#and life resolution too
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It's December 31, I should make reading goals but I'll be honest the only reason I read as much as I did is bc 48 hour train ride in the last week of December. I am running off sleep deprivation and too much caffeine but I don't wanna forget soooo it will be slapdash
@ramblings-of-lola if you were curious (did I miss yours going up? I'm so sorry it's been chaotic)
Death note vol 4 3/5- honestly struggling since L got offed. Like I still like it but the main dynamic I was interested in got burst and everything has been off from there. However, still overall enjoying the series and interested to see how stuff go down
The language of thorns - 5/5 grims fairy tale perfect fun times. Upon reflection I think my particular favorites were kujo, gingerbread witch, and ulla.
Illuminae- this was more of a book that belongs in an art museum than in my house. Got it for dirt cheap at a library book sale at some booktubers recommendations (idr if it was positive or not, I think it was just different and I was excited for that). And it was very different (it's told through case reports, DMs, some diary entries, so not typical story format, however everything is still informal so it's not constant space jargon) and really refreshing wouldn't reread again, do want to try similar format. I apparently don't typically read a lot of sci-fi (still working through the Amish one) so good to have something diff.
Lockwood and Co the screaming staircase 2.5/5. I didn't want to give things this rating but as much as I loved all the worldbuilding the characters being so dumb really annoyed the hell out of me, even giving allowances due to age - if they have been professionally working with ghosts extermination I feel like a lot of things should've been avoided. Debating whether I continue reading the series or not bc on the one hand I want more ghostly worldbuilding stuffs on the other hand I don't care to read more with those protagonists.
Rebecca of sunnybrook farm (reread) 2.5/5. I wanted Anne of green gables vibes but didn't bring my copy with me so I chose this on kindle cuz free and this was AOGG you have in ur fridge when ur mom says you have AOGG at home. In some ways it literally was the same vibes which is what I wanted but overall characters were less compelling and seemingly had no life outside of Rebecca which I found distressingly annoying. Also everytime I read this I find the relationship arc between Adam Ladd and Rebecca to be extremely...eh(?/bad) bc I couldn't tell if author wants ppl to ship them together romantically or not. Either way def a product of its time, not my personal choice anymore AOGG supremacy.
#brb-rambles#did i have a tag for this?#brb-books#reading goals are to read at least 12 books (always shoot low lmao) and maybe make the bingo card for this years reading resolution#and life resolution too
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you always land on all fours
#umineko#umineko spoilers#ikuko hachijo#ikukos turn for a more serious piece... the old man has reigned for too long#now. INCREDIBLY LONG INCOHERENT TAGS RANT INCOMING FAIR WARNING HAS BEEN GIVEN:#it makes me so so sad how little discussion there is about specifically ikuko because imho she fits so neatly into a lot of the more#overarching Big Themes of the game in a way that i have not ever really seen people take notice of or point out in a meaningful way#like even just off of the top of my head. the significance of names and what it means to go by a name that's Not Yours (she has like 4+)#what it Means to be a witch how it represents a person's deepest insecurities and flaws & how its at its core a coping mechanism#the fact that it takes two to create a universe and trying to do it on your own anyways has the capacity to bring you intense misery#^ (how she's shown to be extremely dismissive of her own work and skill until a collaborator comes into her life and helps/encourages her)#and even the family/patriarchy/misogyny stuff that is so prevalent in the rest of the game comes back around to her. even her Only Friend#(young&stupid atp to be fair) remarks that shes Weird for being unmarried + the little she does say about her past invites the question of#to what extent her self-image stems from her