#and just beat the final boss a couple hours ago

[phantasieandmirare]

235 hours later, I have 100%ed Tears of the Kingdom

[world0fmadness]

MY VALKYRIE QUEEN

lando norris x voice actress! reader

♡ a look into the boss fight between lando and sigrun!

୨୧ just a little expansion adding onto the characters you’ve voiced in talk to me! this is very much based on my own experience with the sigrun boss fight lol </3

♡ related smau available here and related hc available here | view my formula 1 masterlist here

reading music recommendations: valkyries by bear mccreary - valhalla by bear mccreary

♡ as mentioned in talk to me, when you and lando officially began dating he went on a major binge play of almost all of the games you’ve had a role in!

୨୧ one of these games just so happened to be god of war… voicing the valkyrie queen, sigrun

♡ it was one of your smaller roles but also one of your absolute favourites!

୨୧ it was a role you took a couple years before you began dating lando, you absolutely LOVE the valkyrie design and think it’s one of your coolest looking characters right alongside bela dimitrescu

♡ at first, lando doesn’t want to do your boss fight…

୨୧ why would he want to kill a beautiful character that has your voice? :( but you manage to convince him to do it on stream!

♡ and when lando does get to the part where he has to fight you… oh my GOD, you whooped his ass so bad

୨୧ he had to fight all of the previous valkyrie’s to get to you and thought they were hard but manageable… yours, on the other hand…

♡ your boss fight made him want to rip his hair out one by one! the first couple of times he died weren’t so bad, he wasn’t too mad and just kept complimenting how your gorgeous your character was

୨୧ he especially likes when she’d swoop down and stomp on kratos, he doesn’t know why, it just kind of did something for him <3

♡ but as time goes on and he KEEPS dying, he begins getting more angry, the chat riling him up by constantly telling him to “ get good ”

“ kratos! just rip her wings off and kill her already, bloody hell! i’ve just died again! ” ( eventually, you come in with a drink, pulling a chair in with you to sit by him and watch his pain, sometimes reading out comments from the chat )

୨୧ you can’t help but laugh at how mad he’s getting, just an hour ago he was whining that he didn’t even want to fight your character and now he’s like a man on a mission wanting her DEAD

♡ you try giving him tips on what runic attacks to use and alway point out health stones to him, he mumbles a small “ thank you, love ” every time but doesn’t dare take his eyes off the screen

୨୧ when he finally beats her, after around 40 failed attempts, he jumps up from his seat and lets out he loudest yell… you can hear it echo through the whole apartment

“ YES! YES! BLOODY HELL, FINALLY! ” ( you immediately burst out laughing before giving him a little round of applause )

♡ he looks over at you, holding his hands out and telling you to feel how sweaty they are

“ love! feel my hands, FEEL THEM! they’re soaked, bloody hell, that’s disgusting ” ( they are indeed absolutely soaked with sweat and you make him go wash them )

୨୧ he felt SO good after beating her, he felt like he could go for a run, he felt like he could do anything… you constantly laughing at him walking in circles around the room with a fat smile on his face whilst he talks to you about how proud of himself he is

♡ but you don’t go for a run, instead you just order some takeout to celebrate <3 lando going onto youtube whilst eating and looking up people who’ve also beat sigrun, wanting to see how many tries it took other people ( he feels so proud when the people he’s watching simp for sigrun, like that’s his girlfriend, he’s basically dating sigrun and he’s so happy about it )

୨୧ one year, you actually dress up as sigrun for halloween, MUCH to the pleasure of lando who could not shut the fuck up about how amazing he thought you looked and took about two thousand pictures of you that night…

♡ but you also saw him slightly glare at the wings every now and again, seemingly getting flashbacks at how many attempts it took him to defeat her

୨୧ one thing is for certain and that is he really prays you never get a role in a souls game…

♡ when santa monica studio eventually asked you to reprise your role as sigrun in god of war ragnarök, you agreed straight away and told lando about it

“ oh love, that’s amazing! but… it’s not a boss fight again, is it? ” ( when you told him it wasn’t and sigrun was actually allying with kratos, he let out the longest sigh of relief you’ve ever heard )

୨୧ he doesn’t think he could handle another valkyrie boss fight, especially not when it has your voice mocking him

♡ don’t tell him about queen gna…

[wannaeatramyeon]

The Yakuza daughter! S/o x Gun basically made me fangirl as I imagine them being a power couple lol. I now wonder if you got part 2 in that like Goo just discover Gun ring on his hand and a photo of his fiancée/wife in his photo (I just imagine that he took a photo of s/o in a lingerie lol)

Ughhhh Sam, this idea is too fun. Here's a much much quicker follow up with a lot less Yakuza-ness (sorry 🙇🏻‍♀️).

Gun Park x Reader: After I do (feat Goo)

Goo finds out. Follow up to 'I do' fic here

"How was Japan?"

Goo watches Gun washing the blood from his hands. Something about Gun has changed. He seems... different. Goo couldn't quite put his finger on it. Maybe it was Japan. Maybe it's the guy just being a freakshow as per usual.

Gun side-eyes him. The response is clipped, short, singular.

"Fine."

"Not like you to take an extended leave."

"..."

The lack of answer doesn't deter Goo, all too used to his partner's silence. "Business or personal?"

"..."

"Anything I should worry about?"

"..."

"Are you planning anything?"

"..."

"Did you pick up my Sanrio-"

Gun thrusts his hands in the dryer, the blasts of air drowning out Goo's incessant questioning. Unfortunately, this doesn't last long enough. Nothing ever does once the blonde's curiousity is piqued.

As soon as the whirring stops, Goo opens his mouth once again and Gun finally responds. "No, no and no. Shut up."

Hmph. Looks like Goo won't get anything else from this asshole. With a glint in his eye, he asks his final question, "You owe me for covering your duties. Was Crystal always this annoying?"

Gun reluctantly smiles. "Yes."

.

.

"What does our big bad boss want?"

Gun scans his phone. The message from just moments ago wasn't anything of significance to their mission. Although. The selfie of you in a seductive pose and risque underwear might be a distraction.

He appreciates it for a beat longer then locks the device. "It's not our boss."

That's the end of that conversation. Or so he thought.

"Huh?" Goo's eyes dart over to him with increasing frequency and the car starts to swerve.

Gun will not die by his hand because this fucking maniac can't keep his eyes on the road. Begrudgingly, he elaborates, "It's personal."

The blonde's eyes bulge out at this admission, "During work hours? Who wants to text a mean bastard like you?"

For fuck's sake. Can't this fucking idiot ever mind his own business.

Goo continues, "Who the hell would even want to be friends with you? I hope you're not plotting anything against me..." A malicious snicker, "Or are you dating? You should introduce me to them, they must be a firecracker!"

Gun tunes out his partner, a skill he has long mastered.

But when his phone buzzes for the third time in as many minutes, with you no doubt sending yet another racy image, Gun has to physically restrain himself from looking (and internally curses you for your poor timing).

Goo tries to swipe at the phone. "Hey, let me text back!"

Gun moves it effortlessly out of arm's reach. "If you're not going to keep those eyes on the road, then I can just pluck them from your head."

"You're no fun." Goo pouts, narrowly missing driving into a ravine.

.

.

"Oppa~ do you want a bite of this sushi?"

"No."

"Are you sure? It's really delicious!"

"..."

"Just a little taste!"

"Come near me again, I'll jam the sushi and the chopsticks down your throat."

"Ahhh~! Goo, your friend is so mean!"

What the fuck? Gun seems to be in an even more sour mood than usual. The last time the both of them were at this Gangnam bar, Gun had no issues with the women. Someone to warm his bed for the night, he had figured.

This evening though? He didn't even bat an eyelid in their direction.

"Gun! You can at least be nice to these sweethearts!" Goo snaps.

"No." Gun replies simply, getting up to leave.

What a fucking weirdo, Goo thinks. Oh well, more sushi for me.

.

.

"Since when did you wear jewellery?"

Goo snatches Gun's left hand, pulling it up to his face and holding it so close he is cross-eyed behind his glasses.

He absolutely has not seen this before, his brows furrow at this very odd addition. A plain, silver-coloured ring wrapped around the fourth finger.

Yanking his hand back, Gun responds. "Since I want to."

"A plain ring? On that finger?" Goo trails after him as he strides off, "You know what that means right? Wait..."

Goo completely stops in his tracks, "A couple band? Engagement? Are you...?"

Gun completely ignores him, increasing the distance between them.

No fucking way, right? The simple band on his hand is definitely something, but-

There's just-

No. fucking. way.

Who the fuck would be able to put up with Gun Park?

.

.

"Who's that?" Goo peers at the picture of the smokeshow on Gun's phone, catching a glimpse just before he tucks it into his pocket.

Having that image is certainly... a choice. Who is she though? A new k-pop idol? Gun doesn't seem like the type that would have an image of an idol or a celebrity as their background.

"My wife."

"WHAT THE FUCK?"

"Focus." Gun commands, as a gang of men come at them with knives and baseball bats.

"WHAT THE FUCK?" Goo repeats, ducking to avoid a slash.

"I said, focus." Gun easily tanks a couple hits before returning some of his own.

"WHAT THE-" Goo's words are cut short as some thug takes advantage of his diverted attention and knocks his glasses off.

"FUCK- Fine." Goo elbows the guy in the solar plexus then easily plucks the baseball bat from his now slack grip. "Let me just borrow this~"

.

.

"You must be Goo Kim!"

Turning on the hostess charm, you note how Goo has to almost literally pick his jaw off the floor with your entrance.

Gun leans against the doorframe, observing with quiet smugness at the reaction. You had dropped in at the HNH offices to join Gun for lunch. Usually he would pick a better time and place but the level of questioning from Goo had already surpassed absurd levels ever since he found out Gun was married.

The last few weeks had been hell.

"When did you get married?! You didn't invite me to the wedding? I wasn't your best man? Tell me, who was it! I'll beat them up! When can I meet your bride? Or are you scared I'll charm her away?"

And Gun had promised you a partnership of equals. With your short time in South Korea, you had more than enough proved your usefulness and loyalty. It's about time he cuts you in on the Crew business.

He surmises this is a way to kill two birds with one stone.

You're Gun's wife? This absolute knockout? With him? That fucking boring asshole?

Goo would have thought this is Gun's twisted idea of a prank if he hadn't found out that the guy barely had a sense of humour a long time ago. That time had almost ended in stitches for Goo.

"Mrs. Park!" He gives you a theatrical bow, "I've been so looking forward to working with you!"

"Just call me Y/N," you giggle.

Goo takes your hand, pressing a loud smooch to the top of it. Gun's entire body tenses at the contact. This does not go unnoticed by you.

You retract your hand back, subtly wiping the kiss away, "I can't wait to get stuck into all the details."

"Of course, Y/N!"

"There won't be any trouble from you, right, Goo?"

"Princess, don't you trust me?"

You look Goo dead in the eye, seeing through the fake hurt on his face and dropping your own act.

"No. And," you grab onto his crotch, digging in your nails as Goo yelps, "If there is even a whiff of anything amiss then I'm coming after your balls." Your grip tightens as he tries without success to push you off, "Got it?"

"ACK!! Fuck! Got it, got it!"

You release him, relishing at his squeal.

"If you've broken anything," Goo scowls, struggling to stand and cradling himself tenderly. "Ugh, you two are fucking made for each other. Psychos."

Gun arrives at your side with a smirk, he guides you by the small of your back, leading you out.

"Not bad," he murmurs into your ear, "You were wasted in Japan."

[crosshairlovebot]

a tender homecoming / crosshair x gn!reader

pairing: crosshair x gn!reader (no y/n). reader has a nickname.

description: in which a tired crosshair returns home to you.

word count: 3,334

warnings: non-explicit nudity (i guess), mild sexual references. otherwise, this is just soft domestic fluff with crosshair.

seeing crosshair on mount tantiss broke my heart, and i couldn’t get the idea of crosshair loving having his hair washed out of my head either. so i wrote this <3 there are also not enough soft crosshair fics out there, so i’m on a mission to remedy that. 

also posted this on ao3. feedback is welcomed, reblogs are appreciated <3

The sun had just set on Coruscant, and a holo was playing in the background as you did the dishes, humming quietly. It had been a long day, your boss had been breathing down your neck all day, and it was nice to finally be home in your little apartment, relaxing. You’d gotten home a couple of hours ago, had a shower, made yourself dinner, poured a drink, and caught up on some of your favourite holodramas.

Spending time alone was something you’d grown used to. You enjoyed it, but it was hard to ignore the moments when you missed him.

He was gone a lot. More than he was here. For the nature of his job meant that he was off with his brothers, fighting for the Republic. It was hard not to worry about him; not to worry if he was okay, whether he was hurt. He would send short messages when he could, but if he was on a sensitive mission, you might not hear from him for days, even a week. Those were the days your heart truly ached, the loneliness harder to bear.

Those days, you would lie in bed, unable to sleep, the soft hum of speeders unable to soothe you into a slumber. Staring up at the ceiling, wondering where he was. You would toss and turn, unable to get comfortable and longing for the one thing that would fix it.

Him.

You'd get up and grab one of his blacks he’d left here from the drawer and bring it to bed. Balling it up and holding it in your arms, imagining you were holding him instead. Your nose against the soft fabric and breathing in the smoky scent that lingered there. Only then were you able to drift off and dream of him.

It was a constant feeling; the aching, the longing, the wanting. A dull throbbing in your chest that remained there, unmoving. You carried it with you always, a reminder that he wasn’t here right now.

A constant reminder that you missed him.

Laughter rang out from the holo, filling the apartment as you washed your cup. There was a knock at the door, and you frowned. You weren’t expecting anybody.

You turned the water off and placed the cup on the rack, drying your hands, skeptically.

You didn’t live in the best neighbourhood. It was relatively safe, but there was the odd mugging every so often. So you were always weary of unexpected visitors or suspicious-looking people – especially since you lived alone.

Walking quietly to the door, you pressed the blue button on the panel next to it, and the screen lit up, revealing your unexpected guest. Your heart skipped several beats as you pressed the green button, opening the door.

“Crosshair?” you were unable to hide the shock and happiness from your voice, a grin exploding on your face at the sight of him.

“Hey, ca’tra,” he greeted with a small smile before you launched yourself into his arms. He grunted as he caught you, wrapping his arms tightly around your body. To hear that endearment from his lips, night sky, after so many weeks, you felt your heart expand and ache. You buried your face into his neck, breathing him in, and the vibrations of his words thrummed against your skin. “Good to see you.”

You gently drew back, your arms still holding him. “You didn’t tell me you were coming home today.”

A ghost of a smile graced his face at the mention of this tiny apartment being his home. “I didn’t know. We were rerouted at the last minute.”

You smiled at him. It was like the galaxy knew; like the galaxy how much you were missing him and delivered him right to you. “Come inside,” you pulled away and moved to let him in. “I can’t tell you how much I missed you.”

Crosshair turned to you and smirked as you closed the door. “You don’t wanna try?”

You rolled your eyes, his familiar snark so comforting it was almost like he had never been gone. “I can show you how much later.”

Crosshair raised an eyebrow and drew your hips to his, he hummed. “Well then, I’m looking forward to that,” he squeezed your hips in his hands, a smirk playing on his lips.

“Mmhmm, I’m sure you are,” you bit back a smile as he inched his face closer to yours, his lips brushing gently against your jaw before they slowly moved to capture yours in a long-awaited kiss.

The kiss was like taking a breath after being without air, where the pain in your lungs disappears and your chest expands and fills with relief. The kiss was like warmth from a fire thawing cold skin, the heat moving through veins and bringing life back into them. The kiss was like waking up in the morning and letting your body stretch out across the sheets, waking up your limbs after sleeping for hours and they have that tingly feeling that tells you they’re awake now too.

The kiss was like returning home.

Melting into each other; there was nothing close enough, as he pulled your chest against his, his signature black and red plastoid armour pressing against you. You wrapped your arms around his neck and clutched at the grey hair at the nape of it, scratching there with your nails.

Crosshair moaned into your mouth, and you smiled before gently pulling away. You looked into those amber eyes that you’d memorised, their familiar patterns lit up with a soft kind of joy that told you without words how much he was happy to see you. Just in case you missed it in the kiss he’d just given you.

You rubbed an invisible spot on his jaw, the beginnings of stubble scratching against the pad of your thumb. “Have you eaten?”

Crosshair shook his head and moved his lips to your ear, nipping at the skin there gently. “Not yet.”

You brought your shoulder to your ear to move his attention away, his touch tickling you. “I’ll put some leftovers in the oven.” You extricated yourself from his arms. “If I had known you were coming, I would’ve cooked something nice.”

Crosshair bent and leant his forearms on the island, watching you move around the kitchen, assembling the leftovers on a tray. “I don’t need something nice, ca’tra. Just you.”

You looked at him, raising an eyebrow. “You really missed me, huh?”

Crosshair only smiled in response, the one corner of his lips quirking up as he gazed at you.

You placed the tray in the oven and walked over to him. His whole body sagged against the counter, and you could see the tiredness he’d tried to hide in his eyes. When you reached him, he stands upright and places his hands on your hips almost immediately. “You’re tired, aren’t you?” you questioned.

He shook his head. “I’m fine,” he lied. You were good at reading him now.

“You don’t have to lie to me, you know,” you looked up at him, tilting your head. Crosshair didn’t say anything, he only bent down and rested his forehead on your shoulder and drew you closer into his arms. You chuckled. “Why don’t I draw you a bath? The warm water will be nice,” you moved your hands to his hair again. “I’ll wash your hair for you.”

