#and isn't all “well he's a traumatized autistic so he's not responsible for any of his actions :(”

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

Thank fuck people don't really do this with Eli, but if they did...

Sorry we put your autistic boyfriend in the fandom and they completely infantilised him. Sorry yeah he's an innocent baby who's never even heard of a sex and doesn't know a single swearword now. Yeah they're treating him like the team kid and calling his friends his parents I'm so sorry about this. Yeah I know he's committed felonies in canon but it doesn't matter it's too late now I'm sorry

[kaija-rayne-author]

Is Solas neurodivergent?

Of course, unless Weekes confirms one way or another, we'll never actually know. But I'd like to point out a few things.

Firstly. I'm autistic/ADHD, so are my kids and I've been an advocate for invisible disabilities, especially those two, for almost a decade now.

I offer an option on my Patreon for parents (or even just people) who need or want advice.

I have a little bit of a clue here. (More like a massive clue by nuke, but I digress 🤣.)

Why I code Solas from Dragon Age: Inquisition as neurodivergent.

1. Mentally ill fits under the neurodivergent (ND) umbrella. There's no way on Thedas that Solas isn't mentally ill.

(Yes, it really does fit. I'm not going to entertain arguments on the topic. It originally meant 'autistic' it no longer means that and hasn't for a long while. Neurodivergent brains = brains that work in any way other than 'the average'.) The antonym is Neurotypical. I tend to abbreviate them. Neurodivergent = ND, Neurotypical = NT.

At the very least, he likely has survivor syndrome. I'd wager on Depression and CPTSD too. (I have these conditions and am comfortable with saying he has a lot of the traits.) The guy was the leader of an enslaved elves rebellion and a war against the Evanuris. In his own words, he got his hands bloody.

No matter who you are, violence, whether you're the perpetrator or the victim, causes trauma to the psyche. And it went on for actual ages. An Age, in The Dragon Age franchise, is considered to be 100 years, so for hundreds of years, if not thousands, this dude has been fighting. Humans can get CPTSD just from a bad childhood. There's no way he hasn't developed it too.

Survivor syndrome is the response of a person when they believe they have done something wrong by surviving a traumatic event when others did not, often feeling self-guilt. (Can we classify Solas clearly with this? Yes, yes we can.)

He wakes up in a world so horrific to him that he can't even conceive of the people as people.

That's a type of disassociation, which is a symptom of many mental illnesses. Depression is the most obvious. He fucked up, he knows it, he's now trapped in a hellscape. (Heeee, we're all trapped in a dystopian hellscape right now and Depression is on the rise, the correlation is there.)

Disassociation is feeling disconnected from yourself and/or the world around you. For example, you may feel detached from your body or feel as though the world around you is unreal.

There could be a few other things there. He'd be a classic case for Disassociative Identity Disorder, for instance, but given the shit rep on the topic, I'm not going there.

2. ADHD

ADHD is still not very well understood by the average person. Sometimes people think it means we can't hold still. But a lot of the time, the H-Hyperactivity portion is only evident in our brains. For me, for instance, I have to constantly be feeding my brain written stuff or I get very antsy and uncomfortable. (ADD no longer exists, we're all ADHD now.) It's why i developed the habit of reading encyclopedias for fun. (Yes, I really do this.)

Solas is constantly reading, or studying, or thinking.

He shows a pretty typical type of temper for an ADHDer several times. Our tempers can be hot, flaring up suddenly for seemingly unexpected reasons. He absolutely does that. Now, there's always a reason for it, but few people on the outside of us will be aware of whatever the issue is.

ADHDers can also experience incredibly fast (compared to neurotypicals) shifts in emotion. Solas does this. Especially in the after the well of sorrows/pre-breakup scene and the break up scene itself. He see-saws emotionally a lot.

He's incredibly creative. He paints (and probably draws at least a little to paint the way he does). So many neurodivergent people are incredibly creative.

Snark. Many ADHDers tend to be snarky or sarcastic because of, well, everything that usually happens to us in life. The snark and salt simply spill out of Solas. Especially on the 'make him hate you' route through the game. Or any time he's around Vivienne.

Finally, ADHDers very frequently have a deep seated drive to change the world and make it better. Stares at Solas. Yup!

3. Autistic

So, firstly, let me say that most people don't understand what autism is or what autistics look and act like.

As an autistic/ADHD person, my experience of life is completely different from a neurotypicals simply because my brain is wired differently.

Reminder that you can't see autism or ADHD. You can sometimes see common comorbids, but without a brain scan, you cannot see autism or ADHD.

I connected and empathize so heavily with Solas because he's a well written, complex character, and because I love anti-heros.

But also because he's exhibits the exact same type of autistic/ADHD traits that I have. (Both autism and ADHD come in different flavours.) Seeing that rep in a triple AAA game was an incredibly powerful experience.

Even though, given Bioware's absolutely shit rep re: disability, it had to be accidental. I credit Weekes with that rep. I read on Twitter they were recently dxd with one or the other (ADHD or Autism, I honestly can't remember which. And up to 80% of ADHDers are also autistic.)

Solas practices esoteric arts. It's a common thing for many autists & ADHDers to learn and practice arts that just aren't as common anymore. Mine? I spin with a spinning wheel, drop spindle, or Andean hand spinner. I make maps. There's several other strange hobbies and skills I've picked up along the way too.

He shows hyperfocus several times in the game. (Hyperfocus is a trait of both ADHD and Autism.)

He stims with his hands a lot. Especially in the kiss scene. I don't recall seeing any of the other characters do this. I'm not talking about the 'dry hand wash' movements most of the characters do. Solas does a thing I do, taps the tips of his fingers against each other. Whoever did his modelling (is that the right term for making a game character?) understood neurodivergency or are ND themselves. Whether they know it or not.

You could even call his painting a type of stimming.

Stimming is where someone will use repetitive motions or sounds to self-soothe. It's really bad to prevent an autistic/ADHDer from using their stims.

