#and oh would you look at that someone is here to rebound-

[azaharinflames]

I can see the show slowly banking away from the queer arc. A soft retcon of Bucks bisexuality would also be perfect to continue baiting without having to either follow through or fear queerbait accusations again. Buck continues to only date women from now on, they never mention his sexuality ever yet Oliver is free to play Buck as queer as he always wanted. And by that I think he meant sending horny looks Eddies way to keep his base happy and engaged. It's really win/win for them. They got all the cloud for it last season, they could bait for another 15 seasons now all while not having to actually put any thought in how to tell a queer story.

Hi, Nonnie! Thanks for the ask.

See, in my mind, there are again two creatures:

One agrees with you, and definitely believes from now on Buck will only have female LIs. Most likely short relationships to keep Buck as the eternal bachelor of the series (like @unfuckablebogtroll said, have him be the Olivia Benson of 911), and then they'll put together a last-minute LI once they know the series is canceled (perhaps a female LI no one really knows, like Natalia, perhaps Tommy in a rushed right-person-wrong-time SL. I can definitely see both). If someone asks, well - he's bi! so him dating women exclusively doesn't erase that. Which, true, but in this context it is all much trickier than that.

One that disagrees with you, if anything because I don't want to become too negative or too cynical*. Because, yeah, sure, they can move on from Buck's bisexuality, but that is an insane bad look on them. If they still want to be praised and be recognised for their diversity and inclusion, it won't be it. Because, as I said, as much as a bisexual person is still bisexual even if they only date people from the opposite sex, fact is that in television things are trickier. Because it isn't as easy as just knowing something, they have to show it. Things are held to a different standard, and that's just the name of the game. So if Buck were to only date women moving forward, that would mean 1. a bad look on them, kinda like they lured their queer audience in (some of which had given up on the series already), only to bait them and 2. I honestly believe they would face some serious backlash for this. Of course, I cannot say this will happen, but I would be surprised if it hadn't.

All in all, we know there is a rebound in the near future, and I will be honest, I'm fully expecting that rebound to be a woman. I will be pleasantly surprised if he rebounds with a man - as much as we know the relationship is very short-lived, as Tim has already warned.

We'll see - I'm one of them that believes that, for Buck, it's either growing back together with Tommy, or nothing. And nothing as in - he'll be the eternal bachelor until the series ends, because I truly believe they won't be able to find a LI that tops Tommy, or one the audience falls half in love with, in comparison to how much they loved Tommy. So. I might be wrong on this one, but I truly think that, long-term, it's either getting back together with Tommy, or a string of half-assed and unfulfilling LI until the very end of the series.

Oh! I also want to add - I don't see the 'throwing glances' at Eddie, mostly because I want to believe they are not that stupid. They're playing a dangerous game and are currently toying a very thin line here. We know they don't have plans to have Buddie happen, but if they actively start baiting their audience, it will look extremely bad on them.

My inbox is open for ranting, venting, or discussing! And if you wanna talk more things than 911, it is open for that as well!

Take care <3

*Disclaimer: not saying that you are being too negative or cynical. I 100% understand where you're coming from, especially after the way the show has dealt with all of this in the last few weeks. I see what you're saying and I partly agree with it.

[kiddphel]

THAT WAS A TRAP THEY LURED ME IN WITH 2 SESSIONS A WEEK AND PROMISES OF FUN TIMES SO THAT THEY COULD TELL ME F1N4L1TY'S PLAYER HAS TO DIP OUT OF THE GAME FOR AWHILE CUZ XYR TOO BUSY ATM

[mimiatmidnight]

Will you be commenting on the Taylor drama?

I love the way this was worded, like I'm one of the siblings on Succession and the press has cornered me outside my penthouse to ask if I'll be releasing a statement on my family's latest scandal. Hehehe anyways.

Sorry but I just don't understand how anyone is shocked. Truly what has that woman ever done to successfully convince people that this is out of character for her. Like I don't want to diminish anyone's pain or anything but I see all these stans on here and over on Twitter in all this distress, having their very first epiphanies like "Hold on . . . does Taylor . . . suck??" And I kinda just have to chuckle at them cause like bless your hearts babes, but omg catch UP 😭

Lol because 1) she is a severely emotionally stunted person who thinks edgy British "bad boys" are hot like she's 12 years old, 2) she has no true deeply-held moral principles outside of issues that directly affect herself, and 3) truthfully, she seems to be suffering from a serious crisis of identity after the end of the longest and most significant romantic relationship of her life, and in my opinion is pretty clearly desperate to prove something to the world/her ex/herself.

The first reason is cringe but not news to longtime viewers, the second reason is pathetic but also not news (to those who can be honest with themselves), and the third is . . . understandable in some sense, but not pitiable enough to make me willing to humor this insufferable little episode she's having. I wish her luck on this humiliating rebound journey, but she is gonna have to walk that road on her own.

Normally, I always roll my eyes when people make these kinds of jokes, but given the circumstances I feel justified in saying: I can't wait to hear the breakup song about him, sis 🤡

[goldfades]

𝐀 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐒 ─ PB⁵

౨ৎ ─ summary | request -> "paige x iowa!reader (pre-relationship) on game day where maybe r is mic'd up the whole time so fans hear how they flirt, joke around, etc so they start shipping them? the other uconn/iowa girlies always tease them abt it and one night they all go out to a bar tg and someones on live and accidentally catches p and r against a wall kissing or smthn 🫣" for my lovely disco nonnie!

─ word count | 2.6k

─ warnings | teasing, lots and LOTS of teasing, mention of injuries, so much flirting, teasing, slightly suggestive, kissing.... oh and did i mention teasing????

─ taglist | guys idk why my taglist isn't working pls help me and lmk

─ ev's notes | okay so i want to know if yall like the little comment section i put in some of the posts, because i love doing them and i wanna know what ur thoughts are.

"OKAY, HEY LADIES and gents. It's your favorite, me. Y/N L/N," you tried to whisper into the mic secretively as you looked around. Before you could continue talking, you felt Caitlin grab your shoulders and shake you, eliciting a yelp from you.

You sent her a glare as she giggled and walked away, causing you to roll your eyes. "Anyways, sorry for that stupid interruption. It's game day here at Iowa and we're going against... I don't even remember their names."

You were obviously joking, you had plenty of friends on the UConn basketball team and it was running joke that you didn't like them. You smirked into the camera, knowing full well that your faux ignorance would rile up some competition.

"But hey, who needs names when we've got game, am I right?" You grinned, your enthusiasm showing. "So, while we prepare to show those other guys what real basketball looks like, let's talk strategy."

Leaning in closer to the microphone, you adopted a more serious tone, though the mischievous glint in your eye remained. "First off, we gotta dominate the boards. Rebounds win games, folks. Then, we'll run those fast breaks like there's no tomorrow. Speed kills, baby."

You paused for dramatic effect, pretending to adjust an imaginary headset. "And of course, let's not forget about defense. Lock 'em down, make 'em work for every shot. That's how we do it here at Iowa."

You turned around to see some of your teammates giggling at you, causing you to roll your eyes. "I'm getting bullied again, guys. Remember amazing, hot and very cool players have feelings too, okay?"

"Can you shut the hell up and come stretch with us?" You heard Caitlin shout from the court, causing you to sigh dramatically.

With a playful wink at the camera, you turned away, joining your teammates on the court for the pre-game warm-up. As you stretched and bantered with them, you saw the opponents walk in. You couldn't help but bit your lower lip as you averted your gaze from a particular blonde whom you've gotten close to these last couple of months.

After last year's game, Paige followed you on Instagram and you began talking more. However when you two got injured around the same time, it caused you two to talk more and form a closer bond. Eventually, it turned into Paige texting and calling you every single day and now, it's like you two have known each other your entire lives despite you guys seeing each other face to face three times.

You couldn't help but steal glances at her as you stretched, a small smile playing on your lips whenever your eyes met. The familiar banter and teasing between your teams seemed to fade into the background as you found yourself drawn to her presence.

But amidst the closeness, there lingered an unspoken tension ─ a delicate balance between friendship and something more. You couldn't deny the flutter in your stomach whenever Paige's eyes met yours, or the way your heart raced whenever she flashed you a smile.

Caitlin's voice broke through your thoughts, snapping you back to reality. "Yo, Y/N! Focus up, we've got a game to win!"

"Oh my gosh, look it's serious Caitlin I'm so scared," you spoke into the mic quietly, hoping that she wouldn't hear you. Unfortunately, she did and she got up, holding up her hand as you put your hands over your head. "No, I'm sorry!"

Caitlin laughed at your antics, her laughter infectious as she waved off your dramatic apology. "You're lucky I'm in a good mood today, Y/N," she teased, giving you a playful shove before turning back to the team. "But seriously, let's focus up. We've got a game to win, and I don't plan on losing to those guys."

"Yeah, me neither." She helped you get up from the floor as you walked to the bench. "Thanks, Cait," you said with a grin, falling into step beside her as you made your way to the bench.

As you settled onto the bench, you took a moment to mentally prepare yourself for the game ahead. The familiar sounds of sneakers squeaking on the hardwood, the echoing noise of the crowd, and the anticipation building in the air all served to fuel your determination.

You rose to your feet, eyes fixed on the court ahead. With a quick glance at the UConn's lineup, you immediately spotted Paige among their starting players. Your heart rate quickened slightly as you realized the task at hand — you needed to guard Paige and shut down her scoring opportunities.

In any other situation, it would be easy. Even if the person you were guarding was someone you were friends with, you always made sure to stay professional but this was slightly different. Paige had been the theoretical shoulder you'd been crying on for the last year about your injury that you'd just healed from.

As you stepped onto the court, Caitlin's words from earlier echoed in your mind. You couldn't afford to let Paige get the better of you, not today. You made your way toward Paige and as she met your eyes, she gave you a small smile. You could still talk to her, right? She held out her hand for a quick dap-up and you accepted it gratefully.

"Bro, me and Nika were just talking about how your hair is probably gonna be perfect. You have the best game day hair," Paige spoke finally as you laughed nervously, your gaze momentarily averting to the floor then back to her.

You felt yourself blush under her gaze as you playfully brushed off the compliment. "Oh, you think so, huh?" you smiled, trying to keep the mood light despite the butterflies fluttering in your stomach. "Well, what can I say? Gotta look good for the cameras,"

Paige smirked in response. "Oh, trust me, you always do," she teased, her words laced with a playful flirtation that made your heart skip a beat.

You looked into Paige's eyes, you couldn't shake the feeling of warmth that washed over you. There was something about her presence, her easy smile, that made you feel at ease, even in the midst of a game.

"Says you, with your cute braids. You gotta teach me how to do those one day, you know." You playfully nudged Paige's shoulder, a smile spreading across your face."Now you're just showing off," you teased, your tone light and playful as you admired the braids that framed Paige's face.

Paige chuckled, a soft sound that sent a shiver down your spine. "Or I can just do them for you once you actually visit Connecticut, like you promised."

You just realized that you were mic'd up, as you glanced down at the mic. You laughed nervously, shaking your head. "Alright, alright, you've got yourself a deal," you replied with a playful wink.

You then felt Kate's hand tap on your shoulder, motioning for you to come to the bench with her. Paige gave you a small smile as she did the same, your heart fluttering at the sight of her smile. With one last glance at Paige, filled with a mixture of excitement and anticipation, you followed Kate to the bench.

"Are you gonna lock in, Y/N?" Caitlin's voice rang out as you glanced up at the tall brunette. You saw the slight smirk on her lips as she gazed at you, teasing you without saying anything. She was practically screaming "you're whipped!" as she did.

"Yeah, I'm locked in," you responded as you averted your gaze, laughter echoing in between your teammates as a blush covered your cheeks.

"You know, cus if you're not, I can guard Paige while you go shoot-"

"Oh shut up, Caitlin I hate you." You groaned, causing her to laugh along with the rest of the team. Caitlin's teasing banter was a familiar part of the pre-game ritual, and despite your protest, you couldn't help but smile at her antics.

"Hey, just looking out for you, Y/N," she teased, her tone lighthearted as she flashed you a grin.

As the referee's whistle blew, signaling the start of the game, you shook off any lingering distractions and locked into the moment. This was it the moment you had been waiting for. With a deep breath, you blocked out the noise of the crowd and zeroed in on the game plan.

At one point, as you and Paige push for position under the basket, you couldn't help but let out a laugh as Paige jokingly accused you of stealing her post moves. "Hey, imitation is a form of flattery, right?" you quipped, earning a playful shove from Paige in response.

But perhaps the most memorable moment came when you and Paige found yourselves face-to-face during a heated confrontation for the ball. With the game hanging in the balance, you couldn't help but exchange a playful smirk with Paige, feeling a slight warmth on your cheeks.

Iowa had ultimately won the game but there was no bad blood between the two teams (thankfully), players from both teams exchanged handshakes and congratulatory words, acknowledging the hard-fought battle that had unfolded on the court.

Sure, some of the players were a little hurt but it wasn't like it was the end of the world. However, you knew at some point the two teams would have to play against each other during play-offs but you didn't let yourself get too worried right now. Right now, it was important to savor the moment, to celebrate the hard-fought victory with your teammates and bask in the camaraderie of the game.

──

"You looked good," Paige spoke as she leaned against the wall of the bar. Some of the girls on the team wanted to go out and celebrate and the UConn girls wanted to join. And that was how you found yourself standing next to Paige, a little tipsy as you leaned against the wall beside her, a warm flush spreading across your cheeks at her compliment.

"Thanks, you too," you replied, unable to hide the smile that tugged at the corners of your lips. You felt yourself shy away from her gaze, a stark contrast to how you usually were ─ teasing and outgoing.

Paige noticed that quickly, a small smirk appearing on her lips as she took a tip of her drink. "Aw, look at you, all flustered," she teased, her tone light and teasing as she nudged your shoulder gently.

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up," you replied, rolling your eyes in mock exasperation. "Gotta stay humble, right?"

Paige laughed, the sound sweet and infectious as she leaned closer to you. "Don't worry, I think you can handle it," she said with a smirk, her words sending a shiver down your spine.

She gazed at you for a little longer as you looked away, only for her to grab your chin and hold it so that you kept looking at her. With a soft chuckle, Paige leaned in closer, her breath warm against your ear as she whispered, "You're cute when you're flustered,"

"I never thought that you could be shy, you know... with all that shit-talking on and off the court." Paige remarked as she let go of your chin, her gaze still heavy on you. "It's kinda giving me an ego boost,"

"Oh shut up," you mumbled as you took a sip from your own drink, Paige's gaze following your lips. There was something about the way she looked at you, the way her eyes seemed to linger on your lips, that made your heart race.

As you lowered your drink, you met Paige's gaze once more, a playful glint in your eyes. "You're not so bad yourself, you know," you replied with a smirk.

Paige chuckled softly, the sound like music to your ears as she leaned in closer, the warmth of her breath sending a shiver down your spine. "Oh, I know," she teased, her voice low and teasing as she leaned back slightly, a playful twinkle in her eye.

She wasn't usually ever this cocky, sure she's had her moments but never to this extent ─ she didn't know if it was the alcohol or just you. There was something about her self-assured demeanor that was both enticing and captivating, drawing you in with each exchanged word and shared laugh.

"Well, aren't you just full of yourself tonight?" you teased, a playful smirk tugging at the corners of your lips as you leaned in closer to her.

"Can you blame me?" Paige replied with a grin, her confidence unwavering as she met your gaze. "I mean, if you had a pretty girl getting flustered over every word you say, even after her beat team yours, you'd be feeling pretty confident too," she continued, her playful tone tinged with a hint of desire as she leaned in closer, the warmth of her breath grazing your skin.

"Well, I guess I can't argue with that," you replied with a grin, your tone light and teasing as you leaned back slightly, a playful twinkle in your eye. "But just remember, I'm not one to stay flustered for long."

With a playful smile, she leaned in closer to you. "Well, lucky for you, I happen to enjoy a challenge."

Her eyes kept flickering down to your lips as she downed her drink, putting it down on the table next to you. She leaned in closer, as if to test the water, grazing her lips against yours as your breath hitched.

She took your reaction as a yes, her hands finding your hips as she pushed you against the wall. She pushed her lips into yours in a hurried kiss, the intensity of her touch sending a jolt of electricity coursing through you.

You responded eagerly, your hands finding their way to her shoulders as you pulled her closer, the world around you fading away as you lost yourself in the moment. With a sense of urgency, Paige deepened the kiss, her hands exploring the contours of your body with hunger.

The taste of her lips was intoxicating, a heady mix of alcohol and longing that left you breathless. You forgot all about your teammates and who might see this and recognize the two of you, because neither of you really cared anymore.

Jada drank her water as she kept skimming through the comments of the live, reading them and chuckling at every remark toward you and Paige. Kate was behind her, momentarily blocking from everyone seeing what you two were currently up to.

Kate heard someone call her name as she quickly got up from her spot, turning to respond to the voice. As she moved away, the brief obstruction she provided from prying eyes was gone, leaving you and Paige momentarily exposed.

As Jada's gaze flickered to the screen, she froze, her eyes widening in surprise at the unexpected sight before her. "Oh shit- I mean, shoot." She quickly moved her phone as she glanced at the sight, giving the camera a shocked look as she thought about what she should do.

She had basically just outed the two of you but to be completely fair, it was on you two for making out in a very public bar. "Guys, don't worry that wasn't Paige that was just some other blonde. Sorry guys, you know how Y/N has a thing for blondes."

She sighed as she locked eyes with Kate, who gave her a shocked expression as she looked down at her phone. Kate gave her a look before Jada looked down at her phone, laughing as she waved.

"Looks like we are gonna have to end the live, sorry guys. Love you, bye, mwah mwah."

Paige finally broke the kiss, leaving the both of you to catch your breath. She smiled as her finger swiped your bottom lip, tracing the outline of it gently. You couldn't help but catch your breath, the taste of her lingering on your lips like a sweet memory.

"You're fucking beautiful," she whispered, her voice barely above a murmur as she leaned in to place a soft kiss on your lips again.

↳ make sure to check out my navigation or masterlist if you enjoyed! any interaction is greatly appreciated !

↳ thank you for reading all the way through, as always ♡

[shinestarhwaa]

DADDY DEAREST || CHOI SAN

Genre: Smut

Pairing: San x Fem reader

Word Count: 2.2K

Tags/Warnings: Dilf!San (aged 40), reader is 21 years old, forbidden love kinda, ceo!San, student!reader, daddy kink, unprotected sex, fingering, cunnilingus, blow job, praise kink, dirty talk, daddy kink, filming sex, jerking off

I've had this in my drafts for months and finally it's coming to life y'all

Taglist: @anyamaris @a-soft-hornytiny @whatudowhennooneseesyou @wooyoungmybelovedhusband @pyeonghongrie-main @woosanbby @dreamlesswonder86 @changbinslovelylegs @jonghostie @lovjensoo @mjyungi @bratty-tingz @sugarnspice630 @stardragongalaxy @bro-atz @wisejudgedragonhairdo @mingisg00dgirl @vesvosmozhno @therealcuppicake @unholywriters @enbymingi @jjoongstar

ENJOY!

You had been eyeing him from across the bar for hours, but he just wouldn't look your way. "Just go up to him," your friend said, "go up to him and flirt with him!" "But what if he's a creep?" "Just send your location if you're going somewhere with him," your friend said before pushing you into the direction of the handsome man sitting at the bar.

Taking a deep breath, you strutted towards him, your stiletto heels clicking on the wooden floor as you did so. You took place on the blue velvet stool next to him and flashed the man a smile, batting your long eyelashes at him. You could tell by the expression on his face he was immediately intrigued by your presence.

"Hi there," he said, turning towards you, "what's a lovely lady like you doing here alone?" You grinned and ordered a martini, tossing your hair back over your shoulder. "Oh, I'm not alone, my friends are in the back." "Ah," the man smiled and gave you a nod. You licked your lips before speaking again. "But I came here to the bar by myself 'cause you looked rather lonely and I figured you must like having some company," you smiled, drinking from the cocktail in your hand. He grinned and turned his body to yours.

''Well, I didn't have anything to do or anyone to come home to so... I figured I'd have a drink here.'' Your ears perked up and you took another sip of your martini. ''No one to come home to, you say?'' You spoke to him with a pout on your rosy lips, your hand gently resting on his. Your fingers traced the veins on the man's hand and you noticed him swallowing thickly.

''That's right... No one to come home to. What about you? You're here to find someone or are you out with your friends because you're tired of your boyfriend?'' he grinned. You laughed and shook your head. ''No, my boyfriend's an ass so I dumped him this morning. That's what he deserves for dipping his pen in the company ink if you know what I mean,'' you sighed. ''Oh, so you're here to look for a rebound, I get it,'' he smirks. ''I'm San, by the way.'' ''Nice to meet you San, I'm Y/N,'' you said, batting your eyes at him.

This flirting game wasn't new to you. You knew just what to do to make a guy weak but you've never tried an older man before. But after the shit boys your age put you through you're over it, you are ready for someone older. And San looked like the perfect guy for it.

You sat and talked with San for nearly the entire night. You found out he's double your age and he's a CEO of a big skincare company. He laughed loudly when you told him you couldn't live without the brand. ''Well what if I'd give you products for free?'' he grinned. ''Oh, you would?'' ''Well, you're too pretty to say no to.'' ''So you'll say yes to whatever I ask of you?'' He smiled and rolled his eyes, his hand landing on your exposed knee. ''Probably. I'm a sucker for those eyes of yours, cannot take my own of them.''

''So, if I ask you to take me home tonight...'' ''I would in a heartbeat, my darling.'' You smirked as his fingers traveled up your thigh. ''You'd treat me better than my stupid ex-boyfriends, wouldn't you?'' ''Oh baby I would, you have no idea.'' You smirked and took his hand in yours. ''Then take me home and show me.''

Only 15 minutes later you signed to your friends you'd be leaving and you made your way to his huge luxury apartment nearby. You couldn't believe your eyes when you got in, seeing the gorgeous interior San had. Before you could say anything his lips were on yours.

San's lips were so soft and they moved skillfully. He wasn't sloppy or too harsh but perfect. This is what you needed; a man who knew what he was doing. All your ex lovers were just doing whatever, not really caring about your pleasure, but San was seemingly different.

His hands roamed your body and zipped down your dress, which fell down to pool at your ankles. You were left in the lacy lingerie set you put on earlier that night and you noticed the way San stared at you after breaking your kiss.

Your hands worked on his white shirt, unbuttoning it as fast as you could while you were stumbling through the hall, on the way to his bedroom. You nearly tore his shirt off and San took off his belt in the process, the metal buckle clashing against the floor tiles. It was a struggle to move through the apartment while keeping on stealing kisses.

Finally when you got to the bedroom he took off his pants and laid down on the large bed. You smirked and laid on top of him, connecting your lips together once more.

San's hands roamed your ass and squeezed it every now and then, while his tongue explored your mouth. Your hands ran across his toned chest and arms and his chiseled abs. He was absolutely to die for, looking like a Greek God in his 40s.

You started to grind your crotch against his, awakening the cock that was still hid by his underwear. He moaned into your mouth and fidgeted with your bra-clasp before undoing it and throwing it to the other side of the room. You sat up and threw your hair back, licking your lips while looking into his eyes seductively.

"God, baby girl you have no idea what you're doing to me," he grunted as you moved your crotch over his once again. His hands traveled from your waist up to your breasts to cup them. "You're perfect," he breathed out, starting to massage your boobs. "You should come closer so I can have them in my mouth."

A smirk played on your lips as you did so, crawling above him until your breasts reached his face. He started to lick and suck on them while his dominant hand found your clothed pussy. He started to rub your folds through your panties, feeling the fabric getting wet at his touch.

You whimpered above him, clenching your needy pussy around nothing. "You're so wet for me," San said before circling your nipples with his tongue. "Yes, daddy, for you," you moaned. The older man laid you down and took off your wet panties.

Immediately you spread your legs for him, awakening a hungry look in his eyes. San laid between your legs and slid his fingers through your wet folds, moaning at the feeling. "Bet you've missed looking at a young, tight pussy like mine," you teased him with a breathy laugh. "Oh, I sure did. Look at this perfect wet pussy," he grunted, licking a stripe up from your hole to your clit, "Perfectly wet for me, ready to be abused."

You let out another whimper as he kept lapping at your pussy. Your hands ran through his raven hair and you pushed his face deeper into your cunt. San's tongue found your entrance and slid his tongue in and out before circling your clit again. He lapped and sucked on your cunt, savouring all the arousal spilling out of you. Your hands fondled and massaged your own breasts.

