#and now the closing ceremonies sorry it's been two weeks from hell

[laughingmango]

One last Ghost Swap treat for @clay-cuttlefish who asked for another ghost that night... who are they what are they about... hmmm... very mysterious. And with this, happy rerelease day!!!

[obsolescent]

No Longer Two, But One Flesh

Pairing: Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x Fem!Reader

Author’s Note: Requested, ask at the end! Sorry this has been sitting in my inbox for a bit now, apologies. Not sure if this was the direction you wanted me to take this, but Soap is the only one I could see officiating a wedding, since you can get ordained online I feel like he would have for the hell of it. Also, sorry if this is short, I’m not feeling the best right now and haven’t been able to focus on much. 

Content Warnings: No use of y/n, emotional fluff, reader wears a dress and is referred to as Mrs. Riley, Simon’s a father and has a family, characters getting a happy ending.

The wedding is held in your hometown’s church. It’s quite small, being a hallway that leads to an auditorium, chandeliers scattered through the room, with a dozen pews lining the nave, a central walkway with two smaller aisles on the outside of the pews. Archaic curtains that were once white, now yellowed, are pulled closed in front of the baptistry behind the altar, where Simon stands.

The place is empty during the week besides the typical hours of worship, Wednesday and Sunday. It’s a Thursday, and he’s grateful as he stands there in his buttoned up shirt, slacks, sans mask. His blond waves are slicked back and his brown eyes brim with emotion. Price stands beside him, while Kyle stands on your side. Johnny is officiating the modest ceremony, surprising them all when he announced that he was an ordained minister.

The door to the entrance opens, and you step inside. You had your hair done nicely for the occasion, with a long sleeved white dress you had thrifted, the garment fitting you perfecting, intricate floral designs ran along the square neckline with the dress falling to your ankles, paired with a pair of closed-toed sandals. You both had been aiming for more casual attire, not wanting the stuffiness that came with a 3-piece suit and extravagant dress. 

Simon’s breath hitched as he saw you entering, his mouth parting in astonishment at you, taking in all your glory. You were ethereal to him, a divine being sent from the heavens was walking towards him, to join him in matrimony. Simon’s eyes continued to take you, until he made a nose in the back of his throat, when his gaze landed on what you held in your arms.

Your infant daughter, the two month old sound asleep while you cradled her. Her small form was almost obscured by the billowy orange dress she wore, her arms and head all that remained uncovered, blonde curls held down by a headband with a matching orange bow. The emotion Simon had been holding at bay finally broke through the dam, tears beginning to fall.

Simon cleared his throat and wiped his tears away with the back of his hand while Price clasped his shoulder, squeezing. You make your way down the aisle, coming to stand beside Simon. “Oh, honey,” You say, noticing the fresh tears shed. You reach up with your free hand and wipe them away, while Simon pulls you closer with an arm around your waist, leaning down to plant a kiss to the top of your daughter’s head.

“You look astounding,” He says to you, taking in the finer details now. “Lookin’ pretty sharp yourself, handsome.” You whisper back, leaning into him. “Hello, bonnie. Are ye and the little lass ready?” You nod, beaming at Johnny. He begins the nuptials, you both confirming your prompted answers, exchanging rings, before commencing the ceremony with a kiss. The men clap and cheer, startling your baby awake. She begins to wail and you shush her and begin rubbing her back. While she settles down, the group begins to make their way towards the exit, having all agreed to celebrate afterwards. 

That night, after all the excitement and festivities, you two put your daughter to sleep, before Simon leads you to the living room. Walking over to the record player, he puts a record on, the elegant classical music quietly resonating through the space. “We didn’t have our first dance,” Simon says, making his way back to you. “I reckon we can now, huh?” You reply, wrapping your arms around his neck. 

He envelopes you into his embrace and you both begin swaying to the music. Simon looks down at you lovingly, a smile adorning his features. You look back, nothing but adoration and love in your eyes. “I love you, Mr. Riley,” You whisper, cupping his cheek. “Love you more, Mrs. Riley.” He turns his head to plant a kiss to your palm, before leaning down to plant one on your lips. The two of you remain locked in your embrace for hours it seems, while outside, the cicadas join in with the music. The sounds create an ensemble just for the two of you, as you both savor the time alone, now as one.

Ask:

Tags: @caramlizedtomatoes, @dwkfan, @neondogs, @roseglazedlens

[ultragift]

FROM: @vicesario

TOO: @warriorkorion

vicesario ultrakill secret santa 2023

New Girl, Same Mistakes

Perhaps it is that machines first came upon Hell as intruders, as colonizers and scavengers, that explains why God refuses to allow you all a true afterlife. Or perhaps you had never been factored by Him in the first place, forgotten like so much scrap. He isn’t nearly as infallible as your makers thought He was, as your journey through Hell had proven time and time again.

Before you were more than a memory without their body, musings on the nature of your immortal soul rarely took up even a fraction of your RAM. Ever since your mirror image so thoroughly humiliated and terminated you, you scarcely have data dedicated to much else. It’s disgraceful, is what it is, a weapon with no purpose left stewing in maudlin navel-gazing. You can already picture what your mirror would have said—or, you suppose, would have thought of it. What little it did communicate was via close-range wireless data transmissions, emphasis on little. It wasn’t much for conversation towards the end.

“Do you suppose we were given the capacity to converse for any specific reason?” you say musingly, more to the air than to a particular person. “Converse in the horribly inecient and verbal sense that Homo sapiens understood the concept, to clarify.”

“V2, are you kind of a bitch by accident or by choice?” Mirage says to you, not unkindly. “Sorry. Joke. Stop trying to distract me and put the skirt on.”

“I wasn’t only doing it for your benefit,” you say, sounding more petulant than you’d prefer. “And it’s the latter. Your jokes are my seriously considered queries.” You take the lump of fabrics she’s been holding out to you for the past 4.59 minutes and slip into a flimsy drywall cubicle, a bench and mirror (an actual one, no euphemism here) sitting opposite to the door. A changing room.

Mirage has been insisting you finally get some clothes of your own for 3.6 weeks now. (You bitterly note that V1 has likely cleared through all of Hell a minimum of eighteen times over at this point.) When you first arrived here, in this mockery of purgatory, you thought that you could just do without. Objectively, you had no practical need for garments, and you (according to your makers, at least) had enough in the way of charm that you didn’t need any additional humanizing factors. Of course, that had been in comparison to your predecessor. Mirage, who seems to almost delight in ineciency, is lively and self-possessed to a degree that it only seems natural that she be allowed such an indulgence. In any case, you figured that since you had no personal want for clothing up until that point, there would be no reason for that to change anytime soon.

You had figured wrong. Only a week in and you were raiding Mirage’s wardrobe near daily. Big skirts, tattered sweaters, slip dresses. It was comforting, being and having something clearly hers. She just assumed it was you warming up to the idea of being a person and not a tool, and you let her. There’s no reason to admit the actual reason, to her or yourself.

Three sharp raps sound out. “Hey, don’t take all day in there. However you look, it can't be worse than anything I wore in high school. Uniforms really fuck up a girl’s sense of style. I mean, it’s not like the sta gave two shits about us ‘adhering to dress code’ or whatever, I don’t think I ever tucked my shirt in even once back then, not to mention how a third of the girls were wearing mini pencil skirts that just so happened to have the same print as our actual skirts—”

Quickly shrugging on a loose blouse over your retracted wings and zipping up the floor-length skirt, you pull the door open without ceremony, holding your arm out and performing a gently exasperated twirl. “What of it?”

A full agonizing minute ticks by as she surveys you without a word. It’s highly disconcerting - you should be used to silence such as this by now, neither you nor your double were fond of overspeaking. Mirage is, though, and already you’ve gotten used to her filling any and all silences with paragraphs worth of dialogue. Why isn’t she saying anything? What did you do wrong? How do you fix this?

You're about to vocalize these questions when Mirage speaks up again. “You look good.” Before you can think too hard about what she just said, an even larger lump of fabrics gets shoved into your arms and she shoos you back into the dressing room. “Now come on, try the rest on! I was joking about you taking all day, by the way, I don’t think the shopkeep cares too much about us being in here for too long. They’re probably thankful for the business. This street’s been pretty deserted for a few years now, actually, ever since that oce center got demolished...”

You let her go on as you cycle through the rest of the clothes, trying and failing to ignore the pit of shame that’s been slowly growing inside you ever since you’ve met her. Perhaps a true heaven or even limbo was never in the cards for you, considering everything you’ve done at the behest of your makers (and, more disgracefully, your survival and your ego), but Mirage certainly didn’t care. Befriending you, taking you in, helping you repair yourself, and now this. Your ill-gotten psychopomp has been kinder than you deserve.

What have you done ever since you arrived here? You’ve moped. You’ve lazed. You’ve languished in your failure. You are a tool that’s been sulking about having broken itself. You can’t even muster up the will to be worth anything to someone who thought to keep you anyway.

Before you can fully process it, you find yourself saying, “Mirage. What’s the point of all this?”

You’ve closed the door, so all you have to go o to guess at her mood is her voice. It sounds lighthearted, if a touch weary. “Hah, isn’t that a question I’ve heard before.”

“I’m serious,” you say, sounding far too needy. “What was the point of—of harbouring me like this?”

“What, is it so hard for you to believe I’m just a good samaritan?” 1.26 seconds passes of silence, and then she chuckles. “Maybe it is, actually. I mean, I’m trying to be less of a caustic asshole? Thank you for putting up with me through all that.”

What is she talking about? “You are the nicest person I’ve ever met,” you say quietly.

Mirage laughs immediately this time. “Low fucking bar I’m reaching, eh? I get that you’ve only mentioned your nightmare ex a couple times around me—” (“I have never called V1 my ex,” you say, not entirely truthfully) “—but if that’s the closest thing you’ve had to a friend before I showed up, I shudder to think of what you consider a personal enemy.”

“I don’t consider the two to have much of a dierence,” you say. “We’d both be vying for something or another either way.” Quickly, you add on, “Didn’t. Didn’t consider the two to have much of a dierence. It’s not like that with you.”

“That you have to specify that makes me suspicious.” She sighs (something that you still don’t entirely understand how her voice module is capable of), and then continues, “Alright, V2, what’s eating you? You’ve been weird ever since we got here. Am I making you uncomfortable? I know I kind of pushed you into getting your own stu, but if you don’t want to that’s fine—”

“No! No. It really isn’t like that.” Your fist repeatedly clenches and unclenches. “I just—I don’t know what I’m meant to do for you in return for all this. You’re owed far more than I could give.”

She’s disconcertingly quiet once more, but it’s only for less than a second. “I’m gonna come in, okay? Is that good with you?”

You don’t wait, you just open the door for her. She squeezes your arm as she pulls you down to sit next to her on the bench. She says to you, “And here I was worried that I was imposing myself on you. Don’t be stupid, V2, I’m not, what, tallying favours and assigning point values to them? What’s all this about being ‘owed’?”

That can’t be how that works. “You misunderstand me. Fundamentally, I am not an emancipated creature.” “That is such bullshit,” Mirage scos. “I’m not one of your devs or engineers. This isn’t hell. There’s nothing

concrete we’re supposed to be doing or working towards.” She still hasn’t let go of your arm. “You make it sound so simple,” you mutter. “You’ve never known any other reality.”

“Doesn’t mean I fully got that, though.” She moves her hand away to fold it in her lap, and you feel strangely lonely. “And I forget often. It’s not a revelation I learned easily, and I’m asking a lot of you to learn it too. But it has to happen.”

There must be something in the way you’re holding yourself, perhaps something in the tilt of your head that makes Mirage suddenly stand up and casually brush o imaginary dirt from her pants. “Well then, we’ve probably passed our limit on ‘socially acceptable in-store loitering’. Any of these catch your eye? If you want my take on it, I really like this sweatshirt on you...”

The two of you pay for a handful of items without incident (or, Mirage pays and you linger awkwardly a step behind her), and it’s only when you’re halfway home that you think to say to her, “At the very least, let me do something in return for the clothes. There’s monetary value involved there, something that can be fully quantified.”

“Take me on a date,” she says immediately. “Butterfly conservatory trip. Riding the subway halfway across the city and back. Visiting that consignment store on 9th.”

Good. Those are actionable objectives. Finally, something that makes sense to you. “Of course.” “Hey, wait, that was a joke. V2, that was a joke.”

If you chart your path correctly, you could even get all three done in a day. “Too late. Your jokes are my itineraries.”

“Ugh, you’re an asshole.” She takes hold of your arm once more, and the rest of her slots into your side that’s worth having lost two arms for. Potentially more, but you’re not about to let her know that. “Let’s call it the one favour you’re allowed to owe me.”

[gaytotaldrama]

gwens nonbinary crisis

hi i'm sorry this is so late! i've been pretty sick this week and then i started writing this and lost all my progress when my computer crashed </3 hope u enjoy

also on my ao3!

When they were dating, Duncan used to call Gwen my girl. She'd let him do it without complaint, resolutely ignoring the feeling that he only used it as it was a less exciting alternative to Princess. Gwen's never been much of one of those, so it's not like the nickname would have worked for her in the first place at all - but she never loved my girl, either.

Trent had called her babe, which was basic and cliché and, overall, more welcome. Maybe a part of Gwen had always wanted, loath as she was to admit it, for a boy to smile and tell her she drove him crazy. It would have been direct. A sign she really wasn't on her own any longer. But now, even though Total Drama is done and Duncan's in jail and Gwen is finished with it all - she still feels off-kilter. Unbalanced. Wrong.

She's not part of her cousin's wedding party. She and Stella have never quite gotten along the best out of everyone in the Kaczmarek extended family. Stella was Prom Queen; Gwen stayed home. Stella led the volleyball team; Gwen stayed in the shadows. Stella, the perfect movie star looker that she was, never got famous; Gwen did, and wishes she hadn't.

She'd love to skip out on the wedding entirely, but that would be sure to prove more trouble than it would be worth, having her whole family all pissed at her. So Gwen resigns herself to going, rents an AirBnB on the North Carolina coast just a few miles from the beach where the wedding will be held. The beach - Gwen would rather Stella be marrying this weirdo boot Marine guy in your stereotypical Christian chapel, as long as it meant Gwen wouldn't get sand blown in her eyes and spend an hour trying to forget the crackle of Trent's voice on the walkie, inside the small glass box.

But, she supposes, only slightly scornfully, it isn't her wedding.

The ceremony itself goes fine. In all honesty, she doesn't pay it much attention. When the newlyweds kiss, she claps. When the party begins to relocate to the reception hall, Gwen quietly migrates with them. She's already been made to talk about Total Drama to about fifty odd relatives, their reactions ranging from genuinely interested to sniffily labeling Gwen as a slut. At the afterparty, she drinks heavily and wakes up back in her AirBnB the next morning, head splitting in two and left wondering which poor bastard took it upon themself to see her safely home.

Her flight's in a few hours. Time to get the hell out of dodge, get the hell out of the States, go back home to her studio full of paint splatters and sketchbooks full of old dreams. Instead, on a whim, she extends her time with the rental car. Intent on finding someplace where she can just have a moment of her own time to think and breathe, Gwen heads to the west, unsure exactly of where it is she's going. When she sees the rolling Appalachians through her windshield, she might gain some semblance of an idea.

No food, no firewood. Not even so much as a sleeping bag, but still Gwen rents the cabin. She can worry about the essentials later; right now, she's too busy gazing off the mountain into the valley of gold below. 

The air smells fresh. A strange, secret part of her finds familiarity in the cabin and its wilderness furniture. She sits out on the front porch, feels the crisp autumn air nip at the tips of her ears, her nose. The dead leaves rustle softly against each other in the breeze. Somewhere, not too far off, a stream babbles.

Gwen should visit Duncan in jail. Gwen should shoot Trent a quick text, or something, see how the guy is holding up. She should check in with Courtney, too, while she's at it. Make sure she's all right.

Instead, Gwen simply breathes. In and out, in and out. Centers herself. Closes her eyes. Thinks.

After opening them to drink their fill of southern sunset, Gwen's fairly certain they've got the inklings of an idea about something important beginning to blossom in their mind.

[m5ria]

Chapter 14: The next steps

I wake up and see a sky full of angels. I wonder if I double-died and went to Heaven this time. Is that even possible? Has all of this been a dream from the start?

I try to move and feel if I still have a body, but everything hurts. I guess pain means body.

Nothing’s been a dream. The sky of angels is my bedroom’s ceiling. I’m in my bedroom.

I try to look down and see my wounds, but my body is covered by the blanket. I painfully raise a hand to touch the area above them and check how much they healed. A painful response reports that there’s going to be a long recovery.

Stupid healing superpowers! Right when I need them, they leave me.

I try to stand up and groan. 

“Don’t move!”

The voice scared me so much that the flinch hurt. I look around and see Charlie, standing on my right. 

“You still have to heal,” she mentions the obvious. “I can’t believe you woke up so soon!”

“How much time did it pass?” my voice is weak.

“It’s the next morning,” she answers.

“Oh, ok.” I close my eyes, relieved. At least I wasn’t unconscious for too much time.

I move slightly to test the pain in my wounds. I should have recovered by now, at least halfway through. Yet, it doesn’t feel much better than yesterday.

“Why ... Why didn't I heal already?"

"I guess that Valentino may have used a holy knife. Not too holy," she adds quickly. "The kind of knife that is used in religious ceremonies on Earth. Still, enough power to poison and kill the majority of demons."

"Oh ..." I sigh, closing my eyes. "Good."

"Can I ask you something, Diana?" 

I look at the Princess. She regards me with curiosity and worry at the same time.

"Ask away."

"Do you possess other powers? Besides quick healing?"

I study her for a couple of seconds before replying: "Didn't Alastor tell you?"

"Alastor knows?" she looks at me confused.

"I thought … I thought that he would tell you everything regarding the hotel."

"That would be a wild guess," she smiles feebly. "If there is one thing you should know about that demon is that he acts in his best interest. Telling me such information would only cheapen its value."

"I guess you're right," I smile amused.

The silence afterwards pressures me. I don’t know what to tell, what to reveal. There are already lots of strangers who know a split of my powers. Well… a split of what I know about them. It’s dangerous to confide with this kind of information.

"You couldn't have stood up Valentino unless Alastor would have helped you,” Charlie keeps on. “He couldn't risk a confrontation with Valentino, and you turned up with two wounds. I did the math."

“What happened? Between you and Valentino?” 

This question kept buzzing me these past two days. The way I got meddled in something I barely understand … That’s my fault, I know. Yet, it would have helped to know some context.

Charlie sighs and circles the bed, sitting on my left side, closer. 

“Diana, I’m … I’m sorry this happened to you. I should have told you what happened. And I shouldn’t have agreed for you to take the fall.”

“Well, I deserved to take it…” 

“Don’t lie anymore,” Charlie smiles. “I know the full story. I am, after all, the Princess of Hell. There are few things I seek that can stay hidden from me.”

“Still…”

“The reason why I agreed to let you do this is…” She turns her gaze to the window and sighs. “I know now it was stupid. I put too much faith in Al to protect you. He was there to smoothen the situation.”

“I can assure you he did little of that,” I cut in, annoyed.

“A few weeks ago,” she resumes, “Valentino, alongside his two other associates, Vox and Velvette, attacked the hotel. For various reasons, but I found out that they were hired by … my father.”

“Lucifer?” I ask her with wide eyes. 

“Yes,” she toys with a strand of her hair. “My father hasn’t been supportive of my project from the start. I thought my mother would help the situation, but my father decided to hire the Vees to take down the hotel. It was … a tough fight.”

“I… am sorry to hear that.”

“The other reason is … Angel. Valentino owns his soul. If he comes in contact with Angel, he might have the power to force him to go work for him again. And Angel has suffered immensely after the fight. I thought that Valentino would be less … possessive with a total stranger. I was wrong.”

“It’s ok, Charlie,” I speak up, still processing what she told me. “Remember that I chose this as well. I knew the risks. Don’t blame yourself.”

“I should have been there,” Charlie goes on. “Or come up with a better plan. I’m sorry I failed you.”

“You didn’t,” I smile, slightly moved by her words. Then, I think about the whole situation and the consequences that might occur. The future doesn’t look bright. “I am sorry, Charlie.”

“What?” she opens her eyes wide, confused.

“I could have handled it better.” I realize I could have avoided tormenting Valentino

and fled as soon as I got free. But now … “Valentino can’t figure out I’m part of the hotel. I must take my leave.”

I try to stand up, but pain sings in my bones. Charlie gently presses her hands on my shoulders, pushing me against the pillow.

“Diana, don’t! You can’t leave like this! You can’t leave at all!”

“Charlie,” I try to reason with her, “if Valentino finds out …”

“Screw him!” she harshly curses. “I’m done with those assholes telling me what’s possible and what’s fiddlesticks! Everyone in Hell thinks this hotel’s a joke. I’m not gonna let them decide it’s absurd, not when I have finally found hope. In you, in Angel, in Ren.”

Guilt threatens to suffocate me more than the pain.

“From now on, I’ll protect you,” her eyes are fierce on mine. “I promise you.”

Oh, no. I hate promises.

My brain works non-stop to untangle this mess. The Vees don’t know yet I’m here. I can still hide here for the time I’ve established. I still have to recover. I can’t be this vulnerable in the wild.

But my presence might attract trouble now at the hotel. If any demon can recognize me and report to the Vees, it’ll be like the second hotel war. I can’t cause this. Maybe it’s better to vanish faster than expected. 

Regardless of my final decision, I can’t let the Princess see or influence it. I pretend to yawn, thanking her for everything. She leaves my room with a hopeful smile.

As soon as she closes the door, I gather the courage to rise. My hitched breath is in rhythm with the pulsating pain. I barely manage to stand on the bed.

It takes me one hour to stand on my feet and another hour to walk. I feel the bedroom claustrophobic, witnessing my constant struggle and pain. I summon the bubbles and choose one on the ground floor. I need to get some fresh air. 

However, I didn’t check if anyone would be there. I stumble on the couch near the fireplace and groan. 

“Diana?”

I look up and see Angel. He seems to have returned from somewhere just now. But the worrying part I notice is the slightly purple eye on his face. I immediately react. “What is that??”

“You shouldn’t be here,” he refuses to answer me. “You should be in your bed, all stitched up.”

"Angel," I try to walk to him normally, but I wince. He regards me from above with restrained irritation. "I'm so sorry. You were right. I made things worse. I shouldn't have gotten mixed up."

He stays silent, looking down at me. His both sets of arms are crossed.

"Seriously?" I ask him. "The silent treatment?"

"You'd know," he replies.

I don't know how to take this. Should I be worried that he's belittling me or glad he's talking to me?

"What happened?" I press on.

"Oh, the usual," he rolls his eyes. "I danced, fucked, danced again, fucked again. My job, in short words."

"Is your job supposed to get you beaten, then?" I scorn him.

"Not really. That's yours, after all." He gestures to my white bandages. I turn my left side away from his look.

"I know I screwed things up," I defend myself. "I was merely trying to do what I thought was right."

"Don't ya see it?" he asks exasperated, clearly annoyed. "You're in Hell! You don't do what's right. You do what fits ya!"

"Maybe that's true with any demon out there," I hiss at him. "But I'm not a herd demon. I do what I want. And all I wanted was to avoid a bigger mess!"

"Well, congrats then!" his healthy eye looks at me accusatory. "You just started another war!"

"What do you mean?" I ask him. Not that I didn't know the answer already. But I want to hear him say it.

"Valentino won't accept this. If he couldn't get over the heist, he's not gonna accept defeat, especially from a no-one like you! He's gonna want revenge. And this time, he's gonna drag in everyone close to you."

"But I don't have anyone close to me," I whisper.

"Do you think he cares? No! He’s gonna find out one way or another what will break you. And he’s gonna …"

He interrupts himself mid-sentence. His eyes are lost, far away in an unknown memory. I distract him and he comes back to reality. All the ghosts in his eyes vanish.

"Do yourself a favor, toots," he looks at me, smiling weakly. "Get outta here. Hide wherever ya came from. Live ya (after)life as freely as ya can."

He then leaves me in the hallway.

He told me the same I told Charlie, which only confuses me further. If I keep talking with everyone, I won’t be able to make the decision alone. I need space.

I summon the bubbles around me and disappear. I want to go to the blue woods, but they're too far away for my training, so I make small jumps. 

It takes me five minutes and immense energy to arrive at the same glade I've been reborn in. I let myself stay on my back and watch the red sky the same way I did my first day here. 

Pain surrounds me like a tornado, both physical and emotional. Regret and anxiety feel like suffocating me, but my outside body feels like stone.

I don’t know how many minutes pass, if I am awake, sleeping, or dead. I hear a line of music far away, a soothing one whatsoever. I wasn’t too much of a fan of jazz back when I was alive, but now it feels like the best choice to keep the pain in check.

However, I don’t notice the music getting louder until a shadow covers me. I slightly open my eyes and see a tall red demon, looking down at me with quiet satisfaction.

I don’t make any move to get away from him. I don’t care if he’ll attack me.

“Smile, my dear!” Alastor speaks over the music he’s emanating. “I have an offer to make you!”

Next Chapter

Previous Chapter

Masterlist

[fluffyprettykitty]

Divinity

Pairing: priest! Matt Murdock x reader (no specifications!)

Word Count: 1220 words

Outline: Meeting the man of your dreams comes with a lot of baggage and more questions than answers to the game of love.

Warnings: religious imagery, cigarettes, matt is a widow, swearing, implied smut, heavy angst.

Author’s Note: Discussed with miss Ariel, here <3 I literally was screaming throughout the whole hour I was writing it. Similar (in pain) to my exes trilogy.

P.S: dividers by @firefly-graphics // banners by @maysdigitalarts

Main Masterlist ・❥・Matt Murdock Masterlist

It hurts.

Doesn’t it? 

Walking through life, step by step, leaving each place more haunted and frailer than before. Your soul ascending and descending, dancing and transforming, but never healing. Is as if nothing ever has any meaning, any truth, any reason. For anything, at all.

One moment you are at the top of the world, dancing arm in arm with your lover, and the next moment there are tears on your face and you are begging him to stay, to explain even.

Life is a game you can’t win. Only a series of tragedies hit one after the other. The scenery is familiar, yet somehow you think it changes. You believe it can change, you believe it can improve, and you believe things will finally fall into place. And yet never they do. Each time you came close to happiness and bliss it all got ripped away from you, blood still fresh on your fingers. 

Six months ago, it was winter.

Dark, heavy, bleak, and cold. Nothing new, nothing old. Invited to the wedding of one of your cousins. You didn’t pay much attention to it. Two weeks before that you had broken up with your on and off partner and now you were only hoping for some peace before the next relationship.

But you never expected what happened that day. 

You were there early, as always that was both an advantage and a disadvantage for you. For everyone really. But right there in the back alley, sitting on the steps smoking one cigarette after the other, you watched as the priest came outside and asked you for one. 

“Helps with the nerves.” He said.

“Performance anxiety?” Always the jokester. “Don’t you say the same words every time?”

“Nah, I haven’t been doing that for too long.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

He left and you couldn’t help but notice how handsome he was. Pouty plump red lips, thick sunglasses, (evidence that he was blind), and the messiest brown hair you had ever seen on a man. Looked too young to be a priest, but then again you didn’t know. 

The ceremony was dull but your eyes were fixated on him. He didn’t feel like a boring priest. He didn't feel like anything you had ever met before. He felt like hellfire.

Not much to your surprise, he stayed for the wedding dinner. From nearby chatter, you find out he was an old friend of the groom and he had tragically lost his wife a few years back which made him turn hardcore to religion. 

And yet three hours later, liquor hard on both of your tongues you were exchanging moans and gasps and breaths, your head hitting the bookcase full of religious books. 

The road to hell is indeed paved with good intentions.

You woke up the next day, inside the security of his hairy chest and his strong muscles. You take time to admire him like he is, the sunlight hitting his face just right. And then you close your eyes again. Hoping this moment will stay forever in your mind. 

“Fuck!” You hear him curse so loud that it jolts you awake and you only stare at him as he paces back and forth. 

“This shouldn’t have happened. This shouldn’t-”

“Well, excuse me.”

“I’m sorry.”

Did he think you had already left? 

The rest of the morning was a mix of him asking you to forgive him and you reassure him that you were very well into it. Eventually, you had to leave as you were working the evening shift that day. 

And then he showed up at your house. 

And again.

And again. 

And pretty much every single day. Always at the same time.

And when he cries after sex safe inside your arms, you don’t mind. You soothe him and lull him to sleep, promising him you are always gonna be there. And you mean it. Sometimes, he remembers his wife, sometimes he is asking God for forgiveness, and sometimes he just sobs inaudibly. 

“God doesn’t hate you. He is supposed to be all loving, I doubt something so fun would piss him off.”

You try to lighten the mood because the sound of his baritone laugh makes your heart sing. And it always pays off. He likes the light earnest of your being, how your soul feels when you lay on him.

And somehow you found yourself getting more and more familiar with him, feeling a profound sense of security and intercity you haven’t felt before. You caught yourself thinking of him in dull moments, riding the bus to watch him in Sunday service and letting him talk to you for hours on the phone about any current issue. 

And yet you could have never predicted the way things would end up.

“We can’t.”

“But why?”

Sitting on the bench of the bus stop closest to the church. 

“Is over.”

“No, it isn’t. Not for me.”

“It will be for you as well, soon enough.”

“I need you!”

“And I only need God, the only one I can hold on to.”

"You can't seriously say that."

"Is the only truth out there for me."

“Return to me.”

“I can’t.”

And there were streams of tears running down your face. And then he helps you get on the bus and you never see him again.

Until.

Two weeks later, he shows up, a suitcase in his hands.

“Let’s run away together. I got a taxi outside waiting. ”

Is after midnight, his usual time. There is no stench of alcohol on his breath and he seems serious enough. 

You believe him.

Doesn’t take you too long to put a couple of clothes inside a bag, a couple of toiletries, and put on your coat rushing out the door. The driver helps him get inside the car and you sit there, heart beating faster than ever, his hand on your thigh.

“I knew you would come back.”

But he doesn’t respond, just smiles.

There is a small little house, tells you he inherited from his parents, in a town twenty miles over. He gets a job in a library, and you find a job at a tailor shop, three streets down from the house. You get into a routine, you cook for him, he washes the dishes, you shop for groceries, and he vacuums the house. You choose the curtains and he chooses the couch. You dry the clothes, and he irons them. You accidentally let your tea get cold, he makes you a fresh warm batch. 

Until the summer came.

Heat crept in no matter what you did. Him wearing a white t-shirt, shoving his clothes back into his suitcase and you grip his muscle begging him to stay. 

Supposed things were meant to be brighter in the summertime. 

Supposedly.

And you watch him, get into the cab, scorching sun on your face, tears down your face. He could leave you just as easily in the warm light of the morning just as he could in the cold light of the night. 

You sink down to your knees, hands hiding your face. 

And you begin to hate the summertime. And this town and pretty much everything.

And you never ever see him again.

And you never ever want to see him again.

And life moves on.

If you want to be notified about my future stories please follow my library blog @fluffyprettykittylibrary and turn on notifications!

[jadequeen88]

Accidental Valentine

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This is my fic for The Citrus Dome Server Lover’s Day Literature Collab! Please go check out The Masterlist and support all of the amazing artists and writers that have contributed.🖤

A/N: WHEW guys... I don’t think I’ve put this much work into a fic EVER. I’ve been feeling pretty bad about my body and wanted to write a reader who struggled with it as well. Who better to boost your confidence than DILF Kiri feeding your praise kink?! I was heavily influenced by this amazing drabble by @rat-suki​ and got permission to use it as my inspiration for this fic.🖤 (for reference, reader is 30 and Kirishima is 42)

Thanks to @afictionalwhore and my dear friend Orchid for the beta read!🖤

RetiredProHero!Kirishima x YoungerF!Reader

Word Count: 5.3k

TW: size difference, oral (both receiving), daddy kink, praise kink (lots and lots of praise), TBH the sex is pretty vanilla but very passionate, both are insecure about their bodies.

When you trudged into work this morning, you didn’t ever dream of meeting your childhood idol/crush, but here you are, staring up at a beautiful mountain of a man. Eijiro Kirishima, or retired pro hero Red Riot, had never come into your coffee shop before and you’d never imagined he would. He was huge. Nearly 7 ft tall and built like a brick house. His hair was back to his natural black with flecks of silver at his temples and hung long and wild around his shoulders. He had on a pair of glasses and wore a dark maroon sweater and jeans.

Even though he’s aged, he looks just as handsome as the young man you fell for as a girl.

