#and i will tell you more in my essay so idk when but honestly i hope i'll be able to write it tomorrow
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HOW WAS IN THE HEIGHTS!?!?!??!!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!??!
also im back <3
i have so many things to say and i'm not going to say anything now, because i have to collect my thoughts first. let me just say this will be the longest essay you've ever seen.
#i am speechless now#too many emotions at once but i know you all are wondering if i liked it so spoiler here: i loved it more than i thought i would#and i will tell you more in my essay so idk when but honestly i hope i'll be able to write it tomorrow#also i'm so happy you are back cause i missed you <3#(also i'm gonna tag this as my countdown because i want all those posts in one place)#i saved every letter you wrote me*#it won't be long now*
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A bit lonely.
Stanley and the bad bitch he pulled by being a loser. Imagine having a hot babe deform reality just to be together with you because he sensed you were feeling lonely without him. [WHEN IS IT MY TURN?!]
It's funny because with the general vibe of their AU, it would make sense for him to show up in the most flashy but also unnerving way possible. The Narrator's [Black's] arrival has to grab people's eyes since attention and views are what he's all about.
I wasn't sure what type of characterization they had so I just played it safe and [tried to] draw how my characters would respond instead of blindly guessing how the others would talk or act around each other. [My Stanley is antisocial and an anxiety-ridden freak.]
Also, I've been wondering what their height differences actually were when I saw my Stanley have to look up at Marionette's Narrator [since this guy is pretty damn tall] so I did a bit of digging and this was what I found.
Here's one for the Narrators also.
I had a lot of fun making this by the way. It's been a while since I've participated in any Reblog Chains that involved character interactions and making comics, so it's a real throwback to when I first started posting TSP art in 2023.
Extra art~ I love these two [I am not normal for them.]
@marionette-j2x @beartitled @insomniphic
[more rambling underneath]
Tumblr has a tag limit and it grates my nerves to no end to know that I cant ramble as much as I'd like to
So I'll be here. Just talking about my own characters since I want to, but also because I'd LOVE to hear about your own characters too tbh, I'm so interested in them [I love reading about other people's characters and stuff, even if they're not fully fleshed out yet]
Stanley here is an absolute social shutoff teehee, but he does talk back when talked to. His responses usually leave no openings to continue the conversation though. He's the type of guy to stay on the corner and watch everyone else.
As for the Narrator [Black] he's a bit strange. He's proper in public, but he doesn't think the other people are special [or not as special as he is at least]. He just doesn't care to be honest, he keeps to himself [along with Stanley] and that's it. It's a miracle for Stanley to have even pulled somebody like Black considering their personalities are the type to clash with one another. [They love each other though, genuinely. Despite how deranged they can be towards each other at times.]
Also, 4th wall breaking in action!!!!!!!!!!!
Black didn't want to interrupt this comic since it was made for Stanley but after the other three came in he lost reservations and came in as well.
These two would probably just stay in their own spot [somewhere quiet and more alone]. This place is a bit too crowded for their liking. But I would be very happy to jump on any opportunity to make my guys interact with any of yours!!!!! Don't be afraid to throw a bone [prompt] for me to bite on, okay?
[Oh no, I just realized Black looks like he has boobs on the last picture. He DOES NOT have boobs!! Sorry man boob enjoyers, it's the lighting that made it look that way wuwuwu...]
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Stanley hug request from @marionette-j2x!
A response from this previous post!
Ft. @blackkatdraws’ Stanley
#I hope you didn't mind me rambling#I'm just happy#wow I didnt realize I drew a lot#“a lot”#to be honest I wasnt so keen on adding Narrators into the reblog chain [lighthearted] since it was started for Stanleys#and Stanley reblog chains are something that rarely ever get traction or paid attention to#nevermind developing like this#but I still enjoyed nonetheless [as you can probably tell from the amount of art I made]#my Stanley is so stupid I love him#in case my entire account thats filled with his drawings doesnt point that out already#gay thoughts overtook my brain when I started to make a response HAHAHA#i drew Stanley and thought about adding Narrator [Black] and my brain went dopamine overload#“hhiihwagh ghewgahhg wife coming to visit his hubbbyy”#BTW Insomni's Narrator [Narry] has beef with Black but that's gonna take so long to explain LMAOOO#nice guy that's kind to everyone but heavily dislikes this ONE GUY in particular#and my Narrator [Black] just doesnt care#excuse me for this essay#I love to talk a bit too much about these things#overexplaining and just fawning in general is something I tend to do a lot#I'm sorry if I wasnt able to draw any of your guys as much as I wouldve loved to#honestly I wasnt sure about their characterization [something I'm WAY TOO unnecessarily attentive towards]#so I just stayed in my own line just in case [but in exchange I couldnt draw any of them as much as I'd hoped]#I find it a funny idea and a bit interesting to know how your guys would react towards my own guys actually#He mostly keeps to himself but Black tends to do a lot of stuff that may be considered paranormal or unusual#liikkeee twisting reality a bit with the intent to scare the observing party? idk it's just a thing he likes to do#might be because its fun but mostly just to appear more intimidating towards others#hes a prideful pretty thing#and yet he just seems to want to do nothing more than to crumble in Stanley's arms everytime he's near#[Stanley wants to do the same of course]#mine 💗
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okay unhinged essay about ragatha probably #1 idk i don't think this is all of my thoughts but here's what i could actually put down
i think the most surprising thing for me Personally is getting a lot of my interpretations of ragatha correct ? like . the thing that almost destroyed my motivation for this blog is the fear that my unhinged overanalyzation of her mannerisms in the pilot were Wrong - i actually thought about canceling everything when i was off from canon - but now ... yeah i'm not doing that
i guess it's just that we had so little of her in the first episode that i thought i was Manifesting her issues but Nope she really is this much of a Loser
first of all ! i suspected that she has low self-esteem but Goodness Gracious !! i didn't expect it to be Actually almost non-existent ?? like i thought i was Exaggerating for this blog but no , no person with a normal amount of self-esteem would Warp an incident so much in their head that they somehow believe something going wrong is Their Fault .
like she's so focused on pomni the entire episode because she Genuinely believes that the fiasco in the first day was her fault ( even though IT WASN'T , but she's really that used to quickly blaming herself ) and wants to make it up to her . but of course pomni is still adjusting and is Overwhelmed by everything ( which is understandable ) so she's not really in the mood for ragatha's bullshit
but with how ragatha reacts and what she subsequently tells kinger - she read those more as ' i do not like you ' than ' i am too fatigued to care about anything right now ' which is such a Large leap , but considering she was the one who Apologized to pomni for giving her a stressful first day ( which was COMPLETELY out of her control , ) it makes sense that she assumes that pomni has something against her - which was not helped by how none of ragatha's attempts of starting a friendship were reciprocated
i do understand why she would Think it's her fault - as pomni's a newcomer and More Stress is the last thing she needs , especially in her first day - but ' oh she doesn't like me ' is still Such a hasty conclusion that someone who already ... Doesn't Like Themself would jump to .
of course i can't not talk about the potential history between her and kinger . through their dialogue you can tell that ragatha's one of those people that took a batshit long time to truly adjust to the circus - which has a lot of interesting implications . with how she seems to understand the process of finding an exit in episode 1 , it explains a lot . my girl was so Not well when she entered the circus .
honestly it's just nice seeing that ragatha at least has Some support despite her being the one who holds everything together - it makes the ending impactful in my opinion ; they do really care for each other and will be saddened if one of them is gone .
also of course she asked if everyone's alright despite having a cleaver to the head ...
something that also has been nagging me for a long time is how much she always gets the short end of the stick . like , literally every time she's on screen , she Has To Get Harmed in some way . i would brush this off as slapstick when her official pin doesn't have her HAVING A KNIFE TO THE CHEST ???