I used to have to have a book on my person at all times. I'm late diagnosed, so I didn't know I was using the books as both a stim and a comfort item.

Solas has something autists call 'flat face effect'. Basically, his face is a bit masklike. He doesn't show emotions strongly on his face or in his body language (unless you make him angry 😅 which is also pretty typical for many of us). I've seen rather a lot of discourse about how emotionless Solas appears. I can read him easily, the emotive cues are there, just subtle, like they would be in an autistic & or ADHD person.

He's a decent actor. Now, most autists will agree that we're not innately good at lying or acting. But we're also really good at acting, at least, many of us are by the time we're adults. It comes from having to mask (autistic masking) almost every second of every day just to survive. Masking kills us. So it's not good that we are forced to do it. But it does make many of us incredible actors.

Anthony Hopkins is argueably one of the best actors of the past several decades. He's openly autistic. And he's spoken of how he got to be a good actor. Dan Ackroyd and Darryl Hannah are a couple of others who are out about it. I code a lot of other creatives as being one or the other, but it’s considered rude to assign a diagnosis like that to a living person. That's for them to do.

Solas managed to stay hidden as a 'unwashed apostate hobo' for however long the Inquisition took to fix things. I've seen estimates of 18 months to 2 years. That's a looooong time to be acting like something you're definitely not.

We see in Trespasser that he's not like that at all. But he still sold it so well his reveal at the end of the game shocked many people.

He's a nerd. An absolute nerd about the fade. Nerdery isn't solely the domain of autistics and ADHDers, but it’s a really common trait.

He's stand-offish.

Many autists and ADHDers are rather stand-offish with people for a variety of reasons.

1) We've been hurt so many times because of people refusing to do half the work of communicating with us. (Trust me, autistics and ADHDers are trying ALL THE TIME to communicate with neurotypicals. Y'all could pick up your part of things, y'know?)

2) We've been rejected so often for a genetic condition(s) we can't change. But accommodations for us, which are usually pretty simple and often help neurotypical people too, are considered 'too much'. There's something called RSD that most, if not all, autistic and ADHD folks experience. Rejection Sensitivity Disorder is a bitch kitty and there's no dealing with it well. It hurts.

3) We're often stand-offish while we try to figure out whatever social rules exist in that space/time. We often warm up when we know (or think we know) the rules. Or once we get to know people.

4) Solas is often alone, he's rarely pictured as being with anyone else other than Cole and the Inquisitor. NDs often end up either pushed to the edge of the crowd, or we choose to stay distant as a preventative measure so we aren't rejected.

Food sensitivities: Solas utterly loathes tea. There's a whole cutscene about it. (Fun fact, Solas doesn't like tea because Weekes doesn't.) But that extreme reaction to a relatively innocuous drink is a classic example of a food sensitivity. Most autistics and ADHDers have food or texture sensitivities or both. I can't abide raw tomatoes, and I'll get the urge to cry if I touch corduroy fabric.

Sensitivities can really be anything, but if you know someone who has them, please understand we're not trying to be difficult or to ask for extra attention or to make trouble. The modern world is frankly hell for most autistics and many ADHDers. Brain scans of us when we’re exposed to our sensitivities show that they actually are causing us physical pain. Pain centres in the brain light up like a Yule tree.

Solas is quiet, until he's not. Then he'll talk your ear off. This is pretty common for many of us too.

Solas and the fade. Special interest, anyone?

Special interests: Most autistics and ADHDers have Special interests. It's something that can utterly enthrall us. We tend to want to learn everything we possibly can about the subject we're fascinated with. And we love to share that information. In something called 'infodumping' we're trying to connect with other people. It's one of the ways many of us say we care about someone. By sharing our favourite things. We're also deeply penalized for something we can't change, there, too.

We deeply enjoy the thing and want to share our enjoyment with people we like/love. This can utterly backfire on us, but it doesn't change the urge to share. Often until our audience is giving us the 'dead fish face'. It's where the person's eyes are a little glazed over and they look a bit concussed. Anyone who has ever taught a class of students or is a parent or child caretaker, or is autistic/ADHD knows the look I'm talking about.

I'll stop blabbing for now, but those are most of the reasons I heavily code Solas as autistic/ADHD/mentally ill. Or, in another word. Neurodivergent.

Thanks for reading! If you have the wherewithal I'm a disabled mom of two disabled kids and a tip would help more than you can probably understand. Another way to help is to become a patron. My work of words is my only income and we live well under the poverty line. Like a lot of other neurodivergent people do.

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[artsycloudysleepy]

Fabrication: OCs: SELF + Fragments (The Roll)

(birthdays are day/month format)

Dictionary for terms here!

(The Gambit fact files here!)

(The Royal Flush fact files here!)

(Religion facts here!)

Protectives = 'Left Brain' = Dew, Chichi, Chaaya. In DARK✿FLAW. Creatives = 'Right Brain' = Asuna, Cody, Thunder. In BLANK✿FLAW.

Due to all being part of the same SELF, they share some traits with them and each other. All of them view each other as siblings and refer to themselves as such. No ships between any of them.

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SELF (portrayal)

([???], the Die, the Kid, the Child, the Creator)

They/them, ???, any presentation.

Human, SELF, Guardian.

Dyspraxic, autistic, hypermobile.

This is SELF's portrayal - there's no reference for their real appearance and are meant to be intangible/generally ambiguous.

The SELF is technically the main character of Fabrication as a story, though they're rarely seen in it; their actions and personality are told through others and the Fabrication itself.

In the real world, outside of the Fabrication, something traumatic happened to a child. They didn't take it well, unsurprisingly, and they turned to the first thing someone their age would turn to in order to process distressing events - imaginative play. And as worse and worse things occurred in their life, they used the escapism provided more and more to avoid thinking about their problems. They want to process things. They also find the notion terrifying.

