#and maybe with A LOT OF LUCK AND BULLYING FROM US something will ACTUALLY HAPPEN between them XD

[howthesleeplesswander]

Spring's steps remained lively at Kaz's side, oblivious as ever to the cyclical ruminations of her companion—which was a blessing for both of them, really. If she knew the internal turmoil she'd unleashed, she surely would have been too flustered to face this meeting with any amount of decorum.

"That is true, I suppose," she agreed, but there was a hesitation in her tone on which she couldn't help but elaborate. Talking helped stifle the resurgent flutter in her rib cage when he once again acclaimed her skill. "For arrangements like this, however—" she patted the pocket where she'd stashed the sample paintings, "—there are many factors about the location worth considering. The color palette of the decor, for example, or the size of the tables and rooms where they will be displayed. Even the overall air of the establishment is crucial to understand. One would not furnish a funeral parlor with tulips and sunflowers."

In truth, Spring could happily chatter about the finer details of designing flower arrangements for hours on end, but Kaz was spared from such a fate by their destination appearing after the next corner they rounded. All at once, her excitement for the meeting dissipated in a rush, replaced by ridiculous disappointment that Spring tried her best to suppress.

Surely Kaz had a dozen other more important matters to attend with the remainder of his day. It was unfair of her to wish to monopolize more of his time, yet still, she found herself sad to have to part. Admittedly it wasn't a new feeling (a fact that she would be embarrassed to admit), but it was one that had grown stronger as of late, whenever she found herself in Kaz's company and had to inevitably leave it again.

But she fought to not let it show on her face, especially after he encouraged her newfound confidence. Before she could respond with some practiced modesty, however, she was once again caught off-guard by his rushed promise.

"Oh! Really? Are you sure?" She hadn't even considered the need to walk back through the Barrel after the meeting. Goodness, at least one of them was thinking ahead. And just like that, her previous excitement flooded back—more so directed now at the impending walk home than for the client she was about to face.

"Thank you," she said again with her smile in full force. "I will try not to keep you waiting long." Pausing outside the entrance, Spring smoothed out her hair and skirt from any ruffling that may have occurred while traveling through bustling streets. Also taking the opportunity to psych herself up one last time, her companion's encouragement returned to her once more, bolstering her with determination:

If Kaz has confidence in me, then I have nothing to fear.

With eyes alight, she brought her fists up to her chest and bounced on her feet. "All right, here I go—wish me luck!" A final grin and wave over her shoulder were parting gifts before she took the plunge into the House of the White Rose.

She expected more out of him. And that was wrong for a multitude of reasons, though mainly two came to mind: 1) He couldn’t give her that. Or “shouldn’t” might have been more apt. And it wasn’t the first time he’d taken a few steps down a road like this only to conclude that road wasn’t meant for him, no different than a comfy, law-abiding lifestyle fit Dirtyhands; 2) Spring would only expect more if she wanted more, and of all the insanity Kaz had faced since he’d first walked these dangerous, dense streets, that had to be the most unbelievable. He wondered what was the denser in this case: the streets, Spring for desiring his approval, or himself for even exercising any one of these ideas.

But he wasn’t some sorry drunkard staggering about the lively night in a stupor. . . . Kaz looked for signs in everything, remained vigilant in a place where the great majority weren’t. And so, when he caught that trace of disappointment in Spring’s tone, a festering doubt muddying the edges of what was usually so bright and cheerful, he didn’t just shrug it off and move on. (Even if part of him figured he really ought to.)

He snatched it. He copied it down in permanent ink: erratic scribbles of a man willing to drive himself insane because of one look. One word. One change in one woman. And was the irony of how stupidly simple this was—how so many men found themselves on their knees for that one woman—lost on him? Of course not. Kaz just chose to ignore it.

Really, he’d told her what someone in her shoes would want to hear (while still being entirely honest about it): Your client will appreciate your work. That was the goal. That was the whole purpose for her being here tonight, interrupted only by Kaz stepping in to lead the blind through these treacherous streets where he had, once upon a time, been just as blind himself. Logically speaking, that should’ve delighted her. That should have been enough.

But. She’d wanted more.

And only when Kaz amended his statement to express appreciation did Spring’s smile return—

It shouldn’t have. His opinion shouldn’t matter to her. Just like his opinion mattering to her shouldn’t matter to him. But it did. In both instances. And Kaz felt like he was left staring again at a closed, but oh-so-familiar door. Staring. Watching. Waiting. As if that door would just swing open all on its own, as if he didn’t need to turn the handle and walk through the damned thing himself to actually progress.

He was never keen on using the front door, however.

“Flowers are flowers regardless of where they happen to be displayed,” Kaz noted when Spring joined him again. His attention swiveled past her, carefully eyeing a few shadowed corners for any sign of movement. (The only podge willing to jump him of all people would either be an idiot or a new face, but Kaz wasn’t discounting the possibility—particularly when he had Spring with him.) “Don’t doubt your skills simply because the establishment’s not your usual . . . speed.”

Speaking of which—and regrettably—the House of the White Rose came into view at another turn, its ivory facade like a blot of white ink on a gray canvas. Kaz felt his shoulders drop, posture momentarily slackening before he cast Spring another glance. Her newfound excitement coaxed a twitch to the corner of his lips. “See? Now keep that energy.” It suits you better than that earlier doubt, at least. “And show Felix that he’s going to need to scrape up a lot of kruge for your services. He has no excuse when his coffers are full.”

His pace slowed again as they neared the entrance, and he oscillated outside the parlor while weighing his choices. “I’ll wait out here.” The promise came out faster than he meant it to, forcing him to hesitate and control himself—for pity’s sake—before saying more. “Assuming you plan on going home when this is done . . . ?”

[skylarmoon71]

Amazon (Smallville) : Short Story - Chapter 1

“Why me.” 

Diana warned you to lay low. 

When she brought you here, you promised that you would be on your best behavior. Maybe she just saw something in you that was similar to herself when she was young. 

That’s why you made a promise to always make her proud. 

That was a bit difficult given your temper. 

Being an amazon probably didn’t help. 

Despite all that, you tried your hardest to stay out of trouble. You got great grades. You kept your friend group small. You tried to blend in the best you could and avoid being anywhere in the vicinity of those guys. 

“Chloe Sullivan, Clark Kent, (Y/N) Prince.” 

The second you heard the call for groups, you could feel your annoyance rise. Clark sent you a smile, in which you returned with a glare. He raised a brow, looking away awkwardly. 

“Hey Chloe, is it me or is she glaring at us?” 

Chloe looked over to see your frown. 

“It’s just you.” She replied happily. 

You sighed heavily, turning your head as you tried to listen to the instructions for the project. 

It’s not like you hated Clark and his group of friends. It’s just that trouble seemed to follow that crew around. After you almost got suspended for scaring a bully, you were already walking on thin ice. You didn’t want to try your luck, and now you were teamed up with this duo.

Just great.

~

“So I was thinking since Clark is such good friends with a certain billionaire we can just ask him for help. “ 

“Chloe, we can’t just use Lex whenever we get one of these projects.” 

“Come on Clark, what’s the use of having a billionaire in your pocket if you never use him.” 

Sitting in the Talon, they just went back and forth like that for who knows how long. 

You were trying to get through as much of your book as possible. Which was a great distraction from them. 

“Hey, isn’t your mom like a millionaire activist?” 

“She’s not my mother.” 

Your harsh tone caught Chloe's attention, and you clenched your fist to control yourself. 

“You're a brilliant warrior, but your temper is your greatest ail. You need to learn to control it.” 

Diana’s words echoed, and you let out a breath. 

“Let me know what you plan to do.” 

Standing, you started packing away your books as you left. They both watched you walk away. 

“I think I upset her. Family must be a touchy subject.” Chloe states. 

Clark still looks a bit distant. He’s seen you around a lot, but he’s never had an actual conversation. Now that he really thinks back, it feels like you’ve been everywhere that he wasn’t. Given his track record he’s not that surprised. 

That evening when he visits Lex, he can’t help but bring up the conversation. 

“Someone in Smallville that doesn’t like a kent. That’s hard to believe.” Lex teases. Clark looks unamused. 

“I’m serious Lex. It seems like she hates me or something. We have this big project and I’m wondering if we should just get a change of partners.” 

“Well if you do that she’ll definitely hate you.” 

“What, why?” 

“Think about it, she’ll know that you asked for different partners.”

“You’re right.” 

That would definitely make the situation worse. 

“Have you tried talking to her? There might be a reason she dislikes you. Maybe something happened.” 

He can’t remember ever having a negative encounter with you. 

Regardless, it wouldn’t hurt. 

The following day Clark intends to do just that. 

He’d spent the better part of the day trying to track you down. It’s only after the school lets out that he catches sight of you. You’re sitting on the bleachers with your backpack. The field is empty, and it looks like you’re doing homework. 

Now was his chance. 

“Hey!” 

You turn your head, and your expression goes sour the second you see him. Closing your book, you begin packing away your things. Clark stops when he’s standing closer. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.” 

“That’s okay. I was just leaving.” 

You heave the bag on your shoulder, and Clark steps forward, blocking your way. 

“Move.” 

Now he’s sure he isn’t imagining it. The hostility was definitely directed at him. 

“Why don’t you like me?” 

Your frown deepens, because it’s obvious he won’t move until you give him an answer. 

“You have the scent of a god.” 

Clark froze. 

“That’s why I’ve always been weary of you.”

He’s clearly caught off guard. 

“At first I thought I was imagining it. Because I left home, I just assumed I was manifesting it for comfort. But then I spoke to Diana. As it turns out I have a gift for detecting strong beings. You aren’t of this planet, are you?” 

Your speech has changed significantly, and now Clark is the one who is weary. But he’s unsure of what. The fact that you don’t seem afraid that he might be an alien, or that you’re so confident that you know his secret. 

“I don’t know what you mean.” 

His best option is to feign obliviousness. You just smile. One that displays a level of understanding. He has to say, it’s the first time he’s truly seen you wear an expression that isn’t cold or serious. 

“I get why you would try to hide it, we all just want to be normal.” 

You sound a lot more like a high school student now. Clark swallows. 

“I can sense how different you are. Maybe that’s why you get into so many tough situations. Initially I thought you just had bad luck. But I’ve read some of the reports and I can feel it now that we’re speaking. Your sense of justice seems to outweigh everything else. You’re trying to fix the world, just like Diana.” 

Clark is still silent.

“Don’t worry, your secret is safe with me. See you tomorrow Clark.” 

Nothing else is said, you just walk away and Clark is left contemplating everything. 

Safe to say the continuation of that project is a bit tense. 

The assignment to find and interview a corporate manager of your choice was easy. Chloe had finally relented when Clark insisted he didn’t want to bother Lex. So you all had chosen a random establishment. You did your part, and you didn’t miss the subtle looks Clark kept sending your way. 

Now sitting in the library as you all put the information into a paper, his glances are much harder to mask. At one point you catch him. He does his best to look away and you just sigh. 

“I’m going to get a drink.” You inform. Chloe nods, typing away vigorously. Clark lifts his head, and when you break the corner, he stands. 

“I’m gonna grab a snack.” 

Chloe barely acknowledges, waving her hand off.

Clark rushes off to the back where the vending machine is located. 

“Are you following me now?” 

You appear behind him. 

He flinches, turning to you. 

“N-No I was just getting a snack.” 

He points at the vending machine. You don’t believe a word he says. 

“Your friends, they don’t know, do they?” 

His intention is to fully deny it, but it’s clear that any lie he intends to present would not work. He doesn’t like how easily you seem to see right through him. 

“They don’t.” 

He finally admits. 

“I can’t imagine it being easy, masking as a mortal. Although I can’t say that I’ve met a being like you before.”

You circle him in interest and he turns with you a bit awkwardly.

“You’re not a witch, or a demigod, at least not like Diana.” 

You take a step, sniffing and he lifts his hand. 

“A-Are you smelling me?” 

You nod, moving back, eyes wide with awe.

“You’re a Kryptonian…” 

Clark looks alarmed at how quick you made such a connection. 

“How do you know that!” 

He half whispers half yells as he takes your arm and begins to guide you out the back. 

You stumble for a second, clearly taken by surprise. His strength is impressive. Before you even get to the door, you grab his wrist. He’s stunned when you spin him around and pin him to the wall. He grunts, face now pressed to the wall at the force and your eyes are once again hard. 

“I don’t enjoy being handled, kryptonian.” 

He realizes now that he’s underestimated your strength.

He can’t get free, and you finally release him. 

There goes your temper again. 

“Sorry.” You mumble. 

Clark massages his wrist, then shakes his head. It’s been instinct for him to be guarded. No one has ever made him this quickly without at least catching a glimpse of his powers. 

“I should apologize. I’m just not used to people knowing my secret.” 

That you can understand. 

“I’ve read about you. Encounters from my ancestors. You smell alien. So my evaluation is that you’re either kryptonian or martian. The other galaxies are a lot further. Certain species tend to avoid earth due to its atmosphere. Your kind has a better tolerance. The sun enhances your abilities. “

Clark isn’t used to someone knowing this much about him. 

“You don’t have to worry. I’m not going to say anything.” 

There’s that code switch again. It always seems to take him by surprise. He doesn’t sense any kind of malice, but he’s learned that it’s never smart to just trust random beings. Especially ones that held strength that rivals his own. 

“Why would you help me?” 

It’s not a bad question. Given how you’ve acted around him, you shouldn’t be surprised that he’s questioning your motives. 

“Because spilling your secret wouldn’t exactly do me a whole lot of good. Besides..” You look away a bit bashfully. 

“My mother told me once that Kryptonians are usually very loyal. I don’t see a reason that I shouldn’t trust you.” 

Clark deflates. Because just a second ago you looked like you would punch a hole in him. 

Now you’re almost blushing and he can’t help but think that it’s cute. It’s apparent that he’ll have to put his trust in you. Because given the situation there isn’t really anything he can do. 

It’s obvious that with you, nothing is as it seems.

[hrodvitnon]

can we talk spoilers? (if at least tag them so those who haven't seen it yet can block the tag)

anyway

DOUG STEALS KONG'S LUNCH LOL. He's even so smug about it when Kong relents and lets him have it.

Mothra is so much fluffier this time around! Love how when she breaks up Godzilla and Kong's fight she's almost SCOLDING Goji lol. "Goji! Stop bullying the poor monkey!" "S..sorry, dear..." Jia seems to be her main priestess now tho? Whatever happened to the twin scientists from KOTM? I hope they aren't entirely forgotten and replaced. Maybe they can return as Jia's guides.

Shimo is adorable. I'm glad she got a happy ending and some neck scratches from Kong. Big huggable lizard-horse-kitty.

Suko saves the day by retrieving Kong's axe? Huh. That lil kid pulled his weight a lot more than I'd expected to. Also love his mean streak at the start, he and Kong bickered a lot at first.

And of course, Skar King's very very karmic and brutal demise. I can only imagine the state of him (and Rio de Janeiro's streets) when those ice chunks finally thaw out. Good luck with the cleanup, Monarch.

Everyone make sure you filter "gxk spoilers" because I've been using that tag for everyone not looking to be spoiled!

I think Mothra suddenly becoming an Iwi protector is because supposedly there was going to be another Original MonsterVerse Monster called Phosphora or some-such, but it wasn't well received by test audiences or something so it got reworked into Mothra. I could be misremembering, but that's what I remember hearing. Which is funny, because if memory serves correctly the KOTM end credits hinted at Mothra having already laid an egg before the Boston battle, so... retcon?

I'm really glad Shimo survived the movie, I felt so bad for her being under Skar King's pain control and how she visibly resists him throughout. Even her roars sounded pained. It was really sweet seeing the look in her eyes when the surface world sky is being cleared up, like if she's the source of the last Ice Age then it's been literally thousands upon thousands of years since she's last seen a sky like ours. Hoping we see her again in another movie!

Holy shit, Suko's introduction scene got SO MUCH FUNNIER when he goes from "i'm baby" to biting Kong's finger to being used as a BLUDGEONING WEAPON BY KONG. Suko really chugged that character development juice.

I feel vindicated for not once underestimating Skar King, because he is the most vile MonsterVerse... uh, monster villain we've gotten so far. Ghidorah was a sadistic son of a bitch and Mechagodzilla was a crazy Titan Terminator On Blue Rock Steroids, but Skar King has the heads of fellow Kongs stuck on pikes (presumably to set an example for anyone looking to challenge him), when he mocks Kong's new tooth most of the apes and especially Suko seem to laugh along out of fear, he straight up KICKS an ape into lava, and has actual sex slaves holding babies in his throne room, and you just KNOW they don't consent to what he does to them. On top of him controlling Shimo with pain and his attempts on Suko's life - and considering the number of red/orange-furred babies in the throne room, we can surmise that Suko is one of his own children - Skar King may not have the spectacle or scale Ghidorah had, but my god did it feel good seeing him go down.