Crosshair groaned into your shoulder. “Kriff, that would be amazing,” he lifted his head up and meets your gaze. “Will you really?”

You smiled. “I will,” you gently push him away as the oven timer goes off, letting you both know the food is reheated. “Have your dinner and I’ll get the bath ready.”

Crosshair nodded and quickly dips down to give you one more chaste kiss before he moved over to the oven. You watched him as he grabbed his food, and swore under his breath as he pulled it out without oven mitts. You shook your head and made your way down the corridor to the bathroom attached to your bedroom.

The bath isn’t massive and is technically just a large shower bath that would barely fit Crosshair’s long legs, but it would do.

You pushed the curtain away and wipe the bath down with a wet cloth before turning on the water. Placing your fingertips in the stream, you adjust the temperature so it’s nice and warm before putting in the plug and letting it fill.

You rifle under your sink for some bath salts you splurged on and place a handful in the water, not too many, but enough to soothe his no doubt aching muscles. You then, in lieu of an actual bubble mixture, grabbed a bar of soap and held it under the stream of water so there would be some bubbles.

Just as the bath had filled and you turned off the water, Crosshair made his way in, now no longer attempting to hide his tiredness. A surprised look etched on his angular features once he saw what you had done.

“Did you eat?” you asked.

Crosshair nodded and looked at the bath longingly. You nodded at his armour. “Take that off.”

He smirked and started removing this armour. “Sir, yes, sir."

You rolled your eyes and retested the temperature of the water with your hand. Perfect.

Once Crosshair had removed his armour, he approached the bath. He removed the upper half of his blacks and placed the shirt in a pile with his armour. “Smells nice,” he remarked, his body brushing against yours in the small space.

You nodded, gaze lingering on his bare chest. It had been so long since you saw him shirtless. You studied the scars that were drawn on the skin, the small amount of grey hair nestled into his sternum; you wanted to run your hands over it, rake them over the skin. You swallowed. It wasn’t the time for that yet. “Take off your pants, the water’s getting cold.”

Crosshair arched a brow. “Somebody’s bossy tonight,” he hooked his thumbs into the waistband and then paused.

“What?”

“I don’t have the energy to remove them myself. You have to do it for me,” his lips curled into a smirk.

“Oh my god, Cross,” you laughed and shook your head and reached out to pull them down, his bare fingertips running over your collarbones.

You loved this side of Crosshair; the one that joked in this way. You so rarely saw it. You always felt special knowing he felt comfortable enough to show this side of him to you, and that it was yours and yours alone.

“Hmm, looks like you definitely missed me,” you remarked as he stood bare before you. Crosshair barked out a laugh that made his eyes crinkle at the sides, making your stomach flip over.

Crosshair stepped inside the bath, one foot at a time. He groaned as he sat down in the water, the warmth enveloping his skin. He sat back against the tub and closed his eyes. His legs were too long for the bath, but it didn’t seem to faze him – he just sat his heels on the lip of the bath.

Leaning on the sink, you watched his body completely relax, his face softening. The perpetual crease between his brow disappeared and you smiled. “Nice?”

Crosshair hummed and reached a hand out to you, the water dripping over the tiles. You pushed off the sink with your hip and took his hand, moving to the side of the tub, and sitting on the tiles next to it.

With the other hand, you grabbed a cloth and dipped it in the water before running it down his arm, down to the hand you were still holding. His head had lulled to the side, leaning against the wall as he watched you. You gently scrubbed his skin, wiping away all the remnants of his perils and missions. You felt him relax in your grip, and when you looked up, his eyes were closed. You placed his arm back in the bath and then moved onto your knees to grab his other arm, gently repeating the process.

You did this silently, just letting him bask in the feeling of just being. You knew he so rarely had time to himself, almost always in the presence of his brothers. And although he was not alone now, it was quiet. The only sound was that of the water dripping from the tap, and of you placing the cloth in the water and drawing it back out.

You heard his breathing slow and deepen. He had needed this more than he had let on.

When you whispered that were done, he cracked open his eyes and pulled his hand out of yours, and lifted it to your chin, placing a finger there wordlessly. You let him study you, his steely eyes were soft as they roamed your face.

He was being extra touchy tonight. He always touched you, but these touches were different. These were savouring touches, and you wondered what he had seen on those missions with his squad, what had made him come back and be so openly tender? You dared not ask. This was not the moment. And you would not ruin his ease.

You grabbed his hand and kissed it. “Should I wash your hair now?”

Crosshair hummed again. He seemed to have lost all of his words in his relaxation. You chuckled and grabbed the shampoo bottle before taking off your socks. You were already wearing your pyjama shorts, so you stepped into the tub. Crosshair looked up at you, blinking as if taking a second to register what it was you were doing.

“I need to sit behind you, on the edge,” you explained. Crosshair frowned in confusion as he sat forward, and you stepped so you were sitting on the small lip of the bath where his head was, your back flat against the tiles with your feet inside the water on either side of his shoulders. You cupped your hands in the water and wet his hair. “Now lean back for me,” you said, and Crosshair did as he was told.

He looked back at you, and a smile graced his face. “You could just get in with me.”

You chuckled. “Next time,” you promised before you squirted some shampoo in your palms and lathered it up. “Ready?”

When Crosshair nodded and moved his head forward, you placed your fingers on his head and started slowly moving them in circular motions, massaging his scalp as well as washing his hair. You smiled when he moaned softly, his eyes closing and his arms wrapping around your calves.

“Kriff, ca’tra, that feels so good,” he strained out.

You smiled, insides going warm. “Good, I’m glad. You deserve it.”

Crosshair shook his head, silently disagreeing with you. He’s too relaxed to argue with you. You go from circular motions to long-drawn ones, moving from the front of his hairline, down to the nape of his neck. You circle your thumbs there before you slowly circle them up. Crosshair hums as he enjoys your touches, he opens his eyes and looks up at you, a look on his face you couldn’t decipher.

“What?” you smiled.

“Nothing,” he said after a moment, then closed his eyes again and a soft smile etched on his face. Warmth bloomed in your chest for him.

After a few minutes, you pulled your hands away. Crosshair’s eyes opened and he looked back at you, so you leaned down and placed a kiss on his lips. “Okay, move forward, so I can grab some water to rinse this out.”

Crosshair sat up, no longer leaning, and you cupped your hands to grab some water, and let it fall over the back of his head, the shampoo running down his back. You repeated the action several times until all the shampoo was out.

And because you knew it would be funny, you smirked and took one last scoop of water and released it over the front of Crosshair’s head, so it ran down over his face.

He sputtered and gasped before he turned around, gripping the edge of the bath with a glare on his face. You laughed, but when he starts to smirk too, you knew you were in trouble. “Cross, no—!”

But it was too late. He grabbed your ankle and pulled you into the bath, pyjama shorts and all. You squealed as water sloshes over the sides and onto the bathroom floor. He then cupped his hands and splashed a handful of water onto your head. “Crosshair!” you gasped as you wiped your face.

Crosshair laughed, such a lovely sound it made your heart ache. He pulled you closer, moving the hair from your face. “That’s what you get,” a grin etched into his voice.

“My pyjamas are all wet now,” you pouted, pulling the wet material between your thumb and forefinger.

“Such a shame, guess you’ll have to take them off.”

You scoffed teasingly. “Oh, so that’s why you did it.”

He just shook his head. “Like I was going to have a bath without you in it with me.”

Crosshair helped you out of your pyjamas, plopping the wet garments on the floor.  You both manoeuvred so he’s resumed his previous position, but this time you were sat between his legs, your back against his chest. Crosshair grabbed the cloth you'd used on him, and he swiped it up and down your arms and your chest. You sunk into him, the comfort of his skin against yours was everything.

It was your turn to close your eyes as he drew patterns with soapy water over your arms. And then when he’d finished his painting, you traced circles on his palms as you talked about anything and everything.

You caught up on everything; telling each other things that you both already spoke about via messages but pretending it was the first time you’d heard it. He tells you about his brothers and their antics. You tell him about work and your boss who you think has a vendetta against you.

“Do you want me to take care of him? Because I can,” Crosshair said in such a serious voice as you played with his fingers that you collapsed into giggles – knowing that he was only half joking; knowing that if you asked, he would.

You both sat in content silence for a while. The water was growing cold, and you lifted your fingertips from the water, so they dripped in front of you. The sound echoed in the room. It was so peaceful, just lying here with him. To feel his solid chest behind you, to feel it move as he breathed in and out. To be caged in his limbs, his legs intertwined with yours, his fingertips dancing up and down your wet skin.

The water may be going cold, but your heart was not. Your heart was warm and full. You'd been hollow all these weeks without him, and now with him back, it was like he'd slotted back into you, completing everything and filling every crevice of you again. The emptiness was gone, consumed with Crosshair's return. You weren't sure how long he would be staying, but you were going to savour every moment of it. Every word, every touch. You'd memorise it all so you could file it away in your brain, and pull it out when he was gone again. These homecomings were precious, and you'd live in them for as long as you could.

“Crosshair?” You thought he may have fallen asleep when his hands had stilled, but he hummed in response, and you felt it vibrate against your back. You smiled. “I’m glad you’re home.”

Crosshair shifted underneath you, and his arms wrapped around your body, holding you close to him. He pressed a kiss to the crown of your head. “Me too, ca’tra. Me too.”

incase it wasn’t clear, ca’tra means night sky :’) it feels like a nickname crosshair would use, and i feel like he loves nighttime so the fact that he uses it...well, you know :’)

thank you for reading <3

taglist (please let me know if you would like to be removed/added): @32rotations @crosshairs-wife @seriowan @fives-girlfriend @starrylothcat​ @crosshairsnose​ @solitaryclone

[ratfuck]

every day. every single fucking day is just one personal travesty after another. I stuck around and refused the allure of self-destruction on others' behalf, on the words of others' that it will get better. I've stuck around and found that it was never worth it, and feel as if I am forced to stay alive for those who depend on me against my desire for rest.

Im not the same person I was years ago, and I won't be able to be that person again. I've withdrawn from my hobbies and art, the connections I've established with others have disappeared. My sense of humor has been replaced by a deep cynicism for everything around me. I have nothing to my personhood anymore

My job is pushing me to the brink. I fucking loved my career in art and design and I now just resent every amount of effort to try and change my life for the better for the past 10 years. 9 long months of struggle and pain searching for another good video job after being laid off from the "forever job" I was given last year and I end up at a place that simultaneously pays me the lowest I have ever been paid in my life while demanding the most fucking labor I have ever done. I do the work of an entire department: including digital strategist, social media manager, account manager, multimedia specialist, videographer and editor, graphic designer, and animator, and am being paid $19 an hour. I was making $32 an hour at my last job on qualifications alone just doing multimedia and video. Every week I travel hundreds of miles to single handedly film, edit, and photograph advertising content for dozens of clients. The content I deliver is outstanding and they still refuse to pay me a living wage. I am supporting 2 adults on top of myself with my peanut salary and have nothing left over to invest in the future. No amount of fucking praise from my bosses is equal to paying me what im fucking worth

What remains of my family is falling apart. My dad is medically committing suicide by refusing a heart surgery. That fucker ruined my childhood and adolescense, never supported me in my life, beat me, humiliated me, and continuously picks on and belittles me for who I am, and he's taking the easy way out and presenting his decision as a big final "fuck you" to me. My mom's health is failing, and my remaining grandparents are doing worse

My medical issue is escalating. My phantom pain syndrome fucking flares up every day now. The bleeding from my eye socket is getting worse and worse. I can see the implant bulging out and tearing through my flesh. Every time I cry, I cry actual tears of blood. My pillowsheet is stained ruined by the uncontrollable bleeding pouring out from my face at all times. I will never be able to wear a prosthetic eye again, and will be permanently scarred and forced to wear eye patches for other people's comfort. People are so fucking insensitive about it. I am so tired of the stupid pirate jokes or being told it makes me look scary.

I fucking hate being transgender, specifically I hate the experiences I have had with others who I'm supposed to feel fellowship with. I am so fucking tired of meeting trans women who present normal at first, and as soon as I show vulnerability I'm being fucking raped, I'm being used for financial gain, for housing, for drugs. Most I've met at this point have turned out to be fucking emotionally unstable sociopaths or some pathetic cretin who just wants someone to manage their fucking miserable shit life for them while they jerk and fuck whats left of it away. I have not felt this fucking alienated from any other community or identity I am part of, fucking dumbass cis people in my life have treated me with more inclusivity and respect than the trans people in my life. I still am getting stalked online by a couple of these fuckers for choosing to cease contact. I just want to fucking knife every one of them who just hits me up for pointless sex or for me to cuck them with their stupid fucking girlfriend

The miscarriage fucked me up so hard. I still think about it. Its been years. The fucking pandemic and that COVID-19 infection control job fucked me up. Seeing fucking hundreds of corpses in months and seeing them fucking getting stuffed with cotton balls soaked in antiviral chemicals and their faces sewn shut and then stacked in a fucking trailer every week isnt good. Escorting a grieving family to say goodbye to their dying kid fucking plugged up with tubes in every orafice was something that a fucking 22 year old shouldnt have been exposed to. The amount of people from the public who screamed at me and accused me of being part of some fucking NWO conspiracy and getting a fucking gun raised at me with no fucking repercussions for them. I witnessed so much fucking death and human suffering in such a short fucking time and absolutely no fucking validation for these experiences and I'm expected by family and peers to just continue on like it was a fucking hiccup. Losing the uncle that encouraged me to finish college and built me my car to COVID to cap it all off is just the final 'fuck you' from the universe, from God, for surviving through that nightmare

I know posting this is a fucking mistake, I hate revealing myself and being open about my life. I fucking have no other outlet for these feelings though. my friends don't fucking give a shit or check in on me. I have no more desire to explore myself through art. I have no hobbies or interests that are compelling enough anymore to distract me from feeling like im in constant misery. I don't want other people's pity, I want to be able to scream in anger and hate and lament at the life I am OBLIGATED to live

I know that by posting my feelings, im only inviting the vermin who waste their time encouraging me to kill myself to escalate their rhetoric, and use my vulnerabilities against me. You can't hurt me, not when I died years ago

[plasticfangtastic]

american royalty. ch. 2

A Homelander x F!reader fanfic.

a/n: will post ch. 3 this week but sadly my other fic will be posted next week, enjoy this slow burn dadlander fic, and thx u to all the readers. prev. chapter:

Sypnosis: Homelander never wanted to remember you, but after welcoming Ryan into his life, he thought of you & the lie that tore you two apart. Now... thinking back, thinking of your betrayal-- was he perhaps wrong about who the father of your unborn child was? Did you perhaps told the truth all those years ago?

Tags: mild gore, angst, lots of angst, slow burn, fluff, OC characther, child neglect, dadlander, romance.

Chapter Two

Red

It had been a very long day, business was booming nowadays and since that influencer had made a couple videos on your pizzeria, you had been more than just busy, you began to run out of ingredients.

 In the last four years, the restaurant had grown, it had been there since 2002 ran by your boss’s father and his brother, who had ran their own pizza shop since the 80’s but as the economy and other events hit, they had decided to relocate and re-brand, now managed by their son– a man you owed so much, had his heart not been filled with kindness you would most likely be in the streets. So you made sure his restaurant was the best, you had accolades, you’ve worked in some of the best restaurants, you were once a very prominent fast rising figure of the New York culinary scene– until Homelander came along.

Your talent revamped the restaurant and now your food was once again on the spotlight, for the first time since you left Vought, you were happy with yourself, even if it was pizza. Cooking made you happy, and this job needed you, you didn’t live in fear of sleeping in your car anymore, you didn’t need to worry that your daughter would sleep on somebody’s couch again, you were able to quit your third job and go casual on your second thanks to this place, right now you didn’t live in the best of places but you were saving up and in a couple months you’d have enough money saved up to move, and send your daughter to a better school, somewhere were her talents wouldn’t be wasted.

So here you were ten minutes before closing, another extra couple hours of overtime for your dream two bedroom apartment, where it would be safe for her, where you could finally feel like your life had moved on from him, that the door opened up and your cashier squealed.

It was a quaint looking restaurant, the wood seating was new and the wall decor had been changed trying to look less cluttered, with Art Deco lighting fixtures as the stand out feature. The place had been remodeled recently it seems, the kitchen and its big brick oven looked clean but ancient to Homelander, he stared at the menu board and metal boxes of accouterments by the counters, taking in that this was in fact a pizza place, that you of all people did in fact work at a pizza place. You who could whip up amazing fare, now made greasy cheap slices, but he had seen people come in and leave endlessly these past few days, people taking selfies, and recording themselves with your food, nothing he understood.

He looked back at the teenager on the counter offering his signature smile as she blubbered her script, then as you took a step closer knowing you couldn’t hide in this open kitchen you finally looked at each other for the first time in seven years.

Your throat collapsed and your whole body became prickly and tight, your heart was beating so fast you thought you might be having a heart attack, you looked at the clock cursing that it wasn’t over, you were almost done packing the kitchen and readying for tomorrow, having a customer at this hour was awful but having him here was about to take you to an early grave.

“What’s your best seller?” Homelander muttered looking straight at you with an aloof stare, then back at the cashier– is pizza night at my house, sorry for coming so late hope that’s not a problem?” he said exceedingly politely.

The teenager blushed and looked back at you as if asking you to pinch her.

