#and my thoughts on sexuality aside giving her a girlfriend out of a character we barely see and who has no chemistry with her

[mbilmey]

.

[maddogofshimano]

The Boss’s Date Coaching

oh baby it's another Goromi event! this one's a board game with Nishida as our protagonist

the board music was Receive You the Madtype

I thought it was kind of funny that they were squeezing another Goromi event in when her character story and past event already covered............. basically every single moment available in YK1! but that's okay.

because this one doesn't take place in YK1

as a brief aside on pronouns, I’m sticking with she/her for any references to Goromi. the term for boss Nishida uses for her, 親父, is explicitly masculine in the same way that patriarch in english is, but I’m not factoring that in for this translation

I will put a content warning that there's a brief attempted sexual assault in this, it's only a few lines and is resolved very quickly but it is there

summary: It is 2006. Goromi is waiting for Kiryu to arrive at SHINE to help out a hostess so she can (once again) surprise him. Nishida has a date coming up, and in her boredom Goromi decides she'll teach him the secrets of a woman's heart.

[2006] [After Kiryu Kazuma was released from prison….] (Tl note: the first time I completely blew past the fact that this said 2006 and not 2005. But I guess 2006 is technically after Kiryu was released from prison, so.) Goromi: ……Kiryu-chan, you're takin' so long~.

Goromi: Nishida! Are ya absolutely sure ya actually emailed him?

Nishida: Y-Yes! I'm positive I did...

Goromi: Then why ain't he come here? Nishida: Kiryu-san is… a really busy person, so… he must have gotten himself caught up in something…. (tl note: Nishida refers to Kiryu as Kiryu no ojiki, which is literally your uncle who is younger than your dad, and in yakuza terms usually means a patriarch less senior than your own. I'm going with -san for simplicity of showing he's being deferential)

Goromi: ……..Well, a burly guy like Kiryu-chan probably gets tons of invites. Goromi: But I got all this time to kill~. …Nishida, ain't there just nothin' interesting? Nishida: I-I guess so… Goromi: Kaaa~… When there's a girl this cute with nothin' to do, ya oughta be helpin' her kill some time! <phone buzzes> Nishida: …! (tl note: this is literally the first time Nishida has looked not extremely worried)

Goromi: Oh! Is it from Kiryu-chan!?

Nishida: N… No, it wasn't. Goromi: What the hell. Who's it from? Nishida: Umm… well… Goromi: …You're stallin'. Give it here! Nishida: Ah… Goromi: …"I had a lot of fun on our date on Saturday, Rina"… This is… Nishida, did'ya get yourself a girlfriend? (Tl note: it's not……….. it's not YK1 SHINE hostess and known lesbian Rina, right? it's a different Rina……. right???) Nishida: No, it's not that serious…! We just met when I went to a group-dating event the other day… Nishida: Then we emailed a little… and she ended up asking me out on a date… Goromi: Ohh~… Seems like she's into ya. What kinda girl is she? And what do ya think of her? Nishida: Umm… here's a picture from the group dating. Nishida: She's a really sweet, attentive, and kind, and we get along… I think it'd be really great if we ended up dating…

Goromi: ……… Nishida: …Boss? Is something wrong? Is there something strange about the photo? Goromi: …Just shocked. A beautiful lady like her is all but wasted on ya. Nishida: …Y-Yeah, I think so too. I'm not even sure why she ended up contacting me at all… Goromi: ….I got it! This situation calls for me to step in and help ya, yeah? (Tl note: Goromi is using "washi" as her personal pronoun here, which is what Majima usually uses when he's speaking as a boss, or "ore". Goromi usually goes with "watashi" but does use "ore" when Kiryu catches her off-guard) Nishida: Eh? Goromi: To make sure yer date goes well, I'm gonna teach ya all about a woman's heart! Nishida: Eh… Goromi: And I've got tooons of free time right now… aren't ya lucky~! Goromi: Hang tight! This is gonna be "the heart of a woman: lesson 1"! <Goromi leaves, presumably to make slides or get props or something> Nishida: I-……… I have a bad feeling about this… Nishida: I think my boss is just… doing something absurd to me to kill time while waiting for Kiryu-san to show up… (Tl note: lol this time it was actually -san. just gotta be EXTRA formal talking about Kiryu around Goromi, I guess) Nishida: No… it's bad to assume. It's possible that my boss might honestly be trying to help me… Nishida: …She said this was lesson one on a woman's heart… How many lessons is she planning? <scene transition to later> Goromi: …I've come~! And I've brought pleeenty of booze~! (Tl note: Goromi says お・ま・た～！ which I presume is a shortening of お待たせしました as in "sorry to have kept you waiting" but omata on its own is uh. it's vulva. it's vulva and that sort of crotch area. hence my translation of trying to get some kind of weird double entendre there) <sound of a cork popping> Nishida: Wh-Why are you filling that tower of glasses with alcohol… Goromi: I thought I'd show ya how to drink. I brought a buncha different kinds. Goromi: Sake, shochu, wine, whiskey, cocktails, plum brandy, beer, take your pick! Go on, drink whatever ya want! Nishida: A-Alright… Nishida: (…Boss… did say she was going to teach me about the hearts of women… so does that mean this is a test?) Nishida: (In that case… a cocktail is probably bad… that's something a girl would pick, I think…) (tl note: NISHIDA NO DON'T LOSE TO THE TOXIC MASCULINITY) Nishida: …Boss. I'd like a whiskey and cola to drink, please. Goromi: Ohh… Whiskey, huh…? Nishida: Well then… cheers. Nishida: (The way I drink will probably also be judged… the manly way to do it is in one shot…)

<horrible gulping sounds and the glass hitting the table> Nishida: …Thank you! Goromi: Oooh, yer a big drinker, huh? Goromi: Although… did ya notice anythin' strange? Nishida: Eh? Something strange…? Now that you mention it, the taste was a little bit peculiar…  <stomach noise> Nishida: My… my stomach's… Wh-What did you put in that, boss!? Goromi: Dumbass! You were so complacent ya didn't even realize that thing was fulla laxatives! Nishida: L-Laxatives!? Why did you.. guhh… Goromi: And now ya know lesson one of how women's hearts work: "I don't want to be with a man who would easily be poisoned to death!"  Goromi: If you're a man, ya gotta be cautious of anythin' that gets served to ya, cause ya could get poisoned!

Nishida: Th-That's… unreasonable… Nishida: (…I think my worries were correct… She's just using me for amusement to kill some time…) <stomach gurgling> Nishida: Ughhh… S-Sorry… gotta… bathroom… Goromi: …No can do. If ya wanna go to the bathroom, ya gotta beat up that guy. Nishida: …Eh? <footsteps> Beefy Majima Family Member: …Sorry, Nishida no aniki. Boss says I gotta.

Nishida: Y-You… Goromi: Now, after poisonin' ya, this ruffian's here to snatch your pretty girlfriend! Goromi: Nishda! Endure that stomach ache 'n win! Show Goromi-chan somethin' good! Nishida: Ughuugh… Y-Yes… boss!!!! Beefy Majima Family Member: Well… I hope you'll forgive me, Nishida no aniki. (Tl note: I did shorten that name to "beefy member" and then reconsidered)

<fight happens> <sounds of a toilet flushing> Nishida: Haa… Haa… Just in the nick of time… Goromi: Heh, ya gotta a lotta willpower to avoid havin' an accident like that, huh? Here, drink this so ya don't get dehydrated. Nishida: Ah, some water? Thank you, Boss. <drinking sounds> Nishida: …What the… it's a little bitter…? Boss, what's up with this water-- <Nishida hits the ground> Goromi: Dumbass! I just told ya, don't make it so easy to slip ya sleepin' pills like that! Goromi: …When ya wake up, I'm gonna train ya until ya can identify every kind of poison by taste. Buckle up, buttercup. Nishida: Uugh… uughhh… that's……. impossibleee…. <END PART 1>

[While waiting on Kiryu to finally arrive, Goromi learns of an upcoming date and uses her free time to instruct Nishida on the matters of a woman's heart.] [After drinking poisoned booze, Nishida has learned lesson number one, "girls don't want guys who are easily poisoned".]

Nishida: (Boss… She told me to wait outside for the next lesson on a woman's heart…)

Nishida: (This lesson comes after poisoning… What sort of terrifying part of the female psyche is she going to teach…) Goromi: I've come~ 🎶 (Tl note: yeah. yeah it's the same one. yeah) Nishida: Ah, boss. What's the next lesson going to… be? <Goromi appears with a whole army of goons> Goromi: A woman's heart: lesson 2! "Obviously I like strong men 🎶"! (Tl note: this is probably the same line she says to Kiryu about her type of man, but I'm too lazy to double check OR look up what she exactly said in english)

Goromi: A man's not a real man at all if he ain't tough! Now you're gonna tussle with these guys! Goromi: Smash up these ten opponents, and show a gal what she likes to see in a man! Nishida: No… this is… just the boss's pastime… Nishida: She said this was about a woman's heart… but this is more like training in a battle manga… Goromi: Let's get it rollin'! Get it done nice 'n quick! Goromi: Oi, everyone! No goin' easy just cause it's 10 on 1, I want everyone goin' all out against Nishida! Majima Family Members: Roarrrrrrrr!!!! Nishida: ….Crap… Guess there's no avoiding it…! Nishida: Haa… Haa… (tl note: THIS WASN'T THE OBLIGATORY FIGHT? I THOUGHT THIS WAS GOING TO BE THE FIGHT IS THERE ANOTHER??)

<a goon slides in> Nishida: !?

<Nishida gets smacked> Nishida: Guh…! <A new goon slides in> Majima Family Member A: Haa! Nishida: Crap! <Nishida steps away> Nishida: Haa… Haa… Nishida: (When there's this many opponents… while you're busy with one guy, another will circle around behind you…) Nishida: (They're not that strong if I can take them on one by one, but I can't fight them properly when they're in my blind spots…) Nishida: (What the hell do I do…) Nishida: …..! That's it….! Goromi: …Seems like ya figured it out. Goromi: Everyone! What're ya standin' around for! Go beat the shit outta Nishida! Majima Family Member A: Y-Yes! <scene change> Nishida: Yes… right here…

Majima Member A: Oi! It's too cramped to go together! Majima Member B: Shit… this is… too narrow! Nishida: (Yes… This narrow alleyway forces them to come down it one at a time…) Nishida: (Since I don't have to keep watching my back, this negates their numbers advantage in close quarters.) Nishida: …What's wrong, come at me! Otherwise it'll be the boss that's hitting you! Nishida: …Time to go…! Nishida no aniki! Please don't hold this against me!

<actual fight time where you do indeed take on 10 goons>

Majima Member D: Gahh…

Nishida: Haa… Haa… Somehow… I won… Goromi: Ya did it, Nishida! Now ya don't gotta be worried when ya get jumped by a buncha thugs!

Nishida: Um… I think I will still be worried… Goromi: Well, if they really wanted ya dead they woulda done ya in the first time you stumbled… Goromi: Eh, we'll call it good enough this time. Ya passed lesson 2 of a woman's heart, "Obviously I like strong men 🎶" ! Nishida: Th-Thank you very much… Goromi: Now, this will be the final thing I can teach you about a woman's heart… A woman's heart: lesson 3… Are ya ready? Nishida: Y…..Yes. Nishida: (Next is the final one, huh…) Nishida: (I figured that if she's just doing this to kill time, she'd get tired of these sorts of antics… but this is faster than I thought.) Nishida: (But I can't let my guard down. Lessons 1 and 2 were seriously absurd… What on earth will lesson 3 be?) <music changes to the more emotional soft track> Goromi: A question for ya. Right now… what do ya think Goromi-chan wants? (Tl note: I misread it as "what do you think of Goromi-chan" at first and was like, so scared to continue. I was shook by the possibility of Goromi emotional vulnerability momence)

Nishida: …Eh? Goromi: What's wrong? Answer already. I wanna know whatcha think I'm after. Nishida: Eh… Well… Nishida: (What do I say… The number one thing my boss would probably want is to fight with Kiryu-san.) Nishida: (But, that would be way too easy for this quiz… what the hell… what is it…) Goromi: …Figured out your answer? Nishida: ……….. Nishida: ……Sorry, I don't know. Nishida: I thought getting to fight Kiryu-san would be it, but… I'm not confident enough in that to commit to it. Goromi: …Ya got it. "I dunno" is the right answer. Nishida: Eh? Goromi: The final lesson on women's hearts: "Don't presume to know a woman when you're only looking at one side of her".

Goromi: Every woman has her own circumstances. Goromi: A woman who loves sweets can still have days where she wants something spicy, and there are women who will claim to hate what they actually like. (Tl note: .............................................................................hey when this is in direct response to Goromi's number one desire being a fight with Kiryu. there's. hmm.) Goromi: So, don't look at just one aspect of a woman and think ya know everything about her, okay? Goromi: Women are deeply complex, living beings, despite what men think. ...Got it? Nishida: Y-Yes...! I will take your words to heart! Goromi: ...Alright, good. I taught ya about the female psyche, so make good use of it on your date. Nishida: Y... Yes! Goromi: Well then, time to head back to the club. I got a feelin' that Kiryu-chan might be there soon.

<she leaves> Nishida: While the other two were obviously farces... it feels like that last one was surprisingly genuine. Nishida: Guess it makes sense, after she got tired of doing the absurd. But, that doesn't seem quite right... hmmm... Nishida: Still, something to make use of on my date... Nishida: "Don't presume to know a woman when you're only looking at one side of her" is good to keep in mind... Nishida: But "I don't want to be with a man who would easily be poisoned to death!" and "Obviously I like strong men 🎶" are-- Nishida: Maybe not as helpful... <END PART 2>

[I'm skipping the recap lol but today's the day of the date] Rina: Hehe, I thought the same thing during the group date, but talking to you is really easy, Nishida-san...

Rina: I was really nervous to ask you out, but I'm glad I gathered up the courage 🎶 Nishida: Oh, nah... I was worried we wouldn't be that good of a fit, too. Nishida: ........ Rina: ...? What's going on? You keep looking around the perimeter. Do you have a friend here? Nishida: Ah, no... it's nothing. Sorry, it's just nerves. Rina: Ah, no worries then! Really, I thought it was cute, you looked like a baby animal. Nishida: C-Cute...? Is that so... Nishida: (I can't tell her that I'm traumatized from my boss's training, and that I'm looking for a good spot to fight a pack of thugs...) Nishida: (Or that I'm being cautious about drinking the water brought to me in case it's been poisoned...) Nishida: (The boss's lessons on a woman's heart... my body sure remembers them, huh... ha...) Rina: Ah, that's right! Listen to this! I'm not making this up, the other day at the park, I saw a squirrel-- (Tl note: I thought that was just, the end of her sentence at first. she's just REALLY excited about squirrels) <scene transition to outside> Rina: Nishida-san, your recommendation of restaurant was delicious! I'm definitely bringing all my friends there 🎶

Nishida: I'm glad. I like going there because it's fairly cheap while still being delicious. Rina: Cheap and delicious restaurants are the best. I feel like it being cheap makes it taste even better, you know? Nishida: Ah, I get you! It's really a question of mood. This restaurant here is also good. There's this pork fried with ginger and grated daikon on top-- Rina: Hehe, you sure know your eateries Nishida-san. I'll have to rely on you next time I can't decide where to go eat~. Rina: ................So...... What are you doing after this? (tl note: NISHIDA SCORES?) Nishida: Eh? Umm... What am I doing. Maybe... getting drinks? Rina: ...Could we go somewhere to rest a bit? There's a place where we can talk slow and relaxed. (tl note: NISHIDA GETS SCAMMED?) Nishida: Eh? Somewhere to rest and relax? That's... Rina: Hehe... You'll have fun if you go. Come on. <another scene transition> Nishida: This is... the place?

Nishida: (BAR, huh... The hallway to the bathroom would be good to use if I'm outnumbered...) (Tl note: yeah the bar is named. BAR. in english. which is just great for translating) Nishida: (I'm still hung up on my boss's training, it really messed me up... I'm not the protagonist of a battle manga...) Rina: What do you think? I find it very relaxing, and since it's a hole-in-the-wall kind of place there's not crowded so you can really take your time and talk. (Tl note: very funnily hole-in-the-wall is fairly direct, the jpn being 穴場 or "hole place") Nishida: Ahh, you're right, this is a very relaxing place. Rina: Yeah. ...Hmm? Nishida-san, did you perhaps think it was something naughty? (tl note: well I sure did) Nishida: N-No... I-It's nothing like that...! Rina: Hehe, no need to panic. I just said it to make you conscious of it 🎶 (Tl note: struggling with the second sentence here, it's ふふっ、 慌てなくてもいいですよ。ちょっと意識させようと思って言いましたし🎶) Nishida: Eh...? Muscular Bartender: ...Are you ready to order?

Rina: For me, a kahlua milk! Nishida: Umm... How about... Barley shochu. (Tl note: 麦の水割り, which probably has a better word for it but that's my best guess) Bartender: ...Alright. Here's your kahlua milk and barley shochu. Rina: Well then, kanpaiii 🎶 Nishida: Ahh, kanpai! (Tl note: Nishida why do you say kanpai in full kanji you fucking dweeb) Nishida: (I keep thinking my boss might emerge from beneath the bar, so I'm worried about this drink being poisoned...) Nishida: (There's no way it's actually poisoned... though... hmm... there's a bitterness...) Rina: ...? Is something wrong, Nishida-san? Nishida: No... it's just, this tastes like the sleeping pills my boss made me take... Bartender: ....! Nishida: Yep... My boss made me take sleeping pills over and over, and this... tastes exactly like those sleeping pills. I don't know why it would be sleeping pills... Rina: IIII have no idea why that would be. Right, bartender? Bartender: ...Sir, we are an upstanding business. We don't take false accusations lightly. Nishida: Ah, no, I didn't even say you put them in there... Nishida: But someone could have put them in there to cause trouble for you, so the police should check the other drinks to be sure Bartender: ....Tch. Oi. <a bunch of thugs jump out> Nishida: !? Bartender: You all, this guy's making up lies about us. Shake him down for some apology money to make up for it. Nishida: No, I'm not accusing you of anything. All I'm saying is a quick confirmation-- Bartender: You all! Get him! Nishida: (They aren't listening... I'm getting the feeling that the sleeping pills weren't in there on accident.) Nishida: (I'm up against 4 opponents. If they surround me I'm done for..... that's it! I just need time.) Nishida: Rina-san! Hide in the bathroom! Rina: Uh... r-right! Bartender: Wait! Do you really want to hide somewhere with no exit? Bartender: ...What's the point...? Is he going to bunker down in the hallway... Nishida: I know there's no way out of this... Only Rina-san will be hiding. Nishida: (This narrow corridor in front of the bathroom, it'll force them to come one at a time. This is my only way to win.) Bartender: ...Heh... You went through all that trouble to run, only to go for a narrow hallway with no way out.

Bartender: You'll regret ever speaking a single false word about my drinks!!!!

<fight time>

Bartender: S-... stupid...

<he hits the ground> Nishida: Haa... Haa... That was close. Nishida: If I didn't make use of those tight quarters, I would have been a goner as soon as they got behind me. Nishida: All thanks to that training my boss gave me on fighting multiple opponents... Nishida: And the fact that I had to drink sleeping pilsl and laxatives so I'd know what they tasted like... that ended up being useful too. <the door opens> Rina: N-Nishida-san... are you okay? ...Eh!? You... beat all of them? Nishida: Yeah... somehow, I managed it. I think we should get out of here before they wake up. Rina: Umm, no... I'm... Nishida: ....? What's wrong? Rina: I-It's... it's nothing... L-Let's go. <back outside> Rina: ...Yeah, I had no idea it was that kind of establishment. I really never thought they would attack you and try to take your money...

Nishida: ...Hey, Rina-san. Earlier, why did you want to stay in the bar? Rina: Eh... th-that's... well... Nishida: ......... Nishida: ............If... If you're... an accomplice to that bar, it would be a good idea to stop doing that. Nishida: If you keep it up... I think you'll end up in a really bad situation some day. Rina: .....That's my choice, isn't it? Nishida: Eh...? Rina: ...Don't start talking like you're my boyfriend after one date! All you are to me is a source of revenue! Nishida: R-...Rina-san? Rina: It was me, I'm working with that bar, I took you there specifically to fuck you over! So? Happy now!? Rina: And now you've ceased to be useful to me. ...Never contact me again. <she leaves> Nishida: R-Rina-san... Nishida: ...I thought she was nice girl, too... Nishida: "Don't presume to know a woman when you're only looking at one side of her", huh. It's exactly like my boss said. Nishida: Boss... There's no way you expected all of this to happen, right...? Nishida: Rina-san went back to the store. I wonder... does she plan on doing the same thing again? Nishida: ............. <END PART 3>

Bartender: Shit... What's with that helmet bastard.... (Tl note: this is when I realized this was for real in 2006 and not a typo or a timeline mistake. which also means that Goromi hostess dates with Kiryu were a recurrent thing)

<Rina enters> Rina: .................. Bartender: So you're back... Why the fuck did you bring such a huge pain in the ass here? Rina: ......I already told you, this is was the last time. I'm done. Erase the photo of Keiko from your phone. (Tl note: name is 恵子 which has multiple readings) Bartender: What was that? Rina: The nude photo you took of Keiko and blackmailed me with! You said you'd erase it if I brought 10 people here! Bartender: Ain't happening. I didn't get any cash from that last one. You gotta do it again. Rina: That's bullshit! You all messed up, not me! Rina: If you try to make me do any more I'm going to the police, so hurry up and delete the photo already! Bartender: You really want your bestie's nude erased, huh. If so... going to the cops is going to be a problem. Bartender: So... <another goon slides in> Rina: !?

Bartender: I'll just have to get a photo of you next, so that doesn't happen. <goon grabs her> Rina: L-Let go...! Bartender: Just some nudity won't be enough for opposing me. We'll make an extra hard video... heheh. Rina: N-.... No-- <the door slams open> Bartender: !? <a punch lands> Strong looking man: Guh...

<he hits the floor> Nishida: ...I heard what you said. Rina-san, you did this all to help your friend.

Rina: N-Nishida-san... Why did you come here? Nishida: "Don't presume to know a woman when you're only looking at one side of her", that's what my boss taught me. Nishida: It was a really horrible feeling, when I thought I had been betrayed by a girl who seemed nice and kind. Rina: ........ Nishida: But, at the same time I had another thought. Fucking me over was just one aspect of you. Nishida: So I came here to see the whole picture and be able to understand it. Nishida: ...I'm glad I believed what my boss taught me. I would have regretted it if I left the situation alone, thinking I understood it. Rina: Nishida-san... Bartender: Heh, I get to see some cheap melodrama. It's real convenient you came back here, shithead.

Bartender: I was careless last time, but it won't happen again. You're going to regret coming back to rescue that woman!!!! Nishida: (This time I won't be able to make use of the bathroom hallway.) Nishida: (So far I've been able to scrape by thanks to my boss's special training...) Nishida: (But I wasn't taught anything for this situation. This will be a test of my own strength!) Nishida: I may not have any help from my boss, but... I will protect Rina-san, with my own power!

<fight time>

Bartender: Fuck... er...

<he hits the floor> Nishida: Haa... Haa... I... won... <Nishida also hits the floor> Rina: N-Nishida-san! <and he's back up> Nishida: ...I'll be fine... Quick, go delete... your friend's photo from his phone, please. Rina: Ah, r-right! <scene transition, police sirens wail> Nishida: ...Sounds like the cops are coming. Rina: Seems so. I'm... going to tell the police everything. I'm not going to run from my punishment. Nishida: You only did it because you were being threatened... I'm sure the punishment won't be that harsh.

Rina: ...Nishida-san. <she hugs him> Nishida: ...!

Rina: ...Thank you. Rina: My boyfriend is going to be mad that I'm saying this, but... you looked really hot... seriously, thank you. (Tl note: ohhhhhhhh I knew this wouldn't work out but RIP Nishida. he never scored) Nishida: Eh... <outside now> Nishida: ...Well, I guess she really has a boyfriend.

Nishida: But, it's fine. It's not like this kind of thing is about dating. Majima Family Member: Oh! Nishida! Are you okay!? I've been worried sick! Nishida: ...Eh? Wh-What? Majima Member: Lately, there's been a lot of nasty sleep-robbery bars. There was this picture of a woman floating around that we're supposed to watch out for... Majima Member: Here, this woman. And someone saw you walking around with her, so I got worried, you know? (Tl note: bisexual rebound time?)

Nishida: This is... Rina-san!? I guess she did say she'd done that a lot, so it makes sense there would be rumors... Majima Member: Hold on... You already knew? Nishida: Ah, yeah... But, she's washed her hands of it all, so could you please stop circulating that photo? Majima Member: ...Well, if you don't want me to, then I guess there's nothing more to be done. Nishida: I'm glad... Um, did that photo possible get shown to our boss? Majima Member: Hm? Ah, yeah he was shown it. About 3 days ago, I think. Nishida: 3 days ago... So all those lessons about a woman's heart from yesterday were... for this. <flashback> Goromi:  What kinda girl is she? And what do ya think of her?

Nishida: Umm... here's a picture from the group dating. Nishida: She's a really sweet, attentive, and kind, and we get along... I think it'd be really great if we ended up dating... Goromi: ......... Nishida: ...Boss? Is something wrong? Is there something strange about the photo? Goromi: ...Just shocked. A beautiful lady like her is all but wasted on ya. <flashback over> Nishida: (Now I understand that reaction... Boss must've realized who Rina-san was...) Nishida: (All those lessons about a woman's heart... In the end it was what saved me.) Nishida: (Was... all of that just so... I wouldn't get sleep-robbed...!?) Nishida: ...Do you know where our boss is right now? Majima Member: The boss? Pretty sure she said something about waiting for Kiryu-san at SHINE. Nishida: Thanks. <Nishida walks off> Majima Member: H-Hey. Nishida! (tl note: RIP unnamed Majima Family Member, he never scored)

<now at SHINE> Nishida: Umm... The boss is... there!

Nishida: Boss! Thank you so much! Because I kept all of your lessons in mind, the date today went perfectly! Nishida: Boss... You knew about what Rina-san was up to, didn't you... So you secretly did all that for my sake-- Goromi: ...Ooh, Nishida! Perfect timin'! Nishida: Eh...? Goromi: Kiryu-chan just came to the club! The plan was a massive success! Goromi: That surprised look on Kiryu-chan's face... Fun conversations leading to a fun fight! I had the greatest time!

Nishida: A-Ahh! Is that so! That's really great! Nishida: So anyways boss, about what I was telling you regarding the date... Goromi: Your date? What's that got to do with Kiryu-chan? Nishida: Um... nothing I suppose... Goromi: Then why would I wanna hear about dumb shit like that? Goromi: I'm busy draftin' up a plan for my next fight with Kiryu-chan! Ya better get plannin' right away too!

Nishida: Ah, r... right... Got it. Goromi: Hehe, my blood's already pumpin'! Now, what next to entertain Kiryu-chan~! (Tl note: "blood's already pumping" is 腕が鳴るでえ which is more literally "my arm is ringing/rumbling" or "I'm itching to put my skills to use") <she leaves> Nishida: (...Well, that's fine. No matter what the truth is, I'm certain that it's all thanks to my boss that I'm still alive.) Nishida: (More importantly... I need to properly return the favor.)

Nishida: Boss! Wait up, please! I'll think of something great too! <END>

and then here's all of Nishida's various thoughts on things from the board game:

Kiryu-no-ojiki

A man known as the Dragon of Dojima who is absurdly strong in a fight. He’s my boss’s very favorite. Only as a fighter, though...

Alcohol

Drinking alcohol is a great stress reliever! But you have to be careful not to over do it. You should drink rather than be drunk.

Boss’s High Heels

My boss wore these while working at a cabaret club and turned them into a deadly weapon. Getting kicked by them would surely kill...

SHINE

A cabaret club where my boss occasionally works as a hostess. The store has a good reputation, but the customers my boss serves must have a difficult time...

Boss

My boss. Occasionally my boss puts on a dress and works as a hostess, but there’s never been any complaints. Though, would anyone really push on that...

Butterfly Necktie

The necktie I wear while working as a waiter. It may look like a ribbon, but it’s actually very common in formal settings. 

Downtown Chinpira

Is this guy running shakedowns!? Bullying the weak is something only cowards do! Guys like this need to be taught a lesson!

The Majima Family A leading group within the Tojo Clan that's known for its violent conflicts. The family is a group of ruffians, I don't know why I ended up in it...

Majima Family Members

They're a violent and strange bunch, but if you take the time to really talk with them they’re surprisingly pleasant company. Well, they do still look scary...

Kamurocho

Painted in gaudy neon, it’s Japan’s number one entertainment district. The first time I came here, I was shocked at how many people there were.

and VERY FINALLY bonus stuff, namely the two cards! Goromi, the dreadful luck hostess, and Nishida, the mad dog’s errand boy.

this one was sooooooooooooooooooo long but also we got lore that Goromi was NOT a one-off event. which is so much more than I could have ever hoped for. I also love that Kiryu has apparently gotten the text from Nishida on multiple occasions and is shocked every time that Goromi is there waiting on him. and they still go on the date, every time

it’s not even rituals at that point they’re just using Nishida as a date coordinator with the flimsiest pretext in the world. this is that guy fighting the waffle house cook levels of pretext

[zootopiathingz]

My issue with Vaggie and her character

(TW: Opinion‼️)

I’ve been wanting to make a rant about this for a while and I’m sure other people have already done it, but I figured I might as well share my thoughts because I like to think my opinion matters to some people lmao. Anyway, I wouldn’t read this if you’re like a die-hard Vaggie/chaggie fan, but that’s up to you!

So I’m sure some of you by now heard the news that Charlie and Vaggie are getting another duet in S2 which apparently will be about their sex life. Which like, ok sure. In a show like this I expected a sexual-themed song to happen eventually. Here’s my issue with this though;

If you need to make an entire musical number about how much your main couple fucks, because of the severe lack of any hints of a sex life between them in the first season, then it’s not a good pairing, and this feels like a desperate attempt to give them chemistry that they just don’t have.

I saw someone say something similar on Twitter and I really couldn’t agree more. Some of you are going to say “you only say that because you don’t ship Chaggie!!” You’re right. I don’t ship them. Because there’s nothing there for me to root for. Like, at all.

Let’s start off with the fact that Vaggie has no personality outside of being Charlie’s girlfriend. I tried to like her character, I really did, but she’s honestly the most forgettable to me in the entire show. Some of you might disagree with me, but be honest and answer me this; can you name one interesting thing about her character that doesn’t involve her relationship with Charlie? And what she adds to the plot besides being Charlie’s “voice of reason”? (Which she’s not, she basically just gentle-parents Charlie into not doing things that Charlie wants to do)

Let’s take a look at some of the other characters in our main cast: Charlie, princess of Hell, desperately tries to help other people even when nobody believes in her cause. Alastor is a powerful overlord who’s supposedly helping out with the hotel, but clearly has ulterior motives that have yet to be revealed. Angel Dust is a famous porn star in an abusive relationship with his employer and is on a path to redemption himself. Husk is a former overlord who lost all his power to his gambling addiction and is now being forced to play bartender. Lucifer, the king of all Hell, a fallen angel who lost his will to dream, a shell of his former self. For fuck’s sake, even Lilith—whom we have yet to even hear speak—has a more compelling plot; she’s been gone for seven years, she’s in Heaven having made a deal with Adam and we have no idea why.

And what does Vaggie do exactly? She gives Charlie advice, she helps run the hotel, she.. occasionally threatens to hurt people with an angelic weapon (you know, the thing that kills souls for good?)

Ok so she’s also a fallen angel—a former exorcist in Adam’s army that leads to exterminations. Now that could have been an interesting plot point. It does explain a little why she’s so aggressive and skilled in combat. The scene with her practice-fighting Carmilla for answers was probably the most interesting scene that prominently features her. And even then, Carmilla kinda steals the spotlight for me, as I’m actually way more invested in her character and her background (seriously, why is she so knowledgeable about angelic weapons and Vaggie—the literal former angel herself—isn’t?)

This was honestly a twist I didn’t see coming, and it had so much potential to add more to Vaggie’s personality and character as a whole. Seriously, losing her wings and her fucking eyeball must’ve been severely traumatic. She might hold some grudge against Adam and Lute for abandoning her and tossing her aside like she was nothing, even after all that work she put in to be one of the top exorcists. She could maybe miss Heaven and even if she’s content living in Hell, a part of her will still always long to go back to what was once her home.

…But no, the entire reason she’s a fallen angel is just to create conflict between her and Charlie. And that barely lasted a whole episode.

Again, everything about her and her ‘personality’ all narrows down to Charlie. Not only is this a terrible foundation for the main couple of the series, it’s also just extremely unhealthy realistically speaking. Even episode 3 alludes to the toxicity of Vaggie thinking she has no purpose outside of helping and protecting Charlie. And I find it funny that Charlie is so taken aback, but she doesn’t actually say anything to correct Vaggie, because…it’s true.

It’s very frustrating for me to say this. Vaggie had so much potential to be at least a somewhat interesting character, but instead she’s always resorted to being Charlie’s partner/sidekick. Ik this has a lot to do with Vivziepop being terrible at writing female characters but imma be real, even Loona interests me more and they almost have the exact same traits (grumpy, aggressive, insecure, etc.)

I’m gonna try and wrap this up the best I can. Honestly guys, ship whatever you want but for me, Chaggie just has no appeal at all. For the first four episodes, I didn’t even know they were a couple. I assumed Vaggie had some sort of unrequited, unhealthy crush on Charlie. Hazbin Hotel’s writing is already kinda bad to begin with, but if I can’t tell that your main female leads are in a romantic relationship within the first few minutes of their screen-time, that’s really saying something. And I understand wanting more wlw relationships in media, but having two female characters together just for the sake of having a wlw relationship in your show is not good representation. You need to actually have chemistry between them, you need to make them compelling characters as individuals, and sadly Vaggie is too one-dimensional that, on her own, she has nothing going on, and I’m not rooting for her and Charlie.

And I’m sorry but I can already tell I’m going to cringe so hard at this ‘sexy’ duet between them next season💀

[technologyculturedneo]

SOS: Poison In My Mind (Pt 2)

Continue off from: SOS: Poison In My Mind (Pt 1)

“We met in the worst circumstance possible, but yet, even if we had to meet in different circumstances, I’d still fall for you.”

SUMMARY. While Jeno and Renjun put their pasts behind them and look onwards disowning their brothers, Donghyuck and Mark try to do things the right way, but find themselves in hot waters with the law. They all want to move on, but it seems as though fate has other plans.

PAIRING(s). Delinquent!Mark, Felony!Haechan, Boyfriend!Jeno, Brother!Renjun; Policeman!Jaemin, Jisung; Husband!Chenle, Boyfriend!Jaehyun X OC Dae, Yezi (original character)

GENRE. Angst. Longshot. Slow burn. Crime. Strangers to lovers. Smut (non-consensual/consensual). Family.

WARNINGS. Drugs abuse (Alcohol, smoking, marijuana, cocaine, heroin). Sexual content (consensual, child abuse, pedophile). Slow burn.

Areum doesn’t come to school on Friday as well as on Saturday. Donghyuck is partially worried that something bad might’ve happened to her, and so when he gathers up enough courage to inform his mother of his concern, she tells him that her Areum's mother called in sick to say she wasn’t feeling well.

Donghyuck can’t say much as Areum doesn’t show up again on the next week. He can only hope that she’s okay, and it begins burning inside of him of what he should do, because at this point he so desperately wanted to tell someone about what the Uncle has been doing to the girl. If he told anyone at the school, they’d surely not believe him because it was a personal and family matter and didn’t involve him.

Aside from worrying about Areum, he also began worrying about Mark. Mark hadn’t gone back to his old ways, but he picked up on a suspicious habit of always stalking Jeno and his alleged girlfriend. According to Mark, he saw Dae, the rich girl (the girl whose house they broke into) and Jeno give each other kisses and immediately knew that they had something going on. It had Donghyuck curious, but at the same time fearful of what his friend was going to do. So sitting down one afternoon together in the park, they’re both eating some bread while watching people pass by. Donghyuck takes the opportunity to address his friend.

“How’s your stalking journey?”

Mar sighs. “Wild.”

Waiting for Mark to explain, Donghyuck doesn’t say anything. Yet upon the silence intensifying he turns his head to Mark. “Wild how?” Mark looks like he’s in deep thought as he’s eating on his bread. He shrugs his shoulders. “Come on man, you’ve been at it for some days now. Following them and updating me on their life. How did things get wild?”

Mark blinks and looks to Donghyuck. “He’s got your eyes.”

Donghyuck tries to decipher the words, but they make no sense. “He’s got…my eyes?”

“You know,” Mark chews on his last bread before sitting up properly and turning back to his people watching. “He doesn’t drink anymore, doesn’t zone out like a drone, and now he makes decisions for himself. Whereas in the past he always depended on me. I don’t know man,” Mark brings his knees forward to wrap his arms around them. “Seeing my brother looking perfect while being with her makes me feel….”

