#and more concerned that eventually the Park is straight up going to take a hit on River because he's such a nuisance

[disappearinginq]

WIP WEDNESDAY

tagged by @cartwrong

I have no idea what the rules are to this game, so WE HAVE NO RULES.

Ahem.

Enjoy a random excerpt from Slow Horses fic of dubious origin and plot:

Compared to Lamb’s normal throwaways, Cartwright was almost competent. Lamb never felt like he had to keep a tight leash on the young man because of all the Slow Horses, Cartwright was the only one there because of someone else’s mess - because he’d been a little too good at being a spy, and caught the wrong people at the right time.

It made Lamb complacent.

Lazy, he cursed to himself on the fifth day. Lazy, and fucking stupid.

Because he allowed himself to forget that River’s ambition and talent were soundly outdone by his absolute shit fuck awful luck.

If David Cartwright hadn’t been River’s grandfather, Lamb doubted River’s disappearance would’ve received more than a dismissive ‘good riddance’ from Taverner and her Dogs.

One - admittedly frequently- missing agent from Slough House was hardly worth putting the entirety of Downing Street on high alert.

After day six, it was clear that this wasn’t just an errant field agent who’d gone off on his own. Cartwright, even if he was feeling particularly spiteful of Lamb and his mild neglect form of leadership, never went radio silent for near a week. If he’d found something worth pursuing, he’d at least call to gloat about being right.

[g4rvez-r3id]

Back To You

Ex! Spencer Reid x Fem!BAU Reader

Synopsis: Spencer finally realizes that he wants you to stay and that he loves you and he proves to you just how much he does.

Category: Angst, Fluff, Smut

Warnings: 18+ MDNI established past relationship between spencer and reader, spencer being a lil shit, reader being depressed, cursing, mentions of Lauren arc, maeve arc, Grey’s Anatomy spoilers 4x17 “Freedom” and 11x21 “How to Save A Life”, heartfelt talks, love confessions, kissing, smut warnings: soft!dom spencer, cunnilingus, spencer is packing, praise, he whimpers (idc WHAT y’all say), unprotected sex, creampie (find a better word for this pls), a lil bit of aftercare and that should be it(?)

Author’s Note: here it is, the long awaited part three! sorry y’all i lowkey struggled to write this lmao, i hope y’all like this end to the 3-parter hehe 🤭 hope it was worth the wait! <3

part one part two

Spencer Reid was utterly bewildered when he headed into work that following week and saw that you didn’t show. That wasn’t like you. You were always at work, no matter what. Sure, you had a few sick days here and there and after your guys’ breakup, you’d taken a couple of days off but you were into work about a day or so later.

He chalked it up to your guys’ previous conversation. The one where he pushed you away. And he knew you needed time to deal with that. So, he went straight to work and didn’t think anything more of it.

But then a day turned into a few. And before he could march to Garcia’s lair and ask to track your phone down because he was concerned — and it didn’t help that his mind first went to you lying in a ditch somewhere — he instead went to Hotch and asked if maybe you were taking vacation time.

Thankfully, Hotch had told him that you indeed were taking vacation time but that you hadn’t gone into why you needed to.

But Spencer knew why.

He’d felt horrible about how things ended in the parking garage. He knew it was his fault. And he wanted to go make it right… with you, he just didn’t know how. And Spencer also worried that going to see you would just make things worse.

All he could think back to was when you guys dated. Things seemed so easy being with you. You understood the workload, since you’d had the same job, you let him ramble and listened to him — even when you weren’t dating anymore. And you were just such a good person and a good friend, no matter the cost. (The cost being his relationship with you when you hid the fact that you knew about Emily’s fake death). He didn’t think he’d ever forgive you for that. But now, since Maeve, since everything, since you were there for him, he was willing to finally push all of that aside and beg for you to come back to him.

He knew you were a hard person to convince. You held grudges like he did, which was why you two were in this mess now. But Spencer knew, eventually, you had to come back to work. But then he thought about it.

The chances of you transferring to a different unit, to a different city, maybe even to a different state because you could stand to see him any longer were high. Like previously stated, he knew you. And he knew from when you two were together that once your mind was made up, there was no changing it.

But he didn’t want you to. He hated that now he was realizing this, but now, he had to march down to your apartment and tell you how you truly felt. That he really didn’t want you to go.

And damn it, he was gonna do something about it right now.

You wondered if you’d ever recover from the hard blow Spencer Reid hit you with. It was like a punch in the gut, the fact that he wouldn’t let you in. It was to be expected, that he needed time to recover himself. But it hurt that he pushed you away, even though you knew that would happen.

Since what happened with Spencer in the parking garage, you had called in sick from work for a week or two. It wasn’t until Hotch literally texted you and asked if you were okay and if you wanted to formally request the month off to do so.

You hadn’t gone anywhere, you weren’t on any vacation and you weren’t seemingly blowing off work. You just needed time and right now, seeing Spencer in the office wouldn’t make it any better. This is what you would do, you’d wallow for a short amount of time and then move on.

Although you wouldn’t really move on. You’d pine silently and wait for the day you stop having feelings. It’s what happened with Spencer before and it’d likely happen again.

So, you sat in your living room, re-watching Grey’s Anatomy for about the third time. The men absolutely sucked in this show. You were wearing your sweatpants and a white tank top with your hair looking like a rat’s nest. You showered last night but unfortunately didn’t have the energy to blow dry your hair so it dried over your pillow covers and you woke up the next morning with your hair looking absolutely atrocious. You slumped on the couch, stuffing your face with chocolate ice cream and frowning at the screen as Meredith shows Derek she’s ready to commit to their relationship by designing a floor plan for their home. What’s the point when he’s just gonna die anyways? Someone always dies and someone always gets hurt.

You only planned in sulking on your couch for another day but you certainly didn’t plan on someone knocking outside your door rapidly.

“No one’s home.” You grumbled as you took another scoop of your ice cream from your spoon into your mouth. The knocking continued once more. “Go away!” You demanded. But the knocking wouldn’t let.

So, you groaned, pausing the TV and getting out of your blanket, putting your ice cream to the side and walking towards the door. You look through the peephole and scoff when you see who’s at the door.

“No fucking way.” You say loudly for him to hear. “Y/n, will you just open the door, please?” Spencer pleads with you. “Why should I let you in when you’ve never bothered to let me in?”

Spencer closes his eyes as he curses to himself. He supposed he deserved that. He says your name again as he rests his palm on the wood of the door. “Please, just open the door. Can we talk?”

“What is there to talk about, Spencer?” You question, crossing your arms and you choose to stand your ground, deciding not to open the door. “Open the door, please. I’d rather your neighbors not hear.”

You roll your eyes and decide to give him the benefit of the doubt. You unlock the door and open it. “You have two minutes. Two.” You lean to the side so Spencer can walk in to your apartment.

You quickly check your watch. “You’ve got,” You click your tongue. “A minute and fifty-four seconds remaining. Make it count.”

“I should’ve asked you to stay.” Spencer started. “I should’ve asked you to stay a long time ago. But Maeve… the whole thing with her… it broke me. And maybe I’m beyond repair and maybe I will never be over her, but you should not have to suffer because of it. I’ve… been… an ass.” You knew it was serious when he cursed. He rarely ever did.

“Strong beginning.” You comment, your arms carefully crossed over your chest in defense. Spencer noted to this being something you did every time you two fought.

“I wanted you to stay. Trust me, I did. And still do. But I can’t burden you with this. With my… pain. You’ve done so much for me already. Taking care of me, making sure that I was okay, being there for me when I was heinous to you after our breakup. We barely spoke a word to one another before then and you knew that but you were still there. I guess I just… don’t know how to do this. I… I was given another chance and I… couldn’t save Maeve. I’m scared that if I let you in… it could…” Wind up the same way. He doesn’t finish but you figure that’s what is about to come out of his mouth.

It made sense now. Why he pushed you away. He didn’t owe you an explanation, because you knew why he did. At least, later you did. But your heart couldn’t cope with the heartbreak and you asked for the time off anyways. You needed it. At least, your heart did. You owed her that much.

Spencer looked defeated as he stood in front of you. Like he couldn’t lose the one thing that seemed to fit in the puzzle piece of the void. He knew he didn’t deserve you. And he would be okay with the fact if you had just kicked him out this second.

Instead, you stood in front of him and your shoulders sank out of defense mode and into a shy tone. You thought to yourself for a moment before you turned back to him.

“Spencer,” You start hoarsely and walk towards him slowly and carefully like he was ready to break like glass. “How come you let me into your apartment after what happened to Maeve? You could’ve let JJ in or Garcia.” The burning question lingered for so long, you had taken the opportunity to ask here and now.

His answer was simple. “Because you’ve seen me in that state before. It’s so easy to mask my emotions in front of JJ or Garcia or Morgan. With you, I knew I could feel anything and not have you look at me out of pity. Because you’ve been there before.”

You swallow at that answer as you walk over to him, face to face with him. (Of course, you’re a tad shorter than him so you have to look up at him a bit).

You extend a hand and caress his face with your palm and he nuzzles into it like a cat to a scratch post and closes his eyes tightly as he grabs your wrist, as if he’s wanting to keep your hand there. Your eyes lilt down from his eyelids to his plump lips and you shake your head.

“Where did we go wrong?” You ask in a whisper. And you’re almost afraid for his answer. You’re entirely aware of where you went wrong. It was your fault, after all. And suddenly, you don’t want to hear his answer as he parts his mouth and looks into your eyes. “Never mind,” You say. “I remember.” Your tone is somber.

And Spencer knows why. Sure, he was upset and honestly, he had the right to be after you kept the fact that their close friend had faked her death and you knew about it but didn’t tell him. But he was willing to put that all behind him just to have you back in his life again.

“It doesn’t matter anymore,” He said and you looked up at him with wide eyes at this. “It was a long time ago. And I can’t stand not having you in my life any longer.”

“Spencer…”

“I love you.”

The words fall out of his mouth so easily. “I love you, so much. I know we didn’t get it right last time but I want to, this time. I have always loved you.”

“But Maeve?” You ask.

“She was my past and I’ll always be grateful for the time that I had with her, even if it was short.” He admits but he takes your face into his hands, so tenderly as he looks you in the eyes. “But you… I’ll be damned if you’re not my future, Y/n. I’m sorry for how I’ve been. I’m sorry for how I’ve acted. You’re stuck in my head and I just… can’t seem to get you out of it, not that I’ve ever wanted to, anyways. But, Y/n, I’d go back to you. In a heartbeat. And my head is the most clearest it’s ever been so don’t you dare accuse me of just saying this on a whim. Because it’s not a whim.”

Spencer Reid knew you too damn well. He’d broken your heart in two, sure, but when it healed, it continued to still beat for him. You’ve always loved him and you never stopped. He held the darkest parts of you but he never once tried to fix them, he embraced them.

“I love you.” He said, out of breath. “Will you let me love you again?”

You stare up at him and instead of answering, you lean impossibly closer and your lips graze his and you don’t know who leans closer — you or him — (you later confirm that it was definitely him) and your lips connect.

The coffee taste is familiar in his mouth as his lavender scent fills your nostrils and he holds your face closely as he swallows you whole. Eventually, breathing becomes a chore and Spencer takes this opportunity to set you on the kitchen counter as his lips connect with your neck and you close your eyes as you feel all of him all at once.

Your hands explore his back, trying to shake his cardigan off of him — no matter how sexy it looks on him — and you are successful as it comes off of him and lands on the floor, revealing one of his dress shirts underneath.

You’re too busy admiring his body when he takes a moment, looking at you and taking in your features. He’s been here before. You’ve been here before. He’s home.

Realizing what he’s done, he knows you deserve better than being mauled on your marble counter and looks at you for permission before hoisting you to his waist and finds your bedroom, letting you get down and lay on your bed as you look at him, only in love and admiration.

He begins to unbutton his dress shirt and tear off his slacks and you take this opportunity to shake out of your sweatpants and your hair out of your elastic hair band. He’s left in his boxers and you’re left in your top and underwear.

He stares down at you, eyes full of lust and love and he smirks down at you and God, that should not have been so hot.

Spencer leaned down to kiss your lips and then kissed your neck and your collarbone. He shakes you out of your top and kisses each your breasts and then your bare stomach and then gets to his destination and with nimble fingers, pulls at the waistband of your underwear and pulls them off, flinging them across the room and looks at you as your rest yourself on your elbows so you can see the show.

You feel as his hot breath sigh into your pussy and you tilt your head back, dizzy by the sight in front of you. You had to have been dreaming. Surely, this is God’s cruel way of hurting you even more by making you have a vivid sex dream about your ex-boyfriend. (Or was he your boyfriend again?)

But when his tongue licks a stripe over your entrance, it’s confirmed. You’re definitely not dreaming, but definitely on Cloud 9.

He licks at your hole a couple of times before putting his mouth on your clit and making figure-8s with his tongue and your dig your hands into his messy locks and pull him impossibly closer.

And with his hands, he takes them out of his hair and holds them, interlocking his fingers with yours and Jesus, you might cum too soon from the sight alone.

The one thing you always liked about Spencer in bed was his expertise on sex despite not being very experienced himself. After your first time together, you were surprised to find out he’d only done it one other time because of just how damn good he was at it.

You wanted to hold out for him, but the way he looked at you and then moaned into your pussy, “That’s it,” He said. “Cum on my tongue.” It made you cum. Hard. You gasped out his name as he lapped up everything you gave him.

Eventually, he let go of your hands and let you take breather as he climbed over you and stroked your face with his hand. “Are you okay? We can stop here.” Ever the gentleman, even after giving you an orgasm that made you think you’d gone to heaven.

“You are crazy if you think I’m going another day without having your dick inside of me.” You joked and he lightly chuckled as he removed his boxers and you eyed what you were working with.

Also, another reason you were surprised he wasn’t lucky with the ladies in the past before you. He was well endowed despite being lanky and skinny.

“Wait,” You stop before he can press his cock towards your pussy and he divides his attention right onto you, willing to end this right here and now because you stopped him. “Are you okay? Because if you want to stop, we can.”

His heart swells for you even more. He understands why you’re asking him. But he was true to his word. His head was the clearest it’d ever been.

“I’m the greatest I could ever be right now,” Spencer admits. “I’d only ever want to stop if you wanted me to.”

Your eyes bore into him as you smile at him, caressing his face with your index finger, touching his plump bottom lip with it and you see the essence of you on his face, something that reminded yourself that he belonged to you. And only you. “Ready?” He asks, breaking your focus from his lips and you nod as you gasp, “Yes.”

Spencer breaks his focus away from you for a moment as he slides himself towards your entrance. You gasp out as you feel him sheath himself into you and his fingers interlock with yours beside your head as he bottoms out into you. Your body welcomes him and it’s as if your body remembers his.

“God, you’re tight,” He told as he shut his eyes and tilted his own head back because of how good it felt. How good you felt. “You feel so good.”

“So do you.” You manage to get out and his head is tucked into your neck as you hear his whimpers as he rocks into you, his only wish to make you feel as good as you’re making him feel.

He mumbles into your collarbone, trying to take you to the edge with him with his words.

“You take me so well.”

“You’re so beautiful.”

“I love how you tighten around me.”

The praise had made you rock your own hips back into him as you plead, “Harder, Spencer, please.” You beg and he commands at your wish as he fucks you into the bed even harder now. Your whines are more high-pitched as your nails dig into his back as he rails you and your bed begins to creak loudly.

“Let’s—Let’s cum together,” Spencer tells. “Where do you want it?” You gasp, “Inside, inside, please.”

You beg him, wrapping your legs around his torso and he plows into you even harder and then you feel him shudder and that’s send you over the edge as you feel his hot seed paint your insides.

You stare up at the ceiling as he collapses over your body, his hand still tightly perched into yours and his hot breath panting over your collarbone. Your hand rakes over his now sweaty chocolate locks and you hold him close to your body, not ready to let him go. It’s so peaceful as you both sit there in the silence.

But eventually, all good things come to an end and you whimper as he pulls out of you due to how sensitive you are. You close your eyes in slumber as he leaves the room, muttering something to you before he leaves and the next time you open your eyes, he’s back with a bottle of water and a warm rag to clean you up.

He takes a moment to gawk at your pussy and his cum leaking out of you before cleaning you up. You flinch at the contact at first, but he assures to you that it’s mandatory to clean you up after sex.

When he’s done, he expels the rag into your hamper and tucks you in under the covers, shortly joining you after he does so.

You turn on your side, facing him and going to hold by his torso and Spencer smiles to himself as he wraps his arms around you and quickly leans over to grab the water bottle and you open your eyes as he opens up the cap and puts the bottle to your mouth, wanting you to at least take a sip. You do so and he smiles as he puts the cap back on and then puts the bottle on the desk next to the bed.

Spencer looks down at you, playing with a strand of your hair and shortly rubbing your back soothingly, drawing out mathematical equations on your back and gazing lovingly down at you. When you woke up tomorrow, he’d be right here, right next to you and he wouldn’t leave until you were begging him to.

He meant every word he said to you. He loved you and he wanted to make it work with you again. The past was what it was — the past. And you were his future. He let you go once, over something that you had no choice but to keep from him and he let his pain get in the way of your relationship. No way was he about to make the same mistake again.

Over a few months ago, you two were barely speaking, only talking to each other when your jobs depended on it. And now, he couldn’t go another minute without speaking to you.

He got you back and this time, he had no intentions of letting you go.

[qprstobin]

home back to you - pt. 2

The long awaited part 2 of the Stomarol post-s2 fic! Tommy has an anxiety spiral and then is foiled by Steve's tiny bodyguards.

Pt. 1 | Ao3 Link

Minor TW: some ableist language, Carol and Tommy continue to be bitter towards Nancy and Jonathan, and basically the entire first part involves Tommy fighting off an anxiety attack.

For a moment, Tommy was so dizzy that he thought he might pass out.

This was his fault.

Tommy did this.

He’s the reason his ex best friend, the guy he- the guy who has- he’s the reason Steve was this banged up. The reason their season was likely ruined. The reason Steve missed school for a week.

He had just wanted Steve to look at him again.

Tommy waited until Steve was out of sight before blearily making his way towards the parking lot. The school was quiet, most of the clubs having been over and done with for the day by now. The only sounds were coming from the janitor a hallway over, the newspaper room, and his own heavy footfalls.

His mind was racing so fast that he was having trouble actually thinking. He tripped over the lip of the door leading outside and sighed gratefully as a burst of cold air hit him.

Carol was leaning against the side of his beat up pickup truck, inspecting her nails. The smack of her gum was audible even across the empty parking lot. Tommy could barely hear it over the ringing in his ears. When she saw him heading her way, a mean grin lit up on her face.

Normally, the look would get his heart pumping, but right now his heart was stuck in his throat.

“You’ll never guess who I just saw drive off together,” she said, glee and something like distaste at war on her face. Her chest was heaving, and Tommy let himself be distracted by her – everything for a moment, watching the rise and fall of the Hawkins H on her cheer uniform.

When he didn’t immediately say anything in response, she seemed to realize that something was wrong.

“Babe, are you okay?”

The concern leaking into her voice made Tommy feel hot. Anger started to drown out the panic coursing through his body.

Instead of answering her question, he snapped at her. 

“Get in the car.” He wanted to get out of this godforsaken parking lot in front of this godforsaken school in this godforsaken town. “We can talk about it at yours.”

Carol stared at him, affronted. That was good – anything was better than the concern that made his skin itch . (Or, that’s what he told himself, at least.)

She glared at him for another moment before he finally snapped – “Get in the car!”

She made an offended noise high in her throat, but got in the car.

Tommy got in as well, slamming the door shut behind him in a way that had less to do with anger and more to do with the lock sticking.

They didn’t speak as he pulled out of the parking lot. He stared straight ahead, his knuckles white against the steering wheel. The silence was stifling, taking up more space than it should in the cab of his truck. 

Finally, Carol couldn’t hold it in any longer.

“I don’t know what crawled up your ass and died, but it does NOT give you the right to talk to me like that,” she told him. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see that she had crossed her arms and was glaring at him. A typical angry Carol pose. 

Tommy forced himself to breathe, trying to release the anger and anxiety out of him in one long exhale. It kind of worked.

“You’re right,” he said, flexing his fingers against the wheel and shooting her a (hopefully) suitingly regretful look. “I’m sorry.”

Carol sniffed but settled more comfortably into her seat.

“Apology accepted.”

Silence fell over them again, but it was much warmer this time. She put her hand on his knee, and it was the most grounded that he felt all day.

“What was it you wanted to tell me earlier?” he asked eventually, as they got closer to her house. He was hoping to put off the inevitable meltdown he was going to have, wanting the easy distraction of high school gossip. She loved sharing gossip with him.

(Even if he wasn’t as good at dishing as Steve had been.)

( don’t think about Steve yet, don’t do it- )

But then she hesitated.

“I-” she started, surprising him. “Maybe it should wait.”

Tommy’s stomach cramped. She was still mad at him.

God, he just kept fucking shit up. Could he do just one thing right, and not take out his issues on his girlfriend?

“I said I was sorry, Carrie,” he pleaded, trying to keep his focus on not crashing instead of the pit opening up in his stomach.

“No, no, it’s not that. I know you’re sorry,” she said, trying to head off a more intense apology. He couldn’t see it but he could certainly hear the eye roll she just gave. “I just have a feeling that what I saw might be related.”

That-

That wasn’t much better.

“Let’s wait – like you said. We’re almost there.”

Tommy tightened his hands once more on the steering wheel. He didn’t really remember the rest of the short drive, arriving there on autopilot. His face felt like it was vibrating, pins and needles prickling along his jawline.

His ears were ringing again by the time he parked and made it into Carol’s house. Both her parents were out again – her father at some sort of meeting while her mother was at work. It really was crazy how many people he knew who had parents that were just never fucking there-

“Babe – Babe!” 

His spiral was shattered by Carol’s hand on his face.

“Deep breaths,” she told him and he complied without protest. “Now drink this, and tell me what happened.”

A glass of water was shoved into his hand, which he drank dutifully in one long gulp. He accidentally slammed the empty glass down on the island when he was done, making himself wince. 

“Steve’s back in school,” he started, flexing his hands against the edge of the counter. “You saw him earlier, yeah?” Now that he thought about it, he was pretty sure the two had a morning class together.

“Yeah, I saw him this morning,” she replied casually as she popped a new stick of gum in her mouth. Tommy would’ve gotten annoyed if he didn’t know it was a nervous tick of her own. “Saw him after practice, too. Jonathan Byers was driving him home.”

That stopped him up short.

“Creepy Byers?” he exclaimed in shock. Some part of him registered that this is what she wouldn’t tell him in the car, what had gotten her so worked up after practice.

“Creepy fucking Byers,” she repeated, popping her gum for emphasis. “Like, bad enough they eat lunch together when he’s not hiding in the dark room, but now he’s giving him rides? What’s up with that? Especially since I definitely saw him kissing Princess Wheeler in the hallway on Friday.”

“Ugh, gross .”

“Right?!” 

The two fell into a mutually put off silence. Carol had refilled his glass, and he was starting to feel more and more like a real person with every swallow.

“Is it true? Billy did that?” she asked finally.

Tommy’s breath stuttered. She didn’t have to clarify what ‘that’ was. He couldn’t speak, could only nod.

“Fuck,” she said under her breath, then louder, “Fuck! What a fucking psycho! Steve looks even worse than he did after Byers kicked his ass, and that creep beat his face into the pavement!”

His stomach cramped again and his hands were threatening to start shaking again. She kept talking, too caught up in her anger to realize that he was no longer following along.

“Like? Who does something like that? Why would he do something like that? Was Steve too pretty for him or something-” 

“It was my fault,” he said, cutting her off. He’d feel bad about it if he wasn’t two steps away from losing his absolute shit.

“What the hell are you talking about?” she asked incredulously. She popped her gum aggressively.

“It’s my fault,” he repeated, pressing his hands into his eyes. “I wanted this. I asked for this.”

“You wanted Billy to beat the shit out of Steve,” Carol said more than asked, though the question was still clear in her voice. He could picture the skeptical tilt of her brow perfectly.

“Yes! No! Of course not! I just-” he wasn’t sure how to put it into words without ripping himself open. “I thought – well, I guess I thought that if someone actually challenged Steve’s… throne or whatever, maybe he’d…. It’s stupid.”

“What’s stupid?”

“I just…”

“Yes?”

“I wanted him to look at me again.”

She made a noise of understanding, and he could hear her nails tapping against the counter in thought.

“Set someone up to challenge his throne, make him realize that he’s losing his precious social capital, and hopefully make him remember who his real friends are,” she mused aloud, making his poor jumble of half formed thoughts sound like an actual sensible plan. “That was actually not a bad plan, babe.” She popped her gum, sounding unbothered in a way that made him bristle.

“Well, look how it turned out! Our season is fucked, Billy has lost his fucking mind, Steve got his face beat in worse than even what Byers did, and Steve is never going to want to talk to me again, because it’s all my fucking fault!”

Carol didn’t respond immediately. He didn’t exactly take this as confirmation that he was the worst person on the face of the earth, but it definitely didn’t help stop the stinging in his eyes.

Before he could spiral too hard, however, she was prying his hands from his face. Lights popped in front of his eyes, and he had to blink them away in order to see how pissed her expression was.

“Don’t be stupid,” she told him once he stopped blinking. “Billy does what Billy wants. Sure, maybe you made a bad choice in friends but we were all blinded by his mullet and abs, not just you.” He made a noise in protest at that, blushing furiously. “You didn’t tell him to go fight Steve, did you?”

Tommy couldn’t do anything but shake his head in response, shocked at how fast the anger had returned to her.

“Exactly! No matter what your intentions were, this isn’t your fault. We don’t even know why they fought in the first place, and neither of them seem to be fessing up.”

This last bit really seemed to piss her off. Which didn’t surprise Tommy at all – Carol hated not knowing something. She thrived on a certain cultivation of information, she had to know everything about everyone in order to stay anywhere near the top.

Her and Steve had an absolutely insane ‘network of informants’ before Steve had stopped talking to them.

Tommy knew he wasn’t the only one who missed Steve like a phantom limb.

She slammed her hand down on the counter suddenly, breaking him from his thoughts. 

“Get that look off your face, you look like you’ve been listening to too much of Steve’s sad British music,” she said. He sputtered at that, but didn’t get a chance to respond. “Listen, you feel that bad about Billy going psycho? Then do something about it! Do something to fix it! Apologize! Take some responsibility instead of moping like a little baby.”