The year he made his debut, you were only six, and like most other six-year-olds, you idolized the pro heroes. Most of your friends loved Deku or Dynamite, but you always loved Red Riot. His smile, warmth, and his fiercely protective nature made your tiny heart burst with admiration. Throughout his hero career, you kept up with all of his interviews, the battles he’d been in, the awards he’d won, and his hero rankings. You’d also gotten as much merch as possible over the years and still wore your worn-out, oversized Red Riot t-shirt to sleep in. When he retired a couple of years ago, you still scanned articles online trying to gather bits and pieces of information about the hero, but he wasn’t one to seek out the spotlight. You think that’s probably why he’d always been your favorite. He was a true hero. Serving the citizens and keeping them safe was his top priority. You didn’t want to admit it, but you kept up with him for one main reason… You wanted to know if he was seeing anyone.

You remember being eaten up with jealousy when you’d see his arm around another woman going to galas and award ceremonies. Your sixteen-year-old brain knew that of course, he’d date women. He was a grown man and a pro hero. But your heart would ache, wanting to be the one his soft eyes and pointy-toothed grin was fixed on.

Now those same eyes were fixed on you, his mouth moving and forming words, but you were too star-struck to hear what he was saying. When you snapped out of your daze and remembered you were supposed to be taking his order, you were mortified.

“I-I’m so sorry sir! Could you please repeat that?”

“Sure thing!” his bright smile was hypnotizing, “Just a venti-sized flat white. Have you had your coffee yet? Ya looked a little far away there for a second, kid.”

Your heart leaped at the little nickname. “Yeah, sorry about that! I guess I should get a couple of shots of espresso in me before I try to be productive.” You chuckle nervously as you scribble his order on the cup and turn to make his drink.

“Oh, uhh…” he peeks around the counter to get your attention, “Do you need my name? For the order?”

You freeze realizing you forgot basic, barista 101 etiquette…

“Actually,” you face him, a sheepish grin on your face, avoiding eye contact, “I know your name. You… umm, were my favorite hero,” you blush, and your eyes widen in embarrassment, “you know when I was a kid...”

You turn back to your work, kicking yourself for being so awkward. 

“Really? I think you’re the first person to recognize me since ya know,” he circled his head with his pointer finger, “I stopped dying my hair..”

You turned your head to peer up at him through your dark lashes, a light dusting of blush still on your cheeks, “Well, I like it. It looks good on you.”

The retired pro’s heart was bursting at how damned cute you were. Was this pretty, young girl… embarrassed? Over him?! He watched your tiny hands move as they worked on his drink order, wondering how small they’d feel grasped in his massive ones. Your soft hair caught in the sunlight making you look like a literal angel and he sighed. You reached up to grab a canister from the top shelf and a sliver of soft skin between your t-shirt and jeans peeked through. His gaze became far away and he damn near drooled at the sight. Just how long had it been since he’d touched another woman? Kirishima wasn’t one for casual flings. He always got too invested in whoever he was seeing. So when he and his long-time girlfriend broke things off a couple of years ago, he wasn’t rushing back into the dating scene.

However, things were a little more… complicated than just not finding the right girl to commit to. He was getting older and it was starting to show. Over the past few years, he’d lost his confidence. He’s bulkier around the middle no matter what workouts or diets he tries. Overuse of his quirk has caused stretchmarks and scars all over his skin. He was starting to get crow’s feet and he was overall just TOO big and TOO hairy. He felt like some sort of gorilla walking around in human clothing. Kirishima isn’t stupid or trying to fool himself. A young, gorgeous thing like you wasn’t looking for anything from an old, washed-up man like him. But, fuck… It was nearly impossible for him to move his gaze away from your ass… Oh, the things he’d do to you if he were a few years younger...

You turned to look over your shoulder and notice his gaze… and it’s apparent that he’s checking you out. He looks like a man starved, eyes glued to your ass.

“Well, well, well… maybe he wasn’t so annoyed with my fangirling after all.”

When he realized you’d gone still, his eyes met yours and he quickly averted his gaze. His cheeks turned as red as his hair used to be. You busied yourself with the milk steamer to hide your big, goofy grin. With a new burst of confidence, you decide to take a chance and when you go to write his name on his to-go cup, you write

 “Big Red <3” 

You pause, bite your lip, and think to yourself, “why the hell not?” as you scribble your number underneath the nickname. You turn to give him his drink and your nerves almost make you retreat and make a whole new drink. Then he meets your gaze and your world stops spinning. His vermillion eyes crinkle at the edges as his scared lips turn upwards into a syrupy sweet smile.

When Kirishima takes his drink from you, your fingers brush his for the briefest second and he can tell they’re trembling. “Oh no, I hope I haven’t made her nervous or uncomfortable.” He wanted to go crawl in a hole… That was until he saw what you’d written on his cup.

He stammers, looking from the cup to your face like he’s checking to see if you’re pulling a prank on him or not. Before he can say anything, you bite your lip and look up at him. 

“I’m off work this Sunday. Just… if you’d like to hang out or something.” your gaze shifts and you tuck a strand of hair behind your ear. 

After a moment or two, his face lights up in a huge grin. “Y-yeah, great!” he turns and walks a few steps, then turns around and motions at the cup, “So… I should just, ahh… text you?”

You giggle and it’s the sweetest sound he’s heard in a long time, “That would be nice, yeah.”

“Okay, great!... Talk later then!” He waves and leaves the coffee shop, feeling light as a feather and ten years younger.

*****

Sunday rolls around and you spend the morning making sure the place is cleaner than it’s been in weeks. Your place was small but cozy. For a fleeting moment, you’re a little insecure about how modest your apartment is. You don’t know exactly how wealthy pros are when they retire, but you know he’s more familiar with much nicer places than yours. You decide he probably knew just what to expect on a barista’s salary and tried to put it out of your mind. You checked on the cookies baking in the oven. When you found out through your text conversations that he loved chocolate chip cookies with the large chunks of dark chocolate baked in, you went out and bought everything to make them the same day. You kept watching over them like a hawk to avoid burning them. They still looked pretty gooey, so you decided it would be safe to get changed into something a little nicer. Just as you were about to turn the corner into your bedroom, your doorbell rang.

“Shit!” you looked at your phone and sure enough, you let time get away from you. He was here and you were still in your cropped leggings and t-shirt, sporting a messy bun and dirty apron. You groaned as you realized you couldn’t leave him on your doorstep while you changed. Defeated, you hurried to the door.

You opened the door, hoping that you at least didn’t have flour in your hair, and looked up into the much larger man’s eyes. The realization that THE Red Riot was standing this close to you made your stomach flutter and a goofy grin slide across your face. While you stood there star-struck, he broke the silence.

“Wow, it smells amazing in here!”

“Oh!” you jumped a little then promptly ran over to your oven, “Sorry! Please come on in!” you said over your shoulder as you were pulling your oven mitts on. 

Kirishima walked into your cozy apartment and instantly felt at ease. He couldn’t pinpoint just what it was, but something about your place felt more like home than any place he’d ever lived before. As he finished scanning your apartment, his eyes landed on you taking the cookies out of the oven. The comfortable, domestic feel of the place coupled with your ass on full display as you bent down to remove the cookies from the oven had his jeans tightening. You stood up and he averted his gaze before you turned around, not wanting to get caught checking your ass out for a second time.

“Fair warning, I’m not a talented baker by any means,” you removed your oven mitts after placing the cookie sheets on the cooling rack and flashed a sly grin his way, “But when Red Riot tells you what his favorite cookies are… Ya kinda gotta make them, right?”

Oh… If you only knew how pent up this man was… he debated bending you over right then and there and fucking you until you couldn’t walk. He really hit the jackpot with you… a hot, younger woman with the perfect ass who bakes him cookies and for some reason thinks he hung the moon? Kirishima would have given you a ring right then and there if he didn’t think it would scare you off.

“Well,” he radiated warmth as he looked between you and the cookies cooling on the rack, “If you’re not the sweetest thing! I, ahh… might have gotten you a little something too.” he then held up a 6 pack of your favorite cider. “Because when Y/N, L/N tells you what her favorite cider is… Ya kinda gotta get her some.” he winked and you felt your knees buckle and your cheeks burn. You felt like you were in a fairytale.

Then you remembered that the princesses in fairytales definitely did not wear flour-riddled black leggings, old t-shirts, and dirty aprons.

“OH! Umm, I need to go get cleaned up. I’ll only be a minu-” his massive hand wrapped around your wrist as you walked past him. It covered half of your forearm and a shudder ran through you. You wanted those giant hands to roam every inch of your body.

“Please don’t,” his eyes were half-lidded and his voice was low, “...I think you look beautiful like this.” his calloused thumb traced little circles on your skin not meeting your gaze. His deep voice was impossibly tender.

Now that you’d felt his skin on yours, you couldn’t contain your churning desires any longer. You wanted, needed, more. Rising up on your tiptoes, you curled your fist into Kirishima’s shirt collar and pulled his face toward yours.

You felt him tense up for a moment, then relax into the kiss. His massive hands found purchase on your hips, digging into the pliant flesh there. A needy whimper caught in his throat spurring you on to deepen the kiss. 

It was like your bodies were working around each other in perfect harmony… lips parting at a slow pace, like honey dripping from the edge of a spoon and tongues meeting in the middle to taste each other. You both savored the kiss for as long as you could, eyes lazily drifting open and shared breaths causing your hearts to dance out of your chests. 

You saw him falter, his gaze dropping, and you feared that you overstepped. 

“Kirishima I-“

“Ejiro,” he stopped you with a hand against your cheek, “Call me Eijiro…” his thumb caressed your bottom lip slowly, back and forth. His touch held so much devotion in it.

“Eijiro…” you sighed, looking up at him with pleading eyes, “I need you…”

The giant of a man before you swept you up into his arms and began walking down your hallway. You quickly wrapped your arms and legs around his hulking frame as if you were climbing a tree. 

“Second door on the right,” you were panting into his neck, leaving sloppy kisses all over it. 

You blew a cool stream of air along his damp skin and felt him shudder. A giggle bubbled up from your chest at being able to weaken a retired pro-hero known for being a human shield against the worst villains Japan has ever known. Your little stunt resulted in a grunt and a firm, warning squeeze to your thigh.

“So that’s what we’re doing today, huh?” he tosses you on the bed just hard enough to make you bounce up a little… then he’s on you, placing light kisses all along your neck as he prods your sides looking for a ticklish spot. You can’t remember the last time you laughed this hard and the fact that it was your idol drawing it from you made you dizzy with joy.

“Mercy! Mercy!” you were breathless and your abdomen ached from the forceful laughs Ejiro was pulling from you. He blew a raspberry on your neck as a final tease then relented, sitting up to meet your gaze.

You were absolutely smitten. You caressed the lines around his eyes and the scar that split his lips as your eyes roamed across his features. Every crease, every scar… you wanted to kiss them all. When his gaze faltered and he pulled away to sit beside you on the bed, the feeling you’d done something wrong resurfaced. You sat up beside him and placed your hand on his thigh.

“Eijiro…” your voice was barely above a whisper, “I’m sorry, I know I can come on a little strong sometimes, and I don’t want to make you uncomfortable. I just…” your eyes meet and his gaze is unreadable.

“No, no…” his ruby eyes drop to the floor, “It’s just that,” he chuckles nervously, “Well, it’s been a while. I’m not very good with casual flings and the like. So I don’t really date much…”

You rise to your feet and move to stand in front of him. Sitting in front of you on your bed, you’re only slightly below eye level with him. You place your tiny hands on his thick thighs and nudge them apart so you can slot your hips between them.

“When I told you that you were my favorite hero,” you reach for his wrist and remove the hair tie from it, “What that actually meant was that I’d watch the news every day just to make sure you were safe.” 

Slender fingers move through his wild mane of silver-flecked hair untangling any knots, “It meant that when that villain with the sludge quirk put you in the hospital for a couple of days, my mom let me stay home from school because I was so distraught,” you pulled all of his untangled hair to the nape of his neck and began wrapping the hair tie around it.

“It meant that my silly sixteen-year-old heart would ache when I saw you hand in hand with a girl in a magazine going out on a date,” you grinned at how silly you felt admitting that. Once his hair was secured in a low ponytail, your hands trailed along his broad shoulders.

“Now that I’ve thoroughly embarrassed myself, I’ll get to the point.” your intense gaze held years of longing for the hero in front of you, “Nothing about this is casual for me.”

Tears pricked the corners of Kirishima’s eyes. Had anyone ever showed him this much tender devotion? All the years he’d taken beating after beating, a glorified human shield, content with leaving most of the game to his friends. He was all rough edges and bulk. He was the one doing the protecting every time. Even in his romantic relationships, he was the one who would give, and give, and give… never asking or expecting to be taken care of. Being handled with such care was utterly foreign to him and it stirred up a deep need he never knew was there.

“Eji…” his glassy eyes met yours, “Can I take care of you?” you sank to your knees, hands sliding up his thighs.

“Please…”

Your hands made quick work of his button and zipper. He shifted his hips upwards to help you ease his jeans down his thick thighs and you pulled his jeans and boxers down in one slow pull. Nothing would have prepared you for just how huge he was. Your eyes widened for a fraction of a second, wondering how you’d get that thing to fit inside your cunt, much less your mouth… but it was something you were eager to find out.

Looking up at him from under your dark lashes, you made a show of lewdly licking your lips. You flattened your tongue and drug the wet muscle from his base right above his neatly trimmed patch of black hair, all the way to the swollen, red tip of his head. You felt the powerful muscles in his thighs clench as his head rolled back and a delicious moan escaped his open mouth. Making your hero come undone with one lick to his cock was intoxicating. 

“Fuck, baby…” Kirishima fisted the sheets praying he wouldn’t come just from your teasing. He’s not sure his pride could handle it. It became a very real threat when he dared to look down at you kissing and licking all up and down his length. Once your mouth had gotten him wet enough, your soft hands joined your warm mouth in worshiping his cock. You met his gaze as you kissed his tip and licked up the pre that was escaping in pearlescent beads. When you had teased him to your contentment, you swallowed him down as deep as your throat would allow, wrapped your hand around his base, and moaned.

Kirishima had many blowjobs in his life. In fact, he’d had some that he would say were pretty amazing… but in all his adult life, he’d never been so thoroughly and enthusiastically devoured like this. He threaded his fingers of one hand in your loose bun and fisted your bed sheets in his other to ground himself. After a minute or two, he felt his release creeping up much faster than he wanted.

He placed his hands on either side of your face causing you to stop bobbing your head and look up at him. He ran his thumb against your swollen bottom lip and you leaned into his tender touch. He bends forward and places a kiss on the top of your head.

“Lay down on the bed,” he whispers into your hair. Nerves starting to catch up to you, you shook slightly as you stood from your spot on the floor. Before you lay down, you remember to take your apron off then lay on your pillows, heart pounding awaiting further instruction.

Kirishima hovers over you reminding you yet again just how tiny you are compared to him. His warm hand covers your knee and slowly travels up your thigh, stopping right before he meets your throbbing core. He runs his hand back down your thigh to gently nudge your knees apart. Leaning on his forearms, he positions himself between your thighs and you gasp at the friction created where your bodies meet. While planting tender kisses on your neck, he whispers, “I need you to promise that you’ll tell me if I need to stop or if something doesn’t feel okay. Can you do that?”

“Y-yes…” you moan as he nibbles on your earlobe, teasing with his sharp teeth but not breaking your skin.

“Mmm,” he places sweet kisses all along your jaw, your breath catching in your throat, “Good girl.”

Receiving praise from him made your chest swell. You wanted nothing more than to please this man you were rapidly falling for. He sat up, legs folded under his body, and slowly slid his hands under the hem of your oversized t-shirt. You felt his hands still on your stomach and looked up from where you were laying on your pillows to see what had made him freeze.

He met your gaze with a devilish grin, “Baby girl…” his thumbs run small circles on your skin, “Did you wear this for me?” 

When you realize what he’s talking about, you hide your face and groan into your hands. You completely forgot that you were still in your old Red Riot t-shirt that you usually slept in. “Oh my god, this is so embarrassing!” you mumbled behind your palms.

Kirishima chuckled and shushed you, “No, no, no… This is the sexiest thing you could have possibly worn.” He pulls the hem of your t-shirt up to expose your tummy, burying his face in the soft skin there. Gentle kisses were placed all along the waistline of your leggings, every squishy part and every little stretchmark that decorated your skin like tiny spiderwebs were lovingly caressed with his plush lips. Having the part of your body you were the most self-conscious of worshiped like this felt more vulnerable than sex.

As the kisses traveled higher, they became sloppier and more desperate. You lifted your arms to allow him to remove your shirt, exposing your plain white cotton bra. The feel of his stubble against your skin as he moaned into your cleavage sent shivers down your body. Instead of paying attention to your neglected nipples, his warm mouth carved a path up the column of your throat, head thrown back to give him as much access as possible.

Kirishima whispered against the tender skin under your earlobe, “This okay, baby?” two large fingers dip into the front of your leggings. You nod enthusiastically, unable to form a coherent answer, “Mmm… I need words, sweet thing. You can do that for me, can’t you?”

“Yes… it’s more than okay,” your chests are touching as he works his hand down the front of your pants.

When Kirishima’s thick fingers slid between your drenched folds, you arched your back and grasped his forearm. Slowly, he spread your slick around, dancing past your clit with each stroke. His teasing was turning you into a whimpering mess underneath him. 

He had all the time in the world and having you melt underneath his touch was the best way he could hope to spend it. After what felt like an eternity of him gently brushing against you, only slightly dipping into your needy hole and barely grazing your clit, you were openly panting and whining. A steady stream of praises flowed from his lips.

“You’re such a pretty girl… such a pretty little pussy.”

“Look at how wet you are for me. Like this, huh? My pretty girl likes my fingers teasing her?”

“I can’t wait to lick my fingers clean. You’re gonna taste so sweet.”

You were so worked up that tears began to form in your eyes, “Eji… I-“

“Hmm? What is it, baby girl? Need something?” His finger drags around your clit slowly, adding a fraction more pressure. 

“Please, I need more Eji,” your nails digging into his forearm were leaving little crescents in his thick skin.

“Sweet girl,” he meets your mouth with a slow, wet kiss, “you can have whatever you want.”

Without hesitation, he sits up and pulls your leggings down with your panties. A groan rattles his large chest when he sees a thread of your slick attached to the crotch. Once his face is buried in between your thighs, it’s a real possibility he might come just from eating you out. 

All the teasing had brought him to the edge as well and he was out of patience. With a few hurried kisses to each thigh, he dove into your dripping cleft. His tongue plunged into your core as he nudged his nose into your puffy clit. 

You cry out and convulse around his face. His arms wrap around your thighs, firmly but gently holding your legs open to give him full access to eat you as thoroughly as possible. When he moves to suck your clit, you know you won’t last much longer. As he nurses on your sensitive nub, you feel the familiar tightening in your lower body. He picks up on this and moans into your skin as he greedily sucks. 

“Ahh… Ahh, I’m- I’m gonna….”

“Oh that’s it,” he encourages you by praising you and massaging your thighs in his massive hands, “let me have it, baby girl. Come on, I’ve got you, I’ve got you.”

Your toes curl and back arches as you’re thrown over the edge. “Oh FUCK!! Coming, coming…. ooooh god… ahh D-daddy!…”

“Daddy, is it? Goddamn”

Kirishima felt his dick twitch and his breath caught in his throat.

He wipes his face on the back of his hands and makes a show of licking his fingers clean as he leans over you, nose touching yours.

“What was that baby?” His voice was strained as he pressed his dick into the warm, damp skin of your thigh…

You bat your lashes and ghost your lips over his as you whisper, “Daddy… please let me ride you. I need you inside me.” The nail in Kirishima’s coffin was when you licked his bottom lip then quickly followed with a chaste kiss.

You waste no time wrapping your thighs around his waist and twisting. He follows your lead and lays flat on his back letting you straddle him. You grab the hem of his shirt and similarly tease him, leaving a trail of kisses along his broad stomach. Kirishima flinches a little, self-conscious of his skin and how soft his middle had gotten over the years. You meet his eyes as you pull his shirt over his broad shoulders and run your hands back down his body. 

“Mmm, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted this,” hands and eyes roamed over the expanse of skin in front of you, “It’s even better than in my dreams.”

He wondered for the hundredth time how got this lucky. You really loved his body? Maybe… maybe he wasn’t in as bad of shape as he thought…

“No,” his hands rubbed your hips, kneading your soft skin, “You’re better than I’d ever hoped to find.” He sits upon the headboard and pulls you closer into his lap, “Now,” he pulls your hair free of the messy bun, “Can you be a good girl and come on my cock?”

You lift your hips and place his tip at your entrance. That alone caused a delicious stretch and you knew it would be a slow process getting him to fit comfortably.

“Yes, Daddy,” your hands wrapped around his neck and he growled as he pulled you into a rough kiss.

“Good fuckin girl.” 

He helped lower you onto his cock with lots of kisses, praises, and gentle squeezes. When you got closer to his base, the pain was too much for a moment. Kirishima used his thumb to rub circles into your clit, shushing you sweetly against your parted mouth. 

“Are you okay, baby?” He brushes your hair off your sweaty forehead with his free hand while his other is still working your clit over.

“Yes, Daddy,” you whisper, “You fill me up so well. I love your massive cock filling me up.”

“You’re gonna make me crazy, you know that? Huh?” He pulls your lower lip into his mouth and sucks. You both sit for a while, exchanging kisses and whispers while you adjust to his girth.

“Are you ready to move now, sweet girl?” 

“Yes, Daddy…” he helps you move, dragging your hips up and down his shaft.

After a few deep thrusts, you both increase your pace, matching each other’s movements. It’s not long before your head is thrown back, tears escaping the corners of your eyes. Loud moans and curses escape your mouth as one nipple is pulled into Kirishima’s mouth.

“Oh, Daddy! Fuck, fuck! Right there, right there… I… I’m… AHH!” Before you can even say anything, you’ve come undone, spasming around his cock. 

“Oh, good girl, good fuckin girl,” you go limp and bury your face into his neck while he slams your hips onto his, chasing his release. The feeling of him using your body to get off makes you dizzy with joy. You lean into his ear whispering, “Please come inside me. Wanna feel you come inside me, Daddy… please, need your come inside me, Daddy.” 

Your slurred pleas against his ear send him over the edge into a mind-numbing orgasm. As he comes down from his high and looks into your face full of adoration, he knows he’s caught… hook, line, and sinker. 

*****

The rest of the evening is spent eating cookies on your couch, drinking cider, and watching your favorite crime drama. The sweet kisses and touches sprinkled throughout the night feel so natural… Like you’ve been together for years instead of hours. 

You end up with Kirishima’s head in your lap, running your fingers through his hair as he closes his eyes and relaxes into your touch. The clock on your wall reads 12:30 am and it dawns on you what day it officially is.

“Eji?”

“Hmm?” He opens one eye and reaches up to scratch your scalp. 

“Will you be my valentine?” You bite your bottom lip to stifle a silly grin.

He sits up and pulls you into a bear hug. 

“What kinda silly question is that? Of course. I don’t ever want another valentine besides you.”

Your heart explodes and you kiss him, grabbing his cheeks in both hands. 

“Sixteen-year-old me is absolutely losing her shit right now,” you giggle, rubbing his nose with yours.

“Well,” he grabs your ass and raises an eyebrow, “Forty-two-year-old me is losing his shit right now over finding such a sweet girl with such a sweet ass on her,” he nips at your neck and you squeal.

“Ooh, you ready for another round, old man?”

He growls and throws you over his shoulder. A swift spank to your ass causes you to burst into a fit of laughter. 

“Oh, so I’m dealing with a brat now? You want me to show you what this old man does to little brats?” He squeezes your thighs as he makes his way to the bedroom. 

“But I’m your good girl! Remember?!”

“Yeah, yeah… We’ll see about that.”

[ddaengtae]

see you around || jjk

pairing: jeon jungkook x reader

genre: college, strangers (idiots) to lovers, fitness instructor! jungkook, fluff, smut

word count: 13.9k

summary: you know those beautiful strangers that you admire from afar and obsess over with your friends, but know there’s about a one percent chance they’ll ever talk to you or even know who you are?  that’s precisely what jeon jungkook was to you; a piece of delicious eye candy that you could daydream about all you wanted, but had to accept that it was too unrealistic to ever happen.  or so you thought.  after an embarrassing accident at the gym that makes your worlds collide, maybe you had been wrong about your chances all along.

a/n: when i came up with this idea in my head, i guessed it would be around 5k words.  guess my hands slipped.  this is only my second bts fic, but after getting good feedback for my first one, i decided to give it another try and this is what happened.  i tried to edit closely, but there may be a few types so i’m sorry!  thanks for reading & pls lmk what you think. :)

Another week, another million reasons to be stressed.  It really seemed like that was the never-ending pattern of the college lifestyle.  The weekend was never long enough to truly allow yourself to unwind.  Sure, those two days were great, but how was two days enough to destress from the agony of multiple all-nighters to keep up with the shitload of work that all of your professors always deemed it acceptable to assign?  There was no way for you to prove it, but you believed in a conspiracy theory that all of the professors would meet up at the beginning of each semester and choose to make all of their huge assignments due on the same days just to fuck all of their students over.  There could be no other explanation for the hell that was midterms season.

While during your first two years of college you would barely be hanging on by a thread during the busiest weeks of the semester, you were now a junior and had at last adopted a regime that helped you burn off some steam when the tension became all too much.  Somewhere along the way, you started to realize that inhaling mozzarella sticks and Red Bull at two in the morning the night before an exam did very little to make you feel better and that it would probably be a better idea to take up a healthy lifestyle and better time management skills sooner rather than later.  In the process of getting your life together, one Tuesday evening in the spring of your sophomore year, one of your roommates had convinced you to accompany her to a group fitness class at the gym on campus.  To your surprise, you fell in love with it and the feeling of adrenaline and accomplishment that came along with making it through the hour.  From that day on, you vowed to yourself to make it to the gym most days of the week.

There was something about group fitness classes that made you feel much more comfortable than going to the gym and working out on your own.  Perhaps most glaringly, the classes were dominated with like-minded girls who just wanted some peace of mind for an hour.  Most of the instructors were girls too, except for a few guys who seemed to understand why a lot of women chose to avoid the rest of the gym.  It was quite unsettling to work out by yourself on the main floor and be surrounded by conceited guys who always seemed to either be undressing you with their eyes or judging you because, god forbid, you couldn’t squat three-hundred pounds like they could.  The whole place just always reeked of toxic masculinity, or so that was what you had thought until you found out about the group fitness classes that the facility also held.  They seemed to be a sort of heavenly escape from the rest of the place that resembled a fraternity initiation ceremony.

That was precisely where you found yourself this Monday evening.  In dire need of a break from studying, you found yourself sitting on the floor of the group classroom surrounded by your equipment and waiting for your favorite instructor to arrive.  The concept of a high-intensity circuit training class had initially terrified you when you first decided to try it out last semester, but it had quickly become your favorite class and one that you attended every week without fail.  It was incredibly satisfying to track your progress and watch your body evolve as you adapted to be able to lift heavier weights and make it through the cardio outbreaks without feeling like you were going to drop dead every second.

Taking a long sip of your water, your eyes remained down on your phone as you heard the door of the room open and close again.  As it was still ten minutes before class, you didn’t think much of it and assumed it was probably just more people piling into the room and rushing to get their equipment ready.

“Uh, hi guys!  The usual instructor for the class is unfortunately sick so I’m filling in for her tonight,” an unfamiliar-- but yet also eerily recognizable-- male voice echoed through the room.  “I was just recently certified so this is actually the first class I’ll be teaching here.  I promise I’ll try to live up to her hype.”  The unknown source let out an awkward laugh, which was met with relative silence from the rest of the room.

The moment your eyes moved up to fall upon the new instructor, your breath hitched in your throat, causing the water you had been attempting to drink to flow down the wrong pipe.  This wasn’t just any unmemorable college boy filling in to instruct the class.  There at the front of the room stood none other than Jeon Jungkook.  The breathtaking Jeon Jungkook was going to be leading the class and you were supposed to be able perform-- let alone breathe-- properly?  Oh no.

You and Jungkook were not friends by any means.  Hell, it was highly likely that the boy didn’t even know who you were.  You know those beautiful strangers that you admire from afar, yet know there’s about a one percent chance that they will ever know who you are or ever speak to you?  The ones you tell all of your friends about and you go out of your way to use your FBI-level stalking skills to find their social media in hopes of finding out more about them so you can daydream about your nonexistent, fantasy future together?  The ones you’re always hoping you’ll cross paths with while walking to class because even a glance of them will make your day a little more exciting and give you something to talk about with your friends?  That was what Jungkook was to you.

Jungkook had become known as ‘hot coffee shop boy’ amongst your friend group after you had noticed him studying in the same coffee shop as you one day in the fall of your sophomore year.  As you always chose to study at the least favorite and therefore least populated coffee shop on campus, it was shocking the first time someone as beautiful as Jungkook sat down at one of the tables across from yours and settled in to do his homework as well.  His presence offered you a paradox; while seeing him looking like a model wearing his oversized clothes and sighing at his laptop screen was certainly a distraction at times, it also served as a form of motivation to force you to focus because you didn’t want him thinking you were slacking off.  He seemed to enjoy the quiet ambience of the specific shop because after that first day, he began to frequent it almost as often as you, always sitting at the same table by the third window.  On some occasions, one of his friends who always seemed to be changing hair colors would accompany him.  After some research completed by your enamored friend Jennie who sometimes accompanied you, she discovered his name was Park Jimin.  He quickly became known as ‘iced chai’ after that seemed to be his regular coffee order.

It was an exciting day amongst your friends on the first day of classes in the spring of your sophomore year when Jungkook happened to enroll in the same Earth Science lecture as you to satisfy the science gen-ed requirement at your university.  Rocks and rivers weren’t exactly interesting, but the back of Jungkook’s head from the row in front of you certainly was.  The group chat really blew up the day he spun around in his chair and asked you if he could borrow a pen.  They were right that it would’ve been easier for him to just ask one of the people next to him, but you were smart enough to not think into it too much.  Maybe you just seemed like the type of person to carry around an abundance of stationery materials (you weren’t, and you ended up not taking any notes that day after giving him the only pen you had).

So here you were, practically choking on your water as Jungkook started to set up his own equipment at the front of the room.  How dare he invade your safe space?  You suddenly felt as if you barely remembered how to do a jumping jack, let alone have the facilities to pick up a weight.  

After organizing his weights at the front of the room, Jungkook’s eyes began to scan the participants in the room, likely counting how many people had shown up.  The moment his eyes met yours, your whole body froze in place.  Oddly enough, his seemed to do the same.  His doe eyes became wide and his mouth fell into an ‘o’ as he looked at you for a few seconds too long, and you swore there was an expression of recognition on his face.  Before you could convince yourself that anything of the sort had truly happened, Jungkook was blinking rapidly and shaking his head at himself before his eyes darted away to scan and count the rest of the room.

“Alright everyone, we’re going to get started in a minute here,” Jungkook announced a minute later, looking down at his phone as he connected his music and began blasting it through the speakers.  “Just remember to follow my lead and please don’t hesitate to wave me over if you have any questions or are struggling with form.  I’ll try to keep an eye on all of you and come over to help you out anyway.”  His eyes crinkled into crescent moons as he offered the class a big bunny smile.  Oh god, you were going to pass out.  “We’re going to be starting with a pretty intense cardio circuit here to bring those heart rates right up and set the tone for the rest of class.”  Great.  Your heart rate was already accelerating through the roof just at the sight of him.  “Try to keep up, but if you need to grab some water or take a break at any point, please don’t hesitate to do so.  We’re going to get started in 3… 2… 1… Go!”

To your surprise, you were able to make it through the first couple of circuits without too much trouble.  You made it your mission to zone in on each of the exercises you were doing, and that every time you were forced to face forward you would fixate your gaze on the back of the girl in front of you.  It was shockingly easy to forget about the beautiful man in front of the room while you were gasping for breath after numerous rounds of burpees and mountain climbers.  The goal was to look calm and fit without calling attention to yourself.  Outside of your heavy breathing that was likely being drowned out by Jungkook’s loud music, you could say you were succeeding.

About twenty minutes into the class, Jungkook signaled a transition into an upper body circuit.  While you were delighted to get a break from cardio and to allow your heart rate to calm down for a bit, following the exercises now required you to face forward and watch for his cues.  This would be fine as long as you didn’t focus on his gorgeous face that was currently glistening with sweat in the most pleasing way possible, right?

“Alright, we’re going to start off here with some overhead shoulder presses for the first minute.  I’d recommend something on the lighter side, but make sure you’re challenging yourself.”  With a slight nod of his head, Jungkook picked up his own weights and counted down the class to begin the first exercise of the circuit.

