#and not even mentioning the fact that he could get a puncture ����

[skitskatdacat63]

Vettonso complaining about each other not respecting schrondinger's track limits on the radio compilation + Seb's commentary that made me a bit feral

Must include these sexy ass pics okay, it makes me feral how hard they race each other.

Also SO upset that we got this vid and there's also pictures(and presumably a vid out there somewhere) of Fernando, back then, ALSO debriefing this race. And yet we never got them together?????? Evil. Fucked up.

Imagine seeing them complaining about each other but also having to (begrudgingly if you're Fernando) compliment each other IN FRONT of each other. Maybe its a good thing it doesn't exist, bcs then I'd have a heart attack.

[tojisun]

!! nsfw; poly 141 ; sexting; fem reader

price gets a video, a measly six-second thing, from ghost.

he's used to getting all sorts of messages from his lieutenant, but a video has never been a part of them.

it was always soap who sends them videos upon videos—saved videos of things that make him lose his shit or links that are his new turn-ons. price even gets personal messages from the fella; sometimes it's his sergeant venting in lilted scottish, sent to price's personal number on a drunken whim, and sometimes they're videos of him pleading.

"sir, please... wanna cum."

kyle is still getting used to the dynamic. he's still a little shy, hesitant, although he seemed to be getting more bold in text. more pushy. descriptive.

then there's ghost. he is a whole different beast from the other two because instead of begging, instead of putting price above his own pleasure, he backs the captain into a corner, pushing him close to the edge with little taunts and teases.

price remembers the first time ghost has done it. he sent the captain a picture of a lacey panties hanging off of ghost's jean pockets, the rouge of the soft material drawing price's eyes to the distinct tent in his lieutenant's pants, leaving his throat dry. he remembers fisting his own cock at the image, mind running because of ghost's anecdote—

"you would like her."

john had never cum so fast when masturbating, and yet there he was, twitching on his office chair, chest heaving as ragged rasps of breaths passed through his clenched teeth.

"your girlfriend's got a good taste," price had messaged back.

"and me?" was what ghost replied with.

"you already know," price sent. then, "you always know how to make your captain proud."

that correspondence might have been what pushed ghost to keep sending more messages. more taunts. more teasing images that had price rubbing himself in any smidgen of a private corner he could find because simon was never one to disappoint.

so this video had set john's blood on fire, heat scorching from his spine and pooling towards his twitching cock. hairline fractures fill the sides of his phone's screen, leaving rainbow lines filing his eyes at every reflection of the light.

ghost had always liked to share you to him. price knew for a fact that simon had never sent pictures of you to the others—"need your permission first, sir."—but he also thought that simon had drawn the line there. that while he was eager to share snapshots of your pretty little lingeries or the way you marked up simon's tanned skin with deep punctures of what john knows must be straight teeth, simon was not going to indulge john any more.

and yet.

he feels his lungs burn. trembling fingers reach to play the video.

the sound of your squealed moans bouncing against the walls was what he registers first. ghost has you on your knees, and john traces the way simon's got a chokehold on the back of your neck. john watches as ghost uses it as a leverage, tugging you back to his cock—his pelvis is pressed flush against the fat of your ass, and price feels his gums throb with the need to sink his teeth into your flesh at seeing the ripples of your fat bunch up against the bulk of simon's muscles.

"si! si!" you sobbed, muffled as you have your head burrowed into the pillows. your hands are useless by your sides, limp and incapable of even fisting the sheets.

"s'right," simon's voice echoed from behind the screen. "show cap'n how you love moanin' my name."

simon's mention of john has him jolting, his breaths stuttering once again.

he thought this little thing they have was a secret. a dirty, little, desperate secret that only he and ghost had the privilege of knowing. the immorality of it had always pushed john to his orgasm faster than his every rub, and he thought that it would all change the moment you know.

but this is a better treat.

it's a feast.

because john sees it for what it is—a promise.

the video ends, reminding john how short it really was. but he is addicted, unable to let go now that he's been given a taste of what will be.

the next time he replays the video, he's got his erect cock in his hand.

he snaps a picture of his cum-filled palm and sends it to simon. he writes, "show her what she does to me."

it takes twenty-three seconds for simon's reply to come in. it isn't a message but a voicenote—"am i a good girl, cap'n?"

"yeah," john records himself say. "so, so good f'r us, doll."

—

sorta pt 02

[0oolookitsme]

Baby, We're Fireproof

Yes bestie, you are on the right blog and yes, I did write some angst!! Hahaha hope you enjoy!

Verse - Singer!Harry x CEO!Y/n

Word Count - 2.1k

Warnings - some insane making-out at the end ;)

Harry has been writing an album, and while Y/n wants to go easy on him, she just can't adjust to his absence and the fact that he has abandoned their relationship. But Harry is quick to realise his fault and remind her that they're fireproof.

In the quiet of the night, Y/n found herself tangled in a web of thoughts, questioning her feelings curled up into a ball on the huge bed.

Harry was yet again, not home. It had been a week since he started coming home later and later. He said it was because he was very close to finishing his new album, and Y/n wasn't quite sure if he realised that whatever he was doing out there, was beginning to put a strain on their relationship.

She wanted to be mature and let him be, knowing his profession was way different from hers. But the question, 'would he have adjusted like this, for this long?' plagued her thoughts.

The corners of her eyes were moist, and she only felt smaller and smaller as the night rolled on. It was pouring outside and even though the balcony was closed, Y/n could still hear the noise, and it only made her more aware of the static silence looming in the house right now.

She wanted to stop thinking so much, knowing that she was going to reach conclusions even she wouldn't believe herself in her right mind. But when she closed her eyes, sleep didn't come and when she opened them, Harry still wasn't sliding into the bed, next to her.

But she must've dozed off amidst her misery because she woke up the next morning with Harry's body tangled with hers, with his head in the crook of her neck, one arm under her head while the other one remained draped across her stomach and his legs twisted like ivy around hers.

She was sweating profusely. So, she got right up and lowered the AC's temperature so that Harry wouldn't wake up drenched like her. Surprisingly, there was no sleep in her eyes. She felt as awake as she'd been in the early hours of the morning.

Climbing down the stairs with nothing going on inside her head, she got herself a hot glass of water with some added lemon juice and went to sit on the sofa in the living room showcasing the sunrise.

Her shoulders were tense, eyes dry and unmoving. She knew there was going to be an argument between the two of them when he'd wake up. But that's okay, because they truly needed to talk this out before things went spiralling a little too far.

She was ready to sort this out and get the tension over with, but she still had that nagging feeling that he might leave the house without bidding her goodbye, leaving behind a mere note mentioning that he loved her and would miss her in the studio, while she'd be in the shower, preparing herself to sit and talk to him.

But that wasn't going to happen today -- she wouldn't let it.

Soft pads of footsteps perked her ears up, but she didn't turn to see him. She just knew that he was rubbing his eye with a knuckle, something that she'd want to disapprove of him for and he would make the faces at her that she found ridiculously funny and had grown to love.

But then she felt warm hands press against her eyelids, closing them and a mouth breathing near the nape of her neck.

"Why are you sitting down here, hm?" He spoke rather quietly, as if not wanting to disturb the peaceful silence. But the rasp in his voice definitely punctured it.

"I think we need to talk," softly, she held his hands and lowered them so they sat intertwined with hers, upon her collarbones. "Please," she whispered, her tone begging him to listen to her and not distract her.

But he was seemingly working well because her eyelids were still shut.

"Well, we can after I have some cuddles with you," he pushed the topic under the rug, knowing that once they'd be done, the both of them would probably be running late.

"No, H," Y/n said sternly, eyes flying open as she pulled on his arm for him to come in front of her and sit. She didn't say much when he just sat on the coffee table in front, opening her legs and putting his closed ones in the space between.

"Say," he said, his eyes set on hers with a nonchalant expression, but Y/n could read the tension in every flexed muscle of his arm and the tightness in his set jaw.

Y/n took a deep breath then. The only thing easing her nerves was the earnest look in his eyes, like he was willing to sit and actually sort this out.

"Don't you think that we haven't really been spending any time together, as of lately?" She spoke just as slowly as her breathing was.

He only nodded at that, albeit little tensely, urging her on.

"I feel that that has been putting a strain on our relationship."

He was still for a couple seconds, or maybe minutes, Y/n wasn't sure.

"I feel the same, babe, I truly do feel the same."

Y/n sensed a but coming, so she didn't speak.

"But I can't really help it, not for a while," he sighed, and Y/n's gaze lost the softness that had been glazing her eyes.

"You're writing an album, and I'm willing to understand how tough and exhausting that must be, but you can't just abandon us for that," she spoke with nods and shakes of her head, her voice rising a level higher.

Harry opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

"I've really been trying to be easy and not go on biting at you for not spending each breath of yours beside me, and it should've been easy but it's not because," she stopped to take a breath, one that shuddered. "Because you used to do that, and now you're suddenly not and I'm sorry that I haven't adjusted to it as quickly as you have!" Her brows rose, adding to her words like she was trying her all to make him see the point.

"And I understand if that's too much to ask from you right now, but at least speak with me or spend some time with me because this is a relationship, Harry!" She wanted to stand up and to pace around, but his hands were on her knees, and she didn't want that loss of contact.

Taking a breath to calm herself a little, she crossed her fingers with his again. "It's like we're mere roommates," she began, looking into his tired eyes, noticing his dark circles for the first time.

She didn't even know when they'd first appeared.

"I didn't realise that," he took a breath as if it was suddenly hard for him to speak. "I didn't realise that, that - that's what I'd been doing," with slumped shoulders, he lowered his gaze.

"But I -- you didn't put in any extra effort, either," he insisted, shrugging his shoulders. "You could've visited me at the studio or asked me to stay for a while longer or - or, I don't know!" He finished frustratedly, flailing his arms.

"Oh?" She said before thinking, then took a long breath. "Alright, I agree that I should've done that. That this isn't a one sided thing since it takes two hands to clap," -- she slumped back, crossing her legs -- "but wasn't it you who left while I was bathing, not even bothering to bid me goodbye for the day? Or to send a text mentioning that you were going to be late or that you were ordering food in the studio itself?" She almost suggested.

"I'm sorry about that, I wasn't thinking straight," he said clearly, rubbing her knuckles with his thumb.

"So why did you begin kissing me and fucking me every time that I tried to bring up the issue?" She said, maybe a bit more roughly that she'd intended.

"I wasn't doing it to shut you down, the hell?" He looked as if she'd accused him of robbery. "It was just mere coincidence! Yes, I should've stopped when you began to talk but you fell into me as well, didn't you?" He was standing up now, a frown settled deep between his ungroomed brows.

"I missed you every second I spent away from you, it was you who I was thinking about constantly so pardon me if I was exhausted out of my mind and wanted to spend some time with you!"

Y/n gaze was the guilty one now. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that," she accepted, her throat too dry for her to gulp.

"I just, I can't believe you'd think so low of me," he sighed. "But it's alright, okay? I know we were both frustrated and not thinking straight," he sat back down and held her hands again.

With his thumb and index finger, he softly gripped her chin to coax her eyes into meeting his. 

"Forgive me? I promise I will never write songs about you again," his frown turned into a grin, and he leaned in to hold her gaze when she broke a smile that melted into laughter.

"I hate you," she mumbled, moving to sit in his lap with her arms wrapped around his shoulders, uncaring about the risk of the coffee table holding their weight unsuccessfully.

"Yeah, I forgive you as well," he chuckled, pressing a chaste kiss upon the lobe of her ear.

"Just, don't forget me," she sighed, wrapping her legs around his waist when he picked her up.

"I really made you think a lot of things, didn't I?" He spoke like he was apologising. "I'm really sorry, love."

He was carrying her up the stairs when she pulled away from the nape of his neck to look at him. "I'm sorry too," she said genuinely, holding his gaze.

"It's okay," he whispered, opening the door to their bedroom by pushing against it with his back before he pushed her onto the bed, climbing in after her and bringing with him the blanket which he wrapped the both of them in, holding her tight against him before he whisked himself away to hold his phone.

"Let's take today off, but don't forget to bring in fresh ideas, tomorrow then!" He said into the recorder and sent the voice message, sliding his phone in his bedside drawer then and lying back down, facing Y/n.

They stared at each other for a little, before Harry broke a smile, making one crack on Y/n's mouth as well. “Baby, we’re fireproof,” he said, smugly grinning, and making her laugh. 

"Kiss me, you fool," she gritted with a scrunched nose, grinning widely until Harry hurried to seal their mouths together, the force causing her to move her head back a bit. 

His scent suddenly filled all of her senses, him being all that she could see, feel, hear, and smell. The same vanilla scent with a light hint of some cinnamon and some woody scent that she’d been missing so terribly.  

His tongue fought against hers until she gave up and he finally had the full access to her mouth. His breath hot against her skin bringing tingles under her skin, and making blood rush to her cheeks and fireworks erupt inside of her. 

Backing away to catch his breath, Harry let out a hoarse chuckle when she came forward in the chase of his lips, causing their noses to smush. Licking his lips, he looked at her mouth for a second too long, seeing a kiss she always let him steal. Cupping the back of her head, he pushed her mouth to his’, relishing in the feeling of just how down bad he felt for her. 

Slowly, he pushed her until her back was flush against the mattress and he was hovering above her, his dainty necklace resting on her neck as he claimed her mouth again, his palms slipping under his shirt that she’d been wearing and making their way around her body without much hesitation due to the map of her body inscribed among the lines on them. 

Her back arched off the bed, pressing her abdomen against his’ while his knee parted her thighs to press up against her core. And as she slumped down into the mattress, the friction between her legs had her swaying her hips for more. 

His hands grazed around her abdomen and stomach, caressing her back before he realised that she didn’t have a bra on. Groaning into her mouth, he pulled back to catch his breath. 

Still heaving, a smirk pulled the right corner of his mouth upwards. 

“Look at you, getting mad at me just because I was writing too many songs about you in the studio,” he teased, and before he could’ve taken another breath, his eyes rolled back as she pulled on the curls near the nape of his neck, and pushed him right back to her mouth once a breath or two had filled their lungs. 

[rintoshis-archived]

𝐊𝐈𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐒 '𝐍 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒 - ft. hobie brown / spiderpunk

🎸、 . *. ⋆ warnings; mentions of blood, profanities, 'breakup', makeup sex-ish, slight angst, vaginal penetration, no p in v, biting, mentions of piercings (hobie), poor attempt at British slang, parents in house, lmk if there's more! ✧. word count: 935

The rapid knocking on your window didn't falter even from the stormy weather that the sky was going through. The clock strikes 1:34 am, the light shining on the figure that was trying to get in by your window.

''Let me in... I know 'ya see me...'' The shadow had spikes on top of its head, and a guitar strapped on its back. The voice echoes from your window, only urging you to open the door. The raspiness and toned sound gave you an idea of who it was.

''Holy fuck, Hobie what the hell-'' His body fell on your carpet, limp and covered with bruises and cuts. His suit was busted, the fabric was ripping at the arms and the seams were threatening to open.

''What happened? Speak to me, Hobie.'' You quickly scooped his upper body to lean against your bed frame. You run towards your bathroom to grab a cloth and wet it with warm tap water. Your hands rummage through the cabinets, finding the band-aids and Betadine.

You approach Hobie's wet body on your rug, clearly swinging around the city while it was thundering. Someone didn't check the weather forecast... But you set that thought aside and wiped off the blood pooling on his cheek.

''I'm fine, babe.'' ''Don't call me that.'' Your words only seemed to puncture Hobie's ego rather than his body. ''Why not? Doncha love it?'' Your hands were a lot denser on his skin before he used the corny nickname on you. You and Hobie weren't so 'peachy' after that incident in one of his shows.

''Loosen' up, doll.'' Hobie's hand rests on your cheek, pushing away the stray hair strand from your face. Your hands swat his away and occupied themselves in getting the bandaids and the Betadine. ''Just cause I'm taking care of you now, doesn't solve our relationship, Brown.''

Your sudden call of his last name shot a bullet through his heart. He knew you were tough to crack, but if he had to go on his knees for you to forgive him he gladly would.

''Brown? What happened to 'Bee' or 'Love'-'' ''It died, Hobie.'' You put the last bandaid on his cheek, your face inching closer to his. His breath fanning on your nose and his eyes only piercing through yours.

''You wouldn't be doing this if you didn't love me.'' His words made your hands pinch his ear, a small frown appearing on your face. ''I'm only doing this because we're...'' Your words only faded away from the sudden thought of what you and Hobie were.

You didn't like labels yourself. But Hobie was the only one who could actually play your heart and make a tune. As corny as it sounds, Hobie didn't help the banging of your heart in your ribcage.

His eyes were looking directly at yours, winking at your cute frown. ''Friends?'' You pinched his ear again and rose up from his side. ''Bastard.'' Your words lightened his mood, but the spark remains.

Hobie stands up from your floor and follows your figure in the bathroom. His hand trails across your waist, your two reflections being seen in front of the mirror. Your hands grip the ceramic, letting Hobie corner you between the sink.

''If you didn't love me... You wouldn't let me do this, wouldn't 'ya?'' Hobie's hands slide under your pajamas, his hands pawing at your panties. ''Hobie...'' His free hand makes your way to yours, caging your hand in his.

''Mm, yeah? 'Ya know my name. Say it.'' His fingers set your panties aside, collecting your essence from your slit. A small moan comes out of your mouth. Your hand covers your mouth from spilling any more sound.

'''Bee, parents-' Hobie knew that your parents were in your home. In fact, a part of you thinks he came here for that sole purpose. ''I know, I know. Keep quiet for me, yeah? You can do that for me, can't you?'' You bite your palm once Hobie enters his fingers inside of your cunt, your juices pooling at your panties.

Your moans are muffled by your hand, his thumb toying with your clit. ''You like that, don't 'cha?'' His words enter your right ear, his hot breath tickling the shell of your ear. His cold rings hit your hot skin, and the sudden temperature change gave you goosebumps.

Even due to how odd it sounds, Hobie knew how to toy with your body just right. The way his fingers curl and crook inside of you, the pace of shapes circling on your sensitive clit, him pinching your nipples. He had known your anatomy more than you thought he did.

''Mm, right there?'' He was teasing you, the way your body shook under his touch only proved the impact he had on you. You could only moan for a response, your eyes closed at the knot tightening in your stomach.

Your hands let go of the cold ceramic of the sink, holding Hobie's hands through the fabric of your pajamas. ''Close? I can feel you. Fuck, so tight. Squeezing my fingers.'' Hobie kisses your neck, the cold metal of his piercings only made his sloppy kisses more pleasurable.

He bites the skin of your shoulders, ''Wanna keep me inside of you forever?'' You could only nod your head frantically, your legs close shakily. ''Cum for me.'' His words led you to your orgasm, your sweaty bodies sticking to each other from the heat of the moment.

''You know you love me.'' He grabs your chin and kisses your swollen lips.

the thoughts in my head with hobie only spiraled to this mess. i hope you guys enjoy this either way:) ‧₊˚ ⋅ fusaes 2023 do not copy

[sylus-doll]

Synopsis: Sylus has always lived a lonely life, unfamiliar with pleasant company. Being with you again is something he must get used to. He's learning how to, and so are you.

Warnings: Lowkey doesn't make sense because the author is exhausted but wanted to churn something out for you guys. Also mentions of blood. Might be a little angsty.

Author's note: I've gotten busy recently, so I won't be able to write as often. Sorry! I come bearing lowkey dependant Sylus. Comments and reblogs are appreciated! <3

Throughout his life, Sylus has spent all his time alone. No one would count enemies as company, even if they do trail him and keep an eye on his every move. They were the ones who wanted to see him fall off his throne; cause and spectate his suffering. A walking target. Sure, he had Mephisto and the twins he took under his wing... But could a mechanical bird count as a friend? Or a pair of twins who work directly under him, following his commands? No, that is obedience.

Sylus did not have anyone to call his own. No one to trade secrets with or share his warmth. And in turn it has made him cold, self-reliant, for he cannot trust in another person. He had never learned how. But he takes comfort in the teachings he does know— the ones of his only love. Melodies dance in the air, a comforting tune. He attempts to hum along, taking pride in the fact that he is able to unlike the past. A respite he is allowed to have in this harsh world.

When the both of you are reunited— albeit, unknowingly on your part— Sylus is at a loss. He had thought that you, too, would remember the past just as he did. Yet you stare into his eyes with the guarded malice of a stranger. It is a gaze he should be used to by now. And he is... Just not from you. Where has his beloved's familiar softness gone? Only your fierce claws and teeth remain. Sylus does not know how to fix this. He was never taught to build relationships or tenderly lower defenses with the patience of a saint.

Your relationship is rocky at first; like oil and water. Both of your lives are completely different from the other. With the Hunter Association actively hunting down Sylus, whatever you have with him is illegal. Forbidden. Although... Surely they would not mind if you stuck around? Gathering intel for them could be useful in the future. This is fine, you are simply using him, you are not delusional. Humans have always desired for what they cannot have.

“You're sticking around for intel on Onychinus? Well then, be my guest. Don't be shy when using me.” Sylus's sardonic smile is etched into your mind.

He tells no one that being of use to you is the only way he knows how to keep you close to him.

Be disgusted, you will yourself. Be repulsed, resent him for all he has done and will do. You will only come to regret being so entangled with his life. This is insane and you are supposed to be a good, law-abiding citizen of Linkon. A hunter. Yet you cannot help feeling like prey— engulfed by a predator who kills and comes back to you with blood soaked hands. Most times, even his own. How will you ever learn to hate someone who learned to be vulnerable with you?

Over time, you start to notice that Sylus is quite... lonely. You are the only one who checks up on him, through text or call. The only one who visits, who teases and jokes, who surprises. You, you, you. Comfortable and happy with someone so dangerous. So of course he eventually craves your presence in your absence. Sylus will make up whatever excuse, put himself in any situation, just to be able to spend some time with you. When it ends, he is distraught.

“You're abandoning me when I'm no longer useful to you? Your skill in being heartless is assuring.” His tone is teasing, as always. But his eyes hold a far-off melancholy.

It feels as though your heart has been punctured with shattered pieces of a fragile thing.

“Abandon? You're sorely mistaken. Useful or not, you're stuck with me, you have no other choice.” You reach out, grabbing his hand.

Something new for Sylus to learn; that you will not throw him away when he does not serve any purpose to you. You are his companion— his beloved who cares for and loves him. Not because you owe him or as an obligation. Simply because you do. And you are both still learning. It will be okay. Having each other means neither of you will ever have to face the cruelties of this world alone.

[throwaway-yandere]

FLAWLESS (Yandere!Various Genshin/Reader)

A/n: This is a complete interactive fic w/ CGs! There’s an HP system and 4 possible endings (yandere!Scaramouche, Alhaitham, Kaveh, and Kazuha). This is my final fanfic and I really put my best effort into drawing and writing this. Have fun!!! Your choices matter so read the evidences properly and try not to get a bad ending hahaha. (Pls answer this poll after and feel free to send me memes about who you got hAHHAHA)

Unreliable Synopsis: (Danganronpa!Genshin AU) If this is your last dance as an idol, then you do not want it. No. You’ll make the real criminal sing instead.

CW: yandere themes, blood, murders (well duh ansy–), and brief mentions of suicide.

Kazuha frowned. "For (L/n) (Y/n), this whole ordeal must seem like a flawless crime."

"They don't know the murder weapon, the suspects— no nothing." Kaveh sighed.

Alhaitham interjected. "Indeed, but the real questions will begin in a moment."

Words punctured the air in nameless accusations. Each time people enter this room, only distrust looms acting both as a safety blanket and suffocating plastic. You stared at the people left. One, two, three, four, five... You clenched your fist, and all those fingers pointed back at you. 

The sixth. 

There are only six survivors left.

"Say, (L/n) (Y/n)." Your Akademiyan companions stared at you as Kunikuzushi’s smirk could practically be heard in his voice. "Where were you at the time of the murder?"

You gulped.

The Teyvat Akademiya. Home only to the most renowned student of their craft. The faculty carefully picks out select groups of students to be their new freshmen- and it can only be counted by hand how many had declined such a generous offer. It was a government state university, but it was also a golden ticket to knowing people from high places.  

Each student was known for contributing something in their fields of interest. In fact, both your adoptive siblings were alumni of this prestigious school. Your brother Aether was a famous "adventurer" (as he loved to call himself instead of an artifact-obsessed archeologist) whereas your sister Lumine was a remarkable swordswoman with a straight-edged track record. Even your older friends, Dainsleif, and a certain glasses-wearing individual you had forgotten the name of were graduates and now boast incredible resumes befitting of an Akademiyan. Each alumnus you've met wasn't someone any person with a head on their shoulders would dare disrespect. 

But that was not the reason for your schoolmates’ evident intimidation.

“Allow them a moment to process,” Alhaitham scoffed. “The Body Discovery Announcement was approximately 2 hours ago. It’s challenging for individuals from the entertainment industry such as them to comprehend complicated matters in a few seconds.”

“I would’ve fainted at your rare attempt at empathy if it wasn't obviously pointed,” Kaveh scoffed before turning to you with a soft stare. “(Y/n), don’t listen to these two, I’m sure we can find out if you’re innocent or not later.”

You gave a short nod of assent.

Tragically, murders had become the norm for college students like yourself. No one has flinched at Kaveh’s grim mention of a suspect lurking by and none had the insanity to deny what had occurred.

It began when you first woke up in one of the Akademiya's classrooms. You stirred awake on a desk near Shikanoin Heizou, the "Detective Prince". He was a famous figure, so you instantly believed him when he said you were both hauled into this location against your will. You were enthused by his infectious desire to uncover whatever was behind the “kidnapping” you found yourselves in. He told you not to worry, that despite the barred windows and inaccessible exits, you'd both "probably" find a way out.  As you both wandered around the area, you found fourteen other students (some familiar faces, some not as much). For a brief moment of hope, everyone thought escape was possible. 

That was until a certain cold-eyed puppet entered the scene.

A heartless puppet you’re sure was waiting for everyone just under that elevator.

“Is… Is this everyone?” You asked like a mouse, frightened as your eyes darted for any hints of twinned cyan hair. Nothing about your recent behavior had gone unnoticed.

Senior Faruzan is missing…

Yoimiya frowned, grabbing your hand for comfort. “(Y/n)…”

Kunikuzushi scoffed. “Enough of this dumb ohhh boohoo exhibit. Let’s go.”

The most mysterious of the bunch left for the stairs immediately, punching the button on the elevator to its ground floor. Yoimiya huffed, muttering complaints about Kuni’s behavior while the three other men followed her silently. No one took the stairs two at a time and walked at a snail’s pace. A clear indication that no one wanted this to occur. 

And just like in the previous cases, Kazuha’s eyes were on you the entire time but spoke nothing of this behavior.

The elevator door opened. You looked at the camera above it. If the Shogun's words are to be trusted, then the outside world is watching your every move like reality TV.

If that's the case, might as well give them a show.

Kunikuzushi stepped aside, royally ushering everyone— and specifically YOU— in.

“Idols first.”

Everyone entered the trial room. If the mood from earlier was tense, it is worse now that you’re inside. Stepping into the cold room makes the situation all the more real.

There is an execution waiting to happen, but without a hint if it’ll be “us” or “them”. Every bright person inside the room here had previously partaken in 4 of these court sessions by force. Since no one can exit the premises nor contact the outside world, the only key out was to kill and avoid getting caught. 5 people had attempted to commit murder, and considering how you’re still breathing, none of the “blackened” had succeeded in getting their way.

How… How did it come to this? 

You enrolled in the Akademiya in hopes that you'd also find the subtle clues as to why Aether went missing, this wasn't in your plan.

Getting roped into this killing “game” was on no one’s to-do list. You received an invitation to enroll in the Akademiya because of your stark idol career, although your siblings being famous alumni may have greatly increased your chances of receiving that privilege. You would’ve thrown that paper into the fire if you knew you’d get dizzy upon arriving in the Akademiya and will wake up in such a heartbreaking dilemma. Hearing from a grapevine, you discovered that Kaveh was invited for his architectural drafts, Kazuha for his poems and a bit of swordsmanship in his repertoire, Yoimiya for her firework shows, and Kunikuzushi?… You don’t know. But you are wholly aware as to why Alhaitham is here as your senior— you were there when he opened his letter after all.

The “mascot” is yet to make her entrance. So, as “obedient” students, you’ve uncomfortably shuffled to the places you were meant to stand. Bile rose inside your throat as you looked at the last five students excluding yourself circling the room— with Faruzan’s crossed-out portrait to your right while Kamisato Ayaka’s on your left. It would appear that most of the dead students were on your side and the closest breathing person next to you was Kunikuzushi, who was two photographs away.

Alhaitham, Amber, Tighnari, Ajax, Albedo, Kamisato Ayaka, You, Faruzan, Xiao, "Kunikuzushi", Kaveh, Cyno, Yoimiya, Layla, Yunjin, Kaedehara Kazuha, and Shikanoin Heizou.

The deceased faces had been crossed out in bright violet paint, a nauseatingly unsubtle reminder that only six remained. Yet, the one that was meant to sit towering above was missing.

“… Where’s The Shogun?” Kazuha asked.

“Ah, so you do have a voice. And here I was about to call you a cricket. I thought our poet lost his words, considering how the previous trial ended,” Kunikuzushi mocked, rolling his eyes. “Just wait and see.”

You sighed, hoping it was quiet enough for Kuni not to have heard it. 

The last trial broke everyone’s spirits and sense of camaraderie the most. Before trials, the puppet gives everyone an incentive to kill. In the Ayaka-Heizou murder case, each student was given a videotape that raised more questions than answers. Yours was a clip of Lumine, your fellow theater actors, and idol mates congratulating you for your enrollment before it cuts off to a scene of your home burned to cinders. As for Ayaka, hers was a short-lived message of her older brother asking her to come visit the clan for Thoma’s upcoming birthday— before it cuts to a gruesome scene of her brother fatally wounded on their living room floor. 

“Find out what happens once you graduate!”... and then the tape ends.

