#and it angers me that i can't and im too afraid because what if i don't get the chance a all?

[softshuji]

Do you ever just

Really wanna tell someone in particular that you're really proud of them? That you know and see and understand everything they have experienced and say and even what they don't and you just want them to know you think the world of them but you can't do it because you're not really in the space where you can say that kind of vulnerable thing to them? Yeah.

[cvnt4him]

sassy deku >>> (big ass forehead)

YK YOU WRONG FOR TALKING AB MY MAN LIKE THAT HES GORGEOUS HIS FOREHEAD IS PERFECT THE WAY IT IS.

N YKW? IM AB TO MAKE A FULL THING TOO. CAN WE TALK AB THE HEAD THING THO??? LIKE HUH LIKE THAT PARAGRAPH IS MIND BLOWING.

...........................................

Getting an attitude w sassy men

..............................................

M. izuku.

You and izuku never really get into fights so when you randomly got an attitude w him you better believe he got pissed. He's so sweet and nice to you under all circumstances whatsoever, he doesn't want to disrespect you at all but God lately you've just been getting on his nerves. The way you bitch around and yell at him like he exploded the sun.

"are you fucking kidding me izuku? Like are you genuinely insane. I just cannot with you."

You scoff and yell at him with an angry tone.

He rolls his eyes and ignores you, you've really just been so annoying. Like God why can't you simply shut up and suck his cock. Like he's been through so much in his life and this so what he gets in return?

"yeah okay bitch."

"excuse me?!"

"you fucking heard me, you've literally been bitching all day over some shit I had nothing to do with like I just can't. I've saved all of Japan and instead of getting a loving girlfriend to cook and clean for me you're sitting here being a whiney little bitch."

He spat venom with every word that left his beautifully pink tinted lips, his eyes squinted at you with spite. The way he spoke stunned you, you were frozen in shock. You're sweet loving boyfriend who'd never raise his voice at you or even attempt to hurt your feelings,

Tears welled in your eyes as you were blinded by the forming tears, blinking heavily trying to bat away the tears that were starting to become present. Izuku never got angry or even attempted to fight with you, he hated the guilty feeling he'd always feel and not djd you make him feel it.

You made him sleep on the couch for a couple of nights, the main reason he actually stayed on the couch was because he felt he deserved it after what he'd said and how hed spoken to you. Izukus kother would be so disappointed in him. The words that left his mouth were misogynistic and ugly, he wasn't that kind of person, but for some reason you brought out the bad in him.

There was also the good. You knew how to make him laugh, smile, feel oh so good. So why had he been so mean to you lately. He wished he knew.

Izuku came knocking on your shared room door waiting for you to say something, anything. It'd been so long since he'd heard your voice, since you'd spoken to him directly.

"come in."

A soft voice was heard through the wooden door as he practically pushed the door down trying to hurriedly open it to get to you. He gulped out of fear, afraid of what you'd say to him, how you'd feel if you looked at him. He hated himself for what he said, and he wanted to apologize.

You looked at him with sad eyes, you were under the cover hiding your face at first. It felt so good to see your beautiful face after so long. He sighed at your gorgeous features, your lips in a pouty frown and your hair a mess. You looked good no matter what.

"my pretty girl..."

He whispered to you, rushing to your side. He instantly wrapped his arms around your figure as you did the same, he moved the cover on top of the both of you and cuddled you. He buried his face in your neck planting little fast kisses everywhere.

"I'm so sorry.. you've just been so.. difficult lately."

He says into your ear. he feels you tense under his touch before moving back to look at him with a disgusted look. He gave you a confused one, why had you looked like this? He was apologizing!

"are you fucking kidding?"

"wha--"

"I'M being difficult??? If I'm SOO difficult just fucking leave."

Here we go again. He sighed heavily getting rather impatient which izuku was nothing but. You were angering him once again because you're bitching and nagging before he can even get a word out, per usge.

"my god you're such a spoiled little bitch. you never let me speak, always making things about yourself. I came fucking apologize but if you're going to be a fucking cunt I might as well fuck yours."

"are you fucking kidding me izuku?! you-- wait what."

Anyways he bent you over and yanked your underwear and pants off in one go didn't even bother prepping or anything just shoved his semi hard cock inside of you and thrusted into you at an insane pace.

Moral of this story is he didn't stop fucking you until you were a sloppy cum filled mess.

...........................................

I. tenya.

Tenya was so full of your shit. You've gotten in trouble in class, kept blowing him off, and then proceeded to ignore his texts.

He was so fed up with you. He needed to talk to you and you were going to hear him out not just as the class president but as your boyfriend.

"what do you want tenya."

"for you to stop acting like a cunt."

"i--- wha-"

"I'm so tired of your shit y/n you've been acting like a cold hearted ice queen towards me all day. I want to be with you but I can't stand being in the same room with someone who doesn't care about me."

"I never said i---"

"yet you're acting like I'm some minor pleb. Y/n I love you more than anything and yet you're standing here treating me like a insignificance to your presence."

He says putting his hands on his hips. God he looked so sassy like that it was actually kind of hot. He saw how a smirk appeared into your face as you looked him up and down and he tensed under your eyesight.

"yeah you're right tenya I've been kind of a dick all day hm, baby? Let me make it up to you yeah?"

You say batting your eyelashes at him walking towards him and rubbing your hands up and down his chest, burying your face in his neck and whispering and fanning your breath over it. He shivered and put his hands on your waist pulling you closer into his chest, he lifted your head closer to his, your lips so close to touching.

He pushed you down on the bed and dusted himself off.

"you've got to do a better job than that if you want me to forgive you.

Fuck, the smirk he gave you while walking out of his room was diabolical. God how did you end up with a sexy boyfriend like this. Yet he's such a pain in the ass too.

...........................................

M. neito.

Monoma was an ass sometimes, sure. A sassy diva, yeah, but he was never rude to you. He never made you feel like you were less than perfect, he always gave you what he felt you deserved and always made sure you knew how much you meant to him. He never let his feud with your class fuck with him. Until now.

He's been letting everything your class does get to him, and since you're in class 1A he's been getting rather pissed with you. The way he blew you off and pushed you aside like some petty diva was about your last straw.

You walked all the way to class 1B dorm house and bust through the doors in a fit of rage. You were not going to let anyone stop you from fucking up his world.

The way all of his classmates looked at you like you were crazy, some laughing others just genuinely confused why someone from class 1A was here to begin with.

"where the hell is he."

You say yelling to his classmates as they all pointed to up the stairs where the dorms were. You've been there before, not while everyone was awake. But you've been there before. You knew exactly where his dorm was located.

You stormed up the stairs and quickly made your way to his dorm. Upon arriving you bust down his door with your foot, he screams and hides under his work desk for cover. Once he seen it was you he scoffed and was ready to tell at you before being stopped before anything could even leave his lips.

"are you fucking kidding me?? You've been a dick to me all week for what? Because my class is higher than yours?? get over it. At the end of the day you're in hero courses you'll live. Stop treating me like a nuisance because of some sick twisted vendetta you have with my class!"

He scoffed, getting up from his hiding place with a hand to his chest in an offended manner. There was no way you seriously just spoke to him like this?? Where has this side of you come from?? You've always been so sweet and obedient with him!

He was speechless, not a word left his opened mouth. How could you speak to him like some loser. Like those dorks in your class!!

"nothing to say?"

You ask with your hands on your hips. He was sassy, but you knew how to play sassy as well. He crossed his arms and looked away from you. Not daring to utter a word. You kind of liked this side of him, the side that didn't talk back to you. It suited him. A pretty face with such pretty lips need to be shut sometimes. He looks better when he sits there and looks pretty.

You smirk and push him down onto his bed, he lets out a sound as you crawl on top of his lap and put both of your hands on his chest.

"my pretty boy.~"

He was a flushed mess, he opened and closed his mouth like a goldfish, he was stunned that you'd just done this to him. He was always the one to take the lead and initiate things!! He hated how much he didn't mind you being on top.

...........................................

B. katsuki.

Katsuki Bakugou, the world's sassiest man. The way he walks with a sway to his hips, the way he stands, the way he just exists unapologetically is enviable to all. Some envied his tiny snatched waist while others envied the fire behind his eyes. He loved being a hero but he loved his girlfriend more.

He loved you so much, so dearly he had no problem with admitting it either. However he hated, absolutely despised when you caught an attitude with him like he doesn't treat you like a queen.

He was absolutely appalled when you started bitching and yelling at him, waving your arms about and threatening to slap the fuck out of him. He scoffed with wide eyes and a smile like he was daring you to. He wasn't afraid to hit you back by all means, however he loved you too much to bring you into harms way in any kind. So he wouldn't actually hit you but throwing you against things, oh yeah that was an option.

"like honestly katsuki could you be more stupid?"

"bitch? Me, stupid? Hah! You're hilarious! Actually, you deserve an award for your humor honestly, how do you do it."

He jokes slapping his knee with an angry smile still plastered on his beautiful face. God you hated how he had such an effect on you despite how furious you were with him. He knew the huge effect he had on and used it to his advantage.

