#and it makes everything very uncomfy
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Does Janeys know that Brakul has a wife and son? How would he react if he learned?
He actually does know and has known pretty much from the beginning.
Early on in his stint as a POW turned mercenary, Brakul would repeatedly invoke his wife and son as reasons he could or could not do certain things + to insult Janeys like 'okay but some of us have actual, tangible responsibilities in this world and people who depend on them. Like my wife and son, who I will be returning to immediately when my contract is over. You're never going to see me again. On account of my wife and son.'
When he started actually Liking Janeys and wanting to be with him, and seeing a chance to Avoid All Consequences And Never Go Back Home, he gradually reversed course (and attempted to rationalize it to himself) like "Ahhh they'll be fine. I mean everyone probably thinks I'm dead and/or an oathbreaker anyway so Sirudan's gotta be remarried by now. My brother probably got in on that, and he really has his shit together so they're in good hands. Honestly it will be worse for them if I go back. They're better off without me. They're fine. It's not a big deal. I'm soooooo single and unattached btw" And Janeys was like "Okay. Yay."
13 years down the line Janeys almost never thinks about it and when he occasionally remembers it's like
He does not give a shitttt about the wife/child abandonment angle whatsoever, but he's aware that Brakul still has some attachment to them and regrets over skipping out, and he's kind of insecure about it. The concept of Brakul having a child out there completely independent of their whole Thing also makes him uncomfortable in ways he can't really put his finger on. He's not actually scared that Brakul will return to his ex-wife though, like even with all his profound insecurities and abandonment issues he knows there's not a chance in hell that he's gonna actually attempt to make amends. Bottom line is he doesn't like to think about it, and mostly doesn't have to.
#Hibrides found out about his Abandoned Wife And Child while she was first pregnant and after their relationship had begun to sour#and Will Not let him forget it#She doesn't honestly give a shit about them either it's not really out of concern for the people he left behind but#more a way of Very directly confronting his avoidant tendencies (and also just an easy way to emotionally wound him)#Like she sees him as someone who will do everything in his power to avoid discomfort and the consequences of his choices and#then has the audacity to whine and mope about how guilty he feels. And then will make excuses if confronted.#And Janeys coddles and enables him like 90% of the time so he just keeps doing it. Which is absolutely infuriating to her.#(Her perception is pretty spot on btw it's just Occasionally applied unfairly to situations where he was actually a victim)#So being like 'hey how about the wife and child you abandoned huh. You gonna do that again when things get uncomfy?' gets#through to him. And making him actually acknowledge it or at least feel really fucking bad about it is like. emotionally satisfying#I want to be clear that she has the least control of her circumstances of the three and the vast majority of my authorial#sympathies but I just didn't want to write her as an absolute righteous perfect perma-victim.#So when I describe her doing stuff out of vindictiveness or occasional straight up cruelty it's not like 'she is a bitch' I just want#her to be like. a full human being who shouldn't have to be 100% innocent and devoid of malice in her circumstances to be#sympathetic.#Which I think Should be clear but the whole situation is one that like. In a fandom context would ABSOLUTELY get warped into#her being an Unsympathetic Mean Bitch while her associated gayboys get to be Sympathetic And Nuanced
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it would be really funny if i never took the “I’M NOT GRIFFIN MCELROY!!!” out of my bio when i changed my url
#it was never my intention for people to think i was actually him#i was posting a lot of mcelroy content at the time and it kept the theme of my previous urls#i have a feeling griffin knew about me tho bc in one episode of something i don’t remember what#he said ‘go the tumblr route and remove the vowels’#which is literally what i did#but also i have paranoia that everyone knows everything about me so i could very well me wrong LMAO#anyway. i hope i didn’t make him uncomfy if he did know lol#that’s why i changed it. felt weird having a real persons name as my url at the age i was#anywayyyyy#blah blah#i like my url now#eventually i think i wanna find one that Really feels like Me but this is a good placeholder
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i think we should start reversing the DV stats around sports. ladies, please start beating the men in your lives over sports. we need to do this. for equality
#also i just hate sports buzzers like please stop subjecting me to sports buzzers#no hate to female athletes or female sports fans i respect you#full hate to my father tho watch the fucking game in your bedroom and not the living room where i sleep/have space for my computer#like… you have the privilege of a bedroom bro please use it instead of condemning me to wander until sports conclude in like 4 hours#also worth mentioning no one is watching the TV in the main living area. he chose the secondary living area (my designated area)…#like he could’ve picked either the truly undesignated common room OR his designated bedroom but he had to choose MY designated couch… bro.#i’m not going to beat him bc he would probably beat me back harder which would suck. plus he lowkey has alzhiemer’s/dementia#so idk how well he considers anything in general but like… he consistently chooses the most inconvenient & annoying course of action#for everything. i dont even make myself anything more complicated than a fried egg or grilled cheese bc of the way he’s gotta appear#out of nowhere. and stand in front of every cabinet or the fridge exactly when i need something. and then just stares at me until i’m done.#if’s very unnerving like i hate to say so but his presence deeply unnerves me. even tho he doesnt even yell at me anymore.#he just has uncomfy vibes idk
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I hate being surrounded by neurotypicals.. (my family)
#ok seriously though like..#whenever i show like any traits of autism my mom and her bf always look at me super weird#or I ask a question that makes sense to ask and then go “...okay?” or “..no?”#like.. idk does anyone understand what im saying here#do u guys see it#my aunt and my cousin are nd and they're very very fun !! but erm.. my mom on the other hand...uhmmmm#idk it makes me uncomfy! I should be able to like.. idk. be able to act like Myself around them but#I get ostracised for everything I do pretty much that shows it so#negative post#kinda ? idk#I absolutely hate the way some neurotypicals look @ neurodivergent people; people look at me like im insane almost#I fucking hate having to fit the standard of normalized human behavior that I can't fit into!! Fuck this gay earth
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i need a group socialisation-based hobby that gets me out of the house but they all cost money
#not an option!#i don't even know what i would do if i did have the money to attend some kind of hobby#i'm not really physically capable#everything online is like 'go to the gym or go to yoga classes or biking'#no. i need you to understand that i will not be doing that.#i guess there's the lgs but i feel like i would need to dress up as a boy to not end up having to stop going again#and lgs always feel like they already have very integrated communities that have gone for years#but even if i did go i would have to buy some kind of tcg deck or something#and then it would be wasted if i got scared off by not integrating or by someone making me uncomfy#anyway it all costs money so it's not worth thinking about but. i wish it was#puri rambles#the last time i did anything was group sewing lessons like 9 years ago but that cost a LOT of money if you wanted to#keep attending after the initial trial#it was really nice though#and had like an actual tangible result to take home with me
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Hi V! You don’t have to answer this if it makes you uncomfy but could you maybe elaborate on the pr0ship part of your pinned post? /genq /nm I’m just super curious what your stance is on the topic and what you’re uncomfy with :0
Hi anon! This is a perfectly fine question to ask since you’re being reasonable and polite lol. But basically, I’m extremely uncomfortable with lots of problematic media. I can’t stomach most dead dove content and I generally block people over it if it happens to pop up on my timeline.
For example, lots of the “dark romance” books people over on TikTok and Instagram enjoy are things that leave me disgusted and even physically sick. But I won’t exactly voice that disgust in public nor would I like… harass or shame anyone over it unless they were a genuine threat to real people (and even then, I still won’t harass them since that would put me at risk. I’d probably just bring awareness and be like “hey, maybe stay away from this person” and leave it there).