Whoever was the mastermind behind this killing, you had to admit, they were an expert in psychological torture. And unfortunately for everyone, Ayaka was a smart individual— killing the most trustworthy student, Heizou, to cover her tracks better. She put up quite the fight in manipulating everyone to think that you and Kaveh were possible culprits.

You even got into an argument with the calmest person around. Kazuha was “convinced” that Ayaka was right, which led to you two entering an incredibly heated argument that left him depressed with his rejected apology. You were on "good terms" with him before, that being he would always offer to cook food and accompany you often. 

… Perhaps that was a good thing. Discreetly, you thought he strangely knew you to a degree that makes you far from comfortable. It still bugs you how he knew you all too well and yet you know nothing about him other than his aspirations: traditional Inazuman poetry writing with a bit of karuta on the side.

Maybe he used to be a big fan of yours? Even so, the foundation of your music, choreography, and persona was weaved through a tapestry of feel-good lies. And yet, he was wise enough to speak your true thoughts before you even hesitated to voice them in your cheery idol tone. 

But that’s not the issue right now. 

The issue on your plate was that you had no evidence to prove your innocence except for the list of school rules on your E-Handbook because you were convinced someone will kill you during the investigation.

You laughed to yourself bitterly. Might as well review those rules now.

You opened the E-Handbook.

As per “school rules”, there are regulations to be had in a murder game, but none stick to you as these three. Rule #10 and #7: A class trial will commence after three or more students have discovered a corpse, and a Body Discovery Announcement will play as soon as it occurs. However, a trial will be held if and only if every survivor is present; failure to do so will result in class “expulsion.” 

And the last rule that never left your mind was Rule #8: If the guilty party is exposed during the class trial, they alone will be executed.

By the end of Trial #4, she did not receive a proper execution. Ayaka was compelled to restore her honor and raised her sword to…

…

… You couldn’t hate her for it. Even though you were close friends with Heizou, you couldn’t hate any of your fellow students. They all had family, hopes, and visions for the future. Each one here was "a fledgling barely out of the nest." You couldn’t deny that you would’ve done the same.

"Since the Shogun isn't here yet, let's get a headstart," Kaveh gripped the court fence, eyeing everyone with a nervous stare and stiff posture. "What's your alibis?"

Nobody raised their voice initially. You cast a pitying glance toward Kaveh. When it comes to your closest friendships, he comes in second only to Heizou. As someone who had seen the horrors of the media which is essentially a mirror of the world's social issues, Kaveh's one of the few decent individuals left on the planet, in your opinion. In moments of quiet, you, Kaveh, and Faruzan used to chat together, with Heizou periodically interrupting to share his findings regarding everyone's entrapment.

Considering how Kaveh is your last true friend left, you volunteered yourself.

"I never left my room," you spoke audibly depressed, no longer caring that you appeared un-idol-like. "And I refused entry as well. I heard a couple of angry knocks at 9:37 p.m., but I didn't open my door for anyone."

You looked at Kazuha, hurt and accusingly.

You'd never forget how Kazuha called you a murderer. That intense argument made up 30% of Heizou's class trial. He lost his composure and called you a "dishonorable monster". The whole back-and-forth was very much unlike him. After the trial, neither of you talked– and you never left your room unless it was to get something to eat without anyone in sight.

If he was the one who killed Faruzan because he can’t get to you, then you’ll…

"9:37 eh? You got a watch now?" Kunikuzushi pointed at your wrist.

You snapped out of your aggression and nodded, which made him break out in a fit of laughter. 

"HAHAHA!!!" Kunikuzushi grinned, wide. "Learned your lesson, huh?!"

You scoffed, but your ego was humbled and your heart sank at his harsh words. 

Everyone in the room nearly lost their lives because of your time-blindness. It's precisely what made Kazuha suspicious of your motives. You were always unsure of the time, hence, you didn't have the most watertight alibi compared to Ayaka. Before you entered your room to lock yourself, Alhaitham blocked the door with his shoe and handed you his spare wristwatch. He was the last person you saw before your self-isolation.

"Good," Alhaitham said. "And you, Kunikuzushi?"

"Are we going to ignore that angry knocking thing?" Kaveh rightfully asked.

"Let's complete the first task first," Alhaitham answered. "Let's follow the circle; it's (Y/n), then Kunikuzushi, Kaveh, Yoimiya, Kazuha, then I."

"Conveniently putting yourself last," Kunikuzushi snarled. "But whatever. I was napping in my dorm. Woke up when I heard footsteps outside and decided to investigate. The discovery alarm rang off when I entered the nurse's office the second time."

Kaveh fell silent, his face pale.

"I… never went to m dorm that night"

"Oh?" You and Yoimiya curiously said in unison.

"I-I was with Alhaitham, patrolling!!!" Kaveh defended; his arms in the air. "I swear on my life, I was with him! We're probably the footsteps Kuni heard."

He spoke as if it was a good thing with his mouth, but he was whispering that it wasn’t with his eyes.

"Can't be certain," Kunikuzushi threw in a quick grumble and snapped his fingers. “But I think that's probably the case.”

"That makes sense. I mean, if Kuni was telling the truth then that just means there's more chance it's just those two hopping around. Oh, and I was actually on the second floor at the time. I was in the recreational room cause I wanted to get tokens for the cute little Shogun Stall.'' If Kuni’s side comment lasted a month, then Yoimiya's would be a year– but her good cheer is just what everyone needed to alleviate the tension.

"I wasn't in my dorm room either," Kazuha said. "I was in the cafeteria. I couldn't sleep so I decided to fry fish."

"True, I think. When I checked the cafeteria a knife was missing from the shelf."

"We’ll keep your fact-checking in mind, Miss Naganohara." 

No soul was sure if Alhaitham was being genuine about it except for you. And the answer was yes, he was being warily appreciative. Admittedly, you don’t know any of these people before this killing game started, except for one person…

Alhaitham looked away, conscious of how you looked at him.

In all fairness, Alhaitham was closer to Lumine than you and Aether, and he wasn’t your favorite neighbor either. As a kid, he was the type who would leave in the middle of hide-and-seek simply because the ordeal wasn’t “stimulating” to his developing intellect. He had a habit of causing uncomfortable situations just to “observe” your reactions with an emotionless stare. Alhaitham had once given you a sumeru rose with a startling grasshopper to see how you would behave, and the worst part is that everyone knows he did these without malice. His grandmother had to force a sorry out of him for your tears to dry. “He probably has a crush on you, you know how boys are,” was the excuse the old lady tried, but your twin siblings were quick to shut that thought down. You and he were simply oil and water, nothing more, nothing less.

But there were times you two got along. When you aired out loud sentiments regarding how stuffy his room must be, you snatched the book he was reading and dashed up the nearest tree. Despite his grumbling reservations, he was thankful that you taught him how to climb that afternoon. That was the first you saw him smile wider than usual and offered to narrate the book you stole: The Little Prince. 

However, that version of Alhaitham you’ve come to love remains awol amidst this killing game.

"As for my whereabouts: Kaveh is correct. He and I were patrolling just the first floor and exchanging conversation. Neither of us could sleep. We started at 9:15 and ended abruptly at 11:05, when we, along with Kunikuzushi, found–"

"The body." Kunikuzushi finished.

"Yes," Alhaitham said.

Kunikuzushi smirked. From your perspective, the worst part about this was not Kunikuzushi’s inappropriate smugness, but the look in his eyes that mirrored what Heizou used to have— what your good friend used to be. The light in his eyes, his more forward demeanor, the way he crossed his arms and snapped his fingers– it was as if he was copying him. 

Mocking him.

You hate Kunikuzushi. You detest just how much you don’t know why he’s in the Akademiya or anything else about him other than his first name. You loathe how he had made it his job to be the antagonist of every damn class trial. You hate how he looks at you as though you’re beneath him. You despise how much he is willing to withhold vital information till the very end.

Kunikuzushi is like a commedia dell’arte stock character. A Scaramouche. An unreliable servant. You can’t trust a man who said he was moved by your acting in all your filmography only to act like he wants nothing more than to crush your spirits once lives were at stake.

After listening to everyone’s alibis, your intuition screamed from something deep within a place you had begun to trust after experiencing these trials:

Out of six survivors, FOUR of them are hiding something.

“Is everyone present?”

Before you could speak up, a low and refined woman’s voice stole everyone’s attention. All turned to gaze at the long synthetic-haired lady with a katana by her side. She returned the stares with an unfathomable coldness as she strutted to her throne, the silk of her grand kimono touching the floor. 

There she is. The lone audience and judge. The puppet: the Almighty Raiden Shogun. Undoubtedly made of metal and not flesh. Xiao had learned that firsthand when he sacrificed his life in an honorable duel against the captor— but seeking freedom by force was of no use when she herself is capable of the murders she wished to witness.

“Very well. We shall begin.”

“W-Wait, hold up, ma'am!”

The last vaguely extroverted cheerleader raised her hand; her bravery to interrupt the Shogun was acknowledged.

“... Can I share my E-Handbook data with (Y/n)?” She asked, high-pitched.

The medical and criminological technology of this era eluded everyone. Trapped inside the Akademiya with no phones or any signal to the outside world, each student only has their E-Handbook to rely on. It contains information the owner investigated regarding murders and records testimonies made by their peers. A handbook is only “handy” for both people who were hoping to survive and those who were hoping to twist the facts. 

And that offer is exactly what you need.

“You see– they didn’t leave their room during the investigation period– probably worried that the killer might be after them next and they kinda turned into a hikikomori for the past few days. I’m kinda worried they wouldn’t be able to defend themselves on this trial so… So, uh… Pretty please?” The blonde girl smiled nervously.

The Raiden Shogun stared, calculating.

“I shall allow it.”

“Thank you so much!” Yoimiya tapped her E-Handbook as fast as she could, more eager than you were in watching the loading screen fill up.

(SYSTEM: RECEIVING NAGANOHARA YOIMIYA’S E-HANDBOOK DATA…)

(SYSTEM: TRANSFER COMPLETE.)

You smiled at Yoimiya but it came out crooked and jaded. She didn’t complain that you weren’t at your top form today, but she did send you a loud “Do your best!” in her native tongue.

The Shogun walked to the throne and took her seat.

“Now then, let the class trial begin.”

Out like a bolt of lightning, the doors behind you were completely shut with metal bars in her flick of a wrist. In her twisted form of justice, she hammered the circular surface with her gavel.

“Court is now in session.”

(SYSTEM: TAP HERE TO CONTINUE)

[secretly-tumb1r]

Roadtrip - hotch x reader part 2

part one

summary: when hotch finally sheds his stubbornness, he decides to drive back to Quantico from New York, in an attempt to rest his punctured eardrum. You couldn’t leave him without company, so you join him.

warnings: 18+ MDNI, age gap (hotch in his late 40s reader in her late 20s), unprotected sex (p in v) oral (fem receiving), no mentions of haley

a/u: thank you guys so much for the support on the first part of this, you’re all so so sweet💞 i truly hope you enjoy this part too💞 xoxo

masterlist

You’ve kissed people before, but never like Aaron. It was almost like you had been starved of his taste, and him of yours. The kiss was so rough and angry, angry at the fact you didn’t do this earlier. If you knew it would be this good, you would’ve jumped his bones the minute you saw him.

There was no doubt he was more experienced than you, he was a lot older too, but right now, you were both just as starved and as messy and impatient as the other.

The kiss was so impactful, you could feel your arousal start to pool in your panties. Looking for any sort of relief, you start grinding on his crotch, giving you easy access to it since you were straddling him while he was laying down. You could feel him get harder by the second and that only made you moan in his mouth.

He gently bit your lower lip as he moved down to kiss your jawline and lower to your neck, finding that sweet spot that made you arch your back and drop your jaw in a silent moan.

His lips explored your body as they reached your covered breasts. Big hands cupped both your tits as both index and thumb fingers pinched and rolled your nipples.

“fuck a-aaron”

“i know baby i know”

“please please” you were a moaning mess above him. He flipped you on your back so now he was on top of you, a coy smirk plastered on his face.

“what is it baby hm? cmon use your words sweetie”

the pet names made you wetter (if that was even possible) you needed him now.

“please f-fuck me aaron”

he chuckled deeply, laughing at how desperate you were. His hands moved down from your breasts to your lower stomach. He lowered himself on the bed on his stomach as he began to kiss your inner thighs.

“awh poor baby” he rubbed a finger on your clothed cunt, arousal seeping through it. “so wet” he looks mesmerised by your glossy panties. “all this for me huh baby?” you shook your head frantically and moaned, giving him the answer he wanted.

“don’t worry sweetie i’ll make it better” his big fingers hooked around the hem of your panties as he ripped them off in a sudden movement, the cool air hitting your weeping cunt, making you clench around nothing.

He pecked your swollen clit, and looked up in your eyes to see your reaction. Your head was thrown back, your hair messy. A bead of sweat rolled down your forehead, your body already so hot even thought nothing had happened yet.

He ran his tongue up and down your slit, gaining a hiss from your throat. He groaned. “fuck honey, you taste amazing” He started flicking his tongue up and down, he was a starved man and this was his last mean. Suddenly he put his finger up to your lips “suck” you gladly took it in and swirled your tongue around the tip of his finger, he let out a shaky breath as your spit coated his finger. He took it out your mouth with a ‘pop’ and teased your entrance.

Just as you were about to complain he he inserted his finger in your cunt, knuckles deep. His fingers were far bigger from yours giving you a pleasure you were never able to give yourself.

“you think you can take another one baby?” you nodded frantically and a low chuckle escaped him. He stretched you open when he added another finger, pleasure building deep inside your stomach.

His head lowered to suck on your clit, his touch was addictive. “fuck- ‘m close!” he started to pump his fingers faster as he looked up at you making eye contact. He looked too pretty between your legs, hair messed up and nose up aganist your pelvic bone. You could come just at the sight. Your hand flew to his hair as you started grinding on his face. Suddenly you felt it. You let go all over his face.

When he came up, his face looked delicious soaked in your arousal. He licked his lips and fingers clean as he kissed you deeply, allowing you to taste yourself, “please aaron need you inside” you managed to croak out between kisses.

Your hands flew to his pants button, undoing it quickly. “someone’s eager” he laughed and you could only moan.

You could see his bulge through his boxers, he looked so big.

Your mouth watered at the sight as you pulled down his boxers, his cock springing out proudly, leaking with pre cum.

“lay down baby” his gentle voice awakened something inside you, and you couldn’t help but do as he said.

His lips found your neck again as he aligned his tip with your entrance making you tense up. “relax honey” his hand started circling your nipple.

He finally thrusted into you, letting you accommodate to his size. He was massive, bigger than anyone else you’ve ever been with.

He started to move, picking out his pace, slow but steady. “aaron- faster please” you pleaded.

“oh you like it rough huh?” he cocked his eyebrow up. He flips you on your stomach pressing his large hand on your lower back to make your back arch.

You were a moaning mess. He rammed his cock in your pussy at an ungodly pace, hitting that spongy spot inside that made you mewl.

Aaron wasn’t the one to come quickly, but your sweet noises accompanied by the noises your sweet pussy was making around his cock was like a symphony, music to his ears.

His hands dug into your hips so hard he was sure it would leave marks. He wanted that. He wanted to mask you as his.

His strong hand moved to your front where he started circling your clit making you moan even louder.

“fu- aaron yes god! i’m gonna c-“ you interrupted yourself with pornographic moans.

“cmon baby let it go, make a mess on my cock.”

that was all you needed. You were sure you’d never had a better orgasm before, your pussy clenched around his cock making him cross the finish line too, you could feel thick spurts of come pairing your walls.

Aaron pulled out mesmerised by the mixture of your cums together. Two of his fingers collected the dripping come and pushing it back inside, groaning loudly. The overstimulation make you whinge.

After Aaron had cleaned you up and made you go to the bathroom (reid had told him about the dangers of utis after sex), you found yourselves cuddled in eachothers arms.

Your soft breathing acting like a sleeping pill for Aaron, and he was sure this was the best nights sleep he’s had in a while.

It became a problem that he tasted you because now he would never let you go.

OH MY GOD GUYS!! this was so hard to write😭 i love reading smut but writing it, not so much!! i gross myself out💔 HOPE YOU LOVED THIS PART please lmk down in the comments I LOVE YOU ALL SO SO MUCHHH💞💞 xoxo

@mrs-ssa-hotch

[callsign-mimic]

A Part of the Pack

Chapter 5

Content Warnings: Mentions of violence, reality adjacent Mimic, cavity inducing fluff

Price and Gaz had to practically drag Saint out of the med bay once Mimic had been admitted. Despite her having been completely lucid and seemingly unbothered. It was only because Mimic herself had firmly requested that Saint adhere to protocol that they allowed themself to be led back to the den.

Alphas weren’t supposed to be anywhere near an injured Omega. And that normally wouldn’t have been an issue for Saint. If they hadn’t watched Mimic get stabbed right before their eyes. The fact that Saint still reeked of blood that wasn’t there, in spite of the copious amounts of neutralizer that they’d been doused in, hadn’t really helped put the medics at ease with their initial refusal to leave.

It helped that Ghost had promised to stay by her side. Hell, it even helped that Nikolai had offered to stick around until she was cleared to leave medical. Two huge Omegas that bordered on Alphas watching over the scrappy little operative was enough for Saint to begrudgingly leave.

“She’ll be fine.” Gaz promises. “She was still making jokes the whole time. One little knife won’t be enough to take out our Mim.”

“And it’s going to be a running joke for the little menace for the rest of our lives.” Price grumbles, running a hand through his hair.

“Ye know she’s gonna want ta keep th’ knife.” Soap says, a shiteating grin splitting his face.

Saint huffs, comforted by the men’s words, but far from satisfied with the situation. The faint, coppery tang of the enemy soldier’s blood was still on the back of their tongue. It had been incredibly satisfying to see the ruined remains of the man on the ground before they had rushed Mimic to exfil.

A lot of the residual stress washed down the drain with the blood, sweat, and grime of the mission as Saint showered. When they returned to the den, their Omegas had made a nest. A comfortable pile of blankets, pillows, clothes… Anything they could find with even the barest hint of Mimic’s scent on it. All to comfort their incredibly stressed Alpha.

Saint’s neutralizers didn’t stand a chance against the stress they felt as they waited for word of Mimic’s condition. It got to the point where they couldn’t really leave the den for long periods of time. For fear of overwhelming the rest of the base.

Mimic, to her credit, is a good sport about the whole ordeal. Requesting only the bare minimum for painkillers, not wanting to be too doped up to appreciate her watchful company.

Nikolai stays right by her side as promised. Though the medics don’t appreciate how he keeps making her laugh as he regales her with tales of his escapades during her three year absence.

“She’s recovering from a punctured lung.” One very annoyed medic snaps, glaring at Nikolai. “You’re going to exacerbate her injuries if you keep making her laugh like that.”

“Nonsense!” The burly Russian says with a laugh. “She is made of sterner stuff than you think. She will let me know when I am too much.” The medic rolls her eyes, huffing in annoyance before they finish checking Mimic’s vitals and flit out of the room.

Ghost acts as a messenger of sorts. Moving between Mimic’s bedside and the den to keep the rest of the team up to date on her condition. The more good news he brings back, the more Saint starts to relax.

It’s a week before Mimic is finally released from the med bay. She’s given plenty of medical restrictions, including a very pointed remark about not laughing too hard. Not that the team intended on letting her do much of anything, anyway.

Including heading back to her isolated cabin.

“Doc said you’re not in any state to be travelling overseas.” Price says, his tone just stern enough to discourage argument. He crosses his arms as he stares down at Mimic. Who was trapped on the couch in Soap’s arms with Gaz resting his head in her lap.

“Why do you want to leave so soon, anyway?” Gaz asks, massaging Mimic’s hand as it rests on his chest. “Don’t you like being here? With us?”

“I do. Genuinely.” Mimic replies. She feels Soap nuzzle against her neck, making her shift slightly. “I’m just not comfortable being around everyone else on base. It’s… It’s kind of overwhelming after three years alone.”

“Ah, солнышко, but you are not meant for isolation.” Nikolai says, wrapping an arm around Price’s waist and pulling him close.

“Ye need a pack, m’eudail.” Soap murmurs against her neck. Saint perks up at his words, catching the attention of Price, Ghost, and Nikolai.

“That’s implying that there’s a pack that wants me…” Mimic grumbles in response, then yelping when both Gaz and Soap deliver a sharp nip to her pale skin.

“You have a pack that wants you, luv.” Ghost growls, the low rumble betraying his irritation and causing Mimic to give him a sheepish look.

Saint moves over to the couch, gently disentangling Mimic from Soap and Gaz. They hold her tightly to their chest, muzzle buried in her hair. Saint inhales deeply before grumbling out a single word. Enough to make Mimic’s heart melt.

“Stay.”

[daycourtofficial]

hello I would like a latte with marshmallow and vanilla

Okay I cooked a bit with this one 😭 Rhys needed a bit of a redemption methinks

Order your own coffee for gingerfucker week here

Latte with marshmallow and vanilla = fluff with Atlas and a bat boy

“Uncle Rhys?”

The small voice pulled him from the papers on his desk, amber eyes looking up at him. His nephew, Atlas, fidgeted on the other side of the desk, a nervous habit his sister, Atlas’ mother, used to do in her youth.

“Yes?”

“Can Nyx and I go flying?”

Rhys sat back in his chair, a bit surprised at his nephew’s question. His grin spanned his whole face, something he couldn’t contain whenever the pride of seeing his son flying through the air entered his mind.

His grin quickly slackened. “You can’t fly, Atlas.” The words punctured Rhys, reminding him of teaching Atlas’ mother how to fly centuries ago.

“I can hold him up, daddy.” Nyx came barreling into the room just in time to wrap his arms around Atlas’ middle, picking the Autumn heir up about a foot off the ground. Nyx’s tanned cheeks puffed out, exhausting himself with the effort as Atlas tried to reach higher, making himself seme further off the ground.

“Nyx can’t even lift you off the ground, Atlas.” He chuckled, getting up from his desk. He rounded his desk, crouching down in front of Atlas and Nyx. “How about we all go flying?”

The cheers from the two small boys grew louder as Rhysand stood to his full height, his wings sprouted from his back, enjoying hearing Atlas’ awe at the sight of them. He crouched back down, scooping both boys up into his arms before running for the balcony. He made his last step on the balcony, his wings beating behind him as there was nowhere left for him to land.

Atlas shrieked in his ear, wiggling to firmly have a hold on Rhysand’s neck as they flew higher and higher. The air was getting colder the higher they flew, the sky a bright shade of blue

Atlas’ screams subsided, turning into ooh’s and ah’s as he and Nyx tried showing each other the various spots of Velaris.

“There’s my school!”

“Is that Uncle Az?”

“There’s mommy’s art studio!”

Their words were filled with amazement as Rhysand remained silent. Atlas’ hair was so vibrant in the sun, it was nearly blinding. His freckled cheeks stretched taut, bursting with joy only a child knows.

Atlas reached for the sky, his short arms not long enough to capture the sun in his hand. Rhys’s wings were an act of defiance, determination to not be kept pinned down. Did the little boy know he couldn’t defy gravity by himself? That no one reached the stars without help?

He spun through the air, delighting in the childish screams that accompanied being upside down. He flew them over the tops of Velaris, his grin growing as he began their descent onto one of the many rooftops downtown.

The boys groaned, the end of the flight disappointing them. Rhys kept them in his arms - they were almost getting too big to carry, a fact he did not want to mention to either his mate or his sister.

He kept a tight grip on them, his fingers desperate to cling to their childhood, keeping them young and happy for as long as he could.

“What’s a midday flight without cookies?” Their small, round faces quickly lit up as Rhys maneuvered to their rooftop access door, slipping inside to indulge in the whims of two small boys.

[magicalbats]

Kinktober 2024 Day 4: Sampo x Reader

Rating: R-18+

Word Count: 7082

Warnings: afab!reader, Silvermane Guard reader, size difference, age difference, handcuffs, cunnilingus, cumming untouched, cum in pants 🤭 dubcon, piv, mentioned stomach distention

A/N: So I'll fully admit that part of what went into this was me being petty lol ofc I was excited to write for Sampo again anyway, but I got a comment on the first fic I did for him that accused the reader of being underage. When she most certainly was not. If that was the angle I was going for, trust me, you'd know about it. So I played up the size difference big time in this one and made our reader a sweet little virgin for him to take advantage of 🤭

⭐

It’s not every day that Sampo Koski finds himself on the sharp end of a Silvermane Guard’s short sword and for that he has to give you credit. 

The fact you’d managed to track him down at all, let alone way out at the far edge of the old abandoned city is impressive enough on its own. Not many could have accomplished even that much. But to then face him by yourself rather than calling for backup? 

Well, it looked to him like you were just chomping at the bit to sink your teeth into some trouble. 

“I’ve got you cornered now, you crook. Make any sudden movements and I’ll run you through. You’re under arrest.” 

That was all well and good, but as he looks down the length of your very pointy sword he understands why it's not one of the standard issue halberds you’ve got pointed at his face. You were tiny in comparison to him and hardly the sort of girl he’d call intimidating. He could probably take you, sword or no sword. In fact he’s sure he can, considering he must’ve had at least a hundred pounds on you easy, and yet … the clear glint of challenge in your eyes makes him reconsider that choice. Although he’d come out on top eventually that didn’t mean he wouldn’t suffer a few puncture wounds for it along the way and he isn’t quite convinced he can afford that price. Getting into a tussle with you probably wasn’t worth it. 

Feigning defeat, he lets out a heavy, long suffering sigh and slowly lets go of the bag full of smoke bombs sitting on top of the rickety old table. Just as any good con man knows when to quit while he’s ahead, Sampo recognized that now was the right time to throw in the towel. He could always figure something out further down the road, after you’d put your little sword safely away.

And besides. You did strike him as someone who might be fun to play with for a while. 

So he harmlessly lifts his hands up in what should have been the universal gesture of surrender but you jolt as if he’d just reached for a loaded gun. The blade aggressively bobs with the involuntary flex of muscle and nearly takes off the end of his nose, surprising an undignified squawk out of him. A bit on edge, yeesh. 

“Alright, alright. Let’s just calm down and take a few deep breaths, okay? You could really hurt someone waving that thing around like that!” 

“Be quiet!” You hiss up at him. 

Keeping your weapon leveled at the center of his face, you take a step forward as if to close the distance but he’s quick to scuttle back a pace. It’s not like he really had much of a choice, your eyes flashing dangerously as you follow after him. 

“Do not even think about trying to escape, you damned nuisance. In the name of the Amber Lord and under order of the Supreme Guardian, I’m taking you into custody.” 

“Sure thing, missy. I hear ya’ loud and clear!” He says, trying to laugh it off even as he dances back on his toes to keep at a safe distance. If he just maintained his cool long enough you’d eventually let your guard down. Probably. “But you’re not going to have anyone to arrest if you poke me full of holes! Say, here’s an idea. How about you put that oversized butter knife away and then we’ll talk this out, hm?” 

“As if I have anything to say to the likes of you.” 

“Oooh, come on. Don’t be like that.” His hapless chuckling abruptly cuts off with a not entirely feigned gulp when he backs all the way up into the wall. With nowhere else to go, Sampo can only tip his head back with a dull thump against the aged and decaying wood when you bring the end of your sword so close that he almost goes cross eyed trying to track its movement.  

Sure, he’d admit you were good and evidently not the sort of person who would make the mistake of underestimating a much bigger opponent just because you had him at sword point but that didn’t mean you wouldn’t slip up eventually. He just needed to bide his time, pick his cards right and do what he always does best. 

Playing the fool. 

“Okay, look! I’m ever so sorry for whatever crime you think I may have committed to make you come after me like this,” He croons in his most convincing, well practiced tone of solicitation. “But I’m sure this is all just one big misunderstanding. If you’d just give me a chance to explain myself I think we’ll get this sorted out in no time and then we can both be on our merry ways. Come on! That only sounds fair, doesn’t it?” 

Eyes narrowing up at him, you haughtily lift your chin as if in outright defiance of his entreatment. “You are not entitled to fairness after all the scams and cons you’ve pulled on other people, you blue demon. I’m afraid I have no pity to spare for you this time.” 

“I can see that.” Sorely grumbling under his breath, Sampo drops his attention down and to the side to fix on a seemingly random spot on the floor. He can see you shifting slightly at his peripheral, restless and maybe just a little nervous now that you were face to face with the supposed scourge of Belobog. Although it was obvious you were well trained you were still just a bit too naive and trusting if you were really going to fall for that old trick. 

“As long as you cooperate and don’t make this any harder than it needs to be,” You intone, indeed reading his body language as that of defeat. “Things will be much easier for you in the long run. I’ve got you cornered with nowhere to go. Just give up and come peacefully.” 

Slowly taking one of your hands off the hilt, you reach back with a careful motion for something in your supplies pack. He has a few guesses what it might be, of course, but you don’t quite make it that far. Sampo spots his chance when the backward stretch of your arm pulls your gravity off center just so to make you redistribute your weight more on the left leg than the right. It’s slight enough to be almost imperceptible to the average man but average man Sampo Koski is not. 

His arm snaps up to grab at your outstretched wrist like a striking serpent, your eyes going big and round when he redirects your sword away from him with a smoothly controlled jerk. Your reaction time is quick though and you start to bring your other hand back around to restore your grip. The following rush of motion happens so fast that most of it is just adrenaline fueled muscle memory on his part. 

Blindly reaching for you with his opposite hand, Sampo pushes off from the wall so he can use his greater size to spin you, effectively trading places. He shoves you back with a bit more force than he’d intended to and the resulting thump makes the old rafters rattle in protest. The impact seems to force all the air from your lungs, momentarily stunning you, and he takes quick advantage of that opportunity to snag your other wrist so he can slam it back against the groaning wall. At the same time, he presses into you with his weight to fully pin you there and stop you from struggling, effectively trapping you in place. 

It’s over in an instant. 