He focussed on your clit, circling it with his tongue and sucking on it, earning a row of high pitched moans from you. He made you feel sensations you hadn't felt for a long time now and you wanted it to go on and on forever. Your legs locked his body between them, face pushed deep into your soaking heat.

San pushed 2 of his thick fingers into your cunt, pumping them in and out of your hole as his tongue was still flicking against your sensitive clit. It didn't take long before San found a sensitive spot inside you, noticing your reaction to it immediately. Naturally he started to abuse it, hitting it repeatedly as he sucked on your clit.

He didn't pressure you to cum fast, like many other lovers had. San focussed on pleasuring you, not caring how long he had to keep lapping at your clit.

But soon enough you felt a coiling desire for release in your abdomen, your moans growing louder. "D-daddy, daddy I'm coming, c-coming for you," you panted out before releasing and coming undone on his fingers and tongue.

You panted softly before sitting up and pinning the older man down on the bed. Stripped from his clothes he looked beautiful in all his naked glory. His cock was beautiful and large and so thick it made your mouth water at the sight.

You lowered your head into his lap and pressed kisses along his thick shaft before giving the head of his cock soft kitten licks. He groaned softly and you felt your entire body react to it immediately, pussy clenching around nothing. His reactions to you taking him into your mouth made you more eager than ever. You started to bob your head up and down calmly, sucking his hard cock. He grunted beneath you, his breathing getting louder and his eyes rolling back into his head.

''Darling, please-” He moaned as he felt himself hit the back of your throat. You tasted his pre-cum on your tongue and you could tell how close he was lo cumming down your throat. Quickly he pulled you off his cock and watched your face pout in disappointment.

“Don’t want to cum in your pretty mouth while I could also cum in that tight young pussy of yours... Need to fuck you right now angel.”

He pulled you on top of him and you held onto his broad shoulders. Soon enough you sank down on his hardness and you could feel San stretching your poor pussy out. You moaned loudly, looking down and seeing his cock disappear between your thighs.

''You're so pretty and warm babygirl, oh my God, so tight, bet you've never been fucked right,'' he grunted. ''N-No they've never fucked me right, God, I need you, need a real man like you,'' you moaned to butter him up and tease him even more.

''Bet your boyfriend wishes he was inside you right now. How did he make you feel Y/N? Did he fuck you as good as this? Like I can?'' he grunted while he fucked up into you, his hands groping your ass and thighs. ''N-No, fuck, his cock was too small, d-didn't feel anything, you make me feel everything, San, fuck me harder daddy, please!''

While San pounded into you from beneath he also took your phone. ''Unlock it. Let's make that bastard who hurt you jealous. Wanna make him miserable for wasting such a pretty girl's time.'' You unlocked your phone and handed it back over to San.

You leaned back, displaying your naked body while you moaned loudly. San started to film you getting your cunt pounded by him and you might've been acting a little extra pornographic for the video but San didn't mind. Even though he didn't know the guy he desperately wanted to claim you and make him lose his mind.

''That's right baby, take my cock, you're taking it so well, huh?'' ''Y-Yes daddy, fuck, love your cock so much, you're gonna make me cum!''

Right then he turned the camera off and tossed the phone onto the bed, fucking into you even harder. ''That small-dicked idiot will never get to see you cum again. You're just gonna cum on my cock now, won't you?''

''Yes, yes please I wanna cum on your cock, yes!'' you cried out. In a matter of a few thrusts you came undone on his thick cock. You moaned loudly and your body shook as the orgasm came over you. San pulled you off his cock and laid you down, hovering above you before fisting his own cock.

With a loud moan he spurted his cum over your abdomen, painting you white. ''Fuck, daddy,'' you moaned softly. ''That's my good girl,'' San smirked.

After the both of you came down from your highs he got a cold, moist towel and cleaned you up nicely before placing his blanket over you. You snuggled into it and closed your eyes, but whined when he got up. ''Stay with me,'' you mumbled softly, feeling sleepy but also cuddly.

San smiled and laid down. It conflicted with his morality, sure, sleeping with a 21-year old was already a bit over the line but actually sleeping and cuddling with one, wanting to date one... Was that okay?

Luckily you knocked those thoughts right out of his head when you laid on his chest, drifting off to sleep. He soon did the same, dreaming of eating your pussy the next morning when he'd wake up.

[cyarikaplease]

and i’ll never see you again if i can help it

ex!joel miller x f!reader

summary: after breaking up with Joel, you take an opposite patrol shift to avoid him at all costs.

warnings: smut and angst

“The first time I tasted somebody else's spit, I had a coughing fit

I mistakenly called them by your name

I was let down it wasn't the same”

The cold nighttime air startled your lungs as you stumbled outside. Before you had time to acclimate, his lips were pressed against yours. You drunkenly kissed him back, him being some guy you met at the Tipsy Bison whose name you couldn’t even be bothered to recall. You got a taste of his spit, bitter from the alcohol he just drank. You forced yourself not to gag which caused you to pull away and cough violently, the crisp November air certainly not helping. 

He looked at you under the dim street lamp and chuckled, “You okay?”

Tears sprung at the corners of your eyes as you continued your coughs and struggled to catch your breath. He rubbed your back as your coughing fit came to an end. 

That was nice of him.

When the coughing finally dissipated you resigned to kissing him again. He pressed you against the side of the building and worked on your neck, leaving sloppy, wet kisses on your soft skin.

You started to moan a little and as he kissed and sucked on your neck, you subconsciously moaned “Joel”. 

He stopped. You felt the blood rush to your cheeks and your face grew hot. He slowly pulled away from your neck and looked you in the eye. 

“…What did you just say?”

You didn’t know what to say. It’s not like you could tell him the truth, “Oh I was just moaning my ex’s name.” That would crush him. You stared at each other under the streetlamp and through puffs of your visible breath. The expression on his face was a mixture of disappointment and betrayal.

“I- I…” you stuttered out.

He shook his head and muttered “Forget it” before turning and walking home, leaving you alone in the dark street with nothing but the shame you felt. 

“I’m doing fine, trying to derail my one-track mind

Regaining my self-worth in record time

But I can’t help but think of your other in the bed that was mine”

You sighed and went to walk home yourself, the shame already melting away. It’s not like it was going to be anything serious anyway. Who cares if you called him by the wrong name? You’re still healing from your breakup with Joel anyway. You were bound to be a little messy here and there. The shame had started shapeshifting into pride of some kind. But all that changed when you saw him leaving the Tipsy Bison. And no, not the random guy from before. This time him being Joel. And he was with a woman. They were clearly drunk and practically hanging off of each other. How had you not noticed him inside earlier? And as they walked towards the direction of Joel’s home, the home that you used to share with him, you heard something rare; Joel was laughing. Jealousy stirred a pit in your stomach. Your hands clenched at your sides. Tears sprung in your eyes again. The shame returned but this time for a different reason. You were ashamed you no longer had a rebound. You wanted to prove to Joel that you didn’t need him; that you were moving on. But instead, you were standing in the street feeling jealous, watching him walk home to fuck someone where he used to fuck you. 

“Am I a masochist, resisting urges to punch you in the teeth

Call you a bitch and leave?”

You wanted to yell after him; tell him to stop; ask what he thought he was doing. Maybe even call him a name or two. Maybe throw him a punch. Maybe not the punch though. That was just drunk you talking. You didn’t really have a right to do any of those things anyway. You were broken up. He was free to move on to whoever he wanted. You turned on your heel and walked home, head hanging low in humiliation. You returned to your empty home, collapsing into bed and finally letting the tears flow now that you were alone. You thought about what Joel was doing with her. Was he kissing her? Were they holding each other? Were they in what used to be your bed with Joel? Did he have the same attention to detail with her pleasure that he used to have with yours? It made your stomach twist into knots. The alcohol mixed with the feelings of regret, longing, and nostalgia; all of it fusing together, leaving you nauseous. You ran to your bathroom and emptied the contents of your stomach into the toilet. You sat on the floor, rested your head against the toilet seat, and sobbed, the tears making your face sticky and puffy. You knew you were gonna look like shit tomorrow, eyes puffy and bloodshot, all the color in your face faded. And to make matters worse, you had a daytime patrol shift with Joel tomorrow. The thought of him seeing you like this was mortifying. You wanted him to think that you were moving on; that you didn’t need him anymore. But that was far from the truth. 

“Why did I come here? To sit and watch you stare at your feet? 

What was the plan? Absolve all your guilt and shake hands?”

You woke up that morning with a splitting headache. The morning sun creeping in through the windows didn’t help either. You rose from your bed slowly, the aches in your body starting to set in. You went to the bathroom and took a look at yourself in the mirror. The bags under your eyes were a deep purple and the life was sucked from your face. You thought about Joel seeing you like this… which led you to think about him waking up with her this morning. The pain that that thought gave you was indescribable. It tore at your stomach and your heart, leaving them with heavy pits. You leaned over the bathroom counter and took slow, deep breaths, heading facing down at the sink. After talking yourself down from the impending mental breakdown you got ready for your patrol shift, slipping on your clothes and grabbing your gun on the dresser before exiting into the brisk morning. You put your pants in the pockets of your jacket and stared at the ground as you walked, not trying to make eye contact with anyone as Jackson was waking up for the day. 

You reached the main gate to find Joel waiting there, too, also looking at the ground. Tommy and a few others were waiting as well. You wordlessly headed to the stables, mounting on your houses for the patrol. The tension between the group hung heavy in the air, thanks to you and Joel. Everyone in town knew about your breakup and how messy it was. Nobody dared to say a thing as you and the group exited through the gate and spread out along the walls of Jackson. Somehow you and Joel ended up next to each other, neither of you looking in the other’s general direction. The strain and hostility between you two was so strong it was pliable. It felt like a weight being pushed down on your shoulders. And that’s how most of the shift went– you and Joel next to each other or walking by each other on your horses, never making eye contact. It was awkward for you, him, and everyone else unfortunate enough to be on the same patrol shift with you guys. If only you could switch patrol shifts…

But your thoughts are interrupted when Joel speaks, startling you. 

“Can we talk?”

Really? Now?

“I don’t really think here is the best time or place…” you said, glancing at the others around you.

“Meet me at the diner after our shift?” he asked in a hushed tone. 

The diner in Jackson had a service for patrol shift workers to stop in for coffee whenever they needed it. Going to the diner after your patrol shifts was something you used to do together. Now, you avoided that place like the plague, finding it to be painful to go to. 

Your brow furrowed, “Sure, I guess…”

He nodded silently and led his horse in the opposite direction around the fence. You didn’t see him much for the rest of your shift. And when you did you didn’t really look him in the eye. The day seemed to drag on, the sun getting lower and lower in the sky. At the end of your shift, you headed back to the stables and dismounted from your horse, starting the walk to the diner. Jackson was bathed in a warm red glow, a beautiful sight on a normal day but you were too nervous to appreciate it. As you approached the diner you saw Joel through the window, sitting at a booth, looking down at his hands.

“I feel no need to forgive but I might as well

But let me kiss your lips so I know how it felt

Pay for my coffee and leave before the sun goes down

Walk for hours in the dark feeling all hell”

You entered the diner with a ding from the bell attached to the door. Joel looked up from his hands and met your eyes. You wordlessly walked to his booth and sat across from him, not knowing what to say. But again, Joel spoke first.

“I’m sorry you had to see that outside the Tipsy Bison last night…”

So he did see you. That made this so much worse.

You sighed, “You don’t have anything to apologize for. We’ve been broken up for like a month now.”

“I know but that doesn’t mean I don’t care for you or your feelings anymore…”

He looked at you with a solemn expression on his face. Before either of you could say anything the waitress came over to take your order. 

“Can I get you two anything else besides coffee? Something to eat?”

Not in the mood to eat. Not during a talk like this. 

“Just the coffee for now,” you replied. 

“Same for me.”

“I’ll be right back with those,” she said before, turning and heading behind the counter. 

“I mean… I forgive you I guess?”

He nodded and reached your hand across the table.

But why? Why is he doing this if he supposedly moved on? You missed him, though. And you’d be lying to yourself right now if this didn’t make you at least a little bit happy. 

You took his hand and sighed, rubbing your thumb across his. 

“Why are we doing this? I thought we were supposed to be moving on. I’ve been trying to, at least.” It physically pained you to say those words but it was what needed to be said. He can’t just go home with another woman and then come back to you apologizing. He either wanted you or he didn’t.

He didn’t answer. The waitress returned with your coffees and you sipped on them silently; the warm liquid soothing you after a long day out in the cold.

You continued, “I just don’t get what’s going on here. It all feels like a mixed signal.”

“I want to move on. I really do. But when I try to move on I find myself feelin’ guilty. And it doesn’t help that we work the same patrol shift. I see you all the time and anytime I look at you, I just feel guilty.”

“I’ll make this easier for both of us, Joel,” you said, giving him a sad smile. “Don’t worry about me. Just live your life.”

Something compelled you to give him one final kiss before it was over forever. You leaned over the booth and gave him a quick, chaste kiss, even though you would regret it later. Before he could say anything in return, you slid out of the booth and stood up, getting ready to leave. 

“Goodbye, Joel,” you said before leaving him behind, in the past where he belongs. 

“Don’t hold your breath, forget you’ve ever saw me at my best

You don’t deserve what you don’t respect

Don’t deserve what you say you love and then neglect

Now bite your tongue, it’s too dangerous to fall so young

Take back what you said

Can’t lose what you never had”

The sun was setting. The people of Jackson were heading towards their homes, but not you. You walked through the dark streets, in a melancholy haze. You missed him so much but there was a reason your relationship ended. But still, you found yourself reminiscing on the good times; the patrol shifts together, him teaching you how to play guitar, laughing together with Ellie. But he didn’t love you the way you needed to be loved. It was understandable given all he went through. But he didn’t need to tell you he loved you and treat you otherwise. 

You met each other in Kansas City after FEDRA’s control there collapsed. 

And when you first got together he would always tell you to be careful falling for him. You were a lot younger than him. Looking back, he was probably right. But he stopped trying to fight your feelings towards him and just accepted it. And that’s all it most likely was at the end of the day; him just accepting you, not loving you back. At least that’s what you thought. Maybe there was a part of grumpy, stoic Joel Miller that loved you deep down. And if that part of him existed, he was terrible at letting it out. 

It wasn’t a breakup where one person broke up with the other. You both felt it coming for a while. The greatest love you’d ever known (or thought you’d ever known) slipped through your fingers. And you both felt it was time to cut it off. That was a little over a month ago and it hasn’t been any easier since.

After a while the frigid night turned into dawn. You stayed out the whole night, loafing around. Soon it would be time for your patrol shift but you thought about what Joel said.

“And it doesn’t help that we work the same patrol shift. I see you all the time and anytime I look at you, I just feel guilty.”

“You got a 9 to 5, so I’ll take the night shift

And I’ll never see you again if I can help it

In five years I hope the songs feel like covers

Dedicated to new lovers”

You spotted Tommy walking to his patrol shift and that’s when you got the idea: ask for the night shift.

“Tommy!” you shouted, “Wait up!”

He stopped walking and turned to face you. You jogged a little bit to catch up with him.

“Hey,” he said wearily, taking in your current state. “Did you go to bed last night?”

“No… But I actually had something I wanted to ask you.”

“Shoot.”

“Would it be alright if I took the night shift instead?”

He let out a small sigh. He knew what this was about. 

“…I don’t see why not.”

“Thanks. Can I start tonight?”

“Yeah, that’s fine. Go home and get some sleep,” he said, looking at your tired face.

“Thanks, Tommy,” you replied before walking home.

You didn’t see Joel walk to his shift. Maybe he was already there. Maybe he would notice your absence. Maybe he wouldn’t care. Maybe he would be relieved. 

You walked inside and went straight to your bedroom, peeling off the clothes you had been wearing for the past twenty four hours. You slipped on something to wear to sleep and crumpled into bed, exhaustion taking you over. You still found yourself dreaming of Joel. You dreamt of when he taught you to play guitar. He knew some songs from before the outbreak but not a ton. So a lot of the songs you made up on the spot, not necessarily accompanied by singing either, something neither of you were skilled at. But it was something you two did together. It was something that made the detached Joel Miller enjoy himself for once. Maybe one day he would play those songs for someone else or forget yours and make up new ones entirely. Maybe he would teach her how to play guitar. Maybe he would give up that hobby altogether after you, finding it too painful. 

You slept throughout the whole day, waking up a couple of hours before your night shift. You opened your eyes groggily, not adjusted to the light coming in through the windows yet. You rubbed your eyes and opened them to see a tall, looming figure standing over your bed.

“What the fuck?!” you shouted, sitting upright. 

You blinked a few times and your vision focused. It was just Joel and he had a scowl on his face.

“Jesus Christ, Joel. You scared the shit out of me,” you said in an annoyed tone, trying to quell your racing heartbeat.

“The fuckin’ night shift?!” he said gruffly, still towering over you. 

“And what about it?” you challenged, folding your arms. 

“What was the fuckin’ reason for it,” he replied, sitting across from you on the bed.

“Thought about what you said yesterday… Seemed like the right thing to do if we’re gonna move on from each other…”

He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Yeah, but you don’t go and do something rash like that.”

“Something rash? You mean just swapping my work schedule? Last time I checked I didn’t have to consult with you about that.”

He fell silent so you continued, “You can’t just say you’re done with me; that you’re trying to move on, and then come here and get upset because I changed my work schedule. I’m sick of the fucking mixed signals, Joel. You either want me or you don’t.”

You finished your little speech with a loud sigh, sounding annoyed as fuck. The audacity of this man was unbelievable. He can take home some other woman the night before but come to your house, when you’re sleeping, and get all possessive? Enough was enough.

You scooched closer to him on the bed. 

“So what’s it gonna be, huh? Make up your fucking mind.”

Without warning his lips crashed against yours. His kisses were messy and sloppy. And almost angry. His hands found themselves in your hair. This was the exact opposite of what you should be doing but you didn’t care. You missed him so much. 

He pushed against you, coaxing you to lie down on the bed. And when you did, he hovered over you with a hungry, insatiable look in his eyes. He returned to kiss you messily while his hands roamed the rest of your body, trailing down to the pants you were wearing, thumbing at the waistband. You moaned softly underneath him and he pulled off your pants, tossing them on the floor. His hand grazed up your thigh, resting on your cunt that was growing wet in anticipation. 

“Bet you missed this,” he whispered against your ear. 

You let out a small whimper in response as his fingers teased your entrance, brushing against the wet, tender flesh. 

“You’re already so wet for me, darlin’.”

Darlin. That was an older pet name Joel had given you. And it’s been a while since you’ve heard it. That fucker knew exactly what he was doing. He knew all the ways to make you melt under his touch. 

You spread your legs open for him, gaining him access to slip a finger inside you. His mouth found your neck, peppering it with sloppy kisses. You rocked your hips against his hand, desperate for more. And when he finally gave you another finger, you felt the pleasure in your core building more and more. 

His mouth left your neck and trailed down to your entrance, licking small, soft circles around your sensitive clit. You knew you weren’t gonna last long like this, his fingers hitting your g-spot perfectly and his tongue caressing your clit in a way that sent you into intense euphoria. He always knew how to get you cum quickly and hard. 

“I’m gonna cum, Joel,” you whined. 

He moaned against your clit in response, letting you know he wanted to feel it. And when you did cum, it was intense. Your cunt fluttered around his fingers as he pumped them in and out of you relentlessly. You soaked his face in your cum as you rode out your high, rocking your hips against him. Once you were done coming, you collapsed your hips back down on the bed, legs still shaking. 

You were catching your breath when he looked up from your cunt and said “Not done with you yet, darlin’.”

He stood up from the bed for a moment to remove his clothes. You took the moment to sit up and pull off your shirt over your head, tossing it on the floor with your pants. He returned to the bed and hovered over you by your face. 

“Ready for me?”

You nodded and he aligned himself with your entrance, thrusting his hard cock into you extra slow to drive you insane. He took your legs and put them over his shoulders before you even had time to adjust to his size. It’d been a month since you’d taken his cock and you weren’t used to his size anymore. 

He leaned down so you were face to face, legs pushed back towards your head hitting the perfect angle inside you. It was intense and all you could do was moan and whimper as he fucked your wet, little cunt incessantly.

“Can’t tell you how much I missed this perfect cunt, darlin’. It’s like it was made for me.”

Between his dirty talk and the angle he was hitting inside you, you weren't gonna last long. You felt your walls tense up in anticipation of release. He sensed it too and thrusted in and out of you harder and harder, anxious to feel you cum around his cock.

“Give it to me, sugar. Cum on my cock.”

And when you did, it nearly sent him over the edge. He willed himself to wait until your release was over before pulling out. Stars prickled your vision and tears welled up in the corner of your eyes. Your release was intense, convulsing his cock like a vice. As he felt your orgasm come to an end, he pulled out. You reached in between your legs and stroked him to completion, coating your stomach in thick, white ropes of cum.

He slumped down on the bed next to you, burying his face in the crook of your neck. Neither of you dared to say a word as the feeling of regret started to sink in. You let your thoughts run wild as if to avoid talking about what just happened.

“You got a 9 to 5 so I’ll take the night shift

And I’ll never see you again if I can help it”

Maybe you couldn’t help it after all.

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

It's a Match! || poly!141 x Reader

[Chapter 30] || [Chapter 32]

Pairing: Soap x gn!Reader || Gaz x gn!Reader || 141 x gn!Reader Words: 1.4K~ cw: love confessions. Summary: While overcoming recent heartbreak, you decide to join Tinder in search of a rebound. Your friends advise to just Swipe Right indiscriminately... What happens when 4 soldiers from the same squad match with you? a/n: Another cute one for the books, y'all.

Chapter 31: Uh-Oh.

Gaz came home early.

Some stuff in his mission that was, according to John 'above his paygrade'.

He wasn't particularly happy about it, mentioned to Johnny over the phone how it was 'bullshit', that it wasn't fair he didn't get to know.

Not that you'd know. Johnny knew. But you sure as hell didn't.

Because, as usual, you got home from work on Tuesday, and there was a wild Kyle Garrick in your apartment, sat shoulder-to-shoulder, knee-to-knee with Johnny on the sofa.

"Hi?" You greeted once you passed the door, carrying a couple bags of goods from the shop.

"Hi, bonnie!" Johnny greeted. "Look who's here!" He gestured at Kyle with grandeur.

"Hi, love!" Kyle greeted, all smiley and beautiful as only he can be.

"Are you okay? Did you get hurt again? Dear God, tell me you didn't get hurt!" You began to say immediately, as he got up from the couch, rounding it to come greet you.

"You should've warned me you'd come, I would've bought more things to make dinner, now I'm not gonna have enough for you and-" You ranted.

He shut you up, however, by cradling your face in his hands and dropping a kiss onto your lips, causing you to hum and soften, your eyes closing.

It was a slow kiss, one that told you just how much he missed you, his thumbs caressing your cheeks on either side, his nose brushing your cheek as his warm lips and wet tongue carefully probed at your mouth.

When he pulled back, he smiled at you. "It's alright. I'm alright. Don't worry so much." He murmured, then, his hands slid down and grabbed one of the bags off you, helping you take the shopping to the kitchen.

Having a second man to play house with was somehow better and worse.

There was also less space. Another part of your closet or your drawers full of male clothes, extra counter space in the bathroom taken up by his skincare and cologne, extra bath products in the shower.

There were more snacks in your pantry, protein bars and shakes and the like, energy drinks, another seat at the dinner table taken up by another laptop and notebook and pen, another set of shoes to trip on at the entrance.

The flat was still always clean, and there was always someone to greet you once you got home, sometimes dinner would already be ready.

There was always someone to cuddle to or be cuddled by, someone rutting into you and stealing greedy kisses and groping handfuls of your body...

Nothing to complain about, not really.

On Saturday, you crawled away from Johnny's embrace, padding around the flat, seeking food and a drink.

Kyle was in the kitchen when you came in, shirtless as usual, one of your bath towels falling off his hip, his skin glistening. You've noticed you tend to find Kyle right out of the shower often.

"Morning, lovie..." He greeted you as you approached, kissing your forehead and wrapping an arm around your waist.

"Hi..." You murmured and leaned into him, setting your chin right on his shoulder, feeling a bit of the dampness of his skin, and smelling the scent of his body wash and shampoo. Coconut.

"How are you feeling?" He murmured as he glanced at you, brown eyes twinkling to the sight of what was, indubitably messy hair and a sleepy face.

