#and oh my gosh im getting way to invested in this 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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kalpasio · 2 years ago
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Oh!! Speaking of Kelp at the orphanage, I was looking through my camera roll and I ran across that picture of him again. I looked closer at his old mask and I’m like “what the hell is that supposed to be??”. Then I was plagued by visions. His mask struck me as a little weird, because at a time where honkai was running rampant, I doubt he would have had the time to stop at a Spirit Halloween and buy one.
I thought the texture kind of resembled wood and I remembered that he had wooden figures in his luggage— so like what if it was a keepsake one of the kids carved for him?? If I remember correctly, there was a cutscene where there were some kids (presumably infected with honkai), sitting under a tree, so maybe the tree ACTUALLY has some significance, but frankly I think I’m becoming delusional. It’s more likely that the devs were just like… “huh this looks cool” and slapped it on him. I can only dream 😔
-yo hey anon AGAIN I am so sorry
I think, I'm not 100% sure, but I think, he had the mask before coming to the orphanage? cause aponia just pulled him off the streets like some sort of kidnapper and I don't think it's said if he had it at that point or not but I've always just assumed he did?
I do know that in chapter three? you can try to talk to Kalpas and ask about the mask and he tells you to fuck off 🧡 and then Elysia comes over and will answer your questions and you can ask her about the mask and she says it was just like a super common kids mask you could buy anywhere lol and then I think Sakura confirms this?
the kids giving him the mask makes a lot more sense to me tho. like man's insane but not to the point of just wearing a mask for no reason, and I think sentimentality is extremely high on his list of good reasons lol
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vengefulvermin · 2 months ago
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Can i get more passage of time/music development yapping ☹️☹️☹️??? I give you official permission to yap the most you can im so interested
YES YES YES YES YES I LOVE THIS ASK
warning beneath the cut SCARY WALL OF TEXT WARNING 😱
decided to divide it into colored parts if you dont gaf about certain elements 😭
second warning all of this is unedited rambling so some points might contradict each other or just plain not make sense.
okay so for CONTEXTTTTT
i have diagnosed OCD, and like, roughly since the end of last year and the beginning of this one, the 'obsession' part of OCD that was negatively affecting me, was the concept of time. how fleeting it was. how it's basically unescapable ALL THINGS MUST PASS (get out of my head george harrison) that shit proper cold dead SCARED ME MAN. sleepless & haunting me in my dreams type shi. sometimes it still does. i try not to think about it too much
to cope, i found great comfort in the 70s-80s since at the time i was and still am hyperfixated on david bowie and that was sort of his prime (love his 90s-00s work tho.) i was also starting to think of how much parallels and similar experiences i have to previous generations and how it's not ALL that bad after all so far. i can still walk to a record store and roller skate if i really wanted to, or go to a diner.
okey here's where the life changing stuff happens. i decided i'd listen to pink floyd's the dark side of the moon. then TIME CAME ON. ohhhh god oh gosh golly god i was bawling and everything the whole song spoke to me on a molecular level. then i found out about DB's song also called time, and i ALSO crode to that. i was like. wow. i'm not alone on this feeling of utter desperation and helplessness as eventually all things Must Pass. (GEORGE HARRSION GTFO)
i used to be bitchy on how i whined i was part of the 'wrong generation.' i thought i was alone, but virtually everyone of almost every era has thought this. somebody who lived my dream life wished they had what i have now.
that's when i started to lowkey realize the parallels and oneness of human experience. i could go to a club in the 70s, and (granted the infrastructure and music remains similar) i could today. nothing would change on how i perceive events. there is no color filter on the past. unless you got huge TVs and stuff all over your house, you could walk around, and think it's the 80s. AND IT'S BASICALLY THE 80s. the way your parents or any other gen Xer saw the world with their *eyes* (not counting the changes in buildings and stuff) is the same as you today pretty much.
i already really enjoy subcultures, and particularly how they evolve and adapt. the indomitable human spirit prevails no matter how gentrified or 'banned' things become. nowadays i feel like there is No Youth Subcultures. at least, none that will pass the test of time and be memorable enough to be remembered in the books. nobody's gonna go to their child and proudly say: "when i was your age, i was a chav" or something. and i credit this to the lack of creativity allowed in the wider music industry.
HEAR ME OUT this is because 90% of youth subcultures had everything to do with music. and now, everything must be palatable. to be clear there's nothing inherently wrong with that type of music, but to me it speaks no soul. it has no risks. contemporary pop music is very much formulaic and this is because now more than ever entertainment (this also applies to movies btw) is more of an investment than passion. I WILL SPECIFY.
music production is so vastly different genre to genre, and we're not letting it flourish because of how much short form content is valued nowadays. LET ME COOK.
tiktoks are formulaic. algorithms are formulaic. WE'RE GETTING SOMEWHERE. there must be an instant hook or rift in music if you want to 'go viral' as a musician. digitized fame doesn't mean SHIT (to me), since clearly monthly listeners don't equate real world fans. album sales are being replaced with streams, and because of how ASS spotify treats its artists, newer, less established acts need to GET ON THE GRIND INSTANTLY to earn Coin. that means that to be smart and work with the exploitative system they're given, they have to make albums filled with 1 minute 30 second songs. so you can technically give them the most amount of streams possible. i feel with this formulaic approach, you can't get 6 minute long gutwrenching guitar pieces. no more 4 minute drum solos, hell avant garde experimental works were 2 people shout their names out at each other for 20 minutes. THERE ARE NO MORE FRANK ZAPPAS.
i'm not going to be one of those sad assholes who claim there's 'no more good rock music' and how it'll never be the same. as corny as this is, the next beatles or nirvana could be right under our noses and we'll NEVER know because of how fame is distributed. it sucks to see a small band beg on tiktok for streams to kickstart their career. but this is what we gotta work with. if we want subcultures to be created and thrive, we gotta go looking underground again, except unlike in the past it's a kajillion times easier now AND everything gets gentrified in 2 tiktok weeks. but this is evolution. MUSIC EVOLUTION
the end honk shoo honk shoo (it's midnight)
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greenofrain · 1 year ago
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This is my liveblog draft that I made during the episode that I abandoned after Hermie started talking bc I got too invested.
I am a Tori stan, she is an icon
I'm so glad that we're getting Scam Likely as the emcee, I love him
Linc showing Tori the Garfield movie and laughing at the first line is GOLD
Also he relates to Garfield bc Jon adopted him 😭😭😭 my boy
"He's not being nice here" IM DYING OH MY GOD
Matt has to win, this is hysterical
This is actually so sweet
HES GOT ON JOKER MAKEUP NO FUCKING WAY
Taylor as Austin Powers was so worth it
OH BEHAVE holy fuck I threw my phone
FURRIES
TAYLOR YOU CAN'T JUST TAG OUT AFTER BRINGING UP NALA FROM THE LION KING
Scam Likely from across the room is so funny
Scary Marlowe is the greatest fictional character ever
MORE LIKE CROWD LEISURE
Using "Gosh" as a punchline catchphrase is the funniest shit I've ever heard
Maybe I should watch Napoleon Dynamite
GAWRSH
Will Campos deserves the win. Holy shit.
NORMAL IS TAKING THE FUCKING GLOVES OFF THATS SO MUCH
Oh no norm stop
Norm stop
Hermie time
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hannieween · 4 months ago
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re: heartbreaker pt. iv (spoilers ahead!)
girl...... giRL.........!.?.?:?.!.!. oh my god when i say you cooked with this one and i am munching on it so good 👩���🍳
thank you for the amazing update and i can def tell you poured your heart into the previous chapter (one of my favorites of all time to-date) and i'm SO.. SO impressed with part iv!! truly impressed with every inch of it fr. and as much as im a sucker for angst (as we know), it's always so lovely to have a lighter chapter with movement and heart-to-heart conversations. lived up to the wait and i will wait for as long as it takes if you are happy with your writing !!!
i dont really mention the spicy parts of of writing a lot just bc it makes me super flustered but UGH i am salivating. how do you cook it up so hard i will never understand but it makes me feel warm fuzzy feelings in my heart (amongst other feelings JAJSJSOCNAKLANXKEKD) you have me kicking my feet in the air and giggling like some poor lovesick girly 😭😭😭❤️🛌
aside from that—
i just KNEW wonu would be the one to sus our couple out (which tbf, i agree with him that they didnt hide it very well that day in particular LOL). but it was so cute afterwards and i could literally see the scene play out in my mind when he ratted them 🥹😀 honestly i would be living so hard for a wonu drabble going more into his backstory and what he does outside of working— oh gosh gyu too i love how you wrote these two in the au SO MUCH 😭😭😭
more importantly, as an avid City Lights and Lights Out enjoyer— seeing our lead's interaction with Jeonghan tickles my heart in a way that makes me go 🥲 Seeing another perspective of what he was going through prior in the series before the latest chapter *scrunching my face with my fists* Makes me feel for him so badly again
I will never shut up about how i love the way you connect the series together in the au and how differently everyone fits together 🥰 Genuinely so invested in the au that I have to go back and real everything to pick apart and how they fit together. I hope you keep writing this au and expand to other members (even if it's just a drabble or hc) because at this point im just in love with all the characterization 😭🥹❤️
Looking forward to whatever you write next <333 !! Happy writing~
HI HONEY
i always get excited when i read your reviews!! i love this haha
it touches my teeny tiny heart to know that heartbreaker ch 3 is one of your favorites!!!! 🥹🩵 thank you baby
i love that you noticed our detective wonu at work 🕵🏻‍♀️ it was so so fun to write!! i imagined him like:
banging on the countertop as it dawned on him that yn is his boss's ex haha
i'll make a one shot for him one day!! hehe i have something planned already but i have so many projects atm 😩😩😩
i honestly debated a lot when i wrote that jeonghan scene.. i didn't want to mess up the timelines but at the end i decided to keep it because i really love jeonghan and i would like for him to show up in every fic i write hahahah
thank you!! thank you so much. i have so much fun writing this series, i'll try to keep it updated! thank you baby 🥹🩵🥹🩵
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wooyoungisbaby · 4 months ago
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whah new chapter so soon!! :DD you’re a fucking champ!!!! 
Oh gosh… A few paragraphs in, my stomach dropped when i realized what was going on (/pos). I just remembered what this chapter was teased to be about, and…. Im already in pain :) again, /pos. im picking sannie up in my hands and smooching him like hes a wet, scared kitten. He’s just going through the motions of checking on his partners and taking care of them, but he’s so far away T_T 
they were the right kind of sobs, right?
Of course they were, silly!!! ;o; @ woo and reader, please reassure him asap !!!!
You are different from… from…
👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀
You are his responsibility, not the other way around.
SCREAMING!!!! Sannie baby it goes both ways! ;o; Gahhh im so invested in his happiness wtf igby<3 He was Just having a good time, giving his partners and himself what they wanted, and now his brain is being mean to him!! :’( 
You had a perfect view of the utter bliss stretched across Wooyoung’s face, tongue lolling out as San kept his head yanked back by the hair.
..okay, you’re forgiven bc this is a delicious mental image hdnhsjhjshd
San does not resist when you pull him into a back-hug, numbly letting himself get manoeuvred
His willingness to go along with this when he was in his aftercare role just seconds ago, says so much about how much he needs care and reassurance. 
San swallows thickly, looking strangely small in your arms. 
The way it’s SO easy to imagine this T_T He’s such a good dom and such a pillar for the other two in this story, and it’s easy to forget that he’s also a human with needs and limits and fears. And a past. 
[...] along with a small twinge of something more complicated. 
Insecurity (or jealousy?) that they know each other better than either of them knows her? Just thinking out loud eheh
“Seriously, the lengths I have to go to to get fed properly around here,”
I SNORTED 😂
“We look after each other around here. What’d you do if it was me or Wooyoung?” “…I’d look after you.”
YES TELL HIM!!!! I love it when a situation like this is turned on its head. I can hear San thinking “it’s not the same” but IT IS ��
There is nothing cheeky about San’s gaze this time.
😭 ♥️
He’d just sidled up to the bedroom with Byeol in his arms, thinking to provide San some extra company.
This guy!! Always plotting and scheming. To do good, but still. 
Well, same difference, really.
Yeah, i was about to say pfff <3
There is a light pout on San’s face and he snores softly
he’s so cute im gonna throw up hjhsahdddhd
“San is just— um—” “Ah.”
oh he knows xD
[...] waking him with a few gentle nips of teeth.
Woo really bit him awake, menace that he is <3
“Hey. Good morning.”
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There is something weirdly adorable about a guy being so self-conscious about his morning wood when he’s had his dick inside your body’s horny trinity of holes more times than you care to count.
First of all, love the way you phrased all this 😂 Secondly, YEAH this is Choi San we’re talking about,, he’s polite and respectful. Humble and kindness, even. 
“Yeah,” San says quietly. “Want to be taken care of.”
brb walking into traffic due to an urgent case of San Is Too Precious
Igbyyyy oh my goOdnhjjd  this part where they’re only just starting to, err, take care of San. there’s something white-hot but light inside my chest seeing him like this, it’s just like. relief? also hornie, you know how it is. 
(maybe it's just that i'm getting to put my own brain into San for once, in this fic? That's how my brain works btw, it puts itself into whoever is the sub and/or bottom in a fic and i perceive the fic as though i am them. or something like that?)
and soon he’s writhing between you and Wooyoung, eyes squeezed shut in pleasure.
cartoon-style, there’s a volcano on top of my head and baby it is erupting. 
“Such a good boy you are for us,” Wooyoung coos at San
nvm i am actually an ice cube being dropped into a furnace. which is to say, melting. 
“Want me to edge you? Would you like that, Sannie?”
my birthday was two days ago, what is this?? A treat of edging? foR ME?? 
[...] he just doesn’t know what to do with himself if he’s not making us feel good.”
>:3c there are remedies for that. by which i mean.. tying him up so he doesn’t have any way to reciprocate. ✨
[...] wanna be good…” A thick tear escapes San’s lashes, streaking down his puffy cheek.
igbyyyy 😭 he’s CRYING!! in the best way possible, this is tearing me tf apart hhhhh He must have needed this really bad >< 
San makes a strangled noise, shaking his head like he’s embarrassed to say it out loud, but eventually stammers, “T-tits.”
[insert the cartoon volcano head again] No seriously im fucking ascending  hjfnhjhf
He melts into the bed with a shuddered breath, like the thought of pushing back does not even occur to him.
i know he’s mainly a dom in this dynamic but he’s actually such a perfect and wonderful sub that i might cry 
Just a funny little anecdote from a previous fandom i was in: me and some pals™ became obsessed with a 3way ship and made up many kinky scenes for them, one of which resulted in me adding the white card “edging a guy and then coming on his tits” to our custom Cards Against Humanity deck. And this scene reminded me of that :3 
[...] until San is trembling, so lost in pleasure he no longer has the presence of mind to respond to your kiss. 
Im standing on my balcony, looking to the horizon. The sun is rising, casting everything i can see in warm light, the wind tickling me as it sweeps through my hair. Everything is calm and quiet, only a few people far below me up at this hour, no doubt heading for early morning shifts. An lone owl bids the night farewell with a deep coo. For a beat i stand here, taking in the tranquility of the world. I inhale deeply, greedy for the crisp air. On the exhale, i scream as loud as i possibly can. “Choi san is a sub!” The owl takes off, terrified. A guy i don’t know looks up at me, seemingly unsure if he should be concerned or just pissed off. He decides on the latter. “Shut the fuck up, it’s 7am!” he yells back. I care not. I have to speak my truth and the universe will listen. 
“Don’t think so lowly of yourself, Woo,” you huff. “I also use you for your cooking.”
hJDNFJSDH SCREAMING 😂
San brightens like the sun breaking through cloudcover, delighted at your ‘use’ for him.
He’s a big fuckin teddy bear, SO happy to be used for his hugging skills. He’s adorable. 
“I could help out more, you know. Move in, share the load. The laundry load.”
SCREAMING????? 
share the load.
Ayyyy 😉
I dont have a brain rn im afraid, so no closing thoughts aside from AAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
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whichever way [woosan x reader] pt11
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pairing: woosan x f reader
rating: 18+
genre: smut, fluff, angst, neighbours au, FWB to QPR
ch. summary: San drops, but you and Wooyoung are here to catch him.
wc: 7.8k
ch. warnings for opening scene: dom drop, dirty talk, degradation kink & hair pulling (@ Wooyoung), dumbification (@ reader), pussy slap, anal & vaginal sex, angst, anxiety spiral abt hurting one’s partners
warnings for the rest of the chapter: hurt / comfort, sub San, soft dom duo Wooyoung & reader, somnophilia if you squint, sleepy morning sex, titty worship (@ San), hand / blowjob, orgasm denial, thigh riding, cum shot (chest @ San), cum eating / sharing, praise kink, San is called ‘good boy’
a/n: features a soft-bodied, aromantic reader who uses she/her pronouns. mention of stretch marks.
a/n²: barely proofread bc my brain is being a lil bratty bastard man abt editing
masterlist. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14
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“Can’t even fuck her right, can you Woo? Can’t do anything with that pussy without my help.”
Gently, San undoes the two handcuffs that bound each of Wooyoung’s wrists to yours. His eyes scan over Wooyoung’s skin for abrasions, but San struggles to pay his full care and attention to the task. His mind refuses to stay in the moment, instead rewinding the night’s events, over and over again like a broken tape-player. The images grow more distorted with every replay.
His muscles still burn from the force with which he’d rammed into Wooyoung from behind, who’d been on top of you. Every harsh slam of San’s hips had buried Wooyoung’s cock deeper into you, indirectly fucking you with his ruthless pace.
“You’re decent with that smart mouth, Woo, but we both know it’s my cock she likes better. Isn’t that so, baby?”
You had whined, too fucked out to answer.
“Aw look at her trying to spare your feelings. Sweet thing. Or maybe she’s just fucked too dumb to think. Any cock will do now, even yours.”
Had you really been too fucked out to answer? What if you had been too unwilling? Filled with guilt at the thought of picking one over the other — even if it was just for play, only to rile Wooyoung up.
San blinks, trying to get his vision focused. Sweat-matted hair clings to his forehead, unpleasantly sticky and prickling at his eyes. The fabric of his robe feels strangely scratchy against his skin, making it hard to concentrate while his thumbs press into your wrist, stimulating your blood-flow on pure auto-pilot.
“You like that, baby? Like it when I fuck you with Wooyoung’s cock? Much better than letting him fumble on his own. At least I know how to treat that tight cunt.”
Wooyoung had sobbed at the humiliation — they were the right kind of sobs, right? Wooyoung knows San didn’t mean it?
It had all felt good in the moment, but now doubt slithers into San’s memories, a dark chill creeping up his spine. Had he gone too far in degrading Wooyoung, crossing the line of cruel pleasure into simple cruelty? Had he made the wrong move by trying to rope you into his debasement of Wooyoung?
There’s a weird static in San’s ears. Vaguely he hears someone praising him, telling him he did so well; but the words can’t connect to him. They don’t fire off positive neurons in his brain, don’t bring the reassurance he so craves.
