#and i was JUST telling a friend that we gotta resist starting internet fights sometimes for our own mental health

[naomiknight-17]

My day started by being woken by Leon knocking over the garbage bin, then I was further disturbed by a phone call from the doctor's office when I specifically asked not to be called in the morning, then I had to cancel my plans for the day due to the weather, then I came on Tumblr and someone got nitpicky about how I phrased something regarding Dungeon Meshi

I am in such a mood to fight someone rn I gotta restrain myself

Maybe I should go do some dishes

[winterironspiderling]

Here is Starker with #85 “Can you come get me?” @fogdog1738​

This prompt kind of got away from me and turned into a public relationship reveal? Hope you like it!

Summary: Peter is 17 and dating Tony already, but they have to keep it a secret. Flash gets under Peter’s skin at Decathlon practice which prompts him to ask Tony to come get him. Tony doesn’t just wait for Peter in the car...

Nobody at school knew Peter was Spider-Man and much more than the nerdy teenager they presumed him to be. He didn’t play sports or react to the bullying anymore than he’d used to, even though he could be an all-star and beat anyone up who crossed his path if he wanted. Sometimes it was hard not to let his strength come out when Flash got in his face.

He was struggling more than usual during Decathlon practice when a question had come up about the Avengers and the Accords. It was already a touchy subject for him because he’d experienced the fight firsthand, and it would’ve been touchy for him anyway because of Tony’s involvement. Long before the man had ever recruited him, and before they’d started dating, Peter had been a fan and supporter.

“Oh, ask Penis all about this,” Flash mocked. “He knows all the Avengers. Isn’t that right?”

Peter rolled his eyes. All because Ned had outed him for knowing Spider-Man via the Stark Internship. He wasn’t mad at his friend for it since he couldn’t blame him for wanting to talk about something so cool, but it was inconvenient. Now it was another thing Flash could tease him about.

“Come on, Parker,” Flash pressed. “Name who was Team Cap and who was Team Iron Man. You’re bff’s with Spidey, so you already know that one, and I’ll give you a hint about another person on the team...it’s in the name. Starts with I. Two words.”

“Would you just shut up?“ Peter blurted.

Even Flash looked a little surprised at his reaction before his face turned even more smug. Getting a reaction was just what he’d wanted. Usually Peter could resist, but not about this.

“Did I hit a sore spot?”

Peter got up from his place at the table next to Mr. Harrington who was no help as usual besides saying, “settle down,” halfheartedly.

“Cap hit Iron Man in his sore spot,” Flash continued. “What else happened in Germany? Tell us. Since you’re the expert.”

“That’s enough, Flash,” Mr. Harrington said. “Peter can’t say anything even if he did know. Probably part of a confidentiality agreement with Stark Industries. Ohh, that’s a good question. I’m gonna write that down.”

Peter glared at Flash, fists balled at his side before he composed himself, grabbed his backpack and left the room. There was no point in giving into Flash’s attempts. It wouldn’t get him anywhere, and if it came down to a fistfight, Peter didn’t want to accidentally kill him. Sometimes it was tempting to tell everyone the truth about his identity just to get them to shut up, but he shouldn’t have to do that. Telling everyone that he was Spider-Man to get Flash to stop didn’t feel like a win. It would be better if Flash found out after high school was done. Let him regret unknowingly making a complete fool of himself in front of his favourite superhero.

Peter wasn’t in the mood to walk home or to wait around for May to pick up the phone, so he called Happy. Of course it went straight to voicemail because no matter how much he and the man bonded, Happy was still a dick.

“Happy, pick up pick up pick up pick up pick up,” Peter groaned into the phone. “I could be dying.”

Peter pressed the end call button in frustration. What good was having a driver on call if he never answered. Just like May whose cell phone was a complete waste since she always forgot she had it. Typical.

“Whatever, guess I’m walking.”

His phone lit up with Tony’s picture and played his special ringtone.

“Hello?”

“Oh good, you’re not dead,” Tony responded.

“Hey,” Peter said. “Not yet.”

“What’s up?”

“I’m at school.”

“Is that the full problem?” Tony wondered.

Peter sighed. “It’s just Flash again. I sort of left practice early.”

“I’m getting sick of hearing about him.”

“Sorry.”

Tony huffed. “Not because you’re telling me. Because there should be nothing to tell.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Peter said. “Anyway, that’s all. I was just calling Happy for a ride, but I’m gonna walk, unless... Uhm, can you come get me?” Peter knew it was a lot to ask. Tony was a busy man and had better things to do than come pick him up from school. Even though they were together now, it wasn’t like Tony could be seen lurking around a high school for no reason.

Peter expected it to be a no.

“I’ll be there in ten,” Tony said.

“Really?” Peter asked, voice equal parts grateful and shocked.

“I’d do anything for you,” Tony said easily.

Peter blushed on his end.

“Now do me a favour and go back to practice.”

“What? Why?”

“Leaving because of that idiot sets a bad precedent.”

“Fine.”

“Bye,” Tony said. The call disconnected.

Peter wasn’t happy about going back into practice, but Tony was right. He couldn’t just run away every time Flash said something stupid, or he wouldn’t be able to spend a full day at school.

“Welcome back, Peter,” Mr. Harrington said.

