#and overall she isnt one of the characters that are interesting enough to get all that screentime

[decodedparagram]

Star wars choose another director and don't let Dave filoni get involved in everything challenge 2024 go!

[basil-does-arttt]

been thinking about Trish a lot lately, and her connection to Eva

(Big ranty thing with some analysis into her character + my own headcanons about trish below)

She was created to be a carbon copy of Eva, right down to the most unimportant details. So much so that Dante recognized her immediately he didnt even do a double-take, as soon as those glasses were off he saw Eva standing infront of him instead of Trish. (I mean, blonde haired+blue eyed women arent uncommon and its not like Dante has never been into a public space before. Hes probably seen similar women to Eva many times throughout his life, but only Trish was so perfectly like Eva that he couldnt see anything else but his mother in her that first moment they met.)

But thats just physical features. It'd be too easy, too simple for Mundus to just create a look-alike to Eva. And i dont think that alone would've been enough to trick Dante either, Dante isnt an idiot no matter how dumb he acts sometimes. So, how deep into this "recreate Eva" thing did Mundus actually go?

Does Trish experience the same motherly instincts Eva had toward Dante (and Vergil)? Does she feel the need to protect them and cherish them like Eva did? Does she get urges to hold them, kiss and hug them and give them praise as Eva once did in their childhood? If so, does she ignore these feelings, pushing them down untill they're buried so deep within her mind that she's forgotten them entirely, or does she let them be and let them pass on their own, wether she acts on them or not. She's quite sassy with Dante in dmc4 and seems quite aloof in dmc5, so maybe thats how she copes with it instead - acting the total opposite to what Eva ever would.

Going even deeper into that, does Trish have any of Eva's memories? Even just vague snippets or imaginings of Eva's life, considering how well Mundus made Trish then that might not be an impossibility. If so, how much would she have the ability to recall? Could she even recall the fire, maybe? If she can, how would she feel about it. Would she grieve? Feel anger, regret, or nothing at all?

And how would she feel about all of this overall? Being a clone of Eva right down to the gritty details even Dante wouldn't know. Trish is so strongly contrasted to Eva in personality, style and tastes that i'd like to imagine she isnt that much of a fan, put simply. She's her own person, she wants to be her own person and she hates the person she represents. She hates how her existence causes pain to somebody she's wired to care so deeply for - sometimes against her will - and she hates seeing him cry or drink himself to death over that dusty old picture thats been sitting on his desk for decades, knowing that she'll only ever make it worse for him in the end, that his grief extends so far into the core of his being that nothing in existence will ever truly fix it.

She's conflicted.

She's Trish. But is she really? Or is that just who she says she is in an effort to push back and ignore the reality of her existence? Nothing more than a fake, a husk of a person who's time was cut short prematurely then taken advantage of by the very being that killed her in the first place.

She's Trish. Not Eva. She can't be Eva, and she never will be Eva. Nothing will change that. Not a dusty old picture, not an old man's delusions, not some dead demon king who breathed life into her form in the first place.

She's Trish. But who even is Trish? Her entire being has always been about Eva. She doesnt know anything else. So she overcompensates with acting sarcastic and sassy, looking hot and sexy and playing with guns and swords because those are things Eva wouldn't ever do herself. Eva. Again, it all comes back to Eva.

She's Trish. Devil hunter and the most 2000s representation of "hot blonde" one could get. Thats who she is. Or at least, that's who she's trying so desperately to be.

Trish needs more love from the developers, her character is so interesting. I have other analysis' of the other characters too if anybody would be interested in that but for now, ill leave you with my take on the iconic blonde from this wonderful series.<3

[fatphobiabusters]

Brooms by Jasmine Walls and Teo DuVall

[PHOTO ID: The title Brooms is in white all capital letters set against a night scene with a full moon. The cover features two shoulder up illustrations: one is a biracial woman looking away with long black hair and a large earing, one is a Black woman looking forward with a blue collared shirt and a purple biller har, one smaller shoulder up illustration of a Black man with a white collared shirt.

Two full body illustrations on brooms. One of a Chinese woman riding the broom like a surf board wearing a blue handkerchief, white t shirt and blue skirt the other is a Black woman in a yellow dress with one leg up in a stirrup and one arm out with a glow.

And two waist up illustrations of biracial sisters one in pink with glasses and braids and one in purple with her hair up.

Next to the girl in pink and the woman in yellow are the author, illustrator, letter setter and colorist names, in large text: Jasmine Walls, Teo DuVall then in smaller text: Bex Glendining & Ariana Maher. END ID]

Image from Goodreads

Overall rating: 10/10

I can't do a traditional pro cons list because I can't think of a thing I would have wanted different, outside of topics I cant "review" of course (more on this later). However before we get too far I need to lay out the setting so you know what you are getting into! This is a graphic novel about magic realism set in 1930s Mississippi. It follows women (and two girls) of color and their attempt to make cash doing illegal broom racing to make their lives, well easier for one, but also safer.

This isnt a utopia, magic is woven into the racism of the era. No slurs are used but subtle racism is depicted. There is a hierarchy of legality of who can use magic and what kind. It's a underdog story of solidarity and love, it has that "one last job and we retire" energy. While the young girls learn to harness their magic the police patrol, they are supported by a type of found family along side their blood family.

There is a happy ending I will at least spoil that much.

The blending of era and magic is lovingly crafted. For instance one character, Loretta, works as a laundress, she, like a lot of women in the time and place struggle with money and finds work where she can. Magic here isn't like the cheat code for easy living, she cant just magic the cloths clean and mended. It's a muscle to train and partner with not a deus ex eject button for every little thing. Each character reveals so much yet so little of themselves to us and there is an epiloge of sorts that delights the mind to want more of these characters. So I guess my point is, yes magic but also hardships and I've never seen it done like this before.

So all that said let me pull back on all the other things about this story and answer the question...

Hows the fat rep?: The characters come in many sizes, Loretta seems to be the biggest of her friend group. Her weight is never mentioned, no jokes about how a fat person could ride a broom! She's got a loving husband (no jokes about the size difference!) Billie Mae is the second biggest of the main cast perhaps more musclar than fat but is distinct imo in body shape and build and its my review so...she's different from Loretta, Lor is femme leaning and Billie is butch and here too there are no jokes it's simply a part of her design, shes the only woman on the team to wear pants. There are background and unnamed fat characters! You'd be suprised how hard that is to find.

This is very much a situation where weight is not brought up, it exists as a thing and thats it. And I appreciate that because fat peoples lives shouldn't be all about our weight, we deserve to exist with hobbies and interests and jobs.

Additionally: You might have seen that trend where people list off rep of a book and don't even mention the plot? Well I hope my introduction was enough to cover story and such because this comic has: visible and invisible disability rep, sapphics, a trans main character, and remember how I gushed about unnamed characters? There's also physical disabilities. The attention to detail while designing otherwise nameless characters is appreciated.

My limits as a reviewer:

I can't say if there good enough representation for Black women btw. For me this was obvious but I'm adding it just in case.

A main character is Deaf and due to the limitations of the medium the artist and writer had to imply signs. Consideration for the eye line of this character is given, she will bump and nudge people to turn towards her so she can read lips. I cannot say if this is a good compromise or not.

The issue of cultural appropriation could be had. It is mentioned that the author worked with the language experts from the Mississippi Band of Choctaw Indians, and in story residential schools are mentioned and briefly depicted. Was this respectful or enough research I cannot say.

You mighy find additional concern with the trans rep, it is mentioned that an outside source was consulted to bring authenticity. Related, a person was consulted about the Cantonese depicted. Was this enough I cannot say.

Individuals will each have their own feelings about own voices vs researched stories. There's no one perfect answer but I can only provide the info that's in the book to help you make informed decisions.

On Goodreads

[yifftwiceplz]

big d striders big blowup barbeque

what: food fireworks beer and socializing byow where: my backyard when: all day july 4th but i dont get up til 10am who: you why: free food and explosions

im bad at writing these but its what it says on the tin im gonna grill and blow things up if youre interested let me know

you dont have to bring anything but youre welcome to

the pool and hot tub are open for use but like dont be a fucking dickhead in there use your brain dont just dump trash or food or drinks in there

i have to deal with the hoa so try not to get into any fights or screaming matches i will straight up send you home dont care

ooc info: totally assumed interaction, ask dave IC for an invite if you dont get one / your character isnt a +1

their backyard is pretty big / private with a pool, patio, fire pit, etc. there will be your average bbq options + chips and snacks, as well as ice coolers filled with soda and drinkies therell be music outside and some kind of TV / gaming inside

theres only a couple of guest rooms so around 11pm karkats gonna start glaring at everyone menacingly

dave: grilling with a beer in one hand and a joint hanging off his lips. tank top, basketball shorts, sandals. he's overall in good spirits / not too shy since it's home turf. if you irritate him he will get you with the tongs

karkat: doing food prep and making sides inside, making lemonade and tea, etc. hes as sociable as karkat gets

dirk: helping set up fireworks, otherwise he's attached to biojohn at the hip, but still sociable enough

bstri: in charge of fireworks / gonna be the one lighting them off. cigarette in his mouth the entire time he's working on them. waves off criticism. doesn't go out of his way to socialize, but doesn't avoid anyone either. mostly talks to dave and rose

rose: either floating around tiredly, or resting in a particularly comfy outside chair. pretty much all pillows available are forfeit to her. as it goes on she moves to the couch and then to a guest room very sociable but gets tired easy it's not uncommon to see her hanging off roxy/dirk/dave/kanaya for support as she gets tired out

kanaya: if you're a troll you get the autism interest stare like "talk to me. no i wont initiate" shes very awkward and shy but shes very funny unintentionally

roxy: VERY boisterous and social. she will say hi. she will talk to you she will ask you a billion questions until you're a little overwhelmed

jake: jake. he will get plastered and make an idiot of himself (affectionate)

jane: jane. glaring holes through sefoni, socializes mainly with jake and dirk and roxy

john: absent

jade: mostly socializing with dave karkat and jake, HIGHLY embarrassed by jake's antics. probably also glaring holes into sefoni

terezi: absent

ult dirk: wouldn't you like to know weather boy.

uhhhh idk if i need a #tag for it or anything we'll see how everyone feels closer to time

[thealmightyemprex]

Well,we have more movies after this but actually we have already reached a sort of end here,as this block wraps up the big 3 monsters (Dracula,Frankenstein and Wolf Man ) and we end the 40's here

21.House of Frankenstein(1944)

So this is the big crossover movie,all three big monsters are together at last:Dracula ,Wolf Man and Frankensteins Monster....And they never fucking interact .Draculas dies halfway through ,and Wolfman dies right before the monster wakes up......So bit of a disappointment and the movies structure is a mess .Boris Karloff is back,this time as a mad scientist ,and he gives a good performance but it is kind of hilarious how much he screws over the monsters simply cause he is taking too much time to get his experiments done and he is kind of an asshole .Theres an interesting enough love triangle between J Carol Naish as the hunchbacked assistant in love with a Romani woman (Clearly trying to evoke Hunchback of Notre Dame ),who is in love with Larry Talbot ,Talbots story is nice and tragic ,with Lon Channey Jr being great as always as Talbot .As for the other two monsters they have good actors ,John Carridine fits a more book accurate Dracula ,and Glenn Strange with his huge build and craggy face is an imposing monster,but they are barely in the movie sadly .Will say I like the meta symbolism of the ending of the monster carrying Karoff only for the two to sink in quicksand together ,united forever .I dunno its a very flawed movie but its got its moments

22.The Mummys Curse (1944)

...Zzzzzzzz-*gasp*.....Oh yeah,....This was meh ....Just a bog standard Mummy movie......Yeah while I have fondness for the other monsters and am sad to see them go.....I am more then happy I am almost done with the Mummy movies ,at least the next ones a comedy

23.House of Dracula (1945)

