#and my boss agrees with me! but like!! the clients are so condescending

[cute-chamomile]

Another day another having to argue with clients on behalf of people who have strong opinions but don't have to argue with the client themselves

[jaderabbitt]

Hahaha i was rewatching phantom blood and just remembered that Dio was going to be a lawyer so 👉👈 how about some Lawyer Dio Brando NSFW x shy assistant please ? 😳

your wish is my command. i loved this prompt a lot, but i will admit that i think i could’ve done a lot better with this. i couldn’t for the life of me agree on one way to execute this, so i kinda just kept writing. and writing. and now it’s 1.4k words.

haha.

oops.

hope you like it! and for the anon who asked for Bruno, don’t you worry your pretty little head, i’m working on it!

Discusses: shy!reader, fem!reader, pet names, mentions of voyeurism, NSFW, straight smut, filth

Setting down the coffee cup on Dio’s desk, you took some time to reorganize the papers and metal racks before he arrived. You always came in to the firm early to make sure that the impending work you knew was coming wouldn’t overload you. Dio had a tendency to pass off the work he couldn’t be bothered to do to you, but you guessed that’s really the reason you were hired. Though, you couldn’t for the life of you find out why you were chosen over the other, more qualified applicants that you had seen when you were waiting for your interview. Truthfully, you thought that Dio disliked you.

Sighing to yourself, you walked towards the floor to ceiling windows, looking down at the city below you. Even though the United Kingdom was known for its permanent rainy days, you were pleasantly surprised to see the sun rising. You thought of how Dio would look with the sunny backdrop, and the vision in your mind made you blush. His blonde hair would be golden in the rays of the sun, his blood red eyes darkened with lust, that unwavering smirk with incisors that were a little too sharp.

It gave you shudders, but before you resigned to stop thinking about your boss so dirtily, you felt a hand on your lower back. Squealing in surprise, your face flushed quickly with heat when you saw the very person you had been having nasty thoughts about.

“M-Mr. Brando! I didn’t hear you come in!” you managed to stammer out, but it only served to make his lips curl up deviously. “Stating the obvious, now are we?” he said, and though the statement sounded condescending, his tone was anything but. It was laced with playfulness, something you weren’t expecting to come from your new boss. His hand laid a little too close to your bottom, but it was gone as quick as it came. You tried not to think much of the touch, but you couldn’t help the spark of hope and desire that came from thinking it was intentional.

The day continued on like any other, with you sneaking glances at Dio, and him smirking when he raised his eyes to catch you. You always quickly looked somewhere else, desperately trying to seem inconspicuous, but you ultimately failed every time.

After receiving a phone call, you buzzed a client in to meet with Dio. You felt a slight pang of disappointment that you were no longer going to be alone with him for a while, but you quickly dispersed that thought. Instead, you made sure that tea was available for the meeting, and quickly debriefed him on what to expect from the client. You were expecting the usual grunt and nod of acknowledgement, but instead you received a gentle kiss on the back of your hand and a “thank you, darling.”

You almost fainted then and there.

Finally, the end of your shift was coming to a close, but you tended to stay a bit longer to finish up anyways. You were usually alone on your floor, and it served for a great working environment. Only, tonight, Dio decided he’d accompany you.

What luck you had.

Seeing him remove his suit blazer and roll up his dress shirt sleeves had ignited a flame in your core, and you weren’t sure if you’d even be able to focus on your work anymore. You were so occupied with trying to busy yourself and take your mind off of your unnervingly hot boss across the room, you didn’t notice him sneaking up behind you.

“Did you think I wouldn’t notice how you’ve been looking at me all day, love?” he whispered gruffly into your ear, his carefully manicured hands coming up to rest at your shoulders. You found yourself naturally easing into his touch before realizing the situation you were in.

“I d-don’t know what you’re talking about, sir…” you meekly responded, earning you a deep chuckle and a chair spin so that you were facing him. “Oh, but I think you do. In fact, I would wager that you did it on purpose,” he growled out, crimson eyes darkened with lust, narrowed at your squirming body. Dio made a show of looking you up and down and licking his lips before finally settling on your own. He leaned in and captured your lips with his own, and before you could even think about reciprocating, there were hands roughly separating your thighs. You gasped in surprise, and it allowed him access to explore within your mouth with his tongue. When he pulled off, there was a line of saliva connecting the both of you, and the grips on your thighs seemed to get harder when he glanced down at the crevice between.

“You dare lie to me when you’re this wet? Tsk, tsk. You should know better, you little minx.” 

You went to protest, but you couldn’t find any words when a finger trailed a line back and forth on your clothed cunt, making a squelching sound on each pass through. You bit on the knuckle of your index finger to suppress the moans Dio elicited through his actions. Trying to coerce those sounds out of you, he hiked your skirt up and thrusted two of his large fingers underneath your panties and into your dripping hole. You squealed and moaned out before you could catch yourself, easily becoming embarrassed and covering your heated face with your hands.

“There we go, kitten. That wasn’t so hard, was it?” he affirmed, picking up the pace of his fingers and stretching you out, readying you for something much larger. Your whimpers didn’t go unnoticed, and when you peeked between your fingers, you noticed how hard he was against his slacks, and just how big the bulge seemed to be. You moaned simply at the sight, and once more at the feeling of his fingers leaving your insides.

Dio took his time in licking his fingers, humming at the taste and smirking at your shocked expression. Impatient as he is, he swiftly unzipped himself from his slacks, and you were left to come to terms that you would soon be torn in two by your boss. You couldn’t help but stare at the monster that resided between his legs, but were interrupted by the hand lifting your chin so that you made eye contact with him.

“My eyes are up here, pet.”

He laughed at the way you pouted, but it was quickly erased by how your panties were yanked out from under your skirt, and you couldn’t help but gape at Dio when he pocketed them. In the blink of an eye, you were pulled further down the chair, legs spread to the point where they were touching the armrests, and you screamed out when you felt Dio plunge his cock straight into your cunt. “Hush now, pet. You wouldn’t want to alert the rest of the building now, would you?” he groaned out, and that’s when you realized he was only halfway in, as he seemed to sink further and further into you. The walls of your pussy clenched around him, and he scolded you, saying that you needed to relax, lest he actually tear you apart.

When he bottomed out, you swore you could feel him touching your cervix, and you were reduced to a mess of moans and whines. Suddenly, his hand was around your neck as if it were a choker, applying pressure as he started roughly pounding into you. You couldn’t do anything but scream silent screams, your mouth hanging open and your hole full of him. Dio seemed as if this didn’t even make him break a sweat, easily breaking you apart with his cock.

It didn’t take long for you to feel the coil in your lower half, and he knew it was coming. You held your own thighs spread apart as the hand that wasn’t around your throat reached down you swipe back and forth at your clit. He rubbed circles into it, and you gasped out his name. “Say it again. Scream who you belong to!” he growled out, and you did exactly that. You screamed out his name in pure ecstasy, climaxing at that moment. But, that didn’t make him falter. He continued ramming his cock into your cunt, overstimulating you to the point where it was becoming painful. You were relieved to feel him still, as deep as he could possibly be. You bit your lip and whimpered at the feeling of his warm spurts of cum painting your insides. All you heard in your post-orgasm haze was your own panting, unknowing that this was just the appetizer.

He was going to take you as a full course meal.

[daily-dose-of-imagines]

ᴍᴏʟᴛᴇɴ ꜱᴛᴀʀᴇ | 𝘏𝘢𝘪𝘬𝘺𝘶𝘶!! Hitmen AU! [Kuroo x F!Reader] ɴꜱꜰᴡ

Just a short little drabble with sly boi Kuroo~ ^^

I’m warning you all now, this is-- uhm very very nsfw SKSKSK Idk what my mind was thinking when I wrote this but uh--- yEaH

TW; Choking, Manhandling, Possessive Behavior

» » Admin Ko

»»————-　♔　————-««

You couldn’t remember the last time you were left in rather...provocative situation. Normally, whenever Kenma would assign you missions, they were quick and easy. Nothing like the one you currently faced. How you found yourself teamed up with your boss, you probably would never find out. Yet here you are. 

It was supposed to be a simple ‘meeting’ with a client who had not only failed to pay off the debt they owed for purchasing your teams services, but was actively trying to run and hide from the prying golden eyes of your boss. And honestly, you couldn’t blame them. 

Despite being a rather lax and understanding boss, Kuroo showed none of those traits when he was on the field. The movements he made, the words he spoke, and the condescending look in his eyes made anyone freeze if they were placed before the terrifying man. The look of a predator.

“Look, I know you’re rather stupid. What, with running your 2 ‘successful’ businesses and what not. But you’re quite bold in thinking that I wouldn’t see this coming~.” 

A sinister smirk then stretched across the taller man’s face as he kicked the client from the chair down to the floor. A heavy leather boot immediately being pressed into the frightened individual’s chest as your boss leaned forward. 

“And...to think, you’d try to convince one of my teammates to join your pathetic workplace? It’s honestly laughable.”

You froze. It never occurred to you that Kuroo had actually heard the conversation between the client and you. Granted this was a conversation from a previous warning visit. But to hear the harsh and possessive tone laced in his voice sent chills down your spine as you couldn’t help but become a bit flustered at the boss’s attitude. 

Why was he so worked up anyway? As far as you were aware, the others that you worked with had faced similar situations as you. So...why exactly did he have to say something like that? 

Deciding to ignore the way your stomach flipped at the sight of your boss, you went to put a hand on his shoulder in an effort to calm him down. After all, you both still needed to get the money. If not that, then information as to where you and your team could inquire to next about the fees accumulated from this client.

“Boss. Ease up a bit,”

You began, hoping to divert the irritated male’s attention onto you. Though when it looked like it was going to work, the man pinned on the ground just had to speak.

“Glad to see that besides having a nice body, she has an actual brain---”

The words died on the man’s lips as Kuroo added more pressure. His eyes set ablaze as an almost animistic growl escaped his throat. 

“Shut the fuck up.”

An uneasy feeling came over you as you pulled back from the other. A look of wariness crossing your features as Kuroo refused to even spare you a glance. The man beneath him seemed to be suffocating from the pressure of Kuroo’s weight and his piercing stare.

“...Step outside (y/n). I’ll be with you in a moment.”

A promise of a lecture most likely, was the first thought that came to your mind as you gave him a nod before venturing outside. If only it was actually a lecture you’d be receiving. Though of course you couldn’t predict the future. All you could do at the moment, was wish that it would be over soon and you wouldn’t be assigned on another mission with the panther like man.

»»————-　ᴛɪᴍᴇ ♔ ꜱᴋɪᴘ　————-««

An irritated sigh, and a quick glance to your watch as you watched another hour of your life go by with you just staring at the discolored and poster ridden wall before you. As far as you were aware, any sort of warning meetings with Kuroo ended within the hour and the money would’ve been retrieved with a call for a clean up crew to be on the way.

Though why was it taking longer than usual? Before you could even begin to theorize what was going on, the door opened and out stepped the man in question. An oddly calm look on his face as he fixed his leather gloves briefly. 

“Did you get the---” Before you could even finish your sentence, you were slammed against the wall. A cry of pain escaping you as you tightly closed your eyes. Your heart began pounding in your chest as you tried to understand the situation before you. Though it was hard to concentrate with the ringing in your head and the sudden breathlessness you felt. Were...were you being choked?

“How many times?”

The words came out fuzzy to you as you let out a breathless, “Wha---?”

“How many times did that piece of shit speak to you like that?!”

Confused, you could only weakly grasp at his arm as you blearily looked up at him. Though again you fell breathless as his eyes seared straight into your soul. Practically burning his mark on it as he kept you pinned to the wall. 

“I-I...B-Boss... K-Kuroo, I can’t---!” 

Your adrenaline was kicking in, your heart hammering against your chest as you felt the coil in your gut tighten as you cursed yourself. This wasn’t the situation to be getting turned on! Yes, your boss looked incredibly hot right now, but you literally were going to die if he couldn’t control his emotions!

Suddenly realizing what he was doing, he let go. Watching your chest heave as you gulped down lungfuls of air. A strange high coming off of you as you shakily met his gaze. His own boring straight into you as he seemed to still want his answer from you. 

Once regaining a sense of clarity, you collected your thoughts as you finally spoke. A slight rasp to your voice as you internally winced at how your voice sounded.

“He...it was every time I visited...sir.”

A sharp click of his tongue and a string of curses came under his breath as he closed his eyes briefly. You stood there, awkwardly waiting as you tried to quell the shake in your legs from the near death experience before you were jolted out of your thoughts when a large hand clamped down onto your wrist. The hold unrelenting as you were suddenly tugged down the alleyway.

“B-Boss?” 

Utterly confused, you could only follow him blindly as he didn’t speak the rest of the way towards the now undisclosed location. Within moments, you found yourself in front of a an apartment door. The area where it was being much more higher class than the previous location you had been. Though, before you could even question where you both were the taller male unlocked the door and tugged you in.

Putting two and two together, you realized you were in Kuroo’s apartment. Startled by this, you went to ask him why he brought you here. Instead, you were pinned to his door as his lips were suddenly on yours. 

A messy and dominant aura coming from the male as he slipped his tongue into your mouth. Taking advantage of your shocked state to get a much needed fix of your taste before he slowly pulled back. 

“You have no idea how much it pisses me off to hear the girl I fucking love is getting treated like some ditsy whore.”

The words punched into your chest as your cheeks flushed at the words your boss said. He...loves you? Of course you had a crush on him. You were sure any of the rookies who joined the Nekoma team could agree on having a crush on the mischievous leader.

Though for you in particular, you grew to have more of a crush on the taller male after witnessing his personality and his mannerisms towards children and those in need. It warmed your heart that besides being a cruel and unrelenting figure in the dark world you both lived in, he still had a kind heart.

Before you could even think, you took this chance into your own hands as you suddenly grabbed at his jacket. A sharp tug and your lips meshed with his in a messy, yet fiery dance. His hands found their way around your waist before suddenly lifting you up into his arms as you let out a startled gasp.

Once again, taking this little change in your actions, he let his tongue dive into your mouth. Exploring and savoring the addicting taste that was you. You let out a soft groan at his play as you were overwhelmed by him. His scent, his touch, his voice. Everything about him had your body reacting in ways you didn’t think were possible.

The next thing you knew, he was pressing kisses against your neck, his hands roughly holding you up by your thighs as he gave them a nice squeeze. Then suddenly, you were thrown onto his bed. Soft black sheets enveloped your form as you looked up at your boss. A breathless look on your face as you watched with wide eyes as he began to slowly strip. A sort of show as his piercing gold eyes never left your wide (e/c). 

“K-Kuro--”

“Tetsuro.”

His lust filled voice cut you off as he threw his button down haphazardly onto the floor before crawling towards you. That predatory look in his eyes once again returning as he took in your form beneath him. It was mesmerizing. The way your hair fell against your skin and his sheets. The flushed look that covered your cheeks. The way your eyes held his own in a never ending game of cat and mouse.

“....Tetsuro...”

You tested the name, your lips playing with the syllables as he let out a groan. The way you said his name sending heat straight down to his already strained pants as you slowly brought your arms up to wrap around his neck. Your fingers toying with his hair as you suddenly dropped a sultry gaze to him.

“I want you to wreck me...make me yours. Prove to me that what you said wasn’t a lie...”

And almost as if a switch was turned on, the man above you ravaged you almost immediately. He dove for your neck, already making claim to the soft skin and leaving his marks wherever accessible. his hands began to claw at your clothes. Roughly tugging and desperately peeling the layers away to touch your skin. To get a feel for you. 

The gasps and moans that escaped your reddened and swollen lips only urged him to explore more of you as your clothes were tossed into a pile on his bedroom floor. Mingling with his own abandoned ones as he continued kissing lower and lower until he was at your dripping entrance. A seductive grin formed on his face as he grabbed your thighs. The feel of his calloused hands sending another wave of heat into you as you grasped at the sheets beneath you.

“F-Fuck TetsuRO!”

A sharp cry came from you as your eyes widened in utter surprise as your boss began to suck and bite at the sensitive and supple skin of your inner thighs. Already you could feel your eyes water at the stimulation as you trembled underneath his hold. 

“Stay still kitten...”

A purr came from the male as his warm breath fanned against your dripping folds. A taunting smirk on his lips as he forced your thighs apart, and the next thing you knew you were crying and begging for release as his tongue delved deep into you. Taunting and teasing every little nook and cranny that he could reach. 

Your noises only fueling him further as he kept you from grinding your hips down against his face as you pleaded for him to stop teasing and to give you that sweet release. Of course that never came as he continued to absolutely decimate you with his tongue. The sweet little spots you had hidden away being prodded and teased at as he relished in your desperate sounds. 

And just when you thought you were about to cum, the ever mischievous male pulled back as you let out a sob of frustration. Your flustered and tear stained face only further prompted him to lean forward and capture your lips into another kiss as you let out a small moan as you tasted not only him but yourself on his tongue. 

The action making you even more embarrassed before you finally decided to take matters into your own hands. If this was the game your boss decided to play. Then so be it. You weren’t going to be the only one to suffer tonight.

Without warning, you pulled him in closer, stealing every breath he took as he let out a low and throaty moan at your sudden boldness. Though the sounds escalated the moment you flipped him onto his back. A victorious grin now on your face as he looked up at you with surprise in those golden irises. 

“I’m not the only one being teased tonight, tiger...”

A seductive smirk graced your features as you fumbled with his pants briefly. His cock straining desperately against the cloth of his boxers before you pulled both layers loose. The pair being lost in the pile of forgotten clothes on the floor as you leaned over to his nightstand. A teasing wink being sent his way as you grabbed one of the condoms he had stashed away. With practiced ease, you slipped the condom on before you positioned yourself over his weeping cock.  His face suddenly becoming flustered, as he attempted to stop you before you slowly worked his tip against your aching folds. A desperate moan coming from the both of you as you struggled to keep him from bucking up and stretching you too quickly. 

Thankfully, you managed to keep his grinding hips down as he let out a breathless string of curses as you continued to ease and work your way onto him. Though the more you did the more shaky and hazy your eyes became as you couldn’t help but let out a wanton moan at how he filled you up. Your walls clenching around him tightly as he let out a sharp curse and a strong buck of his hips.

The action catching you off guard as you squealed. Your hands pressing against his lower abdomen to steady yourself as you gave him a sharp glare. Amused, he let out a breathy chuckle before letting our another colorful string of curses and moans as you began to move. Your body taking the reigns as you began to ride the man beneath you until he was a desperate moaning mess.

Though just as you thought he was about to break, his hands shot towards your own hips as he began to match with your speed. Your flushed cheeks turning even darker as his gaze became practically liquid gold as he watching you bounce on his cock. The both of you nearing your limits as both gold and (e/c) meshed, drowning one another in each other’s hypnotic stares before you both came with a loud moan. 

Suddenly you fell forward, collapsing against the sweaty male beneath you as the musk of sex and sweat filled the room. Groaning, you let your eyes slowly flutter closed as Tetsuro pulled out of you. Giving himself a moment to catch his breath before he turned, lazily wrapping an arm around you as he carefully tugged the messy sheet off and onto the floor before wrapping the both of you in the blanket. His molten stare now basking over your sleeping features as he pressed a kiss to the side of your head before he too succumbed to the exhaustion.

A soft whisper danced into your ear before the both of you finally fell asleep though, and it brought a subconscious smile to you as darkness brought you into it’s soothing embrace.

“...I love you (y/n)...”

[inyournightmares97]

Ultimatum (Part 2)

Park Jinyoung is a master negotiator. He’s used to preying on people’s weaknesses and manipulating them to get his way. So he can’t understand you; a lawyer who sees the world in black and white, as either good or bad. Conflict is inevitable.

But if the two of you can just set aside your differences, perhaps you can perform miracles together.

Word Count: 3.6k+

Warnings: Angst, office!au, enemies to lovers!au. Some language.

Part 1: In Which You Win

Part 2: In Which He Wins

Part 3: In Which the Common Enemy Appears

Part 4: In Which You Work Together

Part 5: In Which Nobody Wins (coming soon)

Part 6: In Which Everybody Wins (coming soon) 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was like taking candy from a child. 

Cruel, but easy. 

“Do you know what this is, Yugyeom?” Jinyoung asked with a handsome smile. He leaned against Yugyeom’s desk gracefully, his expensive suit making the wooden table look dull in comparison. Jinyoung held a small sheaf of papers in his hand. “I just received this from IT. I think you’ll find it makes for very interesting reading.”

Yugyeom didn’t look up. You had just left the office for a meeting and he really didn’t want to deal with Park Jinyoung in your absence. 

“Huh. Maybe put it down there and I’ll take a look at it when I have time,” Yugyeom muttered, trying to focus on the work he was supposed to be doing. He could feel Jinyoung’s dark eyes piercing into his skull. 

“Are you sure? I think you want to read it now.”

“Not really.”

