#and im not judging people it just seems like they’re grasping at the concept without knowing exactly how to talk about it

[wifegideonnav]

so many people have spent time painstakingly crafting polls on here that could literally just be boiled down to “do you believe in mind body dualism or do you believe in something else”

[legilimensxsnape]

How to stay sane when arguing with Snaters

1. Feel the energy before If the post is too hateful, makes you feel overwhelmed or you just feel a very bad energy coming from it... don’t read the comments. They’re going to be worse. If you really want to write something, come back later once you had time to feel better. It’ll allow you to control your emotions if (and when) a Snater will reply. Choose your battles, kid.

2. Feel the energy during Is the other person insulting/disrespecting you? Are you feeling okay? Is the other person just doesn’t want to understand anything? They’re like a wall? Do the comments have a bad energy (for example, hateful)? Don’t allow the other person to drain your energy. You can leave whenever you want. You say goodbye and that’s it. It’s not about winning the debate.

3. How is the other person? Are they disposed to receive your opinion/argument? Are they open-minded? Do they respect you? Are they willing to understand your point of view? If right from the beginning, they start saying Snape is a racist and incel piece of shit who deserves to die, you might just want to leave it. They’re just irremediable and it will be hopeless to try to have a debate with that kind of person. If they seem to be nice and not too hateful, you can counterargue. You’ll see how it goes. If they just say “I hate Snape.”, that person is not necessarily looking for a debate. No need to argue with them. If you want to know why, just ask them. Depending on the answers, you’ll need to judge if that person is opened to your counter-arguments and if you think you might change their mind on certain points.

4.  You can’t change everyone’s opinions How many debates I’ve had? A lot. How many I’ve “won” (made the other person change their mind on Snape/James)? Too little. That’s why you need to ask yourself if it’s worth the effort.

5. Immature people with no knowledge of psychology That’s what I see the most in Snaters. They are young, have no experience in life and don’t know shit about psychology. Some are just not fully evolved yet to understand your point of view and won’t do anything to hear what you have to say. Psychology is complex and so is Snape. If the other person is too immature to grasp a psychology concept, life values/principles, anything that has to do with “the more experiences you have in life, the more you understand how it works”, don’t expect them to understand what you’re trying to say. How many times have I told Snaters that Snape called Lily a mudblood because he was being humilliated in front of the whole school and lashed out on her because he was losing control and tried to gain it back with the only way he found. That he didn’t mean it, that it’s what abuse does to some people, that he apologized and it was his worst memory ever. How many times have I been told that I was justifying what he told her?

6. Basic arguments He was obsessed with Lily, he was Neville’s worst fear, he insulted Hermione, he bullied kids, he almost killed TREVOR, etc. To be honest, they’re 90% of what a Snape lover has to deal with! They’re easy to answer and you might win some debates by changing their opinions because they’re mostly people who followed the pack and use those arguments without even understanding them. But once again, if they’re not opened to what you have to say... not worth it. Just say ciao.

7. They don’t make sense You say something, they understand something else, and now they distort what you said and created a whole new argument? Yeah, welcome to the club. You say that Snape was abused as a child and now they say you glorify child abuse. See what I mean? Here is an example of what happened to a friend recently:

Her: “Hagrid caused Dudley great trauma, a big fear of wizards and fat-shamed him. No, I don’t dislike Hagrid, but I hope you do, as he did awful things to students too.” Snater: “Sis are you really telling me that Hagrid is worse than Snape, the man who emotionally and physically abuses kids?” Obviously, my friend wanted to show that Hagrid also did bad stuff and the Snater distorts what they said and change her argument into “Hagrid is worse than Snape”. When they start to put words into your mouth, run! It happens frequentely. No fucking idea why they do that. I guess they don’t know how to debate.

