#and like imagine if the warden is Alistair and the hof romanced him and made the ultimate sacrifice

[gayrui]

I think it would have been rly epic if Cole had made comments about hawke and the warden contact

[tahopo]

Hi! Really in love with your art style and vibe in general. I was wondering if you have a masterpost or carrd I can read up on your ocs/worldstate? (I found you because of your Amethyne post but tbh I’m a little confused because your warden is dead? But maybe I’m getting your hofs mixed up?)

hello thanks so much :)

i don’t have anything like that but i do try to tag as best as i can.

you’re thinking of my cousland, my main hof who is sometimes dead because of the ultimate sacrifice and sometimes alive. it’s a schrödinger situation because i don’t prefer either or the other, they’re both an acceptable state for him in my mind.

kaleb dead — decided from the beginning he was going to die but only after doing his job. sensible and sympathetic choices. high alistair & morrigan approval. alistair remains a warden. refused the ritual. posthumously considered a success story, romanticised and respected. ten years later it’s revealed he had shared a bed and beget kieran. call it a moment of despair, of loneliness, a failure of character, ink pooled at the end of a straight line. or simply a terrified boy.

kaleb alive — imagine a will to live that grips you by the very last rib. this is where he begins to make rather brutal and acute decisions seemingly out of nowhere: conscripting loghain, arranging alistair with anora, accepting the ritual. post-dao he cures a blighted amethyne by Joining her. the denial of his borrowed time means he lives long enough to prove his fallibility.

then my hawke and inquisitor

mairwen — red personality mimicking her dead twin gareth’s more blue. if you think that’s creepy, that's because it is. it's also nobody's business. bethany and carver dead. was rather tender on fenris but ended it early on. killed anders. married and started a family with sebastian but allowed herself to succumb to the nightmare. many mens’ lives ruined but frankly many men hadn’t the first thing about her.

yasmin — rivaini-elf, adopted into the trevelyans. he married a fidelity spirit under (arguably) good intentions but warped it into a devotion demon; terrified by him under the guise of for him, his templar siblings conspired and deceived him into tranquility. the anchor reversed this and reunited him with devotion gradually turning into fealty as he led the inquisition. did not recruit the chargers, conscripted the mages, kept the wardens, vivienne made divine, did not drink from the well. he had a very serrated relationship with solas. no romance. reconnects with his dalish roots after trespasser.

[malvolios-yellow-stockings]

I'm getting DA:O brainworms again, but there's something so delicious about unhardened Warden Alistair growing into an unrequited (but actually kind of requited) love for (Mage) Warden who romances Morrigan and leaves him behind. Like, there's this one person who's been trying to convince you of good in this world, telling you not to grow cold, this person who was your right hand man, or, moreso you were his. This boy basically, you stumbled upon, who experienced the real world for the first time with you by his side. A man you walked Ferelden up and down with. Someone you've entrusted your life to and spilt blood for and who has done the same for you. A friend who has indulged your fancies, who reluctantly did things for you, who helped you bury a king who hadn't treated him kindly. And you've never really had feelings for anyone before him, at least like this, and you don't know what they are. And then you see him mingle with the Witch of the Wilds. See how he looks at her, trying to be cocky to impress her. See her twist this man into making decisions you're sure he'd never agree to were she not there to whisper it to him. And when you turn to the rest of your companions, they mock you and warp your concern. You are ready to give your life for this man, if it means slaying the Archdemon and ending the Blight but he speaks of some Dark Ritual. And it makes your soul grow weary and scared. And then Morrigan disappears and you finally think to yourself - this was for the best. But your friend is inconsolable. He talks of her with a fog over his eyes and a wistfulness that tugs at your chest. You try to keep him close to you but can feel him slipping away as you lose most of your contact. Maybe it's for the best. You hear of his exploits while on your missions with the Wardens. You try to keep away from him because seeing him once again makes you remember how it once was. It makes you flinch to remember his attempt at making you a king to rule beside Anora. The cold calculation of it all, his action unrecognisable to you. How much even the thought of it hurt. Maybe he hadn't been your friend? Maybe he hadn't understood you after all. But you joke about it, try to make it funny in your head. He's surely like a brother to you. Who couldn't forgive their brethren? And then you hear of his disappearance. The worst thoughts present themselves to your Taint-bitten imagination. And then you realize what he was doing. Some or other mention it, a mirror of some kind, something elven, you think, (maybe he was finding his heritage?) And then you hear it whispered. Morrigan, Flemeth's daughter. Yes, that Flemeth, they say. And you've never felt more betrayed in your life. You never got to say goodbye to him. To throw a jab one last time. And you grow bitter, because isn't it grand to finally understand that everyone leaves you in the end. You were born a royal bastard but you were an expendable means to an end and you will always be. And you abort this love and twist yourself into a leader because you know how much Thedas needs you, people like you, even though the place itself and the people around you might not. You still think of him from time to time. What became of Morrigan and him, but you forget the sound of his voice and the way he brightened your days and made you believe in something better. What remains is a dull sense of betrayal and bitterness with the man who turned on his principles and left you behind. And, Maker, it makes you twist with guilt. Get over it, you think, he has chosen a dark path.

