#and raven cycle fics too
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This is one of the most underrated parts of Dream Thieves. Just so much to unpack.
Adam's indescribable horniness for Helen's kitten heels? Like, sir? Are you okay?
IMMEDIATELY projecting said horniness onto Declan? He's not even THERE. Why's he catching strays? Foul.
It's even more foul considering it's not remotely true. Dating Helen would be Declan's personal hell. For one, she's smart, loves meddling in people's lives, and has immense resources at her disposal. Helen Gansey and her sexy sexy shoes would be his worst nightmare. Forget dating, even being in the same room as her would make Declan start to dry-heave in panic.
And SECONDLY, you know Declan is at once wildly resentful, disgusted, and bewildered by eldest siblings who aren't massively parentified. Like, what do you MEAN your life's sole purpose isn't to protect your younger brother? Sounds fake, but ok. Couldn't be me though.
#now I need fic where helen and declan meet#but anyway#adansey this and pynch that#what about adam's psychosexual obsession with all his friends older siblings??? Huh???What about that?#wasnt there something with him and orla too?#trc#The Raven Cycle#The Dream Thieves#Adam Parrish#Helen Gansey#Declan Lynch#Richard Gansey iii
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it's criminal how few fics there are about adam and declan's dynamic, especially when you consider how declan absolutely clocked adam's shit in greywaren.
#like the parallels are right there guys#if anyone can match each other's freak it's these two#but lowkey this is like that one thing where if you can't find what you're looking for you should just make it yourself...#the ideas are flowing but they're getting muddled with the niall/mor pre-cringefail marriage fic that's been stewing in my brain 4 too long#declan lynch#adam parrish#trc#the raven cycle#tdt#the dreamer trilogy
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Because Ronan knew grief like he knew Adam Parrish, unknowable Adam Parrish. In breath, and heartbeat, in the lines around his eyes and the freckles on his shoulders. Ronan Lynch knew Adam Parrish in the tilt of his smile, the light of his eyes and the lines over the palms of his hands. Because Ronan Lynch would know Adam Parrish in life, in death, and in all that was in between. Then, now, tomorrow, always.
#the raven cycle#pynch#ronan lynch/adam parrish#ronan lynch#adam parrish#wanted to share this little snippet from my latest fic#im a little obsessed with it ngl…..but…..maybe it’s stupid and im jsut too obsessed w myself
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Loving Adam Parrish is an act of self care.
#if you get it you get that I’m serious#some days I can’t even think about him because it makes me 🥴🥴#you know it’s fkgnrjfj when I’m being unwell on main#I haven’t read a single pynch fic in weeks because I just 🥴🥴 with his character sometimes the ✨relating✨ of it all feels too real#Adam Parrish#army of one#pynch#trc#the raven cycle#the dreamer trilogy
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first chapter of my Blue and Adam in a time loop trying to save Gansey in TRK fic is up. It’s part one of two of the first loop am planning for 5 loops 10 chapters alternating povs, this one is Blue pov.
#s speaks#my fic#trc#the Raven cycle#Blue Sargent#Adam Parrish#Richard Gansey#(even though he was only in the chapter at the very end over a phone lol)#Maura Sargent#Calla Johnson#Gwenllian Glendower#Orla Sargent#Bluesey#Adansey#Bluedansey#Pynch#Sarchengsey#those are all pairings that are going to be a part of this fic for sure I’m sure others will be too because everyone is in love with everyo#in these books.#not so happy with the title I wanted something to do with mirrors and time but everything seemed cheesy. And this kind of fits#trc fic#time loop fic#tesselation
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hi everyone!! i signed up for fandom trumps hate this year. winning bid to one of the listed charities will get minimum 5k words of fic from me in either alex stern/ninth house OR raven cycle fandom.
bidding is now open and runs until this sunday so if you are interested... hit me up! my bid page is here; feel free to contact me if you have any questions :)
#fandom trumps hate#fth2023#the raven cycle#alex stern series#ninth house#bunch of other bids up for trc fandom too... i think i am the only auction for alex stern fic lol /)__(\
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Someday Snippet
Thanks @lynxindisguise for the tag!
I’m writing like four different fics right now, but this weekend I went down a Pando spiral because one of my besties is currently reading TRC for the first time…
So here’s a bit from my Pando files that made Mel cry today, in which Adam Parrish gets a puppy.
———
It was an early summer Monday when Adam Parrish received the two phone calls that would change his life.
The first call came in the morning. It was an unusually slow morning for Adam who rarely allowed himself the luxury of slow mornings. But he had just turned in his last final exam the night before, and he did not have a shift at his campus job until the afternoon, so he could find no reason to spur his body into its usual state of frenetic action.
He was getting soft, he thought, as he walked his dog lazily along the Georgetown sidewalk in the early morning sunshine.
Technically, Lux was not really a dog. Technically, she was a gift. She was a dream creature, Ronan’s latest, and possibly one of his last. Ronan continued to debate the ethics of creating living creatures, internally and aloud with Adam, and they usually agreed in the end that it was best not to indulge in God-like acts of creation regularly, or frivolously, or really at all, if he could help it.
Ronan could have lied and told him Lux was an accident, but Adam would not have believed it. She was too complex for that, and besides, Ronan hated to lie. No, Ronan created Lux with all the focused intention and maniacal pride required to create anything, and she was a wonder.
Well, currently she was stopped on a patch of grass, attempting to sniff her own asshole.
Luckily that was not the extent of her talents. The true gift of her could not be observed like a dog show trick. It had to be felt.
When Ronan had given Lux to Adam, they’d been at the barns. Ronan still dreamed best at the barns. Adam had awoken from an unusually long and deep sleep to find Ronan sitting up beside him, clutching a small bundle of warm white fur to his bare chest. Lux was so bright, pure white like the sheets in Ronan’s room dappled with sun, that Adam almost mistook her for part of the downy landscape of the bed. But then Ronan turned her face to Adam and he could see that she was a puppy, new and pearlescent and squinting into the light.
“Don’t be mad,” Ronan had said, before Adam could speak. “I made her for you.”
“Ronan,” Adam cautioned, though against what he wasn’t sure. She had already been made. Ronan could not undo it now.
“Do you want to hold her?” Ronan asked, before Adam could think up another protest.
Adam nodded, because yes, he really did want to hold her. He already loved her. He would wonder later if this love was natural or an effect of Ronan’s dreaming. She would not be the first dream creature of Ronan’s with love built in.
Ronan passed the creature to Adam, so carefully. He was always tender with ephemeral and defenseless things. As soon as Lux left his arms, Adam saw a shadow cross Ronan’s face. A trace of regret, as if he didn’t want to give her up, there and then buried. Adam was about to call him on it when he folded Lux’s creamy white fur against his heart for the first time and understood.
Lux was a dream that Ronan had not wanted to wake from. When she squirmed against his skin, settling, Adam felt the opposite of lonely. He was within the kind of rare, good dream where he was surrounded by friends, by people who loved him and who he loved, in all the clumsy ways he loved them. In the sweet comfort of this dream, no one was missing.
“Oh,” was all he could say to let Ronan know that he felt it too. He hastily brushed a tear from his eye.
#I promise I am working on True Blue too#and Vamprie AU#and actually the third long promised AFTG fic#but also having a lot of Pando related thoughts#trc#the raven cycle#adam parrish#ronan lynch#pynch#pynch fic#light follows darkness and all that#the real heads know what I mean
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am i gonna have to start writing fic again just to combat the shortage of autistic!gangsey fics in the trc fandom
#theres far too little for characters as autistic as these#(to be clear i am autistic myself)#and just. general nd fics? wheres my ocd gansey. my biploar adam. adhd ronan.#must i do everything myself smh#anyway send me prompts ima get into writing fic again as a challenge for new years#emery.exe#the raven cycle#trc
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uhhh throws fic at you and runs away
(TRC post-apocalyptic road-trip fic because i love apocalypse movies and had too much time on my hands today) (i am my own target audience)
#there are. too many watership down references planned for this fic#trc#the raven cycle#maggie stiefvater#the dreamer trilogy#richard gansey iii#fanfiction#tig’s fics
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popping back in for a minute to say, yes, i have a new account @becomingicarus (i post more trc!) and yes, i have an ao3 (where i post polygangsey fics, ronsey fics, and roahsey fics :) as well as some other fandoms!)
it’s about a girl who’s destined to kill her true love with a kiss, a boy with a life-and-death obsession with hunting a dead welsh king, a boy who thinks he is not enough, who is the eyes and ears to a magical forest, a wounded boy who can dream things to life, a smudgy boy, a toga party. it is about three brothers and deadbeat parents and teachers who want to kill you, it is about how far they’ll go to get their answers, it is about sleeping trees and a house full of psychics, it’s about loving people so deeply you’ll never get the chance to even think about life without them. it’s about trust and bees and being gone and being remembered and phone calls late into the night and kissing ghosts for practice. it is about orange lipstick, ravens, clawing someone’s eye out, it is about orange camaros and mint leaves and cereal boxes where floor should be. it is manic, it is all-consuming, it is gut wrenching in the best way and lovely and it is being murdered outside your house on a hot afternoon (your favorite son finds you).
#trc#the raven cycle#ao3#fic rec#sorry. this is a shameless plug actually. my fics feed my soul so i want u to eat well too.#if thats ur thing.
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! 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐓𝐎 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐌𝐄 𝐟𝐭. 𝐠𝐨𝐣𝐨
ALPHA! GOJO x F OMEGA! READER
+ synopsis. you live in a world where omega and alpha qualities are medically treated at birth to become dormant later in life. present day, only betas & pseudo-betas exist, pheromones & its effects are left in the distant past, and heats & ruts are reduced to monthly cycles of being slightly hornier than normal, nothing more.
so, what happens when a curse you encounter induces a heat in you far worse than anything recorded in modern times?
+ alternatively. in which even a special grade sorcerer isn’t immune to the curse-induced heat of an omega — you, the partner he's pined for over the course of your entire friendship — forcing you and him to go back to your primal roots.