The last of the war time Monster movies,and honestly the last serious film of the main line Monster films ,till Creature of the Black Lagoon in the 50's ....And its not good.It has the same problems as House of Frankenstein but more so :The monster dont really interact ,stories a mess ,but added to that ......The title character and main villain dies half way through ,to make room for a diffrent villain,Frankensteins Monster might as well not be there and its just a bit of a whimper.Will say Carridine is a good Dracula ,I just wish he had a good movie to go with his Drac ,I really liked the Nurse character Nina ,and I was really happy to see Larry Talbot get a happy ending for once

24.She Wolf of London(1946)

.....Why is this in this DVD set ? Cause ummm.....Its not a monster movie ,its more like Gaslight or like something from Val Lewton like the Leopard Man .....Except it isnt good .As much as I love June Lockhart she just isnt well directed here ,and I kind of knew really early on who the villain was .Will say there is a saving grace to the movie :Sara Haden as Aunt Martha is REALLY excellent .I think my overall takeaway isdissappointment,this is not a lady werewolf movie nor a particularly good thriller ,but Haden keeps me from hating it .Also Horace from 101 Dalmations plays a cop,that was fun

25.Abbot and Costello Meet Frankenstein (1948)

So the monsters are brought back after a hiatus for one last ride to meet Universals other big money makers at the time,the comedy team of Bud Abbot and Lous Costello.....And my feelings are complicated ,not on the film,the film is great,but on its legacy.First off the idea of the crossover was brillaint ,as humor is fairly common in the Monster films and the main conciet is REALLY funny,cause Costello is REALLY funny when he is scared ,and who better to scare him then Dracula and the Frankenstein Monster .I also like that within the film the monsters are played seriously ,with the humor coming from the childlike fear of Lou and Buds grumpyness with Lou for thinking monsters are running around .The Monsters are great ,Lon Chaney Jr as Larry Talbot being are token heroic monster ,and being a good foil to Bud and Lou ,Glenn Strange actually gets stuff to do as the Monster (And even a few lines ) with a wonderful chase scene near the end being a highlight ,and Bela Lugosi returns to his most iconic role as Dracula and is a great charming yet conniving villain .The gags are funny ,with some great one liners and some amazing comedic set pieces .I also think it is both a great horror film for kids and is a go to film for me to throw on around Halloween .So yeah I love the movie and part of me feels it is a fun last hurrah for the monsters ......But seeing it in this marathon context it also felt bitter sweet ,they quit being taken seriously and were solidified as figures of fun.....but fun is not bad ,its just a diffrent way of viewing them .Overall I love this movie and it is one of my faves of the lot

Rankings so far

25.The Mummys Tomb

24.Werewolf of London

23.Invisble Agent

22.She Wolf of London

21.Mummys Hand

20.Mummys Curse

19.Son of Dracula

18.House of Dracula

17.Invisible Woman

16.Ghost of Frankenstein

15.House of Frankenstein

14.Mummy

13:Mummys Ghost

12.The Invisible Mans Revenge

11.Dracula's Daughter

10.Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman

9.Dracula

8.Invisible Man Returns

7.Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein

6.Invisble Man

5..Son of Frankenstein

4.Phantom of the Opera

3.Wolf Man

2.Frankenstein

1.Bride of Frankenstein

To be....Concluded

@ariel-seagull-wings @the-blue-fairie @countesspetofi @themousefromfantasyland @piterelizabethdevries @theancientvaleofsoulmaking @princesssarisa @amalthea9 @barbossas-wench

[cadaverousconsumer]

helloooo here are my beta kid headcanons! @icarusshomestuckfan do u remember that one convoersation we had about how i had no headcanons? well i do now!!!!

also im only doing the beta kids rn cause i dont wanna spoil anything for @giggleshitter0

ok chat starting with my main dude

Dave Strider hc!! dave is definitely, at the start at least, very thin but relatively lanky bc of general malnourishment from bro. however i like 2 think that he would become healthier throughout the comic and eventually become a healthy weight for his height. dave i think, if he went 2 school i think people would like him and think he was cool and wanna hang out buttt i think that he wowuld only have a couple good friends like the other beta kids buttt like his irl friends. i think dave definetly learned many domestic chores at a very young age. however i think bro would care about how dave looks, like his style and whatnot, but it would be strictly mandated by bro, with lil room for dave to express himself differently from bro. i think that dave is biracial bc i think roxy is black n dirk is pale asf in a white way.

kk now for our unoffical main character the nicest sigmaest guy john!

John Egbert hc: just clariying i think june egbert iis totally cool and probably canon buttt i personally never rly thought about it b4 getting into the fandom so i have no headcanons for her so here r my headcanons for john. john definitely is on the chubbier smaller side imo. his dad does bake a lot! i think john had a pretty good upbringing and was pretty happy with his bad movies and prank obssession. at school he probably had a couple nerdy friends and tehy were all very close! i dont think he would play dnd buttt if he did i bet thats where he would meet his friends, stranger things style. john is a classic nerd and people like him bc hes so nice and very considerate. john likes basketball n has fun playing it but isnt very good. i think john is half brazilian bc i think jake is brazilian but alpha kids are for another day haha. john has definetly broken his glasses a few times tripping over things. i think hes a bit clumbsy lol.

now onto our goth queennnn rose

Rose Lalonde hc: rose definitely had a rough childhood 2 but i think her mom took more care of her then bro did even if it was only 2 play the role of motherhood for her passive aggressive tendencies. she definitely stopped doing anything (other than vacuuming lol) once rose was old enough to do it herself. i think roses hair is bleached and straightened to oblivion and when she gets older shes defintely gonna wish she hadnt done it so much when she was younger. i think at school many people would have wanted to be her friend but she prefered more solitude, for wizard fanfics and eldritch god study. i think rose is shorter and curvier, (i def like the idea of her being shorter than kan) and a bit darker than dave. she started her intensive makeup routine in the hopes of attracting her mothers attention negatively, but with no luck. however she kept up with it because she found she liked the repetitivness of putting it on each morning, as well as the fact that it fit her overall aesthetic.

now for everyones fav doggie girl, jade!

Jade Harley hc: i love jade i think she is sooo cute. jade had an interesting childhood, being raised by a god level dog. i dont think it was necessarily bad just... very different from the other kids. i imagine she was left unattended a lot, but bec would always be aware of when to teleport in 2 save her. her hair is very long and has never really been cut officially due 2 living in the woods. jade is completely homeschooled and has nevre left the island. i think jade is rather petite and pretty thin overall... i imagine dogs probably arent the best at nutrition for humans haha. even tho jade doesnt know any kids her age in person i think she probably had many online friends and spent a lot of time online, playing games, watching videos, and just messing around. i think she learned bass from a youtube video. jade is also half brazilian cause jake

well those r my shitty headcanons

[mistlestripe]

read wings of fire book #10 (spoilers)

so mad. idk how controversial that this is but this book was terrible and probably the worst of the SERIES so far lmao. everyone was so bad but especially the moon/qibli/winter trio. they were all terrible in this book and i feel so bad for winter. I loved moon in the first book and she was like one of my top 2 second arc protag faves but she's dropped down to the bottom of the group because of how obnoxious she acts in this book...qibli too kind of sucks but like he doesnt do anything annoying (or when he does it makes sense cause he values moon over winter.) he just never gets to obtain a win that isnt weak and overall lacks much weight behind it. everything he does moves on very quickly and it feels like the book just "waits a few seconds before showing what he does to artificially cause suspense". like I would have appreciated him denying animus magic more if he didnt react to the offer the same way he reacted to cobra tricking him (acting hopeful to the prospect only to reveal hes gonna say no at the last second as though that WASNT the obviously correct answer)

and like i probably do have some bias because winter is definitely higher than qibli for me in terms of characters but like I dont even have an issue with the fact that moon chose qibli over him, but its just the fact that the narrative needs to go out of its way to characterize winter as extremely unreliable and untrustworthy JUST to make qibli seem better. Winter is rash and irrational so I get it to a CERTAIN extent but the book acts like he is incappable of making correct decisions to the point his own friends don't trust him enough to tell him what happened to darkstalker (which i know they were like "we trust you to be there for us. not to do the right thing." WHICH IS BS AND RUDE ASF BRAH HIS BOOK WAS LITERALLY ABOUT HIM BECOMING OPEN MINDED LMFAO i feel like he'd be pissed but like with how much he hates magic he'd probably eventually comprehend it as deserved. Maybe if they said something like "its for the best you dont know" then THAT would make sense because they want peacemaker to have his own chance at life but like their reasoning is so dumb and it just makes me feel bad for winter and think that he deserves better friends who actually value him and the things he cares about. I wouldnt mind if moon chose qibli of her own volition because i DO like the subversion of winter seeming more like a love interest in the beginning (only for qibli to become the "true" love interest for her by the end) BUT i cant even trust moons agency and it feels entirely circumstansial because of how much the book went out of its way to make winter unlikable and the obvious "worse option" than qibli who acts perfect to her the entire book comparatively. it just feels like they did not give winter a chance at ALL and it even goes on to act like he NEVER had a chance with moon being like "i want someone nice to me who make me laugh." Their relationship in general is so bland and neither of their personalities are utilized to make a fun dynamic so it just feels like theyre both sanitized when theyre togehter. I think moon x qibli has a lot of potential to be interesting and cool and in concept/without context i dont mind the ship but they just dont utilize any of it at all in the book and it feels extremely unearned and obvious by the end.

[typekiku]

thoughts on TYPE MOON stuff

well these are my the type moon stuff i have read or watched or whatever so far. this is my opinion only so its inherently correct argue with the wall or touch grass as the youth say SO here it goes drum roll

FATE EXTRA

boring as shit. no joke im sorry its just booty cheeks but of the not sexy kind. its beyond mid its so mid i cant even act like i enjoyed it. it has an interesting concept and world sure but everything else is doo doo butter.

only good part is nero being hot asf and ig whatever servant there is because i only used nero (lmao i aint playing it all over again) she was funny at times

see shes hilarious at times... im sure CCC will change my mind... right? it has sakura what am i saying its PEAK

also fuck them for including arcueid in this crap

GARDEN OF SINNERS

i honestly dont have much to say about this one it never really clicked with me nor did i ever feel anything about it... BESIDES TOUKO

TOUKO IS SO HOT OMG

clears throat

that aside yea i genuinely dont have any opinion on this series of movies good or bad besides movies 3 and 5 which were my favorites

maybe i need to rewatch em one day and really try to get into it

FATE STRANGE FAKE

my favorite spin off in the whole fate franchise. it has some of my absolute favorite characters and GIL like what else would one even want in life amirite

some of my favorites are:

Richard: the absolute goat and one of my fav servants ever

Enkidu: i want a spinoff of gil and enkidu... is that so hard to ask??

Flat: my son

Jack: my uhhh child ig

alcides: the closest we will get to archer herc but just pure cool regardless

hansa: cyborg priest. nothing gets cooler then that

and many more im already too ti- FILIA - red to mention

i've only read up to volume 7 so i gotta get to reading the rest soon

its just pure chaos and is fun while doing so despite being slow as shit

FATE GRAND ORDER

ok this is the most complicated series here in a way since its so incredibly mixed.

there are some of the highest peaks in fate and then some of the lowest lows so lets see

Highest peaks:

babylonia

Camelot

lb5 (YES olympus and atlantis im tired of acting like olympus isnt peak NO heian kyo its mid)

LB6

the rest of the lostbelts are good but not that good

goetia is an incredible villain

lowest lows:

first five singularities

solomon im sorry the stuff with goetia was peak but the rest was average

gameplay

gacha

serious lack of male summer servants like cmon i wanna see them abs

overall fgo is alright but some parts of it is straight up incredible HOWEVER all of it is seriously held back by being a gacha mobile game and has to work around that limitation

also it has barghest whom i absolutely adore

also fuck fgo for forgetting medea...

