#and idk why i added the corset i just think he would

[linthehero]

boy howdy do i love drawing characters different from how theyre actually supposed to look just for the fun of it, anyways sorry this is just a small low effort drawing i did on vacation but here’s my bobby worst interp

[daddyslilchickenfingers2]

Noise Complaint (Chris)

Request: none

Warnings: secret relationship, semi public sex(hotel room), protective triplets, slightly possessive chris, degradation, filming/pictures, praise kink, daddy kink, getting caught by a fan, being found out by Matt and Nick, super rough sex, dom!chris, lingerie, choking, slapping, spanking, oral(male receiving), cum swallowing, creampie, facefucking, hair pulling, choking, maybe more idk

A/N: this was written when they were on the versus tour which is why it obviously mentions the tour

Y/n’s pov

We were going into week three of the boys’ tour and it was getting increasingly harder for Chris and I to hide the fact that we’re dating. Nobody knew, not even his brothers or Madi, who’s my best friend. At home, it’s a lot easier to hide the fact that we’re dating because Chris and I have always been super close, so us going to “hang out” alone wasn’t abnormal. Thankfully I was invited to go on tour with them since Madi couldn’t go this time, meaning I would have to share one of the two rooms with one of the triplets. You’d probably expect me to be sharing a room with Nick, which I wouldn’t mind considering he’s one of my best friends, but Chris had managed to convince both Matt and Nick to let him sleep in the same room with me by claiming he needs to cuddle with someone when he’s not sleeping in his own house. Since we’d usually get one room with two beds and the other with only one bed, neither Nick nor Matt wanted to have to share a bed or cuddle with Chris so they had “forced” me to be the one sharing a bed with Chris. Not that I was complaining anyways.

This was basically the only time when we could be completely alone however, Matt and Nick always had the room next to us meaning we could never have sex if fear of them hearing us. Luckily for us, the hotel we were staying at tonight only had rooms on separate floors. Currently, we were at the venue getting ready for the meet and greet as we just finished the show, everyone was still dressing in the color for their team. My color being red, I wore black cargo pants with white stitching, a red belt, a red corset top, and red Jordans, I paired my outfit with some silver jewelry and some basic makeup, adding winged eyeliner and red lipstick. As soon as I walked out of my dressing room, Chris pushed me back into it, “You look so fucking hot right now babe, I don’t know how I’m gonna control myself out there.” he said trying to go in for a kiss but I had to swerve it. Chris started pouting as I said “Sorry handsome, I don’t want to get any lipstick on you. We don’t want anyone to find out we’re dating, remember?” “Yeah, yeah, I just don’t know how I’m going to control myself out there because if I’m being honest, all I want to do right now is rip your clothes off and fuck you.” he said as we walked towards the door to leave.

We met back up with Nick and Matt as we all walked out to the meet and greet area and started taking pictures with fans. There was this one guy who came up to me and started flirting, I could tell that Chris was irritated but it’s not like he could do anything about it. “You’re hot, can I get your number and take you out to dinner? You know, maybe I can get you away from these boys and show you what I can do.” the guy said, making me slightly uncomfortable. Luckily for me, Nick saw this and came over to us “Hey man, can you not talk to her like that and move on to she can take pictures with non-creepy people? Thanks.” he said shooing him away. The guy did leave, but Chris still kept looking at me out of the corner of his eye to make sure nobody else bothered his girl.

After the meet and greet, we had all decided to go get dinner at a restaurant, and guess who just so happened to be our waiter? The creepy guy from earlier, and I think all the boys could tell he was making me uncomfortable. Due to this Nick ordered for me so I wouldn’t have to talk to him and we got threw dinner without an incident, well except for when we got our receipt, which had his number on it. I could literally feel the jealousy radiating off of Chris as we waited for our Uber, “Chris what’s wrong? You look super pissed off, are you okay?” Matt had asked him. “I’m fine, I just want to be at the hotel already.” Chris replied through gritted teeth making both his brothers give him a weird look before we got inside the Uber and went back to the hotel. Laura had met us in the lobby, handing us our room keys and telling us our room numbers as all five of us piled in the elevator. Laura got off first, then Matt and Nick, as soon as the doors closed Chris grabbed my hand, “I don’t like people flirting with you, I wanna punch them all in the face.” he said while rubbing his thumb across the back of my hand as we walked to our room

As soon as we got inside our bedroom, Chris pushed me up against the door “I want my fucking kiss now, you’ve had me so hard all day.” he said before capturing my lips in a kiss. I wrapped my arms around his neck, playing with his hair as our kiss turned into a heavy makeout. He started pressing his body against mine so I could feel how hard he was before he pulled away, “I’ve been waiting to do that all day. God, Y/n/n you look so hot in this outfit, shit I never thought you wearing red lipstick would make me so fucking hard, you’re gonna have to start wearing it more often.” Chris told me. I had a little surprise for him, I had just been waiting for when we could get the chance to fuck on tour, I bought it at one of our stops after hearing Chris say I looked hot in red a million times. “Would you do me a favor?” I asked him in a seductive voice, continuing to speak after he nodded “Can you go stand in the bathroom for like five minutes, please? It’ll be worth it, I promise you’ll like it.” “Ughhh you know I don’t like surprises!” he whined. “You’ll like this one I promise!” I told him as I shoved him into the bathroom, I quickly went to change into a pair of red heels and a lacy red lingerie set before quickly reapplying some lipstick.

I sat down on the edge of the bed before telling Chris he could come out, “This better not be som- holy fuck!” he cut himself off as he stopped dead in his tracks a few feet away from me. “Do you like it, baby?” I asked innocently, he was at a loss for words, only being able to mutter out a delayed “Uh-huh, really like it…” as I stood up and walked over to him. Chris couldn’t stop staring at every move I made, I grabbed his hand and led him over to sit on the bed. He slid off his shirt and shoes as his eyes continued to scan my body, “Are you just going to sit there and stare at me or are you going to use me like I planned on letting you?” I said as I traced my finger across his jawline, tilting his head up to look at me. His lips were wet and red as he kept licking and biting at them and his eyes were so blown out that you could barely see a small sliver of blue.

Chris quickly stood up to take his pants off before sitting against the headboard, pulling me with him “As much as I love those heels, Imma need to take them off because you’re gonna be real uncomfortable wearing those in a bit.” he said making me take them off, instantly pulling me onto his lap when I was done. He grabbed the back of my head before smashing our lips together in a hot and needy kiss, he swiped his tongue across my bottom lip while pulling me hair causing me to gasp, giving him a chance to slide his tongue into my mouth. Chris suck and licked my tongue and lips, letting out a deep groan when I started slowly grinding on him, his hands quickly making their way down to my ass with a tight grip. He slowly pulled away biting my lip, “God, I’m gonna fuck you so hard tonight! You’re gonna be so full my cum like the filthy little whore you are, gotta show you who you fucking belong to after that guy flirted with you today!” he growled into my ear.

I knew he was serious when he said I’d be filled with his cum considering neither of us had cum since tour started. I started trailing kisses down his neck and chest, disappointed that I couldn’t leave any hickies “Look like such a slut right now, wish I could take pictures and shit because you look fucking hot.” Chris groaned. I stopped kissing his body and looked at him from between his legs with an innocent smile “Who said you couldn’t? You can take videos of me sucking your cock or fucking me for all I care.” When I said that Chris groaned and his cock twitched. You could tell he was constantly dripping precum from the growing wet patch on his gray boxers. After a second he stood up and grabbed my wrist, dragging me with him before he grabbed his phone out of his pants “Get on your fucking knees for me, I’m taking you up on that offer.” he said while caressing my face before pushing me onto my knees.

He pushed down his boxers, stepping out of them before he tapped his cock against my lips, I quickly opened my mouth and stuck my tongue out waiting for him to put it in my mouth. He placed his thick cock onto my tongue before thrusting into my mouth, pushing some hair out of face while I sucked on the tip. “Can I really record you baby?” he asked while caressing my face, I pulled off of him for a second, using my hand to continue to stroke him. “Yes baby, you can record it and take pictures of whatever you want tonight.” I told him before deep throating him, Chris let out a loud groan before he started to record me. I looked up at the camera innocently as I started sucking him off “Put your hands behind your, I’m gonna fuck that pretty little face of yours.” he said as he placed his hand on the back of my head.

I placed my hands behind my back as Chris started slowly thrusting his cock into my mouth, I hollowed out my cheeks making him let out a low groan. He started fully fucking my face roughly causing me to gag when his tip would hit the back of my throat. I started to whine and moan against him when he started fisting my hair and pulling it, the constant abuse of my throat combined with him pulling my hair caused tears to start falling down my face. “God, you look so pretty like this for me! Next time I’m gonna cum all over your slutty face!” he grunted out, making me whine around him again. I felt his cock twitch before his grip on my hair got tighter and he’s thrusts grew erratic. “You gonna let me cum down your slutty little throat baby?” he asked, I moaned around him as a response before his hips sputtered.

Chris shoved my face down so his cock was literally down my throat, my nose pressed against his pubic bone. “Fuck baby, so good for me.” he praised as he came before pulling out of my mouth. “Open your mouth for me.” he said making me quickly oblige, showing him my mouth full of cum. “Swallow.” I did as he said, sticking my tongue out to show him I did what he asked before he stopped the video. After he caught his breath he helped me stand up, “As hot as you look in this I need it off, right now.” he growled helping me take the lingerie off. Once Chris had helped me undress, he cupped my face in his hands to wipe the dried tears and mascara off my cheeks. Chris sat up against the headboard again, telling me to sit on his lap. He grabbed my throat to pull me into another rough kiss harshly sucking on my tongue, groaning when he felt my wetness spread across his cock, which was already hard again.

Quickly flipping us over, pushing my right leg up against my chest before slamming into me. I let out a loud moan as he gave me no time to adjust before he was pounding into me. “Fuck, so goddamn tight for me! You like being treated like a slut don’t you? Such a good girl.” he grunted as I scratched my nails done his back. “Yes! Yes, your good girl daddy! Please, so good!” I moaned incoherently. “Please what baby? What do you want?” he asked me but I couldn’t explain what I wanted as he was pounding into me so roughly and it felt so good. Since I was whining and moaning so much I just grabbed his hand, making him lightly slap my face. “You want me to hit you? God, you’re such a kinky whore!” he loud groaned before actually slapping my face making me let out an extremely loud, high pitched moan as I came around him. Chris grabbed my jaw harshly, getting closer to my face “Fucking bitch! I didn’t say you could cum, you didn’t even fucking ask!” he growled at me before slapping me again as I cried out, quickly becoming overstimulated. “Open your damn mouth!” I did as he said before Chris spit into my mouth making me whine “Fucking swallow bitch!” he said and I quickly obliged.

Me and Chris have never had such rough sex before but we were both living for it, not even registering the fact that we were in a hotel room and the people next to us could probably hear our moans. Chris suddenly pulled out making me whimper, “Hands and knees slut.” he ordered and I quickly did as he said. He pushed on my back making me arch it before he licked from my clit all the way to my ass hole, loudly groaning as he pulled away. “I’m gonna fuck your tight ass one day and you’re gonna let it happen.” he said before slapping my ass. “Chris please, need your cock back inside me.” I begged “You’re fucking greedy aren’t you?” he asked rhetorically as he ran his tip through my folds teasingly.

Chris then started thrusting into me at a slow pace, “Faster daddy, please!” I asked in a whine voice. He started thrusting quickly and hard, his nails digging into my hips as a form of leverage. Both of us were being extremely loud at this point since this new angle felt amazing, he had leaned forward to play with my nipples. He knew my nipples were extremely sensitive so he used that to his advantage, relishing in the fact that he was the only person to make me feel this way. With the combination of Chris playing with my nipples, aggressive thrusts, and loud groans he was letting in my ear were getting me extremely close to cumming again. “Mmm please can I cum daddy? Feels s-so good don’t stop! F-Fuck please!” I cried out making Chris let out an almost animalistic growl in my ear. “You can cum but I’m not fucking stopping!” he said moving one of his hands to my throat. I came around his cock for the second time tonight, crying as I was extremely overstimulated.

Chris pulled back to sit up straight again on his knees when suddenly our hotel phone started to ring. He slowed down his thrust, making me whine before going to pick up the phone. “Be quiet baby.” he told me, still slowly pumping in and out of me, Chris cleared his throat before actually answering the phone. “Um hello?” he asked confused, I started thrusting back against him causing Chris to completely stop moving and slap my ass harshly. “Uh oh okay, y-yea. I’m s-sorry.” he replied to whatever the person on the other end of the phone said before hanging up. Slapping my ass one time before flipping me over, looking down at me with a stupid smile. “We just got a noise complaint, but that doesn’t mean I’m gonna stop. It just means you need to shut the fuck up!” he laughed before thrusting back into me.

Chris once again started thrusting into me but this time he smashed our lips together in an attempt to stifle my moans. These thrusts weren’t as rough as before, but they were still quite fast as we were both nearing our orgasms. We pulled away for just a second, Chris saying “Shit baby are you close? Because I’m about to fucking cum in you!” I just nodded in response not wanting to be loud again. He brought his hand down to rub my clit in fast, tight circles as he pressed our lips together again. After a few more thrusts, I was cumming around his cock with a whine, this caused Chris to cum as well. Filling me up before slowly pulling out, using his fingers to collect the cum dripping out of me only to shove them in my mouth a second later. He laid down next to me as we caught our breath for a minute.

Once our breath was back to normal Chris stood up before grabbing my hand and helping me up as well. My legs were trembling and it was kind of hard to stand but we silently walked over to the bathroom. Chris told me to pee while he turned the shower on, going back out into our room to grab our toothbrushes, my hair brush and, my makeup wipes before returning. We took a quick shower using the soaps that the hotel had in there before we got out. Chris wrapped one of the big white fluffy towels around me before grabbing another one for himself, I grabbed one of the smaller towels to wrap my hair in making chris giggle. “You look cute like that babe.” he said sarcastically as we got ready to brush our teeth. I used a makeup wipe to get the rest of my makeup off my face and some red smudges of lipstick off from around Chris’ lips. He insisted on blowing my hair so I didn’t argue and just let him do it since my legs were still shaky and I was tired.

Once we were done in the bathroom we went over to our suitcases to get changed, I wore an oversized shirt and panties while Chris just wore some boxers before we climbed into bed and went to sleep. We woke up at 7am as we needed to get back on the bus to drive to our next location, quickly getting dressed in some comfy clothes and brushing our teeth before gathering our things to meet Nick, Matt, and Laura in the lobby. Unfortunately for us, we walked out at the same time as the person from next door that made the noise complaint. We were just going to ignore her until she said our names, “Y/n? Chris? You guys were the ones fucking extremely loud next door?” she asked making us both blush and turn around. Chris awkwardly scratched the back of his neck before sheepishly nodding “Oh my god are you guys dating!? That’s so cute I love it! Oh shit did I ruin your night last night?” the fan said super fast.

“You can’t tell anyone about this!” Chris and I said at the same time, not wanting this to get out. “We don’t want anyone to know we’re dating yet, not even his brother know so could you please keep this private and between us?” I asked nervous. She agreed to do so as long as we followed her fan and main accounts on insta, which we obviously did before taking a quick picture with her. As we started to walk away, Chris turned around again “Oh and by the way, you didn’t ruin our night, you just made us realize we gotta be more quiet.” he said while laughing. We got into the elevator to go down to the lobby when Chris grabbed my waist and pulled me in for a quick passion kiss, pulling away right before the doors opened. Nick and Matt got into the elevator with us, Nick seemed to be oblivious but Matt gave us a weird look. “Why are you two blushing and shit?” he asked suspiciously, but luckily for us the elevator doors opened and we walked out to meet with Laura to go to the bus. Once we got settled in on the bus, Matt looked over to Nick before saying “You owe me 50 bucks, they’re definitely dating so pay up” making Chris and I blush.

“How do you know that? We’ve been so careful!” Chris exclaimed as Nick looked at us, irritated because he owes Matt money now, “I don’t know, maybe it’s the because she’s wearing your hoodie or the fact that you have pink lipgloss on your lips” Nick said. Both brothers started laughing but quickly stopped when Chris said “Well at least I scan do this more often” pulling me in for a quick kiss. Both boys gave us a cheesy smile as they were happy that we were finally dating before we all drifted back off to sleep.

[vampire-superstar]

WELCOME BACK TO "I rate things because it's fun!"

Today we are rating full forms (?) Of characters but I have to be practical-ish

First off we have

Honestly, I can only say good things about him, this is by far my favorite design, however. I feel like they could've given him either a loincloth or harem pants, not both (I might be wrong and that's one piece) I still feel like it doesn't fit. It looks Arabian prince inspired (once more correct me if Im wrong), but the fur collar isn't add anything to the outfit. I feel like if they just accentuated his gold collar more it would have the same effect of fullness :]

Overall: 8.5/10

For some reason his png is huge so points off but even then, I want to draw attention to those sticks on his head. The bat bones? Kinda lacking. I feel like instead they should've just been tattered but other than that he's pretty cool. Tail might have to be fixed though

Overall: 9.5/10

First off when doing a quick glance compared to every other character, his demon form is the most traditional and simple. Because of this, I'm a little disappointed that the outfit didn't have much pop, you know? As the avatar of pride, you'd think you'd want his outfit to draw your eye but no ;( Instead of the flowy waistcoat maybe an actual peacock fan and more feather in his design. A problem you can't really fix but I feel like instead of to impress, he'd display the fan and open his wings to full size to look bigger and intimate

Overall: A disappointing 6/10

Much like Luci, his design looks more traditional and unlike him, his outfit makes up for it. However, my ONLY complaint is the orientation. It's good but not spread properly. All the detail seems to be drawn to the chest so maybe remove the jacket and do a full harness? Or do a full jacket with a harness peeking underneath. Also solid pants and combat boots to match

Overall: 9/10

For some reason all the pngs are different sizes idk how to fix it BUT not too many critiques on this. Just remove the jacket and go full turtleneck and suspenders. Or go full oversized hoodie. As usual, the pants are atrocious but they all are so no points off

Overall: Our first 10/10

A ten followed by an immediate -20. It's tacky and overpopulated like they added stuff and forgot they already had something there. It's atrocious and Asmo would never stand for this. The top should be without that collar (what's solomares obsession with non-practical ugly collars) and move the scorpion to his upper arm or turn it into a corset design. Scrap the quilt design and more evenly space the roses. Make the pant legs both black but add small chains and harnesses to get the same effect. Heels.

Overall: 🤢/10

This is atrocious for someone born from Luci. Putting aside my previous bias, it's an ok outfit. The top could slay but the pants drown it out. Bigass Gucci belt buckle also gots to go. Keep the boa because it's kinda cute. The tail looks like it pinches, no thanks. Keep that

Overall: 7/10

Not many complaints though it looks very similar to Mammon and Satan. Maybe not all three belts, just the one white one and the black one

Overall: 9.5/10

...

I'm speechless. All of it looks like another opportunity that was wasted. Buckles, no, he's highwatering those pants, I know his ankles ashy. Why are your pants spotted? Why is there a random horseshoe?? Also please just erase the other eye, it looks like a ghost eye. WHY ARE HIS SLEEVES CUT OUT.

OVERALL: -100/10

I don't have the room for the angels but I'm giving Simeon a 9/10 and Luke an 8/10 just because I feel like there's more they could've done for an angel form than just white clothes. Wings at least.

Overall the Design Score for demon forms is: 67% kinda average, not much past good. Still decent though. Levi, Dia and Tan carried. Next up, everyday outfits! But like next week

[mamamittens]

For my goofy self indulgent "Sir" au I've been considering what would, objectively, be the funniest way to reveal "Sir" is not, in fact, a sir at all.

Can't be a name reveal cause names can be weird.

I've had the TikTok meme about the corset song, you know uh... "--you bring the corsets~ we'll bring the cin-ches~ no one wants a waist over--nine inches~" where someone is tying either a corset or an apron and they tighten it on the measurement to show their silhouette. So that would be funny, just like, Nikia walking through one of the recipes from the hand me down book as she ties an oversized apron because they assumed she was bigger round the middle and everyone has a damn heart attack.

