#and my cousin wants to bring MORE BANANA PUDDING send help

[autumnoficarus]

this holiday break has my sleep schedule MESSED tf up rip future me after this pto vacay is up

[agustdef]

Annoying Family| Christmas Oneshot

Pairing: Namjoon x OC 

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 4,404

Warning: None.

Prompt: “So, still no boyfriend this year, huh?” // “Still no job, huh?” 

Author’s Note: This is my second and last Christmas prompt. It’s a tiny bit more festive but not much more than the other. 

“Are you happy? Can I go inside now?” Lane asked.

With a shaky hand, she tapped the icon on the screen so her front camera was in use again so Namjoon was looking at her. He wore a stupid grin and shook his head no.

“And why not?”

“You only let me see it for a few seconds. Let me look at it longer. It’s beautiful the way your mom decorated and all the snow makes it better,” he said as he pouted.

“Yeah. The snow that is making my feet cold because I’m standing in it. The snow that is being maintained because it’s cold outside, which is making the rest of me cold.”

Rolling her eyes, she stood there for a moment, watching him try to intensify his pout in order to sway her. Those damn dimples almost had her, but in the end, she stormed back towards the house and walked inside, slamming the door behind her.

“Lane…”

“Lane my ass. It’s cold. And you act like you won’t see this entire set up when you get here in a few hours.”

“But it’ll be dark by then.”

“Do you plan to come for the evening and leave tomorrow morning or something? Have you suddenly decided not to be here for almost two weeks?”

Lane was having a hard time humoring him anymore as she kicked off the slippers she’d been wearing and searched for another pair. The clear irritation on her features wasn’t much of a deterrent for Namjoon though. He opened his mouth to say something else, but before he could or she could cut him off another voice rang out and caught their attention.

“Lane!” her mother shouted.

Without a word just Lane just walked towards the sound of her voice, finding her and a few aunts moving about the kitchen getting stuff done.

“Yes?” Lane asked.

“Call your brother and make sure he brings home enough pet milk for the banana pudding. And also make sure they’re on their way back and not making sixteen other stops. I need it now,” she said, all while never turning away from stirring something in a pot.

“Yes, ma’am.”

Just as Lane was about to tell Namjoon she’d call him back he shouted, “Hi mama!”

That got her mother’s attention. She turned her head to the side and motioned Lane forward so she could see the phone. Lane moved closer and held the phone out, avoiding the steam since the thing was half dead and if a hint of water got into the port, she wouldn’t be able to charge it for hours.

“Hi, baby. Are you almost here?” she asked.

Namjoon smiled and nodded. “Yes, I just have this last flight out of Chicago. They said we’re boarding early.”

Lane scoffed. “Only you would have the luck of a flight boarding early with snow in the near forecast.” 

That made both of them glare at her, but she merely shrugged and shifted her attention to her aunt working on the dressing. She was stirring the mixture before pouring it into the pan and it made Lane’s stomach stir in wanting and disdain. It was her least favorite food for the holidays and they’d made a big batch. Her mother would probably try to coerce her to eat at least one serving of it, even if it was just a forkful.

“Okay, make sure you message La before you land so we can send someone to go and get you. No reason to pay all that money a taxi or Lyft will charge you.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Namjoon said.

A tap on the shoulder brought Lane’s full attention back to the two of them. Her mother was focused on the pot again but glanced up for a moment.

“Lane go get ready and call your brother, please. We’ll need your help in here in a minute and you won’t have time to change later.”

Nodding Lane made her escape upstairs to her old bedroom to get ready. She’d kind of forgotten about Namjoon being on the phone and tossed it on the bed as she slipped out of her gray tracksuit onesie. It wasn’t until she was leaning over it, breasts practically spilling out of her bra that she remembered. 

Or was reminded.

“I was going to complain about being forgotten, but this makes up for it,” Namjoon said. 

Lane rolled her eyes and picked up the phone, the shirt she was reaching for momentarily forgotten. 

