#and i love his voice but i’ve already listened to all his audios 3 times

[jennifer-jeong]

Smut | AFAB!Reader Voice Message

SUMMARY He's on a work trip and you decide to record him a little gift

CONTENT NSFW, 18+, smut, assigned female at birth (AFAB) reader, m and f masturbation, sex toy usage, orgasm, implied relationship, ALL CHARACTERS ARE 18+

WORD COUNT: 1278

GOJO SATORU, KAMO CHOSO, AVENTURINE, RAFAYEL, MARIUS VON HAGEN

It was a nice evening, the sun was just setting and there was a nice breeze coming through the window of your apartment that you shared with your lovely boyfriend. He was on a work trip so you were feeling a bit lonely and also a bit… needy. Yeah it had only been a week but could you really blame yourself? You were ovulating, of course you kinda needed him. So, sitting up in bed and feeling a bit cheeky, you decide to record him a little message. A video message felt like a bit too much of an endeavor so you settled on an audio message. After preparing your favorite “materials” you pressed record.

He was only a few time zones away so it wasn’t too late at night for him yet. He heard the notification come up on his phone and read it over.

Heyyyy, I’ve been missing you so I made this for you cuz I thought you might be missing me too pookieee <3 enjoy with headphones ;)

Your boyfriend raised an eyebrow and then smiled, realizing what you had probably done. He was in his hotel room for the night so he figured he’d get ready for bed and take a little listen and indulge himself.

After situating himself in bed in his pj’s (sweatpants and a white t-shirt), he replied to your text.

Hey pretty girl, miss you too <3 I’m about to give it a listen 😏

You liked the message and waited for his response, having already finished yourself.

After seeing your reaction, he put in his earbuds and turned off his light, setting his phone down on the nightstand. He pressed play, closed his eyes, and your pretty voice filled his ears.

“Hey baby” you said out of breath already. “I miss you- mmmphff” his eyes shot open and his cock twitched. Your heavy breathing and light moans sending a wave of lust through his body as he swallowed hard.

“hah ngh… miss you a lot… hah- wish you were here- mmm!” His eyes started to roll back into his head as he clenched his jaw, hands sliding down to palm his already half hard cock.

“Wish this was you inside me,” you said, followed by moans. “You always fill me up s’gooood… nothing feels the same.” He could hear your vibrator buzzing in the background of the audio, turning him on even more knowing that you were actually getting yourself off just thinking about him. He threw his head back, pushing it into the pillow thinking about how you were fucking yourself with a dildo and upset that it wasn’t his dick. He let out a light moan at the thought and touched himself through his pants, painfully hard at this point.

“Only you make me feel that good baby, I really need you,” he could hear your small “ah’s” and the occasional “mmph” between your sentences. “I’ll make you feel s’good when you’re back,” that made him roll his eyes back again, blinking slow and with lidded eyes thinking about you.

“Sorry this is all I can do for you now baby,” he started pulling down his sweats and boxers, “...the only way I can help get you off.” He groaned when he finally freed his cock out of the confines of his pants.

“Bet you’re already all hot and bothered hm?” you giggle “not that I mind.” He moaned at your slight teasing. “Thinking about it actually turns me on more- ngh,” he started to stroke himself, his tip sensitive and leaky because of you.

“Mmmmm fffucckkkk” you moaned lowly “m’ close daddy.” He let out a shaky sigh hearing the pet name, it was so fucking filthy that it was erotic to him but he still loved it and you did too.

You continued to edge yourself closer and closer to the edge in the recording and he followed suit. Your moans got more and more whiny and loud, barely able to think of more dirty talk for him because your brain was in overdrive focusing on all the stimulation. He adored this part of the recording though, just listening to you pleasure yourself, saying the occasional “feels s’good” or “yes” between needy whines.

Your already fast breathing picked up a minute or two later and he noticed it, knowing that you were already close. “P-please cum with me,” you sobbed out, “I need ittt… hgnhh.”

Your boyfriend cursed under his breath trying not to let out too much noise in the hotel room. But it was so difficult when you made him so sensitive and you weren’t even here. He sped up his hand, having it now well lubricated with a mixture of precum and saliva he spit onto his hand. The erotic wet sounds of him stroking himself paired perfectly with your recording to turn him on to the absolute max.

“I’m thinking about you,” your voice starts again, clearly shaky. “How it feels when we cum t-together mmm,” you say through labored breathing. At this point you’ve managed to bring him to the edge with you, he’s bucking his hips upwards, fucking his fist imagining it was your gummy pussy squeezing him so heavenly like you always do. His hair is starting to stick to his forehead slightly as his body continues to overheat from all the pleasure. He grabs his shirt and pulls it up to hold between his teeth preemptively, not wanting to stain his shirt and also to muffle any moans that escape.

“Fuckkk- ugh- mmm!” you cry through the phone as his body tenses, abs spasming as he fucks his fist and free hand gripping the sheets. “G-gonna… gonna cum!” you babble as you breathe heavy into the mic, each moan rising in pitch until your breath hitches, letting out loud groans as your waves crash over you. “hh- ah! c-cumming! hmmnnnnn cummingg nghhh” he hears in his ears, throwing him over the edge with you as he thinks about how your walls clench and twitch on him when you cum. How you gush arousal all over him when you finish on his cock. His own breathing has sped up at this point as he bites down on his shirt and lets out a strained “f-fuck!” and moans your name quietly. Ropes of cum cover his torso as his hips stutter upwards into his hand. His legs are shaky as he comes down from his high, riding through it with slow strokes, almost overstimulating himself since you were still coming down.

Slowly your breathing slowed and you ended the recording with a quiet “love you baby.” He took his earbuds out and blinked a few times, taking deep breaths as he lays there, enjoying his afterglow and also thinking a bit of “wow… well that just happened.” He stays in that moment a while longer before grabbing the nearby tissue box to clean himself up and run to the washroom quickly before settling back down in bed to text you a reply.

Holy fuck I’m saving that Omg did you like it I fucking loved it wow You really just made me that for free LMFAO mm hmm just for you baby Don’t worry I’ll be sure to give you a payment in another way plus the tip of course Idk if the pun makes that better or worse. ANYWAYS ilysm babyyy I’m glad you liked ittt :) I love you sososo much too pretty girl, can’t wait to see you so I can love you properly in person For now sleep well though, good night <3 Hehe MWAH I’m looking forward to it sleep well too baby, good nighttttt <3

|| MASTERLIST ♡ || Thank you for reading! ||

[kenandeliza]

a collection of ideas of a post-suspendium Golden Age comics Billy Batson if he ended up in the 21st century (pick any comic continuity

EDIT: IF YOU SEE THIS POST HAVING A WEIRD/REPEATING PARAGRAPH/FORMAT, LET ME KNOW BECAUSE TUMBLR ISNT WORKING FOR MY MOBILE

1.adoption scenario

(If a leaguer wanted to adopt Billy, he’d just show them his birth certificate)

Billy smirking:” Sorry, you can’t legally adopt a grandpa”

2. Billy teasing with a smug boomer voice: “Back in my day, we used to play with atomic machines!”

3. youtube

Billy:thanks for showing me how to use a modern phone (insert friend from 21st century)! But I wonder, where is the tv remote for changing the youtube channel? And Where is the news?

(Friend from the 21st century):*sighs* it’s so over

4. Old friends

Aside from the fawcett city heroes, Billy in this case probably relates more to the older heroes like wildcat, Alan scott or Jay Garrick, maybe they have multiple team ups in the past and would reminiscent over it (the rest having their favorite drinks while Billy preferring his hot chocolate ice cream)

5. Teasing

The younger hero teams who know his identity would teasingly call him a “boomer”, Billy wanted to protest that he technically was born before boomers but they ignored it and still teased him about it.

to the rest of the heroes who didn’t know about his identity, they assume captain marvel is more than centuries old, and thinks this is the reason the kid heroes calls him a boomer.

6. Jokes

Billy: “oh so these memes are like what replaces comic strips i used to read, how nice”

Some of these ideas are taken from the fanfics i’ve written, some just came to me inside my head, but it’s fun to think about it.

(Edited: added more scenarios)

7. Caprisuns

Caprisuns werent invented yet when Billy was in suspendium. After getting out of suspendium, He really likes caprisun.

Other leaguers would be confused, Marvel's liking of caprisun is comparable to Martian Manhunter's love of oreos. When asked about when his capri sun addiction started, Marvel shrugged, "They weren't made before I was born, so it was only recent"

The league is now confused as to how old marvel is. Wonder Woman relates to this with her fascination of ice cream flavors.

8. Billy automatically put on a Mid-atlantic accent whenever he is near a microphone due to his habit and work with Whiz station for his TV segments as well as radio programs.

Whenever Captain Marvel uses a communicator, he unintentionally uses a mid-atlantic accent (this confuses the leaguers, "who is this guy!?"). Some of the leaguers enjoyed listening to his voice

Marvel would occasionally file an audio JL report (yes, with the same mid-atlantic accent) when he's on a hurry and couldn't type it out with his typewriter (he still finds it difficult to use a computer) : "And there you have it, folks! In a nutshell, I managed to handle the There was an outbreak of imps but Mary and I already took care of it, Junior apprehend the acrobat after a terible case of Moonitis, the three of us thwarted Mr. Mind's dastardly scheme to seize control of the sun, and we all prevented Sivana from being promoted to "King of Earth" by hurling his atomic bomb straight into the heart of the sun itself! That's the latest from me, This is Captain Marvel, signing off!"

Leaguer: "Why does he sound like a radio host commenting on a football game?"

Other leaguer:*shrugs*

9. Billy watches a cgi lion movie for the first time

..and thought innocently that there are other talking tigers like tawky tawny.

Some of these ideas are taken from the fanfics i’ve written, some just came to me inside my head, but it’s fun to think about it.

[otomehonyaku]

DIABOLIK LOVERS Haunted Dark Bridal ☽ Genteiban DVD Mini Drama Translation ☽ Side Story III (Kanato, Laito, Shuu)

Original title: DIABOLIK LOVERS 限定版 SPECIAL DISK V Side Story III Voiced by Kaji Yūki (Kanato), Hirakawa Daisuke (Laito), Toriumi Kōsuke (Shuu) English translation by @otomehonyaku Click here for the audio (thank you to @uzi-boozii for providing the audio!)

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Please do not reuse or post my translations elsewhere or translate my work into other languages without my permission.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

This mini drama takes place after Shuu drinks Yui's blood for the second time, when she comes to him looking for answers. Is it just me or do more of you think these CDs are so much fun to listen to? Like hearing them talk about Yui when she's not there and kind of fantasising about her and stuff... ♡ (⇀ 3 ↼) Enjoy listening and reading along! I'm already working on the last one for this series.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

[This scene takes place after Shuu tastes Yui’s blood the second time, when she comes to him looking for answers.]

00:00[Kanato is having dinner. Laito is at the table, too, stretching and yawning exaggeratedly.]

Laito: Gosh, things are boring around here. Ironically enough, it’s difficult to relax when it’s too quiet. Right, Kanato?

Kanato: Laito. Can’t you see I’m having dinner with Teddy? Please don’t bother us. Teddy. When we’ve finished eating this petit gâteau, should we have a roll cake next?

[Kanato takes another bite.]

K: Hmm… Delicious, isn’t it? A chocolate cake with a core of molten chocolate sauce… I can’t get enough of it.

L: Is it really that good? Hmm. When it comes to sweets, I’d rather have macarons.

K: I like macarons, too.

L: They come in all different kinds of pretty colours and delicious flavours… They’re kinda fun, aren’t they? Don’t you feel a little bad for Teddy, though? You just force sweets on him.

K: Not at all. Teddy loves sweets just as much as I do. Right, Teddy?

L: Well, alright.

01:36 [Laito pauses briefly.]

L: Hmm? 

K: Is something the matter?

L: Don’t you think something smells mouthwateringly sweet around here?

K: Come to think of it, yes. A completely different sweet scent is getting mixed up with my gâteau. 

L: It’s not sweets, though. It’s a much thicker, saccharine scent… The scent of something that could satisfy my appetite.

[Someone’s walking nearby.]

L: Ah, I see… Could this be the culprit behind that sickly-sweet scent?

[The door opens. Shuu walks in, music blasting from his earphones]

K: That sweet smell is coming from Shuu.

S: I don’t have anything sweet on me, though.

L: Hehe. I know you don’t have anything on you. It's Bitchlet's blood I smell, after all.

K: What’s with this smell? I’ve never smelled something so sweet before.

[Laito gets up and sniffs the air.]

02:55L: This smell… Is that really Bitchlet? I don’t remember her smelling like this…

[Laito inhales deeply.]

L: No, it is her, but it’s as though something is changing…

[Shuu sits down with a groan.]

L: Shuu… What’ve you been doing with Bitchlet?  I think I already know the answer, hehe.

S: There’s no need to ask, then.

L: You’ve had your fill of Bitchlet’s blood at its very finest, haven’t you? I could tell just by the scent as you walked through the hall just now.

[Kanato stands up and walks over to Shuu.]

K: I agree. Lately, her blood has smelled so sweet that just the slightest whiff of it could drive me wild.

Ah, I want to taste her right now.

L: Right, right. I usually don’t get tempted to drink just by the scent of blood, but even smelling her blood on Shuu right now is so arousing… I wonder if it’s because Bitchlet’s awakened? (1)

[Shuu sighs heavily.]

L: Tell me, what does her blood taste like now? It must’ve gotten much sweeter, right? Just a little taste is enough to bewitch you, and the sweetness of it all must be so satisfying.

S: Not yet.

L: Huh?

S: She hasn’t awakened yet.

L: She hasn’t? But for her to smell like that…

S: Well, it’s a stark difference from when I fed on her before. Her blood was burning hot…

05:00 K: So she is changing, after all.

L: Ah… I want to taste her at her peak as well… What does she taste like now, Shuu?

[Shuu has fallen asleep.]

L: Hey, come on! Don’t just fall asleep and leave good old Laito hanging!

[Laito starts pestering Shuu, slapping and shoving him.]

L: Shuu! Tell me how it was before you nod off!

S: Ugh, fuck off. My stomach’s full, so I’m going to sleep. 

L: Oh, don’t start. You sleep around the clock even when you’re not full. Bitchlet’s awakening is nigh!

S: I don’t care.

K: I want my turn to drain her dry soon.

L: Hey, Kanato! You can’t just drain her dry. We should play around with her more, be cruel to her… toy with her body and soul until she feels so good that her blood becomes intoxicating! Hehe.

K: She isn’t yours, Laito. I want my fair share of tormenting and playing with her. I’m sure tastes even more delicious when she’s scared beyond her wits.

06:22 L: But Kanato, you tend to drink too much. The plan is to keep Bitchlet around for a long while, so you can’t kill her.

K: Why? Isn’t it much better to preserve the beauty of living creatures for all eternity, no matter what it is? That’s why I’ll turn her into a doll while she’s as beautiful as she is now.

L: Well, I understand what you’re saying, Kanato, but I don’t want to give up on fooling around with her just yet. Say, what do you suppose is the most fun, the most exciting way to drink her delicious blood?

K: As for me, I enjoy feeding on her most while imagining her as a wax doll. Teddy enjoys it, too.

L: But Kanato, you can’t actually turn her into one just yet, okay? Speaking of which–Shuu, you haven’t drained her completely, have you?

