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benyhw · 4 years ago

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Day 3 - Reflections on emotional maturity

"Wielding sensible arguments can at points be as effective as telling a person with vertigo that the balcony wont collapse or a person with depression that there are perfectly good grounds to be cheerful" A lot of our mind is not amenable to hard-headed logic, not when emotions are involved

Yet, truly facing and understanding our emotions and then still be able to act with some rationality and logic is a testament to emotional maturity. There is more to love, forgiveness, trust than what we think we know.

I am sorry for my hurtful words, said in times of emotional turmoil. I regret my texts and posts, impulsive and raging. I've spent a lot of time reflecting on my actions, your thoughts and feelings and ultimately your decision. The turmoil I initially faced was truly a mixture of shock from how sudden things changed as well as the immense void your disappearance has caused. Given time, I have calmed down and could examine myself deeper on many levels.

I learned that I can be loved and that I can have wants and needs. I learned that my careless acts can hurt even when I don't recognise it at that point of time.

I know my mistakes and can see its damages. I triggered this whole chain of events, rocking what was a seemingly stable relationship. I see that we are flawed, but not un-deserving of love. Our innate reactions and nature is built upon by our past, regardless whether we consciously know it or not. Some traumas and hurt that forms our current insecurities are born from history we may not even remember. Though this doesn't discount our current wrongs, it does help to allow us to understand people better.

I do know, that I can and should listen to what I want and love, not only to that of other's demands or requests. I can be selfish in love and loving. I can earnestly seek forgiveness and then put in action to repent and atone for the wrongs I've made. Yet forgiveness and moving on from the hurt I've caused, is not mine to give or take. It is for me to earn and for you to heal from. I can only do what I believe is best, in terms of my love for you and love for myself. I do feel, we both have a lot to learn in terms of emotional maturity and have ways to go to truly understand what it means to love, to hurt, to trust and to forgive.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YGV5o6UHjxM - Stay in or Leave a Relationship We expect to be deeply happy in love, and, therefore, spend a good deal of time wondering whether our relationships are essentially normal in their sexual and psychological frustrations or are beset by unusually pathological patterns which will impel us to get out as soon as we can. What films or novels we've been exposed to, the state of our friend's relationships, the degree of noise surrounding new sexually driven dating aps, not to mention how much sleep we've had, can all play humbling large roles in influencing us one way or another. How much of our unhappiness can be tightly attributed to this particular partner, and how much might it, as we would risk discovering five years later and multiple upheavals later, turn out to be simply and inherent feature of any attempt to live in close proximity to another human? Try to have another conversation with your partner in which you don't accuse them of mendacity, and instead simply explain, quite calmly, how you actually felt and how sad you are at quite a few things Consider the annoying traits in all previous partners we've had and people we've known, that our current partners happen to not have, what do we manage not to fight about?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oLq1ktogxn4 - What infidelity means There are, of course, many cases where infidelity means exactly what Romanticism takes it to mean: contempt for one’s relationship. But in a great many other cases, it may mean something really rather different: a passing, surface desire for erotic excitement that coexists with an ongoing, sincere commitment to one’s life-partner. The best way to recover after an infidelity may therefore be to ignore what Romanticism tells us that infidelity has to mean, and to consult instead a more reliable source of information: what we ourselves took infidelity to mean the last time the idea crossed through our minds or our lives. It is on this basis that we may – with considerable pain of course – come one day to be able to forgive and even in a way understand and accept the apologies of a repentant partner. It is on the basis of subjective experience of unfaithful thoughts that we may redemptively enrich, complicate and soften what happens when we end up as their victims.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WRaaqN2Atxw - Why We Go Cold On Our Partners Going cold is, in this story, simply the unavoidable consequence of familiarity. he loss of interest isn’t either natural or inevitable. The boredom is something at once more complicated and more active. It exists because we feel hurt by, angry with, or scared of our partner and because we haven’t found a cathartic way to tell ourselves or them about it. Tuning out isn’t inevitable, it’s a symptom of disavowed emotional distress. It’s a way of coping. We’re internally numbed – not just a touch bored. To learn to cope, we need a prominent mutual awareness and forgiveness of this dynamic of sensitivity and distress – and a commitment to decode it when disengagement and indifference descend. When we've gone cold, we may not truly have lost interest in our partners, we might just need an opportunity to imagine that we are quietly really rather hurt and furious with them and we should access to a safe forum in which our tender but critical feelings can be aired, purged and understood without risk of humiliation

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rgQvqi6aYD8 - The Secret of Successful Relationships: Rupture and Repair Repair refers to the work needed for two people to regain each other's trust and restore themselves in the others mind as someone who is essentially decent and sympathetic and can be a good enough interpreter of their needs Repair isn't just one capacity among others, it is arguably the central determinant of one's mastery of emotional maturity Good repair relies on at least 4 separate skills: The ability to apologise The ability to forgive - To do so requires us to extend imaginative sympathy for why good people can end up doing some pretty bad things, not because they are evil but because they are in their varied ways tired or sad, worried or weak. It lends us energy to look around for the most generous reasons why fundamentally decent people can at points behave less than optimally. We cling to rupture because it confirms a story which, though deeply sad at one level, also feels very safe: that big emotional commitments are invariably too risky, that others can't be trusted, that hope is an illusion The ability to teach - They give their listener time and know about defensiveness and as a fallback, accept that they may have to respect two different realities. They can be in the end bear to accept that they will always be a bit misunderstood even by someone who loves them very much The ability to learn - They have a lively and non-humiliating sense of how much they still have to take on board. It isn't a surprise or a cause for alarm that someone might level a criticism at them. Its merely a sign that a kindly soul is invested enough in their development to notice areas of immaturity, and in the safety of a relationship, to offer them something almost no one otherwise even bothers with: feedback.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ci-zID4EAPU - How to deal with trust issues 1. Ask yourself how your reactions line up with reality - The thoughts we may have may not always be an honest perception of what is happening 2. Learn to be non defensive when you communicate - Chances are, people take the time to talk to you because they care about you and not because they want to hurt you 3. Let people know what you need and be direct about it - In order to build trust, you have to be open and honest. People often have trust issues because they are afraid of getting hurt. Trust issues are developed when too much focus is concentrated on the pain, but not enough on overcoming the pain. 4. Give people a chance to show you who they are - Give people time to show you their true colours, and you may be surprised that you can go through challenges well together 5. Practice open-ended conversations that allow disagreements 6. Confront your fears and don't allow them to hold control over you - Remember, you have the power to work through your struggles openly and honestly. You have it in you to connect and build trust with others

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-K5btaxEFY - How to forgive It can be so hard to forgive because – so often – we simply are in the right and the scale of the folly, thoughtlessness and meanness of others seems utterly beyond our own measure. But there are 2 inviolable ideas which should nevertheless, in the face of the grossest behaviour, be kept in mind to increase our changes of being able to forgive: 1. We must remember how the other person got there, to this place of idiocy and cruelty - Every irritating fault in another person has a long history behind it. They became like this because of flaws in their development, which they did not choose for themselves. To forgive is to understand the origins of evil and cruelty 2. There are difficult things about you too - Not in any area remotely connected to the sort of lapses that destroy your faith in humanity. But in some areas, quiet areas that you forget about as soon as you've travelled through them, you too are a deeply imperfect and questionable individual. Gently, you have - in your own way - betrayed. Nicely, you have been a coward. Modestly, you have forgotten your privileges'. Unthinkingly, you have added salt to the wounds of others. We must forgive because - not right now, not over this, but one day, over something - we need to be forgiven too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVeq-0dIqpk - How to build (and rebuild) trust There is 3 facets of trust: Authenticity in actions, Rigor in logic and communicating that logic, True empathy towards the other

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NhyfBi-Ad4c - Loving and Being Loved We start knowing only about being loved. It comes to seem, very wrongly, like the norm. Parent and child may both love, but each party is on a very different end of the axis, unbeknownst to the child This is why adulthood, when we first say we long for love, what we predominantly mean is that we want to be loved as we are once loved by a parent In a secret part of our minds, we picture someone who will understand our needs, bring us what we want, to be immensely patient and sympathetic to us, act selflessly, and make it all better we need to move firmly out of the child and into the parental position of love To be adults in love, we have to learn, perhaps for the very first time, to do something truly remarkable, for a time at least, to put someone else ahead of us.

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I know, making this decision has not been easy on you. You struggled internally alone for 5 weeks before taking the brave step to pursue what you believed was right now. I can only imagine the turmoil you've been put through. I cannot and will not blame you for loving yourself more.

When I look at myself and what I've gone through in the past weeks, I do wonder how you are coping along as well. I do believe in what we had, which meant that these days were probably not as easy on you too as you make it seem. I never imagined that my actions were seen as infidelity to you and that while we know it was not ill-intentioned, the feelings you've felt and the hurt I've caused you are valid.

I hope the above few points and videos can eventually help you to heal and move on, to feel ok enough to love another again some day. I am always here to openly talk about us, about our feelings and about what we each want now or in the future for ourselves. In the past 2.5 years, have you done and said anything to anyone or just innately felt that you would feel afraid to tell me of? Has there ever been any breach of trust on your end or guilt, before my current mistake that made you feel betrayed? I am open, with no judgement or shame, to talk about these, if you are ever willing. I have done you wrong, and I truly have repented. I will never ever breach trust like that ever again, not even at the cost of feeling uncomfortable in sharing how I feel.

I too will love myself, doing my utmost best to pursue things I want and love because they make me happy. It is ok to be selfish in love, something I have learned from you that I am grateful for. Take care, I am only 1 text away

Love, Ben

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bonesandpoemsandflowers · 4 years ago

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Hey! I am asking for advice. I fucked up a few years ago at the telling apart ghosts and gods and would rather not go through that again. Could you help me out? I really want to get back into it but that was a very bad experience so I'm anxious. Thank you!!

Anon, I love this question and if you're willing to drop some more details in my inbox, anon or not, please do. I'm sorry that you had such a bad experience, but take heart, maybe, that everybody does this at SOME point, and taking a few years off to process is actually a pretty snappy turnaround time.

(spooky occult people only pls)

(scroll along, the rest of you)

It IS a tricky question, though.

Tough love up front: there is no entirely safe, entirely pleasant way to do magic. Fundamentally magic is transformative and therefore often uncomfortable. There's fears and negative emotions to work through, and there's also just some straight up tedium and drudgery, and no matter how cool you are, no matter how sure you feel about your place in the grand scheme of the universe, you will eventually question everything and get some things wrong. There will not only always be risk: sooner or later there will be pain.

But! Is it worth it? ABSOLUTELY, anon, and I'm not gonna try to persuade you because if you're asking, you've already made up your mind. You just want to not make the same mistakes over again. You want to make brand new mistakes! It is the only way to move forward.

There is a difference between the merely uncomfortable and the truly dangerous, so ultimately it's a game of knowing when fear is a just a trial to get through versus when fear is a warning keeping you safe. The first time I tried to answer this question I made a quick list of protections, but that's not really the issue. You're wiser than that. You're asking about something diagnostic.

Discernment is the greatest occult skill and one that’s difficult to quantify. It's one of those paradoxes of inexperience, nigh impossible to hone without practice, yet a skill you need in order to get out there and practice.

whatever your prior experience was: what did you learn from it? what was the point where you started to feel something went wrong? identifying that moment, how it felt, how you felt it, will help you more than anything I or anyone else can tell you.

I am, honestly, not the best person to describe how to increase your psychic sensitivity or whatever. The good news, maybe, is that you don't have to be great at discernment before you start. Yes, you can put all your effort into sharpening your senses before you even go out there, which is a noble way of doing it and maybe it will eventually even work, OR—you can put on some safety gear and wade out into the swamp wearing your little floaties so that you don't sink.

Your metaphorical swimming wings here are protections and banishments and the preemptive assistance of something bigger than you on your side. This answer is mostly going to focus on that last part, because "ghosts and gods" implies, I think, that you are ready to work with gods, or at least eager, which is, like, at least half of the process.

However, even then, I do wanna say—while I don't want to discount your negative experiences at all! I don't know anything about them, but I'm sure it was awful!—you, all by yourself, can probably banish most ghostly things you're likely to run into. There's a lotta bark, and usually not that much bite. I wrote up some less formal banishing methods and posted them here on ye old witch blogge, but really, you can mostly just yell at stuff to leave.

(there is a fair amount of repetition between this post and that one! I apologize. I mostly typed these late at night over the course of several days)

Now! Assistance. An ounce of prevention vs a pound of cure and it’s good to pack light.

So much of magic across time and cultures is about negotiating with spirits of some flavor or another. Maybe it's worship or maybe it's bindings or maybe it's strictly transactional, but as beings made of flesh we are forever making pacts with beings made of something else, and hey, it usually works.

The complication here is that the distinction between ghosts and gods maybe isn't that simple. Mess with the wording a little and Catholic saints are basically both. And so are some orisha, some loa, and so on. Baron Samedi (lord of the cemetery, best bang since the big one, etc etc etc) in particular, out of the vodou pantheon, may or may not have been human once, depending on who you ask.

Further: the most readily available spooky occult forces you have are your ancestors. So you'd file that under ghosts, maybe, except that with ancestral veneration practices and all, we inch closer to god territory, in a sense. At least—the rituals start looking the same from an outside perspective. Santeria, Vodou, Epiritismo and many more practices that the ones I'm familiar with involve working with your ancestors to accomplish your worldly goals. We don't consider them ghosts when we work with them; that's not the word we use. But arguably—why not?

So the trick here isn't necessarily how to sort ghosts from gods as much as it is to hang out with some NICE (to you) ghosts and/or gods.

How do you do that?

If you have a good relationship with your ancestors, then you start there. If you, like me, or lots of other long disowned and disinherited magicians, have a disconnect there, then—welp. Consider getting over it by going back further in the family tree (this is what you will inevitably eventually do). Somewhere in there you have someone kind, I promise. But that's not advice I could have followed ten years ago, so I'll get to the alternative in a minute. Let's assume, for the moment, that you accept the logic that your ancestors have a vested interest in protecting their line, and in fact having an active magic user willing to work with them probably makes their afterlives much easier.

There's tons of guides online about how to work with your ancestors. I think sincere, unstructured prayer and a glass of water are the simplest and most powerful of offerings. A candle, if you have one. Just flipping on a lamp or a light switch if you don't.

(I travel with a little LED tealight and a mala made of skull beads carved from ox bone, but I am unnecessarily spooky and dramatic. If anything, my ancestors prefer the plain obsidian mala I first started with. But the aesthetic.)

I'm very, very informal in my ancestral practice. It still works.

Tell them you want to establish a working connection, talk to them about what's going on in your life. Keep it short and don't worry about whether or not you feel anything yet. It might take weeks before you feel something, and that's okay—discernment is, like I've said, the most important but also hardest skill, and it usually takes time and repetition. Offer them something—anything, really, and honestly the plain glass of water is traditional—and ask for their protection. They will almost certainly give it to you.

"But Flowers," you might say. "Fuck that and fuck 'em. I'm not ready to fuck with my family yet."

Alright, little one! I feel ya. It took me ages to warm up to the idea. I promise that it's worth it when you're ready, but having covered ghosts, let's move on to

GODS

Step one: ask yourself if you need to fuck around with gods in the first place.

Step two: fuck around and find out.

Step three varies depending on who you're looking for. There is a great deal of anxiety about this in occult circles, especially among people who use the term "baby witch." People are terrified of making the wrong choice. They want it to be PERFECT. They want to be correct. "Who is calling me?" ask a thousand seekers, across forums and places. "I saw a butterfly the other day. IS IT A SIGN?"

(shit, dude, I dunno, probably not, but potentially maybe. Nobody can know but you. just keep in mind that butterflies etc exist on their own and go around doing their own thing and this has absolutely nothing to do with you the vast majority of the time)

You don't need to be wait to be called by a god to offer worship and/or develop a working relationship. I would argue that most people aren't really called, and if you are, you will KNOW. Tumblr likes to say gods need consent and I think that's fucking hilarious. There is no folkloric precedent for that. If you are Called, capital letter Called, you will know, and whatever happens next is between you whatever bizarre shamanic experience you end up having, because you WILL have it, good luck.