Letting out a faintly shuddering breath, Sampo tips his chin down to look at your face. Glaring right back at him, you visibly gnash your teeth and try to push back on his hold with your sword hand but it’s no use. Not only is he bigger and stronger than you, but he’s heavier too. Just as he’d expected then. You were a bit too undersized to take him on. 

“Guess you should have called for backup, eh?” He teases you, letting his mouth curl into a sleazy grin that just seems to further grate on your nerves, given the way you make a wild attempt to thrash yourself free. 

In truth he finds it rather cute for all of five seconds until your desperate twisting brings one of your knees up a little too close to his crotch. His smile drops immediately, and he quickly wedges his thigh into the space between your legs to further limit your range of movement. Couldn’t have you incapacitating him that easily, now could he? 

And the sharp gasp you pull in at the nudge delights him to no end, especially when you go stockstill between him and the wall. The startled look on your face is priceless and he can’t quite stop himself from cooing at you as he dips his head down to get a better view. Such a pretty thing for a Silvermane. It seemed a real shame that you were wasting all your time and energy putting yourself in danger for nothing more than a few cheap medals of honor. Perhaps he could change that though. 

“Now, now. There’s no need for all this nonsense, is there? If you’d wanted a piece of ol’ Sampo Koski so bad, all you needed to do was ask. I’m not so cruel and cold hearted to deny a cute little thing like you.” 

Even through two layers of clothes, both his and yours, he can feel the vague sensation of your pussy squeezing against his thigh. It makes his cock twitch in fast growing interest as he wonders what your cunt must look like, what it tastes like. And although it’s hard to tell through the uniform, he suspected your tits were big and juicy too, given the way they heavily shift under your clothes when you give a weak jerk against his hold. Oh, but he couldn’t wait to help himself to you. 

First though … “Why don’t you go ahead and drop that sword for me, sweetheart? Hm? Be a dear, won’t you?” 

“Bastard - -!” 

Obviously you weren’t going to willingly give up the fight anytime soon, so he makes careful work of readjusting his hold on your wrist. Sampo’s hand greatly dwarves yours just as the rest of him does and it’s easy for him to twist it at just the right angle to make your fingers go lax. With a wordless cry from you, the blade noisily clatters to the ground which he quickly uses his other foot to kick away. Reluctantly going still, you shoot him a wary, guarded look that brings the smile back to his face. 

“There. That’s much better, isn’t it? Now if you’ll just relax a little bit we can - -“

His grip on you barely eases up for a second and you’re yanking your hand free with a violent lurch to smack him right across the face. The hit itself does more to surprise him than any pain that might come with it, and his head jerks to the side with a dramatic ‘oof!’  

So impressed by your gumption, he doesn’t immediately react so you have enough time to twist in his hold and slam your boot into the back of his knee. He crumples just like that, hitting the ground at your feet, but you’re quick to follow him down. 

Throwing yourself across his back, you frantically grab at his arms to yank on them and he’s so bemused by the whole thing that he just lets it happen. It takes a great deal of effort on his part not to outright laugh when he was getting such a kick out of this, instead playing along with a series of lilting grunts and ‘ow, ow, ow’s that he hopes are sufficiently convincing. What an interesting woman who would choose to wrestle with a man double her size after she’d already been unarmed. He couldn’t wait to see what you’d do next. 

Panting heavily, you at last manage to get his arms wrenched behind him and you dig your knee into his spine to force Sampo all the way down on the dirty floor. He can hear you fumbling with your pack as much as he feels it when you’re sitting on top of him, but this he just lets happen as well. 

And with a sudden, triumphant exclamation of victory, you viciously snap a set of handcuffs around his wrists to secure them in place. 

As you start to ease off him with a shuddering sigh of relief, he gives his fingers an experimental wriggle to flex his arms and test the give. Nice and tight. Ah well. It wasn’t the first or last time he was going to find himself in this predicament. 

“There. I’ve got you now.” You wheeze, gingerly climbing to your feet to stand over him. Moving forward, you reach down to fist your hands in his shirt and roughly yank him up. He almost decides to give you a hard time about it but you’re doing such a good job that he doesn’t quite have the heart to make this any harder for you, so he helpfully gets one of his long legs under him so he can push himself to sit upright on the floor. 

Craning his neck back, Sampo looks up at you with a sly Cheshire Cat grin although it evidently is not the kind of expression you’d been hoping for after all that. With a bothered hiss between your teeth, you bend down to shove at his broad shoulders and force him back against the wall before straightening again. 

You’re still trying to catch your breath when you take a step back to survey your handiwork. Taking advantage of his first opportunity to do so, he appreciatively drags his attention over your vibrating body to take note of everything and commit it all to memory. The Silvermane uniforms were not designed for women, hence why so many altered theirs to better suit their needs and mobility, but you’d left yours almost completely unchanged. It was hard to get a good idea of the figure you were hiding underneath all the layers, but he was confident it would be good. His intuition rarely ever steered him wrong on such matters. 

“So,” He says at last, keeping his tone friendly and conversational. “You’ve caught me. Congratulations. What are you going to do now?” 

Shooting him a wary look, you bring a gloved hand up to wipe a bead of sweat off your cheek where it had started to run down. “What do you mean? I’m taking you back to Belobog and throwing you in jail where you belong. I’d think that should be obvious by now.” 

“Eh, sure. You could do that, and I’ll even admit it would be the logical thing to do. But don’t you think there’s something else you could do instead? A far more fun and exciting secret option that I can see you haven’t thought of yet.” 

Brows knitting in genuine confusion, you look down at him like he’s just sprouted a second head. “Have you gone mad? I have no idea what you’re trying to say, you big oaf.” 

Allowing his grin to take on a sharper, more pointed edge, Sampo gives his shoulders a meaningful shrug as he tips his head to one side. “Ooh, are you really that naive or are you just pretending not to know what kind of position I’m in right now? Well, I’ll tell you something, little miss Silvermane Guard. You can’t fool me. I know good and well how you reacted when I had you pinned you up against the wall a moment ago and now I’m completely at your mercy. So why don’t you just help yourself? I won’t even put up a fight, promise.” 

He throws you a saucy wink, and you immediately choke on a sharp intake of air as you reel back. Honestly he’d think it a bit dramatic if it weren’t for the way your expression darkens with unmistakable fluster and embarrassment, clueing him in that you weren’t simply playing up the innocent maiden schtick to keep your pride. 

And his brows take a very expeditious trip up to his hairline with that realization. “Don’t tell me … you really hadn’t thought about it? Oh me, oh my, could it be you’re actually a virgin standing before me in the flesh? You poor thing.” 

“O - of course not, you fiend! How dare you speak to me like this!” 

“But if that’s true then … surely you must not have any problem making a wager with me, hm? I mean, if you’re so experienced and knowledgeable in the ways of the adult world there’s no way I’d win, right?” 

His smirk grows when your eyes widen to the approximate size of dinner plates, just staring down at him like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming vehicle. Oh, but this was too rich. You’re doing a horrible job of pretending like you were at all comfortable with the direction this has gone and he can see his window to strike gradually revealing itself. You would have been easy enough to sucker in just about any other situation, especially for someone of his caliber, but like this? When he already had you so rattled and disoriented? This was going to be like taking candy from a baby. 

“I can see I have your attention.” He goes on, speaking in a slow, confident drawl now. “How about it then? I’ll even give you the advantage by promising to only use my mouth. No hands or — other extremities, just to keep it fair.” 

You look like you just might faint dead away as you surreptitiously glance down at his lap before snapping your attention back up with a wordless cry. “W - what are you even talking about? Why do you think I’m going to strike a deal with a criminal like you, Sampo Koski?” 

“Ah, so you do remember my name.” He graciously inclines his chin, every bit the performer at home on his stage even for an audience of one. “And I know you’re going to strike a deal with me because I can tell just how hot and bothered you’re getting from over here. You haven’t been able to stop thinking about your pussy since I pinned you to the wall, have you? Yeah, thought so. Alright. Here’s the deal, sweetheart. Give me five minutes, that’s all I ask. Just give me a chance to rock your world and if I can't make you scream for me in that time you win. I’ll go along peacefully with you back to Belobog. You won’t even hear another peep out of me the whole way, scouts honor.” 

“Wha … and if you win?” 

“Then you’ll take these handcuffs off and let me use my hands for a little while.” 

Squeaking shyly at the salacious waggle of his brows, you quickly turn away from him to look elsewhere. He watches you fidget and squirm for a drawn out moment, clearly wracked by indecision while he patiently waits to find out what you’ll choose. It was a bit of a gamble, sure, but he was no stranger to low odds bets and he was relatively confident you’d take the bait. After all, carting him all the way back to Belobog by yourself would be no easy task. 

And just as he’d expected, the promise of having a willing captive eventually wins out against your common sense and you slowly turn back around towards him. Your eyes stay downcast, preferring to look at the floor rather than at him, but that doesn’t particularly bother him much. 

Especially not when you bring your hands forward to hover at about waist level, uncertainty and nerves making you hesitate. 

“Should I just …” 

Breathing out a terse sigh through his nose, Sampo bumps his head back to rest against the wall with a knowing smirk. “That’s right. Slide your pants down and come here.” 

You look like you’re going to back out after all for the stretch of a single heartbeat but then you seem to hastily gather your resolve, mouth settling into a firm line when you reach down to fumble with the front of your slacks. The pristine white fabric slouches around your hips as soon as you get them unfastened but you stubbornly keep them held up while you shuffle forward to stand before him. 

Still smiling, Sampo inquisitively cocks his head to one side and you glare at him as if in warning before at last shoving your pants down to pool around the boots they’re tucked into. Your panties quickly follow suit to leave you bare from the waist down and nervously fussing with the bottom hem of your uniform jacket which you tug at to cover yourself. It’s plainly obvious that you’re a mess of nerves, not at all comfortable with being even partially naked in front of another like you’d wanted him to believe, but that was all right. He’d fix that soon enough. 

“Closer.” He murmurs, coaxing you with a grin. “I can’t reach you like this. No hands, remember?” 

You suck in a rough breath and hold it in your chest for a harrowing moment. 

Abruptly squeezing your eyes shut, you yank the front of your jacket up and shuffle into the space between his bent knees to offer your cunt to him. And Sampo immediately feels his mouth start to water when he gets his first good look at you just a hair's breadth from his face. 

The curls framing your pussy look soft and ticklish, a perfect place to lose himself in, and your inner thighs are soft with a welcoming pudge that begs to be squeezed. He’d have to save that for later though, and he gives his lips a quick swipe with his tongue before leaning up to dip his mouth close. 

“Such a pretty girl,” He says, low and husky, to make sure you can feel his breath wafting against your skin before he actually touches you. “I don’t understand how you’ve possibly gone this long without having anyone eat you out but it’s okay. I’m here to remedy that for you. Just relax for me, alright?” 

At your flustered little whimper, assuring him you were doing everything but relaxing, Sampo places a lingering kiss to the curls that pad your cunt. He takes his time with it as he slowly works his way down to the apex of your mound where the fleshy seam starts and he gets his first taste of you with a quick flick of his tongue. You jolt as if he’d just electrocuted you via static shock, swaying on your feet. But you stay right where you are, which he had to give you props for, merely squeezing your thighs as if to shut him out. 

Tipping his head at an angle, he presses up into the tight, hot space to startle a mouse squeak out of you. The insistent nudge of his mouth forces you to adjust your footing for balance and you reluctantly shuffle into a wider stance as he buries his face in you. His olfactory senses are immediately overwhelmed with the smell of your cunt, your taste where it settles on the back of his tongue. Slightly bitter and salty, and yet so incredibly flavored with sweet notes of arousal that he was sure to remember it for as long as he might live. 

His cock eagerly flexes in his pants to push up at the zipper as if trying to escape on its own accord while he continues to nuzzle into you, kissing and licking at fleshy lips to part them. Each lap of his tongue brings a fresh taste of you with it and he quickly realizes just how wet you really are as he worms his way into the slick crease of your body. It was clear he excited you way more than you were willing to let on and that pleases him a great deal. No wonder he’d been able to feel your pussy clenching on his thigh if this was how sensitive you were. 

“Oohh, that’s - -!” You cut off with a flustered gasp when his tongue at last nudges your clit, a barely there, featherlight caress, but still more than enough to make you judder for him. How cute. He wasn’t even going to need five minutes at this rate. 

Grinning into your cunt, Sampo undulates his wet tongue up to massage over that tender little button just gently enough to let you acclimate to the sensation. The last thing he wanted was to scare you off by going in too hard too fast but, to his continued delight, you warm up to it quickly enough. He can feel the shift in your body language when you start to relax into it, shyly jutting your hips out to better offer your pussy to his mouth. And you just keep getting stickier and stickier for him, saliva mixing with slippery arousal to leave your slit a mess with the viscous gossamar. 

He can barely contain his own excitement when he at last starts to lick you in earnest, flicking his tongue up to swipe through fleshy creases and folds, bumping against your swollen clit head on. You beautifully jerk in response, hands fisting the bottom of your jacket into a wrinkled mess until you at last give in to the urge to reach for him. 

Your fingers feel heavenly in his hair as you grab onto his head, even when they fiercely shake because of what he’s doing to you. Whining low in your throat, you again start to fidget and twist your pelvis as if to escape the onslaught of his attention and yet … you don’t actually move to pull away nor do you shove at him. You just stand there and take it while Sampo batters your poor little clit back and forth before finally sealing his lips around you to suckle. 

That seems to make your knees almost give out, and you mewl a sensitive sound into the otherwise still and silent building when you weakly rock against him, clutching his hair so tight he thinks you might actually pull it out. Oh well, though. It would be well worth it once he won this little wager and got to put his hands on you. 

“Oh! Nnghnn … gods, that’s …”

He suddenly pulls his head back with a loud, wet, obnoxious smack of his lips. 

Chuckling softly under his breath at your frazzled whine, Sampo tips his head back to look up at you again. “Amazing? Wonderful? The best gosh darn feeling you’ve ever experienced? Well, little miss Silvermane Guard, are you still feeling so confident now?” 

You shoot him a deeply embarrassed look accompanied with a soft, helpless whimper that rushes straight to his cock. It was clear enough that you didn’t know how to fully process any of this and you weren’t confident enough to take the lead either, to use him for your own pleasure like he so wished you would, but that was alright. He was keen to teach you a thing or two before this bet was finished. 

“Do me a favor,” He husks, spreading his legs wider out across the floor to lessen some of the uncomfortable strain in his pants. “Turn around and back up on me. Hey, don’t look at me like that! It’s not so strange a request, is it? It’ll still feel good, I promise.” 

“B - but that’s - -“ 

“A great idea, of course!” He cuts you off with a playful wink. “Just trust me. You won’t regret it.” 

War wages across your face for a drawn out moment while you try to parse through this no doubt confusing situation. It’s a difficult thing to do though when your pussy was coated in slick and sticky saliva, begging for more attention that he wasn’t going to give you until you either complied or made him. 

He would have been perfectly happy with the latter, truth be told, but ultimately the former wins out. You were just needy enough not to let common sense cloud your judgment and you stiffly disengage from him so you can shuffle back half a step. 

Hands reaching down to hike up the back of your jacket as you spin around, showing off your (frankly amazing) ass, you nervously glance over your shoulder at him for further instruction. “Like this?” 

“Yeah, that’s right. Now back up, and don’t be shy about it. Pretend like you’re going to sit on my face, mmkay’?” 

You give him an exceedingly strange look before clearly deciding it wasn’t worth it to question him any further. He could see the flustered resignation in your expression even from where he was sitting, and he draws an anticipatory breath to brace himself when you finally start to nudge back on him. 

If he’d had the use of his hands he would have been happy to yank you down and hold you in place no matter how much you squirmed and whined about it, but. Well. We can’t have everything we want in life, now can we? 

Instead he has to make do with watching you slowly inch back towards him, stiff and halting even as his cock restlessly flexes inside his slacks. Unable to take the waiting any longer when you still hesitate at the last moment, he leans forward to meet you halfway and he shoves his face tight into the cradle between your legs, eliciting a startled squeak of surprise from you. 

But then he opens his mouth wide, dragging his tongue from the starting dimple of your slit all the way up to your entrance where he teases you with the suggestion of penetrating you with it, and you seem to completely forget your initial reticence all at once.

Choking on a half formed moan, you blindly push back on him as you arch your back to better settle your cunt against his mouth and receive his attention. The force of it shoves his head back against the wall with a dull thud, making him groan a heavy sound into you, but it’s not near enough to deter him. Neither is the way you effectively cut off his air supply like this, making it almost impossible for him to breathe save whatever little bit he can pull in from his mouth. If anything it just fuels his own excitement to even greater heights as he hungrily laps at you now, swirling his tongue round and round your clit to leave you uncontrollably twitching against him. 

And as the seconds continue to tick by in this fashion you become increasingly more fidgety and antsy until you’re all but writhing on his face with stiff, unpracticed swivels of your hips. It smears your cunt across his nose and mouth in the process, the rush that comes with it shooting straight down to his throbbing cock where it pitifully strains against the zipper, in need of a good tug or two. It probably wouldn’t have taken a whole lot to have him shooting hot ropes everywhere and he once again finds himself sorely wishing he had his hands. 

But his inability to touch himself just seems to make it ache all the worse while, conversely, you appear to be enjoying yourself quite a bit despite the dire tinge in your stretched thin voice. Sampo can tell you don’t know what to do, how to make any sense of what’s happening to your body, and it just spurs him on to attack your defenseless clit with even greater ferocity. 

Burn everything, he couldn’t even recall the last time he’d been this hard. 

And then you say it. 

A breathless, tiny little, “M - Mister Sampo!”

That’s all it takes to make him cum, his hips stiffly rolling against the floor while he creams all over the inside of his underwear. He can hardly breathe through it, grunting a masculine sound into your cunt while the sensation of his fast cooling load bleeds into the front of his pants. In truth he’s so lost in the surge of fast pumping endorphins and potent adrenaline that it takes him a prolonged beat to realize that you’re cumming too. 

Crying out in pleasure, you shake and judder through your release far longer than he does, sucking in one frantic breath after another while you sensitively squeal his name for the whole building to hear. If this had been anywhere other than the old city the two of you probably would have had a couple of good Samaritan’s running to check what was going on to make a woman cry out like that and he’d quickly find himself on the sharp end of another Silvermane weapon. 

But luckily you are in the old city, not Belobog, and he slouches back against the wall with a heaving groan when you finally pry yourself away from him, still twitching with the lingering remnants of your orgasm. He only needs to take one look at you, legs trembling like a newborn foal while you try to orient yourself, and he knows what he needs to do. 

Recovering much quicker than you do, Sampo leans forward even when it just makes his underwear give a wet squish at the change in position and flexes his arms to test the full range of motion allotted to him by the cuffs. They don’t even budge but that wasn’t a problem. He has enough room to flick his hand up and out, summoning a small blade of wind to slice clean through the metal chain connecting the two links with a barely audible rattle. 

He quickly brings his hands around and reaches for you, grabbing onto your hips before you can react or even realize what’s happening. Completely ignoring your squawk of surprise, he yanks you down into his lap to sit on his still achingly rigid cock and he curls himself over you, chuckling softly at the way you gape up at him in barefaced shock. 

“W - w - wha —“ 

“Oh, did I forget to tell you? You’ll need something a bit stronger than that if you want to keep me locked up. Surprised?” 

Keeping one arm secured around your middle, he reaches down with the other to splay his fingers across your rapidly flexing stomach and then drags it lower to dip between your legs. You gasp and twist in his hold, uselessly smacking at whatever part of him you can manage to reach, but it’s all an effort in futility. He already had you trapped in his clutches despite all the squirming, and his gloved finger takes a casual swipe through the creases of your messy cunt to make you jolt. 

“Well, well, would you look at that. I’d say I won our little bet, wouldn’t you? That means I get to put my hands all over you and … other things too, isn’t that right?” 

“Wait! You can’t - - nnghn!” 

Tossing your head back when he finds your sopping wet entrance and pushes one finger inside to feel the stretch, you seethe up at the ceiling. He’s acutely aware of your body trying to reject it and keep him out, but you were much too slippery to stop him even when your thighs valiantly squeeze shut around his hand. 

“That’s a tight fit.” He murmurs, perfectly offhand while he makes casual work of slowly thrusting his digit in and out of you. Your pussy softly clicks with the motion, so wet for him that the smooth material of his glove slides easily through your constricting passage. The only response he gets is a sharp, overwrought hiss while you halfheartedly try to shove at his arm. 

It was likely too soon after your orgasm when the nerves were still vibrating and tender, so he decides to take pity on you at least for the moment. Carefully withdrawing his hand from between your legs, he instead reaches up to yank at all the buttons and latches on your jacket to get that undone too. He couldn’t wait to see those tits for himself, and not even all your fitful writhing was enough to deter him from it. 

You harp at him the whole time of course but Sampo just coos at you to relax while he fumbles to get the inner thermal shirt yanked up around your neck. With his chin tucked over your shoulder he has the perfect vantage point to look down at the soft white bra that holds your breasts in place and he takes a moment to indulgently squeeze at them through the material, kneading the flesh until you finally relent with a harried moan. 

Only then does he hook his finger into the band and tug it down. Realizing what he’s doing, you make a desperate attempt to swat his hand away but the moment your tits spill out into the air you violently shudder so hard it seems to temporarily immobilize you. Punchdrunk and dazed, you reluctantly allow your head to loll back against his shoulder as he sets his sights on the stiff, pebbled peaks of your nipples. 

“What do you know, Sampo Koski’s intuition is always right it seems.” He murmurs, quite pleased with himself as he tweaks one of the buds to leave you moaning in his lap. “I had a feeling these were going to be nice and juicy. Are you sure no one’s ever played with these before? You look like you’re enjoying this …” 

You give a weak, faltering little mewl in response, tense fingers digging into his forearm where you’re clutching onto him for dear life. Chuckling a husky sound into your neck, he nuzzles against you to kiss and nip at the vulnerable skin there before slowly working his way up. Still idly toying with your nipples, pinching and pulling at them, he brushes his mouth across your cheek to finally claim those kissable lips for himself. 

And you let him do it, groaning hotly into his mouth while he kisses you deeply and lays total claim on your person. There isn’t an inch of you that he won’t have touched by the time he was done, and the knowledge that he was undeniably going to be your first fills him with a sick sense of pride. The signs were all there, even if he did tease you contrarily. And oh, how he was going to wreck you for any other man. It would always be him who you thought of, comparing everyone else to the so-called crook who so expertly turned your own body against you on the floor of an abandoned building in the old city, and wasn’t that just the greatest punchline of all? 

“Are you gonna’ be good for me?” He says at last when he carefully reaches under you to unfasten his pants, lips brushing yours as he speaks. “Gonna’ let this dirty old man have his way with you, right here, right now? Just like this? Hm?” 

Lost in the stupor of your arousal, you blithely nod for him even as a brief flash of uncertainty crosses your face. It seemed that some part of you understood his intention, the full brunt of the implication of what he was about to do to you, but you were too far gone to stop it and it was already much too late. Sampo has his cock fished out and he pauses only long enough to give it a perfunctory tug, smearing his own spend over the length of it to help lubricate the way. 

Angling it up, he blindly nudges through your soaked cunt until he feels the dip of your entrance, so wet and creamy against his tender glans it makes him suck in a slow breath. You go ramrod stiff in his hold, lurching forward as much as you can with his forearm still locked around your middle while your hands frantically ball into his jacket sleeves. There was no escaping it though, not in the wholly defenseless position he’s got you in, and you wordlessly cry out when he starts to push up. 

A rattling breath puffs out of him as your pussy slowly spreads open around him, granting him entry to your body. The overwhelming heat of you accompanied by the too tight squeeze makes him glad for his first orgasm, premature though it may have been, because he isn’t so sure he could have held it back otherwise. Your guts are alive around him as he gradually sinks deeper and deeper into you, aided by the help of gravity. Vulnerably curled up on his lap like this, the only thing you can do is take it. 

And you do take him, beautifully in fact. Every inch of his cock gradually slides into the tight embrace of your inner sleeve until he at last settles against the end of you with nowhere else to go. You wail a pitiful sound at the pressure that pushes in on your organs and choke on a tiny little sob as your trapped legs futilely kick at the air. It wouldn’t have helped much even if your pants weren’t tangled around them though, not when Sampo already had you fully impaled on him. 

That'd been the deal, right? 

Well, maybe it hadn’t been stated out right but that should teach you not to make deals with shady businessmen or Fool’s. 

Rumbling a low sound of pleasure as he slides his hand around, caressing over the faint bulge created by his cock through your lower stomach, Sampo nuzzles at your face again to get your attention. He wanted to make sure you weren’t drifting off to la-la land on him, and when you tip your head to blearily glance up at him with a deep felt shudder, he allows himself a sly smile. 

“Let me hear you scream my name again, pretty girl.” He purrs, narrow hips bracing to angle out of you so he can slam back in. “And don’t forget the ‘mister’ either. I think I rather liked how that sounded.”

⭐

Crossposted: here

[spdrvyn]

parched P2 — MIGUEL O'HARA

(( here's the part 2 that i mentioned in the last one !! this isn't explicit, however it is steamy, legally i shouldn't be writing explicit stuff anyway so sorry to the horny horny miguel fans out there. spoiler-free as usual ))

READ PART 1 HERE.

Whatever Miguel couldn't say in words, he'd express in actions.

He's always been like that, when you first met him, when you first started falling in love with him, when you first started dating him. Right now, it was when he was on top of you. Whispering sweet nothings into your ear, kissing every inch of you.

You were well aware of the fact that he's lacked such a gentle, loving touch for most if not all of his life. After all, he didn't seem like the biggest sap when you two were only knew each other as acquaintances.

He kept to himself most of the time when he was with you, he didn't normally engage in it unless you initiated it first. A hand at his bicep, his shoulder, his cheek.

Oh, how badly he wanted to hide that he needed it. Needed you.

Slowly but surely, he started feeling comfortable laying more than a single finger on you. Whenever he walked you home, a hand at the small of your back. Wiping stray bits of food on your mouth whenever you ate lunch together. The little things, it drove you crazy.

Your chest swelled with pride at the thoght of how far he's come, letting his guard down around you.

Not forgetting that ever since he finished 'getting fixed up', he was all over you. Smothering you with kisses, letting you sink further and further into the sheets and pillows.

"Missed this, missed you so much, amor." He uttered, his hand tangled in your hair. Tugging on it occasionally to pull you closer and closer to him, as if you weren't already. "Don't even want to think about what it was like out there. Dios, se sentía como el infierno."

At this point, you had a hard time telling if something really bad happened at work or if this is just him being needy. However, you didn't want to pry. It was clear that he was enjoying himself.

Really enjoying himself from how, once again, you felt something sharp sink into the crook between your shoulder and neck. Wincing, you whine at him. He revels in it.

"Not even one hour has passed of coming home to me and you're already trying to leave a mark." You pout, as to which he responds with a wolfish grin. "Sorry, sorry. Just can't help it sometimes. You're delectable."

Fangs really weren't something that you thought that you'd be into. Not like you've really encountered anyone with fangs in your life, Miguel was the first one. The first time you cracked a joke with him, he laughed. You got a glimpse of the canines that peeked through his gums, yet it didn't terrify you. As shameful as he used to be of them when he revealed his occupation to you.

Now, it felt like he used them daily, on you to be more specific. Like you were a staple and he was a stapler remover, which was silly but an accurate description of what it was like.

As he normally does, he decides to rub it in.

"But at the same time, don't act like you don't enjoy them. I can basically see the look on your face whenever I leave one. On your neck."

He punctured the skin, a little to draw blood. Which made you gasp, moving to scold him until he holds your arm down. Cutting you off.

"Your shoulder."

He moves down, kissing you as he does so. Before he bites down again, a little harder. Rougher this time.

"Your thighs."

The thumping of your heart is drumming in your ears as he hooks your thighs over his shoulders, massaging the soft flesh with his fingers before leaving two very prominent bite marks on them now.

He licks the blood clean off of his lips, coming back up to you with a smirk. His thumb caresses your chin as you stare at him. "Ah, that face. That's the one I'm talking about, mi vida."

You still have no idea what he's saying, before you could even delve deeper into it. He captures your lips with a soft chuckle.

Guess you'll never know.

[wri0thesley]

home - hawks x reader (6.7k)

you miss him when he's not here.

cw: not sfw. reader is afab but no gendered language is used. chubby reader, insecurities mentioned. established relationship. possessive hawks. blood, injury (mild). cunnilingus, scratching, biting, multiple orgasms.

this was a commissioned work.

There are drawbacks to being a Pro Hero’s partner.

Oh, there are some positives, too - the nice things that you get sent, sometimes, in the hopes that you’ll post them on social media and the business in question will get some extra footfall from being papped on the significant other of the more popular Pro Heroes (putting aside the occasional frustration of paparazzi always tailing you, the free clothes and free tech and free gear and free meals are very nice). The fact that Keigo has a sizable fortune that he mainly uses to make sure that you and he have the best life he can provide. The swell of pride that rises in your chest when you think about him, and all of the lives he has saved, all of the people who are grateful for him. 

The sunshine in Keigo’s face, too, when a small child tells him how much they look up to him - how they want to be just like him. The money that is funneled back by Keigo into charitable institutions for children. The fact that you’re doing a small part of good in the world despite your reasonably useless quirk (making flowers bloom at a touch is only useful when the flowers are not yet in season, after all - it’s a quirk that you can use maybe three months out of the year, and you’ve noticed flowers don’t seem to last any longer just because you’ve grazed them with your fingertips) by making Keigo happy, the way he deserves to be. 

But there are plenty of negatives. 

Those same paparazzi who sell photographs of you and Keigo to gossip magazines and comment on your appearance, your hair if it’s messy, your figure that you’re already not all that confident in. The online gossip-mongers who spend their time bemoaning how much of a better fit they’d be for a man like Keigo, if he’d just stop ‘pitying’ you enough to date you. 

