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rosenburg-lia · 5 years ago

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What Does One Even Do?

WHAT? — Lia has Vanessa over to discuss her situation.

WHEN? — saturday night, april 4th

TRIGGERS? — pregnancy

FEATURING — Vanessa Montgomery ( @thevmontgomery ) mentions of Drew Torres and Tori Santamaria

lia: I cant be a mom, I barely even know how to take care of myself. One of the thoughts that swirled through Lias brain over the last hour. Still sat on the side of the bathtub, the pregnancy test laid on the sink. Her elbow resting on her knee as her focused trained on a specific spot on the floor. Her only move since she had seen the test was to grab her phone and text Vanessa. How the fuck does one even begin to take care of a kid? Taking a deep breath as she stood on shaky legs, collecting the test and her phone as she walked out of the bathroom. She couldnt even grab her usual vices to deal with the anxiety raking her body. Her body felt almost empty, her mind filled to the brim, but as she sat on the couch, wrapping herself in a ball, her hands instinctively fell to her stomach.

Vanessa: It was like her mind got a jump start reading Lia's message. Most of her messages went unnoticed, read, but unnoticed. There wasn't any reason she felt the need to see or speak to everyone all things considering, but Vanessa couldn't leave Lia at a time like this. Vanessa remembered going through all this alone. She remembered staring at the test, having no idea who to call and sitting in a dark room for days by herself. Vanessa wasn't going to let Lia go through that. As soon as she reached Luke and Lia's apartment, she moved straight through the house, finding Lia immediately and wrapping her arms around the girl. Was it for her comfort or the other girl's? It didn't matter, they both needed someone right now.

lia: she allowed herself to be engulfed by vanessa. the tears already falling from her eyes as she felt her arms around her. "I fucked up V," She choked out, "I cant be a mom," She spoke, glancing up to meet her gaze. She was grateful she had Vanessa in her life, even in whatever drama she was going through that made her leave town, she was still there when Lia needed her. But it would take some time for Lia, nothing was processing just feeling like facts floating through the air.

Vanessa: "you didn't fuck up, Lia," vanessa replied softly. it was all flushing back to her remembering this moment for herself. distraught on the floor feeling time collapsing. vanessa rubbed her friend's back, trying to provide whatever comfort she could bring. "we're going to get through this okay? together, i'm not going to let you do this alone."

liaa: "yea i did," She mumbled, her mind flashing through the memories of what shed done. Her night with Drew, telling Tori and subsequently losing her for now, and now this. "I cant let you say that without knowing the whole story," She sighed running her fingers through her hair. "The father is Drew," She spoke softly, "And I dont know what the fuck to do.."

Vanessa: it took everything in vanessa to pull herself together. she took a deep breath, "look, drew is an idiot, but he's gone through this before and i promise you he's going to do the right thing when you tell him, but i'm telling you you're going to have to tell him. you'll regret it for the rest of your life if you don't." she paused, feeling a little choked up about her own situation. vanessa stood up, and grabbing her friend's hand to sit on the tub rail. "we're going to go to the doctor and confirm how far along you are, but listen no impulsive thinking, no drinking, no smoking, no sleeping around, /nothing/."

liaa: her brows scrunched together at vanessas words, "What do you mean hes been through this before?" A sigh as she listened to her words, "I know, I plan on telling him. I will tell him," She paused before mumbling out, "eventually," Her eyes meeting vanessas as she spoke, nodding with her words, "I know, Im really sad too because I picked up a nice eighth," She chuckled, "Kidding...sort of," She sighed, "Im not sleeping around V, I never really have. Im taking this seriously, gonna read all the books and articles. Figure out my choices,"

liaa: "I dont even want to think about how Ill look pregnant, let alone if I have a kid," She spoke, "But I need to know everything, ya know?"