Ned smiled at him. “Sorry, man. Don’t listen to Flash. He’s a jerk.”

“It’s fine,” Peter decided. “Practice is almost over anyway, no point in missing the last ten minutes.”

“Well, well, well, look who came back for more,” Flash jeered.

Peter ignored him. He felt a lot better knowing that in ten minutes he could walk out of the school and get in Tony’s car. It was almost worth Flash getting on his nerves if it meant he had an excuse to see Tony.

Peter settled into his chair and waited for MJ to continue with the questions.

Yet another question about the Accords came up, and Flash looked pointedly at Peter while he answered it.

“Wrong.”

Peter didn’t have to turn to know who that was. He knew the voice, and everyone’s identical expressions of shock told him it was someone important.

“Mr. Stark. Iron Man, oh my God,” Flash said.

Peter wanted to laugh at his classmate’s shaky voice. He almost felt bad since he knew that reaction well.

Mr. Harrington got out of his chair. “Sir, it’s an honour.”

“Thanks,” Tony said, striding up to the group.

Peter shook his head at the display even though it was admittedly awesome that Tony was here doing this.

“Hey, Pete.” Tony walked over and put a hand on the boy’s shoulder.

“Wait, you know him?” Flash asked. “For real?”

Tony narrowed his eyes. “Peter’s my boyfriend. Course I know him.”

Peter didn’t feel so smug anymore. His face burned. What the fuck? Since when was Tony planning this? They were supposed to be keeping it a secret.

“You’re joking, right?” Flash’s mouth hung open.

The only people who didn’t look quite so shocked were MJ and Ned since they knew, but everyone else looked like they were about to pass out from the drama. A few kids looked disgusted, and a few looked envious.

“Tony, what the hell?” Peter muttered. He’d wanted Tony to make a public display like this since they’d gotten together, but he’d also completely understood why that was impossible. But for Tony to show up like this without even warning him of his plans?

Peter could tell Tony was sheepish and maybe second guessing his choice, but only because he knew him well. To everyone else, Tony looked the same as he always did.

“Nope, definitely not joking,” Tony said with a smirk.

Flash looked like he was going to blow a gasket which Peter had to admit he enjoyed. This hadn’t gone down the way he’d imagined it, but he was still pleased.

When they got to the car, Tony immediately turned him. “Don’t be mad. I--”

“Tony, I cannot believe you just did that.”

Tony grimaced. “I should’ve told you I was going to, but, Pete. You have much better self control than I do.”

“How do you figure?”

“You’ve been flying under the radar, letting him pick on you to save him the embarrassment. I took one look at him and wanted to shut his entire life down. Stick it to him.”

“On your behalf, of course,” Tony added. “Now he knows you’re with me, and that’s that.”

“What happened to keeping it a secret, though. Until I was out of high school?”

“I don’t know,” Tony admitted. “If you’re not mad, I’m not mad.”

“It’s gotta be all over the internet. The whole world probably knows by now,” Peter guessed.

“Oh it does. Friday’s in my ear about it right now,” Tony agreed with a guilty smile.

Peter sighed.

“Say something. Please,” Tony urged.

“I don’t know,” Peter said. “I’m good with this. Not mad, I mean. It’s nice to have one less secret to keep.”

“Good.”

Peter nodded. “Anyway, thanks for coming to pick me up.”

“Sorry it came with a side of drama.”

“I knew what I was getting into with you,” Peter joked. “You’re a drama king.”

“True,” Tony agreed. “Next time we’ll talk about it first, so I don’t surprise you.”

“That would be nice.”

“By the way. Why didn’t you call me first?” Tony asked. “Was I last resort?”

Peter looked at him like he was crazy. “I didn’t want to bug you.”

“Peter, you’re literally a spider. It’s your job to bug me.”

Peter laughed. “I don’t know...you’re busy, and we were supposed to be hiding this, so...”

“Have there been times when you didn’t call?” Tony asked, affronted.

“Maybe.”

“Okay, now I really hate that kid,” Tony said. “And myself too.”

“It’s fine.”

Tony shook his head. “Now it’s out in the open, and you have no reason not to call me. Okay? For anything. You call me first.”

Peter nodded.

Tony looked happy

“So where are we going?” Peter asked.

“Would you hate me if I said Pepper wants a press conference?”

“No. I couldn’t hate you.”

Tony beamed. “You spoil me.”

[charmingcentry]

Lie Detector

Entry for Day 3 - 20 Questions

AO3

-

It was a trend spreading across the internet, famous celebrities are taking lie detector tests and this certainly caught Chloe’s attention.

Maybe it’s because of her new life in LA with roommate bedmate Beca Mitchell, a multi-Grammy award-winning musician and herself, a high school teacher for music theory. Surely those professions aren’t exactly on the same ranking but, it couldn’t hurt to take that lie detector test, Chloe is just fairly curious. Sometimes her curiosity breaks through people’s limits.

Taking the lie detector test was an idea suggested by her seniors, nosy ones as a matter of fact - they Facebook stalked Chloe’s college years for goodness sake. When the news spread within the redhead’s music theory classroom that she personally knew Beca Mitchell and that their teacher roomed with her, Instagram stalking came next, Chloe couldn’t do anything to can her student’s loudmouths.

“How did you two meet?”