“That would be our pepperoni queen– is two types of cheese, extra pepperoni, with our signature house made marinara, with a dash of vodka sauce in our sourdough thin crust… chili oil is optional” You had managed to say trying to ignore those piercing blue eyes, you moved back to your place staring at the few remaining trays of dough balls left– our second best seller is our chicken florentine pie.”

Homelander admittedly detested pizza, it was greasy, gooey and heavy, it was fattening and gross, but there was a familiar aroma in the room, something that was making his mouth water lightly. Looking back at the girl, he ordered both in their smallest size offered, he sat by one of the wooden booths for the ten minutes he was told to wait, and not once did he made a comment, maybe that’s why your heart stung so much, why it felt as if you were about to collapse– that after seven years, he had completely forgotten about you, while only now did you began to feel as if you could heal from all the suffering he’d cause you, how insignificant had you been all along, how you love never registered.

You both had talked of moving in together and buying a home, he wanted to buy you a restaurant, and you wanted to give him your life, you had never loved somebody as much as he made you love him, and now you were just some bum wearing a graphic t-shirt making him dinner.

You packed his food, your boss Kaleem had given him extras on the house, practically begging for Homelander to give them a photo for their socials and you simply stare as he did his superhero thing, you took one of the delivery bags knowing he would lose the food if he flew with them in hand.

After the photoshoot, Kaleem and your cashier had run to the back to show the picture to the only other staffer left at this hour.

You both looked at each other as he took the bag off your hands, you wanted to cry, your eyes welling up but you looked down afraid of him, no doubt he could hear your heartbeat tickling his ear.

“It's been a while hasn’t it?” 

You could’ve collapsed into tears right then and there, it was worse to be remembered.

Growing angry at the sound of his soft voice, and that concerned expression in his face.

“Yes…”

“How you been? Didn’t think I'd ever see you again.”

“Should’ve killed me back then… got fucking close to it tho.” You dropped all pleasantries, hearing him talk and not hearing the word sorry 5 seconds in, had infuriated you. His stupid face, those stupid eyes, and that clown suit was too much for you, maybe it was the poor diet and lack of sleep but right now you wanted to ban him from Lucci’s– hope you enjoy the food.”

You pushed the bag jumping from the kitchen to the front as you headed for the door, holding it open for him.

“I’m doing alright. Now leave!” 

“You don’t even want to know why I'm here?” he was taken aback by your brashness, you had always been sweet to him, tender, barely ever angry before, so why now?

“You got a little kid now, I gather like any other kid, he likes pizza… and good for him because mine is the best!”

“Not really… I actually wanted to see you. I… I just wanted to ask you something–

“Mother!!”

Your daughter emerged from the depths of the kitchen, she carried a kindle in one hand and a giftcard in the other.

“Is it okay if I use my present now? They got some books on sale and you said not to buy more books until I finished… oh…”

In the light and in front of him, your daughter truly looked like your mirror image, copy and pasted into a miniature. Her hair just past her chin, and her bangs indeed covered her eyes, peeking behind those curtains were the prettiest blue eyes he’d ever seen, there was no unnatural shine to them– just blue. Her lips so thin and her complexion just a tad paler than your own now that he gave it a proper look, she was so small-- too small for her age.

“Is okay honey, is your birthday you can get any books you want” Your tone shifted entirely lowering yourself to take her face and plant a quick peck on her cheek– now go back with uncle Kaleem and let mommy close shop, okay? We’ll go home in a minute.”

“Is it your birthday young lady? Congratulations.”

Homelander threw his best smile, giving the kid a cautious pet, catching the rage in your eyes as his gloved fingers touched your daughter.

“Thanks. Is not a milestone birthday so it is not worthy of congratulations… seems inane to celebrate it” she looked at her mother with a jaded expression– " I'll go get my bag, have a good night, sir.”

Homelander pressed his lip as the most deadpan voice came out of this little girl. Her oversized black sweater and the black tights made her look oddly unhappy, but the kid just stared at him with boredom, no surprise or interest when she stood next to America's favorite son.

He wondered if that was an adult or a seven year old for a second.

He worried if the kid had told his mother about that other night, but looking back at you he went with 'maybe'.

“What’s your name?” he asked, still forcing a smile– "my… you seem like a smart girl getting books for your birthday.”

“Helena.”

The kid couldn’t muster the energy to give him anything but her dead ass voice, she began to walk away not caring for manners, nor Homelander.

“She’s… cute.” he said watching that tiny figure walk away and surviving after her second nsult– great pronunciation for her age, does she even know what she’s saying?”

“Helena is not like other kids.”

“How so?” 

You looked at him more tired than anything, rubbing your temples as you made yourself waste spit to talk to him.

“She’s a Supe… by the time she was two she could speak in full sentences, by three she could read at a first and second grade level, and by five she was teaching herself calculus and piano… she’s a genius; I thought she was a normal genius until… her other powers manifested– none of this matters! Just go!” You shook your head in frustration.

“You gave her V?” He said while staring at Helena.

“... I didn’t know what V was until the news broke out, I thought Helena was chosen by God! That the world blessed her with those powers, but when that story came out I’ve been wanting to ask you– did you give her V? but… if you didn’t… who… are you lying to me, John?”

Homelander looked past the concrete walls looking back at that little girl, he didn’t know what to say or do, before you could utter another word he left.

Ryan nose picked the meal quickly, glad that it was friday and his dad would let him stay up ‘til late, Homelander just dropped the meal on their new table and the kid was quick on his feet, the food was still warm, only now did Homelander noticed the extras, couple of small containers holding chili oil and freshly made ranch, garlic knots and a lemon meringue pie, it was too much but Ryan hadn’t hesitated to dig in, before Homelander could ask him to wash his hands he had ripped a slice of pepperoni.

“This is so good!” He said so cheerfully– gosh I was starving, dad.”

“I sure hope so, bud… let’s leave the pie for tomorrow…” he looked grossed out, Ryan sat opening up the garlic knot’s containers– not gonna eat?”

Homelander sat down to join him, the thought of touching all those greasy surfaces was making his stomach hurl, but he relented, taking a slice. 

He was young again, and you were there coming back with some drinks as he ate your chicken florentine, this was the same recipe, the chicken was so juicy and the cheese wasn’t greasy. Ryan was shocked to see his father sound so happy as he took another bite.

It was the first time they both ate together where they felt completely comfortable with each other, maybe it was seeing Ryan not pick at his food that made Homelander able to just talk, Ryan told him all about his homework, and the videogame he was playing, he really liked Fifa at the moment even if he himself cared not for the sport.

Helena watched as her mother stood silently hovering above the sink, you hadn’t moved much for a couple of minutes, your daughter more annoyed than anything else regarding this display.

“How do you know Homelander?” she asked with a yawn.

“Huh?” you woke up from your trance– you should be in bed, darling.”

“You too. So… How do you know the clown?”

“Honey, don't say that!”

“He walks around wearing a onesie all day… like a clown… like the rest of those super clowns”

Your daughter always spoke with a creepy maturity, her voice didn’t belong to a kid.

“... He used to be my boss… he was a really bad boss…”

“You used to work for Vought?” She softened her stand.

“Honey… I don’t really want to talk about this… it's late and we are going to the museum tomorrow so you should get some sleep, mommy is just tired… hope you had a good birthday.”

“You should rest too, mother.”

Your daughter's eyes glowed momentarily turning th blinkers off before she made her way to bed, you stared at her door, thinking if she could see you.

No mother should think their child was creepy, Helena was just difficult and abrasive, to be a small kid with her brain must be unbearable. You could recall the moment she asked you about V so vividly, she looked angry, but you had no honest answer to give her, you had to lie, god knows if you got the details right about how these people committed these crimes. Helena simply had no ability to relate to people, and without the funds you couldn’t help her meet her potential, not while you were both stuck living in public housing, not while scraping every penny.

Her few friends forced her to dumb down and even they found her uneasy, only the old people seemed to handle her best, she loved to listen, and her teachers always thought of her as  a delight, yet she knew no other Supe beside herself, those pageants were expensive, and networking meetings were hard to get in, talent agencies were costly– having a super-abled kid and trying to make them into a Supe was locked behind a massive paywall, all you could hope was that her genius would let her enter a university early on scholarships.

There was always Godolkin, but god knows if they would let her enter at a young age.

It would be easy if her father was involved, if John was there in her life, she would have the world but he didn’t want her, he had made that clear years ago.

So why did he lie about the V? 

It had been two weeks since you seen Homelander, but he saw you a lot, he'd come back and forth-- watching you and the child with ardent curiosity, seeing you made him reminisce, of those many nights and afternoons, of the way no matter how tired you were, you always made sure to look happy when he showed up, the way you looked so at peace while cooking, of the feel of your skin against his and the taste of your precious lips as you kissed him good morning. 

He followed you, on your only day off as you took Helena around the city, watching you share a slice of overprice cake while taking notes, and ate cheap chinese for lunch, you waited for two hours as Helena played chess and checkers with some oldies at a chess shop, some russian man gave her lessons-- some of these people dressed nicely perhaps pros. Some won over her and some lost but the games were quick, your daughter seemed happier when she loss than when winning.

Something about that didn’t sit well with Homelander.

Somehow he found himself in your apartment, cracking open the window to sneak in while you headed back home– the tiny apartment felt more like a closet than a habitable space, the ceilign was run down, and the appliances ancient but well kept, your bedroom was simple, cooking books and boxes sat on top of your dressers, a single’s bed with plush comforters and pillows stuck against the wall, with a wardrobe in front of it, and a cheap fan tucked in the corner. He left for your daughter’s room just a few feet away divided by the bathroom were most of the clutter and laundry lived, her bedroom was just as plain, but the books didn’t seem fit for a small child, her desk tidy and organized, he picked up a notebook from the pile, seeing math equations that hurt his eyes within seconds. All her stuff were nice and new, she had a decent computer on top of her bed, an old dresser, but there was an absence of toys– compared to Ryan’s bedroom that was filled with anything he wanted and decorated expertly. A clock adorned her walls but not much else, the few things that looked messy was a tiny plastic chess set, the kind with magnets on the bottom, and some DIY stem kits.

He took to the bathroom, it was old and falling apart, mold was growing in the corner much to Homelander’s disgust, trolley held dozens of beauty stuff and shampoos and detergents, a shelf on the wall held towels and toilet rolls. Homelander looked at a sparkly hairbrush, picking a couple strands of lost hair knowing by their lengths and color that they weren’t yours, and cursing himself for doing this as he place them on small plastic bag he had hid in his glove.

[beelmons]

Luke Alvez x ADHD!Girlfriend (cw: mentions of mental disorder, light angst)

It was always fun at games with him, classic Luke Alvez. Continuously saying how cute it was how you 'obsessed' over things. Time and again teasing you lovingly whenever you would zone out during conversations. Without fail, mentioning that you would be lost without him reminding you when to eat, and that it made him feel special.

Good ol' Luke, always looking at the bright side, always breezing through life. He'd hold you through the night whenever the anxiety randomly spiked, he'd reassure you that your mental disorder didn't define you, that you were more than that, that you were enough. He loved you, he really did.

But at the end of the day, it wasn't him who had to live with that disease. It was you. He didn't have to stay up, restless, due to random insomnia. He didn't have to set a million alarms to take just one pill. He didn't beat himself up whenever he was unable to do something simple, a mundane chore, just because his brain wouldn't respond. He got to go home, do his dishes, wash his laundry, and be okay. He didn't have to live with your faulty brain. Oh, but, alas he did have to live with you.

"I work hard. I work really hard. I don't think I'm asking for a lot here." he complained regarding the tidiness of the apartment you had had to yourself for almost a week. It wasn't common for him to lose his cool, but when he did, you had to brace yourself. He would never hurt you, no, but you would feel him far away, so far away despite being in the same room, that he might as well hold a dagger to your chest. That would pain you a lot less.

It had been little over six months since the two of you moved in together. The military-style routine that he had was benefitial to you, he'd drag you along for breakfast, motivate you into a quick workout, tease you into taking your pills. It was good for you, he was good for you. Everything was okay, until he was gone, and the facade of being a functional adult crumbled to the ground.

A slow forming knot began to grow within the walls of your throat. Was this the same man who months before professed eternal devotion to you only? It was hard to tell. Perhaps, he wasn't ready. Ready to deal with someone like you. You hugged your body trying to contain your tears, yet before you were able to talk, his phone beeped. He took a look and held back a curse word at the name that appeared on the screen.

"Emily?" you asked while you read the twinkling screen, and you were well aware what that meant. He nodded, his lips pursing in anger, he stared a couple of seconds longer, and finally he decided to leave the phone face down on the table. "Come on, Luke, don't be silly, I'm sure it's important." you grunted, taking the phone and picking up right away "Hey, Em." your boyfriend's boss greeted you with confusion "He's right here." you said before giving the phone to Luke.

He looked at you with disappointment, yet he took the device and pressed it to his ear "Yeah, boss. I understand. I'll be right there." he hung up the phone after the line went dead, and he made a frustrated movement with his hand.

"It's okay." you said reassuringly "I promise, we can discuss this when you come back."

You didn't exchange 'I love you's as you usually would, instead, he just grabbed the go-bag he had recently left on the floor and left through the same door he had just entered about half an hour ago.

He didn't call you the entire trip, not even to let you know he had landed safely, and sunk in your own deprecating thoughts, you didn't bring yourself to text him either.

The case was slightly complicated, and he knew he was going to be away for a little bit, still, he didn't gather the courage to call you to let you know. At least, not until the next day, when he was standing in the local precinct, being briefed about a crime, and his smartwatch started to vibrate with an alarm.

'Pill time!' the screen read. Since you had told him your pill schedule, he had set an alam himself to remind you to take it, even when he was away; he'd always take a second to call you and double check.

"Hey, Emily, I really need to make a call, do you mind if I step out for a second?" he asked apologetically.

"Lovers quarrel?" she brillantly deducted, but Luke couldn't bring himself to answer "Go. And, Luke, I know what this job can do to relationships. If you need to go back home, let me know." she reassured and he nodded in gratitude.

He moved away to a less concurred area to dial your number. He prayed you would still be content enough to pick up, and thankfully you did. "Hey" he said as soon as the call connected.

"Hey. Is everything okay?" you asked on the other side.

"Yeah, I just..." he made a slight pause "Have you taken your pills?" he inquired and you simply responded with silence; he quickly picked up on the cue "What did you have for breakfast?" he changed the question

"Half a bagel." you answered with slight shame, aware that he was probably judging you.

It angered him, honestly, that you couldn't take care of yourself, but at the same time, he knew, he struggled to understand, but he knew sometimes you just couldn't; what was really eating him was not that you didn't, it was that he couldn't be there to do it for you. "I'm coming home." he said resolutely.

"Luke, don't. I'm sorry, I'll try harder." you said, your voice starting to sound a little broken "I don't want you to end up resenting me if something happens with your job."

"What are you talking about?" he was taken aback by your confession "I could never resent you. I said something stupid, but at the end of the day I love you, and I want you to be okay."

"Sometimes it's just hard." you sobbed into the phone.

"I get it." he tried to comfort you. "Listen, we'll talk properly when I come back, but for now I need you to do me a favor. Get off the bed, drink at least one liter of water, take your pills, and for the love of god, order something to eat, and don't go sneaking bites to roxy." he said, his voice relaxing a little, coming out as his usual careless tone.

"Alright." your breath began to calm down "Thank you for being so patient with me."

"Hey, you love me enough to put up with my job, right?" he smiled to himself as he spoke "I can love you enough to be kind to that brain of yours."

[kokofromwattpad]

Savior

Plot: A half-blooded siren had been caught by pirates and had been put on auction for the rich and affluent to get a chance to buy. Luckily, a kind-hearted noble saves the poor girl from the auction and takes them into their care. Once she had been healed up, the noble tried to release her back into the water, only for the half-siren to beg her buyer to never let her go.

Cw: Kidnapping, live trafficking, yandere half-siren x reader, yandere oc x reader, light gore.

A/N: YAYAAYA I FINALLY FINSIHED MY THIRD YANDERE

Word count : 3.6k

The ocean was much more violent than usual. The waves and currents swayed much more aggressively than a couple hours ago. The sky above the water-line was dark and shadowy, with raindrops the size of bullets falling from the thick and sad looking cloud.

The pods of ocean dwelling creatures scurried away from the layer of water that separated them from the aggressive current.

However, there was a singular exception.

Hali Mortimer.

Hali was what others called 'half-bred.' She couldn't belong to any pod since she wasn't fully bred like her younger siblings. She was the result of inter-spiecies relationship between a lustful human male and a deceived siren who fell in love with him. When the poor siren found out about his decietfulness, she cried and cried while tearing apart his body in the depths of the ocean. Hali was the embodiment of the poor siren's first love and betrayal.

So for almost her entire life, she had been neglected and forgotten by her mother and step-father in favor of loving and doting on her younger half siblings.

The lovechild was almost identical to her human parent. Same dark skin, same patch of lighter skin under her left eye, same emerald sky blue eyes. It infuriated her mother. The only thing that strayed her from her father was the large blue fish tail and her hair, that seemed to be made of condensed water.

Hali swam nearer and nearer the surface of the ocean. She had just been berated by her mother once again that day for reasons that she can't even remember. Tears were streaming down her face and floating around her, almost as if trying to mock her.

When her head came to the surface of the ocean, she was immediately beat down by the rain, almost trying to push her down back into the water. Hali resisted and quickly began to a small island she had spotted in the perfible of her left eye.

