#and no one calls the cops or they never show up idfk

[alexandrium]

Honestly it's strange to hear poice sirens after gunshots anyway. There will literally be like 8 or 10 shots in a row like someone unloading their magazine on someone. And then complete silence for the rest of the night.

[elliethesuperfruitlover]

Give us the smut please 😈

since you asked so nicely

That’s Just the Way You Make Me Feel

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGRzz0oqgUE

A/N: This is going to be a Luba x reader fic. I feel like he doesn’t get a lot of attention, and he’s one of my absolute favorite characters of Robbie’s. This one is going to be really steamy and smutty, so beware of that. Enjoy!

Warnings: Warnings: (spoilers to mute if you haven’t watched it) mention of death, smut (ofc), lap dancing, grinding, oral sex (fem. receiving), making out, public sex (for a section), face sitting, biting, unprotected sex (wrap it luvs x)

 You didn’t plan on visiting Luba at either of his jobs, but you got bored in the house, and why not get out, it’s 2037 for goodness sakes. You didn’t care that he was an escort, or that people sometimes reached into his pants to give him money. As long as he came back to you, and was emotionally attached to you, everything was fine. You weren’t really into having too many sexual relationships with other people. A few friends with benefits here and there, yeah, that’s fine. Luba, however, satisfied you both emotionally and sexually. He always learned new tricks from the stripper robots from the club, and at his escort shop (idfk what they’re called), he was taught how to take men’s dicks whole, and how to pleasure a woman in more than one way. Whenever the both of you were in the mood, he’d try out a couple things, and try to make you as happy as possible.

 The trip to the club was a little longer than expected because the cops had been around more, and tanks were always pouring out pollution, as Naadirah’s death sparked a lot of upset, and people wanted action, so Germany took it. They protected their citizens well in the future, and wanted to make sure that their past was left there, and didn’t reoccur. You looked out of the window, and tried to keep your steamy thoughts from interrupting any conversation that you could potentially have with anyone. Luba’s a creature of movement and emotion, and he made you feel extraordinary things. Everything he did to pleasure you was out of care for you, and the way he ate you up, and kissed your thighs, just….I’m getting carried away here. You arrived at the club, in generally clubbish attire. Something that would catch attention, but not make you feel overwhelmed with what everyone saw you in. Luba would for sure notice. It was one of his floral blouses, you had it cinched at the waist, and wore black peekaboo pants, boots to complete it.

“Hey honey. How’ve you been enjoying work?” you asked Luba, sneaking up behind him from the wall he was leaning against.

“Jesus Christ! You can’t just do that to me, I could’ve been armed, or I could’ve had to take a mean piss!” he jumped, holding his hand to his exposed chest, only to break into a smile, chuckling at your antics.

“You know you love some public humiliation. It’s a kink we have yet to explore, but I’m willing to do so.” you casually muttered, kissing his shoulder.

  Luba’s eyes lidded themselves with lust, then he grabbed your face, kissing you sloppily. You melted into his arms, then your hands began wondering, gently fluttering across the bulge in his low-cut pants, pinching it ever so slightly. He gasped into your touch, slipping his tongue into your mouth, yours remaining in its spot, having to fight for dominance. You let him win for the time being, resulting in grinding against the air, your hips getting tired of being in one place. Luba took a hold of your thigh, stepping forward, and grinding against your sex, holding your limb in place to get the right angle. You held onto his face, cradling it with your hand, thumb rubbing against his cheek. He pulled away just at the peak of his own orgasm, and started at you through the blue and purple lights. Luba bit his lip, then asked you to go to the back, as he had to check out, then take you home, and make love to you how you desire.

“Be back before I start humping the wall, honey.” you said, mimicking the phrase.

  He shook his head, chuckling at your antics, then walked towards the back room, swaying his hips as he moved towards the door. You sat there for short of 4 minutes, and even that couldn’t keep you from touching yourself. You tried to hide behind a wall, dragging two fingers across your pussy through your pants. The hand slipped under your pants, dipping into your honey pot. Quiet, breathy moans left your mouth, and Luba came up from behind you, two hands snaking up your body, cupping your breasts.

“Let’s go. You can’t show everyone what I do to you, now can you? Only I get to see this.” he whispered, biting your ear lobe. You tilted your head into his neck, grinding against him, his head going back as well. His bulge was poorly hidden by the tight pants he sported, the very pink tip of his dick peeking from the top of them. Your nimble fingers find it, swiping your thumb over the tip. Luba’s eyes drifted to yours, and they begged you to touch him more, kiss him more, make him feel the way he wants. You turned around, biting into his neck, your hand wrapping around his cock, jacking him off. He moaned at your actions, his hands squeezing against your hips.

“No, I-. Want to do this at home.” he struggles out, his throat dry, voice deepening. You obliged, hand coming from his pants, and you licked your hand in front of him, eyes making full contact. Luba rushed forward and grabbed a hold of your face, his lips smashing against yours. You both moaned into the kiss, and Luba picked you up, pushing you against a wall, grinding his hard on against your clothed slit. Few people in the club noticed the two of you, even though it was quite packed that night. Soon enough, your slick began to soak through your panties, coming through your pants. Luba noticed, and stuck two fingers down your panties, circling your clit, coating themselves in you. He bit your lip, and carried you the rest of the way to the taxi he ordered. He let you go when you reached the car, and the both of your stared deeply at each other the entire ride. 

  As the car pulled into the driveway, and Luba paid the driver, you unbuckled your bra, heading towards the door. You took it off, and unlocked the door, throwing it across the living room. Luba followed you, and kissed you from behind, breathing your scent.

“Grab a chair, sit in the middle of the room. I’ll be right back.” he whispered into your ear sultrily. You shuddered at his words, but followed his orders. You thought of taking your shoes off, but were interrupted by his voice at the end of the hallway.

“I got that, don’t you worry. Just...relax. I’ll take good, good care of you.” he said, running his hands down your thighs, then taking your boots and socks off, kissing up the length of both of your legs, still clothed. His eyes followed yours, then they turned up, locking on your chest, where your nipples were erect under the translucent shirt. He reached up, and unbuttoned your shirt, exposing the collection of skin and fat on your chest. He fondled them, and brushed his long finger along the side of your body. Goosebumps were patterned along his touch, and you shivered at his eyes, almost completely black with lust.