“Did she always wanted to be a musician?”

“Is that acapella group still running?”

“Are you two in love or dating?”

“Is she always busy?”

Wait, go back.

“Are you two in love or dating?”

It was a question frequently asked by Chloe’s friends, her relatives, and even her colleagues. The redhead would always have to answer dejectedly, no; they are not dating. They do the activities that people in a relationship do, other than the sex and mouth-on-mouth kissing, but they weren’t dating. Yet, there is one part of that question Chloe is quick to respond too. She is in love with Beca Mitchell and she can’t deny any part of it.

Maybe it’s because of how blunt and straightforward the brunette is or how compassionate Beca is. Her maturity level and the brunette’s witty sense of humor is what infatuated the redhead… the little bit of cleavage when the two first met also attracted Chloe. It has been over seven years since the redhead first fell for Beca, and she probably can never get over her. -

Beca’s home, for now, taking a small hiatus from her music career after arriving home from a five-month-long tour. Chloe took Beca’s break as a chance to not only spend more time with her best friend but to take that lie detector test.

Let’s just say after a classroom full of 17 and 18-year-olds pleading for their teacher to take the test with her roommate, Chloe finally gave in.

“So Beca…” The brunette perks her head up, shoveling chocolate ice cream into her mouth, Chloe laughs at the little ice cream trickling out of the corner of her mouth. “Jeez… anyway, my students have been… inquiring some sort of, offer that you may or may not be interested in doing.” The redhead utters, wiping off the ice cream with a napkin

Beca raises an eyebrow. “That’s a weird way to put it… what is it?”

“So uh, you know those lie detector test things?” Beca nods once, stealing a spoonful of Chloe’s strawberry ice cream. “Hey!” Chloe swats Beca’s hand with her own spoon, the brunette managing to steal a spoonful, sticking her tongue out playfully. “Anyway… do you maybe like, wanna take one of those? Just for fun or something.”

“Your idea of fun is being hooked up to a machine?” Beca teases, waggling her spoon around. She immediately notices her friend’s dejected face. “Hey hey, I’m kidding, I’m kidding.” She reaches to touch Chloe’s hand. “Actually sounds pretty sweet, I’m down.”

The redhead lights up, a Cheshire Cat-like grin spreading across her face. “Awes!”

A similar smile slips onto Beca’s face, a blush spreading as well. “Yeah, awes.” Chloe scoops her spoon into Beca’s cup. “Aw come on!”

“It’s payback babe.” Chloe winks, causing the brunette to immediately shut up

“Oh, whatever… where’s are we doing that… lie detector thing?” Beca asks, finishing off her ice cream

“I asked Aubrey if she knows anyone and her cousin's wife actually does those tests (“Wait were you already planning this?”). We can do it for free it’ll be fun!” Beca nods along with Chloe’s statement. “We also get to see Aubrey~ she’ll be tagging along.”

“Yay the dictator is going see me sweating my ass off,” Beca remarks sarcastically, throwing her cup in a trash can behind her.

“Oh please, as long as you answer the questions properly you’ll be fine. And Aubrey won’t be asking anything, just watching.” Beca lets out a monotone cheer. “I know you love her.”

“I do, she just… scares me.” Chloe drops her jaw. “Tell her I swear to god Beale I’ll still tell people you sleep with a nightlight.”

“Touche… anyway come on, let’s go before paparazzi ruin our hangout.” Chloe adds as she walks out the door, Beca still inside the ice cream shop.

“Yeah… hangout.”

The brunette follows Chloe down the street as they make their way to a nearby shopping mall to look for a wedding gift for Amy - she and Bumper somehow reconnected and got back together and are now marrying. Beca feels Chloe’s arm link around hers and finds herself more enlightened when making physical contact with her friend.

“Better tell the truth when the day comes Bec.” Chloe teases as the two strolls into a jewelry store. Beca rolls her eyes.

“Same thing for you Chlo… same thing for you.”

--

“Beca come on we don’t want to be late! Aubrey is already downstairs waiting.” Chloe yells, tapping her foot impatiently. She hears a thud come from the bedroom she shares with Beca and hears footsteps rapidly sprinting down the hall. She arrives at the door, breathing heavily as she stores a paper in her back pocket. “What is that?”

The brunette pushes Chloe out the door slightly and locks their apartment unit. “Questions I’ll be asking you. I thought I lost it.” The redhead slowly peers over Beca’s shoulder and the brunette begins to speed walk. “Nuh-uh Beale, gotta wait!”

Chloe lets out a frustrated groan as she puts her own list of questions into her purse. She calls the elevator to go downstairs to the condo building’s main lobby, Aubrey has been waiting for the two of them for about half an hour. The minute the elevator lands, the redhead squeals of excitement when she notices her blonde friend sitting on one of the chairs in front of the desk. The two share a tight embrace, swaying back and forth dramatically while a smile washes over Beca’s face. Aubrey notices the shorter girl and wraps her in a hug as well, the two are good friends after all.

“Let me guess… Beca was the one not ready?” Before Beca could intervene, Chloe nods enthusiastically as they all walk to Aubrey’s car. “Expected… you were late to nearly every Bellas practice.”

“Hey! My dorm building is across the campus from where we held rehearsals… and you're lucky I even went.” The blonde rolls her eyes with her smile widening as she starts the car. “But, glad to see you, Posen, it’s been a hella long time.”