WITCH ON THE HOLY NIGHT

now this is peak. the most gorgeous tm work by far i have to say its simply an incredible read all around. even tsukire did not look or work or sound as good as mahoyo did even tho it came out almost ten(?) years after

on the story front i loved it too with a special shoutout to soujuuro being one of my favorite characters in TM (i say this often not my fault type moon keeps releasing bangers)

however mahoyo has two issues for me:

the story is clearly incomplete: i dont mean its just nonsense or whatever but when nasu said its the first of a trilogy you can just feel that in the story with alot of things being left in the air. this wouldnt be an issue really if mahoyo 2 wasnt basically dead....

i didnt vibe with the slice of life scenes as much as i usually do in nasu works: this isnt a flaw in the story more so i just didnt like em idk how else to word that

mahoyo is a great read however and i highly highly recommend you read it or else

it also has touko enough said

TSUKIHIME (original version)

Greatest of all time. Zenith of the medium. Hallmark of media. Gold standard of storytelling. Apogee of creativity. Vertex of invention. Crest of ingenuity. Acme of imagination. Pinnacle of innovation. Epic of epics. Legend among legends. Peak fiction

ok fr tho its actually incredible and you should read it right the fuck now

all of the characters are simply chefs kiss. while the visual novel is incredibly dated and the art is even worse you have to understand this is nasu and takeuchis first ever visual novel made on a barely existing budget.

boy do they make up for that.

the vn is split into two with a near side and far side.

while the near side is really good with arcueid and ciels route (ignore how ciel was actually really fucked over even in her own route its laughable and my girl deserved better) the far side is so much more better and really is where the soul of tsukihime and shiki the main character lies

i cba to review it properly besides saying PLEASE READ IT RN or ill cry and you dont wanna see that do you....

heres my ranking of the routes btw best to worse:

hisui

kohaku

akiha

arcueid

ciel

shoutout to satsuki you finally are gonna get the route you deserved

KAGETSU TOHYA

um it has some cool lore and some really good short stories and... yea thats about it...

dont have much else to add...

play it with a guide because the structure of the game is abysmal

FATE STAY NIGHT

what is there to be said about such a masterpiece? what else could be written about fsn that hasnt been written before? i am but an ant in the shadow of the giant that is FSN only seeking some crumbs to feed and live off of. idk what that means but it sounds cool.

FSN is simply tms best work all around. while i prefer tsuki over it and find the tsuki side of TM more interesting FSN overall is much stronger on most fronts but especially its main characters

Shirou emiya is simply the goat nothing else to be said tbh

heres my ranking of the routes:

issei route

heavens feel

ubw

fate

FATE ROUTE MUST BE REANIMATED RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SABER DESERVES TO HAVE A PROPER ADAPTATION RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

we need more medea and kuzuki holy shit are they cute

FATE HOLLOW ATARAXIA

thank you type moon for making a good kagetsu tohya. its actually impressive just how much better this is then KT like seriously what the fuck did they take to drop this banger of a vn

KT had such shit comedy i didnt even giggle throughout it but THIS

THIS is a emotional rollercoaster of a whole different kind.

introducing the third (arc and medea are first and second) love of my life Bazett and angra we go through an incredible main story intermingled with hilarious and wholesome slice of life scenes that never overstay their welcome

this vn completely changed my opinion on some characters especially illya who went from someone i was kinda 50/50 on to adoring her overall

ALSO MEDEA SCENES YES I WON MOTHERFUCKERS I WO- huh? whats that? fgo basically replaced her with medea lily?

one hour of sobbing later

if you have read fsn and not FHA then i must ask you.. wtf is wrong with you psycho? you like missing out on good things? that wouldnt be me is all im saying

read it.

(in case you're wondering yes there is someone i deliberately didnt mention because my opinion on them is too complicated)

TSUKIHIME REMAKE

im not a fan of remaking classics on the level of tsuki. with all its flaws i still find the original to be good enough to not need a remake...

UNTIL I READ THE REMAKE

this is how you do it folks. the story was elevated on nearly every level and if it was the complete story id say its the best ever in existence ever forever fr. its just that good.

there are three things i really want to point out:

while maybe goin overboard i really liked the buffs all the characters received and in general the whole worldbuilding is so much better now with idea bloods and principles and vampire hierarchies and arcueid inflation scenes (heh) its just epic

ciel got a so much better route that actually feels like a ciel route and not just arcueid route 2 electric bugaloo (and getting fucking cucked)

noel is peak

this is peak type moon and when red garden comes out it will be even BETTER especially with satsuki route because satsuki deserves it

there are some other short stories i havent mentioned like garden of avalon, notes, MAGNITUNING (look it up you wont regret it) its all great and worth the time of reading

eventually i wanna play CCC and read some other stuff like maybe prillya DDD, fgo jp like lb7 traum and whatnot

i just wrote this for fun so dont really take anything i say seriously except for the teeny little part where im inherently correct.

uh if you are reading like or share or whatever tf it was idk

ciao

[zeltalia]

Can you introduce them all to us?

Of course i can! Im working on a bugger post for it but basically

Lanayru is called Norah. Shes a Zora and pretty tall. She behaves all ladylike and proper and, as Eldin would say, “got a stick up her ass”. She takes her position very seriously even if she just prefers to watch from the sidelines what her King does. No one actually knows if shes just cocky or if shes trying to hide a low self esteem. Shes good friends ds with Eldin though, as different as they are.

Eldin is called Nurak. Hes a lively Goron who is always ready to have fun. He’s physically incapable of holding a grudge which isnt great, to say the least. He has an incredibly strong moral compass and doesnt like that Lanayru is so passive in her role. Hes very enthusiastic about geology too and loves to chill in the mines. When Death mountain isnt erupting (no lava) he can often be seen running through hot springs like a child.

Gerudos name is Searali. She lives outside of Gerudo town, at Kara Kara Bazaar, but she somehow still manages to keep up to date with everything happening inside the Town. She has a habit of unintentionally sneaking up on people and scaring them, which often leads to someone getting punched. She helped Riju with her duties as Chief when she was forced into to tbe position due to her mothers death. Overall takes her job very seriously and is always one of the loudest voices during meetings with Riju or the other Regions. Best friends with Lanayru

Hebras name is Tovin. He is a Rito who, funnily enough, is scared of heights. Well, funny for everyone else. He hates it. He doesnt take his job as Region seriously at all, and it shows. Hes absent for a little of meetings, when he is present hes constantly distracted or just plainly not listening. He is very invested of the wellbeing of the Rito tribe though. Lanayru is so fed up with him.

Central Hyrule has the name Selena. Shes Hylian and more interested in herbs and plants than she is in her duties. She still somehow manages to get her stuff done on time though, Hylia knows why. She lives un the castle with the royal family of Hyrule but is rarely seen there.

Farons name is Akas. He has only “recently” appeared. No one knows where the Hylian came from, no one knows if he is connected to the legendary Zonai or not. He seems to have a lot of knowledge about them anyways…Hes an introverted guy but does have a lot of fun when with specific people, even if he is very exhausted after.

Mkre characters may be added in the future! Like Necluda, Akkala or Hyrule forest.

Hope this post helps a bit!

[chocottang]

heyyys hope this isnt an awkward ask but, since you like cami a very normal amount i presume, i thought i'd ask... do you maybe understand or have any interpretations or headcanons about cami and her shadow and how they manage to coexist in the same body together?

(e.g.: is cami always her shadow? do you think she see it and interact with it like fred? how come she has more control over it than other characters but still not enough? etc.)

overall just your personal thoughts about it just because i think that was never really explained in the show and i would love to see what someone who has such a complex and interesting understanding of her backstory thinks about it ! hope this isnt weird to ask hnhnfnfng

hey! not weird or awkward at all, i love getting asks! and thanks for the nice comments u///u

i put a read more just in case it's too long

like you said, cami's shadow wasn't explored a lot in the show, we only got two frames to be exact.

i'm going to call her shadow tat

i already talked about the first frame in the analysis: i think tat came out as a result of cami's realization that she's not alone, that eak and t-trap have been with her all along. tat was probably triggered by the uncommon influx of overwhelming emotions. her purporse seems to be to keep the body going as normal, since the only thing that we see of cami after this is a frame where she looks the same. we don't know if it's cami or tat in z3r0 but she's also acting the same.

about the second frame, it's interesting in the context of the song, because tat seems to be reaching for something while the lyrics talk about finding a way out. after the song, tat takes over the body, so maybe it was alluding to the way out of the shadow world. but, the frame also goes together with this one in an interesting way.

this frame is actually supposed to go with the one of ttrap reaching for cami when they were kids, cami only reaching out now. but, it could go with both of them. cami is both reaching towards ttrap and tat. meaning, she wasn't taken over by her, but rather, she let tat take control. it may be alluding to cami letting her most repressed emotions take over again, accepting them. nevertheless, we know shadows are sentient beings, not just metaphors, so this leads me to think that:

1. even though cami was met with a pretty strong realization after eavesdropping eak and ttrap, she didn't want to actively change anything about her life. at least not yet.

2. cami and tat have at least met before for cami to willingly give her control. besides, they don't look even mildly surprised about what's happening. only on the second frame does tat look different and it doesnt strike me as surprised, but rather like she's just reaching hard.

which brings me to this question: how does cami have powers? a little out of nowhere, but bare with me.

cami and owynn have powers of some sort that are connected to the shadow world, they can make someone's shadow come out and cami can make someone into a mindless zombie.

we've seen that shadows have some sort of power. gold could turn people into mindless zombies (or maybe he was just retransmitting cami's power?), shadow fox had some sort of fire (or maybe he was the fire?) and fred was able to...explode...and make a group of people forget the last year of their lives.

in z3r0, we learn that when humans and shadows fuse, they gain powers that can debilitate shadows.

this makes me think that cami and owynn's powers are nothing more than their shadow's powers. i don't think its a fusion, since those powers seem to be specifically for debilitating shadows, the opposite of what owynn and cami do. in the case of cami, her powers may be just her shadow coming out, since we dont see her eyes very often. but im very sure that the one time owynn used his powers on that one piano, it was himself. so, there exists a way for a human to borrow their shadow's power. meaning, they have to have a relationahip with them in some way. do they make a deal? do they force them? i dont know. but based on the little we see of tat, it seems that at least her and cami are in good terms.

i don't think it's in the level of fred and freddy though, as i believe most shadows are confined to the shadow world unless they take over the human's body. fred is an exception, a very special boy. but i don't think it's necessary to have a ghost form in order to form a bond with a human. the villains seem to know quite a bit about the shadow world, so maybe they found a way to access it on command so they can regularly talk to their shadow and make sure they access its powers.

so, i think cami and tat are in good terms, and cami visits her regularly in the shadow world. whether it be for accessing her power or to talk about what tat has done outside with the power. since the powers are used to serve the villains, tat has to know about the plan and is on board with everything, and since cami has always been aware of what's happened regarding the plan, it means tat is always telling her what she's done (if she's the one using the powers). they really trust each other and are on the same page. at some point, they had an agreement that when cami has to deal with strong emotions, tat will go out. this may be so cami can escape the situation so she doesn't have to deal with her feelings, while tat keeps normalcy. also, so they can be a productive peon for owynn regardless of the situation. so, they have open communication and willingly give control of the body over to the other one, the frequency of this depending on if tat is responsible for all magic acts or if she only goes out on dire ocassions.

the fact that she has more control over her shadow than most characters may be because she simply has more of a relationship with her. or, perhaps the control she attempts to have over her own feelings manifests in a docile shadow, easily controlled. I don't think tat has the same cold personality as cami, but rather she pretends to. i think, in reality, she houses cami's deepest and most repressed feelings, and tat pretends that she doesnt have them so cami won't get mad at her. she does it and agrees on everything cami wants to do so she continues visiting her. even shadows can get lonely, especially in the black endless nothing of the shadow world.

uhh i think that's all i have. its mostly dumb theorizing. thanks for the ask!!! it was really fun to think about. i do like cami a very normal amount <3

[iratusmus]

Hii, I read that freakishly looong (but interesting) take on Fiona

Personally, I think the major problem for her in the comics was that she wasnt really of major importance to the writers. I think the writers thought of her as interesting at first then got bored of her and she was lost to the wind.

I think thats where the problem started.