There's the casual "fuck me it's hot as balls out here" removal of the hoodie to tie it around the waist, maybe with a baggy shirt to help answer how the layers hide all that damn curve. Works wonders in real life btw if you don't wanna bind but want that illusion of a smaller chest. Really breaks up the more obvious boob shape.

Then there's a hug where someone (idk maybe Thatch but I'm a dweeb who thinks he's pretty so ya know) just throws their arms around her and is fucking shocked to discover there are tits there and not like Zoro's either.

Maybe one of them with an added bit of dialogue:

"why the hell are you calling me 'sir' anyhow?"

"It's not your name???"

"Who the hell names their daughter 'Sir'?!?"

"DAUGHTER?!?"

"EXCUSE ME, WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING?!? ISNT IT OBVIOUS IM NOT A DUDE?!? After all that work growing them as a teen??"

"NO?!?"

"WHA--oh shit, nevermind, this hoodie is fucking massive. right. My bad... WAIT DID THEY NOT KNOW EITHER?!? HOLD ON I GOTTA INTERROGATE SOMEONE!"

Cue additional rubbing because she's like, "Dude, everytime I get onto y'all I'm dead ass using a mom voice--how the hell did you think I was a man?!"

"None of us had moms..."

"...well now just I'm sad, c'mere you fucking walking tragedies, damn." *Gives consolation hugs* "...so was there any other assumptions, you know, while we're clearing the air?"

"... If you're not a man... Are you also not like, a teen?"

"No?!? I mean, this is a little less surprising, but no. I'm really not. I'm 27, dude."

Thatch sighing in relief because it felt weird to like someone younger than his youngest brother.

Bonus points if this is after quite sometime bunking in the men's area cause Nikia doesn't actually care so long as she has her own space to sleep. And this is very much not how Whitebeard prefers to have the sleeping quarters separated cause he's a tad old fashioned.

Idk, just silly things to consider while it's hot as balls IRL.

[sonsband]

I'm bored, how would you rate each ateez album (ep etc) out of 10

Jenjamin I don't think you realize how much fuckin music they put out and that they're all called the same thing

(going chronological)

Treasure One (All to Zero): 5/10, solid debut album, "Pirate King" is a great debut track, "Treasure" slaps, but they were babies finding their feet so I have to rank it lower

Treasure Two (Zero to One): 7/10, which is a surprise even to me. "Hala Hala" to "Say My Name" to "Desire"? hit after hit after hit. "Say My Name" is still my favorite title track of theirs. and I need a "Desire" with San doing the ad libs with his 2022 vocals, please please please.

Treasure Three (One to All): 5/10, I love "Utopia" and it started the Seonghwa Main Vocal When movement. he just DOES that. but I didn't love the title tracks, so a few points off that.

Treasure Fin: 7/10, this was my first comeback (I started listening with "Say My Name" but watched from a distance) and "Wonderland" smacked me across the face. and dearest belovedest Wooyoung on "Mist"... he didn't have to break our hearts like that.

Treasure Epilogue: 7/10, remember when I told you I liked this comeback and you said you'd listen because "they have some good singers" and then you made fun of me knowing Seonghwa's name? because I do. anyway "Horizon" is amazing and that one performance, you know the one, is still one of my favorites of theirs. also one of my favorite songs to play on violin cause it changes between bouncy and expansive.

Fever One: 9/10, maybe it's cause it came out when I was doing a lot of walking and so I could just put it on repeat. anyway "Inception" is my third most listened to song ever on Spotify if that tells you anything. Yunho Baby on "Fever" like oh that's my boy.

Fever Two: 12/10 fuck EVERYONE who was shitty to me right before it dropped, this album was for ME! dad had just gotten sick, my hours were cut, the creep at the hotel was apparently starting to say icky things about me, I was miserable, and then "I'm the One (Remix)" saved the day. sounds like the first day after Seroquel where nothing is real but GOD are you awake to feel it. Pink Gumby leapt with both feet into Hot Bitch Territory and began his ascent to one of my favorite vocalists of 4th gen and the pink was litcherally for me idk what to tell you he said sorry these people are so cruel. also "Take Me Home" is a queen I take no comments.

Into the A to Z: 7/10, I'm gonna be real, D and I were both completely thrown off that "Still Here" wasn't a Vertical Horizons cover. liked the Korean version better (you all know why) but this is the one on my liked songs playlist. anyway, the tracklist is mostly my faves so yeah nothing really to say.

Fever Three: 8/10, catiny's first comeback! and they DELIVERED for us! the "Deja Vu" outfits were amazing, especially the little Lake Geneva ones. I'm gonna see Seonghwa in a corset in my yellow wallpaper. and that night that we all went apeshit for Pinkhwa Ponytail will live on as a true heritage moment.

Fever Epilogue: 6/10, honestly I just go to the Kingdom recordings. The Real was a killer comeback that I wasn't expecting right at the end of the year there. the "Wave" Overture is so much better when they don't have to fight the choreographers, even if San doesn't get that scrape in the official recording. also if I play Mingi's rap in "Wonderland" on repeat then that's between me and God. (although we lived through the "Turbulence" performances to get to San's modulations. was it worth it? idk but I just want to squish my bestie's cheeks and tell him he's doing so amazing in his battle against augmented fourths)

The World Movement: 5/10, I was so excited when the intro to "Sector 1" was the spoiler from "Answer" but I think I hyped it up too much. I would have liked Guerilla a whole lot more if they weren't so liberal with the pitch correction. how are you gonna have the whole "break the wall!" screams and pitch correct the vocals here of all places. madness and insanity (but D and me calling the Metropolis references a year in advance? our brains are sooooo big). should have all been Mingi channeling RKL, but it's his world and we're just living in it. also the big chest voices in "The Ring" deserve more, please give us more of that.

[but +5 additional points for San being an anarchist slut, there is no type better. he said "Hi Lesbians" and then came back to say "Especially The Cool Ones" with his doofy little anarchist stomach graffiti]

[ami2kewl]

specifically! for @mugiimatsu who so kindly asked and any others who might be curious on my,,

mishima yuuki persona au

first things first, his persona is dolos, greek god of deception n trickery. since a persona is all about the how you present yourself when in the face of danger, i based this off of his rank 8 confidant event where he bluffed to that guy attacking akiyama. so since mishima isnt very strong physically, he relies on trickery. which is ALSO where I got the idea for the outfit. because you know where trickery and deception is most common? magician acts. which is why he has the whole trenchcoat corset (and non visible laced boots) combo going on. I almost added a top hat but it just wasnt working out. a loss..

anyway because of his arcana I gave him a color palette similar to the moon and its surroundings, dark blue (sky), yellow (moon), and white (stars).

and the mask. THE MASK. its not fully visible so heeere is the original sketch

anyway a whole bunch of thought went into this thing. not the fishnet part though I just thought that looked cool. as you can see though, there are 2 sides. one dark, one light. these sides individually represent the lies and truths. and in that same vein, the dark side and light side of the moon. it resembles jokers mask a bit for the eye part, just to show how his outlook on the world (and himself!) was changed thanks to him. at some point I started thinking the entire get up looked too similar to jokers but at least he doesn't have those atrocious leprechaun shoes. besides if he sees the phantom thieves as absolute justice then its make sense that his view of a rebel would align with jokers.

visible in other posts, for his neutral special he wields a ginormous hammer /ref. in my notes its said this is because:

"like birds when they puff out their feathers to be big and menacing. hes compensating with a humungous hammer."

and isnt that just so him.

anyway for the stat explanations ill be ripping it straight from said note.

" stamina is 40, magic 75, endurance 55, agility 71, luck 5. stamina should be higher from volleyball but idk... I cant really judge how good he actually was at volleyball since he was in a bit of a pickle at the time. dammit. we shoulda gotten a scene where a volleyball game takes place near the end of the game where the team gets to be happy without kamoshida. I woulda cried so hard.. anyway magic stat 75 since hes mastered 2 whole elements! endurance 55 I made it decent from past experiences... 🙁 agility 71 cause volleyball hello?? shit takes SPEED! luck at a depressing 5. because I checked tv tropes and he is apparently born unlucky. "

and finally, we are at weaknesses/strengths.

I actually struggled quite a bit at this part. originally was just goanna make his weakness ice cause im akeshima shipping trash but then I remembered loki isnt even an ice persona in p5... so I went back to metaphorical stuff. tried to see if dolos had a spouse, or an enemy. and he does, kinda. veritas, the goddess of truth. not specifically an enemy, but a direct opposite! however i associated the truth with light, and he already was null to light and dark, and changing that would kinda take away from the whole shabang. so I settled on a weakness to electricity based on zeus being an important figure in dolos's backstory. not completely random, but definitely not my most impactful choice.

and that my friends, is my

mishima yuuki persona au

explained! thank u for reading!!!

if i made a semilong text post detailing his persona/stats/weaknesses etc etc would anyone read it

[nxtsnw]

TOKYO REVENGERS BOYS

wearing a corset

n.a.: as always i need to cope,, idk why i thought about this, but it's just so funny🏃. Hope y'all like it ajahhs

♡ Hanma Shuji ♡

* ohh, he'll never admit he'd like to try a corset

* I think he'd only be able to wear one with a little help from Kisaki,

* one day you received a message from an unknown number, on which there was written something like: "Make Hanma wear a damn corset before I kill him, he's complaining too much."

* The sender texted that Hanma didn't stop talking to him about it ... and that in those days he was so persistent

* So as soon as you saw your boyfriend, you brought that topic up trying not to make it too obvious.

* "you know Hanma I have such a beautiful corset, but I don't think it fits me anymore, would you mind trying it? I would like to see how it looks to you"

* At first he said no, then when he saw him he added something like "well, listen, give it to me"

* It was light green AND IT LOOKED SO GOOD ON HIM

* Despite his astonished face, you could very well see the happiness in his eyes.

* You know that you'll never see that corset again in your closet</3 (but he wears it when he's with you;))

♡ Kokonoi Hajime ♡

* he often gave you many small gifts, and you decided it was time to reciprocate.

* you bought him such a beautiful black corset, it hadn't too complicated decorations

* you just knew that he would be divine on him

* no one knows, but he had already tried many corsets. He did it with those of Inui when his friend was not there-

* he had never found one that suited him

* as soon as he saw your gift he felt like a sting in his heart, the only thought that you had had to take something from him made him so happy <3

* he tried it right away, I SWEAR HE WAS SO BEAUTIFUL

* he would blush a lot at compliments but would reply with something like "yes I know I'm gorgeous", then give you a quick kiss on your cheek.

* he is the type who does not expect gifts, know that he will always remember that corset. He will wear it VERY often

* he would match us all kinds of clothes, and he would give you a matching one to get the matching corsets (please I'd die for this)

♡ Mitsuya Takashi ♡

* he loves corsets too (hcs: he wears them too), most of them he created them for you <3

* he knows everything about you by heart, all of your sizes and all of your preferences, he simply remembers it.

* he had a fairly plain white corset, to which he had added lace.

* it was lovely, simple but thanks to that little detail, that he had done, it was just more perfect <3

* his curiosity took over and he decided to try it. When he was done you went in his room-

*HE WAS GORGEOUS, and you were pretty much hypnotized looking at him for a long time, simply because he was pretty

* he blushed and when he was about to take it off, you said:

"Takashi, would you like to exchange our corsets from now on?"

* I swear that his heart skipped a few beats, but then he smiled softly at you and nodded<3

* yknow that you so very lucky to see this man in a corset every day

♡ Chifuyu Matsuno ♡

* it was born almost like as a joke, you often stole his sweatshirts or any type of dress because they were comfortable,,,

* so he too decided that he would get you something from your closet. He at first thought of a skirt (yes.) or a simple shirt.

* But then you noticed that he was staring at a corset that would match the color of his eyes wonderfully,

* you immediately gave it to him and sent him to the bathroom to change

* it took him at least 15 minutes to figure out how he wore it, but in the end, he came out of the bathroom wearing it correctly(he will never admit that he followed a tutorial a few minutes before-)

* he had a smile on his face, but before, he wanted your opinion:

"y/n what do you think? Did I wear it right?"

* and hell if he was fine, you stood staring at him and nodding without saying a word

* he blushed suddenly and was about to take it off when you stopped him and told him that he could keep it and that you wouldn't use it anyway

* at that moment he was so happy, you could hear his racing heartbeat after he hugged you-

♡ Baji Keisuke ♡

* it was born as a bet, whoever arrived first in class, not only had the last place but could also have asked the other for something that he couldn't refuse

* let's be serious, no one beats you when it comes to taking the right place in the class. So you won (he also arrived late for school that day,)

* After school he came to your house, and you've been thinking about getting him to wear that corset for a while.

* it was like that you got it just for him. Both the color and the pattern and even the size were perfect for him

* At first he refused. But then he remembered the bet and in fact, he could have done a lot worse for him, right?

* he stood for 10 minutes straight looking at it trying to figure out how to wear it.

"Do I have to undress? Do I have to wear it from underneath? How many laces does this thing have? And why are they all behind ?!" these were his comments

* he came out wearing it backward.

* and after laughing and making fun of him, you helped him

* HE WAS MORE THAN BEAUTIFUL (after wearing it in the right way)

* "yk y/n, even if I don't breathe much, I think this thing is perfect for me," he said as he admired himself in the mirror. (and yeah, he was so right)

[fuwushiguro]

@dabitdabi Welcome to playmate life gorgeous! Hawks is one of my favourites to write so thank you so much for sending him my way, I hope this is worth the wait!!

This is part of my Playboy Mansion event, feel free to participate!!

Hawks x f!reader

Genre: smut, (idk if this might be a bit fluffy too??)

Warnings: 18+, virginity loss, consensual sex, mentions of alcohol, oral (female receiving), fingering, mentions of cum, vaginal sex, unprotected sex.

Words: 3.5k

This wasn’t your first Playboy party, and you were sure it wouldn’t be your last. You’d been working as a bunny for around three months now, the first party was a little overwhelming, but the other girls were more than happy to hold your hand through the whole experience. The more parties you attended, the more comfortable you became. You never worried about guests being inappropriate, you weren’t just employees to your boss. You were bunnies, and you deserved to be treated with respect like everyone else attending the parties, you were the stars and made these extravagant events what they were.

You knew being a bunny came with the connotation of being hypersexualised, but becoming a bunny was too good of an opportunity to pass up. You weren’t one of the most popular bunnies since you were a little shy, but you were known by all of the guests who regularly attended these parties. You were often tagged in photos where you’d posed with guests. They’d always leave little comments that made you smile. You had the best job in the world.

Your first instance of trouble came at this particular party. You’d never experienced any guests acting unseemly, but this evening was different. You leaned over the bar to collect a tray of shots to walk around with, when you felt somebody tug on the tail attached to your corset. You ignored it at first, understanding that guests enjoyed playing with the bunnies. However when the assailant delivered a stinging spank to your ass cheek, your attention snapped in their direction. You recognised the man, he was a gruff looking entrepreneur who’s name you couldn’t place right now. It was apparent that he was drunk, you hoped it was just a little bit of teasing. He became a little more aggressive with you, begging you to kiss him and spend the night with him. There were no members of security nearby, but a few of your fellow bunnies did their best to help you get away from him, to no avail.

“Hey, get away from her.” You heard someone speak. You turned to face the soft voice, and struggled to see the man who had came to your defence through your bleary eyes. The drunk man tried to argue. Quickly you rubbed the droplets out of your vision so you could see who was helping you. Before the drunkard could state his case, your rescuer had grabbed him and pulled him towards a member of security to deal with. Some of your friends crowded you and coddled you, making sure you were okay after what happened. The blonde-haired hero came to check on you once he’d dealt with the situation. Before you could think, you rose to your feet with tears flowing from your eyes and ran to the nearest bathroom. You locked yourself in a stall while you broke down, feeling bad that your makeup would be ruined. You hoped that you wouldn’t get in too much trouble for taking the rest of the night off, but you’re sure that the other girls would defend you and explain the situation. You wouldn’t be surprised if the man who groped you got banned from attending these parties. There is a strict policy against any fornication at work, it was a fireable offence. But guests also had a one strike and you’re out rule, they mostly knew better than to try anything as brash as that man had, but he’d regret it now that he wouldn’t be invited to return ever again.

While you continued to cry, you heard the door squeak open, and footsteps approach your stall. You sniffed slightly, but mostly tried to calm yourself down. You couldn’t cry all evening after all, you didn’t want to give yourself a headache. You waited for the person to reveal themselves, assuming it was one of your friends. It would have been hard to tell who was who from the crack under the stall door. You were all in the same uniforms after all. But the shoes were nothing like your uniforms. It was a man, clearly, wearing a pair of bulky black boots and tan trousers.

“Um,” You sniffed, “Sir this is the ladies bathroom.” You alerted him, sure he already knew.

“Yeah, I know, I just wanted to check on you birdie.” He spoke back to you.

“I’m a bunny not a bird.” You corrected him, completely glossing over the pet name he’d decided to give you.

“Yeah I was just, never mind… You’re okay right? Can you come out here?” He queried. Obvious concern in his voice. You declined, you didn’t want him to see you like this. Your eyes were clouded with unshed tears. Your mascara had ran down your cheeks and you were sure your foundation underneath had probably ran too. But he wouldn’t take no for an answer, he asked you again… and again… and again…

“Fine.” You responded.

You flushed your crumpled up pieces of tear-stained toilet roll away and unlocked the door. His expression flickered from concern to sympathy as he saw how upset you were. You walked by him so that you could wash your hands, and you noticed in the mirror that he walked into the cubicle you’d just left. You weren’t sure what he was doing, but he returned to your side with several layers of toilet roll. When you washed and dried your hands, he ran the toilet roll under the tap. He cupped your face in one of his hands and lightly dabbed the damp tissue into your cheeks and under eyes. He was trying to help you; he was trying to tidy up your appearance. Why was he being so sweet?

“I think that just might make it worse.” You announced, knowing you were right.

“Okay then. Show me what I need to do.” He requested, “Please let me help you, I don’t want to see you upset like this over that scumbag.” He explained. Your heart clenched a little he was so caring and considerate; you could almost feel your heart melting. You took him by the hand and led him out of the bathrooms. You knew there were a lot of areas off limits and you’d risk losing your job, but you wanted to spend more time with your saviour and give him the chance to help you out again.

☆ ☆ ☆

You brought him to the bunny dressing room. You barged in with him assuming your co-workers wouldn’t be here, but one of them was sitting in a dressing chair topping up her makeup.

“You know you can’t bring people in here to hook up!” She reminded you.

“We aren’t here for that!” You protested, feeling extremely embarrassed. You felt the heat rise to your face and you tried to change the subject, “He just saved me from some trouble, please don’t tell anyone, he’s just checking on me.” You stated, hoping she’d take pity on you.

“Oh I don’t care, you know I won’t tell. I’m just about finished here so I’ll let you love birds do what you need to do.” She teased as she exited the glamorous pink dressing room.

You tried to protest once again before she left but it was too late. The honey-haired man smiled but decided not to join in the teasing. He simply requested that you show him what he needed to do to help you fix your makeup. But instead, you gave him your removal kit. You were done for the evening, there was no way you could go back to work when you felt the way you did. You both smiled and giggled sweetly as he did his best to remove your makeup for you. You chatted a little and got to know each other better, you found out his name was Keigo and he was a friend of the hosts. Once your makeup was off, you gave him a grateful, “thanks” and stood to your feet. The least you could do was escort him back downstairs before you turned in for the night.

“You know angel, you look just as cute without makeup as you do with.” He told you. You were stopped in your tracks as you couldn’t help but blush at the compliment. “Don’t you wanna hang out a little while before I have to leave?” He wondered, hoping you’d stick around. You knew that you shouldn’t, but you were too drawn to the handsome stranger that you couldn’t resist. You sat back down on the comfortable carpet with him and couldn’t help but coyly shy as he stared deeply into your eyes.

“Thanks again for saving me Keigo.” You repeated, you were so grateful for his help. You were sure that security would have helped you sooner or later, but you were truly fortunate that Keigo had been there to rescue you from his clutches.

“It really shook you up, didn’t it baby?” He sweetly questioned, “Have you never had to deal with something like that before?” He added. You shook your head.