S: Of course not. I wasn’t that hungry. Besides, we were interrupted halfway through. By that old man.

L: Old man?

S: Richter.

[Laito and Kanato are at a loss.]

L: Huh, I see. So our uncle came by.

[Laito sits back down.]

L: I wonder what he was visiting for.

S: It’s not like I know. If you want to know, you should ask Richter himself.

L: You have a hunch, though, don’t you?

S: I told you, I have no idea.

K: Come to think of it, Subaru mentioned he’d seen Richter as well.

L: Oh my. He’s rarely ever been here before. I wonder what’s going on. Maybe he’s up to something… Heh.

[Shuu sits upright.]

K: Is something the matter for you to get up so suddenly, Shuu?

08:47 S: Her blood…

L: Bitchlet’s blood…?

S: I think Richter’s after it.

L: Hmm… Well, Bitchlet’s blood’s been getting more and more delicious lately, after all.

K: But in terms of prey, there’s plenty of others for him to choose from. He has no reason to go out of his way just to get her.

L: But she is close to awakening. Right, Shuu?

S: Don’t put this on me. You’re bothersome.

L: There Shuu goes again with his ‘bothersome’... Are you fine with Uncle stealing our awakened Bitchlet’s blood away from us?

S: He can do whatever.

L: Well, I’m not fine with it. I have a bad feeling about this. I don’t want to simply hand her blood over to Uncle.

K: Indeed. She is our sacrificial bride, after all.

L: Yes, yes. Well, then–we were talking about the most exciting ways to suck Bitchlet’s blood. What do you think, Shuu?

S: I told you, don’t start with this.

10:00 L: But we’re dying to know! Ayato and I have been fooling around with her too, you know. We cornered her in the underground waterway. Ayato bit her neck, and I her thigh… Come to think of it, her awakening must’ve already been close. The feel of her veins pulsing under her skin gave off the most tempting scent… It turned me on so much.   Well, Ayato made himself scarce rather quickly, though.

K: I don’t understand how you could enjoy that, Laito. It’s obvious that it’s much more enjoyable to take the time to savour the taste of her blood. What’s fun about sharing that experience with someone else?

L: What’s fun about it? The fact that someone else besides me is driving her to ecstasy, and watching Bitchlet’s face as she desperately tries to bear it is plenty of fun for me. She can resist all she wants, but it tends to be no use when we hold her down. When I see that pained look, that desperation plastered across her face, or the way her features contort when she’s overwhelmed by pleasure… It’s so hot. It makes me lose control of myself.

K: Yes, I love watching her face twist in fear or agony. Right, Teddy?

L: Hey, Kanato. Let’s play with Bitchlet together next time. I’m sure it’ll be plenty fun.

K: I have no interest in such games.

L: Huh? But Bitchlet’s so close to awakening now, so it would make for even sweeter blood. Ah, the pleasure would come crashing over her like waves… I’m getting hot just talking about it.

12:02 K: You’re too persistent. I told you I don’t want to!

[Kanato slams his fist onto the table. The translator actually jumps in her chair because it was so loud.]

K: Why do you not understand?! Teddy, how do you feel about Laito not listening to me? Everyone’s bullying me.

[Kanato starts crying.]

L: Oh, come on, Kanato, don’t cry.

K: I… don’t want to do anything together… with anyone else but Teddy.

L: Ah. Well, Kanato’s out of the question, then. How about you, Shuu? Let’s feed on Bitchlet together.

[Shuu is dozing off.]

L: Hey, Shuu.

S: I told you to not bother with me. I don’t care how I feed. I only feed to satisfy my appetite.

L: Huh. I figured you’d say that.

K: Come to think of it, I’ve gotten hungry.

[Kanato gets up.]

13:20 K: Teddy, shall we go and have a snack? What would you like? Yeah, right you are. Let’s have our favourite treat. She’s exceptionally sweet and delicious, after all.

[Kanato opens the door.]

K: Hehe. I’m looking forward to it.

[Kanato leaves the room.]

L: Hehe. Wait a minute. He’s talking about having Bitchlet as a snack, isn’t he?

[Laito gets up and runs after Kanato.]

L: Hold up, Kanato! I’m not giving you a head start!

[Laito leaves the room.]

S: Ugh. I can finally sleep in peace.

[Shuu lies down.]

14:17 S: So, Richter is here. That bothersome asshole. Could it have anything to do with her awakening? Heh. It’s none of my business. She’s a mere human. She’s our prey. That’s all she is…

[kalifornia1025]

The Resident Patient Pt. 1 (SPOILERS)

Pt. 1 notes for Resident Patient, let’s go!!!

“I need a catchphrase”- sir you already have a bunch, just take your pick

Gross, weird, and spooky? SAY LESS!

He’s getting the mic fixed…not replaced…I can’t even be mad about his dedication to the mic 

“You ever dropped it?” “About 16 times, yeah”- HOW DID IT NOT BREAK SOONER?!

John you seriously share your Dad Jokes with anyone, huh?

Murder case already? Splendid

Ooh, John and Sherlock alternating clever deductions between each other, love it LOVE IT!

“Hips don’t lie, mate” SHAKIRA SHAKIRA (…sorry)

…there’s a what on his WHAT?

Oh wow, love affair turned murder? Nice

“Well observed Doctor” “Thank you Detective” YOU TWO STOP BEING SO CUTE

THE HIGH FIVES ARE BACK!!

Sherlock is so real about not wanting cold butter for his toast, because I’ve lost so many good toasts when trying to spread cold butter on them…I’d rather have a plain toast than a massacred one

“To the dead condom man” - now John why did you have to say that?

“We are [magnetic] aren’t we? Opposites attract and all that sort of thing” - sir you can’t just say that and be surprised we ship you two (don’t even get me STARTED on the mailbag episodes…)!

Hehe more canon acknowledgment of Sherlock’s neurodiversity

“Just…a little bored” “You just solved a murder” - no joke this immediately make me think of that one scene from BBC Sherlock 

“Ugh” - why were so SASSY with that, Sherlock????

Aww John already knows to calm Sherlock down from getting worked up without cases, he knows him so well!

“Christ sake you sound like the bloody listeners” - ope, I feel called out (not a shoutout, but close enough)

“Fill a brother in” - oh…oh no John why

I like how Sherlock isn’t always right, like sometimes he’ll be SO CLOSE but get it wrong and go “bugger”, it reminds us that he’s not too perfect (which I prefer)

Oh nice, I like when John brings up his educational background!

I REALLY like Percy’s voice <3 <3

“Little prick, but enough of me!” - John if want the short jokes to stop THIS ISN’T HELPING

‘Chugging along’, ‘Deduction Junction’, ‘little observations may leave the carriage’…Sherlock you REALLY do like trains and it’s the cutest thing 

Okay, NOW we’re getting into the main case!

Oooh spooky element! That’s a little different from the main story, but in a good way

Sleepy John is so cute to me!

Mariana!!

“Heysville, ugh God I’m starting to sound like you [John], yuck” - rude but you’re not wrong

Mic shenanigans seem to be an ongoing theme right now, first it was the audio distortions in Red Circle and now the mic is magnetic

Oh hello…random nurse lady?

Well that interaction was certainly rushed, and TOTALLY not suspicious (she says sarcastically)

‘Johnny boy’? Wow, that’s a first

Oh God this is reminding me of Creeping Man pt. 2 cliffhanger…

OMG OMG JOHN WHY ARE YOU STRESSING ME??!!

So…that was part 1…and the case already sounds promising! I didn’t think we’d get such a dramatic cliffhanger in the first part, yet here we are. I’m REALLY liking the dynamic of John and Sherlock in this episode. They seem more in-tuned with each other! Unfortunately not a lot of Mariana but at least we got a heads that she wasn’t gonna be in this case much (plus she mentioned she was glad not to be ‘dealing with this case’…so that’s foreboding). Anyway STRONG start to the case, and we’ve still got two more parts so stay tuned (and hang tight John, Sherlock will be there soon)!

[vilsoo]

tame me if you can⌇phone guy <3

phone guy’s been so needy for you it’s almost pathetic. being away for a few days made him ponder the ways you’ve been treating him. he loves the attention you give him. he feels special and appreciated when you call him your good boy. he knows his only purpose is to be used by you and make you feel good whenever you have your way with him. you don’t allow him to think for himself at all; being treated like a dumb fucktoy is all he’s ever known.

but where is his reward for being such a good boy for you? a needy, deprived, desperate fuck toy like him couldn’t bare the lack of attention he’s been getting. his cock has been pulsing and aching so terribly; one hand slowly stroking it through his pants while the other holds the phone, letting out soft sighs and groans. he knows he’s not allowed to touch himself when you’re gone, but it just wasn’t fair that you haven’t been returning the pleasure he deserves…

you haven’t been picking up the phone, so he would leave a voice message. “you thought this was just me constantly begging for you to use me like the needy slut i am?” he taunted into the phone the way you taunt to him. “i may be needy, baby, but i need attention… i wanna feel good… so i’ll be giving myself what i deserve. if you don’t give me as much as i give you, i won’t behave. it’s up to you to decide what you’re gonna do to me.”

he could feel the precum already drooling down from his tip and onto his hands, fisting his cock faster for you to hear the lewd and sloppy noises. it turned him on much more knowing that you’re gonna come back to him after hearing the voicemail all pent up and mad from how disobedient he was. putting him in his place for being a greedy slut, taking your frustrations out on him, and reminding him who he belongs to. he fisted his cock faster as he thought about it, purposefully overstimulating himself silly over the phone like a mindless, pathetic whore.

“everyday you use me like your dumb breeding toy, baby. but not today. you only get to listen as i pump and milk myself so fucking hard over the phone while you get nothing.”

he made sure you can hear every staggering moan, every hitching breath, every muttered curse, every pretty little whimper and whine of his. he kept squirming uncontrollably on the sheets as he felt his cock tighten from his orgasm nearing. this was exactly how you would punish him. but it was too bad you couldn’t do it yourself. it was too bad you couldn’t see the mess he’s making all over himself. and he couldn’t fucking wait to see how you’ll react; how you’ll punish and use him until he literally can’t think for himself.

“by the time you finish listening… i’ll be waiting for you when you come home.”

ALL WORKS BELONG TO VILSOO © 2023. do not steal, plagiarize, translate, or repost any of my works outside tumblr. inspired by the sluttiest, most submissive and breedable audio i’ve ever heard in my life 😋 (nsfw, headphones required)

[taelonsamada]

I posted 4,359 times in 2022

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My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

WAIT WHAT?!

9 VIDEOS!?

IT’S EVEN BETTER THAN I WAS EXPECTING!!

👀

Geordi?? ASHER?! SAM?!? MAYBE? PLEASE?!

182 notes - Posted May 15, 2022

#4

So I’ve downed almost a litre of water after that, and I’m having FEELINGS about Sam’s newest audio!!! Putting it under a cut cause spoilers, nsfw talk and cause I’m gonna ramble

First off, the fact that Darlin was sitting waiting on his porch for him was so fucking cute but also heartbreaking at the same time. That they wanted to talk to him badly enough to sit and wait on his porch for an hour, but didn’t want to bother him by letting him know. That they would just wait there for as long as it took.

And then hearing him mutter while he dug around and gave them a key was just… 😭

This also explains why Sam didn’t get an Aftershock. He stuffed it all down. There wasn’t anything to show from him because he wasn’t ready to show it yet. Also, fuck yes, reclaiming his love of driving, not letting Alexis take that from him.

I cried so many times listening to him recount what he went through. Especially the part about David. But listening to him lament and spiral, grinding on how he could have done this, how this could have happened if he’d still been that… the PAIN in his voice, his struggles not to burst into tears on the spot. I knew I was going to need to hydrate for this video, but I didn’t think I’d need to from crying so hard.

Also, how dare you, Sam Collins, claim you’re not a poet, after giving the single most beautiful confession I’ve ever heard. I know this wasn’t technically his confession video, that he already did, but he dropped The L Word this time around, and in such a beautiful, devastatingly sweet way… just… FUCK…

But oh man, when I heard that man say he was ready, all the air left my lungs, I just… 🥵

I nearly died when he stopped and assured Darlin about their body ❤️ to have something the fandom largely headcanoned be made official was SUCH a giddy moment for me X3 and he did such a wonderful job of it too ♥️ and that he stopped IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DEED to give us ANOTHER heartbreakingly sweet confession about how important Darlin is to him, and how much this meant??

But tHE SPICY LEVEL OF THIS??? HOLY SHIT????

MR SAM COLLINS, THAT WAS QUITE A BIT OF GROWLING AND SNARLING YOU DID, SIR.

Yet even with how… INTENSE he got, he still constantly asked and sought out those enthusiastic YES’s every time, and this is why we love him 😊

BUT BY THE FATES SIR, SOME OF THE LINES YOU WERE DROPPING???

“Pitch those hips of yours up a bit” 👀💦

“You wanna ride your cowb - Oh, you little - Get over here.” 😈

“I oughta whoop your ass for that one you menace… But I suppose there’s better things to be doin’ with that work of art you got back here.” SIR!!

“You fittin’ to bounce on this cock?” 🥵

“You gonna be good for me? Cause I plan to be very good to you” @////@

But then he wanted to just stay there and hold them after and I just… I just… 😭 ❤️ ✨

I just… I gotta go… drink some more water… and lay down for a bit… and cry

244 notes - Posted April 16, 2022

#3

So… hey @sealriously-sealrious … I just wanna talk… about how I’ve barely been up an hour and I’m already dehydrated… cause of the SPICY LEVEL OF HUXLEY CONTENT YOU KEEP DISHING OUT ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? Seriously guys, go read their latest Huxley fic… be sure to bring a glass of water though, it’s most definitely STEAMY… Couldn’t resist a quick doodle of some of the imagery that stuck with me most ❤️‍🔥

258 notes - Posted March 29, 2022

#2

No words, just Tattooed Huxley

274 notes - Posted March 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Okay, so I may have fibbed a bit about this not being ready for a while… I just had so much fun, I couldn’t help it! Too bad Davey’s not having as much fun ^^;; go read about the trouble Darlin’ puts him through here in @dominimoonbeam ‘s wonderful story

Yes, I will put the Redacted boys in jeans as much as I can. I still stubbornly hold to the fact that a pair of well fitted jeans are sexy as hell 😈

And yes, Angel totally got him that necklace as a joke, but he stubbornly wears it every day ♥️

Okay, now to get to work on those commissions LOL

416 notes - Posted March 30, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[vitaminwaterreviews]

S.E.S. - I'm Your Girl

It’s amazing that Wikipedia labels this album as “dance-pop” because it really isn’t. Or maybe I’m just frustrated at how many– actually let’s count. 5 songs definitely aren’t dance pop, 5 you could consider dance pop. So at max it’s half dance pop, and more likely it’s 3 or 4. Oof. Anyway, I’m kind of bored; this album really bored me by the end. But Unnamed Male Rapper was super present in this album, that’s interesting. I probably won’t save a single song from this album – average of 6.2. I’ll let that speak for itself. Maybe my expectations are still raised by Pink Tape.

Anyway, that’s the original project done with: I’ve listened to a full album by every SM girl group ever, all 10 of them. So what now?

I’m still not totally satisfied. The jump from The Grace to Oh! feels really jarring, so I think I’ll check out SNSD’s debut release. I also want to revisit Perfect Velvet, a bit more aespa, check out f(x)’s debut release, 4 Walls, maybe GOT the Beat too. I also might listen to another S.E.S. album or two, and maybe another Sugar album, maybe The Grace.

