#and i learned how to Not use the pencils ty v much

[calculatingminutiae]

ostensibly this is a captor blog but hear me out: watercolor practice

[kvngjoong]

seonghwa + nsfw a-z

requested! sorry it took me so long. i will be doing yunho next, but so far haven’t got requests for anyone else. let me know if you want it done for another member ❤️

A: Aftercare

considering that seonghwa probably makes pack lunches for people, aftercare will be one of his specialities. seonghwa is someone who enjoys the looking after people element of a relationship and will always be there to check you have a blanket over you (especially if you fall asleep quickly after sex) and something to clean you up with etc. he’s prepared for absolutely anything. like a big first aid kit, but for sex

B: Body Part

nothing really stands out here, but seonghwa would probably be a bit basic (no offence meant) and likes your waist or your thighs, probably your thighs (more on that later) because he leaves a lot of marks there and likes being between them. for him, he probably won’t ever talk about it, but it’s likely his favourite body part for himself is his arms, or his hands, since he’s pretty good with them

C: Cum

this is probably a bit controversial but he’s messy. yeah, he doesn’t like mess, but there is something telling me that he would cum anywhere, everywhere, and feel bad about it later. poor boy gets carried away with what he’s doing and just cums. there’s a moderate amount of it, and it probably tastes a bit better than the average. he does like it when he cums on your thighs though, cause he thinks that’s hot

D: Dirty Secret

he really wants you to dom him. like it’s a wish that he can’t express enough but he’s kinda afraid of sharing it with you (even if you have some switch or dom tendencies) because he still likes the idea of being dom and seeming in control. so more often than not, when he’s on his own, he’ll tell himself that he’s not allowed to cum until he’s with you, because the only one who can allow him to cum is you

E: Experience

some experience, probably one of the more experienced but not loads. he knows what he’s doing, probably, though always happy to learn more as he goes along. he doesn’t seem like someone who would cringe at the sound of the word sex so likely can make it up as he goes along, too

F: Favourite Position

since we’ve established he’s a secret sub, probably likes it most when you’re riding him, but also likes anything that means you’re taking control (and he can take it easily off him). if he had to pick overall for everything, he’s a big big fan of when you ride his face, like a big fan, and he would pick that over sex anyway

G: Goofy

it depends on you. if you’re joking around then so will he, but if it’s really serious and you’re both really, really in the mood then he will be as serious as he can be. he doesn’t often initiate any jokes himself, he will just flow off whatever mood you’re in. maybe afterwards he will be a bit more goofy but not during

H: Hair

something says he keeps himself trimmed but nothing over the top. doesn’t shave completely, just likes it tidy. he may think it’s a bit weird to have no hair. he doesn’t really have a preference for you but would probably like it if you were the same. no need to shave it all, just keep it tidy

I: Intimacy

definitely intimate. sex with him will never be just cause he wanted to. every time he has sex the submissive side of him will come out a bit more and he will want to worship you completely, and he thrives off the intimacy between you. he’s a real softie at heart. he wants you to know how much you love him, and if he has to make you cum 4 times in a row to prove that to you, he will do that with nothing but pure love running through him

J: Jack Off

as before, he probably doesn’t do it too often because he tells himself you would want to do it for him. but sometimes things are too much and he will have to jack off in the middle of the night because he can’t get specific things out of his head. it’s probably not something like you looked hot, he probably gets off to something you’ve said or imaging you doing something

K: Kink

probably has a lot of kinks and is seriously kinky, despite what he may initially show. he’ll seem like someone who just wants to dom you but as you get to know him, and when he finally admits he wants to sub too, the floodgates are open. he’s into a lot of basic stuff but also would venture into some more niche topics. maybe likes it when you tie him up, more so than tying you up. but in the same sense, he wouldn’t like it if you used any toys on him, he likes doing that to you. definitely likes getting told what to do, and likes it when you tell him he can’t cum (as per his dirty secret)

L: Location

whilst sex is mostly for the bedroom, he’s happy to eat you out or touch you in any location. the kitchen, the car, the shower, the anything. he’s not into exhibitionism or anything, but he doesn’t really care too much if it’s a public place. he doesn’t have a high sex drive, he would just do it if you asked him to. his favourite will always be the comfort of his/your own home

M: Motivation

you? is there much more to it? anything from an off handed comment to you touching him a certain way. he may be a bit competitive sometimes so when someone says that they don’t think he’s good at something, he will definitely want to prove to you he is. or he just misses you. something like that

N: NO

not into threesomes or moresomes. likes it when it’s just you two, so wouldn’t enjoy having someone else with you. really wouldn’t like you to ask someone else to do something with him, either. it’s just really not his thing

O: Oral

if it wasn’t already clear he loves giving oral to you. he’s not sure why, but do you really need a reason behind it? he would pick it over you giving him oral, but that isn’t to say he doesn’t enjoy when you’re going down on him. when he’s in a more dominating mood then you going down on him and him going down on you is a norm. when he’s sub, his treat is eating you out

P: Pace

he’s not too fast or slow, but more on the quicker side. he doesn’t really slow down before he cums or anything. since a lot of his effort goes into foreplay, the actual sex will seem quicker than expected

Q: Quickie

to tease you, yeah, he will 100% be into it. maybe pushing you against a door and fucking you from behind is a thing he does too. if you’re encouraging him, he’s there for it. blow job in the car? he’s for that too

R: Risk

given who he is, seonghwa is unlikely to try taking risks and almost getting caught by people. it probably doesn’t excite him or anything, in fact it will more likely turn him off if anything. he wants to know he’s got some time to work with you, rather than always been on edge should someone need something from him

S: Stamina

has a lot of stamina and could definitely go for a while. though he can sweat a bit, he can still keep going for a while afterwards. it may surprise you a bit how far he can go, but anything to please you, right?