  Luba brought his finger to his lips, letting it slip into his mouth, wrapping his plump lips around it. He licked along it, then dragged it down his body, across his smooth chest. It stopped at his waistband, where the fewest of stray pubes lay, and dipped into his pants. He took a sharp inhale of breath, and moaned at the feeling. You saw his hand move along his shaft, making slow strokes. He made very deliberate movements, then stopped all of a sudden. His lip was caught between his teeth, and the hand emerged, empty. He was stopping himself from cumming, and was really struggling. A thing Luba liked is teasing, but never on himself. It was always you being teased. And tonight is no different. He shed you of your pants, and you lifted your hips from the chair, revealing your lace underwear, and when you sat back down, you felt your wetness on the chair. You could feel his breath hitch, and soon enough, he stood up, and led his hips to yours. He walked over the vintage record player on the television stand. His ass stuck out as he put a vinyl on, and turned around just as it started.

Baby, don’t make me spell it out for ya’

All of the feelings that I’ve got for ya’

 His vest and tie came right off, and Luba threw them in a random direction, to be picked up the next morning….or afternoon if you’re lucky. He walked over to you, and sat on your lap. His feet supported his own weight, on both sides of the chair they lay.

                                            Oh. That’s where this is going.

He began grinding against you, his pants doing nothing to smother his hardened length. Every beat was another roll of his hips, forcing a moan from you, as his head turned with every touch you put on him. His hands dug into the wood of the chair, and his voice strained as the pressure kept building up. Your fingers played along his chest, stopping here and there to drop a few kisses, or pinch one of his nipples.

It’s like I’m powerful with a little bit of tender

An emotional sexual bender

He humped your body, his face contorting, just like the beat did. His hips flexed, and the smoothness of his back never felt so good. Everything just felt so beautiful, and real, and intimate between you two. You’d been waiting on him to finally show some of his skills to you, but you never thought you’d be this close. Every grind against sex felt like pure paradise. His eyes were constantly closed, and only opened when a particular angle hit a little harder than intended.

Mess me up, yeah no one does it better

There’s nothin’ better

 He always treated you like you deserved. Even when he came home from a rough night of clients, he always made sure that you were the top priority. If your feet were bothering you from the ballet shoes, he’d rub them, and offer to carry you to bed. If you were cramping, he’d fix you tea, and treat you so well. You knew that it was a bi-product of Naadirah. He loved her so much, and did the things he did, and still does for her. She was somewhat blind in what he did, and he’s hurt. Every now and then he gets really upset about it, he can’t treat clients well enough, when he has a shift at the club, his face is glossed over with happiness. That’s where you stepped in, and told him to let it out. Nobody deserves to be treated that way. He did all that, and for what? Nothing? And I know you’re not supposed to speak ill of the dead, but she was a bit of a bitch now. He always put on this chipper exterior, and you were happy that today was a really good day. So good that-

“Ah, yes! Right there.” he moans, as you realize that as you’ve been thinking, your hand drifted down to stroke him. Lu was very close to cumming, but you decided not to allow it.

  You stopped your actions, and humped him still, not giving him a complete break. He was whimpering against your touch, and felt bad that you were teasing him so. Though, not bad enough to stop. Every little grunt, and breathless pant that fell from those perfect lips made you want to burst, but not quite. He looked deep into your eyes, then put his hand out, sweaty and clammy, covered in marks from the wooden chair. You grabbed his hand, and he led you to the floor, not too far from where the chair was. He got your black panties from your body, dragging them against his face, rubbing them against his chest. The very thought made you drip straight onto the floor. They made their stop at his pants, where he stuffed them into his pants, lightly jacking his cock off with the fabric. The wetness from the fabric, and the scratchiness of it were pure heaven for him, but you, as always, were the top priority. He kissed your lips, pulling away with a loud smack. He nibbled, then bit along your neck, and moaned when his bulge brushed right up against your knee, in the best of ways. He licked the rest of the way down, and, though you weren’t clean shaven in the least, he ate you right up. Little kitten licks were rewarded to your clitoris, the wet sound resonating in the hot air. 

“Look at me real quick.” he asked, your wetness coating his chin.

  You did so, and a hand made its way to Luba’s face, and a middle finger made its way into his mouth, making you moan in earnest, and it found its destination quite quickly. Your wet, warm, and inviting pussy. Your mouth opened from the intrusion, and Luba began praising you quietly, with little “good girl” and every now and then “oh, look at you, so wet for me.” He was doing a good job of making you almost cum, but at the last moment, his finger would switch and you felt his lips form into a smirk against your sex.

“Got an idea.” you mustered out, and he pulled away, his chin dripping juice onto the floor, just as you were.

  He sat on his haunches, waiting for your action. You motioned for him to lie down, and he did as you asked. His eyes glimmered with the light, and you moved your body to go on top of his face. You heard a short “oh, Gott, yes.” , and his hands went to your bottom to try to keep you in place. Hips lowered onto faces, and your mouth formed an o, and your hands were beside his head, and your thighs were putting pressure on his face. He moaned at your antics, and that urged you to almost scream from the sensation. You began to slowly move against him, the cold tip of his nose touching your pubic mound, right before the main action. His tongue began moving in turn with our hips, and suddenly a spot was hit. Your mouth opened in ecstasy, and backs arched.

That’s just the way you make me feel.

That’s just the way you make me feel.

So real, so good, so fuckin’ real

  He fucked you so good, all the time. His tongue was just perfect for your pussy, and he attacked it with such precision.

That’s just the way you make me feel.

That’s just the way you make me feel.

  You rode Luba’s face through your orgasm, and your thighs let up on his head. Underneath all that action, Luba caught your release in his mouth, opening it, just where you can see it. You urged him to swallow, and he did, or so you thought. Your lips met his after your hips shifted on top of his, and some of the remaining liquid made its way into your mouth, and you moaned at the feeling. Luba motioned for you to stand up, and you did, almost slipping on your slick. He giggled a little, then sat himself down on the chair, still wet. You sat on top of his cock very slowly, letting yourself sink down inch by long inch. The veins on his cock pulsed into your walls, and you were almost ahegao-ing from the sensation. You sank down on his dick, and your ass was stuck out from the angle. Luba groaned at you, smiling back at you. Your hands were on his shoulders, and you were just aching to start moving. His hands resting on your back, ready to guide you. Your body sank down on him, and your pussy stretched to accommodate the length. It felt so good, and you let him know. The little gasps that left your body were far and flung between. His mouth was kissing along your collarbone and clavicle, giving them special attention.