Your body was deliciously sore, your jaw too, though that one was more uncomfortable. A consequence of a night well spent, pressed between the two of them... They were younger than John and Simon, had more stamina... they were more insatiable.

"Good..." You ended up saying with a chuckle, which earned you a smirk too.

"Good enough to wanna go out with me?" He asked you with a cocked brow.

"Out where?" You asked him, eyebrows raising in intrigue.

"I have plans for the two of us this afternoon... as long as you're not too tired for them." He explained.

"Not going to make me do something physical, are you?" You quipped, causing him to chuckle, your jaw trembling from the contact between his pec and you head.

"No... Not after last night. Need a chill day myself." He winked at you.

-

As it turns out, Johnny isn't the only artist in your little polycule. (Can you even call it that?)

At 2 P.M., you found yourself in a little pottery studio-café thing that Kyle had, apparently, scouted out in Birmingham, one of the times he went home.

It was not something you expected, finding yourself walking in hand in hand with him, fingers interlaced, being given a smock and being given a lump of clay, a wheel, and having a very eccentric but adorable lady guide you through the steps of making small pinch pots, and your final piece, a mug.

After over an hour of that, you were allowed to wash your hands off, your projects (a very wonky mug made by you, and a surprisingly good mug made by Kyle) going to be put in the kiln, with a promise from the pottery instructor that they'll come out in the next day or so and that everyone could come back to get them, if they so wished.

Then, you and Kyled moved to a little table in the painting station where you could grab a finished piece of your own, a standard one, that is, and paint it to your heart's content.

You sat beside Kyle after he went and got you both drinks and a little snack each, each one of you busy painting your little projects. You picked a small plate and Kyle picked a mug, just like the ones you had been trying (and failing, mind you) to throw beforehand.

You glanced over at Kyle who was extremely focused on what he was doing, using the tiniest brush you've ever seen to dot small petals on the flower design he had chosen for his mug.

"That looks really cute... Is that cherry blossom?" You asked as you set your chin on his arm, his left one, not the one he was using to paint.

"Mhm... My attempt at it, anyway." He replied as he glanced over at your plate. "Polka dots?" He asks with a playful smile on his lips, which causes you to shrug.

"I didn't know what I wanted to paint. Flowers are overdone... No offense-" You chuckled.

"None taken." He replied and winked at you before leaning over and grabbing his paper cup, sipping his tea through the opening on the lid.

"And everything else would be too difficult. I'm in the mood to just draw little dots all over." You remarked with another shrug.

"Well, I like your dots." He told you and, very slowly, tapped the tip of your nose with his forefinger.

You felt something wet and sticky on the tip of your nose and you knew, immediately, that he had just painted your nose. You didn't even notice him dipping his finger in his paint palette beforehand.

You grabbed your phone and used the locked screen as a mirror to spot the bright pink dot of paint on your skin.

Turning to your boyfriend, you squinted at him. "Kyle Garrick, do you want to start a war you will not win?" You murmured as you pointed your paintbrush at him like a teacher with a ruler.

"No, no, never." Kyle murmured, raising his hands in surrender, though he had the biggest grin on his lips, and a shine in his brown eyes.

"That's what I thought." You added before you turned away to resume your painting.

Kyle snickered next to you, resuming his own painting, slowly painting the front of his mug, while holding it from the back with the greatest care in the world.

Unfortunately for him, he was too focused to catch the way you dipped your thumb in your own paint pallette, gathering your brightest red... And then dabbing it on his cheek twice, forming a heart shape.

Kyle turned to you with wide eyes, catching the same shit-eating grin in your lips, your teeth showing, before you started giggling. "Uh-oh..." You said, not at all ashamed of the revenge you just got on him.

Kyle shook his head at you, a smile on his own lips, before he leaned over, caught your face by the chin, and dropped a kiss on your lips. You melted into it, eyes closing and smiling against his mouth.

And, when he pulled away, he looked you in the eyes with the fondest look in his eyes, his head dipped at an angle before he whispered a: "God, I love you... What am I going to do with you?"

taglist (CLOSED! not adding anyone else, sorry!):

@daisychainsinknots , @bunnysdaydreams , @iite-cool , @lahniu , @pagesfalling ,

@tapioca-milktea1978 , @live-love-be-unique , @thelaisydazy , @littleghosthunter , @bossva ,

@emotion-no-hot-yes-hotel-trivago , @chamomiletealeaf , @ghosts-hoe , @kariiiel , @ltbarnes ,

@irregulardongyoung , @spacelia , @hayleybarnesx , @cod-z , @frescoisnotinthemilitary ,

@leeeenistop , @lucienbarkbark , @xxshadowbabexx , @severenswife , @enarien,

@agoodmoviekiss , @l0lziez , @whos-fran , @greatstormcat , @openup-yourmind ,

@neoarchipelago , @sodavrr , @cutiecusp , @lilliumrorum , @c-nstantine ,

@kneelforloki , @comeonatmebruh , @codsunshine , @waiting-so-long , @captainquake42 ,

@gazspookiebear , @mynameismisty , @reap3erslov3 , @reaper-chan666 , @poohkie90 ,

@kitwithnokat , @stick-the-dumbass , @mothsdrabbles , @justanerd1 , @thesinsoflust ,

@thriving-n-jiving , @blckbrrybasket

[m0chis-cafe]

how i think ignihyde members would kiss you.. ⋆⑅˚₊

word count; 1.2k

warnings; nothing (orthos is a bit short just cause its platonic)

characters: Idia and Ortho (/p, kind of a continuation off of idas part)

Idia Shroud🎧

-this poor man..

-he does skin care dont get me wrong, hes not crusty by means, his lips are always dry though

-when he meets you he tries to take better care of himself to impress you (its so cute)

-didnt even connect the dots when you started going to classes and suddenly a new person started playing games with him, someone that never used their voice chat

-is stil so nervous to be around you in public even after you guys start dating so PDA is absoultly out of the question, hes not even actually in classes 99% of the time..

-after your courses are over you always end up in the ignihyde dorms on his bed telling him about your classes while playing games on his switch, while he plays games on his pc

-it takes a very long time for him to be able to kiss you, just anywhere

-lost his mind when you first kissed his cheek after the first couple dates (the dates where in his room and around ignihyde)

-his hair flared and it scared the shit out of you.. thought you actually killed him..

-when he does get more comfortable its a lot of forehead kisses or you shoulder

-when he does initiate kisses theyre very quick and he gets embarrassed so quickly (your just too damn pretty)

-he also fiddles with your hands a lot when he is talking, hes not used to talking so much to someone

-hell occasionally kiss your hands as well when hes talking, or if your talking he will to just do something so he stays focused (ADHD final boss..)

-you guys play games together a lot so thats just easiest to not completely distract the other from the game but still be affectionate

-if you guys are in public they just assume yall are dating, no woman is aloud that close to him that isnt his mother or hed be running

-still gets so nervous any time you kiss him

-making out is almost out of the question, the one time you did.. he almost lit fire to his dorm room..

-best friends with ortho of course, you both try to drag him out of his room as much as possible

-in short your the only person he allows himself to be himself around, besides ortho, your so damn important to him

you walked into idnihyde dorm after your classes had finished, walking down the hall as you saw ortho talking to other dorm members, "ortho! hey.. do you know where idia is?'

"oh hello! hes in his room, as always" he chirped and smiled before turning his direction back towards to what youd assume was lost and confused freshman

you nodded and headed off to his room, knocking before there was a lack of response and you walked in. you rolled your eyes as you looked at idia sat at his desk, curled into his chair playing a new game hed gotten that just came out. a favorite creator of his had just dropped a new game and you both were so excited to play it, "starting without me shroud?"

he squeaked and jumped in his seat as he heard your voice, head whipping towards you "oh- well- you know i just got excited.. a-and you were on your way anyways" he nervously rambled looking into his lap, he looked up and smiled sighing "h-how was your day?"

"nice rebound.." you mumbled, closing his door behind you as you threw your school game at the edge of his bed. walking to stand behind his chair, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and slumping into his neck, "eh its alright.. i dont mind. how is it so far?"

he smiled quickly and went on a 15min rant about the beginning of the game, the graphics, visuals, weapons, co-op ability, and so forth. you just smiled and placed a small kiss to his neck, unwrapping yourself from him to grab your own chair that you kept in his room so you could sit by him. he continued his rant, you placing small comments here and there, and he held your hand as he did. running his hand over your knuckles and tracing shapes on your palm.

you let him speak, lifting his hands to place a kiss on his knuckles, "sounds very interesting so far, you ready to keep playing?". he just nodded pulling up the game on his monitor again, pausing before he tuned and quickly pecked your lips. blushing he turned back to his monitor and started playing to distract himself, "..thank you for being here my love" he mumbled.

Ortho Shroud🔥

-were not being weird with minor chat, this is set in an area of you being with idia and the three of you just have a very close bond and ortho sees you as his family

-hes very excited when your in ignihyde

-hes also glad he now has someone else with him getting idia out of the dorm more so, he used to be upset his brother had no friends but when you came along he was so glad that he got out more. not entering club level social, but going to dorm leader meetings actually, some classes in person, et

-he loves to play games with you as well, any new game out, ortho wants to play with you or watch you play it (he has the best cheat codes for any game)

-no kissing here, but if it was itd be like a small chee kiss of just appreciation like itd be from a sibling

-he does hug you a lot though, especially when it means more progress for idia

-he was the main person pushing idia to be more social when he realized his brother had a crush

-overall is literally a little brother to you as well, and its so sweet

-other ignihyde dorm members comes to you and ortho for anything, theyre still afraid of idia

it was a day before a large break and most of the students were leaving campus, not the ignihyde brother though.. theyre parets were so busy there was no point in going back home for holidays. they could do what they were going to do here instead of bothering to travel.

what they didnt relize was that because you werent of this world, you also had no family to go home to.. which landed you all in the situation of hanging out in idias dorm as he played on his pc set up, you and ortho sat on his bed as you played on idias switch.

a new game has just come out and ortho was helping you get almost every single hack and cheat in the game, it was great. ortho gave you a big hug as you got something for him in the game, as you two both nerded out about a little farming game idia turned a bit and smiled at his brother and partner having such a good bond, it made him glad.

[twice-inamillion]

The Company

Strangers

Smut and Story Building (Stranger sex, teasing, rebound sex, deep penetration, creampie, blowjob) 

Chapter 5

2,610 Words

(Jessica and you have dinner together after her failed attempt to meet with her friends. She complains about her ex and you find your way to fuck her at the end, maybe a little too good. Now she can’t go to her ex or any other man after your lustful adventure.)

It’s been a busy couple of weeks in your personal and professional life. You haven’t had a chance to rest, besides the occasion blowjob at the office. This week, you’ve finalized two groups that will be debuting in the near future. You’ve waited so long for your first group to debut that you couldn’t help but support them the best you could. You made the decision to move them out of their cramped dorms and into a nicer and more spacious apartment meant for confirmed idol groups.

Wanting to see their reaction, you disguise yourself as staff and help them move in. You can’t help but smile at their reaction when they see their new apartment. You and IU give them a tour and get furniture arranged to their liking. As you carry some of the heavy items, you can’t help but notice one of the members eyeing you from time to time. “Where do you want this box?” She walks between you, points at where she wants her item and continues to follow you around. You then hear, “Jennie, stop following him and come help us bring these boxes.” You see Jennie’s face turn red from the comment that her groupmate Jisoo made. 

After a couple of hours, the five members thank you for your help, and you let them know to inform IU if you need any help, to which they happily agree.

——————

You’re heading up the elevator when it stops. The door opens, and you see a familiar figure. 

“Jessica?”

“Ahh, yes,” bowing after realizing you’re Taeyeon and IU’s boss. 

“Don’t need to be formal. Feel free to speak freely.”

“Okay.”

“What are you doing here?”

“I came to surprise IU and Taeyeon, but they’re not home.”

“Oh… I think they’re busy until late tonight.”

You can see her reaction change and say, “Seems like something is bothering you.”

“Yeah, I need to talk to them about something.”

“If you don’t mind, I’m willing to lend an ear. How about joining me for dinner?”

She stays silent and seems to think about it for a while but makes up her mind, “Yeah, I think I’ll take you on the offer.”

The two of you head to your apartment, “Wow, your place is so big. I didn’t know you had a whole floor to yourself.”

“It’s nice. I know I won’t have time to commute from home, so I moved next to the company, which makes it much easier. Want a drink?”

“Sure.”

You serve her a drink, and she sits on the stool, watching you prepare dinner. You make a nice Korean meal, and the two of you share some wine. She tells you about the problems between her members, but more about her failed relationship with her now ex-boyfriend. 

“He’s such a dumb ass. He was so scared of people finding out about our relationship that he just chose to distance each other.”

“His loss. If I was him, I wouldn’t care what people think.”

“Right, he’s such a wuss. I don’t need people like that in my life.”

“Maybe you’ll find someone that cares for you. I mean, look at you; you’re beautiful; who wouldn’t want to date you.”

“Aww, thank you. I would totally date you if you weren’t with Taeyeon,” says Jessica as she takes a sip of her wine.

“What do you mean together with Taeyeon?”

“Aren’t you to dating?”

“No, I’m not with anyone.”

“Oh… it just seemed with you were. She said you to had a thing.”

“We fucked, but nothing serious.”

“So you’re not together?”

“No.”

Jessica fixes her hair and undoes her blouse a bit, “You know, it's been a while since my ex and fucked. He was too intimidated by my popularity that he stopped giving me affection.”

“Oh really, maybe I can help you with that.”

“Hmm… I don’t know. We don’t know each other that well,” teasing you as she shows off a bit of cleavage. 

“If you don’t want to, that’s fine, but from the looks of it, you need someone to fuck you real good to make you forget that bitch of a boyfriend you had.”

She smirked at you, knowing that you hit the nail. “Not saying that I’ll let you, but if I did, what would you do to me?”

“I’ll take you right here, right now, and put you on all fours. I’ll put your ass up and shove my cock in that hungry cunt of yours and fuck you until you forget that ex of yours.” 

You could see that she was getting turned on by the way she would move her legs under the kitchen counter. You know she needs a good fucking, and she knows it as well.

“You think you can make me forget about him? You’re that good?”

“If Taeyeon told you about what do you think?”

“You’re just talking.”

You walk around the countertop, turn her stool around to face you, and say, “Just say the word, and I’ll guarantee you forget that ex of yours.” You look straight into her eyes; you can see the lust in her. You know the thin line she is about to cross; you can see it in your eye; all you need to hear is the magic words.

“Fuck me, make me forget.”

Those are the words you wanted to hear. The is no going back, especially for her. You’ll make sure you make her forget about that sad excuse of a boyfriend.

She wraps her legs around you as you pick her up from the stool and take her to the couch. She kisses you passionately on the way there, but you don’t care for that and toss her onto the couch. You take off your shirt and see her eyes widen, and biting her lip. Her reaction makes you smirk and decide to go all out. You’re not here for foreplay; you’re here to fuck the shit out of her. 

You pull off her skirt and panties, tossing them across the room, “Wow, so eager, huh.”

“I’m here to fuck you, right? Plus, I can see that you’re wet already, so let’s not waste any time.”

She nods her head, and you continue to undress, pulling down your pants and boxers, revealing your cock. 

She gasps when she sees your cock spring out and says, “Oh my god. Your cock is so big!”

“Bigger than your ex, huh.”

“Yeah, much, much bigger. His doesn’t even compare. Don’t think it’s all going to fit inside me, though.”

“It will. It fits inside of Taeyeon. I bet you’ll take me in nicely, too.”

You grab your cock and slap it on her slightly shaven cunt, just small traces of hair from not having sex in a while. She could feel the hot radiating from your cock, making her cunt leak even more.

“You like it?,” asking as you press your cock on her pelvis. “Yeah, I want you in me; make me forget of that dirtbag.”

You can help but smile as you align your rock-hard cock and slowly press the tip inside of the entrance. Jessica moans and whines, from how much you’re stretching her, “Oh my god! You’re so big!” You grab her hips with a firm grip and press your weight on her. She feels your thick cock spread her walls, “Fuck… it feels like you’re splitting me in half!”

“You’re so tight! How small was your ex? Feels like I’m the first one fucking you!”

She whines and groans as your try to insert more of your cock, “Much smaller! His cock is nothing compared to yours!”

You can’t help but laugh at the poor guy, “Damn, poor guy, but don’t worry; I’m going to stretch you real good,” as you slam your cock all the way inside Jessica’s womb. She screams in both pain and pleasure, “You’re hitting me so deep! Let me breathe a bit,” but you don’t let her. You’re here to fuck and enjoy and enjoy, so watching her whine turns you on. You increase the speed and strength of your thrusting and can see Jessica go in a state of ecstasy. Her body and mind are experiencing something they have never experienced before. 

You can’t help but smile at the sight of Jessica’s eyes rolling back and making her into a complete mess. It’s not long until she ends up having an orgasm, her body squirming, “Ahh… ahh, fuck! What’s going on? Why is my body feeling so hot? I feel like I’m going to pee!” and cries as she sprays you of liquid when you pinch her clit.

You pull your cock and are sprayed with Jessica’s liquid and see her panting. You immediately plugged your cock back inside of her, causing her to cough violently from the sudden pain of her womb getting stabbed. She tries to push you off, but it's no use. You can feel your own high arriving, and you need to see it through. 

Her walls were tight, and it was making you reach your peak; you know that it’s the first time you two actually met besides her casual visit, but you really want to cum inside of her like one of your sleeves. 

“Fuck… I’m about to cum.”

Jessica’s eyes go wide, and she says, “Wait… cum outside, pull out!”

“Nah… I’m going to cum inside!” you yell and grab her waist and blow your load inside of her. Jessica’s back arches and her body shakes as she feels your heavy white load invade her cunt. “Fuck…your pussy is milking me…”

It takes a while for Jessica to regain her composure, but after some time, she lifts her head up and says, “I told you to pull out. Why did you come in me?”

“You said you wanted to forget about your ex, right?”

“Yeah, but don’t just cum inside me.”

“Why not?”

“Just don’t. Not even my ex came inside of me,” she pouted.

“Haha, really?

“Yes, I made him wear a condom every time.”

“So that means I’m the first one to paint you white?”

“Yes…”

You can’t help yourself but get turned on again. You pick her up and carry her to the bedroom next to yours. She yelps when you toss her onto the bed and turn her over. You lift her, press her body down and lift her butt up in the air and spread her legs. 

“Wait…what are you doing?”

“What does it look like? I’m hard, and I really want to fuck you, so just relax and enjoy.”

“Wait… I’m not…” you don’t give her time to finish off her sentence as you quickly align your cock to her entrance and shove it in one go. “Oh fuck! You’re being too rough!”

You grab her ass and give it a nice feel before giving it a hard slap. Jessica groans in pain from your large hand on her rear but gets turned on. Seeing her reaction, you continue to slap her ass, every time with a heavy hand, until her ass is completely red. 

You thrust inside of her for about ten minutes until you’re at your peak once more. With your two hands, you grab her hips and bring them towards you as you place your weight on her and say, “I’m cumming! I’m going to paint your walls completely white. Your pussy is mine!”

You unload a massive amount of cum inside her, completely drowning her cunt of your seed, “Take my cum!” as Jessica’s blood comes rushing to her head. She grabs onto the bedsheets, gripping them hard as you drop your load into her cunt. “It’s too much; you’re going to drown me!”

You pull out your cock and watch your cum ooze out of her and stain the bed. “How was it?”

“Hot. I can feel the warmth right here,” she says as she points at her tummy.

———-

The two of you spend the whole night fucking, round after round. You smirk as she moans out your name and digs her nails deep into your arm as you fuck her. Anywhere from the hot tub, out on the balcony, and the shower. By the next day, she’s a mess, her womb completely yours and the shape of your massive cock. You know she’s ruined for any other man that’s not near your size. 

“Still remember your ex?”

“What ex?”

You can’t help but laugh as you enjoy a blowjob from Jessica while lying on the bed. With her hand around your cock she bobs her head. Her tongue coats every inch of you with a thick layer of saliva. You grab your phone and take a quick picture before Jessica notices. She lifts her and catches you, “Hey, what are you doing?”

You grab her head and press it back down, causing her to gag when your cock hits the back of her throat. The sudden reaction of hitting her throat causes you to bust a load. In a panic, she tries to drink as much as she can because it's too much for her and gags. You release your grip, and Jessica lifts her head up, coughing. You watch cum dripping out her mouth and back onto your pelvis. “Lick it off.” She sees your serious look and does as she’s told, licking off the cum she just spits out. 

Suddenly, her phone rings, and she grabs the phone from the nightstand. She answered the phone, and it was Taeyeon with IU. 

“Why haven’t you answered our texts? Where are you?”

“Sorry, I fell asleep after getting home.”

“Oh, okay, we’re sorry we were not able to meet yesterday. How about joining us for brunch?”

“Hmmm… I think we can…” She stops mid-sentence when she sees what’s in front of her. 

You wave your cock in front of her and whisper, “Want to go again?” 

She sees your limp cock get hard in a matter of seconds and is now at full length. She bites her lip and climbs on top of you, lifts herself to your cock, and with her free hand, aligns it to her cum stained, covered cunt before dropping her whole weight on you. She yelps from the girth and tightens her walls, “Ahh… actually, I have some last-minute things I need to take care of that might take me a while. How about meeting later next week?” 

“Oh… okay. Next week sounds good.”

“Okay, bye…” 

You grab the phone off her hands and end the call, throwing her phone at the end of the bed. “I see someone wants to go another round.”

“Shut up.”

“How about this round? Grab some breakfast after. Maybe dinner, too.” She smiles and begins to ride you. 

——————

The two of you end up sending the whole weekend fucking like animals. At the end of each session, she begs you to pump her womb with cum, even going as far as to breed her. Like a gentleman, you do as you're told and even tease about her ex; she pinches your thigh and tells you to fuck her harder. You even joke around and say, “Do you think we know each other better now?” 

[glenscowboyhat]

i never lie (t.owens)

hi omg this is my first full-length tyler fic! actually my first full-length fic in like 3ish years so pls be kind 😭 this one is based off of the song i never lie by zach top, with a few little changes! i recommend listening to it beforehand but i don’t think you have to to understand what’s happening! i hope you like it 🥹

warnings. a few curse words, implied female reader but no actual pronouns i don’t think, implied smut but it’s like one sentence, and general bad writing lol, plus i really like commas apparently. lmk if there’s anything i missed!

pairing. tyler owens x reader, slight scott x reader

word count. 2k

꒰ well, it’s been some time, you still look like an angel ꒱

꒰ i heard you’re doin’ fine, got promoted back in april ꒱

it had been four months since you’d seen the infamous tyler owens when you spotted him across a random bar in nowheresville, oklahoma. “oh, hell,” you said, spinning your stool towards javi’s at the bar and putting a hand over your eyes.

“what’s the matter?” he asked, glancing behind you. “oh,” was all he muttered as he silently got up from his stool.

“wait, where are you going?”

“you’ve got company, darlin’,” he murmured before slipping behind you and out of sight. you spin your stool once more, confused, when you see him. “tyler,” you sigh.

“long time no see, honey.” he settles onto what was once your friend’s stool with a frustratingly beautiful smirk. “don’t you look gorgeous as ever.”

“did you need something, tyler?” you ask, trying to gather yourself. seeing him here four months after your breakup was jarring to say the least. you figured he’d probably be in this area. there were some massive storms that were supposed to come through within the next few days. you just didn’t know he’d pick this bar to grace with his presence.

“just surprised to see you here is all,” he said. “can’t believe they finally let you out of the office and into the field.”

just a month after your breakup with tyler, you started a job working with storm par. even though you hated what they stood for, all you wanted to do was help victims in the aftermath of destructive tornados. now that you obviously weren’t working with tyler and his crew anymore, you moved on to the next best thing, making it your mission to help instead of hurt. through everything, you had remained close with the rest of the wranglers, keeping them updated on your life. when tyler heard of your new position, he was absolutely livid. he couldn’t believe you’d move on to ‘sleeping with the enemy,’ as he called it, just one month after the devastating, explosive fight that ultimately ended your relationship.

you’d been working in storm par’s offices, planning each chase, for nearly a month before you were promoted in early april to join scott and javi in the field. once again, tyler was pissed when he found out. you’d already hurt him by even agreeing to work with the exploitative company, but now you were putting yourself in danger on top of that, and he wouldn’t be around to protect you. it killed him to think about anything happening to you, but he was so angry and resentful towards you about the whole situation. he let his pride and his hurt block out how his heart truly felt about you.