T: Toy

likes using them on you, not the other way around. nothing too much, maybe a vibrator or two, some handcuffs (but it would be way better if he used his tie), and maybe one of those collars if you wanted one. you know, just a few different things he can use from time to time. really wouldn’t like anything to do with cockrings, or butt plugs, he’s not a fan

U: Unfair

he’s not the biggest tease, but he can if he wants to. most of the time he won’t tease you all that much but don’t take his lack of doing so as a reason to assume he will never do so. because of his sub tendencies he won’t want tease you that often. but if you teased him then he would like it very much. he would really want you to edge him. more than he admits to, at least

V: Volume

his actions mean more than his words, so he won’t say too much. instead, he’ll let out these tiny little whines and moans every now and then, and groan when he’s fucking you. so, he’s quiet, but he’s not that quiet. makes a special little noise when he cums for you which is a nice little treat. probably tells you that he loves you occasionally when he cums

W: Wild Card

when seonghwa finally gets the courage to tell you that he wants to sub, it is definitely a sight to see. he’ll mention it to you one night and doesn’t expect you to follow through with his wishes the very next day. he’d be surprised when you send the first text in the morning telling him what to do when he gets home. he’ll follow your instructions to wait on the bed for him, clothes off, and when there’s ten minutes until you get home he’s practically throbbing for you

X: X-Ray

he’s a touch above average; a bit longer than average but average girth if not a bit thinner than others. he’s happy with how big he is though, and you will be too, so there’s no problems

Y: Yearning

doesn’t have the highest of sex drives, so he will usually be waiting for you to initiate something unless he really, really wants something and he thinks you’ve been teasing him all day. if he knows you’ve both got some free time though, he’ll probably pencil in some time for any nsfw activities he feels like

Z: ZZZ

if it’s not a quicky, and he’s not doing anything else after (ie it’s not morning sex, which isn’t the most common with him), seonghwa will likely be there to lay next to you, cuddle for a bit, talk for a bit more, then go to sleep. he definitely gets tired after, hence why morning sex isn’t a big thing, and you can probably tell when his answers start to become less and less responsive and he eventually drifts off

a/n: thanks guys. now i have the fattest crush on seonghwa

[blastthatsadfm]

tagged by @conspacelien , TY! 

A- age:  Timeless and never out of style!

B- birthplace: HM! I don’t really want to answer that, either!

C- current time: 16:50

D- drink you last drank: Coffe is my way to go beverage. My way to go morning starter. And afternoon starter. And I like to drink coffe at night, too?? My essential habit.

E- easiest person to talk to:  Talking to anyone is always a Risk and a Bet. Especially here. I’m barely confortable talking to old friends. I do take lenghts to get out of my confort zone and talk to people though, but I always feel like it’s a risk involved, for everyone. BTW!If you have been on the other side of my incessant rants and my unexpected approaches at talking to you, I’m so, so sorry! I’ve tried, I really did.

F- favorite song:  Currently, I’ve been listening a lot to She’s my collar from the new Gorillaz Album, which I’ve listened to entirely like... last thursday? Greaty reccomend Saturnz Bar and Busted and Blue btw. But if we’re talking all time favorites, then mostly of Childish Gambino’s and Arctic Monkeys discography . Shout out ot Redbone and Too Much To Ask which I could listen to, all day. 

G- grossest memory:  No, let’s not go there.

H- horror yes or no? Y E S. Favorite genre when I was a child. Still one of my all times favorite things to read and to read about. (And maybe to create? In the future?) I like old time horror tales and that good old psychological, introspective horror that leaves you wondering, like ... forever. Fun for everyone!

I- in love? I’m pretty sure I have like 3 crushes at least, currently. Never been “In love” though, unless you count all my “obsessions”, which are probably just things and people I honestly love.

J- jealous of people?  Not really. It was tough learning that but I’m glad I did. When it comes to Art, I’m really the best at doing Me and Appreciating how the others are doing their own thing.

K- killed someone? Some Authors of Things I Used To Love are just Dead To Me for what they did to their characters.

L- love at first sight or should I walk past again? To get my attention you should walk in circles around me at least 4 times. Not to impress me, just so I can literally notice you because I never .notice. anything. I’m a brick, socially. Completely oblivious. 

M- middle name: Rosa

N- number of siblings:   3! There’s Older Bro, Little Sister and Youngest Sister, the youngest of us all. I am the Second Born.

O- one wish?  For my pencil cases to come back, I’m so upset I’ve lost them, there were some expensive pens and pencils there, man. For my right wrist and spine to heal completely.

P- person you last called? A bus company to see if my Pencil Case (which I lost) might be there. It wasnt. ... =/

Q- question you’re always asked: How old are you? Usually with “you shouldnt be alone here at this hour”.

R- reason to smile: My favorite characters. My otps. My favorite songs and artists. And now that I’m home and not at campus, my pets and also my little sisters baking stuff for me.

S- song you last sang: I sometimes hum some rap lyrics to myself. That’s embarassing and we don’t talk about it, though.

T- time you woke up: Around 11:35. IT’s a saturday and tbh I wante to sleep until 14:00 if I could.

U- underwear color: White.

V- vacation: hahahahahaha poor people don’t do that, buddy. Someday though. Someday.

W- worst habit: I keep it to mysef, mostly and then I’ve end up building up feelings I’m unable to properly express.  That being said, I also talk and laugh with myself a lot which can be quite scary to witness if you’re not used to me doing that.

X- x-rays: The last I’ve done was one  on my chest cuz I had been coughing for 2 months and a half, in 2016. (I recovered! Don’t worry) Imma have to take one on my right hand and wrist, soon, though.

Y- your favourite food:  Anything with both chocolate and coffe??? And Ice cream?? The greatest combination. But also... I really like vegetables. And pasta.