He smirked and pulled you by your waist mid sentence, you were yelling at him and your fiery words were instantly cut off by the way he looked at you, the way he touched you, the way he moved slightly closer to you face his breath fanning over your face. He peered down at you with those volcanic ruby red eyes of his, daring you to do something anything. He wanted it.

"fucking asshole."

"I could fuck yours if you'd like, yeah?"

God you hated how much you loved him. He was an asshole, but he was yours. He never took you seriously when the two of you argued or when you got an attitude with him. You knew this and it angered you, but you could never stay angry with him because he'd always fuck it out of you like he hated you.

He pulled you into a passionate kiss still having that shit eating smirk on his face once he pulled away holding his forehead to yours as he chuckled lowly.

"you hate me."

"so fucking much."

You say pulling him into a heated kiss, walking backward towards his bed so he could fuck you like a slut.

...........................................

AN: chat this was the worst thing I've ever made, I don't think I made them sassy at all, except katsuki anything he does is sassy. however I low-key love how mean I made izuku, I js feel like after his vigilante arc and the war he's a different person, like he's still a sweetie pie but he doesn't take shit from anyone me thinks.

[icarusredwings]

Yall ever think about how Logan has *nothing* from his universe? I can't imagine he had a big collection of things, but it makes me wonder about his very little amount of pictures, his Veteran hats, his badges, his devils bergade hat, honorary medals. No, he wouldn't have kept all of it. Not even half of it. But I just know that he sometimes sees someone with a matching badge from a specifc group and wants to flash them his own but can't. He hates the things he's done with his life, hates himself just as much. But he hates the way he has nothing to show for it even more.

Hates the way Jean turned Logan's old room into a memorial and hung up every award he kept, every badge, every medal, every hat, anything that showed significance of the time Logan spent protecting people.

At least that's what she claimed it's meant for but this Logan knows. He knows just how bloody these badges were before cleaned. He knew what it took to get that medal and reconized the stitching in one of the uniforms because his has to be fixed the same way.

But do you know what he really hates?

That almost everything in this room is from a time in which he was owned. Treated like an animal to be caged. Leashed. Chained.

It becomes very clear to him that the reason this Logan was liked so much is because he stayed, sure, but also he let himself be controlled. Be the property of someone else. Whether that be the X Men or the government, the military, didn't matter. He hated it all.

And yet... he's still envious. Because Logan STAYED. He fought when things got gritty.

Something he was too much of a coward to do.

When things got rough, he wouldn't fight like this Logan, No. He'd leave. Like a pathetic wuss.

Still to this day it confuses him. Why did he hold such an anger for him? Why did he let himself get chained down? Why did he care about people who just wanted to use him? Wouldn't it be better to leave? Who did he stay for?

"...He would have hated this."

Turning, He sees Kitty standing there beside him. He didn't even see her come in.

"Mmh.."

".. He would have said that too... I told her it was dumb. That you hated everything she makes you out to be... " She says, not looking at him but the picture on the wall.

"I'm not hi-"

"I'm not talking to you." The statment is sharp, glancing at him for just a moment. "But clearly, you hate it too.. I wonder..Do you hate it for the same reason?"

"...She made him out to be some kinda caged animal."

"She made you out to be some kinda war hero."

The parallels were said at the same time.

Kitty looks at him, brow raised. "He spent his entire life trying not to be that-"

"And I've been trying my entire life to be a hero. Look where that got me." Logan tells her, shoving his hands in his pockets.

Kitty turns, flicking him in the nose.

"Ow, Hey!" He growls, trying to grab her hand, but she only phases through.

"You saved an entire universe. How are you not a hero?"

"Yeah! By killing my entire universe. One in which I've killed far more than you could probably count!"

Kitty gives him a look, crossing her arms and tilting her head. "...I'm a comp sci professor... try me. I bet more numbers have came out since you were in school, gramps."

Rolling his eyes, Logan grumbled. "Sure. Like im afraid of you, half pint."

Katherine's eyes widden and frowns, now looking away, hugging herself. He could smell how much this upset her, smelling the tears whelling up and the sadness within her.

"... Look I'm sorry. I don't know what you and him had but-"

She punches him square in the nose. Blinking, the pain floods the broken cartilage that had snapped. Blood trickles down his lip. For being so little, she sure packed a punch... wonder where she learned that.

His hand comes up, feeling it, then glared, snarling. "You little b-!"

"Ha ha! Can't touch me!" She says, wiping tears as his hand phases through her stomach.

"Rule number one! Never let your guard down." She tells him, now running off, completely morphing through the door as if it wasn't even there. "Can't catch me old man!"

Standing here, Logan blinks, his hands itching and eyes thinning. He wants to chase her. He's not sure why, but... he has a feeling that this isn't a fight. It feels more like a game of tag.. a dangerous game. But a game.

The smallest of smiles come to his face, unseathing his claws. Ripping open the door, he starts sniffing, trying to track her through the mansion.

A feeling of home fills his chest. It's foreign but...nice.

And just for a second? Logan thinks he knows why the dead fucker stayed..

[ninyard]

Heyy! You said someone should ask you about Kevin under this post about Kevin's struggles from the nest of which we don't know enough... So I'm asking you about Kevin! Please tell us your Kevin thoughts! You always make very good points and I like reading your thoughts!!

cody my friend I am so glad you asked but you might regret it. i hope you're prepared from an unorganised huge convoluted MESS of a ramble

i've been thinking for a few days about this one like... what would a kevin POV look like? what is he hiding? how does he cope? WHO IS HE?

the kevin we ""know"" is a "coward", an insufferable bitch, an asshole and a hardass. other people's opinions and view of him makes up the entirety of our impression of who he is. but that's not who he is. that's just who we're supposed to believe he is.

kevin, born and bred to have this... borderline psychopathic lack of empathy, who can look his teammates in the eye after being told seth is dead or andrew is being committed and say, "what about the game?"

but when the raven's are switching districts; his sense of danger and fear is paralysing. he's three steps ahead trying to figure out how to please riko, how to keep himself safe, willing to put himself back into the centre of his abuse just to stop riko from finding him and killing him. he has to get blackout drunk to deal with any amount of riko. he's frozen with fear by being in the same room as him.

kevin knows where jean's mind and body goes to when hes panicking, knowing his worst place is right back in the nest being drowned by riko. kevin telling neil "do you know what he'll do to you?" and "he'll break you" when neil asks for his ticket. kevin's text to him before he goes into the nest, and staring at neil like he'd seen a ghost when neil returns after the nest (when he looks like the butcher). his comforting "i know what he's like" or "i know how he sees you, i know it means he did not hold back,".

kevin nervous breakdown panic attack day vs kevin smile for the cameras one track exy mind day

im so intrigued by him. how does he cope? his mother is dead, probably killed by the mafia family he was raised by. he grew up into a cult, he was only a child watching neil's father cut a man into pieces in front of him. how many other's had he seen?

how many other injuries cover his body, in places where the cameras can't see? how many rapes and assaults was he forced to watch in the nest? how many beatings was he forced to participate in? what did he have to say to jean in french that he didn't want riko to hear?

he needs someone with him all the time because of the nest. he's a "health freak" because of the nest. his sleep schedule, his anger, his anxiety.

did he say "what about the season?" re: andrew after drake because he doesn't care, or did he think "i've seen this happen too many times. and they've always kept playing,"? did he think "andrew is the strongest person i know. andrew is stronger than me. he would never let this destroy him," knowing that it has?

nobody has protected him in his life apart from the cameras and andrew.

he's scared. he doesn't know what love is supposed to look like.

he's only been a human for a year.

his scars are healing for the first time in his life and they're not being replaced by new ones, but every day he's afraid that that's going to get ripped out from underneath him. his entire life already got flipped upside down when he left the nest. of course exy is the only thing he "cares" about.

because it's the only thing that's been certain in his life, and even for those few weeks or months where he thought he would never play again, he trained and trained, and learned how to use his non-dominant hand because he can't lose this. he can't lose exy like he's lost everything else.

kevin has never had anything stable in his life except for violence and exy. now he has people he's supposed to care about, and he has to change his priorities. he has to learn how live a life that isn't fueled by self-preservation for the first time ever.

jean was only in the nest for five years; and look at him. look at what the nest has done to his social skills, his view of himself, his self esteem. look at what it's done to him, how he expects violence and contrition, coach and always waiting and waiting and waiting for the punishment to come.

kevin might not have had the same level of physical abuse that jean had, but he was there far longer. the ravens existed before him; their mindset and their abuse and their violence and their poison.

he's been drinking the raven poison since his childhood. the only difference between him and jean other than those things above is that kevin had more pressure to hide it, because he was half of the face of the ravens, half of the face of Exy; media trained or PR trained or a master at being a fraud and faking the way he speaks when he's being recorded.

kevin knows how to hide his abuse because he has always had to, and he's had quite a lot of practice at it.

kevin has only been a human for a year. kevin has only been kevin for a year.

so who is he? does he even know?

or is he just Kevin Day, Raven Fox starting striker, number two, six foot two, left handed right handed left handed, heavy racquet, stick size five? is that all he will ever see himself as?

anyways. or something like that. maybe he is just an insufferable bitch for no reason at all. who knows!