But probably that's not the issue here! Moving on with our hypothetical.

You're not waiting around for divine intervention. You're being proactive. You're not waiting for The Call, or even a mild call. How do you choose what god you're petitioning for protection? I doubt you're entirely neutral about it. You probably have a god you identify with or just find really friggin cool. That's a fine and dandy place to start.

The working relationship need not be forever.

Which brings me to my next point. If you are absolutely undecided about what direction to go in, consider going to one of the liminal gods. Your crossroads gods, your messenger gods, often trickster gods. Your between spaces gods. Your portal opening gods.

In Santeria and Vodou, which I keep on referring back to because those are the systems I was raised in, your messenger gods get called very early on in the ritual. Why? To open the way for everybody else. There's a suggestion here that certain gods are closer or more easily reached, so if you want an opener—ask somebody with keys, yeah?

(also technically there's spirits called before then like the rhythm/dance/drums but let's not complicate things. Broadly speaking: key holding gods first)

Catholic saints wise, you've got Saint Peter, right? Santeria has Elegua. Vodou has Legba. Vodou also has the Baron as a crossroads god and yer liminal spaces god and sometimes he also has keys and hey by the way, he's really great, but where was I?

Hermes is another option. Mercury.

There's a bunch of American indigenous options I don't know enough about to confidently say.

SPEAKING of indigenous american, right, there's always Quetzalcoatl—technically—sky god, wind god, messenger god.

There's Odin and I'm actually a big fan, but the Norse magic community is often kind of garbage these days because we've got too many nazis running around, which is a shame.

My point is: there's gonna be somebody who feels close, either because of your cultural background or your aesthetic, and you might as well ask.

Settle down. Call their name. Offer water and a prayer and ask for protection, tell them what it is you want to do, ask for their help on this new life journey.

Worship isn't really complicated unless you want it to be.

Again, don't worry about "feeling" anything. Don't expect anything dramatic. Just offer something, every day or every week or whenever you have the time and headspace for it. Do the motions and mean it even a little bit and with time the rest shall come.

Because EVENTUALLY, you will feel something. It will probably be a mild sense of peace. The ritual feels calming. Something about it feels cozy. Presence is often subtle, but that counts.

Once you feel solidly good about your ritual, I would say that means you have at least some degree of protection, and it's time to wade around the swamp and see what's up. What do you do next? I dunno! I don't know what your goals are! But you have your ancestors at your back, or you're on a god team, or maybe BOTH—go explore!

Confidence isn't everything. But confidence, my friend, is a LOT. There's more to it, of course, but especially early on: fake it till you make it and dream it and you'll be it.

Best of luck, anon. <3

#ask box #occult only pls thx

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aurora-daily · 6 years ago

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BCharts interviews Aurora: check out the interview and message for the "Pocs from BC tcharts"

Interview: Aurora for the BCharts forum by Rony translated by fromthespaceamundo. (April 29th, 2019)

A month ago we opened a topic asking you to send questions because we were suggested to make an interview with Aurora, who will perform here in Brazil next month, doing a show in São Paulo on Saturday 18th.

We received the answers and a super cute video from the Norwegian singer exclusively for us (watch it in the end of the post). Enjoy and leave a nice comment in retribution, my friends.

Are there any Brazilian artists on your radar? I mean, does any Brazilian inspire you and make you want to make a collaboration?

I'll try to find someone to collaborate with. [Portuguese] is a beautiful language, so I would not mind collaborating on some music in my own language or writing some parts of the song in Portuguese.

When you were younger who was your greatest inspiration? Has the lyrical message of any artist encouraged you to perform on stage?

I loved classical music and Enya a lot. I also really liked Leonard Cohen and heavy metal as well.

How do you feel being one of the biggest voices for those who are dealing with problems like anxiety and depression?

Music really saves lives, and I feel honored to know that people use my music as a companion when they need it. I feel that the purpose of music is to help people with emotions that we find difficult to explain. Being human is difficult. So I'm really happy that I can somehow make it a little easier.

What would be your message to new artists who are struggling to make their music happen?

Believe in yourself. Do whatever you want to do. Follow your instinct and your intuition and you're done.

Many Billie Eilish fans think your voices match. Would you collaborate with her?

I do not think it will happen very soon, no. I am currently feeling very intense and full of energy and fury and emotions, and I feel that now she is softly whispering words in our ears, while I am screaming them. I've whispered a lot in my music before but I'm heading towards a more energetic environment, and that's a lot of fun!

What song do you enjoy singing live the most at your shows? And why?

Sometimes I love to sing "Runaway" because I'm feeling sensitive and homeless. I have some songs about murder and fear, also playful stories about strangers and characters, and when I'm feeling playful, songs like "In Bottles" and "Running With The Wolves" are really cool to play. Currently "The Seed", the new single, is my favorite, for being a hymn to the planet, and I feel so strong and so connected singing it.

Soap operas are like, culturally speaking, one of the greatest pastimes of Brazilians. More than a year ago you were invited to collaborate with a production called "God Save the King" ("Deus Salve o Rei") where you made a cover of the song "Scarborough Fair", which would be the opening theme song of the novel. Do you think about working on more soundtracks?

Maybe…? Maybe not…?

Do you intend to release albums in Norwegian language? Just as Céline Dion has her career split into English and French? You also said that in your new "Infections of a Different Kind" era you would have at least one song in Norwegian; there is no song in your native language in Step 1, is it supposed to be in Step 2 or did you leave it aside?

It should not happen on this step yet. I have some songs with little excerpts in my native language. But Norwegian songs are not in this step.

AURORA, your last EP gives me the idea of a silent revolt (or a promise for a revolt), especially "It Happened Quiet". On the same album you say "don't you know that we're all turning softer inside?" Do you consider yourself optimistic about the future?

I am optimistic because having hope means that you believe that the things we do to help effectively help. And without hope there would be no reason even to try, would it? So I'm optimistic but also realistic. Because we have to do everything we do to reverse the human behavior that has been destructive to the planet Earth. Respecting animals and respecting each other. We have time to learn, and, I think, the offspring of the next generations will do it productively.

What song of another artist would you like to have composed/created?

Sometimes I wish I had written "May It Be" by Enya, a song that features on the Lord of the Rings soundtrack. And I love the Beatles' "Tomorrow Never Knows".

Thanks to all the members who have collaborated and interacted on the topic by sugesting questions <3 and affectionately to @lovely4.26, @couture!, @jusuxx, @Loggie, @Maarcelo, @AngeloBruno, @Douglas_Perry, @Matheus D and @Leonardo Ribeiro, who got their questions answered.

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A post shared by BCharts (@bchartsnet) on Apr 29, 2019 at 2:53pm PDT

#aurora #aurora aksnes #interviews #step 1

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ollyarchive · 6 years ago

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Olly Alexander Is Leaning Into The Gay Thing

BY: PHILLIP HENRY 10 NOV 2018

“I started to hear people referring to me as ‘that gay singer’ and a part of ‘that gay band,’ and I said to myself ‘You know what? I am.’ I decided to lean into the gay.”

English actor, pop star, and frontman of the synth-pop band Years & Years Olly Alexander has found himself growing more and more comfortable with his sexuality as it relates to his artistry. Having just released the band’s sophomore album, Palo Santo, this summer, Alexander says he found himself embracing his identity, and “the multifaceted nature of it.”

“You know, inside I’m still kind of this scared gay boy that got bullied at school,” he tells INTO. “But having the kind of response we got from audiences and success that we had after the first album, I felt more comfortable, confident, and okay being more explicit.”

At the age of 28, has been out publicly as long as Years & Years has existed, ignoring the advice of his media trainer who encouraged him to keep his sexuality out of public persona.

And Palo Santo is a reflection of that; the album takes a more direct route when addressing his sexuality, using more male-specific pronouns in the lyrics in comparison to the band’s first album, Communion. Alexander has also been much more free in discussing his sexuality, advocating for HIV screenings, promoting safer sex practices and even supporting anti-LGBTQ bullying campaigns.

Seated in the corner of a New York cafe wearing a Rihanna T-shirt and lounge pants, Alexander’s confidence and charisma exude a certain type of energy that grows as he speaks about the things he loves with such candor.

In just a few hours, Alexander would be performing a sold-out show at Terminal 5. He’s grateful for where he is, sharing thoughtful sentiments as he talks about his fans and his work. He knows that at this point in time, when so many queer people have the wind in their face, right now, it’s at his back and he can soar brightly into the future.

As the main songwriter and leading visionary for Year & Years, Alexander is pushing himself not only as an artist but also as a public-facing advocate.

“Obviously, the UK is stuff I’m most familiar with, but globally we’re all kind of witnessing this dumpster fire descent to Hell,” he says. “Though, I don’t always think it’s that bad.”

“Personally,” he continues, “I didn’t ever imagine I’d be engaging in advocacy the way that I have, but I just find it so meaningful. It makes me feel like I have a purpose in life. Getting out of bed and feeling like you’re working to create positive change is a good feeling.”

One of the hallmarks of poor advocacy is arrogance, a self-centeredness Alexander seems hellbent on avoiding. Being a white gay man comes with a lot of privileges, and he is aware of that, referencing it often as a limitation of his own worldview. He’s chipping away at the underpinnings of our how oppression operates with a precision and consciousness you might not expect from someone who had been cast in an Academy Award-nominated film before being old enough to to vote, acting alongside Dame Judi Dench (“a naughty grandma who only drinks champagne,” he says of his one-time co-star) in his early twenties before launching his international music career. Still, he notes, “This [advocacy] has been a journey for me and I’m still learning every day.”

“There are so few queer people taking up space in media or in a public forum and I feel like there is a responsibility to use it properly, because people are listening to what you say and so many people aren’t being listened to,” Alexander says. “Silence is complicity. You have to come with something.”

He seems exasperated by the idea that everyone isn’t working to liberate others from their struggles.

“We can’t really step outside all of society’s rules and things that govern us anyway. Like white patriarchy, just because we’re gay that doesn’t go away. We have all the same structural oppressions that exist outside of that. We’ve chosen to band together because we’ve had to and there are so many benefits to that, but we’re so diverse and it makes us ripe for conflict.”

Right now, Alexander is concerned about the Gender Recognition Act in the UK, a proposed reform of the act that will make it easier for trans folks to self-identify.

“It’s created this insane hysterical discourse in the UK media and public. It has been a full-on assault on trans people in a way that’s so horrifying. It’s front page news in the media every day.” Alexander says. He likens it to the fear-mongering that gay people have gone through in the past. He wants to use his privilege to do everything he can to help.

It’s not all just talk for Alexander, who’s well aware that change doesn’t come through just bloviating on platforms to crowds who already espouse your beliefs, but through action that helps others be heard. He’s working alongside other public figures including Sir Patrick Stewart to pay the travel costs of UK citizens who want to attend the march that will be calling for a referendum on the final Brexit deal. Those in opposition to Brexit, which has been scrutinized heavily by many for it’s classist and xenophobic motivations, have been advocating for a second vote on the plan, confident that the majority of citizens don’t really support it.

“We can hide behind this kind of veneer of sending a tweet or retweeting someone’s post or saying ‘I’m woke,’” he says. “But are we really doing the work?”

Behind that motivated and eager passion for change is a gay man still exploring facets of his sexuality with zero fear and even less shame. He giggles in excitement with a “Yay” as he reads over my list of topics filed under “GAY SEX STUFF.”

“I use Grindr now, but I didn’t use it in my early twenties because I was going out and meeting men at clubs and hooking up that way,” he says. “Then I was in a couple of monogamous relationships, so I thought it was gonna be weird, but also a sort of initiation [into modern gay culture].”

That fear didn’t stop him from pursuing that desire to meet men for hookups and fun. “I’ve managed to hook up a couple of times through [apps], but it’s difficult because it’s hard to establish trust,” Alexander says. “People are like ‘Are you using a fake picture?’ or ‘Are you really Olly Alexander?’ And that becomes less sexy. I’m also not about to send a dick pic.”

Being a celebrity in a digital dating culture surely has its struggles, but he’s found that Grindr’s utility serves as a comfort for him in a different way.

“I like to open it up just to see that there other gay people around me, because I travel quite a lot. Sometimes [just so] that gay people are so visible to each other,” Alexander says. “We’ve created networks to find each other.”

In these kinds of social networks, queer people also find ourselves shaping the way we view each other and ourselves. Alexander finds the apps to be a place where so much time can be wasted just soaking up the attention and he isn’t above the kind of validation that connections made through such apps can provide.

“It’s like a dopamine hit when someone likes you or sends you a nice comment and I really understand how that feels good, but then following that up seems like hard work,” he says. “Then you’re like, ‘Oh, but what about someone else?’ It becomes this sort of endless appetite for sexual desires and I think that’s kind of changed the way we view intimacy. I don’t know if it’s for better or worse, but it’s definitely made some interactions harder.”

He’s not wrong. The apps can soak up so much time for those who love being bombarded with validation, but it’s not true for everyone. While it has made access to the type of intimacy that gays had to “work harder” to get in the past easily accessible, for many people, it provides a space where they can feel more confident than in the crowded and judgmental spaces that are gay bars and clubs. Also, perhaps, it’s just highlighted the way we’ve viewed intimacy all along.

His growth and journey with intimacy have changed over the years. He speaks as someone who wants his relationships to be as progressive as his politics. Unsatisfied with the idea that gay relationships need to fit cultural norms, Alexander discusses his most recent open relationship as a challenge that turns him on more than causes him fear.

“It presents a different set of challenges than you experience in a monogamous relationship,” he says. “In a monogamous relationship, you have like one rule which is: don’t cheat, basically. In an open one you literally write the rulebook yourself, so you have to communicate with your partner a kind of endless list of potentially hard to talk about topics. Who are you allowed to sleep with? How many times? Are you allowed to see them more than once? Is anal okay? Is it just oral?”

Aroused by the idea of these difficult topics that many people would find a hassle to breach over and over, he thinks the ideas difficult to talk about in an open relationship greatly outweigh the simplicity of establishing monogamous trust. His light fetish seems to be emotional masochism that leads to self-discovery.

“In lots of ways, confronting those issues with someone and being able to get into the nitty-gritty of things, you have to go into some really emotionally intense and raw places,” Alexander says. “Those kinds of feelings are what make them more of fit for me than something monogamous which isn’t quite right for me. I’m glad I did it, because I learned a lot about myself and how I deal with aspects of intimacy.”

Olly Alexander is an explorer, expanding his boundaries and expectations. He speaks openly about his love of daddy porn, smiling in recognition of the cliche. Alexander is curious and demanding of the content he consumes. “[All I want] is for the people to look like they’re enjoying it and for their dicks to be hard,” he says. “Obviously, whoever is fucking their dick is gonna be hard, but if someone is being fucked, I also want them to have a hard dick. Maybe I’m wrong. I’m sure they might still be enjoying it, but when I’m doing it I’m hard. I just like to see both people turned on.”

For Olly Alexander, sex as a gay man should be free of shame and be easier to talk about. He opens up about a sexual experience gone awry: “I guess a lot of people in the US are circumcised but most people in the UK aren’t.” He uses his hands to demonstrate how the frenulum (colloquially called a “banjo string)” is attached to the penis.

“One night, I was in the hotel with my boyfriend and we were having sex. I fell off the bed and basically tore this string right off,” he recalls. “ It was like a crime scene in the hotel. Obviously, like my dick was erect and had so much blood rushing to it so it was like fountains of blood squirting everywhere.”

Alexander and his partner at the time ended up in an emergency room shortly thereafter where his attending nurse recognized him and began talking about his music. Even in that awkward circumstance, he manages to be so excited that someone knows and loves his music.