I just like to mind my own business and curate my own experience, you know? Since engaging in shit that makes me sick will only make me feel worse. There are tags and a block button for a reason, use them and make your experience online better! /gen
And this isn’t even taking into consideration that “problematic” as a scale differs from person to person. I can stomach portrayals of dark topics if they’re not romanticized but some may not be the same and that’s fine.
I just added that portion to my pinned to make people aware of my stance. So if you happen to be on any side and you make me uncomfortable, you’ll know the reason why I blocked you. Whenever I block people, there’s no harsh feelings about it (unless, again, you’re actually a shit person). I just block freely to make a safe space for me and yeah :]
This is a very nuanced topic that deserves lots of care and energy. Care that I do have, but energy I don’t have enough of. It’s draining and I honestly have better things to do
#꒰ v’s answered asks ꒱#lowkey had to edit a bit of the pinned post because of this question LOL#pleaseee do not put me into any label when it comes to this discussion#I just really wanna distance myself away from shipping discourse since everything about it makes me uncomfy#I don’t agree with harassing people#but I also don’t like dark media that’s portrayed to be romanticized or sexualised#I guess I’m kinda just immune to the discourse due to being on AO3 a lot y’know? /hj#I’ve been conditioned to just block and move on#and it’s honestly very healthy to do that IMO#It’s just me setting a boundary. That’s all :P#I hope this wasn’t worded badly otherwise my ass is going to be labeled as a bad guy for no reason again 💀#I keep editing this to add mor stuff#I’m gonna stop now
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I KNOW IM YOUR FAVORITE, gojo satoru ཐི♡ཋྀ

ᖭི༏ᖫྀ in which: he may be your ex, but that doesn’t mean you can just move on.
ᖭི༏ᖫྀ wc: 2.9k words.
ᖭི༏ᖫྀ warnings: lots of angst, dark content (not really), sexual content, pussy!drunk gojo, stalker!gojo, heavy possessiveness, mentions of violence, pet names, daddy kink, heavy breeding kink, baby trapping (but y/n wants it), gojo sucks ur feet for literally 1 second, yandere gojo (ehh), cunnilingus, overstimulation, toxic!gojo (barely), ex!gojo, and etc.
ᖭི༏ᖫྀ notes: okay look this shit is very freaky, and it’s loosely based on the song hold me down by daniel caesar! and gojo is a stalker y’all, this is your only warning babes.. please leave now if you’re uncomfy! he is kinda crazy in this but in a lovingly way.. y’know? not proofread either so not too much on me!

when you walked into your apartment you couldn’t help the exaggerated giggles you let out. it was embarrassing actually, acting like a school girl in junior high all over again. the reason for your happiness was pretty simple— you just had your first date.
your first date since you broke up with your ex, gojo.
that was about a year ago now.. a year since you and the love of your life parted ways. up until recently you’ve never had the guts to put yourself out there again, always scared that one day you’ll just end up hurt again.
but your whole view on dating changed when you met this guy at a grocery store. he offered to pay for your entire cart, and it was well over $300 worth. you found the gesture sweet, and from there you two exchanged numbers.
he was no gojo of course, but you had to move on at some point. it’s already been a year, if gojo didn’t reach out yet, then maybe that meant he’d moved on too.
well.. so you thought.
you were so caught up in the excitement from how well your date went, you barely even realized you were still in pitch black.
“fuck i got so distracted i forgot to turn the lights on.” you chuckled to yourself, flipping the light switch on and hanging your purse on the door.
you didn’t know why but you had a feeling you weren’t alone, like someone was watching you— or better yet breathing right down your neck.
the house was eerily quiet, so quiet you could hear the drop of a pen. but something felt off about your apartment, and you were never one to ignore your instincts.
just as you were about to retreat and run out the door, a familiar voice had you stopping in your tracks.
no. fucking. way.
“where were you?” the achingly familiar man smiled, trying his best to hide the dangerous aura oozing from his body. he knew exactly where you were, and always have. you didn’t know it yet— but he’d been watching you for a while now. ever since you dumped him which was more than a year ago now.
technically it was stalking.. but he didn’t like to call it that. in his mind, he was more of a guardian angel— just making sure you’re okay and still breathing.
how else would he check on you since you blocked him on everything else?
the white haired man was sitting on your couch with his head tilted— clearly waiting for an answer although he already knew where you were to begin with. it was pretty easy to keep tabs on you.
you stared at him, a small frown forming across your face. you were feeling weak in the knees. the first thing you wanted to do was jump on him and tell him how much you missed him.
but you knew you couldn’t do that, not anymore. the two of you just didn’t go together, or at least that’s how you felt a year ago. you couldn’t get back with him, you wouldn’t. no matter how much it hurt.. it was better than dealing with his unstability.
“what are you doing in my house, gojo?” you folded your arms— staring back at him with the same expression he was giving you. that’s what he loved about you, you weren’t easy.
with the blink of an eye, he was up from the couch and coming closer towards you. the man easily towered over you so to say he was intimidating was an understatement.
instead of answering your question he just stared at you with a blank expression— and you did the same exact thing. this was common with you two, just staring at each other in silence until one of you dared to speak up.
about five minutes later, gojo finally cracked. you silently praised yourself for being able to last longer than him.
with a low chuckle, he shook his head— slightly licking over his lips. “i think im the one asking the questions here, hm? so answer me.”
you scoffed at his arrogance, seems like some things just never change. “i was on a date if you must know, now get the hell out of my house.”
as soon as you got your words out he couldn’t help but to laugh. honestly, gojo didn’t even know what was so funny, maybe it was the way you said it.. you really thought you held some type of authority?
“and now you’re laughing at me? what’s so funny?”
that only made him laugh more, truth be told gojo wasn’t even trying to laugh, but you trying to be somewhat “mean” was taking him out because you were nothing like that.
you were one of the kindest people he’d ever met, so this little act you had on was amusing to him.
“shit, im sorry!” he clutched his stomach, letting one last chuckle out before continuing. “it’s just.. you really think im falling for this little act of yours?”
your face was quick to scrunch up— finding every bit of his words disrespectful. but it was gojo, so what could you really expect? his bluntness would probably be the death of him.
“excuse me? need i remind you, we are not together anymore gojo!” your voice came out a lot shakier than you’d hoped for it to. what the hell was going on with you?
“well clearly i know that, or else i’d go and kill that fucker you were out with tonight.”
throwing your hands in the air you muttered a strand of curse words, it’s impossible to get through to someone as hard-headed as him. “please just see yourself out.”
before he could respond, you walked off toward your room. you didn’t have the energy to deal with him or his childish antics, he’d already managed to ruin your entire mood. all this did was remind you why you keep your heart locked away— because of arrogant assholes like him.
“there’s no need to be rude, y’know? i just wanna talk to my favorite girl.” gojo followed you to your room— just like you knew he would. god, he’s so annoying.
it looked the exact same as the last time he was here except for the empty wall where the pictures of him used to hang. he’d be lying if he said it didn’t make his chest heavy, and heart pang in sorrow. could you really have been done with him for good this time?
“whatever, just don’t get on my bed.. i don’t know where you’ve been.”
‘stalking you’ he chuckled to himself before completely disregarding your request, and plopping down on your bed anyways.
you decided not to scold him for doing exactly what you said not to do. that’s just who gojo was, no one could boss a man like him around.
you weren’t even being serious either. in hindsight, you really did enjoy having him around. as much as you hated to admit it.. it reminded you of the old times, when it was just you and him against the whole world.