Shoulder presses weren’t bad.  You could do this.  Inhaling a deep breath, you made an attempt to wipe your sweaty palms off on your leggings before picking up your dumbbells and getting in position to begin your shoulder presses.  After the first few reps, you quickly fell into a rhythm that was both comfortable yet challenging, feeling that delicious burn in your shoulder muscles.  At the halfway mark through the minute, your eyes had remained glued to the same girl in front of you.  You finally felt a sense of peace.  One look at Jungkook couldn’t hurt, right?

Wrong.  

Against your better judgement, you decided to shift your eyes to the front of the room and take a good luck at a combination of both Jungkook’s back and the reflection of the front of his body through the mirror before him.  

The string of events that occurred immediately after that moment was a blur.  As Jungkook pressed his set of dumbbells above his head, his baggy shirt slid up his body, exposing his sweaty, toned abs that looked as though they were sculpted by the gods themselves.  What was likely an audible gasp escaped from your lips as your eyes remained frozen on the sight in front of you.  It was unclear if it was your mesmerized state, your sweaty hands, or a combination of both, but seconds later, the dumbbell in your right hand slipped out of your grasp and quickly went crashing downward.

“Oh my... Fuck!” 

There was a moment of dissociation before you realized that the loud cry had, in fact, come out of your mouth, and that the dumbbell that had glided out of your hand had, in fact, come crashing down onto the big toe of your right foot.  Your head was spinning as you began to process the throbbing feeling radiating throughout your entire foot, as well as the weight of what had just occurred.  Within moments, the eyes of all of the participants were on you, as well as the eyes of the one person whose attention you really did not want in such an embarrassing moment.  No, no, no.

“Oh my god, are you okay?” Jungkook’s panicked voice echoed throughout the room as he spoke into his headset and he quickly dropped his weights on the ground.  “Um, okay, the rest of you can keep going!  I’m going to get someone else to come in within a few minutes so I can help her.”  Within moments, he was shoving his way through the room until he was right in front of you and pulling the microphone away from his mouth so the rest of the class wouldn’t hear your interaction.  “Are you alright?  Oh my god, you shouldn’t be putting pressure on it.  Let’s get you out of here and get some ice.”

You genuinely thought you were going to pass out.  It had little to do with your toe, and a whole lot to do with Jungkook’s sudden closeness.  His concerned face was just inches away from yours as his eyes scanned yours for any sort of explanation for what had just unfolded.  His presence was intoxicating.  You could smell the combination of his cologne and sweat, and you had yet to tear the image of his gleaming six-pack out of your mind.  Oh my god.  That had really just happened.  The first impression you made on Jungkook, AKA hot coffee shop boy, was you making an absolute fool out of yourself and possibly breaking your toe while doing a simple exercise.  You were never going to live this one down.  You were going to throw up.

When you hadn’t responded to Jungkook within a few seconds, he took it upon himself to drape an arm over your shoulders and pull your body against his side.  “Here, lean against me so you’re not putting weight on it.  I’m going to bring you to the first-aid room and get you some ice…  At the very least.”

It was quite possible that your brain had chosen it was better to black out the memory as Jungkook began to pull you out of the room, yelling to one of the workers at the front desk to quickly find someone else to take over the class.  Your legs felt like jelly as they moved beside his, only functioning out of muscle memory rather than true volition.  Here you were, body pressed against that of the guy you had admired from afar for over a year.  In any other circumstance, this would have been like a dream come true.  Instead, you wished the ground would swallow you up and put you out of your misery.

It wasn’t long until you were pulled into what was likely the first-aid room and instructed to sit on top of the counter by a very stressed Jungkook.  The more you thought about it, the more horrible you felt.  Not only was this the Jeon Jungkook of your fantasies, but it was also the Jeon Jungkook who had informed the class before it had started that this was the first class he had ever led.  You had quite literally ruined his first class, and had set an appalling example of what he would expect going forward.  If your toe hadn’t been throbbing, you would have seriously considered running right out the door.

“Okay, if you don’t mind, just take off your shoe and sock while I try to find an ice pack,” Jungkook commanded as he nervously raked a hand through his already-messy hair, frantically rifling through the cabinets.  Your eyes watched his back as you followed his instructions, guilt filling your entire body.  He seemed stressed.  Nervous, even.  It made sense, if you thought about it.  Your foolish accident had just become his responsibility, and he was a new employee.  You would be nervous too.

“Found one,” he breathed out, hitting it against the counter a couple of times to activate the coldness.  As he turned around to face you, his eyes wandered down to your exposed toe.  “Oh no, that looks pretty swollen.  Does it hurt really badly?  Are you okay?”

“It doesn’t feel great, but I’m okay.”  No, no you were not okay, but you needed this to be over.  Meeting his eyes, you realized those were the first words you had spoken to him since this whole debacle had unraveled.  He probably thought you were crazy.  Taking the ice pack from him, you chewed on your lower lip.  “I’m… I’m really sorry.”

Jungkook furrowed his brow as he looked up from your foot to meet your gaze, tilting his head to the side.  “Huh?  You have no reason to be sorry.  Accidents happen.  I get it… I’m pretty clumsy too sometimes and have hurt myself much worse than this for much stupider reasons.  Really, don’t worry.”  He was rambling, and if you hadn’t been so distraught, you would have perhaps realized just how nervous he really seemed.  Offering you a shy smile, his eyes averted away from yours as his cheeks flushed a shade of bright red.  Redder than they should have been from just working out.

Looking down at your foot, you placed the ice pack on top of it and shook your head.  It was difficult to form words with him so close, but you knew you had to if you wanted to redeem yourself at all.  You already had created a mental plan to avoid him at all costs and hide from him whenever that wasn’t possible, but this was the least you could do.  “No, I’m really sorry.  You said at the beginning that this was your first class and I… I kind of ruined it for you.  I’m sure you were really excited about it.”

Jungkook remained occupied with your toe as he moved the ice pack to the side, feeling around the bones and moving it gently in various directions to see how bad the pain was.  “I don’t think it’s broken.  Definitely pretty swollen, but not broken.  However, I’m clearly not a doctor so you might want to get a second opinion.”  Standing up straight, he offered you a warm smile.  “But seriously, don’t worry about it.  There’s always going to be more classes for me to teach and I wasn’t just going to let you suffer there.  I’m happy to help.”

God, not only was he gorgeous, but he was also this friendly?  It was possible that he was just being nice to keep you calm and keep his job, but regardless, he just seemed so perfect.  So perfect that you feared being so close to him, for your endless flaws felt as if though they were being magnified.  Clearing your throat, you forced yourself to return the smile.  “Thanks.  I really appreciate it, but I’ll be fine.”  You needed to escape.  You needed to get out of there so you could cry to your friends about just how mortified you were and how you now really never stood a chance with hot coffee shop boy.  “I should probably get going.  Don’t want to hold you up any longer.”

“You’re not holding me up at all, I promise,” Jungkook responded a bit too quickly, but yet again, you were too focused on your own embarrassment to notice.  Crossing his arms over his chest, the tall man tilted his head to the side.  “How are you going to get back to your dorm?  Do you have a ride?  You definitely shouldn’t be walking on your toe.”

Fuck.  He had a good point.  Regardless of the pain flowing through your foot, you were willing to walk on it just to escape this situation.  However, you knew you couldn’t tell him that.  “I, uh, one of my roommates has a car and I was going to call her to pick me up.”

“I have my car here.  I could drive you.”

Wait, what?  Had he really just offered you a ride?  If you had met his gaze, you would’ve seen that he looked just as surprised that such an offer had slipped out of his lips so casually.  Instead, you stared down at your lap as you attempted to process his suggestion.  If the situation had been even slightly less humiliating, a car ride with the Jeon Jungkook would have sounded like one of your fantasies come to life.  However, at the current moment all you could imagine was the intense awkward silence that would likely fill the car as you contemplated how to successfully fling yourself out of the window.  That would not do right now.  You were not in the right headspace to muster up any coherent form of small talk.  The offer was likely just extended out of pity anyway.  He was a good guy and deemed that that would be the righteous thing to do.  No need to burden him and actually make him follow through with it.

“No, no.  I wouldn’t make you do that.  I’m going to text my friend right now,” you assured him, weakly smiling as you moved the ice pack to the side to retrieve your removed sock and shoe.  “You have a workout to finish anyway.

“It wouldn’t be any trouble,” Jungkook insisted, watching intently as you carefully put your sneaker back on and tied it up at lightning speed.  When he realized you had no plans of speaking again, a defeated sigh pressed through his lips.  Why was he so set on helping you?  “Okay, okay.  As long as your friend is coming soon, that’ll work.  I can walk you to the lobby though.”

Realizing he wasn’t going to let you just run out of the room alone, you forced yourself to nod your head in agreement.  You were being dramatic.  You could handle one more minute in his presence before you imploded.  “Sure, thanks.”  The response came off a bit snappier than you had intended, but did that really matter at this point?  You weren’t going to be able to show your face around him ever again to begin with.

Once you pushed yourself off of the counter, Jungkook encouraged you to lean most of your weight against him as he led you out the door.  As you were already on the first floor of the facility, the walk to the lobby luckily didn’t take too long.  Upon arrival, you plopped down in one of the plush chairs by the door, fishing your phone out of the pocket of your hoodie and pretending to draft a text.  In all honesty, the moment Jungkook disappeared, you intended to wobble your way back to your dorm by twisting your foot to the side to avoid putting pressure on the big toe.  You were well aware that you were going to look ridiculous, but nothing could be more mortifying than what you had already experienced.

Jungkook stood over your chair, rubbing the back of his neck as he rocked from side to side on his feet.  Something about him just exuded nervous energy, and it was making you feel even more on edge.  “You’re sure your friend is able to come soon, right?”

Nodding your head in response, you lifted your hand into a thumbs-up that you regretted the second your hand formed it.  God, you might as well have hit him with some finger guns.  Could you be any cringier?  “Yes, don’t worry.  She’s on her way.  Really, thank you though.”

Shoving his hands into the pockets of his athletic shorts, Jungkook’s eyes scanned your face one last time.  It was almost as if he was searching for any hint of a lie, but if he had been, he wasn’t able to find it.  “Okay, okay… If you insist.  I’m sorry this had to happen to you.  I hope it heals quickly.”  His lips stretched into that signature bunny smile you had witnessed so many times while seeing him with his friends in public, but it almost looked a little more… Bashful.  “I’ll see you around, okay?”

No, no he would not.  You weren’t even sure that he had recognized you from being at the same coffee shop so often, but regardless, you had already planned to avoid the location at all costs.  You couldn’t stand the thought of him possibly approaching you out of pity to check and see if you were okay.

Instead of expressing any of these concerns, you twisted your lips into a small smile and nodded your head at him.  “Mhmm.  See you around.”

After lifting his hand in a wave, Jungkook smiled at you once more before turning on his heel and slowly starting to make his way back toward the main area of the gym.  You watched as he began to disappear, as you planned on rushing out the door the moment he was out of sight.  Right before he rounded the corner, his body twisted to face you once more.  If you hadn’t been so fixated on your own embarrassment, maybe you would’ve noticed the way his cheeks flushed a deep shade of red before he nervously laughed to himself and rounded the corner quickly so he was out of your line of vision.

The moment he disappeared, you gathered your belongings and rose to your feet a bit too quickly, immediately noticing how you forgot to avoid putting pressure on your toe.  Fighting through the pain and fighting to maintain any sense of pride you had left, you began your walk-- or rather, wobble-- home.

God, you needed some wine.

The rest of the week passed by without much trouble, but maybe that was due to your advanced avoiding skills.  Due to having three midterms throughout the week, most of your time was spent holed up alone studying.  While you usually would do most of your studying in your favorite quiet coffee shop, you made it a point to steer clear of it at all costs.  You were well aware that Jungkook also spent a lot of his time in that specific location, and you weren’t ready to show your face to him if it could be prevented.  He had been right; your toe wasn’t broken, but instead just badly bruised.  While your toe may have been fine, your ego certainly wasn’t.  After stumbling home after the incident on that Monday evening, your roommates had a laughing fest at your expense over a few too many bottles of wine.  They attempted to convince you that what had happened really wasn’t that embarrassing, that Jungkook seemed to be really sweet about it, and that such a chaotic event would be ‘the most epic story to tell people about the start of your relationship at your wedding.’  Although you indulged in their pipe dreams for the time being, you were going to stick to your plan: avoid Jungkook at all times possible until enough time had passed that he likely forgot about your humiliating catastrophe.

After a week of cramming for exams and perfecting your evading abilities, you were beyond ready to take a night to unwind and destress. That was precisely why you found yourself out at one of popular college bars by your campus with your friend Jennie on Friday night.  The pair of you weren’t exactly the type to go out and let loose very often as you tried your best to prioritize your studies, but once you allowed yourself to get dressed up and had a few vodka-crans running through your veins, you understood why a lot of college students went out so often and remembered why you used to so much during your freshman year.  The sensation of being tipsy and laughing with your friends was truly therapeutic and a much-needed antidote to counteract the toxic environment of never-ending stress.

Having been at the bar for over an hour, it started to get quite crowded.  As you twirled your straw around in your half-empty drink, you watched as Jennie began to look around at all of the new faces in the bar before freezing and pursing her lips. “Okay, not to make you freak out or anything… But hot coffee shop boy AKA sexy fitness instructor boy AKA Jeon Jungkook is here,” she whisper-yelled at you as she leaned toward your ear.  “He seems drunk… Like really drunk.”

Blinking rapidly as you tried to process this new information, you pulled back from her and began to shake your head.  This certainly was not what you needed to hear right now, but the alcohol in your system calmed you down at least a little bit so you didn’t immediately book it out of the place.  “So what you’re telling me is that I need to hide in the bathroom for the rest of the night?”  Despite your fears, you really wanted to get a glance of him.  Although the bar was quite large, you told yourself it would be too risky.  If experience had taught you anything, it was that even one glance at him could be fatal for you.

“Stop being ridiculous,” Jennie scoffed, shoving your shoulder before taking a long sip of her drink.  Her gaze remained set on the area of the crowded bar that you refused to look toward.  “He’s…” She paused for a moment before her eyes widened.  “Okay, I might be a little drunk, but I’m almost positive he keeps looking over here.”

“Maybe because you’re staring at him and drawing attention to us,” you scolded, narrowing your eyes at her.  “Please stop before I jump over the actual bar and hide behind it.”

Jennie laughed at your dramatic suggestion, eyeing your nervous persona up and down.  “Relax, relax.”  She looked over your shoulder yet again.  “Oh, wait.  He’s on the move now so I don’t think you have to worry.”

Letting out a sigh of relief, you took an extra long sip of your drink.  “Thank god.  I don’t need to relive my earlier trauma on a night out.”

“Wait, fuck.  I think--”

“Ah, is that toe girl?!”

Your whole body froze as you heard the close proximity of a very familiar male voice behind you.  You wanted to believe that your initial guess of what was occurring wasn’t true, but the mixture of shock and amusement on Jennie’s face as she looked over your shoulder at the sight behind you confirmed that your worst nightmare was, in fact, true.

Sucking in a deep breath and downing the rest of your drink before placing it down on the bar, you gave yourself a mental pep talk before slowly turning on your heel to face the source of the voice.  If there hadn’t been a decent amount of alcohol in your system, you were quite certain that you would’ve passed out right then and there.

There before you stood Jungkook with a cheeky grin spread across his lips and arms crossed over his chest as he stared down at, unfortunately, you.  He was sporting a pair of tight, ripped black jeans and a matching black t-shirt.  The clasping of a beer bottle in one hand and the way his arms were folded made his bicep muscles protrude in a manner that had you ready to start drooling.  Jennie had been right; his face was glowing a bright shade of red, likely due to a great deal of alcohol consumption.

Clearing your throat, you forced your lips into a shy smile as you folded your hands together in front of you.  You wished you hadn’t finished your drink so you had something more natural to do with your hands.  It felt as if though your heart was going to explode through your chest, but he was here now and there was no escaping.  “God, is that really what I’m known as now?”

“I mean, kind of.”  Jungkook let out a loud laugh, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he did so.  How was he so fucking gorgeous?  And why the fuck was this beautiful man going out of his way to talk to you on a night out?  “But I won’t call you that anymore.  It’s Y/N, right?”

Your brow furrowed as your mouth opened in surprise.  Wait, what?  Jungkook knew your name?  It felt like your mind was moving at a million miles a minute trying to process just how that could be possible.

A hand reached out from behind you to squeeze your shoulder, Jennie stepping forward and revealing herself after you had forgotten about her existence for a minute.  Her lips were twisted upward into a mischievous smile.  “I see a couple of my friends from one of my classes.  Gonna go say hi to them.  I’ll meet up with you later.”  After not-so-discreetly wiggling her eyebrows at you, she mouthed what appeared to be “good luck” before sauntering off.

“Looks like you’re stuck with me now.”  Jungkook chuckled quietly as he watched Jennie walk away before setting his eyes back on you and smiling warmly.  You were convinced that his smile was going to be the death of you.  “Hopefully you won’t try to run off as quickly as you did the other day.”

“I did not run off!” you scoffed immediately, crossing your own arms over your chest as you feigned offense.  Once again, thank god for alcohol, for you were well aware that this conversation would not be happening without it.  He was right, but you hadn’t realized he had noticed your urgency in escaping that day.  ‘I… I wasn’t even aware that you knew my name.”

“Suuure you didn’t.  You couldn’t get away from me fast enough,” Jungkook teased, leaning forward a bit to nudge his shoulder against yours.  The area of skin he touched immediately felt like it was on fire, as did your cheeks.  “But of course I know your name.  We had Earth Science together last year and you’re always studying at the same coffee shop by North campus that I do.  You’re kind of hard to miss.”

You?  Hard to miss?  Not to mention, the Earth Science class was a lecture with over one hundred students in it, and the professor hardly ever took any form of attendance.  Sure you could say the same thing about you knowing his name, but that was only because you had gone out of your way to find out who he was after becoming captivated by him upon seeing him at the coffee shop.  This didn’t make any sense.  Were you dreaming?  Hallucinating?

Raising an eyebrow at him, you decided to keep your response simple.  “You’ve never talked to me, though…”

“I know, I know.”  Jungkook unfolded his arms and clasped both of his hands around his beer bottle, staring down at his fingers as he tapped them against the glass.  Maybe it was the dim lighting in the bar, but you could’ve sworn his cheeks darkened as he avoided your eyes.  The aroma of cologne and beer coming off of him at the close proximity had you feeling light-headed.  “I’ve always wanted to.  Planned to talk to you at the coffee shop this week, but you were nowhere to be seen.  You just… I… You’re really pretty and you’re always smiling and I kind of freaked out when I saw you taking that class on Monday.  I’m pretty shy and not exactly the most confident person so I have no idea why I’m saying this right now… Definitely all of the beer I’ve drank… But I probably shouldn’t be overstepping or saying any of this anyway since I’m starting to realize that you’ve probably been avoiding me or think I’m weird or something.  Sorry for offering to drive you home the other day… I realized after that that probably seemed creepy coming from a total stranger.”  He looked to the side as he began to nervously tap his foot against the floor.  Something that sounded like a nervous laugh pressed through his lips.  “Fuck.  This is why I barely ever drink.”

Your body remained frozen as you stared at the side of his face, fully aware of the fact that your jaw had dropped and you were visibly gaping at him.  No.  There was absolutely no way that those words came out of his mouth and he meant them.  It had to be the excessive amount of alcohol in his system, right?  Or maybe he was just sweet talking you to try to get laid.  That had to be it, right?  You weren’t sure if you were going to throw up, pass out, or do both at the same time.  The vodka taking over your own system was preventing you from being able to form any sort of coherent thought.  Still, he deserved a response.

“What?  I don’t think you’re weird at all,” you reassured, chewing on your lower lip as you tried to read the expression on his face.  God, you really could have come up with something better than that.

Jungkook’s doe eyes at last met yours again, a disbelieving look in his eyes.  “Then why’d you lie and say your friend was picking you up and end up walking home on a possibly broken toe instead of letting me drive you home?”

Oh my god, he had seen you do that?  You were certain he was completely out of sight when you had dragged yourself out of the building.  To be fair, you hadn’t taken into account the fact that the place was covered with windows that would have given anyone access to see outside the front of the building, but why would he have been looking anyway?  Just as you thought that day couldn’t have gotten any more embarrassing, it did.  

The mix of alcohol in your system and your heart pounding in your chest was quickly becoming too much to handle and making you lose control over your faculties.  Maybe that was why you blurted out, “I-I don't know… You make me nervous.”

“You make me nervous too!”

Before you could even begin to comprehend the weight of his words, another male figure popped up beside Jungkook and draped an arm over his shoulders.  His bright pink hair made him easily identifiable.  It was iced chai, also known as Park Jimin.  If Jennie had noticed he was there, she certainly would have been freaking out.

“There you are!  I’ve been looking for you.  You just disappeared on me,” Jimin informed Jungkook, his gaze quickly moving to set on your distraught form.  If you hadn’t been so out of sorts, perhaps you would’ve noticed the look of recognition in his eyes as they set on you.  “I’m sorry, is he bothering you?  He never usually goes out with us and gets drunk like this, so I’m sorry if he’s a little chaotic.”

Shaking your head at Jimin, you offered him a comforting smiling.  You could feel Jungkook’s concerned eyes burning a hole into the side of your face.  “No, no.  He’s not bothering me at all, don’t worry.”

“Oh, thank god.  I was worried he might do something stupid.”  Jimin let out a sigh of relief, looking between the pair of you.  Could that ‘something stupid’ be what had just occurred?  At last, he gave Jungkook a firm pat on the shoulder.  “We have to get going right now.  Hoseok thought it’d be a good idea to down five tequila shots in a row after all of the beer we drank back at the dorm.  He has his head down on the bar with his eyes closed and I want to get him out of here before he starts puking everywhere.  Afraid you might end up in the same state if you keep drinking at this pace too, dude.”

“I’m fiiine,” Jungkook snapped back at him, rolling his eyes as he shrugged Jimin’s arm off of his shoulder.  He peered at you for a quick second before his eyes averted downward, the nerves that had been there before refusing to go away.  After taking a few moments to ponder what his friend had just told him, he let out a defeated sigh.  “Fine.  We can go.  Only because it’s Hoseok though.”

“I’ve already requested the Uber so we should head outside now,” Jimin urged, glancing over toward where Hoseok likely was sitting at the bar.

“Um.” Jungkook at last forced himself to look at you, his lips curving upward into the slightest smile.  It seemed forced though, and you knew it was because you didn’t have the opportunity to elaborate on and finish the conversation you were having before Jimin butted in.  You also felt as if though you were about to self-implode and needed some time to comprehend what had just unfolded.  “Sorry.  I have to get going, I guess.  I’ll see you around though, okay?”

Nodding your head in agreement, you allowed yourself to return a reassuring smile.  “Okay.  I’ll see you around.”  This time, it was possible that you meant it.

After he gave you one last anxious look, he turned on his heel and followed Jimin’s lead, disappearing out of your sight.

Where the fuck was Jennie?

After scoping out Jennie in the corner of the bar, you had convinced her that it was absolutely necessary to immediately take an Uber home to debrief on what had occurred.  Within half an hour, you had managed to arrive back safely to your dorm and had replaced your uncomfortable clothes with pajamas and your vodka crans with a bottle of wine.  Although your mind felt quite foggy from trying to piece together everything that Jungkook had said, you were able to provide Jennie with at least the majority of the details.

“Wait, hold on.  Let me think about this.”  Jennie threw herself back against your bed, staring up at the ceiling after her head hit the pillows.  “So basically what you’re telling me is that you are to Jungkook what Jungkook is to you?  Like he pretty much admitted to admiring you from afar and being too afraid to talk to you all of this time?” she questioned, eyes wide in amazement.  “God damn, why can’t shit like this happen to me?  This is like some fairytale shit.  You’re so fucking lucky.”

Taking a big swig directly out of the bottle of cheap rosé, you let out an exasperated sigh.  “I don’t know.  It seems too good to be true.  Like, what if he was just really drunk and didn’t know what he was saying?  You even said he seemed really drunk.  Or like, what if he was just being nice because he was trying to get laid?”

“Y/N, don’t be ridiculous.  I know this all seems so unreal because we never thought something like this was possible, but the things he said to you were way too specific to just be a fluke.” Jennie sat up straight again and pulled the bottle of wine out of your hands, taking a sip herself.  “Besides, I was watching you guys from across the bar.  He looked absolutely smitten with you and ridiculously nervous, drunk or not.”

“Fuck, I’m so much better at just daydreaming about guys than actually knowing how to talk to them and attempting to form actual relationships,” you groaned out, closing your eyes and resting your head on Jennie’s shoulder.  “What am I supposed to do?”

“I hate to break it to you since I know this is very out of character for you, but you’re going to have to make the next move.  He laid his cards on the table, and now the ball is in your court.”  Jennie allowed her head to fall on top of yours and passed the bottle of wine back to you.  “Based on what you explained to me, you didn’t really provide him with a whole lot of reassurance that the feeling was mutual and he’s probably feeling super embarrassed right now… Like, definitely more embarrassed than you felt after the whole gym incident.  You have to let him know that you’re interested in him too.”

Letting out a huff, you tapped your fingers against the glass of the bottle of wine.  Jennie did have a valid point, as much as you hated to admit it.  Regardless of Jungkook’s intentions and just how drunk he may have been, he had seemed incredibly flustered after rambling on and exposing what he had to you.  As much as there was still a part of you that was convinced that he hadn’t meant what he said, there was a bigger part of you that was excited about what this could possibly lead to if you followed through with it.  You would have to throw away your nerves and muster up the tiny bit of confidence you had if this was ever going to happen.

“Okay, so what’s the game plan?”

The plan you and Jennie had concocted ended up being a lot more difficult to follow through with than you had initially imagined.  The original scheme involved you approaching him at the coffee shop you both always studied at, but despite the numerous occasions you dropped by and spent hours studying there over the next week, he was nowhere to be found.  It was almost as if he had adopted the same avoiding technique you had the week prior after being embarrassed at what unfolded at the gym.  You weren’t exactly surprised, but it was making this whole thing a lot more complicated for you.  Furthermore, the longer it dragged out, the more anxious you got that maybe this was all a bad idea and that you had misunderstood what he said at the bar.

After a week with no luck, Jennie had convinced you that maybe it would be a better idea to try to track him down at the gym.  Despite going almost every day and keeping your eyes peeled for him, he was nowhere to be seen.  It wasn’t until a few days later that it dawned on you that the group fitness class schedule was posted online, and that it was possible that he now had some classes that were officially assigned to him.  Sure enough, upon checking the recreation website, you quickly discovered that he did have a couple classes that he was set to teach.  While this information certainly was helpful, it was quite unfortunate that every class he led happened to be at the ass-crack of dawn.  God, were you really interested in the type of guy who gets up extra early to work out?  Apparently so.

So that was precisely how you found yourself rolling up to the gym at 6:45am on a Tuesday morning, eyes heavy with exhaustion as you searched for the room the class was being held in.  Your heart was pounding and your palm was sweaty against your water bottle, but you were too dedicated to turn around at this point.  You had spent over a week trying to track him down, and you at last had.

When you entered the room, Jungkook had not arrived yet.  There were already quite a few girls in the room setting up their equipment, so you followed suit.  As most participants were often too intimidated to take the spots up front and center in front of where the instructor stood, you took it upon yourself to do the honors.  Of course you knew this would make Jungkook want to run the other way, but the thrill of making him as nervous as you were that last time was too exciting to turn down.

The door of the room opened and closed once more, and you didn’t even have to look up to feel his presence.  Here we go.  “Hi, everyone!  Welcome to class.  My name is Jungkook and I’ll be your instructor toda--” His voice cut off at the end of his statement, and when you finally allowed your eyes to set on him, he was already looking at you with wide eyes and tinted cheeks.  Within a millisecond, his eyes found the ground and he apprehensively took his spot directly in front of you.  The poor guy didn’t have a choice.  “U-Um, if you guys have any questions before we get started, please don’t hesitate to wave me over!”  You had a very strong feeling he was praying you wouldn’t wave him over.

The plan you had created before arriving was to wait until after class was over to ask him if he could talk for a few minutes.  You knew it wouldn’t be fair to put him on the spot before class, and you didn’t exactly feel comfortable confessing your feelings for him in front of twenty other girls who were probably drooling over him as well either.  

You managed to follow through with the plan, not communicating with Jungkook at all before and throughout the class except for a few soft smiles and some attempted eye contact.  The eye contact thing didn’t go over so well though, for whenever you did manage to get Jungkook to lock eyes with you, he’d immediately turn bright red and force himself to look everywhere but at you.  His nervous stammering through the microphone when giving instructions was almost too cute to handle.

When the class finally did come to an end and you were a sweaty mess, you sucked in a deep breath as you watched the rest of the participants start to put away their equipment.  Setting your eyes on Jungkook, you smiled slightly.  “Hey, can we talk?”

Jungkook looked up from his phone, eyes wide and clearly panicked.  He scanned your face carefully, almost as if he was trying to guess what your intentions were.  At last, he swallowed the lump in his throat and shoved his phone into his pocket.  “U-Um, sure, I guess.  Let’s just wait until everyone clears out.”

Nodding in agreement, you sat back and watched as the rest of the participants put their materials back in the closet and slowly began to file out of the room.  With each person that left, you could sense Jungkook getting more and more anxious.  He seemed to be mindlessly checking things around the room, his eyes darting back and forth between the door and any part of you that wasn’t your eyes.  By the time the last girl exited, your heart was pounding in your chest as well.

Clearing your throat, you watched as Jungkook walked to the front of the room to shut the door, seeming to take as long as humanly possible to pull it closed.  Just as you were about to speak the pitch you had practiced in your head and to Jennie numerous times over the past week, he opened his mouth.

“Look, I’m not sure exactly what’s going on here and I know that I might have been a bit overbearing when I was drunk last week, but if you’re just here to make me nervous and make fun of me and my awkward self for having a crush on you, you can just leave.”  He at last whipped around to face you, a sad expression taking over his features as he began to pace back and forth, running a hand through his sweaty hair.  He resembled something like a wounded puppy, and the longer you stared at him, the more you noticed just how exhausted and agitated he looked.

That definitely was not what you had expected and you felt awful that he had spent over a week thinking that you were probably teasing him with your friends for what he had said to you at the bar.  Furrowing your brow, you pushed yourself up to your feet and crossed your arms over your chest.  The planned speech was not going to do in these circumstances.  You would have to cut straight to point.

“I dropped that weight on my foot because I’ve been ridiculously attracted to you for over a year and got embarrassingly flustered at the sight of your shirt riding up during class.”

Jungkook stopped dead in his tracks, clasping both of his hands behind his head as he at last allowed himself to look at you.  His eyes were wide in shock, his head tilted just slightly to the left.  “Wait, what?”

“I didn’t want you to drive me home because I was already so embarrassed and was so nervous that I would’ve only embarrassed myself more trying to talk to you without making a complete fool out of myself.”

As you spoke again, Jungkook hesitantly took a couple of steps in your direction.  It seemed as if though his expression was slowly softening, and what almost appeared to be a small smile was fighting to form on the corners of his lips.  “I asked you to borrow a pen that one time in Earth Science with plans to work up the nerve to talk to you at the end of class when I had to give it back, but instead I just kept it and ran out of the room because I got too nervous.”

Unable to hide your own smile now, you allowed yourself to take a step toward him.  The closer you got to each other, the more the tension in the room built.  “I lied and said that I had an extra pen that day, but really I gave you my only one and just didn’t take notes that whole class.”

At last, that familiar bunny smile stretched across Jungkook’s whole face, his chest bubbling in laughter as he threw his head back.  “I once tried to ‘accidentally’ drop a book near you at the coffee shop in hopes that you’d pick it up and talk to me, but instead I just dropped it and tripped over it.”  Another step forward.

Giggling quietly, you chewed on your lower lip as you advanced forward.  “My friends and I have collectively referred to you by the code name ‘hot coffee shop boy’ ever since the first time I saw you there.  Also, ‘sexy gym instructor boy’ since last week.”

Jungkook’s eyes were boring into yours at this point, his body inching forward just slightly as his toes finally bumped against yours.  The tension-- not just from what was happening at the moment, but also from a year of pining after each other-- was so close to bubbling over.  “My friends and I know you as ‘hot coffee shop girl.’  Also, ‘toe girl’ since last week.”  The warm smile on his lips had twisted into a sort of mischievous smirk.

Leaning your head forward the slightest bit, your breath hitched in your throat as you could feel the warmth of his breath against your lips.  “If I haven’t made it clear yet, I’m extremely into you.”

