to camp in the Speeder for around six-ish days just to go to a Con.

So you can imagine his DELIGHT. His utter JOY and *Target Spotted* "!!!" Noise, when? In the crowd? He spots A HUMAN! Hi fellow human!!! Omg, wanna be Con Besties? *doesn't even wait for an answer*

So now? This sad, blonde, deeply lost and kinda alarmed, trench coat dude? Is Danny's new Z Con Going Bestie! You got a map yet, bestie? No? That's cool, he has one. By the way, he has human food in the Speeder if you nee-

YES!

Cause, see, here's the THING. John? Lost to the Realms Infinte. Or Infinte Realms. Translation was iffy... and on fire... like the rest of the building. It was him or the kids those psychos had kidnapped, for what fucked "ritual" the voices in their heads, that THEY thought were demons but frankly he's pretty sure was just feedback from-

Look, doesn't matter, he had to choose. He always knew someday he'd have too. That even twisting Luck and talking fast wouldn't quite be enough. And he had to decide, in that moment, which outcome mattered more to him. They get out safe, or he does.

Wasn't much of a question, was it?

So, there he is. Staring down oblivion and all those debts unpaid. 'Bout to see who's gonna come for him this time, and take what left of wretched soul. When? He bleeds on the FUCKIN two-bit crap circle they squiggled in God only knows what. Remembers that "oh YEAH, set dressings!" Sometimes when you focus too hard on insuring a Good Outcome?

You weird weird as shit byproducts happening on the side to balance it all out.

Or BAD ones.

He wakes up someone fucking green and crowded. For the life of him can't tell you which one it is. And THAT was of course, bout two days ago.

Biggest and most immediate problem? He... does NOT recognize what flavor of magical fuckery this is. Doesn't seem Fae. And doesn't smell like Hell. There are... there are honest to God BOOTH BABES hanging around. Hunks too. The view is LOVELY.

And nerdy.

Very, very nerdy.

But he isn't THAT out of touch. So he should recognize SOMETHING. Or at least the languages. But nope! It's like aliens and magic had a nerd baby and dipped it in GREEN. And the worst thing? Is there is food everywhere, but it all glows and John's not stupid enough to eat it.

Then? Sweet merciful fuck. Salvation! Some teeny bopper Barely No Longer Teen fresh faced INFANT of a Hero kid. With a SHIP. Who has FOOD and a clear idea of where they are. Hello~ John's new BEST FRIEND. Yes. Absolutely. Con Buddies, whatever.

Just feed me, kid.

Only? Once he inhales like 5 "Fenton rations"? He only gets half way through introducing himself before getting interrupted. Kid hears "magic" and "occult Detective" and just? Goes "oh! So you wanna check out the magic Ally with me? Sam wanted me to pick up some witchy stuff!"

..............how magic?

(In Which? Constantine becomes Danny's interdimensional Con buddy)

@the-witchhunter @hypewinter @hdgnj @mutable-manifestation @lolottes @nerdpoe

[cornfieldsrambles]

YOU HAVE PERMISSION TO INFODUMP PLEASE TELL ME ABOUT WIGGLY'S SIBLINGS???? THAT HE APPARENTLY HAS????

omg ok SO

Meet the Lords in Black. Charming, aren't they?

Yes, Wiggly does indeed have four brothers who all do different things, so I'll cover them one by one, in order of introduction (since we've already met each of them in Nightmare Time at least once). BTW Nightmare Time has a fuckton of lore in it that I won't go into here, so even though I am about to spoil significant parts of it for you, I do recommend watching it, it's really good and if there's enough interest they might make a third one!

(Also you might notice they're all in doll form in this picture. This is how we knew them up until NPMD introduced us to what I call their Tumblr sexyman forms. Which are rad as hell by the way.)

So you already know Wiggly. That little green fucker, Wiggog Y'Wrath, the Capitalist Cthulu who does uwu-speak and starts a cult by invading people's minds. This will become a bit of a reoccurring theme with these guys. He's also the only one to successfully start an apocalypse, and the only one to have attempted to birth himself into our reality. (Or is he? We'll get to that...) He does seem to have some kind of dominion over the other LiB, as whenever all five of them show up there's always emphasis placed on him, like in NPMD where he does most of the talking while his siblings occasionally butt in.

Now for Bliklotep. Blinky seems to have slightly lower-scale ambitions than Wiggly, but don't let that fool you. Eyeball Boi is still incredibly dangerous. He runs an amusement park, WatcherWorld, deep within the Hatchetfield Witchwood. But it's not for the amusement of the patrons. Oh no. It's for Blinky's own amusement. Once you step inside, every insecurity, every shred of potential conflict will be ripped to the forefront, turning people against each other to the point of trying to kill each other until he's fully infected their minds. It's implied that, if not all, but a significant chunk of the workers at WatcherWorld were once patrons before having their minds taken over by Blinky. He's also implied to be the thing in Trail To Oregon that Jack Bauer sees during his venom-induced hallucination, as Blinky is referred to as "The Watcher With 1,000 Eyes", which is exactly what JB says he sees? Making Blinky the only LiB to induce a Starkid crossover. My headcanon is that the Dikrats founded Hatchetfield. But regardless.

Next up on the roster is Tinky. T'noy Karaxis, the Time Bastard. You may be wondering about that one line in NPMD where he recognised Pete as a Spankoffski, and said he "could have the whole set in his toybox". Has Tinky gone after Pete's relatives?

Well. Um. You know Ted, right? Yeah, his name is Spankoffski. He's Pete's big brother. We actually got the surname reveal before the brother reveal, lol. And that's not the only reveal we got about Ted. Our boy Teddy Bear has this whole entire tragic backstory and it turns out he gets fucked over in literally every timeline! Isn't that fun?

So, to summarise an entire episode: Tinky makes travel fuckery happen, Ted wants to go back in time to fix his life, accidentally goes back to before the time machine was created and gets stuck in the past, literally. Tinky is watching and laughing at the whole thing, then shows up to blow Ted's brain to smithereens with his weird little magic box, the Bastard's Box, where he stores all the people he toys with. Anyway Ted eventually catches up with the present by aging, except now no one knows who he is, he's... actually I won't spoil that. But once he dies he ends up eternally trapped and tortured in the Bastard's Box. Yaaay.

Fast forward to Nightmare Time 2 and we get introduced to Nibbly, in possibly the most unexpected way imaginable. He's revealed to have been behind a whole episode literally right at the end of said episode, and even though it was kind of foreshadowed, it hits you like a freight train in the best way. Remember when I said Wiggly was the only one who tried to birth himself into reality? That was kind of a lie. Nibblenephim can sort of do that anyway. Every year, he can possess a bunch of carcasses and create a living form to walk the earth for one night. He also has a cult of followers who provide him with the carcasses, as well as a sacrifice to feed on. There's a little more to it, specifically with how the sacrifice is chosen, but again, I'm trying to spoil as little as possible. Go watch Nightmare Time. Nibbly also seems to have a "pig" motif, and his theme song, The Nibbly Ditty, is a banger, easily my favourite of the three LiB theme songs we've heard so far.

And finally, we are introduced to Pokotho, in the very last episode of NMT2.

Except no. We were formally introduced to Pokey there, yes, but we've seen his apocalypse already. Long before NPMD, before Nightmare Time, even before Black Friday.

Yeah, remember me saying that Wiggly was the only one to successfully start an apocalypse? That was also a lie! Pokey already did that, and he did it without ever showing his masked face. Remember The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals? The blue spores that came down in a meteor and turned everyone into singing zombies? That was Pokey's doing! That's his blue spores! That's his apocalypse!

This also provides an explanation for why blowing up the meteor didn't work. Emma and Hidgens were right about the hivemind thing, but wrong about the location of the central brain. It wasn't the meteor - the meteor was just the vessel which carried the spores to Earth. The central brain was sitting safely up in the Black and White, laughing as Paul blew himself to smithereens. The central brain was Pokey, the Singular Voice, the most uncompromising of his brothers. The one who hates every voice that is not his own, hence the hivemind and making all of his zombies speak in HIS voice.

Anyway in NMT2 he's happily collecting musical zombies by taking on a human form and infiltrating a fighting ring of superpowered children until he has enough to kickstart another apocalypse. (Don't question it, we're almost done). He also calls himself Otho, not Pokey, making him the only LiB to have two different abbreviations of his name. Hannah is also there (remember her? Lex's little sister?) and she is like incredibly important to this whole thing, she has a super powerful mind, but that's a whole other thing.

But I did mention Hannah for a reason. Because you said "Wiggly's SIBLINGS". And while the Lords in Black are always referred to as brothers, they do have one more sibling. A sister. A Queen in White. And her name is Webby.

Yep, Hannah's imaginary friend isn't imaginary, who could have guessed? She's benevolent, always trying her best to combat her brothers' antics, but given that there's one of her and five of them, this is a bit of an uphill battle. Webby doesn't have a full name that we know of, nor does she have a doll. We don't know much about her. And she may not be all-powerful - but then again, neither are her brothers.

Infodump concluded. Hope this helps, it was very fun to write.

[prettyboykatsuki]

cw for ; cheating like really bad cheating dskfsk, mind games, bisexual reader (its relevant!!!), emotional sadism, yandere in the most uncomfortable flavor, and sexuality fuckery.

readers gender is intentionally left neutral!!. @p00pdev1l tag for my beloved.

You can feel yourself starting to cry again.

You have a headache. The noise of the izakaya is flooding out into the streets. Even with alcohol and cigarettes and other distractions, you can't help but feel like you're about to throw up. The dry-heave works itself up to your throat, and you smoke a little to shove it back down.

You were careful this time.

When you hear footsteps walk themselves next to you, and see nice black dress shoes from your gaze is downcast - you already know it's Suguru.

You feel yourself getting sick again. Your voice is hoarse, scratchy with pain and tears. You're unimaginably angry at him, and you're sure if you were a little drunker, you'd take your pocket knife to his throat.

But the words don't come. You're so frustrated you just ended up crying again, hiccuping. Something falls onto your shoulders, a jacket that smells like cologne.

That wakes you up, makes you turn your head to one side. Your heartbeat is hard and loud, and your anger is the only thing in your body. Your seething, all hard lines and rage.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

He shrugs. "It's cold. You'll get sick."

"Don't act like you give a single fuck about me, you psychopath."

His reaction to that is cold. Makes your blood run cold. "Call me whatever you want but don't say I don't care about you."

"Fuck off, Suguru," The feeling of his name is intimate in the same way knives are. Sharp against the roof of your mouth because of the smooth way the syllables slice. The familiarity of a cut. "Go inside and fuck off. Go be with..." Your words trail off.

"I'd rather be out here," He assures, then shrugs. He joins you in smoking, but you turn your gaze back to the pavement so you don't have to look. "She'll be fine without me."

There's a lot of things you don't understand about him. What you understand least though is this. How long has it gone on? How long did he plan on doing this?

The first time Getou stole the girl you loved from you, you're nearly too heartbroken to stay friends with him. It was your first real crush. A girl in the same year as you. You loved her. She smelled soft like roses and put her head in your lap. You managed to confess to her despite yourself at the end of your second-year.

She was your friend, still - even as she let you down gently. Told you that she had a boyfriend now. He was your friend, actually.

The first time it happened, you thought about cutting your ties with Getou. He didn't pretend to be apologetic to you, said she was cute and he liked her. He didn't say he was sorry.

Instead he said: "You shouldn't be with a girl who could get over you so easily." And leaves it at that.

You almost got physical with him, you remember. Gojo stopped you.

Over the years, the incident becomes pattern enough to recognize. The first is a mistake, the second a frustrating coincidence. The third time it happens you do get into an altercation. Each time Getou confronts you he says the same thing. That if a girl really loved you, she wouldn't been with him so easily. If a girl really loved you, she shouldn't have been so easy for him to persuade.

You think abut killing him. It's so frustrating, so humiliating, so painful it nearly puts you in therapy. The fourth time in happens, you try to cut him off but you can't. Your lives are so tied together you can't avoid seeing him and for whatever reason he can't leave you alone.

When there's no one you're interested in, he's your friend after all. That's the strangest part. The part that makes the least sense, that he acts like your fucking friend when he does that to you but he does it again and again and again. It hurt less when it was just puppy crushes. Eventually you grew numb to it. Gave up on love for a while.

When you meet Mikoto, you don't make the mistake of showing your interest. You especially don't show it around Getou. On the job, a sorcerer from a branch in the Nara prefecture who's recently moved. A nice woman with black hair and soft eyes, you seek her friendship first and don't let yourself indulge in anything more.

You don't dote on her more than friends. You don't show your feelings off. You don't tell anyone, not even Gojo whom you tell everything, or Shoko - who you tell when you don't want Getou finding out. You bury the feeling of love in yourself and hope they die there. You hope she ends up with anyone but you, or you in some miracle.

You fall in love with her because it's who you are. Getou shows up with her at your gathering the minute you begin to accept it.

If he doesn't hate you, it must be something much stronger. Disgust or pure disdain. Something stronger than hate must drive him to do this so perpetually.

It's not even something you can tell anyone. What do you tell girls before you go out with them? What do you say to people when they ask why you and him act so odd?

There's nothing to say. Nothing to explain. It's so fucked up that you wouldn't even know where to begin.

Your voice is trembling as you take another drag of your cigarette. "How did you know?"

He laughs a little. "You make it obvious."

"Why do you keep doing this to me...?" You ask, defeated. Broken, maybe. "....I really loved her."

Getou shrugs again. You can tell even if you don't see it. "She was the same as the rest of them. I'm doing you a favor."

"Do you even like her?"

He takes a drag of his cigarette and looks at you a little longer than you expct. "So-so."

"I hate you," You give up on everything else, letting your cigarette fall to the ground. Your voice is shot. "You're fucking horrible. Just leave me alone. Please, please just leave me alone."