+ cw. forced A/B/O dynamics, lovesick! gojo, slight! geto x reader, sorcerer! reader, dubcon (technically sex pollen), reader is born an omega, gojo and geto are born alphas, gojo's infinity can't block scent for fic purposes, geto doesn’t turn au, use of restraints, mating call, mutual pining, it gets playful / lighthearted in the middle, implied 'medical' use of sex toys, dirty thoughts, lordosis, petnames (angel, love), pussy job, constant pov switches towards the end, cunnilingus, ass fingering, piv, cervix kisses, confessions, shared orgasm, creampie, knotting, no beta bye, 3.5k+ words, MDNI
+ masterlists. general ┆ jujutsu kaisen �� collab
♥︎ aki’s note. big thank you to raven (@raven-cincaide) for sprinting with me ♡ ++ this very late fic is part of my into the omegaverse collab ♡ please show some love to everybody’s amazing works when you can!
He came as soon as he heard. Plagued by his racing thoughts, Satoru stands still, chewing on the inside of his cheek as he watches you from behind the glass window. Though he appears to be calm, seeing you like this is torture.
“How long has she been in there?” Suguru puts his hands in his pockets, taking the spot next to Satoru.
“Too long,” he breathes. And it’s only been half a day. His 6 eyes have been agonizingly locked on your form the entire time, piercing blue eyes peering through the glass and into your poor disturbed soul. You’ve been crying non stop ever since they found you. Eyes glossy, pupils blasted, spewing incoherent words, skin damp and hot.
They needed to restrain your arms and legs to be able to perform tests on you, but that didn’t stop you from crossing your knees, relying on friction to rub your pussy as best as you can. All this, as your body wriggles beneath the harsh clinic lights. You’ve gone absolutely feral. Your cries are pitched an octave higher than what Satoru’s used to. And as much as he doesn’t want to believe it, it’s as if… “It’s as if she’s calling out to someone.”
“To you, you mean?” Suguru scoffs.
Paper seals secure the walls of your room. Remnants of the curse linger around your body and because of that, they’ve deemed it safer to assume only born-betas are allowed direct contact. For now, at least. Shoko says they don’t know if there are aftereffects — meaning, if exposure to a victim could also trigger a rut in an alpha. And now they’re dealing with pheromones, not just cursed energy, so infinity is out of the question. That means Shoko gets to stay with you, and the two born-alphas are to stay on this side until further notice.
Satoru hates it – being separated from you by a wall like this. Not like you weren’t already normally separated by one, considering your room in the dorms is right next to his. But he particularly hates how this renders him unable to barge in on you any time he wants.
Right now, he wants to annoy you. He wants to poke fun at you. He wants to pull your strings because he likes it when you get fake-mad. You’re cute when you do that. Plus, he uses it to his advantage knowing you can never actually stay mad at him for too long — a weakness the two of you share.
“Heard the report got it all wrong.” Suguru pats Satoru’s back. “Special grade 1, was it? Quite the leap from semi-grade 1.” Suguru shakes his head, chuckling in disbelief. He’s never seen his best friend so distraught. But Suguru reassures him, telling him not to worry and reminding him of the fact that, at the very least, “She’s alive and kicking. Well, kicking too hard for that matter. Those knots are gonna bruise.”
“She should’ve called me. Fucking idiot.” Satoru clicks his tongue.
They have brought in experts — historians, even. They have tried every omega medicine known to man. Emergency suppressants that were once obsolete are concocted that same day. Everything should’ve shown immediate effects. And yet, it’s almost laughable how it all seemed like they were only giving you placebo meds, forcing you to down so many in so little time. Since nothing has worked, Shoko sent them away.
What’s worse is, the curse is exorcised. And in the world of Jujutsu Sorcery, killing a curse usually takes all its enchantments with it. So, if the curse is dead and you’re still experiencing the worst heat known to man, they could damn well consider your revert permanent if they don’t do something about it quickly.
The two men jolt back upon smelling a very pronounced aroma of burnt cinnamon on Shoko who’s left the room for the first time in the last 6 hours. Her hair is slightly disheveled, slightly damp from sweat. And the circles around her eyes have grown visibly darker and heavier.
“Can’t imagine our forefathers going nuts over that stench.” Suguru lightens the mood, fanning his hand in front of his face. He blinks his tears dry as a result of inhaling a whiff of the strong odor.
“It’s not that bad.” Satoru scrunches his nose as he’s suddenly taken aback, though he’s not particularly repulsed by the scent. If anything, he’s immediately convinced it’s something he doesn’t mind living with. “Plus, I heard it’s slightly different for every omega.”
“Finally, some fresh fucking air,” Shoko murmurs as she leans on the glass, head thrown back as she lights up a cigarette. Apparently, she hasn’t had one since they brought you in. “Welp, tried everything. Even left her alone with toys to do—”
“Herself?” Suguru teases.
Satoru scratches his throat. “Did it- uhm… did it help?”
“Not one bit.”
“Maybe you… didn’t give her enough time?” Satoru nonchalantly suggests, pouting as he subconsciously takes notes for himself if he ever gets presented with the opportunity.
“I let her at it for an hour.” Shoko huffs out smoke in the direction opposite to the two men. “I even gave her… options, you know.”
Satoru mentally kicks himself as his thoughts run wild. He can still see the tip of the pink silicone popping out of one of the trays, girth not so different from his. He hates Shoko for doing a shitty job at concealing it because blood rushes to his cock just by looking at that thing, knowing it had gone inside you. He thinks about what other toys Shoko had you use — thinks about which one was able to make you cum the fastest, which one was your favorite?
Fuck. Now, he has to keep adjusting his stance, marching in place like a damn soldier till he manages to get his half-hard cock into a better position in his pants. Using his hands then and there is not an option for obvious reasons.
“Satoru.” Shoko’s tone becomes more serious. “You can drag this longer than it needs to be. But you know there’s only one surefire tried-and-tested-literally-by-millions-way to cure a heat.” She takes a long puff, blowing smoke in between words, embers flickering on the end of her half-done stick. “You up for it?”
“Don’t be stupid.” Of course he is.
Suguru and Shoko shoot each other knowing glances, the former raising an eyebrow as if to say ‘watch this’. “Satoru, If you’re not gonna do it, I wi—”
“I’ll fucking kill you,” Satoru spits, not letting his best friend finish his sentence. The two quickly exchange low fives, chuckling at the expense of their lovesick friend. Satoru turns to Shoko, paying no mind to his friends so blatantly enjoying themselves in the middle of a crisis. “You’re sure you’ve done everything you can?”
“Everything I can, yes. You’ve exhausted all the favors you can ask of me, it’s high time you deal with your own problems.” Shoko prods two fingers onto Satoru’s chest.
“Want her to want it,” Satoru speaks softly.
“Are you blind? Did your fucking 6 eyes stop working?” Shoko looks at Satoru, puzzled, as if she wonders why Satoru isn’t seeing what she’s seeing. “Oh, I’m pretty sure she wants it bad.”
“Want her to want me.”
Shoko rolls her eyes and disposes of her cigarette though it’s a couple more puffs away from when she usually stops. She’s at her limit. “Wait here.”
Trying to prove a point, she goes to the supply room and comes back with two handkerchiefs — a white one and a blue one. She then pats the white one with the sweat off of Satoru’s nape, and the other with Suguru��s. “Pray with me, boys. One of you’s gonna have to return to their roots.” She cracks her neck, preparing to head back in.
The sound of your cries increase and decrease in volume when Shoko opens and closes the door behind her.
“Shoko, Shoko, please! Make it stop! Make it stop! Make it—”
Shoko waves the blue handkerchief above your head, grabbing your attention for only a few seconds till you’re back to screaming in agony. She can almost hear Suguru scoffing on the other side. She then takes out the white cloth with Satoru’s scent, and like a moth to a flame, you’re instantly drawn to it. Your breaths have finally steadied. You take quick bouts of whiffs, head craning every which way she drags the piece of cloth.
She leaves you with the handkerchief after letting your arms and legs loose, allowing you to curl up in a ball as you desperately inhale Satoru’s scent. It’s the first thing that has calmed you in hours. Nonetheless, this relief is temporary. Pretty soon you’ll be needing something stronger. Something more potent. Something in its rawest form.
“S-satoru,” you breathe through the handkerchief, staring at the two-way mirror like a faint prayer to the god you know is there. “Shoko, please get me Satoru.” Your words are clear as day, and that’s the first coherent thing you’ve said all day.
Shoko’s eyes dart to where she’s sure Satoru stands. “Do you see it now?” she mouths.
Satoru’s jaw stiffens, stomach now a mangled mess of anticipation and guilt. On the one hand, he’s relieved. He’s not sure what he would’ve done if you’d reacted the same way to Suguru’s scent. On the other hand, he knows what’s going to happen now. Not like he didn’t see this coming.
…
Though she didn’t have to, Shoko chose to make a nest of Satoru’s clothes for you in his own bed. “Thought I’d at least make the effort to help make it romantic, no?”
Except nothing about this is romantic. Jujutsu dorm walls thankfully aren’t thin, but thin enough for him to hear your cries from behind his door.
Satoru takes a second to collect himself, getting square with the fact that this isn’t how he wanted your first time to go. He can smell you from where he stands, forcibly reminding him for every second he delays that you’re in there, waiting for him.
He’s played your first time over and over in his head as he fucked his fist — almost every morning in the shower, once or twice in your room when you were out on a mission, and many, many times in the very bed you’re nestled now. Out of the hundreds of scenarios he’s made up of him making love to you in his head, he’s never once pictured this.
His friends have pestered him about this for so long, urging him to take the first step or else Suguru — and on some occasions, Shoko — won’t hesitate to whisk you off your feet. But he tells them he has his reasons for constantly holding off. He says it’s because you’re perfect for him, and so he wanted your first to be perfect — plain and simple. He says it so matter-of-factly, too. But now, to hell with the perfect scenario because as it turns out, it’s mother nature herself who decides to give him one crazy hell of a push to make a move.
Satoru enters his room. Greeted with the raw and unbound fragrance of your heat, his heart pounds in his chest. He coos upon seeing you hugging his pillow, all plump and ready for him. Suddenly, it registers in his head that he’s seeing you naked for the first time, lying in his bed. “God, you’re so beautiful,” he says more to himself, trying to convince himself that this is real — that you’re real.