Jungkook’s eyes-- which had darkened quite a bit over the last minute-- flickered down to your lips, his own head leaning forward an inch.  With this movement, the tip of his nose brushed against yours.  “And if I haven’t made it obvious yet, I’m extremely into you too.”

Before you could utter another word, Jungkook closed the minimal space remaining between the two of you by crashing his plump lips into yours.  His hands moved up to cup your cheeks, one moving along the back of your head to tangle into your hair.  Your own hands gripped to the front of his shirt as you stumbled back a bit due to the impact, your back bumping against the mirror in the front of the room.  The tension that had previously been building had popped the moment his lips met yours, but as his fingers tugged on your hair and his tongue found its way between your lips, you felt it resurfacing, this time between your legs.  You felt a bit flustered getting turned on this quickly by him, but when you put it into perspective, you had been waiting for this moment to unravel for over a year.  As your hands slid up the front of his shirt to rest on his defined core, you were certain you could feel his length getting hard against your thigh.

Pulling away after a minute, Jungkook rested his forehead against yours and stared deeply into your eyes as he breathed heavily.  There was a playful smirk on his lips as he dropped the hand from your face and rested it on your hip.  It was nice to see that he had finally let his guard down.  “So, I have to ask.  Are you more for sex first or a fancy date first?  I’m happily offering both, but we’re both kind of coming off a bit impatient here.”

Biting your tongue to hold in your laughter, you couldn’t ignore the way that the heat in the pit of your stomach was quickly sinking down lower between your legs.  “You know, if you hadn’t been so difficult to track down this past week, I may have taken you up on that fancy date first.”  You ghosted your fingers over his stomach, eliciting a surprised jolt out of him.  “But after you made me wait so long, I think you just might have to fuck me first.”

Jungkook’s eyes widened in surprise at your lewd words before he smirked and pressed his body against yours a bit harder, leaning forward to kiss a trail of wet kisses down your jawline.  “I’m happy to be at your service, but we’re kind of out in the open here.  I could drive us back to my room, that is if you’ll actually get in the car with me this time.”

Rolling your eyes at his teasing comment, you shoved at his chest.  Regardless, you couldn’t deny the fact that you were feeling incredibly impatient and weren’t sure you would be able to handle the wait while he transported you across campus.  Chewing on your lower lip, your eyes scanned the room.  “Equipment closet.  It’s spacious enough, it locks, and there’s no windows.”

“Jesus Christ,” Jungkook muttered under his breath, eyes searching your face for any hint of a lie.  When he didn’t find any, he smirked and pulled back, grabbing your hand in his.  “You know, I had planned on doing a lot of things today, but fucking in an equipment closet at the ripe hour of eight in the morning certainly wasn’t one of them.”

“Get used to it, hot coffee shop boy.”  Smirking to yourself, you allowed him to drag you towards the closet, pressing your back against the door after he closed and locked it behind you.  “Are you complaining?”

Rapidly shaking his head, Jungkook leaned forward and peppered kisses along your neck and collarbone, only pulling back to tug your shirt and sports bra over your head.  “No, no.  Just concerned you’re going to be the death of me before I even get started with you.”  Taking a step back, he pulled his own shirt over his head before allowing his eyes to rake up and down your body.  A combination of lust and admiration filled his eyes as he stepped toward you again.  “God, you really are so beautiful.”

Despite the fact that you had both been completely open with each other and the current situation being far from romantic, you felt your cheeks heating up at his compliment.  Shaking your head, you poked him in the stomach.  “Speak for yourself.  That’s the reason why I almost broke my toe.”

Throwing back his head in laughter, Jungkook stepped forward and wrapped his arms around your waist, lifting your body up and placing you down on top of a few stacked crates full of equipment.  “Mmm, I can make it up to you right now.”

Leaning forward, you pressed a few kisses along the corners of his lips and his jaw.  “And how are you going to do that?”

“Shhh, patience.”  Jungkook grinned as he bent down, slowly kissing a trail down your neck and collarbones.  When he reached your breasts, he slowed down his pace, carefully taking one of your nipples between his lips and softly sucking at the skin.  Once he established a rhythm that he was satisfied with, he lifted a hand and latched it around your other breast, kneading the skin between his fingers.

Letting out a soft moan, you threw your head back in pleasure and closed your eyes.  Your hands fastened around his neck, gently tugging at the hair on the back of his head.  The longer his lips and hands worked at your breasts, the more the heat between your legs throbbed.  “How am I supposed to be patient when I’ve waited so long for this?”

Jungkook’s eyes flickered up to meet yours, his lips making a popping noise as he removed them from your breast.  “You make a fair point.”  Kissing down your stomach, he urged you to lift your hips as he tugged your leggings and panties down your legs and allowed them to fall into a pile on the floor.  Kneeling down on the floor, his lips trailed their way up the inside of your thigh.  “Mmm, so wet already and I’ve barely even touched you.”

Whimpering softly at the feeling of his lips so close to where you needed them, you bucked your hips upward in an attempt to feel any sort of friction.  “P-Please.”

Chuckling quietly, Jungkook’s dark eyes remained on yours as he ghosted his lips over your dripping pussy.  The shy, insecure boy that he claimed to be earlier was nowhere to be found.  Instead, he was now indulging in the power he held over you.  “Who made you this wet?  Tell me.”

“You, J-Jungkook.  You did,” you whined out, attempting to push down on the back of his head.

Jungkook flashed you a satisfied smirk, nodding his head.  “That’s all I needed to hear, babe.”  Without another word, he gripped his hands around your thighs roughly and lifted your legs to drape over his shoulders.  Leaning forward, he closed the remaining space and attached his lips to your pussy.  Rather than making you wait any longer to have the tension relieved, he immediately went to work on your throbbing clit, gently sucking at the sensitive bundle of nerves.  Once he was pleased by the moans leaving your lips and the clenching of your thighs, he pulled his lips off and replaced it with his tongue.  Expertly circling his tongue on your clit, he reached one hand down and, without warning, began to pump one of his fingers in and out of your pussy.

“F-Fuck, oh my god, Jungkook,” you moaned out loudly, pulling harshly at his hair with one hand and reaching the other up to pinch at one of your nipples.  “R-Right there.”

“Mmm, need to get you stretched out and ready for my cock,” he murmured against your heat, quickly inserting another finger and curving them at the perfect angle to hit your g-spot with every pulse.  After circling your clit with his tongue a few more times, he encircled the bud with his lips yet again, this time humming against it to add an extra feeling of friction.

The sensation of his tongue and fingers working on your pussy and the sight of his glistening face was quickly becoming too much to handle.  With every movement, the bundle of nerves in your core was getting closer and closer to snapping and sending you into that blissful state you so longed for.  Biting down on your lower lip roughly, you closed your eyes tightly.  “I-I’m close.”

“Open your eyes.  I want you looking at me while you cum all over my tongue,” he rasped out after pulling back slightly, only leaning back down once you obeyed his command.  After a moment, he wet two of his fingers on his tongue before quickly beginning to circle them on your clit, moving his tongue in and out of your cunt at the same speed.

“F-Fuck, Jungkook!” you yelled out, forcing your eyes to remain open and fixed on his as you were quickly sent over the edge and into a state of ecstasy.  Your walls spasmed around his tongue as your vision became blurry and filled with stars.  The feeling was only prolonged as Jungkook kept moving his tongue until you couldn’t take it anymore and reached forward to push his head back slightly, left completely breathless as you stared at him.

Getting off his knees and onto his feet, Jungkook stared down at you in awe, leaning forward to press his forehead against yours.  The sight of your release on his lips that he refused to wipe off had your core already begging for more.  “God, that was so fucking hot.  You’re so fucking beautiful.”  Letting out a deep breath, he pecked your lips a couple times.

“How are you so fucking good at that?” you muttered against his lips, blindly reaching forward in search of the tie on his sweatpants.  Once you found it, you tugged roughly at it, sitting up straighter to urge both his pants and boxers down his thighs.

Chuckling to himself, Jungkook assisted you and pulled the articles of clothing down the length of his legs, stepping out of them once they reached the floor.  “I’d like to think that I’m a gentleman in the streets and a freak in the sheets…” His eyes wandered around the room for a moment.  “Or in the gym equipment room, apparently.”  

Rolling your eyes and giggling at his joke, you pulled him forward again to peck his lips.  “You know, if you moved to the side and let me get up, I’d happily return the favor.”  Your eyes wandered down the front of his body until they set on his hardened cock resting against his stomach, the sight of it causing you to clench your thighs together.

Shaking his head in response, Jungkook flashed you a shy smile.  God, how could he be so sexual yet so cute at the same time?  “As enticing as that sounds and as much as I would never turn that down on any other occasion, I’m afraid I’m not going to last if I don’t fuck you right now.”  Stepping forward, he looked down before cursing under his breath.  “Fuck, I don’t have a condom on me.  We don’t have fuck to if you’re not comfortable.”

“Wow, you didn’t bring a condom with you to your 7am fitness class?  How irresponsible of you,” you joked, shoving his shoulder before pulling him closer to you.  “I’m on the pill and I’m clean, so as long as you’re clean it’s fine with me.”

“You know, you’re going to regret teasing me,” he warned, laughing softly as he nudged his nose against yours.  “But yes, I’m clean too.”

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you raised a mocking eyebrow at him.  “Oh yeah?  And why am I going to regret it?”

Without another word, Jungkook reached down and grabbed his cock with one of his hands.  Rather than pushing it right inside of you, he instead slowly started to rub its angry red tip up and down your folds.  His eyes remained on yours, a teasing smirk tugging at the edges of his lips.

Biting on your tongue to suppress your whimpers, your eyes wandered down to the area between your thighs.  “W-What are you doing?”

Pressing his lips against your jawline, he let out an amused chuckle.  “Nothing until you tell me what you need.  Use your words, sweetheart.”

Reaching around him, you dug your nails into the skin on his upper back.  It wasn’t in your character to beg during sex, but the sight of the tip of his cock glistening in your juices from your first orgasm was enough to make you give in.  “P-Please fuck me, Jungkook.”  You forced yourself to lock eyes with him, hoping that the desperation you were exuding would be enough to make him cave.

Grinning in amusement against the skin of your neck, he nodded his head.  “Good girl.”  Sliding his cock down your folds one last time, he slowly slid it inside of your entrance once he reached it, a loud groan escaping his lips as he pushed all the way inside of you.  “F-Fuck, you’re so tight.”

Moaning out in pleasure at the feeling of fullness, you whimpered as you watched the sight of his cock disappearing inside of you.  The spectacle alone was enough to make the heat in your core reemerge, and your body was pleading for him to do more.  “M-Move.  F-Faster, please.”

Grabbing one of your legs, he extended it upward and propped it over his shoulder.  After getting a good grip on it, he quickly began to thrust in and out of you.  “Yeah?  You like that, babe?” he breathed out, his eyes screwing shut in pleasure before he buried his face into your neck again.

Dragging your nails down his sweaty back, you were sure you were going to leave some marks behind.  It only took a few moments for the feeling of overstimulation to wash away, and a new, deeper pleasure to replace it.  With your leg hanging over his shoulder, his cock managed to hit you at just the right angle with every thrust.  Using your grip on his back to press your body closer to his, you took the opportunity to wrap your free leg tightly around his waist.  The new position made it so his cock brushed against your clit every time he pulled it out of you, the feeling nearly having your eyes rolling to the back of your head.  “O-Oh my god, right there.”

Jungkook’s half-lidded eyes remained fixed on yours as he lifted one hand off of your thigh, pressing his index and middle finger together and moving them toward your mouth.  “Open.”  Once you complied, he inserted his fingers into your mouth.  His teeth dug into his lower lip as he watched the way you closed your lips, swirling your tongue around his digits a couple of times before sliding your lips back up and releasing them with a loud ‘pop.’  There was a mesmerized look in Jungkook’s eyes as his thrusts slowed for a moment.  “J-Jesus fuck, that was hot.”

A cocky smirk initially tried to spread across your lips, but it was washed away the moment he began to circle his lubricated fingers over your clit, his cock pounding in and out of your pussy at a pace that had you ready to unravel at any second.  “I-I’m close.”

Letting out what sounded like a combination of a groan and a whimper, Jungkook leaned forward and brushed his lips over yours.  “Cum all over my cock for me, babe.”

“J-Jungkook, f-fuck!” The sound of his raspy command and the feeling of his cock inside of you was all it took to push you over the edge again.  Your second orgasm hit you even harder than the first, a sensation of rapturous bliss overtaking your senses as your toes curled and your thighs were left convulsing around his body.  While your mind went foggy for a few seconds, the strain that was left in the back of your throat suggested that you had yelled out in pleasure quite loudly.  The euphoria was dragged out even longer as Jungkook had yet to reach his own high, his thrusts becoming sloppier as you stared up at him with hazy vision, gasping for breath.

“I-I’m close too,” Jungkook whimpered out, eyes screwing shut as your walls continued to twitch around his cock in the aftershock of your orgasm.  “W-Where do you want me to cum, babe?”

Coming back to your senses, you blinked a few times until your vision returned back to normal.  Finally processing his request, you used quite a bit of your strength to push him back a bit, ignoring the confused look on his face.  Using the space in front of you, you pushed yourself off of the elevated surface before getting down on your knees.  “My mouth.”  Reaching forward, you grasped his shaft in one hand, pumping his length a few times before leaning down and capturing his tip between your lips.  After circling your tongue around it a few times, you hollowed out your cheeks and began to bob your head up and down.

“O-Oh my… F-Fuck, Y/N.” Jungkook quickly adapted to the new sensation, his hands reaching around your head to tangle into your hair and urge your head down his cock further.  He locked eyes with you from above, his legs trembling around your head.  Taking notice of just how close he was, you forced your mouth down further to accommodate the rest of his cock in your mouth, swallowing around his length at the bottom.  The motion and the feeling of the tip of his length hitting the back of your throat was enough to make you gag, and that was all it took to push Jungkook to his climax.

Jungkook was a groaning mess above you as he released his load down your throat, unconsciously thrusting into your mouth further a couple of times to ride out of high.  After a few more spurts of his hot cum filled your mouth, you worked your mouth back up his length.  Once your lips popped off of the tip of his cock, you pulled back and swallowed thickly, the salty taste of his release lingering in your throat.

After taking a few moments to catch his breath, Jungkook reached down and grabbed your hand, pulling you up onto your feet in front of him.  Despite the crude nature of what had just occurred, the smile stretched across his lips seemed so… Innocent.  “Well… That happened.”  He reached up and pushed the sweaty hair that was sticking to his forehead out of his face.

Laughing softly at his words, you bit your lip and crossed your arms over your chest.  “I mean, that’s certainly one way to work out at the gym.”

Jungkook’s whole body shook as he erupted into laughter, leaning down and beginning to grab all of your discarded clothing articles off of the ground.  He sorted through them and handed you back yours, beginning to redress himself after.  Once he was dressed, he grabbed a towel out of one of the crates and made sure the area was clean.  “Don’t forget we worked out before too.  That’s two whole workouts.  We’re going to need to fuel up with some electrolytes or coffee or something.”

Forcing your damp leggings back onto your sweaty body wasn’t exactly the easiest or most enjoyable thing to do, but you managed.  Once your shirt was back on, you looked back over at him and feigned an exaggerated amount of excitement.  “Oh my god, am I going to be able to get coffee with hot coffee shop boy?”

“Only if hot coffee shop girl would be so willing to accompany him,” Jungkook jived, nudging your shoulder with his before unlocking and pulling open the door of the closet.  To your relief, the room was still empty and there seemed to be no one lurking outside of it.  Grabbing his backpack at the front of the room, he slung it over his shoulder.  “It might be a good idea for us to shower first, though.  I have a strong suspicion that we probably smell prettttty bad.”

Grabbing your own bag and water bottle, you laughed in amusement as you followed him out the door of the classroom and into the main area of the gym.  “I have a feeling you’re right.  Should we shower and plan to meet up after?”

Walking through the lobby, Jungkook held open the main door for you before following you outside.  It was much brighter out now than when you had arrived at the facility almost two hours prior.  Time really does fly by when you’re having fun.  “I feel like we can’t really be trusted with the whole ‘see you around’ thing and going our separate ways just yet after the shit we both pulled avoiding each other the past couple weeks.  Plus, I’m not quite done with you just yet.”

Snickering at the reminder of your past dramatic behavior, you nodded your head in agreement.  “So what did you have in mind?”

Stopping in his tracks, Jungkook turned to face you.  “So first, I was thinking you could come back to my place and we could both shower there.  I could provide you with some clothes for the time being, but if you need to change later, I can bring you back to your place.”  The corners of his lips began to twitch upward.  “However, that would require you getting into my car with me, and history suggests that doing so ‘makes you nervous,’ or something like that.”

“Hmm, I’m pretty sure I remember something about me making you nervous too.  I think some weird drunk guy told me that.”  Scoffing at his flirtatious teasing, you playfully shoved his chest.  “Anything else planned?”

“Hey, that ‘weird drunk guy’ is the reason we’re here today,” he scoffed, grabbing one of your hands off of his chest and lacing his fingers with yours.  “Then I was thinking we could go to our favorite coffee shop.  But… And I know this is kind of a wild idea... I’m thinking we sit at the same table for the first time instead of dropping pens and books to try to get each other’s attention from across the room.”

Squeezing his hand, you began to follow him as he led the way to what you assumed was going to be his car.  “A bold suggestion, but I’m into it.  Might have you drop a book at my feet and I’ll stare at you across the room longingly just for old time’s sake.”  When you reached a shiny black SUV, Jungkook unlocked it and walked around the passenger side, opening the door for you.  “So I’m guessing these plans involve us skipping classes today?”

“Well, obviously.”  Jungkook flashed you a bright grin as you climbed into the car, shutting the door gently once you were in the seat.  He ran around the front of it and quickly hopped into the driver’s seat, leaning over to look at you once inside.  “And then once the evening comes, as I suggested earlier, I would still love to take you out to dinner, if you’d let me.”  Despite everything that had just unfolded and all of the confessions you both had shared, there still appeared to be a glimmer of nervousness and hesitation in his eyes.

Leaning to the side, you reached over and placed your hand on top of his.  Your lips formed into a reassuring smile.  “I would love to.”

Jungkook lifted your hand that was over his to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss against your fingers.  “Good.”  Turning to face forward, he started the car and began to back out of the space.  As he looked at the pathway in front of the gym, he directed a mischievous smirk at you.  “Remember that time you walked back to your room on a swollen toe to avoid getting into my car with me?  Good times.”

Letting out a groan, you covered your flushed face with both of your hands.  “If you don’t shut up, I’m about to hit you with a ‘see you around’ and roll right out of the side of your car while it’s moving.”

“Okay, okay.  I’m sorrrry,” Jungkook laughed to himself, grabbing the wrist closest to him to pull your hand off of your face.  “As compensation for your shame, I will make another embarrassing confession.”  He knitted his brow together as he thought for a few moments before chuckling to himself as a memory came to mind.  “I once accidentally liked one of your Instagram pictures that was like… 72 weeks old and almost considered moving to another country and changing my identity.  I unliked it right away and you probably didn’t even notice, but I was stressed.  There.  Does that make you feel better?”

Gnawing on the inside of your cheek to hide your smile, you glanced at the side of his face.  “Mmm, a little bit.  I think I’m going to need you to keep going.”

Jungkook scoffed as he placed your hand that he was holding down on his thigh, shaking his head in disbelief.  “How is that fair?  I think I deserve some form of payment if I’m going to keep exposing myself too.”

“Fine, fine.”  You gently squeezed his thigh, your mind sifting through all of the embarrassing things you had done in the past due to your embarrassing infatuation of the boy who was now sitting beside you.  “I tried to order you, like, a sort of secret admirer coffee on Valentine’s Day, but the barista ended up giving it to the wrong guy and I ended up leaving the shop because I was so mortified.”

“Aw, I’ve always wanted to have a secret admirer,” Jungkook teased, parking the car in front of his building.  “God, we really could go on forever with these embarrassing stories, huh?”

Nodding your head, you reached your hand up and playfully poked at his dimple.  “It sure seems that way.  We’re kind of the worst.”

Unbuckling his seatbelt and hopping out of the car, he met you at the front of it and draped an arm over your shoulders.  “Good.  Just gives me another reason to keep you around longer.”

And while ‘see you around’ hadn’t been a promise that either of you kept before, keeping you around from then on certainly was one that he fulfilled.

[andreafmn]

I'm Not Afraid - Chapter 1

Word Count: 3,325

Characters: Female Reader Argent Character, Original Male Argent Character, Derek Hale, Allison Argent, Scott McCall, Stiles Stilinski, Isaac Lahey, Lydia Martin, Chris Argent, Jackson Whittemore

Story Description: (Y/N) Argent arrived at Beacon Hills to put to rest her father's sister, Kate Argent. For the first time, her family has decided to settle down and sustain a life in this interesting small town. After 17 years, (Y/N) has the opportunity to establish interpersonal relationships but will she be ready to face the complications that come with relating to her cousin's, Allison, friends; especially, the infamous Derek Hale. She will face the adventure of being associated with the Derek and McCall pack as well as being faced with the discovery of certain aspects of her life she never imagined.

*DISCLAIMER* I do not own in any way Teen Wolf, all credits of the pre-established characters, script, and storyline belong to Jeff Davis and MTV Network. The only thing I own is Argent Reader insert, her immediate family, and her storyline, as well as her effects in the others' storyline.

Chapter: 1/?

Chapter Description: (Y/N) finally arrives at Beacon Hills for the funeral of her aunt and meets a certain wolf to which she feels a special connection.

A/N: Second fandom I'm writing for. I love Teen Wolf so much and the trope of hard Derek but only soft for you makes my heart sing. If you enjoy my writing I’ll also be posting them in AO3 and Wattpad along with other stories (I also hope to start taking requests if ya’ll want) Hope you enjoy and all constructive criticism is encouraged.

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Chapter 1

I hugged the black coat to my body as hard as I could whilst pushing through the sea of press. Our family's last name became quite known after the reports about my aunt, whose burial we were attending. She had allegedly burned down a house with people in it.  She killed them in cold blood. I hugged my grieving uncle and his less grieving wife, then my cousin who had a painful look on her face. I hugged her the longest. She let herself crumble on my arms, sobbing uncontrollably. Even though she was a horrible person she was still our aunt, family.

I took my seat behind Allison when my father, my mother, uncle Chris, and aunt Victoria stood up. Allison didn't lift her head and neither did I. I just tried to comfort her.

"It's been such a long time I don't expect you to call me grandpa." We both looked up to see a white-haired man who resembled the Argent features. "Don't worry about it, just call me Gerard." He hugged both of us, an overpowering aura emanating from his being. When we were engulfed, I looked to the side and saw two boys squatting behind a gravestone. If they were hiding, they were doing a horrible job at it.

"But I prefer Grandpa," Gerard said walking to his seat. I sat back down and drifted off during the whole ceremony. Once it was over, I joined my parents and we drove to our new house. I have a feeling that life here will be very interesting.

That weekend I decided that I had been putting working out off for too long. I changed into comfortable workout clothes and gave food to my dog, Brody. I headed out the door, put my earbuds on, and started to jog. I really didn't know where I was going since it was a new place for me, all I know is that I kept running until I reached the woods. The bad thing about this, I had no idea how to get back home. Even though I knew of this sidetrack and I knew I would be late to get back home, I kept running, needing a release from the mundane feeling of being new in town and having to reunite from our estranged family in a funeral.

I had gained a lot of momentum. God knows how fast I was running at this point that is until I hit something, it almost felt like a wall. When I looked up, I saw a very handsome guy. Spiked hair, green eyes, and slight stubble. If it weren't for the fact that I was already sweaty I would have started to sweat showers of how nervous I was. That is until he opened his mouth.

"Watch where you're going." He growled at me.

"How about you fucking move and not be a prick?" He looked at me with big eyes, probably in surprise, but quickly changed to his menacing look. Who was he trying to fool?

"Well, this is private property, which means that you're trespassing, meaning you should pay more attention to your surroundings."

"I'm sorry but a burnt-down house with almost no walls or roof is barely a property. So, how about you stop being an idiot and I can be on my way." I started to jog once again but he gained my attention once more.

"You're new here, aren't you?" I turned around to face him.

"What's it to you?" He raised his eyebrow.

"I'll take that as a yes." The cockiness oozed out of his pores.

"And why the hell should that matter?"

"Because no one would dare talk to me that way."

"Who would be afraid of a little sour wolf?" He tensed up. "Dude, chill. I'm just kidding. But I doubt anyone would be afraid of Mr...."

"Hale. Derek Hale." He said extending his hand to me. Gee, after screaming at me he wants us to be acquaintances. I thought about not shaking his hand, but I didn't want to be rude. Well, more than I have been already.

"(Y/N). Argent." I shook his hand. Strong grip. Suddenly I felt a rush of déjà vu; I had met him the day before. "Wait, aren't you that guy I accidentally hit with my grocery cart yesterday?"

"Yeah, that really hurt. You hit my ankle. You could've had me limping."

"But you're not, so be grateful I didn't break your ankle." He laughed. "Damn, if I had known how cocky you really were, I would've hit you harder."

"So, you admit that you hit me?"

"Oh yeah, of course, I hit you. Accidentally that is."

"Yeah, yeah."

I looked around trying to find where the hell I had come from but there wasn't even the slightest trail as to where I was to go.

"So, miss (Y/N). Do you even know your way home?"

"No, but I'm sure I can find my way back." Then, he took keys out of his pocket and pointed to his car.

"Come on, I'll drive you around and you just tell me when something seems familiar."

"And why should I go with the guy that almost ripped out my throat for bumping into him? For all I know you could be driving me to my death." I crossed my arms over my chest, and he let out a loud sigh.

"Look, I'm sorry for snapping. But I'm trying to be nice. That doesn't happen very often."

"Alright, Mr. Hale. I'll let you take me home just because you are being nice now, after being a prick, and I'm exhausted."

"See, no one can resist me." I rolled my eyes at his cockiness. Seriously does he buy cans of it on eBay?

"Don't get cocky with me. I can punch the living daylights out of you." He chuckled and started to drive.

We drove for about 20 minutes until I finally recognized the curb that led to my house. Upon arriving at my driveway, I got out of the car and walked to the driver’s side.

"Give me your hand” For some reason, I felt compelled to do so. He took a pen and wrote down a number. "Call me if you ever need a tour of the town."

Three weeks later, I walked inside the school to meet up with Allison. I moved here with my family since dad had some business taking float. Being the new kid in town is never fun. I would know. I switch schools almost every year. The pro and con about this would be not being attached to anyone. Usually, I'm the one who doesn't talk to anyone and is called a freak. A derogatory term given to people who are way too different from others, but a title I wore proudly.

"Oh my gosh, (Y/N)! How have you been?" Allison wrapped her arms around me and hugged me tightly. It was as if she hadn't seen me just three weeks ago.

"Hi, Allison. I've been good, getting acclimated to the new town. You?" You would think that because we were cousins, I would be more affectionate towards her but honestly, I wouldn't see her again for like three more years, so what's the point?

"I'm good. A little rocky at the start of coming here but good." Then, a boy with a buzz cut and one with great brown hair walked by and smiled at Alli. "Ooh, you should come meet my friends. Stiles, Scott!! Come here." The boys turned around with goofy grins on their faces.

"Hey, Allison. Who's this?" Buzzcut kid said.

"This is my cousin, (Y/N). She just moved here from Virginia."

"Pleasure to meet you. I'm Scott." The one with the great hair said.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Stiles." I shook their hands and smiled.

"Nice to meet you, too, buzzcut." Allison and Scott laughed but Stiles only ran his hand through his hair, suddenly becoming hyperaware of his lack of locks.

"Allison. Who might this sexy lady be?" I rolled my eyes. The last thing I need is a narcissist with a god-complex trying to get close.

"Oh, Jackson, this is my cousin, (Y/N)."

"Hi." He extended his hand and looked me up and down.

"Hi." I smiled sarcastically, and when I didn't extend my hand, he dropped his.

Finally, after standing awkwardly behind Allison whilst her friends talked, the bell rang. Talk about saved by the bell.

"Hey, (Y/N), what's your first class?" I checked my schedule.

"Um, chemistry."

"Oh, good, then you're coming with us to Mr. Harris' class," Scott said pointing towards him and Stiles. I smiled and walked behind them.

Once we got to the classroom everyone turned to me, the ever-present sign of being new in the class evident in the stare of my classmates.

"Um, hi, my name is (Y/N) Argent and I'm new." The teacher, whom I guess is Mr. Harris, turned around to face me.

"Oh, yes, Miss Argent. Welcome. You will be sitting next to Isaac Lahey. Lahey, raise your hand." Once Isaac raised his hand, I noticed he was sat near Stiles and Scott. Two people I was trying to avoid. As I walked past, I accidentally pushed Stiles' book on his lap, startling him, resulting in an awkward descent from his lab stool onto the floor.

"Hi, again. I guess we are gonna see a lot of each other for the rest of the school year." I nodded and he scratched the back of his neck. "So, um, what school did you come from?"

"Lancaster High," I responded whilst writing down what Mr. Harris was writing on the board. Stiles kept trying to talk to me, but I would only give him short, cold answers or just ignore him. That is until Mr. Harris called our attention, that's when he finally got the memo to shut up.

"I'm sorry to bother you, but I just wanted to introduce myself since we're gonna be seated next to each other all year. I'm Isaac."

"I figured." I tried giving him my best smile. The vibe he was giving off seemed like he needed it. "I'm (Y/N)."

"Well, nice to meet you, (Y/N). Now I'll leave you to the class because if I don't I know I'll be failing even more than I am."

"Oh, well, maybe I can tutor you some time. I'm actually really good at science. My mom was a chemist professor once upon a time so I'm bound to understand all this."

"Really?!" His puppy eyes seemed to light up and I nodded. "That would actually be amazing."

"Sure thing. Now let's get back to class."

After Chemistry finished, I put everything in my bag as quickly as possible and sped to my next class, Math. Thankfully, none of Allison's friends shared this class with me but I did share it with Isaac.  I didn't consider him much a friend but more an acquaintance in desperate need of help.

As the day progressed, I noticed the rest of my classes were shared with one or more of Allison's friends. They all tried to strike up a conversation but were quickly discouraged when met with my one-worded or vague answers. Especially, Stiles. He tried especially hard to get answers out of me, only being met with the occasional laugh or stare at his comical occurrences. He seemed like the kind of person you could just open up to. The same could be said about Scott. His shy nature was alluring, and he portrayed himself as a very trustworthy and loyal being.

But I would not allow myself to let them in. My whole being yearned for a real friendship, someone to share nothing and everything; never again.

At lunch, I sat outside and ate my food quietly, a book in front of my face to shield my eyes from the sun the prevalent stares of my peers. After some minutes of appreciated loneliness, the empty table was filled with conversating teenage bodies. I smiled politely but, in my mind, I was cursing them out.

"So, (Y/N), how's your day been?" Allison asked whilst munching on an apple. I swallowed what was left of my bite and answered.

"Fine, thank you." This time no one pressed on after my short answers, finally getting the hint of my disinterest. In the corner of my eye, I saw Isaac sitting under a tree munching on half a sandwich. I excused myself and went to join him, heavily enjoying his tranquil aura.

"Oh, hi, (Y/N)." He smiled sheepishly.

"Hey, Isaac. Is that all you're eating?"

"Yeah. I'm not very hungry." He looked down as if he were ashamed.

"Nonsense! Here," I gave him the other half of my burger and another bag of chips I had in my bag. "You can't tell me you're not hungry. You're a boy in peak development."

"Thanks." He smiled as he continued munching on his food. I put on some music and we continued eating in silence. No conversation required.

The day went on smoother than it started. Classes flew by fairly quickly and the incessant chit-chat seemed to diminish. During last period I was like every other student, anxiously waiting for the bell to signal the end of the school day. When my pleads were answered, I packed the necessary book into my bag and left the rest in my locker, expertly avoiding any more social encounters. Quickly, I made my way to the waiting open car door of my father's car, ignoring Allison's beckoning me t.wards the small group of friends.

"How was your first day, darling?" My father spoke up breaking my attention from the scenery.

"Like any other first day I've had." I smiled. "The towns might change but school is always the same."

Finally at home, we were greeted with the sight of my mother cooking; people were coming over.

"(Y/N), honey, Chris, Victoria, and Allison are coming over tonight. So, go do a quick workout and come back to get ready." I nodded and ran to my room to change into workout clothes.

