#and like kakashi said he IS a good guy to have on your side bc once he believes it he believes so hard

[faerociousbeast]

its really something how much naruto advocates for friendship and caring for others in part one considering how little of that was offered to him for most of his childhood. when he did receieve it it hit him so hard he can't stand for anyone taking it for granted

[teatitty]

What are your favorite tropes for kakairu? Sorry if you've written them I'm behind on reading your Naruto stuff aaaa what are you favorite things about them as a ship? What animals would they best be in your heart of hearts? What are their favorite ways to annoy each other?

Haven't had the time to write out any of the tropes I actually love for them yet but some of my fave KakaIru tropes are: Kakashi being a lowkey stalker and Iruka still falling for him anyway bc all Shinobi are weird like that; Tsundere Iruka and Kakashi being so so so self aware about it he is living his romance dreams; mission fic! I love a good 'have to go on a mission together' trope especially if its them bickering a lot and bonding throughout; office romance is just inherently baked into them lol but that too; Kakashi being one of very few people who can consistently invade Iruka's personal space and be touchy with him without consequence. This does not go unnoticed and everyone is [suspicious side eye] about it

Favourite things about them as a ship: Domesticity; two heavily traumatised orphans caring so deeply about the younger generations; Iruka not giving a single fuck about Kakashi's reputation and loudly arguing with him the same way he would anyone else; there's a myriad of interesting dynamics you can explore with them and just an absolute shitton of tropes and AU's ripe for the taking; they match eachother's freak; the amount of official art Studio Pierrot made of these two together makes me laugh; this is an anime only scene but Kakashi grabbing Iruka's hands just to give him Pakkun before leaving the village rewired my brain chemistry; ANBU Kakashi could've fixed a delinquent Iruka by fucking hi -

Animals they'd be: said it before Kakashi is obviously dog coded even back to his dad's moniker being "White Fang" and Iruka is a tanuki

Fave ways to annoy the other: There are so many we could not name all of them but Kakashi's favourite is turning in messy reports and Iruka's favourite is ruining Kakashi's cool guy image by telling the kids he loudly sobs at sad adverts about dogs

[oh-no-its-bird]

oh my god your fucking MIND I love this

Taking this and running with it + also replying to @poorwhayfairingstranger :

I said before that I think Houhua would have a bit of a moment w himself where he debates "ok do I want to go down the child prodigy route? Or should I stay middling to low, fly under the radar?"

On one hand, child prodigy sounds like a good way to raise his character importance and get some system points, but on the other hand, from what he remembers of Naruto it also sounds like a fucking EXELLENT way to get killed horribly. Or just grossly abused / eaten alive by the shinobi system

SO LIKE. LOOKING AT WHAT YOURE LAYING DOWN. HEAR ME OUT.

Houhua decides that he'd rather not show all his cards so soon and possibly doom himself preemptively with the child prodigy route, and after thinking a bit from an authors POV on what angle he should try to take, finds himself instead considering posing as the classic "bottom of the ladder shocks the world as they shoot to the top unexpectedly!" trope

This also leaves room for him to go generally ignored by any adults who might have caused him problems if he'd showed his skills, and slack off (read: do his own thing as he tries to collect enough points to survive the penalty of surviving the massacre) without suspicion

So like. Infamous Uchiha dead last Houhua.

(For a second I forgot the fucking timeline and almost said "This also has a side effect of giving Obito some slack among his clan. The kid may be a bit of a mess, but at least he's no Houhua! So give him a chance, yeah?" but then remembered Obito's fucking GONE already and we're well past that point, oops!)

(But like. do you think Kakashi would look at him and remember another crybaby ninja he used to know? Maybe.)

But yeah, infamous dead last Houhua. Throw in an occasional semi-public breakdown, let him be well known for being overprepared to a comedic degree and apparently terrified of death, and your golden! Nothing to see here, just a guy whos very clearly not cut out for the shinobi lifestyle but who's going for it either way because it's what's expected of him

NOW. Give me your fucking silly little guard dog "top of his class" Sasuke deciding that CLEARLY his new goal in life is to protect poor silly Houhua from uhh. It's unclear, actually, but probably just. In general everything.

Make this even worse bc Houhua's entire system given mission is "become close to the character of Itachi Uchiha then die on his blade to further his guilt"

(fuck. note to self as I write this: The system never specified that he has to die on his blade during the Uchiha massacre, only that he'd have to "die on his blade to further his guilt." I can totally do some "your mission never technically finished and has still been active all this time" bullshit with that later. Someone remind me to come back and think ab that later)

So like. Houhua has totally been hanging around Itachi and thus Sasuke, like, a lot as Sasuke is growing up. He probably helped babysit him n stuff! Sasuke is very familiar with him as 'big brothers loser friend'

Which probably only makes the protection worse. Houhua is a little bit perfect for Sasuke to project all of his good memories of Itachi onto without the conflict of remembering what his brother did <3

Anyways all of that is made even funnier by the fact that Houhua is powerful. He has decades of years of memories and experience as a master cultivator, and ok, maybe he wasnt the strongest of his time, but he was a fucking peak lord. And he knows how to spend his time if he wants to grind his skills in this world. And you can bet your ass that's what hes been doing in preparation for massacre day!

He just also throws everyone tf off his trail by just. Being himself. A shaky surface level coward who always looks 3 seconds away from bursting into hysterics about not wanting to die

You know that "trope" about how in naruto, you can always expect a jonin to have some sort of funky quirk going for them? How pretty much all ninja of a certain level just have something weird about them, or some sort of coping mechanism to rely on? Kakashi has porn, Gai is,, Gai, Jiriyah is. Jiriyah. Etc. etc.

I just think Houhua fits into that mold alarmingly well, with his near compulsive overpreparing and general uhh. Everything. Houhua-ness.

I think that after the massacre, he's kind of called out for his skills but only within a certain circle.

He survived Itachi (and Obito, who was also there if I remember correctly) when Sasuke was supposed to be the only one to survive, and that says something, even if some dont want to listen.

He's debating whether to let himself be called out for it or whether to stick to the bit, and ultimatley decides that he does NOT want to deal with the "gasp!! the silly little guy is actually,, powerful?" production rn when he has an armful of a sobbing Sasuke so he just kinda cries and babbles a bit and ultimatley lets people assume it was luck and Itachi being sentimental towards his childhood friend

(Danzo however, remains suspicious)

Eventually tho I do want Houhua to get called out, and it is important for his little narrative he's trying to follow along

He does smthn really impressive and everyone does the *gasp!!* shock!! surprise!!* routine but he immediatley starts crying, which makes them go *oh what was I thinking, clearly this is just good old silyl usless Houhua* while someone who actually knows what theyre doing, like Kakashi maybe, ignores the tears as they just go "no no what the FUCK was that. Dont change the topic WHAT WAS THAT"

Maybe he's eventually kind of strong armed into joining ANBU maybe? ANBU rat my beloved,,,

He can replace Itachi / Shisui on team Ro <3

No one on the squad he's placed into understands how the actual fuck he got here, even when watching him in action its a little hard to comprehend when he does do smthn impressive bc hes fucking whining and crying ab it the whole time

Oh!! Also! Its important to note that Houhua never found out that Itachi was pushed into doing this by the village btw. He never got that far in the manga! So he has no idea what Itachi's motivations are-- but, Houhua is an author himself and he's also not fucking stupid. He smells something fishy in the water.

So when the system gives him a new quest after his survival of the massacre, he's all too ready to fufill it.

"Find out the truth of the Uchiha massacre"

ALSO the system telling Houhua to get killed to give Sasuke agency would make him SO mad I think that is canon now. In my heart.

Umm anyways final thoughts: Final battle arc when Hashirama tells Sasuke his brother is strong and a hashtag good Konoha shinobi, Houhua would straight up punch him in the face. Send tweet.

For your Uchiha Houhua AU, system said "New Objective: Die". Know who else seemingly 'died'? Obito. Considering his experience back in the SVSSS 'verse, I can see him pull off an Obito and be on the run (with or without Sasuke, I'm not sure)

Houhua, panicking and knowing only that Sasuke is Important(tm) to the plot: Ok so if I just. Take him. Just take him and run. Would that increase my narrative weight enough to survive???

actually thats a really funny thought, I might pocket it. I think Houhua would have definitely considered it but like. It'd also get his ass hunted down by all of Konoha for stealing The Last Uchiha(tm)

The village wont take that lying down and unfortunately Houhua is not at the skill level needed to even begin to dodge that kind of effort looking for him-- not to mention Sasuke, who may or may not have been taken against his will.

[bitchiha]

Kakashi and/or Yamato NSFW headcannons? I high key love ur blog btw 🥺✨❤

A/N: UHM YES LETS DOOOO THIS I LOVE YOU BTW AND THANK YOU!! <3 Yamato and Kakashi are like.. my favs. So thank you. I wrote for both of them!