“Like a fuck up,” Donghyuck leans his back against the tree trying to understand Mark.

“Nah, seeing you makes me feel like a fuck up. I should’ve stayed in prison. This life is not for me.” Mark snorts out a little laugh. “But seeing my brother makes me feel like this life is for him.”

“Mark don’t be like that,”

“I don’t belong out here, I mean, what’s the point of freedom and living like shit? Or going day by day eating bread?”

Donghyuck pats Mark’s back. “Mark I’m sure there’s purpose in your life if you look past your mistakes,”

Mark sighs before closing his eyes and turning his head to the side to get some sleep. He was going through the stages of grief and he hated it. First it was denial of what his life had come down to. And then it was anger that he couldn’t do anything else with his life. And then he began bargaining with whether or not he deserved to be free or not. Before the depression sunk in that even if he were to be locked up it wouldn’t do anything to him. And finally he accepted that his life was really shit and that he had no will in him.

So the next morning comes, and of course Donghyuck is already gone to his work, leaving Mark to wonder around back to Jeno’s apartment and watch from afar how his brother and ‘girlfriend’ leave their apartment together and go for their daily stroll. He follows them being several feet behind until they land up in a secluded park. As he’s sitting down on a bench and watching them work out together with smiles on their faces.

Jeno this time is in control of their activities and does stretches here and there. It makes Mark smile seeing his brother looking so free, happy and sober without a care in the world. Jeno looks especially happy when she smiles at him and plants kisses on his temple. Whatever they’re doing and talking about makes Mark feel like he needed to protect his brother from anything destroying and disturbing their peace.

So as they’re done working out and begin to head back home, Mark follows behind them ensuring they get back safe. Time flies by with the sun beginning to set, and it’s not until Jeno leaves the house and takes the red car with him does Mark feel that he should head on back to the park where he and Donghyuck rested. But upon seeing Dae leave the house moments later, he cautiously follows her. It seems like she was just taking an evening walk without Jeno. However, it’s alarming because Mark notes that as he’s following Dae, another guy also seems to follow her.

She’s not aware, but Mark is. Upon seeing the hooded frame of the person following and getting closer to her, Mark quickens his pace making sure that this person isn’t seeking to hurt her. And just like Mark predicted the man immediately grabs a hold of Dae and drags her into the alleyway. Mark is quick in running in and stepping in. Dae tries screaming but it doesn’t sound too loud, as the assailant has a knife to her throat. She puts up a fight, alarming the guy to be sharp when trying to get her to stop moving. Dae doesn’t stop, using the self-defense lessons Jeno taught her.

But still Dae is in frantic heaps of fear when wondering how long will she need to do this for. This guy is bigger than her and buffer then her. When seeing another man appear she screams. "Help!”

“Hey! Let her go!" Mark not needing to be told twice sharply steps in and lands a crossed punch on the other man's cheek- Dae is free of his hold and moves away from the man seeing the stranger gripping onto the person who held her captive.

Getting a look at his face, the stranger who helped her she gasps. But he glares at her. “Run!” And with that she begins running as fast as she can. She doesn't look back, doesn't try to see the face of the man who helped her. She hears a loud scream but adrenaline takes over her and all she does is run back to her home. As soon as she gets home, she's quick to call the apartment security to alarm them of what happened. No sooner than later, she hears the sirens and breathes out normally.

Hopefully the person who stepped in didn’t get hurt badly and that the security got there on time. She just can’t believe that it was him…Mark.

S2: EP16 -20

[Dae's residence. 2 weeks later]

"How can we be out of milk so quickly? I bought 4 whole packs," Dae sighs, closing the fridge when remembering Jeno's excessive intake on his milk and egg yolk mixture. She walks to the pad stationed on the kitchen counter. A 'to do' grocery shopping list. Not just any tea, but green tea with herbal and ginger spice. Herbal medicine is the best medicine. After boiling water and making fresh green tea she heads up the stairs to her shared bedroom.

"Baby you awake? Bae?" she calls getting in the room taking careful steps making sure to not step over the tissue boxes on the floor. She sits on the edge of the bed while placing the tray on his bedside folding her arms when Jeno shifts around pulling the blankets over his head like a child.

"I'm still sleeping," He mumbles out.

"You're such a baby," Dae says nudging his side resorting to tickling him knowing he has a very hard yet soft body when it comes to tickles.

Jeno erupts out an unexpected laugh before groaning out while still chortling painfully under the blanket whenever she pokes his side. He reflexes instantly by coming out the blanket getting a hold of her hands- causing her to stop with an amused face. He tiredly smiles with his eyes slightly open. He yawns and with the early morning stress he has, he gently brings her on top of him adjusting her position over him as she straddles him. Dae giggles running her hands over his hair, neck and shoulders. Jeno turns his head to the side seeing the light pigmented tea.

"No milk?" His cheeks puff out yawning out a little. He dives in for a morning kiss but Dae moves backwards shaking her head. "Don't I get morning kiss?" He asks mixed with a little cough.

Dae laughs. "Morning kisses with you lead to more than just kisses. And, you've got a cold coming on. So no. Plus you finished all the milk with your home made power protein drink," she gets off him sitting crisscrossed as he sits up getting comfortable by the dashboard. She holds onto his hand while he ruffles his hair with his other hand.

"I just wanted a kiss," he grumbles. "No milk, no kiss, is this what life has come down too?"

Dae rolls her eyes, patting his cheek. "How'd you sleep? You were coughing a lot last night," she informs. He shakes his head parting his hair from his eyes.

He picks up the mug and brings it close to his lips. "Hot," he mummers and puts it back down. "Something was clogging up my throat at night," he explains. "Must've been yesterday's photoshoot,"

"Were you shooting outside?" Dae questions placing the mug back on the plate.

"Mhm," He nods his head wrapping his arms around her waist. "The location of the houses your dad built were far, set in windy places. But this hasn't happened to me before," he says trying to kiss her again.

"There's a first time for everything," She blocks his attempt at another kiss with a playful smile and gets off the bed. She kisses his forehead bringing up the blanket over his shoulder. "Keep warm baby, I'll be back a bit later."

"You off to work?"

"No," She shakes her head playfully winking. "I called in sick. I'm gonna go down to the pharmacy and get some syrup. While I'm at it I'll buy some groceries too. Please stay put, don't go anywhere. I'll be back soon." she smiles at him. Covering his tea, he uses his hand to bring her back to him where places his lips over her lips. She finally gives in and he moans into the kiss.

She chuckles in between the kiss, "Do you want me to get sick?" She whispers.

Jeno laughs and lets her go, "Sick with my love of course,"

“Get some rest.”

With that the front door shuts, indicating that she’s left the house to run some errands. Unlike her words for Jeno to get some rest, Jeno gets off the bed and begins getting ready for the day. Originally today was supposed to be his day off and Dae was supposed to be at work. So it’s a bit unraveling for Jeno that she didn’t go to work – reason being, because on most day offs, once a month he’d have an appointment with Officer Na Jaemin. He didn’t like keeping things from Dae, but when it came to matters concerning his verdict checkup, or even issues concerning his brother Mark, he preferred for Dae not to know anything. That part of their relationship was still a bit of a touchy subject. He hopes she won't be around for when Officer Na Jaemin comes around. No sooner than later, as soon as he's done changing and goes to his little study room to edit the photo's he took yesterday- there's a knock on the front door.

Wiping his nose with some tissue, he goes over to the front door unlocking it. "Officer, where the hell have you been? I've been waiting since yesterday?" Jeno welcomes with open arms.

"Jeno," Officer Na greets with a polite smile getting into the hug. Never in a million years would he think that he'd become well acquainted with a former convict. As Jeno went to county jail- Jaemin from time to time came for round up checkups. Within those days of keeping up with him, he ‘sort of’ started getting to know the boy better. "A police never gets a day off, you should know that by now," Jaemin jokes taking a seat on the couch with Jeno following. "Especially with Jisung as my partner."

Jeno chortles. "Aren’t you and Jisung getting along?"

Jaemin nods his head. "I don't even know what getting along means at this point. But we're close enough. He asked me to watch his frog."

"Frog?" Jeno is taken aback before laughing out slightly.

"Anyway," Jaemin leans forward picking up the sweet wrapper on the table. "Is there a reason why you wanted me to come here instead of our usual morning spot?"

"Dae's coming back any time soon, and she wanted me to stay put,"

"Mmm the Miss," Jaemin wiggles his eyebrows with a naughty smirk- before Jeno hits his side. "She's one lucky woman, is all I'm saying. Any who, I thought you called me over here because of your brother. I’ve got some news on him. Do you know what the doctor said?"

Jeno turns serious and shakes his head. "His legs are fucked up pretty badly, so now he’s on a wheelchair. They need me to watch over him as his brother. I mean with the way the doctor said it, I had to agree to look after him. Problem is, I haven’t even told Dae about it. She freaked out the first time he came over. In her head, she can never forget what Mark did to her when he was alone with her.”

“I can only imagine.” Jaemin sighs out. “Has he come over before his injury?”

“No. Not even a call, nothing out of the ordinary. I asked Dae to start taking up most of the house errands just to avoid Mark coming by and she’s around. He traumatized the shit out of her, so I can’t let her see him again.”

“I was supposed to come yesterday to inform you of his release but you were occupied. Unfortunately, they’re going to discharge him in half an hour. As his parole officer I have to bring him to the comforts of a relative that will look after him. That’d be you. I’m glad you agreed.”

“Even though I agreed, Officer Na, you have to understand me when I say I can’t take him in. Can’t he just go to Donghyuck or something?”

“I know what you’re saying, I can even understand why you don’t want him in your life again,” Jaemin says. “But they’re letting him go in an hour and he needs a place to stay. He and Donghyuck been living out in the streets like homeless people ever since they got out of prison. Taking him to Donghyuck would be like abandoning him. I doubt Donghyuck would even want to take care of him. He’s on a wheelchair and he can’t take care of himself. Come on man, the worst he could do is roll over your toes. I believe he can’t hurt you or Dae in the state he’s in. If you like, I’ll come by and do regular check-ups.” Jaemin gives all his best commitments. “I’ll even talk to Dae if you need me too.”

“Roles have reversed since we saw her family. Her dad wanted me to quote on quote man up for his daughter if I want to continue seeing her," Jeno mumbles. “I’ve taken up a lot of the responsibilities. I pay house rent, I’m working so many shifts, provide a lot more for us and I’m trying my best to keep her safe. I want to keep her safe at all costs. Mark being here is a gamble that I’m not willing to take,”

"Still can't believe you're with her," Jaemin laughs a little, trying to shift the topic away from Mark just for a bit. Just until he can get Jeno to accept. "You should've put a ring on her finger by now." Jaemin jokes. "You turned a rich girl into a house errand girl? Even your brother will acknowledge that he shouldn’t mess with you. Speaking of which, are you still planning to propose?"

"Fuck," Jeno's eyes lights up as he sits forward, a smile growing shyly on his face, making Jaemin beam for his friend. He's been planning to propose for some time now. "Ever since speaking to her family, I’ve been making preparations. I ordered a ring last month and I'm getting the ring this Sunday. I can't wait for the day to come. We're having a family dinner with her family next week Friday, and I wanna talk to her dad about it."

"Her dad?"

Jeno nods his head taking in a deep breath. "Sounds fucking scary, I know. He's…tolerated my presence enough- dude, he literally asked me the other day to schedule a weekend where I'll be free so he can take me around his new buildings so that I can do my magic and take photo shots. At this point, I see him more than Dae does. Jaemin- wait, did I tell you that he asked me to join him every Thursday's for golf? I went out with him yesterday and it was a whole club of businessmen taking shots. As scary as it sounds, he's finally accepting me. Well it's what I think. And Mark will just fuck everything up,"

"And you proposing to his daughter won’t?" Jaemin asks with a bewildered face. "I was with you up till now. If you can show her family just how serious you are, they’ll consider you as a potential suitor. If you can show her family that you can take care of your brother and that you have him in check, they might just feel safe in allowing their daughter to marry you-"

"I can't help it. The desire is burning in my heart- my soul. I need to marry her- I need to propose now. We've been together for 3 years and a half month and I love her. My hands itch whenever I don't see a ring on her finger or even whenever I take her out and just have to end it with a kiss- dude no. There are so many guys out there who still hit on her as if she's single. I don't like having to explain every time that 'hey she's my girl' I want to make it official with a symbol,"

"That's a fucking grand commitment. Oh god you're burning up," Jaemin withdraws his hand from his face. "Look, I'm no expert at romance, however, I think you should wait and not rush into anything that's too- for crying out loud are you even listening to me?"

Jeno stubbornly places his finger over his ear drums and shakes his head. "You don't know what you're talking about. And on top of that, I see you’re testing the waters with Mark. I’ll think about it.”

“You only have 30 minutes to think about it, because I already told Jisung to bring him over here,” Jaemin speaks quick causing Jeno’s eyes to widen.

“What?”

Dae scans each shelf and medicine, looking for another cough syrup since the one they usually buy is out of stock. In her trolley there are different kinds of medicine, from vitamins to stress relievers to pain killers and even energy boosters.

"Hi Miss Dae, what a surprise seeing you here, how can I help you today?"

Dae turns her head to the side seeing a man with all smiles and a uniform, the service guy who constantly helped her. A worker trying to shoot his shot with her- no matter how many times she's rejected him.

"Oh, hi Shotaro," She gives him a polite smile flipping her hair behind her back. "Grandpower is out of stock, so I'm looking for an alternative to it. Which one is better between Cough Care or Mad Lemon?"

"Oh Mad Lemon as said here in the back label, works effectively in the body and rapidly, one spoon and you're zipped to wellbeing. Cough Care works as fast but it requires you to take it on set times," the salesman, Shotaro finishes. Clearly he's not that knowledgeable on the medication but Dae still asks.

"Are there any allergy reactions I have to watch out for? My boyfriend is sensitive to some ingredients,"

As always Shotaro is stunned that she still has a boyfriend- but regardless he puts his best salesman promotion talk on and talks about the allergy reactions. For crying out loud this isn't even his department, but he just wanted to speak and talk to her. As he's talking, Dae's eyes catch a certain head shape. The man's hair is black and it's cut shortly, but for some moments when the person turns his head- her eyes widen.

"-yes ma'am?"

She breaks out of her thoughts, "Yes, yes thank you," she smiles taking the medication focusing back on the short haired male. He's dressed in black faded pants, a white t-shirt and brown pullover that's torn in some places. The last time she saw him, was in the court where he was a bandaged mess and was practically sent back to his country to serve his sentence. It gets sadder when Dae thinks of all the times she was mean to him in varsity.

The man is skinny but anybody would recognize him by his facial structure. He was usually on the bright and positive side, however, seeing him now, his face looks strict and mean. He finally turns around making Dae's eyes pop wide.

It's him.

"Holy crap." She lets out. "Renjun?"

At the sound of his name he turns around spotting the owner of the voice. A beautiful lady in a knee white fitting dress. At first he thinks his vision is messing around with him- because why would a lady as elegant like that call his name, but then when the radiant woman makes her way towards him with her trolley he realises that she's real. And he realizes who it is.

"Shit." He mumbles lowly still looking a like a deer caught in headlights. Out of all people to see, the last person he wanted to see is Dae and her rich family. He's been through so much because of them. As she draws closer he shakes his head arranging his face fast. "Dae?" he calls allowing for the forced tight lipped grin to spread on his face. "It's a surprise seeing you here." He bows his head still being civil, despite his discomfort. Why the hell is she greeting him with a smile? Didn't she have a strong distaste towards people like him?

Dae gladly bows greeting him with a modest smile. "It's a surprise seeing you here," Dae retorts to which Renjun chuckles with a hesitant grin.

"I guess we're both out of our element zone." Renjun wraps up quickly. "Well, I should leave you be so-"

"Wait, let me get your number quickly,"

"M-my number?" Renjun squawks and shakes his head. "N-no, it's cool-"

Already taking out her phone, Dae panes her eyes to him noticing his whole stance. He's uncomfortable and looks like he wants to get away. "Am I making you uncomfortable?"

Renjun looks around before scratching his head. "It's not that. It's just, your…family put a restraining order and yeah. I could get in serious trouble for being here with you-"

Dae's eyes widen when realizing and remembering the court case and how things went down and ended. "Oh…"

"Yes." Renjun feels relieved once he says that, and grips his trolley. "Well, it was good seeing you-"

"Hold on you didn't give me your number,"

Renjun's eyes widen but he tries not to curse. "Dae," He breathes out. "I've been out of prison for 3 years now. I'm not looking for any problems with the police authorities, neither am I looking for means to go back or get locked up again. Because of going to jail, my life has been torn to pieces. My scholarship got revoked, and I can't apply as a normal student in my old institute or any institute for that matter. No college will accept me, no job will grant me a position- there's nothing I can do to clear up my name unless I'm lucky. And I haven't been so lucky these past few years. So no. I don't want your number and I don't want to give you mine. I do not want anything to do with you. So I'm asking you- respectfully, leave me alone."

Dae's mouth is frozen in shock as she watches Renjun pick up his own basket and walk away as fast as he can from Dae. He really didn't want anything to do with Dae- and for her, it's been a while since she's been rejected by a person. None the less, she doesn't follow him or make any more contact with him. Him using a different isle and avoiding even walking in the same place, is only clear to Dae that he's dead serious when stating how he doesn't want anything to do with Dae.

Unfortunately, fate has other plans when Dae joins a que to pay and Renjun is in front of her. She doesn't say anything to him, neither does she breathe in his direction as she waits for her turn. However, when Renjun starts fidgeting around, scampering his hands all over his pockets- Dae looks between him and the cashier as she 'patiently' waits for him.

Renjun lets out a low curse when not finding his socket card holder in any of his pockets. Did he leave it at home? No, he clearly remembers taking it because he reminded himself thousands of times to take it. So now where is it? If he can't find it, he's doomed. He didn't bring any cash with him. Trying not to take up the line, he shifts aside when the cashier notes that while he's still searching for his card then she'll continue with the other customers. He had two options now, because clearly his card wasn't with him. So it's either he shamefully returned all the items back to their shelf and went back home to search for it, or he could call his mum or Donghyuck to come and help him. But Donghyuck's working. He'd have to call Donghyuck- because his mother was fasting and praying and Donghyuck could probably excuse himself quickly. Problem is ever since Donghyuck came out of prison, neither of them actually spoke to each other. Well, Donghyuck tried, but Renjun didn't want anything to do with his 'brother'.

The cashier is done scanning all over Dae's items and places them in the plastic bag. Dae takes a deep breath, clearly feeling bad for Renjun. He's just standing there with his hands to his hip and his head down. She's about to lay a hand on his shoulder, but his reflexes are so fast that Dae nearly falls forward.

"Don't touch me."

"Sorry," Dae modestly apologizes running her sweaty hands on her dress. She was nervous. "Let me pay for you."

"No." Renjun shakes his head, deciding to call on his brother. He looks up to Dae, attempting a smile, but it's stiff. "Thank you though,"

"Geez Renjun," Dae sighs out in exasperation. "I just can't bare you standing like that and looking distressed taking up the line."

"I'm fine." He comments almost immediately.

Dae huffs silently. "Why are you being so stubborn? It's not like I'm asking you to do anything? I just want to help."

"I don't need your help."

Renjun places his phone over his ear waiting for his brother to pick up. Meanwhile Dae takes her credit card and hands it back to the cashier. "I'll be paying for him." She smiles with irritation, ignoring Renjun, who's eyes widen as he watches the cashier swipe on Dae's card.

"I said-"

"You're welcome." Dae interrupts picking up her own plastic bag. "Take it or leave it. Bye. Have a nice day." Her tight lipped smile is all that Renjun sees before she moves past him with two heavy bags of plastics.

Dae's gone by the time the cashier is finished placing all his items in the plastic bag. He thanks the cashier before leaving the que and the store. He stops in his spot when he sees Dae standing in place with the trolley of many plastic bags. He's about to ignore her and walk past, but she stops him in place by waving his- his socket card holder that had his name printed out boldly.

"I assume this is yours. I saw it by the exit with your ID."

Renjun takes a deep breath rolling his eyes. "Okay. What is this?" He asks with irritation. "Are you following me? Do you want something from me? Why aren't you-"

"My god, you're so annoying." Dae speaks up fiercely. It's been a while since she used this type of tone. "I've been trying to be a decent human being to you, but you're being so aggravating. Here." She shoves his card holder against his chest glaring at him. "Since when did you get thick headed?"

"Prison can really fuck you up. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get away from you by 400 yards or else the restraining order will-"

"Jeno?" Renjun questions in confusion. How could he forget that name. "You mean Jeno, Lee Jeno?"

Dae rolls her eyes getting pissed. "Fine. But can I have your number?"

"I don't think so-"

"Not for me, but for Jeno. Do you remember him?"

"But the restrain-"

"Yes," Dae nods. "You may not want anything to do with me, but I'm sure perhaps you'd be interested in Jeno-"

Dae can only blink. "He's my boyfriend."

Renjun's eyes widen in disbelief. "Boyfriend?"

Dae nods her head sensing Renjun's half will to communicate. "You would've seen him instead of me right now, he usually does the grocery shopping but he's feeling ill and resting at home."

"At home?” Renjun tries to wrap his mind around it all. It even stops Dae from speaking. "You mean, you guys are together? You're dating him? You're joking right?"

Dae blinks for a minute before pulling out her phone and instantly opening it up revealing a picture of them together in a mediation pose of yoga. Jeno's smiling brightly. "It's hard to believe but I'm not joking."

Renjun sighs. "What the hell," He whispers quietly. His eyes move across the parking space and clears his space. "You mean to tell me, you've been with him and the police hasn't locked him up?"

Dae nods her head. "For a good 3 years. In December it’ll be 4 years."

"Well congratu-fucking-lartions. Good for him. I'm not about to piss anyone off." Renjun is quick to reject again. Trying to move past her.

"Oh my god. What's it going to take for you to actually-" Dae grunts and goes to contacts on her phone. "Can I please have your number? Not for me."

Renjun, wanting to take advantage of the situation stops in his tracks with his plastics and stares at Dae. "I can't afford to go back to jail. But I need you to get off me. Do you have a car?"

"Yes..."

*

"Good. You can drop me home and I'll tell you my number and you have to promise never to bother me again." he's not in any position to make commands but with the way Dae is begging, he feels lucky to actually snap his fingers and she'll bend to his will. "Besides, we can try to catch up in the car. Is that cool?"

Dae says nothing, already picking up her plastics in motion for him to follow. She's pissed but says nothing.

After dropping Renjun home, which is a new suburb deck of house that's been added Dae waves her hand while driving off. Renjun smiles to himself, a real stress free smile. Aside from his mum, seeing Dae (someone who he’s always feared) and hearing her talk about Jeno, made him feel that anything is possible. Even the impossible seemed possible. Dae changed for Jeno. If Dae can forgive, why can’t he?

Which is why he mentally prepares himself to forgive Donghyuck for the next time he comes over. Much to his surprise, he’s shocked out of his mind when entering the apartment and inside their home Donghyuck is inside with a little girl who begins lifting up her skirt revealing her underwear.

“What the fuck- Donghyuck!”

Donghyuck’s head shots up to the door and he’s got his eyes wide open. “Renjun-”

“What are you doing with this child?!” Renjun yells out in furry.

Donghyuck scampers to Renjun and shuts the door before covering Renjun’s mouth tightly- causing Renjun to drop the plastic of groceries. His eyes move between Donghyuck’s heavy deadly stare to the clock which reads 10 am. What the hell did he just witness his brother and a child doing?

“Shut the fuck up you twap!” Donghyuck grates out through his teeth in a seething whisper. “It’s not what it fucking looks like. Stop making noise or else she’ll cry.”

But it’s too late as both of their ears are attentive to the wailing of the young little girl. “Mr Sunshine it hurts,” Areum cries out no longer being able to hold in her tears. Donghyuck sharply turns his head back allowing for Renjun to break free of his grip.

“If you don’t explain what the hell happened right now, I’m going to the police-”

“I also wanna go to the fucking police. I don’t know what the fuck to do!” Donghyuck stresses through hushed curses- but he still picks up Areum and pats her back. “Calm down kid, it’s okay. Just, just stop crying please,”

Areum obediently hiccups and hugs Donghyuck around his neck. “O-okay,”

Donghyuck breaths out stressfully before opening up his eyes and looking at Renjun, who is frozen with his mouth wide open and his eyes bulging out of their socket.

“Should I call the police?” Renjun still asks.

“Look, I…. today is my day off and I was hungry, so I went to the school to ask mum for the keys so that I could come home and get something to eat. But then, she started following me-” Donghyuck motions to Areum.

“Why?” Renjun asks.

“Renjun please, let me tell the story without getting interrupted. I’m under much pressure as it looks. I don’t know what the fuck to do. She's feeling pain. I asked where, and she kept crying. Not wanting to cause a scene I told her to go back to class but she refused. She didn’t want to go back, and then blood started coming out from in between her legs.” Donghyuck in horror recalls the situation. “I asked her to show me where she’s feeling pain. Even though she didn’t want to say it I figured it’s her fucking vagina-”

“Donghyuck how on earth are you caught up in fucked up situation like this?”

“I promised her that I wouldn’t tell anyone and it seems like I might be the only one who knows this secret. I picked her up and came straight here. It’s only 10 now, but I have to figure out what the fuck I’m gonna do before 4pm when her uncle will come and pick her up. Fuck. Her uncle is raping her with horses and she’s afraid to tell her mother or anybody because her uncle is going to punish her. I asked how will he punish her and she lifted up her skirt. Renjun, what the fuck do I do?” Donghyuck walks back and forth while explaining and patting the little girl’s back.

Renjun runs his hand through his short hair and his mouth opens up like a fish. He wants to say something, but doesn’t know what to say. Donghyuck is with a little girl who’s somehow getting raped by her uncle? “Why didn’t you tell mum?”

“She told me to stay away from her,”

“And why didn’t you stay away?” Renjun questions. “I’m sure you could’ve,”

Donghyuck pauses in his step. He looks to his hand that’s against Areum’s back. His hand is shaking as he’s patting her. He can feel her heartbeat and just from how fast it’s beating he can tell that she’s scared shitless. She’s scared and she came to him. The mere thought that someone, a little girl, found refuge in confiding in him and crying to him has him feeling responsible. This little girl had no other person to turn to. Not even a teacher…but to him.

“Donghyuck?”

Donghyuck blinks and is surprised by the emotions that overcome him. He continues soothing Areum. “It’s okay Areum, I’ll help you,” He whispers softly in her ear and gently sets her down on the coach. Her small puffy red face is scorched with tears and she’s shaking and hiccupping while holding in her tears. At this point, he completely ignores Renjun when running to the bathroom and coming out with some tissue and a face cloth and what looks like water in a little bucket. Donghyuck squeezes the cloth in the bucket of water before wiping it over the little girl’s face.

Renjun stand in place and in shock. His first instinct wants him to jump to the phone and call the police, but the way the little girl is looking at him and is seemingly trusting Donghyuck makes Renjun reconsider. It’s with a heavy yet reluctant heart that he goes into his mother’s room and finds the decoration teddy bear before moving back to the living room- whereby Donghyuck is now wiping up her legs that are stained with light patches of blood. Renjun sits on the couch waiting on Donghyuck.

Donghyuck’s ears perk up when he hears Renjun state ‘we’. “If you know how to do it, please do it. I can’t bare for her to keep hurting.”

Donghyuck takes notice of Renjun and turns to him. But Renjun lifts up the teddy bear. “Any luck finding out where she's feeling pain?"

"Can't say for sure. But I'm guessing it's her tiny lady part." Donghyuck mumbles squeezing the water from the clothe.

"Since I couldn’t finish my qualification at uni or any college because of my record, I took up online classes. I accidently signed up for art therapy and couldn’t take it back, so I had to learn." Renjun explains. "Point is, in order for child to come clean to you, you need to make them feel comfortable and then you can ask your questions. It seems she's comfortable now. Maybe if we calmly ask her, she’ll be able to tell you the details,”

Renjun nods his head and gets on his knees moving closer to Donghyuck. He tries to smile at the little girl, but she’s so timid and her big eyes pool with tears. He lifts up the teddy bear and starts with the standard child procedure of therapy. Making sure that she sees herself in the teddy bear, asking a few easy questions allows Areum to open up easily, but upon getting to the hard questions- Areum tenses up. “How is she feeling today?”

“Sad,” Areum meekly speaks out looking down and rubbing her eyes again. “Mr Sunshine it hurts,”

“Where does it hurt Areum?” Donghyuck softly asks, and Renjun can almost hear the tears behind his words. “Where does it hurt on the teddy?”

Areum looks back to the teddy bear that Renjun is holding and her face morphs in sadness. She shakes her head, but this time Renjun speaks. “You won’t be in trouble if you help teddy find out where she’s feeling pain,”

Areum taking into consideration of the words, she stares at the teddy bear in Renjun’s hands before her hands raise and she leans forward to press her finger on the lower area of the teddy bear. Donghyuck already had an idea of where it hurt, but he still gets angry when Areum points to where she’s feeling pain. Renjun asks two more questions, of how badly it hurts and also what does she feel down there. However, it’s the next question that has him bugged out.

“Teddy doesn’t like it when uncle Jung eats her out. Teddy doesn’t like it when Uncle Jung plays with the horsey on her. Teddy doesn’t like the new secret toy between Uncle Jung’s legs.”

“Alright,” Renjun nods his head, his whole mind being disgusted by what the little girl has gone through. “Does Teddy-?”

Areum pants and bounces her leg before crying again. “It hurts again.”

“I don’t know what to do,” Donghyuck mutters. “She needs a hospital more than the police right now,”

“How about we call mum?” Renjun asks to which Donghyuck freezes to. One phone call from Renjun gets an immediate response from his mother, who explains that she’s still at the school and will be leaving in 4 hours from now. “No, it’s okay mum. I just wanted to ask you…” Renjun struggles to find the right words before he says them. “A lady question.”

Unsure of where her son is heading with the question, she smugly complies thinking it’s a playful situation. “Hurry up Renji, I’ve a class in a few,”

“So, uh. There’s a girl I know…and she’s kind of having…uhm…” Renjun clears his throat before sharply inhaling and trying to compose himself. “She’s having pains around her genital area. What can I do to digress the pain she’s feeling?” The question is surely odd and gets his mother to pause while her smile depletes from her face. Renjun asks the question again before following Donghyuck who takes Areum to the bathroom.

“Well for starters would you like me to speak to the girl?”

“Mum, it’s kinda complicated, but I need to be the middle man in this situation.” Renjun shifts in discomfort. “I know it’s uncomfortable, but spare me the tough details and just tell me what I need to do to make it less painful…I think she might also have itchiness and sores. It’s tough to tell.”

“We should talk when I get home-”

“No.” Renjun rushes quick in anxiety. “I mean please, she’s crying.” Renjun looks to the little girl’s reddened face.

Hearing his words she has sympathy for the unknown girl, before moving to a secluded area to talk. “Tell her to soak herself in warm water for 10-15 minutes, and after wards she has to pat it dry with a warm cloth. Petroleum jelly usually works to ease redness or itchy ness, but so does ointment cream and even baby oil, but whatever she has shouldn’t be soap- as it can cause an irritating itch to form. As I don’t know the root of this pain, that’s all I can offer- actually, before soaking herself in the water, she needs to use some wipes to clean thoroughly around the area. Tell her to keep the area dry when she’s done it all. I’m sure in some way that’ll help to reduce the pain.”

With the phone on speaker, Renjun moves and trespasses by his mother’s room to fetch some the items such as wet wipes, petroleum jelly and a spare cloth, while Donghyuck prepares the tub and fills it up with warm water. All the while Areum stands from side to side not trying to scratch herself. Upon setting up everything Donghyuck and Renjun walk outside the bathroom door and begin to guide Areum.

“Alright kid, take this and I want you to be careful.” Donghyuck hands her a few wet wipes. “But I want you to use this like a toilet paper, wipe yourself where it’s painful but do it gently. When you’re done knock on the door alright?”

“Okay,” Areum nods his head after closing the door. Areum removes her underwear that was trenched in soft blood and begins wiping on the area. She panics when seeing all the blood. “There’s so much blood,” She whimpers but still tries to use the wipes to clean herself. After cleaning up all the blood she walks over to the door and knocks on it.

“Alright Areum, here’s what you’re going to do now.” Donghyuck speaks in a loud tone so that she can hear from the closed door. “Remove your clothes and carefully get inside the tub of water okay?”

“Okay,” Following his instructions, Areum does as told and carefully gets inside the tub. “The water is too high,” She squeaks when she nearly falls in.

Donghyuck and Renjun’s ears perk causing them to have a short discussion before Donghyuck knocks on the door lightly. “Areum? I’m gonna enter with a towel, okay. I’m not gonna look at you, so don’t worry.” Donghyuck enters the bathroom with the towel high up so that he can only look at the floor. However, he holds in his discomfort when seeing her underwear with blood patches. He grunts but still moves forward to the sink and with one hand he sinks his hand in until it pulls out the stopper allowing the water to swarm out. “Tell me when it’s okay, you should be able to sit down,”

Areum stands inside the basin as the water still circles around her stomach. It slowly sets and when Areum begins to sit down cautiously she yells for him to stop. “Stop. It’s fine now,”

“Good, the waters not too hot right?” Donghyuck asks and she hums. He stops the stopper again, before backing up. “Alright Areum, when you’re done use this towel to wipe yourself and then call us, okay?”

“Okay-”

Picking up the underwear, Donghyuck leaves the bathroom going to the kitchen where Renjun is, making a sandwich. “She has to stay in there for 15 minutes. Is she okay?”

“I hope so,” Donghyuck mumbles. “Uh,” He looks at the underwear. “I’m gonna wash this.”

“Why don’t you pop it in the machine, it can wash and dry.” Renjun says before moving over to Donghyuck and stretching his hand. “Let me do it,”

“Thanks,” Donghyuck carefully hands the undergarment so that neither of them are touching the blood. He begins to operate the machine and puts in the underwear.

“I’m also making a little sandwich for her,” Renjun washes his hands and gets a tomato out the fridge.

“She doesn’t like tomatoes, so don’t add that inside,”

Renjun, who’s about to cut in the tomato, quickly nods his head and begins adding cheese instead. “She must be those picky little children that mum talks about.” He mumbles.

Donghyuck chuckles lightly, a smile lingers on his lips and his eyes stare at his hands thinking of the day he started avoiding her because his mum said so. No matter what, she still looked for him and asked if he was okay. Even though he kept himself occupied, she was worried for him. “I wouldn’t say she’s picky. She’s actually really genuine and kind. Especially since she goes to a top kindergarten with snotty bratty children- her character feels developed. She likes helping those around her- and can I just say she’s clever. Whether it’s by sitting with someone who always sits alone, or making those around her laugh, heck she even goes out her way to help me clean after school. She’s witty for her age and has terrible puns but they always make me laugh…or even smile. I don’t know. It sounds fucking lunatic but she reminds me of myself. Not that I’m good at making people laugh or that I’m genuine, but I used to be like that. In the sense that, you give yourself to others so much that you don’t care if they hurt you or not. You just wanna make sure they’re happy.” He looks down thinking how sadly his environment and father changed him. “Lucky for her she’s in a good home. A bad home can fuck up her morals. Fuck…can you just imagine the trauma she’ll go through because of her uncle? I even found myself praying for her.”

Renjun, listening to everything Donghyuck says, doesn’t fail to notice how Donghyuck’s emotions are being responsive to what he’s saying. Normally Donghyuck was closed off or one sided and not that interested. But speaking about this little girl has him smiling and thinking deeply. Renjun isn’t blind. He knows someway, somehow, Donghyuck wasn’t the same anymore. He started changing himself and it’s evident in the way he speaks. So as he continues making the sandwich he speaks up. “Want one? You did say you were hungry,”

Donghyuck gets his head out of his hands clearing his throat. “If it’s not trouble.”

Renjun nods his head. As he’s making the sandwich for Donghyuck he speaks up. “My past family…the one in China, were kinda wealthy. Wealthy with riches, but not wealthy with love. They were an arranged couple and hated each other. I was made, with the sole purpose of being a heirloom and legacy so that our family name wouldn’t die. I can’t remember what happened all too well but, my mother didn’t really want me. I was an only child but was treated like shit every day.”

He places the plate of sandwiches on Donghyuck’s table as he continues.

“I can’t remember half the things that happened in that house but they were never happy memories anyway. Majority of my child was spent with me resenting my own existence. I turned 15 on March and my family that day decided that traveling for my birthday would bring us all together. I was a bit scared, but I trusted their words… I didn’t want to disobey them so I tried to be happy that day. We landed in Korea and they got me cake, balloons, big toys- everything was perfect and it made me really happy. So you can imagine my shock when it’s late at night and we drive to an unknown neighborhood and they told me to get out. They drove away, and I didn’t even chase them. I just stood there in silence as if I had already known that they’d do this to me... I don’t know why, but I didn’t cry. I just stood there in the dark watching people pass. Some kids stole my toys and balloons but I didn’t even cry. I think I stayed on that street for 3 days before I was approached by mum.”