Maybe it's just slapstick . maybe with her having parallels to kaufmo considering how he's said to be a goofy toxic positivity type guy like ragatha and is the one that has abstracted thus far is just a coincidence and doesn't speak levels to what might become inevitable as the series goes on ,
#[ ooc ]#[ ESSAY WARNING ]#tadc#the amazing digital circus#tadc spoilers#the amazing digital circus spoilers#tadc ragatha#||#couldn't find a way to fit this into the post but#something about her just screams ' abandonment issues ' and i don't think i have enough evidence to prove it but . the feeling's there
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i have been holding space for the Agatha finale (i’m in queer media) and am pleased to report that my feelings about it have shifted quite significantly. follow me, my friends, to a more or less coherent, very long text post at the end
primary thing: this show is very much about motherhood. idk why that didn’t totally register for me in the first half given how often they mentioned Nicky, but realizing this changed my analysis a ton. Billy doesn’t just remind Agatha of Nicky — Agatha loves Billy like a son. (i know “like a son” is an oversimplification, but I’m sticking with it for this post.)
with that, my thoughts on Agatha’s arc almost completely flipped. when Rio shows up in E8 and says she has to take Billy, Agatha is revisiting her deepest wound all over again. her reaction is harsh, but it’s not some long-simmering revenge plan or a calculated effort to hurt Rio. Agatha is literally just reacting to the fact that, after all of the almost-reconciliation, the love of her life is taking her son again. i think she was trying to get Rio to fight for her or to say the trade was too high a price and bend the rules. Agatha was trying to get Death to act only as her lover, and looks devastated when Rio actually walks away instead.
and so, when Agatha goes to the morgue trial and says that “sometimes, boys die,” she’s continuing that realization that Rio isn’t personally chasing her down and causing her grief. sometimes, death just… happens. and “out of Death, life” is largely about Agatha realizing that Rio did bend the rules for Nicky, but also doubles down on the Nicky and Billy parallels. both of Agatha’s sons were literally borne of Death and living on stolen time. loss is inevitable.
i think Agatha genuinely believed that Rio could have kept Nicky alive and chose not to. we know that Agatha blamed herself for Nicky dying (“the truth is too awful”). so Agatha, who was taught by her own mother that nobody would ever actually love her for who she is, probably thought that the love of her life just… didn’t love her as much as she thought she did. going back to E1, i think “you don’t have a heart” is equal parts about Nicky as it is about Agatha herself. her main takeaway is that everyone will betray her, even when they claim to love her, and so she hides behind power and a god awful reputation so that she can keep everyone at arm’s length and never get hurt again.
ALL OF THIS IS TO SAY: when Billy is about to die, Agatha almost retreats back into the version of herself she became after Nicky died, but she doesn’t. she turns around and faces the pain head-on.
and I want to take a second to appreciate how immensely hard that would be. Agatha spent centuries killing people so she could be powerful enough to stay numb. Agatha spent all of that time pushing away the love of her life, who still loves her, who still sees her fully, and who Agatha is clearly still desperate to return to. Agatha realizes, probably to absurd amounts of despair, that she was wrong about all of it. and she still turns around.
it’s not about Agatha randomly sacrificing herself for a last minute villain kind-of-redemption. it’s about Agatha breaking the cycle she’s trapped herself in for an unfathomably long time, admitting that she knows Rio couldn’t change the outcome, and acknowledging that, yeah, she actually does love this kid.
and honestly?? i don’t think Agatha becoming a ghost counts as killing her. she’s literally still around, doing stuff, picking up brooches (👀 Rio wya), and getting a second chance at… not motherhood, exactly, but caring for a child. (and a queer child! and the idea of Agatha, who has been queer since the *1600s*, getting to tell this gay kid over and over again that there’s nothing innately wrong with him makes me actually sob.)
HOWEVER! i maintain some criticisms. i think Jen deserved to have an actual fight with the doctor who bound her. (the oops! it was Agatha All Along twist was… complicated. i have mixed feelings. essay for another day, but i wanted Jen to have rage time that everyone was just cheering for.)
i needed Death lore. how is she physically with Agatha so often if, as Agatha states, 120 people die every minute? is she Death the cosmic entity, or are green witches sort of responsible for decay on earth?
some of the plot elements were severely under-developed, and frustratingly, the vast majority of the underdeveloped plotlines had to do with Agatha/Rio’s romantic relationship, Agatha’s mother, and Agatha’s reasons for killing people. (the fact that they said she’s a siphon in interviews and not once on the show will never stop baffling me lmao.) i find it very frustrating that a LARGE chunk of the underdeveloped stuff relates back to Agatha’s queerness in some way.
however… i am willing to be generous about some of that, because i find it difficult to believe that this *extremely queer* creative team actually just disregarded major queer plot elements. i am far more inclined to believe that they were operating under a hostile corporation and pushing as far as they could, and in that case, they did a fucking phenomenal job.
i genuinely think that the way they landed the show opens the door for them to… dare I say it? … give Agatha/Rio a happy ending?? ghost Agatha literally need only show up to Rio’s house or cave or dimension or whatever and be like “heyyyyy, yeah that kiss was forgiveness and also i’m solid enough to use my hands now” and it would be believable. the fact that it would take them only 15 seconds to give us two fucked up lesbians having their version of happily ever after is actually pretty cool
anyway, this is an abridged summary of how my feelings abt the Agatha All Along finale went from like a 4/10 rating to an 8/10.
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I’ve been seeing some discourse around twitter about the blue lock boys and whether they’d be a loyal bf or not 😭 Curious to know who do you think would be more inclined to cheat or who just wouldn’t at all!!!
I saw someone say sae would 100% cheat like whattt I feel like he wouldn’t even bother looking at anyone else if he already has someone (Cuz I mean dating him would likely mean you actually mean something to him) but I digress
ok anon you had me pulling up a whole argumentative essay here cus WHO TF SAID SAE WOULD 100% CHEAT??? 😔 that mischaracterization is so painfully inaccurate. twitter really took the whole emotionally unavailable itoshi archetype and ran with it. let me just clear the air here because my man deserves some explanation.
sae itoshi would not cheat. as in capital N and capital O. he took nearly an entire decade off his life just to work on his own issues and finally form a functional and healthy relationship with another human being. and you're telling me he's just going to let all that wash down the drain for someone else? 😒 twitter logic really be showing its illogical side here. apparently a man can be loyal to a professional sports career for eighteen years, but he can't be loyal to his significant other.
i think this misunderstanding probably happened cus of shidou. people read the manga and saw that sae dropped rin for a bug-eyed freak and automatically assumed he was disloyal. 😑 let me just say two things here:
(1) sae and shidou's relationship is strictly professional. imagine being stuck in an god awful corporate office with coworkers who bore you with their weaponized incompetence and a boss who annoys the living shit out of you. and then one day, the company hires a new recruit who is probably the most unhinged and debauched creature known to man. you're probably left wondering how he even got hired in the first place. but then you find out...he's useful. he takes risks and gets a high return on what he invests. it's impulsive and stupid, really. but at least it's unconventional and outside-the-box. he has your interest piqued. that's basically sae and shidou in a nutshell.
(2) just because sae gave shidou his number after the u-20 game does NOT mean he would do the same to any other person who would try to encroach on your relationship. and let's be real here. sae would get one text from shidou and block his contact.
anyways, here is my analysis on the bllk boys in general. introducing the anti-cheating to pro-cheating spectrum:
(A) cannot cheat under any circumstance (as in they already hate the fact that they live on a planet with 8.1 billion other people who are not you):
itoshi brothers (atp they don't even have the physical or mental capacity to entertain a third party), ness, reo
(B) cannot cheat due to physical incapability (literally cannot pull anyone within a five-meter radius to cheat with):
ego, igarashi, raichi, bachira (not that he's in any way unattractive...it's just...i feel like he would purposefully act weird to drive off people who aren't you)
(C) could not cheat (basically option A and B but less problematic version)
yukimiya, barou, kunigami, noa, loki, gagamaru, chigiri, niko, hiori, karasu (baby boy literally felt inferior cus his crush was the cutest in his class), kurona (head empty, just you)
(D) would not cheat (on you but everyone else is not included)
isagi (unintentionally a homewrecker to others but would never let anyone homewreck his relationship with you), leonardo (idk why but i just don't trust him entirely)
(E) could cheat (depends on what they get out of it):
kaiser, shidou (honestly what did you expect when you willingly dated a blonde man...)
(F) would cheat (either proven by canon or they accidentally fucked up somehow):
otoya, oliver, nagi
#asks#blue lock#bllk#bllk fluff#rin itoshi#isagi yoichi#itoshi rin#shidou ryusei#hiori yo#barou shouei#nagi seishiro#reo mikage#oliver aiku#otoya eita#noel noa#leonardo luna#itoshi sae#bllk shidou#michael kaiser#alexis ness#karasu tabito#kurona ranze#yoichi isagi#yukimiya kenyu#chigiri hyoma#niko ikki#gagamaru gin#loki#kunigami rensuke#bachira meguru
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do you mean twilight princess, in which she held a sword exactly once in a flashback and pretty much immediately dropped it in surrender? or wind waker, where she forgets how to use a sword the second she turns into princess zelda until literally the final battle 🤔? and i genuinely can't think of whatever other time you're referring to that she apparently uses a sword. spirit tracks? ok i'll give you that one, i guess, because phantom zelda is pretty badass, but other than that.........??
"ummm actually it's a good thing that zelda plays differently from link, because link has the triforce of courage so of course he fights and uses swords! meanwhile zelda has the triforce of wisdom, so obviously she's going to find more clever ways to solve her problems teehee ;)" hey did you guys know you can still be excited for the game while also acknowledging it's pretty fucking shitty of nintendo to act like zelda is incapable of picking up a sword in a mainline game.