Another side note: I decided to post some requests b4 my angsts bc Im almost done them and I can't neglect them anymore. I am the worlds biggest procrastinator, but I am trying my best.

✎ NSFW (Yamato, Kakashi)

Kakashi

I mentioned this before but both him and Yamato are touch starved. The only difference is that Kakashi needs it more. Like Yamato can control himself a little bit at least, but not Kakashi. Like if he’s gone on a mission longer than 3 days Kakashi is losing his mind.

Best horny Kakashi is horny Kakashi after reading his nasty books. Hands down. Man, it just gets him so worked up because he’s not imagining the characters in the books. Noooo. He’s imagining you and him.

Once when he was reading Icha Icha in bed he was reading a particularly nasty chapter I hope you know where this is going... Once the chapter was done he put the book down and looked over at you like all sly and shit. All the sudden he’s like “come sit on my face.” And the way he says it is so like.. idk how to describe it, but it’s like sly and cocky and curious all at once.

First time you ever sat on his face and it was the closest thing that you’ve ever gotten to heaven girl. Like you were seeing stars.

He’s into anything and everything tbh. Wants to try everything he reads in Icha Icha for himself. Which is amazing bc there’s always something new he wants to try. Everytime.

Loves pet names. Definitely calls you a whole dictionary full of them and they vary depending on what you two are doing exactly.

He likes giving oral a lot tbh. Like a lot a lot. It’s probably bc he knows he’s so damn good at it lmfoaoaoao. He’s read this stuff a hundred times over in his books, so he knows how his tongue should be moving and all that good stuff. Wants you to sit on his face all the time bc he likes how good it makes you feel. Also, likes when you are vocal.

Likes lingerie but he will have it off you in 0.5 seconds so he can drill your shit tbh. You’d have to swat his hands away from trying to peel them off, but you can’t keep them away for more than 5 minutes.

Such a tease. He won’t admit it, but he actually likes making you cry when you're getting it on lol. Just a little. It makes him feel like he’s living out a scene in one of his books and it makes him so much hornier. Like he’s probably denied you 10 times now and so you’re just a mess and he gets so carried away. But when he finally gives in it’s the best dick ever. Bye lol.

Will want to do sooo much nasty things in public. He’d actually be good at hiding what the two of you are doing though, for the most part. I don’t think he’d do anything super crazy though. Mostly things that work you up to get prepared for when you two go home.

Has definitely done it with you in a public washroom. Clamped his hand on your mouth so you wouldn’t get caught and girl he rocked your shit good.

Kakashi is both an ass and tits guy, but you know what he likes better? Thighs. Loves having them wrapped around him, straddling him, lol likes his face being between them and anywhere he can grip them tbh. Like even in public he’ll have a hand somehow on your thigh 24/7. Doesn’t matter if their chubby, small, whatever. He. loves. them. Also loves hips.

Doesn’t mind if you ever wanna take the lead. Go down on him after he comes back from a mission. Shower w him, take a bath with him, literally just do it. But take care of him good. He will repay you later.

I don’t think he’s loud. Probably likes giving you validation a lot, but you’ll only get some noises out of him. That doesn’t mean he isn’t enjoying himself bc he is, my goooosh he is.

However, after missions he’s just too tired to stop himself and he will get a lottt more vocal. Plus it’s his tired voice so it’s 10x more attractive. Lots of Groans.

So like I said, he may not be loud but look at his face. You can tell he’s enjoying himself by his facial expression. Like if his eyes are squeezed shut and his mouth is open slightly you are making him see stars. Or if he’s really focused and intent, that’s when he is doing something he just read about in one of his books and boy is he enjoying it. Orrr if hes got a cocky smirk that’s when you know he’s gonna tease the life out of you.

Has dealt with Naruto, Sakura, Sai and Sasukes attitude problems all day. So if you wanna try and give him some at home he will lack the patience. Will be so rough and you’ll like it, but it will hurt to sit down for a few days.

Has 0 self control if you wear skirts or dresses. Like he just wants to put his hands under it. You look so pretty in them too and he can’t stop staring. Has definitely left your skirt / dress on when he’s fucking you at least once.

CEO of making you blush. Gets you flustered all the time. He literally can never get enough of you. Sometimes you’ll just catch him giving you that stare. Or just like checking you out and you’re like: Kakashi we are in the middle of the village control yourself.

You really can’t get him to be jealous. You’ve tried everything and anything but he never gets riled up. He can make you jealous, but he doesn’t do it a lot. I think the only time you can really get him worked up like that is if you unintentionally make him jealous. If he knows you’re trying to, he won’t let it work. But if you don’t know it makes him so flustered. Like if you tell him you’re going on a 4 day mission with Yamato. He’ll be pissed lol. Why the fuck didn’t Lady Tsunade tell you two to go together?? Why you and tree boy?

Then all the sudden he’s making out with you in the middle of your kitchen. Muttering under his breath about how unfair that is. Like this man is gonna have to sit here for 4 days by himself while you’re out on a mission with Yamato?? Frustrated sex lol. Also will definitely leave hickeys. Have fun covering them up on your stupid 4 day mission with yAmATo. <3

Another thing; you’ve done it on every surface possible in your apartment. The kitchen table, the bathroom counter, the shower, every gosh darn wall. Probably even on a chair at your dinner table... What can I say. HES WHORE KNEE

Yamato

You will definitely be eachother’s first times. If you’re with him you’re with him for the long run. He isn’t gonna give himself to anyone like that. Nope, you’ll know you’re stuck with him once he starts to get intimate.

That being said, I don’t know why but I don’t think he’d be very self conscious about himself tbh. Like he’s touch starved as fuck already and so inexperienced so like.. now that he’s experiencing physical contact like he’s never had before my guy is short circuiting. Any touch from you feels wayyy to good for him and he could care a less about anything else when he gets going.

Also, he’s kinda loud - like not the type to scream lol but I mean like .. if you’re making him feel good (literally anything you do makes him feel good tbh), then you will know. Looots of groaning and grunts. Omggg and if he needs to keep really quiet he will probably muffle his moans by burying his face in your neck or tits lol.

I don’t think he’s the type to dirty talk too much or degrade at all. The only time he will really get into dirty talk, being rough and maybe some degrading is if you make him jealous. It only works if you use Kakashi for it and my god you’re asking for trouble if you do

Say something like “wow Kakashi you’re really strong,” or laugh at all his jokes and Yamato will seethe quietly. You’ve got to keep that up for a while to get him super worked up and when you do.. HE WILL DEFINITELY GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO CRY ABOUT.

When you get home he drilllls your ass girl. Like you’re all teary eyed because he’s been denying your orgasms and now he’s drilling you into the mattress oml. You’re like begging him and sobbing and he’s so fucking mad lol like he doesn’t care

“Stop crying. You thought everything Kakashi said was just so funny tonight, so go ahead and laugh, laugh like how you were laughing with him. Not so funny now is it?” “Think he can make you feel like this? Didn’t think so.”

Will feel so bad in the morning. Like he’ll actually feel so bad. Will make up for it in any way you ask him too. You liked it though and you riled him up on purpose, you won’t tell him though. You 1000/10 do it again. Kisses you all over to make up for it.

Everytime you do, you can’t look Kakashi in the eye for a good week bc you’ll only think of Yamato drilling your ass.

Praise kink 10/10. He will probably be so depressed and will lowkey cry if you degrade him. What he likes is praise. Fucking fuel that mans ego and be a vocal for him too ;) he likes knowing that he’s rocking your shit good.

CALL HIM CAPTAIN like he’s not really into being called sir or daddy or anything like that but my lord.. if you call him Captain.. ugh. It gets him everytime. Also darling too.

Uhm he realllyyy likes when you take care of him after missions. Especially if it’s a long mission or one with Team 7 because that shit stresses him the fuck out. He’ll have so much frustration he’ll need to get out by the time he comes home.

Perch your ass on the couch and wait for him. Bonus if you cooked him food first. Or if you wanna run a shower for him while he eats. He will insist you join him.

Also... He’s not slick at all when he introduces ideas like that, he probably says it bluntly like.. “y/n.. I really want to take a shower with you right now.” and his face would get all red too lol

But after some missions he’s just way too tired to fuck your ass up. This is usually like after most of his missions with Team 7. He will still somehow manage to be horny tho. Like he’s been gone for days and had to deal with moody teenagers the whole time and he would really love if you just sucked his dick rn. That always reallyyy gets him going. Probably will cum fast bc of how good it feels to him tho, but there’s a lot of it y’know. He’d also be loud too. Like too lazy to try and keep it down loud. Lots of groaning.