“‘M sorry, it hurts— hurts so bad, Satoru. ‘M sorry!” He’s sorry it has to be like this, too. But he’s not so sorry that you’d asked for him.
With dried up tears along your cheeks, and fresh ones in your eyes, your cried out voice croaks, “Satoru, help me please. I need you.” You roll on your belly, propping your forearms as you bury your face in his scent, whining into his pillow, back arching + ass perked up, as you shamelessly stroke your pussy to his face. “N-need you now, please, please, please?”
Fuck.
Even now, it melts his heart seeing you so full of want.
“Shh, shh, shh. I’m here aren’t I?”
Satoru doesn’t miss the way your hand grips the sheets as you watch him discard his clothes. He sees the absolute delight in your face, the flexing of your belly, the further bend of your back, the quicker strokes of your fingers around your clit. But it’s the sight of your nectar dripping out of you that finally makes him break.
With how hard he is and how much he wants to devour you like crazy, he could easily be mistaken for an alpha in a rut. He swears his chemical makeup has nothing to do with it. He just wants you that bad.
Suddenly, the space between you and him doesn’t exist. You moan out loud just by being touched by him. He engulfs you in his arms forcing you to sit up, hot skin against even hotter skin, your back pressed flush against his torso as he buries his face in the crook of your neck. And your slick — god, your honeyed slick — begins to coat his hard cock speared between your legs and along your puffy folds.
Fuck.
“Sweet angel.” His eyes roll back as he takes in all of your scent.
His cock twitches between your legs, pre-cum starting to drip off his tip. He feels a tingling sensation in the pit of his stomach as soon as he gets into contact with your slick. Your touch is so fucking electric. One hand wraps around your stomach while the other reaches for your breast, cupping and kneading the soft flesh, feeling your thuds of a heartbeat beneath his palm. You smell so fucking good upclose, your scent keeps hooking and hooking him in, and taking care of you is all he cares about. That's all that matters. He’s holding you now and yet he’s unable to satiate this mad need to be closer to you. He needs to be closer. He needs to make love to you. Needs to be in you—
“S-Satoru.” You guide the hand on your breast, intertwining with his fingers, pressing harder, rougher, against your skin. “You feel so good, Satoru. Please move. N-need more.”
Satoru releases a deep groan in your ear when you bring your knees together, locking his cock between your legs as you begin to grind your pussy on his erection, nectar lubing your every sway.
“E-easy, eaaasy,” Satoru’s voice is low and breathy. He hisses with every roll of your hips, breath hitching as your pussy drags his foreskin back and forth, balls kissing the back of your thighs. Mind hazy with want, he presses his cheek on yours, planting open mouthed and sloppy kisses on the side of your face.
“Not so fast!” Satoru holds your hips in place when you start to pick up the pace, making you whine, “Wha–”
“Too fast, I’m sorry.” Satoru trails apologetic kisses along your jaw. “Not there- don’t want to cum there.”
He apologizes as a tinge of guilt prickles his throat seeing you so utterly vulnerable. Your eyes plead for him to fill you then and there but he needs this moment to last as long as possible, even if it means prolonging your agony.
“S-Satoru, can’t wait any longer!” You try to move your hips but they’re locked in place.
“No.” He says, firmly, and it hurts to tell you that. “Not yet.” Tears well up in your eyes as your chest heaved at the height of your confusion. Your mouth opens, trying to find words, but before you get to complain, he gives you a soft, chaste kiss — your very first one, he realizes — and tells you, “Get down for me.”
And with tears in your eyes, you oblige. He supposes this is the work of the reemergence of your makeup and raging hormones, making you so pliant and submissive, you’re willing to do his bidding even when you’re on the verge of insanity — when, before this, you always had a stubbornness in you he’d always been fond of. But then again, at this very moment, you’re desperate. And you’re desperate for him.
“Satoru, I don’t know what you’re up to b-but please, don’t take long- oh!” Your protests are quickly replaced with cries as you feel a soft, wet muscle slide across your folds. He’s always had that habit of not letting you finish. To think it’s something he takes to bed with him makes your stomach coil. “Fuck!”
Hot breath fans your folds as he splits your slit open with his tongue, and all you can do is shudder in place, wallowing in the extreme pleasure that dozens of toys weren’t able to give you. You’re practically leaking on his face, honey dripping down his chin, the tip of his nose pressing into your ass.
His tongue squelches with every lick, twisting your core in knots with every line drawn. And then it’s as if Satoru’s lips are sealed around your clit, puckering and sucking on the sensitive bud.
“Satoru, oh god. ‘Toru, so good, ‘s so fucking good~” Your eyebrows furrow, lips pursing as he relentlessly flicks his tongue on your clit.
“Oh!” You scream when a honeyed digit enters your ass, thumb hooking and pressing hard against your g-spot, all while his tongue remains fixated on your clit. “Fuck- mmm!”
You can’t help but mewl and cuss into your first orgasm — the first one he granted you, that is — wave of pleasure washing across your body as he eats out your high. And while it’s a sensation that gives you a sense of satisfaction, you’re left wanting more. You’re left needing more.
“Please fill me- can’t wait any longer- please, alpha~”
Oh, now you’ve done it.
“Sorry, love.” Satoru pulls you back into his chest and cups your cheek, making you look over your shoulder and into his face. “Neither can I.”
“Sato- Oh!” Gagged by the feeling of friction in your aching walls, the very first one you had welcomed since your heat, you’re at a loss for words when his cock enters you, bottoming out straight away. Your mouth forms an ‘o’ and he instinctively closes the gap, savoring your mouth, and with every click and swirl of your tongues, he thinks you are probably the softest, most delicate thing he’s ever tasted.
He knows he’s screwed, tasting you for the first time, knowing he’ll never want anything other than you, your lips, your pussy, this feeling ever again.
You feel as if every pump of his cock scratches that stubborn itch that’s spread across your pussy since your heat. And every satisfying ram of his hips kisses your cervix, bringing you closer and closer to your high, as if this — his cock, and the feeling of his body rocking your own — has been what’s missing in your life.
“Scream for me, angel,” Satoru grumbles against your ear as he feels himself nearing his own climax. Suddenly, his mouth is back on yours, kissing you, with you purring against his lips as he fucks you through your shared high.
“I–” When his pace comes to a full stop, you know what’s about to come. And he doesn’t know what to say. Shoko’s already briefed him on what’ll happen to an alpha who cums in an omega in heat, not that he doesn’t know what a knot is. He just doesn’t know what to expect. Still, he wants you to take it. Even now, he wants you to want it. But he studies that curious look on your face, and as he scrambles for words, it seems it’s your turn to finally shut him up.
“I love you, Satoru.”
Satoru chuckles. More to himself.
“I love you, too.” Satoru, with breaths uneven, relaxes his forehead against yours. Satoru steadies himself, and pretty soon, you collapse in his arms as his knot locks in your core.
...
"Hey," Satoru breaks the silence. "You know... taking my knot like that means you practically asked me to marry you."
"Shut up."
—
Shoko alternates between looking at you and flipping the pages of the report in her clipboard. It seems that you’re technically back to normal but she’s got that look in her face as if a couple of words are stuck behind her throat.
“It’s fine. Hit me with it,” you prompt. “What is it?”
“Well, you’re now a full-blown omega is what it is,” Shoko says without an ounce of concern in her voice. “But seeing as you’ve got… help now,” Shoko’s eyes dart to Satoru who’s standing in the corner, “there’s really not much to do about it.”
“Is that so?” You chuckle at the playful tension between Satoru and Shoko.
“You’re ‘help’, by the way,” Shoko addresses Satoru.
“A big one, too,” he adds.
“Keep it in your pants.” Shoko puts her clipboard aside and scratches her temple. “Still, it’s insane that this is what finally brought you two together.”
Shoko’s words put a longing, knowing smile to your face. "This silly guy waited too long."
“Hey, if that’s what it took. Who am I to complain?” Satoru shrugs, ego fluffed by the thought that you’re finally his. And the fact that he and you are the only active alpha and omega in the world? How special is that?
pspsps. reblogs and comments are appreciated ♥︎
#jjk gojo#gojo#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#jjk x reader#gojo smut#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen fanfic#!love letters#!jjk#!gojo#!holic#!collabs
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starting a new wip ✌️ it’s trc this time so that should be fun
#my wips#trc#the raven cycle#trc fic#pre canon gansey fic#(<- gonna use that as a wip tag until i title it)#i have too many wips already but here we are!
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Me, thinking I’m smart exploring Boston/Cambridge/Surroundings for fic inspo: 😏😌😘
Me 4 days later not understanding why Adam Parrish would EVER want to leave: 😳🧐😲😨
#I have flown too close to the sun#how will I ever write canon compliant fic ever again?#pynch#Adam Parrish#TD3#the dreamer trilogy#the raven cycle#TRC#Ronan lynch
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"i'll teach you" with henry and noah for the ship ask game maybe
hmm I struggled because I don’t have a lot of thoughts on them together but here’s my attempt:
“So it took them how long to figure out you were a ghost?” Henry asked.
Noah huffed. “A couple of years. And I kept telling them too!”
Henry whistled. “Man, you’d think with all that supernatural spelunking under his belt he’d be better at playing ghostbusters.”
Noah rolled his eyes. “I love Gansey, but he rarely knows what’s going on around him.” He paused for a second, like he was listening to something Henry couldn’t hear.
A thought occurred to Henry. “Can you read minds?”
Noah hesitated, then said “It’s not quite that way. When Blue is around sometimes I can hear distinct thoughts, here are clearer to me than anyone else’s. Otherwise I just get impressions and … feelings.”
“I don’t suppose there’s a chance you could teach me?” Every time Henry had been asked the question of what superpower he’d want, his go to was reading minds. Occasionally if he thought that would freak people out he went with invisibility. The fact that Noah had both those qualities at his disposal intrigued him.
“I’ll teach you,” Noah paused a beat. “To mind your own business. Besides, I know you really want to know what Gansey thinks of you, and I’m not going to tell you.”
Henry huffed. “Fine. Can you teach me to play that video game then?”
