#and lots of reassurance and completed character arc for Jonathan if they give it to him

[share-the-damn-bed]

isn;t it hypocritical when jancy fans hate on steve for wanting kids with nancy only to head canon jonathan and nancy having kids?

Thanks for the ask, Anon! First things first, I would like it to be known that I personally headcanon Jancy as not having kids…

But regardless, I don’t think the belief that Steve’s dream (as he presented it to Nancy) doesn’t align with her future plans and the desire for Jancy to have kids is hypocritical at all.

I think (at least in my case) the critique of St*ncy in this regard isn’t simply about Steve wanting to have kids and Nancy not wanting kids at all. It’s about the value placed on having children (and the quantity) at this stage in life. This is Steve’s dream and it is clearly is very important to him even though he mentions Nancy’s being his wife is the most important aspect of that dream.

Steve clearly values family and wants to have a big family, that is his aspiration.

From what we’ve seen from Nancy, she has emphasized that her career is her major ambition in life. Sure she mentioned that Steve’s dream of traveling the country via RV sounds nice she explicitly states the kids sound like a nightmare and her reaction in the upside down on screen reiterates that. Additionally, we know from season 1 she rejects the idea of living the suburban life style and wants more than what her mom was able to accomplish (this has been a nice little plot thread throughout the series between Nancy and Karen).

Nancy hasn’t expressed an interest in having a family once throughout the show. She’s not in a place in her life where that is her priority. Not in the way it is for Steve.

When Jancy fans see them with children (generally, I cannot speak for all Jancy fans, obviously), they tend to be in a whole other phase of life once they’ve accomplished a few of their career goals and have lived their lives a bit.

Steve and Nancy’s life plans are currently conflicting. And current conflict is important because it can breed resentment in the way Jonathan is panicking about currently in canon (it’s what he fears the most from their relationship, that and ending up just like his father). I would even be bold enough to say that the fact that Steve presented this dream to Nancy as if she may be interested in it demonstrates that Steve doesn’t really know Nancy well at all. But that’s a whole other discussion.

[willel]

The problem I see is that most ppl who are currently asking for interactions/conversations between Joyce and Jonathan tend actually to have a narrow and somewhat distorted perception of their relationship, and that’s mainly constructed from Jonathan’s alleged perspective, btw. I think that’s the point other people are now reacting to.

But do you not see why people might be framing this from Jonathan's perspective right now in the grand scheme of things?

In season 1, Joyce's character was fixated on her boys , Hopper, the government, and supernatural plot.

Season 2, Joyce was fixated on Will, Bob, a bit of Hopper, the government, and the supernatural plot.

Season 3, Joyce was fixated on Hopper, the Soviets, and a dash of the supernatural plot at the end.

In season 4, Joyce was fixated on Hopper and the Soviet plot.

As a fan of the Byers family overall, you gotta think, "In what way can you bring back the family dynamic in an interesting way that won't lead to complete disaster, but can be tense with a little drama but the outcome would be overwhelming good?"

So then you look at her boys which she's been separated from for 2 seasons.

For Will, it's pretty easy. He has his sexuality arc going on right now. Although Will didn't outright say it, Jonathan made it super duper clear he already knows and accepts him.

We know Joyce is gonna accept him too and I'm sure HE knows that as well, but it still takes a lot of courage to come out and say it to someone. Even if he doesn't, would be nice for his mom to give him a similar or maybe even more obvious pep talk about how she loves him no matter what. Could apply to both his sexuality and maybe whatever supernatural stuff he's going to go through.

Joyce and Will are easy and done with.

Now you look at Jonathan. What is Jonathan dealing with? He's literally destroying his life because he feels personally responsible for taking care of his family. He lied to his family and girlfriend about school and is letting everything crumble around him.

So then, as someone who loves the Byers family, how might some Byers family moments fix this?

I think the obvious answer would be Joyce finding out he lied about the school situation since she's been anxiously waiting for his college acceptance letter while he's at high school. I think it's obvious upon finding that out, she would confront her son. I think it's obvious when poked even a little bit, all of Jonathan's troubles would come spilling out whether he wants them to or not.

I can't say how fast that subplot would be resolved after it all gets out in the open, but without a doubt I think the result would be exactly as they were in season 1. Even when they were bickering or Joyce was scolding him it always resulted in hugs and understanding (ESPECIALLY that time when she was frustrated with his 'I can do it myself' attitude, the EXACT same issue he's having right now)

Like, is this not from Joyce's perspective?? Jonathan is her son. She doesn't like it when he acts like a lone wolf and takes on too many responsibilities whether it's killing a monster or working when he shouldn't.

This is the character arc Jonathan is going through. She's had to put up with this behavior before in season 1 and we already saw exactly how she'd resolve that. A confrontation. A stern talking to. A pep talk. Reassurance. A hug. Some tears.