   Soon enough, he began thrusting back into you, slowly at first. His feet were angled on the floor, his toes curling when certain angles were hit. You were thriving in his touch, and he in yours. The two of you made love so beautifully that night, nothing was as precious, and as clear cut. You two were so enthralled with each other, every insertion, grab of skin, kiss. Every little exchange between thrusts that could be shared eye contact, or even nose kisses between each other. It was all so strong and sensitive. Nothing beat that feeling of pure togetherness. It was so close, and hot. You could just cream around him from the sheer feeling of his head touching the spot right where your womb began. The pace slowly began to quicken between the two of you, and Luba’s balls slapped between your body, and your breasts bounced up and down from the gravity of the situation. You ground into him, and he grabbed you with his entire form, and moaned against your neck, and out of nowhere, there was a very loud crack.

That's just the way that I feel now, baby

Good God! I can't help it! Agh!

That's just the way that I feel, yeah

Please! I can't help it

“Oh fuck! Right there baby! I-I’m cumming!” he says, ignoring the fact that the two of you were on the ground, fucking the hardest in forever.

   You followed suit, squeezing around his cock, and cumming on his length. You moaned into the open air, and wrapped your arms around his back, slowly grinding to relieve yourself. He kissed down your neck to calm you down and picked the both of you up from the remains of the poor chair. He fixed the both of you a hot bath, and you cleaned him up, trying to cover up the hickies the best you could. You dressed him, as well as yourself. You ate a bowl of Frosted Flakes, and attempted to super-glue the chair back together. You went back to Luba in bed, and he was close to asleep, nodding off. You kissed his shoulder, and his hands, cuddling up against him. He was blushing by the time you were done, but it all worked out in the end. Except for Naadirah of course.

Masterlist

[psycho-slytherin]

Strangers ch. 42

Yoongi confronts your attacker, and you awaken from one nightmare into another.

Pairing: Idol!Yoongi x Actress!Reader

Word count: 1.9k

Genre: fluff, angst, idfk

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<–– Prev   Next ––>

“What? Who the fuck are you? Get out of my house before I call the police!” The redhead reaches for the door in an attempt to close it, but Yoongi’s hold is too strong. He’s been waiting for this moment for two weeks– and he won’t let the opportunity slip away.

“You don’t know me, Seoyeon? And here I thought you were a fan.” With his free hand, Yoongi reaches up and pulls down his mask. Seoyeon’s sneer falls in an instant, replaced with the look of utter shock and adoration that Yoongi knows so well.

“Yoon-Suga? Wait, oh- oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my-” Seoyeon’s eyes roll up into her head and she keels over backwards, hitting the floor with a heavy thump. 

Well, that was quick. Y/n fainted too, Yoongi remembers, when she first saw him. Looking at the fallen girl, part of Yoongi wants to feel sympathy for her. After all, she’s a fan. 

But then he remembers Y/n shaking as she told Yoongi what the woman in front of him had done to her. He remembers every time he saw his friend flinch at a light breeze, the tremor in her voice when she explained that scar on her leg, and his own fear at finding Y/n’s bloody coat in the river.

All because of her. And so Yoongi lets himself into the house, quietly closing the door behind him as he waits for her to wake up. 

It had taken D two weeks to find Kang Seoyeon’s name and address from nothing more than the photo Yoongi had gotten off of Lisa’s laptop. Only now, as he stares at the woman’s motionless frame, Yoongi wonders if she really could have been capable of hurting Y/n like that. She’s pretty, petite, and vaguely reminds Yoongi of a pixie. 

Another minute passes before Seoyeon begins to shift groggily. “Wha…”

“I’m not helping you up,” Yoongi says shortly.

Seoyeon’s head snaps up, her piercing eyes capturing Yoongi’s own. “Suga. Suga! It really wasn’t a dream?” She scrambles to her feet, reaching forward, and Yoongi suddenly feels as though he’s about to be eaten alive.

“I knew it,” Seoyeon whispers reverently. “Cap said you’d come to me. We’re meant to be.”

Y/n’s right– she’s psycho.

Yoongi feels darkness pooling in his heart, and loathing bubbling to the surface. “I don’t care what you think is meant to be. But there’s someone I do care about– and you deserve to rot in prison for what you did to her.”

“I- what… oh!” Seoyeon lowers her arms, an eerie smile growing on her face, much too wide to seem genuine. “You mean Y/n?”

Yoongi growls– a low, animalistic rumble– as he takes a step closer. “You tried to kill her.”

“But- ah,” Seoyeon seems to wince at the cold fury in his voice. Good. “I did it to protect you! Y/n thinks you belong to her, but you don’t!” Faster than Yoongi can react, Seoyeon’s hands shoot out and grab Yoongi’s shoulders with a grip forceful enough to hurt, the smile never leaving her face. “You belong to me, to us, Suga! To ARMYs!”

Shit. She’s stronger than he expected. But perhaps… 

“Don’t. Touch. Me.” Yoongi says, lacing a note of authority into his tone. Unbelievably, Seoyeon’s grip loosens, and Yoongi uses the opportunity to push her hands away from him. 

I don’t belong to anyone,” Yoongi continues forcefully, watching Seoyeon seem to shrink before him. “And nothing gives you the right to hurt her!”

Seoyeon pauses, and the house is dead silent for an eternal minute. “Nothing?” She begins snickering– quietly at first, but soon enough she doubles over with laughter. “You really don’t know what’s going to happen to your pretty little girlfriend, do you?”

It’s as though Yoongi’s blood has turned to ice. “What?”

“Ooh, you don’t know! Well, Cap said not to say…” Seoyeon pretends to think. 

Yoongi grinds his teeth together in frustration; he knows he’s being baited, but if Y/n’s in danger… “Tell me.”

