#and it WASNT EVEN REAL JACK.

[samuraijackenjoyer]

dude I was looking through clips for a reference image and it literally makes me sick with anger that Genndy chose to portray Africa like That. Literally racist caricatures like come onnnn man. The worst part is that I really want to LIKE that episode aside from the art direction. His mentor is a very sweet guy and I like Jack’s little rivalry with the other kid. I dislike that Jack has to save everyone and the other tribe is portrayed even worse, but at least Jack isn’t fighting by his fucking self the whole scene. there was so much potential in this episode if Genndy hadn’t been so fucking racist with his character designs. I do not fucking understand why he chose to make them absolutely pitch black in color. That’s not what humans look like. It’s like how he colors Jack straight up yellow sometimes. I know during the time this came out it was not very likely for bigotry to get called out but that had to have made some people uncomfortable. Jeeeeesus Christ. The guy portrayed China more respectfully than he portrayed literally any other culture including Japan lmao. Actually I take that back he gave quite a few Chinese characters racist accents. The man wanted a ‘multiethnic’ feel to his show but could not fucking stop being white and racist for it

[eebie]

we are deconstructing gender on Google docs tonight boys

[chryzuree]

imagine being aurora and waking up a thousand+ years later. your twin brother is now the older twin (by 1000+ years) and also a feared assassin/spy/vampire. your comphet crush has gotten lamer and you super cant justify the way you felt abt him. your actual crush (that you poisoned because you didn’t know how to handle loving her) gets cuteness aggression when she sees you because now she’s also 1000+ years older than you and she wants to protect you. i’d cry.

[killjoy-prince]

them announcing games 4-6 as an a/po/llo j/us/tice trilogy is so funny like i get why they marketed it like that but only 1 1/2 games are about him and the one where 1/2 the games about him only focuses on him in the second and last case

[pjackk]

Yep another miesrable "F my life" moment just hapened to me i basicaly walked 10 miles up the mountain to get to behind to the gas station to see my plug to buy me my with my favorite delta 8 pipe rocks and grab another 6er of tall boy steelies and i forgot i had my lit pre roll from brunch at the Country Grocerys buffet and i tripped on a congom on they away out and fell directly into a puddle of oil which normaly is fine when i fall and hurt myself ebcause nobody gives a fuck about me but the pants got stained wich is not unusual for me either but this time with motor guel or some shit but my pre roll was smoldering still and it set my ptants on fire so i dive in to the muddy ditch to put wet mut on my body to estinguish the fire and it and it shook the fuck up out of my steelos and the bursted all over me and it put out the fire but now i dont have any booze at all and my delta 7 "Fuck n chill" rocks burned tf up and i dont got nothgin left and my pants were all fucked up so i had to go home thru the woods wihtout them and it was so dark out and my peice of shit phone died even thouhg it was at 27% and i couldnt see shit and i was lost for along time so i decide to go to sleep in the woods to find my way back in day time + the animals sounds were high key scary as fuck so i cover myself in leafs and dirt and sticks and mud and other shit to hide from them and i woke up in the adfternoon still tired as fuck cuz i dont sleep good without some shit to put me asleep like my medicidne prescribed from Dr Maltlikker if U catch my drift lol or Dr thc Gummy lol if u get what im saying and these stupid little cunts with 22 rifles were plinking at me and tlaking about how they wanted to shoot my big ugly rusty head right in the head or to shoot a hole in my nippels so i got up and trioed to get them to stop i begged but htey just kept lauhging at me and shooting at me and it realy hurt my feelings so i pick one up and threw it into the sky then they all ran away screaming which is a classic "Dont fuck with honest joe,because he might try to hurt you or kill you if u piss him of moment" but the miracle of the story if that i went to walk 20 feet to findm y way out and i found my busted as shit old as fuck camry with a litle gas left ive been looking for it for a few days cuz i did a lil cruising when i was blackout and did lots of crazy shit i didnt remember at all but it was all on my story and 100 ppl were snaping and whatsapping me telling me to kill myself when i checked my huwawai thats how u know u had a crazy fcking night when u get that shit!!😂😂 but it had a litle gas left and it wasnt super busted so i was able do get back on I81 and soem stupid fcking crazy ass north carolina motha fuckas are driving insanly as fuck as usual and they keep almost hiting me while im just trying to read my fukcking phone to get rid of all these stupid messages and shit i still dont know how to use the app and its hard to type shit with my hands but eventualy i got back to my fuck buddys houe im crashing there even though he hates me now but i have nowehre left since ive been down on my luck and im realy not able to pay the bills no more with my online black jack/DarkRp trial moderator gigs and basicaly he owes me cuaz i got him 1 pack of menthols back when he was 19 and Sleepy Joe Brnadon banned them since "Freedom to do real shit" was aparently removed from the costitution when he was elected😂 but anywas now im sitting here bored as fuck with nothign at all do do cuz i got nothing to get fucked up wthi and i spent the rest of my meony on shit thats burned and blasted im realy worried i wont be able to sleep tongith since i cant get fucked up and thats when the demons starts to flow in my head i might do something realy bad to myself like pluck out my screws or some shit if u care abotu my which u probably dont my cashuapp is $pjack9 im desprate for another bottle to numb my p[ain away

Pic of my ride when i found it thankuly it still had gas😋

[thewertsearch]

I love that Sprites just have this power natively. My headcanon is that when they use it, the words physically appear in the air above them.

JADESPRITE: what did you choose? DAVESPRITE: i guess i made an unwitting choice DAVESPRITE: by deciding to flee

When John was learning about The Choice in LOWAS, I wondered what it would mean to make a real choice in the deterministic world of Paradox Space, and speculated that a Denizen’s Choice might allow you to violate this determinism. After all, if the future really is set in stone, then none of your choices actually matter, even when they're underlined.

If that's true, then perhaps Hephaestus could have helped Future Dave repair his timeline - but instead, he fled, and the Horrorterrors helped him replace it.

JADESPRITE: what happened when you saw him this time? DAVESPRITE: like i said he was awake again DAVESPRITE: but this time i wasnt in any condition to fight DAVESPRITE: so i didnt DAVESPRITE: and thats what i didnt get DAVESPRITE: hes this terrible angry monstrous guy but theres no need to fight him

It sounds like it’s always possible to conquer your Denizen without resorting to combat. This flies in the face of what John's Consorts told him, as they insisted that Typheus must be slain.

There is a little wiggle room there, I guess. It's certainly possible to slay a monster without actually fighting it - for example, by mounting some sort of surprise attack, and catching it unawares. I doubt that's what Davesprite actually means, though.

Besides, an argument could be made that you can't catch a Denizen unawares. It sure didn't work for John.