#i'm sorry if this response seems condescending or rude but this is just a very flimsy argument.#like....you know what i meant. nintendo acts like she's incapable of fighting outside a very scant few circumstances & use the#“well she wouldn't solve her problems like that” or “but if she's the main character what would link be doing haha” as an excuse.#also before anybody tries to use it as a gotcha yes i know she does get to use the bow of light in a few games as well#(in all 3 games mentioned funnily enough). which is cool! i think the bow of light is awesome and an iconic weapon of hers#(and yes i think of it as *her* weapon. which is why i'm so fond of the idea of a bow and arrow being her main weapon of choice in the same#way a sword is link's). but those times are few and far between and it's always only to play a supporting role to link.#which obviously works from a gameplay standpoint since in those cases we're playing as link and thus would literally have nothing to do if#she DID do all the fighting. but the fact she still doesn't get to fight in a game she's literally headlining????#idk it's just not a great look to me. combat has ALWAYS been a very core part of the loz series from the very beginning & on one hand yeah#think it's cool they're trying to branch out & experiment with different gameplay styles. but idk it just leaves a bitter taste in my mouth#(especially because i can already tell the whole ~just throw shit at enemies~ thing is going to get very annoying very fast for me lmao)#...HOWEVER. i do also acknowledge that overall we actually know very little about the game so far. only what we saw in the reveal trailer.#so obviously i'll withhold final judgement until i play for myself. i'm just a little wary is all.#honestly i guess what i really take issue with is the loz fans acting like the decision to focus less on combat is somehow more#“in-character.” as if every iteration of zelda doesn't have her own distinct personality anyway? it would literally be so easy for them to#write a zelda who's eager to fight (even if only because it's to save link) while still keeping close to her core characteristic traits.#like. come on.#sigh. but anyway. sorry for the rant but it's just so upsetting that so many loz fans#(and this isn't aimed at the person in the screenshot. just in general) seem perfectly ok with the perpetual mistreatment of zelda#especially when they use the same tired arguments to justify it. i'm so over it but i'm also not going to discuss it further#as this literally took me 6 hours to write and i'm sick to death of having to think about this because honestly all of my thoughts#are far more nuanced than i care to convey in the tags of a tumblr post anyway.#...actually i'm kind of tempted to write a whole essay about this now. if nothing else it might help me sort out my thoughts a bit better.#lmk if any of you (assuming anybody's even made it this far lmfao) would be interested in seeing that ?#but yeah ok seriously i'll stop talking ...for now 😈#replies#send tweet
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𐙚 -DRAFT #1
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★ lazy miles1610 x reader fluff, slightly suggestive
idk bro i'm bored and there's no more miles1610 x reader fics ☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
miles had been staring at his blank paper for the last ten minutes. he was supposed to have been starting his english essay due monday, but he only managed the title and his name. "damn, i'm bored." miles muttered to himself, spinning around in his swivel chair. he threw his head back, sighing as he tried to find some interest in the dorm ceiling above him.
meanwhile, i was actually on the way to his room. i had just finished up all my due work, and i was in a cheery mood. i knocked gently at his door, waiting for a response. i didn't have to wait for anything past half of a second for miles to appear at the door. "hey, [ y/n ]!" he blurted out quickly, opening the door with superhuman speed. he wasn't even trying to hide how much he had been wanting you to visit. "hey babyyy," i greet him, leaning in for a short kiss as i held his face. he seemed to shiver at my touch, his ears heating up at the nickname i gave him. "s-so wassup? how you been?" he asked awkwardly, closing the door as i walked in. his arms looked as if he didn't know where to place them, and he was acting as if we hadn't been dating for the last seven months now. i chuckle gently at his attempt of being smooth. "nothin', i finished my work for the weekend and i wanted to see your stupid face." i quip, tilting my head teasingly while intertwining his hands with mine. his face lit up into a giant smile as soon as you started holding his hands. "aww, really? even though you see it literally every single day? that's nice," he said, jokingly trying to pretend he didn't love hearing those things from me. i could obviously tell he'd already gotten back to his sassy demeanor. "i'm sorry, for me that just translated to 'leave', so i guess i'll get goin'" i remark with the same unit of sassiness, letting go of his hands and turning towards the door with a smirk. that made him scoff, grabbing your hand and pulling you towards him. "stoppp, i was kidding. please don't go," he pleaded, rolling his eyes as he found himself once again begging me for something. "i'm dying of boredom, mami." he groaned, tugging me closer.
"maybe watch the tone then?" i tease, raising an eyebrow. "maybe stay and not act like a jerk?" he retorts mockingly, tilting his head down towards me. "cmonnn, i need attention," he whispered, squeezing my hands as if he would die if i didn't listen. he groaned in response, covering his face with his hands in defeat. "pleaseeeeeee, just five minutes," he whined, his words sounding more like a baby than anything, which made him cringe even more. "mmm... okay, i'm convinced," i announce, my smirk still plastered on my place. there was something so satisfying about seeing him like that. "c'mon, sit here." i mutter, crawling onto his bed and settling onto my knees to pat the space between me, and the pillow for him to sit at. i was glad i'd come over in just a tank top and sweatpants, so i didn't have to worry about anything else. miles grinned, quickly clambering onto the bed and settling into the spot i'd left for him. he seemed to greatly enjoy this position, loving how i felt on top of him. "damn, you're fine," he muttered under her breath, hesitantly settling his hands around my hips. he was quickly snapping back into his normal self. it sort of surprised me how fast he went from shy to turned on in a few minutes. "it seems like you are asking for a different kind of attention here, baby." i tease, shuffling closer as i laugh. "well, when you look so good, you have to expect it," he replied, a smirk plastered on his face as his eyes looked me up and down. he was back in his cocky little persona now, which was honestly what i wanted. "oh?" i hummed, trying not the laugh at the sudden switch in personality. i could clearly tell the way his face heated up at my change in tone, along with that same dorky smile. "where'd this come from? i thought you wanted to cuddle? now it's sounding like something else?" i tease, giggling.
"shut up, this is still cuddling. see?" he replied quietly, lifting his head up again to look into my eyes, "is this not a nice, peaceful cuddle?" he teased back with a smirk, his hands still wrapped around my hips. i could just feel the sarcasm in his tone.
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★ i might return to this later, i quit for now, lemme know if yall want more
#atsv#spiderverse#spiderman across the verse#miles morales#miles morales x you#earth 42 miles morales x reader#miles morales 1610#1610 miles morales#earth 1610 miles x you#earth 1610 miles x reader#earth 1610 miles morales x you#earth 1610 miles fluff
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Do you believe Brooklynn has feelings for Darius?
Hellooo, I really don't think she does! (who's surprised honestly?) No but fr I need to stop writing essays on this topic 😂 Thank god i'm an insomniac.
I know people are convinced she loves him back because she didn't *actually* reject him and instead said "I'm not really ready for..." but if you look closely at the sequence, the way they animated her body language and facial expressions is much more telling than her words (at least to me), and it led to me agreeing with Darius' recollection of this moment (she tried to be nice about it but it was clear she didn't feel the same).
Like, I don't see how anyone can see that and think she's in love 😭 THAT'S the face of love according to this fandom???? She looks horrified at the mere possibility that Darius could feel anything other than friendship towards her.
Also important to note that she started saying "I just don't think..." before changing her choice of words, and to me it's a clear sign she was about to reject him more directly, but couldn't do it, so instead she went for an answer that would spare his feelings.
And when you add the shot of her putting distance btw them by moving her feet away from him as if she suddenly felt uncomfortable with their proximity... Why would you physically recoil as the person you *supposedly* love confesses to you?
To me if the writers had wanted to indicate that deep down she wanted to be with Darius, but couldn't in this moment because it was too soon (as she said)/for Kenji's sake, they would have had her say the same thing, but have her body instinctively move closer to him as a physical manifestation of her "true feelings" (...which it is, but it moved away, you do the math).
Also the fact that right after that she still asks him to meet with her for her investigation. I don't know, I think that if she felt anything towards him she would have been as embarrassed/uncomfortable as him, but here she brushed it off as if it was nothing. She had no problem with the idea that she would see him later that day, as if to her there was nothing more to be said/this "incident"/chapter was closed.
I already talked about the look during the plane scene so I'm not going to do it again.
From a story standpoint, it would be really questionnable writing if she suddenly fell in love with someone a week after her partner of 6 years dumped her.
And I absolutely cannot see them throw the "she was in love with Darius while dating Kenji" excuse at us, like, that's straight up character assassination. I know they made Brook morally grey but you can't come back from that 😂. Also, it would go against what they showed in the two first seasons because she looked really in love with Kenji (how devastated she looked when he broke up, how happy they were on the video on her phone, how physically affectionate she was with him in episode 3, the picture of them in her secret apartment...).