Unfortunately for everyone involved, their fear and insecurities are creeping into the Fabrication. It's becoming more hostile to them, their imaginary friends are suffering, and their Fragments (originally created to project their troubles onto and to avoid loneliness) are mentally deteriorating. The only way to fix anything is by processing what happened through a hundred different lenses. Through their imaginary friends. And how does a child stop their imaginary friends hurting? By tapping into their creativity and imagination, of course, as much of a double-edged sword that may be.

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Dew

(Rain[y], Drop[let], Dewey)

He/she/they, genderfluid, any presentation.

Protective Figment (anxiety, logic), Guardian.

15yo. Birthday: 15/3.

Dyspraxic, autistic, hypermobile, depressed.

Grayromantic, graysexual lesbian.

Backstory:

///TW: suicide mention, SH mention///

Dew has a lot of responsibility. He's always looked after his siblings and SELF, preventing them from doing dumb things (or at least ensuring they do dumb things safely), and worrying over every single outcome of an event. Working on every single new input of stimuli or information and response to it for a child, trying to stay on top of everything from homework to relationships from before they can remember - since they barely classified as a toddler. Unable to turn their mind off for even a minute for the past fifteen years of their life if awake or off some kind of medicine or drug.

He eventually developed severe depression and even worse coping mechanisms due to the pressure and anxiety. He's killed himself before, so many times he's lost count, and always revives. They wish they could just take a break from everything, but can't. She's barely able to get out of bed some days, constantly left in a spiral of work -> hurt -> sleep -> work. It's torture. But she somehow stays on top of everything, somehow keeps her siblings and SELF safe, somehow hasn't broken. He doesn't know how and isn't keen on thinking about it any more than he already does.

More facts

Note: posts about Dew may have TWs on them due to them being depressed and having very unhealthy coping mechanisms (eg. SH, suicidal thoughts and previous attempts). TWs are tagged. Stay safe <3

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Chichi

(Chee, Cee)

note: any blue is meant to be purple. had to layer colours

They/it, genderflor + nonbinary, fem or neutral presentation.

Protective Figment (impulses, self-preservation), Guardian.

15yo. Birthday: 12/5.

Dyspraxic, autistic, hypermobile.

Demiromantic, demisexual, lesbian.

Backstory:

Chichi does what they feel is needed to protect the SELF and influences them accordingly. As a toddler, it was refusing certain foods, avoiding climbing trees, being sceptical of strangers, etc.. Nowadays, it's shouting at others at a moment's notice, doubting themself before saying anything, isolating from others, etc.. And not everyone wants them to do that - the SELF, their siblings, themself. But they run on their instincts; they are them. They can't suppress them - they tried before, and it ended catastrophically, with an entire region (Fenestra) being frozen in time and turned to fireflies; 'the Fall'.

Now, what it needs to do is to hide. Hide from its problems, creeping guilt, relationship issues, and from itself. That's what it tells itself. Worse, it's stuck with its girlfriend's ghost haunting it metaphorically and literally, too. Unwillingly sharing a body with a ghost is bad enough, yet alone the person it loves most and accidentally killed in the Fall (all's fair in love and war). Its main issue right now is finding the balance between preservation through omission/hiding and preservation through truth/seeking others. And it needs to stop running away from its past.

More facts

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Chaaya

(Stripes, Kid)

She/her, demi-girl + demi-nonbinary, neutral presentation.

Protective Wisp (fear), Guardian.

5-6yo. Birthday: 2/2.

Dyspraxic, autistic, hypermobile, mutism.

Backstory:

Chaaya stopped growing older mentally/physically when the SELF was 5-6 years old.

She's scared of her own shadow, and.

More facts

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Thunder

(Storm[y], Plaid, Platinum)

Xe/xyr, genderqueer + agender-spec, neutral presentation.

Creative Wisp (curiosity), Guardian.

13yo. Birthday: 2/2.

Dyspraxic, autistic, hypermobile, blind in right eye.

Aromantic, lesbian.

Backstory:

Thunder lost xyr eye when xe was just turning nine, for reasons xe will never get into. Xe stopped growing older on the SELF's thirteenth birthday. Xe treats their life as a play. Xe also narrates it, to an extent, because xe doesn't want to get involved in the events xemself - xe always hated the spotlight. Xe watches what happens, patient and attentive to the show, claps and cheers, but nothing ever changes. And xe's always watching, unable to do more than tell the story from the empty theatre seats due to xyr fear of being centre stage.

But curiosity always kills the cat, and xe tends to get sucked up in the narrative anyway. To ignore the gnawing realisation that xe is also not doing good and needs to take back control of xyr life instead of faking it all, xe absorbs xemself in photos and humour, to make fun of xyr tendency to be a hypocrite and also prove to xemself xe never needs to be involved to be an idiot or unworthy of attention. No one cares about the director, do they? Yet alone a false one, displacing the real director (SELF) for xyr own comfort. So no one should worry.

More facts

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Asuna

(Azzie, Su-Su)

note: 'grey' colours in drawing are meant to be black.

She/they, genderfae, fem presentation.

Creative Figment (emotions, creativity), Guardian.

15yo. Birthday: 27/8.

Dyspraxic, autistic, hypermobile, ambulatory wheelchair user.

Demisexual, lesbian.

Backstory:

Asuna

More facts

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Cody

(Hacker, Code, Coco)

He/they, genderfaun, masc presentation.

Creative Figment (dreams, escape), Guardian.

15yo. Birthday: 11/10.

Dyspraxic, autistic, hypermobile, maladaptive daydreamer.

Queer, allo.

Backstory:

Cody has always been the fun one. The prankster, the adventurer, the joker, never taking anything too far and just in for the ride. They're the problem child and they try to take as much pride in that as possible, ignoring the voice in their head calling them the attention-seeker instead. They daydream to avoid their issues, but due to their powers over dreams, they're monitoring them for the Fragments and SELF, so don't get breaks at night as they're usually dreamwalking.