[4lydsmarie]

sweater weather .. dallas winston x reader

fem!reader x toxic!dallas winston "it's too cold for you here.."

warning(s): toxic relationship! dallas keeps trying to push reader away but she won't budge, and he's js like "?? why r u still here" because he's TERRIFIED of love or commitment. things change toward the end though(?).

a/n: i have woken again to post for you guys 🥰 this is true dedication bc i started this at 1:03am and it's now 2:50 at the time of officially uploading this (with this a/n cause it's an edit). first i was gonna talk ab how dilf matt dillon is, then i was gonna make matt hcs, THEN i was gonna do dally hcs, and FINALLY i decided on writing this because toxic dallas is stuck in my headdd😣. i am a FIRM believer that dallas winston is EITHER loverboy softboy around reader OR cold toxic bf that is afraid of commitment and love because of his past in new york. NO OTHER WAY TO PUT IT!

dating dallas, you knew whaat would come with it. no, not just the constant "gettin' it in with the fuzz" or his repetitive fights at buck's on a thursday night, but the laid back "ya know i don't love anythin'" motto he always has going on. you and dallas had probably broken up 5 or 6 times in the past month. either he'd be out with another broad, or he'd be dismissing your feelings again and telling you "i mean i like ya, doll. that's close enough to what you're talkin' about, right? i mean what's love anyways? don't say things you don't understand.."

you'd recently just gotten back together with dallas. you'd broken up with him because you found out he was hitting on another girl, this time a soc named cherry valance.

well, in due time another argument would come up. so here you are, arguing with dallas again because you told him you loved him again and finally snapped at his unbothered, half-assed response.

"dallas i don't understand!" you yelled. "all i try to do is get you to love me because that's what a relationship is all about! i do everything for you and give you chance aftter chance. but no, you just HAVE to keep it up like you care about nothing i do for you!! what's the point dallas? why knock my heart around just 'cause you can't commit to anything?" by now tears welled up in your eyes, but your anger overshadowed the embarrassment you might have crying in front of dallas.

"i don't have to keep nothin' up doll, that's just me. man i thought this love problem you got goin' on in your head was a one time thing. if i knew you were always gonna be so emotional and stuck on tryin' to get love all the time then maybe i wouldn't have dated you at all!" dallas yelled back. you scoffed as you walked up to him, even angrier than before.

"god i hate you dallas! you're not fucking cool, and one day i hope you wake up and see that! the world isn't all bad you just make it out to be that way so you can have a reason to be miserable. i hate it all, and the thing i hate the most is that you just can't love me after all i do!" you gave dallas a little push at the last part. at this point, you couldn't stop the tears from flowing as you grabbed your stuff and walked home. not to mention, the whole argument was in front of the curtis' house. who needed tv when you had your weekly dallas and yn drama, huh?

seemingly on queue, rain started to pour, drenching you in water. you let out a huff in annoyance as you finally made it to your house, slamming your front door behind you.

meanwhile dallas stood in front of the curtis house still, watching you walk away. he tried to act like he didn't care, but deep down he knew he did. "did she get home safe? is she alright? man, i messed up. god, im a jerk. do i love her?" were the questions racing through his mind. he didn't know wether he should run to your house or keep going about his day like nothing happened.

the sound of the curtis' screen door closing brought back dallas' attention as darry walked up to him, trying to give whatever advice he could. "hey dal, maybe you guys should call it quits or somethin', i mean-"

"hey man how 'bout you shutup, alright? mind your own." dallas clapped back, interrupting darry. darry seemingly understood his defeat as he raised his hands in surrender and backed up into the house. all the guys asked what was going on, and as a response he just sighed and shook his head.

..

about an hour later you heard a knock on your door. assuming it was your best friend marcia, since you'd called her a couple minutes before to sleep over, you opened the door without checking who it was. to your surprise, you were met with dallas.

in his hand he had a rose, definitely stolen, some soda (i say pop where im from but whatever..), and a box of milk duds, also probably stolen.

you scoff out of shock before finally speaking. "dally? what's this?" you asked. dallas just rolled his eyes and responded "just let me in the house, man i wouldn't even be caught dead doin' this for anyone.." you couldn't help but grin as you let him in, closing the door behind him. yeah you guys had previously argued but, it felt good to be in dally's presence again..

you both took a seat on your bed, sitting in silence for a bit. finally, you decided you'd had enough of the tension. "so, you gonna explain where all this came from" you asked, pointing towards the items he'd brought you. "just thought i'd do somethin' nice man, that's it." he leaned back onto your bed a bit. "oh, sure okay." you responded dryly.

dallas sat back up and scooted towards you. "yn.." he said, making you look up and respond with a simple 'hm?'. "listen, i care about you alright? but you gotta stop with the saying you love me. i'm not a good guy and i don't do right all the time. you gotta love someone who ain't like me, alright?" you frowned at his words. "dallas, the way you see yourself is totally different than how i do. i know you've been through a lot that you'll probably never tell me about, but that doesn't mean anything in my eyes. i do love you and i won't stop saying it cause i know one day you'll say it back. sometimes you're a little cold, sometimes it's too cold for me here...but i'll keep tryin' anyways dally." you turned away from dallas as you spoke, tears filling up your eyes yet again.

dallas sighed and stayed quiet for a bit, seemingly thinking about what to say. finally, he replied "yeah, alright. hey ask me again in the future. maybe my world'll be different and i'll think about it, huh?" you told yourself "at least it was a start" as you nodded in response to dallas' words.

finally, you'd decided to move onto dallas' lap. he grinned as he leaned in to kiss you. and you guys kissed for a while too. dallas didn't need to say it, but you knew he loved you deep down.

and he knew it too.

yet still, you both awaited the next argument to come. after all, he's still (somewhat) the same old dally. only difference is you both knew he cared about you a bit (and sorta loved you too).

[johnnycakesb14de]

ICKS THE GREASERS WOULD GIVE

(sorry not sorry y'all)

DARRY

Would get mad a Ponyboy and if you stand up for him (if he's being unreasonable) he'll get even more mad and yell at you

Anger issues and takes it out on you (NEVER EVER physically) and will apologize eventually but still makes you feel bad

Unknowingly gaslights you by saying things like "your acting unreasonable." Or "your being crazy."

SODAPOP

Completely fucking oblivious to girls flirting with him because he's so used to it and won't realize it til you tell him

Will be closed off if you give him a vague discription of what you're doing or where you're going because of sandy

PONYBOY

Can genuinely just be a bitch like if he's in a bad mood he's like me on day two of my period

Also he won't say anything about it he'll genuinely just be a cunt

You've definitely had to walk out on his silly business once

Scared the shit out of him tbh

JOHNNY

I genuinely can't think of anything for him

He's just like doesn't radiate anything bad

Maybe he like keeps things from you like how he's feeling

Or where he's sleeping that night because he doesn't want you to feel bad for him

In the end still not really a ick

Flirts with other girls to make you upset if you made him upset

Totally not afraid that your gonna do what Sylvia did to him so he totally doesn't accuse of it occasionally

Smokes a lot and doesn't plan on stoping

Lacks communication skills

Everything he did to cherry at the drive in

My man y'all ���️❤️❤️😻😻😻😻

TWO-BIT

Jokes at inappropriate times and will not stop

Will make jokes about things you haven't mentally recovered from

Achollic and refuses to admit it

STEVE

Mean like literally

Can be too rough at times and doesn't understand it

Like he'll hold your hand or something and just squeeze it way to hard and if you tell him to stop he'll say your being a baby

IM SORRRYYYYYT

[eepyslut]

A 3am delirious draft i wrote last night before falling asleep that i don't know how to continue. If its bad remember i wrote this at 3am

-------

Lord knows jey adores rhea, but it was the third time she asked if everything was okay with them this week. Every time things seemed to ease and fall into quiet peace Rhea would turn an anxious mess. They aren't together. He's more like a friend right now. He's giving her space, and he's helping to glue the scattered remains of her heart.

It's a direct response to dominik's betrayal. He knows, the sense of calm dominik lulled rhea before stabbing her in the back, had rattled her. To hear him tell the world the relationship she carefully watered for two years felt like his personal hell is destroying her. She doesn't feel secure in her actions, afraid of missing again the part where she fucks up so royally she will be a victim of that treatment again.

And he curses Dominik every single time Rhea looks at him with uncertain, worried eyes asking if everything is okay, if he's mad at her. He can't imagine how it feels, to be spat in the face with all the things you did out of love. He can see how it cuts deep into rhea's flesh when another article comes out and that bitch of a man throws another blow at their past together. 

It reaches a boiling point after bash, the press articles come out and he doesn't hear of her for days, he chooses to give her space, that one was a lower than hell blow. Something she would probably prefer to cry alone before she looked for support. But she doesn't show up to their flight, and it gets concerning when damian can't get ahold of her.

After a few calls, Damian pulls out of the show, arguing he won't show up until he makes sure Rhea is okay, and if it wasn't for priest insistence, he would have stayed too.

By the time he finally got into the airplane, wifi damian had texted him.

Priest:

Hospital

Found her drunk out of her mind, the apartment was a mess

I think she fell off the stairs.

Her knee is fucked up and she has a few minor cuts fromt the fall.

I couldn't find her phone, im taking her home with me when they discharge her.

