#and i will do big stuff so i dont get overwhelmed by folding either

[strawberrydykke]

turns out when you actually take your medication consistently they do work a little bit. not all the way and certainly not enough but A LITTLE BIT. anyway im at that stage where i want to do things now but i don't have the energy to actually do anything. i want to clean my room i want to do bad art i want to KNIT. i have the desire but not the motivation or energy. it's so frustrating.

[hanymelon]

Hi! Your art is *chef's kiss* and the ways you draw Mammon solo or with your MC are super cute and I love the way you detail his blushes and expressions so much. I get excited everytime I see you post a new drawing 💕

I was wondering if you had any tips for a beginner artist on, like, anatomy or just starting off in general? I usually just write and stick to that for OM, but some ideas feel like they should be drawn. I get confused with where I should start practicing and usually just drop the idea altogether.

Sorry if that put you on the spot or anything, don't feel bad if you don't wanna answer. I also really just wanted to gush about your art and ty for drawing so much good stuff!

Hi! Awwh thank you so much! ;v; Im so happy you get like my art enough to say that <333 💕💕💕 I know what you mean about getting ideas that feel like they should be drawn. Sometimes i get ideas that i think would be better done in writing. If you wanna share what you've written, id love to give them a read :)) No pressure tho! Ah, i get excited when someone is starting to pick up drawing. It can be challenging but super rewarding. Before i give specific tips, firstly I'd say if you are just starting out, have fun with it and dont stress too much about the technicalities. If you get too caught up with how something doesn't look right or how your anatomy is wonky, you'll bog yourself down and end up not creating at all which is sad :( In the end, its really about getting your ideas down on paper and it shouldn’t be something too too stressful since youre doing it for fun anyway! I have to remind myself that no one is holding me at gunpoint and forcing me to create drawings with perfect anatomy or proportions, im still learning! And thats okay!

[More under the cut bc this got kinda long!]

With that out of the way, here are some tips you can hopefully use. Im not that great at anatomy either, but what helps me a lot is references. Its pretty typical advice, but it really helps me understand form and what the human body can and cant do. like can the arm twist that way? Idk, look up a reference. Although it is the best way, sometimes its really overwhelming to look at actual pictures of humans and trying to translate that to a cartoony anime-ish drawing so you can start out by referencing anime (or cartoons) instead. When i was starting out i used to do little studies on styles that i liked. That can help a lot with seeing how artists you like draw certain things. For example how they make the arms and legs not look stiff, the specific curves they use for the waist, the folds in the clothes, etc etc. (Goes without saying here, but just don't upload your studies or copied drawings on the internet and claim it as your own and you're all good) I’d insert pictures of my own studies but i dont have them with me where i am rn so i cant do that unfortunately sorry! So lets say you have this super specific pose in mind and you cant find a reference for it or youre just too lazy to sort through hundreds of pictures on google or pinterest to find that one perfect ref img. You can just pose and take a picture of yourself. i do this a lot and sometimes get my friends (who are also art students so that makes things easier haha) to help if i need it. If you really dont want to do that tho, something i also do a lot is to do the pose while drawing it. Feeling and seeing where my body naturally leans and where body parts are relative to each other in a certain pose really helps. for example if im drawing someone waving, how far away is the hand from the head, should the elbow be out or close to the body, how long should the forearm be etc etc. Yknow the thing where you make the same expression as the character you're drawing? The way you kinda feel the way its supposed to look? Yeah its like that but for poses fjsv i hope this makes sense. Personally im not a big believer of the "Draw everyday!! Even when you dont feel like it!!" advice. But If youre really enjoying what you do, youd wanna be doing it every day anyway. And the more you draw, the more comfortable itll become and the more things will kind of make sense when you notice patterns as you practice. I guess what im trynna say is make the practice fun and not feel like a bother so you'd wanna do it more and in turn improve more. Its a cycle haha.  Im not the most qualified to give advice but i hope this helped a bit? There are plenty of sources on the interwebs that are very useful and can probably help you a lot. I hope you keep drawing anon! Tldr; Draw what you want, use references, strike the pose and feel your body, make practice fun (whatever that might mean for you), the more you do it the better you’ll get