꒰ and you met someone, your dad says he’s okay ꒱

“and you met someone, i hear.” you had. well, kind of. about a month after starting at storm par, you were still torn up over tyler. just as you were now, though you’d never admit that to him. he’d really hurt you all those months ago. anyway, scott was there to help you forget about the tornado wrangler. you both knew he was just a rebound, but scott quite enjoyed the late nights he spent with you in dingy motel rooms, and, more than anything, he really loved pissing tyler off. he knew that being with you got under tyler’s skin in a way that nothing else did, and you relished in the attention he showed you. though, it would never compare to that of the arkansas cowboy you’d grown to love so much.

“yeah, i guess so,” you meekly nodded. being so close to him again was making your chest burn and your eyes sting, and this conversation was terribly awkward. you wished the sticky floor of the bar would just open up and swallow you whole.

꒰ well, i’ve never been better, things are going my way ꒱

you were beginning to wonder what his motives were for coming over here. that was, until he began to speak again. “well, i just wanted to tell ya that the fans really miss you on the streams. although, did you hear we hit a million subscribers?” boone had excitedly told you about it the day it happened. you were thrilled for them, but you couldn’t ignore the pang in your chest that stemmed from the reminder that you wouldn’t be there to celebrate with them all. “yeah, ty. looks like things are really going your way,” you smiled. you were happy for him. you had to be.

꒰ i sleep like a baby; i never show up late for work ꒱

꒰ i don’t drink whiskey; i don’t know how it feels to hurt ꒱

“mhm,” he hummed. “i barely know how it feels to hurt anymore. i sleep like a baby, and we’ve caught every storm we’ve been in the area for for weeks now.”

you will the tears from your eyes as you force a smile. “that’s really great, tyler. i’m glad to hear you’re doing so well.”

꒰ oh, and i ain’t been lonely since you said goodbye; i wish i could say i miss you, but you know i never lie ꒱

꒰ yeah, i met somebody too, she’s a model out in l.a. ꒱

꒰ and she’s begging me to move, she says malibu is really great ꒱

꒰ ain’t decided if i’m going or not, but at the end of the day…꒱

“thanks. i met someone too, you know. her name’s emily. she lives in the dallas area, does modeling for a couple magazines out there. she says it’s really great.”

your throat squeezes even tighter; you know he’s trying to get a ride out of you on purpose now. you know, deep down, that you’ve hurt him by going out with scott. you steel yourself before responding. “oh, yeah? you gonna sell your place in little rock?” he half scoffs, expecting a different reaction. “ain’t decided yet. but at the end of the day, i’m good wherever i am.”

you give him a half-hearted grin, already starting to slip off your stool. “i’m happy for you, ty.” you say before subtly bolting out the entrance of the poorly lit room.

the second you hear the heavy door slam behind you, you begin gasping for air. hearing how well tyler was doing without you was quickly sending you into a tizzy. you try to stall your tears and calm your breathing, but the air around you is too thick, your skin too warm, and the hurt too intense. your chest feels as if it’s closing in on itself and you’re not sure what to do, and then you see them. the other wranglers are suddenly surrounding you. “y/n? are you alright? what happened?” lily asked. you shake out your hands, trying to control your breathing. “it’s-” deep, shaky breath. “it’s nothing. i’m fine. i’m fine.” they all continue to eye you, not quite knowing what to say, until boone speaks up. “oh, shit,” he whispered, mostly to himself, though you all heard it. “what?” dani asked. boone looks at her with wide eyes, “tyler’s been in there for a while already.”

you finally get your breathing semi- under control and nod. “i’m okay, i just- tyler was telling me how well he and you all are doing and it just.. kinda threw me. but i’m alright.” they all share a puzzled look before looking back at you with furrowed brows. “he told you he was doing well?” you nod once more. “yeah, said he sleeps like a baby, and that you guys haven’t missed a good storm in weeks,” you explain. they all collectively scoff before boone shakes his head. “that’s such bullshit. i had to share a motel room with him a few weeks back, he didn’t stop tossing and turning ‘til nearly four in the morning.” your brows raise. “yeah, and we literally missed what would’ve been a stunner just last week cause he couldn’t get his shit together in time,” lily adds. you shake your head in disbelief. “he told me he met someone. emily, i think?”

“oh, you mean that girl he went on three dates with before he decided she wasn’t what he wanted and sent her back to texas?”

now it was your turn to scoff. “what? why would he lie?” you had a little bit of an idea, but you didn’t want to get your own hopes up for no reason.

“y/n. you and i both know that he told that girl it wouldn’t work out because he’s not over you,” dani said. your eyes blur again. god, you really wish they’d stop doing that. “i- i don’t know why he’d tell me he found someone else if he hadn’t,” your voice breaks as dexter quietly slips away from the group and into the crowded bar. “who knows why tyler does anything? all i know is that he loves you more than-” she’s interrupted by the heavy door behind you busting open. “y/n,” tyler breaths. you’re frozen, eyes glued to him. “i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to upset you. i’m not with emily, and i haven’t slept properly in months. i miss you like crazy,” he steps toward you hesitantly. “i promised you i’d never lie to you and i broke it. all i ever do is hurt.”

the dam finally breaks and your tears begin to soak your reddened cheeks. “nothing is going the way i want it to now that you’re not with us, with me. i just wanted you to miss me the way i miss you but i went about it all wrong. i’m so sorry.”

you laugh humorlessly, “tyler, scott and i were never serious. he and i both knew that i never got over you. i miss you more than anything. i miss all of you guys,” you go to gesture behind you, suddenly realizing that the rest of the wranglers had disappeared, leaving the two of you to work this out. you turn back around with a small, watery smile on your lips. tyler has a twinkle in his eye as he takes another step toward you, hesitantly reaching for your hands. “honey, what’ll it take for you to take me back? i’m miserable without you.” his eyes are teary now, too.

your smile grows. “i’ll take you back, ty, as long as you promise to never lie to me again.”

he grins, his smile brighter than you think you’ve ever seen it as little tears drip from his eyes. “never again, baby. i promise, for real, this time.”

your laugh is genuine as you lean in to press your lips against his for the first time in far too long. as you pull away, your brows furrow once more. “how’d you know i was out here, anyway?”

tyler lightly squeezes your hips before answering, “dexter came into the bar just a few minutes before i came out here. he found me and told me that i better get my ass outside and try and get my girl back before it was too late. told me i had upset you pretty bad. i ran through the crowd as fast as i could to get to you; i had to tell you that i hadn’t meant to hurt you.”

you place your hands on top of his, running your thumbs over the tops of his knuckles. “it’s okay. i didn’t mean to hurt you either. i was just… having a hard time functioning without you and scott was there to take the edge off. i should’ve known it was a bad idea.”

he places a hand on your cheek, squeezing your hand with the other, still on your hip. he brings your lips to his again, putting all of the unspoken words and wasted time into the sweet kiss. “everything’s okay, now. but you gotta tell scott that it’s over between you.”

you giggle. “i’ll text him the minute we get back inside.” he lightly pinches your hip as he grins. “good. now come on, sweet thing. i’ve got a lot of time to make up for.” he slides his arm around your waist as the two of you begin to make your way back into the rowdy bar.

“hey, ty?”

“yeah, baby?”

“can i come back to the wranglers? storm par is so boring in comparison.”

he laughs loudly before proudly answering, “absolutely, honey. it’s great to have you back,” he responds before leaning in for one last sweet kiss.

꒰ wish i could say i hadn’t missed you, but you know i never lie. ꒱

[imaginesig]

“If they call me a slut, you know it might be worth if for once”

Lewis Hamilton x singer!reader

SMAU

yourusername

liked by lewishamilton, user1, y/nhq, and 402,038 others

yourusername: my muse <3

tagged lewishamilton

lewishamilton its an honor love

user1 when will I find someone to call me love

lando.jpg your own jpg account when??

yourusername I'll stick to my day job

user2 anybody else bothered by how quickly she goes from man to man

user3 right? like I swear she's had about 7 "muses" in the past 3 years

user4 she's literally done nothing wrong?? how dare a women date more than 1 person in her life??

carlossainz55 so new music when?

Charles_leclerc the Ferrari playlist needs an update

yourusername update loading 🔄

user5 oh please be a new album!!

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lewishamilton

liked by roscoovescoco, yourusername, user6, and 183,829 others

lewishamilton: race weekend with my loves

tagged: mercadesamgf1, roscoelovescoco, yourusername

landonorris interesting order

yourusername we all know Roscoe is the real star here

roscoelovescoco listen to the lady 🙌

mercadesmhf1 we love having the Hamilton family in the paddock

yourusername ahhh love to be there!!

lewishamilton 💚

georgerussell63 always a good time with these two in the house

yourusername ahhhh Georgie 🫶🫶

user1 "Georgie" 🥹😭

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tmz_offical

liked by user9, user1, user3, and 937,273 others

tmz_offical: just days after the end of the season, f1 driver Lewis Hamilton is spotted out with young girlfriend Y/n L/n. The couple is notorious for keeping their privacy, making paparazzi pictures a rare instance. Click the link in our bio to see what else was taken during their night out on the town.

tagged lewishamilton, yourusername

user1 no wonder they keep private, I would too if ended up trapped in a relationship with a slut like her

user2 didn't she and Dylan O'Brian break up right before they got together? Didn't think he rebound guy would last this long

user3 I could never imagine dating someone that much older than me

user4 fr someone tell her to take it down a notch, her sluttiness is showing

User8 the one sided hate is mid boggling

user5 the negativity is DEFINING

user6 right, y'all can't stand to see a women happy, healthy, and unbothered

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y/nupdates

liked by lewishamilton, user5, user9, and 749,934 more

y/nupdates: Y/n seen outside the studio with her producer after radio silence all winter!!

tagged yourusername

user1 she's cooking

user2 she's entering her reputation era I can feel it

user3 fr, after that one tmz post blows up and her comments are flooded with negativity, she locked herself away with her love, and is now seen for the first time in awhile leaving the studio

user4 I CANT HANDLE THIS RN

user5 not the slut trying for a comeback

user6 how about you lead by example? Leave and don't come back 🫶

user8 you know the records gonna slap when @/producer sprinkled her magic

user9 I need them and Taylor+Jack to release something

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yourusername

liked by user5, lewishamilton, y/nhq, and 394,028 others

yourusername: "Slut!" out now on all streaming platforms!! The rest of the album, "Amor Omnia Vincit" out this Friday!

when I originally sat down to create this new album I didn't image I'd write half the songs that made the final cut, but I did. This has been a very therapeutic experience for me.

Thank you to this album, my amazing team, and my lovely muse for keeping me going in the difficult time <3

tagged: y/nhq

lewishamilton you are so Shawn Hunter coded

lewishamilton I love you dear

yourusername I love you too darling

user1 they are so domestic I'm crying 🤭😭

user2 lets all start a thread of our fav lyrics from "Slut!"

user3 "if I'm all dressed up, they might as well be looking at us" WE KNOW THIS COUPLE ALWAYS BRING FIRE FITS

user4 very obvious but "if they call me a slut, you know it might be worth it for once," just hits so hard, like this is an issue she's dealt with for so long but Lewis makes it all better bc their relationship trumps everything

user5 piggy backing off of @/user4 's reasoning, "the sticks and stones they throw froze mid air"

user6 "IN A WORLD OF BOYS HES A GENTLEMAN" 🔛🔝

user7 I'm still not very her admitting that all the negavity around her dating has affected her so bad that she told Lewis "I said it might blow up in your pretty face"

scuderiaferarri we will not apologize for the people we'll become when this drops ‼️

Charles_leclerc we've always been #1 y/n stans

lewishamilton you red fuckers can take two steps back that's my title

carlossainz55 I thought you were her muse?

lewishamilton I'm both

user8 ok possessive king

youruserame for me and me only 🥰

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lewishamilton

liked by georgerussell64, your username, user1, and 789,739 others

lewishamilton: SO, SO, SO PROUD OF YOU LOVE!! Watching you work through a rough patch with such grace was beautiful. Thank you for allowing me to be apart of it and listen to these songs+more. I'll be your muse forever if you'll have me <3

tagged yourusername, y/nhq

yourusername forever and always <3

lewishamilton <3

user1 that water look very ~aquamarine~ to anyone

user2 he def knew what he was doing

lewishamilton I had a message to send 🤷🏾‍♂️

user2 LMAOOO HES SO PETTY

yourusername sassy man epidemic isn't a joke

user3 I love that she left like people wanted and wrote a whole song to shut down the hater but also put her and Lewis's relationship on the pedestal it deserves

producer such a sweet album!! Some of the best love songs out there!!

Charles_leclerc Vigilante Shit is my new pre-prix anthem

yourusername watch out @/maxverstappen1

maxverstappen this is where the dutch anthem falls silent 😔

carlossainz55 wasn't ready for Dress

yourusername but...

carlossainz55 its my fav

user4 I love that lewis posted for the whole album when Y/n didn't, but she's replying to comments in his section when he isn't

user5 they really are made for each other huh

roscoelovescoco amazing work mom!!

user5 I will never get over the mom

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yourusername

liked by landonorris, Charles_leclerc, user5, and 937,039 others

yourusername: surprise!! Since this album taught me what it was like to write and create in such an intamate space with very few people/outide influence I wanted to celebrate it with 3 small shows in Monaco, London, and Ottawa!

tickets on sale at 12 pm eastern this friday, see ya then ;)

tagged y/nhq

landonorris do friends get discounts??

yourusername everyone on the grid plus any serious significant others get VIP entry courtesy of me and my team 💖😘

y/nhq we'll be reaching out soon to select the show

lilymhe you don't understand how excited this makes me!!

yourusername well I couldn’t celebrate without my girls (and their men too ig 🙄🤚)

oscarpiastri thanks a lot y/n

alexalbon anybody else feeling loved??

lewishamilton completely 🫶

user1 this will start world war 3 I can feel it

user2 this is the eras tour all over again

user3 except that was selling stadiums, these are small venues

user4 any f1 driver want to link up for a show?? you'll never have to speak to me ever again

user5 I regret to inform you babe, but I think this is the reason she said serious significant others...

user6 official tour soon?? Please mother??

yourusername oh so very soon...

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lewishamilton

liked by your username, georgerussel64, landonorris, and 379,268 others

lewishamilton "got lovestruck went straight to my head" <3

tagged yourusername

user1 crying throwing up

user2 quoting her song?? that's about him?? I'll be resting my eyes on the highway if anybody needs me

user3 my toaster looks like a fun bath bomb

yourusername "got lovesick all over my bed" <3

landonorris beautiful show, beautiful couple 🧡

yourusername 🧡

scuderiaferrari maybe we're colorblind but that doesn't look like Mercedes green

mercadesamgf1 watch your back

georgerussell64 👀

georgerussell64 slayed so hard

yourusername an honor from the meme king?? I'm not worthy

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yourusername

liked by Charles_leclerc, user9, lewishamilton, and 930,393 others

yourusername thank you to everyone who came out to a show this weekend!! I had a blast sining new stuff, covers, and old pieces with you all- the love I experienced was unreal!! I cannot wait to see what happens in the future 💖

To all those close to me, our relationships mean the absolute world!! Special love to Lewis who held my hand through my darkest time, showed me what a true relationship was, and gave me a perfect little boy (I love you Roscoe). Darling, its been a wonderful experience being with you <3

tagged y/nhq, landojpg

lewishamilton love you so much angel <3

georgerussell64 definitely gave me and Carmen the night of our lives!!

alexalbon the show was so amazing I almost forgot you flirted with my gf in the invitation

yourusername stay mad

lilymhe 🥵

Roscoelovescoco can I come next time??

yourusername I'll see what I can do...

landjpg thank you for photo creddits and well as the opportunity to photograph these unique shows

yourusername you didn't not dissapoint 👏👏 thank you for doing it

Charles_leclerc I had an amazing time!!!

carlossainze55 you should hear him try to speak, voice complelty gone

yourusername that's the kind of energy we all need

comments have been limited

[neoneun-au]

CAN'T HELP MYSELF; CHAPTER III: WHO WAITS FOR LOVE?

―PAIRING: wonwoo x fem!reader, mingyu x fem!reader ―GENRE: love triangle au, fluff, mild angst, romantic comedy, suggestive, smut ―CHAPTER WORD COUNT: 11.2k ―CHAPTER WARNINGS: angst, mild language, alcohol consumption, masturbation (explicit female, implied/mentions of male), 18+ only ―STATUS: ongoing

―AUTHOR’S NOTE: i cant link them here, but please find the series masterlist and other chapters on my blog. i would love to know your thoughts on the story so far, this is really only fun with interaction and it helps keep me motivation to finish !

iii: who waits for love?

.

.

.

“You didn’t mention one of my roommates was basically a fucking model,” you complain, sinking into the absurdly massive grey sectional next to Jeonghan as he sits scrolling on his phone, attention removed from the drama providing background noise on the shared TV. 

“Who? Mingyu?” He tosses his head back with a bark of a laugh at the suggestion, “he’s a model idiot.” 

“Idiot or not you should have warned me he’d be so…so,” you toss your hands in the air, a dramatic display of frustration completed by the furrow in your brows. The image of Mingyu’s bare chest from your initial meeting (new and improved version 2.0 of hot roommate: now accompanied by a soundtrack of bed squeaks and the joy of someone else’s orgasm!) assaults your senses and you scrub it from your mind’s eye as best as you can before fixing your weary gaze back on Jeonghan, “so hot.”

“Oh please,” Jeonghan rolls his eyes as soon as the word falls from your lips. “Yeah he’s easy on the eyes, but once you get to know him his looks are much less impressive, trust me.” He shakes his head, raising his coffee to take a sip before pursing his lips and fixing you with a concerned stare, “I didn’t take you as the type to pine after tall, dark, and stupid. You’re not thinking of using him as a rebound are you?”

“What? Absolutely not,” the reply comes out perhaps more fervently than it should have because what was intended to deny the suggestion only serves to deepen the crease settling in between Jeonghan’s manicured eyebrows. You clear your throat and take a sip from the mug of tea growing cold in your hands as a cover. 

“Rebound,” you scoff at the word, trying to play off the twisting feeling in your gut with derision but only managing to dig the knife in deeper. “Definitely not. I have no plans to start dating anytime soon. Not after this breakup.” You’re aware that you’ve begun to ramble but as per usual, your mouth runs away with your words. Try as you might, you cannot scramble to retrieve them as they spill forward like a damn breaking open. Jeonghan stares at you with a slight frown as you monologue, “I barely even want to look at men full-stop. Don’t get me wrong, I mean, you’re okay, we’re friends and all. And Seungcheol is fine I guess ‘cause he lifted all of my heavy shit up the stairs like some kind of bodybuilding angel sent from protein-heaven,” a stray strand of hair falls in front of your eyes and you blow it away with a short puff of breath. 

“But dating? No. No, no, no,” you continue unabated, “absolutely not. I’m taking this time to get to know me. If anything, I’m dating myself. Mingyu might be hot but he won’t break my resolve, that’s for sure. I am determined,” you finish the speech with a single, firm nod–agreement with yourself clear and solid and in no way capable of breaking at the threat of warm brown puppy eyes flashed in your direction. 

“Right,” Jeonghan drags out the word, unconvinced by your impassioned declaration of independence. “Well, if you get bored of dating yourself and do end up wanting someone to mess around with for a bit, I can hook you up with some people. Serious or…less serious. Your choice.”

“I will be just fine on my own, thank you.” You nod once. Firm. Decisive. Not at all embarrassed by the display. 

“If you say so,” he sings, shaking his head and pushing himself off the couch before flicking the TV off. You sit in silence for a moment, sipping the last of your lukewarm tea, and listen as Jeonghan’ footsteps fade into the kitchen. The slight lingering guilt and shame from the night before stains your thoughts. A ring of liquid left on the surface of a coffee table, encircling the memory of Mingyu’s moaning and the keen sense of desire that burned a pit in your core at the sound.

Jeonghan returns from the kitchen a second later and sits down on the arm of the couch. He clears his throat to speak, more serious than you had seen since graduating university. “Listen, I’m not going to tell you how to live your life,” he begins. You inhale to laugh your disagreement of the statement but he holds up a single hand to silence you so you bite it back just as quickly. “I’m not going to tell you what to do, but I will just give you a warning, if I may” he lets his hand fall back down to his lap, “as your friend. And as someone who has your best interest at heart.” 

“Fine,” you allow, buying into the sincerity, “I’m listening.” 

“I said that I can hook you up with people both serious and not so serious,” he says, pausing to take a deep breath, “Mingyu is not serious.”

The image of the man in question pops up in your mind once more. An observable object–lips locked with the mystery brunette, hands roaming the expanse of her body as they flutter like a pair of dragonflies locked in a mating ritual towards his bedroom. The chorus of “ohs” and “ahs” that chorus in your ears like the audio from the old Italian softcore porn films you used to sneak out of bed to watch in your adolescence. The squeaking of the bed frame, and even the eventual abrupt departure first thing this morning, project themselves across the walls of your brain like a feel of film. All fleeting images and experiences serve as firsthand evidence backing up what Jeonghan is saying to you at this moment in the harsh light of day. 

“If you’re in it for a quick, no strings attached hookup then, well,” he sighs, brushing his bangs out from in front of his eyes, “you’re a grown woman, I trust you can make your own decisions. But I’ve never seen Mingyu with the same girl more than once. So just…be careful. Because if you want something substantial, you would be barking up the wrong tree with him.” 

You nod and the previous image of Mingyu–all roaming hands and bucking hips–dissolves pixel by pixel into the knitted brows of concern and the serious expression his classically handsome face held barely an hour ago. The warmth of his hand as it pressed ever so lightly against the skin of your forehead–an act so painfully tender and familiar it made you yearn at the intimacy of it. While your logical mind does believe what Jeonghan is saying, another part of you (a deeper and much more foolish part) can’t help but feel like there has to be more to Mingyu than the rest of them give him credit for. That maybe there is something to be taken seriously there. 

The thought dissipates into vapour as Vernon strolls down the stairs–bleary eyed and dazed with the lingering sleep still clawing at the corners of his eyes. He nods lazily in silent greeting, clad in tie dye and baggy jeans, and walks past the pair of you and disappears into the kitchen. 

“Just,” Jeonghan hesitates a moment, waiting for the sound of the fridge opening in the next room to disrupt the strained silence that had settled between you, “be careful, okay?” 

“Don’t worry,” you smile, genuinely grateful for the advice and care from your long-time friend, despite the bells of disagreement ringing out inside of you. “I’ll be fine.”

.

.

. 

“Do you think I need a rebound?” The question comes after an hour of banter and conversation over way too expensive cocktails in the dimly lit corner of the bar you used to frequent when you were still going to university with Seulgi. Her insistence that you get out of the apartment and stop stewing in your own thoughts had finally paid off and truthfully the distraction was not entirely unwelcome. But you were still stubbornly refusing to admit that she was right. The status quo of your friendship since the very beginning. 

“Didn’t you say you were swearing off men or something?” Seulgi asks, tapping a manicured fingernail against the side of her nearly empty manhattan. 

“That was before I saw the reality of the men I was swearing off,” you sigh, mourning the loss of your already weak resolve. Solemn regret for the poorly timed declamations you had given voice to in the past. “And the reality is that they're pretty fucking hot.” 

“You mean one of them is pretty fucking hot, right?” she emphasizes, ever observant, and you grimace at her over the lip of your own half-empty glass.  

“One of them looks like a Greek fucking God for no reason,” you grumble, turning to wave the waitress over for another round, “like Adonis or something. It’s not my fault I have functioning eyeballs.” 

“Adonis wasn’t a god, he was the mortal lover of Aphrodite.”

“Well whatever he was, I’m now stuck living in an apartment with him.” The young waitress walks up with an expectant look and Seulgi orders another round of the same while you drain the last of your drink, savouring the bitterness of the gin as it lingers at the tip of your tongue. You watch the waitress as she walks back towards the bar, brunette ponytail swinging behind her like in rhythm with her steps, and wonder vaguely if maybe she’s the girl you saw Mingyu with. 

Seulgi turns back to you with a slight roll of her eyes, “I’m sure it's not that bad. Just ignore him, you’re mostly working or asleep  when you’re not just hanging around bugging me anyway.” 

“Pretty hard to ignore him when he’s so openly hooking up with some random girl in a condo with 4 other people who can clearly hear him.” 