(Mind y'all -

- I refuse to believe that the whole of Ferelden doesn't know why the HoF disappeared (when he goes with Morrigan). I just refuse to buy into it.

- I'm writing this at 2 fucking am and so working at 5% brain battery and 2% coherence and I'm not caught up on DA lore - I'm currently playing Inquisition, about 50 hours in, and have just met with Alistair again, which is what pushed me to write this drabble anyways.

- His painful and palpably disappointed dialogue about the Warden walking a dark path and the way the party reacts to his concern over the Warden being with Morrigan in Origins always kind of make me feel a pinch of what if? Alistair repressed bisexual

- Surana is my fave Warden as is apparent

- I am fully aware I am UPPING THE ANGST and I say - I want more!)

[baleclava]

I write this on twitter but I want to expand on it a bit..

I’ve been thinking about Cousland and Alistair a lot today.

Both of them are way too young omg and have them rule the country? Last year I was often struck with how I was the hof's age.. that idea makes me genuinely devastated. And now that I'm practically Alistair's age..It genuinely brings me to tears..

I love him so much and I really love my Cousland too.

You know, I made my Alistair king and had my warden be queen with him. I know it's a little bit cruel to make him king when he doesn't want to but idk. I mean I personally wanted my character to be queen when I heard that was an option, but like role playing wise I know it’s sad. I wasn’t even supposed to romance Alistair that first playthrough. I usually look up the romance options before playing any game and with dao I planned to romance Zevran first, and then I started to like Alistair, that has never happened to me before, I liked it, I liked him.

When I struggle to fall asleep I sometimes imagine what their conversation would be like, what would come up in their discussions. I write their letters in my head (maybe I should actually write some) and their conversations. I think she still feels bad about it, that and the ritual with Morrigan. I think he still thinks about it too. Yeah it was to save both their lives, their futures together. If there was any other way, I know she would have chosen that. When the warden leaves, because she does, it’s not because she misses the fighting and the adventure, but for duty. I don’t remember the exact plot of that dlc but I know she can’t wait to go back to Alistair.

After that, the warden is gone so that she can find the cure and live a long life with him, but obviously she will not have the time without him back.. I think he thinks that way too.

I know they can’t have children and maybe she wants them. I think the idea she can’t have children with him is what kills her.

I would love to replay with my Cousland but I don’t think I’ll play dao again after my current playthrough.. it’s just way too long. If there was a way to take clips with my horrible laptop, I’d definitely would..