They keep saying "We're going to circle back to season 1" and yet people seems to have forgotten how Joyce and Jonathan were in season 1...... things weren't sunshine and rainbows but they made it work. They were adorable and loving.

Like of course, people will talk about what Jonathan must be feeling right now. But it's because these are all things people hope Joyce would notice, just like she has in previous seasons, and save her son from his misery.

I'd like to finish off by saying, again, THIS DOES NOT MAKE JOYCE A BAD MOTHER and I still don't know how people can jump to that conclusion after reading all this. She's without a doubt the best mom on the entire show and the only competition is Terry Ives. Like.... Joyce is grade A material, no wonder every man in the solar system has tried to get with her.

[emblazons]

hi marie, its me again <3 the anon with byler doubt haha ... you made such great points! and tysm for such a thorough response.

I am SO CURIOUS how do you think they'll get Mike and Will together? I think that's the aspect that has me doubting the most because it feels so so MESSY and they can very easily mess it all up if they aren't careful.

Explaining Mike's internalized homophobia etc might be something too difficult to unpack in just one season, on top of everything else going on as well with the world literally ending. I also don't know what the point was of having Mike say he loved Eleven if it wasn't true, what do you think they were trying to achieve with that?

Do we truly think she'd be okay with breaking up with Mike? And if the answer is yes, how will that affect Mike and El's dynamic going forward, you think? Will they really not only break up milkvan, but leave elmike underdeveloped in favor of Byler?

I look at the Steve/Nancy/Jonathan love triangle and that has been a mess for seasons now and still no resolution, so I don't know how they'll do it for Mike and Will. I fear they'll go for the "easy route" (aka milkvan endgame) to focus on the supernatural and other characters more. Because if Byler is endgame I feel like they'd need to devote a great chunk of the season to them in order to explain wth is going on with Mike specifically + giving him closure with El.

I suppose something else that gives me doubt is how Mike and Will have been sidelined in these last few seasons to give more screentime/protagonism to other characters and dynamics, so I don't know if I can fully believe the Duffers care THAT much about romantic!Byler if that makes sense.

Hopefully this all doesn't sound overly pessimistic or something, I am genuinely curious about your thoughts in some of these more like looking for reassurance tbh! Especially after reading your response to my first ask <3 TYSM once again!!

hello again!

To be honest, you've got a lot of questions that require separate (and equally detailed) responses, but...let me see if I can briefly explain each, and maybe link to other analyses I've done that might help make sense of why I say.

note: some of these are just my frankest opinions unfiltered, but I do have analytical reasons for all of them. Your questions are also asking things it's taken several rewatches and a year to sort through so...apologies if you just get the simplest version of the idea delineated here haha. also, a cut, because this got really long.

1: How do you think they'll get Mike and Will together? Transparently? I'm not really all that into specifics, because expecting specific things means I'm going to fall into the trap of thinking I'm the one writing it when I'm not and then say The Duffers "lied" or "messed up" because I expected something they never put in there. That said—in terms of plain setup, they will need to address the painting because that was a critical plot point from damn near minute one of S4, and now it's become fully integrated with not only Will's feelings for Mike, but Mike's own sense of El's feelings for him.

Beyond that...I think El will need to be the one to initiate the "complete" breakup, because she's the one who wanted space in the first place, the one who is repeatedly having her romantic partner paralleled to parental and tragic figures, the one refuses to be vulnerable & who built lies into their relationship...and the one whose general arc centers around reclaiming autonomy and choice from the men in her life. I also think Mike will be the one to initiate the romantic aspect, if its not a bit mutual.

2: Mike's internalized homophobia etc might be something too difficult to unpack in just one season - I disagree. We managed to sort through introducing Will's romantic feelings and sense of his queerness in a single season just fine...and Mike has had queer-coding show up throughout every season if you know what you're looking for.

The fact that this boy already has a one way sign into his closet, has repeatedly yelled about "boys only" every season AND shows clear signs of male attraction already has most people (even the supposed 'GA') suspicious of his sexuality, and combined with his devotion to will + the wider context, there are plenty of ways to introduce the idea of him liking boys explicitly that don't require any intense delineation...unless you expect them to say "he's gay" out loud, which they didn't do when Robin came out, and still haven't done for Will either...despite everyone knowing damn well they're gay.

3: I also don't know what the point was of having Mike say he loved Eleven if it wasn't true - I think that most of the breakdowns I've done of parentified!mike make clear that the love he has for her is somewhat genuine...though its being written as misplaced familial love, because he spent so much time believing he needed "a girl" to assuage his insecurities.