Jinyoung raised an eyebrow. “I see. You’d like me to leave it here for your boss to find when she comes back? Because I’m sure she’d be fascinated to go through your internet browsing history. There are some real gems in here.”

Yugyeom recoiled. “What?”

“The more recent ones are a delight. Let me see. ‘How to ask a girl out’ and ‘is it okay to date an intern’ and pick-up lines in Japanese. Is Hana Japanese? How ignorant of me, I never bothered to ask her. Oh! But I see if we go a couple months back then you enjoyed one particularly late night at the office alone, hmm? On 17th October at 11pm? Sounds like a wild ride. Busty brunettes-”

Yugyeom leapt to his feet and snatched the sheaf of papers, crumpling them up instantly. His cheeks and ears turned a bright red and he looked around furtively. Luckily you had stepped out for a meeting and Youngjae, the only other member of the Legal department, had gone to the cafeteria. 

“Stop it. Please. Where did you even get that?” Yugyeom pleaded. 

“I have friends in IT, Yugyeom,” Jinyoung explained as Yugyeom desperately ripped up the papers and tossed them into the bin under his desk. “I also have more copies of that.”

“I suppose you mean Mark Tuan. He’s not supposed to be releasing employee data like that. It’s against company policy for IT to disclose personal data to employees from other departments who don’t have clearance,” Yugyeom ranted, his brown eyes looking panicked. “It’s a breach of confidential information. So you can’t use that evidence against me because you obtained it illegally and without clearance-”

Jinyoung chuckled as he folded his arms across his chest. “Yugyeom. You poor child. You don’t understand how the world works, do you? I don’t need clearance to accidentally send this information to the rest of the office. What’s the worst that could happen to me? A formal reprimand, maybe a warning. But you… you’re going to face a lot worse.”

Yugyeom swallowed nervously. “Like what?”

Jinyoung leaned closer and lowered his voice to a whisper. “Like Hana finding out about your taste for brunettes even before you’ve asked her on a date.”

“Fuck.”

“What do you think? Does this seem like a risk you want to be taking?”

Yugyeom clenched his fists with hatred. “What do you want?”

Jinyoung grinned despicably and rolled up his sleeves. 

“That’s more like it. Let’s have a negotiation, shall we? It’s what I do best, after all.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Yugyeom had been acting suspiciously silent all afternoon. 

“Are you okay?” you asked him with a kind smile. 

The young law graduate had only been working under you for a year, but his bright attitude and easy-going personality were the best things about him. Yugyeom could be clumsy and careless but he never lost his smile. Ever since you’d returned from your meeting, though, he had only been giving you one-word answers and avoiding your gaze. 

“Fine,” he muttered. 

“Are you sure? You’ve been pretty silent since I got back from my meeting.”

“Maybe something I ate at lunch didn’t agree with me,” he mumbled. Yugyeom’s face was white and you patted his back sympathetically. Poor kid. He’d been working hard with the big restructuring coming up soon. 

“I’m leaving early today since I have to go visit my Mom. You should go home too. And drink some soup,” you suggested as you packed up your belongings. “We’ve been overworking ourselves. Nobody seems to appreciate that we’re the only thing standing between this company and a massive lawsuit.” you complained. Jinyoung’s despicable face popped up in your mind. “How dare he call our job a mere formality. That arrogant bastard.”

Yugyeom hiccuped nervously. 

You smiled at him. “Here, drink some water. I’m guessing Park Jinyoung didn’t come by today?”

“W-what? No. Why? Did you see him?” 

“Of course not. I was at my meeting most of the day. I assumed he’d come down here and try to bother you about the term sheet again,” you replied. It wasn’t like Jinyoung to give up easily. “I’m surprised he hasn’t done anything yet. He only has two days until his deadline. He must have some plan?”

Yugyeom forced a smile. “Maybe you scared him.”

“Maybe,” you mused. “Anyway, I’m leaving. Go home, Yugyeom. Get some rest.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I need you to personally review the documents relating to the opening of our new office in Busan,” the CEO told you. “It’s important that nothing goes wrong during this restructuring. We need it to work in order to cut costs here at the Seoul office, but if we have legal problems then we could end up spending more than we save.”

You nodded, clutching the files to your chest. “Right. I understand, sir. We’ll take care of it.”

“I know I can count on you. Okay. That’s all for today, I have another meeting in a few minutes. Dismissed.”

You walked out of the CEOs office with a sigh, wondering how you had just been piled with more work than ever when you’d really wanted to take a few days off this week. Things were getting tougher. Your mind was preoccupied as you walked and you collided with a hard chest covered in an expensive suit. 

“Hello there,” Jinyoung’s deep voice greeted, sounding amused as he reached out to help you straighten up. You looked into his dark eyes. The man’s hands were soft and warm on your skin, unlike his personality.

You frowned at him. “What are you doing here?”

“I have a meeting with the CEO,” he informed you smugly. 

“About what?”

“None of your business. Run along and go pretend to be important elsewhere,” he told you airily. 

You narrowed your eyes at him. Something wasn’t right. Park Jinyoung shouldn’t be this happy. There was a sparkle in his dark eyes and even the way the corner of his lips was curved up suggested that he knew something you didn’t. 

Something smelled fishy. 

“How are you so calm? I don’t understand. Your client expects to be signing the agreement tomorrow and you haven’t even got a term sheet approved,” you reminded him. You’d checked with Hana and she had confirmed that Jinyoung would be meeting with the client tomorrow afternoon. What was he going to take to them? 

“You know what? I think I’ll manage.”

“Manage how?” you demanded. 

“There’s no fun in me telling you that, now is there?” Jinyoung asked. He coolly ran his fingers through his hair. “Keep your schedule vacant tomorrow. I imagine the entire office will be having a party to celebrate me securing the biggest deal of the year. It would be a shame if you missed it.”

“I can’t miss a party that won’t happen,” you snapped. 

“Sure, let’s see who wins this one. Spoiler alert: it’s me. It’s always me,” Jinyoung informed you with a pearly-white smile. He patted you on the head in a condescending manner that made your blood boil (how dare he: you were a fully grown woman!) and then calmly walked past you to enter the CEOs office. 

What was happening? 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At 8:34 pm on Tuesday night, Kim Yugyeom burst into tears and confessed everything. 

You weren't surprised, only angry. It was just like Park Jinyoung to prey on a person's weakness. He had no shame or remorse, possessed no sense of right and wrong. He didn't even have basic decency, how could you have expected better from him? 

“Hey, look. It’s going to be fine,” Youngjae tried to console Yugyeom gently, handing him a tissue to wipe his face. Most of the office had already left for the day but Yugyeom’s tears were still running like a waterfall. The poor boy was terrified.  

“I-it’s not fine. I’m going to be fired for having approved a term sheet that was clearly against company policy-” Yugyeom whimpered. 

“Nobody has to know!” Youngjae insisted. He turned and looked at you, expecting you to reassure Yugyeom. “Nobody has to know, right? Park Jinyoung won’t say anything because his ass is on the line. There’s no reason for senior management to read the agreement thoroughly. I’m sure the CEO will just sign it since it’s such a huge deal for our company. We’ll be fine for now. It’s a seven-year contract so really, it’ll be years before anyone begins to find any problems.”

You leaned back in your chair and sighed. “Do you guys know why the company doesn’t offer sub-licensing rights as a rule?”

Youngjae blinked. “I mean, yeah-”

“It’s because the software we’re licensing out is ours. If the client is allowed to license it to other people, or sub-license, then why would anyone come to us to buy it? We’d never make sales ourselves because the client would essentially be selling our product at a cheaper rate than us. We'd lose customers, literally. Sub-licensing puts our company at a disadvantage in the long run. But Park Jinyoung doesn’t care about the long run. He doesn’t even care whether this deal will benefit the company. He just wanted the personal glory of being the first guy in Sales to secure a ten million-dollar deal.” 

Yugyeom sniffled. “I’m sorry…”

You sighed and patted him on the back. You weren’t happy with Yugyeom, but the boy was already so miserable that it seemed heartless to scold him further. 

“Let’s call it a day, Yugyeom. We’re going to have to listen to Park Jinyoung gloating tomorrow, so we need our rest.”

“You’re not going to tell the CEO?” he asked hopefully. 

You bit your lip. Every part of you was screaming to go to the CEO now and tell him that Jinyoung’s contract grossly violated company policy, but it was too late. Yugyeom’s signature was already on the sheet. The poor boy would lose his job and you didn’t want to be directly responsible for that. You gave him a small smile. 

“I’m not going to tell. But the problem might get traced back to you someday, Yugyeom. I won’t lie. I’m not sure I can save you from that.”

“I-I know.”

“How about we all go get some pizza? Let’s invite Hana too. The poor girl can never join us when Jinyoung’s around,” you said brightly, in an attempt to dissipate the dull atmosphere. “Yugyeom, why don’t you go over to Sales and let her know?”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Park Jinyoung probably rehearsed that despicable smile of his. 

You could picture it in your mind; Jinyoung standing in front of his mirror at home and practicing his pearly-white smile, checking to see which angles were most flattering. Jinyoung’s smile was made for the cameras, which was convenient because a press conference was held on Wednesday afternoon to announce that the two companies had entered into an enormous deal. 

You watched in silent disgust as Jinyoung smiled handsomely for the cameras and shook hands with the senior management. 

“Looks like they’re organizing a party to celebrate the deal,” Jinyoung announced loudly to Jackson as he walked past your desk later that evening, proudly carrying the small gift that the client had given him as a thank you. He was addressing his co-worker, but his dark eyes twinkled in your direction. “There’ll be lots of free booze. We’re going to need a designated driver.”

Jackson laughed. “Don’t look at me! I intend to get sloshed!”

“Oh, I’m sure someone from Legal will volunteer,” Jinyoung replied airily. “I can think of a few teetotallers in that department.”

What a prick. Like hell you would be driving his drunken ass home. 

Park Jinyoung gave you a cheeky smile and hurried past. Even the sight of his shapely posterior was not enough to calm you down. How did the man wake up every morning and live with himself? He had no shame. 

You paused for a few moments to visualise his head puffing up to three times its present size and then exploding into a billion tiny pieces, one for every dollar he’d made off the deal. The prospect made you feel marginally better and you were able to get back to work. 

You’d get your revenge. 

Although maybe not quite yet. 

“Are you all coming to the party tonight?” Hana asked hopefully, when she stopped by the Legal area on her return journey from getting Jackson coffee. Her question was addressed to all three of you but her gaze was on Yugyeom. He had been miserable all morning. His shoulders were slumped as he shuffled through some documents half-heartedly. 

“Of course we’re coming,” you told her. 

Yugyeom blinked. “Actually-”

“We’re coming. We did some work on that deal too, we deserve to be there,” you replied. You gave Yugyeom a firm look. “You’re not going to avoid it. If nothing else, at least enjoy the free drinks. Why would you refuse when the company is paying?”

“Right…” Yugyeom mumbled. 

“Can I come with you guys?” Hana asked shyly. “I don’t really want to go with the rest of the Sales team. Mr. Park is being offered a promotion, and it’s all he can talk about. I’m getting kind of tired of congratulating him on it whenever he brings it up.”

You flinched. “A promotion? Jinyoung?”

“Well… it’s not a promotion exactly. But since he’s such a good negotiator, the CEO wants him to help the Finance team make pitches to potential investors for our company. I guess that’s a step up from Sales, right?” she asked. 

Holy shit. They're sending him to our investors now? That was no small matter. Being in charge of finding clients was one thing, but to let Jinyoung talk to the company’s investors was pretty much the highest recognition they could have given him.

No wonder he had looked so pleased. 

"Of course you can come with us," you told her kindly, trying not to let your bitterness show. "I'm sure you need a break from all that toxicity up in Sales. We'll meet you after work, I think the restaurant they booked is within walking distance from here."

"Thanks!" Hana said brightly. "I'll see you!"

None of you were in a mood to celebrate Park Jinyoung's 'contributions' to the company but you decided that you would go. Hopefully a couple of drinks and some time spent with Hana would cheer Yugyeom up. Park Jinyoung could only be in one place at a time, so it should be easy to avoid him, right? 

------------------------------------------------------

It wasn't. 

Park Jinyoung seemed to actively follow you around the party. Youngjae left to hang out with his friends in IT and after the first half hour, Yugyeom and Hana found a private spot on a couch to chat with their cocktails. They looked cozy and you didn't want to disturb them, so you just stuck to the walls and smiled at people politely.  

Maybe you needed more friends. 

Then again, you’d never been one for socializing at work. You worked well with your team, sure, but you didn’t know much about their personal lives. And you didn’t spend hours in the cafeteria chatting with people from other departments. You had a pleasant working relationship with most people but you didn’t have any friends in this company. 

Oh well. 

You’d rather be alone than manipulate people the way Jinyoung did. 

You were just beginning to wonder if you could make an excuse to go home when you spotted a familiar smirk in the crowd. Park Jinyoung made his way over to you, a glass of whisky in one hand. He looked incredibly attractive. He’d unbuttoned the first two buttons on his shirt and his suit jacket was missing. Jinyoung’s hair was messy, and his skin flushed from the alcohol. 

“Well,” he greeted you with a smirk. “You must be the only person in the room who hasn’t congratulated me tonight. Even Yugyeom did it, although he squeezed my hand a little harder than he should have. I think you’re rubbing off on him.”

You said nothing, merely glared. 

“Oooooh, the stink eye. How terrifying,” he replied sarcastically. “Fine, don’t congratulate me. Oh! But would you mind driving me and Jackson home tonight? Everyone’s getting drunk and we can’t seem to find a ride. You don’t drink much at these kind of parties, do you?”

You held a hand out to stop a passing waiter and took two shots of hard liquor from him, one in each hand. Without breaking eye contact with Jinyoung you drank both of them in a single gulp and then set them down on the counter. Your head spun; but Jinyoung’s jaw fell slack and that was enough for you. 

“Ah, I see. You are drinking then.”

“Surprising,” you replied with a sneer, “that the man who can negotiate a ten million-dollar deal is too cheap to just take a cab home.”

Jinyoung scoffed. “Cheap? Me?”

“Oh, am I wrong?”

“You are, as a matter of fact,” he replied. The corner of his lips turned up. “I’ll prove it to you. Let me buy you a drink right now. Choose anything you want from the bar. Not the free drinks they’re handing out for our party, but the expensive stuff on the menu.”

“I wouldn’t touch a drink you bought me with a ten-foot pole,” you snapped. 

Jinyoung put a hand on his chest, looking offended. “What? What kind of a man do you think I am?”

“The kind who blackmails an innocent kid with his internet search history into signing a contract that he could be fired for having approved. Do you not think about the consequences of your actions, Park Jinyoung? Do you just go about the world doing whatever you please for your own benefit?”

Jinyoung’s eyes narrowed. “Of course. Who else do my actions need to benefit?”

“Unbelievable.”

“What?” he demanded. “Nobody’s ever done anything for me. I’ve gotten everything in this world through my own hard work. You think I haven’t been stepped on or cheated? Go ahead. Worship your laws and your ethics and your fucking company policy all you want. Those things have never helped anyone. We’re all responsible for taking care of our own asses, and no rulebook can change that.”

“You’re selfish and disgusting.”

“I’m happy.”

“Are you really? How do you live with yourself? It’s lonely at the top, Park Jinyoung.”

Jinyoung scoffed. His eyes looked around the room proudly. “Lonely? This party is being celebrated for my achievements. I’ve been congratulated by every single person here. I’m getting a raise and I’m about to be promoted. Do I look lonely? You’re the one who doesn’t have any friends here. All you do is act like a teacher’s pet and preach your moral superiority. It’s annoying.”

You flinched. “What?”

“It’s true, isn’t it? Nobody likes a goody-two-shoes. This isn’t primary school. There are no prizes for following the rules. Grow up.”

“I cannot believe your nerve.”

“No, you just can’t believe that your stupid company policy was wrong and that I found a better way to handle things on my own.”

“On your own? You blackmailed a kid! He could lose his job! And why? To secure that precious ten million-dollar deal? That deal is going to hurt the company in the long run and you knew it from the start! Not a single person benefits from this entire manipulative mess except for you!” you snapped. 

Jinyoung blinked. “Then go tell on me.”

“Excuse me?”

“Go on, teacher’s pet. Be a tattletale. Go tell the CEO. I’ll lose my job. Yugyeom will lose his job. And your precious company will be saved from the big, bad sublicensing term. I dare you to do it,” he challenged you. 

Your fists clenched. For a moment, you pictured yourself punching Park Jinyoung in the face, or throwing a martini onto his expensive shirt. How dare he create a problem and challenge you to fix it? How dare he pretend that he was right after his childish and selfish behaviour? You stared at him in disgust. 

“I hate you,” you snapped. 

Jinyoung smirked. “Are you sure? Or do you maybe just hate yourself? Because you’re so proud of always following the company policy and being a stickler for the rules but you can’t even bring yourself to tell the truth. You can fool yourself that you’re better than me all you want. But you’re complicit in this whole deal.”

“Fuck you.”

He chuckled. “What?”

“Fuck. You, Park Jinyoung,” you hissed as you turned to leave. “I can’t even look at you.”

“Are you sure?” Jinyoung called after you with a delighted laugh, as you hurried away. If you stayed then you would surely hit him, and you didn’t want to do that. “Because there’s a rumour around work that you can’t stop looking at my butt!”

You turned back to stare at him in disbelief. What? 

Jinyoung simply grinned. His dark eyes were twinkling mischievously and he lifted the hand carrying his drink to show off his forearm below his rolled-up sleeves. Jinyoung’s dark hair fell into his eyes, and there was something extremely kissable about those plump lips of his as he mouthed the words that made your blood boil. 

I win.

----------------------------------------

[wordsintimeandspace]

Better With You (1/6)

Due to a petty feud between their respective department heads, Crowley and Aziraphale have been hiding their friendship for months. When they’re suddenly stuck in lockdown amidst a pandemic, Crowley is not coping well. Thankfully, Aziraphale is there for him - but their changing relationship means that keeping secrets from their bosses only becomes more of a challenge.

Crowley/Aziraphale, rated M (for chapter 4). Read on tumblr or AO3.

Crowley stared down at the pen he was balancing between his fingers, and imaged all the countless ways he could use it to get Gabriel to shut up right this second. For once he was glad that Gabriel was usually too self-absorbed to pay any attention to a code monkey like him - he had no doubt that not even his sunglasses were hiding his murderous fantasies, if the concerned glances Aziraphale kept shooting at him every now and then were anything to go by.

“So,” Gabriel finally concluded, clasping his hands in front of his chest, “if you could get that feature done by Friday, that would be great. The client is waiting.”

His condescending smile made Crowley’s blood boil, and Beelzebub let out an angry buzzing beside him. For a second Crowley thought they would leap over the conference table to strangle Gabriel until the bloody smile was finally gone from his irritating face. Crowley would pay good money to see that, but instead Beelzebub just shot up from their chair and slammed their fists down on the table.

“Absolutely not,” Beelzebub snarled. “That’s impozzible. Do you have any idea how much work that is if you don’t consider it at the beginning of a project?!”

Gabriel let out a huff, but otherwise didn’t falter. “Come on,” he said casually, as if he wasn’t just confronted with the fury of one of the most feared people in their company. “The lot of you down there in engineering should be a bit more flexible.”

“And the lot of you in client relations should actually do your job,” Beelzebub hissed. “You discuss these parts with the client right at the beginning, not one week before the deadline.”

“Listen, the client is the highest power in this company, and if they want this feature, they’re going to get it.”

Beelzebub apparently didn’t have an answer to that, because the client was the highest power, as annoying as that was. But that didn’t mean they backed down from glaring at Gabriel, fury and disdain radiating off them in waves. The tension in the room made Crowley’s skin crawl. He shifted uncomfortably in his chair, glancing from Gabriel to Beelzebub and back, until his gaze finally met Aziraphale’s.

Aziraphale sat quietly beside Gabriel, nervously wringing his hands in front of his belly and looking downright miserable. Since both their bosses were still too busy glowering at each other, Crowley screwed up his face and rolled his eyes at him.

Aziraphale’s lips twitched as he tried to suppress a laugh. His eyes gleamed in a way that made Crowley’s heart skip a beat, but as soon as Aziraphale turned his attention back to the conversation the last bit of his smile was gone.

“Umm,” Aziraphale started hesitantly, wincing as both Gabriel and Beelzebub suddenly fixed their gaze on him. “We could ask the client for an extension of the deadline. I’m sure they will be understanding. They did apologize for making last minute requests after all.”

Gabriel’s face grew stern as he now glared at Aziraphale instead of Beelzebub, and Crowley quickly jumped into the discussion before he could open his mouth and all the despicable things that must be running through his head could tumble out.

“We could, ah, maybe reuse some code from the project last month,” he started, shooting a nervous glance at Beelzebub. “Shouldn’t be too complicated to adapt, yeah? Could be done in two weeks. Three, maybe.”

For a moment Crowley thought Beelzebub might rip his head off for accommodating Gabriel, who was most definitely the enemy in their opinion, along with all the others working in client relations. But then their face relaxed just the tiniest bit.