[mister-lady]

I did fic gmkfkdkfr. And it what, only took me several weeks to write a fic for Dice? Mvgkdkkf. This was still fun and I liked it :3 and sorry if ttheres a lot of typos, I only seemed to be able to write this before I went to bed or before I woke up so it might be a little sloppy fkdkdkdk this was also a lot longer than I intended so ubm,, sorry about that

AU: uhh.. I dont know if theres a proper au name? Store clerk au? Idk but you'll get it cjfms

TW: talk about food, mention of blood, mention of looking like someone got murdered, talk about sharks eating someone

----------

Matt had a party he was invited too, and for Matt this was a special occasion, so he decided to go out and get some formal wear! He had a few dresses and such at home, but he wanted something with a newer and fresher feeling. Lucky for him, there was a nearby tailor shop that he knew about. He's never been to the tailor shop because he's never really needed anything from the place, so he was a mixture of excitement and nervousness at going. Thankfully for him, the nervousness wasn't too overwhelming this time.

As Matt stepped into the tailor shop, he was quickly hit with the smell of strong perfume- or was it cologne? Either way it was powerful enough to give him a small headache the second he walked it. He couldn't help but notice the small bell that jingled as he walked in, and smiled at the noise. Matt decided to look around, and caught a glimpse of a perfume stand that had it's own counter and shelf to it. Matt could only guess that's what was causing his headache. He couldn't help but also notice how big the store was too. He expected it to be some small tailor shop like the stores you would find inside a mall, but this once mind as well be the mall. He could only imagine how much money this place was gaining to be so big, and the concerned him because that normally ment it was pricey, and Matt wasn't really in the mood to go 50 miles elsewhere because he was a broke sucker. The interior had bright white walls and white floor tiles too, and the lights made the whole place seem to glow, only contributing to his minor headache. Though, it did make sense that they would need good lighting if it was a tailor shop, which seemed to have mini stands inside that sold other stuff, like the perfume one he had spotted earlier. Matt walked further in to get a better look and saw some other people that were presumably with store clerks that were taking their measurements or picking out clothing that would work with them. Matt also noticed that the majority of customers were females, which made him grow a little self conscious and contrary to what the website said, he almost started to doubt if this place had items for more masculine customers like himself. Matt hadn't gotten too far into the store before being abruptly stopped by someone. Matt shrunk a little, the person that stopped him looked rather intimidating, they were wearing mostly black clothing that hugged his body and had a scarf wrapped around his neck even while indoors, and also had a pair of shaded circle glasses that made it harder to see his eyes, again, while also indoors. 

"And what brings you here?" The mystery person had asked.

Matt quickly scanned the person for a nametag, and found one on his chest with his name written on it. "Uhmm… I came here to maybe find an outfit for a party I need to go to later?" Matt was debating if he should bother using the person's name, as he wasn't ready to potentially butcher it.

"A party? Tacky; but fine. Come with me I'll help you pick out something." The man waved his hand, signaling Matt to follow him.

"T-tacky??" Matt blurted out before wishing he hadn't spoken up.

"Uhm, yeah. Tacky. We sell things like dresses and suits, not poorly colored and terrible silk clothing for a party no one is going to remember." The person didn't even turn around to face Matt while speaking, and kept walking.

Matt was left speachless, he didn't even know how to respond to that, especially because it was a slightly true statement. After a few minutes of Matt not knowing what to say, and feeling stupidly shy, he decided to at least look around and see if anything caught his eye. Matt didn't realize that the person he was following had stopped, and almost bumped into him. 

"Here, stand on this stool." The guy pointed to a small stool that was set infront of a mirror against a wall. 

Matt obeyed and stepped onto the stool. He looked at himself in the mirror before quickly looking away for several reasons.

"Stand up straight." The idiot wearing glasses indoors ordered.