He blinked at her in shock for a second, and couldn’t help the way his lips twitched. 

“Wow, thanks for the advice, Dr. Perkins,” he said. He couldn’t keep the grin from his face as her mouth twisted into a scowl. “Got any more for me? Some sort of plan? Steve didn't seem eager to talk to me today.” He tried not to show how much that fact hurt.

“Oh, go fuck yourself,” she snapped, crossing her arms with a huff. Then she popped her gum as a thoughtful look crept onto her face. “Well, I do have a few ideas…”

–

Tommy felt good having a plan of attack. Not only had seeing Steve left him feeling extremely unsteady, but it also excited him knowing that finally, finally, he was going to be getting his best friend back.

All he had to do was wait for the right time.

It should’ve been easy.

Steve was still benched and so only came to every other practice for morale’s sake. Also, so he could chat strategy with his co-captain and the coach. They didn’t share any classes together this semester, and only shared one of their lunch periods. Which, he never ate in the cafeteria anymore anyway. 

Tommy and Carol agreed that Steve needed some time to heal, and they needed some time to start putting distance between them and Billy. Vicki might still be infatuated with the man, but they weren’t the only ones becoming wary of him.

In the end, Tommy only lasted about a week and half.

It was one of Steve’s off days (by request) and so he should’ve been home by now.

But his car was still in the parking lot. Steve was still in the parking lot.

The bruises were starting to fade, turning his face a sick green color. His now customary sunglasses were perched on his nose, making him look like a douchebag. (Tommy hated how good they looked on him.) A cigarette dangled from bitten down lips.

Tommy tore his eyes away from Steve’s mouth.

He started heading towards him without a thought, wanting nothing more than to apologize for all the shit he’s said behind his back the past year. For the hand he had in his fight with Billy. Wanted to tell him he wasn’t even mad that Steve called him an asshole and ditched him.

(Well, he was actually still a little pissed about that, but it didn’t even matter anymore.)

His mission was halted as a skateboard slid in front of him. 

“Where the fuck-” he exclaimed, barely managing to keep from tripping over it and eating asphalt. When he righted himself again, he found he was surrounded by three middle schoolers all glaring at him.

He’s pretty sure he’s seen this movie before – something about Kids in a Cornfield?

Regardless, Tommy had seen these kids before, trailing behind Steve or Byers after school. Once or twice he had seen them at the arcade when he had been stopping by Family Video to drop off a tape. 

Normally though, there were five of them that he would see with Steve. He looked over to where the other teen was standing to see that his attention had been taken by the two missing kids, excitedly yelling about something or another.

“What do you want with Steve?” one boy asked. St. Clair, maybe?

Tommy sputtered, “What do you mean what do I want with him? I just want to talk to him!”

The only girl of the group stepped forward, her skateboard clenched under her arm like some sort of weapon. 

Which, considering she had just tried to kill him with it, it sort of was.

“Did Billy send you?” she asked.

That startled Tommy.

“Billy? Like Billy Hargrove?”

“Don’t play stupid – though I’m sure that’s hard for you,” she scoffed, which, rude , “I know you’re friends with him. I’ve seen you two together before. He’s also mentioned you a few times, though not as much as he complains about Steve.”

Billy’s little sister.

Billy had mentioned her before – normally when complaining about how watching her took up so much of his time. Not to mention how of a brat she apparently was. But Tommy had never actually met her before. He’d seen her hanging around Steve more than he’d ever seen her hang around Billy.

There was probably a reason for that.

“Billy didn’t send me. I’ve barely talked to him in almost two weeks,” he said, trying not to blink as he stared down Baby Hargrove. She bared her teeth at him and he flinched slightly. A pleased look came across her face. “Not since…” he trailed off.

It was obvious to all of them what it was that caused them to stop talking.

The three kids shared a quick, wordless conversation, communicating in a flurry of waggled eyebrows, hand gestures, and full body eye rolls. Tommy was reluctantly impressed. He wished he could do that with Carol or Steve, or even Nicole.

“Just because he isn’t talking to my douchebag brother anymore, doesn’t mean we should just let him do whatever he wants! It could be a long con!” Baby Hargrove said aloud, stomping her foot childishly and casting suspicious eyes back at him.

The first boy shushed her as they all sent wary glances back at Steve, but Steve was still enthralled by the excited story the two other kids were telling him. His cigarette was starting to go out, now clutched loosely between his fingers.

“I don’t think he’s smart enough for a long con,” the second boy, who couldn’t be anyone other than Nancy Wheeler’s bratty kid brother, said with a sneer.

“It doesn’t matter, we all agreed – until Steve is no longer concussed, we aren’t letting Hargrove or his friends mess with him,” St. Clair reminded them, his hands moving towards his hips in a parody of a move that Tommy had seen Steve do time and time again.

It would be kinda cute if he wasn’t actively keeping Tommy from talking to Steve.

“Remind me why we are letting him drive us around when his head is even emptier than normal?” Baby Wheeler scoffed.

Baby Hargrove perked up. “I could drive.”

“No!” Both boys whisper-yelled in response.

“You guys are such babies.”

The back and forth was starting to drive Tommy insane. (Though he had to agree with the boys – letting Baby Hargrove drive seemed like a bad idea. He’d seen the way Billy drove, after all.) He needed to talk to Steve now .

His eyes flickered back to Steve, wondering if he should make his move while his tiny bodyguards were distracted.

“Don’t even think about it, asshole,” Baby Wheeler sneered, seeing where his eyes went.

Tommy was starting to see why the kid got on Steve’s nerves so much when he first started dating Princess Wheeler. Hot and cold didn’t even begin to cover it.

“Tommy!” Carol had suddenly appeared behind him, making him jump. 

The kids hadn’t noticed her walking up either. Baby Wheeler hissed like a cat in surprise and Baby Hargrove had hoisted her skateboard up like a shield in front of her and St. Clair. 

Tommy turned automatically, like a moth to a flame, his eyes catching on a still distracted Steve before making eye contact with Carol.

Who was pissed.

Fuck.

“We had a deal,” she reminded him, crossing her arms with a huff. “We had a plan ”

He grimaced. “Sorry, babe.”

She pouted at him, but then looked over his shoulder to where Steve still was and sighed.

“Whatever, it’s fine. Not like you made much progress. Let’s just get out of here,” she said, popping her gum loudly. 

He wanted to protest – after all, Steve was right there , even if there were several children in the way – but she cut him off with a meaningful look. He wasn’t quite sure what she was getting at (this would be a great time for him to gain the type of mind reading skills the middle schoolers had shown earlier) but gave in.

Carol grabbed his hand and threaded her fingers through his, and he allowed himself to be tugged towards his car. There would be other opportunities to talk to Steve, he knew it.

He cast a glance over his shoulder at the kids – who were still giving him suspicious looks. St. Clair pointed at his eyes and then back at him in the universal ‘I’m watching you’ signal while Baby Hargrove tapped her shoes against the edge of her board menacingly.

Tommy tried to resist, he did, but couldn’t help looking over their heads at Steve. Who was finally looking back, noticing him for the first time. He’d pushed the sunglasses up onto his head, and was watching them walk away. There was a look on his face, one that Tommy couldn’t parse. It looked like annoyance and regret all rolled up into one. 

Whatever it was made him want to turn around right then, plans and appropriate settings be damned. Instead, he let himself continue to be pulled away by Carol, and raised his hand in an awkward wave that immediately left him embarrassed.

But then, miraculously, Steve waved back. 

[raymondvelez]

Declarations

Michelle is one of those girls who’s always looking for the next best thing. Whatever situation she sees herself in, good or bad, there’s always a way she can improve upon it. Got a great job with flexible hours and a generous retirement plan that matches up to 6% of your contribution? There just has to be another one that offers the same plan but pays more annually with more vacation time. Spot a parking space in a crowded parking lot on a Sunday that’s easy to pull right in? There just gotta be one that’s closer to the store and the shopping carts. Got a boyfriend that takes initiative and plans out the entire date night? Why can’t Los Cruz find a restaurant with a five-star review and a rooftop overseeing the Chicago skyline? 

So when my relationship with my girlfriend started to feel like we had hit a rough patch that started to feel stagnant and routine, I knew it was only a matter of time before Michelle would eventually try to explore her options. Afterall, having separate apartments is nice because it gives us time to miss each other, but we can’t start building equity until I sign for that condo in Lincoln Park I can’t afford on my own unless I get that job at that investment firm I’ve been interviewing for. So I better pass my series 7 exam because what woman in her thirties wants to date a man for longer than two years without any possibility of an engagement ring? Anything longer than that and I’m standing in the way of her future husband that God already has picked for her. 

That’s why when I heard the doorbell ring and I let Michelle into my apartment and she made her way straight for my bathroom to finish her makeup without kissing me, despite her already being thirty minutes late, I knew better than to not feel somewhat uneasy. Michelle may be a lot of things but tardy was not one of them. And her not greeting me with a kiss? She hadn’t done that since that one time she had to pee really bad and had to run straight for my bathroom in fear that she wouldn’t make it if she walked. But that was just the thing. She didn’t have to pee that bad. As a matter of fact, when I didn’t hear her slam the bathroom door shut, I pretended to need to get something to drink from the fridge so I would have an excuse to pass by a bathroom that was occupied by a distracted Michelle fixing her eyelashes. Michelle is one of those glamour girls who take pride in their social media like appearance, so her fixating on such detail wasn’t unusual. But her closing the bathroom door when I passed by again and saw her texting while smiling was. I heard her put the toilet seat down, but I think it was all for show because I never heard the toilet flush, or the faucet come on for her to wash her hands. There wasn’t a chance in hell that Michelle peed and forgot to wash her hands. That’s just not who she is. Cleanliness is next to Godliness and Michelle was convinced that she had fallen from the sky and that her wings would be returned to her the moment her wedding bells finally rang. 

I was already dressed and ready to go to dinner, so I had nothing else to do except sit in the sala and wait. But the longer it took for Michelle to come out of the bathroom, the more I wanted to get out of my dress shoes and put my basketball shorts back on. Because it wasn’t likely we’d make it to our reservation in time and I knew better than to rush perfection. Normally when I waited for Michelle to put the finishing touches on her eyeliner, I just watched ESPN and had another glass of wine while occasionally standing in the doorway of the bathroom to watch her apply her lipstick. I always appreciated having a beautiful girlfriend take additional time to look her best for me. I really did. But for the first time in our two year and five-month relationship, I got the impression that Michelle wasn’t nearly as concerned about my attention as she typically was. In fact, the more I thought about it the more I began to recall additional changes in Michelle’s habits recently. For instance, Michelle and I tend to go to each other’s apartments at least once a week and we’ll cook together. She has this old cookbook her grandma gave her that has all these southern recipes that she really loves using. I look forward to this weekly because not only are all the recipes great, but it gives me and Michelle a chance to grocery shop together and go on a scavenger hunt for everything required. I’ll push the shopping cart and just follow Michelle’s lead because I’ve learned very early in our relationship that Michelle knows what exactly what is needed when it comes to not only life, but in the kitchen as well. I’m not going to lie though. I love spending all types of time with my girl, so I really have nothing to complain about in that regard. We just be in the kitchen having a ball. I usually chop up the vegetables while my baby will handle the measuring cups and mixing bowls getting everything just right. But lately, that hasn’t been the case. In fact, I haven’t slept over her apartment in about a month now. And judging by how things have been going recently, I doubt she was spending the night at mine tonight. 

My iphone let off one of those calendar reminders concerning our dinner plans. That was my queue to walk over to the bathroom and see how much more time Michelle needed. 

“Babe, our reservation is in 10 minutes. Even if we leave now, we’re gonna be late.” I said through the door. 

Michelle opened the bathroom door so I could see that she was still working on her makeup. She didn’t didn’t even look in my direction. She just kept looking into the mirror as she reached for her lipstick. 

“That’s okay, babe. Can you just call and cancel it? I have a backup spot we can go to. I’m not that hungry anyway.” Michelle said. 

“What you mean you not that hungry? What you do? Scarf a grilled cheese sandwich while you was on the way?” I asked. 

“I mean I can eat. I’m just not starving.” 

“What’s the name of the backup spot you were talking about so I can reserve us a table.”

“They don’t take reservations. It’s a very chill spot.” Michelle said never taking her attention from the mirror. 

As Michelle applied her lipstick, my stomach began to turn. I had that feeling you get in your gut when you’re on a roller coaster and you underestimate how high the first drop actually is. Michelle’s hair was in what I think women describe as layers. Michelle styles her burnt orange colored hair in a variety of ways, but when it’s down and straightened the way she had it right now, it’s usually a special occasion or we’re meeting up with her friends. I couldn’t help but feel slighted. I couldn’t prove it, but I knew that she didn’t style her hair this way for me. We weren’t meeting up with her friends, and today was just another random Saturday night as far as I knew. 

I leaned against the doorway of the bathroom and just watched my girl stare into her reflection like I wasn’t there. It never occurred to me that Michelle was unhappy with me. Sure, there were things I could improve upon. Maybe I do read too much and focus heavily on things that don’t equate to advancing my banking career. But the truth was I made a comfortable living, the rent was always paid on time, and I liked being able to use my nights to write for the Chicago Reader. I currently had an internship with them, but it was non-paid, and they didn’t always publish my articles. In fact, they had only published one review I got to write because none of the staff writers wanted to go to a Dom Kennedy concert at the Metro. I was now certain that I had put off studying for my Series 7 exam for far too long. I realized that I wasn’t just trying to secure a promotion at an investment firm, I was now trying to sustain a relationship with who I was certain was my future wife. 

“Babe, I been doing really well at the firm so far. I forgot to tell you. I passed my SIE exam last Thursday.” I said. 

“That’s awesome baby.” Michelle replied while never taking the time to look my way. 

“Yeah. My market leader was also impressed with my cold calling. I closed 5 accounts for him last week. That’s a lot for someone who just started. I also been helping him increase his pipeline because the lead list I created was a majority of warm leads.” I explained. 

Michelle was now running her fingers through the flow of her hair like she was getting ready for prom. And I was beginning to feel like her prom date she really ain’t wanna go with, but she knew my parents would pay for our limo, so she said yes anyway. 

“Babe, are you mad at me?” I continued. 

“No. Why would I be mad at you?” 

“I don’t know. Just wanted to make sure. I just want to make sure we good.” I explained. 

“Why wouldn’t we be good, Los?” 

“I don’t know. I just wanted to make sure, Babe.” 

I started to feel embarrassed. I know nobody else was around except Michelle and I, but still, I hate not always being sharp and on point. Here I was creating scenarios that couldn’t be further from my so-called girlfriend’s mind, and I was trying to convince her and myself that my insecurities were right. Even if Michelle was disappointed in me at some point, she was probably over it. And if she wasn’t, she wasn’t going to admit to it right now. 

“I love you, Babe.”

“I love you too, Los.” 

I didn’t know what else to say. Maybe my insecurities were just getting the best of me. I know Michelle loved me. I’m not the best man Michelle could have, but I’m certainly not the worst. So maybe I spent a lot of my time prioritizing my artistic endeavors over us, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t pivot to being the man she ultimately wanted me to be. I mean, I was literally right there. Afterall, I found an investment firm to hire me. I just needed a couple more licenses and a few profitable quarters and I’d be on my way to not only being able to afford quite an impressive engagement ring, but that condo in Lincoln Park as well. You see, the truth is, I’m actually quite the talented banker. I’ve just been a little distracted because I really love journalism and banker’s hours were super conducive to my growth as a writer. But I have to be honest with myself and understand that the life of a writer rarely ever pays the bills. I was fortunate enough to be able to not just make a living but live an affluent life in beautiful neighborhoods where the potholes get covered immediately, and Michelle and I could send our bi-racial children to a quality public school because the taxes are higher in gentrified neighborhoods. 

“Babe, you look beautiful.” I said. 

“Thank you, Papi.” 

Michelle really did look beautiful. I wasn’t just saying it. I just hadn’t told her in a while because I was so distracted from studying annuities and call options and writing reviews no one would read, that I allowed my girl to feel neglected. Her hair honestly was quite the sight. I’ve dated numerous women with absolute beautiful hair, but not like my girlfriend’s. Michelle’s hair is gorgeous. Running my fingers through my baby’s hair while we lay in bed and watch reruns of America’s Next Top Model because it’s my baby’s turn to pick our show, is one of my favorite pastimes. I loved her hair so much I even recalled myself going easy on the way I yanked it when I was giving her back shots because God forbid I damaged it in some way, I could never forgive myself. Not that our rough sex was actually so rough that I would actually damage her follicles, but more that when you subconsciously find something to be so precious, you find yourself being reserved when it comes to how to handle it. Maybe that’s where me and Michelle went wrong. I had gotten so accustomed to treating my girl like the delicate flower that I knew she actually was, that I had forgotten that no matter how sweet and sensitive a woman is, she still and will always need to be fucked like you hated her. I don’t mean you fuck your girl in a misogynistic way, that’s not cool at all. But girls do want to be fucked in the same fashion that a misogynist would fuck them without you acting and making them feel that you’re an actual misogynist. I know it sounds confusing, but trust me, the more you learn about women and their complexities, the more this description of a women’s sexual preferences will make sense. 

“So, did you ever decide if we’re still going to that work event for your job. I picked up my suit from the cleaners and already put my business cards in the inside pocket of my blazer.” I explained. 

“Umm, I haven’t decided yet.” Michelle said. 

“You sure? Could be fun. Last year the food and drinks were pretty good.” 

“I know. But I’m not sure if I want to stay with the company.”

“What? But you just interviewed for that one position.” I explained. 

“Yeah, and I didn’t get it. And I don’t want to stay a project manager for the rest of my life, Los.” 

“Babe, you’ve only been with the company for a year and a half. You’ll get other opportunities. Have you talked with your manager about how you can improve?”

“I don’t want to talk about that right now. I’ll just update my resume, test the job market and see what’s out there.” Michelle expressed.

“I get it. But it is a good company, Babe. I would consider sticking it out. I can tell your manager likes you. And she seems like she’s doing what she can to develop you.” 

“She’s a hater. She clearly afraid I’m going to take her job. Fuck her.” 

“I mean that’s a possibility too. Only you can gauge her authenticity.” I said. 

I really felt that Michelle was in a great place in her career and that she had more reason than not to be supper excited about the possibilities of advancement. But maybe I was the last person on earth to help her realize that because it had become painfully obvious that she didn’t see me as ambitious as I actually was. I prioritized things that didn’t necessarily elevate me financially. Nobody cares about what you’re good at unless you can make money from it. And even though, ironically enough, I was good at something that could make money, Michelle would never unsee how okay I was with not making it, even though I was more than capable in the first place. In fact, I’m willing to bet that my recent influx of money actually made her angrier. No woman wants a Chanel bag from a man when he clearly could have gotten her one sooner and simply chose not to. Sure, she’s still going to take the bag. But it’s just in her best interest to make sure that she’s always in position to receive one. And if I was half the talented banker I saw myself to be, I would be able to understand these circumstances with no issue whatsoever. 

I walked back to the sala and just dropped myself on my couch not sure if I even wanted to go out anymore. Maybe I would stay home and let Michelle hang out with whoever it was she really wanted to hang out with. I preferred for it to be with me. But if it wasn’t, I was more than willing to accept that as well. 

[bluesfortheredj]

If I knew then.

A/N: A lot of angst ahead. Warning for indirect talk of a miscarriage.

Your breathing echoes into the phone as you await the person on the other end to answer and you twirl the cord around your forefinger nervously.

The line finally clicks as the receiver is picked up and the voice you desperately needed to hear answers with an exasperated sigh.

“Hello?”

“Eddie? Eddie… something…” your breath hitches as a cry threatens to escape your throat.

The exasperation soon makes way for a soft, concerned gasp, “(Y/N)? Are you okay? Where are you? What’s happening?” a string of anxious questions are thrown at you through the crackly line.

“Something bad has happened… something really bad,” you whisper despite there being no one around you.

“Where are you?” he repeats with a touch more urgency in his voice.

“I’m at the payphone outside the hospital.”

“Stay right where you are, I’m coming now.”

“You don’t-”

He closes his eyes in frustration and pinches the bridge of his nose, “just stay there… please. I won’t be long sweetheart.”

You nod even though he can’t see you, “okay,” then the lines goes dead and you carefully replace the receiver back on the unit before turning around and taking a few steps to the bench nearby.

It wasn’t a particularly cold night yet you found yourself shivering as the breeze passed you by and you wrap your arms around yourself to try and fight against the involuntary response. You don’t even register Eddie’s appearance until he gently places a hand on your quivering shoulder, and you snap your head up to look at his friendly yet concerned expression.

“Thank you for coming,” you whisper meekly.

He gives you a weak smile and a reassuring nod before gesturing to his van with his free hand, “it’s warmer in there.”

You stand and Eddie’s hand slides down to your back as you do, his protective instincts now fully taking over and not wanting to break the contact with you until he absolutely has to. He opens up the passenger door and you get inside slowly, wincing a little as you do so which catches Eddie’s eye straight away, then he carefully shuts it behind you and walks around the driver’s side where he gets in and the two of you sit in silence for a few moments.

“Where do you want to go?” Eddie eventually asks, his hands running around the steering wheel nervously.

“Is your uncle home?”

“Nah, he works nights, remember?”

You nod as you recall his schedule; you would have remembered if you hadn’t had such a traumatic past two days, “yeah, yeah, of course, I know.”

He finds the courage to turn your way finally and he slowly reaches his hand out to yours where it rests on your thigh, then he wraps his fingers around yours and holds it to try and comfort you in some small way; he can tell something is seriously wrong but he doesn’t want to push you for answers in your very obviously fragile state.

“It’s okay,” he says quietly as he takes his hand away and starts the van up, “everything will be okay, I promise.”

“I don’t think it will Eds… not this time.”

He opens his mouth to reply but after a quick glance at your frail frame curled in on itself he knows it’s best not to try and push the positive thoughts with something that had this much gravity to it. He drives carefully to the caravan park, noticing your flinches of pain whenever he hit a pothole or bump in the road, and he finally gets to breathes a sigh of relief when he parks up outside the trailer, knowing that he won’t be hurting you any more. You go to put your hand on the door to exit the van but within a flash Eddie is right there, opening the door for you and lending you a hand to help you out of the vehicle. He watches as you stay hunched over with one arm across your stomach as he helps you to the trailer and up the steps, then he settles you down on the chair inside and stands next to you wondering what to do next.

“Got any painkillers?”

Eddie jumps into action at your request and you can hear bottles and packets falling into the bathroom sink as he raids the cabinet above it for something for you, “got some!” he calls out triumphantly, racing back to your side with the bottle, “here.”

“Can I have some water please?”

He smacks his hand against his forehead at forgetting the most important thing, then fills a glass from the tap and passes it to you with an unsteady hand, dripping a little over the edge and onto your lap, “shit, sorry,” he gasps as he drops to his knees and begins to wipe your jeans with his hand.

“Eddie, it’s fine, don’t worry. It’s just water.”

“Yeah, but-” he stops suddenly, his whole body freezing at the glimpse of red that stains the otherwise blue fabric right between your upper thighs, and he stands up to back away while his brain tries to process what’s going on; all sorts of possible explanations for this sight running through his head and none of them any less terrifying than the one before it.

“Eddie,” you gulp, “Eddie, please.”

“I… uh… did someone…?” he asks in horror as he pushes his hair back from his increasingly hot face.

“No… no, nothing like that.”

You quickly pop two of the painkillers and observe Eddie as everything seems to click into place inside his head while he shrinks down onto the carpet with his head in his hands.

“I hadn’t heard from you in two days…” he begins, piecing everything together, “…you were in there on your own for two days… I should have been there (Y/N), why didn’t you call me before? I-,” he looks up at you, the tears already falling down your face at a rapid pace, “no, no, I’m sorry, this isn’t about me… this is totally out of order, I’m sorry, I just… I don’t know what to say.”

He crawls over to you and places his hands gently on your thighs as you hug your stomach once more, “I’m sorry (Y/N), you don’t need to say anything if you don’t want to.”

You lift one hand to cup his cheek with as you meet his apologetic gaze, “I didn’t even know, I had no idea until… I just thought it was normal monthly stuff… but then it all changed and by the time the doctors said what it was I was just…” you pause and take a deep breath, “numb. I couldn’t do anything, I couldn’t think, couldn’t eat or drink… I so desperately wanted you there Eddie, but I couldn’t even remember your number to tell the nurses. It all happened so fast, and yet so slow at the same time. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Eds.”

He shakes his head from side to side, making sure your hand doesn’t stray from his face by placing one of his on top of it, “no, no, you have nothing to be sorry for, don’t ever apologise… this may be a really fucking stupid question, but how do you feel?”

You drop your head for a moment before bringing your eyes back up to meet his, “it’s not a stupid question at all, and I’m really grateful that you asked it. I feel… empty. I know it sounds silly, I didn’t even know anything was there until it was too late, but I still feel the loss. Like my body knew something was there and now it’s gone… I don’t know, it’s strange. How do you feel?”

He sits back onto the floor and pulls away from your touch in doing so, then crosses his legs and strokes his jaw thoughtfully as you join him, carefully lowering yourself down to the carpet until he extends his arms and guides you into his lap so you can curl inwards to keep your stomach warm, “I’ve got you,” he soothes, one arm around your back while the other joins yours across your stomach, “nothing you said sounds silly by the way, not in the slightest. I… I don’t know how I feel… it’s all a bit…”

“Unbelievable.”

“Yeah,” he sighs, his fingers spreading across your abdomen as he thinks about what could have been, “we would have made it work.”

“You think?”

“I know. I would have done anything to make it work,” he says as his eyes well up with tears he didn’t expect.

“Oh, Eddie, don’t cry.”

He blinks back the tears as you snuggle into his body, “sorry… I think I know what you mean about feeling the loss even though we didn’t know it was there.”

“I’m so sorry,” you weep.

“Hey, no, don’t be sorry, you have nothing to be sorry for, it’s okay, we’ll get through this together, yeah? I love you more than anything (Y/N), I won’t leave your side, I promise,” he kisses your head as he begins to rock you back and forth gently while his hand rubs tender circles on your stomach.

“Thank you Eds, I love you too… but I’m sure Wayne won’t be too happy with me hanging around all the time,” you point out as you wipe your face with the back of your hand.

“Are you kidding? He won’t mind at all, honestly,” he takes a look at your face and sighs sadly, “you look so tired sweetheart, do you wanna go to bed?”