While I absolutely lean toward a gay!Mike reading myself, it's still clear even without a label that Mike's love mirrors Hopper's more than it resembles any of the love given by potential romantic partners to other women across the show—and Mike, given that he was being told by Will that El needed him to say he loved her for her to win, did what he thought was necessary to help her.

I do not think his love for her is a lie—I simply think it isn't romantic, and has now been so conflated with something negative in El's mind that it wouldn't matter if he mean't it romantically anyway. That said: narratively, Mike had to say he loved El because unless the fullness of what was expected (an I love you) was accomplished, it would hang over the story and any relationship Byler might have. El needed to hear it...so she could reject it, which she did.

4: Do we truly think she'd be okay with breaking up with Mike? yes. I think El will be absolutely 300000% just fine being broken up with Mike lmao. She has Hopper back now (who she was mourning the loss of, and therefore looking to fill with Mike emotionally), on top of having Max's "there's more to life than stupid boys" at the fore of her mind saving her.

Mike is also paralleled to parental and abusive figures in El's mind, on top of the fact that she has been keeping him at an emotional distance for the entirety of S4. Given that she and Lucas will probably also get closer in the search for Max...I'm quite sure she's not going to take it as hard as people imagine, especially given the fact that we already know she was happiest in S3 when they were broken up.

I also don't have any expectation of ElMike being super close friends (beyond party bonds + civility) either, which...I mean if you are I apologize but. I don't see that happening in canon, so them being developed deeply as friends before the show ends is not important to me as a plot point, and doesn't really have any canonical backing considering their ongoing lack of platonic connection outside of the necessary + lack of common interest. That's even a note thematically in the show...which means its makes sense for them not to be that close by the end of the narrative.

5: Steve/Nancy/Jonathan love triangle and that has been a mess for seasons now and still no resolution, so I don't know how they'll do it for Mike and Will. Truth be told, that love triangle has a resolution—Nancy has chosen Jonathan, and continues to, even though she flirted with Steve when she felt lonely. Nancy's arc has always centered around choosing something different than her parents and has from S1—her brief flirtation with Steve aside, her loyalty to Jonathan hasn't changed, though they are absolutely not a perfect couple.

If anything, the end of S4 set up Jonathan and Steve learning to be friends less so than anything implying Nancy might choose Steve instead—Jonathan is finally in a narrative position to choose something for himself now which frees him up to be honest with Nancy, and even outside of that, Nancy is far more likely to end up with single than she is with Steve—which is the exact opposite of how they've set up Mike to be with Will rather than El over the course of the season.

6: I fear they'll go for the "easy route" (aka milkvan endgame) to focus on the supernatural and other characters more. I don't agree. The supernatual plot has always been well-integrated with the romantic elements in every couple across the board, from Mike's "first love lost" energy happening when El disappeared in S1, Lumax bonding in S2 in a fight with demodogs, Jancy's bonding across S2-3 happening in the lab seeing the gate, while Will was un-possessed, and while they fought the thing monster in the hospital....and Jopper in Russia fighting a demogorgon in S4.

The Duffers have never slacked in setting up their romances in conjunction with the supernatual plots, and there's no reason to think they're gonna start with Byler, especially given Will's mirroring of Vecna/Henry, the way the day his disappeared is the day the UD is frozen, and how he's the one who can sense him...while now having Mike glued to his side.

7: if Byler is endgame I feel like they'd need to devote a great chunk of the season to them in order to explain wth is going on with Mike specifically + giving him closure with El. The 5th season is going to bring all of the characters together again, and they've already said Will is central to that. I've written before about the reason why they had to sideline Will in their plot to make a narrative point, but regardless...like I said before, if you know how to read subtext, Mike being queer won't come as all that much of a surprise.

Note: I've done several (1, 2, 3, 4, 5) analyses on Mike and his arc, which might help.

Beyond that...again, I honestly don't think The Duffers care much to make ElMike besties like fanon seems to think they should be (they haven't done it with any of the other romantic couples they've broken up) so...closure can include civility and acceptance for them the way it did S2 Steve with Jancy, imo. What Mike needs most is to gain the courage to accept himself and realize he doesn't need a girl to assuage his insecurities—and him being casual friends with El the same way he is casually supportive canonically with Max makes more sense than trying to skirt over all the mess of their relationship for the sake of an attached fandom ☠️

—that was a lot to cover, but hopefully that cleared up my position on a lot of your questions? I would also encourage you to take a look at my ST commentary tag & analyses highlights list (soon to be updated again) and even my asks for more context, on top of maybe giving the show a rewatch in its entirety if you can.

Sidebar: I also encourage you to dig into my Duffer Brothers tag and commentary (see bottom of the page), because knowing who made the show is just as helpful as understanding the show itself.