(Send me a char or pairing + three words and I’ll write a scene based on it)
#when in doubt on how to write a dynamic in trc think about both chars relationships with Gansey#some of both their relationships with Blue too. and also both of them have Adam foilisms#s speaks#asks#trc#the raven cycle#henry cheng#noah czerny#my fic#mayhaps-to-dream
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Conquer
Part 2 of 5
Series Masterlist
Series Summary: The king intends to take a bride. You just never thought it would be you. (Soulmate AU where Loki won)
Chapter Summary: It’s no surprise that Loki has a gift for talking dirty and you wish that it didn’t work as well as it does. You wish that—for example—it were a little more challenging for him to talk you into letting him get you off in the limo on your way to a gala event hosted by the Swedish government.
Pairing: Loki x Female Reader
Tag List: I don’t have a tag list for this fic, sorry! The best way to hear about updates is to follow me on Tumblr or subscribe to the fic on AO3.
Chapter Warnings: Smut, 18+, Minors DNI, enemies to lovers, dirty talk, praise kink, edging, teasing, p in v sex, vaginal fingering, orgasm delay, semi-public sex, light Dom/sub. (see series masterlist for series warnings)
A/N: I realize that the GIF I'm using for this chapter is TVA!Loki, but the attitude is very much in keeping with this chapter, so I decided to forgo accuracy in favor of thirst. Also, you may be thinking "Part 2 of 5? I thought this was going to be 3 chapters!" Me too. Welcome to what it's like being in my brain: even I don't know what's going on here.
The wedding night isn’t the end of the sex, of course.
The immediate, sharp need for your first coupling is gone, but there’s a dull and persistent ache that keeps you coming back to his bed every night (and several times during the day). Loki is equally ravenous, if not more so.
While you’ve come to terms with the fact that you’re going to fuck him, you still don’t like being the one to initiate sex. It sounds silly, but it feels like admitting to a vulnerability that you’re not prepared to acknowledge, let alone act on.
The problem is that your sex drive has skyrocketed since the wedding.
You’ve heard about this happening—the saying soulbonds are meant to be consummated, but some are more thorough than others didn’t come out of nowhere. You just didn’t think it would be a problem for you, especially once you found out who your soulmate was.
You were wrong about this, of course—you are constantly horny. Your mind is a cineplex of perversion, constantly playing memories of the times that he has fucked you, ways he might fuck you next, his hands, his lips, his tongue, his annoyingly perfect cock. It makes you want to run your brain through the washing machine, like a couple of Tide pods and an extra rinse cycle might fix this.
But the part that drives you crazy is that he always seems to know when you’re in these moods and he always manages to claim the upper hand. It is—like so many things with Loki—profoundly irritating.
It’s all physical—your conversations are limited to the mundane or the utterly filthy. It’s no surprise that Loki has a gift for talking dirty and you wish that it didn’t work as well as it does. You wish that—for example—it were a little more challenging for him to talk you into letting him get you off in the limo on your way to a gala event hosted by the Swedish government.
You can feel his gaze caressing your body as you walk down the stairs to meet him. Your dress is gold and glittery, and hugs your curves while the slit sneaks just high enough that you know the fashion blogs will call it daring. You keep your eyes on your feet and your hand on the railing as you navigate the stairs in your heels. Normally, Loki would comment on that—something about how you needed proper education in comportment, you were a queen, queens don’t stare at their feet, people expected elegance, blah, blah, blah. Tonight, though, he’s silent as he takes you in, which you know means that he’s particularly enchanted by how you look. For a brief moment, you allow yourself to feel sexy and confident, to enjoy the fact that the most powerful man on the planet has been rendered speechless by how you look.
Are you ridiculously horny? Sure, but you’ve got it under control. You can hold out for an evening and you’re pretty sure Loki hasn’t figured it out. If he had, he almost certainly would have said something inappropriate when he offered you his arm. He’s probably going to be distracted by the gala anyway. Why had you ever doubted yourself?
When the two of you get into the limo, you remember why.
The moment the door shuts behind you, Loki is pulling you close, his hands cupping your breasts and then sliding down to your thighs while his lips latch on to the spot where your neck and shoulder meet.
“What are you doing?” you ask, as though his intentions are in any way unclear.
“You need to come. I can smell you.” He’s hiking up the fabric of your dress.
Well. So much for him not noticing.
Your cunt clenches. “We’re in public.”
“Those windows are tinted and the partition is up.” His breath is warm on your neck as the fabric of your dress pools around your waist.
“I can still wait.”
“Oh, I don’t think you can.” His fingers slip between your legs (when did you spread your legs for him?), gently grazing the gusset of your underwear, which you know is embarrassingly wet. “Soaked already,” he breathes, rubbing your clit through the thin fabric. “You need to come.”
“I-I c-can—I can wait until—oh fuck.”
He pushes the fabric of your underwear aside and lightly teases your clit with the tip of his finger.
“You can’t,” he rasps, lightly nipping at your earlobe. “You’re such a greedy, needy little thing. Your cunt is insatiable.”
He presses his first three fingers together and rubs your clit in a big, broad circle that makes your back arch.
“Fuck,” you breathe, your hands flexing against the seat. “Fuck, just like that.”
“I thought you said you could wait?” he says with that mocking lilt to his voice, the one that makes you simultaneously want to punch him in the face and also ride him hard and fast and a little rough.
“Shut up,” you grit out.
He laughs low in your ear. “Oh, you don’t mean that, I know you love it when I talk you through it.”
You hate that he’s right.
“You love hearing about how tight and wet you are, how hard I am for you.” He drops his voice lower. “How hard I’m going to fuck you.”
You can’t help the quiet moan that falls from your lips.
“Yes, you love it when I talk to you like this,” he purrs. “And I love hearing what an utterly filthy, wicked girl you are.”
You whimper, despite your best efforts to keep quiet.
“Oh, I like that little noise,” he says, increasing his pace ever so slightly. “Let me hear you.”
“I hate you so much.”
You’ve said this to him before and like all the other times, he simply laughs. “Hate me all you like, darling, but you and I both know that you love what I do to you.”
You bite your lip and try to focus on the pleasure that’s rising in your hips.
“Has anyone ever made you come as hard as I do?” he muses, like he’s just making casual conversation. “From the way that you scream and beg for it, I imagine that there haven’t been very many that were capable. Your cunt has quite clearly been neglected.”
You’re going to ignore what he’s saying. That’s what you’re going to do. There’s no reason to listen to any of what he’s saying.
“The truth is that you need me, don’t you?” he says, nipping at your ear. “You need me because I know exactly what to do to sate your needy little cunt. I know exactly how to make you scream.”
You hate how close you are, hate how the impending rush of your orgasm has basically rendered you speechless, save for a few incoherent whimpers.
He brings his lips close to your ear, lowering his voice to a growl. “What would those pitiful Midgardians say if they knew their queen was such a needy little slut?”
Instead of delivering a stern rebuke, you come hard. Incredibly hard—it is arguably one of the most intense orgasms he’s given you yet, blazing through your body with a ferocity that leaves you shaking in its wake.
And he notices.
“Oh, you liked that, didn’t you?” he purrs as he rubs you through the aftershocks. “I felt how hard you came, how utterly desperate you are for me to fuck you.”
“Loki, please,” you breathe.
He tugs at your underwear. “Take this off.”
Your first instinct is to challenge him, but the fabric is now uncomfortably damp and you desperately need him to fuck you, so you lift your hips and slide your underwear down and off your legs without any complaint. He takes it from you and sticks it in his pocket.
You expect to hear the clink of his belt buckle followed by his silky smooth voice ordering you to sink down on his unfairly perfect cock. Even though you’ve just come, you want more. You always do with him.
(You decide not to think too much about that last part).
Instead, though, he smooths his hair and settles back into his seat, looking out the window. After a moment, you clear your throat expectantly.
He glances at you, utterly casual. “What is it?”
Your eyes narrow. He’s playing dumb and you both know it.
“You made me take off my underwear,” you say, biting back a sharper reply.
“I did.”
“So…fuck me.”
He gives an amused little chuckle that makes your palm itch to slap him. “Darling, we’re in public, that would be unseemly.”
You roll your eyes before you can stop yourself. “You’re full of it.”
His gaze turns smoldering and stern. “And if you want to be full of my cock later tonight, you’ll change your attitude.”
You’re not sure if it’s the absence of underwear that makes you feel more aroused than usual or if he’s awakened some latent perversion you were previously unaware of. Possibly, it’s both.
Your breath hitches and he smiles like he knows he has the upper hand.
“Do you want that?” he says. “Do you want me to fill your tight little cunt with my big cock?”
You’re so far gone that you find yourself nodding before the thought of being contrary can even cross your mind.
“Well, then,” he says, flicking an invisible speck of dust from his tuxedo jacket, “you’re going to have to earn it.”
You huff out an irritated sigh and yank the skirt of your dress back down. “You’re an ass,” you say with a scowl.
“And you’re going to do exactly as I tell you or you won’t be coming at all.”
You stare at him, lips parted in the start of a complaint.
“And however much your pretty cunt is aching right now, I imagine it will be twice as worse tomorrow with no release,” he says. “If I’m feeling generous, of course. I could always make you wait longer.”
You close your mouth, biting back the urge to scowl.
He smirks. “That’s my good girl.”
Your cunt throbs. By the end of the night, your thighs will surely be sticky with your own arousal.
“This is unfair,” you grumble, crossing your arms and sitting back in your seat.
“Behave,” he says as you approach a rather impressive set of gates. “We’re almost there.”
A flick of his wrist sends seidr racing along your skin, smoothing your hair, straightening your dress, and fixing the smudge of lipstick at the corner of your mouth.
Your underwear remains in his pocket.
You have a feeling it’s going to be a long evening.
The Minister for Finance is giving a presentation. You’re not entirely sure that you would have been able to follow it under normal circumstances, but certainly not with Loki’s hand up your dress.
The two of you are seated at your own table—it’s one of the more stupid formalities he insists on, though you suppose it’s advantageous in this instance. His actions are obscured by the table and tablecloth and probably a little magic, but your heart is still racing with the thrill of it. His movements have been slow and deliberate, and the result is that he’s effectively been edging you for the duration of this forty-five minute presentation.
It feels incredible; it’s agony. You love it; you hate it.
“You’re being a very good girl,” Loki murmurs to you at one point and that alone nearly sends you over the edge.