You nod and carefully move off of his lap onto the floor before using the chair to help you stand, and Eddie quickly jumps up to assist you down the hall to the bedroom before getting you a change of clothes and taking yours out to the bathroom to clean. Once he’s draped them over the side of the bath to dry he returns to the bedroom to find you curled up asleep and gently takes a seat by your side, brushing your hair away from your face delicately. He leans down and kisses your cheek softly before tiptoeing out of the room to wait for Wayne to return home so he could fill him in with what was happening; whatever the future would bring, you’d face it head on together.

[hotch-stufff]

hiii 47 and 7 for angst hotch

i love ur writing btw <3

Drunk

gif by hoe-tchner

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Reader

Warnings!: mentions of abuse, stalking, and death, past abusive relationships, normal criminal minds things, angst, crying, pining, but a fluffy ending

Promtps: Angst #7 "Are you drunk?", Angst #47 "You flinched"

Author's Note: Thank you so much <3, hope you enjoy reading!!

---------------

In hindsight, it probably wasn’ the best idea to get drunk at a bar. Especially alone. But you weren’t exactly thinking straight when you had stepped off the jet after a long case. And it had been a LONG case. Nearly a week of going through the same evidence over and over again scouring for a lead. Finally finding a lead, and coming to a dead end. 

The eventual lead that you did catch, led to the unsub already standing over her next victim’s body. At least you got a full confession. But you had been the one that had found the unsub. If that wasn’t enough, this case had already been hitting way too close to home. 

A woman was murdering victims of domestic abuse to “save them” because her mom was never “saved” from her father’s abuse. She had grown up watching it. Her victims had all had y/h/c hair, with y/e/c eyes. The same height as you, same style, just overall very similar. The only difference the team saw had been that you were never abused. At least that was what your file had said.

You had been able to keep it on the low for as long as you had been at the BAU. But you were terrified one of them would figure it out. That you would flinch at the wrong time, or you would do something to give it away.

You had gotten lucky and no one seemed suspicious. You ended up hiding in the back of the jet, curled up. No one bothered you. They all assumed that the case had just hit you harder. The one thing you hadn’t known though was that Hotch had been keeping a very close eye on you.

You two had become close, and would often hang out at each other's apartments. Spending tjme just talking about nothing and everything for hours. He had quickly become one of your best friends. You always went to him when you were upset.

But tonight, you just needed to get away.

Which is how you found yourself in this bar, downing your fifth drink. In the back of your mind, you knew that you wouldn't be able to drive home, or even walk without tripping over your own feet. You needed to call someone, and your drunk self called Hotch. While the phone rang you checked the time. 3 am. He was going to kill you.

“Hotchner.” You giggled drunkenly at his formal response.

“Why so serious bossman?” He recognized your voice immediately. 

“Y/n? Are you okay?” 

“M’great. Havin a blast.” You slurred.

“Are you drunk?” He asked and you giggled again.

“Mayyybe.” You slurred, concerning Hotch even more.

"Where are you?”

“Mabel's I think. But let me tell you. I think you need to come get me because there is no way m’drivin home.” He huffed as you heard noise coming from the phone.

“I'm on my way, stay there!” But you hung up. You were so excited to see him. Truth was you had definitely developed a crush for the man. Telling him that was going to be difficult, mainly because of your past, but also because he was your boss, and about 12 years older than you.

You waited for about 10 minutes before you heard the door ring as it opened and Hotch ran inside, frantically searching around. He found you and was quickly at your side.

“Y/n, are you okay?” You nodded sleepily. You always did get sleepy after your sixth drink. He gave you a concerned glance before reaching for your arm. You flinched slightly, but Hotch didn’t say anything about it. He picked you up because there was no way that you could walk, and carried you out to his car. 

“You’re staying with me tonight.” He had said once on the road. You lazily watched  out the window as buildings went by. 

“M’kay.” You mumbled. Hotch sent you another concerned glance. Something was wrong, but he couldn't quite figure out what. Usually when a case hit you hard, you would spend the night talking with him. He had been surprised when you hadn't shown up at his apartment. Even more shocked when you had called him drunk. He cared about you and it hurt him to see you like this.

Soon he found himself pulling into his driveway. He parked and quickly ran to your side of the car to help you out. He opened your door, and reached his hand over to unbuckle you when suddenly you shifted back. Your arms came up as if to block a blow and a whimper escaped your lips. 

“I’m sorry. I won’t do it again. I promise!” You let out, sounding much more sober now. Hotch stood there dumbfounded, not knowing what to do. 

“Y/n, it’s me, can you hear me, its Aaron?” You moved your arms from your face, peeking out wide eyed. You pulled your arms the rest of the way down. 

“Sorry Hotch. That was just, um, that w-was-” But he cut you off.

“You flinched.” He paused looking at the tears in your eyes, realizing that he needed to get you inside before you broke down in the car. “C’mon, let's go inside.” You bowed your head and nodded. 

“Okay.” You said softly. He helped you out of his car slowly, and walked you up to his apartment. Once there, you plopped on his couch, sobering up for the conversation you knew was going to happen. He walked in the room, a glass of water in hand. He handed it to you, sitting next to you. he waited a few moments before beginning the inevitable conversation.

“Y/n, why did you flinch?” He asked hesitantly. He didn't want to push you, but he was concerned and he wanted to know. So you told him. Every detail, every heartbreaking moment. The bruises, the scars, the hospital trips. Everything. The reports, the disbelief, the arrest, the divorce. Then the even worse parts. The escape, the stalking, the attack, the death. Every little thing. You could feel the tears falling down your face as you spoke about your ex-husband. 

Hotch sat as he watched the beautiful woman sitting in front of him break down. He didn't know any of this, none of it was in your file. He knew that Strauss had to know though, because you never would have been accepted without background checks and psych evals. 

His heart broke a little more every time you shared another detail. On one side it felt so nice to get it off your chest. On the other hand, it was weird opening up to Hotch like this. He was seeing so much more of you than you had ever allowed anyone since your husband. He sat in silence once you finished speaking. 

“Y/n. I'm so sorry. You never should have had to go through that.” And the tears came even faster, until they were silent sobs. Hotch, well he was more Aaron in that moment, brought you into his arms holding you tight, bringing you a comfort you hadn’t felt in a long time. “Shh, shh. It’s okay. I’m right here. It’s okay to cry.”He silently whispered into your hair. You looked up at him then, sighing softly at the beautiful man before you. 

“Thank you Aaron.” He loved the way his name sounded coming from your lips. But before he could tell you, he looked down to find you asleep in his arms. And that's how he stayed until morning. 

                       * * *

The next morning you awoke to a strange bed, with strange sheets, in a strange room. But one sniff and all you could smell was Hotch’s cologne. You soon recognized that there was a warm body behind your own, an arm wrapped around your middle. 

You almost didn't remember what happened last night, but once you did, you began to panic. What if he hated you? What if he was disgusted by you? He probably had just pitied you.  

He must have felt you shift, because he was waking up. His arm tightened around you, and he leaned up looking you in the eyes. He saw your panic and was alert rather quickly for someone who had just woken up. 

“What’s wrong?” He asked quickly, eyes scanning you frantically. 

“You must be disgusted with me.” You paused taking a deep breath. “I'm sorry Hotch. I ruined your night and then cried all over you with my pathetic life story. And you probably just pitied me. I'm sorry.” He shook his head. 

“Y/n, look at me.” You looked into his eyes. “I am and never will be disgusted by you. I am amazed by you. You are so strong and beautiful and you never deserved a thing that disgusting man did to you. I don’t pity you, not at all. All of this has just made me fall more in love with you than I already was.” You looked at him wide eyed.

“You love me?” He leaned a little closer.

“Of course I do. It's impossible not to.” You dared closer still as he moved a piece of hair from your face. The loving gesture warming your heart. 

“Thank you. For everything. I love you too Aaron.” And he sealed your lips. It was intimate and explosive at the same time. And in the most cliche way, fireworks exploded as you kissed him. 

You moved together passionately. Your noses bumped ever so slightly as he kissed you deeper than you had ever been kissed. He was an amazing kisser, to say the least. He broke away a moment later, smiling down at you. 

“Give me a chance to show you what real love is, what it's supposed to be.” You nodded.

“Of course Aaron.” And you kissed him again, sliding your hands around his neck into his hair. It was the happiest you had been in a very long time. 

So in hindsight, maybe getting drunk wasn’t such a bad idea after all. 

---------------

Thanks for reading! Requests are still open, so ask away! If i don't get to yours, I'm sorry!! If you would like an idea of what to request, here is my prompt list, and if you would like to read more of my work, here is my masterlist.

[indiee19]

There’s That Hotel Suite

Alex Turner x reader

Summary: Part two Of One For The Road. You and Alex go back to the hotel and have a long night.

warnings: smut, oral sex (both m! & f! receiving)

word count: 3042

A/N: I had a lot of fun writing this. AND did you guys see Katie’s new haircut, she looks absolutely stunning and her voice is so cute

✿✼:*ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑ ✿✼:*ﾟ:༅｡.｡༅:*･ﾟﾟ･⭑

You somehow managed to put your clothes on while Alex buttoned his shirt up again and did his pants back up. You climbed back into the front seat, situating yourself in the passenger seat, blushing when you fully realized that you were so close to the road, realizing that even though people were going fairly fast, that some might have seen you and Alex in the backseat.

Alex got out of the car and got into the drivers seat, starting the car, getting back on the road. "You alright, love?" he asked, speeding up.

"Y-yeah, just wondering how many people saw us, if some did," you said, playing with your fingers.

Alex laughed, turning into Berlin, going towards the hotel. "Well, then they can look how beautiful me girlfriend is," he laughed.

You chuckled and he continued driving, parking outside of the hotel. Once he stopped the car and took the keys out of the ignition, and got out, grabbing the shopping bags from the back. You back walked into the hotel, going to the elevator.

"Do you want some help with the bags?" you asked once you got to the floor your room was on.

"No, love. Just open the 'otel door for me," he replied. You nodded and the both of you walked to the room, seeing Matt once again.

"Hey, guys. Where have you two been?" Matt smirked.

"Well, I took me girlfriend out, like I said earlier," Alex responded.

"Yeah, I can tell you did, Al," Matt said. You didn't talk much, we're just ready to get into the room and take a hot shower and then lay down. Matt eventually went into his room, you and Alex doing the same.

Alex put the bags down near the suitcases and sat on the bed, taking off his boots.

You walked to the bathroom, taking off your clothes, turning on the shower. You stepped in and stood directly under the water, starting to wash your hair.

You were far too concerned with washing your hair that you didn't notice Alex come into the bathroom and take off his clothes, throwing them into a pile with your own.

It was only when he stepped into the shower that you noticed that he was in the bathroom.

"Alex, what are you doing?" you asked, washing out the shampoo from your hair.

"Taking a shower. Can I not do that?" he replied. You sighed and continued on washing your hair, putting in conditioner and washing it out, all the while Alex kept looking at you.

Then you reached for your body wash and your loofah, but Alex had beat you to it. He squirted some body wash on the loofah, putting the bottle away, and began to wash your body, starting with your shoulders, working his way down to your abdomen, then your legs.

He finished with your back, his arms wrapping around you to wash your chest, one of his hands purposely squeezing one of your breasts.

"What are you doing now, Alex?" you asked.

"Washing your body, love," he said, taking the shower head off and spraying your body down with it. Once he was sure all the soap was washed away, he took the shower head and sprayed it on your clit, knowing that you were still sensitive from earlier in the car.

You whimpered slightly, eyes shutting automatically, throwing your head back on his shoulder, the feeling driving you crazy.

Then, he stopped, placing the shower head back on the wall, turning off the water, getting out and grabbing a towel for you and him, wrapping his around his waist, handing you yours.

You grabbed the towel, wrapping it around your body, stepping out of the shower. "Al, baby, why'd you stop?" you asked, walking towards Alex, running your hands over his toned chest.

"Stop what, love?"  he replied, acting clueless, starring you down with his doe eyes. "You know what, Turner," you answered, kissing up his neck all the way to his defined jaw line. His hands grabbed your waist, hands exploring you chest, something that he's done at least one hundred times now, but somehow also made the ache between your legs grow prominent every time he did.

Alex stepped backwards, back hitting the wall, hands finding their way from your chest to your hair, tugging on it. You kissed down from his jaw to his abdomen, kissing his prominent v lines that the towel exposed. You removed the towel, throwing it on the ground.

You started to slowly stroke him, watching as he threw his head back against the wall, eyes closing. "Go on then, suck it, love," he grunted after you placed a kiss on his tip. You smirked before taking all of him into your mouth. 

Alex moaned, one of his hands finding its way back into your hair, tugging on it. He felt heavy against your tongue. Flattening your tongue to allow him to have more room, you hollowed your cheeks, bobbing your head back and forth on his length,  Alex moaned, pushing your head all the way down on his cock, holding you there, causing you to gag around him.

You looked up at him through your eye lashes, watching him as he threw his head back again, his hair falling into his beautiful face without all of the gel in it. You loved looking at him like this, loved watching him writhe for you, watching his face whenever you did this.

He finally opened his eyes, locking them with yours, his other hand coming down around your throat, thumb pressing down on it, almost massaging it. Alex's hips began to rock back and forth into your mouth, hitting the back of your throat, making you gag. You moaned around him, causing vibrations to be sent up his body. 

"God, love, I'm s-so close," Alex moaned, releasing his grip on your hair, allowing you to move off him to reply.

"Let go, Al," you said, immediately returning to him, bobbing your head, hollowing you cheeks once again, Alex's hips still bucking into your mouth. Then, he stilled his movements, grabbing your hair again, holding you there while he released into the back of your throat, causing you to swallow it. Once he was done, het let go of your neck and hair, pulling out of your mouth, helping you up off the floor.

"Love when you do that, baby," he said, kissing your neck, then tying his towel back around his waist. You walked over to the sink, getting your toothbrush and toothpaste, starting to brush your teeth, Alex doing the same.

He got done before you, leaving you alone in the bathroom to finish up brushing your teeth, putting on your nighttime skincare and to dry and brush your hair. You weren't done for about fourty-five minutes, sighing happily once you were done, walking out of the bathroom heading straight to the bed.

You saw alex laying on the bed, reading Pride And Predgiduce by Jane Austen, both of yours and Alex's favourite book. You smiled and went to the suitcase to get one of Alex's shirts and a pair of panties. He heard you unzip the zipper on the bag and looked up from his book at you, putting the book mark in and closing it, placing it on the nightstand.

He watched you get dressed, studying your every move. "Can I help you, Al?" you smirked, walking over to the bed, sitting down beside Alex.

"Yeah, actually you can, love," he said, grabbing you by the waist, situating you in his lap. He started kissing your neck. You were sure that he was going to remove your shirt to kiss further down your body, but he didn't do that. Instead, he told you to get up and lay down. You smiled with excitment, laying down, watching Alex get up and walk to the end of the bed, crawling over you, kissing up your thigh all the way to just below your core, lightly kissing your clothed clit.

"What is it that you needed me to help you with?" you asked, letting out a small whimper.

"I need you to explain why the fuck your wore these," he drawled, hooking his fingers under the waistband of your panties, pulling them down and throwing them into the floor. 

He gripped your thighs, pushing them apart so that he could begin leaving wet, open mouthed kisses on your clit. Your eyes automatically closed, hands going straight to his hair, pulling on it, eliciting a moan from him that sent vibrations up your body.

Alex moved down to your cunt, sticking his tongue inside you, beginning to fuck you with it. Hi nose kept rubbing up against your clit, his tongue moving in and out of you faster and faster. 

He removed his tongue from your cunt, replacing it with two of his long, slender fingers, pumping them in and out of you, raising his head up from your throbbing wet heat, making your eyes open. "A-Alex," you whimpered, the knot growing in your stomach very fast.

"Tell me what you want, love," he said, blowing on your core, sending shivers up your spine. 

"I-I want you," you breathed out, eyes closing again when he dipped his head back down too your heat, kissing your clit lazily. Your moans kept getting louder and louder, not caring at all what the person on the other side of the wall could hear. All you cared about was Alex between your legs, and how good he was making you feel at the moment.

Your hands kept pulling on his hair, legs spread as far apart as they could, Alex making you feel so good, just like he had done earlier on in the day and the previous night. You felt your orgasm approaching, moaning loudly once the waves of pleasure washed over you.

Alex kept kissing your clit, letting you ride out your high, his other hand moving from your thigh to your stomach after your hips started to jolt up to meet his face whenever he would move slightly to kiss your clit. 

After you came down from your high, Alex sat up, removing his fingers, making you whimper. He crawled over you to be face to face to you, kissing you passionately, bitting your bottom lip teasingly, demanding entrance. He slipped his tongue past your lips, exploring your mouth.  You could taste yourself on his tongue, hands still tugging on his hair, his hands either side of your head.

He pulled away, tugging on your, or should I say Alex's, shirt, lifting it above your head, throwing it to the floor. He didn't waste any time before dipping his head down to your breast, sucking one of your nipples into his mouth.

You threw your head back, moaning, hands gripping Alex's shoulders, nails digging into his skin. You subconsciously started to grind your hips into Alex's, feeling him hard through his underwear. 

He began kissing up your neck, stopping once he found your sweet spot and began sucking on it, your hands going back to his perfect hair that you loved so much. 

"God, Alex, please," you moaned, pulling him up to your face by his hair. 

"What, love?" he asked, knowing exactly what you would do when you needed him, when the ache between your legs was growing immensely. "I-I need you inside me," you begged, looking him directly in the eye. He laughed and sat up on his knees, straddling you.

He removed his boxers, his tip beginning to tease your folds, spreading the wetness around. 

"God, Alex, please, just stop teasing," you blurted out, watching his every move. Alex chuckled, pushing two fingers back inside you, watching as your eyes rolled back into your head. "You must be really desperate to 'ave me inside of you, your cunt's closing 'round nothing," he smirked after he took his fingers out of you. You practically begged him with your eyes, sighing with relief when he aligned his cock with your entrance.

He pushed his hips forward, slowly filling you up, feeling your walls squeeze his cock stopping once he was hilt deep, letting you adjust to his size, reveling in the feeling of your walls accomendating to his size.

Then, he slowly pulled almost all the way out of you before pushing back in, setting a pace at his liking. His head falling on your shoulder as he thrusted in and out of you.

You wrapped your legs around him, eyes shutting, nails digging into the skin on his shoulder. His hips repeatedly slammed into yours, sure to leave a bruise the next morning. One of his hands moved from beside your head to your clit to rub circles on it in sync with Alex's thrusts. 

Alex sat up, using his remaining arm to hold him up above you, pausing his movements, watching you open your eyes.  "W-what? Why'd you stop, baby?" you asked, already missing the sensation of his cock stretching out your walls.

"I want you to look at me, alright," he said. You nodded and he gave you that cocky, arrogant smile that you couldn't help but find sexy. Alex started to thrust in and out of you again, gradually going faster. 

You felt a knot in your stomach growing almost as fast as Alex's thrusts. "Alex, I'm c-close," you said, voice trailing off into a moan as Alex had chosen that particular moment to deliver a hard thrust, pushing down on your clit at the same time, sending you over the edge.

Your rode out your high, Alex not stopping, acting like nothing had happened, still going faster and faster in and out of you. You could tell that he was getting close as his thrusts had gotten sloppier, just barely holding on, wanting you to get there one last time.

The only sound that currently filled the room was your moans and the little grunts that Alex let out, his eyes never once leaving yours. Alex made sure to add more pressure on your clit, as well as going faster, knowing that you enjoyed his cock stroking your sensitive walls.

You felt your orgasm build up quicker than before, knowing that it wouldn't take much for you to go over the edge. "A-Alex, faster," you whimpered, watching him smirk, going faster. 

"Love, I'm close," Alex said, his thrusts getting sloppy. You managed to tell him that you were too, advising him to let go, Alex telling you the same. It took just one flick of your clit and Alex delivering a particularly hard thrust that hit the spongey spot that made you see stars behind your eyelids. 

Your eyes rolled back into your head, your orgasm washing over you, your walls contracting around Alex's cock, which triggered Alex's own release, stilling his movements, his hot release coating your walls, Alex collapsing on top of you.

He laid there until the both of you came down from your highs, pulling out of you. He  stood up and went to get a towel from the bathroom, coming back and cleaning you, and the bed, up, bringing it back to the bathroom once he was done, crawling in the bed beside you, wrapping his arms around you, nuzzling his head in your neck,  placing sloppy, wet kisses to it.

"Mm, I looove you," Alex said, closing his eyes, sighing.

"I love you too, Alexander," you replied, reaching over to turn off the light. Alex seemed to notice that and stopped you.

"What're you doing, love?" he asked, confused, sitting up.

"Turning off the light so we can go to bed. Why?" you said, confused as well. He got up and walked over to the shopping bags, bringing them over to the bed. 

"We're not going to bed just yet, you 'ave to try on everything you got today," he said, smiling widely. You laughed, mumbling an 'I love you.' You always found it so cute whenever he got excited about clothes that he had helped you pick out which is what he did most of the day. You got up, but before you could find something to try on, there was a knock at the door. You and Alex sighed, Alex putting on some boxers and sweat pants, you going to the bathroom to put on the robe.

You could only imagine who was at the door, walking back out to Alex, while he opened the door. It was Jamie at the door, Nick and Matt standing beside him. You immediately started blushing, hiding your face against Alex's neck.

"Now look, you two, we have nothing against you having sex, but we would appreciate  the both of you to keep the noise down, Katie and I were trying to sleep," Jamie explianed.

"Yeah, so was Breanna," Matt added. Nick also said that he and Matt were trying to pay a game of cards in Nick's room with Kelly.

"You heard us?" you asked, embarrassed. 

"I think the whole floor heard you," Matt laughed, Jamie and Nick laughing as well. You buried your face deeper in Alex's neck.

"Alright, next time we'll try to keep it down. Just don't be a dick next time," Alex responded as they walked back to their rooms. You walked over to the bed, looking in the bags, trying to distract yourself from the embarrassing moment that  had just happened.

"So, what should I try on first?" you asked Alex. He smirked and digged into the bag that had the lingerie, pulling out the black, lacey two piece. 

"You implying something after what we just did?" you joked. Alex’s facial expression saying everything. "Really, what about what Jamie and the rest of them said?" you asked. He chuckled.

"Who cares what they think? As long as I'm making you feel good, then I don't give a shit," he said, handing you the lingerie. You smiled and walked to the bathroom to change.

 You came out of the bathroom, Alex’s jaw dropping when he saw you. He grabbed by the waist, throwing you down on the bed, kissing your neck. "Remember, love, be as loud as you want," Alex drawled. You smirked as he kissed your neck, knowing that tonight was going to be much longer than you had initially thought.

[sei-hoe]

manager pt. 3

ok, it’s finally getting spicy in here y’all.  this is my favorite chapter so far, actually idk because pt. 2 and the fingers (drools), but there’s more of that in here heheh.  i hope you enjoy!!!

Reader x Tendou Satori feat. Ushijima & Semi

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

TW: gaslighting, manipulation, fingering, hand kink, sex, language, toxic men omg

WC: 2.8k

Summary: Practice has ended, do you go through with what you have planned with Tendou? (spoilers: yes you do 🥵)

The final whistle blew signaling the end of practice.  The team huddled together by the water cooler next to where you were sitting on the bench.  Feeling as though you should join them, you stood up and walked over to stand next to Tendou.  His body was close, heat radiating off his damp skin.  He smelled like sweat, it wasn’t a bad thing though.  As much as he fooled around during practice he also worked very hard, making himself one of the best middle blockers in the prefecture.  You looked up at him as Ushijima gave his closing remarks to the team, he looked down at you with a lazy half smile giving you instant butterflies as you quickly looked away, blushing.  

The huddle was dismissed, Tendou pulled you aside, lightly stroking your arm with his bandaged fingertips.  “I’m going to shower real quick.  Wait for me?  I’ll be like five minutes.”

You nodded and Tendou jogged in the direction of the locker room. As you started packing up your belongings you were getting lost in thought, did you want this? You could just leave.  You knew what was going to happen if he got you alone.  Casually flirting was one thing, but being alone with him in his car was another.  It’s not that you weren’t attracted to Tendou, but you weren’t sure if you wanted to do anything sexual with him yet.  You felt like throwing up, what had you gotten yourself into?  Before you could work through things in your head Ushijima cleared his throat to make his presence known.  

“I don’t know what your relationship with Tendou is…” he lied.  “But you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

You looked anywhere but his eyes, embarrassed as you stuttered out an answer. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” you lied back to him.  

He smiled as he walked to sit on the bench next to you, taking a drink from his water bottle.  “Then it looks like I know something you don’t.”  You looked at him, confused.  

“Tendou is planning on you giving him head tonight in his car.”  The captain spoke bluntly.  “He told me in great detail during practice.”

“Oh god.” You cradled your head in your hands.  What have you done?  

“Is that not something you want?”  He feigned concern.  You wanted to disappear, to be anywhere but there.  You didn’t want to talk about this with the guy you liked, the guy you had fantasies about.  He leaned closer, “because if it’s not, you shouldn’t have led him on like that.” 

Your eyes widened as your head whipped in his direction.  “What?”

He took a breath. 

“Did you know that we are ranked within the top eight teams in the whole country?”  Ushijima looked off towards the court while you looked at him, eyes glassy and focused.  “That’s something that takes rigorous practice and time...we don’t have social lives outside of each other.”  

“I don’t unders-”

“That’s where you come in.  You were oh so willing to be our little manager, coming in here all shy and clinging to Tendou.  Don’t you think he deserves it?  Don’t you think we deserve it?”

You were piecing together the puzzle.  Connecting the dots.  None of them had girlfriends, you never saw any of them talking to girls in the hallways during passing periods.  The team had a sleazy reputation, for an unknown reason minutes ago, but now you knew why.  

Ushijima scoffed when he saw your appalled expression. “Don’t act like you’re so surprised. Why else did you come here? To make friends?”  He leaned closer, his whispered breath hitting your ear, “we’ll be the best friends you ever had”.  

Maybe a part of you wanted this and knew it was coming.  You told yourself this morning that this was a bad idea but you came anyway.  You were still shocked at Ushijima’s behavior.  You now knew the look he had given you before practice began wasn’t anger, but arousal and maybe jealousy.  Then it hit you, just as much as you wanted Ushijima, he wanted you back.

“Sorry to embarrass you, but Tendou told me about your cute little crush.” He wasn’t sorry.  He loved the panicked look in your eyes, it made you more pliable.  You put your head back in your hands willing this moment away.  