There's a minute of silence there. He stamps his own cigarette out and sighs. "You should come in. You'll catch a cold." You don't reply. He sighs again. "I'll buy you a drink."

You break down in tears all over again.

When you're in highschool, you date Satoru for a week.

Suguru remembers this. It's one of the only things about his highschool experience that feel standout. A defining moment of his youth, where the two of you try it just because everyone says you should and neither of you really like it. You end up being friends again, laughing it off after it happens.

But he hated it.

There was a pit in his stomach the entire week. Even though you barely dated, and only really held hands as a joke - Suguru hated it. You kissed Satoru too, you confessed. He was a decent kisser, but you didn't feel much.

It was a joke of a relationship. Still.

He remembers too, the first time you had your first real crush. Up until then, you'd really never thought of anyone else. There was no one for Suguru to care about. But he remembers exactly when it happened, and where - how the four of you were slacking off in the storage room, passing around Shoko's cigarette. He remembers the way you got embarrassed telling them about her. How you could barely keep the smile off of your face.

The first time Suguru steals someone from you, it's during highschool. It wasn't because he had really wanted her. He hated her. Hated how she smiled at you and hated how innocently she spoke. But when he stepped closer to her, she blushed.

It was to get her to fall for him. And that wouldn't do, he didn't think. How could you like someone with so little resolve? When she couldn't be even a little loyal to you?

He asked her out on a whim that time. But he saw how angry it made you. How your eyes were wet with tears and how much you hated him in that moment.

How much you thought of him. Have you ever before then? Considered him so much? Suguru didn't think so.

It becomes an obsession, Suguru can admit. It didn't really matter who it was, though it'd been mostly girls. Anyone you showed interest in. Anyone who caught your eye. Suguru got their first and you always, always looked so miserable about it. Like a puppy who can't get on a couch, he thinks.

He prefers when you've already been with them. He prefers knowing that your skin has touched theirs. The parts of you that linger in their life become Suguru's so wholly. When he can smell your scent and taste your cigarette smoke. It'd be better if it was you, but there was something gratifying in this.

In the roundabout ways of finding you. Of seeing pictures of you in their phone, or of tasting you. It's like being with you, even though it's never enough. Always wants to make him break you more.

He likes when they cheat on you with him. He likes when it's just after. They get some cheap thrill out of it. Suguru can entertain it even if it disgusts him.

It's the only way your shirts end up in his closet. The only way he can smell your new shampoo so deeply because you share it. They think that he must hate you. He's sure you think that too.

But that's not it. He couldn't hate you. All the people he's ever fucked, he's tried to find evidence of your intimacy with them. Kiss marks he didn't leave on their skin, clothes they don't own, music they wouldn't normally listen to. You would. They're all yours.

He'd ask about you to them. Often. Listen to the parts of yourself that you'd been trying to keep secret from him.

He'd take it all by force and discard them all afterwards. That was all he wanted. You were all he wanted.

He liked seeing you angry with him. Liked seeing you cry and weep. Liked that you couldn't go anywhere or love anyone without thoughts of him following you and haunting you.

Satoru thinks he should just ask you out already. Suguru doesn't think he's broken you down enough. You need it to hurt a little more. You need to think of him a little more until you can't love anyone else.

Suguru wants to see you hurt a little more. Until you're so broken you're really begging. When he brings her with him today, you react even worse than he could have hoped for it. He shivers a little thinking about it.

He's getting closer to really breaking you, he thinks.

He looks at you now as he puts out his cigarette, broken from his thoughts.

"You should come in. You'll catch a cold." You don't reply. He sighs again. "I'll buy you a drink."

Suguru turns around to leave after he says it. Goes back inside. Before the door of the izakaya closes again, he can hear the way you sob so desperately.

He smiles at that. Just a little.

[blueskittlesart]

ok apologies for lurking but in 2022 (!!) you wrote an answer to a question about AOC and in it you wrote that in BOTW link does not choose zelda over his duty to the kingdom and in AOC he chooses her over his duty. iirc (I don't) the calamity stuff in botw is only through diary entries etc....... how do we know that in botw he doesn't choose zelda (genuine question my botw copy is not with me rn :( )

ok i don't remember saying that exactly, but what i DO remember saying and what i'd continue to argue today is that AOC link made the choice to favor zelda over his duty much EARLIER than botw link, and that is the reason he was able to subvert his fate and remain alive to defeat the calamity in his own time. before the calamity hits and the time-travel fuckery really starts in aoc, it's implied that what we're witnessing is near 1-to-1 with the events that happen pre-calamity in botw, with a few key differences. The major difference is, of course, the existence of terrako, which sort of has a butterfly effect. Most importantly, terrako's initial interest in Link has him and zelda interacting much more closely much earlier on in the story. at the time that link and zelda meet and interact in AOC, link is a simple hylian soldier. he has either no rank or a very low rank, he's taking orders from captains and engaging in battle on basically the same level as every other solider. the first battle in the game is implied to be one of the first times he really grabs his superiors' attention with his skills in combat, specifically by taking down those moblins basically on his own. because he is the first one to run across terrako, he and zelda are given a reason to interact before either of them know what is in store for them, so their relationship has a foundation that is not built on the baggage and animosity that comes with that. In botw, in contrast, it's implied that the two of them never interacted without that baggage. what we know of their past is admittedly scarce, and most of it comes from zelda's diary. the first page reads:

After meeting with the Champions, I left to research the ancient technology, but nothing of note came of my research. The return of Ganon looms—a dark force taunting us from afar. I must learn all I can about the relics so we can stop him. If the fortune-teller's prophecy is to be believed, there isn't much time left… Ah, but turning over these thoughts in my head puts me ill at ease. I suppose I should turn in for the night. P.S. Tomorrow my father is assigning HIM as my appointed knight…

already this timeline is incongruous with what we see in AOC--in the botw timeline, link is not assigned to be zelda's knight until AFTER the champions have all been found, whereas in AOC, he accompanies her to meet with each one of them:

Lamenting the kingdom's plight, King Rhoam sent his daughter to gather pilots for the Divine Beasts. Alongside Link--whose brave conduct had earned him a role as her knight--Zelda would meet with the four candidates.

In later pages of her BOTW diary, zelda makes repeated reference to link as wielding the sword that seals the darkness, and in link's own memories he never interacts with her without it on his back. I'd wager that in the BOTW timeline, he is not appointed her knight until AFTER he has the sword. (this also accounts for the way she talks about him being appointed in her diary--she'd have no reason to be upset about it if she didn't already see him as being ahead of her in terms of prophecy progress.) This is important because this percieved slight on zelda's part colors every bit of their interactions in botw--they both percieve the other as standoffish and haughty, and thus it takes them an INCREDIBLY long time to actually communicate healthily with each other. In fact, the only time we REALLY see them communicate receptively with one another in botw is during the sanidin park memory, which is days if not hours before the calamity actually strikes. In AOC, in contrast, link and zelda behave much more like equals if not friends from the very beginning. Their interactions are of course still colored by their respective ranks, and Link is still obviously suffering from the communication issues that come with his mutism, but they very clearly have a better understanding of each other from the getgo because the foundation of their relationship was built before they knew the extent of their destinies in connection to one another.

All of this lays the foundation for the climax of their story thus far--the night of the calamity. we know how this goes in botw--Link and zelda, woefully underprepared and miles from hyrule castle, race desperately to the sanctum. it's implied that they get all the way to actually fighting calamity ganon, and only when they realize that they can't win does link take zelda's hand and run. By the time they get to fort hateno, link is ALREADY majorly wounded from their failed attempt to quell the calamity, so when he turns to face those guardians, both he and zelda know that there's no way he'll win. It's important to note that the guardians at fort hateno never actually hit link, zelda stops them in their tracks before they're able to fire, but he collapses anyway due to his previous wounds. he was already mortally wounded going into that battle, and no matter what zelda did at that point, he was always going to fall there.

In AOC, however, the story is different. the calamity comes while link and zelda are in the castle, and rather than attempting to fight it, link makes the decision to take zelda to safety immediately. Because of that choice, when we get to AOC link's "grave danger" moment with the reanimated blights, he is able to survive. the major story beats still play out the same way--confronted by an ambush of incredibly powerful enemies (this time the reanimated blights) which he likely cannot defeat on his own, link attempts to fight anyway to protect zelda, despite her protests. Zelda, terrified for link's life, reaches out to him and her power instinctively activates to save him. the difference is that, while aoc link likely couldn't have survived that fight without zelda's interference, he had no pre-existing wounds because he was not coming straight from another impossible fight. So in AOC, when zelda's power destroys the blights, link is unwounded and able to remain standing. there is no impossible decision to make regarding his life, and, crucially, he remains alive to seal calamity ganon in his current time now that zelda's power has finally awakened. None of this would have been possible had he not chosen to flee the castle during the initial strike instead of attempting to fight a losing battle anyway, and THAT is a decision he was unable to make in BOTW because, at the time of the initial strike, his fear of failure still outweighed his love for zelda.

[driftward]

Let's talk about Zoraal Ja.

So early on in Dawntrail, shortly after Krile's first Echo off of Zoraal Ja, I was like, we are going to find out there is something fucked up happening to this guy. Maybe there's actually an Ascian in there purposefully fucking things up, or whoever the big bad of the expansion turns out to be rewired his head somehow, or, you know, some flavour of brain fuckery.

But as we go through the story and ultimately see him at his defeat, no, nothing so extreme as all that. He seems to be just Like That, and I thought it odd. By all accounts, it seemed he must have been raised okay. Gulool Ja Ja seems to have been an alright father figure, good enough to have raised two other kids into decent adults. They have their own sets of issues, but nobody's perfect, and they both do a good job course correcting for their shortcomings.

What the hell happened with Zoraal Ja? Why did he turn out the way he did?

Gulool Ja Ja is a blessed sibling, which we are not just told are exceedingly rare - we are shown so, explicitly, and we learn what the cost of a blessed sibling is to the Mamool Ja. A cost that their people bore in order to try to better their lot and win a war against the Xbr'aal. Gulool Ja Ja did not so much win their war as much as he simply ended it, bringing peace to both peoples.

That peace is simply, however, not that old. When we visit Iq Br'aax, we slowly learn the story of how that peace came to be, but throughout it, I could not help but notice that we were only getting one side of the story. The celebrated meal of Xibruq Pibil was meant to be a symbol of bringing peoples who were historically enemies together, but where were the Mamool Ja to share it with? And why did none of the Mamool Ja present seem to know how to create the recipe?

There is a peace, but here we see that it is a flawed peace. In the side quests, you learn that trade happens between the Mamool Ja and the Xbr'aal, but only in secret. The younger generation knows peace, but the older generation is still cagey about the not all that distant history with their neighbors in the forest.

And so the Mamool Ja still continue their practice of enduring the terrible loss of so many stillbirths in an attempt to create more blessed siblings. Their culture, especially the remnant that chooses to remain in the forest, is still trying to make its place in the larger world and improve their lot. They are still living in a land that makes for harsh conditions for living.

And in this we see a few things. One, Gulool Ja Ja is not perfect. He did a good job, but not a great one. The work of peace is going to need to be an ongoing project. And two, I believe it sets the foundation for why Zoraal Ja is the way he is.

He was not raised in Mamook, but he is still Mamool Ja. And like Gulool Ja Ja, he is a miracle. The trueblood son of a blessed sibling, who were long believed to be sterile. We don't know anything about his mother, and I suspect she had little influence on his life. But judging from the way the fight against him goes, and the visions we see of the people in his life, he may not have had a mother, singular, but I think he definitely had nursemaids.

And they certainly remembered what life was like in Mamook. And that history is not so old. And so early on, he is told he is special. He is told he is destined for great things. And probably, at least a little bit, there are whispers of how he might surpass his father one day.

The seed of a terrible imposter syndrome is planted.

And none of what happens requires Gulool Ja Ja to be a bad parent. In fact, I think what we get is the result of him trying to be a good parent. It seems likely he probably met his kids where they were at, encouraged their interests, and let them be who they wanted to be. Wuk Lamat probably sparred with him, and certainly got his sociable, outgoing tendencies. Koana, quiet Koana, I like to imagine he expressed an interest in sciences, and knowledge, and Gulool Ja Ja probably made sure he had the best tutors, and when the time came, made sure he had a good send off to Old Sharlayan.

And quiet, taciturn Zoraal Ja who rarely speaks. I can imagine Gulool Ja Ja let his son keep his peace. He probably assumed his son wanted his space, and left him to it. And Zoraal Ja, the miracle, watched his father. His father's living accomplishment was peace in Tural. Zoraal Ja will bring peace to the entire star. Gulool Ja Ja loves a good fight, enough that he challenges people to come to the palace and face him. Zoraal Ja will be a better fighter than his father. Gulool Ja Ja was a leader. Zoraal Ja is the leader of the Landsguard, and will succeed his father as Dawnservant.

It's interesting, I think, to compare and contrast Zoraal Ja with Bakool Ja Ja, who are more alike than they are different. Both are miracle children, both are impossible children. The Mamool Ja thought that a child born of Hoobigo and Boonewa was impossible - until the birth of the first blessed sibling. And they also believed a blessed sibling, in turn, was sterile - until the birth of Zoraal Ja, the miracle.

And both of them, I think, are carrying the weight of their people with them. Bakool Ja Ja explicitly, but I don't think Zoraal Ja got to escape it just because he was raised in Tuliyollal instead of Mamook. Even if the aforementioned nursemaids did not explicitly put the idea in his head that he might be the future of the Mamool Ja, he is not an idiot. They definitely told him he was a miracle, destined for great things.

And absent guidance from his father, who probably just wanted him to be his own person, he decided for himself what those great things would be.