“i missed you, y’know? you just up and left without a word.. and next thing i know im blocked.” even though he tried to hide it you could hear the pain in his voice. losing you was like losing a piece of him too, he couldn’t stand it. he couldn’t stand the way you made him feel.
the only reason the man was able to keep it together was because he was watching you, ensuring you weren’t completely out of his life.
it sounded crazy. hell— it was crazy, but when it came to you he’d do anything.
“i know.. & im sorry for the way i handled that. i just felt like we needed to move on, try new things…”
“i don’t want to try new things!” he scowled, quickly sitting up from the bed to face you. “i want you.. just you. that’s all i’ve ever wanted.”
the air was thick, and the room felt like it was caving in. your body was practically on fire listening to him say the words you’d been craving to hear.
“and about that date of yours..” he cooed, running his hands up your thighs and slowly spreading them. “we won’t be worrying about him anymore, will we?”
that little date was never a threat to gojo to begin with. both you and him knew that, but he took manners into his own hands just to mark his territory.
gojo made sure to corner the poor guy as soon as your date was over, and needless to say.. a few threats were all it took. you should be happy he didn’t do worse, it ran across his mind to kill the poor guy at first.
“i..if we do this then no more bullshit okay?” your soft hands gripped his chin as you forced his beautiful blue eyes to meet yours. “none of that childish stuff this time. we’re both grown so we need to act like it, we’ve had a whole year to fix ourselves.”
every time the two of you got back together it turned into complete chaos. gojo wasn’t the best man out there, and you weren’t the best woman. both of you had your own flaws regardless, but you two needed each other.
that was well established the first 10 times you guys broke up, and unsurprisingly you always ended up back in each other’s skin.
gojo’s gaze on you was heavy, almost as if he was trying to study your every breath and blink. all of the dumb, childish expressions on his face from before were far gone.
“yes princess, whatever you want.” he softly spoke as he sunk his head into the skin of your stomach, littering you with soft kisses. “i’ll do whatever you want..”
gojo spoke so gently— his voice softer than ever as he pushed you on your back, wrapping your legs around his shoulders.
you stared at him intently, waiting to see what he would do next. one thing about gojo was he always had something up his sleeve, and part of you knew where this was headed.
when his rough hands gripped the waistband of your flimsy skirt, you didn’t complain. actually you found yourself wanting more, longing for more.
“y’gonna let me get a taste baby? missed her s’much,” soft lips trailed up your thigh— leaving small bite imprints on the flesh. this was his way of staking his claim on you, marking you as his and only his.
you couldn’t stop the shaky sigh that fell from your lips, or the silent nod you gave to your ex-boyfriend for him to continue.
the grin that spread across his face was taunting almost, and intimidating. when that skirt of yours was out of the way, gojo moved on to the black-lace panties. his personal favorite.
“so what, you wearin’ these for other people now?” the fucking nerve of you, he couldn’t believe this. to stoop that low.. well that just won’t do. it seems like he had a few things to correct now that he was back. “fuckin’ answer me. be a good girl for me, yeah?”
your eyes locked with his and all you saw was silent fury, you could tell he was pissed. “not wearing them for anybody toru. just didn’t have any clean ones,”
a lazy grin covered his face at the remembrance of his old nickname, the way it fell from your lips so softly always managed to send heat straight to his dick.
he finally got his girl back.
faint kisses to your cunt had your legs shaking in anticipation— and the soft gasp that left your lips did nothing but egg gojo on as his tongue met your aching clit.
“pussy’s still fuckin’ pretty as ever,” with a low voice his eyes were closed shut, in hopes to savor every last bit of you. when his hands came up to your thighs he couldn’t resist the urge to spread them even further.
the man wanted to explore every inch of you since it’s been so long. so so long since he’s spent some personal time with that pretty pussy of yours.
“w..wait- fuck toru!” you whined when his lips found their way to your pulsing clit, folding his tongue up and down the gooey slit.
his assault to your pussy didn’t stop there. next his thumb was sliding down your sticky folds, not stopping until it was past your tight walls.
your mouth fell open at the intrusion. his thumb wasn’t long but it was thick, causing a bigger stretch than you’d expected.
“so good. taste’s s’good princess,” gojo mindlessly babbled, every word sending vibrations straight to your pussy.
gojo felt like he was out of his body. out of his mind, and he hadn’t even been inside you yet. just what the fuck were you doing to him?
finally fed up with the throbbing ache in his pants he latched onto your clit for a third time, giving it one last kiss before pulling away.
the man couldn’t wait any longer— he needed to be inside you, and he needed it now. before you knew it he was sliding off his sweats and everything underneath it, leaving him completely exposed.
your pussy throbbed just from the sight of him.. you didn’t know how much longer you could wait either.
“don’t worry mama, im ready for ya’.” a low chuckle left his throat when he saw you were just as desperate as him. “you ready for me?”
his blue eyes met your low ones when he slapped his tip against your folds. next he was sliding inside of your pulsing hole with ease, forcing your mouth open.
“o..oh my gosh!“ you winced at the familiar stretch, your walls involuntarily clenched around his dick— trying to push him out.
“n..no- fuck. none of that, y’hear me?” gojo whimpered at the feel of being squeezed, he couldn’t even move you were squeezing him so tight.
the man hovered over you, lips grazing your ear as he coaxed you. “let me in baby, you can do it. i know you can,” he whispered, wrapping his hand around your neck and resting it there.
his words of encouragement had you opening up quicker than he expected, and with every second he was inching deeper into your pussy. gojo felt like he was in a dream— or better yet, on cloud 9. after all that time you still feel the exact same, heavenly.
his strokes were gentle at first, but they sped up when he realized how long he was away from you. a whole year.. never again.
“n..never ever gonna let you keep this shit from me again.” gojo groaned with an edge in his voice that you couldn’t recognize.
your shaky hands wasted no time sliding under his shirt, feeling on the happy trail that covered his v-line. “not gonna take it away toru, ‘s all yours!”
gojo grinned at your words as he pressed onto your lower stomach. with his free hand he gripped onto the back of your thighs and brung your freshly done feet up to his mouth.
his lips wrapped around your toe— eyes locking with yours as he sucked on it. his strokes only got deeper, and you whimpered at all the different sensations at once.
“‘m not gonna pull out,” he admitted as he switched from sucking to leaving small kisses on your foot. “gonna cum so deep in this pretty pussy. never gonna leave me again.”
you were so out of it. drool everywhere, hair messy, tear stained cheeks.. anything gojo said went in one ear and out the other. the man could do whatever, you didn’t care.
“mm yes, don’t pull out. want it s’bad, fill me up please!” small whines filled your throat when you felt a familiar pressure in your abdomen, your pussy wrapping around him even tighter than before. how was this even possible?
gojo’s pace got faster, strokes sloppier.. he was slowly but surely losing all the sense of control he once had before. “f..fuckk ‘m gonna cum toru, so close!”
you gasped when his thumb flicked your clit, looking up at the blue eyes that never left your frame. your legs shook in overstimulation and you didn’t know how much longer you could hold it in.
“let it out mama, you’re okay. gimme all of it- shit.” he hissed as his dick twitched at how tight you were squeezing. “fuck fuck fuck, you’re gonna be such a pretty mama. s..such a pretty wifey, all f’me.”
you threw your head back as chills covered your entire body. the both of you were completely out of touch with reality, not caring about anything but the feeling of one another.
“‘m cumming toru! mhmm ‘m cumming,” you exclaimed, bringing your hand to his stomach. it wasn’t long before the built-up pit in your stomach finally snapped, coating his dick in a ring of your juices.
gojo was close behind you, a whimpering mess as his stomach tightened. before he knew it he was filling you up— spilling his load inside of you, not a drop to be wasted.