“Ah ah”, he tutted, pulling your hands away.  “Look at me.”   His sweaty palms coerce your head to turn in his direction. You hesitantly lift your glistening eyes to his stern ones. 

“It’s okay, you’re okay.” He stares into your eyes convincing you that this is all okay.  He’s okay with your crush, he’s okay with your hesitance.  He leans in closer, face only inches away from yours, his thigh brushing against yours, a warm contrast to the freezing metal sticking to the back of your thighs.  

He whispered against your lips.  “Tell me to stop.  Tell me to stop if you don’t want this.”

He waited a beat and you remained silent as he pressed his lips against yours. His mouth was hot and wet.  Even though you knew it was coming it still took you by surprise.  Your wide eyes eventually fluttered shut as you leaned into the kiss, resting your hand on his hard chest, gripping his practice jersey.  His heart beats were steady, opposite to your sporadic ones.  You felt his tongue licking against your lips, attempting to gain access to your mouth.  You let him in, savoring the moment that your tongues intertwined in your mouth.  This wasn’t your first kiss by any means, but it was your first kiss with Ushijima and one that you will remember forever.  

The door to the gymnasium opened with the sound of a metal creaking against metal followed by footsteps and two voices.  Ushijima pulled away from the kiss slowly, strings of saliva still connecting his mouth to yours until he distanced himself enough for them to break.  

Looking into your eyes he spoke with a half smile, “You gonna be good for us?”

“Mhm.” You nodded hazily as Ushijima looked over your shoulder to investigate the disturbance.  Tendou and Semi walked over to the two of you, shit-eating grins on both faces.  Ushijima stood up and bridged the gap between you and the two new arrivals.  They began talking about you like you weren’t sitting there, mouth agape wondering what the fuck was going on. 

“Well, what do you think captain?” Tendou asked enthusiastically.  “Do I know how to pick ‘em or what?”

“She’ll be perfect...well done”.  Ushijima pondered.  

“That’s as much of a compliment you’re going to get from him.” Semi laughed.    

“You ready to go baby?” Tendou looked at you.  You nodded, quickly packing up your backpack and grabbing your phone.  Tendou laced his hand through your own as you walked to the parking lot.  He smelled good, his hair was still damp from his shower so it wasn’t sticking up straight like normal.  

The cool night air hit you as you exited the building making you wrap your jacket around yourself tighter.  You looked back at Ushijima and Semi who turned to the opposite side of the parking lot.  Ushijima held your gaze, the same look on his face as earlier, the one you couldn’t quite place.  

“Have fun!” Semi yelled across the parking lot.  Tendou chuckled and smiled down at you.  “We will.”  He answered to you instead.  

_____

Tendou’s car is pretty much exactly what you would picture.  Messy.  Fast food bags in the backseat, school papers everywhere, various volleyball paraphernalia and empty energy drink cans littering the floor.  

“Shit, sorry” he murmured as he brushed past you to throw everything that was occupying the passenger seat into the back. He gestured for you to get in.  Hesitantly you ducked down and slid into your seat.  Was this safe? Should you trust these practical strangers?  Your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the driver’s side door opening and Tendou’s legs making their way into the car followed by the rest of him.  He just seemed like one of those tall lanky guys that would drive the smallest beat up car.  

One of those tall lanky guys who had a long, thick cock to match. 

You looked out the window as you thought about what was about to happen, taking a deep breath you reflected. You wanted this, you repeat this to yourself.  What else did you have to do? You’re going to be involved in school activity, or rather a school activity is going to be involved in you.  Whatever.  You thought about what Ushijima said.  About how hard the team works, every single day.  Don’t you think we deserve it? His words resonate in your head.  You took a hesitant look at Tendou.  He was scrolling through his phone while his car warmed up.   Doesn’t he deserve it? 

You lean across the center console to put your head on his shoulder.  Tendou locked his phone, setting it on the dashboard, chuckling, “I have to hand it to ‘em, Ushi always knows just what to say.”

“You deserve it Tendou.” you looked up at him with innocent eyes. You don’t know where this sudden courage was coming from but you reached down to grab his hand that was resting on this thigh. Taking his pointer finger between your thumb and pointer finger you begin lightly rubbing, moving up and down his stupidly long finger.  His eyes went half-lidded and he quietly groaned as you made your way closer to his face.  Completely mesmerized by your soft ministrations he hooked his arms underneath yours and moved you onto his lap.  His erection was poking against your ass, your suspicions confirmed that his cock matched his body type.  

Whispering against his soft pink lips, “you like having your fingers played with?” 

He closed the gap between your mouths desperately.  His kiss was different from Ushijimas. Where he felt practiced and calm, Tendou’s kiss felt heated and needy.  His tongue instantly slipping into your mouth to lick everywhere he could reach; your cheek, teeth, tongue, lips; nothing was excluded.  He was rutting up onto your ass desperate for any kind of stimulation he could get.  You were still stroking his fingers as he brought both hands in front of your face.  

“Suck.” he pushed his pointer and middle fingers past your lips, you accepted them greedily, wetting them with the excessive amount of saliva your mouth has been producing.  Leaning back in his seat he watches you, mouth slightly agape, smiling.  He pushes further, too far, causing your throat to constrict around his digits. 

“You gonna gag on my cock like that too you little slut?”

You moan, unashamedly taking everything he would give you.  He continues to rub himself against you, grabbing your half exposed ass with his other hand feeling your lacy panties for the first time.  

“See you act all innocent, but you’ve been wearing this underneath your skirt all day?”  His hand caresses the fat of your ass and squeezes its way around to the front of your thigh until his fingers are playing with the hem of your panties on your upper leg. His bony fingers snake their way under your panties, moaning as he feels the evidence of your arousal, thick and slippery on his fingertips.  

“You don’t need any prep at all do you?” he condescends.  His fingers toy with your wet little hole, playing with the tight ring keeping him out of your cunt.  He pushes in with two fingers.  It didn’t matter how wet you were, it was a stretch, length and girth-wise.  You winced, biting down slightly on the fingers still penetrating your throat.  Pulling his fingers out of your mouth he reached down to release his aching cock from his sweats.  His other hand pulling your panties to the side you felt his cock brush against your folds.  

“Looks like we’re going to have to save that blow job for next time.” he mentions as he begins prodding your cunt with the tip of his painfully hard cock.  You wished you were able to get a good look at it, but you supposed you could save that for next time as well.  The stretch was burning as he slid into your drippy hole, inch by inch.  His head tipped back in pleasure, Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed. Seizing the opportunity, you latched onto his neck, sucking bruises onto his pale complexion as he began to bottom out.  

He pulled you off of his neck by your hair,  “don’t do that.” Embarrassed, your cheeks began to heat up, but a blush wasn’t given the opportunity to form as he began to move inside of you.  Your gummy walls grip every ridge and vein of his cock as he holds onto your hips.  

“Can’t be all marked up for games” he grunts, his eyes shut tightly, savoring the way you feel around him.  

“Sorry Tend-”

“Aww, getting all shy on me now, huh? Where’d the little girl who was sucking on my fingers go?” You buried your face in the crook of his neck as he wreaked havoc on your poor little pussy.  You could act as confident as you wanted, but this was still a crazy experience for you.  You opened your eyes to take in the scene in front of you.  Tendou’s neck was flushed, damp from sweat, veins jutting out ever so slightly.  You lick a cautious stripe up his most prominent vein.  He chuckles, “that’s ok baby, you can do that”. His hand is still weaved in your hair as he lets you have your fun.    

The car windows were fogging up as the sun was almost completely set.  “Fuck baby, you feel so good.”  You feel your pussy clenching down on him and a familiar feeling churning in the pit of your stomach.  He could feel it too, reaching down he toys with your clit.  Rubbing small circles around it, various mixtures of praise and degradation pouring from his mouth, egging you on.  

“You gonna cum for me? Huh?” he goads.  “I want you to.”  That’s all it took to push you over the edge.  His thumb stills, but applies pressure as you spasm and moan over his cock and fingers.  Head now heavy with sleep you rest your head on his warm shoulder.  

“I don’t think so.” he commands, shaking his head and  pulling you upright by the hand still attached to your hair.  “You’re gonna watch me ruin this pussy.” 

His humping was getting sloppy and uncontrolled and you began to get overstimulated. 

 “You on the pill?”  You nod, eyes glued to his.  “Thank fuck,” several hurried thrusts later, his thrusting stilled and he was spilling himself inside of you.  

 “Fuuuckkk,” he moaned, still holding your head in place ensuring that you were watching.  You felt so full, his thick, sticky seed finding a nice home inside of you.  He took a moment to catch his breath, releasing your hair from his sweaty palm, letting his head fall back against the headrest.  He grabs his phone from the dashboard, to snap a quick picture of your abused cunt before you could protest. 

“For later,” he murmurs, staring at the screen illuminating his face.    

He pulled out and tucked himself back into his sweats.  You felt so empty all of a sudden, your pussy still molded to the shape of him.  He slid your panties back in place.

“We wouldn’t want any to slip out,” he smiled lazily at you.  

___

The drive home was a quiet one.  The radio was playing quietly in the background and the sun had completely set at this point.  The only light was coming from the headlights in oncoming traffic.  You directed him whenever he had to make a turn, but otherwise neither of you said a word. He had his hand resting on your thigh, which was reassuring you suppose.  Maybe he was just tired after cumming.  You had arrived in front of your house in record time; Tendou was a bit of a reckless driver.  You unbuckle your seatbelt and reach for your backpack, not expecting another interaction.  But he got out of the car to walk around to open your door, something you hadn’t expected. 

Getting out of the car and walking towards your front door you mutter, “thanks Tendou, I’ll...uh...see you tomorrow I guess.” 

“Hey, come here,” he spoke, pulling your arm towards him.  You crash into his chest.  Raising a finger to your chin, he lifts it.  “You were everything I needed you to be today.” He kisses you on the lips then takes a step back. 

“Also I kinda love knowing that you’re keeping my cum warm for me in there,” he ran his hand up your lower abdomen. Tendou released you from his hold and circled back around the car.  You stood there once again, mouth agape, face beet red. 

“See you tomorrow manager.” 

[babytaes]

the grim reaper(my home)

summary:  Everyone depicts the Grim Reaper as a bad character, but he didn't kill you. It's just a trip to the afterlife, and he's actually being helpful by walking you there. Consider what it would be like if you had to travel alone. As she battles through life, Jay meets an unexpected figure, yet she doesn't seem to be terrified of him when he comes knocking on her door, why?

paring: jay x female reader

genre: angst, slight fluff

word count: 6k

warnings: profanity, ummmm rock chic jay.

𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖗𝖆𝖈𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖙𝖗𝖆𝖎𝖙𝖘: click me before reading!

➳ part of the drunk & dazed series

☆ ҉ ◢▅◣

I wish that everyone knew how their lives ended. It's essentially a game of guessing what will happen to you. Don't even get me started on the subject of Heaven and Hell. You've heard it all, the misery and the heinous methods in which people go out.

But why did death come knocking on the door at such an early age? You'll never know why they chose this age.

You didn't have your entire life laid out for you, nah, what a waste. Seeing it, however, was strange.

Well, there's him, or whatever entity they're referring to. The Grim Reaper.

You didn't notice him until things began to go wrong for you. A black object flashed in and out all of a sudden.

It was more predictable than unexpected.

Usually you would see him after work but I guess he had other plans. Despite your exhaustion, you flopped down on the couch and pulled out your phone to conduct an online search.

You giggled as you aimlessly scrolled through your phone and eventually peeked up to see a dark figure seated across from you.

As you laid your phone down and peered at the figure, you said, "So he finally wants to show his face."

“Don't tell me you can see me right now?” he cocks his head and looks about before returning to you.

“Well, I've only seen glimpses of you for the previous few weeks, but now I'm seeing you in all your glory.”

“Shit” As he hurriedly shot back into the dark shadows behind him, he widened his eyes.

“Wait a minute, don't leave.”

He was still there, hidden from view. He wasn't ready to leave yet. As you moved over to the door, you rolled your eyes at your phone and grabbed your apron. As you put your shoes back on, you exclaim and awkwardly wave your hand in the air before closing the door.

“You better be here when I get back, and keep in mind that we have business to discuss."

He rolled his eyes at your strange conduct as he smiled gently before vanishing back into the dark abyss, now entirely gone from your home.

---

“So Jay, what's on the agenda in Reaper business?” He noticed his old acquaintance gleaming at him as he peered up from his chair.

“Well, Jake, the previous several weeks have been a complete nightmare. They paired me up with this tough guy who was fighting for his life. As he continued, he rolled his eyes.

“It's been quite tranquil since they reassigned me to another case, but something strange happened today. I inadvertently made myself obvious to her, but she was unconcerned.

“Weird.” Jake shook his head and cocked his head to the side as he called out to him.

“So, two pieces of information I just got: it's a girl, and she appears to be somewhat odd. When you get back, I'd like to hear more about this."

As you put on a strange expression, he smiled at the boy as he spoke about jobs he had recently gone on.

“Yeah, there's something odd about it,” 

“I also—wait a minute, Jay, I recognize that look.” Jake pauses in his speech for a moment as he approaches you and analyzes your body.

“Please, dude, take a step back.”

He hears on the intercom times for a meeting today for all Reapers to attend, and he laughs at you. Jake makes a peace sign as he hits the door's slab and vanishes from view.

Sitting back in your chair, you raise your feet and begin to formulate a strategy.

“What am I doing here? I'm a doer. Let me just return to her and have that conversation she requested.”

He steps into form and vanishes back to the house he used to be in, softly cheering to himself.

Surprisingly, he can hear your voice but not yet see you, so he emerges from the shadows and takes a stroll through your home, taking in your life.

He saw photos of dogs and people he assumed were family and friends, as well as one thing that attracted his attention.

As he approaches it, he enters a familiar room and sighs as he makes his way to the gleaming object. It was a bracelet with scribing on it of some type.

When he reaches out to pick it up, he feels a searing feeling and drops it swiftly, muttering a torrent of curse words.

“What the hell was that?” When he looks closely, he notices symbols that resemble a cross.

“Fuckin Christ,” 

“Do all Reapers barge into your house and search through their belongings on the spur of the moment, or is mine defective?”

Jay, who has jumped up in panic, apologizes by turning around and raising his hands. When he glances up, he notices you resting on the door frame, arms folded, staring at him.

“Well, let's just put this inconvenience behind us and have that conversation you wanted to have, hmm?”

“All right, let's go into the living room, and by the way, your style is really fashionable. I had no idea you people dressed up so well to steal souls. Are there any employment openings?”

As he comes to a halt in his tracks, you turn your head to face him and stare at his unmoving form.

“Hellooo, please don't tell me they gave me a defective one. Jeez”

For a brief moment, everything came to a halt as Jay regained his bearings. "That was strange. Why am I blanking out because she's so strange?”

With a shake of his head, he smiles at you and walks into the living room, where he sits across from you, still perplexed as to who and what you are.

It wasn’t human-like.

“Thank you, no one seemed to realize that the original reaper gear wasn't cutting it for me. Also, I'm presuming you're a young adult, so you know what I'm talking about.”

You pull closer to him, laughing at his words, and lay your elbows on your legs, intently listening to him.

“So Grandma was right, you guys do exist. Tell me more; you know I don't appear to have much time left, so give me your answers.”

He let out a chuckle as he hastily covered his mouth, daring not to be affected by the earth.

He'd been doing this work for quite some time and appeared to be quite confident in himself and his abilities.

But there was something about you that made him feel comfortable and at ease, and he didn't feel like he had to hide, very apparent when a patient screamed at him or when they insisted death hadn't arrived yet.

It was strange, but it was great not to have to put on a show. Outside of the Reaper, he almost forgot who he was for a moment.

Maybe this one could get to know you, the cool yet elegant Jay. Not the dark version of himself. Even if his ultimate goal is to accompany you to the hereafter.

Maybe, just maybe, in that slim possibility, he'll take advantage of this opportunity to learn more about this person and why they're so interested in you.

---

“Before we jump right into this game, I have a question for you: why aren't you terrified of me?” As he stared at your blank expression, he spat out.

“Well, as I already stated, my grandma was a firm believer in the unknown. Even though she is no longer with us, she has taught me a great deal about the supernatural and unknown.”

You got up and walked over to the kitchen, motioning for him to follow you before opening the refrigerator and taking some fresh fruit out.

Jay promptly stood up and walked over to the chair, where he sat, watching your every move as you leapt onto the counter and turned to face him, before placing a mango slice into your mouth.

“All right, my turn, what's your name and what's my illness?”

Jay coughed and sat up straight as he removed a piece of paper from his pocket and read it loudly before setting it down.

“Y/N Y/L/N, you've been diagnosed with Heart Disease, and things aren't looking well for you. I know you haven't been to the doctor in a while, which is also perplexing. And my name is Jay.”

You place the fruit down next to you and cross your legs before responding to his comment, shaking your head up and down.

“Well, that's true; it runs in the family, but I'm not concerned because time is never on our side, and we all have an expiry date, which I believe is approaching soon. Right?”

Jay knew you just had one week left, but he didn't want to break your cheerful mood, so he waited.

“Well, I can't tell you when you'll die just yet, but your time is running out. I'm sure it's terrifying, but-”

Before concealing your lips, you chuckle loudly. Jay snickered as he looked up at you.

“Man, you're such a strange person; how do you manage to be so confident and direct? I'm becoming a little afraid, and I'm the Grim Reaper.” You leap from the countertop and walk over to him.

You cocked your head to the side and placed your hands on his face, pushing your face towards him. As you smile, his face flushes, and as he pulls away from you, he coughs before moving his hand to encourage you to continue.

“You have nice eyes, you know. Okay, now I'll tell you my story. Instead of countless questions, I believe it would be simpler.”

He just nods his head and lets you continue talking about your life.

---

As we all crossed the bridge into the next city over, you glanced out the window at the water. You'd always enjoyed being near water. It brought up memories of trips you and your grandparents took together.

When you arrived at your location, you grabbed your suitcase and exited the vehicle, leaving your parents behind.

“Are you sure you don't want to join us?” As they drove out of the parking lot and onto their vacation, you shook your head and waved farewell to them.

Even though you were 17, you still enjoyed going to your grandparents' house because it provided a sense of security that you didn't have at home. So you'd take them in a heartbeat.

Looking up, you notice Pops standing at the door, arms outstretched, waiting for you.

“There is my favorite grandchild.”

“Gramps, I'm your only grandchild,” you said, laughing as you took him in your arms and grinned as you stepped into the house.

“Oh, that's right.” He takes your stuff and starts to take it to your allotted room while laughing together. “Your Grams is out back,” he shouts as he approaches the top.

‘Thanks” When you walk out to the backyard, you'll find her sitting in her iconic chair, surrounded by books, muttering to herself. She puts the book down and leans in to hug you as she stands up.

“Aww, I've missed you so much. There's just so much you can talk about with your grandfather before he falls asleep. Please have a seat; we have a lot to discuss."

There's a sensation you've been missing, a sense of belonging to a place you once called home. They were the only ones who could supply you with a sense of safety and security, and you couldn't get enough of it.

“We talked about witches and wizards the last time we were here. Now we're dealing with Reapers, or more precisely Grim.”

When she stated those two words, your eyes lit up; it was a favorite topic of yours that she brought up frequently, but now you had more time to delve deeper.

“Let's get started; we've got a lot of ground to cover. Allow us to see The Unknown by opening our eyes. “Are you wearing your bracelet?”

“I never take it off,” you say. You shook your right arm and returned your hand to hers, shaking your head.

As you were swept away in a dark mist together, you grinned and took her hands in yours. Even though they appear to be ordinary, decent folks, there is something you should know about my grandparents. They are one of many people who have gained entrance to the supernatural realm, a place where anything is possible.

You tried to inform your parents, but they were skeptical of fairy tales. They tried to prevent you from seeing them, claiming that "they will stunt my growth," which is ridiculous because I've learnt more from my grandparents than from my parents.

Regardless of how hard they tried to stop you, you always managed to find your way back to them. We were linked, and nothing could stop you until YOU chose to let it. That day, however, never came.

You found yourself in a boat, holding your grandmother's hand, as it carried you across a vast chasm and into town. You come upon another boat that appears to be some kind of creature with a scythe. As he traveled down the river opposite you, strands of golden hair protruded from beneath his hood.

“Wait, don't tell me that person on the river was you now that I think about it?”

“I think it was, man, that was a long time ago,” Jay laughed and shook his head. Also, I had no idea you had access to that world?”

“Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get back to the story.” As you spoke, he grinned.

“All right, honey, let's go; we can't linger for too long.” You both stepped off the boat and walked into town, taking in the sights. As you climbed the slope, merchants' stands and buildings crept up on you. It was weird to see individuals of all kinds here, going about their daily lives in the same way that those on the surface did.

You see vampires, werewolves, angels, and even ghouls all lingering together and with one another as you walk side by side with your grams. Despite the fact that they all had their own lives to live, they could join together to gather supplies and meals.

What a wonderful thing

You both entered a familiar building, and your grandma greeted the old man behind the counter.

“Oh, my favorite customers. What brings you down here and how is life above the surface? Another book you have in mind.”

Your Grams smiled as she let go of your hand and approached the man at the front of the bookstore, “you always know Melvin.”

As they conversed, you strolled through the big store on your way to the second floor. Before reaching the top, you yell out to Melvin.

“I'm hoping you'll let me take one.”

“Anything for my sweet Y/N, go ahead and look, there's a new one up there.” You hurried up the steps and across to the Book Wall, grinning ear to ear. From baby dragons to spell books, there was something for everyone. Anything you can imagine Melvin’s shop had it all.

When you took one off the shelf, you were greeted by a young boy who stood next to you. You couldn't tell if he was your age since down here, time moves at a different pace than it does on the surface. Still he looked quite young.

It was pleasant to see the creatures up close, even if you had never met them before. You stepped away from him, afraid of his reaction, and made your way to the chair sections. You sat down and picked up a book titled "The Origins of Reapers."

“How did you get here? I've never seen a girl human down here before.” You looked up from your book to see the boy you'd seen previously, frightened that he'd do something. You closed your eyes and shook your bracelet in front of his face.

As he waited for you to settle down, he laughed and sat next to you.

“I'm not going to harm you; all I wanted to do was ask a question. My name is Jake, what is yours?”

“My name is Y/N, and my grandparents have access to the world, so I tag along occasionally, may I inquire what you are?” you said slowly as you sat up straight.

He shifted in his seat and grinned, his face more dog-like. How could you be afraid of him?

“Well, don't be afraid of me since I'm a Grim Reaper in Training. I'm fairly innocuous. It's nice to see a human down here; normally, we only see humans when it's their time.”

You hear your grandmother calling from downstairs before he can continue.

“Coming”

You return his gaze and apologize as you rise, book in hand, and make your way to the stairwell.

“It was a pleasure to meet such a lovely human; please pay a visit to the Reaper Realm when you return. Simply request Jake.” He gave you a wave before yelling at Melvin.

“I'm leaving Melvin; my book is on your desk up here.”

As you return your attention to Jake, you hear Melvin's remark, but he vanishes into thin air as you descend the steps. Your grandmother expresses her gratitude to Melvin for the choice and exits through the front door.

“Are you all set to depart, sweetie?” With a shake of your head, you bid Melvin farewell as you close the door and return to the boat, where you sit down and take your gram's hand in yours.

"Let's go home," says your grandmother.

---

“So yeah, I've been traveling there with them ever since they introduced me to your world.” You came to a halt in the middle of your walk and coughed, wiping a tear from your cheek.

“My grandparents died a few years ago, and I haven't been back in a long time because I used to only go with them. It was doubly difficult because they both died on the same day, and she was telling me that she could see him on that day. I'm hoping she meant the Reaper, because they were the last thing to see them leave.”

You grabbed his arms on the spur of the moment and violently shook them.

“I know you must have records someplace, but could you please assist me in locating them as part of my dying wish? At the very least, let me see where they went; I need to know if they're okay.”

So this was the true you, the one in desperate need of a reconnection with the Gone. You received your response and devised a plan.

“Hey, don't worry... I'll see what I can do.  But there's no guarantee. I wasn't on the case at the time, so I'll have to do some digging, but I'll try.  “Can you tell me their names?”

Wiping tears from your eyes, you rose from your chair and dashed to your room, calling him over.

When you opened a box from under your bed, there were wonderful memories from you and your grandparents inside. You attempted to obtain more, but everything was returned to the Underworld, leaving you with only this.

Jay knelt down and picked up a photograph of you and them. They were regulars, and he had seen them around town. Hopefully, in the short time she had left, you could help her.

“Elizabeth and Albert Marvin were their names. I'm not sure if there's anything else I can do to assist you, but please do your best." As you hurriedly covered your mouth with your palm, a harsh cough came from your throat, and your chest began to throb as you placed your hand on your heart.

It was obvious that time was not on your side. You rise off the ground and walk over to Jay, looking up at him. You wrapped your arms around his frigid body, engulfing him in a hug.

Jay stood there awkwardly with his arms down as he gently moved you off and returned to the couch area.

“Like I said, there's no guarantee that I'll find them, and who knows, they could not even be alive. But I’ll try my best. It was a pleasure to speak with you, but I must depart because we are running out of time.”

He gave you a beeper before vanishing.

“Please page me on here if you need to reach me; I'll do my best to respond. You look after yourself.” 

You waved farewell as he left your house and returned to his, where he continued his exhaustive investigation.

He didn't want to let you down because he felt such a responsibility to you. He would complete whatever task he was given. He would do anything for you if he could see that smile on your face.

“Let's get down to business.”

---

 “Jay...Jay wake up” As you awoke slowly from your arms, you felt a push on your shoulder. As your eyes adjusted to the bright light, it took some time to figure out who was interrupting you.

“W-What exactly is it, Jake?” You and Jake have been coming in every day for the past five days, attempting to find a solution to your problem. Jake may have discovered something despite the difficulties.

“So, I just had an epiphany,  last time I saw Y/N she was at Melvin bookstore, so let's see if he knows anything about them.” You leapt from your chair and snatched a jacket as you ushered Jake out the door and toward Melvin.

For you and y/n, things were starting to look up.

Maybe you were going to do something good for one of your friends souls.

As you and Jake approached Melvin's business, you inhaled deeply and opened the door, eager to hear what he had to say to you.

Melvin's attention was drawn to the bell sound, and he looked up from his spectacles, saying, "Hey youngsters, what brings you here?"

“Well, we had a question for you regarding an old friend of yours, does Elizabeth Marvin ring a bell?” He pulled a photograph from his back pocket and presented it to him; his face darkened as he held the photograph in his hands and smiled broadly at it.