Another weird thing they do: they change the subject. You’re talking about Snape’s greasy hair and how it might be caused by his depression, and the next thing you know is that Trevor almost got MURDERED by Snape. You’re like.. “the fuck? I was talking about hair?” They don’t follow the rules of a debate. You open an argument, you end an argument. They’re out there opening parentheses wherever they want and never coming back to what you said. Which means that 1: you never concluded the argument, 2: you already have another argument to answer, and 3: it means they are not paying attention to what you have to say. This often happens with another thing: the word-vomiting arguments. They say every goddamn arguments they can think of and that’s it, that’s the debate. It’s up to you if you want to counterargue or not.

8. Don’t put too much energy in this Not worth it.

9. Verify who posted the post If it’s a Snape hate account or a Marauders fan account... think about it.

10. Disrespectful snaters & bullies Don’t worry, it’s not personal. Something’s wrong in their head and that’s it. They’re hypocrites. Blocking is an option for those cases. Don’t play their game. Sometimes I like to act stupid when I see it’s a dead-end.

11. They want to make you feel bad Here’s a comment from the previous Snaters, talking to my friend after her ending the conversation: Snater: “byee (kisses and heart emojis) at least the convo ended w me knowing im not a toxic person apologist (in love emoji)” So yeah. If you’re called a racist, an abuser, a KKK member, a Nazi, a whatever-you-want apologist (for example, Sn*pe apologist (which is the worst, in my opinion))... Don’t worry. They like to say that to everyone who likes a dickhead like Snape. I doubt they understand the meaning of those words. They’re hating on Snape for saying mudblood but hey ho, it’s okay to bully and insult real people, uh? Just saying that we all know we aren’t bad people for loving Snape.

Last point: No every Snater is like that!  Thanks to them. Don’t assume every Snater you encounter is hateful. But from my own experience... a lot of them are lol! Isn’t it surprising? They hate Snape for being the way he is yet they are very hateful person themselves. Just be respectful yourself and block them if it’s too much for you. Feel your emotions, understand them and control them! ♥ Don’t put too much energy in defending Snape. He’s a fictional character after all and your mental health is way more important.

Also, keep going, Snape lovers! The vast majority of you are open-minded, kind and smart. That’s why you gotta spread kindness. Love you and have a good debate x

[pri5cillasanchez]