“f..fuck yeah. take it mama, it’s all yours. all for you.. gotta give you everything.” he chanted praises as he gave you one last stroke, pushing his cum even deeper into you where it belonged.
your voice was shaky when he called you, so shaky that at first you thought you wouldn’t be able to respond. but even so, you did.
“you’re never leaving me again, understand?” the edge in his voice was back, and you’d be lying if you said it didn’t make your stomach do flips.
“yes toru, i understand.”
if there’s anything you learned from this at all.. it’s that you could never leave a man like gojo satoru.

©rissouu 2025 (this one’s for dulce y’all so thank her, it took me forever *sigh*)
#malora’s works!#gojo satoru#gojo x reader#gojo satoru smut#satoru gojo smut#gojo satoru x reader#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen one shot#gojo one shot#gojo smut#jjk smut#jjk fluff#jjk angst#jujutsu kaisen fluff#jujutsu kaisen angst#ex!gojo satoru#yandere!gojo satoru#gojo satoru x you#jjk x self insert#gojo satoru x reader smut#satoru gojo x reader smut#gojo#satoru gojo#jjk
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no one needs to read this i’m just talking into the universe tbh
#the last 5 days have been soooo strange for me cause in this middle ground of like being OK and like Not At All Able to Cope and it’s very#uncomfy for me if im being honest#so much joy has happened (finding our cute little stray dogs being with friends etc) but also there’s just an underlying feeling of stress#and Tired with everything I do and it’s so difficult for me to just live in like this cause it rly getting in the way of all the progress#i’ve had this year cause it’s really genuinely out of my control#i’m at a point where i’m finally like in tune with my body and myself and i’m getting so much better about boundary setting but when these#situations come up i feel it unwinding the progress i’ve made bc i feel invalidated in my needs of that makes sense#idk what to do from here but i’m trying to get another therapy appt in soon so we can try to talk this out with someone who can actually#like help not just my friends going ‘it’ll be fine stop stressing’#which i know is good intentioned but rly doesn’t help At All#z rambles
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Hey, sorry if you’ve been asked this before, but I have ADHD and I’ve been following your comic for years and just now have started to write my own comic (partially because you really inspired me). But I’m really struggling with staying on the project even when it’s boring and getting myself to work on it in the first place. Do you have any tips on how to keep your brain invested or just to make yourself do the work at all?
I have excellent news, I literally just figured out something really important about this.
So when you're an ADHD kiddo or otherwise have difficulty staying on task in a structured environment where Task is the Priority, the main way people try to MAKE you stay on task is by removing your access to anything that is not The Task. No phone, no TV, no doodling, no going outside, etc. In practice, this just makes us miserable because it takes the boredom that's always simmering around a 2 or 3 and cranks it all the way up to 11. In the same way that you would have difficulty staying on task if you were in physical pain, this crushing existential monotony makes it very difficult to work. The work might get done simply because you have no other options, but it will not be done quickly or well, and it will take a while to recover from how much it hurt.
What I realized earlier this week is I caught myself doing this to myself. I had 42 pages of background colors to do, and I thought to myself "this sounds really tedious, but I suppose I have nothing better I can do." And I realized what I'd just thought, and got very alarmed.
Because back when I was an ADHD kiddo imprisoned by school scheduling and a million little factors that keep children immobile and restrained, I couldn't stop thinking about how big and exciting the world was, and how much I wanted to be anywhere but here. When I was feeling really crushed in I'd pick a random spot on the maps on my wall and just imagine being there instead of my bedroom. This was the impetus behind almost all of my creative energy. I've said it before - anything is a prison if you can't leave, and being in a prison makes it easy to imagine how amazing things could be outside of it. Aurora's initial worldbuilding was forged in the crucible of fifth grade misery. My enthusiasm for art and my creative drive are inextricable from my sense of wonder and yearning for excitement in the real world. Not escapism, but appreciation. Wonders unimaginable are out there, and I gain just as much joy seeking them out as I do conjuring them up in my head and sharing them with all of you.
So now that I'm a grown-up with actual freedom in every way I've been able to get, the idea that I was staying on task by making myself believe the world was small and not worth seeing was extremely alarming. It could keep me on task for an afternoon, but at the cost of slowly extinguishing the thing that made me want to make art in the first place - the hunger to experience and draw inspiration from all the myriad complexities in the world.
So what I've been doing is I've been purposefully and intentionally taking excursions whenever I catch myself thinking "I could take a break but it wouldn't be worth it, it's the same outdoors as always, I'll be uncomfy and unproductive and tired." Because that is never true. Every time I've put down the stylus and gone out, I've been renewed in one way or another, and when I come back to comfort fully recharged I get a lot of shit done. Because it is easier to work on anything if you remember why you wanted to make it in the first place, and it is self-defeating misery to just lock yourself in with it and tell yourself you're a bad person if you can't get it done.
I honestly don't know how widely applicable this is. I have worse wanderlust than anyone I know, so for me this has always been modeled as imprisonment vs freedom. I've also been extremely lucky to find myself in a profession that lets me set my own pace on literally everything I do. But I genuinely believe that when it comes to making art with ADHD, you need to give yourself freedom to move laterally, not just in the direction of obvious forward progress. We don't think linearly in any other part of our lives - art is no different.
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the uk's supreme court ruling is just the most insane thing ever these people are freaks. not ONCE in any of the bbc articles do they mention at all what they actually mean by 'biological sex' but im guessing they mean pussy . so . u want my big muscular hairy 100% 'passing' ftm bf in ur changing room?? in ur bathrooms?? would that make u feel comfy and safe??????? like they constantly leave out trans men of this argument most likely bc they know what adding them in completely dissolves their entire argument its so funny
and these arguments and "facts" are just not based in any sort of reality at all . like . what? all trans women are actually men and the reason why theyre doing all that is so they can infiltrate womens spaces to assault them? tfw ur a man and u want to assault a women but th door she went through has a little stick figure in a dress on it so u go 'damn' and walk away sadly. like. GIRLS. completely not only just disregarding any statistics that prove this is not in fact happening, or at the very least not happening to the degree they act like it is, but also ignoring the fact completely that women are very capable of assaulting women!! like that happens!!! women are not these perfect untouchable always-the-victim creatures . they're just people!! and all people are capable of evil!! trans, cis or otherwise!! YES men are more likely to assault women than any other group of people, but that is not because they are men and were born with evil in their hearts, its because of the way boys are raised and how normalised misogyny is in our society!!!!! by making everything about biology u completely disregard this fact, which both removes blame from the men who do assault women AND does nothing to help solve the social issues which cause this to happen in the first place!!! girls you are so weird!!!!!!!!
FUTHERMORE! im sorry but if u have intense trauma so bad that you cant spend any amount of time in the presence of man, that is ur problem to heal. you cannot expect the world to mold itself around YOUR trauma and triggers. it is your responsibility to keep yourself safe. just because u dont like something or something makes u uncomfy it doesnt give you the right to just campaign it out of existence sorry !
all my lovely uk trans women ESPECIALLYYYY my poc trans women i love you so so much you deserve the everything and the world is better and brighter with you in it!! one day everyone will see that and it will be a kinder existence for everyone because of it <33333 i love u so so much everything will be okay one day bc we will make it okay i prommy
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❝ 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐦 𝐈 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 ? ❞
🌊✨𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐢
⤥ self image ⤦
You are transitioning into a new stage of life & maturity. Some of you could be entering your Saturn return or entering into a Saturn transit. So this would be my Aries people. Which makes sense, because you the main idea that came to my mind here was self image. The emperor reversed did show up, so it really weaves that together. It seems like you have not always been confident, or felt that you had the vitality to stand on your authority. You could have been undermined in some way, or possibly even released some kind of authority position. You may have also released possessive, stingy, immature, & self centered behaviors. You have transformed a lot, and I sense that this group is rather manipulative because that word keeps coming up. You may be learning more how to use these skills to your benefit and not your detriment, you’ve always been very crafty and I see that this will pay off for you. There may be more fertility and abundance entering your life, you’re being asked to put more effort into something. Perhaps an idea or a concept. You’re being given opportunity to make something super unique, so you need to hop on that quick. Push for something greater, and I heard something about unification or reunification.