“Fine,” they hissed. “If you get us that extension.”

Gabriel didn’t look too happy, but then he nodded. “Fine. Aziraphale will take care of it.”

Beelzebub rushed out of the room as soon as they were done. Crowley hoped to get a minute with Aziraphale, but Gabriel barked at him to follow when he turned to leave, and all Crowley got was the apologetic look Aziraphale threw over his shoulder right before they vanished around the corner. Crowley let out a long sigh, picked up his pen and notebook and trotted back down to his office.

The engineering department was in the basement, a bit too dark even for Crowley’s sensitive eyes. It always felt a bit too damp, a bit too cold to be comfortable. Crowley passed the posters on the walls, both the ominous “don’t lick the walls” posters he was used to and the newer, slightly unsettling “wash your hands” ones, until he reached his office and slumped back into his chair. The hand hygiene posters with their red, bold letters had been up for a week now, ever since the whole virus situation was getting a bit more serious. It made Crowley nervous, although London seemed to be safe so far. He knew that he should probably check the news more often than he actually did, but he also didn’t feel like he had any mental energy to deal with that sort of the thing at the moment. Meetings with Beelzebub and Gabriel always left him drained.

But no matter how bad a meeting had been, there was always one single person in this blasted company who could make him feel better. It was just what he needed right now.

Crowley fished his phone out of his pockets and opened his contacts. Right at the top was the person he was looking for: Angel. A nickname he had proposed one evening after too much wine had made him bold for once. It still made Crowley’s stomach flutter every time he read it. And beside of that, it served its purpose: no one would know that Crowley was consorting with the enemy, if anyone in the office would ever catch a glimpse of his screen.

Crowley sent a text: ‘How about Vietnamese for lunch? My treat.’

The answer came just a minute later, but Crowley still jumped in his chair, his heart skipping a beat in anticipation.

‘Our usual place?’ Aziraphale wrote.

 ‘Sure. Wherever you want, angel.’

 ‘Temptation accomplished.’

Crowley, who usually tried very hard to keep his reputation as a sleek bastard among his colleagues, couldn’t help but smile.

~~~

The prospect of seeing Aziraphale was way too distracting for Crowley to get any real work done for the rest of the morning. It had been a while since they’d met properly. It had only been polite nods in the corridors or annoying small talk in the elevator in the last few days, apart from the blasted meeting with their insufferable supervisors. Usually they met once a week for lunch, but both of them had been busy recently, and Crowley rarely had time for more than a sandwich scarfed down in the break room.

Crowley let out a sigh of relief when it was finally lunchtime and hurried to grab his jacket to get out of the building. Their usual place was a tiny restaurant a few streets over, so hidden between the large chain restaurants that they didn’t have to worry about running into their bosses or colleagues in there. Crowley had passed it two times a day for months on his way to work, but he had never even noticed it until Aziraphale had suggested it as their secret lunch spot, gushing over the delectable pho.

Aziraphale was already there when he entered, occupying a small table in one corner that shielded them from the view of the few other patrons. He was focused on the menu, reading glasses perched on his nose, but immediately looked up as Crowley approached. His lips curled into a smile so bright that it made Crowley’s head swim. Looking at Aziraphale’s smile was like staring into the sun, sometimes, filling him with such a warmth that Crowley feared he would burn one day.

“There you are, my dear,” Aziraphale said. “I was afraid Beelzebub would have pulled you into yet another meeting.”

Crowley snorted, sprawling into the chair opposite from Aziraphale and blushing faintly as his eyes seemed to follow every movement of Crowley’s too long limbs. “No, thankfully not. I think they had enough after that spat with Gabriel to deal with any more idiots today, including me.”

“You’re hardly an idiot,” Aziraphale tutted.

Crowley let out a sigh, letting his head loll back. “I must be, working in that hellhole,” he muttered.

From behind the menu, Aziraphale gave him another disapproving look. “Now you’re just being dramatic.”

“I’m dramatic?! When it’s Gabriel and Beelzebub who have declared themselves mortal enemies, even though they work for the same bloody company?”

“Well…” Aziraphale tilted his head, considering.

“Really, angel, how could I not be dramatic in response to that? This whole thing is ridiculous. We’re hiding that we’re going for lunch together, for Heaven’s sake!”

“You do have a point, my dear, but-”

“It’s not even against the company policies!” Crowley continued, too agitated to stop himself. “I mean, we’re friends, it’s not that we’re da-” Crowley managed to snap his mouth shut before any more words could tumble out.

Dating, that’s what he’d been about to say, but he couldn’t bring these words over his lips. It was a train of thought Crowley very much did not want to follow, because it only ended in the conclusion that he definitely did want to date Aziraphale. Wanted to hold his hand and wrap his arms around his middle and maybe kiss his pretty pink lips-

Aziraphale cleared his throat, pulling Crowley out of his thoughts before he could get to even more dangerous territories. A faint blush coloured Aziraphale’s cheeks. “Well,” he started, his voice a little wobbly. “I agree that it can be… inconvenient. But it’s probably better this way, for now. Can you imagine Gabriel’s mocking if he ever finds out?”

It stung a little, Aziraphale’s words. That meeting him was inconvenient. That being with Crowley was actually something worth mocking, and that Aziraphale cared enough about the wanker’s opinion to hide it. The hurt must have shown on his face, despite the glasses still obscuring his eyes, because Aziraphale’s face fell. He reached for Crowley’s hand on the table, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“I didn’t mean it like that. And every bit of inconvenience is more than worth it, my dear, if I get to spend time with you,” Aziraphale reassured him with a such a soft smile that it made Crowley’s eyes sting.

“Thanks,” Crowley managed to croak out, distracted by the gentle brush of Aziraphale’s thumb on the back of his hand. They had never touched before, not properly, intentionally like this. Aziraphale’s skin was warm and soft against his own. The caress sent a shiver down his spine, right to his toes, and Crowley let out a shuddering breath. Christ, if he was already this affected by such a small touch, what a wreck must he be when Aziraphale got his hands on him properly?

Crowley shook his head, banishing the thought before it could get him into any more trouble. Suddenly too shaken to bear the gentle touch any longer, he snatched his hand away and grabbed the menu so quickly he nearly knocked over his glass of water.

“D’you already know what you want to eat?” he started babbling, eyes wandering over the menu without taking in any of the information. “The dumplings were good last time, yeah?”

He felt Aziraphale’s piercing gaze on him, and for a second Crowley thought he wouldn’t get away with the sudden change of topic. But then Aziraphale pulled his hand back, leaned back in his chair and interlaced his fingers on top of his belly.

“I was thinking more of the cao lau this time,” he hummed.

Crowley let out a breath. “Sounds good,” he croaked.

The conversation flowed easily, as it always did with Aziraphale, once they’d ordered their lunch and steered away from any dangerous topics. Crowley relaxed as the meal went on, his nerves soothed by Aziraphale’s quick wit and humour, all the things that had drawn him to the other man ever since they’d gotten to know each other properly. It had taken just another argument between Gabriel and Beelzebub for that, a petty fight that forced them both to work late one evening, scrambling to overhaul a project just days before the deadline. They had quickly realized that they got things done quicker if they worked together, and also discovered that they genuinely liked each other’s company.

Ever since there had been hushed conversations, secret lunches, and occasionally, when Crowley was very, very lucky, a few drinks after a long day at work in Aziraphale’s cosy living room, where Crowley would lounge on the couch and Aziraphale would sit in the armchair, both of them surrounded by too many books to count.

Crowley didn’t even remember when exactly he’d fallen in love with Aziraphale. Maybe he had been right from the beginning, and every word, every look from Aziraphale over the past few months had just pushed him one step closer to damnation. It didn’t help that sometimes, Aziraphale would look at him just so, or say things that would make hope bloom in Crowley’s chest, both sweet and suffocating.

“We could, ah… maybe go for dinner on Friday after work? How do you feel about sushi?” Aziraphale said at the end of their meal, just when he was about to leave - a few minutes before Crowley, of course, because surely Hell would freeze over if they walked into work together for once. “It’s going to be a busy week, and I suppose we could both use a little treat by then?”

Crowley stared at him for a long moment before his useless brain finally comprehended Aziraphale’s words. His stomach swooped, because while they were used to going for lunch during their breaks, dinner was new and brought so many new possibilities that it made Crowley’s head swim. “Sure. Sounds good, angel,” he finally managed to get out, and Aziraphale beamed at him like Crowley had hung the stars.

“Wonderful,” Aziraphale cood, patting Crowley’s hand one more time before he got up. “I’ll look forward to seeing you, my dear.”

~~~

As it turned out, they did not see each other on Friday. Crowley had finally managed to read the news that afternoon, scrolling through the headlines with growing anxiety, but he was an optimist at the core and still didn’t expect the turn of events crashing down on him in the following week. London wasn’t as safe as he thought, and neither was the rest of the world. On Wednesday, all restaurants closed for the foreseeable future, including Aziraphale’s favourite sushi bar. On Thursday, chaos and panic broke loose as a co-worker from another floor that Crowley barely knew tested positive and half the workforce was put into quarantine. On Friday, instead of meeting up with Aziraphale after work, Crowley was officially and indefinitely banished to working from home. He spent the day in his uncomfortable designer chair in his too dark living room, staring at the wall as he tried to wrap his head around the situation and wondered what he had done to deserve things going so very wrong just another time.

[pnwswiftie]

I felt owned by an employer once. He was sexist and baited me into working for him only to turn the tables and gaslight me. And to be honest I’ve never pin pointed the feeling that has sat in my gut about him until recently; until watching my idol go through the same thing on a large scale in front of the world, until what has happened, what has been happening to Taylor Swift in her industry.

Mine was a veterinary surgeon whom I worked with in the past. I left the veterinary field and started a new career. The Vet (we will call him) moved away and when he came back he contacted me with a new idea to start his own practice.

He painted me a beautiful picture of what this clinic would be like. He said he couldn’t do it without me and promised me the world. I still remember the phone call where he said the words- “you will be my practice manager, my right hand, you could run the show and have a handsome career, I’ll make sure you are set for life, you will have an opportunity to buy into the company as well, to profit share.

He offered to pay me whatever my current job paid me. I didn’t jump at saying yes. I worked so hard to be where I was and this was a big risk. My now husband was hesitant and didn’t trust him 🚩 but supportive of whatever I chose (love him). Well, im the only one of me so a month later I took the jump and put in my notice. I trusted him.

I was hired on with one other person. A male, roughly my same age, overall a nice dude. We will call him Sam. I was in charge of all operations of the front desk and all aspects of the business side of things. I started every excel sheet for income tracking, taxes, inventory. I created every document, I created the scheduling program, I set up every vendor accounts. I scanned every piece of paper that came into the clinic doors, I set up our benefits. I answered phones I handled every single client. I visited clinics and preached to people our vision, so they would refer to us (we were a referral based clinic) on my days off. I did it ALL. I also scrubbed into surgery with the Vet and Sam, as there were only 3 of us running the entire show. If the phone rang, I would answer on a headset under my face mask and handle a client or clinic call right there, scrubbed in. I didn’t mind, I felt proud to show off my multitasking skills. He would give a little wink and a joke and the validation felt nice, like I earned his approval 🚩 when I did something above and beyond.

About a year went by and I was rolling in hard earned money, that’s for sure. I was working 7 am to 10 pm some days so I always had overtime. Sam was responsible for 1 thing- patient care, and I was responsible for LITERALLY everything else you could possibly think of. 🚩Needless to say I was getting worked to the BONE 🚩 . I was cool with it tho, this is what I signed up for right? We were growing and successful and getting BUSY!

One day I accidentally found out the pay gap 🚩between myself and Sam. I had been completely naive to the fact that we were not equals, nor was I getting paid “management” but that he made SUBSTANTIALLY more than me. I gave it some energy for a couple days and vented to my husband, then I let it go. Sam was nice, it’s not his fault. 🚩Maybe he’s just worth more than I am to the company, I told myself. 🚩Maybe he has a past history I didn’t know about that made him more valuable. It definitely should have been my red flag 🚩

My relationship with the Vet was kind of like a daughter and father but 🚩 only on his terms. Fun and playful and lots of “your our boss lady!”. It would also take very odd turns, 🚩 having to do small tasks outside my morals. In the office he would call me “the office manager, the boss, it’s all up to you, hospital administrator!” yet on the phone would call me 🚩 “the front desk person” 🚩“my receptionist” to other veterinarians. It bothered me, a lot, but I pushed it away. 🚩Who am I to be that nit picky over a title? 🚩He probably didn’t mean it or misspoke, I thought.

The tricky part is that I only have little under the radar examples of his abuse. 🚩 The ones you can’t QUITE put your finger on, that you can’t QUITE justify quitting on the spot but make you feel 🚩 worthless. They continued every day. He was incredibly sweet and funny, and then 🚩condescending and cruel. It was a roller coaster to try to please him constantly. It wore on me. I came to work and to deal with it I would make lists on scratch paper. Lists of why I was starting to hate my job. Lists that I would read in the car and cry. If I wasn’t cheerful he’d come in with 🚩“PMSING TODAY?” .... I’d laugh n bite my tongue. 🚩 That’s just being friendly playful right, he knows me well enough to say that to me, we’re like family, right? But every day I felt awful. And I needed my job now, more than ever. 🚩 He knew I needed this job, too. We had just put an offer on a house and surprise! we’re now expecting a baby.

Being pregnant changed things. I couldn’t assist in surgery and xrays like I used to. 🚩He would scoff when I would have to leave for prenatal appointments. 🚩 He would be caring and kind one minute, giving me hand me down baby clothes and gifts, and then cold and dry the next. 🚩Sam could and often would sleep in and no call/no show. He would roll in at noon and jump into surgery, acting like nothing happened, they’d joke together about women in front of me and being hung over. I was 5 min late once because of a traffic jam and had to have a “sit down meeting” about attendance. 🚩 I felt so ASHAMED and EMBARRASSED. 🚩 I had never once, NOT EVER, had work problems, attendance problems, behavioral problems, in my entire history of working. This job was my LIFE. 🚩 Was something seriously wrong with me???

The last straw came when I was 6 months pregnant. He claimed that everyone was having a private “check in meeting”. He told me at mine that 🚩him and Sam talked 🚩 and agreed that I’m not the happy bubbly girl I used to be. I sat with him in the shade of a big oak tree in the grass that has since fallen in a wind storm (ironically. He said I would be getting a $1 raise and that he wanted me to take on MORE responsibility since I could no longer assist in surgery and listed basically anything he could possibly think of to tack on to my job to make up for that $1. 🚩 all I could think was... how???? I was already drowning. I finally got courage this time and said NO. My lip quivered and tears ran down my face with 🚩 stress. I brought up valid arguments but looking back I wish my voice wasnt so timid. Or that I had the courage to call out just one, ONE instance of his inappropriate behavior. But lastly, 🚩 I asked why is my title “FRONT DESK PERSON” when Sam is now “Lead Surgery Operations Director (Who Does No Wrong)??

His response sticks with me to this day. It was painful and degrading and I will never forget it. After working my ass off and building this place from the bottom, the long nights and everything I gave them... I also will never forget his 🚩 smirk . “Well you see, giving you a title like that would be like rewarding a BAD DOG with a BONE” 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

🚩I was devastated. 🚩And confused. 🚩I’m a BAD DOG???

I stuck it out for the remainder of my pregnancy, working the 12 hour days up until I went into labor at work. I trained a new girl on every process, excel spread, schedule I had developed and created. I put on a fake smile and wrote my scratch lists and re-read my lists on the way home and cried. I couldn’t just quit. I couldn’t let my family down.

We had our baby and stared at his tiny toes and fingers and cried every single day that I may have to go back to my hell job. I interviewed for different clinics while on leave. I was desperate. The vet was on a sweet streak- 🚩 sending us gifts, having his wife cook us meals and checking in on us all the time. He frequently asked what date I was coming back. He informed me that when I came back I would need to take the later shift and give the new girl my current shift. 🚩She needed it, he said. He said we could discuss the title of “lead receptionist” now and could 🚩 continue to work towards my goal of hospital manager. 🚩 I accepted but I felt sick. 🚩 I felt like I had to go back to work for someone who I couldn’t trust. I felt like he owned me in the worst possible way. (At one time he even tried to tell me I had half of the PTO that I actually had saved up for maternity leave, another 🚩🚩🚩 but I saved my paystubs as PROOF)

Today I work for the clinic that we shared the building with. When they heard I left they immediately offered me a position. The Vet left to purchase his own facility. He acted shocked and surprised and in disbelief that I wasn’t returning. At first it was tough, not gonna lie. We literally ate noodles for a year because I went down to part time. But the bravest thing I ever did was RUN ♥️ I now LOVE my job and they treat their employees wonderfully and equally and have real life morals.

I actually didn’t intend for this to be a novel LOL but even if not a single soul reads this, it’s therapeutic for me to actually get my thoughts down after almost 6 years now. My advice is to ALWAYS trust your gut. TRUST THE 🚩 RED 🚩 FLAGS. Don’t let anyone make you question your character. Never EVER ACCEPT being controlled and manipulated against your morals. Choose the future over time spent in the past (thanks T @taylorswift) and work somewhere that respects you. That pays you FAIRLY. Don’t be afraid to TELL your story too because this has to STOP (I’ve almost deleted this whole thing 13x) If it happened to me I can’t imagine how many other women it happens to. Anyway if you read this then holy shit here’s a hug and CHIN UP YOU ARE WORTHY, YOU ARE NOT A BAD DOG. ♥️

[that-never-happened]

Stand By Me

Ok here we go, never done this before so....

The first time they danced was in a grimy bar.  She had smiled when the opening notes of Stand By Me played and Chris just wanted to see it again, so he asked her if she wanted to dance. She laughed and agreed so they swayed to the original version giggling a little the entire time.  He learned her name and what made her smile that night.

The second time they danced was in a movie theater, it was before the previews and oddly enough Stand By Me started playing through the speakers with the lyrics on the screen.  She drew in a sharp breath and jokingly told Chris that if he loved her he would dance with her.  He looked at her for a long moment and smiled as he stood offering her his hand.  With tears in her eyes she took it and as they swayed her voice broke just a little as she told him that she loved him too. He learned her heart and her body that night.

The third time they danced was a terrible day at work.  Her boss had been snide with her about the placement of paperclips on the reports and clients had been condescending all day. When he appeared in front of her desk she looked a little irritated that he was early.  She told Chris that she couldn’t leave early, so he asked if she could take a short break.  She sighed and agreed, taking his hand as he led her to the small break area outside.  She looked at him a little confused, wondering what he was doing but he just smiled and took his phone out to hit a couple of buttons.  As Chris put it back into his front shirt pocket she heard the first haunting strains of a song playing.  When she finally recognized the song she smiled and let him take her hand to dance, suddenly the day didn’t seem so bleak anymore. Once again they swayed to the music this time to a female voice singing.  He maintained eye contact and started singing the words to her softly. As the music played he pulled her closer and she felt him fumble with her left hand on his shoulder and slip something on her ring finger.  When she looked down and saw the engagement ring it became clear what he was asking. When she smiled and gently kissed him, Chris had his answer.  That night Chris learned what a lifetime with her could feel like.

This is my first ever anything written for anything.  The original version of Stand By Me is by Ben E. King and the proposal version is the Florence + The Machine

for @lancetuckersmustache  @the-ss-horniest-book-club

[yaachtynoboat711]

Fonder Ch. 4

A/N: Aight so boom: I hope y’all are enjoying this series so far. It’s definitely pushing me out of my fluffy comfort zone. Thanks to everyone who I’ve annoyed had be my third pair of eyes and offered suggestions for these chapters. I appreciate y’all big time. Also, I apologize for the two-week gap between the chapters. I just started school after a semester break, so I’m trying to get adjusted and find my rhythm. Thanks in advance for being patient!

Word Count: ~2.9K (a hair lengthy)

Warning(s): Angst, slow burn, plot progression

Thursday, October 23, 2014, 2:19 p.m., Elements Natural Hair Boutique, Los Angeles

Since she was finally finished with the nearly four month long legal project, Yaa now had a little over a week left in sunny California to do whatever she wanted. Tonight was her self-appointed reward for knocking the project out of the park and earning more clients. The Los Angeles chapter of the Black Yale Alumni Association was hosting their annual fundraising gala. All the BYAA chapters hosted their events the same weekend, the Connecticut event being the flagship event. Around this time last year, Yaa was preparing her ensemble for the Black Ball, totally oblivious to the fact that she would meet her soulmate at the Ball. What a difference a year makes.

“So, who are you taking as your plus one tonight?”, her loctician Nadia inquired as she intricately palm-rolled Yaa’s copper hued locs.

“Matt.”, Yaa announced giving a smirk as she kept reading the latest issue of Essence Magazine. Nadia’s eyebrows went up as she smirked.

“Damn hussy. Speaking of exes, how’s it going with you and Island Boy?”