family deeming her a freak outcast & effectively disowning her while celebrating her brothers#and i have lot in my mind about the witch thing specifically because i think her particular situation is very reflective of what umineko's#entire magic system and fantasy facet as a whole is meant to represent for an individual. from what little we see of (what is presumably)#her Real personality she is shown to be deeply self conscious in a way that is JARRINGLY diametrically opposed to both 1.) what we see in#featherine and 2.) what we see when she is acting as a Public Figure. because both of the above are very much purposeful acts that she is#putting on in order to obfuscate her true self. and i have always been very resolute & adamant about not totally equating her to featherine#not only because im very firmly in the camp of “featherine is the avatar of the Pen Name & tohya is part of her too” but also very much b/c#i feel very strongly that the stark differences between the two are very centrally relevant to her character & her psyche. as is the case#with most other witches featherine's personality traits serve to reveal/magnify a lot of ikukos inner workings by playing on her#insecurities/reversing them e.g. ikuko being very quick to downplay her skill/achievements becomes featherine being the COMPLETE opposite#to the point where she barely registers even other witches as living beings rather than just fun touys. BUT even though i do champion the#ikuko/featherine separation so hard i ALSO think it is purposefully relevant that at first glance the line between them seems so blurry#her introduction implying a more nebulous separation between her reality/fantasy counterpart is i think is an intentional move on her part#like it is part of the front she is putting up when acting as the Author. as opposed to Ikuko the person who we (in a way ironically very#similar to the way that the Real Battler is presumably only shown during the boatscene) only very briefly get to see take up screentime#which even on a meta level lines up very well with her apparent underlying nature as a like. extremely private largely reserved/shy person#hit tag limit but if by some miracle anyone is still reading this thank you... please see ikuko with the love she deserves... ok ily byeee
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20 years of cave story! yippee!
#cave story#quote#curly brace#scribblins#crazy to think it's been 20 years good lord#shoutout to the game and community that literally changed my life#i've met most of my friend group through this game and i hate to think where i would've been if i hadn't#anyway i wonder if i could turn this into a print hmmm#file resolution might be too small?
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Me too, V. Me too....
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#i call this: the beautiful symbiotic relationship between me. v. and the chgartcter....#(hes a parasite. he is eating the last of my braincells in here. plz send help. plz dig this mf out.#i wanna know what its like 2 live my own life again.......)#((much like v cyberpunk....))#johnny silverhand#(((i hate him so fucking much. (no i dont.))))#the character#cyberpunk 2077#v cyberpunk#since technically hes here too#masc v#male v#meme#my art#ult art#click for better resolution#if we actually care abt that rn this is j a silly but shrug#y not
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elizabeth schuyler was a sister and a daughter. elizabeth hamilton is all that, and a revolutionary's wife, and then the wife of the secretary of the treasury, scorned.
she burns letters, and she commits his penmanship to memory. he only began to loop the H in his name after the end of the war. he used to write like a hurricane was at his heels, in his youth. every poem etched with a shard of his soul, bleeding light like cathedral glass.
she loves him, still. she doesn't think she could ever stop. but she lets him think she has, and eliza is many things, but now, above all else, she is a mother.
so she burns every letter he has written her-- burns months and years and decades-- and she rereads her life in reverse, in the light of her candle flame. she erases his past, every bit of it with love, for her children, for him.
years of her life crumble into ash beside his.