“Never mind. I don’t want you to come here for Christmas. Go back to Korea, I’ll see you in two weeks.”

He tried to stifle his laugh, but no matter how much she frowned and looked ready to throw a tantrum his lips quirked up. 

“You really going to make me spend Christmas Eve in this airport and then Christmas on a plane back home? With your present in hand?” he asked.

She almost said yes. But he’d take her up on that bluff and she would never deny that she missed the dork and didn’t want to wait another two weeks to see him again.

Lane sighed. “No.”

“Exactly, so…” Before he could finish his sentence, a voice sounded on his end and though Lane couldn’t hear it clearly, she saw people moving, which meant it was time to board.

“Okay, I have to go.”

“That’s fine, I needed to get ready and call Jacob anyway. Do not want my mom killing either of us. But make sure you to text me like twenty minutes out.”

Namjoon was distracted grabbing his carry-on stuff that she thought she’d need to repeat herself until he’d had his ticket scan and he was walking towards the plane. His attention moved back to her.

“Okay, I will. I love you. Later.”

“I love you too.”

And with that she hung up the phone, rushing to slip her shirt over her head and slip on her pants as well. She managed to call her brother and get her hair out of the twists she’d put them in the night before. Having wanted to braid it but decided that it would be too much work. 

Cutting her hair a few weeks before meant that she had to blow dryer or flat iron her hair straight so it was long enough for some styles and she wasn’t in the mood for all that. It could live its life in a curly-coily fro atop her head until she felt like doing something more with it or it grew out long enough. 

Once finished she got downstairs and was thrown into one task after the other. She helped in the kitchen to finish up or start some of the dishes. Somehow when her brother arrived, she was roped into helping with the Christmas lights on the tree since the others blew the night before, but he’d neglected to tell her he hadn’t bought new ones. Instead, she spent forever on the floor detangling the ones that he brought.

When that was finally done, she’d ended up back in the kitchen and helping remove things from the oven to switch them out with other stuff. By that time, it was too many people in there, others arriving and trying to talk, sneak something, or help where it wasn’t needed.

It’s how she ended up releasing a loud, but short scream and nearly dropping the macaroni and cheese she was trying to put into the oven. Her cousin was trying to sneak by to grab something she was told to let be and was bumped by another cousin trying to help with something and her arm hit the stove door.

“For the last time: everyone get out!” her aunt yelled.

With that they all scattered and if they didn’t move fast enough, they were practically shoved out. The remaining people converged on her and got her away from the stove and towards the sink. It wasn’t until her wrist was tightly wrapped in gauze that the pain moved to a dull ache.

“Go sit down and don’t let anyone tell you to do anything or help them with anything. Also, tell Miss Kendall if she want to be in here so damn bad touching stuff, she can come help us cook then,” Lane’s great aunt, May, said.

She nodded and headed out, only needing to make eye contact with Kendall for her to know what to do. This wasn’t the first time she’d been caught doing something and was forced into helping with the cooking - and it was never the fun or easy part of the cooking either.

Lane just kept going though, finding an empty couch and plopping down. She wasn’t alone for long though, because soon her nephew was beside her and other cousins and aunts were sitting nearby.

“Why was Ken so mopey going into the kitchen?” Marie - her aunt, who was younger than her, asked.

Lane and her cousin Xavier spoke at the same time.

“She bumped me and I burned my arm.”

“The uncles got ahold of her boyfriend and are holding him hostage to scare the shit out of him in the den.”

His comment had everyone whipping their heads to stare at him, eyes wide in shock. Even Lane didn’t think her burn was as bad as what they’d heard.

That poor man was in danger. They were assholes and would poke and poke all they wanted until they got the result they wanted. But she didn’t want that thought to dampen everyone’s moods.

“I’m sure he’s fine.”

“He’s the one who broke up with her because he let his friends tell him that he needed to branch out before he could truly say he was in love with her,” Marie said while stifling a giggle.