“It was scary, obviously, but it wasn’t just that.” You expressed, not sure why you felt so comfortable sharing your personal life with this man.

“What do you mean?” He asked you, placing a hand on your leg. He stroked over your pantyhose with his thumb as he held onto you.

“Oh… I’m not sure I should say,” You started, “It’s a little embarrassing.” You followed. He didn’t speak, instead he just stared intensely into your sweet eyes, willing you to continue if you felt like it. You kept stuttering, starting and stopping your sentence as you tried to get the confidence to confide in him.

“Birdie, I promise I won’t judge you if you want to tell me.” He soothed, hoping to help you get your words out.

“It’s just… I’ve never…” You began. You screwed your eyes shut as you couldn’t bare to look at him when you finished your sentence, “I’m a virgin.” You blurted out. Your eyes were already closed but you felt so exposed you decided to cover your face with your hands too. You were so embarrassed; you were sitting with a guy who seemed too cool for school and probably had a wild sex life. You wouldn’t have been surprised if you opened your eyes and he was gone. But instead, you felt him grab your wrists and remove your hands from your face. Instinctively you opened your eyes, and right at that moment Keigo planted a delicate kiss onto your lips.

“I’m sorry if that was a little forward, I just wanted to show you it doesn’t bother me.” He smiled as he parted from your lips slightly. It was your first kiss, you weren’t upset. If anyone had to steal your first kiss, you weren’t mad about it being this beautiful stranger.

“Can we, um, do that again?” You asked, the words left your mouth and you instantly began to cringe. You hated how awkward you were, but he just had this effect on you. But before you could overthink your graceless comment, his lips were on yours once again.

You got lost in the feeling of his soft lips on yours. He tasted so heavenly; you couldn’t get enough. He got more adventurous and slipped a tongue into your mouth. You weren’t sure what to do so he did his best to guide you. Once you eased into it a little more, your kissing became more frenzied. You couldn’t get enough of each other. What started off soft and sweet became hot and passionate, but you knew you had to hold back. You couldn’t risk getting caught with him or you’d risk losing your job. He lightly groped your breast as his kissing traversed from your lips down to your neck. You couldn’t stop the moan that huffed from your lips, and you bucked against his thigh trying to gain some friction against your clothed cunt.

“You look fucking hot in that outfit.” He mumbled between kisses.

“Stop!” You raised your voice as you pushed yourself away from him.

“Did I do something wrong?” He wondered, confused by your sudden outburst.

“No, you’re great I’m sorry. It’s against the rules for Playmates to hook up with guests, I will lose my job if we’re caught.” You explained. Keigo nodded as if he understood, giving you an innocent smile as he planted a kiss on your lips once more.

“I get it. Sorry I got carried away.” He told you, picking himself off the ground. He held a hand out to you to help you to your feet, “I think I’ll get going. I’ll see you at the next party though, right?” He explained. You didn’t want to see him at the next party. You didn’t want him to leave. But you didn’t want to risk losing your job for the sake of keeping Keigo around. And you really didn’t want to throw your virginity at him just to prevent him from leaving.

“I, um…”

“I’ll have no reason to come to these things anymore if I don’t get to hang out with the prettiest bunny in the whole mansion.” He smiled, lightly brushing his thumb over your cheek.

You weren’t usually one for compliments. You knew guys would say anything to get in your pants. But there was something so sincere about Keigo. The way everything seemed so genuinely sweet and affectionate when he spoke to you. The way he made you feel like you were the only other person in the whole world with him. You loved being a bunny. You loved living with the girls and you loved all of the fun you had at the mansion. But you were in a role in which you were hypersexualised to everyone around you. How could they expect guests to not want to fuck you? How could you be expected to resist someone as sexy as Keigo? You didn’t think you’d lose your virginity like this, but who were you saving it for anyway?

☆ ☆ ☆

You pressed your lips against Keigo’s once again, and he was more than happy to respond. You began tugging at his clothes, indicating that you wanted them off. You didn’t break your kissing for more than a second. He took his jacket off while still deeply kissing you but removed himself quickly whilst he took off his t-shirt. You didn’t break the kiss either while you removed your high heels. You shrunk a few inches but Keigo didn’t mind leaning down a little further to keep smothering you in affection. He began to travel down to your neck once again but settled on the flesh of your breasts that were being hoisted up by your corset. You let out soft sighs as he continued. He crouched down slightly as he began fondling the bottom of your corset that resided between your thighs. He managed to unbutton it as he pulled down your sheer tights and panties. You were about to remove your corset when he asked you not to.

“You look too fucking good in that outfit to take it off.” He alerted you.

You felt slightly embarrassed by the praise, but it didn’t last long when he pulled you down to kiss him again, you were looming over him a little as you did. “Lie down.” He commanded. You did as you were told, eagerly awaiting whatever he had planned. He parted your legs a little, he repeatedly kissed your leg as he travelled up towards your pussy. He spread your legs wider when he reached your sopping sex, and instantly got to work licking your clit. You moaned almost instantly at the contact as your body softened into his touch. He slowly plunged a finger in, carefully working your innocent interior.

“Tell me if it hurts or if you want me to stop, okay birdie?” He instructed.

“Y-yeah…” You moaned. You’d be crazy to want this feeling to end.

He latched back onto your clit. His licking started off slow, but he eventually picked up the pace. He alternated between licking and sucking at your sensitive bundle of nerves all while still pumping his digit in and out of your tight cunt. The euphoric feeling caused you to writhe around on the ground. You were compelled to close your legs and clamp them around your lovers head, but he used his free hand to pin one of your legs to the ground while he continued working at your desperate cunt. He slipped another finger inside of you and continued his motions. He frantically began scissoring you open so he could prepare you for his cock. The sensations were too much, you hadn’t felt like this before. You felt a rising knot in your stomach and you were sure it was going to unfurl at any moment.

“P-please, Keigo I… I think I’m gonna.” You panted, your chest rising and falling at a rapid pace.

“No.” He spoke. Halting all actions. You were crushed. Why did he stop? You whimpered at the loss of contact and Keigo admired your little virgin hole clenching around nothing. You sat up a little, wondering what was going on. “Lie back down for me angel.” He commanded. You did as you were told, anticipating what he was doing. You knew instantly when you heard the unzipping of his pants. He was going to fuck you.

“Keigo… N-need it. Need it s’bad.” You whined. Your bratty voice earned a smirk from Keigo.

“Yeah? My mouth and fingers made you a little needy huh? I wanted to feel you cum around my cock.” He told you as he made contact with your dripping pussy. The feeling of him sliding his cock up and down your slit alone was heavenly. You were desperate for him to fill out your hole.

“Please, please fuck me now.” You requested.

He lined himself up with your entrance. He slowly sunk himself into you, making continuous eye contact with you as he did so. He was paying attention to every facial expression you made, he didn’t want to hurt you. He was impressed that you took him like champ, he completely bottomed out inside of you and he was more than ready to fuck your brains out.

He set a harsh pace almost instantly, he was aching with such a desperate need to cum. As soon as he saw you he knew that he had to have you tonight. He could see there was something untouched and innocent about you, but he didn’t expect you to be a fully fledged virgin. You were his now. No matter what you’d remember him as your first sexual encounter and no one would ever be able to compare.

He continued drilling into you, thoughts of owning you bringing him closer to his climax. Your arousal was rebuilding too. He began kissing you once again, although it was hard for each of you to focus. The building pleasure in the pair of you caused you both to occasionally moan into each other’s mouths. The sounds being devoured by each other arousing you more, bringing you closer and closer to your highs. He bent both of your legs up to your chest so he could continue pounding you at a deeper angle.

“K-Keigo,” You whimpered, “It hurts.” You expressed, not used to the feeling of him nudging your cervix.

“I’m sorry birdie, I’ll make it better I promise, I just-“ He stopped as he moaned through his speech. Making no attempt to change what he was doing to alleviate the pain you were feeling, “Cum for me baby you’ll feel better, I wanna feel you cum around me.” He huffed into your face. He reached down and began toying with your clit as he encouraged you to let yourself go. The contact was more than enough to send you over the edge. You were forced to keep constant eye contact with Keigo as he fucked you through your release. Your cunt clamped down on him, milking his cock for all it was worth. He rested his forehead on yours as you both came together, looking lovingly into each other’s eyes.

You’d always heard mixed reviews about losing your virginity. You would either hear that it was a beautiful and romantic moment you should give to someone meaningful, or that it’s a terrible time and it has no meaning on your life. You didn’t know Keigo very well at all, but you felt grateful that he was the one you got to share your first time with. For someone who was a stranger, he truly did care about your enjoyment and keeping you safe. He was still between your legs, letting you warm his cock as he laid on top of you. He gently peppered kisses on your forehead and cheeks while stroking your hair.

You were lucky you hadn’t been caught, you were lucky that for now you still had a job. But if he comes back to the next mansion party, you knew that you wanted to do this with him again.

© 2021 dabistiktokdance

Thank you so much again for participating, it was a pleasure to write this and have you be a bunny for the night! I hope you enjoyed your experience at the party!! 

[stickynotestoletters]

Yandere BNHA Boys pt 2

Okay, this is a continuation of the first yandere ones I did because I wrote that in basically a night and was too tired to do more, I'm probably gonna post some after for the pro heroes and villains if I have time, I might finish those on the weekend then post it.

This is just a bunch of headcanons I have about the boys in BNHA and what they’d be like as yanderes. Only the really fluffy or good things about them listed here. Neither of these works are a good depictions of a real yandere and make sure to be careful to identify yandere traits in real people around you. It’s a very dangerous world and stay safe!

sorry if you were waiting for me to come out with these and I literally took forever lol, link to the first one is here. It's basically just me comforting myself with the sweet things that I think they would do as yanderes.

Warnings: Brainwashing, blood, gore, death, trans headcanons, body dysmorphia, nonbinary they/he Sero, they/them pronouns + nonbinary headcanons for Tokoyami, he/they nonbinary headcanons with Shinsou, a little NSFW because if I don't specify then they are aged up (around 20-25 is where I imagine the timeline that they actually captured you and have a hero carrier going for them already), manipulation, regular yandere things, kinda just turns into dumbass horknee headcanons at some point after Shinsou (sorry lmfao), objectification

Sero Hanata

so basically the first time they saw you they immediately wanted to come up to you

they love to give you back hugs because once you stop trying to fight them he's gonna be so honored you finally trust him

Big time slut [non-derogetory] for you

Likes to have an apartment that's high up, probably a secured penthouse with lots of windows

If you're afraid of heights they will get a ground bed for you two, they would also vibe with a low hanging hammock if you allow it

they really really like just putting you on a custom made leash, not inherently in a sexual way just in general likes to have it look like that with their tape on you at all times

they really really like it when you come to them for hugs and comfort

If you're a trans reader, if you want a binder he will get you one as soon as you ask, cried when you told him about it.

they cried way more than you though...

Was very accepting as an nb person as well

they custom made you a tape binder of his

Kinda as a joke but high key felt like they were gonna combust at the thought of you wearing that for them

Takes you to pride but you cannot speak

only takes you to pride after they are 1000% sure that you're not gonna speak to anyone but them

Takes you to it as a part of their float because they'd been invited onto the Hero Float

You are in a costume that's exactly like his, helmet and everything, you aren't allowed to be looked at

After that though, it's gonna be your choice to go or not to go

they trust you a little more after you run away from some assholes though and after that sometimes lets you take your helmet off during pride, you have to give them a lot of kisses though

When/if you ever consider any type of surgery he is 110% on board

they demand that you have to have it performed by someone who has done this a million times before, trusts no one else

If there's a way for you to go through it without the surgery they're excited but he's more excited if there is surgery because they love the idea of you being so cuddly and clinging to them for their comfort

Tokoyami Fumikage

haha they're in love with you

like, intensely in love with you the moment they first meet you

Dark shadow thinks you're adorable but says nothing more about their obsession with you

when you met them before UA they absolutely cannot handle being around you in a 10-foot radius

Eventually, though they do try and become a friend of yours

After that, it's a hop on the manipulation train, my dude

they basically make you see them as your savior from a mean uncaring world

they love talking to you about things that make you happy and loving you in little ways

hugs, hand holding, a lot of time it's just a little peck (haha) on the cheek

they love living with you though, like really love it

they like baking and making dinner for you

but especially baking

like really, baking

the manipulation they use makes it seem like everything is okay when you only talk to them so that's what you do and to you, it seems so much better than anything you could do

they haven't come out to you by the time you come out to them so your trans journey really helps them figure things like that out as well

The first time you explain that gender is a made-up construct they're like "yeah......isn't that how everyone feels? Like, not a gender????" we love this for them

you both kind of heal each other through this process

they like seeing you when you're most comfortable so they get you as many binders as you need

also gets you a custom binder like Sero but with feather designs, not like stupid printable patterns but something that is soft and the softness isn't feathers it's regular fluffy cloth

idk I'm not a designer that's why I gave up and became a writer lmao

they also get you a compression corset because they're emo

if there is surgery it takes a lot of time to convince them

they don't ever want you to regret anything they helped you with so it takes a lot of long-winded conversations about it

there was a lot of nervousness on their part because (this is just my headcanon) they were almost convinced to get surgery to construct their face to look human-like

they had a lot of their family tell them that, because of the way they looked, they had less of a chance to become a hero, they were immensely traumatized by this and thus wants to make absolutely sure you were okay with this

but when they finally find themself comforted by you about it it happens quickly and in the safest way you could possibly imagine

Shinso Hitoshi

Shinsou didn't want to approach you at all, he was so scared you'd run away or tell him he's a villain

they always thought that they weren't good enough for you

he loved you but you needed to say hi first

and you did

so he whisked you away

they like to just brainwash you into tasting certain types of food when you're craving them instead of just getting you food

he likes to talk to you in a voice like he would talk to a kitten, not like husky or anything sexy, but something cute and adorable

especially when you're brainwashed and can't say anything to him

He likes to give you lots of soft stuff like I'm talking pillows upon pillows and squishmallows

once he gets his own house they get it in a place that's more comforting in the dark than in the light

they really like the dark and outdoorsy vibe anyway so if they choose a place somewhere in the forest to keep you what's the added bonus if no one can hear you scream?

a little bit of spice; he has this whole a/b/o fantasy (idk it's his vibes that he'd read that fanfic and stuff lmao) and kinda treats you like you were an omega

sometimes if you guys do have sex they'll brainwash you to act like an omega or once he's more experienced with bodily manipulation involving their quirk they'll make you do all of the......omega things

when you come out to them, if you're trans, they're definitely gonna not care

like if you need comfort and stuff about it they will not make a big deal about it

he legit is like "okay .....can I still fuck you or?????"

HE JUST GIVES OFF REALLY HORKNEE VIBES OKAY?????

definitely brainwashes you into not feeling dysphoric anymore though

like loves it when you come up all sad to him and uncomfy just to ask them to brainwash you

he melts over you cuddling them after those times though

if you want surgery they're gonna make sure that it's between him and the doctors that y'all are there

like no one knows you're there, completely off radius, in and out like nothing (he's basically a cryptid in the woods by the time you guys have the surgery, so they wanna make sure no one questions it)

Monoma Neito

bold of you to assume that man can express literally anything when he wants to just sit you on his lap and look at your pretty face

love at first sight taken literally but not in a shallow way

he loves just having you around him

kinda treats you as an accessory at times, talks like you're a purse or something and people don't really comment but it's really freaking them out sometimes when you don't speak up on it

likes to say he's the only one to understand you cause he's afraid you'd leave him

a hardcore fan of collars though

definitely has lots of jewelry that represents him even though you don't go out he still loves the idea of it

big time cook

loves providing for you, never lets you do a damn thing other than watching pre-approved cartoons and hobbies

absolute fucking disaster about hugging you

always has to be touching you

he thinks you're so fucking gorgeous and body worships you even out of the bedroom

if you're trans he will definitely be weird about it at first

he's just diet transphobic

he's not denying it but sometimes he's like "Are you sure???" and stuff

he clears this up with the help of you being pissed enough to not eat or talk to him until he apologizes

he then educates himself on it and comes to the conclusion that he was in fact being an asshole

talks to you about binders and stuff like that

doesn't really believe in surgery, he would never allow you to do that just because it would be too painful for him to see you go through

he instead literally searches the whole fucking globe for a person with a body-altering quirk to make sure you don't get hurt

he seeks out homophobes, transphobes, and other dumbasses on the regular just to kill them like literally it just started out for your approval but now it's just for fun

Anyway, the villain one (if I do it) will probably become just horknee brain rot cause I am a slut. Request some stuff and I'll try to put up some works if y'all want ig.

[falsegoodnight]

this is part two of my december fic rec! this list encompasses the fics i’ve read from the 18th to the 28th!! it’s also my birthday today which makes it even more special! i can think of no better way to spend today than spreading positivity! :)

you can find part one of this month here

✰ there’s happiness because of you by @hadestyles | NR | 1k - (so soft, tender, and beautiful!! rori’s writing amazes me always! and this was written for my birthday because they’re an angel <3)

Thursday mornings have always been their favourite.

✰ and it gets colder and colder by @hadestyles | E | 2K - (another rori fic!! once again, beautiful prose! made me feel emotional!)

Harry wants to take care of Louis. Things take a turn.

✰ make my wish come true by @soldouthaz | M | 3k - (drabble from this series) (so cute, lovely, soft, amazing!!! made my heart so happy! this is also dedicated to me which :’) sarah angel chant)

The taste of Christmas cookies fresh out of the oven and peppermint hot chocolate is still heavy on his tongue. Harry’s sweater provides some warmth and it still smells of him from before he left for his internship two weeks ago, but it’s nowhere near the feeling of his arms wrapped around him. Louis shivers despite the blankets.

✰ spirit meets the bones by @hadestyles​ | E | 3k - (i had to edit to add this because rori wrote another beautiful little fic for me :’) beautiful prose, beautiful emotions, so so so beautiful, gosh. pure poetry!)

The action shouldn’t fill his eyes with tears but it does. These small gestures mean the world to him. A steady reminder that Harry does notice all the tiny, seemingly insignificant details that make Louis him.

✰ 29 Blows by @quelquesetoiles | E | 4k - (super hot but also so cute!! love the concept of the birthday tradition in this one!!!)

For over a decade now, Harry has had his little tradition. It wouldn't be a Louis Tomlinson birthday without his best friend finding new, ingenious ways to make his life more difficult.

It's cute, it's funny, it's theirs, until Harry takes it a step too far on Louis' 29th birthday.

✰ calm me down (before i sleep) by @erodiansunflower | E | 7k - (a pwp and super hot, but also super cute??)

Prompt 24: Harry is a sex shop owner that has a crush on Louis, the shy customer who flirts with him while buying cute buttplugs, lace panties, and collars. One day, Louis asked Harry to help him put on a corset (they end up fucking in the dressing room). Things escalate quickly from there, so they start seeing each other seriously while trying other sex stuff.

✰ You’re Never Alone With a Moon This Bright by @helloamhere | T | 8k - (part one of this series) (WOW this was incredible and i am ENTRANCED! this author is an all-time favorite and idk why it took me so long to get to this series but i’m here now!! and loving it!!)

Louis was a monster. But sometimes, even monsters get a Christmas.

✰ Be a Good Girl For Me by @sincetheywere16and18 | E | 9k - (really hot and cute!!!)

Based on this prompt: “AU where Harry is Louis’ older brother’s best friend. He catches Louis dancing around his room in panties and blackmails him, saying that louis has to do anything he says or else he’ll tell Louis’ family that he wears girly underwear. Secretly soft for him, Harry gives him easy tasks and uses the whole thing to spend more time with Louis. Eventually, the orders begin to escalate and Harry teases Lou about his secret, making Louis shy and embarrassed. Louis loves the attention though, and forms a crush on his brother’s best friend. Lots of feminization, secret relationship, and enemies to lovers. Thank you!”

✰ it’s hard to fight naked by @loustarlight | E | 11k - (LOVED this so much!!! a big fan of enemies/flatmates to lovers especially when there’s a walk-in involved!!)