Usually I don’t include any songs that I already know, but I’ll make an exception this time around because 1) I make the rules here and 2) Not including the literal title track would be a bit odd.

(‘Cause) I’m Your Girl

Intro is moody and synthy

Yep, here’s the beat with the signature unnamed male rapper

Honestly I have nothing to type, I know this song really well

8/10, it’s a good song, it’s a jam, I listen to this when it comes on

Oh, My Love

More r&b than CIYG, bassy

Cute little harmonies for most of the chorus

The “oh yeahhh” is fun

Random guitar interjection

Seo Taiji moment lol

That’s it? Just one guitar moment?

6/10, it’s alright, I want more

Nonsense

That intro lol

Much more upbeat, the “ba da ba” is super fun

Why do I feel like I’m hearing seagulls?

More random male rapper(s)?

Really weird, distorted chorus(?) if that was the chorus anyway

Nice guitar here actually, this works well

(Dreams come true isn’t the only weird rap I guess)

Okay wait seriously what is going on here

Honestly though this is a bop, the synths in my left ear are fun

(Still despise stereo audio tbh)

The guitar in the chorus(?) really brings this song together, like if it wasn’t there then this song would feel so wrong

8/10, honestly that was really fun, campy

Dejavu

Ballad time?

Lol they got me

Horns are fun, bass is fun

Actually is that the first non-ballad fake-out we’ve had? I think so

More unnamed male rapper

This bass synth though is neat

Back to the horns I guess, the percussion in this section is great

7/10, could’ve done more in the verses

Good-Bye

Slow jam time

More unnamed dude, except this time he’s just muttering under his breath like he thinks this is Haru Haru

Haru Haru is the only acceptable emo muttering under your breath in music

I’m typing about Haru Haru because this song is slow and boring

Oh he does get proper rap lines, whoever he is

Dude his voice is low, and quiet, and mixed low too, I can hardly hear him

That kinda worked though

This guitar solo is fun at least

6/10 for the rap and the guitar

Reason Why I’m Perfect

Well that’s an egotistical title

More slow jam

Random rap break wtf

Now that’s a proper Nmixx change up

Oh also, random unnamed rapper reappears

This song is alright but it does basically nothing for me

5/10

Friend

I think we’re due a fun song

Oh no I’m scared by this intro

Well either this is a ballad or it’s a slow jam and I’m worried

Dude why do they always use the exact same snare sample?

Can I just skip this? Is that allowed?

5/10

Rock’n Country

Well I guess this is that fun song I wanted

Yep, fun beat

Lots of vocal samples in the background – not just in this song but the other fast ones too

Did I say fun beat? I think I should’ve said “gets old really fast” beat haha

Lol the lalala’s and the ha’s are funny

There’s no rock anywhere in this song

More unnamed male rapper

This bass is killing me

The growl lol

6/10, it was fun but REally annoying

After Today

This intro feels like some fantasy shit

But like, early 2000’s computer graphics fantasy game

More unnamed male rapper

Honestly this song makes me kind of uncomfortable

I feel like I’m supposed to like this song but

5/10

Thy Fragrance

Oh no

Fake ending, and then “come along baby”

Seriously who is the unnamed rapper guy

Wikipedia says it’s Eric Mun, but who does the other songs?

6/10 purely for the vocal flexing lol

[letterstotheflre]

um this is a bit embarrasing but does anyone have any nsfw audio recs with a voice similar to professor cal??

[daenqyu]

— they walk in on their crush changing

includes: bakugou, kirishima, todoroki, midoriya, and tamaki

warnings: kinda suggestive?? swearing  

a/n: i saw multiple tiktoks about this and wanted to write something about it sooo yeah. some of them are a bit longer than others because i got carried away oops. hope you guys like it !!

( gif isn’t mine !! credits go to @orbital-audio )

bakugou katsuki:

listen, i feel like bakugou would act like he doesn’t care at all

but he’s definitely blushing and can’t look at you straight in the eye 

he just wanted to let you know that since kaminari and mina forced him to help them study, you could come too 

so he made his way to your dorm room while looking at his phone

and he doesn’t even knock so you’re quite startled

although you don’t blame him because he’s always hanging out in your room and vice versa

“hey we’re gonna have a study session later tonight, in case you wanna come” his eyes are glued to his phone as he talks, but you still feel embarrassed that he’s in the same room as you while you’re changing 

after a few seconds go by with no response from you, he finally looks up from the device

“i’m talking to you-” the breath gets knocked out of him when he sees you’re in the middle of trying on different outfits 

and apparently you were about to try a new one because you’re just in your freaking underwear 

bakugou may be a lot of things, but he is not a pervert 

so he’s quick to turn around to face the door, his eyes tightly shut even tho he can’t see anything as it is since you’re behind him

“you dumbass, don’t you know how to lock a fucking door?! is not that hard for fuck’s sake” 

you almost want to laugh at the blonde’s state

you’ve never seen him like this before so you might as well tease him about it

“didn't your parents teach you it's impolite to enter a room without knocking first?”

oh he can hear the smirk on your face and he wants nothing more than to go up to you and wipe it off himself 

but he knows you’re still in your underwear 

and while it’s true he’s a gentleman, he’s also a man

seeing his crush in her underwear will most definitely get a reaction out of him

he curls his hands into fists by his side, jaw clenching because he knows you’re probably enjoying this

“just shut up and get dressed”

“is my room, i can stay like this if i want”

“put. something. on”

his tone annoys you

who the hell is he to tell you what to do?

“and what if i don’t want to?”

you’re just buffing of course, you’ve already put on one of bakugou’s shirt that you stole from him a week ago

his patience is running out 

and he’s mad at himself because fuck, why does he have to like you so much?

if it was any other girl he couldn’t have cared less and would’ve just walked out

but it’s you, his crush

you’re so different from everyone else and it makes his blood boil because feelings are stupid and he should be focusing on becoming the number one hero, not some silly high school crush

“okay i'm dressed”

a sigh of relief escapes his lips as he turns around, but it doesn’t take long before his eyes are wide open as he takes in your figure

oh

you’re wearing his shirt

it ends just above your mid thigh and it falls around your figure loosely, obviously too big for you

bakugou can feel butterflies in his stomach at the sight 

why are you so pretty? 

“what was that you were saying when you walked in?”

you’re so calm and collected, walking around with only his shirt on 

normally he hates when people wear his clothes, but it looks so good on you he can’t even bring himself to be annoyed

“we’re having a study session tonight,” his voice is low and he fixes his gaze on the wall behind you. “and you can come too, if you want to that is”

“wait that’s a great idea, i’ve been falling behind on english recently”

he nods and you frown at his actions 

sure bakugou can be quiet, when he’s not mad, but he looks  rather…shy?

you smirk once again, knowing what this is all about

“don’t tell me the bakugou katsuki has never seen a girl naked before?”

“the fuck are you talking about?”

“well is either that or you like me because why else would you be so red right now?”

he groans when you say that

anyways he uhhh got tired of you not getting all the hints he’s been dropping and just straight up corners you against the wall

your heart is about to burst out of your chest at the close proximity and the feeling only intensifies when he smirks

he leans down, lips merely inches away from your own

“seeing as you’re not pushing me away right now, i say you like me too, dumbass”

well he’s not wrong soooo

you end up kissing after that✨

( gif isn’t mine !! credits go to its rightful owner )

kirishima eijirou:

oh boy, this poor baby

he would be the type to apologize around 100 times and even when you told him it was fine and that you didn’t care, he would still feel guilty

ok so what happened was you were getting ready for your date with kirishima

because yes, he finally asked you out and you couldn’t be happier with life at the moment

and he wanted to know how much longer you were gonna take since he was already done

but you wouldn’t answer his texts

spoiler alert: you were just showering but he was too impatient and also he just wanted to see you again hehe he’s so cute

anyways,,

he makes his way to your room and knocks on the door 

it’s more of like a warning because he doesn’t even wait for a response, he just barges in

you had gotten out of the shower like 3 minutes ago and were in the process of drying your hair in the middle of the room, your back facing kirishima 

“hey y/n how much longer do you think- shit!”

his voice scares you, but you don’t move because you know it’ll be worse if you do 

so you stay frozen in your place

kirishima notices the droplets of water falling from your hair and down your spine before slowly falling down the curves of your-

he flushes completely, his face now matching his dyed hair perfectly, and he turns around with both of his hands covering his eyes

“i’m so so so sorry! that was so unmanly of me. i should’ve just waited until you texted me, but i missed you and wanted to see you so i came over and didn’t wait for an answer and then i saw you and oh god you’re naked and-”

“kirishima,”

he shuts up when he hears your soft voice calling his name

“yeah?”

“calm down”

after that he just stays quiet, trying to calm the erratic beating of his heart and not let his imagination run wild

you should be the one that’s flustered because your best friend and crush just saw your bare ass

but if anything, kirishima’s the one who feels like he’s about to faint from seeing so much skin

he thinks it’s really unmanly of him to see you naked without your consent so he’s on the brink of an existential crisis

meanwhile, as kirishima rethinks all of his life choices, you finish drying your hair and continue to put on your outfit, knowing kirishima wouldn’t turn around any time soon

he’s still facing away from you even when you’ve finished dressing up

you giggle, thinking about how cute he is before tapping his shoulder 

“you can look now, kiri”

even with your permission, he’s still hesitant about his movements

he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything so that’s why he genuinely doesn’t know what to do

kirishima turns around slowly, eyes now focused on the floor

“i’m really sorry about that, y/n. i didn’t mean to i swear and i’m sorry if i made you uncomfortable but-”

“kiri, i’m not mad at you”

“you’re not?”

“of course not, i know it was an accident”

well thank god because he wouldn’t forgive himself if he made you upset 

“besides, you were eventually gonna see me naked”

it was a joke

supposed to be

but kirishima whips his head your way and his eyes almost pop out of their sockets 

a part of him is shy sure, but the other part wants to run laps after hearing you say that

“well yeah but that’s different…” he scratches the back of his neck nervously and your heart swells for the boy in front of you

he really is so sweet

he just wants you to be completely comfortable around him

how could you not be in love with him? 

“how about we forget this ever happened, i finish getting ready, and then we go on our date? hm?”

he nods eagerly after hearing you say that, if you’re happy then he’s absolutely content 

you smile at him before standing up on your tip toes and leaving a chaste kiss against his cheek

of course he blushes again

he’ll never get tired of your cuteness 

or you in general

but this time he’s more confident when he pulls you to his chest in a tight hug

“the view was really nice by the way”

“kirishima!”

“what? i'm just saying you should be proud”

“you’re so stupid”

“stupidly in love with you that is”

he’s got a dumb smile on his face after he says that

and it only widens when you take his hand in yours to sit him down on your bed 

yup, he’s head over heels for you

( gif isn’t mine !! credits go to its rightful owner )

todoroki shouto:

out of the five of them, he’d DEFINITELY be the most chill about it

sure, he’d still feel embarrassed and what not

but he wouldn’t make such a big deal about it

simply because he doesn’t want to make things awkward between you two

so he decides it’s best if he just keeps acting like he normally would

you texted him to come over so you could watch some movies together 

and he had some homework to do but it’s not like he was gonna pass up on the opportunity of spending quality time with you 

unlike the other first years,

todoroki actually knocks and waits for your response

because he has manners, period.

“come on in!”

you said it was okay to come in

so why the hell are you in the middle of changing shirts?????

he wastes no time in closing his eyes

refusing to keep looking at you when you probably don’t even know he’s watching

“um y/n?”

“yes?”

“what are you doing?”

“i’m changing, isn’t it obvious?” your chuckle makes his cheeks heat up 

was this amusing to you?

because he was seconds away from having a heart attack 

however he doesn’t show it

instead, he just continues to keep his eyes closed while trying to think about literally anything else except your bare skin

key word: trying

because he can’t seem to get the image of your clothed breasts out of his mind and he thinks he’s about to go insane 

he also scolds himself because a gentleman shouldnt do that 

but you don’t seem to care at all and that confuses him so much (???

“why do you have your eyes closed?”

“are you done changing”

“yeah”

when he opens his eyes again you’re sitting down on your bed, laptop placed in front of you as you scroll down on netflix

now fully dressed

he lets out a sigh of relief before clearing his throat and sitting down next to you

and he thinks he’s being slick and smooth

but he’s not

he’s actually almost completely stiff 

and when you subconsciously brush your knee against his, he flinches

you frown at his reaction

“are you okay?”

“yeah, why do you ask?”

“because you’re acting weird”

“am not”

“you are”

the banter goes on for a while until you finally figure it out

the way his eyes occasionally look down on your chest only to quickly look away with a blush on his cheeks it's what gives him away

“wait, are you embarrassed just because you saw my boobs?”

cue todoroki wanting to get the hell out of your room

“i’m not embarrassed” 

“your blush says otherwise, todoroki”

he doesn’t know what to say afterwards so he just sits there with a pout on his pretty lips and his eyebrows furrowed

he’s so shy and cute🥺

“if you want to, you can take your shirt off so we’ll be tied”

your tone is teasing as you continue to scroll on your computer, not really giving much thought to what you said

except you forgot todoroki takes everything quite literally

the grin falls from your lips as soon as you see todoroki, indeed, taking off his shirt 

“w-what are you doing?!”

“you said we need to be tied”

“todoroki, that was a joke!”

the roles have been reversed because now you're the one who’s all flustered and looking away from him

he blinks once, then twice before smiling at you

“now who’s being shy?”

“i- shut up and watch the movie”

( gif isn’t mine !! credits go to its rightful owner )

midoriya izuku:

he would die

not literally duh

but he’d want to disappear right then and there

you know that one scene where hatsume is pressed up against him and he blushes a shit ton and is just like “b-b-boobs”?

well yeah he’s like that

except he can barely talk because of how embarrassed he is 

he’d also, like kirishima, apologize a lot

he literally just feels like he committed a crime

and you’re like “midoriya, it’s not that deep”

but he’s just upset with himself 

you had told him earlier that you needed some help with your homework

and since he’s such a wonderful friend, he didn’t hesitate to tell you that he’d be more than happy to help

so now he’s happily walking to your room because he loves study dates with you

even tho they’re not dates at all

but still

he loves them

especially whenever you get a question right and you just look up at him with big puppy eyes, waiting for him to praise you

and he does

because you deserve it

you work so hard and he admires you for that

ok BAcK to the point,,,

(i’m sorry i just love this man so much, he makes me so soft)

here’s the deal

midoriya knocks on your door right?

but you don’t hear it because you’re blasting music on your speaker while singing your heart out

so he lets himself in

tho he wants to run back out when he sees your naked back is facing him

you’re changing; that’s the first thing he notices 

the second thing he notices is that you’re standing in front of a mirror

and you’re not wearing a bra

he yelps before turning around and you jump because you hadn’t noticed him 

“izuku? what are you-”

“i’m so sorry y/n! i didn’t mean to invade your privacy like this a-and i didn’t know you were changing and so i opened the door and then i saw you and oh god you’re not wearing a shirt which isn’t bad you know, i m-mean i'm not saying you look bad because ha believe me you don’t but-”

“oh my god dude, would you relax?”

you laugh as you finish putting on your hoodie 

he frowns, you’re laughing? in a situation like this?! are you okay???