I dont think she can stay alone.

Rage starts to boil in his veins. He knows dominik does it on purpose, to hurt her, and relishes in her reactions, like her pain amuses him. He wonders if he will laugh at this, and how will he keep himself in check if he does.

Damian was the only thing keeping him from bashing mysterio's skull in, and back then, it was rhea's sad demeanor fueling his anger. This shit was serious now. On sight.

Damian kept texting him updates. Rhea has to stay home for a few weeks. She will be on crutches. She won't get discharged until she sees a psychiatrist. Doctors are worried. They're considering it could have been on purpose. He will be staying with her.

Was it that bad? Would she do it on purpose? She hadn't been okay as of lately. She barely slept, barely ate, and spent too much time working out to exhaustion. He's aware of her sleeping something because she naps with them whenever she can, but nightmares dont let her test at night.

Hunter called them all to a meeting, informing rhea to be out for 3 weeks and how things were going to go during that time. It was all good until the end, dominik had managed to stay fairly quiet, but he asked, in a mocking tone, "What? the crybaby needed a vacation?"

[howlsofbloodhounds]

howl, if you want killer to get worse, i can give you him getting worse csbhbdjs

imagine in the scenario where killer gets to see color after such a long time, he just lets all his carefully suppressed emotions and thoughts burst like a dam. words just tumbles out his mouth incoherently, coated in lies and truths and fear and anger. killer would present more stable in front of color because he wants color to feel like he's doing something right, that killer is not irreversibly broken. but now in front of his savior, his safe sanctuary, he can't help but string together his confession (love confession? confession of sins?) that is somehow so familiar on his tongue. it's okay, if he makes this sound good enough, just like with chara and nightmare, color will forgive him.

'color i'm so sorry. for i have failed you. for what i did to you. for what i allowed to be done to you. please don't throw me away. please don't throw me away. please don't leave me. oh god, please let me have this. please let me have my happy ending with you. god, forgive me, you can have me in any way you want. i'd do everything for you. for you. so don't leave.'

and like, color just stands there, slowly realizing the extent of killer's devotion to him. this cannot be healthy for either of them. color can't be killer's everything. but then, what's the solution? he can't leave killer like this, so emotionally unstable, so vulnerable. so he just holds killer in his arms, letting killer soak in the warmth of his body. color doesn't say anything because he dreads what killer would do. every word he says, killer would take as gospel. maybe he just hates killer a little bit, for making him so afraid of himself. but his hatred never takes root because deep down color cares for killer too much. in contrast with killer's immense LOVE, color has genuine love flowing in him for everything, and that includes killer too.

Sobbbing killer i hate you & i love you u miserable bastard.

killer learn to start living for yourself please i am begging 🙏.

and i still can’t help picture the tenderness between color and killer. like even when killer forces and manipulates a punishment he keeps praising color or like..gently reverently and lightly caressing colors bones with his bloody broken fingers and cooing and color can fucking tell hes not even aware of what’s happening anymore and losing blood and then imagine whenever he starts slipping into stage 1.

like it starts with the tears, and the confused wiping away of them and the self deprecating laugh and the wobbling soul and then it escalates to a sudden look of confusion and hurt and pain and suddenly killer starts trembling and sobbing and he instinctively flinches when color reaches for him and that just shatters colors soul but he keeps going to hold him because he knows killer needs it and killers all tense and cringing away until exhaustion gets him and slumps in colors arms and uggh like killer curling up in a small ball in the middle of their shared bed and clearly trying to hide from color and like

color just has to try and keep it together until killer passes out. and then hell bandage him and clean him and get him ready for bed and then fucking go lay on the couch and cry himself to sleep

{ @what-have-i-unleashed }. (Ur user is what im currently asking myself lmao)

[oreo-oro-orero]

The Idea of a scene or chapter where Jinx has to comfort Ekko after she witnesses him having a breakdown would be heartwarming and heartbreaking.

Ekko always struck me as a person who despite looking as though he has everything together especially when it comes to the rest of the cast, he is actually hurting greatly almost to the point where it's starting to wear down on him to keep up his mask.

Ekko and Jinx have a lot of parallels but they also have a handful of differences that tie into those parallels as well. One is that while Jinx remained stagnant despite her getting older, Ekko was forced to grow up too quick to survive the harshness of Zaun, you can even make a case that the nickname "little man" is a reference to this.

The stress of leading the firelights

The stress of protecting his parents(if their still alive)

The years of anger and cynicism he's tried to control and bury down only letting it pop out in short bursts

He may even feel some guilt on how shitty things have gotten, after all he was the one who told the gang about Jayces apartment, he was the one who couldn't save Benzo or Jinx

The years of loneliness even within the Firelights

All these things eating away at his mind, trying to claw their way out and it finally happens after him and Jinx are alone.

It could be after a particularly bad Firelight mission. Ekko and Jinx are in his room and he's chewing her out about how reckless she's being. The argument spirals and soon Jinx taunts him about how perfect he is and about how he thinks he's above everyone else and finally that mask that he so carefully constructed after years falls off. It doesn't even fall off, it full on cracks and shatters into the earth. He yells "YOU DON'T THINK IM SCARED TOO!!!" this startles Jinx because this is the first time Ekko has raised his voice up to at least this volume.

Ekkos mask is truly gone at this and all these bottled up emotions are in the forefront. He starts to tell Jinx about how he's scared every time he goes into Zaun, how he's not like her and Vi and how they can jump into Zaun and fight whatever they need to get what they want. How he's always scared, always scared of something going wrong, always scared of bringing back another corpse and his perfectionist tendencies amplify this. He talks about how being the leader of the Firelights scares him, how he knows that no matter what happens if one of them dies it's his fault because he's the one who took them in, he's the one who taught them how to ride the hoverboards and use the crystal grenades, he's the one who has supposed to protect them but yet he couldn't. He didn't sign up to be a leader and he doesn't even know if it's worth it anymore or if he even wants to do this anymore.

He laughs bitterly and it's like he's talking to himself now. He mocks the nickname Jinx gave him 'Boy Savior" how ironic because he can't seem to save anyone, how he couldn't save Benzo, or VI or Jinx. Hes talking more calmly now but it's a defeated tone and this strikes at Jinx's heart, it's like a loss of light has happened within the room. Ekko says that he sometimes wishes he stayed on the bridge with Jinx, sure he would've died but at least it would be over, the pain, suffering, anger, regret, it would all be over. He says sometimes the best dreams he would have is when Jinx would finally shoot him, he points to his chest "right through here" he says. It would be a perfect ending, the naive boy being taken down by the harsh reality of the world. This is starting to scare Jinx, she has never heard him talk like this....and she doesn't like it...not one bit.

Ekko is sitting on the bed at this point slumped over his knees, "Every time I walk past a mirror or a broken window or glass, I don't see a leader, a spark of hope or even a man....all I see is a little boy still clinging onto something that left him long ago. A little boy who's still afraid of the dark, a little boy who's still afraid of monsters" he looks up at Jinx with an expression that threatens to tear her heart out of her chest. Ekko always looked tired but this was something else, he was tired of everything, of the Firelights, of Zaun, Of Piltover, of everything "all those years I've spent fighting.....was it even worth it....is it still worth it.....I'm tired Jinx....I'm so so so tired" Ekko slumped back in his seated position again "...I'm sorry for yelling at you ji-".

Before he can finish his sentence, Jinx comes and sits on his lap and wraps her arms around his head and nuzzles him into her chest. He plays with his hair a bit and whispers things like "I'm sorry"and "it's okay, it's okay, I'm here" Ekko tries to talk but Jinx shushes him and holds him tighter "just let me hold you, let me love you" and Ekko quietly sobs while clutching onto her too.

I also like the idea that Ekko has Dark Impulses but doesn't act on them. Ekko is shown to be a very capable fighter so I have no doubt he could kill someone if he wanted to, i can imagine him having to hold himself back from doing it and those impulses could be worked into his break down. He starts to describe what he's thought about doing to the chembaron and chemgang members, some of what he says even disturbs Jinx.

Thanks to @starry-nights12 for giving me the idea!

[rowretro]

✧𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐍 𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐍✧

WARNINGS: non I know of

✧taglist✧: @heeseung-min @jaeneohee @lovingvoidgoatee @neruishoon (anyone I may have missed)

✧CHAPTER 14✧

"Babe maybe we should get something in the garden for them to play with~" y/n said with a smile "Like a big playhouse to play in?" he asked as y/n gasped "Omg that's so cute!" she smiled as she turned to the babies that were giggling at some Halloween decorations. "Babe we have to be nicer-" y/n warned as Sunghoon frowned "Im not saying anything mean, i just said the word mean, how is that not nice enough coming from me?" Sunghoon reasoned as y/n frowned at him.

"Babe look! a princess castle... Wait no- look at that one- barbie's dreamhouse!" Y/n pointed out as Sunghoon ruffled her hair. "Honestly I think it's perfect, 3 stories, big enough for the twins to spend time in, something we can work on together~" Sunghoon sang, as he smiled at the girl. "Aw Sunghoon you're so fucking cute when you're happy, why can't you be happy all the timeeee?" y/n pouted as Sunghoon rolled his eyes.