Like I said, he’s horny as fuck. Literally being around you just turns him on sometimes. Even at home. Like If you wear a tank top with no bra when you’re lounging around, he’s already horny. Short shorts? Hor-fucking-ny!! Sometimes he’ll get embarrassed and hide it from you, but let’s be real you feel the same way about him so it’s fine

Titty guy 100%. I’m sorry but like if you have big tits don’t expect him not to bury his face in them. Always gives them extra attention. Likes when your riding him and their bouncing. Wear Lacey bras, he loves them so much and he will keep them on the whole time so he can just admire it on you.

He doesn’t like the idea of doing anything in sexual in public. He has a reputation to uphold and he is not about to throw it out the window like that no matter how much he wants too. Its frustrating sometimes bc like you could be walking around the village together and he gets a good glimpse of your ass and now he’s thinking some nasty things. Then he’s got a really uncomfortable hard on to hide till you get home.

He gives you splinters by accident sometimes. Like idk how. Especially if youre sucking him off. His hands are gripping your shoulders and you feel a prick on your collarbone and you yelp. He’ll apologize profusely, but he can’t control it when he feels like this so it happens sometimes. You get used to it though. Won’t admit it but he doesnt even try to control it if his dicks down your throat bc.. when you yelp it feels reallyyy good.

I’ve always had a thing for Yamato.. so I kinda went off on this LOOL <3

[allthingskakashi]

What if Kakashi is with a s/o who grew up in another village and was abused her whole life and people told her that it was her fault so she ends up getting revenge in the other village and Kakashi and team 7 saw her on a mission and not even Naruto's talk no jutsu can help so someone explained to them that Y/N has been through so much pain that no talk about kindness and friendship can help her so kakashi went to go confront her himself? PS I asked you because you know a lot about Kakashi :-D

Dhshshaj you really think i know a lot about kakashi??😩 pls that's the best thing anyone's said to me thank you so much ugh i wish i could major in Kakashi

Also damn not even naruto's talk no jutsu worked huh, that's some deep shit we're in. Also I'm so sorry this ran so fkn long this is almost a short story. Imma put this under the cut lol i got carried away big time

Okay so ig at first Kakashi would try to talk to you too even though he's prepared for it to not work. But it's still worth a shot and he'd try but he also understands why it's difficult for you to believe in something you've never known in life. So anyway whatever he says would invariably not work but that's okay cause he's come prepared. He didn't expect to convince you so easily anyway. So instead, he proposes a deal. He tells you that you don't have to believe him, all you have to do is allow him to let you see for yourself. He asks that you give him one month to prove to you that life doesn't necessarily have to be all bad, that with the right people you CAN feel love and friendship and kindness. And if after the deal is up, you still don't believe him, then you're free to go your own way and he wouldn't bug you again.

You're ofc a little hesitant at first but at the same time what have you really got to lose? So you decide to give him a chance and he suggests that you come over to his village as a guest and give him a month. The village elders are initially against this and say that they wouldn't allow someone who destroyed her own village to enter Konoha but after Kakashi tells them that you're completely his responsibility and he'd fully ensure that you don't bring harm to the village, they ultimately give in.

And so you come to Konoha, along with Kakashi and these other 3 weird brats. One seems like a moron, another an asshole and the other is plain annoying so you don't even know what's so good about them but Kakashi seems to put up with them, even adore them in a way. Once you set foot through the village gates, you see friends of theirs flock to greet them as soon as they come back. It's nothing you yourself have ever experienced and you watch as they all exchange pleasantries and the way these other people look so happy to have them back. You don't expect any of them to spare you a second glance but surprisingly enough, this weird man with horrible eyebrows asks you your name and offers to shake your hand. You're compelled to just blurt out an insult, those eyebrows are practically begging for it, but there's something so genuine about his smile that you feel yourself unable to. So you shake his hand reluctantly and Kakashi introduces you to each other. Afterwards, Kakashi makes sure you check into a decent hotel and promises to come back to pick you up the next morning for a tour around the village.

You almost wonder if you should just leave in the quiet of the night bc what is all this bullcrap good for anyway, what does that stupid guy know of pain or suffering or any of it but as much as you want to leave, you did promise you'd give it a while so you decide to stick through.

Days go by and you almost know the small village inside out in a few weeks, even the names of the man in the ramen store and the girl in the flower shop. They know you by name too and unlike people of your village, they don't look away when they see you. Instead they greet you with a smile, and treat you like their own. With kindness and warmth.

It's almost a routine for you to watch Kakashi and his students everyday when they train. Sometimes you even teach them some tricks of your own and you're pretty sure the look on Kakashi's face counts as 'impressed', even though he does try to be as subtle as he can. You've even kind of warmed up to the brats. Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura. They're not that bad after all and you have to admit that Naruto does make you crack up once in a while. You've never laughed so heartily like that before and the way Kakashi looks at you whenever you do, quickly glancing away the moment you catch him staring.. it's weird but it makes you feel something you can't quite explain.

Weeks pass by in the same way and you're almost like one of the villagers by now. Even the elders who were not so enthusiastic about your arrival have accepted you because of how skilled you are and what a great asset you'd make to this village if you stayed. You have people you can almost call friends now and it's weird what you feel but whatever it is, it makes you want to give life a chance. It gives you a reason to wake up everyday. It makes you feel things you've never felt before. It makes you want to smile and believe that the world isn't rotten.

And Kakashi.. you've been spending more and more time together lately and you've gotten to know so much more about him. Contrary to what you had assumed so arrogantly before, you come to realise that he too has gone through a lot. He too has endured pain in his life. But unlike you, he decided to fight and not give up. You find yourself sharing things with him you've never said out loud before to anybody and just to say aloud the things you've kept suppressed within yourself for years.. it almost made this horrible weight you've carried all your life lift off your heart and make you feel so much lighter.

And Despite how much you don't want to admit, or rather how much it scares you to, it's nice to have people in your life. You begin to think that maybe everyone isn't that bad. That maybe your life doesn't have to be filled with loneliness and suffering. That maybe you too can have friends or even...love. No matter how scary or how far off that seems. You realise that maybe you can still turn your life around and walk the right path, with people who will guide you through it. It won't be easy and may even take you all your life but unlike before, you're not so scared anymore. You're willing to try. Because you know someone who you're certain would be right by your side, holding your hand through it all.

[sabaku-no-livna]

Is your oc a Mary Sue ?

Okay I created this test back in 2016 on the french fandom, for the french fandom but its still so funny so if you want to try that test, please do. Don’t take it bad if your oc has several points doesn't make her Mary Sue and again these are only the clichés I noted, doesn't mean I got the absolute science on how to make a good OC and that my OCs does not correspond to these clichés or arn’t Mary Sues. Beware this test is full of sarcasm and second degree. Anyways ! Enjoy !

I. The design  of the OC  For your OC to be shitty, appearance is primordial. Therefor, I made you a list of clichés that you can try to cumulate to create a perfect Mary Sue. Are you ready ? At the end we’ll count the M.S points of our own Oc.  ღ Spiky hair, must be long, more likely black, red, yellow, with two colors that MUST be extra saturated ! You can take your favorite color if you want, it will work. Why thinking further ? xD  If you put two colors, make sure they clash with each other. Your hair style must be edgy, emo, so 2012 fashion with some bangs in front of the eye, nothing original please. Its weird to be original. AND WE DON’T WANT THAT. 

ღ  Piercings and tattoos are SWAG. But not any piercings or tattoo ! The labret is swag, the septum is swag, the eyebrow is swag, the belly button is swag but NEVER on the nostril its’s a golden rule of swag. Sorry. Have you ever seen an oc with a piercing in the nostril ? Nope, then don’t do that. Don’t try to invent new things. Originality is weird. 

ღ  About the body type, you got to stick to the canons : Huge breasts, large hips and butt, narrow waist (so narrow you don’t know how she can possibly bear her own weight). 

ღ If you REALLY don’t have any design ideas it doesn't matter. Make a gender-bend of Naruto or Sasuke. IT WORKS. 

II. The back story of your OC

For your OC to fit in the story like some shit falling on top of carbonara pastas, your backstory must be as CHEATED as possible. It must affect the main manager plot a maximum, just to enhance your oc. NEVER FORGET IT : Your OC is the center of the world. 

ღ Lets start by the beginning. For the name of your OC take some name that sounds Japanese. You can even invent one, as long as it sounds Japanese its perfect. To do so, insert some “ki” “ko” “su” “shi” “mi” et you got a name ! 

ღ Here is one of the supreme principle : Your OC is the most gorgeous, intelligent and strong. Its legit ALL THE MEN IN THE PLANET are desperately in love with her. 