05/28/20

Everyday I ask myself- “Are you actually happy, or are you still trying to convince yourself and others you are?” I know I wrote in my last post that I truly believed I am happy. I wanted to believe I was, possibly even to the point where I was beginning to fool myself. Today, I feel differently from when I wrote that post. I’m starting to realize no matter how content I believe where I am in my life, the feeling is always fleeing and never permanent. When that glimpse of happiness is finally in my grasp, it seems as though I can never hold it. I don't understand why but I long for all of this confusion to make sense someday. Do I continue to strive for that happiness that I crave so badly? Or do I finally stop and attempt to find a middle ground in all this chaos that is so called life and my thoughts. I made a friend at work and he is the most genuine and optimistic soul that I’ve met in such a long time it feels like. He’s synonymous to a breath of fresh air to talk to, like the first breath I take after stepping out of a car from a long road trip into the forest- that calming, relieving feeling. I don't feel afraid to open up to him as opposed to the mask I have to put on and the perfect image I have to portray when conversing with others. I feel as though if our friendship continues to grow, the more we will inevitably and surprisingly learn from one another. It’s like how the quote from Carl Jung goes: “The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances; if there is any reaction, both are transformed.” I like to believe that throughout life, we encounter endless interactions with others that will in one way or another help us grow, whether that be through a process of suffering or love. I believe I genuinely value this connection I made with my coworker because there's something very pure and kind about his energy. As I've mentioned earlier, I feel as though I have to wear a mask around most people in order to seek approval, or not be judged for feeling misunderstood. I think that's always been my problem throughout life growing up, constantly feeling misunderstood and not feeling as though I belong anywhere or with anyone. Im not even sure if I’ve found where I belong yet or a set group of people I can trust entirely as my people. To this day, I’m still not sure either whether I find a calmness in that thought that I may never feel as though I belong to a place or person, or if it truly terrifies me. Because of this, I’ve gotten incredibly skilled at adapting to different environments and recreating my external persona and image to “fit the part”. So well that I feel like I’m slowly losing grasp of who I was, and that scares me. Part of me believes this transformation is supposed to be evidence of a good thing, since our personalities are supposed to change the older we get and the different life processes we go through. In some situations, this new version of myself has been extremely successful for me- such as with my family, work, my boyfriend and new friends. However, in other aspects of myself that I used to value with every ounce of my heart, those passions that used to burn my core in its entirety- writing, reading, philosophy, psychology, art, spirituality, photography, music, conversations with depth and intellectually stimulating, analyzing everything, freedom, others oriented, abstract thinking- those passions that used to make me feel free even just being in one place, I feel as though they’re fading away from my memories the more I become this new version of myself. This new version of myself- I’m grateful it has gotten me to where I am now in life, revolving around adapting to that “successful” personality. Extravert, confident, working out, money, my career, taking the lead/being in charge, less empathetic towards other and more revolved around my own personal success and growth, a more concrete method of thinking. But at what cost was it to adapt this new persona? Is this why I’m addicted to going away somewhere in the forest or road or wherever and being away from everyone any chance I get- to escape the guilt I feel within? The one thing I am sure of is that I tend to go away often because I long for that feeling of freedom, something I do not feel at all back home or work  or even surrounded by the people I grew up around. I don't feel as mentally unstable as I used to be so at least I'm not in that dark hole again. But it feels more like I’m my heart is being pulled in opposite directions, causing me to feel confused and saddened at the thought that my inner self isn't aligned with my outer image. Not saddened to the point where I can fall back into a deep depression again, and it’s honestly manageable to live like this forever. But what kind of quality of life is that where one can't even live authentically and become dull? It reminds me of a concept explained in a book I read called The Divided Self by R. D. Laing, there is out internal selves and our external selves. The more distant and disconnected these personalities are, the more disarray and conflict you will feel within yourself, ultimately leading to a deep underlying anxiety and inner guilt. It makes me wonder is this simply a normal process of “growing up”- losing parts of yourself that you never imagined would be. Numbing all the feelings and emotions that make us human and truly feel alive and free, masked with the motion of automaticity in this society we live in that revolves around work, money, and power. That’s why I value so much that sudden yet incredibly meaningful interaction with my coworker, because it reminded me that there are those very few people that you’ll eventually cross paths with, and they’ll understand without judgement what you’re going through because they've been there. That brief conversation I had with him made me recollect on some aspects in my life, helping me realize maybe the way I've been dealing with my issues hasn't been the answer all along, and that I’ve just been trying to numb the anxiety by attempting to escape it. Although everyone copes with their battles differently, as mine is going away every chance I get, I’m happy he’s found a way to deal with his battles in a more constructive/healthier approach through psychedelics. I hope he’s truly found the inner peace he deserves for being such a genuine soul, and that it lasts. The idea of indulging in psychedelics again as an approach towards healing sounds inviting to me, but at the same time I think I’m afraid to face my demons I’ve been pretending don’t exist anymore. Or I’m afraid it’ll allow me to delve deeper into my thoughts, which is a frightening place in itself. It helped me the first time get myself out of an extreme depression, I don't know why I feel so hesitant to try it again.

[from-a-small-room-in-london]

MAY 10th ‘18

I’ve felt off before, but today is the first time I’ve felt like this.

I like how the forest is leaning .