The nights you spend stroking Keigo’s hair as he buries his head in your neck and all of the ugliest parts of his job fall out of his mouth; the fear of being a pawn for the HPSC for the rest of his life, the things he’s asked to do that remain secret except in whispered gasps into your ear, his hands clinging to you so tightly you think about talons puncturing your skin. The long, long nights when he’s out doing hero work and you fear that he may never come back to you. The way time stretches interminably on when he says he’ll be gone for a little while and you don’t know if it will be days or weeks or months. 

You wouldn’t trade anything for him. Keigo makes you feel seen and beautiful and loved and cherished in a way no other person could ever compare to. You get butterflies when he smiles at you. You cannot imagine a life in which you did not find each other, somehow. 

But tonight, your bed in Keigo’s penthouse (big glass windows, so he can feel like he’s flying - a huge bed, with room for his wings) is empty and cold. You wear a too-big ‘Hawks’s Baby Bird’ nightshirt that falls down to your knees, a gag gift from one of your friends who is a member of your boyfriend’s fan club. The little cartoon depiction of him is not enough to make you feel as though he is there with you.

Tonight feels like one of those nights that might last forever.

You roll over in the bed uncomfortably, legs tangling in cool sheets that you wish were warmed by your partner. The space seems to stretch on for an eternity without Keigo’s wings there for you to good-naturedly grouse about as he laughs and pulls you in even closer. 

You think not hearing anything might be the worst. 

You know what he does is important, you know that he doesn’t always tell you where he’s going because he’s worried about you - you know that being shrouded in secrecy is better for both of you. But not knowing where he is or who he’s with or what he’s doing makes all kinds of worrying scenarios play out in your head as you wonder if you’ll ever see him again, or if the last time you kissed him on the cheek and told him to be careful (and he looked at you with all of the love in the world lighting his gold eyes, his gaze saying far more than his easy laugh and his promise he would come back) would be the last time. 

Ugh. You flop onto your back and stare up at the ceiling. 

Maybe you should try making yourself a hot drink; distract yourself from the thoughts swirling around your mind and the loneliness that’s eating at your edges. That sounds nice. You swing your legs over the side of the comically oversized mattress, the soft hem of your nightshirt riding high on your thighs - and then you hear a familiar sound, and your heart feels like it swells to double its size in your chest. 

You quickly walk from the bedroom into the lounge, following the sound of beating wings and displaced air and something clinking against glass. There, on the balcony outside, stands Keigo - still in his hero costume, red wings in the process of being tucked behind him, keys tinkling in his hand. 

Through the window, he catches sight of you - and his smile is so wide it could split his face in two, eyes crinkling at the edges. He fumbles even quicker with the keys, eager to get inside and back to you - and you walk across the room, your feet warm on the cold tiled floor, to meet him.

Up close, you can see that the night has not been kind to him. 

Despite the smile that lights up his eyes and transforms his face, there are grazes all over his face; a rip in his hero costume at the sleeve, where he’s bleeding a little. His wings seem fine, but high on the left wing the feathers are bent out of shape and uneven as if he narrowly avoided trapping it somewhere. Your stomach drops somewhere in the region of your feet - and then, Keigo is through the window and it’s clinking closed behind him and you are embraced by all of him, all red feathers and fur jacket and arms wrapping so tightly around you that you can barely breathe. 

“Keigo,” your voice comes out in a choked squeak. “Keigo, you’re hurt--!”

“I’m so glad to see you,” he mumbles into the crook of your neck, his normally light tone heavy with emotion. “I missed you so so much. I . . . I thought I might not see you ever again--”

His gloved hands cling to your generous hips, squishing into the soft flesh there, dragging you against him. He noses against your neck, breathing in your scent, as if he’s trying to reassure himself that you’re real and true and there. 

“Let me look at your injuries--” You try to say, but Keigo instead pulls you into a searing kiss that makes your knees feel weak. Despite his relatively small stature - compared to most other Pros, anyway - he trains long and hard, and he pulls you into him as if you weigh nothing at all, the softness of your curves and pudge not presenting the smallest of problems. His mouth is hot and beseeching against yours; this is a kiss that says ‘I am alive, and I thought I wouldn’t be’. Fear is still rolling hot through your stomach, but it’s hard not to melt into him when he knows every spot of your mouth and every nerve of your lips as well as he knows his own. His teeth nip needily at your lower lip and you open your mouth for him - let his tongue mark you out as his, sliding across that spot behind your front teeth that makes you full-body shiver in his arms. 

It doesn’t seem to matter to him that the two of you are in full view of the windows (not that any paparazzi would be fool enough to try and photograph from here, after the last time) - all that matters is that the two of you are entwined, that Keigo is there and you are there. His hands slide down your hips to knead at the soft globes of your ass, a motion that’s meant to be teasing but instead simply feels desperate.

You break apart from him with a gasp, your heart beating frantically against your ribcage.

“Keigo,” you say, hoping you sound more sure of yourself than you feel. “I need to clean your w-wounds.”

He looks at you all half-lidded and wanting, his mouth swollen from the kiss - actually, you don’t think his gaze has strayed from you once since he first laid eyes on you. 

“I needed to kiss you,” he says to you, and he cracks a small smile that doesn’t quite mask the wildness in his eyes. “I needed to remember exactly what you were like. Remind myself you were mine, birdie.” 

“The kiss could have waited,” you say, exhaling in a way that’s part laugh and part exhaustion. “You’re hurt.”

One gloved hand raises to your face; his thumb strokes over your cheek. The smile on his face is so sad and so wanting that it makes you ache. 

“I could never wait to kiss you,” he says. “Not a second longer than I have to.”

You tug gently on his sleeve; there’s dirt all over the tan fabric. You wonder what happened to him on this mission, but you don’t ask - Keigo never wants you to have to worry about things. He keeps you as safe as he can - makes sure you can work from home, insists that if he can’t go shopping with you groceries are delivered . . . on another person, it might be suffocating. But on Keigo . . . 

He hasn’t told you much about his life pre-Wing Hero: Hawks. Still, he has told you more than almost anybody else in the whole world knows, and you understand why he clings to the vestiges of a home he’s managed to build around himself. It’s hard not to be flattered that he considers you home - and you, in return, feel exactly the same way about him. 

“Come on,” you say to him, a little more forcefully this time, and you give him a gentle smile so he doesn’t feel like he’s worrying you too much. “Let me clean these scratches and get your uniform off, and I promise you can kiss me as much as you like for as long as you like.”

He lets out a soft laugh but lets himself be tugged across the room anyway. 

“My uniform off?” He asks, lightly teasing, the edge of desperation slowly ebbing away now that he is with you and knows you are safe. “Why, birdie, you’ve only gotta ask! Little forward, but I’m not gonna complain--”

You roll your eyes at him, but laugh all the same, as the two of you enter the kitchen and you bully him lovingly into taking a seat on one of the stools by the long breakfast bar. You reach up onto your toes to reach the first-aid kit kept in one of the high kitchen cupboards, feeling the hem of your shirt rise up to reveal the thin red satin underwear you wore to bed--

“Are those Hawks brand, too?” Keigo asks. You can’t see him, but you can just imagine the shit-eating grin that’s painted itself over his face. “Look, I know you want me to stay still whilst you tend lovingly to me, but you’re making this really difficult--”

“Shh,” you tell him, turning around with the little metal tin tucked beneath your arm. “You’re just trying to get out of the antiseptic swabbing, aren’t you?”

It takes you by surprise how quickly he’s shed his garments. You suppose that speed is his greatest asset, but still - you’d heard only a little rustling, and yet Keigo is suddenly sat behind you totally shirtless with his uniform discarded on the stool beside him. You can see almost all of him; the lean muscles of his pectorals, dotted with old scars - the corded forearms, the surprisingly strong hands . . .

You’re grateful to see that the wounds and scratches are only surface-level. They’ll need cleaning and bandaging up a little, but that’s all - he’s not at risk of any infections, doesn’t need to go see any healers or hospital workers. You’re glad - you don’t want him to be out of your sight for any longer than he has to be now that you finally have him back for a while. 

You cough as you rifle through the medical kit for anti-bacterial wipes, feeling your face heat up at his proximity and his nakedness. Keigo laughs softly, angling his body closer to you.

“You’re cute when you’re nervous,” he says to you, his voice low and soft. “C’mon. See something you like?”

“Could you stop flirting for one second?” You ask him, as you wipe over one of the nasty grazes on his arm - you don’t think you could look into those golden eyes right now without falling into them like molten pools. “I need to get this cleaned up.”

“You’d be flirting if the prettiest thing in the whole world was touching your naked body,” Keigo says to you, reasonably; and he laughs again when you fumble with the bandage you’re trying to affix to the spot in question. “C’mon. You’re even wearing my merch! How’m I supposed to just sit here and let you look after me when I’m thinking about pinning you to the breakfast bar and having my wicked way with you, huh?”

“Have your wicked way with me when I’m done,” you tell him, and now you have no choice but to turn your hand to the grazes on his cheek - and looking at Keigo’s pretty face takes your breath away in the same way it always does. His eyes are liquid gold, burning you as you gently wipe the blood from his sharp cheekbones. At the touch of your fingers on his face, he takes a sharp intake of breath - and one strong hand lands on the outside of your thigh, thumb pressing softly into the skin there. Your own breath stutters in your chest. 

There’s a bloom of heat low in your core, to be looked at like that. Possession and adoration and hunger all mixed up in his gaze, your own body screaming at you that Keigo wants you and you want him and everything else should be thrown to the wayside in pursuit of the pleasure the two of you are clearly longing for. 

He breathes out after a moment that feels like it lasts a week, and his voice has dropped a semitone into something rich and low and starving hungry. 

“You’re nearly done now, right?” He asks, swallowing, the bob in his throat visible. “I’m not sure how much longer I can stop myself.”

You do not break eye contact as you drop the gauze, as you close the lid of the first-aid kit. 

“I’d think a Pro Hero would have more control,” you say to him breathily. “Stop yourself from doing what, exactly?”

He smiles up at you with a wickedness that makes you weak at the knees, and you feel all of your concern about his grazes and bruises and the feathers that have been bent and ruffled in his wings melt away in favour of the persistent pounding in your core.

He moves lightning-fast; utterly deserving of all of his accolades, and before you know it you’re pressed against the breakfast bar, your ass pressed flush against the rim of the surface, and Keigo has dropped down onto his knees. 

“Stop myself from eating you all up, birdie,” he says, with a grin bright and hungry, as he presses his nose softly against the plumpness of your thighs. “You’re looking delicious, and I’m starving after being away for so long. Won’t you let a guy have a taste?”

You gasp as he moves his face; as his nose nudges at your mound through the Hawks branded underwear. He breathes in deeply, savouring the scent of you on the air.

“I can tell you want it too,” he teases you. “I can smell you from here. That’s how I know how delicious you’re going to be.”

“Keigo,” you breathe out lightly, but there is no complaint in your tone. Your boyfriend takes this the way it is; your consent for him to do whatever he wants to you, and his smile is knife-sharp in the darkness as his fingers hook into the elastic of the underwear and slowly begin to edge them down your legs. 

“Spread for me, angel,” Keigo murmurs, dropping a kiss just above your knee, peppering the skin he can currently get to with more feather soft touches of his lips. “Show me how much you want it. Let me see you; I’ve missed you. Feels like a century when I don’t see you for a day.” 

You fall over yourself to please him. You’ve missed him just as much; too deeply for you to care if you seem desperate, when you spread your legs further and let him see the wet mess between your legs. Keigo’s eyes go half-lidded and wanting as he trails the pad of one of his fingers up your thigh to dip between the lips of your sex and into your slick. 

“Look at you, pretty birdie,” he says, low and awestruck. “This is all for me? Aren’t I the lucky one? Aren’t you just the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen?”

Your face heats up at the compliments; Keigo is never shy about giving them, of course, but when the position is so intimate and he looks so fascinated it’s hard not to feel woozy with the want that drips off every syllable. Keigo moves his face closer; kisses at the plump spill of your very inner thighs, where they’re damp with your own arousal. Teeth bite into the flesh gently, nipping at you until you gasp. 

“Y-you were being serious about eating me up, then?” You ask, a huff of laughter on your lips, as Keigo shifts his attentions to the other thigh, sucking love bites into the soft flesh. 

“Just making sure you know you’re mine,” he says, breathless. “Marking you up so you know who you belong to. After I’ve eaten you up, I’ll get on to eatin’ you out--”

He kisses over your sex this time; his breath fanning hot against your most sensitive parts. Your knees almost buckle, and you have to cling to the rim of the breakfast bar to stop yourself from just falling onto him completely. You feel a couple of well-placed breaths away from collapsing onto the floor.

“Is that a . . . a promise?” You ask him, and Keigo chuckles and the vibrations seem to travel from between your legs and right up your spine. 

“For you?” He murmurs, and his tongue darts out - laps up your cunt from perineum to clit, and you swear you see stars. “Of course it is.” 

Once Keigo has had a taste of you, there’s nothing you can do. You know it from past experience sprawled out on the bed beneath him as he works you over until you’re putty in his hands - when he wants someone, when he wants something, when something is his and it’s his responsibility . . . he will not rest until he’s wrung several orgasms out of you and you can barely move. The kitchen is a brand new development for this kind of thing, but Keigo is more than a little possessive and when you’ve murmured in the heat of the moment about christening every surface in his apartment it’s always gotten him going--

So it’s all you can do, really, to let him eat you out like he’s a man starved and he’s having his final meal before his untimely end. 

To let your fingers curl around the rim and to give yourself into Keigo’s mouth as it hotly works you over; his tongue dragging through your folds as if he’s trying to drink you in. Your own mouth falls open as your breath escapes you in little surprised gasps; it seems that for every slow lap of his tongue, he manages to do some kind of swirling trick of athletics that makes you feel like you’re melting into a pleasured mess. 

In between the licks and the sucks, he turns his attention back to the soft fullness of your thighs; drops little growling interludes of;

‘Mine’. ‘So beautiful’. ‘So good’. ‘You’re mine’. ‘Mine, mine, mine’. 

Kisses and bites and licks and mumbles, the soft abrasive scratch of his scruff making you dizzy and light-headed as you feel all of the pleasure that he brings you work itself into tight knots in your stomach. Sometimes he bites just a little too hard, as if he wants to ensure that the mark takes - and though on another partner, you might push him away, with Keigo it’s hard to not just let your lashes flutter and a soft moan escape at the thought of just how much he wants you to be his. 

There’s something to be said about having the mark of ownership of a man like Keigo upon your skin. 

He rubs his cheeks against your thighs, uncaring of how your slick is fair dripping from your sex; covering himself in your scent the same way he tries to cover you in his own. You’ve heard him complain when you switch shower gels or perfumes or shampoos; you know he can’t get enough of the natural scent of you. He never cares about cuddling up to you when you feel sweaty or gross - in fact, a couple of times, you’ve thought that it really gets him going--

It’s getting much harder to think the longer Keigo uses his mouth on you. 

It’s hard to think of anything other than the sensation of his tongue, the prickling pleasant heat that’s running through your veins, the groans of pleasure that he keeps putting forth with every new lap and suck and kiss of your clit. Your fingers twitch, your thighs shaking wildly, as you hover on the precipice of your orgasm.

“That’s right, beautiful,” he murmurs softly. “Come on. Come for me.” 

There’s no question of doing anything but. 

Your entire body goes taut all over, like a string waiting to be plucked - and then snaps, as your orgasm washes over you in fierce waves, making your body tingle like fireworks are being set off beneath your skin. You don’t try to muffle your noises - Keigo had coached that out of you with kisses and begging and telling you how much he loves hearing you - so soft whimpers and moans come issuing forth from your mouth, bouncing against the kitchen walls. Keigo makes his own noise in response; a coaxing kind of reassurance that you can let yourself go with him, you’re safe. His mouth is still pressed against your sex, though, his tongue still drinking in the slick you’re pumping out with every clench and pulse of your release. 

He stays there even as the orgasm slowly subsides and feeling returns to your extremities. You’re sensitive, your thighs shaking - and Keigo chuckles, pulling back and looking up at you with his eyes all blown with adoration. 

“I’ve missed the way you taste,” he tells you, tone teasing. “I’ve missed the way you sound, too. I’ve missed . . . all of that.”

“I’ve missed you more,” you say to him breathlessly. “A-are you going to let me repay the favour?” 

Keigo laughs again, and the sound makes happiness bloom in your chest. 

“No,” he says, sounding very sure of himself. “I’m not done with you yet, birdie. I need to make sure that every perfect inch of you remembers me; I need to make sure that you’re always with me, that you’re imprinted onto every part of me, that you know just how much I love you and I need you and that I can remember every part of you with my eyes closed--”

Your cheeks are hot at this profession of adoration. It’s not that Keigo is shy about these things - he said ‘I love you’ before you did - but . . . he’s not always prone to these big, grand gestures. He holds your hands and pulls you close and keeps you next to him, plays with your hair and remembers your favourites and checks in on you to make sure everything is alright as often as he can. Love story confessions are not his style--

And that’s how you know that he means every single syllable. 

“Th-that’s not fair,” you say weakly, as Keigo takes your hand and tugs you through the apartment instead, a mirror of you taking him into the kitchen to clean his wounds. “I want to do all that for you too--!”

“Ah, but you didn’t get to saying it before me, did you?” He shoots you a broad grin, pulling you into the bedroom. The sheets on your huge bed are still rumpled; he raises one eyebrow. “Not sleep well without me, birdie?”

“You know I never do,” you whisper, and his face goes impossibly soft. He pulls you closer to him, pressing his nose against your own so that the two of you are staring directly into one another’s eyes. 

“I love you,” he says, plain and simple. His hands go to touch your hips, to slide up to your waist and to your chest, his touch reverent like a sculptor and his masterpiece. “I love everything about you. If it were up to me, I’d spend every waking minute with you - I’d never let you leave our bed. We’d have everything we need. I . . .” He swallows. “I want to be with you forever.”

“I want to be with you forever, too,” you breathe out - you bring your hand up to stroke over his shoulders, to delicately curve over the musculature in his back to where his wings stand proudly out. He lets out a soft noise of pleasure at the soft touch of your fingers on the downy feathers at the base, his cheeks going pink. 

“Then let me take care of you,” Keigo murmurs, softly. “Let me come inside of you so many times you don’t remember what it feels like to have anything inside of you but me.” He takes a shuddering breath - and despite your earlier orgasm, your breath catches and your pulse beats between your thighs as if it’s agreeing that he can do whatever he wants with you. “Please.”

“Keigo--”

“Say I can, birdie.”

His touch gets desperate. His thumbs dig into the soft meat of your waist, the plump pudge there. You make the mistake of flickering your eyes away from his gaze, to between you and below your eye line, to see the way that his cock is tenting the front of his pants in need. You think about Keigo’s cock - about how it feels inside of you, about how perfectly it fills you up, about the sensation of having him come inside and keep going, keep pumping himself into you--

“Keigo,” you breathe, eyes flicking back up to him. “Of course you can.”

As much as you want to get on your knees for him and bring him the same pleasure he’s already brought you today, you can tell that this means a lot to Keigo - and so you’re not surprised when he groans out loud and pulls you back into a fierce kiss. Your lips are nibbled on, your tongue danced with, your entire body dragged into a kiss that Keigo puts every muscle into - until he pulls back, breathless. 

“Can we get this off you now?” He asks, tugging at your nightshirt. “Kind of weird to be looking at myself right now, even if I do look very cute as a cartoon--”

You laugh as you pull the dark red cotton over your head. You have a brief moment of doubt - that same flash that comes across you every time you fully disrobe in front of Keigo, a voice in your head saying that you’re not good enough or pretty enough for him - but it’s a doubt that Keigo quickly dispels as he pushes you back onto the bed and begins to pepper every inch of your newly exposed skin with bites and kisses. 

“I love these,” he murmurs, palming at your chest with rough calloused hands, plucking your nipples between thumb and forefinger until they stand to stiff attention. “They’re so pretty.” A pinch, and you whine, back arching. “And so sensitive--!” 

His tongue follows the path of his fingers, swirling around the nipple and sucking on it with a soft pop until you’re whining even louder, spreading your thighs apart for him in a silent plea to get on with it.

“You’re being needy,” he tells you, with a bite to the swell of your breast that you can tell will leave a bruise. “And I love it. Ask me nicely, pretty birdie--”

“Please fuck me, Keigo,” you say, breathless with need and want and the dizzying desire to have him inside of you. “Please, I want you inside of me--”

He kisses you fiercely again; fabric is displaced lower down his body as he works his trousers off without for a moment breaking the contact of your two lips. His cock slaps against the roundness of your tummy, leaving wet precome in a smear over your navel - hard and long, stiff and aching to find anchor in your port. 

“You have no idea what hearing you say that does to me,” he murmurs, his breath hot against your ear. “Spread wider, angel, alright?” 

You obey him, spreading your thighs so wide that it’s almost painful. 

The two of you have had to experiment with positions many times - Keigo’s wings provide an interesting challenge for ensuring that both of you are comfortable. Even now, in this simplest of positions, his wings make a canopy over you and give a soft red-warm glow to everything beneath them. Keigo smiles at you so softly that it feels like melting, and then his cock is nudging the lips of your sex apart and slowly slowly slowly sinking inside of you. 

It’s gratifying, to finally be full. His tongue felt good, but there’s a kind of intimacy in this that it can’t replicate - a feeling that the two of you are melding together, hearts beating as one. Keigo’s eyes flutter closed, a soft sigh escaping his pretty mouth.

“You have no idea how you feel,” he chokes out. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed you--”

“You feel like home,” you say to Keigo, and he whines and sheathes himself fully inside of you. 

His arms wrap around you, pulling you up so you’re not just laid directly on the bed. His nails - fingers a little sharp, like talons - rake down your back, scratching into you, as he gets used to feel of you hot and tight and wet around him. The two of you are both panting, your own arms wrapping around his neck so you’re as close to him as you can possibly be. 

He crashes his lips against yours at the same time as he begins to move his hips in hungry little circles. He isn’t yet fucking in and out of you in wild abandon, but this is still overwhelming after being without him for a few nights and forgetting all of the places inside of you that are stoked like a brand new fire by his cock, stretching you out. You move your hips against him in tiny increments, his abdomen rubbing against your swollen clit in a way that sends pleasant little frissons of electricity up and down your spine. 

The electric mixes with the scratches of Keigo’s hands, an overwhelming symphony of sensation that is at once too much and not enough. You lose track of time - you lose track of anything but the feel of Keigo inside of you, the pleasure of being stretched and fucked and taken and knowing you are loved. 

His lips against yours, his words against your ear with whispers of how much he loves you and how beautiful you are and how good you are for him. Your own words, coming out slurred and breathless as you both chase your orgasms, wanting to crest that hill together. 

“Keigo,” you’re whimpering. “Keigo, Keigo, Keigo.” Chants of his name spilling out of your lips like prayer beads, prayers that he drinks up with his kisses and his own soft entreaties of your name. 

“I’m going to--”

“I want you to--”

“Fill me up, please--”

“Fuck--”

You both lose track of who is actually the one speaking; the words come out in a spill that’s mirrored by the twitch of your thighs and the coil of heat in your stomach. Your orgasm hits you like a train, and your fingers curl into Keigo’s short hair at the same time as he digs his teeth into the soft place where your neck meets your shoulders and his cock pulses inside of you, spilling his seed into your sex, marking you out as his. Your own release gushes over his cock, your cunt clenching around him as you pant and whimper. You’re light-headed and dizzy as you chase your aftershocks, gyrating your hips on his softening cock to eke out every last drop of pleasure you can. Keigo’s hands stay on you, sliding to the small of your back, encouraging you as he sucks and kisses on the bitemarks and lets his own pants fill the air. 

The comfortable silence that follows your releases lasts only a moment. 

He’s come inside of you once, and your body feels full and satiated with your own orgasm, but that’s not enough for Keigo. Even as he pulls out, his cock is already hardening again, a soft groan falling from his mouth as it slaps against the soft flesh of your inner thighs.

“Tell me I can fuck you again,” he murmurs. “I want you to be full of me, birdie. I want you to be dripping with my come for weeks. I need t’fill you up so bad--”

You manage to screw up all of your left-over energy - not that there was much of it - to roll over, gathering yourself up on your hands and knees, spreading your legs further apart and balancing yourself on your elbows. It’s a position the two of you have used often, made all the more comfortable by Keigo’s expensive bed. It means that you don’t have to do much more work than stay there and thrust your hips back into him - and, crucially, it means that Keigo gets so deep inside of you that you swear you feel him in your stomach. 

“Yes,” Keigo breathes, already gathering himself up onto his knees. He drops kisses onto the places on your shoulder blades and spine he scratched earlier, soft feather-light whispers of how much he adores you. “Fuck, angel--”

He fits inside of you like a glove; your earlier exertions making him slide inside of you so easily you barely feel the stretch. Your fingers clench into the sheets as you moan out a prayer that sounds like his name, as Keigo continues to drop wet messy kisses all over you. He’s rambling now, about how beautiful you look like this and how good you feel.

“I should fuck you on every surface in the house,” he whispers, as he begins to work his hips back and forth, sliding easily into a rhythm. “I should christen every single one of them, so it feels like home--”

“Okay,” you breathe in return, moving your hips as much as you can. You’re going to come again, you realise, embarrassingly quickly. He just feels so deep inside of you - like there is no end to where he starts or you begin, like there’s nothing in the universe but the two of you and the places you’re joined. One of his hands slaps over yours, holding it as best he can in the position you’re in. 

“I need to fill you up,” he’s panting. “I need you . . . need you to be mine, need you to know how much I love you, need you need you need you--”

“I need you,” you reply, in a whimper that feels like a sob as he adjusts his hips just so and oh, the spots he hits inside of you with every thrust . . . You feel born anew again; like this is the first time Keigo has fucked you and you’re as sensitive as a virgin. You squeeze your eyes closed. “I need you more-- please fill me up, I want to be yours, please please please--”

“Say my name,” Keigo begs into your ear, the words broken up with pants. “Say you love me.”

“K-Keigo--!” Your voice pitches as your orgasm clenches all up inside of you. You feel yourself tighten around him. The feeling of him inside of you, the wet glide of his cock, the sting of the bites and scratches from your earlier extremely enthusiastic love-making, all converging together until you can do nothing but let the white hot feeling take you over completely. “I l-love you--”

A moaning whimpering groan of your name, and the two of you are coming together. Keigo’s cock is twitching inside of you, spilling more thick ropes of his come as deep into you as he can to join his earlier load. You moan as you feel it trickle down your thighs, as he fucks it in deeper chasing the aftershocks of his orgasm and your body collapses into a jelly-like mass of nothing but feeling. Keigo lets you collapse and follows you down, breathless laughs turning into moans as you lie there for a few moments sweating and panting in the afterglow of your lovemaking. 

It takes a little while for the two of you to disentangle yourself fully; for Keigo’s cock to pop out of you (followed by a little rush of your mixed fluids), for him to drag your sweat-soaked body against him without caring for how you must be messing up the sheets. 

“I love you too,” he says, a belated reply to your call as you’d come. Your face goes hot at the reminder.

You curl up against his chest shyly, cheek pressed to his beating heart. Your fingers come up to trace patterns over his skin, and he makes a noise low in his throat almost like a chirp, pleasure at your touch melding with the pleasure of what has transpired between you both. He’s always a little more bird-like in this state; relaxed and sated and happy. 

A phone rings somewhere in the distance, and he groans. Eyes fluttering shut. 

“It’s in my pocket,” he mumbles in annoyance. “It’ll be the Commission.”

You make a soft noise of displeasure at the Hero Commission already wanting to monopolise his time when it feels like he’s been home for an hour or two at most. 

“I’d hoped we’d have a bit longer this time,” you say, and you hope that you don’t sound petulant. You don’t want to resent Keigo’s job! You know he’s one of the top heroes for a reason! But curled up in bed, it’s hard to reconcile Wing Hero: Hawks and Keigo, your boyfriend, your lover, your home. You want longer with him. You want to keep him for yourself. 

His mouth twists. Resolutely, he wraps his arms back around you. 

“We will,” he says, as he continues to ignore the ringing. “We’ll have more time. They can wait a day. I still have more things I want to do to you.”

“Unfair,” you say, hiding your smile in his chest. “It’s my turn to do things to you.”

He laughs and presses a kiss on the top of your head. The scratches and bruises and bites from your earlier exertions sting pleasantly; a reminder of home, a reminder of Keigo, a reminder of belonging. 

“Okay,” he says, with a faux sigh. “It’ll be a challenge, but I’ll take one for the team. I guess you can do things to me next time.” 

Both of you laugh and snuggle in closer to one another. 

The bed feels so much more right with Keigo in it beside you. 

[slimybeth69]

Venus in Furs

Summary: After saving your life and getting you back to Jackson, things with you and Joel feel different. While navigating this new life, raising a teenager with a man you think you know-- you run into someone unexpected.

WARNINGS: This story contains DARK themes, HIGHLY dubious consent in early chapters. Pregnancy. Pregnancy loss. talks of child abuse. therapy speak. mean!joel, dark!joel, liar!joel. unreliable narration. multiple povs. cheating. mental health- PTSD, PPD. mentions of suicide attempts. highly adult sexual themes.

I'm not kidding when I say that this shit gets dark. I try and keep this as real as fucking possible.

Please be aware of the things you consume and if none of those themes are for you, please think twice about checking this story out.

Before you read this, I recommend reading Crybaby and Such Small Hands. You don't have to, but you'll probably be confused.

unbeta'd- poorly proofread

w/c- ~24k

Part 1

Joel and Ellie both sat outside of the car crying. You had just died twice in Ellie’s arms, but Joel somehow…somehow by the grace of God brought you back both times. You have a tourniquet on your leg and your neck isn’t bleeding anymore. You seemed pretty stable now but the car was broken down and it was still a five hour hike back to Jackson. If Joel left right now, he’d get Tommy to use the horses. Get you back to the colony in another six or seven hours. Joel knew you didn’t have it in you to wait that long but he couldn’t just sit here and let you die. 

“I’ll be back as soon as I can. I’m sorry-- I don't wanna leave you—” Joel kisses the top of Ellie’s head quickly but she stops him from speaking.