ღ Your OC must be paired, or have had an affair, with at least one of the canon characters (better if its a main one) of the anime. Leave Shoji and and all the other Rock Lees for the ugly ones, YOU got Sasuke and Naruto waiting for you in your bed. So here’s a list of decent crush for a Goddess like your OC : 

Sasuke, Itachi, Naruto, Kakashi, Neji, Gaara, Madara, Deidara. Others are for the ugly ones. Don’t touch it, may have diseases ... :/ 

ღ  As your OC is the strongest, she must have super badass jutsus and have a chakra of ALL TYPES AT A TIME, she must master ALL the technics, and the must is her having an demon within. If possible a demon with tails (we don’t know why it wasn't mentioned in the manga but WHO CARES ?) that would be stronger than all the canon demons combined ! OR she can cumulate all the demons. Another SWAG thing is to have special pupils. If you don’t have the creativity to invent some, just use the sharingan/byakugan, or directly the rinnegan. OR you can cumulate them. Do like Sasuke ! This guys was clever. He knows the secret of success. 

ღ  Your OC must FUCK the game, so don’t hesitate to make her a princess, a vampire, a Rage, or even a Goddess. SHE IS TOO HOT TO BE HUMAN. Regular shinnobis are for people with no ambitions. 

ღ When you have to describe her personality always indicate this : “sweet, shy, friendly, cold, mysterious, choleric, courageous.” How is it totally paradoxal ? WHO CARES ? It doesn't have to be accurate in your character in her story anyways, that’s just for the presentations. For your OC to be really obnoxious she has to have a shitty personality. She has to clash every canon characters, be a burden for everyone else, OR, the opposite, a fuckin’ Deus Ex Machina ! Your girl she would have kicked Madara’s emo ass in a sec ! 

ღ  Her relationships with the canon characters are VERY IMPORTANT. Try the hidden blood binding. It’s SOOO original. Incest is not to provide, we all love what’s forbidden by the law and morals ! But always use main characters first, and don’t hesitate to put your character in a canon team, even if you have to kick off Sakura to do so (after all who cares for her ?). And for secondary but popular characters such as Itachi, Gaara and Neji ... Well as long as they are canons and popular ! Its better if they are in the Akatsuki or Kages though ! The best thing would be to be the hidden maleficent twin of Sasuke and have an affair with him OR Naruto’s genderbend paired with Itachi. The really SWAG clans you can put your OC into if you got no creativity to create an over powered shitty clan are : Uchiha, Uzumaki, Namikaze and Otsutsuki, and Hyuga only if there is no more room in the previous I quoted. 

ღ  Your OC must have a tragical backstory, horrible and complicated, incoherent or completely empty and lacking of depth cumulating all the best clichés of the fandom. 

In the first case your OC is broken by her past traumatic experiences, which gives her a dark side, a madness within, an emo vibe. She must be complaining all the time about her misunderstood pain. 

In the second case, your OC must be cheesy, always smiling and enthusiastic for no reason, and be a little stupid. Okay VERY stupid. But well ! She has big tits at least ! So its fine. Her biggest trauma must not exceed in terms of violence her little brother finishing the Nutella. 

ღ  Or, you can also try having a SUPER weak OC. Because with Mary Sues you are either TOO strong or TOO weak. No nuance please. It would make your character too credible. AND WE DON’T WANT THAT. Your OC must be rejected by everyone, hated and underrated (#victimlol) only her One True Love will see the light behind her shaggy hair. 

ღ If you are a bit CrAzY you can invent a country where she’ll be on top, but the best is for her to come from Konoha. Stay on the right track. 

I think I gave you all the best tips I had to make an OC perfectly obnoxious. ♥ To illustrate my own sayings, let me introduce you, my own Mary Sue : 

Suskiki Uchiha ! 

Name : Suskiki Uchiha

Age : Immortal 

Team : 7 (who cares about Sakura anyways ? Lol) Family : parents : Fugaku and Mikoto Uchiha / big brother : Itachi / twin brother : Sasuke / cousin : Naruto (yes its possible) Personality : Has big boobs Love interests : Sasuke, Naruto, Itachi, Gaara, Deidara, Suigetsu, Kakashi, Peter Pan, Edward Cullen and Jon Snow Story : Suskiki is the hidden sister of Sasuke. Not so hidden bc she is in team 7.  For real she is the princess vampire of and has the power of emo. Her childhood was so terrible you cant imagine. What was it ? Idk you cant imagine i said ! She supports Naruto since childhood bc they were both rejected. Why ? Bc she was too beautiful duh ! She has in her the demon Nyan cat dragon of darkness the most powerful of all ! She has both sharingan and byakugan for no reason (maybe her mom had an affair ?).  NOW LETS TRY THIS QUIZZ : 

Does your OC have : 

1)  Spiky or flashy hair ? 2)  Piercings/tattoos ? 3) Big breasts ?  4) Is she the female equivalent (physically) of a canon character ? 5) Was her name picked randomly because it sounded Japanese  ? 6) Are several canon characters into her ? (3 and more is yes).  7) Is she paired with one of the decent canons quoted before ?  8) Has she got a demon ? 9) Has she got special pupils ? Is she from a SWAG clan ? (if not you suck) 10) Does she have a special statut ? (princess, vampire, kage ...) 11) Is she “ “sweet, shy, friendly, cold, mysterious, choleric, courageous.”  at the same time ?  12) Does she have any blood binding with one of the canon characters ? Marriage doesn’t work.  13) Incestuous with one of the canons ? 14) Is she part of one of the main teams of the Naruto gen ? 15) Has she got a tragic back story ? 16) Is she bad at everything/super powerful ? 17) Was she rejected ?   18) Does she come from Konoha ? 19) Does she look like the  character she is paired with ?  20) Was she part of the Akatsuki or did she join Orochimaru ? 

So now you can count your points and it will give you a grade over 20. The closer you are to 20 the most Mary Suish your OC is. I personally tested it on Yukiko she got : 6 points. And you what is your score ? ;)

[keepyourpantsongohan]

Ayesha Liveblogs Naruto Shippuden S20 (Pt. 4)

Hashirama’s “:O” face at everything is so endearing

Hagoromo is now really the time for a family story there are three children and a sad old man in need

“It was a few thousand years ago” Zetsu just said it was 1,000 years ago how bad are you guys at telling time 

I wonder how Hashirama feels about Madara being his Soulmate™

“I want make sure [the Tailed Beasts] don’t fight amongst each other, and that people don’t use their powers for evil” better 2 have tried and failed I guess 

“That’s because a toad’s dream is destiny” weird flex but ok

“So then, will everything I do now be meaningless?” “Don’t waste your time worrying” Ffgkjhfgkjh damn I didn’t ask for a lecture on fatalism in my Naruto liveblog

Lmao @ this dude revealing his thievery scheme after talking to Hagoromo for 0.5 seconds what makes him think everyone will be on board with it 

“I only want you to go away as soon as possible” ah looks like Hagoromo made a friend lmao 

“If we make it too sturdy, you’ll break your bones when you try to destroy it” they actually did a really good job of making Hagoromo charming like consider me charmed I wanna hear abt ur ninja way

Hahahah I admire Futami for not bringing up the horns for the entire length of time it took them to build the bridge 

Futami: Hagoromo-sensei gave me a high-five one time and it touched my heart so I formed a cult around him

Wait if Hagoromo only gave 8 disciples chakra are the nine of them together responsible for fathering all the shinobi world what kind of Gengis Khan fuckery

Minus the Hyuga, who, for some reason are moon aliens, I guess

“Throughout this long history men appeared, one after another, with the desire to use the tailed beasts for their own evil purposes. And that turned the tailed beasts against mankind. Anyway, back to my story.” Hahahaha did Hagoromo just go “(A/N: Fuck Obito and Madara lol)”

Unbelievable you’re telling me there was someone who wanted to get with this old man with horns and three eyes who leads a cult and you won’t show me WHO where is the justice 

OH HEY FUTAMI HELPING RAISE THE KIDS I GUESS? WILD

Mmmm I love Ashura already 1000/10 endearing impulsive baby

Some filler storyboard artist who I respect beyond reason: But what if... we added.... a dog

“It might even be bigger than yours” please don’t tell me they fished Zetsu out of the river

"I didn’t realize you thought so deeply about [chakra being used as a weapon]” “Yeah, well” “But then again, what will be, will be” what kind of parenting is this Hagoromo kjhgkjhgkjhg

Indra, 10 years old: I am concerned about the ethical impact of my innovation

Hagoromo: YOLO, son ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

“I’ll be watching you” Is that the voice of......... Pubescent Zetsu 

LMAO IT IS

These kids are really emotionally unprepared for the boar considering they were following boar tracks into the woods 

ARE YOU SHITTING ME THEY EVEN USED THE SAME FILLER DOG NAME LMAO WHO IS WRITING THIS 

I CANNOT BELIEVE THEY KILLED THE DOG I’M SO MAD

Wow @ them having Indra invent chidori instead hkjhgkhg poor Kakashi

Indra awoke his sharingan over losing his dog I cannot believe this how are dogs the central plot device of multiple arcs

“Whatever is in this village belongs to everyone - that’s the law” wow along with fatalism this arc is also teaching us about the practical failings of communism 

“The law is still the law” where’s the post that says Sasuke is ethnically a cop. Because that’s this arc

Not 2 be that gal again but Indra’s voice is also nice on the ears he has inherited his grandmother’s kekkei genkai of having an attractive voice and a terrible moral compass

...............kekkei grandma 

“Looking into his eyes reminds me of my mother’s eyes” I was kind of joking about the kekkei grandma thing but fair

“At that moment I felt that I understood for the first time why heaven had blessed me with two sons” have you ever considered your eldest son is mean in part because you make comments like this 

“What will the two of you do when you are out in the world alone” wow Hagoromo is giving his kids some kind of High-Stakes Bell Test 

Hahaha I like Taizo I hope they don’t do anything to him but they probably will because he’s had so much screen time

HAHAHAHA I LOVE THIS SQUAD it’s the first ninja team and the boy is the healer!!!