And in perfect timing, a certain someone appeared before her and Sunghoon. "Ah Sunghoon~ and if it isn't the pretty y/n~" Yeonjun complimented. Y/n nervously laughed knowing how possessive Sunghoon gets when a man compliments his y/n, his hands balling into fists, "mama~" Avaani whined, wanting to get carried, the girl smiles, picking up the baby. "Ah so you finally gave birth, wow I haven't seen you in so long then Hooners... If you're done shopping may I treat you to lunch?" Yeonjun asked with a sweet, fake smile as y/n turned to Sunghoon.

"Babe? Will you be ok with that? maybe seeing your kind brother the kids will be kind too!" y/n pointed out, still clueless about the little conflict between the 2 brothers "I see your wife says yes~" he smirked as Sunghoon held back his anger "Babe, we'll grab a quick meal and leave straight after." Sunghoon simply said not liking the idea of Yeonjun  one bit.

God all the things he was holding back from doing, feeling the girls’ eyes on him. Sunghoon watched as Yeonjun flirted lowkey, and how he checked her out so shamelessly, purposely pissing Sunghoon off by getting a little touchy with y/n. Yeonjun  was really asking for it. Watching y/n cluelessly smile and converse with his brother was pretty tough to put up with, but hearing Yeonjun mildly slip in some filthy compliments in a sugar coated manner pissed the male off more.

Sunghoon ordered himself a hot drink as he busied himself with baby Anaya who was still awake. The baby softly gripped onto Sunghoon’s finger, her curious eyes meeting Sunghoon’s. The man’s heart fluttered at how adorable his baby girl was, smiling as he let her shake his hand around. He was still keeping an eye on Yeonjun though, not trusting him one bit. “Hmm maybe you should come by my bar some day” Yeonjun randomly said as Sunghoon immediately turned to him, glaring at the smirking demon before him. Before Sunghoon could even say a word, y/n spoke up with a smile.

“I’m afraid I have to turn down your offer… me and Hoon will be busy with the babies, and any free time we get, we like to spend alone… sorry” She kindly apologize, as Sunghoon turned back to the babies, smiling. Not only did she turn down the offer, but she called him Hoon, god that girl is so cute. However, Sunghoon was still wary, what if she simply turned it down because she wanted to avoid being locked in the basement?....

"Awww look at Avaani, she's sleeping while hugging Anaya's arm" y/n cooed as baby Anaya whined softly, trying to pull out of her sister's grip. Sunghoon softly, pulled the baby away, treating them as if they were delicate little angels, as if even the tiniest mistake would snap them. "Bit of a selfish sister eh? sort of like Sunghoon" Yeonjun joked as he stared at baby Anaya.

Some joke that was. It's clear, Yeonjun hated those babies as they were a result of Sunghoon and y/n, and Sunghoon was no stranger to this greedy bitch side of Yeonjun. The nerve to even make a comment on one of his angels. Sunghoon opens his extremely hot drink and accidentally spills it on Yeonjun, with a smirk. "oops... accident my bad." He simply said as the two demons glared at each other, their red eyes glowing like a fire opal gem put in the sunlight.

"Babe- I think we should head home, babies are sleepy..." Y/n said as Sunghoon turned to her, the red in his eyes long gone. "Kay lets head home sweetheart, we can build the castle while they sleep" he said with a smile as he got up, making sure the babies were safe inside the pushchair before leaving the building, his hands on the pushchair as he forced y/n to walk in the tiny space between him and his pushchair, not liking his angels being away from him for even just a split second...

✧𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐍 𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐍✧

[beansmakesthings]

im so sorry but constance is not a mom friend 😔 thats the entire point of her arc i fear 😔 ur art is incredible but strong disagree with that one thing

You're more than welcome to disagree with me! Much like how I'm going to disagree that the entire point of her arc is that she's not a mom friend.

I personally always understood Constance's arc to be focused on her people pleasing tendencies and how, trying to act like someone she's not and letting everyone walk all over her, became a very toxic and painful loathing for herself, her town, and her parents. She had so much anger and pain bottled up inside of her and she felt trapped and it turned into self destructive behaviour.

But the accident put everything in perspective for Constance. She's allowed to be nice to people without letting them hurt her. She doesn't have to hate her town to please others until it becomes a fact, she doesn't have to let people walk all over her, and despite how apathetic and despondent she had become towards her life, there was more beauty than she ever stopped to consider.

None of this stuff means that Constance can't be a 'mom friend'. Especially because a mom friend to me is just someone who will go get you ketchup if you're too nervous to ask or has extra tampons or advil incase a friend needs.

Constance accepts and embraces her role as the nicest girl in town in Sugar Cloud, but she redefines what that role means. She displays by the end of the show how she's not afraid to stand up for herself anymore and how she knows that she deserves to be treated better. You can look out for and want to take care of the people you love without letting them be assholes to you. Constance can be a mom friend without letting people treat her like garbage.

That's just my personal take, but I'd love to hear your thoughts on the matter!

[bunnakit]

last twilight ep 5 thoughts feelings etc.

eyy actually watched this earlier and rewatching it, so things should be a little less feral and unhinged. actually took notes my first watch through as well (wtf am i doing)

once again i love how stories are our constant companions in this show. i love how they keep playing with the parallels between worlds, it's one of my absolute favorite things in storytelling.

i love the fact that day is now 'invisible' in the world of badminton but he can still experience all of the joy of the game by supporting his friends. badminton was such a big part of his life and he doesn't have to leave it all behind, he just experiences it a little differently now.

film is so fucking pretty even covered in 'sweat.' i do love the show let her be 'sweaty' and disheveled instead of having perfect hair and make up after what was clearly a hard game. GIVE ME SWEATY WOMEN. (god im so gay)

so i said it last week but the only time we've ever seen mhok be violent is when he's been protecting the people close to him. (his garage bro, porjai x 2, etc) and we see him ready to do it again when august confronts day. there is no doubt in my mind that mhok was fully prepared to bury that bitch for even daring to make day the slightest bit afraid.

and god how scary does that have to be? you can't see, you're already nervous to be here, and suddenly someone is shouting at you - and maybe you don't recognize them at first because you haven't heard their voice in over a year but all you know is they're coming closer and they're so angry. i can't imagine anything scarier than that.

ahh, a broken picture frame representing a broken bond, an absolute classic metaphor. an oldie but a goodie.

once again i love that we see day's rage. anger really is such a big part of coming to terms with being disabled. i got some bad news a few weeks ago about my own disease and i've spent the last few weeks so angry and frustrated and then just sad. it's such a complex journey and the show is doing an absolutely brilliant job of showing that.

i do owe day's family a small smidgen of an apology since day is the one that asked it to be kept a secret, HOWEVER, i do think that conversation should have been revisited after a fucking year. how long were they just going to let him live in isolation? like cool for respecting his agency, not cool for letting him waste away in a tomb of his own making.

FINALLY WE GET MHOK OPENING UP.

so here's the thing with mhok. i love him. no - the real thing is i see so much of myself in him. my friends and family constantly get frustrated with me because i will never tell them when something is wrong or when i'm shouldering a lot of emotions about something. when i got the bad news about my disease i hid in my office and cried at my desk and then cleaned myself up and pretended nothing happened. fuck, i feel like i understand mhok on such a deep level.

not to get too into it but my own habits stem from neglect in my formative years, and i have to wonder if mhok's behavior maybe stems from his isolation in prison? oftentimes people with these behavior patterns will self isolate, either deal with or bury their emotions, and then emerge back into their friend group as if nothing happened. (am i talking about myself again? shhh.) mhok didn't really have a choice - sure you can write letters, have visitors, but a large part of his day was probably handling his grief in solitude. he's probably gotten so good at "handling it" and pushing everything down and dealing with everything in silence that he doesn't know how to handle it any other way now.

to make things worse, it happened over a year ago. he probably feels like he should be "over it" and not make it a big deal. maybe i'm projecting just a smidge (just a lot) but i do think it's something interesting to keep in mind. either way, him finally talking about rung to day is fucking MASSIVE, both for their relationship and mhok's emotional wellbeing.

august is fucking king of mixed signals and i don't super like that he looked for mhok's permission to lead day through the court. why the fuck are you looking at mhok when you could just ask day? if you look closely, as mhok is letting go day curls his fingers around the hand that mhok uses to remove his hand from his arm.

i do love we see mhok pushing day a little more out of his comfort zone as he did in earlier episodes.

porjai is so fucking pretty. is there anything more attractive than a woman in shorts and an oversized band tee? no. no there is not.

and again we see how much time and effort mhok has put into being day's caretaker - and his friend. he did research and learned methods that would make dining out easier for day. i love him so much! i don't know how day could still be thinking about august after that adorable little date.