DAVESPRITE: so he looked me up and down all hard DAVESPRITE: saw the broken sword DAVESPRITE: and like before gave me the choice […] JADESPRITE: so it was the same choice? DAVESPRITE: no

DAVESPRITE: it was different DAVESPRITE: i think it must be always different DAVESPRITE: depending on the circumstances DAVESPRITE: i dont know what the choice is when you face him the way youre supposed to

Or if it’s even necessary. It sounds like the trolls completely ignored the Choice mechanic, but they were still able to win their game...

...for a given value of 'winning', I suppose.

Maybe you do need to make some Choices to win your game, then. Hephaestus seems to have been trying to help Future Dave, so maybe some of the trolls could have used their Choices to neutralize the threat of Perfect Jack before it was able to manifest.

[jackles010378]

A Christmas wish

Weeks after the death of Dean in that barn, y/n was nearing her first Christmas without her boyfriend, as she sat under the stars and saw a shooting star she prayed to Jack for one last day with Dean as she didn't get the chance to say a proper goodbye, but knowing Jack was hands off she didn't hold her breath. As she woke up on christmas morning a surprise was waiting for her in the bunker library...........

No warnings needed, a bit sad but I really needed to write this so I hope you like it 🥹💚 little nervous about posting this, not gonna lie 🫣

Y/n's heart felt heavier with each passing day as Christmas approached. Days had turned into weeks since Dean's tragic death in the barn. The painful memories haunted her every waking moment, and the thought of celebrating Christmas without him was unbearable.

On Christmas Eve, y/n decided to spend the night under the stars with Miracle by her side, seeking solace in their twinkling beauty.

As she gazed up at the sky, a shooting star streaked across the darkness. In that moment, a surge of emotion welled up inside her, and she whispered a silent prayer to Jack, the all-powerful entity she had encountered on her adventures with Dean.

She prayed for just one more day with Dean, a chance to say a proper goodbye and find closure in their tumultuous journey. But y/n knew deep down that Jack was a hands-off observer, and the chances of her prayer being answered were slim.

The cold night air seemed to echo her silent pleas as she ad Miracle finally retreated inside the bunker, bracing herself for the emptiness of Christmas morning. When she woke up, something was different. Miracle seemed to sense the change too and ran off before y/n could stop him.

Y/n made her way to the bunker's library, her heart heavy with grief and longing. As she entered the room, a gasp escaped her lips. There, standing in the dim light of the Christmas tree, was Dean. He crouched down ruffling Miracles fur, he was excited to see him.

Tears blurred y/n's vision as she rushed forward, unsure if she was dreaming or if this was some cruel twist of fate. But as Dean turned to her with a smile that reached his eyes, she knew this was real. "how, I mean, are you really here?" y/n asked him, looking him up and down in disbelief". Dean reached out to her, his fingers brushing against her arm. She flinched at his touch, her eyes going wide as she realised he was really standing in front of her.

Dean pulled her in for a hug. His hand gently landing on the back of her head as she sobbed quietly against his chest. He cleared his throat as he began to talk to her. "it seems that your little wish you made, Jack heard." y/n's head snapped up and found those glistening green orbs staring back at her. "I thought............ I didn't think he........... I can't believe your here" she struggled to get the words to describe how she was dealing with this. Dean held her a little tighter as they embraced each other still standing by the tree.

For a moment time seemed to stand still. They were holding onto each other as if they would never let go. Dean's presence was warm and solid, his familiar scent filling the room and easing the ache in y/n's heart. Dean walked them over to the couch, holding her close to him. He wasn't going to waste a single second of his time with her. He knew he had to explain this was a one time deal, but for now he would just take in the moment and cuddle with his girl.

As they sat together by the twinkling lights of the Christmas tree, Dean recounted his journey after his death, the battles he had fought, and the sacrifices he had made. He spoke of his love for y/n, a love that transcended time and space, a love that had brought him back to her side on this special day. With Jack's help of course. Dean then told her that this wasn't permanent, but he would always be watching over her. Nothing really stays dead in the world of supernatural, even if he wasnt coming back for good this time, he would always look out for her.

And as they exchanged words of love and forgiveness, y/n realized that this unexpected gift was more than just a Christmas miracle. It was a chance to say goodbye, to find closure, and to cherish the memories they had shared. As the day turned to evening, y/n and Dean spent one last night together. They made love to each other, Dean not rushing a single moment of it. He wanted to make sure she knew how much he loved her, that she would always be his soul mate.

As the first light of dawn broke, Dean woke up with y/n still in his arms. He pushed the hair away from her face and placed a sweet kiss on her cheek. She stirred as he was standing at the edge of the bed looking down at her. Tears formed in her eyes as she knew this was her final goodbye. She knelt in front of him and kissed him one last time. As she pulled away their foreheads touching, Dean's form began to fade. His final words echoed in y/n's heart. "I'll always be with you," he whispered, his voice filled with love and warmth.

And as y/n watched him disappear into the light, she knew that Dean Winchester would forever be a part of her, guiding her through the darkness and lighting up her world with his love. And on that Christmas morning, y/n found peace in the knowledge that love never truly dies, it simply transforms into something eternal and divine.

TAGLIST : @nescavaneckdaily @k-slla @cevansbaby-dove @kaleldobrev @janineb86 @deans-daydream @alternativeprincess94 @angelbabyyy99 @cheynovak @winchesterwild78 @suckitands33

Let me know what you think, I hope you guys liked it 🥰 💚

[leikeliscomet]

Im just gonna say it: the exact same argument about series 11 having a woman playing the Doctor but w/ inconsistent politic & fake activism applies to series 14 & a lil of RTD2 in general but in Black. Respectability politics & flimsy anti racism all over the shop

It thinks futuristic racism corrects racism "being a thing of the past" but then actively erases said racism of Britain's past. Twice. Not only that but it glorifies the 60s & regency period. Does "powerful" white supremacy commentary then slaps a regency wig on 15's head 😭

It should go without saying that 1960s & 1800s Britain wasnt some post racial utopia. The show would rather make these periods more progressive than they really were instead of telling the stories of the POC living there or hell, show us history outside of 'the West'

It treats the dehumanisation of Black people as an inevitable part of future society. Fifteen has to be a perfect non violent victim of racism but can fridge the goblin king & the chuldur easy. Racism can/must exist but fighting back or having any reaction to ur oppressor can't.

The gag is RTD understands racial oppression when it affects *him* tho. The oppression of the Welsh is acknowledged in present day Earth bc it's a real part of history. Its addressed again in 2046 bc it's still relevent in the future. & did Ruby save Roger? No she got him gone!

It sanitises its own history. The Doctor has called out racial supremacy, human or not since day. And no they didn't always save *everyone*. Against the establishment to begging it & partying with it too apparently. Rosa has issues but at least it was hopeful...