“Well put some earphones in or something, listen to a podcast,” she laughs, shaking her head. You bite your tongue, reluctant to mention the fact that you had willingly listened in as they fucked. That maybe you had enjoyed it a little more than you were letting on. You didn’t need the inevitable teasing that was bound to come if you told her any of that. “Do you remember our one roommate? From second year?” 

“Oh god,” you balk at the memory, “Johnny?” 

“He was so loud,” she grimaces. So many late nights spent huddled together on her bed watching movies, joined in mutual avoidance of the self-proclaimed playboy and his rotating roster of girls. “And then you went and hooked up with him which was just the worst. He was so insufferable after that.” 

“Hey, in my defense I was desperate and not exactly in my right mind,” you bristle at the thought of your pathetic, erstwhile crush. Surely, you had thought in the throes of your youth and naivety, someone who pulled that many girls knows exactly how to make them feel good. Yet by the end of it, as he lay open-mouthed snoring on the bare mattress next to you, you were left with a clear idea of why you never seemed to see the same girl more than once. “Anyway, from the sounds coming out of her, Mingyu seems to actually know what he’s doing in bed.” 

“So you did listen,” she smirks. 

“The walls are thin,” you let the paltry excuse fall from your lips as she tosses her head back in laughter. Gulping down a mouthful of water in a vain attempt to swallow some of the embarrassment boiling like hot lava in your bloodstream. 

“What do you think they were doing?” Seulgi leans forward with a conspiratorial gaze–brown eyes full and bright and filled to the brim with a hint of evil. There have been a few moments throughout your years of friendship where she has fixed you with a look like this, and most of them led to some of the worst decisions either of you have ever made. Breaking into the community swimming pool after dark, stealing the neighbouring houses’ lawn ornaments, making out with dudes that may or may not have been married. Her desire for intrigue terrified and excited you in equal measure. 

“Pretty sure they were fucking,” you respond and she sits back, disappointed at the bland reply. 

“Yeah, I got that part. I mean details. If we’re gossiping, we should do it right.” 

The cacophony of the bar consumes you. Chatter and laughter from nearby tables floods your senses, drowning out the roar of guilt that knocks at the door of your mind as you consider your next words carefully. Whether to completely dive off the deep end and betray your new roommates privacy (in more ways than you already have). If you had been a little more sober and a little less intrigued by the man in your own right, you might have shut the topic of conversation down before it even began. You might have left the apartment for the night and slept on a chair in the lobby and avoided the entire tryst to prevent the memory of his moans from carving themselves into your temporal lobe. 

But you did not and now you are just as invested in the situation, and Seulgi’s complete lack of shame about asking for details further strangled any lingering guilt you had left. “Well,” you start and she leans in closer, eyes alight with anticipation, “they started in the hallway. I thought they were going to have sex right against the wall while I was trapped hiding behind the couch.” 

She laughs, head tossed back in mirth, “bet you would have loved that. Mingyu, bare ass out in front of you,” she jeers and you bristle at the accusation (even if you know she’s right). The waitress returns with your drinks and you mumble a brief thank you to her as she sets the glasses down. Seulgi continues to laugh, pleased with your reaction, “it would have been your wet dream come true.”

“Okay, that’s it. I’m not saying anything else,” you grumble into your fresh drink, wincing at the bite of the liquor. Cocktails were never your thing but Seulgi had offered to pay so who were you to refuse. 

“Aww,” she whines, “fine, fine, I’ll stop teasing you. Please give me the play by play. I am so curious.” She claps her hands together in mock prayer, pleading for your cooperation, and you think she might make an excellent lawyer or serial killer if she weren’t so normal most of the time.

“Fine,” you relent after a beat, already too wrapped up in reliving the night to abandon the story anyway. “Obviously,” you stress, “that didn’t happen. They were making out there for maybe like 5 minutes but it felt like hours. I was so worried she was going to see me but thankfully I managed to stay pretty low.” 

Seulgi takes a sip of her darkly coloured drink, you can tell she wants to interject but she manages to hold true to her promise. 

“So they stumble off to his room,” you continue with a sigh, “and I go to mine, which, mind you, is right next to his. We share a wall.” She winces and you give her a knowing nod, steeling yourself against the all too vivid memory. “I crawl into bed, trying to block out the noise for a while, which at this point isn’t too loud. It’s just like…some muffled talking and moaning and the occasional slap of like…skin on skin. Maybe he spanked her…” you trail off, shaking your head along with the words, fully invested in the theatrics of the storytelling now. “But, through some cruel twist of fate his bed, just like mine, is also right up against our shared wall. So as soon as they really get going, I can feel it.”

“What, like…” she thrusts in her seat, a quizzical slant to her eyebrows, “like shaking?” 

“Yup,” you pop the ‘p’ for emphasis and she lets out a low whistle. 

“For how long?” 

“I don’t know,” you shake your head, “felt like forever. I was just clutching my sheets like it was an earthquake or something.” You do conveniently leave out the heat of desire and curling of toes, but she didn’t need to know that part. 

“Did it start off slow?” she asks, voice conspiratorial. “Fast? Do you think he ate her out first?”

“Seulgi,” you hiss, keeping your voice low. You glance over at the table of college guys next to you but they don't appear to have been listening.

“What, I’m not allowed to ask?” She balks, hand on heart, and appears offended for a moment before the usual mischievousness settles back in and she leans forward with a glint. “Did Wonwoo ever eat you out?”

“We are not discussing the details of my sex life right now.” 

“No of course not,” she rolls her eyes, “we’re just discussing the details of someone else’s.” You grumble at the inability to argue with this statement. “How long has it been since you got laid anyway?” 

“I don’t know,” you sigh, dropping your head to the table and then regretting it immediately when you realise how sticky it is. “Like five months maybe?”

“Five? Didn’t you break up with Wonwoo like…” she fixes her eyes on the ceiling for a brief moment, calculating the time passed in her head before turning back to you with frown lines creased into her forehead, “six weeks ago?”

You shrug, sinking your embarrassment into another sip of alcohol, “so we hadn’t had sex in a while, so what?” 

“Do you think maybe that was a contributing factor in your dissatisfaction with the relationship?” She leans back in her chair, crossing her arms. 

“I don’t need a therapy session, Seulgi.” 

“On the contrary, I think you would benefit greatly from therapy,” she laughs, “but that’s not what this is. You’ve just been sort of distant lately.” You open your mouth to protest but she stops you with a glance, “don’t start, I know we’ve been hanging out, but over the last few months you haven’t been as open about your emotions and stuff. You used to tell me everything, even things I didn’t want or need to hear, but for a while it feels like you’ve just been…hiding. Internalizing.” She leans forward and taps the center of your forehead with one, manicured finger. “Stop that. It’s not good for you to be in your head so much.”

“I hate to say it but, you’re right,” you sigh, begrudgingly agreeing with her observation. The skin where she had poked you tingling in the aftermath of her touch like a beacon of truth.

“I always am,” she nods, “but seriously. We’re friends. I want to hear how you’re feeling. I know I make fun of you a lot, but that’s just ‘cause you’re so easy to make fun of.”

“Hey!” 

She laughs and you’re reminded of why she and Jeonghan always got along so well. “Seriously though,” she says, expression sobering, “maybe you wouldn’t fixate so much of your loneliness and desperation onto random guys if you got out of your head a bit more regularly. Just a thought.” 

“It's not desperation, I just…” you trail off, unsure of where to begin. Unsure even of what your own internal landscape was trying to tell you. You wanted to confide in her, to be more open and transparent, but it was hard to do that when none of you couldn’t even sort out your thoughts and feelings from your anxieties and worries. It was hard to be clear when everything just felt like mud. She waits, expectant, as you sift through the much for some clear strand of thought. “You’re right, about the loneliness anyway, I know you are.” She nods, dark hair spilling over her shoulders. “But it’s not desperation.”

“So then what is it?” she asks and you try to place it. Try to tug on the thought to follow where it was leading you. What was it about Mingyu that made you feel like you were chasing something? Clawing at the walls of some well of yearning like a prisoner of your own desires. What was it about him that was making you want more? More information, more contact, more, more, more. 

“I think,” you start, hesitant to speak the word lest it be wrong. “I think it’s curiosity.”

“About Mingyu?” 

“Yeah, him. And about myself,” you shake your head. Ruminating on your spiraling thoughts was one thing, but vocalising them for someone who knew you oftentimes better than you knew yourself was another thing entirely. Your thoughts held more weight now that someone else was bearing witness to them. They had more consequences now than just 15 minutes of anxiety or a few hours of doom-scrolling.

“What about yourself?” she asks, unraveling the mess as you present it to her. 

“I feel like…I’ve been in this strange place between needing people for everything and also trying my best to not need anyone at all. I can’t do my taxes without help, I can’t change a tire without help, I can’t even move apartments without it! But when it comes to emotions or vulnerability…I would rather just deal with it on my own, you know?” She nods, attention focused completely on you. Despite how long you’ve been friends, the direct attention still flickers a switch of shyness inside of you.  

“That’s what it was like with Wonwoo, too. He was never the most emotionally available person and I think I just got used to dealing with things on my own because of it. I didn’t want to burden him with my thoughts or feelings cause I know I have a lot of them. Don’t get me wrong, though, it wasn’t like he refused to listen or anything I just…he just wasn’t really open with his own feelings or thoughts so I sort of started to feel guilty about dominating those conversations all the time with mine. Like I was using him as some sort of emotional punching bag. And then I just got used to it, and it took so long for me to realise that I needed something more than that…” 

Any hesitation you had felt before dissipates as you talk, little by little. You feel like you’re back in your dorm room together, laying on your floor and just letting yourself pour out every thought, every feeling, every worry you had. Stream of consciousness–your lips to Seulgi’s ears. That open vulnerability you shared before life and work and everything else got in the way and left the door open for inhibition, shame, and guilt to move into the space between.

You feel lighter as you speak, like you had been needing this–craving it. Waiting for her invitation to come to let loose the torrential downpour of your mind to a willing listener. To a friend. 

She was right. She always was.

“So what is it about this Mingyu guy, then? You don’t think he would just be the same?” She asks, shifting the focus, and you purse your lips in concentration. 

“I’m not sure…” you trail off. And you really weren’t sure. Was he just an idle fascination after all? Did you just find him hot and that smoke screen of good looks was blinding you to the fact that he was just some guy like everyone before him? Or was there actually something there, in spite of it all? You mull it over while Seulgi takes a leisurely sip of her drink. “I was talking to Jeonghan the other day, and he said something that sort of made me think–”

“That’s a surprise,” she laughs, unable to resist the opportunity for a jab at your mutual friend. 

“He said ‘Mingyu is not serious’ and I don’t know,” you continue, unabated by her comment, “I get this feeling that that’s not the full truth.”

“What, like psychic intuition?” she laughs and you shake your head. 

“No, no…well, maybe. I don’t know. Obviously I don’t know the guy very well yet, and I have seen him do exactly what Jeonghan was warning me he does but…” you sigh, trying to collect your scattered thoughts of the man that is currently plaguing your mind. “He has also been very thoughtful, and he seems to notice such small details that the others don’t. I don’t know…I just think there might be something more to him than that, you know?”

“And you think you’re going to be the one to discover that side of him?” she asks, eyebrow quirked. Astute as ever. 

“No,” you start, but catch yourself in the lie immediately. “Well, yeah, I guess. I just want to see if my hunch is correct.” 

She fixes you with a withering gaze, dark brown eyes boring into your own for a moment before she laughs again, “Oh I get it now, you want to fix him.”

“I can’t help it, I love a project,” you sigh, resting your cheek in your palm and tracing idle circles against the wood grain of the table top. 

“So take up crocheting or something! Stop throwing yourself at every man who looks like a kicked puppy.” You groan at the accusation but can’t deny the truth in it. You did have a track record. “Look, if you want to do this. Really want to crack that big beefy chest open and see what’s inside, I’m not going to stop you, but I’m warning you now that I do not think this is going to end well.”

“You sound like Jeonghan,” you mumble, eyes closed as you listen to the lecture. 

“Good, at least someone you live with has some brains.” She shakes her head, pausing to hand her card to the waitress as she walks over with the bill for the evening. Silence stretches out for a moment, the din of the bar enclosing in to envelop you in its swell as you wait for the transaction to finish. The waitress returns and Seulgi slips her card back into her wallet before turning back to you, “I’m not saying this to be mean, but I really think you should take some time to be with yourself before you end up repeating the same mistakes you made with Wonwoo.” 

“Harsh,” you mutter, feeling the sting of it spear through your heart and settle there. Slow poison. 

She softens, eyes warming as she slides off her chair. You follow suit and walk with her out into the chill of the night. The bitterness of winter was starting to seep slowly into the air, you can feel it biting at your skin as you step outside with her to wait for the Uber she ordered to pull up.

“I love you and I want what’s best for you, and if you think that there might be something there with this Mingyu guy then I hope you’re right, I really do,” she says, a smile softening her expression. “I just want you to be careful, ok?” 

“Okay,” you sigh, hugging your arms tight against your chest to fight off the wind as it blisters through your thin jacket. “I love you, too. And I will be careful, I promise. I’m not really too keen to repeat my last relationship either…”

“Good,” she nods, eyes roaming to the curb as a slick black sedan pulls up. “I’ll see you soon. Try not to throw yourself too big of a pity party before then.” She waves goodbye as she strides towards the car. You roll your eyes, returning the wave, before starting your brisk walk the few blocks back to the condo.

.

.

.

Time passes slowly in the new stasis of your life. You take the new opportunity in the wake of your hangout to bury yourself in work and get through some projects that had been building up untouched while you were feeling sorry for yourself. You kept up with regular jogs with Seungcheol, largely at his behest, and they were starting to become an enjoyable break in your days. A way to clear your mind and focus your attention on your body. It also did not escape your notice that the route he was taking you on now steered clear of the street where you had seen Wonwoo a few weeks ago. You use your commitment to the new routine as a silent thank you to him for somehow knowing what you needed when you needed it.

Vernon was becoming a favourite of yours as well. A quiet denizen of the condo; he showed up at random hours, taking a seat near you but not too close, reading through scripts or scrolling on his phone in companionable silence as you worked. It was like living with a cat that took care of itself and had an impressive collection of beanies. 

Mingyu you tried to avoid, for the most part. He still plagued your thoughts on a daily basis, but out of respect for your friends’ concerns you wanted to give this budding infatuation time to settle into shape. To give yourself time to try and figure out what your real feelings on the matter were. You tried to find a delicate balance between roommate and acquaintance, figuring out his general schedule and adjusting your own accordingly so that you weren’t caught in any more awkward situations in the middle of the night or without anyone else around. 

All of these measures were helping to make you feel more at home in the condo. Less like an interloper disrupting their days and more like a part of the makeshift family–even if that part for now was cousin, twice-removed. 

As a result you were spending less time doing your work from the cafe and much more of it huddled over your laptop on the coffee table in the living room. Projects were getting done quicker, though it did mean that you were seeing Seulgi less often. 

“Why aren’t you answering my texts?” Seulgi’s face blinks to life on the screen of your phone as you finally accept her FaceTime call. “Are you still moping?” 

“I’m not moping!” you defend, raising the phone to hide the view of the pajamas you’ve been wearing for the past 24 hours as you were locked in a death-match with an upcoming deadline.

“Well how many more projects do you have left to do before we can go out? It’s been two weeks since I saw you now that you’re actually working from home,” she sighs in exasperation. Judging by the smoked out black liner defining her eyes, she was heading out tonight with or without you anyway. “Yerim is in town and she’s been asking about you.” 

“Yerim? Wait, since when? I thought she was still in England?” you straighten up at the mention of your distant friend’s name.

“She’s back for now to get some visa renewal stuff done,” Seulgi answers, “and we’re going out tonight so you should come if you’re not still buried under a mountain of work.”

You glance at the screen of your laptop, folders stacked on your desktop in a messy landscape of the digital mountain you created for yourself. The thought was tempting but you knew Yerim and you knew what a night out with her always entailed. Read: getting black out drunk in a club and stumbling home at 6:00am the next morning. You had made a lot of progress scaling your workload, but you weren't sure that even without work you would have the energy needed for a night out like that. 

The front door clicks open behind you and you spin your head to spout a quick greeting. Mingyu nods a quick hello, arms loaded with bags of groceries, before disappearing into the kitchen. 

“Who was that?” Seulgi asks, noting the interruption in your conversation.

“Mingyu,” you answer, mindlessly pushing yourself off the ground and bringing her with you as you walk into the kitchen behind him in search of a glass of water. He smiles at you as you enter but says nothing as Seulgi’s voice rings out through your phone.

“Ah,” she smirks, “the one with the nipples?” You roll your eyes at the clear attempt to embarrass you but nod��pointedly ignoring the man in question as he sputters next to you at the comment. You fill a glass with water from the filtered jug in the fridge. “So are you coming tonight or should I tell Yerim you’re too depressed?”

You give it a moment of thought. You haven’t seen Yerim since she moved to the UK in the middle of her third year of university, after the rest of you had already graduated. She sent some odd gifts here and there—chocolate, snacks, a figurine of Shakespeare wearing heart print boxers—but communication had dwindled as you all found your footing in your adult lives, far removed from the heady days of hedonistic college life. 

“Well first of all, don’t tell her I’m depressed, ‘cause I’m not,” you emphasise and Seulgi laughs at the bitter defense, “but I don’t think I can make it tonight. We should make plans for dinner or something before she leaves, though. Something a little more lowkey than the club.” 

“Fine, be boring,” she sighs. “By the way, Yerim brought a friend back with her. He’s apparently cute and not completely useless. She thought you might like to meet him, just as a distraction. Or a rebound that’s not going to jeopardize your living situation. He’s also coming tonight” 

You groan, settling down in a kitchen chair—opposite to the one Mingyu had sat down in with his reheated leftovers. He watches you with mild interest out of the corner of his eye while you try to think of a way to convince Seulgi that you don’t need Yerim’s charity date. “I would, but I already have plans tonight,” you lie, hoping she buys it without question.

“Oh?” she asks, eyes narrowed in cautious suspicion. “Do you have other friends?” 

“Very funny,” you roll your eyes, “but no, actually. It’s just with my roommate.”

“Which one?” she probes, digging you deeper into the grave of your own lie.  

“Oh uh–” you stutter but your eyes flicker above the screen of your phone, locking in on Mingyu’s own wide brown gaze. “Mingyu. We’re going to dinner tonight.”

He opens his mouth to speak, clearly confused by being dragged into your mess, but you shake your head lightly—willing him to just roll with it. He clamps his mouth shut and returns to his bowl of stew. 

“Mingyu?” Her surprise is genuine and you can tell she’s starting to believe you. A flicker of concern shines in her eyes. “Is it like…a date?” 

“No, Seulgi,” you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose between your thumb and forefinger. She was edging dangerously close to that  ‘jeopardizing your living situation’ territory on her own. “It’s just dinner. With a roommate.” 

“Okay,” she drawls, “but if you end up against a wall with his face between your thighs—”

“Goodbye, Seulgi,” you end the call with a panicked stab of your finger and lean back in your chair, eyes shut tight against the rising tide of anxiety. You feel lightheaded. Hopefully Mingyu didn’t catch that last part. 

“Did we—” He clears his throat. His voice, hesitant and low, floating in and dispeling your faint hope that he hadn’t been paying attention. “Did we have plans I forgot about?” 

You want to laugh, he sounds so genuinely worried. It forces a bitter bubble of bile to rise up into your throat. “No,” you shake your head, clearing it with a sip of water. “Don’t worry you don’t have to go out to dinner with me, I just really didn’t want to go out tonight. Yerim is sort of wild sometimes and the thought of meeting some stuffy English guy in a club was making me feel ill.” 

“Oh,” he smiles—also hesitant, but you can see a hint of his canines poking out behind his lips. “Well, glad I could be of service, then.” His smile widens and you can’t help but return it with one of your own. 

“You have been most helpful,” you laugh. “Sorry for using you as a scapegoat. Also sorry about the nipples thing, Seulgi has a selective memory.” 

“I don’t mind,” he shakes his head, the flush of warmth in his skin betrays the hint of embarrassment he’s trying to mask. You smile at the grace he’s giving you in what could have been an exceptionally awkward moment (especially after weeks of avoiding being alone with him) and push your chair back–wooden legs sliding against the tile. You stand up, preparing to turn around and hunker back down in front of your laptop screen, but Mingyu calls out your name before you get the chance. 

“Yeah?” you reply, half-turned towards the living room. 

“If you do,” he pauses, clearing his throat. “If you do want to go out to dinner tonight though…I could do that. I would uh…I’d like that.”

Your eyes trail from his still slightly pink face to his nearly empty bowl of leftovers. “But you already ate?” 

“Yeah,” he laughs, hand rubbing the back of his neck. A gesture so familiar to you from spending so much time with Wonwoo, but it looks different on him. Less like an anxious tick and more like a bashful habit. “I can eat again though,” he drops his hand from his neck and pats his stomach twice, “I’m a bottomless pit.” 

You should say no. You know you should say no. You shouldn’t dig yourself any deeper into this hole than you already have. But looking at him now, eyes so wide and genuine—freely offering you this tether of kindness—you can’t seem to bring yourself to summon up the word.

“Okay,” you reply, deadpan. Numbed with the confusion and surprise of this sudden change of plans so easily agreed to. So easily ruining weeks of careful avoidance and the cooling off of the one-sided tension you felt when you were near him. 

“Great,” he grins, white teeth glistening in the bright lights of the kitchen. “I need to grab a shower first and make a quick call, but how about we head out in an hour? What kind of food are you in the mood for? Do you have any favourite spots?” 

“I uh—” you stammer, unsure of the answer to the posed question. “I’m fine with anything. I don’t go out for dinner a lot so I don’t really know that many restaurants…”

“No problem,” he smiles again, standing up and grabbing his bowl. “I know plenty, I’ll bring you to a good one. Promise.” He winks before turning around to rinse out his dish and your heart skips a beat at the expression. One you would so often find lecherous and off-putting seems somehow so endearing coming from him. You scold your brain for the thought before stalking back to your room to change out of your pajamas and attempt to appear somewhat presentable. 

.

.

.

The lights of the city cast their soft glow over the water of the slow moving river. A hypnotizing dance of yellow and gold against the backdrop of the night sky. It lulls your thoughts–quietens them to a dull roar–as you sit next to Mingyu on a park bench.

You had finished dinner a half hour ago; a mouthwatering feast of flavour grilled by the deft hands of your roommate himself. You watched as he took to the task with an almost reverent disposition—ushering the food through the cycle of cooking as you sat across from him, absorbed in the aroma and savouring each morsel he placed in front of you. 

You had worried that he was going to take you to some uptight, fine dining restaurant where each dish was somehow the size of your pinky finger while costing more than you made in a day (Mingyu did have a vibe of luxury about him); but when he opened the door to the small, hole-in-the-wall barbeque joint in a random side-street you felt the tension in your shoulders ease and you were finally able to let yourself relax. 

He ordered–a generous selection of high-quality but reasonably priced beef–and you sat and ate and talked. It was normal and nice and the old wood-planked walls of the restaurant leant the entire dinner an air of casualness that your anxiety-addled brain desperately needed. Just a nice normal dinner with a roommate who you did not have any romantic attraction to at all.

Conversation continued after dinner ended. He was easy to talk to, easy to listen to, and you lost yourself in it, completely forgetting about your previous plan to avoid him, as he paid the bill. You continued to talk as you left the restaurant, stepped back out onto the street, and as you continued to walk together until you saw the Han River stretching out in front of you. 

You hadn’t been paying attention as you walked–just let your feet move under the vague assumption that you were just heading back home–so reaching the river had come as a surprise. Mingyu’s face remained impassive as he led you past the numerous couples dotting the riverbank, each splayed out on grass and blankets, bathed in the soft amber glow of the city. You followed him for a few hundred feet until he stopped at a small hill and sat down on a bench, draping his arm casually over the back as he leaned against the sun-faded wood.

You hesitate a minute before sitting down. The mirage of purely platonic companionship had dissipated step by step as you followed him downstream, watching the way his jacket moved against his torso–loosely fitted but structured enough to hint at the firmness of his shoulders underneath, swelling as his arms swung idly at his sides. Your mind blaring a fire red warning in Jeonghan’s voice: be careful. Mingyu notices you hesitate and offers a warm smile, just touching at the corners of his eyes. He moves over an inch on the bench to give you more space and your heart takes that moment to consider itself some sort of acrobat in your chest. You silence the warning, washing it out with your own self-soothing lies, before taking a seat next to him and focusing on the night skyline. 