Zoraal Ja is intent on completing them alone - to his ultimate detriment, in the trial in Mamook.

And while they are so very similar, the difference between Bakool Ja Ja and Zoraal Ja is that Bakool Ja Ja not only never wanted this, but he was eventually offered a path out. A way to be free of the yoke of the responsibilities his culture put upon him before he was ever even born. But Zoraal Ja never got that chance, because his burdens were not being forced upon him. He took them upon himself.

And he carried them until his death.

In the end, Gulool Ja Ja was probably a decent father, but not the right kind of father for Zoraal Ja. Zoraal Ja's ambition was born of a terrible inferiority complex that he nursed until it festered and swallowed him whole. He could have found his own freedom, but he could not see it past the shadow of his own father, who he was obsessed with eclipsing.

And so we're left with this. Zoraal Ja died in a completely avoidable tragedy of his own making.

[vorecaptions]

Oh, Danny boy, I heard you wanna leave the team? Really? After all that happened? After all that you achieved? You are the best of us Danny, you are our captain, bro.

When you entered the team you weren't more than one of those fucking nerds, remember when you were scrawny as hell? All that changed after coach gifted us some of his power, and Danny boy you were the most starving of us, the way you chugged every drop from coach balls that night... you alone got the essence of an entire jock just for yourself. You were the greediest of us all, you would only let us feed from coach when you had your fill, and that took a lot. Coach even said that he had to travel to the next state to hunt down good enough prey so that no one would notice and link so many gym goers vanishing... Danny boy you were so hungry for more power that your body ended up absorbing more than essence and nutrients from coach, you even infused yourself with his dna...

Not even coach did know you could make a pred from his seed alone. And yet you were still hungry, you wanted way more than coach could give you alone. You started to hunt by yourself. That's what happened to Dylan, right? You weren't satisfied with a devoted cum dump, you wanted all of him to submit, his muscles, his balls, his strength, his fucking cock. You took it all!

But all of a sudden you get some waning conscience screaming at the back of your mind and decides to stop being this way. Danny boy, it's like coach said, you sold your soul to the devil, might as well reign in hell. You are the best and worst of us all Danny, you are our motherfucking alpha. You are the leader of a fucking predator's pack man, even coach recognizes it.

You can't leave us, you can feel us and we can feel you, we are bonded! So stop this fuckery and let's go back inside the frat, there are some prey left and sorority girls to be bred, man up, dude. Time to go back to you duties, those wombs won't be filled by themselves.

[hello-eden]

Due to time fuckery, consider! A universe where Danny is reincarnated to multiple(or even all!) of the bat kids moms/mother figures. Catherine, Janet, Talia, Mary(I can’t remember others right now off the top of my head so let’s throw in selina for fun)!

Like he’s just out here with sort of duplicates of himself maybe no idea what’s going on in their heads until some event catches up and all of his memories rejoin. Does he take one body? A new one? does he shift between forms depending what he’s doing, or who’s he’s scolding? who knows? All I do know is that this could end in Bruce/Danny and the kids being like “you’ve slept with how many of our moms?” Lots of soft feels tho too for the kids who haven’t seen them in a while and like Danny finally having a single set of memories with all of his babies

I don’t know this is a mess and I wrote it vv quick but an interesting idea I think! I love your work<3

most have died and the afterlife time isn't linear. Danny being on the good side of whatever person helps with the reincarnation so they're like let me just reincarnate you close to the heroes and forget to turn it off after the first lifetime so it keeps happening.

Talia gets their Memories Back a little bit after they send Damien to go live with their father and realize that all of their past life children are living with this one man that they had a kid with in this new life. When all of the kids realize that Talia is The Reincarnation of their mom  it's going to be very awkward.

[actualbird]

for funsies, i made a timeline of luke's past (aka everything notable Before main story route/personal route timeline divergence fuckery)

some interesting things i noticed while i was making this

i checked, and there really is no instance in canon where it was mentioned exactly how old luke was when his parents died. the closest thing i had to a clue was the general sentiment that they died when he was young enough that he didnt have many memories of them. however, that could still be any young age because 1) idk abt you but i barely remember anything earlier than the age of 10, and 2) there is a possibility that luke blocked off those memories due to the trauma of loss and grief

the duration of time between when he arrived in central and when he got recruited to the NSB is not specified but all references i found of the events imply that they happened VERY CLOSE TO EACH OTHER, LIKE, SHORTLY, PROMPTLY. meaning luke was 16 when he was recruited. Pain. that is Just A Boy

there's probably a way to reverse-math-equation what year the Toxic Gas Incident and Luke Acquiring His Illness happened, but im not smart enough to count. however, given the nature of his illness, those events mustve happened somewhat close to his return to stellis, because he wasnt given that long of a lifespan prognosis after he acquired his illness

there is an unidentified amount of time where luke had already returned to stellis but did NOT reunite with MC. this is referenced in SR A Star in The Palm (and again later on in a recently released CN server card), but it's not mentioned anywhere exactly how much time he spent hiding from her. my guess was that it was a few months, maybe

conclusion: man, luke's late teens to early twenties were horrible. he shouldve been at the club

[silentglassbreak]

Here we are, folks. The long, highly anticipated Part 2 of Can You Feel My Heart... I told you all I had a surprise for you, didn't I? Well, naturally, I wasn't lying. This piece of work was actually not written by me... Rather, it was written by the Smut Master herself, @notyourmomsromancenovel. After much discussion and careful consideration, we decided this story is going to be a series with an undetermined number of parts, every chapter bouncing between her and I. I'm going to warn you now, friends, we're going to get dark with this one... Now, without further ado...we sincerely hope you enjoy. xo -Glass & Romance

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: angst, crime?, smut, rough sex, bondage, kinks (slapping, choking, etc.), mild violence, gut wrenching fuckery that will have your jaw on the table.

Taglist: @iloveyoutodeathbutimdrowning @shilohrosechicken @jilliemiw86 @wasteddoubts @raspberrywatermelon @respectfulrebel @guacinyourarea @sydinhiidef @amelia-acero @runadaggerthroughmychest @foliosgirl @anything-more-than-human @ooh-whatever-nevermind @poisongirl616 @theanarchymuse95

I hope I got everyone on the taglist, but if I missed you - let me know!

Silence Speaks

The toothbrush fell from my open mouth and clattered in the sink loudly. I frantically hung up and tried the call again, fingers shaking as I held the phone to my ear.

“The number you have reached is not in service. If you feel you have reached this message in error, please hang up and try your call again.”

No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. This can’t be right.

I thought back to our night together. The confession he made about his feelings toward me. The sex. Falling asleep together. The way he whispered to me as I fell asleep. Nothing about this is adding up.

I take a deep breath, close my eyes and try to clear the panic that is threatening to close in on me. I can feel my fingertips start to tingle, my ears are starting to ring. It feels like I can’t breathe and I know I’m on my way to a full blown panic attack if I don’t calm the fuck down. In through the nose, out through the mouth. One breath at a time. I can do this.

What the actual fuck is happening here?

My eyes fly open as I remember the last thing I heard Noah say as I drifted into unconsciousness.

“I’m so sorry. I wish things were different…”

I feel the bile make its way up my esophagus leaving me just seconds to make it over the toilet before I’m throwing up what little I could get down after the concert last night. Tears sting my eyes as I heave over and over again, with nothing left in my stomach but dead butterflies.

I lay my head against the cool toilet seat as I spit the last of the vomit from my mouth. Tears flow freely into the water, snot leaks continuously from my nose and I don’t even bother trying to clean myself up yet.

What’s the point anyway? What’s the point of anything?

My mind spirals to a dark place, wishing to be anyone but me. Losing Noah the first time was hard and took me years to recover from, and that was before he admitted he loved me.

This time...

This time might kill me. 

I hear my phone start to ring and my heartbeat picks up thinking it’s Noah. He’s got an explanation for why his phone was turned off, maybe a crazy fan got ahold of his number and he had to change it so he just got a new one. I scramble away from the toilet over to the corner, where my phone landed in my haste to not get vomit all over my bathroom sink. 

A picture of a smiling Ray and me at Knott’s Scary Farm last year looks up at me, and I think I might throw up again.

I let the call go to voicemail and sit on the ground, knees drawn up to my chest, arms wrapped around them, and lay my head down. I feel numb, light, like time means nothing anymore. 

I hear a text notification come through once, twice, and then another phone call. As soon as that phone call ends, a text comes through again. 

I groan and pick my phone up, intending to turn it off and pretend I don’t exist. I’ve been sitting like this for twenty minutes already, and I have no intention of moving any time soon.

As I swipe down the notification bar to power off my phone, I see the texts from Ray.

Ray: Hey babe, you good? You don’t usually call like that without saying something first.

Ten minutes later.

Ray: Babe? Raccoon if you’re alive or I’m going to show up at the house. I’m worried and I know you’re not asleep.

Ten more minutes before the final phone call and the last text.

Ray: Mkay well I’m on my way, see you in 15.”

I lean my head back against the cool wall. Fuck. How do I get Ray not to come home? I shoot her a quick text.

Me: Hey babe, I’m good. I think I might be coming down with something though, I don’t think you should come home. I’ll text you later.

My phone starts to ring and I see the picture of me and Ray. Double fuck. I fight for my life to sound semi-normal as I answer the phone.

“Hey.”

Not doing great so far.

I hear Ray scoff into her headphones, “Yeah, that’s real convincing. Here’s the deal, I’m already on my way so you can fuck right off with your sick act. We’re practically soul mates and I know something is up. Unlock the door so I don’t waste time with the key. I’ll see you in 10.”

I don’t even get a chance to respond before she hangs up. There’s no chance in hell I can hide this from Ray once she’s here. I’m going to break down the second she walks through the door, so I send her a text.

Me: Bring the Stella Black and some ice cream.

Almost immediately, I get a response,

Ray: Bringing the shovel too.

I almost smile.

I get up and unlock the door, returning to the bathroom to brush my teeth for the second time this morning while I wait for Ray to get here.

Two big bottles of Stella Black, a pint of Ben & Jerry’s Phish Food, a pint of Rainbow Sherbet and an entire box of Kleenex later, and Ray was caught up. We sat in silence now on my couch watching Scream, the original. 'Something happy' she said as she put it on. I was barely paying attention.

By the time we learned Billy Loomis and Stu Macher were the killers and I hadn’t laughed once or mimicked the way the actors were saying things, Ray turned it off with a sigh. She turned to me and took one of my hands in hers. 

“Babe,” She started. I looked at her as she continued. “I know this sucks, I mean really fucking sucks, but you have two options here.”

I just blinked in response.

“You can let this consume you - eat you alive like you did before. Or you could enter your villain era. Show him what he walked away from, what he’s been missing out on all these years. Fuck him and his band.”

“My villain era?” I questioned.

Ray smiled. “It’s not like we don’t know when he’ll be here again, or when he’ll be close. We can show up at his show and...I don’t know, throw tomatoes at him or something. Or boo him when he comes on stage? That would make you feel better, right?”

The gears in my head started turning. A villain era might be nice. A little side of crazy to keep him guessing. Show him that he fucked me over and used me for sex for the last time.

I felt a smile spread across my face as I answered. “Yeah, I think that would make me feel better, babe.”

As long as things didn’t get out of hand.

Seven months is a long time to plan revenge when you think about it. It gives you plenty of time to plot, come up with ideas, change them, scrap them for new ones, all in the hopes of executing the perfect way to get back at someone. And I have it now. Once I was done with Noah, he’d never even think of anyone but me.

This was how I made him pay for his actions.

Unfortunately, there had to be some collateral. Tyler and I split the day after Noah left. I confessed immediately to cheating on him and I was so numb from the after effects of Noah’s departure, I didn’t even have it in me to cry over Tyler. Watching him quietly sob while processing my infidelity should have broken me, but I had nothing left in me, at the time, to offer him the reaction he deserved. I should have had more remorse. More tact. Shouldn’t have been so blunt. 

“I fucked Noah Sebastian.”

No apologies, no tears. Just stating facts. 

“Y/N, we should talk about this.”

I sat staring at him without saying another word until he left.

Tyler never spoke to me again, not that I can blame him. He wouldn’t like what I was planning anyway.

Sitting at a hotel across the country in New Mexico, I wondered if I was really doing this. I took a deep breath, in through the nose, out through the mouth. There was no backing out now. Hotels were already booked, tickets were bought. New Mexico, then Arizona, followed by Oklahoma, and ending with Texas. Five shows. Four cities. That would be plenty to get my point across. I thought about going to Sick New World in Las Vegas, but tickets were pricier than I would have liked and a festival didn’t have the same intimacy I was looking for. 

I checked my phone to see a message from Raylene.

Ray: Hey babe, just checking in. Let me know you made it to your mom’s!

I sent back a quick -

Me: Made it! The flight took a lot out of me, I’m gonna crash for the night, I love you.

It was way too early for bed, but not if you factored in being jet lagged like I claimed. Besides, I wasn’t going to bed, and I wasn’t at my mom’s in Florida. I was in Albuquerque getting ready to head out to the first concert to enact the revenge I so desperately needed. I felt a quick stab of panic for not telling Ray what I was doing, or where I really was.

What if something happened to me? I was alone in an unfamiliar city, after all. I swallowed the panic as I had every time I thought of these moments the last seven months, and instead I focused on the rage I had for Noah. I focused on making him pay for all the hurt he caused.

Doors were at 6PM with I See Stars starting at 7 as the opening act. After their set, Invent Animate would play theirs. I figured I had about three hours from the time doors opened to Bad Omens going on stage.

Easy enough.

I waited out in the lot in my rental car as I watched the crowd start to go inside when they opened the doors. Minutes ticked by as the crowd got smaller and smaller. Soon, there were only a few stragglers left as late comers hurried to enter the venue before the bands went on.