Its really easy to get caught in other people's wants and headcanons for the show if you don't keep going back to it yourself, so—as lovingly as possible, I really do encourage you to just sit and watch it with the "byler knowledge" you have from users like me, your other fave analysts, and maybe some of the "old guard" like @kaypeace21, who was integral in my own development of opinions before I dug in for myself. If you're ever doubting, that's always your best bet.

That said: It's literally impossible to summarize a framework crossing nearly 37 hours of TV in a single ask (or even 20)...which is why I've got almost a year worth of posts about it (and have evolved my depth of understanding dramatically over time).

The same way you can't spark notes your way through a degree without missing a lot of context, even me saying this with evidence won't help a lot if you haven't dug into it yourself—and doubt will repeatedly creep in if you're trusting me over the show itself, even though the show is where I've pulled all this from lmao.

—this got really long, but....I hope it helped. And again, sorry if I seemed short anywhere lmao. This was a lot to cover. Still, as always, thanks for the ask!

[pastelwitchling]

He already threw a "Manes' man" dagger at him. I just dont feel we'll get a satisfying arc with Alex :/ but we'll see

See, that’s the thing, with this fandom, it feels like everything is turned to black and white. He said this horrible thing, therefore there’s no fixing it. They did this horrible thing, so there’s no moving on from that. By all means, feel however you want about the show, about the characters, about malex, but...

The best way to describe how I’m feeling is by restating something Luke Baines (Jonathan Morgenstern from Shadowhunters) once said in an interview that’s really resonated with me. He said the biggest problem we as a generation face is that we’re so quick to throw people away nowadays because they hurt us, while some of his best friends are only his best friends because of all the ups and downs they’ve had. That translates well to this, I think, in that people look at this thing Michael said, therefore he’s nothing but toxic and their relationship is doomed. Alex blames himself, therefore Michael is terrible for him and the relationship is doomed. Nothing is in black and white, nothing. That’s just how I personally see it. To condemn the relationship because he said something, because the road for them hasn’t been easy, because he’s kept walking away -- I just don’t see it that way. I can’t say I understand where these fears really come from because I, like Luke Baines, agree that the biggest problem we have nowadays is that we are so quick to cancel things out. I get not wanting to deal with things that hurt us, that cause us pain, but at the same time, you need that pain because otherwise, every little thing seems to cause a lot more damage than it actually does.

I will confess here, for the first time I think, that I have severe anxiety, and I disassociate a lot. Anyone who also goes through this knows how stressful and frightening and hard it is just to make a meal in the day. And, I know a lot of people will disagree with me on this, but I prefer the tough love method. I ask my friend to reassure me with these exact words, and I’m not kidding; “Rin, you’re being stupid, this is stupid, everything is going to be fine.” It makes me feel better to recognize what what I’m feeling is irrational and is ridiculous, it gives me cause to scoff at it myself. I’ve never coddled anyone on my blog, I don’t think I have, I’ve never sugar-coated anything. For that reason, and because I genuinely care, I’m not going to tell you you’re being too sensitive if you cancel out malex for the things that have happened in this episode. I will, however, tell you this; the world is not in black and white, and when they do get together (because, again, I fully believe they’re endgame, I believe Carina wants them together), all this little stuff is going to seem so insignificant. There’s no such thing as a purely good person, and you can tell me you understand that, but if you don’t see that even the best of people are capable of having the cruelest of darkness in them, then you simply don’t understand it.

All I’m saying is, my love for you guys is a tough one. If you’re going to hate malex or be disappointed with it at every word or sentence, no matter how cruel, then you’re going to be disappointed a lot. I understand the majority of people don’t like tough love, I also understand that some people would rather not bother with malex if it’s going to keep upsetting them, and that’s completely valid (I don’t like that word because I think it gets tossed around a lot, but I’m using it here because it actually makes sense), but if you want genuine reassurance that Malex is going to be okay, that everything is going to be totally fine, then I give that to you. I give you my reassurance because people aren’t black and white, there’s no right way for those two to be together. I don’t want them talking to each other like they’re made of glass, I want them being them. Alex can handle Michael, it’s that simple -- Alex is the only one that’s ever been able to handle him. We’re going to face a lot of anger and frustration and tears along the way, absolutely, but if we didn’t, there’d be no story, no characters. So I’ll take this. I love this. It’ll all be okay.

[hiddlesgirl]

SH 320: City of Glass

By the Angel, there is so much to say about this episode. It was huge emotional rollercoaster; confrontations, goodbyes, tender moments, a huge battle and that special proposal. This was such an epic episode and (if that awful thing hadn’t happened on June 5th) it would have been the best season finale of the show; I would have been so devastated, excited and hyped for season four. The last scene wasn’t even the original episode ending which was even more of a cliff hanger; apparently we will figure out which scene it was because it’s pretty early on in 321.