Donghyuck, hearing this story for the first time is struck with revelation. He even feels guilty all over again, the same way he felt guilty when he went to jail for dragging Renjun down with him.

“Your mum, despite not having anything simply said that she saw me standing outside her house for some days and wondered if I was lost. I was still in limbo and basically didn’t answer her. But regardless of it, she took me in and from that day on I’ve been amazed at how better I’ve been treated by someone who was of lower ranks then my past parents who were high rankers. You were in prison for that period, so I grew up with your mum. She was welcoming…always made sure that I ate well and slept well. And when I had bad dreams, she’d comfort me. I never knew what it’s like to receive so much love, so I was in awe of it all. Her goodness, her kindness, her light that radiated through her sickeness…you know what’s funny, she didn’t even tell me to call her mum, it came out naturally. And because it came out naturally, I wanted to stay with her forever. She became my mum and whereas back then when I felt rejected and lonely, because of her I began feeling cared for and loved. Even when you came out of prison and saw me for the first time. I was happy to be your brother…but,”

For some reason, when Renjun looks up to Donghyuck’s eyes they both let out a little laugh upon the memory of Donghyuck being confused by the new so called addition to their family. “I was a dick.”

“You were, but I was just happy to have a brother honestly. I thought it was a normal thing for siblings. I guess I looked up to you because mum always spoke highly of you. And when I looked passed your anger issues, I saw that everything she had said about you was true. You’ve got a big heart and you care so much…you just chose to show it in different ways and because of what you’ve gone through, it’s been buried in anger and resentment. Despite being bitter at you, I realized how much you cared for me and mum. I know I said a lot of things but the fact that you really wanted to leave our lives so that we could be better made me feel bad. Because you also deserved to be part of our family…you’re already a part of it and I don’t want to lose an older brother like you.” Renjun scratches the back of his neck. “Anyway, back to what you said about a bad home fucking up morals. It’s true to some degree, and that’s why if you care enough for this child, you won’t allow her to endure by herself anymore. I realized, that it’s better to forgive you then be angry at you for your mistakes. As my brother, you’ve considered me through thick and thin…and even when I was being a moody you were somehow still kind to me. So, I just wanted to say I’m sorry Donghyuck-”

Donghyuck shakes his head. “It’s me that should be apologizing. I don’t express it much but your Chinese ass always makes me feel like I’m needed. Needed to show you the right things and not drag you down. I’ve been a bad brother, and I’m sorry bro. For dragging you down into my corrupt lifestyle. The day you went to prison for the first time broke me down so much because I failed to protect you…and that made me feel like I failed to protect mum. So, please forgive me,”

Renjun looks down at Donghyuck’s hand and brings his own hand up to shake on it. The bro handshake alone brings both of them to a place of relief. Weight is being removed from their shoulders and peace is entering in them. “I forgive you,”

“Why’d you cut your hair?” Donghyuck finds himself asking. “Even when you’re smiling you still look so mean,”

Renjun laughs and nods his head. “I learnt from you. To be dangerous you should look dangerous. And that’s what I did.”

“I fucked you up already,” Donghyuck snickers. As they sit around the table and engage in a light conversation before the alarm on Renjun’s phone rings. Once again standing by the door, they direct Areum in the next steps of patting gently with the cloth on her private area before using the towel to wipe everywhere and finally applying the petroleum jelly all over her lower half. Telling her to wait for a couple of minutes by walking up and down, Donghyuck tells her to put on her dress.

“Alright Areum, how are you feeling? Good or bad?”

“Better,” She answers before opening the door and looking up to Donghyuck.

“I’m happy you’re better.” Donghyuck squats down patting her head. “But I want you to promise me something, to not get upset when I tell somebody. Uncle Jung did this to you right?”

“He didn’t hurt me-” She blabbers but stops herself when her eyes get watery. Donghyuck feels his heart ache, but he still tries to smile to her.

“You don’t have to lie for him. When someone hurts you, you make sure they don’t break you,” Donghyuck says looking in between her nervous eyes. “You’re a beautiful and smart girl Areum, I promise you, everything will be alright and he won’t hurt you anymore. I want you to be happy and not worry about your uncle. So no more fuck. No more playing games with him. Or riding the horsey, okay?” Areum regardless of the tears pooling over her eyes she nods her head. Donghyuck places both his hands gently on her face and wipes the tears away, before he finds himself picking her up while she wraps her arms and legs on him. He hugs her so tight that it makes her cry silently.

Poor little girl. Renjun thinks to himself as he watches from the side. Donghyuck hands Areum half of the sandwich Renjun made, allowing her to eat while he carries her. She begins to fall asleep as Donghyuck pats her back in a calm way while he hums out softly. Renjun watching it all gets side tracked when his phone rings and he sees it’s his mum calling. “Yes mum-”

“What the hell Renjun?!” She shrieks. “Are you kidding me?”

“Mum?” Renjun furrows his brows being worried by the way his mum is breathing and whispering yet shouting. “What’s wrong?”

“It’s too much of a coincidence to ignore but you know what, I can’t jump to conclusions.” She panics to herself more than him before she blurts out in a hushed whisper. “Is Donghyuck at home?”

Renjun nods his head and then answers. “Yes.”

“Oh my god,” His mother panics. “This girl with pain on her genital, how is she feeling?”

“Uh…” Renjun looks to a sleepy Areum on Donghyuck’s shoulder.

“Renjun be honest with me right now. Is there a little girl in our house, by the name of Areum?” His mother strains out, alarming Renjun. “Does this girl with the pain on her private area happen to be Areum? Answer me Renjun.” She sternly pressures.

“Mum before you freak out, listen-”

“Oh my god. What the hell Renjun? Tell Donghyuck to bring her back immediately! She’s been missing for the student parent meeting and her guardian is about to press charges on the school. Tell Donghyuck to bring her back now!”

“Donghyuck-” Renjun quickly gets up and hurries to Donghyuck. “You need to take her back to the school-”

Renjun doesn’t even need to finish to know that something went wrong. “Shit, it’s only 12.”

“I’ll order an uber-” Renjun is quick in grabbing his phone while searching through his wallet. Donghyuck is already opening the door and going out- with Renjun behind him. Thankfully the uber Renjun calls is already downstairs by the time they both scramble out the building. Renjun spots the black vehicle and directs Donghyuck. Once paying for the ride already by the door, he wishes Donghyuck luck. Once the car is out of sight, Renjun can only hope that Donghyuck won’t get punished. They just forgave each other for crying out loud- they can’t take him away… They won’t take him away if Donghyuck plays his cards correctly and explains the situation.

While it’s a 30 minute drive from Donghyuck’s mother’s home to the school, from Yezi’s hospital to the school is an hour’s drive. And as soon as she gets the message from Jaehyun that Areum’s not at school her heart busts with fear.

-

10 minutes before.

Quietly opening the door, Dae is surprised by the pairs of shoes all around the door. Jeno was supposed to be in bed or rather trying to rest up- however upon seeing the shoes Dae is confused of why people would be over when he was sick.

"Honey bits I'm home!" She calls out removing her shoes by the door. She heads first into the kitchen to leave the groceries. "Sugar plump?"

"Hey babe," Jeno enters the kitchen, his infamous eye smile greeting her while he walks closer embracing her in a hug, which she smiles and sinks into. Being in his arms always felt blissful. "Uh…” He runs his hands over his hair once they break apart before holding onto her hands with his own shaky hands. “I…" He whispers. "Some people are here. Please just hear them out, please? I'm right here okay? I promise I won't let go of your hand. Nothing's gonna happen to you because you're going to be holding my hand,"

"Sure," Dae nods her head squeezing his hand unsurely.

"Let's go," He says and pulls her hand gently.

"Is it my dad? Who’s here and why do you look so worried?" Following behind Jeno to the living room, Dae is greeted with two standing offers who bow their heads.

"Oh, hi," Dae is highly shocked when seeing both the officers; Jisung and Jaemin.

"Miss Dae, how're you doing?" Jisung greets.

"I-I'm good Officer," Dae smiles humbly bowing as he returns the bowing. "How have you been?"

"Good." He answers simply, just as Jaemin bows his head.

“Miss Dae,”

“Hi Officer Na,” Dae nervously greets. “Uh, I hope all is well Officer,"

He smiles simply and nods his head. “All is well,”

“Uh, so what brings you here?" She politely tries to bring up. “Were you waiting long? Would you like me to make some tea?”

“It’s alright,” Jaemin states. “We were actually waiting for you,”

“Oh, I hope I'm not in trouble. I pay my taxes,” She jokes lightly making the guys politely laugh. “Then I hate to be rude but…is everything alright?”

“Why don’t we sit down?” Jeno says and she looks up to him with anxious eyes. Sitting down beside him, she’s aware of another person in the room… particularly on a wheelchair. A shiver runs up her spine causing her entire body to stiffen.

Although she's calm on the outside, Jeno can tell she's panicked because she holds his hand tighter. “Dae, uh… Remember that day when I told you that my brother was in the hospital? Because he got stabbed,”

"I take it his injury is pretty bad. But, why did you bring him here?" Her voice unintentionally quivers. “Officer-”

"Dae," Jeno calls but she’s hyperventilating causing him to hold onto both her hands. “Dae listen to me-”

“Jeno- I can’t…”

"Babe he’s helpless-"

"I’m helpless right now- How could you bring him here to our home-"

Mark’s dark hostile eyes peer up at Jeno when both his hands leave her own and go over her head. He brings Dae’s head close to his while her hands hold onto his wrists and she shakes her head. Mark can’t take his off his brother. Surely this was his brother, but with the way he is with this girl makes him look so different.

“I promise everything nothing’s gonna happen. He’s on a wheelchair and he can’t hurt you,” Jeno whispers to Dae. “Just breath and calm down please,”

Dae being reluctant feels her eyes watering but she holds herself back and nods her head. Dae takes a few minutes to regain her composure as she tries to breath in and out. Looking up, the first person her eyes go to is Mark, but she can only shiver when his eyes are already on hers.

“Dramatic-”

"Mark." Jisung warns Mark from talking any further before focusing back on the couple. "Miss Dae, I’m not sure how much Mr Lee Jeno here has told you, but this is concerning Lee Mark. Mark was released from prison a months weeks ago and has been adhering to living honestly. However, he unfortunately got himself caught up in a brawl and his opponent drew a knife and stabbed him in the back literally. As his Probation Officer, seeing his state, the court saw it fit for him to be taken care of by his family. As he's got no other family but Jeno, we ask your cooperation in-”

Dae can only shake her head. "Even if Jeno’s the only family left, they can't force him to stay with him. There are many other places to take him in, not here,"

"I already signed the paper's in his name," This time Officer Na says.

"Why?" Dae stresses but Jeno holds her hand.

“Because I agreed,” He states. He tries looking at her to see her reaction, but her eyes are closed as her body lightly trembles. Her silence scares him. Jeno speaks up noticing Dae going into retreat and trying to let go of his hand. "For how long is he here?" But Jeno holds tighter onto her hand.

"A period of 6 months," Jaemin answers.

"6-" Dae is blown out of her mind with shock. She abruptly gets up forcing her hand out of Jeno's hand. "I'm not- I can't- just give a moment."

She storms out of the living room yet halts when hearing a low voice. Not turning her head back, she holds onto her face feeling her tears threatening to spill. "Hey, Dae right?" Mark's eyes peek up to Jeno who nods his head. "Look, it was not my intention to get involved that night and get stabbed and being forced to live with my brother. I don't want to be here. If you don’t want me here I’ll go. Your anger towards me is rational and I deserve it. But if this is the last time I’ll see you I just want to apologize for what I did to you. Seeing how happy you makes my brother gives me the assurance that he doesn’t need me. So I’m sorry for everything. I’m not blaming the drugs, but I was aware of what I did to you. Shit got out of hand, and I violated you. I’m sorry-”

She leaves the living room not staying around to hear him. She didn’t want to hear him- but somehow him amplifying his voice apologizing has her in tears. The vague memory of having him take advantage of her body has her shivering.

Feeling warm hands around her body she stiffens for a little bit before sinking into the familiar scent of Jeno. “If you’re not comfortable with him here, I’ll tell them to go. Should I tell them to go?”

Dae silently stays in his grasp not letting him go. He’s the brother to a guy who violated her against her will. The fact that Jeno, her lover will let his brother go because of her makes her feel some type of way. Especially since he apologized to her.

They’re chat is interrupted when Jaemin budges past looking alarmed. “Yezi calm down- I’ll be there right now. I’m coming to get you- Shit.” Jaemin stares at the phone and instantly gets his eyes on Jeno. “Can you open the door for me, I need to go.”

“Was that Yezi on the phone?” Dae asks in confusion get her arms off Jeno. “What’s wrong? Did something happen?”

“It seems like she’s walking to the school from her workplace. I need to go and pick her up and at least get her to the school,” Jaemin explains while Jeno opens up the door and gates for him.

As soon as Jaemin is out of sight and Jeno begins closing the gate and door Dae speaks up. “Do you want him to stay here?”

His eyes perk up by her words and he sighs while moving close to her. Looking down to her, he has a view of how nervous she looks. It's almost as if she's scared. He knows that she is - after all, she doesn't look up to him the way she mostly does with assurance that he'll keep her safe. And he doesn't want her to lose faith in him, that he can keep her safe. But at the same time, Mark is his brother. And hearing about his condition made him wonder how exactly his brother got hurt. The brother he knew killed anybody who even tried to hurt him. But seeing him in his living room looking defeated has him feeling worried. At first, he didn't want for his brother to stay…but seeing him in a wheelchair knocked his heart down. "I know he's my brother, but he hurt you-"

"Baby, look," Dae places her hand underneath his cheek. "He's your family, and I shouldn't be dramatic about it. You came to see my family and they gave you a chance, I think it's only fair to give him a chance. It's up to you,"

Jeno can only look away from her for a moment. But then he realizes she isn't really trying to get his attention. She's trying to talk to him because she wants to comfort him, and Jeno knows he owes her an answer. Looking back into her eyes, his heart skips a beat feeling nervous. "I promise that I won't let him hurt you again,"

Dae nods her head. Although she doesn't say it out loud, she has a feeling that Mark won't hurt her again. If he was able to save her that night she took a walk and was nearly killed, and if he was also able to apologize and admit that he would leave, just gave her the reassurance that he wouldn't do anything to her.

“You can continue Officer,” Jeno returns back to his seat holding Dae’s hand. Mark looks at their hands clasped before looking to the ground.

“I told the Officer I’m good on my own.” Mark says. “So sorry for wasting your time. We’ll also be going.”

“He can stay,” Dae meekly speaks. Getting his attention, Mark freezes as he places his hands on the rollers of his wheel chair. He looks up to Jeno first before at Dae. She timidly looks down and breaths in deeply. “You can stay,”

“I’m good. I’ll go.”

6 months is a lot, but Jeno clears his throat. “Come on Mark, please stay. I can’t let you go out there on your own. Let me take care of you,”

“You’ll bitch about it-”

“I won’t bitch about it, please bro.” Jeno pleads.

In response, Mark places his hands back on his lap and shrugs his shoulders silently waiting for the officer to continue. As Jisung begins to further into the types of medication Mark needs and the types of exercises he should do, Donghyuck in the car with Areum (who is now awake) tells jokes to cheer up.

“What did the ocean say to the sand?” Donghyuck starts making Areum smile expectantly. “Nothing, it just kept waving,”

Hearing Areum laugh sets his mood a bit lighter, hoping that when he gets to the school he can be calm and deal with any problem in a tone that’s not angered. So when the driver stops by the kindergarten and Donghyuck heads out the car with Areum - he is greeted by his mother who has a stone poker face. “In the Principal’s office. Now.” She takes a hold of Areum’s hand and they begin to walk inside the building.

Areum is nervous upon getting to the office and seeing Uncle Jung. “Thank goodness you’re safe,” Jaehyun breathes out. He gets up from his seat moving towards Areum but she stiffly moves back and away from Donghyuck’s mother’s hand and attempts to run out.

However she bumps onto a pair of legs. Gazing up and Donghyuck’s face, she hides behind him holding onto his legs tightly.

Not only is the principal surprised, but also Donghyuck’s mother. Jaehyun immediately understands the situation when seeing Donghyuck’s face. He scoffs out pinching his nose before turning to Areum. “Areum come here,” She hesitantly shakes her head, holding tighter onto Donghyuck’s legs. Donghyuck has his hand over her head. “Mummy said I should pick you up since you weren’t feeling so well today. Come,”

“I think it would be best if her mummy came to pick her up herself,” Donghyuck speaks up, not once looking away from Jaehyun’s frame.

Jaehyun peers at Donghyuck with violent eyes. “I am her guardian-”

“You sexually violated her.”

His mother abruptly calls on his name. “Donghyuck-”

“I don’t care who you are.” Donghyuck continues nonetheless.

“Sexually violated?" Jaehyun scoffs. “What are you insinuating?”

“She’s not leaving until her mother comes.”

“She’s on her way as we speak. So I think it’s best we don’t cause any trouble. I’m willing to look past the fact that Areum disappeared and hasn’t attended her classes.” Jaehyun states. “As long as Areum’s safe, we don’t have to involve her mother.”

“She’s not safe with you.” Donghyuck retorts.

An awkward laugh from the principal only gets the attention of Donghyuck’s mother, as both the other males are having a deadly stare down. “Mr Jung, please do understand this is our new recruit janitor. He’s not quit familiar with-”

“So you’re okay with this janitor kidnaping my child-”

“She’s not your child and I didn’t kidnap her. She came to me.”

The principal clears his throat. “Mr Lee, we’ve had no disagreements or troubles with you up till now. Please leave the child alone.”

“Donghyuck let her go.” His mother speaks up.

“You’re acting as if I’ve got her hostage.” Donghyuck mumbles and folds his arms. “She’s clearly clinging onto me because she doesn’t want to go to her so called guardian.”

“Areum dear. Please go to your guardian-”

Jaehyun cuts the principal off and aims his speech to Areum. “Areum you’ve been a bad girl today. If you don’t want to be punished, you’ll come to me right now.”

Areum standing behind Donghyuck has fear gripping onto her entire being. She trembles when turning her head away from him. Seeing this, Jaehyun stands up right and peers into Donghyuck’s eyes. Donghyuck is trying desperately hard to control himself, especially feeling how urgently she clings onto him. “I told you she’s not going anywhere until her mother comes.”

“Areum. Do you think he’s going to protect you from when you get home?” Jaehyun asks.

“You are not going to touch her.” Donghyuck instructs.

“You have no say in this janitor. And for the record I’ll punish her more because of you.” Jaehyun seethes through his teeth. “Areum come here now!”

Areum jumps in fear and instantly squanders over to Jaehyun keeping her teary eyes tethered to the ground. Donghyuck can only watch in anger when seeing Areum meekly approach her ‘uncle’.

“It seems like you were a bad girl today,” Jaehyun speaks to Areum when he squats down and pats her head trying to get her to look up to him. When looking into her teary eyes he looks up to Donghyuck. “You made her cry.” Jaehyun stands up. “Thank you Principal, we’ll be going,”

“No problem Mr Jung.” The principal bows his head maintaining a professional smile.

As soon as Jaehyun gets to the door Donghyuck refuses to move. “You’re not going anywhere until her mother comes.”

Jaehyun’s tongue pokes the sides of his mouth. “And I told you that I’m willing to let this whole mess slide. Move.”

“No.”

“Fine. If you don’t want to move, I’ll make you move,” With that Jaehyun omits a fierce backhand against Donghyuck’s face. Donghyuck’s face strikes to the left in pain. He blinks the dizziness away panting out. He was hoping not to get into a fight but after hearing Jaehyun’s next words, he’s not so sure that he can hold himself back. “I’m gonna have fun punishing her today.”

Balling his fist Donghyuck lunges to Jaehyun punching him. Jaehyun springs backwards as Donghyuck furiously tackles him to the ground rapidly landing a rough rock hard solid punch over his cheek. Blood bursts out of Jaehyun’s mouth as Donghyuck lands another aggressive punch on the other side of his face. Being dizzy by the impact Jaehyun lays motionless panting out while Donghyuck grabs his collar looking at him in the eyes. “You’re not going to touch her again!”

Donghyuck hurls out his fist tightly when hearing Jaehyun laugh. “What did she tell you? Was it the horsey that got you-” Donghyuck punches him again trying to shut him up.

Jaehyun grates his teeth tightly when seeing Officer Na drag Donghyuck by force in a headlock hastily getting him off. “What the hell is going on here?” The Officer enquires.

“Jaehyun!” Yezi pounces in worry and heads to Jaehyun’s side. Seeing his bruised face, she clips her hair up before helping him out . “Oh my god what happened?”

“That fucking janitor took Areum to god knows where and did god knows what to her,” Jaehyun grunts when Yezi helps him onto a chair. She heatedly turns her head back after hearing Jaehyun’s wanting to give the ‘janitor’ a piece of her mind. Her eyes enlarge just as her whole body turns to face the janitor fully. With her mouth slightly parting, she watches how Jaemin tries to tame him. But Donghyuck tries to get out of the headlock bustling with anger.

“Officer Na I did nothing wrong this time! He’s the one you should be cuffing!”

Never ever would she be able to forget his boiling voice, the same man who broke into their home, the same man who had his way with both her and her sister, the same man who raped her, the same man who inflicted such fear upon her, that same man who wouldn’t stop beating up everyone and who at least punched or slapped everyone at least once. She’d never ever forget that man with anger issues who unveiled her and made her feel nothing but insecure.

She attempts another slap but Jaemin is quick to holding onto her hand. “You’ve got it all wrong-” Donghyuck’s eyes burst open when hearing her words, he tries to move his hands to explain but when seeing their in cuffs he points to Jaehyun. “I’m a janitor here in the school and-”

Seeing him manhandled by Jaemin while a familiar motherly figure tries to speak has her seething with anger. Seeing Areum being trapped behind Donghyuck’s mother, Jaemin and Donghyuck has her consumed with rage. She stomps to them and upon getting a clear view of him her hand swings back and she slaps him. Donghyuck being smacked rapidly turns his eyes towards the culprit. In an instant his eyes are frozen on Yezi with confusion. “How dare you touch my daughter!?” Another slap from her has Jaemin letting of a frozen Donghyuck while he attends to Yezi.

She grabs onto Areum’s hand and pulls her away from them and next to her. "You took my daughter to your house?" She slaps his again.

Jaemin tried to hold Yezi to stop her from hitting Donghyuck. Surely Jaemin already understood the situation, and is conflicted on who the real culprit is. But hearing Donghyuck blame the 'uncle', he knows it's a truth that Yezi isn't about to listen to.

Donghyuck is equally stunned when seeing Yezi. He never forgot her face and seeing Areum rush to her hugging onto her legs has him confused. Was Areum… her daughter? "Is she your daughter?"

“Did you touch my daughter?” Yezi breathes out, her body absorbed in rage. “How dare you-”

“Janitor?” Yezi shakes her head in confusion and looks to the principal. “This man is a janitor here in this school? Do you even know who he is?” The principal tries to speak but Yezi cuts him off. “He is a convict who went to jail for rape!”

“Listen to me.” Donghyuck stresses. “Your daughter-”

“Don’t you dare talk about my daughter!” Yezi sends another sharp slap across his cheek turning it red and causing Jaemin to hold onto her-

“Get your hands off me-” Jaemin let’s her go keeping his head down from her sharp stare. “Did you know he works here?”

“I’m not his parole officer-”

“Why is he out of jail!? He went to jail for raping me and now he’s free-”

Donghyuck steps in trying to speak in a calm tone. “That was a fucking long time ago but you need to listen to me or else Areum will-”

“Don’t you even dare say her name-” She tries to go in for another slap but this time Donghyuck grips her hand tight.

“That fucking uncle is raping your own daughter!”

“Shut up.” Her hand swings back and she gives him a tight back hand slap her eyes watering. “Shut the hell up. I can’t even stand to look at you right now. You’re a rapist, you don’t think that’s something the school should’ve known about?”

Donghyuck is bent over breathing out. Looking up into Yezi’s eyes he touches his own cheek that has a cut and is bleeding before noticing Areum crying and standing behind him. He stands up again and inhales sharply. “I’m tired of this back and forth. Don’t you care about your daughter-”

“Stop mentioning my daughter! Not only did you take her out of school and to god knows where- but the fact that she’s been feeling pain labia only proves to me that you did something to my daughter?”

“It’s not about what I did! For fucks sake did you even question that uncle-”

“Baby don’t listen to him-” Jaehyun tries to steal Yezi'd attention.

Donghyuck bursts out again in fury. “I only kept her from that freaking uncle who keeps playing 'fuck' with her! Did you know that he raped her and he’s been-”

She’s quick in slapping him and grabbing his shirt having so much adrenaline. “Let me ask you a question- did you or did you not go to jail for rape?”

“Did what I say fly through your head-”

“Did you go to jail?

“Fuck- this isn't about me right now-”

Donghyuck stares at her being absolutely shocked at her being one minded. “Yes but-”

“Did you go to jail for rape?”

"For fucks sake can't you hear me-"

"Did you-" Yezi's eyes refuse to leave his wide eyes. "Go to jail for rape?"

“That’s all I need to know.”

“You don’t know anything.” Donghyuck’s hands in cuffs grabs onto both her hands and gives her one violent shake. “If you think I have anything with your fucking daughters labia you’re wrong- you should be looking at that uncle who keeps raping her. I took her out of school because of him and what he did to her-” Yezi who struggles to get her hands out tries to hit him but he speaks up. “And if you keep hitting me you’ll make Areum cry.”

Hearing Areum’s name, Yezi stops hyperventilating hearing Areum crying. Looking back and forth between Donghyuck’s eyes Yezi sharply inhales when noticing his features. Although Areum looked a little bit like Dae- Areum surely had his eyes. Seeing his eyes angry and feeling his force on her causes her to tear up. Turning back and away from him she doesn’t see Areum by Jaehyun or even Jaemin but instead she’s behind Donghyuck holding onto his leg. Pushing herself off him she looks down to Areum who keeps on crying.

“Areum sweety come here,” Yezi hates seeing her daughter in tears and behind the man who allegedly raped her.

Looking up to her mother Areum walks over to her mum and Yezi picks her up holding onto her tightly as Areum breaks down and cries louder. She cools her down and beads her eyes to the principal. “For hiring this rapist I’m going to press charges and sue this school-”

“Ma’am please-” This time Donghyuck's mother tries to intervene. If what Donghyuck was saying is true, then it meant Areum was in serious pain.

“Your son is a rapist and if you can still stand there and be proud of him or even defend him then you’ve got bad luck on your shoulders.”

Donghyuck pokes his cheek before glaring back at Yezi just as his mother shakes her head. “Don’t you dare talk to my mother like that when you can’t even look after your child, and see that she was raped-”

“My daughter doesn’t concern you!" Yezi fights the urge to slap him when having Areum on her shoulder. "She never will. Jaemin I’m going with Jaehyun. Please.” She faces Jaemin who has a stern face. “He shouldn’t be free at all. Jaehyun.”

“Mummy he didn’t do anything-” Her eyes blur when hearing Areum whisper in her ear.

“God you’re a filthy human being.” Yezi’s looks to Donghyuck who has his head down. “I hope you rot in that jail cell.”

Just as they leave, Jaehyun walks past Donghyuck giving him a dirty look. “I guess I should’ve known, that once a rapist always a rapist. You probably had your own taste of her-”

Donghyuck bucks again but instantly Jaemin holds onto him. “Donghyuck calm down.”

The principal speaks up. “Mr Lee you’re fired.” He states and looks to his mother. “I need a word with you Mrs Lee. Officer you may leave.”

-

20h00

Yezi looks up when hearing a knock on her door. Chenle walks in the room quietly noticing Areum sleeping in her mother’s arms. He takes a seat next to Yezi on the bed looking down at her. “Heard from Jaemin what happened.”

Yezi’s mouth goes stiff just as her eyes sadly look down.

“He said that the convict mentioned Areum bleeding from in between her legs. They did an examination on Areum and...” Chenle starts lowly. “The results came back with Jaehyun's clots of DNA. How did that convict know before you?”

He sighs out before kissing Yezi on her forehead. “It’s not your fault,” He whispers out to her.

Yezi pouts her lips being saddened. Upon getting home from the hospital, Yezi put Areum on the spot and when Areum began speaking Yezi felt her heart aching as his broke. From Areum speaking of the types of games that she’d play with Jaehyun to her hearing about how ‘Mr Sunshine’ took her to his place and helped cleaned her up only made Yezi overwhelmed with feeling like a failure. “My boyfriend put his dick into my daughter and I didn’t even know. She told that convict because she was afraid to tell me.” Her voice fades into shame as she sinks her head down trying to hush herself. Chenle gets on the bed and positions himself next to her so that he can hold onto her as she’s crying.

“Then whose fault is it?” She whispers.

“Yezi. Things just happen to remind us of the world we're in and it's types of people.”

“I thought I was doing everything right,” Yezi sniffs. “Why is it so hard protecting her?”

Yezi lays her head on her dad’s shoulder listening to him and reflecting. He rubs her shoulder. “The fact that Jaehyun, a well respected figure could do that to child shows you that you can't trust everyone. You did your part in raising Areum, but unfortunately she's now a part of this sick world.”

Chenle hums soothingly rubbing his hand on her arm. In a slow and quiet voice, he whispers in Yezi’s ear. “That’s what I asked myself the first time you and Dae were born.” Chenle recalls with a little smile. “The answer I got, is just to do everything the best way I can. Areum has just been hurt psychologically, physically and even mentally,”

Areum shifts in her mum’s arms causing both their eyes to land on her.

“What happened to Areum needs to open your eyes to allow you to step up in your responsibility as her parent. Right now, Areum needs you to not be a nurse for others, but to be a nursing mother for her, you’ve got your mum and I behind you every step of the way.” Chenle advices. “Another thing, you shouldn’t sue the school or the janitor, you should give blame to the rightful person and take legal actions against him. No man who hurts my daughters has the right live comfortably.”

Yezi sighs and repositions Areum in her arms so that she can hold her tighter. “It’s the fact that the person who raped me, knew before me, that my daughter was being hurt. And he stepped up in that responsibility as a stranger who helped a little girl. Areum called him Mr Sunshine. He raped me but to her he’s Mr Sunshine. Dad,”

“I can’t say much about him, only that perhaps the prison life this time around woke him up,”

-

After allowing Mark to stay with them, Dae thought that Jeno would take care of his brother and wouldn’t involve her. But then it became personal for her when Mark was being mean to Jeno (by refusing to do anything). It’s not till she stepped in and assisted Jeno that Mark reluctantly gave in. First it was already a hand full to accept Mark and help him out as a sick patient, but for some reason, she also had to create extra space on her dinner table for Donghyuck.

It was odd to be seated with all the criminals that broke into her home. It felt therapeutic in a way. But Dae was uncomfortable.

When he arrived, he immediately wanted to leave after seeing Dae. But Jeno told him to stay and surprisingly Dae too was kind (looking like she was held gunpoint) enough to allow him to have a seat on her supper table. Jaemin explained the situation over the phone and Mark asked Jeno if Donghyuck could come over. Just for one night. When telling Dae... Hearing what went down at the school both Dae and Jeno were in shock, but didn’t turn Donghyuck away.

She expected everything to be discreet and abnormal, yet when Jeno and his brother tried to lighten up the mood of the table she tried to cooperate. Donghyuck found it particularly unusual to sit and eat on the same table with Dae, however being seated with Mark and Jeno allowed him to be respectful as he saw they were being polite throughout everything.

“You cook well,” Mark says modestly trying not to appear unbearable. “You’re out of Jeno's league,”

Dae simply nods her head meekly eating her food.

“Mark,” Jeno runs his hand through his hair. “Can you just eat,”

“Hmm, I'm just complementing her food. I should’ve known why you changed for her. It wasn't her pussy, it was her food." Dae stiffens up and stares at Jeno. Mark however tries to calm the atmosphere looking at Dae. "I didn't mean it in a sexual way, more that my brother has always been the pegging type,” Mark breaths out, causing Donghyuck to snicker.

“What’s pegging?” Dae asks curiously looking to Jeno who rolls his eyes.

“It means he likes getting his ass eaten out-”

“Baby don't even listen to him. I don't like getting my ass eaten out. It means that I prefer you taking control over me,” Jeno immediately cuts, feeling his cheeks getting warm making Dae uncomfortably smile. Was this a normal type of conversation for people like them?

They continue to eat in silence with Mark and Jeno talking, while Donghyuck and Dae kept silent. It wasn't awkward but it surely was uncomfortable for Dae.

“So pegging... that's interesting.” Dae shifts uncomfortably in her seat, letting out a forced laugh. "Is this a normal conversation we should be having when eating?"

Mark laughs at that. "Oh babygirl you've got a lot to learn about your 'boyfriend'. How'd you guys meet? I mean after he got released?"

Jeno sees Mark's attempt to soften the barrier or even break the ice. He also sees Dae's reluctant will to comply in being bearable. "Well your brother saved my life. I got in a car accident and he helped me."

Mark nods his head. There's just something about being sober and looking at her that has him feeling some type of way. Guilty? Just looking at her... She had a soul, and the fact that she even considered her brother makes him wonder... Why? How?... Why? "I really am sorry."

"Mark." Jeno warns, but Dae sitting next to Mark actually smiles lightly.

"Jeno, just eat. It's fine." She says softly. She feels red in the face but doesn't peek at Mark.

“Wow, the food is really good. I haven’t eaten a meal like this in forever.” Mark modestly speaks after slurping the last bits of his food.

Dae simply smiles being happy about being complimented about her cooking. She can’t imagine the type of background they all come from. “I’m glad you’re enjoying the food. Do you want another bowl?”

“Yeah I’m starving,” Mark chuckles lowly.

“I’ll get it for him,” Jeno pats her back and picks up Mark’s dish. “At this rate you’ll eat all the food. Have some self control man.”

“It’s okay.” Dae finds herself speaking while taking the plate away from Jeno and dishing up for Mark. “He can eat as much as he wants,” He looks malnourished. Is what Dae says in her mind.

Everyone deserved a good home, food, clothing and warmth and love. When she took away the fact that Mark was a criminal and allowed him to be free, she began to see a different person in him. And although it was bothersome at some point, knowing that he lacked a lot of means to life made her be considerable towards him. Dae tried not to judge him for his mistakes. The same way she forgave Jeno, she took it upon herself to forgive Mark and move past all that he did.

“They have large appetites,” Dae whispers to Jeno when looking at Mark eating his food, before she turns to Donghyuck who’s also quietly eating and dishing up for himself. They were starving. She turns back to Jeno. “Just let them eat,”

“So,” Mark turns to Donghyuck. “Are you going to speak to your mum?”

Donghyuck shakes his head. "No."

“Don’t you think you have to?” Mark asks again. “You didn’t do anything wrong. She has to know that. Besides didn’t you say Officer Na said that woman dropped the charges?”

“That bitch threatened to sue me when I didn’t even touch her kid.” Donghyuck grumbles still in disbelief. Peeking over at Dae, Donghyuck ignores that she’s looking at him before he turns his gaze back to his food. Quietly eating, he finishes up his meal and looks to Mark. “I should go-”

“Nah stay man. They’re chilled,” Mark peeks at Jeno and Dae who clear up the table and go to the other room to wash the dishes together.

Donghyuck doesn’t put up a fight, since he was stuffed and he didn’t want to go back in the park all alone. He was back to square one. No job with an angry mum. “Fuck. What am I going to do now?” Donghyuck lays his hand over his head feeling a headache form.

“What’s this?”

Donghyuck looks up when hearing Mark question. One the table, Dae places before each of them a plate of what looks like chocolate balls, but really it’s some sweeteners. “Dessert.”

“De- what?” Mark looks to Jeno, who places a spoon on their chocolate pudding. “Dude don’t tell me this is how you live every day?”

“I got used to it, apparently all the sugar sucks out any congested fat. Something like that.” Jeno smiles. “It’s really good,”

“Where I come from, one meal a day was all we needed to live.” Mark shakes his head. His brother was surely living the life.

“Can I ask you something?” Donghyuck looks to Dae who’s holding onto her spoon still eating. The mood around the table is calm. He doesn’t want to ruin it, but he needed to know something.

Her heart seizes but she nods her head remaining calm.

“Your sister…” Donghyuck looks down at the table thinking of how he should ask the question. “Her kid…was it… because of me?”

His question leaves a difficult silence on the table as Mark’s ears are sharp to the question. Jeno too turns to Dae. Although he lived with her, he never knew how to address Yezi and her child. They only met once but he was so sure that Donghyuck’s sperm couldn’t have made such a polite little girl. So just like everyone anticipating her answer, Dae places her spoon down and nods her head. “Yes.”

Donghyuck’s eyes widen in astonishment. “You mean, that little girl, Areum is… Mine?”

“In this type of situation, I don’t think she’d call you the father, but yes, she’s your seed.” Dae states.

“Can I ask you another question?" Donghyuck tries not to get upset about that. "Do you have an uncle called Uncle Jung?”

Dae shakes her head. “That was my sister’s boyfriend.”

