#and mostly just dump whatever bullshit she's been through on me unprompted

[erstwhile-elster]

i do not know how to explain to my mother that No I don't look at the future optimistically and there are number of reasons why

[himboarcher]

reasons i've seen folks say that grad critics hate grad:

they hate travis (in fairness, i’ve def seen some comments of people shitting on trav for the sake of shitting on trav, but it’s not super common and typically gets downvoted into oblivion on reddit.)

it's not balance / travis isn't griffin (???????)

they hate neurodivergent people (again, in fairness, i have seen a handful of comments that could come across this way! but most of the time when travis being ADHD or his NPD is brought up, it's by defenders saying that criticizing travis is ableist because he's neurodivergent or, in one particular comment, infantilizing him bc of it and literally comparing grad to putting a kid's artwork on the fridge. there were some comments early on that pointed to him being a narcissist as the reason for things people disliked about grad, but everyone seems to have realized that that's a shitty train of thought and left it behind.)

they're just toxic haters (again, there are a small handful of people like this because this is the internet, but the genuine criticism greatly outweighs their bullshit. i 100% think that the people, which is mostly just one dude who is also insufferable on reddit, who have been responding rudely to positive tweets under the episode announcements lately are out of line and need to stop. there's been an influx of that lately, presumably because people are frustrated that after over a year of grad going on, there's been no improvement to most of the major issues. that's still no excuse to be a dick to folks, though.)

vs some of the actual reasons i don't like grad:

the racism / racist tropes, and the way that they’ve straight up ignored this criticism and will likely never acknowledge it. pretty wild considering a core tenet of their brand is their willingness to acknowledge when they’ve messed up and do their best to course correct.

clumsy attempts at inclusion that are shallow and often end up being fairly offensive ("...ask me about my wheelchair," anyone?)

on a related note: i don't think that travis had bad intentions, but as an nonbinary person, it feels othering to me that travis only has enby characters give others their pronouns unprompted. i'm thinking specifically of kai here. having listened to their introduction, i don't think it's as bad or awkward as some people have said, but i can't remember travis ever having another NPC tell the PCs their pronouns, especially not a cis character. it's not a huge deal, but it's something that rubbed me the wrong way. admittedly, i don't think it would bother me so much if travis hadn't dropped the ball so much with performative inclusion in the past.

okay i'm putting the rest under a read more because even without getting into all of the problems i have with it, this got Long.

little to no player agency. player choices are ultimately meaningless and have little to no effect on the world. even when he seems to go along with a plan they come up with, it always ends with them having to go back to travis' pre-written script (see: subpoenaing the xorn, but not really because they had to go with travis' original plan of "send the xorn home through the rift".) the players repeatedly get told things about what they think or feel or what they've been doing to an unnecessary degree. fitzroy is the only one who really gets space to play and decide things for himself, and that's only because travis has decided he's the main character.

the NPCs are all too nice and willing to give the PCs anything they ask for and more, unless the PCs are trying to follow their own plan and then the NPCs are completely useless. but honestly, aside from gray, all of the NPCs are just.... nice. travis refuses to even let his antagonists be mean or cruel or even more than just slightly rude, because that'd be a bummer and we don't want that! the "twist" of gordy the lich king actually being polite and chill is not a twist at all because everyone is like that in this world. the NPCs are also wildly overpowered, but then suddenly absolutely useless when the PCs actually want their help.

too many cliffhangers that are dropped immediately at the beginning of the next episode. i feel bad for travis because so many of these cliffhangers actually set up good momentum and seemed like things were gonna get interesting, but almost every single time he just dropped them at the beginning of the next episode. like when althea showed up to interview the boys and the next episode started with travis being like "actually you went to sleep, she said she'll be back tomorrow!"

that time travis specifically said in his exposition dump that the thundermen left their horses behind because they thought the centaurs might be offended by them riding horses, only to later on rag on them for being surprised that the centaurs had horses they could ride.....

also the centaur arc in general, but i already listed racism above, so.

the way that the toxic positivity and parasocial tendencies in the mcelroy fandoms have made a large portion of the fandom take ANY criticism as a personal attack on travis and/or on themselves for enjoying something others consider bad, either morally or just quality-wise. it’s okay to admit that something you like has problematic elements or just isn’t as good as it once was. you can and should engage critically with the media you consume.