“again, i’m sorry and it’s okay if you want me to go because it’s weird and i don’t want you to feel uncomfortable because of me so-”

“ok izuku, first of all stop talking,” he quickly shuts his mouth, still facing the closed door so you don’t see his tomato-like cheeks. “second, turn around,” you place your hands on his shoulders to make him look at you and he tenses at the touch, but turns around anyways 

you offer him a kind smile, the one that makes him fall harder for you everyday and that’s enough to ease his nerves a bit

“third, quit freaking out. it’s not like i’m gonna kill you or anything”

“b-but how are you so...calm?”

“uhh because i don’t really care?” 

he doesn’t know why, but his heart hurts a little after hearing you say that

is not like he expects you to actually reciprocate his feelings but,,

he didn’t have an effect on you whatsoever? not even a little bit?

“and besides, it’s you so i don’t mind”

“what do you mean?”

you shrug, smirking at the green haired boy, “well you like me, right?”

he almost stops breathing 

maybe he did for a few seconds

he looks at you, a mix of emotions flashing through his expression 

is he relieved? is he scared? is he happy?

he doesn’t  k n o w

neverthless, he nods shyly, looking away from your captivating gaze

“and i like you so it’s okay”

midoriya.exe has stopped working

someone PLEASE calm this boy down

he’s about to explode from feeling so much happiness 

“you do?!”

“of course” you smile at him one last time, before interlacing your fingers with his and sitting down on the rug next to your bed so you can study 

or maybe you got a little carried away and ended up cuddling all evening while eating ramen

but that’s besides the point

( gif isn’t mine !! credits go to its rightful owner )

tamaki amajiki:

sweet little baby

he faints :D

no but seriously

he does.

are we surprised? 

nope, not at all

he can’t look at you for more than 5 seconds without getting nervous as it is,

but after he saw you half naked?!

yeah no, that’s too much for tamaki

his body shuts down because he cannot handle it

nejire told him to go check up on you because you seemed off at school

which tamaki also noticed because he’s very observant with people (especially you) but he preferred to not say anything 

of course his first response to nejire is straight up: no

he’s too shy 

and he’s scared because what if you get mad at him? or tell him to go away?

he thinks it’s better to give you your space and if you want to talk to him, then he’s more than ready to listen

but nejire wouldn’t shut up about it

then mirio butted in too and they were just whining a lot and he got tired of hearing them talk

now here he is, standing in front of your room with a shaky hand hovering against the wooden door

much like todoroki, he knocks and patiently waits for a response 

which he receives quickly 

“who is it?”

“tamaki”

“ahh tama, let yourself in!”

he blushes at the nickname and finally opens the door

he’s about to go sit on your desk chair or something 

but then he sees you

you’re only in your underwear, struggling to put on a hoodie 

and then you jump to try and get it on

and that makes it worse because you’re wearing a  b r a 

long story short,

he falls to the floor :D

the big ‘thud’ startles you and even more so when you see tamaki’s unconscious body on the floor

“shit, tama are you okay?”

it takes him a good 5 minutes to open his eyes again 

he feels a cold towel pressed up against his forehead and he frowns at the feeling

when he turns his head around, he notices that he’s laying down on your bed

but you're nowhere to be seen 

“thank god you’re awake” 

your voice comes from behind him and that’s when he realizes he’s not only laying down on your bed, but also on your lap

“you really worried me!”

cue him blushing like there’s no tomorrow and stuttering 

“s-sorry. i was just s-surprised to see you c-changing and i’m sorry i didn’t tell you i was coming b-beforehand”

you shake your head, “that’s okay tama, i’m not mad at you”

he just nods because he’s afraid he’ll say something dumb if he talks

you brush your fingers through his indigo hair and he swears he can feel himself falling more in love with you in that precise moment 

you smile down at him

“what did you come here for anyway? not that i mind, but you know”

“nejire told me y-you seemed down today s-so i came to check up on you”

butterflies flutter in your stomach at his sweet words

“aww you’re so sweet, but i’m okay. i was just feeling sad”

he sits up to look at you better and he doesn’t miss the way you pout when his hair is no longer in between your fingers 

which makes his heart speed up 

“are you okay?”

his question is so genuine and he seems so concerned, it makes you want to keep him in your pocket forever

“i am now” 

he smiles at your response, happy that you feel better

“i’m glad”

“now come here, i wanna play with your hair”

and who is he to deny such request?

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS DAYLIGHT  Vol.5 Sakamaki Kanato [TRACK 3]

Original title: 僕の名前を呼んで

Source: Diabolik Lovers Daylight Vol. 5 Sakamaki Kanato

Audio: Here (Huge thank you to @filthyhelplessworld​ for providing the audio!)

Seiyuu: Kaji Yuki

Translator’s note: Now this is the angst I’ve been waiting for! I have to give Kaji Yuki huge props because he really had to rely on his entire voice range for this CD, haha. I’m not a Kanato stan by any means, but I did feel somewhat bad for him, despite his selfish behavior from earlier. You can really tell he was struggling all along but he doesn’t know how to convey his feelings so he just defaults to throwing anger tantrums instead. 

Track 1 ll Track 2 ll Track 3 ll Track 4 ll Track 5 + Epilogue

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Track 3: Say My Name

“Haah...School is such a chore. Perhaps I should just burn the whole building to the ground? ...I suppose I’ll just kill some time at the infirmary for no…”

*Rattle*

[00:20] “...!? ...You. ...Hah. I figured you were dead already since I hadn’t seen you in a while. You’ve actually been attending school, it seems. So, are you resting up here? I will excuse myself then. I came here hoping to get some alone time, but since someone is here, that plan has been completely ruined.”

He turns around.

“...Especially since it’s you. ...Well then.”

You stop him.

“Haah...What’s the matter?”

You ask if he’s feeling unwell.

[01:04] “Now why would that matter? It’s none of your business, is it? Please stop meddling with my affairs, it’s highly bothersome.”

You ask if he needs to suck your blood.

“Hahaha…! You would still be willing to offer me your blood after everything?”

You nod.

[01:27] “...While that is rather noble of you, don’t you think that perhaps you’re thinking a little too highly of yourself? If I’m thirsty, I will simply make my way to town. There are plenty of people who can take your role after all. ...Aren’t you the one who said that? ーー Either way, you do not need to worry about me.”

You frown.

“Is that all you had to say? Well then, goodbye.”

Kanato leaves.

[02:06] ( I thought you would return to my side if I continued to push you away like this. Crying, weeping, clinging to my legs. ...All while I remained completely ignorant to just how much your heart was aching. I’m sure that by this point...You had already made your resolve, had you not? ) 

*TIMESKIP*

[02:50] “The hours of boredom are finally over. Now to head straight home. ...Hm? That back side...It’s her, isn’t it? Hmph. I can tell straight away even when she has her head hanging down. ...Hm. Well, I suppose I shall give her a small chance. I can’t just give her the cold shoulder after all. (1)”

He approaches you.

“Good evening. (2).”

You flinch.

[03:26] “Hah. Why so surprised? Is it strange for me to approach you? That being said, I don’t exactly need anything from you. ...So, you were hunched forward quite a bit while walking, what’s the matter? Did something sad happen? ...Hah. If you insist, I would not mind hearing your story. I’m sure it will help combat my boredom. ...So, what happened?”

You brush him off.

“...! ...I-If you’re alright, I suppose that’s fine too. Heeh…”

You tell him you will head home now. 

[04:17] “Yes, please be my guest and be on your merry way. By yourself.”

You walk away.

“Kuh…! ...Hey, wait!”

You come to a halt.

“The infirmary is my resting place, so you better stay away from it in the future!”

You nod.

“Hah...Well get going then! ...What’s the matter?”

You ask if he will be okay by himself.

[05:00] “More than okay. If anything, it feels like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders! Please don’t treat me like a child.”

You smile.

“...’I’m glad’ you say? ...Excuse me!?”

You turn around and walk away.

“Kuh…!!”

*TIMESKIP*

*Tick・tock・tick・tock*

[05:42] “...Honestly, what is her problem!? I was so kind as to strike up a conversation with her too…! ...Oh well, I wouldn’t mind if things remain this way either, of course. Even if she were gone, I’d be just…!”

*TIMESKIP*

*Tick・tock・tick・tock*

“Tsk...Aah, god!!”

*THUD*

[06:13] “Haah, haah...I have no idea where you are or what you are up to right now. You might be having your blood sucked by one of my other brothers for all I know. When I consider that possibility...I’m overcome by intense feelings of anger and despair. Haah...I...I don’t want this...Why won’t things just go my way!? Iーー To me, you’re so veryーー...! (3)”

*TIMESKIP*

*Tick・tock・tick・tock*

“Haah...Haah...Haah…”

*Tick・tock・tick・tock*

[07:19] “ーーUgh! Guess I have no other choice! At this rate, my rage will never be quelled. While I don’t like having to do this, I will bend. It’s frustrating, but...You’re all I have…”

He opens his drawer and pulls out a piece of paper.

*Flip*

*Scribble scribble*

*TIMESKIP*

You are standing out on the balcony.

*Knock*

[08:07] “...Are you still awake?”

You squeak.

“No need to be so surprised. I do come and visit you from time to time, no? Either way, I’m coming in.”

He enters your room.

[08:25] “Haah...I’m surprised to see you’re out on the balcony this late at night. Were you hoping to jump to your death, perhaps? ...That would only cause extra trouble, so please refrain from doing so. Haah...The wind feels chilly. I can’t believe you would come to such a cold place when you’re already feeling unwell. Are you an idiot?”

You remain quiet.

[09:07] “...Why not say something? Like you could ask me what I’m here for? Or say you’re happy to see me!? I’m sure you’ve got plenty to say!”

You start coughing.

“Haah...There you go coughing. That’s why I warned you. You really are hopeless. ...Without me, at least. ...Listen...I didn’t come to say this or anything...Ugh!”

*Flip*

[09:44] “This. Accept it already.”

You tilt your head to the side.

“It’s an invitation to a tea party. ...For just us two.”

[10:01] “Why, you ask…!? Do I have to spell it out for you!? Consider it my way of telling you that you’re once again allowed in my presence. You will obviously attend, no? I was so kind to invite you after all. Not to mention, this might be your once-in-a-lifetime chance to make things good between us.”

You hesitate.

“...What are you doing? Hurry up and accept the invitation! Otherwise I can’t return to my room! I want to rest already! It’s almost morning after all. ...Here!”

*Flip*

You stand there dazed.

[10:51] “...Do you not want it? ...But why!? I’m trying my absolute hardest to compromise! ...Are you perhaps okay with things staying the way they are right now? ...WHY WON’T YOU SAY ANYTHING!? For one, you’re the one who caused this whole ordeal in the first place! I don’t know what your intention was, but you pestered me by going on about ‘dying’ and such!

...In reality, you should be the one apologizing to me. Begging for my mercy. Do you have any idea how I felt coming heーー”

*Rustle* 

[11:45] “...!? Hey…? Are you listening? You’ve been acting somewhat off this whole time. You seem awfully pale too...Is something the matter?”

You collapse.

*Thud*

“...!? H-Hey! Are you okay!? HEY!”

Kanato touches your skin.

“Cold as ice…!? Why, all of a sudden…!? How come…!?”

*Cling*

“This bottle...Don’t tell me…”

*Sniff*

[12:24] “Poison…? Did you drink this? Then...You were actually trying to die? But why…? …! Because I told you...you could be easily replaced?”

*Rustle*

“You can’t! Open your eyes!”

*Rustle*

[12:54] “Hang in there! I was obviously lying when I said that! Why don’t you understand!? I-I mean...To me, you’re just soーー!”

You tell him he wouldn’t believe you.

“No! You’re wrong…!! When you said you were dying, I didn’t actually disbelieve you. I justーー!”

You admit to how sad it made you.

[13:16] “Uu…It was never my intention to make you suffer either…! I just…Uu…Hic…I can’t bear the thought of it…Of a world without you…I didn’t want to believe that day would come…! That’s why I turned a blind eye to itーー! Yet…Why…Why did it turn out like this…? Hic…Say?”

*Rustle*

“Open your eyes…Wake up! …Wake up, please…!!”

*Rustle*

[14:00] “I mean…This just can’t be…No...Who…Who gave you permission to do this!?”

You have passed out.

“…Open your eyes…and say my name…Like you always would…Please! ...Uu...No...You won’t let get away with this! I won’t let this happen!! ...UWAAAAAAAAH!!!”

ーー TO BE CONTINUED ーー

Translation notes

(1) Kanato refers to the ‘carrot and stick’ method here, in which punishment and reward are alternated. 

(2) ごきげんよう is a very snobbish/high class way to greet someone. You won’t actually hear it much in modern day Japan, but some characters in anime say it 

(3) His sentence is cut off, but it’s heavily implied he wants to say something along the lines of ‘but you mean so much to me’ or ‘I love you so much’.

[thesolferino]

⤷ note: apologies for losing your request, anon, but thank you for requesting! this is my first time writing a full fic in second person, so bear with me, and i hope this is what you were looking for <3

The Great American Bake Off

pairing: corpse husband x gn!reader

word count: 3.6k

genre: fluff

summary: you’ve been jealous of rae and her closeness with your boyfriend since the dawn of time, but things change and friendships are made once she comes over for one hell of a cooking video.

Corpse, among many other things, was a man many wished to have.

It’s the truth; even if he didn’t have a YouTube channel through which millions kept up with everything from horror stories to Among Us gameplays, people would still turn heads and whisper whenever he spoke - that attention more than multiplied when he started blowing up and his social media presence grew.

With growth come numbers, and there are always people behind said numbers. Through them, Corpse makes wonderful friends - through them, you had met him, too. All the way back, during his horror narration days, you had grown to like him - really, who wouldn’t?

A DM you once sent after a few drinks, when you claimed to your friends you’d get the “deep-voiced man of your dreams” you often talked about and they, in turn, challenged you to message him, was nothing short of a joke and the idea of him responding was merely a pipe dream. What you hadn’t expected, however, was a response, which wrecked your brain at noon the next day, where your head throbbed with embarrassment, guilt, pride, happiness, a melt of hatred and gratefulness for your friends, panic and the remains of alcohol that tugged at every part of your skull.

It had turned out to be more than a great idea, though, because for the next few weeks you were constantly talking. You learned so much more than he let on in videos, and during late night calls you found out everything from his favorite clothing brand to his favorite color to his thoughts about his own mortality and then back to his favorite cereal. Audio calls and short voice messages turned into hours long FaceTimes that led you from friends to something more. And after a year or so of dating, you packed your bags and made it to sunny San Diego, ready to lay in his arms and sweat bullets.

Safe to say Corpse’s social media presence had its good sides. However, with all good things come bad things too, and you weren’t sure if the bad things were bad at all or you were simply too jealous.

Corpse made wonderful friends thanks to his YouTube channel. He met people he could confide in, meet, people he could talk to about his worst problems, people who would listen - he met people he could have fun with, with who he could forget all about the real world and his own issues, and simply laugh his heart away, play games until the late hours of the night.

If he had to name his closest ones, they would have to be Dave, Loey, maybe Mykie, possibly Jack, and Rae. And that is exactly where the root of the problem stood.