It treats Fifteen as a white character made Black which has weird implications for a non human being from a "post racial" society. Thirteen wasn't a "human woman" but she still had the agency to call out every misogynist she met. Lawd forbid she cried over Jack Robertson 😭

Despite having a Black Doctor they're written for a white audience. 'It's not about Black people, its about white people' sealed the deal. It treats their Blackness as circumstantial & not something they'll have to deal with regardless of time period playing it safe & palatable

This 1 should be self explanatory. If Donna's seen the Doctor's mind then she knows Fugitive Doctor exists so yes the Doctor comes in a range of different colours 🤪🤪 And again if he's not a human Black man but an alien then why is it a surprise that he can change race? Ugh...

Isaac Newton wasn't that deep bc he's only there for the mavity gag but it opened a fuck ton of racism towards Nathaniel Curtis & antiblackness bc the racists camping the tag thought he was Black. 'Owning the right 🤪' at the expense of POC in the show & fandom. Great job there..

RTD made the point of the Toymaker being racist then keeps him anyway? Takes a jab about cultural appropriation in Pyramids of Mars then based the finale on it anyway w/ Sutekh? Not even entertaining the Black Guardian ting. Like what's the point of any of this? It feels so fake.

Carla's not as egregious as the previous but apart from RTD copying & posting her name from Clyde's mum in SJA, she doesn't get a lot to do outside supporting Ruby's storyline. S14 then ends with Ruby calling her bio mum her "real" mum so her serving role didn't mean much anyway

The Giggle was the 1st flag bc it conflated all political related anger as bad bc it's anger instead of love 😫✊🏻without *single* look at why the current political climate is the way that it is. Pandemic, genocides, climate change & govt corruption yh ppl will be angry Russell 🥴

Series 11 at least gets to gas itself up for having women write for the 1st female Doctor and having Black and South Asian writers for the first time in the show's history (which isn't a great achievement but ah well)

Series 14 doesn't have that to its credit.

Black woman who only exists to boost white characters stories, racism stories that don't give their Black characters full agency & 0 follow up of their experiences only this time w/ no Black writers. Same tings different font. What improvement was made exactly?

Tl;Dr - We have the 1st Black Doctor in the main lineup but this series handles race and racism poorly. There's barely any improvement from how race was handled in RTD1 and his handling of Black characters in Years & Years and It's a Sin hasn't been brought over. 🥴

[aliaology]

NOW THAT WE DONT TALK

summary: erm.. idk for this one but pt. 8!

warnings: erm none…

series masterlist

user

liked by user, user and 287,826 others

user upcoming singer, y/n marner found crying hotel pool after a party her close friend had the night before.

📸 : user

comments

user yall dk how to leave my girl ALONE

user FR dick riders ong!!

user why is this such a big deal like are girls not allowed to cry

user bet u its bc of trevor or jack lol

user also sabrina carpenter was the one with her after the party too!!

user wtf is this lol

user 🔥🔥

user can we glaze someone else for once

user y was girl crying at a POOL 💀

user she prolly needed fresh air dawg

user this is WILD

user hope jack sees this xx

ynusername hi yes this is in fact me crying lol!! i just had an extreme hangover and was very overwhelmed xx thats all!

user poor baby :((

user lmfao who asked

user k and

user feel better babes

ynusername

liked by marner_93, austonmatthews and others

ynusername this is not me condoning alcohol, but this is me condoning a much needed drink!

comments

marner_93 im kicking your ass when you get home

ynusername and that wont be for awhile xx 🥳

user shes so real for this 💀😭

user is jack daniels even good

ynusername only the burn

colecaulfied fav marn

ynusername always

user 4+4?

user lowkey serving

user shes so hot wtf

austonmatthews now this is where lil marn went

ynusername save me

sabrinacarpenter okay cutie 🤍🤩

ynusername all u baby 🤍

user holy fuck

user shes so 🤗🤗🤗

user whore

user AND DID 😻😻😻

user wasnt she like just found crying

user yeah LMFAO

user pretty girl

edwards.73 are u coming back to umich soon..

ynusername yes pookie

edwards.73 finally 😒

ynusername dont give me that attitude

gracieabrams 🤩🤩

im making a book on wattpad woot woot!!

tags: @slaythehousebootsdown13 , @lxnceclercs , @honethatty12 , @outrunangelss , @absolutelyhugh3s , @hockeyboysarehot , @lovinbarzal , @shadowsndaisies , @um-mads , @bqbylon , @whoreforthehughesbrothers , @Robloxlover2007 , @p3nislawd , @alexx-stancati , @queenmendes , @-eedwardss , @if-my-heart-bleeds , @love-like-woaah , @freds-slut

[the-s1lly-corner]

hi i uh saw the jeff x reader who eats flesh.. can you maybe do one for toby too?

ticci toby x reader who eats flesh

fellas imma be so real i was scared to post the flesh eating reader because thats outside of what i normally post but its so in tune with themes in the creepypasta fandom- i mean eyeless jack is right there.. so im relieved to see that its not being shot down

notes: reader is gn, reader is not specified to be human they can be viewed as whatever- human, monster, cursed, ect

cws: flesh eating, toby literally offering a piece of him out of genuine curiosity

he thinks its a little... gross.. but hes not going to beat you down for it- for the most part he steps into a different room when youre eating your meals

if you are limited to only eating human meat because thats.. physically... all your body can accept... hes more understanding.. not very happy about it but at least you have the argument that its either this or dying

and lord knows he doesnt want you to die

he does take advantage of the fact that you can help dispose of bodies on nights where he catches one, tries not to make you feel like you need to help him get rid of it though

similar to the jeff post he does jokingly ask you what you think he tastes like, but hes less inclined to back track if you pretend youre about to take a bite of him

not in a sexual way, just a "hey im kind of curious, and im going to use the fact i cant feel it as an excuse to let you take a chunk" sort of way

is it reckless, and do you wish he wasnt so reckless with his body? yes, and i would assume you dont want him just tossing himself into danger... but thats an entirely different subject for a different post

bonus points if you're not human and the taste of flesh varies from person to person depending on what they were like and stuff- he will be disappointed if he tastes bland or average if you follow through with taking a nibble

i mean dont, even if hes open to it, but

you know

[weirdmageddon]

yesterday i wrote a scene where jade wasnt a plot device and was left the hell alone in A6A5 because this being dave and jade’s last proper conversation in years made me sad and i wanted to see them reunite properly. i mixed a bit of narration in too even though it was rare around this point in the comic but its just to paint a better picture. also i wouldnt mind feedback on character voice (it’s important to me that the dialogue sounds believable)

[3 years are over, everyone is in the new session. The prospit ship is on LOMAX, as is everyone who arrived on the meteor, safely warped by Jade onto LOMAX as well. Jade has banished B2 Jack to the Furthest Ring already. She hasn't seen her friends in 3 years, not to mention she never met the trolls in person yet.]

[Jade teleports to LOMAX where John was talking with the meteor crew. Her eyes widen when she sees the trolls, giving everyone a greeting. Jade waves to the trolls.]