“Things are getting...better.”

Since her breakdown, Khalida had seen a therapist. Her therapist recommended that for her sake,it’d be best to talk to Winston and try to establish a sturdy friendship. They planned to meet the afternoon after the Yale gala.

“Word? I’m happy for you, sis. Even more, you deserve someone in your life. Shit, you got the personality, smarts, and the looks to have niggas running over each other to get to you.”

Yaa spent the time under the dryer to think about what her loctician said. Her deep thoughts were interrupted with an incoming FaceTime call from Matt.

“Hey, lil ugly.”, Matt playfully chided.

“Well, if it isn’t the NECKS big thing in football. What’s good?”, Yaa snapped back. Matt’s jaw dropped when he finally processed her insult.

“Damn, fuck you, Khay. Anyways, I called to see where we would get ready at? My house or yours?” She almost didn’t hear the last question because she was snickering so.

“Well, according to the GPS, it’s in Calabasas, so I’ll be coming to you. My makeup cases are in the car now and I’m picking my dress up on the way.”

Matt shook his head, “Say less, ma. You getting those serpents tamed for the gala, I see.” He thought that the funniest thing in the world. Before he could say anything else, she hung up. I ain’t got time for his no-neck having ass.

5:00 p.m., Calabasas, California, Matt’s House

Yaa was welcomed into Matt’s spacious mansion with the sounds of hip-hop bouncing off the walls and an excited Matt embracing her.

“You look like you getting ready to fight somebody.”, Matt commented as he took the garment bag from his ex-girlfriend’s arms. She wore her smaller black bonnet, along with a Tuskegee shirt, black yoga capris, and Birkenstock’s.

“And you look like you can’t change a goddamn pillowcase. I keep telling you to leave well enough alone, Griffith.”, she replied as she gave him the “Who gon check me, boo?” look. He shook his head as he led her upstairs to his bathroom.

——

The lion-like revving of Matt’s Karma Revero engine could be heard all along the winding Calabasas back road he decided to take to the gala. He effortlessly finessed the bends and sharp turns of the road in an effort to impress Yaa. He’d had the car for not even a month and was already showing off. He occasionally glanced at the meal that sat in his passenger seat.

“I think I already told you, but you lookin’ hella delicious, ma.”, Matt complimented.

“Why, thank you, Matthew. I try to be as fresh as you.”, she humbly replied.

He took her hand into his and smiled before kissing it. “What’s that perfume you got on? It’s intoxicating.”

“Your cologne.”, she stated bluntly. The two looked at each other and laughed obnoxiously.

“You never cease to amaze me after all these years, Khay. I’m gonna miss you when you leave.”

“Nigga, I ain’t dying. Ima be around when and if I can. R E L A X.”

8:49 p.m., Calabasas Country Club

If you didn’t know that this was an alumni fundraising gala, most would assume that it was an actual Hollywood event. The sound of camera shutters, camera people shouting at those melanated beings gracing the carpet, and the numerous interviews being conducted at the end of the carpet set the vibe of the night. Once again: Black Excellence.

Matt parked his car in front of the country club, he tossed the keys to the valet before reaching for his velvet maroon blazer. Before the valet driver could get in, he stopped him. “Hold on, boss. I got precious cargo in the passenger seat.” He ran over to Yaa’s side where he slowly opened her door. She offered her hand and he helped her out of the car, gathering her train with his other hand.

The BLUE carpet went up the moment Matt Griffith and his date walked onto the carpet. He held Yaa close to him by her waist as they went down the carpet once more as a duo.  She followed suit by tickled his side, causing him to laugh.

“You gon stop, ma’am.”, he warned as she joined in his laughter.

————

Winston was wary of bringing Michelle to the gala. Not because she wasn’t Black, but he was nervous Yaa would show up looking like God’s divine example of perfection. For the small amount of time Winston and Michelle dated, he never divulged the details of his previous relationship with her. For one, it still hurt to talk about the biggest mistake he’d ever made; and two, he feared Michelle would get extremely jealous. Truthfully, Winston hoped Yaa would be there; he wanted to talk and possibly get closure.

“Winston, is Lupita coming?”, Michelle asked shaking Winston out of his thoughts.

“Uhhh...last I checked, she should be here now.”, he replied.

“Is your mysterious ex coming?”

He throat tightened and palms began to sweat. “I doubt it; she’s in D.C. by now. Why?”

“I mean, from the little you’ve told me about her,  she’s a Yale grad and a traveler. Speaking of, why don’t you talk about her?”, she folded her arms in anticipation of the answer.

He probably wasn’t in reality, but he felt like he was sweating bullets. “It’s just that...the relationship could’ve ended on better terms.”, he sighed, “I just need closure, is all. I’ve been spending this time processing everything. I think I’m good now.” He was lying like all hell.

Winston felt a presence in the room. He and Michelle migrated around the venue talking and socializing with the other Black Yale grads. While in a conversation with one of his classmates and Lupita, he heard a laugh. Not just any laugh; the only vibrant, contagious social laugh he could recognize from miles away. Once again, it was her. He resisted the urge to look for her.  

Noticing her friend’s sudden switch in energy, Lupita turned around to see a foxy Yaa dazzling for all to see. She excused herself from the conversation and walked over to Yaa. She tapped her shoulder.

“Heyyyyy, Khalida!”, Lupita greeted with a grin and open arms.

“Well, hello there, Ms. Academy Award Winner! I’m surprised you’re not like polishing your Oscars or filming.”, Yaa joked as she returned the hug. “You look phenomenal, Peet!”, she twirled Lupita around to get a better look of her blue ensemble.

“Not as phenomenal as you! Wow, you know how to slay anything and I’m here for it!”

Matt cleared his throat. “You need a cough drop?”, Yaa asked in a sarcastic tone. He gave her a look.

“I’m sorry. I forgot he was here. Lupita, this is my ex, Matt Griffith, NFL star. Matt, this is the most beautiful woman in existence and Academy Award-winning actress, Lupita Nyong’o.”

After their exchange of pleasantries, Lupita took Yaa to the side to inform her that Winston was also in attendance...with Michelle. As much as it hurt to hear those words come from Lupita’s mouth, Yaa sucked it up and the two returned to Matt.

“We’re going on a field trip, Matt. Come along.” Lupita commanded. Matt agreed and followed his date with her train.

Winston wasn’t paying attention; he was walking around talking with Michelle. He accidentally bumped into Lupita.

“Peet, I’m so sorry. I was talking to Michelle and wasn’t paying attention to...wh-where I...was...going.”, his thoughts and heart rate began to speed up as he looked at the sight in front of him: his ex-girlfriend.

“Hey, Khalida.”, Winston said calmly.  

“Hey, you.”, she basically whispered in a sultry tone.

“You look...sublime.”

“Oh? Interesting word choice, Mr. Duke.” She raised her eyebrow and gave a faint grin. Poor Winston was intoxicated with Khalida’s presence once more—a drug that he could never get out of his system even if his life depended on it. His eyes were fixed on her, breath staggering.

Yaa’s dress was everything: it was a black, long-sleeved, sequined, floor-length curve-hugging gown with a dramatic “v” neck that accentuated her well-endowed chest. A haute Morticia Addams. Nadia styled her locs into a mid bun with a pinned bang.  

Michelle looked on as they conversed. It clicked—Khalida was the one that still had his heart. She wasn’t stupid; she could sense he was holding out in their relationship in more ways than one. Michelle cleared her throat loudly to break up the two former lovers’ sappy reunion.

“Winston, aren’t you going to introduce me to your...friend? ”, Michelle said with a slightly condescending tone, looking Yaa up and down with disgust. Yaa returned a rather unbothered stare to Michelle.

“Oh...of course, Winston began clearing his throat, “Yaa, this is my girlfriend, Michelle Lee, freelance journalist. Michelle, this...this is my...ex...girlfriend, Dr. Khalida Abdullah, Attorney at Law.”, he fought a smile.

Michelle grimaced. “Oh, a lawyer, you say? What kind of lawyer? Whose firm do you work for?”, she interrogated.

“I’m a civil rights attorney and I have my own firm with my partner and best friend from Yale Law.”

“Your own law firm? You look a little too young to own anything. How old are you?”

“Grown.”

“Did you even hear the quest—“

“— Loud and clear. I said I’m grown.” Yaa maintained her calm, yet petty demeanor throughout the unnecessary exchange. All the while, Matt and Lupita exchanged glances and silent snickers. Yaa was going to hold her own without hesitation. The Louisiana Reaper v. the bell pepper. “Winston, may I speak with you in private please?”

Winston looked to an upset Michelle that just waved her hand for him to go on. “After you, Dr. Abdullah.”,he calmly suggested as he motioned her to go in front of him.

Winston made sure to hold Yaa’s train. Winston became entranced as he watched his ex’s Spanx-less bottom switch from left to right. He felt a sweat come over him. Baby girl still had him sprung. They finally walked out to the balcony. The nighttime October breeze hit Yaa’s bare skin, sending goosebumps throughout her body. The bass still bumped even outside the country club. Even with the low lighting on the balcony, Yaa’s dress still sparkled in the moonlit sky. The two stood across from each other. A lot was on their minds and rightfully so. Four months had gone by without any sense of closure. The lack of closure was pacified with many questions, hypotheses, what-if situations, and many, many tearful nights on both ends.

“So uhh—“, the former lovers said in unison. They chuckled.

“You go first.”

“No, you!”

“No...you.”

“Dammit, Winston, somebody going first.”, Yaa said crossing her arms. “I just wanted to say that one, I miss you. Two, I’m happy for you finding Michelle. Lastly, LEMME FOUND OUT YOU OUTCHEA ACTIN YA ASS OFF ON PERSON OF INTEREST, MINI!”, Yaa hyped. She playfully punched his shoulder. There was a visible shift in her body language. She re-adjusted her posture and looked down at her dress. When she looked back up at Winston, he saw a rather stoic expression come across her face. “No, but...I wanted to just speak with you in private and I’m sure you’ve wanted the same. I miss you, Chris.”

Before he spoke, Winston offered his jacket to Yaa, an offer she accepted.

“I miss you more, Yaa.”, Winston replied quickly.

“The four months that we’ve had apart have had me thinking...a lot...a little too much. While the circumstances of our break-up hurt me more than anything, I don’t harbor any ill-will or harsh feelings towards you. I still care for and love you deeply.”

The admission gave Winston a temporary sense of relief. After four long months apart from the love of his life, it was definitely a relief to know that she didn’t want to push him over the balcony ledge. However, that feeling of relief was quickly replaced by the familiar void feeling in his heart—a void left by Yaa. He missed her more she would ever comprehend. He even missed her sarcasm and readings. By this time, he stood in front of her studying her stoic facial expression.

“I still love and care for you, too, Khalida.”, Winston replied.

“Which brings me to my next point”, she began. Winston’s brows furrowed in confusion, “This time apart has also given me the opportunity to contemplate our relationship from this point forward. My therapist...recommended that I reach out to you to establish something we never had—an actual friendship.”, Yaa explained. There was a steady pause and sharp exhale before the word “friendship” left her lips. It hurt her to see Winston with Michelle and even more to not be with him.

Winston blankly stared at Yaa. He saw, heard, and comprehended every word coming out of her Ruby Woo painted lips, but everything wasn’t registering.

“Friends?”

“That’s what I said. I believe we can work as friends and support each other despite our ending. You and Michelle seem like you all are getting into a rhythm and I don’t want to be your hindrance in your loving her.”

“Ok. Yeah...friendship? No problem.”, he noted dryly.

“Winston?”

“Yes?”

“Is that what you truly want? Because I don’t want to let our connection die.”

Winston shifted his weight and sighed before laughing. “Doesn’t want our connection to die...got it. Of course, we can work on a friendship.”, he remarked in a condescending tone. He was repeating that made him lose Yaa the first time. Yaa finally picked up the hints of sarcasm.

“Winston, I don’t know why you’re being condescending and cold towards me, but you need to stop. I just came to talk and try to amends with you and salvage what little we have left between us.” Yaa felt herself getting emotional and angry simultaneously.

Winston began pacing. “Oh, now you want to talk to me when it seemed easy to give me...give us up?!”

Yaa’s eyebrows flew up and her jaw dropped. Her heartbeat began increasing and her petite frame began to tremble—she was beginning to see red. Her mouth opened to snap, but it quickly closed to save his ego and feelings. “I don’t want us to end on this note...again.”, she mumbled.

“I don’t know what you from me, Yaa. This isn’t exactly easy so stop making it look like that.”

Yaa thought long and hard on her next statement. Being a known wordsmith, she had to craft what she was going to say to make sure it would stick with Winston. That and her anger was on 100, so one wrong move and she’d snap. She finally began to speak barely above a whisper but not quite at normal speaking level.

“What I wanted from you was to make sure the plane wasn’t still malfunctioned. But...I see that it’s temporarily disabled. Whenever you get your head and your ego out of your ass, we can talk. The number won’t change. Good night, Mr. Duke.”

She briskly walked back inside of the country club, fighting tears and the urge to break down once more. She wasn’t going to force a grown ass man to do right; Khadijah and Carrie taught her better than that. Once again, his mouth and his ego ran Yaa off. Fuck, whatever happened to doing better and winning her back? The second walk-out hurt more than the first. This time, he was actually angry with himself. Out of nowhere, his fist made contact with the concrete wall. He roared out in pain as his knuckles bled. Not only was his hand in pain in excruciating pain, but so was his heart. Both injuries could’ve been prevented had he just shut up. The tears burned and clouded his eyes as he cried hysterically.

Yaa returned to find Lupita and Matt deep in conversation, Michelle was sitting down at one of the lounge tables. Right away, Matt noticed his date’s rather bubbly and sweet spirit had been messed with.

“Khay, what’s wrong? Is everything alright?”, Matt placed his hand at the small of her back as he studied her visibly upset face. She was fighting back tears.

“Everything’s not ok. Let’s just go before I’ll need to dig Johnnie Cochran up from the dead.” Peet, I’ll text you whenever I can. Lunch is still on for tomorrow.”, she muttered in a monotonous tone.

Matt found himself running after his date as she angrily walked out of the venue. The plane was totaled.

Tag List:

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[ash818]

hi ash, how are you? Was wondering what Jon and Tish were up to these days?

It is not possible, as it turns out, to involve yourself with only one Queen.

They are all hopelessly tangled in each other’s lives, and to love one of them is to surrender to the rest, who will adopt your troubles as their troubles and your triumphs as their triumphs. Aunt Thea settles in next to you, swirling a glass of wine, and smiles as if she knows your secrets just before deftly teasing them out of you. Mrs. Queen tiptoes up to the edge of her children’s boundaries, but she can’t resist peeking over; mostly, she is too sincere to refuse. Abigail doesn’t even bother to tiptoe. Mr. Queen is the most hands-off, but even he quietly smooths over little difficulties behind your back. You don’t find out that he’s done it until months later, if ever.

So when Mrs. Queen was struggling to find an administrative assistant not long after my graduation, I suppose she found it perfectly natural to ask me.

“I can’t exactly post ‘occasional vigilantism’ as a requirement on LinkedIn,” she told me. “But the secret is safe with you, and you have the requisite skill set. I think you’d be perfect. Ideal. Sans pareil.” She tilted her head faintly. “Did I say that right?”

I tried to be gentle when I pointed out, “My boyfriend’s mother would be my boss.”

“Is that weird?” She wrinkled her nose. “I’m Jon’s boss, and it’s not weird. You know if you get tired of him, you still get to stay. I hope that’s not your concern. You can keep coming to family dinners and everything.”

That honestly had not occurred to me. “Wouldn’t the rest of the office consider it blatant nepotism?”

“With Jon, they got over it as soon as they realized he wasn’t useless. You’ll be fine too.” She leaned closer to me and said earnestly, “Look, I could really use the help.”

I knew as much; Jon had been complaining for months that she shouldn’t be going it alone anymore.

“I know you’re looking for something in your field, but it seems like that might take some time. This is only a first job to get you started and build a little work history, just until you find something better.”

As I said, Mrs. Queen is too sincere to refuse.

When I came into the office to formally accept her offer, she shook my hand across her desk and said, “Don’t breathe a word to Jon. I want to surprise him.”

My first morning at Panoptic, she called Jon into her office to meet her new admin, and she had a good giggle at the look on his face. But the shock wore off in about five minutes, and at the first opportunity, he tried to back me against a wall and put his hands up my shirt.

“This was nowhere in the job description,” I said, once I had worked up some self-control.

“Nope.” He bent down to kiss my neck. “This is just perks.”

It took me longer than it should have to push him backwards, but eventually I managed it. “Your mother did not hire me to make your life more fun.”

“Of course she didn’t. That would be messed up.” He sighed theatrically. “So no bending you over my desk.”

Heat washed through me, and I closed my eyes and let myself imagine it for just a moment. With an effort, I shook my head. “No inappropriate use of any desks.”

In my first week as Felicity Queen’s admin, I learned to navigate her unusual scheduling software, the source code of which she had modified heavily to suit her preferences. I learned to document meetings in her idiosyncratic system, to recognize her frantic hand signal for, “Tell them I’m busy,” and to brew coffee strong enough to wake the dead.

A few of the employees - mostly protectors who had guarded me in the past - welcomed me enthusiastically. The others reserved judgment, and I overheard at least one joke in the break room, speculating on what I had really been hired to do here, which cemented my resolve about desks and the uses thereof.

On my sixth day at Panoptic, I met Jeremy Price Longwood.

“I’m sorry, who?” Mr. Queen asked at dinner the previous night.

“Think Chris Hemsworth,” Mrs. Queen explained. “Or Pratt or Evans or Pine. Really, any of the Chrises.”

Mr. Queen blinked, just once, where a man less stoic might have grimaced in distaste. “Ah.”

“We’re guarding his face,” Jon said. “Specifically his face. It’s insured for half a million.”

“Much more than that, certainly,” I said.

He gave me a look.

The next morning, Mrs. Queen called together the team delegated to Mr. Longwood’s case. “He’s in Starling to shoot a Romeo and Juliet ‘reimagining,’ as if we needed another one of those. Ever since that werewolf movie, he’s been seeing an uptick in creepers. Nothing he hasn’t handled before, but we’re going to keep somebody nearby. We don’t want some poor deluded soul running on set and shoving a bundle of love letters down his shirt. It’s embarrassing, and he’s had enough of that this year.”

“Enough love letters down his shirt?” said Ms. Ramirez.

“Enough embarrassment.” Mrs. Queen gave a little shudder. “The werewolf thing. Poor guy.”

He had his shirt off for half the movie. Personally, I thought he had nothing at all to be embarrassed about.

“Sounds pretty standard,” Jon said, getting to his feet. “Who wants the first evening shift?”

Not half an hour later, the man himself came striding through the front doors with a small styrofoam cup in his hands, and he came straight to me at the front desk. “Hey, sorry I’m late,” he said. “Y’all know the numbers have rubbed off the elevator buttons?”

On film, he was lovely, but in person, he was devastating. It took me a moment to answer him. “I apologize for the confusion. Can I get you anything? Water or coffee?”

He raised the styrofoam cup. “Your neighbors one floor up - the divorce law firm? - they hooked me up.” He gave me a conspiratorial smile, and my heart skipped a beat. “No one tell my wife I walked in there.”

I would have loved to joke right back. All I managed was, “Of course not.” Hopefully my cheeks weren’t visibly pink. “I’ll show you to the conference room and lets Mrs. Queen know you’re here.”

“How did you find out about us?” was among Mrs. Queen’s standard battery of questions for new clients.

“A friend gave me your name,” said Mr. Longwood. “You came recommended by Bruce Wayne, so he figured you must be the real deal.”

Mrs. Queen looked unduly pleased by that, considering.

By the time he left an hour later, half the staff was as charmed as I was.

“Aw, he’s gonna be easy,” Darius said. “I can already tell. No clubbing, no foolishness, no babysitting his drunk ass. This dude lives in the gym and eats unsalted chicken breast.”

“Certainly looks that way,” Ms. Ramirez agreed. “Did you hear he called me ma’am? I love when these Southern boys do that. It means they’ll fucking listen.”

Once everyone else had cleared out, I turned to Mrs. Queen. “Didn’t Mr. Queen and Mr. Wayne have a bit of a falling out?”

“They did, but he never fell out with Panoptic. Bruce used to have Dig guarding him every time he was in Starling.”

“Was that, ah, strictly necessary?” I said delicately. “For Batman?”

“Of course not. Bruce just thought it was funny.”

Within a few days, Mr. Longwood left us all utterly disarmed.

Except for Jon. Very few people can disarm Jonathan Queen, and Jeremy Price Longwood is not among them. After a week of protective services and one more office meeting, Jon’s ultimate assessment was: “What a cheeseball.”

“I think he’s sincere,” I said.

“That’s because he’s a skillful cheeseball.”

“Ah, of course, he fooled the silly little girl,” I said, crossing my arms. “But you see right through him with an unbiased eye.”