[vigilskeep]

(1/3) Hi Harker! You know a lot about Dragon Age and its politics, so I'd be grateful if you'd help me out with the following matter: I made a non-Warden Cousland who joins my HoF during DAO events and whose personal quest is to take revenge for Howe's betrayal and crimes. She romances Alistair.

So in the Landsmeet, a visibly elf-blooded (hardened) Alistair is supported by the HoF (not Cousland) and the power-hungry Eamon but that's not enough and Fereldans are also quite racists, so I feel like Alistair is going to need marrying Anora or Cousland in order to get more votes and become the next king.

hmm okay so the breaks from canon here are visibly elf-blooded alistair and non-warden cousland. and the question is which outcome would be best for ferelden?

even as a younger child, cousland is the daughter of a teyrn. if anything happened to her brother she would have been the future second most powerful figure in ferelden, and the people raising and training her would have been aware of this. anora has the exact same background as daughter of a teyrn, and both would have been trained to govern. while anora has experience with actually ruling the whole of ferelden, cousland is from a more established family and has no associations with loghain for those who consider him a traitor. i would say cousland’s actual fitness to rule is up to you; i can’t make that judgement on your character, it depends on who she is and what she’s like! anora is characterised as a capable ruler devoted to her country, a layered character whose dedication, practicality, and skill are equally her ruthlessness, her ambition, and her determination that she alone is the right answer. i would consider looking at your HOF’s background and considering what their idea of a good ruler is, what their perspective is on how ferelden looks under anora’s rule, etc.

considering this rule is a partnership, you may want to think through whether alistair/cousland or alistair/anora would work together best. the epilogue slides claim hardened alistair and anora work well together, a “surprisingly effective pair” who both take an interest in ruling. cousland still being around while that’s happening is a weird and interesting power dynamic; i imagine anora would feel very threatened by her overall especially if they’re still in a relationship. as for alistair/cousland, how they work together and how good cousland is at the job is again up to you, but since they’re in love i’m assuming they’re a good team. as you mention, anora would be imprisoned—i actually didn’t know that, i ran through the landsmeet dialogue for this—but i have no idea how that turns out in the long run and there doesn’t seem to be any canon information on that. anora does point blank refuse to publicly abandon her claim and i think it’s unlikely rebellion would never be raised in her name. her claim is just too good of an opportunity to miss for anyone who wanted to rebel and i don’t think anora could resist the chance if offered. possibly matters could be brought to a compromise, perhaps where she settles for the teyrnir of gwaren, but that’s still a very dangerous and powerful position to leave her in. her claim and experience will always look good whenever alistair/cousland do anything wrong, and that goes doubly if alistair’s visibly elf-blooded. frankly i could see anora being executed, eventually, if compromises didn’t work out. that’s the game of challenging royal claims and it’s what she would have done to alistair; hardened alistair very much doesn’t disregard it as an eventual option in his landsmeet dialogue, either. i think all that’s true of any version of events where she isn’t queen

personally to summarise i think it would be an odd choice in this circumstances not to put alistair/cousland on the throne because the HOF knows and presumably trusts them personally, it’s a good political solution, cousland isn’t even a warden here so those problems (with the question of heirs and with warden neutrality) are removed, and they’re in love so why actively ruin it for them. but if your HOF has a very high opinion of anora, or (accurately or inaccurately) considers your cousland personally inappropriate for the throne in comparison to anora, they might be set on the other choice. the former is more obvious but the latter may be a stronger character decision

[bhaalble]

Alistair: A Defense, a Critique

I PROMISED AN ESSAY

I DELIVER AN ESSAY.

So here we go. What’s up Ferelden, its him, ya boi

So, let’s start off by clearly delineating some things that Alistair is, and more importantly, what he is not.

I think there’s a tendency with Alistair critical posts to treat the worst possible version of Alistair as the “real him”, which is more than a little unfair. Unhardened, kinda bitchy Alistair is a part of him, yes, but its a part of him that only arises when your Warden is continually a dick to him, and I think it’s fair to say that none of us are the best versions of ourselves when we’re constantly being treated like shit or ignored. Furthermore, this isn’t really something we do when we talk about the other characters. Zevran straight up tries to murder you if you don’t have his approval ratings high enough and somehow most people don’t see Zevran as inherently a backstabbing little shit.