You’ll have time to catch up with them later. First you want to reconvene with Rose and Dave.

> ==>

Dave... Oh my god! DAVE!!! That’s right! The last time you saw him, he died in your arms after Jack redirected the bullets from your gun into his body!

JADE: dave!!!! DAVE: hey DAVE: this has been three years coming hasnt it DAVE: cmere

> ==>

[Dave hugs Jade with a slight grin on face. He notices her… sniffing him?? but doesn’t even bother to question it.]

JADE: it is so nice to hold your body when its not a corpse :) DAVE: ok DAVE: weird thing to say DAVE: actually who am i kidding who gives a shit DAVE: i almost forgot how much i missed the enigmatic riddlefuckery that is your phrasing DAVE: fortunately i have context for this so i know what youre saying DAVE: humor me for a sec and imagine that i didnt DAVE: but first DAVE: are those dog ears JADE: yes! i am part dog now JADE: because i prototyped my dreamself with becsprite JADE: jadesprite became part of me! and so did her doggy traits from bec DAVE: got it DAVE: oh yeah john mentioned that on the back of his dumb poster inside that bucket that appeared out of thin air DAVE: right before we had to haul ass out of there before jack caught up to us DAVE: karkat had a complete fucking meltdown over that btw i wish you couldve seen it DAVE: damn it feels like so long ago now JADE: heheheh i remember JADE: john realized it at the last second but it was too late! DAVE: of course it was johns idea only he could do something that gooberish DAVE: you know what this means though JADE: yup!! woof woof DAVE: it means youve done it harley DAVE: youve finally done it god damn it DAVE: the evolution of humankind is finally upon us DAVE: the scientists said it would never happen in our lifetime DAVE: but look what we have here DAVE: before me stands mans first legitimate furry subspecies DAVE: homo canis DAVE: as the name implies theyre gay as fuck btw DAVE: its too bad all those scientists are dead and cant witness this phylogenetic breakthrough DAVE: rip to the science community yall wouldve lost your collective shit DAVE: hey jade lets pour one out for the science community for being real ones

> ==>

You are still nestled into Dave’s shoulder. He’s taken a sort of protective position over you. Your perceptive barkbeast ears can hear his formerly bullet-riddled heart beating a mile a minute with the regularity of quartz beneath his time-branded pajamas, all the while he continues to ramble to you about certifiably dumb shit. You can tell Dave is psyched to see you again, even if he expresses it in his OWN bizarre way, which means extended metaphors and topical tangents. What a hypocrite, calling YOUR phrasing perplexing! You sure missed this guy.

You realize you started tuning him out while thinking about all this.

DAVE: jade JADE: umm homo is the species name JADE: so wouldnt that mean were all gay? :p DAVE: yeah that sounds about right DAVE: anyway enough of this bullshit

> ==>

[Dave motions to retract his arms since he doesn’t want it to get too weird, but Jade squeezes tighter. Dave immediately yields to the movement]

DAVE: jesus wow ok DAVE: really happy to see you too DAVE: like if you had a tail it would be wagging so forcefully youd be knocking over all the fucking furnishings in the room DAVE: just slapping it so hard on the owners thigh that it feels like theyre being flogged DAVE: talk about getting bitch slapped JADE: :D DAVE: so howve you been JADE: really really excited to see you guys all again!!! JADE: and to meet the trolls! DAVE: yeah theyre pretty weird DAVE: and im still not used to it DAVE: but it gets more manageable the longer youre around them DAVE: by the way JADE: ?

> ==>

DAVE: sorry you had to go through that JADE: through what? DAVE: seeing me die and stuff again DAVE: except that time right in front of you JADE: .... DAVE: when we were gathering up all those frogs i knew jack was going to appear DAVE: i was waiting and waiting to play it out DAVE: mentally rehearsing my fucking torso getting turned into swiss cheese and knowing you would have to watch on top of it DAVE: i had to make sure it happened to protect the integrity of the alpha timeline DAVE: but if you knew this was going to happen you wouldve tried to prevent it and created a doomed one DAVE: and so i didnt say anything DAVE: i couldnt DAVE: so DAVE: sorry for putting you through that JADE: oh..... JADE: dave D: JADE: well im here JADE: if you ever want to talk about it DAVE: its cool DAVE: you just deserve to know what happened there DAVE: but thanks DAVE: so am i JADE: yeah i know JADE: i guess i should be glad you did that then... JADE: even though i was freaking out when it happened ._. JADE: otherwise you wouldnt be here will us now dressed in your red god tier time pajamas DAVE: yeah these magical rags really are comfortable arent they DAVE: and they stay like perma clean JADE: they are! i would wear mine over and over for days on end JADE: id take a nice shower and put it right back on JADE: and you know how much i love cycling my outfits through my wardrobifier JADE: by the way dave your cape is sooo cool! :o DAVE: thanks DAVE: yeah i love it its hella soft DAVE: its like ive got a portable snuggle blanket with me in case i ever need to drop to the floor like a tired sack of shit and get my snooze on DAVE: ive got a permanent personal reservation at club bed featuring dj pillow and mc blanky JADE: heheheh JADE: can i touch your cape? DAVE: of course go nuts JADE: yaaaay!!

[2braincellslz]

Hey!

Can i request Thomas Shelby x son! Reader, where the reader is the bastard child of him and no one knows about him except Tommy. The reader's mother dies and he gets sent to a distant relative who mistreat him. And the reader also knows who his real father is, and one day they meet and the reade is just really really sarcastic and Tommy somehow finds out that this disrespectful child is his kid he abandoned.

Father Dearest

Relationship: Son!reader and Father!Thomas

Desc: (y/n) having to suffer with his Aunt and Uncle, he decided to spend his day at the Garrison only to run in to his long lost father.

(Y/n) tossed again, huffing in displeasure. The sun was rising now but it wasnt like he got much sleep. Back at his moms estate, that was definitely not given to her to keep her quiet, he slept in one of the softest beds imaginable. It was almost like sleeping on a cloud. Now, living with Aunt Ann and Uncle Dick, he slept on a potato sack. Sometimes he swore he felt needles poking him from inside the mattress.

(Y/n) tossed more more time for good measure before giving up. He rolled off of his piss poor mattress, if it could even be called that, and tugged on his slightly too small "street" clothes. That of witch was a old yellowed dress shirt, work pants, and a hat. His "caregivers" didnt get him anything else.

Now, Aunt Ann and Uncle Dick wernt poor. Far from it. They were just cheap. Cheap when it came to (y/n). Cheap to the point where (y/n) was forced to sleep in the attic rather the guest room.

Ann and Dick had their own kids. Viv, a younger girl, she was kind but then again the reality of the world hadn't hit her yet. And Shawn, a boy about the same age as (y/n). Shawn and (y/n) got along fairly well. Often, they would hang out under some bridge and gamble with eachother. Whether it be a quick game of black jack or some kind of contest.