Rae is beautiful, and everyone who denies it must be either dumb or blind. She’s drop dead gorgeous, and funny, and kind, and smart, in a way that made you want to rip your hair out. You wanted to hate her so bad, because the jealousy ate away at you like a damn disease, but you couldn’t, because she was perfect Rae, and as much as you hated the fact she seemed to be perfect inside out, you just couldn’t hate her as her. It was impossible, you concluded.

You convinced yourself you weren’t jealous every time you heard him yelling or laughing at her from his office room - or at least you attempted to do so. Your lunch would turn sour and end up forgotten because you’d be way too focused on listening in on what he was doing and trying to make out what she was saying to even eat at the same pace you previously were. Jealousy ate away at you, no matter if you admitted it to yourself or not.

It didn’t go unnoticed by Corpse, of course. On one late night when you couldn’t sleep and neither could he, as per usual, you turned on a random comedy that you half-heartedly paid attention to, his fingers combing through the knots in your hair peacefully and the slow pace of the movie lulling you to sleep slowly. That is, before his phone rang and lit the mostly dark room. You managed to sneak a glance at the notification before he had, and the familiar bitterness seeped between your ribs as always upon seeing the name displayed at the top of the message, more than awake now.

You visibly stiffened when he laughed at the message and typed something back, shifting your head in his lap as some subconscious attempt at getting him to pay attention to you instead. He put his phone down and you huffed, eyes locked on the TV screen as you pretended to be extremely absorbed in the movie even though you weren’t quite sure of the difference between the protagonist and antagonist anymore. His hands didn’t return to your hair, and that somehow made you even more annoyed.

“What’s up?” Corpse quietly spoke up, barely over the volume over the already quiet movie.

“Nothing.” You said, quicker than you wanted to, and you bit your tongue in cringe when you realised it was an awful lie. Corpse seemed to think the same.

“That’s bullshit. Seriously, what’s wrong?” He asked, and was met with pure silence. In reality, you were hoping he’d simply never realise you were somewhat jealous, because you knew you were being stupid and unreasonable, but you couldn’t help wanting him all to yourself. Admitting it out loud made it so much more real, and so much more embarrassing that you would rather bury yourself alive than admit to being jealous of Rae, of all people.

After a few seconds of silence, save the laughter of characters on screen, he spoke again.

“Are you jealous?” The hint of a teasing tone in his voice made you want to rip your hair out of your skull. Was it really that damn hard to believe that yes, you were jealous of an extremely close friend of his? Was it a crime?

The clenching of your jaw seemed to give Corpse enough of a response, and his hands returned to running themselves through your hair as he giggled to himself. 

“What’s so damn funny?” You borderline spat, causing his movements to halt for a second before continuing with even louder laughter.

“I don’t know, just the idea of you being jealous of Rae is so funny. I’ve noticed the way you roll your eyes whenever I text her in front of you. You’re not exactly sneaky, you know?” His words made blood rush straight to your face, cheeks heating up in embarrassment. How long has he known this for?

“Sorry. I don’t…” you exhaled and attempted to smile. “I don’t know what’s up with me. I’m so jealous nowadays. I don’t even know why.”

“There’s enough of me to share with everyone, no worries baby.” he replied, teasing tone still yet to dissipate as you slap his knee in mock offense and he starts wheezing.

“Absolutely not! Fucking excuse you, I’m not sharing with anyone!” you gaped at him as he kept laughing.

That was the end of it - or at least Corpse thought so. Needless to say, he was wrong.

Your mood would instantly turn sour whenever he’d laugh at one of her messages, and you attempted to push down every eye roll whenever he’d sit on his phone, between your legs, back turned to you so you could see everything, and open Rae’s DMs again. Sometimes you managed, sometimes you couldn’t help it, but you did your best to do it whenever he wasn’t looking. Because you truly knew you were being unreasonable, especially whenever you have to relay situations like how he had to postpone a date one time because Rae asked him to play Rust for a bit longer and you almost ripped all your hair out of your skull in frustration back to your best friend who just turned Rae and Corpse into the villains in the situation because that’s what best friends are supposed to do.

Not like he was going out of his way to talk to her a concerning amount, they mostly talked in groupchats and on streams and that was only a few times weekly, but it did absolutely nothing to calm the green monster growing stronger in you every day, fed by every laugh she got out of him.

The green monster fucking loved it when Corpse excitedly announced to you that he’s finally meeting his friends for the first time, and by friends meaning Rae, Sykkuno and Karl. You, however… were far from impressed.

He paced around the room in excitement, a mix of obvious anxiety and joy evident on his face, and he fiddled with the strings of his hoodie with shaky hands as he very proudly announced that he would be the second tallest person in the room through a blinding, pearly grin, and seeing him so electrified couldn’t help but make you shut your jealous thoughts up, even if just for a little bit, and mirror his grin back to him.

What did, however, make you as anxious as him was when he announced they’d a) be coming to your shared apartment and b) making a cooking video - it sent you into a panicked mom mode as you dusted every corner of every room and vacuumed everything from the kitchen to the balcony and Corpse did nothing but record you as you anxiously rambled and laugh at you from his place on your bed.

When the dreaded Saturday finally came, and the first person to arrive, Sykkuno, rang your doorbell, you squeezed Corpse’s hand to stop him from nervously toying with his rings and opened the door, and you greeted the man like he was your own brother and not a person you’d seen probably a total of three times through the computer screen and someone who’s seen you maybe two times, from the pictures Corpse sent him, in your best attempt to make both of them more comfortable. It actually kind of worked - turns out Sykkuno is a pretty affectionate guy, too, and a conversation started as soon as he stepped in. Corpse gave you a look when you pulled away from Sykkuno’s half-hug, and you almost laughed out loud at the irony when his phone lit up with a notification from Rae announcing she was almost there at that exact moment.

She had kept true to her word; ten minutes or so later, another ring was heard and you gestured to Corpse to open it this time as you gave Sykkuno his cup of water and resisted any and every urge to roll your eyes or do something otherwise bitchy and stupid. Corpse did as told, and you watched them hug and listened to Rae squeal in excitement through the open door of the living room and decided to plaster a smile on your face for as long as you could muster before you remove yourself from the situation when they start filming.

Unfortunately for you, the first person she locked eyes with was exactly you, and they lit up an even prettier brown (if that was even possible) as she beelined to you and you barely got a greeting out before she engulfed you in a large hug, arms wrapping around your neck as she swayed both of you side to side.

“Oh my God, you must be Y/N! I’ve heard so much about you, it’s so nice to finally meet you!” Rae cheered into your ear before she finally pulled back, before shooting an infectious grin at you that you couldn’t help but return back.

“All good things, I hope.” you chuckled as she moved to greeting Sykkuno, and nodded her head with an enthusiastic giggle of her own. You eyed Corpse for a second who simply leaned against the door frame, watching the whole thing unfold with somewhat of a proud smile on his face, before Rae turned back to you and your attention was on her again.

“Of course! Corpse is very much a simp for you, you know that?” She said and both you and Corpse laughed, especially him, who nodded his head in agreement as she sat back down, still beaming at you.

“Well, I’m happy to hear that.” you respond before turning back to Corpse. “Where’s Karl at?”

“He’ll be here in half an hour or so, he only landed recently.” he said. You nodded and moved to sit on a nearby chair to leave space for the guests on the couch.

Karl ended up arriving in twenty minutes and apprised everyone of the information that “his taxi driver is a psycho that, apparently, doesn’t fear stop signs or the police” before setting up the camera in your kitchen and tried his best to attach lapel mics on everybody (admittedly, it took way longer than it should’ve, but he eventually managed and that counted as a win in his book). You reluctantly agreed to be the judge of the finished product when they’re done cooking, and Karl was there for the purposes of being a cameraman and making jokes off screen so he agreed too, albeit way more enthusiastically than you.

The two of you sat behind the camera as the three of them lined up, Corpse wearing a mask and his signature eyepatch (that he didn’t really need, but those two did their job in preserving his privacy) and introduced what they were doing. Corpse was obviously very anxious, hands fidgeting constantly and shivering like a dog after a bath despite the hoodie he was wearing in 100 degree weather because of the shower of sweat that was now drying on his body, and that was partly why you were there, supportive smiles, encouraging cheers and all.

They were making Mexican ground beef tacos, and despite knowing Corpse can barely make a sandwich without setting at least two dishes on fire, you still cheered him on proudly and repeated he was part Mexican himself roughly 5 times a minute, claiming he was going to kill it.

“Kill it? More like kill one of us- CORPSE watch what you’re doing with that fucking knife! You’re proving my point!” Rae yelled at him as he giggled in delight, watching the woman gape at him in pure horror and Sykkuno watch his movements completely entranced as he played with the knife in his hands.

“You’re just mad that he’s going to make tacos fifty times better than you.” you said to Rae, chewing down on some M&Ms that Karl and you shared (both of you decided on a genius plan - you’re going to eat the whole bag before they’re done with cooking so you can claim you’re full and therefore can’t eat the atrocity that will most likely be the tacos).

“Don’t gas me up like that, Y/N, you are well aware I’m shit at cooking. Expect absolutely nothing from me.” he replied over the sizzling of the meat on the pan, throwing a whole spoonful of chili powder into it, earning loud yelling and scolding from your side and loud laughter from Rae.

“HALF A TEASPOON! Half a teaspoon, how have you not remembered this already?! We’ve made tacos a million times now, oh my God, you’re actually stupid.” you yelled at him, arms flailing in the direction of the seasoning to emphasise your ‘half a teaspoon’ point as Rae doubled over in laughter and Sykkuno looked into the pan with a concerned and somewhat afraid look. Just as he peeked in, the overwhelming smell of chili powder started biting away at his eyes, and he jumped away with a yelp.

“Jesus, Corpse!” he exclaimed, rubbing his eyes with his forearm as the whole room burst into laughter and Corpse suspiciously inspected his beef.

“What were you saying about your ‘Mexican king’, Y/N?” Rae asked, pulling out a few tortillas and putting them on the table. You huffed, grabbing another handful of M&Ms.

“Giving him up to God. He’s the only one who can help, at this point.” you said. She giggled in response and Corpse let out some sort of protesting sound and waved his knife around in complaint. “I don’t know who this man is. He broke into my kitchen and now I’m here.”

“Hey, I pay half of your rent!” he said, and you were about to reply but Rae dropped her meat into a pan full of overheated oil, and a loud hiss and some sort of a scream overtook the room as a cloud of steam shot into the air and she frantically looked around for the wooden spoon so the meat wouldn’t stick to the pan. You simply sat and laughed, eating the candy like it was popcorn and you were watching a shitty cooking show - it wasn’t that far from reality, really.

“Um, I just realised I don’t make many tacos, actually.” she said as she helplessly stirred the meat, turning to you with pleading eyes. “What seasoning even goes into this? Y/N, will you help me? Let’s team up against Corpse!”

You tilted your head in thought, but before you could even speak, Corpse spoke up.

“That’s not fucking fair, that’s-that’s against the rules.” he turned to you. “You won’t betray me, right?”

You laughed at him, adjusting in your seat. “I gave up on you ever since you added, like, 3 kilos of seasoning into the meat for no reason.” then you turned to Rae. “Sure, let’s do it, babe.”

Their loud yelling immediately started mixing, Rae’s cheers contrasting Corpse’s protesting. She stuck her tongue out at him meanwhile Corpse shot her the middle finger, and she turned back to you with a grin.

“Alright, what do I put in?”

Roughly twenty unnecessary and extremely long minutes later, the tacos were done, two each for each of them. Rae’s looked the best - probably because you guided her through the whole thing - next to Sykkuno’s, whose you were genuinely intrigued to try. While Corpse was arguing with Rae, he burned roughly half of his already ruined beef, and Karl made the very nice observation that it looked like a bird shat in a tortilla, which you proclaimed as the highlight of the video.

Since you and Karl claimed you were full, the three of them simply swapped tacos between each other as to be unbiased, and the two of you watched in amused suspense. You were actually quite interested to see what the end results were - you were first anxious and quite annoyed you even had to participate in the first place, because it meant losing your mind from jealousy, watching Corpse and Rae giggle and act all domestic while cooking, but jealousy simply dissipated somewhere half through the video as you watched the three argue if cheddar cheese belonged on tacos or not and Rae laugh at every stupid joke you cracked. Now, you sat, fully immersed as you stared at Sykkuno’s face; the poor guy ended up with the misfortune of having to try Corpse’s taco first.

“Zoom in, zoom in!” you whispered into Karl’s ear who complied and zoomed into Sykkuno’s face. He bit into the taco, chewing for a second before his face twisted in disgust and you began wheezing when he grabbed a tissue and spit it out, immediately grabbing his glass of water. Rae laughed at him as well, mouth full of his one, which she claimed she actually liked but it wasn’t as good as the “Y/NRae-co” as she proudly called it. Corpse silently ate Rae’s taco and refused to give a review on it because he was upset he got defeated, but the fact that he scarfed down the whole thing in a minute or so was enough of a review.

“Oh, come on, it can’t be that bad.” Corpse exclaimed when he saw Sykkuno’s bite in the tissue, grabbing the second taco he made and biting down on it. The whole room burst into laughter when he roughly swallowed, tears obvious in the one eye that showed, because of the overly spicy beef.

“What are you motherfuckers laughing at? It’s not that bad, I stand by tacorpse.”

“Tacorpse is actually genius. The one good thing you came up with during the entirety of this video.” Rae said and Corpse mumbled a fuck you in response.

“Well, I think we can all agree that me and Y/N’s taco was clearly the best.” she said, clasping her hands together.

“I actually think mine was better.” Sykkuno said, to which she pushed his plate out of the frame.

“Nobody asked you anything.”

“Don’t bully Sykkuno, I’ll fucking kick you out.”

“Oh yeah? I’m pretty sure Y/N would kick you out before they’d let you kick me!” Rae said, accusingly pointing her taco in Corpse’s direction.

“Alright, let’s wrap up the video.” Karl laughed behind the camera, and the three of them all turned to properly face it and end the video.

“Thank you all so much for watching, this has been an… interesting video, to say the least. Uh, thank you to Karl for filming this whole disaster, thank you to Corpse,” Rae gestured in his direction, “for lending us his kitchen, thank you to Sykkuno for probably getting us more views on this video, and also a big thank you to Y/N, Corpse’s better half for making this video way more interesting and helping me make probably, like, the best taco I’ve ever made.” she grinned and you shoved a peace sign in front of the camera.

“If you liked this video, check out Sykkuno and Corpse’s channels, they will be linked down below, and please click like and subscribe to support the channel! Again, thank you all for watching, see you later, bye!” she finished, and with that, Karl turned the camera off.

Silence engulfed the room. You sighed.

“Alright, who’s gonna clean this shit up?”

[kimistorm]

Did you just ask me out on live stream? [Yang Jeongin]

Fandom: Stray Kids

Pairing: [Jeongin x GN! Reader]

Warnings: none!

Requested by: @stupendousfriendcalzonehands Thanks for the request! Let me know what you think~

Prompts: "After how many ½ inches does it become a date?” “Did you say you knew how to do this?”

It started as a bet. You and Jeongin couldn’t keep up a weekly podcast for more than 2 months. The way Han phrased it, you could just do it on YouTube and in your dorms, but no, you were fueled by spite and somehow convinced your professor to allow you, Jeongin, and Hyunjin to live stream from the university’s audio studio.

Two months later and you had a small following, so you just continued. Much to Han’s shock.