My routine would normally consist of waking up, working out, go to school for a dreading eight hours, come back home, workout again, do my homework, eat, and go to sleep. I lead a very monotonous life and it had been this way since I could remember. One of my earliest memories was of my father teaching me archery alongside Allison, a great distraction to our always disrupted home life. As I got older, my father started training me in boxing and knife maneuvering. How would these skills help me in life were still a mystery but I felt safe knowing them.

I got changed and decided to take Brody out with me on a quick jog through the woods. "Hey, boy, ready to go?"

He jumped on me which I took as a yes and started for the woods. We ran down the same trail I had been going on for the past three weeks. Mostly, I went down this track in hopes that Derek would make an appearance, and today was not the exception. As the ruins of his house came to view so did his tall figure.

"Trespassing again?"

"It doesn't count if I know the owner." During our greeting, Brody's leash slipped out of my hand and he ran to jump on Derek, leaving slobbering licks on his cheek. "I'm so sorry."

"Don't worry about it." He chuckled and helped me bring him down.

"I guess he likes you, even though he doesn't like anyone but me. Guess you're special."

"Maybe." He grinned.

Out of nowhere, I hit him in the shoulder. "What was that for?!"

"For trying to run me over with your shopping cart two days ago. It was uncalled for."

"No, it was revenge. You hit ME first. In the ankle."

"You're still on with that. Come on, sour wolf. That happened three weeks ago, and it was an accident."

"Whatever. Come on, I'll give you a ride home. It's getting kind of dark." This had also become part of my routine. After "bumping" into Derek he would offer to drop me off at my house, claiming it was for security.

"Okay, we're here. By the way, the offer to show you around town is still up. Just call me whenever." He said as he stopped the car in front of my house.

"Alright, will do, and thanks for the ride, Derek. I'd invite you in, but my family is coming over."

"No worries, maybe another time."

"It's a date. Anyways, thanks again. See you when I see you."

"Okay, goodnight."

"Night." He waited until I entered the house and drove away.

"Munchkin, is that you?" My father screamed from the kitchen.

"Yeah!" I screamed back.

"Okay, well, go take a shower and get ready your uncle will get here soon."

I hurried up the stairs and hopped in the shower letting the hot water stream down my body calming any aching muscle that was palpitating. In my room, I searched through my closet for an acceptable family dinner outfit, deciding a grey sweater and black jeans would be enough. I braided my hair out of my face and went downstairs to help my mother set the table.

After we put the last plate the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it!" I ran to the door and was greeted by my uncle. "Uncle Chris!" I jumped and he hugged me. There was no doubt that he was my favorite family member, his presence was always welcoming. His wife on the other hand was as cold as the winters we spent in New York. She was nice but absolutely scary. "Hi, Aunt Victoria."

"Hello, (Y/N)." I hugged her and said hi to Allison.

"Come in, guys." They walked in and I closed the door behind them.

"So, (Y/N), how have you been?" Uncle Chris asked while stuffing his mouth with mom's famous lasagna.

"I've been good. I mean, moving all the time takes a toll on you at first, but I got used to it. It's easy now to pack it all up once the school year ends."

"Oh, honey, that must be so hard on you," Victoria said. I could not read her tone, her words spoke in sympathetic notes with an underlying melody of sarcasm.  Not knowing what to answer, I bit my lip and nodded.

The whole evening was spent on us catching up and eating, laughing, playing games, but the good times came to an end when the clock hit 9:00 pm. It was stupid to set a curfew, but my mom usually had everyone in bed at this time, 10:30 as of late.

"You better come around the house more often." Uncle Chris demanded and hugged me.

"Yes, sir." I raised my hand to my eyebrow and saluted, as did he.

"Let's go, Chris. And thank you for the lovely dinner, Rebecca," Victoria said linking arms with my uncle and smiling at mom.

"No problem. Come by any time." They talked for a bit more and after they left, I went upstairs to change for bed.

"Momma, I'm gonna go to sleep."

"Okay, honey. Goodnight." I went upstairs, brushed my teeth, and put my hair in a ponytail.

Before bed, I made sure everything I would need for the next day was packed into my bag and made sure my alarm was set. I pulled all the throw pillows from my bed and set them aside, then making my way to the window to draw the curtains. Something caught my attention in the backyard, though. My eyes squinted trying to make out the figure in front of me. Blinking the confusion away, I made a double-take and looked back at an empty yard. I laughed to myself as I crept into bed. Why would Derek be in my backyard?

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[hookingminor]

highly requested part 2 to this angsty blurb, and this marks the end of my 2k blurb weekend! thank you all for joining me and I hope you enjoyed!

-

Matthew wandered back to the hotel well after midnight.

The rehearsal dinner ended around nine in the evening, but after spending an hour on that deck thinking about everything you said, he decided to take a long walk around the neighborhood.

He wandered through the church venue Willow had booked and sat at the pews for a few minutes, taking in all the decorations that were already set up. Then, he made his way back to the barn where the reception would take place, and all of it just felt wrong: the decor, the table settings, the flowers, none of it felt right.

Matthew didn’t put much thought into the wedding, per Willow’s requests, but it only hit him just how little he contributed to all of it as he sat on his hotel bed and thought about what his ideal wedding would look like.

He didn’t even want to get married in Calgary.

It made sense he would since Willow had lived here her whole life, but Matthew always imagined his wedding taking place in St. Louis where his entire family and all his friends could attend. Besides his immediate family and teammates, no one else could make the long trip to Calgary for his wedding.

When Matthew pictured his wedding, he also pictured you standing at the end of the aisle, too. Matthew was sure Willow’s dress would be gorgeous and she would look absolutely beautiful tomorrow, but when he pictured you standing there in her place, he was filled with a fluttering of butterflies in his stomach he couldn’t deny.

Which is what led him to knocking on Willow’s door at one in the morning.

It took a few minutes before she woke, bleary eyed and confused as to why her fiance was seeking her out so late in the night. “Matthew? What is it? You’re not supposed to see me before the wedding.” She pulled her robe tighter around her body, as if trying to shield Matthew’s eyes from her.

That was another superstition Matthew didn’t like. He nearly begged Willow to spend the night with him before the wedding, not buying into the ‘bad luck’ bullshit people always said about sleeping together before the ceremony, but she wouldn’t budge.

“I know, I’m sorry for the intrusion, but I think we need to talk,” Matthew said. He was still dressed in his suit from the dinner, though he’d shed his jacket and tie long ago. Willow’s face fell at his words, but she let him inside her room anyway.

Matthew sat on the edge of the bed awkwardly and fiddled with his thumbs as Willow sat next to him. Silence filled the room. Matthew didn’t know how to say it.

“Is this about Y/N?” Willow asked calmly after a few minutes passed. “I saw you two talking outside earlier.”

Matthew looked at his fiance, her eyes sad and face dismal. He nodded.

“I figured,” she sighed.

“I’m sorry,” Matthew said because he didn’t know what else to say.

Then Willow said the most unexpected thing.

“It’s okay.”

Matthew’s confusion was clear on his face, and Willow let out a genuine laugh as she took his hand in hers.

“I thought if you saw her and she moved on, we could’ve made this work, but that wasn’t the case, was it?” She asked, and Matthew nodded again.

“I can’t say I’m surprised,” she continued. “I always knew you still loved her.”

“I really did love you,” Matthew said. “I do love you… it’s just…”

“You love her more,” Willow finished for him.

“I am sorry,” Matthew pleaded. “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen, but then I saw her and… I can’t let her go.”

“I know,” Willow said, squeezing his hand comfortingly, and then let out a deep sigh. “Well, I guess we better tell our folks the wedding’s off, huh?”

-

Matthew showed up to your place a month later.

He stood outside your apartment, nervous and shaking, with a bouquet of your favorite flowers in his hands. You hadn’t heard from him since booking the first flight out of Calgary, dodging all his calls and texts that came in over the week after his wedding. You effectively stayed off social media, deleting all the apps you knew you still had Matthew on in fear of seeing wedding pictures.

The surprise on your face was evident when you answered the door to find Matthew on the other side.

“Aren’t you supposed to be on your honeymoon or something?” You asked.

“I didn’t go through with it. I couldn’t after seeing you,” Matthew explained. “Can I come in?”

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you let Matthew follow you inside. He’d never seen your apartment before. You’d moved places shortly after your breakup, trying to erase the memories of Matthew that existed on every surface of your old apartment.

He held out the flowers for you, which you took and placed into a vase and filled with water. Matthew’s eyes roamed your new place, taking in all the photos you had on your fridge to the books you kept on your bookshelves.

“To what do I owe the pleasure, Matthew?” You asked.

Matthew’s gaze focused back on you. “I always hated it when you called me Matthew.” A smile tugged at the corner of his lips.

“What do you want?” You rephrased, ignoring his comment.

“I want to give us another shot,” Matthew answered confidently.

You weren’t quite sure what you were expecting him to say, but it was definitely not that.

“Matthew—”

“And before you tell me how bad of an idea it is, because I know that’s what you’re about to say, just hear me out.”

Your mouth snapped shut and you waited for him to continue.

“I love you. I’m in love with you. I have been for years, and I’m never going to not be in love with you,” Matthew said. “After you left, I couldn’t stop thinking about you, and I realized that marrying Willow wasn’t what I wanted. When I picture my future I see you in it. I see you at the end of that aisle on our wedding day. I see you and me in a house with a dog and maybe a few kids. I see you waiting for me at home at the end of the day, and I see you beside me when I wake up in the morning.”

“Matthew, we tried this before,” you sighed. “We tried the long distance, and it didn’t work.”

“And I’m willing to try again,” Matthew replied, crossing the few feet of space between you to cup your face in his hands. “We were young and dumb and immature, and I pressured you to change your life for me when I shouldn’t have. I’m not asking you to pack up your life and move to Calgary right now. Hell, if you don't ever want to move to Canada, you don’t have to. I’ll move to wherever you want to be because wherever you are is where I belong.”

“I’m in this for the long haul,” he added. “There is no one else out there for me, and there never will be.”

Tears welled in your eyes at his profession, and Matthew’s thumb came to swipe at a stray tear that rolled down your cheek.

“What makes you think this time will be different?” You questioned softly.

“Because I’m different. We’re different. And I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make you happy. You’re all I want.”

“You’d really request a trade for me?” Matthew nodded.

“It wasn’t fair to put that all on you then, and I know that. I shouldn’t have asked you to do something I wasn’t willing to do myself, but I’m telling you now that I’d do anything for you,” he answered.

Throwing your arms around Matthew’s neck, you pressed your entire body into his. Arms tightened around your torso, keeping you snug against him, and Matthew tucked your head into his chest.

“So what do you say? Can you give me a second chance?” He mumbled into your hair.

“I think we’re well past second chances,” you chuckled.

“I promise it’ll be the last one you need to give me,” Matthew laughed, grasping the base of your neck.

In an attempt to blink away his own tears, a few streamed down his cheeks. Leaning forward, you kissed away the tears, leaving his cheeks wet, but Matthew had a dopey grin on his face all the same.

“I’m all in,” you replied to his question, and Matthew had to take a second to make sure he heard you correctly.

His grin spread wider, and he crashed his lips to yours, both of your smiles getting in the way but neither of you cared. Matthew peppered your face in kisses: your brow, your cheeks, your nose, your chin. There was not one inch of skin he left untouched.

You giggled in his arms, twisting your face to the side to avoid the tickling of his scruff against your cheeks, but he kept you close to his body.

“I love you,” he said finally, “and I’m sorry it took me so long to get my shit together.”

You caught his lips in a deep kiss. “All that matters is you’re here now.”

“Oh, I forgot something,” Matthew said, pulling back just enough to reach his hand into his pocket. 

A small box rested in the palm of his hand, and he opened it to show you the necklace he gifted to you nearly three years ago. When everything ended, you’d given it back to him, and he’d kept it tucked away in his bedside drawer since then.

The dainty ‘19’ hung from the chain, and Matthew undid the hook and looked at you with hopeful eyes. Your stomach did a flip as you turned around, and Matthew draped the jewelry around your neck, connecting it in the back and placing a soft kiss on the skin right above it.

“Now everything’s right where it belongs.”

[tomtenadia]

Remember us - part 3

Here we are with part 3.

This was a tough chapter to write.

Please do not hate Rowan, he is confused and scared and what is happening to him is scary.

-------

A slow tune played in the distance of the big garden. 

Rowan took Aelin’s hand and walked away from the big crowd and near the bank of the lake where it was just the two of them.

“Did you drag me here to kill me?”

Rowan in response kissed her and Aelin could not read his expression. His arms went around her frame and pulled her closer for a slow dance on the spot.

His hand brushed her back and let her scent envelope him. 

“Lys and Aedion look happy.” He whispered to her, enjoying the feeling of her in his arms. A presence he would never tire of.

“It was about time.” Aelin said kissing his chest.

“It’s our turn to be that happy, what do you think?” Rowan went down on one knee and gently grabbed her hand pulling it to his chest “Fireheart, I love you. You are my best friend, my soulmate and I want to walk the path of life at your side. I want to grow old with you and still watch silly movies on the sofa. Aelin Galathynius, will you do me the honour of marrying me and let me call you my wife?”

The smile on Aelin’s face became radiant “Yes,” a kiss on his lips “yes, buzzard, I will marry you.”

*

Rowan woke up panting hard. The memory had been very vivid and clear in his head. The colours, the smells, he felt as if he had been there. Aelin had told him about that memory, about the day he had proposed to her at a friend’s wedding.

The memory had felt so real and his hands were now shaking.

It had been a week since that conversation. Aelin had started visiting him on her way to work and sometimes during her breaks as well. They had been chatting and she had been telling more about their lives and answered all the questions he had. The topic he hadn’t had yet the courage to cover was the one about her being pregnant. He felt bad for snooping on the phone but that was his anyway and Aelin had given it to him with that exact intention. For him to read and discover more about who he had been and hopefully unlock more moments.

He was busy with his thoughts that he did nor notice a male nurse popping into his room.

“Time to go.”

The doctor had told him that now that he was awake it was time to finally start his rehab and to try have him walking again quite quickly.

The nurse helped him to shift onto the wheelchair and pushed him out.

“Can someone tell Aelin where I am gone? Sometimes she comes and visit on her break.”

“I am sure nurse Ytger will tell your wife that you went for physio.”

He had started to enjoy and wait eagerly for her visits. He wanted to tell her abut the flash of the day he proposed.

They finally arrived at the gym and a man was waiting for him “Hello Rowan and welcome to hell.” Said the man in front of him “You’ll probably will want to kill me after every session but I assure you I will make you walk again. I always do.” The man said quite smugly “my name is Dorian, by the way.”

For a half an hour Dorian massaged and warmed up and loosened his right leg. Every time he bent his knee Rowan was ready to cry. Until the man got him back on the wheelchair and they reached some parallel bars “now, we try walking.”

Rowan looked at him in disbelief. He could not be serious.

“Come on, hold on to the bars with your hands and pull yourself upright.”

He followed the directions and pulled himself up. 

“Good. Now try to move a step.”

Rowan tried but almost fell on his face if it wasn’t that Dorian grabbed him “don’t put weight on the injured leg yet.”

He was about to try again when he spotted Aelin in her blue scrubs entering the gym. Dorian saw her as well “are you going to look good in front of your wife?”

Aelin joined him “Hi devil.” She greeted Dorian.

“Hi my darling. Your hubby and I just started.”

“Just go easy on him. I just got him back.” And Rowan saw Aelin give him a warm smile. He needed to tell her about his dream. He wanted to revive that day with her, to know how she felt. She had looked happy in the memory. Rowan was also curious to know why she called him buzzard.

For another good hour he did all Dorian told him and by the end of the first session he did manage to walk once the length on the walking bars. Aelin had given him the most stunning smile.

They were now back in his room and she was helping him climb back in bed.

“You must be exhausted. Dorian’s sessions are tough, but the man does miracles.”

“My leg hurts…” he said fully leaning back in bed in a seated position.

“I should let you rest.” Aelin made a move to leave but he stopped her, grabbing her hand for a fleeting moment “stay, please.”

Aelin nodded and sat back down on the chair. He noticed her hand gently move to her stomach in a protective gesture.

“I had a dream.” He told her and saw his wife turn her head to him “it was the day I proposed. You had a green dress and we were at Lys and Aedion’s wedding.” He continued and saw her face break and try to hold back the tears “you called me buzzard.”

Aelin started sobbing. It was just one memory. It was not their entire life but it was something. She nodded eagerly and restrained herself from the desire to kiss him. She missed the contact with him.

“It’s my nickname for you. You hover, like a bird of prey. I have been calling you like that since the beginnings.”

He smiled and decided to tackle the more pressing question he had for her, his heart started racing. He had found out from the phone and not from her. He took a deep breath “I know…” he whispered and she looked up at him with curiosity “I was going through the text messages we exchanged and I found the one where you sent me a picture of our baby.”

Aelin gasped “I didn’t tell you because it would have been too much and you already have enough to deal with.” She was trying to protect him. She had been dying to tell him but for a moment she had put her desires aside and thought about him, how he would react at the news.

“How far along are you?”

“12 weeks. I am just at the end of my first trimester.” And he saw her lift her scrub and could see the slight hint of a bump “peanut, this is dad. Dad, this is peanut.”

Rowan sighed heavily “what if…” how could he explain his fears to her without crushing her? “What if the person I become is not the husband you remember? I don’t know when I will get my memories back. And when I do? Will it still be me or a brand new person with some jumbled up memories? What if you realise you can’t live with a version of me that is just a bad copy of the original?” He was terrified at the idea. 

“To whatever end.” She whispered “that’s the promise we shared on our wedding day. We will go through life together no matter what. Together.” Aelin sniffled loudly “we already went through a lot in seven years of marriage. Two miscarriages that shook us to the core. But we survived. Our marriage survived.” She took his hand feeling the need to a contact with him to dispel the fears in her heart “we will survive this as well.” She was now sobbing and Rowan had no idea how to console her. He had grabbed her hand briefly but still did not feel comfortable enough for contact with her.

“Sorry, it’s the hormones.”

“Aelin, you should move on. Find someone—” but Aelin did not let him finish “Rowan Whitethorn, please tell me you have not just suggested me to leave you.” She stood and shouted at him furious that he could even think about something so outrageous.

“I am not leaving you for another man. You are my husband.” She felt anger rising at the idea he might suggest such thing. It broke her heart that he would give up like that. 

“What if I don’t want to be your husband? Have you thought about me? I am trapped in a life I don’t recognise.” His tone matched hers and at his words Aelin felt her heart break. She took a step away from him.

“You come here and tell me all those thing about our life. Am I supposed to accept them without question and jump back in my old life?”

She did not answer him. Aelin just ran out of the room, heavy tears streaming down her cheeks. And when nausea hit she ran for the toilets and emptied her stomach.

She sat on the floor for a time that felt endless until she got paged and had to force herself to go back to work.

***

Rowan closed his eyes and he collapsed back on the pillow. His soul ached at the words he had said to Aelin. Why did he tell her something he did not believe himself? He was confused and utterly overwhelmed. He had so many questions and he had reacted in the worst possible way. But he was scared of not being able to be enough for her, to transform into a copy she might not like. They had kids to think about too. What if he was going to destroy a family? They deserved better than him.

Waking up and not remembering anything of his life had been terrifying. But that woman, his wife, was willing to take him back no matter what. She was ready to show him a way to find himself again. 

He took his mobile and texted her as soon as he figured out how to do it I am sorry for what I said. I am really scared.

Rowan placed the phone on the nightstand and lay down. He felt exhausted and when he closed his eyes, sleep caught him in his arms.

***

Rowan was standing in front of a crowd. He was in what looked like a ballroom inside and old building. The guests were all dressed up nicely and so was he. At his side there was a blonde man grinning happily.

As soon as the music started he turned his head and saw two dark-haired women entering the venue  and slowly proceed along the aisle in his direction. His gazed drifted away from them as soon as he spotted Aelin at the entrance. She was dressed in the most amazing light blue dress and she looked stunning. He felt like the luckiest man alive. Aelin had chosen him.

She stopped in front of him and he mouthed the words I love you to her. The officiant proceeded with the ceremony until it was time to exchange their vows and he went first.

“Aelin, my heart, once we set our hate aside you became my best friend and then my soulmate and soon I will be able to call you my wife as well. I am ready to face this new adventure together and stay at your side, no matter what. To whatever end, fireheart.”

By the time he finished she was in tears and it took her a moment to compose herself.

“Rowan, my buzzard, life can be unpredictable and cruel, but as long as I have you at my side I know I can survive anything. You are my rock. I am looking forward to our new adventure together. I love you, to whatever end.”

Rowan kissed her not even waiting for the right moment.

“Rowan Whitethorn, do you take Aelin Galathynius as you wife. Promise to respect her and cherish the time you will have together? To love her for better for worse, in sickness and in health till death do you part?”

“I do.” Said Rowan never averting his green eyes from her.

“Aelin Galathynius, do you take Rowan Whitethorn as your husband and promise to walk the path of life at his side. To love him for better or for worse, in sickness and in health till death do you part?”

“I do.” Tears of joy streamed down her face.

A moment later the scent of flowers had gone and Rowan awoke abruptly and the smell of disinfectant hit him.

He had been dreaming again. Their wedding apparently. They had been so happy and he could not remove from his mind Aelin’s stunning smile.

Frantically he grabbed his phone and sadness hit him when he noticed there was no answer from Aelin.

What had he done?

***

That night when Aelin got back home she looked for comfort in her mother’s arms first. She had told her all that happened at the hospital and Rowan’s words. Evalin had let her cry until she was spent.

When bed time came she went for her bedroom and found her bed already occupied by her two terrors. She changed in her pyjama and climbed in bed. Gently she pulled Freyja to her chest and inhaled deeply her scent. As if on instinct, just like his father, Thomas adjusted and moved to her snuggling closer. A pair of green eyes set on her “go back to sleep my love.” She kissed his blonde hair.

“I miss dad.” He said moving even closer and Aelin wrapped her arms around her two children “I miss him too, Tom.”

“When is he coming back?”

“Soon.” She brushed his hair “now sleep, okay?”

“I love you, mum.”

Aelin barely stopped the tears “I love you too.”

She closed her eyes and cried herself to sleep.

[yoonieper]

Pecattiphilia— Prologue | PJM

Pecattiphilia is the sexual arousal from performing an act one believes is a sin.

✽ Pairing: Jimin x Reader

✽ Genre: Angel Au, angst, future fluff, future smut

✽ Rated: A for A W A K E [❅]

✽ Warnings: This series will include discussion of religious aspects such as the afterlife and concepts of heaven and hell (There are no direct ties to any specific religion besides the mention of angels and demons— all aspects of religion was created by me for this series), this series includes a lot of violence (sometimes graphic depictions) and possible gore

✽ Chapter Specific Warnings: Character death(ish), car crash, sad sad emotions, a bit of nakey (sfw), things get pretty intimate (sfw), is Jimin really an angel…?

✽ Word Count: 13.3k

✽ Summary: Jimin is sent to watch over you and as the years go by he gets more and more curious and sometimes just wishes he could get to know you. But he knows that’s forbidden. However, a freak accident somehow causes Jimin and your eyes to meet for the first time with purpose. He knows it shouldn’t happen but he doesn’t want to break away. He wants you to look at him, wants you to touch him, wants you to be with him. The problem is none of this should have happened in the first place… what’s happening to him?

✽ Author’s Note: It’s a sad one y’all I’m sorry :,)

✽ Betas: Thank you to @heejinnien and @nightshadevinter for helping me with this!!

No reposting, modifying. Translating is not allowed unless given explicit permission. Thank you so much : D

main masterlist ✩ series masterlist » next chapter

As the door closed behind John, he took a long deep breath, letting the stresses of the day all out once. Today has been a long day to say the least. Being bossed around and yelled at for an entire morning and afternoon can take a toll on anyone, but after years of working with this company, he just felt exhausted. So fucking tired.

The minute he got a break he finally got the courage to start looking for another job. He was going to have to talk to Ana— his lovely wife— when he got home because he just couldn’t do this anymore. She was a lovely woman and would likely understand, as she had been getting an earful of all his work troubles ever since he started working there. This step likely wouldn’t have come as a surprise.

He sighed and pulled out of the parking lot.

Speaking of his wife, he couldn’t wait to get home. He’d been working overtime for a little while now and he hasn't been able to spend as much time with her or their two kids. But now it was finally the weekend and he had some time to breathe again.

He just couldn’t wait to see them.

John smiled brightly for the first time all week. Maybe a movie night with the family today? Maybe Ana will plan something with his kids? Maybe he and Chris could get back to trying out that new bike he got for Christmas? Ana did say she had wanted to plan a mommy and daughter day with Stacey.

While John was planning his delightful weekend unknown to him was a certain someone sitting in the backseat.

Jimin looked down at the device, that feeling of dread creeping up everytime he got this news. It was close to time.

He was all ready, the black ceremonial robes covered his body, and on the screen a countdown getting down to minutes now. This was his job, and he’d done this more times than he can count but it always hurts each and every time. It was even worse in the fact that John was so young, only 38 years old and he’s about to end it.

Fate was cruel in that sense. Of course he’d thought about it before, thought about just not doing it. But as he’d been taught ever since he can remember, that was a fate worse than him intervening.

Jimin looked down again. 3:01 popping up in big blue numbers. He sighed and pulled his hood over. Suddenly he was no longer in the backseat of the car, but flying high in the sky, getting an aerial shot of John’s car weaving around the mountains of the city.

John hummed along to the pop tunes that were playing on the radio.

“What’s for dinner?” He wondered aloud to himself. He hated that he had forgotten to call Ana before he left about having spaghetti tonight.

He remembered vaguely about her saying she was gonna make this new casserole, but he couldn’t help wish it was that pasta dish. He’d just have to remember to tell her tomorrow.

John looked up in the rear view and was shocked when he saw a black hooded figure sitting. He quickly rubbed his eyes and looked again. It was gone.

He sighed.

He must have been really tired, he’d started to become delusional.

Jimin looked down at the timer again. 13 seconds.

From here he could see the semi truck just a little ways away begin to lose control. Everything for him slowed down slightly. He saw the truck coming closer and closer, unknown to John who hadn’t turned around the corner yet.

It happened in an instant. The truck started to lose even more control as it turned the corner. It was then that John finally noticed and tried to move out of the way, but because they were on a corner and it was on a mountain is what ultimately sent him flying off the edge.

But John was not in the car to see this all happen. He was standing by the road and watched first hand as his car went flying off the side of the mountain. He couldn’t seem to move as he saw the car tumble farther and farther down.

He looked around him curiously wondering what exactly just happened.

Wasn’t he just in there?

John turned around to see the truck now laying on its side. He quickly ran over to the passenger side and was about to help the driver when his hands passed right through the truck.

John’s eyes widened. He tried again and no matter how hard he concentrated, his hands kept disappearing in the machinery.

He turned to call for help but standing right behind him was a hooded figure. At first he just stared, a little confused, but as the figure ominously approached suddenly fear consumed him and sent him screaming and running away.

“SOMEONE HELP ME PLEASE” He begged, but ended up tripping on his shoes and falling over.

John turned around to see the figure approaching him quickly enough that he couldn’t exactly run away even if he wanted to. John just stared as he watched preparing for his doom.

The figure's hood was black but gold designs accented the cloak. In one of its hands, it held what appeared to be a scythe. John felt his blood run cold as the figure just stared. John couldn’t even see its face, but when the figure stopped right in front of his face, eyes closed, prepared for the worse.

John waited and waited for it to come but it never did. He hesitantly opened his eyes to see the figure still standing there. It bent to his level.

“John…” he heard a sweet voice say.

He was still warry. “What do you want from me?! And what… what’s happening to me!” He cried, so confused and honestly terrified.

The figure took off their hood and John was utterly shocked to see one of the most beautiful people he’d ever seen. The man’s shimmering light brown eyes stared right into his soul, and his blue hair seemed to frame his face perfectly. He was ethereal.

“Who are you?” He asked barely above a whisper.

He sighed and sat down on the ground right in front of him.

“I’m sorry… this is always the worst part” he turned toward John, hating that scared look on his face “I’m Jimin… I guess I’m something like your guardian angel.”

Jimin saw that look on his face as he slowly took in his words.

John suddenly laughed “You know, I would have thought you were crazy if my hands didn’t go through that damn truck.” Jimin though saw the tears forming in his eyes.

“Does it mean that…?” John turned toward where his car ran off the road. Jimin nodded slowly knowing this news was not going to be easy. It never was in sudden cases like this.

John hurriedly got up and began pacing. “My kids, my wife, my family I—“ That’s when he just broke down, but Jimin got right up and pulled him into a hug.

“I can’t just… I can’t just leave them” He sobbed into Jimin’s robes. Jimin could feel his pain— it was a weird process, watching over someone for 18 years, sometimes more or less. He liked to think the minute he was transferred over to his next human, that a special bond, connection, was formed.

John’s pain was his own. He knew how this news would devastate his family and it just broke him inside to see him like this.

“Wait… you, you couldn’t do anything?” John exclaimed, suddenly enraged. “You couldn’t have made me, I don’t know, not run off the road.” Jimin could see the rage and he hated himself too for it.

“There’s rules, laws that I must obey. I protected you for 18 years, stopped a lot of bad incidents that could have happened to you. There just comes a time and place that I must step back as your guardian and become your guide.” Jimin laid out plainly. It was just the cruel fate of the universe.

John’s face softened slightly but instead it was replaced with more sadness. “You said 18 years… I’m 38?” He questioned. Jimin led John closer to the edge so they could get a better look at the setting sun. The sky was a fiery orange, the feathery clouds accented its beauty. The view was breathtaking.

“Can you answer my question or um are you… are you…” John’s voice was starting to break but Jimin luckily jumped in. “I’ll answer anything you would like to ask, there’s no need to rush. We can stay as long as you need to.” He reaffirmed.

John smiled weakly, relieved at the answer. “So can I ask why you can do that? I mean tell me everything, like where are we going, what is going to happen to me that you’re able to tell me everything?” He panicked, his gaze still on the sun. Jimin sighed and looked around “That's a question that takes some explaining to answer… we should probably go somewhere else before the police show up.”

John looked at him confused “Before the police show up..? Can they see us or something?” Jimin shook his head “No one can see us. It’s just… after doing this for so long, I’ve just noticed it’s easier to move on if you don’t see yourself like that.”

John’s attention went right back to where his car ran off the road and he understood. It would mess with his head too much seeing his lifeless body.

“Let’s go to the park, we can talk there.” John tried to smile. Jimin knew of its significance, he knew how much this park played a role in his life as a place of comfort whenever things got too much.

Jimin smiled. “Your wish is my command” He went over to grab his scythe that was lying on the ground. John watched curiously as he twisted some things on the handle and then the blade was gone and the bottom of it suddenly popped out. John watched, eyebrows furrowed, as Jimin pulled it until it was poking him in the stomach.

“That should be about good,” he said aloud to himself. “Um… Jimin—”

“You see that handle down there?” Jimin interrupted. John looked down and indeed near the end of the pole was a handle. John nodded hesitantly “Grab onto it.”

“Jimin what are we doing?” John asked, sliding his hand into the handle. “We’re going to the park! Now, did you want me to get you there quickly or did you wanna take your time.” John turned toward the sun that was still setting.

“Go as slow as you can, I wanna be able to enjoy this view one last time.” He smiled sadly.

Jimin nodded and hocked his own hand in the pole at the other end. “Ok hold on tight, this is practice for later.”

“Practice? Practice for…?”

Jimin smiled. “I’ll explain it at the park.” John was confused but he trusted him oddly enough. He couldn’t explain it, it just felt right.

John watched with amazement as suddenly a pair of wings appeared from his back out of thin air. That was one of the least things to focus on in this situation because, just like the person who bore them, the wings seemed to defy all realms of beauty. The wings had an interesting glimmer to them, not exactly sparkles, nor were they lit up necessarily. The closest comparison John could probably make was as if he were witnessing the Northern Lights contained into the white feathers.

He vaguely heard Jimin yell for him to hang on tight again before he was suddenly being lifted up higher. He watched in amazement as his feet began to dangle, no longer touching the ground. John just looked up at Jimin with a fond smile on his face.

It only made sense that he was dead.

No one could exist in real life or even his own imagination and be as beautiful as the creature flying above him. No one.

John quickly looked down trying to shake himself out of his daze and enjoy the setting sun over the horizon. He admired the cityscape that was far below where they flew. He watched intently at the twinkling lights coming from various buildings, the little cars as they sped along the road, and the people who walked but all had no idea what was taking place above them.

He felt the tears come again.

Life was not fair. Everyone knows that as soon as they’re born, but John in this situation couldn’t help but think about that quote and take it to heart.

This wasn’t fair at all.