Lane grimaced but tried to rein in her expression. “I’m sure, they won’t… murder him or make him cry.”

They all just stayed there for a moment, mulling over her words and trying to figure out what to say next. Lane was feeling bad for the girl and didn’t know what exactly to do.

“Fu…” Marie started, but then realized Lane’s nephew was sitting there. “Skip it, I’m going to go save him.”

She strutted off with that and Lane was sure she’d get him out of there. Despite being the youngest they all listened to her because she was, in fact, an aunt and the sibling to two of them. Plus, she was mean as hell when she needed to be.

In her absence Lane planned to continue the conversation, but then her phone buzzed aggressively in her pocket. She pulled it out and saw something coming through via Messenger.

Joon: Landing in 20

Joon: Might be slightly sooner

Joon: Getting mixed messages from pilot

Joon: Either way, there in 20

Lane had already started glancing around for her brother and after a few seconds made eye contact with him. All she had to do was raise her phone and he was moving towards the door.

“Where is dad going?” her nephew, Alexander, asked.

“Joon texted me,” she said.

“I’m going with him!”

And with that Alexander shot off the couch and headed towards the door. Shouting for his dad to wait for him as he headed out of the door.

Marie returned by the time they’d left and she had a man with her, who looked only a little bit scared. She directed him to the kitchen where Kendall was and then plopped down where Alexander had been sitting before.

Lane:  Jacob and Alex are on the way

Marie was leaning over as she typed and she had to push her head away until she pressed send and put the phone back into her pocket. Turning her head, she stared at Marie.

“Can I help you?” Lane asked.

“Is that him?” Marie whispered.

“Yup.”

“He’s coming now?”

“Yup.”

Then Marie swatted her arm. “Girl you better give me more than a yup.”

“What more do you… Oh my goodness you have got to be fucking kidding me?” Lane was prepared to keep messing with her, but then the front door opened and in strolled her cousin Shaun.

He was wearing that cocky smirk and had some girl attached to his arm. She seemed nice from first glance, but the fact that she was with the little shit made Lane very weary of that.

“I thought he wasn’t coming,” Marie said.

“I almost prayed so he wouldn’t come,” Lane muttered.

Xavier, who’d gotten distracted in a different conversation leaned over. “He said he wasn’t coming and then last minute changed his mind. We all hoped he’d just go off to Greece or wherever the hell he said he was going.”

Lane felt her mood drop so much. Shaun was annoying as hell; he had been his entire life and it only got worse as he aged. And when he’d gotten a job that allowed for travel that just completed his transformation. Lane was the kind of person that traveled and encouraged her family to do the same but didn’t use it as some sort of thing that made her better. Shaun however, enjoyed being the bougie person who held all his travels in high regard. The little shit saw himself as elite and at one point regarded Lane as the same. Until he realized she was exploring the world like him, but not treating that ability as something that made her superior.

For four years she’d had to deal with his bullshit and when he locked eyes with her after hugging his mother, she knew he’d continue it. 

And without missing a beat, he made his way over towards their little collective and smiled down at her. 

“Hey everyone,” he said.

Xavier, his brother, got up to hug him and everyone else just muttered soft hellos. No one really liked dealing with him, but not speaking meant that he’d get extra annoying and no one wanted that either. 

“And this is my girlfriend, Kiara.”

Another round of hellos went out, though they were much nicer and enthusiastic than the other ones. They didn’t know her, so there was no need to be jerks towards her. That was reserved for Shaun until she did something to set someone off.

And then his attention was on Lane. “I’m so glad that we could be here at the same time La. We’ve missed each other for like three years on Christmas.”

“Sure,” Lane said.

Shaun sighed, still staring down at Lane; but the smile was gone and replaced by a fake ass look of concern that she could spot a mile away. 

“Did you…”

Before he could finish Lane’s name was called from the kitchen and she happily excused herself. When she entered, she was asked to handle the banana pudding because she was one of the few who knew how to do it right. So, she washed her hands and got to work laying down the layers of cookies and bananas in the pans. Once finished she poured over the cooled - but still hot as hell - pudding mixture over top each of them. She only poured a little at a time so not to accidentally overfill anything. 