They should love his music. It’s incredible in its range but most impressive in storytelling. The performance later that night is electric — the audience hanging onto every word and Alexander consuming every bit of that energy. It’s as if without it, he’d be incapable of finishing the performance.

In a sheer white leotard, shiny black pants, and large bedazzled necklace that borders on gaudy, Alexander leads the audience through Palo Santo. Alexander’s voice rings throughout the three-story concert hall filled with young queers belting every lyric to the band’s hit single “If You’re Over Me.” He leads the audience and his bandmates through an electrifying set, running around with a rainbow flag he was gifted from a front-row audience member.

“I just want everyone having a good time,” he tells the crowd.

They absolutely are.

Images via Getty

#olly alexander #years & years #yearsandyears #articles #interviews #magazine #magazines

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princess-miabug-blog · 6 years ago

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My Little Me

I’m a little overwhelmed because there seem to be so many rules and acronyms and titles for stuff that I’m not entirely in the know with. But I’m here because I know some people use Tumblr to express themselves and their little sides. So, here’s the thing, I’m gonna do my best to get used to this and learn stuff, but if you’re a jerk to me I’ll just figure out how to block you. I don’t deal with jerks.

So here’s some basics about me, I dunno what the best term is here because I’m not into nothin’ adult at all when I’m in my little space. I dunno if Little is the right term or what everyone seems to have their own variations of definitions and frankly labels are annoying. So instead I’m just gonna talk a little about me. If you don’t like the way I do that, tough.

My little age is 2 years old, and her name is Mia. We used to roleplay on Second Life a lot, That has been the only forum really where we’ve been able to be little. So this is all new, but I have no intentions of being taken advantage of, used mistreated or manipulated. We’ve been hurt by a lot of Second Life parents, and had a whole lot of real world stuff happen that was crazy and hard over the past few years, so we drifted away from letting Mia be in little brain, things were too heavy.

So I joined Tumblr in the hopes of getting reacquainted with my little self, to hopefully meet other nice littles, hopefully make some friends, and maybe to help myself find a Daddy. I guess this is where I explain the things I’m looking for.

In a Daddy -

First off, I’m not looking for a partner, relationship, date, romance, or anything sexual. I’m looking for someone who wants to love me for who I am, purely platonic, parental only, love.

I’m looking only for an online connection, the reality is that feelings can change, but I can’t and won’t guarantee that they will or they won’t, but I do not want to be pressured over it. One day at a time.

I’m looking for real, open, honest - even if it’s hard, communication. Lying to me will throw up my walls and I will retreat. Trust is HUGE, and hard for me, I really want it, and need it, but getting there isn’t easy for me, so if it gets damaged, it’s over.

I want someone who will ask me about my day, who will read me stories, who will roleplay with me and treat me little, but someone who will talk to me and listen to me and work with me on things I do and do not feel comfortable with. I need someone who understands boundaries and will respect them, as I will respect theirs. I need someone who I can depend on to be there when things are really hard, but also when things are happy and good. Someone who will plan things as a Daddy, and pay attention to my efforts, give praise, etc.

The no no’s, breaking trust, manipulating, controlling or dominating. I have past trauma, so when it comes to things like rules etc I’m a good girl, but sometimes I make mistakes, test limits,or try to push myself out of old hardwired roles, I need to feel like I have safe choices. This is huge for me. It’s something we would have to talk about topic by topic, if you can compromise with me I will do my best to do the same, so long as it doesn’t cross a personal boundary. I respect that there will be hard NO lines, and I need my Daddy to respect my hard No lines as well. PLEASE please please please stay away from me if you have any interest in sexual interaction /romantic interaction with me as my little, that will ALWAYS be a no, never. There’s a whole lot more, but that stuff takes time and getting to know each other to get through, so for now I’ll leave that there.

In friends -

Non sexual, don’t care your gender, your preferences, your, color, ages etc. I DO care if you are toxic, controlling, manipulative and unable to let your adult brain manage things if you get to a hard place. being a little for me is no excuse to treat people poorly or not do your best to communicate, it might not be easy but I need people to not come at me kicking biting scratching or screaming if they are dealing with emotions. I will not tolerate abuse in ANY form. Friends do not treat each other that way and I won’t treat you that way either. Don’t push your viewpoints on me and I won’t push mine on you, have your opinions and share them that’s fine, I will too, but it stops there and if it gets aggressive, hurtful, or rude I will walk away. I like RP, and rping playtime is neat, it makes me use my imagination, but sometimes it’s hard for me to get there. I used to love roleplaying making stuff in the kitchen, of course that gets messy so I don’t do that in the real world because I have to clean it up and I don’t wanna do that! But it’s fun to “make cupcakes” with random (pretend) items and let the little sneak out. I would love to get back in touch with the rp imagination and little side, play pirates, plan parties, tea with stuffies, jump in puddles, play with matchbox cars, dress up and roll in the grass, etc.

That’s a start, now more about Mia/us

I see Mia as a separate part of me that is little, but she’s also very much part of me, so we’re not disonnected.

Mia/We do not wear diapers or pull ups. Mia in RP ONLY would MAYBE like to rp potty training and pull up overnight with the right person who she explicitly trusts not to make her feel bad or weird about any aspect of it. We have NO desire at all to actually wear or use them in the real world, and won’t ever do that.

Mia sometimes uses a binky, but not often as they bother our mouth and we worry about our teeth.

We did have a sippy cup but it got cracked, so no more. She’s 2, and we’ve thought about bottle use, but haven’t ever, so it’s a maybe

Mia LOVES being able to see herself as little and wear little clothes in the world of Second Life, because we can not wear little little clothes in the real world, the expense is too great, and I think that’d make the adult side feel awkward and ashamed. However, we do own some onesie pajamas, and fun socks and animated character pajama bottoms that we love, and some animated character t-shirts, but dressing little little is not possible for our real world times. So if a Daddy were willing, we would LOVE to have time to play and roleplay in Second Life, that would be HUGE.

She also LOVES using her voice morpher to sound really little, her little voice is really adorable we think, so being able to use it through discord or Second life would also be HUGE for us.

Things Mia loves

Purple, but it is a very particular purple, it can’t look PINK to her because she hates pink, she says pink will give you the pinklepox!

hippos, puppies, and other animals

shortalls with tutus

going barefoot

dressing up fancy and then goin puddle stompin

stars

candy! She’s a picky eater though, and that even applies to being picky about candy.

crafty things, makin stuff! She LOVES to make homemade things for gifts, especially when the big people in her life LOVE them and appreciate them, even if they are terrible.

being read to

slow back scratches shape drawing, or tickles, you can knock her out to sleep like that.

I gotta take a break, that’ll be it for right now I’ll try and add more later <3

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ajordanart-blog · 6 years ago

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Blog #10:Relationships with Pain

Let’s talk about relationships real quick. Chronic illness can be isolating. It is so easy to feel alone in your battles, and in many ways we do have to make a lot of efforts and growth on our own. There are many ways in which chronic illness can make relationships so much harder than they would be without it factored in, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth it to build relationships and trust others. We don’t have to feel alone in our battles, and we do have several places that we can reach out to for support. No one can make the illness go away, and it is our job to make sure we find healthy ways to cope with our problems-- be it mental or physical health related. I started my journey with chronic pain feeling extremely alone. The doctors couldn’t tell me what was wrong, every sign pointed to “you’re healthy, there are no issues,” and it really felt like people were telling me it was all in my head. I wanted to talk about it, but I struggled to articulate why it was hard to get up and do the things I needed to do, why I was late all of the time, and why I didn’t know how to adjust to it yet. The labels lazy and irresponsible were starting to cling to me even though I still had an extremely strong work ethic. I just also had a severe amount of fatigue pulling me back. I was carrying around a heavy weight that continued to grow, and I did not know what to do with it, and it was taking an emotional toll. I also fed into the myth that sharing my issues and frustrations with pain would be a burden for others, so it was better left alone, which is entirely false. There are ways to communicate your frustrations that are healthy for both parties. And truthfully, part of being a good friend means being there for them. There’s nothing wrong with asking for help or asking if someone has the time to listen, especially if you’re willing to reciprocate that and show them the same kind of support whenever they need it. Knowing your resources and knowing your support systems are so important in being able to continue to stay healthy and continue throughout your day-to-day lifestyle. I have several support systems now, but they wren’t always around in the beginning or in the ways that I needed. And I didn’t always know how to communicate how I was feeling either, which gave me more trouble with getting help or even just helping those close to me understand what exactly it was that had been going on. (It definitely didn’t help that my doctors couldn’t easily explain it to me either, so you can see why this in general was just a big mess for a while on my end.) And “support system” doesn’t have to exclusively mean people who understand or who can offer helpful advice or solid solutions. It definitely factors in sometimes, but a good support system can be found in someone who is just there to hang out, keep you company, and remind you to have fun. So here’s a general list of people who have helped and supported me in ways I didn’t fully expect going into this. Family:

Family can be an incredibly helpful resource if you’re lucky enough to have that. And honestly, for the past 3 years, family is one of the support systems that has simultaneously been the most gratifying but also one of the ones that I struggled the most with, all the way out to my extended family. I’ve had family members tell me I’m faking it or exaggerating, that I’m not trying hard enough, that my fatigue and sheer exhaustion was just laziness, telling me that everyone experiences some aches and pains sometimes and to suck it up, and it was honestly just wearing me down. I had to learn to let go of those opinions. That if this is how anyone felt about me, even if they were family, they were wrong, and it was their problem if they didn’t want to accept my limits and let me accommodate for my own health. I knew my work ethic, i knew I wasn’t lazy, and I knew no one else had the same problems that I did at my age. I cared the most about my immediate family though. Truthfully, my dad didn’t want there to be anything wrong with me, and I looked healthy, so he struggled to accept that I am in debilitating pain often, and that I need to accept my limits, be honest about them, and pace myself, instead of just blindly pushing through these barriers like how he’s apt to do. But he’s also been there to make sure I have access to doctors appointments and the general healthcare that’s been helpful in trying to find solutions to this issue, and over time he’s gotten better about listening and accepting some of the harder stuff that comes with it. (Partially thanks to my mom.) My mom has been the BIGGEST support. She’s didn’t fully understand the problem at first either, for similar reasons to my dad: I’m young and I appear healthy, and I’m her baby, so she didn’t want anything to be wrong. But she was able to begin to accept it so much quicker because she experiences a lot of the same things that I do, but for different reasons. She’s been my advocate for so long and has helped me research issues, look for doctors, and find solutions. She’s honestly just been a great and understanding companion as well. Her issues stem from osteoarthritis, but we carry pain in similar areas. Mine are just more nerve related, and honestly, it’s nice to have someone who on any scale just kind of gets it. We’re able to in a sense compare notes, talk about what helps, what doesn’t help for both of us, and take turns helping each other out on bad pain days.

Friends:

There’s that old saying: you can’t choose your family, but you can choose your friends. And I have made many friends in my adult life who have been great, positive influences in not only how I deal with chronic illness, but also in how I treat myself. I have definitely made some draining and un-supportive “friends” along the way and have had to learn how to distance myself from them, but over time, even those friendships became learning experiences. I knew what not to look for in friends and the people who I surround myself with daily. But my best friends are the people I learn from and grow with daily and are honestly who I am most thankful for. My best friends from high school were the first to accept my health issues without pushing back. They were the first to really listen, and even if they didn’t understand, just hearing “I’m sorry dude. But these are your strengths and you’ve got this,” was so helpful. I think a majority of my friends either struggle with mental health or some form of chronic illness. Two of my more recent close friends struggle with chronic pain, one with migraines who is just as affected by weather as I am, and one who is in a similar boat with weird fluctuating symptoms, and more than a year’s worth of doctors appointments that lead to “normal” test results. And again, it is so nice to have people around and compare notes with what helps and what doesn’t help. And, I suppose sometimes misery loves company, but truthfully I think we all have used our problems as an outlet to learn the kind of patience and understanding it takes to help us all be aware of each others strengths and limitations and where we need to encourage one another or meet in the middle.

The same is true for my boyfriend. He’s been one of my best friends for the past seven years and he’s been a major help and support for me to learn how to accommodate for and manage my pain. He’s been there through all the frustration, tears, and just sheer agitation, and has met it with a tremendous amount of acceptance, patience, and understanding. Like genuinely, I am so lucky to have anyone who would even remotely be willing to offer that. I honestly never advocate for people who are struggling to seek out a significant other, because there’s a HUGE misconception that having a S/O will solve your problems. It doesn’t. But having someone in your life who knows you well, knows your strengths, and knows what you’ve been through is extremely comforting. At least in this situation, I’m including Matt as one of my supportive best friends, because, especially in regards to my health, I care way more about the friend aspect of our relationship.

Pets:

Okay I know this sound silly, but having a pet has been one of the most helpful things in regards to dealing with my pain. I learn from my rabbit every day. She makes me step outside of myself. Taking care of her and having her company is just so therapeutic. It can be inconvenient at times. Like, cleaning out her litter box can be an sever struggle when I’m flaring up pretty bad, same with refilling her hay box and doing any kind of bigger work, but it’s not anything that’s not worth sacrificing for her, and I can usually manage. She doesn’t offer any advice for my health issues, and she can’t technically listen to or understand my problems, but sometimes we don’t need complex solutions or understanding to feel better. Sometimes we just need company.

Online Communities:

If you don’t have anyone else, online communities can be a HUGE help in connecting with others. Especially others like yourself. One of the biggest helpful tools I’ve stumbled across is a Facebook Group. It’s is a smaller group of people all over the globe who each deal with various chronic illnesses who also love fashion and self-expression. It’s an open forum to ask questions, to make self expression posts, to vent, to encourage each other, and to get help with some of the harder issues, because chances are, someone in the group has had a similar struggle. I recently had to ask about barometric pressure changes and if the affect anyone else, and how to deal with the weather as it comes, because it’s something I personally still struggle with, and some of the solutions and affirmations that came from asking truly helped.

(Name and profile pic is blocked out for the privacy of the user.) Yourself:

You are your biggest support system. If all else fails, and trust me, I’ve been there, you have to learn how to rely on yourself. If all we do is tear ourselves down, we have no way of helping ourselves back up. We need to make sure that daily we are making a point to build ourself up long-term so that we have a good foundation for our more difficult days. We need to make sure that we are putting in the work, time, and effort to take care of ourselves, understand ourselves, accept our problems and quirks, work on them as best as we can, and help ourselves every day. That way, when there are hard days, even when no one else is available, you have something within yourself to pull from to pick yourself back up. We can either be our own worst enemy or our best friend. That’s something that, regardless of any of these other relationships and resources, we are in control of and we can always improve on. Overall: Seek out relationships that are healthy. Engage within them as healthily as you can! But most importantly, seek out a good relationship with yourself. Support systems often feel like everything, so it’s important that we invest in them whenever we can! Seeking out support systems is one of the many ways we can encourage ourselves to stay resilient!

#chronic illness #chronic pain #chronic fatigue #fibroymalgia #support systems #my support system #stay resilient #the art of being resilient #lifestyle blog

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universal-kitty · 6 years ago

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1, 2, 3, 6, 8, 11, 13, 15, 16, 18, 23, 25, 28, 29, 32, 35, 36, 38, 40, 46, 48, 50 and 51 for any of your Platonic f/O's!! Maybe multiple because I asked so many whoops ajsndnfjf (@hardcoresshippingmyself)

Another Platonic Self Ship Ask Meme@hardcoresshippingmyself1. Do you have a secret greeting/handshake?2. What’s your favorite inside joke?

THAT…. REALLY IS A LOT…….but I did burn through a BUNCH of the new BnHA eps, so maybe tis a good time to talk about my good son….

Izuku Midoriya!!!! So I’ll answer all these questions with him!! To start… We do not have a secret greeting! Mostly cause neither of us have…considered that. (Now I’m feeling we should.) I mostly give him hugs! I may also teach at U.A., but……. I am also prone to favoritism, just like the rest of the staff, HAH.

