#and i get that it's probably more convenient then saying 'mom and step dad' but i like the wholesomeness vibes
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thirteendaysintaunton · 2 years ago
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something about percy referring to paul blofis as 'my parents' in tlo really does something to me and by something I mean brings tears to my eyes
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ikeucity · 1 month ago
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𝗣𝗘𝗘𝗣𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗧𝗢𝗠. — (정원)
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pairing. stepbrother!jungwon x reader (ft. mystery enha member x reader) word count. 54k
warning. contains themes of heavy slow-burn plot, dubious consent (dubcon), non-consensual voyeurism, emotional manipulation, degradation, humiliation, gaslighting, manipulation, step-sibling incest, intense power dynamics, possessiveness, obsession, rough sex, cheating, spying, mentions of bodily fluids, alcohol use, mild coercion, dark themes, and explicit sexual content (18+). mdni.
living with jungwon has always been easy—sure, he's lazy, sure, he doesn’t have a job, but you loved your stepbrother anyway. but when someone else steps into your life, threatening the peace he's fought to keep, you start to wonder just how far jungwon will go to protect the life he's built around you... and what he's willing to do to keep it that way.
co-written with @jaeyunsmochi she helped me with this, and i cannot thank her enough for all her input.
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families were supposed to come together out of love, not convenience. that’s what you used to believe, anyway. after your dad passed and your mom remarried, everything changed. it wasn’t just grief anymore; suddenly, you had this new family dropped into your life, and you were expected to accept it. just like that. jungwon came into your life when you were both barely teenagers, awkward and trying to figure out how to exist in a world that felt like it was constantly shifting under your feet. back then, he was more like a shadow than anything else. always there, but never in your way. he’d hover near your bedroom door, quiet, not saying much, but his presence was always... there. comforting, in a strange way. he was clingy, yeah, but you didn’t mind it. he’d tag along after school, sitting beside you on the couch, waiting for you to pick the show. you’d flick his forehead when he said something dumb, and he’d laugh, wide-eyed and innocent, like everything was easy. and back then? it was. you didn’t think much of it. jungwon was just your stepbrother. harmless. you even joked about it with your friends sometimes, saying he was too attached. but it was no big deal—just the way things were. that was then. now, it’s different. you’re not sure when it happened, but somewhere along the way, jungwon stopped being the awkward kid who hung around doorways. he grew up. and so did you. you didn’t notice it right away, probably because you were too wrapped up in your own life—dating, college, figuring yourself out. but recently... you’ve felt the changes. the air feels heavier between you now. jungwon’s not that scrawny boy anymore. he’s taller, broader, his shoulders filling out his clothes in a way that’s impossible to ignore. there’s a quiet confidence in him now that wasn’t there before. when he passes by in the hallway, there’s this tension. something new. your mom even points out how the neighborhood girls are always trying to get his attention, but he never seems interested. and that’s the thing—he doesn’t seem interested in anyone. not in the way you’d expect. at first, you thought maybe he was just focused on school. maybe even... gay. for a while, you were convinced of it. but then, you remembered the stuff you’d accidentally seen—his porn history popping up on the family computer a few times said otherwise. okay, so... he definitely wasn't gay. threesomes, bdsm, no other dicks included, some other kinky stuff, hell even stepsister porn. you teased him about it when you caught him, his face turning red as he slammed the laptop shut. back then, you laughed it off. just teenage boy stuff, right? but now, it's like you’re seeing him through a different lens. it’s not just jungwon, though. jake and sunghoon, his best friends, grew up too. they came into the picture a few years after jungwon, and back then, they were dorky, awkward, always cracking dumb jokes and geeking out over games. they were like brothers to you, in a way. except jungwon, but that was always a different story. now, they’re not those awkward kids anymore. jake’s taller, leaner, and those messy curls that once made him look boyish now make girls turn their heads. sunghoon traded in his glasses for contacts, hit the gym, and suddenly he’s got this bad-boy charm that leaves girls staring.
watching them change from the boys you knew into confident men—men who now tower over you—it’s weird. it’s like you missed the transition, and now you’re left catching up. you’d always been the big sister figure, offering advice, guiding them through awkward phases. but now, they look at you differently too. you feel it. jake’s compliments linger a little longer, sunghoon’s teasing has this edge to it, flirty, suggestive. they don’t cross any lines, but the dynamic has clearly shifted. you’re not sure how to handle it. but, as always, you had to grow up faster than they did. when you graduated, your mom and stepdad left the flat to you and jungwon. just the two of you again, trying to figure out adulthood. you’d drifted apart during those college years—he found his group, you focused on boys, academics, trying to figure out who you were. but now, somehow, you’ve drifted back together. maybe it’s because you’re both older now, more mature. living with jungwon feels... natural. comforting, even. but at the same time, it’s not easy anymore. not when you see him like this—strong, confident. not when you feel this attraction building up inside you. and it’s not just his appearance. it’s the way he’s always around. not in a clingy way like before, but always choosing to be near you. it makes you wonder if it’s just out of convenience or if maybe... maybe he feels it too. that pull. that connection. you love him, of course you do. he’s your stepbrother. but these feelings... they’re twisted, wrong. and you keep telling yourself they’ll pass. that it’s just some messed-up phase. but the more time you spend alone with him in the apartment, the more the tension builds, pulling you toward something you know you shouldn’t want.
but you can’t shake it. your love life isn’t helping either. after years of failed relationships—guys who got bored or cheated—you’ve started to wonder if maybe the problem is you. are you not enough? you’ve vented to jake and sunghoon about it, and they always tell you the same thing—you’re beautiful, smart, any guy would be lucky to have you. but their words don’t ease the loneliness. and then, there’s jungwon. you can’t help but compare every guy to him. none of them measure up to his quiet strength, his presence. it’s driving you insane, and you know using him as a standard is wrong. but you can’t stop. he’s still attached to you. not like before, but he’s always there. and sometimes, you wonder if it’s out of convenience, because he just doesn't want to be bothered paying rent, or if he feels it too—that pull. whatever it is, it’s messing with your head. you’ve tried to distract yourself, but with your job draining you and no real outlet, it’s impossible. the flat feels more like his than yours—sleek, minimal, no warmth. it’s functional. just like him. but hey, it worked. your mornings are always the same. you stumble out of bed, hair a mess, half-asleep, and drag yourself to the kitchen for caffeine. and there he is, already on the couch, headset on, yelling into his mic like it’s the end of the world. his voice is the first thing you hear, every single day—not the birds outside, not the traffic. just him. “jake, for fuck’s sake, move!” jungwon’s voice cut through the quiet of the flat, his fingers mashing at the controller. you stood at the kitchen counter, pouring cereal into a bowl, your eyes drifting to where he sat on the couch. he leaned forward, whole body tense, muscles shifting under his skin every time his hands tightened on the controller. veins popped out on his forearms, and his focus was locked in, jaw clenched. his hair was a damp mess from his shower, still tousled and drying. jungwon’s bare back, smooth and broad, contrasted against the dark, worn leather of the couch he spent most of his time on. as usual, he was shirtless, lounging in a pair of low-hanging grey boxers. it was a constant reminder of how much had changed. he wasn’t the lanky stepbrother who used to hover by your door anymore—jungwon was all grown up, and you noticed every inch of it. “can you keep it down?” you called, half-exasperated, setting your bowl on the counter as you reached for the milk. he didn’t look at you, muttering under his breath, clearly more invested in his game than acknowledging your presence. you could hear jake’s voice muffled through the headset, followed by sunghoon’s laughter. “jesus,” you muttered, rolling your eyes. grabbing your bowl, you wandered over to the couch and sat next to him, closer than you needed to be, leaning in just enough to be in his space. his shoulder brushed against yours, but he didn’t even flinch, eyes still glued to the screen. you nudged him with your elbow, a grin tugging at your lips. “wanna share the screen? looks like you’re losing.” he swatted at you lazily, not breaking his focus. “can you not?” he grumbled, frustration obvious in his voice as gunfire crackled through his headset.
jake’s voice came through, amused. “dude, is that y/n again?” “yep,” sunghoon added with a laugh. “tell her to fuck off before we lose.” “i’m not doing anything,” you smirked, crunching obnoxiously on a spoonful of cereal. “just enjoying my breakfast.” jungwon shot you a quick glare, his brow furrowed, and you couldn’t help but find it a little endearing. he acted annoyed, but this was your thing. pestering him was fun, and deep down, you knew he liked it. even if he’d never admit it. you shifted beside him, your shorts riding up slightly, which caught his attention for a split second. his eyes flicked down to your legs, a quick glance, but you didn’t notice. he clenched the controller tighter, jaw set as he forced himself to focus on the game. “you’re so annoying,” he muttered, but there wasn’t any real bite to it, making you grin wider. leaning into him more, you let your head rest on his shoulder. “can’t help it. you’re just so easy to mess with.” “stop it,” sunghoon’s voice came through the headset again, exasperated. “seriously, let him play. he’s already fucking up.” “i’m not fucking up!” jungwon shot back, defensive, his voice faltering slightly. you snickered under your breath, watching him try to focus despite how close you were. without thinking, you grabbed the controller from his hands, holding it out of his reach. “wanna see if i can do better?” “y/n, come on,” he growled, lunging toward you to snatch it back, but you dodged, grinning like a fool. “admit it, i’m way more fun than this stupid game,” you teased, waving the controller in the air. jungwon leaned in again, his hand brushing against your thigh as he reached for the controller, his fingers circling your wrist in a firm grip. the touch made you freeze for a second. his hand lingered just a bit too long before he pulled away, his face suddenly serious. “just give it back,” he muttered, his voice low, controlled. your heartbeat kicked up, but you handed it back. “jeez, relax.” as he took the controller, his fingers brushed yours, sending a shiver up your arm. for a moment, the air felt heavy, charged with something you didn’t want to think too much about. “you’re stronger than you look,” you said quietly, more to break the silence than anything. he didn’t look at you, just smirked slightly, still focused on the game. “you’re just weaker than you think.” “fuck off,” you laughed, though your mind lingered on how easily he could’ve overpowered you if he wanted to. snap out of it, y/n. sunghoon’s voice cut through the headset again. “about time she let go of the controller. man, you’re way too soft on her.”
jake chimed in, laughing. “if i had a sister, she wouldn’t even get near my stuff.” you rolled your eyes, chuckling as you grabbed your phone off the coffee table. a text from your boss flashed on the screen. jay from seattle will be at the office by noon. show him around. “ugh, i forgot i have to babysit some new guy at work today,” you groaned, slumping back down next to jungwon. “already tired of annoying me?” jungwon asked, glancing at you as his character respawned. “i was supposed to have the day off,” you sighed dramatically. “now i have to play tour guide for some guy named jay. transferred from seattle. sounds like a blast.” the volume of the game was loud enough that you could hear jake and sunghoon laughing. “maybe jay’s hot,” jake teased. “seattle guys have that brooding, rugged thing going on, right?” you snorted. “yeah, right. knowing my luck, he’s probably some middle-aged dude with bad breath who smells like stale coffee and has a comb-over.” “or,” jake continued, “he could be exactly what you need. you’ve been working non-stop. loosen up a bit.” jungwon glanced at you, his expression unreadable. “you wouldn’t know what to do with him even if he was hot.” your eyebrow shot up at the slight challenge in his voice. “oh, really?” he didn’t look away this time, a faint smirk tugging at his lips. “you’re too uptight. all you do is work.” “i’m not uptight,” you shot back, crossing your arms. “i just have my shit together. someone has to feed your lazy ass.” jake and sunghoon’s laughter rang through the headset, but jungwon didn’t smile. instead, he shrugged, his tone softer. “nothing’s gonna happen with this jay guy.”
you blinked, caught off guard by his sudden seriousness. “and how would you know?” he didn’t answer, focusing back on the screen, his fingers pressing the buttons a little too aggressively. as you stood up to head back to your room, jungwon’s phone lit up on the coffee table, vibrating softly. you leaned forward, trying to catch a glimpse of the name on the screen, but jungwon noticed, flipping it over quickly. “what’s that about?” you asked, narrowing your eyes at him. “none of your business,” he muttered, keeping his gaze fixed on the TV, his voice tight. your jaw dropped as you turned to jungwon. “wait, you’re seeing someone?” jungwon sighed, clearly irritated. “they’re exaggerating. it’s nothing." “nothing?” sunghoon’s voice broke through the headset, laughter lacing his tone. “pretty sure she’s been over a few times, man.” you stared at jungwon, genuinely taken aback. he’s been seeing someone and didn’t tell me? you thought you were close. close enough that if there was someone new in his life—someone he was bringing over to the flat—you’d be the first to know. but no, he kept it to himself. a pang of something settled in your chest, annoyance creeping up at how easily he brushed it off like it was no big deal. what else has he been hiding? sure, you and him had your boundaries, but he told you everything. or so you thought. “you’ve been seeing someone and didn’t tell me?” you asked, your voice betraying the slight sting of being left in the dark. jungwon’s face flushed just the tiniest bit, and you noticed how his eyes narrowed, defensive. “it’s not like that. it’s… not serious.”
not serious? you couldn’t stop the thoughts from spiraling a little. so she’s been here more than once? this wasn’t just a random hookup. there was someone coming over, sleeping in the same flat, and you had no idea. “wow,” you muttered, trying to process the information. “and here i thought you barely left the house.” jungwon rubbed the back of his neck, visibly uncomfortable. “she comes over sometimes. it’s no big deal.” no big deal, huh? something in you couldn’t help but feel annoyed. it was stupid, but maybe part of you expected to be more in the loop with him, to know when things changed like this. and damn, if he was seeing someone, that girl was hella lucky. your eyes flicked to jungwon’s frame, you could just picture it—jungwon fucking someone into the mattress. he could probably break a girl apart, the way his body moved, the way he stayed composed even when his temper flared. fuck, why were you even thinking about this?
the thought made your stomach turn with a weird mixture of disgust and guilt, your mind snapping back to reality. what the hell, y/n? that’s your stepbrother you’re thinking about, for fuck’s sake. you leaned back, arms crossing over your chest as you tried to shake the lingering thoughts. “well, i’m happy for you. about time you found someone. maybe now you’ll stop being so moody all the time.” “piss off, y/n,” he muttered, but the way he said it lacked the usual bite. you grinned, moving a little closer, determined to push his buttons just a bit more. “i’d love to meet her, though. see what kind of girl puts up with you.” jungwon’s entire expression shifted, his jaw tightening as he shot you a sharp glance. “not happening.” your smile faded slightly. “why not?” “because it’s nothing,” he snapped, a little more forceful this time. his eyes flicked away from yours, the tension in his voice unmistakable. you raised your hands in surrender, laughing lightly to break the tension. “alright, alright. i’ll drop it. for now.”
as you stood up to head back to your room, that strange unease in your chest lingered, creeping up your spine like something wasn’t quite right. just as you reached the hallway, your phone buzzed again. a message from your boss—jay is on his way. you groaned softly, already feeling the weight of the day pressing down on you. "looks like jay’s gonna be here sooner than i thought," you muttered mostly to yourself, dreading the responsibility that came with showing him around. you weren’t in the mood for it, not today. jungwon paused the game, glancing at you over his shoulder, hearing jake and sunghoon still shouting through the headset. he ignored them, focusing on you instead, eyes narrowing just a bit, “you don’t have to do it, you know.” you turned to him, confused by his sudden comment. "what? of course, i do. it’s my job." he shrugged, leaning back against the couch, "you’re always working. you don’t have to take on everything. they can find someone else to do it." you raised an eyebrow, catching the subtle edge in his voice, something almost too quick, too dismissive. since when did he care about my workload?
"since when do you care about how much I work?" you asked, half-joking but genuinely curious. "i don’t," he muttered, his words coming out a little too fast, his attention flicking back to the game, fingers tightening on the controller. "just... you never take a break. let someone else handle the boring shit for once.” what the hell was that about? you let out a soft laugh, shaking your head. "yeah, well, someone’s gotta pay for this flat and feed you." “i can take care of myself,” he grumbled, but there was something off about the way he said it. like he was trying to convince himself more than you, the usual sharpness in his voice missing. "really?" you teased, leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed. "you? mr. video game addict who barely leaves the house unless it’s with jake and sunghoon?" he scoffed, but it sounded forced. "i go out," he snapped, though the defensiveness in his tone only made you laugh more. it was like he couldn’t handle the thought of you not taking him seriously.
"oh, right. to jog. very social of you," you shot back, smirking, trying to lighten the weird tension that had settled between you. “i said, i can take care of myself,” he repeated, his voice quieter this time, almost like he didn’t fully believe it. his eyes flickered up to meet yours for a split second before he quickly looked away, pretending to focus back on the game. you smirked, pushing off the doorframe, but the unease in your chest only grew. “sure, you can.” what was his problem? there was something about the way he brushed off the conversation, acting so casual but clearly irritated by something. the mention of jay? was that what was getting under his skin? but why would that even bother him? you shook your head, trying to dismiss the thought. jungwon was just being… well, jungwon. moody, defensive, sometimes hard to read. the weight of it followed you, pressing against your thoughts as you tried to focus on the day ahead, already dreading dealing with jay and the endless office bullshit. just what you needed—more distractions when your mind was already a fucking mess.