Ashura: OH NO I’VE FORGOTTEN HOW TO GENJUTSU

Kanna and Taizo: WE GOT U BUDDY WE GOT BATS

I thought I was going bananas for a sec but the intro did change lol 

Poor Tenzo I think he’s been officially discarded from OPs RIP

Side note: Having a Naruto blog has made me so wary of Kakashi and Sakura standing next to each other I don’t trust the ppl on this website to be normal for a second RIP x2

“They’ll suffer, sure, but everyone dies eventually” okay calm down Taizo

“It doesn’t matter whether it’s possible or not, because I’ve decided to do it” I admire Ashura’s blind optimism lmao

Not to poke too many holes but why would the water in the well not be affected by the Divine Tree

I take my comment about healing back ludicrously all the men get to display chakra natures and the women can only display glowing yin chakra hands booooo

Omg there is a Tenzo after all in an ED at least!! This is the first time I’ve seen all three members of the Naruto’s Dad Association in one place!!! Bless up

A shot of them standing all together!!!! My heart!!!!!!!!

SASUKE AND NARUTO’S GRINS AT EACH OTHER I WEEEP

[Hagoromo as Kakashi voice]: TEAMWORK!!

I was very much expecting Indra to go crazy and kill those two guys but wow that was a scene

“Enough to make you fall in love with him and follow him all the way here” At least Ashura gets like a real wife instead of Hagoromo’s ‘ ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ she dead’

Hagoromo: Indra’s a dick because his eyes are red trust me it has nothing to do with my parenting I’m a chakra scientist

“Indra, just what is the meaning of this” it’s a temper tantrum lmao

Was it really necessary to kill both of those guys Indra one best friend death usually suffices for mangekyo my dude

Minato joining Kakashi in the club of Boyz Who Jutsu Was Plagiarized

Hagoromo really has absolutely zero hesitation to attack his son and you wonder why Indra has a complex

“THIS IS THE POWER OF OUR BOOOOOND” he said, as he punched his brother in the face with a thousand wooden hands (mood)

Indra’s Lightning Teleportation Jutsu is really doing The Most the Raikage is not nearly this dramatic about it 

Can you... just.... declare that your soul will be reincarnated? Is that how that works? 

Also. Who slept with Indra?! U made him out to be like. Very Not Okay. But he’s the forefather of the Uchiha?? WHERE ARE THESE CHILDREN COMING FROM TELL ME WHO IS BANGING THIS OUT OF CONTROL FAMILY

Hahahahaha I’M SO READY FOR THIS RIDICULOUS TEAM 7 TRYING TO UNMASK KAKASHI EPISODE BRING IT THE FUCK ON

I knew the Sukea voice would be different but omg I’m still thrown

“S-kay-a” is really not how I thought that would be pronounced wow 

“If I’m able to capture this Kakashi guy without a mask on, it’ll be the biggest scoop since the Leaf was established” a little arrogant Kakashi but okay kjhgkjhgkjhgjhg

This is such an adorable and weird bonding exercise of Kakashi teaching his kids how to break into Konoha’s archives I’M WHEEZING

I would pay money to see Kakashi explain what he was doing to all those dudes in ANBU who probably thought he was intimidating as all fuck catching him a wig with three twelve-year-olds breaking into his own file

“Who cares what I look like anyway!” THIS IS SO DUMB I LOOOOVE IT

“I think that a woman might’ve drowned right over there on the river bank” HINATA!!!!! UR TOO NICE TO BE ENLISTED INTO THIS SCHEMING HAHAHA

Oh I remember seeing reference to this scene booooo do they really have to make it weird all the time

This concept is even MORE ridiculous in the show bc it expands beyond Team 7 to all the other Konoha rookies like Kakashi how much do u enjoy teasing the children that this is how you’re spending your day

HAHAHAH Kakashi is lucky that the person who knows him best has face blindness and can’t call him out for his schemes 

Okay not to betray my own brand but ᵏᵏᵍᵃᶦ ᶜᵘᵗᵉ

They really designed a nicer apartment for Kakashi just so they could animate his silhouette in the shower STUDIO PIERROT PLEASE

Fhkjhkjfhkjhkf that last scene made me so uncomfortable I don’t really like seeing Kakashi’s mouth while he talks it’s weird

You know I spent a lot of this interlude chanting main arc main arc in my head but alas now that we have arrived I’ve remembered that the war arc climax is a mess

“If my chakra runs out, I’m done” seriously Obito.......... how are you here

Can you imagine if Naruto actually died.... what would that even mean for this series I can’t imagine 

“I already marked this space, so I can hide out in my time-space” I want to know how Obito “marks a space” is it like a jutsu or does he just have to nod at it and go “my space now”

 I would also pay money to see what Obito and Sakura talked about when they had to hang out in Kamui for a solid two minutes lmao 

“So you’re friends with sensei huh?” “Yeah it’s complicated but I think we’re cool now” “Yeah, same with us and Sasuke” “Sorry about that” “I don’t forgive you but thanks”

“You alright?” define ‘alright’ but also Obito’s never been alright a day in his life, Sakura 

Uh oh foreshadowing to the heavy gravity space where Obito d*es

Okay maybe this is the part of me that is still clings to their Part I friendship but Sasuke helping Sakura stand really brings out my inner soft bitch

 “It would’ve been helpful if we could’ve received this advice a bit earlier” Tobirama’s bitter about sitting through five episodes of filler

Tobirama: Why haven’t u been helping this whole time

Hagoromo: It all comes down to Madara’s magic pelvis—

“This man lent me his power and that’s why we were able to get here” does Sakura not know Obito’s name either khgkjhgjkgh

How many times will we watch these same two flashbacks of Obito’s life

Looks like Kakashi brought a knife to a taijutsu fight LMAO

God Rin is such a good friend to Obito and he repays her by literally defacing her grave 

“Am I powerless to do anything but sit here and watch” it’s not really your fault you can’t fly Kakashi tho u could try throwing some kunai or smth ur not a one sharingan pony

Ddkjhsdkjhd why does Obito get a line worrying about Naruto’s death but Kakashi doesn’t he’s spent the past two days trying to kill Naruto

I’m still emo abt Kakashi trying to die for Sasuke that’s his soooon

“Rin... this time, let’s spend some alone time together, just you and me” Why phrase it like that, Obito

"Why save someone useless like me” Kakashi get some therapy

“A fool full of only mistakes” it’s hard to disagree with Zetsu when they’re flashing back to every mistake Obito has ever made

Where’s the graphics set where Obito goes ‘admittedly I lost my cool here’ because that’s what that flashback was 

Update: found it

“Don’t cry, Obito, you’ll just get laughed at” this fantasy is an indication that Obito has no real comprehension of how fucked up Kakashi was by Rin’s death

Can you believe that Rin still dies in Obito’s jonin AU like....what. It’s not even like “AU of what I want” it’s like “AU where I learn how to cope with trauma” 

Also was this just an out for not designing an adult Rin bc he’s been thinking about Rin endlessly for like three episodes straight so..... what up with that

It’s still so fucking funny that Iruka’s in Obito’s jonin fantasy like when did they meet did he just absorb secondhand Iruka appreciation from Naruto 

“But, if you screw up, I won’t hesitate to step up as a candidate for Hokage myself” yesssssssss let Kakashi be the playful menace he truly aspires to be

Gjghjkhgjhg Obito’s “euuuuuuuuehhhh” when the paperwork dropped was funny

Sasuke’s face when Sakura punched Naruto was also v funny 

Honestly to be real for a second Obito imagining himself as buddies with Team 7 makes me mad u’ve done nothing but make these kids’ life TERRIBLE until today babysitting license REVOKED!!!!!!