Seoyeon’s eyes are blown out as she stares at Yoongi, licking her lips. “I’d consider it a favor. I’d be willing to do you a lot of favors, you know. I’m… very good at favors.”

Yoongi’s stomach lurches. He doesn’t want to know what Seoyeon would do to him. “Don’t give me more reasons to call the cops. I could have you arrested.”

Seoyeon laughs again. “For what?”

“Attempted murder isn’t enough?” Yoongi fires back. “You nearly killed Y/n, you bi-”

“There’s no evidence. No one saw anything– I’m untouchable.” Seoyeon advances menacingly. “But you know who isn’t? Y/n.”

Yoongi opens his mouth to– he’s not sure; Question? Yell? Threaten?– when his phone buzzes in his pocket. He winces, unwilling to tear his eyes from the predator before him. Still, it could be Y/n– and Yoongi’s been worrying over her condition. He places himself between Seoyeon and the door before answering his phone, eyes never leaving hers.

“Yes?”

“Yo, Gloss, that girl you got me tracking down with the shitty dye job?”

Oh, it’s just his old friend. “D, I’m busy, let me call you later.”

“Nah, man, you gotta hear this. You’re gonna like it.”

Seoyeon stands motionless before him. Yoongi’s time before his driver bursts in is almost up and he hasn’t gotten a confession. “Fine. What is it?”

“Remember that photo of you and your girl that went viral a while back?”

How could he forget? The infamous picture from that night got him and Y/n into the whole publicity mess and changed their relationship forever. 

“I was tracking Seoyeon’s IP address and digging through her socials… dude, the original photo came from one of her accounts.”

Yoongi’s blood turns to ice as D continues: “A bunch of these ARMY girls have backup accounts, and this one’s hers. You’ve got a stalker, my man.”

Could it be true? Had Kang Seoyeon followed Yoongi to the hospital and found Y/n? Were her injuries and trauma his fault?

Yoongi swallows, feeling the wave of anxiety almost drown him before he pushes it away. Not now. 

“Thanks for letting me know,” he manages.

“No worries. Yo, what’s wrong? Are you-” Beep. Yoongi hangs up and shoves the phone into his pocket. “Now, where were we? Oh, right. You were going to tell me everything you know about Y/n and anyone that could hurt her.”

Seoyeon laughs, a pitched, wild noise. “Excuse me? Who said I’d tell you anything?”

Yoongi barely has to lean forward until he’s so close that Seoyeon needs to tilt her head up to look at him. “I did.”

Yoongi can hear her breath catch, practically seeing the wheels turning in her head. If she’s truly as obsessive as he thinks she is… 

After a pause, Seoyeon grins. “Fine. Cap’s gonna hate me, but fine. I’ll tell you everything, and just in case you think I’m bullshitting, I’ll show you I mean business… for a price.”

Yoongi blinks. Is she bluffing? Could Y/n really be in danger? Am I in danger too?

“So? What’ll it be?”