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you pulled into the office parking lot, fingers tapping idly on the steering wheel as some random song played in the background. you weren’t even listening—your mind was too busy spiraling with thoughts about the day ahead. how the hell are you going to explain to jay just how toxic this place is? the office politics alone could suck the life out of anyone, and your boss? well, he was a nightmare. you didn’t exactly envy jay, but then again, you didn’t even know what kind of person he was yet. as you scanned the parking lot, your eyes landed on a man standing awkwardly near the entrance, briefcase in hand, looking painfully out of place. he looked like someone who got lost on his way to a corporate halloween party. really, universe? did it have to be the middle-aged guy with the briefcase? you sighed and pulled up closer, rolling down your window. “jay?” you called out. he looked at you, utterly confused, his face blank like he had no idea what you were talking about. this can’t be him, right? “uh, mr. park sent me to show you around?” you added, trying to make sense of the situation. “i’m y/n—” before you could finish, a head popped into view at your window, making you jump in your seat, heart racing as your eyes snapped to the figure now crouched by your car. “looking for me?” and there he was—the real jay. fuck. tall, devastatingly handsome, wearing a suit so perfect you were pretty sure it cost more than your rent. his hair was slicked back, his jawline sharp enough to cut glass, and that smile—god, that smile—lit up his face like he knew exactly how good he looked. it took everything in you not to openly gawk at him. this guy wasn’t just hot—he was jaw-droppingly, heart-racing, take-your-breath-away kind of attractive. and just to top it off, he smelled incredible, like cedarwood, spice, and something else you couldn’t place but was definitely dangerous.
your heart raced, and it felt like you were back in high school, locking eyes with your crush for the first time. and the way he looked at you, all confidence and charm, didn’t fucking help. you swallow thickly as your brain short-circuited for a second. doing your best to mask the shock—and the blatant gawking—as you extended your hand to shake his. but then you realized, oh, right, he was crouched down, his face level with your car window, meaning there was no way he could actually reach you from there. he raised an eyebrow, amusement dancing in his eyes. “we doing handshakes from inside the car now?”
you felt your cheeks heat up slightly, embarrassed by how thrown off you were. “uh, no, i—” you pulled your hand back awkwardly, trying to regain your composure. “i just wasn’t expecting… well, you.” he grinned, clearly enjoying how flustered you were. “and what exactly were you expecting?” you gestured toward the poor guy standing a few feet behind him, still clutching his briefcase. “not… not you.” jay glanced over his shoulder at the guy, chuckling. “oh, him?” he laughed, the sound deep and smooth, sending a shiver down your spine. “nah, that’s the temp. he’s just helping out while i get settled.” right. of course. because why would the universe make this easy for you? he straightened up, giving you a full view of just how tall he really was. damn, the guy was built like a dream. he adjusted his suit jacket, flashing you another one of those infuriatingly perfect smiles. “so, you’re my guide for the day?” you nodded, finally getting a grip on yourself. “yeah, i’ll be showing you around, introducing you to the team, that sort of thing.” “sounds fun,” he replied, his eyes lingering on you a little longer than necessary. he stepped back from the car, giving you room to get out. you took a breath, trying to shake off the sudden nerves. he’s just a colleague, y/n. stop acting like you’re on a damn date. you got out of the car, smoothing your clothes down, doing your best to stay professional. but when you looked up again, jay was still watching you, his gaze following your movements a little too closely.
there was something about him that made it impossible to stay indifferent. confident, sure, but also playful in a way that got under your skin. like he knew exactly what he was doing. “lead the way, then,” he said with a nod toward the building. you nodded back, fighting off the flutter in your chest as you turned on your heel and headed toward the entrance. get it together, y/n. there were more important things to focus on—like how to warn jay about the office and your boss’s ridiculous expectations. the last thing you needed was a crush. especially on someone like him. as you made your way through the doors, you mentally prepared yourself for the day ahead. you needed to focus on work, not on how good jay looked in that suit or how his presence seemed to linger around you like gravity. jay fell into step beside you, casual and relaxed. “so, y/n,” he started, his voice smooth, “how bad is it working here?” you gave him a half-smile. “oh, you have no idea.” leading him through the maze of cubicles and conference rooms, it was impossible not to notice the way people stared at jay as you passed. it wasn’t just you—everyone noticed him. how could they not? jay didn’t just walk into a room, he commanded it. and the way he made small talk with your coworkers, that smile lighting up his face—it was like he had everyone hooked.
you gave him the usual tour: break room, copy room, the stash of good coffee you stole from your boss’s private stock, and the dreaded hr department, notorious for all the wrong reasons. jay nodded along, paying attention, but you could feel his eyes on you more often than not. by the time you made it to the lounge area, you were ready for a break, not because the tour was tiring, but because being around jay was exhausting in a whole other way. “this is where we hide when the boss is breathing down our necks,” you said, gesturing to the snack station. “snacks, coffee, all the essentials. we can take a break before i show you the rest.” jay chuckled, leaning against the counter with that annoyingly perfect posture. “i've gotta say, this place isn't so bad. you made it sound like a war zone.” you shrugged, reaching for a granola bar. “it’s not the place—it’s the people. management, especially. if you last a week, i’ll be impressed.” he raised an eyebrow, smirking. “that bad, huh?”
you tore open the wrapper, taking a bite. “you don’t know the half of it. the boss is a control freak, expects us to be mind readers.” jay laughed, grabbing a snack for himself, eyes still on you. “good thing i’m good at reading people then.” you felt your cheeks heat up slightly at the way his gaze lingered. yep, definitely flirting. “yeah? how’s that working out for you so far?” you shot back, trying to keep things light but he grinned, leaning a little closer. “i’d say i’m getting the hang of it.” what the hell, jay? maybe it was just you overthinking, but the way he keeps on leaning a closer? god, he needed to stop acting like he fucking wants you or you'd completely lose it. “so,” jay continued, unwrapping his snack, “what keeps someone like you in a place like this?” you laughed softly, leaning against the counter. “honestly? it pays the bills, and i haven’t found anything better yet. you learn how to survive.”
jay watched you for a moment, his gaze almost too intense. “maybe you just haven’t found the right opportunity to leave yet.” there was something in the way he said it, something that made you feel like he was offering more than just advice. “maybe,” you replied, trying to keep your voice steady, though your heart was hammering. jay smiled, taking a slow sip of his drink. “you’re not as uptight as you made yourself sound earlier. you’re pretty laid-back.” you laughed, though your stomach flipped at the unexpected compliment. laid-back? not the words jungwon would use to describe you this morning. “i’ll take that as a compliment,” you said, trying to sound casual. jay hummed, his eyes dipping down for a moment before flicking back up to meet yours. there was something almost deliberate in the way he took another slow sip of his drink, like he was savoring it. "it was meant as one. not everyone can pull that off."
jake’s voice from earlier played on a loop in your head: maybe he’s exactly what you need. goddammit, jake wasn’t wrong. the way jay moved, the way his words slipped out so easily, it was like he knew exactly how to push your buttons without even trying. but shit, this was work. you couldn’t lose your head over some pretty boy with a killer smile, no matter how damn good he smelled or how dangerously close he was standing. you took a deep breath, trying to calm the pulse racing in your throat. still, your mouth betrayed you. “you’re dangerous, you know that?” the words came out more playful than you intended, a grin tugging at the corners of your lips despite yourself. jay’s smile widened at that, his eyes lighting up with mischief, the air around him practically buzzing. "i’ve been told." oh, fuck. and just like that, you were completely hooked.
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as you closed the office door behind you, glancing at your wristwatch, you realized just how late it had gotten. your heels were killing you, and all you could think about was kicking them off the second you got home. jay walked beside you, his long strides effortlessly keeping pace as you both headed to the parking lot, still chatting about schedules and the mountain of upcoming projects. "so," you said, rubbing your temples, "looks like we’ll be working pretty closely on that new marketing push. i’ll show you the ropes, make sure you don’t drown in all the corporate bullshit." "sounds like i’m in good hands, then." his eyes crinkled at the corners when he smiled, making it impossible not to return the gesture. as you continued walking, the conversation shifted, and jay started opening up more—talking about where he came from. and fuck, was that a surprise. the guy was loaded. not just rich—serious money. the kind that makes you wonder why someone like him would even bother working in a place like this. "so," you said, still trying to process it, "you could probably be running a company by now, right? why take a job here?" jay shrugged, all humble and casual, like it wasn’t a big deal. "i wanted to start from the bottom, you know? understand the employees, the management... see how everything works before i think about building something of my own." you blinked at him, genuinely impressed. who the hell chooses to start from the bottom when they’re sitting on a pile of money? "that’s… honestly, that’s really smart. most people wouldn’t do that." "thanks," he said, smiling warmly. "i like to think i’m in the right place for now." there it was again—that easy charm. it wasn’t just the flirting; it was how natural everything felt with him. the way the conversation flowed effortlessly, like you’d known him forever. and it wasn’t just nice—it was fucking refreshing to talk to someone who didn’t make everything feel like a power play. you glanced at your phone, then cursed under your breath. shit, jungwon. you’d been so wrapped up in the day that you forgot about dinner. and knowing him, he probably hadn’t eaten anything decent since breakfast.
"ugh," you groaned, rubbing your forehead. "i totally forgot, i’ve got a brother to feed." jay raised an eyebrow, a teasing smirk playing on his lips. "younger brother?" you rolled your eyes, half-laughing. "i wish. that would be way easier. no, he’s grown—just incredibly lazy." jay chuckled, shaking his head. "sounds like a handful." "you have no idea," you replied, smirking. "but someone’s gotta take care of him." you both shared a laugh, the walk settling into an easy rhythm again as you made it to your cars. jay leaned against his door, his eyes lingering on you in a way that was... not subtle. there was something magnetic about him, and as much as you tried to keep your cool, it was becoming harder by the second. "well," jay said, pulling his phone from his pocket, "this was easily one of the best tours i’ve ever been on. we should do it again sometime." he flashed that devastating smile, his eyes flicking back up to yours as he scrolled casually on his screen. "can i get your number? you know, in case i get lost tomorrow and need rescuing." god, he’s good. you couldn’t help but laugh, pulling out your phone to exchange numbers with him. "sure. just don’t make a habit of getting lost, though."
he chuckled, tucking his phone away, his gaze still locked on you. "i’ll try my best. thanks for showing me around, y/n." "anytime," you said, feeling lighter as you waved goodbye and headed toward your car. halfway home, you caught yourself still smiling like a fucking idiot. by the time you finally walked through the door of your apartment, juggling bags of jungwon's favorite takeout, you were greeted by the usual sight of jungwon sprawled out on the couch, xbox controller in hand. he glanced up, his eyes immediately landing on the food you were carrying, eyebrows raised. "what’s the occasion?" he asked, eyeing the bags suspiciously. "you only ever get me this when something really good happens." you grinned, setting the food on the table, still riding the high from earlier. "oh, you know... just had a great day at work." jungwon’s eyes narrowed a little, his suspicion deepening. "a great day, huh?" "yup," you said, kicking off your heels and digging into the food. "jay." jungwon leaned back on the couch, trying to look indifferent. "and?"
you let out a dreamy sigh, not even noticing how his eyes sharpened slightly. "he’s amazing. like, seriously. smart, loaded, and so humble. it’s crazy. oh, and did i mention he’s hot? like, really fucking hot." jungwon kept his face neutral, but there was a flicker of something—something dark that you didn’t catch. "sounds... great." you continued gushing, going on about how well you and jay clicked, the subtle flirting, the easy chemistry. "and the best part? we’re gonna be working on a bunch of projects together. i think we’re gonna make a really good team." jungwon stayed quiet, his gaze fixed on the food in front of him. "yeah, well," he finally muttered, his tone clipped, "just don’t get distracted." you paused, mid-bite, raising an eyebrow. "distracted?" jungwon shrugged, his eyes flicking up for the briefest moment before going back to his food. "just saying. you’ve got a lot on your plate already." "i can handle it," you replied, brushing off his comment, "besides, it’s not like anything’s going to happen." but even you didn’t believe that. something’s definitely going to happen. you could feel it. jungwon didn’t respond, just grunted and focused back on the tv, clearly not wanting to continue the conversation. you shrugged it off, too caught up in the day to care.
as you sat on the couch next to him, scrolling through your phone, a familiar ping made you glance down at your screen. a message from jay. instinctively, a smile tugged at your lips, and without thinking, you bit your lip as you read it. jay: hope you’re not too tired from babysitting me all day. thanks again for the tour. promise i won’t get lost tomorrow... but i might just text you anyway ;) goddamn, he was smooth. your smile widened, and before you knew it, you were already typing back. y/n: i’ll be holding you to that ;) don’t leave me hanging. you hit send, feeling a flutter in your chest as you tossed your phone onto the couch. you were smiling like a fucking teenager, and you knew it. but you didn’t care. jungwon, sitting beside you, glanced over. his eyes darted to your phone, then back to your face. "who’s that?" he asked. you shrugged, trying to play it off. "just jay. he’s funny."
jungwon hummed, eyes glued to the tv again, though you could see the way his jaw clenched. "funny, huh?" "yeah, we were just texting about today. nothing big." jungwon stayed silent after that, but you could feel the shift in the air. something was off. maybe it was the way he bristled every time you mentioned jay, or maybe it was how quiet he’d gotten all of a sudden. you brushed it off, your mind too busy replaying your day with jay. but if you had looked up, if you had paid attention, you would’ve seen the way jungwon was staring at you now—intense, almost predatory. his eyes weren’t on the tv anymore. they were fixed on you. and the way you smiled down at your phone, completely unaware, only seemed to fuel something deeper inside him. he didn't even blink. his expression was unreadable, but his gaze... it was burning. if only you had noticed. but you didn’t. you were too busy with jay, too caught up in the thrill of it all to feel the weight of jungwon’s stare.
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a week had passed since then, and jungwon sat on the couch, leg bouncing restlessly, his eyes on the tv but not actually seeing anything. sunghoon and jake’s laughter filled the room, their voices like nails on a chalkboard as they kept making casual comments about you and jay. every joke, every stupid jab about how much jay liked you felt like a fucking knife twisting deeper in his chest. fuck, this is hell. he couldn’t take it. "bet jay’s got it bad for her," sunghoon’s voice cut through the air, making jungwon’s stomach twist, his blood boiling under his skin. his heart pounded in his ears, drowning out everything else. all he could focus on was the heat rising in his chest, the way his skin felt too tight. he swallowed hard, trying to keep the rage from spilling out. “i’m going to the bathroom,” he muttered, standing up so fast the remote slipped from his hand and hit the floor with a thud. jake and sunghoon glanced up, surprised, but jungwon didn’t wait for a response. he stormed down the hallway, steps uneven, barely holding it together. when he reached the bathroom, he slammed the door hard enough to echo through the apartment. let them think he needed to cool off or whatever. but the bathroom wasn’t where he was headed. you were still at work. probably with jay. fucking jay. probably talking, laughing, maybe even flirting with him. jungwon’s chest tightened at the thought, his jealousy clawing at him. he couldn’t handle it. he needed a release, needed something to calm the fire burning inside him. so he went to your room.
his hand shook as he reached for the knob, pausing for a second to listen. jake and sunghoon were still laughing, still talking like nothing was wrong. he slipped into your room, closing the door quietly behind him. the second he stepped inside, your scent hit him—sweet, familiar, fucking intoxicating. it wrapped around him, choking him in the best and worst way possible. his chest ached, and for a second, he thought he might actually break. he leaned back against the door, sliding down to the floor, his head falling into his hands. he felt like he was losing his fucking mind. you. it was always you. his heart pounded painfully, each beat a reminder of how fucked up he felt. he could barely breathe, barely think, and yet, the need to be in here—in your space—overpowered everything else. the room was exactly how you left it—clothes scattered across the bed, your hoodie tossed over the chair. but jungwon’s eyes went straight to the shelf facing your bed. that fucking teddy bear.
it wasn’t small either—one of those carnival bears he’d won for you back then. it wasn’t huge, not one of those obnoxiously oversized ones, but big enough. bigger than a normal stuffed animal, definitely enough for you to… do what you did with it. it sat there, innocent to anyone else, untouched, like it hadn’t been moved in months. for anyone else, it was a forgotten toy, frozen in time. but to him? it was everything. it was the key to his obsession. he reached for it, his fingers brushing over the soft fur, his stomach twisting with a mix of guilt and desire. he sat on the edge of your bed, gripping the bear like it was the only thing keeping him sane. how the fuck did it get this bad? he hadn’t meant for things to spiral out of control, but now? now he was too far gone. for a moment, he just sat there, staring at the bear, knowing what he had hidden inside it. knowing the guilt that came with it. it wasn’t just a toy anymore. it was a reminder—of what he was, of everything he had become.
his fingers tightened around 'teddy' as memories hit him, one after the other, like a train barreling through his mind. pulling him deeper into the past. he could never forget that summer, the one after his first year of college. he had come back home, exhausted but fucking relieved to finally get a break from the chaos of school. the months away had been a blur, and honestly? he didn’t think much about you during all that time. you were just his stepsister—at least, that’s the bullshit he kept telling himself. he buried the memories of your pretty smile he grew fond of and how it made him feel, shoved them down deep, thinking that the distance would fix it, that it would kill whatever twisted thing was starting to grow inside him. maybe if he just stayed away long enough, it’d disappear. but when he came back that summer, everything shifted. again. he should’ve walked away, should’ve ignored it. but curiosity clawed at him, dragged him closer, until he was standing in the doorway, peeking inside. and what he saw? it fucked him up.
his breath hitched, heart slamming in his chest, pulse fucking skyrocketing as his eyes locked onto you. holy shit. you were on your bed, but it wasn’t just the sight of you lying there that stopped him cold. no, it was what you were doing. his stomach twisted as he realized what was happening—you were straddling the teddy bear. that bear. the one he’d won for you years ago. but this? this wasn’t innocent, not in the way you used to cuddle it when you were younger. this was different. this was fucking worse. you were grinding your pussy against it, hips rolling in slow, deliberate circles. his breath hitched, his heart slamming in his chest as he watched you, lost in your own pleasure, completely unaware that he was watching. you were wearing nothing but an oversized shirt, the way your pussy rubbed against the soft fabric of the bear, slick and wet. the obscene sounds it made as you humped it—it was like watching some twisted fantasy come to life. except this was real. you were real. and you were right in front of him. you weren’t just humping it. you were fucking it, using it like it was the only thing that could get you off.
jesus fucking christ. his mind screamed at him to look away, to shut the door, to fucking forget this. but his body didn’t listen. eyes glued to you as you rocked your hips faster, he couldn’t stop watching the way your pussy moved, the way you were so lost in it. his throat went dry, hands shaking as he gripped the doorframe. he knew this was wrong. so fucking wrong. but he couldn’t stop. couldn’t fucking stop watching the way your hips moved, the way you were so lost in it. that darkness—the one he thought he had buried—was creeping back in, stronger than ever, twisting his insides, making his cock swell painfully in his pants. fuck. this wasn’t curiosity anymore. this was darker. more dangerous. you weren’t just the awkward teenager he once knew. you were a woman now—a fucking gorgeous woman—and you were doing things that set every buried desire inside him on fire. your movements grew more desperate, hips grinding harder, your hands gripping the bear’s fur tight as you moaned louder, your jaw going slack. jungwon’s chest heaved, his breath shallow as he watched, his own arousal throbbing, making it impossible to think straight.
shit. this wasn’t supposed to happen. he wasn’t supposed to feel like this. not for you. but no matter how hard he fought it, he couldn’t tear his eyes away. jungwon’s mind was a whirlwind of guilt, shame, and overwhelming fucking lust. his cock strained in his pants, rock hard, body betraying him in the worst fucking way possible. he could barely breathe, barely fucking think. all he could do was watch as you came undone on that bear. he had tried to convince himself that going to college would kill this twisted attraction, that the distance would erase it. but standing there, watching you, he knew he was wrong. so fucking wrong. the obsession hadn’t disappeared. it had grown. it had festered and that night? it reignited something in him that he couldn’t control. from that night on, he was no longer the same. he couldn’t stop thinking about you. couldn’t get the image of you humping that bear out of his head. the sound of your moans, the sight of your pussy grinding against that fabric—it haunted him. consumed him. and he knew, watching from a distance wasn’t going to cut it anymore. that’s when the plan started. it didn’t take much. just a little manipulation, some subtle planning. you never noticed. you never did. the bear—the one you fucked so carelessly—became the perfect vessel for his sick curiosity.
he made a small incision in the back, right beneath the soft fur, where it wouldn’t be visible. he slid a tiny camera inside, adjusting the angle, hiding the lens so perfectly behind it's eyes, you would never know. you never did. and from that day forward, he watched you like he was fucking studying you. memorizing every detail. he knew what turned you on, what porn you watched when you thought you were alone, which boyfriends made you scream, which ones you hated and which ones left you wanting more. he saw and heard it all. every. single. moment. this wasn’t some passive hobby anymore. no, everything jungwon did was calculated. planned to perfection. he made sure he was always home, always there, watching. he never left anything to chance. he didn’t even look for a job—couldn’t risk being away for too long. he needed to be there, needed to make sure the camera was charged, that he didn’t miss a single second of you. he told himself it wasn’t obsession, that it was just curiosity. but deep down, he fucking knew better. this was something twisted. and jungwon had built his entire world around you without you ever realizing. he controlled everything. and no one—not even you—would ever figure it out. while you lived your life, thinking everything was normal, jungwon’s mind was always ten steps ahead, planning, thinking. how could he keep you in his grasp without you knowing?
and for years, it worked. you never noticed how he made sure to align his life with yours. how his schedule revolved around you. he made it look natural, casual, like he was just the laid-back stepbrother who didn’t care about shit. but the truth? it was so much darker than that. he knew everything. he snapped out of his memories, his eyes locking onto the bear again. that moment, that fucking night. it haunted him. the memory burned into his mind, twisting his insides like a sickness he couldn’t cure. he stood up, legs shaky, the room suddenly feeling too small, too suffocating. it had all started so small, hadn’t it? he had convinced himself it was innocent. just a way to keep an eye on you, make sure you were safe. that’s what he told himself when he planted the camera in the bear. back when he thought his feelings were still manageable. but that lie had crumbled a long time ago. now, he needed to be close to you in ways that twisted his stomach and filled him with guilt so deep it kept him up at night. jungwon carefully placed the camera back inside the bear, adjusting it until it was in the perfect position. his hands were steady, but inside, he was falling apart. he zipped it up, placing the bear back on the shelf, just like always. no matter how sick it made him, no matter how much he hated himself for this, he couldn’t stop. he needed this. he needed you in ways that fucking terrified him. your room—it was his sanctuary when you weren’t home. the one place he could feel close to you without the crushing weight of being caught. in here, he could pretend, just for a second, that he had a part of you that no one else could touch.
it was so fucked up, and he knew it. but it was like an addiction, a need he couldn’t fucking shake. the guilt gnawed at him, but the need was stronger.