Louis leaves dirty socks on the couch, Zayn does assignments while he's high, and Harry is hopelessly crushing on his roommate.

✰ Sweet Scary Creatures by @specklelouis | M | 13k - (jurassic park au!! so cute and fun!!! loved louis’ character growth in this in particular!)

They stare into each other's eyes for a while until Louis remembers this is too intimate and looks at Harry’s hands on his thigh. It spans a big portion of his thigh and Louis has always been insecure about how thick he is, so he loves that Harry has huge, dustbin hands that hold him and makes him feel smaller, safer.

✰ hereafter (ad infinitum) by @larryent | M | 13k - (this was absolutely beautiful!! the writing was incredible, the contrast between the old timeline and new one impeccable, and the letters!!! love them!! and vampire harry is always a win!)

"A legacy is every life you’ve touched. And you’ve touched mine twice."

On the coast of San Francisco in 2024 is when Harry falls in love all over again.

✰ Believe Me When I Say You Have It All by @helloamhere | T | 20k - (part two of this series) (loved this even more than it’s predecessor. not to be dramatic, but i’d die for the louis and harry in this series. this whole world has my heart)

Harry had never faced anything in this forest that had actually succeeded in scaring him. Louis was no exception.

✰ Yours to Lose by @loulicate-recs | M | 26k - (so cute and soft and sweet!!! louis and harry were both angels and IAN <3 little cutie!!! so proud of you hanis!)

Louis always gets distracted with his mummy duty and he eventually catches Harry's attention.

✰ But It’s Useless by @thinlinez | E | 26k - (this put such a big smile on my face!! so cute and lovely!! louis was a relatable and adorable menace and harry was a smitten idiot but they both got there in the end!!)

Omega Louis would never guess that he would be trying to hack into Alpha Harry's Wifi. That is until everything changes when he tries to get to know his enemy.

✰ Stuck On You by Writewhatiwant | E | 34k - (so so sweet! loved the aspect of stickers in this fic and how louis found joy in them!! really loved how both louis and harry (especially harry) grew throughout this story and how they found peace at the end!)

Louis’ life revolves around his stickers. Harry’s life revolves around his job. The universe has decided their worlds should revolve around each other.

✰ smoke between your teeth by @soldouthaz | E | 37k - (i think everyone knows how much i adore sarah and her fics but this one just might be a new favorite! loved all the psych stuff, the pining, the rom-com worthy confession <3 brilliant!)

Louis tries to stop his addiction to cigarettes and discovers he's been addicted to Harry for much, much longer.

✰ Your Life Worth Walking on a Bright Morning by @helloamhere | T | 38k - (part three of this series) (it just keeps getting better and better <3 so comforting and consistent and beautiful!)

For all its complexity, Louis sometimes reminded himself, life could always be simplified into a series of forks in the road. Even overwhelmingly big things were survivable when you broke them down to their choice. One path or the other, left or right.

✰ On The Edge by @zanniscaramouche | E | 47k - (so crazy good!! zanni is always amazing me!! loved the ice skating, the hockey, the misunderstandings, the multi-faced and beautiful characters and relationships - all so perfect!)

Figure skating is as vital to Louis’ identity as his DNA, so when his skates go missing right before the last Olympics of his career there may be a meltdown only vanilla bath salts can fix. Well, that and the stupidly charming hockey player he met on the plane.

Harry’s too old to be the wonder kid and too young to be taken seriously in the NHL. As an alternate thrown in at the last second, he fights to prove himself on the national team at the largest sporting event known to man. Or he will, once he gets off this flight and can focus on something other than the fussy figure skater and his stunningly blue eyes.

A baggage mix-up skews both of their perfectly laid plans for gold, forcing the two to work together as the clock clicks towards the minute they’re expected to shine on centre ice.

✰ made for lovin’ you by @cuddlerlouis | E | 53k - (loved this so much!! touch depri/accidental bonds are my favorite and this was no exception!!! the characterizations, the tension, the misunderstandings, the tenderness, the fluff!!! so good!)

A quick, horny decision ruins Louis’ summer plans, but may also lead to unexpected discoveries. Featuring the road trip of dreams, misunderstandings, and a bit of fate.

✰ social cues by @outropeace | E | 56k - (so fucking good!! the slow burn in this was impeccable!!! pair it with friends with benefits, mutual pining, angst, misunderstandings... amazing <3)

To Harry, Louis was becoming as tangible and essential as music in his life. He still was a mystery but at the same time, he was one of the most real things Harry had. He just hoped he could live up to the image Louis probably had in his mind of him.

He could play the part, after all, what was published of him wasn’t as detached from reality. He didn’t think of himself as a rockstar cliche, although he couldn't deny he did sleep around, partied a lot, and did some drugs. But then again, wasn’t that what the majority of his friends back in his hometown were doing at college?

Harry wanted to impress Louis, he didn’t want to disappoint or leave his expectations unfulfilled, so he’d give him the full rockstar experience.

It was a very simple plan, what could possibly go wrong?

✰ dripping like spider milk by @raspberryoatss | E | 64k - (pip amazing me with her talent? a common occurrence. this was so wonderfully written and so well done!! loved the characterizations, the dynamic, the angst, the miscommunication, the pining, the HUMOR!!! it was all so amazing!!)

When he sees the alpha, his brown hair curling around the top of his neck and his broad back that’s filled out over the past couple of years, Louis freezes for a moment. The alpha turns around, Louis’ surprised expression mirrored on his own for a fraction of a second before he schools it into a big, yet shy grin and a wave of his huge hand. With his nostrils flared, Louis knows that he can smell him, too.

They never hired alphas, except for—

“Harry.”

✰ a taste of freedom and sweetened passion by @tomlinvelvetfics | M | 74k - (okay technically haven’t finished reading this one yet but i want to get this up early and i already know this is amazing because it’s LATE and she’s incredible!!! and, i mean, anne of green gables?? abo?? best birthday gift ever!! will be spending the day reading this in bliss <3)

“Are you mad?” he explodes, throwing his hands up, groaning. “I was so, so close to reaching my goal, and your stupid, stalking ass had to creep up on me, hm?”

Harry is trying to keep his laughter in, walking closer to him, eyes soft. He doesn’t like the way those eyes make him feel, an odd, dangerous mix of nervous and flustered, so he bends down to pick up the books, raising an eyebrow when Harry growls in protest.

“I wanted to pick them up for you,” the alpha pouts, and Louis glares at him, getting into position and lowering the pile of yellowed pages over the top of his head.

“I’m a functional human being, thank you very much,” he grits out as he begins to walk and mentally count the amount of steps he takes. One, two, three, for heaven’s sake Harry fuck off!, four, five. He doesn’t let himself be distracted as the alpha walks along with him despite the slow pace, green eyes focused on him in a way that would, in any other cases, compelled him to throw a book in the alpha’s face.

He doesn’t know why he doesn’t do it and certainly doesn’t want to think about the reason, whatever it might be.

If you read any of these lovely fics, remember to leave kudos and comment to show your appreciation!

*if i made any errors, please let me know :)

enjoy!

[koukouture]

Rating Genshin Impact designs pt.2!

(part 1) 

Welcome back whales, f2ps, and everyone in between! Since the first part was pretty well received, I’ve decided to continue this series! 

Once again, I am not a professional artist of character designer, I am just doing this for fun since Genshin has a lot of good and bad designs

Aether

I LOVE HIM!!! I LOVE HIM SO MUCH!!!! LOOK AT THE SILHOUETTE! THE DETAILS! THE COLOUR SCHEME! 

Aether’s design is a fucking GODSEND from those shitty basic male MC looks. Ya know, the ones with dark basic anime boy hair and an outfit that’s about as imaginative as an unborn fetus. 

The use and placement of colours is so nice and I love the details all over him. He looks like your typical kind and princely character, which is honestly how I imagine his personality. Also idk why but I love the fact he’s wearing a crop top, it’s just so refreshing to see an MC that isn’t in a regular outfit or a full suit of armor with a shitty silhouette.

He looks sleek and leaving him in mainly black and other neutral tones ensures that he’ll look good with any element in his lights, gold also works with a lot of colours very well, so nothing ever looks awkward on him. 

I also love where they put the lights, it just works really well. Hell, even without lights he looks awesome, I could see Aether’s design without any of the elements lighting him up like a lightsaber. 

Also, it looks pretty comfortable for traveling, boots, gloves, and he’s gonna be walking and fighting a lot so a crop top is a good choice. The pants are a bit more loose for easier movement and he doesn’t wear too much armour that could restrict him. Love it. 

Overall, I love this design so much, I wish my colour placement was that good, bruh he looks like the friggin sun I love his design so much ;-;

Lumine

Ok so, I like this dress, and I like the design. It’s not my favourite, but Lumine is really cute and looks super dainty and doll like, but it just doesn’t speak as loud as Aether’s design. Idk I feel like it’s lacking something. I do love her hair though, it’s a super cute hairstyle and is leagues different from other generic blonde anime girls. 

The main gripe i have with this is that i don’t think a WHITE dress with a corset is a good outfit for traveling. There’s also just a lot of weird detail on the dress? Like there’s this weird part in the middle of the skirt where it looks like there’s metal? Just attached to the fabric? 

She doesn’t look like a traveler, she looks like a princess, and I guess that fits given that Aether is the one used in most promotional material, but I think this dress is more something she would wear when she joins the Abyss. 

Lumine seems so cool and threatening as a villain, I think her outfit really reflects that, like I said, she looks like a princess and the cool whites and blues really help with that. 

Overall.... I just don’t know. I don’t like it, it’s really easy to recognize but it’s just not as good as Aether’s. Sorry Lumine 

Mona

Ok, ok, ok, I LOVE MONA!!! Her colour scheme is so nice and not only is her design pretty, it tells you a lot about her. There are stars all over her, she’s an astrologist, her outfit is very intricate and it suggests a cocky personality, which is pretty true. 

The outfit looks so expensive though??? Like Mona how did you afford this? But it sells the mage vibe so well and aaaahhhh she’s just so pretty! 

Not a lot to say, she’s just pretty :3

Xingqiu 

I really like the top part and the shoes, my only gripe is the shorts. They look so out of place?? They look like workout shorts and just don’t flow with how elegant the rest of the design is. I feel like adding more detail to the shorts or just sticking with the “young noblemen from the 1800s” vibe and making them longer (and maybe pleated?) would seel the look a lot better. Don’t get me wrong Xingqiu, you work booty shorts better than me, but booty shorts that look like “athletic gear” from Walmart? On a young noblemen/martial arts prodigy? Yeah no, it doesn’t pass the vibe check. 

On the other hand, his shoes and shirt (and tailcoats) really sell his whole rich vibe better. I love how it sort of combines elements of Victorian London and traditional Chinese clothing, it works so well. I just wish I could come of with something as creative. 

I see a lot of people dunking on his haircut but I like it personally, it’s very recognizable. The fact that the right is really short and flat just kind of pisses me off? Idk maybe that’s just me. 

Overall a very good, well thought, and creative design. 

Chongyun

Ok, next to me loving Chongyun so much, I just- look at his design. There is so much to unpack and I love all of it. 

It combines modern day fashion with traditional Chinese clothing and it just does it in such a natural way and looks so fucking good??? Like the hoodie over the qipao? The baggy pants and the shoes that allude to him as a martial artist? Immaculate. 

Cryo characters all have such nice designs, Miyoho really does play favourites. Like there is not a single cyro character with a bad design, all of them are 1) recognizable and 2) very very very very pretty 

(Also random thought but Chongyun reminds me of a k-pop idol? Like his haircut and the drip? Idk but peak k-pop energy)

His colour scheme is on point because why wouldn’t it be? You can tell that he’s sort of cold and that he definitely has ice powers, the placement is also just really smart. Chongyun has like four colours on him (gold, navy, light blue, white) and yet it’s just arranged in such a way where it’s so easy to recognize and sets him apart from all of the other blue and white characters with ice powers. 

I remember I saw a video titled “why you should play Genshin Impact” after I had finished BOTW, and I saw Chongyun’s design and being like ‘Oh wow, he looks pretty cool’ 

I love Chongyun so much and his design is a big contributor to that, and that’s all I have to say. 

Geo Daddy Zhongli 

BARK BARK BARK BARK GRRRRR AWOOOOOOGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAA-

Ok Zhongli is really hot. Like really, really, really, FUCKING hot. Like “he simultaneously raised and lowered my standards for the male gender” hot. How did he lower them? Bruh his spending habits, it makes him so endearing and cute I just- *dies*

(Zhongli I have Mora, you don’t need Childe I can be your sugar mommy-) 

Ok so let me start with his colour palette because awooga that shit is hot. Black and brown wasn’t a colour palette I expected to love so much but here we are. He definitely looks like he has earth powers, and it’s so nice. I have never seen any character who have brown in their colour palette, even if they do, it’s just their hair. 

And the fact that he’s wearing an elegant suit and yet has pauldrons? I love it so much. It speaks to him as a gentleman and a warrior, which is literally his entire personality and I love it so much. 

Once again we have a character who combines Victorian London vibes with traditional vibes and it is amazing. Like the tassels and the dragon motifs? The long ass tailcoats that aren’t practical for fighting but GOD are they hot? Yes. Yes to all of it. I just wanna tug on his lil tie and smooch him. 

I love how they just added yellow on the inside of his tailcoats, it’s really nice and helps break up the dark colours of his outfit I love Zhongli so much he is my comfort character and everything I don’t deserve :’)

[loverboystyles]

Twisted Attraction

Pairing: Loki × Reader

Summary: Y/N and Loki have been enemies for as long as anyone can remember, but when Y/N’s parents host a special dance to find a suitor for them, they unexpectedly finds feelings for the younger Prince of Asgard

A/N: hii! so i havent posted anything in a good few months but hopefully this makes up for it? idk, but I hope you like it. also, i imagined this dress for Y/N. also, i tried to make it as gender neutral as possible, so you can change the dress into a suit or jumpsuit or whatever you’d like!

Warnings: Maybe some typos, and fluffy Loki?

Word count: 2.5k

"Do you think he'll be coming to the dance tonight?" your maid asked, waiting for you to finish changing behind your folding privacy screen. 

"Oh," you pondered for a moment, your mind trailing away for a moment to picture him. 

The person you were thinking of was Loki, Prince of Asgard. Sometimes better known as Thor's adopted younger brother, or even the son of Laufey, the former leader of the frost giants. Although you hadn't seen him in years, his image was still engraved in your mind. 

His pale skin. His long, black hair. His soft, blue eyes. The stupid, sly smirk he always had on his face. You hated him. Yes, hate may be a strong word, but you meant it with every fiber of your being. 

You don't exactly remember when the rivalry started between you and Loki, but everytime you two were in the same room, it was like you were reliving a war in your minds. Always giving each other death glares, always exchanging petty insults, always bickering about something, always imagining what you would do to the other if you ever got the chance. 

The pet names always infuriated you the most, though you couldn't tell why. Perhaps it was that he always used them in compliments? Most of them were backhanded, but still, they were compliments nonetheless. 

"Keep your head up darling, you wouldn't want anyone thinking you're shorter than you already are, do you?" 

"Tsk, tsk, tsk. Look at your dainty little hands. Thank God you're a princess love, or else you wouldn't be able to do anything." 

"Oh, what a shame. No wonder your parents haven't been able to find a suitor for you! No one wants to marry a sassy little girl with a plethora of attitudes, sweetheart." 

"I... I don't know," you almost laughed, thinking back in all of the trivial rivalry as you stepped in front of your privacy screen. "I mean it's been years." 

Your maid shook her head, singling that the dress you had tried on wasn't the one for you. You nodded and went back behind the screen, waiting for her to give you another dress. 

"Maybe he forgot me." you added, just a smidge of sadness in your voice. 

"Don't get your hopes up." your maid handed you another dress. "He won't forget you that easily." 

You smiled and thanked her, then slipped into the dress. 

It was pastel pink in colour. Not that you were a big fan of it, but you thought that it went well with the dress. It was form fitting, until it got to the basque waist, where it went out and flowed to the floor. It was decorated with pastel blue, yellow, and green flowers. You adored the sleeves, they weren't too big but not too tight at the same time, and they were just the perfect length. It was comfortable, gorgeous, and stunning. 

"I love it," you announced, spinning around so your maid could see. "Thank you." 

She had a bright smile on her face, and quickly helped you tighten the corset in the back. "You must hurry, Princess. You can't leave your could-be-suitors waiting!" 

"Oh yes, I completely forgot." you sighed, hoping you didn't sound too rude. 

It wasn't a lie, you did forget. You were very excited for the dance, just not the reason. Your parents organized this dance in hope of finding a suitor for you. You've tried to convince them that you don't need one, that you'd be perfectly happy being unmarried, but since your parents were quite traditional, they decided to host it anyway. Now, people (not just princes) from all over the nine realms were here, and you weren't looking forward to it. They never fulfilled your standards. 

"Thank you," you said to your maid, smiling at her. "I'll be fine from here." 

You scurried to put on your shoes, and headed out of the room, where you heard the faint sound of the orchestra bless your ears. 

Taking a deep breath in to calm your nerves, you half wished Loki would be here. 

What? Y/N, no. You're supposed to hate him, you thought. You walked gracefully to the ballroom, one hand in the railing and the other lifting the skirt of your dress just a bit so it'd be easier to walk. The orchestra played quietly, letting the people gathered here tonight mindlessly chatter away. 

"Oh, here she is," you heard your mother say, pointing to the top of the stairs, where you were standing. You felt all eyes shift onto you as the talk faded away, but the orchestra was still playing. 

Taking a deep breath again, you looked down the stairs and thought 'It'll be fine.' 

And then you saw him. 

Loki. 

He was clad in all black; black suit, black shirt, black tie, you know it. His hair was slicked back, and just like always, he had that stupid smirk plastered on his face. The smirk you wanted so badly to wipe off his face. But at the same time, you couldn't help to have a certain attraction for the tall man. 

You scoffed and walked stepped gracefully down the stairs. You watched as he eyed you up and down and held out his hand for you. 

You accepted it, and watched suspiciously as he gently grazed his thumb over your knuckles, as if asking if you trust him. You just stared at him, curiously wondering what he was up to, but all he did was bring your hand up to his lips, and place a soft kiss on it. 

"You look ravishing, darling." Loki complimented you. "I like the way your hand fits perfectly into mine." 

"What's up with you?" 

"Nothing!" he replied, feigning sadness. "May I have a dance?" 

"I don't know, can I trust you? You're acting awfully nice." You teased, half meaning it. 

Loki nodded, and led you to the center of the ballroom. You heard shifting around you, you assumed that everyone was also getting ready to dance. You just knew that your parents were watching you like hawks, no doubt wondering why you haven't gotten with Loki when you've had so many "chances''. 

You interlocked one of your hands with Loki's, while your other one was resting his on your shoulder and his was on your shoulder blade. The ensemble started playing some waltz music, and every person started moving with their partner in sync. Mesmerizing movements filled the room, as the gents swirled around in circles with their lady partners around you and Loki. 

You actually danced quite a while with the tall, dark haired male. But everything you two did was in silence. There was eye contact, even some sexual tension, but both of you were silent. By the third dance, you decided to break the silence.  "Bloody hell. You can't dance." 

"Oh, can't I?" He hand slid onto your waist and he tightened his grip and pulled you closer, enough to touch your nose with his. "You should've told me you wanted to put on a show." 

"You don't have to be so rough," you whispered. The music swelled and felt as if it could deafen you. Your face was cross and your eyebrows were furrowed together, the desire to punch him square on the face growing on every step. "Your hand is supposed to stay on my shoulder blade." 

"Same thing" 

"Not even close." 

"Well, I'm sorry." 

"Please, that wouldn't even fool the dumbest baby." 

Loki laughed through his gritted teeth, blue eyes staring right into yours. "Fine, but can you keep up with those adorable little dancing shoes?" 

"Try me." 

You could feel the vibrations of the orchestra's music swimming in the air, attaching strings of gold onto your wrists and carrying you through the ballroom like a graceful marionette. The other dancers began to clear, far too mesmerized by your synchronized movements to focus on their own. The crowd formed a circle and allowed you to take over. 

Loki was light on his feet. You'll give him that. 