[werezmastarbucks]

1. Be nice to the weird guy and see what happens

barry allen x female reader

word count: 1745

part one out of 8

He liked to sit next to you at the cafeteria because nobody else would have him; he was the chatty, obnoxious dude with the weird laughter who annoyed the fuck out of anybody who had the rotten luck of spending time with him. It was known that during the classes, he was definitely useful to some; being all open and helpful with the late homework, difficult passages and intricate nuances of law. His real love was physics, though, and if he started babbling about it, one could shoot oneself in the mouth.

You didn't mind. Perhaps it was the fact that Barry was extremely easy on the eye - the whole sculptured face and the articulate mouth thing going on. But, rather, you liked to listen to his theories in the breaks, between literature, history of literature, critical literature, medieval literature... well, there was a lot of lit. Once you got through his initial jokes, complicated formulations and extremely long lyrical digressions, you started hearing really interesting things. Maybe you were a little bit more patient than everybody else. Maybe you just clicked.

Thus you spent almost all breaks at college. You'd emerge from the different sides of the building in the messy crowd of peers, and meet at the cafeteria where only one table could tolerate Barry Allen. You'd always switch lunches; you were dead set on eating more dairy because it was good for stomach, but, ironically, you couldn't stomach (pun intended) the feeling of yoghurt in your mouth. Not hard, not liquid, what is this thing, yoghurt? Yet, you bravely bought it every time, and then, after a couple of spoons, gagged, and after several weeks Barry was already accustomed to silently switch trays with you. He always bought the second one anyway. The dude ate for three and was still lean, almost slender.

You'd listen to his ramblings about equations until you got bored, and then would start asking him actually relevant questions.

Barry, how the fuck do we build the ionic engine asap? Barry, is that possible, that a person, not a metahuman, but a usual human, could hold gusts of dark matter inside and have the cells tolerate it? Barry, how the heck do mirrors work?

He was always happy to talk about it with you. You liked each other. You were nice to the weird guy who was being mildly bullied, frowned upon, by other students; and this way, you got your first friend at Central City College.

It's been months before you started noticing some strange things about your hyperactive, gluttonous, OCD, nervous, obnoxious friend.

First, that building collapse that happened on Thursday, 12th of December, and when the phones of the entire classroom started going off, you thought immediately about telling your friend, Barry. It's a natural reaction. You were puzzled not to see him in the cafeteria, or anywhere in the College, although you'd seen each other that morning, and moreover, Barry skipped studies very rarely. You thought it odd and texted him, and only got the reply very late that night:

"Sorry, I had to run, eaten something reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaally shitty. Yeha, I've seen on the news. Crazy. Cool that Batman and the Flash were there".

He always, always misspelt 'yeah'.

You wouldn't build the whole picture until much later, when you started seeing a pattern. Barry acted really weird when talking about metahumans. Not that it was your favorite topic, or you spoke about it often. But every time, he would start nervously stuttering and blinking like thirty times faster, and try to change the subject.

Uhm, yeah? The Flash, he's- he's really cool, yeah? So... fast!

The usually talkative, imaginative Barry was at loss when talking about them. If you'd ask him to characterize the metahumans, he'd describe all of them as 'cool' and 'fast'.

Then, there were these sudden disappearances when something occurred in the city or elsewhere. Of course, when you look at it with the perspective, it's laughably obvious, but while the history is writing itself... yes, Barry has gone rogue here and there during the classes, and then reappeared a day later, and happened to slack at replying to you, but you didn't text to each other that often. So the crazy realization came to you a different way.

The Justice League did not like the spotlight very much. The most outspoken and open ones were Wonder Woman and Aquaman. Those two, they were so invincible that they had nothing to be afraid of. Always smiling confidently and calmly, with nothing but polite words of support, should they happen to meet someone who'd recognize them. Batman, Cyborg and Superman were the different tale. They were secretive, quiet, evasive. They were the real cool heroes, who left the intrigue hanging, made everyone ask questions and hope for excitement. You yourself have written 2000 words on the phenomenon of mysertious identities of the team, for your creative writing homework.

But the Flash. The fastest person on the planet was the hardest to catch, and at the same time, the pictures of his face, out of those four who were hiding their identities, were of the best quality.

There were three pictures: one from Gotham City a year ago, when a bridge has been blown up, and the team gathered to deal with the aftermath. The shot was not too blurry, with his back turned, but you could see the way he was standing, resting, like an Olympic runner.

Second picture was a picture of his face, but relatively bad; it was probably a maximized shot cut out from somewhere. You could be looking at a mashed potato and trying to guess the eyes and the mouth.

Third, was a picture of the whole team from Laos, where they were doing god knows what, honestly, you weren't that interested in superpeople. The news headline said that they had located the position of the weapon smugglers, and Batman took charge unlawfully, and the whole Justice League was in peril. Not for the Flash though! That day also provided a video of him, probably a very foolish thing to do for someone who is trying to stay unknown. You got a close up Batman, who was trying to shove the camera down, and then, seemingly from under his elbow, the bright red Flash appeared, very close, his face at 45 degrees to the camera. Looking briefly into the lense, he said,

"Umm, I, like, see the remains out there, I'll go then chief".

Utter gibberish, said in the same voice that always told you tales of speed, and particles, and timeline, during lunch breaks.

You weren't looking or investigating on purpose; it was just boredom. It was February, and you had cold. You were browsing the news to be aware of the next essay point. And then you saw this guy, with parasite words flooding his speech, so close to the camera that you paused, and leaned in, and yelled,

"What the fuck?!"

Later that week, after you got better and returned to studies, you met Barry at cafeteria during the break. It was pretty much the only times you met at all, but friendship was string, joyful, and mutually respectful. You started noticing the limp that he hadn't had five days ago, and the way his cheekbones might just be the most recognizable cheekbones in the world. Barry Allen was also granted some of the most distinctive voices you'd heard: capricious, like a chainsaw working. Once you'd heard it, you'd never forget.

You pretended to eat like nothing happens as he told you about every little fucking thing that happened at the College while you were away.

You considered being decent and talk to him eye to eye, but the curiosity, boredom, got the best of you, and you snapped right after you've finished your meals.

As you left the cafeteria and walked across the yard to get into the next building, to the library, you phased in and returned to reality, only to discover he was still talking.

"Are you the Flash?" you asked quietly, snugging closer to him.

You could see the closeness at first startled him; his eyes darted from your shoulder to your face, but then the information reached his brain.

"Why would you say that?" he asked.

You stood in front of him, almost laughing.

"What do you mean? I've seen one video", you whispered, "and realized it was you. I mean- it would be more difficult not to see it. And your voice, it was your voice!"

Barry clasped his hands together as if he was a boy being told off.

"Well, I've also seen the resemblance, and..."

You took your phone and opened the screenshot you'd taken, and put it next to his face to compare. Barry's hand was on your immediately, taking the phone down. Seriousness changed into joking denial.

"Come on, I mean, I take it as a compliment, but I can't possibly be the Fla-hu-huhsh".

His laughter drew a wall between you. In a moment, for some fucked up reason, you felt misunderstood, and hurt.

"Why are you denying this? I won't tell anyone", you looked around, at the utterly indifferent surrounding, where people wouldn't care if you two got completely undressed and started eating soil.

"I am your friend. I was just so flabbergasted to find this out. But I won't tell anyone".

Barry looked lost. He seemed like a boy so much at that moment, not knowing what to say.

He knew you wouldn't tell. He was surpried it took you more than two months to realize who he was. Bruce and Diana were dead set on keeping him anonymous. Bruce especially; he was constantly paranoid about Barry, and what he did to compromise himself, and his social circle (although he said a number of times he didn't have any). He would butcher the idea into his head almost every time they went on a mission: be careful, don't interact with anyone, don't let people look into your face too much; the mask is too revealing.

He was now in between. The idea that Y/N would know him for real made him feel more special than even his powers.

"I'm sorry, I am not the Flash", he said. He watched your face close down with disappointment.

"It's okay, I understand, I guess".

Why did she have to be so stubborn though? It's like, every time Y/N knew something, or thought she knew something, nothing would turn her around, not even the reality.

[bil-daddy]

Heard that we could spill the tea abt our love life, so here’s mine:

There’s this girl who I sit next to in maths, and she used to have a crush on me, like she was ABSOLUTELY WHIPPED. Everyone around us was teasing her for having a crush and I was still oblivious.

So it turns out I’m lesbian and have a crush on her too! But she’s been out of school for a while, and when she comes back, she says she’s straight. Rumours are that she was sent to conversion therapy. So I confess to her one day, and she tells me that I’m being “sinful” and all that stuff. So she tells everyone and now I’ve been outed. Her friends constantly harass me about it and she goes along. I don’t think we’re friends anymore, but I still really like her. so yeah

Hi, anon. Sorry that this is happening. To you, and to your crush.

Conversion therapy is abusive and traumatic, and even if she wasn't actually sent there and that was just a rumour, it sounds like her family isn't accepting of her sexuality and is forcing her to deny it. You confessing your feelings to her made her feelings for you more difficult to deny, and so now she's taking it out on you.

It's not right, it's not fair, and it's not your job to tolerate it just because you like her and she likes you. This isn't a healthy situation for either of you, and whatever she's going through--and it seems like she's going through a lot--it doesn't give her an excuse to out you or to start a harassment campaign against you with her friends.

It has to stop.

Now, I'm not going to suggest you tell the bullies to stop or to just ignore them. That never works. Some kind of action will have to be taken to get them to stop.

You know your school and the region you live in better than I do. Would going to the school administration help end the bullying without getting your friend in any more trouble with her parents? Or will going to the adults just make it worse?

Do you have a friend group of your own that can stand up to the harassers? They might back off if it's not all of them against one of you, but rather all of them versus you and all your friends.

How big is the school? Is it big enough to just avoid your crush and her friends? Are they seeking you out deliberately? Or does it just occur when they happen to see you around?

If you have access to your phone, try to get a recording of what they are doing. They might stop just to avoid being the next homophobic karens going viral. Not to mention future employers and universities probably don't want the bad publicity of hiring or admitting people like that. Plus, you'll want to have the evidence in case you do need to go to the school authorities.

At this point, though, I'd advise against trying to talk to your crush directly, online or in person, and avoid being alone with her.

There's nothing you can do to help her right now. As long as she's living with her parents, she will have to deny her sexuality. It's sad, cruel even, but it's the reality. For her own safety, she will have to hide who she is until she can get out.

And for your own safety, you will have to stay away from her.

Years from now, she might reach out to you and apologize for everything that happened. And then you can decide if you want to forgive her, be friends again, maybe even more. But right now, you can't be with her. I'm sorry.

Your crush won't instantly go away. It'll take some time to get over. But focus on getting the harassment to stop, so you can then focus on living your life without this hanging over your head. It won't be easy, but I know you can do it.

Take this ox rib (platonic) for strength. Good luck, kid (human)

And if anyone who's gone through something similar wants to chime in with their own advice and experience, please do (platonic)

[katyspersonal]

If I had a nickel for every time a person that quite seriously helped with public slandering and humiliating me for fake ass reasons, supported drastically ableist stance on me and took the side of my stalker (that also I remind you bullied other fans for headcanons) then got upset and "insulted" at the fact that I vented about how much they hurt me and my friends, I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot but what the actual fuck.

Like... Maybe consider not spyoning on a blog of a person that "makes you uncomfy"? You will be happier if you don't check up on things and people you hate, seriously. And if you do, why you act so shocked that I express my pain and disapproval of your actions and mindset, the very same that hurt me and my friends? In fact, why DOES it hurt you to learn what I think and feel after your words and actions? Why do you CARE about feelings and opinion of a person you despise and disrespect so much that you deemed them worthy of all this, and even their friends deserve to be hurt by association? Like... NOW you consider my feelings? Of course I fucking disapprove of backstabbing me and my friends after over month of pretending to forgive me. Of course I fucking disapprove admission that you are willing to help slandering and humiliating a person that you were not even scared and hurt by. I wrongly assumed that if you hated me that much, I must have actually done something wrong, but now I know I still didn't because you admitted that you were willing to harm someone and even shun their friends without even as much as hard feelings, because they are a "heretic"?

Is what hurts that I had very high opinion on you and then flipped on a dime when something drastic came out? But isn't it the same way for you? Didn't you both like my blog and thought I was cool and then one day it was over? I think it is safe to assume that unfortunately it can work like that. And everything can be fixed and worked into neutrality and 'cold peace' coexistence, but you don't want that. You'd rather keep getting upset and self-isolate from everyone that likes my company, or isolate them from me, so this hole just keeps growing and growing and all good things that could have been keep falling into it. Or you really expect me to leave just because of all this? When I was a kid and a teen and a bit of a young adult, I've dealed with bullying to the point of having literal stones thrown into me, and never once I avoided the places where it was happening. Because it made no logical sense that some jerks could decide who belongs or not belongs in a place that is for everyone. I tried to enjoy my time anyway. I was not, listening and enduring all that, but I tried. Sometimes I'd get really bad for me and I'd snap and fight back, and I remember they were scared when I did because anger of cornered rat is a terrifying thing you know? One time it got especially bad with one of them and I snatched the bat from her hands and smacked HER over the face, worse than she hurt me but I've had enough. Then finally adults bothered to get involved, and what I received from the bullies was "but why didn't she just leave this area? :(" Why the question is "why won't you go away?" instead of "why I feel entitled to bully out a person that didn't even do anything bad to me but just makes me uncomfy with not being like us?"

In the end, I walked a full circle. Some autists just have a power of bringing out the worst in people with how much they don't understand unspoken social cues, cultural rifts, even the language and semantics often times. I have a friend with similar problem, he had a bad luck of using combination of words that make people go blind from rage without meaning to, and you find out he actually made a perfect logical sense after talking to him for context and reasoning. I thought it was a curse, but it is a blessing. I decided I will never fix what is "wrong" with me, if it really helped to separate fakers from real ones in such a short time. Without it, I'd be friends with traitors, cowards, bullies, fools, conformists and stalkers. And the worst part, I would not ever learn it.

Yet again: you are NOT harmed by me venting in MY blog about how I was hurt by your words and actions. If you two were okay with slander and public humiliation of someone and their friends, sure you must be okay with someone venting about actual harm. Or else you have double standards. You are not supposed to care about what I think about you either, you are supposed to crawl into your Discord groups to share screenshots of my posts and mock me there for "being so butthurt" like your kind of people always does. And if you do not want me to hold grudges, you've had enough chances to neutralize me. I was not having you blocked for a good reason. But you chose to keep throwing stones. Too bad for you, I've been trained for this shit, when your spoiled soft asses cry harm and trauma over a single slightly negative experience. Heck, over even reading something you don't like!

Here is a thing: I do not namedrop you. I only namedropped two people when it was relevant, and only because they made themselves public first so I didn't "out" them. And if some people read "he reblogged posts bullying me 50 times too often and was too eager to hate on me, like to the point it was scary" and instantly think of you, then consider what reputation you have. Why? Why? Why you'd throw me (and. my. FRIENDS.) to the wolves and then get angry that I react? Tell me why! It is your problem that you are willing to harm people willy-nilly without considering their feelings or bothering to actually learn whether they deserve stalking and bullying and their friends getting collateral damage, and in the end you don't even have the honor to be genuinely mad and scared as your motivation for it. It is """not personal""". So getting unhealthy obsession with helping slandering me was "not personal"? So acting oh-so-supportive towards my friend who got to talk about her identity and then instantly dropping her upon learning she was interacting with me, after previously having been thankful to her for being one of the first to support YOU, was "not personal"? And the worst thing, I believe it. This is just your Tiktok generation of cruel, overly-judgemental people. You did not get to learn about real life and real relationship and real complexities, and you never will. And I was such a fool doubting myself thinking that you were scared of me.

So tell me why. Tell me why NOW you care what I think of you? Why you care that I vent in MY blog, without namedropping? Why you care what I say and feel if I am nothing but a name of "heretic" to block and pass along for you, a person you don't know and don't think has feelings and nuance worthy of considering before mistreating? Why do you CARE about my opinion? Is this because I effects your self-image? But I am just a stupid bigot in your eyes, so how can my opinion have any power or credibility for you? Are you scared that people will find out? But I do not namedrop! Are you upset that "I don't know you" to say such things? But you do not know ME, and yet that didn't stop you from accepting and helping to spread extremely hateful and uncharitable headcanons about my personality, beliefs and motives your friends crafted, so clearly you are okay with "saying things"? Why? TELL ME WHY! Tell me how it is supposed to hurt you, because it does NOT! The worst I can do is to yell at you and run away crying, and I didn't even do THAT!

Unless I just did, because yet again you decided to sneak around and check my blog. Dude, you hate acknowledging my existence to you point of abandoning mutuals that answer my asks, so why would you check my blog? Just don't do that? Just not check it? There were 4 coincidences about your art that made me think that you were snooping on my content, I am helpful with the lore I know, and took some stuff for inspiration, and one time was passively-aggressive about how I drew a certain female character. But I've got a relief that no, they were all coincidences, and you were not stalking me. So now I have to worry about it again? So I should give into my paranoia, because there was a reason in the end?