A change in outlook regarding a relationship, partnership, goal, or even a deal could occur. I don’t see it being bad per se, I do sense some tension and anxiety- but overall I’d say that you should be good. I am seeing snake imagery, but I do see that something about you is divinely protected. I keep envisioning snakes in the grass biting someone’s ankles, just step carefully- I’m thinking of a minefield. Something is about to blow up, and you have to move carefully to avoid collision. If you think quick and react without hesitation you should be able to avoid conflict. I sense that you may be experiencing some form of hesitation and I think your spirits are warning you to slow your role. Take time sowing your seeds, & remember that the here and now is very potent for you.
I see a significant change coming into your self concept. You are going to be more “strict” about things, potentially seeing a shift in approach to an issue or situation. I’m seeing suits and ties- business people & shit. It’s like a group of people in a meeting. You could be sharing or contributing ideas to a group. So perhaps your contributions or approaches will become more solid. You will have more to offer as a companion, business partner, etc- or perhaps you’re starting to understand your strengths and weaknesses which is allowing you to become a better business partner. I keep hearing business partner.
Someone may gift you something soon as well, potentially a ring or bracelet.
🐚✨ 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐢𝐢
⤥ Imbalances ⤦
ᓚᘏᗢ : 🗯🎧 3005 by Childish Gambino is a song I channeled for this pile. Y’all are special and get a channeled song don’t tell p1 & 2 🤫🤐
So yeah, I feel like y’all are learning the value of relationships and how to be better in your relationships. Perhaps you’ve usually been on the receiving end of halfassed love & through negative experiences began to believe that effort wasn’t worth it in relationships. You could’ve become colder, more unsettled, and confused af. You’re currently finding clarity and you are learning where you start and other people begin. Could have Neptune in 7H or opposite descendant. It’s like you’re learning what reciprocity is about- you’re realizing where you fall short and picking up the slack. Perhaps you’ve realized conflict is not entirely avoidable- and that doing everything you can constantly to avoid it is hurting you and NOT helping you. You’re learning how to really RESOLVE conflict, and how to communicate effectively and advocate for peace and harmony in your relationships. The bigger picture is being revealed to you.
There were a lot of chaotic, confusing, & uncomfy situations that transpired over the last few years that are going to start adding up. You’re going to understand the purpose these experiences brought as you re-enter a state of experimentation in life. You might rekindle some old friendships or relationships, or you could be communicating with past people. Someone wants to show you something, or help you find something. I see you becoming more aware of your actions & the impact you have on others. You could assume that you are not as impactful as you actually are. People remember you, & you may start to realize that. Your impact is also more positive than you think, people really respect & admire you- this will be made abundantly clear. Someone could even be speaking on your behalf or defending you behind closed doors.
Your true feelings, & where you’ve secretly become numb. I see you being challenged to overcome this numbness, to bring life back into your heart. You sometimes can be so closed off and cold that others can’t seem to reach you. Someone could be helping you overcome this or notice it. You may not be as emotional as you think- perhaps just easily triggered. Perhaps you’re rediscovering a sense of “numbness” which comes naturally to you- being less invested in emotion & emotional expression. Becoming more logically minded and focusing on results & numbers.
You’re becoming aware of the logistics, numbers, & actions needed to create harmony & attain a specific desire. Something is being made accessible to you, just within reach- however you’ll need to be creative to fully grasp it. Don’t be nervous; your mind is perfectly attuned to receiving this thing. Get into your flow while allowing the path to be revealed. Sometimes darkness is the key to the light. Perhaps dreams, feathers, cameras, the color gold, solar energies, or beaches are somehow relevant. I also keep seeing crows. This is a very visual/audio vibe kind of group. Not only did you get channeled images and concepts but a song. Perhaps your spirits communicate with you through images & songs.
If you’re interested in exploring divination you could start with shufflemancy- perhaps writing concepts on paper as well and scooping them out of a bowl or holder to get your messages.
🪸✨ 𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐢𝐢𝐢
⤥ effort ⤦
To be honest it seems like you don’t put in as much effort as you should to become an authority or master like you desire to be. some of you could be realizing perhaps that you aren’t as much of a master as you initially assumed & that you jumped the gun about something. You’re learning that deceptive or halfassed effort can have consequences- you may have taken on too much authority or have positioned yourself as a figure of authority when it wasn’t appropriate. This could be in work, school, relationships, etc- I feel like you are going to be making a decision that you thankfully do have the tools to make. You could be considering speaking out about something, or perhaps defending yourself regarding something. You need to stop sitting & thinking about what you want & start putting in effort. You’re becoming aware of your lack of effort and consistency. You are learning from your pain, heartache, etc that you experienced which took you in a different life direction unexpectedly.
You’re being made aware of the fact that you have an opportunity for redemption of this mistake; alternatively you’re being offered an opportunity to better or improve something & being reoffered a position or connection to a community. Perhaps you’re being forgiven, or you are turning the odds in your favor. Your past experiences of exile or rejection have led you to understand so much more about life & what it has to offer. A new cycle is starting, & in this cycle you will be rectifying harm that was caused unfairly. You will be healing people, situations, etc-
my advice for some who are just now realizing that they have mispositioned themselves. Take a step back. Consider how you got here, what actions you took, what contributed externally and internally- how you can assure that you won’t allow this to happen again. Be humble enough to accept redirection, & understand that intelligence doesn’t mean constantly being right. You may not have given as much as you were receiving, or contributing out of vanity or greed. Perhaps you are reconnecting with a version of yourself that is more idealistic and creative. I see you expressing a lot of ideas or becoming aware of a new desire. A new outlook, something is really changing in your desires tbh. The fact that consistency and quality is more important than having something to offer at a moments notice. Even if it takes you longer or becomes a slower process you’ll start to realize the value in taking your time. You sometimes don’t see your reactivity, egotism, or emotional immaturity. It seems like you are going to become aware of the fact that you sometimes allow your ego’s wounds to guide you. You’re learning how to be more stable and secure in the way that you take care of & contribute to yourself and others.