Secondly, I think the freedom fighters were also at fault. I think they forgot that not everyone has the mental capacity to be a hero. Not exactly good person but I think they expected too much of Fiona. Im not saying this in a degrading way tho. I mean, she went through a lot and they expected her to be healed already, they expected her to suddenly see them as heroes and want to be good. They forgot that not everyone has that inclination. They expected too much and I think that also got her overwhelmed.

Im not sure if this makes sense but yeah this is my take on it.

its pretty clear that bollers and penders didnt have much investment in her character at all, but also that that point she was really just a tangentially relevant side character. like i said in my post, frankly before ian gave her a corruption arc she didnt really have much to offer in the first place. you cant really fault the writers all that much because she wasnt really meant to be of major importance. when ian took the helm as main writer he clearly thought she had potential as a character and utilized that through the corruption arc. she wasnt "lost to the wind", she just became a villain and, as such, didnt need to be on the main screen all the time. archie sonic has a lot of villains and it would be honestly a bit annoying if we spent all of our time with just a handful of them - theyre great characters and should be used accordingly! yeah she took a bit of a backseat in the "scourge+fiona+ss go to mobius and get whacked for it" arc, but like. come on they were clearly setting something up here

she comes back in journey to the east and is pulling together her own gang there, and then comes back in full swing in scourge lockdown, in which they were. also. clearly setting something up

the plan according to ian is i believe that scourge & fiona were gonna have an epic breakup and she'd take the destructix in the divorce, which tracks plenty enough with the setup that was being put in place.

also, honestly im gonna have to partially disagree with you on the second point. its a complicated situation and i think youre simplifying it a bit too much. fiona willingly chose to "become a hero" - its not like they made her. she literally couldve left at any point in time to just be a normal civilian (which is... literally what mina did. nobody had an issue with it, even though mina's superspeed wouldve been a massive aid in battle. she wasnt equipped to be a hero in that way because, like you said, that kind of life really isnt for everybody).

also, the freedom fighters frankly cant be everybody's personal therapist - theyve all got so much baggage themselves and they cant even address that because theyre all in the middle of a war 😭 i dont think its that they expected too much of her - id say its much more in the direction of that they didnt even really consider what she went through or how it wouldve affected her in the first place. its less that she got overwhelmed and more that she was functionally an outsider who had no support system and no friends to stick up for her or try to really make her feel like she was one of the team - not out of malice or anything, but just because nobody really ever thought about it in the first place.

overall its just a really messy situation and while fiona made the bad choices that she did of her own volition, there were real reasons behind why she made those decisions in the first place

[red-velvet-0w0]

Okokok

This coupon is redeemable at any time for an oc rant, a worldbuilding rant, or both! Or anything else relevant to your stories!

OKAY!

so basicaly:

the story takes place in the town of Watchton Massechusets, which is just an ordinary town with nothing strange or suspisious going on and no cults whatsoever.

Suddenly, one day, the world gets stuck in a time loop with 5 teenagers being the only ones (or at least the only ones at first) who can remember anything from the previous iterations of the time loop, and have to work together to try and figure out why they are in a time loop and how to get out of it

now to be more specific, the rules of the time loop make it so that even those 5 can barely remember anything from previous loops, only really able to remember overall information about their situation, such as the fact that they are in a time loop, how each of their abilities work, and what their relationship is to other people, but cannot remember specifics of what happened previous loops. however, they each also have a special ability allowing them to remember a bit more of what happened before called a Memorabilia

the characters are:

(in order)

Amelia Augur: lesbian genderfluid cottagecore artist with an interest in the supernatural and a pet raven named Ray who can remember everything from every loop but is a bird and therefore can only do so much to help

Jane Hare: transfem lesbian writer trapped in an abusive relationship with the god of mirrors (its complicated) who wakes up every morning with a limerick explaining what happened the previous day in cryptic and poetic wording

Ida Vidya: aromantic pansexual reporter who needs to know everything to the point of having a death wish, who has a special disposable camera which keeps 10 pictures she takes in a day into the next loop

Jack Edmund-Kang: bisexual jock son of the mayor with a dead mom, a dad he wishes was dead, and serious self esteem issues, whos body doesnt get reset between days, meaning he can grow muscle and learn muscle memory, but also keeps all the scars hes ever gotten. he can also remember all the blood hes ever seen in any loop

Blake Payne: gay emo transmasc/enby drummer with mommy issues, a knife, and the ability to remember things based off of sound.

As they start investigating though, they soon realize that there are other forces they need to watch out for, just about all of whom want to kill them

Special Agent Booker, CIA: a secret agent sent every morning by the US government with all of the resources and manpower she could ever need to figure out why everything is weird, though her investigations are always cut short by the fact that none of it carries over between days, though she still manages to make for an obstacle when she and the kids are trying to investigate the same thing

Mayor Kang: Jacks father and the mayor of the town, who is secretly a centuries old cult leader with a mission to guard a magic artifact called the Pentagramic Pocketwatch, that he was hoping to use to revive his dead wife, only for it to to get stolen, and him to assume it was stolen by his son, directing the cult to try and hunt down and kill them to try and get it back

The Day: Minor god of Days. dies every night and is born every morning. Was actualy the one who stole the pocketwatch in order to save itself from having to die over and over again, but that isnt revealed till the finale of the fourth arc

The Mask: Minor god of Manipulation and Lies. Wants the Pentagramic Pocketwatch for itself so it can become more powerful, and is ready to lie, cheat, and manipulate its way to the top. its by far one of the physicaly weakest characters, but makes up for it by being smart enough to have others fight its battles for it

The Beast: Minor god of the Hunt. wants to steal the pocketwatch to become more powerful, and is ready to kill as many people as it has to to get what it wants. also has some weird toxic old man yaoi going on with the mayor

The Reflection: Minor god of Mirrors and Self-Perception who manages to just be the worst person ever. Decided to effectively traumatize Jane and force her to work for it/be in a relationship with it just for shits a giggles and so that later it can consume her and steal her face

(anyways i might actualy need to leave for school soon so ill keep this brief)

the story has 5 different arcs, which basicaly boil down to

"Oh no were in a time loop! What are the rules of this time loop actually?"

"Okay so now that we know how the time loops works, lets try and figure out whats going on-HOLY SHIT IS THAT A CULT?!" *gets murdered* "HOLY SHIT IS THAT A MIRROR?!" *gets murdered* "HOLY SHIT IS THAT A WEIRD BEAR?!" *gets murdered*

"Oh shit you mean gods and magic are real?"

"well if everybody thinks we stole the pocketwatch, and we didnt do it, we should probably try and figure out who did."

"Well now that we know that The Day was the one who stole the pocketwatch, we should probably try and get our hands on it before and of the other people do."

[nmzuka]

Alright I did it Ranking the human characters from Primal Rage: The Avatars from least to most mischaracterized to me personally:

--Kaze and Keena They're kinda just genetic "protagonist hero" and "girl" I do like a lot of moments they had overall and dont think their characters are bad for them Keena having a crush on Kaze wasn't terrible since it obviously wasn't reciprocated but I did HATE the long bit of Keena fretting about "never feeling the touch of a man" she's 15 bro she's not thinking about that pls fuck off I do think it was lacking a lot in Keena being a child (and they kinda cop-out of doing that by saying she like matured by magic after becoming an Avatar which is lame) I don't really have that much to say in general about Kaze. I thought he was fine for being the "main character" The other characters joking about him being WAY too loyal to Blizzard (to the point of joking he wanted to fuck him) was honestly really funny tho

--Shank hard for me to fault much cause like he isnt in the book a whole lot? but I do wish they'd done more with him… he's just kinda there, does his thing, and then goes away Spoilers kinda but it was really weird that he gave a false name when he met them and then like Keena just out of no where was like "what's your real name?!" and then Malyssa knew who he was?? which I guess was the point that he hid his name so they wouldn't realize he was Chaos but they also never brought up that Malyssa knew who he was?

--Sinjin on the one hand I think Sinjin's character was kinda fun. He is sassy and a bit quippy (really like his line when all the gods got together and were roaring at each other and he just says "one big happy family…" its just so silly of him I love it) They made it a point of how good he was at rallying troops behind him and like giving these passionate speeches which is kinda fun for him to be charismatic like that but it really feels like character moments that should have been for Arik?? The book didn't even bother bringing up his want to die (I dont remember if it even brought up he was immortal? I dont think they did) that annoyed me but REALLY annoyed me when he had the line while giving a speech to the soldiers and said "we have the will to live!" made me yell HE WOULD NOT FUCKING SAY THAT!! his personal motives are just kinda dropped after a while too? like he started out playing both sides (the other Avatars and Necrosan) but that doesnt really go anywhere and once he gets the powers of being an avatar it seems like he's going to betray the Avatars because he doesnt want to release Diablo again but it just never happens? they have a lead in like he's planning something but Tor and Arik show up and he just never tries any kind of backup plan or anything? he's just fully helping the Avatars to beat Necrosan and release the gods

--Arik, Tor, Xiao Ming Im lumping all 3 together because they are honestly interchangeable in the book you could just swap the names and it wouldnt make a difference because they arent given enough character to stand out. which is a real shame! especially for Arik and Xiao Ming because I think they have a lot of interesting character possibilities with what we get from the game:

Arik is a fallen prince who wants to rebuild his kingdom and in his game ending it says how he became a greatly loved king who was known for his compassion and wisdom. He establishes a new age of peace and prosperity for humanity and its a shame the book just doesn't touch on that at all I mean they mention he's a prince but not any of his wants to help humanity

Xiao Ming is an arrogant fighter who challenged the god Slashfang to a fight and lost. Shashfang doesnt kill him tho and instead makes him his avatar in his ending he rechallenges Slashfang who says instead of a fight Xiao Ming must hunt him down He fails at this as well but over his time traveling gains a sense of humility and peace

So I always pictured his relationship with Slashfang being more bitter? it says how Xiao Ming is "disfigured" by his earlier fight with Slashfang and I dont think he was really a willing follower?? Slashfang is more trying to teach him a lesson in the book tho he's just a guy, given no sense of arrogance or anything he's just there and hanging out with Slashfang like whatever. it did annoy me too cause there was a bit where Xiao Ming and Keena think Kaze betrayed them and Keena is the one going off about what a jerk he is and shit and Xiao Ming is the one like "no he wouldnt do that would he?" when I think it should have been switched with Xiao Ming shit talking Kaze for betraying them

I did laugh when the book out right said Tor and Armadon were boring lol (Malyssa is the one to say it and I was just like "girl you get it they are so boring") but honestly that made me more sad then anything cause I had hoped to get some character ideas for Tor especially but nope he's just kinda around and is a normal dude? Armadon mentions him being afraid but never of what? like what is that suppose to mean my guy??

--Malyssa ok so like… she is my fav character in the book but also the one that bothers me the most ffff I liked how much pull she had in the story playing both sides the whole time, betraying people and then talking her way back onto their side (even tho most of the time it made no fucking sense what she was trying to do or how she was able to make the others work with her again) I just liked how important she was

what I didnt like was how much of her character was "breasted boobily down the stairs" they for some reason made her centuries old but keeping herself youthful by drinking the blood of virgin men after sleeping with them?? like okay (I dont at all mind that she liked to get it like good for her! they just kinda made it weird cause she always thinking about it) her not wearing much clothes was brought up a LOT and just talking about her "supple body" I get it she's sexy idk it just really derailed me every time and made me roll my eyes. they didnt at all bring up any of her lore from the game which also really bothered me and I think was the main reason I hated her being portrayed as she was in the book

in the game she's literally a slave to Vertigo as are all her people (magically bound to serve Vertigo) and Malyssa wants to free them she ends up tricking Vertigo and rewritting a spell that Vertigo thought would free herself into one that would free Malyssa and her people and then she leads her people with kindness and allows them to pursue freedom and happiness

which is like so good??? thats part of why I like Malyssa so much cause she's bound to one of the big bads of the series yet she herself isnt evil and wants to do good (at least for her people) I just love that for her and it feels like such a shame the book reduced her to just "sexy evil lady" (not that thats not a fun character type but just not for Malyssa I think)

anyway I know the book was just a silly thing written to promote a fighting game about giant dinosaurs so I dont hold it to being like the most amazing piece of literature ever written. It would have had to have been a lot longer to touch on all the characters lore (and honestly thinking of it now if we had instead gotten a series of books each focusing on the individual characters with a slowly intertwining story would have been amazing!!) at the end of the day I had fun reading it! But did just want to whinge a bit about the characters (because I love them a lot hhh)

[vore-scientist]

The Witch and the Prince: a Mystic Woods RoleSwap

A Tail of the (inverted!) Mystic Woods

Contains: safe/soft, non-sexual, GT vore. Female giant pred, male human prey. Refer to this as G*TS and I'll strangle you. The vore is unwilling but it's not 'distressing'. The prey is aware that the pred intends to let them go.

