#and i say it as a person that thinks that a lot of the pet trade in general is rotten and irresponsible
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aidansloth · 2 days ago
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Late Nights On Kitchen Floors Sometimes Lead To Confessions
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Summary: You come home late one night to find your roommate Jason sobbing on the kitchen floor.
Warnings and A/N: some negative self-thoughts on Jason’s side. In this fic Jason is feeling a lot of feelings :) because we love our men crying and traumatized. Pre-relationship! This is my first time writing for Jason so I hope I did him justice. Written in the second person, gender neutral reader, I tried to make reader as inclusive as possible so if I missed something please let me know! JUSTKNOW that my heart broke while writing this. (final note, I wrote this at 4am so don’t judge me)
Words: 0.9k
I also posted this on ao3 if you want!!
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You secure the last of the locks on your door as you start to take your boots off along with your coat. Immediately as you stepped in your mind went into autopilot, following your routine so effortlessly that only after what was definitely too many seconds do you notice a heaving sound coming from your kitchen. 
“Jason?”
The words leave your mouth with a tinge of hope that it was just him and not a break-in you’d have to deal with at this ungodly hour in the morning. You check the time with a flick of your phone. 2:14am. 
You receive no response and reach for the bat Jason insisted you left hidden in the umbrella stand. You can never be too safe were his exact words and you’d honestly have to thank him if you made it out tonight. It’s only when you cross the door that you see him: Jason and all of his 6 feet of muscles are scrunched up into a wavering ball, his hands clutching his clothes and his head planted into his knees. All this time you’ve known him and yet he has never looked as vulnerable as he does now, on your dusty crumble-covered floor with tears in his eyes. 
At first no words come out of your mouth, how could they? You’ve talked to Jason just a couple of hours ago on your phone, he called saying he just wanted to hear your voice. He was fine earlier. He was. He asked how your day was. He listened, hanging off your every word. But now here he was in front of you, a broken shell of a man.
Trying to not startle him you get closer and call out his name again. This time he hears you.
He lifts his head and you can see smudged tear stains all over his face probably from an attempt to erase them. An hiccup escapes him and your heart breaks. 
“Oh baby,” you scooch in front of him and take his face in your hands. 
“What happened? What’s wrong?”
He can’t speak. The words are jabbed in his throat, threatening to suffocate him. He opens his mouth but nothing other than a strangled sound comes out. You start petting his hair.
“Hey, hey, it’s fine, you don’t have to say anything alright?” 
You settle on the floor and try to maneuver his body onto yours, his head on your shoulder. His body adapts to yours, his arms wrap around you and he feels like everything is going to be alright. One of your hands runs up and down his spine in a soothing manner while the other is nestled in his hair. 
A couple of minutes pass and you’re still holding him. Jason thinks he likes it. Being held, that is. 
After some more time his head lifts from your shoulder and your hands move to his forearms, caressing the skin there. He takes a deep, shuddering breath before speaking.
“I, ehm…” Jason’s gaze lays low and his hands start to play with yours. “I have to tell you something.” 
You nod and tell him to take his time. He bites his lip, still looking down. 
“I- Fuck, I messed this up. I really did. This was gonna be so much more romantic I swear. I was gonna- I was gonna invite you to that one bookstore we always go to, I was going buy you all the books you set your eyes on and- and I planned a walk through the park- the one- the one you like-” his voice keeps breaking and hiccuping, “-and walk through the flowerbeds and maybe if the day had gone well I would have had the courage to hold your hand.” he wipes a tear off his face with the palm of his hand. 
You try to speak but he speaks first.
“I like you. I really really like you. I wanted to do this well, tomorrow, but- I don’t know. I got too much in my own head and I’m-” Jason bites his lip and tears fill his eyes again, “I’m really sorry this is how I confess, you deserve so much better, so much better and I’m a mess and, and-” you grab his face and force him to look at you. 
“Jason Peter Todd, you listen to me carefully.” his big teary eyes look at your stern ones, “The only reason I’m not kissing you right now is because you deserve a beautifully romantic first kiss because you like beautifully romantic things. You deserve all the wonderful things this world has to offer.”
Jason thinks his heart has never felt so warm. 
“Wha-what?”
His words make you giggle and now he thinks his heart might actually implode. 
“I like you.”
“I like you too.”
Now your giggle turned into a proper laugh which made Jason smile. 
“Yeah, that was pretty obvious from the earlier declaration of love.” Now he’s giggling too. 
“Does that ehm- does that mean you want to be my girlfriend?” You giggle again at the innocence in his voice and Jason thinks he’d die all over again just for a chance to hear you laugh one more time.
“Yes, yes it does. Only if you take me to that date you were talking about though.”
He smiles. “We could go now.”
Your eyes widen. “Now? At 2am?”
He shrugs. “I’m Red Hood. Nothing bad is gonna happen.”
You scoff. “Yeah alright, but I think the bookstore might be closed.”
“Ah. Right. Tomorrow then.”
“Eager?”
His smile only gets bigger. “Duh, I have a girlfriend to take out.”
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Thank you for reading!! Constructive criticism/advice is always welcome!
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anything-4-0ur-moony · 3 days ago
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since people hate american marauders, fuck you, they’re now all from various states and most of them are involved in greek life in some way shape or form
barty says he’s from nyc but he’s a fucking liar. he is from an even richer even more pretentious part of upstate new york but one person assumed the city when he said he was from new york and he decided that was cooler and rolled with it. in a frat mostly to piss off his dad, always drunk or on something, still has a 4.0
dorcas is ACTUALLY from nyc. she’s majoring in polisci but is minoring in fashion cause it’s fun and she’s good at it
marlene is from a tiny town in tennessee, very conservative, VERY christian, really comes into herself at college although there is a LOT of religious trauma to work through
mary is from south carolina, she’s very much like a southern belle, make sweet tea that will rot your teeth type, 1000% in a sorority. she’s studying english or education and minoring in art, probably painting focused but she won’t be an art teacher
james is THE frat bro, like his dad and his dad’s dad and his dad’s dad’s dad were in this frat. he will be president eventually but for his freshman/sophmore years frank was president (james has a bit of a crush on him and did not realize) he’s studying sports medicine or social work and plays soccer
the black brothers are from massachusetts they went to some disgustingly expensive private schools, different schools though, either because sirius became awful after going to boarding school or because of trans!reg, your choice.
sirius joined the same frat as james, it’s the rival frat to his father’s so there’s some shit there. he isn’t on the soccer team because soccer wasn’t “sophisticated enough” for the blacks (he can fence and ski like a motherfucker though) but he does play soccer recreationally
regulus is studying law or finance or business or something equally awful because his parents made him, it’s soul crushing and he hates it but he is really good at it (as he is everything) he wants to study philosophy and will eventually switch when he gets out from under his parents thumb
lily and snape are from new england, i can’t think of like a specific place but it’s smaller and poorer, lily would be in an academic sorority but snape has a vendetta against greek life (cause he didn’t get any bids) and has also made lily very against it (hence her hatred for the marauders) her issues with petunia stem from pet not getting into the college, asking lily to stay behind with her, and lily just needing to get out of that small town
everyone loves texas remus but may i offer you like farm kid montana remus, his family has enough land and he was always busy enough that he never really got to interact with kids his age, maybe an accident with an animal that gave him his scars. he goes to college and joins a frat because growing up almost completely alone, that idea of unwavering brotherhood really appeals to him. he’s studying classics (shocker) which causes some fights with his dad who wanted him to do something more agricultural
peter is from illinois, it was a big deal for him to move out out state for college and join a frat since no body really expected anything from his life. he’s studying math. i think his storyline would kind of be like california by chappell roan, he really wanted the city to work out but it’s just not and he wants to go home. the city brings out the worst in him and he ends up becoming the worst version of himself to try and be liked
evan and pandora are from florida but moved all over because of their dad’s business. pandora is studying art (duh) with a minor in philosophy which is how she meets reg. evan is studying engineering, i’m thinking mechanical but i’m not too sure
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mononijikayu · 20 hours ago
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don’t they know it's the end of the world (cause you don’t love me anymore) — geto suguru.
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You blinked, the knot in your chest tightening as you took in his face, his solemn expression that didn’t match the usual carefree look he wore. Was he already saying goodbye in some way? You shook your head slowly, the smile coming to your lips, though it carried a mixture of sadness and certainty. "Sugu, how could you even think about that?… I could never forget about you."  “It can happen, you know. Life happens.” He smiles in a small timid manner.   Your voice was soft, but there was no doubt in it. "No, you’re wrong. You’re the most important person in my life. How could I forget someone like you?"
GENRE: alternate universe - canon divergence;
WARNING/S: gen, afab! reader, angst, fluff, friendship, friends to lovers, eventual romance, slice of life, conflicted feelings, hurt/comfort, sad ending, physical touch, pet names (sugu, buttercup) mentioned character death, depression, mourning, loneliness, pain, grief, internal conflict, post-hidden inventory at the end, letting go, break up, meeting each other again, depiction of childhood, depiction of romance, depiction of internal conflict, depiction of complicated relationship, depiction of loneliness, mention of grief, depiction of depression, mention of internal conflict, non! sorcerer reader, sorcerer! suguru;
WORD COUNT: 10k words
NOTE: im soon back at university, so im rush writing everything and so im exhausted all the time too. so if im not updating, its because im probably regretting my life decisions. though, in any case, i will still publish as much as i can. im about two/three finished with valentines fics, but im tortured by sukuna because i have a standard with him and i can't escape it. anyway, i wrote this for suguru's birthday. he would have been thirty-five today!!! i hope you enjoy this fic!!! i love you all!!! see you on the sixth!!! <3
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IF YOU COULD DESCRIBE WONDER, IT WOULD BE BEING BY SUGURU’S SIDE. No one else could understand it, you like to think. What the two of you had, it was certainly a language made for two. It was a life that was built for the purpose of being known by you both. And you like to think that he feels the same way too.
You and Suguru had been together since you were kids, bound by an unspoken connection that neither of you ever questioned. Because, there was nothing to question about it. Nor could words even describe it all. It was too unique, too intriguing. And yet, it only belonged to the two of you.
It all started on a warm afternoon at the school playground, where laughter and shrieks filled the air as children ran around in endless games of tag. It was a long while ago, and yet it felt like yesterday to you. You could feel your eyes twitching as you watched from where you stood, permeating with desire and anxiety. 
You had been standing alone for a while, just a bit near the jungle gym, watching all the kids giggle and run about, with the zeal of youth dashing along with them.
As you watched them there with eager eyes, you kept wishing you could join in too, you wished you could run amok with joy too. But that heavy weight of fear blossoms your hesitation. It held you back from a lot of things, including making friends.
Yet, why wouldn’t you feel like this? You were new in town, and you didn’t know these kids. You didn't know any life lived in this place before you had come. Everything was new for you, as much as you were sure it would also be new to them. 
How would they even react to you, knowing you aren’t a familiar face they were already comfortable seeing? How would you interact with them, anyway? It’s not like you could just jump in and smile and just jump in easily? This is a sea and if you plunge so deep, you could drown. And you didn’t want that to happen. Not here, not when you were starting a new life. 
But then, that’s when he found you.
"Why are you just standing here?" a voice asked.
You turned to see a boy with dark hair, a little messy from running around, and warm, curious eyes. He wasn’t out of breath, despite the wild chase of tag that had just ended. His hands were shoved into the pockets of his tiny shorts, and he looked at you like he was trying to figure you out.