#tarot community#tarot online#tarot reading#pick a card#pac#pick a pile#tarotblr#pick a picture#pac tarot#tarotonline#tarotcommunity#tarot witch#free tarot#daily tarot#tarot cards#tarot#tarot deck
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. . . fred weasley with it girl veela girlfriend (you, bitch!)
babe.
he is your biggest fucking fan
drooling and wide eyes when he even HEARS the click of ur cunty shoes xxx
genuinely stand by the fact he has shirts with ur face on
to him, you’re everything & more
no1 advocate for anything you do
‘yeah, love, you should do that. definitely’
‘mhmm, anything you want darling’
GRRRRRRRR 🐱🐱🐱🐱
eats up every single one of ur cunty fits
you look so damn good babe and he makes sure you know it
‘you’re the most beautiful girl i have ever seen, love. seriously’
‘if you don’t stop smiling like that, im gonna be forced to take you against this fucking wall love’
OOPSIES
HOW DID THAT GET THEERRREEEE
knows the whole school and literally the whole world is obsessed with you and is here for it
(but is also not)
he loves that people know how special you are bc you fckn are
but like
when he sees whores staring at you with gaping mouths and starry eyes he’s like
she’s MINE.
doesn’t enjoy people staring at his girl
10000% the type to wrap his arms around you and pull you back into him, genuinely acting as a shield for the stares
pd(bloody)a!!!
he’s a big big fan
obvs if it makes you uncomfy, he’ll understand and back off! your comfort is his main concern
HOWEVER
if you like it just like he does…
arm wrapped around you waist while you’re walking around
HANDDD HOLDING
he loves cuddling you
ur like his squishmallow 😘😘😘
he really enjoys showing you, all the time, how much you mean to him. how obsessed he is with you. bc he wants you to know
will readily admit to the fact he is very much on ur pink bedazzled leash xxxxx
he’s ur mf bitch ❤️❤️❤️
if ppl try and take the mick out of him for it he literally could not care less
and what???? it’s true
he would kiss the ground you walked on if you asked
if he notices you getting uncomfortable w ppl staring at you, he’s not afraid to confront them (if you want that)
‘yeah, mind looking anywhere bloody else mate?’
‘if you done leering at my girl you wanker, feel free to piss off’
if people happen to not heed his warning, he’s not afraid to fight someone for you
(one time he did and arthur got called in to ‘deal’ with his son—he gave him an approving hug and a chocolate frog)
you & the weasels are like this 🤞
ginny does not resent you bc ur a veela, IN FACCTTTT she actually really looks up to you and admires you, knowing you’re so much more than ur beauty
she’s wants to BE you
(apart from the dating her brother part, gag)
george calls you ‘little legend’ he thinks you’re great for making his brother so starstruck and mushy-goey all the soft things.
genuinely cannot wait for the day you become his sister in law 🤧
after ron got over his creepy little crush, he’s grown to see you as someone he adores (even if he would never admit it) and someone he really feels safe with
you make him feel wanted in his family and actually loved—for that, he loves you more
charlie thinks ur an absolute riot 😭😭
the first time you met you had pulled a prank on the twins, turning their skin lilac and giving them unicorn horns with fuzzy purple fur everywhere (human unicorns)
he’s adored you ever since
bill loves you like a little sister and fleur and you are legit best mates!!!
arthur holds you very dear to him as he sees how good you are for his son and how much of a good individual you are in general
molly was slightly hesitant initially
BUTTT then you knitted her and arthur winter hats for christmas, sent them with a cutesy note and some sweets and she knew she’d love you
(she really, truly does)
#fredweasleyisurseximinion
he wrote that himself xxxx
#fred weasley#fred weasley x reader#fred weasley imagine#fred weasely x y/n#harry potter#harry potter x reader#harry potter imagine#james potter x reader#james potter#fred weasley smut#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin#remus lupin imagine
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sana x reader
what if you were sana's new manager?
(also if this gets enough attention, i'll make a what-if series with different female idols, mostly pretty dark tho so dni if uncomfy!!)
cw: EXTREMELY ooc sana (she's so sweet, but here? not so much😭), age gap, power imbalance, obsessive/possessive behaviours, implied non-con towards the end
💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋
the moment you were promoted to being her manager, everything changed. sana was beautiful, poised, a fan favorite, and an idol who's been around for so long. naturally, you were really shocked, and slightly scared. imagine being in charge of a member of TWICE?? it was enough pressure to make anyone succumb quickly to stress, but you were dedicated to the job, which caught sana's attention, but not in a good way.
sana was not really pleased to see how... composed you were around her. the amount of compliments she got daily made her rather egotistical, so seeing you this "unbothered" when accompanying her to meetings and events really ticked her off, to put it simply. and when she heard about how old you were... sana's pride was HURT. a woman in charge of what she does, one who was younger than her by a few years? don't piss her off.
the next time you saw her, the mask fell off. sana would laugh at your smallest mistakes, throw away the food you gave her after a music show promotion, RIGHT in front of you, and treat every effort as something to be dismissed or useless. "do you think this is good enough? you were running late, i'm your fucking boss. seriously, what kind of manager are you?" sana scoffed as your face heated up in embarrassment, tears pricking at your eyes. why was she suddenly so mean? she stood closer to you, her tone laced with sadistic amusement. "don't cry, love, if you were more competent, i wouldn't be pissed, but... gotta work with what i got."
sana would sneer at your pathetic attempts to please her, and one night, she dropped all of her makeup brushes, and forced you to pick them up one by one. but what sana didn't expect was to feel.. something for you that very second. the way you always came back to her, still took care of her despite her countless insults towards you... she definitely went home to reflect on that.
the conclusion sana came to was that she really did like you. in her own, cruel way. and we've already established how she was an egotistical maniac who uses her power, so she refused to let you step out of line or get close to anyone else, and she’d punish you in small, petty ways if you tried. schedule changes without warning, "accidentally" spilling rumours that made things harder for you, and reminders that you only had this position because she allowed it. as much as you wanted to push back, the truth was undeniable: sana held your career—and your sanity—in her hands.
sana's fixation on you only seemed to get worse, as the months went by. and she made sure you KNEW it. she knew where you were at all times, texting you constantly, filling your phone with messages that were affectionate one moment and threatening the next. if you so much as glanced at anyone else, sana would go out of her way to isolate you, to sabotage anything that might distract you from her. "you’re mine," she'd whisper, almost tenderly, before tightening her grip on your waist as she pushed you against a wall. every attempt to set boundaries only seemed to feed her obsession. and with every passing day, you realized that she’d do anything, and i mean ANYTHING, to keep you by her side, whether you wanted it or not.
one fateful night, where she had dragged you to her penthouse, you would soon come to the realisation that sana was truly someone that you should've ran away from a loooong time ago. you sat stiffly on the edge of her bed, the dim glow of the bedside lamp casting shadows across the room. sana stood in front of you, close enough that you could feel the weight of her gaze. her hand moved to your shoulder, fingers pressing in with a possessive force that left no doubt who was in control. “don’t even think about leaving,” she whispered, her voice chillingly soft, as if daring you to defy her. sana leaned in, her other hand resting heavily between your legs, pinning you in place. every touch felt like a claim, each movement sending a quiet threat through the air. as her fingers tightened their hold, you realized escape wasn’t an option; you were exactly where she wanted you, and there was no way out.
sana's hands moved back up to your shoulders, firm and unyielding as she guided you back against the pillows, her hot tongue tracing possessively along your neck, the saliva cooling down quickly in the cold air, making your pulse race. she murmured sweet nothings into your ear, calming you down, voice low and commanding as she leaned in, body pressing onto yours. her hand slid down to your wrist, pinning it against the bed as her lips brushed close to your ear, each word a quiet, inescapable claim. the weight of sana's presence left no room for protest, every touch a reminder that here, in this room, you belonged entirely to her.
💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋
when you woke, the room was dark, save for the faint glow of her phone screen, casting eerie shadows across her face as sana sat beside you, watching. you tried to move, but a strange, deep ache reminded you how powerless you were in her world, in her hands. her fingers traced along your arm, and she smiled—a soft, chilling smile that only deepened your sense of dread. "you belong to me," sana whispered, voice filled with a twisted satisfaction. "I told you, no one else could ever love you like I do." you couldn’t remember when you’d fallen asleep, or how long she’d been there, but one thing was certain: there was no part of you sana hadn’t claimed, judging from the pain in your heart, and the bruises and hickeys shamelessly left in obvious areas.