And this.
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I didn't think my biggest evidence for Kenlynn would be some scribbles on a notebook, but oh well 😂
Like, one simply cannot explain this away. This was her attempt at telling them she was alive, and she only wrote to Kenji, not Darius. And it's not like she had to censore herself or to, idk, force herself to write to Kenji to keep up the appearances because those are only, as I said, scribbles on a paper, her raw feelings and thoughts, something she was never going to send anyway.
Like, if they want to make dinostar canon, why post that? Why not take this opportunity to add content/substance to the ship they *supposedly* want to make endgame? Having that letter addressed to Kenji only serves the purpose of showing us that Kenji's the one on her mind, because otherwise that was unnecessary. They could have had her write to the whole camp fam, but instead they decided to show us that she wanted to tell Kenji she was alive above everyone else, including Darius, the one who confessed to her right before her "death" and who Brooklynn most likely knew felt incredibly guilty for not showing up/for her death (Ronnie probably told her).
If she was in love with Darius she would have adressed the "letter" to him, I can't see any argument against that. Or maybe it's more that if she wasn't in love with Kenji anymore, she wouldn't have written to him, but to all of them.
Honestly, the most I can see them giving Dinostar as far as Brooklynn's feelings for Darius go is to have her admit that she used to have a little crush on him when they were on Nublar but that it completely disappeared once she started getting coser to Kenji. I have nothing to back up this theory, but I don't know, I thought that much wouldn't be too far fetched.
(oh, and I almost forgot but this goes without saying... pretty sure her getting attacked, alone at night, mauled by a dino and loosing her arm partly because he set her up would have killed any potential blooming feeling in her).
#why do I feel like I'm slowly becoming Kenlynn's spoke person#lmaoooo#I mean I think it's a mix of me loving Kenlynn and me loving to argue#pretty sure everyone can see that I love to argue because why the hell am I physically incapable of writing two lines replies#I can't with me#anyway#chaos theory#jwcc#jwct#kenji kon#brooklynn#camp cretaceous#darius bowman#yasmina fadoula#sammy gutierrez#jurassic world camp cretaceous#brooklynn jwcc#kenlynn#dinostar
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can u talk a bit more about working as a bibliographer? like what does that actually entail?
so the bibliography i worked at was affiliated with the major academic professional society of my subfield, and the society sponsors the bibliography as a kind of sister publication to their journal. this means 1) we were almost exclusively grant-funded, and 2) the staff positions at the bibliography go to grad students. there are jobs in bibliography and related information sciences that are not exclusive to academics/grad students, but i can't really tell you anything about them personally; i had this job as a graduate research assistant (ie this was what i did to get my paycheck for two years instead of TAing).
anyway the purpose of a bibliography like this that's affiliated with a journal or subfield is usually to aggregate data on what's published in that journal or subfield. ours was aimed at capturing the whole subfield. so, the bulk of the staff job is to comb through recent academic publications (journal articles & books) and pull anything that's topically relevant. we add the abstract and metadata to the bibliography (meaning basically a searchable database) and then we do subject tagging. this is the most fun part because you have to think about how knowledge is categorised and what's most useful to a user and whatnot.
so like let's say i'm entering an article from the journal of the history of psychiatry. i already pulled the metadata from the online journal listing and put it through zotero, which then talks to the bibliography's back end. i do the authority control (link it with the author's other publications in our bibliography, and with some external identity profile like viaf or orcid). i link it to the journal in our database and make sure it has the right date, page numbers, etc. this article is about philippe pinel, so its main category tag is probably 'psychiatry - 19th century'. then i aim for 5–10 additional subject tags, maybe 'france, metropolitan', 'psychiatric hospitals and institutions', 'therapy and therapeutic methods', 'philosophy of medicine', 'nosology and diagnosis', 'pitié-salpetrière hospice', etc.
once this is all entered, the article is searchable by any of its metadata, by going to the author's profile in our database, or by those subject and category tags. institutions (universities, libraries, hospitals, etc) all have their own authority controls too. you can browse the database by data, by subject tag, by searching keywords, etc; it also has a few visualisation tools that show strongly associated subject tags, histograms of a person's or publisher's history of publication, etc. this all means that things are more easily discoverable than they might be, and once you've found them you can also browse related things easily, or look at some provisional info on the state of publications in the field.
because this bibliography was affiliated with a journal, we also used to publish a yearly print edition with the entries published in the last year (this was satisfying to hold but honestly way less functional than the online database version lol) and we also published a special edition of bibliographic / historiographic essays on pandemics that i worked as managing editor for. idk how common this would be at other kinds of bibliographic job positions; we used the same publisher as the sister journal, so mostly all i had to do was correspond with people and deal with typesetting. anyway once that was published we also added those articles to the bibliography itself too.
anyway super fun job tbh, like a lot of it is data entry but haggling over subject tags was honestly enjoyable if you like that kind of thing. i lost the battle to add "total institutions" as a subject tag but won when i said we needed to revamp our system for entries dealing with weight management; as a result those subject tags are now clearer and more useful, and capture scientific discourses about both 'underweight' and 'overweight'. our best tag imo was "controversies and disputes", which was like a catch-all for any time there was some kind of haterism in the literature. it kind of changed how i view knowledge categorisation (like, the process; philosophy-of) and because we spent so much time reading abstracts to tag them, we would basically have walking encyclopedic knowledge of recent publishing in the field.
some of this functionality can ofc be replicated in library catalogues or google scholar or whatever, but the real value-add is the subject tagging and the relationships between those terms; this is where the bibliography is useful both for finding things and for showing an additional layer of information about the field and publishing in it. lots of academic fields have some equivalent of this, although i will say that our database was generally better (in the sense of more data and useful detail) than others i've used; it was a well-funded project run by a very dedicated prof who's been doing this for over 20 years now, and that continuity and institutional memory is really paying off for it.
but yeah if this is generally something that interests you, like i said, this is really just one specific form of bibliographic work. definitely look into what else is out there (i dunno how much of this would require a degree like an mlis even) and see what you think :)
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i think you should totally drop whatever hc/ideas you have lying around honestly...i would love to see more into ur brain...pls <33
:DD
Hi!!!! Sorry this is a little late, I got so distracted with an animatic im working on(😈) and then a stupid essay😭😭 being honest rn... Almost all of what I've been thinking about is my fic.. 😔
But!! I can still go a little into that without spoilers. I've finally figured out The Perfect ending for this story that I feel fits with the overarching themes I wanted to tell. I've been making sure that every little detail fits with the themes I wanted to show, I wanted it to overlap Regulus and barty's characters and their overarching themes with PD. I also didn't want to just replicate PD cause I feel like that doesnt have the depth or commentary I want to out into it. Idk ive always thought it's super fun to put everything as some sort of symbol or metaphor or foreshadowing. I'm like literally so close to being done drafting and then I can actually talk about it a little more😭
Anyways! I've also been thinking about barty post regs death 😔(when am I not) But more specifically how every memory he had would almost be tainted, everything now would have an air of questioning and unsureness. Even memories where Regulus isn't there, just wondering where was he? What was he thinking? Am I remembering this right? What could've I changed? What was the domino that caused all of this to happen? Eventually finding it hard to accept the way it really was, having the "I guess it was" and feeling it, but overintellectualizing it. His logic and reasoning is his downfall in this situation, that's what makes him go crazy. (Side note I NEED to make a little post about his intersection between intelligence and madness) Hes doing a complicated version of when there's a task that seems so simple that you think it's a trick, but it's not, it's just that. What happened with Regulus was just that.
Also, I've recently self reflected and realized that a lot of my barty characterization is similar to how I think of Leonard Cohen's art(who I LOVE LOVE LOVE) Idk if you've listened to him or read any of his work, but I HIGHLY suggest it, it's perfect for fall. Anyways, a lot of his songs and poems carry themes of having a twisted self image, not completely self deprication though it may seem, but something else. It's closer to understanding and knowing that you are. Different. And unconventional. It's an uncomfortablility he has with himself. Being soemthig twisted from what you should've been. A lot of his stuff is also to do with tragically losing someone, out of their own choice, and still feeling very loyal yet bitter. Also of loving something so much that it turns dark, or it goes too quick, it spirals. Also his love songs are very barty's perspective on bartylus to me. And like, obvious war mentions. I could give some specific recs similar to barty or them if you'd like.