PITCH: Sophia is the evil half-giant witch! Yonah is the human prince. Here is the story of them meeting and well, Sophia eating Yonah! Wild isnt it? Character personalities are altered because their upbringings and species are altered (Fire Witch heritage has an impact on personality) GT, vore, shenanigans! enjoy.

This story features some nice GT art by the amazing @voreadbhar who will probably be a little startled to get this notification as the art is nearly two years old.

---

From the look on Prince Yonah’s face you wouldn’t have known it was the most eventful day in his 21 years of life. You’d think he was a little bored. Maybe a touch irritated. Not shipped off by his own mother to be captive to a man-eating half-giant witch. Who happened to be sitting, shrunken, in the seat opposite him the carriage that was taking them to her lair. 

---

The day was promising to be above average for Prince Yonah. Not amazing, not horrible, but overall positive. That wasn’t going to last long. 

He had just finished having breakfast out in the garden. Yonah liked the garden. No. He LOVED the garden. Ever Since he was young, the prince always hung out helping the groundskeepers. He had been working in the gardens since he was around 10 years old. At first his family thought the keepers were lying when they called Yonah a delight and joy to have around. The other royals had never seen Yonah show enough enthusiasm, positive or negative, to be called much of anything, least of all a delight to be around. 

See, Yonah was quiet, reserved, and strong. Very strong. Yonah was a big boy from the day he was born. And he only got bigger. Full grown, he stood at an impressive 6’9” tall. And he was built like an ogre: broad and muscular and fat. 

You may have thus guessed that was the other thing that could get him to show some semblance of emotional interest was... Food. He loved to eat. And more than that he loved to cook. When he wasn’t in the garden he was in the kitchen. Due to yonah’s mastery of the culinary arts, the castle chefs would decry when Yonah was predisposed by princely duties for a feast. Though often he would get bored of formal occasions and sneak in to help. 

But a prince couldn’t be a gardener. A prince couldn’t be a cook. 

At least his mother had waited for him to be done eating before calling him away from his garden to her office. 

Huh, there seemed to be a few more guards at the door than normal. Why the beefed up security? Maybe he’d find out. He walked in, the guards did not stop him. 

His mother’s dark skin was a contrast to his own which was merely generously sun-tanned. Her magical forest green eyes looked at him, sighed, then glanced at the woman sitting in one of chairs in front of her large marble desk.

Just looking at the back of her head… she wore a black pointed hat, and sported a segmented ponytail, barely holding in her thick wavy hair, which fell across the back of the stone chair. 

Yonah sat next to her. She looked at him with dull brown eyes and sickly brown skin. Her nostrils flared a bit and she scowled to reveal a set of large fangs. Who was this woman??? But yonah didn’t dwell on it for long. Mother was more important. 

Most people were not able to make eye contact with the Queen of Orr and the King of the Mystical Woodlands. Not with the magic of the forest shining through her eyes. Her forest green sclera and dark emerald green irises seemed to pulse with power as the prince took his seat. 

“I would apologize for disturbing you on your 21st birthday my son, but since you seemed to be fine to spend it all day eating sandwiches in the garden, I figured you wouldn’t mind.”

“Ima, I said I didn’t want anything for my birthday except to be left alone.” Yonah reminded her. 

The King lifted a brow “Yes I know. Unfortunately you’re a prince, your birthdays are supposed to be kingdom wide parties sponsored by the crown!”

Yonah looked away “I was going to bake cake for everyone at the castle”

“The castle isn’t the kingdom!” She snapped. “If you’re going to shirk princely duties you might as well do it properly and get yourself kidnapped!” 

Yonah stared at his mother. “You’re arranging for a fairytale?”

His mom sat back and smiled at him, not unlike a wicked witch from his favorite Arcane Opera. “Oh, it’s been arranged, meet your kidnapper, Sophia Ha’Esh”

She Took a breath through her smile but then it caught and she convulsed and shivered and coughed. Bringing her hands to her mouth, yonah now noticed the massive, rune inscribed iron manacles locked on her wrists and ankles. However she recovered fast, her voice still strained and weak. “I am. Happy to serve. The Wishes. Of King Maya.”  

Yonah didn’t think she was so happy. But not for any obvious reason. “Er- so shall I…” he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. “How is she supposed to kidnap me?” His mom sighed. “Yeah so here’s the deal. It’s a pain to arrange for her /Honorable/ Mage Sophia,” the sarcasm was palpable, “to do a traditional kidnapping. So I signed the paperwork saying you’ve been kidnapped and all that’s left for you to do is go live with her. Until rescued of course.” Now the King turned her gaze to Sophia, who took it incredibly well. “Listen here monster, and listen good. The prince is your captive but you cannot kill him.”

/Monster?!/ The witch rolled her eyes and said. “Im not. Stupid. What about. Rescuers?”

The king shrugged “Whatever you wish.”

The witch smiled. And… did she lick her lips!? Wait mom was saying something. 

“- already packed, the carriage is outside to take you to the Terrible Tower”

That was not a place yonah was familiar with. But it didn’t exactly strike fear into his heart. Many locations were given such grand names, it didn’t mean they were that bad, or that good in some cases. 

Prince Yonah was not happy about being sent away so suddenly. But… mother had decided… it wasn’t really his place to fight her on this. So he simply sighed and stood up. “Alright. So we leave now?” 

His mother raised an eyebrow at him, as if to be surprised he was taking this so well. Before sighing herself, as if she should have expected this from her middlest son. 

“Is that all? You’re being kidnapped and that’s all you have to say about it?” 

That was mom, always worried about his feelings. While he appreciated it, he didn’t have strong feelings one way or another. Well.... except. Now that she was pushing the subject. 

“My… My plants! In the garden, some are rare, and need taking care of! There are also special ingredients in the kitchen I want to bring with me.”

There was a brief flash of… pride? Relief? In his mother’s face. As quick as it had come, it was gone and her face was harsh and contemplative. He worried his requests, his concerns for his plants would be denied. There was a sliver of hope. Technically his mother was plants herself, and perhaps she would feel enough kinship to be compassionate! 

“Very well.” she said.

His heart, which was drifting lower in his chest, lifted, “I will need to speak to the grand master gardener-”

The King held up her hand to silence her son. “I shall personally oversee the care of your plants. No need to add more work for our gardener.”

Was she serious? She who channeled the power of a magical forest, was going to make sure his plots in the garden would thrive? She never cared so much about his hobbies before. Surely this was a joke. But his mother never joked. 

“You may also stop by the kitchen on your way out, as you are to leave without any delay.” She stood up, “I have more meetings today, you are both dismissed.”

That was it. Papers signed, and he was leaving! At least he would get to stop by the kitchen for his rare spices. As he stood up, so did Sophia. 

And he froze, as he looked… /up/ into her eyes, something he was not used to doing. she glared down at him, with an intense dislike that was not earned. She was at least a foot taller than he was! Was she some sort of disgraced fairy? No… she didn’t have enough fangs, and her ears weren’t pointed. She could be fey blooded. The extra magic in said lineage would make for a powerful witch. 

“What are. You staring at. Little Prince.”

The last time he was called little, by someone who was not a giant was when he was 12. It was so jarring he forgot he was supposed to leave the office, even as she walked out, until his mother kindly reminded him. His mother, who seemed unsurprised by the stature of Sophia. 

Three of the guards outside the door followed flanked her as she made her way down the halls and stairs. She did not try to make conversation, with them or the prince. Yonah was fine with that. 

When Yonah split off to go to the kitchen one of the guards came with him, presumably to ensure he wasn’t going to try and escape his new fairytale.  

There were a lot of tears and hugging when he told the kitchen staff what was happening. Yonah was sad too, but not enough to cry about it. He gathered his spices, and bid everyone goodbye. 

The carriage to take him to his new life was waiting next to the inner west gate. A few suitcases tied to the top, the witch inside… along with the two guards. And two more were at the reigns. Seemed like overkill to Yonah. Without any protest, he sat next to Sophia. They both barely fit on the bench, and were squished together not so comfortably. Her skin was clammy. Was she sick?

A chill went down his spine as she turned his eyes on him.

“You dont seem. So worried. About your fate.” She breathed. 

“Should I be?” he asked, genuinely wondering. 

She frowned and growled “Are captives. usually prone to talking. Back to their kidnappers?”

That made yonah a smidge irked. She had initiated the conversation! So Following her example, Yonah decided to answer with a question of his own. “Why are you chained up? Are you some sort of criminal?”

Her expression darkened before she looked away, just heaving a sigh that carried a grunt. Then the runes on her cuffs flashed, and she shivered. The guards reacted instantly, bringing up magic and raising their hands. 

Looking no less grumpy, the corners of her mouth turned up into a wide smile, and she started to laugh. 

“Careful” she huffed, “Surely you’ve. Heard the stories. And you dont want. To have to get. Your fingers Re-. Regenerated. I’ve heard it’s painful.”

Without any more pretense she lunged forward and snapped her teeth, and just in time the guards moved their hands away. She only laughed louder until another flash of the cuffs turned her mirth into a coughing fit. 

Was- was she seriously going to bite their fingers off? Or had she just been faking them out. Yonah wondered but did not dare to ask. Or speak again for the entire ride. But he did sneak glances at Sophia, not caring when they both caught each other doing so. 

Upon arrival at their destination yonah found himself practically kicked out of the carriage and his belongings thrown off in random directions. He was about to give the guards what for! How DARE they mishandle his luggage, it would be a miracle if nothing broke. However they were already speeding away. Were they not going to help him carry his things inside? This question was answered when he turned around and saw the tower. 

An old stone tower, 50ft tall and with no door, only a window at the very top. And Sophia was standing just off to the side, just under half as tall. Which answered the question as to why the guard drivers sped off. She paused to look down at him and he scrambled back as she knelt, hand reaching. He was not fast enough and was in her grip. 

“You- You’re”

“Half-giant, yes” she grinned showing off what were now obviously giant fangs. 

Her hold was not uncomfortable but neither was it comfortable. At least it felt secure! Until she started to bend over to pick up his stuff and he gripped her hand with all his might. She was no more gentle with his things than the carriage guards, shoving them into her pockets. 

When his head stopped spinning he wondered how even she was going to get into the tower! The windowsill was out of her reach. Then again his question was answered as his stomach was left on the ground because Sophia had muttered a spell and lept! One arm reaching up and she grasped the windowsill. And he was toss up onto it as well. He barely had time to realize that had happened before he had to dodge her now empty hand as it got its new grip on the inside of the window and she hauled herself up and into the room, practically falling into it.

The room was a wonder. A Perfect workshop. Tables with materials and tools, each for their own type of magic. One for enchanting, one for alchemy, one for charms, one for taking notes. And an extra! There were shelves of books and notebooks organized by theme, color, author, and year.  Plants, baskets, and cages hung from the ceiling, labeled of course. Cupboards also labeled and the one that was open had jars organized with contents in aleph-betacle order. 

He had enough time as Sophia got up to clock two cupboards made of clearly enchanted metal, one labeled flammable and one labeled corrosive. Responsible! As she stood she tried to pretend she had not just done something completely ridiculous. 

“Well?” she asked. 