Z- zodiac sign: LIBRA! you know, why not to tag mutuals that I don’t know too much about? ?? Huuuh... @shuuyakido @apetunias  @aya-tatsugami  Hope u guys don’t mind being tagged and doing this??

[lingthing]

uuhhhm 2, 3, 7, 10, 17, 21, 34!!

oh wowzers! /cracks knuckles

2. What’s your go-to drugstore brand?I’m going to cheat and say two: NYX and wet n wild. I lean towards nyx more for their lip products while I like wet n wild’s brushes and highlighters.

3. What’s the one product you absolutely need in your routine?CONCEALER. I have very dark circles around my eyes that make me look like a ghoul so I always gotta cover ‘em up.

7. What’s your least favorite product?Facial oils. I don’t doubt their beneficial properties for one’s skin, but for me personally, they don’t work. I always suffer bad, painful breakouts and am wary of trying any no matter how glowing the reviews.

10. Holy grail product?TARTE.SHAPE.TAPE.CONCEALER.Remember my raccoon eyes? All it takes is some shape tape and a damp beauty blender and they’re gone, but it doesn’t leave my under eye area all creasy and dried out. Do recommend!

17. Eyebrow pencil or powderPowder! I feel like applying it with a flat brush gives me a steadier hand and is easier to apply than drawing them on. I used to use an eyebrow powder pallete from morphe which was really nice but honestly, I just use elf eyebrow powder now. No more than two or three bucks and the color is perfect.

21. What’s your own secret to successful looking makeup?Again, I’m gonna cheat and go with two!First secret: Good skincare. The better your skin looks, the better your makeup will look. I go about my routine every single day and have actually fallen asleep and woken up with a loud gasp in horror cause I almost didn’t wash my face, lol! Second secret: Find and use products that are right for you. I used to buy all kinds of unnecessary stuff and religiously follow makeup do and don’t videos, but eventually learned that what works for other people might not work for me- and that’s okay *~*~*

34. What’s the weirdest life hack you’ve ever done?Used strange objects to get the perfect winged eyeliner including a spoon and an old store discount card. The road to achieving perfect eyeliner is a rocky one and I am now proud to say that I draw my wings freehanded ; v ;AhhhhHHHH, ty! These were so much fun to think about!

[frenchibi]

Tagged~

Ok, hold on to your hats people because this is going to be a long-ass post. I have been told my cuts don’t work on mobile (?? TUMBLR PLS) so if this doesn’t work I sincerely apologize in advance for a lot of scrolling :’) Alright so I was tagged... like 6 times I think? And I’m just going to answer them all in here xD

Also I’m gonna tag a bunch of people and you can just... decide which ones you want to do, do several, do all of them, do none at all - whatever you prefer xD @cheatos @chxngsey @fairylights101writes @cheetahleopard @snowflakers @notinvidia @anyadisee @tallihoo @lalikaa @seijouho @astersandstuffs @phea-chan @owlkaashi-keiji @heirxx @thehibiscusthief @screamingnitrogenchallenge @fandang1

...alright, let the oversharing begin :’)

1. Tagged by @grand-king-toru (thank you, and you’re tagged in all the other ones too, obviously!!) and @queeniwaizumi (your tag was a little different but basically all your questions were in this one too so I didn’t do it separately FORGIVE ME TAT - and ofc you’re tagged too!!)

Favourite place: My apartment, or on top of a mountain, or in my car, or at my mom’s house, or in a Café in the center of my city where I can sketch people Relationship status: Single Favourite colour: Phtalo blue and magenta Pets: I have allergies :’) Last song I listened to: We Know The Way from Moana Favourite tv show: If we’re talking anime, it’s Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood (by a MILE). As for non-anime shows, I’m currently enjoying A Series of Unfortunate Events very much (those books were my childhood & I’m so pumped for this series you have no idea) First Fandom: Harry Potter probably, first anime fandom was Inuyasha Hobbies: writing, drawing, singing, skiing, driving my siblings places (being the oldest is GreatTM), currently trying to learn to play the guitar Books I’m currently reading: Ella Minnow Pea by Mark Dunn (and 50 others I started in Better Days™ when I had more time for reading) Favourite book: Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini, The Chaos Walking trilogy by Patrick Ness, Harry Potter by JKR, Howl’s Moving Castle by Dianne Wynne Jones, Die Stadt der Träumenden Bücher by Walter Moers Worst thing you’ve ever eaten/tasted: Milk that had gone off. It’s gross. Living alone is hard, please don’t make the mistakes I did.

2. Tagged by @seidou-chan (thank you, you’re also obviously tagged in all the others as well~)

Name: call me French :D Nickname: French, Frenchie Gender: female Sign: Pisces Height: 155cm Sexual Orientation: Pansexual Hogwarts house: Gryffindor/Ravenclaw Favourite colour: (see above) xD Favourite animal: Dolphins, Turtles, Owls Time right now: 1:15pm Average hours of sleep: Ideally 8, currently 3, I probably need to see a doctor about this Cat or dog person: Allergies :’) (tbh I love both ok) Favourite fictional character from Harry Potter: Ginny Weasley (, Sirius Black, Molly Weasley, Hermione Granger, Bellatrix Lestrange) Number of blankets you sleep with: One Favourite singer or band: currently Of Monsters and Men Dream trip: Cities! I love sightseeing :D Also Skiing, always skiing. Dream job: Musical singer/actress When was this blog created: 20..13? Started out as a Supernatural blog xD When did your blog reach its peak: Still climbing hopefully What made you decide to make a tumblr: blame @notinvidia

3. Tagged by @marleeb (ty friend, we haven’t talked much yet so sorry for the spam of information here xD Feel free to do whichever of these tags interests you :D)