Vanessa: looked down, knowing she had to tell Lia eventually, after all that was the whole reason she came here. "At the end of Freshman year, I found out I was pregnant. He was there for me like with everything. He drove me to all my doctors appointments, let me stay over his place whenever my father got too much, even went on 2 am runs for me to get chinese and crap. And god, did that boy love my son with all his heart," she paused, her voice growing a little weak, but forcing some strength once she looked back to Lia. "He did right by me and he didn't even have to. With you, he's gonna give you and that baby the world if you let him," Vanessa explained. "We don't have to worry about any of that right now. What we need to worry about is you."

liaa: Her eyes widened, but she stayed silent, her brain did not however. The dots connecting in her head when Drew would disappear at times, realizing it was to go visit vanessa, to support her. A fond smile coming to her face as she thought about the boy, even as a best friend, he had been in dad mode from the jump. A part of her feeling warm knowing he wouldnt shove her away, or at least she hoped. "Im scared. Not worried, or nervous. But scared," She spoke, "Its terrifying to know that this has been growing in me, that someone is in there. Not just my organs anymore. I cant just go buckwild when I want because I want. My whole life is getting twisted V,"

Vanessa: "Come on, Li," Vanessa spoke softly. She wasn't going to let her friend be down on herself. She offered her hand out, "I'm gonna do for you what I wish someone would have done for me." Vanessa walked slowly, leading the girl back towards Lia's room and guiding her towards her bed. "Get in. Right now it's the size of a lima-bean at best. All this worrying is going to hurt you more than worrying will hurt the bean."

liaa: She smiled softly, taking her hand, following her through the apartment to her room. "V, its not my place, but did everyone know about your pregnancy? Or just drew?" She asked, "I dont think I want everybody, even the close ones, knowing," pulling the covers of her bed up, curling into them as she laid in the bed. "Ive grown up on worry, I think I can survive,"

Vanessa: pulled out her phone, her home screen showing a photo of Rocky and Vanessa sitting by a Christmas tree with matching smiles that took up their whole faces. "Drew's the only person who knew he was my son for a really long time, like almost three years now. Everyone else just assumed he was my little brother," she explained. "You only have to tell who you want to. I didn't even tell the father until a few months ago. Everyone isn't entitled to your life," she added. Vanessa laid in bed besides her friend, hoping that she was somehow helping. "You've gotta more than survive now."

liaa: Lia smiled as she saw the photo, "Hes adorable V," Listening as Vanessa spoke, her heart warming at the thought of Drew and Rocky interacting. "Im sure youre a great mom," She spoke softly, "Is Dallas the dad? Or did timelines overlap?" She asked, raising a brow, her tone void of all judgment and just interested in the part of her best friend she didnt know. "Why did it have to be Drew? Why couldnt it be Owen or Luke? Did God just wanna send a big fuck you my way? Want to ruin my relationship with Tori?" She sighed, "Or was it karma for not being honest with T from the gun? About everything.."

Vanessa: 's head dropped. She wasn't going to worry Lia about everything going her tragic motherhood. She wasn't a great mother, but that wasn't something she wanted to get into now. "Overlap," Vanessa said lowly. "Hence, me not telling the father until just a while ago." She knew it was wrong and saying it out loud made it all sound ghetto and fucked up, but that was her life. "Drew is not the worst person to have as your baby's father. Luke and Owen are not promised to step up, Drew will," Vanessa explained. "Have you told Tor he's the father yet?"

liaa: She nodded, "Thats fair, and at least you didnt have to lie to someone and or tell them you were wrong or something," She shrugged, "I didnt say he was, thats the issue. Hes perfect, the type to step up and actually support your decisions," She scoffed lightly, "She didnt even hear me out about sleeping with him, I dont think i can ever tell her im pregnant V," Looking at her friend with sad eyes, "It was like she was looking through me after I said it. I dont ever wanna see that look from her again,"

Vanessa: "I don't really wanna talk about Rocky's father if that's okay with you," Vanessa replied, not going too much into the subject. Her son was a sore spot for Vanessa, but the father situation was a whole different kind of pain. "Lia... You don't have to have this baby, you know that right?" Vanessa replied, her words slow so they could actually sink in. "I'm not on anyone's side! But you did sleep with her ex, you couldn't have expected her to just be calm and take that news like a champ. There's very few exes she cares about and you knew Drew was one of them..."

liaa: "Not a problem," She spoke with a nod. She knew better than to try and push Vanessa to talk about whats going on in her head. Turning towards her, a small smile, "I know. Im planning on looking at all options, even the ones that not everyone agrees with," A small shrug following her words, before she went silent. Listening to V speak, knowing she was more than correct in her words. "Its not that I expected her to be calm, but at least hear me out. She just defensive and harsh, which is fair, but i did expect some conversation about it," A small sigh as she ran her fingers through her hair, "its not like I meant to sleep with him V. I didnt hang out with him that night intending to see what his dick looked like, it just happened," Shaking her head lightly, "And I know its not an excuse, but its the truth. It wasnt planned, it wasnt like we ever intended on doing it. The plan was to be friends. Nothing more, nothing less, and now here we are,