Shawn was also the only person who know about the hush money (y/n) received weekly. Shawn knew why (y/n) was getting hush money. Shawn knew who the hush money was coming from. Shawn also knew that (y/n) would lie about going off to work, much preferring hanging out at one bar or another and people watching but it was only a matter of time before people watching got boring.

(Y/n) climbed up the stairs, in to the kitchen where Aunt Ann and Uncle Dick were already sat at the table. The maid, Lizabeth, was hard away working at the stove while Viv watched carefully. Shawn was stood by a mirror, checking his tie one last time.

"Hot date?" (Y/n) asked, lightly slapping the back of Shawn's head.

"God, I wish."

"(Y/n)!" Dick called from the kitchen "dont hit Shawn or you'll be out on the streets so fast your head will spin!"

Shawn and (y/n) couldn't help but give a look, trying not to burst out in to a fit of laughter.

Letting in to the living room, (y/n) took the couch that was practically calling for him to fall asleep in and Shawn took a arm chair.

"So what's with the get-up?" (Y/n) asked, pouring himself a glass of Morning liquor.

"Dad's wanting to introduce me to some of his clients. Saying that I better get used to the 'get-up'"

(Y/n) hummed, nodding. He took a sip of the wisky. Dick would kill him if he caught (y/n) dirking it.

"So , what's your plan?" Shawn asked, getting himself a Morning glass.

"Planning on swinging by the Garrison. Seeing if that bar maid position is still open."

Shawn made a face, one of confusion and studder worry. "The Garrison? The place you are payed not to go to?"

(Y/n) just smiled, tipping his glass to Shawn.

"You are utterly crazy. Mr. Shelby still visits!" Shawn whisper yelled, leaning forward.

"He hasnt seen me in, what, eighteen years? He won't recognize me." (Y/n) couldnt help the small smile that crept up on to his face at the sight of the great Thomas Shelby being tripped up over his long lost son. "He's too busy with his businesses to even notice me."

"And if he does?" Shawn rasied his eyebrows.

"They I say I have a right to be here. The money is so I dont, one, stake any claim on anything to do with the Shelby family, two, not tell anyone that my dad is The Great Tommy Shelby, and three, not bug Thomas. I can still go to the Garrison."

"You're insane." Shawn sat back, placing his glass on the side table.

"Shawn, my boy, are you ready?" (Y/n) shot back the rest of the drink as Dick turned the corner.

"Yes, sir." Shawn stood up, straightening his cuffs.

Dick started for the door. Just as Shawn was about the leave, he shot (Y/n) a warning look. 'Dont get yourself in to unwarranted trouble.'

"(Y/n)." Aunt Ann called. "We have... guests tonight. I would suggest you etheir stay out late or stay in your room. Make yourself scarce."

(Y/n) just rolled his eyes, grabbing his cap before heading out the door.

The walk to the Garrison was never boring. The roaring flames from the factory's and the smoke filling passer by lungs was always a grand way to wake up. Granted, it was the only way to wake up.

Pushing open the door to the Garrison, (y/n) made himself at home in one of the bar seats.

"Ah, (y/n)" the bartender who (y/n) never bothered to learn the name of smiled. "The usual?"

"Actually, I was wondering if the bar maid position was still available?" (Y/n) asked, lighting up a cigarette.

Just as the bartender was about to open his mouth, the door snapped open. While the bartender was quick to look up (y/n) took his time.

A taller man walked in (clearly already buzzed). He was dressed in a distressed and messy suit and had a bushy mustache. (Y/n) was no stranger to the man, having shared one or two drinks with him.

Another guy was right behind him, a lot yonger. (Y/n) could tag him as Finn, the youngest of the (now) three Shelby sons.

The kingpin wasnt far behind his two brothers.

"Alright, everybody out." Arthur shouted causing the one or two people who didnt have jobs to leave. Exept (y/n) who sat back against the bar.

Arthur glanced over, clearly trying too hard to be intimidating. "Oi, you deaf?"

"Nope. Just bored." (Y/n) took a long drag of his cigarette.

"You got a death wish?" Finn piped up. God, It was hard not to laugh. Finn was almost like a little dog barking with the rest of the german shepherds as if he was one in the same.

"Depends on the day. Today..." (y/n) paused, pretending to think it over. "Nah."

"You best be leaving then." Arther took over again.

"No." (Y/n) turned around, back to the Shelbys.

"Leave him be. He won't say anything." Thomas finally hushed his brothers. Almost as if trained dogs, they both shut up and sat down. "What's your name?"

"(Y/n)." He didn't turn back around. "(Y/n) (l/n)"

(Y/n) though he was poking a bear with a stick, wasnt dumb. He knew not to out right say he was a Shelby so he used his long lost mothers name.

(Y/n) could hear the cogs turning In Thomas's head. He could feel his father's eyes burrowing in to the back of his head.

Arthur stared on about something or a another.

(Y/n) finished his cigarette just as the brothers were finishing up their little chat.

The stood next to (y/n) creaked slightly as one of the brothers sat down next to him. The bartender slid him a drink. There was a thud, money being placed on the counter, only Tommy did that.

"Do I know you?" Straight to the point.

"No. I dont think you do."

"Your last name sounds familiar." Tommy took a sip of his drink, watching his brothers leave the bar. "You're brave but dumb."

"Two of my best quality's." (Y/n) waved down the bartender whi handed in another drink. (Y/n) reached over and took the money Thomas was going to use to "pay" for his drinks, sliding it infront of himself.

"Do you have a job? Seems like a odd time for someone of your age to be hangin around bars."

"Nope, just got fired."

"Yet you dont have a death wish."

"Hated the fucking job." (Y/n) paused. He knew Thomas could see right through him. (Y/n) did know if it was a dad things

or a Thomas thing. "Boss's were scum. Good coworkers though."

"Isnt that always the case..." Tommy sipped his drink.

"You know." (Y/n) threw back the rest of his drink. "I always thought 'Tommy' was a odd name for a gang leader. You would expect something more... hard. 'Tommy' is a name you would expect a young sweet kid."

"And Thomas?"

"Thomas is a little better."

"A little?" Thomas looked over, not being able to hide the suddle smile.

"Mhm. (Y/n) is a much better." (Y/n) smiled back.

Thomas hummed, moving off of the seat. "Well, (y/n), next time you want to talk to your father you dont have to your uncles." Thomas said, leaving the bar.

(Y/n) jumped, nearly out of his skin. He quickly turned, nearly knocking himself out of this chair.

"What the fuck."

[jackmanbj]

not just yours

summary: you and jack have been seeing each other for a while now and hes trying everything in his power to get you to break up with him.

you hade just stepped into jacks home and he was already giving you jewelry and purses.

“jack baby, sam is going to be asking where i got all this stuff from.”