his heart twisted as his mind drifted back to you and jay. what were you two doing right now? the thought of jay touching you, making you laugh, getting close to you in ways jungwon never could—it made him feel like he was going to fucking explode.
you’re just his stepsister. he repeated the thought like a mantra, but the words were hollow, meaningless. that’s what you were supposed to be. that was the role he was supposed to play. jungwon’s mind spiraled, pacing back and forth in your room, his footsteps soft but frantic. it was only a matter of time before jay would be here, touching you, fucking you. and what the fuck was he supposed to do then? sit by and watch through the hidden camera? watch you fall and get fucked by someone else again? probably. fuck. he needed to leave. if he stayed in here any longer, he didn’t know what he’d do. the temptation was already clawing at him, the urge to take something of yours, to steal a piece of you like he had done before. your panties, your scent—he’d stolen them, hid them away like trophies, jerked off to them countless times. but even that wasn’t enough anymore. not now. not with jay in the picture. jay was a fucking threat. jungwon couldn’t stand it, the way you smiled when you talked about him, how your face lit up when you mentioned his name. fuck that. jay was pulling you into a world where jungwon didn’t belong, where he couldn’t follow, and that scared the shit out of him. he was losing control, and it was driving him insane.
the watching, the sneaking, the careful fucking planning—it wasn’t enough anymore. it wasn’t keeping you close. you were slipping through his fingers, the thought of jay taking what was his, getting close to you in ways jungwon could never—fuck, it made him sick. he shot one last look at the bear, the silent witness to his obsession, then stormed out of your room, closing the door behind him with a soft click. his breath was ragged, chest heaving as he leaned against the wall in the hallway. his heart pounded in his chest, a constant reminder of just how fucked up this had become. he couldn’t keep living like this. the watching, the waiting, pretending it would all go away—that was bullshit, and he knew it. this obsession wasn’t something he could just bury anymore. it was eating him alive. one day, watching wouldn’t be enough. the waiting, the creeping around behind your back—it wouldn’t satisfy the darkness inside him. he wanted more. he needed more. and that day was coming sooner than he’d like to admit. jungwon pushed himself off the wall, his legs shaky, mind racing, but even as he stormed down the hall, his thoughts were a jumbled mess, each one more fucked than the last. you were his. you didn’t know it yet, but you were.
jungwon reentered the living room, his footsteps heavier than usual, the weight of the shit storm in his head pulling him down with every step. he tried to shake it off, tried to act normal, but it was like a fucking itch he couldn’t scratch. jake and sunghoon were still slouched on the couch, laughing at some inside joke, barely giving a shit about the movie playing in the background. jungwon forced a grin, slipping into the scene like nothing was wrong. like he wasn’t on the verge of snapping. “what do you think, jungwon?” sunghoon’s voice had that edge to it, like he knew exactly what buttons to push. he always did. “you think jay’s the type to take her home, make breakfast the next morning? maybe throw in some flowers too?”
of course, they were still fucking talking about you. they just couldn't help themselves. jungwon’s chest tightened, but he let out a forced laugh, “yeah, he seems like that kind of guy from what she tells me. real gentleman.” the words felt like they were choking him. he could barely get them out. jake snickered, shaking his head like it was all a fucking joke. “well, at least she picked a decent guy this time.” jungwon’s fingers twitched, every part of him screaming to shut this conversation down, but sunghoon leaned back, smirking like the asshole he was. “please. nice guys like jay? they’re hiding something. i bet he’s got some skeletons in the closet.” jungwon clenched his jaw, forcing himself to breathe. “let her have her fun,” he muttered, his voice tight. “she’ll tell us all about it when she gets back.” his throat burned. “anyway,” he cleared his throat, trying to sound disinterested, like the image of you and jay wasn’t tearing him apart, “fuck this, this movie’s boring as hell.” he grabbed the remote, flipping through channels without even paying attention, just needing something—anything—to drown out the thoughts in his head.
jake and sunghoon didn’t argue, their attention shifting to the tv. but jungwon wasn’t watching. he couldn’t. his mind was far from the room, far from the flashing screen in front of him. his fingers tightened around the remote, knuckles going white, but he didn’t even notice. he hated jay. hated him with every fiber of his being. not because jay was bad. no, that would’ve been easier to deal with. jay wasn’t bad. jay was good. too fucking good. the kind of guy who could give you everything, who’d make you feel safe, who’d make you happy in ways jungwon knew he never could. jungwon hadn’t met him yet, didn’t need to. the way you looked when you talked about him, the way your eyes lit up—that told him everything. jay wasn’t just some guy. he was the kind of threat that jungwon couldn’t fight with fists or anger. jay was the real fucking deal. and if it came down to it—if it came down to losing you completely? jungwon didn’t give a shit about jay. fuck jay. he’d do whatever it fucking took to keep you his.
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jungwon had changed, and jake and sunghoon noticed. how could they not? he was more agitated, easily irritated, barely said a word. he wasn’t the jungwon they were used to—the one who laughed at their dumb jokes, who was always cheerful in his own quiet way. now, he was distant, like he had a constant storm brewing under the surface. and they tried asking him what the fuck was going on, throwing out questions like breadcrumbs, but they knew better than to push too hard. jungwon didn’t like to share shit, especially when it came to whatever was messing with his head. they tried though, casually bringing up the girl jungwon had been seeing. when they asked if it was about her, his response was clipped, a warning wrapped in frustration. “it’s not about her. drop it,” he snapped, and they did. they loved him enough to not push. instead, they did what they could. they showed up, more often than usual, hanging around the flat as much as possible. not enough to make it obvious that they were worried, but enough to remind him they were there. jungwon didn’t tell them to fuck off, which said a lot. normally, when jungwon was fine, he didn’t need their company—he’d barely ask for it. but now? he tolerated it, and that meant he needed them, even if he’d never admit it. the flat buzzed with the usual noise—jake and sunghoon arguing over takeout, the tv humming in the background—but jungwon felt none of it. all he could think about was you, and how the fuck you weren’t home yet. “die hard never gets old,” jake waved his pizza slice like it was some declaration worth fighting over. “perfect movie for a night like this." sunghoon rolled his eyes, slumping further into the couch. “bro, we’ve watched that shit like a hundred times. can we please pick something without bruce fucking willis?” jungwon’s grip tightened on the remote, fingers pressing way too hard into the buttons as he scrolled through movie options, but he wasn’t seeing any of it. his thoughts were on you, and where the hell you were.
“so, is y/n out with her new bestie jay again?” jake asked, grinning as he exaggerated the air quotes around bestie. “she’s been spending a lot of time with him lately, huh?” yeah, jungwon thought bitterly. too much fucking time. “probably,” jungwon muttered, his eyes glued to the tv, even though nothing on the screen registered. his jaw was tight, teeth clenched to the point it felt like one would crack. “they’ve been working on a lot of projects together.” “projects, huh?” sunghoon snorted, sarcasm dripping from every word. “sounds like he’s working on more than just projects.” jake laughed, nudging jungwon with his elbow like this was all one big fucking joke. “yeah, come on, man. you can’t tell me you haven’t noticed how close they’re getting.” jungwon wanted to punch the grin right off his face, but he forced out a dry, humorless laugh instead. “it’s just work,” he said, voice tight, strained, like he was choking on the words. “she’s focused on her career.”
he wanted them to shut the fuck up. every word out of their mouths felt like nails on a chalkboard, scraping against the frayed edges of his control. jake and sunghoon never knew when to quit, always teasing, always pushing. and the more they talked about you and jay, the darker his thoughts got. jake smirked, leaning back like he wasn’t stirring shit. “focused on work? nah, she’s focused on him,” he teased, tossing his pizza crust aside. “i’ve seen the way she smiles when she talks about him. it’s different, bro. you can’t tell me you haven’t noticed.” of course, i’ve fucking noticed. jungwon thought, his insides twisting, but he couldn’t say that. couldn’t admit how much it was killing him. “she’s just happy, okay?” jungwon snapped, the words coming out sharper than he intended. his frustration bled through, cracking the mask he’d been holding up. as soon as the words were out, he regretted them. sunghoon raised an eyebrow at jungwon’s outburst. “damn, man, relax. we’re just messing with you.” jake and sunghoon exchanged a glance—one of those silent, knowing looks that meant they were both thinking the same thing. “dude, what the fuck is wrong with you?” jake finally asked, leaning forward on the couch, his eyes narrowing at jungwon. there was no bite in his tone, just concern. sunghoon, who had been lounging with his feet kicked up, straightened in his seat, nodding in agreement. “yeah, man. is something going on?” jungwon sighed, his grip on the remote loosening as he tried to shake off the weight sitting heavy on his chest. he didn’t want to talk about it—didn’t even know how to—but he could feel their eyes on him, waiting, and for once, he couldn’t just brush it off.
“nothing’s wrong,” he muttered, voice flat, forcing a smile that felt like it could crack his face. “just been tired, you know?” “bullshit,” jake said, calling him out instantly, his eyes narrowing further. “come on, don’t pull that tired card again. we’re not idiots. what’s really going on?” jungwon let out a long, shaky breath, trying to play it off, but it was like a dam about to break. his fingers ran through his hair, tugging slightly as he avoided their stares. “it’s nothing,” he repeated, quieter this time, trying to convince himself more than anyone else. and then sunghoon said it. the thing. “is this about jay?” it was like someone had punched him in the gut, knocking the air from his lungs. his jaw clenched so hard he thought it might snap. jake and sunghoon didn’t say anything for a moment, but that silence said everything.
jake and sunghoon exchanged another look, this time laced with humor—light, teasing. they understood what this was about, but in their usual fashion, they weren’t about to get too serious. “so... you’re jealous,” jake said, grinning like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “yeah,” sunghoon added, “you’re scared jay’s gonna steal her away from you.” jungwon’s lips twitched into a half-hearted smile despite himself. steal her away from me. they made it sound so simple, like it wasn’t this all-consuming thing eating at him day and night. but hearing it put like that, it almost made him feel better. “oh, please,” jake smirked, leaning back into the couch, “as if jay stands a chance when sunghoon and i are here.” sunghoon barked out a laugh, nodding. “exactly. y/n’s just wasting time with him until she realizes we’re the real deal.” “you’re both idiots,” he muttered, shaking his head, but there was a small, genuine smile pulling at his lips now. it wasn’t much, but it was enough to ground him. “so?” jake started, his grin widening, “you want us to sweep y/n off her feet? we could totally make it happen. bet she’d love to be spoiled by us.”
jungwon’s expression darkened for a second, but he played it off with a smirk. hiding how much it really fucked him up inside. “yeah? go ahead. i’d rather you two fuck her than let jay get his hands on her.” the room fell into dead silence. jake and sunghoon both froze, staring at jungwon like he’d just said the most unhinged shit they’d ever heard. their eyes went wide, exchanging glances like they weren’t sure if he was fucking serious or just fucking around. “what the fuck, dude?” jake raised an eyebrow, laughing awkwardly but still trying to figure out if jungwon was for real. “you can’t be serious.”
sunghoon looked just as thrown off, his brows furrowing like he wasn’t sure what to make of the whole situation. “yeah, man, that’s... kind of fucked up.” jungwon just chuckled lowly, leaning back against the couch, acting like it didn’t bother him. “what? you guys haven’t thought about it? with all the shit you say about her?” his eyes flicked between them, sharp, like he was daring them to admit something. jake and sunghoon shifted, clearly uncomfortable, glancing at each other for a second too long. and that was all jungwon needed to know. “come on,” jungwon pressed, narrowing his eyes, “you’re telling me you’ve never thought about fucking her?” sunghoon cleared his throat, his eyes darting away, and jake rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly looking anywhere but at jungwon. “well, i mean... we’ve joked about it,” jake finally muttered, trying to play it off like it wasn’t a big deal, “but we never... you know, took it seriously. she’s your sister, dude.” jungwon laughed, but there was no humor in it. “right.” “yeah, we never actually meant we’d... you know,” sunghoon added, looking like he wanted to crawl out of his own skin.
jungwon’s smirk stayed plastered on his face, but his eyes were dark, and they both knew they’d crossed into territory that felt too fucking dangerous. but jungwon couldn’t stop pushing it. he needed them to feel as fucking uncomfortable as he did. maybe then they'd keep their mouths shut, and for the love of god try not to mention jay. “relax,” he muttered, leaning back again, trying to appear calm. “i know you’re just talk. probably couldn’t handle her anyway.” jake forced a laugh, trying to lighten the mood, but it came out shaky. “yeah, well, maybe she’d eat us alive. guess we’ll never know.”
“yeah,” sunghoon chimed in, trying to keep things from spiraling further, “we’ll leave y/n to the real men, huh?” he gave his friends a half-hearted grin, pretending like their banter had actually lifted his mood. but as the conversation moved on, their laughter filling the room, jungwon stayed silent, his mind spiraling back to the same thought that had been plaguing him for weeks. he just wanted you home. and no amount of jokes or cocky smiles could change that. as he stared at the TV, barely registering the movie playing in front of him, he missed the quick look between jake and sunghoon—a brief exchange of glances, almost like a shared secret. it went unnoticed by jungwon, buried beneath his own frustration, his jealousy too loud to hear anything else.
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the frustration still buzzed under your skin as you leaned against jay’s car, the harsh fluorescent lights in the parking lot flickering overhead like they were mocking your mood. today had been a fucking disaster, all because your boss had to lose his shit over something as stupid as a font. “can you believe that prick?” you huffed, running your fingers through your hair, still feeling the burn of irritation. “who the fuck cares about a font?” jay chuckled, but you caught the edge in his eyes, the same frustration simmering beneath that calm, easygoing mask he always wore. “yeah, the man’s got a real talent for missing the point,” he muttered, arms crossed, leaning back against his car like he wasn’t two seconds away from snapping himself.
he always had this way of looking like everything was under control, even when you both wanted to set the office on fire. “but fuck it, we crushed it. and honestly? he can go fuck himself.” you let out a sharp laugh, tension easing off your shoulders just a little. jay always had that effect, making the shittiest days feel like they weren’t so bad when he was around. and even though you could tell he was just as pissed, he never let it show. it was... comforting, somehow. god, he’s good, you thought, watching the way he managed to keep his cool when you were one bad comment away from throwing your laptop across the room. “you’re better than me,” you said, your voice softening without meaning to. “i would’ve lost it in there.” he shrugged, giving you a small, crooked smile. “just trying to keep the peace. doesn’t mean i’m not pissed.” his eyes flicked to yours, something darker in his gaze before he pushed off the car, a subtle shift in the air. you glanced at your watch, realizing how late it was. fuck. jungwon was probably at home by now, waiting for you. the thought brought a flicker of guilt to your chest, but before you could get too lost in it, jay’s voice cut through your thoughts. “hey,” he said, voice casual, but with an edge of something more. “wanna grab a drink? we deserve it after today.”
you blinked, a little caught off guard. “you sure? it’s late, and i didn’t peg you as the greasy takeout and beer type.” jay grinned, that playful spark lighting up his eyes. “who said anything about greasy? i know a spot. nothing too fancy, just... chill.” you raised a brow, skeptical. “knowing you, ‘chill’ could mean anything. i’m half-expecting a place that charges for air.” he laughed, leaning in slightly, his voice dropping a bit. “trust me. you’ll like it.” you hesitated for a second, but fuck it—you could use a drink. after the shitshow of a day you’d had, spending more time with jay wasn’t exactly a bad idea either. you slid into his car, the leather cool against your skin as you let out a tired sigh. jay kept things light, cracking jokes that had you laughing and forgetting why you were so pissed in the first place. he had that way about him, making everything feel easier, like nothing was a big deal when you were with him. when you pulled up to the restaurant, your jaw almost hit the floor. “chaconne?” you half-laughed, staring at the chandeliers, the valet parking, and people walking in wearing designer shit like it was a casual tuesday. “you said ‘pretty chill,’ not... this.” jay smirked, clearly enjoying your reaction. “it’s not that bad. come on.”
you smacked his arm lightly as you stepped out of the car, rolling your eyes. “i would’ve been fine with some dive bar and burgers, you know.” he laughed, guiding you inside. “yeah, but you deserve more than that. trust me.” and, there it was again—something about the way he said that, the way he looked at you. it wasn’t just friendly anymore. it felt... intentional. the second you stepped inside, the low hum of conversation and soft glow of chandeliers wrapped around you. this place was fancy, no doubt, and you felt a little out of place in your office attire. but jay? he looked like he belonged here, pulling out a chair for you with a smoothness that made your stomach flip. “this is too much,” you muttered, sitting down. “do they charge by chandelier?” jay chuckled, sitting across from you, and for a second, something in his eyes softened in a way that made your chest tighten. “seriously, stop. you deserve it. this is my treat.” you tried to shake off the warmth spreading through you, but it was hard to ignore. jay had always been sweet, always thoughtful, but tonight? there was something different in the way he looked at you. something heavier. the banter flowed easily as it always did, jokes and sarcasm bouncing between you two like normal, but every time his knee brushed yours under the table, whether it was on purpose or not, you felt it. every glance, every smile, felt like a little spark that you weren’t sure what to do with.
it wasn’t just the food or the wine—it was him. the way he leaned in just a little closer when he talked, this wasn’t the usual flirtation you were used to with him. this felt... deliberate. and as you sipped your wine, pretending not to notice the way jay’s eyes flicked down to your lips, you couldn’t help but wonder where the night was heading. “what?” you asked, catching him watching you again as you set your glass down, trying to keep your voice steady. jay leaned back in his chair, that familiar cocky smirk on his lips. “nothing,” he said, voice low, teasing. “just thinking... this might be the best idea i’ve had all week.” you raised an eyebrow, trying to ignore the way your heart skipped a beat. “taking me to an overpriced restaurant? yeah, real genius.” he chuckled, his eyes darkening just a little. “no... spending more time with you.” “are you flirting with me?” you teased, trying to keep it light, but your voice was softer now, your pulse picking up. jay’s lips twitched, and for a second, his eyes dropped to your lips again before snapping back up. “maybe i am.”
you swallowed, the tension between you both thick enough to cut. “and here i thought you were a gentleman,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper now. his smirk deepened. “i am,” he murmured, leaning in just a little more. “but you’re making it hard to stay one.” the heat in your chest spread lower, and you shifted in your seat, trying to stay composed. “well, then maybe you should stop teasing.” jay’s gaze flickered to your lips again, his voice dropping even lower. “maybe i don’t want to.” the conversation flowed easily all night, a smooth back-and-forth, laughter filling the space between you and jay as the wine worked its magic, loosening the edge that had been hanging over you both. you talked about everything—your turn-offs, shitty relationships, future plans—stuff you wouldn’t usually share with anyone. but with jay? it was easy. too easy.
“i was such a troublemaker back in the day,” jay confessed, laughing as he played with the rim of his wine glass, his fingers tapping lightly against the smooth surface. “got myself into some crazy shit before i finally realized i had to get my act together.” you leaned in, grinning at him, already intrigued. “oh yeah? what happened? what made jay park, the legend, finally decide to get his shit together?” he smirked, his eyes glinting with something darker, something playful as he met your gaze head-on. “had to step up. couldn’t be a a kid forever, right?” you cocked your head to the side, teasing. “so, what? you’re a responsible troublemaker now?” jay chuckled, fingers tracing the rim of his glass as his gaze lingered on you. “something like that.” you could feel the wine starting to hit, your cheeks flushed, your body a little warmer than before, and you knew he’d noticed too. his eyes kept flicking over your face, taking in the flush on your skin under the dim light of the restaurant, like he was seeing you differently tonight. “so,” you started, leaning forward just a little, a playful glint in your eye. “how much do you actually make, mr. responsible troublemaker?”
he didn’t answer right away, and you saw that smirk of his slowly curl back onto his lips. it was a power move, a playful one that had you shifting in your seat, wondering how long he was gonna drag this out. he finally looked up, tapping his finger against his chin, pretending to be deep in thought. “hmm, let me think…” you rolled your eyes, laughing lightly as you leaned back, trying to keep it casual. “come on, don’t edge me like that.” jay’s eyes flashed with something darker for just a split second, but he quickly covered it with a chuckle, raising an eyebrow at you. “edging you? didn’t know i was doing anything special.” the heat in your face rose, but you didn’t back down. the tension between you was thick, a game you weren’t sure you could win, but fuck it—you were in too deep now. “yeah, well, you’re doing a pretty good job of it,” you say suggestively. jay’s smirk widened, his gaze sharpening as he leaned forward, his elbows resting on the table. “am i now? didn’t realize you were so impatient.” you crossed your legs under the table, hoping he didn’t notice how tightly your thighs pressed together at his words, at the way your body was reacting to every little thing he was saying.