“He makes you all fluttery. Admit it.”

“Darius and Ms. Ramirez also found him courteous and friendly, and you can’t accuse either of them of getting fluttery.”

“Jones likes anyone who pays for lunch, and Ramirez likes dumb golden retrievers who sit and stay on command.”

“You weren’t this mean about the oil exec making business trips to Angola - the one who almost definitely had a genuine personality disorder. But this one, you can’t stand.”

“This one expects me to like him. The BP guy had the decency not to give a damn.”

I sighed. “All right, Jonathan.”

It’s not difficult to understand, in the end. Jon is a good-looking man, if I do say so myself, and he is in fantastic shape. But he lives in a permanent state of three-day scruff, and he will always look more boyish than debonair. He is in the kind of shape optimized to slam into you like a hammer, not the kind engineered to look good on camera.

Perfectly gelled and professionally dressed Jeremy Price Longwood is standing right there, and of course Jon is supremely irritated by him. It’s like when I have to stand next to willowy Elaine Diggle, magnified severalfold.

“Tell me something,” I said, mostly as a distraction. “What was so funny about asking Mr. Diggle to guard people who didn’t exactly need guarding?”

“Oh, that.” Jon shook his head. “My dad spent years pretending to lose sparring matches to Dig, just to make sure everybody knew what a helpless marshmallow he was. Drove Dig up the wall.”

I never quite understood the dynamics of combat sports. “Why would he care, if it was all part of their cover?”

“You know when you get old enough to realize your dad is letting you win at Battleship or whatever?”

No, I couldn’t say I knew how that felt.

Jon cleared his throat. “It’s condescending as hell. Especially when he thinks it’s hilarious, and you can’t make him stop laughing, because if you try he’s just going to lay you out on the floor again.”

“He did this to you as well,” I surmised.

“He wears ties and reading glasses,” Jon said, rolling his eyes. “He’s just a boring middle-aged public servant, play-fighting to stay in shape. He doesn’t even know how to break someone’s neck. Honest.”

“You Queens are a strange tribe.”

Jon shrugged. “You joined. What does that make you?”

What, indeed?

That summer, I learned Panoptic inside out. I took notes on Mrs. Queen’s consultations with a businessman who traveled extensively in Mexico, with one of Laurel Lance’s attorneys recently assigned to an organized crime case, and with a woman who wore a cast on her left wrist and who had recently procured a restraining order against her husband.

Most of the people who came through our doors were terrified for one reason or another. Mrs. Queen coaxed information out of them with a practiced cheerfulness that should have felt inappropriate, but which they mostly found comforting. Jon did it much more bluntly, which occasionally rubbed people the wrong way, but more often inspired shockingly unreserved trust.

“That’s one of the upsides of a runaway mouth,” Mrs. Queen said ruefully. “People notice you’ve fumbled the reins, and they assume that’s the same thing as honesty.”

I shook my head. “I think it’s because they can tell he’s genuinely listening. Most people wait for their turn to talk.”

“You know,” Mrs. Queen tipped her head at me, “not one of his teachers, through twenty-ish years of school, ever singled out listening as one of his strengths.”

“Mr. Queen is the same way,” I pointed out. “He looks you right in the eyes, and you feel like you have his complete and undivided attention.”

She nodded thoughtfully. “Even when he’s actually thinking about the fastest way to get you out of his office.” She grinned, swiveling back to her computer. “Oliver worked hard at his politician face.”

By September, I knew more about my boyfriend’s mother than anyone reasonably should.

I knew that she could only stare at a screen for three hours before she got a headache. She took her disgusting coffee with a disgusting amount of artificial sweetener. She got anxious before Skype meetings with Dig and Lyla, because this was their baby she was raising. She wore a size six or eight, depending on the brand, and a nice man named Warren dyed her hair every seven weeks.

“I suspect Thursday nights are date nights,” I mused out loud to Jon one afternoon. “She rarely leaves after five, and she sometimes sends me to Martin’s Wine Cellar first.”

“That’s nice,” he said vaguely. “Thursdays are Bordeaux sex. Everybody loves Bordeaux sex.” A few moments later, he looked up from his glassbook to frown at me. “Do you think my family has boundary issues?”

I shrugged and went back to my backlog of emails.

Over the course of Romeo and Juliet’s shooting schedule, Panoptic intercepted a few cringeworthy letters to Mr. Longwood, and our protectors turned away the odd paparazzo or pushy fan, but altogether the job was as easy as Darius predicted.

“Longwood’s got a solid right straight too,” Darius said. “Apparently stage fighting isn’t complete bullshit.”

Mrs. Queen narrowed her eyes at him. “You’ve been beating up your principal?”

I glanced at Jon, who looked both annoyed and intrigued.

“He’s gone to work on some strike mitts with me, that’s all,” Darius said. “I told you, this dude lives at the gym.”

“Just don’t mess up his face,” Jon advised with mock seriousness. “Be very careful with the face.”

“You want to take a swing at him,” I said, as soon as Darius left the room. “Don’t pretend.”

His shrug was not denial.

“He’s an excellent client, and you may not hit him,” Mrs. Queen said. “No matter how annoyingly pretty he is.”

“That’s not the - “

“Yes, it is.” On her way out the door, she patted his cheek, and then she nodded meaningfully at me. “She thinks you’re adorable. Good enough, right?”

She winked at me, and then she headed for her office.

Jon rubbed the bridge of his nose and sighed heavily. “I think the boss just gave us permission to flirt at work. I don’t like it.”

I gave him a couple of consoling pats. “It’s just perks, darling.”

When Romeo and Juliet wrapped, there was no call for Mr. Longwood to return to our office, but he dropped by to say thank you and sign autographs. He had that kind of class. For Jon, he offered an especially strong handshake and his most sparkling Southern smile - “Thank you for all you do” - and Jon returned it warmly.

As soon as the door closed behind Longwood, Jon muttered, “Extremely punchable face, though.”

Mrs. Queen and I exchanged a smile, and we went back to work.

[savannacentralperk]

The Perks Chp 10 pt 1

“Just call him…”

A deep breath was taken as her phone was unlocked. Selecting her contacts, they were thumbed through until his name popped up. She hesitated a bit looking at the name. Butterflies formed in her stomach, making the cramps she was dealing with even worse.

“Hey, Dave! I’m so sorry I’ve been a jerk lately. I’m just going through some… stuff, and didn’t mean to take it out on you.”

Brook stared at his name.

Just call him, she thought. Just call him…

The home button was pressed, erasing his name from the screen.

“Later,” she said to herself. “I’ll call him later.” ……………

“The male sex organs are divided into three parts.”

Murmurs and giggles around the classroom became slightly more uncontrolled as the video switched to a display of canine genitalia. Its cartoonish design was more detailed than Nick felt it should be, displaying full frontal and from each side. The females of the class audibly speculated about the males surrounding them, a pair of them grinning coyly in his direction.

Nick groaned in embarrassment as he buried his muzzle in his paws as the narrator carried on.

“The bulbus glandus becomes locked inside the female during ejaculation. This helps insure pregnancy, as well as helps build the emotional bond between mates.”

Wheezing laughter came from the chubby coyote sitting next to him as the video went on about body changes and hygiene.

“I bet mine is bigger than the others here,” he whispered to the fox with a grin after he composed himself.

Rolling his eyes, Nick refused to look over at his desk mate, shaking his head at the crass comment. Unable to watch the video anymore, his gaze flicked around the darkened room. He saw most of the kits in class with him were foxes, with a few wolves and other canines thrown in.  

Soon the video ended and the instructor flipped the lights back on, a collective groan coming from light sensitive group. The she-wolf beamed around at the dazed youths, bouncing lightly on the balls of her feet.

“Any questions?” she asked cheerfully.

A few paws were lifted into the air, one young wolf being selected.

“Does knotting hurt?” she asked.

“Generally, it does the first time.” The females of the class winced. “But, as with sex itself, the discomfort and pain will fade the more you and your mate do it.”

Another female raised her paw, this one a vixen.

“Do you have to wait to get married before having sex?”

“That is something you and your parents should discuss, but I do encourage you to wait until marriage before you do. Yes, Mr. Wilde?”

“What about interspeices relationships? Would it be possible to mate with someone who isn’t a canine?” The giggles that followed the question caused the todd’s ears to flatten as he looked around uncertainly. Surprisingly, one young vixen was silent, her eyes moving back to the teacher in obvious curiosity.

“Mr. Wilde, the point of intercourse is reproduction,” the she-wolf explained, her condescending tone causing both him and the vixen to frown at her. “If you can’t reproduce with your partner, then there’s no point in mating with them.”

The vixen’s paw shot in the air, a scowl curling her muzzle. “My sister is unable to have kits. Should she and her husband not bother mating?”

Her voice was rude and aggressive, causing the wolf to falter a bit before straightening.

“As tragic as that is for your sister, what I meant is mammals were meant to stay within their own species. Can you imagine what would happen to the fox population if every fox in here decided to mate with someone not their own species?”

“Oh, my gods!” cried Nick, bringing his paws to his face. “Harmony might be achieved!”

The vixen who had spoken up was the only one who laughed. Both teens exchanged smirks at the wolf’s baffled expression. Her eyes flicked up at the clock, before landing back onto Nick. With a slightly steely look, she clapped her paws as she gave him a strained smile.

“And, on that note, we’ll stop here for the day.”

The low hum the other students gathering their things and shuffling out the door was ignored as Nick glowered at the teacher. Leaflets and work sheets in paw, he stood and trudged to the door. The class had been held in a small classroom just outside the lobby of the hospital, so Nick had a clear view of the receptionist desk.

The hippo behind the counter smiled at him as he approached.

“Hey, Nicky.” She flicked through a few sheets of paper, before pausing at one and handing it to him. “Your mom’s is assisting with surgery right now, but she told me to give you this.”

Waving him off as he finished reading his chore list, Nick headed for the double doors, still thinking about what the teacher had said. If the others had been so against interspecies relationships, how would they react if a predator and prey got together. His mother made it clear that she didn’t mind, his brother couldn’t care less, and Skye had no room to talk.

But Judy….

Asking her out would make her vulnerable to abuse and ridicule. If she even agreed. After the kiss he surprised her with, part of him wasn’t looking forward to camp that afternoon. There was a slight possibility that the shock of his surprise move had turn into very real anger she might take out on him.

Though he was pretty sure her brother would at least be reasonable. Or, at the very least, understanding.

Stepping into the warm mid-morning sun, he caught a glance of the vixen from class. His ears picked up with interest as he watch a kudu doe wrap her arm around the vixen’s waist and rest her head on her shoulder. The two waited at a crosswalk, giggling and snuggling with each other, oblivious to the glares and stares they received.

“Star night…” He muttered absently.

He smiled more to himself than anything else as he watched the pair walk away together. An image of him and Judy laying on their backs, side by side, gazing at the stars projected onto the ceiling of the Natural History Museum came to his mind. Without a doubt, she would be angry at him for stealing a kiss, but with enough tenacity, he could probably win her over.

And get her to agree on a date with him. …………….

Jack noticed something different about Judy this morning. She seemed distant, her responses to his questions and quips were vague, and her eyes kept flicking over to the cafe door. The striped buck had exchanged a few confused looks with Bobby, Kari, and Sandra.

Though Jon simply smirked.

Jack had too been distracted from his interlude with Skye to notice how peculiar his little sister was acting when she arrived home the night before. A distracted greeting was given when she entered the cafe and practically floated upstairs. Jon had noted the dazed look on her face, how it nearly mirrored her brother’s, and laughed. Now, the following morning, the raccoon was having a blast watching his bosses make moon eyes at each other while Judy monitored the front door with increasingly obvious disappointment.

“Our little doe looks a bit lost, eh, Skye?” Jon nudged her with his elbow as they watched Judy move from table to table listlessly. The vixen simply shook her head at him and smiled.

Every jingle of the bell had Judy turning in the direction of the door. Ears popped up in excitement, only to fall when she got a look at who entered. Jon picked up on the fact that the new comers were older than thirteen and not red fox todds. Jack, however, was completely baffled by her behavior.

The raccoon concluded he was either ear deep in denial or just truly clueless.

“Judy, Bun-bun, are you feeling ok?” Concerned blue eyes watched as she trudged around the corner with a bus tub in her arms. He stretched a paw out to press to her forehead, as she leaned away from him. “You’ve been acting odd all day. Sweetheart, are you sick?”

“I’m fine, Jack,” she ducked past him towards the kitchen. “I’m just… thinking… about camp…”

She flashed him an unconvincing smile, the sight of which had Skye and Jon withholding snickers.

“Oh, yes,” agreed the vixen. “Camp. Very distracting.”

She grinned and winked at the doe, who blushed and hurried away. Jack turned to give Skye a puzzled look. She simply shook her head and turned back to the register.

“I’m seriously worried,” he said as he leaned back against the counter next to her, arms crossed as he watched Judy absently straighten up the kitchen. “She usually has, like, seven million complaints by now. And yet, she barely said more than a few words to me.”

“It’s just a crush, Jack.” Skye smiled as she counted out change and passed it to a mother beaver juggling her coffee, treats, and twins. “You just have to let it run its course.”

“…Crush?!”

Jon had been taking a sip of his water, only to choke on it at the sight of Jack’s horrified expression. Amidst the giggles of his workers, the striped buck narrowed his gaze at his sister’s back before turning to the vixen.

“What do you mean ‘crush’?”

With a roll of her eyes, Skye patiently cleared her throat and explained it to him.

“Jack, remember when I told you my brother had the hots for your little sister?”

The buck’s ears flushed a bit as he nodded sheepishly. “Well, it’s entirely possible it’s not all one sided.”

Still gasping for breath, Jon put a companionable arm around his boss.

“Listen,” he started after clearing his throat, “Judy’s growing up. And part of growing up is her starting to figure out what she’s attracted to. Hence, she now has a crush.”

“But…” Jack’s voice quivered a bit as he looked at the raccoon, who fell away from him with a sympathetic smile. “She’s my little Bun- Bun….”

“Oh, Jack.” Skye linked her arm in his, her free paw coming up to give his a comforting pat. Tugging him away from the group congregating around the registers, she lead him back to the kitchen. Judy’s ears were down, her focus obviously not on the pile of dishes she was sorting through.

“You have four clients coming in today, including Fru Fru Big, who’ll be here in twenty minutes. So, let’s put a pin in this and focus on work. Afterwards, we can brush each other’s fur and sob about how quickly time flies.”

A wave of affection came over her as he gave another sad glance at the doe before he nodded and set about preparing his cake samples. Wanting to ease his concerns, she leaned into him, causing the buck to inhale sharply.

“And if you’re good,” she continued, lowing her muzzle to speak softly into his ear. “And things go well today, we can continue our little… ‘discussion’ from last night.”

Jack’s ears popped up at that, his eyes snapping to her. He blushed and smiled when she winked at him before turning to leave the kitchen.

“Oh, and an Emma Longrass called. She was confirming an appointment with you today,” Skye added before she turned back towards the lobby only to be halted by her boss.

“Actually, I told her the appointment was with you.” Jack replied.

“Oooooohhhhh, Jack…” The vixen whined and turned big blue eyes to him, making him smile. “Do I hafta?”

“I wonder if she’ll do that whipped cream thing again.”

Both turned to look at Judy in surprise as she loaded the cart with clean dishes. Skye narrowed her eyes at the doe before turning back to a stricken looking Jack.

“WHAT whipped cream thing?” Skye demanded.

“You know,” Judy continued, cutting off her brother’s attempts to appease the vixen. “The move where you dip your finger into your whipped cream and then lick it off. And never take your eyes off the mammal you’re doing it in front of.”

The last mug was loaded up before the younger rabbit started pushing towards the coffee bar.

“Just curious to know if she’ll do it to you again, Jack.” She pushed past the adults, calling over her shoulder as she went. “Let me know!”

Their gazes turned back to each other, Jack looking horrified, Skye looking accusing.

“Kits…” He said with a forced laugh. “They say the darnedest things.”

“That they do.” Skye crossed her arms and tapped her foot waiting for Jack to explain.

“She’s an old class mate who said she can get us a discount on advertising. That’s why I scheduled her appointment with you…” His ears dropped as he looked at her. “Just so she knows she doesn’t stand a chance.”

“Who?” asked Sandra as she went to the order fridge.

“Emma Longrass,” spat Skye, still scowling at the idea of another trying to seduce her buck. Sandra’s face gave her reason to pause though.

“Oh, my gods,” she exclaimed with a laugh. “Are you really jealous of that doe? I’ve bought milk that lasts longer than her interest in a buck. Seriously, Skye, dangle a semi attractive hobo in front of her and Jack will be ancient history.”

“You know her?”

“She dated three of my brothers…” Sandra’s face went dark for a moment. “At the same time.” With a snort, Sandra returned back to the lobby with the order she was looking for.

“Little slut…” Skye heard Sandra mutter under her breath as she walked back to the lobby.

“Skye,” Jack’s hesitant voice brought her attention back to him, his big blue eyes almost pleading with her. “Please…” He took a step forward, terrified she was going to step away from him.

The petty part of her was more than tempted.

“I have zero interest in her. The only reason I set up anything at all is because her company is the one of the best ad agencies in Zootopia. And if there’s anyone who can put her in her place, it would be you.”

The vixen narrowed her eyes at the buck.

“What is this, Jack?”

The buck took another step closer to her, a paw going to her face to brush the soft fur of her cheek. Her gaze didn’t soften, making his stomach drop, though the brush of her tail across his feet filled him with hope. Casting a quick look out the order window- and the several pairs of ears turned to the conversation- the buck stepped forward.

“This is something that has the potential to be real.” He slid his paw from her muzzle to take hers, running a thumb over her pads as he raised them, before bringing them to his face.

His lips pressed into them as he breathed in the scent of peony and amber that always seemed to cling to her. His eyes closed as she gave in and brushed the fine fur of his muzzle, making him breath deep before opening them again. The slight smile she wore made him unreasonably happy and relieved.

“I want this, Skye,” he muttered. “I’ll call her back and cancel if you want. You’re the one I want and the one can’t stop thinking about. No one has ever pulled a reaction out of me quite like you.”

“That’s true!” called out Judy and Sandra.

Skye laughed at that, before stepping close enough to nuzzle the top of Jack’s head.

“Make those samples, mister.”

She suddenly pulled away, turning quickly to head back to the lobby, letting her tail drag over his front as she went. A sultry smile was sent over her shoulder at the buck’s groan of disappointment.

Pausing by the doorway, she tipped him a wink. “I have a meeting I need to prepare for.” ……………..

Dave looked down at his friend. They were both back by the precinct obstacle course, stretching as they waited for the other junior cadets to show up. Nick’s eyes were once again trained on the entrance, his tail gently thumping against the ground with nerves. Ordinarily he would have had a lot of fun tormenting the todd, especially after seeing him steal a kiss from Judy.

But Brook’s odd behavior was still bothering him. He had messaged her when he got home, several times actually, only to be ignored. With Nick preoccupied, Dave wasn’t quite sure how to approach the situation. When the todd suddenly stilled, brown eyes looked over at the approaching bunny. Sans tigress, much to his dismay.

A calculating smirk was sent their way as Judy took up a spot to stretch. She didn’t need to look up as the two males approached, her ears perking at the sound of their paw steps.

“Ready for today, Wilde?”

“Oh, you know it, Hopps.” Nick bent to touch his toes, grinning over at her. “I can’t wait to add sparring to the list of things I beat you at.”

“Don’t count your carrots,” she remarked, straightening up and putting paws on her hips. “After all, I distinctly remember being able to whip your tail in the park.”

“You got lucky, bunny.” Nick stood to his full height and copied her pose.

“Did I?” The todd gave a sharp inhale when she stepped closer to him, ears folding forward and eyes wide as she batted her lashes at him. “If that’s the case, then if you win, I’ll give you a surprise. I win, you knock a day off the ice cream bet.”

Green eyes twinkled mischievously, his tail wagging so fast it thumped hard enough against Dave’s leg that the wolf felt a small bruise form.

“Done!” Paws shook, both mammals grinning at the image of their own victory over the other. “Sooo… What kind of surprise?”

With a quirk of her brows, the bunny turned away and resumed her stretching, her back turned to the pair of them.

“Guess you’ll just have to see…” she said in a sing song voice.

Nick shifted uncomfortably, his gaze resting on her and all the stretches she was doing, before he suddenly took off, mumbling about the bathroom.

“What was that all about?” Judy asked in surprise, staring after him. She gave

Dave a speculative glance which he returned with a helpless shrug. “Brook said she’s going to be late, by the way.”

“Oh…” He lowered his eyes to the ground, gathering his nerves as she went back to her task. “Hey, Judy?”

The rabbit looked up from her stretches again, eyes filled with curiosity.

“Is Brook ok?” His feet shuffled as he looked down at them, ears back and tail dragging. “I mean, is there anything I did to make her hate me?”

Judy smiled kindly at him as she shook her head. “That’s something you’re going to need to ask her. But she’ll be ok. She’s just feeling… sensitive…. right now.”