Vanessa: "When have you ever known Tori to be much of a talker?" Vanessa replied playfully, shaking her head. "Okay ew! He's my best friend. I really really don't wanna talk about his dick! Whatever reason you had for hanging out with him is your business, but you've got to know that something was going to come from it. Drew too, but look we're not going to worry about that right now. Right now you need to get some sleep. All this worrying and back and forth isn't going to make this easier on you or really anyone involved."

liaa: "We've always been friends V, chaos comes to both of us, its enjoyable together," She shrugged, "I had never planned on being anything with him /after/ he got with Tori," She spoke, "All I know how to do is worry, especially when everything seems to be falling apart at the seams," It was true, everything she had known, was crumbling around her. Leaving her by herself in the storm, hanging onto Vanessa for dear life. "I just want it to be easier, but it wont be. And I know that,"

Vanessa: "You just gotta give her time, but you've also gotta be okay with the fact that she might never forgive you either," Vanessa explained, as much as she didn't want to think it would happen––Vanessa knew her best friend. "Whatever you decide to do, you know I'm gonna be by your side," Vanessa replied, interlocking her had with Lia's. "I wish I could tell you things are going to be easier, I really wish I could," she added softly. She'd be lying to saying anything about it, Vanessa knew /not/ knowing was always the easiest part. "It won't get better, you'll get better."

liaa: "I know, and I accept that. As much as it hurts, I know that she has that right. I betrayed her trust," She shrugged, "But shes always been there, i hate thinking about her not being here," A smile as she felt Vs hand in hers, "I appreciate you so much. For not judging more, or at least expressing it, and for being here. I know youve gone through something recently, and we dont got to talk about it. But it means something to me that your here right now," She spoke, an honest tone in her voice. "But youd be lying," She nodded, "Ive been told that for a while now. Seems like false hope,"

Vanessa: "Don't beat on yourself too much. We both know our girl can be a little dramatic," Vanessa explained. The last thing she wanted to do was be in the middle of this with all her closest friends involved, but Vanessa knew that everyone would be at each other's throats if she didn't stick her nose in it. "Lia, I got pregnant at 14 and became a teen mom at 15, I'm the last person who is ever going to judge you," Vanessa said softly, brushing a strand of hair out of Lia's face. "You know I'd be here for you baby, *but* if you do this dumb shit with Dallas I will put nair in your shampoo," Vanessa teased, wanting to lighten the situation. "You know I got you, pumpkin," she added, resting besides Lia.

liaa: "We all can be, and thats the real issue," She joked, "we all are dramatic bitches and most of the time it works for us," She knew that calling V automatically put her in the middle. It wasnt her intention, she genuinely just needed the girl. "I hope you know I understand if you decide being a part of all this drama is to much. I wouldnt be mad," She spoke, a small shrug at the end of her words, "Youre a strong person V. I know a lot of people dont tell you that, or praise you on other things. But going through what you did at that age, its tough for me now, i cant imagine three years ago," A small smile at Vanessas touch, "I would never with Dallas, hes like a big brother," She chuckled, "Can I admit something to you?" Her eyes turning to find Vanessa in the small light her side lamp gave off.

Vanessa: "I'm not dramatic! I'm just use to a certain lifestyle and anything outside that will be met with outing and tears," Vanessa joked back. She was going to be involved whether Lia called or not. "If you hadn't had called me, one of them would have." Drew would have called or even Tori. Somehow Vanessa always found out. Her head dropped somewhat, a long breath following before looking back to Lia. She didn't feel all too strong, the compliment falling somewhat on deaf ears. "Yeah, what is it?"

liaa: "Yea, not dramatic at all," She spoke sarcastically shaking her head lightly. "You arent wrong," She shrugged lightly, before her hand came up to play with my necklace. "Remember that guy i was into before tori and drew got together?" She questioned, turning slightly to look at V.