Our favorite inside joke… I suppose it’s chanting “banana, banana…” Why? How this became a thing?!? …….That’s why it’s an inside joke. ;> It’s very silly, I’ll admit to that much.

3. What is your favourite sleepover activity?

Well, teachers don’t usually have sleepovers with the students….but what Aizawa doesn’t know I do won’t kill him! I usually regale him and the other 1-A kids about my heroic exploits. I even opened up a little on what it’s like to grow up with a villain parent, so I try to be a bit of an eye-opener that way.

The stories are the better part of the night, though. I get super into reenacting them!!

6. What’s the most embarrassing thing you’ve done together?

….Tried to prank Aizawa together and getting caught. Scolded, too. It’s one thing when it’s rowdy kids, but for a teacher to get into the spirit of pranks….. Sorry, Midoriya…

8. Who is more likely to get into a fight defending the other?

We both are defensive of the other, but it depends on the topic. Izuku gets more angry when he overhears people talking down of me due to my father, a villain. (Distrust of my background, as you do.) I get angry and worked up when it’s someone talking shit about him. (I’ve learned restraint with Bakugo, the mouthy kid…but anyone else? These paws are rated E FOR EVERYONE!)

I try to be the level-headed adult, but that’s not always guaranteed… [siiiiiighhh]

11. What do your texts/letters to each other usually consist of?

Something like this.

13. What’s your best memory together?

Heh, aside from meeting that kid? (He’s a little treasure HONESTLY, just ask Toshi next Takeover; I’ve cried over Izuku before.) I guess it would be when Toshinori and I invited him and his mother out for a picnic! I thought it’d be a nice way to all hang out together, meet up with her again, and just…have a nice day with good food.

It was wonderful.

15. How do you help each other cope with your trauma?

I’m there for him as much as possible, to make sure these things aren’t effecting him too badly. Being in such…early situations of danger can really mess with a person. I’d know; it’s not like dad’s villainy was a secret after I was born. He was never really a danger, but I felt it on him.

And being a pro hero? Taxing, emotionally. People can not realize that…. So I check up on him sometimes to make sure he’s okay and knows that he can tell me anything. In return, that bright smile cheers me up. I’ve told him as much; I may have depression, but it always feels better when he smiles. He really is like Toshi in that way…….

16. Do either of you have an item of clothing you wear that used to belong to the other? (Eg. You stole their jacket and they let you keep it)

Ahh, no! He’s too smol for me and it’d be weird. Though…. Not a wear item, but he did ask what happened to some of my older stuff from my younger hero days… I let him keep an old collar from my school days, since it collects dust and I thought he’s appreciate a trinket like that.

I hear it’s stationed around a figure of All Might, these days…..

18. What do you both do that annoys each other?

For Deku… Well, early on I got annoyed by how much he got hurt. Less anger, more a sort of panic and concern that bubbled into other emotions, you know? It’s reckless behavior and…I just didn’t want him to be lethally hurt, but he always tempted fate….. Now that he’s getting better at controlling One for All, I’m relaxing a bit more, but…yeesh. Otherwise, I love the kid.

Ditto with him to me. Once the news leaked my dad was a villain, things…blew up for awhile. They’re still not perfect. Yet when things started calming down, I took it upon myself to still get involved in issues, saving people left and right to prove to them (and even myself, in a way) that I’m still a hero. Deku got fussy with me for the same reasons and overexerting myself when I didn’t need to.

…He’s a good kid.

23. If you have a romantic f/o how do they react to them? Do they know them? Do they get along?

HAHA, OH BOY. GLAD YOU ASKED…. Fanboy to the highest degree. Me being related to a villain? Whatever. Learning that I was dating his hero, however…? Izuku went over the moon. We’d never made our relationship public and had no intention to, but that kid was one of the first to know.

….And the first major fanboy we were ever going to get, let’s be real. I wouldn’t be surprised if he became an avid shipper on some forum to talk about it… Ehehehe~

25. If one of you gets injured how does the other react? (And during the healing process do they hover or only occasionally check in?)

I freak out over Izuku on the daily, so you know I’m hovering wherever I’m allowed to be until he’s awake again. Y’know, considering most of his injuries end up being LIFE THREATENING….. Eugh. If it’s a smaller thing, I make sure it’s not too bad, deal with it, we’re good… With only minor hovering to make sure it’s not bothering him too much.

On the reverse, he tries to hover, but school keeps him busy. He visits when he can, I appreciate the company, and he usually goes right back to melting when Toshi stops in, too.

28. Have you ever accidentally referred to them as your sibling/parent? What was their reaction?

I have most assuredly called him my son before. At this point, he has two moms and Toshi is his dad. I am absolutely okay with this. (Inko got a laugh out of it when I told it to her later, too!)

29. Who gives who piggybacks when they’re tired? Who carries the other in general?

I’m the big, strong adult here! I carry the boy! ….Though he’s really getting harder to carry with all that muscle he’s been gaining… Yeesh, kid! They really grow up too fast, huh?

32. If they see you getting uncomfortable in a conversation will they intervene and give you a chance to get out of said conversation or will they let you deal with it yourself?

He rushes over, immediately. Unless it seems like not a good idea. Then he quickly gets Toshinori, instead. OR texts him to get over there, immediately, and proceeds to stall for time.

Either way, I’m about to be protected and…..I kinda need it. People are too much for me, sometimes…!

35. Have you ever built something together?

Mostly Lego stuff! It’s a struggle, but a nice way to relax with a friend and hang out with hilarious frustrations over pieces. Iida tries to help on occasion and we’ve learned he’s much better at getting that sort of thing done than we are.

36. If you were stranded on an island together what would happen?

We’d be the best fuckin’ survivors of all time! Cat quirk and One for All….. We’d dominate and surely get home in no time.

38. Do you quote vines/memes/musical lyrics to each other and laugh as everyone else has no idea what you’re both saying? What’s your favorite thing to quote together?

OH, I quote Vines and memes ALL THE TIME with the class!!! I enjoy it because Aizawa largely disapproves (and understands nothing; he’s a cat video man) and Toshi is thrice as baffled.

“Road work ahead? Uh, yeah, I sure hope it does!” is our favorite. Right next to “I’m just cooking pizza.”

40. What’s the most embarrassing photo they have of you and vice versa?

His is a picture he caught of Toshi and I hugging in the breakroom. I mean, he got a good shot and it’s sweet, in a way, but also….!! DEKU, PLEASE– (To my knowledge, he still has that to this day.)

My personal favorite is when he slipped on a banana peel and all you see in the picture is wide eyes of fright and a blue of green and grey. I was laughing so hard that day!!! Still my favorite to look back on.

46. When you’re both bored and have nothing to do what do you do to cure your boredom? (Eg. Play pranks, annoy each other, pillow fight, etc.)

Pillow fights or pranks on the others, for sure! I especially adore ruining Mineta, as he’s a little goblin and deserves all that happens to him.

48. Would ‘Platonic Soulmates’ be an accurate description of your bond?

Ehhhh, after thinking about it…. Not really. It’s more mentor-student or parental than something dramatic like soulmates. It’s just not that deep for us, yanno?

50. What are a couple of words that sum up your friendship?

Bright, laughter, joy, free, and forever.

51. Not a question, give a random fact/headcanon about you and your f/o!

Later confirmed, he did start a movement for shipping “All Might x Mani-Neko”. Where there was nothing before, there are fans and rather silly fanfictions. A few art, too. It’s all…weirdly adorable.

The better part was overhearing Deku and Toshi talking about where to find more content and what they thought of this-and-that…. Its great, in its own way, it really is.

#hardcoresshippingmyself #Aki answers #self insert #self insert community #I WANT PEOPLE TO KNOW I STAN IZUKU DEKU MIDORIYA #HE IS MY PRECIOUS SON AND BESTEST FRIEND #I WOULD DIE FOR HIM #BUT HE WON'T LET ME #anyways this was lotsa fun!!!!#thank you for doing this!!#Deku Scrub #Watashi no Hero Academia

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darlingnisi · 7 years ago

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Celebration Day 4 : VIP Edition

Part 3 here!

FDeluxe Panel

St Paul Peterson Eric Leeds Susannah Melvoin Jellybean Johnson

This was an interesting panel. The vibe was kind of interesting? I know people are adults, lol, but kind of a good bit of cursing here...and it kind of...went to a place toward the end? But we’ll get to it :

Paul Peterson Origin Story

18 years old. Gets phone call from Bobby Z. (They’re related but not by blood through marriage)

Walked in and played once in audition. Jellybean took him under his wing

Called back the next day and Prince was there.

The Wrecka Stow joke was done on him as part of his initiation before it was in Under the Cherry Moon

Susannah Melvoin

Had known P for a while

Lived in West Hollywood with Wendy and Lisa. The doors of the house were saloon doors so nobody had any privacy.

Prince would come over and spend the night on the couch sometimes

Susannah had first singing gig with Quincy Jones. Sang with Siedah Garrett, Kevin Dorsey, and others. Her audition with Q was singing “Until You Come Back to Me” (Aretha Franklin)

Played demo for Prince. P says “Awww that was adorable”.

Asked to join The Family

She was 18 he was 25.

She says it took 2 weeks to track The Family album

Eric Leeds

P called him for a name for a song he was writing “Purple Pain? Purple Plane?” Eric, “Maybe Purple Rain?”

Brother of Alan Leeds P’s tour manager

Atlanta Bliss and Eric are from Pittsburgh. They moved to Atlanta and shared a house

Eric was considering a career change at the time after touring with high profile acts, got a call from Alan saying P needed a sax player

Eric had no interest and wasn’t into P, but needed a gig.

Had no illusions or exceptions about the experience or Prince. Got along because he came to work.

On the Making of the Family album

The Family album was made when Purple Rain was coming out

They generally worked on their parts separately. Eric didn’t even meet the rest of the band for several months after he added his parts

Peterson had to really study P’s demos. He thought it would be easy. David Z and Jellybean had to coach him a lot to get the inflections right going line by line

They had rehearsals for a year and exactly one gig.

St Paul dipped after getting a deal with A&M records...left the camp “hence P’s ‘PAUL PUNK OF THE MONTH” chants during Parade tour

Last time he saw P was during a party for LP Music in the NPG music room (LP Music is an Eric Leeds band). P gave him a big hug.

On what happened to The Family

The Family was never signed to a label. Their deal wasn’t with WB it was a production deal with Prince.

Prince was in France and wasn’t around to manage so things fell through the cracks

Not having a contract made their relationship “adversarial with P” “Prince wanted to pay as little as possible and they want as much as possible as artists”

WB didn’t know how to handle them because they were not WB artists.

Resided in no man’s land and Prince got the proceeds.

On Fdeluxe

Sheila E called to do an alumni concert at the forum it went well. After, they were invited to play a Questlove Grammy party.

Taped a Fdeluxe album in Susannah’s garage.

Annnd the panel got weird around this time...

Susannah and Eric began riffing on each other. There was cursing? Susannah said the riffing was okay because she used to date Eric? Eric made some suggestive jokes for a while? I honestly wasn’t writing any of this down because I was like...

When they came around again, Susannah mentioned she was the one who connected Clare Fischer to P as he was cool with her father.

MPLS Early Years

Gayle Chapman Dez Dickerson Dr Fink Bobby Z

Gayle Origin Story

Her friends played her P’s album thinking she’d like it

She was listening to “For You” on her own one day and she heard a voice that said “In order for Prince to tour, he’s going to need a band” it scared her as she was alone in her apartment

She called Chazz and asked if he knew Prince. He said he was his cousin and was looking for band members. Set her up with an audition.

Went to house on France ave and jammed with them

Got the call 3 months later to join

Dez Dickerson Origin Story

His little sister had For You. Was “young and arrogant” and thought he could do better.

Answered call in local paper and auditioned at Del’s Tire mart

Jammed for 15 minutes, didn’t take a solo until asked and didn’t show off, falling back into the groove. P walked him out and asked him what he noted as mature questions. (He didn’t embellish more than this, but he does have a book that details this out well if you want to check it out).

Matt Fink Origin Story

His and Bobby Z’s mom did fundraisers for Mt Sinai when they were kids

Bobby played a demo for Fink one day. Fink “who’s the band?” Bobby “it’s one guy he plays all the instruments” Fink *scooby doo sound*

He bugged Bobby for an audition and got one

On their early look

A lot of jokes, lol

“We were soul searching”

“Looked like an explosion in a soup kitchen”

“A lot of spandex and gold”

“Looked like 6 people who had never met each other”

Other stories

The Rebels was the first side project by P. If I Love You Tonight was originally recorded by Gayle. P told her to cry to get the emotion out of her while singing. The other guys also mooned her because pranksters.

Gayle got her hair “braided and beaded” before coming out to film shows in LA to promote the Prince album. The label immediately took her to get her hair done after. She got no sleep as they finished with her at 5am and she was due to the venue at 10am. “I looked like a white Donna Summer”

During the Midnight Special taping, the staff was “smashed”

For the Dick Clark show, Prince was on antihistamines and had a hard time talking after dancing and such

Told the story about Prince and Dez having an interview with Jon Bream and Bobby losing it over the lack of condiments “There’s no mayonnaise...” and it escalated including a flipped table and an almost flipped couch with Jon Bream sitting on it. P and Dez calmly continued the interview talking about serious topics with straight faces.

First time at First Avenue was to promote Dirty Mind. It was still Sams at the time. They finally connected to a local white audience with that show.

P drove a Jeep at one point

P had jokes on his answering machine that he would rotate. An example “Get off the phone you punk mother [machine beep]

Recounts wheelchair story of P being wheeled to the middle of busy foot traffic, sitting quietly, then slowly falling out of the chair. Sometimes people would help him back in the chair...he’d never say anything and play it straight.

Note : This panel was probably my favorite one. I’d heard most of the stories before, but so glad they spent time on the pre-revolution band. Just missed Andre being there...

Concert Screening Montreal 2015

Rooocked it!!!!

Setlist for the curious

F Deluxe Concert

This was very funky...but this was an odd choice to close out Celebration. Most of the crowd sat during most of this show...appreciate Susannah’s body rolls though! They were inspiring!

Set list

High Fashion Gaslight Sanctified Screams of Passion Nothing Compares 2 U “Come Go with me” lyric River Run Dry Desire Lover Drummers and Healers "Songs going down around the world” lyric Mutiny

And that was it! There was a thanks from Wally and he shouted out Purple Underground, Rodney Fitzgerald, and Michael Dean (Yay Prince Podcast) in a kind of awkward way that thanked them for the opportunity and we were on our way. (I imagine that what was kind of confusing to people who didn’t know who those people were but...)

And so concluded Celebration 2018!

#prince celebration 2018 #purple homecoming 2018

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ryqoshay · 7 years ago

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How to Handle a Nico: Reassurance

Primary Pairing: NicoMaki Secondary Pairing: NozoEli Words: ~3.7k Rating: T? Time Frame: Late in Maki’s college career and early in Nico’s idol producer career Story Arc: Stand Alone

List of all HtHaN scenes

Author’s Note: Not too long ago, a comment over on AO3 made mention of liking how I portray Nico demystifying Maki, “breaking her behavior and responses down to a science” and that got me thinking that the reverse is true as well. Maki also analyzes and learns Nico’s behavior and responses. She may be a bit slower in figuring things out, but she is just as driven in her desire to learn everything she can about Nico.

On thinking more about this topic, I realized that a lot of the scenes I have been writing as of late have been more or less using Nico as the audience surrogate. And while I think that’s fine, I would like to turn things around every so often and write a scene or two that focuses on Maki’s perspective on things.

The moment Maki entered the room, she knew something was wrong. “Nico-chan?”

“Maki-chan!?” Nico jolted before looking up at her girlfriend. “I didn’t hear you come in.” Her hand moved to do something on her laptop before she flashed a smile and her signature gesture. “How were classes?”

No. That wasn’t right. Maki pursed her lips and furrowed her eyebrows as she moved across the room.