Am I a hypocrite for enjoying AUs ft. Obito? Mayhaps!!!

“You told me that saving you was pretty much the same as saving the whole world, remember?” (Well.)

“I’d say, you did your best” You know that post that said it makes sense that Rin said this bc she’s a Scorpio. I’m still upset about it

You know... Naruto’s “the coolest guy” (“nothing but awesome”) comment about Obito is a direct parallel to “Bravest man I ever knew” in HP and that’s why, if I were to meet either adult man, I would dropkick both of them. In this essay I will—

“It’s kind of annoying seeing [Kakashi] all stiff and useless” u right Obito

Kishimoto pick up the phone I just want to talk about that rabbit bijuu design 

“A Susano’o? But whose?” DAD’S HEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRE

Kakashi with Six Paths Power REALLY feeds into my theory that Kakashi is Hagoromo’s transmigrant 

THAT’S MY TEAM READY TO SAVE THE WORLD TOGETHER!!!!!

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 KAKASHI GETS HER VULNERABLE AND THEN THE BOYS ATTACK WHILE KAKASHI GUARDS THEIR BACKS AND SAKURA FORCES HER INTO PLACE THIS IS WHOLEASS TEAMWORK

“I really love you guys” YEAH HE DOES 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Okay arc over haha right guys we’re good now RIGHT GUYS??

In part, Kakashi jumping around to save his students feels very much reminiscent of Part I’s “MY SENSEI SENSES ARE TINGLING” swoop and scoop that he and Gai loved to do

Lmao @ Kaguya spitting Madara out like he’s a bad-tasting vegetable

Coming up with an OP specifically for VOTE2 is so extra but I kind of love it the Diver parallels!!!!

Sasuke is SUCH a liar abt his attitude towards Team 7 - more specifically towards Sakura and Kakashi bc he has already granted that he cares for Naruto

Sasuke: Comrades? I don’t know her

Also Sasuke: Constantly urging Sakura and Kakashi to get to safety and actively intervening when they’re not

“Honestly at this point I don’t think anything could shock me anymore” Sakura really needs a hug and a nap

“I shall be sure to ask Obito tell me that tale in the afterworld” the real question is if Obito will still look 12 when he takes Hagoromo on the harrowing journey that is his life

Kakashi truly has endless love in his stupid ass heart Obito’s like, “Hmmm... whoops sorry 4 committing mass murder” and Kakashi’s like “Hehe, we all mess up sometimes :) See u in heaven”

Madara and Hashirama really did invent being in gay love huh

WOW I WAS NOT EXPECTING TO TEAR UP BUT KJHFKJHFKJH MY BABY BOY SAYING GOODBYE TO HIS DAD HE IS THE WORLD’S BIGGEST SWEETHEART

“You’ve now finally settled things with Madara” Tobirama has been waiting for like a hundred years for his brother to get over his ex

Hagoromo: Naruto’s your new conference room congrats kids 

Mmmmm I don’t like aaaaannnnnny of this

“You’re suggesting that I enjoy a roooOoomance” why say it like that Sasuke

I genuinely think this is the maddest that Kakashi’s ever been at Sasuke that boy is very, very grounded

“I, too, had two children at one time” OMG KAKASHI OFFICIALLY DESIGNATED TEAM 7 DAD BY HAGOROMO (ur miscounting tho Kakashi actually has four (4) children)

“I think I shall let Naruto handle this” said Hagoromo, and everyone who encountered any problem in this series ever

I’m very distracted from Sasuke’s dictatorship speech by the fact he looks so much like an alien. What is UP with his eyes they never look like this???? Why are they so far apart and narrow and angled

“Your blood will be the last that I shed” what r u just gonna keep genjutsuing ppl Sasuke? Could just keep the Tsukuyomi on then, homie

It also plays into the Hagoromo and Kakashi are related (spiritually or literally) that Hagoromo is equally as useless with advice to him lmao

Kakashi: What should I be doing, sir?

Hagoromo: Sometimes I like to pray :) 

Fjkkjgkjhgkjhk Sasuke claiming that Naruto is his only bond never ceases to amaze me like Sakura and Kakashi are RIGHT THERE ghkjhgkjhgkj u have been protecting them this whole time while they shout how much they care abt u. Just admit u have a crush on Naruto and go!!!

“I know your heart well by now. And you mine” Sasuke u unintentionally romantic dumbass

“Finally decided to kill me, huh,” said a thrilled Sasuke, taking a lesson from the Kakashi School of Very Much Needing Ninja Therapy

This entire fight is the Life or Death equivalent of this tweet:

Lmao one of these boys lost a tooth I want to know which of them has a dental implant 

Omg............... Iruka what is going ON.... u are suddenly v pale and also I think ur VA might be different could they not get the same Iruka or has he just forgotten how Iruka sounds

It was real unclear until this fight that Sasuke had any of the same powers as Nagato

“Now I can finally be alone... farewell, my one and only... friend” again... Sasuke... u can be in love with Naruto and still have other friends!!!!!!! Ask Naruto he has tons of friends he’s not in love with*

*Disclaimer: they are all in love with him

The idea that everyone Naruto’s ever cared about is spiritually trying to help him kick Sasuke’s ass is p funny

“Sakura and Kakashi are still there, they’ll figure something out” cute that you have such an assload of faith in your loved ones in ur life-flashing-before-you moment Sasuke but with what jutsu lmao

“I began to see a shadow of my own family in Squad 7″ YEAH HE DID  😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I still can’t believe that Kishimoto really wrote that all it took for Sasuke to return to Konoha was Naruto explaining to him how love and empathy work 

Omg Sasuke laughing...... I missed your laugh you precious boy

“Release the infinite Tsukuyomi once I’m dead by transplanting my left eye into Kakashi or someone else” Fhjfhkfh it detracts a little from the significance of Sasuke offering his eye to Kakashi to add the “someone else” but I guess they gotta make the syllables match up

Why is every Uchiha’s long-term plan just to die before they have to deal with the consequences of their actions

“I’m sorry” “Sorry? For what” “For everything” “You got that right” Sasuke I think u need to treat all of ur teammates to ramen 

“It’s finally back to the way it was” Kakashi loooves his baaabies 

TENZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO 

Omg they included Guren from the filler arc in this crowd hahahaha

Gaara and Naruto enveloped in that same beam of light like Kakashi and Tenzo in the Tsukuyomi kghjghkgh SP said gentle gay rights

“I’m forbidden to talk about it” Team 7 would RIOT if Sasuke was locked up in a cell like that fuck you

Hahahaha I wish I could see the scene where Kakashi and Iruka decided to ambush Naruto with study materials 

Okay this is definitely a different Iruka ahhhhh weird I don’t like it

Iruka bursting into tears whenever Naruto talks about his progress.... same

I 100% believe that the vast majority of the reason Kakashi became Hokage was to pardon Sasuke but also that prison scene still seems appalling to me STOP MAKING THINGS WORSE THAN THEY WERE SHOWN TO BE

"Maybe next time” is super funny in the context that he does take her on his next mission outside the village and comes back with one (1) whole baby

Sasuke’s introspection usually seems to amount to “Birth is a curse and existence is a prison... oh hey Naruto <3″ 

The moral of the story seems to be that the best way to show someone you love them in ninja language is by telling them you want to keep punching them for the rest of your life

[nctloveclub]

neighbor || kakashi hatake

prompt: “Next time you have sex next door, try to be quiet." + “Can you not keep me up by having sex constantly, there are people trying to sleep.” MODERN AU

warnings: cursing, sex (no smut)

a/n: this is my first naruto imagine and its gonna be with my fav kakashi also im gonna tag Jo @hokage-sama so i hope you like the imagine !! also I'm specifying that you live in an apartment or it wouldn't make sense lol also i made the job vague bc i was indecisive

masterlist + part two

You dreaded you work, you always came home late and had to wake up early. But in the end it wasn't that bad, the thing that really bothered you was the fact that your neighbor has sex, a lot and because of them you could never sleep. So you sat at your work, trying to finish some last minute tasks so your boss wouldn't bitch at you and constantly looking back to the clock, waiting for your shift to end.

Once the clock read 10:30pm, you gathered your things and left. You took your time to get home, even though it was late you lived close by. The streets were nearly empty as you walked home and you enjoyed the silence. You scrolled through your phone and laughed as you watched vines. You arrived to your apartment building and treaded your way up flights of stairs. As you took out your keys to unlock your door, you heard footsteps and a high pitched laughter.