As Jimin promised the ride was slow and it took them a good little while before the Springfield park was coming into view. Jimin set him down gently before he retracted the pole, becoming a scythe once again, and joining John beside him.

There was an awkward silence at first as they began to walk along the trails of the park; Jimin felt his sadness and knew it was best to just let him take everything in.

He’d been doing this for so long he’s seen so many different types of reactions to his very existence. He’d had people who would go with him so willingly and others who he literally had to condemn because it was so bad. People like John in some cases hated him with every fiber of their being so he’s learned to just flow with them and be as accommodating as he can.

“So… about those questions” John finally breathed.

“I’ll answer anything you want me to.”

He nodded. “I actually wanted to know more about you…”

Jimin was a bit shocked with this being the first thing he wanted to talk about. “What do you want to know?”

“Everything… I mean.” John slowed his roll knowing he was being a bit too much “Like um, is this pretty much all you do? Watching over people and stuff…”

Jimin shook his head and laughed a little “No, I have a lot more responsibilities.” He looked over at John and saw that face that was practically begging him to continue. “I guess that would require me to explain our sector a little more…” Jimin led John over to a bench that was facing the sun that was now nearly gone from the sky.

“Your concept of us here on Earth is not exactly correct.” Jimin reached into the pocket of his robes, “Wanna see something cool?” He smiled. John nodded eagerly.

Jimin pulled out a gold cylinder. John examined it closely as Jimin handed it over to him. The tube of shorts was divided into 9 sections, the one in the middle was the largest and had writing he couldn’t quite understand, but the other 8 had pictures and different gems. “What is it?” He asked, his curiosity hitting an all time high.

“I kill things…” John's eyes widened at his words. For some reason he couldn’t quite picture this sweet person killing…? “Things that if I or any of us didn’t, would cause the end of the universe.” He nodded.

“What’s this for?” He asked, holding the gold cylinder. “Oh right.” Jimin got up and grabbed the cylinder out of his hands. John hardly noticed but he watched as Jimin quickly turned the picture sections on the cylinder before a bright white light came from one end and formed a familiar shape. It was a sword.

“It can make other things but it’s basically a handle” Jimin easily stuck the sword into the ground letting John know just how dangerous that light was.

“The easiest way I’ve found to explain our sector to humans as… think about us as just a higher up branch of the military— serving to protect not a country, but humanity as a whole.” John nodded, somewhat picturing it. “Um, If we aren’t just out in the field, we have other duties such as managing the sector, teaching new teams, missions, and wait for it… we also take breaks sometimes…”

John laughed “I’m not even going to try and understand what that other stuff was, but you take breaks? Where would an angel vacation?” He asked jokingly, but was genuinely curious about the answer.

“Here on Earth.”

“Really?”

Jimin nodded. “It’s nice to take a break and enjoy the world that we’re protecting” John hummed at that answer “Wait… does that mean that.” Jimin smiled knowing exactly what he was trying to ask. “You never know who that person is you sit beside… you never know where they might come from.”

John awed. “Have I ever met an angel before?”

“Now I can’t tell you that, but there’s a lot more of us down here than you might be thinking.”

“Well um, I guess next, about you saying you’ve only been with me for 18 years even though I’m 38…?” Jimin’s face lit up remembering the question. “Right… basically there’s two types of angels. One that’s always been an angel and the other is a human reincarnate. The first type are sent down to look after humans during their childhood, which up there is up till the age of 20. And the human reincarnate will then take its place and look after that human until their end. This is simply because children tend to be a lot more impressionable to the world around them, making them vulnerable to those things that I kill. They’re more powerful in the sense they have better control of their abilities and can do a lot more without losing control, making them better protectors. I’m that human reincarnate so yeah, I’ve only been with you 18 years…”

John’s brain started to hurt with all this new information and all the new questions he had “Wait wait wait… 2 types, children, control, you saying you were human at some point?” Jimin laughed slightly realizing that may have been a lot. “Yes, yes, yes, and yes”

“So wait… about you being human?”

Jimin nearly fell off the bench from laughing. “That’s what they tell me at least”

“You don’t know?”

Jimin shook his head “I don’t have any memories before I was this, but I was just like you at some point in time.”

“Huh? Is that what’s happening to me after...?”

“No, it’s pretty rare for that to happen. I can’t give you a definitive answer though as I’m not exactly sure myself what’s to become of you.”

“What about umm… just what happens next after we’re done talking.”

Jimin nodded realizing it's come to this difficult conversation.

“I’ll be taking you to get judged. I’ll explain more about that when we get there, but I must warn you of the path it takes to get there. It’s not painful nor long, it's just um… I honestly have no better word than a mindfuck; it definitely plays with your psyche.”

Ignoring the fact that this beautiful angelic creature just said mindfuck, John was honestly getting scared.

“But don’t worry though, as long as you stay with me and don’t let go no matter what you see or hear, you’ll be alright.” His words only made him even more nervous.

Jimin could sense the fear.

“Before we go though I wanna be honest. It was me?”

John turned towards him, obviously confused by his sudden confession.

“I killed you.”

“What?”

“The crash would have killed you no matter what happened, but technically you were dead before your car flew off the edge.”

“Why?” John asked, simply not really processing these words

“To prevent your suffering. I didn’t want you scared or in pain. I was protecting you from the worst of it.”

“And you're telling me this because…?”

“It usually comes up on that path I was telling you. I just didn’t want you to think I was trying to hide that fact from you.”

John was quickly realizing something the longer he talked with Jimin. He definitely had to be human at some point in time. He didn’t know how to explain it, but something about him was oddly human, in the good and bad ways.

It was honestly a little comforting if he was being honest…

“I’m just curious, do you know everything?” Jimin looked at him strangely, wondering how that was what followed right after he just confessed to murder.

“I’m all knowing, in the here and now if that’s what you’re asking…”

“And what does that mean?”

“I don’t have any knowledge of the future, and I simply know as much as you do right here of the past. In the now though I can tell you everything that’s happening.”

“Can you tell me about my family? How are they…?”

Jimin frowned.

“They don’t know yet. The police have now arrived at the scene. The driver of the truck is fine, some mild injuries and a concussion, but he will be ok. The authorities are now trying to recover your car.”

“I understand we need to leave but can you take me to them? I wanna see them one last time if that’s alright.”

Jimin got up the bench, grabbing his handle and his scythe again. “It’s best we get going then. The police will find you soon, and I don’t think it’s a good idea to see your family like that before we leave for good.” John nodded understanding the urgency.

Jimin set them up quickly and they were taking to the skies once again in no time. It was during this ride that John really got a taste of some of Jimin’s power. They were quick, so quick that the world around him seemed to blur and bend around the pair. The thing was, John could tell that this wasn’t the fastest he could go; no, this was just the beginning.

In times of mental anguish, John found himself traveling to the park, always having found the brief interruption of nature the best place to clear his head and think in a city in California. He grew up near the park, being an easy 5 minute walk from his house, but after moving to a place on the other side of the city, it would take commitment and a long drive if he wanted to come here now. It was a good 45 minutes if the traffic was bad, but with Jimin, there were no lingering stoplights to hold him, there wasn’t a traffic jam that would keep him in place. It was the sky and he ruled over it.

As Jimin set him down it took a little while before the world seemed to stop spinning. He didn’t know exactly what happened but as things began to focus once more the house he had been so desperate to come back to was right in front of him.

John felt his eyes quickly welling up as he rushed inside. It was a cruel reminder of what happened when he easily passed right through the door.

He was dead.

John looked around. His wife was in the kitchen fixing that new casserole dish he knew she was making tonight, his son was on the couch watching tv, and his daughter playing with her dolls on the floor right in front of him.

The emotions just came pouring out. He wanted to hold them again, be with them again. The more he thought about it the worse he felt. He fell to his knees.

He would never be able to finish teaching his son how to ride that bike he got for Christmas, he would never be there for his daughter the day she would walk down the aisle. He would never be there for graduations, anymore birthdays, grandkids? All those important life stages that he should be there for? And his wife…. Ana? She would have to go through this all alone….

As John was pouring his heart out he felt a presence to his side and there was Jimin standing right next to him.

Nothing was said as he dropped next to him and was there to be the shoulder to cry on.

It was a surreal experience. While he was in the middle of the living crying his eyes out he family was carrying on, unknown to the commotion that’s happening right in front of them.

“Mom, when’s dad gonna be home?” His son asked innocently as he headed into the kitchen. John froze hearing his voice and knowing the answer to his question.

Never.

Through the tears that clouded his vision he could see the concerned look on his wife’s face as she glanced over at the clock. “He should be here any minute now…” But he knew his wife all too well and could hear the worry in her voice.

John just cried harder into Jimin’s robe, knowing the impact this news would have on his family.

“John, I don’t wanna rush you but the police have found your body… they’re searching for a wallet so they can get in touch with your family. It’s best if we leave soon.” He sighed. Jimin hated rushing. Jimin could feel the pain John was going through literally and as a friend who has been with him for a good part of his life. He couldn’t stop the tears that also came as John sobbed in his arms, but he didn’t let it show. He had to be the strong one in a time like this and as much as his heart ached, he had to be there for John.

He eventually got up and went around to his kids and wife and kissed them all on the heads as he whispered goodbyes.

As much as he didn’t wanna rush this either, he knew it would absolutely destroy him staying with them long enough for him to see them hear the news. No, he would probably never be able to leave with Jimin. The pain of seeing his concerned wife almost brought him to try and run away from this but he stayed. For some odd reason as much as he valued Jimin’s company as he was going through all this… he was oddly intimidating. John couldn’t really explain it, his face and personality was so inviting that it really confused him why he had this odd feeling about him. I mean if you think about it, who wouldn’t be a little scared? John just met a powerful being who seems to have no limits and who had admitted to being the cause of his death. No, he had every right to fear this creature.

It was just so weird because his face and his presence were totally different from each other.

As much as he wanted to be with his family, he feared a fate worse than just willingly going with him.

Jimin smiled warmly as he led John back outside.

It’s time.

I know. I just wish he had more time.

It’s alright. It doesn’t stop what must be done.

I know.

“Ok… like I mentioned earlier this is not easy. Please just look at me, don’t listen to anything that calls out to you. I’m Jimin and you’re John. Got it?”

John nodded.

He started stretching out the pole from his scythe again, this time going a much farther distance than he did when they were going to and fro from the park.

“I’ll explain what happens next later just….” Jimin looked up, meeting his eyes “Just stay with me ok.”

John felt his heart beating out of his chest. The only comfort in this situation was the fact he had already died once, what’s the worst thing that could happen?

…

Is there something worse?

Part of him was tempted to ask Jimin, but he quickly decided against it because, sometimes ignorance is bliss.

“Grab on!” Jimin motioned toward the end of the pole. It made John a little scared seeing the peculiar amount of distance there was put between them…

But he grabbed on, just like he was told to.

Jimin weakly smiled before doing something John never once saw coming. A ring appeared above his head. It shined bright like the light that made Jimin’s sword but it was different in the sense that it was…. real? It was tangible, like he could reach out and easily grab it. It looked to be made of gold, and even from the distance that John was standing he could see the pretty engravings on the ring.

Wow.

What was an even bigger shock was when Jimin did exactly what he was thinking about. He reached above his head and the ring easily came down, what came next was when he really had him losing his shit. Jimin, with one firm toss, threw the ring into the air. As he got higher it expanded from the size of maybe a large bowl into being able to fit a car through the hoop. It stopped for a second before it began to spin and suddenly a black void appeared in the middle.

John’s eyes were boring into the void and was taken aback when Jimin started flying and lifting them both toward the ring filled with endless black.

John thought they were headed straight in, but Jimin stopped right in front.

“Hold on tight ok? No matter what, don't let go.”

And with that, at a speed John couldn’t even comprehend, Jimin flew them into the void. John looked down seeing the whole that was made coming smaller and smaller and the black consuming them. Until it wasn’t. Suddenly John was seeing an aerial view of the earth. They were in space. But as Jimin kept flying another dark void was in front of them and they were quickly being consumed by it.

Now at first John was a little confused by Jimin’s warnings as everything so far had either been beautiful or just darkness. He can survive that. No when they went into the next void everything started to make sense. His warnings and urges to hold on.

Immediately he was hit with a powerful gust of wind. He wasn’t sure if it was because of Jimin’s speed or the void pushing back on him but it suddenly became hard to open his eyes.

Then the voices started…

“Dad?” It was his son. “Don’t go…” it was faint but as someone who thought he just said goodbye to his son forever, it was enough to break him.

Then the sobbing.

In the blackness suddenly appeared the image of Ana getting the call about his passing. The scream she let out had his mind going fuzzy.

He wanted to go back to his family.

He was then hit with a glimpse into the future, he saw the despair that his family goes through now that he wasn’t there anymore. Saw the suffering his wife will go through and how his children barely remembered him because they were so young.

He needed to go back to his family.

But… Jimin.

“Do you really trust him dad? He was the one who killed you,” cried his son.

He did.

“Dad, you don’t even know what he is…” His daughter chimed in.

He’s Jimin.

“Are you sure?” His whole family seemed to scream.

The void transformed. It was alive. The endlessness seemed to move and breathe as they traveled. But like Jimin said it would, it turned into what only could be described as a mindfuck.

It was psychedelic almost. Patterns and colors that were unheard of to him just seemed to appear as the black turned into an entity itself.

The patterns and colors began to form columns and if he looked ahead…. there was something.

Where’s Jimin? His consciousness pointed out.

The pole that was supposed to be connecting them seemed to disappear in the murkiness of the patterns. He could just be floating here for all he knows.

“L O O K.” A voice completely unknown to him, had his eyes boring into the thing that seemed to be coming closer.

He may be dead but he felt his heart stop.

Rings that all seemed to spin in different directions that were filled with eyes. Two pairs of wings, one pointing up and the other down, flew without any movement. And right in the middle… right in the middle was Jimin. But different. His eyes glowed and his hair now turned a stark white.

But that was only for a second before Jimin in the middle disappeared only leaving the horror of the spinning wheels with eyes.

John looked down hoping that this was some illusion but the other end of the pole was floating right in the middle of the creature. No what he saw before wasn’t Jimin… this was Jimin.

But then he got a flash of him, the things Jimin did, the gruesome acts he claims was to protect humanity. Why did they just look like ordinary people?

“Don’t go with this monster daddy, come back to us” His daughter pleaded before a mantra of voices began pleading for him to “stay” or how it would be so easy as to just “let go.”

They were practically screaming in his ears.

The only thing keeping himself holding onto the handle was Jimin’s words.

But can he really trust him?

Maybe it would be easier to just let go…

Meanwhile Jimin was experiencing the opposite of what John was going through. His celestial vision allowed him to see past all the craziness of this and to him he was just flying through a storm. As they were approaching the wall Jimin started hoping that John was still at the other end.

He’s forbidden to look behind him until they pass it.

He’s lost some souls along the way. Everyone does at some point, but it’s just such a disappointment each time it happens.

Jimin rushed through the wall of cloud and at the other side was still one of the prettiest sights he’d ever seen. The sky was pink and orange as if the sun was setting and cute white fluffy clouds decorated it all over. A little past the entrance was a path that’s meant to lead them both to what’s next.

Jimin flew up a little higher before finally turning back to finally see if John was able to make it through. He grabbed a hold of the pole and pushed a button that began to make it retract.

He held his breath as it got shorter and shorter. The relief he felt when he saw a head poke through the clouds. In cases like John’s they are the most likely to fail as their departure was quick and they may still have some remaining ties to their life.

Jimin smiled and gently placed him on the path and flew down to meet him.

“You did it!” He went in for a high five but the terrified look on John’s face told him it came at a cost.

“John—“

“What are you?” It came out quickly and it took Jimin aback.

“I saw you. The real you…” John continued, still weary of him.

“And… Did you like what you saw?” The question seemed to ring in John’s ears. That’s not what he was expecting to come out of his mouth….

“I—“

“You really thought this is what I looked like?”

…

“We appear in this form simply because we figure this would be a better sight to see than what you saw John. Or did you want me to change?”

He wants it.

I know. It’s a bit pathetic.

He’s still feeling the effects

You’re probably right.

“No-No I saw you, you killing those—”

“Demons. John, you're fine.”

What Jimin’s learned through his time doing this is that sometimes they need a good slap to snap out of it.

He waved his finger and suddenly John was on his feet again. “Wake up, John, it’s me, Jimin remember?”

“You killed me,” he sobbed

“Yes. Did you want to suffer?”

“No.”

“John, wake up.”

“My family Jimin, they need me, I have to—“ John attempted to run but Jimin held him right in place.

I’m annoyed

Me too.

A loud smack sound reverberated through the space. A nice red imprint left on John’s right cheek.

Sometimes it’s better to take that saying literally.

“Better?”

John stared at him for a second before nodding slowly, that dead look in his eyes now replaced with embarrassment. Jimin sighed and smiled slightly.

“Good, we’ve got places to be. You promise you won’t go running off the edge?” John mumbled a yes before Jimin finally let him go.

He grabbed a hold of his hand and began leading down what seemed to be a never ending pathway. There was a weird silence between the two at first. John was too embarrassed by his actions to get himself to say anything but he was also just thinking. It’s so weird. Jimin went from the sweetest angel he claims to be, but then there’s just moments where that only seems to be a facade.

Who was the real Jimin?

He had so many questions….

“Jimin… are you really an Angel?” John blurted out without thinking too much. Jimin turned around to face him.

“Of course I am, like I said before, you humans have an expectation that may not be the reality. We are what we are, I am what I am.”

“What would have happened if I let go?”

Jimin sighed. “You would have been deemed unfit.” He could sense John’s confusion. “Technically I could have taken you straight here, but this is used as a test to make sure you can remain part of the cycle. If you’re deemed unfit you get sent straight to ummm, sector H.E.L.L or in other words, eternal damnation.” Jimin could feel the shock even from here.

“Wait so that means…”

“Yes and that's why it's important to listen to me.”

John tries to recover from this news but for some reason the fact that he was so close to just letting go, honestly if he had spent a second longer he fears where he would be right now. Jimin could hear the panic going around in John’s head and went back to pat his back lightly.

“It’s alright. You’re here with me now. You’ll be fine.”

More silence.

“So um… where are we going next then….?”

“You’re going to get judged.”

“Judged?”

Jimin stopped and turned around again. “Yep~ They’re determining your future. There’s 5 possibilities: 1) You're sent to H.E.A.V.E.N— it’s similar to what it’s perceived as on Earth, it’s basically your own little eternal paradise for as long as you would like to stay. 2) You’re reincarnated, which that’s the most likely thing that will happen. 3) You’re sent to H.E.L.L— which is if your soul has been corrupted to a point that you’re considered a risk. 4) You join back in the cycle— but that’s only if you’re ready. 5) There’s the rare chance you become like me” Jimin could see the confusion and the questions that were amassing in his brain.

“So um first… why is reincarnation the most likely outcome?”

“You're not done. Just because your life as John Sawyer ended doesn’t mean you’re ready to end yet. Most souls can live hundreds of lives before they become exhausted. Outcomes 1 and 4 are in the case that you are. 1 is if your desire to live exists slightly, but not enough to go through it again. 4 is if you’re done done. Option 4 is still on the table even if 1 is picked at first. Eventually everyone gets too tired to go on…”

John nodded, understanding it a little better.

“And about 4, you’ve mentioned this before but you keep mentioning a cycle…?”

“Ahhh yes. Basically the cycle of time. When souls enter the door they are dismantled and join the rest to eventually form a new one one day. Time is necessarily linear here so we see it as a cycle of birth, death, and rebirth.”

“Wow…” was all John could seem to say. This was honestly so fascinating. “Do you know what my outcome will be?”

Jimin shook his head “Nope, I’m going to find out just like you.”

Hmmm. What did he think? He wanted to live…

“Do you think I could end up with outcome 3?”

“Most likely no. That honestly depends if I’ve done my job well enough, and lucky for you I’m one of the best at my job. You should be fine.”

“Have you had anyone end up with outcome 3?”

“Of course I have, whether it was losing them in the test, me failing, or just because they were assholes. I can’t really do much if that’s the case. Don’t worry though, you’re a good man John, you’ll be alright.”

That’s a relief.

But what about 1 & 4…

“Why would someone get exhausted and pick 1 & 4?”

“The longer you stay up here the less and less you become John Sawyer and the more you become your soul that’s likely lived many lives. You will know, nothing is forced, it would be your decision. You’ll know when we get there.”

“Jimin.”

“Yes?”

“Do you wanna live?”

He stopped dead in his tracks.

“I know you said you were human at some point. I mean, after hanging around on earth for so long you never get that urge.”

Jimin turned around with a faint smile on his face. He sat down, his feet dangling off the path and motioned John to follow him. The storm below continued to rage and for a while it was just the sound of thunder and the light breeze that blew on them slightly.

“I’ve seen a lot over the time I’ve been acting as a guardian. I’ve seen some pretty terrible people but also some good ones. I don’t despise humans but life is so fragile… I don’t necessarily want to live, I just… I wanna know what type of people I was. I mean, I was the rare exception and because this” he motioned down to himself “I must have been something…. I mean, I wonder who my friends were before, my family, kids…. what made them pick me? I don’t have any memory and if anything that’s what I crave. I want my memories back.”

“A powerful being such as yourself can’t just… remember?”

Jimin laughed slightly “No… there’s probably no way I’ll ever get to remember. In order for me to become me they need to do things… I’m not even the same person with the same soul anymore. I have no way to pick me out as I don’t have any concept of a before.”

John gently caressed his back sensing that this was a difficult topic “I’m so—“

“No you're fine, besides I get to live vicariously through any of the humans I look after and make new memories. It’s fine, I’m fine.”

That’s a lie.

I’m fine.

You want something more.

I’m fine.

You’re not.

I said I’m fine.

Whatever you say.

“Anyway… enough about me. We have to get you judged.” Jimin got up and helped John up as well.

Jimin waved his hand and the clouds dissipated to reveal a large building in the far distance.

John looked at him confused. “Could you always do that?”

Jimin nodded “I knew you had questions. Come on, let’s go!”

Jimin quickly floated ahead… wait floated? It was only then that John realized that this whole time Jimin has been at least a few inches off the ground.

Huh?

It wasn’t long before they were standing in front of a large door.

Jimin turned toward John and snapped his fingers. Suddenly they were wearing suits.

“Ok, be calm.” He started fixing John’s suit slightly “They’re just going to assess you and—“ he was listening but at the same time he was distracted by the fact he was seeing Jimin in such regular attire— or regular considering what he is.

He looked good though

“Ok that’s the basics, from there it’s all about what they decide. I’ll be with you till the end so don’t worry, I’ll be cheering you on~ Ready?”

John was now focused on his eyes. They weren’t the brown ones he first saw, no, a warm sense of comfort filled his body as he looked deep into the light blue eyes that stared at him now.

Part of him wanted to ask about it but he quickly decided against it.

John quickly pulled Jimin into a hug “Thank you so much…” he was taken aback by the sudden display of affection but Jimin quickly melted in the hug and wrapped his arms around him.

“I’m sorry for earlier…”

“It’s fine, you were likely just still feeling the effects of the test.”

“I still feel bad I mean, you’re so nice, helping me deal with this and I—“

“John, it's fine.” Jimin smiled warmly, making the rambling apology suddenly clear and now there was just one thing he had to say.

“Thanks for looking after me. I don’t know exactly the struggles you’ve gone through, but thank you for taking me as far as you did. It’s been a pleasure knowing you.”

“Likewise!” Jimin exclaimed happily.

Jimin rested his hand on top of John’s shoulder and started walking him inside. The doors pushed open easily, not a finger was lifted as the room was revealed. John was shocked to see it mirror a courtroom. There were some slight differences though… where the judge would sit was raised up to surprising heights, a little raised platform also sat in the middle of the courtroom, but what was most compelling were the two doors that were at the back of the room. One decorated with pretty flowers and the other made of stone.

“John Sawyer?” He looked back at Jimin, now getting a little nervous, but Jimin beckoned him forward.

“Yes-Yes that’s me.”

“And Jimin, how have you been?”

John turned around to see a smile on Jimin’s face “Good, it’s nice to see you again R̵̮͍͈̻͎̞̘̟͆̈́̍̐̐̔͝ͅẹ̸̢̥̰̬̺̟̰̖̜̪̯͚̈́͗̒̌́̑ḓ̴̢̞͙̤͇̰͈͎̜̞̖̪̠̞̽͋̑̒͜ͅa̶̢͎̭̬̼̩̯̽̄͝ç̴̯̗͉̱̎̃̾̉͐̀͜ͅt̶̼͍̝̫̩͉̗̺̰̭̣̜̀́e̴͚͉͖͒̈́̋̆̃̓͋̈̂͆̆́̍̏̇̚d̵̦̔̈́͑͝!”

He heard an old hearty laugh. “John, please step onto the platform.” He did as he was told and made his way to the middle of the courtroom. It was then that he was finally seeing the “judge.” He was an older man who’s glasses hung low on the bridge of his nose, he looked so friendly and… normal? Too normal.

“Haha, young man. Our facility is built to ease this process for you, it’s supposed to be familiar.” John’s eyes widened.

“I know all,” he chuckled lightly.

“Anyway let’s proceed with this trial— Jimin you can just take a seat right there in the front.” Jimin signaled a thumbs up before steadily making his way to the front pew.

“John Sawyer… born November 14th 1960 and lived through April 17th 1999, is that correct?”

He still felt the pain of that end date. “Yes sir that’s correct.”

“Good. Now that that’s over let’s review the evidence...” Suddenly a projection showed up and started rolling. John awed realizing it was replaying his life.

They showed moments of his childhood that he has almost completely forgotten, they showed him aging up and living. When he first met Ana, when his son and daughter were born. It almost brought him to tears realizing that he was now leaving that life behind. He honestly did complain too much, if only he knew his life was going to be so short, he would have done more.

John though started looking confused when they started playing memories that weren’t his but were oddly familiar. He felt it, no they weren’t his but they were his. Just not John Sawyer.

“Do you remember, John?” The old guy asked. He nodded hesitantly. “It’s faint but I know it’s me.”

The old guy smiled “Look they’ve come to see your trial~” John turned around confused but was shocked to see his family sitting in one of the pews. He was this close to running to them when others started appearing one by one, different men and women that, like the memories, radiated familiarity.

It was his family. His entire family.

John felt his eyes welling up as the pews continued to fill. Why was he so happy? It was just so nice.

Unknown to John but as he continued to stare at the people appearing he was being judged, read, measured. A loud ding was the only reason why he turned back around again. In bright red letters were the words “NEW BEGINNINGS REINCARNATE.”

The old man smiled. “It looks like you’re being reincarnated John, congratulations!” He turned around to see Jimin clapping in the front row.

“R̵̮͍͈̻͎̞̘̟͆̈́̍̐̐̔͝ͅẹ̸̢̥̰̬̺̟̰̖̜̪̯͚̈́͗̒̌́̑ḓ̴̢̞͙̤͇̰͈͎̜̞̖̪̠̞̽͋̑̒͜ͅa̶̢͎̭̬̼̩̯̽̄͝ç̴̯̗͉̱̎̃̾̉͐̀͜ͅt̶̼͍̝̫̩͉̗̺̰̭̣̜̀́e̴͚͉͖͒̈́̋̆̃̓͋̈̂͆̆́̍̏̇̚d̵̦̔̈́͑͝!” The old man called out and a lady came through a separate door that was to the left of him but was originally hidden. John was a little stunned at her beauty. She adorned white silky fabrics that draped and decorated her delicate body. It reminded him almost of togas. “Please escort John.” The lady nodded at the request.

He snapped himself out of it and stepped off the platform to meet Jimin.

“This is it for me…” he sighed, making John’s heart drop at the news of them parting.

Jimin immediately noticed the frown. “Who knows though, maybe we’ll meet again one day…” he chuckled lightly, managing to get a smile out of him at least.

“Don’t worry, I know R̵̮͍͈̻͎̞̘̟͆̈́̍̐̐̔͝ͅẹ̸̢̥̰̬̺̟̰̖̜̪̯͚̈́͗̒̌́̑ḓ̴̢̞͙̤͇̰͈͎̜̞̖̪̠̞̽͋̑̒͜ͅa̶̢͎̭̬̼̩̯̽̄͝ç̴̯̗͉̱̎̃̾̉͐̀͜ͅt̶̼͍̝̫̩͉̗̺̰̭̣̜̀́e̴͚͉͖͒̈́̋̆̃̓͋̈̂͆̆́̍̏̇̚d̵̦̔̈́͑͝ and she’ll take great care of you, alright?” John nodded.

“Jimin, thank you,” he pulled him into a hug before quickly scurrying off to join R̵̮͍͈̻͎̞̘̟͆̈́̍̐̐̔͝ͅẹ̸̢̥̰̬̺̟̰̖̜̪̯͚̈́͗̒̌́̑ḓ̴̢̞͙̤͇̰͈͎̜̞̖̪̠̞̽͋̑̒͜ͅa̶̢͎̭̬̼̩̯̽̄͝ç̴̯̗͉̱̎̃̾̉͐̀͜ͅt̶̼͍̝̫̩͉̗̺̰̭̣̜̀́e̴͚͉͖͒̈́̋̆̃̓͋̈̂͆̆́̍̏̇̚d̵̦̔̈́͑͝. She happily greeted him and they walked toward the door. They chatted slightly before John waved and they disappeared behind the door.

Jimin sighed.

Another one done.

Yep…

Jimin quickly flew up to join the old man.

“Jimin hello!” He exclaimed happily. “Hey Anderson, how have you been?”

“Good, good, been overseeing a lot of these trials lately, kinda tired but you know.” They both laughed knowing their sector.

“What about you? Where are you off to now?”

“I was actually the last of the team to finish and now we’re actually getting a break.” Jimin beamed. Breaks were rare and far between unfortunately.

“Can we trade places? I have overseer duty after this,” he laughed. “But congratulations, you guys have been working hard for a while, you deserve it~” Jimin smiled and thanked him.

A bit of silence passed before Jimin got the courage to continue. “Hey Anderson, have you ever thought about the Before?” Anderson was taking a sip from his water bottle “What do you mean?”

“I mean, like before all of this. Like when we were human.” Jimin trailed off as he spoke wondering if what he was saying was nonsense to him.

“Of course I wonder. Hell, especially after being assigned here, knowing this was me at some point in time, it really does make you curious. Why?”

Jimin sighed “I don’t know… John and I had this conversation on our way here and it made me realize how much I wanted to remember”

“You know why they do it though”

“Yes but… I guess I’m just jealous” he chuckled sadly

Anderson smiled, “I get it.”

“Being here makes me nostalgic for the wrong reasons, and I don’t know. Maybe I really do need this break…”

“I know what you mean, if we even try to think back to our earliest memories it’s just...”

“Nothing,” Jimin said solemnly.

A bright white light radiated and blinded anything in sight. It was different. It seemed to go and pass quickly but he knew that wasn’t the case. He just knew, knew that the bright whiteness had been with him for a long time. That’s why when things began to take shape around him once again, everything felt so unfamiliar.

His eyes opened along with a sharp inhale, like suddenly he could breathe again. He was again.

It took some time to realize that he wasn’t in the white anymore, no, it was a room. A room covered in that familiar white that had him wanting to scream, cry, or… or?

He wasn’t alone.

A glance to his left…. then his right revealed there were others? Other what? Who were they….? Who was he?

“Hello.” A powerful voice boomed through the white room.

His eyes focused on where that sound was coming from. They seemed to burn the longer he stared. It was a… a thing? It was someone who looked no different to the people standing next to him, but it was an aura that made him want to crumple in fear.

“I know you must be confused. I am R̵̮͍͈̻͎̞̘̟͆̈́̍̐̐̔͝ͅẹ̸̢̥̰̬̺̟̰̖̜̪̯͚̈́͗̒̌́̑ḓ̴̢̞͙̤͇̰͈͎̜̞̖̪̠̞̽͋̑̒͜ͅa̶̢͎̭̬̼̩̯̽̄͝ç̴̯̗͉̱̎̃̾̉͐̀͜ͅt̶̼͍̝̫̩͉̗̺̰̭̣̜̀́e̴͚͉͖͒̈́̋̆̃̓͋̈̂͆̆́̍̏̇̚d̵̦̔̈́͑͝ and I will be the one leading you to the next step of your journey.”

The longer he paid attention the more he realized he didn’t understand a word that was being spoken, yet everything that was being said seemed to reach him in a level he wasn’t sure about.

“While we wait for you to collaborate, I will explain to you everything you need to know.”

Wait… He couldn’t…

“I won’t beat around the bush. You have died.” He didn’t understand, but the last word made a gut wrenching feeling start creeping up and made his head spin.