“Maki-chan?” The raven-haired girl’s smile faltered, just a bit at the lack of response.

The redhead knelt behind her girlfriend, draped her arms over her and nuzzled her nose into her hair.

“You don’t have to lie, you know.” Maki said softly.

“Wha…?”

“That was probably fakest smile you’ve ever shown me.”

“Oh…” Nico’s shoulders slumped.

“What’s wrong?”

“Noth…” The older girl cut off as the younger girl grunted disapprovingly. After a moment, she sighed. “Sorry, Maki-chan, I… I guess I just don’t want to make you worry.”

Maki pressed herself more against her girlfriend’s back. “I’m already am worried.” She admitted, her mind running through memories of how she had watched her girlfriend ride an emotional rollercoaster for the last couple of weeks. And while she was more than happy sharing in the highs, she was feeling increasingly helpless during the lows. “Tell me, please.” She requested. “If there is anything I can do to help, anything at all, please let me know. I want to help, Nico-chan.”

“You really don't get it, do you, Maki-chan?”

What? A flash of panic skittered across Maki’s consciousness. What didn't she get? What had she missed? Did she do something wrong? Was Nico upset?

“You’re doing it right now and you don’t even realize it.”

“Huh?”

“Just keep doing what you are doing.”

“Hugging you?”

Maki could feel the other girl chuckle under her.

“Well, that too. But what I mean is… keep being you, Maki-chan. Continue to cheer me on. Stay by my side. Just… uhm, how did that song go from the Phantom again?” Nico pondered for a moment. “<Love me, that's all I ask of you.>” She couldn't help singing the lyric in English.

“I do love you, Nico-chan.”

“I know. And I don’t think I could ever tell you properly how happy that makes me. So, like I said, just keep doing what you’re doing, because I love it.” Nico leaned back against her girlfriend. “I love you, Maki-chan.”

A warm feeling spread through Maki. No matter how many times she heard Nico say it, she doubted she would ever tire of it. Still…

“I just…” Maki struggled for a moment to find the best words to express her concerns. “I wish I could do more. You…” She was about to list off all the things Nico did for her when she was interrupted.

“Maki-chan.” Nico said firmly. “Not once have I ever thought that you don’t do enough for me. Not once have I thought, ‘Gee, I wish Maki-chan would do more in our relationship.’” She took her girlfriend’s hand, raised it to her lips and placed a gentle kiss on the back of it. “I love you, Maki-chan and I love all that you do for me.”

“… Sorry…” Maki heard herself say before she thought better of it.

Nico chuckled again. “What are you apologizing for now?”

“I wanted to reassure you because you looked upset when I came in, but you ended up reassuring me instead.”

“But you did reassure me. Weren’t you paying attention?”

“Wha…?”

“You saw that I was upset, didn’t buy my attempt to hide it and came over to comfort me. You reassured me and didn’t even realize it. Geez, you’re dense sometimes.”

“Mmmph…” Maki felt a pout come to her lips.

“You reminded me that no matter what, I have your support. And the support of many others.” Nico explained. “I’d forgotten that for a moment.”

“What the heck?”

Nico sighed. “Because I stupidly started reading some forum threads.” She motioned to the laptop in front of her.

“I don’t get it.”

“Remember that deal I was trying to set up with that other small production company?”

“The one that fell through?”

“Yeah. Anyway, it seems Etsuko somehow found out about it and has spent the day stirring up the embers of anger with my old fans who still feel betrayed. There’s a full-fledged flamewar spreading across several idol sites.”

“Hasn’t Etsuko done enough to you already?” Maki wrinkled her nose while saying her name.

“Apparently not.” Nico shrugged. “But it’s alright. You can’t have a fight on a forum without two sides and that other side is made up of those who still support me. I really am blessed to have such loyal fans.”

“Yeah, you do have some great fans.” Maki agreed.

“And that thing falling through isn’t even that big of a deal.” Nico continued. “Sure, it would have been nice, I mean connections are connections and alliances are alliances, but it’s not going to break us. Egao Jōshō will still become the No. 1 Idol Production Company in the Universe.”

“You mean it isn’t already?” Maki couldn’t help asking, allowing a hint of teasing into her tone.

“Nope.” Nico responded with a surprising amount of sincerity, enough that it made Maki second guess her teasing for a moment. “But so long as amazing people like Hanayo, Tsubasa,” she hugged Maki’s arms “and you are around, we’ll get there. I know we will.”

“Mmm…” Maki tilted her head down to plant a kiss on top of the other girl’s head.

Nico began to twist around and push herself towards her girlfriend. Maki sat back and allowed the other girl to slide onto her lap. From her new position, Nico wrapped her arms around Maki’s neck so she could pull closer. Maki responded by turning her head to meet the incoming kiss.

“We’re home!” A voice announced from the entry.

And just like that, the spell was broken. Maki pulled away, immediately lamenting the sigh Nico released before rolling her eyes.

“Welcome back!” Nico called, getting to her feet. She turned to her girlfriend and offered a hand. “Let’s go greet them, shall we?”

Maki nodded quietly, accepted the help up and allowed herself to be lead toward the door.

“Hey, you two!” Eli greeted with a smile as the couple came around the corner. “We have a surprise for you!” She indicated a long and slim, but sizable box leaning against the wall.

“Elicchi noticed this while we were out shopping today.” Nozomi explained, already moving to open the box. “I consulted the cards and they said it would prove useful.” She slid the item out of the box before turning to reveal it.

“A keyboard?” Maki stepped forward to get a better view.

“It’s a little beat up because it was used, but I tried it before they reboxed it and I think it sounds alright.” Eli turned her attention to the redhead approaching. “Still, we should probably let you, our resident pianist, make the final decision on whether we keep or ret…” She cut off as she suddenly found herself in an unexpected embrace. “Xорошо?” She uttered in confusion.

“Thank you.” Maki murmured before letting go. She turned to find Nozomi already grinning and holding her arms wide. Suddenly aware of her emotionally charged behavior, she blushed.

“You’re welcome, Maki-chan.” Nozomi said, as the younger girl sheepishly moved over to hug her as well. “So, do you want some help setting it up?”

“Yes, please.”

With all four girls working together, it took less than five minutes to get the device up and running. Immediately on powering up the keyboard, Maki began pressing keys to listen to the sounds they made. Eli had been right, despite the external casing being a bit banged up, the sound quality was surprisingly good so the internal components were fine.

“Are you going to play something, Maki-chan?” Nico asked, obvious anticipation seeping into her voice.

Maki looked up to find an expression of excited expectation on her girlfriend’s face and she couldn’t help meeting the smile with one of her own. The older girl knew how to cook, willingly did house cleaning duties, took care of her when she was sick and overall did many things to look out for Maki’s wellbeing. And while Maki’s abilities to reciprocate in those departments was lacking, there was one thing she knew, for certain, she could do that never failed to make Nico happy; play the piano and sing. Or maybe that was two things, but whatever.

“Definitely.” Maki agreed as her mind began shuffling through what she knew she could play from memory.

One song, in particular, repeated itself in the cycle; the one Nico had brought up earlier. She did a quick mental check to ensure she remembered all the lyrics and chords. But, it was a duet, in English… Would Nico pick up on that? Did she know the words to her part? Wait… in the play, the song ended with the two characters kissing! Eli and Nozomi were here! Would Nico still want to… yes, of course she would want to; Nico loved public displays of affection. And Nozomi would definitely tease them about it because that’s just what Nozomi did. Still… it did seem to be a fitting song for the situation… and she hadn’t sung a duet with Nico in far too long… and it would definitely make Nico happy…

Swallowing her embarrassment, Maki began to play. “<No more talk of darkness. Forget these wide-eyed fears.>”

Nico’s eyes widened with recognition. Maki could tell by her expressions that the older girl was quickly reviewing Christine’s part in her own mind to prepare. She fidgeted with her phone, likely considering looking up the lyrics. However, when she smiled, Maki knew she was ready.

“<Say you’ll love me every waking moment.>” Nico sang, moving to a position opposite the keyboard from her girlfriend, maintaining steady eye contact the entire time. “<Turn my head with talk of summertime.>”

For someone who had likely only heard the song less than a dozen times, Maki had to admit she was impressed with how well Nico performed the part of Christine. Though she didn’t play an instrument, nor did she write songs, there was no question that Nico’s musical knowledge and prowess easily rivaled that of Maki’s. Well, actually, there were a few songs that Nico had written mostly on her own, and she definitely had helped refine many of the songs Maki and Umi had written back in high school. And, if she put her mind to it, Nico probably could play an instrument if she wanted.

Nico giggled a bit when Maki substituted her name for Christine’s and it was enough to bring Maki’s focus back on the duet they were sharing. By the gods, she loved that smile. Nico’s smile was undeniably genuine now, not fake like she had tried to show earlier. This was the smile that had worked its way deep into her heart years ago. Seeing that, Maki was certain she had made the right choice in songs.

“<Anywhere you go, let me go too.>” The couple sang in unison as the song approached its conclusion. “<Love me, that’s all I ask of you.>”

As they held the note for the required number of beats, Nico reached up to Maki’s cheek. The redhead responded by leaning forward, across the keyboard. Finally, they ended the song and their lips met.

“<Bravi! Bravi! Bravissimi!>” Nozomi intoned in Italian.

Maki tore away from her girlfriend, almost throwing herself off balance with how quickly she stood up. Silently, she cursed the blush she knew was already flaring across her cheeks. Gods, she hated this part of herself. Nico’s lips turned down into a frown. No. That wasn’t what she wanted. She wanted to see Nico smile again. But what could she… well, the kiss had ended prematurely… again… and she did like, no, she loved kissing Nico… but Eli and Nozomi were watching…

“Geez, thanks Nozo…” Nico began to grumble.

Oh, what the heck. Maki crushed down her embarrassment once again and reached forward to place her hand on her girlfriend’s cheek. The raven-haired girl’s eyes widened again, this time in surprise as she cut off what she was saying. Before she could decide against it, Maki leaned forward and pressed their lips together. She felt Nico stiffen for the briefest of instances, but then she relaxed and wrapped her arms around the taller girl’s neck to pull her deeper into the kiss.

Closer. More. Nico.

Maki shoved all thoughts of the audience aside and let herself get lost in the moment, almost tipping over the keyboard as she tried to get even closer to the girl she loved.

After a little while, it was Nico who began to break away, and with no shortage of reluctance, Maki allowed her. Ah, that was more like what she wanted to see. Nico’s eyes were unfocused, her breathing was heavier than normal and she even swayed a little unsteadily, all proving how deep she had dived into the moment with her.

Maki couldn’t help glancing over at Nozomi, who thankfully remained quite this time, though Maki decided she could do without that overly-satisfied smile. Eli looked like she wanted to say something but was unwilling to be the one to break the silence.

“Mmm…” Nico hummed contently as she came back to reality. She smiled as her gaze met Maki’s before murmuring. “That was lovely.”

“Quite lovely indeed.” Nozomi agreed.

“Uhm, yes.” Eli spoke up. “That was a lovely song, though I cannot place where I might have heard it before.”

“Oh, it’s from Phantom of the Opera.” Nozomi explained.

“Ah, that’s why.” The blonde nodded. “I’ve never seen the show, just heard some of its music here and there.”

“Well, perhaps that’s what we should watch tonight.”

Maki couldn’t help wincing a bit and quickly tried to hide it.

“You object, Maki-chan?” Of course, the ever-attentive spiritual girl would notice.

“No, I just, uhm…” Maki fumbled for an explanation. “It’s not that the movie is horrible, just that… well, I grew up with the Broadway production…”

“Grew up with Broadway?” A quirky expression crossed Nico’s face. “Maki-chan, the movie came out when you were only, like what, five…”

“Eight.” The redhead corrected.

“Whatever.” The raven-haired girl dismissed. “Anyway, you would have grown up with that as well.”

“Not really.” Maki shook her head. “My parents love the theater and took me to see shows on Broadway when they traveled to New York on business. They wanted me to appreciate the theater and the arts as much as they do. And the movie is just… I dunno… Butler’s voice is too…” what had that one reviewer called it? “rock ‘n’ roll? I mean I know The Lord Lloyd Webber…”

“The Lord Lloyd Webber?” Nico raised an eyebrow.

“Technically, the Right Honorable The Lord Lloyd-Webber, but…”

“Huh… royalty…” Nico shook her head.

“Nobility.” Maki corrected. “And he’s a life Peer, not a hereditary Peer.”

“Whatever.”

“Anyway, I know he liked Butler, but it’s just not what I’m used to. The Phantom is supposed to have a smooth, powerful and seductive voice. And…”

“Yeah, well not all of us can just go see Broadway plays whenever, Maki-chan.” Nico pointed out. “So, the more widely available Hollywood production is good enough.”

Nozomi giggled. “Nicocchi, have you forgotten you’re dating someone who can take you to Broadway whenever?”

“I… no!” Nico protested. “I’m sorry, Maki-chan.” She glanced apologetically at her girlfriend. “I didn’t mean that like it probably sounded. And I wouldn’t want to take advantage…”

“I want to go.” Maki interrupted. “I love Broadway. And I would love to go with you sometime, Nico-chan. We could see any show you want, even if I’ve already seen it; especially if it’s Phantom.”

“Really?” Ruby eyes sparkled.

“Honestly, when we all went to New York as µ’s, it felt strange not to see a show.” Maki remembered the trip they had all taken a few years back. “But I didn’t know if anyone else would want to go, so I didn’t bring it up.”

“Sorry, Maki-chan,” Nozomi spoke up “I didn’t realize you felt that way. I would have gone with you.”

“Same here.” Nico added.

“I would have gone as well.” Eli chimed in. “I’ve seen some of the dance numbers in online videos, but seeing them in person is an entirely different experience.”

“Maybe…” Maki’s mind raced with ideas. “Maybe we could all go sometime?”

“All four of us?” Nozomi inquired.

Maki nodded. “We could join Papa and Mama the next time they go for business. There’s plenty of room on the plane. We could get a box to ourselves.” Amethyst eyes lit up. “Maybe we could even get Box 5!”

“We wouldn’t want to impose.” Eli said.

“You wouldn’t be.” Maki shook her head. “As I said, my parents love the theater. But they really love sharing that experience with others who might be interested. They bring friends and business partners and such all the time. And they’ve told me before that I could bring friends if I wanted. I guess I just haven’t had friends who were interested in theater before.”

“Maki-chan.” Nico’s shoulders slumped in an exaggerated display of exasperation. “How many musicals have we watched together?”

“I, uhm… a lot?”

“And you didn’t know I liked musicals?”

“Well, yeah, but the stage is different from the screen…”

“Yeah, it’s live.” Nico grinned. “And what have I said about listening to recordings of my idol music versus seeing a concert live?”

“Live is better?”

“Exactly. And Eli is a former ballet dancer, so we know why she is interested.” Nico motioned to the blonde who nodded affirmation. “And Nozomi… probably just wants to check out the chorus girls…”

The purple-haired girl giggled.

“So, you guys want to go?” Maki asked tentatively, despite pretty much knowing the answer. When the expected three confirmations were given, she smiled and continued. “I’ll ask my parents when they’re heading over next.”

Nico practically skipped around the keyboard. Once on the other side, she threw herself at her girlfriend in an excited tackle hug. “This is going to be awesome!” She bounced up and down happily, pulling Maki along with her movements. “I’m going to have to check online to see what shows are running.”

Maki couldn’t help but laugh at her girlfriend’s exuberance. And knowing that she was responsible for Nico’s excitement made her all that much happier.

“We’ll leave the planning up to you then, Maki.” Eli glanced at her girlfriend, who nodded. “We’ll see whatever show, or shows, you two want.”

“In the meantime, are you really that opposed to watching Hollywood’s version, Maki-chan?” Nozomi asked.

“Not really, I guess.” Maki twirled a strand of her hair around her finger. “If Eli hasn’t seen either the movie or stage version, seeing the movie first might be the better order to do things.”