“i’m not impatient,” you replied, your voice a little breathier than you intended. “just curious. you’ve been holding out on me all night.” his gaze dropped to your lips for just a second, almost too fast to catch, but it was enough to send your stomach flipping. he leaned in closer, his voice dropping lower, his words wrapping around you like a caress. “maybe i’m just enjoying watching you squirm.” the way he looked at you—like he wanted to eat you alive, like he was holding back on purpose—it took everything in you not to lose your composure completely. “careful,” you murmured, your voice soft but laced with a challenge. “you might regret teasing me.” jay leaned back in his chair, still relaxed, still in control, but the air between you was charged, heavy with something neither of you could ignore. “i doubt i’d regret it,” he said, his smile too knowing, too cocky. “besides, you look good when you’re flustered.” you swallowed hard, trying to keep your cool, but the way his words slid into the space between you made it impossible to ignore the heat pooling low in your stomach.
he knew exactly what he was doing to you. “you’re trouble, park,” you muttered, though your words lacked any real bite. truth was, you didn’t want him to stop. not even close. jay grinned, his eyes glinting with that same playful, almost dangerous edge as he took another sip of his wine. “you have no idea.” jay was still being a gentleman—technically, he wasn’t crossing any lines—but the way he spoke to you, the way he looked at you, it was enough to leave your pussy throbbing under the table. by the time the night ended, and jay walked you out, his hand lightly resting on the small of your back, you couldn’t shake the feeling that something had shifted between you. and as you glanced up at him, catching the way his eyes lingered on yours, you knew you weren’t the only one feeling it.
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you both stumbled up the stairs, giggles slipping out of you as jay’s hand stayed firmly on your back, warm and steady. no elevators, just endless steps, and the alcohol running through your veins made everything seem a little funnier than it should have been.
“god,” you slurred through your laughter, grabbing jay’s arm to steady yourself. “you’d think after living here for years, i’d be used to this.” jay chuckled despite the mess of the night. “you’ve survived this long. i think you’ll make it.” when your apartment finally came into view, you reached for your keys, but the loud shouts and bursts of laughter hit you first. you groaned, already knowing exactly who it was. “shit,” you sighed, leaning into jay with a grin that felt more playful than exasperated. “jake and sunghoon are here. they’re probably playing that stupid horror game again.” jay raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing on his lips. “you didn’t mention they’d be here.” you shrugged, pushing the door open a little. “they’re harmless. might as well introduce you before they scare you off.”
quietly, you pushed the door open, jay trailing behind. the scene inside was chaotic—snacks scattered, empty cans thrown all over the place, the three boys huddled around the screen, completely lost in the game. jake and sunghoon were yelling, clearly losing, while jungwon sat in the middle, eyes glued to the screen, fingers gripping the controller so tight his knuckles turned white. his jaw was locked, brows furrowed in concentration. but the second his eyes flicked over to you, his grip tightened even more, and his pulse quickened as he took in the sight of your flushed cheeks, the tipsy smile that played on your lips. you looked fucking gorgeous. “heyyy,” you giggled, stepping fully inside and waving dramatically at the guys. jake turned first, his grin wide and teasing as soon as he saw you. “oh, look who’s back,” jake said, leaning back against the couch, voice dripping with amusement. “knew you’d be tipsy by now.” sunghoon glanced over, laughing as well. “you look like you had one hell of a time.” you pushed the door open wider, and that’s when all their attention shifted to jay standing behind you. jungwon felt his stomach drop, a cold knot forming in his chest. he didn’t need you to introduce him. he knew exactly who this guy was. jay. with a smooth smile, jay raised a hand in greeting. “hey, nice to meet you guys.”
jake and sunghoon exchanged quick, surprised glances, their tipsy minds catching up slower than usual. but they jumped up to greet him anyway, stumbling over themselves. “hey, man!” jake practically shouted, extending his hand for a firm handshake. “nice to meet you.” sunghoon followed right after, shaking his head with a grin. “yeah, didn’t know y/n had friends outside of work,” he teased, shaking jay’s hand too. but jungwon? he was slower. more deliberate. his eyes stayed glued to you, even as he stood up, forcing himself to extend a hand to jay. his mind raced, trying to make sense of it all. this was the guy. “nice to finally meet you,” jungwon said, his voice tight, the grip of his handshake firmer than it needed to be. “she wouldn’t shut up about you.” there was a sharp edge to his words, but jay didn’t seem to catch it. he just laughed, throwing a glance in your direction. “oh yeah? she talks about me?” jungwon forced a smirk, one that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “yeah, mostly about how fucking loaded you are.”
your face flushed with embarrassment, and you quickly nudged jungwon’s side, laughing awkwardly. “he’s exaggerating,” you muttered. “i didn’t say that much.” jay chuckled, leaning in a little closer. “don’t worry. i’m flattered.” he was too smooth. way too smooth. and the way you lit up every time he spoke? it was obvious. jay really wasn’t just some guy. all the anxiety he felt, made sense. he wasn't overthinking it, he wasn't being paranoid. jay was a bigger problem than he thought. jungwon sat back down on the couch, fists clenched in his lap as jake and sunghoon dragged jay over, introducing him to the mess of their night. but jungwon couldn’t focus on their chatter, or the chaos of the room. all he could see was you. standing there, flushed, tipsy, looking too fucking good for your own good.
you sat beside jungwon, wrapping your arms around him in a playful hug like you always did. “this is jungwon,” you said, smiling up at him with that same affection. “my brother.” brother. right. jungwon forced a smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. if it were just the two of you, he’d be teasing you right now, making fun of how tipsy you were, how clingy you got when you were drunk. but with jay watching, he had to play it cool. had to pretend like everything was fine. “yeah,” jungwon said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “she talks about you all the time. couldn’t get her to shut up about how great you are.” jay smiled, unfazed, clearly amused by the whole thing. “well, i’ll take that as a compliment.” you groaned, swatting at jungwon’s arm. “why do you have to make it weird, won?” but jungwon barely heard you. his eyes were glued to you—the way your shirt had come undone, your hair a mess from the night out, your skirt riding up just a little too high. you looked like a fucking dream. and jay was seeing it, too. he could tell by the way jay’s eyes lingered on you, by the subtle shift in his smile.
jungwon’s fists tightened in his lap, and for a split second, he thought about saying something, anything to get you away from jay. but he didn’t. instead, he sat back, pretending like he didn’t care, like he always did. the conversation flowed around him, jake and sunghoon going back and forth with jay, throwing questions at him about work, life, plans—shit jungwon couldn’t give a fuck about. every now and then, he’d force himself to chime in, all for the sake of keeping up appearances. “so, jay,” jake asked, leaning in like they were old friends, a grin plastered across his face, “any big plans after this project with y/n?” jay shrugged, his eyes flicking toward you for a second, and the way his gaze softened made jungwon want to punch something. “we’ve got a few more campaigns lined up, keeping us busy, but we’re handling it. y/n’s been great to work with.” of course you’ve been great. “yeah, she’s an asset,” he muttered, the words sharp and bitter. you shot jay a warm smile, and the look in your eyes, that soft admiration, twisted the knife deeper. “he’s just being modest,” you said, your voice quiet but full of gratitude. “i’ve learned a lot from him.” jungwon couldn’t fucking stand it. the way you looked at jay like he hung the stars in the sky, like he was something special.
the conversation dragged on for a few more minutes, jay playing the perfect gentleman, but all jungwon could focus on was the way you seemed to gravitate toward him, like the room wasn’t big enough to keep the distance. then, you glanced at the clock, realizing how late it had gotten. “shit,” you muttered, standing up a little too quickly, swaying on your feet, tipsy from the wine. “i should probably go to bed.” jay was on his feet instantly, his hand on your arm, steadying you before you could even stumble. “you okay?” “yeah, just… tipsy,” you laughed, brushing it off like it was nothing. but jungwon saw it. the way jay looked at you, warm. protective. everything jungwon wanted to be for you. jungwon stayed silent as he watched you lean into jay, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. every time you smiled at him, every time you let yourself get a little too close, jungwon felt his patience wearing thin. “i’ll walk you to your room,” jay offered, his voice soft, like it was some grand fucking gesture. and you, tipsy and flustered, nodded, grateful.
jungwon didn’t say a word. he stood there, stiff, watching as you and jay made your way toward the hall. every part of him screamed to do something, to stop you, to pull you away from jay and tell you to stay. to tell you that it should’ve been him walking you to your room, not jay. but he didn’t. he just forced a small, tight smile, pretending like he wasn’t falling apart inside as he watched you leave with someone else. “she’s in good hands, man,” sunghoon said after a beat, breaking the silence, giving jungwon a look that was far too knowing for his liking. “jay seems solid.” “yeah,” jungwon muttered, his voice barely audible, barely able to form the words. “i’m sure she is.” but deep down, all he could think about was how badly he wished it was him. he wanted to be the one you trusted, the one you leaned on when you were tipsy and unsteady. the one you turned to when you needed someone. the one you chose.
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as jay walked you down the hallway, his hand resting lightly on the small of your back, you could feel the warmth of his touch seeping through your skin, making your body hum under his fingers. everything around you feeling lighter, easier, thanks to the alcohol still buzzing in your system. “first time getting walked to my damn room,” you mumbled, a grin pulling at your lips. “so... proper.” jay chuckled, his voice low and smooth, sending a shiver down your spine. “someone’s gotta make sure you get there in one piece,” he teased, his hand lingering on your back, staying there a little longer than necessary. you rolled your eyes, stumbling slightly as you caught yourself with his help, feeling the heat rise in your cheeks. “oh, please. i’ve lived here forever. pretty sure i could find my way blindfolded.” jay smirked, steadying you with that familiar, calm touch, leaning in a little closer, his breath warm against your ear. “you sure about that? i'm pretty sure you almost face-planted into that wall.” you laughed, swatting at his chest, “okay, maybe i’m a little more drunk than i thought.” the laughter faded as you both reached your door, the air between you thickening, tension slowly building. jay’s hand slipped away from your back, but his eyes stayed glued to yours. he took a step back, just enough to let the moment breathe, but you could still feel him, that pull between you two impossible to ignore. “you good?” he asked softly, his voice losing some of the teasing, dropping into something more intimate, more real. you nodded, biting your lip as warmth spread through your chest, not just from the wine, but from the way he was looking at you. “yeah... thanks for tonight. i had a good time.”
jay smiled, his gaze flicking down to your lips for the briefest second before he met your eyes again. “me too,” he murmured, his voice low, like he was sharing a secret with you. “i’m glad we did this.” you swallowed, the weight of the moment settling in your chest, and then—your tipsy brain decided to cut through the tension. “okay, mister proper,” you teased, though your voice was a little more breathless than you intended, “this is where you leave me.” jay ran a hand through his hair, stepping back a little, but his eyes never left yours. “right. wouldn’t want to ruin my perfect gentleman streak.” you laughed, but the heat between you hadn’t gone anywhere. “goodnight, jay.” “goodnight, y/n,” he said softly, and with one last look, he turned and started walking down the hallway, leaving you standing there, heart still racing in your chest. you watched him go, and just as he reached the corner, something inside you stirred—nerves, excitement, you weren’t sure—but before you could stop yourself, you called out, “wait, jay?” he stopped, turning back to you, that easy smile tugging at his lips again. “yeah?” you hesitated, the wine still making you a little bolder than usual. “you’re not just leaving like that, are you?” jay raised an eyebrow, his smile turning more playful, more curious. “what, you miss me already?” you rolled your eyes, but the warmth in your chest only grew. “maybe,” you teased, leaning against the doorframe, trying to keep it light, “just wasn’t expecting you to... leave so fast.”
jay started making his way back toward you, his hands slipping into his pockets, his eyes locked on yours as he stopped just a few steps away. “well, you did say ‘goodnight,’” he pointed out, his smirk still there, confident and infuriating. you bit your lip, feeling a sudden wave of self-consciousness, but you pushed through it, “yeah, but i didn’t mean, like, leave-leave.” your voice trailed off slightly as you glanced down, heat rising in your cheeks. “i just... i really had fun tonight. thanks for... everything.” jay took another step closer, his voice dropping even lower, that same calm, comforting tone. “it was my pleasure. i had a great time too, y/n. honestly.” you looked up at him, and there it was again—that feeling. the butterflies in your stomach, the way he was standing so close that you could feel the warmth radiating off him. “so...” you started, your voice a little shaky, “i guess, uh... i’ll see you tomorrow?” jay inhaled deeply, his smile still there but a little more restrained. “yeah,” he said softly, “i’ll see you tomorrow.” for a second, you were sure he might lean in, that the night was about to take a different turn. but then jay stepped back, just enough to let the moment hang in the air, unresolved. “we’ll leave it at that... for now.” then, without another word, he turned, walking down the hallway with a quiet confidence that left you breathless. he didn’t look back, leaving you standing there, heart pounding, mind spinning. leave it at that, for now. the words replayed in your mind, a promise, a pause in the inevitable. it left you wondering—not if—but when something more might happen.
the sound of the front door closing echoed through the quiet apartment, sealing the night behind you. faint murmurs of jay saying his goodbyes to the boys lingered, but they felt distant, drowned out by the racing pulse in your chest. once you made it to your room, the door clicking shut behind you, you exhaled a long breath, one you hadn’t realized you’d been holding onto for so long. everything from the evening hung in the air—every glance, every word exchanged between you and jay, replaying in your mind like a highlight reel. “oh my god,” you muttered under your breath, feeling the heat rise to your face as a smile broke across your lips. and then, without warning, a giggle slipped out. you tried covering your mouth with your hands, but it was no use—the excitement bubbling up inside you couldn’t be contained.
before you knew it, another laugh escaped, louder this time, and suddenly you were bouncing on your bed, your body moving purely from the rush of joy flooding your veins. jay liked you. or at the very least, there was something there, something undeniable. the realization hit you all at once, and it sent another wave of excitement straight through you. you collapsed onto your bed, sinking into the pillows with a grin you couldn’t wipe away if you tried. “what the hell just happened?” you whispered, staring up at the ceiling, still in disbelief at how the night had played out. hugging a pillow to your chest, you giggled again, feeling the thrill of possibility wrapping around you like a blanket. everything about tonight felt different. special. like it was the start of something you weren’t ready to name, but you could feel it growing. rolling onto your side, you clutched the pillow tighter, another quiet laugh slipping out. “i can’t believe that just happened,” you mumbled, still grinning like you were in some sort of dream, your mind racing with the memory of jay’s lingering touches, the way he looked at you, the way his words felt like they held a secret just for you. as you lay there, thoughts kept drifting back to him—how easy it was being around him tonight, how much fun you had together, how different it felt from every other time you’d seen him at work. tonight was different, you could feel it. something between the two of you had changed, and you knew that tomorrow, things wouldn’t be the same.
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jungwon sat slumped on the couch, his eyes glued to the tv, the images blurred together, meaningless noise in the background of his thoughts. jay had left a while ago, but the tension in jungwon’s chest hadn’t gone anywhere. he absentmindedly reached into a bag of stale chips, shoving another one in his mouth, but it tasted like cardboard. his mind was too busy replaying every interaction between you and jay, over and over, like some sick movie he couldn’t turn off. jake and sunghoon were still chatting, their voices fading as the night wore on. they’d been talking about marvel movies, but jungwon hadn’t really been listening. he felt like his brain was overheating. sunghoon stretched out lazily on the couch, his voice heavy with sleep. “so... jay. dude seems solid, huh? i don't think you should worry about y/n too much.” jake groaned, half-asleep already, tossing a pillow over his head. “he’s cool, but man, too tired for this shit. let’s talk tomorrow.” his words were muffled, barely coherent as he drifted closer to sleep. jungwon’s grip tightened on the chip bag, the plastic crinkling under his fingers. he wanted to tell them to shut the hell up, to stop talking about jay like it was no big deal. but he stayed quiet, shoving another tasteless chip in his mouth, chewing mechanically.
sunghoon, still awake, glanced over at jungwon with a lazy smirk. “but don’t you think it’s weird? like, he just shows up out of nowhere, and now he’s all over y/n?” the comment made jungwon’s stomach churn but he kept his mouth shut. he didn’t trust himself to speak without losing it. jake, half-conscious now, mumbled from under the pillow, “y/n’s a big girl. she knows what she’s doing. jay’s just a guy.” just a guy. jungwon swallowed the lump in his throat, forcing down the bile that was rising. he wanted to scream, to throw something, to do anything to stop feeling like this. “he’s not just some guy,” jungwon muttered under his breath, the words slipping out before he could stop them. he wasn’t even sure if sunghoon or jake had heard him. but sunghoon had. he turned his head slightly, raising an eyebrow at jungwon. “what was that?”
jungwon sighed, trying to play it off, forcing himself to sound casual. “nothing. just... hope he’s not wasting her time.” sunghoon yawned, stretching again, his eyelids heavy. “nah, y/n’s smart. she’ll figure it out.” jungwon glanced at jake, who had passed out completely, limbs sprawled out across the couch. sunghoon wasn’t far behind, his head nodding as sleep pulled him under. but jungwon couldn’t sleep. his mind wouldn’t shut off. with a deep sigh, jungwon stood up, tossing the half-empty chip bag onto the coffee table. the quiet hum of the fridge filled the flat as he made his way to the kitchen. he grabbed two beers, the cool metal of the cans grounding him, if only for a second. as he walked back toward his room, he passed by your door. he slowed down, his eyes lingering on it. were you still awake? were you thinking about jay right now? the thought made his chest tighten, but he forced himself to keep walking, pushing open the door to his own room. he dropped into his chair, cracking open the beer with a sharp hiss. he took a long swig, hoping the alcohol would numb the gnawing ache in his gut. he booted up his computer, needing a distraction, something to take his mind off everything. but the second the screen flickered to life, his stomach dropped.
there it was—the live feed from the camera he’d hidden in your room. his eyes locked onto the screen, guilt and shame flooding his body in an instant. but he doesn't look away. jungwon sat frozen, staring at the screen like it was some sort of punishment he couldn’t escape from. there you were, sitting on your bed, bathed in the soft glow of your bedside lamp, phone in hand, giggling quietly to yourself. you looked so fucking happy. too happy. your fingers moved quickly over the phone, typing, pausing now and then to laugh softly, lips curling into that familiar smile. the smile he knew wasn’t for him. jungwon took another long swig of his beer, trying to drown out the jealousy gnawing at him, but like everything else, it didn’t help. nothing ever did. he set the beer down, fingers curling into tight fists as he watched you. part of him wanted to slam the laptop shut but he needed to know who you were texting, though he could already guess it by now. his breath caught as you suddenly sat up, that same damn smile spreading across your face. the eagerness in your movements sent a wave of dread crashing over him.
what the fuck was happening? you stood in front of your mirror, fixing your hair, smoothing out your clothes. jungwon watched you, his grip on the mouse tightening. you hadn’t even been home an hour and you were already getting ready to talk to jay again? seriously? it was hard enough seeing you with jay earlier, but now—now you were about to do a video call, giggling like some lovesick teenager. you glanced at your phone, then plopped back onto your bed, adjusting yourself, fluffing your hair, making sure everything was just right. jungwon’s heart sank. he knew that look all too well. it was all for jay. he couldn’t tear his eyes away, watching as you picked up your phone again, smiling at whatever message popped up on the screen. then, through the speakers, he heard it—your voice. "miss me already?" you said, laughter filled the room, and jungwon felt his chest tighten.