#hamilton musical#hamilton fanart#eliza schuyler#burn hamilton#elizabeth schuyler#elizabeth schuyler fanart#thinking about eliza keeping every letter alexander wrote her-- every memory from the years of her youth spent waiting for him to come back#from the war. and then burning all the memories to protect her family. and then losing philip and forgiving alexander#and then losing alexander too. sometimes i think about how when she erased his past for his sake she gave up her own too#her last song is dedicated to him the way she dedicated the rest of her life to protecting his legacy--#and she calls out his obsession with his legacy in burn. but she gave up her own legacy for his in the end.#and i don't think she cared about her legacy-- but i don't think she wouldn't have mourned the loss of those letters by the end of her life#so something something a mother's resolution something something loving someone so deeply you pick up where they left off#loving too deeply for words and so deeply that their goal becomes your torch to carry. Many thoughts#(<--- about the musical characters and the narrative the musical portrays!!!!)#hamilton fandom#hamliza#technically??? not super attached to shipping in hamilton but i do have my interests. feel free to guess LMAO (sideeyes spones)
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just finished the search for spock for the first time and I feel beyond insane. that was a romance movie. undeniably, that was a romance movie. I thought the motion picture was the romance movie but (with the exception of this simple feeling) even that paled in comparison to this. I struggle to even put it to words at the moment. wow
#seriously I couldn’t believe I was watching a canon trek film#the resolution of everything was so beautiful#kirk saying multiple times that he feels he and spock share a soul#spock and mccoy literally sharing a soul#blowing up his ship#the love of his life the enterprise#for the love of his life spock#the music was so good and pretty too#I need to lay down forever#star trek#spirk#spones#mcspirk#glimmwood text
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call buffyverse the bermuda triangle because no ship made it out of that shit alive. no marriage finale, no kids, no epilogue. the ideal ending for me where it's just a whole bunch of exes and dead exes in a world where people are constantly coming back to life. multidimensional divorce FOREVER.
#sorry i'm like one of those conservatives obsessed with a particular idea of traditional heterosexual marriage but it's for divorce#to be clear i'm not talking about real divorce just like the people obsessed with Marriage are not actually talking about real marriages#but the IDEA they think it represents#real life is largely too boring and variable to talk about in sweeping terms#but i think the IDEA that two people once in love can fall out of it. unevenly. wretchedly. for the worse. is beautiful.#me watching buffyverse: wow these people are terrible to each other not because they're 'evil' but because they're incredibly human.#hedgehog's dilemma.... just like in my animes....#no resolution!! only the Struggle of Living forever!!!#whooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo#buffyposting#btvs
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born to devote my life to academia and higher education and also born to work with small children. not really being forced to do anything i don’t want to do it just sucks that i have to choose between them
#the real answer is that i do both like i have been doing for the past years#but that uh. doesn’t pay well. so. gotta find a way to live too.#i could be an elementary school teacher but i’d be miserable not doing anything academically engaging.#i could be a college professor but i’d be miserable not working with kids.#my shitty minimum wage job is never going to be a profession that pays well cause nobody cares about childcare workers#which is. insane. children’s lives in our hands.#but y’know. i work at an after-school program. people aren’t really hype on getting us better pay.#god i love that job so much though. lets you connect with the kids better i think because your job is Not to teach them academically…#my job is to teach them still i am still a teacher. but i am teaching them conflict resolution and emotional regulation#and helping them with their homework and holding them while they cry and letting them climb all over me when i shouldn’t haha#it is parenting lite. i think. thirty kids at a time.#and i kind of want to do it for the rest of my life…#crazy. crazy. crazy. anyway#valentine notes
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HAAANK DON'T GET MAD AT SCIFI FOR NOT MAKING SENSE HAAAAANK !!! IT'S A METAPHOR FOR REAL LIFE THAT'S MEANT TO MAKE YOU ASK QUESTIONS HANK YOU DON'T NECESSARILY HAVE TO UNDERSTAND THE EXACT MECHANICS!!!! HAAAANK

#added these tags as an addition in the rbs so go in the notes if you wanna read them more easily ->#so many takes i saw abt the new dw season (almost exclusively from ppl who just started watching it) were#about the resolutions not making sense or how not understanding how the plot (esp 73 yards and the finales) was annoying#and like...i absolutely see how it can be annoying if u approach it like you would any#other media but the reason it's different is coz it's scifi... specifically the ghost of extreeeemely old scifi. foundational scifi even#a lot of criticism i keep seeing is really like. person who's never interacted with proper extreme scifi#like maybe the genre isnt for you and that's ok too... but also u can make the effort to#open your heart and accept that scifi has always been really out there concepts and#bad special effects that ultimately just say stuff abt regular life#like for example umm idk like... you dont have to take sutekh clinging to#the tardis literally. he just represents the doctor causing death. or the 73 yard woman as anything#she just represents ruby's fear that there's something deeply wrong with her that makes#everyone abandon her that she will never ever get to understand. & so on....#like you can (and should) take them at face value too ofc but they also represent things. there's layers...#scifi#doctor who#science fiction
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what do you think Danse does to keep himself busy after blind betrayal, specifically if he's living in sanctuary? I just love your takes on him a lot haha
I think Danse is very lost in any settlement but especially Sanctuary. It was the first and very close-knit at that with the small group the Sole Survivor founded it with. Each time they would invite a new companion to live there it was like adding a pillar to the community and represented what the Minute Men stood for when it came ot uniting and protecting the commonwealth as one. I am not going to say it's cliquey, in fact I feel like SoSu and Preston/Sturges would go out of their way to make newcomers feel welcome but for Danse that is very different.