‘Did they really want it?’ a low insidious voice whispers to San instead. ‘What if they are just going along with what you pushed on them?’
San frowns. No; you and Wooyoung explicitly consented to all this beforehand. Neither of you are in the habit of neglecting your own safety in a misguided attempt to spare his feelings. You would have told him if anything felt bad. You are different from… from…
He shakes his head, trying to shake off the static. You and Wooyoung would have been honest, he stubbornly tells himself. That much he can trust on — right? Right? San’s frown deepens as he tries to look at you, his eyes shaky. You look so tired…
A cold void presses up against the inside of San’s ribcage, and he stiffens in sudden recognition, finally understanding what is happening to him.
No. Nonono. This can’t happen. Not right now. He can’t drop now. He has take care of you and Wooyoung first. You are his responsibility, not the other way around. It shouldn’t be the other way around. If he can’t even take care of his partners then—
“San? Are you okay?”
The question comes from far away. Again, he’s not sure who is asking it. San forces himself to smile. No, wait, he’s not smiling. Shit. Shit.
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A beautiful soreness has settled in your body, lingering memories clinging to your muscles. You had a perfect view of the utter bliss stretched across Wooyoung’s face, tongue lolling out as San kept his head yanked back by the hair. Overwhelmed by San’s harsh pace and words, by fucking you while being fucked; yet always hungry for more, deliberately wiggling his ass when San told him to keep still, or shamelessly talking back at him.
You’re convinced that just the rough, haphazard thrusts of Wooyoung would have been enough to make you cum, more than enough when combined with the entrancing sight of him and San entangled; but it certainly didn’t hurt when San reached a hand around Wooyoung’s waist to thrum at your clit. He’d even smacked the oversensitive nub, with just enough force to send you straight into one of the most intense orgasms you’ve had in recent weeks.
You could happily stay submerged in those memories for hours to come, but the pleasant haze of the aftermath fades quickly when San massages your wrists — and you suddenly realise something is off.
He looks tired, which is not unusual after an intense session, but somehow it’s the wrong kind of tired. His eyes are unfocused, and although he’s taking perfect care of you, there is none of the usual warmth of his attentive glow. Like he is just going through the motions. San never just goes through the motions.
A dread sinks into your stomach as a grim suspicion flits through your mind.
“San? Are you okay?”
Wooyoung, who had been drinking some water, looks up before San even registers that you asked him something.
San’s brow furrows, the skin around his eyes tightening. He faintly shakes his head, and you can’t be sure if that’s meant to be an answer to your question or just an involuntary motion, but it’s an answer either way.
Your heart flinches.
“Woo?” you say, deliberately keeping your voice calm. San does not resist when you pull him into a back-hug, numbly letting himself get manoeuvred as you wrap your arms around him, holding him tightly against your chest. “I think San’s—”
“Yeah,” Wooyoung says, already by your side with a bottled electrolyte drink and an energy bar. “Hey, Sannie,” he murmurs gently, brushing San’s hair off his forehead. “What’s wrong? Too much today?”
San swallows thickly, looking strangely small in your arms. Tension pours out of his body — but it’s too fast, like he is emptying himself of everything, deflating in your embrace until only a hollow shell is left. There’s an odd, glassy shine to his eyes as he looks from you to Wooyoung.
“Are— are you okay?” San manages to ask weakly. “Are you hurt? Did— did I—?”
His uncertain voice pierces your chest, deep and sharp.
“No, we’re not hurt.” You plant a firm kiss on his limp shoulder, tightening your hold on him. “We’re fine, Sannie,” you murmur past the sudden lump in your throat, pressing another kiss on the side of his head. “No one is hurt, you made us feel so good.”
San lets out a pained whine, like he tries to shrink away from the positive affirmation.
“Hey, hey, listen,” Wooyoung says, gentle but firm, tipping up San’s chin so their eyes meet. “San, it was exactly what I wanted out of this. Are you hearing me? You did nothing we didn’t want.”
He is adamant in his reassurance, aimed at San’s deepest insecurity with pin-point precision, and San manages to take a deep breath.
“I— I hear you,” he says, giving a shaky nod.
Relief floods through you when Wooyoung’s words achieve what yours could not; along with a small twinge of something more complicated. You don’t linger on that twinge, centering your attention on San instead.
You help San to drink a few sips of water, and Wooyoung tears open the energy bar’s wrapper, breaking off a few bite-sized pieces.
Wooyoung keeps up his steady stream of reassurances, while you decide to focus on grounding San through physical touch. Better to let Wooyoung handle the talking on this one, clearly. One of your arms is wrapped securely around San’s narrow waist, freeing up your other hand to gently caress over the slight trembles running through his body.
You’ve never seen San go through dom drop this hard, this fast. He’s had to shake off a light funk, and you do vividly remember the one time San came by your place a whole day afterwards, a belated response to the scene. He’d been clingy and despondent, wanting to hold you and be held; and you had done exactly that, much like you are holding him now.
Together, you and Wooyoung weave a bright, warm protective bubble around San, nursing the bruises of his fall. His deflated spirit is slowly replenished with your caring attentions, helped along by the energy bar and electrolytes. Soon there is only a crumpled wrapper and an empty bottle left, but you and Wooyoung are still there.
Still protecting him from himself.
Finally San settles into your hold, eyes fluttering shut with a sigh when your nails gently scrape over his scalp.
“That’s it, rest up,” Wooyoung says with a soft smile and an even softer shine in his eyes. “We got you. Feeling a little better?”
San nods sluggishly, exhaustion radiating from his every pore as he sinks a little deeper into you.
Wooyoung chuckles as he watches San curl up against you, and rubs an affectionate hand over San’s thigh. “But not back completely, are you? Hmm, what do you need?” He taps his bottom lip in thought, the question more to himself than to San; then an idea brightens up his eyes. “How about I make you some proper food, get something warm in that stomach? Sound good?”
San makes a vaguely ‘yes’-shaped noise, tiredly smiling up at Wooyoung.
“Alright, then I’ll handle that, okay Sannie? Just means I got to step into the kitchen for a minute, but you won’t be alone.” Wooyoung’s eyes flicker up to you, giving you a quick wink. “I am leaving you in very capable hands. Give you two a chance to chat, hm?”
Before you even get the chance to offer whipping up a meal instead (after all, Wooyoung is the resident expert at helping San through a drop, not you), Wooyoung is on his feet and pulling on some clothes.
“I’ll leave the door open, alright? Just give a shout if you need me, I’ll be back like that,” he says, snapping his fingers. Wooyoung leans in to give San a last kiss on the cheek, sweet with a tint of playfulness, then steps away out of the bedroom.
It’s just you and San now.
You take in a deep breath and then release it, squeezing your arms a little tighter around San. “Look at you, getting a home-made meal out of this. Lucky guy,” you try to joke, poking his cheek.
San’s shoulders shake lightly with a quiet laugh. “Seriously, the lengths I have to go to to get fed properly around here,” he sighs, looking up at you with an exaggerated pout. But San can’t hold on to the lighthearted moment, his pout fading into a pained wince. “Sorry about all this. Never meant to cause trouble.”
“San, don’t you dare apologise!” you gently scold him. “We look after each other around here. What’d you do if it was me or Wooyoung?”
“…I’d look after you.”
“Yeah you would. You always do,” you press on. “And you wouldn’t let us call it ‘trouble’ either.”
“No, I wouldn’t,” San sighs, admitting defeat. “No apologies.”
But knowing he doesn’t have to be sorry, and actually not feeling sorry, are two very different beasts — and it’s pretty clear which one San’s dealing with. Something sharp pinches in your chest as you remember what San stammered out in distress.
“Are you hurt? Did— did I—?”
Is that still on his mind? Does he really think he could ever…?
“San, do you even—”
The words catch in your throat as you catch San’s eyes. They’re no longer hollowed out, but there is a vast ocean of emotion behind them — and San is in safe waters for now, but all it takes is one dangerous wave for him to be pulled under again.
You won’t let him. You won’t.
“San,” you say again, your voice steadier this time. It’s disquieting, how a man with such wide shoulders can look so small. “I always feel so safe with you, you know that?”
He nods, smiling faintly. “I know,” he says, but there is not enough conviction behind it to your liking.
“And do you also know,” you say with an exaggerated sigh, wrapping your legs around San’s waist, “how nervous I was when we had that first negotiation, back when we started this whole thing? It was just you and me, and I still felt so fucking embarrassed about barging in on you and Woo. I was this close to skipping town and starting my whole life over in a new country.”
San can’t help a chuckle. (You’re taking it as a victory.) “Knew you were nervous. Didn’t know it was that bad.”
“Oh yeah, it was that bad for sure,” you laugh breathily, patting San’s chest. “Only thing holding me back was that I couldn’t decide on a new identity. So many options!”
“What, that was the only thing?” San asks, and gives you a cheeky side-eye despite his exhaustion.
“Eh, maybe there was this pair of hotties that had something to do with it too,” you tease, dramatically rolling your eyes at San before you go serious again. “But that’s not the point. The point is… all of those nerves were gone by the time I walked out the door. Because of you.”
There is nothing cheeky about San’s gaze this time.
“You made me feel so at ease, like I could trust you with anything,” you say quietly, ignoring the prickle behind your eyes when San leans his head against your shoulder, nuzzling into you. “Like I’d always be safe with you, no matter what — and you’ve proven me right every damn day since then.”
A serene hush follows as San quietly takes hold of your words. He no longer looks adrift in the ocean, pulled along by a new current that carries him safely ashore.
It’s a comfortable silence — until a light mrrp comes from the doorway, announcing Byeol’s arrival.
“Hey look, reinforcements are here,” you joke while Byeol pads over to the foot of the bed. For a moment you only see the swish of her dark tail, then she hops onto the bed, sheets lightly scrunching underfoot as she makes a direct line towards San. A cat on a mission.
You untangle your legs from San’s waist to give Byeol a comfy spot to lie down in. San smiles softly as the Thai cat circles a few times in his lap, bumping her head against your hand before she settles in. Contently, she kneads biscuits into San’s robe, and starts purring loudly when he gently scritches at her exposed, fluffy tummy.
You sit like that for a while; with San patting Byeol while you idly run your fingers through his hair, like a little braid train of affection. It’s quiet, comfortable, minutes passing by unhurried until the silence is finally broken by San.
“…I think I’m alright now,” he says, his smile steady, and a shimmer in his eyes that isn’t underlined with distress. “Thanks. For being here.”
“Anytime, Sannie,” you say, resting your forehead against his temple. “Whatever you need, we got you.”
“Damn right we do,” a sudden voice says from the door opening.
You blink in surprise when you see Wooyoung leaned against the frame, watching you and San. He is slightly obscured by shadows in the dimmed bedroom, but his smile shines through brightly; how long has he been standing there?
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“I always feel so safe with you, you know that?”
Wooyoung hadn’t meant to listen in. He’d just sidled up to the bedroom with Byeol in his arms, thinking to provide San some extra company. Then he caught a wisp of conversation, and thought it’d be better to hang back for a minute.
‘Hanging back’ isn’t usually Wooyoung’s style — and neither is leaving San’s side after a dom drop. But today, it just seemed like the right move. For San, and for you.
After all, Wooyoung hadn’t missed how quiet you went after San dropped.
It’s not that you weren’t taking good care of San; Wooyoung also hadn’t missed how you held onto him so tight he couldn’t slip out of reach if he tried. Soothing touches to keep San grounded in the room so he could hear the words Wooyoung was saying to him.
But San needed words from you too.
Wooyoung still isn’t sure why you took a backseat and let him take the lead; maybe you were shaken by seeing San like this — or maybe you were worried about saying the wrong thing? Well, Wooyoung definitely hadn’t worried about that. You’d find the words to say.
Now he quietly listens in as the words come to you, just like he’d known, with a dismantling sincerity against which San’s darker thoughts don’t stand a damn chance.
“—and you’ve proven me right every damn day since then.”
Wooyoung grins, giving himself a mental pat on the back for making the right call. He lowers Byeol to the ground and ushers her into the bedroom, then decides to give you and San just a moment longer.
He heads back into the kitchen to grab the little bowl of food he whipped up. Nothing grand or fancy, just some stir-fried kimchi with leftover rice, a quick fried egg on top.
Then Wooyoung finally slips inside the bedroom. He pauses at what he sees inside.
Fuck, he wishes he was holding a camera.
Something about the homely sight of you and San cuddled up with Byeol just looks… right.
San pats the Byeol with a calm, pensive expression. If Wooyoung knows anything about San, his mind is still lingering on the freshly imbued assurance from you and Wooyoung; that you never feel anything but safe and cared for with him. Gently he prods at the bauble of knowledge in his head, to make sure it doesn’t slip out of his grasp again.
It won’t — your hold on him is too secure for that.
You are sweetly playing with San’s hair, the strength of your devotion plainly written all over your face in bold all-caps letters. Wooyoung knows your affection for them is not romantically inclined, but god it’s so obvious that you care. You care so deeply.
As for the nature of his own inclinations, Wooyoung tries to not examine those too closely. It’s not like ‘conformity’ has defined a lot of his past relationships anyway. As far as he’s concerned, it’s more important how he acts on his wants and feelings, than how he labels them. And watching you and San together? He can hardly complain about how the three of you are acting on things now.
An unbidden smile curves around his lips at the soft intimacy on display, his stomach clenching oddly.
(It’s not jealousy, he tells himself.)
(Well. Maybe a little bit of jealousy, he quickly amends. Wooyoung is never one to pretend he does not want to be wanted.)
“…I think I’m alright now,” San says, and Wooyoung doesn’t realise he’d been lost in a daze until the words shake him out of it. “Thanks. For being here.”
“Anytime, Sannie,” you assure him, and Wooyoung warms at your smile. “Whatever you need, we got you.”
Ah, that seems like just the right opening. “Damn right we do,” Wooyoung says with a grin. “Got you some food, San. Want to come out, or eat it here?”
San perks up when he sees the bowl of food, but has no desire to get out of the bed yet; so you and San free up space for Wooyoung to join you instead. (His flinch of jealousy relaxes at this proof of want.)
Byeol is the only one who makes complaints, miffed at being ignored by San over a hot meal. But she is easily mollified when Wooyoung lifts her from San’s lap into his own, where his attentions soon have her purring contently again.
San makes an appreciative noise as he digs into the simple meal, his face scrunching up with every mouthful of food. While he empties out the bowl, you and Wooyoung catch each others’ eyes, exchanging a satisfied nod. San is alright now.
After the food is gone, San decides to take a cold shower, just for good measure to snap himself fully out of it. Wooyoung takes this opportunity to change the sheets, so he and San get to sleep with fresh linen tonight. You watch him with Byeol in your arms, taking your turn as kitty-custodian very seriously.
“Not gonna help me out here?” Wooyoung asks, giving you a massive side-eye just to be dramatic.
“I’m busy!” you counter, slightly raising Byeol up. “Hey, um.”
“Um?”
“I want to stay over tonight. Sleep here. If that’s alright with you and San.”
Wooyoung blinks at you in surprise, but quickly breaks out in a wide smile. That was about the last thing he expected you to say. “Yeah, of course!”
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And so San and Wooyoung happily welcomed you into their bed — and not for a tumble between the sheets, for once.
It’s been a while since you last slept in the same bed with someone, let alone two someone’s, one of whom had pulled you into his firm chest, arms wrapped around you. (Bare arms. You had picked up some sleep clothes from home and Wooyoung has a comfy flannel pyjama set, but San apparently can’t sleep unless he’s wearing nothing but a pair of fitted boxers.)
You weren’t shocked to discover that San is a cuddler in bed; he’s prone to clinginess during the day, why would it be any different at night?
Tragically, the men’s company did not by some strange magic make this the best sleep you’ve had in years. As familiar as San’s bedroom is to you, as familiar as you are with the feel and scent of his and Wooyoung’s presence, you’re so unused to sharing your bedspace that instead of falling sound asleep, you drift in-and-out of a restless slumber.
No, you aren’t exactly convinced to make a regular habit out of this ‘staying overnight’ thing, but… for now? You really don’t care about any of that.
You’re not sure when you made the decision to sleep over; maybe it was two seconds before telling Wooyoung, maybe two seconds after you realised San was in trouble. You just know you want to be right next to San in the morning, so you can see with your own eyes if he is okay or if he needs anything. Your protective instinct is too strong to be thwarted by some mild discomfort.
The night passes, and finally you drift back into full consciousness with a faint beam of sunlight shining through a narrow slit in San’s blackout curtains. Shaking off your slumber, you faintly register that your face is pressed against two comfortable, firm pillows.
Ah wait. No. Not pillows.
San’s chest.
Well, same difference, really.
Somehow you’re more deeply entangled than you started out the night; San clings tightly onto you with a leg slung over your waist, and you can feel Wooyoung’s arms snaked around him in turn. There is a light pout on San’s face and he snores softly, his breath falling against the top of your head — which could have been endearing, if your mind hadn’t just cleared up enough to identify an out-of-place hardness pressed against your stomach.
Oh.
You hadn’t thought this far ahead, last night, but… yeah, makes sense.
Groggily you try to slip out of San’s arms without waking him, but you freeze up when he shifts and babbles something incoherent. His hold tightens on pure instinct; San is still knocked out in deep sleep.
For a moment you are caught in indecision, unsure what to do.
You’ve grown comfortable in your routines in this dynamic, but this lies outside those usual patterns. An old unease cranes its neck up at the break in routine; the worry that you trespassing on their relationship in a space that is not for you — but you firmly slap back those out-dated insecurities.
The reason why you’ve never been in this situation before is because of your boundaries, not theirs.
“Hey, are you getting up already?” a hoarse voice whispers from behind San when you shift to try and find a position where his dick doesn’t poke you right in the stomach. Wooyoung lifts his head, bleary dark eyes peeking up from above San’s slumbering figure. “We can sleep in, there’s no rush.”
“Not in a rush,” you whisper back. “San is just— um—”
“Ah.”
Judging by Wooyoung’s quick understanding, this must be a pretty common situation. His hand wanders down to brush over the crotch of San’s boxers, who sighs a moan even at the faint contact.
(The moan makes a compelling argument on why you might stay overnight more often after all.)
“So… the way I see it, we got two options,” Wooyoung murmurs, his voice thick with leftover sleep. “Either we rescue you from mister cuddle-monster’s grapple, or… we could wake Sannie up, see if he wants any help with that.”
His hand rests on San’s lower abdomen, not moving while he waits for your response.
You bite your lip, definitely not averse to lending San a hand, so to speak. “He’d be okay with that? With me too?”
“Only one way to find out,” Wooyoung says, giving you a languid grin, “but… let’s just say I have it on good authority that San will probably be more than okay.”
“‘Good authority’, huh?” you say, and a faint heat creeps under your skin at the implication they talked about this very scenario, about you. By now you’d think that they lost some of their ability to fluster you, but no, you don’t think you’ll ever build up a full immunity to the impact of San and Wooyoung. (You can’t really bring yourself to mind.) “Then… yeah.”