It’s now or never.

I glanced over to the fenced area that contained the buses for the bands. No security. Perfect. A small venue like this probably didn’t have the manpower to house security outside as well as inside for the concert. I double checked the alarm I had set on my phone and got out of the car before I could change my mind. 

I walked as quickly as I could over to the side of the building where the buses sat while trying not to draw any extra attention to myself. Getting over the fence was the hardest part, but I managed with just a couple of muttered cuss words. Spotting the bus for Bad Omens was easy, as it was the biggest one there.

“Show offs.” I muttered under my breath and walked at a brisk pace to close the gap between me and the bus. 

I shrugged the backpack I carried off and placed it on the floor, crouching next to it and looking both directions before unzipping it, pulling out my first weapon of choice; spray paint.

Red, of course.

I shook the canister, willing the can to stay quiet and began spraying the side of the bus. Letter by letter, I covered one whole side of the bus in spray paint. Once I finished the sentence, I stood back to get a good look. 

My heart was racing with adrenaline, and I could feel the maniacal grin plastered on my face.

NOAH SEBASTIAN IS AN ASSHOLE

Childish? Sure. Satisfying? Fuck yes.

Up next, the inside. 

I walked up to the door of the bus and tried it. Unlocked. 'Cocky', I thought.

I made my way up the steps and closed the door behind me. I froze in my spot, awe-struck by the luxury this bus had.

It was a shame I was going to ruin it.

I reached in my backpack and grabbed another can of spray paint; black. I looked around. Driver’s seat to my right. Nothing to really do there. To my left was the living area with a pull out couch, a loveseat, a coffee table, and a TV. Just past that was the kitchen area which had a fridge, stove top, microwave, and dining table. Beyond that, behind a closed door, were what I assumed to be the bedrooms and bathroom. I’d save those for last. 

The spray paint got used up first. Black and red X’s painted various parts of the living space. A couple of 'FUCK YOU’s were written on the fridge and the TV. I pulled out my pocket knife next and went to town on the couch and loveseat, gouging holes in them, stabbing them dozens of times each. It was gratifying, watching the stuffing fly around as I unleashed all of the pent up aggression I had for Noah on these inanimate objects. 

I took a deep breath and admired my handiwork so far, noting the destruction the boys would walk into after their show. I might have gotten carried away as the TV lay broken on the floor, but the end result was the same. I was starting to feel better.

I made my way toward the back of the bus and opened the door leading to the bedrooms. It was easy to tell which was Noah’s, the last one on the right with the Bring Me The Horizon posters lining the walls above his bed. I knew I was running out of time so I wouldn’t be able to savor this as much as I’d like, but it was more important than everything else that I get this done, so I would get it done as fast as I could.

Just as I stepped into the room, I heard footsteps stomping on the stairs to the bus, and the doorknob began to turn. My heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest as I closed Noah’s door quickly behind me and dove under the bed. 

“What the fuck?!” I heard Noah’s voice scream as it echoed throughout the bus. 

Folio wasn’t far behind as he said, “Noah hurry up we’re about to go-” His voice cut off as he stepped onto the bus. “What the fuck?!”

Nick’s voice carried from outside as he chuckled, “What are we what the fuck-ing?” Followed quickly by, “Oh, what the fuck?!”

I guess they must have missed the writing on the outside of the bus with the sun having set, making the inside of the bus the first thing they saw that I had done. 

I was panicking. This was not supposed to happen. I was going to be out of here thirty minutes before they went on, and no one would ever know it was me. Trying not to hyperventilate as I hid under the bed became my biggest priority. I had to focus on calming down because I couldn’t hear the boys over the sound of my own blood rushing through my veins. Deep breaths, slowly. In through the nose, out through the mouth.

Their voices came back as I began to get control of my breathing. 

“... would do such a thing?” Nick asked incredulously.

“.... call the cops.” Folio was saying over Nick. 

The two of them continued talking over each other before Noah shushed them. “Did either of you or Jolly leave the door to the rooms open?”

Oh, fuck.

Everything got deathly quiet. My heart was beating loud enough that I’m sure all of them could hear it at this point.

I could hear their footfalls getting closer to the hallway. The door to the far left was flung open, banging against the wall. A moment of silence passed as I assumed Jolly’s room was cleared. The door next to it, next to Noah’s, crashed against the wall as one of the boys opened it harshly. Another beat of silence as they cleared Nick and Folio’s room. Noah’s room was next. I knew I had mere moments before that door crashed open and they found me in here.

My fingers began to tingle. My breath came in short gasps. I could feel my heartbeat in every inch of my body. The door slowly opened. The boys knew this was the last room. If anyone was still on the bus, they were in here.

Double fuck.

I could see two pairs of shoes clearly from my position under the bed. Noah’s Converse at the front, Nick’s combat boots right beside him, and beyond them I could make out Folio’s Docs. They took slow, deliberate steps into the room, making sure there was no one to be found. I was seconds away from giving myself away before they ever even got the chance to see me. I held my breath, trying to slow my heartbeat that I just knew was echoing throughout the bus.

“Hey guys,” Folio whispered from the doorway. “I know you’re obviously in the middle of something, but we have to go. We need to get ready on stage. We’re going on in about thirty minutes.”

Noah cursed under his breath as he gave up his search before getting the chance to check under the bed. He let Nick walk ahead of him as both of them turned to leave the room.

Oh thank fuck. 

Saved by the bell. I never thought I’d be so happy to know they were about to go on stage. Now I just needed to wait until they got off the bus and were heading into the venue before I got the fuck out of here. 

The door began to close behind Noah as I thought about what Folio had just said. They had to be on in about thirty minutes.

I’m so fucked.

No sooner had the thought crossed my mind, my alarm began to blare out of my phone signaling it was 8:30PM. 

In a panic, I tried to silence my phone before they heard it, scrambling to get it out of my jeans pocket and hit the snooze button. I was so busy trying to quell the noise, I didn’t hear the door open again, nor did I hear Noah crouch down in front of the bed. And I certainly was taken off guard when he grabbed a handful of my hair and began to pull me out from underneath his bed.

I dropped my phone, alarm still going off, and grasped at his hand in my hair, trying to get some reprieve from the pressure. I sucked in air through my teeth at the pain, and tried to gain traction with my shoes against the carpeted floor to delay the inevitable. After a few moments of struggling, Noah was able to get my head and arms out from under the bed. As if on cue, Nick and Folio each grabbed one of my hands and pulled me the rest of the way out. 

Once I was fully out from underneath the bed, Noah snatched me up onto my feet by my hair. He looked at me with anger, followed quickly by recognition, then confusion, before settling back on anger. 

He let go of my hair just long enough to grip my neck and throw me against his wall. “Y/N?! What the actual fuck?!”

I wrapped my hands around his wrist as his fingers dug into my throat, uselessly trying to get some air.

Folio placed a hand on Noah’s shoulder, “Hey man,” He started. “You've got to let her breathe.”

Noah’s hand loosened just enough for me to gasp in a breath of air that ended in a sharp cough. “You can breathe, so you can talk. I’ll ask again. What the actual fuck?”

Noah’s voice was calm, low, deadly. I’d never seen him like this, but I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of talking, not when he couldn’t give me the satisfaction of an answer to his transgressions. Instead, I just stared defiantly at him.

“Fuck, man,” Nick said, hands running through his hair. “We've got to go dude. Like, we've really got to go.”

“Cancel it.” Noah didn’t even glance back at Nick as he said it.

Nick physically flinched at the tone of Noah’s voice. 

Folio tried next. “Noah, seriously. We can’t cancel less than thirty minutes before the show. We have to go.”

I wasn’t sure if they were trying to convince him to leave for their benefit or mine, but I was grateful either way. The look in Noah’s eyes was terrifying, but it was also causing heat to pool low in my abdomen, and I had no interest in unpacking that feeling, so I needed him to let me go and leave.

As if he could read my mind, he sighed and turned back to Nick and Folio. “Fine.”

I could have cried.

“Grab me the rope from the utility closet. We’ll make her nice and comfortable, and then we’ll go play our show.” Noah looked back at me. “She can answer my questions when we’re done.”

Well, fuck.

An hour and a half passed while I sat there tied up. The longest hour and a half of my life. I assumed they would be back quicker, but apparently having a hostage tied up wasn’t a good enough reason to hurry things along.

I was laying on Noah’s bed, wrists zip tied together with rope connecting the zip ties to the bed. My feet were spread, each being tied to one metal post by rope. Of course, Noah got sick of me mouthing off about what a dick he was so there was a bandana in my mouth, tied around the back of my head.

“You’re so pretty when you’re bound and gagged.” Noah had whispered into my hair as he finished tying the knot behind my head.

I had shuddered, and I’d like to think it was from revulsion, but my body had other ideas.

That was then, though. Me and my body were on the same wavelength now. We were pissed. He had kept me here for far too long. I was irritated, my wrists were sore, and I had to pee. I swear the people being kidnapped in the movies never have to pee. 

I had half a mind to wet myself in Noah’s bed, just to see his reaction when he came back. I had almost talked myself into it when I heard the bedroom door open. 

Looking over, Noah stood silhouetted in the doorway, one hand on the doorknob and the other on the door frame. He looked out of breath, chest heaving rhythmically. I just glared at him.

“Oh good, you’re still here.” He smirked. “I’m going to go take a shower. Wash the funk of the show off me. Then, we’ll talk.”

I was screaming beyond my gag, which was pointless as he had already shut the door and started the shower. What an insufferable asshole. Being riled up again made me completely forget about my full bladder as I thrashed around, which really only made things worse for me. 

By the time Noah emerged again, shoulder length hair dripping onto his shirtless chest and a towel wrapped around his lower half, I was exhausted. My wrists were throbbing, my throat hurt, my mouth was dry, and my ankles were starting to burn from where the rope rubbed them. He looked like a pornstar, and I looked like a mess. 

I watched Noah reach into his dresser to grab a pair of gray sweatpants and a black tank top. Then, he turned and faced me, and dropped his towel.

I wish I could tell you I looked away - or at the very least closed my eyes - but I didn’t. My gaze quickly fell to the towel as it came unraveled from around his waist, and then locked intently at what it was covering. 

As if he had all the time in the world, Noah bent forward and slowly began to put on his sweatpants, and I followed his every move until he tucked himself inside of them. His shirt was on much quicker, but I couldn’t help but notice how much drier my mouth seemed after watching his arms flex as he pulled it over his head. 

Noah slowly prowled towards me, a fire blazing in his eyes, and I couldn’t tell if it was lust or hatred that was behind them. 

Once he reached the bed, he dropped to his knees beside me and untied the bandana from behind my head, letting his fingers graze my cheeks as he removed it from my mouth.

“Are you ready to talk?”

“Go fuck yourself, Detective Asshole.” I spit. “This isn’t an interrogation for me. It should be one for you.”

Noah looked amused at my remark. “For me? I didn’t realize I was the one that had broken into my own tour bus and vandalized it. You realize you caused tens of thousands of dollars in damages right?”

I had realized that, but hearing it said out loud made me feel small. “I’m aware of what I did, Noah, but are you?”

“Tell me, Y/N, what did I do?”

All those months of anger, all those months of planning, all the pain - it came down to this right here, this confrontation. It wasn’t happening as I had expected it to, but I’d take what I could get.

Just as I had begun to formulate my verbal attack against him, tears welled in my eyes, and the first word I tried to say turned into a sob.

Noah’s face fell. The hardened criminal persona I had tried to portray crumbled as the hurt he had caused washed over me. 

“You...” I had to pause as the sobs wracked my body. “You left me, Noah. You broke my heart. Not just once, but twice. You broke my soul. Shattered it and left me in pieces. And then you came back into my life, just to give me a second of hope. Of happiness. And then you stole it away. You took everything I had to live for. You took every chance I ever had of loving anyone ever again. You were it for me, Noah. The only thing that kept me going day in and day out, and losing you the first time, I had to learn to live with only half of me.”

Tears flowed silently down my face as I continued. “Leaving me the last time? You took the rest of me with you. The damage I’ve caused to your bus is the smallest glimpse of the pain you’ve caused me. It doesn’t even scratch the surface, and you deserve so much more for what you’ve done!”

I watched as tears tracked lines down Noah’s face. I watched as the fire he had when he came into the room was smothered. I watched as the boy I fell in love with, the one I knew all those years ago, resurfaced. Gone was the hardened Noah Sebastian. This, this was Noah Davis; the love of my life, my soul mate, my reason for being. And I watched as he crumbled as he realized how badly he had hurt me.

“Y/N, you don’t understand.” He started, choking up and having to clear his throat as he continued. “I had to.”

“You didn’t have to do anything, Noah.” I couldn’t back down now. “You could have let me in! You could have let me love you. You could have done anything except fuck me over, but you’re selfish and it’s all you know how to do. All you’ve ever done is shut out anyone who got too close. I don’t even think you know what the meaning of love is at this point.”

He looked so broken, his eyes mirrored the pain I had been feeling these past seven months. “I couldn’t bring you into this life, Y/N! Not like this. I changed, I was different, there was no way you could ever want who I became. I was saving you from me!”

There it was. The reason Noah left. He was trying to save me from him?

“Noah, that’s not your decision to make! You should have given me a chance to decide for myself if I could be with the person you became. Spoiler alert, I can! I love you, Noah Davis. With every fiber of my being and every inch of my soul. There is no one else for me. Why can’t you see that?”

I watched as realization dawned on him, watched as he realized how big of a mistake he made, and it was almost satisfying enough to make up for everything he did to me.

“Oh, fuck.” He whispered. “I fucked up. I fucked up worse than I could have possibly imagined. How could I have been so stupid?”

“All I’ve ever wanted was you, Noah, in whatever version of yourself that you are. It’s just you.”