#urno1luv#sana x reader#sana x fem reader#twice x reader#twice x fem reader#kpop smut#kpop scenarios#sana minatozaki#sana minatozaki x reader
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ᴘᴏᴠ: 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘵𝘰𝘴𝘩𝘪 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘰 o(〃^▽^〃)o



!sᴛᴇᴀʟ ᴍʏ sᴛᴜғғ ᴀɴᴅ ɢᴇᴛ sᴄᴀʟᴘᴇᴅ ɪᴍ ɴᴏᴛ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ!
✷ hitoshi enjoys quiet, lazy dates. he isn’t a flashy guy and frankly not into fancy expensive outings. he loves curling up in his dorm room, or his room at him with you, sharing snacks and playing video games all night. scrolling through his phone with you in his lap is eternal bliss to him. it’s everything he could ever want.
✷ he’s got your coffee order memorized by heart and takes pride in that. he’ll walk into school, the coffee from the shop in hand and he’ll give it to you with a smug expression. “the usual,” he’ll say, leaning down so you can give HIS usual kiss on the cheek as a thank you.
✷ hitoshi does indeed talk to cats as they walk past him, or vise versa. he’ll mumble a ‘hey little guy’ every so often, and doesn’t care if you’re around. he isn’t ashamed of his love for cats. bonus if you love them as much as he does and you both crouch down to try and get them to come your way.
✷ i feel like he’s be a very AVID bracelet wearer. each one he has is one you’ve either made him or gotten him. he wears them like they’re his most prized possessions and ONLY takes them off to shower. they stay on during training, when he goes to sleep, and throughout the day. he’ll lose his mind if he misplaces one and will search everywhere until he finds it.
✷ hitoshi definitely doodles in his notebook little things that remind him of you. he’s quiet about it, but his classmates will sometimes catch him writing your initials in red or pink pink with a heart over them. he can’t draw, but he tries to attempt a heart. poor guy.
✷ timeskip!shinso is patient with you in bed. he doesn’t rush anything, and that in itself can be agonizing. he takes his time with you, watching you squirm against restraints as he presses his lips in every spot that makes you twitch away or toward him. his idea of fun is seeing you whine and beg for him to just fuck you instead of teasing you. he loves seeing you beg to come undone. when you finally do, he rewards you so well.
✷ aftercare with hitoshi is sweet and deliberately gentle. he flips back into his aloof, soft side and cradles you like you’ve never been held before in your life while calming your shaky and groany breaths. he moved hair from your face because he knows it might be uncomfy. murmuring, he speaks up. “You okay?” when you nod, he smiles. You did so good.” He’ll grab you water, clean you up, and won’t let you go until he’s sure you’re safe and content.
#shinso#hitoshi#hitoshi shinsou#hitoshi shinso x reader#bnha hitoshi#mha shinsou#bnha#my hero academia#mha x reader#mha x you#boyfriend#timeskip
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no one’s ever had me (not like you)

joe burrow x reader
description: after a tough week 5 loss in overtime, joe comes home to you angry and confused. you try to make him feel better and comfort him, letting him know you’ll always be there.
warnings: nothing too bad, but still MDNI. (makes me uncomfy.) lots of angry joe, a bit of fluff, semi-spicy kiss. mostly angst.
word count: 1.8k
note. hi hi! this is my first joe fic/blurb so i hope you guys enjoy it. sorry in advance that lowercase is my aesthetic. i used to get yelled at for it in elementary school. i love you guys. who dey!! (title & plot are lyrics from so high school, i love u mother taylor.)
pacing. you were pacing back and forth in front of the television in joe’s living room, watching the seconds tick down to end regulation time in the game. it took everything in you not to turn it off.
you watched as the minutes, seconds, milliseconds in overtime ticked by, hoping and praying your boyfriend and his team could pull out a win.
you felt your heart lurch as mcpherson went for the field goal and the ball wasn’t in the correct place. wide left. you knew it was over. you continued watching, frozen in place, as baltimore did everything they needed to do to score. they made it to field goal range, kicked, and won the game. your heart was hammering against your chest. your breath was coming out in short puffs.
after valiant efforts from joe and the rest of the team, the bengals once again took a loss at the very end of the game, something that kept happening to them this year. you knew joe would come home upset.
watching the post game interview was going to be something you dreaded today. joe took his seat and began talking to the interviewers, answering their repetitive questions and talking about what needed to be done to fix the team, what could use work next week.
you rested your head in your hands and blew out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. “oh, joey…” you whispered, seeing your boyfriend’s clearly upset glare on the screen. you couldn’t wait to see him when he got home, but you were unsure of what his mood would be.
after the interview was done, you turned the television off. ‘i could start some laundry’ you thought, at least that’d keep you busy until joe’s return home.
you made your way to his bedroom, which honestly felt like your room too, and gathered all the clothes that needed to be washed before taking them to the laundry room. you tossed the laundry into the machine and then added in your favorite scent beads and detergent before turning it on and closing the lid.
‘i can tackle dishes next’ you thought, heading for the large kitchen. of course you could’ve loaded them into the dishwasher, but something needed to keep you busy and washing dishes was always strangely cathartic to you.
you popped your earbuds in and started listening to your favorite playlist before tackling the chore. once dishes were complete, you vacuumed, watered a few plants, and made yourself a snack. finally the washer beeped, so you went to switch the clothes over.
as you were switching them, joe arrived home, pulling his sleek black car into the garage before locking it up and heading into the house. listening to your music and keeping yourself busy helped lift your spirits some, which you hoped would aide you when joe finally made it back.
when he didn’t greet you upon entering the house, you knew tonight would be a tough night.
you peeked your head out of the laundry room to check for a clear coast, and it was. tiptoe-ing your way down the hall, you made your way to the kitchen where joe still was, his back facing you.
you cleared your throat softly to get his attention, but he didn’t move. you could see he was scrolling through his phone, you worried he was reading negativity that was being spewed about himself and the team.
“joey?” you called, your voice sounded smaller than you intended.
“what?” he snapped, turning to face you. you flinched at the tone of his voice, taking half a step back. internally he berated himself for scaring you, but his post-game mood was too foul to turn off now.
“i know it’s silly to ask, but are you okay?” you question, looking up at him from across the room.
he ran his hand through his short blonde hair before blowing a snarky chuckle through his nose, scoffing at you.
“am i okay?” he snarked, locking his phone and shoving it in his pocket. “what a great question! you sound like the post-game interviewers!”
the bite in his tone was starting to affect you, but you didn’t want to leave him alone just yet. as much as it hurt, you knew what he needed in this moment was to let this anger out any way possible.
“talk to me about it.” you pleaded, walking toward him and placing a hand on his forearm. he rolled his eyes as a response. “c’mon joey, i know you’re mad but you can—“ you don’t get to finish your sentence before joe groans out in response, a loud “UGH!” before lobbing his water bottle at the wall. you’re shocked it doesn’t bust a hole through.
“what is there to say, hmm? what do you want me to tell you that the world doesn’t already think or know? we aren’t looking like a championship team right now. everything we’re doing is never enough for success, and here i am, 27 years old and being called washed up.” he chides, looking down at you. his voice booms across the room, making you feel only inches tall.
your expression drops, and you turn your gaze toward the wall as tears well up in your eyes. joe takes a small step toward you, his hands flexing at his sides. you can tell he wants to reach out to you, touch you, apologize to you for scaring you.