"I….I don’t know how to approach them." you muttered, kicking at a loose pebble. "I’m not sure how to come and tell them I want to play too, so I….."
Suguru blinked, then without hesitation, he grinned and reached out a hand to you. "I see…..Then let’s play together! I don’t care if you’re slow. I’ll just run at your speed, if that would make it easier on you."
Your eyes swiftly widened, surprised by the easy kindness in his voice. "Really?"
"Yeah!" he said enthusiastically. "I’ll even let you tag me first."
That was the beginning of everything, that was certain.
During recess, the world belonged to just the two of you. You ran hand in hand across the playground, unbothered by who was faster or slower. You hummed little tunes under your breath, and he giggled at the way you always skipped a step ahead before doubling back to him. You hopped, he ran, and sometimes, in the joy of it all, you tripped over each other’s feet and tumbled into the dirt.
And if one of you scraped a knee? The other sat down beside them without hesitation. If you fell, Suguru would plop down next to you, crossing his arms stubbornly. “I’m not playing if you’re not playing. That’s just how it is!
And you would do the same for him, because what was the fun in anything if he wasn’t right there beside you?
Nothing was ever quite complete without each other.
It wasn’t a good day unless you were together.
Even as you grew older, nothing changed.
The playground turned into quiet walks home, but your hands still found each other without thinking.
"You still hold my hand like we’re kids, Sugu," you teased one afternoon, fingers laced together as you walked home. The sun hung low in the sky, spilling warm golden light over the quiet street. Your shadows stretched long behind you, linked together like a promise.
Suguru glanced down at your hands, his grip tightening just slightly. "Yeah? You don’t like it?"
You smiled, squeezing back. "I never said that, you know!"
His grin was soft but sure, a mirror of the way he had always been with you. "Good. Because you’re still my favorite person."
And really, wasn’t that all that mattered?
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IF YOUR BIRTHDAY COULD BE A HOLIDAY, SUGURU WOULD MAKE SURE OF IT. Your birthday has always been special, you know that much. But now more than ever, especially because, for as long as you could remember, Geto Suguru had been by your side for most of it. Now, it was even more special than before. 
The years blurred together in a collage of memories: the laughter, the excitement, the simple moments that felt so big when they were shared with him. There were so many pictures, pictures of the two of you, year after year.
You were always together. His presence in every single one, a steady anchor through the passing time. One that was the only constant throughout the world that keeps on changing.
Whether it was the early mornings, when you both rushed around the house, throwing together last-minute gifts for each other in the midst of the chaos of birthday preparations, or the quiet evenings spent chatting under the stars, those moments were always colored by Suguru’s unique way of making everything feel more important. 
He never treated your birthday like just another day. To him, it was an event, something that deserved to be celebrated with the utmost care. After all, it was the day you were born—the day you were with him. And to Suguru, that meant the world.
He didn’t just show up for your birthday. 
No, he took it as seriously as he would a test. 
He planned it meticulously, down to the smallest detail, as though the day had to be perfect.
"I thought you might like this, buttercup!" he’d say with a grin, always just a little too proud of whatever thoughtful gift he managed to get you, even if you’d both picked it out together the day before. "I’m pretty sure you’ll love it." 
And every time, no matter how simple the gift, the thought behind it always felt like the most meaningful gesture.
On your birthday mornings, you’d wake up to the smell of something delicious.  The pancakes, bacon, whatever it was that he knew you’d love, always cooked with that special touch that made it taste even better. He would rush in, hands full of wrapped presents, bright eyes sparkling like a child eager to see your reaction. 
"You ready?" he’d ask, bouncing on his heels.
You couldn’t help but smile at the sight— Geto Suguru, the one who always had his life together, who always so composed, turned into a ball of excitement for just one day.
Even in the evenings, as the day began to fade and the sky turned dark, you would find yourselves sitting together outside, wrapped in blankets under the stars. He’d listen to you talk about the year that had passed, what had changed, what had stayed the same while you both sat in comfortable silence, the kind only the two of you shared.
"Make a wish, okay?" he’d say when it was time to blow out the candles, the way he’d always said it every year. But there was something about the way he said it then, with that little smile on his face, as if he already knew your wish without needing to hear it.
Suguru didn’t need grand gestures. For him, it was always about the little things, the way he made sure your favorite song was playing when you entered the room, the way he’d insist on carrying your cake even though it was ridiculously heavy, the way he refused to let anyone else help you with the birthday prep, because it was his job to make sure everything was just right for you.
And he didn’t think it was just about the day itself. To Suguru, your birthday wasn’t just a celebration of your life; it was a reminder that you existed, that you were here, and that the world—his world—was just a little bit brighter because you were in it.
Every year, as he gave you your gift, no matter how big or small, you could always see that gleam in his eyes. The beautiful gleam that said. "This is important. This is you, this is us, and I’m going to make sure you feel special, because you are."
For Suguru, your birthday wasn’t just another day in the calendar. It was the day you were born—his day to remind you just how much you meant to him, and to celebrate the fact that, all these years later, you were still by his side. 
And when you looked back at all the memories, all those years of birthdays spent with him, you couldn’t help but smile. They weren’t just your birthdays, they were his to celebrate too.
He celebrated them just as fiercely, just as passionately, as if it were his own day to remember. Because, to Suguru, every birthday spent together was a blessing. And he never took that for granted.
But this year, it felt different.
Not because of the cake or the candles. Not because of the way your friends sang off-key, their voices melding into a perfect disaster. No, this year was different because, when the party had quieted down and the night was winding to a close, Suguru handed you a small, neatly wrapped box.
He was sitting beside you on the couch, his beautiful lilac eyes watching you closely as you held the box in your hands, the soft rustle of paper the only sound between you. You could only look at the beautiful box in front of you for the longest time. He clears his throat.
“Are you really not saying anything?”
You looked at him suspiciously, fingers hesitating over the ribbon. "You didn’t have to get me anything, Sugu."
"I wanted to, buttercup." he said simply, nudging the box closer. "Go on, open it."
So you did.
Inside was a delicate silver bracelet, the light catching on the fine chain, making it shimmer. But what caught your attention was the tiny charm hanging from it—a miniature book, small enough to rest in the center of your palm, its metal etched with tiny details that made it look like it had real pages inside.
You blinked up at him, surprise evident in your expression. "Sugu…"
He looked uncharacteristically shy, rubbing the back of his neck. "It’s nothing fancy, but… I thought it’d be nice. Y’know, for us."
"For us?" you repeated, tracing your fingers over the book charm.
Suguru nodded, watching your reaction closely. "Yeah. Because we always read together. Because of all those afternoons spent sharing a book, arguing over who gets to turn the page first—"
"You always turn the page too fast, you know." you interrupted with a pout.
"And you always get distracted by random things in the margins, buttercup." he shot back, smirking. “We’re both not good at it.”
You huffed. "That’s called appreciating the details, Suguru."
"Sure, sure." he laughed, shaking his head. "Anyway, that’s the first one."
You tilted your head. "First?"
He reached over, taking your wrist gently in his hands as he fastened the bracelet around it, his touch careful, warm. "Every birthday from now on, I’m giving you a charm. One for each year. Something that means something to us."
Your breath caught for a moment.
"You’re serious?" you asked, looking up at him.
Suguru met your gaze, his expression unwavering. "Completely." Then, with a lopsided grin, he added. "You’re stuck with me for a long time, you know."
You couldn’t stop the smile that spread across your face. Everything about you just felt warm, especially when you looked at it, knowing he put a lot of thought on this beautiful present. The bracelet felt light on your wrist, but the promise it carried felt heavier. This was solid, real, unshakable. Just like your relationship with him, ironclad for all your lives.
"Good." you said, squeezing his hand before letting go. "Because I wouldn’t want it any other way."
And back then, with Geto Suguru beside you, his promise wrapped around your wrist and his warmth wrapped around your heart, you believed it.
You really, really did.
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ALL BIRTHDAYS ARE HAPPY, WELL THEY SHOULD BE. But this morning, this birthday of yours, it was not something that just truly felt odd. You had tried to put it off, knowing that it wasn’t the right place or time to talk about it. You could feel it, you know you do. Something was wrong with your best friend. 
Geto Suguru had been unusually quiet all day, even when he was trying to be casual and jolly, smiling at you. But you knew there was something going on and you couldn't put your finger on why. The excitement of the day had dulled a little, as the two of you moved through the motions of cake and presents, but something in the air felt different.
It wasn’t until later that afternoon when everything changed.
You had walked him to the train station, like you always did, ever since he moved to another part of the city. Though this time, there was an unspoken weight that drowned between you, a heaviness that neither of you could shake. Geto Suguru, usually so confident and carefree, seemed distant, his usual smile a little more strained.
"I got in." he said, as the train pulled up to the station, his voice barely above a whisper, yet somehow carrying the weight of his words.
You paused, unsure of what he meant at first. "Got in?"
He nodded, his eyes avoiding yours for a moment before meeting your gaze. "To Jujutsu High School. I’m going to Tokyo."
Your heart skipped, the reality of the situation sinking in like ice water. 
He was going to leave you, you were going to be separated. 
Your Suguru was heading to Tokyo to train, on the other side of your world.
For the first time in years, you wouldn’t be by each other’s side every day. The thought was almost impossible to process. Not when you had been together for so long, just being bubbles in each other’s circle. Your lips parted, you wanted to say something. But you didn’t know what. You were too stunned to speak. 
"Wait, you’re leaving? When?" you whispered, your voice suddenly became small. 
“Tomorrow.” He whispered, his tone almost blossoming with shame. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I don’t….I didn’t want to ruin the time and I didn't think it was going to come any time soon, but it just….”
"But… but today’s my birthday, Sugu."
Suguru gave you a sad smile, his hand reaching out to ruffle your hair. "I know. I’m sorry. But it’s not goodbye forever, okay? We’ll keep in touch, I promise."
You nodded, but the lump in your throat made it hard to speak. Suguru was your rock, your constant. The thought of him being so far away, in a completely different city, felt like the world was shifting beneath your feet.
He took a step closer to you, lowering his voice. "I didn’t want to leave without giving you something special." He pulled out a small box from his pocket, holding it out to you. 
You took it from his warm hands, your eyes brimming with questions. When you opened it, a soft gasp escaped your lips. Inside was a new charm for your bracelet—a delicate purple colored buttercup, its petals etched with such fine detail that it looked almost real. It was beautiful. And soulful. Almost glistening as brightly as his eyes.
He smiled gently, a warmth in his eyes as he slipped the charm onto your bracelet. "It’s a buttercup," he said softly. "My nickname for you. So I thought…I thought it would be perfect."
You stared at the charm for a moment, the lump in your throat thickening. "You still call me that…"
Suguru’s smile grew tender. "Always will. And whenever you look at it, I want you to think of me, okay? Think of me often."
You blinked away the tears threatening to spill and smiled back at him. "I will, Sugu. I promise."
He pulled you into a tight hug, holding you close for just a moment longer than usual. "Take care of yourself, alright? And don’t forget—I’m just a train ride away. Osaka is not that far. So when you need me, call me. Okay?"
“Okay.” You squeezed him back, trying to imprint the moment into your memory, trying to hold onto the feeling of him next to you. "I won’t forget. I’ll think of you every day."
Suguru pulled away slowly, his fingers brushing the side of your face. "I know you will."
The train’s loud engine roared to brutish life, and the sound of the wheels on the tracks made your chest tighten even further. You watched Suguru stand by the window.