She used all of her upper arm strength to pull her heavy fishtail onto the sand of the small island. She began panting heavily from the ache in her arms from all of the strength she had just used. Hali was able to pull her heavy body away from the water and was now able to lay down on the sopping wet sand while she caught her breath. The end of her fail flicked water inconsistently as she was able to finally be left alone with her thoughts.

After what seemed to be a couple of minutes, a loudly rustling sound made Hali sit up in fright. She whipped her head around, trying to see who was watching her, but before she could get a good look, a thick, meaty hand had wrapped around her mouth, covering up her screams.

"Damn, we caught a pretty one didn't we fellas?" loudly grumbled the man. A few softer more scrawnier sounding voices agreed with the first man.

"Let's get ya to the boss lady before we do somethin' we ain't loud to do..." he continued on. Two other men came and picked Hali up underneath her armpits and her tail. Try as she might, but Hali was trapped.

Someone had come behind her with a sweat-soaked sock and stuffed it into her razor sharp teeth lined mouth.

The men carried her to a flat area of land with blue and white striped tents. There were other gruff looking men running around from tent-to-tent, doing whatever Hali didn't care enough about.

They carried her to larger than average tent. In there stood a middle-aged woman wearing a traveller-esque outfit.

"Boss lady, we found somethin' real good!" announced Garil as he dropped Hali on the hard ground.

The woman turned around to see what the gruff man was talking about. She looks down and locks eyes with the half-siren.

"She is pretty indeed. Good job Garil." Said the female leader. She had strands of sliver sliding through her black hair and deep set circles under eyes. She grabbed the girl's cheeks and pushed it side-to-side, inspecting her. "But she does have that ugly patch under eye. Hopefully she'll still sell well." She mutters softly to supposedly herself, but Hali still caught her words.

Her veins felt as if ice was flowing through it almost instantly. 'Sell'? What the hell do they mean by 'sell'?

"Let her stay under the docks until we reach the harbour. Two meals a day to keep her alive." she ordered before walking off to a different tent on the island.

Garil and the two other men came back and began hauling Hali to a large, pirate looking ship. They then threw her into the large area underneath the ship. They threw her so hard that her fin got stabbed by a stray piece of metal from the rim of a barrel.

As Hali screamed from the spike of pain through her body, blood sprayed out and had already began to pool on the wooden floor.

Shakingly, she tries bring her hands to the wound to try and stop the bleeding. She groans from the pain and achingly throws her head out and screams in pain. Tears begin to brim the edge of her eyes and start to stream down her flushed face. It felt as if she was beginning hyperventilate, as she began to huff and puff. Soon enough, her body slumped to her side and she passed out from the sheer pain.

The trapdoor that lead to the underside of the dock slammed open. Light cleared in harshly, blinding the half-siren. She covered her eyes with her tanned arm as she squinted, trying to see who was approaching her.

It was Garil.

He approached her steadily, with a thick piece of cloth in his hand. When Hali spotted it, she began flailing, but stopped once pain shot though her entire body, making her hiss loudly from the sensation. Garil ignored her and took the opportunity to stick the fabric into her razor lined mouth and hauled her, including the iron lining that was still pierced through her tail, over his shoulder, making her hiss from the pressure placed onto the wound.

She was carried out from under the dock and onto the large harbor. Sailors from who-knows-where were running from place-to-place. Hali would have found it a fascinating sight if she wasn't in the predicament she was currently in. Hali was then thrown into a wooden crate, with no food or water, and was then nailed shut, effectively trapping her in the dark.

At this point, Hali was so weak and tired, she didn't even try to escape. She couldn't even try to heal herself from the serious injury she was experiencing. She knew that if she was to pull the metal lining out, she would effectively die from either blood loss or shock.

After what felt like hours, the lid to her crate was opened, dim light flooded her eyes and a mask face greeted her. "What a beaut'. Too bad she's gonna die soon." The person said to second person in the room.

"Then fix her. We can't auction off damaged goods." Said the second voice.

Soon, two different people picked her up under her armpits and the bent side of her fishtail. Her skin had become paler than before, looking sickly. Large pieces of her skin had begun to flake off her shoulders and upper chest area.

"Bring a large water tank for her." Ordered the second voice, making their croonies run out the room to fulfill their order.

The second voice lifted Hali up on a large medical table and turned too-bright lights. She squeezed her eyes shut to protect the already damaged irises.

"This'll knock you out for a bit sweetie." Said the second voice.

They dabbed a thick piece of cloth with some kind of liquid and then placed the cloth over Hali's mouth and nose. Soon after, the half-siren fell asleep.

When she awoke, Hali found herself in a large tank of water. She whipped her head left and right, trying to quickly assess where she was, but everything was dark, making Hali begin to feel claustrophobic. Suddenly, she remembered her injury and quickly reached out to where it was supposed to be. But when she touched her tail, there was nothing but a thin scar left behind. There was no pain. Hali was understandably terrified as to what was going on. All she could remember was falling asleep with bright lights flooding her eyes and a soft, almost gentle voice coaxing her to accept them. That's all.

Abruptly, a loud voice of a man punched into her webbed ears.

"And for the last item of the night, I present to all, ladies and gentlemen, a half person from the depths of the ocean! A creature who sings melodies on the ocean rocks and lures Sailors to their inevitable doom! A half-siren!" The voice announces.

The darkness is taken away from Hali and stage lights flashed through her water tank making her spin around to see the where the source came from, only to be met with the gasping faces of thousands of oddly dressed humans, all wearing masquerade masks covering the top half of their faces.

An instant scared expression spread onto her face as she whipped her head again, from left to right.

"We shall begin her bid at 10 000 krillins!" Continued the male voice.

Instantly, screams of numbers going higher and higher slammed into Hali's ears. This was an auction. Hali used to atrend small auctions in her home, but all they sould was differently coloured shells and items found in ship wrecks.

Soon enough, a loud voice echoed through the area, screaming, "ONE MILLION!" This made everyone in the audience gasp. They turned their head to the source of the voice. It was an old fat man, who was loosing hair from the top of his head. Hali was irked and made a disgusted face, with earned a couple of giggles from the audience.

Then the auctioner's voice echoes in the now whispering audience, " We have just received a silent bet of 2 billion. Do we have anymore bets?" Immediately, the audience goes completely silent.

"Going once. Going twice. Sold to the 2 billion bet." and with that, a gavel was slammed at Hali was wheeled off the stage and was placed in a brightly lit corner.

After a few minutes, someone with a hare mask walked up to Hali's tank and pulled their mask off to get a better look at her.

"Hello there sweetie. Pleasure to see you again." greeted the person. Wait. It was the same voice as the person who healed her.

Hali sputtered, "You-" and she immediately began coughing aggressively from how unused her voice was.

"Don't worry. I'll be letting you stay with me until you're all better. Then I'm gonna let you go free." they explained.

Hali was absolutely stunned to silence. A soft flutter in her heart began. She was being let free? Really? Is this an actual dream? Holy shit!

Quickly, a wide smile spread on the girl's face from happiness. A soft grin was on her buyer's face from the sight of the happy half-siren.

"We'll be leaving soon, so try to get as much sleep as you can sweetie. It's gonna be while until you'll be able to swim freely." they explain.

Hali took in their words and nodded at their words. As soon as they walked off, Hali floated in the small water tank and closed her eyes to fall asleep as quick as she can.

When Hali finally awoke from her quickened sleep, she found herself in a large, aquarium sized tank of water. She was laying comfortably against the sand covered floor of the tank, obviously trying to replicate the ocean floor.

Hali looked up to see a large fluorescent light shining down on her tank.

"Good morning sweetie. Did you know that you sleep like a rock?" said the voice of her buyer.

Hali quickly swam towards the direction of the voice, only to be met with a nicely dressed human. They were wearing a white poet blouse and black pants and knee high black boots. The human smiled at the approaching half-siren.

"When will I be going home? I really wanna go ho-" the girl stopped when the human placed their hand up. Even Hali, who had spent her entire life in the ocean, knew that it meant to quiet down.

"I will return you home once you have fully healed from your injury." explains the human.

Hali immediately deflates from their words. But the human continues to speak, "But I will be here to continuously apply medicine to your wound. So you'll be able to leave in about two weeks."

Alright, she definitely felt better from their words. The human walked to the side of the tank and climbed up the set of stairs thst was set next to the tank.

"Come here, I'm going to take you to a more open area for you too swim." explains the human as they spread their arms out for Hali to hold on to.

The half-siren swam to the edge of the tank and stuck her head out, looking suspiciously at the human. She then reached her webbed hands out and dug her long nails into the human's shoulders. Apparently they didn't mind as they wrapped their arms around her waist and pulled her out of the tank, making water spill all over the marble flooring.

The human cautiously carried the half-siren down the set of stairs, making sure not to slip and fall. "I'm curious sweetie, what is your real name?" asked the human as they looked up at the half-siren.

She looked suspiciously at the human as the end of her fishtail flicked up in annoyance, similar to a cat's tail.

"You tell me yours first." She retorts

"[Name] [Lastname]."

"Sounds stupid."

"Alright then."

The two were silent for a while as [Name] carried them through the long, winding hallways.

Hali layed her head on the human's shoulder, starting to become a bit tired

She nuzzles her face into the crook of [Name]'s neck and shoulder.

Hali mumbled out, "I'm Hali Mortimer."

"'Scuse me?"

"Hali, it's my name."

"Pretty..." muttered the human, making Hali's face begin to feel hot to the touch. She grumbled something before placing her face back into it's original spot.

Soon enough, the pair came to open aired area, where a large pool of water sat. It had beautiful decorations lining the edges, such as boulders, greenery and rubble.

The human squat down with the half-siren in their arms and then proceeded to let her flop out of their arms and into the fresh water. Hali immediately began to swim laps around the pool, stretching out the muscles and tail she could barely use for the past several days.

The human looked fondly at the half-siren and took off their shoes to lightly splash their feet in the water. Hali noticed and quickly swam over towards [Name]'s legs. She then propped herself up on the human's thighs and rested her head on her crossed arms. The human looked down at her with a gentle smile of their face.

"Why don't you join me?" questions Hali while she dug up some old food that was stuck in between her sharp teeth.

"I don't know how to swim sweetie. Sorry..." they explained.

Hali's face morphed into something that looked like mortification. "How the hell do you not know how to swim? Shouldn't it be, like, a necessary thing to know?!" She yelled out in shock.

[Name] mearly smiled at the half-siren's enthusiasm. "Well, there was no need nor want to. I've been sickly for most of my childhood, so most of my days were spent inside my bedroom all by myself, while my parents would take my younger siblings out to balls and galas galore." They explained with a hint of nostalgia in their voice.

Hali's eyes widened. Holy shit. That sounded kinda similar to what she was going through!

"That sounds kinda similar to me. My mama doesn't really like me because my dad had lied to her about 'truly' loving her."

"But why would she blame that on you?"

"Because I look like him..."

"That's absolute bullshit sweetie. You had no choice on whether or not you wanted to be born from a liar. You're mother is most likely emotionally immature to not realise that she can't pin the blame on a person who is not to blame."

Hali was stunned. No one had ever really had a take on what her situation was. Every one of her relatives would put the blame in her whenever the topic of her mother's ex came up, as if she was to blame for her father being a liar.

Hali nuzzled her face into the human's stomach, and creating extremely loud purrs. The human smiled as they softly pet her wet hair.

Two weeks went by in a sort of haze. Everyday consisted of [Name] applying Hali's medicine on her wound, Hali talking about life under the sea, Hali swimming, [Name] giving Hali different types of human food, and Hali absolutely loving the human food.

[Name] was sitting at the pool without their shoes and socks off, which Hali found odd. They called Hali to come closer to them, and once she did, the human grabbed under Hali's armpits and hoisted her out of the water.

"Where are you taking me [Name]? Aree we going somewhere?" asked Hali as she wrapped her arms around the human's neck.

[Name] nodded with their usual smile.

"Did you forget? It's time for you to go home Hali." the human explained.

Oh.

So that's what this was about? Alright....

Hali muttered, "Oh, okay then..."

The human looked up at her in surprise. "Aren't you excited to be able to go home?"

"Not really..."

"Why not?"

"I dunno."

"..."

The pair where plunged into silence as the two exited the building where they were staying and onto the beach that right outside their doorstep.

[Name] [Lastname] was definitely rich.

The sand clung onto the human's shoes as they got closer and closer to the waterline.

There was a head sticking out of the water, obviously staring down on the pair, which Hali had noticed.

"Who is that?" whispered Hali.

"I'm not sure..."

Abruptly, the head began to scream, making the human drop Hali on the ground to try and cover their ears. Hali scrambled to go to their side and try and comfort them. The head that was in the water was definitely a siren.

Hali looked back at the water to see who was the screaming siren, when her face paled.

It was her mother.

Her mother was screaming at the top of her lungs at Hali, trying to get Hali back in the water.

Suddnely, Hali yelled at the top of her voice, "STOP FUCKING SCREAMING YOU BITCH!"

The screaming stopped immediately. Soon enough, [Name] was back on their feet and carrying Hali back into the water.

"[Namenamenamename], pleasepleaseplease don't leave me with her. I don't want to leave not after what she did to you, please let me stay with you." The half-siren begged, grappling onto the human's neck to try and slow them down.

"I can't keep you with me forever. If you don't want to live with your mother, then just live as a rogue away from her." reasoned [Name].

"No I can't, I can't fucking stand being in the water. Not when you're not with me. Please, fuck, just let me stay with you [Name]."

"I can't sweetie, it's best you stay where you are for your best chance of survival.."

The human was able to place Hali into the water before beginning to walk away from the shore line. Hali began crying, reaching out for the human, trying to grab onto their fleeting image.

"Hali, I know we haven't gotten along this whole time. But trust me when I say thet humans are no good. You shouldn't fall in love with a human Hali." explained Hali's mother with an almost gentle tone. It was almost as if she was trying to sympathise with her. With just mad the half siren even more angry.

Hali ignored her mother's words and used her arms to crawl onto the sand into the direction that the human was taking.

"Hai don't!" screamed her mother, but the half-siren persisted, she kept crawling.

A loud ripping sound echoed throughout the beach, making [Name] turn their head around into the direction of the sound. The sight that met their eyes were astonishing.

Hali's large, blue fishtail had been ripped in two. Long skinny legs emerged from the loose carcas of the now flimsy fishtail. Hali tried standing on her newly acquired legs but fell to her knees from how weak they were.

The human quickly rushed towards Hali's side, holding their arms out for the half-siren to latch on to. Hali dug her sharpened nails into the human's forearm.

"You can't leave me alone [Name]! You can't leave me! Please don't leave me [Name]!" cried Hali as large crocodile tears ran down her dark face.

She began to hiccup and shoved her head into the human's chest, making their shirt stained from her tears.

"You saved me! You can't leave me alone [Name]! You just can't! You're my savior!" she screamed.

[Name] had a concerned look on their face. "Hali.... please...." they pleaded.

Hali let out a loud sob. "No! Stop it! You can't leave me!" Hali wrapped her arms around the human's neck.

As she sobbed her heart out in the human's chest, [Name] looked down at the half-siren with a dazed look on their face.

Looks like there was almost nothing they could do.

Posted on: 20 / 09 / 2024

[cheesieblr]

The Axiom Verges

(Axioms Verge? I ‘unno. Spoilers)

This metroidvania duology is a neat little couple of games I’m happy to have happened upon. I beat the first game a few years ago and just this week beat the second one. I shall talk about both.

As I understood, Axiom Verge stood out by having some cool, non-traditional MV upgrades. No double or wall jumping, no crawling or balling, and some unconventional weapons. I liked it. My prior MVs were almost entirely Metroid and Castlevania, so the freshness was extremely welcome. Not to mention that AV’s pixel art is INCREDIBLE! I LOVE giant bio-mechanical beings and I LOVE every gross, writhing detail of their bodies. It makes me wanna puke in the best way possible— like Akira. I don’t really remember the story… but the final boss was interesting, unconventional and rather skill-less to fight.

Axiom Verge 2 was much of the same; still fun and still an enjoyable experience. Again I don’t get much of the lore, even if someone explained it to me. All I understood was that the protagonist is a dirty billionaire, but she cares for her daughter— and prevented the Murder of the Universe ;) i guess. Balancing felt good, didn’t feel like I got too OP too fast, and the exploration was really neat! I liked going into the breach as the drone a bunch; great way to discover little secrets here and there. Pixel art is amazing once again! I would say something about the bosses except there really weren’t any :\. They were more optional combat “challenges” than a true obstacle that stood in your way. I am not for that choice too often. I want a boulder in the path; a fucking steel door. Let me bash my head into it for 3 hours trying to figure out the strategy !! (only slightly exaggerating)

It was clearly left open for a third game, and I will certainly play it if/when it comes out!

[imnotjaesblog]

To my First Love, my lilac this is my silent love letter to you- Mark Lee

Over 5k words.

Suggestive, Smut, Fluff & Slight Angst. Minors do not read!

I hope you enjoy my first short story here.

It was around eight when my father finally came out the basement. He had been there since he came home from work.

“How was work?” My mom asked him. My dad remained silent focusing on undoing his tie, taking it off he picked up his fork. “Fine” he chewed his food. Keeping his eyes on his plate. This was the first time he sat at the table with us in months. “Well that’s nice” my mother tried to save the conversation, but it only became more awkward. She placed down her fork and knife looking directly at my father who kept his eyes on his plate. “My boss was a real jerk today” she began, “He made me do so much more paperwork for a mess he created. I mean can you believe it?” She said frustrated. My father shrugged “That’s great” he said with a sigh like it was painful for him to care.