The incident hurt him more than he lets on. He's dissociated from reality and doesn't like being grounded. Thinking about his problems isn't something he's used to; he daydreams and ignores his emotions in order to avoid it. Sketch, dream, rinse, repeat. It's routine, it's normal, and he never wants it to change. Despite sometimes being unable to differentiate between dreams and reality because he treads its line so carefreely and constantly, and despite his mental health worsening every day. It's fine. Probably.

More facts

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Pets!

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Socks

(Socko, Socktopus)

He/him, male.

Octopus plushie. Like those reversible ones that show emotions.

Pet of Creatives, mainly Asuna's.

Not... sentient...?

Mute.

Backstory:

A 10yo Asuna was lonely and anxious, so left for the Fabrication to have a moment to themself. Once no one was around, they broke down on a park swing and were inconsolable for a long time. But when they were too tired to cry, they looked up and saw there was an abandoned octopus plush on the swing next to them. She took him, and made up a narrative that he was also discarded and unwanted, so vented to him. For some reason, she knew exactly what he was saying in return, and decided that they should be friends.

Ever since, Socks has been Azzie's friend. She'd never say pet. His colours change in accordance with her most overwhelming emotions and he acts as a comfort item for her. She's opened up to him in ways no one else ever got out of her. If she spends too much time with him, she gets caught up in her emotions and can become a bit self-righteous, as he'll agree with whatever she says unless she's become so upset she feels like even he's out to get her. As for Socks himself? Who knows. No one else is sure he's sentient. Maybe he's just a toy.

More facts

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Sydney

They/it/star, agender.

Residue from SHADE✿FLAW.

Pet of Protectives, mainly Chaaya's.

Sentient.

Chippers and trills.

Backstory:

Chaaya and Thunder found Sydney wandering in SHADE✿FLAW, just-formed from memories in NOOK✿FLAW. Chaaya thought it had lost an eye (it formed with only one, excluding its tail), insisted it needed an eyepatch, and wanted to take it home to find one. Once Thunder got them back to DARK✿FLAW, Chaaya was too attached to say goodbye, and looked the calmest she had ever been around anyone, so Thunder had to talk Dew into adopting an eldritch horror.

Dew was resistant (Chichi avoiding people anyway so uncaring), but gave in with the argument Chaaya could have star as a support 'animal'. And Chaaya made sure to treat Sydney well. She gave star a star sticker for an eyepatch, pets star, plays with star, etc.. And it doesn't require much maintenance like most pets, so Dew doesn't mind having them there. Sydney themself just wants to look after Chaaya, no matter what, so acts like a guard dog (and also as a lap dog) depending on the situation. Chaaya saved them from loneliness and insanity, and they want to return the favour.

More facts

[rabbitindisguise]

(hope it's okay I rambled under your ask op I just. Infodump machine went brrr so I thought I might as well post it.)

The thing about PTSD (of any kind) that convinces me that he's autistic, is that it's fundamentally a protective maladaptive reaction to traumatic events. Autism on the other hand is developmental and focused on interpersonal skills for the most part.

And I think a big part of why I agree with the above response to the ask ^ and think he's autistic is he clearly learned how to socialize with route memorization, rather than organically like his peers. It's the difference between being a native speaker (average character that isn't kabru or Laios), and someone who's learning a second language (Laios and kabru). There's always going to be gaps in understanding the "grammar" and "slang" of socializing and delays in coming up with the right "words." When he starts infodumping he cuts himself off and apologizes. When he makes someone uncomfortable he backs off. Etc. But he doesn't avoid those things in the first place, and I think he kind of intuitively recognizes his shared characteristics with Laios and he doesn't like it (because it punctures the mask and suddenly he's exposed to everyone).

On the other hand PTSD doesn't necessarily imply any social problems aside from the ones directly related to PTSD like trust issues, aggressiveness/defensiveness/helplessness, symptoms of startling and nightmares, avoidance of triggers, limited range or detachment from emotions, disassociation, etc. and it also has clear start point when there's one central traumatic event, and it has to exclude all the things that might be personal characteristics or quirks.

With regard to onset of symptoms too: autism typically presents in early childhood which makes more sense in this context. And autistic symptoms can stay hidden until someone is overwhelmed and/or the situation is something they're not prepared for (like personally a common one I had an issue with was going to the grocery store (sensory overload) and the cashier talks about the weather instead of the generic "how are you" and I start panicking because I didn't prepare a script for that one). Kabru is like, super good at interacting with people except in a lot of situations where Laios does a lot of the behaviors he represses and he doesn't know how to handle it at all. There was no "script for dealing with another autistic person" for him so there's a lot of panels where he literally just blue screens (it's typically read as disgust and stuff- even by him- but sometimes it's about things that aren't disgust related at all, like the "nevermind I don't even want to know" response in the manga where Laios couldn't immediately say if he had a plan or not).

But that is just my theory u_u might not be universal to everyone who thinks kabru is autistic. Definitely also influenced by my own special interest in people, though my interests are much narrower (and not related to anatomy fjndjw)

if youd like, would you talk about why you read kabru as autistic? i see some overlap for him with his masking and obsession with studying people, but nothing stands out to me that doesnt feel better explained by his cptsd. im autistic myself but i feel like im missing something other ppl are getting from him and id like to understand that perspective more

ive already answered this before but it’s more of an intuition thing. if you have extroverted, very social autistic friends, he may remind you of some of them. but heres text from the manga that stood out to me

he had a hobby of observing adventurers that came to the tavern his mother worked at way before the incident happened. so his fixation on humans and anatomy isn’t caused by his trauma, rather it was something he was always interested in

any then after the incident, he was mostly asking milsiril about cultures, languages, anatomy, etc.

it’s even possible that he knows kuro’s language, even though utayans consider kobolds aggressive and unapproachable, because he was genuinely interested in learning it as a kid

he’s a foil to laios, is it’s really easy to infer that his interest in humanity is as unusual as laios’s interest in monsters. he’s self aware, but sometimes his self awareness doesn’t account for the fact his friends don’t see his behavior as normal

but anyway yeah outside of his special interest, it’s mostly intuition. it’s hard to explain… there’s some stuff that are ultra small details, like his favorite food being plain tomatoes. in modern AUs he’s mostly seen wearing t-shirts and comfortable coats like laios, whereas other characters have a diverse wardrobe

it’s kind of like… he knows what traits come off as autistic, so he tries way too hard to avoid them so he doesn’t seem autistic? does that make sense.