Vanessa: "Luke?" Vanessa asked raising an eyebrow. "Or does this have to do with those nice little Tiffany's necklaces you have for each day of the week?"

liaa: She chuckled lightly, "Ive always been into Luke, but its more of a sexual attraction than romantic i think," A small shrug, "And the necklaces are a whole different story for a different time," She rolled her eyes teasingly, "But seriously, again, youre the first person im admitting this to," She spoke before a deep sigh, "The guy was Drew, I had feelings for Drew. But then he got with Tori, and I distanced myself. Allowing the feelings to leave so they could be happy,"

Vanessa: "Plus Fiona would have your head if you tried anything that resembled a serious relationship," Vanessa teased. Her mouth dropped open wide, shockingly surprised at Lia's confession, though if Vanessa was using all her brain cells she could have known. "Amelia Jane Rosenburg!"

liaa: "Bitch I can take Fiona Coyne, shes not as big and bad as she pretends," She chuckled lightly, but knew that there was truth lingered within her words. No one that ends up with Luke or Fiona will compare to them for each other, and Lia wasnt gonna compete with that. "I know I know! But I did the right thing! I wasnt a bitch about it!"

Vanessa: "She will literally /buy/ you! Shit, I'd let her buy me if it weren't for her brother being the hotter Coyne," Vanessa joked. "Plus you can't fight people like Fiona Coyne, they press charges and then run to their men acting like you beat them or something then Luke's just gonna end up mad at you." She would never understand the girl's desire with the eldest Baker, but then again Vanessa's conquests never made sense either. "Did he know?"

liaa: "Yea yea yea, ive been told," She rolled her eyes, "I want to fight her. Ive wanted to for a while, not even because of whatever the fuck the relationship between me and Luke is. Shes just not a good person to me," She shrugged, "I dont think he did considering he tried to console me when it was brought up one day,"

Vanessa: "You're not fighting anyone," Vanessa replied, rolling her eyes playfully. "Do you want to be with him still? Like forget the bean in your belly and Tori, do you actually want to be with Drew?"

liaa: "I want to fight someone, but i can not right now," She spoke, a small shrug. Her eyes looking at the ceiling a she thought over vanessas question. "Yes," She answered, "Hes amazing V, in every sense. Sure hes made some dumb choices, we all have, but god that kid has a heart of gold," A sense of honesty in her tone as she spoke, "He makes the hard seem easy just by coexisting with me if I need him. Hes always willing to distract me or talk shit out with me. When weve gone out hes fought dudes for me because they cant take no," She chuckled lightly, "I want it V, i really really want it,"

Vanessa: "Then you know what you need to do," Vanessa nodded. She knew this was going to be a ride if they were to actually get together, but if Lia was happy Tori would have to come around at some point right? "My mama use to say everything's going to be okay in the end, if it's not okay.. it's not the end."

liaa: "I need to run to alaska and change my name," She spoke with an affirming head nod. Smiling at her words, "Your mom seems like a smart lady. My mom is a cunt," She shrugged with a small chuckle, "Can we just cuddle and sleep? Im done thinking about this,"

#vanessa.#barbie girl💫 plastics #tw:pregnancy

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whispersandwhiskerburn · 8 years ago

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Much Ado About SPN Results:

SPN Fanfic Writers Team Up With Shakespeare!

It’s April 23, 2017--453 years to the day since (historians believe) that William Shakespeare, one of the greatest English writers ever, was born...and 401 years to the day since the day the Bard died! :’(

However, his words live on in his plays that are performed each year, the movie adaptations, the sayings in everyday conversation...and now in Supernatural fanfiction!

When I hit 1.5k followers, I put out a rather daunting challenge to my followers: Write a Supernatural fic using a line from one of Shakespeare’s plays, and incorporate 2-3 SPN-themed words that begin with the same letter (I, like WS appreciate alliteration).

24 brave souls took on the challenge.

The results are below the read more link, along with a brief review/rec from me for each. I hope you enjoy these and take the time to share some love with the writers--this challenge was truly out of the box and they wrote some incredible things as a result.

Let the fun begin....

Thank you all for taking on this ridiculous challenge of mine. I was blown away by the submissions, and I truly hope you had as much, or at least half as much, fun writing them as I did reading them. Thank you so much!!

Fics are in alphabetical order by prompts, not by any preferences list.

“A Life I Would Have Known” by @buffylovesfoxmulder

Prompts: Anna, Angel Blade, AU (French Mistake/EndVerse) and “This above all: to thine own self be true. And it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man” (Hamlet I.3).