“On to the final part of the show,” you spoke into your microphone as you scrolled through the outline, “answering your questions!” you let out a snort, “I don’t know why you guys keep asking us for advice. The other day Jeongin tried to joust Seungmin with an icicle.”

“And I won!” your partner declared gleefully with a wide grin.

“Mmm, debatable,” you teased, much to Jeongin’s chagrin, effectively wiping his face of the smile. “He only claims he won because Seungmin’s icicle broke first.”

“Yeah! That’s how it works!”

“But he hit you with it before you broke it!”

Jeongin threw his arms up in frustration, “this isn’t fencing!” From beyond the glass, you saw Hyunjin shaking his head in tired resignation as the two of you deviated from the script yet again and couldn’t help but giggle. “Deal with it Hyunjin,” Jeongin whispered into the mic when he saw what you were giggling at, causing your laughs to escalate. Hyunjin glared at the two of you and Jeongin put his hands up in surrender, “okay okay, actually onto the questions now. Which were chosen by our dear Hyunjin," he mocked with faux sincerity before an evil grin grew on his face, "so if this becomes boring blame him.”

Hyunjin looked like he was going to enter the recording booth and whack the two of you over the head with the rolled-up outline in his hand as his mouth was open in a muffled yell.

“Before Hyunjin takes us off the air, let’s answer some of your questions!” for the third time you tried to continue with what you were supposed to be doing. “This one’s from John. Hey (y/n) and Jeongin! There’s someone who I really like and I want to ask them out on a date. We’ve been getting dinner together, but I don’t think either of us really classify it as a date. It’s mostly been under the pretense of ‘I’m starving, you’re here, let’s go.’ How can I make that leap into asking them on a date versus a friendly get-together? Thanks for the help!” there was a pause of silence as the two of you tried to think of a response, “no offense John, but you’re asking the wrong people. I’ve never been on a date,” you side-eyed Hyunjin for him letting this question pass, “and Jeongin-”

“I’ve been in the same position.”

“What?” you shrieked and the three of you winced as you heard your loud voice through your headphones.

“Warning for headphone users.” Your dark-haired friend mumbled under his breath and took off his headphones to rub at his ear.

“Hold up, when was this?” you looked at Jeongin in bewilderment. The two of you were best friends, and this was a new development for you. You had never heard of Jeongin crushing after someone. Granted, you had only known each other for about 3 years, since the two of you started university, but with the number of late-night ramblings and how often the two of you are together, it could’ve come up.

Jeongin merely shrugged. “I totally understand you, John, it’s difficult, but here’s what I did.” You nodded your head to allow Jeongin to continue, seeing as you had no way to help. “It’s hard to tell from your letter, but how close are the two of you? I got closer and closer to the person who I liked. It developed from ‘hey you’re in the same class as me,’ to something more. It became late-night shenanigans, staying up late talking about anything and everything, watching movies, and of course, doing homework together. Though, to be real, we suck at doing homework when we’re together.” He added with a laugh.

There was a pleasant smile on his face as he reminisced this person, he looked genuinely at peace, and it surprised you. Whoever this person was, they made a big impact on Jeongin’s life. It was strange that you never heard of this person, besides, Jeongin seemed to have had some closure with this person. Did it end badly? Is that why you never knew of this enigma? But he looked so happy? It kind of hurt. This person was so pivotal in his life and yet he hid it all from you. Maybe you weren’t as close as you thought. “Half inch by half inch, we became closer.” There was a definitive look on his face as he gave a nod, seemingly happy with his answer.

You, on the other hand, were a little more unconvinced. That couldn’t be the end of the story. Maybe you were a little more miffed because this was news to you, or maybe the reporter in you was finally coming out and wanting to know the conclusion. Either way, there was a bit of an edge to your voice as you asked, “okay, so after how many ½ inches does it become a date?” you turned the conversation back to John’s question, “John seems to already be friends, he just wants to take this person on a date.”

Jeongin let out a scoff and rolled his eyes at you, “it’s not linear.”

There was a pause and when it seemed like Jeongin wasn’t going to speak up again, you continued your dubious proddings, “did you say you knew how to do this?” there was an offended shout from Jeongin and he kicked you from under the table to elicit a startled yelp from you.

“I hope none of our listeners are using headphones.” Jeongin shook his head in empathy, “because my ears burn.”

“You’re the one who kicked me!”

Jeongin childishly stuck his tongue out at you, “things will work out John. I’m sure the more you get to know them the more things will fall into place.” He reassured, though you weren’t feeling reassured, and you figured John probably wasn’t either.

“Did you ever ask your person out on a date?” you asked, still wanting to get closure for your story, seeing as Jeongin wasn’t keen on providing it.

His face reddened and you resisted the urge to crow teasingly at him, “not yet.” He mumbled into the mic, but it was loud enough for you to hear with your headphones.

You leaned back in your chair to get away from the mic and let out a screech, “you don’t know what you’re talking about either!”

“You were just going to write off John’s letter! I couldn’t let you do that.” He protested with his face still red and his gaze averted.

“Ask them out John!” you took matters into your hands seeing as Jeongin was clumsier with love than you were. Hyunjin sure picked the wrong question this time. “There’s no time like the present. Don’t twist one of your normal dinners into a date, specifically plan it. Ask them if they want to go on a date at some other time than what the two of you normally do. The worst that could happen is they say no.”

“That’s mortifying! I could never do that!” the aghast look on Jeongin’s face did little to make you feel guilty.

“That’s why you never asked out your person on a date.” The hurt look that fell on his face did though. “Oh no, I’m sorry.” The chaotic atmosphere that filled the recording booth stilled and you went over to hug your friend, “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“No, you’re right.” He continued in a quiet voice, “I guess I got too scared to do anything, so I decided things were perfectly all right the way they were, even if I wish it was different.”

You smoothed his hair down absentmindedly from your awkward standing position and his sitting position, “relationships are scary. I think you, and John, are valid to be scared.”

“But you’re also right, there’s no time like the present.”

You let out a quiet laugh, “and in the end, neither of us was able to help John.”

“Maybe this will,” you pulled away from Jeongin in confusion so you could look at his face. There was a nervous look settled on his face and he refused to look anywhere close to you, “do you want to go on a date later?”

Your jaw probably dropped comically as you looked at him in bewilderment, “wait-are you-did you-?” did he ask what you think he did? Did he just ask you out? On-air? Was that buzzing in your ear from your headphones? Was this a setup from Hyunjin? Was Jeongin John? Somehow, even as your mind was racing a hundred miles a minute, the terrified look on Jeongin’s face was able to clear through the mess and register in your mind. You took a deep breath to stop your word vomit, “yeah.” You smiled, “let’s go on a date. Maybe a dinner date?”

The terrified look immediately washed away and was replaced with a relieved look, “that sounds great.”

Hyunjin’s yelling was so loud that the two of you could faintly hear him screaming, “finally!”

Masterlist

Context bonus: "After how many ½ inches does it become a date?” One of my female friends was trying to describe to one of my male friends dating, but none of us know how to date.

[nat-20s]

 Part 8 of the wonderful! Au: the boys answer some questions! Up to you to decide if they actually clarify anything!

(also on AO3)

~*~

Martin: Hey everyone! I know what some of you are thinking right now: it's not Tuesday, why is this episode in my feed? I know significantly more of you are thinking: I don't consistently keep up with podcast releases, how much free time do you think I have, buddy? To answer your queries: this is a bonus episode! We're answering listener questions to clear the air and/or have fun. Also, I don't know, around 20 to 40 minutes a week, as that is the average amount of time per episode? Maybe during your commute? My husband's omnipotence has been gone for five years, we just have to guess at that sort of thing now.

Jon: For legal reasons, that last statement was a joke. In fact, to cover all of our bases, we do not guarantee that any of our responses are genuine.

Martin: Just because we say we'll answer things doesn't mean we'll answer truthfully. Though, honestly, I think we might make it more enjoyable if we do tell the truth. Like, I don't necessarily have a fun lie prepared for our first question from konspiracyking97: "What's their fuckin deal anyway?"

Jon: Is this referring to the oblique references  we've made about being from a parallel reality and only ending up here as a consequence of ending one apocalypse and potentially starting another or the general premise of the show?

Martin: Oh, it's gotta be general premise, yeah?

Jon: In that case, I'm Jon, the other voice you're hearing is Martin, we're married, and we talk about things that are..nice? Good? Usually generally but occasionally rather specifically pleasant.

Martin: That pretty much covers it. It's not a complicated show. Uhh, next question comes from Shane: are either or both of you aliens? Nope!

Jon: Well..

Martin: No. We are 100% human people from Earth, we are under no definition extraterrestrial.

Jon: Eh..

Martin: Okay, first off, I know the tone of that 'eh' and "not fully human" is not synonymous with alien, so even if 100% is being a bit generous, we're still from the same planet as our listeners.

Jon:..

Jon: But. We sort of aren't though. Technically speaking.

Martin: No no no no no. I don't care if it's parallel, Earth is Earth is Earth, regardless of whatever nonsense metaphysics might be occurring.

Jon: So what you're saying is that if you got sucked through a portal and landed on an Earth where dinosaurs were still the predominant species, you wouldn't consider yourself to be an alien?

Martin: Nope!

Jon: I'm certain that they would consider you an alien. All of their mammals are probably shrew sized.

Martin: Sounds like a them problem.

Jon: Sounds like a-?! You know what, no, this will be an off the record debate, for now, I suppose I concede that the two Earths and our physiologies are similar enough that we might, maybe, not count as aliens.

Martin: Thank you. Anyway, our next question is from anonymous, and asks, "Is all of this an ARG?"

Jon: A whomst?

Martin: Alternate reality game. It's a method of storytelling that's interactive with audience, and usually has, I dunno, a certain suspension of disbelief to it where it pretends to be something actually happening in the real world until a dramatic reveal. A lot times it was used as a marketing gimmick, but others have done it just for fun. I can show you some examples after the show?

Jon: So it's in essence a more involved creepypasta?

Martin, delighted: Aw, babe, I'm never going to have a handle on what pop culture you are and aren't aware of, huh?

Jon: We were born within a year of each other, and I've told you that I was a deeply morbid teenager, you should probably be able to intuit some of things, love.

Martin: This coming from a man who has yet to see "It's a Wonderful Life", but has seen every film in the "Banjo Cannibals" franchise, including the Easter special. Jesus doesn't exist in the Banjo Cannibals universe, why does it have an Easter special?

Jon: The movies are rather shoddily translated from Russian, so I'm fairly certain the Easter component of that special was invented wholesale in the English version.

Martin: You say that like it answers more questions than it raises.

Jon: Yes, because it does. Oh, and to answer anonymous's question, no, this isn't an ARG. From my understanding of it, if it were, it'd be a poorly constructed one, as there's no real game element to any of this.

Martin: Hmm. Well, sometimes the game component is just trying to figure out what's going on with the story, or if there's any deeper content, and people are definitely doing that with this show.

Jon: That's not by design though. It's more a side effect of us having poor brain to mouth filters, I'd say.

Martin: Harsh, but fair. Oh, this next one is from Zac, no K, who asks, "Are you two actually even married?"

Jon, flat: We are, but it's under false names because this whole thing is an elaborate insurance scam.

Jon, incredulous: Yes, obviously, we're married. What did you hear in this podcast that would make you wonder otherwise, and how do we rectify it?

Martin: Clearly we need to up our quota for how "disgustingly in love" and "horrifically sappy" we are per episode. Which segues nicely into the next question from Gwen, "What's your favourite wonderful thing you've brought so far?" My answer: my husband. He's kind of my favourite in most things, you know?

Jon: Boooooo

Martin: Why, what's your favourite thing?

[Jon reluctantly sighs]

Jon, indulgent: being married.

Martin: A: serves you right for trying to pretend you're the less horrifically sappy and romantic one even though earlier today someone put a love note in the lunch they packed for me-

Jon:- Lies and slander! I have never, in my life, done that, even once.

Martin: Oh, sure, not even once. And you definitely don't reserve the lilac sticky notes specifically for my lunches because you know I like the colour. 

Jon: I..I don't.. you're rather ruining my image here.

[Martin snorts]

Martin: Can't have the audience think that you are, on occasion, an incredibly doting husband-

Jon: -A title I would argue we both share-

Martin: - which is obviously why, even with it being your favourite thing you've brought, being married to me is just a small wonder-

Jon, audibly rolling his eyes: As I already explained-

[A Pause}

Jon: Actually, you're right-

Martin: Wait-

Jon:- I really should have brought it as a larger wonder-

Martin: Wait-

Jon: though I should warn you, I think I'd have far too much material for just one little segment-

Martin: No no no no no-

Jon:- In fact, I think I might have too much material for just one little episode-

Martin: Joo-oon-

Jon: I might have to do a whole series! Where would I even start? I mean I could talk about how every day I get to watch the early morning sun highlight your curls when I get up first, or hear you quietly humming and shuffling around the kitchen when you do, or I could talk about how the lunch notes only started in the first place as retaliation to the notes you would leave on the mirror for me to find, or how every time I get to see you at ease in a way that you aren't with anyone else, it takes my breath away, or I could talk about how cute I find the lines between your eyebrows that you only get when you're thinking something petty, but you know it's petty so you don't want to say anything-

Martin: Okay, okay, Christ, I give !up I surrender, and will cease my teasing on this particular topic.

Jon, probably making the :3 face: You don't have to stop. I mean, I could also discuss how very, very attractive I find your voice when it takes on a teasi-mmph!

[There's a pleased hum, then a pause.]

[The audio quality is slightly changed, as if the recording has been stopped and then started later]

Martin, giddy: Uh, heh, anyway, Eric asked what the least favourite thing we've brought was, and because of Jon's attempt to embarrass me live-

Jon, overlapping: It's definitely not live-

Martin:- on air, I'm gonna say it's my husband.

[Jon scoffs]

Jon : If the past few minutes are any sort of indication, I'm going to go ahead and saying that you are lying.

Martin, sighing contentedly: Maybe a bit, but how was I supposed to resist when your indigance gives you that adorable little nose scrunch? In reality, my least favourite thing was probably, um, mini golf? Which, I still don't think is inherently bad, definitely superior to regular golf, but when it's the only thing a next door two year old wants to do with you, the charm begins to wear off a bit.

Jon: Wow. A rather scathing review of a toddler.

Martin: Not so much a scathing review of a toddler as it's a scathing review of minigolf's inability to keep its appeal after the third time in the same week.

Jon: Mmm, the sound effects rather quickly go from part of the atmosphere to part of the irritation, don't they?

Martin: So what's your least favorite thing we've covered here?

Jon: Oh, love, I'm not going to pretend to have nearly enough memory of what we've covered so far to have a least favorite.

Martin: Really? Nothing that you regret or rescind?

Jon: Well, regret, certainly. It was one of the weeks where you went first, and your second item was mutual aid funds, and what they can do for marginalized communities, and I had to follow it with fucking Slapchop.

Martin, poorly suppressing laughter: In your defence, Slapchop, or whatever offbrand we have, is pretty useful, especially when either your scar or my arthritis is acting up.

Jon: I'm still not convinced you didn't somehow see my notes for the recording and decided you get revenge for the first year that we knew each other.

Martin, no longer suppressing his laughter: Yep, you got me! This marriage wasn't an act of insurance fraud, but it was a near decade long con to humiliate you on a podcast that about twenty people listen to. I'll draft up the divorce papers immediately, and then we can finally go our separate ways. 