Donghyuck’s jaw’s tighten. “That fucker.” Donghyuck shakes his head. "If your sister doesn't mind, I'd like to attend the court. Officer Na said they'd put that uncle on trial." The feeling of despair wash over him as he relives the memory of Areum crying in his arms. How Areum cried in pain because of what that man did to her. Donghyuck is left feeling the same way he felt after raping Yezi. Anguish and misery coat over him, only this time his feelings are concerning the little girl…his little girl. Areum. “I shouldn’t be asking any favors from you. But,” Donghyuck clears his throat. “Tell your sister that the same way she got me locked up, should be the same for that uncle.”

And so it is, the day of the court has everyone boiling with anger towards the defendant who was defending Mr Jung Jaehyun, aka Uncle Jung, or best known Jung Jamal, wealthiest son to billionaire owners of Jamal Car Funders.

“Judge, what Lawyer Lee Taeyong has brought forth to you is not admissible evidence for 6 year old Zhong Areum, who was convicted of non consensual rape by my client Jung Jaehyun. By law this right here, my client being accused of this heinous crime, is a criminal offense.” Yuta states. “I understand the issue is sensitive however, it could all be foul play to remove Mr Jung from his enterprise.”

“The investigations and tests results-” Taeyong objects.

“Could’ve been forged. From facts mentioned in the re-examination, it’s common for little girls her age to go through bleedings. One of the many pointers I brought forward is that fact that she-"

"Your honor you can't deny the facts. The investigation team found that inside the little girl. Several gentile seeds of a grown man were found in her-"

"Your honor even if all the facts are against my client, they have no other witness other than the family and their 'claims'." Yuta states.

"But she's my daughter!" Yezi bursts out in tears. "He-"

"The 'he said-she said' game doesn't work here in court. If there are no witnesses then this case should be closed shut." Yuta ends buttoning up his jacket. He knew Jaehyun was in the wrong, but they were paying a lot of money because Nakamoto Yuta was the best lawyer when it came to backing up criminals.

“I testify.”

Yezi immediately snaps her head back to the voice, just as everyone else is stunned by the sudden witness. Seeing Donghyuck stand up, looking pissed has Yezi's heart pounding in hope. She turns forward seeing Yuta looking unmoved. “Your honor, if I may say, the man testifying is the former janitor of the kindergarten in which the child attends. Prior to this case being opened, the mother of the child stated that her child had no underwear when returning home. In this matter, we can blame the janitor as he was the one who took the child home with him. God knows why he’s not here on the stand. My verdict is that my client Mr Jung Jaehyun is innocent. The real culprit should be investigated. That's an unreliable witness.”

“Your honor, I testify.” This time Renjun stands up. “I was at home when he brought the child home. The underwear went missing because I washed it. She was severely bleeding and thus it soaked her underwear.”

“Your honor, if I may, Huang Renjun is a convict of-”

The judge Jungmyeon seeing almost everyone in the court room standing up turns to the Lawyer Yuta. "It looks like you have yourself a case. Security, take Mr Jung into custody. There will be no bond. Adjourned."

“Then I testify.” Dae stands up looking serious. “I was at their home and looked after the child while they washed her underwear.” Although it’s a lie, it throws Yuta off guard as he blinks at Dae as well as the next person who stands up. This causes a string of people standing up stating how they were witnesses to the devious and heinous crime committed against the child. The innocent child who was defenseless.

The moment the judge hits the gavel, Yezi unknowingly lets out a sigh of relief as tears leave her eyes. Laying her head against her dad's shoulder, some tears pouring out of her eyes causing her to hiccup, sniff and fall into a breaking emotional state. Her dad, Chenle hugs her tightly. He feels such an overwhelming amount of joy that they initially won the case. While Yezi hugs onto her dad, Chungdae walks back into the court room carrying Areum who had bright eyes.

Yezi immediately cradles her baby in her hands kissing her cheek. It's sweet victory with everyone in the courtroom besides the Jung family- being joyful that the man who hurt the little girl was going behind bars. While Dae and Jeno find themselves communicating with Renjun, catching up - Donghyuck has his eyes on Areum who's being held tightly by her mum.

"At least she's okay," He sighs and clears his throat walking out the courtroom. Donghyuck can't help but feel better at the case win for the little girl. For some reason, even though he was fired and never to be around the little girl and her family (not that he wanted to anyway) but he felt good- that all the ties were finally cut from that whole trouble.

What started out as a thirst to get more riches and possessions turned into a nasty tunnel hole that caused him his ultimate life dismay.

"You!"

"Never again." Donghyuck declares. However, as he's about to step on the last step away from the court building, his ears freeze.

Not being the name he was given, he turns around knowing very well of the voice of the person addressing him. Yezi.

Her heart is beating when seeing the face of the man who once raped her. Clutching her jaw and stiffly going down the stairs while he turns his body towards her. He's got his hands in his leather jacket...the same leather jacket he last wore when he raped her. She holds herself from balling her fists and swinging it across his face- especially since he looks nonbelligerent.

Standing 2 steps away from him, she sucks in a deep breath and gulps all her piled hatred down. "Thank you,"

Donghyuck's ears twitch in hearing the foreign word. No one ever thanked him. Not knowing how to react, he nods once and turns around.

"Wait." Yezi quickly withdraws her hand and holds onto it as Donghyuck's head turns back. "IWith every being in me, I hate you. I really do." Her eyes feel watery when thinking of the night he forced himself on her. "But, I love Areum. She means the world to me, a-and..."

Yezi has to look down and away from his empty stare to try and calm herself down. Donghyuck no longer looks at her and also looks to the ground. However he turns his body towards her paying attention to her. "I'm sorry."

She didn't want to hear his apology. She didn't need it. Her eyes shut tightly and she folds her lips shaking her head. Composing herself, she faces Donghyuck again, her eyes lightly glistening. "I love Areum so much. So so much, you have no idea. I'd do anything for her. I don't know how, but ever since I had her I could only love her, not because of what you did, but because she came from something so painful, and I had a choice to kill her of give her life... I could've killed her along with the painful memory of what you did to me, but to me that wasn't fair. I kept Areum because really I wanted to hurt her so badly...but as I kept her and the months kept passing and she kept growing in my womb, something in me changed. I couldn't protect myself from what you did to me, but I could protect her. And it's all I could think about when she was born. I only wanted to protect her from what I wasn't protected from...the cruelty of the world. I... I chose to give her life...but I failed to protect her from the one thing that broke me..."

Yezi tries not to appear vulnerable and look into his eyes, but she can't help looking into his eye and being equally stunned by the look of accountability and blame. Donghyuck feels bad hearing that, to think that little Areum was defenseless just like her mother...brought Donghyuck back to the night he raped her...he thought of his own mum and how defenseless she was...that wasn't fair and none of them deserved it.

"But you protected her." Yezi nods her head looking down holding in the tears. "You protected my baby and looked after her. You protected her from the cruelty. She spoke so highly of a janitor called Mr Sunshine, and at the time I really hoped that this Sunshine guy would not hurt her. To think it was you, really had me in the mud. You really, did more for her and I... I really hate you, but I wanna thank you so much. Thank you, for everything you did for my child. You didn't even know her, but you still saved her, and for that I owe you so much." Yezi bows her head before standing up straight again.

Hearing how she takes complete ownership of Areum without acknowledging Donghyuck, settles his heart. "I felt bad for her," Donghyuck lowly speaks.

Yezi hearing his voice, hears her own heart skip a beat.

"I witnessed my father abusing his power over my mum one too many times. I was powerless and would always get beat up when I tried to intervene, and so I thought that's just how the worlds works. You fight to get what you want. My dad really was a spineless coward and I'm no different seeing as I did what he did, I did the same thing to you. I realized that I had become my dad and I...hurt you. I hated that my mum looked at me like my dad and that everybody around me looked at me the same way. But your daughter...that little girl looked at me with light in her eyes."

Donghyuck can't look in her eye, but finds refuge in looking at the ground when thinking of Areum.

"That little girl never missed a day in asking me how I was, or what I was thinking, and she'd always tell these bad jokes. It's weird to say but, she reminded me of myself. Innocent, young and so full of wonder. The light in her eyes...was honestly what kept me going. If a child can look at me like that then hopefully someone else might too. When she told me of the secret that her uncle had been doing to her, my heart was enraged. Here was this little girl with so much happiness in her being used. I snapped but I couldn't do anything because I wanted a second chance at life and didn't wanna get involved in drama. I hate that I never spoke up the first time she told me, but I hated it even more to see her lose the light in her eyes. I wasn't about to let another light die- not especially since I was the only one who knew. I wanted her to be...free and not turn up like me, or my mum...or you. She wasn't meant for that. Not with the light she has in her eyes."

Donghyuck finally looks up at Yezi, he's a little surprised that there's a small smile on her face, but he continues on.

"So really, I felt bad that she lost her light." Donghyuck ends up saying. "How old are you now?"

"21."

Donghyuck slowly nods his head. "You're a great mum." His lips find himself saying. "You love your child so much and would do anything to ensure her safety. Despite the fucked up world, you did what you could to keep her safe. I know I'm not one to talk but, I should be thanking you... For not killing her. She brought light back into my life and if it weren't for you, then she would've bitter like me. But you did such a good job with her." Donghyuck finds himself awkwardly saying and feeling the heat rush to his cheeks.

There's a pause of silence between them with Yezi shyly looking down with a smile acknowledging his words.

"I'll be going." Donghyuck speaks up and scratches his head. "Take care of her, yeah?"

Yezi nods her head.

"Take care of yourself too," Donghyuck says. "You're one tough broad, so don't go looking for trouble,"

She can only smile lightly, even though it's genuine. She doesn't stop him when he begins walking away, but instead she watches him disappear after turning a corner.

She jumps lightly when turning around seeing Jaemin walking down the steps. "Everything good?"

Yezi nods her head looking up into the warm eyes of Jaemin. "Everything is good,"

[Taglist: @rizykim | @sexygrass | @jenjaemjam | @lvmarfc | @haechanistfriends | @markleefuckme ]

[powerpolyculeshowdown]

[Greater Hawkins Polycule] Most of the differences aren't necessarily about the relationships in question so much as the exact Nature of the relationships, if that makes sense? My maps got different colors for Romantic & Sexual & Combined & Queerplatonic, as well as like.... Committed metamours, if that makes sense?

Obviously everyone's a metamour somewhere but there's a difference between "you are my metamour because we're dating the same person" & "we are in a Relationship and the nature of that relationship is as metamours" is the best way I can describe it.

& then I do have Steve/Nancy/Jonathan as something past-but-amicable but that's just a personal preference. Like, I'd have liked them to give each other a better shot & they were cute together but I don't actually like it as endgame without a fic really selling it to me, at this point in time?

Aside from that the other major difference is that some non-protagonist teen characters have snuck into the margins as well either as background flavoring or past relationships/feelings or out of a personal fondness for the background character in question. (So like, Heather, Eden, Tommy/Carol, etc)

oh yeah that makes sense actually i havent thought too luch about the details im kinda working them out while i write, cause im doing small stories for the different relationships and i might post them under a Greater Hawkins Polycule series hdjsgjshsj im not sure yet cause im Shy

i did post a Fruity Four fic that kinda stopped gaining traction which made me lose motivation/inspiration so i want to finish the stories before i post them this time

i dont like what they did to jonathan in season 4 and sometimes i dont include him in the polycue directly, i like to think he and eddie would be friends, in which case if jonathan isnt in the polycule hes just adjacent to it dating argyle and both of them are good friends w eddie. but nancy is a girlboss i think she deserves 2 boyfriends and 2 girlfriends. also in my au jonathan didnt lie to her about uni so im not mad at him hsjsgsjs

[castlebyersafterdark]

I'm never gonna be in a situation where the person I'm sleeping with has that as a factor, if that's what you’re getting at. I did actually try to date a few girls when I was a teenager but, yikes. Never got very far hahaha. But it's not like women (and those who otherwise experience this) are so super mysterious. It's not secret knowledge. Moral of the story: I just know for a fact that many men are purposefully obtuse or immature. Sexism. All that. Simplifying the issue but for the purpose of this ask! 💁‍♂️

ok wow i'm gonna need some vintage vinny elaboration! this is sooo interesting

firstly - getting as personal as you wish or dont wish, can you elaborate on your teen experiences dating girls to give some context to mike?? any similarities aside from the superhero thing haha? or not, if we're speaking metaphorically. i mean, when s4 opened with mike boasting to dustin about how el 'literally saved the world twice', i was like... dude. that's literally guys just showing off their trophy girlfriend cos she's got big tits yet he doesnt know anything about who she is.

and secondly, men being purposefully obtuse and putting women on pedestals because of sexism? oh, if you have time pleaseeee elaborate on that too! sounds like you were amongst that perhaps before guys knew you were gay so they tried to get you to laugh along and you were just like... hahaha... ermmmm...

Oh gosh, not the vintage Vinny lore 🤣 High school me is so... I mean. We have to give our teenage selves some grace. We were all so young and stupid and naive and confused and it's not our fault! That's just life. And if you are still a teenager - stay strong, power through.

If you want context to explain Mike, my path wasn't quite similar, but I understand where he's coming from. Since this is the space I'm spending my time, just some anecdotes for comparison sake later. I think something to consider with Mike is that I really don't think he recognized his sexuality for what it is until we see him in season 4. This is the beginning stage of, hmm not acceptance because he's not accepting it, but recognition? Eddie. Not being able to tell El he loves her. His weird reaction to seeing Will again. Not being able to reach out to Will. Isolating himself through his off screen depression in between the seasons. He's going through it. Gay thoughts are one thing, behaviors we read as super gay as watchers of the show but for the character it's not apparent yet - the subconscious. Internalizing it. His journey is latent. But he's in it now. I think a part of him did want to have a girlfriend, he's supposed to want a girlfriend, and El - what a perfect girl to have by his side! He doesn't recognize Will for what he could be to him, even if his behavior can be read as a crush, esp in season 2. But he's young. He doesn't really know yet. Conformity and internalization are a hell of a beast. He's getting there. Tooth and nail.

Personal takes under the cut like always!!

Me? I wish I could explain how sexuality develops and how people know young while others don't. I cannot give that insight. When kids talked about crushes and stuff about girls, I knew I had to keep my damn mouth shut because I thought about boys. And I knew it was weird. I told myself, fine. Keep that secret. But you gotta think about girls, too. So I forced it. I never pursued a girl, but if some brave girl made it clear she liked me - yeah, I'd try it. Go on little dates. Kiss, make-out, but I just never really wanted more and I fucking knew why!! And kissing and making out were just really fun to do. But - I liked the company of girls. Girls are awesome!! But that was all.

It's brings it back to why I relate the most to Robin, which I've mentioned. I made a close friend in my junior year. She was so cool. If I was straight - I'd have wanted her to be my high school sweetheart. We were outsiders in our extended friend group because we hung out with the skater kids and stoners - but neither of us could skate! We were both such shit at it. So we stuck together. And she confessed a crush on me at one point. I couldn't break this girl's heart or pretend. So I came out to her. The only one who knew besides my sister. And she was sad but told me it made a lot of sense, which rocked me to hear, but we remained friends. Took her to prom actually. Senior year I ended up in a complicated fwb situation and I was in no way taking him to prom and I still feel like an asshole about it.

So. There's some lore!!! Being a teenager is so hard. Sexuality is a behemoth of confusion and the journey is winding. Give grace to your teenage self. What did any of us know? How do you navigate all that?

As for the "men being purposefully obtuse" comment - I remember now what I meant for it. It was less about the average man putting women on a pedestal and more about men being so purposefully backwards that the misogyny and sexism override any sense or logic. I meant like, how you read about some conservative senator making an inane comment about women's bodies, for example "if she didn't want to get pregnant she should have just controlled her body and not gotten pregnant" or that some guy said "why can't she just hold it and wait until later" about a woman having a period like a grown man saying that?! All the comments you see screenshot from idiot twitter threads. Come onnnn, men! I know how these things biologically work and I'm a cis gay man, why can't you straight men learn some basic facts about the people you want to date or just simply have sex with? I feel like a lot know, but they on purpose, refuse to portray themselves as anything but these ignorant brutes, hating women while desiring them. Do they really not know or is not knowing part of the image. "Can't let them know we understand women or else we can't keep on being dicks and saying it's impossible to understand women." Irritating!! Sorry for the rant hahaha

[lilareviewsbooks]

The Last Binding Trilogy: On Ignoring Enslavement, Gay Bridgerton & Pacing Issues

3.5/5 stars 377 - 422 pages contains: Edwardian England setting; hidden magic!!; queer romance :)

I'll be honest: what I wanted was gay Bridgerton.

Now, listen. Everyone and their mother is watching the new Bridgerton season, and I had never even watched the first one. So my girlfriend sat me down the other day, and we started it. But before that, the idea was already in my head: "Where's my gay Bridgerton?", I wondered, every hour of every day. "Where are the dramatic tensions and weird social conventions of a time long past? Where are the BALLS?"

And so I went on a search. Tumblr was extremely unhelpful, but after much, much digging, I found.... This. The Last Binding Trilogy by Freya Marske.

Of course, this takes place in Edwardian England, not during the regency period - and although I am a Brazilian through and through, my history nerd heart cannot be made to call both of those time periods "the same thing". I will say though, the vibes are pretty similar.

The Last Binding follows three interconnected couples - one per book - as they discover a sinister plot related to a secret society of English magicians. As I read that summary, I thought - perfect! Lots of romance, which is what I want.

Mmmmm.

There is a lot of romance, don't get me wrong. Enough that the "I-don't-read-romance" side of me was tempted to put it down sometimes, even if my craving was for that specifically. But there's a plot that connects all the books together, that just keeps going. There's no way to ignore it, or to push it aside - and it's also the reason why the books need to be read in order.

And, let's just say that the plot isn't, like, riveting. I came for the romance, personally, and it's pretty good romance. I will absolutely give the books that and that's why I rated them highly. However, I found the main plot to be unconvincing. It's not that it wasn't fun, - particularly in the second book! - but I didn't find myself impressed at all. It's all constructed kind of as a mystery, but none of the twists and turns are masterful, no hints are dropped, and the ending of the third book is odd and unsatisfying.

Plus, I do think there's a pacing issue. There's so much plot in the third book, - the longest - a lot in the second, and dare I say not too much in the first? And, yes: the first one is the best one. In particular, the climax of the third book, which I just finished, was harrowing to read. It took chapters and chapters for the action to conclude, and it just kept going. Part of this, I think was the author's insistence on tying every single loose end in a pretty little bow with precious few pages left. This was complicated by the fact that she had a gaggle of mustache-twirling villians in her hands, all of which - and no spoilers - meet terribly unsatisfying ends.

The large cast of characters quickly got out of hand, as well - although I do think they are all very charming. By the third book, there are so many people, and they are all always together, that the action slows as an effect of it. At every point, we must pause and visit each character - what was this person doing? And that one?

It's a whole thing.

The books are commendable, though, in the romance department and for their attempts to communicate thoughts on consent, - sexual and otherwise - belonging to a place, and social injustice. In fact, each book tackles a different social prejudice: the first, homophobia, the second sexism, and the third, classism. And, of course, we're talking about a white author, here, and I don't mean to suggest that she should have written about what she has no lived experience to speak with authenticity about, but the absence of race was a gaping problem in the story.

There were two side characters that were Indian, and that was it. There were side comments about the difficulties they face in white English society, but they were few and far between, usually brushed off with a joke from one of the Indian characters. And, of course, the injustices of the Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade loom over this book like a shadow, as we go over the lives of these rich white English nobles. It is mentioned once, off-handedly.

If the author's project was to not broach the subject, then why set it in Edwardian England in the first place? Why include other forms of prejudice so explicitly in the narrative? This is fantasy we're talking about! Every detail of the story is under the author's control. And so I found it a really, really big slip-up.

And: some of the story mentions New York City, and references explicitly English magicians who have moved to the "colonies". For a story about belonging in a place, - as the author says herself in the acknowledgments of the first book - where are the discussions of colonialism? Many times, we hear about people's magic being tied to the land they swear oathes too. So what of people who had their land stolen? Another implication not considered, another reason why there was no point at all to the trilogy being set in Edwardian England.

In general, I found the romance to be enjoyable, while the plot dragged and failed to capture my interest. The attempts at social commentary are commendable, but often fell flat as there was an absence of saying anything new or truly transgressive. Especially when it came to race. I don't not recommend it: I think there's good to be found here. But it definitely has its errors.

[tess-eh]

Blog Post #1 Af-Amer 112A

African American Studies 112A

Professor Due 

01/18/2024

Blog Post #1

In all of the works, Get Out, The Comet, and Wake had a powerful and unfortunately accurate representation of blacks in regards to their black history, which as we learned in class can be considered as ‘black horror’. At the roots of black horror is racism, and these films and stories showcase that message. In Wake, we see messages of black magic/black voodoo when Ruth kills her father and his corpse's soil to create a husband. I have always associated voodoo with African Americans, specifically in the South in cities like New Orleans. Voodoo is part of the black culture in New Orleans, Louisiana, and the fact that we see a black woman using voodoo/black magic enhances her character’s black history. 

The Comet shows a more depressing side of black horror, a truly scary side that is painful to revisit, but is necessary as we still see discrimination in our country every day. In The Comet, there is a black man, Jim, and a white woman, Julia, who for a moment believes that they are the last people alive after surviving a Comet strike in NYC. In this moment, Julia sets her racial prejudices aside and treats Jim as if he is a man. She even thinks to herself that it is odd he is acting like a man when he doesn’t look like one because of his skin, in terms of acting like a civil gentleman. To me, this was the most powerful line in the short story by DuBois, because it shows how horrified white people are of black people for no reason at all. In fact, if Jim wasn’t the last man alive, to Julia’s knowledge, she would not have even talked to him in reality and made this realization. It is tragic, which black horror as a genre shows, that people have a preconceived notion to discriminate and stereotype black people. At the end of the story when all seems to be back to ‘normal’, Julia’s father first asks if Jim raped Julia. He of course didn’t, and Julia ends up defending this agreeing that Jim did not rape her, but it is so disturbing that the first thought when he sees her daughter after a Comet strike is to assume that a black man, who protected her, had raped her, after giving off zero signals that he might have aside from him being a black person. 

In Get Out, right from the beginning, we see that there are some underlying roots of racism within the family of Rose, who is Chris’s girlfriend. We also see a theme that is not so common outside of The Comet and Get Out, where the white woman is dating, or communicating, with a black man. Black men have this horribly misunderstood stereotype that they are more dangerous or sexually assault more women, so they should be handled with more caution. This film beats that stereotype and actually shows how white people are the enemy in this race fight. Rose’s father defends himself when Chris points out that all of their workers are black, which has already set the tone of the film. I really liked in this film how Chris handles himself because although he has the right to overreact, he doesn’t give them that option or that pleasure. I was on the edge of my seat watching this film, which is also an accomplishment for Jordan Peele, to keep the audience not only engaged, but thrilled at the images on the screen. His goal was to relate to everybody in the audience, and while I am not African American, I am a woman of color, and in that sense I felt like through our country’s history, and my knowledge of that, I could also relate to the film in a different way than the black audiences would. 

Before this class, I knew nothing of black horror, and I did not know that black horror was directly related to black history. I also hated horror films, and after the second week of this course, I am starting to get more comfortable with horror films and fascinated by the history of black horror in these specific films. This course is different, in a good way, from what I was expecting– I did not expect this many films to watch, but I love watching movies in my free time so this has been very enjoyable homework thus far and I look forward to the future films we are assigned to watch.

[randomshyperson]

Love is Outside the Screen - Part III - Elizabeth Olsen x Reader

Summary:  The one where Reader plays Vision in the MCU and she falls in love with her co-worker Elizabeth Olsen.

Warnings: (+18), smut, sexual themes, strap on use, teasing, fingering, sexual suggestions, explicit language, explicit, obscenity, a bit of praise kink, dom/sub dynamics, bottom reader mostly, switch dynamics, power dynamic changes, slight possessive sex, brief angst, alcohol mentions, arguing, jealously, fluffy.

Words: 7.935 K

A/N> Instead of writing my series, I'm continuing works that were finished already. This is basically porn honestly haha No, but jokes aside, we have fluffy moments with a lot of smut. Good reading everyone!

Part One | Part Two | All Works Masterlist || AO3

//-//-/////-///-//

Love is Outside the Screen - Part III

Northern Ireland, two years ago.

You slipped under the long wooden table as the script indicated.

Your character was supposed to give a slight nod, and then gasp because of the torso injury, and you followed the script perfectly.

When the director yells cut, you stand up, trying not to bump into the makeover they did on your clothes.

"That was great, guys!" Shouted Alex Graves in the direction of the cast scattered around the medieval set. "Let's call it a day."

You were exhausted.

The Game of Thrones footage was absolutely grueling, and time-consuming, although it allowed you to learn something new with almost every scene.

Walking back toward the dressing room to clean up your makeup, you smiled shyly at the girls in the salon who congratulated you on the day's performance while helping you to remove your costume.

While they were going through your hair, you decided to check your cell phone.

There were two missed calls from Lizzie, and you felt your heart swell with guilt immediately.

She had also sent you messages asking if everything was okay, or if you were busy, and saying that she missed you, and you wish you had answered them all, but your routine had been completely absurd.

You felt your chest ache with longing every time you thought of your girlfriend.

When you signed the contract, you knew the conditions, and so did Lizzie. But nothing prepared you for the real thing.

Almost three months without a decent conversation, not even video calls, and the lack of her in your life was making you frustrated and irritated all the time. You were sinking into the screenplay and the recordings, because you simply hated not having Lizzie in your day-to-day life.

"Thank you girls." You said as soon as you noticed the makeup completely removed from your abdomen.

The change in the script killed your character sooner than expected, and you should go home early, even though it was going to take two or three months, it was much less than originally planned.

Grumbling softly, you went back to the dressing room, deciding to call Lizzie now that you would have a little time alone.

She doesn't answer until the second-to-last ring.

"Yes?" Her husky voice signals that she was asleep, but all you can feel is your body shaking at the sound.

"It's me, baby." You reply tenderly as you sit back in the armchair, pressing the cell phone to your ear as if you wish you could reach into the device and touch your girl.

"Oh, hey." She comments sleepily, and you wonder if she has closed her eyes again, or even opened them. "It's late."

"I know, I'm sorry." You say leaning back in the armchair. "I wanted to check that everything was okay because I couldn't answer you earlier."

"Don't worry, darling." She says softly, almost sleepily. "I just missed you."

"Me too, my love." You assure her, feeling your chest tighten slightly. My god, you just want to see her, hold her, touch her. "Lizzie, darling, are you asleep?"

"Yes." She whispers, making you smile.

"I love you baby." You say. "Call me when you wake up, I will interrupt as many scenes as it takes to talk to you."

"Behave yourself in the studio, love." She mumbles sleepily, and you laugh lightly. It was the same warning she gave on your last day in California, on the way out of the airport. "I love you. And I miss you."

You cursed the entire movie company at once when you could perceive the upset in Lizzie's tone, even in her sleepy state. You repeated that you loved her one more time before hanging up the phone.

As you put your cell phone away to grab your keys and head back to the hotel, you wondered if a breach of contract was really so bad.

//-//

Present, California.

You felt Lizzie's arms wrap around you as soon as you made mention of getting out of bed. You smiled, turning your body to look at her.

Her sleeping figure with her eyes closed, her hair slightly tousled made your heart warm with affection.

You loved her so much.

Raising your hand to her face, you stroked her cheek gently with your thumb, and watched the woman sigh softly, and even in her sleepy state, lean into your touch.

"Lizzie." You called softly, trying to wake her up. And did so again until she mumbled softly, leaning her face against the pillow. You let your hand wander to her hair, enjoying the softness as you stroked her scalp with your fingers. "We need to wake up baby."

Lizzie just mumbled again against the pillow cotton, making you smile at the cuteness of that scene.

You moved closer only to deposit short kisses across her face, and only stopped when she let out a husky giggle.

"Good morning, love." You whispered against her ear, and were about to pull away, but she tightened her arms around your waist, keeping you almost on top of her, making you smile.

"Good morning." She sighed back against the skin of your neck, and you blushed slightly when you felt her inhale your perfume and then tighten her fingers around your waist. "Fuck, I love you."

You laughed softly at her sudden, hoarse confession, but let your arms slip around her shoulders, burying your body against Lizzie's. The tenderness was wonderful, and she moved one hand up to caress your back while the other remained on your hip, her thumb moving across the skin beneath your blouse.

You tilt your face away just to look at her, and already you find her with her eyes wide open, a shy smile on her lips.

"I love you too, babe, but we need to get up." You tell her, and you almost get the impression that she's not even listening, because all she does is look at your face with adoration.

You bite back a smile as you feel her legs move beneath you, her bare foot caressing your ankle before she spins you around quickly and stands over you, the sudden movement making you sigh and tighten your arms intertwined around her neck.

"Lizzie!" You exclaim humorously, but all you get is a low murmur as she sinks her body against yours and buries her face in your neck.

"How much time do we have?" She asks against your skin, her lips dangling on that sensitive part of your collarbone and sending a shiver up the length of your spine.

"Enough." You reply already affected by her touch, closing your eyes to enjoy the sensation.

Lizzie smiles against your neck, beginning to deposit chaste kisses against your skin, making you sigh softly.

It didn't matter how many times you had been together or for how long, your body reacted to her in the same way. You only hoped that you wouldn't be late for your appointment with the Marvel directors, but when Lizzie slipped her hand up into your pajamas, you didn't care about that anymore.

//-//-//

London, 1 year and 9 months ago.

It's your third time on "The Graham Norton Show."

You finished taping Game of Thrones the day before, and this was your last appointment before returning to California. To Lizzie.

Part of the cast is sitting next to you, and you are glad for that because you are distracted this evening and can use the time they answer questions to think about your girlfriend. And you miss her for sure.

Graham, the host, asked questions about the final season, and about day to day life on set, and after Kit Harington and Emilia Clarke commented on everything being amazing, and not telling anything about the plot since they weren't allowed to, you were slightly surprised that the subject shift went directly to the romance rumors between the cast.

"I hear that some of you have been becoming close friends outside the set." Graham begins with a chuckle, and you and the cast share a chorus of dissatisfaction that makes the audience laugh. "Which is normal in a long series of course. But we wanted to bring that in because we love gossip."

"Since I'm married, can I have a drink in the dressing room?" Kit jokes, drawing laughter from everyone.

"You're supposed to help us with the arguments". Graham replies humorously. He leans back in his chair slightly to point to the monitor behind him. "We have some behind-the-scenes photos here. And Miss Clarke looks very comfortable."

The audience laughed at the comment, and you tried to cover it up with an awkward laugh. It was a picture of Emilia Clarke, your colleague who plays Daenerys Targaryen, on your lap. But the moment was badly misinterpreted. The photo was taken right after one of the prom rehearsal scenes, and Emilia had gotten one of the coordinations wrong, and you laughed when she fell on you.

Of course, this kind of insinuation was happening because to the media, you two were two single women. And you were used to this kind of questioning, but still, it was always uncomfortable.

"We were dancing, Graham." Emilia argues humorously. "It's not what it looks like."

The audience lets out a chorus of disappointment, and you and Emilia giggle awkwardly.

"Was that the mating dance, ladies?" Graham teases and you want to dig a hole in the ground, but all you do is keep up with everyone's laughter. "Despite all the jokes, I think Marvel's couple is going to be threatened."

The comment makes your heart race, but the audience is very approving, applauding heartily.

At least with this you can talk about Elizabeth.

"Is tonight the night you are going to take over America's dream relationship or can we just keep saying that you and Emilia are together, since there is not the slightest chance that someone that attractive is single." Graham tells you with humor making the audience and cast laugh. You try to keep up, not wanting to seem rude. You wish you could tell him that there is nothing wrong with being single, but you don't think you want to create an awkwardness so you just settle back in your seat as you joke:

"Unfortunately I will deny it again, Graham" You reply. "And I'm not dating Emilia either, I assure you."

You spend the rest of the evening dodging the comments, and are exhausted by the time the interview is over.

"Hey, are you going back to the hotel already?" Kit asks you just as you walk back to the dressing rooms, and you deny it with your head.

"No chance, I'm leaving." You reply. "I'm going straight to the airport, I have a flight in two hours. What about you, Harington? Aren't you going home to see your wife?"

"I didn't know we were talking about wives." He jokes making you blush and look away. Kit didn't know about Lizzie, but he knew you had someone. "Of course I want to come home, but I still have some appointments here. And Rose is in Spain."

"That sucks, man." You comment and he murmurs in agreement, shrugging.

"Yeah, but longing sure makes the sex better." He retorts with amusement and you grimace before laughing.

"You're unbelievable." You joke before waving yourself off in farewell, turning in the direction of your dressing room.

As soon as you enter, you take your cell phone out of your pocket and try to call Lizzie, but it goes to voicemail. You leave a message saying that you can't wait to see her and get your things ready to leave.

After saying goodbye to the cast again, and taking a taxi to the airport, you receive a message, but it is not from Lizzie.

*Sara evil agent* sent you an attachment.

You frown at the matter. "Off-screen romance? Would GOT star Emilia Clarke be dating queer Marvel protégé?"

You call Sara the same minute.

"I literally said I wasn't dating her!" You complain as soon as she answers and hear Sara laugh on the other end.

"Oh, honey, I told you, the media loves a little gossip." She says. "And you need to stop setting up fake girlfriends so quickly, I can barely keep up."

You grumble in irritation and your agent lets out a giggle.

"Don't be so grumpy, it's just a rumor and the last time I checked you were a single woman so I don't see a problem." She says and you bite the inside of your cheek. Since your lack of excitement about GOT, Sara suspects something. Neither of you says anything, but you know she's not an idiot and figures you have a girlfriend. "Are you going back to LA already?"

"Yes, I'm catching my flight in an hour."

"I hope you're ready to record, Lady Vision." She jokes. "Your scene schedule is getting closer."

"I plan to rest this week." You warn, slightly distracted. "Game of Thrones really was something different."

"I just hope people like the ending."

You giggle and Sara wants to know why, but you don't give her any spoilers. After asking if everything was okay, and assuring her that you had eaten something before the interview, you hang up.

Lizzie didn't text you back and you fell asleep on the plane.

//-//-//-//-//

California, three years and eleven months ago.

Your heart was beating so fast that you could hear it in your ears.

But Lizzie's hand in yours was doing a good job of calming you down.

Maybe it was just because you had waited, or maybe it was because you were so much in love, but you don't remember feeling so nervous about the idea of having sex with someone. Not since your first time.

And well, now with Lizzie, it was actually only the first time you two were going to sleep together. You didn't have to be nervous, but you were.

Liz opened the bedroom door as soon as you two reached the room, and dragged you inside with her. You closed the wood as you entered.

The tension was palpable in the air, and you wondered if you stayed still long enough, she might hear your heartbeat.

You looked at her, your eyes locked on each other, and a shy smile on your lips as you approached, stopping inches from her body.

Lizzie holds her breath.

"Are you nervous?" You ask in a husky voice, raising your free hand to go around the length of her arm with your finger, admiring the way her skin shivers at your touch.

She just shakes her head and you smile, resting your hand on her cheek.

"It's just me." You comment as you lean your forehead against hers, and you both close your eyes in anticipation. "We can stop if you're not sure..."

"I'm sure." She interrupts half breathlessly, her hand tightening its grip before letting go of yours, so that she brings both hands to the sides of your neck. "Are you sure?"

"Yes." You assure before breaking the distance, bringing your mouths together in a firm kiss that draws a sigh from both of you as your hands move up to Lizzie's waist.

It doesn't take long for the kiss to deepen, your tongues fighting together and the sensation making your head spin and your body heat up.

Lizzie gasped against your mouth before parting for breath, and you used the opportunity to let your fingers run down to the hem of her shirt as you pulled it up. In motion the piece was off, and she copied the same to remove your blouse.

You bit your lip as you looked at the sight of Lizzie's exposed torso in front of you, her nipples hardening in the air making you feel the tightness beneath your stomach increase.

You lunged forward, grabbing her left breast with your mouth, and Lizzie let out a loud noise in her throat, throwing her head back as your tongue skirted her left nipple.

She was so hot and smelled so good, and the sounds she was making were driving you insane.

You moved your hands up to her breasts as soon as you brought your mouths together again, your tongue circling hers as you played with her hardened nipples, and it wasn't long before Lizzie began to whimper, closing her legs and thrusting her hips towards yours for more friction.

You smiled against her lips, you would give her exactly what she needed.

//-//

California, one year and nine months ago.

Leaving your keys on the counter, you were surprised by the silence as you entered.

It wasn't that you wanted Lizzie to stay late to wait for you, except that it was exactly what you wanted.

You left your bag on the living room floor and called her name twice before assuming she was asleep.

Sighing slightly, you went up the stairs to your room, but it was empty. All the other rooms were empty, which made you frown.

Okay, you didn't expect Elizabeth not to be home just the day you were returning, after months of not seeing each other.