By the time she was done and shooed back out of the kitchen, people had dispersed and she found her former spot empty. She plopped down onto the couch and was joined by her niece, who’d disappeared the moment she entered the house hours before.

“Can you play this round for me? I can’t get passed it,” Alexis asked.

Lane looked toward her and noticed that she was playing Luigi’s Mansion 3 aka the early Christmas present that she’d slipped her when she’d arrived home for the holidays a week before.

“I can try,” she said.

Taking the system in her hands she focused on the screen, trying to remember how to get through that part of the game. She had it for her own Switch, but it had been a few weeks since she’d had it right in front of her.

Several attempts later and they’d cleared that part of the game and Alexis took over again, though she remained where she was. So, Lane watched on as she continued through the game. 

It was nice and peaceful until Shaun showed up again with his girlfriend still clinging to him and looking nervous. Lane tried to ignore him, but he just kept standing there and being weird. Which was also something she could ignore, but then he spoke.

“Did you come by yourself this year too?” he asked.

Lane just rolled her eyes and continued focusing on the game. The creepy music that started as something lurked pulled her in and she was almost completely unaware of him, but he just kept talking. 

“So, yes?” 

“Why would you assume that?” Lane asked without looking at him.

“You look so lonely over here. Sitting with a kid instead of talking to the adults,” he said.

That made her look up to see his stupid, smug face and his girlfriend’s obvious discomfort.

“So, spending time with my niece and playing a game with her, screams lonely to you? Maybe if you spent time with yours, you’d see it’s anything but that.”

Shaun scoffed. “I’m busy and can’t see her often. That doesn’t mean I don’t spend time with her. And even so, that doesn’t mean I’d abandon Kiara to do it. So, you have to have come alone.”

Lane opened her mouth to respond but thought better of it and refocused on Alexis and her game. She’d made some major progress while Lane’s attention was elsewhere. 

Again, she’d hoped that it was the end of their conversation, but Shaun just stood there and said nothing. Minutes went by and it just grew more uncomfortable and Lane was ready to snap.

Then Shaun sighed, though it was more like a sound of pity than anything else. Who he was pitying she was unsure, because he surely couldn’t have deluded himself into thinking she needed pity, let alone his pity.

“So, still no boyfriend this year, huh?” he asked.

“Still no job, huh?” she asked, not missing a beat.

Shaun’s eyes went wide and his lips parted, a soft gasp leaving them. He didn’t seem to know what to say, mouth opening and closing as he tried to find the right words. It was amusing to watch. He was floundering for something, probably never expecting her to be aware of his little secret.

After a minute of silence, he finally found his voice. “What the hell gives you the impression that I don’t have a job? You know very well I do. I even came to your company last month to work on a project.”

“Yes. A project you failed to see through and thus were let go for. Which wasn’t the first project you’ve messed up for that brand and thus why your termination came about so swiftly.”

Again, he seemed unable to speak and his girlfriend looked like she was holding in laughter at his expense.

“H-how...”

He didn’t get far before the front door swung open and in came Jacob with two bags in his hand and Alexander trailing behind him. A few seconds later Namjoon appeared in the doorway, eyes sweeping the space until they landed on Lane.

Lane quickly rose from her seat, though not faster than Alexis who’d bolted towards him before she could. By the time she reached him Alexis was done hugging him and showing the game Lane got her, so she had his full attention. 

Without a word, he pulled her into a tight hug and she wrapped her arms around his waist.

“I missed you,” she said, though it was muffled in his shirt.

“I missed you too,” he said.

They stayed like that for a bit until there was a squeal heard from behind them. Namjoon pressed a kiss on her forehead before turning his attention to her mother who was politely shoving Lane to the side in order to hug him.

“I’m glad you could make it.”