Just go away, okay? Just go away. The alter that grew from guilt and pain, and admiration, that you've triggered, is dead, anyhow. It was painful and felt like getting the whole entirety erased and written again, but it's done, so you don't have to worry about it either. Just not sneak on a person you dislike, because, again, me venting without namedropping won't effect you, nor you should care what "just another heretic" thinks. I am not a human for people like you, after all your drama-hungry kind does, and stop pretending that I am. My friends aren't either, they are just "traitors" that refuse to cooperate for your group, and I hate every single conformist bastard that blocked them by association. Not you, them. I won't have a gaslighting of "it is not us vs them!!!!" when actions speak louder than words, and all effected people know what they did.

So far I do not have an incentive to stop digging myself deeper into a hole of "wronged intellectual" self-image, which is a bold claim for someone with quite large intellectual disability as myself, I know. But none of this makes any sense, and doubting that maybe I just don't get something about people availed me nothing. I do get it, society IS just as bad as it seems, deny it or not.

[natsu-tte-noodle]

手紙 (Letters) - To Misumi

(Cross Posted on AO3)

Words: 781 Warnings: ACT 5 Spoilers

Misumi,

It’s getting rather chilly these days.  Before we know it, it’ll drop below freezing in the mornings.  Be sure to bundle up when you go out.

I’m not one for perfect settings or seasonal hobbies, but it really does feel like the perfect time of year to write a letter.  I wonder if that was intentional on Izumi’s part, or if she got lucky with a coincidence.

Honestly, I had expected to get this done much quicker, but I ended up getting distracted trying to bully Chigasaki into starting his.  Which I’ve had no luck with, by the way.  At this point, it’s his problem if that gets out to someone who cares.

That said, feel free to tell someone who cares.

Anyway, I can’t say I’m particularly familiar with writing letters that aren’t for business.  Or, maybe it’s more accurate to say that I’m not familiar with writing letters where I cared at all what the person getting it would think.

I’d also be lying if I said I was completely sure what to write here.  My own letter ended up yelling at me quite a bit, but it was from Sakyo, so I guess that’s to be expected.  Still, it’s not the best reference to go off of.  Leave it to our director to throw me completely for a loop with this, right?  For now, I’ll write whatever comes to mind and we’ll see where that takes us.

The other day, when I was coming home after an extended overtime, I happened to see you up on the roof.  I’m still not sure how you manage to get up there silently enough to not wake even a single person.  It’s certainly something.

I was tempted to call out to you, but you seemed so unusually serious.  I suppose the night naturally breeds that sort of atmosphere, but in the moment, it still felt like I shouldn’t impose.

Is it the starry sky itself that you’re interested in?  Or is it the mystique behind it that draws your attention?  I think both are impressive in their own right.  Beyond our Earth, already bigger than we can really comprehend, there’s a whole universe out there.  Only visible at night, and so far away that it all appears to us as tiny.  Did you know?  Some starlight is billions of years old, and is only just reaching us now.

Writing about the stars reminds me of the Tanabata festivities we held back in July.  If I remember correctly, I woke up to a room covered in layered triangles, courtesy of a certain triangle lover.  I’m not sure if I’ve mentioned it before, but I spent a lot of my life outside of Japan for studies and work, so I actually had never really celebrated Tanabata before.  Needless to say, it was quite the surprise to find all those decorations, since I wasn’t even familiar with them before that day.

When I first heard the story of Orihime and Hikoboshi, I instantly understood how the sight of the Milky Way in the night sky would evoke the image of a wide river.  A river made of billions of stars, only crossable because two people wished hard enough for it.  It feels hopeful to a fault.  Though I suppose that in itself can be admirable.

That’s neither here nor there, though.  I don’t have particularly strong feelings on all this; I guess you could say it’s just the impression I get of still nights with only the moon as company.

In that stillness, it really does feel like a wish on a tanzaku could be granted, doesn’t it?  My wish is a secret though, of course.

That’s all I’ve got, really.  Be sure to not catch a cold up there.

　

Chikage

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

　

What do you see up in the stars?

Are you looking for something in particular?  When you speak to the empty air, ‎are you talking to someone?

　

　

　

Do you think they hear you?

　

This must be coming out of nowhere.  Honestly, I’m not even sure myself where I’m coming from or trying to go with this.

I just thought that it would be nice, if that person up in the stars is really listening.  If they were watching over you and hearing your stories.  If they could see you living the life they hoped you would, when they weren’t there anymore.

Or maybe I’m being presumptuous.  I don’t mean to assume things about you or what you do up there, so I apologize.

If it’s alright with you, though, I think it might be nice to join you up there one day.  There’s someone I’ve been meaning to catch up with, too.

[Top]   [Back - To Masumi]   [Next]

[scoobydoodean]

About Me Being a Jackass

So. As some of you saw, the other day I fucked up. I am not going to apologize for the fact that something offended me or for my opinion, but I am sorry for how I addressed it. Regardless of how much or little offense what someone else said made me feel, I am the bigger asshole at the end of the day, because I perpetuated a message that screenshotting people’s tags to shit on them behind their back is okay.

@ original person involved: I haven't deleted my posts, because the nature of Tumblr is that other copies of what happened remain on various blogs regardless, and I didn’t want you to feel like I was trying to hide what was said at least until I had made this post establishing that I am the asshole. However, I will go back and hide everything from being visible to randoms opening the notes to minimize the potential of you receiving grief from anyone, and if you would like me to, I will also DM this post to those who reblogged the original incident and ask them to delete their copies of it from their blogs. I can’t promise compliance, but I figure if I ask nicely as the OP, I might have decent luck.

Back to the general audience: I have a few lessons for myself here, and I hope you read them and consider learning from my mistakes too (if you aren't already too smart to be like my dumbass).

Never respond to something that annoyed, offended, irritated, or grossed you out at 3AM. This is, universally, a bad idea. This is something I actually know already, from my many years on the internet, so there isn't an excuse. I have had, "Oh thank god" moments before when waking up to look at things I decided the night before, to not put out into the world and to sit on instead to see how I felt about them the next morning. Rarely have I ever woken up no longer feeling negatively about what someone else said, but I at least wake up with a clearer head on the appropriate response to it. So don't do it. Just shut the fuck up and go to bed. You will save yourself from a lot of stupid decisions.

Never assume that using tags to comment on something means it won't get screenshotted and re-tagged with more note-passing-in-class-style commentary. The person who tagged my post didn't expect anyone to respond. They likely expected at most for their friends to maybe like it and maybe a reblog with '#prev'. I responded to the tags they didn't expect me to comment on while also tagging my addition for something and expecting it to stay on my blog and for nobody to reblog the tags I had added, which was fucking dumb considering the thing I literally just did is make somebody else's tags show hole.

Never assume that reposting something to a sideblog where you don't have very many followers is sufficiently private. It is still an online space. It is not private. If you MUST be upset and vent IMMEDIATELY because you CANNOT help yourself, send it in a DM to your friend instead.

Never assume that leaving off someone's username from their tags when you screenshot them is sufficient to protect that person's identity. Especially not when you are stupid and screenshot their tags on the very post where they tagged what they tagged. There is no excuse for me, because just the other day, I saw someone else post a screenshot of tags on one of their posts (in a separate post, to disagree with them) and almost reblogged it, but then realized that would spread it further around the circle and would feel like bullying to me because it was all being said behind their back. Then my dumbass went and did something that fostered an even more potentially harmful environment for another person... by doing the same thing on the actual post. To my knowledge, I don't believe anyone retaliated directly against the person in question through their mailbox or DMs (and if anyone did, I will lob a spear into your computer over wifi), but I created a potential that was very real for that to happen, and the actual outcome, where people were just shitting on them in my notes, was already bad enough. Just don't screenshot tags you don't like to talk about them, actually. Go to bed. Later on, maybe write your own post in your own words about the idea you saw that you didn't like (not the person who said the idea—the idea. The person is just a person). You'll have a clearer head then anyway and you'll be a lot more eloquent and level-headed.

If the joke you are telling by being snarky about someone's tags you screenshotted is "Haha now we are all mischaracterizing each other", don't go back 5 minutes later and tag what they said for biphobia. If you keep looking at what they said and find it offends you more and more because that's genuinely what you see in it regardless of what was intended, just delete your reblog. It isn’t like you’re having a fun time like you were 5 minutes ago. You are promoting something that makes you feel bad and you have figured out at least one reason why. Also, it will turn into accusations of someone being an evil irredeemable villain when other people pass it around to shit on the person for what they said and what you said about what they said and add more transgressions they committed to the list (see Part 2). If you believe something is intentionally and maliciously offensive (that wasn't the case here FYI) you still shouldn't put it on the dash imo because you'll be giving it a platform. You should block the person if you believe they're actually a bigoted asshole.

Remember that this is all media.

When an offended party's friend DMs you, and in the process of trying to defend their friend while extending an olive branch, actually hands you an olive branch full of spiders (i.e., saying more things that make you go 🙈) just don't respond and move on with your life. It isn't worth it. Tangentially: on the initial (before shit hit the fan) subject and everything you two have left me with as responses from the thread of the initial subject... I won't respond any further about our differing analysis, because I can tell you for a fact it won't be productive. Based on what has been said so far, and how each successive argument that has been brought up included more things that I vehemently disagree with in terms of how it frames a person's lived experiences and issues and how they define a person's value... we simply shouldn't continue talking about it. That doesn't mean I think you're bad people, but it does mean the conversation will only come with more bad vibes for all of us and more hurt feelings. Once again: sorry for being a flaming jackass.

[thewolfisawake]

Other than Rukiya, Noita has one of the more unorthodox exorcist practices. And unlike Rukiya, they truly cannot teach anyone to do anything the way they do for the simple reason that it is simply a part of them. Any teaching or nagging they do is because they use normal exorcism discipline to conceptualize their own power. What is this power? Misfortune.

Noita was born with an aura of misfortune. It started innocuous but always present. It was thought to be a string of bad luck. Everyone gets down on their luck sometime. However it was their mother that had sensed this aura a long time ago but it was only thought to be a part of the mental break that led to her abandoning their family.

Unfortunately as time goes on and bad stuff continued happening, Noita was considered a jinx and bullied and generally unliked. Although it was thought to be from their heterochromia rather than an actual trait about them. Noita, being a quick-witted sort, usually could avoid their own misfortune hurting them. However they didn't know it extended to those around them and it is here where a lot of their negative life experiences came from.

It was their last physical fight with their brother that they truly started to consider if there was something about them that caused bad luck. They did this as more of thought exercises initially of thinking bad things to happen to others. Then they got more specific. Then they started seeing if they could imbue it into objects or create timing for when it goes off.

Noita mainly used this to aid with their theft, fights and escapes at a kid and adolescent. It wasn't until their run in and deal with the Bastion that Noita really expanded how to deal with their power. It was known what blood ran with Noita because of wisteria colored eye. This was from the Marufuji family, exorcists known in Japan but do not willfully associate with the family. Seeing as Noita is not affiliated with them and held strong spiritual power, they were an opportunity.

However it was difficult to figure out how to teach them. The exorcist study in Europe were not compatible with them as many are faith based and their faith...sucks. So they actually had borrowed materials from the Sumeragi family in the hopes that maybe they click naturally with the style similar to their birth family. And it paid off...sorta.

While Noita could execute exorcist abilities because of the virtue of having spiritual power, this is not what kicked their misfortune. What did it for them was when the manuals spoke about curses. Their reading led to them conceptualizing their power as a living, limitless curse. While by now it works basically instanteously because of their years of training, when Noita first started they considered their trigger like the bite of a snake or a shank. Because of how they visualize, their hits with their power is immensely quick. Both in execution and spreading of it.

How the misfortune manifests is not something Noita can always know. They have been doing it long enough to have a general idea of how it might act up. In its most harmless state, the target is basically afflicted with a bout of bad luck. They'll trip over things, run into things, randomly get smacked with something, etc. Noita might do this if they want to catch someone. Upping the ante is when they can run into weaponry failure, loss of use in limbs (temporarily), the building coming down on them. And truly bad misfortune...well, that hasn't been experienced to anyone consciously knowing.

Their misfortune is also ties into another aspect: chaos. It skews towards the part of chaos that no one likes, the discord and unpredictability. It is an aspect they have been exploring and so far only held back by their years. They can cause mild disasters and disruptions with their ability. And because they're petty this sometimes is done so that Bastion has to deal with collateral damage.

And as for how they use their power for their exorcism, depends on the being. For many Eastern spirits and they like they are manifestations of misfortune. So, Noita has some degree of control over them. This is usually to direct them away from the general populace. As for how to get rid of them, they somewhat attune to the being's 'wavelength' and then essentially dispel them. The stronger the being, the closer they have to reach a resonance.

For beings not directly dealing with misfortune, it's pretty straight forward. They basically curse it to death. The creature is cursed by a focus, usually straight up stabbing them or direct blast to them. Then it manifests like a poison, it spreads and destroys in all facets until one of the failures makes it fall dead.

Because of how their method works, Noita is considered very ruthless by other exorcists. Their method does not offer any way for vengeful spirits to move on or go in peace. And direct cursing is usually not pretty. So many hunters sent on missions with them are fearful of them. And it is for reasons like that that Noita often goes on missions with Tannim, the closest they have to a childhood friend and the one man that counters their misfortune.

What I mean by counter isn't like he can bat away their curses but he does balance their aura. When they are not in combat or doing work, Noita's aura remains active. It's not something they can shut off. And trying to suppress it ends up in a build up that causes some real calamity shit. So passively dealing with having a constantly shitty little things is better to them. But if their aura is misfortune, the closest approximation to Tannim's is 'good fortune.' Tannim despite his life story is passively very lucky. So him in proximity to Noita evens their fortune to basically average. It's something they both can enjoy and probably a sorta unconscious reason why they hang around each other a lot.

A lot of their control is considered discipline. As a person that takes learning and exploration as an interest, it isn't really considered a chore for them to hone their power. However in actuality, Noita's power is very much tied with their state of being. So like their will and their emotions all affect how it works. Loss of control isn't a heavy issue to them but it's not like they haven't and that time was...A Time.

[sexwithsophie]

Aww. Thank you for tagging me; I am incredibly honored! You couldn't bother me if you tried, my sweet. Once again, I feel that we've visited the same place, but arrived there from two different paths. It took a long while and a lot of work, but I am grateful to have found an escape from that prison of unworthiness, and a few things that helped me were:

Identifying and adjusting my philosophy of life

Following in the footsteps of the undeserving

Changing the conversations I have with myself

1️⃣ You and I have discussed this at length, but a quick takeaway that I hope is helpful to anyone suffering from a diminishment of self is to understand that every single thing that is causing you to feel that way is imaginary. This is going to be long as hell…

As in, it literally doesn't exist outside your own mind. I know that can be hard to believe when society, bullies, or maybe even a parent has tried to make you believe you are 'less than,' but you must begin to recognize how that simply does not align with reality.

I wrote a post about why you objectively deserve happiness, but if we just take that as a fact for now, those voices telling you to minimize yourself will start to sound wrong. Like they're trying very hard to convince you that 2 + 2 = ketchup. The more you start to hear the wrongness of those voices, the easier it will be to dissociate them from your own voice.

Wrong voice: I don't deserve to have fun today. Right voice: Of course I do, that's crazy talk. Wrong voice: I'm inconveniencing someone by asking them to help me with something. Right voice: If someone were to ask me for help, I'd gladly do it, so I know they feel similarly. Wrong voice: I shouldn't ask to be pleasured before I seek my partner's pleasure. Right voice: If that's genuinely what they think, then it is them that doesn't deserve me! 2️⃣ When I was growing up, I used to see people with great jobs or in positions of power or exhibiting extraordinary talent, and I just knew that if it was possible for them, I could reach those same spaces under the right conditions. I could get a degree and go to medical school to become a doctor. I could study what actions a politician made and emulate them to become a senator. I could dedicate every available hour to playing a sport to become an athlete.

Basically, if it was possible for a human to do, any other human could do it, too, with the right amount of education, observation, practice, and a splash of luck. Obviously, as a little Black girl in America, I learned real quick that my starting point was a little further back than most. Still, I subscribe to the fact that if a thing has been achieved, it is attainable.

So. If a feeling of self-worthiness has been achieved by someone before, regardless of how deserving those someones are of it, I could actually see it as being attainable for myself. Look at Elon Musk, J. K. Rowling, Trump, Kanye West, Harrison Butker… just goes to show that the WORST, most undeserving people among us can clearly hold the highest self-worth when they objectively do not deserve it.

It will take educating yourself (literally by getting an apprenticeship or credential to validate your value, or actively by reading up on the psychology of self-esteem), observing others (finding a mentor or people exhibiting qualities you admire and following their lead), and above all, practice (going to therapy, showing vulnerability when possible, and living in the now and not the worry). You can do it!

3️⃣ The most powerful thing you can do, and the crux of 1 and 2, is self-talk. I tell my 5-year-old, your little sister, "You have to take care of my Cloud." I say that so she starts to see herself as I do, a beautiful and priceless little sweetie who must be protected at all costs. Tell me your name, and I'll tell you the same. YOU HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF MY [SAY YOUR NAME]!

Not only would I, and everyone who loves you, be devastated if you let anything happen to you, but we'd be so hurt if you didn't reach out for help with anything that may be causing you harm. Do you understand what I'm saying? Putting a hat on when you go outside is a great first step, but if you got sunburnt because you didn't ask me for some SPF, I will be pissed!