Living in the city always felt isolating. Like the loneliness of existence was only amplified by the millions of other lives that played out parallel to your own. Millions of other people with different thoughts, feelings, and experiences existing right next to yours–there, but never touching. Lines crossing and converging but rarely intertwining for longer than a heartbeat. 

Wonwoo had been an anchor in that sea of loneliness. Something solid to hold onto as you were buffeted by the waves of life. Stabile, grounding. You never realised how much you needed that stability until it was no longer there. Until you were cast adrift once more, alone in the deep blue. 

Seulgi was there of course–as well as your other friends and family–but it wasn’t the same. They were islands of reprieve to visit when needed, and to offer the same when they did, but it wasn’t the same as having that one person to tether yourself to. To merge your life with and create a new island on solid foundations. Unshakeable, until it’s not. 

Maybe you were pathetic, relying on a partner for so much support. Needing someone to rescue you from your own life. Maybe you needed to save yourself for once. 

“Do you ever get the feeling like you’re going to end up dying alone?” you ask the question, half expecting it to dissolve into the air in front of you and go completely unanswered. Unsure if you even want an answer or if you just needed to remove the thought from your mind.

Mingyu scoffs, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips as he glances at you sideways–evaluating. “I don’t think that’s going to be a problem for you.” 

“Oh?” you raise an eyebrow, a twinge of offense scurrying up at the comment. “And what makes you so sure of that?”

“Well, what makes you think you would?” he counters and you let a small laugh slip out at the seriousness of his expression. 

“I don’t know,” you shake your head, dismissing the thought and turning your attention back towards the view. Bitterly regretting altering the mood so seriously. You should have remained flippant, joyous. Unserious. But when did your mouth ever listen to you? “I was just thinking out loud.”

“Oh no you don’t,” he laughs, “you brought it up and now you’re avoiding the question?” You feel the heat of his body warm the air around you as he adjusts on the bench, angling away from the river to better face you and pry the answers free under the weight of his attention.

“You avoided mine!” you bite back in defense, turning in kind to face him, but realising the trap too late as he flashes you a wolfish grin.  

“Ah-ha, so it was a serious question!” he cries, pleased with himself. “Listen if you want my honest answer, I will give it to you but I want an answer in return as well.” 

You hesitate, not for the first time tonight—wavering at the edge of the offer and cursing your propensity for sticking your foot straight into your mouth at the drop of a hat. 

Do you really want to open up to him like this? 

It had been such a nice evening. Good food, good conversation, and a nice walk along the river. It had been a while since you had felt so at ease in someone's company. And yet, despite all of that, you had to go and get lost in your self-sabotaging, meandering thoughts and open your big dumb mouth. Did Mingyu even really want to know? He seemed friendly and open enough but you can’t help but hear Jeonghan’s voice as it bounces off the walls of your mind: ‘Mingyu is not serious’. Did he know what Pandora’s Box he was willingly opening by asking you? Did he care?

You fix your gaze on him, evaluating, searching his eyes for any sign of ambivalence or even trickery. He stares back, waiting patiently for you to mull it over, and you come up with no discernable ulterior motive. Nothing lurking in the clear brown of his eyes other than open curiosity and a slight glimmer of amusement. 

“Ugh, fine,” you relent, falling back against the bench with a huff. You forgot Mingyu’s arm is resting against the back and you feel the pressure of it against you as you settle deeper into the bench. “Why do I think I’m going to die alone…” you repose the question, willfully ignoring the shiver that ripples out from the spot where his arm is pressed against you. You can feel the warmth of it even through your jacket. “Maybe because I’m a bit of an anxious wreck and that can’t be easy to deal with. Or maybe because I’ve managed to fuck up every relationship I’ve ever been in.”

“I don’t think so,” Mingyu replies, assured in his denial of your reasoning. 

You let out a mirthless laugh and glare into the middle distance. “Don’t think so? Don’t think what? That I’m not an anxious wreck? You clearly don’t know me that well.”

“No, I believe that part, though anxiety can be treated to a certain extent. I have this psychologist friend, Minghao, he talks a lot about it. I could get you his number if you want.” he offers and you furrow your brow at the suggestion. 

“You want to set me up with a psychologist?”

He laughs, “not like a date. Like if you wanted to book an appointment to see him about it. You know, like a therapist?” 

“Oh,” you mumble, immediately feeling stupid. “So what did you mean then?”

“Just that it takes two to fuck up a relationship most of the time.  You can’t fuck up something that wasn’t ready to be fucked up, you know? No one is perfect, we all have issues so no relationship is ever perfect and that’s not the fault of just one person.”

“Wow,” you exhale. His words sink in, a stark contrast against the internal monologue of shame and blame you had callously constructed. A differing perspective roaring in to shake your foundations. You try to reckon with it, the thought that it might not be all your fault, and it clamours and clangs against your brain in the worst way. In a way that you know it might be true but you’re not ready to accept it yet. 

“Did I say something wrong?” Mingyu asks, momentarily rendered insecure by your plunge into melancholic silence. 

“No, no,” you assure him, distantly amused by his immediate assumption that it might have been him that did something wrong. “It’s just…” you hesitate, unsure of how to word it. “I wasn’t expecting you to be so insightful.”

He snorts out a laugh, “thanks, I guess. I have my moments.” 

“No, no, I don’t mean that I think you’re like…incapable of insight, just…” you pause, trying to reformulate the thought in a way that doesn’t sound like an insult. “I’m just not used to getting reality checks like that from people I don’t really know that well.”

“Oh, okay,” he laughs again, in relief this time, and you feel the edge of tension you had been holding in your body ebb away. “Well, I mean it though,” he affirms, “I don’t think it means you’re going to die alone.”

“Okay, well,” you sigh, unsure where to follow this new proffered perspective, “thanks, I guess.”

“No problem,” he grins. “Your turn.”

“My turn?” You knit your brows in confusion, eliciting another laugh from your seatmate. “For what?”

“You answered my question, so it’s your turn to ask one,” he explains.

“I didn’t realise we were playing 20 questions,” you tease. The words leave your lips with a little more edge than you had intended and you wince. Why did you always sound so defensive? You glance at Mingyu and feel a slight sense of relief at the fact that he seemed not to have noticed the tone. 

“Well, if you don’t have any questions, I’m fine with being the hot, mysterious one in the house,” he winks and again you find yourself not hating how he looks when he does it. 

Still, you snort derisively in response. If only he knew how deeply not-mysterious he already was to you. “Hardly,” you reply. “Okay, fine. I have a question for you: why does The Notebook make you cry so much?”

Wide-eyed surprise ripples across his face, a tinge of red embarrassment colouring the tips of his ears, “who told you that?” he asks in a nervous half-whisper.

“Jeonghan might have mentioned it when I was moving in…” 

“Traitor,” he seethes, running a hand through his hair as he considers this revelation before answering you. “It’s sad,” he states plainly after a moment’s hesitation and you ‘tsk’, refusing the easy answer. 

“Lots of movies are sad, Mingyu. Why does this one in particular make you cry so much that I was warned never to watch it in the living room?”

He sighs again, heaves his chest in and out like an exasperated dog settling down for bed. You watch as he stares out over the river, wide brown eyes shimmering with the lights of the city, and wait for him to respond. You had never seen Wonwoo cry during a movie. You had barely seen Wonwoo cry at all. He kept his emotions held tight, whether for self-protection or because he really was just that steady you didn’t know, but Mingyu’s upfront expressiveness was a breath of fresh air. Seeing someone so open at every moment with how they were feeling made you feel a little bit less alone with your own rapid shifts in mood. Maybe you weren’t the broken one. 

“Fine,” he relents, “honestly, I know it’s corny. I know it’s a corny movie and it’s lame and dumb that an adult man with a job still bawls like a baby while watching it but I can’t help it. Seeing those two old people dying in bed together after reliving the tale of their love just gets me every single time. It’s a confusing mixture of sadness and hope and I have never been able to get through it without weeping.” 

“Wow,” you remark and he shakes his head. 

“Happy?” he huffs, again with an air of a disgruntled dog and you laugh.

“Very happy, thank you for sharing.” 

“Okay my turn,” he grins, leaning back against the bench once more, the wood groaning slightly under his weight as it shifts. 

“Good luck, movies don’t make me cry often.” 

“Well you’ve gotta have some embarrassing secret. Otherwise we’re on uneven ground, and I don’t like that.” 

“I’ve already told you something embarrassing,” you start to defend yourself but he shakes his head. Resolute. 

“What? About thinking you fuck everything up?” You nod and he laughs, “that’s not embarrassing, that’s normal. Everyone thinks they’re more fucked up than they are.” He shrugs and you again marvel at how casually he accepts the very thing that feels so earth-shaking to you. “Tell me your most embarrassing secret.”

“That’s not a question, it’s a demand.” you point out and he nods, considering the rebuttal. 

“Too broad? Okay, then what’s your favourite song?” 

“How is that supposed to be embarrassing?” you ask, aghast. 

“It’s not, I’m just curious. Not every question needs to be so heavy, you can get to know people through simpler things. Happy things,” he smiles again, coy, and your heart betrays you again with a flutter of wings against your chest. 

“I’m not sure,” you muse. He starts to protest but you cut him off before he can begin, “there are too many songs that I love to feel like I can narrow it down to just one all–time favourite. Too many things to consider.” 

“Like what?” 

“Like, what am I doing when I am listening to it? Is it a song I could listen to anytime, anywhere? Does that make it a favourite or just an easy listen? Is it a song that fills me with a swell of emotions? A favourite from high school that still makes me nostalgic? Or a recent song that I’ve played on repeat too many times to count? You see…too many things to consider.”

“Wow, you’re right,” he laughs again, “you really are an overthinker.” 

“Gee, thanks,” you scoff, rolling your eyes. 

“How about you just make me a playlist with all of the above and we’ll consider it answered?” he winks and you blink back at him, stunned to silence. Wonwoo never really got through the songs you would recommend to him, was Mingyu really going to go to the trouble of listening to an entire playlist? For his roommate? 

“Oh–okay,” you answer, unsure of what else to say. 

Silence descends for a moment, settling comfortably between you, and you glance around in surprise to find that most of the people that had been here when you arrived have since departed. How long had you been sitting on this bench talking?

As if reading your thoughts, Mingyu clears his throat. “It’s getting late,” he feigns a yawn, forearm flexing as he brings his hand up to cover his mouth, “but you have one more question to even it up before we start walking back home.”

You sit still, contemplating. While teasing him had been fun, an overwhelming part of you wants to really get to know him. To know what makes him tick. What thoughts and desires lurk in the depths of those puppy brown eyes. To find out exactly what it was about him that was drawing you in so much despite your (and Seulgi’s and Jeonghan’s) better judgement. 

“What did you want to be when you were a kid?” you ask finally. It feels like a silly question as soon as you ask it but you can’t take it back once it’s been spoken. And you do actually want to know the answer. 

“Is that your final question?” he asks and you hesitate but nod. You’re curious about what kind of kid he was. What his dreams had been before the demands of adulthood had set in. “Alright, but it’s silly,” he warns and you wait silently for his response despite it, “I wanted to own my own bakery.” 

“You wanted to own a bakery?” you parrot the response, surprised by his answer. “Really?” 

“I told you it was silly,” he smiles, voice a slight quiver. You hadn’t expected the answer, true, but it’s the nervousness around it that is really taking you by surprise. Like it’s kid Mingyu answering the question and not the 20-something year old adult you had bought you dinner. 

“No, no, it’s not silly, I just didn’t expect it,” you reassure him and the expression of embarrassment on his face melts back into neutrality. The wave of nerves slipping away into the ether. “Why didn’t you do it?” 

He shrugs, “my parents didn’t think it was a suitable career path for someone like me.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You bristle, feeling defensive on behalf of the kid he once was. 

“I never asked for clarification,” he laughs. “Just went to school for business like they suggested. Jokes on them, though, I can still make a mean sourdough.” 

“What can’t you do?” you mumble, intending the comment to be unheard but clearly failing as Mingyu throws his head back with a laugh before getting to his feet. 

“Well, what about you?” he asks as you join him and you both head back down the path towards the main road. “What was your childhood dream?”

“I always wanted to be an artist,” you say, “and I sort of am doing that now just in a more corporate-friendly way. Career was the one aspect of life that I always felt I had a handle on. There was no guesswork. It was just me involved.” 

“Your parents didn’t have any different thoughts as to what they wanted you to do?” he asks, a slight note of surprise colouring his voice. 

“Not really, no,” you shrug, “they were pretty supportive, honestly. I think the only things they really cared about was that I got an education and was able to pay for rent and food.” 

“That’s lucky, it’s nice to have such supportive parents.”

“Yeah, I guess it is,” you nod. It had never been something you had actively thought about, just taken for granted and assumed it was sort of the same for everyone. You make a mental note to call your parents soon and catch up as you and Mingyu leave the park and the river disappears behind you. 

“Would you ever bake something for me?” you ask, matching Mingyu’s stride as you take a turn down the block towards home. 

“That depends,” he replies, amusement clear in his voice.

“On what?” 

“On whether or not you want to hang out again in the future,” he shrugs, feigning nonchalance. You see a hint of blush reddening the tips of his ears again and it makes you wonder. Was it just the slight chill in the air causing it?

“Well, we do live together so I think that’s almost inevitable,” you laugh, trying to brush the niggling feeling off with an assurance that you did not feel. 

“True,” he concedes, “then I guess I will. Are you more of a sweet or savory person?” 

“That depends,” you reply, a small grin turning up the corners of your lips. 

“Overthinking pastries now too?” 

“No,” you laugh, all lingering feelings of defensiveness gone from you. “It depends on what you’re better at making.” 

“Oh, I’m good at it all,” he replies, voice smooth–silk slipping over mahogany–as he holds open the door to the condo complex for you. You glance at him, eyes meeting his in the dim light of the lobby, and study him for a moment. He’s smiling, cool and casual, but there’s a seriousness hiding in the depths of his expression that you can’t quite unravel. It draws you in, curiouser and curiouser, until you find yourself face to face with a crossroads. Two paths diverge in the yellow woods of your mind and the only thing that remains is to choose.  

“Then I’ll take it all,” you reply after a breath, thoughts slipping into place. Threshold crossed, decision made. You step into the lobby and head towards the elevator leaving Mingyu to trail behind. 

.

.

.

The condo is blessedly quiet when you arrive upstairs; everyone else scattered throughout the city with Friday night plans. The absence of Jeonghan in particular is a relief, you knew that no matter what the context was, if he saw you return with Mingyu at this time of night you would be primed for some form of lecture or another. Whether verbal or simply that knowing stare he likes to give you when he thinks you’re being stupid.

That silent cloud of judgement would have been especially intrusive tonight as you step in through the front door barely clinging onto the tenuous air of bravado you had conjured up in the lobby downstairs. It would have shaken your resolve to follow this thought of intrigue towards Mingyu and thrust you right back into your torrential thoughts once more, spinning haphazardly between mourning over what was lost and what might not ever be.  

Instead you stand with shaky confidence and a pounding in your chest as you bid Mingyu goodnight, savouring that look of intrigue you’re sure is mirrored in his own expression as you close your bedroom door for the night and bar any doubt from creeping in behind you. 

You listen through the walls as his own door clicks shut before rummaging through the unpacked duffel bag in the corner of your room. You dig through unsorted paperwork, unopened mail, random knick knacks you had found no home for yet until your fingers grasp the object you were seeking.

Sleek, black silicone emerges from the bag and you glance behind you as if Mingyu might be standing there, ready to chastise you for your impure thoughts. 

You stand up, hesitating, evaluating the vibrator as it sits like a brick in your palm. You had only used it once, years ago, after buying it at a convention with Seulgi before it ended up buried deep in the recesses of your drawer. At the time your sex life had been consistent and satisfying–it was early days for you and Wonwoo and the excitement and novelty of having each other at your fingertips for the whims of the moment had kept you too busy to even remember that you had the toy stored away in the first place. It wasn’t until you were packing to move out that you rediscovered it.

You hesitate for a second before thinking ‘fuck it, I paid like $200 for this, I’m gonna get some use out of it’ and slipping out of your clothes and into your bed. 

You try to set the mood in your mind, fingers swirling idly over your bare skin as you flip through mental images of celebrities, movie scenes, fantasies that you used to use to get in the mood. Anything to deepen that pressure that burned quietly inside of you. None of your old tricks produce results and you sigh, ready to give up on the activity completely, before you feel the distinct thud of Mingyu’s headboard against the wall. 

You imagine Mingyu: what is he doing? Maybe sitting on the edge of his bed, scrolling through Instagram, or maybe he’s under his covers too. Maybe he’s having the same thoughts as you? 

You follow this thought where it takes you, back to that night the other week. Back to the low sound of his moaning carried through the drywall and plaster, the thudding of his headboard against your wall, back to that yawning pit in your stomach that felt like it might swallow you whole at any second. Your hand traces the path of the scene playing out in your mind, blazing a trail down your chest, stomach, and finally to the aching space between your thighs. 

You recall the weight of Mingyu’s arm pressed against your back on the park bench–steady and solid. The sound of his voice and laughter muffling your gasp of surprise as you flick the vibrator on and jump at the sudden noise filling your room. 

You flick it back off immediately, worrying that the distinctive buzzing sound would carry itself through the cover of your blankets and body and make it through the proven-thin walls towards Mingyu’s ears. He would know for sure you were in here thinking about him, fantasizing about his lips on your neck. The thought of discovery adds a confusing stab of guilt to the knotting in your guts but you do your best to squash it as it pops up. What exactly were you doing wrong? You were tired of denying yourself pleasure out of fear of other people’s judgements or shame. You flick the vibrator back on, this time prepared for the noise, and dig the object deeper between your thighs. 

Maybe part of you wants him to hear you–wants him to know what you were doing alone in the dark in the bedroom next to him. Maybe, in this alternative timeline, he knocks softly on your door. His brown eyes rake over your naked body, bared to him like a gift prepared just for him. His sweatpants strain with the pressure of his bulge as his blood travels lower, and lower. Filling him with the desire as it fills you now. He steps forward, wavering at the threshold of your bed and asks, voice so low it plucks at the strings of your core, to join you. To help you release this coil of tension that had made its home inside of you, growing bigger and hungrier every single day since running into him half-naked in the kitchen that first night. Maybe he’s been running through this same scenario every night before bed, hand gripping his cock as it pulses in his hand, sweat beading his brow. 

Alternative timeline or not, the thought itself is all that you need to push you over the edge as you move the vibrator against your clit, finding the right rhythm of pressure, the right balance of relief, to feed the beast of desire crying open-mouthed inside of you. To have your legs shaking and your core pulsing with waves of pleasure no longer denied. You cry out, muffling the sound with the back of your free hand, and for the first time in years it isn't Wonwoo's face clear in your mind as you reach your climax.

© 2024, neoneun-au. all rights reserved.

―AUTHOR’S NOTE: i cant link them here, but please find the series masterlist and other chapters on my blog. i would love to know your thoughts on the story so far !

[ministerlo]

Like Father, Like Son

I'm sitting on the couch, reading a fantasy book I liked, completely absorbed by it. It’s the weekend, and I'm enjoying your time alone at home, as usual.

Suddenly, I hear the front door open. It could only be my mother and… "him". Your mom’s new boyfriend.

I don’t like him at all. He often takes advantage of your mom, and I don’t know why she still keeps him around.

"Hi Mom" I say cheerfully, I adored my mom, she raised me all by herself after dad left us, the only problem with her was that she had gotten with. "Hey punk" Steve, he wore his dumb smirk as he took off his shoes.

"Hi sweetie." mom speaks to you with a smile.

"Where'd you guys go." I say trying to sound as polite as possible to Steve in front of my mother, she didn't need the extra stress of knowing I didn't like her boyfriend.

Mom goes to the kitchen to put down her stuff. Steve, on the other hand, walks towards me, and sits down right next to me. He makes sure to sit so close to me that he’s practically touching me. "We just, walked through the town a bit." he says as he puts his arm around me.

I looked at the time, "Wait, mom don't you have a meeting soon?"

She looked at the time "Omg, I need to run, be good for Steve sweetie" as she rushed off to go to her meeting on time.

As I watched her leave I finally snapped at Steve "Get your hands off me."

"Why would I?" He smirks deviously.

"What do you want?" I asked irraitedly

He laughs, and pulls me closer to him. He’s now holding my shoulder firmly with one hand, almost like he was trapping me down to the couch. "I just want to spend some time with you, that’s all. We never got to have one-on-one chats, you know." He says with a cocky smile.

"Why would I need to spend time with you?" I asked raising my voice.

"Aww don't you want to spend time with your good ol' step dad?" he said grinning from ear to ear

"You're not my dad!" I screamed, you're just a rebound for my mom.

"Ohh, that's gonna change soon." He said under his breath, I could barely hear him, I glared at him for that but my last mistake was looking at his eyes.

"What's wrong with your eyes." I asked head suddenly getting increasingly dizzy.

"Hmm, what?" He said in a teasing tone.

"Your eyes, they're, spirals." At this point I could barely form a coherent sentence my head hurt so much, it felt like a million tiny needles were stabbed into my brain, not only that it felt like a fog was in my head stopping all thoughts from being processed.

He laughs, and looks back at me with his hypnotising eyes. "Yeah, they’re pretty cool aren’t they?" He chuckles as he looks me deep into the eyes, almost like he’s staring down my soul.

"I-I feel weird." Stammering I try to get rid of the fog that was incasing my head.

He continues to stare down into my eyes, still holding me close to him "What do you feel? Explain it to me." He says while chuckling, as if he knows exactly what I feeling but wants me to say it out loud.

"Head's foggy." I could barely hear myself over the hammering over my head.

He chuckles yet again, seeing that I was slowly getting affected by his eyes "Anything else? Do you feel dizzy? Or dumber?"

I couldn't think to refute or shout at him, I could barely speak over the indescribable pain that I was feeling, all of a sudden my body felt like there were weights attached to them. "Dizzy, body feels weird as well"

He smirks, seeing how quickly the effects were taking over "Oh really, come over here." He raises his armpits "maybe this will make you feel better."

I couldn't refute him, my body wanted someone to anchor me and think so I obediently sniffed his armpit, all of a sudden everything felt so pleasurable. As I mindlessly sniffed at his armpits I tried to resist the urge to lap at his armpits.

"That's a good boy, just follow your instincts, don't fight them." He said smirking, he could see the changes that were occurring to me, my hair for starters turned a more dirty blond and messy, he could tell that my face shape was changing, becoming much more angular and chiseled, he also saw that I was growing much more body hair, especially in my armpits.

Since he told me not to fight my urges I decide to start lapping up the sweat, his musky, and manly scent was intoxicating to me. As I continued to obediently lap and sniff my changes were accelerated, my muscles becoming more toned and defined, looking like that of a football star, my feet grew larger, I grew a few inches, both in my dick as well as my height. As the changes progressed I started to produce my own manly and musky sweat, not only that but the musk started to slowly turn me on.

"That's a good boy." Steve told me before he pulled me out of his armpit I whined. "I see, your muscles feel heavy. Your body feels strong, your head hurts and you feel dizzy. Is that right?"

I don't know why but I felt the urge to be obedient rather than defiant to a person I once despised "Yes"

He grabs my chin with his hand, forcing me to look into his eyes even more as his smirk becomes bigger "Can you feel your mind getting empty? Feeling slower than usual? Maybe even a little dumber? Or can you still think fine?"

"I can think, but my memories are emptying out" I obediently answered.

He notices that I told him that my memories are starting to disappear, as he continues to stare at me intently in the eyes as I starting to go dumb "Good, good. Let them fade away. You don’t need them anyway. You’ll be given new ones soon, so why even bother with them? Just drop them. Let them fade away from you mind as you slowly feel your intelligence and free-will go lower and lower…"

I suddenly felt a defiant surge as I struggled "What, are you doing to me"

He chuckles as he takes notice of my slow reaction and confusion. It was cute to him that I was so clueless "You still haven’t figured it out? You’re really that dumb, uh?" He says while he slowly moves his hand up to my head, and begins petting me as if I was a pet.

"I- no dad, wait what?!" I gasped at my accidental slip at calling him dad. "I my memories, you're not my biological dad but are at the same time"

He grins as he sees thatI'm slowly realising what’s happening. He knows I'm getting close to the truth, and he’s enjoying every second of it "That’s right kid, you’re almost there." He says as he continues to pet and caress my hair while staring deep into my eyes

"Are my memories-" before I could finish I was cut off.