Watching this episode is the most emotional I have even been watching an episode of Shadowhunters, in fact the only other time I can remember being this emotional watching an episode of a show was the Season 5 finale (and Series finale) of BBC Merlin. For 320; I was out of my seat, kneeling on the floor two feet away from my TV absolutely sobbing my heart out in those last 10 minutes. Amazing.

Now that Magnus is more composed you can see that he is still very suspicious of Asmodeus’ motives, he knows that his father is cunning and that he is playing nice for now but sooner or later his true intentions will be revealed. I really like the dynamic between them; Jack and Harry have a really great back and forth.

I also noticed that through the scene Magnus became physically closer to Asmodeus over the course of their conversation, he moved away initially but when he moves to leave he was shoulder to shoulder with him. I’m not sure if this was intentional or not but I think that it does subtlety show that Magnus still needs support and reassurance right now, that he is still vulnerable and is (perhaps subconsciously) seeking out comfort.

I absolutely adore Maryse, I think that her development and unlearning her past prejudices has made her one of the most changed characters and hers is one of the best overall character arcs in that respect; she is a very different person than she was. She has not only become more emotionally open but she has tried to make amends to numerous people for her past behaviour; Luke, Magnus, and her children.

She is worried that she may done or said something to jeopardise Alec and Magnus’ relationship; she has seen how much they love each other, how important their relationship is and how much it has changed her son for the better; and she doesn’t want to do anything to negatively affect that.

You can see her confusion and upset when Alec tells her he broke up with Magnus, she doesn’t understand why Alec would leave the person he was planning to propose to. Plus, she is worried about Alec because she can tell that he is not himself.

I really liked the interaction between Magnus, Lorenzo and Asmodeus; it was a little gratifying to see Lorenzo being fearful of Asmodeus. I laughed so hard when Asmodeus turned him into a chameleon; after everything Lorenzo has done to Magnus it is about time karma came back around for him. He did redeem himself a little by agreeing to take his magic back but there are so many things that  he has done that I don’t think he has time to atone for; the biggest probably being the fact that his entire grudge with Magnus is purely about jealousy.

You can see that Magnus enjoyed getting a little bit of payback, and you can’t blame him for that; he has been so out of control of his situation for so long, and a lot of that was down to Lorenzo (forbidding the other warlocks to help him in anyway, forcing Magnus to go to Edom in the first place and then making himself the only help available), that to take back some of that control is empowering. But you can also see that he is very conflicted, he is a kind and compassionate person at heart and he doesn’t enjoy hurting others so while it feels good to have some control he genuinely doesn’t enjoy this ‘revenge’.

We get to see just how manipulative, controlling and callous the Praetor is; they threaten to send Luke back to prison if he doesn’t do as he’s told. Luke is now indebted to them and he is going to struggle with that I think because he has a strong moral compass, I am very concerned about what plans the Praetor have for him and that vial of serum.

Although I want to cringe (and I did) when Jonathan moves to kiss Clary I also understand the reasoning behind it from his perspective. He was raised by Lilith who has a very skewed version of love and she also kissed him on the mouth. It seems that Jonathan has no concept of the boundaries between different types of love and how to demonstrate them.

I have really enjoyed dark Clary because it is interesting to see what kind of person she could have been, or could have become, if she was raised by Valentine; plus Kat does a great job. I thought the dynamic between her and Jonathan was very interesting too, she is very much the authority between them; he always ends up deferring to her. I wondering if this was because he didn’t want to upset her or cause her to leave, wanting to please her so that she wouldn’t abandon him.

I love the scene between Maryse and Magnus; my heart soared when Maryse said ‘stop, you know I love you’ because Magnus hasn’t had a mother in centuries (and he felt rejected by her) so to have the mother of the man he is in love with completely accept him into her heart and family must be amazing. Plus, again, it shows how far Maryse and her relationship with Magnus has come; in Season one and 2A she couldn’t even call him by his name, only calling him ‘downworlder’ or ‘warlock’; now, she has come to know him, accept him, appreciate him and love him. I’m not crying, you’re crying.

I got so excited when she told him about the engagement plan; she knew that he would need to be convinced of Alec’s love and had no qualms about telling him this. She knows that Alec would never tell him but Magnus deserves to know just how much Alec loves him; she is doing everything she can to bring them back together because she wants them both to be happy. I love Maryse with my whole ass heart.

Maia tells Jordan she doesn’t want the serum, she has come to terms with her new life and she doesn’t want to have to make another fresh start; she has a life here, with a pack and friends. She has worked hard to build this new life for herself and no matter the troubles she may have she doesn’t want to give that up. She knows that becoming a mundane again won’t help her; it would only isolate her because she would no longer have a pack or be part of this community she has found.