of course. the beer can in his hand crumpled slightly under the pressure of his grip, but he didn’t care. every muscle in his body was wound tight, ready to snap. he listened, jaw clenched, as jay’s voice crackled through the speakers, muffled but clear enough to set jungwon’s blood boiling. “just got home,” jay’s voice said, casual, like none of this was fucking with jungwon’s head. “first time on a video call, huh? can’t believe we’ve never done this before.” your eyes sparkled as you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, settling into the bed, completely unaware of the storm brewing in the next room. “yeah, kinda weird but fun,” you replied, your voice light, carefree. “guess there’s a first for everything.” the conversation between you and jay flowed easily, his voice seeping through the speakers like poison as you both planned to meet up again. jungwon could barely breathe as he listened to you suggest the weekend. “maybe we can do something... just us,” jay’s voice came through, warm and smooth.
just us. jay wasn’t just a passing interest. he was already staking his claim, like jungwon didn’t even exist. then you teased, your voice dropping to a playful tone, the kind you only used when you were comfortable with someone. “is it the alcohol, or are you actually obsessed with me, jay?” jay chuckled, his voice lower now, raspier. probably from exhaustion, probably because he was thinking about you. “oh, you caught me. totally obsessed. can’t stop thinking about you.” you bit your lip, a small smile playing on your lips. fuck, you were glowing. you were eating this shit up. “well, you do seem to be sticking around,” you teased, enjoying every second of it. jungwon’s stomach churned. he could see it all over your face—how much you were enjoying this. how much jay was getting under your skin, in ways that no one else ever had. then, you took it further. “if i’m so special, you’d break your gentlemanly streak.” jungwon could hear the playful edge in jay’s voice as he responded. “is this why you called? you wanted me to stay over, didn’t you?” your laugh was soft, but jungwon could see the way you bit your lip, see how flustered you were getting. “i don’t know. you tell me.” jungwon’s fist slammed down on the desk before he even realized it, the sharp thud breaking the moment. his entire body shook with the effort of holding back, his chest heaving as anger twisted inside him. the beer can crumpled completely in his hand, but he didn’t care. his focus was on you—on what was happening right in front of him.
this was worse than anything. worse than any of your exes. because with jay, it wasn’t just physical. jay was pulling you in, wrapping you around his fucking finger, and jungwon couldn’t do shit about it. your head snapped up at the sudden noise, your smile faltering as you glanced toward jungwon’s room. “what was that?” you asked, the unease creeping into your voice, pulling you out of the moment with jay. on the screen, jay raised an eyebrow, concern flickering in his eyes. “everything okay?” he asked, his voice soft, probing, like he could sense something was off. you forced a smile, waving it off, though the tension lingered in the air. “yeah, it’s fine,” you said, but the waver in your voice gave you away. you glanced back toward jungwon’s room, your brow furrowed. “i think it’s just jungwon.” jay’s concern deepened. “is he okay? maybe you should check on him.” you hesitated, torn between the conversation and the guilt tugging at you. was jungwon okay? the noise had been loud, and it wasn’t like him to react like that. what the hell was going on with him? you bit your lip, uncertainty creeping in. “he’s probably fine,” you muttered, trying to convince yourself as much as jay. “maybe he just dropped something.” but deep down, you weren’t sure. things had been off with jungwon lately—he’d been distant, quieter. and you had been caught up in other things, like work, like jay, barely noticing it.
jay’s voice cut through your thoughts. “are you sure? i don’t mind letting you go if you need to check on him.”
you shook your head, not wanting to break the mood between you two. “no, no... he’s probably just being his usual grumpy self.” but even as you said it, you couldn’t shake the unease. maybe jungwon was upset. maybe you had been neglecting him. you sighed, running a hand through your hair, wondering when things had gotten so complicated. “what’s wrong with him?” you muttered under your breath, glancing toward your door again. jay tried to lighten the mood, his voice warm. “he’s probably just jealous. i mean, if i had a sister like you, i’d be protective too.” you laughed, though it sounded hollow. “yeah, he’s always been that way,” you admitted, though the knot in your stomach didn’t loosen. jay’s gaze softened, concern and affection mixing in his expression. “seriously, though. if he’s upset, you should talk to him.” you nodded, knowing jay was right, but not wanting to deal with it right now. the conversation between you and jay had been going so well, and you weren’t ready to let it go yet. “sorry to cockblock you,” you muttered with a grin, trying to shift the mood back to playful. jay’s laughter was immediate, warm and infectious, shaking off some of the tension. “oh, come on,” he said, still chuckling. “don’t apologize. i’m just glad you still think i’m a gentleman after all this.” his laugh made you smile despite yourself, and for a moment, the unease faded. you joined in, teasing him right back. “well, i did just ruin the moment.” jay wiped away a fake tear, grinning. “trust me,” he said, voice still playful, “there’s no ruining anything with you.”
an idea hit you, your eyes lighting up with mischief as you giggled, grabbing your phone. excitement bubbled inside as you scrolled through your gallery, your finger hovering over a certain photo. the smile on your face faltered for just a second. it wasn’t exactly a nude, but the picture of you in your baby blue lingerie set? yeah, it was definitely provocative. jay’s brow shot up when he noticed the hesitation. “what are you up to?” he asked, the playful tone lingering in his voice, teasing, almost challenging. you grinned, your lip tugging between your teeth. “it’s an apology,” you teased, before hitting send. your heart raced as you waited, watching his phone buzz. anticipation prickled up your spine, making your stomach flip in that giddy way.
when jay opened the message, his reaction was instant. he sat up straighter, his lips parting, eyes widening as they scanned the image. the moment it clicked, his teeth sunk into his lower lip, and you heard the faintest groan escape him. fuck, he looked sexy like that. “well, damn,” jay muttered, his voice a bit lower, his gaze flicking back to yours. “kind of regret leaving so soon now.” a wave of warmth spread through you, making your pulse race. leaning closer to the screen, you bit your lip, “so, still gonna be a gentleman, or am i that special?” jay’s grin spread wider, amusement glinting in his darkened eyes. “depends,” he murmured, his voice smooth, inviting, “how special do you think you are?” your confidence surged, and you shot back without missing a beat. “oh, i’d say i’m worth bending the rules for.”
jay’s chuckle sent a shiver down your spine, his gaze flicking back to the photo. “if you keep talking like that,” he said, voice dropping, “i just might.”
you were about to push further, to see just how far he’d go with this, but then you heard it again—a sound from the other side of the wall. jungwon. again. jay noticed immediately, his playful demeanor shifting to something more concerned. “still think he’s okay?” he asked, his tone soft but pointed. you sighed, glancing at your door. “i don’t know... maybe i should check on him.” jay nodded, his expression softening. “yeah, probably a good idea. we can pick this up later.” he smirked, and there was a glint in his eyes, a promise in his voice. “but next time,” he paused, leaning closer to the camera, “wear that same set when i take you out.”
you laughed softly, warmth still lingering in your chest even after the call ended. the teasing excitement from jay stayed with you, but now, there was something else brewing. a sense of worry, creeping in at the edges. jungwon. you stood, giggling softly as the room tilted slightly. damn, you were more tipsy than you realized, and it took a second to steady yourself against the wall. jay kept you grounded, kept your focus on him like no one else could. but now, without him on the line, everything felt off, unsettled. maybe that’s just what he did to you—pulled all your attention in, made you forget everything else, even forget about how much you used to think about jungwon. and now, without him, everything was crashing back in. stumbling slightly, you sighed, feeling the weight of your concern. jungwon. something wasn’t right, not with the way he’d been acting, not with the thud from earlier echoing in your mind. you couldn’t ignore it anymore. pushing yourself forward, you headed down the hallway, your heart pounding in a way that had nothing to do with the wine or jay. what the hell is going on with him?
as you approached jungwon’s door, the sound of your familiar footsteps made his heart race. panic surged through him, adrenaline kicking in. he could hear your clumsy shuffle outside, but his mind was too clouded to focus—his eyes glued to the live feed still open on his screen. fuck. his fingers scrambled across the keyboard, minimizing the window in a flash. his screen flickered back to the innocent desktop wallpaper just as the door swung open. you stumbled in, nearly tripping over yourself, that tipsy smile lighting up your face. “hey,” you slurred, gaze locking onto him. jungwon sat there, stiff as a board, looking like a deer caught in headlights. you noticed the way his eyes darted toward the screen before meeting yours again. something was definitely off. “you good?” you asked, voice soft but with genuine concern, even through your drunk haze. there was something about his posture, the awkward stiffness that made you pause. his screen showed nothing out of the ordinary—just a plain wallpaper. but the way he looked at you, like he’d been caught red-handed, made your drunk mind spin. the realization hit you, and a teasing grin spread across your face. “oh…” you mumbled, eyes widening in mock surprise. “were you…?” you trailed off, giggling as the most obvious explanation popped into your head.
was jungwon watching porn? jungwon’s heart pounded harder, realizing what you were thinking. the teasing look in your eyes, the way you bit your lip to hold back laughter—it was clear you had jumped to a conclusion. and letting you believe that? yeah, way better than the truth. in a split second, he made the decision. “yeah,” he muttered, leaning back in his chair, trying to act casual. “caught me.” your eyes blinked in surprise, not expecting him to admit it so easily. the teasing grin faltered for a moment, but then you laughed, stumbling a bit as you waved your hands in a sloppy apology. “oh shit—sorry!” you giggled, your voice light as you tried not to laugh too hard. “didn’t mean to interrupt or anything.”
jungwon forced a smirk, his insides churning, but his face stayed calm. “it’s fine,” he shrugged, playing it cool, even though his mind was still racing. you leaned against the doorframe, your drunken smile wide as you eyed him. something about the way he was sitting there—too still, too stiff—made you pause. but your hazy mind couldn’t hold onto the thought for long, quickly getting distracted by the warmth in your body and the lightness in your head. “well, don’t work too hard, alright?” you teased, throwing him a playful wink. jungwon cleared his throat, fumbling over his words in a weak attempt to seem casual. “yeah, uh… i just hit my knee on the table earlier. nothing big.” it was a pathetic excuse, and he knew it. but you were drunk, too drunk to notice how thinly veiled the lie was. you giggled, brushing it off. “really?” you laughed, stepping closer to him, your eyes gleaming with curiosity. “sounds like you were watching something good.”
but something shifted in his expression—his eyes darkened, the atmosphere thickening around you. you froze for a second, your drunken confidence faltering as you stopped just short of getting too close. “why’re you so curious all of a sudden?” jungwon’s voice had dropped lower, more serious, almost challenging. “wanna know what i’m into?” the question hung in the air, heavier than it should have been. your breath hitched, the alcohol making it hard to process the meaning behind his words. and then it hit you. your heart raced as you blinked, caught off guard by the intensity in his gaze. “oh, come on,” you muttered nervously, laughing to shake off the tension. “don’t be weird. besides…” you trailed off, eyes sweeping over him in a way you hadn’t before, your tongue loose from the alcohol. “you’re already hot, you don’t need that stuff.” jungwon’s heart nearly stopped. hot? you’d called him hot? he stared at you, his brain short-circuiting, trying to process what you’d just said. he didn’t know how to respond, didn’t know what to do with the way his chest tightened at your casual compliment. you blinked, suddenly aware of what you’d let slip. “i mean—” you stammered, waving your hand as if to erase the awkwardness. “forget it. you should just get a girlfriend.” the words hit him harder than they should have. get a girlfriend. like it was that simple. like anyone could ever compare to you. his eyes lingered on you, the way your clothes were wrinkled from the day, how you stood there so oblivious to what you did to him.
how many times had he imagined you, like this, stumbling into his room, his bed, then fucking you in that exact outfit? he swallowed hard, the desire twisting painfully inside him as he forced a neutral expression. “yeah…” he mumbled, his voice barely steady. “maybe i should.” but you didn’t notice the turmoil behind his eyes. you were already pulling away, giggling softly as you pushed off the doorframe. “anyway, don’t stay up too late watching… whatever,” you teased, oblivious to the storm raging inside him. the door clicked shut behind you, and jungwon’s body slumped in his chair. his breath came out shaky, his chest tight with frustration. fuck, he wanted you. wanted you so bad it physically hurt. his eyes stayed glued to the door long after you’d left, the tension in his body refusing to dissipate. slowly, his gaze drifted back to the computer screen, his fingers twitching toward the mouse. the live feed was still there, minimized in the taskbar, waiting. he could feel the pull, the temptation to click it, to watch you again.
a frustrated groan slipped past his lips as he rubbed his face with both hands, trying to shake the need out of his head. you were so fucking clueless. so damn unaware of the effect you had on him, how deeply you’d burrowed yourself into his mind.
just as he thought he might get a grip on himself, he heard it—your voice, slurred and cheerful, calling out from down the hallway. “i love ya!” you sang, your words soaked in alcohol and affection. jungwon froze. his heart twisted painfully in his chest as he heard your drunken giggle follow, light and carefree—the kind of laugh that used to make him smile. now it felt like someone twisting the knife deeper. his hands pressed against his eyes, trying to block out the sound, trying to ignore the way your words lingered in his head. “i love ya!”—like it didn’t mean anything. like it was just something you threw around casually. he knew it was the alcohol talking, knew you didn’t mean it. not in the way he wanted you to. and that made it worse. that fucking shattered him.
jungwon shot up from his chair like a bullet, his heart hammering against his chest, the rage swallowing him whole. his body trembled, his hands clenched into fists so tight his knuckles turned white. he couldn’t sit still, couldn’t keep the frustration bottled up. pacing back and forth, his muscles burned, stretched to their limit as he swung his arms wildly, desperate for some kind of release. every breath was shallow, sharp, as if he was trying to breathe through the suffocating pressure building inside him. but nothing was working. without thinking, he grabbed the closest thing in reach—a small figurine on his desk—and hurled it against the wall with a guttural shout. the sound of it shattering into pieces, scattering across the floor, barely registered in his mind. it did nothing to ease the tension coiling tighter, suffocating him. it wasn’t enough. nothing was enough.
"fuck, fuck, fuck!" he snarled under his breath, dragging his hands through his hair, yanking hard at the strands in frustration. the sharp pain barely registered. his chest was heaving, the walls of his room closing in on him, making it harder to breathe. you were killing him. he couldn’t stop thinking about you—your stupid fucking smile, the way you looked at jay, the way you teased like you didn’t even realize what you were doing to him. it was eating him alive. the urge to check the live feed clawed at his mind, gnawing at his last shreds of self-control. his body practically collapsed back into the chair, hands shaking as his fingers hovered over the mouse, ready to click, ready to see you again. but he couldn’t do it. couldn’t give in. with a growl of frustration, he slammed his fist down on the desk, the sharp sting shooting through his knuckles barely enough to register. the pain was a welcome distraction from the ache burning inside him. “why the fuck did you say that?” he whispered, voice cracking with resentment. “you don’t mean it. you don’t fucking mean it.”
the words tasted bitter on his tongue as he stared at the empty desktop, his breathing uneven, his pulse pounding in his ears. you’d called him hot like it was nothing, like it was just a throwaway comment, and yet, here he was—burning from the inside out, unraveling because of you. how many times had you stood in front of him, drunk and completely clueless, without realizing just how deeply you’d twisted him up inside? it was like you enjoyed torturing him, like you knew he was at your mercy and didn’t care. his hand twitched toward the nearby beer, his throat dry from the anger that kept simmering, boiling over. with a quick flick, he cracked it open, foam spilling over the edge as he downed half of it in one long gulp, desperate for something—anything—to numb the pain cutting into him. the bitter taste coated his mouth, his lips curling in disgust as he wiped them with the back of his hand. jay. it always came back to fucking jay. jungwon downed the rest of the beer, slamming the empty can onto the desk so hard the noise echoed through the room. his head dropped into his hands, shoulders trembling as the weight of it all crushed him, pressing down until he couldn’t take it anymore. “fuck.”
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jay had slipped into your life so easily, it was almost hard to remember a time when he wasn’t around. he visited often now, seamlessly fitting into your friend group, and even got close with jake and sunghoon. it felt like he’d always been there, like he belonged. jungwon, though, had been a different story. after that night, after everything, he’d been distant for a while. but now? now, he sat right next to jay on the couch, controller in hand, eyes glued to the xbox screen like nothing had ever happened. he seemed fine—more than fine, actually. like he’d accepted everything, like he wasn’t even phased by the way jay had embedded himself into your world. tonight wasn’t any different. jay was over again, sitting in his usual spot, and everyone else was gathered in the living room too. the sound of the xbox filled the space, a low hum of explosions and gunfire. jake was sprawled on one couch, half-asleep with a soda can dangling from his hand, while sunghoon sat on the floor, shoving popcorn into his mouth like he hadn’t eaten in days. you perched on the arm of the couch, watching jay and jungwon play another round of whatever shooting game they’d gotten into. it was almost funny—how easily they got along now, how the tension that once lingered between them had melted away. "we're crushing it," jay laughed, glancing at jungwon with a grin.
jungwon cracked a rare, genuine smile, his eyes still on the screen. "don’t get cocky," he muttered, smirking. "you only won 'cause i carried." jay nudged him with his elbow, his grin widening. “team effort, man.” you couldn’t help but smile, watching the way they bantered so naturally. jungwon, the one who usually kept his cool, had loosened up around jay in a way you hadn’t expected. maybe it was surprising how quickly they’d become friends, but it was a relief too. “you two make a good team,” you teased, swinging your legs over the edge of the couch, your voice light, trying to ignore the small tug of something in your chest. “yeah, guess i don’t mind him hanging around,” jungwon said, shaking his head with a small laugh, like he couldn’t quite believe it either. jay shot you a teasing grin. “wow, jungwon actually tolerates me now. i must be doing something right.” jungwon rolled his eyes, but the smirk on his face made it clear he didn’t mind the teasing. “don’t get too comfortable.” jake, who had been half-listening, suddenly perked up, pointing lazily at the screen. “jungwon’s just mad 'cause jay’s better at the game now. remember the first time he played? total trash.” “not trash,” jay argued, raising his hands defensively. “just... learning.”
jungwon chuckled, leaning back into the couch. "yeah, yeah. let's see if you can hold your own in the next round." it was weird seeing jungwon like this—so relaxed, so easygoing. he was always the serious one, the one who kept things close to his chest. but around jay? it was like the walls he usually built around himself had crumbled. “so, when’s the next big project at work?” sunghoon asked between mouthfuls of popcorn. "you two have basically been glued to your desks." you laughed softly, shaking your head. “we’re almost done, thank god. then maybe we can actually hang out like normal people again.” jay smiled, his voice warm and casual. “yeah, maybe we can all do something. outside of work for a change.” jake grinned, tossing a pillow across the room at jay. “you gonna pay for dinner, rich boy?” jay caught the pillow, laughing. “guess i’m buying.” jungwon laughed too, shaking his head at the back-and-forth. "yeah, you owe us." for a second, everything felt perfect. like the puzzle pieces of your life had finally clicked into place. jay was here, a part of it all, and jungwon—jungwon had accepted it. accepted him. it should’ve been a relief, but something about the whole thing gnawed at you. jungwon’s shift in attitude, the way he seemed so... okay with everything. it was too sudden. too easy. but you shoved the thought aside. maybe it was nothing. maybe you were overthinking it. “all right, rematch?” jay suggested, glancing at jungwon with a playful smirk.
jungwon grabbed his controller again, eyes gleaming with determination. “let’s do it.” they dove back into the game, and as the laughter and playful insults filled the room, you sat back, content for the moment. but that small, nagging voice in the back of your mind wouldn’t go away. jungwon’s sudden acceptance felt... off. like there was more under the surface, something he wasn’t saying. you shook the thought away, focusing on the present. jay and jungwon were getting along, and that was enough. for now. “hey,” jay’s voice broke through your thoughts, pulling you back to the room. “you’re up next, right?” you grinned, feeling the weight lift from your shoulders for a moment. “oh, i’m definitely taking you down.” the room was filled with laughter again, and as the game continued, you tried to let yourself believe that this—right here—was how things were supposed to be. but somewhere deep down, you couldn’t shake the feeling that it was all just a little too perfect.