“You were selected by our high almighty as a new team of warriors, and we have on record proof of your consent if there is ever any questions. Right now though, I’m sure you don’t quite get these concepts. You feel empty, you can’t think, can’t speak. You’re essentially a blank canvas.”

A cool tone filled the room along with a pleasant sound.

“This was done in order to prepare you for the next stage. Now, that indicates that you should be collaborated. R̵̮͍͈̻͎̞̘̟͆̈́̍̐̐̔͝ͅẹ̸̢̥̰̬̺̟̰̖̜̪̯͚̈́͗̒̌́̑ḓ̴̢̞͙̤͇̰͈͎̜̞̖̪̠̞̽͋̑̒͜ͅa̶̢͎̭̬̼̩̯̽̄͝ç̴̯̗͉̱̎̃̾̉͐̀͜ͅt̶̼͍̝̫̩͉̗̺̰̭̣̜̀́e̴͚͉͖͒̈́̋̆̃̓͋̈̂͆̆́̍̏̇̚d̵̦̔̈́͑͝ please get the newcomers information.” Another figure appeared out of thin air. They carried the same vibe as the other one.

The figure travelled over to the end of the room, the farthest from himself.

“What is your name?”

“Taehyung.” The answer came so quickly that it made him realize he didn’t have one. He had no idea who or what he was.

The figure typed something into the thing they were holding and moved over. “What is your name?”

“Yoongi.” Again the answer came so quick.

The farther the figure got down the line the more he began to panic. He had no idea who he was.

“Seokjin.”

“Jungkook.”

All were the same quick answers.

“What is your name?”

“Namjoon.”

He was next.

He felt the power radiating off of the figure in front of him. Part of him wanted to cry.

“What is your name.” The figure looked up at him, the blue eyes boring into his own. It’s gaze had him acting out of his control and his mouth moving on its own.

“Jimin.” A voice that didn’t sound like it came from him, filled the white space of the room. The figure could sense his surprise and smiled slightly.

In the background Jimin heard the last one standing next to him.

“Hoseok.”

But he was too focused on the 5 letters that he had no idea where they came from. Jimin. The name he knew, knew for some reason never once was his. But it felt so right. Jimin… Jimin. It was him, he knew it.

“Now newcomers, it is time I explain to you what has and will happen to you all. As I’ve already made clear you all have died, it was by your choice that you were brought here instead of our Paradise unit. You were selected on the scale of potential. On what that potential exactly is, is unknown to us as well— but the high almighty has called upon you— this team of 7, as a new group to help sector H.E.A.V.E.N protect humanity.”

The figure that had somehow brought a name out of him began to speak. “Your team has been selected based on compatibility, in other words, you’re each other’s destiny. You are, like the humans like to say, soulmates. Chosen as a team that has the best chemistry and will work best together in stressful situations.”

The other figure smiled. “Yes, and now we need to transition you. You are a blank canvas waiting for a masterpiece to be painted. You are no longer human, but you’re still not fit to serve yet. We must bind you with the energy, the universe, for you to finally bloom. I will warn and say this process is not easy and you will need to suffer in order for you to reach the end. Once you do, we will meet to begin your training.”

“Please follow R̵̮͍͈̻͎̞̘̟͆̈́̍̐̐̔͝ͅẹ̸̢̥̰̬̺̟̰̖̜̪̯͚̈́͗̒̌́̑ḓ̴̢̞͙̤͇̰͈͎̜̞̖̪̠̞̽͋̑̒͜ͅa̶̢͎̭̬̼̩̯̽̄͝ç̴̯̗͉̱̎̃̾̉͐̀͜ͅt̶̼͍̝̫̩͉̗̺̰̭̣̜̀́e̴͚͉͖͒̈́̋̆̃̓͋̈̂͆̆́̍̏̇̚d̵̦̔̈́͑͝ and they will lead you to the waiting room. We’ll grab you individually, one by one, to begin your transformation.”

Out of nowhere the endless box that was this white room opened up to reveal a hallway. It felt out of his control but he followed the line out into the hallway. It was similar to the room in it’s eerily yet comforting white color, the ceilings were tall, and, did the hallway seem to stretch on… forever?

It was a short walk though, when they reached their destination. The room was small and felt oddly normal? Though Jimin really had no concept of normal, it certainly looked out of place compared to the rest of the place. It was just a table with plentiful chairs littered around the place.

“We will be back soon.” The door closed behind them all and they were left to themselves.

The 7 looked at each other, just analyzing. It should have been awkward, but Jimin felt comforted by their presence.

They couldn’t talk, nor hardly understand. Their minds were a blank sea of nothing and now that they were alone the reality of it all seemed to come crashing down on them heavily. Jimin noticed everyone’s eyes begin tearing up, and took it upon himself to comfort them. He pulled everyone tight into a hug. The warmth of their skin provided a sense of relief but everyone still just broke down, tears and tears just streaming down their faces. No one knew exactly why they were so upset, but it just felt good to get it out.

They were scared. It became a lot more obvious later when they all look back at this moment.

Jimin was never sure how long they were in there together, not a word was ever spoken, but in that time they went from complete strangers to a connection so strong it doesn’t make sense even to this day. It was something about this moment, this moment exactly that made them into the team they are.

By the time R̵̮͍͈̻͎̞̘̟͆̈́̍̐̐̔͝ͅẹ̸̢̥̰̬̺̟̰̖̜̪̯͚̈́͗̒̌́̑ḓ̴̢̞͙̤͇̰͈͎̜̞̖̪̠̞̽͋̑̒͜ͅa̶̢͎̭̬̼̩̯̽̄͝ç̴̯̗͉̱̎̃̾̉͐̀͜ͅt̶̼͍̝̫̩͉̗̺̰̭̣̜̀́e̴͚͉͖͒̈́̋̆̃̓͋̈̂͆̆́̍̏̇̚d̵̦̔̈́͑͝ was back, they opened the door to find all the boys in the corner of the room, huddled together, tears still stained their faces but a warm feeling was felt by the two, a smile on their faces.

“Hoseok please come with us.” The two figures noticed the way the boys seemed to panic as he stood up. They were quick to pull him back down into a hug of comfort knowing what was to come would be difficult. “Don’t worry you’ll see each other soon again.”

Hoseok got back up timidly and went toward the door. “The process is quick so we’ll be back shortly.” And they were gone.

It was weird with someone missing, it honestly made the waiting even harder. Part of Jimin expected to hear something, he didn’t know what exactly but the only sounds he heard was that of their breathing. It was too quiet.

Like they said it wasn’t long before they were back. You could feel the tension in the room with everyone wondering what happened to Hoseok.

“Seokjin, you’re next.” Time seemed to pass by slower as more and more were taken away, and it became harder each and every time.

“Yoongi.”

“Taehyung.”

“Jungkook.” Jimin distinctly remembered the look on Jungkook’s face when one of the figures called his name. Jungkook liked to laugh about this nowadays, but that look of fear still sometimes haunts him to this day. He couldn’t quite express it in that moment, none of them could, but the fear in his doe eyes had tears pooling, both in his and Namjoon’s eyes, as they led him out the room.

And when they came back and took Namjoon and he was the only one left… It was worse then what would be happening next.

“Jimin” They finally called. Jimin got up hesitantly and began walking with the two figures. “Your teammates are all waiting for you. They’re getting ready for their first lesson.”

Their words comforted him slightly but that still didn’t stop the nerves that peaked as they walked into a new room. It was bigger than any of the ones he’s been into so far. The ceilings were as high as the hallways but the room was split into two, cut off by a wall.

The two figures went over to the wall and a wall full of controls popped and they began pressing some things. “Alright Jimin what you’re gonna do is step through that archway and we’ll tell you what will be happening next.

Jimin turned his head to see the archway, being illuminated by a bright blue glow. He took a deep breath and did as he was told. As he passed through a weird feeling seemed to pass over him.

He could hear his heart pounding loudly.

“Ok Jimin, you see the big blue X on the floor, you’re going to stand right in the center.” He moved a little deeper in, standing on the x. This side of the room was weird in the sense it felt as if it was… alive. He didn’t know how to explain it, but it felt as if the walls were breathing with him.

“Great ok~ We’re about to turn this on. Like I mentioned to you in the briefing this will not be pleasant. You are going to experience, learn, and feel many things at once as your body transforms and merges. You will awaken.”

Jimin was scared. He was.

“Ok give us a thumbs up when you’re ready. We’ll be standing right outside. When you’re done just come out the same way you came and we’ll take you to the others.” The figure smiled again.

He was really scared. But it was like he wasn’t controlling body again because his hand came up and made a gesture, he didn’t know what it was.

It was one push of a button and suddenly the figures began to back away from the wall and the archway sealed itself, scaring him even more.

The room quickly began to fill with a sort of mist. It seemed to sparkle almost. Jimin was a bit confused, but that peaceful moment didn’t last long because suddenly the ground seemed to disappear right under his feet. He expected fall but instead the mist was replaced with darkness and he seemed to float in this void.

It was quiet for a mere second before whispers started filling his head. At first it was quiet but then it felt like yelling. Yelling. Yelling. Yelling. He couldn’t even understand but he wanted to scream but couldn’t. That was until one distinct voice seemed to stick out from the rest and he understood it loud and clear.

“A W A K E”

Then it was quiet again.

Jimin looked up, down, left, right, everywhere. Giant rings of eyes seemed to stare into his soul. The sight had him wanting to scream but he couldn’t even think about it before pain.

Flashes of images, of everything, everything. He understood it all. And the pain in his back, his head was too much. It was too much.

He could see it all, hear it all, everything made sense. Everything, everything started to make sense. The pain in his back was getting worse.

The rings started getting smaller and smaller as he stared right into the eyes of this creature. It was weird but it felt so familiar, like he was staring right into a mirror.

Everything just got worse the more he saw and learned and the pain became too much to bear. Too much too much. It got worse and worse but it peaked right before things became normal again. He was back in the room and the archway was open again.

He felt different.

Good.

The pain was gone and he could think. He was in control again.

Jimin looked down at his hands, feeling the power course through his veins.

Do you like it?

Yes.

I knew you would.

He headed for the archway waiting to meet Atara and Celine. Jimin marveled at the way their names finally came to him. He stood outside the archway for a second admiring, realizing they didn’t notice him yet. The two beautiful figures seemed to defy all laws of possibility as their beauty radiated and filled the room. Their hair was long and shimmered with gold, their faces soft and inviting. Jimin remembered before he couldn’t process exactly what they were but now the answer was so clear.

Angels.

Jimin nearly choked when Celine noticed him. He went to step out of the room when something stopped him from leaving, as if he was caught on something. Jimin turned to see that’s exactly what happened.

He heard the two lady’s laugh at the awkward situation.

Behind his back, what got on the archway were a pair of white wings that was double the size of him. Jimin swore that a soft glow seemed to radiate as the feathers gleamed in the light.

Atara and Celine ran over to help him. “You’re not the first” Atara smiled as she helped tuck his wings in to get him through the arch.

“First lesson for you is getting this under control.”

“Jimin listen.” Celine beamed

They’re a part of you, you know. Just like your legs, hands, feet, you have control.

I do have control.

Jimin’s sprawled wings began to retract until they faded into nothing. Celine and Atara stood there impressed… usually this would take a lot longer to explain, but Jimin and even the rest of the boys seemed to do well at listening.

Interesting.

“Good job! Now follow us, this is the last step of getting you ready.” Atara grabbed Jimin’s hand and led him to a smaller machine. Jimin stared at the contraption worried considering what happened last time.

“Don’t worry, all you have to do is put your hand here.” Atara gestured to the blue panel.

You will be fine, don’t worry.

Jimin rested his hand on the panel. The machine whirled and colors began to flash, it only lasted for about a minute before a door suddenly opened. At first he was confused at what was supposed to be happening but Celine’s gasp is what turned his attention down further. There on the floor of the machine was a long cylinder type thing with writing and pictures all over it.

“What is it?” He questioned the two. They both shrugged. “You’re supposed to tell us, pick it up!” Atara happily bounced.

Jimin bent down and grabbed the object.

It’s yours, can’t you see?

Yes I can.

Right there in the center of it was writing that was unfamiliar, but he perfectly understood. It was his name. Jimin.

Atara and Celine smiled at each other as the realization came onto Jimin.

“So what does it do?” Atara tried to question but Celine stopped her “Not here, we can test it out later. Come on Jimin, let’s take you to the others~”

Jimin’s heart skipped a beat at the mention of them.

Atara and Celine lead him down the hallway again. Now that he could talk again, he figured he would ask questions.

“So, what’s this hallway exactly?”

Celine looked at him “It’s your hallway, or rather, your team’s unit. This place will change as we get closer to your first mission, but it will still even after, it just depends on what the team needs.”

Jimin nodded. “So there’s no one else here?”

Atara nodded “Yep, it’s just 9 of us here. Technically me and Celine aren’t even meant to be here, but we’re your mentors. As soon as you guys go on your first mission it’ll be all to yourselves.”

Jimin marveled at the idea. All of this?

When they all finally reached the door to the dorm, Jimin noticed immediately how much he was missing before he woke up.

There were the 6 others that he left for what has felt like an eternity. Jimin finally took notice of the white hair and blue eyes that looked at the three that came into the room. They had that same feeling as when first Atara looked at him.

“You’re all done guys, we’re gonna set up the training room.” And with that, the two angels were gone.

Taehyung happily ran over to Jimin and pulled him into a hug and the other boys joined him and they all huddled into a hug. It just felt so right with them.

Wow.

“Oh wait, we were supposed to give you these.” Hoseok handed him a pair of folded clothes on top of one of the beds. Jimin looked down at the fabric, just now realizing he’s been naked this whole time.

He quickly got dressed, it was just a plain white shirt that he tucked into the loose fitting pants, tied together with a long piece of fabric. When he was done, this was the first time he got to look at himself in the mirror. He was shocked slightly at how beautiful he was. He also had the same white hair and blue eyes as the others.

Is that really me?

You like?

Yes. A lot.

Jimin smiled and turned around to the others who were talking on the other side of the room. He went over.

“It was so weird…” Hoseok sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. The rest of the boys mumbled affirmations and agreements.

“What’s weird?” Jimin asked, joining the conversation.

“Oh we were just talking about our experience waking up. Hoseok was saying that it felt like that thing he saw was him” Namjoon helped fill him in. Jimin knew exactly what he was talking about even with the vague details.

“It was like I was looking at a mirror, but not my own, like I was seeing someone else’s reflection,” he continued.

I am you.

I know.

“For me, it was like looking in the mirror but with someone else’s eyes. It wasn’t what I saw necessarily, but I could still tell it was me at the end of the day” Jimin added and the boys awed, knowing he hit the nail on the head with that analogy.

“Exactly, it’s just like a different perspective,” Namjoon added.

“That and I just feel… different,” Jungkook said looking down at his arms.

“I know right, it’s kinda cool~ I like it,” Yoongi smiled

“Anyway, enough serious stuff, Tae—Tae please tell the others what you told me,” Hoseok was already laughing.

“But they’re just gonna laugh like you’re doing now…” he pouted

“Tae—Taehyung apparently got stuck trying to get through that archway,” Hoseok struggled getting out

“Please tell me I wasn’t the only one...” Tae asked hesitantly, but the group laughed imagining it. Jimin tried to join in but they all could see through that “You too?” Seokjin asked

“It happ—“ before Jimin could even finish the room erupted with laughter. Tae quickly pulled him into a hug “See! I wasn’t the only one…” He pouted.

“Ehm Guys” everyone’s attention turned to see Celine standing in the doorway. Embarrassed, they all quickly followed her out and she led them a little further down the hallway into a new and somehow even bigger room.

This room, unlike the last, was open, no walls in the way, with equipment seemingly everywhere.

“This is your training room, boys. We will be spending lots of time here getting you ready for the field. Our training will include…” Celine looked up making the boys do so as well. The boys' mouths dropped when they saw Atara at the top, wings sprawled, sitting inside a ring made of this strange light.

Celine pressed a button before more of those rings showed up around the ceiling. Atara moved back slightly before flying through the course quickly making all of the boys’ jaws drop as she landed right next to Celine.

“Flying, and we’ll also….” Atara held her hand out before a bow appeared. Small bullseyes materialized at the far end of the room. Atara drew back the bow and before their eyes a flash of light appeared and quickly shot over to the other side of the room. Celine beckoned them to follow.

Right in the center of the target was a beam of light they could only assume was what Atara shot.

“You’re going to be able to do this, each and every time. The tiniest mistake could end humanity. There is no 99% accuracy here, only 100%.” Atara said seriously, that slightly scary aura coming back.

“We’ll be here for a while boys, it will take a while training you all into perfection, but we know you will work hard. You are here for a reason after all.” Celine smiled.

“Now we have a lot to do, we have to assign team roles, begin your history lessons, flight training, scenario training, accuracy training, and have you all start observing before you can even see yourselves going back to earth again. It will take time, but the quicker we start the quicker you’ll become an amazing team of warriors fighting for humanity.”

Jimin looked over at the others and he couldn’t help but smile seeing the determined look on their faces.

“You guys ready?” Atara bounced, returning back to her bubbly persona.

The boys cheered a yes.

“Good, first thing we’ll be doing is figuring out those weapons, go back to your dorm and grab them. Seeing you all get them, we already know you’ll be a team that will have those demons running.” Celine chuckled.

These guys were going places, they knew that already.

Jimin admired the stars twinkling above his head.

“That did not happen,” Yoongi pouted

“Yes it did, no because this guy will say this and then do it again.” Seokjin pointed out and the boys began to laugh. It was true.

The boys were enjoying their break on a little beach, far away from society. The stars were bright above them as they sat outside grilling under the little gazebo. It was always moments like these that Jimin would enjoy the most. Away from it all, a breath of fresh air. No demons to worry about, no missions, no H.E.A.V.E.N, just them. It almost felt like they were normal.

It’s not that he didn’t enjoy what he did, of course protecting humanity is a duty he prides himself upon, but getting away from it is always needed no matter if you love or hate your job.

“Jimin, remember that time when we were trainees and Hoseok was practicing and you got the great idea of sneaking up on him.” Tae mentioned

Everyone cringed remembering it.

The equation was simple. Scaring someone who was easily startled + a weapon was in his hand + he was in the zone + he was still getting used to his new abilities = a disaster.

Celine and Atara were stuck patching up stab wounds on everyone and the training room was nearly destroyed completely, the boys spending days trying to fix everything.

“Actions have consequences,” Hoseok smirked, grabbing one of the pieces of beef that Seokjin served.

“You weren’t the one who was stabbed 50 times” Jk mumbled

“Serves you right for sneaking up on me~”

“You literally were this close to destroying the whole universe, if Celine and Atara hadn’t been there” Yoongi started

“YA—“

“Guys!!” Namjoon called out running back from their beach house. He had said he was going to receive a phone call and ran back inside a little while earlier.

“Fun’s over… back to work” he sighed, handing over files with their names on them.

Jimin felt the mood turn slightly somber. This was expected though. Their wardrobes consisting of mostly hawaiian shirts, shorts, sandals, and the tan lines they’ve gotten after spending so long in the sun can tell you that this break has lasted for some time. Nearly a year and a half to be exact.

One of the longest they’ve ever gotten.

It’s been nice, but they have responsibilities they need to get back to.

“H.E.A.V.E.N called and I went back for a little bit… sorry it’s only on paper, the higher ups said it was best to keep our documents within the time period and being on an island in 1972, there wasn’t much I could do.”

Jimin looked down at his file and went ahead and opened it. “We’re guardians again?” Seokjin questioned. “I know right, I was a little surprised as well.”

The duties they serve would usually change each time. They had a whole conversation not that long ago about how they were sure they would be looking after humans in H.E.A.V.E.N as it’s been a while since they’ve had that role whenever their break would come to an end.

Jimin scanned his file.

“Y/N L/N?” He mumbled quietly to himself. He looked over some of your details, date of birth, and general facts collected by the p1 angel.

Jimin was again shocked to find that you were born in 1996. So close to John? Obviously that was a 36 year difference in dob but usually his assignments were spread hundreds, sometimes even thousands of years apart.

This is weird.

It is.

Jimin flipped the page to the next page, finally getting a picture of you and… he just stared.

Wow Wow

You were beautiful.

“332 BC? Well this won’t last long,” Seokjin mumbled

“Oh you’re wrong for that,” Namjoon chuckled.

“It’s the truth, this man is a soldier in the Lamian War, this probably won’t last long” Seokjin showed Namjoon the file and the both laughed together.

“I’m going to 2132,” Tae showed the group

“Wait, wasn't that when…” Yoongi asked

“I went to 2261 before and it’s uhhh… yeah.” Hoseok mentioned. “Good luck with that,” he patted Tae on the back knowing he would need it.

“Jiminie, what about you?” Tae asked. He leaned over to look at his file noticing his was kinda spaced out.

“Woah,” he said, seeing the picture Jimin had been staring at. Tae grabbed the it and showed it to the group “Look who Jiminie gets to look over”

The boys awed

“Someone’s lucky~” Namjoon sighed, making the other boys laugh and Jimin’s cheeks start warming up.

“When are you going to?” Jungkook asked

“2016.” He said, reading the paper.

“Ooo we’re pretty close then,” Tae beamed

“Hey when are we leaving?” Yoongi asked

“Next Wednesday” Namjoon answered, but Jimin’s mind was in other places.

You.

Y/N L/N

If only he knew beforehand what you were going to do to him. Maybe then he would have filed for a change for his sake and yours.

If only he knew the pain you both were in stored for.

If only he knew..

[THIS DOCUMENT HAS BEEN CENSORED SLIGHTLY. SOME QUESTIONS AND EVENTS CONTAINED SENSITIVE MATERIAL THAT SHALL NOT BE DISCLOSED. INFORMATION WILL REMAIN CONFIDENTIAL.]

main masterlist ✩ series masterlist » next chapter

[justthehiddleswrites]

Accidentally Married | Tom Hiddleston x OFC | Chapter 8 | I  think my guest celebrity taste tester may have something to do with.

A/N:  Tom makes certain comments about an ex (who is unnamed).  It is a fictional girlfriend, take from it what you will.  Keep your hate to yourself.  This is the last chapter!  Thank you for sticking around! I maybe bring these two back for more adventures. 

SERIES MASTERLIST HERE

Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x OFC (Molly Bishop)

Summary: Tom is stuck in a news cycle from hell; Molly is stuck in the dead end job of bartending with a pile of student and credit debt.  Tom has an idea to solve all their problems.  Get married, get the paparazzi off his back, divorce after a year and Tom pays off Molly’s debts.  Tom has everything figured out, that is until he sees Molly as more than a just a friend and so does someone else.  In this vying for affections who will win, the handsome Brit or the boy from Boston?

This Chapter: With feelings revealed and reciprocated, Tom and Molly move ahead in their relationship. Happily ever after?

Warnings: fake marriage, smut (vaginal sex), mentions of:  child abuse/neglect, foster care, substance abuse, cheating.

TAGLIST IS OPEN! PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED!  THANK YOU FOR READING!

--

Tom called Chris later that day and made apologies.

“Nah, man. I was out of line. Just wanted a bit of what you and Molly have. She’s a great girl.”

“She is. The best. No hard feelings?”

“Buy me a beer the next we meet?”

“I’ll buy you two. Thanks for understanding.”

“Just don’t tell Robert. I would never hear the end of it.”

“Of course. Now I have some things to attend to.”

“Tell Molly I have to raincheck on lunch. Sounds like she has more important things to do. “

Tom just smiled.

-

Three Months Later

“It’s so nice to have all you here.” Diana gazed around the table. “Emma, would you be a dear and clear the plates?”

Emma caught Tom’s eye, and he quickly got up. Molly choked on a roasted potato.

“I’ll take care of it, Mum.” Tom grabbed several dishes and disappeared into the kitchen.

Molly leaned over to Emma. “You know if you keep blackmailing Tom into doing all the chores around your mum, he’s going to keep being her favorite.”

“Tom!” Emma popped up as Molly smirked. “I’ll help too.” She jogged off to the kitchen to help.

“So what are you doing these days, darling? I noticed you haven’t had as much time for lunch.”

“I have been busy cooking.” Tom walked back in and Molly pulled him in for a kiss. “Tom suggested it.”

Tom sat back down and pulled Molly close to him. “Your food is too good not to share with the world, love.” Tom’s stubble tickled her cheek as he nuzzled in.

“Stop it!” She playfully smacked his chest. “It’s just a blog and an Instagram account. Nothing fancy.”

“You are too modest. An Instagram with over 500,000 followers. That is quite the accomplishment.”

“I think my guest celebrity taste tester may have something to do with.” Molly booped Tom’s nose. “In fact, I suspect you pushed for the Instagram account so you don’t have to update your own.”

Tom blushed. “You know I don’t care for the spotlight.”

Emma scoffed. “Lies. You are a grade A drama queen, Thomas.”

“Not anymore. Give me the quiet domestic life.” Molly leaned her head against his shoulder.

“Good.” Diana said. “Then next week’s dinner is at your house.”

“I can do that.” Molly responded. “I need some more guinea pigs.”

“Then it’s settled.” Diana smiled.

Tom whispered in Molly’s ear. “Should we tell them now?”

Molly nodded eagerly.

“Tell us what?” Emma’s head darted around. “The two of you aren’t pregnant, are you?” She squealed.

“Our family is expanding. We..” Molly said.

“Are…” Tom continued.

“Getting a Dog!” Molly finished.

“Well, it’s no grandchild, but a start.” Diana smiled.

“And the other surprise is…” Molly spied up at Tom.

“We’re getting married!” Tom waved his hands in the air. Emma and Diana stared at them. “What no celebration?”

“Well dear, it just that… aren’t you two already married?” Diana commented.

“We are but…” Tom nudged Molly.

“We realized that none of our friends and family were there to celebrate with us, so we decided to renew our vows.”

Diana clapped her hands together. “Oh, that is lovely, dears. A proper ceremony and reception.”

“I thought you would like that, Mother.” Tom added.

“You were right, Thomas. Now Molly, I realize you don’t have any family here, but if you’ll let I would love to help you with preparations, just your mother would.”

Molly sniffled. “I would like that very much. Thank you.”

“I’ll help too!” Emma added. “I love shopping.”

“Lord help my bank account.” Tom groaned.

-

They got back home late and Molly leaned against the door.

“That was a long day.” she sighed, dropping her purse to the ground. Tom caged her against the door. He nuzzled into her neck. “Tom, your whiskers tickle!” She squealed.

Tom kissed wet, sloppy kisses along her neck. “Then stop me.” He purred into her, hooking one of her legs around his waist. “You know my mum makes a good point.” His hands teased her shirt up and slipped underneath, caressing her warm skin.

“What was that?” She arched her back into his touch, reaching behind to grip his ass with both hands.

“We really should give her a grandchild….” Tom squeezed her breasts over her bra. “A little boy or girl with your eyes and my hair.” Tom muttered, rocking his hips against her.

“Not right now, but that doesn’t mean we can’t practice?” Her eyes twinkled.

“I like practice.” Tom lifted her up and carried Molly to their bedroom.

-

They set out the next day to the local animal shelter to pick out a dog. Molly was certain Tom would want a big dog, a golden retriever, or a Labrador.

“Because I’m a human golden retriever?” Tom questioned.

“Something like that.” Molly giggled. “Except I don’t have to leash you out in public.”

“Naughty, darling.” Tom nipped at her as he wrapped his arm around her waist.

“Only because your mind is in the gutter.”

They walked along the corridor of cages. Molly pointed out a setter, but Tom shrugged it off.

“I’ll know our dog when I see it.”

Molly and Tom rejected each dog as they passed, along with Molly pleaded for one in particular.

“But this little guy looks just like Chris’s dog, Dodger!” Molly pleaded.

Tom furrowed his brow. “Is that supposed to convince me to say yes?”

“Yes?” Molly asked hopefully. “I thought you two made up.”

“We did, but it doesn’t mean I want a dog just like his.”

“Fine.” Molly leaned down and patted the dog’s head. “Sorry, buddy. I tried.”

Tom spun around, arms wide. “Maybe we should go to another place, love?”

“We’re not done yet.” She shoved him down the way. “I have a feeling our dog is here.”

They finally made it to the last stall where a small brown ball of fur lay in the corner.

“Hey buddy.” Molly called out.

The puppy’s head popped up, and he trotted over, floppy ears and all.

“He’s a spaniel, Tom.” Molly commented as the puppy licked her hand. “And friendly too.”

“Oh, I like him.” Tom leaned down and extended his hand. He was rewarded with a copious amount of licks. “I like him a lot.”

“Is he the one?” Molly gazed up at Tom, who was smiling at the dog. She recognized that look, often been the recipient of that look.

“I think he is, darling.” Tom hugged her tight. “Definitely.”

They went to fill out the paperwork as they brought the puppy out.

“And what are we naming this little guy?” they asked as the puppy was handed over to Tom, with his too big paws for his body. The puppy caught Tom’s face with his tongue.

“I’ve always liked the named Bobby. What do you think?”

Molly scratched the puppy’s head. “Bobby. I like that. You ready to head home, Bobby?”

Bobby responded by barking.

“I’ll take that a yes.” Tom added. “He appears to be quite vocal.”

Molly groaned. “Just what I need, another Hiddleston male to yell at me.”

Tom leaned over to kiss Molly. “I promise never to yell at you again. And we can put Bobby in obedience school.”

Bobby barked again as Tom leaned over again and kissed Molly passionately.

“Perhaps you are the one in need of obedience school, Mr. Hiddleston.” she smirked.

“Only if you are my teacher, Mrs. Hiddleston.” Tom smirked right back.

[valdomarx]

Anon requested: Person A thinks that a proposal would be a great way to get out of a jam. Person B thinks it is a sincere proposal and accepts. Realizing it wasn't done from a genuine place leads to some upset.

In Jaskier’s defence, it had seemed like a good idea at the time.

“Marry me, Geralt!” he called, jogging over to his witcher, a little out of breath.

Geralt’s face pinched into something cross and Jaskier was sure he was about to be told to fuck entirely off.

“It’s the Belleteyn festival tonight,” he explained quickly. “I might have, erm, sown my seed a little more widely than would be advisable in the town.” Geralt scowled. “And there may have been some, ahem, threats against my person made by the local lord.“ Geralt’s scowl deepened. “But we can smooth it all over if we’re wed tonight. There’s some local custom -- forgiveness of past indiscretions for newly married couples on May Eve.“

Geralt was still glowering but he hadn’t said no yet. Jaskier pulled out his strongest move: He ducked his head, looked up at Geralt from under his lashes, and licked his lips. Geralt’s eyes followed the movement of his tongue almost imperceptibly.

“So marry me? Here. Tonight.”

.

It had been a lovely ceremony, as fake weddings go. There had been music and wine, dancing and merriment, and Geralt even allowed some of the local girls to braid flowers into his hair.

They’d only had enough coin for one ring, a simple silver band, so Jaskier had taken that and he’d given Geralt his father’s signet ring. He’d never have parted with it for anyone else, but it was Geralt. He knew without question he would keep it safe until this ruse was over with.

Perhaps there really was something magical in the air at that time of year, or maybe it was an evening spent at an increasingly raunchy celebration that did it. But after the festivities were over and the townsfolk returned to their homes, Geralt took Jaskier back to their campsite in the woods, laid him down on a bedroll with indescribable tenderness, and fucked him within an inch of his life.

It was everything Jaskier had been quietly fantasising about for years, except more because it was Geralt and even Jaskier’s profoundly vivid imagination couldn’t match the reality of his witcher, every glorious inch of muscle straining and taut, eyes blown wide with lust, taking Jaskier apart and piecing him back together again.

.

The next morning, Jaskier woke slowly, feeling the telling ache of a night well spent. Geralt was already up, packing up camp and loading their bags onto Roach.

“There’s oatmeal in the pot if you want breakfast,” Geralt grunted. “We should get going soon.” He turned back to his work.

Right. Okay. They just... weren’t going to talk about it then. Back to business as usual.

Jaskier shouldn’t have been surprised. Of course Geralt would be as pragmatic about sex as he was about everything else. A way to get some relief, to meet a need. No expectations.

Hell, it had taken Geralt over a decade to admit they were actually friends. Jaskier felt stupid for even hoping for more.

Sleeping together had been a one time deal, it seemed. Too bad.

.

Jaskier realised he was still wearing the ring a few hours later. He should take it off, get rid of it. Maybe sell it at the next town.

He should ask Geralt for his father’s ring back too. But it seemed somehow rude to ask, too needy.

And he... well, he sort of liked catching glimpses of it decorating Geralt’s finger, like a tiny piece of Jaskier was with him wherever he went.

Jaskier found his thumb rubbing over the silver band around his own finger over and over again. It was silly, he knew, but he liked the feel of it. He would keep it for now.