“from your main man duh.”

“jack be serious.”

“i dont know, just say your best friend got you these as a surprise because we haven’t seen each other in a long time.”

“whatever.”

jack reached over to get a necklace around you.

“jack how much was this?”

“eh it wasn’t that bad.”

“j how much?” “it was only 5k, it wasnt bad babe calm down.”

“fine.”

jack pulled out his phone for you to see your face on his wallpaper.

“baby i got you a gift!”

“what is it stink?”

jack blind folded you and brought you outside, he took the blindfold off and you seen a pink rolls-royce.

“JACKMAN OH MY GOD!!”

jack leaned over and kissed you cheek.

“do you like it sweet girl?”

“you did not oh my god!”

you wan to the hood of the car where the keys were and unlocked it.

jack took his phone and took pictures of you next to your car.

“jack baby, i love this car so much but, i have a boyfriend. how am i just going to pop up back home with a whole fucking expensive ass car?”

“mamas break up with him!”

“what no!”

“and why not?”

“jack i.. im scared, i hate letting people down and then what if i feel guilty and just get back with him?”

jack went over to you picked you up and went over to the passenger side and placed you into the car as he went over to the driver side.

“where are we going?”

“to your house to go get your stuff, just break up with him please.”

“jackman if i tell you no one more time your using your hand for a fucking month.”

“baby, you cant live without some dick be so for real.”

“jack baby i have a boyfriend who can give me dick?”

“don’t mention him while we’re together unless your telling me your breaking up with him.”

jack put the car in drive and started making his way to mcdonald’s.

the car ride was silent, you were on your phone texting sam while jack was obviously starting to get upset.

“why cant you just leave him though? it’s a serious question, he doesn’t treat you good, and you obviously aren’t satisfied with him.”

“you just told me not to mention him and not even two minutes lat you are, jackman i want to be with only you i do but give me some time and ill break up with him, you trying yo force me is just going to make me stay with him longer. calm down and give me time jack.”

jack huffed and pulled into the mcdonald’s driveway and ordered himself a ice scream sunday.

“what do you want baby?” “vanilla milkshake and medium fries.”

jack told the lady your order and started pulling up the the first window.

jack took his card out and handed to her.

you noticed when the girl grabbed his card she made it her top priority to slightly grab jacks hand before she giggled and closed the window.

“uhm..”

“what?” “did she just like..grab your hand for real like deadass in front of me.”

before jack got a chance to answer you the lady opened the window back up and handed jack the card and a piece of paper.

jack looked at the paper and it read ‘***-***-****’ -amari.

you took the paper from jack and read it yourself before you could even have the slightest chance to react or get pissed of jack went up to the next window.

you balled up the paper and put it in your back pocket to throw away later.

jack handed you your fries and milkshake as he started driving back to his house.

“mamas.”

“yes baby?”

“can i have some of your milkshake?”

“no we literally just left, you could have gotten some when we were there.”

jack reached over your lap and grabbed your milkshake and taking a long sip.

you looked at him in disbelief as he laughed and handed you your milkshake.

“i fucking hate you.”

you took another sip of your milkshake as jack pulled up to a gas station.

you wanted to get some snacks so you went in the store for jack and left your phone.

after a little while of you, being in the store a incoming call came in from ‘sammy🫀’

jack knew you were going to kill him for this but he answered the phone.

“hey baby, when are you coming back home?”

“i dont know man she might not be home for a few days.”

“say who the fuck are you??”

“her main man duh.”

sam started cursing jack out when he seen you walking out the store.

he quickly hung up and placed your phone right back where it was.

you got into the car and noticed your phone ringing, you picked it up and put your hand up to jack telling him to be quiet.

“WHO THE FUCK WAS THAT DUDE THAT ANSWERED THE PHONE FOR YOU??”

jack got out of the car and started making his way to the gas pump after turning off the car.

“what dude sam? im by myself right now..?”

“nahh fuck all that, i called you and some dude answered talkin’ ‘bout you might not b home for a few days. but its good though go live with him ima pack all yo shit, im not going anywhere o break nothing im just going to pack it up so you can pick it up tomorrow, i hope he let you live with him.”

sam hung up and honestly you were relieved, i mean you were pissed at jackman of course but you finally got out of the toxic relationship you were just in and were desperate to escape.

jack got back in the car without saying a word and all you did was pull his face in and kiss him.

“you have to come with me to get my stuff tomorrow from my old apartment, rather you like it or not i live with you not and your using for hand till the end of december baby.”

[whole-circus]

Hello!! May I please ask for something along the lines of… Like, several creepypasta characters (like EJ, Toby, etc-) with a gender neutral s/o who usually covers their body head to toe, like, not even leaving a piece of their skin out in the open, maybe mostly due to some deep seeded insecurities,, or they got some bodily deformities,,, or both— But they let their creep see them without all the clothing after maybe like a month or two of being in a relationship???

(You don’t have to do this one of course, I just really like your writing, I also hope you have a nice day/night!!!)

Creepypastas x gn.reader that covers their body!

➥ with Jeff the Killer, Homicidal Liu, "Ticci" Toby, Eyeless Jack, Ben Drowned, Laughing Jack

Hi hello love! Sorry you waited a lot! :(

.•┈••✦ 🖤 ✦••┈•.

☆ Jeff the Killer

Oh? S/O? Is that really you? Jeff is pretty suprised - but he doesnt complain! Im pretty sure he would try to get you uncover yourself earlier because he is stupid and a meanie. But when you done that yourself? He is relieved, he would be scared that you are maybe afraid of him? Maybe he did something wrong..? Like lets be real, he is a serial killer, he wouldnt blame you. Ofc he would never say that out loud. But when he sees your body, he doesn't feel any diffrent about you - no matter what you were hiding. If you were insecure then he would be way nicer to you, showering you in kisses..maybe even more close activities..because he loves you for you.

☆ Homicidal Liu

Doesn't mind that you cover your body a lot, and doesn't really mind when you showed him - dont get me wrong, he loves that you feel comfortable and trust him that much, but he never wanted to push you. Also! Even if he finds you really attractive, then he is is in relationship with your for your amazing personality. But when he sees you? Man, I mean he doesn't complain. You are still the prettiest person he has ever seen! No matter what were you hiding - if it was just some insecurities or deformation! He would place kissess all over your body and complement you even more often (is that even possible??).

☆ 'Ticci' Toby

Curious boy!! There is a high chance that he actually aksed you about it..or! He didnt even noticed, he just..dunno, were with you and didnt thought about it. Why are you always so covered head to toes? Are you a spy? Maybe a magic creature? What are you hiding silly..? If you finally show your body and explain, he will be even more in love! Like you are such a dummy, he loves you anyway - no matter if you actually were hiding something like deformation, or if you were insecure. He would kiss all your bad thoughts away! I totally see Toby saying all this lovey-dovey stuff, he would be your number one supporter!