His beautiful face illuminated by the soft afternoon light as the train slowly started to pull away. Your feet felt rooted to the ground, your mind racing with so many things you wanted to say, things you didn’t know how to say.
But before you could stop yourself, something inside you snapped. You took a step forward, then another, and then you were running, your heart pounding heavily in your chest, your breath coming faster as you pushed yourself harder, faster, chasing the train like you could somehow outrun the fear that gripped your heart.
"Suguru!" you called out, your voice shaking, but loud enough for him to hear.
He turned around in surprise, his eyes wide as he saw you running toward him. The train was moving faster now, but he didn’t hesitate. You could see how his face lit up with a mix of disbelief and hope, his hand pressed against the window.
"Sugu!" you shouted again, your heart racing even harder, your legs moving as if they had a will of their own. The distance between you seemed so large, but you weren’t going to stop.
He leaned closer to the window, his hand now reaching out, as if trying to touch you through the glass. You could see the concern on his face, his bright lilac eyes filled with an emotion you couldn’t quite name, but it made you move faster, faster than you thought you could.
When you finally reached the side of the train, you stopped just short of losing your breath. You pressed your hands to your chest, feeling your heart pounding, and you looked up at him, eyes shining.
"I love you, Suguru!" you blurted, the words spilling out before you could stop them.
For a moment, there was nothing but silence. Geto Suguru froze, his eyes wide in astonishment, as though he hadn’t expected you to say it—that particular thing, not now, not like this. You watched him, your heart hanging in the air between you, waiting for his reaction, wondering if you had made a mistake.
But then, his expression softened, and a smile broke through the surprise. It wasn’t just a smile you see. It was his smile, that beautiful smile that only belonged to you. The one that made everything feel like it would be okay, no matter what. He nodded slowly, a little chuckle escaping his lips as he leaned closer to the window, as if pulling you in even from a distance.
"I love you too, buttercup!" he said, his voice full of warmth, his eyes soft but certain.
And just like that, everything that had felt so heavy was lifted, the weight of the unspoken tension, the distance between you, all of it faded into the background of that moment. You smiled back at him, breathless but relieved, and the world around you seemed to slow down.
The train started to pick up speed again, and Suguru gave you one last look, his smile still lingering as he waved.
"Take care of yourself, okay?" he called out, his voice carrying over the noise of the train.
"I will!" you said, a smile tugging at your lips. "I’ll always think of you."
And with that, the train pulled away, leaving you standing there, heart full, the buttercup charm on your bracelet gleaming softly in the fading light. 
That train carried your heart with him.
But you were sure that you held his heart here too.
You looked at your buttercup charm, smiling.
“Come back to me soon, okay?”
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THERE WAS SOMETHING ABOUT HOW MUCH HE HAD CHANGED. And all he could do was wish that you didn’t see it, that you would never find out the truth. All he could pray for was that you didn’t notice the light in his eyes dying or the bitterness of the taste from the curses he was forced to consume still on his tongue.  
Geto Suguru has always been a powerful force of nature, a rock withstanding everything in his way. In a way, he was also your rock, your steady presence in your life. No matter what was happening around him, he was there, unwavering, holding everything together with that quiet strength of his. 
But recently, something in him had started to shift. Something he wasn’t prepared to admit to just yet. Ever since Amanai Riko’s death, the change had been subtle at first, there were those small signs that he was struggling, pulling away just a little more each day. But now, as the days passed, it became harder to ignore.
Geto Suguru was slipping.
And he didn’t know how to stop it.
He didn’t know how to be more than this.
He didn’t know the way out of it.
He found himself lost in a fog of thoughts he couldn’t quite articulate, his emotions tangled in a web he couldn't find a way out of. The burden of loss weighed heavily on him, crushing him in ways he didn’t know how to handle. But he couldn’t—wouldn’t—let you see it. Not today. Not on your birthday. Not on your last day together.
He had made it a point, from the moment you walked into the room, to be the Suguru you knew. He plastered on that familiar smile, spoke to you like everything was fine, and made sure the day went on like any other. 
But the moment you looked away, or when you laughed, or when he caught you looking at him with that softness in your eyes, a heaviness settled deep in his chest. He wanted to say something, to tell you what was really happening, but the words felt like they were caught in his throat, unable to escape.
You had no idea what he was battling inside.
And he couldn’t bear to burden you with it—not on your special day.
It was the evening, the sun sinking low in the sky, and you both sat together on the balcony of his apartment, watching the colors in the sky shift from gold to deep blue. The breeze was warm, and you had your head resting on his shoulder, the same way you had for years. You both sat there in a comfortable silence, but Suguru’s mind was anywhere but there.
"I’m really glad we could spend the day together, Sugu." you said softly, your voice like a melody that brought him back to the present. “Thank you for coming to visit me, even with your busy schedule.”
Suguru nodded, his smile barely there as he kept his gaze on the horizon, afraid if he looked at you too long, you would see the cracks he was trying to hide. "Me too, buttercup." he said, but even to his own ears, the words didn’t sound right. They didn’t carry the weight they should have.
You could feel the subtle shift in his energy, the way he wasn’t fully present. He wasn’t the Geto Suguru you knew, the Sugu who would always make you laugh, who would hold you close and whisper silly things to keep your spirits high. He was distant, almost like a shadow of himself. And you knew he hated it, even without saying it to you.
"Sugu." you said quietly, sitting up to look at him, your hand gently touching his arm. "You okay?"
Suguru flinched, the question catching him off guard. He gave a small, forced laugh, trying to brush it off. "Yeah, I’m fine. Just tired, I guess. I’ve….been very busy."
But you didn’t buy it. You knew him better than anyone else, and you could see the lie in his eyes. But he wasn’t ready to talk, not now, not on the day that was meant to be yours, not on the day that he wanted to protect you from his own chaos. He didn’t want you to see him like this, not when everything was supposed to be perfect.
He wanted to be strong for you, wanted to be the Geto Suguru you deserved, the Geto Suguru that you love, the Geto Suguru you knew. But the weight of the world felt like it was crushing him from the inside, and he didn’t know how to hold it together anymore. 
You reached up to touch his cheek, the gesture so simple but full of the warmth you had always shared. "Sugu… you don’t have to hide from me. Not now. Not ever."
He froze at your touch, his lilac eyes shutting softly, even for just a brief second. He wanted to let it all go, wanted to break down in front of you, but he couldn’t. Not like this. Not today. He swallowed hard, the words choking him before he could even say them.
"I’m fine." he repeated, but there was no conviction in his voice. “Really, buttercup. Don’t worry so much about me, okay?”
You didn’t push him further, but the sadness in his once bright eyes told you everything you needed to know. He was breaking inside, but he didn’t want you to see it. He didn’t want you to know. He didn’t want to talk about it just yet. He wasn’t ready. Not yet. And especially not on your last day together.
"Okay." you whispered softly, leaning back against his shoulder once more, both of you falling into silence again.
But Geto Suguru knew. He knew that you would always see through him. And as you sat there, so close, yet so far from what was really happening, he couldn’t help but feel like he was losing grip on everything. He thought he was losing himself, you, on the life you had dreamed of sharing.
And so, the night passed in a quiet sadness, Suguru’s heart heavy with emotions he couldn’t quite express. Tomorrow, he will leave. Tomorrow, everything will change. He knew that all too well. By sunrise, you wouldn’t recognize him anymore. By sunrise, he wouldn’t be your Sugu anymore. 
But for tonight, he would hold onto this—hold onto you, and pretend that everything was okay, just for a little while longer. He thinks he could pretend one last time and keep you with him, enjoying the need of warmth that only you could understand.
The evening air was still, the world outside quieting as the stars began to prick the darkening sky. You sat together for a little while, as you waited for the train to come. Geto Suguru’s silence was heavy, but there was a soft, almost palpable tenderness in the way he was beside you. It was always that way, when he was beside you. Even when you were kids.
But the silence was a new thing. This silence was so loud, and yet so deafening. Yet you also didn’t bridge the gap. At least not tonight. He didn’t need it right now and you can tell. You just took a deep breath and waited, staring off the train tracks. 
Your Suguru seemed lost in his own thoughts, his calloused fingers absentmindedly tracing patterns on the railing in front of you, his lilac gaze ever so lost in the faraway space. To the place you could not follow.
But you knew it was just his way of trying to hold everything in. Then, after a moment that felt like eternity, he broke the quiet, his voice soft but steady, like he was trying to make it sound casual when it wasn’t. 
"I got you something, buttercup." he said, his hand reaching into his pocket. You looked up at him, noticing the faintest tremor in his fingers, but you didn't comment on it.
He pulled out a small, carefully wrapped box, offering it to you with a look that was a mix of hesitation and something deeper, something he couldn’t quite put into words. "I know it’s not much, but I wanted to give you something… meaningful. Like always."
You took the box from him, your little heart fluttering a little in anticipation, not knowing what to expect. Slowly, you unwrapped it with much care, your tender fingers gently peeling back the layers until you saw what was inside.
It was a charm, delicate and beautiful, with a tiny forget-me-not flower carved into its surface. The petals were soft, yet detailed, their edges just slightly raised as if to give them life, to make them feel real. The forget-me-not. It was simple but meaningful, and somehow, it felt like it held everything unsaid between you two in one small, fragile flower.
Suguru’s voice broke the moment, barely above a whisper, but heavy with emotion. "I want you to always remember me, buttercup." he said, his gaze meeting yours, his eyes dark with something you couldn’t place. "No matter what happens, no matter where life takes us, never forget about me."
You froze for a heartbeat, confusion washing over you at his words. Never forget about him?
The thought didn’t make sense. Geto Suguru was more than just a memory; he was the person who had shaped so much of your life, the one who had been there for you through everything. He was your everything. How could you forget him?
You blinked, the knot in your chest tightening as you took in his face, his solemn expression that didn’t match the usual carefree look he wore. Was he already saying goodbye in some way?
You shook your head slowly, the smile coming to your lips, though it carried a mixture of sadness and certainty. "Sugu, how could you even think about that?… I could never forget about you." 
“It can happen, you know. Life happens.” He smiles in a small timid manner.  
Your voice was soft, but there was no doubt in it. "No, you’re wrong. You’re the most important person in my life. How could I forget someone like you?"
Suguru’s lilac eyes softened at your words, the weight of the moment easing just a little as you spoke. His chapped lips parted slightly, as if he wanted to say something more, but he only let out a quiet, relieved breath, his shoulders relaxing for the first time that evening.
He reached out, gently placing the forget-me-not charm on your bracelet, his fingers lingering there for a moment longer than necessary. "I just… I need to know you’ll always remember. Even when we’re apart.”
"I will, I promise." you said, your voice firm, the sincerity in your words reaching the deepest parts of him. "I’ll always think of you. Every single day, every single hour. Even the seconds. I’ll always remember you, Suguru. You’re too important to forget."
“Is that so?”
You hummed, smiling at him. “Hm. Because I love you.”
For a brief, tender moment, Suguru’s eyes seemed to shine with something that wasn’t just sadness but relief. It was as if the weight of the unspoken fears, the guilt, and the pain he’d been carrying had finally started to lift, just a little. He smiled, a real, heartfelt smile that reached his eyes.
"Good," he said quietly, his voice thick with emotion. "That’s all I need to hear."
And there, under the stars, with the sound of the world fading into a quiet lull, you both sat together. You didn’t need words to fill the silence that had settled between you. The charm on your bracelet was a promise, a symbol of everything you had been through, everything you had shared, and everything that was still to come.