Dave opened his mouth to respond only to be cut off by a smooth voice.

“Excuse me.”

Both teenagers turned in surprise at the new comer. Standing just a bit shorter than Nick was marble fox. His fur was a bit longer than the red todd’s, though impeccably kept. Snowy white ran up his arms, disappearing into a blue t-shirt. Grey and black sprinkled from the top of his head to his ears, he viewed the world with golden brown eyes and an obscenely confident smile.

The Zootropolis accent didn’t make Dave feel any better about him.

“Hi! I’m new to Zootopia.” A paw stretched out to the doe, his eyes lit upon her. “I’m Kody Marmoreal.”

“Oh, um, hi! I’m Judy. Judy Hopps.” Her small paw became enveloped in his, a small ‘meep’ escaping her as he raised it slowly. Brown eyes became half lidded in tender look as he smiled softly.

“Hmmmm.” He paused with her paw close to his muzzle, a slight purr of approval rumbling out. “What a pretty name, for a pretty doe.”

Dave’s own eyes narrowed at Kody, watching him make moves on his best friend’s female, a growl almost escaping him as a kiss was pressed to the back of her paw. Movement from his peripheral caused him to glance at Nick coming back from the bathroom. Panic filled him as his friend stopped in his tracks, the other todd zeroing in on Judy and Kody.

Green eyes filled with hostility as his fur puffed up in agitation. The wolf was surprised at the speed displayed as Nick moved towards the trio, coming to rest beside the bunny as her paw was released. Kody’s eyes flicked to him before refocusing back on Judy, nose flaring to take in her scent.

“So, Judy, I’m looking for a tour guide to show me around the city.” The other two males tried not to scoff as he smiled down at her. “You wouldn’t happen to know anyone who’s interested. Do you?”

“Oh, well I-” Judy’s words were interrupted by Nick, who took a step forward to put himself between his crush and the new todd.

“Actually, she does.” A paw was thrusted towards the intruder, a look of contempt barely masked with a strained grin. “Nick Wilde. No one knows this city better than me.”

“Is that right?” Paw accepted, Dave had to keep himself from rolling his eyes as the two todds tried to out grip the other. “Well, I’m sure there’s nothing better for helping your geography than exploring your surroundings.”

Their limbs were obviously aching when they let go, both refused to show any discomfort or pain. Judy looked up to Dave, who merely shrugged.

“If the lovely lady is up to the task,” Kody continued as he smiled down at her again.

This time neither male watching the exchange bothered keeping in their growls. The new todd barely spared them a glance, keeping his gaze on the blushing bunny.

Judy opened her mouth to respond before catching sight of Brook. With her head down and shoulders slumped, the tigress was trying to make herself as inconspicuous as possible as she crept to the group waiting for their instructor.

Still blushing, Judy mumbled an apology as she excused herself. With a small smile to Nick, the bunny darted over to her friend, leaving the wolf with two very riled up foxes.

“What do you think you doing, fox?” Nick’s eyes burned into his competition’s.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” With a smirk, Kody followed after the doe as Chief Pride walked in.

The polar bear who lead the camp last time was right behind him, bags filled with boxing gloves and other gear thrown over their shoulders.

“Line up, campers!” Her voice cut the idle chit chat from the youths as they scrambled for their spots.

A low growl came from Nick as they both watched Kody take a spot next to Judy and Brook. Something was said to the tigress that brought the first smile Dave had seen in while to her muzzle. Jealousy bloomed in his chest as she ducked her head at the obvious compliment, whatever it may have been.

“Asshole,” he breathed, teeth clenched and eyes narrowed at the new todd making the two females giggle. ………….

Words didn’t properly describe the emotion Sandra felt when Emma Longrass walked in. Mostly because it was an intense combination. Anger was, of course, the front runner. With memories of her brothers brawling in the front yard of her childhood home back in Bunnyburrow while Emma watched with glee, anger ran hot in her veins.

There was also annoyance and aggression, mostly out of loyalty to Skye. Her new boss may have only been a week into the gig, but Sandra was an admirer of anyone who could make Jack not think about work. It was why she loved having Judy around. Anything for him to remember there was life outside of the kitchen. And the fact that the buck hadn’t been on a date the entire time she had worked for him made her respect for the vixen grow.

It took a lot for a female to catch his attention.

Jealousy was a bit of a surprise as the shorter, cream colored doe watched those long, trim legs glide towards the counter. Accentuated by a plaid, pleated skirt and white button down, the matching blazer adding a professional look to her. Sandra couldn’t help but glared at the physically perfect bunny doe coming towards the register.

“My, my,” the words came out as a humored drawl, with just enough country twang still in it to awaken Sandra’s lust, much to her embarrassment. “If it isn’t little Sandy Cotintale. You grew up!”

Emma pulled her sunglasses down the bridge of her nose to give a critical glance at Sandra. “Or should I say, out?”

Those last words were followed by a small laugh at her own joke. The other bunny doe felt her unwanted attraction vanish as she gritted her teeth to keep from replying. He may not have liked her, but Jack would be furious if Sandra rose to the bait. And she respected her boss enough to act better than the two-timing slut in front of her.

Sunglasses were removed fully and folded, the stem of them hooked onto the front of her shirt. Hazel eyes glanced around the cafe as arms crossed.

“Where’s Jack? I have an appointment with him at one-thirty.”

“Actually,” came a voice as sweet as sugar from the lobby.

Both does looked up to see Skye walking towards them, a devil may care smirk on her muzzle. Sandra had been so distracted with the register, she hadn’t noticed Fru Fru Big being settled onto a table with her fiancé, courtesy of Jack. She smirked back at her boss as the vixen’s paw trailed over the shoulders of the seated rabbit buck. He looked up at her as she passed, an expression of longing on his face, before returning to his appointment. If the shrew couple minded, their grins were the best act Sandra had ever seen.

“Your appointment is with me.”

Kari paused with a bus bucket on her hip in the middle of the lobby as Bobby leaned back against the wall with a look of anticipation. Jon could be seen peeking through the order window in curiosity, his own appointment due to show up any moment. Sandra herself merely crossed her arms as the two females sized each other up.

Emma had tensed at the sight of the fox, her ears dropping briefly before rising again. Her look of distaste as she took in the gorgeous vixen made a snicker of delight work its way from Sandra’s belly. Her joy only grew at the scowl Emma sent her. The new doe flinched as Skye stepped forward and extended her paw to her, claws casually extended.

“Skye Wilde.”

The vixen’s smile was enough to rot teeth. Blue eyes never left the doe’s face as she took in Skye’s trim form, from the well-worn jeans to the professional black button-down. Casually dressed as she was, Skye could have worn a potato sack and make it seem like the next big trend. Emma’s eyes flared with jealousy when they came to rest back on the vixen’s face.

“Pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Wilde-”

“It’s miss, darlin’.” Tipping a wink to her, Skye turned with a swish of her tail and headed over to a table in the corner opposite Jack and Fru Fru. “You comin’?”

There was a strange sound that echoed around the cafe. Multiple pairs of eyes were pulled from what they were focused on to the bunny behind the counter. Sandra had attempted to curtail the gleeful laughter that spilled over. Deciding to cover it with a cough, the results were a loud squeak that drew everyone’s attention.

Though a bit red in the ears, she didn’t look the least bit sorry for it.

Skye simply smirked and kept her gaze on Emma. The other doe gave Sandra a final glare and took a seat opposite of the vixen. Hazel met blue, cold dislike met warm amusement, the two females considered each other for a heartbeat before Emma cleared her throat and started her pitch.

“Ten bucks says Skye gets hot coffee splashed in her face,” whispered Kari to her coworkers, the bus tub being taken by Jon.

“I got twenty that says she makes her cry before the cops are called,” countered Bobby.

“Fifty to them both being arrested,” added Jon.

“Let the games begin,” replied Sandra, watching as the two females converse. ………….

“Now, Hopps,” Nick grinned at her, watching as she gave some experimental jabs with the gloves on. “Don’t expect me to go easy on you, just because you’re a cute, little bunny.”

She sent a glare his way, which caused him to grin as she gave a series of hops, shaking out the tension from her arms. A smile curled her lips as she slowed her warm up. With a grin of her own, she readied her stance and focused on him.

“Please don’t. I like a challenge.” She winked at him, earning a speculative eyebrow raise from the todd.

Their warm up run had been uneventful, aside from the fact that Nick found himself running next to Kody a majority of the time. The new todd’s eyes had been focused on Judy’s tail, much to Nick’s annoyance. Never mind the fact Nick himself had a hard time focusing on anything other than that. That was beside the point. And it was nothing an ‘accidental’ elbow jab couldn’t cure.

“Now remember! You’re not trying to hurt each other!” Major Friedkin gave slightly worried look between the pair.

The others had been put with mammals closely matching their weight classes, but Judy had hopped right up to Nick, shoving a pair of gloves into his chest before leading him to a mat. A move that delighted him, seeing as Daniel Woods and that new show off, Kody, were completely disregarded as challengers. The sweet smile she had sent over her shoulder had him hurrying after her.

And the swift side step she had given Daniel had Nick sending the woodchuck a smug look of triumph as he snapped his gear on. Friedkin had only showed them basic defense, nothing more complicated than blocks and dodges. But while she knew Nick and what his dad had taught him, a sit in at an old friend’s youth boxing class had shown her what the bunny could do.

“Just jab and block!” Friedkin looked from one to the other. “Jab. And. Block.”

And with that, she stepped back.

Nick waited for her to move in. Braced and ready, he bounced slightly in anticipation before giving into impatience. His first step forward, she made her move. It happened so quick, he wasn’t even sure what hit him. Extending his arm to jab at her, she had easily dodged it, ducking under it before hooking her foot around his knee.

His leg flew out from under him before he had a chance to act on the movement. Sprawled out on the mat, staring up at the sky, he gave a light groan as he pushed himself up to look over at her. She bounced on the other side of the mat, small smirk on her muzzle, as they met eyes.

“Now, Slick,” she lectured, putting gloved paws on her hips. “You promised not to go easy on me.”

Her head tilted in a playful challenge, she resumed her bouncing as he scrambled to his feet and charged. Only to get knocked back down again. She dodged his forward attack, one foot strategically placed to insure he would stumble over it, his outstretched arm was once more grabbed. He had used more force opening jars for his mother than what Judy used to flip him onto his back.

“Oh, by the way,” came her amused voice, cutting through his daze. She grinned as he sat up and looked to her. “My Uncle Terry is the March Hare.”

“The boxer?” Nick asked as he scrambled back up, his eyes much warier.

“Yup.” The doe grinned as he gulped.

The rest of the class was a bit fuzzy for the fox. While in reality, the sparring had only lasted twenty minutes, tops, Nick felt like he spent hours being thrown around by the light weight champion’s niece. Most of the class had stopped their own rounds to watch the pair duke it out, Daniel and the new jerk face, Kody, loudly jeering whenever Judy landed a jab or flipped him.

At the end of it, though, once their instructor had her fill of his many humiliations, Judy tugged the gloves off and reached down to Nick. Smiling, she helped him to his feet, before shaking his paw. She gave a slight tsk before frowning at the slightly aching todd.

“What?” he asked, with raised eyebrows as he stretched out the stiffness forming.

“I never won a fight with such little effort,” she said. “And one day down, four more to go!”

At that Nick raised his eyebrows. “Excuse me?”

“Our bet.” Her face dripped smug as she eyed him. “I won, so only four days left in the ice cream bet.”

“Carrots, there are seven days in the week.”

“But business days are five.”

“Are we conducting business? No, no we are not.”

“Oh,” she responded, her ears and eyes dropping as she pulled her gloves to her chest. Taking a step closer to him, she looked up into his eyes, his muzzle falling open as he tried to remember to speak. “And here I thought you were all business. Well, I guess I can live with six days. I’m sure I’ll have plenty of opportunities to knock some more off this little wager.”

She stepped back, her face suddenly smiling sweetly up at him, before bouncing away. Muzzle still open, he barely noticed Dave coming up beside him.

“I let her win,” he said, watching her go.

“Sure you did,” agreed Dave with a nod.

“Really!” he insisted.

“I believe you.”

The two males grinned at each other, before turning back to where Judy stood, her gloves being handed over to the instructor. Their expressions grew darker as Kody came to stand beside her. Nick’s blood boiled as the todd reached over to smooth a mussed patch of fur on her head, watching his paw linger much longer than necessary.

Even worse was the blush that spread across her ears as they perked towards someone who wasn’t him.

“I swear, Wilde, I did not spend the last six months watching you drool and pine over this doe only to have you let her get scooped up by some douche.” Dave bent over him and gave an irritated growl. “Make. Your. Move!”

He suddenly strode away, casting one last scowl at the fox as he did. Nick frowned after him, watching as he tried to catch up with Brook… Only to get rebuffed. She saw him coming and very obviously quickened her steps towards the exit to out run and avoid him.

Seeing his friend’s confused look made Nick feel slightly better. Added to that were the dark looks Daniel Woods was sending his way, jealous that Judy didn’t even spare him a glance. Only to have it vanish when he realized Judy was still walking with… with…

HIM.

That’s it, he thought as he watched them leave together. I’m asking her out.

TONIGHT. ………….

“Well?”

Kody had turned the corner away from the precinct, after saying goodbye to Judy, when the voice popped up over his shoulder. Without turning around or slowing, he smirked as his cousin came up beside him.

“I got this in the bag.” He cast her a glance, noting her pleased expression.

“Another day or so, and she’ll forget about your boyfriend. Then you can settle for being his second choice.”

Natasha scowled at him.

“I’m not going to be his second choice!” she hissed back. “I’m just going to remind him what he’s interested in. And let you worry about perverting yourself by dating outside your species.”

“Honey, when they’re as hot as her, I can take the hit.” Kody’s expression darkened as they walked. “Not that I’m complaining, but why are you so focused on Wilde anyway?”

“You think I’m going to pass up the chance to date Matt Wilde’s kit? Do you know how much more popular I’ll be if we’re seen together?” She smirked to herself at the thought of the fame she might get for dating Nick Wilde. “The Wildes are one of the most respected fox families in the city and I plan on becoming part of it. Once that stupid rabbit is out of the picture, it should be cake getting him to go out with me.”

Kody shook his head at his cousin as they walked.

“Tasha, you are an ice queen.”

With a sly wink, she nodded. “Proud of it, babe.” …………….

Judy walked into an odd scene when she returned to the cafe. She was expecting it to be quiet, like it normally was on Saturdays. Had expected the usual Saturday crowd, sitting at their computers, tapping away as they enjoyed coffee and the treats The Perk was now known for. Saturdays were usually easy and slow.

This was a mad house.

There was a line out the door, each mammal eagerly trying to look over the heads of the ones in front of them. A few hippos, rhinos, and elephants waited outside, their bodies much too big to squeeze through the door. Their faces lit up when the smaller mammals they had sent inside came out with their snacks.

Judy shook her head in amazement before braving the crowd. Extra paws had been called in, mammals Jack kept on the payroll for days like this. Though they normally worked around Christmas time. The doe herself braced to jump into the mix where ever she was needed. A quick glance around found her brother taking notes from a small shrew couple as they sampled bits of cake. Jon was doing the same with a cheetah couple, who were eagerly taking in the scene through mouthfuls Furench silk.

Tying on the apron Sandra had tossed to her, the young doe turned from her brother and his assistant to another scene that made her happier than a busy cafe: Emma Longrass sitting in silent fury across from Skye. The vixen held paperwork in her paws, each page carelessly flipped through with red pen. With a smirk as smug as Nick’s, she pointed out something to the doe and shook her head before crossing it out and scribbling in the margins.

With a light laugh, Judy couldn’t resist hopping over under the pretense of clearing the table.

“No, no! This here?” Skye turned the paper she was looking at towards the doe.

“Definitely does not work for us. This market is completely antipredator, not to mention they aren’t big on caffeine. What’s the point of advertising a coffee shop in a place that doesn’t enjoy caffeine?”

Judy heard Emma grind her teeth through a strained smile. “Of course. We can always switch out that for the university.”

“All of them.” Skye flicked the page as she shot the doe a grin. “You can accomplish that, right, Ms. Longrass?”

“Of course, Ms. Wilde.”

With a giggle, Judy turned away and headed over to her brother’s table. She paused in front of it, collecting the small stack of tiny plates and cutlery as the shrew couple described their dream cake.

“Oh my god,” drawled the female, her eyes as wide as her grin. “We have to get the red velvet with cream cheese frosting and pink buttercream roses. It will be to die for!”

“Popular choice,” agreed Jack, pulling a color sample from his notes. “These are the pinks I recommend and I just need to know how many tiers.”

“Well, we’re keeping it intimate, so there’s really only going to be around fifty guests, mostly our families. Majority of the party will be shrews.” The female mused out loud, twirling her long hair in her paws.

“Dearest, don’t forget the bears,” interjected the male as he placed a comforting paw on his fiancée’s arm. “Your father would be hurt if we forgot to include them in this decision.”

“Drat it!” Her brows furrowed again. One hind paw tapped the table impatiently as she did the math in her head. “How much cake is that?”

“I would do one, two layered shrew sized red velvet and the other a large, single layered white cake with lemon filling.”

The couple and Jack looked up at Judy, who froze at their bewildered expressions.

Her muzzle opened and closed before clearing her throat.

“It’s just,” she continued nervously. “The shrew size my brother makes is more than enough for each guest to have seconds and still leave the top for your one-year anniversary. And red velvet is a popular flavor for weddings and white cake a classic stand by for those who aren’t fans. Not to mention, Jack’s lemon filling has been named best in Zootopia. It’s the same filling that’s in the lemon tart up front.”

Silence followed the doe’s rambling, making her wish she had never opened her mouth.

“Oh. My. Gawd!” shrieked the little female. “That’s poifect!” Her paws flipped through the binder of notes next to her. “OH! You are a freaking genius! Jackie, please tell me you can pull off something like this?”

A piece of paper was pulled free, its small size making Jack reach for his magnifying glass to view it. The surprisingly tasteful groom’s cake design made the buck nod in satisfaction.

“Done and done!” he said with smile, lowering the glass and noting the account.

“All I need now is the date and you’ll be all set.” The little shrew nodded excitedly at him before beaming up at Judy again.

“Thank you so much for that!” she squeaked, holding a paw out to her. “You are a life savior!”

Judy blushed and smiled back, accepting her paw.

“Love your hair,” she managed to say. The shrew’s expression melted into look of pure joy.

“Aww! Thank you!” Judy grinned and walked away catching Skye’s eye as she did.

Skye winked at her before turning back to Emma. Still looking as though she was trying to hide her irritation, the doe finished packing up her paperwork and stood. Escorting her to the door coincided with Jack walking the shrews out, each one perched on a shoulder. The female was jabbering in his ear about her final notes regarding her cake while her fiancée smiled on in contentment.

Emma pulled her attention from her own host to give Jack another sultry grin.

Waiting until both shrews were passed onto the polar bear waiting just outside the door, the rabbit doe reached a paw to grasp the front of his shirt. Ears went up in shock as he was pulled towards her, Emma’s compact body pressed up against his.

“I think you may owe me dinner, Jack,” she said coyly, mistaking the buck’s blush for one of pleasure not mortification.

“I a-actually have plans for the evening,” he responded, extracting himself from her and stepping away. Emma pouted playfully in hopes of tempting him.

“What a shame.” A paw stretched out towards him again. “Who’s the lucky lady?”

“Me.” Skye stood beside him, lacing her paw with his own and wrapping her tail around his ankles. “It was pleasure meeting you, Miss Longrass.”

The doe looked shock for moment, her nose twitching as she looked from their joined paws to the dumbstruck look on Jack’s face as he looked up at the vixen. Judy waited for the explosion. But to her surprise, Emma just sighed. The outstretched paw went out to shake Skye’s, the vixen’s expression slightly suspicious.

“You really are a lucky lady,” she said with a wistful smile and look that bordered on respect. “Take care of him.” She winked over at Jack. “He’s a really, really good guy.”

She turned to leave, the pair of them smiling in relief at the outcome.

“Oh, and interspeices couples get an extra fifteen percent off!” Emma grinned at their shocked expressions and continued on her way.

Both turned back to the busy cafe, still paw in paw, heading to the register.

“So…” Skye turned to look at Jack. “That went well.”

“Well as in ‘continue our discussion’ well?” he asked hopefully.

She simply laughed and released him, giving the buck a slight push towards the kitchen. “Your next appointment is in five, Romeo.”

He laughed with her and soon everyone fell into the rhythm of their work. Jack and Jon successfully wowed their other clients, sealing in their orders for cakes and, in one case, cupcakes. The line moved at a steady pace, though the selection of baked goods dwindled significantly. Everyone for the most part was content with how the day was turning out.

For an hour after she had gotten back from camp, Judy mainly bussed tables and did dishes. And, as in the morning, she did it without complaint. It was brainless work, allowing her to think and get lost in her daydreams. Daydreams that used to be all about her future as a cop. Now, they involved Nick.