Wooyoung presses a kiss on the solid muscles of San’s shoulder, waking him with a few gentle nips of teeth.
“Nmhn, ‘Youngie?” San’s eyes flutter open, groggy and disoriented, but his confusion melts into a soft smile when he realises who he’s holding in his arms. “Hey. Good morning.”
“Good morning yourself,” you whisper. Even with everyone awake, somehow it still feels wrong to raise your voice too high in the darkened bedroom, with the faint chirrups of birds outside. “How’re you doing?”
San lets out a tired groan, shifting to stretch some of the sleep out of his body. But it’s not an unhappy groan, a distinctly feline curve to the edges of his smile. He turns his head to nuzzle at Wooyoung, while simultaneously pulling you back closer into him.
You can see the exact moment on San’s face where he wakes up enough to realise he’s pulled you right back against his half-hard boner.
“Shit, sorry—” he begins to stammer, but you gently shush him, pressing a finger to his lips.
“It’s okay, Sannie,” you assure him. “Seriously, it’s fine.”
(There is something weirdly adorable about a guy being so self-conscious about his morning wood when he’s had his dick inside your body’s horny trinity of holes more times than you care to count.)
“Actually,” Wooyoung chimes in, planting another kiss on San’s shoulder, “we were thinking…” His lips trail up San’s neck. “…how about we take care of that for you, hm?”
San draws in a shaky breath as Wooyoung palms his cock, putting light pressure on the crotch of his boxers. “Y-you already took care of me yesterday,” he protests, weakly. “You don’t have to—”
“We want to, San,” you say. “This isn’t out of obligation or anything.” You press a gentle kiss on his chest, then glance up to him. “So… what do you want?”
He swallows, his Adam’s apple bobbing in the dim light. “Yeah,” San says quietly. “Want to be taken care of.”
That’s all Wooyoung needs to hear.
San lets out a shuddery sigh, mouth falling slack as Wooyoung starts moving his hand with slow, languid strokes.
For a moment you just watch them, savouring the sight of San, the biggest people pleaser you know, being pleased by Wooyoung. You always cherish these times, when the roles reverse and San lets himself go, lets go of responsibility and control. Reciprocating the trust you and Wooyoung always put in him.
“How’s that, Sannie?” Wooyoung asks, and there is also something equally worth savouring about the sight of him like this, doting and attentive to the person who so often attends to his every need. Wooyoung is greedy in bed, never shy about his many wants — but he is equally generous, giving all of himself to his partners.
“Hm, ‘s good…” San mumbles, wiggling lazily into Wooyoung’s chest.
You can’t keep your eyes off them, completely entranced by how San’s breaths slowly get heavier, soft moans blending into his exhales. His head lolls back against Wooyoung’s shoulder with a whine, exposing the tantalising column of his neck to you.
The magnetic pull of San’s bared throat is too strong to resist, the scattering of freckles there begging to be kissed.
San shudders as your lips gently press against the prominent mole just under his jaw. You take great care to lavish every speck on his star-clustered skin with attention, where you can feel his moans reverberate against your mouth.
Everything starts to melt together in the morning daze, bodies half-covered under the sheets as San rolls his hips into Wooyoung’s hand, gasping when you suck another kiss into his freckled neck. He holds your onto waist, more to steady himself than anything else, but his fingers dig in a little harder when you slowly move down to his chest.
San’s whines grow louder as your teeth graze against his nipple, flicking it with small kitten licks until you start to suck in earnest. His firm tits provide you with generous handfuls of meaty muscle, tensing under your palms as your hands squeeze at him.
Sometimes you’d almost forget just how incredibly sensitive San is, a fact often obscured by his complete control in the bedroom. Even the lightest touches are capable of driving him up the wall, and soon he’s writhing between you and Wooyoung, eyes squeezed shut in pleasure.
“Such a good boy you are for us,” Wooyoung coos at San, teasing him with a good-natured grin. “Want me to edge you? Would you like that, Sannie?”
San turns his head to look at Wooyoung; there’s a wet gleam in his eyes, but he nods eagerly. “Want it, yeah.”
Wooyoung lifts his hand up to his mouth, doing his best to be covert as he spits into his palm, like he does not want to disturb the softness of the moment with something as crude as a little extra lubrication. He then reaches back under the covers — where San sucks in a sharp breath as Wooyoung slides his hand underneath the waistband of San’s boxers.
San groans, unable to stay still with two pairs of hands roaming over his body, and two mouths exploring just as eagerly. Wooyoung has replaced your lips on San’s neck, mouthing at a reddened mark you left earlier, while you suck a wet trail between his pecs.
San mewls when you thumb at his nipples, giving them a light pinch. His body jerks, but there is still a clear purpose to the way he shifts one leg forward, pressing his thigh against your clothed crotch.
It’s an unmistakable invitation, one that you are keen to accept.
You slowly start to grind on San’s thick thigh, the double fabric layer of your panties and sleep shorts dragging against your clit. It’s little more but a light burn, not enough to get you off, but you appreciate it all the same.
“So sweet, our Sannie,” you giggle. (For real, the biggest people pleaser you know.) “We are supposed to take care of you, remember?”
He whines in protest, pressing his thigh harder into your cunt while simultaneously pushing his ass back against Wooyoung. Another obvious invitation.
“Aw, he just can’t help himself, can you San?” Wooyoung rasps with a wicked smile. “He likes to pretend he’s a big ol’ meanie, but he just doesn’t know what to do with himself if he’s not making us feel good.”
San whines again, in agreement this time, squirming between you and Wooyoung.
“Already making me feel so good,” you sigh, softly kissing San’s flushed sternum. “Just feel that, all from getting to take care of you.”
You pry his hand from your waist, pushing it down your shorts and panties to let him swipe at the wetness clinging to your folds. He groans throatily and immediately tries to hone in on your clit — but you tsk and yank him back.
“Nuh-uh, Sannie,” you chide him gently. “That’s not how things work today. Just be here with us, that’s all we need you to do.”
“Th-then— wanna feel— ngh p-please, wanna—” San’s voice is choked up, his touch clumsy as he hooks his thumb underneath the waistbands of your clothes and tries to tug them down. “F-fuck, please—”
His desperation sears hotly through you, refusing to be denied. You shimmy out of your clothes and kick them off, now naked from the bottom down. The motion drags the covers further downward — and now you can actually see the obscene bulge in San’s boxers as Wooyoung jerks him off, the outline of his fist moving at a steady pace.
San’s breath hitches with every stroke, his eyes gleaming with unshed tears. Still babbling pleas at you, his hands kneading at your sides as he shoves his thigh back between yours. He glances at Wooyoung too, arching his back in a not-subtle reminder of what he needs.
“Shh, don’t move, Sannie,” you shush him, running a hand through his mussed up hair. “Just let us use you, that’s all you have to do.”
“Do it, please, do it, hmgh, wanna feel you make a mess on me, wanna be good…” A thick tear escapes San’s lashes, streaking down his puffy cheek.
“Aw, so polite for such a dirty boy,” Wooyoung teases fondly. There is nothing but pure adoration in his eyes as he lightly rolls his hips forward. “Asking us so nicely to cum all over you. Who could ever say no to that, hm?”
You certainly couldn’t. And so you lift your leg just enough for San’s thigh to slide neatly in-between, allowing him to feel the wet heat of your cunt right against the beefy muscle.
San bites his lip to try (and fail) to stifle a high-pitched whine as your arousal smears over him with every drag of your hips. He groans petulantly when Wooyoung stops stroking him, but it’s only so Wooyoung can take off his own pyjama pants, and tugs down San’s boxers just enough for his cock to smack wetly against his stomach.
Then Wooyoung’s fingers are wrapped around San’s thick length again and his eyes flutter shut, face contorting in pleasure as he struggles to keep still between the two bodies rutting against him. Wooyoung breathes heavily, moving his hand faster as he grinds into San’s backside.
“That’s it, Sannie, just a little more,” Wooyoung says, his voice tightly wound. “You’re getting close, aren’t you?”
“Mhm, y-yeah.” San is rapidly losing his restraint, his trimmed nails digging into the soft flesh of your waist, fingers slotted over your stretch marks. Whiny moans stumble off his lips in freefall, his thigh clenching under your clit as heady arousal fills the early morning air.
Earlier, you didn’t think you were going to cum. You’re not even really trying now, despite San’s request; too focused on your worship of his body. Languidly, you rub your clit against his flexing muscle, so distracted by teasing his nipples and sucking at the swell of his cleavage that you fail to realise how close you are getting yourself. The coiling pressure creeps up on you — but like a gear locking into place, you stumble on just the right angle and you’re so drunk on pleasing San and he’s whimpering and heat lances through your cunt and oh god—
Right as you are tipping over, Wooyoung takes his hand off San’s cock, denying him the very rush that is flooding your senses. You spasm against San, his choked up sob feeding into your pleasure as fresh slick leaks onto his leg. The slide against his glistening thigh is so easy by now, and you breathlessly ride out your high in the company of San’s snivelled whines.
“Where do you want me, Sannie?” Wooyoung asks with hard, raspy gasps, not far off from his own release. “Here? On your tits? Mouth?”
San makes a strangled noise, shaking his head like he’s embarrassed to say it out loud, but eventually stammers, “T-tits.”
Immediately, Wooyoung pushes San onto his back and straddles his thighs — one glossy with your slick. A thin, bright beam of sunlight falls right across San’s face and chest, highlighting the beautiful flush of skin, beads of sweat gathering on his brow and sternum. There are tear-streaks on his face, and a wet smear on his stomach where the tip of his cock rests, oozing pre-cum.
With Wooyoung snugly sitting in his lap, letting out rapid, pitched breaths as he jerks himself off with purposeful strokes, San’s instincts to be helpful bubble up again. He reaches to touch Wooyoung — but you quickly intervene, pinning San’s wrists above his head. It’s startlingly effective; San instantly goes lax under your hold. He melts into the bed with a shuddered breath, like the thought of pushing back does not even occur to him.
(A good thing, because there’s no doubt on your mind that San could easily break free. Eyeing the width of his biceps, you swear he must’ve been spending more time at the gym lately.)
“Keep those hands right where they are, mister,” you order playfully, grinning at San. “No touching.”
San sulks at you, but the gleam in his eyes gives him away. He’s clearly eating this whole thing up; half turned on and half amused by how you and Wooyoung have taken control. “Fine,” he pouts cutely. “I’ll behave.”
“Good boy,” you purr, immediately testing San’s obedience by releasing his wrists to wrap your hand around his cock. San hisses in sensitivity as you tease your thumb at the leaking slit, but he stays in place as ordered.
“Fuck, that’s hot,” Wooyoung groans, drawing your attention back to him.
Like you, Wooyoung is only naked from the waist down. It looks a little silly, a little cute; domesticity dripping off him with his flannel pyjama top and sleep-mussed hair — all while he works himself up to a quick orgasm with the lewd squelches of his fist pumping his dick. Wooyoung bites his lip as he stares down at San, lying utterly pliant beneath him and just taking what you’re willing to give.
And what you give, is enough to get San whiny and squirming again, fighting not to buck into your hand; but not enough to let him cum before Wooyoung does.
Thankfully for him, Wooyoung does not need much longer.
Wooyoung leans forward, steadying himself with a hand on San’s hip. His breath comes out in sharp gasps, dark eyes transfixed on San’s heaving chest and the light bruises you’ve left scattered all over him. “S-so fucking good for us, Sannie,” he moans, a crack in his voice. “Ah, ‘m gonna— ah, fuck, ahh—”
His hips stutter as he grunts, nails digging into San’s waist to keep himself from doubling over as he shoots messy ropes of cum over San’s chest. Some reaching all the way up his neck, adding their white glisten to San’s flushed, sweaty skin. He hisses a curse that transforms into a low moan when you eagerly lap up a rivulet between his pecs, then follow a trail to his nipple.
Wooyoung pants heavily, his dark hair sticking to his face as he catches his breath. “Shit, you two…” he groans, watching how you leisurely mouth at San’s fevered skin, your hand still keeping a steady pace. “How about it, baby, shall we let Sannie have his turn now?”
San bites down a whimper, his back arching as his fingers dig into the mattress.
You hum in agreement and move your hand a little quicker. In contrast, you slowly work your way up San’s neck, pressing a few light kisses up his chin until you reach the corner of his mouth.
San knows exactly what you are offering him — and he greedily accepts, tilting his head to meet your lips full-on. He groans as you suck his tongue into your mouth, sharing his seed between you. The combination of cum and faint morning breath is not the most pleasant, but kissing San is always sweet regardless of taste.
Meanwhile, Wooyoung lends a helping hand (or rather, a mouth) by sliding down the bed and wrap his lips around San’s cockhead. He works his jaw with thick sweeps of his tongue, just tending to the tip while you handle the rest of San’s thick length.
You consume his every muffled curse, every strangled whine, until San is trembling, so lost in pleasure he no longer has the presence of mind to respond to your kiss. You suckle on his bottom lip and reach your hand further down to cup San’s balls and squeeze gently, unable to help a moan of your own when San lets out a broken sob at the touch.
“W-Woo— Wooyoung— I-I— Fuck—”
San tries to warn him — which Wooyoung only takes as an invitation to sink further down on his cock, throat bobbing as he swallows greedily.
Together you ease San through it, hands rubbing over his shivering body as he whines and convulses, bucking up into Wooyoung’s mouth, until all tension melts away. San relaxes into the bed, rendered boneless as he catches his breath. There is a dopey, tired smile on San’s face, and finally he reaches for you and Wooyoung, pulling you into his broad chest as he slowly recovers, perfectly content.
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This time, it’s you who is changing the sheets.
“So, how was it? Sleeping over?” San asks when he walks back into the bedroom after freshening up. He looks none the worse for wear after yesterday’s ordeal, a renewed lightness to his shoulders as he towels off his damp hair.
You chuckle sheepishly. “Honestly? The sleeping part was kind of terrible,” you admit. “Nothing personal! Just not great with sharing blankets. But the waking up… Yeah, the waking up part was pretty damn amazing. And that is personal.”
“Knew it. You hear that Sannie? She’s only using us for sex,” Wooyoung jokes, pinching your side as he walks past behind you to grab his phone from the nightstand.
“Don’t think so lowly of yourself, Woo,” you huff. “I also use you for your cooking.”
“What about me?” San asks, giving you a playful pout. “Just sex then?”
You finish yanking off the sheets and gather it together into a bundle, then stand up straight, tapping your lip in thought. “Hmm…” you say, giving San a scrutinising look-over. “Hugs. You give good hugs.”
San brightens like the sun breaking through cloudcover, delighted at your ‘use’ for him. He immediately ambushes you from behind, arms wrapping tightly around your waist as he rubs his chin against your shoulder.
“Aish! Seriously?” Wooyoung complaints, and you yelp when he pinches your side a little harder this time around.
“You started it, you idiot,” you laugh, gently untangling yourself from San. You hand him the bundle of sheets, dirtied with sweat and slick, and grab a fresh set.
San sulks at the bed linen in his arms. “Can’t believe we had to change to change sheets again,” he grouses. “I have so much more laundry with you two around, it’s ridiculous.”
Wooyoung just snorts. “What are you talking about? Don’t try to put this on us, you’re the one who doesn’t believe in laying down a towel.”
“Don’t like the feel of them,” San mumbles through pursed lips. “Besides, those dang things always seem to shift out of place at the worst moment anyway. What’s the point, except even more laundry?”
You shake your head at his complaints, but it’s pure affection. Meanwhile, Wooyoung sidles up behind San and takes his turn hugging him. “I could help out more, you know. Move in, share the load. The laundry load.”
San blinks in surprise, turning his head to look at Wooyoung, while you look up curiously, pausing your task of wrangling sheets around the corner of the mattress. Is Wooyoung serious, or is this just his usual messing around?
But judging by his calm expression, Wooyoung is one hundred percent serious. He sways back and forth on the balls of his feet, rocking San in his hug — but his eyes are completely focused, watching for San’s reaction.
“I mean… you practically live here already,” San says, reaching back his arms to hold onto Wooyoung’s hips, steady him a little. “We’d just be making it official, right?”
“Yeah! That’s what I wanna do, make it official,” Wooyoung says, then catches you off-guard by turning to you. “How about it? How do you feel about getting me as your official neighbour?”
You let out an abashed laugh, already self-conscious to be in the room for this conversation between them, let alone involved. “Why are you asking me? I’m not the one you’re moving in with!”
Wooyoung shrugs. “Just felt right to check in,” he says, so matter-of-factly that the lump of awkwardness in your chest softens. He’s not treating your input on the matter like a laugh; and for a moment, you find yourself at a loss for how to respond. To be considered in a big life choice like this — a relationship choice — is not something that’s ever happened to you before.
A jumble of feelings bounces around in your chest; but they’re led at the helm by happiness, and a wide, giddy smile has curved around your lips before you even realise it’s happening.
Warmth bursts through your veins as you nod at San and Wooyoung, who’re both smiling back at you. “Yeah,” you say, feeling oddly shy. “I’d love to have you here, officially. Welcome home, Woo.”
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royaltea000 · 1 year ago
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I hope you don't mind answering these questions. I've become very invested in your spidersonas. Does Gacy also live in Myanmar with Pingkuu? Is Gacy also burmese or wasian or is he living there as an English/American immigrant(im assuming off the name)? :0 or this like a "theyre from different dimensions but end up meeting due to circumstances" situation? also... boyfriends? 👀
Hope this wasn't too much ^^
Oh my gosh thank you so much for your interest that makes me so happy!! 😭💕
In my mind they live in separate universes I made them completely independent from each other - Pingkuu was made cuz I wanted to see a Spider-Man of my ethnicity and Gacy was based more of me as a person lol
Gacy is in fact wasian how did you know?! He lives with his dad’s side of the family in Chinatown, San Francisco
Pingkuu is a kind of dark vigilante who is both feared and respected by the common people he protects and is more of a horror story because the people he goes after are more of the worst of the worst or people with influence who can just pay their way out of jail and when he catches them they just disappear forever. Maybe someone will catch a glimpse of them but they will look suspiciously wooden. He is part of the spiderverse and likes to act like a lifeless limp doll in the lobby so anytime a new guy goes up to him like hey what’s this he can give them the worst jumpscare of their lives (<= asshole) A lot of people don’t really approve of his methods tho since he’s not adverse to killing or torture of criminals. Not a lot of people know this but he’s made his own underground prison where he keeps influential criminals who keep escaping punishment, often government officials so he is very wanted by the state.