“Honey, are you even listening?” She asked him. She only knew the answer but couldn’t help herself. My father remained quiet only lasting about five more minutes at the table before he picked up his food and left for the basement. Small beats of silence passed before my mother spoke. “You can leave if you want to Y/n. You don’t have to stay” she said keeping her disappointed eyes on her plate. I decided to stay and finish my meal.

How did I get so lucky with you?” She asked. I shrugged “I guess I’m a miracle baby” she chuckled eating some of her dinners. “That you are” Laying awake in my bed as the rain poured outside my window I played with the hem of my blanket. I wonder what went wrong. Between my mother and father. They used to be so in love. My father always brought my mother her favorite flower every day when he came home from work. One lilac, just one. When they first met he was too poor to buy an entire boquete, so he brought her one flower for their first date. It became their thing. He still brings her a flower every day even though he could now afford hundreds of flowers, he still gave her one. She was his first love and he was hers. I wonder where it went wrong? Now the last flower he brought her was months ago. She tried to keep it alive but it had died.

As I lay awake I hear a tap on my window, looking up I see my boyfriend Mark. Shaking my head trying to keep my smile hidden I walk over to the window. Opening it I help Mark inside helping him remove his soaked, heavy jacket. “What are you doing here?” I ask as Mark takes off his sneakers placing them next to my desk. He shakes his head like a dog removing water from its fur. He looks up into my eyes. “I wanted to see you,” he said stepping closer to me and kissing my lips. I smiled into the kiss, kissing him back and placing my arms around his neck. Pulling him closer to me, walks us further into the room his hands sliding down from my breath to my waist. “Mhm, no bra?” He questioned going back to kissing me. Slightly pushing him off me I let him sit down at my desk.

I take my place right on his lap not caring about his wet jeans. Placing my legs over his he holds onto me so I don’t fall kissing me again. “I missed you,” he said. I chuckled looking deeply into his eyes. “You saw me a couple of hours ago” he shook his head holding onto my inner thigh. His hand traveled lower, I sucked in a breath. His fingers could feel the heat where I wanted him most. He pouted kissing my lips and holding onto me tightly. “It’s not enough. You know the summer is almost over. We don’t have much time together” he whispered against my neck leaving a trail of wet kisses. My smile slowly started to fade. Pushing him off lightly I looked into his brown eyes. I spent so much time making happy memories with Mark I’d forgotten that soon I’d have to let him go.

Once summer was over Mark was leaving off to college and so was I. He would be going to Stanford and I would be going to Harvard, all the way on the other side of the country. He and I had both assumed long distance wouldn’t work so we spent the time we had now together..“Let’s not talk about that now” I begin playing with his fingers that rested on my thigh. Lifting my face towards him I smile, “Let’s make good memories, eat good food and stay healthy so that you can visit me, okay?” I smiled. Mark smiled nodding his head and leaning in closer to me.

“Okay. Let’s take care of ourselves and enjoy this moment together” he leaned in and kissed me lifting me and holding me in his arms as he made his way to my bed. Laying me down he hovered over me. Leaning into my neck he kissed his way up to my lips. His fingers trailed along my stomach which was slightly exposed due to the thin layer of material of a tank top that once covered it. The tips of his fingers tickled causing me to chuckle. Mark chuckled as well laying his hand flat this time and kissing my lips. Lowering himself further down my body I leaned up on my elbows watching as he kissed down my stomach. Sneaking a glance at me I watched as he pulled my shorts down. I lifted my butt in the air so that he could easily pull down the shorts. Tossing them to the side he pulled my panties down as well.

Spreading my legs open for Mark I wasn’t even shy. I had done this for him so many times already that my mind and body weren’t cables of being shy around him. He’s seen me at my best and worst. Spreading my folds with his cool finger I moaned when he flicked his thumb over my clit. He smirked licking his lips at the sight of my dripping cunt. Leaning forward his wet tongue began to lick my clit as his fingers dance around my entrance. “Mark” I whined growing impatient. He chuckled leaning closer to me. “I’m sorry baby I’m just trying to make good memories”he flirted. “What kind of memories? Memories of eating me out?” I asked letting my elbows set me down on my back. He smiled, “That and I need something to think about when you’re away” I rolled my eyes smiling at the corny comment. I lightly kicked him with my foot. Mark leaned in sucking on my clit causing me to moan into my hand, still, the moan was loud. Mark removed one of his hands from my thigh holding it over my mouth. “Shh,” he said against my pussy immediately going back to sucking and playing with her. Once I finished I went to suck him off.

At first, he told me no that I didn’t have to, but agreeing to palm him through his jeans he was on board. Sucking off Mark was always enjoyable. I loved watching the way his face changed when I finally touched him or when I finally placed him in my mouth. The way his head fell back at the sight of me sucking him deep into my mouth. There was something so beautiful about watching a man completely crumble underneath me or above me. Watching Mark’s chest rise up and down made me think about riding him. He tapped my shoulder letting me know he was gonna cum. Pushing me off I licked my lips taking off my tank top. Pushing back into my bed I got on top of him. “Let me ride you” I whined. He quickly nodded taking off his shirt and placing me on top of his cock. He moved me up a bit to get a hold of his dick. However, the sensation felt too good.

Both of us let out a moan, my pussy jerking off his dick as his tip hit my clit. It was delicious. “Do it again” I said. He nodded gliding me against his cock and holding onto my waist. Silently moaning again I held over my mouth to not make a sound. Mark bit his lip gliding me over his cock again. “Go faster,” I said. Mark instantly started to move my hips faster. I moved with him jerking his cock as his tip hit my clit over and over.

“Fuck” he whispered watching my pussy slide off his dick. His mouth was a gape, his jaw slacked and his eyes trained on watching my pussy glide against his dick. I couldn’t help but watch either. My eyes wandered to his face. I nearly moaned out loud at the sight. As much as I wanted to fuck him right now, It felt too good to stop this. Why didn’t we try this before? Mark jerked me against him faster as he came all over his stomach. His abs puff in and out along with his chest. Sweat glistened on his forehead and body.

Looking up at me he watched my face as he continued to move my hips helping me finish too. Once I came all over his cock he moaned watching and helping to lift me off him. His dick glistened with both our juices in the moonlight. Grabbing a towel I wiped his stomach and he laid me down on my bed and wiped me clean.

The days flew by the end of summer was coming closer than I thought. Mark was such a good distraction from the world. He made every moment together so beautiful and so perfect. We spent days going on dates and whispering little nothings to each other at night wrapped in each other's arms. As much as I didn’t want to think about it, it was going to be hard to let him go. But I have to, both our futures depend on the decisions we make now. Mark considered rejecting Stanford at one point to follow me to Harvard. I told him he was out of his mind to reject his dream school and that he should focus on living a good life. I couldn’t stop him from following his dreams.

Mark had also told me he loved me the night he found out he had gotten accepted to Stanford, I told him I loved him back. A week later I got a letter from Stanford saying I was rejected, and a few more days later I had gotten my acceptance video from Harvard. Mark is my first love. I’ve never felt this way toward anyone before. Mark has only told me how much he loved me once. Other than that he doesn’t mention his feelings to me outside of saying ‘I love you’. Sometimes I wish he did, it’s nice to hear how the person you love feels about you even if you’ve heard the story thousands of times. I know I tell Mark the story the night I realized I loved him all the time because he always ask me to tell it. I don’t mind telling him the story, it makes me happy to know he cares just as much as I do about my feelings for him. As I lay awake at night again, I hear a tapping on my window. Smiling knowing exactly who it was I made my way over to the window. Opening it up I stepped aside for him to enter. However, he remains outside my window.

“Mark, what are you doing? It’s raining again tonight, come inside” I say moving my hand over my head to stop the raindrops from hitting my eyes. He sighs stepping inside but only remaining by the window. I walk further into my room assuming he’d follow but he doesn’t. “Why are you just standing there? You know you’re free to walk around my room” I said flopping in my bed. I pick up my remote. “Do you want to watch a movie? We can watch The Notebook” I wiggle my brows. Mark smiles for a moment but quickly brushes it away. Shaking his head he stands up straight and says.

“I want to break up” Looking away from my tv I look into his eyes.

“What?” I question.

“I want to. I want to break up” he says stuttering. He plays with his fingers his eyes avoiding mine. “Look the summer is almost over and you leave for college soon. We should rip the bandage off now before it hurts later on” I scoff sitting up on my bed and placing my remote down. “Is that really what you want?” I ask. He nods keeping his eyes away from mine.

I nod, “Okay” is all I say.

“I’m sorry” is all he says.

“Don’t be,” I begin. “Mark you know how I feel about love. I love it” I say. “Many things happen to a couple while in love. One of those things is to let the other go if it means they will be happy. I love you so much that if your leaving makes you happy then I will not stand in you’re way. If you think this will make you happy and months later you’ll come back hoping I’m available I want you to know that I will not be waiting for you,” I confess. “Love is not about waiting for the person to be ready. It’s about supporting them in the healthy decisions they choose that make them happy. If you are not happy with me then, I wish you happiness somewhere else” I say opening my window for him to leave.

I silently hoped he wouldn’t, that my profession of love would somehow make him stay. Make him realize this was a mistake. I wished he’d say something to me, anything at this point. All he did was stare at his fingers playing with his thumbs. I sighed growing impatient. I know he has a million things he wants to say, I just wished he’d say them. When the silence started to become unbearable I finally spoke.

“I think it’s best now if you go,” I say slightly annoyed. Mark nods stepping outside the window. Mark lets out a shakey breath his eye falling from mine. Climbing down the tree Mark was starting to regret his decision. The truth was he never wanted to break up. He wanted things to work out, he assumed this would just be easier for both of us. However he couldn’t voice how he felt, he never could. He always got too nervous to say how he felt. Afraid of judgment or something absurd. I would never judge Mark. I didn’t even judge him when he tried to play the flute for me months ago in an attempt to recreate a scene from a movie I loved. He was horrible but I still listened to every note he attempted to hit like it was the best song I had ever heard.

He climbed down the large tree disappearing into the night. I closed my window locking it. Throwing myself into bed I held back my tears picking up my remote I pressed play on the movie. My sadness was replaced with anger. He didn’t even fight for me. He just let me walk away. Holding my pillow I still couldn’t believe it. He didn’t fight at all all he said was

“I’m sorry” that was supposed to make me feel better I rolling my eyes and trying my best to focus on the movie.

Finally, the day had come and it was time to say goodbye. My mom rolled one of two of my suitcases into the trunk of her car. Placing it inside she took mine from my hands sliding the suitcase on top of the other. I put my carry-on inside the trunk, stepping aside so my mother could close the lid. Walking over to my friends I said goodbye sitting inside the car and letting my mom drive me to the airport.

“I'm gonna miss you," she beginning to drive down the neighborhood street. "But I'm also so proud of you. I know you're going to do great things in life, please don't make the same mistakes I did" She said looking over at me, giving me a small smile then turning back to the wheel. "Was dad a mistake?" I asked feeling the air in the car shift. She sighed shaking her head, "We were young when we had you, you know that," She smiled. "I think because we became parents so soon and my focus turned to you our romance died," She said.

“So it's my fault?" I said widening my eyes and slightly hurt. My mother quickly shook her head. "No of course not. What I mean is my life turned into your life and your father's as well. You became our lilac. You are the most important and best thing to happen to us I'm sure of that. What happens between me and your father is our relationship and has absolutely nothing to do with you. I just think he wished he didn't have to grow up so fast" She said truthfully. I nodded turning my head to look out the window and sighing to myself.

Small beats of silence passed before my mom spoke.”How's Mark doing?" she asked. I rolled my eyes lifting my head off my chin. "Mom I don't want to talk about him right now,” She nodded continuing to drive. "I know. I know. I just want to know how you're doing. How are you, honey?" My mom asked slightly worry in her tone.

I sighed placing my hoodie off my head. "I'm fine. This is for the better as he said. We’re gonna be living two completely different lives anyway,” "And that was easy for you, just to leave him," she said concerned for my feelings."I didn’t leave him he left me,” I said. "But are you happy? I know you love him and it's okay if it hurts" I huffed rolling my eyes. Why can't she just drop this? "It doesn’t matter what I feel right now mom. I just want to get to school and forget all about this” I lie. She shakes her head. She can read me like the back of her hand. She knows I’m lying but doesn’t press any further. “I’m surprised you didn’t get a boom box and stand outside his window” I chuckle at the idea, it’s how I asked him to prom.

Clearing my throat I washed away the memory turning on the radio. “Ohhh looks Y/n it’s you’re singing!” My mom said trying to lighten up the mood. She started dancing to the beat. I chuckled allowing her to be my distraction until we got to the airport. 1 year later"Y/n!" my friends called out to me from across campus. I jogged over to them holding onto my bookbag. Hugging each of them I smiled at their presents, they make college life just a little more simple. My friend

Emily placed her arm around me. "Since the semester is over we were wondering what you would be doing for the holiday" She leaned closer to my ear using her eyes to point to the boy in front of me. “Maybe you could be doing Jeno,” she said wiggling her eyebrows. I pushed her off pretending like I was going to hit her. “Stop it,” I say causing her to smirk. “I heard he’s gonna be staying out in Boston. I also heard he has a thing for you" She said sipping her iced coffee.

“The worst kept secret in the world," I said smiling sneaking a glance at the boy who was already looking my way. He quickly turned his head looking up at the sky. I turned away as well. Emily squealed beside me handing me a cup of coffee. “He’s totally into you,” she said. I rolled my eyes as the group started to walk away from where we were standing and down a path. Emily stood beside me linking her arm with mine. As we walked she stopped dead in her path. “What?” I asked concerned checking to see if there was a bug or maybe one of the many lovers I had to hide her from.

“You didn’t answer my question”

“I’m not doing Jeno”

She shook her head, “No the other one”

I tapped my chin thinking of another questioned she asked me. “Well earlier who asked me if Johnny was single”

“Oh yea I did, is he?” She ask holding my arm.

I nodded my head, “Yea but I think he has a thing for Sam” I said.

She frowned in defeat. “Damn. How about TY?”

I thought about it for a moment. “He should be. I haven’t seen him with anyone”

she nodded “Nice you should set me up with him” I chuckled.

I can’t even count how many guys I’ve set her up with this past year. It’s also how we met. Last year on the first day of class she saw me sit next to our now-friend Jamal. She was very attracted to Jamal and like the secret Cupid I am I helped her out. He ended up having a girlfriend that we didn’t know about, but in the end, we ended up getting a friendship out of it so that’s even better. She stopped again.

“What now?” I question. "What are you doing for the holidays? Going back home? Staying here?" She asked. I thought about it for a moment. My mom said it would be okay if I stood in Boston if I wanted to but I already stood out in Boston last year and went to see her during spring break. That was around the same time I saw Mark at the grocery store with his brother. Nothing was ever more awkward than his brother trying to make small talk between us. However, I know it would hurt her if I didn't show "I think I'm gonna go home. I haven't seen my family in a while" My friend nodded her head understanding. "I get it. We'll miss you" she said hugging me. I pushed her off,

“Wait" she raised a brow. "What?" she asked."Why don't you guys come with me? My mom will love the company" my friend smiled a bright smile. "Really? she would be okay with that?" She asked almost slipping her drink. I nodded, "She should be. I'll call her" I said. Making my way back to my friends I went to tell them the news but before I could speak my phone dinged.

217- 588-8662- How are you?

I immediately recognized the number.

“You okay?" my friend asked as I stared at my phone. Lifting my head I nodded. "I'm fine" shutting off my phone I caught up with my friends. Three days later. My mom opened the door with wide arms and a big smile for me and my friends. Wearing an apron and gloves she welcomed us all in. She hugged me and my friend group. "It's so nice to meet you all. Are you all hungry?" she asked. “Yes!" they responded in unison. She smiled seating everyone at the dining table.

I walked over joining my friends. Jeno helped me place everyone’s suitcase in different rooms in the house. He placed the guys downstairs in the basement and helped me carry the girl's suitcases to my bedroom. As we brought the last bag up I slipped. 

Jeno quick on his feet helped me up off the wooden step I fell on. “Are you okay?” He asked holding out his hand for me to take. I chuckled letting him help me up. “I’m fine” I respond. He pulls me up a little hard causing me to bump into his hard chest. Holding me close we both stare into each other eyes. Just as he was about to speak the doorbell rings. I pushed him off me and ran downstairs. My mom went to open the front door but I stopped her from opening it myself. Walking over to the door I opened it revealing, "Mark?" I said both our eyes widened. "What are you doing here?" I asked.

He cleared his throat. "Your mom invited me," he said keeping his eyes locked on mine. I couldn't believe it. Why would she invite him here knowing I was coming? As time went by I remained at the front door holding it open in surprise. My mom came to the door allowing Mark to step inside. "Go ahead and sit down make yourself comfortable," she said to him.

"Are you sure?" he asked, "I don't want things to be weird" he says politely.

“They already are," I say under my breath. My mom nudged me, "Stop it" she turned back to Mark, "It's not weird. Go sit down make yourself comfortable" Mark nodded walking inside and sitting down at the table."Mom why?" I asked.