"I love you too, buttercup." Suguru whispered, his voice barely above a breath, but the words carried so much weight, so much meaning that it felt like the whole world had shifted in that instant.
You didn’t hesitate, not for a second. "I know, Sugu. I know." you replied, a soft smile tugging at the corners of your lips, a smile that only he could make appear. 
It was a statement, but one that wasn’t born out of arrogance. It was the truth. The truth that had been there all along, between the quiet moments, the shared laughter, the years of growing together. He was your constant, just as you were his.
And you had always known, known in the very marrow of your bones.
he loved you too. More than anything in life. More than the universe could know.
Suguru didn’t immediately respond. He simply stared at you, his gaze softening with an intensity that almost made it hard to breathe. He shifted closer, his hands rising slowly, as if afraid that if he moved too fast, you would vanish in an instant. His fingers brushed against the curve of your jaw before they settled on your cheeks, warm and grounding.
His touch was gentle, the weight of his hands steady against your skin, as though he was afraid to touch you too hard, afraid that any sudden movement would make you slip through his fingers.
His gaze never wavered from your face, and for a long moment, it was like the world faded away. There was nothing but the two of you, him, close enough for you to feel the warmth of his presence, and you, feeling like the universe had shrunk to this moment.
Suguru’s eyes searched for yours, his expression both tender and filled with something deeper, something that only someone who had loved you for so long could understand. It was as though he was memorizing every detail of you.
The way the light caught in your eyes, the curve of your lips, the soft flutter of your lashes when you blinked. He took in your features like he was afraid they would slip away, like time was running out and he couldn’t afford to miss a single second of it.
His thumb traced the outline of your cheekbone, the movement so soft it almost tickled, but it was full of reverence. As if you were something sacred to him, something irreplaceable. As if you were the most important pearl of the world, shining in front of him, making him your sea. 
"You’re so beautiful, buttercup." he whispered, and the words held so much more than just a compliment. It was the way he said them, as if he had seen every side of you—your strengths, your flaws, your heart—and still, in every corner of it, you were beautiful to him. 
The simplicity of the words took your breath away, and for a moment, you didn’t know how to respond. You just looked at him, feeling the weight of his love like a gentle embrace, like it wrapped around your heart, holding it safe in his hands.
You didn’t need to speak to feel the truth of it all. This moment, this space between you, felt like the entire universe had conspired to bring you to this point, where everything you had shared and everything you had yet to share hung in the balance of this silent exchange.
Suguru leaned in slightly, his breath warm against your skin. You could feel the way his body was still, but there was a pulse of something deep inside him, something he wasn’t fully ready to let go of, not yet. And in that breathless, delicate space, you let your own heart speak.
"I love you, Sugu." you whispered back, your voice trembling just slightly, but filled with a certainty that made everything else fade into the background.
His hands cupped your face a little tighter, his thumbs stroking the soft skin of your cheeks as if you were the only thing that mattered in the world. "I’ll never forget you, buttercup." he murmured, almost as if he was saying it to himself, but you heard it. “You’re everything I am. Everything I breathe.”
The weight of it hung in the air, and though his words were bittersweet, you felt a flicker of hope in them.
"I’ll never forget you either." you whispered, your voice steady and sure, despite the turmoil swirling within you.
Because you knew that no matter where life took you both, Suguru would always be a part of you. No amount of time or distance could change that. “You’re my everything too.”
You leaned into his touch, your foreheads pressing gently together, the warmth of his hands grounding you both in the moment. His lilac eyes closed for a beat, a soft sigh escaping him as if he, too, was trying to hold on to this feeling, trying to commit it to memory just as you were.
And for that brief moment, there was no goodbye. There was only the now, the shared stillness, the love between you both, wrapped up in the quiet understanding that no matter what happened, you would always carry each other with you.
He moved his face closer, his lips brushing softly against your forehead. The kiss was light, like a promise, a silent vow that this love, this sacred bond between the two of you, it would never truly be broken, no matter the miles between you.
Suguru’s lips linger on your forehead for a moment longer, a soft, lingering warmth that makes everything else feel distant, as if time had slowed down just for the two of you.
The world outside the station, the sound of the train tracks, the noises of the city, the ticking of the clock, everything seemed muted, fading into the background as you both existed in this fragile, perfect bubble of quiet.
He pulled back slightly, just enough to meet your gaze, his eyes soft but laden with an unspoken weight. He looked like he wanted to say something more, something important, but the words never quite formed. 
Instead, he just studied your face, as if he was trying to memorize everything about you. Every little memory of you, your bright expression, the way your long hair fell around your face, the way your eyes held a kindness that had always been there, even in the most difficult of times.
“I’ll miss you.” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion, a subtle crack breaking through the calm facade he’d been trying so hard to maintain.
You nodded, your heart aching as his words sank in. The truth was, you would miss him too, more than you could ever put into words. You couldn’t even imagine what life would be like without him so close, without his constant presence to steady you.
The thought of the distance between you both made the space around you feel colder, as though the warmth of his touch was already slipping through your fingers.
“I’ll miss you too, Sugu. More than you know.” you whispered back, the truth of it making your voice tremble just slightly.
He smiled, a sad, bittersweet thing, his thumb tracing the outline of your jaw once more, slow and deliberate, like he was savoring every moment.
"Just remember, buttercup." he murmured, his eyes soft but intense. "No matter where we are, no matter how far apart we get, I’ll always be with you. I’ll always be there, in everything we’ve shared."
"I know." you said, nodding again, a small smile tugging at your lips. “And I’ll always carry a piece of you with me. In my heart.”
Geto Suguru’s breath caught at your words, his eyes glistening as if he wanted to say something more, but the emotion was too much, too overwhelming. Instead, he just leaned in and kissed your forehead once more, gentle but full of all the feelings he couldn’t quite express.
“I’ll be waiting, buttercup.” he whispered, his voice low, but there was a fierce determination behind it. “No matter how long it takes. I’ll be waiting for you.”
You looked up at him, your heart full, eyes brimming with something that could have been tears if you let it. You didn’t speak for a moment, just held his gaze, feeling the weight of his words settle into you like a warm, comforting blanket.
Finally, you smiled through the lump in your throat, the quiet sadness blending with something softer, something hopeful. "I’ll come back to you, Sugu. I promise. So come back to me too, okay?"
The words hung between you, a promise sealed in the silence that followed. 
He can’t promise something like that to you, not like this now. 
By sunrise, he can no longer come back to you, never again.
And yet, he still does, he lets this promise be unfulfilled.
He lets this moment be a little white lie to keep your smile.
Suguru nodded, a small, hopeful smile on his lips, but his eyes, those dark, familiar eyes, held a quiet ache. He didn’t say anything else, just stayed close, his hand still on your cheek, his presence steady even though the moment was winding down. The night was still, and it felt like time was slipping away too fast.
“I should go, buttercup.” Suguru said, his voice tinged with reluctance. "But I’ll see you again, right? You’ll visit me when you can, won’t you?"
You nodded, already knowing how much this meant to him. You smiled tenderly at him, you smiled at him like you loved him. You smiled at him like he deserves to have it. And yet he doesn’t. The devil does not deserve such a thing.
"Of course I will." you reassured him, reaching up to touch his hand, the one that had stayed on your cheek. "I won’t let you forget about me."
His smile grew just a little, and for the first time in what felt like forever, there was a glimmer of peace in his eyes. "I could never forget about you."
And with that, he gave you one last kiss on the forehead, light and full of everything unsaid, full of everything you would carry with you in your heart. He pulled back slowly, his hand slipping from your cheek to your hand.
His fingers lingering for a moment longer, as though reluctant to let go. Then, with a final, lingering look, he turned and made his way toward the door. He didn't want to leave. He didn't want this to be the last time. But he had to. He had to go.
He let himself step into it, the door closing softly behind him. For a moment, you felt the weight of the world shift. The quiet that followed his departure felt louder than any noise, and yet, somehow, you knew you’d be okay. You’d carry him with you, just like you promised.
The night grew darker, but the small forget-me-not charm on your bracelet caught the light, reminding you of everything you had shared. It was more than just a memory, it was a piece of him that you could hold on to, no matter where life took you both.
Geto Suguru was always going to be a part of you. And no matter the distance, no matter how much time passed, you would never forget him. He was the most important part of your life, and that would never change.
Two days later, you got the call.
He had gone missing, his parents were gone.
And you?
You had lost the love of your life.
That was his goodbye.
══════════════════
epilogue
A LONG TIME HAD COME AND GONE, BUT IT STILL FEELS LIKE YESTERDAY. Seven years had passed since Geto Suguru’s defection from the jujutsu society, since the time he turned away from everything he once held dear. Time had blurred the edges of the past for everyone except him. 
He had tried to move on, he knew he had to. He had all but tried to bury his memories deep enough so that they no longer haunted him. But there were days when everything came rushing back to him.
The horror on his parents faces that night, their deaths at his own hands, the ones he had betrayed, the village consumed by blue flame. And then there was you, the love he had lost and left. The one he had let go and fly away.
From the shadows, Suguru watched you kneel before the graves, the sun hanging low in the sky, casting long shadows across the quiet cemetery. You were gentle with the flowers, your movements soft as you arranged the bouquets on the gravestones, your fingers careful as they brushed away the dust that had accumulated over time. 
He had never imagined, in his darkest moments, that he would see you here—so close, yet so far away from everything he had become. But there you were, tending to the graves of the parents he had killed, as if it was something he had never been able to do. You were doing it for him, in a way, even though you didn’t have to.
He had heard the stories about it all. He had to keep his tabs on you, he just couldn’t stay away, even now. Throughout the years, he heard whispers of how you had married, how you had continued on without him, a life of your own.
He had known that it was bound to happen, but it didn’t make it any easier. To see you with a ring on your finger, a life that no longer had a place for him, a life that had moved on while he stayed stuck in his past.
The soft rustle of the wind moved through the trees, and that was when you turned your head, your eyes meeting his. For a moment, the world seemed to stand still. You blinked, as if you weren’t quite sure you were seeing him, but then there was no mistaking it.
Geto Suguru was standing there, just outside the cemetery gate, watching you with that same quiet intensity that had always been his. The world seemed to hold its breath as you slowly rose to your feet, the weight of his gaze pulling you in.
He didn’t speak at first, not knowing what to say. 
After all this time, what was there left to say?
He had left you and you had suffered.
What could someone who broke their promise say?
You walked toward him, your expression unreadable but steady, your steps purposeful. As you got closer, he noticed the glint of sunlight on your finger, and his breath hitched before he could stop himself. The wedding ring.
It was a beautiful thing, one could say. But when he looked at it, it was all but a bitter ugly, disgusting thing. It was a reminder of the life you had. A life he had never been a part of, a life he had given up on when he made the choices he did. 
You stopped in front of him, your gaze unwavering. You looked at him for a long moment, your eyes searching his face, almost as if you were still trying to figure him out after all this time. "I didn’t think you’d come back here." you said quietly, your voice thick with something he couldn’t place. Maybe it was sorrow. Maybe it was a relief.
Suguru felt a pang in his chest, but he swallowed it down. "I didn’t think I would either." His voice was rough, almost foreign to him after so many years of silence, but the words still carried weight. "But... here I am."
Your gaze flickered to the bracelet on your wrist—the one with the forget-me-not, the buttercup, the book charm. It was a silent progression that told a story. A long forgotten story, one that only you and him could remember. It was at one point his story. His presence, his absence, his love. And now it wasn’t. Not anymore.