“i’m sorry.” he says softly, hanging his head. you’ll let him make the first move. he steps toward you again, bringing a hand up to your shoulder, testing the waters. when he sees that you’re still receptive to his touch, despite his atrocious attitude, he moves his hand to the back of your neck before pulling you into him for a hug. you instinctively reach up and wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him into you.
both of you stay like that for a few moments, just holding each other and feeling each other breathe. joe’s face is buried in your neck and your hand is scratching slow soft circles into his hair. you hear him sniffle and you pull away slightly, trying to get a view of his face. he looks up at you with red eyes, tears falling down his cheeks.
“joey, baby,” you comfort him, “it’s going to be okay. you’re going to be okay.” your heart breaks seeing him so upset.
he says nothing, but leads you out of the kitchen and to the living room so you can sit down together. he plops onto the couch and pulls you into his lap, burying his face again.
“i just feel like i’m failing them. i’m doing everything within my power, and it doesn’t seem like enough.” he rasps, muffled into your neck. you say nothing, knowing he needs to get this out. you run your hands down his biceps as a gesture for him to keep going, that you understand.
“the whole world thinks i’m a fluke. they think my play-calling is shit, they think i had one kick-ass college season and that i made it to the nfl and choked. when does it end, you know? we took our team to the superbowl and what happened? we lost. it just feels like i’m stuck in this rut and i can’t get out.”
you sit for a moment, processing what he said. his words hurt you, just as much as you know the thoughts hurt him.
“i hear you joey. i really do. but i have some things i’d like to say, if that’s okay.”
he nods, expectant eyes raking over your face. “i’d love to hear it, baby. please.”
“first of all,” you start, playing up your sass in an attempt to make him laugh, “you aren’t washed up. people who think you are most likely sit on their couches and rot all day long while you’re out here training and conditioning your body for the physicality of your job. i think you’re in your prime.” you pause, squeezing his biceps for emphasis.
“next, you can’t take all the blame. sure, you’re the leader of the team, but it doesn’t all fall on you. it’s very noble of you to do that, but you don’t have to shoulder it. you played your heart out today. you all did. i’m so proud of you.” you move your hands to his face, cupping his cheeks.
“lastly, fuck what the world thinks, joe. you know how good you are. i know how good you are. your parents know, your teammates know. other players in the league know. you’re incredible. you’ve got this, and after all is said and done i will be here. win or lose, i’m here, and i’ve got you.”
his eyes soften as you finish speaking. you don’t get a verbal reply. his hands reach up to cup your face, pulling you into him for a long kiss. his lips are soft against yours and it doesn’t take long before his hands are slipping up the back of your hoodie and rubbing along the exposed skin of your back.
your hands stay on his cheeks, loving the feeling of him being so close to you, his body pressed into yours. “i. love. you. so. much.” you tell him between pecks, feeling him smile into the kiss. one of his hands returns to your face and then tangles into your hair, tilting your head slightly as his tongue drags over your bottom lip.
he slowly slips his tongue into your mouth, gliding it against yours. after a moment, you pull away for air.
“thank you for that,” he smiles, stroking his hands down your arms, “for all of it. i needed that. i love you too. and i’m sorry for scaring you with my temper.”
“it’s okay, mine can be worse.” you jest, poking him in the ribs.
he pulls you down so you’re both laying on the couch before pulling his large cable knit throw blanket over you both. “let’s put it out of our minds, get takeout, and watch a movie.” you suggest, and he smiles in agreement. the two of you get cozy and pick your movie and dinner, remaining snuggled up on the couch as you watch and eat.
“you’re right, you know.” joe finally speaks again, as the movie nears its end.
“i usually am, but enlighten me.” you laugh, slipping your hand under his shirt and resting it on his abdomen.
“you’ve always had me. every turn, every bump in the road. every time i feel like i’ve made the biggest mistake, the biggest failure of my life. you’re there. you talk me through it and you put me in my place. no one’s ever had me like you have. i love you too, by the way.”
a soft smile spreads across your face as you reach up to stroke his hair again. “ditto baby, no one’s ever had me, not like you.”
he leans down and presses another soft, sweet peck to your lips. everything was going to be okay. you always had each other.
tags: @slimshiesty if you wanna be added, or if you have requests pls send me asks or dm’s! 💗
#joe burrow#cincinnati bengals#joe burrow fanfic#joe burrow fic#joe burrow x reader#joe burrow angst#joe burrow fluff#joe burrow smut#joe burrow fanfiction#joe burrow imagine#joe burrow x reader fanfic#nfl fanfic#nfl fanfiction
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dating idia hc :3
there will be nsfw and sfw hcs
sfw hcs ♡
oh boy will it take a while until you guys date-
won't matter if you crushed on him first or he crushed on you first.
will probably take YEARS until he'll even say yes
oh yeah, you are going to confess
most of your dates are online.
ESPACIALLY AT THE START OF THE RELATIONSHIP!!!!
he just doesn't have it in him to go out in public
will actually need a lot of reassurance when dating, for all types of stuff
is he pretty enough? will you really be happy being stuck with him for the rest of your life? (as in he has a job predetermined to him and you'll have to come with) ya know, stuff like that.
he NEEDS you and Ortho to be friends. if Ortho doesn't like you, this won't work out.
when he's in his element(gaming and stuff) he can and will mock you, not like he actually thinks you are inferior, but it's fun for him
you can do it to him too, he won't get hurt. it'll probably just get his competitive drive up
at first he'll feel uncomfy just blabbering on and on about his interests, but soon enough (very soon) he will be talking your ear off- gl
in the future you will have a cat. maybe even more!
how can Idia live without cats?
the moment he feels comfortable going on irl dates just know that a cat cafe is your first destination.
other irl dates will include staying in his room.
that's it. were you really expecting Idia to go out a lot? maaaaybe he'll come to you, if he's comfy enough but really you'll be coming over to his place.
I just want to tell you guys that this man will probs make a game about you
he'll never have the guts to actually show to you but he will brag to Ortho, and knowing Ortho he'll probably tell you.
and then it ends up with Idia, flustered, showing you this game.
it'll probably be like a dating game where the love interest is based off of you, looks, personality, everything! and Idia's the protag romancing you :3
nsfw hcs ♡
long fucking dick good luck
like maybe 8 or 9 inches????
above average ok?
Idk if it's a turn off for some of you but he'll be really sweaty- like you already sweat during sex but this guy sweats balls :/
he's usually the one to get fucked, doesn't matter what your gender is he'll be fucked out of his mind
very rarely does he fuck you
but when he does it'll only be for a reason, usually something competitive.
like maybe you two made a bet which of you can be better at a video game or something and in the end you get your brain fucked out
deeper into the relationship I just know Idia will degrade you during sex Idk if any of you noticed but the moment Idia gets comfy he acts like a god-
I don't think he'll want to be degraded though...maaaaybe in a very rare case Idk but he doesn't seem like the typa guy to be into being degraded...
I don't think he has a high sex drive. it'll be very rare for him to want to have sex, but if you ask and actually set a horny mood it'll turn him on.
I just know that when his brain's all fucked out he'll be babbling nonsense the whole time, but the best thing is that it doesn't take him too long to be fucked out of his mind
so you'll be hearing random stuff come out of his mouth about how much he loves you and finds you attractive after a short time of having sex
he strikes me as the type who's really loud yet he wants to keep all the noises in so he bites anything he can during sex
oh your shoulder's a little too close to his mouth? bitten.
there's nothing except his own lips to bite? bitten.
Idia's cum is probably really sticky...just letting ya'll know ;)
I think I should make a separate post about his kinks so don't ask why I didn't really write anything for this.
#disney twisted wonderland#twst#twst wonderland#idia shroud#idia shroud x reader#idia smut#twisted wonderland idia#idia x reader#idia shroud smut#twst idia#idia twst
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