“You too Beca. Now come on, I wanna see you two try to lie to one another.” The three pull out of the condo’s parking lot building as Aubrey inserts the directions to her cousin’s wife’s clinic, starting the route once the car has merged onto the main road. Although the passenger seat was empty, with the exception of notebooks and binders containing financial information about Aubrey’s lodge, Chloe sat in the backseat with the brunette, keeping her best friend company.

“How’s the lodge doin’ Posen? Last time we went was that retreat.” Beca asks, admiring the views from the moving car.

“Pretty good, it’s fun to yell at people every day other than the sore throat. How was the tour? Sorry I couldn’t make it to any of them…” Beca waves her hand dismissively

“All’s good, Chloe told me when she came to like… five of my shows was it?” Beca questions, turning her head towards Chloe who is fighting back a smile.

“Amy bought all those tickets! But yeah… I missed you! It’s lonely at home without you…”

Aubrey lets out a laugh. “The way you two talk, it’s like an old married couple.” The blonde raises an eyebrow at Chloe through the rearview mirror, merging the car onto the freeway. The redhead blushes and laughs nervously

“You’re not wrong… we had an argument about who was cooking dinner one time.” Beca adds, looking back and forth at Chloe and Aubrey through the rearview mirror. “Even though I burn everything except for Mac N Cheese.”

“Except that one time back in Brooklyn… you made Amy and me some dinner and we came home to the fire alarm blaring. We could hear it from down the hall!”

Beca and Chloe harmlessly bicker and tease one another back and forth throughout the entire car drive with Aubrey laughing along with every remark said. The two really did argue like an old married couple, the result of avoiding to tell each other about their major crushes on one another.

-

“Nice to meet you two, and Aubrey, lovely to see you again. My name is Madelaine and I will help conduct the lie detector test between you two.” The auburn-haired colored lady leads the group into a room where the polygraph is waiting. “I will be reading any sort of microscopic changes to your breathing patterns, sweat, and also blood.” Beca gulps loudly at the last word, she wasn’t very fond of blood - she once fainted after scraping her knee badly as a teenager. “Who will be going first?”

Chloe raises her hand up slightly. “I will.” Madelaine smiles at sits Beca and Chloe down on two chairs, the auburn lady grabbing the equipment for the polygraph examiner. “I will be placing these rubber tubes around your chest and abdomen, these will read your breathing patterns.” Chloe lifts her arms up as Madelaine wraps the air-filled tubes around her body. “Next up is the blood pressure cuff and, of course, will be reading your blood.” She wraps the cuff around Chloe’s upper arm. “And finally, this is the galvanic skin resistance, it will be reading the sweat emitting off of your fingertips.” After Chloe was finished being equipped in the lie detector gear, Madelaine takes a seat at the other end of the table. “Let’s start off with some basics… is your hair color really red?”

“Yes.”

Madelaine gives a thumbs-up. “Is your name really Chloe Beale?”

“Yes.”

The auburn lady smiles at signals Beca to start. Even if the brunette isn’t the one being tested, she is still sweating crazily from nervousness. She turns to Aubrey who is watching the whole event from the corner of the room, smiling at the brunette. Beca turns back to Chloe and pulls out her list of 10 questions.

“Do you enjoy living with me?” Beca asks lowly, looking at her friend straight in the eye.

“Yes.” Madelaine puts a thumbs-up after a moment of silence.

Beca moves down her list. “Have you ever held a party at our place without me knowing?”

The redhead tugs at her bottom lip and the corners of her mouth perked up. “Yes.” Madelaine gives another thumbs-up. “Just the Bellas, nothing too big.” Beca lets out a sigh of relief.

“Do you wish I was home more often?”

Without skipping a beat, Chloe responds. “Yes.” A thumbs-up comes from the polygraph examiner. Beca frowns a bit.

“Aw… I’m sorry. I’ll try to be home more.” The redhead smiles brightly at Beca. “Alright, number four… did you actually like me when you first met me?” The polygraph examiner pen frantically moves. “Friend-wise.” The pen slows back down to its regular pace.

“Yes, yes I did.” Beca turns to Madelaine and is given a thumb-up.

“Aw, see Aubrey I wasn’t that hateable.” The brunette says, turning to her friend who is watching from afar. Aubrey rolls her eyes and shoos Beca away with her hand.

Beca focuses her gaze back on Chloe. “Do you like my puns?”

The redhead mouths ‘sorry.’ “No.” An astonished brunette snaps her head towards Madelaine who gives a thumbs-up. “Your puns are just so bad sweetie.” Beca rolls her eyes as she moves further down the list.

“Oh, whatever… I know you love them… they’re punderful.” Chloe shoots a glare at her friend. “Hehe, sorry. Okay, do you really believe Lilly was possessed by Satan?” Beca notices the horrified expression that developed on Madelaine’s face. “Long story…”

Chloe slightly laughed and cleared her throat. “Oh definitely. Yes.” Madelaine narrows her eyes at the two and slowly raises a thumbs-up.

“Alright, number 7. Were you jealous of how much time I spent with Jesse back in Barden?” The brunette inquiries.