[calpalsworld]

Not "autistic anon," but also autistic, (being called maybe ableist made me want to put this out there before go to bed) i thought Zane was depicted that way purposefully by the writers. He has stereotypical traits like taking things literally, and has an actual humor switch. The writers have done things with Zane before like have him lose bodily autonomy (during that one Wu's teas short) and did something with his voice be it making him unable to be understood or talking too loud and the forced pirate voice by Jay. (what you're doing isn't too different from that, right?) I thought it was just a little iffy to distort his body and memory bc that could be interpreted as something not that I'm sure what exactly, it's some kind of disability. I dunno. I'm not good with putting this to words. I hope this makes sense.

Sorry I went to bed but now I’m awake 😭

Also I ended up totally spilling all my thoughts here rather than only specifically replying to you please forgive me context: my scary zane concept design, & my ninjago rewrite i refer to a lot 

Im a little confused but I think I get what you're saying? You're saying the Ninjago writers absolutely DON'T write Zane well (you listed examples of this) and you don't want me to fall into the same trap?

I had the opposite logic earlier. I thought: If Ninjago writers made Zane have stereotypical autisitic traits while also being a dehumanized robot, I may as well embrace it, say he is autistic blatantly, while also making him do funny/cool non-human robot things, so its clear as possible the two aspects of his character are literal and separate and not a metaphor for each other. But you're right! I do have a choice and I dont have to embrace things! :)

Like there were a couple ways I was gonna reject the original, for example, I never wanted Zane to have a funny switch, and I hated how other characters could fuck with Zane and he didn't even care 😬. I want to change that stuff. So youre right, if I am changing shit like that, it would be counterproductive for ME to GIVE him MORE traits along that theme. 😬😬😬 I should try to feel less obligated to portray Zane like he originally is. I still like the concept of "scary zane" (for reasons i explain below the cut) but I might tone it down a bit like with the claws and weird proportions and shit. I’d def make him look more skeletal and undead. That was my original intention, but i didnt execute it as good as I could have.... idk if anyone could tell thats what he was supposed to be like...my bad! But rn I dont wanna redesign him I wanna draw other stuff like normal alive Zane. Sorry LMAO 😳. Like I said in some earlier asks I think, I think Im gonna focus rn on how I should portray season 1 normal not dead Zane so thank you and feel free to share any other Zane thoughts ^_^ SOME OTHER THOUGHTS:

Also I Wanna Argue Some Stuff But I Understand its a Weak Argument Since All of This Context was Just In My Brain (so don't take this as an argument, just as me rambling): I don't want messed up things to happen to Zane and for it to just be ignored. I think if Zane is going to have fucked up things happen to him, as all characters must, its best for it to happen during a season where he actually addresses his feelings about being a robot (learning to accept that he will always be himself, regardless if hes "human" or the "original" or whatever. (thats how I always interpreted his emotions)). But I wouldn't have the other Ninja be very phased by Zane's looks because the whole point is they already love who he is (seasons 1-3 were about getting to know Zane) and now Zane himself just has to learn the physical, robot part of him is okay. Its about person-hood rather than humanity. Because the season focuses around Zane's soul, and because he lost his original body, I feel like I could mess around with his current, temporary body and have fun and make it scary. Because that body should be irrelevant. I understand it possibly being upsetting for an autistic character to be designed like this, but other people I talked to see it the opposite way. They find it comforting for him to look so different but still be himself and be so loved. SO IM ABSOLUTELY NOT saying its wrong to be bothered or to hate it or to feel any way. Just that I personally think it would be cool for Zane to be portrayed with a little spice lol, so thats why I like scary Zane for season 4.

Another Thing I Wannna Say But Is REALLY Hypocritical: (this isnt directed at anyone I just REALLY want to say this) I know I say "this is Zane but scary, he looks like fnaf" so he's obviously dehumanized, but I always felt like "scary" is more of an objective fact. Its an instinct. But what's "not human" is subjective. I think there is a problem with saying anything different from "average" human is dehumanized because that could extend to real people. Lol I know its bad for me to compare FNAF-ass Zane to real people, but I mean he could be real. People can have exposed teeth, and people can be shaped weird. And when someone first sees a person who looks like that they'll probably think "woah those features are scary" by instinct. And that surprise doesn't make someone ableist obviously. But bring that person’s humanity into question is NOT an instinct, and is fucked to shit. This is kinda a bad point for me to make since its about the fictional FNAF Zane I drew, and I am NOT implying ANYONE was thinking like this. [especially not the original asker anon who I am totally forgetting about at this point OOPS]. But I just thought it was an opinion of mine I couldn't go without mentioning when talking about dehumanization and disabilities.

^^^ I think you (anon) understand what I mean and might’ve said the exact same thing as me if you were writing a long ass response? I think this because you started to bring physical disabilities up and you said it was "a little iffy." ^_^ So we agree, but I don't see Zane's relation to real life disabilities as "a little iffy" I see it more like "complicated"? IF THAT DIFFERENCE EVEN MAKES ANY SENSE?????? I feel like a lot of things about Zane are really just complicated and need the right context, rather than the concepts necessarily being wrong -- NOW THAT I THINK ABOUT IT! THATS THE WHOLE REASON I DO THIS STUPID REWRITE! XD thats why a lot of my rewrite SO FAR has been the same concepts and plot beats, but different dialogue n specifics and such. I like a lot of concepts in Ninjago but I dont think they were presented correctly.....! :( So I guess all we can do is wait and see if I make Zane offensive or not....???