In other words, practice good self-talk. When you feel in the way or like you are withering, argue! Fight back! Tell your brain how dumb it's being right now and do your level best to surround yourself with people who give you the same positive messages from the outside in that you're working on telling yourself from the inside out.

Trust me, I get that this sounds a little like telling a depressed person to just cheer up. Listen, my number one recommendation will always be to seek help from a professional, but I know that isn't always possible. I'm hoping these tips can help until you're able to speak with someone. My own story around self-talk is that I, like you Caxy, used to feel so ashamed every time I masturbated. Like I was a horrible person, I wasn't 'allowed' to feel pleasure, my dead relatives were watching me, something bad is now bound to happen because I felt good for a second… it was awful. I literally had to talk myself out of that shit.

Here I am talking about it in Reason #11:

To get through this, I would orgasm and immediately start telling myself that I am fine and good, that I am alone and not hurting anybody, and that my amazing body is capable of some really fantastic things. It took quite a bit of time, but I very rarely feel that shame anymore.

This is also why I made a program called Guided Masturbations™ on my website, sexwithsophie.com! They're meant to emulate a guided meditation, but with the intention of walking you up to a particular mood. I'm so proud that the first mood we've released is called, "Guiltless!" Because this feature is for paying members, please accept a FREE lifetime membership to my website. Just visit $ex With Sophie and register for the Pecker Plan using coupon code TUMBLRBEBES to access GMs, exclusive podcast content, and all future courses and programs that will be coming soon.

Not only do I feel that these tools could be extremely helpful, but you deserve something for reading down this far lol. I truly hope that this has been an adequate response. Love you, kiddos.

so many of the transfems i know spent their time pre-transition performing a kind of lifelong exercise in self-deprivation, the goal of which was to find out exactly how little a person needed to live. they starved themselves, dressed carelessly, shunned friends, and hollowed themselves out so as not to be burdens on anyone but themselves.

i see it now, too, in the girls around me. i'll ask if they want care – a home-cooked meal, relaxed company, sex without the expectation of reciprocation – and they say no, no, thank you, i don't need it; what would you like, what do you want, because in their head they're still doing that awful calculus, still training themselves to disappear in the eyes of the people around them.

i don't think i'd have died without transition – not in the conventional sense, at least – but to take that leap, i had to stop thinking of myself as a human experiment in fuel-efficient living and start nurturing the anemic, atrophied flame of desire in my heart. i had to learn to eat well, to exercise, to style myself beautiful, but harder than that, i had to learn to ask the people around me to work on my behalf in order to enrich my life and give me the things i wanted.

and i did it; i learned. and it was agony, but courage is a muscle you can train, and every day i get better at accepting gifts with the hungry gratitude i never learned in my years and years as a sad, scared, lonely boy.

so be patient with the trans girls in your life. better than that: be proactive, attentive, generous; be forceful, if you have to, and learn to distinguish real discomfort from the terrified reflex of self-denial that so many of us once learned to rely on.

and if you are so lucky as to love a trans girl, you must insist upon her. you must insist upon her happiness, her comfort, her pleasure, and her rest, because she may still not yet know how to make those demands for herself. if you can devote any amount of energy to becoming an engine that nurtures the flame of even a single tgirl then there is a place for you in trans heaven, which as far as i'm concerned is the only one worth going to

[dynal]

Can I cheat and tell you to answer ALL OF THEM... i love hearing about altai.

this is DEFINITELY a big cheat but you know what i love you and any opportunity to talk about my ffxiv guys i will take. so as a bonus you'll also get gaius.

HERE COME THE BOYS! i'm putting it below a readmore since it will probably. get long.

🪷 what gives this character inner peace?

For Altai, prayer, definitely. At least at the beginning. As the story continues he feels he can't connect with his god as well and thinks he's losing his mind. That's when sticking around the Scions helps him feel a little better.

For Gaius, staying close to his personal hero (Altai). And reminiscing on the few happy memories he has. But reminiscing on those memories can also bring melancholy or could send him spiraling so it's a difficult balance.

🪰 what is the worst thing this character has witnessed but not experienced?

For Altai: Ugh. Look at the MSQ. Every time one of his allies dies he grieves. Even when strangers die he grieves, whether they're meant to be the "good guys" or the "bad guys" because he's not really sure where they "go" when they die. In his religion they would at least find some semblance of peace, but what about here, in this world he's hardly known?

For Gaius: Basically anything he may have heard/seen while he was trapped in the stone. Without the power to physically influence the outside world he was helpless.

🐁 how are this characters ethics?

You know Altai, he's a pretty typical "good guy" but there's a lot of extra quirks that separate him from a typical hero. Being an older man and being a follower of religion will do that to you. He deeply dislikes prejudice and reductive thinking, and believes in the freedom of all, regardless of who they follow. So whenever some kind of subjugation is happening, his brow furrows a little further and his speech gets a little more sharp--a little more old world one could say.

Gaius will just start eating people if someone doesn't stop him. He's seen the horrors of the world, witnessed the uprising of Garlemald. He's done with the bullshit and done with being trapped and unable to help.

🚬 smoking/drinking habits? signature brand or drink?

For all the jokes I've made about Altai rolling cigars I'm not sure if he genuinely smokes. It may be a more spiritual, every-once-in-a-while-for-a-ritual thing. He did often imbibe in the Utter Poison that was the centuries-aged liquor in the temple's cellar.

Gaius doesn't really get any bodily effects from drinking or smoking, but he does enjoy a good ale with friends. It's a social thing.

🌫️ how does this character feel about lying?

Altai doesn't like to lie. He'd rather be honest about a situation than have to keep up a lie. He's not the kind to think some topics are "off-limits" (like talking to a child about death) because everyone has to learn at some point (and perhaps subconsciously, knowing that he was essentially orphaned and was relentlessly bullied by his peers probably makes him think "hatred can be taught at any age, so can any other topic").

Gaius will skirt around the truth or keep quiet about something. He doesn't like to reveal his own cards (especially regarding his whole shapeshifter "I dunno if I can actually die" situation).

🐦‍⬛ fursona?

Altai is a Takin, a sort of goat-like creature that is more closely related to sheep.

Saying Gaius would be a wolf would be a copout, and he's a shapeshifter, so I guess he could be whatever. Maybe a wolverine.

♟️describe how they would play chess, if they would.

Altai would know how to play chess, but it may be a regional variant. Gaius would know too many regional variants, and would know a variant that would make a historian go "hang on a second, nobody's used this variant for over 500 years".

🎲 are they lucky?

Neither of them really believe in luck.

🐌 do they carry their home with them or is it a place?

they carry their homes with them(they carry it in their hearts)they are never without it(anywhere they go,home goes,they fear;and whatever is done by them is their home's doing,such tragedy)

🦤 are they particularly smart in any way? how so, or not?

Altai is a religious scholar--at least for his religion! He's pretty logical though so he figures out situations well.

Gaius was a scholar of astrology when he was alive, and learned a lot of stuff while he was stuck in the stone. He ends up using a lot of historical evidence to navigate situations.

🪽does this character believe in a higher power?

Altai: Yes, he follows the god Lupus (and by extension, his three blood-bound consorts).

Gaius: Can't remember that which he worshiped in the past but I've been toying with the idea of him following Thanatos. Something about following the embodiment of death but being unable to die.

🦪 how would this character describe their gender, if asked?

Altai: I suppose I'm a man. Have I experimented beyond that? Hmm, well, my god, Lupus Therion Alsaab Kekkuon, praise his name--he had invented himself into the form of man and was punished for it, but lived out his future immortal life as a man. So I suppose it would take some self-invention to make myself a man... But in a way, I've done that... Hmm... Though there was that one time I was transformed into a female succubus. It was interesting.

Gaius: When my body erupted into this world, it may have been deemed of another sex, but I am all man! After all, that's what I've carved this body into. I have the scars to prove it. I don't believe I was disgraced for this choice in my mortal life. At the very least, the people who mattered most to me, they knew I was a man. Well, that doesn't mean I can't shapeshift into something else if I feel the urge. I've been known to turn into women--actually, let's end the conversation here.

🫁 yuri or yaoi?

Altai has the big-hands-big-guy nature of yaoi but Gaius has the inherent tragedy of yuri.

👛 what is always with this character?

Altai: Basically always seen with his satchel (tome, inks, pigments, brushes, pens). Gaius also hangs around with him often enough to count. Also keeps wearing the stone as a memento.

Gaius: After the woman he fell in love with disappears, he keeps her bandana with him, always.

🦇 biggest material fear (ie heights, bugs etc)

Altai doesn't like it when things pop up out of nowhere and scare him. He's got a bit of a weak heart for that. Gaius has a dual fear/attraction to long, golden hair. It makes him think of his old best friend, who he loves, but he also misses dearly. Fear and desire are intertwined you know.

🪱 would this character move a worm off the pavement or save it?

Yes. Altai would feel bad for it if it was drying up, and would try to saturate it with some of his water before finding a suitable mud patch for it to burrow in. Gaius would briefly consider eating it but then would choose to save it.

🐞 does this character have any notable accent or dialect? what about other languages?

Altai: He's from the Isle of Raum in the New World. He has a deep accent that isn't really similar to any found in the other continents (I'd equate it to a Slavic accent). He knows an ancient language that was used in his tomes and can speak it fluently. This also means he can understand old-speak characters like Urianger very well.

Gaius: He's from an unknown place. His accent is a bit of a neutral mish-mash of all the places he's been (ending up with a vague, rough-American equivalent).

🦑 any pets?

Altai has Edme, his personal Chocobo. He makes good friends with all sorts of critters and is sometimes secretly spotted taking care of strays.

Gaius doesn't have any pets. He is the pet.

🛡️how does this character protect themself and others?

Altai is mainly a tank. You already know how this goes.

Gaius will sacrifice his own mutated flesh for others. He can't die.

🪓 would they make it to the end in a horror movie?

Altai would hopefully survive. If not, he'd die protecting others. Gaius would be genre-aware and become a bigger threat.

⚖️ how do they seek justice?

Altai will try his best to go the reasonable route. Gaius is the one who takes Altai's true heart and will forcibly rend justice from the hands of the oppressors if he has to.

[erin-bo-berin]

i have a request for dustin’s sister! maybe reader and steve used to date during his douchey phase, and they had a bad break up, but he falls completely and irrevocably back in love with her while they save hawkins multiple times, and dustin finds out and he’s super protective, ‘cause steve broke her heart rlly bad once, and maybe steve sees that he rlly hurt her previously, and then it’s fluffy because reader finds out and they get together because she assures him he’s changed and she’s proud of him? i’m very sorry if this was confusing, i had legitimate brain rot when i sent this in,,

thank you! i love your fics so much! <33

Thank you for reading! I love you 🥰

Also can you imagine protective Dustin? That’s so sweet 🥺 I had to use this gif cause I imagine the reader overhearing their conversation and is shocked to realize that Steve has feelings for her because she thought it was a one sided thing.

Take Care Of Her

Steve Harrington x Henderson!Reader & Dustin

“Absolutely not,” Dustin said firmly, arms crossed.

Steve looked at him, exasperated and bewildered.

He’d thought he’d do the gentlemanly thing and ask Dustin’s permission to date you, his older sister—again.

Steve had actually dated you once before, back in high school during what he, not so fondly called the Dark Ages. That would be when he was King Steve, grade A asshole and womanizer. He treated hearts like they were made of plastic or some other material that was a whole lot more durable than the glass they usually are—especially when it came to women. He did whatever he pleased not caring who he hurt in the process: bullying, leading girls on, dumping them, you name it.

He wasn’t proud of those days.

Especially since you had been one of his worst victims.

You didn’t fall to his feet when he first perused you and it intrigued him. In fact, he loved the chase. You were a challenge and it was something different than having girls throw themselves at him. But, you eventually wore down and he won you.

He just fucking sucked at keeping you.

Unfortunately, you fell hard for him while at the same time, Steve was growing bored. He’d got what he wanted, but it wasn’t satisfying anymore. He ended up dumping you, breaking you heart into a million little pieces.

The amount of times your little brother had caught you crying in the months that followed was absolutely pathetic. But, he never teased you. He hugged you and let you know that it would eventually be okay. That life would go on without Steve.

It eventually did. Until he showed back up in your life after you’d gotten over him—or at least you thought you’d had.

Steve and Dustin had formed an unlikely friendship after things started going haywire in Hawkins. First, an unassuming pet Dustin had found had turned out to grow and run off, turning into a creature from a whole other dimension.

The shock on your face had most likely been comical when you’d first found the unlikely pair—your brother and Steve. It was awkward at first and you were stiff, not sure how to act around him.

But, he’d changed. He wasn’t the old King Steve, the one who seemed to care about no one but himself. He was helping your 12 year old brother, after all, who at the time he didn’t really know. That was pretty selfless.

When you’d had a moment alone from Dustin, he apologized about what had happened in high school and how much he had hurt you. You’d shrugged it off, telling him it was fine.

Deep down though, the spark of feelings for him had been lit.

Summer of 1985 came and somehow you ended up back in the “saving the world” business with Dustin and Steve. Along this time was new friends Robin and Erica, but you had to admit that you had the worst luck when it came to being stuck with your ex-boyfriend.

When Robin had found out, she had teased you relentlessly about being stuck with the two exes, constantly mentioning that you two were idiots if you both couldn’t see what she did.

Once again, you had been stuck with Steve as you, he and Robin were kidnapped by Russians. Steve was tortured, making that well deep down in your heart that was starting to fill with emotions towards him, starting to overflow. You had been concerned and worried, probably more so than a friend should’ve been.

Things were a mess after you’d been tripping on drugs they gave you. You very faintly remember him kissing you—on the lips—but it was never mentioned, so you figured it was the drugs playing tricks on you.

That tiny spark from before had caught fire, turning into a low flame. But still, you’d refused to admit it.

Five months later and of course, shit got weird in Hawkins again, cause when does it ever not?

The universe shoved you and your ex, along with your brother back together to fight a new villain from the Upside Down. This one was bigger, badder and so much more vicious than you’d ever experienced.

As if the constant being around Steve hadn’t been torture enough, you’d all but written your feelings for him on a billboard for him to see when you instantly went diving after him when he got pulled into an underwater gate to the other dimension.

You didn’t hesitate and went in after him, panicking when you found him being strangled and attacked by demobats. You fought like hell to get them off of him and he was pretty impressive himself, taking a bite out of one then slamming it to the ground, stepping on it and pulling it apart.

He had been badly injured and you tried to help him later after he had a bout of dizziness from the blood loss. You tore material from your shirt, wrapping it around his torso tightly to staunch the bleeding.

He had been shirtless and mere inches from you as he’d peered at you, gratefully. You hadn’t been this close to him in years and you could no longer deny it.

That flame had turned into a fire that burned bright and you’d fallen once again for Steve Harrington.

Which is why you were now huddled on the stairs, listening to Dustin’s and Steve’s conversation below you in the basement. You’d just been on a return trip from the kitchen to grab a bottle of water, when you’d heard what they were talking about: you. You’d frozen and hadn’t moved as you continued to listen to what they were talking about.

“Why not? I didn’t have to ask you for your permission to ask her out,” Steve said, “I could’ve done it anyway, I just wanted to be a gentleman about it.”

“You broke her heart when she was sixteen, Steve,” you heard the gruff tone in Dustin’s voice, “Why do you think I’d let you do that again?”

“Because I’m not that same guy,” Steve said, “I was a complete asshole, I know it. But I’ve fallen in love with her, dude. I mean it’s kinda hard not to when you’ve been through all the shit we have, but still. I wish I’d taken the time to get to know her in high school. That’s my biggest regret.”

Dustin sighed heavily.

“Come on little bro, I think he sounds genuine, what about you?” you finally spoke, making yourself known as you came down the stairs.

They whipped around, looking shocked to have been discovered.

“You heard?” Dustin asked.

“I heard,” you smiled faintly, glancing at Steve.

“Fine,” Dustin relented, “But if you hurt her again, I’m coming after you,” he grumbled, jogging up the stairs, leaving you two alone.

“You really aren’t the same guy,” you said honestly, looking at Steve, “In case you were still hesitant about it. That guy from high school would not do half the shit you’ve done in the last few years. Help my brother, love and care for a group of kids, risk your life for his loved ones. You’re nothing like him anymore, Steve.”

You’d never seen Steve look so shy, you didn’t think he even knew what shy was. But he tentatively reached for your hand, pulling you to him.

“I was an idiot, Y/N Henderson and I realize it. I fell irrevocably in love with you and I really hope you feel the same because I want you to be my girlfriend. If that’s okay with you?”

He bent, studying your face. You were grinning, nodding your head.

“Completely fine with me,” you chuckled.

You reached up to him, finally being able to kiss him after dreaming about it for the last two years.

“Keep it PG down there!” Dustin hollered from upstairs.

You broke away, bursting out laughing.

“He doesn’t have anything to worry about,” Steve whispered to you, “Because this time, I’m going to take care of you.”