She sighed. "He's going through a lot right now okay"

"So you invite him here to our house while I'm here! He's my ex! Why would you invite him? And what does that have to do with me!” I whisper yell. She huffs turning us around so we could face the front door. "Look I didn't want to air out his business but you need context. His dad lost his job so they can't afford tuition. He's going to a community college out here for now and he's been helping your dad in the basement with that old car" She sighed. "His parents are fighting a lot so sometimes I invite him over for dinner, I had already invited him for Christmas before I knew you were coming. Besides," she flicked my forehead.

“Ow!" I whined.

“You were supposed to come tomorrow," She said. I rubbed my forehead, "I'm sorry they changed our flight" I said. "Be nice" She whispered into my ear walking away. She sat back down at the table. I followed behind her making my way into the kitchen to grab a glass of water.

"Wow, this table hasn't been filled with people in years. I'm so happy Y/n invited you all for the holidays, truly. I hope you enjoy you're staying here" she said smiling I could hear the excitement in her voice watching everyone enjoy their meals. Maybe it's good Mark comes over for dinner when I'm not here, she can probably use the company. I sigh to myself sipping my water. I had no idea he dropped out of Standford.

Looking over at the dining table my eyes found Mark sitting next to Johnny. The two were talking to one another as more of my friends joined in. He fit in so well with our group, looking at him at the table felt right. Maybe he needed this, maybe he needed friends. Maybe I should be nicer to him, who knows what he's going through. Walking back to the table Jaemin spoke up, "If you keep cooking like this, I won't ever leave" he said to my mom who blushed. We all chuckled at his comment.

I sat back down at the table across from Mark, we awkwardly shared a glance before I turned to the rest of the table trying to figure out what part of the story Sam was telling. Throughout the story, I could see through the corner of my eye the glances Mark made toward me. Brushing them off I focused on the conversation."Woah I love your room," My friend Emily said walking inside and touching the lights that dangled on my wall. Jaemin walked over to my bed picking up a brown bear.

“Aww," he said holding it up. "Who is this?" he asked holding the bear. I walked over took it from his hands placing it on my bed. "It's my mom's. My dad gave it to her back in the 90s when they went to some amusement park. It was the only prize he won her. Well, he paid the guy to give it to him but my mom doesn't know that" We both chuckled at the short but cute story. Turning away I watched as Emily entered followed by our friend group, Mark stood by the door. As they walked inside my friends looked at my pictures and artwork on my wall. Jeno chuckled seeing a baby photo of me on my dresser. Walking over to him I blushed slightly embarrassed he found such a young photo of me, then again it was on my dresser where everyone could see so I can't be too shocked by the discovery.

"You look so young," he says holding the frame. "You look so cute," He said smiling at the photo. I smiled at him looking down at the photo. "You think I'm cute?" I flirted. He lifted his head looking into my eyes, "I do" he said his eyes looking into mine then turning to pick up another photo. My eyes traveled beyond the photo in his hands to the other side of the room.

I watched as my friend Sam placed her hand on Mark's shoulder. He jumped caught off guard by the closeness. She flipped her hair back and laughed at something he said. His chest erupted in small chuckles as the two flirted standing at the front of my door. "Why don't you come inside?" she asked. Such an innocent question, but for Sam it had a double meaning. Sam wasn't one to strive away from a casual hookup, but she had a type and was a lot pickier than Emily. The only thing Emily wanted was someone clean and attractive, age didn't matter unless they were under eighteen. She didn't need to get to know you or go out on a date, if you were down she was down.

Unlike Sam who liked guys like Mark. She liked to mess with them and tease them just to watch them fall apart. Sam was the kind of girl who got you in trouble, who you'd fall in love with and she'd break you're heart because she wasn't ready for love. It's why she always refuses Johnny. However I couldn't get mad at Sam for being so touchy with Mark, she didn't know he was my ex. I had enough trust to know that if she did she would have left him alone.

Mark's eyes made their way to mine. I quickly turned around facing Jeno again talking about the baby photo. Jeno continued to talk about how cute I looked as a baby and I answered his questions with one-word responses. I couldn't help but look back at Mark and Samantha. My face started to heat up and an annoyed feeling floated around in my stomach. Why was I so bothered? Mark and I broke up a year ago, I should be flirting with Jeno or even Jaemin. Why was my mind so occupied with Mark? Maybe it's because I haven't seen him in a while and all those feelings I hid away were slowly starting to rise.

Later that night."Okay Y/n," Emily said walking over to me and sitting down beside me on my rug. "Sam just went into the shower" I nodded my head confused. "Uh okay? Why are you telling me this?" She stared blankly at me like I was supposed to know why. She huffed after I didn't speak for a couple of seconds. “What's up with the Mark guy? You've been staring at him all night" she said crossing her arms over her chest. "Do you like him?" she raised her brow smirking. I scoffed, "I thought you wanted me with Jeno?" She rolled her eyes letting her arms fall. "I want you with whoever makes you happy. So who's the Mark guy?" she asked again.

I sighed telling her. "He's my ex. We broke up before we started school" I confessed. She leaned back nodding her head. "Now it makes sense, why he stood outside you're room," She said. "You still like him?" she asked. I widened my eyes shaking my head answering rather quickly, "No!" I said nervously. "I don't" she lightly kicked me with her foot. "Ow!" You do like him!" she said. "You better hurry up and get him" Why?" I asked. "Because Sam has been after him the whole night" I shrugged turning away. "So? he's my ex. Besides Jeno is right downstairs. I could go see him if I wanted to" I said trying to hide my irritation.

She rolled her eyes, "First off we both know you don't like him, and second of all If you go downstairs to see Jeno, you'll see Mark" I widened my eyes turning to face her again. "He's here?!" she nodded why does everyone know what's happening in this house except for me? "You're mom let him stay. The boys have taken a liking to him, so I'm sure they're hanging out" I got up off the rug putting on my slippers.

I walked towards my door grabbing the knob. "Where are you going?" Emily asked sarcastically already chuckling. "The basement" I responded my back still turned, opening the door. "You better hurry the water just turned off!" she shouted laughing as she heard me pick up my pace.

“That's my girl" she whispered to herself proud she was somehow able to convince me to go to the basement. I opened the basement door hearing laughter from the couch. Walking down the stairs all the boys turned their attention to me. "Hey Y/n," my friend Jamal said. "Do you want to join us?" I shook my head. "No, I need to speak to Mark," The two boys Oooed except for Mark and Jeno. Mark stood up walking over to me. We walked up the stairs leading him to the back door I stepped outside and he followed."Look if you want me to leave I will, you don't have to embarrass me-" he began to say. I shook my head.

“I'm not trying to embarrass you. I'm just curious as to why you're here" I said folding my arms over my chest. He sighed, " I don't want to talk about it right now," he said turning his head away and looking towards the ground. I sighed cold air leaving my lips, classic. We stood in silence for amount before Mark walked towards me. He took off his hoodie stepping closer to me. I stepped back, "What are you doing?" I asked. He handed me the hoodie exposing his arms. "It's freezing out here," He said holding his green hoodie out. "Put this on" I hesitantly took it from his hands deciding not to debate with him. Pulling the hoodie over my head we both stood again awkwardly.

Small beats of silence passed before Mark spoke again. “I think that Jeno guy likes you," Mark said to make conversation. I chuckled. "You and everyone else" I kicked my foot in the snow. He looked at me, and my eyes wandered every else but to his, watching the snow fall on the grass. Mark's eyes stood in the same spot they are now. "If you know he likes you then why not give him a chance?" he asked. Because I don't like him the way I like you I say in my head. Instead of saying the truth I shrug, "He's not my type," I say.

Mark steps closer tilting his head to the side his eyes never leaving me. "Oh, yea? What is your type" he says coming increasingly closer. I quickly glance at him slightly panicking with how close he was getting to me. I step back slowly tripping over my own feet. I reach out to the railing slightly turning my body away from him.

I shrug again, "I don't know, not him"Mark chuckles standing beside me. "Are you warm?" he says lower so only my ears can hear. I nod feeling his breath on my neck causing the little hairs to rise. "Are you cold?" I ask seeing him still in a t-shirt and jeans. He shakes his head, "I'm okay, I'm just making sure you are" he lied. I slowly start to turn my head looking into his eyes. Mark's lips are inches away from mine. He lets out a breath, I don't even watch the cold air fade away from his lips. He slowly starts to lean in and I don't turn away. Closing his eyes I close mine as well and let him kiss me. I place my hands behind his head and he places his hands around my waist deepening the kiss on my back porch. He holds me closer pressing his front against mine and kissing down my neck he uses his breath to warm up my skin sending shivers down my whole body.

Just as the kiss continues to get heated the back door swings open revealing Johnny and the rest of my friends. I quickly jump away from Mark fixing my hair and clothes. Emily comes out from behind Jamal and Sam follows behind her. "What are you guys doing out on the porch?" Johnny asks suspiciously.

"Just talking" I answer smoothing out my clothes and wiping my lips. Everyone seems to buy it including Johnny. Nodding his head he turns to the unlit fireplace. "Porch party?" he questioned. Everyone nods in agreement gathering chairs and beer as Emily walks over to set up the bonfire. Looking over at Mark my eyes meet his. He was already looking at me. Letting myself walk away to help Jaemin with the chairs I turn to see Sam glancing at the both of us and walking in Mark's direction.

I walked towards my bedroom door smelling my mom's bacon through the walls. "I should probably go thank him," I say taking the box off my nightstand and allowing Sam to place the locket back inside. Sam nods, "You should it's so pretty and while you're down there can you check if Mark is there, I have to talk to him" I look over at Emily who shakes her head. I look back at Sam, "Uh sure" she smiles standing up from my bed. "Great" she walks over to me and hugs me "Merry Christmas Y/n" then she makes her way to the bathroom. I look at Emily again who just shoes me away. I chuckle walking out my bedroom door.

On the way there I bump into Mark. "Oh sorry," we both say in unison. He's holding a towel in his hand and a toothbrush. "You can go first if you want," he said motioning towards the bathroom door. I shook my head. "It's okay I don't need it" There was a moment of silence. Why is every time we're alone together I act so weird like I can't form a clear sentence in my head. Deciding to escape this discomfort I chose to speak up. "Do you know where Jeno is?" I ask. Mark's large eyes meet mine. "He's helping your mom," he says. "Thank you," I say walking away however before I get far enough Mark clears his throat to stop me. "Merry Christmas Y/n," he says. "Merry Christmas Mark," I respond then turn and walk away. Walking outside I examined the front yard for Jeno.

Finally finding him helping my mom, move boxes into the basement. I start making my way over to them. "Hey Jeno," I wave him down. "Can I talk to you?" I ask. He nods smiling handing the heavy box over to Johnny who gladly takes it. He jogs over to me following me up the small hill. We start to walk further away to the opposite side of the front yard. “What's up?" he asks squinting his eyes from the sun. I sighed, This was gonna be hard. I didn't want to lose Jeno as a friend, he's a nice guy. I hope of lack of feelings for him isn't enough for him to end our friendship. "First off I want to say thank you for the necklace, it was really pretty," I say. Jeno nods putting his hands on his hips his sweater blowing in the morning breeze. He was still wearing his jogging outfit. His hair was stuck to his forehead and he let out deep breaths, probably tired from running and lifting all those boxes.

"I'm glad you liked it. Sam said you would" I nodded kicking a nearby pebble. "About that...I think it's pretty I do and I'm grateful for it, I just can't wear it" He crosses his arms over his chest. "How come?" He widens his eyes letting his arms fall "Is it too big?" he asks. I shake my head, "No I'm allergic to gold" He frowns letting his head all in disappointment. "I'm sorry I didn't know" I shake my head touching his arm. He lifts his head looking into my eyes. "It's okay," I smile. "Jeno I need to tell you something"

He stands up straight letting his arm relax under my touch. "Yea what's up?" he says. I sigh, I hope this goes well. "I like you, I do but not in the way you like me. I'm sorry if you feel like I led you on, but I think you should pursue someone who likes you the way you like me" I say hoping he doesn't get offended and walk away. Jeno nods his head understanding. "I get it. Thank you for being honest with me" he says, holding out his hand. I take his hand shaking it, we both look into each other's eyes and smile. "Thank you," I say. He nods, "Let's go back to the others, it's time to go" I nod walking with him to the car. Everyone had packed their things in my mom's trunk as well as the rental we had for our trip here. Johnny sat inside the rental car with Sam, Jaemin Jamal, and Jeno.

I sat next to my mom in the passenger seat as Emily sat in the back. Taking off to the airport my mom and Emily filled the car with conversation. Sam had blabbed to my mom about the necklace Jeno gave me. “I thought it was Jeno," she said surprised. "The boy with the blue hair right? I thought so too" My mom said. "It's very obvious he likes her," She said smirking. "And he's cute" she pointed out to Emily who just nodded her head. I shook my head, "He got me a gold necklace" I said. "He got you a gold necklace?" You're allergic," my mom said. I nodded "Yea, but he didn't know so I'm not mad. It was a little weird though. It felt like when you're boyfriend leaves a surprise for you so you can see it when you wake up" I say causing Emily to chuckle. "It was pretty tough, but not you're style," She said. I nodded, "Yea but at least he thought of me" My mom nodded agreeing with me. "It's always the thought that counts" I nodded turning away and looking towards the car window.

For the rest of the car ride, I remained looking out the window as Emily and my mom talked. My mind elsewhere only focusing on one person, Mark. A part of me wanted to turn around and talk to Mark and find out why. Why was he avoiding me so much? Why couldn't just tell me how he felt? It would make it so much easier to move on if he just opened up to me or maybe it would make me fall more in love with him. Maybe it's better if I never know. Maybe I should just go back to Boston and start a new life. No one takes me seriously anyway. "Y/N you're too nice, people will take advantage of you" or "Y/n love is stupid, it doesn't exist so stop forcing you're stupid narratives on us" Why do I have to have so many emotions? Why did I have to love and care for anything that lives? Why couldn't I just turn off my feelings like Sam or keep them hidden like Mark? Why did I have to be so weak all because I think love is special? Love is what brings people and creates families. Love is poured into everything, from art to lovers. Passion, hope, joy, and love why have I been deemed a fool for believing that everyone deserved love and romance? Everybody deserves somebody to love, everyone deserves a first love. That one big one you never forget, I will never forget Mark even if I have to let him go. Once we got to the airport we waited to board our flight.

Sam patted her jeans her eyes widening in fear. "My AirPods! I think I left them on the bench" She said. "You better go get them," Jamal said. Johnny nodded handing Jeno his bag. "I'll go with you" I shook my head, "It's okay I'll go, I want to use the bathroom," I said Johnny nodded taking his bag back. "Be back soon we leave in fifteen minutes" Jeno said. I nodded, "We should be back before then" I walked over to Sam as we walked off to find her AirPods. After ten minutes and a bathroom break, she found them underneath the bench. She sighed in relief "Thank you, Lord," she said placing them back in her bag. "Let's go we have three minutes left" I nodded following behind her.

"Wait!" I froze in my tracks. Sam stopped jogging off noticing I wasn't next to her. She squinted her eyes to see why I stopped. I turned around facing Mark who stood a couple of feet away from me. He walked towards me. I couldn't believe he was here right now. I couldn't move, my body was telling me to run up to Sam and catch my flight but my heart told me to stay right where I was. My heart wanted to hear him."Y/n..." he trailed. "You stopped," he said in slight disbelief that I didn't take off running. I couldn't my legs wouldn't let me. Sam walked over leaning closer to me "Y/n we only have two minutes left, we're gonna miss the flight" she said. I nodded slightly turning to her, "Just go ahead with put me I'll be there" She looked at me, and then Mark took off to the rest of the group.

“Whatever you have to say to me say it now. I have a plane to catch" I said crossing my arms over my chest and looking away from him. I hurt to treat him this way but I couldn't let him play with my heart anymore. I watched as he quickly scrambled around in his pockets pulling out a crumbled piece of looseleaf paper. Clearing his throat he spoke the words on the paper or at least tried to. “Y/n I want to start by saying that...that I um..." I tapped my foot eager for him to finish his sentence. Mark began sweating and speaking over his words. He huffed "Skrew this" I looked over at him as he ripped the paper up into pieces looking into my eyes. "Y/n you mean everything to me and I'm sorry," he said.

I scoffed, "That's it? We haven't seen or spoken to each other in over a year and all you have to say is that? I mean seriously you've been avoiding me since you kissed me and now you running to the airport to catch me just before I leave? What are you trying to pull here? I ask offended by his words. He wasn't being honest with me at all. It hurt that even now he wouldn't fight me. He sighed starting to walk away. I scoffed again shaking my head in disbelief. "You're unbelievable," I say walking away. I feel a hand around my arm turning me around. Mark had stopped once he heard me complain again about his lack of expression. His face had changed from defeat to frustration.

“I'm unbelievable? You're unbelievable! I don't know how to please you Y/n! It seems that everything I say or don't say is just another reason for you to walk away" I scoffed, "Oh so you're aware?" he gruffs, "See! See this is what I'm talking about. I'm doing my best to be perfect for you because I want to be with you. I care about you Y/n, you just make it so difficult to please you!" I rib my arm away from him stomping my foot on the ground. "I make it difficult? Mark all I've wanted you to do this whole time is open up to me. Talk to me! That's all I ever wanted and if you can't have a conversation with me if it's so "difficult" like you say then maybe we shouldn't be together" I said my chest heaving up and down. I was angry beyond the hills. How could he stand here and say that I was being difficult? I've made it easy for him. Always share and be honest with how I feel so he would feel comfortable talking to me. The tears that slipped out of my eyes began to burn my cheeks. I harshly wiped them away.