Yonah was confused “Well… what? You’re my captor, i dont think i’m supposed to give you orders?”

“Right. Right. I need to set you up with a bed and… Stuff” She reached for him again and though he flinched she did not hesitate to snatch him up. 

The center of the floor had a trap door which she opened to reveal stairs. 

“Can’t put you in a guest room. No no that’s not right at all. Not a guest, a captive. Too easy to escape. I’ll need a cage. Dont have one…”

“You had some in the workshop” he pointed out. He didnt want to be kept in a cage but it was traditional. 

“Too small” she said “Also dirty… I will have to make a new cage. Or order one.”

They had only gone down one flight of stairs before she turned into the open doorway on the landing. This entered into a sitting room, a few more bookshelves were on the walls though none were more than 20% filled with book and much of the space between with knick-knacks. Light came from the magical windows but there were also lamps on the walls and the two tables. Which had dirty dishes and… socks? On them. 

She walked through this room into one of the two hallways that branched out from it. This had many doors, each different shape, size, and aesthetic. Some were beautiful! Some rotting away. Others plain, and still others a bit indescribable. 

Sophia opened a plain one. It was a storage room and she placed Yonah on her shoulder as she rummaged around a bit. Shelves upon shelves fo so much junk yonah could  barely tell items apart! And not to speak of the pile in the center under racks of hanging items many of which were not clothing. 

“Ah HA!” she said and held up massive treasure chest. She opened it and dumped the gold and jewels into a sack which she tossed back into the room “This will do!” then she emptied her pockets of his things onto a shelf and closed the door. 

“Do? As what?” though he had a sinking suspicion-

“You’re bed! So I can lock you up at night and you cant escape while i sleep. Dont worry its not air tight, and I’ll put in pillows and and stuff” 

“Blankets?”

���Those too.” And took the next half hour to find all these things scattered around this floor of the tower. Some of the doors in the hallway led to those guest rooms Sophia had mentioned earlier and for many of those she had to reduce to enter. Enter through doors that were not there until she reduced in size and turned the doorknob.

But that wasnt what surprised him. 

“You can shrink?” 

Sophia looked at him like his head had turned into a flower. “Do you have short term memory problems? I was shrunk at the castle, and for the ride there and back.” 

It took a few seconds of awkward silence for Yonah to realize what he needed to clarify. “I thought that was something the guards did.”

“No, it’s a spell I modified.”

“How so?”

For the first time since being in her presence her demeanor no longer had an undercurrent of tense hostility. 

“Normal shrinking spells are temporary and require an annoying amount of set up! Even a wizard who has the spell stored in their staff needs an activating circle! That’s so inconvenient and I needed to be able to shrink wherever and whenever i wanted” 

Yonah continued to collect things from the room he wanted for his, hopefully temporary, bed chamber, as Sophia expounded on the construction of her reduction enchantment. For that is what it was. She was enchanted, permanently, with the ability to shrink for three hours at a time to about a third of her natural height. 

The technical workings were nonsense to the prince but he still listened as he dragged out a mattress that he was confident would fit in the chest. Sophia gathered pillows and blankets. 

“That is very ingenious,” Yonah commented when she finished her explanation of the spell. “And practical. Speaking of which, where are you going to be keeping me?” 

For some reason that made her angry. “For now? In my room.” and she stepped out, returned to her normal size. She did not wait for him to walk out of the room to reach for him. 

“Couldn't my things be brought to your room too?” he asked. “You ask a lot of questions” she didn't answer him but did not retrieve his things from the hall closet… storage room… thing. She did go to her room, which was the biggest disaster yet. 

It was difficult to take it all in, as most surfaces were covered in… Yonah was sure it was mostly clothing but there were books, papers, and random other items. Judging by the smell there was no rotting food. This made sense, giants had sensitive senses of smell, either that or her inclination to be messy stopped at leaving food out. There was still a mild stink of clothes that needed to be washed. 

Sophia pulled at a pile of clothes that was next to the largest pile of clothes to reveal a nightstand on which she placed the chest and stuffed it with the items from the ransacked guest room. She didnt stop Yonah when he scrambled down to remove everything and do it all over again to make something that would potentially be comfortable to an actual human being. 

For a moment he thought about testing it to see if it needed adjusting but turned around to find Sophia face down in the largest pile of clothing. For another moment he thought she had died but that made no sense. For yet another moment he thought she was being dramatic. It was neither. She was sleeping. 

Or so he thought, for one final moment. 

“Dont fucking try” her muffled voice warned as he leapt from the nightstand and started to make his way to the door. 

Nevermind she was being dramatic. 

“Ugh I want to take a nap, i HATE wearing those cuffs i just want to sleep forever. But im also hungry.”

If her contract hadnt clearly stated that she couldn't hurt him… permanently… Yonah would be worried that he was lunch. Instead the mention of food provided a spark of hope. Lunch meant food preparation. And food preparation meant a kitchen! Then the spark died as the fear of the likely appalling condition of the kitchen loomed its head.

It was… bad. But not as bad as his fears. Pots and pans were piled up but were clean and on the stove. The oven was also stuffed. There were a few jars of items that should have been kept in a cold room that had to be full of poison now, but most of the clutter was non-food items, or dried spices. 

The desire to cook was overwhelming but the fear of the witch was overpowering. The fear of what she was going to cook… he was trying not to think about it as he was sure she was eyeing him hungrily. So he backed away to let her do whatever it was she was going to do. 

Quickly it became clear why the kitchen was in such a state. Sophia disappeared into a pantry and returned with eggs larger than his head but were like quail eggs in her hands. She took one pot from the stack and filled it with water, dropping the eggs in. At least 2 dozen. With a snap of her fingers a spark was sent to the stove. She stuck a finger into the water and her eyes blazed, a moment later the water boiled. 

The rest of the prep was frustratingly simple. She got out bread, sliced it, and with her own hands toasted them. Not evenly, each slice had a handprint. And she retrieved onions, which were as large as the eggs. Both her and yonah had tears in their eyes from her attempt to slice them. 

“Did you build this kitchen?” yonah asks.

“No, it came perfectly sized for myself, in a tower that was run by a smallfolk sorcerer!” she snapped with sarcasm. 

That was all he needed to hear to shut him. So he started to wander around, and soon found what he was looking for. Tucked away in a cupboard, human sized implements. Sophia was concentrating so hard she didn’t notice, or didnt show that she noticed. 

He found all sorts of stuff hidden away, tools, fuel, spices, oils. He took some of the unburnt portions of her bread and toasted them, with a toaster. And with his spices and herbs he made a sauce in the oil.He even added some of the dried pepper after crushing it as best he could. Then he waited for the eggs. 

By then she HAD noticed what he was doing and didnt stop him, but neither did she help him as he had to travel back and forth from cupboards to the counter top with how equipment and ingredients. She only handed him a single egg when she felt they had been boiling for long enough. 

“STOP!” he couldnt help himself as she reached into the boiling pot of water and she starred at him as if seeing him for the first time. Then she stuck her hand in fished out the eggs. 

“How- are you a-”

“FireWitch, yes. Well. I’m half,” she answered as she mashed the eggs, the yolks still a bit runny, With the shells left on. And yonah felt very protective of his own egg. The shell was thick! He had to use a meat mallet to crack it and he narrowly avoided the still scalding inside. 

Sophia had finished preparing her horrorshow of a meal. The mashed eggs were seasoned with salt and a concerning amount of dried pepper. Then onto the bread she put the onion bits and the egg. The sickening CRUNCH as she took a bite of the sandwich nearly put him off making his own. 

As it was he needed her help. He couldnt touch the egg without burning himself, and she couldnt burn. 

“Can you run this under some cold water?” he asked, putting more effort than he wanted to admit into keeping his voice level. 

The wait for her to answer was worse than the grating crunches of egg shell as she pondered his request. Then he had to leap back as she reached for him out of nowhere! “I’m sorry I-” he began, not knowing how to apologize to avoid punishment. 

She chuckled and continued to reach, until she was gently pinching his egg. Again her eyes lit up, softer, a friendly orange. “There” she said. 

And she said nothing more as he worked to shell the egg enough to carve off some of the white and release some yolk. Like Sophia had, Yonah mixed the white and yolk together, but unlike sophia he used more than salt for seasoning. He drizzled his sauce on each side of the bread, took the onions and peppered them, and completed his creation. It wasnt anything special, but at least it tasted good. 

Sophia was hovering over him by now. The look of hunger from before even more intense, and she had just eaten! While Yonah was a large human, known for a large appetite, he found himself unable to eat more than half before his nerves tightened his stomach. 

No sooner had he set his food down than it was snatched up by sophia. And for a moment the harshness that lingered on her face vanished. An instant later it was back. 

“Why is yours so much better than mine!?” she demanded. 

That spooked him for a moment before he got excited “Would you like me to show you?”

There wasn’t a moment hesitation before she answered “yes.” Then “but not right now” 

She reached for the rest of his egg. Still mostly intact and still with the shell and popped it into her mouth. The crunch and the trickle of yolk nearly made him lose his lunch. He was lucky he didn’t when she then scooped him up. 

“right now is time for gardening” 

It took until his head stopped spinning and they were in Sophia’s bedroom… his and Sophia’s bedroom… that he processed what she had said. Surely he had imagined it. 

Then she disrobed and put on a plaid shirt and overalls, swapping her witch’s hat for a straw hat. 

“I don’t have an outfit for you.” She commented once she was dressed. Now she had on boots and gardening gloves. 

Oh! “My suitcases.” 

The suitcases which were in the storage room. Instead of fetching them she once again picked him up and took him to the closet. He didn’t know which suitcase it was in because his mom had the servants pack up his things so it took a bit of time to find his own set of gardening clothes. It probably wasn’t that long but it felt like it under the watchful eyes of the witch. And no, she didn’t take him back to the room to get dressed. He had to so on a shelf in the cold musty room.

He should have anticipated being snatched up again the moment he was dressed but he didn’t and he was. What he could not anticipate was the method of getting down to her garden. 

She jumped. Out the window. 

He did not stay on his feet when she placed him on the ground and said a spell that reduced her size again. He used the gardening tools that she took from her hat and handed to him to stand up. 

The garden was both a dream and a nightmare. It was well kept, amazingly kept! In terms of the health of the plants. Organization wise it was a disaster. She had clearly tried to have a system which fell apart at some point. 

And the plants. The variety almost equaled the palace. Sophia had to keep reminding him that “he do exactly as she orders.” But it was so hard. He saw so many areas he could immediately start to work on. Trim, weed, water, harvest. But this wasn’t his garden. It was hers. And she had not planned on having an assistant. 

While he was familiar with a majority of the flora, there was a great deal he had only read about. And many of those were extremely dangerous. Of course those were the ones Sophia had him help the most with. 

When the gardening was finished he had been scratched, bitten, burned, stung. But he was happy. 

Until they were back in the workshop. Sophia was pacing. She had at least taken him and his luggage to her room and they changed back into day clothes. 

Yonah had no idea what he should be doing. He expected Sophia to demand something of him any moment. So all he could think to do was pace as well. All over the desk. Exploring but not really registering bc much of the clutter. 

Then his prediction came true. 

“Listen up prince!”

Sophia said out of nowhere. 

Yonah immediately froze and stood at attention. 

“You’re mine now! Do you understand what that means?”

Prince Yonah stood on the workshop desk, hands behind his back, a disinterested look on his face. He breathed in. 

“Ive read books. You’ll keep me in a cage until someone comes to rescue me.” His tone drolled, “in the meantime I’m to sing and dance for you and suchlike. I’m a decent singer, but I need a partner for most-.”

Two hands slammed down on either side, and the wicked witch smiled and snarled in his face. 

“WRONG!” She somehow managed to bellow in a high pitched excited manner. “IT MEANS I’VE GOT A NEW TOY, A NEW LAB RAT! A NEW SNACK!”

That got a reaction. 

“Did you say Snack?”

Impossible as it might seem, her grin got larger. It occurred to Yonah she was baring her teeth. Her very large, very pointed, teeth. 