“I wouldn’t leave her even if you wanted me to. I’ll stay right here. I promise.” She watches as Joel takes off running. Running with everything he has left in him which isn’t much but he’s going to shave off as much time off this hike as he can. 

Ellie lays down next to you in the trunk. She watches your shallow breathing carefully to make sure that you are in fact still alive. She places one hand in yours and looks at your swollen, bruised jaw. The puncture wound behind your ear is still bloody. Ellie does her best to clean you up with what water she had left. She never slept even though she was still tired herself. She wanted to but her eyes would snap awake the minute they closed to make sure you hadn’t passed in the two seconds she had fallen asleep.

The man Joel used to be is running through these woods. The man who dealt with the beginning of the outbreak. Not a man aged by time and stress and burdens. He was just a carpenter and in decent shape. Joel was running like him right now. He didn’t even bring his backpack, it would have just slowed him down. Just a map and a compass but he ran. Fast. Branches would scratch at his hands and face because he just didn't care about finding a path. He took the fastest route whether it was up or down or through trees or water or mud. It did not matter, nothing could stop this man. He ran like that for almost an hour before his body screamed at him to stop. He had traveled a decent distance in that hour. 

Another hour off his time and he was still moving, his sides cramped and he was slowing down. He had to breathe. Joel had been starting back up the second he felt like he could breathe. But now he needed to regather his strength. This was bad. You were going to die while Joel was hiking in the woods. Poor Ellie was going to have to sit with your dead body for hours. Joel felt so stupid. He should have stopped before he did to give you a tourniquet. He waited too long. Forty minutes of speeding out of the city and getting stuck at barricades and having to backtrack killed you. 

Joel would never forgive himself if you died. He asked you to come! He’s the one who really killed you and that was going to haunt him forever because he was looking forward to being gentle to you for a change. Didn’t think you liked it. Never asked for it. Never complained when he smacked you around and called you names. Joel liked that. Killed you over it. Running again. As fast as he fucking can.

Joel is pounding on Tommy’s door like it’s the end of the word all over again. 

“Joel it’s good to see you—” Tommy looks exhausted when he opens the door. So tired. Like Joel had just woken him up pounding on the door. He had. Tommy had been dead asleep. 

“I need your help, man. Real bad. So bad. Please can we just—” Joel is already down the steps of the porch heading in the direction of the stables. Tommy is so confused but puts his boots on and grabs his jacket. 

“What’s going on man? It’s the girl?” Tommy rushed to Joel’s side as he slipped the jacket over his arms. Joel shakes his head. 

“Different girl. My girl. She’s dyin’, Tommy. Might be dead when we get back there.” Joel sounds like he might cry. It’s a desperate plea for help and he’s only ever heard Joel speak like this once in his life. The night of the outbreak. “She’s all shot up. She’s bleedin’ real bad. I need to get her back here. I need you to help her.” Joel is still running to the stables. He knows where to go. 

“Okay man, we’ll get there. Calm down. You ain’t doin’ her no good if you keel over dead from a heart attack.” Tommy is trying to keep up with Joel. Trying so hard, but Joel is too fast. 

It takes them three and a half hours to get back to the car.

When you are able to finally open your eyes again. It’s four weeks later, but you don’t know that. Everything about you feels like you’re being torn apart from the seams. Your eyes don’t even really open. They just flutter. But then there are hands on yours. From both sides. Who is touching you? Why are they touching you in your sleep? Voices. Muffled ones are speaking to you rapidly and it sounds all jumbled up together. 

In your head you wanted to tell them to please stop speaking to you in Mandarin, because that’s not a language you understand and you needed assistance opening your eyes. Nothing came out though because your mouth feels like someone shoved a cactus down there while you slept. 

Joel did this to you! Joel ruined your throat with his going deepest contest or whatever he did to you in the bedroom yesterday! You should have bit it off of him. If you knew it was going to cause you this kind of pain? No. That was not fair or nice of Joel. Didn’t even give you any possible side effects of going deeper. Not even a cactus in the throat! Why did everything else hurt?. What the fuck. Your eyes do open at this new and sharp pain in your throat. All the other pain is dull and constant and this is sharp and new and only when you try to speak or swallow. Joel is there and you could throttle him for putting you in the hospital! How did an innocent blowjob turn into you being in the hospital? You just wanted to lick a penis for the first time in however many years and now look at you. Hospitalized. 

“Birdie.” Joel’s voice is soothing to you. Very soothing and calming and sweet and you’re not mad at this man. He could go as deep as he wanted. You’d let him. He’s fuzzy. Blurry like maybe you were underwater. “Shhh stop trying to talk. You’re intubated.” 

What is intubated!? What does that mean? You start to panic but everything hurts. Every joint and ligament. Every single fiber of your being aches. Joel leaves your side and now you’re even more scared. You just got here, why is he rushing to be away from you? Ellie’s sweet girl voice is in your ear and also very calming. 

“You need to relax. Just shhh and calm your body. Joel is going to get a Doctor to get the tube out.” What tube!? What is she talking about? Her words do little to calm you now that you have to worry about a tube in you somewhere. What the fuck is going on? The room your in is very similar to that of a hospital—

Ellie is by your side. Ellie is here! And she’s safe and talking to you in your ear and now you are calm because you didn’t have Ellie the last you remember. It’s coming back to you. Joel was walking beside you…touching your pinky with his because he thought that was the last time he was ever going to touch you again while you were still breathing. Ellie places a gentle hand on your upper arm and her warm touch is so comforting. You wish Ellie could crawl into this bed and just wrap you up in her warmth because you are so cold. You did not realize how cold you were. Now you’re shivering. Shivering so bad you think you might actually vibrate off the bed. 

Joel returns with a man in a white coat. 

Judas ! Get this coated man away from you! White coats are bad! Such bad people! They were standing over Ellie’s little frame and now you have to look at Ellie to make sure that she is in fact actually beside you and she is. Her cute face looks worried. Very worried. 

“He’s going to help.” Ellie whispers down to you. 

Then it goes black again.

“Hey, little bird.” Joel’s deep voice fills your small room. He holds flowers out to you. They bring a smile to your face, and now it doesn’t hurt to smile anymore. It does still hurt to talk though. Joel sets them down on the table next to you and sits down in the chair beside your bed. “You feelin’ better today?” He kisses your knuckles softly. You nod, still smiling at him. 

“Yeah.” Your voice is hoarse and croaky from the tube you had been intubated with. Not Joel’s cock like you thought. “Even better now that you’re here.” Joel smiles at this like he’s a young boy and not a fifty-something year old man. 

“We’ve been workin’ real hard to get the house ready for you. Our room is on the first floor so you won’t gotta deal with the stairs.” Joel holds your hand in his gently as he speaks to you, sounding excited. His eyes look excited too. 

Our room.

“I bet Ellie is excited to have the whole upstairs to herself.” You croak. Joel chuckles and nods. “She doin’ alright?” Joel nods and squeezes your hand. 

“Yeah she’s good. Just doesn’t really like comin’ up here— to the hospital. It’s got nothin’ to do with you, Birdie.” You nod in understanding because you don’t even like being here. “She told me to tell you that she misses you. You get to come home tomorrow though.” 

Home. You get to go home tomorrow. With Joel. And Ellie. 

“I know. I don’t blame her. I would have snuck out of here but sneaking is hard when you cannot walk.” Joel smiles as he continues to kiss your knuckles. 

“Birdie—” Joel cuts himself off when he sees the way that you’re looking at him through your eyelashes. “What? What I’d do? I just got here. You were just fine.” He’s worried, he doesn’t know what he’s done to make you upset or…whatever emotion you’re feeling while you look at him distrustfully. 

“Where did Birdie come from? When did you start calling me that all the time? You only ever used to call me crybaby .” You mock the old nickname you used to have. It’s not that you don’t like Birdie. Just curious as to where the fuck he pulled it from. Joel chuckles to himself and kisses your hand once more before letting it rest by your side again.

“I was cleanin’ ya' leg one night and you just kept whimperin’ and chirpin’ out. Sounded like a little birdie.” Joel’s smile is infectious and now you’re smiling back at him as he tells you the rest. “Then I’d make you sing like a lil bird.” His eyebrows flick up and now he’s smiling at you devilishly. “Miss hearin’ you sing for me.” 

Your stomach flutters at his words. Something about his body language too, it’s making between your legs tingle and that feels good . His legs are spread wide in the chair next to your bed, he’s leaning back. He’s relaxed. Joel index finger and thumb tug at the fabric between his legs and he lifts his hips slightly to adjust himself. Your eyes had watched for the whole four seconds it took for him to do that and then you flick your gaze up to Joel’s face.

“Been missin’ ya'. Gonna have to be real gentle with ya'.” He speaks low, almost a growl but it’s hushed. “Be real careful with my little bird.” He’s still leaned back in the chair, relaxed and with his knees as far apart as he can get them in the chair. Now his hands rubbing himself over the front of his jeans gently. You wish you didn’t have this forsaken hospital gown on and tied around the back of your neck because you’d pull it down for him and show him anything. “Say somethin’.” Joel whispers. You had just been watching, wishing you could participate. 

“I need you inside me.” You whisper back to him. Your hand reaches for him but he nods to your chest. 

“Touch ‘em. Squeeze those perfect tits f'me.” Joel’s own hand is now rubbing hard down into the crotch of his jeans. You can see the outline of him growing harder beneath the unforgiving fabric. You bring your one hand up to your chest through the gown and grope yourself in a similar fashion to what he’s doing. He lets out a sigh and his hips start to move slowly against his hand.

Your heart is pounding in your chest beneath your hand. There are people right outside that closed door and any of them could walk in at any minute to come check your vitals and then your temperature. If they do that right now they won’t let you go home tomorrow because you’re surely have high blood pressure and a fever because you’re sweating. You wish you could touch yourself like Joel but your leg is still to swollen and this bed is too small to stretch out the way you need to. 

“I can't wait to taste that fuckin’ pussy. I’ve been dreamin’ about it.” Joel groans softly. “Can’t wait to get my tongue deep inside that tight lil’ hole.” Joel’s words makes your walls contract and nothing is even inside of you yet. Your jaw falls open slightly. 

You’re still a little hesitant with dirty talk yourself. Usually Joel prompts you with things to speak back to him. The way he talks to you makes you blush. Especially now in public! It was never a problem back in the woods which funny enough was only a couple miles from where you lay right now. 

“Where else you want me to lick ya'?” Joel gives you a prompt right now but they’re so hard to think about when all you want to do is get touched! You want to go home right now. This is the first time you and Joel have had a real moment together without doctors and his brother Tommy and Tommy’s pregnant wife Maria. Or people from the town coming to offer support to Joel on the house he was fixing up. You’ve been awake a week and this is your first real uninterrupted moment with him. 

“Everywhere.” You whisper because it’s all you can muster. All of your energy is buzzing between your legs and in your lower belly. It’s almost too much, it feels like you’re too turned on and you’re going to float away with your pelvis leading you upwards. 

“Tell me where.” Joel is leading you, helping you figure out how to talk dirty to him. “Where else do you want my tongue besides your perfect lil cunt?” The words drip off his tongue like molasses. 

The door opens and your hand falls to your side. Joel’s hand moves to the armrest of the chair and he pulls himself into a sitting up position instead of his relaxed, almost laying down prone pose he had just been in quickly. Now he’s sitting, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and his index finger curled over his smirking lips. Your face is red. Redder than you can even imagine. 

“So how are you feel—” The nurse stops and looks at you and cocks her head to the side. “You feelin’ alright, hun? You look a little flushed?” She had not seen what was going on in the room before she walked in so she did not know the reason for all of the blood behind your cheeks. 

You go to speak but just a weak croaking sound comes out. It makes her look more worried and Joel has to stifle a chuckle from beside your bed. You shoot him a glance while you clear your throat.

“I’m fine. Just a little warm in here.” You lie because you had been cold before Joel got in here and steamed the room all up with his sexy words and forceful massages on his hard cock below his jeans. You steal another glance at him and now his eyes are closed and his shoulders are moving up and down softly– he’s laughing! This is funny to him! 

“Aww, well lemme open a window in here for you, sweetheart.” The nurse is so nice and trying so hard to be helpful in your fevered state. You’re so embarrassed. Your nipples are rock hard under your hospital gown and they prove you're lying! It’s an obvious giveaway at your lack of being warm and your current state of arousal. The nurse opens the window and chilled spring air rushes in and makes your nipples even harder! Goosebumps rise on your flesh and you wish she would shut it. You’re no longer a little warm. 

The nurse— her name is Shannon, goes by Shan– takes your vitals and writes everything down on a chart at the end of your bed. 

“Are you excited to go home tomorrow? Been here for almost six weeks. You gotta be ready to sleep in your own bed and be in your own house for the first time!” She’s so excited for you. She’s been your nurse for the entire time and she’s been watching all of this fall into place for you, for the four and a half weeks you were in a coma and then the last week and couple days while you’ve been conscious. She might be as excited as you are. 

“I…cannot wait.” You sigh as she places your chart back in the holder at the end of your bed. “What time do I get to leave?” You’re anxious though, you’d rather just go home right now and don’t understand what a couple hours difference makes. It’s not even a real hospital. It’s a refurbished elementary school that they use in place of a hospital so why can’t you leave now? 

“As soon as you get your last round of antibiotics in the morning after breakfast.” Shan smiles down at you. “You been here longer than any of my other patients, I’ll miss you.” She frowns dramatically. “But now we can go drink at the bar together.” She flicks her eyebrows up once. She was a year younger than you and grew up in Southern California. You have a lot in common with her, she’s fun and is easy to talk to. You have a friend that wants to get drinks with you. 

Shan leaves and Joel is on your mouth before you can look over at him. His tongue is swirling around yours and his hand is on your chest, groping you the way you had been touching yourself but harder, with more aggression behind his hand. He’s moaning into your mouth as your hand finds his still hard cock under his jeans as he leans over you in your hospital bed. Your other hand reaches around the back of his neck and pulls you into him tighter. 

“You’re mine.” Joel whispers against your lips as he pulls away. “Don’t go gettin’ any fuckin’ ideas at that bar. You come home to me. Because you belong to me, understood?” Joel’s words are firm. A verbal declaration of his ownership of you. It makes you feel…uneasy the way he says it like he might actually believe it, and it’s not just bedroom talk. 

“Okay.” You whisper back to him, regardless of that uneasy feeling in your stomach because he’s not…wrong in a sense. You don’t want to be with anyone else. You are his. He is yours. What’s there to feel uneasy about? Joel pulls his head from yours and looks into your eyes.

“Say it.” He’s so serious. 

“I belong to you.” It comes out of you before you can question him, or hesitate at all because the way he’s looking at you is making you a little nervous. “I belong to you.” You say it again after a moment because he doesn’t look away. This time he must believe you because he kisses you again and then sighs softly. 

“Good.” 

Joel says his goodbyes because it’s late. He shuts the window for you first and tucks you into bed. He touches your mound softly over the blankets while he kisses you goodbye. 

Now you’re alone with this new thought in your head of what Joel means by that. It felt like much more than just an admittance of love— that’s actually not what it felt like at all. It was like he was speaking a rule into the universe and now you had to follow it. This felt different than the time he had said it in the bedroom or when you walked out of that abandoned cabin so long ago. Sexy and jokes those felt like. You realize that this is the first time you’ve ever been around other people with Joel who weren’t trying to kill you. 

Oh. 

The next morning your unease is not forgotten but it is overlooked by your excitement to get out of the hospital and sleep in a real bed and to see Ellie. Joel and Tommy ended up going back for the car and fixing it up on the side of the road so that he could drive it back. Now it’s a community car for moments like this. When someone who is unable to walk needs to get around for a longer distance. The whole colony is small but you cannot walk. Not yet. 

“Ellie is so excited to see you.” Joel holds your hand as he drives you to your new house. “I’m glad you’re comin’ home. Been empty there without you.” His words make you smile because you have missed him. So very much. 

“I’m excited to see how you two decorated. It’s probably very interesting.” You smirk at him. You are pleasantly surprised when you walk in and it’s perfect. Nice chairs in the living room and a couch. There are three bedrooms. Two upstairs and one on the first floor. Three bathrooms. You and Joel have your own and there is running water. 

Ellie is at school. Which is weird. School. You’ll have to see if they have classes for people like you who never got to graduate. You missed out on some things and don’t want to be behind when Ellie needs help. 

“Easy, birdie.” Joel eases you down into the large bed, topped with nice soft sheets and a comforter. No more sleepers. “Do you need anything before I go?” Joel asks, sitting on the edge of the bed. You raise your eyebrows.

“Go? Where are you going?” You guys just got here. What is so important? 

“Gotta take the car back. I’ve been helpin’ Tommy around town. Time doesn’t stop just cause you came home today.” He kisses your forehead and you frown. 

“I thought you’d at least stay for a little bit.” You roll your eyes at him. “I get it though. Go be Mr. Carpenter man. Go build buildings and whatever else it is you do.” You smirk. Joel smirks back at you. “Won’t even make me come first.” You playfully turn your nose up at him. 

“And you better not touch it until I come back. I mean it.” He narrows his eyes at you when you turn to look at him. “I’ll know.” 

“How would you know?” You have a snide tone like how is that something he could possibly figure out. Joel doesn’t say anything, he just leans down and kisses you gently on the lips.

“Don’t touch it. Or you get punished.” Another small kiss before he pulls away and is gone before you can ask him what ‘ punished’ means. Punished? Like spanking because you like those. He’d have to wait for another one of his go-as-deep-as-you-can contests or whatever the fuck that was!

Punishment. You had never received one you don’t think. Maybe the spanks but those were not uncommon. The whip had been new and forgotten about in the house. 

That had been a punishment. 

It stung so good though. Was punishment supposed to be bad? Unenjoyable? You don’t know if you’d like to find out. The doctors don’t have pain pills. That’s not a thing. But was is a thing from the past is medical marijuana. The doctor gave you pain management in the form of ten little rolled cigarettes and three brownies. He said do not eat the brownies all at once. They should be cut into eighths. Little small pieces. You have not touched them. You are too scared, that was never something you did before the end of the world! You sucks dicks and snuck out and then also got drunk one time with your friends. You ended up throwing up. 

Smoking weed. No. You will suffer. 

You do suffer until Ellie gets home. 

“Hi!” She runs into your room and hugs you tightly. “I’ve been thinking about you all day! I ran home from school! I have so much to tell you!” 

Ellie tells you that she likes school because now she has friends and people besides you and Joel to hang out with— ouch what the fuck? That is heartbreaking but carry on— there is a girl that Ellie thinks is cute and she has two classes with her. Gym and Old World History. 

“Do you offer to walk her home from school?” You ask, leaning in with your eyebrows raised. “Because you should. Girls like that kind of stuff.” Ellie widens her eyes and takes mental notes. 

“What else?” She asks curiously. 

The next hour is spent explaining how to win over a girl's heart in very specific detail. You go on until the pain in your leg is too much. 

“Okay. I need you to please go to the freezer and can you please cut up one of those brownies into like a million little pieces— actually bring it in here so I can do it.” You do not trust a fourteen year old girl who is probably sneaky! 

Joel walks in the room just as Ellie leaves. He already has a brownie piece in his hand for you. 

“Where are you goin’? You do your homework yet?” He looks down at Ellie who had just stopped herself from bumping into his chest. She shakes her head from side to side and points back to you. 

“I’ve been with her. I was just about to go get her whatever that is.” She points to the square in his hand. 

“It’s her medicine. You stay out of it. Homework before dinner, please?” He is still looking down at her. She nods and grabs her backpack off the floor near your bed. She smiles at you and then her eyes go wide for a moment. 

“We can all eat in here, right? With her? She can’t sit at the table!” Ellie exclaims at Joel, pointing to your leg. He chuckles and takes two more steps in the room. 

“Yes. We can. Go do homework and then start dinner. I’ll come help you in a little bit.” Joel messes with her hair and pushes her head softly. “Go, punk. I’ll be out soon. Shut the door.” Ellie wrinkles her nose at the two of you. 

“Disgusting. You can’t wait until I’m gone!? Or asl—” Joel points with his free hand out the door. 

“Go. Now.” He’s firm with her. She rolls her eyes and marches out the door noisily. 

“Fine. Still gross.” She announces before she shuts the door. 

Joel turns to look at you before he sighs loudly and holds his hand with the brownie in it for you. 

“Doctor said this is pretty potent so you’ll be giggling soon.” He sits down on the edge of the bed and looks at you with big brown eyes. “I got the day off tomorrow. All day. Jus’ me and you. In bed. Bein’ gentle. I’mma wait on you hand and foot and do whatever you ask of me, lil’ bird.” Joel’s country drawl comes out as he speaks and it makes your lower stomach do flips inside of you. “My lil bird.” This really does something to your hips for some reason now because now they’re moving gently against the bed. You still haven’t even taken the brownie from him because you have been hypnotized by his words and his eyes. Joel takes the piece of brownie in between his fingers and reaches towards your opening mouth. He places it on your tongue gently while he looks into your eyes. “Swallow it up, birdie.” He coos softly. You chew quickly. 

It does not taste like any brownie you’ve ever had before! It tastes like a skunk got in here and left a bunch of grass and plants! Barely a treat! You almost spit it out and Joel is laughing at you. With tears in his eyes at your reaction. He can barely look at you, he has to hold his hand up and cover your face with it. 

“Stop.” He laughs. “It’s not–” More choked on laughter. He cannot even speak. “Stop’it. You’re too much.” He’s cracking up! It’s the funniest thing he’s ever seen, apparently. 

“You stop it. That was awful! Where was the brownie!? Where was the chocolate?! It tastes like it grew out of the ground and got sprayed by a skunk!” Joel has bursted out into another fit of laugher, this time tears coming to his eyes while you speak. 

“I’m gonna go take a lil square. You’re hilarious. I can’t imagine you when I’m stoned. Jesus. We’ll be laughin’ all night.” Joel gets up from the bed and gives you a small kiss. “I’ll send her in here to do homework while I get dinner started.” 

Okay! You had nothing to worry about yesterday at the hospital. Joel was just lust filled and let a little of his bedroom voice and words get lost in the real life. It’s fine. It happens sometimes. You are his little bird and he is your… you don’t know. What would you call him? Your boyfriend? You two are grown. That feels so immature but he is not your husband…he has also not even asked you to be his girlfriend…not officially so stop thinking about this nonsense. You will call him Joel as always. 

Ellie skids into the room like she owns the place and falls to her knees on the floor and starts to talk. About everything. Doesn’t stop until Joel comes in with bowls that are steaming with white trails coming off the top. 

He sets a tray down in front of you. You did not realize how hungry you were. This looks amazing. It’s a soup of some kind, maybe a stew. You do not care. Hunger. Hunger has never pandered you in this way before. But your mouth is too dry it will not even open. The room is so quiet too. Joel has given you water on your little tray so you try to drink some. It’s so good. So refreshing. Joel has to get you two more glasses before you even start to eat. 

“Thirsty much? Jeeze.” Ellie judges you but she doesn’t know what condition you’re in. You’re high for the first time. It’s horrifying. 

“Leave her alone. She’s goin’ through it right now. Her medicine is strong.” Joel look at you from the chair he’s sitting in. You start giggling because you are going through it. Your heart is racing and everything feels like it’s moving too slow. 

“What is this?” You ask Joel holding the soup up in your spoon. Your eyes feel so heavy but you are not tired. Not even in pain anymore, really. Your whole body just…doesn’t. It doesn’t feel like anything. 

“Soup?” Joel gives you a worried look but you look into the bowl in awe. 

“No, what kind of soup.” You ask, looking back up at him now. Joel chuckles and shakes his head. 

“Venison.” He explains as he takes his own spoonful. Ellie pipes up from the floor beside you. It startles you because you forgot she was here. You almost drop your spoon of soup. You look down at her in fear.

“It’s good. Try some.” She sounds so innocent and here you are. High and dying in bed. Unable to swallow the soup you’ve up in your mouth because you forgot how to swallow. 

What had Joel given you? What was in that horrible brownie!? 

“Is she going to be okay?” Ellie asks, and you had once again forgotten she was there and it scares you. 

“I have to go to bed.” You sigh and lay back against the pillows.

“Nope. We should go. C’mon. Let’s go eat at the table. Crybaby here can’t handle her shit.” Joel jokes. You do not see what happens next because your eyes are closed and your trying to remember if you breath from your left or right lung first…you cannot remember having to worry about this before but it has become the biggest issue in your brain right now. “C’mon. She’s gonna need to take a long nap.”

Everything feels so warm and so good. Your eyes are still closed and breathing is no longer an issue, it’s on automatic again and you can rest, not having to worry about shifting the gears of your body any longer. Everything is good and warm and wet and between your legs is throbbing in the best way. Your hips move slowly for some reason. It’s unknown to you why they’re doing that. Your hand is gripping something. Hair maybe. You don’t know. 

“Such a good little girl for not touching her pussy.” The voice is deep and not coming from beside you. “So obedient.” It sounds like it’s close, the voice. Joel's voice. Your hand pushes back against the hair and you feel his head between your legs. “Oh do you want Daddy to stop?” Your walls clench around nothing when he speaks to you, and now your hand is pulling his hair closer to your middle again. He wraps his lips around you and presses his flat tongue against your clit. He moves it up and down slowly against the swollen nub he had been working on for the last forty minutes while you slept. 

“Keep going, Daddy.” You whisper softly in your half-asleep state. This sends a shock to Joel’s system. He’s pressing his mouth harder against you, his two fingers that had been playing with your slit push inside of you.

“Say it again.” He growls against your cunt. 

“Keep going, Daddy.” You repeat yourself, but it’s moaned now at the feeling of his fingers inside of you. 

“You love when Daddy touches his little princess? ” He whispers as his fingers curl inside of you. You nod and moan quietly, arching your back at his touch “Say it to me then.” His country drawl between your legs vibrates something inside of you.

“I love when Daddy touches me.” These are not words you speak! You do not say things like that but they’re coming out of your mouth. Your brain still feels so fuzzy. But everything else feels so good. Waves of pleasure wash over you as Joel goes back to swirling large circles around your clit, his fingers still moving inside of you. But now your body moves with each thrust of them into your cunt. 

“I love your lil pussy, baby.” Joel whispers softly. It makes your already dizzy and foggy brain spins more when he talks low like that against you. “I wanna feel baby come on Daddy’s fingers.” Now he’s curling them against you now but now slowly. Quickly. It makes your breath hitch in your throat. You haven’t been able to open your eyes, it’s like they’re glued shut. “Then Daddy is going to get you pregnant.” 

Your hips move wildly against his fingers and tongue. It’s so fucking hot to be spoken to that way and you’ve never been spoken to like this. It makes your slickness leak out against Joel’ fingers. He curls his two fingers inside you quicker as his tongue tightens around your clit into those good circles. Those movements with meaning. 

“Come for Daddy.” Then his tongue is back on you. You obey him because why would you not? It’s been building inside of you since you woke up, or maybe this was a dream in your influenced state. You gush, that good feeling. Joel is between your legs when you open your eyes and look down at him. He’s got your good leg up on his shoulder and he’s still making you come.

Your head falls back into the pillows and your grip in his hair tightens. His naughty words, taboo words do something to you. Make you come harder than you ever have. The drugs make everything feel better too. 

“Daddy’s gonna fuck his princess now.” He leans up and your good leg stays on his shoulder. 

“Okay, Daddy.” You whisper, your hand finds the back of his neck. You can feel him pressing the head of his cock into your entrance and you almost want to go back to sleep. Your head is so heavy.

“Shhhh baby, go back to sleep. Let Daddy do all the work.” He whispers into your ear as he thrusts himself into you. It jolts you, eyes open again and now your gripping on to Joel as he fucks you, short gentle bursts to not hurt your other leg. “You like getting fucked like this?” He growls down to you.

“Yes.” You respond, still groggy and fuzzy headed. “I do.” 

“Yes, I do… what ?” He licks the arch of your ear gently as he speaks. His moves inside of you are calibrated. He knows exactly what to do to make you tremble below him. Make you say anything he wants. 

“Yes, I do. Daddy.” You please him when you speak because he lets out a guttural moan and now he thrusts inside you deeply, pulling his hips back far until just the tip of him is inside of you. 

“That’s a good girl. I love fucking this perfect slutty cunt. I love it so fucking much. So fucking flthy and perfect.” He groans as he holds onto one of your hips, the other is holding your ankle up to his shoulder. “You have to ask to come from now on, you better fuckin’ ask you you’ll get punished, okay, baby?” You nod, listening to his words. They're almost drown out by the feeling building inside of you. 

“O-o-ookay.” You whimper. Joel laughs at you! Laughs into your ear and mocks you. 

“Oo-okay.” He keeps laughing. “Sound fuckin’ stupid. My cock make you stupid? Huh?” You don’t know what to say because you’re not stupid just getting fucked and you’re stoned. “Open up.” Joel speaks before you can and you open your mouth. He moves his head and looks down at you, spitting into the back of your throat. Before you can close and swallow, one hand comes to grip your face, forcing your mouth back open. Joel does it again, leans in until his mouth is almost on yours and spits onto your tongue. “Stupid slutty baby.” Joel whsipers into your saliva filled mouth. “Stupid as the day I met you.”

You come. Hard all over Joel’s cock. He laughs again because you already forgot the rule he just gave you. You couldn’t help it. He just made you feel so good with his dirty fucking words and the way he was thrusting inside of you. 

“Oh, just wait for Daddy to think up a punishment for his girl. He didn’t think it’d happen so fast.” Joel coos down to you lovingly. “Love feeling you fucking come on my cock though. You better do it again before the night is over, babygirl. My sweet little girl.” He’s still holding your face with his hands while he fucks you and talks down to you this way. You’re soaked between your legs and so is he while he slams himself inside of you.

“C-can I come again, Daddy?” You purr up to him as he drives another powerful forced thrust into your hips. 