UGH OKAY SO. HERE'S WHERE WE GET INTO MY BIG FEELINGS.

in my opinion, the theme of this episode has been "being late." here's why.

the boys were very nearly, or were, late to gee's badminton game

you could consider mhok 'late' to tell day about rung

day thinks he's too late to confess to august

mhok realizes he's come into day's life too late to receive his affection

and then we have august's literal late arrival (i still dont know what fucking game this jackass is playing)

this also ties in to a little trend i've been noticing in regards to mhok that oftentimes he's too late in life.

he was too late to save rung, and learned of her death late

he was too late to receive the mechanic job as it had 'already been given to someone else'

he was a late arrival to the interview to become day's caretaker

and again, he's entered day's life too late to receive his affection (or so he thinks)

i genuinely don't know if this is intentional, but i think it's something interesting to draw connections to.

anyway, again, i dont know what the fuck august's deal is but i can tell you if i was day i'd be getting over my feelings for him real fucking quick. i don't super like that august shows up, hears about day's feelings, and asks mhok to keep his being there a secret - but i do understand it and i do understand mhok's side of things. i don't think he does it out of his own selfishness, i think rather he realizes august likely doesn't return day's affection and letting him think august didn't show up is possibly the kinder of the two scenarios. (my only hope is we don't see august return and try to woo day or something later with this knowledge)

i do love that mhok stayed. he was concerned and it might seem a little overbearing but day was clearly nervous for this outing and all in all it's good that he stayed. and then he made sure to salvage the evening for day and take him out on a proper date. maybe it's not the date day wanted but it looks like he had a great time (perhaps even a better time) spending a day with someone he could relax and be himself around.

flowers have so many different meanings across cultures and tbh i'm far to tired to dig into the thai meaning of hydrangeas (if there are any) but i do think hydrangeas are neat. this is prob common knowledge but the color of hydrangea petals is determined by the ph balance in the soil they're grown in. (blue hydrangeas grow in soil with a ph balance of 5.2-5.5, far more in the base range than red hydrangeas that grow in a ph balance of 6.0-6.2, and once the soil reaches acidic levels it tends to produce pink flowers) i guess maybe if you wanted you could draw a connection to how malleable mhok is becoming and how his environment is changing him.

scientifically, sunflowers are also an interesting flower because they are often used to heal damaged and irradiated soil. they're so fucking resilient and help heal the world around them. i think there's a lot of connections we can make there with both mhok and day, regardless of flower symbolism and going purely on science.

anyway sorry to be a science nerd.

that's all ive really got for this episode, i say, as if i have not written you all a novel. this show continues to make me feel so much and tickle my brain in such a delightful way. between this and moonlight chicken p'aof has definitely made me a fan for life.

tag loves: @benkaaoi | @callipigio | @lookwhatihave (once again pls always feel free to lmk if you want to be added or removed)

[loveackermannn]

Oh I love the Vamp Levi feeding of reader but what if reader is human and she's not willing to be a vampire (I love being human ok forgive me😭 This idea was been running around my head since TWILIGHT!) but yeahhh I love and WILLINGLY be feed off the one and only Levi even thou my anemic ass would collapse seconds later 🍷✨

anon have u peeked into my mind because twilight is one of my favorite movie series!! (vamp!levi was briefly inspired by edward actually! ><)

but to answer your ask, i feel like levi could live without ever feeding off of you. he can always resort to hunting in a nearby woods for animals and that'll be the end of it. he never wants to pressure you in doing something you're not comfortable with or ready for. he'll wait a thousand years if he has to, as long as you're safe and healthy, that's all that matters to him.

that's not to say that he does get tempted from time to time though.. he has a good resistance and self control but when it comes to you and the way you unintentionally tease him with your neck exposed just for his viewing, it becomes difficult to be around you sometimes. during passionate and intimate moments, he can't help but graze his teeth along the side of your neck, though never applies pressure to actually pierce the skin – he'll always make sure of that. and in other times when it gets all too much for him, he'll disappear for a while, leaving a note by your bedside in reassurance that everything's okay and that he just needs to hunt for a few days.

days and days passed, without ever hearing from levi since he left. it was agonizing being alone in the confines of your cottage, you miss his scent that lingered everywhere you walked, you miss his tender embraces that hold you for just a little longer in the early mornings, you just miss him.

and abruptly, all your wishes and prayers were granted when you saw a figure standing by the front of your doorway, a shadow casted in all too familiar stature of your beloved. all at once, you wanted to be angry with him for leaving you like that, isolated and afraid – yet, you were overjoyed to know that his presence was reunited with yours once again.

"where have you been. i've been waiting for you.." as much as you tried to lace anger with your words, it was almost as difficult to do as trying to keep your composure in front of levi – it didn't go unnoticed by him either.

"i was w-worried sick. do you understand what was running through my mind these past few days?? how.. how scared i was?!" at this point, it was impossible to try and hold back anymore. bitter tears streamed down your face as levi's casted shadow grew closer to you. you soon felt warm, yet cold hands reach for your own and tug you against his chest.

he'd be lying if he said he wasn't a complete idiot for leaving you behind – he really was. he shushed you through soft coos of his voice and sweet apologies that were very much needed in this moment.

"i'm sorry, my love. i only wanted to keep you safe. im really sorry."

☆ — 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭: @saenora , @youre-ackermine , @lovolee3 , @notgoodforlife , @averysmolbear , @bejewelledd , @leviismybby , @evas-leslas , @roseofdarknessblog @cometlevi , @21aurora , @leviykwim (! ! 𝐩𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐠𝐨 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐛𝐨𝐱 𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞 𝐚 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐝💌)

[lyxvija]

heard you wanna ramble about our bug bf huh? GO AHEAD!! make it angsty.... here's my suggestion HUEHEUEHUE im feeling evil.

s/o sees him getting touchy with the twins, its just his nature, but they're jealous, they try to get at him, fail miserably. and when they confront each other He's already in a pissy mood after a long day of work, maybe he yells at them, maybe tries to dismiss them, they're not communicating, throwing accusations at each other.

OR MAYBE! he's gone too long and been too busy at work and can't spend much time with his s/o and so they try to discuss it with him but he's too tired and grumpy to hear it.

OR EVEN THIS!!! The twins or someone get into his head, telling him that s/o only wnats him for his money

I CAN THINK OF SO MUCH SJDJDJEJRJRJR

or maybe even get a lil

freaky

iykwim 👀

ramble to us pookie wookie 🤭🫶🏻 /pos /gen /friendly

i think ill go with being the 🪐 anon just future reference 🫶🏻

Okay powerful magic spaceball floating in the universe Anon...

HEAR ME OUT. I already had a similar scenario like that in mind one month ago and PLANNED to write a one-shot about something like that! >: D If it's okay, I´d like to do that one now. <3You get:

Mammon x Gen! Neutral Reader TAGS: Cheating, kinda break-up, ANGST

Mam and Reader have a fight, Mammon makes a horrible mistake and now has to pay the price.

Edit: I went overboard...accidentally wrote half of a one-shot. XD

So this is part one.. hahahahah

Mammon and you were a thing now. Well, for quite some time. You were overjoyed when the King of Greed seemed to get interested in you. It wasn't easy, not gonna lie, but you two managed. Mammon wasn't the easiest to be around, but somehow, you still loved him regardless. Despite what your friends told you, it felt genuine. Like he really meant it and didn't see you as some kind of arm candy or pet to keep just for fun. Your heart told you that, so you simply ignored everyone's remarks.

Mammon was extremely jealous and possessive. There was hardly any moment when you interacted with somebody else, where he didn't feel the need to step in and show the other that you were his. At home (well his home since the mighty king would never spend any second in your shitty apartment so he just took you with him) he often made nasty remarks of how dude A surely had the hots for you or that gal B was just after you to get closer to him. It was absolutely ridiculous! Every time you told him that this was not true, that you only have eyes for him, even if somebody else WOULD have a crush on you. In some way you even felt flattered that a Deadly Sin would be so protective over an unimportant hellborn like you.

But GOSH, one day he even went wild because you talked to the Glam sister. For real?! Yes, Glitz had been frisky, but hell! They are flirty and cocky with everyone! No matter how much you tried to ensure him that you DID NOT have a thing for them and that they were in no way any danger to you and him, Mammon´s jealousy and anger never seemed to fade.

"Yeah? If ya really aint fallin for their jiggly boobs, why did you smile at them and oh bring them some fucking coffee?! And by the way, I SAW HOW YOU LOOKED AT GLAM´S FAT ASS!!"

You stared at him for a second. "Excuse me??"

"YEAH DUH! I KNOW WHAT I SAW AND DONT LIE TO ME, CAUSE I KNOW YOU ENJOYED IT!"

Again, you stared at him in disbelief. "Wtf? First, I smile at them because I am just being nice to them! Second, where the hell am I supposed to look when they ask me which of their butts are bigger? And third-"

"THEY FUCKING ASKED WHAT?!" Mammon screamed in his demonic voice, steam pouring out of his mouth with every breath. He pinned you against the wall. Eight eyes of glowing green bore down onto you.

You should have been afraid, but couldn't help to feel another thing:

You felt offended.

Baring your in comparison way smaller teeth, you hissed at him. "For hell´s sake! Get your shit together Mammon! Fuking belive me when I tell you that nothing happened!" Your sudden outburst seemed to have startled him. Never had you snapped at him like that.

"Why would you even believe I would do such a thing?! Don't you trust me??"

The big Jester fumbled with his words, but managed to grumble under his breath: "How the fuck am I supposed to know.. I mean-"

"How are you supposed to know? Are you serious?? Gosh! Because I tell you every god damn day! Maybe that´s how!"