Mark sighed letting his head fall. "I was scared. Scared that I wasn't good enough for you. I mean look at you, you're so kind and open. Everywhere you go you make friends and people instantly like you. You're so good to me, you understand me and you see me. It makes me nervous and when you come close to me I sweat like a madman. I'm scared of losing you, I'm scared of you hating me, I'm scared you won't like me," He paused staring directly into my eyes. Shaking his head and taking my hands he began again." I don't care how it sounds you mean everything to me. After everything that's been happening in my life all my mind can wander to is you. Has Y/n eaten yet? Is she doing well? I hope she's taking care of herself. I hope she's finally found that love she is so desperately searching for" He said taking a moment to breathe. "Look Y/n I love you and I'm sorry I can't be the guy imagery guy you think about every night but I'm trying my best here" he pleaded.

“Mark..." I croaked feeling more tears form at the corner of my eyes. It felt like we were back in my bedroom fighting and loving like we always did. I didn't hear the people around us. I didn't hear nor notice my friends running over to get me and stop when they saw Mark. My attention only remained on Mark. The world stop moving for us at this moment. Time moved slowly as we poured our hearts out to each other and even though it was happening at an airport I was happy and grateful Mark was finally being honest with me. I think I should be honest with him."Ever since I was young and would hear about the stories between my mother and my father I dreamed of finding love like that. I wanted to be the girl whose lover ran home to her every night with a flower in his hand because he couldn't afford the bouquet. I wanted to be the girl who was loved regardless of the mistakes she made. I wanted to be loved for everything I have and for everything I gave. I wanted to be loved by someone who felt like a dream but still had flaws and imperfections because love isn't about being perfect and that's why I loved the idea of love so much. I envied my parent's relationship because up until this point my dad has loved my mother and my mother has loved my father. She still leaves small nothings for him under the tree and every day he leaves a lilac next to her nightstand and disappears into the basement. She just doesn't know because I take them. He figured she was throwing them away because they were always missing so he stopped and it's my fault" I cried. “Why are you telling me this?" Mark asked.

“Because he is her first love and you are mine" I confessed. "You are my lilac. You keep coming back into my life and I somehow make my way into yours. I think about you too every night and day. Is Mark okay? I hope he's studying well. I hope he's made a lot of friends" I confess more tears falling from my cheeks.

Mark wipes a few away with the pads of his fingers."Y/n I hate to break this up but we're gonna miss the flight," Emily says apologetically. Mark just looks into my eyes watching mine closely. I start to slip away from Mark's grasp letting his arms fall. As I start to turn away Mark grabs ahold of my arms pulling me into a kiss. He holds me close to him, holding the back of my head. Then he lets me go and I can't tell if this kiss is a goodbye or see you later.1 year later

"Y/N!!!" My friend shouted from the other side of our apartment. "What?" I asked as she walked into the room holding up crumbled wrapping paper. Her hair was a mess and she was sweating like a dog. I stood from my seat Emily stood up as well across from me. "What happened to you?" I asked. "Did you get into a fight with an elf?" Emily asked.

Sam huffed flopping on the couch letting the paper fall. "I've never wrapped a Christmas present before. I usually just place it in a pretty bag with pretty tissue paper then write on a pretty card" She whined annoyed with her lack of experience wrapping a gift. I walked over to her throwing away the useless paper. "Do you want help?" I asked she nodded. "Okay, I have to wrap Mark's gifts anyway so let's go," I said taking her hand. Emily followed us into Sam's room holding a pen and a pair of scissors.

"Who's the gift for anyway?" Emily asked.

"Johnny," Sam responded. Me and Emily both Oooed walking into her bedroom teasing Sam.

As we walk towards her room my phone rings, I smile at the contact.

"When are you gonna come visit me?" I ask Mark on the other side of my phone. He had recently moved to New York to work on becoming a writer. "I heard the weather is nice in Boston during this time" we both chuckle. "But I know my baby loves romance so why not Christmas in New York? You can't get any more romantic than that" I chuckle nodding my head.

“That is true, no one does Christmas like New York," I say. “I'll see what I can do," I say before hanging up the phone.

“Emily!" I shout from across the living room. "What?" she shouts back.

“I'm going to New York.." I waited until I spoke again. “Wanna come?"

Almost instantly I heard her footsteps running towards her bedroom door. Running into the living room holding onto her bag.

“Do I?" she questioned me like I was already supposed to know. I chuckled "Christmas in New York sounds good doesn't it?" I asked smiling. She picked up her phone

“I'm gonna call the whole gang" she said running off probably to back. I laughed shaking my head and walked to get my laptop.

On the plane to New York, I felt my phone buzz, picking it up I almost cried. Holding my hands to my mouth my dad's name appeared on my Lock Screen.

Dad- Merry Christmas

*Insert picture of Lilac*

Another text that came in.

Mom- I finally got them.

She wrote.

Y/n- It's so pretty.

Mom- I know right? Also, you're dad fixed our old car, you know it's the car we went to all of our dates in. You were made in that car.

Y/n- Ew mom.

Mom- What it's true! Anyways he and Mark did a good job. Have a safe flight, I love you.

Y/n- It does look good and Love you too.

I switched messages opening up mine and Mark's.

You- You told him?

…

Mark- Someone has to keep the romance alive.

———

“Merry Christmas," We all said in unison as we walked into Mark's small apartment. A small Christmas tree sat in the corner fully decorated with a star at the top. Candles were placed around the apartment as well as small decorations of snowflakes and elves. I walked over to Mark kissing his lips.

"Merry Christmas," He said against my lips.

“Merry Christmas" I responded kissing him again. We kissed for a while longer until Mark pushed off walking to the small desk next to the couch.

“I almost forgot," He said handing me a box. "Merry Christmas," he said. I opened the box and took out a silver key picking up the small note inside. My first love. We fell in love, despite our differences, and something rare and beautiful was created. I was awed.

“You copied that from the Notebook" He smiled taking me in his arms. “Someone has to keep the romance alive," He said kissing me again as the snow fell outside.

Fin

Hope you enjoyed my first ever short story on here. This is also my first Nct short story so I hope you enjoyed. Thank you for reading. Stay safe!

[bellygunnr]

In the Grill

A continuation of " Blood on the Hood ".

The shadow of someone jogging across estate grounds at sub-five in the morning is almost enough to prompt Bonnie to pull over. She’s been here long enough to know the patterns-- the walking trails are less for use and more for show. The only folks up this early are the groundskeepers, cleaning crew, and her. She considers investigating for only a second. If it’s egregious, someone with a better paycheck than her will tell her. For now-- she has other things to worry about.

Like her job, and her dying boss, and the fact that she can already see lights on at her destination. She knocks her head back against the seat with a groan. Either someone beat her there, or someone stayed far too late, and she has an inkling as to who. A yellow Gremlin sitting in the glorified parking lot only confirms her suspicions. It’s with exasperation that she parks next to the little compact and shuts off her truck.

For a moment, all she does is stare past the hood and into the grounds. The Foundation headquarters is a baffling amount of territory. All she knows is she’s somewhere in the middle of it, with the lab and the test track. She climbs out onto the pavement before the ensuing silence grows too loud, lets the cool air ground her, and ducks inside with the swipe of her badge.

But she has to go down. She gives the elevator her retina scan and tries not to feel claustrophobic in the steel gray box. Harsh lights and freezing cold air greet her on the way out.

“April!” Bonnie calls.

Most of the lab is clean. Only a couple techs are in, which she throws looks at, but they’re not the target of her ire, so she blows past them to where a half-dismantled car dominates most of the floor space. Among it all, one woman sits, apparently triple-checking measurements.

“Dr. Curtis,” Bonnie tries again. “Good morning.”

April jumps.

“Oh, Bonnie! You’re here la-- right on time. I…”

April smiles sheepishly. She makes an aborted movement to run her fingers through her hair, which is too busy being clipped into a tight bun.

“Look, I was just trying to finalize some things… We have to completely refab the roof and pillars and I lost track of time. I can leave?”

“Finish up what you’re doing and sign out. You’ve been taking notes, right?”

Bonnie glances over at the vehicle. She decides not to question why only half of it had to be reconstructed-- not until she sees the documentation.

“Of course! Yeah, they’re in the usual place. I’ll kick out the others with me--”

Good, she thinks. KITT is too easily distracted when there’s more than a couple people in the lab, but she doesn’t tell April that.

“Thanks, April. And get some sleep-- I mean it. We’re not on crunch time yet and I don’t-- I don’t want everyone burning out.”

April’s expression softens, but her eyes narrow knowingly. “Then you need to lead by example, Dr. Barstow. I know what you’re doing! You’re not the only one who cares about this project.”

“I know I’m not,” Bonnie says, a touch too hot. “Anyway, have you seen anyone weird out on the grounds lately?”

Mercifully, April turns back to her work (though not quickly enough to hide an eye-roll). “You know? Yeah. I caught one of Mr. Knight’s guests snooping around a couple days ago. He-- she left pretty fast.”

Huh. Wilton never mentioned anything about that, but maybe that explained the measurements her team received a few days ago. The orders tied to the information had tacked tens of hours more onto their work. And Devon rarely knew enough to clarify anything…

She shakes her head.

Eventually, April and the others leave. At six sharp, KITT onlines, but doesn’t speak for a full two hours. An hour after that, the rest of the day team arrives and takes over much of the work.

---

She finds Wilton’s so-called esteemed guest in the bathroom. Or, more precisely, the esteemed guest finds her-- by shoulder-checking her with the door and bleeding from the head. Bonnie takes in their appearance in haphazard bursts. The heavily bandaged face, the shaved head, freckled skin all of the way down, dark pants and a tank top that sits low on the chest. And no bra, which is almost as pressing as the spots of blood dripping down the bridge of her nose.

“Wh-oh, this is occupied! Where’s the first aid kit?”

Her expression is hard to discern from the bandaging and scarring, but her tone is shocked, urgent, nervous. Bonnie shakes her head in disbelief and tries to look anywhere but the blood, nausea already making short work of what little she had for lunch.

“The door was locked,” Bonnie says instead, strained. “Why-- how--?”

“The nurse was coming and I panicked,” she says plainly. “You look a little pale. You good?”

Bonnie waves a hand dismissively and drops to her knees, blindly fumbling for the seam of the cabinet doors underneath the bathroom sink. They come loose with a hollow sound and she finds the medical supplies quickly, mostly because she’s had to use it before. It hadn’t been her brightest moment (and Devon had nearly fired her).

The woman reaches forward, but Bonnie swats the hands away.

“I’m not letting you re-dress your own bandages,” she says hotly. “Sit down.”

She’s a professional, god dammit.

“But—”

“I think you’d rather let me patch you up than get caught by Devon,” Bonnie says sternly.

She steels herself enough to make eye contact. The soft lighting catches the woman’s visible eye, drawing out an intense blue. It’s almost as distracting as her lifting placating hands and shimmying around to sit atop the toilet, teeth bared in a grin.

“I’m Michael,” the woman says.

She-- Michael-- thrusts out a hand. It’s covered in dust and wood shavings. Bonnie frowns down at it and the nitrile gloves she was just about to slip on.

“Or Michelle!” She amends, spreading her hands.

“Not... the problem. Michael’s a fine name. I’m Dr. Barstow.”

Bonnie winces a second after. Michael has a grin, now, and a calculating gleam in her eye that follows Bonnie through the process of examining the bloodied bandages. The detritus that’d covered her hands is on her scalp, too.

“The hell did you do?”

“Climbed out of a window, don’t worry about it. Say, who’s Devon?”

The blood doesn’t particularly smell like anything. It just gleams wetly and dries sticky and is a vivid red reminder of what lays under the skin. She swallows down a wave of nausea. At least Michael has the decency to remain quite still, even tilting her head this way and that when Bonnie asks.

“…Wrong question, uh?” Michael continues on, blithe as anything. “Is it bad, doc? Am I dyin’?”

Jesus. Bonnie shakes her head, surprised to feel a bubble of laughter against her throat. The world spins a little in protest.

“I’m not a medical doctor,” she says. “And if climbing out of a window with a head wound didn’t kill you…”

“Either you will or nothing can,” Michael finishes solemnly. “Got it. You almost done?”

Michael bobs her head in tune with her little joke and drums her fingers across her thighs. Bonnie barely resists giving her an admonishing swipe, directing the energy into finishing the bandages.

She leans back, pulling off the gloves and throwing them into the trash. Now disinfectant sits heavy in the back of her throat. The world rolls languidly. Yeah, maybe she overestimated herself this go around. But Michael’s sheer presence raises more questions than it answers, and Bonnie doesn’t like leaving things unanswered.

Who is she? Why is she injured-- why did she climb out of a window? If she’s here, in the estate, how does she not know Devon? Maybe she’s Knight’s daughter, but-- he doesn’t have any children. Does he?

Bonnie looks down at Michael and her nervous energy critically.

Michael’s palms dig into the tops of her knees while her fingers drum a pattern. Her visible eye moves around, clearly picking out the full depth of the bathroom and the distance from the door. A low-level tension simmering underneath the skin makes toned muscle jump out-- and she’s already a good head over Bonnie.

“Where do you plan on going after this?” Bonnie asks.

Michael blanches. She rocks back and forth, tongue running across chapped lips.

“Well, I was lookin’ for the kitchen, the first go around…”

“Funny. I was just about to go on lunch break,” Bonnie says, suddenly thoughtful.

Granted, she doesn’t feel like eating now. But something tells her it’d be best to keep Michael in her sights rather than let her gallivant around. Plausible deniability and all that.

Michael’s brow pulls forward. Her head cocks to the side, tracking Bonnie intently.

“My truck’s out in the front,” Bonnie says casually. “Can’t miss it, it’s ugly as sin. Meet me out there and I’ll be right behind you.”

Her face lights up-- she cottons on fast and vaults toward the door, slamming it shut behind her. The stone-and-tile bathroom echoes for a long moment with the sound.

Hopefully the truck isn’t locked, because Bonnie spends the next ten minutes hurling and cleaning up.

[bishopsbelova]

Chenford + Why did you date Ashley??

Or you can read it on A03

Lucy’s standing, leaning against her counter, slowly stirring her coffee when Tim finally appears from the bedroom. “So why did you date Ashley?”

The words escape Lucy's mouth before she even gives it a second thought. She doesn’t know why she asks it now of all places - sure she’s been wondering about it for a while; but she wasn’t planning on just bombarding him with it this early in the morning. 

Tim stumbles, his hand frozen midway towards the coffee pot. He slowly pulls back, turning around and leans against the counter.

"What?" he asks, slowly, running a hand over his face and wishing his half asleep brain would catch up.

They had both had a late night, coming in at the wee hours of the morning to try and crash for just a couple of hours, before going back into their separate cases. It’d been a wild and busy last few weeks - between Lucy’s detective hours and Metro’s hours, they’d mostly been seeing each other in passing. 

"Um," Lucy immediately starts backtracking, both physically and figuratively. As if she finally realized just what had tumbled out of her mouth.  "You know what, never mind."

Tim turns around and leans against Lucy's kitchen counter. He smirks as he crosses his arms over his chest. A part of Lucy is wondering if he wishes he could throw the question back at her; except he's the one who set her up with Chris in the first place.

“Lucy,” he starts, reaching for his coffee cup again. 

She glances towards the clock on the stove and once again tries to shove the subject off. “We’ve both got to get to work. I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

“It’s fine, Lucy,” Tim says, taking a sip of the coffee. “Just probably not the right time, all things considered.” 

Suddenly his voice starts ringing and he reaches for it, answering with a crisp. “Bradford…. Be right there.” 

“Duty calls,” Lucy says. 

He walks around the counter so that he can pass her on his way back towards the bedroom. He presses a kiss into her forehead. “We’ll talk later, I promise.” 

//

Turns out later wasn’t until roughly fourteen hours later, when he was finally coming into the apartment with a bag of takeout in his hand. Lucy’s up, curled on the couch with a glass of wine waiting for him. 

“I figured you’d still be up,” Tim comments, setting the bag on the counter before kicking off his shoes. He nods towards the bag. “So I got extra.”

“Angela and I grabbed a bite after work,” Lucy says, standing up from the couch. “But that was a couple hours ago, I could eat a little.” 

Tim drops his work bag by the door with the intention of getting it later. He walks towards the counter, untying the take-out bag and dishing out the container. 

Lucy walks the short distance, placing the wine glass on the counter as she heads for the cabinet for plates. “You know, it’s late, we don’t have to –”

“It’s not that late.” Tim shrugs. He’s right, it’s only just before nine and she’s finally off tomorrow - mostly at the insistence of her new boss after the past week. 

“Wait,” she starts, turning around with the plates and setting them on the island. “Don’t you have to work –”

Tim shakes his head as he opens one of the food containers. “We finally rounded up all the criminals we were looking for, got a break in our case and I figured with the two long days, we could all take a day or at least a half day.” 

“Right.” 

A beat of silence passed between them while food was divided up onto the plates, a smaller portion on Lucy’s. They take a seat at the island with their plates and Lucy reaches for her wine glass. 

“I don’t know if there was really a set list of reasons why,” Tim says eventually, breaking the silence. He speaks slowly as if he’s not really sure how to get the words out. “She was there, she was nice and we got along…the first date went decent enough and it just kept going until it didn’t.” 

Lucy just nods. 

“Maybe it was also a distraction.”

Lucy raises an eyebrow. “Distaction?”