“YES! I’m going to eat you!” She declared like it was some sort of party she just invited him to. “Smallfolk taste very good! And you taste…” 

Narrowing her eyes she lowered her face so they were nearly eye to eye. Her eyes were quite stunning. Very warm brown, almost like red clay. They were full of excitement and manic energy. 

Then she licked him. Just on his cheek. It was kinda like being kissed by a giant dog, it was a strangely innocently affectionate action. It was also extremely gross. 

“You taste incredible! How can I not eat you!?”

Yonah tried and failed to wipe the drool from his face. 

“Because my mother will kill you? Aren’t you supposed to keep me alive?” He recalled her saying so in her royal office. 

She straightened up and did not stop smiling. 

“Yes! That means we’ve got a fun challenge ahead of us!” She didn’t wait for him to ask what that would be, she was too hyped.

“We’ve got to figure out how to ensure your safety,”

/That’s nice I guess/ thought the prince.

“Before I eat you out of boredom,” 

/oh.../ not that nice. 

“Actually, before I mess up!” She corrected, “I plan to eat you…tonight! Sort of like initiation as my minion! And dessert! Two for one!” She raised two fingers and closed her eyes in a fashion that, on another world, would be called kawaii.

“So… you plan to come up with this safety method before-“

“Oh no!” She shook her head “I’ll just spit you up before you die! Unless I mess up, like I said. There’s always that chance.”

Not wanting to admit his fear Yonah made an observation, “You’ve done that before?”

“Sure have!” She put her fists on her hips and looked rather proud of herself, “And it ain’t easy at my size, let me tell you. Much less work to just let you tasty little fuckers die.” 

Yonah restrained himself from asking about her kill to mercy ratio, but he did think about it. It didn’t really matter since she had to be merciful for him. Though the way she talked about it made it sound like she’d accidentally killed folks that she meant to let go… And that she cared very little about her own life if she was willing to take that chance eating him. 

Oh right. Back to the important part. She was going to eat him. And there wasn’t really anything he could do to stop her. The only glimmer of hope was that she said it was difficult for her. While Yonah didn’t really care, he wasn’t proud nor ashamed to admit it: he was fat. Maybe she would choke trying to swallow him whole. They could both die. Two for one. 

But that was tonight. It was now mid-afternoon, and it looked like the witch had plans unrelated to him. Not that he cared. 

Not that she cared either. She was moving around all sorts of things, not giving him any mind. Yonah kept having to dodge out of the way as she kept placing and replacing things on the workbench, like she just had to choose today to organize her shit. Books, bottles, boxes, sacks, and even a small (for her) black cauldron. He was grateful that instead of dropping the cauldron on top of him, she just swept him aside, almost over the side of the workbench. Finally she seemed ready to do some real work. 

It was quite the show. Writing notes, mixing powders and crystals and spices and liquids, using magic words, or waving a wand in a specific motion. He had pegged the witch as unfocused, most likely to get distracted, but she worked steadily. Every so often she would get excited or frustrated and her eyes would flash orange. Yonah was impressed, even if she kept side-eying him like one would a piece of cake they were saving for later but really wanted to eat now. 

“Uh,” he said, and she yelped, dropping her quill and splattering ink across the notebook. She glared at him but he kept going, “Are you um. Working that safety method?”

All of the previous irritation left her eyes but it was replaced by bemused confusion and she cocked her head, “Why would I do that?”

Yonah shrugged and blinked but did not say anything. 

“This is an enchantment my good friend Myran sent me a week ago, I'm improving it!” she went back to her work. 

“What’s it supposed to do?” Yonah asked, curious despite himself. Big mistake. 

Sophia turned to him and flicked some of the dried flakes that were in a small bowl into his face. He’d seen her make these, rolling out a paste so thin and then drying it. She said some words and Yonah felt his skin start to fizz like someone dunked him in carbonated water. 

“I feel all floaty,” Yonah tried to say but was really woozy. 

“Drat it!” he heard from his fog. No not a fog, his glasses had come off! But he couldnt; move his feet without feeling nauseated. 

“Sophia, glasses!” he didn’t really think shed help him out but he felt his spectacles slide onto his face. How had she avoided poking his eyes out??

It didn’t help as much as he thought it would but he saw the world around him again. He lifted his arms towards the face of the witch who was very angry and he didn;t know why. 

“What happened, what did you do?”

Her eyes glowed and she slammed a fist on the table, “nothing! The spell didn’t work right!” she spat. 

“I think I’m done working for today” she growled and his stomach dropped. She was eyeing him hungrily again, but this time was different. This time it was serious. 

“Do you really have to eat me?” 

“No! I don’t,” she said, but Yonah didn’t get any hopes up, “I want to eat you.”

“Can I at least take my nice clothes off?”

Sophia made a very childish face that didn’t suit an evil giant witch. Sticking out her tongue and wrinkling her nose in disgust. 

“Eat you naked? Gross!” 

At least they were in agreement on that. Yonah sighed, “No… I’ll keep my undergarments on.”

The change was immediate, “Oh! Then yes, that sounds great!” She rested her head on the table in her folded arms, eyes wide with anticipation, a bit like a cat who spotted a still living mouse in a mouse trap. 

“Uh, you want me to- strip. Here?” 

She nodded, “Either you do it or I’ll try my best not to break your limbs doing it myself.”

He undressed as fast as he could. Under his suit he had on silken undershorts. When he started to fold up his clothes Sophia snorted, reached out a hand and took them away into her sleeve. 

Then with the same hand, scooped up the prince, and sat up, leaning back in her chair with a smile. The prince was shaking. 

“Don’t worry too much, I’m sure you’ll be fine.” then, “One last thing, I’ll give you a choice, feet first or head first?”

Wow, how nice. “F-feet?” he didn’t really think about it. And apparently neither did she. 

Then she opened her mouth very wide, a bit wider than should have been possible. And he got a very good look down into it as he was lifted up by his armpits above her head. 

A fanged jaw and eager maw.

Then he descended. 

Ohhhh why did he take his shoes off? His feet slipped on her tongue, though he was grateful she placed it over her bottom teeth. His stomach still brushed against the top teeth, almost stopping him from even fitting, but ever the helpful one he sucked in his gut so as his legs were pulled into the throat, his chest was entirely in her mouth. His form was inched downwards with small successive swallows, the tongue against his back, tasting him and keeping him steady. 

She was swallowing very gently, at least, he assumed, because he’d barely noticed it. Yes there was a pulling force, but it wasn’t sharp. He still worried that she wouldn’t be able to get him down, and she would choke, and well. That would be that! 

There was a definite pause as his face passed between the teeth, and his waist was at the throat. He felt her tense around him, and then a much stronger, much more crushing force, shoved at him, dragging him into the confined space of her esophagus. A few more of those, which he was sure might break a few bones but thankfully did not, and his entire body was encased in the smooth moist muscle. Or well. Not all of it. But the horrible pounding of his own heart and hers and the fact that he could not breathe? He didn’t really think about how his calves were dangling in the stomach. He didn’t really want to think anymore. 

Then more pushing, gentle again, and his feet hit a slimy squishy surface. Ohhh no. Soon he was forced into the chamber. A stinking, deadly chamber, the only upside was that it wasn’t constricting. He still filled up the entire space, stretching it to what had to be the near limit. He was breathing so hard he just barely noticed that Sophia was too. Gasping and heaving. Ok he did notice, because every breath into her lungs pressed down on him, and the rolling of her chest rolled around him. 

“Shit” she wheezed, “That was fucking hard, you’re really fat.”

She sounded annoyed at him, as if he should apologize to her for making her eat him at his current weight. Well. He had no plans to lose any pounds. She could just suffer. 

“Gods alive, I don’t think I've eaten anyone so big before, ugh.”

“Don’t tell me you’re regretting it,” he very much wanted her to say that, as he tried to stretch out as much as possible. 

She moaned, as if his presence was painful. “Don’t move so much,” she said, and for some reason he obliged. “I don't regret anything. You were delicious, and I’m just a little overstuffed. I’m sure I’ll get used to it.”

Oh joy, she planned to keep on eating him, even if the experience caused her pain. She truly was crazy. 

There had been more than a few moments that Sophia had seriously reconsidered trying to eat the prince. She had felt her front teeth push against his middle, but somehow he still slipped through her mouth and into her throat.Then when she swallowed past his legs, her esophagus was strained badly she thought he would get stuck. For a brief moment she couldn't breathe, but with determination she continued to swallow and it got easier from there. Still she was panting for air even after the first minute. 

Now it felt like she had swallowed a halt-giant sized bowling ball, even if, confoundingly, it did not look like it. It reminded her of… there was like that one time when she caught two thieves and had the brilliant idea to eat them both at the same time. Actually that wasn’t as bad. Once in her stomach she was definitely a little too full but swallowing them had not been such an ordeal. 

As she breathed more and more easily and made slightly coherent responses to the prince wriggling in her poor stomach, a terrible thought struck her.

What if she couldn’t spit him back up! It had been an almost impossible ordeal to get him down. But she would have to, she couldn’t kill him. Not that she cared about his life, but her own was very much on the line, as the prince had kindly told that afternoon. 

However she could worry about that in five minutes. For now she tried to relax and take whatever enjoyment she could from this situation. The prince had tasted amazing, especially with only minimal clothing on! How nice of him to have insisted upon it. She placed a hand over her full stomach. Curious, she pressed down a bit. 

“Hey! What’s that!” The prince jerked under her palm and she winced as her stomach was stretched again. All in all the pain wasn’t BAD, it was just a bit annoying. She was confident her stomach would stretch over time. 

“My hand, you idiot!” She hissed and pressed her fingers down more forcefully, “I told you to stop moving so much!” 

She drummed her fingers over her swollen middle and was pleased to hear the prince grumble. 

“It’s hard to breathe in here,” he complained.

“I know,” she said, "plenty of her victims had been so kind to tell her, “but I won't let you pass out.” though she wasn’t so sure… She hoped he wouldn’t. Since he knew she was going to spit him out, he wouldn’t struggle against her and use up his air as fast. And as long as he was conscious he could help by orienting himself into a much more streamline position. The other benefit to less struggle was it kept the pain low, and the fullness pleasant. Even as she continued to bother him. For several minutes. 

Finally she could breathe normally, and that made her pissed off because it was soon time to get the prince out. The pain had started to dull enough so she could really appreciate how filling her prince was. She really needed a way to keep him safer for longer. There was a sharp movement under her hand. 

“It’s! Starting! To! Sting!” He cried, clearly out of breath. 

Not one to show any weakness Sophia groaned with immense disappointment, “fiiiiiiine, I’ll get you out. Don’t fight against it.”

“Why would I-” but then he felt it, the stomach constricting violently. Before it had been gently rolling, now it stiffened, and tried to shove him through the small tough ring of flesh he’d come through. It wasn’t working so well. The hacking got more forceful yet it didn’t seem to be helping. But he needed to get out, especially as the fluids were starting to rise. 

Guess he had to be proactive. He put his hands together like an olympic diver and pushed them into the esophagus, took a deep breath, and tried to make a large enough space to get his arms and head into, stretching out his legs against the other side of the stomach. With the organ so tense it did not give way and make him slip back, but it was still nearly impossible to get purchase. 

It worked. 

A few more retches and Sophia pressing interlocked fists into her stomach, the prince somehow re-entered the tight tube of flesh that really would rather he have stayed where he was and died. The flesh tube’s owner however was not having it. And he slowly made his way upward. 

This was so much worse than swallowing him! She practically punched herself in the stomach, hoping that wouldn’t hurt the prince, and didn’t feel that much joy when he eventually was pushed out of her stomach. Her throat complained loudly and she had to ignore it and the instinct to swallow the prince back down. 

She was grateful that his hands were the first thing back in her mouth and she reached in to pull him out. Luckily she did not dislocate his shoulders or rip off his arms. He slid out onto the desk, sticky and coughing as she took deep breaths that pressed against an aching chest. Still worth it. 