He lowered his forehead to mine and closed his eyes, “What can I do to make this up to you? What can I do to begin to earn your forgiveness? You’re all I want Y/N, if you’ll still have me.”

I shut my eyes and tried to think, my mind working furiously to try to come up with something, anything to say. This was going so far differently than I had ever imagined, but maybe it would have the same outcome?

“You could start by untying me?” I asked softly, and even I heard the seductive edge in my tone. 

Noah’s head snapped up, and he reached up to undo the rope that bound my zip tied wrists to the bed. He stopped short, though, glancing at my face and then running his eyes down my body to where my legs were spread, tied to his bed. He took his time staring before slowly meeting my gaze again.

There was that fire again. 

“I don’t know.” He stood then, and I looked to see his growing erection pressing against his sweats. “I did say you were so pretty when you were bound and gagged. I meant it.”

I felt wetness at my core and desperately tried to rub my thighs together, anything to get some friction where I desperately needed it. I hadn’t had sex since that fateful night with Noah all those months ago, and I was definitely feeling the effects of that loss now. 

 Noah’s eyes glanced at my thighs, and a grin spread across his face,

“Do you like the sound of that? Does my girl want to get fucked while she’s tied up?”

I could only whimper in response, but Noah took that as all the invitation he needed to push his sweatpants down, freeing his erection. He slowly stroked his shaft, once, twice, making sure my eyes were watching his hand as he worked himself. I could feel my breath quicken as I licked my lips, desperate to feel him. 

“Would you like a taste, princess?” I nodded and locked eyes with him as he moved closer, lining his cock up with my lips. I gently licked his tip, where a bead of precum had formed. This caused his head to tilt back, which gave me the opportunity to wrap my mouth around his head, using my tongue to caress the base of his cock. 

He pulled away from me, and I whined at the loss of him. “Not so fast,” He chuckled. “I’m in control here, isn’t that right?”

“God, yes Noah.” I groaned.

“That’s a good girl." He stated as he lined himself up with my lips again. “Are you going to let me fuck that pretty mouth of yours the way I want?”

“Yes.” I whispered against him, and as soon as my mouth opened, he forced his cock inside, slamming all the way to the back of my throat. I gagged harshly, and he used the momentum to shove even further down my throat, cutting off any air supply I had and making me try to jerk back reactively. 

His hand wrapped tightly in my hair. He held me down, face flush against his stomach, as my throat worked to swallow his entire length. 

He moaned above me. “Fuck Y/N, you feel so fucking good gagging against my cock.”

He held me down another few seconds before giving me reprieve, and I gasped in air as he pulled back. 

“You’re such a fucking good girl.” He muttered as his free hand lightly caressed my cheek. I savored the gentle touch for a moment, eyes closed before he pulled away. I had just a second to mourn the loss of his hand before I felt him smack me, just hard enough to surprise me.

I gasped at the contact which gave him another opportunity to force himself down my throat. He continued relentlessly fucking my throat until it felt raw. Tears were streaming down my face and my makeup was far from ruined. His hand remained tight in my hair, causing a soreness to build on my scalp.

After what felt like an eternity, but was likely no more than fifteen minutes, Noah removed his cock from my mouth and his hand from my hair. I took in big mouthfuls of air, luxuriating in being able to take full breaths, in comparison to the small reprieve I had earlier.

I focused on calming my breathing, in through the nose, out through the mouth. Same as always. 

Noah looked down at me hungrily. “Ready for more baby girl?”

“More?” I croaked.

A dark chuckle escaped him as his hands reached for the button on my jeans. “We’re only getting started.”

Getting my jeans down far enough proved to be a very un-sexy task filled with a lot of curses from Noah as he tried to figure out how to maneuver them down. He settled for untying my legs one at a time, and pulling each pant leg off before tying my legs to the bed posts again.

Once he had me repositioned the way he wanted me, he nestled himself in between my legs, looking up at me briefly before clamping his mouth around my clit, his tongue circling it relentlessly. My back arched off the bed and a moan that sounded more like a scream escaped my lips.

“Fuck, Noah.”

He hummed with his mouth still pressed against me, causing my body to convulse at the sensation. It had been far too long, and I was going to come long before he was finished, I just knew it.

As if he had read my mind, Noah slipped a finger in between my lips, teasing at my entrance before plunging first one, and then two fingers deep inside of me.

“Oh, God!” I groaned, feeling the orgasm building low in my abdomen. 

He curled his fingers inside of me, reaching up to the spot that he knew would have me coming undone in seconds. His fingers worked inside of me, and his mouth worked at my clit, guiding me closer and closer to the edge. Not a minute later, my orgasm crashed into me, a scream in the form of Noah’s name leaving my lips.

Noah’s mouth and fingers slowed as he coaxed the last of the spasms out of me, and I came down from the high of my orgasm.

I looked down at him as he withdrew his fingers from inside of me, making eye contact as he licked them clean, which caused another shudder to run through me. 

“Fuck, you taste amazing, princess.” Noah pulled himself up, pushing himself onto all fours and crawling up towards me. His mouth hovered over mine as he whispered. “Would you like a taste?”

I didn’t get to answer before his mouth was on me, and his tongue was dancing with mine. His hand reached down between my legs and his fingers made contact with my sensitive clit, making me groan beneath him.

I felt him smile against my lips. “Sensitive, sweetheart?” I could only whimper in response.

He continued circling my clit lightly as I fought against the restraints,

“Please, Noah.” I couldn’t take it anymore. 

“That’s right, princess. Beg me.” His fingers left my clit, granting me my request. 

I had enough time to sigh in relief before his cock slid deep inside of me. He pushed into me as deep as he could before pausing, a tremor running through his body. “God, you feel so good baby girl.”

My hands itched to run through his hair and I longed to rake my nails down his back.

This was what torture felt like. 

Noah rose up onto his knees, his cock never straying from inside of me and began to fuck me. This wasn’t the awkward sex of our youth, or the passionate lovemaking of our young adulthood. This was raw, fiery fucking. 

The slap of his skin on mine was deafening, nearly drowning out my screams of pleasure. 

“That’s it, Y/N. Take all of me like the good girl I know you are.”

Noah leaned over me and placed his hand over my mouth, “Take a deep breath, love.”

I glanced at him, begging my eyes to come into focus to try and make out what he was asking me to do. I took a deep breath just seconds before his hand inched up to cover my nose along with my mouth. His other hand snaked around my neck and began to squeeze.

He began to pound into me harder, and I tried to gasp against his hand and the pressure on my throat. I felt my lungs begin to burn and my eyes widened in panic. I started to thrash against the restraints, but fuck I was so close to coming. 

Just as I thought my lungs could take no more, my orgasm hit me like a ton of bricks, and Noah removed both of his hands causing the blood to rush back into my head, and giving my orgasm an extra boost that had me screaming his name over and over.

Noah leaned back again, cock thrusting deep inside of me and never losing stride as his thumb started to circle my clit again.

I was so far gone that it was no longer too sensitive to touch, and I was on my way to chasing another orgasm.

Noah could tell I was getting worn out. “Just give me one more, baby. I know you can.”

“Please, Noah.” I didn’t know what I was begging for any more. For him to finish? For more? I couldn’t tell.

His thrusts became harder, faster and his breath came in quick gasps. He was getting close.

“Do you know why your pussy is so wet, Y/N?” He asked me.

It took a few tries and I had to wet my lips with my tongue before I could answer weakly. “Why?”

He was pounding into me harder than he had before, and I could feel my orgasm building, taking me higher and higher.

“Because it’s mine, baby girl.”

That was all it took to send me careening over the edge into oblivion. A myriad of curses left Noah’s lips as he thrust into me, once, twice before stilling as he finished inside me. 

Noah took a few minutes to slow his breathing before he began the work of untying me. He carefully removed each zip tie and the ropes before beginning to massage my wrists and ankles where they were rubbed raw from the abuse. He kissed me lightly before picking me up and carrying me into the bathroom. He finished undressing me before guiding me into the hot shower, steam rising around me. 

He joined me in the shower, and started washing my hair, my body, taking great care around the places that were sore. I had no use of my arms and legs and my body felt disconnected from my mind.

Is this what heaven felt like? I felt so free, so loose. God, I missed this.

Noah turned off the shower, the cold wrapping around me. I sighed. Why did it have to end so soon?

I felt a towel rubbing against my skin as Noah began to dry me off. He grabbed hold of my hand and walked me back to his bedroom after tucking the towel tightly around my body.

“Sit.” He commanded, pointing to his bed.

I immediately obliged and he crawled in behind me, sitting up against my back as he began to brush my hair.

I moaned and leaned into his touch, which caused him to chuckle lightly. “Did I wear you out, my love?” He asked.

“You know you did, you cocky asshole.” This garnered a full belly laugh from him, which vibrated against me. 

Noah put the brush down and buried his face into my neck, his arms wrapping around me, “I missed you so much, Y/N.”

“I missed you too, Noah.”

With a sigh he got up from behind me, going to his dresser to grab one of his t-shirts and a pair of his boxers for me to wear. I swam in his oversized shirts, and I loved it.

He slipped back on his sweats but remained shirtless. 

“We have to get on the road in a few hours.” Noah started. “Should I take you back to where you’re staying?”

I shook my head and smiled. “I have tickets to your next four shows.”

Noah blinked at me, before the biggest smile plastered his face. “You do?” He looked uncertain as he asked. “Maybe you could ride with us then?”

I took a moment to contemplate, “Are you sure that would be okay? I don’t want to intrude.”

“You could never intrude, Y/N. I would love it if you stayed. I want to spend every day with you.” Noah grasped my hands in his. “I want a life with you.”

I stared deeply into his eyes, it was everything I had wanted to hear all those months ago. To save myself from another fit of crying, I just nodded in response. Noah leaned down and kissed each of my fingers, one by one.

“Let me update the guys. Get dressed, make yourself comfortable. Maybe grab a snack from the kitchen and we can watch a scary movie until we fall asleep when I get back?” Noah was already up and heading out the door as he finished his sentence.

It wasn’t thirty minutes later I heard the rest of the boys quietly conversing in the living area, and Noah bidding them a good night before walking towards his room. I was curled up on his bed, a bag of Hot Cheetos on one side, and Watermelon Sour Patch Kids on the other.

“How did that go?” I smiled up at him.

He crawled in bed next to me, laying his head on my lap and moving the bag of Hot Cheetos out of his way. “Better than it could have gone. I told them I’d pay for the damages to the bus, but they were all happy to hear you would be joining us on the tour. At least for a little bit, right?”

“Yeah, you’ve got me for now.” I ran my hands through his hair. “Mind if I put on Halloween?”

I didn’t give him the option of an answer before pressing play. He just snickered and traced his fingers up and down my calf.

By the time we made it halfway through Halloween 2, Noah was on his side next to me and I was laying on his chest. His fingers ran idly up and down my back and I listened to the steady beat of his heart.

Noah’s fingers started slowing and his breathing became steady.

“I love you, Y/N,” He whispered before he drifted off to sleep.

I smiled. “I wish we could stay like this forever, Noah.”

Noah

I was dreaming about her, like I did most nights. These were happier dreams than usual. Her and I were sitting in the grass, mountains behind us and a lake in front of us. It was perfect. Just like her.

I looked over in my dream and she was smiling, laughing, looking more beautiful than I had ever seen another human being look. I placed my hand on her stomach, round with our child, my wedding band glistening in the early morning light. This is what true happiness was. Me, my wife, and our child - our daughter, just about to enter this world where she would be loved and cherished more than any other child had ever been.

This was our happily ever after.

I woke slowly, hesitant to leave my dreamscape, but eager to wake up next to the woman of my dreams. I stretched, feeling my back pop and groaning at the relief it brought me. Shows always made me so sore the next day, and last night’s activities sure didn’t help with that either. My cock twitched in my pants at the thought, and I was excited at the prospect of round two.

I reached over, searching for her with my eyes still closed, but found the bed cold and empty where she should be.

My eyes flew open and I jolted upright, scanning the room. 

Where was she?

Panic filled my veins as my breath came in short gasps, and my lungs felt like they couldn’t get enough air.

Other sounds started to filter in as my pulse quickened, and I heard the shower running. My body relaxed instantly, sagging as a low chuckle escaped me.

Of course she was in the shower. Where else would she be?

I took my time getting out of bed and leaving my room, heading towards the bathroom to join her.

I tried the door, but it was locked. Smart, there were three other men on this bus.

I knocked. “Y/N? Can I come in?”

I heard the shower turn off and wet footsteps make their way across the room before the door opened. 

I smiled as I looked into the eyes of the woman I love, and fixed my mouth to tell her good morning...before realizing it was Folio standing in front of me.

“Uh, Noah?” Folio looked confused. “Y/N is definitely not in here with me, I swear dude.”

My face fell, glancing around him. I almost wished she was in there with him. A pit formed in my stomach and I stumbled back into my room, frantically tearing it apart looking for my phone. As soon as I found it, I dialed her number by heart. I placed the phone to my ear, heart pounding so loud I was afraid I wouldn’t hear when she answered.

“The number you have reached is not in service. If you feel you have reached this message in error, please hang up and try your call again.”

[follows-the-bees]

I saw complaining how Ed and Stede don't treat Zheng right in the finale. And I want to walk through that journey and counter that.

First, Stede and Zheng are by themselves after escaping the cannonball. Zheng gets visibly upset, though turned away from Stede to hide her emotions, and he offers the only physical touch we see outside Ed to Zheng; tries to comfort her about what happened, her fleets getting blown up and then death of many pirates. Yes, it may be misplaced at the moment (and his words), Zheng doesn't want it, but he is offering what he has learned throughout the journey of the show: physical comfort.

Next, Zheng and Stede fight side by side on the beach. And when Stede sees Ed, Zheng tells him to go to him. They fight to get to each other and spend just enough time to get two quick kisses and about twenty words in; all together it's only about 30 seconds of time.