[mizutori-heiko]

Mizutori’s bakudeku fanfiction master list [complete works]

Really really good writing by these incredible authors. In no particular order! These are all Top!Bakugou and Bottom!Deku. If A/B/O dynamics then it’s Alpha!Bakugou and Omega!Deku. Yes, I have preferences.

Canon World – until 15k

What The Fuck Did You Just Call Me? by reading_raindrop | 8,303 | Izuku starts calling him Bakugou and it pisses the explosive teen off a lot more than he thought it would.

Oh right, you were a little sh*t by SaysiWrites | 5,653 | When Midoriya Izuku gets hit by an age-reversion Quirk, the last thing anyone expected to find out is that Toddler-Izuku is a little shit. Except for one Bakugou Katsuki, who has seen this phase one too many times already. (Bonus+ the entire Little Sh*t (Kidfic) series)

Do Not Disturb by surveycorpsjean | 10,010 | Apply enough force, and something is bound to break.

And Atlas fell by supercrunch | 15,185 | They move in together, after a while. Katsuki joins Best Jeanist and Izuku trains under Gran Torino. They still take comfort in each other every day, curl up in bed and kiss and talk about how life is going. Their live are tumultuous, after all, what with villains and training and rescuing people every week. It’s nice to have something certain. At the end of a day filled with violence and adrenaline, Izuku knows he can come home to someone concrete. It’s perfect. Being a hero is scary and grueling and uncertain, but this part is just right. And then, one day, a child dies in Izuku’s arms.

be loved by bonnia | 5,403 | The kidnapping incident leaves bakugou traumatised about being touched on the back of his neck, and midoriya decides to take matters into his own hands.

Big Protein by Mysecretfanmoments | 13,683 | Bakugou Katsuki has a thriving hero career, an agent to manage his famous attitude, and absolutely zero romantic interest in anyone. With the exception of his favourite health food joint refusing to expand to his city, his life is pretty damn perfect—so why does a viral video revealing Deku's stash of dirty mags involving him and Deku together turn everything upside-down?

Chocolate cake and resin preserved flowers by Anoksun | 11,396 | Izuku loses his memories. Katsuki struggles not to lose Izuku too.

Twin Stars by theperksofbeinglarissa | 8,435 | When Deku saves a woman's life, her quirk is accidentally activated. Her quirk? She reveals a person's soulmate. A star-shaped mark appears on Midoriya's left arm... and on Bakugou's as well. Kirishima is the only one who knows that Bakugou is Midoriya's soulmate, and Bakugou isn't taking the news very well. Can the twin stars of class 1-A work out their differences and find their happy ending?

Unhealthy Fixations by Thesis | 12,522 | Izuku is an adult who knows better than to crush on his childhood bully. AND YET.

Like the Moon by osakakitty | 14,781 | Katsuki Bakugo is having constant, erotic dreams about Izuku Midoriya. He isn’t sure why, but they won’t go away. In order to make them stop, he needs to figure out what Izuku Midoriya means to him.

Worth a Second Shot by cinnabee | 13,080 | Katsuki and Izuku celebrate registering as a Hero Duo together with a big party. What could go wrong?

Like Something Out of A Shoujo Manga by Merrywetherweather | 2,971 | Deku ends up in a rather interesting quirk accident, one that triggers flag events as if he were the protagonist of an otome game.

Canon World – 15k++

Blood Moon by lalazee | 94,860 | The Thank-Fuck-We-Aren’t-Dead Sex had started then, and had never really stopped. Then came the feelings and the fights. The ego, the pride, the jealousy. And then there was Us.

The Way You Used To Do by edema_ruh | 669,463 | During a battle, Midoriya gets hit by a villain whose quirk detaches his soul from his body. Stuck in a ghost-like state, the boy enters a race against time in order to save himself from permanently dying. Much to his luck - or lack of it -, the only person who can see and talk to him in this state is no one other than Kacchan.

Just Like Breathing by MD_Daydreamer | 35,423 | Izuku got engaged. He didn't mind. If that made Uraraka happy, he could do it. He thought his life wouldn't change much.But then, Kacchan went to live in the USA.

briar roses (and hundred years of sleep) by vannral | 15,951 | In which Izuku is hit by a ‘Sleeping Beauty’ Quirk, Class 3-A tries to find his True Love and get them to kiss him, and Katsuki’s very angry about it all.

"what's your type?" by sapphicflower | 20,192 | In order to increase their popularity rankings as up and coming pro heroes, Izuku and Katsuki participate in the most popular late night talk show for hero duos - ‘Heroes Rising!’. They’re killing it, obviously, because they know each other from inside and out. Until one question stumps the two of them: “What is your hero partner’s type?”

and it was Just Right by cinnabee | 23,759 | Katsuki spends two years post-graduation in a furious one-sided competition with his childhood friend and rival's promotional photos - until they finally run into each other, and, well. You shouldn't believe everything you see in magazines. A love story about size differences.

Notice Me, Nerd by useless_donut | 40,000 | Bakugou is in love with Midoriya. He doesn’t hide it, in fact it’s so painfully obvious that the entire class of 3-A has him figured out in a matter of months (days, in some cases). Too bad Midoriya is the most oblivious motherfucker out there, and Bakugou is too damn stubborn to actually ask him out. A love story as witnessed by the class of 3-A.

in your dreams, nerd! by sapphicflower | 37,639 | In a strange and unexpected set of circumstances, Izuku and Katsuki find themselves sharing their dreams together whenever they happen to fall asleep at the same time. Being hopelessly in love with each other, they don’t mind it all that much. What better way to spend time with your crush than in a stupidly vivid dream?

Hear Me by my_name_is_Levi | 22,419 | It wasn’t as if nightmares were uncommon for the freshman class of Yuuei. They’d seen plenty of things, heard and felt and witnessed enough travesty in their lives to last them a lifetime. But Midoriya Izuku was screaming, and no one, not even Bakugo Katsuki could ignore it.

Bridges by supercrunch | 18,018 | Bakugou is signed up for a Calvin Klein modeling gig. The thing is, they really do need the money. And Katsuki's technically the leader of this bunch of morons, so he finds himself taking the job even though his pride will never recover. And even though nobody thought to tell him that he'd be working with his ex-boyfriend. You know, the cute freckled guy from high school who went and broke his heart. So, yeah. This whole situation kind of sucks.

objective truth by mamalade | 15,390 | Izuku gets hit with a truth quirk, as one does. He seems to be handling it well—until Katsuki shows up.

catharsis by dollcewrites | 15,071 | It's been six years since Izuku graduated.It's been six years since he confessed to his childhood friend; his classmate and his inspiration. It's been six years since he deleted Bakugou's number, asked his friends not to mention the name, spent every last effort of his heart turning off the TV and averting his eyes from the newspapers. It's been six, long, long years since he gave up on Katsuki Bakugou ever loving him back.

Here here, my friends and me (You are my familia) by Jeka | 128,832 | Bakugou Katsuki has made a great job of ignoring the fact that he is tragically in love with Deku, someone who could never love him like that and let's face it, he doesn't deserve. Now that he can't ignore it anymore, he has to find a way to keep his childhood friend and move on for his own sake. Or so he had thought, maybe he can have Deku, after all. Izuku has everything he always wanted in life. But suddenly he has to navigate the most important relationship in his life through different eyes.

Canon World – Jealous! 

Hands Off by SaysiWrites | 7,140 | When a new girl at school starts flirting with Bakugou, his friends quickly become invested in the idea of their friend experiencing love - even if he doesn't seem at all interested in her. What they don't see is Midoriya fuming in the background. But how can he get rid of her when they've spent so long keeping their relationship a secret?

Surfaces by surveycorpsjean | 25,225 | Katsuki has a new girlfriend, but something isn't right. As impossible as it is, Izuku can't help but wonder what it'd be like to be called Katsuki's girl.

Green-Eyed Beast by SecretKiwi | 4,721 | Everyone wants a piece of Katsuki Bakugou, but they should beware of the Green-eyed beast always lurking close behind him.

Green with Envy by Sol_Morales707 | 2,611 | Izuku Midoriya is not as innocent and pure as everyone thinks he is. The truth was he was very jealous and willing to do anything for a certain blonde.

Happy Camper by Arysa | 7,074 | Wanting a break from the stress of dealing with the rookie Pro Hero grind, a handful of students from Class A decide to go on a camping trip. Izuku's excited to relax and catch up with everyone, especially Kacchan. But, well, Kacchan's... Kacchan. And dating Kirishima.

How to stop time: kiss by Teddingtons | 31,693 | Deku finally asks Uraraka out. Everyone's supportive except Bakugou who can't even look him in the eye. Deku seeks him out after and is hit with truth.

What I Deserve by s_the_queen | 16,671 | When Izuku starts dating a student in General Studies, everyone is happy for him. She's super sweet and really caring. But something doesn't sit right with Katsuki.

Deku's Already Fucking Taken by asdfjkl129 | 20,704 | 5 times people don't realize that Deku is already in a very happy relationship and try their hand at asking him out, and then in Bakugou's unique and special style, get very firmly corrected, +1 time where no correction is needed.

His by sister_elric | 6,206 | Izuku would like to consider himself a pretty level headed individual. Sure, he had the occasional tunnel vision, especially when it came to training. And hero work. And Kacchan. But, overall, Midoriya felt as though he typically kept his cool. Well, maybe that was a stretch. But, at the very least he could understand his own emotions. So, it surprised even him when an unfamiliar emotion coursed through him as a first year approached his boyfriend, Katsuki.

Down the Red Line by MinervaHope | 7,804 | Izuku has been able to see the red strings of fate since birth. It's no surprise that his is connected to Katsuki.

Canon World – Fake Relationship Goes Wrong

how he should’ve known (and how it turned out) by vannral | 43,918 | In which Katsuki and Izuku pretend to be a couple to avoid journalists, the plan backfires magnificently because of course it does, and the act goes on. Includes feelings, pining, domestic fluff and jealousy.

Vicious by feelslikefire | 105,173 | Midoriya and Bakugou wind up in the very last position either of them thought they'd be in: Hero Partners. It's not fun, but they learn to cope. Their first big assignment together takes them undercover to infiltrate a cult, but the situation turns out far more sinister than they first thought.

What I can never tell you by Mikacrispy | 27,067 | After living in the US for 5 years, Izuku returns to take care of a concussed Bakugou who believes they're engaged. Now, Izuku has to pretend he's in a relationship with the man he's loved for most of his life, knowing that it's just a matter of time until Katsuki gets better and realizes it's all a lie.

Not-Dating by MiraChaDoodles | 14,290 | Katsuki takes Deku on a not-date to save his career, only to find himself wishing it were real.

we'll do the things that lovers do by ethereals | 29,544 | Izuku gets an invitation to Shouto's wedding and Katsuki is PISSED that he asks Kirishima to be his date (also he wasn't even fucking invited

Canon World – Friends With Benefits (?) 

Four Times Bakugou Katsuki Doesn't Intend to Sleep With Midoriya Izuku (And the One Time that He Does) by fallingraine85 | 17,601 | He hadn’t planned for any of this. He isn’t about to go delving into the ball of yarn that is Midoriya Izuku’s heart; he isn’t equipped to try and untangle and make sense of it all. He isn’t about to try to analyze how he’s feeling about all of this, either.... How many times can you repeat the same mistake?

We Wear Chains on the Weekend by surveycorpsjean | 35,086 | Well, in a day of revelations, it turns out that Izuku isn't as vanilla as Katsuki previously thought. Unfortunately, that fascinating discovery is overshadowed by Izuku's dumbassery, because he has zero concept of aftercare."Don't go to anyone else," Katsuki says, because screw it. He can do a better job anyways. Or; Katsuki finds Izuku on a bad drop.

Just for Now by Shiro_Kabocha | 48,135 | Katsuki's parents are out of town over a school break and to keep him from getting up to any shenanigans, they ask Izuku to house sit with him. What are two teenaged boys to do when left alone to their own devices? (Bonus+ the entire Just for Love series)

safe in the darkness by yoonskisses | 20,855 | Izuku and Katsuki had been meeting up secretly for months, with absolutely no feelings involved. Or so Katsuki thought at least. The dorm gossip about Ochaco and Izuku's new relationship seemed to set a spanner in the works for their arrangement.

Alternative Universe – No Quirks

Bluebird by EtherealBeing | 53,108 | Dialing a wrong number was no unusual occurrence. Everyone did it once in a while, and Katsuki was well aware of that fact. However, possessing this knowledge made it no less aggravating for him to discover — a full two minutes into his rant about his day — that he’d been venting his frustrations to a complete stranger. As if that wasn't enough, said stranger was also inexplicably determined to hear his story to its end.

Someone Borrowed by mynameis152 | 138,996 | It felt like hours that he stared at Izuku, coming to terms with the fact that a man, his childhood best friend, whom he hadn’t seen since their senior year of high school, was there in front of his very eyes. Then his brows furrowed and his jaw clenched before he uttered through gritted teeth the very name Izuku had longed to hear for years. “Deku.”

Dark Side of the Sun by Synnie | 51,598 | Staying up too late playing video games, Kirishima wasn't expecting to get an urgent call begging for help. Next thing he knew, he was letting his classmate Izuku Midoriya take refuge in his apartment - without consulting his always angry roommate.

Manage Me by Justaperson1718 | 10,756 | Izuku becomes Katsuki’s model agent.

Don't Set Your Drink Down by Crandberrycrush | 88,424 | With sudden clarity Izuku realized he had broken the first rule of going out. Never leave your drink unattended.

Livewire by pretty_rekless | 18,160 | Per Ochako's request, Izuku downloads a gay dating app in hopes to finally find a partner. Except every single one of his leads keep ghosting him or standing him up... That is until one hot, fiery blond enters the chat. Grindr/Tinder AU fic.

Drinking Watermelon by warschach | 8,906 | Katsuki works as a camp counselor, and Izuku is a boy made of summer heat and sunlight.

Precious Pet by Mikacrispy | 6,379 | When broke college student Midoriya Izuku found a job that offered lodging, food, and good pay for four hours of work each day, he thought it was too good to be true. But he called anyway. Turns out all he has to do is to be the spoiled little puppy of a rich businessman.

Our Eleven Summers by Dark_Mage_Ayumu | 34,472 | The first time Katsuki met Izuku was when he was eight. For the next eleven years, Izuku changed his life, and no one even knew. Their relationship was something they shared in secret.

sticky note crushes by ladyofsnails | 3,239 | Katsuki hates his roommate. The green-haired, freckled, artsy son of a bitch with his dumb pun t-shirts and paint-stained hands he can’t fucking keep to himself. Katsuki can’t leave a single assignment or paper out in his room because that idiot will just grab anything to draw on it. He’s like a shark that can’t stop swimming else it’ll die – he can’t stop drawing. Ever.

Don't Play Pretend by SweetSide | 10,103 | Actor AU: Deku and Bakugou get the leading roles for an upcoming TV Drama. They weren’t aware that they would be working with each other for who knows how long. It would’ve been completely fine if they weren’t exes.

97.6 FM by jamjars | 32,249 | Izuku can’t stop listening to the radio host with the deep voice who sounds like he’s stuck in 2010. It’s a harmless crush. That is until he starts calling into the show under the pseudonym Deku.

Read {between} Your Lines by greatcloudninja | 52,252 | Midoriya Izuku, up-and-coming actor, has finally hit his big break (...), Bakugou Katsuki, who has been acting for over twenty years.However, Bakugou seems to have it out for Izuku, leading to tension both on and off set. When some incriminating photos surface, the studio suggests (...): having Bakugou and Midoriya fake a relationship to get ahead of the rumors. 

I’m not looking for somebody with some superhuman gifts by PassingShadow | 5,522 | Izuku is a professional cuddler and Katsuki is his new client that’s just a little rough around the edges, and needs a natural healing touch.

Alternative Universe – Quirkless Deku

A Good Old-Fashioned Tattoo AU by lalazee | 14,437 | After their paths had split, Bakugou & Deku meet again as adults. While Bakugou begins to repent for the kid he used to be, he also starts to prove himself as he the man he is now.

Call Me a Safe Bet (I'm Betting I'm Not) by WTTTD | 10,803 | He wished he had some sort of heads up before seeing Deku again for the first time after nearly two years, looking like the essence of a lazy Sunday, smiling and surrounded with brand new, adoring friends. It was a little fitting that Katsuki burned for him so badly. (Support Department Deku)

In Which Kacchan Has a Ruff Time by OneshotPrincess | 14,511 | Bakugou Katsuki gets quirked into a dog, gets adopted by an unknowing Izuku and generally has a very rough few days full of realizations

While You Were Sleeping by Belkacaramelka (annabelleg) | 71,197 | The one where quirkless fanboy Midoriya Izuku rescues Pro Hero Todoroki Shouto, gets mistaken as his fiancé while he is in a coma, and gets caught up in the most unlikely fake engagement... until his childhood enemy and Todoroki's classmate Bakugou Katsuki tries to catch him out, and they both end up discovering a lot more about each other than they'd expected.