Matt quickly shot up and fixed his posture and stretched his arms out straight and was quickly filled with embarrassment. The worker pulled out a tape measurement and quickly started taking Matt's measurements. Matt, like the dork he is, felt his cheeks flush at someones hands being so close to his body, especially when taking measurements for clothing, which that normally required waist and bust measurements. Matt looked away, avoiding eye contact like it would kill him. He was probably making the situation seem worse that it probably was. The worker stood up and put the tape measurement back into his pocket before seeming to think about something.

"Don't you need to write the measurements down?" Matt shyly asked.

"I do this every day as a job, I have it in my head." The worker spoke with a tinge of sass in his voice. "What are you particularly looking for, anyways?" 

"Uhm.. well, I was mostly looking for a suit, though I normally don't wear the overcoat with it so maybe just a fine button-up shirt with a tie?" Matt had subconsciously reverted back to being slightly hunched over and his hands were fiddling around with the cuffs of his sleeves. 

"I'm sure I can find something for that. Any particular color you're looking for? And what type of tie? Are you allergic to any fabrics? I need all the details." 

Matt was overwhelmed by the sudden burst of so many questions and almost immediately blanked on anything he was just asked. "Oh I uh.. I'm not allergic to anything, uhm.. I'm not too picky about color, and I'd prefer a bowtie." 

"Very specific, aren't we?" The worker teased.

"Well I don't want to seem too picky, I mean I don't want anything too expensive." Matt stumbled over his words.

"Darling, being picky here is what we need. Lucky for you I'm not someone that just throws anything on you for money." 

"Ah yes, how lucky I am." Matt muttered sarcastically.

"So, are you sure you don't have a preference? Becuase I don't want to pick soemthing for you and you go complaining." 

"I won't complain!" Matt stubbornly said.

"Fine, fine. You're words not mine." Then he walked off, probably to go and find something for Matt.

Matt couldn't help but think how oddly the place was ran. Matt didn't expect it to be that they pick something for you, he thought it'd be like any normal clothing store, where he could pick out what he wanted to wear. Of course, if a customer pointed out something they liked then the worker would probably get it for them or allow them to look around, but Matt would rather die than speak up like a normal person. Plus, this guy seemed to know what he was doing anyways, so Matt didn't mind too hard. While Matt was thinking about looking around he decided to see what was around him anyways. There was a small jewelry section nearby which probably had necklaces and earrings and chains and bracelets. There were also shelves on either side of Matt, not too close to him, but if he stretched out both of his arms fully, he could probably touch the two shelves. They looked like they would be shoe wrecks, but actually had folded clothing on them. Matt noticed an orange Hawaiian shirt with pineapple print all over it and three white buttons extending down from the collar of the shirt. He couldn't help but giggle as he picked it up, but made sure to not unfold it in the process. I mean, it was a party after all, right? Not some elegant ball. And it's not like a silly pineapple shirt hurt anyone anyways, right? He carefully set it back where he had grabbed it from, and eagerly scanned the shelves for anything else that might catch his interest. Most of the things on the shelves, as for the rest of the store, were all silky material stuff or fancy and were probably meant for more special occasions rather than a party that Matt was going to sit out in the bathroom all night. Yet… something felt different about the clothing on these shelves. Most of the shelves were a beaming white, and only had three or four shelves near the bottom for shoes and some folded pants or socks and stockings, and had hangers at the top for skirts and dresses and shirts and gowns and such. The shelves near Matt were brown and only had folded clothing on it. And Matt just noticed the prices were a lot cheaper too. It was like he found the discount regect section of the store. Though, Matt didn't mind it too much because he found a shirt he liked.

Matt was so lost in thought, he didn't realize his "buddy" had already came back. Matt actually didn't even know until a shirt got tossed at him, causing him to almost drop it. Matt held it up and examined it. It was a green button-up shirt with black buttons. Matt glanced up at the worker, like he was expecting him to say something, which just lead to them kinda blankly looking at eachother for a little bit.

"Well?" The worker prompted.

"Well what?" Matt echoed.

"Do you like it? I found a pastel purple one too, and you could maybe wear brown slacks with them, but I think black would better suit you." 