“Oh, my favorite customers. I don't have much information, but the last time they were in here, they were in a hurry and seemed concerned. “We have to make the crossing,” Elizabeth kept emphasizing.

As you and Jake turned to each other, you both had a frightened expression on your faces.

“Don't tell me they took the Crossing, shit,” says Jay You turned around and proceeded towards the door, thanking Melvin, while Jake grinned and waved farewell before heading out the door. He discovered you slumped against the wall, head down, groaning.

“Jay, please don't thin-”

“Keep your mouth shut Jake, because you know no one survives the Crossing without a guide. There are just too many wicked spirits out there, and you and I both know that getting to the finish is impossible. Jay growled as he stood up and kicked whatever was closest to him.

“Ugh, why did I do that?” 

Jake approached his friend and patted his back, unsure of how he would react. It was a small gesture. He knew it was impossible, but he didn't want his best friend to know. They still needed to be encouraged.

“I'm going back to headquarters to see what else we can find; meet me back there, okay?” As he watched Jake go from his sight, Jay nodded and thanked him for his assistance.

He didn't know what else to do, so he had to break the dreadful news to you. It turned out to be for the best. He was good at one thing: conveying bad information to others. What an ironic Reaper. With a shake of your head, you prepared to go to Y/N's flat.

Here goes nothing.

Jay was gone in a flash of dust and now stood in a familiar location, squinting as everything appeared to be different. Jay spotted clothes strewn on the floor, dishes scattered in the sink, and the bathroom's random lights flashing.

He was so preoccupied with the status of the house that he didn't see that your time was slowly eating away at you, that you were holed up under blankets in the bedroom with chest discomfort and dizziness that came and went.

Your once-young body was losing its ability to hold on to life. As you coughed loudly and grinned as you motioned for him to come over to you, you looked up and noticed him standing in the doorway.

You quietly sighed as you slowly climbed up, your hand resting on your chest.

‘So-so any news captain. “I need something to take my mind off the pain.”

As he prepared his message, Jay didn't make eye contact with you as he lifted your blanket over your body and patted it down. This felt different than relaying bad news as the “BIG AND BAD GRIM REAPER” As he was going to burst your bubble, something inside ached. What do people refer to it as? Sadness.

What exactly did you do to him?

“So, Y/N, please wait until I finish before you speak.” He took a big breath and continued, his lips curling in. “We've at a dead end; Jake and I spoke with Melvin, who indicated they were discussing the "Crossing," which in Grim Reaper lingo means "no go." That's a place where no one ever returns; it's only conceivable if you have a guide, which I'm not sure they did. They could be lost or worse, stolen by a spirit, for all I know. I-, I'm sorry, but I'm not sure.”

He heard your voice and looked down, avoiding eye contact. "It's okay Jay,"   He jerked up and glanced at your frail form, perplexed and terrified. In the light of your candle, he could see better, but death was creeping up on him. He just had a day  before he had to take you. He wasn't pleased with the situation or with you.

“It was a big ask, but I'm happy you and Jake did your hardest,” you said, a tear streaming down your cheek. That's all I requested, and despite the fact that it didn't work out, I liked the gesture, so thank you.”

“Thanks for doing business with you,” you said with a grin on your face as you extended your hand to him. As you looked him in the eyes, he took your weak hands in his and gently shook them.

“What, do I have something on my face? I don't want to appear unkempt.” You laughed and reached for your hands to be unlatched from his grip. Rather than releasing go, he drew you closer to him and kissed your gentle lips.

As you released each other, he wasn't thinking; in reality, he was panicked.

“Um- I don’t know what that is but I have to go. Sorry, I'll pick you up tomorrow-” “Please don't go,” you said as you took a big breath and clutched his hand. If I'm being honest, I'm afraid, and I could use some companionship before I take my final breath.”

“Sleep well y/n, we have a long walk tomorrow,” he said as he sat down on the bed and took your hand in his again before turning off the lamp. When you felt a squeeze in your palm, you smiled and laid over, allowing sleep to take control.

---

You were startled awake by Jay, who sat across from you, peering at the clock, as though intently staring at it.

You scooted up and waved a hand in front of his face to grab his attention, but he continued to stare at the clock.

“You have a few hours left, you know? Sorry, I was just doing some math." He turned to face you as you stumbled out of bed, grasping the bedside table before lifting yourself up like a drunk woman.

“Oh, well, it appears that my body is shutting down. Fun.” As you pushed him out of the room, you gave him a thumbs up.

“Let me get dressed; I want to look my best for when I DIE!” Jay was startled and furrowed his brows as he walked slowly to his seat, pondering why this generation was so eager to die.

You put on a cute hoodie your grandmother gave you and threw on some pants. As you fumbled about for shoes, you heard Jay ask a question from the other side of the door that made you pause.

'Are you going to call your parents or someone else?'

When you think back on your life, you were in theirs, but not much of them were in yours, which made you resentful of them. You didn't dislike them; you just preferred to spend your time and energy with people who made you feel at ease.

Your grandparents made you feel that way and you didn't have time to waste on people who you could care less about.

“I guess I'll send a text over.” Huffing, you took out your phone and entered your message into an already-created group chat.

"Hey guys, I'm not feeling well, could you come tomorrow?" you say.

(read 10:25 a.m.)

(typing bubbles)

(bubbles disappears)

Mom: This is such a last-minute thing, but your father and I are leaving tomorrow for a business trip that will last a week. Maybe when we come back. I'll send Sylvia over because I gave her the day off. “Be careful.”

Throwing your phone you yelled aggressively as you looked around your space. Even while you're dying, they don't give a damn about you. What is fucking family anymore?  You took one final look at your bed before stepping out and calling Jay, as if you didn't care any longer.

“Hey you good, I heard screaming but didn't want to interrupt if you were nude or something,” he said, looking up at your hesitant face. As you passed him on your way to the door, a smile crept across your lips.

“Oh shut up, come on, I got a request.”

Jay got up and walked past you as you turned to see your whole life stored away in a small space. Even if you didn't know where Jay would lead you, you had a feeling it would be better, right?

“Goodbye” As you walked slowly to your car in the parking lot, you grabbed Jay's hand in yours as you closed the door. As you held his hand even more, you felt it tense up.

“Hey what was that for?”

“You whine a lot, don't you? Come on, I've got a few more dying wishes before you take me and send me off somewhere, let's fucking go.”

He saw you let go of your hand as you walked to the opposite side of your car, hopped in, and turned on the ignition.

“Are you sure you're up for this? I don't want you passing out on me.”

Jay rushed next to you as he reached for your shoulder as a cough steadily burst from your throat, causing you to grasp your chest in anguish. You shook your head and gave your body a couple shakes as you waved your hand at him.

“I'm good, you know the exact time, so give me a heads up whenever I'm close.” “Anyway, less about my condition and more on the fun we're about to have.”

You put your foot on the brake and drove out the parking lot and on your way to the boardwalk that was a good distance away.

“Sit back, it'll be around 2 hours before we get to my favorite spot.”

Jay offered you a troubled expression as he laid his head on the window, pondering the time you had left while gazing out the window.

*8 hours left, you had eight hours left*

---

Coming up over the infamous hill, you notice the blue seas and immediately begin to brighten up as you repeatedly punch Jay in the arm.

“Jay... Jay... JAYYYY loook were here,” He grabbed your hand and swung it the other way before slowly turning to face you before your final punch. Don't bother Reapers while they're asleep; they don't get enough sleep as it is, and constantly bringing souls is exhausting.

“Please stopp I heard you the first five fucking times.” As he turned back to face the water, he rolled his eys and chuckled a little. The way the waves drenched the salty surface back and forth was more than simply water; it was an artwork.

Even though this might be your last moments on earth, you were glad you found someone to spend them with as you saw Jay's look. You put your hand on his shoulder and signaled for you to depart.

He stepped out of the car, mesmerized by the quiet waters, and walked over to your side, his gaze never leaving the sea.

“It's strange, I've seen my days of oceans before, and I've probably gone to all of them many times, but this one feels different. For a little moment, I forgot I wasn't human. Oh that remind me”

Jay rotated in a circle as he appeared to you dressed in more fashionable attire to placate the human crowd. He clutched your arm as he lost his footing for a second, then raced forward towards the boardwalk, thanking you.

“Hurry up, I didn't transform into a normal male for nothing, I want to see what you folk do up here.” He sneaked a glimpse at you as you laughed heartily at him, and before he knew it, you were running past him, his hand in yours, and on your way to the boardwalk's many attractions.

Spilled ice cream cups, lost money from arcade games, the sides of yours and his faces scorching from a lack of sunscreen, and not to mention the continual brushing of each other's hands were all part of the day. You took Jay's hand as the crowds filtered off the boardwalk and brought him to one of your favorite areas, the sand. As you approach the ocean now that the sun has lowered somewhat, it feels chilly.

As you stand in the cool ocean, letting the waves wash over your feet and taking a deep breath, attempting to relax, you feel a touch on your back. When you open your eyes, you notice Jay standing next to you, his gaze fixed on you. You laughed and placed your head on his shoulder; he didn't flinch or react this time.

He'd become accustomed to it and even loved it.

“How much time do we have left? Will I miss the sunset? Please say no.” You drooped your lips and glanced towards him, anxiously awaiting his response.

“Don't worry, you'll have time,” he said, taking your hand in his and pulling you down further away from the water as you both watched at the ball of light travelling toward the horizon.

The dazzling and flaming sun began to be swallowed by the sky as nightfall approached. The sky suddenly fills with beautiful, rich colors ranging from soothing blues to powerful reds and bright oranges, and finally thin, melancholy clouds.

Jay drew you closer, which surprised you, but you didn't mind because it was getting colder and fewer people were leaving the beach, leaving fragments of people strewn about. Jay drew your attention to himself before relaying the news to you.

Allow me to speak before I say what I truly need to say; these past three weeks have been incredible and eye-opening. I had no idea there were individuals out there that battled and were as brave as you. I understand how difficult it must be to go through all of these changes, but-”

A tear trickled down your face as you coughed, interrupting his speech.

*10 minutes left*

“Oh don’t start crying,” “All I wanted to say is thank you for allowing me to experience something different than my typical routine,” you joked as you pushed his chest. I don't get out very often, but tonight was enjoyable; I hope it distracted you from your worries.”

As you clasped your chest and pulled Jay out of worry, a fast cough attack hit your system.

*5 minutes left*

“I-i woul-l-d love to talk more about our fond memories but my chest is hurting and I think you need to get to the point.” You unbunched his shirt from your fist and let him continue, smiling despite your pain.

He embraced you in his arms because he was afraid he wouldn't have enough time to relay everything.

“Fuck it” 

He drew you in and kissed you again, this time more passionately than before. Your heart skipped a beat as heat rose from your stomach to your chest, and you weren't sure if it was a legitimate emotion or your condition was approaching. As you drew him closer to you, flinging your arms around his neck and smiling, the fragrance of salty sea water filled your nostrils. This moment, the taste of him… It calmed your racing thoughts and made you feel as if your heart was slowing down.

*1 minute left*

As you backed away from his kiss, your eyesight faded in and out, and as you looked about, your vision in the inner corners of your eyes started to go black. It was occurring, and your time was running out. You staggered into Jay's arms as he spoke into your ear, looking back at him.

“See you on the other side Y/N”

---

When you first awoke, you peered around at the dark waters, then looked up to see the real Jay. His Scythe's blade gleamed in the moonlight, and his velvet hood blew in the breeze. Not turning around you heard his voice, distinctly differently than before.

“Get ready, we're closing in on our dock.”

You slowly stood up and felt a prickling sensation on your wrist as you noticed your bracelet was lightly shining, something it had never done before. Perhaps it was the moonlight reflecting off of it.

You observed three figures standing at the dock through the mist and tried to figure out who they were. You didn't realize it until you got off the boat.

“Gramps and Gram, what?” Your voice trembled as tears streamed down your cheeks. You couldn’t believe what you were seeing.

“Is this a joke,” As you grabbed them in a deep hug, a hand pushed you closer to them.

“We missed you pumpkin.” You turned around and went towards the dark figure, making sure not to hit his Scythe as you drew Jay into a hug as you got snot on his coat.

“I thought you said you couldn't find them,” you remarked. “I had given up hope.” His face was obscured by a black gloom, so you couldn't see him.

“Um, sorry but could you change back to your normal self, just this once.” Jay reappeared in his usual body, simply regular old Jay, in a split second.

“I apologize for forgetting about that, but please don't thank me. It was all my pal Jake over there.” You turned around and raced over to Jake, hugging him and almost shoving him off the dock.

“Thank you thank you so much, I owe you one.” “Don't worry about it,” he said as he stepped back.

After letting go of him, you returned to the location where your grandparents were standing and took their hands in yours. It was time for you to leave, and all you had to do was walk away.

As tears streamed down your cheeks, you came to a halt and turned around to face him. It didn't take long for you to run back into his arms.

“I'm not usually this way, but I'm glad I found someone I can call a friend.” Jay, I hope we run across each other. Thank you for everything; I just wanted to let you know that your efforts are appreciated.”

You let him go and wave to him after pulling him into a goodbye kiss. You hear him calling out to you.

“I think I like you Y/N?”

“Well, I think we should talk about that the next time I see you.” You turn back and continue on your journey, giggling at his childish antics as you fade into the darkness.

As he and Jake hopped back into the boat to return home, Jay's smile never faded.

“I told you so”

“Oh shut it.”

He'd finally found that thing you'd always talked about, that haven where you felt so comfortable that the rest of the world couldn't possibly come crashing down around you. He was overjoyed to have discovered his HOME and vowed to do everything in his power to ensure he never lost it.

“See you soon Y/N.”

☆ ҉ ◢▅◣

➳ Navigate to the Maze

[slashersgostabbystabstab]

Life in the Shadows (Michael Myers x Reader)

I know I never really got back into writing because I never really got back the motivation after certain things happened. But hey, I started this fic who knows when ago and actually got the motivation to finish it. Hopefully it’s good, I kinda just skimmed thorugh it because I have a hard time reading my own writings and like I said, a good portion of this was written a good while ago and the rest is what I wrote recently. Anyways, have some Michael Myers

Plot: Michael Myers has his eye set on a person he met during his time at Smith’s Grove. Takes place after the second Halloween movie, with a fewe things changed to fit the narrative.

Word Count: 4,866

Warnings: Not much really, mentions of n*dity but nothing explicit. The usual stalking from Michael, mentions of killing obviously. Loomis being Loomis.

The face of Halloween was now nothing more than a white veneer, a haunting sight to any that lay eyes upon it.

Fifteen years ago, not very many felt the terror they started to feel just a week ago. Fifteen years ago, it was nothing but a young boy and his deceased sister. Fifteen years ago, nobody would have expected such a Halloween.

“Thirteen murders in two days. On Halloween night, twenty-one year old Michael Myers escaped from Smiths Grove Sanitarium before stealing from a local hardware store in quiet Haddonfield.”

Michael Myers, that was the name that escaped so many fifteen years ago but ceased soon after when nobody no longer cared.

“At just six years old Michael Myers murdered his elder sister Judith Myers in cold blood, his lust for blood growing the following fifteen years. This past Halloween, only a single of the escapee’s victims survived the attack. Seventeen year old Laurie Strode remains in Haddonfield Memorial Hospital, nearly recovered from the physical and emotional trauma the so-called ‘Boogeyman’ inflicted on her.”

And even this time, their fear grew into a void once a secret was revealed to the public. Nobody feared the Boogeyman; what was there to worry about when they were not who he was after?

“After having survived the home invasion, Strode had to endure yet another attack from the masked fiend who followed her to the hospital the same night. Whilst there, Myers murdered nine people in the hospital, adding on to the previous four. In the end, Strode survived the massacre when Myers’ psychologist arrived to shoot him down and burn him in the hospital’s oxygen room.”

Word spread around. Word that there was another member in the Myers’ family, that only she was the one the murderer was after.

“But in the end, no charred body was recovered.”

Little had the people known, the Shape had his eye on more than one.

“Only a week has gone by but Haddonfield still asks, what could have happened to this malicious hunter?”

Void-like eyes stared through the open window, standing in place with hands laying at each side. Heavy breathing was heard behind the mask, only coming near would allow people to hear such breaths.

Eyes cared not for those that sat on the other side of the glass, sitting on their  couch ever so…vulnerable.

Oblivious.

Helpless.

Naive.

The shape stood in place, eyes staring into the television set in front of them. On it, the picture of a young blonde, the picture taken after the second attack.

Head soon turned before its body followed, calmly striding down a self-made path through the backyard of these unknowing residents who never realized there was someone watching their  every move for more than a few minutes.

The streets of Orange Grove Avenue was nothing but an empty street, nobody in sight unless it was very necessary to go out. Even without the lack of fear, most preferred that their  children would remain at home. Adults thought the same for themselves, thoughts plagued with the idea of accidentally coming across a bloody sight that would end with them as a murdered witness.

Through hedges and trees strolled the figure, never noticed by those who peeked through their closed curtains. The voids of his mask stared straight ahead, eventually looking to the side when their  head finally turned.

From behind a tree, the shape stalked the source from whence a sound was heard.

A door opened to reveal another shape, one whose hand tightly clutched onto a worn out satchel before she gently set it on the ground. Hand now reached into the pocket of her  jacket, making sure that nothing was forgotten back inside her  home, nodding in satisfaction once she pulled out her keys.

The shape stood in the distance, keeping a calm yet very attentive stance as he concealed himself with a tree across the street from the home he watched. He saw the person fumble a bit with her  pocket, shaking soon ceasing before she lifted her head ever so slowly.

Eyes glanced to the left and then the right, head now being the one to move while an uneasy feeling overcame her. A deep feeling of trepidation soon hit when her  eyes landed on the tree standing in the distance, half of a man’s body revealed with a face so pale it looked unreal in her  perspective.

Once again, a shock came when she felt a vibration and heard a jingle, making her look down at her  jacket where her  phone rang.

She pulled out the phone before answering it, placing it against her  ear while looking back up at the tree. Nothing nor anybody stood there, leaving that uneasy feeling while she now shut and locked the door to then make her  way to her  car.

Before actually starting it, she turned to look behind, seeing nothing again. So, with her  phone on its holder, she started the car and drove away, never realizing that darkened eyes were watching from a distance.

_____________

In an isolated property where only light hit stood the shape, behind a fence that no longer proved to serve its purpose. Through it he watched an empty field with nothing but tables for those cursed inside to sit whenever breaks were given. Beyond this empty space was the large building that could have never contained him.

He walked alongside the fence, turning to the right when he reached the building’s other perimeter. From his location, he saw her again.

This time, the person wore a badge on her  jacket as she got out of her car. With her satchel once again in her  hand, she locked the car before making her way through the parking lot until reaching the sidewalk that would lead her to the front entrance of the building. Before continuing, however, she paused her   walking to look at the sign reading a damaged “Smith’s Grove   Sanitarium”. With a shake of her  head, she followed the path before finally walking into the building.

Behind some bushes, the shape watched it all until the person was no more behind darkened glass. He stood there, breaths now soft as she allowed the sound of his heart pumping hard with adrenaline. It was always said that the shape felt nothing, he was but a vessel containing evil alone. But somehow, there was something in him that not even the “best” of psychologists could discover in such a being.

“Looking into those eyes alone is dangerous enough.”

“Why is that?”

“They are the devil’s eyes. There is nothing but evil behind them.”

Such words were enough to make one turn, though the sound of voices coming from outside were also sufficient.

In a room deep inside the corridors of Smith’s Grove was a bed. To the surprise of many it proved to be one of the tidiest beds ever; sheets never undone save for a few wrinkles every now and then.

On the bed sat the patient not many dared near, the story of what he did years back sending chills down the staff’s spines.

“D…devil’s eyes? Dr. Loomis, you can’t be serious. I’ve heard all kinds of things from you, but this is new.”

From the bed, the patient listened ever so attentively, yet he did so without a care in the world. Eyes stared into the nothingness of the white wall before him while his body remained still and hunched over.

The jingling of keys sounded outside of the room, the sound loud enough to echo through the ever so silent hallways of the sanitarium. Soon enough the creaking of the room’s door followed; in the doorway stood two figures who silently peered inside.

One remained on the spot while the other immediately strode in without a care, ignoring the slight worry he had inside. A worry not about him necessarily, but more like the one he had for others such as the person who had accompanied him, and the ones who ran the sanitarium without any concern.

“Michael.” The man now stood at the foot of the bed, staring at the patient sitting on the bed.

The patient never bothered to look any other way, eyes fixated on the wall . Almost as if he wasn’t seeing it…instead, looking past it.

Even then, the man knew that he was aware of his guests.

“Maybe you should leave.”

“Excuse me?” the doctor turned to the doorway, still keeping his distance from the patient who, in the slightest and unnoticable bit, turned his head to the side.

“I’m just saying, I’ve seen that Michael doesn’t exactly…” the other person took a step inside, glancing over at the patient. “React when you’re around.”

“I am the only one in this sanitarium who can approach Michael without being injured.” Loomis now stepped towards her, once again not realizing that the patient’s head had turned even more. “I am his doctor and you are nothing but a temporary transfer.”

“I know-”

“You are in no place to be telling me what to do with Myers.” Loomis sternly spoke, then reaching a hand out to the other individual who turned away with a sigh. “Where are the others?”

“They’re on their   way.” she spoke as she handed a clipboard over to the psychiatrist that immediately looked over the papers in hand.

“Once they’re here, you may excuse yourself.”

“What?”

“Did I stutter?” Loomis’  frown deepened.

“You’re not getting rid of me that easily.”

“Is that so?”

“My purpose is to examine Michael because your incompetent ass can’t do so.”

Now this had noticeably riled up Loomis who had unconsciously turned his back on his patient, the latter still ever so slightly paying attention to the conversation.

“I know you don’t like working with me Loomis, I learned that along the way. I point out the reality while you continue to insist on foolish tales only a man like you can spin.” the person spat at the elderly man who could not believe the way he was being spoken to. “My tasks threaten your job, even if I only do the medical work. A man like you deserves and could land a spot in an institution such as this one with your lunatic rambles. So either step down and let me do my job, or I’ll have a chat of my own with the administration.”

Loomis could only eye this…unfortunate individual. Examining the as if he were examining a patient of his, looking for any flaws he could spur into a tale of demons and evil. To him, this temporary associate was no more than a burden in between him and Michael. Him and the Devil himself, waiting to unleash hell.

He began making his way out of the room, but not before he glanced back at Michael who had clearly been staring at the white of his room’s walls this entire time. Not a single care or thought in the world.

“I’ll have you packing your things before you even know it.” he promised while slamming the clipboard onto the nurse’s chest, lips near her  ear as she stepped away from him, realizing that the other staff had come by. For the first time since Michael had been incarcerated, Loomis didn’t bother to remain in the room.

“Alright Mikey,” one of the two guards that arrived spoke out. “You know how this goes.”

The apparent leader of the pair had handcuffs ready, these being placed on Michael’s wrists as he made it seem like he still stared at the wall.

Michael ignored every word and action that came from the guards, eyes instead focused on the staff member who was still in the room. Brown locks concealed his dark gaze, eyes following her  fingers that reached into the pocket of her  uniform trousers. From it, a pen was pulled out.

Pen and paper now connected as the nurse wrote notes, or perhaps random scribbles due to her  not being much to report at the moment.

It was a rather funny pen. A fountain pen is what it was. Somewhat girthy, made out of cheap plastic. Pink.

One of the only pieces of color Michael ever really saw inside the sanatorium, the only other times being when Loomis conducted certain examinations or when Michael was fed.

Black ink spilled from the pen and onto the paper, nothing more than a tool to further his years in this building. Black ink that came from this funny little pen, providing the only tint of life in the darkness of these white walls that caged Michael.

Black ink…spilling…merging with the warm crimson from inside the skin. It was almost lovely, the thought of a brightly colored tool, impaling the soft skin of this particular caretaker.

“You ready, doc?”

“It’s nurse.” Michael’s staring was interrupted as he felt hands grab onto his arms, hoisting him up from the bed before he nearly came face to face with his nurse. “And yes, we can take him now. Loomis should be waiting for us, if he hasn’t decided to throw a fit in his office.”

“You and the old guy don’t care much for each other, huh?” a guard spoke up as she followed behind the nurse, Michael sandwiched between the men who led him through the halls.

“I don’t care for any so-called psychologist who runs his mouth like a madman. I don’t think he’s qualified to be a psychologist.”

“Uh huh.” one of the guards replied, the words not having gone through his head properly, as he was another one of the many members who worked without giving a damn about the environment they surrounded themselves in.

“Loomis is a bitch, to put it simple.” the nurse rolled her  eyes, hearing the jingling of keys that came from the guards as well as the cuffs that contained Michael. “He doesn’t know what he’s doing, can’t properly care for a patient. I don’t know how he even takes care of himself.”

No more words came from any of the staff as her and Michael’s footsteps echoed through the empty hallways she walked through. Were it not for the continuous jingling, one could have even come to hear Michael’s breaths.

“What now?”

“Michael takes a seat, and we wait for Loomis. You two can leave once he’s here, unless he instructs otherwise.” the nurse scanned the empty room where only a metallic table and two chairs sat in the middle. Behind one of the chairs was a large mirror, one that obviously served for watching whatever interaction occurred inside. It only showed how not-so credible Loomis’ objections were.

“Actually,” a new voice sounded, making everyone but Michael look to the open door, for another nurse had come by.  “I will be staying in your place for a moment. You’re needed elsewhere.”

“Where, exactly? I can’t leave Michael alone with a nurse he’s not used to seeing.”

“I doubt he’ll care much about the change.” this other nurse stated as she made her way into the room, reaching out to grab the clipboard. “The higher ups just want to have a quick conversation.”

“It’s because of Loomis, isn’t it? That bastard.”

“Just deal with it quickly, I have other patients that actually need attending.”

“Alright, just…”

Michael had been seated in the chair opposite from the mirror on the wall, cuffed hands forcibly placed on the table in front of him as his head remained lowered.

“Just treat him right. Please.”

“Sure thing.” the nurse uttered, watching the other walk out of the room.

“What, is someone catching feelings for little ol’ Mikey?” one of the guards snickered once she was out of sight, the two guards chuckling among themselves while the remaining nurse rolled her eyes.

“Hope not, could send her back to the hospital she came from. Even then, dunno what anyone would see in a crazy like Myers.”