5 things you’ll find in my bag: Notebooks (at least 3) Assorted pens Allergy medication My wallet Haikyuu keychains :D

(see also this post)

5 things you’ll find in my bedroom: An enormous bookshelf (ca 1,5k books, 850 mangas) Assorted recording devices & equipment A large easel and all sorts of art supplies (acrylics, aquarelles, watercolors, pastels, colored pencils, crayons, markers, modeling paste, ink, soapstone) The door to my kitchen xD My workspace w/ computers and legal dictionaries ^^

5 things I’ve always wanted to do in life: Publish a novel Raise children Own a house with a private library and a large conservatory full of plants Perform on a large stage (did that, was amazing, love to do it again) Become a translator (lol I had no idea what i was signing up for)

5 things that make me happy: Singing (is the ultimate joy of my life) and performing w/ my choir Getting feedback for my writing (makes me ecstatic ngl) and exchanging ideas with people My brilliant, lovely, multi-facetted family My warm, patient and understanding friends Being able to create, and share my ideas to people who care about them :D 5 things I’m currently into: Moana (it has consumed my life and my life is infinitely better for it) Haikyuu (and the wonderful people I’ve met through it) My original stories (which I cannot wait to work on more) A Series of Unfortunate Events (the netflix series is so great and it really lives up to the books in my opinion??) Wasting time on tumblr and ignoring the BA-thesis that I need to be writing (and my work because why be responsible)

5 things on my to-do list: *cringes* my thesis My invoices & VAT returns Get someone to help me change a lightbulb (this is not a joke, I’m short) Finish writing two letters to friends that I’m working on :D (though this one I’m looking forward to) Finish writing the 60+ fics I’ve started and work on my original projects too :’)

(what a boring to-do list is2g)

5 things people may not know about me: I OVERSHARE ALL THE TIME (you knew that) I’m a legal translator (German/English) and I work freelance I am allergic to EVERYTHING I…really love…girls… I speak 4 languages (and a fifth one barely) :D

4. Tagged by @ghost--fox (this was a while back and I’m sorry for being so slow ;-; THANK YOU FOR TAGGING ME!!! I did your other tag too, below this one :D - obviously you’re tagged in any of the above if you feel like it xD)

Rules: Put your music on “Shuffle” List the first 10 songs Tag 10 people

1. Avicii – Hey Brother 2. Nothing’s Carved In Stone – Spirit Inspiration (Zetsuen no Tempest Opening) 3. Suzanne Vega – The Queen and the Soldier (I’m gonna base an AU on this just you wait) 4. The Cab - Endlessly 5. Blue Stahli – Anti You 6. Ramin Karimloo – Show Me Light (Have I yelled about how much I love him? I love him!!) 7. All Time Low – Cinderblock Garden 8. Genesis – Follow You Follow Me (I have no regrets, love me some 80s Phil Collins) 9. Ayumi Hamazaki – Dearest (Inuyasha Ending) 10. Nightmare – Sekai Wo (Death Note Opening)

5. Tagged again by @ghost--fox :D THANK YOU!!

A - Age: 21 soon xD B - Biggest fear: not making a difference C - Current time: 2:08pm (this took long omg) D - Drink you last had: I actually bought a fresh coconut and drank it :0 (my allergies are like “uhm girl that was a bad choice” but tbh it was worth it) E - Every day starts with: Removing my retainer and taking my allergy meds F - Favorite song: Empire by Of Monsters and Men and Invincible by Hedley G - Ghosts, are they real: Idk fam H - Hometown: Munich I - In love with: being inspired & motivated?? it’s the BEST?? J - Jealous of: healthy people K - Killed someone: couldn’t even if I wanted to L - Last time you cried: Out of frustration in December M - Middle name: Johanna (after my grandmother) N - Number of siblings: 4 (3 + an older step-sister I see twice a year) O - One wish: Stop using religion as an excuse for hate crimes P - Person you last called/texted: My dad/my friend Nina respectively Q - Questions you’re always asked: Can you chill? / Can you drive me to [place]? / How’s it going with your thesis? - pls But also: Are you doing okay? / Do you need me to listen? / Sing with me? – YES THANK YOU R - Reasons to smile: Fanfiction and fanart exists. Hot chocolate, tea and fluffy blankets. Music, Art, Books, Stories. Stars & the sky. Brilliant people are making brilliant things every day. A small act of kindness from you to a stranger can make all the difference. S - Song last sang: The Lasset uns nicht zerteilen chorus from Bach’s Johannespassion in my singing lesson (in preparation for our next choir concert), and then assorted Hamilton songs on my drive home xD T - Time you woke up: 7am U - Underwear color: dark blue V- Vacation destination: Cities w/ lots of art & culture :D W - Worst habit: biting my fingernails & cuticles I HATE MYSELF X - X-rays you’ve had: lots for my teeth (wrecked a tooth and used to have braces also), one for my knee after a hiking accident Y - Your favorite food: lasagna (w/ meat or spinach honestly I like both a lot) Z - Zodiac sign: Pisces

...and lastly, 6. Tagged by  @missellaineous (this is also super old I apologize but I liked your questions so :D - feel free to do any of the other tags if you want xD)