I don’t like Jordan but I think this was very well done and emotional scene; both Alisha and Chai did an amazing job. I think that it is the first time I felt some sympathy for Jordan, he was starting to turn his life around and make amends for his past mistakes, and now he won’t get the chance. I feel so much sympathy for Maia because she has been able to let go of the hurt and resentment, to get closure on that part of her past. Now she is losing this person all over again.

I love the confrontation scene between Magnus and Asmodeus, I keep saying it but I absolutely love the energy and dynamic between them. Asmosdeus’ true motives come out, he wants Magnus in Edom so they can gain control over it; he has had a taste of Magnus’ power and how strong it is, he wants to use it and Magnus to become King of Hell. It is Magnus’ worst nightmare confirmed, and Harry’s acting when he says those words is amazing; you could feel the power and emotion in the words.

I was surprised that Magnus decided to send Asmodeus to Limbo, but it is the only place he can think of from which Asmodeus can no longer reach him. I was so excited to see Magnus overpower and restrain Asmodeus, I love seeing Magnus being powerful and badass; plus to see him take control and sever himself from his father was awesome. Not only does it take physical strength but an emotional one too, because even after everything Asmodeus has done he is still Magnus’ father.

I also hope that Lorenzo having witnessed this, albeit as a chameleon, that he will have gained some respect for Magnus and will let go of his petty jealousy. This is the only way I see any redemption for him, if he lets go of his grudge.

I really liked the sword fight scene between Clary and Izzy; it was intense, the choreography was amazing and I love the flaming swords. My only criticism is that maybe the sound effects were slightly too loud so they could come off a little cheesy.

Simon tries to talk Clary down, telling her that she is going to have to live with her actions for the rest of her life; he knows that if she were herself she wouldn’t want to be hurting any of them and if she did the guilt would be with her for the rest of her life. He knows what it feels like to hurt someone you love and he doesn’t want her to experience that. You can see her falter and lose a little of her conviction when she’s faced with Simon, you can see that she loves him and doesn’t want to hurt him.

Jace is the one to sever the connection between Clary and Jonathan, literally leaping in (from what seems like an unlikely height, unless he can just jump six feet off the floor). We find out that not only was the rune fostering Clary’s darker side but it also was holding back some of Jonathan’s power; he sprouts wings and promptly wing slaps Alec which I cannot help but find funny. It makes sense that the rune would affect both of them and it is nice to finally see how it was affecting Jonathan.

I love Izzy, she is so selfless and willing to literally throw herself into the line of fire for people she cares about. I am wondering though if they just left all those shards of Glorious just lying around the Seelie realm, which seems like a bad idea, or did they take a few minutes to collect them all up? If they did, what would they do with them? Destroy them? Store them? Inform the Clave? Make more serum? A lot of unknowns surrounding that exploding sword.

As much as I love Luke I really don’t like him at the moment, I know that he is being coerced but he is using Maia’s trust in him as a tool to get the serum. I wonder if we will see the fall out of this. I also wonder what plans the Praetor has for the serum, do they plan to replicate it in order to distribute to willing Downworlders? Or for more selfish purposes? All I know is that we saw Luke with runes in the promo and I am both scared and excited.

I like that we are finally getting to know more about the rune and how it affected Clary, as I suspected it was not like the Owl or a possession; I am kinda relieved that Clary was in control and knew what she was doing because we have seen what that absence of autonomy does to people. I think that the rune just fed those deep darker impulses in her, along with encouraging positive emotions towards Jonathan. I think that Clary may have genuinely been starting to feel sympathy for Jonathan and definitely felt a pull to him that was simply because they are siblings.

Jace comforts her because he knows how hard it is to fight the pull of family, he himself has done things that he regrets in the name of family; some of his actions pertaining to Valentine, his mistakes while Head of the Institute after finding out he is a Herondale. He understands wanting to be close to your blood relatives and doing things out of the norm for them.

I love Clary’s line ‘I should have fought harder for this family’; she feels guilty for her actions and that she let go of her new family too easily. She loves them all so much, they are her family and she deeply regrets not fighting harder to stay with him.

I really like that Izzy asks Simon for help when she had refused it from her brothers, it really shows how much trust they have that she allows herself to be vulnerable in front of him and that she feels comfortable asking him for help. You could see this really begin when she opened up to him about her addiction issues, then when he needed her support at the end of 3A; it has been beautiful to watch their friendship grow and strengthen, now to watch it flourish into something new.  The entire scene was very sweet and softly intimate; you could feel the closeness and care between them.

Maia finding Jordan’s body was heartbreaking, Alisha’s acting was phenomenal and the song they played really heightened it. I actually did tear up because the emotion of the scene was so well built with the acting, the way it was shot and the song; it was very emotionally provocative.