☆ Eyeless Jack

He noticed the way you always dress in a lot of clothes, no matter the weather..or how you try not too look into mirror whenever you pass them. Jack sense that something is wrong, and that you hiding something. He propably thought that its all becasue of him - are you scared? Disgusted? Maybe you didn't feel safe with him? The situation were killing you both, so he was so relieved when you told him the reason! Jack is a grown ass men, and no matter what were you hiding, he doesnt care. Like come on, he is literally a demon, there is no way you could scare him away! He would be even more clingy to you, caring about your well being and always put you first.

☆ Ben Drowned

Ben can be a huge tease about how you dress, he would make a lot of this sex related jokes, so it wasnt easy to you. No worries, he loves you a lot, you are his bestfriend and partner..but he was wondering what is wrong. At first he thought that its just your style (he doesn't judge, he is a ghost himself!!), but you were always covering your body so he got more suspicious. But when he finally sees your body? When you finally tell him what was wrong? He was glad you cared so much about him, that you were so trusting. He wouldn't make a big deal out of it - like oh, you look pretty..now wanna play with him? Ben made you place already..(this place is definitely his arms tho!)

☆ Laughing Jack

Jack is really touchy, he just clings to you like koala and its hard to make him stop. So its pretty obvious that he noticed how you were a bit distant sometimes, always making excuses and stuff. He was pretty miserable because of that, you are his S\O ..he wants you to feel safe and comfortable around him.. So he start asking a lot of questions, most of them were pretty random, druing normal conversations. But he waited..and it was totally worth it - he immediately hugs you and give you a lot of kisses! He would spend hours and hours praising and worshipping you..no worries, he has all the time in the world!

.•┈••✦ 🖤 ✦••┈•.

[lliminall]

excerpts from the group chat | pannacotta fugo x reader

tags: fem reader, implied sexual activity, copious amounts of swearing, borderline crack but I know in my heart they would be this annoying irl

Fuck Heads

Group Chat with Pannacotta Fugo, Narancia Ghirga & Guido Mista

iMessage

Tuesday 4:34 PM

Guido Mista they didn’t have salsa I got u ketchup

Narancia Ghirga ok fuck u

Guido Mista they’re both tomatoes idk why ur bitching

Narancia Ghirga Im not brining ur beer now ur fucking on ur own

Guido Mista please daddy? 🥺

Narancia Ghirga jk princess I got it

Guido Mista fugo I am headed over now be there in 10

Narancia Ghirga be there in 20 running late

4:47 PM

Guido Mista bro I’m here let me in

Guido Mista are u shitting?? open up I’m here

Narancia Ghirga its cus u brought us fucking ketchup instead of salsa

Narancia Ghirga jusy call him hes probably getting his dick wet again

Guido Mista we talked about this he does not have a girlfriend. he is a fucking incel narancia

Narancia Ghirga i was there last week I heard moaning. I told u

Guido Mista then it was porn u dumb fuck

Guido Mista open the FUCKING door

Narancia Ghirga bro literally what are u doing let us IN

Pannacotta Fugo I will fucking kill both of you

Pannacotta Fugo Stop banging on the fucking door.

Guido Mista LET US INNNNN

Narancia Ghirga wtf let us in???

Pannacotta Fugo I’ll let you in but do not speak to her. She’s studying in my room just mind your business

Guido Mista SHE????

Narancia Ghirga BRO ACTUALLY WAS GETTIN IT WET LMAOOO

Guido Mista and why can’t we meet her??

Pannacotta Fugo You fucking organisms. You are not pestering my girlfriend.

Narancia Ghirga BRO

Guido Mista BROOOO

Guido Mista also ok rude

Narancia Ghirga he cant bring her out cus he wiped her out with his 10 inch schlong

Guido Mista u don’t even have a girlfriend ur just embarrassed we caught u jacking off

Pannacotta Fugo I’m coming outside and I’m bringing a fucking weapon

Narancia Ghirga is that why u had us bring some much food I thought u we’re trying to bulk up wasnt gonn a judge tho

Guido Mista my man 💯💯💯

Guido Mista proud of u now let us the fuck in

Guido Mista the food is getting cold bro open the fucking door

7:28 PM

Guido Mista night bro would have gave u ur goodnight kiss but ur girlfriend was right there

Narancia Ghirga wheres my goodnight kiss

Guido Mista come here bby girl i got it for u right here

Pannacotta Fugo You will be two brown stains on the floor by the time I'm done with you

Narancia Ghirga pee ur pannts

--

iMessage

7:45 PM

Narancia Ghirga fugo got his dick sucked today. by a real girl

Bruno Bucciarati Why are you telling me this

Narancia Ghirga just thougth u might like to know

message read at 7:47 PM

--

iMessage

7:50 PM

Narancia Ghirga abbachio guess who i saw layin pipe tonight

This user has blocked your number. You are unable to call or text this number at this time.

Narancia Ghirga fugo

Narancia Ghirga dammit

[river-of-wine]

i agree with ur post abt the RE villians so much… the way people treat the lords is honestly the way people should have treated the bakers 😭😭 who were like actually not even themselves like they were literally being controlled…

donna especially bothers me with how people treat her as a innocent defensless victim that was attacked by ethan when she lured him into her house with a hallucination of his dead wife, OPENED THE DOORS FOR HIM, and then trapped him in there… the end of donnas fight is even more frustrating when ethan was literally forced to stab angie in order to avoid being stabbed to death by a bajillion dolls but people still take it as “ethan chasing her down”

and i 100% agree with ur take on the hcs about karl… there r so many that r taken as fact just to put him in a more sympathetic light which bothers me alot because its clearly not true… u dont have to try and make ur character look better to like them… sometimes u should just accept a villian as a villian! i remember i used to think karl being taken as a child was canon because it was so widely agreed upon and brought up in arguments that i thought it was real 😭😭

and oh brother… dont get me started on the deal… could u imagine how incredibly OOC it would have been for ethan to take that deal? where after fighting tooth and nail and the expense of his own life to keep his baby daughter safe no matter the cost to turn around and be compliant in using said baby daughter as a weapon…?! naw!!! it wasnt on ethan to have to negotiate with karl to make a better deal, especially when ethan turned him down the first time after being rightfully angry at the insinuation of using rose as a weapon. and karl doesnt explain, doesnt negotiate on his side, he kicks his chair down and threatens ethan, he uses fear to try and get ethan to join him

that is not good intentioned!!! and thats ok!!!! hes a villian!!! his ego got bruised when ethan turned him down! so he got mad and kicked him down the propellor hole! thats not on ethan!

i wish people could appreciate the character for who they r… its not karl if u strip away his arrogance and ego 🥲

(sorry for the lomg ask, i really like resident evil and that post u made was so real…)

ALL THIS EXACTLY!! I have been a Resident Evil fan since the year RE7 came out and let me tell you I was baffled when I played RE8 and saw Miss Kill and Maim and Murder and her cocky cowboy brother be treated like the new Jack Baker. He became infected by protecting his daughter from his crazed wife and he doesn’t even hold the events of the game against Eveline when he speaks to Ethan about

The response Donna gets is particularly frustrating because at least with some of the more sympathetic looks at Alcina and Karl, there are HINTS at the fucked up people they actually are. Donna is essentially turned into an entirely different character.