Y/n. It’s for Y/n. But is it worth it?

~~~

“Help! Help me!” A garbled, genderless voice yells.

“I’m trying!” You cry, running through the empty streets. The voice echoes around every corner. “Tell me where you are! I don’t know how to help you!”Suddenly you trip, falling hard. The pavement has turned into your bed, your legs tangled in the sheets.

“No one needs help from a traitor,” the same voice says from inside your head. “A liar.”

You struggle to rise, but your mattress seems to envelop you, pulling you in, and instead of soft sheets and down you’re surrounded by ice, unable to find purchase.

“I’m not a liar!” You scream, scrabbling for grip as the ice rises past your shoulders. Goosebumps erupt on your flesh and you begin shivering violently, the only movement the ice will allow. “T-t-tell me ho-w to f-find you!”

“Find me?” The ice finishes swallowing you whole, the gaping chasm closing above your head. You know you shouldn’t be able to breathe but your chest still rises and falls with the desperate action. “All you have to do… is look in a mirror.” The ice beneath your feet disappears and you’re dropped into the yawning darkness. You blink and the area is suddenly flooded with light. You’re in a jail cell, empty except for a large mirror. You feel something dry and sweet in your mouth, and when you glance at the mirror… 

Lisa stares back at you, a pastry between her teeth. You spit it out, reaching forward. Lisa mirrors you, her hand outstretched.

“Where are you?” You murmur, watching as your words escape Lisa’s mouth. Suddenly her lips in the mirror curl into a smirk.

“I’m right in front of you. I always have been.”

“No!” Your eyes fly open, your heart thundering. You clutch at your chest, feeling as though the hand is holding your very being from falling to pieces. Fumbling for your phone, you wince at the bright screen before noticing the time. 4:00– well, it’s longer than you’ve managed to sleep all week. You groan at yet another nightmare, falling back onto your pillow with a sense of defeat. You hate this fear within you, but what can you do? Lisa’s gone and the redhead may have gotten to her. The detective told you not to worry, but how can you not worry? And now your mom is cutting you off, and you might have to drop out, and Lisa is gone, and it seems like the only constant left in your life is Yoongi.

Yoongi. You chuckle hollowly, falling back onto your pillow. He’s the least consistent person you know, but at least he’s always been there for you.

Ignoring your stomach’s rumbling protests, you close your eyes and turn over, praying sleep takes you again.

And take you it does– sweet, dreamless sleep captures you and when you blearily awake again it’s with sunlight streaming through your windows. It must be late in the morning already. Your phone buzzes obnoxiously with what sound like dozens of notifications.

Maybe I should just delete Twitter, you muse defeatedly as you flip over your phone, scrolling mindlessly through your mentions. Right away, you notice something strange:

@bangtan_thotyeondan: yo I hated on @yourname at first but tbh that was a brutal move by #SUGA :(

@armyteez23: I told @queerqueen this would happen! @yourname deserves better umu

@captainkookie21: I told you @BTS_twt @yourname

@dduddudude: Y’all feeling bad for @yourname when the bitch had it coming all along

@bangtan-news: (1/3)BREAKING! #SUGA announces the relationship with @yourname is OVER! A thread:

@bangtan-news: (2/3)In an exclusive interview, #SUGA discussed the break from @yourname and his new girlfriend, @seoyeonnie-loves-bts! 

@bangtan-news: (3/3) @yourname has not released a statement on the situation. Stay tuned!

Your jaw drops. The relationship is over? New girlfriend? What... what happened? You click on the linked profile and check @seoyeonnie-loves-bts’s most recent post– it’s just a photo with a heart caption.

You suddenly feel sick. The- it- it’s… 

“You.” You whisper, all blood draining from your face. “You. And…”

The photo is of a beautiful redheaded girl. Her. She’s beaming, fingers interlaced with those of a very familiar man. 

You stare into Yoongi’s eyes in the photo, trying desperately to see something that isn’t there. You struggle for a second to form words, barely able to breathe. “You.”

[jake-marshall]

Creamsicle Comicon AU

Alrighty so I’ve seen a couple posts flying around about how Larry would encourage and adore Freddy’s fanboy nerdiness, which!  Yes!  Absolutely! and even the idea of them going to a Con together which is equal parts adorable and hysterical (especially if there were cameos by the other Dogs). But my brain’s gone an entirely different direction and it’s been the only thing I’ve been thinking about all damn day.    So what if it wasn’t Creamsicle going to the Con but meeting at the Con. All under the cut bc it got long

Freddy is, of course, himself.  A cop, yeah, but moreso a big fcking geek and so he goes to all 4 days of this con (I’m basing it off of SDCC even tho I’ve never been and my only experiences with cons are those of the sports variety but anyway).  So, he’s not undercover, or anything.  He’s just there, as one would be. As for Larry, even though I’m under the impression that Joe’s jobs involved robbery of objects versus cold hard cash, I could probably spin it either way for this.    There’s a silent auction on the last day of the Con and this’ll be a haul if (when) they pull it off.  Huge.  Or, again, I could go with the idea that they steal the items but I’d have to think about it more. Now, to get into the Con, Joe has Larry and, either Eddie or Brown as his partner.  I’m leaning towards Eddie bc I want Vic to show up in the fic at some point as a cameo, and also Eddie would be more suspicious/heated about Freddy and the eventual revelation that he’s a cop, imo.  Although I don’t believe Joe would put Eddie on a job that would directly put him in danger, Eddie would be at the con to be an extra set of eyes and ears, and because I think he (or Brown) is most believable as knowing a thing or two about comics/sci-fi/the characters. So, that’s important because.  Larry is there basically with the stolen identity of a big name collector/seller of [insert x comic here].  This guy - tentatively I’m naming him Al White, in reference to Larry’s canon aliases (and therefore making Larry “Mr. White” in this, lol) - is from states and states away (maybe Wisconsin, like Larry is?) and has no family, and is a notorious recluse - no one even knows what he looks like, he just mail orders all his collectibles.  The catch with Larry needing to be the one to pose as this dude is because of his age -  someone as young as the other Dogs (well, except Blue but this is a creamsicle fic so naturally I go with Larry) would not be the logical choice as an imposter. So this guy, this Mr. White, this is going to be the first time he shows his face at a public sort of function.  He’s looking to sell a ton of his items and in doing so is going to appear at SDCC (or LACC I guess whatever).   But, you ask, how would Larry and Eddie obtain these items and also do so without alerting him to what they’re doing?  Simple.  Kill him (or maybe Joe hires someone else to kill him so Larry’s not there when it happens, than have the stuff shipped to the LACC directly, which would make sense if this guy was a recluse, for him to have as little interaction as possible).  Ditch the body.  Make up fake IDs/steal his identity. No one will be any the wiser. As for Larry and Freddy meeting, it’d be the Preview Night, when those who attend all 4 days get the opportunity to check out the exhibit hall to see what would be available.  Larry is still setting up and intends to lay low for most of it anyway, so as not to draw attention or raise suspicion due to the fact he doesn’t know jack shit about this kinda stuff.  