Gacy is also part of the spiderverse and I think they’d actually get along great now that you mention it. They’re both mischievous and based off my desire to see horror elements in spidersonas (like imagine getting wrapped in skin would that be freaky or what) but Gacy gets spends more time with my friend’s sona Suispider they’re best buddies <3 I like to think Pingkuu and Gacy went on a mission together once and the poor villain of the week will never psychologically recover :(
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ggthydrangea · 2 years ago
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jisung is very cute 🥺 it’s funny but my office actually has a picture of a quokka above our printer (for some reason) and it makes me laugh bc it makes me think of him haha
i started out as an nct fan because around 3 yrs ago, one of my friends back in college showed me their mv for the 7th sense (still so good if u havent seen it) and i was intrigued bc it was so diff from what i thought kpop sounded like!! my hs friends had shown me svt videos (like pretty u) but i was like eh idk if this is for me…and look at me now hahaha. besides nct and skz, i also like txt, svt, day6, p1h and then there are a bunch of groups whose stuff i like and will listen to but i dont rly know anything about them yet! how about you, do you mostly follow skz and sf9? it does take a lot for me to get into a group fully so for the longest time i was just into nct bc i was like 23 men is enough for me 😂 i think now i like nct and skz the most, i like the other groups too but it takes a lot to reach top tier for me lol idk how to explain it but i feel like theres also an emotional aspect to it LOL like im not sure why exactly skz hit for me more than txt for example (though i also love txt) but it just happened 😂
it’s funny because back in 2020 a friend sent me some skz stuff and i was like oh gods menu and back door are dope but i was like idk if the rest of their stuff is my style hahahahaha and now i love that shit 🤣 i think nct noise music changed my music taste (for the better hehe)
THATS SO FUN u got to see skz live 🥺🥺 was it amazing?? im also in the US and im waiting for the day they come back on tour so i can see them (and lino 🥲) with my own eyeballs hahah. i went to kcon la this summer and technically saw skz live but i didnt know who they were at the time 😭 have u seen any other kpop groups? kcon la was actually my first kpop concert since i got into kpop back in 2020 and i’ve been to svt and nct127 concerts since which were both amazing 🫶 it must be so tiring but also exhilarating to perform and have ppl sing along to ur songs especially when it’s in an entirely diff language for the audience members
Haha that's so funny! A little Jisung reminder in your office! 🥺
Ooo yeah! I think The 7th Sense was my first NCT song too, it's so good!!! Do you have a favorite unit for NCT? What are your favorite songs? Who's your bias?
Those are some good groups to listen to!!! I totally get you on having a lot of groups that you listen to but don't follow. Yes at this point skz and SF9 are my main groups! I used to also be really into BTS, but with how little new music they've been putting out I kinda lost some interest, but I still love their music a lot! I'm the same, it takes so much for me to become fully invested in a group!!! For years it was just BTS and SF9, so I was kinda surprised when I got into skz as much as I did, but I'm really glad cause I've met so many cool people because of skz and I really love their music and the impact they've had on my life!!! Sometimes it just be that way, it's so hard to predict what your brain and heart will latch onto. 😔
Yeah, skz is definitely a group where you gotta be okay with a bit of noise! XD
Yes it was so cool!!! I loved it so much they're so amazing on stage!!! During their songs that didn't have choreo Chan was bopping around the stage and it was so so cute. 🥰 And in general they're such good performers!!! Oh my gosh that means you got to see Yeah live I'm so jealous 😭😭😭 That's so cool that you've gotten to go to concerts!!! I've been into kpop since 2016 and I've only been to two concerts, I don't get much kpop within driving distance. 🥲
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lotti-lyric · 2 years ago
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Hi I just found your blog and I love it! Could I please have a romantic MHA male matchup?💕 (pronouns: she/her) I would be okay with any heroes / villians / students
I’m 22, I’m a Capricorn sun (cancer moon and libra rising) I have brown eyes and bright pink dyed hair - I love art like drawing and painting, art history, and baking!
I HATE bugs and I cry if one is ever near me lol. Other pet peeves: people walking really slow in front of me, people coughing in public without covering up
I’m very empathetic and always trying to lighten the mood and make people happy. I’m very chill and don’t have problems with anyone (unless they’re rude or mean to me or my friends) I can’t stand people who are rude ignorant. I’m super indecisive and need a lot of validation. A quirk someone gave me once was reality warping (kinda like the scarlet witch) and they said I would have like choatic / trickster type vibes (like loki) and that’s my dream quirk.
I’m b l i n d so always wearing my glasses haha also I love having a sense of humor. I also have anxiety and can be way too emotional sometimes. I’m an ENFP & also I love tie dye clothes, makeup, and everything pastel.
Sorry if this is way too much !!! thank you sm :)
charlotte’s interlude!!💗- AHHHH my first request!! hi love, tysm, it means the world!! i’m so glad you like my blog!! 💗😭 you sound like such a fun person oh my GOD!! all matchups and requests are open so feel free to send stuff in!! lots of love, thanks again!! 🌸🦋✨
warnings; food, swearing, anxiety mention, and bugs
i match you with…
Taishiro Toyomitsu (aka Fatgum!!)
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⊱ ────── {⋅. ♪ .⋅} ────── ⊰
THIS SONG IS YALL ^^
SAID WHAT I SAID
oh my gosh so the first time you guys meet
talk about love at first SIGHT
he’s such a genuine and nice guy so he was LIVING for your empathy!! he saw you helping a stranger who had fallen over
first thing he noticed, def ur glasses!! HE THINKS THEYRE FUCKING ADORABLE OH MY GOD
once you guys are together bestie invest in some contacts bc he’s gonna be wearing those 90% of the time 💀
“Taishi, baby, I need those to SEE-“
“OH RIGHT IM SO SORRY BEAUTIFUL-“
before he even knows you very well, he’s already giving a lot of validation!! he’s always complimenting you on your makeup or your groovy asf tie dye fits!!
one of his biggest fears is that while using your quirk, you’ll get hurt or enter another reality altogether
he just wants to be with you 🥺
YALL GO TO THSOE POTTERY WHERE U PAINT THE LITTLE CERAMICS ALL THE TIME AND HES SO SHIT AT IT BUT DOZENS R ON THE SHELF OF UR APARTMENT
if it’s ok with you, he def appreciates your baking, especially for help with his quirk!! like it tastes fuckin fire and he needs to eat anyways!!
earned the title of the bug slayer!! they’re gone before you can even see them!! if you were to start crying, he would hold you and pet your hair (which he LOVES BTW), just understanding
“I know baby… it’s ok.. I won’t let anything get you!!”
he’s very very supportive and always makes sure you’re comfortable in every situation!!
he’s big on giving you hugs from behind and you guys definitely have “your song” together 🥺
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kithtaehyung · 2 years ago
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RYEN!
gosh .. how do i even begin with the more mv.. that man was not hobi .. it was HOSEOK. im so in love with his outfit it definitely ranks second before his dior outfit!
if someone told me he was going to do a semi rock concept in his song i would tell them THEY���RE CRAZY, DELUSIONAL, AND INSANE?? because who WOULD’VE GUESSED ?? his voice, his flow, his rhythm, everything about that song deserves all the awards 🤯 im definitely more scared of the other member’s solo projects ( in a good way ofc! ) and wonder if they’ll do different concepts we would never expect from them!
also so sorry if it looked like i disappeared for a while .. 🥺 i actually “submitted” an ask but i’m not sure if i signed it off with my name or submitted it at all 😭
all i said was that i was a clown for misinterpreting 3tan yoongis line .. ( “one day” ) 🤡 my face when i realized 🤡 HES GOING IN RAW GUYS I REPEAT HES GOING IN RAW 😭 ( if im wrong again i might just need to invest in glasses ) 🤡
i also check your page regularly now that i have free time and find myself re-reading your writings for jin because im so in love with them and seokjin 🤍 i remember reading last november and jin posted on his instagram, and what was it..? A SHIRTLESS PICTURE OF HIMSELF?!!!??? the way i screamed so LOUD WOAH
oh man i could only imagine your reaction to it .. thats all i have to share for today 😇 i still need to recover from jins shirtless picture and more, lets hope this time i submitted this and signed off my name 🥹
cheers,
- 🍷
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WINE HELLOOOO i see it i see this message!! I missed you😭 don’t even get me started on the more mv bc i’m just gonna start talking about it and will not stop??? it’s so fresh and genius and none of us are prepared for what me gonna happen on July 15th.. (or for any future projects yeah🧍‍♀️)
And not just the MV. You’re right, even the song is dizzyingly intelligent in his flow and rhythm and word choice and schemes. I was reading an analysis and my head spun bc of all the things that we were missing just from the English translations being so off🫠 But I digress before I get into it💀
LMAOOO YEAH YOONGI REALLY WENT THERE WITH HIS IMPLICATION IM SCREAMING STILL!!! Goodbye I am no longer here🙃
My… reaction… to the Jin pic……………. I didn’t know whether to chuck my phone at the nearest wall or launch it off a cliff🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️ I WAS LOSING IT. IN SHAMBLES DO U UNDERSTAND?????😫 he said hot boy summer and that’s that‼️ good luck to any of us recovering from that ever🫠
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hyunjinspark · 3 years ago
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I've been going back to previous parts of the story while waiting for updates and it's making me realize why I've become so invested in this story. This is the first fanfic I've stuck around for that's more than 3 parts long and rereading it again makes me realize why. Your writing is simply amazing. I don't know how else to put it. The story is very well written, the plot is really great and the cliffhangers just keep you on the edge. The angst and the slow burn is immaculate (I know I'm constantly sobbing and complaining with every update, but I actually love it deep down). The smut/mature parts are perfect and they feel real and not super awkward and cringe (and I truly mean that because, a lot of the time, I find it very hard to find well written smut that meets my standards). Not to mention the concept of the au is very creative. Overall, as the reader I can tell that you are very passionate about what you are writing and that you put a lot of effort into giving us the best of your artistry. Thanks to you, I have one more thing to look forward to in order to get through life. For that, truly, thank you! You deserve all the warm and fuzzy hugs in the world! I hope that you are taking care of yourself the same way that you are taking care of our entertainment through this story. ❣
Sorry this is a long ask, but I wanted to sprinkle a bit of appreciation your way.
oh my gosh, thank you so much!!! don't ever apologize for long reviews, they are my favorite. thank you so much for liking my writing and for saying all those nice things 😭😭🥺 i just like to write a story how i would like to read it, cause i absolutely love reading, but when i can't find something i like, i write it myself haha.
im so glad you like the angst and slowburn !! and the smut ahhh, it's my first time writing proper smut cause i do feel like i would cringe writing certain words but i really enjoyed it writing for hyun and yn tbh, looking forward to the next one 😉
you made my week with such a lovely comment, thank you, im so happy i can give you something to look forward to.
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kpoptrashlord-007 · 2 years ago
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who are your SF9, MX, ONF, and ONEUS biases? I stan all of them <3
Sf9: Youngbinnie, hwiyoung, jaeyoon and chani I think 😭 they battle it out from time to time for 1st spot 💀
Mx: maybe Kihyun and minhyuk with a slight im sneaking in, I just remember I had a massive simp phase with kihyuk duo 💀
Onf: etion mk and Wyatt battle it out every week
Oneus: Ravn and seoho peacefully stay at 1st , hwanwoong is ready to sneak in after I watched weekly idol ep where he said he would be fine with sharing clothes with his s/o and saying he like over sized (I'm a fat @ss so this just made me go 👀👄👀👁👄👁👉👈)
DANGER ERA SANDWICH!! a little spicy ayy, omo >.< some bad boy D&E w/ their good little reader, protecting while also corrupting, a totally bad influence that broadens the reader's horizons in many, many ways T_T
Heh I'm a simp, this got my mind going, im barely getting into the shower and you give mE THESE THOUGHTS⁉️⁉️😭😭😭😭 bestie you trynna kill me 😩pls me and my friend jokingly connected all my suju dreams where it's basically a love square consisting of ryeowook and eunhae 💀 gonna be funny if another suju member just comes into my dreams like 'new challenger has appeared' 💀💀
Neck sprains T_T that's so not good!! is it from your job? I hope they don't hurt too much.
It's just a weird thing that happens to me 💀I think it's when I used my shoulder muscle too much or something and I just pull the neck from stress from the shoulder (it's hurts but I just have to wear a neck brace for a days then it should be okay)
My shoulder is fine now 😩 just was painful for a couple of days
Also, another dilf has fallen victim to my dilf agenda and idk what to do about it cuz he's older than leeteuk so it's dilf of dilfs of my dilf agenda 😭 you like old school kpop? Like h.o.t /sechskies era kpop? 😭😭
- 🍒
okay I'm gonna try this again lol. Desktop Tumblr keeps kicking me out constantly and I'm going to lose my mind at this rate. anyway
Hello my sweet 🍒! hope you are well!
Chani 🥺 (yes, I googled the emoji because nothing better expresses my love for him askjdlsf) Great picks, great taste, great biases! somehow, despite the sheer number of bands listed, we don't share any biases?? what are the odds lmfao. also mood af about Hwanwoong, you and me both, I fucking adore him T_T
I can't think of any other thoughts better for a shower hehe.
LOVE SQUARE!! Living your best y/n life omg. If more come in, it'll be a reverse harem akshjdfkg a new challenger lolol I'm invested tho, I'm rooting for another member to pop up, add a little more spice n drama to this soapie-esque dream series
oh gee, yeah, that makes sense. once you hurt one thing, it's a domino effect, especially if you have to favour it and therefore put extra strain elsewhere. let's both take a spa day and get some massages lmfao we deserve it
I'm glad your shoulder is better now! <3
I'm quaking bb DILF agenda? ? the DILF of DILFs>? I gotta know WHO
older guys are just... FINE AF! ahem, anyway, yes :) to a degree. I don't know the members as well though. And I don't listen to H.O.T very often. Well, except for Woohyuk's solo work (I love him T_T). I don't know Sechskies very well except for the occasion song here and there, tho I love... gosh, darn those scandals. I've adored Jaijin ever since I saw him in a certain show haha.
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thelargefrye · 1 year ago
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i have decided i will be live reacting to this based off just the first few lines. TOPAZ YOU ARE MAKING ME SUFFER!!
SEONGHWA STILL CALLING HER LOVER!! STOP I LOVE IT STILL SHOULD BE ME IM JUST SAYING
Seonghwa was right, of course. He was fingerfucking you in the back of your classroom, inside the small office connected to it. You were so goddamn wet that the noise of his fingers moving in and out of you was so loud that it was the reason you were whimpering in the first place. Why he made you feel the way you felt was beyond your capabilities of figuring out but it still frustrated you just as much. 
right in the back of her classroom, love it, be embarrassed. this is just so 🤌🤌🤌🤌 perfect-o. such a great start to a second part.
omg the "don't you dare" 🤭🤭 "needy much?" yes, very much.
oof love the little back and forth. like... i can clearly tell some time has passed since part one, but the two's relationship has really seemed to just develop and they grew closer. very like, not enemies, but an old married couple almost lol
i love yn's ambition. like despite fucking seonghwa, she still clearly has a job that she wants and needs to do. she wants to teach and i really admire that as a teacher myself lol
just let seonghwa be a thoughtful lover, yn, i promise you won't be disappointed
ooooo this backstory on the civil war!! i am invested. learning about what both yn and seonghwa did.
“I know you get off me submitting to you,” You whispered harshly. “Don’t pretend otherwise. You seduced me to reduce me to this. A white magic user on her knees for a dark magic user she despised.”
this. i loved this. and especially after seonghwa talks about how both white magic users and dark magic users should be treated equally. perfect.
LISTEN– i love seonghwa calling yn lover BUT IMAGINE IF HE CALLED HER DREAM!! you know..... because she deals with dreams with her magic........ okay i'll leave.
"Just…” You breathed in and then out. “I’m letting you be gentle with me. Please.”
YES PLEASE!!! also i just want to note that yn seems a little unsure about sucking seonghwa off and while seonghwa could be just mean or whatever. he's not. like she clearly wants to return the gesture of getting him off, but she's unsure and seonghwa can see that BECAUSE SHE FUCKING ASKS FOR HIM TO BE GENTLE FHDSKJFHSJKDF I LOVE IT
“I wonder, will you be a good little White Magic User and spit? Or will you be my good little dream witch and swallow?”
SIR??!!?? I WILL GIVE UP EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW FOR YOU WITH THAT TYPE OF LANGUAGE
okay that scene with students. just know that there are such thing as dumb questions ALSO the rabbit scaring yn was lowkey funny. loved it.
MINGI BABY YOU'RE TRYING SO HARD. ITS OKAY ILL LET YOU SHOT YOUR SHOT ANY DAY OF THE WEEK IF YOU WANT.
HONGJOONG FHSDKFJHSDKFJSHKFSDJFHKS
CAPTAIN HONGJOONG!!!! FHSDKJFHDSKJFHS oh gosh... i feel faint...
also hongjoong choosing the SAME table that seonghwa first sat at.... very interesting you men of power seem to do... very interesting. got my eye on you.
ooooo wooyoung please be jealous. i love it. also yn being a "heartbreaker" we stan break them hearts my dream queen, break them hearts. also, i'm sensing slight tension between some people....
LE GASP THE SCAR!! I KNEW IT!! CAN NEVER TRUST A MAN WHO WAS A CAPTAIN 😭😭 also seonghwa defending yn, baby yes thank you.
“Did she tell you she was mine before she was yours?” Seonghwa didn’t get jealous, however. “How stupid of you to lose her then.”
O M G I LOVED THESE LINES
i'm sensing tension between some people... i think they need to fuck, i'm JUST saying.
“I’m too busy dealing with stupid student antics. I hardly can find the time to summon S-class demons to take over the world,” Seonghwa retorted, rearranging the cutlery in front of him.
hongjoong, sir, you need to worry about the STUDENTS trying to summon an s-class demon, not the director.
wooyoung please, i love you and you're handsome but those dinners aren't it i'm afraid. gordon ramsey would be disappointed.
"exchanging war stories" ummm... yes maam you are now.
You rolled your eyes. “I don’t care about your scars, Seonghwa.”
oof, yn... that's seems a little mean. like damn, i get not wanting to share your past relationship, but no reason to be this rude. THIN ICE.
the sudden rage?!!?? o m g please WHAT?? MANY THOUGHTS JUST HAPPENED!!! also, glad yn was just surprised feels like thats just the right reaction to have to something so sudden. not afraid, just surprised.
that was just a good roller coaster to go on. from the smut to the interactions with mingi, to reuniting with hongjoong, finding out him and seonghwa fought against each other... that hongjoong gave seonghwa his scar. and then to wooyoung's emotions and feelings lingering in the background. yn knowing the cook's not happy yet... almost not totally caring about it, but still realizing that he's not happy.
then yn talking about her past with hongjoong... sort of. i'm sorry topaz BUT IM GONNA NEED A THEIR STORY IN A SEPARATE THING FHSKJFHKSDH. but the ending was just 🤌🤌 and i know by the next chapter that IM GONNA BE FEED!!
just want to say that i also need wooyoung to get his own story. like baby don't worry about that dream professor when you have me 🥴
The past will come back to haunt you
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ღPairing: Seonghwa x Reader (f) ღGenre: enemies to lovers, Modern Wizardry School au ღWord Count: 4,732 ღWarnings: mentions of war, battles, mental warfare, fingering, oral (male receiving), public sex, nipple play, breeding kink (he never gives up okay) m and f orgasm, dom hwa/sub reader, cum eating ღRated: 18+ MDNI, smut with hella plot now ღSummary: in an attempt to juggle your new teacher life, your new love life, a jealous cook, and an old flame, you find yourself in serious trouble, up to your neck really, and Mingi still wants to shoot his shot too. If only you could go back to only having to deal with dreams... ღDedication: @mejuii & @downtoamagicalland, @flurrys-creativity​ thank you for all beta-ing but also pushing me down this well farther. look what we've done ღPrevious Part| ღAll of the Parts | ღNext Part
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You whimpered and Seonghwa chuckled softly into the shell of your ear. “What’s wrong, lover?”