Ed has no idea who Zheng is, who knows if he even saw her before the moment she yells out to them again. He thought Stede was dead and was fighting the British "for Stede!" His priority is getting to tell Stede how he actually feels, that he loves him, the words barely escaping his lips before theirs even separate. This is a romantic comedy, so of course there is going to be a big declaration of love amid a near-death incident.

When Zheng calls for help, Ed asks who is that? (reminding us that he has no idea who Zheng is.) Stede explains and then together they run to go join and help Zheng.

We cut to the aftermath of the battle on the beach. The entire time the three of them are getting along, giggling and complimenting each other. What's the phrase: the best/lasting bonds are formed in battle? But anyway, no hate is shown here, only the trio getting along.

The three of them then fight to get the crew back, joking that it's pretty much a death sentence. But Spanish Jackie is a badass and already had the situation handled.

They all once again do another fuckery to escape: together. And Zheng and Auntie ask Ed (and Stede) to come with them on their hunt for Ricky. Friends may be a stretch at this point, but they are allies, appreciate each other's strengths and recognize they have a common enemy as well as journey in piracy. Zheng and Auntie sail away on the Revenge.with the rest of the crew. They are now the crew.

To counter the points I've seen about why Zheng isn't captain at the end, we gotta remember that Ed and Zheng are parallels. They are strong pirate captains who are forced into the old way of piracy: the toxicity. Both of their journeys are about being able to be their true selves, to allow their inner softness to emerge while keeping that badassness that made them the pirate captains they are. She's just lost her fleet, and I think it's perfectly in line with her journey to take a minute, something she could never do before to be among the crew, with Auntie, and he love interest(s?). Just like Ed is currently doing with Stede, taking a break from piracy and being a captain.

Zheng losing her fleet is heartbreaking, and it is supposed to be. And it's also a commentary on how Zheng's armada is just the other side of the coin of the British Empire. Her fleet is a totalitarian armada with the philosophy the old way of piracy: join us or die. It is what made Zheng a great Pirate Queen, but her journey is more than that, it's also about being a human, and as the show shows us time and time again, the traditional ways of piracy do not allow captains that humanity; it stifles it.

The end of Act || of the show is the destruction of the Golden Age of Piracy, which we see through Izzy's death, and the state of piracy and more specifically The Republic of Pirates.

I think Zheng's story is beautiful and I would have loved to see how it continued in season three.

[elizakai]

I’m having a perfectly normal amount of Undertale mechanic brain rot again💔

Resets specifically-

So like, we know that Flowey possesses control over the ability to Reset, and he tells us that he no longer was able to utilize this ability as soon as Frisk (the player?) enters into the underground, as they (us?) out-will him, and automatically overrule the Reset ability.

We know that in universe, humans posses determination in a way that monsters (usually) cannot, so that makes sense, however this does imply that the Reset ability only works within the underground itself?

If that weren’t the case, any potential person from the surface (its own whole world) who out-willed Flowey would have the ability by default.

I’m not willing to believe that this flower that was sprinkled in determination is more determined than any other in universe human.

I see people argue that only the ‘players’ are the humans possessing determination, but this doesn’t hold up if you consider the in world history that’s set in stone before we get involved, along with Alphys having physical access to DT to begin with.

Anyways, that would imply that…the world outside of the barrier marches on linearly, and that resetting and reloading only have an effect on what’s within the barriers seal? Because again, if the ability reached beyond the barrier, you’d assume anyone within its reach would qualify for uh. Time and space fuckery or whatever.

(Including Frisk before they even enter the underground, however i’m not clear if Frisk really has enough determination to overpower Flowey on their own? i mean, we’re able to reset without Frisk at the end of a true pacifist run after all, implying our own Determination is valid in universe. i can’t remember if that was ever entirely clarified. But again Frisk is a vessel seemingly for a reason and it kinda doesn’t make sense if they have no determination? For simplicity’s sake lets just assume that Frisk does possess a significant amount of Determination)

ANYWAYS AGAIN. This leads me to wonder a lot about how much time could potentially pass on the surface world while this bubble of space and time gets fucked with continually.

This also has me thinking that True Resets must have a wider reach than a normal Reset, considering it’s an (almost) complete start over. Including Frisk falling into the underground, instead of whatever spawn point they would have had for a normal Reset.

It would explain why a True Reset can only happen at the end of a Pacifist or Genocide run…a Neutral route doesn’t really affect the outside world aside from Frisk returning to it. Anything we did in game stays within that bubble. But a True pacifist run breaks the barrier, releases all monsters to the world, and brings a big change to the outside world as well. This applies to a Genocide route as well, because Chara destroys and rewrites the world, not the underground.

So far that makes sense, if True Resets affect the World as a whole, Resets are almost more akin to Reloads then to a True Reset. Resets seemingly go back to whenever Frisk comes into the picture as a vessel at a spawn point, the furthest point in time we can Reset to. (which makes me assume Flowey’s sort of ‘spawn point’ just is. when he was brought to life.)

True Resets have to go back further, especially if we consider things like the name of The Human, as in Asriel’s sibling, as in “Chara”

We all know by now that we give THAT human, the first human, a name, never do we have real control over Frisk’s name. Chara is the “True Name” according to the game, but we ARE able to change that name. Does that…imply that in different outcomes, or timelines, their name is just completely different? That’s a pretty big change, if that’s the case how far back would a True Reset reach time wise?

I know you could technically answer that by saying whenever we get the screen to “name the human”, but that doesn’t give an in universe explaination that makes sense. (yk since Chara existed and had a life before our influence-?)

It’s also perfectly valid to say this is looking to far into it…but also ZZZIIIIIP✨💔

uh idk man it’s 4 am i’m rambling and not fact checking sooo if anyone has other ideas or info or thoughts i’m interested in hearing it (if you read all this kudos pookie🌸)

[ginnsbaker]

In Losing Grip On Sinking Ships (1/?)

Summary: Sequel to In Flames I Sleep Soundly; After the divorce, Wanda refuses to give you up. 

Chapter word count: 5k+

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader

Chapter Warnings: Angst, Masturbation

Author’s Note: So... this AU wouldn’t leave me. For my new readers, you don’t have to read the first installment . This can be read as a standalone. Title is based on lyrics of “This Love” by Taylor Swift

AO3 | Masterlist

Taglist: @blackluthxr | @esposadejoyhuerta​

Next Chapter: Two

One

It’s not a god damn funeral, Wanda thinks as she stares at her black outfit.

With a huff, she makes the quick decision to reach for the zipper near the curve of where her spine becomes her head, and then pulls it down so hastily it gets out of track and refuses to budge further than her waist.

Shit, Wanda curses under her breath, wiggling her arms from its sleeves, which isn’t exactly difficult given her recent weight loss. At first she tries to shimmy her body out of the dress, but she only succeeds in getting stuck further and sweating under her pits. Unfortunately the weight loss didn’t happen around her middle, and she also couldn’t get it to move upwards and over her head. The options are to either fix the zipper or destroy the dress. Wanda picks the latter.

Grabbing a pair of scissors, she starts to frantically cut through the silky material. Her heart races as she terrorizes the dress with fervor–grunting Sokovian words she’s surprised she still remembers–until the dress pools at her feet in tatters. Wanda feels her energy depleted after, and she crawls on the bed to lie face down, on her stomach. 

To some degree, her recent outbursts are gradually becoming a concern, especially since she’s back in her old Manhattan neighborhood. The smallest, most insignificant things tick her off, and a densely populated city like New York is filled with them.

Like last week, when she was shopping at Trader Joe’s, and someone kept hitting her backside with their cart while waiting at the counter. 

“I swear to god, if you don’t lay the fuck off–” Wanda’s ears burned when she looked over her shoulder and saw a frail, old woman who looked like she didn't have many years left in her. 

“I’m sorry.” Wanda croaked out and then pressed her lips in a straight hard line. 

“Oh, it’s alright. We all have bad days. But sweetheart,” The old woman warmly smiled at her and then leaned closer as if to share a secret. “You need to get laid.” She added like she’s giving some age-old, archaic advice. 

Wanda’s smile in return was pasty, and she hurried to remove almost half of the stuff(not without receiving a dirty look from an employee who had to put them all back) in her basket so she could leave the counter as soon as possible. 

The mysterious universe had a dark sense of humor. It was sex that brought her to this manic-depressive, freak-out-at-a-grocery-store behavior, and to be told by a stranger that she needed more of it was just the icing on top of this tremendous fuckery of a year she’s had. 

Wanda turns on her back and closes her eyes for a minute. She doesn’t even know why she’s wasted an hour of choosing what to wear for the day she gets legally separated from you. And yet she couldn’t help but give an extra effort to look good for you. All she knows is the days she gets to see you are rare. She can count on one hand the times you’ve met since that fateful lunch at the diner back in Westview. She needs to look her best in these opportunities. 

She needs to look her best, and hopes you’d notice.

Glancing back at her wide-open wardrobe, that’s when she spots it. Hiding in the furthermost end of her rack, is a decade-old sundress she’s kept all this time. 

The memory rises unbidden to her mind, before she could stop it. 

It was the dress she wore on her first date with you. She recalls picking it specifically because it’s green. She wanted it to match her eyes–your favorite part of her body. It made you gape. It made you go almost stupid with want, forgetting the way to the restaurant where you made reservations because you wouldn’t stop staring at her. 

By the end of that night though, the dress was lost somewhere along the trip from the door to the bedroom.

“Aren’t we moving too fast?” You whispered against her swollen lips, breaking the kiss while your hands roamed all over her shaking frame. Wanda merely moaned and put her lips to your neck, kissing every inch of available skin to her. 

You’ve known each other for years. It didn’t feel like you were moving too fast. Rather, it was a culmination of sorts–seemingly platonic hugs that lasted just a tad longer than they should, the way your eyes always found each other in a crowded room, kisses on the cheek that came too close to the mouth. And not to mention, the other people you’ve both dated in those times of being more than friends but less than lovers. 

The pace was actually agonizingly slow. A slow burn that had put all other slow burns to shame.

You directed Wanda back to your mouth and the kiss that ignited again is its own kind of sex. God, she never really understood the fuzz about making out because her sexual experiences in the past didn’t really pay much attention to foreplay. For a while, she was simply content with the sliding of lips and tongues. But then you dropped to the floor and began pulling down her soaked thong, while your dilated eyes never left hers.

Wanda’s breath hitched at seeing you fall to your knees and gaze at her with incomparable reverence. How could you worship her when you yourself were so achingly beautiful?

She needed you to touch her soon or she’d go crazy. “Please.”

Her panties only made it past one ankle before you dove in to taste her for the first time. 

Wanda of the present comes at the ghost sensation of your tongue against her throbbing clit. In truth, it’s just her fingers that brought her to climax while she kneels at the center of her bed, her ruined underwear down past her thighs. She bucks her hips a couple of more times before falling back to the mattress, spent. 

That old lady was right. An orgasm does help.

-

The divorce is final. 

Today, she signed away any legal right she has as your partner. As for everyone else in the meeting room, it’s just another ordinary day to dissolve a marriage.

Wanda’s wearing the sundress that sort of accidentally gave her release this morning. You keep looking at her, no wonder trying to figure out why the dress looks so familiar. And Wanda can’t look at you straight in the eye without blushing. 

You came in with your ever reliable back-up: Natasha. Now that you’re no longer married to her, Wanda’s insecurities about the true nature of your relationship with Natasha has come up to the surface. The way Natasha would pat your back and ask you if you’re alright. The way she’d ask you if you’d like something to drink. The way she also knows you take your coffee black with three teaspoons of brown sugar.

The way she’s just always there. 

It annoys her enough that you said Natasha was your person, because then what was she to you? The title of soulmate triumphs over wife, and Wanda wants to be both. She wants all the titles. 

Well, maybe not all. She definitely doesn’t want to be called your ex-wife. But she’ll accept the reality for your sake. She wasn’t lying when she’d said she’ll give you everything you want, even if it puts her on the sidelines.

“Hey, do you want to get coffee?” Wanda breaks the spell of silence that lasted some five minutes when your lawyers and Natasha left the room to give you two a moment. 

She immediately wants to take back her words when you look at her  incredulously like she had grown another head on her lithe, sagged shoulders. 

“Seriously?” you say, and spitefully chuckle. 

Wanda says nothing, just resorts to quietly admiring you in a skirt suit she’s never seen you wear before. In the short time you’ve both been separated, she’s noticed little changes of yours that makes her homesick for you. You will wear new clothes and shoes, get a new haircut, try a new hobby, walk a certain way, and then all these changes will pile up until you become this inconceivable stranger. Still beautiful–but a stranger nonetheless. She knows the consequences of her actions are harder on you, but maybe, just maybe, it’s equally hard for her too. 

“I’m sorry, but I can’t,” you sigh, despondent. “Maybe for you it’s not, but today is the worst day of my life, Wanda. Or second. Or third. I don’t know. There’s so many of them recently, but this is definitely in the top three. I just want to be alone.” 

Wanda will never get used to the way you’re now just either angry or tired of dealing with her. She’s afraid to reassess the odds of getting you back and finding out it’s worse than zero. 

“Right,” Wanda says, looking down at her feet. “I don’t know what I was thinking.”

You hum in response.

“It is, you know?” Wanda says.

You shoot her a quizzical look. 

“It’s hard for me too,” Wanda clarifies. “I spent all morning picking out what to wear and getting all dolled-up, in desperate hopes you’d–you’d change your mind at the last minute.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel bad, or–”

“No,” Wanda cuts in in panic. Somehow she keeps saying the wrong things. “It’s hard for me. Because it’s the end for our marriage when all I want is to be with you right now.”