Now he just stood there, clenching his fists and facing the floor. His expression sour. "I jus´ don't like sharing you with others... okay?"

Your posture softens and you put your hand on one of his lower arms.

"It´s okay. I know you have difficulties with that, Babe. I am sure we can work this out. Okay?" <3

He was quiet for a few seconds but then answered: "Yeah...but could you please talk less to them? You know... it is making me angry."

You inhaled and held your breath, trying to hold back your frustration. It was obvious it wouldn't be easy with him, but you honestly would expect a bit more from an immortal entity than acting like a damn man-child. A Mam-child. Oh dear...

"No, sorry can not do. I work with them. I have to at least talk to them. Besides, you have to learn to trust me. You can't force me to keep away from people only because you want me to. This is not how it works!"

Mammon huffed, gripped your shoulders and drew your face close to his. "Listen, you little brat, I am really trying here! So cut me some slack and get your cute little ass off and away from them." His voice was low and threatening. This was in no way a suggestion. This was a demand.

"No." you said firmly and looked him deep in the eyes.

"No?" he repeated. Sparks danced around his features. Mammon tried to intimidate you just like he did with all of his employees and servants. But you were no servant. While the tone and his looming presence made your heart race and your knees weak, you still refused to give it. While it was true that you were just a measly hellborn in comparison to a mighty entity like him, but last time you checked you were his lover. His little gold nugget.

"I said no! You cannot tell me what to do and who to stay away from...just like I could never tell you to stay off the Glam sisters. I saw how they try to get in the sheets with you! But do I make a fuss about it? No!"

Mammon started to laugh. "Ya think I can´t tell you what to do? Pleeeaaase. I am your boss AND your king! If I tell you to get me some coffee, you bring me some coffee, If I tell you to hold my golden staff while I take a shit, you better do so and if I tell you to not get anywhere near those slutty cunts, you better do!"

He painfully clenched your cheeks between his thumb and index finger. You stared at him wide-eyed, trying to pry his hand off you.

"Did I make myself clear or do I have to repeat?"

It was the first time you had ever felt afraid of him. With his smirk twisted into a sadistic grin and his green glowing eyes staring down at you, there was no trace of your sweet boyfriend. The intensity of his glare was too much for you to handle

With panic growing inside your chest, you yelled at him. "Let me go! NOW!"

"As you wish." Mammon released you at once, making you fall down to the floor.

You rubbed your behind and looked up at him. Tears started to well in your eyes. His words and the way he treated you, shocked you.

Mammon huffed offended and frowned. "Tsk! Come on! Now that didn't hurt."

"You... You can't treat me like this! You are my boyfriend, remember? You can´t treat me like some sort of...like.." you stuttered, holding back your tears. What hurt the most the disinterested look he gave you. How he dismissed your feelings. Somehow it scared you even more that he didn't even give a shit of the effect he had on you right now.

"Now listen here, cunt! I can do whatever I want and with whoever I want! What do you think? That you have some kind of power over me? is that what you´re thinking? Is that what gets you off?? Hah! is that why you spend your fucking breaks with these other vermin instead of coming to my office? Oh yeah! You must feel so fucking powerful making ol´ Mammon pissed-"

"THAT IS NOT TRUE! THAT IS NOT TRUE!" You shouted, tears still streaming down your cheeks. You were disturbed of the absolute paranoia, the things he told himself, the way he thought about you. It was like someone put a knife in your heart and stirred it.

"LIKE I GIVE A BLOODY SHIT OF WHAT YOU THINK!! YOU THINK YOU CAN DO ANYTHING NOW, DONTCHA?! THAT YOU ARE BETTER THAN ME? THAT YOU CAN DO WITH ME WHATEVER YA WANT JUST BECAUSE WE SHARE A BED AND YOU SUCK MY DICK?? BUT GUESS WHAT! I CAN DO WHAT I WANT AND YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT SHOULD BE GRATEFUL FOR WHAT YOU GOT!!"

Your heart almost stopped hearing insult after insult. He was out of his mind. You couldn't even comprehend what he was saying. What is happening here?! How did things escalate so quickly??

"Okay... I am going home.. and you.. you.. calm down." You tried so hard to sound steady but failed miserably. Your sobbing kept on interrupting. "W-We talk.. tomorrow."

With that, you turned around and left. You didn't even try to hide your pathetic crying.

[pretty-chaotic-world]

if my BPD can scream

1. I wish i could have a normal love... but no, my brain wants to worship every little detail of you until it drives me insane

2. sorry i pushed you away i felt abandoned and suicidal 

3. I’m sick of going to bed and knowing things won’t be better tomorrow 

4. I'll ask you thousands times if you really love, please don't get annoyed

5. I'll create "drama" and mishaps only to feel like I'm in home

6. i’m afraid that one day my anger will overshadow the little love i still have left for the world

7. I feel numb. No tears, no anger, nothing. Just going through the same day again and again. I would rather just sleep without waking up.

8. I'm so tired of everytime one small argument or inconvenience breaks out I want to end it and self destruct, it's so draining. 

9. I want to stop feeling anything and when i actually don't it breaks my heart but I can't cry it out.

10. "its all in your head" well duh where tf else is it gonna be??? in my fucking kidneys????

11. I am constantly between wanting people to care about me and wanting them not to so I can hurt myself without feeling guilty 

12. Psychiatrist told me there is no cure for bpd and I've to change myself. Well why cant they just let me die then?

13. Until you live with bpd you'll never know what it's like to be too much and not enough at the same time.

14. i know im constantly too much for everyone but sometimes i just want to be enough for someone

15. if he will leave me, my next diagnosis will be of "sociopath"

16. im so jealous of all the people who see him and touch him and talk to him every single day it should be me me me me 

17. oh I got my hair coloured. why? because I can't hurt myself anymore 

18. "you're so distant" because you can't handle my abandonment issues.

19. My younger self disappoint me a lot. like why were you begging people to stay in your life? ohh no worries I know the answer

20. I wanna throw a plate against the wall, stab a knife through my hand, destroy my laptop with a hammer, smash my door in with an axe and spray graffiti all over the walls of my room 

21. Why shouldn’t I be mad? Why can’t I just be angry and be allowed to feel it? Why can’t I burn everything down?

22. I have to watch my mouth every fucking second to make sure I don't destroy every relation I have coz apparently social life matters!!

23. Isnt it fucked up how he got away with every horrible thing he made me experience and I’m the one who has to live with myself feeling absolutely fucking worthless 

24. I don't deserve food and love. im a horrible person.

25. this is how my eating cycle goes

feeling weak coz i haven't ate anything -> eat -> purge -> feeling guilty after purging -> eat more -> feeling guilty after eating so much -> cry coz you don't know what's happening

26. the diagnosis makes me believe I'm not insane just lil emo ig!! NOOOO YOU'RE INSANE

27. “don’t let it bother u” baby i’m gonna be bothered by this for the next 10 years 

28. if I tell you I love you its equivalent to I can kill someone for you

29. Actually upon further inspection that shit really hurt my feelings 

30. I don't dive into insecurity anymore, i drown in self-loathe

31. i shut up in between group convo coz I know I'll talk invaluable shit and nobody really cares what I say until it's psychology class

32. "if you are fully aware of yourself, why do you keep acting like that?" slapping self awareness on top of bpd only grants the ability to watch yourself self-destruct straight from the vip section thats all it does literally

33. “Where do you see yourself in the future” building a cult for mentally ill people 

34. ofc I've a praise kind i was ignored as a child

35. I'm much better than I was before. you know why coz I don't to air now and don't see monsters walking by side all the time

36. No I don't want to self harm anymore I need to kill that fucking monster

37. Don't mind me, I'm just casually sabotaging all my positive relationships with negative delusions because my life doesn't feel real unless something dramatic and destructive is constantly occurring 

38. i don’t care i don’t care i don’t care (im going to sob my fucking eyes out)

39. “Stop making your disorder your personality” I have a fucking personality disorder for god sake

40. turning my mental illnesses into kinks and calling it the BDSM-5 

41. "destroy something precious while you're in rage" ohh yeaa and then I'll do that again and again 

42. what I hate most about my BPD is the fact that I have started doubting every emotion that I’ve ever felt in my life, whether it’s love, my grief through multiple traumas, or my anger, & it’s so saddening. It has actually led me to start questioning my reality.

43. if I need medication to stay alive, am I really meant to be here?

44. it's either be alone without 75% of my symptoms, or be with someone and display the most horrendous unstable awful version of myself. why do i have to choose between love & happiness or peace & stability?

45. That fucking bpd rage where everyone's voices makes you want to scream and every noise around you makes you want to sh and you're so mad you can almost feel the cuts everywhere 

46. getting worked up to the point of becoming physically ill (throwing up/stomach issues etc) because you felt rejected/abandoned by your favourite person  

47. i wish my trauma made me kind as everyone says but i’m becoming what i fear the most- a monster.

48. imagine getting diagnosed with a personality disorder and the only visible representation of that disorder is an animated horse man, a sociopathic sitcom character from philadelphia, and darth vader

[innytoes]

make more dark fantasy AU. please. pretty please. sugar please. there are children crying. Its me im children crying

I mean same, anon.