"Well I don't mind it, than sounds fine." 

"Don't mind it? We need something you'll love, not just feel neutral towards." The worker said it as if he was offended. "Did anything catch your eye maybe while I was gone?"

Matt hesitated for a moment, and shyly glanced at the pineapple shirt and pointed at it as if he wasn't allowed to touch it. 

"Really? That?" The worker questioned and furrowed his brows.

"W-well you did ask…" 

"Yeah it's just… theres a reason it's in a separated section from everything else." 

"I assumed so, but it's pineapples.." 

"But you'll look like a a torrist that got lost."

"Ouch, thanks."

"Look, I'm trying to say it nicely, but you'll look like a complete dork."

"No dorkier than your name." 

"Hey! My name is not bad, if anything it's plenty better than whatver yours is."

"I didn't say it was bad! I said it was just dorky." Matt said defensively. "I like dorky things. I am a dork." Matt added.

"Yeah, uh, you do realize normally dork isn't a compliment, right?"

"Emphasis on normally."

"Look, if you like my name I'm not going to complain, alright?"

Matt huffed out a sigh. "I just wanted a shirt how do these situations happen to me." 

"Here, I found this too." The worker said and tossed another shirt into Matt's arms.

"Jesus christ." Matt muttered.

"What?" 

"Dice- can I call you that? I mean it's your name but..- Anyways, this shirt stinks."

"How? I mean if you think it's bad you don't have a sense of fashion." 

"I mean, I don't but…anyone looking at me far away will think I got stabbed." 

"And then they come up, see what it really is, and want to try it themselves. It's perfect."

Matt shook his head in silence. The skirt was white, but it had big flowers on it that were a deep red color, making Matt look like someone tried to shank him all over. Matt loved flowers but this was just asking to mess something up.

"If it helps, it's better than your pineapple shirt that you wanted." Dice said, like that was supposed to help somehow.

"If you don't like the pineapple shirt so much, cant I just buy it then?"

"No, I'm trying to save you."

"Save me? The only saving I'll need is from when someone calls the paramedics cause I look like I swam with some sharks." 

"Oh yes, because being dressed like a fruit helps. It's not even a floral print it's a pineapple. I don't even need to explain what's wrong with that."

"Do you do this with every customer or?.."

"No, just you." 

"Wow"

"Theres so much good clothing in here like suits and dresses and better patterns and nicer clothes and things that compliment you, than some pineapple shirt you can get at a Dollar Tree store."

"Y'know, you almost make me want to thank you."

"Well, you should be thanking me." 

"I'm not going to." Matt made sure to say this in a rather playful tone, even though most their conversation had been teasing banter.

"Here, how about we just find something we can both settle on?"

"You're best idea yet. That sounds fine."

"Good." Dice walked off to go and look for something for Matt, but this time Matt decided to follow him as well.

It didn't take long for Dice to spot something and show it to Matt. "Here, how about this?" Dice offered.

Matt recoiled a little bit when it saw it. "It's not bad but..-" 

"But?" Dice cut off Matt.

"Well.. it's so scratchy looking!" 

Dice looked over Matt as if he was trying to check if Matt was being genuine or not. "You haven't even tried it on yet!!"

Matt timidly reach out a hand and rubbed it across the shirt before cringing back a little bit. "No."

Dice sighed before putting the shirt back and going off the hunt for something else suitable for Matt. Matt glanced around, he felt a little bad and a little afraid that he was being annoying, but he tried to push it away. Matt let in an excited gasp as he spotted something, before scampering off to go and pick it up. 

Matt picked it up with a wide grin and held it up to show Dice like he discovered something new.

"That one?" Dice questioned.

"I am not letting you talk me out of this one! It has a space theme and that is final." Matt pointed at the shirt he was holding up, which had stars and planets all over it.

Dice held up a hand to his chin and looked over the shirt like he was considering it. He ended up giving in. "Okay, it's not too bad and I suppose it's better than that pineapple shirt…"

"I don't know what's with you and pineapples but I'll take it!" Matt was beaming and was bouncing on his heels from happiness. 