That Geto Suguru is dead.
All that remains is an imposter.
All that remains is a devil.
"I never took it off." you said, a small, sad smile playing at the corner of your lips. "You told me to never forget you. I thought I would, after all these years... but I never could." 
Your fingers traced the charms lightly, the memory of the years that had passed between you both lingering in the air like a ghost. "I couldn’t take it off, Suguru. Not even when it felt like I should."
He couldn’t quite hide the sadness that flickered in his eyes at your words, but he didn’t look away. He had been the one to leave. He had been the one to make all the wrong decisions, and yet, somehow, you had never given up on him. You had never completely forgotten him.
Suguru reached into his pocket slowly, his movements deliberate, as though he were unsure of his next step. He pulled out a small charm, delicate and beautiful, white chrysanthemums this time, it was an offering of something new, something that said goodbye and hello being said like it was the same word.  He held it out to you, his eyes never leaving yours. 
"For you." he whispered, his voice barely audible, but full of all the unspoken feelings that had built up over the years. "I know it’s too late. But I want you to have it."
You took it from him, your fingers brushing against his for just a heartbeat before you looked down at the charm in your palm. The white chrysanthemums were soft, intricate, and they reminded you of the fleeting nature of everything. It was full of the memories, the love, the pain.
You smiled, a bittersweet curve of your lips, your heart heavy with a mixture of emotions that you had long buried. "Sugu….Suguru." you began, your voice steady but thick with something he could almost taste. "For so long, TYou wanted to be remembered. But now... you want to be forgotten."
His heart clenched at your words, but he nodded slowly, as if he had already known, as if it was something he could never change. "You deserve better than to remember a ghost of someone long gone, buttercup." he said, his voice soft but full of the kind of finality that only a ghost could understand. "You deserve a life that’s yours, not one haunted by me."
The distance between you seemed so vast in that moment, even though you were standing right in front of him. The years had stretched that gap wide, and yet, in this final moment, you both understood each other completely. 
You stood there, the weight of his words heavy between you both, as the space around you seemed to quiet. The cool breeze rustled the trees, the only sound in the air, but even it felt like a distant whisper against the rawness of the moment.
You opened your mouth, a million things on the tip of your tongue, but none of them felt right. Your heart was full of so much you couldn’t put into words. A thousand emotions flooded your chest/
And yet, you felt an aching kind of clarity in his request. You hadn’t expected it. You hadn’t expected him to say those words, to say that he wanted you to forget him. To leave him behind as if he were nothing more than a faded memory.
He stood before you, his back slightly turned, but he didn’t move away. His eyes, those dark, familiar eyes, were locked onto the distance, as though he was already gone in his mind, already on his way to somewhere far from this place, from you.
You swallowed hard, your gaze flickering over his face, trying to catch any hint of a smile, of the warmth that had once been there between you both. But it was gone. Everything had long perished to nothing.
The man in front of you wasn’t the same person you had known all those years ago, and deep down, you knew that neither were you. You had both changed, time had done its work, and the world had swept you in different directions.
"So, if I see you again—" you started, unsure of where to take the conversation, unsure of whether there even was a conversation left to have.
Suguru’s smile was sad, almost imperceptible, but it was there, and it tugged at your heart more than anything else. “Pass by, buttercup.” he said, his voice so soft, so worn. "Don’t look at me. You shouldn’t remember me. Just...."
Let me go. He thinks to himself. Don't love me again.
The simplicity of his request hit you harder than any words of anger or resentment could have. You shouldn’t remember me. He was asking you, begging you, to forget him. As though he was a shadow, a passing thing, unworthy of your attention, of your love, of your memories.
For a moment, you just stood there, your heart pounding in your chest, your mind spinning with the weight of it all. You wanted to shout, to argue, to tell him that he was wrong—that you couldn’t just erase him from your life like he was nothing.
But the silence in the air, the finality in his tone, made you hesitate. It wasn’t anger you heard in his voice. It wasn’t even regret. It was something else entirely. it was something deeper, something rooted in the pain he had carried all these years.
“I can’t just forget you.” you whispered, the words slipping out before you could stop them. The truth was raw and simple, and it echoed in your chest as it passed through your lips. "I’ve carried you with me for so long, Suguru. I can’t just erase you from my life."
Suguru turned his head slightly, just enough to meet your gaze, his eyes dark and filled with something you couldn’t quite place. It wasn’t guilt or anger, but something quieter, something softer, as though he was bracing himself for the weight of what he had just asked you to do.
"You don’t need to carry me anymore." he said, his voice barely audible, each word dragging with the weight of a thousand regrets. "I don’t deserve to be remembered. Not by you. Not by anyone. I’ve become someone else, someone I never meant to be." 
His eyes drifted to the ground, and for a moment, he looked almost... defeated. "I hurt too many people, and in the end, I hurt you too."
Those words hung in the air like a star waiting to fall from the sky but they didn’t sting, nor did they cause you any pain. Instead, they felt like the closing of a door, the end of a chapter that had been written in too much pain. You felt your heart ache, but you understood. You had mourned it long ago and this was just the end. The final bow.
You understood because, deep down, you had always known this moment would come. You had always known that one day, Geto Suguru would fade from your life, not because of time or distance, but because he had made himself into something unrecognizable.
You stepped closer, closer than you had been in so many years, the distance between you two now defined not by physical space but by something more profound, something that time had created. Your hand reached out but you stopped. You had to. You knew you can't do this. You purse your lips into a flat line. 
“I see.” You whispered, barely audible over the deafening silence between you. It was as if the world had swallowed your words before they could reach him, and the weight of it all pressed down on your chest like a heavy fog.
"I'm sorry." you murmured, feeling the familiar sting of regret in your heart. 
But the words felt useless now, just as they always had when it came to him. Too many apologies, too many unanswered questions. It was all too late. Geto Suguru shook his head ever so slightly, his dark lilac eyes never leaving the distance beyond you, his voice low but firm. 
“Don’t apologize to me.” he murmured, the edges of his words soft but carrying a weight that made your heart ache. "I should apologize…"
His eyes finally met yours, and for that brief moment, you saw a flicker of vulnerability, something raw and unguarded that he had never allowed anyone to see.
“Buttercup, I’m letting your hand go.” he said, and his voice cracked on the last word, like it pained him to even say it.
You could feel the tears pricking at your eyes, threatening to spill, but you fought them back, the lump in your throat making it harder to breathe. It was too much. Too much to lose, too much to let go of. 
“I know.” you replied, your voice barely a whisper as if saying it out loud would make it all more real. The finality of his words clung to the air, and you wished you could take them back, take him back, but the truth had already been laid bare.
“Goodbye, buttercup.” he said, the words both tender and final, and they fell like a stone into the abyss between you.
“Good… good-bye, Suguru.” you managed to choke out, your voice shaking but steady enough to carry the weight of the moment. Your lips trembled, but you didn’t dare look away from him. There was nothing more to say, nothing more that could fix the pieces that had been shattered between you two.
Geto Suguru gave you one last look. It was so brief, so fleeting, like the last ray of light before the darkness settled in. His gaze lingered on you, a final connection between two souls that had once shared everything but now, they were a thousand miles apart. 
He didn’t say anything else. 
He didn’t look back, not once. 
He simply turned, his figure growing smaller and smaller as he walked away.
Your heart tightened, but you didn’t move. You couldn’t. There was no running after him anymore. He had already made his choice, and you had to respect that, even though it felt like a piece of you was being torn away with every step he took. 
His footsteps were quiet against the earth, a soft rhythm that carried him further into the distance, further away from you, from everything you had ever known. And you stood there, frozen, unable to move, unable to make sense of the emptiness that filled the space where his presence used to be. 
You watched him disappear into the horizon, the last connection between you both unraveling like a thread slipping through your fingers. But this time, you didn’t chase after him. You didn’t need to. You didn’t have the strength anymore. 
There were no more promises, no more hopes of reunion. This was the end of the story that had once been yours, the final chapter in a love that had burned so brightly but had faded into the past. The world had changed, and so had you.
You would never see him again. He would never hold your hand again, never smile that gentle smile that had always made you feel like you were home. And you could feel the weight of that truth pressing down on you, but it didn’t break you.
It was the end of that world. Of the two of you, of the way you had been, of everything that once felt like it was meant to be. And so, you let go. You let go, even as it hurt, even as it felt like the most impossible thing in the world.
You couldn’t love him anymore. Not like you used to. Not in the way that kept him a part of your every thought, every moment. You couldn’t carry that burden with you forever, and you couldn’t make him stay.
As he disappeared completely from sight, you finally exhaled the breath you’d been holding, a quiet sigh that seemed to carry away the remnants of him still lingering in your chest. It wasn’t easy. It would never be easy. But it was the only way forward.
You took a slow step back, your feet heavy with the weight of all the years you had spent loving him. You weren’t sure what the future held, but you knew one thing for certain. You had to let him, or you'll both suffer more.
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freddleafton12345-blog · 3 days ago
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ShadowMilk cookie x lonely! Desperate female reader, who's a Kitsune!))
WARNING! MENTION OF SELF HARM!
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You've had enough.
Time to start cutting away at your arms again with a small knife.
Seeing so many people having a lover made you jealous. You wanted that sort of affection. To be held. Cuddled. Kissed. Wanted.
But nobody seemed interested in you.
Was it because you were too skinny/fat? Was it because you didn't wear enough makeup?
"Well, this is an interesting bunch of thoughts~!"
The sudden voice in your head made you stop yourself from getting ready to add another cut into your dough.
"Who's there!? Show yourself!" You looked around the bathroom, your ears flicking everywhere to pick up any plssible source of the voice.
"Relax, my dear! I'm a friend!" The voice chimed. "Looking for a conversation! You see, your upset, yes?"
"Wha-"
"Tired of being single? Seeing couples makes you think your too useless, right? Everybody's neglecting you! But I...I like you."
"You're saying nonsense! I don't even know you!"
The owner of the voice smirked to himself. He knew that manipulating you into being his forever was all too simple.
You were meant to be his.
"Yes you do~! We've interacted in your dreams many times!"
You paused.
There was a cookie that had been seeing you in your dreams a lot. He looked like a Jester that was decorated in black and blue, with a dash of white. And he had gorgeous mismatched eyes.
Was that the owner of the voice in your head?
"I can read your thoughts, and yes! I'm the guy from your dreams! ShadowMilk cookie!"
"ShadowMilk cookie? Wait you- YOU'RE THE BEAST THAT TRIED TORMENTING PURE VANILLA COOKIE!" You panicked, gripping your tail to calm down.
"Pssht, relax darling! I don't wanna hurt ya! I wanna help you! You seem like you want to have a lover. A companion. I can do that for you, if you become my...helper, hehe!"
'Helper?'
Becoming the assistant of the most powerful Beast cookie, in exchange for affection?
You wanted to say no. To warn Pure Vanilla that ShadowMilk was watching you.
But...finally being loved and cared for was all too tempting.
And the Beast smirked as he knew...
You were already under his control...
~~~
ShadowMilk cookie had given you a glowing blue trail of energy only you could see. So you could find his domain.
And it was fun but twisted.
You admired some of the carnival games, and even attended a theater show. You indulged in your curiosity and fun.
Then you headed into the castle.
"Oho, I see I've got my favorite person is infront of me? FINALLY!" The Jester exclaimed, flying off his chair to inspect you.