related to above: the way travis has handled genuine criticism, which is to throw public tantrums on his twitter or make weird passive aggressive tweets & ultimately ignore all the genuine criticism and advice he's been offered by claiming it's all subjective, even after he specifically asked for it and set up an email for folks to send in genuine, objective advice for him (after he threw a tantrum on twitter and replied to someone's criticism publicly, which resulted in his followers dogpiling on that person bc how dare they insult their internet best friend). while i was writing this last night, he actually announced that he’s taking a break from Twitter and acknowledged that he’s been using it as an echo chamber where he can easily get validation from folks, and honestly i’m happy for him that he’s recognized this problem and is stepping away for a while! i hope he’ll genuinely use this time to reflect on how he’s been behaving and find a more healthy way to use social media. i’m leaving this point in because i think his Twitter being such a positive echo chamber was encouraging him to do stuff like this, and him somewhat acknowledging his behavior doesn’t mean it can no longer be discussed.

rainer. extremely cool concept in theory and i was very into it until that awkward "does anyone want to ask about my wheelchair?" moment. also when travis had her use her mobility aid to RAM INTO A DOOR instead of just fucking knocking???? also all the times travis has tried to force a romantic relationship between her and fitzroy, despite fitzroy displaying no interest in her in that way. also, just to clarify: as an ace person, i don’t think this is aphobic! (and it’s kind of a stretch to call it that imo, especially since griffin never explicitly said that fitzroy's aromantic!) i just think it’s weird and awkward and a little uncomfortable for me personally, mostly because it reminds me of the times i’ve been in similar situations.

less of a problem than a lot of the other stuff and more just bad writing, but the forced emotional moments. in general, nothing in grad feels earned (why are the boys heading a war? when they have multiple actual heroes with combat experience on their side and a supposedly powerful secret organization? and the thundermen are like 21 years old max and have only had like ~10 fights in the entire campaign?) but there've been a couple times where travis has tried to force unearned emotional moments, presumably because he knows people enjoyed those with the last campaigns. but the difference is that in balance, the big emotional moments happened because they were earned. in grad, it's just travis throwing a baby pegasus at us for a few minutes and then the next time she shows up, it's supposed to be a tearful goodbye.

there are absolutely no stakes. remember when the thundermen got told that if they left, gray would kill 10 students? and then they left and came back and it turns out that what gray actually meant was, "i'll tie ten students who are mostly nameless NPCs to a tree and throw some dogs at them that you can easily stop in time, then throw a tantrum because how dare you but i'll leave before you can really do anything to hurt me lol" travis did have fitzroy's magic get taken away, but like. it didn't really do anything? also all he had to get it back was be coerced into using drugs by an authority figure and trip in the woods?

we're told that the school is weird and the hero system is corrupt, but the world of nua is still presented as more of a liberal utopia than anything? althea getting fired because of a corrupt villain is the only time we've somewhat seen corruption, but even then, she was still allowed to get (what seems to me, anyway, but admittedly i don't know for sure bc nothing about the HOG makes much sense) a fairly important job from the very people who stripped her of her hero license or whatever the fuck heroes need?

travis doesn't actually seem to understand how capitalism or bureaucracy works and just chalks up everything to "red tape." also more on the rest of the boys than him specifically, but the "let's destroy capitalism!" thing turning into just pushing some filing cabinets over................... okay.

and one last piece of extremely subjective criticism: it's just kind of.... boring. i think a lot of people, myself included, would be willing to overlook 90% of the problems with graduation if it didn't feel like such a slog to get through.

also people saying that we can't or shouldn't criticize graduation because it's "free" is absolutely absurd for several reasons. first, something being free does not make it above criticism. second, there ARE people who directly financially support the show with monthly donations. three, there's a difference between something being free and something being not for profit. podcasting is their full time job. they make their living off of money made from TAZ and MBMBAM (and probably their other shows to a lesser extent). this not a fun home game that they are graciously recording and sharing with us. it is a product they are producing that they make money off of, both from ads in the episodes and merch & books based off of these podcasts. they have marketed themselves as professionals, and both griffin and travis have been on panels where they are marketed as professional DMs and appear alongside other professional DMs (which makes it incredibly frustrating when people say that travis is just a newbie DM and we can't criticize him because of that. if he's a newbie, then he should not be taking part of panels as a professional DM where he speaks as an expert). TAZ is free in the same way that an episode of NCIS is free. i may not pay for it directly, but the creators are paid to create it and profit off of me consuming this product. so saying we should be grateful for any mcelnoise that the benevolent good boys share with us and that we're not allowed to criticize it "because it's free" is absolutely wild.

[characteroulette]

Also, as an added bonus, I wrote an actual scene for the "We Didn’t Need You" AU that I had fun with (because Jonathan), so here’s that, too

  Dante knew even in childhood that he was meant to be alone. Whenever he tried to get his classmates to play with him, they were never interested in giants made of melting clay or trickster pixies who trapped the unsuspecting travellers in eternal dances. They wanted to play things like 'house', or re-enact bible stories, or play made up silly hero stories in which the monsters were always defeated and the heroes came out on top.