Also something about the memory part - yeah i agree i was surprised no one thought that was weird to make jokes out of his memory issues..... BUT I am like 100% firm on making his memory take longer to come back because I think its stupid how quick Zane was able to recover from literally dying. Like its just dumb to me. Hate it. (also bc memory & soul mechanics is ummm kinda important in my rewrite.... for reasons). Another memory thing btw, I was going to make his original amnesia come from hitting his head in an attack against the Skulkin when they stole his dads corpse, rather than his dad fucking choosing to make him forget. (its a sweet & iconic scene, but Um, WHY?!!!?!?!?!?) He has to follow data recovery instructions he finds in his dads diary. I think in that context it makes moments of memory loss somewhat different for Zane's character? Instead of loss of autonomy associated with disability, its a literal violent loss of autonomy associated with being traumatized by physical force. Idk how to phrase it exactly but I think that makes some vibes different?

Sorry, I think I got really distracted, and I don't know if I responded well to your points. Because uhhhh I think I agree with your stance actually? If I understand correctly? Fuck Ninjago writers for making the robot lose autonomy (a stereotypical robot theme) while also making him seem clearly autistic (NOT A HAPPY THEME FOR AUTISTIC PEOPLE) and not addressing it. And also auuugh Zane with a weird body is a difficult topic - kinda sussy pretty iffy.

Lol anyway idk if this made any sense and I REALLY rambled on you. but this was nice 👉👈 more Zane criticism pls love you and i love zane. i hope u dont feel mad at me because then it would be weird that im saying that lol. if you do feel mad at me tho you can send another ask (ILL TRY TO JUST LISTEN NOT RAMBLE NEXT TIME) but assuming ur chill rn, love you thnx

Take this page, don’t mind cole’s ass.

[ae-azile]

I feel like we saw the same post, tbh, since I saw many of those headcanons put down in the tags. Like, I don't disagree with opposing interpretations either since so much interpretation is needed with Kim, but to say a few of the interpretations listed above are OOC fabrications due to being interpreted by fans kind of invalidates their view of him as well. Just because they see him differently doesn't make that viewpoint less of an interpretation than an opposing view. My only experiences with cat!Kim is that it's a joke nodding towards the bar scene so I can't speak on any meta or fics about it. As for trans!Kim, I feel neutral as well since there is no stated proof on his gender identity.

His sexual orientation and sexual/romantic preferences go unstated as well. However, I do tend to headcanon him as demisexual/demiromantic. Or if not that by nature, so subconsciously traumatized by his upbringing that he does not let anyone get close to him unless someone manages to slip past those defenses (since there is canon evidence towards that due to how guarded he gets around people). Chay is the slightest exception.

Despite that interpretation, I accept that it's mine and others may feel differently. Hell, I enjoy reading other interpretations since Kim is so interesting to interpret! I feel like - in some ways - he is the easiest to write in fic since you have the ability to mold certain aspects of him. Chay as well due to his age, the fact he faced so much shit at the end of the series, and his whole life changed. That changes a person. I was more invested in KinnPorsche and VegasPete while watching the show but got sucked into writing KimChay because of their open ending and the wiggle room left to interpret who their characters were and/or were becoming.

When it comes to topping/bottoming and dominant/submissive (different things, but I have the same point about both): I feel like a lot of people tend to read relationships - and more so homosexual relationships - with such strict roles. These strict roles simply aren't cut and dry in the majority of relationships in real life and I feel like Kim gets put into a dominant top role because he's older, not as outwardly emotional, and more prone to violence due to the family he is a part of. The fact is, he has no canon basis for sex. He could be a complete virgin (actually a fan of the virgin!Kim headcanon). He could be a top, he could be a bottom, he could be vers. All I feel is that he would need to feel comfortable enough to be vulnerable with a sexual partner, and when Kim gets vulnerable, he gets soft.

As for autistic Kim, I feel pretty strongly about this one as well. Again, the way he conducts himself can be contributed to his upbringing and trauma, which could make him guarded. But the masking, practiced responses, having an analytical, logical internal monologue, iffy eye contact, and shutting down when he's overwhelmed or someone he is interacting with goes off script tells me there is more to it than that. I don't know if Jeff has spoken about this particular interpretation of Kim, but if he hasn't, idk why this interpretation or any other would be because of Jeff and not Kim? I don't quite understand it, other than assuming they may mean the show's version of Kim and the book series' version of Kim. I probably won't read the books for various reasons. But from what I have heard, the show and the source material are separate entities. So I take Kim as he is presented to me in the show. Jeff plays a part in this presentation, but so do the episode writers, directors, the editors, etc.

Again, the autism interpretation is valid, even if it isn't technically confirmed canon. For most who do see Kim this way, it is likely rooted in education, frequent exposure, or personal experience with autism. And to those who put down this interpretation and disregard it, I have two issues.

1. I feel like this comes from the idea that someone with autism cannot be tough, protective, capable, or ambitious. This is simply not true.

2. It is also likely extremely hurtful for autistic people who see Kim in themselves to have their interpretation dismissed or treated as inaccurate.

Idk, the TL;DR version of this is that I've seen this too, OP. I was surprised by it because with some of it I was like, "It's just a personal preference. Why comment on it if you don't like it?" and then on others I am like, "How do you NOT see it?"

anyway, im sorry for the rants. i'm just tired of people shaming and attacking certain interpretations of kimchay and portrayals of their characters and dynamics. arguments that giving kim's character any softness or writing him as a bottom is "confusing him with jeff" arguments that cat!kim (a fun headcanon born from him canonically leaving dead bodies for chay like a cat leaving mice) is writing him as jeff, arguments that headcanoning him as autistic or trans is ooc and bad...

shit like this is what ruins fandom for people and makes it unwelcoming.

i am autistic. i headcanon kim as autistic because i relate to him deeply and see myself in him.

i write him as a somewhat submissive bottom because i like the idea of characters who are used to violence and desperate for control, giving up control and letting themselves be taken care of. and because i interpret his behavior and expressions in some of his scenes with chay as him being stunned and overwhelmed by chay's love and attention, and i like that.

i write him learning how to accept gentleness and love because my interpretation of his character is as someone who is unfamiliar with these things, touch starved, lonely and scared of attachment, and it feels healing to show him receiving all of these things.

we shouldn't have to defend our interpretations, headcanons and preferences, yet here we are.