But you didn't have much time to think about what might have happened, because a clearly drunk Lizzie stumbled into the house, fighting against the lock and her own balance just as you were coming down the stairs.

"You're drunk?" You ask in a voice in a mixed tone of disbelief and concern upon seeing her, and Lizzie is startled for a moment before giggling.

"Look who's here, California!" She announced to the room with irony and with open arms, stumbling inside. "Hollywood's most eligible bachelorette, watch out ladies and gentlemen."

You frowned at the little scene, Lizzie walked with difficulty to the kitchen as you finished going down the steps, she murmured quietly and you with your arms crossed, trying to understand exactly what was going on.

"What happened to you?" you ask as you follow her across the room, Lizzie takes off her shoes with difficulty, almost falling to the floor at least twice. When you make mention of helping her, she holds up her hand for you not to, and you are starting to get worried.

"I went to have fun." She replies with a humorless laugh. "I can have fun."

"Of course you can." You retorted with a raised eyebrow, watching Lizzie take a deep breath and close her eyes as she leaned her back on the countertop, probably getting a headache from the way she buried her face in both hands for a moment. "Who did you go with?"

"I don't know, Mom." She sneered wryly, and you clenched your jaw. Lizzie laughed at your expression, and pouted. "Oh, did I upset you? Sorry, darling, I'll try to be a good girl for you."

You shook your head slightly.

"Babe, what is happ..."

"Don't call me that." She cuts off quickly and you look at her in surprise. Lizzie closes her eyes and takes a deep breath and when she looks at you again, she has thick tears in her eyes and you feel your heart soar. "I saw the pictures on television, Y/N. I saw the pictures, I saw your interview, I saw the videos on instagram. And I guess I understand, because she's beautiful and we haven't seen each other in months but I thought you loved me..."

"wow, what are you talking about?" You interrupt, confused and frightened, and Lizzie looks like a complete mess. She is crying and you reach up to touch her face, and try to calm her down. "Babe, breathe, I don't understand."

She whimpers softly, and you wonder how much booze she really has consumed.

"You are going out with that woman and I love you and everything is horrible." She declares in a whiny voice and you look at her with a frown.

"Lizzie, what..."

But she pushes you and walks off toward the bedroom, and you try to keep her from falling over drinking at least three times until she can get up the stairs properly.

"Lizzie, wait, talk to me." You beg but she keeps walking and you enter the bedroom a moment after her, watching her walk to the closet and start throwing all her clothes out while mumbling about cheating.

You take a deep breath with your hands on your waist, letting out a humorless laugh. It was an absurd scene to say the least.

"Elizabeth Olsen, stop this immediately!" You command as soon as she steps out of the closet, and she widens her eyes slightly as she shifts the weight of her feet before veering to the floor. You sigh as you walk toward her. "Babe, look at me."

"No."

"Lizzie."

Reluctantly, she does so. You soften your expression, feeling your heart soar at the image of her face, longing invading your whole heart.

"God, I missed you." You confess half breathlessly and Lizzie looks on the verge of tears. "Darling, where did all this come from? I'm not seeing any other girl."

"I saw the pictures..."

"Lizzie." You interrupt seriously, shaking your head slightly as your hands land on her shoulders. "I have no one but you. I would never cheat on you, I don't know where that came from. I wish you hadn't drunk so much so we could have a serious talk."

Lizzie gives a mischievous little smile, her gaze half lost because of the alcohol.

"I'm not drunk." She mumbles clearly intoxicated, making you chuckle slightly.

"Of course not." You said as you pushed the loose strands of her hair behind her ears. "You made a mess in the bedroom, babe. Why don't you try to sleep while I clean up?"

Lizzie sighed, clearly tired but shaking her head in denial

"I don't want to sleep." She said as she brought her body closer to you, her hands squeezing your shirt. "I want you to fuck me."

You bit back a smile, looking at Lizzie with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, yeah?"

She murmured in agreement, her fingers trying to open the buttons of your shirt, but she was clearly in no condition to do so.

"I'd like that too, but you're drunk." You say as you move your hands to hold hers, smiling at the grumble of frustration she lets out. "Go lie down, I'll get some water."

"But..."

"Bed, Lizzie." You ordered again as you intertwined your hands to lead her to lie down.

She was reluctant a few times but eventually agreed and lay her down on the mattress, placing the comforter on top.

When you made mention of getting up, she held your hand.

"Don't go." She asked softly with her eyes almost closed. You smiled.

"Aren't you thirsty?"

Lizzie denied and pulled your hand, you moved closer to lie beside her and she wasted no time in entwining her body in yours.

You let your fingers run through her hair and she sighed lightly, not taking long to fall asleep. You waited a few more minutes before moving, getting out of bed as gently as possible so as not to wake her.

After collecting the clothes Lizzie had thrown across the room and putting them away in the closet, as well as putting the party clothes she was wearing in the wash, you went back downstairs, looking for your bag to take to your room.

Your cell phone vibrated as you walked up the stairs.

It was a message from Scarlet, and you laughed lightly as you read its content.

“I heard you're coming home today, right? Lizzie was really upset about the rumors that you were dating, and asked me to take her out for a drink. I dropped her off at home, but she was pretty shaky. I didn't know you two had a thing, can we talk about it over coffee tomorrow?”

You were relieved that Scarlett was the person accompanying Lizzie, but now she knew you two had something. You were tired of it honestly. The secret. All you wanted was for everyone to know how much you loved Lizzie. And judging from recent events, that was a problem for her too. Or at least it was enough for her to drink more than she should.

But you would have to wait until Lizzie woke up to have this conversation, so you went back to your room, and after putting away the clothes from your bag, you took a shower and put on your pajamas, wasting no time in joining Lizzie in bed again.

//-//-//

Caribbean, one year and six months ago.

Following the music, you continued to dance slowly, your hand around Lizzie's waist while the other was entwined in the air with hers.

The luxury hotel where you were staying that week was hosting a Hawaiian themed evening, and well, after spending the day in the pool area, you decided to dance a little.

In that moment, with Lizzie in your arms, you were at peace completely. Moments like these, like waking up with her in your bed, or cooking together, or rehearsing your lines while curled up on the couch under the blanket were more than enough to make you sure that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with Lizzie.

You smiled before pulling your body away slightly, just to look at her. And she looked back at you with the same adoration, her cheeks flushing slightly.

You spun her into your arms then, making her laugh as you pulled her back, your hands resting on her neck as your hips swayed to the rhythm of the ukulele of the band playing on the stage.

There were a few other couples around, but you could hardly notice anyone but Lizzie.

You continued dancing, and you rested your forehead on hers, closing your eyes and breathing in her perfume. Lizzie smiled, stealing a quick kiss before resting her chin on your shoulder, following the rhythm of the dance.

When the show ends, you follow the crowd in the clapping for a moment before Lizzie entwines your hands and pulls you toward the bar.

"That was fun." She comments with cheeks flushed from the dance, her smile soft as you stand near each other, your hands intertwined as you reach for the menu.

"Dancing with you always is." You retorted charmingly, releasing her hand only to fit it against your waist, drawing a chuckle from Lizzie.

You ended up sharing some drinks and snacks, and you were starting to feel higher with each sip.

Lizzie was in the middle of a joke when you interrupted her.

"Marry me?"

She blinked in surprise, a confused chuckle escaping her lips.

"What?"

Maybe it was the drinking. Probably not, because with the emerald eyes looking so intently, you suddenly felt very sober. Your heart raced too, but you were never more sure of anything than you were now.

"Marry me." You repeat with a confident smile. Lizzie blushes with wide eyes.

"You... Are you serious?" She asks in surprise, and you let out a sigh, moving closer to take her hands and put them down on your racing heart.

"I love you." You tell her with nothing but sincerity. "I want to spend my life with you. I was planning something bigger, perhaps, at your parents' summer house. I would get down on one knee in front of your family and hand over the ring I've been carrying for three months." You confess and watch her look at you in shock. "I've been waiting for the right moment, Lizzie. But I've just realized that every second with you is the right moment. I want you to be my wife. Do you want me to be yours?"

It took a second for her to react, her expression changing from shock to pure happiness, the tears appearing in her eyes and the smile so big it made her eyes small.

"Yes, yes, of course." She replied between one shy laugh and another, moving forward to kiss you over and over again.

You couldn't stop smiling as you kissed her, and you giggled against each other's mouths, pulling apart to embrace each other.

It didn't take long for the people around the bar to notice and start clapping, but you didn't care.

All you were seeing was your future wife.

//-//-//-//

California, 1 year and 9 months ago.

You finished putting the coffee jug on the tray, the last missing item, before carrying it to your room, taking careful steps not to trip over anything on the way.

Lizzie was already awake, but still in bed. The glass of water in her hands and the missing pill on her bedside table indicated that she was already treating her hangover.

"Good morning, darling." You greeted as you entered, walking over to the bed to leave the platter on top of the sheet next to Lizzie.

"You're home." She commented in a mixture of surprise and embarrassment, you just made a noise with your mouth as she sighed, running her hand over her face, probably because of her headache. "When did you get home?"

"Last night." You respond by watching her. "Just before you."

"Sorry." She says moving closer. You gently pull away from her attempt to kiss her lips, and Lizzie frowns. "What?"

"I was worried." You state seriously. Lizzie lets out a sigh, leaning her back against the bed completely. "I thought you were going to pick me up at the airport, but you didn't call. And then I find the house empty. Until you arrived, completely drunk at dawn."

Lizzie crossed her arms, looking away. It was your turn to sigh.

"What's happening, Elizabeth?"

"It 's nothing."

"Elizabeth."

"Stop it." She asks impatiently, turning her face to you again. "Don't call me that."

You just frown in confusion. "It's your name."

"No." She exclaims annoyedly, closing her eyes for a moment. "You only call me Elizabeth when you're angry. And you can't be angry at me because I have the right to go out!"

You watch her stand up, as if running away from the conversation, and you sigh impatiently, massaging your temple with your finger. Lizzie begins to remove her dress, clearly intent on going to take a shower.

"I never said you had no right to go out, Elizabeth." You retort ignoring the annoyed grunt she lets out at you continuing to call her by her full name. "I just think I have the right to ask why after we agreed on something, you changed plans at the last minute and decided to disappear."

"It's funny that you want to demand something from me when you've spent the last few months without giving me any satisfaction of where or who you were with!" She accuses angrily and you grimace in indignation.

"Oh, so it's about my work?" You retort angrily. "The last time I checked we had decided that I was going to record and come home. You said you were fine with that!"

Lizzie gave a humorless laugh, her dress falling to her feet as she worked to remove her bra.

"Well, you know what, I wasn't!" She shouts angrily, throwing the bra angrily into the closet. You need to remember that you are angry with her as you have the vision of her breasts exposed in front of you while she is yelling at you. "I didn't agree to the endless get-togethers with all those sluts around you! And I sure didn't agree with your flushed face on television flirting with Emilia Clarke in front of the whole country!"

You stared at Lizzie in shock, but she just grunted in irritation before turning to go to the bathroom.

"No, I think it's so funny you bring that up, you know, Elizabeth." You spoke aloud as you stood up to follow her. "Because when I said Aubrey Plaza was flirting with you, you told me it was just business. But suddenly, Emilia is something that bothers you!"

"God, this is so different from Aubrey!" she retorts in irritation, finally naked, before stepping into the shower. You were beginning to find it hard to remember why you were fighting now that you had the view of her wet silhouette in the shower stall, as she raised her voice to be heard beyond the sound of the water. "We were supposed to be flirting in the interviews, it was all for the movie. You were just falling all over Emilia for no reason. All those smiles and giggles." She declares angrily, making you bite back a smile. Lizzie naked, angry and jealous was hot as hell.

"I really can't believe we are having this conversation." You complain as you unbutton your pajama shirt. "The most absurd part of it all is you thinking I would have anything with anyone else."

"You say these things but don't live up to them with your actions." She retorts, annoyed. "I wouldn't think anything of it if you didn't flirt with other people!"

"I didn't flirt with anyone!" You return defensively, your blouse finally coming off. Lizzie's annoyed expression almost falters, but she keeps her gaze above your breasts as you take off your pants. "And honestly, none of this would be happening if everyone knew we were dating!"

Lizzie frowns, her anger finally dissipating with your sentence. You step into the shower stall with her, and she looks at you dubiously.

"You...you want to go public?" She asks, studying you as the water falls on her back. You swallow dryly, keeping yourself in front of her.

"Only if you want to."

Lizzie holds out her hand for you to take, and when you do, she pulls you gently until your breasts are almost touching.

"Do you think we're ready for that?" She whispers as your foreheads lean against each other. You sigh as you rest your hands on her waist.

"With you, I'm ready for anything, Lizzie."

She sighs against your lips, her hands moving up to your neck.

"I can't think about that with you naked in front of me." She mumbles before moving forward against his lips.

Kissing shouldn't feel this good.

You slide your tongue over hers a moment later, and you both sigh in need, feeling the effects of so much time apart. Your hands move down to her ass, squeezing the flesh and forcing her against you, and the direct contact of exposed skin makes Lizzie whimper.

You press her against the glass of the shower stall, feeling the shower water against your back as you hold your mouths together in a passionate, hungry kiss.

When air was needed, you ran your kisses down your girlfriend's exposed collarbone, enjoying the way she sighed in anticipation, her hand moving up to the back of your neck to encourage you.

"God, I missed you." You sighed before sucking on the sensitive spot on her collarbone, making Lizzie whimper as she dug her nails into your shoulder.

She pulled your face back to hers, kissing you urgently, and you pressed your body against hers, your hands moving down to her thighs and up so that she entwined her legs around your waist.

The contact of your exposed intimates together made you both gasp in the kiss, but you slid your tongue against hers again, savoring her taste as your hands moved up to her breasts, squeezing and cupping them with a full palm, your fingers playing with her hardened nipples and making Lizzie sigh wetly.

"What is it baby?" you teased when she was unable to keep up the pace of the kiss, throwing her head back as she felt your hands pressing her breasts hard, and Lizzie grunted as she bit her lips to keep from moaning, looking up at you with dark eyes, clearly struggling to keep her expression impassive. You smiled, pressing your hips forward and watching her close her eyes tightly, unable to contain a low moan that escaped her throat. "I want to hear you, baby."

"I'm still mad at you." She declares in an affected voice, and you murmur in understanding, lowering your face to her collarbone, and licking and kissing the skin, making her shiver.

"Is this angry sex, then?" You sneer as you move your hips forward again, the sensation bringing a rising wave of pleasure to both of you. "It doesn't seem like it."

Lizzie sighs impatiently, and puts her legs on the floor, pushing you away by your shoulder.

You are so stunned by the sudden break in contact that you barely have time to absorb her turning off the shower before she pulls you by the hand out of the stall.

You were about to ask what she was going to do, but she pushed you onto the bed, and disappeared into the closet.

"Lizzie?" You called out uncertainty, preparing your apology speech for what exactly you couldn't say. But she walked out next, and the sight made your mouth go dry. "Damn."

Elizabeth was wearing a strap-on, the rubber penis already fitted in the front and ready for use. And from the determined expression on her face, she was more than willing to prove to you that she was pissed.

"Fuck me." You breathed aroused by the view, and Lizzie gave a wry chuckle as she approached the bed.

"Oh, I will." It was her only warning before she broke the distance, kissing you fervently, her tongue exploring your mouth and pulling the air from your lungs, making you see stars.

You let out a low moan, moving your hands up to her waist to pull her to you, but Lizzie pushed your hands away, breaking the kiss and moving one hand up to your neck, squeezing lightly as she made you look at her.

"Knees, ass up." She commanded in a husky voice, her gaze glittering with lust, you bit your lips to keep from moaning again, feeling your pussy pulsate with desire as you obeyed, turning on the bed quickly as Lizzie positioned herself behind you. "I'll teach you not to flirt with other girls."

"I was n-fuck." Your speech turned into an horsy whimper as she suddenly penetrated you with the dildo, you were so wet that she had no problem at all, the toy slipping into your folds with ease, filling you completely. Lizzie chuckled breathlessly, her hands steadying your hips.

"God, you're so hot." She murmured, moving slowly inside you, the action making you clench your fists in the sheets and arch your back, your pussy clenching against the dildo.

"Fuck, Lizzie."

She thrust again, this time hard, her hands squeezing your hips as she went deep inside, making you moan loudly.

Before establishing a rhythm, she leaned against you, her hand coming up to your hair and pulling you back as she brought her mouth to your ear.

"You are mine." She whispered before she thrust hard inside you, making you moan. "Do you understand?"

"Not quite yet, try harder." You teased breathlessly, the pleasure at having the dildo all the way inside you making you half dizzy. Lizzie grunted angrily, this time stroking even harder, making you see stars as you whimpered, your body beginning to tremble.

"Quit being a brat or I'm going to fucking stop." She warned against your ear, thrusting more slowly this time, and you moaned breathlessly, barely able to keep your eyes open.

Lizzie set a slow pace, but thrusting hard as you moaned and whimpered, every time the dildo entered you making you even wetter and aroused, to the point that you were unable to hold back the loud moans, and she giggled.

"Look at you, a horny, begging mess." She sneered against your ear. "You are mine, and only mine."

She whispered, her strokes deep inside you. "I want you to remember that when you flirt with other girls. How good I make you feel."

You whimpered, your pussy clenching against the dildo for more, Lizzie keeping the strokes torturously slow. Seeing your state, she laughed softly, pulling out of you completely.

Before you had time to complain, she turned you over on the bed, spreading your legs as she bent down, thrusting deep inside you. Your moan died against her lips as she kissed you hard, laying against you as she buried the dildo inside you.

You could feel Lizzie everywhere. Her breasts against you, her lips on yours, and it was too much. She thrust hard again, deep and fast as you had your legs around her waist, and her tongue on yours, and you began to tremble in spasms, pleasure spreading throughout your body.

Lizzie smiled against your lips as you lost the ability to respond to the kiss, moaning and whimpering at the closeness of your climax. Her mouth moved down to your neck as she kept up the pace of the thrusts inside you, and your hands tightened around her waist, pulling on her hips for more friction.

It wasn't long before you fell over the edge, the tightness under your belly exploding, the pleasure spreading to the tips of your feet as you moaned against Lizzie's ear, crumbling under her.

As you tried to normalize your breathing after such an intense orgasm, she straightened to look at you, her eyes had adoration in them.

"You did so good." She praised against your lips. "Did you learn your lesson?"

"I did." You replied in a husky voice, taking a deep breath to control the effects of climax.

In one swift motion, you spun you two around on the bed, sighing as you felt the toy move inside you.

"Now you will learn to honor your appointments, Miss Olsen." You warned as your hands moved down to the latches of the strap, removing it as Lizzie bit her lips, looking at you with a mischievous gaze.

You shifted to remove the strap and toss the toy on the floor, returning to sit on Lizzie's lap, your mouth returning to hers immediately.

When she began to move beneath you, you smiled against her lips, pulling away as you rested your forehead against hers and let your fingers play with her wet entrance.

"Use your mouth." She asked breathlessly, her nails digging into your arm.

"My baby wants my mouth?" You teased, moving forward to lick her lips and pulling away with a short laugh when she moaned as she chased your mouth unsuccessfully. You circled her clitoris with your fingers, and Lizzie gasped. "The next time you want to get drunk, at least text me, my love." You warned as you penetrated her with two fingers at once, feeling her hot and slippery, while Lizzie moaned loudly against your mouth. "Do you understand?"

You removed your fingers, playing with her entrance until she nodded frantically, pushing her hips toward your hand. But you laughed lightly, pulling your hand away completely, and leaving her with a confused expression.

"I thought you wanted my mouth." You scoff, already ducking, as Lizzie looks at you expectantly.

"God, you always fuck me so good." Lizzie comments as you kiss her thighs, moving down. You smile against her skin, finally reaching her pussy.

You stare at her before moving forward, your tongue against her clitoris as she sighs with need.

"Don't torture me." She begs breathlessly, her wrists locked on the bed, you smile, lingeringly licking her, and she closes her eyes tightly.

"I won't, my love." You assure her before returning your mouth to her pussy, kissing her entrance before you begin to suck and lick, devouring her with desire.

She moans loudly, letting out affected sighs with each movement of your tongue inside her, and you hold her thighs to keep her open for you as you eat her out.

It doesn't take long for Lizzie to reach her edge, already near the limit from fucking you, but it's still delicious to have her crumbling against your mouth like a weeping mess, her orgasm on your tongue as she screams your name.

You climb your body back up onto her, and kiss her tenderly, unlike anything so far.

Lizzie is trying to control her breathing from the climax, but sighs in satisfaction as she tastes herself on your tongue.

As silence falls over you, you sigh lightly, your hands caressing her face.

"Are we okay, Lizzie?" You ask as you settle down to lie across from each other. She leans into the touch of your hands, as her hands come up to your waist.

"I don't know." She confesses. "But I want us to be."

You smile, using your finger to take a strand of hair from her face and tuck it behind her ear.

"Do you think going public will make us better?"

"I don't want to love you in secret anymore." She says and you feel your heart soar. "Do you understand?"

You smile. "Yes, babe. I feel the same way."

She gives a relieved smile, her gaze passionate. You break the distance, and kiss her gently.

When you break the kiss a moment later, you look quickly at your bodies. "I think we should have this conversation with clothes on." You comment and Lizzie giggles.

"Later. Now I show how much I missed you in my bed." She says before bringing your lips together again.

You certainly wouldn't object to that.

//-//-//

Atlanta, three years ago.

You hesitated at the entrance to the restaurant.

Through the window you could see Lizzie, and all your cast mates, as it was the closing celebration of the WandaVision filming.

You swallowed hard, the object in your pocket suddenly becoming too heavy.

You startled slightly when you felt a hand on your shoulder.

"I guess we're both late, huh?" Kathryn Hahn, your cast mate, remarked gently, putting her car keys away in her pocket clearly having arrived right with you.

You gave her a lopsided smile and she noticed your hesitation, assuming a worried expression.

"Everything okay?" She asked.

You shifted your gaze to the window again, watching Lizzie giggle shyly, her gaze shining slightly. She looked around too, searching, and you knew it was for you.

"Yeah, I just...I was just having a moment of doubt." You say still looking at Lizzie. Kathryn followed your gaze, and smiled, but didn't comment on it.

You sighed, reaching into your pocket and pulling out the object.

"Wow, are you going to...?" Kathryn asked in surprise but you gave a humorless laugh.

"No, I couldn't." You say swallowing dryly, and looking away from the velvet box. "I don't know if I'm ready."

"And when either of us are?" Kat returned, making you smile.

"How did you know you were going to say yes to your husband?" You asked next. Kathryn sighed thoughtfully.

"I didn't." She replied. "There's no way to know until you get asked. But what I did know was that I loved him. And that's what really matters."

You absorbed her words in silence, and then put the box back in your pocket.

"I think she loves me." You say. "That will be enough until I find the right moment."

Kat murmurs in understanding, and then pushes her shoulder against yours lightly.

"Just don't wait too long." She warns with a smile, nodding her head signaling for the two of you to enter the restaurant and join the rest of the team.

When you enter, any thoughts of Lizzie denying your marriage proposal are driven out by the image of her contented smile when she sees you arrive.

//-//-//-//

A/F/N> I'm not even gonna try to say this is the last time i'm continuing this work because at this point, I just know I don't believe my own words anymore haha. Tell me what you think people.

Tag> @imapotatao / @aimezvousbrahms/ @ensorcellme/ @helloalycia || @mionemymind / @abimess / @stephanieromanoff / @yourtaletotell / @tomy5girls / @justagaypanicking / @thegayw1tch / @idek-5 // @myperfectlovepoem // @helloalycia // @ENSORCELLME // @AIMEZVOUSBRAHMS // @drpepperobsessed // @sighsam // @olsensnpm // @sxfwap // @table57 // @madamevirgo // @causeitswhatjesuswouldfreakingdo // @emptysince18x // @xastrydx || @yuhloversxx || @ymzki-haruki || @wouldirunofftheworldsomeday || @lostandsearching || @lezzzbehonesthere || @musicinourlips || @chaekhan || @diaryoflife || @nervoustrack || @aquamarinescarlet || @cristin-rjd || @idamaemann || @fortunatelynerdylight

[hoodiewithhorns]

━ using your safe word scenarios ★

characters : hajime iwaizumi, tetsuro kuroo, keiji akaashi.

there will be a part 2 & 3 coming soon!

edit : p.2 is out <3

m.sterlist + requests box

▲ cw : not proof read, angst, use of safeword, “red” used as the safeword, clit spanking, mean!doms, hurt/comfort, established relationship, forced orgasm, jealousy, oral m! receiving, facefucking, foreplay f! receiving, degradation, slight punishment if you squint, aftercare/reassurance , all characters are 18+, MDNI ▼

Kuroo

- you weren’t necessarily in a good mood to be fucked roughly by him

- you just wanted some soft passionate sex with kuroo

- You assumed he’d figure out what you wanted due to him knowing you better than yourself.

- But you were wrong..very wrong.

-Not wanting to disappoint your boyfriend you played along.

- biggest mistake.

〜 ☆

you bobbed your head on his cock while he groaned at the slow pace. you were taking your time today since you weren’t in the best mood to be shoving him down your throat. you thought he take this as a sign of you wanting things slow soft and sweet, instead he took this as a sign of you being bratty, a brat who deserves punishment in his eyes.

“you little brat.” he forcefully shoved his cock down your throat. You gagged in response feeling your eyes become glossy, tears promising to spill at any given minute, looking up at him with pleading eyes hoping he’d show some form of mercy. but of course, he didn’t. tightening the grip on your hair he moved you back and forth on his cock causing you to gag and your breathing becoming heavy.

you heart ached in your chest as you tried to push him off, but to no avail. a dark chuckle leaving his throat as he watched you struggle, a sight he would commonly enjoy. “such a bad girl today huh? maybe i should go find another goodgirl. one that’ll actually listen.” you tried to shake your head as fat tears streamed down your face, the thought of him replacing you being one your biggest fears. did he mean that? just cause you weren’t in a good mood he was gonna replace you? you thought to yourself noticing the grip he had on you loosened a little. you could move away now and so you did. pulling away from his cock trying to catch your breath only causing him to get angrier. “why are you being so bad today? why cant you be a goodgirl and-“

“Red!” you choked out a sob as more tears fell from your face staining the bed sheets beneath you. sitting up, your palms resting on your thighs as you sobbed. the room went silent with the only sound present being your soft cries alongside with your occasional sniffles. confused he lifted your chin up, you pathetically looked up at him like a helpless little puppy. he finally understood what was wrong, mumbling a few curses as he got closer to you, sitting you on his lap as you cried into his chest.

“easy now baby. i’m so sorry...” he whispered thanking whatever was above that he hadn’t lost you, feeling horrible for not picking up the obvious signs you weren’t in the mood for any of this.

“d-do you really wanna l-leave me?” your voice was hoarse from one getting your throat fucked and two crying. hugging you tighter and feeling nothing but regret. each cry you let out tugged at his heartstrings. he never wanted this how could he have been so blind? you were his little baby he wanted to protect every chance he got. now you were here. sobbing into his chest all because he didn’t realize you weren’t in the right mood today. 

“never prettygirl. i’d be devastated without you in my life... I didn’t mean that I promise.” he pulled you away from his chest to face you. kissing the few tears you had left on you. even with tears pampered all over your face, to him you still managed to be pretty. even if it hurt him since he was the reason for all this, you could tell he was on the brink of tears too. he couldn’t imagine a life without you without his precious girlfriend in his life he’d be a train wreck.

“i-i...i just wanted us to go nice and gentle tonight..i didn’t have a good day today..but i didn’t want you to be mad since you like it when its rough so..”

he let out a chuckle at your last sentence causing you to look at him in confusion. “yeah being rough is nice and all but its only nice when you’re in the right mindset for it. you should’ve told me you weren’t feeling it tonight baby. If you wanna get fucked nice and gently by me you should’ve just said so my love.” he says planting a kiss on your forehead.

you smiled, reverting back to your previously cheery self making kuroo more than happy. he rested his head on top your shoulder “if you want, we can try again baby. this time i’ll give it to you nice and sweet..you’d like that wouldn’t you my pretty baby?” he whispers into your ear planting kisses down your neck as you let out a whimper feeling him smirk against your neck.

“mm-mhm please tetsu...”

he wastes no time wrapping his arms around your waist as your cunt feels him hardening again. “whatever my baby wants who am i to deny?”

akaashi

- the thought of using your safeword never occurred to you when you were with akaashi

- in fact he suggested it just in case things took a turn you didn’t like

- tonight was different though you were his innocent girlfriend who just wanted to treat him the way he treats you so lovingly

- wearing nothing but his shirt accompanied by a cute pair of panties feeling confident about your plan to please your boyfriend.

- though it doesn’t go according to plan,

you saw him sitting on the bed reading a novel still in his formal clothing. You were feeling particularly needy tonight learning a few new things you read from the internet a week ago on how to please your boyfriend sexually. you did however feel a bundle of nerves fill you up, but you just assumed it was because this was something you’ve never done before to anyone.

akaashi was not only your first, but he was your first boyfriend your first everything when it came to romance. now, putting all your insecurities aside, you were going to try out what you learned tonight on your beloved boyfriend!

 walking towards him, you crawled on top of his lap, arms wrapped around his neck to pull him in for a sweet kiss. he smirked setting his book down on the nightstand while taking his glasses off as well.

“Can I help you pretty girl?” he questioned placing his hands on your hips. “oh nothing...i just want you tonight..is that okay?” you asked, your innocent voice making akaashi smile. you were just so cute and pure in his eyes. you jump in excitement ready to initiate your plan to please your boyfriend. you started kissing him slowly yet passionately, grinding your wet cunt against his slowly hardening cock through his pants.

he opened his eyes to clearly understand what you were doing. to his shock what he assumed was correct. His innocent girlfriend who had no knowledge on how to please her boyfriend grinding up against him. maybe you were just being extra needy? he told himself. not longer after he snapped back to reality as he felt you pull away from him only to kiss down his jaw leaving a trail of soft kisses.

His cheeks becoming red as your soft lips traced down to unbutton his shirt. “so handsome..” You said kissing his chest as you went down to his abdomen. he would be lying if he said he wasn’t enjoying this, but.... Your not gonna do what he thinks you are right?? his own girlfriend who was too shy who cried at the first attempt to sucking him off?? no he must be getting ahead of himself.

looking down once more to check up on you, he finds you unbuckling his pants letting his cock spring free. his mouth agape seeing your head already lick his precum nice and clean, pumping him a few times to get all his precum out. he shudders as your wet tongue touches his cock, giving him kitten licks here and there. taking a deep breath, shoving him down your throat all in one go, a small gag escaping from you, squeezing your eyes tightly trying your best not to cry.

humming, you bobbing back and forth making him grunt at the waves of pleasure you were giving him. Still, he felt uneasy. who taught you this?? he was always the one guiding you, teaching you how to do things yet here you were sucking him down your pretty little throat. head thrown back his groans mixed with his thoughts, he kept overthinking the reasons as to how you picked up on this.

did Bokuto teach you?? you two always got along so well..sometimes leaving akaashi to third wheel, but why was he thinking about that now??

 “shit..” he grunted as he felt his high approaching. He tried to pull your head back so he wouldn’t end up cumming in your mouth, but you stayed on his cock till he came.

smiling at him, you licked your lips, swallowing his cum. leaving him surprised at everything you’ve just done. you’ve never did any of this nor tried to. It hurt the first time you tried to give him head now here you are taking him down your throat? He couldn’t believe it.

he wanted to get to the bottomed of this quickly.

“dirty girl.” he spits out flipping you to the other side of the bed, pushing your head down to the pillow putting your ass up with your cunt in full display for him. you winced at the sudden aggressive force.

“who taught you all those things you little slut?”hooking his finger onto your soaked panties to push them aside, he shoved two fingers deep inside of your dripping hole making you whimper at the painful stretch, not giving you enough time to adjust as he pumped into you.

“k-keiji w-wait!!” you whined screwing your eyes shut to fight back your tears, while he started pumping his fingers at an inhuman pace, he hovered over you, your back to his chest while his head rested on your shoulder.

“i asked you a question, so I expect an answer.” his voice was cold and stern without a sound of love or worry. the stretch of his fingers were painful especially with how he was practically scissoring you open. your eyes rolled at to the back of your head feeling your climax approaching, but it hurt so much you weren’t used to such a rough pace.

akaashi always took his time with you. Going slow and easy, praising you, calling you his angel or goodgirl for taking him in so well. but now he was none of these things.this felt like a completely different person to what you were use to.

“mm’ n-no one! keiji- p-please s-slow down it hurts!!” you sobbed only making him click his tongue at you, your heart sank feeling foggy and uneasy.“you probably like that it hurts huh? you’re dripping around my fingers you filthy slut.” he never used a tone as harsh as this before. never calling you names or degrading you in general. the pain in your chest overlapping the pleasure as more tears fall.

“n-no not a s-slut!! p-please stop! it hurts please keiji please-“ you begged feeling your stomach tighten as he kept fingering you till you screamed, squirting all over the bed sheets. “dirty slut.” He pulled out abruptly from you causing you to choke out another sob. your body trembling at this point as you pant out in desperation to form words scared of what he might do next. “N-no more please I’ll be good i p-promise just please..” you begged him once again, hoping he’d notice the pain you were in...he didn’t.

“no. sluts like you don’t get to make decisions like that.” He was about to pull your shirt off until you screamed and kicked  “red! red! r-red!!” he moved away only to watch you curl in on yourself, hugging your knees for comfort, refusing to look him in the eyes. “baby..?” he said softly trying to move you to face him to his horror you flinched shrinking in on yourself.

“keiji... why were you s-so...mean to me i only wanted to make you feel good..you always make me feel good so why did you..” immediately, he scooped you into his arms rocking you back and forth as if you were a toddler. you cuddled up against his chest as he felt your tears fall on his chest.he didn’t mind of course. “shh its okay..its okay..” the voice he commonly spoke to you coming back, soft, reassuring, just how you liked it.

“baby..im sorry i.. I didn’t mean to be so mean..i just got scared you were maybe..well someone might’ve been teaching you these things..” you froze pulling away to look at him.

“w-what? I didn’t learn that from anyone..id never let anyone teach me or touch me but you keiji! i just..read some stuff about it online...and I wanted to test it out..” you admitted through sniffles still rubbing your tears away. He sighed as he hugged you again running his fingers through your hair. 

all you wanted was to please your boyfriend from just that, his heart skipped a beat at how sweet you were being, but the feeling was overshadowed by  feeling so stupid for letting his insecurities take the best of him.

“I’m sorry baby.. I promise to never speak to you like that ever again..you’re my sweet girl and I love you so so much.. you were just trying to do something nice for me..thank you i appreciate it my love..it felt really nice you did good.” He cupped your face in his hands, peppering soft kisses around your face.

he smiled as you giggled at the ticklish feeling, sighing in relief.

“ i love you, my sweetgirl. ”

Iwaizumi

- he got home pissed off since he saw you chatting and giggling with mattsun. 

- he needed to blow off some steam

- he didn’t mean to be so mean he really didn’t

-he was usually a soft dom but today..he was everything but soft to you.

“ filthy fucking whore. what were you doing talking to mattsun huh?” his thrusts were sharp, painful, not being prepped well enough by him making the stretch of his cock burn through your gummy walls. feeling the air in your lungs start to leave you slowly as tears streamed down your face at iwaizumis cold , heartless, tone. there was not a single trace of him, not a sign of his love. you weren't trying to make him jealous, you just spend sometime to get to know mattsun just a little more since he was friends with your boyfriend never expecting him to react like this. 

snapping back to your current situation, you arched your back letting out a loud cry as he slapped your puffy clit. “didn’t i ask you a fucking question? or did your dumb slutty brain already get fucked out of you huh?” he wrapped his hands around your throat thrusting harder and deeper in you. 

his tip painfully hitting your cervix with each thrust making you cry at the pain. you tried pushing him off with the little strength you had in you, sobbing out an apology making him roll his eyes. 

“tch, what? you think a little apology is gonna change the fact you were all “buddy buddy” with mattsun? did you forget who fucking owns you little slut?” landing another harsh slap at your clit causing you cry in discomfort. everything around you made you feel light as if you were gonna pass out from the cruel words iwaizumi spoke to you. feeling helpless as there was no sign of your once loving boyfriend. 

“maybe i should’ve invited him over, let him have a turn at ruining your slutty little cunt.”

Finally, having enough you cried out “r-red..” it was soft, gentle, easily could’ve been unheard if it wasn’t for how closely iwaizumi payed attention to you. he halted his thrusts pulling out of you completely, eyes draining of all lust and jealousy converting to concern mixed with regret. he rushed to put back his boxers on, cuddling you against his chest. 

you didn’t push him away, no you could never. he was the man you loved and treasured more than anything. you were hurt obviously, but still wanted to seek his comfort.

“i-i dont like m-mattsun haji..i only like you..only you..” your voice sounding broken. he let out a deep sigh pulling you closer to kiss your head. 

“i know baby i know... i was just jealous..you get along so well with mattsun i..went too far on you..i’m sorry you didn’t deserve that baby” his voice sounding faint but full of comfort.