  They didn't seem to understand that the monsters could have complexity to them, that they weren't just evil beings. And Dante never understood the appeal of pretending to be a family. (They could have their robot cats and pet dragons, but the fact that the Mama and Papa were so kind and loving with their babies just seemed like such a lie.)

  He had a Mama and a Papa. He had a sibling sometimes. But, at the end of the day, Dante was always alone.

  At some point, he just started preferring it that way.

//

  Of all the new first years that came to their school that year, it was the frightened blond boy who caught Jonathan's interest. The kid got a single room, always ate alone at his own table, and seemed to be avoiding everyone else. An air of loneliness hung about the boy, yet it was a contented sort of loneliness. At least, if Jonathan was reading it right.

  Honestly, despite never even interacting with this other boy, Jonathan felt a kinship with him.

  Maybe that's what possessed him to sit down at the same table one day for lunch, completely unprompted.

  The disturbance made the boy look up at Jonathan. A mixture of confusion and fear was in his eyes, which Jonathan now noted were red. Just as Niculaie and Damon's eyes were. After the initial surprise (and attempting to figure out what exactly he was supposed to do now that he'd made this impulsive decision), Jonathan held up a hand in greeting. "Hey."

  The other boy nodded slowly in return. "Um. Hi."

  His voice was quiet, unsure. Which was fair. Jonathan had invaded the other kid's space. Jonathan offered up a smile, shoving his hands into his lab coats' pockets. "I'm Jonathan. Nice to meet ya. Mind if I sit here for today?"

  "Uh." The other boy bowed his head, staring resolutely at his tray of food. "I guess. I can't stop you. If you really want to." The more he spoke, the quieter he petered out by the end. And, perhaps because Jonathan was very aware of his own accent, he could hear the slightest bit of accent in the other boy's voice. "I'm, uh. Dante Vicario."

  "Vicario." Jonathan sounded the name out shortly. It sounded familiar, but he couldn't quite place it. Perhaps he'd run it by Damon, that pompous rich boy knew the whole school. For better or worse. Jonathan half-smiled and turned back towards Vicario. "What electives you taking? Let me guess -- one of 'em's Study Hall, right?"

  Vicario kept his head down, his expression mostly out of view. Jonathan waited a moment for Vicario to reply, realised he wasn't going to get one, then went about eating his own lunch. He'd sat there, it was up to him to make conversation. But it was also polite to give space when appropriate. And it didn't seem like Vicario was very keen on the whole talking thing.

  Maybe Jonathan could try again during dinner. Or maybe even after hours. Vicario had that single room and all.

  But no, no. That wasn't Jonathan, that wasn't how a nice, straight boy would make friends. And Jonathan was a normal, straight boy.

  "Sitting here today, huh?"

  Frank suddenly dropped his tray on the place beside Jonathan's, grinning mischievously as Vicario jumped at the sudden noise. Jonathan frowned in amusement at Frank. "Thought I'd get to know Vicario a bit. How about you?"

  "Oh, you know." Frank sat down, cheery as usual. Despite Jonathan knowing exactly what Frank meant. Still, graceful as ever, Frank moved on by looking next at Vicario. "So. Would you rather fight a bear or a bunch of bees?"

  Jonathan snorted, barely holding back his laughter. Another perfect opener from the genius kid himself. God, Jonathan was so glad Frank was able to be his roommate. Even if it meant he was reminded of William more than he'd like. Well, whatever. That ship had sailed. Now Jonathan just had to keep his head about him, to last until the end of the year. Then he'd be off to college and, hopefully, things would make more sense by that point.

  Vicario dared to glance up at Frank, that mix of fear and confusion still in his eyes. They stared at each other a moment. At first, Jonathan wasn't sure which of them would speak first, if at all. Then Frank grinned brightly. "All right, easier question. What would your most essential item be if the world ended right now?"

  Vicario perked up for just a second, an answer ready in his mind. But he paused, stopping himself. An awkward minute passed, in which Frank's smile fell and Vicario looked to be fighting with himself on something. Then, in a surprisingly swift motion, Vicario stood, grabbing his tray, and hurried off. Both Jonathan and Frank watched Vicario dump the whole tray in the trash, then leave the cafeteria completely. Jonathan wasn't sure Vicario had even touched any of it.

  "Huh." Frank sunk back in his seat, looking as perplexed as Jonathan felt. "I didn't expect he'd run."

  Jonathan hummed vaguely in reply. It may have been an impulsive decision, but this was turning out to be more intriguing than he'd expected.

  Frank shrugged, then grinned up at Jonathan. "You gonna answer my question at least?"

  Jonathan smirked, placing his hand heavily on top of Frank's head. Just enough to push Frank forward in his seat a little. "Hah, but you all ready know my answer."

  "It could've changed, unlike your attitude."