[fins0up]

Like guys. Imagine Ayano okay like still "emotionless" (she does feel something but its not as intense as other people. its more toned down??) but like. auoh hard to explain

Section 01. Childhood

Ayano's emotions are more "toned down" and shit. (It's bcs she's autistic /hj [she's autistic but it's both like a curse thing and yeah.])

She had friends and shit during her childhood and like. She did genuinely feel something there! Just not as much as a normal child would

Of course, she tries to confide in her parents but uhm. Not too good of a response here

Her Dad (Jokichi) doesn't respond well, especially since he's probably insanely traumatized from Ayano's mom and despises the thought of his daughter turning out exactly like her mother he kind of is one of those parents that's like "Nu uh. No. You actually feel like a normal child."

While Ryoba feeds... a bit too much into it. Convinces Ayano that she can't feel anything. All the happiness and joy she's experienced from having friends, eating foods, being alive was fake and Ayano was just "forcing herself" to feel those things to appease her friends. (Side Note: there's no way Ryoba is a good mom I'm sorry like ur telling me this manipulative psycho of a person wouldn't manipulate the shit outta her daughter? Fuck no!!)

This kind of forces Ayano to "pick and choose" between her parents for almost anything.

Dinner choices, activities, literally any little thing would have Ayano fighting for one parent or the other

Eventually, this kind of ended up in Ayano favoring her mother. Her mother seemed to "listen," to "understand" and because Jukichi was in such denial... it caused a strain in his relationship with Ayano

Ayano constantly was being manipulated... almost molded into being more like Ryoba. Dressed up to look like Ryoba, taught to act like Ryoba, etc. A little Ryoba mini me.

Ayano still tried to be in-tune with her emotions, but thanks to Ryoba... she really couldn't. There was nothing left.

This left Ayano in a bit of distress... but she just eventually gave into Ryoba, being young... it wasn't like she had a choice.

Section 02. "Taro" Era.

Ayano ends up with... pretty much no "real" friends. Since she was convinced she was "emotionless" she made no effort to establish a good friendship with anyone.

This continues until Ayano gets to Akademi, and finds herself being the same as she has been throughout her schooling days... until she meets Taro.

They bump into eachother in the halls on the way to class, and Taro briefly helps her up. With just that... she falls in love with him.

...And back on the ground, with all of these surging emotions she ends up fainting and earning herself the nickname of "Yan-chan"

When recovered from her fainting spell, she can't help but cry. Was she happy? Sad? She couldn't tell, but what she could do was cry. There's so much going on at once, and the overwhelming surge of emotion is too much to bare.

When Ayano gets home, the first person she talks to about this is her mother!

...Who tells her, well, she has to get rid of any and all "rivals"

And having trusted her mother for all 16-17 (no way she's 18 in 2nd year unless she got held back) years of her life... I mean- why go against her word now?

So, first we have Osana who... she befriends. Since Osana means "so much" to Taro, she saves Osana's cat and befriends her...

...But the twist, the kicker, is that she actually gets to know Osana. Better than she expected.

Ayano tries to drive away Osana after "eliminating" her, by telling her about her "yandere" tendencies, her mother, etc...

It doesn't work? Despite Osana being a bit weirded out, she recommendeds Ayano to go to therapy. See if she can work out her issues (especially with her mother)

Ayano starts to go through a bit of a crisis... isn't she supposed to do the same as her mother did? Eliminate her rivals and keep the one she loves to herself? What do you mean she can just... talk to Taro? Especially since she's friends with Osana?

While trying to "eliminate" Amai, Ayano goes through another surge of emotions and eventually she breaks down to Osana and Raibaru.

Who again, tell her maybe therapy should Be An Option. IDK just a hunch.

At some point, Ayano (with Osana by her side) manages to get a conversation in with Taro. "Test the waters" so to speak.

...And wow, she hates him. Ayano figures out he has "nice guy" energy and after the interaction, talks to Raibaru like "what the fuck??? i love him sm but also??? wtf???"

Another crisis? Yeah, another crisis!

Yeah Ayano is going through it, she hates Taro as a person, but loves him for what he makes her feel... and it doesn't help that she's half-way through the week where Amai plans on confessing to Taro and ruining her life!

Ayano is at a "fork in the road" so to speak. On one hand, her "feelings" for Taro are so overwhelming that she's in love with what he makes her feel... but on the other hand...

She doesn't even like Taro as a person. She doesn't want to kill her rivals either, there's still humanity in Ayano that makes her want to break this tradition of "eliminating rivals and forcing the one you love to stay with you."

Ayano tries yet again to confide in her mother but... things turn nasty quick.

Ryoba isn't happy that Ayano is doubtful, she should know this is what's best for her. She should know that this is how the Aishi's have worked... forever and always. And if Ayano won't do it, guess Ryoba will have to assist.

Ryoba "helps" Ayano find "dirt" on Amai (thanks to Info-Chan) and tries to kidnap and get Ayano to eliminate Amai.

...But Ayano refuses. Again, she's explained that she doesn't like Taro as a person. Why should she eliminate Amai like this? If she barely even wants Taro?

Eventually, Ayano is able to rescue Amai and call the police (despite wanting to prevent the police from coming at all costs)

...Ryoba is arrested. Her case, after all these years is reopened and prosecution gets their guilty verdict on her previous case and this kidnapping one.

Section 03. Present.

Ayano ends up going to therapy, not only because of what just happened because... well, Jukichi forces her to.

He's trying to "undo" what Ryoba has done.

The relationship is still strained, mostly because Ayano "knows" that Jukichi hates her. She hates that she's an exact image of her mother and she knows her dad hates that too.