Eddie’s given him a crash course on what he should definitely know but he’s just like praying for this thing to end so he can get the loot and be done with this job. Freddy would obviously be drawn to this stand, with tons of other people.  He’d be, not star struck, but just like, in awe and in his element and would strike up conversation with other people there about the items.  Larry is there and since no one knows what Mr. White looks like (and maybe his ID lanyard is hidden or turned around that anyone can’t see it), none of the other con-goers realize that this is The Guy - they just think he’s there helping set up or whatever.  But he listens closely to Freddy and tries to pick up some of this info of the comic shit that he should file away if he wants to keep the front up, and of course  he thinks this kid is a trip and a half, but in a good way.  Maybe for all his enthusiasm, gives him a little freebie from the collection and Freddy is like hell yeah, whoa... wait a minute, you can’t do that, what will Mr. White think if you give away this shit for free?    And Larry would introduce himself as this Mr. White.  Freddy would just be like wow whoa the man the myth the legend... didn’t think he’d look like you /smirk/ Larry like, in good humor, what in the fuck is that supposed to mean? Freddy tries to play it off like, haha nothin just ah ya know you’re not how I pictured him - look pretty good for a shut-in hermit, I guess. ANYWAYYYYY that’s most of what I got except for over the next few days leading up to the heist they get to know each other lol except for Larry finding out Freddy is a cop. That doesn’t happen bc Freddy is not gonna just like, divulge that kind of info, so he just says he “works for the city” (Larry surprised he even has a job at all, lol). Also them going out to a bar the night before the heist is to go down (so they meet on a Wednesday, this night out is a Saturday, and they’ve hung out several times already).  And finally shit goes down and they make out like teenagers in the men’s room or something equally unsavory - but then it’s interrupted by something going on in the bar.  A fight, altercation of some sort (I could probably put Mr. Pink in here as a cameo, getting his ass beat for running his mouth - maybe by a waitress LOL nah jk) and it turns really loud and violent.  Both Larry and Freddy would try to break it up?  Larry gets hurt and Freddy announces himself as an officer and is able to descalate the situation and call for backup to have the guy arrested but ofc Larry’s hurt and he’s like oh shit dude you’re hurt we gotta get you some medical attention (another movie ~homage~) but all Larry can say in response is, “You’re a cop?” And Freddy, like, “Yeah... I’m a cop...”

I have no idea what I want to do after this.  I want a happy ending for the boys and the best thing I can think of is if Vic does show up later as a replacement to Larry (because Eddie’s aware of Larry hanging out with Freddy and if he finds out he’s a cop, well... Larry would be in deep shit and Joe would absolutely take him off the job, but then I think Larry would feel he needs to hurt/kill Freddy so like...idk).  And if Vic actually does attempt the heist but also threatens  civilians in the process, then (almost) like the movie, White would take him out? (lol but I want vic and eddie to be “happy” in this too in the background so idfk i’m just literally rambling into the void). BUT YEAH THAT’S WHAT I’VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT ALL DAY.  suggestions welcome!

[ofphcenixes]

BLUE & LIBBY - text thread 001

texts from 3:55pm to 7:01pm

blue

hey lib. (: havent talked today. just wanted to drop in and see if u were doin alright i have memes if u need them

libby

i mean, technically we did talk. i reminded you of the moment the world stood still: when valentine and you made contact (1) time. are you okay though? you seem a little, weird

blue

i maintain that valentine was an alien in a spider suit that wanted to destroy me but u know what I mean djdjdjd just chats between us. the gc has been a june holden fest lately lmao hope it works out for them tho anyways i am always weird in ur eyes djdjhd. but im fine. shit was crazy that night and we never really got to talk about what happenedand if u wanted to talk i just want u to kno im here ABOUT NADIA bc yeah kdjdjjd

libby

don't talk to me or my son ever again yeah, wow, okay so holden stayed over the night. i only know that because i saw his stuff in her room? i think she mentioned that like, it was a one time thing but i feel like... he might be coming over again which.. is Interesting oh. yeah, no i think i'm okay. i guess just in shock. june is very broken up over it, so i'm doing my best to be a good pal, and bring loads of ice cream and kisses. /: do you wanna talk? about nadia? i know that she like, meant something to you

blue

ok good luck getting me to stop talkin to u but as for valentine? bye Felecia! is that right. hmm well he doesn’t seem like much is goin on so maybe they were just,, hanging out. bringing a bag over is pretty damning tho. and if he does come over and u see him tell that bih he owes me $ bc he ate my fucking chorizo salad ): r u proud lib?? I ate a salad by choice well I would have if Holden wasn’t a lil birch bitch DONT CENSOR ME fuck. im sorry. ): i actually wanted to see june today tbh. but if u need anyone pls let me know alright? id skip practice if u needed me, lib WELL. i mean ok i was sorta close with her in middle school and she’s always been a friend and I just. I’m just fucking numb tbh. I really can’t believe it

libby

i'll have you know that valentine died shortly after my 18th birthday so ): idk idk, why would they hang out in her room if they were "hanging out"? like they have history. i feel like thats, a little too ... suspicious given the context. in a good way though. like i hope it works out theyre both so miserable without each other. oh my god!! look at you go! so proud of you, dude! ( even if you never got to it lmao ) no, no, it's okay. june needs all the support she can get, and i don't wanna impede. i'm really fine, i just sort of need to accept it and i guess reflect on how terrible it is. she was a really sweet person and fuck i really cant believe any of it i guess

blue

fuck what kdjdjdnd I thought valentine just yeeted shit that’s not a good way to put it fuck but. im sorry lib ): ok I take it back Valentine was alright. still scared the fuck out of me tho all i know is that if i loved someone as much as holden loves june, i wouldn’t let you go **THEM fuck Damn phone Typos Djdjhdi can’t believe u make me eat green stuff its truly CRUEL whomst? I only know nadia just didn’t fucking deserve any of this. shit even daisey didn’t. i just want to protect everyone and i don’t know HOW it goes without saying that im happy to be ur uber driver for the indefinite future

libby

no omg, i took good care of my boy. idk what happened, they can live up to like 15 years so i was pretty bummed tbh. i was a bad mom he appreciates your support from the grave though i mean, i guess. but not everyone you love is going to love you back, i think that's where holden's at. not everyone wants to be clung to, and june seems reluctant besides, you know all about that. holden, the love of your life, loves june. how sad it's good for you!!! i'm helping i ... feel so badly for both of them. i can't imagine how their families must be feeling, fuck. i hate this. i'm moving to spain ah, dude you don't have to do all that. you probably are busy with practice, and holden, and work. thank you tho

blue

