#and ness is left reevaluating every moment they've ever shared and wondering if it was real at all
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the truth
#blue lock#blue lock fanart#alexis ness#ブルーロック#art#fanart#blue lock manga#my art#michael kaiser#in spirit#i think about scenarios where ness leaves kaiser#whether just to pass to isagi or for good#and i believe this is the key to kaiser's awakening#given that his “identity”/ego first appeared not out of malice but out of the desperation to protect the one thing he cared about (the ball#and of course his monologue in 260 about how he treats the ball explicitly parallels how he treats ness#which makes me believe losing ness or the risk of losing ness is instrumental in kaiser's reawakening#BUT.#kaiser is a deeply sad angry person and he cannot let the world know he's weak#so i fear that ness leaves him and instead of admitting oh maybe i do care kaiser snaps#because ness can't leave him if he pushes ness away harder right?#kaiser telling ness exactly what he was to him#exactly why he approached him in the first place#you're nothing but a dog#an experiment#because fury covers up the hurt (hurt that kaiser is even angrier that he *has*) and so the damage is done#so that's what this doodle is based on el oh el#and ness is left reevaluating every moment they've ever shared and wondering if it was real at all#(because even if kaiser did care he doesn't have the capacity to realize he did-- i do believe his behavior in 243 was genuine and proof he#-cares for ness in the only way he can he just does not understand that yet because he fundamentally does not understand kindness)#and he won't before it's almost too late
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