Dice gently took the shirt from Matt's hands and checked for a price tag. Matt frowned a little, he completely forgot that prices were a thing since he was so caught up in his excitement. Dice glanced around and snagged a pair of long purple jeans and handed the clothing to Matt. 

"How much will it cost?" Matt asked, almost not wanting to hear the answer.

"....I'll just say fifteen dollars." Dice responded.

"For both?" Matt asked, surprised.

"I want to help you pay for it." 

Matt was surprised by the answer. "Are you sure?" 

"Mhm." 

"Isn't that illegal in a way though?.." 

"Maybe if you want to look at it like that, but you're cute so I'm letting it slide."

Matt felt himself get flustered at the comment, whether it was supposed to be flirtatious or not. He decided to not respond and just shake his head in response, though he was pretty sure Dice had noticed anyways.

As Matt ran up to the nearest counter to pay, he couldn't help but feel the need to Wave goodbye to Dice. Things like that happen when you become attached to people after five minutes. Matt was oddly surprised to see Dice wave back but was warmed by the feeling. As Matt ran off to his car so he could try on his clothes sooner, he noticed a small paper hanging out the pocket of the shirt he had just picked out. He grabbed the paper before it could fall out and got deeply flustered and joyous at what was written on it. There was a small drawing of a single die cube, and a phone number written next to it. It didn't take long for Matt to quickly punch the number into his phone and pray it wasn't some rouse. He decided to just send one small message saying "hi :D". Right as Matt went to put his phone back into his pocket, it buzzed signaling he got a new notification. Matt checked it and tensely checked if it was what he was truly hoping for. He read the message so fast he had to read it a second time after not picking up what it had said. It read:

Already texting me right as you just left? Someone's clingy and in love.

Matt sighed and smiled and stuffed his phone back into his pocket. He had a feeling this was going to end up being something he needed to buckle in for, but whether that was necessarily a bad thing? He didn't think it was.

[i-have-a-wonky-eye-too]

What we’ve always wanted!

wildefire said:If you’re still doing requests I’d like to know if you could do a stucky x reader skit? Where the reader and has a sort of jealous animosity towards the bous, and the rest of the team gets tired of it so they get locked in the gym together?

I hope this is okay. Sorry it’s taken me a while, I kinda struggled with it strangely.

Y/N: Where are you?x

Steve: out with Bucky, why?x

Y/N: Oh... we were meeting for lunch, remember?x

Steve: yes?

- Sorry doll. I completely forgot.

- Bucky says you’re welcome to join us. Will you? Please?x

Y/N: I’m okay, thanks. It was only for a catch up x

I sighed as I walked into the common area with my earphones in, blasting AC/DC. Thanks, Tony. I had’t been back to the tower all day and I’d been avoiding any calls. I just needed to be on my own for a bit. Sometimes I found being an Avenger overwhelming. I wasn’t a ‘super-soldier’ like Steve or an amazing assassin like Natasha. I was a computer geek, a hacker so to speak.

For what seemed like the 100th time my phone rang and I hung up. Suddenly my earphones were pulled out of my ears scaring the hell outta me. “What the-”

Steve frowned down at me, his arms folded over his chest. “Why’d you hang up?”

I rolled my eyes with a sigh. “I’m in the tower. I was gonna come and find you.” I lied, hoping Steve wouldn’t look into it.

“Right, so, you’ve been where, all day?” Steve shrugged his shoulders as he asked in his Cap voice. I rolled my eyes again at him. “Y/N! Stop, with the eye rolling, it’s annoying.” he sighed.

I shook my head, looking him up and down. “Where are you off?” I referred to his appearance.

“Oh, Bucky, Sam and I are going out for the night.” he beamed. My face dropped at his words. “Don’t change th-”

“Are you kidding me?” I creased my brow.

“What?” he shrugged.

“It’s Saturday night.” I said like it was obvious. He shrugged again. “We were gonna watch the next series of Sherlock, together.” I frowned.