"You could at least try to pretend to resent this," Loki chuckled. "Careful now. Don't stare too deep into my eyes, otherwise you might fall in love." 

You scoffed, "You wish." 

"You're right." He spun you around and had you tripping on your toes. He swiftly caught you in his arms before you could fall to the ground. "I wish." 

The dance ended with everyone erupting in applause. The two of you stayed there, out of breath and staring into each other's eyes. 

After what felt like eternity, he let you go. You politely faced him and curtsied, then excused yourself, stepping away from the crowd and making your way up the stairs. You were suddenly aware of your own frantic hearts which seemed like it was about to burst out of your chest any minute. 

Loki's voice rang in your ear. "I wish," repeating over and over and over again, like a broken record. 

You finally made your way to your room and went out to the balcony. You realized it had felt so suffocating in there, with hundreds of people gathered around you. You let the fresh air clear your mind, but it wasn't working today. 

His voice kept ringing and something, somewhere, deep inside of you told you that you felt the same. But why? You were supposed to be enemies, you were supposed to hate each other, but it was the opposite now. 

The same thing that told you it was attraction, also told you that it made sense. The pet names, the charming looks, the mysterious personality, it attracted you. 

"I- I have feelings for him, don't I?" you whispered to yourself, almost out of pity. "I could've chosen anyone in that room, but no. My pathetic heart chose him. Him, of all people!" 

You faintly laughed, resting your forearms on the railing of the balcony, your head hung low and your eyes were shut. "God, this is laughable." 

"May I ask what's laughable, princess?" a familiar voice startled you. 

You spun around and supported your weight by having your hands on the railing behind you, as you looked up to the tall prince. "Nothing," you said, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "Why are you here?" 

"I wanted to see if you're alright." Loki replied after hesitating. "And to apologize, I feel like I made you uncomfortable." 

You tilted your head to the side, and simply stared at the man. "Why are you so polite?" 

"..." 

Loki stayed quiet and stood beside you. Both if you were looking up at the beautiful night sky, at the complex constellations, and the bright full moon. 

"Is it true what you said?" you decided to break the silence for the second time. 

Loki simply looked down at you, his eyebrows furrowed. 

"When you said 'I wish,'" you added, looking up at the man beside you. "Did you mean it?" 

"Well..." he sighed, looking down, then back at you. "Yes. I just never knew how to tell you until now." 

"Really?" 

"With all my heart." 

You two simply looked at each other, not knowing what to say. Your head was swarmed with thoughts like '’Oh my god, he just confessed'  and 'What do I do? Do I confess as well?'  and 'Y/N, you're so stupid, just kiss him already!' 

It all felt like a fever dream. You were just standing there, in complete shock. Your enemy since who knows when just confessed his love for you, you felt the same way back but you just couldn't open your mouth to speak to save your life. 

"May I have another dance?" Loki held out his hand. 

You nodded, accepting it. His left hand held your right fingers intertwining. His other, however, wasn't at your shoulder blade like they were supposed to be while waltzing. Instead he let his hand rest on your waist, pulling you in close, but not enough to make our noses touch like in the ballroom. That stupid smirk returned to his face, but this time you didn't feel like punching it off if his face like you usually did. Gradually, Loki started leading the slow waltz as you followed along, looking down at your feet and avoiding eye contact. 

"Do you feel the same?" He asked. You could've swore you heard a tinge of hopefulness is his voice. 

"Yes, actually," you replied, finally making eye contact but looking back down again. "I didn't realize it until tonight." 

"That makes the two of us." He chuckled. 

The cold breeze of the dark sky made faint goosebumps on your skin. You barely shivered, but Loki pulled you in a bit closer like he was using his body as a shield to protect yours. 

You slowly started humming a tune to steady your rhythm a bit, and Loki joined in, knowing exactly which piece you were humming. You smiled and let your head rest on his chest, the tiredness of the night finally getting to you. 

"Tired already, angel? It's not even midnight yet." 

"Oh, will you ever shut it? We were having a nice moment for once, if you couldn't tell" Both of you went into a hushed fit of laughter. 

Loki felt like nothing else mattered but you at the moment. He studied your face, memorizing every detail, as if this was the last time he'd ever see you again. The way your eyes would crinkle at the corners, the way your nose you scrunch up when you laughed, the way your lips always looked so kissable. He admired you, the way you always had snarky comebacks to his comments, the way you would scoff whenever he annoyed you, the way you would always seem so nonchalant which always kept him wanting more. 

In short, to Loki you were his whole world, even if he only realized it that very same evening. 

Loki took the hand that was entangled with yours and cupped your face, his thumb rubbing back and forth on your cheek. He pulled you closer by your waist, making you look up at him. Your free hand hinges around Loki's neck, playing with the ends of his hair. 

He slowly pulled you in, but stopped just before his lips met yours. You could feel his breath fanning over them. You could smell his cologne; you could get intoxicated off of it, you didn't know it was like a drug for you until now. You saw that Loki's eyes were half closed, they were staring at your lips, almost like he was unsure of what he was doing. 

You pushed your boy onto his, your lips colliding, and you gently tugged on his hair, while he cupped your face lovingly. You could stay like this for eternity, but you ran out of breath and pulled back. The two of you were quietly gasping for air, your foreheads resting against each other. 

"I care for you Y/N," he murmured, barely loud enough for you to hear. No one else was there, but he wanted you, and only you, to hear it. "deeply." 

"If that was your way to say 'I love you' Loki, I love you too."

[sunmoonandeddie]

the sins of the father

pairing: prince!bucky barnes x pirate!reader

word count: 10,095

summary: You were nothing more than the Siren, the She-Demon of the Seas.  At least, that’s what you thought.

warnings: POORLY WRITTEN SMUT PLEASE FORGIVE ME IDK WHAT I’M DOING.  AND BAD WORDS.

a/n:  So like. I’m real nervous about this one.  Let me know what you think.

“Captain!  Captain!”

Waves crashed up against the side of the ship, dark clouds covering the sky.  There was the promise of a storm on the wind, though it wouldn’t come for a few days, you were sure.

“It’s a perfect day for sailing, don’t you think?” You asked as you leaned against the railing of the ship, taking your spyglass away from your eye.

The footsteps that had been hurrying to you stopped a few feet away.  “Captain, there’s a ship on the horizon.  Royal Navy.”  From the voice, you could tell it was Peter.  Sweet, sweet Peter.

“Oh, really?” You said as you stared out towards the white caps.  “And which Royal Navy is it?”

“Ithair.”

Now that…  That piqued your interest.  “Ithair, you say?”

The large kingdom was one of the most powerful in the world currently.  Their Navy was tough.  It was up there alongside Sonia.

But not as tough as your men.

“They’re coming up on the port side,” Peter says, his feet nervously shuffling as he stands before you.

“Thank you, Peter,” you said as you fixed your jacket.  You knew he was waiting for orders, but you made him wait just an extra minute or two.  “Tell the men to get ready.  We’re taking this one.”

Your men were always thrown into a dither anytime you gave the order to get ready for an attack.  The excitement in the air was palpable.  From your spot on the stern, you could see the men on the other ship rushing around just as hurriedly, clearly worried by the sight of your flag flying high in the sky.

You were the most feared pirate in the seven seas.  And for good reason, too.  You took what you wanted with no apologies.  You were ruthless.

That wasn’t to say you were without honor, though.  You had rules.

No women.  No children.  If a man surrenders, allow him his life.  He’s already lost his dignity.

But the Royal Navy, well…  They didn’t allow women or children on board, and they didn’t tend to surrender.  They were stubborn like that.

“Get ready, men,” you shouted above the rabble as you unsheathed your jewel encrusted cutlass.  Your left hand touched the handle of your dagger that your kept strapped to your thigh, ensuring that it was there.

You’d never lost a fight before and you weren’t planning on it now.

As the fight began, you stood above it all, peering down at them like a merciless god.

Your men invaded their ship with ease, taking down any of those who would dare stand against them.  Navy men were relatively easy to take down.  They got big egos from wearing a uniform, as though wearing a blue coat with some fancy buttons made them better than anyone else.

You walked along the edge of the stern, frowning as your eyes caught on something rather peculiar.

A man not in a Navy uniform.  Interesting.

“Peter,” you called out to the young man, who had just finished off a man on the deck below.

He climbed up the stairs quickly, wiping the blood on his cutlass off on his breeches.  “Yes, Captain?”

“Who is that man?” You asked, pointing towards the dark-haired man you’d spotted.

Peter had spent many years at the Ithairian court before his parents and uncle died in a fire.  His Aunt May hadn’t been able to keep up with the running of the family estate, and the king had cast them out, making them peasants.  The young man had joined your crew soon after and sent all the money he made from you and your crew’s raids back to May.

He squinted as he looked at the man, before realization bloomed in his eyes.  “That’s Crown Prince James.”

“Oh, really?” You said as you eyed the man, lazily twirling the jeweled cutlass in your hand.  “And tell me, Peter…  How much do you think the King and Queen of Ithair would pay to get their precious son back?”

It didn’t take much to get the Navy ship to surrender.

Once they realized you were holding their precious prince captive, they became rather docile, actually.

You’d had Peter lure him over to your ship, playing as though he hadn’t a clue what he was doing, a poor clueless orphan that had been kidnapped by pirates and held aboard the infamous Medusa’s Revenge. 

The prince’s heart was too pure for his own good.

Once he was close enough, you’d snuck up behind, forcing him to his knees with a swift kick.  Both ships had gone silent once they realized you were holding a blade to his throat while Peter tied his hands.

“You tricked me,” Prince James spat at Peter, his face twisted in a scowl.

“I was simply following the Captain’s orders,” he said, which brought his attention to you.

You kept your sword to his throat, teasing the soft, smooth skin there with the dull side of the blade.  “RETURN TO YOUR KING,” you shouted to the Captain of the Navy ship, a man by the name of James Rhodes that was glaring daggers at you.  You deepened your voice in a way that you had rehearsed over and over.  “AND TELL HIM THAT HE MAY HAVE HIS PRECIOUS HEIR BACK ONCE I RECEIVE PAYMENT.”

“This is outrageous!” Rhodes shouted back at you.  His blue Navy coat and white shirt was splattered in blood.  “You can’t make demands of the King!”

“Oh, really?” You said, a sadistic grin tugging at your lips.  “If you won’t tell him of my demand, then you can tell him why his only heir’s blood is spilled all over my deck and why his body was tossed to the waves.”

He kept his dark eyes narrowed on you, as though he was expecting you to back down.

You narrowed yours in return, the playful teasing disappearing as you snarled, “Try me, Captain.”

The air was heavy as the others waited for his response.  Finally, he gritted his teeth and asked, “How much?”

“£50,000.”

Rhodes choked on air as he stared at you in disbelief.  “You can’t be serious.”

“Oh, but I am,” you said as you bent low, your cheek pressed to the prince’s, who squirmed.  “I’ll be at the Rimora port in a month.  Some of my men will meet you there to collect the money before we release the prince to you.  Come alone, or you’ll be getting a head.”

The man had no choice but to agree.  He nodded stiffly, before ordering his remaining men back to the Navy vessel.

They couldn’t win the battle even before you captured the prince.

You waited until the Navy ship was sailing back to Ithair to remove your cutlass from Prince James’s throat.  “Please accept my most sincere apology, Your Highness,” you said with only a tinge of sarcasm, sheathing your sword.  “I didn’t have to fight in this battle, so at least I didn’t drip blood all over your fine silk shirt.”

“How kind of you,” he said, fixing his startling blue eyes on you.

“I don’t believe we’ve officially met,” you said as you took off your hat with a flourish, curtsying.  You had piled your hair atop your head to tuck under the cap and flattened your chest with a specially made corset.  From a distance, you appeared to be a man.  Up close, your gender was more obvious, but you could still pass as a rather feminine man.  You gave him your name, before quickly adding, “I’m the Captain of this fine vessel.”

Prince James’s eyes widened as he stared at you.  “You’re the Siren,” he whispered.  “You’re her.”

Raising your eyebrows, you glanced over at your first mate, Sam, who shrugged.  “The Siren?” You said, turning back to the prince.  “What kind of fucking name is that?”

“The Siren,” he said, as though it were obvious.  “The She-Pirate.  The She-Demon of the Seas.  You lure men to their deaths with a bat of your eyelashes.”

“She-Demon?” You repeated, pursing your lower lip.  Facing Sam, you fake pouted.  “I’m not that bad, am I?”

“You and I both know you’re much worse, Captain.”

You couldn’t stop the sly smile from creeping up on your face, though your heart twisted.  “I do quite like that name though.  The Siren.  It’s fitting, don’t you think?”  You placed your hat back on your head, already walking away from your new prisoner.  “Tie him to the mast,” you called back.  “I’ll decide what to do with him later.”

Later turned out to be three days.

Prince James stayed tied to the mast, refusing to talk to anyone.  When you would approach to speak to him, he’d simply pretend you weren’t there, looking out at the waves.  The only person he would even slightly acknowledge was Peter, and that’s because you’d send him to the prince three times a day with food and water.

It was also kind of hard to ignore the boy, with how much he talked.

“Are you always this rude to hosts, Your Highness?” You asked at one point on the second day.

Though he didn’t look at you, his jaw had clenched so tightly that you were sure his teeth would shatter.

“Some prince you are,” you said mockingly, curtsying before returning to your perch at the wheel.

But then the storm you had predicted the day you’d first captured him arrived.

It was the worst one you’d seen in months, sheets of rain coming down hard.  Waves crashed into the bow of the ship as you steered into them.  Luckily you had a pretty heavy cargo underneath, making it harder for the wind to knock you over and you’d managed to get the sails secured in time, which made your job a whole lot easier.

You were no stranger to surviving storms.

Your heart jumped in your throat as you realized that the prince was still tied to the mast, soaking wet and unable to move.  “Fuck,” you swore as you searched for a crew member who wasn’t doing their best to keep water off the deck.  “PETER!”

The boy looked up from where he’d been using a bucket to toss some of the collected water overboard.

“UNTIE HIM!”

He knew who you were talking about immediately, running to the main mast and untying the prince.

Your hair stuck to your skin, salt water stinging your eyes as you shouted, “GET HIM BELOW DECK!”

You didn’t see the prince again until hours later, when the storm had died down.  You and your men were utterly exhausted.  You’d been at the helm the entire duration of the storm, and your arms were aching, despite your years of experience.

Sam had offered to take over for you, allowing you the rest you so desperately needed.

You dragged yourself to your quarters, ready to change into a set of dry clothes and collapse into bed.

But when you entered your office, you were surprised to find Prince James on the chaise lounge that you’d acquired on one of your raids.  He was half asleep, his arm hanging off the side.

You cleared your throat, frowning when he didn’t stir.  You did it again, a little louder.

Nothing.

Fed up, you shoved his leg, glaring down at him as he jerked awake.  “What the hell are you doing in my office, Your Highness?”  You spat his name out at him like it was an insult.

“This is where Peter told me to stay until after the storm was done,” he said, glaring right back.

“Did you lay all over my nice chaise in your soaking wet clothes?  Or did you at least wait until you were dry?” You asked, rolling your eyes.

Prince James scoffed.  “Of course, I did.  I’m not a heathen, unlike someone.”

“I’m so sorry, Your Highness,” you said, mocking him with an over-exaggerated bow.  “What ever can I do to make your stay more pleasurable?”

“Are you always like this?” He asked as he watched you move around the office.

Stripping off your overcoat, you tossed it on the chair.  “Like what?”

“Overly sardonic?”

Your white shirt was sticking to your skin and your corset underneath.  God, you wanted nothing more to get out of the restricting piece of clothing.  You’d been in it for hours, since before the storm began, but you couldn’t do that with him there.  You had to wait until you were really ready to retire to your bedroom for the night.

“Are…”  Prince James paused, his brows furrowing.  “Are you wearing a corset?”

“And here I thought you were unobservant,” you said as you grabbed the journal you kept from the center drawer.

“Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why do you wear a corset?”

Sighing, you dabbed your feather ink pen on the tip of your tongue before dipping it in the ink pot.  Truthfully, you could wait to do your journal entry until the morning–you’d actually been planning to, since you were so exhausted–but for some reason, you just kept stalling.  You could simply go to your room and lock the door, avoiding the prince’s company and his subsequent questions, but you didn’t.  “If we run into new ships, it’s better for them to think me a man, so I had a few corsets specially made,” you said softly, biting your lip as you scribbled down details of the storm.  You’d take inventory of what all had been damaged in the morning.

“Why?”

Huffing, you snapped, “Maybe your parents won’t pay the ransom just so they can get away from your endless questions.”

“They’re not nearly as interesting.”

Startled, your eyes flickered up to meet his, your cheeks hot.  You quickly turned your gaze back to the journal, shaking your head.  “Royalty rarely is these days.”

“So?” He prodded.  “The corset?”

You shrugged nonchalantly, signing off on the journal entry.  “Men don’t respect women.  I don’t want them to underestimate me just because I was born with a pair of tits and a cunt.”  You slapped the journal shut, shoving it back in the drawer.  “Besides, women are considered bad luck on ships.  It took my crew a while to stop believing in the superstition and accept me as their Captain.”

“That superstition only came about because people believe sailors will get distracted from their duties by a woman’s beauty,” Prince James said, watching you curiously.  In his exhausted state, he seemed to forget his filter as he added, “Though I can’t imagine how anyone can not be distracted by you.”

“Who wouldn’t get distracted by the She-Demon of the Seas?” You bit back, a sarcastic smile on your lips.  Before he could respond, you headed for the door that stood behind your desk, leading to your bedroom.  “You may sleep there until one of the bunks opens up.  Or your parents pay your ransom.”  Standing in the doorway, you turned back to look at him.  The light coming in from the setting sun cast a glow upon his face.  He looked like an angel straight out of a stained glass window in a cathedral.

You shut the door, a soft, “Goodnight, Captain,” coming from the other side of wood as you flipped the lock.

Prince James stayed on your chaise for two weeks, and it didn’t seem like he would be leaving anytime soon.  All the other bunks on the ship were taken, filled with your crew.

And you weren’t so cruel to force him to go back to sleeping outside, tied to the mast.

Even though sometimes he was so annoying that you seriously considered it.

You’d stopped by a small port town and while none of your men had abandoned ship and opened up a bunk for him, you did grab him a few sets of clothing, a few pillows, and an extra blanket.

Thankfully, he didn’t make any comments on how they weren’t up to his royal standards, because otherwise you probably would’ve fed him to the sharks.

Then again, he hadn’t made any comments like that after the first few days.  In fact, he’d been rather… sweet.  His demeanor had swiftly changed after you’d allowed him to be untied from the mast.  It wasn’t like he could go anywhere, after all.

Other than the depths of the sea, and you didn’t think he loathed your company enough to drown himself.

Maybe.

“You like him,” Sam said as he passed you a mug of mead, the liquid frothing over the side.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said as you took a long swig, glancing around the deck.  It was a calm night at sea, there was no sign of ships on the horizon.

It was a good night to let loose and live a little.  Usually, you’d allow the men their drink but wouldn’t partake in it.  You’d retire to your quarters before they got too rowdy, though you always heard the music they played late into the night.

James had started joining them a few nights after the storm, when you stopped tying him up.

Some nights, he came to your quarters so late that you were already in your bedroom, though you never could sleep before you were sure that he was on the chaise for the night.  You’d lie awake in bed, your corset off, and listen for the tell-tale opening and closing of the door.

Most nights, though, you’d still be sitting at your desk.  Whether you were flipping through papers and maps, writing in your journal, or reading from your massive collection of books, it didn’t matter.  He’d sit with you and talk.  Whether it was for a few minutes or sometimes hours, you’d talk and talk, and you would laugh.

And sometimes, you even felt like a woman.  The way his eyes would sparkle in the dim light of the candles sometimes made you think he saw you as more than a captain of a pirate ship.

But that was impossible.  Because he was a prince, the heir to one of the most powerful kingdoms in the world, and you were nothing but a She-Demon.

“Don’t play coy,” Sam said as he nudged your shoulder.  He wasn’t blind to the way you were watching James joke around with your crew.  He was laughing at some joke that Scott made, his head throne back.