You swallowed loudly. “Nothing is wrong, Seonghwa.”
“Then why the small noises of discontent?” He placed soft kisses down the side of your neck, with the aid of you craning your neck, of course.
“I don’t want to be here!” You said in frustration.
“Don’t want to be here?” He echoed you in a crooning voice. “A little late for that now, don’t you think?”
Seonghwa was right, of course. He was fingerfucking you in the back of your classroom, inside the small office connected to it. You were so goddamn wet that the noise of his fingers moving in and out of you was so loud that it was the reason you were whimpering in the first place. Why he made you feel the way you felt was beyond your capabilities of figuring out but it still frustrated you just as much. 
“I could stop, I suppose,” Seonghwa mused out loud.
“Don't you dare,” You hissed immediately and then internally winced. Needy much?
Seonghwa continued as if you hadn't said a thing. “But then again, I am having too much fun.”
Your sweater was pulled up to your chin, your bra also pulled up so that your breasts were bare to the moonlight. Every now and then Seonghwa tweaked your nipple so that you would cry out for him more. Your leg was propped up by the chair that normally your visiting students sat in. Everything was so debauched right now, how could you not be dripping, soaking wet?
“If only your students could see you now,” He spoke as he added a third finger to stretch your inner walls. “I hear you’re quite firm with them; that you’ll only accept a hundred percent from them. The grades are showing too, despite the added graffiti to the public washrooms. They call you the Taskmistress. But I’m seeing none of that right now.”
“Seonghwa,” You said through gritted teeth.
He chuckled again, male-sounding and amused. “Yes, lover?”
“Do you have to talk so much? Can’t you simply--”
You didn’t get to finish your sentence because Seonghwa cupped your breast and was squeezing it gently and made you moan. “Come now, you and I both know that most of this is our back and forth. What fun would it be if I simply fucked you and I didn’t speak a word?”
“I--” You let out an unseemly cry as Seonghwa now worked his thumb into the mix, rubbing your clit in lazy circles as he continued to fuck you with three fingers that you now realized he had added. “Seonghwa,” You groaned from simply feeling so much pleasure from him.
“Are you sure you’re enjoying this?” Seonghwa teased, knowing full well how fucked out you were. “You were much louder and more vocal when we used my pain spell.”
Your hips began to roll with his thrusts, feeling your impending orgasm building. “Puh-please,” You whined.
“Please what, lover?” Seonghwa purred, a habit you were starting to resent because it usually meant he was about to get exactly what he wanted.
“Please, can I come?” You whined in frustration once again.
“What will you give me in return?” His thrusts into you slowed to bargain with you.
“Whatever you want!” You said, mind simply focused on your orgasm.
“Not sure you want to promise me that," Seonghwa warned you. “What if I said I wanted you to give me little, fat babies that could run around the campus?”
"Not this again!" You panted. "Seonghwa, we talked about this. Do you really want to have to replace another teacher?"
Seonghwa responded with no delay. "The students can have a free period. It'll be fine."
"No. I did not take this job with the intention of seducing the director and becoming his pregnant lover. I want to teach our students about dreams. I want it to be useful to them in ways that I never got to explore." And that was the utter truth.
"Fine." But he genuinely sounded disappointed by your flat refusal.
"So?" You whined again.
"Did you really doubt I'd start this without finishing it?" Seonghwa thrusted his fingers into you with a curl to his fingers that began to massage your g-spot.
"Hnnnnnnn!" You groaned, teeth firmly biting into your bottom lip. "I meant--! What else--fuck fuck fuck--do you want?"
As much as you knew Seonghwa enjoyed playing with your body like it was an instrument, he wasn't getting anything out of this clandestine meeting currently. 
"Hmmmm," Seonghwa contemplated the offer for real this time. "I should take advantage of your clouded brain to ask for something incredibly intimate."
"Seonghwa!" You whined.
"Take me in your mouth, lover. I only think that's fair, hmmm?" Seonghwa placed soft kisses on the back of your neck, sweaty or not. In between being completely lewd with you, he seemed to hint that he could be quite the thoughtful lover… if you let him, that was. And you were not inclined to allow that.
"Fine fine fine FINE! Just," You let out another whimper, rolling your hips desperately. "Wanna come!"
"My pleasure," He assured you.
He focused solely on fucking you with his fingers, hitting the soft spot inside of you again and again, until you had to bite down on your finger as you came. The scream that threatened to come from your mouth was too loud to be coming from your classroom so late at night. If someone came in to check on you, you would be beyond embarrassed. Not to mention, it would probably give Seonghwa just another reason to lift the veil and reveal to any one that was willing to listen, that he had you wrapped around his fingers--literally and figuratively.
You whined over and over as your climax lapped at your nerves, echoing and making you twitch still. Seonghwa always seemed to have this effect on you. Or at least what you had noticed during the past few times you had let this happen again.
You groaned as you let your leg down after Seonghwa pulled his fingers from within you. You turned around, kneeling on the floor, needing the rest but also preparing for what you were willing to give Seonghwa in return. It, unfortunately, gave you a perfect view of him sucking on each one of his fingers to clean your wetness from them. You watched as he seemed to take great relish in the notion, those dark eyes peering down on you as he did so.
"What did you mean by 'ways you never got to explore’?" Seonghwa adjusted his glasses on the bridge of his nose habitually, as if your previous conversation had just occurred to him.
You rolled your eyes. “It was on my resume, Director,” You said smartly. “I was in the Intelligence Corps during the War.”
Seonghwa cocked his head curiously. “How is it that we never met?”
It wasn’t the first time he had referenced the civil war before. “Well, I was not involved in any of the physical or metaphysical fighting. Because of my penchant for dreaming, I worked covertly. I dove into the other side’s dreams and pulled imperative information for my side to use.”
Seonghwa hummed in acknowledgement. “I heard about you.”
“And would I have heard about you?” You asked, interest piqued. 
Seonghwa grinned and it sent a shiver down your spine. “I was a part of the metaphysical fighting. They sent me in to make a bloody mess of the battlefield. After each successful battle, I went back to collect a Corpse Crow feather. It was my trophy, of sorts."
"The Reaper?" You said in awe. 
You couldn't help it. You had heard of the stories of the man that could summon demons like they were his beloved pets. When the legend spread about how he was secretly Death's reaper, the White Magic Army grew more resolute to subdue the Black Magic Rebellion. It was only more proof that any black magic user was simply there to ruin the world.
Seonghwa’s fingers curled under the corner of your jaw to tip your head back to him. "I only fought for our rights. We deserved to be treated as equals."
"I know you get off me submitting to you," You whispered harshly. "Don't pretend otherwise. You seduced me to reduce me to this. A white magic user on her knees for a dark magic user she despised."
Seonghwa smirked. "Don't hate me so much now, hmmm?"
"I don't." You broke your gaze with him. "You're very gentle when you want to be."
"When you'll let me," Seonghwa corrected you softly.
"You're being ridiculous," You shook your head out of his grip. "Are we doing this or not? I have papers to finish grading, that you so rudely interrupted me from doing."
Today it was leather pants that you reached for. His long body was framed with a rather obnoxious red jacket. Seonghwa was the fanciful dresser, but then again, it seemed he relished it as the director. He said nothing as you impatiently yanked his pants down to his thighs to reveal his cock.
"It's going to get messy," Seonghwa warned you. His hand was on the top of your head now, almost cupping the back.
"Don't you like messy?" You grumbled.
"It's an adorable look on you, certainly," Seonghwa said, smiling crookedly.
You scoffed at his remark. "Don't get cute with me. It will do you no good."
"Right," Seonghwa gave a nod, sharp and quick, "You prefer me to be intimidating and arrogant."
You rolled your eyes. "I'm starting now."
"I'm ready for you, lover," Seonghwa purred.
You struggled, genuinely, to get all of Seonghwa inside of your mouth. He was that long. You should have realized it, all those times he had fucked you and hit the end of you, but it didn’t quite have the same effect as taking him in your mouth. After taking him as far into your mouth as you could, you released him with a lewd pop. “Yeah about that blow job…”
Seonghwa cocked his head, “Chickening out already?”
You sent a glare up at him. “Seonghwa.”
He hummed back at you in affirmation. “I'm listening."
"Just…" You breathed in and then out. "I'm letting you be gentle with me. Please."
Seonghwa became serious, his eyes searching yours. "Don't."
You blinked up at him. "What?" 
Back came his charming smile. "Nothing. I'll treat you good." Next, Seonghwa rubbed the head of his cock against your lips. "Treat me good too."
You opened your mouth and let him push in. You found yourself flattening your tongue and Seonghwa pulled out. The tip of your tongue ran along the underside of his head before he pushed in again. You slowly began to bob your head along his length. 
You focused on the moment, about to close your eyes when Seonghwa’s hand tightened, making your scalp tingle. "Don't you dare close your eyes, lover."
You let out a big breath through your nose and flashed your eyes upwards. "Oh, if looks could kill," Seonghwa chuckled.
You dropped your jaw and changed the angle. You pushed Seonghwa’s sensitive head crudely against the side of your cheek. He swallowed, clenching his jaw in response. 
"I wonder, will you be a good little White Magic User and spit? Or will you be my good little dream witch and swallow?"
You leaned back, circling your tongue around the head of his cock. When he tossed his head back, revealing the sharpness of his jaw and the beauty of his neck, you brought your teeth gently down.
Seonghwa sucked in air as a hiss. His lips curled on one side. "Oh, does the little white magic user have teeth?"
You took him swiftly back into your mouth, barely battling down your gag reflex, but managing to get him down your throat. Seonghwa moaned. You hollowed your cheeks, bracing a hand at the base of his shaft, and taking him as deeply and as quickly as you could. Seonghwa’s moans turned into a crescendo of airy cries until he literally shot his seed down your throat.
"Fuck," Seonghwa swore, his plump lips releasing from his teeth. 
You released him and wiped your mouth with the back of your hand. "Guess that makes me--" 
You made a face and Seonghwa laughed, albeit tiredly. "Mine? No, I'm not sure that applies to you."
You stood up and pulled all your clothes back in place. "I suppose you should go then."
"Professor," Seonghwa winked at you and left in a cloud of his scent.
You fell more than sat into your chair, combing your hand through your hair. What the hell were you doing?
ღ ღ ღ
"I'm going to teach you how to crush up valerian root properly, so that you may induce yourself into a dreamlike state," You said, smiling brightly.
One of your students raised their hand. "Can't we just spell ourselves asleep?"
"You could. But if you spelled yourself asleep, how are you going to spell yourself out of it… if you're asleep?" You raised an eyebrow at them.
The student looked sheepish and you patted their shoulder. "So we go for a more natural remedy and that way we can estimate how long we'll be under and when we'll be able to wake up."
You pulled out a mortar and pedestal and carefully explained how much root for how many hours. The technique for grinding was tedious but any chunks would mess up the estimate of how many hours you'd be sleeping. 
A small white rabbit with terrifying pink eyes hopped onto your desk, scaring you. "You may inform your students that classes are done for the day."
You frowned at the talking animal until you realized it was a demon Seonghwa had summoned to deliver a message. "I want you to all be prepared to be grinding these roots tomorrow and if I see any chunks then you're going to be sleeping through the weekend, understood?" You announced crisply.
"Yes Mistress Dreams," Your class intoned and then it was like a zoo for them to get out.
The bunny remained, however. "Can I help you?" 
"You're dismissed as well." The bunny twitched its nose and then it was gone.
"Damn arrogant black magic users," You cursed under your breath. You exited your classroom promptly.
"Professor!" Mingi caught up with you quickly, as was his right with his long legs.
"Does he do this a lot?" You wondered.
"Dismiss class all of a sudden?" Mingi thought about it for a moment, "Yeah. But I don't think he does it for the students."
"Oh, certainly not--" You had to bite your tongue. Maybe you shouldn't make scathing comments about the director of the school to another professor. You changed the direction of your sentence, "Why does he do it?"
Mingi rubbed his fingers together, a nervous tick, you had gathered during your first few weeks here. Oddly enough, the soot on his fingers never smeared. "Dunno. He's very hush hush about it. Everything resumes the same the next day. Maybe a dry announcement that love spells are forbidden before All Hallows Eve and it's better if you simply don't get caught doing it."
You let out a noise of disbelief. "Of course. Because the higher evil is getting caught, not doing the love spell itself."
Mingi screwed up his face in concentration, "Not sure I've ever been caught in a love spell. Once, there was this animal whisperer who--"
"Mingi," You stopped his far-fetched story before it got out of hand. "It's a rare day off. I plan on finding a good book to read and enjoying the last of the fall sunshine."
Mingi smiled pleasantly. "That sounds nice. Perhaps--"
"Nope," You cut him off, "Don't even think about it. I do not want to get involved with the faculty." Which was true. You had made that mistake once and you didn't really want to think about what Seonghwa might do if he caught you with another professor.
Mingi shrugged his shoulders, unfazed. "I've got a bottle of Gin that was said to be made by the wee folk if you're ever interested."
You couldn't help but be a little charmed by his confidence never wavering. “Heard, Professor Elements.”
Mingi made a face, “Please, call me Mingi.”
You laughed, waving a hand and taking a separate path to town. You did have a lovely afternoon in the library. The town had a small one albeit stuffed with interesting books that you had never picked up in the big city. You found a café to snack and read until the owner quietly pushed you out, insisting you get some real food from Wooyoung’s pub.
It was an utter surprise for you to come face to face with your old captain. “Hongjoong?”
“Lieutenant,” Hongjoong smiled widely, “To what do I owe this honor of your presence?”
“I work at the school,” You maintained your frown, “The real question is what are you doing here?”
Hongjoong shrugged, “Here? I’m getting dinner.”
“Hongjoong,” You scolded him, “We aren’t in the war anymore, you don’t have to dance around with your words.”
Hongjoong giggled and you followed him into the dining room. “Old habits die hard.”
Hongjoong sat down, a wide stance but he also happened to choose the same table Seonghwa had when you first dined here. Old habits die hard indeed. Two men that were used to guarding their own backs. 
“Will you sit with me?” Hongjoong wondered, his eyes shining up at you.
“I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Joong.” You winced at the shortening of his name. You didn’t think that sort of intimacy was called for anymore.
“Please,” Hongjoong motioned for you to take the chair across from him, “You know I don’t beg for much.”
You took the seat, albeit reluctantly. “You don’t need to. What station do you have now within the army? Lieutenant Colonel?”
“General, actually,” Hongjoong corrected you, ducking his head slightly in humbleness.
“Congratulations,” You said cordially.
Wooyoung came up to your table but he wasn’t the flirty, happy man you had known only a few weeks ago. “Mistress Dreams,” Wooyoung said to you bluntly, “What would you like for you and your guest?” Except Wooyoung made ‘guest’ sound like it was a derogatory term.
“Whatever you feel like making this evening, Woo,” You said gently. Looks like he wasn’t too impressed with your stint with Seonghwa.
Hongjoong followed Wooyoung with dark eyes. “Always a heartbreaker, Lieutenant.”
You clucked your tongue at him. “That was a long time ago, Hongjoong.”
“Doesn’t feel like it.” Hongjoong looked directly in the eyes. 
“Well it was,” You insisted, “Better to leave it in the past.”
“Isn’t this a pleasant surprise,” A cool tone drawled from behind you.
You whipped around in your seat to find Seonghwa with a not-so-pleasant smile on his face. "Ah, Seonghwa, I'd like you to meet Hongjoong, my--"
The tension between the two men could cut like a knife.
"What am I missing here?" You wondered.
"My scar? The one you never asked about? He gave it to me."
You stared at Hongjoong. "You met the Reaper in battle?"
Hongjoong ignored your question. "How did you see his scar?"
You looked down at the table immediately. "That's none of your business."
"What a world we live in," Hongjoong laughed mirthlessly. "Where Black Magic users and White Magic users fu--"
"Sir, there is a lady present." Seonghwa smacked a hand down on the table rather loudly. "Do not insult her."
Hongjoong cocked his head, tongue caught between his teeth and you knew you were done for. Hongjoong was very petty and vindictive, in his own way. "Did she tell you she was mine before she was yours?"
Seonghwa didn't get jealous, however. "How stupid of you to lose her then."
Hongjoong’s eyes narrowed down at the director. "I didn't lose her."
"Hongjoong," You scolded him, "Seonghwa, enough of this. Like two horses, you two, stamping and snorting at each other."
Seonghwa bowed his head. "I'll let you finish your dinner."
You let out a great sigh, rubbing your temples. “Need I remind you that the war is over?” You turned to Hongjoong, “If I can work for him then you can endure a dinner with him.”
Hongjoong nodded curtly and Seonghwa took a seat. “Won’t this be fun,” Seonghwa muttered.
“You’ve settled in well?” Hongjoong queried inquisitively.
You nodded, sipping the fruity drink Wooyoung had made for you. “Everyone has been very welcoming.”
“I bet,” Hongjoong said, eyes sliding back towards Seonghwa.
Seonghwa grinned devilishly. “If I had it my way, she’d be plump with peace babies as we speak.”
You choke on your beverage, spraying the table and yourself. Good thing there wasn’t any food yet. Seonghwa offered you a handkerchief and you snatched it from his hands rather rudely. Damn men and their egos needing to be stroked.
Hongjoong’s eyes were glittering brightly with malice. “Some things never change, I suppose.”
“Alright,” You said in a hoarse voice from choking, “My sex life, past or present, is not a dinner subject. Got it?”
Seonghwa ran a hand through his hair. “Understood.”
“You never did tell me why you are here, Joong?” You changed the subject. Seonghwa narrowed his eyes at the familiar shortening of your captain’s name.
“Oh, Seonghwa is used to me skulking about. I’m his unofficial supervisor. Everyone in the school board is terrified of him, so they send me to make sure he’s not using the school as a sacrificial lamb for a S-class summoning so he can take over the world,” Hongjoong said with a delighted grin.
“I’m too busy dealing with stupid student antics. I hardly can find the time to summon S-class demons to take over the world,” Seonghwa retorted, rearranging the cutlery in front of him.
“Wooyoung, what’s taking you so long?” You shouted, rethinking your life choices.
“I now have three perfect dinners to prepare!” Wooyoung yelled back from the kitchen.
After a few more minutes of crashing and banging and shouting, Wooyoung brought out three dishes. Seonghwa’s salmon still had its head attached, Hongjoong had a vegetarian dish and yours was burnt chicken souvlaki. 