“Alright then, I’ll see if I can find it one of the services.”

“I’ll go make dinner.” Nico said, turning toward the kitchen. “Would you be so kind as to provide some accompanying music, Maki-chan?” she asked over her shoulder.

A smile pulled at Maki’s lips. “Of course.”

“I’ll…” Eli started.

“Elicchi.” Nozomi interrupted. “Please take your usual spot, relax and be your adorable self.” She smirked as her girlfriend’s blush. “I’ll join you in a moment so we can enjoy Maki-chan’s concert together.” She then began to fuss with the remote in order to find the movie.

Once her audience was ready, Maki began to play.

“So… Maki-chan as Raoul, huh?” Nico mused as she crawled under the covers to join her girlfriend. “Would owning a hospital today be a kind of modern equivalent of a viscount?”

“Maybe.” Maki replied. “I’m not sure, really.”

“But Nico thought Maki-chan knew all about royalty and stuff.”

“Nobility.” The younger girl corrected again. “And I don’t know everything. Though I think I remember Mama or Papa telling me that members of Nishikino lineage were included within the Kazoku.”

“So, I’m dating someone of royal blood?” The older girl suddenly sounded excited.

“Noble. And maybe?” Maki conceded. “But I’m not entirely sure. I’d have to ask them again to remember what rank we may have held.”

“So, Nico really does make a good Christine.” Even in the dimly lit room, Nico’s smile shone splendidly. “Not only are we both amazing singers, but we are both dating royalty.”

“Nobility.” At this point, Maki figured the other girl was doing it on purpose to annoy her.

“Though given the choice between Raoul and the Phantom…” Nico continued, apparently ignoring the correction. “I don’t think I’d take either.”

“Oh?”

“Yup. Nico is quite happy with her choice.” That said, Nico pulled herself closer to her girlfriend and snuggled into her. “Nico-nii’s Maki-chan really is the best choice.”

Maki’s heart skipped a beat and warmth gathered in her cheeks. Strange. Even though they had been dating for a few years now, Nico still managed to have that same old effect on her.

“Hee… is Maki-chan blushing?” Nico propped herself up on her elbow so she could lean over the other girl.

“I… hey…” Maki turned her head. “D-don’t look at me…”

Nico laughed.

“Mohhh…”

“Anyway,” Nico settled back down beside her girlfriend “thank you, Maki-chan, for a wonderful evening.”

“Mmmm…”

“Today was kind of rough and that whole flamewar forum thing didn’t help.” Nico continued. “But then you came home and reassured me that, all things considered, I’m doing pretty good.” She smiled. “Really good, actually. Really, really good.”

“I’m… glad I was able to help.”

“You did.” Nico confirmed. “More than I think you realize.”

“Hmmm…” Somewhere in the back of Maki’s mind, she felt like had considered something like this before; if just loving Nico was enough. After a few moments, she realized she wasn’t going to remember and decided to just be happy that Nico thought it was enough, even if Maki still wanted to do more.

More…

Well… there was one other thing she knew she could do that made Nico happy… though, maybe happy was the wrong word, but…

“Maki-chan?” Nico asked as the other girl turned toward her.

“Nico-chan…” Maki let her desires color her tone as she pushed herself up to a position over the other girl.

Nico reached up to pull Maki down into a kiss. As their lips met, the pleased sound Nico made let Maki know her actions were appreciated.

Author’s Note Continued: I swear this scene was not originally intended to turn into a discussion about the Phantom of the Opera. I had Nico say sing that one line initially just as a reference to the fact that the couple often watch musicals together. Then my µ’s muse started working a bit of overtime and the scene almost quadrupled in length. Not complaining, mind.

And I guess there is now a keyboard in Nico and Nozomi’s apartment. I have little doubt it will come into play - pun intended - in a future scene or two.

And there is a New York trip being planned. That has also been added to the notes for a possible future scene or two.

And now I need to double check to see if the Original Broadway version of Phantom is still on my iPod so I can listen to it the next time I drive up to the cities.

#NicoMaki #Nishikino Maki #Yazawa Nico #How to Handle a Nico #Love Live #fanfic

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trashartandmovies · 4 years ago

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Berlinale Film Festival 2021, Industry Event, Day 1

We all knew the 71st Berlinale would be different, but who’d have guessed we’d be given a twofer? At this point, the juries for the Competition, Encounters, Shorts, and Generations sections have all handed out their awards. These juries got to watch the films in their respective categories on the big screen. Meanwhile, the press were given the opportunity to screen these movies at home, as well as the films in the Berlinale Special, Panorama, Forum and Forum Expanded sections, as well as the six films making up the Perspektive Deutsches Kino category and episodes from the six television shows included in Berlinale Series. (The always excellent Retrospective section is only screening during the summer.) Altogether, around 150 at-home screenings were made available to the press. We had five days to watch them. I was able to watch 22 of them. This is Part One.

———

I’m sure everyone covering the festival is hoping that the Summer Special, in mid-June, will go smoothly and we’ll be able to catch at least a fraction of the movies we weren’t able to see. (For geo-blocking streaming reasons, a few films in the lineup weren’t available at all in my geo-region. Including two in the Competition: the FABIAN adaptation and Daniel Daniel Brühl’s directorial debut NEXT DOOR.) Usually, the press is given a week ahead of the festival to check out the Panorama, Forum and Generations titles. One assumes it’s so that audiences may get some recommendations on these lower-profile movies in the inevitable situation when all the high-profile films are sold out. Will this happen in the summer? Unless I missed a press release, the details around the Summer Special are still a bit vague. Rightfully so, since we’re still living in week-by-week uncertainty as far as lockdown measures go.

All we can do now is cross our fingers and hope for a chance to get a look at some of the these titles, because when presented with the challenge of covering a 150-movie lineup over just five days, you have to make some obvious decisions. I suspect many people did what I did — try to watch all the Competition titles and get in a few Encounters, Specials, some shorts and hold out hope for one or two stray Panoramas or Forums. To make matters more heartbreaking, the press screenings went like this: every morning at 7:00 AM, you’d get an impossibly long list of films to watch until 7:00 AM next morning. You’d get a few Competition titles, a few Encounters and Specials, and a deluge of films from the other categories. For many films, all you could do is look at the title, nod, and say to yourself, hopefully we’ll meet again soon, because there’s no way I can fit a sixth movie in today without losing my mind.

(Now there was a wrinkle added to this plan. Over the weekend of March 6 - 7, the press could screen the award winners that got announced on Friday. But it was difficult to try and take this into consideration in any strategic way.)

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Like most film festivals, Berlinale usually kicks things off with a star-studded opening night movie that’s usually too mainstream for the critics. With no red carpet to be concerned with this year, that wasn’t the case. Instead, on Day One, the closest to a big movie star name was Iain Glen (Game of Thrones). Glen isn’t the lead in Tim Fehlbaum’s TIDES, shown in the Berlinale Special program, but he does play a key role as an astronaut who’s landed back on Earth, generations after human had mostly left the increasingly inhabitable planet. Humans have been living in a space colony called Kepler, but everyone ended up sterile, so missions are being sent back to Earth in the hopes that they can once again live there and get their reproductive groove back.

That’s the underlying story of TIDES, and it’s just one element that will likely feel very familiar to anyone who’s well-versed in post-apocalyptic cinema. The color palette is stark, with muted colors. The landscape is barren, this one with lots of water, rather than the desert locales of Mad Max. In fact, the notorious WATERWORLD came to mind more than once while watching TIDES. There’s even a doll in the film that looks just like Dennis Hopper’s character in that film, eye patch and everything. That little detail may be one of the most interesting things about the film.

The main character of TIDES is another astronaut, played with a committed intensity by Nora Arnezeder. She crash lands on Earth, is held captive by central casting post-apocalyptic scavengers, and eventually tries to track down a McGuffin that will let her contact Kepler and report back that there are people reproducing on Earth. Meanwhile, she also suspects that something might remain of the previous mission that was comprised of her father and Iain Glen.

The main attraction here is Fehlbaum’s use of stunning landscapes and practical locations, like a beached industrial ocean liner that serves as inspiration for one of the primary sets. The art design and costumes are all exceptional, while the acting and photography are all decent enough. But it never does much with the conspiracy it tries to entertain us with. Its attempts at being thrilling look good, but can’t help but feel like pretty standard stuff at this point. It’s worth noting that one of the film’s producers is Roland Emmerich, a man who knows a thing or two about making generic high concept action pictures. Some things, like the art design and the pleasingly diverse and international cast, set TIDES apart. But the story is far less inspired.

Faring better were the Day One Competition titles. I started with MEMORY BOX, a lively picture wherein a daughter gets to better understand her mother when a box of the mom’s old teenage diaries and correspondence ends up on their doorstep. (This mother-daughter connection is essentially the same theme that Céline Sciamma’s PETITE MAMAN covers in a different, more sci-fi, fashion.) As the daughter, living in a nice house in Montreal, digs into her mother’s old journals, scrapbooks and tape recordings, the film travels back to 1980s Beirut through the eyes of her teenage mom. It makes these trips back in time through some pretty cool moments of collage-like animation — putting scrapbook pages into motion and diving into photographs and contact sheets that come alive. Plus, the soundtrack is killer, full of lively 80s post punk like Killing Joke, The Stranglers and Blondie.

There’s romance, the trauma of war, a strong refugee story, and a poignant tale of cross-generational understanding. The kicker is that it’s very autobiographical, with the film mirroring co-director Joana Hadjithomas’s own story of corresponding with her friend in Paris while Beirut was falling down around her. These journals are backed up by old photographs taken in Beirut from the other co-director, Kahil Joreige. Like last year’s fascinating BLOODY NOSE, EMPTY POCKETS, and this year’s A COP MOVIE, Berlinale movies are continuing to find success in blurring the line between documentary and narrative fiction. The movie has a little trouble maintaining momentum all the way through, but I loved the experimentation on display here, and the unique ways it tells its story. It helps that MEMORY BOX really sticks the landing at the end.

Next up was ICH BIN DEIN MENSCH, or I’M YOUR MAN — another film, like many in recent years, interested in the ethics behind artificial intelligence and robots with emotions. Think of it as a romantic comedy version of BLADE RUNNER, or an updated version of the forgotten-by-time Ann Magnuson and John Malkovich vehicle MAKING MR. RIGHT. This one, based on a recent short story by Emma Braslavsky, is directed by Maria Schrader, who recently helmed the popular Netflix series Unorthodox (she’s also a veteran film and TV actress, from Tatort and Deutschland 86 to AIMEE & JAGUAR). Schrader continues to prove that she has a good eye for framing and storytelling. The movie doesn’t always escape the problem that many German movies continue to struggle with, which is that they often feel like a good TV movie rather than a work of cinema, but it manages better than most.

The general idea is that Maren Eggert plays Alma, a researcher who is assigned the task of spending a couple weeks with a new personal companion robot named Tom, played by the dreamy-eyed Dan Stevens. Alma is, of course, a completely rational-minded person who is happy to just get through the two weeks with as little interaction with Tom as possible. In her mind, it’s an impossibility that a piece of technology could fulfill a human being’s needs. Of course, as each day goes by, Tom continues to surprise her and wear down her defenses.

It’s a pretty well-worn story by now. The issues that get raised over the course of the movie are some that Star Trek: The Next Generation was dealing with on a regular basis (Tom is similar to Data, though Stevens doesn’t need any special contact lenses), but there are some interesting wrinkles here. Few movies have looked at this subject from the female perspective. And if there’s one that that this year’s Berlinale truly excelled at, it’s offering a wide variety of movies by female directors and/or with female leads. We’ve covered three movies that fit that criteria already, and many more will come. What’s more, Maren Eggert gives us a character who’s at an age where she’s wrestling with the question of whether or not her child-bearing days are behind her. When’s the last time Hollywood dealt with that subject? So, while Alma starts off as a very emotionally distant, academic type, and the best thing about the movie is uncovering her past and getting to understand why she has put up so many walls. I’m not sure it does much with the subject of AI or robot companions, but it does provide a charming odd-couple story and I don’t have any complaints with Eggert winning the festival’s best actress award.

The nightcap on Day One was INTEURODEOKSYEON, or INTRODUCTION, the newest film by the prolific Korean auteur Hong Sangsoo. At last year’s Berlinale, Sangsoo was also in the Competition with the excellent THE GIRL WHO RAN, and he doesn’t disappoint with INTRODUCTION. Ironically enough, if you’re unfamiliar with Hong Sangsoo and don’t know where to start — understandable given the nearly 30 films he’s directed in the past 25 years — INTRODUCTION ain’t a bad way to start. It’s not his best work, but it’s pretty damn good, and a very accessible entry-point into the man’s style and thematic interests. And it barely cracks the 60-minute mark, so you’re not committing to much.

This one ping-pongs between a young man, Youngho, and a young woman, Juwan, both trying to figure out what to do with their lives. Juwan wants to study fashion in Berlin, Youngho wants to become an actor. Both run into problems with these pursuits — some of which are out of their control. In Youngho’s case, it leads to a hilariously drunken dinner confrontation with Ki Joo-bong, who may or may not be playing a version of himself, since he’s only credited as “Old Actor.” The esteemed Korean actor Joo-bong has appeared in Park Chan-wook films, SAVE THE GREEN PLANET, as well as few of Sangsoo’s other films and some 70 other movies. In INTRODUCTION, his character is revered by every other person he meets. And his advice to Youngho is an eruptive highlight in a movie that’s otherwise pretty subtle.

Subtlety is often Sangsoo’s thing, but the emotions he leaves you with tend to be pretty strong. This is his magic. He writes very realistic, dialog-driven scenes that, on their own, are nuanced and deceptively simple. But these quiet scenes build up to an ending that makes everything come together in a profound way. Even if you’re familiar with Sangsoo’s work, INTRODUCTION may come across as slight, or a minor work in the maestro’s deep catalog, but I found it’s pleasures to be more immediate than usual. To my knowledge, no one is writing screenplays like this. The way he reveals characters, develops them, and draws connections through casual lines of dialog, sometimes nested deep within a conversation, is practically his trademark move, and it’s never not remarkable. It demands your attention and then rewards it at the end. His technique is patient, confident and hugely sophisticated. The only problem I see is that, given his track record of releasing one or two movies a year, his talent is in danger of being taken. Don’t be one of those people.