“Oh, we’ve already watched it.” Bucky pattered my shoulder as he walked past me. I growled a little as I watched him enter the elevator with Sam.

I turned back to face Steve. “Why’d you watch it with, him? That was our thing.” I frowned.

Steve began laughing at me. “C’mon, doll. I can watch it again with you.”

I shook my head. “No you can’t. You’ve ruined it.” I sighed pushing passed him.

Bucky sighed dramatically. “You’re such a baby...C’mon, Punk. Let’s go.”

After binge watching Sherlock for about seven hours in my room, I headed down to the kitchen to get something to eat. It was well after 1am so most Avengers will have already turned in for the night. “Isn’t, it, past your bed time?” I ignored Bucky as I passed him, Steve, Sam, Natasha and Thor who were in the common area drinking. “See! I told you, she hates, ME!” he laughed.

I stood in the kitchen making myself a sandwich for myself trying to ignore the laughter in the next room. “Okay, what’s up your butt?” Nat asked from behind me.

“Nothing.” I shrugged.

“Y/N, don’t try to lie to me. I know you like the back of my hand.” she smirked as she stood next to me. “Spill, now.” she demanded.

I sighed putting the knife I had in my hand down. “I- I just... feel, I dunno-” I shrugged shaking my head. “Lonely.” I frowned looking up at her. “Without... Steve.” I dropped my head.

“Sexually?” she questioned with a raised eyebrow.

I screwed my face up ‘ewing’ at her. “What? No!” I shook my head almost gagging at the thought of me and Steve.

“OH MY GOD!” Bucky burst out laughing behind us. “That’s, hilarious!” he held his stomach as he bent over laughing. I groaned closing my eyes, wishing the floor would just open up and swallow me whole.

Steve ran into the kitchen along with Sam and Thor, all looking ready for an attack. “What’s wrong?” Sam asked.

“She- her-” Bucky couldn’t talk cause of the laughing. “Brother-”

“Brother?” Steve raised his eyebrow at Bucky before looking at me and Nat. “What’s going on, Y/N?”

I shook my head about to speak but Nat piped up first. “Y/N is lonely, without you.” my eyes widened. “Possibly sexually?”

Steve and I pulled a face of disgust at each other as we stepped away from each-other. Bucky began laughing even more as did Sam. “I do not understand? I thought the two of you were, siblings?” Thor asked.

Bucky managed to calm his laughing down a little. “That’s, what I was trying, to, say.” he snickered. “It’d be like Nat asking me it.” I rolled my eyes at him.

“Well, you and Steve are a lot closer tha-” Nat looked at me, a smirk forming on her lips. “Ah...” I shook my head as I once again picked my sandwich up and began leaving the kitchen. Nat following closely. “Are you jealous?”

“No.” I sighed as I walked into my room, sitting back on my bed. “I don’t hate him, either.”

“You heard, him?”

I nodded taking a deep breath as I placing my plate on the bedside table. “I don’t, hate him, Nat.” I sighed looking down. “Thor was right. Me and Steve were so close at one point, he was like my big brother but, I dunno, ever since Bucky came back into the picture... Steve’s, forgotten me.” I admitted. “I didn’t have a family growing up and Steve was starting to feel like what I was missing.”

“Have you told him? Them?” she sat up looking at me.

I shook my head. “Every time I try to, they go off to do something... I mean, are they fucking?” I blurted out making Nat burst out laughing. I covered my mouth as I began laughing with her.

Nat: Don’t forget training this morning x

- Don’t be late! x

Y/N: Yeah yeah. See you in 5!x

I headed down to the gym to meet Nat for our early training session. After last night I wasn’t really in no mood for anyone. I pushed the door open expecting to see Nat already running on the treadmill or getting somethings out for our session. “Nat!” I shouted. “Nat?” I frowned as I lifted my wrist to look at my watch. “Asshole tells me not to be late.” I muttered.

“Language!” I jumped at the sound of Steve’s voice behind me. He chuckled as he walked over to me. “What you doing here?” he asked dropping his stuff next to me.