Let Me Assist You Personally by Seeress | 32,806 | Izuku is long-suffering Personal Assistant to #1 Pro Hero Dynamight.Dynamight can't keep a PA to save his career. They all quit crying after a few days weeks. Enter, Izuku—with enough money problems to brave the jaws of the cranky beast. Childhood friend turned glorified paid slave. Somehow it all works out. ‘Kill them with kindness’, his mom had told him once. If that were true, Bakugou Katsuki would be stone-cold dead by now.

Smile For The Camera by kurokonekokilled | 19,179 | Midnight has a cam site, home to millions of users, but one catches Katsuki's eye when he goes scrolled through it in search for something to help him release a little stress. A live stream and the best orgasm of his life later, his wallet is lighter, and he might be almost as obsessed with this Deku guy as the cam boy is with him.

Just Like The Comics by brichibi | 24,935 | Where Izuku works at a comic book shop because that’s as close to a hero as he’s gonna get, and Katsuki plays the part of heroic ex-boyfriend who is good at everything except winning Izuku back... maybe

Alternative Universe – Quirks

Get on my Level by Mikacrispy | 92,273 | Bakugou Katsuki is a Pro Hero whose boss demands him to take an intern. Midoriya Izuku is a UA student who needs an internship. When the two of them are put together, they learn about what it truly means to be a Hero and what it means to be in love.

A/B/O – Secret! Baby

Home by Emerald2402 | 87,214 | Midoriya Izuku left Japan in a rush, moving to America without a word to anyone else. But then almost 11 years later he arrives back Home and Bakugou Katsuki's Alpha is furious. Fuck that, Bakugou is furious, because Midoriya Izuku, an omega he tasted one time, has been keeping a very big, very blonde haired, green eyed secret.

Those Under the Same Stars by PerpetuallyPerturbed | 325,553 | When Katsuki Bakugo left Izuku Midoriya five years ago, he thought it was for forever. He put aside dreams and wishes of the omega to focus on his career. He was going to be the best hero, after all. He couldn't have an omega getting in his way. So when he's stopped on the streets one day by a pup begging for help for his mom, he isn't prepared to face what he gave up, and what the consequences of his actions were. (Quirkless Deku)

A/B/O – Quirks

Mark Me. Make Me Yours. by decadentbynature | 10,062 | Midoriya is the only Omega at UA and he's been hiding it well but there's one issue that threatens to expose him: his attraction to an Alpha, Bakugo. After being told to give some paperwork to Bakugo, Midoriya lets him into his dorm room and is immediately overwhelmed by his scent. Unable to help himself, he gives in to his urges, only to be discovered by Bakugo but instead of becoming enraged, Bakugo decides to give Midoriya exactly what he wants

Claim Me by ScientificallySinful (VampireGaaraCheesepuffs) | 114,449 | Being an Alpha has nothing to do with Katsuki's success as a Pro-Hero, the same way Deku's Omega status hasn't kept him from becoming Number Two. Secondary gender doesn't mean anything nowadays and “mating” is an antiquated practice. So when Izuku, his rival, asks Katsuki to Claim him in the middle of the night, there is only one logical thing to say. “What the fuck?”

Change of Plans by Mikacrispy | 185,965 | Alpha Pro Hero Bakugou Katsuki never planned to get married to some random omega but what he wants isn't an option anymore. One for All wielder Midoriya Izuku has suffered injustice too many times and doesn't plan in allowing his secondary gender to dictate how he must live his life. Falling in love was never in the plans.

Going Feral For You by ANGIE_fic | 17,977 | Bakugou has an aggression problem that might have to do with his Alpha. His job is on the line because of it. So what do you do with a pent up Alpha? Yes.Rut. (Quirkless Izuku)

i live for you, i long for you by jeonjeonggukkkkkie | 19,165 | The five times Izuku hinted he wants Katsuki to spend his next heat with him, and the one time Katsuki took the hint.

Baby's First Bloom by ContraryBee | 44,945 | Izuku blooms for Katsuki one warm day in their third year of middle school. What follows is both boys learning about themselves, their bond, and the society they live in.

As Fate Would Have It by ScientificallySinful (VampireGaaraCheesepuffs) | 88,737 | Katsuki Bakugo had plenty of reasons why he wasn't mated yet, not that he was going to explain why to just anyone. But now, Ground Zero was running out of time. If he didn't find someone soon, he'd lose his position as a Pro-Hero and he'd never get to be #1. So, when he finds out there's a male Omega recently arrested for prostitution that's headed to prison if he too doesn't get a mate…well it must be fate. (Quirkless Izuku)

A/B/O – No Quirks

Gravity by warschach | 71,477 | Izuku is back in his hometown and plenty hasn't changed much from the 8 years he was gone. Except, Katsuki Bakugou, the alpha king of their small town. He's hotter- because that's fair, right, God? -, stronger, a now-famous pro fighter, and noticeably nicer this round.Not that he cares, pfft. (Fine, he cares.)

Nine Months by greatcloudninja | 23,303 | Omega Midoriya Izuku connects with Alpha Bakugou Katsuki through an online singles ad. Izuku pays Katsuki to help him with his heat, ending up pregnant in the process. What follows is a pregnancy filled with ups and downs, but whatever hurdles come their way, they can make it through together.

The long dark by Ominous-Anonymous (Ominonymous) | 13,289 | He could have been really dangerous. He could be a fucking murderer for all he knew. But Izuku Midoriya, ever the reckless daredevil, was not thinking of that when he got into a car with a complete stranger. Completely ignoring the part where his mother always taught him to never gets into cars with alphas he didn't know...

[shurisneakers]

harmless (viii)

Summary: Bucky volunteers to go stop a small time villain, but nothing can prepare him for what exactly he has to deal with. (Bucky x villain!reader, drabble series)

Warnings: cursing, protesting, frustrated bucky, dramatic reader, gamer (derogatory), smidge of angst

Word count: 3.5k

A/N: listen idk what goes on at construction site and im too sexy to research so we’re going with my version of the world. hello. how are we all doing?

here’s my ko-fi if you’d like to support my writing <333

Previous Part || Series Masterlist

He doesn’t expect to see you on TV. 

In jail maybe, for something scandalous and completely unnecessary, but not TV.

But there you are, a sign board waving around furiously in your hand, voice in protest against the demolition of the community centre. You’re flipping the board back and forth to alternate between the messages you’ve scrawled on the cardboard.

You were among a few protesting, but clearly the loudest. 

He thinks that maybe he has the weekend off if you’re too busy fighting big corporations. He’d send his support even.

Until he zeroes in on the sign when it flips over, finally reading what it says.

You better get your ass here, sarge

And so he does.

Half the crowd had dipped by the time he arrived. You were there, still the loudest, but he couldn’t help but notice the lack of people as compared to an hour or two ago on TV. He supposed that justice could wait as long as it took to get lunch from the nearest café.

“I can’t stop you from protesting, y’know.” He’s a little wary of approaching your raging self. 

“Oh, hey Barnes. You got my message.” You break away for a second to scream a bunch of obscenities at the gigantic glass building before turning to him. “You wouldn’t be able to.”

“What’s your dumb plan then?” 

“First of all, it’s not dumb. It’s stupid. Put some respect on my technological genius.” You held up a finger. “Second of all, it’s not here.”

“Where is it?” 

“At the construction site.” You point down the road. “Come on.”

Right along the way you stop to chant another slogan. He waves his arm around meekly in support. He did, after all, have to stand up for what was right, but if his publicist saw him here she’d have an aneurysm. 

The construction site isn’t very far off. It’s adjacent to the community centre, which he assumes they’re going to tear down to make more space for whatever shitty commercial building was going to take its place.

There are already a few excavators and dozers there but no one to man them since it was lunch time. What garners his attention is the small silver plate that’s on the floor a few feet ahead in the direction you’re walking towards.

“Here.” You stop once it nears. “The plan.”

“Am I supposed to know what this is?” He lightly kicked at it, earning a smack on the arm from you.

“Stop that,” you scolded, “and look at it. It’s not hard to figure out.”

He narrows his eyes. There’s a small u-shaped piece of metal in the middle of the plate. “That’s a magnet.”

“Exactly.” You clapped your hands together in excitement. “The world’s strongest electromagnet.”

He looks around. The only possibly magnetic things are the cranes and excavators around him.

“You’re going to... stop the machines from moving ahead?” he hesitates in his deduction. 

“Yep. Can’t tear anything down if they can’t get to it first.” 

Bucky looks down.

“Does this thing even work?” He toes at it again. “It’s kinda small.”

“It works beautifully, stop kicking at it, you demon-”

“What happens if I step on it, huh?” He knows this would get on your nerves wonderfully. He raises his leg. “Do I get to go home for the day?”

“You’re such a little shit,” you whine, reaching for your back pocket. “Stop bullying my invention.”

“’m gonna squish it like a bug.” He’s only half kidding about that part. “I’m gonna-”

Before he can finish his sentence something yanks him down hard. His head nearly hits the ground before his right arm shoots out to break his fall.

"Woah there, don't go falling for me as yet.” 

“What the fu-” he begins, eyes locking on his metal arm that was pressed flat against the earth.

“I told you it works,” you say smugly. “Try crushing it now, Barnes. If you can even get off the floor.”

He tugs his hand but it’s firmly attached to the thing. No matter how or where he’s applying the effort, his limb refuses to move. He’s stuck.

“Turn it off,” he sighs. “You made your point.”

“No. Stay there.”

“Y/N, shut up and turn this off,” he groans, trying to find a better position rather than chin down on the ground.

“Lay there and rot. You deserve it for underestimating me.” You huff.

“I wasn’t underestimating you, Jesus Christ.” He really was planning to just step on it, but he had complete faith that it worked. 

When he doesn’t receive a reply, his gaze follows yours. Suddenly the crane looks a lot closer than it initially did. Awesome. 

“Those are moving towards me.” He picks up on the low groan and creak of metal.

“Yeah, they are.” You nod, one hand on your hip, watching them.

He didn’t think that getting crushed under construction equipment would be how his day went. 

“Not my problem,” you decide finally after a bout of silence. 

Now that simply wouldn’t do. 

Death was definitely a problem, but what was more important was that he was going to get a dust allergy from the mud. He could already feel the blocked nose and temperature incoming.

“Are you really going to waste this on me? Don’t you have a demolition to stop?” He manages to twist his body so that he’s lying on his back.

“Good point,” you squint into the distance at the whirring of the heavy machinery. Their owners wouldn’t be happy to find them missing from their original spot. “But I still can’t help you out.”

“You’re willing to sacrifice your-”

“I can’t help you out because I don’t have an off switch. Yet,” you add the last part in a hurry.

“Then when the fuck were you planning to build one?” He sits up, leaning on his elbow. The cranes weren’t a mini object on the horizon now; the closer they got, the faster they were starting to move towards him. 

“I don’t know, after they agreed not to take down the building?”

He could just detach his arm and come back for it later he but had no guarantee that you would stop here for the day or that the vibranium could withstand all that pressure. 

“You better make a switch right now and get me out of this, I don’t care how.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you grumbled, bending to assess how badly he was stuck. “You know, this thing runs really deep into the earth. It’d take forever to dig back up and then get you back to my lab and then build a switch.”

“How long?” He didn’t have a lot of time, clearly, but even generally he didn’t have the whole day to waste. He had a mission the next day. He had to put the fear of death into some Russians and bring some pirozhki back for Nat. 

“I don’t know,” you furrowed your eyebrows. “Too long for my schedule anyway, I have class prep to do.”

“Motherfucke- that thing’s like twenty feet away.” He’s worried about how you don’t look fazed at all when he points at the stupid machine.

He’s about to volunteer to detach his arm when he realises it’s definitely less than twenty feet now. He had a backup just in case. It didn’t move as smoothly, but who could tell the difference when a couple of tons of pressure was aiming for your face, and hell, if he explained his circumstances of the destruction of his arm to T’Challa-

“Okay, fine.” You reach into your backpack to grab something that looked like a wrist watch. It matched the one already around your hand. 

You reach over and clasp it around his hand before turning a dial on the side.

“You ready?” you ask, ignoring the large crane that was starting to charge towards you. 

“For what?” he replies, looking down at it. He can barely hear you over the sound of the whining of machinery.  

“Teleportation, baby.” You send him a big grin before slamming down on his watch.

“Huh-” His voice cuts off immediately. 

If there’s anything that can be said about teleportation, it’s that he feels like every atom in his entire body violently splits to float around briefly before suddenly rejoining again.  

The ground beneath him feels different, and it takes him a second to realise that he was on the floor of your lair. 

“What the fu-”

“Hello,” your voice comes from above him. 

“You can teleport.” It’s not difficult for him to look at you now without the sun in his face. His arm is still stuck to the magnet but since the giant rod it was attached to was no longer deep in the ground, he could lift the entire apparatus up relatively easily.

“What, like it’s hard?” You discarded your bag on the floor. “You good? Takes a while to get used to.”

He gives you a grunt in acknowledgement, shaking his arm to see if he had any luck. It didn’t budge.

“Come on, take a seat.” You gesture to a lab chair you’ve pulled up for him on the raised platform at the front of the room. He realises that this is the first time he’s properly seen what’s actually inside your lair.

There are various buttons that do God knows what, drawers and cabinets painted black, several computer screens and gigantic pillars of glass on either side of the set up that encapsulate some green bubbling liquid. There’s a giant television set up against the wall, divided into several screens.

“Whaddya think?” You do a small swoop of your arm to show off the place.

“Gamer,” he says simply, testing his luck.

“What did you just say to me?” you recoil instantly, disgust on your face.

“It’s a gamer set up.” He points a finger at the TV screen. He was told by Shuri to use it as an insult, but he wasn’t exactly sure why. It just felt appropriate. 

“Take that back right now.” You raise a finger accusatorially at him.

“No.” He was sticking with it even though he had no idea what exactly the context was.

“Fuck your arm,” you announce, throwing your hands up in surrender.

“Fuck your demolition then,” he replies simply, getting up from his place on the chair to leave with the thing still attached to him. 

He takes one step ahead before your voice rings out.

“Sit down, drama queen,” your voice calls from behind him. “God, you’re annoying.”

“You’re infuriating.”

“I’m the best part of your week,” you fire back, ”and also your only way out of this. Now sit down.”

He didn’t even need the second warning, he was already on the chair the first time around.

“I’m not going to build a switch to turn this off. It’d take too long,” you examine the piece of equipment with more gentleness than he was expecting, “I’m going to remove it instead. It’s gonna take a while, so you better get comfortable.”

“I’m not.”

“That’s so sad,” you say without any indication of wanting to help. 

He rolls his eyes.

You pull up next to him, welding glasses covering your face and the tool in your hand. 

He turns away when you start, making sure his face is not directly within its trajectory. 

He makes himself busy by looking around some more. There are details you’ve put into the place, materials that are non-flammable made up most of the architecture. It’s dramatic, sure, but somehow the designs and colours seemed to go together. It did look sinister, he’d give you props for that.

The space was quite big. It occurs to him only then that that’s how you manage to sneak up on him so often in the past. Everything clicked. Fucking teleportation.

“So,” your voice was raised to speak over the noise. “How’s it going?”

He decidedly doesn’t answer. His position is more than enough.

“Right.” You clear your throat. 

He takes to counting the tiles on the floor, figuring out how many were there from the raised platform to the wall of the entrance. 

“Not how you imagined your day to go, huh?” you continued despite his lack of response. “But some might say it’s a privilege to be spending the day with a cool, mad scie-”

“Are you going to keep talking?” he interrupts, losing his count on the floor.

“Yeah, duh,” you say like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “You got anything better to do?”

He didn’t. 

“What’s it like living with a bunch of superheroes?” You change course. He’s not sure if he’s really allowed to disclose top secret information. “I assume there’s a lot of protein shakes, talcum powder for the chafing-”

Then again, how much damage could you do by knowing that Steve preferred pancakes over waffles?

“It’s quiet,” he says. “Most of the time.”

“Save all your smart talking for the battlefield, huh?” 

He doesn’t reply. It’s quiet around the Tower. A lot of their energy goes towards missions and recuperating once they’re back. 

“You go on missions a lot?” 

“I can’t tell you that.”

“Boo, you whore,” you say with mock disappointment.

He got that reference.

“What’s your favourite food then?”

He scrunches his eyebrows.

“What?” The welding stops for a second while you look at him. “Don’t tell me that’s classified too.”

It’s not, he’s just never thought about it. 

“I don’t know,” he murmurs, “Pasta?”

“Vague, but I’ll take it.”

He used to boil a lot of pasta, from what he could remember of his days in hiding. Cheap and bought in bulk before he saved up enough to buy things like fruits. A lot of the times the amount of sauce he had access to was enough for maybe seasoning, not a whole component on its own. 

It’s one of the perks of being a free man in the 21st century he thinks, a steaming bowl of fettuccini drenched in sauce and garlic bread on the side. 

“What do you do in your downtime?”

“Nothing.” Well, he considers it to be a pass time and doing nothing is a full time gig. It takes effort to do nothing. He even has days dedicated to doing nothing, as suggested to him by his therapist.

“Really?” You sound a little surprised, although it’s hard to make out when you’re already speaking a lot louder than usual. “No shining your penny collection? No software update for this thing?” You tap at his arm. 