He (from my playthrough experience) is one of the later companions. I ran around a lot and got a good portion of the companions and their quest before act one was done. He is also one of the few companions who openly thinks lowly of life in the commonwealth and certain citizens (if not all citizens to an extent). He did not introduce himself to Sanctuary to make friends or roots. So when he gets stuck there under the SoSu's "orders" (not letting him rot in sorrow in some random bunker) he doesn't have any comfort or companionship, in fact, I think he has more tensions and beef tbh.
I imagine the first weeks or even a month or two were rough. I don't think it is stated enough that like Danse went to that bunker intending to follow Brotherhood protocols and kill himself. SoSu may have convinced him not to in the moment but with someone like Danse, so rigid and stuck in an ideology even after it spits in his face, it's not unlikely he has a weird guilt about being alive at first. It doesn't help that I know in my heart that a few of the more petty or insensitive companions or settlers would tease him about it (playful meanness) thinking he was adjusting well (or not caring) to the Sanctuary life and coming to terms with his identity. Sometimes they go too far and it's easy to tell he's gotten back into the headspace, looking at his reflection, trying to remember concrete dates for his memories, etc..
I have this head canon that SoSu recognized this pattern as they had to have immense survivor's guilt (especially after being in Kellogs brain) about surviving the vault. They had the same idea about making things "fair" for the other vault dwellers and Shaun was the only thing between them and those thoughts for a while. For the first weeks it was a lot of SoSu monitoring him and making sure he was adjusting and not falling back into that thinking, y'know the whole "I am a disgrace and abomination against the Brotherhood and humanity. The only thing I can do to no longer sully the honor of either is to kill mys-" Like stopping that with minor distractions.
It would be a lot of small work and building projects and patrols for lost scavengers or to make sure no one is stalking the place. It's nice for him for a while, he's getting social interaction and he's not dead in the eyes of at least one Brotherhood member, especially one of as high rank as the SoSu. But it's also really unhealthy. Danse was trained and raised in a militaristic pseudo-religious faction. As much as there seemed to be casualness towards comrades there was a strict structure and order. He shoves the SoSu into that role and probably gets nick-named as their shadow during this period.
They are his only goal as he has nothing else and it shows bad. The rest of the settlement notices he trails after them and only really does his own thing when it's part of a task he was doing for, with or assigned by the Sole survivor. It's not an obsession with them specifically but he has lost his entire understanding of life and this is the one thing that stayed concrete. He does what he's asked of because following the Sole survivor has at least kept him belonging somewhere and why mess that up?
I am sure SoSu is not oblivious and is actively trying to figure out how to get Danse to start socializing and trying to actually settle into the community but for the time being Danse would treat himself like the machine he perceives himself as; Overworking himself as he believes machines don't need the same amount of rest, isolating himself and mostly trying to not have a mental breakdown every time he get into the power armor that is very much not his issued Brotherhood of Steel tech. He openly does this in respect of the General who hates it and makes everyone else uncomfortable.
this was very long just to say I think Danse just works himself to the bone all day and purposely puts thoughts in his already fragile psyche that everyone hates him and only tolerates his presence to not seem Synth-phobic and the Sole survivor's favor.