“You’re a jackass,” you whisper back to him.
He chuckles. “If you want me to let you come once we get home, I’d suggest changing your tone, my love.”
You resist the urge to scowl, but only barely. “You made me come in the limo over here because you said I couldn’t wait,” you point out. “What happened to that philosophy?”
“It was supplanted by a desire to see what happens when I tease you for several hours.” A wicked smile curls at his lips. “Besides, I love how tight and desperate your cunt feels when I make you beg for me.”
You always come hardest when he makes you beg for him. You’d never admit it, though.
“I’d think you’d be more concerned about getting caught,” you say. “What do you think that would do to your image?”
“Oh, I think it would do wonders for my image,” he says. “Attentively tending to my wife’s needs despite potential social embarrassment? It’s rather feminist of me, don’t you think?”
“Okay, first of all, that is not what femini—” Your voice cuts out as he rolls his finger in a particularly devastating circle.
“What was that, my love?” he asks, voice thick with faux concern, his true intent easily betrayed by his shit eating grin. “You seem distracted.”
You’re not entirely sure if you’re tensing your muscles in anticipation of an orgasm or in an effort to stave it off. “You’re awful.”
His voice drops. “But I’m making you feel so very good, aren’t I?”
You take a deep breath, trying to soothe the tightening knot in your belly, even as your body is begging you to rush toward it.
“Aren’t I?” His tone turns stern and you hear the implied order loud and clear.
“Yes,” you bite out.
“Yes what?”
You swallow. You’re starting to get close, closer than he’s let you get so far. “Yes, you’re making me feel good.”
He smirks. “You’re getting close, aren’t you?”
You nod, taking another deep breath through your nose. Keep it together.
“I could let you come,” he muses. “Everyone’s watching the presentation. You could be quiet, couldn’t you?” His pace increases just slightly, enough for you to start to feel the tempting, shimmery tendrils of release. “Do you want that, lovely?”
It’s not a good idea, but you nod anyway.
“I had no idea you were so filthy.” His fingers are massaging your clit more firmly and you bite back a gasp because you know it won’t be long. You’re trying to keep a straight face, but you’re struggling. You are so deliciously close.
“Are you going to come for me?” he asks quietly. He knows the answer.
You nod, not trusting your voice.
But just as you’re about to start to tip over the edge, Loki’s hand retreats and the building pressure in your hips diminishes back to that steady, throbbing ache just as the Minister for Finance concludes his presentation.
Loki is smirking like he expected this. “Ah. Unfortunate timing.”
You may kill him.
“You did that on purpose, you ass,” you hiss at him.
“Oh, you’ll thank me for it later,” he says, his voice dropping low.
You scowl at him, though you suspect he’s probably right.
You get a slight reprieve during dinner, but only in the sense that Loki’s hand is no longer up your dress. Your aching arousal remains, coating the inside of your thighs. Your heartbeat seems to be pulsing in your clit, the muscles of your cunt aching as they clench repeatedly around nothing.
While his hand is no longer up your dress, Loki continues to be as unhelpful as possible.
“Shall I let you unravel on my tongue?” he murmurs to you during the main course. “Or do you need my cock first?”
“I think you need to stop talking,” you say as evenly as you can muster.
“Whatever for?” he asks with the sort of feigned innocence that tells you he knows exactly what he’s doing. “Surely you’re not concerned that I’m going to make you come simply by telling you what I want to do to you.”
You take a slow sip of your water.
“Or perhaps that idea appeals to you?” he asks, dropping his voice even lower. “Do you want me to make you come in front of all of these people?”
There’s something about the idea that’s admittedly appealing in a taboo sort of way, though you aren’t quite sure you actually want to pursue it or if you’re just so desperate that even objectively bad ideas sound good.
“Truly, I doubt you could keep quiet,” he says. “You and I both know how much you like to scream for me and I’ve been teasing you for what, three hours now? But perhaps that’s what you want. You were about to come for me earlier. Perhaps you want them all to know what a needy little sl—ah, Stefan! So good to see you again.”
Loki has seamlessly directed his attention to the Swedish official who has approached your table. His ability to be charming and personable is irritating, particularly when he’s often been uttering absolute filth to you mere seconds before. Meanwhile, your brain has completely short circuited—your thoughts stopped being anywhere near coherent when he started touching you under the table during that presentation and your cunt is pulsing. You manage a polite smile and a pleasantly vague expression that you hope hides the fact that all you can think about is Loki throwing you down on the table and fucking you until you can’t walk straight and you’ve screamed yourself hoarse.
“You conducted yourself quite well,” Loki says softly once the man leaves. “I’d never have guessed that you’re hiding such a needy, sloppy cunt under that dress.”
You take a deep breath. “What’s to stop me from slipping off somewhere and taking care of things myself?”
His eyes flash a little dangerously and you hate how much it thrills you. “If you do that, I’ll see to it that you don’t come for a week. At least.”
You are irritated with him, certainly, but you are far more irritated with yourself for being even remotely aroused by his words.
“You’re insufferable,” you hiss instead.
Loki smirks and leans in to whisper in your ear. “We’ll see how you feel a few hours from now when I’m buried in your tight cunt.” His breath ghosts over your ear and it takes everything in you not to shiver. “I suspect I’ll find you much more agreeable. You always are when you need to be fucked.” His voice drops even lower. “And I know how much you need it.”
Your legs are shaking and you wonder how you’re going to make it through the rest of the evening.
You almost come during the concert.
It was probably easier for them to set up the orchestra on the same stage as the presentation, but it means that you’re still sitting at the same table as before, which gives Loki more than enough cover to continue touching you. His hand is creeping back up your dress before the oboe even plays the tuning note and while he’s still going slowly, it’s been four and a half hours and your body is aching for release in a way you have rarely felt.
His fingertip skates across your clit just a little too quickly and firmly and suddenly, you’re poised right on the edge. One more stroke of his fingers, just one more slight movement and you’ll come.
It’s a split second decision, so quick you can scarcely think twice about it. You desperately want to come, but even though you almost let it happen earlier, you know that a stifled public orgasm isn’t really what you want. You want him to hear you scream—you don’t want to hold back.
And you want to be good for him. You want him to reward you for being good, you want to be his good girl—
You shake your head to dismiss that thought and grab his wrist in a silent warning. Quickly, he moves his hand away, sliding it to your knee. Your cunt shudders and aches, the pulsing throb of your arousal even stronger than before.
He brushes his lips against your ear. “Oh, very good, darling. You’ll be rewarded for that.”
“You could reward me now and take me home,” you say pointedly, though it would probably be more effective if your voice wasn’t so shaky.
He chuckles, draping his arm around your shoulders. Every so often, you’ve seen a candid photo of the two of you in People or one of the other celebrity magazines and you’re always taken aback by how normal you look. You imagine that it would be the same if someone were to take a photo right now—you’d look like just another couple cuddling and canoodling instead of…whatever it is you actually are. Soulmates who hate each other but fuck like it’s their job and the rent is due? There’s no easy way to classify your relationship, which you suppose is for the best: this is not the sort of thing that should be common enough to have its own word.
“We still have quite a bit to go.” He brings his index finger—the same one that had just been up your dress—up to his lips and closes his eyes like he’s tasting something divine. “Norns, I can taste how desperate you are.”
You cross your legs in the hope that it will alleviate the pulsing ache between your thighs (it doesn’t). “You’re not helping.”
“Of course I’m not,” he says. “I told you, I want you begging for me by the end of the night.”
“How have I not already exceeded that threshold?”
He smirks. “I like to be thorough.”
Five minutes later, his hand is back between your thighs.
“Let’s try that again,” he murmurs. “Do you think you’ll be able to resist a second time?”
Somehow, you do—and two more times after that. By the end of the concert, your heart is pounding, your legs feel like rubber, your cunt is dripping, and you’d easily sell your soul for an orgasm.
“You’re doing so well, darling,” says Loki. He’s been full of praise and filthy promises and you can’t decide if that makes it better or worse.
“Can we please go home?”
He chuckles. “Of course not, that would be rude.”
“I have a hard time believing you’re concerned about rudeness, considering where your hands have been this evening,” you say with a pointed look.
“You wound me.” He stands and offers you his hand. You take it grudgingly, your legs wobbling slightly. “Now. Come help me charm the Minister for Defense. I need him to be much more cooperative about sharing intelligence.”
The only good thing about schmoozing with Swedish officials is that Loki can’t have his hand up your dress while doing so. Even so, he still finds ways to be constantly touching you—a hand on your lower back, your elbow, your shoulder, your waist. These things shouldn’t be erotic, but he somehow manages to make them so. Every brush of his fingers against your bare skin is agony: you are burning for him.
You watch the clock tick through another hour and a half while trying not to let anyone on to the fact that you’re keen to leave. Time feels like it’s dragging—even when the event officially ends, it still takes another thirty-seven minutes for you to say your farewells and make your way out to the front where your limo is waiting.
Your legs are shaking as Loki helps you into the limo. He slides into the seat next to you and you find yourself leaning into him, unable to resist any longer.
The door shuts.
“Loki—” you start to say.
“When we get home,” he says promptly.
“You can’t possibly—”
“Oh, I can.” He pulls you into his lap. “I’ve been hard for you all evening,” he purrs in your ear, settling you so that the thick column of his cock presses hard against your ass. “Do you know how many times I nearly dragged you off to some empty room to take you up against the wall?” He brings his mouth down against your neck, teeth pressing against your skin just hard enough to almost hurt. You tilt your head to the side to give him better access, guiding his hands to your spread thighs.
“Do you know why I didn’t?” he murmurs against your skin.
“Because you make terrible choices?” you say before you can think it through.
His low laugh rumbles deliciously against your throat. “No.” His hands slip underneath the hem of your dress, fingertips skating along the tender skin of your inner thigh. Your hips roll forward almost unconsciously, your breath hitching.
“I didn’t because I know that you need to scream for me,” he says. “Just as much as I need to hear you.” His fingertip grazes your slit. “And you know that we can’t do that properly in the car.” His finger strokes your clit and you moan. “Poor thing,” he murmurs, tracing a slow circle over the sensitive skin. “I don’t think that I’ve ever made you this wet.”