Now of course she was missing her feeling of fullness. So she took her sticky prince and carried him with her to the kitchen, dropping him in the sink and turning the faucet before opening the cupboard to grab bread, peanut butter, and jelly to make a quick sandwich.

Yonah washed and dried off while Sophia observed with some sort of amusement, like one watching a pet hamster. All on her own she remembered she had his clothes. But said she’d keep them for now, he needed to get into pjs not a suit! She was right but that meant he was standing in his undies. 

“Want some?” The witch broke off a corner piece of the sandwich and held it out to him. 

Again he was reminded of a pet hamster. Still he took it. Sure he’d just been eaten but He was hungry, especially after eating so little for luch. Now that he thought about it, Sophia had been kind to wait so many hours before eating him so that her stomach was empty. Now that he though about it more, she probably just didn’t want to barf up her food, rather than do this for his comfort. 

The PB&J was really good, even she couldn’t mess that up, considering she didn’t make any of the components. The corner was lacking in jelly so it was a bit dry but much less sticky. 

A very pleasant but awkward end to his first night as her captive. Many more minuses than plusses, but as they sat munching on late night sandwiches, they weren’t enemies. And he knew one thing for certain, life with Sophia wasnt going to be boring. 

——

[FIN. i hope to write more little adventures in the inverted mystic woods! Sophia is a wild witch and Yonah a bit of a funny lump. Thanks for reading]

[yellowbluemoonshine]

Hi, hope you're doing well.

Yuzuriha fanarts and, of course, cosplays seem to have skyrocketed after the anime's release and while this had a positive effect on the series' popularity, I can't help but think many people are missing out on Yuzuriha's character. Plot (and fan service -_-) aside, looking at her character individually, she's a finely written character. We don't get to see many logical and pragmatic female characters who can hold their own and actually fight without being a burden in Japanese media. And I find her, for lack of a better word, "tough girl" act overall quite satisfying especially when her concealed feelings were revealed and explored towards the end of the manga. This made me want to read her part in the light novel, which I am planning to do soon. Anyway, I was wondering what you think of her and her relationship with the rest of the cast and her relevance to the plot.

Hi. Thanks for the ask, anon. I hope, you are doing well too.

General Opinion on Yuzuriha;

And you explained really well. She is fine character but she is also used as fan service and comic relief a lot which is a shame so anyway, here's my general opinion on her and her relationships.

She is fine character;

She is smart. She cooparates with others in a situtions that she cant survive on her own. This also means a lot of interesting interactions between different characters. She fight well and she is independent. We dont have much female characters, especially good ones so its nice that she is in the story as good character. She is pretty. She gives fan services but at least, she still has character. She is femme fatale, a pretty woman who seduces men for her own gain and drives them to dangerous situtions. Her fighting style also fits this side of her. She is funny so at least she gives comic relief to the series. Most characters are too serious so sometimes, it's fun to have a character who is chill.

As personality, she seems to similar to Toma at first sight. They both are mysterious, kinda sadistic, they always give a smile and pretend to be trustworthy only to usually betray for their own gains and they both has earth element etc but i think she is a lot similar to Chobei in a way she is independent, she is naughty girl who wants to do whathever she wants. She is pleasure person. She doesnt care about shame to survive. She lies and she is very social, this part of her is a lot like Chobe. Only difference is Chobei wants to be leader and dominates others while Yuzuriha usually prefers to play safe. She has her own agenda. She is also very realistic or negative like Gabimaru. They both are ninjas, after all.

Though her motivation as villain was explored more because it would make sense why Sagiri is so protective of her and she would actuall have an answer to Isuzu when she said 'think about her victims and their families'. And honestly she has a point.

She is Good Big Sister;

The most interesting part of her for me is that she is actually good sister. She became ninja to gain money for her little sister. She risked her life for her many times and still tried to make her happy. And the reason she wants to live for long time isnt just because for herself. Its most likely a promise she made with her sister. And we only learn this when she is about to die, that story she told before is actually real. Jigokuraku is a story that explore humanity of criminals and Yuzuriha is one of them. She is not just bad guy for the sake of it. Her love for her sister and her motivation also gives depth to her character.

I think this wasnt mentioned enough because Chobe usually overshadow her as big brother but i think its different. I am just gonna say it. Chobei is crazy. His love with for Toma is crazy. Thats just him and Toma. Yuzuriha is good, great big sister actually and this should be talked more.

I am mentioning this because usually 'brocon/siscon' siblings love shine more but their love or obsessions is too much sometimes. So its sad to to see they overshadow just your usual loving big sister/brother. And thats very unfair.

Fake Death Scene;

I think this really ruined her character and made it hard to take her seriously after that fake death scene. She has clearly 'last moments' scene which is perfect way to end her character but she suddenly comes out of nowhere. And not only her survival doesnt make sense, and also ruined the death scene but also, her staying in story did nothing for the plot. Whether that scene shouldnt have portrayed as death or she shouldve stayed death.

(Similar thing happenned with Chobe but it was obvious that he survived with the way Toma hold him nad problem isnt him surviving at that scene but it show it happens and the whole baby thing is ridicilous.)

At least, this couldve been good chance to explore Yuzuriha's humanity tooo, but her backstory wasnt explored the way Gabi and Chobei's story was. Not just Yuzuriha, Toma and many other characters too, wasnt explored much. Though, i think thats one of the main issues with Jigokuraku. (Another issue is it shouldve been more 'dont tell, show' thing). We didnt explore much even though there were so many different characters, different interactions, there wasnt much development. For example, it would be interesting plot if some point she betrayed the main group but eventually felt regret and came back to them maybe.

Sagiri and Yuzuriha;

I think its fine ship but its full yuri fan service. My biggest issue with this is Yuzuriha suddenly flirt iwth Sagiri out of nowhere and at some point, Sagiri is okay? with it, also out of nowhere. If only we could explore why they suddenly attract towards each others (other than 'oh hot woman'). Like, why Yuzuriha suddenly likes her out of all people? Gabimaru also has idea of justice, just like Sagiri. She also has a fan, Senta who seems to admire her personality. And same with Sagiri too. She was so stubborn with her rules even against someone like Gabimaru who is victim but then she sayd 'you are not a villain' to Yuzuriha even though she doesnt know anything about her story.

Though logically you can guess Yuzuriha (also just like Toma) likes people who would do anything for her and protects her. There is a soft side to her. My only issue is that there is no development and their interaction seems out of nowhere. And also Sagiri always think about Gabimaru more than anything so its weird. But otherwise, i like fanarts. Their personality fits each others. Serious innocent girl x Chill naughty girl. Its very fun idea, but in canon story, i dont think its well explored.

Her Other Interactions;

I feel like her love for Sagiri overshadow her other interactions. She was like a big sister to Nurugai and Mei. She was good ally to Gabimaru after some point. She even teased Toma. She gets to be taught by handsome teacher Shion, that was her request. There is also interesting parallels between her and Senta. Senta who is lying to himself btu honest to others and Yuzuriha who is only true to herself but lying to others. He views her as free and admires her but her hiding hearth from anyone isnt a good thing so i wish we explore more of this. Its a shame we didnt get more of it. Anyway she clearly likes them too.

Summary;

I am not a big fan of her but i think she is fine character, her being good big sister should be talked more and i wish we get to explore her inner world and interactions more, same for other characters too.

[d0d0-b0i]

(SPOILER FILLED) alrighty, time for some more cohesive thoughts on prime for me (since my last one was written directly after finishing it and now its had time to sit in my brain) (long post btw, i ramble @w@)

overall, i very much enjoyed it! the animation had me positively salivating over the fact that its /actually/ using animation techniques and not just. moving characters from A to B without the time for proper stylization. the overall plot was enjoyable and i am excited to see what the rest of the season will offer.

the fact that it is only one-third of the whole season also makes me a lot more forgiving about certain flaws i found at first, like only showing three worlds and not giving the characters a lot of time to breathe. theres the very high likelihood that such a thing actually will happen, and we might even see more places and worlds, which is an exciting thought! nonetheless, going in i did not know this as i was sleep deprived and had forgotten how many episodes the season has, so i felt a little bit salty, ngl.

Devon Mack does a very good job as sonic, and it makes me feel warm inside hearing his portrayal! every actor does a great job honestly, and it truly feels like they all understand the respective character they voice act(especially considering they have to acclimate the character /and/ voice for each new world. very talented!). the eggman voice actor could use some rerecords at times honestly;; but he does a good enough job that i only notice it sometimes; and he is fun to listen to regardless, and is just a subjective thought of mine.

the different universes also intrigue me! :D i really enjoyed the first one the jungle one was interesting and had beautiful flora models, but it is with this one that a problem of mine arises (but ill get to that later). the waterworld was also interesting, but kind of boring worldwise, since its just. water. (i get that its a pirate world and thats fine! i just cant give a good description of my feelings besides just. water. yknow?)

ive seen that a lot of people think rouge shouldve been the captain in the third world and. honestly. yeah. i think we might get to see why later on? but idk. i hope they have a reason that makes sense as to why she isnt, like if the worlds stick around and dont fuse back, shed be the next captain? weh! (i do love knuckles in a captains outfit though, so bonus points for that!)

now. i only have a few “criticisms”, and although some can be attributed to not being intended for me(and i will therefore not include cus. duh), there is one thing i just cannot let slip by.

(CRITIQUE START) the issue i have is that it feels so empty. new yolk (i refuse the yoke) is populated, but later episodes only really reuse the same five models roughly multiple times and i think had at most like 30? of them at the same time, and obviously could not have had more due to budget and such (which is understandable, but that still doesnt mean i cant point it out).

the jungle episodes! THE JUNGLE EPISODES?? ONLY HAD 5?? CHARACTERS MINUS SONIC (froggy counts) AT ALL TIMES?? and even the flashbacks only show those, probably so as not to imply death but like. come on. not even a few background characters at all? am i meant to believe they will all die out anyway simply by being the last people on this earth? im sorry i just cant get over this. you can make sean mcloughlin, mr jacksepticeye, get a cameo and his own personal character model, BUT CANNOT EVEN FILL A JUNGLE WITH PEOPLE?? did i miss something? if theyd shown even /one/ bg character once in a single frame in the flashbacks, id forgive it but i. cannot. im sorry. im nitpicking but come on! this is like the only issue i have. you only have 11 of the original characters in the first place (sonic. tails. knuckles. amy. rouge. big. froggy. shadow. eggman. orbot. cubot.), and then half of them are pretty much gone most of the time.

i just. its so empty? DO NOT GET ME WRONG I HATE WHEN THAT HAPPENS. I DEEPLY ENJOY THIS SHOW! I LOVE THE CHARACTERS WEVE GOTTEN TO SEE !!! THAT DOES NOT MEAN I CANNOT COMPLAIN ABOUT SOMETHING I HAD TROUBLE PROCESSING. if its gonna be a show about sonic and his friendships. where the fuck are the rest of them? is all we’re gonna get homages to their characters? (jungle knuckles was just sticks. come on now. just put her in shes already canon to the mainline games now) sega, if youre going to make a show about his friendships, why wont you let his friends be there? why can you only license 11 of your characters to the show? please make me eat my words.

and yeah you could say that the reasons others arent there (in-canon, not because of legal issues) is because they werent hit close-up with the prism shatter, but neither was big? he was shown to be down by the hills when it exploded, and i dont know if that counts considering that orbot and cubot arent even in any episode besides the first one, and they werent visible in the blast, i do not know what the blast radius would be to affect anything else. eugh. idk man. this is like the ONE issue i have, and its so small it feels meaningless. yeah yeah the budget the tight grip on characters yadda yadda i get the reasons behind it but it still affects the endgoal and i should be allowed to point it out.                                                                                                                     (CRITIQUE OVER)

that being said. i am in love with the character designs! especially a big fan of sonics gloves and shoes in the pirate world. i fuck w/ that very much <3

anyway, thats it. show good. binge it if possible! we need netflix to know that we like this. and maybe theyll realize that one episode per week for this show would be perfect (im looking at you episode recaps)