So, let’s run down the list of common accusations and overturn them

Alistair is not stupid. He’s just…not. Morrigan jokes, yes, but Morrigan tends to see everyone as an idiot for not sharing her worldview, including your Warden. The one who jokes about Alistair being stupid more often than anyone is Alistair, but as we see time and time again, he’s rarely the most trustworthy source for his real complications.

Alistair may not be a scholar and can make some pretty boneheaded statements, yes, but he’s hardly alone in that department for the DA:O crew. His retorts show some real wit behind them at points. He can demonstrate great social awareness (e.g. catching on to the fact that the Grand Cleric sending him, an ex-templar, to interact with the Circle Mages was definitely an intentional slight). Furthermore, I’d like to point out that he managed to catch on to the Chantry’s bullshit all on his own, before he racked up dozens of counts of mage abuse (*cough* CULLEN *cough*). He still shows some effects of the templar’s training, (especially in his treatment of Jowan and Morrigan) but I’d argue that this is hardly a surprise. He’s been subjected to it 24/7 since he was a child. But he’s aware, and based on the other templars we meet throughout the game that on its own shows some serious introspection and critical thinking.

Alistair is not selfish. While he has his moments, I don’t think that’s really who he is, deep down. Take, for instance, his forgiveness of Arl Eamon. He hasn’t seen Eamon for years. The expected arc would be that he waits for Eamon to wake up, gets an apology, and then forgives him. But based on how he talks about him when you enter Redcliffe, its clear that he’s already forgiven Eamon, and is honestly more than a little ashamed of his behavior. Frankly, this is more selfless than even I would be: imagine being twelve, having lived your life as a street urchin because your adoptive father simply won’t treat you any different than he treats his paid employees, only to be sent away from the only home you’ve ever known because your presence embarrasses his wife. Frankly, I think Alistair would be justified in resenting Eamon for it, but it’s clear that he doesn’t. He calls him a good man from beginning to end.

Furthermore, I think what the Guardian says to Alistair is telling. He doesn’t just feel sad that Duncan is gone. He feels guilty. He, deep down, genuinely believes it should have been him. He wishes he could throw himself on the sword to save his mentor. Then there’s the ritual to consider. It takes some convincing (because of course it does) but with little fuss, Alistair will sleep with a woman he genuinely dislikes (which hoo boy does this make a consent conversation more than a little shaky) to conceive a child that he will never get to see. He, a bastard child cast away from his father, is essentially doing the same thing. All to ensure that he won’t risk his friends dying. Even an unhardened King Alistair casting off a non-human non-noble Warden, while it of course hurts, to me shows a sense of latent responsibility. He genuinely loves and cares about your HoF, but he has the sense that this matters more. That even though he never wanted this burden, he has to carry it as best he can.

What Alistair is is immature.

I want to draw a fine distinction here because I think we tend to use immature interchangeably with “selfish” and “stupid”, so it can sound like I’m contradicting myself. So, to explain myself: I use “immature” in the sense of a symptom, rather than a personality.

For an example of “immature as a personality”, look no further than Tony Stark in like, the first half hour of Iron Man (arguably Tony in the rest of the movies too but ashfagdkh follow me here)

Early Tony Stark is very much someone who is irrepressibly immature. He is capable of being an adult, but he chooses not to be, valuing his own desires above pretty much everyone else’s. He acts out simply because he knows no one will stop him, chases the shiniest, biggest toys he can get, and throws a fit when he doesn’t get his way. He treats other people’s time and needs with a flippant attitude, generally behaving like they are literally side characters who only matter so long as they help him get what he wants.