At Jordan’s funeral you can see Maia pushing down her grief, closing herself off as a coping mechanism; not only because of all her complicated feelings about Jordan but also because she has taken up the mantle of Alpha. She has to think about the pack and knows that they need her to be a strong leader right now. That said I really hope that she doesn’t bottle it up too much and she is able to confide in someone, maybe Simon or Bat.

I really liked the little interaction between Helen, Aline, Izzy and Alec; it’s nice to know that Helen and Aline have grown close and I love Alec’s little smile at ‘research’. It was really endearing to see them holding hands as they were running through the grounds of Alicante and I am hoping the we get to see more of Heline in 321 and 322.

Alec and Izzy take up arms in the courtyard area; I have to give a mention to the extra who leapt up the stairs behind them, he saw his moment and he took it, very impressive.

I love that moment between Alec and Izzy, they are prepared to fight with everything they have and they will fight until the end together. It also hurts a little to see Izzy, who is usually so confident in her abilities, to be scared and turning to Alec for reassurance. I was a little scared for them but then a started screaming/cheering when Magnus destroys the Edomai that were heading for them; and his line ‘traffic was hell’ is fantastic.

The scene between Clary, Jonathan and Jace was actually filmed in Paris at the same time as the scenes in 312. It was great that they were able to generate the appropriate emotions for this scene given how different the emotions were in 312.

We find out that the rift facilitates an unending loop for the demons, they are banished and then return over and over; which is an absolutely horrifying prospect. Clary tries to appeal to Jonathan, she knows that he genuinely loves her and I think that part of her does hold some genuine love for him now, because after everything he is still her brother.

You think for a moment that it might work but you can see something in Jonathan break, he feels that he will never be loved no matter what he does; he has tried to be better and it didn’t gain him anything. So he is taking out his pain on those who have wronged him.

Clary’s emotions were expected but I did not expect for Jace to become so hopeless and fatalist in those moments; it was a bit of a shock but I think a good one. Jace is seeing his home being destroyed in front of his eyes and is faced with the reality of everything and everyone he knows and loves being taken away. They have been in bad situations before but this is the first time that he doesn’t see a way out.

I think that the moment between them is very tender and sweet, Clary trying to inspire some hope and fight in Jace; it felt very much like a goodbye, I also really liked that they flipped Jace’s statement from an earlier episode ‘until I die, and after that’. That they were taking this moment alone to say goodbye to one another before they jump into a fight they cannot win; again this was a very emotionally provocative scene.

Okay, are you ready? I know I do this every time we are about to go into an emotional Malec scene, but holy fuck this scene is absolutely heart destroying. I’m crying just thinking about it, I’m going to have to write through the blur of my tears.

Alec is panicking about Magnus being near him, he doesn’t want Magnus to lose his magic again because they are in close proximity. Also, I think that he is nervous of being near Magnus because he still loves him so much and it hurts to be around him and unable to show that love.

Magnus is having none of Alec’s refusals and tells him he knows about the deal, he needs Alec to understand that he doesn’t have to stay away anymore and that Asmodeus cannot hurt them again. He can see how much Alec is struggling in that moment and needs to let him know that he understands why he made the deal, that it’s ok. Magnus cannot bear to be apart from Alec for a second longer and is desperate to let Alec know that he doesn’t need to keep his distance.

Upon hearing this Alec cannot hold himself back and interrupts Magnus by grabbing him by the lapels and kissing him, he is desperate to have that closeness again; to be able to touch and kiss him, to know that they love each other. It is even more incredible when you think about the slight parallel to 112 in that Alec grabbed Magnus by the lapels and just kissed him, in those two moments all he could think about was kissing this wonderful man.

Also, the long shot of them kissing with Alicante burning in the background was absolutely stunning.

When they learn of the swords destruction you can see Izzy coming to terms with their imminent destruction, Clary and Jace huddle close together not being able to be parted from each other in what could be their last moments, and Alec only has eyes for Magnus.

Magnus, however, has walked towards the balcony and is looking at the destruction that is happening and you just know that he is about to sacrifice himself to save everyone, again. As he tells them about a way to strengthen his power he moves slowly back towards Alec, he has already made his decision and wants to be close to Alec in these last moments.

When Izzy says Edom Alec immediately begs Magnus not to do it, he has only just gotten him back and he cannot bear the thought of losing him again, to be parted so thoroughly. Magnus looks at Izzy, Clary and Jace; he wants to do whatever it takes to keep them safe, he cannot stand by and watch the people he cares about die, especially when he could have done something to stop it.

Alec begins panicking again because he still wants to marry Magnus and he didn’t get the chance to propose, he wants Magnus to know just how much he loves him and cannot bare the thought of Magnus leaving without knowing that. I didn’t think it would but ‘Needless to say’ pops back up and I am already crying. Magnus presents Alec with two silver rings. They are beautiful, simple yet elegant which suits them both so well; plus it looks like they might be inscribed and I need to know what they say dammit!