“Loki—”
“I’m not giving you permission to come yet,” he murmurs, adding just a little more pressure. “I need you to be good for just a little longer.”
You let out a whine that you’re not at all proud of as he moves his hand away to gently massage your inner thighs. “Loki, please.”
“Be good.” His voice promises pleasure and punishment and everything in between and you feel drunk with desire.
“I’ve been so good,” you say, bringing his hand back to your cunt. “Please just let me come.”
“When we get home.”
“Just once. Please.”
He chuckles and brings his lips up to your ear. “You know that I’m going to take care of you,” he murmurs, his voice low and soothing. “You know I always take care of your needy cunt. I always make you come. You just need to wait a little longer.”
“I need to come now.”
“Think about how good it’s going to feel if you wait just a little longer.”
“It would feel good now.”
“It will feel even better in our bed.” He rolls his fingers in a slow circle on your clit. “You know it will.”
You whimper, rolling your hips with his hand.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this desperate,” he says. “I’m rather partial to it.”
“Don’t get used to it,” you grumble.
“Oh, I’d advise you watch your tone, darling,” he says low in your ear, sliding a finger inside you, his thumb taking up the rhythm on your clit. “I don’t want to deny you, but I may have to if you keep being so pert.”
As if to make a point, he slides another finger inside of you and you find yourself once again on the edge. You grab his wrist, your breath coming in shallow gasps as you try to hold back the rising tide within you.
“Oh, good fucking girl,” he growls and the pride in his voice makes your cunt clench hard on his retreating fingers. “You want to come so badly, but you’re being so good waiting for my permission.”
“God, this had better be worth it,” you say as you wait for the pulsing ache between your thighs to recede.
“It will be,” he murmurs against your neck. “You know it will be.” He shifts you in his lap so you face him and guides your hand to his cock. “Do you feel how hard you’ve made me? I’m aching for you.”
You rub his shaft, working your way up to catch the tab of his zipper between your fingers. He looks at you, eyes hungry, a smirk curling at his lips.
Slowly, you pull down the zipper.
“Oh you wicked thing,” he purrs, a low groan escaping him as you wrap your hand around his shaft and slowly begin stroking him. He’s rock hard and throbbing, and your hand quickly grows slick with his precome.
You lean in, brushing your lips against his ear. “I want you to fuck me,” you say, flicking your tongue against his earlobe.
He chuckles. “Are you trying to flip the tables on me, darling?”
You’re a little miffed that he figured that out so quickly. “Would that be so bad if I was?”
He laughs again. “You’re adorable.” He slides a hand along your inner thigh and back under your dress. “But I think we both know who’s really in charge here.”
Even the possibility of his hand touching your cunt has your breath quickening and your hand faltering in its rhythm on his cock.
You’re not about to admit defeat, though.
“Don’t you want to fuck me?” you say, trying to keep the quaver out of your voice. You give his cock a few long, indulgent strokes. “We’re nearly there already. All I’d need to do is move a little closer.”
He chuckles, his hand sliding up to lightly tease your folds. “I would have made you warm my cock the whole ride back,” he says casually, like he’s commenting on the weather, “but I don’t think you could have done it without coming. You’re too sensitive.”
Your lips part like you have something to say, but all rational thought and the entirety of the English language has fled your brain and even more arousal is pooling between your legs.
Loki smirks like he knows all of this and he briefly strokes you from your entrance to your clit before withdrawing. “Ah, we’re nearly home,” he says, moving your hand away and patting your thigh before tucking himself back into his trousers. “Let’s make ourselves presentable, shall we?”
You climb off his lap and straighten your dress, but don’t even bother trying to fix your hair or makeup. You stumble out of the car a minute later, hoping that you don’t look like you’ve spent the entire evening poised on the brink of orgasm.
Loki, of course, is annoyingly put together. He wraps an arm around your waist and leads you forward.
“Oh, the things I’m going to do to you when we get to our rooms,” he says under his breath as you make your way into the foyer.
“That had better be a promise,” you say.
“I thought we established that I’m the one who gives you orders—”
“We established nothing—”
One of his advisors—Sigurd, the same one who spoke to you in the hotel when he found you—is approaching Loki at a brisk clip.
“Your majesty—”
Loki barely takes his eyes off of you. “Later,” he says, waving a hand in Sigurd’s direction.
“Sire, it’s urgent.”
Your heart sinks. Loki stops and turns to Sigurd, eyes sharp, mouth pulled into a firm line. “It had better be.”
Despite the intensity of Loki’s expression, Sigurd looks unbothered and remarkably calm. “We received new intelligence on the matter you inquired about earlier, your majesty.”
Loki’s expression darkens and you realize with a sinking sensation that he has to go deal with whatever this is. “A moment,” he says to Sigurd before turning to you.
He lowers his voice so that only you can hear him. “Go to our rooms,” he murmurs. “I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
You nod and he leans in, brushing his lips against your temple. “Be good for me.”
A thrill runs through you.
By the time you get back to your rooms, though, you’re a little annoyed. He’s been teasing you for hours and when you finally get home, he suddenly has another work thing?
It would almost be funny if it wasn’t so frustrating.
Though admittedly, he did look pretty surprised and annoyed by Sigurd’s sudden appearance. It’s probably not fair to blame him for that.
Probably.
You take your time getting undressed, mainly in the hope that it will somehow hasten his return or trick you into thinking time is passing quickly. Not that you’re looking forward to him returning for any reason other than sex. You still hate him—you just really need him to fuck you. That’s all it is.
You hesitate for a long time over the collection of silk nightgowns in your wardrobe. Should you put something on? Should you just wait naked on the bed? A silky green number catches your eye. He’d probably like that. He’s pretty predictable when it comes to that sort of thing—put on his colors and he goes feral. With any luck you won’t be wearing it for very long, but you might as well do what you can to facilitate that outcome.
You contemplate underwear and decide there’s little point, given that tonight’s set is still tucked into his pocket.
You situate yourself in the middle of your bed and try not to think about your throbbing cunt. It would be so easy to get yourself off, but you know that it won’t be as good.
You need him.
You try to ignore the thought. It’s just physical. That’s all it is. You’re on edge from being teased all evening. It doesn’t mean anything.
You wait.
It’s late when you finally hear the door click open, followed by the tap of his dress shoes on the floor.
You sit up in bed, your eyes roving greedily over him. His suit jacket is gone and his tie is draped around his neck, shirtsleeves rolled up. You are loath to admit it, but it’s incredibly hot.
Before you can even get any words out, he’s striding across the room, eyes hungrier than you’ve ever seen them. His clothes disappear the second he hits the bed, followed swiftly by your nightgown. Seconds later, he’s on top of you, mouth seeking yours, cock pressing insistently against your stomach. Your hands are just as greedy, skimming up his back and combing through his hair.
“Have you been good for me?” he murmurs as he nudges your thighs apart.
“Yes.”
“Did you touch yourself?” he asks, his voice stern.
“No,” you say.
He knows you’re not lying and the hungry smile he gives you almost makes it all feel worth it. “Good girl,” he growls. “Do you want me to fuck you now?”
“Yes,” you say breathlessly, your legs wrapping around his waist as he drags his cock through your slickness. “Please.”
He chuckles as he lines himself up at your entrance. “I know, darling, I’m going to take such good care of you.”
Your cunt is so slick and sensitive from his hours of teasing that just the act of him sliding inside of you feels like you’ve reached your own personal nirvana.
“Oh, fuck.” Your voice comes out in a whimper and your legs tighten around his waist to hold him in place because he feels so overwhelmingly good.
Loki lets out a low groan as he eases inside you, catching his lower lip between his teeth as his brow furrows. “Perfect.” He leans in to kiss you as he starts to move. His first thrust is slow but even so, it draws a whimper from your throat. He’s always felt good, but this is transcendent.
“Oh god, please don’t stop,” you gasp.
“I won’t, my love.” His voice is tender as he moves with an aching, slow precision. “Not until you’ve had your fill.”
For the first time this evening, you let down your guard. Every time he’s touched you tonight—even before the gala in the limo—you’ve had to hold back to some degree. You haven’t been able to give into it, to let yourself be completely unbound and unguarded. But now when he’s moving inside of you, you have the freedom to just be and feel and it’s exquisite. Every thrust of his hips, every reverent caress of his hands, every sigh or groan is an opportunity to discover a new kind of heaven.
“You were magnificent tonight,” he murmurs, sliding his hand between your bodies to rub your clit. “Even with my fingers playing with your pretty cunt under the table, you looked every inch a queen. My queen.”
He’s never talked to you like this before and it makes your body sing. You arch, rolling your hips with him as the building wave inside you rises impossibly high, as though every orgasm you almost had this evening is starting to arrive all at once. The tension in your hips is equally fantastic and unbearable, a supernova of sensation that may destroy and remake you all at once.
“Filthy girl, I can tell you’re getting close,” he purrs, tilting his hips so he hits the spot that makes you tremble. “You act so prim and proper in public, but it takes so very little to turn you into my perfect little slut when I get you alone.”
You are approaching the peak, the whirling center of the storm building inside you. “Loki—please, I can’t, I’m gonna—”
“That’s it, darling. Soak my cock like a good girl.”
You always come the hardest when he’s inside you and this is no exception. The pressure in your hips is suddenly and spectacularly ablaze with a shimmering euphoria that draws a raw and primal moan deep from inside your chest. You are a fountain of sparks, all the tension and desire of the evening finally reaching its apex. You have yearned for this all night and the resulting blaze is spectacular.
His pace is still slow, but Loki’s eyes are wild and you get the sense that his composure is hanging by a thread. Though his eyes occasionally flutter shut as your cunt convulses around him, his gaze is locked on you in a kind of wonder.
“Do you have any idea how good you feel when you come on my cock?” he rasps.
Even in the throes of utter bliss, you need to hear his voice. “Tell me.”
“I would create entire worlds and walk through the fires of their destruction just to feel you come.”
You shudder out a sigh. “More.”
He picks up his pace just slightly. “I would flatten mountains and raise valleys and reverse the currents.”
“More.”
He’s hitting that aching spot inside you again and the rolling tremors of the aftershocks are starting to coalesce into another building wave. You moan and his hand moves back to your clit, slick fingers pressing and rolling in just the way you need.