Tim turns towards her, a glint in his eyes that she can’t quite place. “I think that’s probably pretty obvious, Luce.” He lets out a sigh. “But maybe she was a distraction from whatever the hell I had going on and whatever the hell was between us.” 

Lucy sighs, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Maybe it should have been obvious after that double date we went on.” 

Tim chuckles and ducks his head, as if he too is remembering how they spent more time that time talking to each other instead of their dates. It should have scared her then - how comfortable she was around him, how easy conversation happened despite how long they saw each other every day - but it never did and it still doesn’t. 

“So what about you?”

Lucy hesitates, her wine glass hovering in mid air. “You’re technically the one who pushed me to go out with Chris.” 

“But not why you dragged it out,” he turns towards her. “Even towards the end there, you wanted to end things; but didn’t. Even asked me for advice on how to, in case you forgot.” 

Lucy lets out a breath and turns to fully face him, meeting his gaze. “Maybe it was just somewhat easier, hiding in a nowhere relationship instead of facing the truth.” 

She thinks back to how scared she was of admitting how she felt about Tim, about the possibility of losing the most important relationship she’s had. As if reading her thoughts, knowing exactly where she went, Tim reaches across the space, places a hand on her knee and squeezes. 

“Be that as it may, we got to where we were supposed to be eventually.” “Yeah, we did.”

[charlottedabookworm]

Dawntrail Day 7+8 (part 1/2)

spoilers up to: lvl100 msq quest Dawntrail

original draft date: 4-5/7/24

scheduled release for: 31/7/2024

working on day 7 so i’m merging these. since i’ve only got a couple hours i'mma do my tribals on picto and then do the instance i stopped at yesterday, hopefully get close to a dungeon/trial unlock but really not got much time. day 8 i'm finishing up msq 100% no matter how long it takes me and then hopefully doing the two optional dungeons!

*

…completely forgot that zoraal ja gave the order to kill all the civilians in solution nine

nice way to start the morning

*

“I have no more use of you, begone”

hmmmm thats an odd thing to say considering you were claiming he wasn’t your son before

fingers crossed nothings up with gulool ja

*

annnnd fade to black with the echoing sound of an execution shot lovely haven’t heard that since shadow ringers

*

pfft that last one!

except i really don't care what sphene thinks ngl

*

otis is back!

yes!

really didn’t want to kill him

*

damn

he was a good guy

*

okay but-

where is erenville?

they wouldn’t kill him off offscreen i know that much but we’d better not find him dying i swear to fucking everything I will-

*

*stares at crying child*

fuuuuck i really hope you're not a trap

*

oh thank fuck he's alive

also sorry your mums dead and has been a probably a long time mate

*

huh

he didn't mention it

why didn't you mention it erenville, what are you thinking rn?

*

no, please

this actually is important information to have

considering your mum is possibly the same sort of endless otis is and she had to end up that way somehow

*

love looking at this ngl

so much easier and nicer doing it as you progress through the zones

*

i made it to the fifth dungeon unlock but since there's almost certainly a trial afterwards and i have barely enough time to do the dungeon if i zoom through it, i'mma wait and do it in the morning

soooo wondrous tails time for picto ig

*

oh

thats just rude we didn't need that

*

ayyy alphi esti and shtola!

only reason theyve shown up just before i should be unlocking a trial is cos it can be done in trust? maybe? pls?

*

fuuuck that looks like a voidgate to me

zoraal ja wtf have you been doing

*

oh?

could it maybe lead to whichever reflection the alexandrian's are from

final zone in another shard? maybe?

*

so ig it’ll be like ‘we beat him he flees we chase’

boom final zone and trial and dungeon?

either that or sphene will actually be the final boss which still wouldn’t surprise me

*

the framing reminds me of hades ngl

like it tho

*

i know you're having a crisis but has it occured to you that you were born because your dad liked kids? like i know your entire existence is like. a miracle and gulool ja ja didn't know he could have bio kids til you were born but that man obviously lived for being a dad

*

this music-

just gonna sit here and listen to this for a bit before i enter the trial lol

*

genuinely forgot that y'shtola used to run around as a conjurer

it feels like so long ago now lol and i half expected them to have rdm healer ali again

*

okay his second phase actually looks cool

and isn't a massive floating head sitting at the edge of the arena which gives many bonus points

*

zoraal ja looks pretty dead to me and we still have a dungeon and trial to go so-

sphene, cachuia, or some third unknown threat? taking bets now

*

yeah it’s sphene 100% isn’t it

‘deliver my people’ huh

*

yeahhhh there we go

*

once again, i agree with ali

how many will you slaughter, sphene, so that your endless (yourself included) will live another day

how many children will you sacrifice so that your may live your hundredth lifetime

*

but they aren't remembered

i'm gonna scream how dare you say that when your system removes the memories of a deceased person from everyone who knew them

how dare you-

*

how dare you bring his mother into this

his mother, who everyone from his village has forgotten because of your system-

i-

*

don't worry koana, it's not the first time

this is basically a tuesday for me i'll keep your sister safe

*

i love him he's so sweet

i'm so glad gulool ja didn't turn out to be a trap

that probably would have broken my heart

*

that graphics update really looking peak on the af gear

wow

look at that metal

(now to time glam back over it)

*

so thw question is

another dungeon immediately?

huh nope

*

ooooooo it so pretty

it has canals

*

cachuia i'm guessing

i see where erenville gets the pretty from

*

oh

oh erenville love you're not going to take this well

your mother is dead and alive (did she get a choice? did they just pluck up her memories adn make her endless?) and she wants them all to die again

*

i love this

but also raha breaking my heart every expansion he's in

love him for that

*

oh so we're continuing to traumatise both erenville and wuk lamat i see

great

wonderful

thank you very much for that square

*

screaming crying throwing up why are you doing this to me

*

"I'm put in mind of Lyhe Mheg"

a tribe quest reference? in my final fantasy 14 msq?

*

this cutscene is legit one of my favourite parts of the expansion

sure we gotta shut down the memories of all these kids but we'll give them something nice before that

*

ayo wtf

those are kriles bio parents

so i see we’re spreading the trauma to krile to join with erenville and wuk lamat

glad she can maybe get some closure tho

*

love raha running up to krile and her parents and just chomping down on ice cream to break the ice between her parents

he’s such a good friend

*

....oh i hit the image cap.

alright part 2 incoming

[goshdangronpa]

fight club owner here askin some of ur favorite non-DR games

current resident brainworms on my end are banjo-kazooie, ratchet&clank, and yakuza/rgg. but i like a lot of games in general!!!

Nice nice! I've been very interested in Yakuza, and I put a few hours into Banjo-Kazooie on Switch Virtual Console before getting stuck T_T

Yup, this needs a readmore

The Super Smash Bros series must be my fave. Growing up, I primarily played video games with my siblings and friends, and no multiplayer experience could top beating the tar out of each other as our fave video game characters. I've owned every game in the series and my main in Ultimate is Bowser. It's also the closest I've ever been to joining a fandom - not nearly to the same extent as DR, though I did draw stuff about the game as a kid, nearly embarked on a massive fanfic project as a college student, and checked the Smash Bros Dojo every day for Brawl, Sm4sh, and Ultimate.

Super Mario 64 is the first video game I ever played, so it'll always hold a special place in my heart. It helps that the game is so goddamn fun. Even when I'm not doing the missions, it's nice just to vibe in these wonderfully designed environments, check out some of the secrets, play with the glitches, just be in the game. Just last year, my siblings and I marathoned the game, getting 70 stars and beating the final boss in just a few seconds shy of four hours.

The game that's inspired me to look past Nintendo and its usual third parties is Sayonara Wild Hearts, which I just beat a few days ago. A rhythm game that incorporates so many video game genres and playstyles into a breathtakingly original and exhilarating experience. You could easily beat the game in a couple hours, or you can replay every level for gold ranks and clean runs, or you can just swim through the courses and take in the fantastic atmosphere and gorgeous visuals and especially the start-to-finish brilliant pop soundtrack. Begin Again is the best song I've heard in many a moon. Get it. You won't regret it.

Various other faves include The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, Undertale, Balloon Fight, Super Mario Galaxy, Rock Band 3, and Mario Kart 64

[squishysquid88]

Gamer giggles

lee - Marcy

ler- Sasha

Marcy has been gaming for hours and wont take a break or come out of her room, so Sasha has to step in.

T.W. this is a sfw ticklefic but i hear some people arent to chill with that so. . . be warned.

NOW ON WITH THE FLUFF!!!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Marcy, you said you would take a break hours ago" sasha said as she leaned against the doorframe of their room.

"i-i know but im almost finished, just give me acouple more minutes," Marcy said with her eyes still glued to the screen.

"really? just a couple more minutes? hmmm, y'know i cant help but think ive heard that before, oh right, i have, and when was that?" Sasha pretended to think "now i remember! two hours ago." sarcasm filled sashas mouth.

"and im really sorry about that but this boss is, reeeeaaaalllyyy tough to beat and i- GAHHH!! nononon-" Marcy paniked over her game, causing Sasha to blush and smile slightly at her dorkyness. she chuckled as she moved closer.

"what are you even playing?" Sasha leaned over marcy's shoulder and took a look at the switch she was holding. wrapping her arms around marcys waist as she snuggled up against her on the bed, the smaller girl's back against her chest.

"The Scenic Route, game 4. its about a girl named Stacy Miller and her family who get lost on their rode trip and then transported to another world. now they hafto fight off monsters and travel the new world to find out how to get back ho-OOME. whew, almost died."

"huh, how ironic." Sasha uttered

"pff, right?"

"ugh, please marmar, cant you play your games later?" Sasha wined and nuzzled her face into the crook of Marcys neck causing her to giggle.

"sasha stahap, your gonna mahake me lohohos," Marcy squeaked. just then, Sasha got a bright idea. she placed each of her hands on either side of Marcy's hips, whichmade marcy worry.

"s-Sasha, heh, what-what are you doing?" Marcy stuttered.

"c'mon Wuwubear, last chance. come hang out with meeeeee, we can cuddle up on the couch and watch bluckboosters. we can even watch that one show you like, whats it called again, oh right Monster ball Z!" Sasha mumbled into her neck, Marcy giggled when she spoke,

"suhur b-but not right nohow, i really nehed to fihihinish this gahahame" Marcy persisted through all her little laughs and snickers.

"please, i miss you." sasha nuzzled further making it hard for marcy to speak withought her words fading into more laughs and wandering giggles, and even harder for her play her game.

"lahadeheher!" Marcy tried to push her away.

*sigh, "must you be soooooo stubborn" sasha said with a grin. immediately she had begun squeezing at Marcy's sides, she moved her fingers slowly just beneath her armpits.

marcy squeaked "s-sahahasha cuhut it-" she had begin to say only to interupt her self withmore giggles as sasha made her way down to her hips. "w-wa-WAIT, SAHAHSHA-"

"what marbles? im not doing anything" sasha snickered, still tickling Marcy's neck

she ccontinued to squeeze at Marcy's side with one hand as she moved the other up to Marcy's ribs, gently wiggling her fingers in between each bone. Dropping her switch in her lap, Marcy tried to pull sashas arms away, only to retract emedietly when sasha reached under her shirt and began scribbling at the bare skin of Marcy's under arms.

"STAHAHAHAP" marcy yelled, still trying to squirm out of Sashas lap

"are you gonna hang out with me? huh? huh? huh?" sasha tanted

"FIHIHIHINE, IHIHIL-" marcy was interupted when she felt Sashas hands drifting towoards her stomach

"PFFAAHAHAHA, STAHAHA"

"what was that? i couldn't hear you," she teased.

every time marcy woudl make an attempt at responding sasha would just interupt her with more tickles or jokes. so much so that marcy could barely get a word out.

"YOUHUHUHUR SOHOHO MEHEHAN!!" marcy barked

sasha laughed and slowed down her squeezes, just enough to the point wear marcy would speak ckearly to her, and no more.

"so wadaya say MarMar, take a break?" Sasha asked for a final time

"doho i really hahave a choice" Marcy puffed out a few extra giggles

"mmmmm, no." sasha held her gently

"eheh heh, sure why not" Marcy smiled genuenly and pecked Sasha on the lips, Sasha's cheeks turned red at the sudden action but quickly calmed down one Marcy leaned back into her chest.

"but were watching but were watching Demon Hunter, not Monster ball Z" Marcy said softly

"Demon Hunter it is," sahsa said softly, pulling Marcy into her soft embrace

leaving the game forgoten on the bed.

[owlixx]

Operation Terminus

So…I’ve canceled my plan to play/replay the first nine Assassin’s Creed games following my current playthrough of Valhalla. Instead, I’ll be cleaning up my “backlog”. Given the nature of what I do and how I play games, that’s less about which games I “own” and more about which games I’ve already sunk some time into.

Games I’m close to finishing:

* Assassin’s Creed Valhalla Xbox

Yeah this is the one I’m currently doing so definitely going to finish here before moving on, but I maybe do some small sonic game runs before digging into this operation proper.

* Phoenix Wright 1 3DS

I’m sooooo close, I’m like halfway through the final case, the DS exclusive one.

* Midnight Suns Xbox

Okay admittedly I’m only like…just past the start of Act 2 but this one is a priority before all the information completely leaves my brain. Plus the DLC is all out now and I own it!

* Wind Waker Wii U

I’m literally over halfway done with the triforce hunt so this is super close but I lost about an hour of progress last time I played over a year ago and haven’t touched it since. Shouldn’t be more than a couple days of playing left.

* Sonic Unleashed Xbox

Stuck on empire city, I just need to get some more medals to progress. Using a guide should help.

Games I’m near or around half done:

* Skyward Sword Wii U

In Lanayru Desert for the first time, not yet to the dungeon. So 1/4 - 1/3 done with the game? The motion controls kill me but standing up might help

* Metroid Prime 1 Wii U

Similar to wind waker, lost a good chunk of progress last time I played to space pirates. I don’t think you can turn down the difficulty after starting a playthrough but I should if I can.

* Donkey Kong Country Tropical Freeze Wii U

Stuck on boss of world…3? I do really enjoy this game when it works well

* Wario Land 3 Switch

I think I’m around half? Game is just big and other stuff came up

* Hot Shots Tennis Get A Grip PS Vita

Actually no idea how long this game is but it’s awesome

* Ratchet and Clank 2 PS3

I think I’m around half? Just got new ps3 controllers

* Bulletstorm PS3

I think I just started act 4 of 7, enjoying it so far

* War For Cybertron (dad?)

Okay admittedly I’m like less than half done with the first of two campaigns but I think I’ll be trying this coop soon online with my dad

* Fire Emblem Awakening 3DS

I think I’m on chapter 8 of 25

* Fire Emblem Warriors Three Hopes Switch

I can’t remember how far I got actually but I feel like I poured a good amount of time in already

* Xenoblade Chronicles Wii

Maybe 1/3 done with game?

* Professor Layton 1 DS

Maybe 2/3 done? I tried to omit games I’ve already beaten from this list unless I’m super close to beating them again and it’s been a while

* Mario Kart 7 3DS

I just kind of plink away at unlocking all the courses now and then but this shouldn’t take long with any effort applied

* Monster Tale DS

Again no clue how long this one is but I feel like I’m a good chunk into it, maybe 1/4

* Deadpool PS3

I think I’m on chapter 4 of 8

Games I Can Skip The Intro On:

* Mega Man Battle Network DS

I’m past the first main boss but not yet to the second. Playing a fan Tran of the Ds remake

* Mega Man Battle Network 2 GBA

I think same as above

* Death Stranding PC

Honestly this is a huge game and I’m only maybe 6 hours in

* Disco Elysium PC

Maybe 15 hours in?

* Metal Gear Solid 4 PS3

Barely past tutorial

* Bayonetta Wii U

Literally just past tutorial

* Mario and Luigi Superstar Saga Remake 3DS

Out of tutorial and past first main boss

* Final Fantasy Tactics Advance GBA

Decent clip into this one, maybe 15 hours, but it’s a huge game

* Puzzle and Dragon Z 3DS

Still in the tutorial in the main game, on world 3 or 4 of the Mario version

* Pilotwings Resort 3DS

I mean, it’s such a short game that the couple hours I’ve played is like half of it

* Dragon Age Origins Xbox

Maybe ten hours in? Big game though

* Final Fantasy VI GBA

Only 2-3 hours in and a huge game

* Twilight Princess Wii U

Just past the tutorial if that

* Crisis Core PS Vita

Think I’m still in the first real mission after the tutorial

* Locoroco PS Vita

Towards the end of world 2

* Patapon 2 PS Vita

Okay not actually far in but I’m considering the five or so hours I spent in Patapon 1 to be a kind of sunken cost tutorial

* Dead Space Extraction Wii U

I think…3 missions in? Out of 10?

* Sonic Colors Wii U

On world…3? Out of 7? Played before and replaying taking turns with partner

* Uncharted Golden Abyss PS Vita

Okay just past tutorial admittedly

* Wipeout 2048 PS Vita

Like Mario kart, i plonk away at this here and there

* Luigi’s Mansion 2 3DS

First of five mansions down

* Retro Game Challenge DS

I wanna say I’m on the third or fourth game of 8

* Grand Theft Auto 4 PS3

Maybe 2-3 hours in

* ICO PS3

1-2 hours in

* Demon Souls PS3

Okay barely even got past making a character, just got to the hun world at all

* Pokémon Sun 3DS

Okay this one I’m actually more like half done with I think, maybe closer to 1/3 but it’s been a while.

* Elebits Wii

Maybe 3 or 4 of the 25 levels done