Your ears pinned back, he didn't look scary, but you knew better than to let your guard down.
"H-hi there, ShadowMilk cookie.." you muttered shyly.
"Now now, no need to be shy! If I'm going to be your boyfriend, then I wanna see your cute face!" He tilted your head upwards slightly with his hand, smirking.
Would he ever let you go?
No...
~~~
It's been about 6 months since you got to meet the Beast cookie and stay at his twisted castle.
And you asked yourself why you didn't do it sooner.
Was him pampering you and telling you he loved you everyday a lie? Probably. But did it feel nice being treated like that?
Yes, because you were so damn desperate.
As you played around with the giant black and blue snake, his pet, he simply watched you from afar.
...did he like you?
The Beast really didn't know. He got jealous and angry anytime you spoke about PureVanilla. Saying he should've noticed how badly you were hurting on the inside, and that the fact he didn't, made him a poor excuse of a true friend.
But he also didn't know if he wanted to give you his heart.
So, he continued to simply treat you like his partner, when he didn't consider himself as such a thing.
"Hi ShadowMilk cookie!" You went over to him, the snake following you. "I fed Noodle, just as you asked!"
"Ah, very well done then! Noodle doesn't like anybody who's not me! Count yourself a very lucky, lucky cookie!" The Beast pet his snake, then sent it elsewhere.
Then, he looked...serious?
"..." ShadowMilk removed his Jester crown and looked away. Like he was..scared?
"Now then, um...you see, I had a script. Bring you here, feed you sweet, little lies, and make sure you would go against PureVanilla cookie. Help me get his soul jam. However, you ruined that script!"
"W-what-? No, no, I don't know what you mean!" You felt scared. Was he gonna kill you?
"...you made me feel warm and fuzzy when you're around. You haunted my mind and it was so...so ANNOYING! And you made me want more of it.."
No way.
No fucking way he was confessing!?
"..." the Beast cookie said nothing as he took your hand in his, his gaze on the floor.
"...I like you too, ShadowMilk cookie. I didn't think I'd be able to learn to love you, but...I can't help it." You admitted, your ears pinned and tail wagging.
"Oh, is that so~?" He put his crown back on and pulled you in close, summoning an apple.
"Then...why don't you and I become one, heart and soul, hm?" He held it up towards you.
You leaned in and took a bite of the apple, and he did the same thing while maintaining his eyes on yours, like a hungry predator.
Even when the apple slipped and hit the floor, his gaze didn't leave yours. It only closed once he shut his eyes as you kissed him deeply. And he wasted zero time in reciprocating.
And in that moment you knew he was actually being honest for once.
And it made you happy, knowing you were worth his complete honesty~
Guys this fic is one of my longest, sorry if it's bad. Also, idk if that's his pet or not, but I hc this is his pet snake, Noodle! (He would name it smth silly lmao) (also that wasn't an apple of deceit, just a normal apple idk it was hot 2 think about :3)
"PLEASE, REBLOG AND SHARE THIS, FOLKS! AND I'LL SEE YOU NEXT TIME, MWEHEHE~!!"
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pruneunfair · 1 day ago
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Roasting OI leads, Part 1: Remarried empress.
Heinrey, if you don't get your "woe is me." Ass outta here-
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Fuck outta here with your "UwU, I wuv my wife." bullshit, your a grown ass man, he LITERALLY turns into her pet bird. He really thinks he's cute when he does it, thinks it's cute to have the reputation of a womanizer for no concrete reason but hey! It was actually ERGI pretending to be Heinrey so it's TOTALLY fine. Yeah, I bet those women who had no clue they were essentially being assaulted via deception were REALLY happy about the fact you weren't a real womanizer.
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Mother fucker you are the emperor of a landlocked country and your goofy ass is making everyone your enemy when you don't even have direct access to an OCEAN.
Your actions are the damn REASON your wife is being hunted down, your dumbass made enemies with another important noble house, you could've ended when you imprisoned Krista (I really do believe he straight up killed her and made it look like a suicide) but no, you had to make the grand Duke essentially let his daughter get hanged because otherwise you would have went after the GRANDKIDS!
And that's not even mentioning he fed the old Duke the remains of his son!
Serves him his own son and has the audacity to act all sad and depressed when he is told that not even hell wants his wacky ass.
If it isn't being known as a tyrant, it will be you being known as a fucking idiot who ruled based on your wifes happiness as seld justification to help you sleep at night.
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Yeah I'm sure the wife that was killed and the children's that got sold to slavery had a lot to do with one guy trying assassinate Navier.
This bro really acting like he such a misunderstood man who just wanted to protect his pregnant wife, while selling CHILDREN into slavery. If those kids grow up and end up as Rashtas, I better not see Navier or Heinrey complaining when they come back for revenge.
By the way? You straight up organized this with your weird ass "I like em 16 and magical" friend Ergi.
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Just know that Heinrey was willing to help lead a young mother to insanity so Navier wouldn't have to face criticism. Did the writers not realize they were calling themselves out or was this left by the manhea translators who agreed that Heinrey is full of shit.
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This you?
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"I don't want to lie to you." And then he proceeds to hide the fact that he was stealing magic for over 100 chapters and would've kept the act up if she didn't find out for herself. "I no wanna go to war cause wuv you mah queen cute 😢" and Just like Sovieshu defending Rashta when she acts cute for him, Navier doesn't seem to really care.
Speaking of Navier.
Don't think you're safe girl!
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Navier, honey, sweetie, I usually give you the benefit of the doubt since you are far from the most evil person here, but you don't get call yourself a fair Empress while condoning your husbands shit just because he's open about it.
Hell.. I don't think her description can even say she's kind to all her subjects when A: Out of all the mages who got their magic back, Evalie is the only one since she's clearly the favorite out of all the poor kids and B: She clearly doesn't give a fuck about slavery. Like this isn't just a case where she dislikes it but can't change the law, no. She outright doesn't give a shit and sees slavery as a mere afterthought.
Peep her reactions when she learns Rashta is a slave.
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She. Doesn't. Care
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I know you didn't think we wouldn't notice you making friends with a slave owner out of spite for the slave that got on your nerves. (Well actually almost no one noticed)
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Navier, You have every right to be pissed that your husband is humiliating and verbally abusing you.
But even if you supported the confederacy with all your heart, you should still know that Rashta, as a slave, CAN'T SAY NO to the EMPEROR. Hell even if she were a commoner she couldn't say no.
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This the same woman acting like it was unfair that Landre almost got executed with no trial BTW. Lande, who stabbed Rashta while she was pregnant because she spread some rumors about Duchess Leonardo Dicaprio. Sure he didn't know she was pregnant but he still attempted to kill someone, he brought that knife with him, that was premeditated.
but I guess trials for someone to be proven innocent or guilty sure don't matter when it comes to the people affiliated with your enemies.
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asexualbookbird · 2 days ago
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It sure has been a Year huh. Ups and downs this month, as life happens. Saw friends I haven't seen in years, went into the city and met new friends, tried new foods, saw some birds, tried new crafts, read new books.
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The Fireborne Blade by Charlotte Bond ⭐️⭐️⭐️ - Hm! Interesting! Didn't hate it, but something feels missing? Almost like it could've benefited from being at the very least a short novel. It needed more. I also have qualms at this being pitched as sapphic when there is no romance at all and the main character talks a lot about being betrayed by her last romance with a man. One mention of Woman With Hot Thighs. Not mad I read it, might even read it again.
That Time I Got Drunk and Saved a Demon by Kimberly Lemming ⭐️⭐️ ‐ I'll be honest, one star is Mean but I had a lot more fun reading Fourth Wing and that was two stars. The tone is what dragged this one down for me. It reads like YA, but it's very much not. I do not believe for a second the MC is 24, she doesn't act like it at all. The sex scenes. Are there. I could make an entire post about the book ending on them having penetrative PiV sex. Part of my grievances are me not liking the genre, but I truly think this just isn't that good. Plenty of people on the internet write better more filthy works for free. Why was this sitting unassumingly on the library shelf.
*amended to two stars if this is indeed satire
The Dead Cat Tail Assassins by P Djèlí Clark ⭐️⭐️⭐️ - Fine. Not much to say because it was Completely Average. Not mad I read it, but don't wish to repeat the experience. I think maybe Clark isn't an author for me, as I recall feeling similarly about A Master of Djinn. It's not so much that the characters or world feel flat, but something definitely feels missing. It was silly and lighthearted and gory and I did like that though!
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The Spellshop by Sarah Beth Durst ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ - Another hit from Sarah Beth Durst. I see your Themes. I see your Tropes. Kindness. Found family. Accepting help. All personal attacks on me. Adorable, fun, some sort of cross between T Kingfisher and Becky Chambers, I didn't want it to end, and now have a name for my spider plant. It also seems like I need to get my spider plant a friend.
The Woods All Black by Lee Mandelo ⭐️⭐️ - I have very mixed feelings about this that are really summarized as This Wasn't For Me. I like the idea that yeah you're a monster but someone loves you anyway. I like using the monster to punish those who called you one. I think there's some very specific midwestern religious trauma that I'm missing to really Get It, though. On top of that, while I recognize the themes and significance in the age gap, a 30 year old going after an 18 year old icks me out. I'd still recommend it with very very heavy reservations.
The Spare Man by Mary Robinette Kowal ⭐⭐ - Going to be honest, I just finished this and I'm already moving on. The writing was fine and I'm not put off of the author entirely, but I never felt wowed. I was annoyed more than anything. I didn't love any of the characters, but I didn't really hate anyone either. The amount of people Tesla let pet her service dog drove me nuts. The ending felt slapped together. It never really felt cohesive. I feel vindicated reading that fans of her other books also were unimpressed with this. I wouldn't steer people away from it, but I didn't have a lot of fun.
I'm tentatively excited for February. I have art ideas I'd like to get started on, I am working on a craft thing that I might be able to profit a bit off of, I'm flat out ignoring the world, book club is approaching. I'm looking for good things in the world, and I will find them. That is a threat.
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raina16 · 3 days ago
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Yeah it's old but it gave me thoughts.
No it isn't. Because his intent was to steal the ships, not to kinslay. That was presented as a situation that got out of hand, not premeditated. I don't think the burning thing works that way. He threatens but doesn't actually hurt someone who was after all actually doing what Feanor said, trying to usurp him(we know this didn't cause him to get burnt because he had the Silmarils for 5 years after). He gets in a situation that gets out of hand and inadvertently leads to many deaths. He leaves behind a bunch of people who have been complaining about him non stop for two years because they refuse to take responsibility for their choices, with their preferred choice for king in a land that's safer than where he's going to, with the full belief they'll turn back, and who would mostly be free to go back and get probably a slap in the wrist from the Valar at worst and who choose of their own free will to cross the ice they'd already decided was too dangerous (and guess what it was and lots of people died but that's on them not Feanor). And he burns the ships. That's probably actually the worst thing he purposely chooses to do. Frankly I don't think anything Feanor does would meet the requirements of getting burned by his own Silmarils (plus I have doubts as to whether his own creations would hurt him, the Valar can hallow them all they want but THEY didn't create them and they cannot create them or unmake them,only he can).
In fact aside from deciding to to give the order to steal the ships, Feanor I don't believe is mentioned again in regards to it. Hell for all we know he didn't kill anyone personally in that battle, he might have just knocked people out(unlikely obviously but just saying, after giving the order to steal, he's not personally implicated again). Heck iirc Fingon is more personally implicated in the actual slaying of kin than Feanor or his sons at Alqualonde.