#like every companion is ready for their little one liners on the irony of danse being a synth and danse just drops#'had I been more stubborn i would've fufilled my last duty to the brotherhood and taken my life but... that's not important how may i help'#this is just him explaining why he's here or as like a personal factoid like thats not the most crazy thing to admit to someone you dont fw#Like Danse's past memories are rather isolating too and parallel too much how toxic religous sects indoctrinate vulnerable peoples and#instill their ideals which leads to blind faith. It is on Danse for fully accepting the ideals and acting on them but it still is the fact#is the ideal product of the BoS system to the point he is willing to end his own life if you fail to do so just to uphold their values. he#is like deeply troubled before and after the quest and only left worse off with zero resolution as we see hints of change but he is scared#of denouncing his beliefs because it was the only thing in his life for so long. it was his life and i feel like the settlement slowly#realizes this as they see him not knowing how to be without the brotherhood. anyway good ramble thanks#fallout#fallout 4#fo4#paladin danse#tw sui ideation#ask#anon#sorry this was long and rambly
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Started writing a fic back in early October and had to abandon it for a while due to IRL situations. But I've started working on it again little by little, and I am so excited to eventually share it with my mutuals and followers. I hope you guys enjoy it (I am trying my best to get it done)!
TBH my only motivation anymore is thinking about my friends having a good time reading it when it's finally posted (I love all of you very much). I cannot wait for all of these ideas to be fleshed-out on paper at last.
Over 16,000 words and I am nowhere near satisfied yet. I feel like I can write WAY more. Stay tuned!
#for anyone wondering the fic is dusknoir/grovyle centric but I PROMISE that I did not forget their girl Celebi#she loves them as well and they love her#but the entire thing takes place during Dusknoir's reconciliation w/ Team Wish#the doodle above is from a scene that I wrote!!#Echo and Dusknoir have lots of conversations#they are working on mending their relationship with each other#also dusknoir is holding his hands folded and out in front of him so Echo can clearly see them at all times#he knows that she's got some trauma with grabbing/touching when its w/ him specifically and he's trying VERY hard to accommodate her#in reality Echo could give a shit about him doing that for her but it's the thought that counts (she secretly appreciates it)#bonus that Sora also gets some resolution with Dusknoir too because lemme tell ya my girl NEEDS it#(scribz / fuji / zerger ) thinking about you guys each day fuels my desire to finish this damn thing so pls know that i love you#pmd eots#pmd2#my art#my fic#echo/umbreon#sora/lucario#not sure how long until this is actually posted cause my life is a horrible mess atm but I am hoping not too long!!#time to disappear back into the void because job hunting is the literal worst
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🥀: What are you doing?! 👑: Well, what do you think?
it's been AGES since i last drew them which is absolutely criminal </3 i've missed them sm
taglist (ask to be added <3): @thehollowwriter @tixdixl @scint1llat3
#twisted wonderland#twst#twst oc#twisted wonderland oc#vil schoenheit#twst oc x canon#vil schoenheit x oc#oc x canon#💌 art#🥀 rosienne#❣️thornqueen#had to fight for my life to even upload this so i hope the resolution isnt too bad sjfjdjf#anyways- still messing around with the watercolor brushes#im enjoying them a lot tbh#also gods i really need to do more stuff with those two#actually i mostly drew this so i could have Something to use in their ship intro#which im going to make uhhhhhh#well sometime soon i hope???#we will see!! probably!! hopefully!!
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Shigaraki/Tenko wanting to destroy the false sense of peace All Might and Heroes created
.⬇️.
Shigaraki/Tenko wanting to destroy everything that lead to the existence of that house, which he conceptualizes as the embodiment of rejection and injustice in the world. Be a Hero for the Villains.