Chloe is taken aback by the sudden change of questions but remains calm. She knows she can’t lie, so she doesn’t. “Yes.” Madelaine gives Beca a thumbs-up.

“To be fair… I did want to spend more time with you…” That washes a smile over the two’s faces. “Anyway, you’re almost done uh. Okay, did you really fail Russian Lit three times just to be a Bella?”

Beca notices Aubrey break out into a coughing fit when the question was asked and Chloe goes pale. The brunette turns back around from a somewhat choking Aubrey and sees the redhead, hesitant to answer as the pens frantically move across the paper. “I… no.” The redhead says. Madelaine gives a thumbs-up.

Beca tugs at her bottom lip before reading the next one. “Did you ever date Chicago?”

“No.” It was true, the two never dated even after that passionate kiss.

“Final question then. Are you in love with someone right now?” Beca notices the polygraph pens rapidly write against the paper and then resume to its regular pattern. Chloe takes a deep breath and looks Beca straight in the eye.

“Yes.”

“Who i-

“Those were all true, good job, Chloe,” Madelaine says, as she detaches the equipment from Chloe’s body, the redhead lets out a gigantic sigh of relief of the test being over and done with. She develops an evil smile as Beca is hooked up to the machine. She looks over at Aubrey who nods her head in the general direction of Beca. Chloe’s smile only grows wider. After the test questions with Beca were over, the redhead pulls her own list out.

“Did you really want to become a Bella at first?”

Beca’s face scrunches. “No… but I don’t regret it, it was the best thing that ever happened to me.” Chloe laughs at how panicked the last part sounded as Madelaine gives a thumbs-up.

“Don’t worry Beca, that’s all good. Alright, do you enjoy the fame?”

“Yes… actually… no.” Madelaine says to say it once more clearly. “No.” Madelaine gives a thumbs-up. “Takes up too much of my time and it’s exhausting. But the fans are worth it.”

Chloe smiles gently at her friend. “Do you like sharing a bed with me?” She notices how red Beca’s face turns as Aubrey opens her mouth in surprise.

“N-no,” Beca utters, Chloe already knowing it was a lie. Madelaine gives a thumbs-down. “Fine, I do…”

“Aw, Bec~” The redhead clears her throat after Beca shoots her a glare. “Okay okay… do you miss your ‘ear monstrosities?’” Chloe asks air quoting the last words that were said.

“No.” Madelaine gives a thumbs-up. “It was a lot of weight on my ears actually.”

“Did you change at all when you dated Jesse?”

“I- yes I did.” Chloe frowns a bit. “It’s fine really…” Madelaine gives Chloe a thumbs-up.

“Do I ever make you uncomfortable?”

Beca furrows her eyebrows a bit. “No.” Chloe feels relieved and quite surprised to see Madelaine give Chloe another thumbs-up… she really thought the brunette would lie more.

“Number seven… do you enjoy it when I hug you?”

The tips of Beca’s ears go red as the polygraph examiner pens start writing rapidly. “Yes…” Madelaine gives an amused thumbs-up, laughing slightly at how flustered Beca was by the question.

“Good to know… did Jesse really break up because of the long-distance?”

Beca gulps as she looks anywhere else except for Chloe’s eyes, she knows she can’t lie at this point. “No.” The redhead glances over at Aubrey who is smirking. “Do you love someone at the moment Beca.”

There was a moment of silence. “Yes.”

There’s no going back. “Is that someone me Beca?”

Beca looks over at Chloe for one moment then back to the floor. “Yes. Yes, it is.”

Madelaine detaches Beca from the machine, saying she passed all the questions except for the one. The auburn lady waves goodbye to the three, giving Aubrey a hug. Beca and Chloe remain silent for a bit until the blonde leaves to go to the bathroom. Chloe turns to face Beca, but the brunette is the first one to open her mouth.

“For my last question… is that someone me? Only fair for you to answer since I did…”

Chloe smiles gently at the brunette before taking her hand. “Yes, it is you. For so many years, it’s always been you.” The brunette tugs Chloe closer and wraps her arms around her neck, pulling in her crush for a tight embrace. “I love you so much Beca…”

“I- I love you too Chlo.”

Beca looks up at the redhead and smiles. Chloe is the one to close the aching gap between the two’s faces, planting her lips onto Beca’s. Her lips are soft against Chloe’s and are kissing back with the same amount of passion as the redhead. Chloe could feel as if she could cry because she’s finally gotten the girl she’s been head over heels for. They pull away hesitantly and slowly when they hear Aubrey’s heels come back from down the hall. After seeing the two pressing foreheads with one another, the blonde knew what was happening.

A lie detector test wasn’t so bad after all.

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S3 Ep 9: So Tristan Died

Been resisting that springtime urge to buy a house plant and watch it slowly die while everyone else on my timeline posts beautiful terrariums and wallscapes. I have murdered nearly every plant I own, I have no idea why, I have killed several cacti. But I just found out about logees.com and y’all. Have you seen a rock fig? I want it so bad.

So, instead of wasting my money, I will write here and...not click buy on that rock fig. That beautiful beautiful rock shaped plant. That incredible and glorious miniature Deku Tree.

Also, this week Tumblr said that they’re extending the post limit size for text posts and like...there was a text post limit? Y’all I assumed these posts were hella long, (and in fact way, way, way too long) but like, I never capped a text post limit so...I guess I do all right.