My Fangirling: An episode rewrite of the French Mistake where Anna subs in for a much more earnest Balthazar and the reader has a surprise up her sleeve for the Winchesters. I loved it. Lengthy, but worth the read. :)

“Wanted” by @arlaina28

Prompts: Benny Lafitte, Bunker, Brothers, “We few, we happy few, we band of brothers; for he to-day that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother” (Henry V IV.3).

My Fangirling: An absolutely lovely smut fic between Benny and the Reader that builds up in canon-style characterizations from first meeting to the “I love you” stage. An excellent read, and a brilliant use of her prompts.

*******A Fic is on the way here!!******

“Nothing Either Good or Bad” by @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog

Prompts: Donna Hanscum, Devil's Gate, Deals, and “ “There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so” (Hamlet II.2).

My Fangirling: Mimi delivered again! An angsty-suspense with flashes of fluff Donna x Dean fic around the danger of a Devil’s Gate—the one in Wyoming. I loved this fic, and it’s not even my ship, so definitely check it out….and hold onto your seat!

“The Valiant” by @littlegreenplasticsoldier

Prompts: Ellen Harvelle, EMF Reader, and “Cowards die many times before their deaths; the valiant never taste of death but once” (Julius Caesar II.2).

My Fangirling: I--I don’t know what to say here…it was beautiful and sad and it must have taken you so much time to create this, and I love it. It’s an angsty peek into Dean’s head during his time with Lisa, how he’s struggling to maintain, how he’s trying to cope with Sam’s loss—and it’s done in VERSE. You almost want to read it out loud. I just love this…and I think Shakespeare would be proud.

“Papa Don’t Preach” by @whatareyousearchingfordean

Prompts: First Blade, Fathers, “What’s gone and what’s past help should be past grief” (Winter’s Tale III.2)

My Fangirling: A Reader x Dean angst fic where she learns of a pregnancy that she hadn’t planned on and tries to explain to a Dean who worries about fatherhood. I loved the canon characterization.

*******A Fic is on the way here!!******

“All Dogs Go To Heaven” by @rachelladytietjens

Prompts: Hell Hound, Hex Bags, Heaven, and “We know what we are, but know not what we may be.” (Hamlet IV.5)

My Fangirling: With what was probably the coolest title in this challenge, she did an amazing job on this fic that had some really conflicting and challenging prompts! It’s short and sweet, with no pairing, but extremely intriguing and it raised so many questions for me. Brava!

“Not So Innocent After All” by @im-most-definitely-fangirling

Prompts: Impala (Baby), Innocence, and “If music be the food of love, play on” (Twelfth Night I.1).

My Fangirling: A body-swap fic between the Reader and Dean that reveals a lot of what they’ve been hiding from each other. I loved this—besides, where can you go wrong when you end up riding Dean on the Impala? AmIright ladies?

“Wine, Meddling, and Temptation” by @avasmommy224

Prompts: Jody Mills, John's Journal, Job (Hunting), “Tempt not a desperate man” (Romeo and Juliet IV.3).

My Fangirling: I love it! The fluff with a hint of angst and reader being besties with Jody? Brilliant! She did a great job working in ALL of the prompts and this fic is fantastic. I absolutely love Jody as a matchmaker--I can just see her worrying about finding the boys the perfect lady. :) Dean x Reader with future fun times—nothing wrong with that!

*******A Fic is on the way here!!******

“Just a Little Magic...” by @wi-deangirl77

Prompts: Meg Masters, Mark of Cain, Magic (Witchcraft), “I am one who loved not wisely but too well” (Othello V.2).

My Fangirling: I was prepared for weird when I put Mark of Cain with Meg Masters and Magic, but Jess managed a canon style fic of angsty goodness that everyone should read. It’s MOC!Dean x Reader and...oh, it’s just lovely. Go read! She says it’s the start of a new series—and I, personally, can’t wait to read it!

“Chase the Nightmares Away” by @destiel-addict-forever

Prompts: Nephilim, Naomi's Room, Nightmares, “You pay a great deal too dear for something that’s given freely” (Winter’s Tale I.1).

My Fangirling: This cute little fluffy drabble is a Daddy!Lucifer fic (not kink, reader is Luci’s kid), something I imagine we’ll see more and more of as this current series continues. I swear, when I made the prompt list and put Nephilim on it, I had no idea it would become such a big thing this year on the show! Great job.