“Of course. I said I wouldn’t miss it, mama.” 

They hugged for a little longer before Lane’s mother turned around to address the room, which had grown in capacity since everyone heard the commotion. 

“This is my baby, Namjoon. He’s Lane’s boyfriend and all of you will leave him alone. I don’t wanna see not one of you pestering him or trying to intimidate him. He’s too damn sweet for all that.”

Everyone remained silent, most people just nodding in agreement while others just continued to assess the situation. But none of them looked ready to try her, which was good because the way she glared at them had Lane nervous and she was one of the few definitely safe from her wrath.

Seconds passed and everyone went back to what they were doing. A few not in the living room before lingered and watched, possibly waiting to talk to him or observe their interactions.

Lane led him through the house so he could speak to everyone and then they made their way to the couch where the twins were. Plopping down they only released hands so Namjoon could wrap his arm around her shoulders.

His attention went to Alexander showing him the game he was playing until they were ambushed by cousins and aunts asking a million questions. And at the very back of the group stood Shaun, pouting but listening closely. 

--------------------------------------------------------

“Tell me why we had to come to the hotel instead of just staying at the house, where you have a room?” Namjoon asked.

Lane sighed and turned to look at him as he walked out of the bathroom with a towel on his head. He was only wearing pajama pants because the room was very warm and neither of them were to keen on making it cooler just so they could wear extra clothes. She had opted for just wearing one of his shirts over her undergarments. 

“Because they’re too many people there and my aunt was staying over, so her taking my bed was a better idea. Plus, you already had this room and needed to check-in before they thought you weren’t coming.”

Namjoon huffed. “It’s 2:00 am they should’ve already given it away.”

Rolling her eyes Lane finished tucking her hair under the black bonnet she wore and laid down on the bed.

“Can you just come to bed so we can sleep. Unless you want to whine about it until it’s too late for us to go to bed?” 

Namjoon huffed, tossing the towel onto the back of the chair and flopping onto the bed with all his limbs spread out. His eyes remained closed and he refused to look at Lane. For a minute or two, she thought he was asleep, and then he groaned.

“And we have to get up early to get back over there?”

Lane scoffed. “You classify getting up at eleven early?”

Namjoon shot up into a sitting position, eyes wide as he stared at Lane. “Eleven? You mean we don’t have to get there early for other stuff? Breakfast? Presents? Some sort of family event?”

Lane rolled onto her side and shook her head.

“We eat on Christmas Eve because no one feels like cooking on Christmas. We know that’ll last until late and also loathe the idea of getting up early for presents that will be there regardless of the time. And everyone is in charge of their own breakfast if they get up for it. Lunch is leftovers and dinner is when we all go out to a restaurant. Sometimes we break up into groups and people go to different places because it makes no sense to have to eat out where you don’t want to.”

The more Lane said the more relieved Namjoon appeared to be until he had slumped to the point that he was laying down again. His body was much more relaxed than when they’d gotten to the hotel.

“I love your family,” he mumbled.

“Yes, they’re great. Now could you please cuddle me. I missed it. And it’s Christmas, so denying me would be rude,” Lane whined.

Namjoon’s entire demeanor changed and suddenly their bodies were pressed together, his arm wrapped firmly around her waist - there would be no escape for her, even though she had zero plans of escaping.

He smiled at her, dimples clear as day and deepening the longer he stared at her. But she stayed strong and decided not to melt instantly.

“It would be rude? What was cuddling on your list to Santa this year?” he asked.

Lane had no shame and nodded. “Yes, it was. Now you must fulfill it on his behalf. Please, and thank you.”

“But I fulfilled one of the other things on the list. If I have to do more than one than what the hell is he doing?”

“Give me my damn cuddles you LOTR elf. I have been deprived long enough.”

Namjoon laughed. “Okay, okay. Damn.”