There really isn’t anything. Truth be told, he thinks he’s the most boring guy in the Tower. He sticks to himself, has a few succulents that he adores and occasionally watches trashy television. So then why are you so interested in him?

“You’re obsessed with me,” he says pointedly. “Why?”

You give a short laugh. “I think it’s the blue eyes, sarge, they’re really popping today. Gotta say, I’m loving this colour on you. Is it different from the black you wore last week? And from the one from the week before that?”

He looks down at his dark t-shirt and utility pants. He had other clothes but those were reserved for things that were not this.

“Or maybe it’s the grumpiness, I don’t know. I love it when someone shows absolutely no interest in me. Very sexy of you.” Oh jeez, you were going to continue. “Hell, maybe it’s the thighs-”

“Okay,” he interjects, feeling the need to count the tiles more than ever. He equates the heat in his neck from the welding going on beside him. 

The loudness of your laughter is clearer than the sound of metal on metal when you tug a large piece of the invention off. Things were moving fast. He could get back home to his Star Trek marathon and forget this day ever happened.

“You know, you’re more interesting than you think,” you pipe up casually. 

He doesn’t expect this and therefore he supposes he can’t stop the curiosity from enveloping his face. He hasn’t told you anything about himself, so then the inference you reached came out of nowhere.

Apparently, you take notice of the confusion on his face, even though he can’t see through the giant welding mask, because you let out a chuckle. 

“Oh, come on, really? You have no idea?” you ask lightly, pausing to see if he offers anything other than silence. “You’ve come back almost every week even though you know it’s a waste of your time, you always keep your promises and I know for a fact that if you wanted to stop me once and for all, you could have. But you’re not.”

He doesn’t realise you’ve stopped welding until you start again. Good, it gives him an excuse not to have to look at you after that. 

Frankly, he’s a little stunned.

You’re not looking at him, he can tell from his peripheral vision. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you have a small crush on me.”

At that, he’s forced to roll his eyes out of instinct. Thankfully you do know better.

A few screws out later, another piece comes out. You inform him that’s it’s going to get trickier from there since the circuit was a little more intricate, a lot more time than the original few pieces. He can see his Star Trek marathon fade away in the distance.

You ask him a few more questions. Some he answers with silence, others maybe a tidbit here and there. 

“How’s dating now compared to the forties?”

“Strange.” He purses his lips in thought. “One guy asked for a gym date. Didn’t know that was a thing.”

“How’d that turn out?” you laugh.

“He didn’t ask for a second one.” His Bumble matches with girls somehow had gone down since he cut his hair, but he’s not too bothered. Not like there was a huge shortage. 

He likes cats, thinks the worst merchandise that they make is the stupid baseball card with his face on it, and doesn’t have social media for the sake of his sanity. He’s seen the thirst tweets. 

Clearly, he’s revealed his deepest, darkest secrets. Utterly classified material. But he doesn’t know anything about you other than your name, number, address, where you teach, what your hobby is-

“You, uh-” he hesitates, “You got a favourite food?”

Your hands hold still to hover above what they’re working on. You fight back a smile. “Sure do.”

He asks a few more questions. Shuts up when he feels his social battery drain. That’s enough for the next month, he thinks.

The sun’s dipped down beyond the horizon by the time majority of the work is completed. Both of you have taken a few breaks to fight the feeling of stiffness that was creeping into your joints. 

You scoff and tell him you’re not planning to poison him when he denies the offer of a soda. He doesn’t deter in his decision.

“How much to go?” He has a mission tomorrow that he’d really like to get some sleep in before. Waking up at 3am to get ready was the worst part of the job. 

“Basically done.” You roll your chair back, rotating your shoulder and stretching your fingers. “There’s just this little part that I can’t access from this angle. How good are you at hanging upside down like a bat?”

Fuck it, he sighs to himself, it was almost finished anyway.

Bucky stands up, tilting his neck to the side slightly before pulling at a small latch under his arm, one so tiny that you’d never make out was even there unless you knew it existed. The arm releases from his shoulder with a small click.

He offers it to you, a piece of your magnet still attached to it.

Your eyes are slightly wide. He raises his eyebrows.

You don’t say anything, just accept it and flip it to a position you were comfortable with. It takes only a minute or two for the sound of the last piece hitting the floor to reverberate through the hall.

You give a small cheer. He lets out a tiny exhale in equal parts fatigue and relief.

“So,” you drawl, handing his arm back to him, “you could have just done that the whole time.”

He doesn’t reply, just slides it back onto his shoulder. 

“You had the option of leaving your arm here and coming back later to get it.” 

He gives it a few shakes, opens and clenches his fist shut a few times to make sure everything is working.

“You wanted to talk to me.”

He gives you a deadpan look. “I was distracting you.”

“Bullshit,” you laugh.

“Believe what you must.” He shrugs, turning around. “My job here is done regardless.”

“Oh, I believe alright,” you call out from behind him as he walks towards the entrance of your lair. “I believe you’re a sneaky bastard, Bucky Barnes.”

He doesn’t stop himself from smiling at the overdramatic gasp you give when he flips you a middle finger. From the metal arm, too. 

Next part

[helliontherapscallion]

(Y/n) and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Week: Thursday (Part 2)

Monday     Tuesday     Wednesday     Thursday (Part 1)     Friday     Saturday     Sunday

Spotify Playlist (collaborative)

Warnings: panic attacks, swearing, puking, concussions, mentions of injuries/bullying, homophobia

Word count: 5,138

After school, you were sitting on the couch as you furiously typed on your keyboard at an extremely fast pace. You were on a roll with these essays, they were probably going to be finished by the time you had to go back to the school to get on the bus with the team. You figured that you could even finish Annie’s essay and get started on Sammy’s US history presentation on the sociopolitical climate of the United States in the mid twentieth century to today. However, instead of covering a variety of topics like the rubric requested you to do, you were only going to talk about the significant events that happened to the LGBT+ community starting with Stonewall and going to Obergefell v. Hodges. You were also going to go in depth about how even if there are more opportunities available and more laws set in place to protect for LGBT+ people in the present then there were in past, members of the LGBT+ community still suffer heavy discrimination in the workplace and in the public. With receipts of course, the assignment required a minimum of three pictures per slide, and the group chat was a perfect source.

After that was done, you would email Sammy’s teacher (you had her last year for US history and you knew that she had a son in the grade below you currently transitioning from female to male) that you were the one that did her project and send screenshots of Sammy calling you slurs. Luckily for you, you had receipts of her being transphobic in the past that you could also send. Everything was effortlessly falling into place for you today. 

As you were typing, the front door swung open and two overly excited fifth graders ran into the house and up the stairs. A tired Schlatt followed them. “I will never know how the hell Phil keeps up with them.” 

“I dunno, maybe because he’s already raised three kids before.”

You watched as your uncle jumped and whipped his head over towards you, his hand clutching his chest. He lightly glared at you, “christ kid don’t do that, you nearly gave me a heart attack.”

You smirked at him before turning back to your laptop to continue typing the essay. You were almost done with the conclusion paragraph on Annie’s essay and you wanted to get to Sammy’s presentation as fast as possible. As you were typing, you felt a warm air fan across your neck and your uncle’s voice right next to your ear, “whatcha typin?”

You lept off the couch and almost fell into the coffee table before steadying yourself and deadpanning at Schlatt. “I was typing an essay before you interrupted me.”

He snorted, “it looked like you were on a roll, just thought I’d see what my beloved niece was writing. Can I read it?” 

Your eyes lit up as an excited grin split your cheeks, “yeah, but lemme catch you up real quick. Adrian, Sammy, and Annie got mad at me a few days ago and wanted me to do some homework for them as a sort of payment. But after they pulled that little stunt in the lunchroom yesterday, they decided to be little bitches to me and call me slurs. So naturally, I decided to change the essay prompt into an in depth analysis about discrimination LGBT people face from their peers on the daily. My english teacher’s really against homophobia and the project’s worth twenty five percent of our overall grade, so it’s perfect.”

While you were rambling on and on about your detailed plot for revenge, Schlatt couldn’t help but be proud of the person you’d become. A major part of him was impressed that you came up with a detailed plan so quickly, that meant that his cunning nature was rubbing off on you and that made him ecstatic. Sure you mentioning not being straight was new to him, but he was prepared to accept you for whatever you identified as. He didn’t care how people identified, he just cared if they were good people. And his niece was one of the best kids he knew. He’d let your slip up slide for now until you felt comfortable enough to properly come out to him. 

“That an amazing plan, fuckin brilliant. Though, you could do more.”

That piqued your interest, “I’m listening.”

“Do you have any blackmail?”

Your eyes glinted with sudden understanding, “why yes I do, uncle dearest. I just so happen to have thousands of texts from them talking shit about each other and basically the entire school. And them being incredibly racist. They would be destroyed if that came out.” 

“Two things. One, never call me that again. Two, perfect. Keep it as leverage if they try to do something. You don’t pull out all the good cards in the first round, you wait for the right moment to strike so you can win. You need to constantly defend yourself against other players and anticipate their every move. If you leak everything right now, you won’t have anything to use against them if they have something up their sleeve you didn’t know about. Patience is key in things like this.”

You absorbed every single word that came out of his mouth like it was the holy gospel. Although he was your uncle and you loved him with all your heart, but he was a sly bastard when he wanted to be. He knew his way around fighting and manipulating people just right, so you were incredibly happy that you were on his good side and he absolutely adored you. Though questionable and morally gray, he was giving you advice because he cared about you and you’d be an idiot to not heed his advice. 

“That’s genius, Uncle Schlatt. What would I do without you?”

“You’d get along just fine without me, you would’ve gotten there eventually. You’re smart. I’m just givin you a little push in the right direction.”

“I honestly would’ve never thought about waiting, I was so dead set on getting revenge that I would’ve just leaked everything all at once. I want them to feel how I felt when they were around me. I-” you paused. Would this make you the same as them? You’d be screwing up all their grades, Adrian’s job, and Sammy’s athletic career. You came to the chilling realization that you’d be the same as them. You’d be as manipulative as they were. “...Uncle Schlatt, would that make me the same as them?”

“Fuck no! You’re always gonna be better than them no matter what. When they’re at their best, you’re always gonna be a whole lot better than them. They deserve what’s happening to them, it sounds like they put you through so much shit the past few years. I actually think you could do a whole lot worse to them if you’re willing to put more work in, but it’s your plan and if you think that what you’re doing is too much,” he darkly chuckled, “you wouldn’t like my idea.”

“You’re right, they deserve everything I have planned for them. God, I don’t know what I was thinking, ‘would that make me the same as them,’” you mocked what you said earlier, “what a load of shit. Anyways, thanks Uncle Schlatt. I’m gonna get back to writing this. They’re due tomorrow and I wanna finish as much as I can before I have to go.”

“Alright, whaddya want for dinner? Phil’s gonna be like thirty minutes late from work so I’m cookin tonight.”

Oh no. No, no, no, no. That man can barley cook boxed mac n cheese, let alone anything else. He’d burn down the house if you left him alone in the kitchen with the stove. “On second thought, why don’t I help you with dinner? We can make some chicken alfredo.”

“Awe, you’d rather hang out with me than finish your homework? Ya really do love me. C’mon let’s start.”

The process of making dinner was… interesting. Multiple times, Schlatt almost spilled boiling water on himself and he even managed to burn the pasta while it was in the water. How he even managed to do that you’d never find out, you had your back turned cutting up vegetables and herbs at the time. That was when you subtly started to take over in the kitchen, giving him smaller tasks while you handled everything else. You felt bad for Tubbo, his father can’t cook for shit. 

By time you finished, about an hour passed and Philza had come home and changed out of his work clothes. The two adults sat at the table discussing something that you didn’t pay attention to while your brothers and cousin were in the living room waiting for you to finish dinner. Finally, you set the table and it was time to eat. 

Because you couldn’t have many fatty foods before any matches or practices, you had made a separate plate for yourself that only had plain pasta, chicken, and broccoli. You were surprised with how well it turned out, you were following an iffy recipe you found on the first link Google brought up. 

After dinner, you went upstairs to put your uniform on and pack a little bag full of things you might need: a small blanket, some snacks, a water bottle, and a portable charger. Oh, and fuzzy socks and a pair of crocs. You could never go wrong with fuzzy socks and crocs. Feeling a vibration in your pocket, you pulled out your phone.

Hales : )

(Y/n), I’m omw to your house

Gonna give you a ride to the school

(Y/n)

Hales you don’t have to give me a ride, I can drive

Hales : )

Don’t care

Omw, be there in like 7 mins

You swiped out of yours and her conversation and opened up the family group chat

(Y/n)

I don’t need a ride to the school, Haley’s giving me one

She’s gonna give me a ride home too

Dadza

Alright, thank her for me

Tell her I said good luck too!

Uncle Schlatty Patty

Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do

Dadza

(Y/n), do everything he wouldn’t do

Uncle Schlatty Patty

Fuck you I’m a good influence

Dadza

You’re really not

Wilby

^^^^

Technology Sword

^

Uncle Schlatty Patty

Fuck all of you 

You heard Haley’s car pull into the driveway and dashed out of your room with your bag. Just as you put your hand on the doorknob, a hand stopped you.

“Coat.”

You grumbled as you reached past Philza to grab your coat. After you slipped it on, you were pulled into a hug. “You’re gonna do great out there. I know you’re gonna win this, we’ll be watching in the stands.”

“Damn right she’s gonna do good, she’s my niece after all.”

Schlatt pulled you away from your father’s hug and tried to ruffle your hair before you swatted away his hand, “don’t. You have no idea how long it took me to get a perfect ponytail. I have an ungodly amount of hairspray and bobby pins in my hair right now.”

“Fine. You’re gonna kick their asses tonight.”

Tommy and Tubbo pushed past Schlatt and both tackled you into a hug making you stumble slightly back. 

“Kick their asses good (y/n)!” Tommy cheered, making you crack up before one stern glance from Philza completely stopped you. “Tommy, don’t say that. (Y/n), not funny.”

“Alright, Haley’s waiting for me. I gotta go, love you guys!” As you turned to walk through the door, you could hear your family following you and shouting “good luck”. You felt heat creep up on your cheeks as Haley rolled down her window and wove at your family with the biggest grin on her face. 

“Thank you! We’re gonna take home the gold for sure!”

You hopped in her car as she rolled up the window and chuckled. “I love your family, they’re always so full of energy. It’s refreshing to see compared to how boring my family is.”

You glanced at your entire family gathered on the front porch. Tommy and Tubbo were practically vibrating with excitement, Wilbur and Techno calmly smiled and wove at you, Philza was grinning widely at you as you saw his mouth forming words that you couldn’t hear or read, and Schlatt was grinning cheekily at you. You raised your hand to wave at them as they vanished from view when Haley pulled out of your driveway. You smiled softly, “I love em too.”

The car ride was relatively quick with the same soft indie pop music floating from the speakers and an easy going conversation with Haley about the match tonight. You both thought that you could beat the other team if everyone focused 100% and played exactly like you guys did in practices. If everyone did that, you would be unstoppable. 

Luckily for you and Haley, you were the first ones in line to board the bus so you two got the back seat with Zara and Jazzy sitting across from you guys. The hour long bus ride passed quickly and lively with you four passing around your phone and playing some mad libs, you were sure that by the end of the last game you four were laughing and crying. Sometime in the middle of the trip, you noticed that Haley would start to lean on your shoulder and continuously glance at you as she laughed. You desperately wanted to believe that it was because she liked you, but she was straight and she was your best friend. She was probably trying to make sure you were having a good time. 

When the team had gotten to the opposing school and left the locker room to stretch in the gym, you could hear your family start to scream your and Haley’s names from the front row next to you, Tommy and Tubbo being the loudest amongst them with Philza trying to get them to quiet down so you could focus. You felt your cheeks heat up as you smiled at them and Haley wove enthusiastically back at them. Zara was laughing at you two. Stretching went by in a flash and before you knew it, you were on the court facing the opposing team. 

The first match was won by the opposing team by five points. The second match stretched on and on until it was won by your team narrowly by two points. The team was going to have to shape up in the third match if you guys wanted a chance at winning, the opposing team was good. Before the third match started, Coach Williams called for a time out so you guys could talk about strategy. Before Haley could go back onto the court, you pulled her aside.

“Hales, we need to do what we practiced. The other team won’t be expecting it at all, I’ve been setting you up this entire game. They’re never going to expect you setting me up for a spike.”

“When are we going to do it though? We need a better plan.”

“I’m sure the opportunity will come and both of us will recognize it. We just can’t do it too early in the game though, that’ll ruin their surprise.”

“(Y/n), I hope you know what you’re doing.”

“When do I not Hales? We gotta get gold this year.”

The third round went by with both teams constantly swapping places until you both were tied fifteen to fifteen. You saw the ball flying towards Haley, giving her the perfect opportunity to set you up for a spike.  “HALEY NOW!” 