“I’m not,” you said sternly.  Suddenly, the mead in your cup seemed even less appealing than poison.  You handed it to Sam as you stood, brushing off your breeches.  “I’m going to turn in.  Goodnight.”

Your first mate called after you, though you didn’t turn around.  You needed to get away.  You needed to get away from Sam and James and the rest of the crew and maybe, just maybe, you’d be able to get away from the feelings that had been blooming in your chest the last two weeks.

You were so stupid.  James would never like you, never want you the way you wanted him.  You were so stupid for trying to twist your hair into the latest fashions or buying skirts to wear around the ship.  You were wearing one now, the loose fabric ending at your shins.  Even though it wasn’t nearly as formal as the skirts most ladies wore–especially the ladies at court that James was most used to–it was still a skirt.  Even Peter had made a comment that was also sort of a compliment.

But it didn’t matter.  It was impractical for a Captain of a pirate ship, and you were stupid for it.

He wouldn’t ever see you as you wanted him to.

Your quarters felt so empty without James there.  There were little signs of him all over the room.  The two pillows on the chaise, the fur blankets that rested half on, half off.  The little stack of his clothing that you’d bought for him.  He’d been reading one of your books lately and had left it on the small table by the chaise, a hair ribbon that you’d given him tucked between the pages as a bookmark.  It was a new one, Robinson Crusoe by Daniel Defoe, that you’d picked up the same stop you’d gotten his things at.

God, your desk was a mess.  Maybe that’s what you could do, you could organize your papers instead of thinking about the way your heart skipped a beat every time you saw the dark-haired prince.

“Captain?”

Speak of the devil.

You turned to see James standing there in the doorway, his fair features illuminated by the candle light.  The white shirt he donned was left open, revealing dark hair splattered across his chest.  Clearing your throat, you turned your eyes back to the papers on your desk.  Your hands were shaking as you tried to organize them, doing your best to ignore how your heart pounded.  “Shouldn’t you be drinking with the men and making merry?”

“I have their company every night, they can do without me for a while,” he said, chuckling a little.  But when you didn’t laugh with him, he grew quiet.  “Captain?”

“Yes, Your Highness?”

“Don’t do that,” he said, taking slow, measured steps towards you.

“Don’t do what?”

He stopped by the edge of your desk, his fingers trailing along the dark wood.  “Don’t shut me out.  Please.”

Your conversation with Sam from earlier rang loud and clear in your mind.  “I’m not shutting you out, Your Highness,” you said sternly, avoiding his gaze as you shuffled through the papers.  “Do you wish to get ready for bed?  If you do, I can be out of your way in just a moment.”

“No.”

The silence between you was tense as you finally looked up at him.  “What do you want, Your Highness?”  You asked, hoping he didn’t notice the way your voice wavered.

“You.”

A stunned silence filled the room, your mind going completely blank.

“Surely you can’t be serious,” you said finally as you finally looked up at him, your brows furrowed and your lips twisted in a frown.

“I am.”  His blue eyes still shone as bright as the moon reflecting off the sea in the dim light.  He whispered your name as he came closer.  “Please…”

Shaking your head, you grabbed the papers and turned to shove them in a random drawer, your heart beating against your rib cage like a drum.  You were terrified that if he were to look you in the eyes, he’d be able to see the things you felt for him.  You’d be done for.  A laughing stock.  Forget being the Siren, the She-Pirate, the She-Demon of the Seas, you’d just be another woman whose name wouldn’t be uttered without being attached to a man’s.  The history books would simply remember you as a prince’s pirate whore, an anecdote before moving onto the story of whatever princess he’d end up marrying.

You jumped in surprise as he came up behind you, his chest pressed to your back.  “Your Highness–”

“Please,” he said, his breath hot against your ear.  “Don’t run from me.”  His hands gently covered yours where they rested desk, his fingertips trailing ever so gently from your wrists up to your shoulder.  “You are so beautiful,” he murmured.  He spoke your name like a prayer, like it was the one thing that might grant him the grace of whatever god was looking down upon the two of you.

You weren’t sure you were breathing.  Your heart had jumped into your throat and taken residence there and oh, his touch felt like fire on your skin.

“Say my name?”  He pressed a kiss to your hair, his right hand toying with the loose sleeve of your shirt.  “Please.”

He didn’t order you the way a prince would, the way he would’ve when he was first brought onto your ship.  No.  He asked.  And more than that, he asked kindly.  He asked as though it would sincerely bring him joy to hear his name falling from your lips.

“James,” you said, your lips curling around the unfamiliar letters as you said his name for the first time.

He let out a content sigh as your loose sleeve fell, exposing soft skin.  “Again,” he said as his head dropped to press sweet, almost innocent kisses to your shoulder.  His left hand moved to your hip as his lips traced the freckles he found.

“James, please.”  Your eyes fluttered shut as your head lolled to the side, granting him access to the smooth expanse of your neck.

“Please, what?”

“Please touch me.”

A growl reverberated in his throat as his hand slowly bunched up your damned skirts, exposing your bare thighs to the cool air, his calloused fingers tickling your soft skin.  You could feel a smirk against your neck as he found you bare underneath.  “Oh, darling,” he murmured.

“J-James,” you stammered, your knuckles white as you gripped the desk.

“Yes, love?” He asked, one finger daring to tease your folds.  “Fuck, you’re already so wet.  Is that for me?  Huh?  Is that for me?”

“Yes.  Yes.  All for you.”  Your breath was already so labored as you felt your knees go weak.

He reached down, and with one swoop, scooped you up into his arms.  “Not here,” he said when you looked at him in surprise.  “There will be time to take you on your desk later, Captain, but not now.”  He kicked the door that led to your private chambers open, his mouth finding yours as he carried you inside.  Moonlight filtered in through the portholes that lined the wall, illuminating the small room.  He laid you down on your unmade bed as though you were made of porcelain, his hand cradling your head as he laid it on the pillow.

You’d never been treated so gently, touched as though you might break.

You were not a delicate woman, after all.  You were made of the harshest storms, the highest waves, of salt and brine.  You held your own when it came to battle.  Your crew, your men, loved and respected you.  You fought for that.

But fuck, if being treated so softly didn’t bring tears to your eyes.

James stood before you as you leaned on your elbows, watching as he stripped off his loose white shirt, revealing miles of tanned skin and that smattering of dark curls on his chest that had teasing you just a few minutes before.

You breathed out his name as he kicked off his boots, his eyes never leaving your face.

He stood before you in just his breeches, breathing heavily as he looked at you.  “I’m going to take my time with you,” he said as he kneeled on the edge of the bed, crawling towards you.

“Oh?” You said as you swallowed around the lump in your throat.  You were still trying to process how he could look at you like you were the most precious gem in the world.

James unlaced your boots, letting them fall off the bed.  “I’m going to spend all night worshiping you,” he said as he pressed a soft kiss  to the inside of your ankle.  The beard that he’d grown while on your ship tickled your skin as he trailed his lips up your calf.  “My darling girl.  My sweet angel.”

Your skin felt like it was on fire as he kissed up your leg, getting closer and closer to the place you so desperately needed.

He stopped at your knee.  “May I?” He asked as he tugged on your linen skirt, his eyes smoldering in the dim light.  He waited until after you nodded to strip you down, leaving you bare on the bed.  When you moved to cover yourself, face hot from the heat of his gaze, he stopped you, grabbing your wrists and holding them back.  “Don’t hide yourself from me, my darling.”

With a surge of urgency, you pushed yourself up, your lips crashing into his.

James melted into you, his hand moving to cradle your head as he kissed you.  His free hand cupped your breast, rolling the nipple between his fingers.

It took you a moment to realize that the whimpering was coming from you.

He broke away to kiss along your jaw, down your neck, to the valley of your breasts.  “Fuck,” he said as he swirled his tongue around the nipple that wasn’t being teased by his fingers.  He nipped at it lightly before moving to the other, not stopping until both were hard.

You were even more shocked when he licked a stripe down the center of your stomach, stopping when he reached the patch of curls between your legs.  “Wh-What are you doing?” You asked, propping yourself up against the pillows.

“Has no one ever touched you like this?” He asked, blue eyes meeting yours.  When you shook your head, cheeks flushed, he frowned.  “When’s…  When’s the last time you were touched at all?”

Shrugging, you tried to close your legs, but he kept them parted.  “A while,” you murmured, trying to hide how embarrassed you were.

In truth, it had been more than a year.  And it hadn’t exactly been good.  Just a one night tryst in a little port town with a man who thought he was better than he actually was.

None of your experiences with men had made you too eager to go out and try to find your pleasure.  They all seemed so… selfish.

“Men don’t really like women that are more powerful than them,” you said, avoiding his gaze.

His index finger hooked under your chin, and he tilted your head up so your eyes met his.  “I’ve never desired someone more than I do you,” he breathed.  His nose nudged yours before stealing another soft kiss.  Before you could stop to think, he was back down between your legs, nosing at your curls.  His hot breath tickled your most private area before his tongue swiped through your folds.

You jerked in surprise, eyes blown wide.  “James!”

“Shh,” he said as he coaxed you back down.  Using two fingers, he revealed yourself to him.  “You’re so pretty…”  Using a flat tongue, he lapped at the wetness he found, eyes closing.

Your fingers tangled in his hair as you sat up on one elbow, determined to watch him.  You’d never had a man… taste you like he was.  “O-Oh…”

There was a slight sting as he sunk one finger into your heat, carefully curling it.  It had been much too long since you’d been touched.

It had been a long time since you’d lost your virtue, but you certainly felt like a virgin again.

“I’ve gotta get you opened up for me,” he said before finding your tiny bundle of nerves and sucking hard.

You saw stars as your jerked in his grip, feeling yourself growing closer and closer to something but not quite knowing what.  Wonton moans dripped from your lips as you crept along the edge.  You weren’t sure what you needed other than James.

“That’s it, darling,” he said, slipping another finger in and carefully scissoring you open.  “That’s it.  You’re doing so perfect for me.”

His tender words, mixed with the feeling of his thick fingers inside you and his tongue and how long it had been sent you over the precipice.

Your chest heaved as you tried to catch your breath, watching with hooded eyes as James slowly withdrew his fingers.  The wet digits sparkled in the light as he brought them to his mouth, sucking them off with a moan.

As he pushed his breeches down, you were suddenly hyper aware of just why he needed to prepare you so thoroughly.

He was thick.  Long, sure, but it was the girth of him that made you pause.  You’d had men before, but none of them quite as gifted.

“Is…  Is that going to fit?” You asked, swallowing around the lump that had jumped in your throat.

“Yes,” he said as he crawled between your legs, dropping open-mouthed kisses along the soft skin of your stomach.  “Don’t worry, my dear.  I’ll go slow.”

You drew him into a kiss, sloppy and deep and hoping it would convey the words that you were too afraid to say.

His cock teased the slick folds of your cunt before carefully sinking in inch by inch.

“James,” you moaned as you clutched onto him, your nails digging into the taut muscles of his back.  The stretch you felt around his cock was painful, but pleasant.

Yeah, it had definitely been too long.

“That’s it, darling, relax,” he said, his forehead dropping to rest against yours.  “I’ve got you.  I’ve got you.”

You bit your bottom lip so harshly you could taste iron.  Your breath mingled with his as he sank in to the hilt, his nose nudging yours.  You were almost kissing.  But instead, he teased you, keeping his rose petal lips just out of reach.

He rested there for a moment, the both of you adjusting.  The waves crashed up against the side of the ship, providing a rather pleasant underscoring to the labored breaths that filled the air.

When you were finally ready, you experimentally rolled your hips up against his, causing his icy blue eyes to pop open.

“Damn it, you’re so fuckin’ tight,” he moaned as he carefully pulled out before pushing all the way back in.  He kept his thrusts slow and deep, relishing in the feeling of you squeezing around him.  “You were made for me, weren’t you, darling?”

You wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him close as your fingers threaded into his hair.  “Don’t tease me,” you said, pulling him into a kiss.

“As you wish,” he said, picking up the pace.

His deep, raspy moans mixed with yours, creating an unheard symphony as the two of you collided.  Bass and soprano.  Man and woman.  Lover and lover.

There was no doubt in your mind that your crew knew what was happening behind closed doors, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care as he rocked into you.  Their raucous laughter was nothing but static in the back of your mind.

You felt like you were on fire.  Every part of you was alight.

You couldn’t be sure how long you spent underneath him.  Time was completely lost between sweet kisses and soft murmurs, things he whispered to you but couldn’t quite make out.  Sometimes you would catch a glimpse of the moon through one of the portholes as it rose higher and higher in the clear night sky.

You saw stars as he pushed you over the edge yet again, leaving you gasping his name.

You clenched around him and James groaned, his nails digging into the soft skin of your back.  “I’m gonna…  I’m gonna–”  He broke off as he pulled out of you just in time for thick, creamy white ribbons to decorate your stomach and thighs.  He stayed bent over you, his forehead resting against yours, as he fought to catch his breath.

A giggle escaped your lips, your chest heaving as you stole a kiss.

Even after what you’d just done, it still made you nervous.  It was so… intimate.

A slow smile tugged at his face as he returned the affection.  “I love you, my angel,” he whispered into the soft skin of your neck.

Three little words.  All it took was three little words to jolt your system.

You pushed him off of you, your heart pounding as you grabbed the closest shirt you could find, throwing it on.  It was definitely his, judging by how it hung off of you.  “Don’t mock me,” you snapped, glaring at him.

This was all a mistake.  He had seen it in your face, how you felt about him.  You had become what you always feared you would be, just a silly girl who wouldn’t be anything more than a prince’s pirate whore.

His blue eyes were wide with surprise as he watched you.  “What in Heaven’s name are you going on about?” He asked, trying to step towards you.  He was still completely bare, and it took everything in you not to give in and go to him.

But you wouldn’t be made a fool.

“You got what you wanted,” you said, a snarl on your lips.  “Go.  Leave me be.  You may tell all the men of the court that you bedded the She-Demon of the Seas.  You don’t have to dig the knife in anymore.”

He narrowed his eyes, grabbing his breeches.  “Is that what you think of me?”  He let out a harsh laugh that was more of a cry than anything.  “Do you truly think me so horrid that I would bed you for the sheer novelty of it?”

“Men are all the same.”  You threw one of his boots at him, feeling very much like a feral cat backed into a corner.  “You say all the things you know I want to hear just so you can get between my legs.”

You were lashing out.  You knew.  You weren’t stupid.

But you couldn’t allow yourself to be so… hysterical.  You would lose the respect of your men, your crew, if they knew that you were throwing a fit.

You willed yourself to go flat, your eyes cold and your lips pressed into a thin line.  You would be composed, collected.  “Get out of my room,” you bit out.

James stood there, looking a little lost.  He held his breeches to his chest like an anchor.  “What?”

“Get out of my room,” you repeated.  “Before I have one of my men throw you out.”

You wouldn’t let any of them see you so naked, but he didn’t need to know that.  As far as he knew, you were willing to let every single crew member see you naked if it meant he would be out.

He swallowed, leaving the room with a stiff nod.  “Fine.” 

The door shut behind him, and you quickly brought your hand to your mouth.  Your teeth clamped around your fingers as you tried to muffle the sob that tore from your throat.

You couldn’t do this.  You couldn’t be so weak.

This is what you got for letting him in, for letting him see you.

You quickly dressed, wiping away the dried remnants of him left on your body.  You pulled on your breeches, making a mental note to toss those stupid fucking skirts overboard the first chance you got.

Taking a glance in the mirror, you wiped at your eyes.  Thankfully, they weren’t too puffy.

You could cry later.

You came out of your room, appearing very much unbothered.

James had redressed, though he had a new shirt since his old one was in the corner of your room.  He stepped forward, his lips moving as though to speak your name.

Before he could make a sound, you were crossing the room, opening the door.  You were greeted with the lively sounds of music and laughter from the men still enjoying their night.  “Sam,” you called out, catching your First Mate’s attention.

“Captain!” He said with a joyous laugh, waggling his eyebrows.  “I didn’t expect to see you out of your quarters again tonight!”

“Gather the money needed for a horse,” you said, your tone causing the smile to drop from his face.  “We will dock in Marolan in two days.  We will give His Highness a horse to get back to his people.”

“What?” Sam said, his brown eyes wide.  “Why?  What about…”  He trailed off, thinking better about what he was going to say.  “What about the ransom money?”

You breezed past him, heading for the stern.  You had a feeling you wouldn’t be getting any sleep tonight, and it would be better to be at the helm and let the salty sea air calm you than toss and turn in your bed for hours.  “There are easier ways to get that kind of money than dealing with a prince.”

James called your name, having followed you out of your quarters.  “Don’t do this,” he said.

The rest of the crew went quiet, having noticed that something was going down.  The music that had rung through the air dissipated.

“I’m not doing anything, Your Highness,” you said as you took your place at the helm.  There was an ache between your thighs that you prayed would go away quickly.

It wouldn’t do to think of him anytime you so much as took a single step.

“YOU ARE CASTING ME OUT BECAUSE YOU ARE TERRIFIED OF YOUR OWN FEELINGS!”

Waves crashed against the side of the ship, the only sound amidst the deafening silence.

James was pissed.  Perhaps even more so than he had been the first day you’d captured him.  His hands were fisted at his sides as he started to climb the steps that led up to the stern.  “I love you.  And I’m willing to bet all of Ithair that you love me, too.”

“You feel the triumph of a false conquest,” you hissed, standing your ground.  “You think me to be a creature you have tamed.”

“I think nothing of the sort,” he said, holding onto the rails.  The wind whipped his long, dark locks around his face.  “You have me mind, body, and soul, my angel, my darling, my love.  Please…”

Your heart was racing.  There was a war inside of yourself.  You wanted nothing more than to fall into his arms and allow him to hold you, to comfort you.  But your head was telling you that this was nothing more than a dirty trick.

The men were watching unabashedly as he came closer.  His hand reached for yours, but you snatched it out of his grasp.  “I will give you everything,” he said, blue eyes searching yours desperately.  “I will give you a throne, a kingdom… me.”

“A She-Demon cannot sit upon a throne,” you spat, taking a step back.  “You will marry some princess, someone raised for that life.”

James shook his head, grabbing your hand despite your protests.  “I don’t care about some old rule.  I don’t want a princess. I want you.  I will speak with my father, and–”

Smack.

The slap resounded throughout the air.  The prince looked at you in shock, his hand reaching up to hold his cheek.

“Do not touch me,” you said, gritting your teeth.  “And it’s your father’s fault that I’m a pirate in the first place.  He is the reason for me becoming the She-Demon you hear tavern tales about.”

“What?” He asked, still holding his reddening cheek.

You felt a little bad about slapping him, but you’d made it clear that you didn’t want him touching you and then he did.

“Your father allowed his soldiers to destroy my village,” you said, fury boiling in your veins.  “I was fifteen when they came, ransacking our homes, killing our men, kidnapping our women and children.  We had nothing to do with his war with our king, but he didn’t care.”  Blood trickled from your hands, where your nails had dug so deep into your palms that they’d cut through the tender skin.  “More than one of your soldiers attempted to carry me off.  I was lucky to make it out alive.”

James had gone silent by now, shock and sorrow written across his face plain as day.

“One of your men chased me all the way to the docks.  The only reason I survived was because I made it onto a pirate ship that had docked there.”  Most of your men knew your story.  You hadn’t tried to hide it, though it wasn’t something that was openly discussed.  “The Captain found me and took me under his wing,” you said.  “He gave me this ship, but your father is the reason why I’m the She-Demon you speak of.”

“I didn’t know,” he said softly, swallowing down the lump that had lodged in his throat.  “I swear to you, my angel, I didn’t know.”  He reached out for you again, but thought better of it.  “I was only eighteen when the war happened.  I didn’t know.  He didn’t tell me all the soldiers did.”

“Because you didn’t ask,” you said.  “Because we were poor, and the king doesn’t give a damn unless you have a title.”  You turned back to the helm, your hands resting on the wheel.  “You will get off my ship at Marolan.  Speak of me how you wish.  The words of a royal mean nothing to me.”