Plus, I love that after Magnus banished Asmodeus he left to go buy engagement rings.

I am absolutely sobbing when Magnus asks Alec to marry him, and uses his full name; you can see that he is a little nervous because he has never been married before and he may never have proposed before, even if he has it has been a rejection. Despite knowing how much Alec loves him, and had planned to propose himself, you can still see that flicker of doubt.

Alec replies by taking one of the rings and saying ‘Only if you’ll marry me too’ and I am gone; I think that this was so important because it was Alec saying to Magnus ‘I want to marry you, please will you marry me’. He wanted Magnus to know that he has absolutely no doubts about this whatsoever and it was Alec’s way of being able to propose too.

The shot of them putting the rings on is so beautiful, and Alec’s little gasp really gets me because he is so overwhelmed that he is going to marry the man he loves. He never thought he would experience genuine romantic love, never mind marry someone he is in love with, and now all of those deeply buried hopes are coming true. The emotion of both of their faces is just so beautiful and as usual I cannot fault Matt and Harry at all; I only ever have awe, admiration and love for them and their acting.

The close shot of their faces, going in for a kiss, is so beautiful; with the gold in the background. This entire scene has been shot so amazingly. Unfortunately they don’t get to kiss because an explosion occurs; Magnus looks towards the destruction with trepidation but Alec only has eyes for Magnus, he doesn’t want to look away from his fiancé because he knows the moment he does he will have to face the reality that Magnus is leaving.

Without looking at Alec Magnus walks to the balcony, he knows that if he looks back or lingers then his resolve is going to start wavering but he does look back when Alec speaks. ‘It’s only Edom. You always come back’, Alec has faith that they always come back to each other and that nothing can keep them apart for long. He cannot bear to think any other way, the only thing keeping him from begging Magnus not to go is that it is the only way and the belief that they will be together again.

Magnus is not so sure, there is a slight shake of his head that shatters my heart; he truly believes that this could be the last time he sees the man that he loves. He takes a moment to look and Clary, Jace and Izzy; he loves them so much and he is doing this for them, he wants them to know that. He tries to lighten the mood, as always and especially when he is doing something selfless, by saying ‘Never thought I’d be a runaway groom’.  He takes one last look at Alec and then enters the portal.

As Magnus disappears you can see Alec begin to break, the smile falls from his face and he walks to the spot where Magnus last stood trying to be as close to him as he possibly can right now. Unable to contain his emotions Alec falls to his knees crying, he looks like he might be trying to say something but is too choked up and devastated that nothing comes out, instead he breaks slumping where he kneels. This is the most emotional we have ever seen Alec, you can see the utter loss and devastation in his expression; the weight of all his feelings from the break up, the proposal and Magnus leaving all come crashing down on him at once. He is breaking under the loss.

Izzy, Clary and Jace are crying too; they just witnessed this beautiful profession of love and now they are seeing two people they love being torn apart; to see Alec, who is the most emotionally reserved of them all, completely break down makes them move. They surround him, offering him physical comfort, letting him silently know that they are there for him and that he doesn’t have to go through this alone.

It is at this moment that Alec finds the strength to look up to the sky, his expression is absolutely heartbreaking; he is absolutely destroyed. We see the rift being healed by Magnus’ gorgeous blue magic and this makes me cry even harder because it not only symbolises Magnus saving them but there is just something so heartbreakingly beautiful about seeing Magnus’ magic call back all the Edomai and light up the once red sky in blue. I can’t put it into words but it is so beautiful.

The last shot is of the four of them witnessing this and a slow close up of Alec watching Magnus’ magic, it is so beautifully soul destroying. I have watched this scene four times and I have sobbed my heart out every single time.

This episode was amazing and would have been the best season finale of the show I think, plus it’s the first Malec cliff hanger; Season 1 was Jace and Valentine, 2A was the Soul Sword, 2B was Jace, 3A was Clary. I know that I would have been screaming at the writers for leaving it there but can you imagine how amazing it would have been too; to know that Season 4 was going to be Malec centric, that a huge dark Magnus storyline was on the horizon; to have those months of theories and excitement for what was sure to be the best season so far. It would have been incredible, and it wasn’t even the original episode ending which was even more of a cliff hanger; I am excited to see what it was (we will see it early on in 321).

I am not ready for 321 and 322; I actually refuse to say the word finale out loud because I cannot cope with that right now. And I haven’t watched any of the Farewell videos from TV Guide because I cannot deal with any of that until I have seen 321 and 322. Even then, I am still going to be fight to save this show because it is too important and amazing to give up.