You watched as her face hardened in determination as she pretended like she was going to spike it by jumping high in the air and stretching her arms back, making the opposing front row players all gather in front of her. Much to their surprise, she launched it towards you as you leaped up and went for the kill. The stinging of the ball hit by your wrist and the smack sound the ball made when it slammed onto the open gym floor was something you’d never forget as the crowd around you went wild over the unexpected play. You could hear the high pitched screaming of Tommy and Tubbo over everybody else. Glancing at them over your shoulder, you saw them jumping up and down on the gym floor and looking at you with awe filled eyes and gaping mouths. The rest of your family looked at you with similar expressions, their cheers echoing in your mind. Winking at them, you turned back to your team and went straight to Haley. Clapping a hand on her shoulder, you pulled her into a quick hug, yelling over the raving of the crowd. “HALEY WE NAILED THAT!” 

“HOLY SHIT I DID NOT THINK THAT WAS ACTUALLY GONNA WORK!”

“You have such little faith in your setter! You wound me Hales.”

“Well, I would have more faith in you if you weren’t chaotic on the court, sweetheart.”

You felt yourself surge in happiness at the nickname, but you couldn’t afford to focus too much on it. Your team only needed one more point to win best in the state and go to nationals. It would be the first time in your team’s history if you reached national level, and you’d be damned if you were the one to screw it up for them. 

The last rotation went on for a while, each team fighting tooth and nail for the state championship title with clashing determination. You tried your best to block every hit and try to set Haley up for a spike, and you were successful for the most part, only missing a few blocks. You saw the setter adjacent to you set the spiker up for a spike and jumped up in time to try to block it, your arms stretched upwards and your palms out. Only, the ball didn’t hit your hands. It collided painfully with your nose, ricocheted off your face with a thwack and sailed over to the other side of the court. Your head whipped back as your body followed suit and flew backwards onto the floor. Without giving you any time to react, your head bounced back and cracked against the polished hardwood floor of the gym. Everything went black. 

“...(y……”

“..(y/n)......”

“(Y/n).”

You faintly heard someone calling someone’s name over the continuous ringing noise. Was it your name? It felt right, so it had to be your name. You peeled your eyes open to see a blurry figure hovering over you. It was swirled with tans, browns, and backs. After a while of the figure repeating your name, it slowly became more recognizable, albeit appearing twice in your vision. It took you a while to figure out who this was before your muddled brain recognized Haley.

“Hales! There’s two o’ya. Twice as beautiful babe…” You slurred out as you attempted to smile at her.

“Oh thank god, PLEASE WE NEED A DOCTOR SHE HIT HER HEAD!” Her usually angelic voice gritted against your brain like sandpaper making you cringe as pain exploded in your head.

“God babe you’re so loud, why’s so bright? I-wha's goin on?” You blearily tried to move your head to look around only to be stopped by a pair of large hands on each side of your head gently holding it in place. You moved your laggy eyes around to look at the figure. He was a blonde man with blue eyes and a hint of stubble on his chin. His eyebrows were knitted together and he looked… he looked… your brain worked to figure out why he looked how he looked. Who was he?

“Please don’t move hun.” His muffled voice was baritone. You squinted at him trying to figure out who this man was.

“Who th f-fuck… why?”

“I’m your dad hun. Do-do you not recognize me?” You made a noise in the back of your throat as your stuffy brain finally put a name to the face.

“Dad- wha’s goin on? I’on feel so good…”

“Shh, I know, I know. Just stop moving and talking. Everything’s fine. I’m here. You’re okay.”

“Mmk… Dad, where are we? I’ont know- you’re so quiet.”

“Stop moving so much. You’re on the floor in a gym. You just won your team the state championship. Now stop talking please.”

Huh. So that’s why everybody seemed to appear from above you. You strained your eyes to look around you, but you could only see your dad’s face hovering above you. “Shit I- who’s aroun’ me? Where’s Hales?”

“I’m right here sweetheart. I got the doctor, Mr. Minecraft.”

Your dad’s face moved away from your vision so fast that it made your head spin and your stomach twist. Another face appeared above you that you once again didn’t recognize.

“I’m Doctor Martin, can you tell me your first and last name?”

“Uh, (y/n) Minecraft?”

“Good, what month are we in right now?”

“Nov-November?”

“Close, it’s late October. Can you tell me who this,” he pointed to your dad, “is?”

“S’my dad Phillip.”

“That’s your dad Philza.”

The questioning stopped as he suddenly shined a blinding light into your sensitive eyes. You hissed as you tried to move your head away from the offending light only to be held in place by your dad’s hands. Your head spun as you moved too quickly and a wave of nausea hit you, making you groan and move your arm to cover your eyes. Your hand was stopped by something warm and soft wrapping around it and holding it tightly. Everything was so overwhelmingly and painfully bright and loud. You wanted to make it stop. 

“Mr. Minecraft, your daughter appears to have a concussion. I don’t have the tools on hand to determine the severity of it, but it’s worrying that her pupils are asymmetrical, she’s delirious, and has slight memory loss. I understand you live about an hour away from here, and it’s alright for you to take her to a hospital closer to your house. Make sure you keep her alert.”

Your delirious mind only registered about half of what came out of the doctor’s mouth. You mumbled gibberish as you once again opened your eyes to look around. You were only briefly able to crane your neck to the left. Several figures large and small were standing behind your dad. Your family, your mind supplemented. Slowly, your mind was starting to recognize your surroundings even if there was currently double of everything and everything was blurry.

“I’m going to help you stand up. Do ya think you can do that?”

“Yeah Dad.” You lifted your upper body off from the ground with a gentle hand on your back helping you sit up. Fighting the wave of nausea that slapped you in the face, you reached up to rub at your eyes. A hand once again stopped you. You peeked your eyelids open and lightly glared at whomever stopped you. “Hales you’re lucky you’re so cute I woulda slapped you. I like holdin but you’re bein annoying. Stop.” You attempted to make your voice sound firm, but the words that came out of your mouth were slightly slurred.

She was silent as she helped her dad haul you to your feet. Once on your feet, you saw the room spin and felt yourself start to sway slightly. An arm wrapped itself around your shoulders and pulled you close to them so that your weight was supported. They were a little taller than you were making it easy to lean on them. 

“...Can you walk?” A deep, monotone voice rumbled the chest of the person you were leaning against. 

“Mhm. ‘M not weak.” Though your limbs felt like they were made of molasses, you placed one foot in front of the other slowly. The person moved alongside you, “you’re doing so good, keep going.” That sparked familiarity in you as you stopped in your tracks and tried to look up at the person you were leaning against making the person tighten their arm around your shoulders when you almost fell over.

“Tech?”

“Yeah, it’s Technoblade. Just focus on walking. You’re almost out of the gym.”

When you realized that you were out of the gym, you sighed in relief. It was so much quieter and darker. Though it was still relatively bright, it was better than the gym. 

“S’better.”

“When we get her to the car we can give her some sunglasses or something if it’s still too bright for her.”

“Wilbs-”

“Focus on walking.”

You huffed in irritation, “don’ tell me what to do bitch.”

You felt Techno’s body jolt slightly as he chuckled, making your head throb at the sudden movement. “Just walk.”

When you walked outside, you shivered as you felt the cool air nip at your exposed skin. Right, you were in your volleyball uniform. “I’ll go pull the car around, you guys stay with her.” 

You saw a tall brunet start to walk away from you. Uncle Splat? Uncle Schmat? Whatever his name was, you were sure he was your uncle. You tried to snuggle closer to Techno, craving warmth but never being satisfied. Where was your uncle? 

After a while, you saw a car moving towards you and blinding light pointed right at you making you cringe away and groan. Techno started to slowly walk towards the car. “C’mon (y/n), you’re almost there. When you’re in the car you can relax.”

“Tommy, Tubbo, and Techno, you’re in the back row. Schlatt can drive and Wil, you’re taking the passenger seat. I’ll stay with her in the middle row so she can have some room to lay down.” Tommy and Tubbo were with you? Why weren’t they talking, they usually were very vocal.

“Tom, Tubbs didja like the game?”

They didn’t say anything as they climbed into the car. Did they not hear you? 

“They’re just… tired (y/n).” Your dad’s voice reassured you as he took Techno’s place holding you up. 

“I wanna nap. ‘M so tired.”

“You can’t sleep yet. We gotta get you to a doctor first.”

“Mm. Makes sense.”

“Let’s get you in the car hun.”

As he helped you climb into the car, you felt an overwhelming wave of nausea wash over you making you lose your balance and almost faceplant into the cloth seats. You felt yourself being gently, yet urgently taken out of the car and led to grass as you felt your esophagus shorten. Something burning made its way up your throat and spewed into the grass. You felt someone rubbing your back as you puked up your dinner. 

When you were done, you reached up with a shaking hand to wipe your mouth. “You feelin better? Think you can get back into the car or do you need to sit down for a bit?”

“Car.”

After some difficulty, you were successfully in the middle row of the car laying down with your head on Philza’s lap. Soon enough, your shoes were taken off and a blanket was draped over you. 

“(Y/n), what do you remember?”

You scrunched up your face as you squinted at Philza’s face. “I remember playing volleyball with Hales. She’s so pretty, she’s straight though. I remember the other team hitting the ball, me jumping, then nothin. Wha’ happened?”

You watched as Philza winced, “well, you got everything right so far. You got hit in the face with the ball so you fell and hit your head on the floor. You were passed out for a minute before you woke up. It was a pretty nasty fall, we’re going to the hospital now. How’re ya feelin?”

“Head hurts, ‘m seein two of everything, an I can’t think.”

“Do you know what a concussion is?” You nodded in his lap slightly, “you probably have one.”

After a while of talking, you were slowly starting to come to your senses and your speech was clearing up, but your head was still too stuffy to think about what you were saying before you said it. You didn’t have a filter.

“Do you wanna tell us about your week so far? Do you remember most of it?”

“Mhm, it was shit. On Monday I had a panic attack and Adrian, Sammy, and Annie were being bitches to me all day. They fucked up my back. On Tuesday, they got mad at me for ditching them and they had me do their homework, had another panic attack, and Haley told me that someone took pictures of our boobs ‘n stuff and they were gonna leak it to the school if Haley didn’t stop hanging out with me. Haley and I almost kissed, but she’s straight. Pulled an all nighter and Wednesday I accidentally came out to Tech and Wil and had another panic attack. Annie, Adrian, and Sammy took more pictures of me through my window, Annie outed me to the entire school and slapped me. Another panic attack, skipped the last two classes and felt like shit the entire practice. Today Adrian and Sammy told me to kill myself and I had another panic attack. ’S about it.”

As you were going through your week, the hand that was previously gently stroking your hair had frozen as the car was enveloped in a tense silence. Luckily, Tommy and Tubbo were passed out in the back seat so they didn’t hear how bad your week was. Everyone awake knew that you had a few bad days this week, but they didn’t know the full extent of it. You watched as Philza’s expression had turned downright murderous, but you didn’t really care. You were busy talking about your week.

For the rest of the car ride, Philza asked you simple questions like what your favorite color was, your favorite animal, basically your favorite everything. Eventually, the car pulled into the hospital parking lot and Philza helped you get out of the car. “Schlatt, can you take the boys home so they can get some rest? I’ll stay with her.” 

“Yeah, I’m on it. Don’t cause too much trouble (y/n), we all know you can raise hell.” He watched you for a reaction, but when you didn’t react, he coughed. “Well, I’ll see ya later kid. Good luck.”

The car drove off leaving you and Philza at the front of the emergency room building. “It’s gonna be a long night (y/n).”

“I gotta finish Annie’s essay and Sammy’s presentation though.”

“No you don’t, I’ll email your teachers.”

You two checked in with the front desk before moving to sit on the uncomfortable chairs. It was going to be a long night. You were so tired.

General taglist (comment if you want to be added):

@jabby16

Series taglist (comment if you want to be added):

@immadatmostthings  @thaticecreambish  @hee-hee-haw  @dearnataliealoveletter  @wasteofspacze  @dcml04  @bbigbbrainn  @dirtydiavolo  @vanhakirja  @rinzyx05  @misselsbells06  @ialexabsuniverse  @im-a-depressed-gay  @energy-drinkk  @mothra-main  @i-need-hugs  @dragons-lurk-here  @katj733  @m4r-s  @vievi  @dykeragee  @waterstrawberry  @aplaintart  @kakamiissad  @myunfinishedsymphony  @nagitokinnieissad  @autumnpleaves  @justanothergirlwithdemons  @zachariethememerie  @moon-asia  @m0on-blue  @strawberrysodababy  @akikko-yataro  @haikkeiji  @shiningsunrises  @cinnamonmochi  @queen-turtle-boiii  @imanewsoul  @sparkling-gayyyy  @angelicaschuyler-church  @vixenfoxpup  @ella-ivanov  @shio-yuki  @mosstea-png @ijustshatbricks  @sugarandspicebutnonice  @coolayee  @haikkeiji  @sadassflatass

@a-simp-for-block-people  @goldenstarofthunderclan  @laura--444  @sylumarts  @faceache111  @auroraskyfall  @kusuinko  @http-issaclahey  @angelic-scent  @multifandomgirl94  @mirios-sunflower  @lifestylesleep  @altwitchtrash  @queenbouncingjelly  @eieminia  @livie-bug82108  @cheybaee  @demure--daisy  @midnight-storm  @moonbaejpeg  @kiinokochii  @miavfx  @vilbur-s00t  @coreybyrg  @comfytastic  @kodababygirl-blog  @artisticfandomtrash  @yourlmanburg  @indigopocky  @futuitsursum  @luluwinchester  @hello-there556  @kike-jii  @kalipto

[lovetals]

so, like, idk jack about the lore to kingdom hearts, but the idea of an mc who’s from the game tingles my brain a lot so i gotta dump this out

i’m gonna keep this vague enough so that ppl can interpret the mc however they please (whether we be besties with the beach trio or some other group)

but this idea would fit perfectly since the two are a collab of sorts with disney, only difference is how they use it. kingdom hearts is about traveling to other worlds, which are the disney movies. with twisted wonderland, everything takes place in one world

so imagine a keyblade wielder mc that somehow winds up in twisted wonderland while going from world to world. something happens and they aren’t able to go back, maybe they lost a bit of their powers or the gummi ship they were on is somewhere between the worlds. whatever the case, they’re stuck and now have to reside in the nrc because it’s just their luck that they land there

idk how much they can reveal because of that whole world order thing and they probs don’t trust anyone with outside information cause it’s a school of villains lmao

OH MY GOD AND THE MC WOULD KNOW THE TRUE NATURE OF THOSE GREAT SEVEN BECAUSE THEYVE WITNESSED THEM IRL LMFAO

they keep their mouth shut, tho, cause maybe it’s different for them. also, they do not want to be chased out for talking shit on them 🧍‍♀️

mc would feel so conflicted about the world and everyone there tho cause, like stated earlier, they got to witness the great seven’s actions in other worlds and with how the dorm leaders are inspired by said seven they’re just so cautious. but after riddle’s overblot they realize “oh shit they have actual issues” and everyone is actually kinda cool with enough time

the mc in this can still use their keyblade and some magic (if we’re going with the power loss route then i’m afraid your firagra has been reduced to just fire TwT) so they can chip in with the battles and show off how cool they are hehehe

OH OH AND EACH BATTLE THEY GET TO UPGRADE THEIR MAGIC AND SHIT!

mc getting thunder before azul fight: i’m going to shock the heart!

jade: ????

ooh it’d be so cool if every time the mc defeats an overblot they receive a new keyblade based on the dorm, just like how when we beat a world in kh we get a new keyblade based on it

oh god there’s gonna be so many questions from their peers when they see the keyblade. ace is gonna mock the shit out of you for it cause it’s just an oversized key (he shuts up real quick when you bonk him with it tho). it’s just such a unique weapon and the fact that you can summon it from nowhere?? slay

kalim would want to hold the weapon so badly and gets sad when it instantly materializes back into your hand lmao

idk much about lilia, but i think he’d know something about the keyblade and your origins when he sees it. he’s old, he probably knows something. might have had tea with young xehanort before he got old

vil asks to see your whole collection so he can rank them from most to least beautiful

ya know those wayfinders that aqua/kairi made for her friends as a way to show how even if they’re apart they’ll never lose each other or whatever? it’d be so cute if the mc did something like that for their friends :> (currently sobbing at the idea of drawing their faces on it like kairi did for sora 😭)

oh, poor mc would get bullied by ace for saying the corniest shit (“my friends are my power! 😜🤪”) but over time he grows to love these words so much, starts to tear up frfr

your constant reminders of the importance of friendships and how the bonds you all formed are unbreakable really does start to grow on everyone. (cater stan here: he also starts believing in this too cuz i said so <3) (CATER USES THE WAYFINDER YOU MADE AS A PJONE CHARM DUDE)

OH AND DONT THINK I FORGOT ABOUT SILVER

man looks so much like riku, there just has to be some interaction with him and the mc about it

mc, seeing a sleeping silver: god fucking damn it not again. plz don’t have yellow eyes, plz don’t have yellow eyes—

aaaaaaaa ok it’s past 12 a.m for me, my brain is a mess and my eyes want to get some shut eye so i’m gonna end this here. also, can’t think of more stuff to add :((

if anyone has more things they’d like to chip in, PLEASE do! i want more hcs and shit to add onto this idea of mine