This isn’t to say there isn’t a reason Tony is the way he is (his relationship with his father being a big contributor), but what is important is that Tony is fully capable of being otherwise, knows it, and chooses not to. He revels in his shamelessness, believing that his immaturity is a sign of his intelligence. Everyone else acts like an adult because they have to, but Tony acts like a child because he is smart enough and rich enough to get away with it. Call it a sort of Capitalist Peter Pan syndrome.

By contrast, Alistair strikes me as immature as a symptom. First off, his age is important to factor in here. Alistair is 20 (my age, which is trippy as fuck). He is barely done being a teenager by the time you meet him.

There are further factors that have stunted Alistair’s emotional maturity, even for the average 20-year-old. He jokes about having been raised by Mabari, but its very clear there weren’t a lot of adult influences in his life at a young age. He mentions Isolde ensured that the castle wasn’t home to him long before he was sent to the Chantry. Imagine being under ten and feeling like you were unwanted by a person who has the power to make your life miserable in every imaginable way.

Then, once he was moved to the Chantry….well, if the Circle is any indication, the Chantry doesn’t exactly know how to accommodate children. Alistair made life a merry hell for the priests but it’s clear he wasn’t treated very well by them. Then straight into templar training. All of this while barely interacting with the outside world and shunned by his peers for his status as a bastard. Kids need to engage with other people in order to grow up effectively. With that in mind, it’s frankly stunning that Alistair has as much care for other people as he does.

The observation of Alistair’s immaturity is exactly groundbreaking either. Think about his dream in the Fade. We see Alistair at his most honest and vulnerable, fully convinced of the illusion. And it seems his greatest dream is to have the family he never got as a child, via his sister. Alistair behaves childlike to the point of parody in this dream. He pleads like a child and tries to entice the Warden to stay by begging his mom sister to make a special meal, his favorite. Hell, the whole “hardening” subplot is basically about the Warden forcing Alistair to let go of the childhood he never got to have and moving forward into adulthood.

His immaturity doesn’t just express itself in the obvious childlike behavior, however. Even though we tend to forget that Alistair is a junior member of the Wardens and is barely more experienced than the HoF in terms of actually fighting darkspawn, I think we can all agree that tossing the decisions on someone who’s barely past their Joining probably isn’t great behavior. Pretty much every comment he makes, about mages, blood magic, elves, even women, also read as the words of a man who simply does not have the world experience yet to really know how to engage with people who aren’t like him. It doesn’t mean these comments don’t….yanno, suck, but there is rarely any real malice behind them. Despite the hardships in Alistair’s life (of which there have been many, I grant), he has still been on the receiving end of certain privileges by virtue of being a man and being human non-mage, and it is clear he is still unlearning the prejudice inherent in that. His youth doesn’t excuse how hurtful or ignorant his comments can be, but its the unfortunate truth that, especially for those of us who grow up relatively privileged, being mindful of the Other is a learning process.

However, the main reason I view this immaturity as a symptom more than a personality is that I think Alistair has a genuine desire to grow past this. He acknowledges that he complains a lot, with an additional note that “and you haven’t been having an easy time of it either”. If you push back on his comments (or at least when the game gives you the chance to), he’ll usually apologize for it. And as I said, the hardening storyline to me indicates that Alistair is more than ready to grow up. He’s just still learning how to do it.

None of this, by the way, means that you have to love Alistair. Its more than easy to be annoyed by him, especially for a non-human and/or non-noble character. In the interest of full disclosure, it took me romancing Alistair to move past simply tolerating him. But I think its time for all of us to stop pretending Alistair is something he isn’t. He isn’t really a side character as much as he is a deuteragonist. More than any other companion (except, arguably, Morrigan), Alistair has a character arc that acts in response to your own characters. He grows and changes over the course of the narrative in a way that parallels how the story treats him, and if you create an Alistair that behaves like an asshole, well, you might want to take a look at how you’ve been treating him

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