How he looked at her, how he smelled, how his ears and tail perked up when she spoke to him.

Gideon’s words had been in the back of her mind since the last day of school: “He has a crush on you, too.”

But it wasn’t that she had a crush. She was Judy Hopps! Jude the Dude! Future cop, fearless, practical, and able to think from other places besides between her legs. She wasn’t like her sisters who were batting their lashes at every buck who smiled at them. And she certainly wasn’t crushing on a male who insulted her and goaded her into fights.

No matter how attractive he was. Besides, Kody was far more appealing. That accent, that fur, those eyes.

He’s boring, though, she thought.

He’s just polite, came the reasoning.

No, there’s something off about him. Something that keeps you from thinking about him until you force yourself to.

I just met the guy! That’s just me being-

Honest? She frowned at the thought. Be honest. You just met Nick and you’ve spent the past week obsessing about him. Kody just isn’t as interesting. And you’re not a fan of his scent.

Kody smells just fine!

In that, he smells clean. But like sandalwood - you hate sandalwood. Nick smells like violets and cotton blossoms. He really does smell so much better… And you were always an admirer of green eyes.

The jingling of the door bells brought her attention back to reality. At long last, the line had shortened enough so it didn’t wind outside, giving the bells a chance to do their jobs. Her standard greeting died on her lips when she saw who it was.

“Nick? What are you doing here?”

Judy looked wide eyed at the todd standing in front of her, his fur rumpled and expression flustered. He still wore his exercise clothes, with his paws tugging at the hem of his shirt. Skye and Jack both paused in their restocking of the pastry case to glance over at the pair. Their sudden stop made the other workers follow suite and look their way. Customers, puzzled at the sudden halt in service followed their gazes with curious looks.

To her embarrassment, Judy realized everyone was watching them. Nick gave a nervous grin to the many eyes focused on the unexpected entertainment as he fruitlessly opened and closed his mouth.

“Ummm,” he starting to take a step closer, eyes finding Skye’s. The amused look she gave him seemed to make him deflate as a paw gestured in her direction. “My sister…”

He cleared his throat and looked at Judy again. “I just came to see my sister…” Disappointment blossomed inside her as he started to walk backwards towards the counter.

“Oh…” Her ears dropped as she turned, bus bucket still in paw. Though the sound of his throat being cleared had her looking back up. She was surprised find he had moved closer to her, twisting his paws together.

“Star night!” he exclaimed, startling her into almost dropping the bucket. She looked at him with wide eyes, taking in his frazzled fur and petrified look.

“What?”

“S-star ni-night…” With another clearing of his throat, his fur returned to normal though he didn’t look any less nervous. “The-there’s a star night… at the Museum of Natural History. Tonight. I was, ah-hmm! Wondering if you wanted to go with me? Maybe…”

The bunny doe stared slack jawed at him, her brain trying to register the words he had just said.

“I have to ask my brother.”

Both teens looked over at Jack, whose ears shot up upon realizing every mammal in the cafe now watched him for his response. The buck looked around, eyes resting on Skye. She grinned and gave him a light nudge with her hip. A defeated look crossed his face before turning back to the pair in the lobby. With an eyeroll, Jack nodded his head.

Nick looked back her, ears perked and body tense. Silence stretched as she met his eyes, the burst of encouragement Jack’s nod had given him wearing off when she didn’t reply. Lowering his head and moving to the exit had Judy finding her voice.

“Sure.” Pausing with head snapped back towards her, a small smile played on his muzzle that grew as hers crept up. “What time?”

“Seven.”

“Meet me here at six thirty?”

“Yeah,” he grinned and nodded eagerly. “Ok! Sure! Six thirty sounds great.”

“Awesome!” Judy felt her ears grow hot, though they remained perched over her head.

The todd was beaming as he walked backwards towards the door, giving distracted apologies to anyone he ran into. His eyes remained locked onto Judy, who was smiling back as he left. Nick was almost through the door when another voice rang out.

“Bye, Nicky!”

Ears flattened as his eyes moved over to his sister, who waggled her fingers at him with smirk on her face.

“Oh… Uh, later, Skye!” And with that, Nick ran away, goofy grin getting wider as he did.

There was a scattering of applause from those still in line causing Judy to blush but her smile stayed intact. Butterflies filled her belly as she mentally looked through her wardrobe to figure out what to wear. As outfits were vetoed, a loud voice coming from the register crashed her train of thought.

“-absolute disgrace!”

Her ears perked up and swiveled around.

“What sort of big brother are you to let your sweet, helpless little sister go out with a bit of vermin like him! Are you looking forward to seeing her hurt and broken? Because that’s what going to happen! He’s going to use and abuse that innocent little doe to get the one thing bunnies are good for! You, sir, should be ashamed of yourself!”

Quiet murmurings wrapped themselves around Judy as she left the table she was cleaning for the register. Jack stood behind the counter, paws on his hips, facing an ewe who gripped her young lamb by the hoof. Behind him was Skye looking equally furious with Kari not too far off. Sandra and Bobby were exchanging incredulous looks with a hint of amusement just under the surface.

A few of the mammals in the cafe nodded in agreement, some going so far as to leave their places in line and head for the exit. Others looked on in outrage at the sheep. The rest were either grumbling about the line being held up or gleefully watching the drama unfold.

“First off, if there is a single mammal here who thinks that my little sister is helpless, they’re in for some serious, fucking disappointment.” The ewe gasped in shock at the swear word and went to muffle the ears of her delighted looking lamb.

“Second,” continued Skye, Jack letting her step forward with a paw pointed towards the irate patron. “You don’t even know my little brother. All you see is a fox, not the kind-hearted, hardworking, funny todd he actually is.”

Jack reached up to give her free paw a supportive squeeze, not missed by the ewe, who’s eyes widened in disgust.

“This place is an abomination and you and everyone who works here or supports this business is going to hell!” And with that, she turned hoof and stormed out. There was another round of applause as a few of the patrons cheered for Jack and Skye. Both nodded to the crowd and exchanged smirks, before Skye clapped her paws together.

“Back to work everyone! We’ve got mammals to please!” She gave Jack another grin who returned it with a pointed look over at the coffee maker. Understanding, she turned to the line of mammals waiting. “Everyone in line gets a free small hot or iced coffee or tea on the house!”

And that was more than enough to make their customers happy. ……………..

“SHE SAID YES!”

Nick had been muttering the words under his breath as he danced from Savanna Central Perk back to his home. Now in the quiet of the living room, he jumped onto the couch, bouncing with excitement, shouting the words at the top of his lungs. With an almost maniacal laugh, he jumped from the couch back to the floor. Greg had rushed from his bedroom to where his brother was throwing his fists in the air.

“Nick, what the fuck are you-”

“EVERYBODY MAMBO!” With a yelp, the older todd was grabbed and spun around the room.

“Why-” Greg was twisted one way. “-are we-” He was spun another way. “Doing-” Nick finally released his brother, who swayed slightly on feet, to dance excitedly around on his own. “-this?”

Nick stopped in his tracks, eyes going to Greg who dropped his ears in worry when he rushed up to him. Paws went to grasp his shoulders. “Greg,” he began, with wide eyes. “She said yes….”

His eyes widened at his little brother’s words. “Who?”

“Judy. She said yes to going out tonight.”

The shock of what was said wore off of Greg quickly. He smiled as Nick released him, babbling about how unreal it was that Judy said yes, what he was going to wear, where they should go after the museum, and how perfect the bunny in question was.

“Gotta say, little brother,” he started. “I didn’t know you had it in you.” Nick rolled his eyes. “Oh, fuck you!”

The words were uttered as the front door opened and closed. “Language, please!”

Vivian glared at her sons before heading to her room and shutting the door, leaving a faint smell of rot in her wake.

“I thought you were working a double, Mom.” Greg called as his brother headed to his own room.

“I am! I just got thrown up on, so Wanda let me leave to change! I don’t have any scrubs in my locker.” She opened the door again, smelling a bit cleaner with a can of musk spray in her paw. “So, what’s all the excitement about?”

“Nothing!” came Nick’s frantic voice. The older foxes exchanged looks, Vivian’s confused while Greg looked amused, before turning back to the closed door. Nick could be heard muttering, the sounds of cloth being rustled barely audible. Greg leaned closer to his mom with a grin. “Nick’s got a date.”

No-one, not even Vivian, was prepared for the sound the vixen made. Even in his room, buried in his closet, Nick winced in pain at his mother’s joyous scream.

“MY BABY IS GOING ON HIS FIRST DATE!” she cried. “I NEVER THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD COME!”

She ran to his door gave it an excited knock. “Is it with the bunny? Is it with Judy? OHHHHHH! I’ll bet you two will be SOOOO cute together! Oh, sweetheart! Wear that shirt Skye got you for your birthday! That color really brings out your eyes. You’ll look so handsome in it! Though you look handsome no matter what. You and your brother. Oh! I’m just so happy for you, sweetheart!”

“Uh, Mom,” came Nick’s awkward reply.

“Yes, baby?”

“I’m trying to change here, so could you, you know…?”

“Give the todd some breathing room, Ma,” explained Greg, having gone through this this before. Vivian’s ears and tail bristled with embarrassment.

“Oh!” She looked back the door before looking to her son. “Oh, right! Sorry. I just got excited, I guess.” With a smile she went to grab her purse from her room before heading to the door. Turning back to Greg, she sighed. “Get a picture for me, will you?”

He smiled and nodded, only to be distracted by Nick’s door opening. He ran from his room to his mother, giving her a quick hug before racing back and closing the door behind him. Greg and Vivian shared a smile again before she left.

In his room, Nick dug through his closet until the shirt was found and held up.

His dad had had one just like it, though Matty’s had been a Pawaiian print. Skye joked that he only wore it when he was angry at their mother, though in truth it was his favorite shirt. Vivian always said it was better than a headache as a mood killer and claimed to live for the day when it could be burned.

Nick knew it was folded up and stashed in Vivian’s closet, his mom unable to part with it. Skye had surprised him with a shirt similar in cut with the same material; just no Pawaiian print. But it made him feel like his dad was next to him whenever he wore it. Slipping it on, followed by a pair of khakis, Nick smiled at his reflection.

He looked just like Matthew Wilde.

[kuraiamore]

Gintama fic, Pay your workers fair wage or they’ll start a revolution!!

pairing: Gen

fandom: Gintama

rating: T

summary: Come experience a typical day in the Yorozuya office! Meet the team that makes the magic happen! Find out what it's like to be a member of a fantastic Odd Jobs team!

(In case of emergencies, please head to the Back Arrow button located on the top left-hand corner of your internet browser page.)

(This fanfiction takes no responsibility for any failed expectations on behalf of the reader. Terms and Conditions apply. See your local pro-fanfiction Tumblr post for details.)

notes: Very Very Very belated bday fic for @first-quarter-of-the-moon . This wonderful human being, whose friendship I’m so grateful to have stumbled across in this tiny fandom of shithead samurai, asked for a fic with a pun on the word “glasses”. I’ve no idea if I managed to pull it off, but nevertheless, here it is and I hope you enjoy it even if it is months late<3 <3 <3

ao3 or read below.

It's a quiet day in the Yorozuya office-cum-household-apartment; no jobs, no clients, no day-saving adventure to embark on for one to take pride in one’s life-and-career path as a Can-Do-All, NEET Samurai and Friends Pty Ltd., Odd Jobs™ business. The sort of day where face-planting on the desk for catnaps is considered high productivity and the walk from the couch to the fridge for a well earned snack after doing nothing for an hour is worthy of office-cum-household-apartment bragging rights.

So really, it's like every other day when they're not out disastrously, fantastically doing some combination of saving the world from mad aliens, accidentally joining forces with an assortment of oddball characters who really ought to get some life counselling, travelling through interdimensional planes of existence on ridiculously wacky adventures, or whatever have you, instead of actually, you know, making the required revenue to run a profitable business.

In other words: a standard Yorozuya working day.

At this current point in time, momentarily unaware of the literal office tour taking place for the convenience of this tired narrator, the self-made boss of the Yorozuya is seated at his desk, last week’s copy of Shounen Jump fanned out in a roof over the top of his head. His two young employees-in-training-slash-unofficially-adopted-children are lounging about the main room, one on each of the twin couches framing the apartment-cum-office’s only coffee table. The small, rickety thing has its worn, scratched-marked surface covered with evidence of the day’s work: magazines and dirty tea and coffee mugs. Advertisement catalogues, cooking magazines, idol pop magazines, sports magazines, cars, fashion, home real estate, and everything beyond and in between build up a veritable paper fortress blocking either couch camp from each other.

Odd Jobs™ business, you see; gotta be ready to deal with anything and everything.

As usual on these lazy working days, the trio that make up the Yorozuya spend more time making indulgent commentary on their reading material than actually reading the material itself. Then again, it could only be expected; none of trio have spent any considerable amount of time in school on account of their traumatic backstories which this tired narrator will ask both the beloved characters and readers to conveniently ignore for the sake for easy comedy, and so the expectation that any of them would seriously engage in any real, productive work is entirely preposterous, like seriously, what did you expect, we all know these characters are as dumb as bricks and—

“Hey, some people are trying to read here!” Kagura yells.

“Quiet, Kagura,” Gintoki say, an apathetic tone and expression in his voice and face reminiscent of old men working middle management roles that have no end-of-year bonuses or promotions to look forward to, “the boss is in the middle of important business and needs all his concentration.”

“A proper boss who has important work to do would be doing the work instead of wasting everyone’s time nagging at his employees,” Kagura bites back.

“Well you wouldn't know because you're not a boss, are you?”

“Miss Teen Idol says I am!” Tossing aside the magazine she's currently reading, Kagura tears through the paper fortress like a hurricane uprooting and scattering cities into the skies.

“Oieee!” Shinpachi yells, as his perfectly stacked tower of magazines with Otsuu’s name and face on the front cover, however big or small or scandalously associated, goes toppling over. “Don't worry, Otsuu-chan, I'll save you!”

The broken fortress becomes a battleground, hands and magazines flying as (thankfully empty) cups fall over. It's a battle of speed and precision, Kagura attacking with her rummage-glance-throw-away technique against Shinpachi’s valiant defence in protecting creases and wrinkles from Otsuu-chan’s face.

“Ah-ha!” Kagura crows later, after two minutes of constant barrage. Her arm swings wildly above her head in triumph, the magazine clutched in her hand waving like a banner of victory.

Gintoki yawns without bothering to cover his mouth. There's an empty cup of pudding on the side of his desk that he eyes mournfully. It had been the last one in the fridge, now serving as an ineffective paperweight to last month's overdue gas bill. He’ll have to go buy more soon, lest he suffer from sugar withdrawal. Maybe some of those new jelly-filled chocolate bites he saw at the convenience store too while he's at it.

But then again, a new ice cream parlour had opened two weeks ago, just twenty minutes away by foot from the Yorozuya office.

And he also dimly remembers a commercial from last night's re-run of My Pretty Kitty Takes Over The World, featuring some wildberry confectionery shaped into wearable cat ears.

Gintoki’s still daydreaming sugar-coated dreams when Kagura smacks her magazine onto his desk. The wave of air that comes fanning out from the two-page spread is so violent, it tickles his nose and sends his fringe billowing out around his face.

“Here!” Kagura points to the page she's opened up, revealing a blazing red title asking, ‘Are you Beauty, Brains, or Brawn? Find out your best attribute to win over the Man and Job of Your Dreams!’

Shinpachi joins them at the desk, scanning the heading with a frown. “Why is it ‘Man’ and ‘Job’?” he wonders aloud. “Since when did relationships and careers have anything to do with each other? They’re are totally different things.”

“What are you talking about, Shinpachi? Don’t you know that dealing with men is a full time job?”

“That's right,” Gintoki agrees, nodding along, “men are scum.”

“Yup, yup. They're a parasite on the industry of life. Oi, boss, you should give me a raise for all the effort and overtime I put in dealing with the scum in our workplace.”

“Sorry,” Gintoki says, “the agreement of the contract you signed stipulates that wage raises can only be considered after gaining a minimum of ten years’ experience in your working role.”

“Oh,” Kagura says, complete lack of understanding on her blank face. She shrugs. “Okay then.”

“Wait but we never signed a contract!” Shinpachi says, perplexed.

“What do you call that then?” Gintoki says, throwing his thumb out behind his shoulder.

Shinpachi follows the invisible line to a copy of one of their old advertisement flyers stuck on wall behind the desk. It's instantly recognisable, featuring three handprints and one paw print haphazardly framed around a picture of the Yorozuya team.

A prickly, tingly feeling rushes through his chest—it might be bad business manipulation at its best, but Shinpachi can’t find it in himself to argue against that. He clears his throat.

“In any case,” he says, “the quiz is clearly making the mistake of lumping the two together!”

“Now, now, Shinpachi,” Gintoki interrupts, back in that deliberately overemphasised, sagely, rather quite condescending tone, “it is merely your youth and inexperience with adult matters that make you think that way. You see, the office or workplace romance is the most intense and thrilling romantic experience the ordinary human will have in their measly lifetime. Therefore when a person takes on a job, they’re investing not just in their career and financial stability, but also in the promise of a lifetime partner. That’s what people mean when they talk about being married to work!”

“Gin-san, I don’t think that’s what that means at all, and anyway, you’ve never worked in an office or workplace with other people in your life!”

“You wound me, Patsuan. How do you think I got this far, CEO of my own business with one hundred percent employee loyalty at the prime young age of twenty-eight, if I didn’t have a lifetime of experience dealing with the intricacies of workplace liaisons, huh?”

“Gin-san, you have two underaged employees which I’m sure counts as child labour exploitation, and you never paid the registration fee for the business registration application. I’m pretty sure that the Yorozuya is technically an illegal operation.”

Immediately, Gintoki turns around and closes the window blinds. The room goes quiet as the possibly illegal boss and his two employees glance furtively around them to make sure they hadn't been overheard by any men in black suits who just happened to be creeping around for no reason other than the wacky slice-of-life genre specification.

“Oi, oi,” Gintoki says after a moment, with a shaky laugh, “don't joke about that, Shinpachi-kun. What kind of role model would we be to all our lovely viewers watching and reading us if they thought we were an illegal business? Sunrise would have our heads!”

“It's okay, Gin-chan,” Kagura goes to reassure him, “the only people watching this sketchy anime and reading its sketchy fanfiction are probably sketchy people themselves already.”

“That's right!” Shinpachi adds helpfully, though his neck still cranes around as if looking for hidden microphones and cameras. “Besides, even if we were illegal—which we're not!—then they would still know better than to waste their time coming after us. We're so poor, we wouldn't be able to pay the bail out money anyway! If anything, they should be targeting those multi mega corporations that do way more sketchy stuff! Like tax evasion!”

“And Amanto discrimination!” Kagura adds.

“And killing the environment!”

“And disrupting the view with their giant billboards!”

“And taking advantage of the working class to fuel their corrupt profits!” Shinpachi cries in heated passion, slapping his hand on the table.

“And increasing the price of pudding by ¥240 so Gin-san can only afford to have his sugar intake three times a week instead of four!” Gintoki joins.

“Um, Gin-san, that's not—"

“Down with capitalism!” Kagura cries, jumping back onto her couch and rising one fist into the air while her other hand still clutching the magazine waves it again like a great banner. “Come comrades! Let us take down the abominable bosses and factory managers who exploit the good-hearted working citizens!”

The magazine gets rolled up and becomes a baton which now points accusingly towards the Yorozuya boss. Gintoki looks to his left, and his right, and seeing no one on either side of him, points a finger to his own mug and mouths, “Who, me?”

“Rise up!” Kagura continues with her impassioned call, turning back to her audience of one. Shinpachi hears the call solemnly, eyes burning with the bright rage of workers’ rights. “Rise up and take down the evil corporations and greedy CEOs and business owners who use their money to hoard all the good things to themselves and never leave the sesame-flavoured subonku for the common folk!”

“Well if someone didn't spend all their money on monthly pork barbeque bun sales, they might have enough left over to buy sesame-flavoured subonku whenever the stores have them in stock!”

“But Gin-chan, two pork barbeque buns for the price of one!”

Shinpachi coughs delicately. “You have to admit, Gin-san, it is a very good deal.” Aside to himself, he mumbles, “they’ve saved me more times than I can count,” and hopes Tae never finds his stash of frozen pork barbeque buns he sneaks out at midnight when dark matter dinners prove too much for his stomach to handle.

“What are you two, video game characters who can only revive their health with pork barbeque buns?” Gintoki grouches, then leans back on his fake leather and plastic desk chair. “Ahhh, but really, society is scum. All those flashy, money-grabbing advertisements and media turning the free-thinking man into a mindless drone. Bah!”

“Well,” Shinpachi hedges, fidgeting with the Otsuu-chan NekoNeko double spread special open in front of him, “maybe it's not all so bad…”

“Eh? Don't tell me they've caught you already, Pachi-boy! Those sirens, always luring in the innocent cherry boys with their wily charms and pretty faces! Cover your ears, Shinpachi, before you drown!”