As for the Teleri, they refused to give the ships, lend the ships or even teach them to build their own ships. The Teleri wouldn't even ferry them themselves. That's extreme and kind of selfish if you ask me considering all the Noldor and specifically murdered Finwe had done for them. Gift giving is a symbol of friendship yes, but that means there is some reciprocity otherwise it's not friendship, if one side does most of the giving, you're being used, friend. It's not about the houses they built for them or the jewels they gave them in abundance, but those were symbols of friendship and friends do stuff for each other. Feanor expected at least some help getting across the sea in vessels actually made for the purpose of sailing the sea and they cared more about the Valar's opinion than about the murder of the guy largely responsible for most of the Teleri people being there.
None of which means they deserved it but again the plan wasn't "murder the Teleri" it was "steal the ships". Kind of funny everyone telling him it's a-okay for someone to steal from you(and murder your most beloved father), you shouldn't do anything about it, immediately start drowning people when they are the ones being stolen from.
As for the Silmarils Feanor started keeping them hidden mostly because he believed (not without reason) that the Valar wanted them(they did) and that Melkor was after them(he was). Is it really paranoia if it's true?
In his speech he speaks of them as essentially being central to creation of a new Noldor kingdom in Middle Earth. That suggests to me that they would not in fact be hidden away. It seems to me that Feanor sees them as the way to free his people from what he feels is their stolen birthright, a life in Middle Earth, to be kept essentially as what he feels are pets in Valinor.
It sounds like it would basically be like what we know as but Feanor didn't at the time, Doriath but by the Noldor and without being dependent on any Ainur for safety. And if it's Ok for Doriath to exist why would it be wrong for the Noldor to have their own special protected kingdom? Why is it OK for Thingol and later for Finrod and for Turgon but somehow it would be wrong for Feanor to have a kingdom of light for his people? Why was it ok for the Valar to decide only their special friends could have light but somehow it's wrong for Feanor?
Hmmm...You know...it's kind of protestant maybe that's why Catholic Tolkien was against it. One of the early ideas of many protestant branches was having a direct relationship with God - no need for saints or virgins to intercede(or priests to grant you "absolution"). Feanor twice puts forth the idea of a direct relationship to Eru without the intercession or need for the saints/Ainur.
And Varda hallowed the Silmarils, so that thereafter no mortal flesh, nor hands unclean, nor anything of evil will might touch them, but it was scorched and withered… 
-Of The Silmarils And The Unrest of the Noldor
I’ve seen people wonder if the Silmarils would have burned Fëanor had he regained them after Alqualondë. Out of curiosity, what is the line of thinking behind the argument that they wouldn’t? He committed felony murder before he left Aman. Even if he personally didn’t physically get blood on his sword, it was at his behest, in a situation of his making. He may not qualify as evil, but his hands are definitely unclean.
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fridgrave2-0 · 5 months ago
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hehe ghost-turbo haunting felix au
turbo is connected to the last piece of his code in the whole arcade - a trophy he gifted to felix in mid 80s as a symbol of him genuinely caring about their relationships on par with being the best racer. felix also gave him one of his medals and both kept their gifts next to other rewards, but when roadblasters and turbotime were unplugged, the medal was gone with everything else
now, after burning in cola-lava turbo is basically dead, but scraps of his code still were intertwined with the trophy (after all, it was his first winner's cup, but felix never knew about it), giving turbo an opportunity to exist as a shadow incapable of interacting with anything and anyone besides felix, who kept the trophy even after the roadblasters incident
also I went crazy in tags, feel free to check them out
#turbo#turbotastic#fix it felix jr#80s boyfriends#hammertastic#headcanon about them exchanging their trophies isn't mine but i loved it A LOT#and “darling” is turbo making fun of how felix was calling him in 80s#this hc about “doll” and “darling” pet names also is not mine but i adore it#turbo here is a complete freak who just stays around felix most of the time even when felix has moments with calhoun#and felix is an ass who keeps secrets from everyone bc he doesn't want his dirt to come out#he's ashamed of his previous relationship with turbo and doesn't want anyone to know any details#and calhoun to just know about it#this just gets worse and worse#they also didn't actually break up and were still technically dating when turbo went gamejumping#and he's mad af at felix because he's the reason ppl in the acrade made a boogeyman out of turbo and he couldn't come back#like imagine your bf says to you what you are better than others think of you#and then behind your (presumably dead) back tells everyone that you're just an egocentric maniac#i believe turbo has other reasons why he gamejumped (besides jealousy which took place but wasn't the most important reason)#and felix is an unreliable narrator#so yeah turbo HATES his ass#(but still would-) no im not making it suggestive#anyway i hc that turbo had put A LOT of emotions in this relationship even tho he's bad at this#he tried his best with felix but they were just making each other worse#and turbo while feeling betrayed never really moved on (yes even after 25 years he's PATHETIC)#and felix is just full of regret about everything but he won't admit his mistakes in his relationship with turbo#bc “well he turned out to be a bad person so that automatically makes me in the right about everything”#but felix had made a lot of bad decisions while dating turbo and was just classically ignorant about a ton of things#sorry about this random ass essay in tags i'm done for now#wreck it ralph#wir
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otaku553 · 1 year ago
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Kind of enjoyed his character teaser! :)
I think Lyney will be pretty interesting especially if he’s the main character introducing us to Fontaine (similarly to like collei and tighnari being the first characters for sumeru). The relationship between magic and law to the truth are very counter to each other, because magic presents falsehood as the truth while law is meant to uncover the truth and judge impartially based on it. I think the fact that we’re seeing a family of magicians in our first banner instead of a judge or a lawyer means a lot of fun things are in store for the Fontaine justice system in terms of how it handles falsehoods presented to it and how it judges what it perceives to be truth.
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r3d-ca9 · 3 hours ago
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OHG HI HI HELLO HELLO
1. Because of Bloodwing and Talon, I usually associate him with vultures!! Something like a bearded vulture, usually. Or other birds of prey.
2. I'd make him a necklace or draw him something!! He's not used to receiving gifts, and isn't too picky, so he'd like pretty much anything I got for him. But a handmade item would mean a LOT more to him, for sure.
3. Exploring Pandora, poking around for secrets and loot. Although if we don't have the energy for that, nothing beats catching up on some drama shows. 😫
4. Y'know.....we uh. Don't really have a house. WHOOPS. I'm gonna say...he'd love any chores involving taking care of the birds, of course. S tier chore. And...just like me, he'd probably HATE dishes. Because dishes suck ass.
5. Oh hell yeah. Dude's basically a stunt driver. If you can successfully survive driving on Pandora for any period of time, you get an A+ from me.
6. Fuckin...hawk screech. You know, the one people always use for eagle noises, even though it's not an eagle sound LMAO.
7. He hates being online. It's stressful. It's dumb. He hates the shit other people post. BUT....maybe, yeah.
8. Mmmmmmm....I wanna say...no...I mean, maybe at some point he did? But he's too cynical for that sort of thing now. Besides...it's more satisfying to view relationships as this thing you work really hard for, rather than some magic that happens out of your control. Soulmates may not be real. But it doesn't mean love is any less powerful.
9. Super casual like, the same way I do everything LMAO. "Hey guys. This is my boyfriend. And these are his birds. Ain't that fuckin' sick? Hell yeah."
10. 👀 cough cough
11. They both seem cool and intimidating, are actually enormous nerds. 👉😎👉
12. It's a toss up between red and green!
13. Also pretty casually! Although. A bit more shy about it. They'd probably know already, or have suspicions, and then be like "I FUCKING KNEW IT"
14. Okay, see...he'd. He'd wanna say something that he thinks is cute. Which isn't a lot of things, maybe a baby bird or some shit. But the OBVIOUS answer is a skag, because I'm very dog.
15. Chocolate. Anyone who knows me at all knows that chocolate is the way to my heart. (Also jerky.)
16. We don't really do pet names? At least, I...haven't really thought of any decent ones. Probably a simple "babe", I guess?? (SORRY MORDY, THE CUTE AND CRINGE PET NAMES ARE RESERVED FOR MY IRL HUSBAND 😤😤😤)
17. 👀👀 COUGH COUGH ............ nah i'm messin', he really loves just chilling!!! Life on Pandora is chaotic, messy, and stressful...any chance to just sit and do something low-key is always appreciated.
18. Acts of service, for sure! Helping me solve problems, getting stuff for me, comforting me, he just likes checking on me and making sure I'm doing well!!
19. My winning personality 🫡
20. GRAH, I don't know. I guess he likes how resilient I can be, and how even in the face of stress and danger, I still try to crack jokes and break the tension for the benefit of those around me. He has a hard time seeing the brighter side of life sometimes, and so do I, but I'll be DAMNED if I'm just gonna sit by and let despair swallow me up.
21. Oh my HEART. I don't think he's much of an artist, but I will fold it up and keep it in my wallet forever, no matter what it looks like. <3
22. Mordy doesn't really like eating, so no. He only eats what he has to, so I would never try to snatch any snacks from him, tbh. I am actively throwing protein bars at him.
23. Lol. Red. ❤️
F/O Ask Game!!
A list of questions to answer about your f/o!! You guys can just go down the list and answer them all (I'd love to see it!!!) in a reblog, orrr you can reblog and have others ask you these questions in your inbox! Have fun!! PR.OSHI.P, NOT FOR YOU!
What animal does your f/o remind you of?
If you got your f/o a gift, what would you get them? 
What is your favorite hobby to think about doing with your f/o?
What chores would your f/o do around the house? Are there any they REALLY dislike?
Would you trust your f/o to drive a car?
What kind of ringtone or notification sound would you have for your f/o?
Would your f/o fight someone online? 
Does your f/o believe in soulmates?
How would you introduce your f/o to your friends? How do you think that would go? 
What's the first scenario that comes to your head when you think of being with your f/o?
What dynamic would you use to describe you and your f/o? 
What color do you associate with your f/o? 
How would your f/o introduce you to those they care about? How do you think that would go?
What animal do you remind your f/o of?
What would your f/o get you for Valentine's day, if anything? 
What does your f/o call you in their head? What do they call you aloud/to others?
What does your f/o like doing with you the most? 
How does your f/o show their love best? 
What's your f/o's favorite feature of yours?
What're your f/o's favorite personality traits of yours?
If your f/o drew you, how would you describe the art piece?
Does your f/o share food with you?
What color would your f/o associate you with?
What?? Who's tagging their friends again?- not me... I just really wanna see yalls answers. Formal invitation lest you become worried I don't wanna see it. @jpeg-indulgence @starshakez @moxanji-real @frankys-wife @katsenbergs-soulmate @katanahusband @fl0ralsxgar @one-winged-dreams AND LITERALLY ANYONE WHO SEES THIS.