“You’re such a charmer Kakashi.” You heard the woman say as the couple walked past you and into your neighboring apartment. “Ass.” you mumbled to yourself as you entered your apartment. You were greeted by your dog, jumping and pawing at your legs. You let out a small laugh as you bent down and petted the small pug’s head. You got up and walked to your kitchen, grabbing a treat and feeding it to your pug. You sighed, walking towards your bathroom and turning on the shower.

You quickly showered and changed into a large t-shirt and some comfortable panties. You hopped onto your bed and turned on your phone, scrolling through  your Instagram feed. You turned off your phone and plugged your phone into its charger. You heard your dog come into your room and you smiled, sitting up to bring him onto the bed. You laid on your side and the small pug curled up next to your body. You closed your eyes as felt sleep overcome you.

Unfortunately, that sleep didn't last. You were awoken by loud moans, consisting of ‘fuck’ and ‘Kakashi’ and a slight banging sound coming from the wall. You let out a groan and sat up, careful not to wake up your sleeping dog. You turned on your phone checking the time. The screen lit up and read 12:30am. You stood up and made your way out the apartment and walked to the left, stopping at your neighbor’s apartment.

You did not to hesitate as you knocked harshly at the door. The sounds were cut off and you heard someone coming to the door. The door opened and a flushed and shirtless man, who you assumed to be Kakashi, appeared. “Hey, I was wondering, can you not keep me up by having sex constantly, there are people trying to sleep you know.” You say harshly, crossing your arms. The silver haired man looked you up and down, and in the moment you realized you weren't wearing much clothes.

“Well hello to you too.” The man replied, leaning against his doorway, a smirk on his lips. “Could you keep it down in there? Some people work in the morning, you know that right?” You say. “I’m aware. You like what you hear?” He asks smugly. “You wish perv.” You scoff.

“Well the names Kakashi and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t call me a perv.” Kakashi said and you shake your head. Kakashi didn’t move and you looked at him, taking the tall guy in. He was pretty attractive once you really looked at him, it didn't help that he was literally having sex with another women no more than 5 minutes ago. “You like what you see?” He asked, a smirk evident on his face. You felt your cheeks burn up, turning a pale red. You quickly changed the subject before Kakashi could notice your red cheeks.

“Whatever, next time you have sex next door, try to be quiet.” You say as you walk back to your apartment, not knowing Kakashi was watching your barely clothed figure. He heard the door close and walked back into his own apartment, seeing the random women sitting on his bed. “So where were we?” She asked and Kakashi shook his head no. “I feel beat, I’m sorry.” He said, plopping onto his bed and laying down, facing away from the women. He heard her huff and felt her weight leave the bed. Moments later, he heard his door open and close.

Meanwhile in your apartment, you were back in your bed, your dog still in the same position as he was when you left. You smiled to yourself, not hearing anymore noises. You heard an unreasonably loud slam of a door and reduced that the women Kakashi was with left. Before you fell asleep your mind raced about Kakashi, maybe he is someone worth getting to know. Unbeknowest to you, Kakashi laid in his bed, feeling the same way you did.

I hope that was good lmao, that was my first naruto imagine also i hope the ending wasn't confusing ??? like the last paragraph is like what was happening in your apartment at the same time as what was happening at kakashi’s

As always feedback is appreciated

[sufferthesea]

Pink Peonies (Kakashi/Reader) Part 3/5

I wish I could add a boiled egg to my ramen, but eggs make me sick )): Luckily I can enjoy as many eggs as I want in Fanfiction Land! (Sorry for any grammar/spelling errors! Feel free to *kindly* point them out so I can fix them!) 

A/N: RIP editing on Tumblr is awful. I had to remove the InteractiveFics box bc it wasn’t working properly and Tumblr kept removing all the edits I did grrr. 

Words: 2.776

Rating: General 

Read part one here: ao3 // Tumblr Read part two here: ao3 // Tumblr  Read on ao3

Tagging: @thetoxicstrawberry​ @thefoxthief​ 

“Wait,” Kiba said slowly, looking from Ino to Sakura with an expression full of suspicion. “So you’re telling me somebody came into your shop and stole six flowers?” “Not just any flowers,” Ino stressed. “Peonies. Pink ones. They’re so pretty - and kind of expensive. They’re really nice flowers and I’d like to find them. My parents left me in charge of the shop and if they find out that somebody stole merchandise, I’ll —” She froze, eyes shooting to the size of saucers. “OH NO!” she screeched, turning white as a sheet. “My parents! They’ll be back from dinner soon! And I left the shop unattended! I didn’t even put up the Closed sign! I’m gonna be in so much trouble!” Frantically, she grabbed a fistful of Kiba’s jacket and yanked him closer. “Listen here, mister, you’re gonna use your dog to find those flowers - and you’re gonna find them fast. Got it?” “Y-Yeah, sure - whatever!” Kiba struggled to free himself but Ino’s nails dug into the fabric even tighter. “P-Please - you’re choking - me!” Akamaru cowered on top of his head, sinking his claws into the hoodie to keep from falling off. “I’m glad we understand each other!” Ino released Kiba and gave him a threatening smile. “Now, get to work!” 

Kiba grabbed a shaking Akamaru and set him on the ground. “It’s okay, boy. Don’t listen to her. Do you know what peonies smell like?” Akamaru whined and shook his head. “UGH! WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS!” Ino screamed, startling nearby shoppers. “You guys wait here - Sakura, make sure they don’t leave!” With that, Ino stormed off down the road and back to her flower shop. “Where’s she going?” “I don’t know,” Sakura admitted, watching the girl sprint away in a storm of dust. “Hopefully she comes back, though.”

Kakashi stood outside of the bookshop, eying the new releases displayed on the shelves. “Hm,” he sighed quietly, feeling the cool stems of the three flowers against the pads of his fingers. “I wonder how Y/N is doing. Ha. I’m sure they’re fine. They are a shinobi, after all. Ah - is that?” His eyes stopped on the cover of a pale blue book in the corner of the display bookshelf. “Is that a new Icha Icha book?!” Quickly, he ran inside the shop, not sure if he quite believed his eyes.