So, switching over to Yugioh, we’re back with the Tristan-Duke-Serenity trio, who are still fighting over Serenity, the world’s most oblivious child. I haven’t gone over too much what their high and low points have been over these past like 5ish episodes but here’s what they’ve been up to, a refresher course of what they’ve been doing since Tristan drowned a Rhinoceros turtle in the lake.

1.) Serenity sneezed once and the Tristan and Duke had a big fight over who gave Serenity a cold

2.)

Sorry that’s all they’ve done. I really thought this would be a list when I started.

It’s been so boring that Serenity has decided this has been the best part of her tourney vacation (she is not wrong). And I just realized--she went to great lengths to get her eyes fixed and now she’s trapped in the VR zone and she doesn’t even need eyes to be here. Hell, if she gets trapped here, she’ll never need eyes again, she’ll have permanent perfect vision 24/7. We keep finding new alternatives instead of spending millions of dollars on Serenity’s eyes and the show kind of glazes over it.

Anyways, we learn a lot about Serenity this episode, mainly that Serenity is a little bit of a space cadet.

(Every episode Duke’s necklace is a little bit more simplified and today it is...almost just a cross. I look forward to seeing what necklace’s final form will be.)

Duke is supposed to be the antagonist of the three, but it really comes off that Tristan and Serenity have goldfish memories and somehow do not recall being launched down a hyperspace tube by five insane computer ghosts trying to consume their bodies. Most people would not forget that happening so like...it’s kinda hard not to side with Duke. Weird that the guy with such ridiculous hair is actually the most level headed person here.

And honestly, if Yugi had been speaking, then Joey and Serenity would have sobered up. Kind of a bummer that Duke doesn’t have the card cred, although Tristan was there when Duke beat Joey.

Like this episode was somewhat frustrating because Duke Devlin really is supposed to be incredibly good at cards, a kid who has only been beaten by the Pharaoh himself, and Tristan and Serenity sort of don’t believe him for some reason. Duke owns a version of the game they are playing. Like, he has ownership over Dungeon Dice and they don’t...care? It’s really weird, but it’s not like Duke has really done anything for an entire season so maybe he deserved this?

But considering that he’s been running for his life/kidnapped since they met up again 2 days ago during Kaiba’s tourney, maybe Duke just has no choice but to hang out with these people who do not respect him at all.

(read more under the cut)

Also, they’re still keeping it a secret that Duke beat Joey because...they’re still lying out of their ass for Serenity’s self esteem. It’s Season 3 and we’re still very concerned that Serenity cannot handle the truth. This girl was in a hospital for weeks and completely blind, I’m pretty sure if anyone can handle hard truths, it’s this girl. But, she’s very pretty, so better not spook her.

I am impressed that this random throwaway plot point from the beginning of S2 has come back to haunt us.

It checks out. This was about as much credentials that Joey had when he joined Pegasus’ tourney. I mean, Joey trained with Grandpa but Grandpa full on died in the middle of their training so...Tristan should have been fine this episode, he’s been interning with card people for like...years.

Anyways, this is where everyone else is.

And Noah decides to try his carrot-under-a-box trick that has so far worked on literally every child he has tried it on.

These kids cannot resist a door to save their lives--and that’s really the whole thing. If they resist the door, then boom, their lives are saved. But nah. Gotta open every door. So they enter, and behind this door is, you guessed it--their favorite place, the ever recurring supervillain of all of Yugioh,

Wow.

Anyways, the fourth of the Big 5 is here and he is a robot that’s gonna do some Russian ballet to the Nutcracker Suite.

Finally, someone who’s strong enough to safely do the ballet alongside Tea.

*I did not watch Gundam, I spent my Torrent days watching Cowboy Bebop and Love Hina and I remember none of it.*

Speaking of, Love Hina--that one probably didn’t age well, didn’t it?

Tristan just digging his own grave for no reason is basically the rest of this episode. Duke Devlin was their out. Duke Devlin has been primed to die for like a full season but then Tristan had to go and fight a giant robot like an idiot. Which is not a sentence I thought I’d be typing about Yugioh, the show about a haunted card game.

PS, I just remembered something. One sec, let me dig this up, something I wrote in S1 that at the time, when everything was about magic and soul snatching, seemed so outlandish that it would never actually happen.

I can’t believe that I predicted myself but at the same time was still just so wrong, because not only do they already have Gundams, they also are card playing Gundams.

This giant VR Gundam could just step on them, right? Like just step on them? I get that would be against Noah’s set of rules but like...

...just a little step.

And what’s even more nuts about this show, is that some things I knew going in, some things you can’t escape just living here on the internet, like Yugi being strapped to a saw at some point (I just didn’t realize it would be from...a clown and would have *such freakin large blades attached*, it was very sudden) and them dueling from the backs of motorcycles (which apparently isn’t even this show. Apparently dueling motorcycles is a spinoff and y’all...kind of disappointed by that). But Gundams? This universe is so zany that Gundams just went completely under the radar.

*this robot casually wearing a jumbo duel disc*

Faced with the reality of none of his friends ever take him seriously, Duke decides to find a weird compromise and asks for double duel. Thing is, this robot also can’t take Duke seriously, and so this super backfires.