And all the while the staff paid no mind to the patient, Michael had actually turned his head.

Eyes looked to the empty and open doorway, almost as if waiting for his nurse to return.

With eyes fixated on the building, the shape now watched as the main doors opened once more. From the doors came the nurse, not having spent much time inside. If she had spent this little in the building on a night she were meant to work, something had changed.

He watched from a distance, taking notice of the lack of Smith’s Grove badge. He didn’t have to eavesdrop on any conversation to know what had gone on.

There was no intention of hiding himself this time, but he also didn’t care if his presence was made known. All that mattered was her, watching every move as she trudged down the sidewalk with her  satchel tightly grasped into.

Despite the distance between the two, it was almost as if this nurse- former nurse could feel him breathing right behind her  neck.

She ceased her walking, nails now digging into her  bag as she scanned her  surroundings, feeling eyes on her…

Beyond the yards of Smith’s Grove Sanitarium, beyond the fence surrounding the perimeter, her  eyes met with the darkest eyes, ever so slightly shaded from the light. Or at least, that was what her  eyes saw, somehow being able to make out…

“The Devil’s Eyes.” he read her  lips murmur, spoken in complete disbelief.

He remained in place, body as stiff as ever as he only…examined, just like she did to him many times.

Was it a figment of her  imagination? Was Michael Myers, the now so-called Boogeyman, really just…watching?

Whatever the answer, he saw her hurriedly threading to the parking lot, immediately finding her  vehicle which she hopped into after struggling to find her  keys. Once inside, she wasted no more time, her  next destination being home.

_____________

She wasn’t up to very much. She was merely…sitting.

Eating.

Thinking.

Thinking more than him no doubt, especially as he stood by the window that led into the brightly lit kitchen. Eyes stared into the glass, watching the individual who did nothing but sit with a slice of bread in hand. In the other, a rather large kitchen knife, the first one that she had pulled out from her  knife block.

She was clearly unbothered by things, but there was still a sort of affliction present on her  features.

He watched her bite into the piece of bread she had cut for herself, ever so slowly chewing the bit. her  lips, moisturized with a lick of her   lips that rid of all the tiny crumbs that even he was able to perceive from the distance he stood at.

He never blinked, merely watched with an intensity that brought a chill down her  spine.

Her eyes widened at the strange feeling of being watched, whipping her   head around as she searched for a possible answer. But just like every other time, there was nothing or nobody that could have been keeping an eye on her.

“I’m going insane…” she mumbled to herself, setting down her  piece of bread before pushing her  seat out to stand and approach the kitchen sink. In her  hand was the knife, this being washed up immediately, ever so carefully.

It gleamed under the kitchen’s light, almost making a sound as if it were a sword drawn from its scabbard.

“This was all it took.”

A kitchen knife was all it took to take the many lives of many innocents. A kitchen knife that glinted under almost anything. A kitchen knife that reflected dark pools of that made one stare into oblivion.

Once again, she spun around, this time in a panic. Through the knife she had seen the white veneer, staring right back at her with such vehemence. But alas, just like every time, nothing stood at the window, it was clearly only a figment of her  imagination. Nothing but an apparition.

“I’ve heard wondrous things about you.”

“Oh, I doubt that. I’m just like any other nurse. I’m sure anyone else could do this job.”

“You’re too humble. I’ve heard about your handling of Billy and, it’s impressed me and other nurses.”

Smith’s Grove Sanitarium, you weren’t sure why an institution such as this one specifically requested someone with your expertise. Someone apparently “perfectly skilled” as a nurse, whatever that meant. It was one of the staff members who had desired a nurse such as yourself, a nurse who would be personally assigned to Michael Audrey Myers.

“And…what is so, special, about this patient?”

“If I’m being honest, I’m not entirely sure.” your new but temporary supervisor, Dr. Wynn,  admitted as he walked you down the corridors of the sanitarium. “Myers’ primary psychologist, Dr. Samuel Loomis, is particularly…wary.”

“Of his own patient? I mean, I can understand but, aren’t patients like Michael restrained?”

“That’s not it. Samuel apparently sees something in Michael. Believes there is no redeeming, that Michael is only…waiting.”

“For…?”

“I don’t know, Samuel’s lectures tend to disturb me and some of the other staff at times. We don’t always pay much attention to his rants.” the man gave a shrug, turning on his heel as he and you made it to a door that was marked with a sign reading “M. MYERS”. “We worry that because of this apprehension, that he doesn’t properly care for Michael. We can’t exactly have a patient pass due to lack of care.”

“Of course.”

“You see,” he held his breath for a moment, soon enough releasing it. “Samuel doesn’t view Michael as a human being. Has made many suggestions already, but we don’t see Michael posing as the threat he believes he is.”

You nodded at these words, having seen similar stories as you grew up.

“Anyways, I’d formally like to introduce you to Michael.”

The white door disappeared from your view after being unlocked and opened, revealing a young male who was merely…sitting.

“Michael, I’d like you to meet your new, personal nurse…”

Words became nothing as your eyes landed on this man who sat at the edge of his bed, back curved as he leaned and looked forwards. Thick, chocolate curls hid the eyes that peered at the empty wall, almost as if they examined every inch of paint.

Hands were placed on his knees as the tips of his fingers dug into the cloth of his ivory pants. He seemed so tense, yet so calm somehow. There was no change in his staring as he never lifted his gaze, only listening to the words that spewed from the staff’s lips.

“Every day from now on, you will be seeing her. She is here for your every need.”

You snapped back to your senses after feeling a hand clasp onto your shoulder, making you turn to Dr. Wynn who gave you a comforting smile.

“Right,” you offered a minimal smile before turning back to Michael who had still not moved. Not a single bit. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Michael. I look forward to helping you as best as I can.”

“I’ll make sure to have you introduced to Samuel after I chat with you in my office.”

“Sounds good.” you slightly nodded, giving Michael one last look before finally stepping out of the room. “See you soon.”

Dr. Wynn followed suit, closing the door the moment he had stepped out as well. Had he taken even the quickest peek into the miniature window that was on the door, he would have noticed the glance Michael had given you.

Nobody ever noticed these small things. Not even you.

Coming back to reality, she shook her head just a bit. Perhaps it was the sleep that was getting to her.

Putting out of mind the slight scare she had just experienced, she turned her attention back to the empty kitchen sink. There were no more dishes, all wet and clean on the drying rack. All but…the kitchen knife.

Had she misplaced it? No, how could she have so easily lost a knife while lost in her own thoughts?

“Weird,” she spoke to herself, now realizing that the large knife lay at the end of the counter. “I don’t remember leaving it there.”

All the doors and windows were locked, she made sure to check every single thing more than once if there really was a danger lurking around. Perhaps she did leave the knife at the end of the counter, perhaps it was during her slight moment of remembering.

He saw her shake her head, putting aside her thoughts and worries after taking the knife and placing it inside its appropriate spot. Soon after, she removed her top and made her way out of the kitchen, the shape following suit as best as he could-

-inside the home.

After the top was removed, her jeans were next once she was in the bathroom of her house.

A heat formed in the room as she turned the knob of her shower, warm water raining over the empty floor of the bathtub. The sound of the water hitting the floor sufficed in hiding his footsteps, his deep breathing.

He easily went unnoticed, dark eyes fixated on the woman as she removed the rest of her clothing.  Eyes admired every curve of her now bare body, taking notes of every bit and piece of skin. So soft. So warm. So…exposed and unguarded.

There was nothing more than glass doors that divided him and her; a pair of doors being the only thing standing between him and his prey. His head became tilted at the sound of her voice, a song from another time escaping her lips as she sang to herself, never realizing that she had an uninvited audience.

Her body in full view through the glass, only slightly distorted by the glass’ design.

His fists clenched as he was filled with an impulse, an unwavering ardor as he studied her every move.

She ran her hands over her body, almost as if caressing herself, massaging her own knots out. Hands dragged themselves over her thighs, fingers digging into them as she squeezed to provide comfort and relief. The warm, hot water almost provided a feeling of…safety.

A safety that could be interrupted at any moment by anything.

Her fingers were entangled in her locks of hair, soap threatening to fall into her eyes that she immediately shut.

It was almost as if he sensed this, stepping towards the glass doors as his heavy breaths created a foggy effect, breathing almost becoming desperate at the proximity between the two figures. His own clothed skin, so near her nude form; almost touching. Sultry flesh that he had all to himself. Flesh who’s scent he inhaled deeply, registering the smell into his system.

It was just the two of them, and that was how he desired it.

The shower knob was soon turned as the water turned off, the only sound in the entire house being the droplets from her hair and chin dripping onto the wet flooring. Once she wiped the remaining water from her face, she properly opened her eyes to look into the emptiness of her bathroom. The scathing water had fogged up all the glass inside the bathroom, hiding the fading imprint of large hands that had been placed on the glass doors.

_____________

Hours had gone by as he remained inside the house, haunting the halls like a phantom with no trace. It was almost ridiculous, foolish even, that the man was not once noticed.

Not even as he stood at her bedside.

A slumber befell the woman not too long after she lay in bed. Once changed into a set of comfortable nightwear, she promptly brought her exhausted form into bed. In front of her was a television, still powered on after hours of watching the leftover Halloween specials.

Her body was curled up against her pillow, eyes softly shut as her chest moved with every breath.

The vulnerability present was ever so tantalizing.

Large, strong hands were slowly lifted, inching closer and closer to the woman’s unsuspecting figure. His hands moved on impulse, wanting to latch onto her neck. Wanting to squeeze her throat awake. Wanting to have her eyes shoot open as she reacted too late. Wanting to have the life drained out of her body with every squeeze.

How quick and easy it would have been to overpower her. Suffocate her. Slice her. Thrust her own gleaming blade into her chest to spill the crimson liquid he had come to see so often.

“Michael…”

His breathing deepened even more at the sound of his name, lips breathing out the name of the Devil himself without realizing the consequence. Out of instinct, almost, one of his large hands brought itself onto her exposed leg, stroking the skin with an unexpected gentleness.

Immediately removing his hand, his head gave one final tilt before he took his time spinning around. His eyes landed on the television set that only presented its viewers with nothing but static.

Something had told him it was best to switch it off before officially making his way out.

[axwalker]

Creep 2: I don’t care if it hurts

HIGH SCHOOL AU

Pairing: Drake Walker x MC  (Lexie O’Brien) Book TRR

MASTERLIST HERE

Synopsis: Drake and Lexie are star-crossed lovers. Her father hates him and forces Lexie to stop any contact with Drake. Lost and heartbroken, he “bullies” her for two years until he discovers the truth of Lexie’s behavior.

A/N 1 This came up to me after I got an ask from @nestledonthaveone​ to write a fic based on the song CREEP.

I used to hear this song when I was a teenager, so when I read this ask, I immediately wanted to write something angsty but situated in high school.

A/N 2: Because they’re younger than usual, I decided to change my  FC. 

Words: 4,110 

WARNINGS: Parental abuse, domestic violence, toxic love.

THIS IS NOT YOUR USUAL MARSHMALLOW DRAKE. He was abandoned as a boy, he’s tortured and he doesn’t know how to express his love. His behavior is not excusable.

This is a dark love story. If you’re not comfortable with it, PLEASE do not read it.  

ALL MY FICS ARE 18+

TAGS ON THE COMMENTS

As this is darker than usual; I’m only tagging the people who commented in the previous chapter. If you want to get on or off the list for this fic, please do not hesitate to ask!! 

DRAKE

Even if she never looks at me or speaks to me again, she’s mine. Even if I’ve been a horrible jerk to her for two years and she pales every time I pull into the parking lot on my motorcycle, she is mine. Just seeing her with him enrages me, so I walk straight toward my usual seat, directly behind Lexie, and slam my textbook down onto the desk.

Startled, Rys looks up at me, “Hey, Walker. What’s up?” 

It’s not the first time he tries to make a move on Lexie. Last time –two years ago, we almost killed each other. Pretty boy might be an entitled ass, but he knows how to fight. Maybe he thinks Lexie is game again after all this time. He couldn’t be more wrong. 

 “Don’t you have a class this period?” I ask him. Liam cocks his left eyebrow, adjusting the straps of his backpack. 

“I fail to see why that concerns you, Creep.”  

My smile is murderous. “Get the fuck out of here before I break your face, pretty boy.”

I think he has a death wish because he looks at Lexie when he talks, “See you after class, Alexis, when your watchdog will be busy mowing my lawn.” Finally, he just shakes his head and gets out of the classroom. I resume my daily routine. Staring at the back of Lexie’s head, tracing the curve of her perfect neck, my cock getting hard over her perfect cherry scent. 

“So that’s what you like,” I say, leaning forward to speak an inch from her ears. “You like them with blond hair and pink polo shirts. Prospects for Cambridge or shit. A huge trust fund. Don’t you? A brat like you needs someone who can spoil her. I bet you’d introduce him to daddy, wouldn’t you?” 

She doesn’t respond. She never does. Her eyes stay stubbornly on the front of the class where the teacher has started writing today’s lesson on the board—my hands fist in desperation. I’m dying for her to talk to me. To look at me. Anything. “Too bad, Lexie. I’ll scare every single one of those fucking entitled boys off. You’re going to sit alone in your house on prom night, crying into your designer sheets like a baby. And I’m going to enjoy it.” 

The only sign that she hears me at all is the quickening rise and fall of her shoulders. Even that tiny display that I’ve upset her is agonizing, floods me with self-loathing, but I can never stop. She ripped out my fucking heart, and I can’t deal with the consequences of that alone. I can’t let her go. I’ll never let her go. This toxic feeling is the only thing left between us. My hands shake with the urge to take her in my arms, to stop the trembling I caused. To protect her from everything. Even myself. I’d love to move my fingers up into the silky, brown hair that reaches the middle of her graceful neck. I don’t have a lot of money; most of the cash I earn as a handyman goes to food and fixing my dad’s cabin, but I’d give every last cent for her to turn and lock those soft brown eyes on me, just one last time. Sometimes when I jerk off, all it takes is fantasizing about Lexie looking at me, giving me one of those shy smiles, and I lose it. One stroke. Maybe two. Done. I can’t breathe without having her close. And I can’t breathe with her close. It’s a strange condition, this obsession, but she’s an addiction that I just can’t give up. 

How could I? She’s intelligent, strong, and so damned gorgeous. Once upon a time, I thought she had a good heart too. But that was before she broke my pathetic heart only because I’m poor. I’ve been hurting since then, and I need her to hurt too. To know what it feels.

“Do you actually think that dumb rich boy would be a good choice for your first time, Lexie?” I grip my desk so tight it nearly breaks down, just thinking about her being kissed –touched by someone else. “At least that’s one thing us poor motherfuckers have going for us. We know how to fuck. If you went out with Rys for a while, you’d eventually give in and come slumming it one night, wouldn’t you? Knock on my rundown cabin door, begging me to fuck you as we both know you’d like.”

A pretty blush is starting to climb her neck. I have to take a deep breath to keep from kiss her pink cheeks. But I think if I got to touch her skin, my wall of bullshit would crumble. I’ve only fucked one girl. Since seeing Lexie for the first time freshman year, there’s been no one but her. I want no one else. She owns my cock as sure as she owns my heart. How easily she’s forgotten about both leaving me in agony. 

“Stop,” she breathes. I freeze. Did she just speak to me? It’s the first time in two years that she’s even remotely acknowledged my existence. 

“Lexie,” I managed to say. I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. That’s all it took. One pleading word out of her mouth, and I’m done. 

“Just stop,” she says again, turning her head slightly. “Please.” 

I fall back in my chair, my heart thundering on my chest. If we weren’t in the middle of class, if I didn’t feel like a monster, I would pull her into my arms right now. I’d hug her until she stopped struggling, then beg her to hit me, bruise me, make me pay for every shitty thing I’ve ever said to her. But before long, the class is over, and she’s leaving the classroom to get out of here. To put distance between us as quickly as possible—and I have no choice but to watch her because I feel physically ill. Still, I manage to get out into the student-packed hallway, my plan to apologize for being crude and a jerk and torturing her for so long. 

My head is telling me not to apologize, though. It’s telling me she deserved it for being such a snob, for breaking me, for valuing money and status like everyone else. My damned heart is telling an entirely different story. It’s insisting there is an explanation for her behavior. Am I going to apologize or not? The decision is taken out of my hands when Lexie opens her locker, and the little gift I left before class falls down. It’s a picture I cut out from our last yearbook. In the photo is a gorgeous smiling Lexie above the caption Most Likely to Succeed. Except I’ve crossed out the caption and added my own. Most Likely to Be a Trophy Wife. Watching her read it, I almost get sick right there in the hallway. Usually, she’s perfectly composed, not betraying a trace of emotion where I’m concerned—a real Ice queen. I’ve always thought she honestly didn’t care. Today, though… she’s not pulling it off. Something is not okay with her, and I don’t like it. She has to bite down on her bottom lip to stop it from quivering as she puts the photo back into her locker, out of sight, her bright eyes finding me briefly, massacring me where I stand. Betraying with one single look how much she has been affected by my actions. Christ. She hasn’t been indifferent at all.

Before I can react, before I can call her name, she’s gone, vanished into the crowd of wild students excited to be leaving for the day. And I know what I have to do. I have to see her. To apologize. To get an explanation for everything. Tonight. I’ll return to her house for the first time in two years.

LEXIE

I’ve known this was coming all day. Sitting on the couch in my living room, trying to make myself as small as possible, I watch my father pace. He rants, gesticulating noisily. This isn’t new, my father’s rage threatening me. But it’s going to be worse than usual. Business has declined for him and it’s put his temper on a trigger. Dad’s new wife, Nancy, hates to be on a budget, and she’s been spending his money like crazy all over Paris --where she’s now. When dad gets home from the office, he’s rarely in anything but a horrible mood. A tornado eating up everything in its path. Completely terrifying. At least dad’s temper makes me forget what Drake told me today, the ugly words he said to me, the boiling anger in his eyes when he looks at me. 

“Are you even listening?” The slap across the face comes as a shock because I’d momentarily disappeared into my thoughts, but the sting quickly brings me back to reality. 

“Yes, sir,” I say, my ears ringing. “I’m listening.” 

“This C on your algebra test is going to drag your whole average down.” He’s waving the test in my face. “What a disappointment you are, Alexis. Your teacher shared my disgust.” I nod solemnly, but I’m listening for the rain outside. “I guess you’re your daughter’s mother after all. A poor Mexican girl who could barely count.” It’s not true. My mom learned English and Greek by herself, and she was a great Spanish teacher in Portavira, but my father would rather die than acknowledge how smart she was. 

“Don’t talk like that about her,” I retort.

My father snorts. “I beg your pardon?” He takes a step towards me, and I can see the threat in his eyes. 

“I’m sorry.” I hate to be such a coward, but I know what he can do to me.” I’ll do extra credit. Something to bring my grade back up to an A.” I wet my lips. “Even if I can’t manage to raise the grade, it’s not going to show up on the college transcripts I sent off with my applications.” That’s the reason I let my focus slip a little in algebra. The finish line is in sight for everyone, and we’re just waiting to find out where we’ll be accepted for college. It’s a wonder I’ve been able to maintain my focus this long in any class, considering Walker sits behind me in every period, brooding making me feel … something. At the reminder of him, I want to close my eyes and dream about him. I replay that night in my garden when he kissed me two years ago, so tenderly and passionately, when he spoke to me so sweetly and honestly before he became the second villain in my story. Someone I dread, as much as I crave the sight of him.  

At least that’s one thing us poor motherfuckers have going for us. We know how to fuck. If you went out with that punk for a while, you’d eventually give in and come slumming it one night, wouldn’t you? Knock on my trailer door, begging me to ride you right. 

Should I be ashamed of the way my body reacted to those words? I grew uncomfortably damp in the hard plastic chair, the center of my body clenching, seeming to beat like a heart. His breath on my neck made me shiver, head to toe. Even the way he scared off Liam Rys did something to me. Aroused me. Deeply. It got so bad that I broke the rules and asked him to stop. I can still hear him saying my name in that tortured way after. That shocked, uneven sound. Lexie. And whether I’m ashamed of myself for it or not, I know I’ll think of it when I touch myself tonight. His voice, his hands, his eyes obsess me. 

“College?” My father snorts, tearing the test in half. “You’re not going to college.” 

This grabs my attention. A horrible feeling is making me cold. “I’m…what? What do you mean? I applied to nine different schools. I have a four-point five GPA.” 

For the first time, I notice his red face is about more than just rage. There’s…humiliation. I’ve never seen him display that emotion. 

“None of the American colleges that accepted you offered scholarships.” 

“I’ve been accepted?” I gasp, sitting forward, heart pounding in my chest. “Where? I didn’t see the letters—” 

“All the mail in this house goes through me, Alexis. I read them. And you failed to get academic scholarships. You failed. Not that I’m surprised.”

 I don’t point out that his refusal to let me participate in any extracurricular activities is more than likely to blame for that. I’m too worried about what he’s saying, what this means. The blood is draining from my head, making the room spin around me. 

“Okay, I’m sorry about that. I’m sorry. But…we have money. We can pay tuition, can’t we? Or colleges in Cordonia are almost for free. I can go to any of them; I don’t have to go to NYU.” I have to get out of here. I have to get out of here. This is my way out. College is the escape route. I counted on going back to New York, but I can stay here and go to college in Cordonia City. 

“Listen to you, so quick to spend my hard-earned money—spoiled brat. And of course, you can’t go to college in Cordonia. What for? To end up being a schoolteacher like your mom? A housewife as Nancy?” He laughs bitterly. “No, you’ll stay here, and I’ll help you find someone suitable to marry.” 

I shake my head. “There’s financial aid, then. Loans or I can get a job and go to college in Portavira…” 

“You want to leave, just like her, don’t you? You’re all the same.”

 I don’t even flinch when he yanks me to my feet, shoving me into the wall. In fact, for the first time, I took him right into his eyes. And I can see the violence burning on them has nothing to do with me. It never had anything to do with how I behave, my choices, how hard I worked in school. How welcome I made Nancy feel or cooked a roast. It’s about him and his self-loathing. It’s his sickness. Not mine. I can also see that he was never going to send me to college. Because he wouldn’t be able to control me from a distance or stop me from sharing what I’ve been subjected to since my mother died. Not like he does now. He wasn’t physically abusive all the time. Especially not when his new wife is around. But she traveled often, and then he’d push me. Shove me. Slapped me several times. I’ll graduate at the top of my class for nothing. He knew I would all along. 

That’s when I realize I’m free. I don’t have money, but college is free in Cordonia. I can work, save a little and go to college in one or two years. I’ll be a writer; it’ll just take more time than I thought. “Go to hell,” I whisper. 

He steps back, giving me the momentary satisfaction of his shock. “What did you say?”

Liberated, I scream it this time. “Go to hell!” From the moment I sat down to have this conversation, I knew tonight would be worse than usual, but I’ve just bought myself a ticket to hell. Usually, I can retreat to the untouchable place inside of me as he unleashes his rage, but not tonight. He doesn’t stop at one or two slaps. He punches and kicks, and I’m present for every punch and kick. Every yelled insult. Finally, I start to get scared. I’m crawling across the carpet on my hands and knees, searching for a weapon I can use in my defense when I glance out the window and see Drake staring back at me, his face a mask of horror.

 Drake

 What I’m seeing just isn’t possible. It can’t be real. My head won’t accept it. Not until her terror-filled eyes meet mine through the window and the truth pounds on my chest, leaves no doubt that this is real life. Lexie’s father is beating her. Her mouth is bloody, one of her eyes beginning to swell, arms and legs visibly weakened. I can barely fucking process it before my body is springing into action, desperate to protect her. To put a stop to the worst thing I have ever seen. What the fuck. Scorching hot rage takes over. I kick in the front door and throw myself between Lexie and her father. His fist is raised, but it pauses when he sees me, his momentary confusion giving me the time I need to knock him out cold. It only takes one right uppercut from someone his own size, and he goes down, his blank, glassy eyes staring at nothing, mouth opened. It’s not satisfying enough.

Nothing will ever be satisfying enough. I want to kill him, destroy him, but my Lexie is struggling for breath behind me, and she’s all I can think about. Turning, I approach her, my heart threatening to jump off my chest. As gently as I can, I catalog all of the cuts and purpling skin. No. No. Who could do this to her? Who could lay a finger on her in anything but reverence? Get her out of here. Calling her name, I reach down to pick her up, but she flinches and hurries back, bringing her body up against the wall. 

“Don’t touch me!” Those words filled with fear rip the soul clean out of my body. My hands drop limply to my sides and two years come rushing back, hitting me in the chest like a hammer. Every word, every action. Everything I did to make her life harder when this is what she’s been dealing with at home? Fuck me. 

“Lexie…” My voice is as kind as I can. I feel broken. “I’m sorry. I came here to apologize. For everything.” 

She puffs a humorless laugh, testing her cut lip with the tip of her tongue. “Bet you weren’t expecting to see this.” 

“If I knew this was happening, I would have been here a long time ago. I would have stopped it. I swear Lex.” 

Her expression can only be described as stunned. Maybe even a little pissed. “You are not my savior, Drake. You are my enemy. You’ve been for two years, and I want nothing else from you now.”

 “I am not your enemy.” Those words barely make it out of me, my chest hurts so fucking bad. “Don’t say that.” 

Unsteadily, she uses the wall to try and stand. I try to help her, but she recoils, and it’s a dagger straight into the center of my throat. Nothing less than I deserve, though, isn’t it? Her distrust of me is entirely my fault. I’ve made her hate me. There has to be some way to fix what I’ve done. Please God, let there be away. But right now, my main concern is her physical safety. Knowing she’s been in danger all along is unbearable. I only decided to come here tonight a few hours ago. What if I didn’t? What if I arrived an hour later? The possibilities are going to haunt me for the rest of my life. From the floor, her father groans, shifting slightly. 

“We need to get you out of here,” I say, anxious to get her free of this place. “Now, Lexie. I need to get you somewhere safe.” 

She’s standing now. Leaning against the wall and cradling one arm to her stomach, regarding me warily. “How do I know I’m safe with you?” It’s so much worse that her question is honest. Not meant to hurt me. She honestly doesn’t know if I pose a threat. It guts me where I stand. 

“You are the safest with me,” I say thickly, cursing myself. Wanting to erase the last two years so badly, my hands shake. “Please believe me. I’d die before hurting you. I’d never, Lexie. I’d never do something like that.” 

Her father rolls over onto his back and slurs a few words before losing consciousness again. Still, the sound of the older man’s voice seems to scare Lexie, “I…maybe you can just give me a ride to…a motel maybe?” She pushes off the wall, her step uneven as she walks toward the stairs. “I need some things from my room.” 