1. What can’t you sleep without? My phone. Literally I use it as an alarm clock xD 2. What are your favorite kind of socks? :0 I like big fluffy warm ones – and also I like skiing socks because they fit really tightly and they’re also super warm xD 3. What’s your favorite snack/meal/drink? Atm I am very weak for cookies (I have… phases. At one point I ate so many gummy bears that now I just cannot), my favorite food is lasagna and my favorite drink is water or tea (no milk, no sugar, I dislike sweet drinks except if it’s hot chocolate xD) 4. What’s your favorite kind of weather? …do you know the artist Yuumei? A lot of her pictures have spectacular skies that are like… the sun breaking through dark clouds after a storm? That. That’s my favorite weather. It’s so… motivational and  hopeful? Idk, but I love it. 5. What do you like to listen to/do to relax and feel better when you’re upset? I love the songs from musicals because they’re great to sing along to and singing always improves my mood :D I have endless love for Les Mis, Phantom of the Opera and Hamilton atm. Also what always helps me is, in my mom’s words, to “talk to someone who doesn’t hate you”. Because I tend to hate on myself a lot when I’m upset (for not being better, happier, healthier, enough) and it helps to talk to my friends, who objectively don’t think I’m as awful as I tend to think I am ^^ And they’re all really kind and understanding (and/or blunt when I need someone to tell me to snap out of it). 6. What’s your favorite store to shop at? HOO BOY ok I love bookstores (because duh, books) and lately I’ve also been loving Muji a lot? xD Also we have an art supply chain here in Germany that has GREAT STUFF and I always go overboard xD 7. What color do you wear the most? Black probably, but that’s because most of my pants/leggings are black. Other than that I own a lot of blue and also a lot of red, esp. dresses :D 8. What’s your favorite (video/board/social/party) game to play? That’s hard?? I don’t play a lot of video games but I absolutely adored Undertale. Funnily enough we play card & board games a lot when we meet with my old friends from school, but tbh I don’t have a favorite. I recently learned how to play Skat, which is really enjoyable? (Google tells me apparently that’s mainly a German thing, ok.) And, eh, I’m not a big fan of parties & party games ^^ 9. Any guilty pleasures? When I have time, I watch objectively bad or cliché anime and write commentary xD Also I spend way too much time playing The Sims if I’m totally honest... and scrolling through my dash. Damn. 10. If you could go anywhere (in real life or in fiction), where would it be? Or fiction??? HOGWARTS?!?! Teach me all the magic pls?! …ok but for real though I would love to visit some of my online friends :’)

Alright that’s it, thank you all again and sorry I’m slow and this is a huge post full of way too much information, I’m gonna let myself out now

[thecoroutfitters]

Written by Guest Contributor on The Prepper Journal.

Editors Note: A guest contribution from Evan Michaels at Know Prepare Survive to The Prepper Journal. And a Happy and Safe Veteran’s Day to all who have served, to those that currently serve and their loved ones who make their service possible with their love and support.

As always, if you have information for Preppers that you would like to share and possibly receive a $25 cash award as well as be entered into the Prepper Writing Contest with a chance to win one of three Amazon Gift Cards  with the top prize being a $300 card to purchase your own prepping supplies, enter today.

There’s something raw and primitive about hunting. It takes us back to our roots.  

I am not a fisherman. Or a doctor. Or a very good listener. Where was I going with that…

Right, fishing.

The closest I have ever been to catching a fish with a rod and reel was hooking a bat that decided to investigate my bait as I cast the line.

That is not to say that I have never eaten fish I caught myself.

I once caught a fish with a spear that I made myself. Which is so much more manly than a silly stick and string.

   I know you probably think that I’m some amazing Bear Grylls-esque mountain man that would make Paul Bunyan look like a hipster. And you’d be mostly correct.

But if you want to learn how to make your own spear and hunt prey like an Alpha male (or female, I don’t discriminate) like me, you’ve come to the right place.

What Will You Need?

All you’re going to need to make your very own spear is a straight stick, a knife, and maybe some other stuff.

  The stick is pretty obvious but you DO have a knife, right? Every survivalist should carry a knife with them at all times (except at sporting events and family gatherings).

If you call yourself a survivalist and you find yourself in the woods without a knife, you better have gotten kidnapped and left for dead. Because that’s the only excuse.

The Spear-it Stick

The most exciting method of hunting with a spear is to lash your knife to a branch and make a pokey stick out of it.

You may have a chance of losing your knife if you do this, so be sure to have a spare. If you only have one knife (tsk tsk), I’ll cover what you can do later.

To make a knife-stick, you only need three things:

A knife – You want to use a moderately large knife with a fixed blade, no pocket knives or folding blades.

A branch – The branch should be straight and of reasonable thickness. It should be comfortable to hold and not droop from the weight of the knife, so about 3 inches in diameter and three to five feet long. Hardwood is preferred. Fresh, green wood is not preferred.

Cord or other lashing material – Almost anything will work for this, from paracord to shoelaces to sinew.

How to Make a Hunting Spear/Knife Stick

Step 1. Prepare the branch. You want it to be as straight and smooth as possible, so trim off any bits that stick out and cut down any knots. You may also want to remove the bark. Woof woof.

Step 2. Make a shelf on the branch to hold the knife. Take the end of the wood that will hold the knife, and lay the knife handle against it, with the blade parallel to the wood and pointing away from it (duh). Mark how far down the knife lays on the branch.

 Good Shelf; not so good a knife for this purpose.

Now take your knife and use it to split the end of the wood down the middle. I would recommend batoning, a very useful skill for anyone who wants to use a knife in the woods.

If you are unfamiliar, basically you insert a fixed blade knife into the wood close to the base of the blade, then use a stick or mallet to strike the spine and handle to split the wood apart. Make sure to use a sturdy knife.

Once you reach the marked point, cut into the wood from the outside and break off that half. You should have a more or less L shape in the wood which fits your knife.

Step 3. Place the knife handle into that shelf, then take your cordage and lash the knife to the branch as securely as possible.

Seriously, wrap that sucker tight. If it is loose, it will affect your stabbing skills, you can lose your knife, and you’ll look like a total dweeb.

Congratulations! You have a spear you can use for hunting.

Pro Tip: If your knife starts to get dull after all of this sawing and hacking, you can use your watch band to sharpen it!