(In all honesty, while Jukichi does resent and despise Ryoba with a burning passion, he doesn't really hate Ayano. He doesn't blame Ayano for her existance, and he's proud of his daughter for making steps to change and be a better person.)

Ayano has also apologized profusely to Amai, and has since avoided Taro at all costs.

Amai... well, she doesn't totally "accept" the apology, she understands that it wasn't Ayano's doing.

Taro gets a restraining order on Ayano as well (which makes sense)

Amai and Taro end up dating, and for a bit this broke Ayano to her core.

She bleached her hair blond, and started going through style after style.

"Emo," "Kawaii," "Scene," etc.

Eventually this settles into a more... casual punk? If you could call it that?

Ayano has settled into who she is now, and ends up realizing that she is AroAce Bi. Thanks Osana! (/hj)

She may or may not be friends with some of the "ex-rivals" now.

(Oka, Asu, Megami, and Osoro)

She's also taken up doing sports! (Mostly Track) to vent some emotions while not in therapy.

Her life has rlly gotten better, and after mom's arrested it's been... better.

Ayano's more in-tune with herself, and with how she acts. She's learning to trust her own judgement, and that everything is alright.

She's visited her mom in jail... but that hasn't gone well. So, she's stopped doing that.

That's rlly ab it whoops xD lol

guys would u believe me if i said that i like yansim but not in the normal way more in the I like the Concept of like Three Characters (ayano) and would like to expand on them in the most Autistic Way Possible

I REFUSE TO SUPPORT YANDEV IM MAKING THIS DISCLAIMER NOW BCS I DONT WANT PPL TO THINK I LIKE THAT POS

[liminalpsych]

okay but

let's expand on that. (ETA: ...too much expanding. whoops.)

Lancelot struggles with mental illness. That much is obvious from the stories. He is struck with "madness" multiple times and runs off into the woods, sometimes for years, and is "mad" for that whole time. (What does madness mean in this case? It's hard to tell, it was such a catch-all phrase for any kind of mental illness.) He has serious mood swings. He has very poor emotional regulation. He gets downright suicidal at times. (And homicidal, but that's being a knight of that era at times, I guess. Depending on which source material you're talking about.) He tends to battle-frenzy, berserker sort of behavior in the field. He is wholly devoted to Guinevere, to what I'd argue is a rather unhealthy degree, and his madness is the worst when he feels rejected by her.

There are only a few explanations for this.

One option is that he did have a loving mother and happy childhood, and therefore his behavior is due to something organic, neurochemical. There are limited options that fit his behavior:

Bipolar 1 with psychotic features. I doubt this one, I don't think it actually fits, but I haven't read enough source material yet to make a good analysis here. The deep depressive episodes do seem to show up in the stories. The episodic psychosis would fit with the episodes of "madness", though episodes of bipolar-related psychosis don't last for years. Still, we can't expect 12th century (and later) fiction writers to depict psychological conditions accurately, and maybe we can consider it an exaggeration or dramatization. I can see arguments for or against this one.

Other conditions that include psychosis. This is mostly conditions like schizophrenia, schizoaffective, schizophreniform, etc. Also substance-induced psychosis, so maybe we can theorize that whatever he was drugged with in the Elaine of Corbenic situation had long term psychosis as an effect. I think this is a stretch, though.

Autistic (and possibly ADHD). He was basically a changeling, after all, which may well have been the folkloric explanation for autistic people back in those days. There's a body of evidence correlating significantly higher adrenal/cortisol responses to stress and perhaps something impaired in the adrenal regulation part of the brain for autistic folks, which floods the brain and makes it hard to think clearly under stress. (I can link studies on this one, but the language in the research is, um. Not exactly neurodiversity affirming.) Autistic brains statistically have lower levels of serotonin as well. Not to mention the 60-80% of autistic folks who also have ADHD traits (or full blown ADHD), which comes with reduced norepinephrine and dopamine in the brain, and difficulty with emotional regulation and impulse control, plus dopamine-seeking (e.g. the intense relationship with Guinevere) and norepinephrine-seeking (adrenaline, high stress situations, etc). If there's an organic component and he truly did have a loving mother and no childhood trauma, this would be my best guess.

The other explanation is that he only appeared to have a loving mother and happy childhood. The guy has "attachment trauma" written all over his behavior. We can reconcile this a few ways:

Adoptee trauma. Even when adopted as infants, adoptees can experience the separation from their birth mother as traumatic. (This site has a decent discussion of the theories and research on this topic.) Even if the adoptive parents are relatively skillful and meet most of the child's needs, that separation from birth family and questions of identity and history and belonging all make a pretty big impact. Plus he was a cross-cultural adoption, a human adopted by a being of Faerie, which has its own layer of issues.

Perinatal trauma (trauma shortly after birth). Even if his trauma isn't about being adopted, the process of the circumstances of his adoption were pretty traumatic. Fleeing a fallen kingdom, mom tending to his mortally wounded father, and then a faerie enchantress spirits him away to another realm. That will still make an impact, even if the next several years are relatively happy ones.

Unhealthy family dynamics. The Lady of the Lake is either not human, or is a human who's very fae-like, depending on the story. Would she even know what care, time, energy, affection, attunement, and boundaries a human child needs to be provided with? Sure, she taught him, raised him, and gave him lots of extravagant gifts on his way out. I know plenty of people whose abusive parents give them extravagant gifts: as apologies (after abusive behavior), as control tactics (the gifts come with strings attached, obligations and expectations), as compensation (throw material gifts at the child because you aren't around to give them emotional love or social presence). And then he's just flung back into the human world while he's still comparatively young, with no accompaniment? Just "here's some trinkets so you don't die, have fun in the human realm that you've never really experienced before, good luck"? Yikes. That'd mess up anyone.

...now I want to write an exploration of Lancelot's childhood, what could have happened to make him into the mercurial adult he is in the literature.

lancelot is so funny because there is no reason for him to be like that he had a loving mother and a happy childhood like gawain i get u look at his youth and ur like wow yeah i get it. lancelot just woke up and literally chose violence