“No.” It’s short and with no explanation of why. You assume this is punishment. Joel moves his hips in short, speedy bursts. “Say you love Daddy and that you like— fuckin’ hell you’re so god damnned tight— tell Daddy you love him and that you like his cock in you like this.” Joel snaps it out quickly at you. “Then you can come. With me. You fucking whore.” You are so desperate for release and so high still that you just repeat what he told you to say. They flow out of your mouth effortlessly.

“I love you, Daddy. I love your c-cock in my pussy like this. Love when you lick my cunt, Daddy.” You throw in your own little flavor, see if it makes him happy and it does because he gives you the command, gives you release as he drives into you faster now.

“Come. Come for Daddy. You’re such a filthy whore. I love your stupid fucking cunt so god damned much, Jesus Christ.” Joel groans all those words out as he continues to thrust. You can feel his cock throb inside of you as he does it. He’s filling you. Another orgasm, your second or third. You cannot remember. As soon as it leaves your body you are asleep in the sheets and the pillows below Joel.

When you wake up it’s light outside and Joel is still in bed next to you, also asleep. Everything feels…strange. Like you’re still in a dream somehow. 

You need less fucking medcine that for fucking sure. What the hell happened to you last night? Couldn’t eat dinner? Had the weirdest fucking dream… the weirdest fucking dream you’ve ever had. You’ve never said the words you spoke in that dream before. It’s yucky and weird and you do not like it. Not really…you don’t think. The dream has thoughts racing through your head. Joel was penetrating you between your legs in this dream! Maybe that won’t bother you so much when your able anymore. You don’t know when your leg stops hurtin’ so fuckin’ bad you wanna try!

“You awake, lil bird?” Joel asks groggily from behind you. You wrap one hand around his wrist to keep it from moving. He’s wrapped around your waist and you’re not ready for him to get up yet. “Okay…jeez. Don’t gotta squeeze so hard.” He teases, pressing gentle kisses behind your ear. You hold him to you and take in the fact that you don’t have to leave. No traveling. No running. No quests. Just you and Joel in this bed until Ellie got home and then you could be a normal family but right now you were going to be with this man for as long as you could.

“You really get to stay all day?” You turn your head to look at him. He nods and kisses your lips softly. 

“All day.” Joel's voice is so deep. It reminds you of the dream you had.

“I had the weirdest dream last night.” You chuckle softly. “So weird. Might even be too weird for you.” You look flick your eyebrows at him. He narrows his eyes onto yours.

“Tell me.” He growls it, like he’s so excited he cannot wait to hear this dream you had. 

You replay the whole thing. Say all the words and Joel watches and smirks. You’re shocked because he looks like he likes this. 

“Did you like that dream?” Joel asks, once your finished. You think for a minute and nod. You remember the dream pretty well for it being a dream…and you being higher than a kite for the first time. 

“I’ve never called anyone one that before. It sounds so weird.” You blush because it is…very naughty. Joel tips its head from one side and then to the other slowly, like he’s thinking. His finger traces along your bellybutton.

“It is a little weird. But it’s just cause you haven’t said it before.” Joel looks down into your eyes, he’s resting on his elbow. “Different things feel weird sometimes. Remember when I put it in your ass?” He raises his eyebrows at you and smirks. You blush again and nod. “I think it’s hot as hell. You should start calling me that when I fuck you.” Joel leans down and kisses you gently. You expect more, for things to go somewhere because of this sexy conversation but he pulls away. “Will you?” He’s looking for an answer right now.

“I guess. I don’t know. Let’s try it out soon and see how it goes?” You look up at him with your big eyes and he nods again. 

“Yeah, we’ll see, Princess.” Joel leans down and kisses your temple softly and gets up to leave to go to the attached bathroom. 

You think for a moment and try to remember if you told him about the part when he called you princess and you don’t think you did. You focused mainly on the fact that you were calling him daddy. You rack your brain and try to remember but you cannot. How can you remember a dream so well that happened while you were under the influence but not something you said four seconds ago? Strange. Blame it on the weed and the titillating dream you had last night. 

Joel brings you coffee and you ask him what compelled him to call you princess. His eye do something…strange. Like…maybe flash to the side quickly before he gives you his very loving and caring response.

“Because that’s what you are today. A princess. My Princess.” Joel sips his own coffee and sits back next to you in bed. “Gonna treat you like one all day. How’s your leg feeling?” He nods down to it with his head. You shrug. Something about this whole princess thing has you feeling a little on edge.

“Fine.” You say, looking down into your cup of instant black coffee that tastes like soy sauce but it does perk you up a little. Just a little as you drink it. Joel pushes some hair behind your ear and calls you like a cat. 

“Pst.” It’s quick but it does what he wanted, it makes you look at him. “Wanna smoke a joint with me?” He has another devilish grin on his face but this one is far more innocent then the last time he did it in the hospital room. You nod because now that Joel is with you, it doesn’t seem so scary to be high. He goes to the top drawer of his dresser and brings out one of those rolled cigarettes and a lighter. He lights it for you and then hands it to you after puffing softly. 

“So we’re gonna get high and what? Struggle to breathe again? Because I struggled for a while last night before I fell asleep.” You hand the joint back to him after hitting it twice. It makes you cough but you sip your soy-sauce-coffee and it helps a little. Joel chuckles as he hits the joint a couple times and opens the window of the room. The breeze feels nice.

“You can struggle to breath and I can lick that perfect cunt. If you want me to?” Joel leans against the wall beside the window and you sigh. You want him too but you’re sore. Your leg and your whole middle just aches. 

“I don’t know. I think it might be too soon? Hurts today. Worse than it did yesterday.” You take the joint from Joel’s outstretched hand. “Weird. Must be from all the moving around. Getting into the house and everything.” Joel nods in agreement and crosses his arms over his chest. 

“Do you want a couple extra pillows? More blankets? Anything for you, crybaby.” Joel takes the joint from your outstretched hand and you wave your hand at him after. 

“No more.” You cough softly. “Can’t do it anymore.” You wheeze. Joel chuckles and pinches the cherry with his fingertips after he licks them. “Yes to pillows. No more blankets. I’m sweating. Joel places the joint on the window sill and pulls the sheets back. You have no shorts or underwear on. You cannot remember if you put them on when you got home…no. Joel didn’t put any on after he gave you a little thorough sponge bath. Just the nightgown. 

“You alright?” Joel asks, noticing you looking into your lap. 

“Just wonderin’ where my panties are.” You smirk up at him. He smirks back at you. 

“I never put ‘em back on you after the hospital. Easier access.” He kisses your forhead and leaves the room to go shower.

When would he have needed access? And easily?

Joel comes back from the bathroom and you are giggly. 

“Come snuggle with me.” You hold your arms out to him and smile up at him with hooded, bloodshot eyes. Your arms feel like they weigh 4 billion pounds. Joel looks down at you from the side of the bed and crawls over to you. 

“Oh, Birdie wants me to hold her? Pet her real gently ?” He coos into your ear as he takes you into his arms. You nod and close your eyes, pressing the uninjured side of your body into him. “I love taking care of you. I love protecting you.” Joel kisses the side of your face gently. 

“Keep talkin’.” You murmur softly as you snuggle back down into bed. All anxieties you ever had are gone. This is much better than the brownie, if you could even call it that. Joel chuckles as he kisses across your face all over gently and slowly. 

“I was scared I was gonna lose you. I ran so fast to get here so I could bring you home.” Joel whispers sweet words against your skin. “My whole world is here now. In this bed. At school. Right here and I don’t have to move mountains or kill people to keep them safe anymore.” Joel’s voice is making your body buzz. “I would though. I’d kill anyone who ever touched you.” He goes back to kissing your cheeks and now your eyelids and forehead. 

“Do you want to be my boyfriend?” You open your eyes as much as you can in your state and smile up at him because he is…technically…already your boyfriend? You think? You do not know. Joel looks down at you now, also with hooded bloodshot eyes and nods slowly. 

“I do, baby. I thought I already was.” He leans down and kisses your lips softly. You giggle against his mouth and close your eyes again because it’s too much work to keep them open. 

“I thought that too! I was just thinking about it, but we never talked about it. And I like to talk about things. I do.” You nod up at him with your eyes still closed. “I can’t stop thinking about that dream, Joel.” You whisper up to him. He leans down and breathes softly against your mouth. 

“Call me Daddy, I like hearing you say it.” 

“Okay, Daddy.” You murmur and he kisses you softly after the words leave your mouth. He sighs loudly from his nose as he does it, the hot air expelled against your lips and cheeks. It makes you dizzy knowing you do that to him. 

It feels good to make him do stuff like that. Moan and groan and sigh like he is. You want to keep him making those sounds so you’ll do as he says. Because you like being a princess and you like being a good girl. Pleasing Joel makes you happy. You know it in your heart. Joel pulls away from you now. 

“Gonna teach you how to use that mouth. Make it filthy like mine.” Joel draws it out in his Texas accent. “You wanna learn how to talk like a slut since I fuck you like one?” 

“Yes, Daddy.” You nod your head. He holds your face in his hand and presses on your cheeks with his fingers where your teeth meet, forcing it open. He spits into it, twice. He holds your mouth open like that. 

“Speak more. Say more than two fuckin’ words.” He spits into your mouth again and lets it go with a soft push. “Swallow.” You obey and open your eyes to look up at him. He’s looking down at you with his brown eyes and they’re so dark. You love them. His graying facial hair, his dark, thick messy mane. Love everything about him. 

“Yes, Daddy. I’ll use m-my filthy mouth— just like you want me to. Like a g-good g-girl.” You look up at him and he shakes his head from side to side like he's disappointed. Your heart shatters.

“G-g-good g-girl.” He mocks you gently. “Lose the fuckin’ stammer unless I got my hands on you. It makes you sound stupid. I only want you cock stupid. Come stupid. Be confident in yourself, baby. You can do it. ” He presses the back of his fingers to your cheek gently and drags them down to your jaw.

“I’m sorry, Daddy. I’m just nervous.” You whisper up to him honestly. Joel growls lowly from his throat and presses his forehead to yours. “Don’t be mad at me, Daddy.” Joel presses his forehead against yours tighter after you speak like he’s frustrated with you, trying to hold back something. When he speaks it’s like he’s snarling.

“That is fucking perfect." Joel is so proud of you somewhere in that deep snarl of approval. His voice quickly changes to very sweet and comforting. "Have to just be confident, baby girl.” Joel is rocking his hips against the side of your good thigh, you can feel his length against your skin, he’s ten thousand degrees and it’s making your head spin. “Talk about your cunt, sweetie. Daddy loves hearing you talk about it.” You want words to come out of your mouth but it feels like you have literal charcoal dust in your mouth. It’s sucked all the moisture out and now, you’re tongue is stuck to the roof of your mouth. “Awwww, cat got your tongue, lil girl?” He whispers into your ear.

“Water.” You gasp. Joel shoots out of bed and into the bathroom, he returns with a glass of water and a throbbing erection right at face level. Your bloodshot eyes stare at it as he hands you the glass of water. You try to take it from him but your eyes are not looking for water now, they’re glued to his cock and you’re just reaching for air—near the glass but not even touching it. Your hand opens and closes around nothing as he makes it flex and jump in front of your face. 

“Cock stupid. That’s how I like you. Look’it you. Can’t take your eyes off it.” Joel pushes his hips forward towards you. You reach out with your other hand and try to touch him but he pulls away. “No.” It’s stern and makes you look up at him, now his eyebrows are furrowed and he’s pressing the glass of water into your outstretched hands. “Nope. Not for you. Not today or tomorrow or the next.” You bring the glass to your lips and gulp as your eyes go wide in a lack of understanding. “Punishment. You don’t get to touch. You don’t get to come. You don’t get to do nothin’ but talk. And swallow. ‘Cause Daddy still has to come, right baby?” He nods down at you as you drink the entire glass of water. “Say it.” You hold the empty glass in your lap. 

“You’re right, Daddy.” You gasp, looking up at him now and he presses his thumb against your bottom lip, drags it down and then releases it. It snaps back up to your upper lip with a small, hollow popping sound. He grins down at you. 

“You’re so fuckin’ good. God damn. I got fuckin’ lucky.” His voice is so deep. “Princess hungry? I’ll make us eggs. Got some fresh bread from the neighbor so I can make toast too.” You nod silently. 

In your high…paranoid state maybe something is telling you that this doesn’t feel…normal. This isn’t how a boyfriend spoke to their girlfriends…right? You don’t know. You only had one when you were fifteen and he used to call you ‘shorty’, so baby girl and princess and… cock stupid are better than that? Yes? You don’t fucking know. What even is a boyfriend? A man who loves you and cares for you and protects you and Joel does all those things. What’s the issue? He was in your kitchen, making you eggs naked. With his big fucking cock swinging between his legs and you LOVE that. So much. It’s the most amazing experience you’ve ever had. Want to continue to have it. 

You think.

You don’t know! It was fun— so much fucking fun, trekking through the woods every four nights a couple months ago. Sneakin’ around. Bein’ disgusting in that cabin together. Now he’s speaking to you in this way and it makes you feel so many different things. Disgusting still, yes–absolutely. You love it but now you…care for him? But he also makes you…nervous? The man sprinted through the cocksuckin’ woods for five hours to get you to safety. Rode all the way back to you on horseback and then held you on his horse the entire way back. Your cold and almost dead body. He must care for you. Has to. Who would do that for someone they just wanted to fuck and call names? Who?!

“Why you lookin’ so fretful?” Joel asks as he walks in with a plate of food for you. You can eat this time. The eggs and toast go down so easily. You look around the room like there is a buffet in here you can go up and get seconds at but there is just dressers and wood. No more food. You whine quietly in frustration when you realize there is not even a crumb left for you to lick off the plate. Joel looks at your empty plate and swaps with you, giving you the last half of his breakfast. “For Princess. Hurry up and finish though. You gotta shower and try to get up and move. Doctors orders.” 

The shower is fuckin’ cold—what the fuck? You’re not a stranger to a cold dip in the river or a bird bath in the sink but a whole shower of freezing cold water felt more like a punishment than not being able to come for three whole days. You could do it. You had just gone however many fucking weeks without it. What’s three more days? 

“Put your leg up here.” Joel taps the calf of your bad leg and then points to the edge of the tub. You carefully rest your foot up on it and keep all your weight on your good leg. Joel washes you with soap. He gets into every crevice and fold you have and then he rinses. He does that with the rest of you. Then he shuts the water off and looks at you, shivering, leaving up against the wall of the shower. “Keep your leg up there.” He rests one hand on the side of your head and leans into you while looking into your eyes his other hand pressed tightly against your cunt. He starts to rub. "Let Daddy touch that pussy."

You didn’t think he was going to let you and now you’re hips are working against his fingers, pushing into his hand harder. He lets you and chuckles against your cheek as he kisses you.

“Yeah baby, move those hips. Get yourself nice and wet for Daddy.” His voice grumbles so deeply. You moan softly as he stiffens his hands and quickens his movement against you. Fast, back and forth against your clit. You’re still shivering and now, sliding up and down slightly on the slick wall behind you. “Fuck yeah.” Deep gravel country drawl in your ear as he slips two fingers into your folds and up inside of you. He curls them, fast and aggressive like he’s trying to pull you closer to him from inside of you. It's so intense and almost feels like it's too much. It makes you moan loudly. Joel sighs and works his fingers faster. 

“Oh, fuck. Yes, Daddy. Can I please come?” It brings you there so fast, your good knee starts to buckle and he pulls his fingers away at just the last moment, you were just about to release all over him. Your eyes open in horror as you watch him suck his two fingers clean. Entirely. Joel shakes his head no, down at you. 

“Nope. Did you forget? You come stup– you didn’t even come. You just actin’ stupid. Knock it off.” Joel leans in and kisses your forehead. “C’mon. You’re chitterin’ and shivering like crazy.” 

Joel dries you. Changes your bandage after he cleans your gunshot wound. Puts you in sweatpants and a t-shirt. Comfy clothes. The first comfy clothes you’ve worn in years. You can put a small amount of weight on your leg. It hurts with each step but you can do it, Joel holds on to your arm on your weak side to give you some support. 

“Perfect. You got it.” Joel kisses the side of your head as you sit gingerly at the kitchen table. You watch him as he goes into the kitchen and looks in all the cupboards. 

Denying you a good come. How dare he? You didn’t think he’d be bringing you right there, point to it and say ‘hey, you see that right there? Put your hand on it, touch it’ and then the minute you fucking reach for it, he pulls you away and goes ‘hahahaha you’re so dumb, idiot’. What the fuck was that? Come denial!? Is that even a thing?

Joel returns with more toast but this time it has jam of some sort on it. 

“I got the jam from the neighbor woman as well. Her name is Ava.” Joel sits down at the table with you. “She’s nice. Lil bit older than you maybe. Just her in the house. She’s two doors over. Nice lady.” Joel watches you eat. 

Who the fuck is Ava? And why does Joel know so much about her? Hmph. You do not like this Ava even though she makes great bread and good jam. It’s not very sweet but whatever. Neither was the brownie. Sugar must be scarce. Stop making sweets then and try to pass them off as sweets! 

“It’s good.” You say, holding up the jammed toast. “I’ll have to go thank her myself.” You say this but you do not mean it. You will thank her but mostly you’ll limp over there in your best sweat pants and your best t-shirt and you’ll eye up the competition. Because why is she giving your boyfriend jams and bread? This is all coming from nowhere, because you have been hospitalized, in a literal coma. She was probably just being nice but look at Joel! Look’it him! He’s handsome and he’s King Swinging Fuckin’ Big Dong and you can see it. Even when he’s not excited it just sits there in his jeans. You have to tell Joel to get less tight jeans! Oh no! There are other women with eyes around now and they can see it too and this terrifies you. You start to sweat.

“What are you fuckin’ thinkin’ about? Your eyes are movin’ ten million miles a minute, birdie.” Joel sounds concerned about you.

“Do you see Ava often?” You look at him now and take another bite of your toast which you now feel is suddenly too dry. Ava is the worst. Can’t bake for shit. The worst. Joel drops his chin to his chest and looks at you through his thick, beautiful eyelashes. “What!? I can’t ask questions?” You avoid his beautiful eyes now. They’re judging you.

“What if I did?” Joel asks suddenly. You almost drop your toast, you fumble it around between your hands for two seconds before you look at him. 

“Do you?” How dare he tell you not to get ideas while potentially going out with your friend, but he gets to go over to Ava’s house whenever he wants? What was he doing with Ava while you were in the hospital? 

“Maybe.” Joel smirks. “Why?” He’s enjoying this. Enjoy seeing you jealous over him. “She’s a baker. I like baked goods. So do you, apparently. She is also one of Ellie’s teachers at school.” 

“Oh. Okay.” Is all you say. That’s it. Jealousy and anger and now sadness wash over you. 

“Oh stop’it.” Joel bats at your hand gently. “She ain’t as fun as—”

“How would you know how much fun she is or isn’t!?” You exclaim, now tossing the piece of toast in your hand on the plate in front of Joel. “How would you even know that?” Joel is laughing. 

“Someone is jealous. A jealous lil bird.” You give him the finger and rest your head on your fist. “Put that bird away before I punish you again. Did you forget our chat about bein’ disrespectful that one time, baby?” He leans in and gives you a lashed, chin-in-his-chest look. “I’ll give it to you this time cause I was eggin’ you on but don’t forget your place.” 

“And what’s my place?” You look at him seriously. Joel sits up, slides the plate in front of him out of the way, folds his hands in front of himwhere the plate had been and looks at you just as seriously. 

“Below me.” Joe is stern. Serious. Not bedroom talk. “You’re my woman. My bird. My slut. That’s my pussy. You. Are. Mine.” He’s growling at you. “You want to be here? You have a choice. I won’t hold you fuckin’ hostage. But if you stay, there’s gonna be rules and you’ll follow them.” His eyes are locked on to yours. “This ain’t no fun game out in the woods, Birdie. This is real life now.”

“What rules?” You ask, not taking your eyes off him either. Your heart is pounding in your chest. You swallow hard as Joel leans into the table. 

“Whatever I say, Birdie.” He whispers. “I don’t ever want to hurt you. I like to bring you pleasure. I like making you happy. Seeing you smile.” He smirks at you and reaches for your hand with one of his hands. You don’t take it yet, he has more to say. “I’ll give you everything. A house. A husband. I’ll put a fuckin’ baby or two into you. You just gotta do as I say. Love me. Be a good mom. I’ll give you the whole fuckin’ world, babygirl. You just gotta follow the rules.” His hand on the table urges for yours softly. You place your hand in his because he doesn’t want to hurt you. Doesn’t want you to come for three days but that’s fine. “You saved me. I owe you my whole life, Bird.” His eyes soften and he squeezes your hand gently. You sigh before you respond to him, because he’s right. And so do you.

“I owe you mine.”

Joel made himself come twice into your open mouth before it was no longer just the two of you home alone. Jerking himself off with your help as he stood over you on the bed. You talked dirty up to him and touched his balls for him. The sound and faces he made...you've never gotten so wet before watching him do that to himself.

“It stinks in here; like a skunk.” Ellie wrinkles her nose as she walks into your room and sits on the bed next to you. “Did you shower today?” She teases and rests her head on your shoulder. You rest your head on hers. 

“I did shower. It’s my medicine for my leg. Stinky. Gross.” You wrinkle your nose even though she can’t see you.

“Makes you fucking act weird.” She laughs softly. “You almost fell asleep in your soup last night. Laughing! You were laughing in your sleep too!” She is accusing. “Never seen any kind of medicine like that before.” She murmurs. 

“Me either, kid. It’s all brand new to me. Do you have homework? You know Joel is going to get on you about it.” She leaves your bed for a moment and then grabs her book bag to bring back to you. 

She does homework sprawled out on yours and Joel’s bed for the next hour while you watch her and answer questions she has about Old World History. 

“No. Osama Bin Ladin. Sadam Hussein is a different guy. I think. Yeah, they’re different.” You point to something on a piece of paper she has. “I was there that day. The day the towers fell. My family had been in the city. We weren’t supposed to be but damn. It was fuckin’ crazy.” You whisper to her. 

“Worse than the outbreak?” She looks over to you as you stare into space and remember something from so long ago that you haven’t thought of in so long. 

“No. Just different.”

The night of the outbreak had been…chaotic to say the least. Your dad had been well armed and had already packed the car. After the first gunshot your dad said it was time to go. Couldn’t wait for your sister. You and your mom left a note on the counter in the kitchen in case she showed up and told her where you were going but you didn’t ever make it to your final destination. You had driven through the state of New York and into Ohio. You had planned on going to California because that's where your brother said things were looking good. Like they had things under control but once the gas ran out and you could no longer stop and get more… You had to walk. 

Your mom died almost immediately. She had not been ready for all of this. She was scared and jumpy and couldn’t keep her big, New Jersey mouth shut. Ever. It felt like three minutes you were out of the car and she was gone. You and your dad walked, ran, survived together for so fucking long. You remember when Ellie asked if he was nice. He was not. He was mean. Didn’t understand why you couldn’t shoot a gun right away. Didn’t understand why you were scared. Pushed you around while you hiked through the Canadian wilderness. You crossed the border in Minnesota somewhere and then dropped back down into the states somewhere in Montana. You dad fell, stabbed himself in the leg with his own knife and died, septic while you sat by and watched, unable to help. You walked and walked for so fucking long. You had been traveling for twelve years. Camping in colonies peppered all over. You always move after a while though. Finally settled in Wyoming. Found this colony a while before Joel showed up but liked being on your own.

That wasn’t like the day the towers fell. Not even a little bit. 

Ellie and you sat like that for another hour until Joel came in with dinner. You wanted to ask if he got that from Ava too, but with Ellie right here, you don’t. Ellie talks about her day at school while you all eat. 

A game of Sorry! is played on the bed after dinner. You give Ellie a kiss on the cheek before she goes to bed.

You and Joel smoke the rest of the joint from earlier before he crawls into bed with you. 

“Let Daddy suck your tits, baby girl.” He’s pushing your shirt up but you fight him softly. 

“You’re not going to let me come, so why torture me?” You whine as he licks from your belly button up to your sternum. 

“Cause I want to. Simple.” Joel forces your shirt up over your chest and takes the hard peak of your breast into his mouth, his tongue swirling around the bud quickly. 

“Joel, it’s to—”

“What’d you call me?” He snaps his head up to look at you, his eyes focused on yours. It’s almost alarming. “You just call me by my name?” 

“I’m s-sorry, Daddy.” You look down at him as he resumes his lapping and sucking of your tits. 

“Talk dirty to me babygirl, like Daddy showed you earlier.” Joel says this with your nipple between his teeth. It makes you groan softly. This is the first time that he’s ever put his mouth on you like this. It’s fucking exhilarating You’ve never had a mans mouth on your nipples like this before. It feels so fucking incredible. 

“Suck on my tits, Daddy. I like w-when you bite them.” You whimper softly as he bites down on the other nipple, now with a little more force at your words. He pulls his head back and lets your bud slip from within his teeth, they rake against your sensitive peak. It draws a whine from your throat. 

“Fuckin’ Jesus. Keep fuckin’ talkin, baby.” Joel’s straddling your good thigh, thrusting against your skin, you can feel him again. His screaming hot length against your upper thigh. Something comes over you. You want to see if you can get him to forget punishment. Forget all about it like you forget things when you’re pleasure filled.

“I want you to fuck me, Daddy. I want your cock in every single one of my holes.” You whisper up into his ear. Joel grips your hip with one of his hands and looks down into your eyes. 

“Don’t stop.” He murmurs softly, his hips thrusting faster now. 

“Put it inside me, please. I’ll be a good girl.” You speak softly…innocently, up to him. Joel has to clench his eyes shut and press his forehead against yours. “Please, Daddy?” Joel lets out a guttural moan before he opens his eyes and looks down into yours. “Please. You can get me pregnant.” You whimper again, batting your eyelashes softly. He groans from deep in his chest.

“Fuuuck.” Joel rips his head away from yours and moves his other knee to between yours and throws your good leg up onto his shoulder and holds your ankle there as he places himself at your entrance while he strokes himself with his fist. “ You’re fuckin’ naughty. ” Joel growls as he pushes just his hips forward, driving himself into you quickly. It jolts you and suddenly…you have a flash of deja vu. This was in your dream you had the other night. 

“Joel—” He puts his fingers into your mouth to quiet you. 

“Don’t fuckin’ call me that in here- not in the bedroom. I’m your fuckin’ Daddy in here, do you understand me?” Joel is harsh with you as he continues to thrust into you vigorously. “Suck.” He coos now, down to you as you wrap your lips around his fingers, swirling your tongue. “Good fuckin’ Princess.” He grips your ankle tighter as he fucks you.

You’re walking this threshold of being scared and also very turned on. You think you’re in love with Joel. You don’t know why. Something about being with him all the time and how good he is to you outweighs the fear of the things he says and does to you in the bedroom because he’s not really ever hurting you. Never. If he did it was always consensual and it ended when you spoke up about it. You don’t think that is his ever his intention.

But something about all of this, being high and so fucked up while he touches you…feels good but it doesn’t necessarily feel nice. It feels like you’re being…used. Or taken advantage of! That's it! Taken advantage of in your high state. Even though you begged for this- were you really the one begging for it? You’re so high you don’t fucking know and the weed makes you so paranoid. So fearful for some reason…but you had been afraid in the hospital too. Everything was so confusing and maybe you just wouldn't smoke anymore weed. You’d just be in pain but clear headed from now on. 

“Fuck baby girl. Yes. Let Daddy come inside you.” Joel groans loudly. You feel his cock twinge inside of you. This orgasm is long and he moans and thrusts himself inside of you the entire time. You feel like he comes forever. Where does he get it all? 

He came while you were lost in thought! You hadn’t even been focused on coming! Jesus Christ. Your own plan— foiled with dumb thoughts!

“And she followed her punishment. Good fuckin’ girl.” He growls, kissing your forehead before withdrawing from you with the squelch-iest wet noise you’ve ever heard come from between your legs. It even grabs Joel’s attention and his eyes fall to your middle as he crawls out of bed. “Fuckin’ shop vac. It’s a vacuum. A wet one.” Joel smirks down at you. This makes you smile because you like when he compliments you. A lot. You love praise and being called a good girl and a princess and a fuckin’ filthy slut. You do love it. But… you still feel so uneasy with him right now. 

Joel walks into the bathroom, comes back with a cloth and is wiping himself down. Then he wipes you down while kissing your forehead. 

“You can come tomorrow. I was harsh. I like when you come with me.” Joel walks back into the bathroom before you can say anything. You’re left alone feeling frustrated and annoyed and horny still. High as fucking shit right now too. 

“Water. Please.” You croak out before he can leave the bathroom. He brings you back a glass and holds it out. His flaccid cock is still so god damned big- it's literally swinging between his legs. It’s still awe inducing even not throbbing. Joel sees you looking and covers it with one hand. 

“Always starin’ at it. You make me self conscious.” He teases as you take the water from him. 

“It’s fuckin’ perfect.” You say after taking a sip. “And all mine.” You flick your eyes up to him. “I mean it. Mine.” Joel smiles now, a big wide one and leans in. "That big dick is mine."

“That’s it baby. Claim me. What else?” You've awakened something within Joel. You can see it flash behind his eyes.

“I’ll knock that fuckin’ Ava bitch and you both the fuck out if I ever find out something happened or happens between you two. Understand me?” You lean in and kiss his lips. He nods. Big happy nods of understanding. “Good. Get into bed with me.” You demand it from him. 

“Jesus H Christ. Who the fuck is this? I love her! God damn,” He crawls into bed excitedly and pulls you into him after you set the water on the night stand. “I’m all turned on again. Keep going.” Joel is giggling. Like a little kid. It makes you laugh and sink down into the mattress with him. 

“Nothin’ happened while I was in the hospital, right? Between you and Ava?” Joel gives you a look of shock. 

“Baby. I would never. I promise. I’m not that kinda guy. You’re my ol’lady. You and you alone.” He kisses your lips softly. This eases fears and worries in your heart. “I’m yours and only yours.” Joel lays you back down onto the bed with him. “What’ll calm your mind, Birdie?” He whispers softly.