The closest thing I think I can compare Donna’s fanon characterisation to is Eveline, but even that isn’t entirely accurate. Eveline is ten years old and given that fact as well as her upbringing, if that’s what we can call her being raised as a weapon in a lab, I really doubt she understands the gravity of what she has done. She doesn’t understand why people are angry with her and, as we know from both her and Jack, all she wants is a family. But all this in mind, Eveline can still be quite a mean kid. I don’t blame her for this at all, it’s a completely understandable response for her to have as a young child in her situation, but she is controlling the Baker family to be violent murderers, makes Mia attack her own husband and is particularly malicious towards Rose. Eveline has fun with some of her meanness as well. She laughs at Zoe as she runs off to infect her family, she taunts Ethan before he reveals the neurotoxin that he has, she mocks Rose when she tells her the crystal isn’t in House Beneviento. Again, while I don’t really blame Eveline for behaving this way and she was also entirely a victim, Eveline is also not presented as being a naive and palatable villain.

Donna, in canon, is not Eveline. She’s nothing like Eveline. Eveline is a child who can’t comprehend the severity of what she has done to the Baker family. Donna is a grown woman. A mentally ill woman, yes, but we aren’t shown any signs that said unspecified mental illnesses make her into the weak, incapable and naive version of her character that is so spread around the fanbase.

House Beneviento is inaccessible unless Donna lets you in. You cannot get inside if she doesn’t let you, and she intentionally lures Ethan inside with hallucinations of Mia, who he very recently watched get shot multiple times and die. She makes him give her the only thing he has left of her, the photo of Mia and Rose, before he gets inside, and once he’s in there Donna continues to very specifically target fears Ethan has about protecting his family with the hallucinations.

The flowers didn’t just appear around House Beneviento for no reason. Donna doesn’t think Ethan will have fun physically taking a mannequin of his wife apart or hearing her crying voice over the radio. Genuinely, I do not know how people can look at that baby hallucination, a horrifying recreation of Ethan’s dismembered infant daughter chasing him down through narrow hallways and still think Donna had no ill intentions whatsoever.

Donna’s death is jarring and upsetting, it gives a completely new light to what Ethan was doing and just how intense those hallucinations were, but Donna was not just fleeing Ethan unaware of why he was attacking her and Ethan was not just attacking Donna for no reason. Not only is she swarming him with dolls filled with razors and knives, she’s also mocking him through Angie and suggesting that he is a bad, even abusive father.

Donna is the one of the lords who comparatively has the least reason to be attacking Ethan. While I do not think Ethan was unjustified in the slightest, he did trespass on Alcina’s property and kill one of her daughters and he did make Karl mad because he didn’t take his deal. Those are reasons. Donna just kind of fucked with Ethan because??? Like why did she do that??? She’s a fucked up lady that’s why. And that’s what makes her interesting. House Beneviento is insane and scary and watering down the woman responsible for it all is so boring!

Speaking of Karl, I’m not at all surprised he received the response that he did. He’s a conventionally attractive male villain with a cocky demeanour, a fun voice and a backstory with a hint of sympathy. Of course he gets babied and woobified to no end. I completely agree with you about the headcanons surrounding him. For a while I just felt insane and I was convinced that somewhere in my three playthroughs that I had missed something somewhere, like I found his damp cigar but not the document that explains that he was kidnapped as a child by Mother Miranda. There’s nothing that suggests that in his lines or any of the documents about him, and I think people get so blinded by the Heisenberg that they want to exist that the Heisenberg who does exist fades into the background.

AND YEAH! NO WAY ETHAN SHOULD HAVE TAKEN THAT DEAL! ABSOLUTELY NO WAY! To recap what Heisenberg has done to him at this point, he has:

• brought him to the lords and Mother Miranda where he and Alcina argued over who gets to violently murder him

• put him through his little lycan torture tunnel and almost killed him with that spinning spike cylinder

• forced him through another lycan den where he has to deal with them as well as Urias

• suggested using his six month old baby who has already been dismembered as a weapon to further his own goal

Like fuck no! Get away from me! I’m out of here! Ethan’s primary goal was never to kill Mother Miranda, it was to save Rose, why risk both himself and Rose trusting this man who is not only one of the group of people who have been trying to get him killed this whole time and who has also personally tried to get him killed multiple times before now? Ethan’s main motivation is always to protect his family. It’s why canonically Mia will always be the right choice in RE7, it’s why he ended up in Louisiana in the first place, it’s why he’s here, it’s why he’s kept going even after finding his daughter’s head in a flask on the suggestion that he can save her. He’s not going to use her as a weapon because this guy wants to.

Also SO TRUE ABOUT HEISENBERG JUST NOT EXPLAINING ANYTHING!! I hadn’t thought about that but yeah. Yeah! He didn’t explain a thing clearly, didn’t try to negotiate, just got all mad and threatened Ethan when he said no to his deal.

Karl is a total love to hate character for me. Kind of similarly to Lucas, he’s a mad genius type who likes to taunt Ethan over an intercom while Ethan deals with whatever new horror they’ve made for him to face and just doesn’t shut up, and I wouldn’t have him any other way! His huge ego and over confidence is so fun and it’s what makes him as memorable as he is. Same with Alcina! They’re two total show offs who have done incredibly fucked up shit, Alcina more so, and similarly to Jack while he’s under Eveline’s control it’s this cockiness and extreme nature to their violent actions that make them memorable and entertaining villains.

Donna is scary! She’s really scary! Imagine an adversary you can’t even see, who has complete control over what you see and experience, and is using that to force you through some of your deepest fears. Ethan isn’t her first victim either, and the psychological aspect to what she puts him through is deeply unsettling, taking Donna’s very intentional use of Mia and the fears about Rose being unable to be fixed away from her leaves her with nothing.

Why strip these villains of what makes them fun or scary? It’s a horror game! It’s a Resident Evil game! One of the most memorable Resident Evil characters ever is a very tall man in a trench coat and a funny hat. These games are over the top and campy and it’s also a horror game! There’s going to be fucked up people in it and it’s fine to like them if they’re fucked up! It’s weird that that has to be said!

No need to apologies about the long ask!! Resident Evil 7 and 8 are two of my biggest special interests and I love talking about them, especially about a bunch of very interesting characters who get so watered down and woobified it’s basically not them anymore. Thanks for giving me another excuse to talk about it!