-Caleb just being completely obsessed with the jazz beat Alex showed him. He's pretty sure that's why it took so 'long' for the fairy to turn on him, he loved jazz.

-Alex was supposed to learn the drums to play in a nice, wholesome, Christian marching band and do the military drum beats for the army parades and scouts stuff but he learned the Fun Cool Music on the sly.

-The first several years Alex was in the fairy realm, he and Willie never exchanged a word. Like, when he was still having a good time, he'd spot Willie from across the room and think he was pretty, but he was always whisked away by a fairy who wanted to dance with him or Caleb who wanted him to play drums.

-Once he realises he made a big mistake, and it's too late to run, and his feet keep moving without his permission, his face in a smile that isn't his own, that's when he and Willie finally make contact. Every time he's nearing his breaking point and thinking he's going to go insane, Willie is there, whisking him out of someone else's arms, feeding him honey cakes, dancing with him to a song he hums in Alex' ear, slow and sweet and not at all what the music around them is, and he's practically holding Alex' body up, letting him rest.

-It's not until Caleb and the faeries disappear on some kind of hunt, who knows how long after, and he finally has control over his own limbs again, that Willie speaks. And then it's only a "come with me" as he leads Alex away, gently holding on to his fingers. And what is Alex going to do, not follow?

-They end up in some kind of room with a bed made out of moss. One of the musicians he saw was also there, already asleep, and oh god, there's more humans here? Willie just urged him into the bed and gently tucks him in and curls around him, and he's not sure how long they sleep but when he's woken up it's frantic and the boy with the lute - Luke, he introduces himself hastily - is dragging him up and away because its best not to keep Caleb waiting and he shouted he wanted music.

-Over the months, years, decades, he can't tell, he slowly learns more about who Luke and Willie are. Other humans come and go, and Alex sees just what can happen to the ones who do not stay on the fae's good side.

-Let's just say Caleb does Not like disco.

-Willie gets away with a lot more than the other humans can. And some of the lower ranking fairies seem to be almost afraid of him. Alex can never figure out quite how Caleb sees him though. Sometimes he acts like Willie is his child - usually when he wants affection or admiration - sometimes like Willie is a pet, and sometimes, the worst times, he takes his anger out on Willie in a way that is sometimes subtle, sometimes overt, and always terrifying.

-Once they live with the Molinas, Reggie is just dying to introduce the guys to things like Pizza and Poptarts and poprocks.

-The boys have very fucked up sleep schedules. Sometimes they don't sleep for days. Sometimes, worryingly, they do. Sometimes they sleep for 12 hours, raid the fridge, and go nap for another four.

-Willie biting into a pear and realising pears and pixie pears taste VERY different: excuse me but what the fuck is this?

He makes Reggie taste it and Reggie is like: yeah sorry buddy that's just what pears taste like here.

-On the other hand, pineapple is a new and exciting thing. For Luke, too, honestly.

-Carlos introduces him to Pixie Stix which have nothing to do with actual pixies but are Really Good and if you have 15 of them you have So Much Energy!!!!

-Willie being a Disney Princess. He can talk to birds. He makes friends with neighbourhood cats. Ray has a long conversation about how animal friends are outdoor friends after he came downstairs to find Willie on the sofa petting a raccoon in his lap and sharing a carrot with it.

-Look, Ray isn't saying now that he knows his kids have some kind of fairy changeling lineage that he's noticing things but... sometimes they are weirdly lucky, just like Rose was.

-And he's never had a green thumb... Rose's plant wall in the studio was close to death, until Carlos started going into the studio again. And they didn't truly perk up until Julie started playing music there again.

(Or maybe that's because Ray stopped overwatering the plants after Willie talked to him.)

-Reggie knows that he's not the only one with nightmares and trauma, okay, he knows that, but none of the other boys were hunted for sport and none of them have his weird aversion to horn sounds and bows and arrows. It makes things really awkward when Julie tries to show him nerdy movies he missed, like Lord of the Rings or the Hunger Games.

-Ray reads a lot of books and guides and studies on trauma informed parenting and how to help the boys, because he's pretty sure telling a therapist 'I was kidnapped to the fairy realm' is not going to give the kids the help they need.

-When Luke and Julie start dating, he's happy for them, though he does do the strict dad routine. Even though Luke is very old fashioned in a way that is charming and a little hilarious at times, given that his perception has been warped by hundreds of years of fae revelries. (Orgies? Eh, whatever. Getting to hold Julie's hand? Life changing, huge step.)

-The other guys seem happy for him. But the first time Luke falls asleep in Julie's room - innocently song writing, but he hadn't slept in two days and Julie's voice was so pretty and her bed was so soft - and she lets him stay, he wakes up to find the other boys demonstratively piled up on the floor around Julie's bed.

-Because Willie can't sleep without Luke there, so he bodily carried an already sleeping Alex to Julie's room. He was just about to go back for Reggie, but Reggie doesn't like sleeping alone either so he followed, dragging one of their blankets with him. And yeah, Julie has some explaining to do to Ray when he finds them like that the next morning. (The door was open! Luke was on top of the covers and she wasn't! They weren't even facing each other, dad!)

-Willie not quite knowing what to feel because on the one hand, relationships were very fluid among the fae and it's not like he has issues sharing. He never minded sharing Luke with Alex or Reggie. But then they were all together, and now, Luke and Julie keep disappearing together.

-And he's had Luke in his life the longest, and he doesn't know what to do with this new feeling inside him that makes him want to grab Luke and keep him away from everyone except his boys. And then he has a realisation that he's just like Caleb and he maybe hides out in the loft of the studio until Alex and Reggie find him and coax him down.

-Alex soothes him that he's nothing like Caleb, that being a little jealous when one of your friends pulls back because he's head over heels for someone is normal. That's the word for his feelings. Jealous.

-Reggie is very silent, and Willie flops on him and stares at him until Reggie starts petting his hair. And he realises that maybe Reggie is also jealous of Luke and Julie. And then he thinks back at how many times he and Alex have gone off on their own and thinks maybe Reggie is jealous of him and Alex as well. There's no more revelries where they are all together anymore. He should fix that. He doesn't want Reggie to feel what he's feeling.

-He makes extra sure to cuddle Reggie during that night's 'watching the tellyvision'. It also distracts him from wanting to hiss at Julie when she snuggles up to Luke and pull him away.

-Asking Ray about hosting revelries goes badly. He's pretty sure the modern human word for it is 'buzz kill'.

-As a compromise, Ray hosts a 'pizza party' which Willie is pretty sure is not comparable. He wants to pout, but then Ray mentions you can put pineapple on pizza and he's distracted.

-He talks to Alex about it all, because Alex is better at feelings and thinking. Reggie says he's better at Overthinking but Willie is pretty sure he's just jealous Alex can think of all the bad outcomes of their plans before they do them. (It doesn't stop them, but sometimes Alex does get to say 'I told you so', which is funny.)

-Alex tries to explain that things are different in the human world, that romantic and sexual relationships are between two people, usually. Alex is very cagey about answering Willie's question about whether or not he misses the other two boys, but finally Willie drags it out of him that yes, he does. But he also wants to be normal, and being with four people isn't normal, and he loves Willie and what they have.

-In response Willie pushes him through a wall, just to remind him they're Not Normal, and says they should kiss Reggie and Luke at the pizza party.

-Alex splutters and says they should ask first. He is also very insistent that there will be Nothing More Than Kissing at the pizza party, and Willie pouts. Ray already had that talk with him, thanks. Humans were so weird, they invented the most amazing ways to have fun (skateboards! Tellyvisions! Dubstep!) but were so boring in other areas.

-The pizza party was a success. He and Luke were Very Excited about the Pineapple Pizza. Reggie looked in heaven. Even Alex seemed to forget he was nervous about tonight as he stuffed an entire slice of pizza into his face. Alex was so talented.

-So around the last slice he asks Reggie if he can kiss him, and Reggie splutters and is confused, and Willie says he misses him, and Ray won't host any revelries and he wants to kiss him and Alex said he had to ask first.

-And Reggie looks at Luke and Julie and he looks conflicted and for a moment Willie is scared that Reggie doesn't actually miss them at all, he just wants Luke and Julie, and he's ready to teleport away and hide when Reggie says yes.

-The kiss is sweet and tastes vaguely of pizza. They have a very long talk and Reggie admits he'd missed them too but didn't want to intrude. He'd come to them last, he understood if Willie chose Alex, and Luke and Julie were clearly meant to be.

-Willie cuts him off and pulls him close and is like: you're ours and we're yours.

-Luke is looking very, very conflicted, and Julie looks like she's trying to understand, like when Willie tried to teach her a fae dance. He knows he should not anger their hosts, that's like the first thing he learned, but he can't help it and pouts over Reggie's shoulder: "Julie, you need to share."

-And Julie paused, and then nods. "Okay."

-And Luke is shocked, and Reggie and Alex seem shocked, but Willie is just pleased, and he leans over so he can kiss Luke as well, and finally the tight, sour feeling in his chest goes away and all is well.

-And if a few weeks later, Julie comes into the studio holding Reggie's hand and declaring Willie has to share, Willie is fine with that.