He grins from ear to ear as he hears you say that"That’s right, your memories are slowly getting replaced. Soon, you won’t remember anything from before. Nothing. You will fully think I’m your new real dad. And you’ll be my new son."

"Why do I feel so sore dad." my memories were already starting to be replaced and I was already accepting the new ideas that were implanted in my head.

He laughs and looks me up and down "Do you know why your muscles are so sore? It’s because they’ve grown. You’re so much bigger than before, and your muscles are so much stronger and for that strength your intelligence and free-will have been slowly disappearing. You don’t need them, you don’t need to think, just being the good son that I tell you to be."

"Yeah just be a good son, wait- no what about mom!" as I was accepting my new fate I remembered my mom and was able to break free.

He scoffs as I mention my mom "What about her? She’s not here, she’s not important. To you, I’m the most important person, right? You only listen to me, right? Obedience, love and loyalty is the only thing you feel for me. Right?"

"Yeah." I said back in his control.

He grins, seeing how obedient I've become. He loves having control over me. I’ve become so dumb and submissive, it’s so amusing to him "That’s good, kid. You don’t need your mom, you don’t need anything or anyone. My control over you is absolute. You only exist to please and obey me. Isn’t that right?"

As the mindless haze fully set in my cock grew rock hard, all the thoughts slipping from my head, increased my everything, my libido, my strength, my muscles and my pleasure. These thoughts also made it so that I had lost all of my queerness, thinking only traditionally without a single liberal thought. "Yeah I'm your good obedient son." I said as I chuckle dumbly.

He grins and ruffles my hair again. He feels so satisfied that I’ve become so weak-willed and obedient. It’s almost intoxicating to him to have such control over you "That’s a good boy. A good, obedient, dumb son. Exactly the kid I’ve always wanted. So strong and muscular, yet so dumb and easy to control and manipulate. You’ll do anything I say, right?"

"Yes dad." I said.

"Good, let's start replacing your memories then. From now on you're Kyle, my ideal son, you’re the star quarterback. The most popular, well liked, and most muscular guy in school. Everyone looks up to you, and all the girls want to be with you." He stated.

"Now one more thing, you'll do it for me won't you, since you're my good dumb and obedient son." He asked knowing full well that I would say yes.

Just as he expected I nodded.

"That’s good, kid. Now, here’s what I want you to do. I want you to completely, and utterly forget about your mom. Right now."

"Mom?" I asked questioningly.

He grins and looks, satisfied with my reaction "That’s right, I want you to forget about your mom permanently. Never think about her ever again. She’s not important to you anymore. All you should think about is me and obeying me. You only exist to please me, and that’s all you need. Got it?"

As the commands set in I replied "What mom?" completely clueless of my last attachment to my previous life.

He grins widely, the satisfaction of seeing me forget my mom growing more and more "That’s right. Mom? What mom. There is no mom. Just me, right? Your only focus and thought is pleasing me. You’ll forget that you ever had a mom. As far as you’re concerned, I have always been your only parent. You only listen to me, nobody else, right?"

"Of course dad." I was so deep into the commands I only remembered to be his perfect son, dumb, sweaty, muscle-bound, obedient, straight and catholic.

He snaps his fingers as the trance ends looking at me lovingly, enjoying just how much far I've become, from the previous nerd that hated him and didn't even consider him a step-dad to this good, dumb, muscle-bound jock that loved his dad.

"yoh, dad, you coming to my football game this Friday?" I said, completely unaware of the previous tranced state I was in and the past life that I lived out.

"Of course." He said smiling, loving the good son you had become.

As we chatted the door unlocked, revealing to us the lady that was my previous mom.

[ashwhowrites]

Yay!

Well, it's a bit similar to one you have made before - that reader offer Eddie a friends with benefits/rebound situation after Chrissy rejects him. But soon she falls for him and to protect herself she starts to avoid him and when he asks her why she lies (sort of) and says she's in love with someone and can't continue their arrangement because of that and that hurts Eddie way more than Chrissy's rejection did. And then he talks with someone else in the gang about it and they're like "yeah, she's in love with you, you idiot!" and ... happy ending? :D

Haha, I definitely see what you are doing here. FWB but a happy ending in a different fic...I respect that. I'll give you a happy ending!!!

Not proofread

Little bits of smut

~~~

Eddie and Y/N were not close friends, they did not know each other well, just students passing in the hall. They were in different crowds, she was popular and he was in hellfire. Those crowds did not mix.

Y/N wouldn't admit it out loud but she found Eddie incredibly attractive. His long, dark, and curly hair. The images of yanking his hair as he rested between her thighs. His sexy smirk, and the way he oozed confidence. The way he walked down the halls, not caring who looked at him. But she always was. Biting her lip as she pictured his body underneath his hellfire shirt. Craving to feel the chain on his pants in her fingertips. Hear his deep and rough voice in her ear, praising her for taking his cock so deep.

"If you keep staring, you might drool." Chrissy teased, nudging Y/N as they stood at her locker.

"I do not drool!" Y/N gasped, trying to secretly check her chin in the mirror.

~~~

When Eddie stopped her, Chrissy was rushing to the gym, running late to practice.

"Oh hey Eddie," Chrissy rushed out, trying to walk around him.

Eddie quickly grabbed her arm. "Sorry, Can I ask you something?"

"Oh um, yeah, just please make it quick. Y/N is going to kill me for being late." Chrissy laughed

"Okay yeah. I was just wondering if you wanted to go out on a date sometime?" Eddie asked, nervously playing with the rings on his fingers.

Chrissy was surprised, she never knew Eddie was interested in her. But she did know that her best friend was into him. And there was no way she'd step on Y/N's toes like that.

"Oh Eddie, I am so sorry but I no. I have to go." Chrissy rushed out, racing to the gym.

~~~

Y/N was a little sad when Chrissy said Eddie asked her out. Y/N never went after Eddie because she believed that he just wasn't into the popular girls, but he was.

This was her opening.

~~~

Y/N made sure to remind herself that Eddie liked Chrissy, asking him on a date out of nowhere would look too suspicious. He had a crush on her best friend, but Y/N just had an attraction to Eddie. She didn't like him like that....well that's the lie she told herself.

After a week passed, Eddie looked like a kicked puppy whenever he looked over at Chrissy. Y/N felt bad for him, rejection always hurts. But she noticed his confidence took a hit. He didn't walk with a smirk, or his head high anymore. He was insecure.

Maybe she could just help him with his confidence.

And maybe help get over her crush.

~~~

Eddie was leaving Hellfire, heading to his van when he heard a girl calling his name.

He turned around confused, making eye contact with Y/N, Chrissy's best friend.

"Oh hey Y/N," He smiled politely, he wasn't sure why she was coming up to him. Probably to make fun of him for asking out her best friend.

"Hey Munson, so I heard about Chrissy and-" She started, but Eddie cut her off.

"Look I don't need any bitchy comments." Eddie spat out, nodding to her as he turned back around.

"Wait no," Y/N started again, grabbing his elbow and turning him around.

"I have a small little question for you," Y/N said nervously. Eddie watched as she rolled on her heels, less confident than when she first walked up.

"Yeah?" Eddie asked

"I know that being rejected can really sting, and sometimes make us insecure. I recently went through a breakup and have been feeling alone....I find you extremely attractive, always have, and I was wondering if maybe we could be rebounds for each other? Hang out, chill with each other, and you know have sex?"

And that's how Y/N and Eddie found themselves in a friends-with-benefits situation.

~~~

If anyone told Eddie two months ago he'd have Y/N underneath him, naked, panting, and begging for his cock, no way would he believe them.

It's been two months of amazing sex, drinking on his couch, sharing joints in the woods, and soaking in each other. The physical attraction was so strong between them. Doesn't matter where they were, they would have their hands on each other in seconds.

"fuck baby, look at how good you take my cock." Eddie moaned, his lips right against her ear. Thrusting into her from behind, his hands on her hips, his skin smacking into hers as he leaned over her back.

Y/N loved hearing it every single time. And he knew it. She could feel the smirk against her ear, the way he fucked her just a tad harder, and his chuckle travel through his chest that was against her back.

"Gonna cum huh? Be a good girl and cum on my fucking cock"

~~~

Y/N screwed herself over. She did not get over her crush, she started falling for him instead. She craved him all the time, and not just sex. She didn't sleep nearly as well alone as she did when he wrapped his arm around her. Her head rested on his chest.

The way they cuddled on the couch as they shared a beer. The way he'd hold the bottle and press it to her lips, watching as she swallowed the cold beer. How he'd let her rest her head on his shoulder and start to doze off. Twisting her hair in his hands as he watched the tv.

The way they laughed over everything when they got high. Scooting closer to each other after each puff. She'd end up in his lap, playing with his curls as he ranted about some movie. Her eyes stared into his.

But she did help his confidence. His smirk was bigger than ever. Walking through the halls, a wink sent her way whenever he passed her. He brushed off anything Jason had to throw his way. Rolling his eyes as he threw his arm over Y/N's shoulders and directed them to class.

Half of her plan worked, but the part that failed was starting to hurt.

~~~

"It's been two months, are you ever going to tell him?" Chrissy asked

"No, I can't. I'm his rebound." Y/N sighed. No one to blame but herself, she put them in this position.

"Maybe he's starting to fall for you too. I mean come on, you guys do more than just sex. You spend time together, fall asleep together, and basically go on dates. Just talk to him." Chrissy encouraged

"Okay"

~~~

Y/N did talk to him but left out half the truth.

"Wait, you want to stop?" Eddie asked, his brown eyes scanning over Y/N's face. He had a feeling this day would come.

"Yeah I just fell in love with someone and I can't do this to either of us, anymore." She explained. All she had to say was that Eddie was the one she fell for, but she was too scared.

"I mean if that is what you want." Eddie shrugged. He wasn't surprised, but the rejection he felt was even worse than Chrissy's rejection.

He didn't fight for her

It was just casual sex

"Is that okay?" She asked

"Yeah whatever, good luck with whatever his face is." Eddie rushed out, grabbing his backpack as he got off the bench, walking the trail out of the woods to the parking lot.

~~~

Just like that, his confidence was gone, even worse than last time. His lips didn't curve in any type of way except downwards. He passed through the halls fast and quietly. His head down and his eyes on his shoes.

The kicked puppy looked returned. His puppy eyes watched her, looking away fast when she looked up. She hated how sad he looked. She only saw him smile and laugh.

~~~

"What's going on with you two?" Steve asked, leaning against the counter as Eddie stood against it.

Both boys looked as Y/N searched through the aisles.

"She called it off, something about being in love with someone." Eddie shrugged, trying to sound unbothered.

"It's obvious she's in love. She has that lovely look and dopey smile." Steve chuckled.

Eddie could feel jealousy burning in him, who the hell was this guy? Even Steve could tell? Was it that obvious all along and Eddie was just her passing some fun time.

Well of course he was, she only asked for sex. What did he expect? Her to just fall in love with him because of sex like he did?

She looked up and saw him, he went to offer a small smile and wave but she quickly put her head down.

Well, that stung.

~~~

And it kept happening. Whenever she saw him she'd run off and avoid him.

Chrissy would give him a sorry look and run after her.

They spent countless nights together and now she won't look at him.

Now he needed a rebound for a rebound.

~~~

A few weeks passed and Eddie still hasn't talked to her. She has been avoiding him and he started to do the same.

Chrissy was hosting a huge after-party for one of the basketball games. The whole school was invited basically so Eddie figured why not go, get drunk, forget about Y/N, and move on. Robin was invited and dragged Steve along. Eddie was thankful they were going and offered to drive.

He hated that the second he walked in his eyes immediately saw her. She looked gorgeous. She was laughing with Chrissy.

Eddie wondered if the guy she was in love with was here. His heart hurt, she was wearing one of his shirts, with a pair of jean shorts, and sneakers. So casual and perfect. But she wore his shirt that would probably end up on someone else's floor.

"I need a drink." Eddie groaned

~~~

Which turned into many drinks....many drinks

Which led to him locking lips with a random girl

Out of all the people that had to smack into them on accident just had to be her.

"OH, I AM SO SORRY!" Y/N screamed over the music, embarrassed as she just smacked into a couple making out in the hallway. She was coming out of the bathroom, rushing to get back to Chrissy, and didn't even notice them.

The two pulled away, her eyes connecting with familiar brown eyes. She felt sick to her stomach.

"It's alright." The girl replied but neither did Y/N or Eddie look away from each other.

Eddie swallowed the lump in his throat, about to open his mouth, but Y/N ran.