im sure ur a great mother. ): but still valentine was lucky to have u. and im sure he misses u in his weird spider heaven web of flies and whatever it is spiders like idk ill dm peter parker and find out i mean... guess that’s true. I suppose I dont get to see how june feels most of the time. i just wish they’d talk about it and sort it out at least. they both deserve to be happy holden is the loml that is true aksjjsjd. holden has enough room for both me and june in his heart. so i mean technically i can love someone else too?? but enough about that lmfao you definitely are helping. even coach has noticed dkdjd. making me better without even trying u can’t move without me who’s gonna get me free popcorn ): you’re just as important as practise and holden to me, lib.

libby

god, i miss him. you think the girls would be mad if i bought another one? like, to keep in my room.  i know! they're both obviously still in love, you can tell. i can't wait for them to overcome this and get to be together. also, im grateful for the amount of sleep i'm able to get now that... the room next to mine is less loud welp, i hope you find someone who is willing to share you with holden lol oMG, REALLY? IDK WHY THAT MADE ME IRRATIONALLY HAPPY LOL. WE CAN GET SALAD LATER let's go, we'll go to spain and take on a new identity. we can live along the coast and work in a bakery or something. get a puppy don't show holden that text he might cry. but dsjflk thank you, you're very important to me too. kinda my best pal

blue

u would have to ask. but if you did get another what would u call it? thanksgiving? funnily enough valentine is only a few weeks away. a sign?? i mean fuck ive known holden for years and can confirm he is happiest when he’s with june. when she’s not roasting him at least lmfao. and if my MasterPlan works im afraid things will get bad again djdjdj. I can take one for the team and try to get them to come over here tho - u don’t need to deal with that shit i hope i do too tbh. and who would I want it to be u ask? that’s right. danny devito. LETS NOT GET TOO CRAZY IVE ALREADY HAD THREE VEGETABLES THIS WERK AND ITS ONLY TUESDAY. I think it’s popcorn time 8) bold of u to assume i know where Spain is dkdjdjdjdj well he’s gonna catch on soon enough we spend every day together at this point lol

libby

i was gonna name this one patrick, after st patricks day actually lol. yes you know what's also approaching that is more important? your birthday! i know, it doesnt take a rocket scientist to figure that out. he's v much a relationship kinda dude, actually bc he's also kinda slutty lol. but even june is sad and its just, SO HARD. i hate when people are clearly, happiest together are like, nO IM GOING TO PROLONG THE MISERY. i feel like we're in a rom-com. how do we get them back together? i'll let him know. my v-day gift from me to you oooo, should i get the skittles ready too then? popcorn is kinda of a veggie if you think abt it omg, okay well now you can't come with me. offer rescinded. im going with the hot cop lslsfkjdjkldfs i mean its not like we're doing anything weird, so its okay, right?

blue

ur so cute wtf. although if u did do this i hope u know im calling him patrick star. also how the fuck do u tell if its a female or a male spider theyre so small and gross. fuck it is too lol. i dont have any money so im gonna let ppl down on the party front lmao. ud still come tho, right? how can he be both slutty and relationshippy. like not to be weird bc i know hes ur cousin and all dkfjgg but he doesnt.. have people over anymore. unless hes someone learned not to stomp around the house WHICH I DONT BELIEVE. and ha hA im already on plan 384 to get them back together get on my level lmao.  we just gotta force them to spend time together tbh. does that mean i have to give u the hot cop for valentines bc i mean. i would if that's what u wanted but im sure u can do much better than him OH FUCK UR RIGHT OUR WHOLE RELATIONSHIP HAS BEEN A LIE TO CONVERT ME TO VEGGIES HASNT IT r u breaking up with me? well fine, ill take the dog ): it's... it's not weird unless we make it weird. and we haven't. have we?

libby

fdsjfjdsl shhhhh, back at you. Patrick Star will be his full name, i promise you this much. as for gender idfk, i am honestly assuming its pronouns lol. i'd be sued by the LGBT community if they knew. also dude, of course. i'll make you cupcakes. plus i know what i wanna buy you! i  can't wait dude what? really?? i thought he was seeing people this whole time, holy shit. dude he's really messed up over this huh? wow, okay, we need to kick this into high gear and have them get back together. tell me your plans. omg, no you clown. i don't even like him that much, he's just pretty. i do like... some personality and he has 0 GOD MY PLAN HAS BEEN FOILED. I CANT BELIEVE IT like i'd ever let you take the dog. she's mine sdfjlkdsfjlk iDK DUDE. I MAY HAVE MADE IT WEIRD BUT WE'RE BAD AT TALKING ABT STUFF, SO WE DONT HAVE TO LOL.

blue

do spiders even have gender i thought they were just the minions of evil lmfao lib u rly dont have to get me anything, really. altho now im curious tbh. but get ready for me to get a lit gift in june >:) ill even wrap it myself which says a lot bc i cant wrap for shit but i want it to be personal lmao not many that im aware of atm. will give u info is this changes. huh we r spies lib. >:) but i dont have any current plans except trying to force them to go in a photo booth together or something when we eventually go to the arcade djsjdh omg how did u know. but idk everyone speaks about him like hes gOD he’s just a dude. eyebrows on fleek tho I will say that IM SO HURT UD USE ME LIKE THIS LIB. ALL THIS TIME WE WERE GETTING CLOSE AND U WERE ONLY HERE FOR THE VEGGIES so u get Spain AND the dog. what do I get, sadness ???? you haven’t made it weird lib, i promise. not to me, anyway. maybe we both wanted the same thing. maybe. oR MAYBE NOT LMFAO but yeah we can talk about whatever lol

libby

don't talk about nate like that omg! i want to, plus its a surprise so no asking what it is. also wow i cant believe you remember my birthday, lol. you dont have to get me anything. you can buy me an ice cream though oh my gOD THAT'S BRILLIANT! aw, what if they take one of those cute kiss pictures in the photobooth like in the movies? i can't wait for them to love each other again, they're so cute. are you jealous that no one is talking about your eyebrows? you have nice eyebrows and nothing to be jealous abt GOD, IM SO SORRY. ROY HIRED ME. HE WAS WORRIED ABT YOUR HEALTH. IM SORRY YOU HAD TO FIND OUT THIS WAY. I THOUGHT YOU NEVER WOULD /: you get the memory of what we were to keep you warm right, cool. noted

blue

why do u talk about the string bean all the time i know u grew up with him but seriously he's like a pale pipe cleaner that i dont need in my life ofc i remeber ur birthday lib. dont u remember ur 10th?? probably the best day of my life lmao. and if u get me something i get u something thats how this works as long as june doesnt say anything mean and holden say anything stupid, its a pretty solid plan tbh. im not jealous HOW DARE ROY PLAY ME LIKE THIS. cant believe u betrayed me lib, after all we've been through ;-; but what if i want something to sell off now that u took the house oh fuck lib i didn't mean it like that. just... pretend i said nothing ok and. yeah talk about something else

libby

hey sorry, i gotta go. talk tomorrow.

blue

oh is everything ok? but alright talk tomorrow then i guess bye lib

libby

night

blue

its 6pm lib but okay night

blue

lib if i did something u dont have to tell me but pls know i didnt mean it, whatever it was. i hope youre okay. but i wont bother u again i promise. just. yeah

libby

it's okay, dude. i'm fine. it's honestly my own fault, it's not you. you're always great. i'm sorry. it's fine

blue

i dont understand what ur talking about but i can tell u dont want to so ill just... leave this. but you're always great too lib. the greatest, in fact. just let me know if ur still coming to the arcade later or not yeah