Anxiety? Is that what it is? Head is spinning. Everything feels like a rush. I’m not OK. Grasping at straws. Reaching out. Everyone is busy. I’m late for things that you can’t be late for. Holding on to the ground. 9%... 8%. Everything is moving too fast. Who needs attention. Apparently I do. I can't write. Can’t focus thoughts. I miss people I don’t usually miss. People pass through. Where is she passing to? To fall in love you shouldn't have to try. Living off other people’s lyrics, like finding truth in hard times in words that aren’t mine. Andreas wrote a song about a rainy day. English tea. I cried when he played it for me, because he played it for me.

The lights went out, you were fine. You kind of struggle not to shine.

Dermot got to play with Glen and I’m watching people live my dream and I’m jealous. Avoid boys who like Hemingway and Self Reliance, but weekends in bed are fine. Dalliance. Dalliance?

Do I get to choose? There’s no point calling right now, or maybe it’s the best time to call. It’s 20 minutes past and he’s still playing away. That doesn't seem right. People apologise for things they don’t feel like apologising for, because they’re supposed to, but they’d do it all over again. I’d do it all over again. Grasping at straws.. I want to go on tour with Milo. I want to go. Spend one last summer, get everything on track, then leave. Derail the train like a terrible conductor. I need a new sentence. .

The sun is a few feet away and I'm sitting in the shade. It’s a little cold here and thats not metaphorical. It’s literal. Smoking doesn’t make you cool, but she said I'm not a sexy smoker and I never thought anyone was apart from those people on Tumblr who can take pictures but I can't take pictures. Imagine if she could. Imagine sitting on the windowsill in Poland asking her to stop smoking because it’s bad for her while I exhale and not enough smoke ever comes out. Everything smells like dried Tobacco. I felt really good yesterday. I’ve felt great for lots of days but today is different and tomorrow will be different. Imagine being able to use this and be productive. Imagine actually finishing something. There’s romance in failure but only if you can finish it. Someone needs to start taking up my time and fucking with my head but everyone’s busy. I can finish this but this won't support a family. Imagine being able to support a family with this. Imagine making a human being and being able to not fuck with it’s head. We shouldn’t be able to make humans if We’re not finished. The whole concept is fucked. The music isn’t messy enough. Let’s stop making pleasant things because people can find that anywhere. Let’s start making things that let people feel like this.

This is honest. Honest is good. I have to be really careful with honest because sometimes it hurts people, and they don't always want to be hurt anymore. Conversations with Strangers because they always share the pain and pass it on but I never have conversations with strangers. I tell people I’m not OK and I laugh because it’s silly, really. I can't breathe properly. Breathe properly. Breathe in for 6 and breathe out for 6 but I can't count without a clock. That’s not metaphorical it’s literal. This is honest.

If we breathe together maybe it’ll be easier. Maybe we’ll be on the same page. Maybe there isn't a page. Maybe I’ve lost the mark and that’s not literal that’s metaphorical. He's reading a book and the bookmark is on a different page and that’s not metaphorical it’s literal. I feel like getting sick but I don't want to. I'm scared. I don't have to imagine breaking my voice down because I’m doing it and I think that’s a good thing but I might lose something along the way.

I write because I don't know what I'm saying until I write it down. You are I am not better than him. Maybe I can get down to his level and maybe then I can finish things but he’s not finishing anything. I think he's done. He’s made a human being and he can't do it properly but who am I to judge?

Last but not least, here’s the man on borrowed time. Two kids now and a third still born when god commits his crime.

Borrowing pain to create.

I am not doing this for you and I think that’s great. It’s just a little tragic. I am doing this for me and I think that means I’m in trouble because whether you’re watching or not I’ll be here. I just do all of this hoping she’ll see me.

It’s not too late to travel and it’s not too early because everyone I meet is doing this and they’ve finally become part of what I say.

I think people make things when they are very very sad. I think sad is a nice word. I think I can make something out of this. She can’t hear this song anymore because it reminds her of Poland when I asked her not to smoke. He's going to the end of society and I’m going to the end of me. where else can I go?

I will talk when I’m ready, but Im still scared of letting go.