Shinpachi’s face turns bright red as it always does when reminded of his cherry-boy status, like soup that someone put beetroot in and left on the stove for too long so all the vegetables became a mushy red mess like a bloody murder scene like someone dropping a basket of actual ripe, red cherries.

“Like the bright flag of revolution!” Kagura adds to the overly extended and entirely nonsensical metaphor, waving her magazine again even though the front cover is yellow.

For all the embarrassing state of their being, the fantasies of cherry boys cannot be underestimated: in a split second, Shinpachi finds himself in the grip of a fervoured daydream where he's leading the pop idol revolution, Otsuu’s grateful, adoring eyes centred upon him from her Queen Idol throne made from glittery microphones and album awards, while he stands bearing her image and flag upon the conquered mountain of her rivals’ platinum albums and singles. Shaking himself free of this intoxicating dream takes truly the will of only the most stout-hearted and tenacious of samurai, but Shinpachi has always been deceptively strong, underestimated as he is by his otaku appearance.

“No, that's not what I meant!” he says vehemently, crossing his arms over his chest. “It has nothing to do with cherry boys, or rather, not only to do with cherry boys! Yes, the capitalist market may be a money-grabbing, exploitative, manipulative, marginalising machine"—he takes a deep breath here, having run out of air after his string of long, multisyllabic words—“but you can't deny that it's also given some people the chance to achieve their dreams, and in that way, helped inspire others too!” He gazes lovingly at his Otsuu spread, conveniently ignoring the headline to the side exclaiming, ‘Otsuu production company bankrupt?! Employee scandal!!’

“Ahhh,” Gintoki says in a bored, dry voice, “that was sure quick of you to swap sides there, Shinpachi. You went from glass half-empty to glass half-full in, what, less time than it takes for a teenage boy to hide his dirty magazines when his mum unexpectedly bursts through his bedroom door. What, you playing double glasses or something? Doubles G’s? Is that what you're into, Shinpachi?” Gintoki tuts, shaking his head. “Teenage boys are so greedy, always thinking more is better. No wonder they make such good prey for those dirty media companies. It's okay, Shinpachi, you'll learn, you'll learn.”

Shinpachi splutters, the thought of double G’s such a force against the foundations of his feeble cherry boy mind that he cannot pull out his defences. Taking advantage of the moment, Kagura jumps in with a question.

“What are you talking about, Gin-chan?” she says. “Shinpachi has always had two glasses. Like a pair of glasses! G. G.!”

She crooks her thumbs to her forefingers, touching the tips together so they make a pair of circles just the right size to peer out of, and presses them to her eyes. Somewhere in the distance, a group of broke university students break out into a flashmob, a chorus of ‘G’s and ‘baby’s rising up while a crowd of people just trying to reach the end of the street look on in confusion.

“Bless you,” Gintoki says, while Kagura continues to blink owlishly out of her literally hand-made glasses.

“My glasses look nothing like that,” Shinpachi complains to Kagura, because that is far safer than remaining in the grips of a Double-G dream. (Already he has had to discreetly wipe away the trickle of blood from his nose while Kagura and Gintoki were busy fooling around.)

“Of course not,” Gintoki reassures, “your glasses look like those cheap, mass-produced products that break and fail you right when you need them.”

“Well maybe if you actually paid us a living wage, I could afford brand glasses if mine offend your sensibilities so much!”

“For someone who’s only just over legal working age, you sure have high expectations!”

“You're not even paying me minimum wage, I could report you, you know!”

“Oh yeah? Report me to who? The boss?” Gintoki snorts, waving a dismissive hand.

Shinpachi’s nostrils flare, eyebrows drawing together in an angry line.

“I'll report you to… to… to the industry union!”

Gintoki laughs an evil, corporate laugh. “What industry union? The Odd Jobs union? Ha! Good luck with that! Even if one existed, it would never get anything done because its members would be too busy looking for odd jobs to make their daily living!”

Kagura’s eyes flash. “Pachi-boy, let's start a union!” she says, though what a fourteen year old alien would know about industry unions, the never-ending battle for workers’ rights, petitions, rallies, strikes and other various union organisation stuffs remains an unanswered question. Still, one couldn't fault her enthusiasm.

Unexpectedly, in utter abandonment of his straight man role, Shinpachi jumps onto the idea.

“Yes!” he says. “We can invite all the other Odd Jobs teams from the anime crossovers we have! ‘Odd Jobs’ is such a well known and overused trope, I'm sure there will be plenty who will want to join us!”

“The Odd Jobs industry revolution!” Kagura bellows, arms spread out wide like she’s presenting a magic trick. “Led by the Yorozuya!”

“O-Oi!” Suddenly faced with a revolution and overzealous employees, Gintoki has no idea what to do.

Luckily for him, right at that moment, the phone rings. Its noisy call goes on for two ring cycles, cutting through and silencing all conversation in the room, before Gintoki wipes out a hand to pick up the receiver. Suddenly Kagura and Shinpachi are pressed right up against his side, intense looks on their faces as they eavesdrop on the call, union revolution promptly forgotten at the prospect of a new job.

“Hello, you've reached Yorozuya Gin-chan, how may I help you? Yes, a job? Right now? You're desperate? Of course, of course, that's what the Yorozuya are here for! What exactly…? Yes. Uh-huh. Uh-huh, of course, yes.” As he listens to the job details, Gintoki catches the gaze of his employees and does a fist pump in the air. Kagura and Shinpachi grin at him and return the gesture. “...Yes, just leave it to us! We'll be down there before you can blink!”

With that, he hangs up the phone, pushes back his chair and stands, grabbing his bokutou and slipping it into his belt with a smooth motion.

“Alright, people!” he says, turning around to look down at Kagura and Shinpachi. “We've been called and now we got a job to do. Tell me: Are the Yorozuya ready to put their all, to go beyond, plus ultra—"

Shinpachi sighs; of course they couldn't get away without referencing another anime. He hopes at least with fanfiction’s grey legality, they won't be sued or have to cop another lecture about copyright laws from Sunrise.

“—to deliver the best Odd Jobs service to our dear and valuable clientele?”

“Yes!” comes the enthusiastic response, Kagura and Shinpachi standing with straight backs bearing their pride and excitement as a true Yorozuya member.

Gintoki cups his hand over his ear, leaning forward. “I said, are you ready?!”

“Yes!”

A short, approving nod. “Alright. Yorozuya Gin-chan, move out!”

[deancasbigbang]

Title: Dream House Author: breathingdestiel Artist: Dreym Rating: Explicit Pairings: Dean/Cas Warnings/Tags: modern AU, fake dating, mutual pining, friends to lovers, misunderstandings, demisexual!Cas, bottom!Dean, top!Cas. Posting Date: 11/16/2017

Summary:  Castiel Shurley and his best friend Dorothy Baum have decided to move in together. After his aunt assumes they are dating, she offers them money for the house, but only if they apply for a famous reality show ‘Dream House’. Since they could use the money and he doesn’t want to come out to his aunt, Castiel and Dorothy agree to fake date for the show. But things go wrong when Dorothy falls in love with the show’s producer and Castiel starts to develop feelings for one of the hosts.

Dean Winchester is a co-host of ‘Dream House’, along with his brother. Sam, being a realtor, finds a fixer-upper and Dean turns it into a perfect house for their clients. Even though he has what most people only dream about, Dean is incredibly lonely. He had bad experiences with relationships in the past and he doesn’t think he will ever meet anyone who can earn his trust. Until he meets Castiel.

- - -

“Oh, yeah, I’m very glad. Dorothy doesn’t have many friends, what with all the traveling,” Castiel said as he gazed adoringly at Dorothy.

Ignoring a sudden pang of jealousy, Dean asked, “What about you?”

“I have a few close friends, but I’m not an extrovert like her, so I’m okay with it.” “Well, that’s good,” Dean said awkwardly, desperate to keep the conversation going, but unsure how.

Fortunately, Castiel saved him. “I presume you have many friends.” “I do know a lot of people,” he chuckled, “but most of them I wouldn’t consider friends. There’s like five or six people that I’m really close to. I guess there are Bobby and his team, too. They are great guys; you’ll meet them next week when we start shooting at the house.”

“I’m looking forward to it,” Castiel smiled. “So, they’re Bobby’s team? Not yours?”

“Bobby is their boss, but I have to pretend I’m the one in charge.”

“But you do work on the houses too? That’s not only for the show?” Castiel asked, but didn’t sound condescending as many others did when Dean’s job was in question.

“I do, but only for a week or so on each house, to get different shots,” Dean rubbed his neck, “My job is mostly to look pretty, though.”

“Well, you do that quite well,” Castiel said before widening his eyes and blushing. “I’m sorry that was inappropriate.”

“It’s okay, Cas,” Dean grinned, feeling his own cheeks heating up, “I like it when people appreciate my job.”

With his face still red, Cas continued as if nothing had happened, “You must be downplaying your abilities. I don’t watch the show often, but from what I’ve seen you’re very handy and you seem to know what you’re doing. Or maybe you’re just an amazing actor. Either way, you have skills you should be proud of.”

Dean looked down at his clasped hands. Cas was smiling softly at him and Dean’s cheeks burned more intensely. “I definitely do know my way around tools. In fact, I’ve built my own house.” Any other time, Dean would feel like he was showing off, but he didn’t think Cas would see it that way.

“That’s great, Dean. I can’t wait, then, to start helping you out.” He leaned in conspiratorially and whispered, “I don’t want to brag, but I’ve built my fair share of birdhouses over the years.”

Dean guffawed and patted Cas’s shoulder. “I’d better watch out then- you’ll end up stealing my job.” More softly, he added, “Thanks, Cas. Oh, it’s okay to call you Cas, right?”

Cas waved him off, “Of course. Only my aunt calls me Castiel.”

[we-future-first]

Will artificial intelligence be able to replace novelists?

Before I begin

Yes, I have watched Humans Need Not Apply.

Yes. I have watched multiple videos and have read multiple articles on A.I. innovation in regards to writing fiction and I’ve used a few short story generators. They’re terrifying to say the least.

If all you do is theorize about A.I., I don’t want your input. I want someone who has actually studied A.I. and machine learning to answer this for me. I don’t mean to sound harsh, but I just want something that’s closest to the truth on how A.I. works and how it’ll master the craft of prose.

Please refrain from being condescending when you answer my question. This post is already depressing and anxiety-inducing enough and I kindly ask you to be considerate of how you answer me. Of course, I want the truth but there’s a difference between “Yes, AI will be able to surpass human ability to write novels” vs “Yes, AI will create better stories than you. Don’t deny it by thinking you’re some special creative snowflake.” As someone who has poured their heart into the craft of novel writing for over five years, this is a very hard pill for me to swallow.

Lastly, I humbly ask for you to watch all the linked videos and read my embedded links thoroughly for you to understand my question completely.

The Immense Progress of AI Music Has Me Worried

Quite a few years ago, I heard the first ever AI generated piece of music. It was laughably bad and everyone in the comments agreed. However, the other day after stumbling upon this Oh, I did see on a video that this piece was arranged by a human.

But still, given that the time between the first AI piece of music and this piece of music is just a few short years shows that technology is accelerating at a speed that it never has before.

Stories are structure and a Mix of Ideas

This is a no-brainer. AI can surely learn this. Story structure is well… structure. And AI is excellent at that.

Each chapter is meant to push the story forward in a meaningful way. Every scene is meant to do this, too.

Oh, and the reason why I’m using her videos is because she’s an editor and knows her stuff.

But…

Will Artificial Intelligence Ever Understand “Why”?

Why = The deeper understanding of what this event / character arc / scene / and even sentence means for the greater context of the story. Oftentimes, the greater context of the story is the central philosophical / moral question.

This example of applying plot structure to themes and character arcs is a good example of the “why” I’m referring to. She is able to seamlessly take a (funnily enough) AI generated plot yet give it meaning by understanding how all the components interact with one another. Please share your thoughts on this.

I might even go as far as to say that editors like her - Ellen Brock - will be difficult to replace because she is able to comprehend the words being written / said and help her client understand how to achieve their writing goals through their specific vision / goals for the story they want to write. What do you think of this? Will novel-writing AI be able to connect abstract concepts together?

The concept of comprehension is what leads me to my next point.

The Structure of Music vs Word Salad

Music and novels have one glaring similarity that terrifies me - they are both highly structured. But one difference I can see between them is that music is a series of pleasing notes while books are a series of pleasing words… and every novel ever written is different.

The main reasons being:

1) The specific voice of the author, how they perceive the world around them, and how they filter that perspective through into their stories.

2) Even among different books authors will shift their “voice” in order to fit the inner voice of the different character. For instance, a child narrator won’t think the same as an adult narrator.

3) Every character is different and it might prove to be a challenge to keep them internally consistent if all their dialogue is scanned from other books and mashed together. Additionally, characters can sometimes exhibit different qualities - showing new “sides” of themselves - which will further add to their distinction.

4) Every author describes settings, sensory detail, and the inner thoughts of their characters differently.

From what I know about AI, it uses deep-learning algorithms as well as scans every book in existence

But when it scans every book ever won’t it be bogged down by all the variation of the authors?

This variation and highly subjective interpretation of prose leads me to my next point.

Theory One: The Word Salad Rough Draft

This is just a theory based on my miniscule knowledge of AI. I know nothing about AI which is why I’m here in the first place.

One thing I noticed while listening to this was how the AI managed to understand Rowling’s specific phrasing and how words correlated with each other. Of course, what was missing was the lack of understanding of the words and the scene’s significance in the overall story - hence why it was hilarious and jumbled.

Example: Chapters.

How I think the AI will work

In the future, if a novelist has, say, a chapter outline for their book and plugs it into an AI, it might do something like this to comprehend it.

Idea for a Middle-Grade novel: Norra is walking in the park when she steps on a snake. The snake bites her, causing terrible pain, and the chapter ends with her being rushed to the hospital.

The AI, since it has been instructed to write the first chapter of a middle grade novel, will scan every middle-grade novel in existence and take average chapter length and vocabulary into account.

Then, the AI will scan the words: “Norra”, “Walking”, “Park”, “Snake”, “Pain”, and “Hospital.” Then, it will take all these words and find them in other Middle-Grade books and find how the words correlate with each other.

This is what I came up with as a possible chapter example.

“Nora was happily skipping around in the mud in the park when she saw an eagle soaring through the sky. Then, she goes off and climbs a tree with her bare feet. She digs and tries as hard as she can to find the beautiful treasure hidden under the sand yet the slippery substance keeps washing through her fingers. She finds a snake in the sand and screams. The snake lunges at her, fangs bared and hissing like a wild cat. The trees around Nora were heavy with fruit and the bushes were bursting with vibrant wildflowers. The snake bites her face and she screams like a banshee. She is rushed off to the hospital where a mean doctor puts an oxygen mask over her face and tells her that she’ll arrive safely and that her asthma attack will soon be over.”

As you can see, I did use all the words but I intentionally changed the style from simplistic writing to more higher-level Middle-Grade at random. Sure, the sentences themselves made sense but together they were just… weird.

How will AI be able to write better prose than humans since a combination of all the books in the desired genre have so much stylistic difference between them?

Now, we could request the AI to narrow it down like this:

Write a book about: A young boy going into a magical world, climbing a high mountain, and riding an elephant before returning home as a braver and kinder version of himself.

Write in the style of: Jane Yolen and J.K. Rowling.

Due to these two styles of writing being pretty different, I don’t see anything all that great coming from the product. Furthermore, if the author has only written a limited number of books, the AI can’t scan something that has never been written.

Example Two: Characters

How I think the AI will work

I could see this being even more difficult to tackle the nuance of body language, dialogue, interaction between a different web of characters, and, having the character’s progression and speech feel natural and make sense within the context of the story. What do you think of this?

The AI will request a basic overview of my character. For example: “The side character’s name is Ned. Ned is overconfident and will learn to control his impulsive nature by the end of the story.”

It will probably request the genre I want (YA fiction) and go through every single overly confident character in existence. Then, it will generate dialogue.

“Hey! I got this!”

“You’re not the boss of me!”

“What a loser. Don’t listen to him. I’ve gotcha covered.”

“I can’t believe you’re such a chicken!”

These sound like typical phrases from an overly confident kid. But since these randomly generated phrases are not what my character would say this would make the AI rough draft even less helpful. It’s not worth the mental effort of sifting through out-of-context dialogue in order to find out how Ned would interact with my separate set of characters. Not only this, it might run the risk of making Ned a cliche since the AI is probably programmed to scan the most commonly said phrases.

What this would mean for human novelists.

My thinking is that AI could help real authors write rough drafts for their novels. But since AI-produced rough drafts would be full of inconsistent word salad, it would actually be more productive for humans to simply write their own rough drafts and write… well, normally. The author understands what they’re trying to achieve while the AI does not.

What do you think about my first theory?

Theory Two: Self Awareness Beyond our Comprehension

Now that I’ve addressed several potential pitfalls that are preventing AI to write novels, I think the biggest thing that’s stopping AI from doing this is comprehension of the written word, a deeper understanding of it, and self-awareness. What do you think about this?

One thing to consider is the fact that AI intelligence will go beyond our human understanding. This might have us conclude that AI will simply become genius authors pumping out year New York Times best sellers every two seconds, but if you really think about, AI is not limited to the human form as all past geniuses have been.

They will not grow old, sick, tired, or spiral into insanity. They are not limited to the human form. Why do we connect with the works of literature now? Because they were people like us - and limited like us. Their brains were far beyond ours and their human limitation grounded their potential and grounded their experiences.

Imagine handing a novel to a young child. It is beyond their comprehension. Even the brightest of children (3-5 years old) could never read YA fiction. Why? There is a massive gulf of mental development between teenagers and children. Now, apply this concept of “gulf of intelligence” to AI and humans.

AI is, theoretically, not limited by anything. It can write in all the languages that humanity has created. It can write entire novels in code and create new words that we’ve never seen before. You know how English is derived from other languages? Well, since AI is not limited to human form / mental capacity / time then surely would it be able to create whole new languages?

Not only this, but since it’s self-aware and AI is writing stories for itself, it could possibly get “bored” of stories that humans like and vary up the structure. Say, having ten character arcs, twelve acts in each story, and having one chapter last hundreds of pages.

Basically, if AI became self-aware (which might be the requirement for it to understand the nuance of prose) it would create stories beyond human comprehension and enjoyment.

What this would mean for human novelists

For a few years, human writers would be terrified of being replaced. However, when the AI’s intelligence surpasses human reader’s enjoyment it will create a way for human writers once again.

Theory Three: The AI Becomes A Perfect Mimic

How I think this AI would work

It will scan every single novel perfectly - understand everything there is to know about stories - and just… write amazing novels that are stylistic and have complex characters.

This is the scariest theory of them all. Basically, since the AI won’t need to be self-aware, it will only do what it was programmed to do - write excellent novels.

But even then, there is still hope. Let’s say AI produces millions of novels within a few years. (Gotta remember, AI is not limited by alcoholism that way human authors are.) This will flood the scannable novel market that will only have slight variations of human works. Considering that even the most prolific human authors can produce 1-2 books a year max, this will lead to readers catching on to how similar every AI novel is. It could be possible that AI could produce more novels in a few years than the history of human authors combined.

So, that being said, there’s the possibility AI books could write themselves in a corner. What do you think about this?

What this would mean for human novelists

This would mean that novelists will simply have to do with only writing stories for themselves - and not be able to share their art with the world because the market is flooded with AI books. This would also result in novelists having to constantly prove to others that they are the real author which could be rather difficult to do. OR if AI does write itself into a corner - it would open the market again for human novels.

Closing Questions

What do you think of my theories?

Did one theory in particular stand out to you? If so, why?

Do you think AI can write novels that will compete against real authors?

If so, when? I’m hoping something like this happens no sooner than 4-5 decades from now.

After reading my theories, do you think AI novelists would require self-awareness in order to understand the deeper meaning of their prose?

If so, why or why not?

Do you consider novel-writing a “harder egg to crack” than music composition? Why or why not?

Food For Thought

I know my theories have been focused on how the AI will impact the novel-writing sphere but there is another thing I want you to consider. As novelists, we derive meaning from writing our books. Everyday we confront the blank page and, through many hours of hard work and dedication, we can bring our vision of our stories to life. We have something to say - something to express to the world. An AI has nothing to express.

If AI just makes novel writing super easy, it takes away the value it has to the human author. The struggle, the joys, the journey, the stories’ gradual evolution from an inkling of ideas to a fully fleshed-out manuscript for others to love and enjoy - is what gives our lives a sense of purpose and place in the world. If you’re a programmer considering producing novel-writing software, I beg for you to reconsider your choice.

submitted by /u/TempestheDragon [link] [comments] source https://www.reddit.com/r/Futurology/comments/gwsafj/will_artificial_intelligence_be_able_to_replace/