“i just wanted to get t-to know him...i didn’t mean to make you mad haji..”

“i know baby shhh its okay now..i’m not mad anymore.”he cooed kissing you softly. you nodded letting your last set of tears fall onto his chest. 

slowly shutting your eyes and falling asleep in the warmth of his chest.

him on the other hand was completely mortified at your sobbing accompanied with your sniffles it echoed through his ears replaying like a broken record each time the memory got to you saying your safeword. 

“r-red..”

he never thought he’d reach that point for you to have to tell him that. he let out a few tears that night hating himself for hurting you. you forgave that very second he apologized but him on the other hand? he didn't..no he couldn’t.

let’s just say, he didn't get much sleep that weekend. 

akaashis is long asf (im sorry i just love him sm) and iwaiuzmis is short but i love these boys sm.  

i still am taking requests all links are above and down here. remember to drink water. oh and heres the m.sterlist  in case you missed it <3♡

[takaraphoenix]

Ship game!! What about Nico and Will?? It’s pretty popular, but I don’t think I’ve seen you write much of it…

That's an interesting one in that I have vocalized my reasons for disliking it way back when it first became popular but instead of just linking that, it has been years so I think it's time for an updated version.

Firstly: This post is gonna be properly tagged and not crosstagged so if any shipper comes across it and feels the need to bitch about it, just don't; your lack of curating your own tumblr experience is not my problem! ;D

Now, there are three key factors that play into my dislike of this ship: How it was written, what it represents, how the fandom around it acts.

1. It’s rushed and uncomfortable

In BoO, it was incredibly rushed. They had literally five sentences of interactions before they walked into the literal sunset together. Five. It was just entirely born from Riordan's Noah's Ark Complex, where he just can't let people be single. The series was ending and he needed Nico to have an endgame so he rushed into some random romance with zero build-up.

The way their interactions went down was also severely uncomfortable for me. Will was acting so offended by Nico not wanting to go to camp and be friends in an entitled way that he had no right to be, he downright guilt-tripped Nico about how he had wanted to be friends. Nico has been just so severely traumatized at such a young age and his coping mechanism, as unhealthy as it was, was to run away and hide. Will acted like Nico not wanting to form attachments to people who could potentially leave him again was somehow just an Edgy Emo Decision and not a direct reaction to his trauma. His entire approach to Nico was basically all these hippie posts of "Don't have depression!! Just go out into the sun and stop being depressed!", which is already a bad take with non-medical people but he's supposed to be a doctor (and let's not get into the shadiness of him technically being Nico's doctor).

There is also an inherent "I can fix him" angle to this ship and to me, only few ship dynamics are more uncomfortable than that. If you want to fundamentally change a person's behavior and personality, you... don't actually want to be with this person.

Now, here's where my points overlap, because the following parts of their writing that bothers me also stand for what this ship fundamentally represents.

2. Solangelo is a queer ship written by and for straights

I'm a queer woman and as a queer woman, I want queer wish-fulfillment, not what straights want out of queerness. I'm kind of tired of that, I've been sitting through it for enough decades now. That's, of course, not to say that no straight writer can give proper queer representation, but far too often do straight writers - even the most well-meaning ones - project straight desires of queerness into their queer representation.

Let me explain that closer through this ship.

Nico's been in love with Percy for years and I'm going to do my best to not hijack this post with some Percico agenda; that's not what this his about, this isn't some "my ship is better than your ship" ship-war nonsense. It's simply a canonical fact that Nico has had romantic feelings for another character for years.

A character who, in this medium, is heterosexual. And if you're queer, you've been there. In love with your straight best friend. It's a cliche, but it's a cliche for a reason.

We have also all been well-meaningly rejected by said straight friend.

And here's the straight desires for you: The queer person who was in love with a straight person just immediately stops having those feelings and will then as quickly as possible fall in love with the next queer person they meet to be happy and no longer uncomfortably in love with a straight person, because that thought makes the straights uncomfortable.

Queer wish-fulfillment would be for Percy to return those feelings, for the queer character to get his first love, to not be rejected. That thing queer teens always dreamed about for themselves.

Aside from the wish-fulfillment angle, the pacing is another problem. Let me repeat, Nico was in love for years. But a five sentence conversation with Will once causes a crush on Will and we see him physically turn away from Percy and toward Will just immediately to rebound and actually fall out of love with Percy and in love with Will. Anyone who's ever been unlucky in love will attest to just how unrealistic and ridiculous the pacing here is.

It's also straight queerness in another respect; Nico has been the first ever queer character we meet in that world. He loves a straight guy - and to get over that, we introduce the second queer character. Because heaven forbid there are multiple queers to pick from. No, in straight-written queer romances, there is always that one main queer and then they introduce a second one and the two just immediately hit it off and develop a romance like all a queer person needs to form attraction to someone is the confirmation that the other person shares your sexuality.

Also the notable gay guy on gay guy ship here, whereas the more queer-wish-fulfillment option would have also included more nuance to the queer experience, because Percy doesn't have to be heterosexual just because he has only been with girls so far. It's a very old-fashioned - think 90s and early 2000s - kind of straight-written queerness that there are only exactly two homosexuals and that those two homosexuals then pair up.

And, listen, I'm not immune to these outdated straight-written queers entirely, I have many such ships that I grew up with that I am still fond of because they were groundbreaking at that time and they weren't outdated yet back when they happened in said 90s and early 2000s. I am however a grown woman now and just like I have grown, so has queer rep so I am not as easily baited into falling onto my knees in gratitude for canon rep. You have to go with the times. And this ship, by all that is given to us, is just entirely outdated straight-written rep.

Which, I mention earlier that even straight-written rep can be good. If the author tries. Riordan doesn't really try though; he does the bare minimum when he writes any of his rep - and there have been many, many more qualified voices being very vocal about his depiction of people of color and, as a woman, I've been vocal about his depiction of women. I don't want to derail this post with all of that, but I do think that it bears mentioning that Riordan doing rep but only doing a bare minimum and not putting in the necessary work to deepen the representation he wants to give is a repeating pattern that has been pointed out many times by now.

(I’d also like to point out that no, it is not just the ship and not just the listed instances that make it straight-written rep for straights. It’s Nico’s entire queer arc, starting with his forced coming out. A severely traumatizing event that is completely brushed over because the straight author doesn’t understand the impact this has on queer people. Not to mention the framework; Nico’s coming out isn’t Nico’s story, it happens in Jason’s POV, it is given to us through the POV of the straight bystander who gets to be Best Ally by assuring Nico that being gay is okay. This kind of coming out is not a queer wish-fulfillment, it’s a straight wish-fulfillment of getting to be the straight savior, the ally to show the gay the light of acceptance. And, additional to the ridiculous pacing of how fast Nico gets over his love for Percy, Nico also gets over years of internalized homophobia just because of, I don’t know, Jason’s few encouraging words and the fact that Will paid attention to him? For a gay kid who was in the closet all his life, the nonchalant way in which he publicly confessed his crush to Percy at the end made absolutely no sense and was written as basically a joke, finished off with Nico literally high-fiving Percy’s girlfriend despite those two never having seen eye to eye before but this is straight wish-fulfillment so all straights are Super Allies, because that’s the way straights want to see themselves, even though Annabeth has shown before just how jealous she can be and she most definitely wouldn’t go around high-fiving people who confess to her boyfriend. Nothing about Nico’s queer arc in HoO felt natural or queer or satisfying.)

Sure, Solangelo on a surface level is big because it's a canon queer couple in a YA book-series and kudos for that and yay for the kids who get to grow up seeing queers in YA books, but I actually do think that kids growing up with books written in the 2010s shouldn't grow up with 1990s levels of representation, because the 2010s overall are actually at a far more nuanced and better level of representation when it comes to queerness. And I do reserve the right to quit on too straight-written and too outdated queer rep in a landscape where I can get more satisfying representation elsewhere; we don’t live in times anymore where you necessarily have to love every bit of rep because it’s the only one you get.

Now that we've gone through my first two gripes, let's wrap this up with the final point, because it also directly ties into this.

3. The new wave of antis hiding behind this ship

A huge part of the fandom is so busy kissing Riordan's ass solely for giving them queer rep at all they think that both the author and the ship are beyond flawless and that kind of attitude is not good. Just because an author includes rep doesn't make either perfect. Absolutely no one is beyond critique - especially not when said critique comes from the very people the author is representing. And even beyond any "valid" critique on the ship, quite frankly, someone should also be allowed to just not like it, without any reasons given at all.

But there is a certain... protective obsessiveness about this ship that doesn't allow a not liking. Very similar to how PJO bore this mindset around Perc/abeth already. It's okay to have OTPs, even OTPs that you have a blindspot for and just don't want to see any flaws in. It is however not okay to then go around attacking people who don't like the thing and mind their own business.

Solangelo's bred a new generation of antis in this fandom. And, particularly with the fact that this post too receives an "anti" tag, I feel like there needs to be a clarification (because tumblr likes to forget what actually makes an anti). Not liking something doesn't make you an anti, venting in properly tagged posts doesn't either; it's the people who harass others, who seek out the content they dislike to then complain that it even exists and who actively try to make others stop creating for it - those are antis.

And with Solangelo's popularity, there was a high rise in Percico antis, who sought it out, were unnecessarily nasty about it, harrassed creators and tried to enforce some kind of "Solangelo supremacy" that won't allow other ships for the characters.

I've been in fandom long enough to be perfectly aware that not all Solangelo shippers count into this category and that there are completely normal and nice Solangelo shippers, but this is a Venn diagram where the overlap between Solangelo shippers and antis is too large to not widely associate the nasty people with the ship itself. (I've been there myself, shipping the very ship behind which a fandom's antis all hid. The second-hand embarrassment of having these people give the ship a bad name is horrendous and I do feel bad for all the normal Solangelo shippers.)

The more often I encountered these people, who made Percico bad (sometimes in wildly ridiculous manners that bent and deliberately misinterpreted canon) and who in the same breath praised Solangelo high, the more tired I grew of that ship. It's a simple game of association, really. You see that linked to the gross and nasty behavior and you start associating the ship itself with that gross and nasty behavior - and with all the things I said before that already weighed into my dislike of the ship, this just was the final tipping point, really.

And that's it. That sums up why I dislike Solangelo. It was hastily rushed, uncomfortable in its execution, it is outdated rep that very much feels as straight-written as it factually is and it does not feel aimed at me as a queer person but rather at the straight audience and it has gathered a cult following of quite uncomfortable people who on their own would be reason enough to avoid it so you can avoid them.

Send me a ship and I will explain why I do or don't ship it

[nanaminokanojo]

BLOOM | Sukuna X You | Part 3/3 [COMPLETED]

CHARACTERS: Sukuna X You | Gojo Satoru | Geto Suguru | Shoko Ieiri | Maki | Fushiguro Toji | Baby Megumi | Megumi's Mom (OC) CHAPTER COUNT: 3/3 WORD COUNT: 10,900+ GENRE: romance | fluff | slight angst | smut | ooc sukuna | female reader | modern au CHAPTER TRIGGER WARNING: profanity/strong language | alcohol use | age gap | smut/sexual intercourse SPOILERS: N/A

collection masterlist

one two three | Bloom Masterlist

“You up for it?”

You were sitting at your usual spot at Maki’s. It was still quite early so the pub wasn’t as crowded as it usually is, and it was a weekday. You were there to meet Sukuna but the owner suddenly started chatting you up like she usually does, beating around the bush for a bit before she finally asked you a favor. Apparently, they’re under-staffed and is in need of another waitress but hiring a new one was out of the question since it was a temporary post, just until the person who really works for her recovers from a broken ankle.

“It’s just from four in the afternoon to eight on weekdays, and since you’re usually hanging around here during those times, I thought of asking you. We’re just really short of hands for the next week,” she said, flashing you a rueful smile. “I asked Ieiri but she’s in the middle of her internship.”

Maki had been there for you before, talking to you when you had issues you couldn’t share with your friends and always giving you free non-alcoholic drinks during your exams, and you didn’t see anything wrong with helping her out for once. You’ll earn from it, too. “Sure. When do I begin?”

She clapped her hands excitedly which took you aback. She’s always so tough, barking orders here and there or putting rowdy customers in their proper places, that you didn’t really expect her to be all giggly and excited all of a sudden. “You’ll do it?”

“Yeah, why not?”

She hugged you then. “Oh my god, Y/N. Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

You waved her aside, chuckling. “It’s fine. It’s for a week anyway. No big deal.”

She sighed in relief. “You don’t know how much weight you’ve taken off my shoulders, so it is a big deal. Okay for you to start on Monday?”

You nodded.

“I’m giving you all the cherry blossom tea smoothie you want.” She grinned cheekily at you then. “And speaking of cherry blossoms, I noticed you and Sukuna coming here together. Are you together now?”

You felt your face heating up at the mention of the man's name but you shook your head. "Not yet."

"Yet?"

You chuckled awkwardly. "We're working it out, I guess. We're not exclusively dating though and he isn't my boyfriend..." You felt a bit uncomfortable at the thought. It's the first time you're saying it out loud, what Sukuna isn't to you, and you had to admit the notion was kinda disappointing. But the problem was with you. "Yeah...just that."

"He likes you though. I see the way he looks at you." Maki smiled knowingly at you. "Does this have something to do with your no dating policy? It's ridiculous if you ask me. Sukuna is a good man."

Ah, straightforward as always. "I know that. That's why I'm letting him have a go at changing my mind."

"And is he successful so far?"

"He's almost there." You frowned then, catching her comment about him. "You seem to know him well."

"We go way back," Maki explained. "My old man still owns the pub when he was a student and he came here all the time listening to me and that old geezer fight."

"Oh. That must have been a sight."

"Plus he's friends with my cousin, Toji."

You tilted your head in question. Sukuna never really talked about his friends, and he has never introduced you to any of them. It’s the first time you’re hearing about that side of him. “Really? What was he like back then?”

Maki snorted. “He was an idiot who had too much time in his hands. He’s smart, but had a penchant for mischief. I mean, I guess you already figured that out just looking at him. Nobody really thought he would end up to be this big-shot architect.”

You laughed. “Really?”

“Toji’s influence, I guess. That one’s a bigger idiot.” She looked deep in thought for a moment then said, “Why his wife chose him instead of Sukuna is a puzzle.”

You were confused. You did not know what she was talking exactly, and why her cousin’s wife should have chosen Sukuna was beyond you. For some reason, you didn’t have a good feeling about it, then you remembered what he told you before about dating just one person.

Could it be… “No…” You didn’t even realize you said that out loud until Maki held onto your hand, squeezing gently.

“I’m sorry. I said too much.”

“Well, don’t stop now,” you found yourself saying, unable to help it. “Is the situation what I think it is? Your cousin’s wife…He told me before that he only ever steadily dated one girl. Is it…?”

Maki nodded, grimacing. “They cheated on him six years ago.”

“So, he lost his girlfriend and best friend?” You felt your heart break at the thought. You might not have known him back then, but you couldn’t help but feel bad on his behalf.

“Yes. I’m not saying it’s his fault, but he’s hardly ever there since he was busy.”

“It’s not enough grounds for them to do that!” you stated loudly, feeling genuinely hurt for him. Damn, if he dated just one woman ever and never had a relationship again before you – for six years – then that spoke volumes of how much it affected him afterwards. You caught yourself and flashed Maki an apologetic look. “I’m sorry.”

“Understandable.” She sighed. “He went overseas and didn’t come back until just two years ago. Guess why he came back.”

“Why?”

“To attend their wedding.”

You didn’t know what was more messed up, but you also know Sukuna to be a genuinely good person. If he disappeared for that long only to come back to attend his best friend and ex’s wedding, then it only meant he totally forgave them. If he was giving another relationship a chance, particularly with you, then it also meant he has healed. How he could be so caring and affectionate towards you despite what he went through astonished you, but maybe that’s just how he really was as a person.

“Are they okay now?”

“Yes.” She laughed slightly then. “You should see how he dotes on Toji’s son.”

Maki ruffled your hair, seeing how you’ve reacted. “Just one piece of unsolicited advice, Y/N. If you decide to be with him, be certain about it and don’t ever hurt him.”

You only nodded, taking her words to heart. She was right. Just as you were afraid to be left alone, nobody deserves to be hurt like that. You wanted to be angry at the fact that his own best friend did that to him but at the same time, you were proud of him for coming out of it while maintaining a good view about the whole concept of relationships and perhaps love. It radiated in the way he treated you, and all the effort he is putting into making things work despite your hesitations.

He arrived a few moments later, showing you that crooked smile of his. You both had one beer, and over that, he asked about your day and he told you about yours. When you were finished with your drinks, he said, “Mind going out for a drive? I wanted to tell you something.”

“Okay.” You couldn’t meet his eyes after what Maki told you, and several times, he asked if you were okay to which you responded affirmatively, trying to keep your emotions at bay.

Sukuna took you to the cliffs just around the city limits, parking his car a few yards from the edge enough to have a good view of the sea of lights below. When he killed the engine, you disembarked from his Jeep, walking closer to the edge when you felt his hand on your arm.

“Not too close to the edge,” he said, looking at you with concern written all over his face, but before he could ask what was bothering you, you said, “You were going to tell me something.”

At that, he sighed as if in long-suffering. “Yes, that.” He looked at you seriously as if he was going to tell you something grave only to end up saying, “I’m going to be away for two weeks starting Monday. I’m going to London.”

Momentarily forgetting about your conversation with Maki, you blinked, not knowing whether to laugh or cry. “Why did you have to look like you’re about to tell me you’re going to be executed or something? Jesus, Sukuna.” You laughed despite yourself.

“Don’t laugh. I’m annoyed.” He pouted. “Aren’t you sad? Two weeks is a long time. I won’t get to see you, and I have to check for time zones if I want to talk to you over the phone.”

You held his hand, twining your fingers with his before raising it to plant a kiss on his knuckles. “I will miss you, but you don’t have to be so upset about it. I’ll be right here when you come back. Stop being all dramatic.”

“I’m not!”

“You’re funny.”

He rolled his eyes, but then said, “So, before that, I was planning to take you to meet my best friend and his wife on Saturday. I’ve been telling them about you…”

The rest of his words faded, the only thought registering in your head was how he mentioned his best friend and his wife. You were going to meet them. You couldn’t say no to that given that they seem to play integral parts in his life despite what happened. “Okay.”

“You’re gonna love their little boy,” he said excitedly.

“Sure…”

“But really, Y/N? You won’t have a whirlwind romance with some college brat while I’m away?”

You let go of his hand, stepping back. You didn’t like the sound of that. Not one bit. Not when he was speaking from experience. “What do you take me for?!” The words came out a little harsher than you intended, the resentment you felt for his previous relationship resurfacing.

He arched a brow at you, puzzled at your outburst. “Y/N, I was kidding.”

Not able to hold back anymore, you turned away from him as tears started flooding your vision. You didn’t even know why you were crying over the whole thing, and you just felt like an idiot as you faced him again, frantically drying your tears.

“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” He looked alarmed as he held onto both of your hands, stopping you from wiping harshly at your face. “Why are you crying? Is it because of what I said?”

You shook your head. “No…no. Can I hug you though?” you asked and he almost laughed as he himself drew you closer, wrapping his arms around you. “You never have to ask.”

You did the same, holding onto him tightly, hoping it was enough for you to get rid of any feeling of hurt left in him if there was any to begin with; that it was enough for him to be at ease where you were concerned when he goes away. Still, you wanted to make sure. You stayed like that until you’ve calmed down, thinking you were doing it more for yourself than for him.

“What brought this on?”

“You won’t get mad?” you asked between hiccups, looking up at him.

“Why would I?”

“Promise me first. I just don’t want to hide anything from you and it’s been bothering me.”

“Okay. I promise.” As if to emphasize his words, he pecked you on the tip of your nose. “Now what is bothering you?”

“Since you mentioned your best friend,” you began, “Toji, right?”

He eyed you, nonplussed. “How did you know?”

“Maki told me…” You started tearing up again. “She-she told me w-what happened. Everything…so I know…Please don’t get mad.”

He clucked his tongue. “That woman. Seriously.”

“I’m glad she told me and I’m sorry if I pried, but I can’t…”

“Is that why you’re crying?”

“Y-yes.”

“Why?”

“Because they hurt you.”

His expressions softened. “Silly.”

You pulled him close, wrapping your arms around him. “It’s not silly. Nobody deserves that, least of all you. You’re always so good to me, and I can’t imagine anybody doing that to you, least of all your best friend.”

Sukuna’s hug tightened a tad, placing his chin on top of your head. “No sense crying about it anymore, Y/N. I’ve forgiven and forgotten. It wasn’t their fault if they felt that way when I went away. They found common ground, I guess. Toji thought he was losing his best friend and she felt the same way.”

“Okay.”

“If it isn’t too much to ask, I want you to get to know them, too, just like I want to be close to Satoru, Suguru and Ieiri. They’re important to me.”

“Okay.”

“You mean it?”

“Yes.” You met his gaze. “If they’re important to you, then I will do that for you and meet them.”

He wiped away your tears then. “Thank you.”

“Don’t sweat it,” you mumbled, breathing in deeply. “Sorry you had to see me like this.”

“You don’t have to hide anything from me.” He shrugged then, snickering. “Maki’s timing sure is impeccable.”

And so, Saturday came and you held onto Sukuna’s hand as he helped you out of the Jeep after parking in front of a two-story house with pale yellow walls and white shutters. Before it was a small, well-tended yard surrounded with white picket fences, very much like the house you grew up in under the care of your grandfather. A small, plastic slide and swing set was placed on the grass along with a tiny bike and some toys in the sandbox.

“You okay?” he asked, interrupting your reverie. When you nodded, he said, “You’re not gonna cry, are you?” making you smack him on the arm. “Ow?”

“Serves you right.”

Just then, the door opened revealing this couple you assumed to be the Fushiguros. They looked good together, both with raven hair with their equally dark-haired little boy who looked about eighteen months old, all chubby cheeks and pudgy cuteness.

Toji was this big, hulking man with a vertical scar on the right side of his mouth which oddly added to his charm instead of marring his handsome face. He was carrying his little boy in his muscular arms, taking the edge off his tough looks. He was the first one to approach.

"Hi. Y/N, right?"

"Yes, hi." You shook his hand, smiling genuinely despite your previous notions regarding him and his wife who also stepped forward, taking your hands in hers. She was beautiful, too, and she gave you this feeling of coming home with her bright eyes and kind smile. You couldn’t blame Toji for falling for her, then again, Sukuna used to be in love with her, too.

"You're so pretty!" she said as a way of greeting. "I'm Mirai. It's nice to meet you."

Toji glanced at Sukuna, the gesture injected with meaning. "It's nice to finally meet you. Typically, he's quiet, but he won't shut up about you."

"Shut up," Sukuna muttered.

"It's nice to meet you both." You chuckled. "He isn't quiet around me either." Then your eyes shifted to their kid. You weren't exactly enamored with the idea of children, but you understood what Sukuna meant. "Hi, little angel," you couldn't help but say to the boy who was looking at you with wide, sparkly eyes framed with long lashes. "Your son is lovely."

"Thank you," Mirai returned happily, watching her son reaching for you. "Aww, Megumi likes you."

"Megumi," you repeated. "Blessing?"

"Yes," Toji said proudly and you gathered from his statement that he named the baby.

You looked towards Sukuna as if for assurance as you reached out. "May I hold him?"

"Sure." Toji handed Megumi to you and you followed after them as they led you and Sukuna into their home, marveling at how well-behaved he was, just leaning against your chest and sucking on his thumb, all warm and smelling like baby powder and everything that reminded you of happiness.

The two men went to the living room to catch up while you went to the kitchen with Mirai who was curiously asking you one thing after the other.

"Sukuna told us you're a student. What are you studying?" she asked as she stirred something in a pot.

"Comprehensive literature," you answered, untangling Megumi's hand from your hair.

"Are you sure you're okay carrying Megumi?" Mirai threw you a rueful smile.

You nodded, beaming warmly at the child. "I don't mind. He's so adorable."

Mirai smiled lovingly at her son. "Isn't he? I was so happy when I first had him and saw how much he looked like his dad."

"Yeah, he's like a mini version of Toji. He has your eyes though."

“Thank you.” She grinned. "So, how long have you known Sukuna?"

"Just almost half a year. Around that."

"Guy's whipped for you, Y/N."

"I heard that!" Sukuna called out from the living room. He suddenly entered the kitchen, plucking Megumi off your arms saying, "My turn. How's my favorite boy?"

You just snickered, your thoughts elsewhere. It got you wondering if you would even have met Sukuna if things didn't turn out the way they have. You were picturing Sukuna standing beside Mirai instead of Toji but you just couldn't and it got you contemplating that maybe things ended up the way they did because that's what's meant to be.

As opposed to your resentment to what they did to him, you were now glad, perhaps even thankful and more understanding of Sukuna's reasons for letting things go and remaining friends with them. Because if those things didn't happen, you won't have him. Because if they didn't turn out that way, you wouldn't be watching him being all silly and adorable with Megumi, giving you a picture of what kind of father he would be when he did have kids. Because then, you wouldn't be considering the possibility of a future with anyone…with him.

Then you froze as your feelings for him became clearer. Because why else would you be spending all your time with him, being close to him and getting to know him? Why were you so keen on making sure he was happy? Why were you hurting on his behalf? Why was the world suddenly a better place despite the fact that you're supposedly alone?

It was simple. You're in love with him.

"Y/N?" you heard his deep voice resonating from inside your head then louder as your vision began to focus. He was standing in front of you with Megumi in his arms.

"Huh?"

"You okay? You were spacing out."

"Just thinking." You bit your lower lip, looking apologetic.

"Getting lost in your own world again, I see?" he teased.

"Getting lost in yours is more like it."

He and Miriai looked at you at the same time, the latter giggling pretty much like Ieiri whenever you told her about Sukuna. "You two are so cute."

You brushed the comment off, approaching her. "How can I help?"

You set the table with Toji's help, listening to him talk about Megumi and Mirai with such profound fondness and pride. Just like Sukuna, his appearance was an irony to his funny and soft personality it was disconcerting.

"It's great to have guests over. We rarely do this but Sukuna comes here every Saturday, and well, he isn't a guest anymore," Mirai said as she fed Megumi.

"Thanks for having me then," you replied, still fixated on their kid who was babbling about with his mouth full while he repeatedly knocked a plastic spoon on his high chair.

The conversation was light, circling on their old days, but you knew they were trying to skirt around the ugly things. Mirai regaled you of how Toji got the scar on his mouth. Turns out he and Sukuna were street racers at some point. "Easy cash," as the former had put it. "I mean who wants a part time job if you earn thousands a night?"

"So, what do you plan to become after you graduate?" she asked you again.

"A writer, maybe?"

At that, Sukuna started telling them about your date at the fancy restaurant and how you pretty much nailed the story of the lone old woman who gave you wine. "She's amazing like that," he said fondly, absently patting you on your thigh.

"I'm sure Y/N here finds you impressive, too," Toji teased. "Right, Y/N?"

"Yeah, he smells awfully great it's making my thoughts incoherent," you sallied, "But jokes aside..." You let your voice trail off on purpose, gauging his reaction.

"What?" he prompted.

"That's for me to know," you finally stated, making the couple laugh.

"No fair!"

After lunch, you helped Mirai clean up. Megumi was asleep in his crib after his meal and the guys stood by the backdoor, enjoying some beer. You dried the plates quietly while she washed and told you about Toji.

"It's like raising two kids, really," she told you. "He doesn't pick up after himself and our Megumi is more considerate than he is."

"But you love him," you teased.

"With all that I am." Her eyes strayed to Sukuna then. "Cherish him. Don't let that one get away."

At her words, you felt the same hurt you did when you first learned what the real deal was with them from Maki. You blood boiled out of the blue as thoughts started racing in your head a hundred miles per second. How dare she say that to you when she herself let him go? How dare she hurt him like that and yet keep him as a friend?

The sound of something breaking brought you out of your trance, and you realized the plate you were wiping had fallen onto the floor. But your attention was on her, your steely eyes hard and intense as you said, "You're the last person I expect to be telling me such things."

"I..."

You stepped away from her only to be met by Sukuna's disappointed expression, but you ignored that as well as you turned away. "Excuse me,” you said, bowing slightly as you walked out of the kitchen and into the living room, grabbing your bag before walking out of the house.

The crisp autumn air blew coldly against you, ruffling your hair and your dress as you stood there, not really knowing where to go or what to do. Suddenly, you felt stupid for saying something like that to Mirai when she had been nothing but nice towards you, her and Toji. You also liked their son. And judging by how Sukuna looked at you, you had this niggling feeling that you've ruined it all, eating at you from the inside out.

Just then, the door opened and closed behind you. You didn't have to turn around to know it was Sukuna who followed you out. You've grown so accustomed to his presence that at times, he only had to look at you and you already understand what he wants to convey.

"Y/N, sweetheart, what's going on?" he asked, trying hard to keep the edge off his tone.

You didn't turn to face him, afraid of what you will see. "You heard what I said. Do I really have to explain?"

He walked around you, grabbing you by the shoulders, shaking you slightly. "I thought we're over this. I thought I already explained this to you."

That doesn't cut it, you thought but opted not to say it. He might have told you that he has forgiven and forgotten, and although you weren't involved in it, you still felt displeasure whenever you remembered it. It wasn't as if Mirai and Toji did you wrong, and it wasn't as if you had the right to say shit but she didn't have the right to tell you anything either knowing to herself what she had done. You didn't want to hear anything from her about what you ought to do and decide where Sukuna was concerned. It just didn't sit right with you.

"I know. I'm wrong. I get it," you snapped, shrugging his hands off you. "I wanna go home." You started walking away from him, but you stopped when he said, "What is wrong with you?"

You turned back, breath snagging as you let out a mirthless chuckle. "What is wrong with me?" you repeated, your voice coming out soft but with a bitter edge to it. "I know I am wrong for blurting out the things I did, and I am sorry."

"Y/N –"

"But don't strip me of my right to be angry when Mirai tells me to cherish you and not let you go as if she has any right to do it," you cut him off. "I didn't have the right to call her out on her transgressions to you, but don't tell me I can't cry or be mad at the fact that you had to go through all that because I care too damn much for you!"

Your eyes started to fill with tears as you regarded him, seeing the world come alive with blossoms dancing in the wind while in reality, the world was at its last legs, leaves falling all around you. Whenever you looked at him, you felt like everything was flourishing, filling your existence with beautiful things in an abundance of colors. "I'm so in love with you that I can't bear the thought of you getting hurt. I hate it when I know you're tired but you still smile for me anyway. I hate it when you look disappointed whenever I hesitate and couldn't make up my mind."

"I'm sorry for reacting the way I did. I was being a jerk, but that's how much I love you. I love you, Sukuna, more than I can possibly tell you. I can't pretend I don't."

"Say that again," he murmured.

"What?" you demanded gruffly, too caught up in your emotions to comprehend.

"You said you love me. Say it again." Now he looked like he was about to cry, eyes glistening even as he smiled wide with joy, drawing nearer and taking your hand in his.

You sighed in relief, feeling your chest loosen up. It felt great saying it out loud. Beyond just great. "I love you."

The moment you let go of the words, you were wrapped up in his warmth, his arms tight around you while you listened to the thundering beats of his heart. He held you at arm's length, looked deep into your eyes as he cupped your face and leaned in to claim your lips in a brief kiss. Spring has come in the middle of autumn, filling your senses and making you feel like you could fly. He held you in place, eyes closed as he touched his forehead to yours, letting out a shaky laugh.

"Do you mean that?" He opened his eyes slowly and you were lost in their depths as you nodded. "Yes."

"You haven't asked, but I happen to be just as in love with you if not more."

"I already knew that. How can I not when you show me every day? It's comforting to hear you say it out loud though." You smirked at him. "You know, when you don't think I'm asleep."

He stiffened against you. "You heard that?"

"God, it was so hard to keep my eyes closed and stop myself from reacting when you told me you're in love with me."

He clucked his tongue. "You waited this long to respond to me?"

"I told you I didn't wanna give it to you half-assed. I’m giving you my heart just as I want yours, and if you’re ready to entrust it wholly to me, I can’t just reciprocate with pieces of mine."

“You had it since the first day we met. I didn’t have to see everything else to know you’re the one who owns it.” Sukuna kissed you on the forehead, hugging you to him and just standing there with you, watching cars pass by the road, reveling in his proximity and his warmth. You didn’t need much of anything if you had him.

But then you broke out of his hold, realizing the mess you’ve made.

"What is it?"

"I have to apologize to our hosts. Stay here," you stated, walking back to the house to find the couple in the living room, standing there as if they were expecting you to come back. Without hesitation, you bowed before them. "I sincerely apologize for what I said. I should not have said that to you, Mirai. And it isn't my intention to indirectly hurt you, too, Toji. I'm sorry."

"What is this girl saying?" you heard Mirai say as she approached you and hugged you tight. "You silly girl. We deserve that and we don't deserve Sukuna. Everyone just gave us a free pass, and we were glad you were brave enough to say it to us like that. You have nothing to apologize for."

"Still..."

Toji shook his head. "No, Y/N. Thank you. For loving Sukuna and for giving us the chance to finally forgive ourselves, too."

At that, you smiled, nodding in understanding.

When it was time to leave, Megumi woke up and you had the chance to say goodbye to him, too, holding onto him until you had to get out the door.

"Visit us anytime, Y/N," Mirai said, winking. "Sukuna doesn't have to be with you."

"So, you're throwing me away cause you have Y/N now? Some friends you are," he sniped, causing another round of easy laughter.

"I'll come by soon," you promised, pecking Megumi on the cheek. "See you, angel."

***

"So, you're officially together now?" Suguru asked, helping you pack for the trip to the mountains Sukuna had planned, scheduled immediately after his return.

"Two weeks ago, but he had to go to London," you said, and in the next second, Ieiri and Satoru both brought out their wallets, handing bills to Suguru.

"I knew there was something different when he drove you home that afternoon."

"I can't believe you three are betting over my relationship with Sukuna," you muttered, zipping up your small luggage.

Suguru won fair and square though. He had been right to ask from the start when he walked in on you and Sukuna making out on the porch when the latter dropped you off. The drive then was quiet but you had the shut the guy up for teasing you about that "one hell of a confession," as he had put it. But he immediately took control, shoving you against the wall beside the door and kissing you stupid.

"What did I say about raising her on my own?" Suguru gloated, slinging an arm over your shoulder much to the annoyance of your supposed two other parents.

Satoru scoffed. "I was the one who did the hardest job of interrogating him the first time he came and brought our little girl dead drunk!"

"Yeah, he said you're intimidating," you told him, chuckling, and he positively glowed until you said, "But he said you apologized afterwards so..."

Suguru and Ieiri laughed hard at him.

"On a more serious note, Sukuna isn't gonna be as lucky the moment you get hurt, Y/N," Satoru stated calmly and the other two nodded in agreement. "Just putting it out there."

You would do the same for them, too, so you also agreed. "And if I'm the one causing him shit?"

"That's on him, too," Suguru said, ruffling your hair. "You're our princess, Y/N. It doesn't matter who's right or wrong when the time comes. You'll probably get an earful from us, too, cause we like the guy, but you will always have us first."

You clucked you tongue. "You're all being dramatic, but thanks. Much appreciated."

"It's the first time you're going steady with anyone. We're just making sure we've covered all the bases," Ieiri stated.

"Yeah, and before we forget..." Satoru took something out from under your bed, handing it to you.

You eagerly looked into the bag, thinking it was a present but you wanted to throw it at his face the moment you found out what it was.

"I got the bigger sizes cause Sukuna looks loaded in that department. Special edition, ultra-thin in – wait for it – mixed berry flavor." He winked. "Wrap it before you tap it."

"Ha ha, Satoru. You're really funny." You motioned to hit him, but laughed with him nonetheless as you rummaged through the bag. "Where the hell did you even get these?"

"Ordered them in from Amsterdam. You're welcome, princess."

"You're fucking weird for handing me rubbers, but thanks, dad." You handed the bag back to him. "You're giving them to Sukuna yourself though."

"Fine!"

And that he did when Sukuna arrived to come pick you up, strictly telling the man to open it in private much to the latter's confusion. Still, he accepted graciously.

"Don't open that thing," you said the moment you were in his car.

"That makes me want to open it now," he said.

You clucked you tongue, and shook your head. "Do that when I'm not looking." You tilted your head to have a better look at him, reaching over to make him face you. You frowned at the dark circles under his eyes. "What have you been doing in London?"

"Not sleeping enough is one of them, and I'm jetlagged." He took your hand in his and started planting butterfly kisses on your fingers. "I missed you."

"I missed you, too." You cupped the side of his face and leaned over, pecking him on the lips. "You're going to sleep the moment we get to our destination."

"But –"

"No buts." You took the key off the ignition. "And I'm driving." You got out of the car, rounding it to the driver's side, opening the door. "Scoot."

Sukuna grinned at you. "Is being bossed around what it entails to be your boyfriend, sweetheart?" he asked, swinging his legs towards the door.