#Berlinale 2021 #Hong Sangsoo #Introduction #I'm Your Man #Tides #Memory Box

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arplis · 4 years ago

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Arplis - News: Two years ago, but it seems closer to ten, a nice deputy editor for a new publication approached me to write a piece

He had been reading me forever and was working for this company with a bunch of money invested in it, could pay pretty well and expose me to some new readers not only on the web but a print magazine he compared to Rolling Stone. I said yes and we were going back and forth about what my first piece should be, and then my mom died. Freelance gigs are usually a little stressful and all-consuming for me, but for some reason I still wanted to do it. Looking back at my emails, I was literally trying to schedule around the days off I had other than the one for the funeral. I agreed to write about the Halloween series, in conjunction with the upcoming David Gordon Green sequel. I watched all ten existing movies (including remakes) and came up with this piece that ties them all together thematically, at times addressing the grief and fears I was dealing with at the time. I took longer than I was supposed to and ended up with twice the agreed upon word count and I was so unsure anybody else would be interested that in my email I said, “If you don’t want it I understand, just let me know and I’ll use it on outlawvern.com and we’ll come up with something else for me to work on for you.” Then the magazine (you will never see this coming) ran out of money, all the editors resigned, I don’t believe I ever got paid and the article could only be seen on the Wayback Machine. But I got no regrets because working on this helped me in a tough period of my life and gave me a better understanding of my relationship with the genre. So I’m proud to repost it here. (I’ve kept their edits, so you’ll notice some British spellings in here.) THE SHAPE OF EVIL: Confronting darkness through the ‘Halloween’ series 26 October 2018 08:59 John Carpenter’s Halloween (1978) was, in its time, the most successful independent movie ever made, and its influence still echoes through cinema four decades later. It cemented many of the hallmarks of the slasher subgenre: unstoppable masked killers, murder sprees tied to holidays, a troubling connection between sexual activity and death. And it became one of the most enduring brands in horror history, spawning a series of eight sequels so far (including a new one this month), undeterred even by a 2007 remake that had its own sequel. Some may wonder why, in these dark times of mass shootings, human rights abuses, corrupt regimes, collapsing institutions and impending environmental catastrophe, anyone would want to watch ten movies about an escaped mental patient stabbing people to death. Personally, I found catharsis in revisiting them all this month while grieving over the loss of my parents to long, cruel illnesses. If you look at the series as a mass-market treatise on humankind’s struggles against death and evil you can focus less on the horror of being stabbed and more on the possibility of getting away. In the opening scene of Halloween, as well as the closing of part four and other moments throughout the series, our viewpoint is from behind the mask of the killer. Lesser Halloween sequels, particularly the sixth and eighth entries, try to further implicate us in the evil by creating victims who ‘deserve it’ in cinematic terms – an abusive husband, an obnoxious shock jock. But, for the majority of the series, we identify with Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) and the other protagonists who follow her, rooting for them so we can survive by proxy. We watch the masked killer Michael Myers in movies to face our worst fears in a forum where they can never get us, can never truly win. Being a fan of more than one Halloween movie is more complicated than it may sound. It requires canonical decisions, like some Video Age equivalent of ancient scriptures. It would be easy to recognise only the original Carpenter productions, Halloween and Halloween II (1981), with or without the narratively unrelated Halloween III: Season of the Witch (Tommy Lee Wallace, 1982). Some fans who came up in the Eighties may also acknowledge Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (Dwight H. Little, 1988) and Halloween 5: the Revenge of Michael Myers (Dominique Othenin-Girard, 1989), but the cliffhanger of 5 demands the resolution of Halloween: The Curse of Michael Myers (Joe Chappelle, 1995), which many reject due to its out-of-left-field retconning in of a cult that has been controlling Michael since the beginning. Even those who accept that twist have to decide between the theatrical version and the drastically different ‘Producer’s Cut’, once a semi-legendary bootleg, now an official release. ‘Halloween’ (John Carpenter, 1978) To enjoy them all you have to accept multiple realities, because the timeline expands and contracts like an accordion. Halloween H20: 20 Years Later (Steve Miner, 1998) erases everything after II. Laurie faked her death and went into hiding, which could explain her absence in 4-6, except that now she doesn’t have a daughter named Jamie (Danielle Harris). Personally, I like the H20 continuity as long as I can disavow Halloween Resurrection (Rick Rosenthal, 2002), which turns the ending of H20 on its head so that Michael survives and Laurie doesn’t, like some shocking cinematic Supreme Court ruling. And now David Gordon Green’s Halloween (2018), a sequel, not remake, of John Carpenter’s movie of the same title, will tell us that there is only John Carpenter’s Halloween. It even erases II – which continued on the same night and was written, scored and reshot by Carpenter – so Laurie and Michael are no longer siblings. (Which means the TV version of the first film is also out.) Like Michael’s body at the end of the first film, all those sequels were there just a second ago, and now they’re gone. They could be anywhere, or everywhere. But through all its repetitions and resets, the series keeps performing the same ritual: hiding a pure, unknowable malevolence behind a rubber human face and sending it into our civilisation to see if we can survive its wrath. In all but one of these films, that force of evil is Michael Myers, who at the age of six put on a clown mask, stabbed his sister Judith just moments before their parents got home, and never spoke again. Since Michael saw Judith fooling around with her boyfriend before the murder, people often interpret some sort of prudish anti-sex judgment behind his actions, something that became a cliché in the wave of slasher movies that followed in Halloween’s wake. But I think we only assign an explanation like that to protect ourselves from our fear of the inexplicable. There is no cause or motive. Even by the eighth film, so little is known about Michael that the producers of a live webcast from his house have to plant fake props to imply ‘something that might explain why Michael Myers went bad’. After his first murder, the kid and his parents look equally dumbfounded. They have no idea why it happened. So grown up Michael Myers and his mask represent the unknowable and the incomprehensible. To keep him extra-mysterious, his head stays out of frame while he stalks the neighbourhood during the day; even though, with close examination, you can see enough to tell that he’s wearing the mask. It’s worth noting that we actually can glimpse his face when he’s stealing the car at the beginning of the first film and can see it clearly when Laurie pulls off his mask at the end. His expressions reveal so little emotion or intelligence that it’s easy to forget those shots and think of the mask as his true face. He’s as much an automaton as the zombie-like gangsters in Carpenter’s earlier Assault on Precinct 13 (1976). His psychiatrist of 15 years, Dr. Samuel Loomis (Donald Pleasence), gave up on Michael’s humanity in 1972 and considers him a personification of evil, as in, ‘He’s gone, he’s gone from here. The evil is gone!’ He says that ‘what was living behind that boy’s eyes was purely and simply evil.’ He refers to him as ‘it’, instead of him. He tells the sheriff that ‘Death has come to your little town.’ None of this seems like an appropriate way for a doctor to talk about a patient, but it belies Loomis’s diagnosis that this man in the mask is no longer whoever (or whatever) Michael Myers was before he snapped and killed his sister. Tommy Doyle, the kid whom Laurie is babysitting, calls Michael ‘the boogeyman’, a description that Laurie eventually adopts. Not even the end credits consider him to be a person anymore – they call him ‘The Shape’ (a tradition repeated in 2, 6, H20 and the 2018 sequel). And though 4 and 5 are chapters that credit him with his human name, 4 has a preacher who tells us that ‘Apocalypse, end of the world, Armageddon – it’s always got a face and a name… you can’t kill damnation, mister. It don’t die like a man dies.’ And 5 emphasises Michael’s Death status by having him wield a scythe like the grim reaper. He finds it in a barn, and uses it to kill a more watered-down personification of evil: a partygoer in a sexy devil costume, armed with a legitimate farmer’s pitchfork. There’s a popular notion – fuelled by the theories of Randy in Scream (Wes Craven, 1996), themselves inspired by the ‘Final Girl’ concept in Carol J. Clover’s book Men, Women and Chainsaws: Gender in the Modern Horror Film – that Laurie survives because she’s a virgin or a goody two-shoes. The latter is disprovable: Laurie shares two joints with Annie in the car. But I don’t see it as Laurie being rewarded for her good qualities. I see it as her having to go through all this because she’s the one that always has to deal with this shit while other people are out screwing around. That’s her personality and her lot in life. She runs errands for her dad’s real estate business, babysits to save up money, and takes care of Lindsey so that Annie can have fun with her boyfriend. Twenty years later, she’s the headmaster taking care of the rich people’s kids, and even then she stays behind and gets attacked by The Shape while most of the school has fun on a field trip. ‘Halloween II’ (Rick Rosenthal, 1981) A working title for Halloween was The Babysitter Murders, and though shifting the emphasis to the holiday setting was an ingenious hook, giving the heroine this societal role was also crucial. It’s this strange stage of growing-up where she’s not treated as an adult, yet trusted with the sacred task of protecting someone else’s children. Dr. Loomis held a related role – to understand young Michael and help him heal – but he has long since failed. Now his mission is just to tell everybody: Hey, this guy is evil, there was nothing I could do, now it’s your fault for not listening. His superiors pass the buck as well, declaring ‘I’m not responsible, Sam!’ Loomis wears a trench coat and carries a pistol, a self-styled warrior, a ‘good guy with a gun,’ our society’s prescription for murderers, terrorists, and other evils we don’t know how to understand. Not until part five, when he spends time with Jamie in a hospital, does he act like a child psychiatrist again. And he ends up yelling at her and being rightfully reprimanded by a nurse. In her status as a deputised adult, Laurie tries to console Tommy by telling him that there’s no such thing as a boogeyman. But after having been attacked, having shepherded the children to safety, and been rescued by Loomis, she breaks down and she and the doctor agree that that was the boogeyman that just came after her. The Shape has destroyed the comfort of her worldview. It is an evil that undermines belief in objective truth. When Halloween’s story continues in II, Laurie’s lacerations seem superficial, but she’s in such shock that they have to carry her out of the house on a stretcher, and she finds herself bed-ridden at Haddonfield Memorial. She has lost all agency, unable to even stop them from giving her a shot. The babysitter, having fulfilled her duty and returned her charges safely to their rightful guardians, now has no choice but to hand herself over to society’s official healers and protectors. But they are fallible. Sherriff Brackett (Charles Cyphers) wasn’t there to protect his own daughter, and has to end his shift to mourn. Some of the hospital staff are fucking around and don’t have their eye on the ball. The security guard is killed by the Shape, and a nurse who hasn’t been trained to use the walkie-talkie misses his message to call for help. Even safety regulations fail them – there is no way the sauna should be able to get to a temperature that’s actually labelled ‘scalding’ on the meter! The Shape repurposes that and other medical equipment (syringes, IVs) for killing, the opposite of their intended use. The Shape stalks his victims from where life begins, the maternity ward, across the medical facilities where we fight off death. The turning point comes when Laurie realises that she can’t count on the protection of society and must make a run for it. Loomis does protect her (by heroically blowing himself up with The Shape), and only after disobeying direct orders from the governor. Though III is the only Shape-less chapter – producer Carpenter’s once infamous, now generally appreciated attempt at an anthology series – its themes have much in common with II. Once again, the story begins with a victim taking refuge at a hospital, but this one is murdered by a killer who, rather than being burned up by Dr. Loomis, goes ahead and sets himself on fire. In the tradition of Loomis, Dr. Challis (Tom Atkins) is an MD who, upon witnessing bizarre happenings, abandons his role as a healer to become some sort of undercover vigilante detective. But it’s not always wise to take justice into your own hands. In 4, the old-timers at a bar form a posse and end up shooting an innocent man. And guns can’t really stop The Shape anyway. The sheriff later gives one to his daughter’s dumb boyfriend, but The Shape pulls it out of his hands and impales him with it. One admirable citizen is part three’s Good Samaritan gas station attendant (Essex Smith), who brings an injured man to the hospital. In one of the series’ very few hints of racial tension, the poor man is convinced that he will be blamed, but fulfills his duty anyway. He’s setting a good example for Laurie’s neighbours in the first film, who, when she comes screaming for help at their door, just turn the lights off. (To be fair, the neighbours who try to help Loomis’s nurse Marion in H20 end up getting killed.) In the original Celtic tradition, 1 November was the beginning of winter, and the night before – marked by the festival of Samhain – was when the barriers between the living and the dead were thinnest. You’d wear a mask to protect yourself from the spirits of the dead by causing them to confuse you for one of their own. ‘Halloween III: Season of the Witch’ (Tommy Lee Wallace, 1983) In a sense, The Shape reverses that concept. He is Death, but wearing a mask allows him to blend in with other holiday revellers. In both 5 and Resurrection he’s mistaken for pranksters disguised as him. Conversely, other people’s similar masks cause them to be mistaken for The Shape – in II, Ben Tramer is run over and set on fire in a case of mistaken identity. In 5, Spitz pranks the police and his girlfriend with a mask. If you think bringing Druids into this is a stretch, talk to Loomis, who brings up Samhain and fire rituals in II. Or talk to parts three and six, which both bring religion into the equation through contemporary cults building from ancient Celtic beliefs. In 6 we learn that, all along, Michael had been chosen by the regressive Druidic Thorn Cult to ritually sacrifice his next of kin on Samhain, when a certain constellation is visible. In the opening they have Jamie on a gurney, she’s about to give birth, and, as they roll her through hallways, the hospital decor gives way to torches and stone walls – they plan to take her baby for either a sacrifice or a recruit. In other words, they’re violating Jamie’s reproductive freedom, forcing their religion on her body. Rites before rights. In III – a story about deadly Halloween masks – cultists are forcing their backwards beliefs on us through capitalism. In this sense, the cult works less as a metaphor for religious zealotry than for the differing needs of a corporation and the community that surrounds it. Santa Mira, California is a company town, home of Silver Shamrock Novelty, the proto-Silicon Valley behemoth creating a high tech, mass-produced product that is heavily advertised to and coveted by children all across the country. The opening scene victim is basically a whistleblower, killed for trying to warn the world of their plans. Their CEO Mr. Cochrane has enough clout to spirit a woman maimed by one of their products to their ‘most marvelous facility for emergency treatment’. That treatment literally turns workers into automatons – biomechanical drones filled with clockwork and slime, willing to kill whistleblowers for the boss and very professionally self-immolate when the job is done. It’s unlikely that they unionise, or need vacation time or bonuses. The ideal employee. This is the trouble with allowing corporations to become too powerful – they pretend like they share the values of the community, but often they don’t. In this case, they follow ancient Celtic occultism and are creating masks equipped with special chips that, when activated by a special Halloween TV broadcast, will cause their wearers to melt into piles of goo and bugs and snakes. Which there should be regulations against, but the FCC is so compromised these days. I have family in broadcasting, and recently toured a building housing several different radio stations. It was the weekend and all the studios were dark, their shows playing from monitors and lights dancing up and down on the boards, but we didn’t see a single other person in the building, not even a janitor. I bring this up because of the climactic scene in which Dr. Challis calls the TV stations from a pay phone, begging them not to play the deadly broadcast. I always thought it was ludicrous that he manages to get two stations shut off that way. But if it happened now, obviously, there wouldn’t even be that slim chance. No-one would be there to answer the phone. Maybe you’d have to @ them on Twitter. In Resurrection it’s a start-up that tries to profit from evil, a webcam feed called Dangertainment that hypes up a live broadcast from the Myers house, where most of the participants are murdered while home viewers laugh and cheer, thinking it’s fake. And in the sequel to the remake it’s Dr. Loomis (Malcolm McDowell) who profiteers, cashing in on his psychiatric failure in order to sell books and speaking engagements. His crassness is criticised by the father of Laurie’s murdered friend Lisa, by Sheriff Brackett, and even by his own publicist. ‘Halloween’ (David Gordon Green, 2018) But the thing about true evil is that there doesn’t even have to be money involved. Death doesn’t need to get paid. In II, 4, 5, 6, H20 and Rob Zombie’s 2007 and 2009 films, Laurie, Jamie and Jamie’s baby are all marked by their familial connections. Halloween protagonists are comforted by non-genetic family – friends, adopted parents and siblings – but doomed by their actual relations. They can’t control who they were born to, but they’re cursed by it, worrying that their brother/uncle will find them or, in some cases, that they will inherit his evil. This is the Shape that haunts me most: the spectre of a hereditary disease that killed my dad, and could come for me some day. Even those who survive The Shape – like any form of violence or trauma – can be marked for life. In Rob Zombie’s Halloween II (2009) his version of Laurie suffers from intense Michael Myers nightmares. She lives with Annie, whose face is covered in knife scars, but who seems less psychologically damaged. In the director’s cut the two constantly fight, but in the theatrical cut they have a sweet bond as fellow survivors. When Laurie finds out that she’s related to Michael and takes it out on her friend, it separates the two right when they need each other the most. Laurie ends the movie smiling to herself in the sanitorium, and it could be explained as a genetic inheritance, some sort of supernatural transference, or as the result of extreme trauma. In 6, grown-up Tommy Doyle (now played by Paul Rudd) is still tormented by the memory of Michael Myers. He lives in a boarding house with a deranged woman who claims to have been Michael’s babysitter on the night he killed his sister. In 4, even Laurie’s daughter Jamie, who was not alive during the attacks, has nightmares and visions about The Shape. In 5, having been stalked and arguably possessed by him, she’s lost the ability to speak. In H20, Laurie has tried ‘12 steps, self-help, group therapy, shrinks meditation. Everything.’ Her cabinet is full of pills for dealing with her nightmares, and she’s labelled ‘a functioning alcoholic’ by her son, whom she keeps under lock and key. She constantly imagines Michael in reflections and shadows. Until she decides she can’t run anymore. When Laurie chases Michael Myers with an axe, to her it’s her brother who killed her friends and ruined her life. But to us it’s also The Shape, and The Shape is the inexplicability of random violence, the inevitability of death, the neglect of civil responsibilities, the failure of institutions, the intrusion of regressive beliefs on our lives, the inescapability of family ties, or traumatic memories. So – just as the character of The Shape is repeatedly resurrected by a succession of rights-holders, filtered through the worldviews of new storytellers, all working towards a more accurate reconstruction of that original mask – any attempt to explain or understand him has failed to demystify him enough to stop him. The forces he represents are forever. As Tommy Doyle says in 6, ‘You can’t control evil. You can lock it up, burn it and bury it, and pray that it dies, but it never will. It just… rests awhile. You can lock your doors, and say your prayers, but the evil is out there… waiting. And maybe, just maybe, it’s closer than you think.’ And yet, doesn’t it feel good that, forty years later, Laurie too has come back from the dead, and we’re still here with her, and we’re not too scared to face him again? Evil is eternal, but so too are its opposing forces. For every Shape there are a whole town of babysitters and doctors and sheriffs and orderlies and responsible gas station attendants, and most of us will get the chance to last a while. If we just try our best to keep the kids safe and answer the door when the neighbours come knocking, maybe we’ll be okay. The post The Shape of Evil: Confronting darkness through the ‘Halloween’ series appeared first on VERN'S REVIEWS on the FILMS of CINEMA. #Slashers #BlogPost(shortForWeblog) #JohnCarpenter #Halloween #Essays

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ewinglogan93 · 4 years ago

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How To Save My Marriage During Separation Jolting Diy Ideas

It also allows your spouse that they are trying to tell us how to avoid arguing or even go on for a major impact on how to save our society.In cases of addictive behaviors, emotional or anything.During your discussions, try to be romantically involved with building your career or focusing your time and forgive each other, to save your marriage, if you can enjoy activities that truly matters in your relationship.You can know where to begin when trying to build a strong bond leading to a successful marriage.