Would it in fact simplify everyone’s dating life if we had a 1 in 3 situation? I mean it’s already a mess because we have two 3 in 1′s, but we could balance that right out with a 1 in 3. Then the math will be correct. Balance will be achieved.

And that was how Disaster Serenity sort of stumbled her way onto a dueling platform and killed her brother’s 2nd (3rd) best friend (4th if you count Joey’s rivalry with Kaiba).

Tristan, who’s job as a volunteer janitor is to clean up messes, could not clean up after this Wheeler hot mess.

This is a card now? OK. I see you, product placement. I see why you made Duke Devlin pick up a deck again. Just for this product. That’s fine. At least we did something with Duke Devlin. But we could have maybe used him at any point outside of dungeon dice monsters, ya? Like any point?

Anyway, Serenity explains that if they tell her exactly what to do, they will be fine, so the robot catches wind of this and does this move

Of course. Of course the abandoned warehouse is now full of lava.

Serenity doesn’t even know the rules since she was actually blind until yesterday. She recalls faintly that on the train Tristan told her the rules, and that there were stars on the card that line up with power or whatever. So she looks down at the card and goes “Ah! there are little stars on here!” she plays it, and she realizes that no one has ever told her that sometimes they are placed sideways. Basically Serenity playing this episode as a recently not blind woman would be like me playing cards as someone who fast forwards through all the shuffling.

It’s hard to say if it’s Serenity who caused all this or Tristan who didn’t just let Duke do his one job. Either way, Tristan will absolutely find a way to blame this on Duke until about the point Tristan dies. Between Tristan refusing to play ball with Duke Devlin who is actually a card expert and Serenity playing all of her cards the wrong direction, I’m fully ready for Tristan to die by the end of this episode. Boy had a million chances to just chill and let Duke do his thing so ya, kill him.

Anyways, here’s a desert brought to you by yellow ochre. A LOT of yellow ochre.

Was this also a background for an 80′s space anime?

At some point Nezbitt sat in a boat and watched Kaiba launch what appears to be nuclear missiles at a missile factory. Kaiba did say he needed to throw out the old and start over so like...do Marie Kondo the way you need to do that Marie Kondo thing, Kaiba. This clearly did not bring you joy.

Anyway, lets skip to the good stuff. That’s right this boy: dead because he couldn’t not.

As you all know, I’ve been looking forward to Duke Devlin dying for such a long time now. I’ve been waiting here, tapping my fingers delicately together all Mr Burns-style expecting that the only way they could possibly find a use for Duke Devlin--since they refuse to give him any cards--would be to die.

But guys. I forgot about Tristan.

(bro wants to point out that right above the dungeon dice card was the revive card that would have come in handy right about now.)

Truly unexpected, standing in between Serenity and Duke, the most killable of the Yugioh franchise, Tristan freakin died.

But most importantly, we’re getting very close to death 169 (nice). We skipped 69 proper (a shame) because *somebody* had to kill just a chunk of people at once, Kaiba. So...who’s it gonna be? Probably the Big 5 member who’s cosplaying around as a Sexy Fish? chances are good.

Anyway, if you just got here, we’re in Season 3, if you would like to start at the beginning in S1, click here to read my so many recaps of this show. I cannot believe how much Yugioh content is in this Yugioh show.

[midwesttiltking-blog]

10- Plain Speaking

Last installment was the sad story of Garrett’s demise. as we found out last time Klint is the villain, this week we get a small window into what he’s been doing. Hope you like it! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The abandoned GM plant in Lansing was fully lit and hummed with production. The parking lot was as empty as it ever was. Inside up-to-date robots and conveyors stretched from end to end of the plant floor. No employee walked the floor but production continued on at full speed. The body assembly area had been completely re-purposed creating machines of variable shape and size. Inside the main office two humans sat chatting. A man and a woman, the man wearing a suit with a scarf, his hair slicked back, he stood tall and slender. His hands clasped behind his back looking onto the production floor.

“I just don’t understand. Why do they resist? Why do they not see the truth and power of my knowledge?”

The woman laid out on a couch with a GameCube controller in hand playing Super Smash Bros. Melee. She had picked fox and moved frame perfect quickly eliminating the bots she was matched against. She was very slim and stood about six inches shorter than the man. She paused her game and smiled at him. “Cause Klint, nobody could possibly be as smart as you, they can’t see the world how we do.” Her tone was slightly sarcastic. The inflection and rhythm of her speech matched exactly with how Kevin spoke. “Besides, who cares we have each other. Don’t let those other people bring you down.”

“They are slowing down progress though!” smashing his fist against the wall as he turned back to the woman and crouched down to match her height “I want to make the world perfect for you Emma. I want us to live in a place where people actually value knowledge, and will take the time to learn what they don’t know, and we can have productive arguments among educated people.”

Emma reached out a hand and ruffled Klint’s hair “You shouldn’t do your hair like this, it makes you look like an anime villain, besides I think you look cute when it's just natural. Anyway, Does it really matter that much? Maybe some people should be allowed to just screw off. You know we made it this far without everyone being perfect”

Klint smiled and kissed her. He pulled out a phone and tapped a few buttons. Emma turned back to her game and began playing again her serious game face returning. Klint sat down at a desk and popped up a projection, a map of North America. He let out a deep sigh before speaking again. “OK let's review what has happened so far.”