Different Spear Types

Primitive Spear

If you only have one knife and don’t want to attach it to the end of a stick, you can create a primitive spear.

That’s right, there’s an even more primitive way to make a spear than just tying a knife to a stick.

Step 1. Instead of creating the shelf and lashing the knife to the branch, you take one end of the branch and whittle it to a sharp point. Carve into the wood towards the tip, away from you.

Like before, you’re going to want to use a sturdy piece a wood that’s relatively straight, about as big around as a shovel handle and as long or longer than a shovel handle. You don’t have a shovel handle, do you? Because that would be perfect.

Step 2. When you’re whittling your spear point, be sure to make the pointy bit at least 6 inches long. Try to make it look like one of those yellow #2 pencils from school, but bigger.

Optional Step 3. For a stronger tip, insert the point under the coals of a campfire and slowly rotate. You do not want to burn the wood, but rather harden it using the heat. It still will not be as sharp as a knife spear and will not last as long, but should still be able to penetrate a deer’s hide.

Boar Spear

Wild pigs can be a good source of food, but they are a fair amount more dangerous than a lot of wild animals. A wounded boar is a vindictive beast, and they will move towards you, pushing the spear through themselves!

To keep the hunter safe, boar spears tend to have a cross brace a little ways below the head of the spear. To make one of these:

Step 1. Make a spear (primitive or knife-stick)

Step 2. Use your knife to create a V shaped notch in the wood of the spear shaft, and a corresponding V shaped notch in a branch of similar thickness (though only about a foot long.)

Step 3. Align the notches and lash the two pieces of wood together. Do not skimp on the cordage, as you want this brace to be strong. Just remember, it’s got to hold an angry wild pig with tusks from goring you. Kind of want to wrap it a little better now, huh?

Now, if you spear a boar and it tries to gore you, the brace will prevent it from getting close.

The brace also has the added advantage of preventing the spear from sticking too far into the animal, so you can pull it out and strike again if necessary.

A boar spear should also be thicker and longer than one made to be thrown.

Pro Tip: If a boar is charging at you, plant the butt of your spear into the ground and aim the pointy end at, you guessed it, the rampaging mutant pig. This will use the boar’s momentum to do all of the hard work of getting the pig on a stick for you and keep you from getting any pesky splinters. Or, you know, getting gored.

Fishing Spear

These spears are shorter and lighter than the other types, as you do not need a long reach or to keep an animal at bay.

Plus, you’re going to miss A LOT so the heavier your spear is, the faster you’re going to tire out.

You can use a lighter version of the primitive spear for this. Same concept, smaller stick.

When hunting with a fishing spear, you wait above the surface of the water, and try to impale fish as they swim under you.

Remember, light refracts as it travels through water. You will have to adjust your aim. Practice poking the spear in the water to learn how you will have to change your aim.

It might be good practice to “spear” underwater rocks. I would, ah, use one of your “mistake spears” for that, though.

Advanced Fishing Spear

Have a little bit more time, or having difficulty fishing with a simple spear? There is a more advanced fishing spear method. Creating it still requires using a knife, but you do not need to attach it to the shaft.

Step 1. Take your branch, and wrap a few inches of cord around, about a foot down from the end of the spear. This will help keep the shaft from splitting.

Step 2. Take your knife, and baton about halfway down to the cord. Remove your knife, now baton perpendicular to the split you created, so you create four points. Go all the way down to a few inches above the cord, then use your knife to baton the other pieces the rest of the way.

Step 3. Now take two twigs, about the size of your pinky and a little longer than the branch is wide, and jam them down between the split pieces of the wood so they splay out. Secure them in place with the cord.

Step 4. Now take your knife and carve sharp tips into the four points. With four times the tips, you are more likely to spear that fish!

Hunting with a Spear

There are two basic ways of hunting with a spear. They are similar to hunting with other weapons, but you have to get closer. These methods are stalking and still hunting.

Stalking is when you sneak up close to the animal. When using a spear, you have to get very close. This is easier with boar than with deer, especially during the heat of the day when the pigs are trying to cool themselves, but is still not easy.

 Shovel handle with a milled blade.

Still hunting is when you lay in wait for the prey to come to you. Learn where the deer trails are and lay in wait upwind of them so your stink doesn’t scare off the prey. That’s also good dating advice.

Hiding in a tree close to a deer trail may be a good idea as well, as deer have a tendency to not look for predators above them. The downside then is that you have a harder time striking at their vital organs.

No matter whether you are stalking or still hunting, there are also two ways you can use to strike your prey. Lunging with the spear is effective, and allows you to strike again if you miss or need to, but requires you to be VERY close.

Throwing your spear naturally lets you attack from a longer range, but if you miss then you will not have a second chance. Plus you just threw your weapon away, which is a bad idea if you face something which fights back, like boar.

To practice throwing your spear, create a second primitive spear and throw that one until you are comfortable.

Could you stalk or ambush prey with a just a knife, without a spear? Sure, it is possible. But it will be much more difficult and more dangerous. The shaft of the spear increases not only your reach but also your leverage, making the weapon much more effective.

So if you decide to hunt boar with just a knife, take out life insurance, write your will, have someone hold your beer, and send me the video.

Author Bio (unedited)

Evan Michaels is a jerk. He generally enjoys playing with fire, running with sharp objects, and watching SEC football. He also writes for Know Prepare Survive with some other jerks. You’d probably like it. (Editors Comment: How many times can YOU watch Alabama football?)

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[fntstory-blog]

Jaws of Neptune (part VIII)

 In which there is a calm before the storm | chapter I | pt i | pt ii | pt iii | pt iv | pt v | pt vi | pt vii

Haru’s dreams were strange that night. He dreamt of broken teeth and tempests and the haunting, unseeing eyes of the Vodacce Fate Witch. When he awoke, it was to a pounding on his door and Mr. Beckett’s voice coming from the other side.