"Wooyoung!" You frowned hard, "What's this?"
Wooyoung almost sneered. "It's what you're getting."
Seonghwa laughed but it was arrogant and not nice. "He cooks with his emotions. These are his emotions."
Your eyes shot up to Wooyoung. He won't look you in the eye. You feel guilty even though you're not sure you should. "Oh," was all you could manage.
Hongjoong scoffed under his breath when Wooyoung shot back to the kitchen. "I love visiting this town."
You turned towards Seonghwa. "Should we go?"
"Quite," Seonghwa drawled. He stood up, pulling the lapels to straighten his velvet jacket. He offered his arm to you.
Hongjoong rubbed the bridge of his nose tiredly. "Maybe I should get some rest. It's been a long day."
"We'll see you at school tomorrow," Seonghwa nodded curtly.
You were about to take Seonghwa’s arm when Hongjoong wrapped his hand around your wrist. "Lieutenant?" 
"Hongjoong…" You really didn't know what to say to him.
He smiled, tightly, "I'm sorry. Old habits truly die hard."
You felt your heart softening. "I'll see you tomorrow, Joong."
“What’s tomorrow?” You wondered after you were walking down the softly lit road back towards the Academy.
“Hongjoong has an announcement to make to the students,” Seonghwa revealed yet revealing nothing.
“Oooookaaayyyy,” You drew out, knowing Seonghwa wasn’t going to say another thing. You fumbled around until you pulled his handkerchief out of your pocket. “I should give this back to you.”
Seonghwa hummed, taking it and putting it in his vest pocket. “Are you going to tell me about him?” He said after a moment of silence. 
You sighed heavily. You knew Seonghwa was going to ask about Hongjoong even though he had no right to do so. Seonghwa side-eyed you from beside you. “I’ll tell you about the scar he gave me if you do.”
“Is this what we’re doing now?” You laughed, “Exchanging war stories?”
Seonghwa remained silent. He certainly wasn’t going to beg for it. It would be an equal opportunity exchange. If you wanted to know about his scars then you had to tell him about you and Hongjoong. It was up to you. He always left it up to you.
You rolled your eyes. “I don’t care about your scars, Seonghwa.”
Seonghwa pursed his lips, his only hint to frustration. “Indulge me.”
“When I got conscripted from school to the army, the war was in full swing. I was assigned to the Intelligence Corp immediately. Hongjoong was my captain. I grew feelings for him, for his ambition to move up in the army and his determination to put this war to an end as soon as possible. There was a mission, they asked me to not just simply peek into someone’s dreams, they wanted me to eat it, and in doing so, make them forget the memory completely.”
“Isn’t that against your code? To destroy?” Seonghwa offered.
You nodded. “Still, they said we had to set our code aside, it was a war after all. So I did it. Not soon after, the negotiations started up and when the war ended, I resigned. Hongjoong wasn’t happy with me but I wanted to leave the war far behind me. I took my war spoils and set up my family nicely. I got my teacher license and now I’m here.”
“Do you love him still?” Seonghwa asked.
You shook my head, “I left that behind when I left the army.”
“My turn I suppose,” Seonghwa kicked a rock with his polished loafers.
We just so happened to be in front of the school’s gates. “I’m still hungry,” You said truthfully.
“I could tell you over dinner,” Seonghwa suggested.
“Seonghwa…”
“No one needs to know,” Seonghwa proposed. “It could be me just checking in with my newest professor to see how she is adjusting to her life.”
“Over dinner? While you tell me a personal story? Seonghwa!”
Seonghwa combed a hand through his hair. “You have made it very clear that no one can ever know about this. I am doing my best. But you are wearing my patience, little white magic user.”
“Excuse you?” You demanded.
Seonghwa did not deem it important enough to explain himself further. “Will you or won’t you come to my rooms for dinner so that I may pay you back and tell you the story of my scars?”
“Well, you certainly make it hard to decline with a tasty offer like that,” You said with sarcasm coating your tongue.
You found yourself up against the brick pillars that held the black iron gates to the school. Seonghwa’s face was pulled into a snarl, with his hand precariously around your neck. You weren’t scared of Seonghwa, simply surprised at the moment. He had gone from slightly frustrated to a full on animal rage. Had he been hiding that the entire night?
“Hello, Reaper,” You cooed.
You watched as Seonghwa carefully packed away his dangerous side until his eyes simply burned brightly. He looked slightly bashful at his outburst. “It seems like you have a talent for bringing this out of me.”
“You better be a good cook because it’s going to take a hell of a dinner to apologize, Director Park.”
Seonghwa winced at the use of his formal title. He let go of you and allowed you to straighten your clothes. “Please, I prefer when you call me Seonghwa.”
You sent him a cool look, “Perhaps you’ll earn that title later. For now, you will remain as my boss. I don’t feel like you deserve to be called by that name right now.”
You walked into the school grounds, waving your hand and the gates recognized you as a teacher. They swung open and you sent a look over your shoulder. “Are you coming or am I going to have to cook for myself?”
Seonghwa looked towards the sky, whether for guidance or to send a prayer, you weren’t sure. “Coming, Lover.”
“Seonghwa!” You hissed.
He smiled, looking back like his charming self. “Thought you said you weren’t going to--oof!” You smacked his chest.
“Don’t push your luck.”
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Taglist: @hijirikaww @rdiamond2727 @flowerboykun @toxicccred @starillusion13 @flurrys-creativity @stardragongalaxy @a-soft-hornytiny
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jayflrt · 3 years ago
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yes yes i finished my midterms :D i finished quite early compared to others because some of my friends are still having tests this week but i was lucky and finished them last week. BUT I STILL HAVENT HAD TIME TO READ DECEIT AND NOW I SEE SPIDER-JAKE IS OUT TOO i promise to read them soon
i agree that cb shows are more fun than award shows or year-end shows ajsjdjfjf i mean their only pro is the special performances idols put but cb shows are just generally are more fun. 127's shows per cb are the best imo they put a whole show its so entertaining. i think my favourite has to be the late punch punch show during punch era (are those considered cb shows idk but those ones are funny)
PLEASE the way you slandered sunghoon's round heart </3 but same my non-engene era was so interesting. but also not??? i didnt have anyone to "lead" me thru the dashers unlike with nct or tbz but i def did a lot of jumping around choosing a bias </3 i think my first enha exposure was the time they played foot volleyball in en o'clock and i noticed jungwon the most and i was like "omg stan????" and then when watching iland i was a super jay stan. when he shot up ranks i genuinely cried for him 😭 like i alr knew who got in the final lineup but i was still so emotionally invested
im looking for an A-line gown! i want to be a little dramatic since over half of my time in hs was during the pandemic 😭 i tried some dresses and i found a rly nice red one and another pink+black one but im still looking! i hope to find one soon 🙏
i hope your week has been slaying like always 😁
- 🌻
oh my gosh congrats on finishing midterms !!!! <33 i hope you get to relax a lot now 🥰💖 and that’s so nice to have finished them a week earlier omg 🤧 kinda same for me but the opposite ?? my friends all had their midterms last week but the rest of mine are coming up this week HAHAH :’) ALSO PLS NO RUSH TAKE YOUR TIME !! 💕
omg award shows used to be so fun with idols interacting and just having fun together 😔 it’s so upsetting how the surge in popularity with kpop has come with them needing to keep to themselves in fear of ruining their image/starting a dating scandal <//3 i suppose covid has to do with it as well but i miss all the group interactions 🤧 also i agree !! tbh nct just has such good comeback shows HAHAH they’re so entertaining and with content like 7llin in our youth and stuff 💓 I LOVED LATE PUNCH PUNCH SHOW LMFOAJDJF (and yes i do think those are considered comeback show content !!!)
i’m sorry sunghoon i appreciate your round heart now 😔 #roundheartsupremacy 💗 omg yeahh that was me for nct !! i sort of just stanned them on my own :’) WAIT SAME I CRIED FOR JAY 😭😭 i watched iland first and my attention had always been on jay and sunghoon, but i also considered biasing sunoo and jungwon too 🤧 sunoo caught my eye first actually!!
omg yes go all out !! 🥰🥰 i hope you have the time of your life omg like i didn’t think prom itself was all that ?? but the after parties were the night to remember 💘 omg have you found a dress by the time i post this ask :oo red sounds super pretty !! and are you gonna get your hair and makeup done too?
and thank you !! it’s been so weird bc this week has felt short but kinda long ?? i cant believe time is moving by so fast 😵‍💫 but i hope you’ve been doing well too and taking care !! ♡
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fr3aklike-me · 3 years ago
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*gonna respond to both of the recent asks in one to fix my mistake oops*
honestly it was a whole lot of just sitting and getting frustrated because southwest kept moving the time and i was just so exhausted so like i was supposed to land by 10:15 but didn’t end up landing until 10:45 and didn’t get home till almost midnight but its ok! thankfully i was able to sleep in!
you’re actually such a sweetheart?? love how me giving you compliments makes you happy which is making me even happier you’re so :’) honestly made me smile so big wow, thank you!! <33
you should feel as confident as possible! you’re such a cool person and i’m actually obsessed with your energy so hope you know that hehe <3
oh my gosh!! you’re so cute properly citing titles…that just made you like 10000x more endearing if that was even possible pls :’)
i think what i enjoy most about theatre is sharing stores and making people feel something. im on the crew for my schools production of cabaret and hearing audiences reactions personally make such long days 6:45-11pm so much more enjoyable because without even realizing they’re hyping everyone that’s involved up. also so often in society we’re taught to bottle up our emotions and i believe all art forms but especially theatre can really encourage sometime to become in touch with themselves and i just think its really special so its why i’ve become so invested.
i really love himym! it’s definitely rom com energy but i really love the dynamics because its similar to new girl and im also a hopeless romantic so i can’t help but get invested super easily lol i started watching it over thanksgiving break and finished all 9 seasons in two weeks so i was definitely attached (but its really good and helps to be a distraction because it’s not something like heavy that you have to really pay attention to which i love)
omg wallows!! yes!! they just released their second album tell me that its over and if you end up listening to it i would absolutely LOVE to hear your thoughts :’)
i also have come to the realization i have a tendency to break things up into paragraphs so i apologize for making this so long but i’m really loving this conversation & hope you are as well <33
-💌
omg, I definitely understand, it must've been so frustrating to have it continuously lengthened, to the point where you got home at midnight of all things. like, that must've been so draining and tiring. I hope you got some really good rest tho!
omg?? omg?? thank you so much, I'm literally smiling rn from how extremely sweet you are. it really makes me so happy omg, knowing I give off such an impression and make you feel that way is such high praise, and I cherish every single word so, so much. thank you so much. you are so sweet omg and it's so touching how open you are of your thoughts, thank you so much. really means the world to me. and omg the fact that it made you smile is so sweet asdfghjkl I'm so glad it did
thank you so much! you also carry such a good energy too, you're so sweet and honest about your feelings, which I appreciate enormously. and LMAO for the citing titles, I am in way too many humanities classes to the point where it feels weird not to cite dkjdkfj 😭
oooh, can you tell me about Cabaret? what is it about? and you're absolutely right, theatre absolutely does an amazing job at executing stories and truly bringing them to life and stirring a feeling within people. I actually do really want to see more plays - there are several local theatres near my university, and I think it'd be amazing to support them and be able to see more of such a beautiful art form. and omg, yes, I can imagine how beautiful it feels to see the audience's reactions and see how they're so moved - it must make it feel so worth it then because you know how much it's impacting the people watching, all due to the team's hard work. oh, yeah, you're absolutely right - all different art forms carry the capacity to express so many emotions and questions and thoughts that exist internally. there's even this quote by Victor Huge that's: "Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which it is impossible to be silent." and I feel like it's like that in so many art forms - there are ways it can express emotions that can seem so difficult to describe. it really is so special, I'm so glad for you that you get to engage with something so fulfilling. and omg, now I'm inspired to write too fkjkfgj
oooh, okay, I love that romcom energy, I'm also such a hopeless romantic - it's so easy to get me in my feels with romance. what's New Girl about? omg, see, I'm so bad with keeping up with shows, but I miss binging a show because it was that good. and I have so many I want to start. and I feel you, it's like a comfort show that is light enough it won't, like, haunt people for days, haha
omg I absolutely will let you know if I listen to it!! <3
please don't apologize! I also like breaking things into paragraph, because then it's way easier to respond to different things we're speaking on, since it's all neatly divided, hehe. and me too omg I'm enjoying this conversation so much! and thank you, I am, just pushing through the first day of Ramadan fjfgjk how is your day going?
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foxgloveinspace · 11 months ago
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You asked for my notes, but I bet you didn’t think they’d be so long itd be under a readmore! (Or… it me and maybe you did expect that LMAO).
Foxglove’s VAXIS II notes:
1.both times I’ve listened to the opening song now I got shudders up and down my spine and legs. Very nice.
2.no notes, just vibes, really liked this one.
3.(I forgot to take notes from song three and song four oops. I was enjoying the listening too much to take notes)
-I thought with all the info I could find that i would be very lost when listening, cause even the wiki said it was vague, but I’m surprised to find that the music (especially since I can read the lyrics) is painting a very vivid picture of a small family on the run. But since this is a prequel, and I don’t know the rest for sure, I have a bad feeling that something will happen to the parents perhaps.
5.very story heavy (they all are but this one more so), is this like, awakening to powers? I’m assuming this kid has powers tbh. Gonna go with that.
-Cass, have you ever listened to STARSET?? I think you’d like them.
6.there’s a lot of tension between these two huh. Does one of them not believe that their son is a kid of prophecy perhaps? And this is their aftermath of his powers awakening maybe?
7.still just like, what I see happening I guess I’m not sure if I’m getting any of this right; so this is also the aftermath of song 5? The kids powers like, awoke, and then this is one of the parents pov after? The one who like, ‘knew’ the whole time that he was special. So they were better prepared for it. But I’m not sure whose pov it is oof.
-hmmmm. This is why I like listening to things in order LMAO. I’m greatly enjoying this despite not really knowing much. But maybe it’s better this way, cause I’ll get super invested in the story now😌.
8.hmmm, so they had a disagreement about the above? And now are trying to make it work by avoiding their disagreement?? Or perhaps keep lying about their kid and saying he’s not special?? Anyway I like this song a lot actually, outside of context too.
9.(oh this one started really cool!) ok I really like this song too, I guess this is supposed to be him trying to reassure her that he still loves her and will be what she needs him to be no matter what, or is it a reminder of who he is?? Either way, really like this song.
10.this song hurt me. It hurts.
11.they where trying to get somewhere but they where too late? Trying to get back to their home before something happened, and it happened before they could get there. Trying to fight destiny and losing?
12.I’m crying. This has hurt the Foxglove beyond repair.
13.bard vibes. (Oh his Name is Vaxis ok, that makes since). I’m not gonna go back and change my notes, but I’m guessing before it wasn’t awaking his powers but like… he was truly coherent for the first time or something?? Gosh, i might like, truly start crying. It’s so hard to make me actually shed tears. Also they didn’t argue about him being a kid with powers, I wonder if they where arguing about like. If it would be worth it to take him to the place they had to?? Freaking heck. This song is making me emotional.
-so im guessing his parents had to get him somewhere, but had to sacrifice themselves to get him where he needed to go. And now im crying.😭😭😭. A really good album, but it kinda felt like being taken to the last movie in a series with my older sister and getting wrecked emotionally, and she’s sitting over there like ‘I told you to read the books or watch the others before we came.’ But she’s also crying.
Anyway. Thanks for introducing me to this band, I’ll have to give everything else a listen now too when I’m not emotionally destroyed
Dying to know if you’ve listened to Vaxis II yet!
I’d love to know your thoughts if you have 🫶🏼
I hope you’ve had a splendid weekend!
I haven’t had the time sadly😭 I’ve been In Recovery™️ today from the overstimulating weekend I had (fun times, a lot of Car Time which I love, but I am exhausted now🫠). I’m planning on listening tomorrow I think, I’ll be home alone, and I can use the big tv with the good speaker that when I turn it up loud can be heard from the drive way!!