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you and jay were both at the office, the hum of workday chatter filling the background. jay sat beside you at the office like he belonged there. he was on his break, lazily fiddling with a rubik’s cube, his brow furrowed as if it took real concentration, but you could feel his eyes darting to you every few seconds. that signature smirk lingered on his lips, like he had something else on his mind. “you ever solve one of these?” jay asked, twisting the cube with a sharp click. you laughed softly, shaking your head. “nope, never had the patience.” just as you were about to send off an email, your phone buzzed against the desk. you glanced down at the screen. jake: hey y/n, we’re taking jungwon out for drinks tonight! your eyebrows shot up. jungwon? drinks? that wasn’t something that happened often. you tapped a quick reply, but the thought lingered, pulling at your attention. he wasn’t exactly the most social guy, especially when it came to drinking. curiosity piqued, you quickly typed back a response. “what’s up?” jay asked, his voice cutting through your thoughts. his eyes tracked your every move, fingers still idly playing with the cube. “just jake,” you said, leaning back in your chair, tapping the phone lightly against your thigh. “they’re taking jungwon out for drinks tonight. guess he’s warming up to being social.” jay smirked, tossing the rubik’s cube onto the desk and crossing his arms. “he’s been pretty chill lately, especially with me. didn’t think that’d happen.” “me neither,” you admitted, your gaze shifting fully to jay. “he’s always been kinda... closed off, but now it’s like he’s finally enjoying being around people. especially you.”
jay shrugged, though you could see the flicker of pride in his eyes. “guess i’m just that irresistible, huh?” you rolled your eyes, but smiled all the same. “yeah, sure, that must be it.” you leaned in closer, dropping your voice. “but seriously, it’s nice seeing him open up. he’s been through a lot, and seeing him happy... well, it makes me happy.” the conversation lulled for a moment, the office noise fading into the background. jay’s fingers drummed softly on the desk, and you could feel him thinking, like there was something on his mind he hadn’t said yet. “speaking of happy...” jay started, his voice quieter, more thoughtful now. “this might be... really bad timing, but i’ve been wanting to ask you something.” you raised an eyebrow, intrigued but slightly cautious. “oh? what’s up?”
he hesitated for a beat, his eyes locking with yours. gone was the teasing smirk, replaced with something more sincere, something that had your pulse picking up speed. “i was wondering...” jay leaned in just a little, the space between you two feeling more intimate, more personal. “would you wanna go out with me tonight? like... on a real date?” your heart did a quick somersault. jay had always been playful, teasing, but this? this was different. this was real—just him, asking you out with none of the usual jokes to hide behind. “an actual date?” you echoed, your voice soft as a smile began tugging at your lips. jay nodded, his fingers now absentmindedly tracing the edge of the desk, like he needed something to focus on besides your reaction. “yeah. i mean, we’ve hung out a lot, but i want to take you out properly. no more just hanging out at your place.” warmth bloomed in your chest, spreading through your body as nerves fluttered in your stomach. jay had always made you feel comfortable, always been someone who could make you laugh, but now he was offering something more. something you hadn’t even realized you’d been waiting for.
“i’d like that,” you said softly, your smile growing wider. “yeah, i’d really like that.” jay’s entire expression lit up, the tension in his shoulders melting away as relief washed over him. “really?” “really,” you confirmed, feeling the flutter of anticipation start to build inside you. he let out a breath, grinning wide as he leaned back, his confidence slipping back into place. “all right, guess i’ll have to plan something good then.” you laughed, shaking your head. “no pressure or anything.” “trust me,” jay chuckled, though the warmth in his eyes now had your pulse racing even faster. “i’ve got it covered.” the office seemed to fade away as you both sat there, the moment stretching between you, feeling just right. like this was exactly where you were supposed to be. “tonight, then,” jay said, his eyes never leaving yours. “tonight,” you echoed, feeling the weight of the promise in your own voice.
jay stood up, stretching a little before throwing you a glance over his shoulder. “oh, and wear my favorite,” he added, his tone dropping a little, laced with something more suggestive. you blinked, your smile faltering for just a second. “your favorite?” jay smirked, leaning closer, his breath brushing your ear as he whispered, “baby blue.” the memory of the set he was referring to flashed in your mind—the one you’d worn in a photo that had gotten a reaction out of him before. your cheeks flushed, the air between you two thickening with the weight of suggestion. “oh, that set.” “yeah... that one.” his fingers brushed against your arm, just barely grazing your skin, leaving a trail of heat in their wake before he turned, heading back to his desk. the light touch, the way his voice had dropped—it left you breathless, heart pounding against your chest. anticipation simmered under your skin, and you couldn’t stop the grin from spreading across your face as you stared at your computer screen, already counting down the hours until tonight.
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the apartment was buzzing with the usual pre-party energy when you got home, the low hum of excitement filtering through the walls. jungwon was already half-dressed, moving through the space like he had all the time in the world, while you rushed, desperately trying to get ready in time for your date with jay. “ugh, i’m running so late,” you muttered, throwing a glance at the mirror, your nerves on full display. nothing felt right, nothing was working, and time was running out. jungwon paused, leaning against his doorframe with that familiar smirk playing on his lips. “nervous for the big date?” his tone dripped with amusement, eyes trailing lazily over your frazzled state. “yeah,” you muttered, rifling through your drawer with a touch of panic. “jay’s picking me up soon, and i need to look perfect.” jungwon’s eyes flickered to the bed, where you’d laid out your baby blue lingerie—the set you knew jay liked. the comment came before he could stop himself. “nice choice.” his voice sounded casual, but you didn’t catch the way his eyes darkened as he stared at the delicate fabric. you barely glanced up, focused on finding the right shoes. “yeah, jay loves this one. figured it’d be a nice surprise.”
jungwon’s jaw clenched. jay’s favorite? something ugly coiled in his chest, why the hell should jay get that? he felt his phone buzz in his pocket—jake, impatient as ever, reminding him to hurry up. jungwon's gaze lingered on the lingerie for another moment, and then, he made his move. while you were still distracted, jungwon slipped into your room, pretending to grab his jacket. with one swift motion, he swiped the baby blue panties from the bed and stuffed them into his pocket. his heart pounded, but outwardly he remained calm, collected. “you seen my—” you turned, catching jungwon mid-movement as he pulled on his jacket, already halfway to the door. “oh, you’re leaving already?” you asked, still half-focused on getting yourself together. “yeah, jake’s blowing up my phone,” jungwon said, flashing you a quick, cool smile, his hand pressing the stolen lace deeper into his pocket. “good luck with your date. i’m sure jay’ll love that surprise.” “thanks,” you mumbled absentmindedly, not even looking up as you fumbled with your outfit. "have fun with the guys." as soon as jungwon was gone, you turned back to the bed, reaching for the lingerie. but something was wrong. the panties were missing.
"what the hell...?" you muttered, confused, rifling through the covers and around the room. i just put them here. you tore through your drawers, irritation bubbling up as your search turned up nothing. “ugh, whatever,” you muttered under your breath, deciding on the black lace set instead. the clock was ticking, and the last thing you needed was to be late. jay won’t mind, you told yourself, trying to push aside the frustration, but a nagging feeling of something missing lingered. jungwon, on the other hand, was already out the door, heading to meet jake and sunghoon, the baby blue panties securely tucked into his jacket pocket.
that small act gave him a twisted sense of control, a flicker of satisfaction, but beneath it all, a cold wave of futility crept in. what the fuck is this even for? he wondered, but couldn’t stop himself. it wouldn’t change a damn thing between you and jay. stealing your lingerie, messing with your plans—none of it would stop the fact that you’d be with him tonight. yet, knowing you wouldn’t be wearing that special set for jay, his favorite set, felt like a small, fucked-up victory. as the elevator doors slid shut, jungwon caught a glimpse of his reflection. what the hell am i doing? he ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head, but the question didn’t matter anymore. you’re not wearing that for jay, and that was enough to ease the coil of frustration in his chest. sliding into the backseat of jake’s car, jungwon’s mood clashed against the upbeat energy of the others. jake and sunghoon were hyped, laughing, planning out their night, but jungwon barely heard them. his fingers drifted to the pocket where the soft lace sat, his mind replaying the moment he’d swiped them from your bed, the way you’d been too distracted to notice.
his hand moved absentmindedly, tracing the delicate fabric as jake’s voice rambled on about which club to hit first. you’ll never even suspect me, he thought, a smug satisfaction settling in. there was no way you’d ever connect jungwon to your missing panties. that innocent, oblivious part of you wouldn’t even consider it. he leaned back in his seat, letting the rush of adrenaline mix with the twisted satisfaction that came from knowing you’d be out with jay tonight—wearing something else. completely unaware of what was missing. and in that moment, despite everything, jungwon felt like he was winning.
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jungwon slouched back in the booth, the relentless thrum of the club’s bass pounding through his chest. lights flickered, neon blues and purples flashing across the crowded dance floor, but it all blurred together into a scene he couldn’t care less about. the chatter, the laughter, the sweaty bodies swaying to the beat—it was suffocating, only reminding him of everything he didn’t want to think about. he didn’t want to be here. hell, he didn’t want to be anywhere. but jake and sunghoon had dragged him out, practically forcing him to "get out of his head." now, here he was, at some fancy table heeseung had hooked them up with, surrounded by people celebrating god knows what. “lighten up, man.” jake nudged him, grinning as he took another swig from his beer. “heeseung pulled some strings for this, we should be having fun.” “yeah,” sunghoon leaned back, tossing a casual smirk his way. “it’s not like you’ve got anything better to do.” jungwon barely managed a tight smile, they meant well, but it didn’t change the fact that he felt like he was suffocating. sitting here, pretending to enjoy himself, it was like the weight of everything was pressing harder on his chest. sure, it was better than being back at the flat, buried in your bed, breathing in the faint scent of your perfume from the pillow you’d left behind. a little less pathetic, maybe. but being here wasn’t much better. because here, he couldn’t escape the thoughts, the images playing over and over in his mind. you with jay.
“you good?” jake asked, his voice cutting through jungwon’s thoughts. his brow furrowed as he glanced over, clearly picking up on the tension rolling off him. “you’ve been weird all night.” jungwon’s response was quick, sharper than he meant it to be. “i’m fine.” he exhaled, trying to push down the frustration that threatened to spill over. no, i’m not fucking fine. sunghoon raised a brow, exchanging a glance with jake. “dude, you always say that. you’ve been holed up in your room for days. what’s gives?” jungwon didn’t answer. how could he explain it? how could he tell them that every time you walked out that door, it felt like a piece of him left with you? every time you left, he’d retreat to your room, curling up in your bed, clinging to whatever was left of you. burying his face in your clothes, pretending, even for just a few moments, that you were still there. it was fucked up. he knew that. but it was the only way to deal with the rage.
this night was supposed to be an escape. a distraction from the thoughts that tortured him, from the idea of you with him. but all it did was amplify it. with every drink, every laugh, every passing moment, he could feel the jealousy tightening around his throat like a noose. because no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t stop seeing it—you and jay. your laughter, your smile, the way you’d look at jay like he was your whole world. the way jungwon wished, more than anything, you’d look at him. he squeezed his eyes shut, wishing the pounding bass of the club could drown out the thoughts, the sickening ache in his chest. but it didn’t. he hated it. hated that no matter where he was, no matter what he did, it was always you. always jay. and it was destroying him from the inside out. jungwon watched as jake and sunghoon disappeared onto the dance floor, their laughter swallowed by the thumping bass and flashing lights. he was left alone, gripping his drink tightly, the alcohol buzzed through his veins, but it wasn’t enough to quiet the ache burning in his chest.
he missed you. god, he missed you so much it fucking hurt. his fingers slipped into his jacket pocket, brushing against the soft lace of your stolen panties, the secret that no one else knew about. but even that, even taking something so personal from you, felt useless. he missed the way you used to burst into his room unannounced, complaining about your day or teasing him for never leaving the apartment. he missed the way you leaned against him when you were too tired to hold your head up but refused to leave. now, everything felt distant, cold. and this drink? it was doing fuck all to help. and then, he saw you. jungwon’s heart leapt into his throat, his pulse racing as his eyes locked on you, stepping into the club like you owned the room. for a split second, hope flared, blinding and irrational. maybe you’d come looking for him, maybe you missed him too. his lips twitched, the beginning of a smile breaking free. but then he saw him. jay.
that flicker of hope was crushed under the weight of reality. jay, walking in behind you, his hand resting at the small of your back like he fucking owned you. like you were his. something twisted deep in jungwon’s gut, the jealousy simmering hotter now, searing through him. his hand clenched around the glass, the edges pressing into his palm as he watched jay guide you through the crowd, his touch too casual, too possessive. it was like a punch to the gut, knocking the breath right out of him. his mind screamed, desperate to believe this wasn’t happening, that you hadn’t already slipped away from him. but watching jay pull you closer, seeing how easily you leaned into him, jungwon knew. jay was winning. jungwon drained his drink, the alcohol burning down his throat, but it did nothing to numb the burn in his chest. seeing you like this—in that fucking dress, looking so perfect it made him want to tear something apart—it was unbearable. he wondered if you were wearing the black or white lingerie he knew you loved. or maybe something else. maybe something jay had picked out for you. his jaw tightened as he kept his eyes on you, unwilling to look away. he stayed rooted to the spot, slipping into the shadows where he could watch without being seen. from there, he could see everything—every touch, every smile, every laugh you gave to jay like it was his right.
from a distance, it was easier to let the jealousy fester, to let it simmer and burn without having to fake a smile, without pretending everything was okay. his smirk returned, dark and twisted, as he watched jay pull you closer, his hand sliding down to rest on your hip. you were his now, weren’t you? the thought twisted deeper, like a knife in his chest. jungwon leaned against the wall, his eyes never leaving you, waiting for something—anything—to break. he let the jealousy, the rage, boil inside him, his fingers tracing over the lace hidden in his pocket, the one thing he had taken from you, something only he knew about. he glanced at jake and sunghoon, who were lost somewhere in the back, wrapped around a couple of girls, laughing and whispering in their ears like they had no worries in the world. good. let them leave. he didn’t need their company tonight. tonight was about you. his eyes snapped back to you, and the sight made his stomach churn. you were laughing, leaning into jay, your hand resting on his arm like it was the most natural thing in the world. he fucking hated jay. he wanted to hate jay. he wanted to find something, anything, that would make him feel justified for the burning jealousy tearing him apart. but he couldn’t. no matter how hard he tried, jay was… perfect. and worst of all? jay made you happy. that’s what killed him the most.
because no matter how much he wanted you, no matter how much he needed you, jungwon knew deep down he would never be the one to make you happy like that. he’d never make you smile like jay did, never make you laugh like that, never be enough. and it fucking destroyed him. he leaned back into the shadows, eyes fixed on you, watching, waiting, stewing in his jealousy, his rage, his desperation.
he would never let you go. jungwon had called it. barely a few minutes after he slipped into the shadows, jake and sunghoon came stumbling back over to where he’d been sitting, girls hanging off their arms, wide smiles and flushed cheeks. they didn’t even have to say anything—the looks on their faces said it all. jake raised an eyebrow, smirking, while sunghoon winked, sealing the unspoken deal. they were about to make their exit. jungwon’s phone buzzed in his pocket. he didn’t even need to look, already knowing what it would say. sure enough, there were texts from both of them. jake: bro, we’re heading out, see you later? sunghoon: you good? catch you tomorrow.
a bitter chuckle slipped out before he could stop it. he quickly typed out a reply, already drained by their carefree energy. jungwon: already left. have fun. from his hidden spot, he watched as jake and sunghoon exchanged glances, glancing around like they might actually give a shit about where he was before shrugging it off. they disappeared into the crowd with their arms slung around the girls, laughing like they had the night in the palm of their hands. good riddance. now he didn’t have to fake a damn thing. no more keeping up appearances, no more pretending. now he could stay hidden, drown in cheap liquor, and watch the night unfold the way he knew it would.
“hey, handsome.” the voice was low, sultry, but it grated against jungwon’s nerves like nails on a chalkboard. he barely noticed her at first, until she was right up against him, pressing her body close, her fingers trailing lightly across his chest. he glanced down at her with cold, empty eyes. the dim lighting of the club cast shadows across her face, but even in the dark, he could see the desperation gleaming in her eyes, the too-eager smile playing on her lips. she had been watching him all night, and now, she finally thought she had her chance. without a word, jungwon reached up and gently pushed her hand away, his fingers curling around her wrist for just a second before letting go. “don’t.” his voice was flat, emotionless, his gaze already drifting back to where you were standing with jay. but the girl didn’t take the hint. she leaned in closer, her breath hot against his neck. “come on, don’t be like that. you look like you could use some company.” his jaw clenched, the retort he wanted to spit out getting stuck in his throat. he took a step back, creating some distance, but she followed him, her hands reaching for him again like she hadn’t just been told off. “i said don’t,” he snapped this time, his voice sharp, cold. jungwon’s patience was already wearing thin. “what’s your problem?” she pouted, her fingers still brushing against his chest, her body pressing even closer. “you’re just sitting here all alone. let me make you feel better.” jungwon’s eyes flicked back to her, darkening. “you reek,” he said bluntly, his tone icy. the girl blinked, caught off guard. “uh, excuse me?” “if you keep touching me, you’re gonna fucking regret it.”
she laughed nervously, her confidence cracking as uncertainty flickered in her eyes. “wow, okay. someone’s got issues.” jungwon leaned in, his face inches from hers, his voice dropping to a dangerous whisper. “are you my stepsister?” her expression twisted in confusion, a nervous laugh escaping her lips. “uh, what? no, what does that even—" jungwon’s lips curled into a cruel smirk, the intensity of his gaze making her instinctively step back. “nothing. but next time you push yourself on someone, maybe think twice.” she stared at him, her bravado crumbling under the weight of his words. her face twisted in disgust as she backed off, muttering, “you’re fucking weird,” before turning and disappearing into the crowd. he didn’t watch her leave. didn’t care. his focus was already elsewhere. he knocked back another shot, the alcohol scorching down his throat, his eyes locked on you again.
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later that night, jay picked you up, looking effortlessly perfect in his usual style—black jeans, a fitted shirt that hugged his body in all the right places, and that smug grin that never seemed to leave his face. you’d dressed for the occasion, slipping into a sleek, curve-hugging dress that made you feel confident, sexy, a little daring. as the two of you made your way to the club he’d picked for the evening, you chuckled under your breath, taking in the neon lights and feeling the thrumming bass vibrating beneath your feet. “really? a club?” you teased, glancing at him with a raised eyebrow. “what kind of gentleman brings a woman to a club on their first date?” jay smirked, his hand casually sliding to the small of your back, guiding you inside. “a gentleman who knows how jealous you got every time our colleagues went clubbing while we were stuck at work.” your eyebrow shot up, surprised he’d picked up on that. “i didn’t think you paid attention.” jay leaned in close, his voice dropping just low enough to make your skin tingle. “trust me, y/n, i notice everything about you.” his words sent a rush through you, a blush creeping up your neck as you smiled and shook your head, trying to play it cool. despite the loud music and the bustling crowd, something about this felt perfect. you nudged him playfully. “okay, maybe you do have some charm after all.” jay grinned wider, pulling you closer as the two of you moved through the dimly lit space. “some charm? come on, i’ve got plenty.” you couldn’t help but smile, feeling the pull of his energy. he led you to a table near the edge of the dance floor, the music loud enough to shake your bones, but instead of overwhelming you, it seemed to ground you. jay sat close, his hand resting possessively on your thigh under the table, sending little sparks of excitement through your body.