“I’m fine. I mean it. Just a lil jealous.” You whisper against his parted lips. “Mine.” You nip at his bottom lip and now he smiles. 

“Soon as you’re good enough to walk…” He whispers. You give him a confused look. He says nothing and just smiles.

What does that mean? He’s going to fuck you into oblivion? Fine with you. He doesn't respond. 

Joel holds you close to him until the both of you fall asleep.

You sit with Ellie in the kitchen, helping her with her math homework. She’s stuck and you are no help to her. It’s the worst. Joel comes in with more of Ava’s bread and her nasty jam. It’s not nasty it’s good but you dislike Ava. You watch as Joel helps her much more easily than you could and it makes you feel dumb. You should know these things like Joel does but your education was stolen from you and these things you had barely learned were pushed out of your head with things like how to shoot and how to skin animals and how to know what direction you’re going in without a compass. 

Joel kisses Ellie's forehead when she’s done and you all sit at the table and look at each other quietly. 

“There’s a boy at school. Real fuckin’ dick.” Ellie says over a mouthful of bread. It makes both Joel and yourself chuckle. 

“What’s he do?” You ask, taking a bite of your own bread. She shakes her head and sighs. 

“Trips me in the halls. Calls me Smelly Ellie. He likes the girl I like.” She rolls her eyes and this makes you hold back a smirk. “Jerk-off.” Now you laugh.

“How do you know he doesn’t like you?” Joel asks and you wrinkle your nose.

“Ew. No. Boys or girls who like you, Ellie, will not be mean to you. They might tease you a lil, try and make you smile! It wont be mean! And they won’t call you names…” You look at Ellie and she’s hanging on your words. “..they’ll be nice to you. Call you sweet things and make you feel good. Don’t let mean people trick you into thinking they’re nice.” Your eyes flick up to Joel’s, he’s looking right at you. Big dark eyes staring right into yours like he had been waiting for you to look at him. You look back to Ellie quickly. “You’ll know when someone likes you, babe.” You reach out and rub your hand against hers. 

Bedtime. 

Life is boring when you can’t fuckin’ do shit. Jesus. Can’t leave the house. Can’t walk up or down the stairs yet. Boring. 

Joel hands you a joint. You shake your head from side to side. 

“I don’t know. I feel weird when I’m high.” You look up at him but he urges you to take it. This makes you feel uneasy again. Why does he want you to be high so badly. 

“Baby, it’s gonna help. It’s been helpin’ right? He gives you sympathetic eyes. 

“I have weird dreams and I don’t think straight when I smoke that. Or eat those brownies.” You look up at him, trying to make him put it away with your eyes. He does not. He lights it, puffs on it twice and hands it to you. 

“Smoke it, baby. You get so giggly. It helps. You're so fun, too.” You take it from him as he speaks, looking at him caution in your eyes. “Stop lookin’ at me like that. Smoke it.” Joel nods his chin up at you. You hit it a couple times and hand it back to him. “Good girl.” It makes your stomach flutter when he calls you that. 

“You gonna make me laugh tonight?” You look up at him and suck on your bottom lip gently. He nods at you slowly as he puffs on the joint with you. “Oh yeah? Mr. Big Carpenter guy has jokes?” He smirks at you and passes the joint back. 

“Whatever it takes to make you laugh the way you did when I whooped your ass that one night. Cryin, snortin’ or whatever that sound was.” Joel chuckles at the memory. You laugh too now because you remember him sounding so downtrodden in the dark that he didn’t make you come. Then he whooped you with an old TV cable, and you liked it, dirty birdie. “C’mon. Get up.” Joel helps you out of bed. He stands in front of you and holds one of your hands up in his, near both of yours shoulders and the other on your waist. “Put’it up here.” Joel elbows your limp lazy hand at your side and nods to his shoulder. You do and then he sways you gently from side to side. 

Joel is slow dancing with you in your bedroom and it’s so fucking cute. Who is this man? 

“You wanted to dance with me?” You ask softly, looking up at him. His eyebrows flick up once and he nods, pressing his lips to your forehead. You never got to slow dance with anyone. You hadn't gone to prom yet. Hadn't been to a single school dance because your dad always said no. Now Joel was fulfilling a long lost dream of yours.

“Sure did, sweetness. Love being close to you.” Joel makes sure to not sway you to far on your bad leg but he does that and slowly, very slowly moves you around the bedroom. Sometimes he hums to you, other times he’s just kissing you gently. “I’m gonna marry you.” He whispers gently in between kisses. “I will.” Joel dances you slowly back to bed as you stare up at him with hooded, bloodshot eyes again.

“Really?” It’s been several minutes since he said that and he had since taken off his clothes except for his boxers and crawled into bed next to you. Joel nods and sighs softly. 

“Unless you don’t wanna. I want to. I want to marry you. Give you my last name. Give Ellie my last name if she wants it. Be a family. A real one. You can give her a sibling or two. Stay here forever with me?” Joel looks over at you with big, brown eyes and a small smile. You nod at him sleepily. 

“Yes. Forever.” You whisper up to him as he now rolls onto his side to look down at you. 

“You’ll be mine…forever?” He whispers softly. You nod up at him. He raises his eyebrow and gives you a knowing look. “You know better than that, Princess. Use your words.” 

“I’ll be yours. Forever, Daddy.” You look up at him and now Joel is the one sucking on his bottom lip; the words you just said gave him some sort of satisfaction. He loved it. He leans down and whispers in your ear. It tickles and makes you giggle in your influenced state. You feel weightless right now and his words do nothing to help that dizzy feeling inside of you.

“I love you, baby girl.” 

“I love you too, Daddy.” 

What the fuck happened last night? It definitely was not a dream. Not at all. It felt like one though. You’re up before Joel again and everything inside of you is telling him to wake his ass up and talk about what happened because you two just officially started dating. You thought you’d do that for a while before he proposed! And then you guys had sex! It was good sex but…you didn’t have sex. That part was a dream. For sure. You were on punishment. Who knows? You’re too worried about Joel proposing to also worry about dreams you have when you’re higher than the fucking Eifflel Tower! If that’s even what he did last night–propose! You don’t fucking remember! This is so scary. What the fuck is going on? You purposefully stir next to Joel with some oomph so he wakes up. It works.

“Mornin’.” He grumbles. His deep sleep filled voice gives you butterflies. You forgot what you were going to say. “Pretty.” He murmurs before closing his eyes again and touching your belly gently. His tongue touched just behind his slightly parted lips and now all you want to do is kiss him but you don’t! You remember why you woke him up.

“Did you propose to me last night?” You’re eyeing him suspiciously. Joel’s eyes snap open and they look at you curiously. 

“More– more like a promise. I don’t even— we didn’t— You don’t got a ring on your finger yet. Slow down.” Joel takes his rough calloused hand and tries to closes your eyes gently and pushes your head back to the pillows. “Go back to bed. Damn. Actin’ like we still gotta run somewhere. Where we runnin’ to? Back to bed. That’s where. Close your damn eyes, woman.” He grumbles into your ear sleepily.

A huge sigh of relief comes over you because yes. That was fine. A promise. You could make promises. You can keep a promise too. 

Your leg healed a lot while you were in a coma. It wasn’t a serious gunshot wound. It didn’t hit any bones or any major arteries. It did go deep into your muscle though and the doctors and nurses had taken it out. The stitches came out while you were unconscious. Now, you just have to get your body back to the way it was before. 

Within three days you were up, limping around the house with Joel when he was home. It was wet and rainy today so he was off and following you around with his hands on your ass. Being silly. Sweet. Goofy. It was fun. He was so different now than he was before and out on the road. 

“Cheeks for fuckin’ days. Lemme put my face between ‘em. C’mon, lean right on the counter.” Joel teases as he grips your ass in his hands and jiggles it gently. He hasn’t touched it in almost seven weeks. He missed it. 

“Leave me alone you horny animal. Are you in rut?” You chuckle at him as you do some dishes. It felt good to get back to the normal flow of a regular life. Dinner was on the woodstove. You cooked today and wanted to have food almost ready for when Ellie got home from studying with her friends. 

“For you? Yes.” He leans in and kisses your shoulder gently through your sweater. “Only you.” Now he presses his hips against yours from the back. “Love giving you this hard cock.” 

“Joel!” You swat him away from you. You are sore. You had wanted to wait a couple days to get your leg back in normal, working order but he couldn’t wait. You kinda couldn’t wait either. Things just happened. Almost every night except your first night home from the hospital when you ate that brownie and the other night when you slow danced.

“Okay! I’m sorry I can’t help it. You’re too fuckin’ sexy and I missed you .” He coos the last part into your ear. It makes you shiver. 

“Missed me. Ha! You’ve had me almost every night, Mister.” You push your hips back against his gently but his hands shoot to your waist and hold you there. He grinds against you, up and down, roughly. You can feel his length through his jeans and he’s exhaling so hard through his nose every time he moves his hips like it feels so good. 

The front door opens and you both hear Ellie’s heavy, running footsteps into the kitchen. You have never seen Joel move so fast out of a room in your life. He’s down the hallway before Ellie can run in and see him in his aroused state. You both hear the bathroom door close loudly from down the hall. You chuckle.

“He must’a had to go real bad. I heard him running to the bathroom. Jeez.” Ellie hugs you tight. Not a day has gone by since you’ve been home that she doesn’t hug you first thing when she gets home from school. In the mornings…different story. She’s grumpy. You give her breakfast and talk to her as little as you can because she’s frightening. Not fun. 

“Yeah he was just telling me how bad he had to go.” You lie and kiss the top of her head. “Missed you at school. Glad tomorrow is Saturday. We can walk around town together if it’s not too wet.” She looks up at you, arms still around your waist and nods happily. 

“Yes please. Yes. Yes. I want to show you all the cool stuff and where me and my friends have been hanging out and everything!” She is so excited. And literally the most perfect child. You and Joel did the right thing. You’re so glad you didn’t go back to Jackson after the argument with Joel in the driveway after she had been taken. 

“I love you.” It comes out of your mouth before you can stop it. Her arms drop and she looks at you with wide eyes. “I’m sorry. I didn’t m—” Before you can finish she hugs you tighter, squeezes you and presses her head into your shoulder. She doesn’t say it back. That’s okay. But you’re glad she knows how much you care for her. Almost died for her, would have– easily. 

“You’re the best. I’m glad Joel brought you with us. I wasn’t at first but…I’m glad you came. Glad you said yes to him.” She looks up at you now, with her own big brown eyes and smiles. “I really am. You’re gonna make a great mom.” Her smile softens drastically but it’s still there and she hugs you tight, resting her head on your shoulder again. 

You are speechless. You just hold her one arm against your waist and smile. 

“I have homework to do. Do you think you could help me?” She asks as she pulls away from you. You’re now peeling potatoes into the sink for dinner. 

“Can you ask Joel when he comes out of the bathroom? Go wash. Change. Stop stinkin’ the place up and maybe we can all work on it together before dinner is done.” She nods and runs upstairs with her book bag. 

Joel comes out of the bathroom a couple minutes later and checks if the coast is clear. 

“Wanna know what I did just now?” Joel whispers into your ear, his tongue teases your earlobe when he's finished speaking. You look over your shoulder at him with an eyebrow raised. 

“I don’t know…do I?” You ask with a lip curled in distaste. Joel nods at you slowly. “Okay. Tell me. Weirdo.” 

“I sucked on a pair of ya' panties and jerked off into another pair. Covered them in my fuckin’ come. You taste so fucking good, lil' girl.” He growls it lowly into your ear and you drop the potato you have in your hand. 

“You sucked on my panties?” You blink at him. He nods and does the little flick of his eyebrow. His tongue dances slowly behind his lips. You fucking love when he does that. You can see just the tip of it behind his teeth and his slightly parted mouth. Fuck. Joel is so hot. You do kiss him now, quickly. 

“Do you like that?” He gives you his big beautiful, brown eyed look he’s so fucking good at. You do like it. It made your fucking pussy twinge when he said that. Unsure as to why it turns you on so much. You nod. 

“Next time jerk off into the panties I have on. Make me wear it.” You said it like it’s a challenge for him. Joel nearly falls over. Actually has to grab onto the counter and hold onto it because his knees buckle. “Are you okay, old man? What happened?” You tease him. 

“Jesus fuckin’ Christ. That’s so hot. I’m gon' pass away.” Joel covers his eyes with the hand that isn’t supporting him. He makes you laugh. A real laugh and you like that. “Yer' bad. A real bad girl.” 

“What’d she do?” Ellie asks, her once loud footsteps are now silent because she doesn’t have her big clunky shoes on. Joel’s head whips to her and he points with his index finger. She gets ready to run.

“She’s bein’ too nice to you. That’s what. Where’s your homework?” Ellie takes off and Joel takes off after her, quickly. It makes your apron sway in the gust of wind he created when he ran away. She took off back up the stairs. Joel followed, he took the stairs two at a time behind her. “Jesus Ellie, it’s fuckin' disgusting up here. We’ve been here for two months. How did it get so messy? Where did y'even get all these clothes? Whose stuff is this?”

It’s all muffled because they’re upstairs but you hear his dismayed voice at her messiness. Neither one of you goes upstairs. There isn't a reason to. But now you’ll have to start checking. 

“Bring all your dirty laundry down! I’ll wash it all tomorrow!” You shout at them from your place at the sink. You throw all your taters in a pot and add water. Mashed potatoes, stew and bread. Perfect. You bake bread now. Ava can eat her bread and your family will eat your bread, thankyouverymuch,Ava.” 

Ellie runs back downstairs with Joel right behind her. 

“Stop! Stop! Stop!” She laughs as she runs and tucks herself into the corner of the counter beside you. Joel places either hand on the counter beside her. 

“Y'stop running...I’ll stop chasing.” He quickly grabs at her side to tickle her and she flinches and scream softly. “Stop screamin’.” He does it on her other side. She laughs so hard and fights him off. “It’s not that funny.” Now he gets her on both sides and she’s nearly on the floor with laughter. 

“He’s ticklish too, ya know.” You whisper down to Ellie over her laughter. Joel shoots you a narrowed eye look and Ellie’s hands move to his side with more speed than you could ever imagine and now Joel is the one giggling, trying to fight off her quick little hands. 

“He– hey. Sto– Ellie. Stop.” Joel is laughing like you’ve never heard him laugh before and this is everything you could have ever imagined your life to be. Perfect. Laughter in the house. Food on the stove. Happy family to wake up to every morning. What are you so scared of?

Ellie and you walk arm in arm around town slowly. She knows everyone. They’re all so nice. It’s so weird. You hate it. You’re used to people trying to kill you. Makes you uneasy at everyones niceness. Ellie shows you all the things– it’s not much but it does resemble a town– a movie theater, a jail, a town hall. There is her school, the house of worship and you knew the medical center already. This was nice. The town hall was new and there wasn’t anything inside of it. No mayor would be elected. Just there in case meetings or other important events needed to take place, there would be a spot for it. 

“That's her house.” Ellie whispers softly as you pass a light blue house with two stories. It looks exactly like yours but your house is dark gray. You love it. It’s like storm clouds. Thunder. “Her name is Dina.” She whispers so low that you have to strain to hear her actual name. You don’t even really hear it but you know better than to ask right in front of her house. 

Ellie had to bring you that way to get back home. Everything in a giant circle basically and so she just took you around the whole colony. This was just a convenient trip to her loves home. A desperate attempt at a glimpse or maybe even a hello if Dina had been outside. But she hadn’t been and Ellie didn't see her. 

“You’ll see her Monday.” You whisper, well enough distance to be out of earshot but you still whisper, just in case. “Have you walked her home yet?” You don’t whisper this part and Ellie nearly dies right on the sidewalk. Hands on your arm and she almost falls down dramatically.

“Oh my God. Stop. Don’t talk so loud.” She’s red in the face and looking around to see if anyone is outside. “She lives right there, oh my God.” You could tell she could pass away from embarrassment right now. “No. I get too nervous every time I try.” She whispers harshly at you. 

“Okokokok. Sorry. I thought we were far enough away.” You wrap your arm around her neck. It’s just you and her today. Joel is working on getting your backyard ready. Cleaning up bullshit that had been in the house before, fixing the deck. Building a fire pit. Making the house a real home. 

“Did you mean what you said yesterday?” Ellie looks up at you and her eyes scan your face as you nod down to her. “Why?” You have to think about what to tell her… not what but how. It takes you a minute as you look down at the sidewalk below your feet. Her eyes never leave the side of your face. 

“This is gonna be weird. Kinda hard for me maybe, okay?” She nods up at you, eyes softening tremendously as they look into yours. “I’ve always wanted a kid of my own. I thought that opportunity got taken away from me when this outbreak happened. I never thought…I never expected to have a child dropped into my lap when I least expected it.” You smile now while she listens, the corners of her mouth turning up slightly. “I know that I am not your mom. I’ll never try to be, unless you want me to. But I’m excited that I get to watch you grow. That I get to help you. Protect you. I didn’t know if I’d get the chance when Joel was trying to get us out of that hospital. If I ever do have my own kid someday, you’ll always be my first baby.” You lean down and kiss her on the top of the head with a loud smack. “Always.” You kiss the top of her head ten million times and she’s laughing. 

“I like it. I like that you–you know…wanna…take care of me.” She looks up at you now with her big brown eyes that look like Joel’s somehow. “I didn’t get taken care of before this. Just raised. Barely.” Ellie’s voice is steady and she’s confident in herself. You’re a mess. About to sob and fall down on the sidewalk and roll around crying because you love her so much. “You and Joel are good at it." She hesitates for a moment and then speaks again, quietly. "This is what a family feels like?” She asks, so innocently and so genuinely that it actually hurts your heart. She doesn’t know or have anything to compare it to. 

“I think so. My family wasn’t like this.” You both stop walking and she looks up at you with confusion in her big brown eyes. “My dad was an asshole. Mean. Nasty. Spoke badly to me and my mom and sister. He didn’t respect us.” Ellie’s eyes are sad now. Big and sad. 

“Why?” She asks curiously. You shrug.

“I dunno. Just was. Always was. I was scared to come home from school most days, cause I didn’t wanna get screamed at for nothin’.” You start walking her back towards home. “I’m telling you this because I don’t ever want you to take Joel for granted. He and I are always just trying to keep you safe. Don’t ever hate us for that, okay?” She nods up at you but you don’t know if she really understands. Having parents isn’t always fun. 

When you get home Joel is waiting for you guys but he wants to talk to you. You can tell. It’s written all over his face. 

“My girls.” Joel smiles through his worried eyes and slaps Ellie up like they’re best friends. You shake your head. “It’s Saturday. Chores. Make lunch. Then we’ll eat and you can go do whatever it is you do up in your room. Clean it this time , maybe. Something.” Joel pushes her into the kitchen. “I gotta take Bird for another walk. We’ll be back.” 

“My leg aches.” You whine once you get outside. You didn’t wanna fight with him inside in front of Ellie, because he was basically waiting for you at the door. 

“I know, baby. I know. I brought this for us.” Joel holds a joint up and lights it as you walk towards the driveway and back down to the sidewalk. Joel puffs on the joint for a while and you watch him from the corner of your eye.

“So you just smoke my medicine like it’s recreational?” You tease, you don’t really mind. It’s a fun thing you do together; that makes you fearful of him and also paranoid and you forgot how to swallow and breathe that one time, but it’s fun. 

“Here, baby.” Joel holds the joint to your lips so you can keep your hands in your pockets. You puff twice, too big, cough and choke for a minute. You have to stop and bend at the waist and you almost throw up. “Ok. Not that much. Cheech and Chong over here.” He laughs as he pats your back. 

“I’m Cheech Marin. I’m one hundred percent Cheech.” You wheeze and pant as you stand up straight. Joel belly laughs when you say this. You look up at him red-faced and teary eyed.

“Sure are, babe.” You walk like that until you get to the park just outside of the medical center. It’s just a small playground but there is a bench and you guys sit. “What’d you and Ellie talk about today?” He asks nervously. You give him a suspicious look. 

“Why? You don’t want her to tell me something?” You take the joint from Joel and hit it very carefully because your lungs feel like raisins. Joel is hiding something. What is it?

“Did she ask you about what happened at the hospital? Do you even remember? ” He asks, taking your free hand. You nod slowly. Neither one of you talked about it at all yet. “I didn’t tell her the truth.” Joel tells you this freely. 

“Why? Why didn’t you tell her that Marlene did that to her?” You get a little angry but you kinda think you know where Joel is coming from. “Ugh. Nevermind. I know. What did you tell her?” 

“They did the tests. Those doctors stopped looking for a cure.” Joel gives you big brown eyes again. Always. “I said raiders attacked. I told her Marlene didn’t make it.” 

“Did she make it? I don’t…” You trail off because you had basically already lost almost all of the blood inside of you at that point. The whole elevator ride down to the parking garage was a little fuzzy and gray. Hard to remember exactly what was said and what happened. Joel shakes his head. 

“I told Ellie that the raiders got Marlene.” Joel whispers softly. “I killed her, though. I was going to let her go but then she went for the car. She went for you and Ellie. I shot her.” Joel sighs it out like he had been needing to tell someone. You press your free hand to the side of his face. The joint has gone out. Neither one of you need anymore. Looking at each other with red, squinting eyes. In public! “I told her that there were a lot more people like her. That they didn’t need her anymore so we could all go home.” 

“And that’s what you want me to tell her if she ever asks?” You look into those big eyes and get lost in them. 

“That. You could say you don’t remember. I just don’t want her to hate us for taking away her choice.” Joel looks like he could cry.

“We gave her a choice, Joel. I told her what could happen, in front of the RV that day you found the game. I warned her of what might happen. She had a choice and she made it. Those doctors lied to her. We didn’t lie. I understand why you did and I respect you and I won’t tell her but don’t feel guilty, baby. You did the right thing. We did the right thing.” Joel nods his head quickly and leans into your hand.

“Thank you. I didn’t even think of it until you and her went off on your own today. I thought for sure she was going to pry you for info.” Joel smiles know. 

“Can I ask you something?” You’re nervous. You’re going to tell Joel about your paranoia and fears and it’s making your legs shiver and tense up. 

“Anything.” 

“Why do you treat me like that…in the bedroom? You’re so… aggressive all the time. You speak down to me. Even at the table the other day you said I was below you.” You speak fast because you’re scared. Holy shit you’re so scared. Joel’s eyes haven’t left yours. “It makes me nervous. It makes me feel like… your property. I’m supposed to be your girlfriend. ” 

Joel’s eyes soften immediately and he holds your face in his hands now. 

“I thought… I thought you liked that?” Joel looks at you confused. “We haven’t done anything we didn’t do back in the cabin besides the dirty talk. We did that too, it’s just different.” Joel shrugs his shoulders.

“And the being below you comment? The punishment ?” You’re confused. Just as confused as he is, apparently. 

“Did you not like being punished? On the road? I thought that was like, something we’re exploring.” Joel has his hand on your good leg and is squeezing gently. “I don’t understand. When I told you I would be gentle with you, you basically told me to scram.” Joel chuckles nervously. 

What the shit? Is he right? 

“What about my dream the other night? I don’t think it was a high brownie dream…I think you fucked me. Without my permission.” 

“You gave me permission ten thousand times! I asked so many times!” Joel exclaims, holding both hands out to you like he’s showing you off to someone who isn’t there. “Then you wake up talkin’ about it’s a dream and start callin’ me daddy again—”

“I didn’t call you daddy. I said in my dream you told me to call you daddy–” You’re leering at him and he’s leering right back at you.

“You called me that shit first! I didn’t like it the first time you said it but you kept moaning it over and over and I got rock fuckin’ hard eatin’ your pussy while you called me daddy. I was ashamed !” Joel is mad at you now. “You’re right. You shouldn’t smoke anymore weed. Accusing me of what— raping you?” Joel stands up from the bench. “I like it rough. I like to dominate the hell out of you and talk real dirty to you in the bedroom. I’d never do that , though, Jesus. If I thought you didn’t want it I’d never take it from you—get outta here.” Joel waves his hand at you dismissively. 

“The below you comment?” You’re unwavering, even with his behavior. Joel snorts and shoves his hands into his jacket pocket. 

“I’m sorry. I was an ass for that. I’m hot headed sometimes.” Joel kicks at the ground with his boot. “Shit, s’why I was a single dad.” Joel’s eyes meet yours for a moment but then he looks away. “I am sorry. I get carried away.” 

“I didn’t like it. I’ve been terrified at night because I don’t know what’s real and what’s a dream. That comment didn’t ease any anxiety I had.” You huff softly when you’re done talking because now you are confused if this is all something your weird, blood denied and weed filled brain came up with. You do not know.

“Terrified? Of me? Like I’m the boogie man?” Joel kicks at the ground again. “I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to scare you or hurt you. Nothin’ like that.” Joel walks back to you now and sits where he had been before. “Don’t want you scared of me. Ever. I wanna be your husband one day. Not someone you think you’re forced to be with. If you think that, tell me.” 

“I don’t feel forced. I just want you to respect me. Treat me good. I think I just had time before, when we didn’t see each other in between— but when someone calls you stupid and a slut every fucking day even if it’s sexy…I don’t know. Maybe I’m starting to believe I’m only good for one thing.” Words you didn’t even know to be true are coming out of your mouth but those words sounded productive to your stoned ears. 

“Bird. Look’it me.” Joel’s stern voice pulls your eyes from the grass in front of you. He’s staring at you. “ Smartest , most incredibly strong woman I ever met. I mean it. You blew me away on the road. Every single day. You still do.” Joel grabs both of your hands in his. “Ellie made me want to be a parent again. You make me wanna have another baby. I want a family with both of you and being safe here, in Jackson— it just makes sense.” Joel squeezes your hands now. “I see Tommy and Maria getting their house ready for their kid and, I dunno. There is that extra bedroom upstairs .” 

You want kids. You want ‘em bad. You’ve been thinking about it since Joel said it at the table that same day he said you were below him. Neither of those things have left your brain. 

“You’re serious?” You ask him, dropping your eyes to your lap because this sucks. Your brain is still telling you something is not right. “I’d wanna wait.”

“Lil’ late for that, Bird. We been tryin’ since basically you got home. Started on the road, really. Stopped thinking with my big brain.” Joel taps his head with his finger. Your heart starts to race in your chest because he is not wrong. He’s come inside you almost everyday. 

“Stop. Don’t do it again until I’m really ready. I don’t think it’ll take me long. I jus— I need to wrap my head around that.” You’re sweating even in the cool spring air. “I mean it. Pull out for a while.” You’re looking up at Joel now and he must see the fear in your eyes because he pulls you in for a big hug. A good hug. It makes you feel safe.

“Whatever you need, Bird. I’ll do anything to make you happy. I mean it.” 

Joel walks home with you hand in hand, right past Ava’s house so if she is home and watching get a good look, lady! He’s taken! Him and his big ole weiner! You don’t know why you’re so nervous about Ava. She just gives him bread and jam. Soon you’ll know how to make jam too and you and Joel and Ellie will need nothing from her but her schooling. That’s it. 

Ellie had cleaned the house a little and made sandwiches for lunch. Which were actually not bad. You liked that they had fresh meat and veggies at the little market down in the town. Joel picked up some turkey there and it’s actually better than you ever remember turkey being. 

“Do you pay for any of this stuff? How do you even do that?” You look at Joel after taking a bite of your sandwich. He shakes his head. 

“It’s all communal. Everyone gets a share of everything unless they don’t want it.” Joel starts to explain and Ellie pipes in.

“Like Miss. Ava is a vegetarian so she gave her share to him this week.” Ellie nods her head at Joel. You raise an eyebrow at Ellie and do not meet Joel’s staring eyes. They’re boring holes in the side of your face. 

“How nice of Miss. Ava.” You go back to your sandwich and look out the window. The ceiling is so nice. And so is this beautiful table. Wow. Holy smokes, the floors are incredible. Joel clears his throat but you still don’t look at him. You look at Ellie again and admire her cheek bones and nice nose. Joel clears his throat again, louder and Ellie looks at him, sees him staring at you and then looks at you, staring at her. 

“What is going on?” She asks innocently. You shake your head and look down at your plate.

“Nothing. I was just thinkin’ about how pretty you are.” You smile, looking up at her again. “Do you have a lot of kids at your school?” You ask curiously, you never have asked before.

“There are thirteen of us teenagers. The oldest is seventeen. The youngest is twelve. There are a lot of younger kids though. Younger than ten I think. They’re on a different level of the school.” You’re so interested. You can see Joel still looking at you out of the corner of your eye. 

“Do you guys all ever see each other or do they keep you separate all day? You know, from the littler kids.” Ellie nods as she swallows a bite of her sandwich. 

“We all get lunch at the same time. The little kids are pretty cute. ‘Cept when they cry. Then they’re annoying.” She takes another bite. 

You do look at Joel now and he’s got his big brown eyes on the apology setting. You eat the rest of your lunch in silence and when everyone is done Ellie clears the table and brings everything into the kitchen and washes up. Joel leans in and puts his elbows on the table. 

“It’s not whatever you’re thinkin’.” Joel whispers. You shrug. 

“Does she even know about me?” You ask just as quietly as he had spoken. Joel nods enthusiastically. 

“Of course. We talk about you all the time.” He motions to himself and Ellie in the kitchen. “Stop bein’ jealous. Ain’t nothin’ to be jealous of. I’m yours, baby. All of me. I promise.” Joel gets up from his chair and walks to you at the other end, kissing the top of your head. “Do you wanna get out of the house again? We can go do something? Go to the bar?” Joel grips your chin and makes you look up at him. You shake your head no.

“I’m tired. Leg hurts. I think I need a nap.” Joel leans down and kisses your lips when you’re done speaking. 

“Do you want to take a cold shower together— a gentle one– and then we can nap?” Joel looks down into your eyes as he rests his forehead on yours. “A nice one. I’ll wash you. Kiss you real nice. Won’t touch you funny or nothing. Just be gentle.” The words are whispered against your lips and you do want a cold shower with Joel. Real bad. A gentle one.