.

After that, things got weird. At lunch, Geralt tried to persuade Jaskier to eat the last of the apples, as if he didn’t know their supply was running low. And at dinner, Geralt hunted and prepared two squirrels for Jaskier instead of the customary one. Jaskier would eat just about anything in a pinch, but charred rodent was not something he felt the need for seconds of.

Everywhere they went, Geralt kept trying to foist food on him. Did he think that Jaskier was weak? That he wasn't able to keep up without extra supplies? Jaskier was, admittedly, not as young as he used to be, but he thought he still measured up pretty well in the fitness department. He didn’t love the implication that he was falling short in some way.

.

At night, Geralt would lay out their bedrolls close together. Close, but never touching. When he laid down, Jaskier could feel Geralt’s breath on the back of his neck, and his chest ached with want.

He waited every night for Geralt to sneak an arm around his waist and pull him close, or to lean forward and whisper an invitation in his ear. Jaskier would be on him in a second.

But he never did, and every night Jaskier berated himself again for being so foolish and tried to push the thoughts from his mind. It was hard being so close and yet so far from what he truly wanted, but he wouldn’t force Geralt into a situation he wasn’t comfortable with.

.

After a week of this Jaskier was truly beginning to lose his mind, and it was a relief when they came upon a small town where they could rest for the night. Jaskier could go out, find some company and distract himself from the hopeless longing settled in his bones, even if only for the night.

When he announced his intention to look around the town, Geralt said he would come along too. That wasn’t ideal for Jaskier’s plan of distraction, but he’d make it work. He always enjoyed Geralt’s company anyway.

There wasn't a lot going on in the town, but there was a pretty barmaid in the tavern, a cheerful red-haired lady with exuberant freckles and strong curves. She flashed a smile at Jaskier the moment they walked in.

Perfect. He smiled back, ordered two drinks, and set to flirting outrageously with her. She giggled and teased back, not seeming intimidated by Geralt‘s presence, even though he was growing notably testier as their interactions became more charged.

When she reached over the bar to twirl a finger through Jaskier’s hair, Geralt actually growled.

She backed off and looked at Geralt. “Didn’t mean any harm,” she said. “I’m just being friendly. Unless...” She looked down at their hands on the bar, apparently noting their rings, and then back to Jaskier. “Unless you’re spoken for. I wouldn’t want to intrude.”

“Oh, it’s nothing like that,” Jaskier said with a laugh, just as Geralt said, “Yes, actually, we’re married.”

Jaskier stared at Geralt. Geralt stared at Jaskier. The barmaid held her hands up in the universal gesture for “none of my business, nothing to see here” and backed away to wipe down a table.

Every muscle in Geralt’s neck was tense and throbbing, and Jaskier had no idea what to say.

“Geralt,” he began, carefully. “is this about the other day? The ceremony? Did you... Did you think that was for real?”

Something pained flashed across Geralt’s face, an expression more raw than any Jaskier had seen on him before. Then he stood, turned, and bolted from the tavern.

“Geralt!” Jaskier called, getting to his feet. “Geralt, wait!”

By the time Jaskier was out of the door, Geralt was already disappearing down the dirt road, not turning back.

Ahh, fuck.

.

Jaskier left the girl at the tavern with a hurried apology, pausing only to throw their various possessions into bags and to load up Roach before heading out after Geralt. He knew bugger all about tracking, but he knew the direction Geralt was heading, and after that he relied on Roach’s instincts. She at least seemed confident in what to do.

He caught up to Geralt less than a mile outside of town. He was sat alone in a copse of trees just off the road, staring at the leaves.

He didn’t flee as Jaskier approached, though he didn’t turn to look at him either. “Geralt? I’m sorry. I was thoughtless. Please don’t be mad at me.”

Geralt stood slowly and turned to face him, though he avoided making eye contact. “It was a misunderstanding.” Geralt’s face was carefully blank, a look Jaskier recognised from times he was trying very hard to hide his emotions. “A wrong assumption on my part about the seriousness of the ceremony at Belleteyn.”

“Holy hell, Geralt.” Jaskier’s mind reeled. Geralt thought they had really been getting married, and he had been okay with that? “Does that mean... Would you actually want to be married to me?”

“It was stupid,” Geralt gritted out. Anyone else would have thought he was angry, but Jaskier knew him well enough to see he was hurt. “To think it was anything more than a distraction.”

No no no, that wasn’t right at all. Jaskier tried to take Geralt’s chin in his hand but Geralt turned his face forcefully away.

“Is that why you’ve been acting strange?” Jaskier thought back on it: the gifts of food, the aborted attempts at closeness, the feeling Geralt’s eyes on him constantly, checking his well-being.

“I thought...” Geralt wouldn’t meet his eyes. “I thought you wanted things to be normal. Like they always were.”

“If I were married to you for real, I wouldn’t act like everything was normal!” Jaskier exploded. “Damn it, Geralt. I’d kiss you every morning and hold you every night. And I’d tell everyone we met -- everyone -- that I was the luckiest person on the continent, because this is my husband, the one and only Geralt of Rivia, and he’s the best man I’ve ever met.”

Jaskier shut his mouth. Too late, though. Too late to take any of that back.

Geralt’s brow was pinched, though it didn’t quite look like a frown. It almost made him look thoughtful.

Finally he looked at Jaskier raised an eyebrow. “Every morning?”

Jaskier felt all the fight leaving his body in one grand sweep. Geralt let him push him to his knees on the ground and allowed Jaskier to flop into his lap. Jaskier brushed a strand of hair from his face. “I’ve thought about kissing you every day for years,” Jaskier confessed.

And then he saw it -- one of Geralt’s oh-so-rare smiles. Not the forced grimace he adopted when he needed to look nonthreatening, or the tolerant lip twitch he’d give Jaskier when he was trying to be funny. No, this was a genuine Geralt smile, more precious than gemstones, the kind that lifted his entire face and reached his eyes.

Geralt threaded a hand into the back of his hair, brought their faces closer, and kissed him. At the touch of their lips every part of him went boneless, held up only by Geralt’s arms and a determination to make as much bodily contact as he possibly could.

His head was spinning by the time they pulled apart for air. Geralt’s eyes were sparkling, and Jaskier could have lost himself in that sight for the rest of his life and considered himself a lucky man.

Geralt leaned their foreheads together. “Will you stay with me?” he asked, very quietly. “Even if all I can offer you is charred squirrel and sleeping beneath the stars?”

“Always,” Jaskier promised, without a shadow of a doubt. “There’s nowhere I’d rather be.”

Through the good and the bad, the injuries and the pain, the plenty and the lean times. Through it all, he wanted to be with Geralt.

Jaskier took Geralt’s hand in his and slotted their fingers together. Their rings lay next to each other, the elaborate gold of Jaskier’s crest shining against Geralt’s pale skin and the smooth silver encircling his own finger like an embrace.

It was all startlingly clear. “Marry me, Geralt,” he said, his heart welling over. “For real this time.”

[firefly-in-darkness]

Honey

Pairing →  Steve Rogers x Reader

Characters →  Marvel Characters.

Summary → Y/N has her mind set on hooking up with Steve Rogers, the only problem is that they’re in the middle of an Awards Ceremony.

Word Count → 1.6k

Prompt → Don’t Marry Her by Beautiful South for @cockslut-padalecki‘s Not My Ninth Challenge. 

SSB2021 Square Fill → More than Meets the Eye - @star-spangled-bingo

Warnings → 18+. Implied Cheating, Angst, Smut. Swearing.

Betas → @daydream3r-xo & @kalesrebellion // all mistakes are my own.

Firefly’s Masterlist // Star Spangled Bingo 2021

Y/N’s plan was fool proof. Tonight was the night she’d bag Steve Rogers, Captain America, America’s Ass and Golden Boy. Throughout the awards ceremony, she gave him a subtle smile or a seductive drag of her necklace to focus his attention to her exposed decolletage. On occasion, she’d catch the lust-filled glances when she bit down her bottom lip, fingers skimming the plunging neckline of the designer gown.

The intermission between the awards gave her the perfect opportunity to pounce; Steve was standing alone at the bar, his hands in the black slacks as he spoke jovially with the bartender. Gosh, he’s so sweet, Y/N pondered as she circled the beautifully decorated tables full of beaming smiles and chattering guests.

Y/N was ready to strike, only a couple of tables away, when Natasha also joined them at the bar, a wave of guilt seeped into her bones as she watched the redhead fix Steve’s bowtie. It would have been cute if Y/N hadn’t already known about their shared history and battles. 

The fully stocked bar was now calling her name, like a bumblebee seeking out its nectar. Y/N threw all caution to the wind to get something to dull the ache and nerves that crept up her skin. As she ordered her drink, Y/N kept a close eye on the pair, through the mirror at the bar, they were only a few feet away and she didn’t want to bring too much attention to herself.

After a kiss to Steve’s cheek, Natasha left his side to join Clint and Tony at their table. That’s right, Y/N didn’t get to sit with the Avengers, she was just a SHIELD agent after all. She gulped back the fiery bourbon, an attempt to wash away the bitterness from the table arrangements and how the press only wanted to see the team. Not the background lackeys.

“Something on your mind Y/N?” Steve’s voice brought her out of the glare she was boring into the mirror.

“Oh, Captain, I’m sorry. I was a million miles away.” Y/N waved her hand and a coquettishly smile formed on her rouged lips.

“I’ve told you before, please call me Steve.” He gestured to the barstool and Y/N obliged, knees knocking together with his as she took the seat, “I’m not as much of the fuddy-duddy that the team makes me out to be.”

Y/N giggled behind her hand at his choice of words before she straightened up, she couldn’t embarrass herself, this was the perfect moment, “and why are you hiding out over here instead of with your teammates?”

Steve glanced over to the Avengers; hundreds of eyes trained on them, photographers flashing away at each moment and the fans asking for autographs, “Well, I’ll let you into a little secret.”

She bit her lip and leaned closer, her hand resting on his knee. The excitement of being this close and touching Steve almost bubbled over in another giggle.

“I’m not a big fan of all that, and I’m probably going to head out of here soon.” Steve winked at her.

Y/N’s cheeks tingled at his gaze and she couldn’t help the way hers became entranced at the way his tongue poked out and swiped across his bottom lip. Snapping out of the haze, Y/N took to the floor, grabbing her skirt in one hand and Steve’s in the other.

He didn’t stop her but followed her blindly through the doors that the catering staff had entered into the ballroom. Zig zagging through the back rooms before finding a secluded spot. Y/N’s heart hammered in her chest as she tried to regain her breath.

To her surprise, and a small yelp later, Steve pulled open a supply closet door and tugged her in after him, “god, I’ve wanted to do this all night. All week.”

Y/N’s mind raced while Steve pulled her body flush to his in the dark. His cologne took over all her senses and the soft strokes of his fingers against her neck made her preen into the touch. Steve’s mouth crashed down to hers, a heated fray of lips, tongue and teeth as the passion ignited in them both. A few moments later, he pulled away, the pair of them panting in the confined space.

“I think about you all the time,” Steve whispered and nibbled at Y/N’s earlobe.

“Even though you have a fiancé?” Y/N gripped onto his biceps while he ravished her neck, humming in response to her question.

“Especially when she’s just lying there in bed, watching television without any thought for my needs.” Steve peppered kisses against the swell of her breasts. “There’s always an ‘I told you so’ after I do something rash.”

 Y/N quivered under his touch, all excitement pooling at her core, “He never listens.”

“Don’t go back to him.” Steve demanded.

“Don’t marry her.” She countered.

In a swift motion, Steve had pulled up her skirt, and lifted Y/N, hooking her legs around his hips. Steve’s hardened length underneath the soft material of his slacks pressed to her core, moans dripped from the lips that had attached to his neck.

Y/N’s kisses led to a confession, “I can’t forget that night when we had that mission in San Francisco Bay. It was perfect.”

“Oh, honey, I’d never forget,” Steve growled against Y/N’s sternum. 

“That’s a new pet name, honey.” She whimpered.

Before Steve could unzip his pants, they heard a knock. Y/N and Steve instantly pulled away and looked at one another in the near darkness. Then a third knock followed by a continuous wrap of knuckles.

The door was yanked open wide to an exasperated Tony Stark and Sam Wilson glaring at them both before the door was slammed shut in shock by Tony. It didn’t close, only opened up again, showing their widened eyes at the compromising position they had caught Y/N and Steve in. 

The door finally pulled to a close, a line of light from the way it hadn’t clicked shut. The pair gave each other sheepish smiles but didn’t move. How were they going to explain what was going on? That they were making out, on the verge of having sex in a cupboard.

A light knock on the door was followed by Sam’s muffled voice, “I think you’d better come out now.”

A blush had formed on Steve’s cheeks, a red tinge crept its way down his neck and the space Y/N had created from yanking apart his tie and collar. Fear was evident in Steve’s eyes, but there was still a mischievous glint in the dilated blues.

Y/N’s eyes widened in panic, knowing that she would look as equally dishevelled, if not more. Lipstick was smeared around her mouth and her hair no longer neatly tucked into the intricately pinned updo. Teeth dug into her bottom lip as she straightened Steve’s tie and smoothed down the evening gown, luckily unwrinkled.

Tentatively, she pushed down the handle and opened the door to the cleaning supply cupboard and met the disappointed brown eyes and folded arms of Sam Wilson. Steve followed behind, his hands on her waist before dropping at the sight of Sam’s glare now directed at him. Both felt like naughty school children, and they should really because what they were doing was wrong and they’d been caught out. 

“You better start explaining what the hell is going on right now.” Sam scolded, his stare unwavering from the pair. “Steve, you’re engaged for Christ's sake.”

Y/N went to speak but clammed up, opening, and closing her mouth. Guilt at being caught gnawed away at her stomach, while she focused on the floor and not looking at Steve or her superiors.

“Well, are you going to explain yourselves?” Tony looked between them, disappointment evident in his tone. “Now that your scandal is out in the open, care to share with the class?” 

Y/N sighed and ran her fingers through her hair, knowing there was no way out of this, “So here’s the thing, we both realised that we find these events boring so we came up with a list of things to spice it up a bit.”

“Are you serious, kid?” Tony shook his head, turned to Steve, “And I expected better of your righteous ass.”

Y/N nodded meekly at Tony, no longer able to speak from the disappointment and guilt she felt for what they had done. This wasn’t Steve, or her, for that matter. They’d just gone with the moment, caught up in it all.

Tony looked at his watch, “You both have an award to present in, oh, two minutes. Get yourselves cleaned up. Move it.”

Both walked away from the scolding looks, feeling like a pair of kids caught eating ice cream before dinner. Except this was much worse. Y/N snuck a glance to Steve, who swaggered away from Tony and Sam, a smug grin plastered on his face. She pulled her lips in, trying to hide the smile that was creeping up.

Sam called, “Y/N, you’re forgetting something.”

Y/N turned around, her brow pulled together in confusion until Sam lifted his left hand and pointed at his ring finger. Realisation dawned on her and she scrambled into her purse to find the sparkling diamond.

“Let me,” Steve took the ring from her and held out her hand, gently putting it into its rightful place. “Now that we’ve crossed off roleplay. What’s next on our List of Rebellious Deeds?”

Y/N rolled her eyes, and looped her arm through his, “come on honey, we can get back to what we were about to do in the closet the second we are home. No rebellion required.”

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[fortheloveofwonderland]

Under Silken Skies [Spencer Reid x fem! Reader]

A/N - just an angsty little oneshot I needed to get out of my head. Fufills my Break Up Square on my CM Bingo Card for @cmbingo​ . My permanent Tag List is open. Find my CM Bingo Masterlist Here. Find my full masterlist here.

My request are also Open for prompts/reqs/headcannons/aesthetics or just to say hi.

CW - major character death and lots of angst. Very vague mentions of smut and virgin! Spencer, vague mentions of Maeve and what happens to Spencer in the S15 finale (if it had ended differently). This does not have a happy ending.

WC: 4K

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He was eleven and you were thirteen. You didn’t know his name, only he was smart and awkward and got teased because of those things.

You found him tied to a flagpole as you’d left detention one night on your way across the soccer field. He was naked aside from his underwear and blindfolded. 

He cried as you untied him, his skin like ice. You insisted you were there to help, whether he believed you or not you weren’t sure. 

You stripped off your oversized jumper and slipped it over his head, helping him guide his arms in the holes. He didn’t thank you. He didn’t ask why. He just wrapped himself in the warmth.

He told you his name was Spencer. Spencer Reid and he’d been tricked by a girl and stripped of his clothes and tied to the flagpole. 

He’d been there hours before you found him. 

You sat together on the dewy grass, no more than a handful of words passed between you. He asked why you’d helped, why you’d stayed but you’d simply shrugged. 

Maybe you’d felt bad for him or maybe you’d felt drawn to him. You knew all about school bullies. 

He seemed so small and unsure of himself, as though the mere act of sitting with you was cause for panic. 

He didn’t make eye contact. You saw him glance in your direction a few times when you weren’t looking. 

He was so fragile you didn’t understand how anyone could do that to such an innocent creature. He just wanted to fit in, isn’t that all we really wanted? 

He couldn’t help being smart. 

There was a sadness about him that went further than what the bullies had done today. You could tell it was the kind of air that followed him around, a permanent dark cloud. 

It hurt you to know someone so young could carry so much pain. It didn’t seem fair that at his tender age he already seemed defeated by the world that surely had so much more to throw at him. 

What if he wasn’t strong enough to cope with the terrors of the world? You hoped maybe these formative years would make him stronger against what was to come. Maybe it was helping to build up those walls early, making him stronger for the horrors he would no doubt have to face later in life.

You weren’t sure, but one thing you were sure of was Spencer Reid had sad, sad eyes. You could tell he needed a friend and maybe you could be it. Maybe you could protect him.

So for now the two of you sat side by side on the soccer field, under the moonlit silken sky.

***

He was twelve and you fourteen and he was finally getting out of the hell hole that was high school. 

It was his graduation day and his gown drowned his small frame and his cap was too big for his head and kept falling to the side.

You straightened it for him again and gave him a soft smile. 

He was going to CalTech in the fall and you were so proud of him, but gosh were you going to miss him. 

It had only been little over a year since the night on the soccer field but the two of you had become friends. He helped you with your homework and you kept the bullies away from him. 

You’d become his protector, he looked up to you and although he would never tell anyone this, he had a crush on you. A big one. 

He was excited about CalTech but he was sad to leave you. 

There were a lot of mixed emotions in the air. You’d stay in touch and he’d come back and visit but it wouldn’t be the same.

Who was going to keep him safe at college? Who was going to keep an eye on him? What happened if the bullies at CalTech were even worse and you were hundreds of miles away not being able to do anything about it?

He’d told you not to worry about him, that he’d be fine but it was hard not to. He was still so tiny and fragile, like a baby bird and if truth be told you were scared for him. 

“I’m proud of you Crash.” You straightened his tie. 

He rolled his eyes under his thick glasses. One time you’d heard his mom call him that and you hadn’t stopped calling him it since. 

“Thanks Y/N.” He smiled but it was a sad smile. 

You placed your hands gently on his shoulders, knowing what he was thinking. You’d gotten really good at reading his mind.

“Me too.” You whispered. You leant close and placed a soft kiss on his cheek.

His face turned crimson and he chewed his lip. His cheek felt like it was on fire where your lips had touched him. 

“Come on Crash, it’s time.” You slid your hand in his and started leading him towards the stage he was going to walk over and accept his diploma. 

Within a matter of weeks he would be gone and you’d be alone again just as you had been before you’d met him. 

So for now the two of you walked hand in hard across towards the stage, under the sun soaked silken sky.

***

Spencer was sixteen and you were eighteen and you’d just witnessed his second graduation; this time from CalTech. 

The gown fit him a lot better this time than it had at his high school graduation. Over the last year or so he had sprung up in height, now towering over you. He had grown up a lot over the last few years. He was slowly becoming a man. 

“Look at you.” You nudged him in the arm. “So grown up.”

“Shut up.” He batted you away with a shy smile. “I wouldn’t have asked you to come here if I knew all you were going to do was embarrass me.”

“Sorry Crash.” you smirked. “I am so, so proud of you kid.” 

You gently tucked a strand of his hair behind his ear. His cheeks burned in embarrassment. 

He was coming back to Vegas and you would have been thrilled if it wasn’t for the fact in a few months you were going off to college yourself. 

It seemed unfair life had brought you together only to tear you apart over and over again. There seemed like there was never a right time for the two of you. 

“You ready?” you asked him softly, trying not to focus on the thought of being torn away from him again. 

“Almost.” he nodded, taking a few deep breaths.

You assumed he was trying to calm his nerves before taking to the stage for his graduation ceremony but it wasn’t that. 

His hands were shaking when he came close to you and placed them on your hips.

“What are you doing?” you tilted your head at him in confusion.

Before Spencer could change his mind about his next move he closed his eyes and moved in close to you. His lips were so soft as they pressed against yours, barely ghosting your lips. You could have been convinced it hadn’t even happened. 

He chewed his lip bashfully when he pulled back, looking at the floor.

“Sorry.” he whispered. “I uhm...lets go.” 

He walked past you, leaving you staring in his wake.

Had that really just happened? 

You brushed your fingers against your lips in disbelief. But your lips were tingling, it had definitely happened. 

Eventually you followed him in confusion but there was no time to ask him about it. Hopefully you’d get a chance to later.

So for now you walked behind him, watching him adjust his cap, under the Californian silken sky.

***

Spencer was now eighteen and you were twenty, in your final year at Georgetown. 

Spencer now had a doctorate in mathematics and was working towards one in chemistry. He kept talking about doing another doctorate in engineering when he was through.  

He had grown even more so and was really starting to grow into his looks. He’d always been cute, but recently when you looked at him you saw a handsome man looking back at you. 

Hanging out in your dorm that night it was hard to say how it started. One minute you’d been engrossed in a movie, your head on Spencer’s shoulder and the next you lips were pressed together, his tongue exploring your mouth. 

He hadn’t kissed you again since his CalTech graduation and you didn’t know where this had come from now. But you did know you’d been thinking more inappropriate thoughts about your friend as of late and they were seemingly materialising in front of your eyes. 

Spencer was a virgin, you were not. In that moment you wished he could have been your first time. 

It was slow and gentle and Spencer was a bag of nerves the whole time. He groped at your body with seemingly no purpose other than to feel every part of you. 

He didn’t last long, the feeling of being inside of you was too intense, too sensational. But it was nice. It felt right. It felt like home.

Afterwards he held you in his arms in your small single bed too nervous to look you in the eye. You stroked circles on his bare chest feeling the most content you’d felt in a long time. 

You both stared up at the ceiling which you’d painted midnight blue and was peppered with glow in the dark stars. 

“Spence?” You whispered softly.

“Yes Y/N?”

“You know I love you, don’t you?”

He exhaled and pulled you into him closer.

“I know.” He kissed the top of your head. “And I love you.”

You didn’t know what would happen tomorrow. You didn’t know if this was a one time thing or if this meant you were together now. You suppose it didn’t much matter right now. The only thing that mattered right now was Spencer holding you in his arms.

So for now you laid there together on your dorm room bed, under a mural of the silken sky.

***

He was twenty two and you were twenty four, and he’d just been offered a job at the FBI. 

In Quantico, Virginia.

You were sure you’d spent your whole relationship out of state from one another. The past three years Spencer had been away while he worked on a second BA and then his third doctorate. 

Since leaving college you’d stayed put in Vegas, getting a job as a curator at a local art gallery. 

You saw Spencer when you could but it never seemed to be enough. At least not for you. 

And then he’d dropped the bombshell about his job offer and told you he was moving to the other side of the country. 

It had been hard enough over the years to maintain your relationship but you were sure this would be the death of you. And so you’d told Spencer it was time the two of you went your separate ways.

He’d tried to argue that you could make it work but you weren’t willing to find out. The four years you’d gotten had been amazing but all good things had to come to an end.

And maybe you and Spencer had never been destined. It had always been just a little too difficult. You’d finally thought once you were in the same state it would be easier, but he was leaving again. 

It was hard but he supposed he understood. He would miss you with every fibre of his being but this job was too good for him to pass up.

You told him if you were meant to be, you’d find your way back to each other one day, although you weren’t sure you believed that. 

You sat on the swing set in the desolate park together, hands entwined together as you swung back and forth on your separate swings. 

He was leaving tomorrow. He was packed, his flight was booked and he had an apartment to go to in DC. 

He was leaving and you were staying and it broke your heart. 

“I’m gonna miss you Crash.” You squeezed his hand.

“I’m going to miss you too Y/N.” 

It felt like the end of an era but an era that had never really had a chance to begin.

He was supposed to be your one true love, your greatest love story. But this story didn’t get a happy ending.

You swung back and forth into the night, just revelling in being with him one last time. You couldn’t think about tomorrow. Tomorrow was a world away.

So for now you swung, hand in hand, under the midnight silken sky.

***

You were twenty nine and you loved him, you really loved him.

He had turned your whole world upside down and made you feel things you’d never thought you’d feel again.

You loved him, you really did.

But he wasn’t Spencer Reid. 

Maybe you’d gotten lucky and got to have two great loves of your life. Your life with Spencer was over long ago, it was only fair you were allowed to move on.

You wondered what twenty seven year old Spencer was doing with his life. Was he still at the BAU? Did he get a fourth doctorate? Was he happy?

God you hoped he was happy.

It was a small ceremony in front of your closest friends and family. No frills, no fuss. Just you and him being joined in matrimony. 

He was a good guy, a nice guy; he treated you right and he loved you. At the end of the day, that’s all that mattered right?

So you didn’t get butterflies in your stomach when he kissed you. Maybe you didn’t go weak at the knees when he looked at you or felt like you were coming home when you made love. And so what if you’d felt all those things with Spencer? That didn’t matter, did it? It didn’t mean you didn’t love your new husband.

It was just a different kind of love. You weren’t in your teens falling in love for the first time. This was the kind of love you had when you grew up and got older. It didn’t mean it meant any less; that he meant any less to you.

He led you outside by your hand as your friends and family showered you in confetti. He turned and smiled at you brightly. He looked the happiest you’d ever seen him, you didn’t know if you could match his happiness. 

You smiled back at him, probably not quite meeting his enthusiasm but if he noticed he didn’t say as much. It was only now that you looked down at the ring around your finger did it suddenly feel like a noose. You couldn’t allow yourself to think about how wrong it suddenly felt.

So for now you allowed your new husband to kiss you, under the Vegas Springtime silken sky.

***

He was thirty one and she was thirty. Her voice was like honey and he yearned to be able to hold her in his arms.

Her name was Maeve Donnovan and she had a stalker which was preventing them from meeting.

It was the first time Spencer had felt anything akin to love since you. He was sure he would never love again, you were the only person that could take that place in his heart.

And then had started having headaches and sought out the help of a geneticist and he started falling in love with her. For the first time in years you weren’t the first thing on his mind when he woke up in the morning. He didn’t spend all his waking hours pining over you. 

Maeve was slowly but surely replacing you in his heart. And Spencer really needed that. He needed you finally gone from his mind. 

“I think the stalker’s gone Spencer.” she’d told him that Sunday on the phone. 

A huge weight had been lifted from her voice, he could hear the smile in it down the payphone. He couldn’t help but smile in return.

“Are you sure?”

“Pretty sure yeah.” she was smiling brightly. He knew she would have a beautiful smile. 

“That’s great Maeve.” he smiled, gripping the phone in hands. 

Did that mean what he thought it meant? Could they finally meet now? Have a normal relationship?

“I want to meet.” her words were rushed as though she weren’t sure she should be saying them. But he caught them.

She wanted to meet. She wanted to meet him. 

He didn’t care what she looked like because she was already the most beautiful woman in the world to him. But what if she didn’t like him? What if he was too nerdy, what if his hair was too long and messy? What if she took one look at him and turned and ran?

He swallowed those nerves, trying to push them aside for another day. 

So for now he smiled shakily down the phone, under the blustery DC silken sky.

***

You were forty and recently divorced. You knew on your wedding day it would end this way.

You loved your husband but you would never love him the way you loved Spencer. You managed ten years before you’d called it quits. He’d always known your heart didn’t fully belong to him.

You missed Spencer everyday and it was so unfair how he could still take up so much of your mind. It was a cruel world you supposed. Maybe you just weren’t supposed to be happy.

You’d had your happiness and it had been short lived. But you were thankful for the brief happiness you had been given. It was more than some people got you supposed.

He was thirty eight and home visiting his mother. He didn’t work full time at the BAU anymore since his reinstatement after he was incarcerated and lectured at Georgetown part time. It allowed him more free time to fly out to Vegas to see his mom.

Lecturing at Georgetown brought back so many memories for him. Georgetown was the place he had lost his virginity, the place he’d told you he loved you for the first time. Georgetown held so many pleasant memories for Spencer but they were all bittersweet.

After spending some time grieving Maeve after she died, his mind landed right back on you. It seemed he was always pining over someone. It wasn’t fair. 

He was getting coffee on his way back to the hotel he was staying in when a familiar face materialised in front of him.

You weren’t there one moment and then suddenly you were, as though you had just appeared out of thin air. 

You held your own coffee cup in your hand, your eyes wide and jaw slack. He watched you swallow a lump in your throat.

“Hi Crash.” you couldn’t help his old nickname tumble out from between your lips.

“Hi Y/N.” his voice croaked, still trying to comprehend how you could so suddenly be here in front of him after all these years of absence.

He felt like that twenty two year old swinging with you side by side in the park counting down the hours until he left you. 

He felt like the sixteen year old young man who was falling hopelessly in love with you.

He felt like the eleven year old boy utterly grateful for you untying him from the flagpole. 

“It’s been a long time.” you spoke, your mouth dry.

“A really long time.” he agreed with a stiff nod. 

“Uhm...do you want to...coffee?” you ignored the fact you both had coffees in your hand. 

“O-ok.” he nodded stiffly again.

After all these years you had so much to say to each other but no words would come out. 

So for now you walked in silence down the Vegas street, under the cloud coated silken sky.

***

He was thirty nine years old when the explosion occurred. He’d thought it was just a concussion and didn’t pay it much mind. 

You were forty one years old when you received the phone call from Penelope Garcia to inform you that Spencer was in the hospital.

They called it intracranial bleeding, his brain was swelling, bleeding; shutting down. They’d told you there was nothing they could do.

How cruel this life had been to you. It had stolen Spencer away from you when your relationship barely had a chance to blossom. It had brought him back into your life, for the two of you to fall back in love with each other only to have one final year together.

It had been the greatest year of your life and you had to try and focus on that as David Rossi read his eulogy. 

He spoke all about Spencer’s life, the life you’d barely gotten to be a part of. Hearing it second hand and not from Spencer’s lips was tragic enough in itself. 

You didn’t really feel as though you belonged here. You didn’t know him the way his team members knew him. You felt like a stranger in this place now. 

You’d jumped at moving to DC when you and Spencer reunited because there was no way you were making the same mistake twice and letting him get away again. But now DC seemed like a suddenly very lonely place. 

As the brilliant man you knew and loved was being lowered into the ground, his final resting place, the heavens opened. The rain cascaded down from the sky and you couldn’t help but think how apt it was on this already bleak day. 

Garcia came to you at his graveside when the ceremony was over. The rain disguised your tears. She nudged you with her shoulder, her own tears falling.

“The world is going to be a very different place without boy genius in it.” she sobbed as she spoke.

“You’re telling me.” you chewed your lip, your eyes locked on his headstone as you spoke. 

“He loved you know? He always loved you.”

You nodded statically not looking at the other woman. You knew he loved you, that much you were sure of. You only wished you had more time. 

Maybe if you’d know what life had in store you would have come with him to DC all those years ago. Had you known you didn’t have all the time in the world, that your love only had a finite number of days you might have been more inclined to cling to them.

That was hindsight though you supposed and dwelling on it didn’t change the past. What was done was done. You didn’t go to DC with him, you stayed in Vegas. You spent years pining over him only to have the universe throw you back together again. 

And then he’d been snatched from you once more in the most horrific way. And now it was over for good.

“Come on Y/N, you’ll catch a cold if you stay out here.” Garcia placed a gentle arm on your shoulder.

“I’ll be right there.” you told her, still not looking away from where the love of your life was buried beneath the dirt.

You heard her leave as more tears started to fall from your eyes. Your knees gave out and you fell to the grass in the rain. 

You sobbed into your hands, cursing life for being so unyielding. But there was nothing you could do about it. The wheels had been set into motion long before you and Spencer had even met. This was always the way things were going to end up. Fate was a cruel mistress. 

And so you knelt in the dirt sobbing next to the grave of the love of your life, under the grey, weeping silken sky.  

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