Jon: I'm glad you've at last admitted it. Such a weight off of my shoulders. Goodbye forever then.

Martin: Right.

Jon: Right.

[A beat.]

[There's a pfft from one of them, before both dissolve into giggles that lasts a good 30 seconds.]

Martin, slightly out of breath: I can't believe we're the kind of people that talk this much about speciality kitchen gadgets.

Jon: Sorry about that.

Martin: God, don't apologize. I'm, like, deliriously happy with our varying degrees of useful cooking ware filled life. If you had told 25 year old me that one day he'd be debating the merits of getting a tortilla press with his husband, he'd have wept, I tell you.

Jon: Funny, if you told 25 year old me the same thing, he would've said "You don't know the future,piss off" and then quietly have a bit of a panic at 3 am that night.

Martin: I bet you were insufferable in your mid-twenties.

Jon: First of all, who isn't, secondly, I was fresh out of Oxford, and third, I was insufferable in my late twenties, as you can attest to, and I'm insufferable now, as you can further attest to, so extrapolation would indicate that, yes, I was insufferable back then.

Martin: Probably a different kind of insufferable, though.

Jon: There are different kinds?

Martin: Of course! You used to be "prick boss" insufferable and now you're "smug in a way that I can't admit I find hot or it will go straight to your head" insufferable.

Jon, in the aforementioned smug tone: Oh, really?

Martin: See, see! Straight to your head.

Jon: Well straight is probably the wrong descriptor-

Martin: Oof, 4 out of 10 joke, babe.

Jon: That would be a far more convincing rating if you weren't grinning right now.

Martin: It's a genuine review, I'm just well known to be a sucker.

Jon: You and me both, darling.

Martin: Okay, if you're pulling out darling, you're clearly in too giddy of a mood to be focused on recording. Last question, from Jess, "You two mentioned meeting at work, but how did you actually end up together?" That's easy, Jon pulled me out of a hell dimension and then we went on the lam together to Scotland.

Jon: If that's not the way to tell a cute boy you like him, I don't know what is.

Martin: All right, that wraps up this bonus episode, and as the old saying goes, hiding from murderers in a cottage is more conducive to romance than suggesting you gouge out your eyes together.

Jon, cut off: Hey-!

[sprinklesandshatters]

A Review on NCT 127′s 3rd Album <Sticker>

So NCT 127 just came back with their 3rd Full Album <Sticker> and this is my first 127 comeback since I became a fan last year! Neozone is such a special album for me as it was their first album that I explored entirely. I've known NCT as the group who never fails any expectations so I've kept mine up although I know they'll exceed it anyway. And guess what, they did! I absolutely love their new album hence this review~

This isn't a technical music review—as I am not a musician myself—but rather a listener's honest takes, goofy notes, and interpretation on each of the tracks in the album. I admit I've also struggled to build my own opinions on some of the tracks until I listened to them over and over again.

I have also heard there are mixed opinions on the title track <Sticker> and a lot says it's another acquired taste. But I think it's not just that, as it can be a grower, just like how most of NCT's songs were for me. Maybe after a few listens and a right passage of time, it will grow on those people. The bottom line here is, I like it a lot! 😛

So I listed down the songs according to their respective track numbers and followed each with a bulleted list of my opinions and interpretations.

(Viewer/reader discretion: before you continue, minors, do not interact as there are few 18+ contents under the cut. Thank you.)

1. Sticker

THEY DIDN'T JUST PUNCH A NEW NOTCH ON THE BELT LIKE THAT

THIS SONG SLAPS, LITERALLY SLAPS… AND WHIPS 

The recorder at the intro boyyyy I thought something was wrong but then I remember it’s NCT lmao

It already stuck in my head from my first listen from the Instagram audio.

With Taeyong opening the verse with his divine rapping, I knew I'm in for a new ride.

STICK-UH STICK-UGH STICK-UGHGHGH

To those complaining it sounding like noise music, imagine it sounding generic. I don't think it would fit as the title track. Not a b-track or in their repertoire, even. They are called NCT because they define the NEO in the music culture and music technology!

It honestly was an unorthodox, just like all of their title tracks, which I’m inherently here for.

Literally, no one does it like them!

The growls and the vocal flexes and adlibs! (You can tell it has Yoo Youngjin's brand.)

The crisp metronome sound that’s consistently ticking except for the pre-chorus and the dance break adds depth to the soundscape. I love how it’s used instead of the usual snaps.

The production quality blew my mind. Like how can someone think those melodies would sound so exquisite? CAN I CALL THEM GENIUS?

The piano at the back, oh my God—Yes! It adds this mystifying element to the song.

I'm not sure if it's a midi violin at the pre-chorus, but it added thrill to the song. It was a great transition from the bass line in the verses to the combination of the flawless harmony with the same instrumental.

"You treat me like a boy, like a grown-up child chasing a dream" JUNGWOO BABY NO MORE HUH

Taeil, Doyoung, and Haechan—the bridge vocal trinity!

But why the heck are they cowboys? I dig the concept, but why? LMAO

BTW GUNSLINGER MARK I’M ON MY KNEES YEEHAW

This is easily one of my favorite tracks from NCT 127's entire discography 💚

2. Lemonade

(⌐■_■)

Jaehyun starting off this song with his deep voice eee

The song opens to a verse oozing with chill confidence. They're like, yeah you're lurking because we’re cool.

This is such a huge slap to their haters. NCT's not chillin' like a villain, nah they're the main characters!

Well maybe they’re villains, but still ya not cooler than them ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Funny enough how they could have just referred haters as simply lemons whose sour/bitter to the taste, but 127 squad's success is sweeter than all the haters' spiteful remarks so yeah, SIPPY SIPPY LEMONADE 🧃

"WOOF"

I might have just barked too wOW

Yuta’s vocals hooooO his voice just sounds so glamorous mhmm

Also Mark referencing their previous title tracks such as: Firetruck, Cherry Bomb, and Regular (it's Irregular in the lyrics) in his rap part 👌💅

I just love Mark's energy when he raps. HE RESOLUTELY BITES AND STRAIGHT UP EATS EVERY TIME HE DOES.

3. Breakfast

Now breakfast time, oh jeez!

AAAHAHFU—

Summer 127's bestie!

If Summer 127 talks about dancing all night long, Breakfast is the morning after.

You know what it is.

"Even if I gulp and drink you, it's not enough for me." oho Taeyong no you ha—STOP

Sexual innuendos aside, isn't it just sweet if someone tells you they'd want to have breakfast with you every day?  Okay maybe I'm melting at the thought 😩🙈💞

And I can see myself dancing to this song as I make breakfast (in the afternoon or at midnight bc I’m crazy)

This was an okay b-track for me at the first skim on the album, but boy it grew on me wildly.

Honestly one of my favorite tracks in this album.

4. Focus

Did I just invade a private call? LMAO

The analog voice filters make it like so.

Dude, this feels intimate in the level of eavesdropping a phone call between seasoned lovers. Then you realize you hear them whispering their kinks over the line and you're ooh, that's sexy! hfgklhfhf

My first listen to this, I almost went feral because,

"I can't wait to eat you…" when it's actually "I can't wait 'til we chill…" aahaha

"Baby call me when you want me." OKAY!

This sounds relaxing and chill. I'd love to play this on a late night drive or just before bed time along with Fly Away With Me, Sun & Moon, My Youth, and Long Flight.

Belongs to ‘make out session’ playlist  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

That was lowkey a playlist recommendation, huh?

I'd be kidding if I don't say I could touch myself while listening to this song AHAHAFGHFJFJ

I didn't know this would grow on me this much lol I love love LOVE THIS!

5. The Rainy Night

Ooh, the holy melancholy!

Piano at the intro—I knew I'd cry to this.

This song isn't just about break-up, but the heartbreak after one.

The yearning; the remnant pieces from the shattering of what was once there.

I think I crumbled from this one.

This hit so hard I felt like I fit in the shoes with the lyrics throughout the entire song.

What’s fascinating is I clearly forgot the title when I mentally said this sounds like a sad rainy day song from the first listen.

Something I’d turn up when it suddenly rains, just because I want to feel the blues.

Taeil and Haechan singing in lower register? I wanna cry :( they’re just one of the best vocalists in K-music industry right now.

Could have been also nice if they added Yuta to the vocals.

"My selfish heart who waits for you to come back," OKAY WHO HURT THEM?

And the fact that they sang it so good that it translated every ounce of the emotions well even before I looked up for English translations is the reason why I love this song too.

6. Far

Hmm… What the hell?! Do I like this? Wait...

Alright!

The jumpy vibe from the first verse to the pre-chorus set the mood for this song. It sounds merry and heavy. It was honestly too much to take until I’ve reached the chorus part.

Honestly, I think this song could fit NCT Dream better, as it gives off a vibe similar to Hello Future's b-tracks. If some credible source say this could have made HF’s track list, I might believe you too fast.

Also Dream’s Deja Vu where they go na nananananana na na na~

Playful yet confident! That’s what I mean!

As usual, the vocals are insane! Vocal flex from left to right!

I swear Jungwoo sounded a bit like Taemin at the second verse that I had to replay it hahaha

I love hearing Johnny as a vocalist! SM, how many signs do you need until you utilize his vocal talent???

Taeil's part where he sings, "go nuts, go nuts, 'til we go bust, go bust" IDEK BUT I SNORTED A LAUGH AT FIRST LISTEN HFCAHKFHK

Not my favorite, but still great though!

But wait it’s actually stuck in my head???

7. Bring The Noize

Yes, they never beat those noise music allegations

HERE'S SOME NOIZE, BITCHES

I love me some noisy percussions. AND THE BASS YO

This screams so much confidence!

The build up from the pre-chorus to the chorus—FIRE!

This song reminds me a lot of SuperM's Super Car, especially with the engine roar samples and the battle cry-like singing at the chorus.

JAEHYUN RAPPING? You mean Jaehyun the visual, the vocalist, the actor, the model, the funny dude, aka my everything?! (markie bb look pls look away for a moment)

THEY DELIVERED IT STRAIGHT FROM NEOCITY THAT'S SOME NCT MUSIC RIGHT THERE NO ONE DOES IT LIKE THEM

When I said I'd play Focus on a late night drive, and if I add this in the playlist, VROOM VROOM SPEED LIMIT WHAT

OUTTA MY WAY

“We got no shame” ouh TAEYONG’S FLOW IS JUST VERY HIM AND HE’S IN A LEAGUE OF HIS OWN

You know what's so clever about this song? It's how it ended with Mark's final rap without any instrumental, leaving you  standing there with a doppler effect-like post experience.

A super car on a super speed just whooshed past you and you look its way as it zips through the road. It's gone in an instant but you're floored dumbfounded at a sidewalk. That's how I describe this song.

8. Magic Carpet Ride

This song… Wow. Oh gosh it's so beautiful.

Their harmony in the chorus—it makes me want to kiss someone so passionately that I'd cry.

This makes me want to feel love that transcends the universe. Literally, just please take me on a magic carpet ride :(

The background harmonies too oh my goodness—HEAVENLY.

Jaehyun's voice is so warm and soulful it fits perfectly with songs of this genre.

Okay alright Doyoung Grande!

And Taeil makes me feel like I'm listening to old school R&B.

The first time I heard this from the track video, I can't stop replaying because it's just that great.

This makes me want to love. I think that sums it up.

9. Road Trip

This is such a soothing song for me, especially how I easily become nostalgic thinking about the road trips I've had.

Whenever I listen to this, my brain immediately conjures up thoughts of my ideal getaways. Gazing at the sky through the car window, stirring up from a nap in the middle of the ride, and   eventually reaching your destination.

Oh, to travel around anywhere... (curse you covid-19)

Okay that's it. I'M PACKING UP.

But where do I go—

I could also imagine Mark playing this on the guitar and the other members sing along together, something like that.

Just Wholesome™ vibes.

I love how it evokes such a nice emotion within me effortlessly.

This isn't my favorite, but I still love this.

10. Dreamer

Eyyyy such a refreshing song!

This song is so bright it makes me want to dance. I play this first in the shower!

It reminds me so much of Elevator (from Neozone)

The horns make it more lively I think!

Yuta and Jungwoo's voice suits lively songs like this.

The background vocal in low register in Taeyong's part in the first verse is so good ahhfhf

Taeil, the R&B vocal king you are...

There's this part where Doyoung and Johnny harmonized, that at first listen they seemed to clash, but it sounded actually fine after a few listens. Maybe it's just that I've never heard them do it before.

And I think it's Doyoung's laugh at the end of the bridge? Oh my goodness I really love this too!

11. Promise You

MY FIRST LOVE AND MOST FAVORITE SONG IN THE ALBUM!!!

The first time I heard this from their NCIT Sharehouse Sitcom, I fell in love with the song already.

It sounds like something you'd feel from a warm, welcoming hug.

The lyrics are so beautiful and endearing. It's definitely a be-there-for-you type of song that will touch your heart.

It definitely sounds like a promise.

A song about platonic intimacy.

This really fits to be the closing song of the album. It's like the end of it but holds a promise that says “see you soon.”

Because they cherish their fans like that.

It's also like I've watched a movie with a happy ending, where the camera pans up to the clear sky and this song starts playing.

Speaking of ending, I would love to hear them sing this as an encore stage in their concert. You know, that moment just before the stage lights die down at the end of the concert where they send final blows of flying kisses to NCTzens. Then you come home smiling and crying.

This wasn't supposed to be this long since I originally planned to write this with just simple phrases and emojis but I got too engrossed lol. I also meant to include my own ratings but I figured it’s pointless since I can’t really decide about them hahaha

I really enjoyed the whole album and I love how they're progressively defining what NEO means by breaking through standards. It's not NCT music if it doesn't make you say "WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT?" But then you realize it’s stuck in your head and you’re enjoying it already.

✨ OVERALL RATING: 127/10 💚

if you’ve reached until here, thank you for letting me share you a braincell or two 💞

[yslkook]

Unattainable

pairing: jimin x reader (fwb au) summary: it's 2 AM and your thoughts are filled with nothing but jimin. he thinks you're too good for him- you deserve better than him and his broken heart. (imagine THIS jimin) word count: 1.4k warnings: masturbation, facetime sex, some thoughts of self-deprecation a/n: written for ms hana @cutechim !! happy birthday to my dear friend<33 it was only fitting for the first jimin fic i ever wrote to be written for hana's bday. i hope u enjoy<3 and thank u to @jinpanman for reading this!

It’s nearly 2 AM but Jimin can’t sleep. Because you can’t sleep, and you’re currently fumbling with the buttons on your satin pajama top with shaky, clumsy fingers.

Jimin doesn’t bother stifling his laugh. You’re cute, really, you are. You glare at him, admonishing him through the screen, hoping that he can feel your irateness through the laptop.

It’s taken him a long time to convince you to get to this point. Well, it wasn’t so much as convincing as it was you becoming more comfortable and attached to him in this way. You had been so shy in the beginning, trembling under his arms with heated cheeks as each pass of his fingers would stroke your skin.

But this had been your idea. Jimin reminds you frequently of this. You were the one who had approached him shortly after another birthday, fragments of desire and the nebula of an idea on the tip of your tongue.

You had been nearly in tears, tired of convincing yourself that you were okay with being so incredibly seemingly undesirable. With your birthday just passing on the horizon, it had felt as though every single ounce of self-worth had come crashing down on you.

It didn’t help that everyone around you were either in long-term relationships or engaged or married.