Releasing her he got out of the bed and turned off all the lights and turned on the TV. He went to Netflix and put on The Office before climbing back into the bed. Laying on his back he pulled Lane closer and she threw a leg across his waist and rested her head on his shoulders. His arms went around her, one resting on her butt and the other her back.

After a few seconds they both settled in and Lane felt her body relax better than it had in a while.

“I missed this,” she mumbled.

“Me too.”

Lane felt a hand under her chin and then her head was tilted back. From that angle she could look directly at Namjoon, who was smiling at her, despite looking so tired that he could pass out.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

He leaned closer and kissed her, it was gentle and warm. There was no attempt to deepen it or make it something more, just a simple kiss. When he pulled away, he was still smiling, but his eyes had fluttered closed.

“Merry Christmas baby,” he said as he drifted off.

“Merry Christmas.”

And they both fell into a deep slumber, wrapped in each other and comfortable for the first time in weeks. 

[guacameowle]

Hi Lynn! :) Do you have any modern!au for the Lords of SLBP?

I had multiple requests for this in my inbox. It’s not terribly long & a lot of it turned into crack headcanons... oops.

Nobunaga – He’s a businessman, CEO of his own company. He enjoys all aspects of acquisitions & mergers. Wears Versace suits like a second skin all the time. He has a reputation of being a playboy & appears in magazines every month with a new partner on his arm. His Aston Martin Vanquish is just as silver as his tongue. “Your words can’t hurt me; these shades are Gucci.” His best friend is a goody two-shoes doctor who accompanies him to every gala – they’ve become a dynamic duo of sorts. Complains about the weird smelling tea his friend always makes him try. Has always wanted a pet dog.

Mitsuhide – Medical Cardiologist & though he recognizes/understands the anatomical/chemical workings of the heart he also believes it’s entirely possibly to die of a broken heart from love (he’s a romantic). Has made it his life’s mission to save lives and keep hearts beating in hopes they’ll find their pair – but puts in too many hours at work that he can’t seem to maintain his own relationships. Travels the world for various medical conferences and has a habit of buying exotic teas to bring back with him – his collection is astounding. Drives a low emission vehicle in hopes it’ll somehow balance out the ridiculous cars his best friend buys.

Yukimura – College student + star athlete. He’s highly skilled in martial arts & is training to compete on an Olympic level. He gets around on a red & black Suzuki motorcycle with gold rims. Once got a citation in the mail claiming he almost ran someone over with his bike. Comes from family money but is very modest about it, though he splurged on his bike when he was accepted to college on a sports scholarship. His favorite places on-campus to eat are the ones that serve food buffet style because he tends to really pack it in. He secretly feeds several of the cats that roam around where he lives & has given them all names.

Saizo – Private investigator by day, author by night. He uses a pseudonym to write combo suspense/thriller/romance novels loosely based on some of the cases he’s handled. When he catches someone actively cheating on their spouse & goes to take a picture for proof he says, “Be a good dear & smile for the camera!”- he finds the shocked expressions really round out the pictures. Owns a ridiculous amount of hair gel. Doesn’t like having guests over at his place but can’t seem to keep the annoying college kid who lives down the hall out of his apartment – he doesn’t really mind the company though, the kid’s got charm.

Masamune – Incredibly shy college student working on his degree in Animal Sciences & Biology. Hopes to one-day work as a wildlife conservationist. His college mentor is Kojuro; he often finds himself using Kojuro’s office to study instead of using the library – it’s quieter in there & nobody bothers him (plus one time he saw some guy get smacked upside the head for sneezing in the library & decided he wasn’t about that life). Was once almost run down by some annoying jock on a flashy motorcycle. Has a crush on the cute girl that works at the animal shelter he volunteers at but can’t bring himself to talk to her. Lives with his cousin who’s essentially his polar opposite.