You avert your gaze and nod solemnly at her as if you understood. 

Do you?

Do you, perhaps, feel the same way? Or is she the only one still in love?

“I’m sorry for being a jerk,” you say, eyes downcast still refusing to meet her eyes. “I know it’s unfair for me to act like I’m the only one who’s hurting. I just–I’m tired of being angry and sad and lost all the time. And it doesn’t exactly help when you’re around. For once, I want to feel something else and I need to be alone to figure it out.”

I want to move on from you, is what Wanda thinks you really want to say and her eyes well up. This time, she prays you don’t glance her way. She might just break down right in front of you if you do. She’s never known this kind of desolation. And she only has herself to blame. 

For once, she’s thankful for Natasha’s presence when she interrupts the moment, asking if you’re ready to leave.

“I am.” you tell Natasha. You get up and round the long table to approach Wanda. She could no longer stop the tears from falling when she felt you place your hand softly on her shoulder. The touch is so featherlight, it may as well just be her imagination. 

“Thank you for giving me the best years of my life. Goodbye, Wanda.”

The pain that racks her entire body causes her to visibly shake. She has no idea how she’s still alive at this point. Not for the first time, she desperately wishes for a do-over. But the clock only moves forward, and it’s still moving to take you away. 

Maybe time will also be the one to bring you back someday.

-

Two Months Later

Wanda hasn’t seen you since the divorce. Not once. Nor has she heard from you at all. While you didn’t downright reject her when she had told you that she’d try to get you back, her unanswered texts and unreturned calls should be more than enough to tell her otherwise. 

Her only consolation is that you haven’t blocked her number yet. A few days after she last saw you, she texted to remind you to pick up the last of your things she has in possession. Natasha showed up at her door the very next morning, which confirms you still get her texts. The items are inconsequential in nature, but Wanda had the hardest time putting them in a box. 

She spent an unnecessary amount of time arranging your hardbound books alphabetically (“It’s just not the same, but a Kindle user would never understand.” you’d explain to her whenever you’d shop for more) and cleaning each protector of your small collection of Funko toys (“A dozen more of those and you won’t have space left in your side of the cabinet. What does that leave you with?” Wanda would reprimand you after seeing a shopping bag full of them in the trunk of the car. “Happiness.” you’d reply with a sheepish grin).

She smiled contritely after she had sealed the package; how ironic that she terribly missed the things about you she’s the least fond of. It’s as if the grieving doesn’t have an end. And if she had known you’d send Natasha to retrieve them, she wouldn’t have given them away. She wanted to keep them–wants to keep more of you as much as possible. Wanda wouldn’t call herself a masochist though. Not really. 

Because it’s not over yet. It will take as long as it needs to, and it won’t matter. Patience is her utmost virtue. 

And Wanda believes you feel the same, because there are midnights where her phone would ring from an unknown number. She’d answer and listen to shaky, shallow breaths for a minute before the person on the other line ends the call. It couldn’t be anyone else but you, could it? These moments are always hazy, however, muddled by wine and prescription pills. But Wanda swears they happen. 

The days aren’t so bleak when she pretends she’s still your wife, and you’re just in some faraway place–like a soldier that has gone to war, she’s left to count the days until she’s in your arms again. She goes about her routine as she’s always done when the two of you were still together; go for a run in the mornings, have eggs and toast for breakfast, and then walk Sparky in the afternoon. Her evenings, excruciating and long, are the loneliest hours. Sleep won’t come easy to her, if it comes at all. Her heart mostly breaks as well for Sparky, who still waits by the door around the time you used to arrive home from work. He’d patiently wait there until Wanda would call for him, or fall asleep in the exact same spot. And it’s not like she can talk to him and explain why you won’t come home. All Wanda can do is wait for Sparky to forget this learned behavior or forget you.

So, for the past two months, she’s been taking it one day at a time. It’s now the only way she knows how to survive. It’s working so far, she muses, as she stands before the proof of it while carrying Sparky under her arm, right in the middle of a quiet street in Queens. 

Wanda had loaned the capital for the business right after the divorce papers were signed, and when she got the alimony from it, it was more than enough to pay back the loan in full and still for some change.

She wanted to create something out of what she had destroyed. 

And that’s how the borough’s first Sokovian café came to be. Or at least will come to be when the renovations are finally completed. She can’t see much through the scaffolding that is still in place, but she can make out what it would look like once it’s officially open to the public.

Her contractor and fellow Sokovian migrant, Mr. Jacobs spots her from where he is installing the signage. “Ms. Maximoff!”

Wanda smiles up at him, brushing her bangs away from her sight. The haircut is recent and she kind of regrets it. “Is everything okay around here?”

“I believe so. There’s still some electrical stuff to finish, but I’m confident we’ll be done before your opening.” he tells Wanda.

Sparky starts squirming against Wanda’s hold. “Is it okay to come inside or should I come back another day?” Wanda asks.

“Of course. I had my boys clear out the area and install the A/C last night, so you should be comfortable.”

Perfect. She’s yet to test out the oven she ordered, and there are some new recipes she’d like to try. 

“And Ms. Maximoff?”

“Yes?”

“Don’t worry, this place is going to do great. They’re gonna love you and our culture.”

A feeling of warmth spreads through Wanda’s chest. “Thank you, Mr. Jacobs.” He gives her a salute before going back to work.

Wanda’s not ready for the emotion that consumes her when she steps inside her new café. She puts Sparky down on the hardwood flooring, and his nose immediately gets to work, sniffing every corner of the room he could find–which isn’t all that long to cover for a regular-sized Jack Russell Terrier like him. The rented space is relatively small, so Wanda had to be smart with its interior design; a long bench stretches from the open kitchen and counter to about two feet from the entrance, spanning two round dining tables that could sit two people at a time; by the window wall facing the street, is a high top table with two chairs. At most, three staff(including her) could fit in the open kitchen, along with a single espresso machine and a wall oven. All in all, the café can accommodate about six customers dining in at a time, which is why she’s hoping she’d do better with take-outs. 

Wanda did all the decorations herself, top to bottom. The floral ceilings are a combination of autumn colors–your favorite season–and pendant lights subtly drop from them to emit a faint, yellow glow. The polished concrete wall of the dining area gives it an industrial vibe, while red brick tiles clad the panels of the kitchen area. For the finishing touches, Wanda decided to place a variety of potted plants in every corner of the room. 

Standing at the center of it all, Wanda feels a sense of pride and fulfillment–something that seemed implausible to her just a few months before.

"Best coffee in the world. Maybe you should start a café business." You’d joke sometimes whenever she makes you coffee in the morning.

A shadow passes over her eyes as she looks out the window. Needless to say, there’s only one thing missing in it. The person she wants next to her when all her dreams come true.

You.

–

Pietro finishes a whole batch of white chocolate macadamia cookies by himself. Wanda’s twin brother flew in last weekend, a rare occurrence since she only sees him once a year at most. He’d be home in the holidays for dinner, and be gone the following day. He lives with a suitcase, and never stays in a city for longer than two weeks. Wanda wasn’t expecting he’d visit her after she broke the news of her divorce, knowing he had gone through the same ordeal twice already without fuss. Apparently, it’s a run-of-the-mill life event for her brother, and it almost did not make it to their bimonthly check-in calls. 

“You’re gonna have to pay me for those.” Wanda tells him. She’s crouched on the floor, feeding Sparky strips of dried meat as she takes a break between baking and practicing her Youtube-acquired skill of Latte Art.

“I thought it’s a welcome home gift.” Pietro says, licking off the crumbs from his fingers. With the bleach in his hair extending to his medium stubbles, their resemblance is close to nonexistent. 

“You earn ten times more than I do in a year.”

“So? What is family for if not free food?”

“It’s $52 dollars.” Wanda says.

Pietro hands her a hundred dollar bill. “Keep the change.”

Wanda smirks at him, pocketing the money in her apron. “I intended to.” She passes him a napkin, and gestures at his chin. He waves her off in a pompous manner, and instead, goes to the back of the shop to clean himself up. She didn’t think it’s possible to both know and not know someone at the same time. To look at them and see who they are versus who you think they’re supposed to be. In terms of money and status, he is miles ahead of Wanda, but perhaps at the cost of being unable to find the brother she shared her childhood with in Sokovia. Wanda’s not sure if he still exists beneath the layers of branded suits and expensive perfumes, she just knows she misses him terribly. 

“Second Chances,” Pietro proclaims as he returns a minute later, waving his hands wildly with an imitation of a fanfare. “A little corny if you ask me.”

“Well, I’m not asking you,” Wanda contends and then proceeds to scrub the empty tray that Pietro left in the wake of his cookie binge. “It’s a good name. People can interpret it however they want.”

“And you? What was on your mind when you came up with it?”

Wanda doesn’t answer that. 

“So,” Pietro jumps into a sitting position on the counter and lets his legs dangle from its edge. 

“How’s the quarter-life crisis, sis?”

Wanda cocks an eyebrow and gives him a once over. “Better than yours. All things considered.” 

Sparky comes up to him and stands on his hind legs to snuffle at his shiny loafers. 

“Touché,” Pietro laughs good-naturedly and crosses his legs to avoid the dog’s attention. “It’s weird though, seeing you get into this kind of thing.”

“What do you mean?” Wanda asks.

“You’re not a salesperson, Wands. Remember your girl scout days? Dad would buy all your cookies because you can’t sell for shit.”

Wanda snorts noisily through her nose. “Mom can’t bake for shit.” She notices the smile fall from his lips at the offhand jab at her brother’s favored parent. 

Wanda sighs. When she does get glimpses of the old Pietro, it’s mostly through negative triggers. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to–” Wanda starts to apologize but Pietro quickly changes the subject without a preamble.

“You’re really not going to talk about it?” 

“About what?”

“Playing dumb isn’t a good look on you.”

Wanda suddenly drops the tray on the sink, the violent sound of metal hitting metal giving both of them a minor headache. She pauses to think, and then says, “How about you just ask me straight instead of skirting around the topic of she-who-must-not-be-named?”

“Okay,” Pietro says in an annoyingly placid tone. “What were you thinking, cheating on Y/N?”

Wanda swallows dryly. She did ask him to be blunt.

“I wasn’t. There’s… I don’t know how to explain it. There’s this missing gap, and I acted to fill that gap.” 

“Was it something that’s missing in your relationship?” Pietro asks and props his cheek on his palm. The question is so familiar to her because she’s asked it herself countless times, the day she kissed Vision for the first time. There wasn’t an epiphany nor were there pieces falling into place when she had slept with him. And when she thought she loved him, it wasn’t because she thought she loved you any less. She came to the conclusion, not too long ago, that perhaps there’s just something rotten inside of her that she simply wasn’t aware of. 

Wanda shakes her head, weary at making sense of herself and her decision to risk everything she’s built with you for something as cheap as a fling. “None of this was her fault. Her only mistake was falling for someone who’s way beneath her.”

“I always thought she’s too good for you, no offense.”

Wanda’s smile is brittle as she recalls how Pietro’s toast at the wedding started with that exact sentence, word-for-word. You had squeezed Wanda’s clammy hand as you listened to Pietro rant about Wanda, and jokingly express his regret that you married the lesser twin. Wanda apologized for his tactlessness, and you responded with a kiss to her cheek, telling her how wrong he was, how you were only good and she made you better. 

“I’m sorry, Wands,” Pietro tells her earnestly. “I can’t say I’ve been through the same thing even with two divorces under my belt. I don’t think I’ve ever been in love with someone the way you both were with each other–or at least, the way she was in love with you.”

“Thanks, but that's not necessary. I’m going to fix it.” she says. 

It stings–the implication that Wanda was incapable of matching your love for her. But it only stings because it’s the truth. You deserve to be happy and she failed.  And yet, she also can’t survive the thought of you getting the happiness you deserve from someone else. After all this time, her selfishness hasn’t been tamed. 

Which is why Pietro’s next words hit her right in the gut. “Divorce can’t be fixed. Hell, it’s the only resolution for a terminal relationship. And hasn’t it crossed your mind that perhaps, she’s already met someone else?”

Wanda gives up on her search for the rolling pin. She cracks some eggs in a bowl and starts to furiously whisk by hand.

Maybe she’s an awful person for assuming you won’t be able to move on from her that easily. 

But that’s just how she sees it. 

“No.” she says.

“What makes you so sure?”

“I know her, Piet.”

Pietro starts clapping in slow, steady beats. “She divorces you and you’re still so smug about how she’s so crazy about you.” he says. 

“If you’ve ever felt loved by someone like her, you’d understand.”

Pietro ignores his sister’s underhanded attempt to hurt him back. He came to terms with the reality ages ago, that he’s probably not one of the lucky ones who will get to experience the kind love that Wanda boasts about with you. Maybe he had it once, not necessarily in a romantic sense. But when he thinks of love–real love–he thinks of no one but their estranged mother. 

“Or maybe,” He jumps off the counter to retrieve his coat hanging from one of the dining chairs.  “Love goes away eventually.”

“Not ours.”

Pietro couldn’t help the maniac laughter that escapes his throat. “Are you hearing yourself right now? Do you know how pathetic you sound?”

Wanda purses her lips, continues whisking. 

“Okay, how about this. If you really love her, then you’d at least want her to be happy, even if it’s not with you.” Pietro tries to reason. 

“Oh, so you’re suddenly an expert on the topic.”

“I’m a dick, not an asshole. And yes, there’s a difference.”

Wanda keeps working the whisk like a madwoman. Large amounts of bubbles are forming in the emulsion, and overbeating the egg mixture is definitely not in the recipe.

Pietro continues, “Yeah, I’m a cheater, same as you are–”

“Don’t you dare–” Wanda suddenly tosses the whisk on the worktop, a glint of something dangerous in her green eyes. 