Edit, oops: I hope your weekend was really good too! 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤
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seungstarss · 2 years ago
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Hehe... heheh mai 🥰🥰🥰😘😘 heheheheheheheheheheehehehehehehehehheheehheeheh I HATE YOU⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ NOW YOU GOT A LOTTTT OF EXPLAINING TO DO BECAUSE BESTIE 🥰🥰🥰🥰 THIS IS NOT FUNNY ��🤩🤩🤩🤩😇
first of all.... you hit me with the beginning and all that emotional weight. Listen now sis when I tell u IT FELT SO INTIMATE (in a good way ofc) LIKE GIRL I FELT ALL THE EMOTION AND IT BROKE ME. WHEN YN BROKE DOWN AND THE WAY ALL HER EMOTIONS CAME FLOODING THROUGH⁉️⁉️⁉️ YOUR WRITING IS PHENOMENAL. AN ABSOLUTE MASTERPIECE AND YOUR STYLE IS JUST SO INTRICATE. THE DETAIL JUST CAPTURES PEOPLE AND YOU HAVE SUCH A TALENT FOR GETTING PEOPLE EMOTIONALLY INVESTED. YOUVE DONE IT WITH OPEN SESAME AND THIS IS MAKING ME FEEL THE SAME WAY (EXCEPT IM FUCKING BAWLING RN 🤩🥰)
ANYWAYS BACK TO THE CHAPTER. I LITERALLY FELT SM LOVE FOR TRIAGE HEE WHEN HE CAME AND COMFORTED YN AND EMBRACED HER.... LIKE STOP IM GONNA CRY HES THE MOST PRECIOUS AND SWEET BOY EVER.... I JUST WANNA GIVE HIM A HUG. ALSO HIM "PATTING HER HEAD" WHILE COMFORTING HER??? IDK WHY LIKE ITS SO SIMPLE BUT THE WAY YOU WROTE IT MADE ME SO DAMN SOFT⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ LIKE BESTIE I WILL LITERALLY GO INSANE! SELL MY KIDNEYS FOR TRIAGE HEE❗️❗️❗️💥
now moving on...... the whole inner struggle that yn is having with herself just HITS so damn hard. The way she thinks she isn't good for him because he is just THAT pure and THAT good of a person. It's like a "too good to be true" and "how can someone like this even exist in a damned world like this." It's SO RAW AND SO TRUE TO REALITY AND I CAN SPEAK ABT THIS FROM A PERSONAL EXPIRENCE. ofc they're not like my significant other or wtv but they're a friend of mine and I always questioned how someone like him could even EXISIT??? Like I found it so hard to wrap my head around the fact that he was just THAT pure and THAT good of a person. And it feels like you're tainting them bc you can never be as pure/"clean"(?) As them. The fact that yn is going through this struggle within herself is SO REALISTIC AND IT HITS BC I CAN TOTALLY 100000% UNDERSTAND WHERE SHES COMING FROM. and what's different is that yn is definitely developing feelings which JUST MAKES HER STUGGLE WITHIN HERSELF EVEN MORE COMPLEX. like wow.... I'm just so speechless on how you portrayed it. It's so beautiful???? Like IK HER STRUGGLES AINT BEAUTIFUL BUT THE WAY U FLESHED OUT HER FEELINGS.... GOSH MAI IM IN LOVE WITH UR WRITING. 🥺😭
Okay now let's move on to that final scene shall we 🤩🥰🥰🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪 okay saur.... the fact that yn and hee both want out and both OBVIOUSLY ARE MADE FOR EACH OTHER... DONT DONT COMMUNICATE A SINGLE SHREAD OF THAT EMOTION BC BOTH ARE EQUALLY AS SCARED.... this breaks me like..... when heeseung realizes that no one makes him as happy as yn.... 😭😭😭😭 mai I will FUXKING CRY..... like also yn just getting so jealous... pls pls just pls just get married already lol 😭😭😭
But then of course,,, you had to hit us WITH THAT 🥰🔪 LIKE HAHAH...HAHAHA MAI... AHAHAHAH 💖💖💖💖💖🥰 first of all when heeseung went to the second floor I KNEW smth was gonna happen I was like PLEASE NO PLEASE NO.... LIKE UMMM FUCK TRIAGE! RYU AND TAE??⁉️⁉️⁉️ LIKE THEY CAN ALL TAKE A HIKE OFF A CLIFF⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ I ABSOLUTELY DISPISE BOTH OF THEM AND ITS MAKING ME THINK MURDER IS OKAY/j🥰🥰🥰 but oh my FUCKING Gosh.... when yn found him in the room just curled up in the corner ..... when j tell u my heart just FUXKING dropped. When he told her to leave him alone............. mai........ dude my heart cracked fr. Like the way I could picture this scene so vividly. Like the way his eyes were just bloodshot red BYE BYEEEEEEE I LITERALLY ALMOST CRIED AT THE END WHEN HE SAID "you can have your puzzle back, I don't want it anymore." My heart just broke..... and it WONF FUCKING HEAL UNTIL I FIND OUT WHAT BAPPENED AND WHAT THE FUCK THEY SAID TO HIM. I'm so fucking sad rn like you DONT UNDERSTAND. I LITERALLY DROPPED MY PHONE IN SHOCK AND IN PAIN. IM NOT LYING I FOR REAL JUST DROPPED MY PHONE ON THE GROUND....... LIKE WHAT THE FUCK. I DONT TJINK IVE EVER BEEN THIS EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN A STORY AND GOSH THIS IS BREAKING ME SM..... LIKE I CAN GO ON FOR DAYS ABT IT BUT JUST KNOW IM COMING FOR YOUR NECK 🥰🥰🥰 SO GIVE THEM A HAPPY ENDING PLS BC I HATE ANGST SO FUCKING MUCH AND I WILL. I WILL GO INSANE IF THEY DONT GET TGT. THEY ARE MADE FOR EACH OTHER OKAY. 😭😭😭😭🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪
Holy shit??? This is so long what the fuck and its not even my final review on this series? Just KNOW that this chapter LITERALLY CUT ME IN THE FUCKING CHEST OKAY. I WILL NEVER. NEVER BE OKAY UNTIL THEy GET THEIR HAPPY ENDING. HEESEUNGS LAST LINE WILL LINGER IN MY HEAD AND I WILL FR GO INSANE..... BITCH.... IM CRYING FR. I HATE U SM.... LIKE I CANT EVEN EXPLAIN BUT THIS LITERALLY MOVED ME AND IM SO FUCKING SAD NOW.......
Anyways I'm sorry this is so long. U don't even have to read it but just know I loved it so fucking much and now imma go cry myself to sleep 🥰🥰🔪
triage — ft. lee heeseung (chapter IV)
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you try to teach the nerd how to date.
synopsis: heeseung is not, by any measure, date-able. he’s dorky, he’s nerdy, and he does this weird thing where he snorts loudly every time he laughs. in fact, he loves everything that normal people are allergic to — computer science, collecting rare comic books, and birdwatching on the weekend.
given that you two have obviously nothing in common, you find yourself utterly flabbergasted when you receive a letter in your locker, on which heeseung has written, "hi. will you please teach me how to date?"
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MASTERLIST HERE !
kayla’s playlist (@/miiiwaa) ♡ my shitty og playlist . tags : #.*triage .
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TAGLIST
@enhyflirt @dreamyenskz @icedcoffeesunwoo @ssolari @skazoo @jjunis @heejake-en @koroktsuya @jeongwins @tinykoi-s @en-boyz @soobin-chois @blessed-sky @jhyunieee @kisswon @vbxrin @cosmicsunghoon @bloomedberry @jungwonielove @miiiwaa @jungwoniee @lhsng @missharubear @deonuism @sarahxy537 @bambisgirl @hrrhmay-primaryblog @yeonzzun @msxflower @sunsunu @jangwonie @sweetjaemss @seungstarss @tokyoflies @solelyenha @softforqiankun @goodforgyu @va1ry @taekbokki @ashxxkook @moon-gyus @jakeified @markleeisdabestdrug @wccycc @viagumi @pisss111 @outrologist @fairfairee @hiqhkey @ctrlemis
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chapter four
word count: 6.5k | navigation: previous / next / MASTERLIST warnings: swearing, (verbal) bullying
‎‎‏‏‎ ‎
“can i consider this my first real date?”
you feel your stomach twist and your heart begin to race, because while you must have convinced yourself that you were far beyond the stage of craving romance — you’re not.
you want it. you want romance. you want this romance, you want the one with the smiles and the giggles and the clumsy ballroom dancing and ice creams at a park and foam moustaches from nice cafés around town. you desperately want this kind of romance, but you want it with heeseung.
because you’ve realised that while you’re a sunset, heeseung is a sunrise. 
the kind of sunrise that rises during dawn; one that touches everything around it with a golden glow and brightens any room to the standards of heaven.
he makes everything around him glow. 
even you.
he makes even you feel like you can glow.
“you… you want to consider me your first real date?” you mutter, disbelieving of his words.
“well, yeah.” he blushes, eyes cast to the side as he rubs the nape of his neck. “so... so i can brag about you...” 
brag?
the rest of his sentence trickles off, but this is the point where your stomach mangles into a knot.
the thing about glow is that there must be darkness to begin — and if there’s anything your friendship with heeseung has shown you, it’s that you have so much darkness you’ve never been courageous enough to face. 
after all, heeseung is far removed from the life you’re accustomed to. 
brag?
there is nothing about you worth bragging about. 
you’ve spent years indulging in the exhilaration of danger and chaos, mistaking it for fulfilment and happiness. in your darkest days, you found shreds of pleasure in late night parties, cigarettes and blunts, and shallow friendships you always secretly knew deepened the void in your soul.
but heeseung is good. he is pure-hearted, and honest, and sweet, and so, so kind.
so as you sit here in heeseung’s car, faced with the realisation that you are dark and he is light, you can’t help but disintegrate into tears. 
you begin sobbing.
your darkness unravels from its knot — every fissure, every fracture, and every tiny splinter that traces your soul is exposed bare. you reveal your innermost insecurities to heeseung, crying because you feel undeserving of all the kindness he’s shown you.
tonight’s wedding date was one of the best nights of your life. it felt ethereal, like a movie brought to life or your favourite song played live and just for you. it was fun. too fun; the kind that makes it painfully obvious that you must eventually float back to earth and be dragged to reality. you cry and cry, guilt and misery seizing your throat. you don’t deserve him, because while he admires you like a goddess, you are nothing but damaged goods with skeletons and dust in her closet. 
the silence that hangs in the air is paralysing.
this must be a long time coming, because more sobs erupt from you than you thought possible — how long have you been holding in your misery?
or, perhaps you should have seen this coming — after all, there was always a voice that echoed in your subconscious each time you witnessed your shitty friends do shitty things. or when you’d wake up on a sunday morning and stare at the ceiling and contemplate the way you’ve wasted another night mindlessly partying. or when ryujin or taehyun exchanged malicious words about your classmates and you never said a thing until heeseung came along.
he must be terribly stunned by your reaction, but you are so inconsolably wretched that you don’t notice he’s exited the driver’s seat. in fact, heeseung has already dashed around to the other side of the car. he opens the door on your side, instantly wrapping you into an embrace that tucks your face into the crook of his neck.
warm. heeseung is warm. 
“i-i’m so sorry!” he squeaks. you inhale the scent of his soft cologne, while his warmth oozes into you and softens your heart. he doesn’t understand the reason behind your tears, and instead frantically pats your hair in an attempt to comfort you. “a-are you okay? ah, right— no, you’re obviously not okay... i’m… i’m so sorry. was it me? did i make you cry? whatever it is, i’m so, so sorry, okay?” 
you sob harder.
why is he apologising?
and why is he so goddamn warm?
with your proximity, you can feel the pounding inside heeseung’s chest. his heart is hammering. he must be nervous, you think, because you’ve always held yourself with a high chin and a strong resolve.
is he disappointed that you are not as confident and self-assured as you seem?
or has he seen through you all this time?
truthfully, what makes you more miserable is that his warmth and touch are ridiculously comforting. you melt into his arms, wrapping yours around his back to pull him in closer. he’s like a sun that doesn’t burn.
“d-do…” his whisper as unsung as a feather in rain, “…do you want ice cream? or… or cookies? or… um… books? i-i really don’t kno—”
his kind offers only make you sob harder. he truly is the personification of a sunrise, isn’t he? he’s bright, he’s warm, and with his presence, you find a sort of clarity you’ve been seeking all your life. 
“i-i—”
“it’s okay, it’s okay,” he shushes you, noticing the way you choke on your words. he rubs circles on your back, then strokes your hair, then pulls you in close and squeezes his cheek against the side of your head, enchanting you with his comfort and intimacy. seconds and minutes pass as you hug him as tightly as you can, indulging in another one of your selfish desires. 
one more time, you think. 
you could afford to be selfish just one more time. 
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you and heeseung never spoke about that night again.
the next time you saw him, you knew by the look in his eyes that he wanted to ask if you were okay. however, hesitant to admit your innermost insecurity about not being good enough for him, you gave him a simple smile and he never pushed any further.
from then, you let yourself enjoy simple pleasures with heeseung, and together, you embraced the aspects of your life you loathed most. you improved. you started studying again after he began tutoring you. you focused in class, read books, slept early, and rid yourself of all the bad influences in your life. you flourished and bloomed and slowly, with each tiny achievement you amassed across a few weeks, became more and more confident that you weren’t so bad after all.
it’s funny, because you’d once promised to teach heeseung how to date, without knowing that he’d teach you how to heal. now, you realise that these two come hand in hand. perhaps the reason you never let yourself settle down with a boy was because you’d never learned to heal first.
and because of this, you fall a little harder and harder for him each day.
you’re not sure it’s even love — but whatever it is, it exists and you feel it vibrate along your bones. and that’s enough for you to know it’s there, even if most of your affections are hidden in shadows. 
you might not deserve him, but you allow yourself to admire him in secrecy. you collect little memories and store them inside precious jars inside your heart. you watch him during the day and think about him during the night. you watch the way he scrunches up his shoulders when he laughs and the way his eyes sparkle when he talks about his mom. like a broken record, you replay every kind deed he does for you and roll around in your bed, giddy and blushing at the memory of every time your hands accidentally touched. you become absorbed in an innocent, pure love you hadn't thought could be possible for you. 
however, you know better than to keep him to yourself. after all, with each step to becoming a better person, you understand he is leaps and bounds out of your league. so, despite the way it makes your heart ache, you continue to teach heeseung.
in the same way he teaches you how to heal, you continue to teach him how to date. you accompany him on fake dates and show him how to approach random strangers with confidence. you teach him how to dress, how to hold a conversation, what to do at the end of the date, how to make a girl swoon, and finally, how to recognise when they’re in love with him. 
despite the fact that it makes your heart uneasy, you teach him the final lesson. 
HOW TO DATE: LESSON 3 — only ever date people that are in your league. otherwise, you’re just setting yourself up for failure. 
unbeknownst to you, this lesson is the very reason why heeseung’s heart is uneasy, too.
because he’s wondering the exact same thing.
is he good enough for you?
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“i really think you should go, heeseung.” 
“really?”
“really.”
it’s 5pm on a friday night, and the two of you are inside his bedroom — you, sitting on the edge of his bed with one leg folded over the other, and him nervously pacing around the room. he’s been like this ever since you both had returned from school.
your eyes follow each of his movements, even if that means he goes up and down the room — up and down and up and down and up and do—
“i-i… i don’t know.” he mumbles, gnawing on the nail of his thumb. you watch in amusement as he suddenly halts and huffs his cheeks. “i just… well, i’ve never really been to a party before.”
your eyes almost bulge out their sockets. “wait, really? never?”
he offers you a bashful look, straightening his school uniform. “n-never. is that bad?”
not bad, just surprising, though the more you think about it, not very surprising at all. it’s lee heeseung after all, the boy with his nose stuck so far into books that the tip of it probably has ink stains. “of course not!” you wave your hands, hoping to quell his anxiety. 
heeseung shoots you an uneasy look, so you stand and gently clasp his wrist, dragging him to sit with you on the bed. the two of you land on it with a soft thud and you hold one of his shoulders in reassurance.
“seriously, you should go.” you say with a soft smile. “it’ll be really fun!”
“you think?” he winces.
“yeah!” you nod enthusiastically. “i can help you pick out an outfit and everything. you’ll be the hottest guy there. girls…” you try to bite back the uncomfortable tug at your heart, “... will be all over you. you’ll have, like, four dates to attend the next day.”
“four dates?” he stares at you, puzzled. “that doesn’t seem very time-efficient—”
“it’s a hyperbole, heeseung. shut up.” you cut him off with a roll of the eyes. he giggles from your reaction, softening your expression. “in all seriousness, you should go. you know, my first party was crazy fun, like basically i ended up drinking a little too much and i woke up the next day with this video of me running down the road half-nak—”
he blinks.
“—uh, nauseated. half-nauseated. i was very sick, so i walked all the way home, totally sober and safe and normal! yes. i did just that.”
you turn away and cough awkwardly, forgetting about how unhinged most of your party stories seem to end. regardless, it really is your sincerest hope that heeseung goes — it’ll be good for him to go out and socialise with people that aren’t you; he’s obviously getting better and better at making friends with his classmates if he’s already received his first party invitation. 
“i-i don’t know… i’m not really going to know anybody there…”
“i’ll pick you up afterwards!” you grin, making the edges of his lips tug upward. then, you reach over and stroke his head, lowering yours to coo at him sarcastically. “and make sure you’re safe and all tucked into bed ‘cause you’re being such a baby.”
“b-baby?” his eyes widen while he bites back a smile, blush trickling into his cheeks. his actions make your eyes quickly dart to his lips before you tell yourself to stop thinking about kissing him. “hm…” he taps his chin with a restrained smile, before his eyes brighten and his head snaps up at you. “why don’t you come with me?”
you stare at him like he’s speaking a foreign language. “what? no!”
“why not?” he whines, nudging you with his shoulder. “you said it yourself! parties are fun!”
“well yeah, but, i’m kinda doing this thing where i stop drinking, heeseung!” you laugh, in reference to your recent life deep-cleanse. you’ve cut out your friends and self-sabotaging, which most definitely includes your drinking and partying.
“you don’t have to drink!” heeseung beams. “it’ll be fun. i-i think i’d be a lot more comfortable if you were there…”
shit. 
you feel yourself waver. truthfully speaking, you do miss partying, and you’re certain it’d be a hundred times better with heeseung by your side. perhaps it’d be good for you to keep a look out for heeseung; you know how most of these events tend to go. if they’re anything like the ones your friends used to host, one or two poor suckers almost always walk home with an embarrassing story that gets echoed into the hallways. there was no chance in hell you’d let that happen to your sweet boy.
“but i wasn’t invited.” you frown. ironically, your popularity has taken quite the hit — apparently, having your ex-best friend ryujin spread nasty rumors isn’t painting the nicest picture of you with the rest of the student body. you don’t really care for it, but you would certainly find it weird to show up to a party nobody expects you to attend.
“who cares? if they kick us out, we can hang out afterwards.” heeseung beams, his eyes crinkling with his smile. “late night bike rides?”
you can’t help but grin back, feeling the heavy feeling in your chest lift. late night bike rides — just him, you, and the chilly breeze as his bicycle courses its away down the pave way.
“okay… fine.”
truthfully, a part of you hopes this party doesn’t even happen.
unbeknownst to you, a part of heeseung is hoping the exact same thing.
.
.
.
apparently, picking out an outfit for heeseung is not easy when you disagree on his chosen tee.
“but people love superheroes.” heeseung pouts. “that’s why they’re called super. because they’re super cool.”
“dude, if you say another word, i will literally shove this shirt down your throat.” you growl, yanking the superhero tee out his hands and tossing it across the room. his head follows the direction it flies and he watches it land with a soft thud. “that shirt is an abomination and deserves to be burned.”
“aw,” he slumps. “but… that was iron man.”
“more like, iron letting anybody wear that outside.” you snort from your pun before your smile quickly vanishes. fuck. did you just laugh at your own joke? is heeseung making you… lame? is this who you are now? “okay… anyway.” you shudder at that thought. “i picked this outfit for you. come look!”
heeseung stamps his lips together, waddling closer toward you as he peers into his own closet. you quickly retrieve the white dress-shirt you’ve chosen and the cream white sweater you’re hoping to layer it with. across the sweater are thick black vertical lines and a front print that reads stray souls pray for us, among other ominous words you hope will suffice in creating an edgy aura. “i thought maybe we could pair this with some black jeans, a necklace and chuck on a bunch of fake piercings. you’ll look emo, but at least you won’t look horny for a man made out of metal.”
“hey! that’s so disrespectful to iron man!”
“whatever man,” you shove all the clothes in his hands while shuffling toward the bedroom door so you can leave. “i’m going to get changed in the bathroom. just tell me when you’re finished dressing.”
you place your hand on the door knob before halting. oh, right!
whirling around, you rush for your backpack in the corner.
“by the way,” you grin, unzipping your backpack and reaching into it to retrieve something. heeseung stares at you curiously, only to find himself wide-eyed when you yank out a small box from your bag.
“this is for you.” you excitedly grin. “i saw it the other day in a store and it reminded me of you.”
his eyes instantly round in surprise. “this is for me?”
“yeah,” you smile. “i know i told myself no more shoplifting but i couldn’t resist it.”
he gasps loudly. “wait, y-you stole this?” he shrieks nervously, eyes bouncing between you and the box.
you chuckle easily. “well, yeah. i mean, only ‘cause i forgot my purse.”
“i could’ve paid it for you!”
“but then it wouldn’t have been a gift.” you shake your head. “just take it, heeseung. i’ll, uh… drop off the money to them tomorrow.”
he presses his lips into a line, eventually succumbing to your compromise. now, he finally examines the box in his hands, peeking curiously. “but… what is it?” he asks, slowly peeling the wrapping away.