“Having a party.” I shrugged. Steve rolled his eyes looking away. “That’s annoying.” I smirked a little, mocking him. “Why are you here? Don’t you usually go for a run this early?” I asked.

He nodded. “Yeah, but Buck wanted to train in here this morning.”

“The hell I did.” Bucky announced his arrival as he burst through the door. Both Steve and I frowned at his loudness. “You, were the one who wanted to train. You said it was a tea, thing.” he shrugged.

Before I could say anything else the sound of the doors being locked caught our attention. “YOU THREE AREN’T LEAVING UNTIL YOU TALK!” Natasha shouted through the door.

“About what?” Steve asked.

“Y/N knows!” Sam shouted.

I sighed shaking my head. Of course she told him. “There’s nothing to talk, about.” I answered.

“Not even the feeling lonely without, Steve?” Bucky smirked at me over his shoulder.

I rolled my eyes as I turned round to take a seat on the bench. “You make me sound creepy, saying it like that.” Bucky began laughing at me, making me annoyed. “Why do you think I hate you?” I asked.

“You do.” Bucky sighed resting his back against the doors.

I shook my head sighing. “I don’t, Bucky. How could I?... you’re lovely.” I smiled at him, making him look away trying to hide his reddening face.

“So, why do you, act, weird around, me?”

“Cause, I’m jealous.” I admitted.

“Of Bucky?” Steve chuckled taking a seat next to me.

“Thanks, Punk.” Bucky frowned at him.

Steve held his hand up in defence before putting his arm around me. “Y/N, you don’t need to be jealous of Bucky.”

“I’m not!” I got up quickly. “No offence dude but, my life is pretty good... apart from my parents dying when I was a kid...” I frowned. “I dunno, ever since you came back into the picture... Steve’s, forgotten me.” I admitted.

“I haven’t forgot about you, Y/N.” Steve admitted. “But, Bucky needs me more than-”

“No, I don’t.” Bucky sighed getting up. I watched him as he walked over to where we were. “Look Steve, I appreciate everything you and everyone has done for me so far but, I’m not a porcelain doll. You can leave me on my own once in a while.” he smiled placing his hand on Steve shoulder before sitting down next to him.

“I know, Buck, I just... worry, about you.” Steve sighed. “I’m sorry... to the both of you.”

There was silence in the gym for a brief moment before Bucky spoke up. “So, what are you jealous of?”

“Hmm... Steve’s like my big brother but I kinda feel like, he was just waiting for you... I didn’t have a family growing up and Steve was starting to feel like what I was missing.”

Bucky sighed getting up form the bench and stepped forwards. He hesitantly lifted his arms and wrapped them around me, pulling me into a hug. “Ya’know, I always wanted a little sister.” he smiled against the top of my head.

I wrapped my arms around him as I smiled into his chest, holding him closer. “Me too.” Steve joined the hug, making me laugh as they squashed me between the two of them.

“GET A ROOM!” Sam shouted, causing the three of us to let go of each other. “AH! What was that for?” I burst out laughing, knowing Natasha probably punched him in the arm for ruining a nice moment.

[deadmantalking117]