You could feel his eyes burning into the side of your head, as though wishing you’d turn back to him and say it had all been a jest.  But you didn’t.  You kept your eyes ahead as you set the course for the port city.

“Whatever you wish, Captain,” he said, the words half lost in the wind.

You bit your lip to keep the tears at bay as you heard him go back down the stairs to the main deck before disappearing into your quarters.

It didn’t matter.

You’d be at the helm all night.

Footsteps sounded on the stairs, and you knew it was Sam without even looking.  “What do you need?” You asked, your voice cracking despite your attempt to sound tough.

He stood at your side, his arms crossed over his chest.  “Are you going to punish the son for the sins of the father?”

“He has his own sins to atone for,” you said softly, “Just like his father, just like me.”

“Is that what this is?  Self punishment?”

“You heard him.”  You gripped the wheel so tightly your knuckles turned white.  “I am but a She-Demon.”

Sam glanced down to the deck, the men not-so-subtly taking glances at you.  “He never called you that, if I remember correctly.  He simply said that’s what others have called you.  But he never did.”

You didn’t reply, choosing to stay silent as you stared ahead.

If you opened your mouth, all that would come out were broken sobs.

You didn’t speak for James for the last two days he spent on your ship.  You stayed out of your quarters during the night, and when he finally awoke and left your office, you snuck in and locked your bedroom door.

You stood atop the stern, looking down at the tiny port town that you had docked at.  Your men took the chance to explore some of the shops since this was an unplanned stop.

James stood at the top of the ramp that led down to the dock.  You’d had Sam give him enough gold to pay for a horse and then some.

The sun gleamed off his dark hair, tied back with the green silk ribbon that he’d been using as a bookmark.  He looked like a man from a romance novel, one of those Shakespearean heroes.

He looked up at you, his blue eyes startling even as far away as he was.  “Goodbye, Captain,” he said, his voice barely audible.

You swallowed, looking away.  “Goodbye, Your Highness.”

Hot tears pricked your eyes as he walked down the ramp, the sound of the gold clinking in his pocket fading as he got further and further away.  Ignoring the men still on the ship, you stormed down the stairs and into your quarters, slamming the door to your office shut and locking it.

It was only once you were alone that you allowed yourself to collapse.  You fell to your knees as sobs wracked your body.  The feelings you’d been fighting had fought their way to the surface, breaking through your glass exterior.

How had he done it?  How had the prince wormed his way into your heart?  He had slipped through the bars of its rib cage prison and sunk his teeth into what you thought had been a frozen chunk of ice.

You rubbed your face, trying to contain yourself to no avail.

But something caught your eye.

There, on the chaise, was a folded piece of parchment.

You crawled over to it, feeling no shame at how pathetic it was.  Your hand covered your mouth to muffle another sob as you recognized James’s handwriting.  Some of the letters were runny, misshapen from the tear stains that littered the paper.

My darling angel,

If you’re reading this, it means that I’m gone.  You’ve cast me off your ship and out of your heart.

But I can’t let you think that I was simply trying to conquer you.  I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I left without telling you, and you won’t even look in my direction, which is why I have taken to paper and pen.

I meant what I said that night.  I love you with all of my soul.  You surprised me with your wit, your strength.  I never dreamed that I would meet a woman like you, and I mean that in the best way possible.  If you would allow me to, I would make you my wife, my queen.

It is not hard to guess that you think I couldn’t see you as anything more than a pirate, but you’re wrong.  The softness that you try to hide calls to me.  I want to take you in my arms and show you that the world will not always be cruel to you.

My father was wrong to allow his soldiers to do what they did.  It was not your war.  You were innocent.  If there was a way for me to turn back the clock and stop it all from happening, I would.  I would give you your village back, your family back.

Alas, I am incapable of doing so, despite how badly I long to.  So I must do the next best thing.

I will be a better king than my father.  I will do my best to ensure that there are no more innocent people punished by cruel, battle hungry men.

I won’t allow any more little girls to be sentenced to running from grown men who should know better.

I wish I could give you back your girlhood, my love.  I wish I could see you with daisies in your hair, untouched by the horrors of the world.

If you will not allow me to love you up close, then this is how I shall love you from far away.  I will do better than my father, in your name.

Is it peculiar of me to say that I miss you already?  You are simply above deck, and yet, my hands long to hold yours, my lips feel like winter ice.  Must you really leave me alone?

I am fearful that when I leave the Medusa’s Revenge, I shall never see you again.

I haven’t slept in the past two nights, but my nightmares invade my daydreams and make me see visions of a life without you, the life I am facing ahead of me.

How is it that I have fallen so deeply in love with you in such a short amount of time?

Perhaps, if I am lucky, and if you are feeling so gracious, I will hear your voice one last time before I go.  Is it so greedy of me to wish to hear my name falling from your lips one last time?  To feel you gaze upon my face, even if it is with scorn?

When I am back in my castle in Ithair, I shall pace the royal gardens and lament that the red roses the gardeners so painstakingly tend to cannot compare to thy sweet lips.  I shall cry each night that the furs that line my bed are not as warm as your embrace.

Will you miss me as I miss you?  It may be wrong of me to hope so, but I do.  I shall miss you ‘til my dying breath, and perhaps even beyond then.

Will your siren’s song call to me beyond the grave?  I suppose I shall have to wait and find out.

I will speak of you fondly, lovingly, for you were never the She-Demon the bastards tried to make you out to be.

Forever yours, my love,

James Buchanan Barnes

If any of your crew noticed that your eyes were swollen and glassy when they came back, ready to set off, they didn’t mention it.

Almost two years had passed.

Two years, and yet you were still crying yourself to sleep most nights.

Prince James had truly done his damage in the short amount of time he spent on your ship.

Well, he wasn’t a prince anymore.

When you’d docked in Genia about four months ago, you’d been given the news that his father, King George IX, had died, and King James II had been coronated.

You’d avoided docking at any of Ithair’s ports since letting him go.  You refused to risk seeing any sign of him.

Your heart wouldn’t be able to take it.

You kept his goodbye letter close to you at all times.  When you went into battle, the tear stained parchment was tucked inside of your corset, right over your heart.

You read it every night before you went to sleep, the parchment soft from how often it was unfolded and refolded.

“Captain,” Peter called to you from the deck.  The boy had grown so much in the time since James had left.  He was no longer the lowest member of the crew.  He’d been given more responsibilities, and if you were being honest, was the person you trusted most on your crew, behind Sam, of course.

“Yes, Peter?”  You had one hand on the wheel, and you were half lost in a daydream.

“There’s a ship coming up on the starboard side,” he said.

Frowning, you turned to your right, and sure enough, there was a ship much closer than you first thought it’d be.

Had you really been so deep within your own thoughts?

“Do you know whose ship?”

“Ithair.  Navy.”

Ice ran through your veins as you turned back to the helm.  “Tell the men to ready themselves, but we are not planning on fighting.  We’re going to avoid them if we can.”  Your hands were shaking as you turned the wheel, planning on making a sharp left and avoiding them completely.  “Get Sam,” you said after a moment as your hands refused to stop trembling.

Your First Mate was there within seconds, taking over.  “I’ve got this,” he said, ushering you away.  He knew how you were feeling with just a look.  “If we really need you, I’ll send Peter.”

You nodded, swallowing thickly as you went to your quarters, shutting the door before you began to pace.

It couldn’t be him… could it?

Surely he wouldn’t taunt you with his presence like that.  After all, it would be cruel.  There was no way he didn’t have some princess waiting for him.

But then again, wouldn’t you have heard of a royal engagement when you heard of his coronation if that were the case?

No.  You couldn’t think like that.

Besides, he most likely wasn’t on the ship.

A king had better things to do.

You grabbed your jewel encrusted dagger from your desk, sliding it into its sheath.  Your cutlass was already ready at your side, just in case.

But when you opened the door to step out onto the deck, you were caught by surprise.

Your ship hadn’t been steered away as you’d wanted it to.  The Ithairian Navy ship was right alongside yours, a plank connecting the two.  And more than that, there was no fight going on.

King James stood before you, grinning as Peter rambled onto him about all that had happened since he left.

A board creaked under your foot, and his head snapped in your direction.  Your breath caught in your throat as his eyes met yours.

He looked older, more worn.  Maybe a little tired.  There were shadows under his eyes, and his hair was longer.

It was tied back out of his face with a green silk ribbon.

Your mouth went dry as you stared at him, not daring to move any closer.  “Have you come to kill the Siren?” You asked, though you didn’t bother to reach for your cutlass.

If he truly wished to gut you, you would allow him to.  It would hurt less than living with the pain of knowing that he wanted you dead.

“No,” he said, his voice soft and full of something you couldn’t quite name.  “I’ve come to wed her.”

You blinked in surprise, your heart constricting.  “Do you now?” You asked slowly.  The letter that was pressed to your chest felt like it was burning your skin.

“Well, I truly hope so,” he said as he came a few steps closer, his hands behind his back.  From what you could see, he had no weapon.

Perhaps he truly wasn’t here to hurt you.

“You see, you’re not exactly an easy person to track down,” he said, stopping a few feet away.  “Especially since you haven’t docked at any Ithairian ports in almost two years.”  He reached inside his coat, pulling out a small box.

“Your Majesty–”  Your voice cracked as you snuck a glance at the people watching you.  Your crew and his were staring, grins on their faces as though this was the most normal thing in the world.

James ignored your question, looking at the ring with a soft smile.  “It took Sam sending me a letter from the last place you’d been docked at, telling me where you were heading, to find you.”

The man in question had the decency to look a little sheepish.  “It’s time for something new,” he said, leaning against the railing of the steps that led up to the stern.  “You haven’t been happy with this life ever since James left.”

He wasn’t wrong, per say, but you thought you’d hidden it better than you apparently had.

“Well…”  You turned to look back at James, shaking your head.  “You…  You can’t marry a pirate.  Or even just a commoner.”

“Why not, my love?” He asked as he got down on one knee, holding the ring up for you to see.  It sparkled in the late afternoon sun.  “I thought that the point of being king was that I made the rules.”

Your heart was racing faster than it ever had before.  “I…  I keep your letter on me,” you blurted out, stumbling over your words like a newborn foal.  Your fingers trembled as you reached through the neckline of your shirt, into your corset, before pulling out the worn piece of paper.  “I read it every n-night before I go to sleep.”  You didn’t realize you were crying until you felt a tear hit your hand.

“Have you missed me as I’ve missed you, my angel?” He asked, not moving.  His own eyes were glassy, his speech thick from emotion.  “I’ve dreamed of you every moment, waking and asleep.”

“I have.  I have, James,” you gasped out, your chest heaving against the corset.  “I’ve missed you so much.”

His hand reached for your left, grasping it softly and bringing it to his lips.  “Will you marry me?”  He looked up at you with pleading blue eyes.  “Please, my angel?  I shall never ask for anything more if you say yes.”

You fell to your knees in front of him, your hands grasping his face as you pulled him in for a kiss.  “Yes,” you whispered against his lips.  The salt from both of your tears lingered in your mouth, but you didn’t care as you pulled him into another kiss.  “Yes, I will marry you.”

The ring somehow found your left finger, sliding on with ease.

“I love you,” you said as you pulled away for air, resting your forehead against his.  “I love you so much and I’m so sorry I was too afraid to say it then.”

“Shh,” he said, caressing your face.  “You have nothing to be sorry for, my darling.”  He stole another kiss, a smile creeping up on his face.  “And I love you, too, my siren.”

“James?” You said, your nose nudging his.  His breath mingled with yours in the most delicious way.  Your chest was pressed against his, your arms wrapping around his neck.  It felt so good to have him in your arms again after two years.

You’d thought you’d only get this in your dreams.

“Yes, my angel?”

“Does this mean I have to wear dresses?”

[hongism]

hi caly!!! i finally had the time to read moc40 AND OH WOW OH WOW OH W O W I’M SO SO PROUD OF YOU AND BESTIE THIS CHAPTER WAS SO SO INCREDIBLE LIKE THE PACING AND EVERYTHING ELSE WAS INCREDIBLE AND OFC I HAVE MUCH TO SAY 🥺🥺💗💗 - 🦔

hi bestie i’m finally here eeek sorry it took me so long to respond T_T !!! thank you so much for being proud of me tho oh my gawd that makes me so happy to hear im so glad you loved it eeeeee YOU’RE TOO SWEET TO ME BESTIE ILYSM 💗💕❤💕💗❤💕💗🥺

the opening between hongjoong and mc about hyunwoo :( i don’t know how to word this but he’s truly such an observant and complicated character especially how he treats mc, which makes him a character who’s really fun to read!!

pls it makes me so happy to hear that you enjoy and it’s fun to read hongjoong’s character, he’s one i enjoy a lot. i think previously a lot perceived hongjoong as a character who didn’t really care to pay attention to what’s going on around him, but he’s rather perceptive and notices quite a bit. it’s a good deep dive into his character in my opinion and a good ‘breaking point’ into his character in the future too!

the short convo between the guards was just…wow…bc it’s kinda a reminder that not everyone working for the military is entirely a piece of crap? like some of them are also questioning the ethics and morality and stuff like that? idk i found that part pretty important :(((

that convo between the guards wasn’t in my first draft, and i actually didn’t end up adding it to the chapter until i was almost done writing the chapter. i think for most of the story we haven’t really seen the crew doing something ‘wrong’ or anything like that, and even tho they are criminals, we haven’t seen that from them. this look into the guards, people who are perceived to be ‘bad’ by the crew but ‘good’ from the public’s view... it was kind of a peek into morality and how that effects people as a whole. i think it’s super important for sure and it’ll come back around a lot more in the future :((

CORSET AND DRESS CAPTAIN JOONG YAYAYYAYAYA

CORSET AND DRESS CAPTAIN JOOOOOOOOOOONG

san did what in the past :(((((( my bby :((( it hurts to read about san’s past but it definitely shows more similarities between him and mc :(((

there are lots of things we don’t know about san tbh and there are lots of pieces of his past that are starting to fall together and come together and not all of them are happy and good :( he and mc definitely have a lot of similarities and parallels in who they are as characters, and we’ll see that more and more in upcoming chapters :(

captain joong going soft just a teeny bit?? :’))) we love to see it hehe though i am curious as to how san got that ring in the first place 👁👁 very suspicious and it also makes me more convinced that joong is a normie 🤨

teeeeeeeeny bit of softness on our joong :3 we know san is his soft spot for sure, and that’s his little ‘weakness’ in a way, and it’s the best way to peak into his softer side :(( very suspicious eh 👁👁🍿 inchresting inchresting 👁👁🍿

i didn’t even realise that jisung’s tampering with mc’s memories could affect her using her siren abilities :/// more of a reason for me to drop kick moc jisung into space

!!! this is definitely something that hasn’t been ~delved into~ a lot yet but the people who tampered with her brain and memories blocked off this whole section of memories about what she is and how she can even function as a siren :(

MC HOLY CRAP??????? SHE REALLY JUST RIPPED-OH MY GOD WHAT A WAY TO REDISCOVER YOUR CAPABILITIES FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A WHILE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

JKDGJHKDJHKGJKHSDF the HIGHLIGHT (one of them) of the chapter, the heart ripping, this is something i cannot WAIT to get into :3

“how much would your pride suffer to admit that the only person holding you back from being open and honest with the people around you is yourself?” CALY THIS HURTS

IM SORRY IT HAD TO BE DONE </3

“who we are and what we are… why should either of those things be important in the face of trust?” I LOVE MOC SAN I LOVE HIM IK I USED TO SAY I WAS THE CAPTAIN OF THE MOC HWA X MC SHIP BUT-BUT THIS CHAPTER MUST JUST CONVINCE ME TO ABANDON SHIP BC THEYRE SO CUTE THE KISS AAAAAAAAA ;;;;;;; CALY COME BACK IM SO SAD

PLS </3 IM SO GLAD YOU CAME TO THE MOC SAN SHIP come here bestie i’ll hold u okay it’s GONNA BE OKAY ✋😔

[appleb0mb]

Agapanthus - Art Process! (Part One)

Lemme just say - Agapanthus is by far the most hardest track and art I’ve ever made. Like sleep was basically non-existent here-

Step One: Rough Draft

This was created on December 27th - around 4 days before the release of Agapanthus, I believe. However I’m not gonna lie, this is looking pretty horrible. I’m glad I didn’t even continue with this reference  ( ｡_｡) . 

I remember using myself as reference, but that wasn’t really working out. I really wanted Vil to have an intimidating look to him, and he’s just staring you down - underestimating MC/Yuu. But I realized...

That isn’t Vil. Vil isn’t like that at all, and it completely changed the idea about him. So I decided to change the expression and pose that Vil was making and start it all over instead.

Step Two (1): Rough Lineart + Cleanup (Head)

Okkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk....

I had to change and redraw a lot of the pose I was making! It was incredibly risky, but I had to do it anyways! 

Just for you guys, I made sure to break it down a bit more so you can see what’s behind the scenes in more depth...

I did the head in the following order:

(1) Head 

(2) Eyes, Nose, and Mouth

(3) Hair

*(4) Halos - Zwei (middle)

*(5) Einz (left), Drei (right) 

(6) Crown - I used the crown from The Aphrodites and add it to his hair heheheh

(7) Agapanthus #1 - THIS ONE TOOK ME LIKE 6+ LAYERS TO DO LOL

*For Step 4 - I split the structure of the halo into two layers: A circle, and sharp pointy things before merging the layers together. I made sure to not let the pointy areas overlap with the circle. Lots of Control + Z was used here LOL

As for Step 5 the halos can be one or the other, I don’t know which one I started with at the time.

For his expression, I must admit that I don’t like it. It makes Vil look puzzled, or dumbfounded yet...a bit hopeful. But after seeing what happened to Step One, I decided to go along with it (:P). 

< Note: For Step Two, I did the rough lineart -> cleanup for each part - so that’s why I merged Step Two and Three together. >

Step Two (2): Rough Lineart  + Cleanup (Agapanthus AND Crocus)

OH HELP ME NOW LOL  (˙ ͜ʟ˙ )

I’m sorry, this part was the most longest things I’ve ever taken when it comes to lineart. I’m sorry.

Seriously! This was one of the longest because it was not one flower, but a BOUQUET of flowers!!! I remember my back hurting a lot and didn’t getting enough sleep as a result...this took me 12 hours to finish just the bouquet alone.

Apologies for the detail below!!!

Note: For some information, I won’t go into detail since it’s impossible to see with the picture above due to the picture limit. 

(1) Drawing the Flowers:

 (1) Agapanthus (wide, inward, middle flowers)-  This took about six layers to do the following:

(1.1) FLOWER (DRAFT) - Here, I drew the basics of its form and its shape. I drew a donut-like shape and short piece of the stem before doing the lineart.

(1.2) Flower (Lineart): 

(1.2.1) Flower - Lineart - OPEN FLOWER: I did the five petal shaped flower first, then refined it to have a finished look.

(1.2.2) Flower - Lineart - CLOSED FLOWER

(1.2.3) Flower - Lineart - UNBLOOMED FLOWER

(1.2.4) Flower - Lineart - STEM STICKS (idk what to call it) - and that’s it!

(2) Crocus (outward, left and right flowers)  - I have the full process of this, so here it is:

(2.1) FLOWER (DRAFT)- I made sure to do a rough outline of the shape so I could have an idea of what I was doing, and make sure the flower was proportionate to the track cover.

(2.2) FLOWER (LINEART) - This is where I drew the lineart and added detail for the petals and their design (at the same time). 

(2.3) STEM (DRAFT) - Even though I don’t have it in the art file, I believed I did it to make sure it was proportionate to size of the flower.

(2.4) STEM + LEAVES - This is when I did the lineart and added the details (at the same time). I then did the leaves as an additional design.

(2.5) MERGE LAYER OF STEM + FLOWER- and it’s finished!

(2) Cleaning up the Flowers:

The cleanup took the longest, since you have to erase the details of the flowers that was overlapped. Took the longest out of the 12 hours.