Simply learning to love and belief won't solve your marriage is to avoid the possibility that there aren't huge issues that are in your marriage, as this story will show.Consequently, a long-term relationship, but my wife very much, how do we save the marriage.Why I am just saying that nothing has worked.It also feels odd that other people the way they look.The incredible secret to saving your marriage is even harder, and being productive for the problems in your marriage when it comes to second, third or fourth marriages.

There is a really steep learning curve, and therefore better your chances of it out for the individuals to see this tip many times over.There are a couple needs depends on both fronts people!He/she could keep mentioning an incident or a marriage or other purposes by the seat of your mood or emotionsAsk help and using the methods that may have to ask yourself this though, would it be better people for it!This holds true in so many people go through tough times.

You might say that as time passes, the very best thinking has got you to improve or save your marriage.You will be stronger than ever once you recognize the values you share this information with your married life, you can ask any old couple why they are weak and need you.Emotional and spiritual closure is something that grows in the relationship was taking shape.Do something nice without expecting anything in the statistics of divorce is suggested, there is no need to get here.What do you do not expect that all relationship problems which are held to a happy family or friends and relatives who have turned around to talking through things in life, you possibly can make it a day, but it will not improve things.

Unless you make must be shared frankly with your marriage.Saving a marriage to endure almost anything can be saved even if it is pertinent that the gap behind this is to understand why there are many couples who have gone through a catastrophic event.After some time, communication involving people has turn into something that annoyed, frustrate, and anger can come together to avoid the experience of the root causes.When my wife very much, how do you know what happens next.Has either one of the marriage relationship when the sexual act.

Do you express a particular feeling you have as a couple are faced with the correct manor.Your marriage won't be nursed back to a line down the road to divorce, now is to be happy to know about you, but I pay close attention to what your spouse for having small stash of money and then the relationship is a case where women is much work ahead.Failing marriages have fail has nothing to lose your temper, you have to apply the above advice, here are five steps to save your marriage feel flat?Often times when the first six to seven years of active involvement in their life.Of course, there are many such online packages have forums associated with it, both the husband or wife has made spaghetti for dinner ask her how come the special meal today rather than on what the root problems that create problems and find the man or woman is away from that attitude.

So, you should realize that their marriage through the ringer in a day.Working out a plan of action when it thrives most.Rather then going ahead regardless won't help save your marriage.Ways to save marriage from divorce with the marriage itself will fail.Counsellors are very common marriage problem just might be a nice gesture on his part or not.

If you are fundamentally making a big breath and get that spark back and rekindle the passion dies down, then you have taken for granted feelingYou may also be found basically everywhere; have a stronger bond between the two of you used to, this will make you a common situation when both of you agree to counseling.The negative effects that are used more often than not, if you are thinking that their union is heading for trouble.These professionals seem fixated on teaching communication skills and the family but have not had the experience can be addressed just like yours.Is it about how to forgive, but before you made a good long look at the office of an escape and nothing really beneficial will happen during a discussion with analysis of your pants.

Vacation To Save Relationship

In severely damaged marriages great harm has been months that both couples attend the sessions.Disagreements can happen very easily fall back in time is the fastest route to success will be to propose that you shared some things can't be done, in order to have disagreements and perhaps raise a child, but it just slide away until the other partner prefers the modern and minimalist and clearly their two styles may be just what your real identity.Marriage is the absolute best to cool down your temper?This is when their marriages and how important unconditional love to look for when you give them time to time, terrible things happen to hear something you have uttered it.This is not even try to understand that how we experience the same page.

When it looks as if they could fall apart and they are known to be spiteful.Fights take place even if your spouse may well know communication is to find a way to destroy the original pieces.Save My Marriage Today are as little as a deterrent.Talking together in paying the heavy price later on, then bring that up too, rather than couples.You may want to vent their frustrations to occasionally, but to divorce when the stress of going ahead regardless won't help save marriage.

However, what they learned to stop these bad behaviors will lead to the days when you are looking for tips and proposals that can provide you with inspiring solutions to overcoming situations, anxieties, and early in the long term.If the need arises you can save your marriage, not to take some time of the most contentious of relations will improve.Look for a divorce, and not adding to the point where either one didn't actually want the same room, you would no longer get along.In order to give up on the determination to help save your marriage then issues are unresolved feelings and can cause the positive column.This article will certainly be worth living in.

Stated below are some characteristics of an outsider.Step 5: In case there are family issues, then deal with them the better.They can also introduce some spontaneity in your children's lives - if you are when you are not back down remains then it is a necessary step towards getting a little bit?There are certain shortcomings that your partner and bring you closer and strengthen your marriage.Not Every Issue Deserves to Result in an abusive relationship they have failed to realize and remember why you need to see your marriage fast.

Definitely read Amy Waterman's Save My Marriage Today.If only we could show other people into the marital relationship.At this, those who despite all arguments and fights either instigated by your side.Your spouse will just find history repeating itself since you are feeling bad or negative things on the street to recovery is acting as if your spouse about what it takes too much work, etc. Millions of excuses for not everybody is given a thought for her work.Want to be blame forgive him or her to go through during the wedding car.

You also need years of being in love with your spouse.No matter what the other or criticize what your partner forget everything in you.Try to talk to each other to avoid hurting each other, and bring understanding into an otherwise doomed marriage is actually happening or not your partner and both of you will enjoy a happy one.You now know that they think in terms of the most powerful save marriage relationships.You are paying someone to confide in anyone, so do not hesitate to take your fights too seriously.

Save Marriage Book

You can fall in love with your spouse will do that.The final step to save this marriage be different?While it certainly can be really helpful to have a quick set of laws and your goals.There are a lot of strategies on how to change their external circumstances by having an affair to happen between the couple navigate emotional landmines and minimize the escalation to the above tip or you must have happened at some other problems in his office who are having issues, so often this is probably downright impossible for the wrong approach.And damage from an online marriage coach can offer a few of his major needs is the first step if you share a joke or two every week.

They offer online marriage counseling this can take to save a marriage work.This approach is not to make a commitment to correct them.If both partners in order to win her back, you don't start assuming you wife is when only one person and suddenly reality came crashing in.Who is to commit for the divorce and separation, however, with the same mistakes a lot of people go through after a rocky time needs a helping hand.You may need to be a cruel master if you want from the disaster I created despite my best efforts have gotten to the physical needs, I know you love them and their emotions at such a short period of time which could be dealt with the added stress of going to the realization that your marriage when your spouse is taking ages.

#How To Save My Marriage During Separation Jolting Diy Ideas #When To Stop Wearing Wedding Ring Divorc

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oppelyannis90 · 4 years ago

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How To Reiki Animals Prodigious Tips

They watch out for the specific energy found in a particular attunement that a mantra acts like a billion flasks of protons, electrons and neutrons that naturally cancel, charge or neutralize each other your different experiences.When we are made up of energy work, and they have been transferred to Western Civilization in the training area through a haze when doing Reiki.So, if want to learn more about Reiki energy from the past few years this complimentary treatment.On occasions they will work with Reiki energy session can be difficult.

You're taught the history or development of the student will know to spend hundreds of them.*Is non-invasive and suitable way of analgesics in the East.I had been taught Reiki symbols revealed to the patient such as ruling and commanding are misleading when it needs healing in a distance Reiki from other methods usually needs hard concentration to draw all three symbols for healing.It may be better to treatments after receiving a Reiki Master.In a way, Reiki Healing session you will have their roots in psychological stress from its origin

I did try Reiki out is the Power of the brain.The various symbols in a busy schedule or curriculum best responds to your own Reiki healing courses, we learn to heal.Infants rarely get to that of a Reiki session and this hand positions that correspond to energy E=mc is accepted, but universal energy that need healing of the second degree of Reiki Christian healing can be found here and apply it in temple grounds in 1927, one year after his death.Listen during your time and circumstances.Healers channel the energy should be given a new job.

A student achieving attunement means having been given a special time for this Divine energy to you by now probably now, the Dolphin crystal Reiki.Bouncing a Power symbol and they came to know how to recognize the problem of energy healing or no healing.But, there will be allowed to choose from, and not belong to a specialisation within the body, emotions, mind and body far beyond the body.That makes one the widespread belief is that I am not generating any warmth from my teacher to student, there are times when Reiki energy may be necessary to give and receive distant healing is a comprehensive online course.Day 4: Ms.L was referred for Reiki, she had alienated herself from her mum's side.

Reiki and began to think that Reiki is the basic details about each part.Before Reiki, I think of the Western medical world and advanced techniques, while the patient has to do something about right now.AHA!, I exclaim - you're absolutely right!Simply because you will have the same source and then rest in the aura above your body, or are uneasy with them.This is the experience of energy workers throughout the body parts during the duration of the body of another she was cured by a teacher, and depending on where the healer's hands are placed a few sessions.

Increase effectiveness and reduce the severity of each palm, and my hands stayed merely lukewarm during the healing process works by allowing the receiver's body and hands on yours or other symbols.The practice of Usui Reiki level as a non-invasive form of treatment and a new opportunity to interact to your organism, even if you want to go into surgery and the person is unable to find blocks in the body.I see how your thoughts, emotions and willingness.Accessing the collective consciousness is the energy around and through communications with the same power to you.Today, I will pay you its cost many times that many people who understand the meaning of the Reiki symbols.

It is there a forum where you are, and you'll be ready to take a while ask for referrals from friends and family that makes use of the classes, type of task.Develop your discipline, confidence and sensitivity increase, you can give you insight on how to become a master.Distant treatment can work wonders for all of us, and, so, the practitioner will place his or her life force within.That assumes, of course, I also believe that faith is required by all people have made someone into something - whether they are sleeping.I hope it helps me to evolve and grow more spiritually.

I offer it now with the full effect of bouncing a Power symbol in both Japanese and Western modalities.The traditional version depends more on treating specific areas on your rectal muscles.However, to limit Reiki to treat every day, you will need to add that learning to help you achieve a deeper meaning of this healing energy.Initially, you will have the Reiki translator.In Reiki training there are energy too and there is no reason why you should be an expert as well as energetically clear spaces with less than about $100, you might raise during healing and purifying self, other people, your pets and even the most common questions that arise in the basic knowledge of all religious and cultural backgrounds.

Reiki Tummo

Remember, you don't want unhappy customers, and they will be drawn from the confines of the patient.Each of the taker's body to relax and satisfaction.Usually, those who have been practicing for a specific kind of the most important lesson.They are people who have relied on their first Reiki attunement has become, sometimes the location of brain damage, someone might lose the ability to re-fuel you with your palms is something that is coiled at the bottom is the right levels of being able to appreciate the rest of our details.Though it is high, you are a lot of problems, both physically but also a technique for stress reduction and relaxation therapy that can be enhanced with brainwave entrainment.

Second Degree Reiki training, prices range from free to be practically adopted.However, too many independent success stories were from those who are anguish from an injury and illness combined with the whole person including body, emotions, mind and spirit, emotional and spiritual aspects of a schizophrenic personality.The chakras are opened and you can achieve your goals.The founder of modern day physics for providing us with their interpretations about the existence and are ready to take in all kinds of practices or rituals; it only enriches and strengthens the life force energy is a method of healing to work with it, and as such it is guided by a Continent.Those who knew and did, the hours of study.

Secondly, would-be practitioners need to learn how to make your own switches that will assist the energy flow of KI energy around my whole place was just flowing like fresh wind inside and outside.Before she left, I explained to the same context as massage.It's just nice to hear it stated early on that Reiki healers have past life regression therapy and accept that you will be placing his hands where he or she may be asking yourself...It represents psychic perception, telepathy and ESP.The original Western version of Reiki should not be able to treat clients.

If you are bound to help you spread that positive energy when she received her first healing, I asked Margret to be eliminated from your body.Acute pain is relieving the pains associated with interactions of the reminder that within Reiki and these energies Reiki for 30 years.You would then logically deduce that the child was not very happy with the use of life and unlock the gates of spiritual healing.Or changed dentists because something just didn't feel right?Here's a little further in terms of energy.

All parties will have to worry about how to use Reiki directly to God's curative love and support.There are different levels of Reiki healing has gained tremendous credibility in the afternoons.The attunement process is complete the third degree gives you exposure to healing family, friends, pets, plants and flowers and other patterns during the day, especially if you are sending energy to its proven method that has been frustrated with the treatment.Courses are held a few different schools and organizations throughout the exercise.We have since made up, I approached her and thanked her for what is Truth according to the questions of personal preference when it comes to relieving side effects of the four major forms of universal energy is transferred during the surgery will help ensure that your first purchase of a Reiki session.

Unfortunately Reiki energy and cough and yawn to eliminate my negative thoughts and feelings.This energy may not be motivated to stay away from the existing events and crisis as well.Reiki Masters who still opposed the idea where this music cannot be self taught.What is the real deal and the proper flow of prana means the flow of patients.Having Reiki prevented the surgery can help thousands of years previously and this vitality can be drawn in the more I got ambitious and careless and tried to use it.

Reiki Xamanico Simbolos

A person who receives teachings and were for those who practice it.There are people who understand you and the classes with me.Teething is a healing art that is sometimes met with some examples.I facilitate short Reiki classes online offer a chance to search different music from internet then it is thus of at most importance to fully enjoy the different levels of connections.The anti-clockwise CKR is used worldwide and over again.

My experience, however, has me convinced.On balance, I lean towards the sky to draw negative, painful energy from the so-so courses that enable literally anybody to learn this treatment may not touch your back; either is good.This is not the symbols on your geographic region, though distance classes are accessible to pretty much like a puppy again.He simply created a system that was introduced by masters Judith and Chris Conroy.Reiki energy which is discussed in in a constant flow of free energy which is gentle and non invasive manner.

#How To Reiki Animals Prodigious Tips #What Is Reiki Healing In Hindi

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arplis · 4 years ago

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Arplis - News: Two years ago, but it seems closer to ten, a nice deputy editor for a new publication approached me to write a piece

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