*******A Fic is on the way here!!******

“Purple Moose, Orange Squirrel, and A Pink Dress” by @mrsbatesmotel53

Prompts: Pagan God (Not Loki/Gabriel), Pie, Pranks, “We have seen better days” (As You Like It II.7) and (Timon of Athens IV.2).

My Fangirling: I absolutely loved this! It was beautifully characterized: witty reader, western-loving Dean, sassy Rowena, protective/knowledgeable Sam….and the way you combined your prompts…I just loved it. Comedy, alternate timeline, canon style…what is not to love here?

“Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night” by @roxy-davenport

Promtps: Queen of Hell (Abaddon), Quincunx (Hoodoo symbol), Quips, and “Some rise by sin, and some by virtue fall. Some run from breaks of ice, and answer none, and some condemned for one fault alone” (Measure for Measure II.1).

My Fangirling: A rewrite of an awesome episode to include a reader insert and pairing with Crowley, this fic, like many of @roxy-davenport’s, shows a sentimental and charming side of the King of Hell in a way that even makes this Dean!Girl think fondly of the red-eyed demon. I loved the sassy way she broke down the Shakespeare quote in the fic.

“Together We Thrive” by @deansarms

Prompts: Ruby's Knife, Revenge “I burn, I pine, I perish” (Taming of the Shrew I.1).

My Fangirling: I can NOT compliment this work enough. Absolute brilliance. It’s a poem that switches from Dean’s perspective (in italics) to Sam’s perspective. It centers around the Shakespeare quote, but it provides canon accurate characterization and plot in verse form, and it….ugh, just go read it. I think I’ve reread it like five times now. ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL.

“Friendships is Constant” by @atc74

Prompts: Samuel Campbell, Sigils, Souls, “Friendship is constant in all other things” (Much Ado About Nothing, II.1).

My Fangirling: Canon-style fluff and character analysis set in season 12, Angelina used all of her prompts, and created a catch-up moment between the boys and their mother that I think we all want to see happen on the show. Short, sweet, and adorable.

“Goodnight” by @besslincoln-bruh

Prompts: Uriel, Uniforms (Outfits), Underdog, and “Strong reasons make strong actions” (King John III.4).

My Fangirling: An interesting AU with a future Dean x Reader pairing. Reader is a lawyer trying her first defense case—to prove Dean Winchester innocent when the world (and the evidence) is against him. It was hard to tear myself away from this fic, and a creative use of all the prompts. Well worth a read!

“Sweet Revenge” by @plaidstiel-wormstache

This is a completed series. The link above is to the masterlist. She wrote it at as one long one-shot with the quote at the end, but I encouraged her to make it a series--and the whole thing is fabulous.

Prompts: Vengeful Spirits, the Veil, Vessel, and “If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge?” (Merchant of Venice III.1).

My Fangirling: This friend went way above and beyond the call of duty and wrote a truly spectacular SERIES based off this prompt, with some inspiration in the form of a rather intriguing OFC. No pairing, but a beautiful use of all prompts in a canon-style fic set during John’s first solo hunt. Angst, sprinkles of fluff, some dark emotional stuff, and so much canon beauty…I love it. I don’t want to play favorites on this challenge, but this one is my favorite.

“Wrath” by @waywardjoy

Prompts: Werewolf, Wooden Stake, Wrath, and “Is this a dagger which I see before me…or art thou but a dagger of the mind, a false creation” (Macbeth II.1).

My Fangirling: Short but strong, an angsty Dean x Reader piece where you see the unbridled danger that is a wrathful Winchester. My wonderful bestie worked in all of her alphabet prompts and her Shakespeare quote brilliantly. She also helped me put this whole challenge together, so extra kudos to her. :D

“Forgotten Rituals” by @thegreatficmaster

This is a completed two-part fic. The link above is to the masterlist. Both parts are for this challenge--@thegreatficmaster took on two prompts.

Prompts: Yellow-Eyed Demon, Yarrow, Youth, Zachariah, Zoroastrian Symbol, Zenith (the most powerful time), “Hell is empty and all the devils are here” (Tempest I.2), and “Pray you now, forget and forgive.” (King Lear IV.7).

My Fangirling: Nini created a very original reader here for a story the likes of which I’ve never seen before, and doubt I will see again. Azazel x Reader, sexy times, strange magics, manipulation of time and angels, old world religions, unexpected fluff…just wow…. I won’t be forgetting this series any time soon. Great job!