Another thing is of Regulus and his relationship with his dad. Though I see it completely reasonable if his dad was just kind of, not there and neglectful, it could give very interesting implications to his character, I like it the other way around. Orion seeing what a more carefree attempt at raising a child does and keeping Regulus even closer than he did before. I think Orion always liked Regulus more, despite him being the second, because he was a model son. I don't think he wanted this life or even to have kids, so Regulus being so complacent and in line with what he was supposed to be as a pure blood made him the decided favourite(as much as he could have one). He was always keeping a close eye on Regulus and he could feel it, but he didn't do anything out of place anyways. Orion could tell when he was even thinking something he wasn't supposed to. I believe that, no matter how much she tried, walpurga was too caught in her own head about her duty as a mother to see S+R as anything other than Her Kids, as property that she was supposed to care for and tend to, she obviously loved them, but couldn't see through them. But Orion was there around every corner looking through regulus' eyes into his soul to search for any thing out of his perfect kid.
Anyways.... That's all I can think of rn😭 but if you have questions about ANY of them lmk!!! I love yapping about my little thoughts 😁😁
#barty crouch jr#bartylus#regulus black#starkiller#barty crouch junior#marauders#walpurga black#orion black#the noble and most ancient house of black#my fic#florsial
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transemasculation: for when you think freud was right about penis envy but ONLY for dirty little trannies (but seriously what the fuck is with this term? who thought this was a good ide- oh, right, ASSHOLES!)
it's really funny because I would make jokes about how TRFs don't want transmascs to make their own language without sending it in for approval to the Transfem Council and now the famous self-identified transradfem is like "here you stupid little boys I made you a word to use if you want one so bad."
That transemasculation shit is the most obvious set up to just keep making fun tmascs because people generally think emasculation is a funny and harmless nonissue maybe even #feminism. Like whats the bet if we did start using it how they want us to people would just immediately start connecting it to our “toxic transmasculinity” to dismiss it / continue to paint us as whiny MRAs anyway ?
it's so fucking belittling
One of the most frustrating parts of when a trans fem posts transandrophobic stuff openly for the first time is how any disagreement harsher than silence gets taken as "men abusing women" and held up as proof that she was right to be wary of trans mascs all along, because look how quickly we will turn on a trans fem and attack her—any negative feelings she has over the incident are just more evidence that she is a victim under siege and right to feel this way.
the wounded gazelle gambit is very popular
The thing that bugs me about transmasc on this site who called themselves TME is that I never see them doing any actual activism for trans women, they specifically just talk down on other transmasc users. Like it comes off so fake-
that's Feminist in Bio men for you
Kinda crushed to see bee/movie/erotica post that? Like??? Yeah white trans people can hold power over me but what the fuck do you think you're doing calling my maness the same as whiteness. my maness cant be the same as whiteness because I am not fucking white. hellworld.
I'm very sorry they let you down, anon. <3
You can tell TRFs are terfs because they do the same thing that terfs do where they point to people who call them baeddels and say that their critics are calling them slurs, and then a few days later will self-identify as baeddels again
they complained so much that I very generously got people to almost entirely saying TRF instead and immediately they just go "TRF is a slur to silence me :("
"the nefarious genderqueers think they're so much more radical and valid than us while the whole queer community actually caters to them, we need more representation for Real Binary Transsexuals" is a recurring theme in Whipping Girl so no wonder it's a common refrain for the "read a singular book" crowd
they do as they are taught
i really like your sense of humour btw
Thank you!
anyways all this patricia taxxon stuff is kinda just making me more motivated to make autistic transmasc therian video essays.
as you should honestly
because i love answering questions not aimed at me, re: is cheating abuse no, but it's a dick move that can be a part of abuse. abuse in a relationship is, for the most part, long term and actively emotionally/physically harmful to at least one person. cheating can be a part of abuse (for example, the fact the abuser cheated in the past, can be held over the abusees (? idk if that's the right term) head.) but alone it isn't. i hooe this made sense. i woke up two minutes ago and have thoughts! i would love to hear yours, because peoples opinions differ a lot in subjects like this
I think I agree with that.
Tall fat hairy women <3
<3
WOOFWOOF... HELLO BEAUTIFUL
;)
I’ve seen a few of your anons discussing the proposal of ‘transemasculation’ to replace ‘transandrophobia’ but I’m not sure that anyone has shared this info yet: https://www.tumblr.com/weepingfireflies/770239720162738176/im-not-even-transmasc-or-transfem-but-the essentially, ‘transemasculation’ was coined years ago by a transmasc user alongside other terms for related and adjacent discrimination/bigotry/etc.; the user who is trying to speak over transmascs about our our terminology and experiences apparently didn’t even bother to do a cursory check that what she posited was actually a new concept
I think it's been brought up but that is very funny, in a cosmic sort of way.
"trans men are men first!" gender essentialism is going to ruin us all like yes you're quite right if you're born a man no matter what your life experiences are, you are inherently more likely to be self-absorbed assholes who hate women. absolutely. the only thing terfs are wrong about it who counts as a man and who counts as a woman yep 100% i see no issues with this clearly our Man Brains make us evil
it's like yeah people who identify as men clearly have skull shapes that show an inclination towards misogyny
i rly appreciate seeing someone else who uses similar referential terms b/c i'm bigender and i honestly really like calling myself a male manwoman. it just feels right in a way nothing else does
I'm glad!
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Nene’s Dead Corpse and her ghost bf
randomly made a crap ton more sense to me
why?
fricking school (screw school I hate you (no not rly I’m just stressed))
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1499c93b9843258d8e5065c4a81bf268/a4de115ab7617553-cb/s540x810/a4544ea50d0e0bfa5f0d12228652b85430481526.jpg)
Anyway I’m a biomed class where unit 1 is studying medical investigations forensic science style
and one of the things is like, what happens to a person after the body has been dead for a while (post mortem or sum, see im learning :D)
Things like algor mortis, livor mortis, I’ve heard of. In fact I’ve even studied the clouding of the corneas before, but it never got to me till today
maybe it’s cause I cannot for the life of me study forensics without my wild imagination giving me nightmares or just panicking when I’m alone but aNyWays
I tend to imagine characters associated with death in these scenarios so I don’t lose it in class💀
*cough* Nene *cough cough*
So as I was taking notes on the slideshow, some of the images of clouded corneas reminded me strangely of something familiar, but at that point I couldn’t tell. There’s something haunting about the eyes (or maybe it’s just my over-analytical brain loving small details like this) they’re GORGEOUS
LIKE
IDK THEYRE PRETTY
Maybe it’s ‘cause the true color of the iris is completely visible in all its glory, without the pupil obscuring it
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/58a115d331104b2bcb477def3bd302ad/a4de115ab7617553-27/s540x810/0931da9563f19c6be4f386f30b72f0d42d11f162.jpg)
(something like this?? A little vivid tho lol)
but like
there’s no
life
no reflection, no emotion…nothing (which is so hauntingly beautiful leave me alone I’m a sucker for this now)
it’s literally just an eye with nothing but color
and then it hit me…it’s exactly the look Nene had when Mirai fast-forwarded her time
you can see in the image it’s just her plain magenta eyes with a fuzzy de-saturated blob in the center…aka clouded corneas
And that honestly made me realize that in this scene she’s not—she’s not even unconscious
No she’s literally, physiologically dead
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/25ec84155658eda2da8e04327d53f151/a4de115ab7617553-a8/s400x600/7fb82a4ff6db1e4717e7fb646f8a09c539e6cd05.jpg)
THAT IS A CORPSE HE IS HOLDING
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f6c5a9eba32ac827ac3075a66e41b026/a4de115ab7617553-dd/s540x810/b49353e64bddbda6d53942ca885ba901a98923b7.jpg)
she is literally a dead body this hits me so hard😭😭
and I can imagine algor mortis kicked in by then, her body was probably cold to the touch
so imagine how he felt, and I’m aware people have analyzed his emotions but just think about it
he’s always seen her so full of life and hope, and now all he has left is an empty shell of her, cold and dead with no life left inside
…just like him
the more I think about it Hanako is just an animated corpse
he has no reflection in his eyes most of the time because he is ✨dead✨
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/2ee4e12426aac6627585ee46a4ffad00/a4de115ab7617553-7b/s540x810/c026e40d4442d86283baf3f7f7397223645f27da.jpg)
I mean Mei, Mitsuba, and Hanako don’t have a little white reflection dot like Nene and Kou
Or maybe I’m overthinking it and Nene’s eyes are just super reflective