“so, what do you think?” jay leaned in, his breath warm against your ear. “better than the office, right?” you laughed, feeling the weight of the moment settle between you. “okay, fine, you win. better than the office. but only because you knew i was jealous.” jay’s grin widened, and for a second, his eyes darkened with something deeper. “hey, just trying to keep my girl happy,” he said smoothly, the words slipping out so easily they made your heart skip a beat. before you could overthink it, he was pulling you to your feet, leading you toward the dance floor. “come on, let’s dance,” he urged, tugging you into the crowd. the two of you fell into a rhythm easily, your bodies moving together in sync with the pulsing music. the tension between you grew with every beat, every movement, jay’s hands firm on your hips, pulling you against him. the heat of his body mixed with the electric energy of the club, making it impossible to think of anything else. as the lights flickered and danced across the walls, jay pressed closer, his hands sliding lower, his touch lingering in a way that made it clear you were his tonight. and god, you loved it—loved the way he made you feel alive, reckless, like nothing else mattered but the two of you. the alcohol was hitting now, loosening your inhibitions, making everything a little hazier, a little more intense. you laughed more, leaned into jay’s touch more, feeling lighter, freer. the air between you was thick with something more than just fun, and jay’s breath against your neck as he moved with you only made it harder to ignore the tension building between you. “you good?” he teased, his lips brushing against your ear, his hands roaming dangerously low. “better than good,” you grinned, your voice playful but laced with desire. “you?” jay chuckled, his hips pressing harder into yours. “i think you know the answer to that.” the night became a blur of dancing, shots, laughter, and more teasing touches. at some point, as you ground your hips back against jay, you felt the unmistakable hardness pressing against your lower back. the heat pooled in your stomach, and without thinking, you threw a playful glance over your shoulder. “oops,” you said with a smirk, teasing him. jay raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. “oops?” he repeated, his tone dripping with sarcasm. “that’s all you’ve got to say?” you bit your lip, still moving against him, testing how far you could push. “what? i thought you were supposed to be a gentleman?”
jay groaned softly, his hands tightening on your hips. “gentleman or not, you keep grinding on me like that,” he murmured into your ear, his voice dark and rough, “and i might forget all my manners.” your heart raced, loving the way you were pushing him. “oh really?” you whispered, turning just enough for your lips to brush against his cheek. “so, what are you gonna do about it?” his eyes darkened further, and all the teasing vanished from his expression. his hand slid around your waist, pulling you closer, his body flush against yours. “you sure you wanna test me, y/n?” his voice was low, a dangerous edge to it that made your pulse quicken. you swallowed hard, but you couldn’t resist pushing him further. “i dunno,” you whispered, still teasing. “i kinda like seeing you like this.” jay’s chuckle was dark, low in his throat. “you think you’re cute, don’t you?” he muttered, pressing harder against you. “grinding on me, saying ‘oops’ like it’s nothing.” your pulse quickened, your body reacting to every word, every touch. “maybe,” you breathed. “maybe i thought you could handle it.” his lips grazed your neck, sending a shiver down your spine. “i can handle it,” he murmured, “but can you?” you turned in his arms, your bodies still swaying to the music, faces inches apart. his eyes were dark with desire, the teasing grin gone. “so much for being a gentleman,” you whispered. jay smirked, pulling you tighter. “even a gentleman has his limits, y/n.”
the heat between you both was almost unbearable now, the tension so thick it was suffocating. you leaned in closer, lips brushing his ear as you whispered, “by the way... i didn’t end up wearing your favorite tonight.” jay raised an eyebrow, his voice low and rough as he pressed his hips harder into yours. “oh yeah?” he murmured, “good thing i’m gonna be ripping them off anyway.” his words sent a thrill down your spine, and before you could respond, his lips crashed against yours, hot and desperate. the kiss was messy, consuming, tongues tangling as you both finally gave in to the tension that had been building all night. your hands fisted in his shirt, pulling him closer, your body arching into his as he groaned into your mouth.
but as you got lost in jay’s touch, you were completely unaware of the dark eyes watching you from the shadows. jungwon sat back, his drink forgotten, his vision narrowing until all he could see was you and jay—your hands all over each other, your lips locked in a kiss that made his blood boil. he felt nothing but pure, unfiltered rage. you pulled away from jay, breathless, your lips swollen from the kiss. “we should get out of here,” jay whispered, his voice rough with need. “yeah, let’s go back to mine,” you agreed, running a hand through your hair, still catching your breath. jungwon’s world spun. he couldn’t hear the words, but he saw it all—the way your body language shifted, the way you and jay talked, like you were about to leave. like you were going home together. his stomach twisted, bile rising in his throat. you were about to leave with jay. you were going to go home with him. jungwon shoved through the crowd, his mind racing. he couldn’t let this happen. he had to get home first, had to do something before you and jay got there. before something happened that he couldn’t stop. his hands clenched into fists as he stormed toward the exit.
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jungwon barely made it. he’d fucking sprinted the whole way, the flat wasn’t far from the club, but every second felt like it stretched into an eternity. his chest was tight, lungs burning as he raced, a sickening mix of desperation and fury pushing him harder. he knew you too well—knew you wouldn’t bother going far. not when you looked like you were ready to be fucked the moment you left that dance floor. the thought twisted his gut, but it also fueled him. he had to move faster. had to stop it. he burst into the flat, his breath ragged, each step slamming against the floor, reverberating through the walls. there was no fucking time. he stormed straight to his room, the door slamming so hard behind him it rattled the frame. his mind raced, pulse thundering in his ears, each thought more fucked up than the last. every step forward felt like he was spiraling deeper into madness, but he didn’t care. he stumbled over to his desk, fingers trembling, yanking the drawer open so hard it nearly came off the tracks. inside, neatly tucked away, was the fully charged battery he always kept on standby. his hands shook as he grabbed it, almost dropping it in his frantic state. no time to waste. he bolted down the hall, his feet barely hitting the floor, his heart slamming against his ribcage. your room. he shoved the door open, eyes wild as he stormed inside. everything felt too slow, too fucking slow. he tore the old battery out of the hidden camera lodged in the eye of the teddy bear on your dresser. his hands fumbled, slipping as nerves made him clumsy, cursing under his breath. “fuck, come on,” he hissed, voice low, barely containing the panic that was surging up his throat.
finally, the new battery clicked into place, and the camera blinked to life, the red light staring back at him. jungwon stood there for a moment, frozen, staring at the tiny lens. his breath was shallow, chest heaving. his entire body felt like it was on the verge of breaking apart. soon, too soon, you and jay would walk through that door. and he’d have to watch it. all of it. the thought sent a wave of nausea crashing over him, and for a second, he thought he might actually be sick. but he swallowed it down, fists clenched so tight his knuckles turned white, and stormed back to his room. the door slammed shut behind him, the sound echoing through the flat like a gunshot, but he didn’t give a fuck. he dropped into his chair, fingers trembling as he flipped open his laptop. the screen flickered to life, casting a harsh glow across his face. he waited, breath caught in his throat, until the live feed blinked onto the screen—your bedroom, empty, waiting for what would happen next. but it wasn’t enough. not for this. his mind was racing too fast, spinning out of control. he knew you wouldn’t just stay in the bedroom, not with jay. you’d move, probably to the kitchen, the couch—wherever things got heated next. he couldn’t fucking risk it.
jungwon shot up from his chair, grabbing another small camera he had stashed away for emergencies. this was it. this was the emergency. sprinting down the hall, he made his way to the kitchen, eyes scanning the room for the perfect spot. his gaze landed on a shelf near the counter, cluttered with just enough shit to hide the camera. he positioned it meticulously, adjusting it until it captured everything—the counter, the table, the couch, all of it. he stood back, staring at the tiny lens nestled among the clutter, knowing it would record every fucking thing that happened tonight. jungwon rushed back to his room, his body vibrating with adrenaline. he slammed himself down in front of the laptop, hands shaking as he switched the live feed back on. the screen split into two—your bedroom, the kitchen. every angle covered. he could see it all now. his breath came in sharp, shallow bursts as the weight of what he’d done settled over him like a heavy fog. his pulse thundered in his ears, his heart hammering against his ribs. all that was left to do was wait. wait for you and jay to walk through that door. and then watch. watch it all unfold, every fucked up second of it. he wasn’t sure if he wanted to scream, break something, or just let the rage consume him entirely. but he would wait. and he would fucking watch.
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you and jay stumbled down the street, the night air biting at your skin, but you barely noticed it—too caught up in the alcohol buzz and the warmth of jay pressed up against you. his arm was draped lazily over your shoulders, fingers teasing the back of your neck as he whispered something in your ear, something filthy that made you laugh too loud, breathless. the world around you blurred, nothing mattered except him—his scent, the way his fingers lingered a little too long at the small of your back, sending heat rushing through you. you were both drunk, careless, and the electricity between you crackled like it was ready to explode. before you knew it, the flat loomed in front of you, your feet carrying you faster than your mind could keep up. the walk was too quick, too easy, like you both knew exactly where this was headed. lights off, no one home, the night was yours. and his. no need for keys, no time for second thoughts. the door clicked shut behind you, and before you could even blink, jay was on you, hands everywhere, lips crashing into yours with a hunger that knocked the air out of your lungs. your back slammed against the wall, and you gasped, not from pain but from the sheer intensity of it all. “fuck,” jay muttered into your mouth, his hands already gripping your waist, dragging you against him like he’d been holding back all night. “been waiting for this.” you let out a breathy laugh, tipping your head back to give him better access to your neck, his lips quick to find the sensitive skin there. “could tell,” you teased, tugging at his shirt, fingers twisting in the fabric. “impatient, aren’t you?”
his teeth grazed your neck, and you moaned, barely able to form coherent thoughts as his hands wandered lower, rough, desperate. “can you blame me?” his voice was low, thick with desire, breath hot against your skin. “i know you want it just as bad.” you let out a shaky laugh, your chest heaving as his fingers trailed dangerously close to the hem of your dress. “confident, aren’t you?” jay grinned against your skin, his hands sliding up your thighs, gripping them tight enough to leave marks. “i’d call it certainty,” he breathed into your ear, teeth grazing the shell of it. “i know exactly what you want.” your heart pounded in your chest, the heat between you two thickening, suffocating. you turned, eyes locking with his, daring him, testing him. “prove it.” he didn’t need to be told twice. his lips slammed back against yours, slower now, but deeper, as if he was trying to drown you in the kiss. his teeth tugged at your lower lip before pulling back, a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth as his hands roamed lower. with one sharp motion, he grabbed the fabric of your dress and ripped it, the sound echoing in the dark hallway. “jay!” you gasped, half-shocked, half-amused as you looked down at the ruined dress. “i liked that dress.” he smirked, unbothered, lips grazing yours again, his hands rough against your bare skin. “i’ll buy you a new one,” he muttered, eyes dark with lust, his fingers already sliding under the waistband of your panties.
you were breathless, heat pooling low in your belly as his hands wandered further, fingers ghosting over the spot that had you aching for him. “reckless bastard,” you muttered, but the thrill was unmistakable in your voice. his lips found your neck again, sucking hard enough to bruise, and you moaned, your hands tangling in his hair, tugging him closer, urging him on. the world outside of this moment didn’t exist, not the flat, not the night, not the possibility of anyone walking in. it was just you and him, and the growing tension between you that felt like it was about to snap. just as you were ready to lose yourself completely in him, jay pulled back, breath ragged, eyes dark. “wait… jungwon,” he muttered, voice thick with desire. “think he’s home?” the mention of your stepbrother brought reality crashing down, if only for a second. you blinked, your pulse still racing, body still pressed tight against jay’s. jungwon. he was supposed to be out with jake and sunghoon, but… “i don’t think so,” you mumbled, uncertainty creeping into your voice. “he’s out with the guys, but…”
jay’s hands tightened on your waist, a low chuckle rumbling from his chest. “then who gives a shit?” his voice was low, teasing. “even if he is home, we’ll just be quiet.” he smirked, leaning in closer, lips brushing your ear. “unless you want him to hear.” your breath hitched, the idea sending a shiver down your spine. the thought of jungwon walking in, seeing you like this, made you tense—but it also sent a thrill through you, something dark, something exciting. you bit your lip, glancing at jay. “he’d understand… right?” jay grinned, pulling you closer, his lips ghosting over yours. “trust me,” he whispered, voice low, filled with promise. “he won’t care. and if he does… we’ll just have to be quieter, won't we?” "take it off already," you demanded, pushing the thought of jungwon away, voice thick with desire as your fingers played at the hem of jay’s shirt. jay gave you that cocky grin, effortlessly peeling it off, exposing the hard lines of his bare chest to your touch. his skin was warm under your fingertips, and jay's grin only widened as he watched you take him in. your hands roamed over his chest, lingering, exploring, before trailing lower. "impatient tonight, aren’t we?" jay teased, his voice dripping with amusement as he leaned closer, his lips hovering dangerously close to yours.
"maybe," you shot back, playful, eyes daring him. "or maybe you're just taking too long." jay chuckled, his lips finally pressing against yours, hard and hungry. his hands slid over your body, pulling you closer, making you arch into him as he deepened the kiss. the way he touched you, like he couldn’t get enough, sent a heat through your veins, every brush of his fingers leaving you wanting more. his lips traveled down your neck, leaving a trail of heat in their wake. you moaned softly, fingers digging into his shoulders as he worked his way lower, his hands moving over every curve, every dip, like he was claiming you for himself. "you’re not comfortable, are you?" jay’s voice was a low, teasing murmur against your skin as his fingers traced the edges of your dress. you let out a breathy laugh, your fingers trailing across his chest. "i’ll manage. not like you’re giving me much of a chance to complain, are you?" jay smirked, lips brushing yours again, this time rougher, more impatient. "guess i’m not," he murmured, teeth grazing your lips as he pulled you closer. "but if you wanted to switch it up, i wouldn’t mind." his hands slid down to your hips, pulling you flush against him. "is that right?" you teased, pushing back slightly, enjoying the way his body tensed under your touch. "and where do you want me, then?" jay’s voice dropped, thick with want, his eyes dark with lust as he stared at you. "anywhere i can fuck you properly." your lips curved into a smile as you tugged at his waistband. "then maybe you should hurry up and get those off, too, hmm?" jay stepped back just enough to undo his belt, the sound of it hitting the floor echoing through the room. you leaned back against the counter, watching him with a playful smirk, the tension between you building with every second.
as his pants hit the floor, jay paused for a moment, his eyes meeting yours, that wicked grin still tugging at the corners of his lips. "let’s go to my room," you whispered, pulling him toward you as you slipped off the counter. jay’s eyes flickered with hunger, his hands never leaving your body as you led him down the hallway, the heat between you nearly unbearable as you disappeared into the dark.
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in the dim glow of his room, jungwon’s jaw tightened. jay's smug voice grated against his ears. "smug fucking bastard," he snarled, teeth grinding, voice low and dripping with venom. he couldn't tear his eyes away, couldn’t stop himself from watching even though it was killing him inside. every move jay made felt like a taunt, a mockery of everything jungwon had ever wanted. the sight of jay’s hands on you—touching, claiming—was like acid burning through his veins. “you think you’re better than me? fuck you.” he hissed, his voice barely a whisper but sharp enough to cut. his heart hammered against his ribs, chest tight with the fury that bubbled up with every second. jay stripping you of the dress? that was his touch you should be feeling, his lips you should be kissing, not jay's. "you think you can just walk in and take her?" his vision blurred with white-hot anger, teeth sinking into his lip until he tasted blood. watching jay move, touch, and claim—jungwon's body trembled with how badly he wanted to tear it all apart. it wasn’t supposed to be like this.
his breath hitched as jay’s hands traveled lower, his body pressed against yours like he owned you. he fucking doesn’t. jungwon’s mind raced, his thoughts spiraling into an obsession he couldn’t control. i should be the one touching her. i should be the one kissing her like that. he couldn’t stop replaying it over and over—picturing himself in jay’s place, imagining how you would react to him instead. it should’ve been him pulling you close, feeling your body beneath his hands, hearing you whisper his name, not fucking jay. "i’ll make him pay," jungwon growled, voice hoarse with suppressed rage. his fingers twitched, itching to smash something, anything to stop this scene from unfolding in front of him. every breath jay took next to you felt like an insult, like he was stealing something that belonged to jungwon, ripping it right out of his hands. “fucking... asshole,” jungwon spat, chest rising and falling heavily, eyes fixed on jay’s stupid grin as he undid his belt. jungwon’s breath came faster, fury boiling over at how casual, how easy jay made it seem. like you were nothing more than something to pass the time with. he doesn’t deserve you. he’ll never fucking deserve you. when you tugged jay toward your room, jungwon’s breath hitched again, the room spinning around him. his room. his space. he was the one who should be walking down that hallway with you, not jay. he should be the one hearing your laugh, feeling your fingers pulling him close.
as jay disappeared with you down the hall, jungwon leaned back, cracking his knuckles one by one, eyes never leaving the screen. this isn’t over. not by a long shot. his vision blurred, eyes burning with the sting of unshed tears, but the anger—the fucking anger—that was stronger than anything else. jungwon leaned back, cracking his neck, a twisted smile forming on his lips. just wait. he would wait, watch, and when the time came, he’d destroy everything. everything jay thought he had. everything. you don’t even know what she needs. you’ll never be enough for her, he thought viciously, his mind racing with the sickening idea of tearing it all down. every bit of jay’s hold over you, he would destroy it. piece by piece. with one last look at the screen, jungwon’s hand reached for the mouse. the live feed flickered, showing your room, the kitchen, all the places you and jay might go. all the places jungwon would be waiting.
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as you opened the door to your room, jay was on you before you even had the chance to take a step inside. his hands gripped your waist with that urgency you knew so well, lifting you like you weighed nothing and tossing you onto the bed with a cocky smirk that made your heart race. you couldn’t help the laugh that escaped you, your body sinking into the soft sheets, but it didn’t last long. jay was already between your legs, grabbing your ankle, pulling you closer to the edge of the bed until your thighs dangled off. his eyes were dark, hungry, like he couldn’t wait another second. your ripped dress barely hung on your body, teasing him with flashes of skin, and his fingers brushed the hem, slowly pushing it up as his gaze followed. he was taking his time, but you could see it in his eyes—he wanted to devour you. “you’re driving me fucking insane,” he muttered, his voice rough as his lips ghosted over your inner thigh. the heat between your legs was unbearable now, and the way his breath brushed your skin made you squirm. impatient, you slipped your panties off and tossed them aside, your body trembling with need. jay’s eyes flicked up to meet yours, his lips curling into a wicked grin. “oh? i was planning to rip those off myself.” he raised an eyebrow, teasing you. you giggled breathlessly. “good thing i didn’t wear the baby blue ones, huh?”
his chuckle was low, filled with mischief. “oh, i wouldn’t have dared... but these? yeah, they had to go.” his fingers traced your wet folds, teasing just enough to make your breath hitch, and you could feel the tension building in the pit of your stomach. “you’ve been waiting for this, haven’t you?” his voice was rough, full of desire as his fingers slid inside you, slow, deliberate, making you gasp. “like your pussy hasn’t been fucked in forever.” the heat of his words sent a wave of pleasure through you, your back arching as his thumb found your clit, circling with just enough pressure to make you tremble. “fuck,” you whimpered, gripping the sheets beneath you, your body practically melting under his touch. “that’s it,” he whispered, his lips brushing against your ear, his fingers working you over. “i’m gonna make up for all that lost time.” you moaned, unable to form a coherent response as his fingers curled inside you, each stroke pulling you deeper into a haze of pleasure. every movement, every touch had you unraveling, breathless and trembling. “i thought you were a gentleman,” you managed to say, your voice barely more than a sigh, pleasure clouding your thoughts. jay’s grin against your skin sent shivers down your spine. “who said i’m not?” his fingers continued their relentless rhythm. “maybe i’m just giving you exactly what you’ve wanted this whole time.”
he leaned back slightly, his hands trailing up to your breasts, thumbs brushing over your hardened nipples as he watched you squirm beneath him. “fuck, you’re so pretty,” he murmured, his voice thick with desire. before you could respond, his mouth was on your nipple, his tongue flicking over it, and you gasped, your back arching into him. the heat between you both was unbearable now, the thin fabric of his boxers doing little to hide just how hard he was. your legs wrapped around his waist instinctively, pulling him closer, your body aching for more. “move up,” you breathed, your hands tugging at his shoulders, needing him closer, needing more of him. jay groaned low in his throat, lifting himself just enough to adjust, sliding up over your body until he was fully on the bed, his weight pressing down on you in a way that made your whole body hum with anticipation. his lips found your neck, kissing, biting, sending sparks of pleasure through you. “better?” his voice was rough, strained with desire as he settled between your thighs again. “so much better,” you gasped, your nails digging into his back, urging him closer, needing him more than ever.