“Let me finish,” Pietro appeases lightly. “I’m a cheater. I cheated on my ex-wives. But when I look in the mirror, I don’t see myself as some anti-hero who has the potential to be an actual hero and become the person they deserve to be with. Because I’ll never be that guy.”

“We’re not the same. We share a birthday, but that’s where the similarities end.”

“We share the same DNA, Wanda,” Pietro smiles through his frustration. Excessive stubbornness–another quality innate to Maximoffs. “But that’s not the point. You know she’d be better off without you. As cliché as it sounds, the only way you can actually show her you love her is by letting her go–completely.”

The shuddering sigh that escapes her is immediately followed by erratic sobs that go out of control fast. Pietro is right there in an instant, an arm thrown over her shoulder as her whole body jerks, rasping for air. 

“Shit, I’m sorry.” he murmurs into her crown. “You’ll be okay, Wands. I promise…you’ll be okay.”

“Will you be okay if I leave you here? I have to meet someone in a few.” 

Wanda heard you say in earnest. She lost herself for a while, stunned by the kindest pair of eyes she’d ever seen. The day flew by so quickly in your company, she hadn’t realized it was time to go. And to think that she almost skipped freshman orientation because going to New York University wasn’t exactly the plan. Columbia was–where her boyfriend was a junior. 

Her boyfriend, who she forgot texted her an hour ago asking if she was ready to go, and hadn’t heard back from her.

“Y-Yeah, my boyfriend is on the way to pick me up.” she mumbled, distracted by the glow of the sunset forming a halo around your head. You were beautiful in a way that was not entirely evident at first. Wanda was curious if anybody else had made the same discovery.

“It was nice meeting you, Wanda.”

“Likewise, Y/N.” she smiled like she’d been doing all day with you, and so frequently, that the muscles on her face were beginning to hurt a little. 

The smile you returned her way was glorious, but in a flash you were already walking away. Wanda couldn’t describe the way she fervently despised watching you go, especially without your number on her phone and no means to contact you in the future.  

“Y/N?” Wanda called out. Her heart seemed to swell and swing against her rib cage. 

“Yes?”

“Do you, maybe, want to hang out sometime?”

And the kindest eyes that ever looked at her gave the answer. 

Pietro leaves shortly after the tremors subside and her breathing returns to normal. The panic attacks aren’t that frequent, but she does get them now from time-to-time. They started right after the night you gave Wanda your wedding ring. 

With her brother gone, Wanda is left to wonder if you’ve met someone. She is left to wonder if you’re no longer miserable like she is, if you’ve taken considerable strides in moving on with your life. She tries calling you. Not to talk, but just to check if you still haven’t blocked her number. After several rings, you don’t pick up as expected. Not a setback. Not a progress either. She pretends you’re asleep or in the shower. She pretends you mean to call her back, but forgets to. 

And if a confirmation of not being blocked is all she gets, she’ll take it.

She’ll take what you can give even if it’s nothing.

[prettyboykatsuki]

Does methinks have more thoughts on alpha togame they'd like to share?

tags for gender neutral + afab!reader (no mention of specific secondary sex but they can smell togames scent), dubcon (just out of rut shennanigans), mean togame, rough sex, omegaverse fuckery, a mention of face-fucking 18+

SO GLAD U ASKED ANON...

__

Togame tells you about his rut two full weeks in advance and makes a point to emphasize that you're not allowed to see him.

He never tells you no, though sometimes he likes to pretend. His immediate, firm rejection of spending time together during his rut strikes you as odd. Even more, he's being totally unreasonable by refusing to explain to you. You try not to take it heart because Togame is by all other means, perfect. And the way he lets you down is the same as always - kind, relaxed playful. Tells you it's not a big deal but still.

Still. It's unusually serious and worries you all the same.

He won't explain why he can't be with you during his ruts either, doesn't bother with the details and smooths past it when youpry. You snoop around Shishitoren searching for answers, but every member who's been with Togame long enough to know just gives you wide eyes and dodges your question. Choji answers you after some prying, with a wide toothed smile and a shake of his head.

"He's not really himself," And then a little kinder. "He's probably just worried about doing something bad to you. His ruts are kinda scary."

If Choji is saying so, you can't help but believe it's true. Still, Togame is your partner and he's always good to you, albeit a little difficukt. It feels like the least you can do is to be with him through it so he doesn't have to go through it by himself. You try arguing with him but he's always firm, even jokes he'll lock you out of his apartment if you show up.

It's maybe a bad idea for you to go over, but you can't help it. It's the first time he's been in rut in your relationship and the thought of him being by himself troubles you. So you go, you even bring things he might need.

You can immediately feel the suffocating, oppressive air when you arrive to his apartment. It's so strong it makes your skin prickle regardless of your sensitivity to pheromones. They practically seep under the door, make the hairs on your neck stand. A signal to danger, telling you to run while you're ahead.

But you're stubborn, so you stay and ring the door bell. It takes a few times before Togame really answers.

The first thing you notice is how different he looks. His hair is down and his glasses are off and his expression is... hard to describe. Dilated pupils, heaving breaths - something wild about him you rarely see, not even in fights. You remember what Choji says about him not being himself and decide it's accurate. Togame barely looks like himself.

"Why're you..." He shakes his head, covering his face with his hand to cover his nose. "Go home. Now."

You're being stubborn, but it's frustrating. "Let me in. I just want to to help you—"

"Go home. I'm saying this for you. Go."

It's petulant but you shake your head and frown. "I'm not going home."

He gives you a long look, scrubbing a hand over his face. His scent gets stronger, intoxicating - makes you lungs feel hot and your chest tight. You let out a shaky little breath and cross your arms. It takes a minute before you feel yourself be tugged forward. It happens too quickly for you to make any sense of it. Your bag is dropped onto the ground, back pushed against the door while Togame pins your wrists between his hands.

His voice is thick, lacking his usual bravado. "Don't be stubborn and go home." He says, the force of his grip getting tighter as if to drive in his point. "I'm hanging on by a fucking thread right now,"

"I'll be fine," You make sure to meet his eyes. "It's fine even if you hurt me. I'm not gonna break into a million pieces. I'm here willingly because I love you,"

He laughs. There's something caustic to it. "You're really have a talent for testing my patience."

You can feel the threads of his control snap when Togame finally kisses you. It's rough, more teeth than lip - a harsh clattering, a desire to dominate that bleeds itself into the gesture. He rarely reveals so much of his desire towards you with so little coaxing.

His scent is so thick you cant breathe. It's oppressive, washes away your own with no remorse. Your pressed so squarely into the wall there's nowhere for you to go, nowhere to run now even if you wanted too. The fabric of your clothes tears like paper under his grip, leaves you gasping as he grips you. It's bruising and quick, makes your heart hammer half-way between fear and full blown lust.

His voice is muddled with animalistic need but the words - his convictions are spoken with unmistakable clarity. "I won't go easy on you." Another nip, a bite - a harsh hand coming down on your ass that makes you yelp. "I'll fuck you until you cry and make you wish you ran away. Even then, you won't get any sympathy from me."

True to his word, Togame shows you no mercy. He fucks you right at is doorway with your face pressed to the wood and makes you squirt on his welcome mat. Fucks you with a leg up in the entrance to his living room, pinning you down even when you want to run away. His entire house ends up soiled before you even make it the bedroom - cum dripping on his counters, saliva from face-fucking you staining his couch. He fucks you up against a window and holds you up while he does it once - telling you his neighbors are going to see if you don't cum on his cock fast enough.

By the time you get to his room, your whole body is throbbing from all you've endured. You catch a glimpse of yourself in his mirror and you're covered in bitemarks and hickies. Too fucked out in a daze, Togame is still relentless. Still hard after cumming in you so many times and still with enough energy to pin your knees up - fucking you with your spine at an angle with just as much aggression as before.

He's barely sober enough to collect himself when your gazes meet for the first time in a while.

He smiles at you and it should be scary but it arouses you instead. "My ruts last days," He tells you, meeting your mouth in a sloppy kiss - through drool and sweat "Let's do out best together."

You can barely breathe, nodding in a daze as you resign yourself to fate

[danwhobrowses]

Critical Role C3 Ep 118 - Initial Thoughts

Well guys I maaaade it

It's 8am (well 9 now) and frosty in England and I had like, 1 hour light snoozing, I'm currently basking in the delusional energy being sleep deprived sustains until the inevitable crash but for now, an episode happened!

First of 2025, first I could watch in full thanks to PTO and willpower, shivering with nerves all day so let's cover the thoughts I remember at least (was staying as still as possible to avoid making noise for the others sleeping, so couldn't do the clickety clacks - and as you can tell by my use of 'clickety clacks' that my verbage may be as loopy as a rollercoaster at times)

Spoilers for the episode

Adorable abnormally named animals that looked more like a pupper and a gerbil, Bandit was true to his name

Oh geez more fucking monologuing, even Sam had the cup thing for it XD

Remember that fanart of Laudna, Orym and Ashton kicking Liliana after verbally dressing her down? Well that but this time with Ludinus, loved the pressing

Got some mini Ludie backstory and it was 'my family died as collateral in the Calamity', it's so hilariously basic at this point he deserved every bit of Ashton's 'get the fuck over it'

Part of me also couldn't help but think of Istho, the reluctant to die Paladin of the Lawbearer imprisoned at the Bloody Bridge literally a year ago, they had the same mantra

Would've been cooler to get a bit more Lawbearer sauce before in this campaign but fairs enough

Fearne just wants to give everyone cupcakes and candy and treats being the vessel of the God Eater like winning the lottery and I love her for it

It's not lost on me as an Ashton fan that Ludie never asked them what they wanted. There's a gist yes of controlling your own fate but still, got a lil' under your skin didn't they?

Chet no, don't try to open the cascade of sigils!

HA! Poofed out of his second monologue

Braius don't call him, you're gonna call him aren't you?

FUCKING LYING WHORE CHEATER BITCH Azzy, how's the family?

Brennan is untouchable but Matt's Fucking Lying Whore Cheater Bitch Azzy M still gives me the feeling of 'you know all the right things to say but I can still hear your manipulation'

Family, Braius, is right here! I get he's been around longer but first it's 'chase away and I'll remain' now it's 'don't let it out', mixed messages

I probably would've laughed to death if Ludie got distracted by the toy, though I do wish it was an Intuit Charge

RAVENOUS VOID OFF THE FUCKING BAT?? I was literally looking at that spell a few days ago

The aoe and save was so fucking high too, and I could've sworn Ashton can't be moved in Titan form, and resists all but Force Damage

Oh shit the neck! The neck comes back around!

God the cast rolled so badly for so long, and he kept saving and using his resistance

Not the neck ladies, the body, da body!

PATE I LOVE YOU

Pate noooo!

IRAAAAAAA I LOVE YOU!

MISTERRRRRR! I LOVE YOU!!

ASHTOOOOOOOON I LOVE YOU! That is my motherfucking barbarian tank killing the concentration

OH MY FUCKING DAYS POWER WORD STUN IMOGEN I FUCKING LOVE YOU!

I was counting the damage, once you knew it was below 150 all it needed was the math

Bless Ashley for wanting to go big but couldn't because of aoe

It had to be Orym, IT HAD TO BE ORYM, how's that for resolve?

Ira laughing in Ludie's face was cathartic too

'I don't want to hurt anyone, or kill anyone' - SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE ASHTON HATERS IN THE BACK!

We were so fucking close though, so close to the 'we can't absorb it but it can't stay here' point, we could've had an option C like sending it to a Demiplane

Surprised me how much Laudna pushed for pro-Predathos, given Imogen's reluctance, and Orym just unable to argue it because it's been argued to death

Oh god is he not dead? Fuckery duck, Laudna you have that ghost tracking thing right?

'What did you do to me, I used to be fun' - you still are you just have mushrooms planned with Fearne for after

Imogen you talked a lot about being free to decide your fate and now you're literally walking towards what 'fate' planned out for you

We are LITERALLY approaching what Ludinus wants to do

Child's voice is a nope, like an absolute nope

Like a 'Guys did we not learn from the Dominox?' nope

Because GUYS DID WE NOT LEARN FROM THE DOMINOX??

Orym insight checked a God Eater, got a whisper, stepped between it and the Ruidusborns, and that was not a red flag??

The collective 'ohhhh' though

Like, I get hearing it out, trying to see if we've simply been misinformed, but the proof is kinda in the pudding and it is dessert time

It knocked Chet into a wall for opposing, that's a nope

Hey Matt don't you think the Primordials partly responsible for this cage would have some resonance with it since we're getting clips of Tengar and Orym's Wildmother vision for all to see?

Imogen and Fearne NO

Predathos the nice hot faun lady told you to wait

Fearne YES but IMOGEN NO!

Fearne Yes! ...right? Answer the question cliffhanger! RIGHT?

I mean she heard her, that's something, are we gonna have to give Imogen her first death in the campaign? Can that staff factor in at all?

Definitely peeved that Imogen went and pulled a Frodo right at the last moment, but like the One Ring in Mount Doom she is being lulled by Predathos muddying her instincts, so I can kinda see why she thought it the kindest option, also le drama I suppose, Laura Bailey had to put her own third wedding one-shot in jeopardy

I have to be at work next week and there's a likelihood that the worst ending happens and Ludinus didn't get his ancient elf ass handed to him permanently ;_; so the stage is different, the health and spell slots are lower, but the fear is the same and I can't stay up for it

Contrary to others though I do still want a happy ending, the Hells aren't bad or evil for what they were attempting; the intentions was still good it was just not right. Someone else would've come, if not Ludinus then someone else with the same plan, but this is why we should've discussed alternatives earlier, this is why a united goal is important and why the Arch Heart fucking up the plan with his visit rubbed me the wrong way

At least now the Hells are gonna be on the same page with Predathos, it's about saving your people - so, save your people