This link will take you to the masterpost I made of all of my celebration challenges!

Fics still to come for this challenge:

C @bringmesomepie56, 15. “Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them” (Twelfth Night II.5).

G @therealdeanwinchester13, 10. “Lord, what fools these mortals be!” (A Midsummer Night’s Dream III.2)

K @kalliravenne, 11. “I do love nothing in the world so well as you: is not that strange?” (Much Ado About Nothing IV.2).

L @hellssarcasticqueen, 19. “The miserable have no other medicine, but only hope” (Measure for Measure III.1).

O @little-red-83, 18. “Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt” (Measure for Measure I.4).

Tagging my Forever Crowd, because you guys need to see these so very much!

@2wonderinsighlents, @adaliamalfoy, @alcpegasus22, @andrastesflamingtitties, @angelofwinchester17, @alexastacio, @anokhi07, @ariethegreat98, @arryn-nyxx, @autopistaaningunaparte, @avasmommy224, @bennyyh, @benjerry707, @bringmesomepie56, @bucky-thorin-winchester, @bulletscrossbowpie, @but-deans-back-tho, @captainemwinchester, @carry-on-ms-believer, @casownsmyass, @cfordwrites, @chaos-and-the-calm67, @dancingalone21, @d-s-winchester, @deafgirlsarecooler, @deandoesthingstome, @deanfuckingwinchesterrr, @deanscherrypie, @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog, @deanwinchesterforpromqueen, @deliciouslyshadowymilkshake, @demonangelimpala, @demondeansdomme, @end-lessnights, @faith-in-dean, @fandommaniacx, @feelmyroarrrr, @fiveleaf, @graceforme86, @i-is-for-inspiring, @ilostmyshoe-79, @impala-dreamer, @jalove-wecallhimdean, @jarpadandjensenaremyheroes, @jencharlan, @jensen-gal, @jotink78, @just-a-touch-of-sass-and-fandoms, @katnharper, @kittenofdoomage, @kristaparadowski, @lipstickandwhiskey, @littlegreenplasticsoldier, @leatherwhiskeycoffeeplaid, @love-kittykat21, @loreleilara, @lunarsaturn88, @luv4jensen, @marilynnlew, @millaraysuyai, @mogaruke, @moonstonemystyk, @mrsbatesmotel53, @mrsjohnsmith, @mrswhozeewhatsis, @mzpearlz, @nicolesyneah25, @nightmaredean, @notnatural-supernatural, @paintrider13-blog, @pinknerdpanda, @plaidstiel-wormstache, @rizlowwritessortof, @roxy-davenport, @rushernparadise, @salvachester, @septicxsoulxdarkxmind, @scorpiongirl1, @skathan-omaha, @spnrvt, @supernatural-jackles, @supernaturalyobsessed, @theafinnerup, @thegreatficmaster, @vote-for-pedro, @waywardjoy, @wevegotworktodo, @wi-deangirl77, @wonderange, @withoutaplease, @writingbeautifulmen, @xtina2191, @yoursmilemakesmeloveyou, and @yume-deaimashou

#spnfanfic #dean x reader #crowley x reader #angst #fluff #smut #masterlist #muchadoaboutspn #shakespeare meets spn #Check these out!

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antandaimee · 8 years ago

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March right into April

I’ve been meaning to record life as an engaged couple, as it has been one of the most monumental times in our lives. Unfortunately, the days haven’t been the slightest bit easy. If you really want to test a relationship, put ‘em through the wringer - and through the wringer we have gone.

Since our engagement, my head had been wrapped around all of our plans to commemorate our wedding, and to bring positive energy to the start of our marriage. With an engagement party, bachelorette/bachelor party, and wedding all wrapped up in my brain and in the making, I was incredibly busy with planning. Working full time and planning, while Anthony was studying for his professional engineering exam really left me with little time to record as I normally do. It also left with little time for me to recuperate and recharge on a daily basis.

March was supposed to be an awesome celebratory month of Anthony’s birthday. The past 3 years I’ve always tried to brew a surprise that could one up the previous year’s surprise. This year, I still managed to pull through a simple surprise - though nothing that I had imagined to do only because time and, well, life wasn’t on our side.