  Frank half-whined, half-laughed. The kid was such a good sport. As such, Jonathan relented, removing his hand and allowing Frank to sit upright again. "It's still my chem. set." As he answered, Jonathan leaned back in his seat enough to cross one leg over the other, staring off towards the exit to the cafeteria. "The chemicals come in handy. Never know when you'd need explosives or some medical supplies."

  "Logical as ever, sir chemist." Frank attempted a posh, serious tone, but ended up giggling. Jonathan smiled along. Frank petered out, then gave a long, dramatic sigh. "I gotta go now, I only came over to talk for a bit."

  Jonathan raised his eyebrows, intrigued. "Got plans?"

  "Yeah, that Philips girl agreed to help me with some of my English stuff." Frank grinned as he stood and grabbed his tray, giddy as ever. After a moment, however, that giddiness turned into sheepishness. "I mean. Not that I don't think you'd be able to help me with that, too, just."

  Jonathan shook his head in what he hoped was an encouraging, understanding sentiment. "Go make friends."

  A bright child like Frank couldn't be bound to just his focused brother and someone as dour as Jonathan, lord knew. Frank seemed reassured, thankfully, perking right back up and grinning with confidence. "Thanks. See ya later, Jonathan."

  They waved to one another in parting as Frank dashed off to sit with miss Paige Philips and her gang. Jonathan contented himself a minute with watching them all interact with one another, talking and laughing animatedly. They had the Wolf, his band mates, and van Helsing IV with them. Frank and the Fourth must've been new additions, as Jonathan didn't remember them being there last month. Or even last year for the Fourth. Damon was probably keeping closer tabs on them, being so hung up on that Philips girl.

  Honestly, though. She wasn't that special, really. Her blonde hair might've been the only real stand out thing, as she insisted it was natural, but in every other respect she was normal. She had a lot of fight, she didn't take any bullshit, and besides that. Couldn't Damon tell she wasn't interested? Niculaie at the very least had to have mentioned it to Damon. Even Natasha or Aglaé had to have said something by this point. It'd been a whole year!

  Speaking of, Niculaie, Damon, Natasha, and Aglaé (with Diane, Charon, and Gaëlle) all grouped over, sitting around Jonathan's table with their trays of lunch. Natasha gave a cheery greeting while Charon immediately engaged Diane and Gaëlle in a discussion that seemed like a continuation of an earlier topic. Aglaé, of course, had his nose buried in a book. Niculaie, oddly, smiled very gently at Jonathan. "You tend to smile so much more whenever you're speaking with Ernest."

  Damon near cackled. "Kid should realise what a rare treat that is."

  Jonathan levelled them both with his best uninterested expression, hoping to god his embarrassment wouldn't show through. "Whatever, Kingpin."

  Damon really laughed at that while Niculaie frowned. How the two of them ever became friends and stayed that way, Jonathan would never understand. Even though, on the inside, he knew exactly how easily Damon could work his charms on someone. That show-off had been born lucky, a trait Jonathan certainly didn't share. But the jerk did make use of it to help out Niculaie when it mattered, so maybe Jonathan could ease up. Just a little.

  An earlier thought came back to him and he decided in favour of pursuing it. "Hey, Asheford, humour me a moment. Why's the name 'Vicario' ring a bell?"

  For a brief second, Damon's eyes went wide. Like he'd been caught off-guard. Even Niculaie's expression turned to shock in that moment and he turned to Damon in concern. Before Niculaie had a chance to say something, however, Damon recovered and smoothed himself out with a smirk. "Had a run-in with the Fireball, eh?"

  "Is, um." Niculaie paused, a little too excited, and continued with much more calm. "How was he doing? Did you get to talk to him long?"

  Jonathan, a little taken aback, frowned at them. "No, he. He barely told me his name before he bolted. Am I missing something here?"

  "Dante Vicario is the son of Lietta and Caro Vicario." Aglaé, surprisingly, spoke up, drawing their attention. Aglaé didn't even look up from his book, turning a page idly as he continued. "The Vicario family are the founders and owners of the world's leading company in computer science research and development."

  Damon sat back, satisfied. "Exactly."

  Jonathan grimaced, a little in frustration and a lot in annoyance. "And how again does this relate to me knowing the name?"

  "The Vicarios have been my family's clients for years." Damon waved a hand dismissively, his other arm crossed over his chest. "Maybe you heard your mom mention them or saw the name on one of her court documents."

  Jonathan might've relented, might've agreed at that, but Niculaie's entire posture drooped in almost a guilty way and no, Jonathan wasn't about to buy that easy an explanation. There had to be a little more than just that. For the moment, though, he settled for nodding along and dropping it. Damon quickly moved the topic along to what they should do about the computers in the towers and Jonathan tuned him out, opting to watch the rest of the cafeteria.

  Vicario never returned. Maybe that was a good thing.