Panting and sweating, Ino stumbled back to the group and held up a single, solitary pink peony. “This … is … a peony … You … should … smell it … so you … can find … it.” She shoved the flower at Kiba who dangled it to Akamaru’s level. The small dog took in several hurried sniffs and yipped. “What’s that, Akamaru?” Kiba asked excitedly, pulling the flower back and tucking it into his jacket pocket. “Hey, you can’t keep that —” Akamaru barked again and took off down the road. “Come on, guys!” Kiba shouted, running after the dog. “Seriously?” Ino gasped, resting her hands on her thighs. “I just ran all the way to my shop and back, and now I gotta run again?” “Well,” Sakura said casually, “you don’t have to go. I can just find out who they’re for and tell you.” “Nice try!” Ino jumped up and glared at the girl. “You’re not going anywhere without me! They are my flowers, after all! Now let’s go before we need another tracking dog to find Kiba!” The two girls took off together, barely keeping up with Akamaru and his owner. All four followed the dog through crowds, behind a few shops, and finally down a street that seemed mostly deserted. “This doesn’t seem right,” Sakura said quietly. It was getting dark fast and the air was thick with the smells of oil and fire. “Where are we? I can’t imagine Kakashi-sensei coming down here.” “Huh?” Kiba asked, glancing over his shoulder. “What’s Kakashi-sensei got to do with this?” Ino threw a punch at Sakura and hit her in the shoulder. “I - I - I mean -! I can’t imagine a flower thief would come this way! Ha ha ha ha ha!” “Billboard Brow,” Ino hissed through clenched teeth, “you keep your fat mouth shut before you spill the beans!” “It was an accident!” she hissed back. Akamaru stopped suddenly and began sniffing the ground, turning in circles. “What is it boy? Do you smell something? Where is it? Where are the flowers?” Akamaru lifted his head and started off down another side street. “Jeez, this guy sure went a long way,” Kiba muttered. “I wonder what he wanted with flowers, anyway? A waste of money if you ask me. I guess he thought the same and that’s why he stole ‘em, right? Ha ha ha.” “Hey!” Ino growled, ready to throw another punch. “Flowers are a beautiful expression of love and appreciation! They are appropriate for any occasion and can often say more than what we ourselves are comfortable saying! And nobody asked you!” “Whatever. Huh? Look! That guy there - he has a pink flower!” “What? Where?!” both girls shouted together, shoving against each other to be the first to see. Sure enough, down the street was a man in a light blue yukata with dark hair, carrying a single peony. “That’s not —” Sakura began before stopping herself. “I mean, Ino, is that the person who stole your flowers?” Ino gave a worried look to the other genin. “Gee, I don’t know Sakura, I didn’t get a good look at his face.” “It has to be - come on, guys! Akamaru, wait up!” Kiba took off after his dog and the two girls reluctantly followed. Akamaru nipped at the heels of the man and barked wildly. The man, caught off guard, let out a surprised yelp and stepped backwards, dropping the flower on the ground. Akamaru grabbed it in his mouth and growled at the man. “H-Hey, is this your dog?” he cried when Kiba approached. “Yeah, and you’re a thief! Where are the other flowers, old man?” “Wh-What? What other flowers?” “You know what I mean!” Kiba grabbed the peony from Akamaru’s mouth and shoved it violently into the man’s face. “These flowers! You stole six of them! Give ‘em all back or else you’ll have to pay.” “P-Pay?” the man sputtered, looking terrified. “Yeah, pay what you owe to the shop! You can’t steal things, man! It’s not cool!” Proud of himself and his ninken’s work, Kiba turned to Ino and Sakura. “I caught your thief. You’re welcome.” “N-No,” Ino stuttered, looking bewildered and very embarrassed. “I - I don’t think this is him —” “What are you talking about? I caught him red-handed! He has the flowers! Or, at least, one of them. Again - where are the others?” “Listen, I don’t know what you’re talking about! I didn’t steal anything! I was given this flower!” “Huh? Given it? By who?” Sakura asked. “I don’t know. There was someone walking down the street and they offered me one. Didn’t say much - except that they had a few to spare. Said I could take it home and give it to my wife. Give it back!” He reached out and snatched the flower from Kiba’s hand. “Well,” Ino began eagerly, “who was it? What did they look like?” “I don’t know - nothing memorable. They had a yukata on, like me. I think theirs was … kinda green-ish? And they had hair lighter than mine.” “Is that all you remember?” Ino gaped in exasperation. “Well, which way did they go?” “Listen, kid, I met them about five minutes ago. They could be anywhere by now! They seemed to be in an awful rush, too. And so am I!” Turning on his heels, the man stormed away, muttering unkindly about the state of ninja these days. “Well that was a bust,” Kiba sighed, his shoulders slumping. He reached down and scratched Akamaru under the chin. “You did good, boy. You found what you were supposed to!” “Yeah, but not all of them.” Ino looked up and down the street, contemplating what to do next. “Do you think he can try again? Please? I really need to find them - even just a few of them! I can explain away one or two missing, but six? My parents are going to be so mad.” “Fine. Akamaru, do you smell anything now?” The dog sniffed around in the dirt again, trotting along down the side street. Sakura and Ino both felt a wave of relief wash over them when he started leading them back to the main street where most of the people were. They hung back a ways as they followed, making sure Kiba couldn’t hear them talk. “What do you think Kakashi-sensei’s doing, giving away the flowers?” Sakura whispered, her voice almost lost in the clamor of the upcoming busy street. “I don’t know. Is that like him?” “I’ve never really known sensei to buy anything for anyone. He’s kind of a cheapskate.” “Huh. So that means that whoever the flowers are for is really special, right?” “Yeah, I’d say so.” The pink-haired girl sighed and looked up to the darkening sky. “I’d really like to know who they’re for, too, you know. I think it’s so romantic that Kakashi-sensei has somebody he’d buy flowers for. I’d like to meet that person, whoever they are.” “I think Akamaru’s onto something,” came Kiba’s sharp tone. “Hurry up you two! It’s your flowers we’re finding!” “Okay, okay,” Ino relented, “we’re coming!”

Somehow you’d managed to pass by Kakashi again while you were wandering around the village. You’d just come back from walking around the Academy and now you were headed towards Ichiraku. You saw Kakashi strolling about, his nose deep in another book. Figures, you thought a bit bitterly, a final peony in your hands. Kakashi still had two more, though he didn’t look like he was busy getting rid of them. When you passed by, he glanced up and smiled. “Yo,” he said, throwing up a peace sign as best as he could, the two flowers dangling precariously from his palm. Without saying anything else, he walked off. That man, you grumbled as you headed off towards the ramen stand. If he’s not gonna buy me dinner until this whole thing is over, I might as well treat myself. I’m starving! I wish I’d gotten some dango while I had the chance. As you headed towards the brightly illuminated stand, you passed by a group of strangers. One was walking slower than the rest and you nearly bumped into them. “Oh, sorry!” you said quickly, looking up from your courteous bow of apology. You froze, bug-eyed, and stared at the person in front of you. They stared back, just as concerned and perplexed. “You - You - You -” they sputtered, pointing a shaking finger at you. “You have my - my face!” Oh of COURSE! Of all the people I could run into it HAD to be the civilian I transformed into! You laughed wildly, shaking your head. “W-Wow! What a wild coincidence! I’ve heard that there are seven people in the world who look like you - I never thought I’d meet one so soon! Ah ha ha! Well, I don’t want anyone thinking I have an evil twin out there! So you behave for my sake, and I’ll behave for yours. Bye!” You scurried off before they could say anything, though you could hear them trying to form a coherent thought as their friends backtracked to ask what had happened. Teuchi and Ayame greeted you warmly as you ducked under the cloth curtains and took a seat at one of the barstools. The strong aroma of grilled meats, fishcakes, and fresh veggies hung on the air, cut through with the sound of bubbling dashi and the solid thunk of a large knife slicing through food and hitting a wooden cutting board. “Good evening!” Ayame beamed, heading over towards you. “Welcome to Ichiraku! What can we get for you?” You looked over the menu tacked to the wall and cupped your chin with your thumb and index finger, your heart still racing from your exchange with the civilian. “Hmm. You know, I think I’ll go for the barbecue pork ramen - with an extra egg!” After all the ridiculous crap you’d gone through today, you certainly deserved to treat yourself. “Sure thing!” You pulled out your wallet from under the thin belt of your yukata and thumbed through the bills. Tch. I should really charge Kakashi for this. Oh well. “Oh, that’s such a pretty flower!” Ayame breathed, noticing the peony you still held. “Huh? Oh, thank you! It was a gift. I mean - uh, it is a gift.” You laughed lightly and held it up for both cooks to see. “I’ve only got one left!”

Kiba, Ino and Sakura stood outside of the bookshop, looking at the display window of new releases. Akamaru insisted that this was where the smell was coming from and he would not budge from his position beside the front door. The flowers were in the shop. “Well, we’re not getting any younger,” Kiba finally said. He pushed open the door and the others followed him inside, though rather reluctantly. There were few places to hide and spy in the store and they didn’t feel like confronting Kakashi in such a cramped place. Still, they had no choice - if Akamaru said the flowers were here, then that’s where they were. Inside the shop, they carefully studied the lady at the front counter and a few customers who were browsing the fiction section, but none of them had any flowers. Kakashi wasn’t among them. “I think your dog’s sniffer is broken,” Ino grumbled. “There’s nothing in here.” “Just give him a minute. Look - he’s onto something.” Kiba led the group towards the back of the store and around a corner. Their eyes were trained on Akamaru as he darted back and forth down the aisle and to a bookshelf. He turned and let out a soft grunt, letting Kiba know that this was where the smell was coming from. “Now I know it’s broken,” Ino griped. “There’s nobody here. Maybe he’s got some smells crossed and he’s been sniffing out something else?” “No way. Akamaru is an excellent tracker. There must be something here.” Kiba started hauling out the books and inspecting the wooden shelves. Ino and Sakura followed his lead and removed stacks of novels, checking in between pages and even seeing if someone had possible taped a flower underneath the shelves. “I can’t find anything,” Sakura said desperately as she shook one book violently. “Where else in this aisle would they be? Who hides a flower in a bookshop anyway?” “You know who,” Ino growled quietly, shooting a mean look at the other girl.    Akamaru whined when Kiba picked up a pale blue book and pawed at the boy’s leg. “I think this is it, guys!” Kiba grinned, not bothering to look at what book it was. He flipped through the pages and soon a handful of pink petals came tumbling out from the book, followed by a few torn leaves and a crushed stem.    “What?!” Ino cried, collapsing to scoop up the ruined flower. “Who did this? Why would they do this? My - My flowers!” Kiba grimaced at the sight and then turned his attention to the book, hoping maybe there’d be a clue as to who left the flower there or where the others were. His face flushed bright red and he shoved it back on the shelf. “Uh, guys - I don’t think we’re supposed to be here.” “Huh? What do you mean?” Sakura started, helping Ino clear up the mess. “This is a —” “Hey! You kids!” The three of them wheeled around to see an older man standing there, gesturing wildly at them. “You get out of there! That section is adult only! You can’t read any of those until you’re 18!” Sakura and Ino jumped up in horror and looked to the book Kiba had just reshelved. It was one of the Icha Icha books, which Sakura immediately recognized as the series her teacher read. “S-Sorry!” she stammered out, grabbing the two other ninjas by the wrist and dragging them off. “We - We just got lost! Trying to find a book our friend recommended. It’s not in there, though! Bye!” As fast as their legs would carry them, the three ran out of the shop and onto the dark street.