Emma paused her game again and stood up “Oh sweet, we can really list out just how great I am at this...and how...OK your plans were.”

“Hey, I spent years crafting this plan, if it wasn’t for me you wouldn’t be here. Give me some credit at least.”

“Yeah yeah, just remember who the best is while we do this”

Klint extended an arm, pointing this his finger, “yellow” he spoke clearly, marks appeared on the map. He began shading in the Midwest.

Emma struck a comical pose learning backwards and extending her arm out, her hand shaped like a gun. “Red” she closed one eye “bang” Red marks splattered across a large portion of the south and west. She then opened her hand keeping her fingers together “fwoosh, schwing schwing” she made large lines cutting through almost all of Canada.

Klint finished filling in the east coast and shook his head. Before he could say anything Emma poked him. “See, look at my part, it's like thirty-five times bigger than yours”

“I’ll give you three maybe…”

“No way! Its definitely more than three”

“Calculate area as percent, yellow against red”

On the projection a display popped up “27% yellow 73% Red” Emma put her hands on her hips and puffed out her chest “See, you got wrecked”

“That isn't three times, sooooo”

“Doesn’t matter I still beat you so hard”

“I’m not wrong though. Besides I highly doubt your drawing is accurate, how can you even know you covered that much area and mine that isn’t overlapping with yours”

Emma sighed “Whatever Klint I don’t want to sit here and argue with you about this. Let's get to the next part”

“Green” Klint slowly drew a line starting from Portland as it moved east the line widened, splitting off at a few points. It ended just east of Omaha. He then moved over to the east coast. He began shading in near DC extending to the coast and a few cities south. The calculation still on display now showed “21% Yellow 60% Red” “These areas and that fucking internet troll account for the resistors.”

“Ah, that troll. I kind of love that guy. He's fighting for the people”

“Yeah but what is he really defending. He may be enlightened himself but he fights to defend a world of idiots sharing unverified information on the internet?”

“You gotta it admit, even if it is dangerous, The internet is really fun sometimes”

“Yeah but are those fun times worth it?”

“I think so, if you have a truly unrestricted platform like that, sure maybe it allows for some people to circulate in their stupidity, but it also opens paths for great-” Klint pressed a button on his phone and Emma fell silent.

She walked over and calmly sat down in Klint’s lap as he continued on. “The recon probes I’ve sent out show in the east a small military force has survived. They are going to be a problem. But when we have finished manufacturing the auto-tanks, we should be able to wipe them out pretty quick”

“Yah know, if we just went with my idea and waited to launch the virus until we had weapons built you wouldn’t have to deal with this uprising”

Klint playfully tickled her sides “Oh you are so smart aren’t you, you predicted that some military brat would survive.” His voice changed to a more serious tone “But waiting would have been too risky, you think I could have operated this plant when everybody was just living their day to day lives?”

“...yeah. It's an abandoned building nobody has been in this thing for a millions of years until we came along”

“I just think the likelihood of someone catching us coming in here was too high”

Emma sighed “OK, I don’t care, your plan didn’t work. So obviously there were better options”

“No but seriously, how could we have pulled it off?”

“Klint. I don’t care.”

“Alright alright, this line in the west though, that is what has me concerned.”

“Ah yes the ‘all of our hard work undone by seemingly normal people’ line”

“Yes… How the fuck are these people surviving. Most of the cities are stable, nobody is rioting or murdering each other, no zombies within their city limits. It just doesn’t make sense!”

“Maybe they stopped the zombies using the power of positivity” Emma jumped out of the chair and pointed to the ceiling “They never gave up hope and they took all of your silly survival calculations and threw them out the window! They made the impossible possible”

Klint laughed off the idea “Oh yeah, that thing Kevin was always going on about, how any human has the potential to be truly great if they believe in themselves”

Emma tilted her head “Who is Kevin?”

Klint looked at her with a confused expression “I’ve told you about him before. He is like you, but you know, a guy.” Klint paused for a second his voice now becoming somber “He was my best friend before the outbreak”

Emma wrapped her arms around Klint “Don’t worry, well get to see him eventually Right? When we meet him Ima destroy him in smash bros. If he is just like me a bet he’s pretty good”

Klint looked at her for a moment “yeah… yeah I’ll get to see him again. But I just don’t know if he’ll ever be the same.”

He took another deep breath “What do we do about this green line?”

“Well we can’t just march out there and tell them ‘give up, kill yourselves!’ So we just have to keep watching the recon reports until we figure out how they are doing this”

“You are right, there has to be something logical to explain what is happening here. I’m just really surprised people are surviving out there without structure. I figured most women didn’t really have the skills to survive in the wild”

“Why does it have to be women?” Emma turned to look at him, her face a few degrees away from rage.

“Well a lot of girls just aren’t really brought up to have skills you’d need, yah know like hunting, making shelter stuff like that”

“Oh and guys are any different. Don’t most of you just sit around playing video games or jerking off”

“Hey now, plenty of guys still learn those skills though, even if it is just recreational”

“Tell me Klint” Emma put her hand gently under his chin “Who cooks dinner every night, me or you? Who would do that for you without society?” Klint turned to his phone again and the conversation ended.