even for someone who presumably took his own life, he probably never saw tsukasa’s body start postmortem and actually feel dead bc it looked extremely bloody ngl (I’m guessing he killed himself right after 💔)
and now he’s holding someone he cares about like this for the first time and I’ll bet that scarred him
and he figured out that never, never ever did he ever want to see his sweet assistant like this again, lifeless in his arms
and so after that, cue Hanako in his villain era who basically became a yandere the entire picture perfect lmao
and he was unbelievably adamant about it too
I mean honestly if I held anybody I knew lifeless like that I’d be scarred for life and crying for days
seeing the light drained from someone’s eyes is so interestingly sad to me
Look at the difference:
Happy
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4819b7c905736b913997a383a7a65d1e/a4de115ab7617553-e3/s540x810/4478cbd60b7cc96836b52055db074c059af76d00.jpg)
vs Sad/Determined
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/4c8006d073d3a9d3b44a55749c5a63a8/a4de115ab7617553-89/s540x810/24061ac7eed82d0c45e6905bfe4e9daea0b94a06.jpg)
vs Depressed (ig??)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1b8d88dc3e8d870e9f3f444af3160dad/a4de115ab7617553-49/s540x810/993f5a25027ae5e75107a8b77ca43de0090a455d.jpg)
vs Dead
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/1508686973fc9760cf0464d0919fb92c/a4de115ab7617553-59/s500x750/42c0450188159a227f2f1fc1c75237027efb7398.jpg)
She still has so much emotion in her eyes
and then d e a d
literally looks like a porcelain doll
wait she looks so pale in the last image compared to the others now that I think about it
I love aidairo’s eye for detail it’s so fun to figure out
Well anyways thanks for coming to my Ted Talk essay atp-
IT’S PAST 1 AM AND I SHOULD BE STUDYING FOR SAID BIOMED CLASS AND HERE I AN GOING ON A TANGENT ABOUT A FICTIONAL CHARACTER’S EYES
send help
anyways excuse me while I grab a box of strawberries to munch on and cry my eyes out all over my homework before I sleep-
#hananene#tbhk#jshk#hanako kun#toilet bound hanako-kun#yashiro nene#tbhk manga spoilers#aidairo#my ramblings#my rambles#i literally have to wake up in 3 hours what am I doing#Yknow screw school Hananene is more important#i love angst#they’re so bittersweet#and beautiful
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for my own gratification bc i just ran into nie mingjue hate in the wild, would you mind making a post that defends my poor good boy? he worked so hard and got gaslit to shit before getting murdered terribly ;; literally everyone sat there telling him "youre being too harsh" and he's just responding appropriately. like yeah, if you witness a murder, ya kinda got to do something about that as a clan leader. its kinda your responsibility, even when you care about the person who did the murdering. he was also a really young when he took on the role of clan leader and idk, it just made me rlly sad to see people dunk on him cuz wtf he's literally just trying his best in an impossible situation WHILE being perpetually fucked over by his clan's own traditional cultivation cuz now the stronger he is as a leader, the closer he is to going literally insane and dying bc of it. (mingjue did nothing wrong i will die on this hill) ((sorry for going on a tirade, im just sad and defensive of my good boy rn))
Oh no! I'm so sorry you had to go through Nie Mingjue hate! Truly tragic. I went through that once when in the beginning of me reading the books, when I still had no proper opinions, and never again.
I'm more than willing to make a post about Nie Mingjue! I'm always down to talk about Nie Mingjue tbh, he's my heart and love and if I were to have been given the opportunity to be his right hand person, I would have simply never betrayed his trust and married him. Rip Jin Guangyao but I'm different.
Anyways, I, huhhh, actually think you?? Covered it all??? Pretty much?? Yet I will talk about it. This will be long and non-coherent, because I don't have the books rn to find quotes in them and honestly, I could write essays on Nie Mingjue either way.
Nie Mingjue is a central piece of the narrative, despite the limited amount of appearances he made, and the fact that he wasn't close to the main characters at all. The entire second part of the plot revolves around him- it happened because of him. His murder is a tragedy; literally, by greek standards, man has Cassandra Curse all over him, so I don't get how people can tell me, confidently, that his death was warranted. I've been told the man had asked for it, and this has mostly been by Jin Guangyao apologists.
So let me make something real fucking clear.
Nie Mingjue did not deserve to die. Let's get that out of the way, anyone can fight me on that. Nie Mingjue had more good qualities than half the people in this fucking story, despite his flaws. After his father was brutally murdered when Mingjue was only in his teens, Nie Mingjue stepped up as clan leader. We can only speculate the hardships that await someone leading a clan at such an early age. Yet, political challenges weren't the only thing he had to battle; Nie Mingjue knew about his clan's harmful cultivation, and he knew he was going to die young. So what did he do? His best. Literally his best, always. He was always giving 100% of his abilities, because that's who he was.
Let's talk about who Nie Mingjue was, shall we?
When Jin Guangyao, still Meng Yao then, describes Nie Mingjue, he finds himself perplexed, because Nie Mingjue isn't like other men. He is not frivolous, and he has no vices; Meng Yao describes how Nie Mingjue never showed an interest in arts, or alcohol, or women. All he did was train, and fight the Wens during the war. It shows that he had a one-track mind from the start, and has got a strict discipline; yet this strictly disciplined man, leader of a clan that prizes strength, continuously indulges his lazy and undisciplined half-brother, his one and only heir, despite not understanding his interests. We gather, pretty quickly, that Nie Mingjue is a bleeding heart for his brother, and for the ones he loves in general. We see the same softer side displayed in the presence of Lan Xichen, and of course, for some time, Meng Yao.
People seem to think Nie Mingjue took Meng Yao's betrayal too harshly. As if somehow seeing a man he thought to have been just and honest commit premeditated murder, then cover it up, was something he was just supposed to get over. To this day, I can't believe how Lan Xichen was so understanding of it. But not only did Nie Mingjue catch him in a cowardly act - Meng Yao proceeds to manipulate him, using the fact that Nie Mingjue cared about him, to stab him in the back. Or front, however it happened. I get that Meng Yao was in a difficult position, that he suffered at the Jins, that he felt backed in a corner; but Nie Mingjue was a man that had extended his help to Meng Yao before, and even then, he went to find Meng Yao in righteous fury, ready to help him again. To Nie Mingjue, the idea that Meng Yao "had no other choice" but to kill - to kill in the manner he did - it could have been nothing but a betrayal.
One thing that I personally highly respected Nie Mingjue for was the fact that he did not judge Meng Yao for his background. This is not up for debate; Nie Mingjue stood up for him, quite publicly, quite vocally, when Meng Yao was being insulted over it. And not only that, but he promoted Meng Yao to be his right hand man, just like that. Because he's impulsive, and to prove a point, but it was still huge of him to do. Not even Lan Xichen would have done that - In a society built on power dynamics between social classes, Nie Mingjue was one of the few characters who did not let that define his actions. It wasn't because he was born privileged (though he was) but because he he didn't let anything other than his judgment direct his actions. Nie Mingjue also never shied away from anything; if it had to be done, he did it, no matter the cost.
Nie Mingjue was decisive, and had an iron will. When Meng Yao killed the Nie disciples in Qishan, he wanted to kill Meng Yao. Meng Yao told him, paraphrasing, that "don't you understand that if I hadn't done that, it would have been your corpse up there?" and Wei Wuxian takes it to mean "Translation: I saved you so you can't kill me, because that would mean you're in the wrong." So Nie Mingjue hesitated for a second, then said: "Fine! I'll kill you, and then take my own life!" And the only reason he didn't, was because Lan Xichen was there. Otherwise, Nie Mingjue would have killed his former friend, then followed him to whatever afterlife awaited.
Nie Mingjue is often portrayed like he doesn't understand stuff, like he's stupid, simply because of his black and white sense of morality. That's not correct: Nie Mingjue understands motive, but he doesn't accept the ends justifying the means. Scratch that, he doesn't accept or justify either, if they're unjust. The murder of the Jin commander, the murder of the Nie disciples, not executing Xue Yang - how can Nie Mingjue possibly understand Meng Yao's decisions, when Nie Mingjue would rather die, any day, than live thanks to vile actions?
And then, Nie Mingjue starts falling into qi-deviation. We know that it affected his temper the most, and his judgement. I don't understand how it works, really, so I don't know by the end how much was Nie Mingjue and how much was the mess that the spirit made of him - maybe a combination of the two. But what is certain, is that the rapid qi deviation changed him.
But I could write a hundred more pages on him, meticulously going over every single scene he has ever appeared in, because I find him that interesting. I find him the most interesting, and the most appealing character, because in a story where the navigation of the cultivation world's complex politics and hierarchies with tact and diplomacy is crucial, Nie Mingjue stands uncompromising in his principles, choosing duty and honor over anything else, even when it's hard.