His eyes shine, bright with lust as his hips and fingers work diligently to unravel you again. “I would take down the stars and bring the heavens to the earth…”
His words are making you dizzy and his movements are coaxing the pressure inside of you into a cyclone that you know is going to take you down.
“Loki, please.” These are the only words you know because your entire world is him moving inside of you, inevitable as the sunrise, the architect of the heavenly destruction and renewal that is building and building in your hips.
He shifts so his weight is entirely on his elbows, bringing his lips up against your ear so you don’t miss a single word. “I would lay my crown at your feet and forsake my name…just to feel you come on my cock.”
The coil in your hips snaps and unfurls into a starry, sparkling oblivion that has you crying out his name over and over like he’s your ending and beginning, the center of your universe. Your eyes are shut against the onslaught of intense sensation, but you can feel him reaching the blissful height he’d been speaking of. He groans and slurs out a few incoherent oaths before succumbing to you and filling your pulsing cunt with his hot release.
His mouth is on yours and he’s kissing you like he means it as he slows to a halt. You lie together for a long moment, hearts beating wildly against each other.
This felt different than other times. There was an intensity there that had nothing to do with the sex. You don’t know what that means, other than it’s definitely not any kind of feelings for him. It must be something else. You’re certain it’s something else.
“I didn’t realize I’d be called away upon our return.”
You’re so distracted by your thoughts that the sound of his voice startles you slightly.
“Oh, um, yeah, I figured…it seemed unexpected,” you say.
He lifts his head to look at you, green eyes intent. “Trust that there are very few things that could have pulled me away from you in that moment.”
He’s being sincere. It’s not what you expect and that scares you a little, though you can’t quite articulate why. The idea that he would care whether you thought he’d intentionally extended your wait hadn’t even occurred to you. You don’t really know this side of him.
“So, it wasn’t like…making a proclamation designating June National Peanut Butter Month.” You know you’re deflecting, but you don’t know what else to do.
He frowns. “That can’t possibly be a real thing.”
You shrug. “It might be. Lots of governments do stuff like that. Maybe you should consider it.”
His smile is slight, but brief as he stretches and slowly eases out of you. “I will leave that to others.”
There’s a beat of quiet and you suddenly find yourself desperate to fill the silence. “What did they need to talk to you about?”
He looks at you sharply and you wonder if this was the wrong thing to say. Loath as you are to admit it, this conversation has fostered a flicker of warmth between you, a fact you only notice now because of its sudden absence.
“It’s nothing you need to concern yourself with,” he says as he rolls off of you. It’s not unkind, but it’s also not warm, and the discussion is clearly closed.
Part of you mourns the loss of that little spark of closeness, but a larger, louder part is intent on pretending it never existed in the first place.
“Suit yourself.”
You’re annoyed and you roll off the bed and go about your evening routine with a little more clattering and stomping than is strictly necessary. There’s a lump in your throat that you don’t understand and you’re full of feelings you can’t define. You eventually settle on the bed with your back facing him, glaring at the wall like he can see you.
But then he reaches for you in the darkness, his arms winding around your waist, nose nuzzling against the nape of your neck as he pulls you to his chest. And instead of reading him the riot act, you let him hold you and let yourself relax into his embrace, fingers twining around his. You sleep better like this, you tell yourself. That’s the only reason you’re allowing it. It’s nothing to do with him.
You’ve told yourself that every night since your wedding and every night, it gets a little more difficult to believe.
Next chapter coming soon
#loki smut#loki x reader smut#loki x reader#loki x female reader#loki laufeyson smut#loki x female reader smut#loki fanfiction#conquer
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Could you write a (young)Silco/Disabled Reader, who for the most part is able to walk just fine with the help of a brace but on bad days they’ll bring out the cane and on really bad days a wheelchair but is still insistent on trying to do things no matter how much they shouldn’t?
I tried to be as sensitive as I could towards reader's disability. I hope it comes across sincere and that I haven't committed any faux pas. If I have, please let me know in the comments and I will happily revise. Like young Silco in this fic, I will quickly apologize and learn if given the opportunity.
A Voice Like Yours
Masterlist | AO3 link
Rating: Mature
Tags: gn!reader x silco; disabled reader; Silco; Felicia; Connol; Vander; Benzo; fluff; angst; hurt/comfort;
Word count: 3.5k
Beta reader: @juniper-sunny
You would've liked to get to the market sooner, but getting out of bed was particularly hard today. Typically, you're able to handle just fine with only your brace. And when that doesn't work, your cane will usually suffice. But with rough sleep last night and a flare-up this morning, you opt for using your chair today to get to the market. Just until you can get your bearings again.
With your later arrival, you're unable to beat the morning rush, sandwiched between what seems like every citizen of the Undercity. Most give you a wide berth, but others shove past you unceremoniously. You're used to it by now, but your fatigue plasters a permanent scowl on your face as you try to find your usual vendors.
As you make your way through your shopping list, the bag sitting on your lap getting slightly heavier with each new stall you visit, you feel a bit better. (You used to keep your bag slung over the back of your chair, but stopped when some asshole stole it.)
You're on the last item on your list when you get settled in front of one wooden stall and make small talk with the shopkeep. He greets you by name and grabs your usual order, setting it down on the counter before turning his back to fix something. You try to reach for your purchase, but it's just a touch too far. You're about to move your chair closer when a stranger waltzes up and plucks the bag off the counter.
“Hey! That's mine!” you protest, rolling closer to him.
“I know,” he replies, handing it to you. “I was just getting it for you.”
You snatch it and shove it into your canvas bag, still frowning at the tall, slender man with long raven hair.
“I'm perfectly capable of doing it on my own.” You grab your wheels and in one fluid, practiced motion, reposition your chair away from him. You start to leave, but pause, looking over your shoulder. “I don't need your help.”
Out of your periphery, you see him raise both hands in surrender, but from this angle, you can't tell if his expression is sincere or sarcastic. You try to shake it off, ready to go back home and wash your hands of the interaction.
The Undercity is supposed to be the city of self-reliance.
So why does everyone still treat you like a child?
The following day fares better. You bring your cane (just in case) for your shift at the shop, settling into your stool at the cash register. You're reading a book during the slower hours when a customer comes in and sets a stack of papers down onto the counter. Your eyebrows furrow at the flyers and you lift your eyes to see a familiar face.
“If it's alright, I'd like to add these to your bulletin board,” the man from yesterday says, not even looking at you. He leans on the counter, looking out the large windows to the street. “Got a meeting coming up and want to get the word out.”
Finally, he turns to you.
You watch as his face cycles from apathy to confusion to recognition. His eyes dart down to your stool and the surrounding area, seemingly looking for your wheelchair. When he comes up empty, he looks back up to your face, head tilting to the side.
“I didn't need it today,” you preemptively answer. “Not that I owe you an explanation.”
“Right, right, sorry,” he's quick to apologize. “I didn't mean to insinuate—”
“That I'm faking?”
“No! Never!” he says, hands coming up in surrender, again. His shoulders sag forward slightly and he runs his fingers through his hair, an exasperated sigh leaving his lips. “I'm sorry, can we start again?”
He puts his hand out. You eye it warily.
“Hi, I'm Silco.”
Your lips thin, but you take his hand.
“Hi, Silco.” You give him your name.
“I would like to put these up on your bulletin board,” he says, nodding to the corkboard behind you.
You put your hand out.
“Only two,” you instruct. “One here and the one in the back.”
He starts to hand you the flyers, but then pulls back.
“I can put up the one out back,” he offers.
“It's fine,” you say, insisting with a gesture of your hand. “I can do it.”
Silco looks at your hand then up to your face, understanding slowly spreading across his features. He nods, mostly to himself, as he hands you the papers.
“Of course.”
You take one flyer and a thumbtack from the corner of the board, stabbing it in place with a bit more force than necessary.
“You should come,” Silco says from behind you. “We could use a voice like yours in the Children.”
You turn back to him, eyebrows furrowed.
“Just think about it,” he says softly, gathering the pile of papers. With a small, almost apologetic, smile, he leaves.
You lift the remaining flyer, scanning it.
Children of Zaun
Town Hall
Wednesday
4pm
The Last Drop
“Hey, Monte?” you call out. “If it's okay, I think I'm gonna head out a little early.”
Your boss peeks his head out from one of the aisles, his glasses slightly crooked on his nose.
“That's fine,” he reassures you, calling your name. “We're pretty slow today; I can take it from here.”
You take your cane from behind the counter, slinging your backpack over your shoulder.
“Thanks! I'll see you tomorrow!”
You make your way to The Last Drop, having spent a couple days wrestling internally about whether or not to go. You had heard of the Children of Zaun, but not really given them much thought. From what you'd heard, they were a ragtag group of misfits posing as rebels, claiming to want independence from Piltover. You had rolled your eyes in disbelief at the notion. Besides, you have plenty of your own concerns to worry about; it's not as if you have time to take up some righteous cause.
But Silco's words ring in your ear, propelling you forward.
“We could use a voice like yours in the Children.”
What did he mean by that? “Like yours”—what’s that supposed to mean? So they want some sort of token disabled person on their crew to make them look better or something?
But the sincere remorse on his face and the softness of his tone told you otherwise.
Maybe he meant it.
Maybe he does actually want to hear what you might have to say.
So you walk up to The Last Drop, hand clutching your cane, holding it less like a walking stick and more like a blunt force weapon (which it has had to be, on occasion). Taking a deep breath, you pull your shoulders back, and push open the door.
You're by no means early, but there's no way this is the entire gang. You can count on exactly one hand the number of people that showed up. There's Silco, standing with his back to you, what looks to be a couple sharing a table, and then two larger men standing by the bar. You're immediately filled with regret and start to turn back around, until you hear someone call your name.
“You came!” Silco says, more excitement in his voice than you'd expect. “Hey, this is who I told you about.”
Four pairs of eyes turn to you and you feel rooted on the spot.
You shoot Silco a look.
He told them about you? What could he possibly have said?
He gestures you forward, leading you to the couple at the table. You take one of the empty seats and Silco sits in the one next to you. He leans forward, one forearm barred along the wooden surface as he addresses the couple.
“I told you we were missing something,” he starts. “That this—” he gestures to the group, forefinger pointed and moving in a circle, “wasn't enough.”