It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell her we don’t have time, but I’m just grateful she’s trusting me enough to leave with me, so I don’t argue. I just wait until she’s halfway up the stairs, then tie her father’s hands behind his back with my belt in case he wakes up before we leave. I have no problem knocking him out a second time, but Lexie has seen enough violence for one night. Cautiously, I walk up the stairs toward the light coming from a room halfway down the hall. This place is a far cry from my home. It’s elegant and clean, and tasteful, but it lacks any warmth whatsoever. It’s cold, like a museum. Turning the corner into Lexie’s room, it’s time to hate myself all over again. There is nothing on the walls, none of the expensive furnishings. Just four white walls, a bed, and a dresser that doubles as a desk. Several textbooks. She looks back at me over her shoulder as if judging my reaction, and I keep my features impassive, though I’m dying on the inside. 

“What can I do?” I ask. 

“How long do we have?” 

“As long as you need.” It’s physically painful not to pull her into my arms when I’m standing this close, and she’s hurt. Sad. Yet full of more inner strength than I’ve ever witnessed in another human being. I’m lucky just to be in her presence. I fucked up royally. And if she allows me back in, I’ll never do it again. It’s probably, definitely, too much to hope for. Being allowed back in. She doesn’t even look sure about having me in her room. Let alone her heart. I was trying to protect my own heart, but I lost it instead. 

 “Um…” She closes her eyes to focus, a familiar trait I’ve seen in class countless times. “There is a black bag in the hallway closet. Can you just stuff anything into it from the bathroom that looks useful?” 

Ask me to bring you a unicorn. I’ll find a way to do it. “Sure.” We work in silence, Lexie taking things out of drawers and adding them to the bag, which I’ve left open on the floor. I add toiletries from the bathroom, and once it’s zipped, I wait, watching her hesitate in the doorway. 

“Lexie?” Conflicted chocolate eyes meet mine. 

“I can’t just leave, can I?” 

“You’re not safe here, baby,” I say softly, trying to keep the residual rage at bay because it’s the last thing she needs. Not to mention she’s had her fill with negativity from me. No more. “How long…how long?” 

She shrugs, the saddest expression in her eyes. “My mom died five years ago. Ever since then, it’s gotten worse and worse. Although I never had a chance to talk to anyone about what happened behind closed doors, you know? I don’t think a person can evolve into a monster. It’s inside him.”

 “I don’t know,” I say. “I became one, didn’t I?” 

That gives her pause, forms a line between her delicate brows. “Yeah. I guess you’re right.” 

She starts to walk past me, stops, standing close enough to fill my nose with cherry. “He told me if I ever spoke to you ever again, he would hurt me. Ruin you, have you evicted. Make sure you never got hired again. I didn’t mean to…hurt you. Or hurt your feelings, if that’s what happened.” 

That revelation destroys me, sets me on fire. “Jesus, Lexie. You were protecting me? And I…I tortured you for it?” I twist the neck of my T-shirt, trying to calm down, but it doesn’t work. I’ll never be calm again “I’m so fucking sorry.” 

She glances at the doorway, then back at me, eyes closed again in that way that says she’s thinking. “All I want from you now is a ride out of here, okay? And on Monday morning, you’ll stop.” She opens her shining eyes again. “No more bullying, Drake. If you’re really sorry, you’ll do that for me.” 

Fuck. I couldn’t say one more single shitty thing to her if my life depended on it. Put me at gunpoint, and I’d rather get shot at than torture this girl for one more second. But I’m highly, painfully aware that with an end to the bullying comes an end to the possessiveness. No more scaring off guys who show interest in her. No more getting close enough in class to count the hairs on her head, to smell her sweet fragrance. And to tell the truth, I’m pretty fucking worried I don’t know how to give those things up completely. I don’t think I can physically do it. This addiction with Lexie isn’t something I can cut off. A leg would be easier to sever. But my hesitation is causing her eyes to worry. If I don’t agree to, essentially, let her go… she’s not going anywhere with me. And that means her safety won’t be guaranteed. I need it to be. More than anything. 

“No more bullying,” I say, finally. A moment later, I follow her out of the room and down the stairs, trying desperately to count the hairs on her head before I no longer have the chance.

[redux-iterum]

A Kindling: Chapter One

(AO3 counterpart here.)

Rusty jerked awake and banged his head on the bottom of the armchair he lay under.

His immediate reaction was to hiss and duck down again, silently bemoaning each residual wave of pain between his ears. The armchair, just tall enough to allow him space to crawl underneath, shifted above him. The top of his human’s head appeared upside-down to peer at him curiously, mane dragging on the floor. He blinked at them and they chuffed, eyes crinkled, before the head disappeared again.

Rusty waited for the last achy throb to fade away before he crawled out from underneath the armchair, stopping to stretch between his human’s feet and shake his fur out to the irritating dinging of the bell on his collar. He felt fingers gently scratch at his neck and between his shoulders, to which he responded with an obligatory purr. The fingers lifted away as the human trilled something in a high pitch. Rusty’s pelt brushed against one of their legs as he turned and headed for the next room.

His food was still there, in its bowl. Rusty ignored it completely, even as his stomach gave a hint of a growl. The stuff tasted terrible and never seemed to make him full. Not for the first time, he reminisced about his last home, where he had been given something soft and much more delicious.

His mind started wandering on the topic of new and old sensations, as it always did, and he distantly felt his feet carrying him through the overly-warm kitchen and to the flap in the door he’d learned to use on his first few days in this house. He barely paid attention to where he was going; he was in the throes of his dream, before he had been startled into the waking world.

It was always the same: he would be prowling through a place he had never been, yet felt right at home in. The place changed every time he dreamed. Sometimes the grass was tall enough that he had to rear up to see ahead, sometimes it was unending stone formations that curved oddly smoothly and arched above his path. Usually…

Rusty pushed through the flap into the night, walked across the yard with cut grass that irritated his pawpads, and leaped onto chairs and pots until he was at the top of the fence that separated him from the outside world.

Usually, it was what he saw ahead of him—a thick forest, so dense with trees and ferns and bushes that it was impossible to track any potential trails to follow, and rich with the scents of the wild. Even from this distance, through the dark and the petrichor from the rain, those scents seemed to find him at all times of the day and night.

Rusty breathed deep, enjoying the freshness of the damp earth and the many, many smells he could not identify from the forest. It was close. Very close—

“There you are!”

Rusty blinked in surprise and turned his head to see another kitten in the next yard, who did a much less graceful job of getting up onto his fence, scrabbling and puffing for air every time he had to heft his considerable weight to meet with his friend.

“I didn’t think you’d be out this late, Smudge,” Rusty said once he had finally sat down on the rail and was catching his breath.  

“Well, I was looking for you all day,” Smudge said, letting out one final huff before sitting up straight. “Were you inside the entire time? What were you doing?”

“Ehm…” Rusty cocked his head sideways a little in thought. “Sleeping, I guess. I was having a lot of nice dreams. I suppose I didn’t want to wake up.”

“Very unlike you, bud.” Smudge gave him an amused look. “Even the old homebody down the way asked where you were today. He said you weren’t around to scare his prey off.”

Rusty snorted. “He’s never caught a thing in his life and we all know it.”

“Well, neither have we,” Smudge said. “Just a matter of time with you, though, I suppose.”

Rusty frowned. “You could catch something one day, too—”

Smudge blinked slowly, unimpressed, and motioned with a paw to his own chest and belly. He was quite different from Rusty—black-and-white and much softer and rounder. He looked like how he lived, never moving far from his bed and food bowl if he could help it.

Rusty, ginger and much wirier, persisted. “Still, you never know.”

“S’pose we don’t.” Smudge glanced out at the forest before them. “Though I wouldn’t dare try, myself. Not over there, anyway, since you keep looking that way.”

“There aren’t really any other places to hunt, though,” Rusty said. “Unless we wanted to go—”

“’We’,” Smudge muttered.

“’We’.” Rusty nodded. “Unless we wanted to go further into the neighborhood and try that park.”

“Eh.” Smudge rolled a shoulder like the very idea of walking that far pained his limbs. “There’re probably ferals out there too.”

Rusty did not respond to this. He was looking back into the forest, thinking. He’d heard stories of feral cats living in those woods—wild giants that lined their borders with the fur of trespassers and ate the bones of helpless kittens and house cats. He’d been warned many times by the adults in his neighborhood to stay away from them, and to run as soon as he saw a hint of their eyes or caught the scent of strange plants and cut wood (whatever that smelled like, he wasn’t sure). Apparently there were even more feral colonies far away, but he knew nothing about them. What everyone was concerned about was the group in the forest.

“Mind a nibble on your thoughts?” Smudge said, jerking Rusty back to the present.

“Just—” Rusty looked between his friend and the woods. “Just wondering what’s in there.”

“Probably nothing good.” Smudge wrinkled his nose distastefully. “A bunch of mud and bullies, I’ll bet.”

“Really?” Rusty looked at Smudge sideways, head tilted a little. “I’ll bet there’s a lot of prey and adventures waiting past those trees.”

“Ohhh,” Smudge said with a grand sarcasm. “Lots of good times in there?”

“All of the good times,” Rusty returned. “And if there are cats, I’ll bet they’re not as bad as everyone says.”

Smudge huffed an amused breath. “Tell you what, you bring one back for me to see myself, one that’s real nice and friendly, and I’ll personally take you to the park tomorrow.”

A spark of something lit up Rusty’s mind. “You know, I might take you up on that.”

All of Smudge’s snarky demeanor vanished in an instant. “Rusty, I was joking.”

“Well, I’m not.” Rusty bunched up and looked over the fence, eyeing the best place to land.

“Don’t—” Smudge puffed up out of the corner of his eye and his volume rose. “Rusty, don’t.”

“No, no, we have a bet.” Rusty jumped and landed with, he proudly noted, barely a stumble. “I’ve got to go find you a feral.”

“They’ll eat you alive!” Smudge protested, looking genuinely anxious. “Come back here! I wasn’t even serious!”

“See you in a while, Smudge!” Rusty called over his shoulder, and started off at a trot through the soft, uncut grass.

“Rusty!” Smudge shouted, but Rusty didn’t look back. He simply padded along, ignoring his friend’s yells, only pausing for an instant as he hit the treeline before pushing his way past a fern. The forest swallowed him and Smudge’s voice faded away.

Rusty stopped a few steps in, eyes wide. The trees, he knew, were always taller than the houses, but up close they seemed to scratch the sky—he wasn’t sure he was even able to see their peaks from here. Some smaller forms of them, much more delicate and thin, fought their way out of the brush that covered almost every bit of ground. The ferns, soft and broad and fringed, took up what the brush didn’t, and patches of incredibly soft grass soaked up what little moonlight they could catch. Everything was vibrant, fresh, alive.

More than that, though, were the scents, so numerous and strong that they threatened to knock Rusty off his feet. Even the trees clouded his nose, and he understood instantly what smells the adults were talking about. The ferns and grass were almost delicious, and the packed soil under his paws smelled not only of rain, but of something that made Rusty’s stomach growl. Something like what he had eaten in his old home.

He wanted to find it.

Without quite understanding what he was doing, Rusty lowered his body into a half-crouch and he tried to pinpoint the scent past all the others. Experimentally, he opened his mouth, and the air brought him a taste that seemed to be coming from his right. He sniffed, turning slowly, ears swiveling.

Something rustled in the ferns, and something else lit up in his head.

Very slowly, very carefully, Rusty moved forward, trying to track the scent as he went. His shoulders brushed against the fronds, but luckily, they made no sound (“Luckily?” What was he trying to sneak up on?). He cursed in his head when his feet shifted the soil and the rustling stopped. He paused, and the rustling eventually continued, as did he.

He closed in on this unknown target, until he ducked below a fern that was blocking his view. In a little clear patch of ground, he could see something tiny and brown scuttling back and forth, digging at the earth or chewing on grass. It had a long, naked tail and wide ears, and Rusty had a vague idea of what it was supposed to be, based on a toy he had at home that looked about the same, save being much more brightly colored.

Again, not having a clue why, Rusty crouched further, eyes focused on the animal. He kept as still as possible, waiting for an opportunity to… do something. The animal was entirely unaware of him. He lifted one paw and took a step, pulling himself closer.

The bush ahead of him violently shook and the animal darted into the undergrowth.

Rusty straightened up, greatly annoyed. He glared at the bush, now catching a scent of something else. Something that was also familiar, but still as new as the rest of this forest. And, going by the continued shaking, something quite large.

Rusty had a faint idea that he should probably run.

[latte-fairytaekwoon]

𝑀𝑎𝑓𝑖𝑎! 𝐴𝑡𝑒𝑒𝑧: 𝑆𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝐻𝑖𝑡𝑠 𝑂𝑛 𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝐺𝑖𝑟𝑙𝑓𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑑

Warnings: Some situations such as violence and harassment are implied here. Don't read if you're sensitive to such topics.

Disclaimer: In no way am I condoning, supporting, justifying or encouraging mafia activities or lifestyle. This is all fictional and not meant to represent real life scenarios.

✿*:･ﾟ𝓚𝓲𝓶 𝓗𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓳𝓸𝓸𝓷𝓰 ﾟ･:*✿

Hongjoong for once had a whole day free from dealing with any business deals that he of course wanted to take you out. Knowing you enjoyed the outdoors, he decided to take you on a romantic stroll through one of his many parks in the city. Just you two, hand in hand, with his men watching over you from a distance of course. Your safety was his top priority at all times.

He excused himself only for a minute to call up the restaurant he wanted to take you to afterwards, make sure all the preparations were ready. Satisfied that his orders were perfectly carried out, he started walking back to you and stopped when he saw someone standing too close to you for his liking. He scoffed, he couldn't even turn away for 2 minutes cause some asshole is already flirting with you.

Walking up behind the man, he tapped his shoulder.

"I suggest you walk away now before I get angry." Was his only warning.

The man scoffed and looked Hongjoong up and down.

"And who are you to think you can order me around short stack?" He mocked him.

Hongjoong simply snapped his fingers and in a matter of seconds, all his men came out and stood around them, awaiting for Hongjoong's next instruction. The man was now visibly shaking as he realized that he angered the wrong person.

Cocking his head to the side, Hongjoong smirked at him before saying:

"Now...... do you want to walk away peacefully or shall I have my men 'escort' you out?"

✿*:･ﾟ𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓴 𝓢𝓮𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓱𝔀𝓪 ﾟ･:*✿

It was a regular occurrence for Seonghwa to take you clubbing. Fancy clubs were usually the place where he had business talks with other mafia leaders. You honestly never felt it as if they were business meetings. You always ended up having fun and more likely than not, Seonghwa ended up pinning you underneath him before the night was over.

It was a new club where you two had to go. Seonghwa knew the risks of wandering into new territory, but there never seemed to be a problem....until now. His eyes were quick to signal out a guy who had been watching you too closely. Clearly, he didn't know you were off limits since he started trying to grind against you, holding your hips in place while you tried to get away from him.

Slamming his fist on the table, he got up and marched where you were. He sharply pulled the man off you before landing a hard punch right in his face. The man stumbled backwards to the force of Seonghwa's hit, landing on one of the tables behind him. He looked up and saw Seonghwa staring daggers at him.

"Consider this your first and only warning: don't ever come near her again. Got it?"

The guy simply nodded and scrambled to get away from Seonghwa's menacing presence. Looking back at you, he held your hands and scanned you all over to make sure you were all right.

"Are you ok?" He asked, his anger now replaced with tenderness and concern for you.

You nodded, thankful he was always there to help you.

"Come on love. Let's get out of here. I don't ever want to come back to this place again. "

✿*:･ﾟ𝓙𝓮𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓨𝓾𝓷𝓱𝓸ﾟ･:*✿

Yunho always used violence as the last resort in any situation that involved criminal activity. And although you knew who he was and what he did, he preferred to have you know as little as possible about his job and to not see any of it. He'd rather you not be in danger or get so scared that you'd leave him.

He tried to keep you as hidden as possible, but eventually rivals found out about you and sent someone to stalk you out. Feeling overconfident one day, the man cornered you in an alley, pushing you up against a wall.

"So you're Yunho's little bitch is that right?" He smirked, looking you up and down.

You tried to push him away, disgusted and terrified of him, but he just held you in place.

"I love it when girls like you put up a fight. Makes it even more exciting when I'm destroying their little pussies."

You were in the verge of crying, when you felt his weight pulled away from you. Opening your eyes, you saw Yunho's men holding the guy down, Yunho himself standing over him.

"You're going to regret calling my girl a bitch and daring to put your filthy hands on her."

He whispered instructions in one of his men's ears and they took the man away, ready to deal with him as he deserved. Yunho turned his attention back to you. He cupped your cheeks and held you close.

"Baby I'm so so sorry. I swear to you, I won't let anything like that happen again."

✿*:･ﾟ𝓚𝓪𝓷𝓰 𝓨𝓮𝓸𝓼𝓪𝓷𝓰 ﾟ･:*✿

Your new coworker had really been getting on your nerves lately. He was the type who couldn't take no for an answer, even after you said you had a boyfriend and even kept a picture of you and Yeosang together in your office.

Since he never went past asking you out or pestering you, you couldn't quite escalate it to your supervisor. So you just tried to avoid him at all costs. Yeosang asked you once if you wanted him to get involved.

"It's not that serious. Besides, I'm sure you have more important things to deal with than my tiny annoying problem." You joked with him.

Taking your hand, he placed a gentle kiss on it.

"Nothing is more important than you."

You really thought Yeosang wouldn't get involved. But one day he decided to go pick you up at your workplace. He was glad, and so were you, that he decided to come. Your coworker decided to take things up a notch and actually press you against your desk.

"Don't worry about your stupid boyfriend. It'll be our little secret."

Yeosang slammed the door open, rage pouring out of his body. His presence itself was intimidating that your coworker quickly stepped aside from you.

"Baby, would you mind waiting outside for me?" Yeosang sweetly asked you, but you knew there was anything but sweetness in what he was going to do.

You nodded your head and went outside, closing the door behind you, the last thing you saw was Yeosang walking up to your coworker, who had terror all over his face.

"Looks like you and me are going to have a little 'chat' about respect and why you should stay away from my girlfriend."

✿*:･ﾟ𝓒𝓱𝓸𝓲 𝓢𝓪𝓷 ﾟ･:*✿

You were patiently waiting for San to arrive. He told you he was going to be a little late to your date. It didn't bother you as you were currently holding Byeol, playing around with her on the bench. It wasn't unusual for you guys to bring her along on your dates. After all, she was your guys' little baby.

"That's a really pretty cat you have there."

You looked up and found a young man smiling down at you. You thanked him and he bent down, asking you permission to pet her, which you allowed him to. He didn't seem dangerous.

"What's its name?" He asked as he ruffled the cat's ears, which apparently Byeol didn't seem to really like, evident by her squirming around too much.

"Her name is Byeol." You answered him as you tried to calm Byeol down.

"Very pretty name for such a pretty pussy."

You almost gagged at his use of that word and were taken aback when he placed his hand on your thigh.

"Makes me wonder if her owner's pussy is just as pretty."

You were about to tell him off, but a voice beat you to it.

"It most definitely is."

The man was briskly pulled up by none other than your boyfriend San, who was not at all happy.

"Unfortunately for you, you'll never find out. Now I suggest you just walk away. I don't want to cause a scene in such a public place, especially not in front of my two babies."

The guy simply nodded and walked away when he caught sight of San's gun poking out from his jacket.

"That guy was such a creep. No wonder Byeol instantly didn't like him." You scoffed.

San smiled. "She's always been a good judge of character."

✿*:･ﾟ𝓢𝓸𝓷𝓰 𝓜𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓲 ﾟ･:*✿

You scrolled through your phone as you waited for Mingi to come out of the building. It wasn't unusual for you to know about what he did. One time you literally walked in on him beating a man half to death. Those kinds of things didn't surprise you anymore. Besides, you knew underneath that deadly mafia leader mask, your boyfriend was an actual baby and softie for you.

You weren't a part of his business, however his subordinates knew who you were and thus treated you with utmost respect, because no one dared to face Mingi's wrath if he found out any of them tried anything on you.

"What's a pretty girl like you doing out here so alone?"

You turned to find a sharply dressed man next to you. You saw the familiar crest on his suit jacket, signaling he worked for your boyfriend. But he must be a rookie since you've never seen him before and he had the audacity to talk to you like that.

"I'm not alone. Simply waiting for my boyfriend." You responded nonchalantly, hoping he'd go away.

"Playing hard to get are we now?" He stepped closer to you, his fingers grazing your hair ever so slightly.

Stepping away, you turned to face him with a glare.

"I really suggest you don't get any funny ideas and just walk away while you still have the chance."

The man chuckled at your warning, you however just kept a straight face.

"Come on doll face. Why don't you let me show you a good time?"

The sound of a gun cocking was the only thing heard after he finished his sentence. The frightened look on his face was unmistakable as he felt the barrel of the gun pressed to the back of his head. The fright turned to pure panic when an all too familiar voice said:

"You should have taken her advice when you had the chance."

The man started mumbling out apologies, absolutely terrified of Mingi ending him. Mingi decided to have some pity on him after looking over at your concerned face. He quickly put his gun away before ordering the men behind him to escort the rookie back inside.

You knew Mingi wouldn't let the guy off so easily though.

"Don't be too hard on him honey. After all, he's new. How could he have known?" You fake pouted as you adjusted Mingi's tie.

Mingi smirked down at you. Grabbing one of your hands, he pressed a chaste kiss on one of your fingers.

"Fine. But I'm making sure that the first rule all new recruits know is to not even look at you."

✿*:･ﾟ𝓙𝓾𝓷𝓰 𝓦𝓸𝓸𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓰 ﾟ･:*✿

Wooyoung had absolutely no chill in his line of work, and he especially had no chill when it came to you. He was the type of leader to kill a man on sight if he caught him staring at you for too long. He had learned to tone it down though. You didn't like seeing his aggresive side and so he tried to keep most of that away from you.

This particular night, he decided to take you out to a bar/nightclub. It was a place that was particularly visited by people in his line of work, which is why if anybody died by the end of the night, no one would be fazed by it.

Wooyoung excused himself from your table and went to the bathroom for a bit. You sipped on your drink and looked around for any familiar faces. You looked up when you felt someone sit down, expecting to see Wooyoung, but instead seeing a complete stranger.

"So.... how much?" Was the only thing he asked.

"I- I'm sorry?" You didn't understand what he was asking.

The guy rolled his eyes.

"How much for spending the night with you?"

You couldn't believe this. He actually thought you were one of the prostitutes that worked in these types of places.

"Excuse me?" You scoffed, completely disgusted by him.

"Oh come on now. You don't look like you'd be so expensive for a whore-"

He was cut off by Wooyoung's hand that pulled him out of the booth.

"She's not a whore you dirty motherfucker. You certainly have a lot of balls to come up and disrespect her like that."

Wooyoung scoffed before reaching into his pocket and pulling out his gun.

"Don't worry, I'll fix it right now."

He pushed the guy back into the seat and moved you away from there.

"Close your eyes babygirl, I don't want you to see this."

You obeyed immediately. The sound of the gun blasting and the guy's piercing scream is was enough for you already.

"Keep them closed until I tell you to." Wooyoung whispered in your ear as he guided you out of the bar.

✿*:･ﾟ𝓒𝓱𝓸𝓲 𝓙𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓱𝓸 ﾟ･:*✿

You were well aware that Jongho had many enemies. Being one of the youngest mafia bosses in the city, not to mention the most successful, he had a lot of people wanting to end him. That never happened though. He was too strong, not just he himself physically, but his whole organization was practically unbeatable.

You've had a couple moments where you'd run into one of his rivals. Nothing your doting boyfriend couldn't handle. He was always around to make sure not 1 hair on your head was touched.

Finally having some free time, Jongho decided to take you out and show you off. He stepped aside for a moment to take a call and when you were alone, someone approached you.

"Did you come here alone?"

You shook your head. "No. I'm here with my boyfriend."

The man chuckled. "Really? And where is this boyfriend? I don't see him."

"Why don't you turn around?"

You and the man both looked up at Jongho standing there.

"Now you see him." Jongho had a fake smile plastered on his face.

The man clicked his tongue in annoyance.

"Choi Jongho......guess there wasn't much to see."

At his insult, a few of Jongho's men stood up immediately, ready to end the man if necessary. At the same time, the other guy's men stood up as well. Didn't take long for you to figure out he was an enemy of your boyfriend.

Jongho actually stood there calmly, raising a hand signaling his men to back down.

"Let's not make a spectacle in front of my lady all right?"

Jongho took your hand and placed you behind him, tucking you away for safety. He then proceeded to roll up his sleeves.

"Besides, we're grown men.....so let's settle this like men.....just us two."

Gifs not mine, credit goes to their respective owners.

[junko-and-riri-domain]

❦ comfort & cuddles | psh

↬ ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: park sunghoon x reader

↬ ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: boyfriend!sunghoon | angst bc of reader’s feelings | fluff bc hoonie comforts reader

↬ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs: exhaustion | not eating enough food | implies past self-harm | (if there are any other warnings that I missed please let me know just to be safe)

↬ ɴᴏᴛᴇ:

i procrastinated on my own essay by writing this so not my best writing

I have a very strong dislike for school rn & just want hoonie cuddles :(

if you’re a reader of the tatts & cupcakes series there’ll (hopefully) be a new chapter posted sometime later this week/next week but idk for sure yet

Your mind started to enter a sort of haze as the effects of staring at a screen all day started to set in. Exhaustion was the only way to describe what you were feeling due to approaching deadlines and assignments that were starting to pile. Your tendency to procrastinate only worsened things and now you were stuck dealing with the consequences. Your eyes met the numbers on the upper right corner of your laptop, 2:12 am which meant that you’ve been working on the essay all day. Technically, all day yesterday and 2 hours into today since it was now a new day. So many hours spent with music playing in the background, the tips of your fingers constantly tapping the letter of the keyboard, constantly racking your brain for what to write. Yet…

 There. Was. No. Progress. Whatsoever. 

All you had since you started working on the damn assignment was your name, date, and title. Whatever your mind seemed to think of and the words that formed as a result of it just didn’t feel good enough. But if you were being honest, nothing really felt good enough anymore.