You stand up as he’s kissing you and his tongue teases your bottom lip as he pulls away. Joel’s hand finds yours and he’s gently pulling you into the kitchen, he calls to Ellie as she finishes the dishes. 

“Hey, she’s gonna nap. I’m showering. Prolly gonna nap too. Stay home.You can go with your friends tomorrow, okay?” Joel pauses with you at his side. Ellie nods and wipes her hands on her jeans. “Maybe go clean your room.” Joel eyes her and points a finger. Ellie rolls her eyes and heads upstairs. Joel watches, making sure she goes up there and once her door shuts, Joel leads you to the bedroom and into your attached bathroom.

“I love you.” Joel’s whispering against your lips as he unbuttons the flannel shirt you have on. “I do. It breaks my heart that you’re scared of me.” He pushes the shirt off your shoulders and down your arms. “Don’t be scared, baby girl.” His hands are working on the buttons of your jeans and he's pushing them down your thighs carefully. “My lil bird, scared. Frightened.” He’s kissing you while speaking, desperately . Gently, yes. But it’s like he cannot get enough of you.

You lean against the wall as Joel undresses quickly in front of you, unbuttoning his own flannel shirt quickly. You watch but you’re getting nervous for the shower. It’s so cold but when he pushes his pants down and he swings freely between his legs you forget all fears of the shower and wonder how he gets that thing inside of you. 

“Starin’ at it!” Joel covers it with one hand. “Stop it.” He holds the other hand over what the first hand doesn’t cover. 

“How can I not! Look’it the thing. Jesus. It’s huge.” You have never really seen Joel’s flaccid dick this much before. It was always hard and big, yes, but it’s big when it’s soft too! What the hell!? “That thing really does make me stupid, holy shit.” You give him a big, stupid smile and he laughs at you and kisses your forehead.

“I don’t think you're stupid. I don’t. Really.” Joel feels bad. You can hear it in his voice. 

“Hey, I like it. Sometimes. Every four days I like it. Everyday is too much. I’m sorry.” You look up at him as he starts the shower. 

“Don’t be sorry, Bird.” He steps in immediately because it’s not going to warm up. Joel doesn’t even react. “I’m sorry. We should have talked more. I’m just aggressive. With everything. ‘Specially you. I’ll be better.” Joel holds his hand out for you to take so he can help you in. 

Joel holds you under the cold water, despite your giggling protests so that you can get used to it. He giggles with you and kisses your lips softly as the water stops being freezing and just is cold now. Once nice and wet, Joel wraps his arms around you and pulls you close to him.

“Sorry for accusing you of anything. My brain’s been all foggy. Weird this last week.” You apologize to his chest because you do feel bad. This good man wouldn’t hurt you. You can tell in his touches. 

“Bird, stop apologizing. I never should have assumed you were good to sleep with when you were high. I fucked up. That was wrong of me and I won’t do it again. I won’t do nothin’ you don’t wanna do, okay baby girl?” 

Joel plants gentle kisses across your collarbones and shoulders. He turns you and kisses every inch of your back. Doesn’t miss a spot as his hands move up and down your sides and front as he does it. His hands and lips never stray past your waist or to your chest. His tongue dips out and tastes your skin sometimes, and his warm breath is inviting on your cool flesh. You rest your forehead on the wall of the shower as he kisses across the small of your back. His hands grip your lower stomach gently like he worships the little extra flesh you carry there. He does. He holds onto it and pushes you back against his mouth as he kisses and nips up your spine. 

“You’re so pretty, baby.” He whispers in your ear as he stands up behind you. You can feel his erection pressed into you from behind but he doesn’t try or do anything with it. It’s just pressed against your ass as he grabs a bar of soap. He washes you gently. So carefully. Joel washes your hair and kisses along your neck after he rinses you. “I’m so sorry.” He whispers into your ear. “So sorry.” His deep voice travels slowly in your ear canal as he shuts the water off. “C’mon. Let’s go nap, tired bird.” Joel dries you off and gets you into a long t-shirt to sleep in. 

“I’m sorry. I feel like I made a big deal out of nothing.” You whisper into his chest as he wraps you up in his arms. “I love you, too. I do. You’re very good to me. You took good care of me. Saved my life.” You’re teeth are chittering because you’re so cold but he presses his already warm body against yours tightly, feelings your body shivering against his. 

“It is a big deal. Your happiness and your safety are my biggest concerns. If you don’t feel neither of those things then I’m doin’ something wrong.” Joel sighs and rests his chin on the top of your head. “I’m bad at this. Bein’ a boyfriend. A husband. Been single for so fuckin’ long.” He sighs again and runs his fingers across your back. “I’ll be better. I’ll try. Talk to me though. You ain’t got nothin’ to be scared of.” 

Joel’s words and his calming touches do make you feel better. A lot better. 

“Okay.” You whisper sleepily. 

“We’re goin’ to Tommy and Maria’s tonight for dinner and a fire outside. Rest up. We’ll have a good time. Get to show off my girlfriend. ” Joel yawns and pulls the blankets up over your shoulders. “I’m sorry again, baby. I love you.” 

Dinner was good. Maria is a good cook and Tommy knows how to smoke meats very well. The weather was cool but the big fire the four of you sat around was nice. Joel held your hand in his while drinking something Tommy had given him. You drank wine and Maria had water. She was close to giving birth soon. 

“Are you excited?” You ask, leaning over to talk to her while the brothers talked about buildings and things they needed for around town. She nods excitedly. 

“We just finished his room. Tommy went and found a crib that’s really nice. It’s so clean and perfect.” She rubs her belly gently and looks at Tommy who is sitting across the fire. “He’s going to be such a good dad.” 

“His room? How do you know it’s a boy?” You ask, a smile creeping onto your face as her own smile grows. She shrugs and cradles her unborn baby inside of her. 

“I don’t know for sure. I just hope it’s a boy– I’ll be happy either way, really. But I want a boy so bad. I wanna name him after my brother.” She looks sadly at the fire now right in front of her. “I lost him pretty early in the outbreak.” She looks over to you now and flushes the sadness from her eyes and smiles. 

“No kids of your own?” She asks, eyes flicking between you and Joel quickly. You shake your head. 

“Not yet. We been thinking about it since we came back, though.” You explain, taking a sip of your wine. Maria’s eyes light up. 

“You should! They could grow up together. It would be so nice to have another first time mom around.” She sounds excited but her eyes keep flicking between you and Joel. You look over your shoulder at him and he’s looking at you with a smile on his face, then he turns back to Tommy. 

“I want to. I think about it a lot.” You turn back to Maria who has turned her whole pregnant body towards you. You let go of Joel’s hand finally and turn to face her also. “I never thought I’d get to. It’s almost like my brain accepted that I wouldn’t have my own kids so now I can’t accept the fact that it’s an option now.” You try to explain the best you can but Maria is nodding and has her hand on your forearm.

“I know. I know exactly what you mean. Those two just want to…fuck. Spread their seed. A mother’s instinct runs so much deeper than just a need to procreate. I thought Tommy was so dumb for wanting to have a baby in a place like this.” She looks around their backyard. “But it’s so safe. It took me a while to warm up to the idea.” Her eyes soften as they look at you. “C’mon. I’ll take you to get more wine.” She grabs your hand and leads you into their house. 

It’s beautiful and nicely decorated. Maria keeps a clean home and it’s inspiring. 

“Thanks for having us over tonight. We’ll have you over as soon as our backyard is cleaned up. Joel works on it everyday.” You look out at him through the window above their sink. Joel is so fucking handsome. It literally pains you. He’s all yours, too. 

“He good to you?” Maria asks as she fills your wine glass. You honestly don’t need anymore but you feel too good to tell her to stop. 

“What do you mean?” You turn to eye her suspiciously and lean against the island she’s setting the wine bottle down on. 

“Is Joel good to you?” She’s serious. Much more serious than she had sounded outside. She had a tone of freaking wonder or something when she had been outside talking about babies and Tommy. Talking about Joel… she sounds…nervous? What the fuck?

“Yeah. He’s really good to me.” You look into her eyes and she’s moving them from you to the door that leads outside then back to you. “Why?” Now you’re fuckin’ nervous. What the actual fuck does she mean and why are her eyes doing that?

“Tommy has just told me some things. I worry for you and Ellie.” She leans on her elbows like you are. “He’s a dangerous guy.” You know this. You’ve seen him in action, but he’s not dangerous to you. No. He protects you. 

“Yeah. Gotta be out here, to survive. If he wasn’t dangerous I wouldn’t have made it back here alive.” You defend him because was Tommy not dangerous at one point either? Joel told you about what he and Tommy did. You’re not blind to his past. Not really, you don’t think. “Tommy should know all about being dangerous. Right?” Your eyes scan her face. 

“Tommy didn’t have an ex-wife who fled in the middle of the night to never be heard from ever again.” She whispers this. “Gone. In the wind. Didn’t call the kid. Didn’t come to visit.” This is all news to you. Joel had told you she left him, yes, but he didn’t tell you that she disappeared.

“He do something to her?” You ask nervously. Maria shakes her head. You let out a sigh of relief. 

“Tommy just said that Joel can be controlling. Domineering. Possessive.” She says the words slowly. “Tommy doesn’t think Joel would ever put his hands on a woman. But Joel did or said something to make his ex run away. Far away. So far she never wanted to talk to her kid again.” 

“Tommy told you that? That Joel did something?” You raise one eyebrow. Maria shakes her head from side to side again. 

“Just my assumption.” She shrugs her shoulders. “Could have been an affair too, who knows. Just weird she didn’t wanna see her daughter after. I can’t imagine not seeing him and I don’t even know him yet.” She leans back and rubs her stomach. “I just want you to be careful.” She looks down at you seriously. 

Maria! You are drunk and maybe still a little high from earlier! You had just gotten a lot of the fear and worry and doubt out of your heart and now you sleep next to a stranger again! Maria! Why!? You liked it better when you didn’t know any of that stuff and now you wish you could go back in time and politely decline her offer for more wine. You’re drinking it now too and it’s just going to make you more drunk. You set it down and push it away from you. 

“I shouldn’t. I still have to take my medicine tonight.” You’re fucking nervous now because you’ve only been drunk the one other time when you were fifteen and you’re legs feel like they have no bones in them. “And walk home.” You sigh. 

Joel and you say your goodbyes. Hugs and thank yous. We’ll do this again soon is said several times by all four of you. Joel grabs your hand and holds it tightly in his, interlacing his fingers into yours. 

“Did you have fun?” Joel looks down at you with his perfect brown eyes and you wanna sit on his face. You nod up at him. 

“I did. I like do– doing stuff like that.” You hiccup and wish you were home already. “I don’t wanna waaalk.” You whine as you guys get into the street. 

“Hop up.” Joel kneels in front of you and holds his arms out at his sides. “Your leg should be good? Doesn’t hurt to bad?” You’re stopped behind him because he wants you to what? Play leap frog with him? 

“What? You want me to jump over you?” You’re teetering to one side. “I can– barely stand up.” You almost fall and Joel has to jump up to catch you. “I’m drunk f’the first time in m-my adult life. I don’t—” Joel takes one of your hands and places it on his shoulder as he turns around. “I can’t jump over you!” You exclaim as he kneels again. 

“Will you climb onto my back? I’m gonna piggy back you home, Jesus Christ.” He chuckles as you place your knees on sides. He holds you and lifts. There is a small dull pain in your leg but it feels better than walking with no bones. 

“Weed and wine!” You exclaim as he carries you on his back. “I don’t like them, Joel Miller. I hate ‘em.” You rest your head on his shoulder. “What happened to your wife? Why did she leave you?” You slur against his jacket. Joel doesn’t stop walking. 

“Unhappy. I worked a lot. We fought when I was home. Real bad. Really bad.” Joel whispers as you listen, your head still resting against his shoulder. “She’d hit me sometimes. I’d call her terrible things. She left in the middle of the night. Never heard from her again until I got divorce papers in the mail.” Joel looks back at your sleepy, drunk eyes. “Why you askin’ now, babe?” 

“Been thinkin’ ‘bout it.” You lie through a whispered croak. “Don’t fight with me. Don— Don’t call me terrible things.” You continue to croak drunkenly. 

“Don’t hit me.” Joel teases softly. 

“Lemme ssspank you.” You close your eyes and he shifts you, lifting you up higher onto his back. You’re doing almost nothing to hold on besides the one shoulder you hold onto and the other you're resting on. Joel has to hunch to keep you up there. 

“You can spank me, hell yeah. Fuckin’ teach me a lesson, Bird. I was bad. I need to be punished.” Joel laughs as you guys make your way up your own driveway and into the house. Ellie is making a snack in the kitchen when you get in. 

“Oh no. She took too much medicine again?” She asks sarcastically. You think this is hilarious. Joel laughs too and shakes his head. 

“Nope. Just had too much fun at Uncle Tommy’s house with Maria.” Joel kicks his boots off in the doorway and leaves them on the porch. “Come shut this door for me, El. I gotta put her to bed. We’re both goin’ to bed. You should too. You’re making breakfast in the morning.” Joel carries you to Ellie. You and her smile at each other and exchange a soft forehead touch while you cling to his shoulders. 

“Love you, sssweet girl. G’night.” You sigh and rest your head on Joel’s shoulder again. 

“Night! Love you guys. See you in the morning.” Ellie takes off up the stairs. Joel stands in the kitchen, not moving. The door to her bedroom slams shut. 

“Did she just say she loves us?” Joel asks quietly. You nod sleepily against his shoulder. 

“Yeah. I think so. I might’a jus’ said it to her. I dunno.” You’re so tired. Your mouth feels like it’s got weights inside of it. It’s so hard to talk. Oh my, God what is happening. You need to be laying down. 

Joel gets you into bed and pulls your jeans off slowly. 

“C’mon. Lemme put a baby into you. You’re gonna look so fucking sexy with my kid inside you.” Joel growls playfully and kisses from your lower stomach up to your chest, pushing your shirt up as he does it. 

“I’d have a baby w– with you.” You hiccup again. You’re so drunk. 

“I’ll put one in you when you're sober, baby girl. Joel kisses between your breasts and up your neck as he pulls your shirt up over your head for you. “I want to. So fucking bad.” Joel continues to kiss up your neck and towards your ear as he tosses your shirt to the floor behind him. 

“Joel, do it.” You whisper up to him. He licks your jaw from your ear to your lips and he kisses you. 

“I’m Daddy in here still. One of the rules now.” Joel kisses you again and then kisses back down your jaw on the other side. 

“Daddy, please.” You want him inside of you so badly. The alcohol and his kisses have you wriggling underneath him.

“No.” Joel growls softly. “I’ll do it in the morning if you still feel the same.” He presses his erection against you through his jeans. “You feel how fuckin’ hard you make me? You feel how badly I want to? How bad I wanna claim that pussy forever. Cause you are mine. My baby, my sweet girl. Not below me. You’re right here with me, baby.” Joel’s whispering into your ear as he rocks his hips against your good thigh. 

“Fuck, Daddy.” You moan softly at his words and his erection against you. 

“Let’s go to bed.” Joel says suddenly. Your eyes shoot open. 

“I congress–I cosign– I c-c-consent! Daddy please.” You’re begging him, drunkenly. Joel shakes his head no and gets off the bed to turn the light off. 

“You’re drunk. I’m not. It feels weird now, after our talk in the park. C’mon. Let’s go to sleep.” 

“Okay yes. Drunk. But still horny now. Cosigning. I wanna.” You look up at Joel as he crawls over you. “Please.” You look into his eyes and he’s still shaking his head no. 

“Get yourself off. I’ll watch. I know you want it. I just can’t. Not tonight, babe.” Joel leans in and kisses you softly on the cheek, you pull away in frustration. “Awww, don’t be mad at me. Want me to suck those perfect fuckin’ tits while you touch yourself?” Joel offers some support in this whole denial of sex. 

“No. I want to fuck.” Now you’re mad. You just wanna go to bed. You turn over and roll the opposite way from him, facing the wall. Joel laughs from behind you and pulls you in close to him. 

“I wanna fuck you, too. ‘Nother rule is I don’t touch you while you’re intoxicated. Until you feel better about all of this at least.” Joel grinds himself into you from the back. “You feel that? It’s all yours, first thing in the morning if you still want it.” 

if there are any tags you think I should add let me know.

[inchidentally]

I saw your post about Lando and his teammates and I agree in pretty much everything. There's also some things I had never noticed before or at least, not as in depth, and as I was reading I remembered some moments I wanted to share with you. I checked videos for accuracy btw.

I kinda felt Daniel and Carlos liked the spotlight in them meanwhile Lando just avoided it, in fact he still does, and this affected his dynamic with Oscar positively. Some examples:

Austria 2020. Lando earns his first F1 podium. When they're in the team celebration Carlos runs to congratulate Lando and accompanies him to meet the team. Then he's the one who hands Lando the champagne and his trophy. At some point he punctuates something Lando says in his speech. Nothing bad-spirited of course, and maybe is just a Carlos way of protecting "socially-awkward" Lando in a big brother kind of way, but it's not Lando's decission to share his spotlight with Carlos, he can't make a choice here. Previously Carlos had shared his Brazil 2019 success with Lando making him a main point of his celebration, so probably it's just a "sharing good moments" mentality from Carlos' side, but again, nobody asked Lando.

Monza 2020. On the other hand Carlos almost wins the race, he ends up second and a bit frustrated, his first proper podium with Mclaren after the Brazil delayed podium. He gets to the garage for the celebration and Lando is waiting patiently on the side. He blends with the other team members until someone brings his neon board to show he finished P4 for the team photo. A podium if a red flag didn't screw him. I wonder how many people remember this fact, because I feel it wasn't mentioned enough back in the day.

2021 season: Daniel loves the spotlight until… his season is very bad and it's better if the spotlight is away from him. Lando has an outstanding season receiving his well-earned dose of attention until Monza happens. Daniel deserves all the attention for getting a victory. Everybody praises Mclaren, it's a 1-2! Fast-forward a week when Daniel and Lando make a Q&A video for the F1 channel and Daniel remembers it was Lando's best result in F1 and Lando uses his sarcastic humour saying "it's a shame you won because everybody forgot, you kinda ruined it." They joke about it. Coincidentally the rest of Lando's season is plagued by bad luck: the late rain in Sochi, the punctures in Brazil, Qatar and Abu Dhabi, and a terribly-timed pit-stop before a red flag in Saudi Arabia. In retrospect that 2nd position was Lando's highest point of the season and it went a bit unnoticed. Comments on how Lando "crumbles under pressure" or how he "disappears in the 2nd half of the season" are everywhere after the last race. Unfair and harsh.

And I see a reflection of all those things Lando went through in his current relationship with Oscar.

When Oscar misses the podium in Silverstone for an unlucky safety-car and finishes P4, Lando from his second step in the podium doesn't miss a chance remembering everyone that Oscar should had been P3. In his team radio, in the post-race interview, in the media pen, in the Mclaren video… He just got his first podium at his home race but he worries about the rookie and how frustrated he must feel, because well, he's been in that exact position before and nobody openly cared about it.

When they get a double podium in Japan it's Oscar's first podium in F1 and Lando does everything he can to make sure everybody knows about it. He showers him in champagne in the podium, kinda forgetting his own success. It's not a "double podium" more, it's "Oscar's first podium", thank you very much.

Then it's Qatar and Oscar wins the Sprint. Lando works hard for his P3 but he mentions Oscar's victory at any given chance. Even one day later when Lando does a brilliant run from P10 to P3 (and who knows if it could have been a P2 if Mclaren had allowed him to race Oscar) and as frustrated as he was with his whole weekend and the missed chances, he doesn't celebrates with Oscar, he celebrates Oscar.

Oscar gets unlucky in the second half of the season: accidents that aren't his fault, mechanical problems… Some people use his final positions to attack him saying that his rookie season isn't that impressive. Especially after the American races.

It's the end of the season and Lando often remembers all of Oscar's milestones even before Oscar can open his mouth, because Lando knows Oscar will avoid the spotlight. Lando knows how it feels like when you're treated with condescension for being the younger one but he can't do that, he sees Oscar as an equal. Someone who has worked as hard as him to get to the top, someone who deserves his success as much as himself, someone who maybe doesn't care at all about spotlights and attention and can't understand why his older teammate insists so much in reminding everyone about his achievements when they are good, but objectively they could be better.

Because Lando treats Oscar like he would have liked to be treated.

And judging Oscar's behaviour around Lando, he's aware of how much Lando is taking care of him with those little details.

I'm gonna actually fucking cry, anon you are the brain I wish I had <3

like, I'm gonna link to the post I made that this is in reference to but genuinely your ask is everything that needs to be said. those subtle details were all kind of hazy in my brain but I knew the overall impression - you not only nailed all of them you led it to SUCH a perfect conclusion.

because Lando's been the satellite, the baby, the little brother, the phenom without a win, the one left behind, the former teammate watching his friends form similar (or stronger) bonds with new teammates.

and in all of Oscar's rookie season not once have I given Lando the credit he deserves for being as you say, everything for Oscar he wished he could have had in those first few years of his F1 career.

and goddd, the way Lando alternately loved and hated that Carlos and Daniel were these big brash alpha types. loved it for the protection it afforded but sometimes hated it bc sometimes he was so small to them that he became a something they loved rather than a someone. and this also goes in hand with my feelings about the larry-level car|ando fans forgetting that Lando is a real whole person who doesn't just fit and go along with everything about Carlos like a self-insert for fans.

goddd, y'all please clock this expert piece of landoscar lore in this ask <3

[8myass]

.. all your fault .. pairing. park jisung x female reader genre. angst pov. second person (you, yours, yourself, etc.) (‘y/n’ usage) synopsis. jisung simply wants you to love him. wc. 0.5k cw. yandere!jisung tw. pocket knife, threatening, mentions choking, cursing, mentions death of side characters, gaslighting, pining, victim blaming, delusional ji, pet name (‘darling’), cutting, slapping, name calling (‘bitch’), degradation, blood

“Why can’t you just love me?!” he screamed, forcing the blade of the pocket knife he had in his grip against your already sore throat. He had his hands around your throat just a bit before this incident. You were panicking, sobbing incoherent pleas for him to let you go. You weren’t getting through to him; this was his decision, and it looked like you weren’t going anywhere because of that.

“I-I just want you to love me!” he exclaimed, throwing the knife across the room as his voice echoed through the thin, blood-splattered and dirtied walls of his once peaceful bedroom. You flinched at the sound of the metal of the knife puncturing a hole in the wall, paint flying off in thick shards.

“Is that so fucking hard to ask of you, bitch?!” he yelled, bringing the palm of his hand roughly against your cheek. You wailed out as you fell to the ground, cupping your flushed red cheek with your own hand, bruised knuckles on display for him.

“Yes,” you spat, completely hating everything he was in this instant, “It is way too hard to love a monster like you.”

With your words, he lowly chuckled, bending down to grab a fistful of your hair, jerking your face toward him so he could hiss, “You’re calling me a monster? You know what’s monstrous? The fact you have seen me pine over you for years and you just fucking led me on, not knowing the things it did to me. You broke my heart, you broke me, Y/n. It’s all your fault that you're here in this position right now, it’s all your fault that those people are dead. You killed them with your incessant need to keep me wrapped around your dirty little fingers.”

“Fuck you,” you growled, punching at his chest as a means to get him to let go of you. 

He laughed again, shoving you back down to the floor, standing up to scoff down at your form as you scrambled away from him, “You’re no longer anything like the woman I fell in love with. Why is it so hard for you to cooperate with me?”

“You’re fucking delusional,” you snapped, shaking your head as you buried your face into your exposed knees, bringing them up to your chest to cover the number of tears continuing to fall down your face. “I’ve never been so disgusted with someone in my life.”

“You’re so cute and funny,” he smiled, picking up the knife and tracing his finger along the sharpness of the blade, humming to himself as he took a few steps toward you, lowering his body until he was level with you. He placed his knife against the rough skin of your knee, pressing just enough for it to cut into the flesh, a cry coming from your pained form as you moved your head to lock eyes with him, blood trickling down your shin from your sliced open knee. “You will be even more fun to break, just as you broke me, I promise you, darling. We’ll have so much fun together.”

[lookismfanfics]

Hello! I've discovered your blog and your Lookism works are just- *chef's kiss* 😘 I've been wondering if I could request headcanons for the Lookism Bois (especially my baby Vasco, plus anyone your prefer) on how they would react to a tired s/o.

If this is too much, feel free to ignore this :)

Stay safe and keep yourself hydrated!

-🐮anon

“𝐀𝐫𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐓𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐝?”

Thank you for the request! I did my best… hopefully this is okay.

Warnings: Fluff! Mentions of snarkiness (?)

Vasco • Gun •

𝐕𝐚𝐬𝐜𝐨

ఌ You aren’t constantly tired… and he knows that.

ఌ So it’s only natural that he’s a little worried; and honestly, you can’t blame him.

ఌ You sit with him against the wall, fighting a literal war with yourself to keep your eyes open.

ఌ This week in general has been crazy tiring.

ఌ And how here you are- hanging out with the leader of the Burn Knuckles while on the verge of falling asleep

ఌ Vasco leans forward on the balls of his feet, staring at you shamelessly with unmasked concern.

ఌ You get the sense that you missed something, glancing at him. Euntee, indeed, is looking at you expectantly.

ఌ You rub your eyes, “Huh? Sorry did you say something?”

ఌ Vasco’s eyebrows draw together tightly. “Mhm. Are you tired?”

ఌ It’s not normal for you to be this out of it. Usually, after school, you and Vasco will sit somewhere- anywhere -to talk about how your days went.

ఌ He’ll tell you about funny things that happened, and you’ll give him your full attention (or as much as you can spare) and laugh with him.

ఌ But not today. Today you’re sleepwalking through this conversation, and he can tell.

ఌ “Yeah, just a little.”

ఌ “Why?”

ఌ You adjust your sitting position, slumping further against the wall. “Homework.”

ఌ “But you’re always better than me about homework…” he says slowly, eyes still dark and glazed with seriousness, while his cheeks flush with childish persona.

ఌ And while you nod and mumble an offhand reply about how this week’s assignments were just a bit more difficult, and how time had slipped from you, Vasco seems less than assured that you’re alright.

ఌ He slides his hand into his pocket.

ఌ “Here. It’ll keep you awake.”

ఌ You try not to smile like an idiot, taking the carton of chocolate milk he’s extended to you.

ఌ He wants to keep you awake… and at the same time, he wants to get you somewhere comfortable so you can sleep.

ఌ He knows for a fact that teenagers need a good nights rest to keep growing. Mentally and physically.

ఌ You puncture the top of the carton with the straw, feeling the weight of Vasco’s stare once again on you.

ఌ “I’ll be fine you know. I’ll just take a nap if I still feel tired.”

ఌ He looks at the ground, cheeks flaring sheepishly. You try not to smile, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye.

ఌ He turns to you. “I will be your bed. If you want to sleep right now.”

ఌ 😮‍💨😅

ఌ You cough violently, pulling back from the straw shoved in your mouth. Vasco pats your back.

ఌ Him: 👁️〰️👁️

ఌ You look up at him dubiously. He returns your stare, completely serious.

ఌ “Sleep on a rock? I’m… okay…” you laugh, trying to keep your face from heating up too much. It feels hot in your cheeks, although to be honest you aren’t one to blush to often around Vasco.

ఌ It’s the thought that counts.

ఌ Vasco walks you home, giving you a piggy-back into your room.

ఌ He insists that he stays. He “needs to ensure they get a good nights rest.”

ఌ You fall asleep with Vasco looming in the corner of your room. You wake up nuzzled into his chest.

𝐆𝐮𝐧

ఌ Out of all the days for you to fall asleep at random, burned out from exhaustion, and having little-to-no self awareness, it had to be today.

ఌ The day you would be out with Gun, driving around the Korean countryside in his sports car.

ఌ You didn’t want to go before… and now you really didn’t want to go now.

ఌ Yet here you are. Miserably smushed into the corner of the passenger seat.

ఌ You rub your eyes to keep them open- even as the warmth of the sunlight lulls you to sleep.

ఌ Driving the car, paying little attention to you, is Park Gun.

ఌ You yawn, and he shoots you daggers 🗡️

ఌ “If you didn’t wanna come you should’ve said so.”

ఌ This is what he’s like when you’re out and about. If you seem tired- it automatically means you’re disinterested. According to him.

ఌ “Well today’s just a bad day. Can we go home now?” You ask grumpily

ఌ He turns to you, eyes shaded by his sunglasses. You can see just a hint of a smile on his lips.

ఌ “That’s where I’m taking you.”

ఌ And as soon as you’re home, he’s a bit more understanding; albeit he continues to be judgmental about the whole thing.

ఌ It’s straight to bed for you. He stands by the door impatiently, the car keys slung on his finger and his jacket hanging off his shoulder.

ఌ Guilt-tripping. Lovely

ఌ Gun watches quietly as you take off your accessories (jacket, shoes) and accepts the sleepy glare you give him

ఌ It wasn’t completely your fault… but this guy had been dragging you around to all the exotic locations in Korea for “kicks”

ఌ Late nights out plus your pile of schoolwork at home hadn’t been coordinating well at all.

ఌ He gestures towards your bedroom, and all you can do is sigh irritably.

ఌ “Look I’m sorry, okay? It’s not my fault that people get tired.”

ఌ “It doesn’t matter to me. Fact is we were supposed to have a date today.”

ఌ You nod your head tiredly, entering your bedroom. You didn’t even catch his next comment: “My proposal was ruined thanks to me being an ignorant boyfriend. So… my bad.”

ఌ You collapse into your bed, Gun’s quiet but snarky comments ringing in your head

ఌ You fall asleep by yourself. You wake up with lofi playing and a glass of water on the bedside table.

ఌ He also left you a note in sloppy handwriting, that read: 丅ᗩᛕᗴ ᑕᗩᖇᗴ ᗝᖴ Ƴᗝᑌᖇᔕᗴᒪᖴ ᔕᒪᗴᗴᑭƳ ᗩᔕᔕ