HOW TO BE A PATIENT

This is something I've written a lot about on various support sites. When you first get sick or injured .. It's likely you've had almost zero experience with our healthcare system. I've been in and out if hospitals my ENTIRE life.. litterally.. since the day I was born. As a baby.. I had rhuematic fever. Almost died. As a toddler I was hospitalized for asthma attacks twice.. I would just stop breathing. Every childhood disease.. measles... German measles.. chicken pox.. mumps... Migraines starting at 4 years old.. on an on. As a finally healthy teen.. I went to the ER twice for concussions while playing football.. and the odd fishhook to the face.. and a whole week at 13 years old to run dozens of tests for the migraines. I spent Halloween 1973.. in a hospital ward with 2 other boys.. we all got in trouble for spending the night covering the tile ceiling in spit balls! Apparently God has been priming me for this mission my whole life ! I sometimes think that "how to be a patient" should be taught in high school.. as part of health classes. There's a lot to know. Believe me when I tell you.. you don't! So here's my best tips for newbies. 1- BE A GOOD PATIENT I know you're afraid. That's completely normal. You've either just gotten very sick or injured. You're likely in pain. This sucks. But try to stay calm. Listen to what the doctors and nurses are saying to you. Ask questions. You know you have many. But don't be rude.. or treat the nurses like shit. Don't bark out commands... these people are not your servants. I've heard other people say terrible shit to nurses. These people are in charge of making you healthy.. Do you really think it's in your best interests to piss them off ? I always try to keep my sense of humor.. and I always apologize to the folks as soon as the drugs kick in. Frankly .. I whine like a little bitch when I first go in the ER. So as soon as I'm under control. The vomiting has stopped. I can catch my breath again. I say thank you and tell them how much I appreciate their care and patience. Be nice to the nurse. Make that your mantra at the hospital. It pays off 10 fold for you. Nurses take care of several people each day. Who do you think they take better care of? Cranky old man? Or charming gentleman who is suffering so badly? Nurses love me. Be nice to the nurse. It's rule #one. The add on to that is.. be nice to office staff. They can make your life much easier.. for the same reasons. They gets lots of people calling for appointments and information all day. And who do you think gets prioritized? The funny old guy who knows their names ! Over the cranky old ass who's always complaining! Be nice.. I know you're sick.. 2- BE AN INFORMED PATIENT from the very first time you get thrust into healthcare.. for whatever reason.. PAY ATTENTION ! Try to understand what's going on.. what's happening to you. You may not have much to say at first.. if you're sent to emergency surgery like I was.. you dont get time to make decisions.. you really just do what they tell you. But after you start to recover.. use that time to inform yourself. Learn as much as you can about what is happening to you. Usually it's not that hard to understand. But I've had people tell me about immediately life threatening situations with this kinda confused look on their faces. "The doctor said something about a massive cormilary.. or corbery.. something about my heart.. and I gotta go to this other guy.. so he can test something.. and I might need pills or an operation or some such" MY God! Its called a coronary.. you had a freaking heart attack! And that doesnt have your undivided attention?!! I know learning stuff is hard.. and being sick is not fun. But it's funner than being dead! Get a clue what's happening to you. Its rule #2 ! 3- BE AN INFORMATIVE PATIENT if you get sick like I did.. you might wanna make yourself a couple lists. List 1 is every symptom you think you might have. Try to be descriptive about what you're feeling. Is it a burning pain? Or stabbing? Or cramping? You may not have an immediate point of reference.. just give it your best guess. Don't leave out that burning sensation everytime you play with yourself. Tell your doctor EVERYTHING. Its important that he knows it all.. and you aren't as interesting as you think you are. He's heard this before. You have to have full disclosure here. List 2. All medications.. vitamins.. supplements.. etc. that you take . If you swallow it or put it in or on your body. Put it on the list. Also. Lots of times they need to know your typical diet. Keep track if it the week before your appointment. Be honest. If you ate at McDonald's 6 times last week.. its probably important for them to know that. I'll add a third list.. a list of all and any questions you can think of.. write them down as the questions pop up in your head. That way, at the appointment.. the doctor knows what is on your mind.. that helps a lot. So.. rule#3 here's all about me. That's the big three! Three simple rules or guidelines to make your life easier if you end up sick or injured. 1- BE NICE 2- BE INFORMED 3- BE INFORMATIVE There's probably lots of little tips for people like me who are frequent fliers. But that'll be a different post. This list is for the newbies. Every day almost.. someone does an admit request for our support sites.. they're newly diagnosed and are overwhelmed with information. It's was amazing the shear volume of information that came at me when I first got sick. Most people were blissfully ignorant about where poopy comes from.. that whole digestion trip. I knew every organ involved. Every inch. I know what villi do ! I can spell gastroenterologist without spell check. 30 years ago.. the available information was much less easy to come by. Today you have almost instant answers for any disease. Use it. Make your life easier. A little life lesson from a dead man who's still talking... PRIOR PLANNING PREVENTS POOR PERFORMANCE. Be well my friends