You moved closer, standing between his legs. "And if I say yes? Do you want out?" you asked, flashing him a sultry smile as you drew closer to him, your breaths mingling.

"I can't say I don't like it." He kissed you, deeper than the peck you gave him earlier.

"It's safer if I drive," you spoke against his lips. "Move."

"Just this once," he acceded, moving towards the passenger side while you climbed behind the wheel, gunning the car out of the property. But opposite to his words, he was asleep not an hour into the drive.

You never really realized how long two weeks could be until you had to wait for Sukuna to come back safe and sound. Though your time had been occupied by your studies and every other thing you did, you were always distracted by your phone, waiting for his messages and calls that you had to find yet another distraction in the form of a new video game you've gotten over the mail just two days after he left. But that was just momentary as you finished it in three days of continual gaming. You even went to visit the Fushiguros the weekend prior much to Mirai's delight just to have a semblance of familiarity where Sukuna was involved but it just made you miss him more.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder, indeed. You could just laugh at yourself over the past days, thinking yourself selfish at the thought of not wanting him to go anywhere you couldn't easily reach him. But now that he was back, you are back to normal, and you knew you have to come to terms with accepting that it is a part of his job to be away from you every now and then if things are going to work out for the two of you.

You're whipped, and you know it. You've accepted that. Now, it's just a matter of not allowing yourself to become too dependent on his presence.

Sukuna woke up when you stopped for gas three hours later. Why he had to choose such a far off place to bring you to was beyond you, but you weren't complaining in that you'd go wherever he was, but it was more for the fact that he came straight out of the airport and yet he was traveling again and by car, too.

"You okay?" he asked while you munched on gummy bears, standing against the Jeep as you filled it with gas. "We can switch."

"I go on farther road trips with the boys and Ieiri every time we have the chance. Stop worrying about me."

He whined sleepily, his voice coming out thick, trapping you against the car with his body. "You're crabby today. It doesn't feel like you miss me."

"Oi, I had to order a new game just so I won't send stupid texts telling you to come back home. How dare you doubt that?"

He burst out laughing. "So you were nerding out while I was away?"

"Pretty much. Don't run away when one day, you walk into my room and find a monster holding onto my controller in the middle of pizza boxes and a whole lot of other mess. That's me needing to be brought out of my hole."

"Hey, don't do that when I go away for business trips." He looked seriously worried now. "You should do your normal routine."

"So don't say I didn't miss you because I was nearly that monster nerd I was telling you about." You popped a green gummy bear into his mouth. "And I'm still driving."

The drive continued for another two hours with you reaching the foot of the mountain at the side of the highway where you really had to switch with Sukuna since you didn't know the way.

"You didn't bring me here to murder me, did you?" you quipped, seeing how thick the forest was on the one-lane road going up the mountain. It was such green world that you almost wanted the feeling of being lost

"Probably. You're too bossy today."

"Hey, that's me being nice."

"I won't. I have other things in mind to do with you." He grinned mischievously at you, winking to which you just shook your head.

Soon enough, you reached a small, traditional village which was pretty much turned into a hot spring resort. Sukuna stopped at the largest building in the vicinity, telling you to wait in the car as he disembarked, returning very shortly later with a key dangling on his thumb. The drive continued for another twenty minutes until he parked in front of this old-style house which didn't look old at all, located at a much more secluded area of the resort. He handed you the key, telling you to go ahead while he unloads your stuff.

Yup. There was nothing old about the facilities at all with the south-facing side made entirely of glass that looked over the private hot spring and a view of the mountains beyond that. The kitchen was as modern as it could get, and judging by how Sukuna was carrying bag after bag of things into the fridge, he planned to cook during your entire stay there. You took over the job while he carried your luggage into the house. Poor thing did the shopping before coming to pick you up without telling you.

"Go shower and sleep. I can handle it from here," you told him when he entered the kitchen again, muscular arms crossed over his wide chest, eyeing you appreciatively.

Instead of doing as he was told, he came up to you, standing behind you, hands fastening onto your waist as he drew your hair to one side. He nuzzled your neck, slowly making his way up your jawline where he pressed his lips and lingered there for a bit. You smiled, reaching up with your hand to place it on his cheek.

"You need to rest, my love."

"Say that again," he whispered.

"You need to rest?" You teased, feeling him nip at your ear. "My love?"

"You keep annoying me today."

"You keep commenting about how I'm behaving today," you countered, facing him. "Come on, let me boss you around for now. You really need to get some shuteye."

"You'll let me boss you around later then?"

"Deal."

***

"Back already?"

You looked over your shoulder as you combed through your hair when you heard the sliding door open. A smile graced your lips seeing as how Sukuna looked better, more well-rested and more like himself after a long sleep, only coming to at nightfall. He took a dip in the hot spring after dinner and was returning from it.

He came in wearing that dark blue yukata provided by the resort, feeling your face grow hot when you realized you were ogling him yet again. How can you not when the garment hung loosely over his shoulder. He didn't bother tying it properly, and from the partition of the robe, you can see the broad expanse of his chest, the smattering of inked patterns following the sinews of his form.

It wasn't the first time you were seeing his tattoos, the artistic floral and tribal patterns making themselves known to you that day you woke up to him naked from the waist up. However, you did not realize they expanded all the way down the right side of his body, all the way down to the outer area of his thighs. Since he was just wearing a pair of boxers underneath the yukata, when he stepped forward, you were able to see it, and as curiosity won over you, you didn't look away even when he raised a brow at you, the ghost of amusement playing at the corners of his mouth.

You stood up, walking slowly towards him, stopping when you were less than a foot away. Your eyes shifted hesitantly between his face and that area of his anatomy silently asking for his permission to see more of it but your hands refused to move midway.

"What is it?" he asked, not exactly sure as to what you were trying to do.

Biting your lower lip. "M-may I..." You couldn't say it out loud so you pointed at his tattoos, feeling a lump forming on your throat when you realized how bold you were being.

"You don't have to ask," Sukuna whispered, taking your hand and placing it on his chest, warm and alive underneath your palm, while he drew his robe apart, eyes intent on you as you followed the expanse of skin that served as a canvass to the artfully-made representation of the four seasons in a single branch of a cherry blossom tree, meandering downwards. From his chest going down the length of his side, your hand traced over the colored patterns of smaller branches that progressed from summer to winter. Your fingers lingered over his iliac crest where new buds of the familiar pink blossoms that promised spring were immortalized on his skin.

Sukuna's breathing had deepened the moment your hand reached lower, and you relished the fact that you had that effect on him, too. You could feel heat behind your eyes as your blood rushed up to your head at the realization that you could do that to him, and even greater than that, the reality of just how much you wanted this man in front of you, how much you wanted to make him yours in every sense of the word and how much you wanted to be his and his alone.

In the dim light of the moon that was filtered by the mist rising from the springs through the open sliding doors, you looked up at Sukuna, the man you love with every single fiber of your being, leaning your head on his chest, listening to his beating heart that mirrored the thrumming in your chest.

You brushed your lips onto his bare skin, trailing kisses across his chest before looking up at him and letting yourself be devoured by those deep, hooded eyes as you stepped even closer.

"You're beautiful," you breathed out, pulling him down towards you, tears pooling in your eyes when he finally kissed you, taking your breath away.

Sukuna's large hands roamed your body as he continued to mold your mouth against his, his tongue pushing between your lips which you welcomed with your own, loving his taste, hot and wet and stirring you alive. His hands were warm and nimble as he kneaded the flesh of your hip through the fabric of your kimono, traveling lower to where the garment parted so he can slide his hand underneath. They made their way to your ass, squeezing hard before he slid lower, hooking both of his hands under your thighs. He lifted you up, urgently maneuvering your legs to wrap around his waist.

Neither of you came up for air even as he walked deeper into the room where the bed was, pawing and hungrily devouring each other, what began as a gentle kiss turning into a scorching show of dominance as you both took from each other, not quite getting enough.

"I love you," he rasped, breathless as he nipped at the shell of your ear. "I want all of you."

He then continued kissing you, seizing you at the back of your neck, roughly nibbling on your lips then progressing towards the columns of your throat, spreading the V that formed the collar of your robe. You ran your fingers through his hair, intoxicated by his scent, your toes curling as his hands travelled to outline the sides of your body possessively.

Sukuna then returned to your lips after leaving open-mouthed kisses all over your chest and collar bones, and you kissed him back just as fervently as he pressed you down against his clothed crotch, making you shiver as you felt stirrings at the pit of your stomach. You gasped at the feeling of him poking against your thigh but before you could recover, he entered his hot tongue into your mouth again, gently luring yours to mingle with his. You just let him have his way, not quite believing what was happening as you felt your skin bursting into flames wherever he touched you.

Sukuna lifted you slightly off the bed, putting you down so that you were facing away from him. From behind, he guided you towards the pillows and snaked his hands around your waist, reaching for the sash of your robe and tugging on it. When he was successful, he tossed it somewhere on the floor and reached over your shoulders, slowly feeling for the lapels of the robe, making sure his fingers brushed against your skin, sending jolts of electricity all over your body as he peeled the garment off you in deliberate and calculated slowness, coupled with his mouth following the train down your nape to your shoulders before he pushed you face down on the bed.

"Oh god," you whispered, fighting for air as he gathered your hair to your left shoulder and licked the shell of your ear. "What are you thinking about? You're too stiff. Relax," he said in that deep, sensual voice that turned your legs to jelly.

You grabbed onto the pillow, anticipating what he was gonna do next when you felt his febrile tongue making a trail on your right shoulder, the action morphing into sloppy, wet kisses going down your bare back until you could not feel your robe anywhere near your body anymore. He has already undressed you.

You were on edge and just hyper aware of everything he was doing and every single touch he left on your body made you feel like it was leaving a mark and being absorbed by every cell in your system. It felt good being this close to him, being touched by him and you wouldn’t really mind if he marked you everywhere. You wanted to be his and you wanted the world to know.

His hands travelled everywhere it could touch, pushing you to the edge and making you feel like you were burning slowly, the kind that made every corner of your body tingle with anticipation. What you didn't realize was how tight you were holding the pillow to yourself until he suddenly mentioned it.

"Y/N?"

"Hmm?" Your voice came out at a higher pitch, making you want to smack yourself. This was that you wanted and yet you were being all jittery.

He chuckled softly, stopping his ministrations. "What are you doing?"

At that, you pushed yourself off the bed a bit and turned your head sideways to meet his gaze from over your shoulder. “Sorry, I’m just…”

“Yes?”

“Overwhelmed,” you whispered, chuckling slightly. While it wasn’t your first time, everything felt new with the added sensations that your deep emotions for him were throwing into the mix. “How do you want me?”

He turned you over on your back, chuckling. "For starters, cut out the pillow hugging." He pried the thing off your arms and chucked it against the headboard. Sukuna then hovered over you, pinning your hands on either side of your head then began his assault on your neck going lower and lower until he reached your left breast and started licking and tugging on your nipple, his other hand busy kneading the other.

“You are beautiful,” he said, mouth moving against the swell of your flesh while his other hand took possession of the other hand, tentatively squeezing with his long fingers.

You let out a moan, craving for more but not certain whether you could take it or not with your heart feeling like it was going to burst out of your chest. You wanted him to touch you more and as if he read your mind, he returned to kissing you intensely until you thought you couldn't breathe, well aware of how his other hand was taking off your panties. Your heart was beating erratically in your chest as you anticipated the moment, but halfway down your thighs, he raised himself a bit and laid himself on top of you, burying his face into your hair.

“Are you sure you want this?” he asked cautiously as he raised himself slightly, looking into the depths of your eyes as if he was looking right through you.

Cupping his face, you rose slightly on your elbows, pressing your lips at the corner of his mouth. "A hundred times yes. I'm yours," you said with all the conviction you could muster in your hazy state – love drunk, kiss drunk, Sukuna drunk.

At your response, he latched his lips onto the skin of your neck, kissing lower and lower, passing over your breasts where he lingered, biting and sucking gently. You hissed as you watched him progress downward, his mouth doing all the magic from the valley of your chest down to your stomach, his hand reaching for the garment he had taken off you halfway down your legs, discarding it. The rough pads of his hands brushed over your thighs, pushing them apart as he lowered himself between them.

You let out a sharp cry when he licked a long stripe on your nether lips, his hot tongue swirling over your sensitive nub. He hummed in approval upon tasting you while he teased your folds with two of his digits. Without a warning he simultaneously pushed his fingers into you and sucked on your clit, building a rhythm that had you seeing stars with every thrust, coaxing out whimpers from your slightly parted lips. Your hips bucked towards him when you felt him reaching deep enough to touch your sweet spot again and again.

Sukuna anchored his arms around your thighs, his elbows on the mattress as he held you steady, continuing to lap at you and move his digits inside you as you felt that familiar sensation of coming undone, guiding you through it until you released so hard your juices squirted out despite his fingers still inserted in you, making a right mess of his mouth, chin and hand.

You spasmed against him but he didn't let go, continuing with his ministrations. He removed his fingers from inside you and started eating you out like a starved man, catching all of your essence from your initial orgasm and cajoling you into another one as he shoved his tongue right into you.

Your hand reached down, fingers tangling with his cherry blossom locks, not knowing whether you want to push him or keep him right where he was. He moaned as he felt your walls clenching, the vibrations caused by his voice stimulating you further, and in no time, you were releasing into his mouth again, your high hitting you like a speeding truck, slamming onto you and leaving you a shaking mess.

Your chest heaved up and down as you tried to calm down, chuckling in between each intake of breath when you felt Sukuna planting ephemeral kisses on your feverish skin, working his way up this time, worshipping your body before catching your lips in his where you tasted yourself on him.

"Can I eat you forever?" he asked with a groan. "You taste exquisite, my love."

"Alright," you panted, "But before that..." You looked him in the eye, running your hand down his chiseled abs until you reached the band of his boxers, excitement filling you as you palmed his crotch over the fabric. You snickered when his whole body seized on top of you, but you were just as out of breath feeling how massive and warm he was against your palm. You bit your lip as your hand moved, rubbing him slowly. Sukuna's eyes drooped a little as he drank in the clouded look in your eyes.

Satoru wasn't wrong about the condoms, and it further got proven to you when you pushed Sukuna’s underwear down and he rose up to his knees, finishing the job. You swore your eyes were going to pop out of their sockets when his length was released from its restraints, slapping against his stomach, thick, long and standing proud, its pink tip leaking precum that dripped down, following a prominent vein on its underside. You never wanted to put anything in your mouth as much as you wanted his dick, but the idea of it stretching you and ripping you apart from between your legs was more intriguing.

Sukuna smirked down at you. "Like what you see, sweetheart?"

"That's an understatement." You swallowed hard, taking you herculean effort to look at his face instead. "I don't just wanna look at it though."

He reached over to the nightstand, taking out that familiar bag from Satoru, quickly rummaging through it. "I'd be insulted if that's all you wanna do." He said as he took out a packet, about to rip it but you shook your head, taking it away from him.

He arched a brow at you. "You don't...Are you –"

"Stop asking me if I'm sure. I'm certain as I'll ever be." You smiled at him. "Or maybe I'll change my mind if you keep asking."

Laughing, he bent down, positioning himself between your legs as he took possession of your lips once more. You took a deep breath when you felt his tip nudging between your folds, teasing you while he busied himself with tracing the topography of your body as if committing it to memory.

Watching him now, you wished you've met him earlier in your life, loved him longer than you have at present. If you knew someone like Sukuna would come to care for you as much as he does, even in acts that are mostly governed by sheer instinct and senses, driven by need and lust, you would have combed the earth to find him. He cares so damn much for you that you knew he will find it in him to stop if you just said so even at his own expense.

"Sukuna..." his name spilled from your mouth, wanting him all for yourself, body, heart and soul. "Baby, please..." You were pleading, but for what, you didn't know exactly.

"Yes, my love?" he questioned, a smug grin playing at the corners of his mouth as he watched the mess that you are beneath him. "Tell me what you want."

"You," you whimpered, raising your hip to meet his cock, hard and burning on your skin. "I want you," you breathed out, the delicious torture in your voice coming to a crescendo when he thrust in agonizingly slow, making your wish his command.

He stretched you, gradually, gently as if he was afraid to break you, but your breath hitched for a different reason entirely. His girth left a slight burn as he pushed in, the rapturous feel of him invading your space and being wrapped in your flesh making a heated mess out of you as you grabbed everything you can get a grip on – the sheets, his shoulders, the pillow nearest to you – trying to anchor yourself from the sudden high of knowing he was inside you.

Your eyes watered at the sheer thought of being connected to him so deeply, and you found yourself falling to blissful surrender when he finally bottomed out. You felt him twitch inside you, but instead of moving as he wished, he cupped your face, delicately brushing his fingers over your flushed cheeks. He had that look of disquiet as he examined your expressions.

"You okay?"

You nodded, beaming in your state of stupor. "Please…move."

Sukuna begins to do as he was told, sliding in and out and acquainting you to his rhythm, his intense eyes hooded yet intense as he regarded you, aware of every nuance of your expressions with every single thrust. He started picking up the pace when he felt you wrap your legs around him, hitting you deeper every single time.

Pleasurable groans elicited from Sukuna's lips as he held himself up, driving his hips against yours repeatedly. "You're so tight," he rasped, his snagged breaths hot on your ears. "You feel so good."

"So good," you repeated, completely going out of it when the mere brushing of his rod against your walls drove you over the edge. You clenched tight around him and he let out a groan, eyes rounding when he realized you were close.

"Let go, baby. Cum for me," he said between pants as he pounded onto you unrelentingly.

You spoke broken syllables of his name as you came around him, riding you through your high. Acid white flashes started to flash behind your eyelids, your back arching from the bed as you keened loudly, too enraptured and absorbed in the pleasure that he was giving you.

However, before you could even recover, Sukuna lifted you off the bed, holding you against him so that your breast were rubbing against his taut chest. You wrapped your arms around him, gripping onto his shoulders while you sat astride him on your knees.

"You'll give me one more, won't you, my love?" he said, thrusting up to you whilst he gripped your waist so tight you knew you will have bruises after, making you meet every single push of his thick length.

Both your moans filled the room along with skin hitting skin, the friction between you two kept at bay by the sheen of sweat that covered your bodies. He held onto the back of your neck, roughly kissing you, your tongues dancing the lovers' minuet. Your lungs begged for air, but you were reluctant to be released from Sukuna's wild kisses while he fucked you senseless.

"Fuck," he growled through gritted teeth. "I love you," he whispered repeatedly like a mantra.

You felt him getting harder inside you as he hastened his pace, ramming into you faster and stronger, and in no time, you were screaming out his name as you came undone again with him following shortly after you did, a deep groan falling out of his mouth in a dragged out note when he spilled his seed inside of you, making you feel even fuller, your walls throbbing around his softening length.

Spent, you both fell back on the welcoming softness of the mattress with him still inside you. He landed on top of you, catching his breath while he rested his head on the crook of your neck while you wrapped your arm around him, your fingers carding through his damp locks.

“You’re amazing, Y/N,” he purred in hushed tones once he caught your breath.

Your brows furrowed in perplexity. “I didn’t do anything.”

He shook his head, pulling out and rolling away, his eyes between your thighs, watching as your mixed juices dripped down on the sheets. “I’m not just talking about your body and how you felt. That in itself is amazing, but I’m referring to everything that you are.”

You felt heat creeping up your neck, all the way to your scalp. Abashed, you covered your face with your hands. “Don’t say things like that. You’re making me a shy mess. Geez.”

“Hey, look at me.” He clucked his tongue when you didn’t move, taking your hands off of your face. When you finally did as you were told, he said, “I mean it. Sometimes, I can’t believe you’re real.”

“I should be saying that. You’re so kind to me, and I feel how much you care for me every single time you say or do something. And I’m just selfish, really.”

“No, you’re not?”

“I am, Sukuna. I want you all to myself from that time you first kissed me, but I didn’t really do much to make that happen because I’m also a wimp, so thank you for going the extra mile for me.” You smiled slightly, feeling your eyes fill with tears.

“Stop saying that.”

“But it’s true. You’re always the one putting in the effort.”

“Because I want to.” He suddenly sat up, pulling you by the arm to lift you up when you gasped, feeling a sudden jolt of pain at the base of your back and the joints on your thighs at your sudden movement. “What’s wrong?” he asked, alarmed.

You raised a finger, moving on the mattress on your own while you held onto his arm for support. “Give me a moment.”

Sukuna regarded you with wide eyes. “Did I hurt you?” He sat beside you, wrapping arm around your shoulder and soothingly rubbing your arm. “Are you aching anywhere?”

“A bit, but it’s the good kind.” You smirked at him. “You’re amazing,” you said, imitating his tone earlier when he said you’re beautiful, your eyes traveling to his crotch. “You wrecked me, my love.”

He didn’t know whether to laugh or be upset. “You say the most outrageous things and it doesn’t help that you don’t hold back either.”

“Too shocking?” you offered.

“Scandalous!” he quipped, chuckling and you joined in on the laughter, the merry sound breaking through the stillness. “Can I carry you now?”

“Sure.” You lifted your arms, latching onto his neck, letting him take you to the bathroom.

“Let’s wash up and take a dip.”

You nodded and let him have his way around you, standing on the shower stall with him as he did everything while you just held onto him, your legs still wobbly. He kissed you on the cheek, the action soft and delicate, filling you with happiness. You can’t believe he is real.

“I’m sorry if I hurt you,” he spoke against your skin.

You pulled away from him, placing your hand on either side of his face, and with a triumphant smile, you said, “I’m not. Never will be.”

“I love you.”

“I love you more. Don’t argue.” You pecked him on the lips.

Sukuna beamed at you toothily. “Alright, sweetheart.”

He carried you out of the bath and out of the sliding doors that led to the hot spring, setting you down into the water carefully as if you’d break if he didn’t take caution. The hot water felt glorious on your skin, immediately melting the knots of your muscles as you sat between his legs, both of you submerged chest-deep.

“Damn, that feels good,” you sighed, mollified as you leaned against Sukuna’s broad chest, closing your eyes in bliss. “I can stay here forever.”

“Are you talking about the hot spring?”

“Yes and no,” you said without hesitation. “The water feels nice, but it wouldn’t be complete without you holding me.”

“You’re being sweet now after bossing me around earlier?” He wrapped his arms around you, placing his chin on your shoulder. “We can always come here when we both have free time. And I’ll always hold you like this.”

“I like that.”

“I love you,” he mumbled, nuzzling on the spot below your ear and breathing in deeply. “You smell divine.”

“I know. I smell like you.”

“Thank heavens then cause that’s what seemed to lure you to me,” he kidded.

You just smiled, reaching blindly to place your palm on his cheek, trying to get a semblance of reality although it was already staring you in the face, the emotions and sensations he has making you feel very much real, but you seem to be in a dream state, unable to come to terms with the fact that spring has finally come for you in the person of the man whose arms held you tight and close to his heart.

“Sukuna…”

“Yes, my love?”

“Thanks for existing."

-THE END-

So, I made Megumi's mom's name here "Miriai." I made her an OC because I can't just keep referring to her as "she/her." It's quite confusing. I hope this doesn't bother anyone. I cringed, too, trust me.

Okay, Toji is also OOC here. Haha! I went all the way with conjuring these characteristics and since Sukuna, my love, is super soft here (he has cherry blossom tats XD), why not Toji, too?

Anyway, I would like to say thank you to everyone who read this fic! Stay tuned for more. Love you guys :)

Additional notes are available in the masterlist, particularly on the reasons why I wrote some things the way I did.

Thank you so much for reading. Likes, comments and reblogs are deeply appreciated! Hope you enjoyed it.

© ORIGINAL WORK BY nanaminokanojo. CHARACTERS ARE INSPIRED BY GEGE AKUTAMI'S JUJUTSU KAISEN. [20210630]

PHOTO/IMAGE/GIF/FANART SOURCES FULLY CREDITED TO THE RESPECTIVE OWNERS.

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Can we take a moment to talk about what a tragic character Minerva is? Y’all know that for the longest time I haven’t been the biggest fan of her, and honestly I’m still not? but I think I might’ve had a breakthrough on why that is. 

Whenever I’ve asked around to see why people find her so appealing or why they consider her their favorite, I’ll get answers like, “she’s such a complex character and she deserved a redemption arc!” or “she should’ve come back to the school with us! Let Minnie be happy, you cowards! Telltale did her dirty! I could write paragraph after paragraph about her!” all sorts of things along those lines… but like, no one seems to want to actually talk about her. I find that interesting? Since when I do follow up with a “care to explain further?” I get nothing. Radio static. Like…. no, talk to me please, I just wanna understand-

Minerva within the context of TFS is such a tragedy. She grew up in a school for troubled youth where all the adults left them for death at the start of the breakout, they had walkers trying to eat the living all around them, and I’m sure she saw her fair share of traumatic violence and despair… but on the bright side, she always had her twin sister, Sophie, and little brother, Tenn. She had her friend and eventual girlfriend, Violet. She had music, and a dorm full of pretty paintings done by Sophie. She and Louis composed a song together to make everyone feel better. There are worse places to live than the school. 

Then one day she got traded away to a bunch of raiders against her will, having no idea what the hell these people were gonna do to her and Sophie. They were made to be soldiers to fight in a war that had nothing to do with them. The delta fucking broke her. If we’re to believe Lilly’s story about the twins, they started their brainwashing process early on when Sophie was still alive, and it seems like Minerva was easier to control as Sophie was still planning a way out and causing trouble. Then, when Sophie convinced her to steal a boat and get the hell out, they got caught and the delta forced her to murder her own twin sister. 

Like…. I’m sorry, not only did Minerva kill her own sister, but she was made to believe that was the right thing to do? That line she says about how she had to prove her loyalty to the place she calls home? That shit’s ingrained in her brain, you can tell that isn’t the first time she’s heard or said that very thing. That is what made her family to the delta. Delta is her home now, her family. Sophie was just a thing that needed to be dealt with. You keep your head down, do as you’re told, and you survive.  You survive and you get to go home, eat a hot meal, take a shower, and be with your delta family.  If not, you end up like Sophie.

What’s also fucked is that Minerva actually cares about these people now. Think about that. After everything they did to her and made her do, she’s been trained to see them as her family and obey. When you save Louis and he kills Dorian, Minerva actually cries out and is visibly hurt by her death. When she’s with the other raiders on land, she's screaming at walkers to get away from them. She cares about the people who made her kill Sophie… and no one ever talks about that??

She fucking hates Clementine. Clementine is just another thing in Minnie’s way. I know the part of the fandom likes to ship these two together and they think it’s hot when they fight and shit, but within the canon text, Minerva wants Clementine gone. Dead. She is the thing stopping her from having her old family merge with her new family. If Clementine hadn’t made them fight, they all would’ve been captured and they’d all be a delta family now. She would’ve had Tenn back. 

Clementine is the problem, she made everyone fight back and that’s why people are dead. Minerva hates her for it… it’s not a “I hate you but like the sexual tension, y’know?” that I see people pretend it is, it’s “you are ruining everything and if I have to, I will kill you myself and I won’t give a second thought about it when they toss your body overboard.”

Like….. seriously, think about how fucked up all of this is. Minerva is a husk of who she was before she was taken away. Sure, you do have to keep in mind that when Tenn and Violet are describing her, their sights are a bit clouded, y’know? But I do believe that she was someone who was kind and cared about people, she wanted to make people feel safe and comforted. 

Now she’s a brainwashed soldier who won’t help the people she used to call friends when they’re about to get limbs cut off. She won’t hesitate to knock someone unconscious or threaten a child.  She’s willing to trick them into being captured with no regard for what’s going to happen to them. … all she knows is this was the mission, and now they all get to be together again back at the delta. 

Then when she finds out there’s a bomb on the boat, she ditches Violet to blow up with it in order to make it to land herself. She loses her shit seeing everyone die and gets her face chewed off by a walker… and then she tries to blow Clementine and AJ up with a grenade. 

Oh, and who can forget the fact that she tracks the group down with plans of murdering Tenn so that they can go to a better place together? And she’ll take down anyone who gets in her way?

Like….. jesus christ, Minerva’s waaaaay too far gone. It’s awful. 

I think that’s what stumps me about why she’s so loved in the way that she is. It’s not that I don’t understand why she’s complex and well-written, I get that perfectly fine. She’s a compelling character study when you comb over all her scenes and take different factors into account.

What I don’t understand is why we tend to just throw everything interesting about her away? For what? 

These days, I never see anyone talking about any of this unless they’re insisting she deserved a redemption arc which…. Eh, I’ll touch on this later. What I mostly see here and mostly other platforms is how great it would be if she and Clementine made out, or hey what if she and Violet got back together if she did come back to the school? Or they just….the best term I have for this is “uwu-ify.” As in she’s reduced to a caricature of a tall, pretty, mean, white lesbian who has “good damage.” 

People insist that Telltale are cowards or bastards because their predictions of her turning on the delta to save Clem and crew didn’t happen. Instead, Minerva ends up being the final baddie you gotta get away from, and she ends up taking someone down with her. But did you really expect to just do a 180 and suddenly decide being brainwashed for over a year was lame and Clementine and friends are cool? Gonna help them out and be with Tenn again? Sure, there’s some left over trauma but love conquers and fixes everything, right?

Uh…. no? That’s not how people work? Honestly, if we entertain the idea that Minerva wasn’t bit and somehow didn’t murder Clementine when they all got back to the school…. romance is the last thing she is ever gonna think of??

I think that’s what bothers me most when reading these au’s and rants about redemption and the entire idea of clemerva as a whole. It’s the same thing that I see happen with Violet- Minerva only has value to fans if she’s in a wlw relationship. By herself, she doesn’t matter. They don’t care about her canon story, they don’t care about Sophie, they don’t care about discussing what could’ve happened if she and Tenn reunited under better circumstances or had a healing recovery together. But why?

Throwing a girlfriend at her isn’t some band aid that’s gonna cover up all the bad she went through?? Having an enemies to lovers romance with Clementine isn’t going to fix a years worth of brainwashing, trauma or the fact that she murdered her own sister and the delta told her she's proved her worth to them?? 

Having the support of those around her is a good thing, don’t get me wrong. The idea of the Ericson crew as a whole trying to help her out and do the best they can to accommodate her is bittersweet since there’s only so much they can do. They’re not trained therapists, which is what Minerva would need and plenty of years ahead of her to work through and come to terms with everything that happened as well as taking steps forward. I’m not saying that she shouldn’t have friends or that she couldn’t have a healthy romantic relationship someday... but that isn’t the solution, y’know? 

I don’t know how else to explain this, but it makes me feel weird that all of this stuff is flat out overlooked or doesn’t appear to matter to fans of her. 

Look, I get it. We all want these characters to be happy. AU’s are a thing, after all. Sometimes we want to forget about the bad things and focus on the good that bring us comfort. You wanna gush about the idea of an AU where the twins never got traded, the raiders didn’t exist, and Clementine got to meet them the way they were before? I feel that, AU’s are super comforting and fun to explore, and my point isn’t to try and shame anyone who has an AU you like this. 

Hell, you think I don’t have days where I pretend mute Louis isn’t a thing because the whole concept of Louis having his tongue cut out of his mouth breaks my fucking heart? No, lot’s of days I just want to forget everything about that route, I want to set aside all the bad and just intake as much clouis fluff as I can get…. But that doesn’t mean I always ignore or refuse to acknowledge the bad just because I don’t like it. I fucking hate the fact that Louis loses his tongue when you don’t save him, but guess what? That’s a canon route you can play, just like any other route, and the possibilities that come with a mute Louis are vast and compelling. 

This is how it is for me… my favorite characters are my favorite for a reason, and I take all the bad with the good. Louis isn’t perfect, and I don’t want him to be. I was to dive into his backstory about why did that to his parents, I like to talk about what he went through with Marlon’s murder and his feelings about AJ and Clementine at the point, I like to view his love of music as bittersweet. He can stand on his own, and while he is a love interest for Clementine, that isn’t his only purpose. 

I know everyone’s different, they express their love for characters in their own ways, but I do have a genuine question: do you guys actually like Minerva?

Believe it or not, I’m not trying to step on toes or make everyone feel defensive which I know is how people will react to this. “You’re just saying all of this to make us feel bad for shipping clemerva! You don’t even like Minnie so you don’t get to say shit!” yeah yeah, I hear you and look, it’s true that she’s not my favorite character. I know I’ve said I hate her in the past but upon reflection and throwing out fandom interpretations.... I don’t hate her. I get it now. She’s a great character study to dissect and analyze and I think she deserves more than what the writers and the fandom have given her. 

And yeah, what I do hate is clemerva, and I’ve explained why. It’s not for me, it makes me uncomfortable, but at the end of the day, who cares? Me not liking it doesn’t mean anything to those who create AU’s for them. They have their reasons, they can do as they please as long as they’re not hurting anyone. I’m just here pointing out things I see and things that bother me in hopes of starting a discussion.

There’s my ramble about Minerva. I’m gonna go make some tea now. 

[frostedfaves]

Repercussions (11)

Masterlist

Pairing: dark!Natasha Romanoff x dark!Wanda Maximoff x fem!reader

Summary: Your plan moves along perfectly, and your girlfriends give you something to remember them by while they’re gone.

Warnings: dark themes, more manipulation from reader, mental health and self harm mentions, implied shower sex, smut 18+ ONLY (oral, face riding, fingering, sex toy penetration, squirting, choking)

A/N: I truly hope this was worth waiting all week for lmao. I planned on ending this with the introduction of a new character 👀 but by the time I got to where I stopped now, I was at 2.3k words (1200 of it that somewhat rough smut most of you voted for) and I decided to save it for 12! anyway, can’t wait to hear your thoughts! 

Previous part

-

The feeling of Natasha and Wanda’s arms around you was gone by morning, as it usually was, which means you knew exactly where to find them. You took the time to wash your face and brush your teeth before heading downstairs, greeting the two with the smallest smile you could manage as you approached the kitchen.

“Good morning, printsessa!” Wanda greeted you with normally bright eyes grown tired. “How do you feel today?”

“I’m alright,” you answered softly as she took your hand in hers, rubbing the back of it.

“What would you like for breakfast?”

“Surprise me,” you told Natasha as you pulled away from Wanda and approached a cabinet.

You opened one of the drawers and searched for a notebook and pen, grabbing both items and taking a seat at the breakfast bar. You could feel their gazes burning through the thin fabric that covered your back, but you continued to ignore them as your hand raced across the page with the pen.

“What are you writing, baby?” Natasha questioned gently as her arm wrapped around your waist.

“A letter.” You kept writing as you heard Wanda join you on the other side of the bar, eyes widening and hands shooting out defensively when she took the notebook away. “Wanda, give it back!”

She lowered it slowly as her eyes shifted back to you. “Who is Wesley?”

“He’s my cousin,” you replied just above a whisper, tears filling your eyes as they avoided hers. “It’s almost his birthday and with everything going on with my mental state, I really miss him. He was the only one growing up that knew how to keep me from spiraling, which is why it made perfect sense that he became a psychiatrist. I thought writing to him would help me feel better, but I don’t know. Just forget it.”

You pushed Natasha’s arm away as you jumped down from the stool, storming off to your separate bedroom to take a shower. The door opened a few minutes after you got in, and Wanda took the towel and soap from you, massaging the suds against your skin in soothing circles.

“I’m sorry, printsessa.” Her voice was just barely heard over the water.

“For what?”

“I didn’t mean to make you feel insecure. I think it’s great that you were writing to him. In fact, Tash and I were thinking that maybe we could invite him to stay with you while we go on our mission--”

“Really?!” You spun around so fast that she had to keep you from slipping. “You’re not messing with me, are you? I don’t think I could handle that.”

“No pretty baby, I’m not. Of course, there would be some rules we have to talk about, but--”

“Thank you, thank you!” You threw your arms around her torso, giggles escaping the two of you as you accidentally covered her in soap suds before pulling away with a frown. “Wait, you both have a mission?”

“I know, it sucks.” She sighed as she reached behind you to grab the showerhead, maneuvering it to rinse you off. “But the team needs both of us and it’s important, so we couldn’t turn it down. We’ll only be gone a week.”

“That’s so long,” you pouted as you watched her rinse herself off as well.

“It’ll be over before you know it! Now...” She pushed you against the shower wall as she turned off the water, kneeling and throwing your leg over her shoulder with a smirk. “Let me get your mind off it for a moment.”

-

“Okay, printsessa.”

You pulled yourself away from your show as Natasha and Wanda sat on the coffee table in front of you, their expressions stern but their eyes still soft. Wanda leaned forward to hand you a sheet of paper, which you glanced over as Natasha held up a copy of their own.

“I know that you’re excited about Wesley coming, but we still need to make sure you behave.”

You took note of some of the rules: no leaving the house, answer every phone call, as well as a few sexual restrictions. When you got to the bottom of the page, you looked up again with a grin. “I can follow these easily.”

“Well, I would hope so,” Natasha challenged with a smirk. “We’re putting a lot of trust in you this upcoming week, and it can very easily be ruined.”

“I’ll be good, I promise.” You dropped the paper beside you and leaned forward to grab their hands with your best puppy-eyed expression. “I just wish I could be good and have you closer than a fifteen hour flight away.”