“Rise, if you please, Mr. Haru! I run a tight ship!” Hard wooden soles shuffled outside the door, more than like the young lieutenant pacing back and forth. “We’re going up in the rigging, so it’s shoes or nothing!”

Haru rose slowly, though it was still with more speed than he would have demonstrated were he comfortably back home. The alcohol from the night before had his head feeling cotton-stuffed and his throat dry. With some dismay he realized he had fallen asleep fully dressed; a first in his life.

Splashing some water on his face - there was still some in a pitcher from some days before, he couldn’t rightly recall - he pulled his hair up into a topknot and set to answering the door. His ribs still ached, as did his head, but he would work through both.

“Good morning, Mr. Haru,” Beckett said brightly, eyeing his newest charge. “Come along, then.” He began to walk briskly out onto the deck and into the odd silver light. “I do trust you remember some of the knots you were able to untie, because we’ll be tying some today.” A grin broke across his face at the prospect.

Dutifully, Haru followed the lieutenant across the deck, nodding at his question before remembering himself and adding a “Yes, sir.” The words sounded and felt strange; he counted Beckett more a friend than a superior, but it was how things were done here on the Ivory Maiden.

Without much ado, Beckett hopped up into the rigging, pulling himself up as agile as any monkey despite his clunky shoes and woolen uniform. “Come on, then!” He called, spurring Haru on. A few men were sitting atop the smaller mast they ascended; the smallest of the three on the ship. “This is the Mizzen-mast and, like the others, she’s tall to catch the wind!”

At first, Haru’s climbing was slow, painfully so for the more experienced Beckett, but the novice sailor didn’t much relish the thought of escaping a beating death to only do himself in through carelessness. However, as he grew more familiar and comfortable with the precarious perches the ropes presented, his speed and dexterity increased.

Strange as it might have been, Haru found that his time in his daimyo’s court helped in this new task. There he had need to remember not only faces but names and titles, familial connections, enemies and lovers, peculiar interests and eccentric dislikes. This attention and retention of detail served him now in recalling the names of the crew he met as well as the strange names for the ship’s anatomy.

Once they had reached the top of the mast, there was a crossbeam and Haru saw where the ropes on the deck actually lead. It was so much more complex than the Rokugani vessels he had sailed on back home. The two men he sighted were not familiar and Beckett grinned down at him as he made the introductions. “Mr. Haru, this is Swann and MacConnell.”

Swann, a ginger-haired man with small and flinty eyes muttered a greeting. MacConnell, larger than his fellow and sporting a dark beard, wore what appeared to be a skirt and offered a curt nod. “Laddie-buck.”

Swann and MacConnell were greeted with a polite “Good morning” and smile; he was still unsure what the proper protocol was amongst the crew. The captain he knew was greeted with knuckles pressed to the forehead and a deferential ‘sir’, Berek rated low bows and a ‘m’lord.’ But amongst the men, he had witnessed curt nods, hurled insults, and cheerful words; having no real experience amongst the more common elements, it left him slightly off-balance socially.

Over the next few hours, Haru got used to moving around on the net, raising and lowering the sails, and learning where the ropes went to the deck. By the end, his arms and legs ached from holding onto the rope, but much of the mystery of the men’s duties were beginning to unravel.

Pausing in his morning’s work, with Beckett’s leave, Haru turned his attention from sails and ropes and masts and looked out on the water come sky. Though they were far removed from its shores, he could almost believe that any one of Rokugan’s sea demons and spirits lived in these sterling seas.

A series of bells rang and lunch was called for, interrupting his reverie and bringing to light that he must have slept through breakfast. He was informed that he would dining with the lieutenants, a group that weren’t much better than the men. They were all younger, teenagers by and large, their elders having been lost during battles at sea and their time in Rokugan. Lunch was a less formal affair than dinner the previous night and Haru, unfortunately, experienced the food of the common man.

A cut of beef, still somewhat rare and smelling of salt, a serving of nearly wilted vegetables, and a hard roll which, to his horror, contained a weevil. Beckett laughed, pointing with a fork at the invader. “Here, now, you’re evicting him, Mr. Haru!” The lieutenants shared a laugh, only somewhat at his expense.

He took lunch as well instride as he could. Self-conscious not only for his unfamiliarity with the younger men, but also because of what had just transpired between Barrows and himself, Haru did his best to answer the questions put to him. The lieutenants were a friendly, curious bunch and put just as many, if not more, questions to him regarding Rokugan as he had put to Berek and Lannigan the prior evening. The food presented was only partially eaten and, then, only because he knew he needed to eat something to avoid fainting from hunger during the day.

As lunch ended, the bells rung again and everyone fell back to formalities in the face of resumed duties. Each lieutenant filed out of the mess hall, returning abovedecks and to his workcrew. Mr. Beckett approached Haru, a wry smile on his be-freckled face. “I hope lunch wasn’t all that terrifying …”

“I’m not … much accustomed to finding insects in my food, but I think I’ll survive.” The sardonic grin that accompanied his words faded to something more genuine as he added, “Your fellow lieutenants seem a good sort, though …”

“Weevils are a fact of navy life, Mr. Haru, though I do agree that it’s quite distasteful.” Beckett nodded in agreement with his secondary statement. “Aye, they’re fine lads. We’ve grown closer ever since we arrived in your lands. We see each other more … honestly.”

Beckett walked with Haru across the deck and pointed up to the bow of the ship. Captain Hayes and Doctor MacMorgan were there, Hayes with his sketchbook and MacMorgan with a small squeeze-box. “Meeting with the brass, Mr. Haru,” Beckett explained, catching Hayes’ eye and pointed nod. He saluted his captain and took a step back. “We’ve knots to tie when you’re finished!”