That same forefinger comes down, tapping incessantly on the table.
“If we're to be the voice of Zaun, we need to make sure that everyone has a spot at the table.”
The woman glances at you before turning back to Silco, nodding slightly as she speaks.
“Okay…” she nods a little more, as if the thought is taking root in her head. “Yeah. That makes sense.” She turns toward you. “My name is Felicia and this is Connol,” she says, leaning her head toward the man next to her.
“Felicia. Connol. Nice to meet you.”
You shake hands with both of them.
“Would you like a drink?”
You pull your lips through your teeth and Felicia is quick to reassure you.
“Don't worry; it's on the house.” She straightens up, calling out to the large man behind the bar. “Vander! Some beer!”
“Get it yourself!” he calls back.
“Fuck you,” she laughs.
“Oy,” the other man says, bringing a tray over. “Watch yer language ‘round the new recruit.”
Felicia laughs.
“They’re an adult, Benzo; they can handle it.”
You look back at her and she offers you a smirk. You take the free mug of beer and Silco raises his up in toast.
“To the Children of Zaun.”
Felicia and Connol mirror the movement.
“The Children of Zaun!”
You lift your glass and say the words, though you don't take them to heart just yet. But as you bring the mug to your lips, you can't help the small smile from creeping onto your face.
Every Wednesday, you leave the shop to go to the bar. And every Wednesday, you become a little more smitten.
With the cause.
With the man that introduced you to it.
The more you get to know Silco, the more you realize your first impression of him wasn't a good representation of the man he is.
Or, perhaps, maybe it was the perfect representation.
A man who only wants to help, eager to uplift those around him. So excited to do so that he steps on a few toes in the process. He's stumbling and clumsy with his help, but he's quick to apologize and quick to learn.
It doesn't take long for you to realize—he’s that way with everyone. It wasn't just you and it wasn't just because you're disabled. He's always on alert for if someone could use a hand, always first to arrive when someone asks for assistance. That's just who he is.
And if this is one of the rebels trying to uplift the Undercity, the Nation of Zaun is in good hands.
Silco is keeping you company at the shop, following you around as you restock some items. He carries a crate of goods while you arrange them on displays, your discerning eye careful to make them look as appealing as possible.
You drop one of the small boxes and Silco is quick to bend down to grab it.
“Silco,” you warn, “What'd I say about helping without being asked?”
“Sorry, right,” he says, straightening up to let you retrieve it. “Force of habit.”
You grin up at him, chuckling. “I'm just fucking with you.”
With some assistance from him, you get out of your wheelchair and resume your place at the cash register. Silco takes the opportunity to sit in your chair, long fingers fiddling with the wheels. You laugh as he tries to maneuver the chair around the front of the shop.
“Have you learned any tricks on this thing?” he asks, trying to lean back and balance it so that his feet lift off the ground.
“It's a wheelchair, not a skateboard, you jackass.”
“That's a ‘no’ then,” he says, smirking. But the smirk is wiped clean off his face when the chair tumbles backwards, sending him crashing to the floor.
You let out a bark of a laugh at that, laughing even harder when he starts to groan.
“Serves you right!” You grab your cane, gingerly getting off the stool to help him back up. “If you broke my chair, I swear to Janna… Do you know how hard these are to get? I had to pay so much coin for it.”
You point your cane at him threateningly, but he wraps his fingers around it and tugs, pulling you forward. A startled squeak at your throat, you fall on top of him, catching yourself just in time so you don't headbutt him.
“Silco—”
“Now we're both down here,” he teases, smirking.
“Wonderful,” you say with a roll of your eyes. “What a masterful plan.”
Something sparks behind Silco's ocean green eyes, something playful, mischievous.
“I'll say it is.”
And with that, he lifts his head, closing the distance between your lips. Your eyebrows lift and your eyes flutter closed, savoring the warmth of his mouth against yours. His hand comes up to tenderly cradle your face and you lean into the kiss, pressing your chest to his so you're flush with him. You don't know how much time has passed, but as you kiss him, you feel as light as a cloud, until—
“Hey!”
You straighten up, face red with blush.
“I don't pay you to swap spit with the customers,” Monte says, but there's no bite to his words. “Get up before someone trips on you.”
You laugh, pressing your forehead to Silco's.
“Here.” You push yourself up, offering him a hand. “Let me help you.”
It’s been a while since you’ve had a friend group like this. Ever since the accident that caused your disability, no one seems to have the patience to deal with your rougher days, as if you’re holding them back.
It’s hard to not internalize that feeling.
But with Silco and the rest of the Children of Zaun, you feel different. Whereas before, it felt like your mere presence was a burden, you feel seen and appreciated. You feel heard.
When you tell Vander that the bathroom stalls are too tiny for your chair, he knocks the dividers down to make room.
When you lament about the small step outside the front door, Benzo throws together a small wooden ramp.
More and more, The Last Drop feels like home, though going to the basement or the upstairs office still eludes you. It’s not that you can’t. It’s more that you’re worried that you’ll have to ask for help to get you back on the ground floor should you get stuck in either place. But, there’s never really been any reason for you to visit either floor, so you’re content to stay in the main bar area, occasionally ducking into the back room when the crowd gets a little too loud.
It’s on one such trip to the storage room that Silco finds you, huddled on the floor, your cane propped up next to you. Your knees are pulled up to your chest and your palms pressed flat against your ears, trying in vain to drown out the sounds of the bar. You had made the mistake of visiting during peak hours and didn’t have the energy to go all the way back home. You thought you could power through it until the customers dwindled, but it became too much. So, you retreated to the back room, holding back tears.
“We have one more!” Silco calls over his shoulder as he opens the door, talking to Vander who tends the bar. “After this, we’ll need to get more.”
He turns over his shoulder to see you on the floor. Immediately, his voice lowers and he crouches down to get eye level, your name a reassuring coo on his throat.
“Hey… are you okay?”
You shake your head, eyes squeezed shut.
“Okay, just… give me a second.”
You hear him pick up a crate of bottles. The door swings open, letting in the raucous noise from outside. You let out a whimper as the door swings closed. After a few tense minutes, the door opens again and you hear footsteps approaching you.
“Hey, I’m back,” Silco coos. There’s shuffling as he moves to sit next to you. “What do you need?”
It’s a sentence you practically trained him to ask. With his tendency to charge forward offering the help he thinks you need, you managed to finally get him to learn to ask you first.
It’s a small gesture, but at this moment, it’s everything.
“I need…” Your breath is shaky, your eyes holding back tears. “I need quiet. And— And it’s too far to walk home.”
Silco shifts, moving to crouch in front of you, hands on either of your shoulders. He squeezes them and you look up to see a tender expression on his face. Not pity or condescension. Concern. Sincere, genuine concern.
“It’s much quieter upstairs in the office,” he offers. “Do you think you can make it?”
Your lips tighten. It’s hard to think with so much noise; you can barely hear your own thoughts. It doesn’t help that you can feel a flare up coming on, pain shooting through your legs.
“I… I don’t know.”
You watch Silco chew on the inside of his mouth, thinking.
“I could… carry you.”
You shoot a look at him, equal parts indignation and humiliation.
“I know, I know. It’s not ideal.” He looks around the storage room as if he’ll find an alternative answer. “But the sooner we get you out of here, the sooner you can feel better.”
You bite down on your bottom lip, wrestling internally. The sting behind your eyes is threatening to push past your defenses. Finally, wordlessly, you nod.
“Okay,” he says, tone firm.
His ocean green eyes dart around your body, trying to figure out how best to pick you up that keeps your dignity intact. But before he can reach a decision, you’re wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him to yourself, holding him in a tight embrace.
“Oh! Hey…” He melts into the hug, bringing both arms around your back, squeezing you gently. “It’s okay.” He rubs your back with one hand, palm warm against your shirt. “It’s okay. We all need help sometimes.”
“I did too much today,” you say into the crook of his neck, tears escaping your eyes. “I should’ve stayed home.”
“Shhhh…” he shushes, shifting his arms as he slowly rises to his feet, bringing you along.
You manage to get to your feet, but your legs feel wobbly and unstable under your weight.
“Here, let me…” Silco bends down and hangs your cane over the crook of his elbow before bringing one arm behind your knees. “On three. One… two… three.”
You lift your legs up and he scoops you up in his arms, straightening to a stand. Instinctively, you wrap both your arms around his neck, nuzzling your face into his shoulder.
“I got you,” he coos. “I’ve got you.” He takes one final look around the room before pushing the door open with his back. “We’ll go behind the bar; no one will even know.”
You nod, tears flowing in earnest now to stain Silco’s shirt.
You press one ear to the crook of his neck, trying to dampen the loud voices of the bar patrons. At that, Silco walks a little faster, making his way up the staircase. In his haste, he drops your cane on the landing.
“Shit! Sorry, I’ll go back for it,” he says, continuing forward.
After opening the door and carefully depositing you onto the plush red cushions of the couch, he darts out the door, returning with your cane in hand. He sets it on the coffee table in front of you before sitting next to you.
“There.” He rubs your hip as you lay on your side. “Is that better?”
You nod, reorienting yourself to rest your head on his lap. Silco settles on the couch, bringing one hand to your head, smoothing down your hair in soft reassuring strokes. His other hand grazes your cheek, wiping away your tears.
It’s finally quiet.
Your legs still ache, but it’s not as bad as it was before. You can feel the rise and fall of Silco’s chest against your back, his breathing a calming rhythm.
“Thank you, Silco,” you whisper.
“Of course,” he whispers back.
After a moment, he shifts, bending down to bring his lips to your temple. You smile at the touch, feeling warmth settle behind your ribs.
“I’m sorry—”
“Don’t,” he cuts you off. “I’ve never heard you apologize before and I don’t want to hear it now.”
The firmness in his voice has you turning your face to look up at him. There’s a resoluteness in his expression, a confidence you typically see reserved for Children of Zaun meetings. He looks off into the distance, as if seeing something that’s not there. A vision. A promise.
“You have nothing to apologize for,” he continues. His chin dips and his ocean green eyes find yours. His eyebrows lift and his lips curl into a soft smile, full of pride and affection. “You’re perfect.”
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