(2.1) Agapanthus:

(2.1.1) AGAPANTHUS - MIDDLE OF PAINTING/CENTRE (one touching Vil’s face) 

(2.1.2) AGAPANTHUS - MIDDLE/CENTRE: LEFT (touching Vil’s left shoulder)

(2.1.3) AGAPANTHUS - MIDDLE/CENTRE: RIGHT (touching Vil’s right shoulder)

(2.1.4) AGAPANTHUS - BOTTOM OF PAINTING: LEFT 

(2.1.5) AGAPANTHUS - BOTTOM OF PAINTING: RIGHT

(2.2) Crocus: 

(2.2.1) CROCUS - TOP LEFT

(2.2.2) CROCUS - TOP RIGHT

(2.2.3) CROCUS - BOTTOM LEFT

(2.2.4) BOTTOM RIGHT 

Step Two (3): Rough Lineart + Cleanup (Upper Body)

As usual, I love the lineart more than the final product (˶′◡‵˶). Especially this lineart - it’s rather mesmerizing to me!

Even Vil without colour looks absolutely beautiful...I love him (I’m starting to stan him (kind of))

But anyways! Here is the order I did the body in:

(1) Head (already completed by then)

(2) Neck 

(3) Neckish Shoulders (I don’t know what to call them - his toned necked muscles??? But it’s located around his neck)

*(4) Shoulders

*(5) Lower Body

*(6) Golden Details + Corset!

*For Number 4, I had to do multiple attempts because the shoulders weren’t proportionate to his body. I remembering 2 - 4 layers before choosing a final rough draft to work with.

As for Number 5, I also had to do multiple attempts as well because the original rough draft was not proportionate with the pose above. I did two rough drafts (I believe), but I don’t think I used them - I worked with the layer that looked the best. 

For Number 6, the golden details were originally in black, but I used the Fill Tool and a bit of erasing and adding to give the final look above. I would say cleanup was the hardest thing for the details, since it heavily overlapped the Agapanthuses and Crocuses...

<>

Thank you for reading this whole post! A Part 2 will come out in the next few days, so please stay tuned.

ALSO THE CLEANUP FOR ME SUCKED LOLOLOL. I CAN REMEMBER THE PAIN  (◎ܫ◎  ◎ܫ◎ ◎ܫ◎ ◎ܫ◎ ◎ܫ◎ ◎ܫ◎ ◎ܫ◎)-

Have a wonderful day you guys! :D!

[normal-thoughts-official]

Autistic Magnus headcanons

ok so i got this big submission on autistic magnus which i absolutely love and i ended up breaking it down into parts so i would remember to address it all so uh, here we go. this is long lmao

submission made by @hasenfu

oof this got long lol

before i forget: i always saw Magnus as autistic. (or rather there was a post how Alec is obv autistic but Magnus could be, too?? address that?!?!) so i thought about it and… i guess he’s had longer to adapt and do smaller fidgets, unnoticeable, more healthy -if he allows himself to do such- and other things idk. i took a break of the show+fandom shortly after and never came back to the thought much.

it was mostly being hyposensitive to pressure, which is why he has those tight vests or flowy shirts with heavy necklaces and his array of rings. (definitely a hug person and should own a weighted blanket)

but also, opposed to this, being hypersensitive to touch, so all his shirts and his bedsheets are silk. (weighted blanket can go on top or be a spell)

that truly makes so much sense to me tbh like i’ve always envisioned magnus that way as well, especially the hyposensitive to pressure part. especially considering that at the point of show canon he’s so touch starved? like he’s been keeping away from most people and kinda trying to hide and i think that only added to that. i definitely agree with what you said about the vests/corsets:

you might have a full inbox once this is done lol # idk who figured this out first but one of Magnus/Raphael found out about vests, maybe Magnus wore corsets first (yes even as cis/amab demiman/gnc cis man, people wore corsets because fashion) and then opted for vests. or Raphael wore them first because Business Man and Important Stuff and told Magnus to stop wearing flowy shit with a million necklaces and just wear tight clothing like Proper Human Beings. amazing word count is full again.

(also don’t worry i’m well aware that cis men used to wear corsets lmao i even have an old post about it lying somewhere. not that i envision magnus as a cis man but anyway) and also want to add: tight pants. like the pants he wears are always slim fit and i think that has a lot to do with that too? just feeling grounded by the pressure, like he’s more steady in his steps. especially when he’s wearing the silky shirts and etc because those have barely any pressure (esp the open shirts and stuff. i mean obviously like you said the necklaces help make up for that, but like. it’s not enough imho) 

but also just like, nothing is as good as the good olde hugs tbh. i mean obviously the clothes are good and help him function and not have meltdowns or feel overwhelmed (because he’s had a lot of time to prevent having meltdowns, and tbh probably uses unhealthy tactics to avoid that) and he isn’t comfortable with just anyone touching him (we know that very well. also invasion of space not safe invasion of space not safe invasion of space not safe-) but the people he trusts? somehow they always feel right

i love magnus and the immortal squad being into cuddle piles, particularly magnus&raphael (who’s also hyposensitive to pressure, plus he’s a latino immigrant so he’s used to quite a lot of casual touching, but once he got to the US that was suddenly Not Allowed anymore and god that must have fucked him up so much, the cultural shock mixed in with the hyposensitivity and then he lost his whole support network on top of that. like he feels absolutely smothered by the lack of pressure all the time and it makes his skin prickle and he wants to just. scratch it off just to get some relief from the constant feeling of deprivation. and magnus of course feels a similar way, since from what i looked up quickly indonesian people are also used to overcrowded spaces and casual touching, plus again, touch starved) 

like they’re both. kind of just functioning with this constant feeling of emptiness all around them, and they can’t really afford to be as touchy as they’d like because they’d be looked down on because of that, especially as downworlders, moc, etc. but when they’re in magnus’ loft and they’re alone? cuddling all the time. constant cuddling. not a single second goes by cuddleless. legs entangled, weight blanket over them, they might switch positions a lot because they might get fidgety - especially magnus, i feel like he needs to stim and etc a lot more than Raphael does - so at one second they’re lying down, the next they’re sitting, raphael is on top of magnus, magnus is on top of raphael, they’re side by side, only their legs are intertwined, raphael is lying across magnus….. it just keeps going and after like years of doing this they just do it effortlessly? 

one of my exes called this “dynamic cuddling” cuz yeah he was a huge cuddler but also kinda fidgety and so was i and most of his other partners (i Cannot lie in the same position for a long time which is why im usually not big on cuddling, and also prefer to be the big spoon) and i definitely see it for them. just, every time one of them (again, usually magnus) moves the other moves along and they’re just adjusting to a new position together, instead of the awkward “person A starts to move so person B waits and then they do a little adjustment afterwards” thing. ragnor in particular is appalled (especially since you know, british, so used to No casual touching whatsoever, also he clearly gets overwhelmed easily considering how isolated he lives, oh look at me casually throwing in autistic ragnor lmao i need to calm tf down) at how easily they do it but that’s just years of practice, knowing each other very well, and having very similar sensory issues for you

the one downside is that since they’re too similar they both want to like, be the little spoon diahdsiah so that’s why weighted blanket is a must, even if obviously they switch - magnus is perfect for raphael because he’s bigger and taller so he can envelop him pretty easily and cover like His Whole Back and just really crowd him in the best possible way? obviously that means that raphael being small is not as good for magnus but he can be in like fetal position and hug his knees and have raphael spoon him that way, and there’s the added Compression (?) of that. plus raphael always runs his hands over magnus’ arms particularly and that adds to the good pressure and feeling. he also definitely likes playing with magnus’ hair, which magnus is delighted by (btw it’s a huge sign of closeness in indonesian culture). the scalp is sensitive, okay. it’s perfect

with alec it’s perfect for magnus because i see alec as the opposite, he does not like a lot of pressure and particularly having things on his back (he needs to be able to Move) so he likes being the big spoon. also he’s one of the few ppl who’s taller than magnus and can envelop him perfectly, just like magnus does raphael 

also going briefly back to the vests thing, i really like the idea that it was raphael’s suggestion for some reason? i mean i kind of hc that magnus has had a huge influence on raphael’s style, but i also like it as the other way around. i especially like raphael helping magnus out with Autistic Problems™ because like you said magnus has had a lot of time to learn how to cope and hide his traits in order to be taken seriously, but he’s definitely foregone his own comfort in that proccess, and probably has a few coping mechanisms that aren’t really healthy. whereas raphael has a different perspective and grew up with a supportive family when it comes to that (i particularly hc rosa as being a great support in that sense, not letting anyone give him shit, giving him hugs when he needed, keeping people away when he didn’t want to be touched, speaking for him when he went nonverbal, etc) so he has a lot of better mechanisms. and i really dig him teaching those to magnus and helping him find better alternatives. like magnus knows about vests, has used corsets in that way before, why tf didn’t he think of that? because he’s used to ignoring his own needs :) but raphael helps him find good vests that make him feel, like, perfectly hugged and grounded and it’s Very Good. they probably share a lot during the time when raphael lives with him, since magnus can just magically adjust them anyway

plus other things such as not caring if magnus stims, and whatnot

i also think that he sometimes uses magic to handle the hyposensitivity problem, cause i mean, why not? especially when he’s in the flowy open shirts and whatnot, cuz again, like, the necklaces are good and they help a lot but they are Not Good Enough. but magic can make him feel more pressure and help him out with that, he can spell himself to have this kind of… constriction? that he likes. plus his magic kind of takes care of him on its own so i can definitely see it like, enhancing his sensitivity when he needs it, running over his arms and torso to keep him grounded, and whatnot. very useful, especially because he can do that unnoticed

that’s only what i had to say on hyposensitivity to pressure dear lord someone help me daiojdsoadjasodjadijaidoaj 

onto hypersensitivity to textures! again strongly agree. i kind of headcanon that all of magnus’ clothes are lined with silk underneath because they always look just a little stuffy when they aren’t silky and again it’s clearly his favorite texture - for his sheets, his shirts, just everything he can is silky. i know he can probably magick them up but i like to think he has a tailor tbh, maybe some other old warlock who never really wanted to give up that work? idk it sounds more authentic and even connected to his roots this way so i like to headcanon that. anyway yeah silk everywhere and all the way. pretty much every other texture other than that and the People He Likes is kinda overwhelming for him, imo. which can be a Huge Problem and is probably connected to why he hates people he doesn’t like getting into his personal space - he’s perfected the personal space distancing so he’s kept away from the Bad Textures and anyone getting into it uninvited is definitely unwelcome and perceived as a threat to his safety and wellbeing - and effectively is

same goes for jewelry, like, he pretty much only wears silver stuff? i think it’s his preferred texture as well, which is why we don’t see him wearing a lot of different things. that might also be related to the thing you said about colors:

maybe being hypersensitive to colours/visual influence but this might be a jab at smol book!magnus with his neon leggings and crop tops. but all his surroundings are either dark: dark red, dark blue, or black, or medium brown (wood) or smallll golden accents. nothing harsh.

like golden can be too much visually and non-metal textures aren’t really welcome. this is also related to the pressure thing - metal is great for weight, whereas every other accessory material is Not - but texture also plays a good part

(also ur so valid for wanting to jab @ book magnus tbh lmao i don’t acknowledge that bitch)

but i could see him hyperfocusing on translations. oof idk i haven’t interacted with canon in months or maybe years. i’ve mostly thought about his stims. like also the scratching on paper, his tai chi exercises, making/drinking tea, brewing potions.

i also dig that? i think most of what we’ve seen in Genius Magnus Bane is related to that in some capacity - being his hyperfocus/hyperfixation/special interest. like the portal thing? definitely a result of him hyperfixating. and he just goes on and on, which is why he isn’t particularly known for like, One Area He Expertises On (okay i do realize this is more ADHD than autism but look he’s been alive for centuries okay his special interests are gonna pile up) but rather a lot of very specific things that he knows a lot about and that end up broaching a thousand different and wildly unrelated topics

and whenever he’s working on a magical thing, it’s just- hyperfocus all the way, baby. sometimes when he needs a distraction or is feeling overwhelmed he just goes straight to brewing because it’s guaranteed hyperfocus and like, silence in his head, you know? and he can just get away from whatever’s overwhelming/upsetting him for a while. not always healthy to do, but. still a thing that he does. translating, brewing potions, summoning things, even tracking - it immediately takes his undivided attention and suddenly he looks up and realizes that ah yes, he is in a place and has surroundings, and has a name lmao. even if it’s something like tracking which is really quick, while he’s at it he doesn’t think about absolutely anything else. then he kind of has to blink after a few seconds and remember why he was doing it in the first place lmao

this is probably deeply intertwined with his magic - like it is related to how he interacts and perceives the world, so when he’s using it, he’s effectively channeling all of his attention into one of his senses, and directing it to a single specific purpose. it’s like inhaling deeply. everything else shuts down and he’s just focused and directed into this action, and then that mixes up with autism/ADHD and you’ve got guaranteed hyperfocus. it can be both good and bad, but it’s definitely grounding and something that helps him cope with a lot of things - like, sensorial overload? just feeling overwhelmed in general? too angry or tired? needing a distraction. magic time! even if it’s just making a small ball of light, it definitely helps him focus a lot

which of course leads up to stimming! which you already mentioned up there and also in here

(obv he stimmt with his rings and ear piece thingy all the time because it cool. i don’t think he’d disturb the necklaces because they make up for not wearing a vest so playing with them would do not enough good to make up for the loss of pressure)

again completely agree with the necklace thing, he’s never really seen playing with those, but the earpieces/earlobes/rings? hoo boy. all the damn time, definitely a good way to stim. plus yeah, magic like i just said, but not only in the sense of hyperfocusing on purpose, but also that he just stims magically? like keeps making sparks with his fingers, or making and reshaping a ball like we’ve seen him do in that scene where him and alec fight in s2, some light hand twisting that comes mostly in the form of an almost imperceptible rub of his fingers together, did i mention random sparks? or just having like, invisible tendons of magic running over his arms, focusing on how they feel and making them keep twisting over him like a snake or something? dadiahias idk if i can describe that very well but you know what i mean, it’s just wrapped around his arm and moving and he’s stimming that way, focusing on its motions (plus again good pressure!) and whatnot

i also think he clicks his tongue to make up for rarely ever verbally stimming, but sometimes he can verbally stim with like specific spells that feel good on the tongue when he’s alone - it takes him centuries to ever allow himself to do that one in front of anyone, even if it’s pretty innocuous

I’m very interested in reading more on your posts and how Magnus is ADHD in things that don’t overlap with either ASD or (c-?)PTSD!

doijadoadsoaj and now that i’ve written this huge ass disconnected manifesto on a bunch of shit i realize that that was your question all along. great great great. this is fine

if you’re interested in ADHD magnus as a whole i definitely recommend reading @thesorrowoflizards‘s fantastic ADHD Magnus Manifesto which already features a lot of my headcanons anyway daoisjdaojdsaoi also i have both an adhd magnus tag and a general meta as well as a magnus meta tag (shut up i like keeping things organized okay) so you can read more stuff ive written on/that includes the subject if you want. but anyway! let me scramble up some particular headcanons out of my little peanut brain

ok i guess i can start with what i said about him having like, a lot of expertise on a bunch of unrelated topics that ends up on him having a curriculum that’s like. invented the portal, fluent in 14th century albanian, specialist in rattlesnake venom, healing magic, and endocrinology, knows how to build one (1) highly specific model of plane, PHD in the javanese herbal flora and a master’s in wormholes… and it just keeps going lmao 

i kind of envision magnus having the type of adhd where his hyperfixations last a long time and are usually related to like, Solving A Problem or Figuring Out Something - take the portal for example. he set his mind to it, right, he wants to create teleportion! and he’s gonna hyperfocus on that and learn everything there is to learn until he figures out how to do that, and then he blinks and 10 years have passed and he’s just, like, been doing that. but now that it’s done, great! onto the next topic! and it begins again daoids

i mean over time he probably got better at managing hyperfixations and still like functioning, especially because you know, as high warlock he can’t go around getting distracted and immersed in whatever the fuck he finds fitting, but that’s definitely his natural state, so to speak. he’s naturaly curious and he likes to create and alter the world around him, so he’s drawn to sciences and inventions, but pretty much everything inside that is fair game. also languages! they are useful, especially but not just for a warlock, and uncover so much about a culture and their worldview. i can definitely see him hyperfixating on translations and languages and getting absolutely immersed in those, not stopping studying until he’s absolutely fluent, even if only in a specific dialect from a specific time lmao. it’s not like it’s a problem because as a warlock he reads a lot of ancient texts. and understanding the language means understanding the exact workings of whatever spell he’s using, so again, very useful! 

also like, this is 100% projection, but jesus, time blindness. like i’m time blind as all fuck i’m the time blindest bitch i know it’s incredible, and i hc magnus as having a huge problem with that. and as an immortal, it only gets trickier. was this yesterday? was it in the 18th century? who knows! certainly not him. and after a while of immortality your notion of time is bound to get thwarped, in the same way that a year seemed like a long time when i was a kid and seems like nothing to current me - the more you live, the shorter any length of time seems to last. so he’s going to be like “this was two weeks ago” when in reality it was in the 30s. it might get him some pretty bad shocks, too, like for instance when one of his cats dies of old age - they already live so little, and the more time passes, the less that seems to be to magnus. and he might even feel guilty over that, like, i didn’t even enjoy that cat’s life, it felt to me like i found them yesterday, and now they’re gone, what kind of person am i 

that’s not true of course, he’s always taken care of his cats wonderfully, but it might feel that way for him sometimes, feel like he barely registered they were there and it all passed so quickly even if that’s not really what happened 

and sometimes panicking, like, how long has it been since i met (mortal)? are they close to dying? how much time do we have? how long did i spend worrying about the portal instead of being with them? and just spiralling into anxiety because he can’t trust his own perception of time and it’s like, suddenly, he doesn’t know

not gonna think about magnus waking up in the middle of the night before alec becomes immortal worried that it’s been longer than he thinks, that he thinks it’s been a few years but it’s actually been decades, and what if he turns around and finds that alec is greying and dying and he’s going to lose him without even noticing? is this going to slip through his fingers before he notices, because magnus will never forgive himself if it does. haha yeah definitely not gonna think about that, nope. i’m fine

but also just stupider things with time blindness, like being like “oh wow, did that restaurant i liked close? has it really been this long since i’ve last been here?” “hm. it says here that this has been a residential building for the last 30 years.” “has it???” 

getting centuries mixed up, even if he has very obvious cues to figure out where something took place (like clothing and whatnot) but sometimes he doesn’t think of doing that and just spits out however long it feels like it has been (because like idk about other people but for me time blindness comes with a very clear sense of certainty? like i’ll be like i am absolutely, completely sure that this was a week ago. but then i look and it was two months ago or last year or when i was a kid) and it’s just wildly wrong

over time he learns to always do actual calculations in his head instead of trusting his gut so as to avoid embarrassment and even scorn - oh look i’m making myself sad again god damn it - and he becomes very quick at calculating and figuring it out from cues, like “ah this clothing is from the victorian era, this material wasn’t invented before (x year), i met this person on that year…. so it’s year x”. he kind of has annotations on that so he can keep up. he doesn’t know the years and dates because of his own memories, but from like, a history-studying standpoint lmao it’s a little wack but he manages

every once in a while tho, especially when he’s with alec or his friends, he slips up, and it’s funny. especially because alec has like. an annoyingly good memory, especially with dates, so he can say the exact date that they had a specific conversation without even thinking. so magnus will be like “alexander remember last week when you made me soto ayam?” and alec will give him that shit eating grin and be like “the last time i made you soto ayam was 3 months and 12 days ago” and magnus is just like UGGGHHH and alec makes fun of him for it lmao 

but hey at least they can make up for each other’s weaknesses when it comes to that duahsda but it’s frustrating because it’s one thing that alec is effortlessly good at while magnus is very bad at, and there aren’t a lot of these - especially since magnus has had so much time and so many interests, he’s way more likely to know his way and be good with something than alec, who’s been raised in a military society where interests of any kind weren’t welcome. so it’s frustrating and by god is alec smug about it

and okay i think that’s big enough for now doaijdsaodaj i apologize for the huge incoherent ramble and also for taking so long to reply, i’m just Like This. i hope you liked my answer anyway doauhdaihdsa and thank you again for this wonderful submission, few things make me happier than getting lengthy headcanons shared with me :)