“a jigsaw puzzle!” you explain excitedly. “i just thought—i don’t know, you once mentioned you and your mother like to do jigsaw puzzles together, and… i thought this picture was really pretty.”
he stares at first before a smile instantly sweeps his features. “wow, thank you so much!” heeseung beams, and the sparkle in his eyes makes you feel unimaginably elated. his smile is so damn pretty but it’s even prettier when you’re the reason for it. “so what’s the picture?”
“just some landscape photo.” you mutter, too embarrassed to admit that it’s a sunset. something about admitting this inside joke is frankly a bit embarrassing — what if he’s long forgotten about it? what if this is entirely one-sided?
heeseung giggles as he opens the box and peers at the jigsaw pieces inside it. “ah! a sunset of course.” he bobs his head. “a sunset from miss sunset.” he smiles affectionately, “i love it so much.”
you smile and nod your head once, desperately containing your excitement. can’t show too much, and all at once.
he then captures your attention by rummaging through the pieces and yanking one of them out of it. “here!” he holds it out for you, causing you to stare in bewilderment.
“what?”
“keep it.” he urges.
“but… then you can’t finish your puzzle.” you blink.
“that’s the point!” he giggles. “so you can have an excuse to meet my mom one day.”
.
.
.
you’re nervously staring at your reflection in the mirror, adjusting the way the clothes sit on your body. you had quickly come home and back to heeseung’s to grab a change of clothes, but now you fear that you’d chosen the wrong ones.
or perhaps there was never a “wrong” outfit to choose because they’re all horribly inappropriate. it’s infuriating dealing with your past self — why the hell are all your skirts so damn short?
perhaps you’ve been too focused on dealing with heeseung’s closet to realise that you need a change of your own. the only party attire you own is everything you used to wear, which is a gaudy collection of mini skirts, cropped tops, distressed denim and tops that borderline lingerie. for fuck’s sake, you curse to yourself, fidgeting with the outfit you’re already embarrassed at the thought of heeseung seeing.
you’ve chosen a black mini skirt and a matching sleeveless halter top that knots at the back of your neck, accentuating your shoulders and drawing attention to the bare expanse of your back. this was always one of your go-to outfits — admittedly, it was a crowd favourite, but only because it flatters all your nicest assets and treads the line between flirty and fun.
dreading how heeseung will react on seeing this, you release your hair so it flows down your back and adjust your makeup, forcing a smile at yourself to see your red-painted lips stretch.
“don’t come in; i look stupid.” heeseung mutters when he hears you just outside his bedroom door, so you peer inside before opening it widely with a big grin. seated on the edge of the bed, he turns toward you at the door and opens his mouth to speak before freezing when he sees you.
“w-woah.”
you feel your entire face burn like metal under the sun, because heeseung continues to stare, eyes rounded and mouth slightly ajar. “sorry,” you blush profusely, brushing your hair so that it conceals as much of your top as possible. “fuck, my, uh, closet isn’t very wholesome and so—”
“n-no!” he cries, waving his hands around frantically. “i-i wasn’t thinking that! i promise!”
you stamp your lips into an awkward smile and trail across the room.
“the jewellery fits you really well, by the way.” you comment, appreciating the way his necklace and earrings elevate the overall badass aura this outfit has given him. the sweater makes his shoulders look wide, while the dress-shirt collar that peeks out from beneath it makes him look fashionable. these jeans would look good with some boots, you think, making a mental note of what already exists in his closet.
“your hair looks kinda dumb though.” you scoff playfully, standing in front of him now. “i’ll fix it.” 
“n-no, it’s oka—”
he gulps, leaning back as you slide between the space between each of his legs and reach over to brush his hair with your fingers. bit by bit, you gently untangle any knots and use small amounts of styling cream to get them in the right place. it causes you to occasionally lean in to reach the ends at the back, so he turns his face to the side in an attempt to avoid contact with your chest. “a-ah… um, m-maybe you should—”
“i think it’ll look really nice like this.” you comment absentmindedly, without realising that you’ve completely enveloped him with your scent.
you’re close.
you’re too close, he thinks, but you don’t seem to realise it —  truthfully, you’re a little too focused to have heard heeseung, nor the way his hand is slowly resting on your waist.
then, you feel his fingers brush against the bare skin of your waist just above your skirt, and your whole body freezes.
he’s touching you. heeseung is touching you.
every inch of your skin that he touches sends shivers down your spine, but before you can begin to process what’s happening, he gently pushes you away by a grip on your hips.
“stop.” he mumbles, head hanging low. “please stop, okay?” you stumble back when he pushes you a little further. you stand, dumbfounded and stunned, his fingers burning every inch of the skin he’s touched like a scathing chisel.
did you do something wrong?
is he uncomfortable with you?
how close is too close?
“i-i can do it myself.” he mumbles, desperately concealing his flushed face before rushing toward his bathroom, so quick that you stare off at the absent space left on his seat on the bed.
.
.
.
for the first time, the car ride is silent. you’d like to have the courage to speak up, but the last time anybody had ever spoken was when you’d thanked him for giving you the handbag you almost forgot to bring along. he’d gotten red, dipped his head and muttered a quiet you’re welcome, and that in itself felt like the death of the conversation.
during the car ride to the party, you fiddle with the hem of your mini skirt, plagued with a re-run of what happened in his bedroom. perhaps you’re getting a little too comfortable with him; or perhaps he just doesn’t need your guidance anymore.
now you just feel a moron.
perhaps you shouldn't have decided to come to this party after all.
“s-sorry.” heeseung finally squeaks, so you whip your head toward the driver’s seat. he seems to be nervously clutching the steering wheel with both eyes drilling the road ahead. “i’m sorry.”
what?
“what do you mean?” you frown, though the tension in your body dissipates now that you’re talking again. 
“i’m really sorry.” heeseung gnaws on his lips, his body tense, and his eyes unable to be peeled away from the road. “i just… y-you’re, like, so pretty and everything about you is just... you make me really nervous, you know? i’m sorry i pushed you away, i just kind of… i— nevermind.” his entire reddens while he huffs his cheeks heftily. “y-you just… you look really, um.. wow. you look really, really incredible. and th-thank you for fixing my hair...” 
incredible?
he thinks you look really, really incredible?
you instantly smile, feeling your heart swell with giddiness. not just incredible, and not just really incredible —  but really, really incredible. you bite back a grin, quickly turning to the passenger window in an attempt to conceal your utter delight. you feel like a giddy middle schooler.
“it’s okay.” you whisper. “i’m just really, really glad we’re talking again.” 
.
.
.
heeseung is many things. a smart boy, a loving son, but above everything else, a horrible, horrible drunk.
it doesn’t help that three hours in, you’re one of the only sober people surrounded by drunk morons. it felt like just a minute ago when the two of you were nervously standing outside yuna’s door, ushered inside and offered various drinks (which you pawned off to heeseung).
you glare at him from your seat halfway on the stairs, watching him through the balusters as he chats up lia. she’s been giggling uncontrollably ever since she found out that heeseung is (thanks to you!) super hot now.
fucking bitch.
she’s been playfully touching heeseung and laughing at all his jokes all night. he’s been blushing and timidly telling her more of his probably dumb as fuck chemistry jokes.
truthfully, you don’t even need the vodka — the burning sensation of jealousy inside your chest is enough to keep you flushed. thing is, you can’t even be mad — after all, you’re the one that taught him all the skills to flirt and you’re the one that even encouraged him to come to this lame ass party anyway.
you want to be able to enjoy this party, you really do, but it’s hard when your mind is going haywire. even a party like this — one inside yuna’s spacious house, decked with bottomless drinks, endless entertainment and rnb music — you can’t seem to take your mind off your favourite boy.
huffing in annoyance, you clench your jaw and take a sip of your stupid, cold ass water. water is such a dumb drink. who even likes drinking water? water is dumb and this party is dumb and heeseung is so fucking dumb.
“you look like you’re going to murder someone.”
you look up over your shoulder, past your mascara-laden lashes. standing a few stairs above you is ryujin, with her brows lifted and her hands on her hips. you instantly scowl and groan, turning back around.
“i’m not in the mood.” you tell your ex-best friend. “get lost.”
“bitch, this is my party and you’re telling me to get lost?”
you snap your head back up to stare at her in confusion, only to then connect the dots. right, you almost forgot — she’s friends with yuna.
she watches in amusement as you make the realisation, trodding down the steps to take the seat beside you. okay, this is officially weird — since when were you and ryujin on talking terms?
“your party’s shit.” you hiss at her, thinking about heeseung and a girl you might very soon rip the limbs off. she’s got her hand on heeseung’s arm and he’s blushing profusely because of it. childishly, you make note of where she’s touched so you know never to touch him there ever again. “it’s so fucking lame.”
“honey, you’ve been staring at that little dweeb all night. as if i’m not going to know the only reason you’re pissy is because you’re jealous.” ryujin snorts.
you glare at her again, making her lift her hands up in defence. “sorry, slip of tongue — not dweeb, just… boy. although whatever experiment you’ve been doing on him seems to be working. he’s like… highkey hot now.” she flashes a humorous smile. you press your lips together, unimpressed, instantly returning your gaze back to heeseung.
what the hell? they’re on the couch now?
“whatever.” you mumble, swirling the straw inside your cup. you’re well-accustomed to lying; it’s something that comes natural to you, but for some reason, you don’t even bother to hide your disdain for heeseung and lia.
she’s not right for him.
“taehyun’s coming to pick me up later if you wanna hang with us. we’re probably just going to chill at his house.” she grins.
“easy pass.” you scoff, thinking about the way she’s treated you. “and can you stop talking to me like we’re friends? we’re not, so get lost.”
ryujin offers you a wounded look. “dude, what’s your fucking issue? why are you always acting like you’re better than us? stop being such a pompous bitch.”
you instantly stand looking back at her with a furious gaze. “i’m leaving. don’t talk to me.”
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heeseung doesn’t know love.
he knows many things, like the circumference of various planets and enough digits of pi to bore a whole party to sleep, but he doesn’t know love. after all, he’s never experienced anything remotely close to it.
lately, however, he’s been feeling like he’s inching closer and closer to the real thing.
and it’s all thanks to you.
your dating lessons have clarified a lot of what he always felt unsure about. he’s not the best with people and definitely not with girls, but you bring the clarity he’s always been searching for.
however, engaging in this conversation with lia has thrown out everything he thought he learned about girls.
are conversations always this… boring?
“yeah. isn’t school the worst?” lia giggles.
“haha, yes… i hate school…” heeseung nervously laughs, his smile fading away by the second. how can school be the worst when it’s the best?
he doesn’t mean to be rude, but he’s not having a great time. sitting here on the couch with lia is an experience he’s trying to push himself to have, but frankly the conversation just doesn’t run as smoothly as it does with you. besides, he’s definitely not the only person that’s obviously bored, because every time heeseung opens his mouth to share another fun fact about light bulbs, he can literally see the light in lia’s eyes vanish.
she’s not really having the best time either, yet somehow she’s becoming more touchy by the minute.
it’s contradictory. he doesn’t understand what she’s thinking. and this is not a problem he faced when going on all those fake dates with you.
he’s really, really confused and when he feels this way, there’s only one person that smooths out the mangled mess in his brain — you.
as he quickly tears his eyes away from lia and surveys the area for a glimpse of you, he finds himself more anxious when he can’t. miss sunset, miss sunset, miss sunset… your name repeats in his head like a drum. you’re truly the only thing in the world that makes sense (other than science, of course), and now that the effects of alcohol are beginning to afflict him, he’s finding it more and more hard to be without you.
so he quickly excuses himself from lia and springs to his feet.
“hey! b-but heechul, i thought we could maybe… you know, leave this party together?” she smiles, brows lifted in anticipation.
heeseung blinks. “my name is heeseung.”
her face falls. “oh.”
“i mean, unless my parents are dyslexic and read my birth certificate wrong,” he jokes, snorting at first until he realises she’s not laughing. that’s when his smile instantly vanishes and he dips his head low in shame. maybe he’s only funny to miss sunset. “s-sorry.” he blushes, “i-i really have to go. m-maybe i’ll see you around?”
lia huffs before sighing. “okay, i guess.”
scratching the nape of his neck, he whirls around and begins his search for you.
as he traverses his way through the crowds of people and dodges the spillage of the drinks in their hands, he eventually discovers that he’s making loops around the first storey. ah, he reminds himself, there’s a second storey! he climbs the stairs, taking note of the cups that have been left up along it. there are two — one of which has a familiar lipstick stain he’s pretty sure you’d worn.
he’d know.
after all, he’s been staring at your lips all day.
sparing some time, he neatly stacks the cups together and brings them with him upstairs in search for a garbage container. as he reaches the second storey, he notices a few closed bedroom doors and one which is slightly ajar.
batting his lashes curiously, he hears distant chatter at the bedroom at the very end of the hallway. ignoring it, he walks right across the carpet, locating the bathroom. after discarding the trash, he takes a few minutes of examining his reflection (lia had ruined the hair you made look so pretty) before exiting the bathroom.
then he halts in his feet, because he hears a loud crash.
concerned, he bolts toward the bedroom at the end of the hallway and swings the door open, only to immediately regret his actions afterward.
because he’s just seen something he shouldn’t have.
standing beside the bed, ryujin and taehyun are tangled in each other’s arms. heeseung’s eyes immediately widen as their lips detach and they snap their heads over at him, equally as shocked as him.
oh no.
“oh, for fuck’s sake!” ryujin cries, shoving taehyun away from her as she glares ferociously at heeseung. “what the fuck are you doing here?”
heeseung slowly backs away. “s-sorry.” he raises both his hands, feeling regret and horror trickle inside of him. isn’t taehyun dating his cousin, minjeong? aren’t they both your friends? didn’t you and taehyun have a… thing? his brain hurts.
he continually backs away, before taehyun lunges toward him and yanks him in the bedroom.
“let’s have a little talk, you dweeb.”
.
.
.
“you’re hot. can i have your number?”
“look at me. does it look like i want to give you my number?” you stare at him, boring holes into his eyes until he’s uncomfortable and leaves. you’re not normally this mean when boys try to hit on you, but frankly you’ve had enough of this night.
after your fight with ryujin, you’d driven to a nearby convenience store to grab some snacks for heeseung.
you’d figured he’d be peckish after all that drinking. but now that you’ve returned to the party and the boy is nowhere to be seen (and neither is lia, by the way), you’ve come to a solution that’s driving you crazy.
they’re probably off making out somewhere.
upset, you hold your own pity party in the kitchen by making yourself some iced cola. man, the vodka bottle is looking awfully tempting, but once again you choose to honor your self-development.
however, as two hours pass, you find yourself more and more concerned that heeseung is not off doing what you think he’s doing. you verify this with lia, who states she hasn’t seen him for a while now. the growing concern eventually ruptures inside you and you drop everything to search for heeseung.
“heeseung?” you call as you shove your way through the house. “heeseung?”
you attempt to dial his number but your calls don’t go through. he never turns his phone off.
fuck.
fuck.
fuck.
“heeseung!” you shout as you meticulously scavenge the back and front yard. you become increasingly anxious that you’ve lost the boy — drunk and alone and with people you definitely don’t trust to take care of him. eventually, the time comes for when you decide to search the second storey, though your doubts are high.
when you’re at the foot of the stairs, your heart is hammering inside your chest. is he okay? it’s your one genuine concern, and it makes you furious at yourself for letting your jealousy get ahold of you. why the hell did you leave the party?
this is all your fault.
if anything happens to your boy, it will be all your fault.
climbing the stairs, you notice something odd. where the hell is your cup from before? there’s nobody here you know that would do any sort of cleaning, unless—
you sprint up the stairs and begin slamming open every door you see.
“heeseung?” you continuously echo into every room, finding silence on the receiving end. it’s almost unnerving, because if he’s not here then he’s not anywhere. it makes tears well in your eyes thinking about where he could be or if he’s feeling lost and scared.
that’s when you take notice of the remaining door at the end of the hallway.
“h-heeseung?” you approach the door, opening it.
the room is pitch dark, and at this time of night, the windows offer no shed of light. you see nobody on the bed, and though you almost close the door and leave, you halt at the sound of a soft whimper.
you freeze.
heeseung?
the room falls silent again, so you open the door a little wider. the light from your side now pours inside and you finally make out a figure sitting on the floor.
it’s slumped against the side of the bed, curled up and hugging its legs.
your heart falls into the pit of your stomach.
it’s heeseung.
and he’s crying.
“heeseung? oh my god.” you rush over toward him and fall to your knees, cupping his face in your hands as your chest swells with worry and distress. “are you okay? what happened? what’s wrong?”
your eyes dart everywhere across his features, taking in everything about his expression — his blood-shot eyes, the pink across the tip of his nose and his cheeks, and his tears streaming down his cheeks and now onto your fingers.
heeseung retracts from your touch and hiccups, dropping his face on his knees. at the cursory glance you’d made, you can tell he’s clearly intoxicated. he looks really unwell, but this is certainly not the result of just alcohol — he’s obviously upset about something.
“i-it’s me,” you attempt to placate him, placing a hand on his shoulder to rub his back before he flinches away from you.
“leave me alone.” he chokes out, his soft whisper jagged and broken. you stare in stunned silence, taken aback by his reaction. your head feels like it’s spinning.
“wh-what happened?” you question, mind racing as you attempt to fill in the blanks yourself. did someone hurt him? did someone say something to him? did—
your expression instantly darkens when you recall what had happened earlier. you’d hate to be right. you pray and pray and pray that this is a shot in the dark and your assumption is far too many steps ahead than reality.
“was it… ryujin?” you whisper, feeling your entire body tense.
at the sound of her name, you see him stiffen.
and it’s enough of an answer for you.
you feel fury thrash inside of you and compound in your core. your hands are shaky when you reach out to touch him but he instantly jerks away from you.
“she said something to you?” you whisper, shattered by this realisation.
he pauses before slowly nodding his head.
“just her?”
he shakes his head.
taehyun, that fucking rat bastard.
“i’ll fucking kill them.” you growl, standing up instantly. you’re livid. you can’t even begin to imagine what they’ve done to your boy, but you’re certain you won’t spare mercy. “i’m beat the shit out of them.” you rush to leave, but heeseung grabs your hand before you can go anywhere.
“you can have your puzzle back.” your little sun says. “i don’t want it anymore.”
//
to be continued.
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a/n: hahahahahaha im sorry IM SORRY it was gna happen sooner or later but anyways i am once again BEGGING for ur forgiveness for such a late update; since the next chapter is the FINAL chapter, i will try my best ot be rlly quick. within the next 2 weeks hopefully? 3? anyway idek how i feel abt this final product or w/e but ya girl is ~tired~ and she's very excited to finish this series <33 thank you guys SOSOSOSO MUCH for all the love across the few months it took me to write this. can’t believe we have one more chapter left :< triage & triage!hee have a special place in my heart hehe, so thanks for being a part of this journey <333 anyway pls do support me via liking + reblogging if u can !! :>
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