Constantly waking up, attending the same classes, receiving more and more work, just when did life get to this point? One minute you were a kid carefree and worried about what toppings to get on your fro-yo when the next minute you were grown up with a crap ton of responsibilities on you and a complete lack in time management. Hell, you even started skipping lunch hour because of all the things you needed to do. It reached a point where you skipped one lunch and came to the realization that eating just wasn’t actually all that important because you could get by on the little you did eat for breakfast. As for dinner, well, you were too exhausted to get up and make something so you either ordered in or just headed straight to bed. You didn���t exactly know what came over you as your fist met your desk, your head leaning back into your chair and eyes meeting the ceiling of your room. You had a tendency to want to hit things when stressed and while hitting something wasn’t the best way to deal with anything it was better than what you used to do. As you brought up your hand to put it over your forehead, your eyes glanced at the marks that served as a constant reminder of who you used to be.

Hitting your desk once in a while was definitely better than what you used to do.

Maybe it was the frustration of your mind not being capable enough to answer the damn essay prompt.

Maybe it was because you were hungry but getting up felt too exhausting.

Maybe it was because caffeine just didn’t feel like it was doing its job lately.

With clammy hands and nails digging into your skin, breathing that you started losing control of, you cried. You didn’t know how long you sat there, tears streaming down your face and breathing that you eventually lost control of. It wasn’t until a pair of arms were wrapped around you, enveloping you in a warmth trademarked by your boyfriend, Park Sunghoon that you were brought back to reality. Your tears were wiped away with the soft material of his sleeve and your face slightly grimaced as the taste of a sour candy filled your mouth but it helped you calm down since your senses were now focused on the flavor instead of being overwhelmed about everything going on.

“Y/n,” Sunghoon said softly, almost as if he raised his voice he was scared that he’d break you. Your hands clutched onto his shoulders and your eyes met his to see nothing but pure concern and worry for you.

“W-when’d you, when’d you get here?” you asked, tone wavering and voice shaky.

“I called but you weren’t answering so I got worried,” he answered as his hand smoothened out the top of your hair.

“Crap, Hoonie, I’m sorry. I had my phone on Do Not Disturb,” you muttered. “You should leave, the managers are gonna get mad at you for sneaking out of the dorm.”

“If you think I’m leaving you like this, you’re delusional. Now, c’mon.”

“Where?”

“To bed.” Your eyes widened slightly,

“You’re spending the night here?”

“Only if you want me to.” Did you really want him to spend the night with you?

“What are you gonna be doing?” Pressing a light kiss to the top of your head,

“Comfort and cuddles.”

“I need to finish my essay, Hoonie. It’s due later, I don’t know what the hell I’m gonna do.” He rubbed soothing circles on your back,

“Hey, hey, it’s gonna be ok. If anything we can call up Heeseung or Jungwon to help you, ok? One letter on an essay isn’t worth what’s happening to you right now.” You looked up at him,

“I’m so tired,” you whispered.

“Let me take you to bed?” he asked as more of a question than a statement. You nodded and felt him lifting you up, your back then met the soft impact of the mattress. The blanket was draped over you, then you felt Hoonie’s arms wrap around your waist. Burying your face in the crook of his neck, the man most of his days on the ice but he was warmer than anyone else you ever knew.

“Comfort and cuddles,” you whispered before closing your eyes and allowing yourself to settle in Hoonie’s embrace and warmth.

❦ written by riri | blog master list

ǫᴜɪᴄᴋ ᴄʟɪᴄᴋs ᴛᴏ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ sᴜɴɢʜᴏᴏɴ ғɪᴄs

boys & girls try to pretend | the only thing you’re falling for on my watch is me

[tickly-trashcan]

Sleepovers {Reki, Langa, and Miya}

A/N: Hope you don’t mind, but I decided to merge these two together because I just love the idea of Reki and Langa messing around with Miya hehe. I think this is my first Sk8 fic?? Im so excited to write for this bunch of cute characters, I’ve been itching to try them out. Hope everyone enjoys! :D

Summary: Reki, Langa, and Miya are sleeping over at Reki’s house. They decide to play some video games, but when Miya wins and starts acting smug, how will Reki and Langa react?

Word Count: 1.6k (under the cut)

“I got the chiiiips!” Reki sang, dropping a bag of doritos and a bag of sour cream and onion chips onto the table that was currently already overloaded with goodies and snacks.

Candies, soda, popcorn, everything you could imagine that definitely wasn’t good for you was on that table, and Miya only looked up with Reki with a slight cringe on his face.

“You’re gonna get way sick,” he said, turning his attention back to his little DS, tapping away at the buttons as he cleared level after level.

“Everyone knows if you drink a soda with it it cancels out, right Langa?” Reki said confidently, sitting down on the couch next to Miya and reaching across to fist bump Langa, who hesitantly fist bumped him back.

“I don’t think that’s how it works, but sure,” He said, picking up the remote that sat nestled between a bag of chocolates and a box of gummy worms, turning on the TV.

The three of them had been practicing their skateboarding at the skate park all day, practicing ollies and whatnot until the sun had almost set. Now, they were at Reki’s house, where they planned to sleepover… er, less of a sleepover, and more hanging out. With all that sugar they were about to consume, there was no way they’d be falling asleep anytime soon. 

Reki popped open the bag of sour cream and onion chips and stuffed his hand in, grabbing a few and munching on them before offering them to Miya and Langa. Langa took a handful and ate one at a time while Miya only took one, too focused on his DS game to grab any more.

“Miya, did you bring the switch?”

“I always bring the switch, slime.”

Miya hopped off the couch and dug into his bag, pulling out the console and setting it up on the television set, handing controllers to Reki and Langa before sitting down between them, his own controller in hand.

“What games do you have?” Langa asked as Miya switched from the cable to the switch on the television set with the remote, shrugging.

“I have stuff like Animal Crossing and Super Mario, but we should probably play Mario Kart or something, since those are multiplayer games.”

“What’s the difference between Super Mario and Mario Kart?” Reki asked curiously, and Miya scoffed.

“Of course a slime like you wouldn’t know the difference.”

“Hey!”

Miya grinned smugly as he booted up the game and Reki grumbled, turning to Langa who only shrugged. Langa reached for the box of gummy worms, taking a few and popping them in his mouth, Reki reaching for the chocolates.

“Which buttons do I press?” Langa asked, inspecting the controller.

“Nothing right now, but this button helps you accelerate and you steer with the joystick,” Miya explained, pointing at the controller as Langa nodded. He showed it to Reki as well and they selected their characters and karts, Miya finally starting the race once they were all ready.

They took off, Miya almost immediately taking first place while Langa and Reki struggled to stay anywhere close to him. Reki and Langa moved their controllers around as they moved, strained looks on their faces while Miya remained completely calm and just moved his thumbs on the controller, easily retaining his winning spot.

“How are you so good at this?!” Langa cried out, running into a wall.

“He’s probably cheating!” Reki whined, getting hit by a red shell.

“I’m not cheating, I’m just better than you slimes,” Miya said cockily, and Reki sent him a glare, which turned out to be a mistake as he got stuck in last place. He groaned in frustration as Miya chuckled, taking first easily as Langa came in seventh, with Reki in dead last.

Miya looked at Reki and Langa one at a time, the same cocky grin on his face as he looked at them before he reached to the table, pulling out a few chips and munching on them, the grin never leaving his face. 

Reki glared at Miya as he started the next race, and an idea popped into Reki’s head. He glanced over at Langa and winked at him, Miya too busy focusing on winding up his kart, and Langa looked at Reki confused. Reki pointed at Miya and winked twice, hoping that Langa would catch on, but the race was already underway, and Langa was now too busy trying to catch up to Miya to figure out what Reki had been suggesting.

Langa weaved through racers, obviously having learned from the previous race and was now right behind Miya. Miya looked over at Langa quickly before throwing a banana behind him that he had been saving, knocking Langa out who groaned in frustration.

“That was just rude!” Langa said, trying to regain his second place status and failing.

Miya only chuckled, and Reki decided to put his plan into action. He waited until he was at a part of the race where he was going straight, not needing to steer, and reached over to scribble his hand up Miya’s side. Miya squeaked, jumping up and nearly dropping his controller. A few people passed him, including Langa who now took first place, grinning happily from ear to ear. 

“Okay, now that was cheating!” Miya complained, quickly catching up to Langa once more when he felt a prod at his other side from Langa. Miya squealed, twisting away and falling behind again, now Reki having passed him. Miya grumbled, trying to catch up but only managing to squeak and flail as Langa and Reki poked him every so often.

The race eventually finished, Langa in first, Reki in second, and Miya in dead last. Miya puffed his cheeks and turned to Reki, pointing an accusatory finger at him.

“You’re such a cheater! I totally would’ve beaten you slimes if you didn’t cheat!”

“Hmm, but you still lost Miya… Do you know what happens when you lose~?” Reki sang, wiggling his fingers at Miya. Miya started to back away from Reki, only bumping into Langa, who was also wiggling his fingers.

“Grab him.”

Miya was about to jump off the couch and run but Langa already had his hands on Miya’s hips, squeezing as he pulled him back down, making him squeak. As soon as he was back on the couch Langa hooked his arms under Miya’s, holding them up and exposing Miya’s torso. Reki grinned, pouncing on the dark-haired boy as his screeching laughter immediately began to echo throughout the room.

“STAHAhahahap! Stuhuhuhupid slime! Let me gohohoho!”

“This is what happens when you lose to a bunch of slimes!” Reki teased, scribbling his fingers all over Miya’s ribs, poking and prodding between each one as Miya kicked his legs around, nearly hitting Reki.

“Whoa there, almost hit me!” Reki said, grabbing Miya’s legs and squeezing his knees, only making him kick more as he cackled.

“Not thehehehehere! I hahahahate you!” Miya wailed, Reki traveling back to Miya’s torso and digging his hands under his arms, making Miya squawk as he kicked furiously, knocking Reki in the gut. 

“Oof! Alright, you asked for it!”

Reki got up slightly positioning Miya’s legs in a leglock, sitting down on them so he couldn’t kick anymore. Langa let go of Miya, who instantly started to try and claw at Reki before Langa buried his hands under Miya’s arms, making him screech and fall back against the blue-haired skater.

“NOHOhohoho! Not yohohohohou too!” Miya exclaimed, squirming from side to side and flopping like a fish out of water as Langa continued to scribble under his arms as Miya practically screamed with mirth.

“Tickle tickle, Miya,” Langa teased, his voice sounding unenthused despite the huge, amused grin on his face as Miya thrashed beneath him, his face bright pink as Reki grabbed onto his socked foot, scribbling up and down as Miya yelled.

“NahahahaHAHAHA!! Reheheheki, not thehehehere!”

“You’ll say that no matter where we tickle you! Langa, try his tummy!”

“Ahahahahanywhere but thehehere!” Miya wailed, but Langa didn’t listen. He raised his hands above Miya, who squeaked in fear through his hysterical laughter. Finally, Langa’s fingers dove down, clawing at his tummy as Miya shrieked loudly, bucking wildly and laughing harder than before if that was even possible.

“Wow, looks like someone’s got a ticklish tummy!” Reki teased from his spot as he switched back to kneading Miya’s knees as he tried to kick his legs and get away from the horrible sensations, but he couldn’t. 

“LEHEHeheheave me alohohoHONE! Stuhuhupid slimes!” Miya cackled, his face almost red now as tears started to trickle down his cheeks from the sheer intensity of the tickling.

Langa slowed his fingers on Miya’s tummy, now just tracing light circles as he looked over at Reki.

“Think he’s had enough?” Langa asked, slightly concerned with how Miya was wheezing and laughing as hard as he was.

Reki glanced over at the feline-like boy, who was clearly exhausted by the tickling he had just endured. Reki shrugged and nodded, figuring he had definitely sustained more tickling than needed and got off of him, Miya panting heavily between them.

“Y-You two are the wohorst,” he said, a few giggles still escaping his lips as he laid between Langa and Reki, who only chuckled at him. Langa ruffled his hair and Reki poked his tummy a few more times, making Miya whine.

“Let’s play one more round, and no cheating this time!” Miya finally said, picking up his controller. Reki and Langa nodded, picking up theirs as well before Miya started their final race, winner takes all!

[a-cupof-jo]

Pitcher’s Plate

Y/n loves baseball. Has since she was a child. After giving it up her freshman year, she never thought she would play competitively again. That is until baseball star and long time friend Jung Jaehyun needs her help.

High School Baseball Star!Jaehyun x childhoodfriend!reader

friends to lovers 

Words: 2.9k

Warning(s): a few swear words, baseball inaccuracies

~~

In through the nose.

Out through the mouth.

Elbow aligned.

Back Straight.

Don’t freeze up.

Just breath.

You wind up, adrenaline running through your veins.

You lunge forward and release.

~

You gasped as the sound went through the park. Jung Jaehyun had never been an idiot. Everyone knew that the school’s star pitcher was smart and quick on his feet. Usually, that knowledge was used more on the field and less in the classroom, but this time you weren’t sure as his bat clattered to the ground. His face twisted with pain as he held his arm to his chest. It’s broken.

That idiot blocked the baseball flying for his head with his arm.

Taeil, the assistant coach, jumped out of the ball pit and ran towards home plate as the umpire called for a time out. Your view of their conversation was blocked by none other than Kim Doyoung. The raven haired baseball captain quickly joined their conversation.

You gave up trying to see Jaehyun and looked out to see the other pitchers team gathered. Kim Mingyu is easily Jaehyun’s biggest rival. Ever since freshman year both Jaehyun and Mingyu had been starting pitchers for their respective schools. Your blood boiled as you saw the smug look laced across Mingyu’s face. Of course he did it on purpose. Bottom of the last inning, down 2 to 3, and our star pitcher, one of our last chances for winning, down and out. You were half way out of your seat when a hand grabbed your forearm.

“Go Jaehyun! You’ve got it.” you glared at Jungwoo and looked back at the park just in time to see Jaehyun throw a single finger jester at us. You thought you heard a couple of girls gasp. Their image of kind, calm star pitcher Jaehyun completely shattered. Doyoung shook his head in amusement. Jungwoo shrugged and tried to hold in his laughter. After knowing the three of them for over 11 years, you knew a little teasing would be fine, but concern slipped back to the front of your mind.

Jaehyun threw his good hand up at what Taeil said. Words spilled out of his mouth and Taeil pointed to the dugout. He continued speaking and threw his hand to first base.

“That idiot,” you muttered as he kicked his bat away and stalked to first base. You watched as Taeil and Doyoung exchanged a look. Taeil sighed and picked up Jaehyun’s bat making his way to the dugout.

Doyoung took his place at the batting mound. While he didn’t seem like the athletic type, Doyoung always surprised others. He wasn’t the best on the team, but he had a natural way of leading others and knew how to play in order to win. There were two people on the bases, Jaehyun and Mark. Doyoung just needed to hit it far enough to get Mark to score a run. They could tie up the game. You watched as Doyoung swung one strike, then a second. Miraculously, the third pitch connected with his bat and the ball was sent flying. The crowd yelled as the players shot across the bases. Mark hit home plate as Jaehyun came around third. The baseball flew back towards infield. Taeil yelled for Jaehyun to stop, but Jaehyun didn’t listen. He raced for home plate trying to beat the ball. Chaos sounded as Jaehyun slid forward and a ball hit the catcher’s mit.  

“Safe,” the umpire called. The crowd went in an uproar, but you couldn’t look away from where Jaehyun lay his arm tucked between his chest and knees.

~~

You stormed through the crowd. “Excuse me,” you heard an indignant scoff from behind you. Jungwoo was by your side. His tall frame looked over the crowd, leading you towards Jaehyun.

“Weren’t we amazing,” you hear Jaehyun crooned as you slip through a gap of people.

Jungwoo smiled and hugged Doyoung, “You were both spectacular."

"I don’t think that’s the word I would use,” Taeil greeted from behind the two. He frowned at Jaehyun. “I’m not happy with the fact that you went against what I suggested.”

“Like you just said,” Jaehyun grinned. “It was a suggestion."

Taeil frowned, “I don’t wanna be the one explaining to your father why you didn’t come off the field.” He nodded as Mr. Jung walked up to talk to the head coach. Taeil sighed as he walked towards the two.

“You know y/n,” Jungwoo spoke with a slight lith. “You should fill in for Jaehyun.” You stood still. The last time you had played competitively was freshman year. You had made it on the high schools varsity softball team as a pitcher. You guys had gone to state, but in the last game you froze. You couldn’t throw a pitch. The team had lost and you walked away from competitive baseball, permanently. You couldn’t join the boys team as a pitcher. Besides, the coach and the boys wouldn’t let you.

“No way in hell,” Doyoung stepped in. “Y/n cannot join the boys baseball team. Especially not as a pitcher."

You started to defend yourself, but Jungwoo had already called over Taeil.

"Taeil, don’t you think y/n would make a great pitcher in place of Jaehyun?”

Taeil stared at you for a second before nodding, “It would be a difficult transition to the men’s team, but y/n has the skill."

Doyoung grunted at Taeil’s words. He went to insert his 2 cents when a voice spoke. "Jaehyun,” Mr. Jung rested a hand on the shoulder of the uninjured arm. “Come on. We need to get that looked at as soon as possible.” Jaehyun’s face fell as he looked down at his arm.

“Hey, chin up,” you grin. “Now you can focus on other things, like your school work. I thought I heard Ms. Joy say something about some missing work from you."

Jaehyun shot a glowering look at you. You grinned and blew a kiss at him. He promptly grabbed it out of the air before throwing it to the ground a grin now on his face. You smiled back at him as he walked away. You turned back to your friends as a look passed between them.

"What?” You tilt your head.

“Nothing,” Jungwoo sang. He wrapped an arm around you before pointing at Doyoung. “We still on for tomorrow?"

Doyoung nodded as he walked away, "I’ll see you both tomorrow.” He turned to walk backwards, “10 am. Don’t be late.”

~~

You loved the small ball park. As a kid, you, Doyoung, Jaehyun, and Jungwoo would come down on Saturdays and practice throwing, catching, and hitting. The tradition continued as you guys got older, eventually Jaehyun and Doyoung started to invite a few guys to play small scrimmages. Jungwoo walked next to you as you entered. Doyoung stood stretching his limbs. “You’re late.”

“Only by a few minutes,” you check your watch, seeing 10:07 flash across. Jaehyun sat on a bench nearby, his arm wrapped in a cast. “Hey, sunshine,” you sit next to him taking note of the splotchy skin and bags under his eyes. “Rough night? How’s the arm?”

“Fractured. Of course we couldn’t figure that out right away because my dad wanted to go to Urgent Care instead of the ER,” he sighed.

“Hey there’s nothing wrong with urgent care.”

He shook his head, “I’m not saying there is, but there is a problem when he gets lost, can’t find it, and refuses to use a GPS. I had to wait another hour and a half after the game to even see a doctor”

You cringe, “I’m sorry.” He gave you a sad smile. A sting came from your back and you yelped, “Hey!”

“Come on, we need our pitcher!” Doyoung stood at the home plate. You glared at him.

“I thought you didn’t want me as your pitcher,” you brought up the conversation from the night before. You wave as you notice Yuta and Winwin standing at two of the bases. It was nice to see some of the team out playing recreationally. “But, now you do? Make up your mind. Am I good or not?”

Doyoung ignored your malice, “You’re not a bad pitcher, y/n. You know that.” He watched you as you stood at the pitcher mound. “I just don’t want you on my team.”

You rolled your eyes. “Just because you’re the captain doesn’t mean you own the team.”

“Can we just play, please,” Jungwoo spoke up from the third base.

You grinned at him. Turning to Doyoung you adjusted your grip on the ball. You could easily strike him out with a few curve balls. It was your best pitch. You’d perfected it at a young age. Since your older brother, Taeyong, also played baseball he took it upon himself to teach you everything he knows, and you’re thankful for it. You knew he was never devoted to the sport like you are, but he had a natural talent for it. Before Jaehyun was the star, it was Taeyong. You loved your older brother. Expectations were high for you. Everyone thought that you were going to be the queen of softball. Between being best friends with Jaehyun and Doyoung, and having Taeyong as an older brother you knew you had to be the best. The pressure was too great and when push came to shove you broke. So, despite your gut telling you to become the next varsity pitcher, you decided not to. You pull your arm back before letting the ball fly. Strike one.

~~

Crushes are weird things. You can never be certain the other person reciprocates your feelings. You also can’t be sure that it won’t ruin a friendship. You’ve known Jaehyun since he moved across the street from you when you were five. Through every period of life you’ve grown with him. When the summer after sophomore year started, so did another period of life. Jaehyun had always been a handsome kid, you’ve thought that your entire life, and the pictures you have from your childhood prove that. When you had entered high school, you noticed that other people also noticed Jaehyun’s looks. It didn’t bother you. Jaehyun could like whomever he wanted. Until, you realized that you also started noticing Jaehyun. Not only for his looks, but also for his kind heart. And how he always smelled so nice.

Why did he have to smell so nice? You tried not to breathe deeply as he stood close to you. “Show me how you pitch.”

“Why,” you broke out of your reverie. The two of you stood in the middle of the playing field after the scrimmage was over and everyone had gone home.

He shrugged, “I just want to show you something.” You frown before preparing to throw. “Stop,” he put his hand on your shoulder. “When you’re preparing to throw you need to make sure you keep your back straight,” he pulled back on your shoulder. “We can’t have you slouching like an old lady.”

“I thought you were trying to help.”

“I am,” he grinned. “Now show me what it looks like when you throw it.” You rock forward to throw it and he stops your arm before you release, “You need to keep your elbow in line with your body. Here,” he stepped up behind you and adjusted your arm. “You’re a great pitcher but your form is terrible. I guess Taeyong can only teach you so much.” he quieted.

“And what does my form have to do with anything,” you asked, standing up straight. “It doesn’t matter if I’m only playing recreationally.”

Jeahyun took a deep breath and stepped in front of you. “It matters because,” he looked you straight in the eye. “I want you to try out as the new pitcher.”

~~

“Don’t you dare try out.”

“I’m having a great day. Thank you for asking.” You close your locker. Doyoung stood next to you.

Doyoung frowned, “I’m serious, y/n. Don’t try out today.”

“How did you even know that I was thinking about trying out today,” you crossed your arms. Doyoung shrugged but his eyes moved down the hall to where Jaehyun stood. “Don’t worry Doyoung I’m not trying to upstage you. I won’t be trying to get into your guys testosterone party.” You turned and walked to your next class. It was going to be a long day. Tryouts were after lunch, which was after this class. Even though you brought your gear you were still trying to decide if you actually wanted to join tryouts.

“I don’t get why he’s so adamant about me not trying out,” you confided in Jaehyun as both walked towards the lunch room. “I know that I can make it through.”

“He does too,” Jaehyun stopped as you opened your locker. “That’s what he’s afraid of. That you’ll actually make the team and then when it matters you’ll freeze.”

“So he doesn’t believe in me,” you turned. At Jaehyun’s hesitation, you felt yourself heat up. Slamming the door shut, you stormed to lunch. It doesn’t take you long to see him. His back was towards you as he conversed with Jungwoo. You saw a variety of emotions filter across his face. He pointed at you. Doyoung turned and stood as you approached him. “I can’t believe you! You think that I’ll freeze up.”

“Who told you?”

You rolled your eyes.

“I knew I shouldn’t have told Jaehyun.”

“So it’s true you think that I’m going to freeze up,” you felt tears sting your eyes. “Screw you, Kim Dongyoung. That happened once.” You turned on your heel slipping past Jaehyun. You rushed towards the locker room. You don’t need his approval. You’re going to tryout if not for anything more than to spit, Kim Dongyoung.

~~

You looked up as you heard people walk in. The current team made their way through the room. Jaemin, the current relief pitcher, stopped as he spotted you, “You’re a girl.”

“What gave it away,” you spat. Jaehyun stood next to you grinning.

“Are you sure you want to be trying out for a guys team?” Jaemin raised his eyebrow.

You glared at him, “What are you insinuating.”

He raised his hands, “I’m just calling it like I see it.” He leaned forward, “And you look like you’re about to be eaten alive.”

You gulped slightly as he grinned and walked out of the room. “Don’t worry about him. All the guys are harmless.” You tried to give Jaehyun a confident grin, but you went so sure. Even Yuta and Winwin, whom you played with on the weekends, seemed intimidating right now. “Just go out and show ‘em what you got.” You stood and wiped your hands on your pants. Grabbing your mit you gave Jaehyun a small smile. He smiled back, “Good luck.”

You kept to yourself as you warm up. Taeil walked by and gave your shoulder a squeeze. “You’re going to do great. You’ve got the former pitcher vouching for. Coach values Jaehyun’s opinion.” You took a breath as confidence filled you.

You stopped as Jaemin moved in front of you, “I’m sorry but I was warming up here first.” You told him with as much authority as possible.

“I’m actually on the team,” he crossed his arms.

You started to tell him off when a voice called out, “Jaemin, come warm up with me!” you looked over to see a shorter tan boy you recognized as the second baseman wave him over. He smiled as he saw you look over at him. Jaemin frowned and stalked away.

You took a deep breath as Taeil called you over. Stepping up to the mound you looked over to see Jaehyun sitting in the stands. Taeil stood ready to track your ball speed.  You paused as you watched Jaehyun give you the sign to throw a four seam fastball. You gave him a confused look to which he re-signed a four seam fastball. Maybe he thought that pitch  was better than your curveball. In this moment, you had to trust. You adjusted your grip on the ball.

Straight back.

Elbow aligned.

Lunge and release.

The ball thudded against the catcher, Kun’s glove.

Taeil stared down at the number. “83 mph.”

That’s fast. That’s really fast. You knew that you had a fast pitch but to be at the top of the average for high school guys.

Shit.

You are damn fine.

~~

Your heart hammered as you walked through the room. The tension was different. After the coach called you last night, you knew that you had to wait to tell your parents. Jaehyun already knew. You couldn’t tell Jungwoo. You weren’t sure if Doyoung knew. The two of you hadn’t spoken a word to each other since the afternoon before. After today, you weren’t sure the two of you would ever be friends again.

You stepped into the light and walked towards the group of boys that stood facing Taeil and the coach. Taeil smiled as he saw you approach. “Okay team, I’m sure you all are anxious to know who your new pitcher for the rest of the season will be,” Taeil glanced down at the clipboard in his hands. “We saw a lot of promising talent yesterday, but had to make a decision. So in addition to Jaemin I would like to introduce the new pitcher. Please make her feel welcome,” he gestured to you. You felt frozen as all eyes turned toward you.  “Y/n y/l/n.”

~~

*Reposted from previos blog*

~~

Tag list: @qianinterprises @stayctday