#the untamed#mdzs#cql#mo dao zu shi#nie mingjue#nie mingjue had his flaws#and he had his virtues#i will not allow slander on his name#when he always did what he thought was best and just and good#when he was loving and kind and hot-headed but he was also just in his early 20s with the weight of the world on his shoulders#cold absolutely freezing day in hell when i'm over him
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📩 Simblr question of the day: Who's your biggest inspiration/s on Simblr? Mention them! Tell us why you like them!
honestly probably could've made an 800 page essay on people who inspire me on simblr, but these are my BIGGEST biggest inspirations :P
@minimooberry : Honestly, she's the reason why I even pursued rendering in blender and her stuff is probably the only reason why I even joined Simblr to begin with 🥹
@stellarfalls : Bree, the LEGEND, has inspired me in a lot of ways but the biggest one was her GIFS... I remember seeing her post of Rohan and Hana's first meeting and that sparked a light in my chest... I wanted oh so badly to make Gifs as good as her... I'm getting there but we all have different styles so it'll never be exact and I know my gifs will be good in their own way 🫶
@birdietrait : Their overall sim style just... idk its so good and loved it when I first saw their posts 🥹
@groovetrys : Her general editing style was a HUGE inspiration for me, I can't quite explain or pinpoint it but I LOVE her editing its sooo aesthetically pleasing
@slightly-ludic : This is a bit of a smaller detail, but I just LOVE how Jade edits her globetrotter screenshots, I love the sort of narrator perspective in the text and I've started to try and do something similar in Make the Most of It :)
@mattodore : So i've always loved being passionate about my characters (hence why Roo still exists 5 years later), but seeing River's blog and how IN DEPTH they go for Theo and Matthias (and their other OCs ofc) and how much passion they have for their characters inspired me to get more into the blood and guts of my characters, I don't think I'll ever get there exactly cuz I feel like u could ask River what Theo was doing on February 9th 2018 and they'd have an answer and I would not LMFAOO
@rebouks : I am just overall VERY inspired by Becca, but she's one of the people who got me inspired to start making more poses (albeit I was already into making my own poses, she definitely bumped that inspo) and I'm very inspired by her storytelling, its SO good and feels soooooo human
@buttertrait @miralure @acuar-io : squishing these three together because all their vibes just make me so happy and inspired or at least allowed me to feel like I can be myself in this community (mainly cuz their vibes are similar to the vibes of people I like and am friends with irl)
@torissims : her whole aesthetic is just something that I ASPIRE to have... like the vibes of her yesterday save posts are just MWAH chefs kiss man
@missatan : (nat getting all my love today damn LMAO) I don't think my renders will ever be as 8K ultra HD 5 billion pixel quality as hers, but the symbolism behind them and just how good they look have inspired me to at least WANT to do/get better at rendering
some of these might not really be classified as "inspirations" but I still felt like sharing my adoration for these people - There's SO many more people I could've @'d but felt these were my very VERY best inspirations.
I should mention that all my mutuals inspire me one way or another, the community as a whole has inspired me to be kinder and inspired me to just spout my adoration for peoples' work
#this was VERY much so out of my comfort zone but i felt like dipping my toes in the deep end by mentioning all these people#while most of them are bigger blogs than me i still think its worth mentioning people so others can find them and see these peoples' amazin#-posts#def gonna end up looking at this later and feeling embarrassed as hell for mentioning so many people.. 😭#yapping#Anonymous
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just so you know bc I don’t think enough people tell you this but every time I check your blog (a bit compulsively at this point? your compilations and opinions are very enlightening on the general psychology of those crazy motherfuckers and also the uhhhhhhhh other part) and see that you answered another ask I honestly break into the hugest grin and settle down at the next given opportunity to read the newest batssay (batsplat essay) like it’s an academic paper (it is to us sports scholars, I believe)… please never feel the need to cut short your thoughts on any subject. the longer the better! connect all the dots, bat! we are listening!!
thank youuuuu this is so sweet, I know this ask is a little older but trust whenever I get something kind in my inbox I very much read and appreciate it and it very much makes my day. and I love the term batssay. a lot
so I thought it'd be fun to do a follow up post to the casey/jorge/valentino one where I just dumped a bunch of photos with a wee bit of context... for the culture, y'know. and I'm doing this with just casey/valentino, mostly for 2007-09 but with one 2005 photo chucked in as. build-up. for flavour
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we know from the #archives that the two of them did have like. a reasonably warm dynamic pre-casey's motogp debut. they'd talked... also at least one race where casey shows up to valentino's podium and chats to vale's crew chief and fellow aussie jb... I think about it often. what did it all mean
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casey's first win!!! qatar 2007, very first race with ducati. he'd gotten very close to a win before - in his third ever premier class race at turkey, lost at the final chicane. casey's goals going into that first season with ducat had just been winning a few races... he notes that valentino congratulates him warmly, but reckons it's just because valentino didn't take him seriously as a threat, which. I don't think that quite stacks up with supplementary evidence from the time, but we'll allow it
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one of my fave photos for a reason, idc it's sweet. I was trying to figure out when this photo was from through like, normal means of reverse image search, but then instead I had a horrifying moment of 'oh yeah I'm pretty sure I remember that specific presser backdrop is at mugello that year' and. I was right. which. god. anyway yeah mugello 2007 pre-event presser. by this point casey was 21 points clear in the championship standings
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more mugello 2007!!! look at casey constantly sipping from his lil cup. this will have been after qualifying, where casey snagged pole. I'd forgotten valentino actually makes front row in qualifying because he makes a typically horrendous start. I'd also forgotten that this race is like. proper good. one of the best that year. slows down eventually but the first ten or so laps are some of the most exciting of the entire alien era
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catalunya 2007, which unfortunately I also dated solely through the presser backdrop. idk I just like the vibes of this photo. anyway!! this race is ofc the one where casey won an all timer late race duel against valentino (+ dani). it is after this race that valentino said casey was, and I quote "riding like a god". a seminal moment
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the championship is already extremely over by the time they get to estoril, but casey still needs to formally wrap it up: this is his first match point race. depicted here is valentino getting one of his few Ws that season. an account of this event: “valentino was playing table football in the yamaha hospitality and somebody spotted casey outside. so they invited him for a challenge. it was all good fun”
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motegi 2007. valentino had managed to put off the inevitable the race before and temporarily stopped casey from sealing the title, taking his last win of the season (cool duel with dani in that one). but motegi... well honestly it's just a bit of a flop all round, nobody's bike is working the way they want it to, casey seals the title with his worst result all season of a sixth place (the horror) and in his autobiography he was kinda like 'well I was very happy but also. meh race' (I paraphrase). but really, who cares, he had his title
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bit of a time skip!! after both of them have put their sketch early 2008's behind them, the pair of them had a proper fun fight at catalunya for p2. a continuation of the battle the year before with valentino once again coming from lower down the field, this time he gets the better of casey. still, things are finally looking up at ducati... and the post-catalunya test might be enough to put casey right back in title contention. the above photo is from donington, where casey confirms the progress ducati made by winning his first race of the season after the opener in qatar
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still donington, both of them watching each other etc etc. valentino is in a much better place than the year before, given both casey's rough start to the season and how they're both now on the same tyres. but it's not a good sign if casey's hitting his stride... at assen, valentino makes his one mistake of the year and crashes on the first lap, remounting to finish eleventh (he still beats casey's teammate melandri). this puts dani in the championship lead - and with casey's second win in a row, he is now very much closing in
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look at them chatting here!! cute imo. this is casey's third win in a row, at the rainy sachsenring. dani crashes out from a few miles in the lead - while casey had stayed sensible and brings it home for a pretty straightforward victory. valentino needed to fight his way through from further down the field and in the end he loses too much time to put any serious pressure on casey, but it's still damage limitation and he retakes the championship lead from dani (who will miss the next race due to an injury sustained in the crash). and yet, momentum really is firmly on casey's side now... and the rest of the calendar does looks like pretty casey-friendly territory. next up, they're headed to a race track where casey had won very comfortably the year before. would he seal his fourth consecutive win at laguna?