.⬇️.
AFO basically literally created that house
.⬇️.
Shigaraki/Tenko helps defeat AFO
.⬇️.
Deku telling him 'you already destroyed it' is... apparently Shigaraki/Tenko having finally gotten rid of the true cause of (his) rejection and injustice? main antagonist's big problem that represents an overarching major issue of the story/in-universe society... solved? (main antagonist's big problem that represents an overarching major issue of the story/in-universe society not actually being the problem he thought it was but now also solved?)
.⬇️.
No longer a need for there to be a Hero for the Villains, Shigaraki/Tenko dies.
.⬇️.
Heroes not to be blamed in the first place. also fuck everyone else and all other 'actual' outcasts I guess.
#i understand that Tenko not having 'supposed' to be rejected doesn't mean the rejection didn't occur for the other League members#but taking that away from Tenko/Shigaraki - leader of the League of Villains - wanting to be their champion#symbolically being their collective grievances and wills condensed into one#taking that away makes the story a lot weaker#GOD what happened#nalslastworkingbraincell#honestly making everything AFO's fault#and making Tenko's main issue being his despair toward himself (created by AFO)#allowed for the (seemingly for now) clean resolution of 'get rid of the both of them' possible#It's AFO's fault? Kill him! Problem solved#Tenko's issue not actually *harm caused by other (non-AFO) people* but instead *harm caused by his self-conceptualization/his own self*?#Tenko's projecting his own self-loathing and anger onto the world and causing trouble for everyone and making his crusade meaningless?#let him die too. Pity but problem solved!#AFO gave him the specific quirk that was Decay because it was such a brutal and deadly quirk that would guarantee rejection#you cannot tell me he could've been fine after manifesting Decay if only AFO wasn't there to tell him he has an innate need to destroy#not after what we've seen of Shinsou and Toga#other 'normal' people would not have let him live a normal life#that *is* also very much a problem that should be addressed#but it was AFO who gave him Decay and Decay was also actually not naturally existing#so everything's fine! no changes for anyone!#all this could've been saved if this was transferred to AFO - AFO also seen as a victim of societal apathy#especially since he was BORN A TRASH RIVER RAT ORPHAN#but he's just a lonely guy who was too unpleasant to form real relationships#so. only real issue Hero Society ever had that needed to be addressed was civilians being too hard on Heroes#gotta love them more and demand less of them#yippee
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it's nobody's business but ours
#click for better resolution#in honor of the fact i cant see it in theatres this weekend for its anniversary :(#and also for the fact i only know how to make this ship worse and worse and worse it seems#tell me yall dont see it tho ToT#already noted some parallels between them while drawing this too#like how jack is the one to go on to become successful while ennis' life falls apart ToT#cyberpunk 2077#silverdyne#johnny silverhand#kerry eurodyne#brokeback mountain#ult art#my art#(also yall can probably guess the ref i used for this so ToT)#not the cowboy Johnny Silverhand yall wanted but the cowboy Johnny Silverhand i needed
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the thesis of mick schumacher: an abridged version
dedicated to @princemick for their day of birth
Hero’s Death by Athene Marston / Little Women (dir. Greta Gerwig) / Are You Satisfied? by MARINA / The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver / Muslim Girlhood by Leila Chattis / Sáenz by Benjamin Alire
#sources for the poetry is under the cut. i am too tired to do the rest i’m sorry#also tumblr fucked the resolution of the pictures and i hate my life#mick schumacher#web weaving#f1
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CHANGING SONIC/COMET'S VOICECLAIM AND Y'ALL KNOW EXACTLY WHO TF IT IS!!!!!!!!
#-> THE HARD KNOCK LIFE; HEADCANONS.#ignore the video quality; i was too lazy to find a higher resolution version of the show#this was such a fun video to clip and edit this show was great#chip skylark the goat
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