You just wanted someone to hold you, to maybe look at you in a way that stole your breath right from your throat. You wanted someone to teach you all of the things you never learned, someone to teach you how to kiss. How to love.

Was it a good idea? To spill your entire bleeding, delicate heart out to Jimin, to your oldest friend? Your oldest friend who you’ve always had a small crush on but never acted on because he has always seemed so unattainable, ethereal in that way?

You would say yes, that it was worth it. Because maybe even if he doesn’t reciprocate your feelings, having him like this is better than not having him at all-

“Help me,” You plead. You’re not above begging him and Jimin’s always had trouble saying no to you. You’ve always been unattainable to him, so brilliant and kind. When all he knew how to do was hurt, hurt, and hurt those around him. He’s damaged goods, rough around the edges. Jimin often asks himself why you still stick around him, when you’re a diamond and he is nothing but a jagged stone.

“Help you? You want me to help you with what exactly…” Jimin drawls, “Use your words, princess.”

Your heart bursts. You can’t take it anymore.

“Kiss me,” You breathe, “Fuck me, love me. Any of it. All of it.”

“I can’t give you love,” Jimin says softly, “I’ll give you everything else. I’ll give you anything you want.”

He can’t give you his love, because you deserve better than his broken heart. But the rest, he can give you. If Jimin can make you happy in this way, then he’ll take it. He’ll take any ounce of your love that he can get, because he is a parasite and you are too good for him.

“Take your shirt off, princess,” Jimin nearly purrs, his eyes dark and expectant.

“If you weren’t so far away, you could do it for me,” You huff, trying to soothe your nerves. He laughs, the sound gentle and musical.

“You’ll like this, I know you will,” He says. His voice is smooth and sure, soft and firm. Enticing, like a honey you always want a taste of.

“Okay,” You shrug, “I trust you.”

It surprises him every time. Despite your many years of friendship and through his many mishaps in nearly all facets of his life, you still trust him.

“Tilt the screen down a little more, I can’t see your face,” Jimin says. When you do as he says, he smiles widely with crescent eyes. “There you go.”

He looks especially handsome tonight, his brown hair falling effortlessly into his eyes. Somehow he always looks good, no matter the hour or time of day. Rings adorn his lithe fingers.

You can vividly remember where his fingers had been just a few nights ago- buried deep in you, pulling wet, squelching sounds from your pussy and breathy moans from your lips. Despite your embarrassment over the sounds you didn’t even know you were capable of making, Jimin had reassured you that he found you breathtaking.

“You got something to show me, princess?” Jimin says, giving you a knowing grin. He leans in closer to the camera on his laptop, trying to see as much of you as he can. It’s his own fault that you’re unable to sleep.

After all, he’s the one who had sent you an audio file of him touching himself while moaning your name breathlessly, telling you exactly what he was thinking while he teased himself. Your name sounded like the sweetest poison on his tongue but you chase the feeling, and you chase him.

Jimin is sweet and protective, he always has been. With you at least. You’re his princess, after all. Despite what people think of him, what people have thought of him… You’ve always been around with open arms, an open heart, and now, open legs.

“I’m nervous,” You admit softly, “I’ve never done this before.”

“I know,” Jimin acknowledges, “But it’s just me and I’ve got you. If you don’t want to-”

“No! I want to. And I,” You pause and sigh heavily, “I want this to be with you.”

“You can say no whenever you want,” He says, as he always does. You nod in understanding and part your legs for him to see. Jimin swallows, his throat suddenly dry. He smiles at you through the screen as he leans forward even more, the necklace you had bought for him on his birthday bouncing along the base of his neck.

You salivate at the sight of his collarbones. You’re a simple girl. Jimin’s room is dimly lit, the pale glow of the lamp behind him illuminating the sharp planes of his pretty face. Pretty. Everything about him is angelic, even if he would say otherwise.

“Jimin,” You murmur, fingers dancing dangerously close to the hem of your white panties. He sucks in an audible breath, his eyes narrowing at the wet patch sitting pretty on your panties. You slip your hand into your panties, lazily stroking your slit as you watch him.

“Look how wet you made me,” You coo. Jimin nearly scoffs- he’s made a demon out of you. A year ago, the words spilling from your lips would’ve had you flustered and shy. And now here you were, presenting your glossy folds as if you were wrapped up in white lace just for his eyes.

You were, and you both knew it. Jimin loves this side of you, loves that he’s opened you up. Like his very own lotus, your petals slick with shiny need for him. For him.

He’s selfish and he loves that he’s the only one who’s seen you like this. That you’re the only one who had given him this chance. That you listen so willingly, so eagerly.

It makes his cock stir. He palms himself over his shorts, moaning to himself quietly. “Lemme see you, princess,” Jimin says, spreading his legs, “Come closer.”

You shift a little closer to the laptop so he can watch you with wide eyes as you slip out of your panties and toss them to the side. He softly tells you to spread your legs further, to touch yourself for him.

His mouth waters, when you tease yourself before finally allowing your index finger to rub your clit slowly. “What are you thinking about, princess,” Jimin breathes, “Tell me. Tell me everything.”

“That I miss you,” You mumble, rolling your hips into your hand, “Wish you were here.”

“Finger yourself, princess,” Jimin demands softly, “You wish it were me?”

“Y-yeah,” You nod eagerly, “Always wish it were you.”

His words are filthy, longing dripping off of the ends of his words. Jimin tells you what to do, tells you what he’s doing- that’s stroking his cock to the sight of your sweet pussy. Jimin will even pretend for a little bit, fooling himself as he tells you to fuck yourself on the dildo hidden in a box full of trinkets that he’s gotten you over the last year.

He’s so full of delusions that he can’t help but merge his desire and reality- “Who’s pussy is this?” Jimin whispers, your moans increasing in pitch as your clit catches on the silicone of the already wet dildo.

“Yours,” You let the words slip out of your mouth purposely, “Always yours.”

tags: @kookdbean @codeinebelle @jinpanman

[lxstfulbeans]

*Busts in with a plastic bag of crack* You want some crack, kids? I’ll give it to ya! 🥸 So Y/N forgot where she placed her phone at and her crush decides to call her phone to help hear the ringtone so she can find it better. However, Y/N forgot that she uses funny ass ringtones for said crush and even has funny contact pics/names for them in her phone. Said songs are “Something about you girl” by Ice JJ Fish, “Wap” but with Carl Wheezer’s voice, “Interior Crocodile Alligator”, and the NFL theme song. I would love to see head cannons of this for Hawks, Dabi, Aizawa and Bakugo.

“Something about you girl” - Hawks. He’s saved as “KFC” and his contact pic is of him making the light skin face that sent y/n to orbit (he thought she deleted it cuz it’s cringy)

“Wap” - Dabi. He’s saved as “Patchy the Pirate” and his pic is a blurred image of him chasing Y/N.

“Interior crocodile alligator” - Aizawa. He’s saved as “Dad of 20” and his pic is of him laying face first in his sleeping bag

“NFL Theme song” - Bakugo. He’s “Boom Boom Pomeranian” and his pic is of a Pomeranian with his hair photoshopped on it.

I know they’ll give some funny reactions! They’ll look at sis confused and she’ll just go “See about that...” and book it when she takes her phone. This idea had me busting my pancreas 💀💀💀

Bruh I- 💀 I’m literally hearin these damn audios as I’m reading this ask, I’m rolling. This is the best 😂

— 3. 2. 1. ACTION!! —

HEADCANON: Y/N loses her phone and forgets that she saved crack-fuelled pictures and ringtones assigned to her crush.

KEIGO TAKAMI [HAWKS]:

You were losing your fucking mind at this point.

Where the fuck could you have misplaced your cellphone?? You had to meet your homegirls at the club for girls night, PRONTO!!

Keigo raised a brow as he walked in on you basically tearing apart your living room for your phone, almost crying from frustration. “Whoa, kid. Ya lose something?” He had the nerve to ask when it was clearly the case.

Sure, there was a whole lotta things to love about this bird-man, but that smartass attitude was gonna get slapped outta him.

“dId yOu lOsE sOmeThInG- YES FOOL MY DAYUM PHONE!!” You huff, throwing another couch cushion on the floor before you fell to the floor in exhaustion. “I got to meet the girls for girls night in twenty minutes, and I can’t find my phone!” You briefly explain.

You heard him chuckle, pulling out his own phone. “Okay, okay, calm down, kid. It ain’t the end of the world, y’know. I’ll just call it and we’ll listen out for the ringtone.” He says, scrolling for a bit before finding your contact, pressing the call button and..

That’s when y’all heard it.

“THERE’S SOMETHIN’ ABOUTCHA GURLL! THAT JUST MAKES MY HEAD WANNA TWIRL!!”

Your ringtone went off under the couch, making Keigo look at you with the most confused face ever, his wings puffing up as he looked at you, yet you couldn’t stop laughing as he used one of his feathers to drag the phone from under the couch.

“What the hell, kid?? I though you deleted this cringey ass selfie!” He whined, looking at the contact photo of him making that dumbass lightskin face that had you howling the other day. “And what the hell is this ringtone?? AND YOU SAVED ME AS KFC??”

“BRUH I CAN’T BREATHE SHUT UPP—“ You screech as you curl up, tears pricking your eyes as you roll on the floor. Keigo couldn’t help but snicker, rolling his eyes at you as he got you off the floor, “Okay, you got some explaining to do.”

“Well, you see, what had happened was-“ You begin, trying to hold back your laughter before snatching your phone and purse, running out of the door. “I’ll see you later, KFC!! I’m running late!”

DABI:

“Aw, damn! Where in the entire hell did I put my phone??” You groaned.

Of course, this wasn’t the first time you lost your phone and you swore it would’ve been the last. But, you were so caught up on multitasking with so much shit you wanted to get out of the way, you completely forgot about your phone.

You sighed as you now have to tear apart the lounge that you JUST straightened up, making this much worse than it had to be.

“Hey, little mouse. What’s with all the whining and hollering for?”

“I can’t find my phone, I’ve been all up in y’all raggedy-ass lair lookin’ for my shit so I can bounce!” You say with an eye roll as you placed your hands on your hips, clearly not in the mood for the bullshit right now.

“Okay, calm down. It’s just a phone, I can just call it and you can listen out for the ringtone.” He said with a sigh as he brought out his phone, dialing your number and waiting for the tone to play. The two of you went from room to room, getting more anxious everytime the phone went to voicemail. You were visibly going to cry, there was no way that you could’ve left your phone anywhere that WASN’T in the LOV Lair.

“I swear, if you start crying, I won’t let you live it down.” You hear Dabi mumble to you as you both entered the last room, dialing your number one last time until...

“NYEOW FROM THE TOP, MAKE IT DROP, THAT’S A WHAP. BRING A BUCKET AND A MOP, THAT’S WHAP”

Your phone was jamming out on a chair, Dabi looking at you like you just committed a grave sin while the ringtone played. The longer he stared at you, wanting an explanation, you can’t help but burst into laughter as you crawl to your phone, and let the tone finish.

You just hoped that your crush was still going to hang out with you after this crackhead mishap.

“MACARONI IN A POT, THAT’S A WHAP. JIMMYY”

Dabi was literally at a loss for words, (lookin’ a lil like confused bakugou rn 👀) as you wheezed in laughter. “[Y/N]... what in the fuck was that?” He asked, you can tell he was serious from how low and menacing your name was said. You were either about to run for your life or die laughing.

“And why the fuck is my name, “Patchy The Pirate”? And what the hell is this photo?” He asked again. Man, was it getting hot in there or was it just you?

“Well, you see here, uh- MOINK!” You shout, howling in laughter as you were chased around the building. Kurogiri shaking his head in disappointment.

SHŌTA AIZAWA (DADDY. ERASERHEAD):

“Oh no.”

“Oh, no...”

“Oh, no no no no no..”

This cannot be happening, this CANNOT be happening right now. Lord have mercy, please let today not be the day.

“Goddamn it, where’s my phone?!”

Yep, your phone. Your new phone that Shōta got for your birthday, who you also had a huge crush on but would never tell that to ANYONE. You promised yourself that you wouldn’t lose this phone, it was definitely the most precious thing ever.

“Fuuuuck!” You whined, already on the verge of panicking while your tore apart your room for that birthday gift. “Hey, what’s all this racket for? I’m trying to sleep.” said your friend, roommate, and crush, Shōta.

“I-I’m just lookin’ for somethin’, Shō! Sorry for all this noise..” you mumbled an apology as you continued your search, swinging your arm around underneath the bed.

“You lost your phone, didn’t you, [Y/N]?”

DAMN, he catches on quick for somebody who sleeps 25/8. Maybe it’s because you don’t really have trouble looking for stuff unless it’s something really important to you.

You sighed, the embarrassment and disappointment washing over you as you laid in defeat on the floor. “Yeah.. I can’t find it..” you mumbled.

The older man sighed, cracking his neck as he got out his phone. “Okay, just calm down. I’ll call it and we’ll just listen out for your ringtone, okay? If we can’t hear it, we’ll track it.”

God, why was he so hot when he took responsibility? You couldn’t help but sit up and nod at his words as he scrolled through his contacts until he found your name, confirming the call until..

“INTERIOR CROCODILE ALLIGATOR. I DRIVE A CHEVROLET MOVIE THEATER.”

Your phone blasted the same line over and over, as hard as you tried to contain it, you couldn’t help but screech in laughter when you looked up to see Shōta’s disturbed, confused, and concerned face as he picked up your phone from underneath your dresser.

“”Dad of 20”?? What the hell type of name is that?” He asked, the iconic sleeping bag worm as his contact photo. The joke behind it was the fact that he was a whole teacher at U.A. You always thought it was cute that he was basically a father figure to those future heroes.

Plus, you wouldn’t stop joking about them being his, “lil chilrens”.

“Aight, aight. I wanna thank you for finding my phone, I promise not to lose it again!” You quickly say, trying to creep out of the room until you were confined with his capture weapon.

“I’m not done with you yet.”

Fuck..

KATSUKI BAKUGOU:

“Hey, dumbass! Hurry up, or we’ll miss the movie!”

Damn, damn, damn!! You can’t believe you just lost your phone right now, you could’ve sworn you left it on your bed before you started fixing your hair in the bathroom.

“Shit, shit! Bakugou, can you help me find my phone real quick? Pretty please?” You call out to him, really anxious because you were really looking forward to this movie and you could not miss a second of it!

“Ugh, are you serious?? What did I tell you about keeping up with your shit!” He groaned, getting out his phone as he dialed your number and listened to the trill.

“I know, I know! I promise I’ll be more careful!” You say as you listened out for it, only to pull aside your blankets to see your vibrating phone with the ringtone on blast.

Oh yes, the NFL Theme. What made you lose your shit was Bakugou’s flabbergasted facial expression as he looked down at your contact photo and nickname for him.

You couldn’t help but cackle as you saw a vein pop out, popping hands reaching out for you. “Hey! What the fuck is this shit?? Imma show you a pomeranian!” He shouted.

“Katsu! Katsu! Relaaaxx!! You know you’re my bestie and I love you, but we got a movie to catch so let’s do this later fam.” You snicker, trying to calm yourself down as you yoinked your phone and took off out the door with your purse.

“OH, JUST WAIT UNTIL WE GET BACK HOME!”

— END SCENE —

Sorry that Bakugou’s was kinda short! But, hope you enjoyed these!