“I know, baby,” Wanda pouted as she sat beside you on the couch, wrapping her arms around you. “If it was safe enough to do so, you’d be coming right along with us. I’m going to miss touching you.”

Wanda’s hand traveled underneath your oversized hoodie, and Natasha bit her lip when she noticed your thighs clench together in reaction to her wandering fingers. “You know, we could give our pretty baby something to remember us by while we’re gone. Remind her who fucks her properly.”

You nodded your head eagerly and Natasha jumped forward to grab the waistband of your leggings and yank the fabric past your ankles as Wanda’s hands massaged your breasts over your bra. She pulled away and had just pulled your hoodie over your head when Natasha stopped her. 

“Let’s take this to our special room.” She kissed your knuckles sweetly as she looked into your wide eyes. “Don’t worry, it’s not just for punishment.”

She grabbed your wrist and pulled you to your feet, forcing you to keep up with her as she jogged upstairs and down the hall, Wanda hot on your tail. The door was quickly unlocked and thrown open, and you were pushed onto the bed while your girlfriends stripped down as fast as their hands would move. Natasha turned you on your back and smacked your ass lightly before pulling your underwear away, while Wanda took care of your bra.

You turned back over when both of them pulled away, whining a bit when you noticed them kissing as they stood at the end of the bed, and you sat up and scooted a bit closer to the headboard. They separated with a few giggles and Wanda pushed you down onto the mattress harshly by your shoulder, climbing onto the bed with a leg on either side of your head as she lowered herself onto your mouth.

“Fuck, just like that,” she moaned as you began enthusiastically licking along her folds, pressing your hands into the pillows and lacing her fingers through yours. You squeezed them and jolted your hips upward when you felt Natasha’s tongue making its way toward your clit, her hands wrapped firmly around your thighs to keep you from moving again.

The room was filled with Wanda’s moans and suddenly your own when you pulled away for air, gasping as you felt yourself getting closer to the edge. You groaned loudly as you climaxed, shuddering and squirming when Natasha kept going as you came down, and Wanda was quick to push your head back into place.

“She doesn’t stop until I cum, printsessa.”

You tried your hardest to keep a consistent pace against Wanda’s core, occasionally sucking on her clit and working faster when you felt yourself about to cum again. You were just about to fall over the edge when Wanda started moaning and panting loudly, gripping your hands tightly and slumping forward as she came all over your lips and cheeks. Your own break followed soon after, and she twitched against you as the vibration of your satisfied sounds traveled to her clit.

You took a moment to breathe as she got off the bed, giggling a bit as Natasha moved up to clean your face with her tongue before pushing it into your own mouth. She then moved aside and instructed you to flip over, taking your place against the pillows when Wanda grabbed your ankles and pulled you further down. Her hands grabbed your hips and guided you upward onto your knees after positioning herself behind you, and you let out a gasp that turned into a shaky moan as she pushed a ribbed dildo inside of you slowly. Natasha’s fingers pressed into the back of your neck and pulled you right into her slick folds, grinding her hips upward and humming happily as you got to work right away.

Wanda dug her nails into your skin as she began a steady pace, letting you get a feel for the length before suddenly pounding into you relentlessly. You gripped the sheets on either side of Natasha’s waist hard as you pulled away to wail loudly at the delicious feeling, crying out when a hand slapped your ass hard.

“Did I say you could stop, printsessa?” Natasha teased over your aggressive moans, using the free hand that wasn’t holding your neck to rub one of her nipples, enjoying the fact that you were already ruined and they weren’t even close to done.

You squealed out a “no” as best as you could, dipping your head back down and Natasha’s back arched at the vibrations of your loud moans against her clit. You licked and sucked to the best of your restrained ability while Wanda fucked into you hard, occasionally delivering smacks to your stinging cheeks. You’d cum twice by the time Natasha came once, and you fought back tears when she didn’t let you pull away, instead switching hands to give her other nipple attention.

“Fingers too,” she instructed you shakily, a harsh moan escaping her clenched jaw when you pushed two fingers into her at once. “Damn, baby. You really know how to treat a woman.”

You were shaking from a third orgasm as you curled your fingers against the spot that had her screaming out, breathing a sigh of relief when she finally pushed you away. You leaned against her tiredly as she sucked your fingers clean and Wanda slowly pulled out of you. Natasha got up again and you fell into the empty space she left, whimpering as Wanda turned you on your back again.

“Taste it.”

Wanda held your jaw as you lifted your head to lick the soaked dildo, which blocked the view of Natasha walking toward the bed wearing a different one. You felt the bed dip as she climbed on again, your back arching off the mattress and hands gripping the sheets again when she pushed into you.

“Come on, baby, you can take it.”

Wanda moved away as Natasha slammed her hips against yours, pulling away and slamming into you again as your mouth fell open with silent moans. You found your voice again when she pulled out halfway, dipping her hand between the two of you to rub your clit with her thumb, and you groaned when your hips jerked forward at the movement and effectively pushed the toy further into you.

“If you wanted me to fuck you that badly, you should’ve asked.”

She spread your legs further apart and leaned forward to thrust into you faster, placing her hands on either side of you and chuckling when you reached up to dig your fingers into her biceps to anchor yourself. One of her hands came around your neck and squeezed lightly, and your eyes rolled back as the combined sensations of penetration and interrupted air flow became too much.

“You gonna cum for me, pretty baby?” she asked you in a mocking tone, grinning when you responded with incoherent babbling. “Come on, baby. Give me everything you got.”

If you were able to breathe properly, you would’ve screamed when her free thumb met your clit again, and a pressure built between your legs unlike any other. Just when you thought you would explode from the inside out, she pulled the toy out of you and continued rubbing your clit as you squirted all over her legs and the sheets.

Her hand pulled away from your neck and you weakly grabbed it in both of yours, tears escaping the corners of your closed eyes as you shuddered violently against the mattress. She used her free hand to undo the strap and throw the toy off to the side, shushing you as she laid beside you.

“It’s okay, I’m here,” she comforted quietly while she pulled you into her bare chest, rubbing your back gently. “You’re okay.”

“Wanda,” you whispered against her breast and she shushed you again.

“She’s setting up the bath, okay? Come on, let’s go to her. Wan, we need you.”

Wanda came into the room and the two of them guided your shaking form to the tub in the shared bathroom with gentle hands and a bit of assistance from Wanda’s powers to keep you calm. Natasha got in first and you collapsed against her as Wanda helped you in, starting to doze off as she began to wash you.

“I’m going to miss this,” Natasha mumbled, rubbing her thumb across Wanda’s calf with the hand that wasn’t holding onto your waist.

“I know, but I really hope this visit with her cousin is going to help. I can’t handle walking into a room and seeing that gun to her head again or worse.”

Natasha was quick to move her hand under Wanda’s chin, forcing her to meet her gaze. “It won’t happen again. We locked up everything she could possibly hurt herself with.”

“Tash, if she’s desperate enough, she’ll find a way. She needs help, and I think Wesley is help.”

“Alright. But one wrong move, and I swear I’ll come right back here and kill him with my bare hands. Mission be damned.”

“Agreed.”

-

Tags: @littlegasps @imnotasuperhero @nat-km-mh @natasha-danvers @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @creepingwolfberry @emilyprentisswife @becka107 @seventeen0 @bebe404 @its-a-long-way-to-ba-sing-se @fayhar @sxphiaswitch @mjaudrey @messuhp @wannabe-fic-reader @buckmesidewaysandcallmesteve @trikruismybitch @cosmicbrownies7 @cherrieloco @muted-stoneheart @beforeoursecrets @want-to-watch-it-burn @just-a-normalpersons @haiiiloeee2 @natashadeservedmore @witchxaf @darkangelxoxo @sakurat123 

[werenotadulting]

Routine Procedure pt. 2 & 3

(Hello friends. Before we continue, a disclaimer. This story is intended for mature, 18+, kink-friendly audiences. This post contains sexual content.

This story may seem, uh, pretty fucked up. The product that caused Mike's incontinence is purely fictional, but the story can still seem plausible within the realm of reality. Which makes the actions of the characters....well, pretty fucked up. I don't want to spoil the story, but I will leave with this.

Aren't we all, in our own way, a little fucked up?

I'd woken up as we turned onto our street.

"Hey sweetie. We're almost home."

"Huh, wh-...where are we?" I blinked a couple times, my eyes adjusting to the light.

She took my hand in hers. "You're in the car, on the way home from the hospital. There's something I need to-"

Suddenly I was wide awake.

"Oh man, I had the weirdest dream. I was in recovery and all the sudden the doctor is going on about how something went wrong, which is crazy, right? Like it was the easiest of surgeries, so it's not like something could ever go wrong."

Kate just stared straight ahead as she pulled into our driveway.

"Let's talk inside."

────────

"You have to remember to check it every couple of hours, Mike. I can do it for you if want me to."

I glared at her.

"Jesus Kate, don't you think I know that? It's bad enough I have to wear this stupid thing, but you don't have to keep reminding me like I'm some kind of child!"

Was I overreacting? Maybe. Did I have every right to be upset about what I'd woken up to in the hospital? Absolutely. Did Kate deserve me taking my anger out on her?

No. She didn't.

I took a deep breath, counting to ten in my head.

"Okay, listen. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you, I just...I feel like my life just got turned upside down. You're only trying to help and....I'm sorry," I finished lamely.

Kate, noticing my shirt had become tucked into the back of my pull-up, pulled it out.

"I understand, Mike," Kate said, looking at me with sympathy. "You didn't ask for this, plus that whole thing with the clause in the paperwork. There's not much we can do but move on and learn to cope." She stood up, smiling at me. "But on the brightside, no medical bills, plus they're offering to cover the cost of whatever supplies you need. I'm going to be here every step of the way, helping you out however you need it."

Despite her positive outlook, I wasn't swayed. "Oh, sure, great." I laid the sarcasm on thick. "I get to spend the rest of my life peeing myself. The brightside is oh so blinding."

"It was a really long day, babe," Kate said, hushing my attitude and moving behind me as she started to rub my shoulders. "What do you say you take a couple of those sleeping pills, zonk out for the night, and see what kind of fresh perspective tomorrow brings, huh?"

Sleep did sound like the only brief respite I was going to get from this hell.

"If you'd like, I can check you during the night to see if it need changed. That way you can just sleep and not have to worry."

"Umm no, it's fine. I just put it on, so it should last me overnight. You'd probably only wake me up anyway. Thank you though," I said, giving her a small smile. "I'm glad at least one of us is handling this well."

────────

It wasn't until around midnight that Mike finally got comfortable enough to sleep. As Kate looked in on him, she could see that he was still a little restless, tossing and turning as if having a bad dream.

For a brief second she had second thoughts, but quickly shoved them aside. No, she wanted this. Mike needed this. She had waited so long. It was for the best. She looked down on him lovingly.

"Sleep well, my sweet boy. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be just as interesting as today was."

Even when he took sleeping pills, Mike was notoriously a restless sleeper. And she may or may not have poked a couple holes in the pull-up. Mike didn't bother to check, and why should he?

After all, accidents happen.

----------------------

Part 3

Cold.

The first thing that hit me was how cold I was.

That didn't make any sense. I'm in bed, I shouldn't be cold. I grabbed the covers to push them back and immediately realized why I was cold.

The bed, the sheets, the comforter, all of them, were wet.

"Shit."

I saw then why the bed had gotten wet. No. Soaked.

Tossing and turning in my sleep, the pull-up, I presume, had not stayed in place. Meaning the bed had gotten soaked. Meaning I had gotten soaked. Hence...

"Shit."

Kate walked out of the bathroom, her hair wrapped in a towel with a second around her body.

"Hey babe. I had to get up to get cleaned off, because I was covered in...well, yeah. Are you okay?"

I got up and began balling up the sheets and bedspread. "Oh I'm just peachy. I pissed all over myself like a baby last night, so that was fun. I also will continue to piss all over myself no matter what I do, and I'll be stuck doing laundry every day for the rest of my life!"

I threw the bedding on the floor in disgust. Kate took my arm, tenderly, and stopped my tantrum.

"Hey, listen. Strip down, and go take a shower. Take that stupid thing off, get out the loofah, and scrub. I don't want you coming out until you're good and relaxed, you hear me? I'll wash the sheets." As she was saying this, Kate was already moving to take the mattress protector off of the bed.

"No, Kate, stop. You don't have to-"

"Get. In. The. Shower."

"But..."

"NOW!" I can only describe the look she was giving me as domineering. I'd never seen her like this. "Don't make me ask again."

Sheepishly, I began to disrobe.

Kate's voice returned to its normal, caring tone. "Once you're all washed up, meet me in the living room, please. I want to talk to you about something."

────────

Kate was sitting on the couch when I walked out. She pat the cushion next to her, indicating she wanted me to sit down.

"Mike, sweetie. I want you to listen to me without interrupting, okay? And please remember that all I'm saying comes from a place of love and wanting you to be happy," Kate said, her big hazel eyes looking at me imploringly.

"Umm...okay, sure yeah. What's up?" I sat down next to her.

"First, I wanted to reiterate that I understand how frustrated you must be right now. But I don't want to be the target of your outbursts. It's not fair." She paused, looking at me, and I just nodded that I understood.

"Second, I think we both can see that the whole pull-up thing isn't working. I don't want another surprise like last night." Here she stopped again, turning to grab something from behind the couch. She pulled a plastic package out and set it on her lap.

"The hospital gave us these to try if the... if we wanted to try something different," she said, pulling a white rectangle out of the package. It made a rustling sound as she grabbed it.

"Is that a....I am not wearing a diaper!"

"Mike, please, stop. Just listen. You said you wouldn't interrupt." She moved the package back to the floor, keeping the diaper on her lap.

"I'm just asking you to try, for both my sake and yours. Please?"

She didn't continue, so I took that as my cue that I could speak, but I didn't know what to say. I sat in silence, thinking, for what felt like hours.

She had a point. I had slept terribly, which was likely to make me even more irritable. But on the other hand, could I really stand to go through the embarrassment of wearing a diaper? Although I suppose it is preferable to having wet pants. I couldn't imagine the humiliation I would feel if I were to leak all over myself in public.

Finally, I broke the silence.

"I've....I've never had to put on or change a diaper before..." I said finally, hanging my head.

Kate perked up, that smile I loved hinting on her lips.

"I can help with that, babe. Just at first, until you get the hang of it. And if they don't work, we will move on to the next thing, okay?"

"Are you sure d-diapers are the best option?" I had to struggle to get the word out. "How do you know they will help?" I said, unable to take my eyes off of the plastic object on her lap.

"For one, pull-ups are pretty much already diapers. We'd just be changing them even more often."

She picked up the diaper and stood up, pulling me by the hand.

"Second, judging by the fact that I'm going to have to clean that couch cushion, I'd say we need to at least try something."

────────

"Lift up so I can slide this under you."

I obliged, holding my butt up in the air as I lay on the freshly cleaned sheets. I tried to look anywhere but at Kate.

Kate unfolded the diaper, fluffing it slightly. She positioned the diaper under me and I lowered down onto it.

"You know, this doesn't have to be all bad," she said, as she picked up a bottle of baby powder. Why did we even have baby powder? Where did that come from?

"Oh, really? Explain to me what about having my girlfriend change me into a diaper isn't all bad." I continued to stare pointedly at the ceiling.

"For starters," she said, dusting powder on my groin, "there's this." Suddenly, she reached down and began slowly stroking my cock.

"Whuuuuu-oah boy. Um just w-what do you think you're doing?"

"I'm rubbing in the powder, clearly," she said, and I finally looked to see that devilish grin back on her face. "You don't seem to be protesting that...hard," she giggled. "I figured since I'm down here, I might as well make myself useful." Without further preamble, she lowered her mouth and took me inside of it.

"That's..uhhh....o-okay...." I trailed off, lost in a mix of confusion and pleasure. It wasn't long before I was finished, and Kate was sitting back up. She wiped the back of her hand across her mouth and swallowed.

"Wow, you must have enjoyed that, I don't think you've ever cum so quicky."

I was too stunned to speak. My gaze had returned to the ceiling, but I wasn't focused on anything.

Kate started to move again, and I heard that crinkling sound. She pulled the diaper up and taped it snugly in place, securing me into the first of what would soon become my all-too-familiar thick and crinkly underwear.

"So tell me, Mike," she said, patting the front of the diaper as she looked over her handiwork, "was that all bad?"

[shoto-hoedoroki]

Cuffed, a smut by shoto-hoedoroki (NSFW, 18+)

Shoto Todoroki x fem reader, Tags: Handcuffs, boyfriend, sexting, spanking, slight pain kink, hair pulling, fem receiving oral, mirror usage, aged up characters

Word count: 4.2k

This is my first smut piece, so I’m super excited about it, just been horny about a few of the mha boys recently tbh, alr here we go :)

PS: would def do a part 2 if this gets appreciated, might do one regardless, lol!

_____

Ah, team dinners. Always memorable but rarely a joy. You sat near the end of the long wooden dining table between Moms and Su. Across from you sat your boyfriend, Shoto Todoroki, who sat between Izuku and Ochoa.

You and Shoto hadn’t been dating for that long — only around ten months. You’d had sex around the six month mark and it had been intense, to say the least. You and Shoto had an immediate, undeniable passion that couldn’t be ignored.

Recently, you’d been testing the waters with each of your respective sexual desires. It was out of both of your controls, for in the bedroom you lost yourselves to each other. Each first attempt at a new kink was hesitant, but once you both asserted that you were comfortable with it, reigns loosened completely and you had each other. You loved seeing the uncontrolled, heated sexual drive in Shoto’s eyes. He was insatiable. He was your drug.

This week of training at UA had been unforgiving. You’d barely had time with Shoto and you were having serious withdrawals. You could tell through the subtle way that Shoto eyed you from across the table that he was lusting for you in the same way. His eyes, unreadable to most, showed you a dark desire that needed to be satisfied.

Your end of the dining table held kind conversation. Su and Momo were giving Ochaka encouraging words about her training, while Izuku and Todoroki listened and interjected when necessary.

“You’ll figure out a way around the nausea, Ochaka,” Su said, “You always have before.”

“Yeah, I’m just stressed out because everyone else is doing great with their new moves. I don’t wanna fall behind . . .” Ochaka lifted her palms up to her blushing cheeks and spared a quick glance towards Izuku.

“You’ll get there. I’m sure of it!” Mom said, giving Ochaka a firm and encouraging nod.

“Yeah, Ochaka,” Izuku pipe up, “I’m struggling with my new move too. I’m trying my best not to imitate All Might with this one, but considering that he’s the best hero of our age why shouldn’t I be? What standard am I setting for myself if I settle, versus if I . . .”

Those in earshot collectively groaned as Izuku began to ramble intensely while staring at his hands. Beneath the table, something nudged your foot meaningfully. You looked straight ahead and saw Shoto staring at his lap. When he looked up, his eyes immediately met yours and you were faced with a look that made your heart beat faster. The lust in his eyes made it clear what he was going to do to you tonight.

Your phone buzzed in your pocket. As Momo begged Izuku to stop rambling, you pulled it out and checked the notification — a text from Shoto. It read:

‘I’ve got something I want to try out later.’

You glanced up at him with an eyebrow raised, but he was looking off in another direction. Playing hard to get? Or was he just keeping your communications secret, not giving anyone else a hint at what was happening between you?

Regardless, you texted back:

‘What is it, baby?’

You nudged his foot back under the table for fun. He was looking down, undoubtedly at his phone. Your phone buzzed and you eagerly checked it.

Shoto had sent a plain picture of black-rimmed handcuffs lying on his bedspread, probably taken just before dinner and saved for this moment. He just wanted to rile you up in public.

Your jaw dropped reactively; his boldness shocked you. Luckily, screams burst out down the table at that moment. Bakugo was standing at his feet and screaming about someone touching his damn rice. Kirishima and Kaminari cackled before him. You were able to recover yourself before general attention was drawn away from Bakugo’s scene; everyone had first been alerted by the shouting, but it was just Bakugo being Bakugo.

You looked back to Shoto, who was again refusing to meet your eyes. You frowned, trying to craft up a response to his racy text. Suddenly, he shifted his gaze back to you. The corner of his lip was tipped upwards. His ego was feeling boosted tonight, huh? Maybe he’d already gotten himself off earlier to the thought of you trapped in the cuffs beneath him, squirming while he fucked you until you were speechless.

The response then snapped into your mind. You quickly typed it out and pressed send:

Who’s wearing them first?

Now it was your turn to grin. You looked back up the table to Shoto. He took out his phone again. You carefully watched as his eyes scanned over your daring words. At first, his eyes widened, but just as quickly they narrowed. He shot you a predatory glance up between his lashes.

Your phone buzzed. Shoto said:

I’m in charge of you tonight, baby. You’re mine.

You squirmed in your seat at the words and looked up once more to your boyfriend. He was leaning back in his seat, comfortably smirking at you, his arms crossed and his dress shirt pushed up sexily to his elbows. Maybe what was most sexy was how clueless everyone else around you was, and how meaningful that smirk was to you.

****

The dinner ended, and as everyone walked back to their respective dorm rooms, you and Shoto both lingered in the common area. You bade your classmates goodnight one by one. You could practically feel the passionate heat waving off of Shoto. He didn’t say goodnight to any of your classmates; perhaps he was too worked up to even use his voice.

Finally, the pair of you were finally alone. You glanced up to see that he was already gazing down at you. Something deep and primitive was showing in his eyes.

“Follow me.” He murmured, before grabbing your hand and beginning to walk in the direction of his dorm room.

The walk was silent. You were nervous and so excited. Your heart raced as imaginative images flashed through your mind of what was potentially to come.

Shoto lead you around the corner and finally, after what felt like eternity, you were at his door. He pushed it open and you followed him in. You barely got passed the threshold when he turned and placed his palm against the inside of the door. He pressed it shut, effectively pushing you against the door and trapping you beneath his arms. He leaned over you, and you could merely cower beneath his lusted gaze. His breaths lightly puffed against your forehead.

“I can’t wait to taste you tonight, y/n.” Shoto murmured, leaning close to your ear so his breath tickled it and his gravelly voice was incredibly clear. “I’ve been thinking about touching your little pussy all week.”

You exhaled as the gravity of his words set in. He pressed his lips against your ear, then placed multiple kisses along the side of your face until he made it to your neck. You couldn’t help yourself as your hands reached forward, burrowing under his shirt to feel his abs beneath your fingers. You relished the softness of his skin and reached to grip at his muscled back, pulling him closer to you. He grunted in pleasure and gave your neck a small suck before pulling away entirely.

You released a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding. He turned and walked over to his bed. You spotted the handcuffs from the photo behind him. Shoto reached overhis head and gripped the back of his shirt before pulling it off and tossing it aside. Your gaze went hazy as you watched this show. His back looked so damn taut.

Shoto turned around, now just in slacks. He had a thin, short silver chain hanging from his neck that you hadn’t noticed beneath his shirt earlier. The cuffs were in his palms.

“Come here.” He instructed. You obliged. He reached for your hands and you watched as he carefully cuffed your hands together in front of your torso. There was a serene focus on his face that nearly made you shudder with anticipation.

“On the bed.”

You obliged, easily, scooting back near the headboard. Shoto climbed over you, and you tried to keep your eyes on his face but they lowered to see his defined pecs and abs flex as he made his way up the bed, and you were in a trance at how his v-line so suggestively dipped beneath his slacks . . .

While you weren’t paying attention, Shoto grabbed your wrists with his left hand and forced them over your head. You gasped as he used ice to freeze the handcuffs, and your hands, to the headboard.

“Shouldn’t have let your guard down,” Shoto growled, “What were you saying earlier during dinner? That for some maniacal reason you thought you’d be in control tonight? No, y/n . . . You’re fucking mine tonight.”

You pulled downwards a bit as to test the strength of your cuffs, but as usual his ice was impeccable. You looked up and saw that same subtle smirk on his lips, just a mere upwards twitch of one corner of his mouth. And still, ever-present in those eyes, the undeniable, heated lust of somebody who was about to fuck his girlfriend senseless.

“Fuck, Shoto,” You breathed, helpless.

Shoto then bent down and finally pressed his lips to yours. You immediately melted to his touch, giving a small sigh of satisfaction against his lips. While he began to unbutton your blouse, you wrapped your legs around his hips. Shoto gave a low moan and pressed inwards so you could feel how hard he was already. Fuck, each time you felt his hard cock, even beneath his pants, the size of it shocked you.

Shoto pulled away from your lips and began to press kisses down to your chest, eager to suck on your exposed nipples. He gave them sharp flicks with his tongue, and you pressed your chest upwards into his mouth, wishing you could grab his hair but unable to move your arms at all.

“My favorite thing about this —“ Shoto said, pulling up and then going back down for a quick nip, “— is that I could restrain your entire body with my ice if I wanted to.”

You clenched your legs around his hips, and Shoto hummed a small, lustful chuckle against your chest.

“But then I wouldn’t be able to fuck you in any way that I want.” Shoto spared a glance up at you, tweaking your nipple just as he made eye contact. He forced you to watch as his slick tongue darted from his lips and began to encircle on the nub.

Your head fell back and you unashamedly moaned.

“No, baby,” Shoto said, and you felt his hand leave your chest and wrap behind your head, entangling his fingers in your hair. He then forced your head upwards again, “Eyes on me.”

So you watched helplessly as he pulled away from your tits and allowed his fingers to slowly trail down your sides. You squirmed beneath him.

“Please, Shoto,” You breathed, wiggling your hips slightly, pushing up against his. Shoto bit his lip and cocked his head, as if restraining himself, and let out a short groan.

“So impatient,” Shoto said, “You’re lucky that I'm feeling impatient myself. I just can’t wait to feel how wet that tiny little pussy is for me.”

He dug his fingers beneath the waist band of your skirt and panties, pulling both downwards. You lifted your knees to help the process until finally he tossed aside the fabric and you were fully exposed beneath him.

Shoto then bent forward, holding himself up directly over you and giving you a short, deep kiss. He pulled away so his face was only inches from yours. You couldn’t look away from his dark, needy eyes.

You felt his fingers slip between your legs, pressing up against your entrance. Shoto’s lips fell open slightly, and he easily slid a finger in. The maintained eye contact made it all the more intense.

“Fu-uck, y/n,” He breathed out, pulling the finger out and sliding it back in agonizingly slow, “I can’t wait to have a taste..”

“I can’t wait to feel you inside of me, Shoto.” You gazed in his eyes with a helpless look, knowing it would be his undoing. Shoto bit down on his lip, hard; his finger plunged into you, causing you to moan slightly, and he closed his eyes.

He moved quickly away from your face and down between your legs. He placed his hands behind your knees and pushed them upwards towards your head until your ass was entirely off the bed. Your pussy was angled directly into the air. Finally, he moved his large hands down to stretch them over your thighs and hold you there.

You stared up at him, loving the way his muscles flexed as he held your pussy up to him while holding you against the bed.

Shoto bent down and you watched as his tongue darted from his lips. It was cool against your entrance, and he licked slowly up the wet slit to your clit, where he traced small circles around the sensitive nub.

“You taste like fucking heaven,” Shoto breathed against your pussy before placing his lips in a kiss around your clit. He then dragged his tongue back down to your entrance and pushed it inwards. You moaned as his tongue danced inside of you, licking up your wetness. Shoto moaned against your opening, his breath tickling your clit. Your thighs shook, threatening to press inwards, but fuck he was strong and held them steadily spread so he could fully taste your pussy.

Your arms jerked downwards but you were fully helpless. You couldn’t even fight out of this with your quick, not like you’d want to. Shoto’s tongue flicked at your clit, earning a spiral of moans from you. He buried his lips between your pussy folds and sucked, gently applying his teeth to elicit a loud moan and full body clench from you.

“Fuck, Shoto! Nn-h . . .” You braced your teeth and he chuckled against your pussy.

“You like that, baby?” Shoto asked, his voice rumbling low and sending vibrations against your pussy. You glanced downward, met by those damn two-toned eyes from between your thighs, and watched his tongue dart from his lips and press on your clit. You moaned, your head falling back between your arms, and your legs twitching together, but once again held down by his pure strength.

“Mmmm-hmm, yes, I fucking love it . . . Please, keep going.” You panted. But then, his tongue pulled away. Your jaw dropped as he pulled himself back upwards, that stupid victorious smirk on his eyes. You watched his tongue slowly lick your wetness from his own lips and then retreat into his mouth.

“I could eat this pussy all night,” Shoto said, “But like I told you earlier, what I say right now . . . Goes.”

He then pulled down his slacks, allowing his fully hard cock to spring outwards. Shoto brought himself back up towards your head and began to kiss you; he laid a hand around your head and gripped your hair in his hand. You whimpered and clenched your thighs around his muscular torso, and he growled in pleasure against your lips. You knew how much Shoto liked to feel your reactions to his stimulation. He gripped your hair tighter to earn himself more of you wrapping around his body.

“Fuck, baby.” He breathed. You wanted to jerk your damn arms out of the handcuffs so you could feel his slick, sexy torso that was mere inches above yours.

You felt the head of his cock pressing against your pussy and you leaned your hips into it. Shoto didn’t fight it, allowing the head of his cock to slip past your pussy lips. He let out a low moan and thrusted forth another inch, but stopped before he could fully enter you. He remained exactly where he was, only an inch past the tip inside of you, leaving you a whimpering mess on the bed.

“Fuck me. Please,” You whispered. You wrapped your thighs around his back to keep him from getting to far as he leaned back slightly. In the reflecting light in the dark room, his torso looked so damn muscular. The chain on his chest glinted gently in the light, hanging between you two. 

“Beg all you want, but we’re doing things my way.” Fuck, the feeling of him so close to being inside of you but not quite was agonizing.

“You’re going to come on my cock more than once tonight.” Shoto purred before pressing forward again, and suddenly you could another inch of his cock between your pussy, and now that it was in more, you could feel its thickness widening your pussy lips. You nearly shuddered, “So we’re gonna start off slow.”

Before he even bottomed inside of you for the first time that night, you felt his thumb press onto your clit and began to move in slow, teasing, circular motions. He was gazing into your eyes darkly, searching for your satisfaction, and you felt the full length of his cock slowly begin to slip past your folds into your pussy.

“I love feeling your cunt stretch out for me. It’s so damn tight.” Shoto said, continuing to massage your clit as his cock moved slowly into you, inch by damn inch. You panted on the bed, maintaining that eye contact, and already your legs were beginning to tremble.

“Fuck, Shoto, I want you to fuck me harder!” You begged, leaning towards him the most you could while cuffed and looking into his eyes. Damn, you were pathetic. But at that moment, you let out a whimper; his dick hadn’t even fully entered your vagina, but it was already pressing against your cervix.

Todoroki let out a low moan. His eyelids fluttered in pleasure. He leaned his torso down, propped up by one hand, and kissed you, leaving his length as deeply as he could inside of you for the time being. Your entire body was beginning to twitch with pleasure as his thumb’s movements increased in pressure and intensity on your clit.

Todoroki pulled away from the kiss and bent down over your ear, and finally began pumping in and out of you, so very slowly. You wrapped your thighs around his back to keep him from moving away, because you loved feeling his low, deep breaths right against your ear as he fucked you.

You were moaning louder and louder. His finger was now flicking and rubbing your clit just the way you know Todoroki loved to; it’s the way he manipulated you when he wanted you to come.

“Please, make me cum,” You whimpered through moans in his ear. Shoto became riled at the words and gave slow, hard thrust into you. You cried out and clenched around him.

“Cum for me, baby. I wanna feel that little pussy cum all over my cock.” He was flicking your clit so quickly, and you felt the blood rush to your face as you came, moaning and wrapping around him and cooing his name as he eased you to your finish. Shoto matched your moans in your ear, undoubtedly loving the feeling of your pussy clenching and fluttering around his thick cock.

He relinquished pressure on your clit after you finished and leaned up the moment your legs relaxed around him. However, he left his cock in, and as you panted on the bed, you spared a glance upwards to see the deep lust still ever present in his eyes.

One of his arms was reaching over you and you realized he was melting the ice around your handcuffs. As you recovered from your orgasm, Todoroki tilted you on your side and redid the handcuffs, this time behind your back instead of in front of you.

“Are — are we switching positions?” You asked through deep breaths — you couldn’t help the long recovery time it took from the orgasms Shoto gave you.

“What, you thought I was done with you?” Todoroki said in a low, dangerous voice. He grabbed the chain linking the handcuffs together and you arranged yourselves so that you were on your knees facing the edge of the bed, while he was behind you. Both of you faced the mirror that he had just hung before his bed. In the mirror you could see yourself on your knees, face flushed and tits swelled with gravity. Positioned behind you, also on his knees, Shoto was holding you upright by gripping the chain of the handcuffs in his left hand. You watched his eyes rake over your ass before reeling back with his free hand and placing a sharp smack on your cheek.

You let out a squeal, but quickly pleaded, “Smack it again.”

Todoroki obliged, and you watched as his right palm glowed red; he was employing the kink you’d tried last week. As his hand contacted your ass cheek, you let out a yelp, but you loved the pain that his heated hand brought to you, because fuck, it was him. You knew a fire-powered spank would leave a mark, but you loved that it was his mark. 

You then felt his cock, just as hard as before, nestle between your pussy lips.

“Still dripping for me, huh?” Todoroki asked, and you watched in the mirror as he leaned his torso back in order to watch his cock slip into your cunt.

“Shi — i — t,” He groaned and you gave a high moan as he bottomed within you. His meaty cock made you feel so damn full, you could happily sit on it all day. Shit, right now you were essentially trapped with it inside of you, as he was gripping the handcuff chain tight to keep you from rebounding away.

“Your cock feels amazing, stretching me out like it is,” You breathed. You knew how closer to the edge the praise sent him.

He pulled out and gave a heavy, fast thrust inwards, letting himself sink all the way into your pussy with another deep moan. “Y/n, you feel so fucking good. I feel like I could come right now.”

You watched him thrust in again with the mirror, loving the way his abs and pecs flexed as he pushed into you, the way his chain rested on his muscles. When he pulled out again, he looked back into the mirror to meet your eyes.

“But I won’t cum. I’m not done with this cunt yet.”

You shuddered at the intensity of his words. “Fuck me harder, Shoto,” You said breathily.

Slowly, his pace picked up. He was gaining momentum, steadily pumping that thick cock into you, and you could feel him at your center with each thrust, and you watched as he bit his lip and flashed his teeth in frustrating lust as he thrusted.

He maintained a steady speed, not one of a man who was about to come, but of a man who was loving the pussy he was fucking. You continued to watch him and to feel him fuck you simultaneously, letting out especially loud moans whenever he bumped your cervix or g-spot.

“Yes, Shoto, you look so fucking good!” You moaned as you gazed over his muscled, gleaming body, and he let his heated hand fly onto your ass a few times.

“God, I love the way you tighten up when I spank you,” He said, slowing his pace momentarily. As he slowly thrusted inwards, he placed a sharp smack on your asscheek, and another. He must not have been lying about how good it felt, because he growled and immediately sped up once more to a destructive pace.

He reached around and grabbed a fistful of your hair in his palm. He now held total control of your body; the two reigns he held, your hair and your handcuffed arms, allowed him to fucking ravage your pussy.

You were now unleashing endless moans, feeling your pussy close up as his cock continuously slammed onto the sweet spot deep within you, and feeling his hips bump your ass. He’d never fucked you this deep before.

“I’m — I’m gonna cum!” You could barely breathe out the words. His dick was so deep you couldn’t think straight. All you could feel was Shoto.

“Cum for me, baby,” Shoto growled, relentlessly fucking you. The sound of his skin slapping on yours, of his dick slamming into your juicy cunt, of his deliriously luscious and sexy breaths leaving him, was all you could hear.

You let out a moan that increased in pitch until you were nearly screaming.

“Just like that, baby,” Shoto groaned, gripping your hair tighter as you rode out your high on his cock. His balls were tightening and his face was heating as well as his own orgasm rapidly approached. He continued fucking you as deep as your clenching pussy would allow him — fuck he was so close —

With one final deep, hard push into you, you watched in the mirror as Shoto’s eyes fluttered closed, and you felt his cock begin to twitch and release his cum into your cunt. You moaned — your pussy could not be more stuffed — and Shoto groaned above you, his grip on your cuffs and your hair trembling.

Finally, he relaxed, letting you gently down onto the mattress. He nearly keeled over with pleasure, and sat to the side before undoing your handcuffs.

“Mm, that was so good.” You panted, sliding onto your back, eyes closed. You could feel his cum dribbling out of you at that moment.

Shoto peered between your legs, and you watched the focused expression on his face as he pushed it back into you with a finger before bringing the finger to your lips to suck on. After removing it, he placed a kiss to your lips and a much gentler hand in your hair.

“It was amazing.” Shoto said. His voice was so deep that it gave you butterflies.

“I’ll go grab you one of my sweatshirts and we can cuddle, would you like that?” He offered, getting up from the bed.

You sighed in pleasure. “Yes. But . . . Next time, you’re wearing the cuffs.”

You heard his deep chuckle from across the room.

“Fine, give me twenty minutes and I’ll put them on.”