Foxy, Anthony’s family dog, was really sick in early March. I mean, she’d been sick all of last year because of Cushing’s Disease, but she got exponentially worse early this year. She had to take vetoryl to balance out her hormone levels. Unfortunately old age crept by her side to steal away the best of her. We found Foxy at the side of his parent’s backyard weak, cold, malnourished, laying in her wastes. It was a terrible sight. She didn’t deserve that kind of suffering. In a panic, I asked if we could take her in and bathe her. I suggested we care for her at our apartment to get comfortable while Ant and his siblings could discuss her quality of life and...well, taking all of her misery away.

It was a long weekend that had also gone by so quickly. It’s strange how terrible situations can feel like that. It was so solemn, so dark, and so lonely. What was worse was watching my rock crumble to sand at the sight of his beautiful pup withering in front of his eyes. Anthony adored Foxy. If I wasn’t in his life, then she’d be his only girl. In the same way, Foxy adored Anthony and the love and loyalty she had for him was unmistakable. Watching, hearing, and feeling his heart break over and over again throughout the weekend took pieces of me away. I felt completely helpless to ease the pain. I only knew I wanted to take care of him and his family, and help give Foxy a good, peaceful, and loving end. The emptiness from her absence hasn’t subsided, and in time we will come to accept that in may never subside.

Life didn’t stop to give us a break while we were grieving.

We found out one of our good friends was diagnosed with brain cancer, and it fucking broke our hearts. It was a long, stretched out week discovering this awful diagnosis of hers on real time. One day we’re texting each other about Title Boxing Club and she’s inquiring about what she should do about her headaches, and a couple days later I’m informed that she’s at the hospital for surgery. In disbelief, I find out the surgery is for the removal of a brain tumor.

The days that followed replay in my brain without a trigger. I was hopeful that this was the end of the alarm, and this is the last we’ll hear about the brain tumor, and she can be herself, and we can resume life as we knew it currently. We’re gonna celebrate the engagement in July together. We’re gonna go to Hawaii for the bachelorette/bachelor celebrations. We’re gonna have a kick ass time at the wedding. We’re gonna grow up together. We’re gonna grow up together. We’re gonna grow up together...right?

Not particularly so. As the days rolled on, the news got worse and worse and so did the broken pieces of my heart. It withered and dried and curled in the corners the petals of a flower snapped away from the roots that once nourished it.

The group of friends we like to call “the homies,” congregated at the hospital to hear the news she wanted to deliver. I can’t shake the image of us surrounding her hospital bed and the silence in the room. The words she said replay and replay in my mind like a broken record. There’s no exaggeration when I say that it was like a scene out of a movie. No one could believe this was happening. More days unfolded more bad news. It’s a grade iv brain tumor. There is no cure. A timeline now exists.

I didn’t know how to face reality after what we were enduring. I was crying into Anthony’s chest day after day, and going into fits of crying on my own because I couldn’t come to grips with what was going on. It had felt like someone threw a smoke bomb into my brain so I couldn’t see what was right in front of me and I was waving my arms about to fan away the clouds so I could see clearer, but I was only getting more and more sad, and more and more tired, and feeling so much more confused.

I stopped feeling like myself in all the grief, and I was snapping at the love of my life who was at a loss at what to do. He tolerated it though. All of it. My crying. My yelling. My sobbing. My fits. Even when he wanted to fall apart, he dealt with me until my emotions had subsided enough for me to get through the rest of the day or night.

It came to me in the midst of all my crying and grieving; I needed to try harder to be a better partner. I couldn’t throw these tantrums just because my whole heart and body was hurting. Certainly Anthony wasn’t responsible for my personal well-being. I needed to take a break, regroup, and find the gem in the suffering. There always is one. In fact there are many if you look hard enough. I took action to take care of myself, and I’m in the process of picking up the pieces of my heart that had scattered on the ground when it broke from all the grief.

It has made life at home with Anthony so much more pleasant, even though I’m in my own journey to persist through a really rough time in our lives. We have now decided to make the wedding a year earlier than planned, because this rude awakening has reminded us of what matters - LOVE. Love is the single most important thing in life. To be surrounded by people we love and who love us is more important than a dream ceremony and reception. You can’t take any of it for granted. Not even when it gets rough, because it’s what will pull you through.

It’s now mid-April and we’re recuperating from the heartaches, and the engaged life has been nothing short of worthwhile and perfectly imperfect. If we can get through these troublesome and heart wrenching times now, we can get through anything in our marriage.

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