Haru stepped forward and, again, wished something could be done for his appearance; barefoot and battered, his clothes now two days old and slept in, hair sloppily tied and just beginning to show new growth, face bruised and sun-pink, he hardly resembled the courtier he still viewed himself to be.

“Captain Hayes, doctor,” he said in greeting, bowing in the habit he maintained. The shadow of a grimace passed over his face as a stab of pain shot through his side and, if he were honest, the awful sound coming from the box in the doctor’s hands.

“Mr. Haru,” Owen smiled, his sketching stopping for cradled in the crook of one arm was a sketchbook and in his opposite hand was a stump of a pencil.

The doctor ceased working his awful instrument as well and waved his patient closer. “Ah, yes, let’s see to those bruises. What a face to make, ser, are you in pain?” He asked, the strange tentacle-like instrument falling off his knee and squawking like several angered gulls as it extended to its full length.

“It’s not so bad, more discomfort than actual pain,” Haru answered, lying in a misplaced effort to protect what remained of his pride as he removed his shirt. “The rest you prescribed has helped.” This, at least, was the truth.

His movements were stiff from rope climbing and damaged ribs, and his cheeks colored slightly at the immodesty of the situation, standing half-naked for all the crew to see. The bruising along his one side had gone ugly in its healing; deep purples fading to sickly yellow-green. The scrapes and cuts along both arms were scabbed over and the worst of them would undoubtably leave scars.

The damage rendered to his face remained a mystery. He hadn’t seen his reflection since before boarding the ship, though tentative touches told him he was healing. Or so he assumed; as of yet, no one had recoiled in horror at the sight of him. The thought of carrying scars forever wounded his lingering vanity, though, but then so did the sight of his red-raw, blistered hands. This voyage, it seemed, was determined to rob him of everything he had once been.

“There’s jaundicing, that’s good,” Doctor MacMorgan said, leaning his bulk forward. He tapped at Haru’s ribs lightly, then his sternum. Arms were raised and lowered, his patient turned ‘round and chin grabbed to better look at the state of his pupils. His examination lingered for a moment over the twin scars in Haru’s breast; arrow wounds, long since healed.

“Theus’ sake, man, he’s not a side of beef,” Hayes objected, frowning as the doctor continued his poking and prodding.

MacMorgan chuckled, “We are all made of meat, good captain; a doctor, it should follow, would make a more than passable butcher.” He reached down to the black satchel by his seat and pulled out a neatly wound length of clean linen bandages. With quick, experienced fingers, he wrapped Haru’s ribs tight and replaced the bandages around his wrist. His expression said that was healing well, too.

Owen tsked, standing just that much closer to Haru, as if to support him with his presence. “It isn’t anything to -“

The doctor held up a hand. “Nothing to worry about.” He cleared his throat, giving his patient a pointed look. “It will do no good to lie to a physician, ser, and worse if he is a Highland Marcher like me. I appreciate your stoic nature, but I know better, laddie.”

“You may dress yourself, Mr. Haru. I’ll make it a point to prepare more bandages and perhaps a salve, for the bruising. Ah.” MacMorgan reached into his pocket, coming out with a watch on a chain. He hung it in front of Haru; the front served as a small mirror. “A salve will help with … your face as well.” He smiled apologetically.

Haru gladly slipped his shirt back on and carefully cupped the watch-come-mirror in one hand. Gone was the carefully cultivated complexion, cool fawn always so perfectly accentuated by rich blues, replaced by something more wan, unhealthy. High cheekbones, so prized, now bore blue blossoms where once they had been perfectly palest pink; once pillow soft lips showed cracks and a red line just caught the bottom edge, running to the chin where another bruise bloomed.

It felt silly, stupid, petty, to be so dismayed by the injuries inflicted. Surely Lannigan didn’t care so much about the state of his nose. But then the sailor hadn’t been born into a family, a clan, that prided itself so deeply on beauty and perfection. He didn’t expect any of the Thean crew to understand, though he suspected Owen would make an effort, so he cleared the disappointment from face, if not mind, and handed MacMorgan back his time piece.

“Thank you, doctor. I appreciate all your ministrations; surely, that I am here is testament to your skill …”

The doctor replaced his pocketwatch into his vest - and the flash of a silver flask could be seen as he moved his coat - and he nodded. “Quite welcome, Mr. Haru.” He cleared his throat and reseated the spectacles on his nose, uncomfortable with the high praise. “Well, I do try my best …”

Perhaps because he saw something of that sadness and disappointment in his lover’s expression, Owen passed along the sketchbook he had been working in. Prominent on the page were a self portrait of the captain and a portrait of the doctor. In one corner, though, a hidden detail could be picked out: Haru climbing the rigging with Beckett a step or two above him.

“When will I have this chance again?” He asked with a sly smile.

Haru met the captain’s smile with his own, murmuring, “I would sit for something closer if you wished …” as he handed the book back to its owner.

“We can make a night of it, Mr. Haru,” Owen promised.

Doctor MacMorgan, happily oblivious to his captain and patient’s flirtations, hefted his strange instrument once more and began to play it; he hit several sour notes. “It drives Lord Berek MAD,” he grinned ferally, relishing the reclusive lord’s dislike.

Haru’s expression shifted from coy to one of polite interest as he looked to the doctor. Biting back a wince and grimace the thing’s atrocious noises aroused within him, he forced his smile wider saying, “Ahh, yes, I can see that such a unqiue instrument would not be … appreciated by just anyone …”

“Aye, well, a surgeon I may be, but I can never seem to tune my oldest friend.” The doctor the instrument and buckled it together with a clever arrangement of straps. “A pity; once it was a raiser of spirits and entertainment. Now it’s been relegated to my petty revenge on that — that —“ He glanced up to the captain and cleared his throat once more. “Lord Berek.”