Steve appeared behind her with a look in his eyes.

~~~

Y/N was on the front lawn, taking deep breaths. Sitting on the cold curb.

It was fair for him to move on

She needed to be fine with that

"Mind if I sit?" Eddie asked, she looked up as he nodded to the spot next to her. She gave a small smile and moved over.

"Thanks" He whispered, sitting next to her.

"So I had a talk with a friend, and he pointed something out to me," Eddie said, looking right at her.

"What's that?" Y/N asked

"I'm the guy you are in love with," Edde admitted

"Something like that," Y/N whispered, a sad chuckle leaving her lips.

"Why didn't you just say that?" Eddie asked

"I was too scared. I offered to be your rebound, and I didn't want to scare you off with something more serious." Y/N shrugged, a small smile on her lips as she looked over at him.

"I can understand that. I think it's time I'm honest too. I fell for you too, and you rejecting us hurt way more than Chrissy and that's when I knew I was in love with you. Being away from you has hurt like hell. And I would have never kissed that random girl if I knew you loved me. I thought you loved someone else and I couldn't handle it. I'm sorry you had to see that" Eddie admitted. His heart raced as her eyes grew soft, her cheeks lifting as a smile took over her face.

"Thank you for the apology. I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I guess we are both scared idiots who didn't want to say how we felt. I thought you might have still been hung up on Chrissy." Y/N confessed.

"Chrissy left my mind the night you came up to me, sweetheart. It's you and it'll always be you. I love you." Eddie smiled, scooting closer to her. His hand rested on top of hers softly.

"I love you too." Y/N smiled, turning her hand to hold his.

Eddie went to lean in, lips inches away from hers when she pulled back.

Eddie looked at her confused.

"Nah uh, you just tongued a random chick, and drunk as hell. We'll try when you are sober." Y/N giggled.

Eddie's stomach flipped at the sound.

"That is a great idea.....remind me you are mine when I'm sober too." Eddie joked, laughing with her as she rested her head on his shoulder.

"Although, I don't think I'll forget this moment," Eddie said quietly, kissing her forehead.

"I won't either." Y/N sighed.

Tags!

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @slightlyvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @manyfandomsfanvergent @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila

[ashprince-of-bel-air]

One More Drink.

A/N: I've been thinking about an older Eddie Munson a lot lately, so much so that I wrote this as I got wine drunk the other night.

Notes: Eddie is in his 40s, reader in their mid 20s. You meet Eddie at a dive bar in town after your date stood you up out of nowhere, you spend the night in Eddie's company until you end up nearly passed out drunk.

"Fucking arsehole" You muttered under your breath as you walked into the bar, your date failed to show, and you were pissed off. The bar was a dive, its clientele was mostly middle-aged men who lived nearby and had drank there for years. You did not care though, as long as you could get drunk you were satisfied. Signalling the bartender, you ordered a whiskey and a very large glass of wine. You downed the glass of whiskey in one gulp and cradled the glass of wine, stroking the rim of the glass with your finger, contemplating why you had been stood up.

Eddie watched you as you stormed in, he came here every Friday night and had never seen you before. You were young and you were alluring, the alternative style you had reminded him of his own youth, 20 years ago you would have been his type. Eddie shook his head softly trying not to look at you, he was twice your age, you obviously would not be interested in him, he could not help himself from speaking to you though.

Eddie chuckled as he saw you down the whiskey. "it's his loss sweetheart" You lifted your head up to see who made that comment, your eyes settling on the middle-aged rocker. You smirked at him and chuckled under your breath, you were flattered by the comment, he was an attractive man.

"Oh, are you offering?" you retorted playfully admiring his rugged face, as you looked at him you could not help but imagine feeling his rough stubble against your thighs. Mentally you shook those thoughts from your mind for now, you did not want a rebound from your missing date.

"Thanks.." you chuckle softly and return to looking at your drink, you did not think that you were overly beautiful but it did sting that you were stood up by your date for no reason. You gave the bartender a nod and ordered another shot of whisky, you would welcome anything that would drown the night away at this point. Downing your second glass of whisky made you shudder; you heard a comment from the aging rocker a few seats away. "You might want to calm down sweetheart unless you want someone to carry you home".

Eddie chuckled at your response; he was loving your flirty nature. "I just don't want to see a beautiful woman such as yourself be caught alone" He swigged his beer and called the bartender for another one. You were curious about this man, he was exactly your type, covered in tattoos with long hair, plus you definitely had a weakness for older men. How could you resist him? You smirked and stood up, moving to sit at the chair next to him, you could feel his eyes on you as you sat down, it aroused you somewhat, spurring you on to speak to him.

"Nice to meet you chief, I'm Y/N" You gave your best smile to him, wanting to impress him, you decided that you at least wanted the attention of someone tonight after your date ghosted you.

"I'm Eddie, darling" he smiled and lifted his drink in a playful cheer, he was happy that you were speaking to him, he was 20 years your senior but wanted you nonetheless, he hoped that he would not come across as a pervert as he stared at you, even though he felt like one. You were just perfection to him, you reminded him of his days as a rocker, dressed in all black and angry at the world. "Y/N. A pretty name for a pretty lady" His voice was deep and charming; you could not help but roll your eyes and smile at him.

You could hear his chuckle vibrate from his throat. "Same as you sweetheart, drowning my sorrows." Eddie smiled as he downed the rest of his beer, signalling the bartender once again to pour another one. A chuckle emanated from your throat, you looked him up and down whilst he ordered his drink, you were definitely starting to feel better about being stood up tonight.

Eddie? You thought the name suited him, he was at least twice your age, but you loved it, you did not want to admit that you had daddy issues as you continued to flirt with him. You sipped your wine as you stared at him from the corner of your eye, his stubble was speckled with white hair and his face was creased with lines showing that he had lived an interesting life, you almost groaned as you noticed them. Keeping your composure as you refrained from downing the entire glass, you wanted the alcohol to keep you calm and flirty with him.

"So, what are you doing here tonight?" You gauge Eddie's response, hoping that it would not be an offensive question.

The night drew on and you hadn't noticed the time, you were both so enthralled in each other's company, exchanging flirty comments and soft strokes of your hands upon Eddie's body, each 'accidental' touch sent sparks flying through your fingers, further igniting the arousal within you. Eddie's eyes flitted to your plump lips, enjoying the way you tried not to bite your lips whenever he made a suggestive comment, he wanted nothing more than to feel his rough hands on your delicate skin and to mark you as his, silently thankful that whatever asshole you were supposed to see, had ghosted you, making you come to this bar and drink the night away. Drink you did, you did not keep track of how much you had actually drunk but you were definitely starting to feel the effects of it, the wine you kept ordering was causing a soft blush to form on your face as you could feel the buzz of alcohol.

Eddie felt your eyes rake over him, catching your wanting stare from the corner of his eye. His lips twitched as he tried not to smile at the thought of you wanting him as much as he wanted you. It had been a while since he properly flirted with a woman, especially one that was so much younger than him, he pushed any negative thoughts out of his mind, telling himself that he still had some good moves in him and that he could do this. He hooked his foot beneath the bar of your chair and pulled you closer to him, smirking at your surprise as you giggled softly and tried not to spill your drink. Your giggle was like music to his ears, the sight of you giggling definitely contrasted with your outward appearance but that only spurred him on further.

A bell rang loudly throughout the bar causing you to look at the clock, the barman was signalling that it was time to close. Holy shit was it that late? You wondered to yourself, shocked that it was almost 3 am, you had been here all night talking and flirting with Eddie. You did not want to go and leave his company, and at the same time you were scared to ask for his number or if he wanted to meet you again, maybe you were just a distraction for the night, unaware that Eddie felt the exact same way as you watched him finish the remainder of his beer.

"Well sweetheart, it's been a lovely evening" He smiled and stood up from the stool, placing his empty bottle on the bar. He rubbed the back of his neck nervously; he couldn't believe he was going to ask this. "I'd like to see you again…. If you're interested obviously" He watched you, anxious and wanting to gauge your reaction, mentally cursing himself for even asking in the first place, why would you be interested in seeing him again, he was twice your age.

The nervous way he rubbed his neck and looked down as he asked you made you blush and smile widely, you absolutely wanted to see him again, you began to hop off your chair and reply "I'd love to see you ag - " You stumble as you stand up, catching you off guard, you had definitely had more alcohol than you thought. You place your hand on the bar to stead your uneasy legs, gripping it for dear like to keep you upright. Eddie's arms went out instinctively to try and catch you before you steadied yourself, chuckling slightly at your wobbly demeanour.

"When I said someone might have to carry you home I didn't mean it literally" His deep playful chuckle caused you to blush, desperately trying not to imagine your body in his arms, holding you close against his chest.

"No, I'm fine…" your speech was slightly slurred as you tried to focus on staying stood up, feeling your body sway back and forth, blinking rapidly to keep yourself awake and alert. You had no idea how you would get home; you weren't even sure that you would be able to open the door to your apartment at this point.

Eddie's smile was soft as he watched you sway gently against the bar; he took your free hand in his and pulled you softly towards him. "C'mon sweetheart, I don't live far from here and I don't reckon you are in any fit state to be left alone" You nod softly at his comment, you knew he was right, there was no way you could navigate yourself anywhere in this state. You stumbled towards him and felt his calloused hand hook your arm around his neck, you almost wanted to moan when he snaked his other arm around your waist, gripping you softly making sure that you would not fall.

The walk to his trailer was quiet, you were attempting to concentrate on moving your feet in a straight line and trying not to fall over, not understanding that the only reason you were even standing up at all was because Eddie was holding you upright. Eddie shook his head softly at you trying to walk, he remembered when he was your age and had gotten himself into many a drunken state, you made him feel young again tonight which made him smile, he could not remember the last time he had felt this alive.

He lifted you up in his strong arms, carrying you bridal style to his bedroom, you were now fully asleep after finally giving in to the alcohol in your body. Your breathing was soft as Eddie gently placed you upon his unmade bed, he smiled watching you seem so at peace, it was a nice contrast to the anger he saw on your face when you entered the bar all those hours ago. He removed your shoes and placed them on the floor, he had fallen asleep in his boots many times when he was drunk and each time he would wake with sores on his feet, you would likely be embarrassed anyway come the morning, so he did not want to add to your discomfort. As he left you there sleeping he made sure to leave a glass of water on the bedside table, he knew full well that you would want it in the morning. Taking one last look at your sleeping figure to make sure you were alright he made his way to the sofa down the hall. He let his body fall onto it with a sigh, sure he wanted you to come back to his trailer with him, this was just a bit different from what he had in mind. He closed his eyes and let sleep take him, his last thoughts were him hoping that you would want to see him again after you had sobered up, he knew that he would not be able to get you off of his mind for a long time.

It wasn't long until you reached the door to his trailer, you would have both gotten there sooner but trying to keep you from tumbling over was slightly time-consuming. As you both walked through the door Eddie removed your arm from around his neck, his hand was still gripping your waist as he did not want you to fall into his trailer. You dropped your bag on a nearby table as soon as you were helped inside, wanting desperately to be unencumbered by it. The trailer wasn't pristine, but it wasn't filthy, it definitely showed signs of a man living by himself in it for years, the soft smell of whisky and cigarette smoke was strangely comforting to you in your drunken state, it made your eyelids feel even heavier as you tried to stay awake, slumping against Eddie's body. The feeling of your body against his caused his heart to flutter slightly, he could feel you leaning against him, knowing that you were fighting a losing battle to stay awake at this point.

[textualdesires]

Rebound

Xavier Thorpe x gn!telekinetic!Reader, mentions of Rowan Laslow x Reader (pre-death)

Xavier does not want to be your rebound. Except being your rebound is not half as bad with what comes with it.

I love this work, I gotta say. Reader is popular and with the nightshades. This is so adorable and my heart aches for both of these soft boys. Also completely gn! smut so it can be read as male, female or any other identity!

Categories: angst, fluff, mutual pining, smut with a plot?

Warnings: mild swearing, mentions of blood and murder, oral (m receiving), penetration, nudity, marking, size kink, use of powers in the bedroom, spit ig?, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!)

Enjoy!

————————————————————————————————————

Your heart ached as you once again laid on his bed, tears streaming down your face. It’s been a few weeks since Rowan left. Or supposedly left. You knew he wouldn’t just leave. Wouldn’t just leave you behind.

You and Rowan had always been an odd couple. You were a popular telekinetic, had mastered your craft early. And he was the asthmatic kid, the outcast of outcasts.

You had first met him at the nightshades. Yoko, one of the first people you clicked with, had dragged you along soon after you joined Nevermore. He didn’t seem to fit in even there.

There was a deeper connection the two of you shared. Like even your powers were connected. Like you were meant to be together. He was rooted deep in your head. In your soul. In your head.

It had become a habit of yours to go to his dorm when you missed him. You would lie in his sheets, hold them close for as long as they still smelled like him. You didn’t come as often nowadays, but when it all became too much, you still did. It’s been so long the scent almost faded.

Xavier usually wouldn’t mind. You two had been friends for a long time. Hell, you and Rowan had been there for him when things ended with Bianca. It’s why he was there for you now.

He would always allow you to be there when you needed to. Would sit next to you and hold your hand to soothe you. Would climb into the bed with you if you hurt too much. He was there for emotional support. But this time it was him who needed it.

“Fuck!”

The door to the room swung closed hard, startling you. Xavier let his body fall against the door frame, sliding down to lean against it. You hadn’t seen him so upset in a long time. Not since Bianca.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” You asked through teary eyes.

“Oh- I- didn’t know you were here. It’s nothing really.”

“Hey, just because I’m hurting doesn’t mean I won’t listen to you.”

Softly you climbed over to him, dragging along the small blanket you had once bought Rowan. It always reminded you of the good times, of how much he loved you. It soothed you.

You wrapped it around Xaviers shoulders, sitting in front of him now. His eyes were watering with rage. You didn’t press him on telling you. He wouldn’t pressure you either. If he wanted to tell you, he would. You just put a hand on his leg, carefully looking at him.

“It’s Wednesday. She- had asked me to the Raven.”

“I remember. You were quite happy she did.”

“Yes and that’s why- ugh, I hate her.”

You knew that wasn’t true. You knew Xavier found the new girl intriguing. You couldn’t say the same for yourself. You couldn’t even look at her without being jealous. Being hurt.

You were jealous because she was the one who heard Rowan’s last words. And she was partly the reason he was gone. You believed her when she told you about what happened. You knew Rowan had slowly lost control of his powers and drifted off. You wish you could have stopped it. Could have saved him.

“She only asked me to cover for snooping around the shed. She never wanted to take me in the first place. And now I’m not sure I even want to go to that stupid ball.”

Xavier didn’t deserve this. To be treated like a last resort, or someone to play with. You grabbed his face now, forcing him to look at you.

“Xavier Thorpe. I’ve known you for so long. I know that there will be more people asking you to the dance. And I know that you’re an amazing person and anyone would be lucky to be your date to the ball. And if Wednesday can’t see that, she’s blind.”

Xavier put his hand over yours, grabbing it as a sign of gratitude. Cause he was thankful to have you. You two had become so close lately, he couldn’t even imagine what it would be like without your soothing voice, always saying the right things. A soft smile spread on his lips.

“I can really see what Rowan saw in you. Hell, I would be just as clingy as he was.”

“Oh shut up!”

————————————————————————

It had been two weeks and the Raven was slowly approaching. It was this weekend and slowly even you were stressed. You didn’t want to go at first, but frankly, you were sick and tired of grief.

Rowan wouldn’t have wanted you to spend any night crying in his old room. He wouldn’t have wanted you to hide from the crowds on a day as important as the Raven. He probably would have even told you, how you were too beautiful and lovely not to go.

You wanted to go with your friends at first. Unfortunately they had all found dates already. They hadn’t thought you wanted to go and made other plans. You weren’t mad, it was understandable. But you really didn’t feel like playing third wheel to any of them.

You could have of course just asked out some of the other people at school. At your best, you were popular, kind and social. It was unlikely you’d get turned down. But you didn’t feel like asking a stranger.

No, frankly, this was hard enough as it was. For you to finally go out there again after pulling back from all extracurricular activities, from any social contact let alone romance? It wasn’t easy.

There was only one plausible option left.

You had spotted him once again working on one of his famous murals. You loved them really. They were beautiful, always intricate and thought through. You admired how he could just whip up something like this.

He was currently busy walking away from you. You had flat out lead with a question, asking him if he had a date to the raven yet. When he realized what you entailed he immediately walked away from you.

“Xavier, please, would you just listen?”

“No! I am not some sort of rebound that you can ask because everyone else is already gone, I am not-“

“Listen to me, goddammit!”

He stopped dead in his tracks, turning around to look at you. Hell, half the courtyard was probably looking at you now. You were quite loud. You didn’t even mean to yell.

“I’m not even gonna pretend you are my first choice.”

“Wow, a real confidence boost, [Y/N].”

You grabbed his wrist before he could even leave this time. You wouldn’t give up that easily, not without explaining. You had thought about this a lot.

“You know Rowan was and always will be my first choice. But he’s not here. And he won’t come back, no matter what you believe happened. I am trying to not let that affect me anymore.”

Xavier looked at you with sorry eyes. He knew how upset you still were, you had come over to cry even more in the last days. He would sometimes just find you passed out on Rowan’s bed and put a blanket over you. He felt pity for you.

“If Rowan was here right now, he would think we’re both insane for not going. Hell, his roommate and partner, skipping the school’s biggest event? He would call us idiots.”

A small laugh escaped Xaviers lungs at the mental image of Rowan yelling at the two of you. Yeah, he would have his opinions. About how being popular was a privilege that you shouldn’t risk, how you should not care about him and go anyways.

“There is no one here I would rather go to the Raven with. I’m not asking you as a rebound or a second choice. I’m asking you because I trust you. Because you’re amazing. You have been the closest person to me since Rowan… whatever happened to him, you were there to catch me before falling through the cracks.”

He looked at you now, a smile on his face. You had never told him just how much you appreciated him. It made his hurt heart warm, a fuzzy feeling in his stomach as he saw a tiny bit of a smile on your face. He had missed that on you. You used to be so very bright and for the first time in forever, there seemed to be a spark in your eyes.

“It’s a shame that Wednesday missed out on this. On you. But if she really for one second thinks you’re a bad person, she’s insane. I know you and what you’ve been doing is the kindest thing I’ve ever witnessed. So I’m asking you as a friend. Will you go to The Raven with me?”

The silence in his face drove you crazy. You hated waiting for answers. Hated seeing his emotionless face. The facade didn’t last long as he grinned. He had made his decision a long time ago. And frankly, there was no other option for him, either.

“Of course I’ll go with you.”

“Thank you! Xavier, you’re the best!”

With a screech you fell around his neck and he caught you from stumbling by snaking his arms around your waist. The full blown smile on your lips was enough to make his cheeks go warm. He softly rested his head on yours.

Had he always felt this fuzzy when around you?

———————————————————————

You looked absolutely stunning in all white. Bianca, Yoko and Kent had taken you shopping some while back and frankly, hanging out with friends was just what you needed. You were almost excited for today, even when a small part of you couldn’t help but miss Rowan.

You had worn the necklace he bought you for an anniversary once. The silver went perfectly with your white outfit. You wondered what he would have worn. A suit, of course. You would have helped him pick out accessories, would have helped him with his hair.

A soft tear slipped your eyes but you pushed it away almost immediately when you saw your friends coming to you. They had pregamed in the nightshade library, but you didn’t feel like coming. It was too painful still to go in there without him. He loved the library, loved the quietness of the place.

“Damn, [Y/N]? Is that really you?” Ajax joked and you grinned at the compliment.

“Yoko and I made our best efforts to get rid of the sadness for at least one night.” Bianca called with a grin.

It was true. Lately you’d been walking around unkempt. Your uniform way too big as you usually wore his blazer, a thing you would get in trouble for frequently. You always had the biggest dark circles, your cheeks were puffy from all the crying.

Today, none of that was present.

Xavier was in the back, a white suit hanging loosely along his wide frame. He was so much taller than Rowan, you sometimes forgot. But when you hugged him hello, it became obvious to you again. He smelled good, had put on some cologne.

“You do look amazing. It’s good to see you like this.”

He barely whispered it into your ear but it was enough to bring shivers down your spine. All the compliments, all the smiles from your friends and the way Xavier couldn’t stop looking at you. It made you feel incredible for the first time in a while.

You enjoyed yourself, dancing and drinking some of the unspiked drinks. You and your friends always kept in close proximity on the dancefloor as Xavier spun you around, making sure you only focused on him for now. God, you felt good.

Until Wednesday Addams made her entry.

You figured she wasn’t gonna wear all white. Dresscodes didn‘t matter to her. Much less did it matter to her who she took to the dance apparently. Your eyes narrowed in anger as you spotted Tyler.

You barely knew him, had met him at the coffee shop a few times. But you knew the way him and his friends would ridicule Rowan. Or Xavier. They tried with you, but stopped when you saw you weren’t affected by it.

It wasn’t fair, how they picked on the outcasts. For being different, for being someone else. To them, Rowan was an easy target. But you always defended him. And Tyler had fun being horrible to them.

You looked up at Xavier, who had just become awfully tense. His gaze was fixed on Wednesday, on the way her hips swung as she danced with Tyler. God, he was so hurt. You wrapped your hands around his neck, bringing his focus back to you. You would make sure he wouldn’t be bothered. Take care of his pain like he took care of yours.

“She’s not worth your attention, Xay. Don’t let that entitled brat ruin your evening. Or the stupid police chief’s son. They don’t even compare to you. They’re not worthy of your presence. Or your anger.”

Xavier looked at you in awe again. How did you always know what to say? With just one look you calmed him down. With just one look you could make him forget all about his sorrows.

Fuck. What was this feeling? And why did it have him so guilty, so torn? You were Rowan‘s partner, he never even thought of you like this until-

Until you started laying in his room. Until he noticed the way you breathed when you were asleep. Until he noticed how soft your skin was. Or how warm you felt when he pulled you plush against his body.

His hands brought you in closer. Pulled you in so you were pressed against his body tightly. You could feel your cheeks redden as you hid your head in his shoulder. A smile spread on your lips with how close you were. Had he always looked this good? Had he always been so enticing? So very handsome? You were so infatuated with Rowan, you didn’t even notice.

“I’m glad you asked me to the Raven.”

“I’m glad you said yes.”

“I would have never turned you down.”

Your voices were barely whispers as the song became slower and the two of you even closer if that was possible. His face was right above yours. You just had to tiptoe and your lips would meet his. You could see the way his eyes darted to your lips.

One move and you could ruin it all.

You inched in, stopping right before your lips could meet his. If you jumped this hurdle now, there was no return. You had ruined your friendship with Xavier. Had moved on from Rowan.

A drop on your forehead took you back into reality. You separated from Xavier as he too looked to find the source. Suddenly one drop became multiple. You could see the red stain the white cloth covering your body. Within seconds the panic started.

You didn’t even see the crowd fleeing. The red drops making it onto your skin had brought you right back. To the nightmares you had. In which you held Rowan as he bled out all over you. In which you knew the monster killed him. Tears started streaming down your face when finally you regained some sort of vision.

You didn’t have to look long to find Xavier. He was still right there, looking ahead. Your eyes followed his as you spotted her again. Wednesday, dancing in the red liquid like it was her home.

It wasn’t fair. That she was the one who got everything you ever wanted. She got to say goodbye to Rowan. Got to see who it was that hurt him. Got to see his last moments. And now she even got Xavier.

“[Y/N]! [Y/N], we have to leave!”

It was Bianca that had been shaking your shoulders as people stumbled all along the floor. And suddenly you heard the screams. The panic. And it was all too much. With tears streaming down your face you ran. To the only place that gave you solace.

His bed.

———————————————————————

The door shutting had brought you back to your senses. You were still shaking, even if the tears had stopped a while ago. You immediately scrambled up, not wanting to be seen in this position.

Xavier immediately came to your side as he saw how hurt you looked again. Fuck, did you think of Rowan again? Of course you would. Going to the Raven was a stupid idea. His heart stung as he saw what a mess you still were.

“I should leave.”

“What? [Y/N], no, you can stay. I can sleep in the shed if I have to-“

“No. This is your room, I shouldn’t even be-“

“Don’t be silly. You can always come here. God, you’re still drenched. Wait, let me-“

His feet swiftly took him to the bathroom, grabbing a towel and wrapping you in it. He had to chuckle at how adorable you looked as you sat down on the bed. His eyes trailed down to the sheets, a grimace on his face as he saw how stained they were.

“I’m afraid we have to wash those. I’m sorry, I know how much you enjoy that they-“

“It’s okay. They’re just sheets.”

“What?”

“They haven’t smelled like him in ages. I just didn’t know where else to go.”

Xavier looked at you now, a worried look on his face. For you to act so indifferent about the sheets when they would usually give you so much comfort? Something else was going on. Something was off.

“How about we get you out of these clothes first. You’ll catch a cold if you don’t change. I’ll give you something to wear. Then we can sit on my dry bed and talk, hm?”

“You don’t have to take care of me.”

“I want to.”

You could feel your cheeks blushing once again as Xavier grabbed your hand, squeezing it to reassure you. Gosh, how could he be so selfless even now? How could he make you feel so good even when you were at rock bottom just seconds earlier?

He stood now, pulling out some of his old clothes. It was a t-shirt that looked way too big for you. Paint stains had painted it in all types of colors. He also put a pair of sweatpants onto his bed, making sure you were comfortable.

“I’ll- I’ll go change in the bathroom. And you can change in here. You can just wrap yourself in my blankets if you feel like it. I’ll join you in a second.”

You nodded carefully as you watched Xavier leave towards the bathroom. Carefully you pushed out of your drenched outfit. You decided to just wear his shirt for now, it being too warm in his room anyways. Luckily your underwear had remained relatively dry.

You walked to his unmade bed, grabbing the blanket and pulling it around your body carefully. You had never sat on his bed, you just now realized. Had always made sure to stay in Rowan’s, not to cross any boundaries.

You realized just how much his blanket smelled of him. You had gotten used to the scent of him so much. When he would lay next to you in bed, it would lull you to sleep quietly. Something you always blamed on the exhaustion that crying brought with it.

“You can come back out if you’re done!”

You quietly shouted, knowing damn well he was too scared to impose. You knew he would never just walk out, possibly humiliating you.

You swallowed as you saw him. He was wearing just a pair of grey sweatpants, his shirt long abandoned. His hair was lose now, falling into his face, some locks still slightly wet. You blushed deeply as he walked over to you, sitting next to you.

Xavier grabbed your hand, his knuckles accidentally brushing against your thighs in the process. He didn’t even notice you abandoned the sweatpants until now. He blushed, but never hesitated to intertwine your fingers with his.

“Why are you so upset?”

“It’s silly. I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Humor me.”

Your eyes shot up to his. He encouraged you to talk to him. That was new. A deep sigh escaped your lungs as you began to speak.

“I had so much fun tonight. I really forgot all the pain and what I went through. It was going so well and then- then some Normie pricks had to ruin the perfect evening.”

You swallowed hard as tears threatened to spill once more. Xavier was quick to pull you against him, his arms wrapping around your shoulders. You took it, needing some sort of comfort. But you didn’t fail to notice just how warm he was.

“That’s not silly, [Y/N]. For what it’s worth, I also enjoyed spending the evening with you.”

“Oh please.”

You scoffed at him. You couldn’t believe him, even if you wanted to. You saw the way he looked at Wednesday, saw the way she enthralled him. He grabbed you by the shoulders, holding you to look at him. Why were you doubting him all of a sudden?

“I’m sure you were happy the stupid prank saved you. God, you ogled at Wednesday as she danced in the mess.”

“[Y/N], I didn’t-“

“Didn’t what, Xavier? You were scared to be the rebound. Well guess what, right now it feels like I am.”

His eyes were shocked. He hadn’t seem you this upset with him before. And it stung, to hear your harsh words. You had gotten it all wrong. He had to explain, had to tell you what was happening. Carefully he grabbed your face, forcing you to look at him.

“You are not a rebound. You never were. I wanted to go with you. You make me so happy. You soothe me in seconds and are an incredible person. I looked at Wednesday, sure. Cause she looked absolutely insane. I was wondering how I could have ever been upset about her when the one I really wanted was right in front of me.”

You blushed now, a soft tear spilling down your cheek. You didn’t even know how much he cared. God, you were so dumb. How could you ever doubt him, how could you ever think he didn’t want you? If it wasn’t for the prank, you’re sure he would have-

He was looking at you again. Looking straight at your lips as he inched in. He softly wiped the tear off your cheek, making sure you were no longer upset. He knew he couldn’t have you. But he wanted you so badly.

“I know you’re not ready. I know you probably thought of Rowan all night. You said it yourself, I wasn’t your first choice. But know that I’m right here if you need me. Say the word and I’m yours.”

You interrupted him with a peck to his lips. He looked at you, surprised. You had just kissed him. He wasn’t dreaming, right? Carefully he moved one of his hands to the nape of your neck as he pulled you in once again.

The kiss was slow, sensual. It was intimate in a way you haven’t felt in a while. If ever. You had missed this. Had missed the sparks flying between two people as they kissed. The way you felt like time stopped.

To say you and Rowan didn’t have your issues would have been a simple lie. He had been losing it long before Wednesday came to school and frankly, you hated the person he became then. But even then, Xavier was there to notice. To call Rowan out on how he treated you. It was why he urged the others to kick him out of the nightshades.

He had liked you for a long time. And he was sure you felt the same way. Wednesday’s arrival and Rowan’s death had held you back from acting out. Still, it brought you so much closer. Xavier pulled back, carefully catching his breath.

“We should stop. I don’t want to push you to something you’re not ready for.”

“I think I’ve been ready for ages. I was jealous when you looked at Wednesday. Because once again she got what I wanted. She had you. Or so I thought.”

Xavier couldn’t hold back now. He pushed you back, softly laying you down on his pillows as he kissed you again.

———————————————————————

You fell back as Xavier took control. The blanket had long been pushed off the bed as he softly kissed your lips, making sure you were comfortable. He was impatient, but he wanted to make sure that you were alright with every single move.

“Tell me to stop and I’ll stop.”

“Shut up and kiss me.”

You pulled him in by his hair, your hands tangling in them immediately. He was so gentle, so soft yet you could feel a need behind his eyes. You had every intention of unlocking that need.

You ground your hips into his, making sure to let him know you were just as needy as he was. He groaned as his hands clasped at the shirt you were wearing. Quickly he pulled it off you, discarding it to the side. You had no time to feel shame. Not when Xavier was leaving breathy kisses against your neck, causing you to breathe heavily.

You gripped his shoulders for support as he sucked softly. A grin spread on his lips at your reactions. He knew you were vocal, he had walked in on you and Rowan one too many times. But to hear you react to him instead, it gave him a newfound confidence.

He gnawed at your skin, making sure to leave marks. He didn’t even care who saw. He just wanted to make sure everyone knew that you had finally moved on. That you were once again off the market, that you were his. Were you his?

“God, please, I need you.”

He chuckled softly at your words, like you had read his mind. His kisses trailed further down your torso and down your stomach. His hands gripped your sides like a vice but he was keen on pleasing you.

With a little help from your telekinetic powers you pushed him off you, pressing him against the wall behind his bed for just a second. No, you were not gonna let him do this. Not like this. Carefully you let him go again as you stood from the bed. He looked confused, worried.

“Did I do something wrong?”

“No.” you knelt, pulling his body to you with the snap of your wrist. “I’m not letting you take care of me again. It’s my turn to give back.”

A grin spread onto your lips as you held onto his thighs. He looked shocked, surprised even. You were really kneeling in front of him, offering to take care of him. He must be dreaming. Must be in one of his twisted wet dreams that he sometimes had, especially when you snuggled into him as you slept.

You grabbed the waistband of his sweatpants now, pulling them off his legs. He helped, keen on letting you do your work. He had skipped the underwear of course, leaving him exposed and hard in front of you. He was already dripping with precum.

You bit your lip for one second at the sight. So the rumors were true. Bianca had mentioned some things back in the day, some you never paid much attention to. But the taller the man, the bigger certain features was something that rang true.

“You don’t have to- Holy shit.”

You didn’t even let him finish as you licked along his tip, swallowing up his precum. You had some experience. You weren’t new to dating, after all. So you also knew exactly which moves to use to make a man happy.

Your tongue kept swirling around his tip, licking up and down his head. The groans escaping his body were heaven to your ears. You pulled back for a second, only to lick up his shaft, engulfing his head in your mouth.

Xavier knew then he was a goner. His hands gripped the sheets as he watched you carefully. You started bopping your head at your own pace, intended on making him have some fun. And boy, was he having it.

You pushed yourself even further onto his dick, until his tip touched the back of your throat. Xavier groaned so hard he could have cum right there. He could feel you gagging around him, could feel you trying everything to make him happy.

He pulled you off him after a while and you looked up at him with sad eyes. Did you do something wrong? Did you mess up? Did he not want you anymore? Softly he grabbed your chin, making you look up at him. A smile plastered his face as his thumb softly swiped over your lip.

“I’m not gonna last long if you’re this good to me. And I wanna feel you around me as I do.”

You could feel yourself blush as he pulled you back up the bed. He sat you on his lap, but not before pulling your underwear to the ground. Your eyes widened as he massaged your thighs, all whilst his hard dick was pressing against you.

“You’re sure you still want this?”

“More than ever.”

He didn’t have to prep you much. He knew you were ready, knew you could take him. He spat on his hand, lubing up his manhood so he could make it easier for you. He lifted your hips just slightly before he pushed you onto him.

You could feel him press against your walls, could feel the way you squeezed around him. He was slow, lowering you step by step. He did not want to hurt you. Ever. You moaned, biting your lips as he bottomed out.

“You take me so well.”

“Mhh I can feel you so deep.”

“I know. I can feel you clench around me.”

He started rolling his hips up, thrusting into you. He was slow, making sure to get you used to his size first. His arms wrapped around your waist, holding you as close to him as possible.

You didn’t even notice you were looking right at Rowan’s bed. One you had done oh so similar things in quite a few times. But you couldn’t even remember. Remember what his lips felt like, remember what he felt like. Remember his smell.

You had finally let go.

All you could smell now was Xavier. All you could feel was how his arms held you in place, how he pushed into you. The way he groaned against you. It was so much, all too much. You couldn’t even think straight, too cockdrunk as he kept thrusting into you, now harder and faster.

All you could think about was him.

Xavier. Xavier. Xavier. A few times his name even slipped out of your mouth as you neared your own release, loud moans spilling out of you. You were so close. So very close.

“Xavier, I’m gonna-“

“Cum for me. Please, let go. Take what you need.”

He didn’t have to tell you twice as your body started convulsing against his. Your thighs trembled as you rode out your high. He held you close, making sure your tired body doesn’t just topple off him to the ground. He knew the way you looked when you were exhausted. But this time it was for all the right reasons.

He stilled, waiting on you to come back to him. After a while you did and he placed soft kisses along the back of your neck. His fingers softly tapped along your thighs and you chuckled a bit at his antics.

“Why did you stop moving?”

“We don’t have to continue of you’re too spent.”

“We are not stopping until we’re both satisfied.”

You took the reigns now, holding onto his arms as you started moving your hips once again. You were overstimulated, your legs wobbly, but you wanted to have him find his own relief.

The kisses he pressed into your neck became sloppier as he met your movements with his own thrusts. You could feel he was getting close, his dick twitching every now and then and his moves becoming more uncontrolled.

With a loud groan he shot his load right into you. He pushed you into his lap as his hips stuttered, his cum filling you up. He hadn’t done this in a while. You could tell by how hard his orgasm hit him.

Xavier stilled for a while, his breathing heavy. He gave you a sign before moving you out of him, his cum spilling all over his own legs. His face distorted at the feeling, causing you to chuckle. He grabbed a few tissues from his nightstand, cleaning both you and him up.

Carefully you got back into your underwear and his shirt and he followed part, pulling his sweatpants over his hips. You didn’t know what you needed more, a shower or sleep. Xavier decided for you as he pulled you into his arms, picking up the blanket and pulling it over the two of you.

You turned to face him, looking up at his soft face. He was tired but happy. You were sure you looked similar to him, very much spent. The two of you should have done this ages ago.

“If this is what I get I will gladly be the rebound.”

“I told you, you’re not the rebound, Xavier. You always should have been my first choice.”