libby

i guess i'll go. i like pacman.

blue

if u... if u change ur mind i understand. but i really hope u can make it.

[mrbananny]

Get to Know Me!

Stolen from @thegirlinthetrashcan

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people

1. Drink: Soda

2. Phone call: I called uf0 the other night

3. Text message: Sending a drawing of Comet to my irl friend

4. Song you listen to: Stay - Zedd, Alessia Cara

5. Time you cried: half an hour ago whoopsie

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: I’ve never dated anyone

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: I’ve never kissed anyone

8. Been cheated on: No

9. Lost someone special: Not really

10. Been depressed: Yes

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: I’ve never drank alcohol

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12-14: Purple, Blue, Orange

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: Yes

16. Fallen out of love: No

17. Laughed until you cried: The other night with uf0

18. Found out someone was talking about you: Yes

19. Met someone who changed you: Yes

20: Found out who your friends are: Yes

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: See question 7

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: I don’t have facebook

23. Do you have any pets: Three dogs, Sassy, Storm and Atticus, one bird, Tiki, and six chickens and six ducks

24. Do you want to change your name: Maybe my last name,,

25. What did you do for your last Birthday: Went to school, came home and went to bed

26. What time do you wake up: 10 am

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: Drawing Bad Cop

28. Name something you can’t wait for: The LEGO Movie Sequel!

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: Earlier today

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: So many things

31: What are you listening to right now: Message Man - Twenty One Pilots

32: Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yeah

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: My entire existence???

34. Most visited website: Youtube 

LOST QUESTIONS. I JUST PUT IN RANDOM INFO ABOUT ME

35. Mole/s: Nope

36. Mark/s: Nah

37. Childhood dream: Video Game designer

38. Hair color: Dirty blonde

39. Long or short hair: Medium

40. Do you have a crush on someone: Not really?

41. What do you like about yourself: Nothing really

42. Piercings: My ears but I don’t wear earrings much

43. Blood type: idfk

44. Nickname: Nano!

45: Relationship status: Single an uninterested 

46: Zodiac: Scorpio

47. Pronouns: She/her

48. Favorite TV show: I’ve been trying to watch Parks and Rec and Ninjago

49. Tattoos: None

50. Right or left hand: Right

51. Surgery: I don’t think so I can’t remember

52. Hair dyed in different color: no

53. Sport: None

55. Vacation: I really wanna go to the beach, honestly

56. Pair of trainers: h u h

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: Nothing

58. Drinking: Nothing

59. I’m about to: Draw Bad Cop (I’m pathetic I know)

61. Waiting for: Nothing

62. Want: To give Good Cop a hug

63. Get married: Nope

64. Career: I don’t really know anymore

WHICH IS BETTER:

65. Hugs or kisses: HU G S

66. Lips or eyes: Eyes

67. Shorter or taller: Both I guess

68. Older or younger: Doesn’t matter

70. Nice arms or nice stomach: arms i guess

71. Sensitive or loud: I’m not answering this

72. Hook up or relationship: Neither

73. Troublemaker or hesitant: idk

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a stranger: no

75. Drank hard liquor: no

76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: Yes, I lost my glasses and had to buy a new pair

77. Turned someone down: No

78. Sex on the first date: I AM AN ANXIOUS ACE 

79. Broken someone’s heart: Probably

80. Had your heart broken: Yeah

81. Been arrested: arrest me bad cop No

82. Cried when someone died: Do pets count

83. Fallen for a friend: Nope

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. Yourself: HAHAH N O

85. Miracles: No

86. Love at first sight: Nope

87. Santa Claus: No

88. Kiss on the first date: gun emoji

OTHER:

90. Current best friend name: @sleeqy-uf0s

91. Eye color: Blue

92. Favorite movie: The LEGO Movie

NOW, TAG 20 PEOPLE:

@sleeqy-uf0s is the only one I’m tagging haha

Anyone else who wants to can

[voidandnull404]

Yall I Think I Know Who Killed PD

ok ok so I saw a post on twitter that was talking about the song “Both of You” and how it had a very /specific/ colour palette

hmmm

HMMMMM Now then where have these other colours been known to show up a lot?

oh yeah so now lets look at the lyrics, more specifically lets take stevens lyrics at the beginning and turn him into PD so to say:’

why dont you talk to each other? just give it a try, why dont you talk about what happened? I know youre trying to avoid it but i dont know why... you might not believe it but you have a lot in common you really do! you both love me and i love both of you!”  im going to interpret this to mean that PD when she was still alive acted as a sort of peacemaker between her sisters (wives??? idfk at this point) and the “a lot in common” thing i think holds a lot of ground bc both blue and yellow are very strict about the laws being up held in their society, but seemed to disagree with how to enforce the laws (see: The Trial), causing PD to be their “marriage counselor” if u will BUT THATS NOT THE JUICY BIT MY DUDES See this line from the song in which greg and pearl are talking lets change some names about shall we?: “look if i were you Id hate me too.” “I dont hate you.” “But, I knew how you felt about pink and i stayed anyway. “that wasnt the problem...” “then what was?” “she fell in love with you...”

I think that YD and PD seemed to get along better than BD and PD could, something between them never seemed to click the way it did with PD and YD but that, if youll pardon my pun, shatters the YD killed PD theory doesnt it? and Blue zircon destroyed any remaining idea that it was the rebellion soooo whos left?

thats right, The Giant Blue Gay herself, Blue diamond.  Now I know what youre thinking, then why is she grieving so much? trying to preserve all the memories and artifacts of PD even her rose quartz soilders?? surely if a rose quartz were the cause of Pink’s death wouldnt BD want them to be shattered? its not like she has qualms about that (See: First Garnet Fusion) if they truely killed PD why keep that as a memory? you wouldnt exactly keep the murder weapon of your spouse around to honor them now would you? oh no, I think, in a jealous rage and eons of bottled up emotion one day  BD snapped like pearl in season one where she almost let steven fall to his death because she blamed him for rose being gone. BD snapped and killed Pink Diamond. But it was probably an accident, or at the very least a crime of passion and she immediately regretted what she had done. she killed the one she loved the most because she was jealous of another so she panicked, unsure of what yellow and white would do to her if she found out what they had done, so to cover it up, she found the easiest cop out imaginable the leader of the rebellion those in PDs court who were obvious witnesses (like eyeball probs her pearl etc) they were told never to speak of it for fear theyd be next. the one who killed PD was the rebel rose quartz, end of story. this is why i believe yellow gets so defensive at the trial! zircon literally debiunked what her sister had told her, but instead of letting her sister be called a liar she poofed the zircons so they couldnt speak anymore. the only thing I cant seem to place is why she’d act so shocked at the trial?? and yell at YD for interrupting the trial?? bc you’d think she wouldnt want to be snitched right? the gasp couldve been a play up tho