#and just. aughughughgughugh. i dont want to die thank god i am not suicidal
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damn depression is actually like. kicking my ass pretty hard
#i am so#sooooo#augh#everything is so much effort im not happy with anything i cant do anything that i like and just??? what am i supposed to do with my life#WHEN I CANT DO SHIT#writing in painful drawing is painful#i want to do both of those things and i just cant#i can read books in public transport and play zelda and thats pretty much it?#im kinda going insane bc i dont like my life rn at all#but i feel too weak and lazy to change anything#its like i want to rest forever because its never enough i never have enough energy#and just. aughughughgughugh. i dont want to die thank god i am not suicidal#but man i do not want to live as myself anymore right now#i guess i will write yaoi about it or something#gah i now this is my blog and all#but sorry for the constant depressing talk lately lmao#it gets better eventually
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