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now with my sincere apologies to casey stoner, every photo that came out of laguna 2008 is objectively pretty funny. I have limited myself to a mere two podium photos, but lbr there's a full collection. casey had already rejected valentino's handshake in parc fermé - which some might have taken as a social cue to give him some space. whereas valentino, local dickhead, just will not stop yapping at casey on the podium. this is quite possibly as genuinely delighted as he gets after a race, and it's simply a beautiful contrast with casey who is not quite rude enough to actually tell valentino to shut the fuck up - but may be fantasising about pushing valentino off the podium. this, to me. is art
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gather around body language experts, we need to have a conversation. this is at the pre-event presser of the race immediately after laguna, aka brno. by this point, casey's less than flattering remarks about valentino's riding at laguna had already been distributed near and far... everyone's been talking about them, people have Opinions. the captions for these photos are all something along the lines of 'stoner extends olive branch to rossi to apologise for his post-race comments after losing laguna'. now, I don't know if he literally is apologising in these actual photos - though of course he did publicly walk back his comments, saying all riders can react badly to losses and that he'd overreacted when he'd said he'd lost respect for valentino. he has since walked back his walking back, doubling down on his criticisms of valentino's comportment at laguna
still, for all the talk that the feud properly started after laguna, it's kind of fun to have the presser immediately after it showing... well, it does look like casey is actively engaging valentino in conversation, right? whether he's apologising or not - this isn't just valentino yapping at him, if anything it's the reverse. laguna had been right before the summer break, so casey had been given a month to cool off... and also be viciously criticised by the press. brutal, isn't it? it's not just the loss that sucks, it's also being excoriated by the press and fans for having the audacity to get mad over it. is all of this just him being forced into pretending to play nice to get the press to leave him alone? were there any genuine regrets over his laguna comments? what ARE the vibes between them like at this time? what story do these photos tell us
casey went on to crash out of this race from the lead, the first time he had done so in the premier class and his first dnf with ducati after their one and a half seasons together. when he crashed, he'd had a fairly comfortable lead over valentino - though valentino was steadily closing in, and the commentators were already rubbing their hands in anticipation of another laguna
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the next race is at misano - and casey is struggling with an old hand injury, see the bandages in the photo. the previous year had been the first time valentino had gotten the chance to race at this circuit, so close to his home... but he'd suffered a mechanical dnf, not his first or last in a frustrating season. this year, everything is different - and casey once again crashes out of the lead as valentino takes victory in front of his worshipful home fans
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another trip to america, this time for indy: their first time racing at the track. after the double whammy of brno and misano, casey's title charge is essentially over... but you never know, right? indy kinda gives off the vibe of being a good casey track
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in the end, the race is extremely wet and very, very windy and is eventually red-flagged. because of how many laps they still have to go, it is initially unclear whether they would restart... at which point first valentino (who was leading), then casey (in fourth) go to dorna ceo ezpeleta to tell him they have less than zero interest in going out in that weather again. a beautiful moment of solidarity - long live the power of unionising, capable of overcoming even the bitterest of feuds. blast the internationale over the footage, I've seen enough. the race is called off and valentino wins his fourth consecutive race
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by the time they get to phillip island, valentino has already won the title, courtesy of his fifth consecutive win at motegi - the same circuit casey had won the title at the year before and the home race of valentino's old enemies at honda. a couple of nice photos of jorge congratulating his teammate and casey spraying vale with champagne here. casey, known phillip island goat, would of course finally end valentino's win streak at that circuit, which is where the photos are from. idk they're fun to me, like this is still not that long after laguna. I'm aware being able to chat normally with your coworkers and share a smile with them isn't normally that high a bar, but canonically valentino has been known to completely blank some of his rivals. it's not like casey is particularly cold towards valentino either, eh
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case in point. this is from sepang 2008. #TheEstablishment does not want you to know casey and valentino canonically still regularly yapped in pressers post laguna. they won't silence me. sepang was valentino's last win of this season, after a good scrap with dani - and the season is rounded off with a casey victory at valencia
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jerez 2009, where valentino gets past casey with a block pass at the final corner on his way to victory. unlike in 2005, he actually manages to not barrel into his rival. this is just a fantastic photo... I don't even have much to say about it. a+ vibes
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a lot of the photos from this season were already included in the jorge/valentino/casey post, which reflects how casey wasn't consistently a factor in the same way the other two were. this one's from assen, the race right after catalunya when all three of them were tied on 106 points. very good side eye here, excellent job casey. unfortunately, casey is now in mystery illness territory - and he can't really compete with the two frontrunners in this stretch of the season
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this is the first race after casey's return to competition - valentino goes up to casey after qualifying at estoril to congratulate him for his front row grid position. casey would win an early race scrap with valentino in the race itself, eventually finishing second behind jorge and swiftly silencing all the people who had declared him mentally weak and done for in his absence. a race that brought back suspense to that year's championship
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phillip island 2009, another important moment in the canon where I've limited myself to just the one photo. casey wins just his second race back - and he also hugs vale pretty warmly in parc fermé. jorge was kind enough to crash in the opening lap, meaning valentino can very much be pleased with a second place here
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and at sepang, valentino seals the title, while casey wins another race. casey ended up crashing in the warm-up lap of valencia, apparently due to an issue with the tyre warming? just kinda... the general vibe of his 2009, really. valentino closes off the season with another podium at his least favourite track, while dani takes the win
anyway after that they spent three years getting into increasingly. dumb arguments. like. so dumb. by the end of 2012 you feel you're killing your brain cells by even engaging with this stuff. it's beyond undignified. there's zero competitive justification, but they just couldn't shut up about each other. that being said, they're still capable of doing a small talk with each other even during the dark years, so that's something. maybe one day they'll finally be able to get that dinner and talk about all the good times
#get that green line test freak on twitter on the brno 2008 photos imo#nnngghhhh such a sweet comment truly anon... it really is appreciated i love seeing lovely stuff in my inbox#it's just my average response rate is. y'know#//#brr brr#batsplat responds#the important thing about this rivalry is you need the moment where you clock casey actually enjoys talking with valentino#which is notable insofar as casey. uh. actually extremely does not enjoy talking to a lot of people. like that's a born misanthrope#it just really adds to the tension of that rivalry#casey's stance on valentino is that he's The Actual Devil but also a pretty nice guy. which... well he's not wrong is he#other valentino rivals aren't enlightened enough to hold both of these opinions simultaneously but casey. casey has them all beat
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I just don't understand...
how you don't miss me in the black dog
I had no idea what to expect with this album. Taylor's brand is "never let them know your next move"
So, was it going to be more of a folklore/evermore/red vibe? Or was it going to be pop in the way midnights was? I did not think it was going to be straight up pop, but you just never know. I don't have cable so it can be really hard for me to watch award shows in real time, so I pulled a few strings so I could stream the grammys and thank god I did. I could not believe the album announcement and I was honestly gagged about the whole thing.
Now... This is a devastatingly beautiful album and is so vulnerable and raw.
The Prophecy... she literally said "I will go bankrupt. I will give up everything because I am hurting so much I need someone to tell me things are going to be okay and I don't care what I have to do to get this confirmation/assurance. I just want someone to love me the way I love them and I don't care about the superficial things." and she was so real for that.
The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived... the first time I listened to it was like 12:30 AM on album release night/day, and I was yaknow, chilling, listening. and then we hit the bridge... my jaw hit the floor. I literally shot up in bed and was like "holy fuck." when i thought the song was wrapping up, it just kept going. Obviously I had to listen to it again right after it ended. (and I am NOT mad about it. I feel this song in my bones) ((My fiance was also dead asleep during all of this and I made him listen to it at like 10 AM the following day))
(peace: i'll die for you in secret ➜ TSMWEL: i would have died for your sins) ((actually screaming crying vomiting idk))
My favorite part of when she sings this on the eras tour is when she says "hey.. give this message to the smallest man who ever lived" and then turns to the audience and starts singing the bridge. She's like "Yup- heres this message, and another thing- fuck you!" literally incredible. i have an emotional attachment to this song. I could write an essay and honestly, maybe I will.
It's so funny to me because every time Taylor puts out a new album, there are some songs that I hear where i'm like "WOW. This is it. This is the song. She summed up my entire experience in a way I never could. I don't know how much more accurate she could get." And then she comes out with some insane song that keeps the cycle going.
(it's the cycle that keeps on giving and the cycle that keeps me alive! no, seriously. when i was in the hospital at one point in my life, i was asked everyday "and what is something you want to live for?" my answer: my cat and taylor swift's music")
All of this to say... I am so happy I was/am medicated when this album came out.
Here is my ranking of the Tortured Poets Department! (This was incredibly difficult because all of the songs are just so good. Noting that I don't think that any song is a bad song.)
The Black Dog
The Smallest Man
The Prophecy
How Did It End?
Guilty As Sin
My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys
loml (but sometimes it changes places- just depends on the day, but it never goes lower)
Fresh Out The Slammer
But, Daddy I Love Him
Who's Afraid of Little Old Me?
So Long, London
Down Bad
I Can Do It With A Broken Heart
So High School
I Hate It Here
TTPD
Fortnight
Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus
Peter
Cassandra
Flordia!!!
The Alchemy
The Bolter
thanK you aIMee (thank You aimEe)
Clara Bow
The Albatross
The Manuscript
imgonnagetyouback
I Look In People's Windows
Robin
I Can Fix Him (no really I can)
Honorable mentions:
youtube
CHILLS
youtube
youtube
I was so shocked (I watched on a grainy livestream)
youtube
When I say I sobbed, I'm not joking. I texted my sister and said "You need to get on this livestream RIGHT NOW.
Check out these small businesses:
Here is the link to a down bad t-shirt: So good for the gym and its a comfort colors t-shirt!
Direct link to the storefront: They have so many cool items!
Check out the link: It's a TTPD vinyl/cd holder and it is actually the coolest thing I've ever seen (I will be purchasing)
Direct link to the storefront: There are a few different options! Check them out!
@taylorswift @taylornation @taylorswift @taylornation
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