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salt-n-salt · 5 months ago
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Is this hypothetically Shane and Kendall
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YES
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(with a small caveat — shane says more pet names per capita throughout the day (farmer, kenny, ken, kid etc) and kendall says them way more infrequently but when he DOES say one it’s a million years long and makes no sense at all and hits like the blast of a thousand gamma rays. in a bad way. he’s banned from saying them in public as a result)
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pallases · 2 months ago
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IM FREEEEEE
#(FROM PROJECTS)#personal#the engineering chronicles#WILL HOPEFULLY NEVER NEED TO SLEEP THREE NIGHTS ON THE FLOOR OF THE ENGINEERING BUILDING AGAIN!!!#one class the final project was to build a karaoke machine which my partner and i had planned on making look like actual speakers and#microphone but we couldn’t find the stuff in time and her mom made a joke abt singing into hairbrushes and we decided to take that and#run lol we used a pink sparkly makeup box to store our circuit and cut out holes for the speakers and decorated it with makeup and put the#hairbrush mics inside and it was very fun actually and our class voted us as one of the groups to go to project day which was pretty cool!!#project day did get canceled bc of. asnow day which was unfortunate especially considering we stayed up until 4am the night before#preparing our documents for it and trying to perfect the karaoke machine when we could have been putting that time toward project number#2 😐 but whatever we still get our extra credit and i can say i qualified for it so im happy enough#then project 2 was for another class but we’re lab partners in both (+ another guy for this project) and it was digital monster pet so we#made a dragon i was mostly on design so i hand CADed the whole thing which was living hell if i never want to lay eyes on solidworks#again but also he came out very cute after MUCH hasle putting him together with all the wires and components bc our wires from the kit are#so bad they’re constantly getting disconnected from each other which we didn’t know would happen bc the labs we usually do we don’t have to#connect them together like that since you’re not routing them thru bodies etc and they’ve worked great until now but anywya.#i did the lcd faces and the light sensor and a couple other things + a lot of the code was copy and paste from past labs and fitting it to#suit the project but for the most part it was a shit ton of hardware on my end while she and the other guy managed the rest of the code#which i really wish i could have been more involved with but oh well. as it is though he’s my baby i birthed him <3 we’re planning on#meeting up over weekends next semester to change some stuff and add other extra features that we missed we got a decent grade 85% but we#all agreed we don’t want to leave him like this we want to add the extra features we had come up with and also i think we should switch out#our motors for servos bc the motors we were required to use#instead suck they’re not strong at all compared to what a servo can do for you. also we want to make it so you can not only pet him which w#already have with light sensors but also wash him with a Hall effect sensor and magnet so like we’d stick the sensor inside and the magnet#inside a little cad brush or sponge is what im envisioning and i have an expression in mind for what we’d do then. also paint him and#redesign the platform he stands on bc it’s rlly cramped and also make a pcb bc we only have him with the microcontroller and breadboards rn#and i might mess with his face piece a bit too im not sure. oh and speakers!!! those were technically a requirement but we didn’t get them#done on time but i want to make him play music sooooo bad so definitely that. anyway want to be more involved in the software when we do#all this. pretty excited actually :]
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rxttenfish · 9 months ago
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things that make miravi what it is, for me: miranda wholeheartedly believes what aaravi says about being a video game protagonist and seeing the UI and everything.
listen, miranda's entire Bit is believing what people say to her and what they give to her. this is what gets her labelled as naive, yes, but also i think it can go the other way too, where she can very easily meet people where they're at and not be overly confrontational about what they care about.
and no one ever really seems to believe aaravi when she talks about being the hero? as in, this too is another part of the joke, that aaravi is part of a different genre that isn't the one she's actually inhabiting, so everything she says comes with a lot of tongue-in-cheek and no one else giving it a lot of weight or credence. her being the chosen hero has a lot more significance to aaravi herself than anyone else, and even in the moments where aaravi is focused on, its always centered around this being something important to her, sectioned off from the rest of the game and the rest of the characters by detachment.
but if you put the two of these together... miranda's a big proponent of fairytales. she knows about the prophesied hero, this is something that is important to her, that she already puts weight in. and aaravi says, yes, she is a prophesied hero, she's here to save people, she's here to do good, she's the one this story is about.
and i think miranda would sincerely believe her without any real stipulations or doubt. if anything, miranda would get excited! she'd become an enabler if anything, wanting to hear more, wanting to see more, wanting to see aaravi save the world, wanting to see her be the hero, be the thing of legends. she wants to know about aaravi's exploits! where has she been? what monsters has she defeated along the way? has she won a game of wits? has she found a legendary magical sword to help her along? miranda wants to see it all! she wants to hype up aaravi, because she loves this and she believes in aaravi too!
and i think that'd be good for aaravi! i think she could genuinely benefit from having someone wholeheartedly be in her corner, to play cheerleader for her, to not doubt her all the time or have to struggle to convince her of any part of it. in general i think aaravi deserves more support than she gets, that it would do her very good in feeling confident and assured in herself, in not having to struggle with perceived insecurity in so many things all the time. she is the hero! someone does believe her! someone does think she's helpful and good and protective! not to mention i think it'd benefit her to have someone to talk about all of this to, someone who isn't judging her and isn't a therapist, who she can feel safe and secure with in turn.
and i think it would do miranda good too, to have someone who appreciates her help and wants her help, who she can feel like she's helping and being good in doing so. miranda does have a tangible motivation in wanting to make her friends happy and be liked, and i think having someone who appreciates her efforts would also be good for her.
i think they both deserve to feel like they're being good and doing good! i think it'd be good for them to just have someone who unironically appreciates what they're doing and believes them when they say who they are!
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icewindandboringhorror · 1 year ago
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There's always a slight yearning in the back of my mind wishing I had been born in the right place, time, family situation, income level, etc. to have just lived in one single house for my entire life. Imagine being born in a place that still suits you, even through all of your personal evolutions and etc. The idea of deep familiarity with an area because you've lived and explored it for 40+ years, being encased in a web of memories and connections. Being able to clean out your old childhood bedroom and find personal artifacts, to dig in the yard and remember. I know those lives can still be plenty imperfect, but there's just something so seemingly solid and stable and Grounding about it that I sometimes wish I could have.. (At least from my outside perspective as someone who's moved around a bit geographically and even within the same area, never lives in the same house/ apartment /etc. for more than a few years usually.) Like... having a place that is printed upon, fully your own, rather than chronically a visitor, every thought of a space always tempered with the notion that one day soon you'll have to pack it all up again, etc. There's something peaceful about the permanence.
#I think also because I'm a very nostalgic person - THOUGH not in the way that somep poeple mean when they say nostalgia because I've realiz#ed that to some people apparently it means like.. more of a sad emotional thing? Or when I talk about being nostalgic they say 'me too' and#then describe how they're always depressed dwelling on the past wishing they could revisit it and replaying it and feeling sad and etc.#Whereas for me - it's not in a deep or emotional way at all. It's very detached - kind of like someone who is doing like a scientific#cataloguing of something? I don't feel any remorse or sadness or longing or sitting there sobbing for hours over people/pets I've lost or#etc. It's more like a fun contemplative excercise and extension of self analysis plus just documentation. Like I know your memory fades as#you get older OR even as stuff is actively ongoing humans have terrible recall - even the ones who are less emotional/more focused on#accuracy our minds still twist things or etc. SO I looove to have documentations of everything possible so that in the future I will have#as full and complete of a view of myself as I possibly can. sure the image will undoubtedly be a little distorted but having real evidence#of how something was at a time is very valuable. You look through old messages or letters or something and you always find other alternate#versions of yourself. Not in a worse way like inherently inferior Previous Models Of You who haven't yet been perfected but even just in a#neutral way like 'what they're saying is not a BAd thing but also is not how I would say that today.' etc. ANYWAY I find it really interest#ing to document and remember things and love revisiting the past - not in a sad way - but just like. curiosity. reminiscing and recalling#and filling in gaps. or trying to have the same feeling I felt at a previous time so I can remember what it was. Collecting information for#documentation purposes. Like for example - I would love to go back and tour all of my old childhood houses/apartments. Not to like#sit in the middleof them and cry and go 'ohhh my childhood waughhh' - but literally because I want to take detailed photographs so I#can remeber exatly what they looked like and recreate them in sims or some other digital way. Why? idk. just to gather the information. If#I ever live to like 80 years old and I'm still reflecting on my life curious about the dteails of it. I want to be able to fire up my#ancient windows 10 laptop I've kept all these years and open up the sims 4 and tour my old home with accuracy etc. ??#Not sure why really. Maybe an extension of how I generally care a lot about having an 'accurate' view of things? Like I would rather be#accurate than be happy. I don't understand 'ignorance is bliss' because I would always rather know. I always always in any situation am mor#focused on 'what is the well researched practical truth' than about 'how does this make me feel' or etc. Truth above ALL else even if it#were to make me miserable. Aka why I'm a 'boring' 'annoying' 'UM actually..' type of killjoy lol because it's very hard for me to understan#that some people can enjoy something or have a good time even not knowing the full facts of a situation or etc. BUT anyway. since that is#some core driver of my personality for whatever reason (just the plague of ennegram type 5 perhaps lol) maybe that also drives me to my#kind of minor obsession with like 'I must have a complete view and calatoguing of my life that is as accurate as possible within the means#i have' . Is it REALLY important for me to know the exact layout of on of my first childhood bedrooms? no. materially it does nothing for m#in life. BUT hey. it would make a great addition to the Accurate Life Story Catalogue lol. ANYWAY.. But I think a lot of wanting to live in#one place forever is not just the ease of documentation. but the sense of having a constant. Much of what i crave most in life is stability#& familiarity &routine bc of how my brain works. And it just would feel so good to be Settled. Never uproot again. One little place FOREVER
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gothsuguru · 6 months ago
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i love muting people on twitter some of you bitches are very dumb
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#what do you MEAN gojo wasn’t traumatized by toji??? 😭#i don’t think that gege has to spoonfeed every single morsel of information for you… like if you READ the manga you’d know 😭#why is the reason gojo works so tirelessly on his infinity??? during his fight w sukuna why was he reminded of toji???#LIKE HELLO??? this is why heavily shipper brains are so useless to me#this one was goge shipper and for some reason they just completely watered down gojo’s personality/trauma like HUH#geto isn’t the only person who went through things 😭#also saying that geto was the only person who saw gojo as a person… that’s true to an extent#pre-defection geto ABSOLUTELY! gojo never was around Normal People so that’s why he acts the way he acted it’s obvious#but i’d argue post-defection geto… even for a little bit… saw gojo as a tool rather than a human#bc he even tells gojo that if suguru was gojo then his impossible ideals wouldn’t be impossible anymore simply by the virtue of being gojo#i think after people realize satoru’s strength they immediately throw away his humanity#which is something that his kids don’t really care much for… like yeah gojo sensei is strong but the 1st years don’t gaf that much 😭#i think they see him more for his personality than his Strength but they obviously know he’s the strongest#and i think they know he wants them to be strong too#satoru also said he can only save people who want to be saved#i think he’s in constant of his students for that reason too… they save each other & communicate & are allowed to be kids#i think also bc satoru finds it so important to enjoy the mundane things of life and to enjoy friendships bc that’s the only thing that +#he himself had cultivated during his years as as student too#this became a rant but . @ shippers & @ anyone stupid… stop watering down gojo#it’s my biggest pet peeve idk why but nothing pisses me off more in the jjk sphere than people watering down gojo#just bc his trauma manifested in different ways doesn’t mean that he wasn’t hurt 😭#like don’t forget about satoru gojo!!!!!! he’s a lot more emotionally perceptive/mature than people give him credit for#personal
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twistpixel · 2 months ago
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Something about like coming into fandom spaces and getting the impression that the enlightened smart opinion is adversarial and dislike the writers. I don’t think that’s BAD I think the critique of especially biases and prejudices coming through in the writing is especially worthwhile and noting like “oh this writer had an idea for this characters direction that everybody hated” is useful but like. Hm. At the end of the day we all like the stuff they wrote enough to be blogging about it. Or whatever
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