Kojuro – Literature college professor & published poet. Has a high regard for the written word. Refuses to write any of his works on a computer & insists they all be written on paper by hand. As a result, his desk is scattered with fragments of phrases & lines on scraps of papers or post-its. For Christmas he got a small journal that fit in his pocket from his mentee so he could start to keep his ideas on him at all times & in one place.  His handwriting is absolutely atrocious & nobody can read it. Starts off every lecture with an insightful quote for his students to ponder. Isn’t a morning person – just stay away. His office has random bamboo shoots & water fountains to make noises like a babbling brook.

Hideyoshi – Graduate student of Psychology. Spends most of his time in the library – everyone thinks he’s reading & studying, but he’s really people watching & making notes for his dissertation. He has a whole section written about the analysis of some kid smacking someone for sneezing. Doesn’t have the best fashion sense, but goes for comfort more than style – wears TOMs with everything. Quick to offer unsolicited advice but nobody calls him out for it because of his easy & gentle smile. Always gets a banana pudding with his lunch. His ringtone is “Are You Gonna Be My Girl” by Jet.

Inuchiyo – College student studying Criminal Justice. Part of a fraternity – he’s a legacy. His parent’s home is next door to his childhood crush but hasn’t worked up the courage to tell her he’s in love with her & just sends death glares to anyone she’s ever dated. Once got smacked in the library for sneezing into a book on accident. Took his job as hall monitor as a kid way too seriously. Once saw some kid almost get mowed down with a motorcycle – reported the license plate & description to the campus police. Works part time at the on-campus gym as a personal trainer.

Ieyasu – In his final year of studying Pharmacology. Took courses over the summer & winter breaks to speed up his education. Works at the college campus pharmacy between classes & on weekends. Wears crocs. Acts like a total brown nose to the famous cardiologist he used to shadow prior to medical school to maintain that connection for future endeavors. Wants to create pharmaceuticals that he considers to be natural/herbal. Always smells like vanilla and sugar cookies. Rumor once spread around campus that he killed a man. Has his highlights touched up every other month.

Mitsunari – College student that refuses to tell anyone what his major is (but it’s actually Library Sciences), not because he’s trying to be mysterious, but because he doesn’t want anyone he knows loitering around the buildings he’s primarily in for his classes. Once smacked a guy across the head with his palm for sneezing into a book. Prefers taking public transit or walking to get to where he has to go. Always dresses formal casual & owns a ridiculous amount of sweaters. Volunteers to help run the children’s reading program every month.

Kenshin – He’s a curator at a museum. He has numerous degrees in Art History & enjoys restoration/preservation of the works he comes across. Often talks to the statues throughout the museum as if he expects some sort of reply from them. Is sometimes mistaken for a woman but doesn’t mind. Twirls his hair when he gets nervous. Lives above a flower boutique downtown & enjoys watering their garden in his free time. Owns numerous bottles of Gendarme 20. His landlord hates that the apartment always seems cluttered & in chaos anytime he comes by to pick up the rent. 

Shingen – Has a made career for himself as a “Men’s Life Coach.” Teaches men of varying ages how to dress, handle themselves, converse, & gain confidence. Did a stint a few years back as an exotic dancer (stripped while dressed as a sexy cowboy, saddle on stage) & he kinda misses it. Works out more often than he sleeps. Once hit on a woman he met at a museum who turned out to be a guy but still asked him out on a date anyway. Lives in a lavish studio apartment with modern contemporary furniture. Once caught some peeping tom taking his picture through the window (he lives on the 10th floor?) yelling for him to smile – so he did.

Shigezane – Goes to the University of The Undecided & has decided to major in Life. He’s charismatic & charms everyone he meets which somehow led to him becoming a male escort (is very popular with older ladies), though he rarely provides adult services unless he, “feels a spark, ya know?” (or they’re really hot). Once went to pick up his cousin from the animal shelter he volunteers at & flirted with a cute girl there when suddenly a dog started chasing him – he could have sworn he saw his cousin give the dog a treat & a pat on the head later. Has a tendency to pay for the groceries, but lets his cousin do all the cooking & steals from his plate. Watches The Bachelor/Bachelorette religiously. Calls his cousin’s satchel a “murse.”