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jungwon sat at his desk, elbows digging into the wood, fingers gripping his hair so tightly it felt like he might rip it out. his bloodshot eyes were locked onto the screen, the harsh light of his laptop casting deep shadows across his tired, hollow face. no matter how much his eyes burned, how dry his throat felt from panting, he couldn’t look away. his breath came in ragged gasps, mouth slightly open as he stared, feeling like the ground beneath him was crumbling. this couldn’t be real. it felt like a nightmare, one he couldn’t wake up from, watching jay touch you like that—watching you give in so easily, moaning under him, arching into his touch like you couldn’t get enough. “fuck,” jungwon whispered, voice shaky, his fists clenching tighter in his hair, trying to ground himself in the pain. maybe if he pulled hard enough, he’d snap out of this. maybe if he hurt enough, it’d drown out the scene playing in front of him.
but nothing worked. his body betrayed him. despite the anger boiling in his chest, he could feel himself hardening, his breath becoming more erratic as jay’s lips wrapped around your nipple, sucking, teasing, while you whimpered beneath him. jungwon’s vision blurred with rage, but there was something else too—something sick. something he couldn’t stop. “sucking on your tits like that...” jungwon muttered through gritted teeth, his voice low, venomous, watching jay's hands grip your waist, watching how easily you surrendered to him. it twisted jungwon’s stomach, made him feel disgusted with himself, but still—he kept watching. he always watched. he’d watched you before—seen you with other guys through teddy’s eyes. it killed him every time, watching you with someone else, but this? this was different. jay was different. jungwon had never let himself go this far before, never crossed that line. never touched himself while watching. there had always been that line, the one he swore he’d never cross, no matter how much it hurt.
but this time, his hand hovered closer, trembling. jay was different. he hated it. hated how fucking good jay was. he could see it—could fucking feel it—how much more desperate you were, how much more you needed jay. jungwon’s jaw clenched so hard he thought his teeth might crack. you were never like this with anyone else. “you’ve never fucking been like this before,” jungwon growled, fists shaking, eyes burning into the screen as your fingers tangled in jay’s hair, pulling him closer, your moans louder, more frantic. it was unbearable. you were never this desperate with anyone else. never this needy. the realization hit him like a punch to the gut: jay might even be better than him. something inside him snapped. the line he’d drawn for himself—the line that kept him from fully diving into this twisted, fucked-up obsession—blurred, then shattered completely. his hand shook as it moved toward his pants, his body acting on its own. there was no going back now. fuck it.
“no, no, no,” he hissed, frustration tearing through him, raw and suffocating. “why can’t you see? why the fuck can’t it be me?” the overwhelming urge to destroy something—anything—burned in his chest. he wanted to reach through the screen, rip jay away from you, stop this entire scene, but instead, his shaky hands fumbled for something else. your panties. fresh from the wash, but it didn’t matter. they were yours. they were enough. he brought them to his face, inhaling deeply, desperate for any trace of you, needing the connection, no matter how fucked up it was. his teeth bit down on the fabric, muffling the growl building in his chest, eyes glued to the screen, watching you, watching jay, feeling his whole body tremble with want, jealousy, and pure need. his hand moved lower, gripping his cock for the first time, unable to stop himself, unable to tear his gaze away from the scene unfolding before him. this should be me. why isn’t it me? "i’m just letting him borrow you," he whispered, breath ragged, hand moving desperately now as his eyes stayed fixed on you. "you’re mine."
"i'll make fucking sure of it," he gasped, his voice trembling, eyes rolling back as he struggled to keep watching. you were flipping jay over so easily, like you had all the control. like you were playing a game. “been wanting to suck your cock for the longest time now…” your voice, low and teasing, drifted through the speakers, and it sent him spiraling. his hand moved faster, strangled moans tearing from his throat as he watched you lower yourself between jay’s legs, that cheeky grin lighting up your face like you were enjoying every second of it. fuck. "shit," jungwon groaned, his breath shaky, watching as you took jay into your mouth, the obscene wet sounds filling the room, driving him closer to madness. “you should be doing that to me,” jungwon whimpered, his voice barely above a whisper, barely able to breathe. that should be him there, not fucking jay. the sight of you on your knees, lips wrapped around jay’s cock, burned into his mind, making his hand move faster, more frantic. “i’m the one who’s been waiting… not him,” he spat, pressing your panties harder against his cock, the fabric rubbing against him, heightening the sensation until he could barely think straight. jay’s groans filled the room, his hand cupping your cheek as you teased the tip of his cock, swirling your tongue around him slowly, making him tremble. jay’s breath hitched, voice thick with lust.
“shit… just suck me off,” jay’s voice was raw, impatience laced with desire. “or i swear, i’ll fuck you right now.” jungwon’s jaw tightened, his teeth grinding together as he watched you hold all the power over jay, completely in control. you had him wrapped around your finger. you smirked, dragging your tongue along the length of jay’s cock, savoring how his hips jerked forward, desperate for more, desperate for you. “y/n,” jay growled, voice heavy with need. “don’t make me wait.” and you didn’t. with that sly smile still on your face, you took him deeper, hollowing your cheeks, your hands gripping his thighs, steadying yourself as you worked him. “oh, fuck,” jay muttered, his hands tangling in your hair, pulling you closer, thrusting deeper. “shit, is this okay?” his voice was strained, trembling. “want to fuck your mouth, baby, will you let me?” the low moan you gave around his cock made jay groan, his hips bucking into your mouth, his control slipping, each thrust more eager, more desperate. he wasn’t waiting anymore—he was fucking your mouth now, deeper, harder with each motion. jungwon’s breath hitched, his strokes becoming frantic as he watched jay’s cock moving deeper into your throat, every sound, every moan, every whimper pushing him closer to the edge. he wasn’t going to last. not like this. not watching you like this.
he’s completely lost in it now, hands gripping your head firmly as he thrusts into your throat, groaning with every deep stroke, the sound of your muffled squeals driving him wild. “that’s it,” jay gasps, voice shaky, breath coming fast as he watches you struggle to take him, your lips stretched tight around his cock, tears welling up at the corners of your eyes. the wet, obscene sounds between you both fill the room, slick and needy, making him moan in satisfaction. "you sound so pretty like this," jay rasps, his hand tightening in your hair, controlling your movements as he thrusts deeper. “look at you, taking my cock so well… you love it, don’t you? love how filthy this is?” you try to nod, eyes rolling back as you gag slightly, the raw need in his voice only turning you on more. jay leans back, biting his lip, clearly getting off on the sight of you choking on him, watching as your throat struggles to handle his size. “you’re a fucking dream, baby,” he mutters, voice rough with lust. “you gonna let me keep fucking that pretty mouth? yeah?” he doesn’t wait for an answer. his hips move faster, his cock sliding in and out of your mouth with each thrust, more desperate, more intense with every second. you grip the sides of his thighs, nails digging into his skin as you feel him pulse in your mouth, his cock swelling as he nears the edge.
but just when you think he’s about to finish, jay abruptly pulls you off him. you cough, gasping for air, eyes tear-stained, cheeks flushed, and saliva trailing from your lips down to his cock. you barely have a moment to catch your breath before jay growls. “come here,” he demands, voice thick with urgency as he pulls you into his lap, positioning you to straddle him, knees pressing into the mattress on either side of his hips. the second your bodies connect, his mouth crashes against yours, kissing you hard, teeth scraping against your lips as his hands grip your waist, fingers digging into your skin like he can’t get enough of you. before you know it, he’s flipping you onto your back, his body hovering over you, hands roaming your skin, rough and needy. his cock presses against your entrance, teasing you as he drags the tip through your slick folds, just brushing against your core but refusing to give you what you’re aching for. “beg,” jay growls, his lips brushing your ear, breath hot against your skin as he holds himself right there, torturing you with the anticipation. “i wanna hear you beg for it.”
your body arches toward him, the heat between your legs unbearable as your voice trembles, “please, jay… fuck me.” his smirk deepens, fingers digging into your waist as he pushes in just enough to make you feel the stretch but not enough to satisfy. “not good enough,” he murmurs, voice teasing as he hovers on the edge. “tell me how bad you want it.” you whimper, nails biting into his shoulders as you gasp, “please, i need you… i need you to fuck me open, jay… i want it so bad.” he groans, the sound guttural as he slides just the tip of his cock inside, your soaked pussy immediately clenching around him. “shit,” jay mutters, inching his way in slowly, eyes locked on yours as he watches your face twist in pleasure. “didn’t think you’d be this tight, baby. you’ve been waiting for this, haven’t you?” your breath is shaky, jaw slack as he stretches you inch by inch. it’s almost too much, your fingers gripping the sheets beneath you as you struggle to adjust to his size. “jay,” you whimper, your body tensing as he bottoms out, his cock buried deep inside you. the intensity makes you yelp, your body instinctively trying to pull away.
he grips your hips tighter, holding you in place, a wicked grin spreading across his face. “where do you think you’re going?” he taunts. “thought you wanted this. wanted me to fuck you like this. you’re not running now.” “wait,” you manage to smile through the haze, breath uneven as you try to adjust to the stretch. “you’re… big.” jay’s grin widens, eyes glinting with pride. “you can take it,” he growls, rolling his hips slowly, teasing you with the slightest movements. “look at your pussy getting all stretched out for me.” your body responds immediately, legs trembling as he starts moving again, setting a rhythm that has you gasping for air, toes curling with every thrust. jay bites his lower lip, watching you struggle to take him, the sight of you barely holding on only spurring him on. he can’t help himself.
“harder?” jay chuckled, teasing, as he leaned back and adjusted his grip on the back of your thighs, spreading your legs wider. his weight pressed down on you, pinning you to the bed, completely at his mercy. your hands scrambled for something to hold onto, anything to steady yourself as the shift in position made you feel every inch of him more intensely. each deep thrust sent shockwaves through your body, forcing you to arch up, gasping for air. jay looked down at you, eyes dark with lust as he took in the sight—you, wrecked beneath him, panting, completely undone. he loved it. loved the way you looked like this, completely under him. now, with your legs spread even wider, he could feel so much more of you, every inch of your slick pussy gripping him tighter. “fuck... you feel that?” jay stuttered, his voice thick with pleasure as his pace quickened, hips slamming into you harder. “i can feel every part of you like this... shit, you’re taking me so fucking deep.” your moans were ragged, desperate, each one louder than the last as the pleasure crashed over you, your body arching off the bed with every powerful thrust. “jay... oh my god…” he smirked, watching you struggle beneath him, gripping your thighs tighter, spreading you open even more. “that’s right, baby,” he growled, his voice rough. “you’re gonna take it all... every inch of me.” you could only whimper, his pace brutal, relentless, driving you closer and closer to the edge. each thrust had you quivering, spiraling beneath him as he pounded into you, taking you apart with each stroke. “you love this, don’t you?” jay breathed, eyes burning with lust as he watched your body react to every movement. “you love being fucked like this…”
you managed a weak nod, your voice barely a whisper through the overwhelming pleasure. “yes... fuck, jay... i love it…” jungwon’s grip tightened around his cock, jerking himself off even though his stomach and thighs were already a sticky mess of cum. your panties, soaked and sticky with his release, dragged over his shaft, the fabric clinging to him as he pumped faster, his hand shaking. “fuck…” he hissed, barely able to get the word out, teeth clenched as he watched jay slam into you, each thrust harder, deeper. every sound you made almost tore him apart, his body jerking like he could feel it, like he was the one fucking you. "look at you... getting fucked dumb on his cock," jungwon’s voice cracked, bitter and desperate, a twisted mix of jealousy and arousal tearing through him. his strokes turned frantic, jerking himself harder, faster, like if he could go hard enough, fast enough, he could make it real—make it him instead of jay. his stomach clenched, head thrown back, legs trembling as he imagined it was him inside you. “you’d feel so much better with me,” he growled under his breath, his hand moving faster, frustration boiling over. “i’d fuck you better than him,” jungwon choked out, barely more than a growl. his cock throbbed in his hand as he imagined you screaming his name, wanting him the way you wanted jay. “you’d fucking see…” your moans, the way you shook, the way you screamed—jungwon was losing it. he wanted that. needed that. his body tensed as another orgasm ripped through him, spilling over the already soaked panties. jay was relentless, slamming into you so hard you could barely breathe, your entire body trembling, feeling light-headed with pleasure as you teetered on the edge of release.
jungwon could see it, could feel it in his bones. his breath hitched as he watched, hating the sight of jay inside you, filling you when it should’ve been him. “shit, your pussy’s too good,” jay grunted, his voice strained as he thrust into you harder. suddenly, he pulled out, leaving you gasping, your body aching for more, already too wound up. “not yet,” jay whispered against your lips, teasing you with the faintest brush of his mouth before pulling back. his hand tapped your thigh, commanding you to move. before you could even think, jay flipped you onto your stomach, positioning you like you were nothing more than a toy to him. his hands gripped your hips tight, lifting you the way he liked, preparing to take you all over again.
out of nowhere, jay’s hand cracked down on your ass, the sharp slap echoing through the room. you yelped, the sting rippling into a wave of pleasure that lit your body on fire. “fuck,” you whimpered, biting your lip, wanting more. “you like that?” jay’s voice was rough, dripping with lust as he knelt behind you, his hands kneading your ass before delivering another sharp smack. “look at you, already missing my cock.” your moans were muffled by the pillow, your body trembling as your hips pushed back, desperate for him to fill you again. he lined up, teasing your entrance, barely brushing against you, making you squirm. “jay, please,” you begged, voice breathless, needy. he chuckled low, letting the head of his cock tease you, dragging it along your slick folds, enough to make you squirm but never giving you what you needed. “tell me how much you want it,” he growled, his lips ghosting over your ear, his voice filled with desire. “put it back in,” you whined, pressing back against him, trying to take him in yourself. but jay only smirked, pulling away just enough to enjoy your frustration. his chest pressed against your back, his cock dragging torturously over your slick folds, teasing you without mercy. his breath was hot on your neck as he whispered, “you want it that bad?” you bit your lip, holding back, but when he nudged just the tip inside and pulled out again, your body jolted, your pride cracking. “jay, please,” you murmured, voice trembling with need, the ache between your legs growing unbearable. his dark chuckle brushed against your skin, his lips grazing your neck. “c’mon, y/n… say it,” he teased, giving you another shallow thrust, pulling back just as quickly. “you know you want it.”
your nails dug into the sheets, frustration building as your control slipped. “i want it, please,” you gasped, breath shaky. “fuck my pussy... give it to me.” his grin widened against your skin, and he pulled back just enough to line himself up, lips close to your ear. “then take it,” he growled, slamming into you hard and deep in one brutal thrust, making you scream into the pillow. “oh god—jay,” you cried, voice muffled, body shaking beneath him as his teeth sank into your shoulder, the sharp pain mixing with overwhelming pleasure. “fuck,” jay groaned, his breath ragged against your skin. “wanted to take you out on a proper date, but you had to grind on me at the club.” his voice was low, growling between each brutal thrust, the slap of skin filling the room, drowning out your desperate moans as your body quivered beneath his weight. “couldn’t help it,” you choked out, voice breaking between gasps. “you looked so fucking good.” jay’s grip on your waist tightened, his pace relentless, fucking you harder, making you scream as waves of pleasure rolled through you. “goddamn, y/n… you’re driving me fucking insane.” “i finally…” you panted, voice barely coherent, “broke you, didn’t i? you fuck like an animal.”
jay growled low, his hands gripping your hips hard enough to bruise. “maybe you did,” he muttered, voice raw with need. “look what you fucking do to me.” his words sent a shiver down your spine, pushing you closer to the edge as his thrusts became more desperate, more intense. “you wanted this,” he growled, his breath hot against your neck, his chest heavy on your back. “you wanted me like this, didn’t you?” you tried to hold back the moans, but he was so deep inside you, every thrust pushing you closer to the brink. “yes,” you gasped, nails clawing at the sheets. “yes, jay, don’t stop—keep fucking me.” his grunts grew louder, his pace brutal as he chased his release, lips brushing yours in a messy, heated kiss. his hips stuttered, rhythm faltering as he reached his limit, overwhelmed by how much you wanted him, how you took everything he gave like you were made for him. “fuck, i’m so close,” he groaned, voice strained. “gonna pull out, baby.” but you shook your head, legs wrapping tighter around him. “no,” you whispered, breathless but firm. “just—give it to me. i want all of it.” jay’s breath hitched, body trembling as he tried to hold on. “fuck, you're serious?” he rasped, control slipping. you nodded, licking your lips, urging him to let go, needing him to finish inside you.
your nails dug deeper into the sheets, your body trembling as you gasped, “don’t pull out… cum in my pussy… fill me up.” his grip tightened, his voice wrecked. “you’ll make me get you pregnant, baby,” he groaned, eyes dark with lust, staring down at you. “god, you’re fucking killing me.” you nodded, desperate, voice barely audible. “i… i’ll take care of it,” you moaned, meeting his thrusts. “just- please, inside me. you’re fucking me so good, want it—” “oh fuck, y/n,” jay growled, pushing in deep as his body shook, coming hard inside you, filling you with everything he had. “take it,” jay grunted, his voice raw, body jerking against you one last time as the heat flooded you. even as he finished, you kept grinding against him, milking every drop from him. his body trembled, his moans turning helpless as he collapsed on top of you, completely spent. “shit… stop moving, baby,” jay gasped, but even as the words left his mouth, his body couldn’t stay still, still trembling as he held you tighter, keeping himself buried deep inside you.
his breath was hot against your neck, heart pounding hard enough that you could feel it against your back. soft kisses trailed along your shoulder, his lips warm, gentle, as his body slowly came down from the high. “i’m sensitive,” jay muttered, his voice low and intimate, a softness creeping into the words as he shifted, turning both of you so you were curled into him, still connected. his cock twitched inside you, the aftershocks of his release sending shivers through his body. he held you close, arms tight around your waist, his fingers lazily tracing patterns on your skin as the two of you lay there in silence. “i’m not going anywhere,” he whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the back of your neck, his voice a quiet promise. you shifted slightly, wincing at the overstimulation, making jay groan. “ugh, that was so fucking good,” you mumbled, your voice muffled against his chest. “don’t move,” he groaned, tightening his grip on you, his arms possessive. “don’t wanna pull out yet.” you stayed tangled together, limbs entwined, the warmth of post-orgasm settling into your bones. the only sound in the room was the steady rhythm of your breathing, occasionally broken by soft laughs as you both tried to process what had just happened. jay shifted beside you, still warm, pulling you even closer as if he couldn’t stand to be apart from you. his fingers brushed lightly over your waist, and you felt your eyelids growing heavier, the peaceful haze of sleep starting to take over.
“mm, y/n?” his voice was soft, thick with sleep as he nuzzled into your neck, his breath warm against your skin. “yeah?” you mumbled, your voice hoarse. “you okay?” “just couldn’t get comfortable for a second,” he murmured, pressing a lazy kiss to your shoulder. “sorry, you can go back to sleep, baby.” the word “baby” made you smile, but you were too exhausted to tease him for it. his affection was clear, and it warmed you from the inside out. but as your mind began to wander, a nagging thought crept in—jungwon. you hadn’t heard from him since last night, and a small part of you couldn’t help but wonder where he was, if he was okay. you tried to push the thought away, but it lingered, pulling you out of the comfortable haze. “what time is it?” you asked softly, not really expecting an answer, just needing a distraction. “still early,” jay murmured, pressing his lips against your neck again. “don’t worry about it.”
you tried to relax, to let his warmth lull you back to sleep, but your mind kept circling back to jungwon. “did jungwon ever get home?” you whispered, the question slipping out before you could stop it. jay shifted beside you, his arm tightening around your waist slightly. “jungwon?” he muttered, still drowsy. “i dunno… didn’t hear him come in.” you bit your lip, unease gnawing at you. jungwon had gone out with jake and sunghoon, and usually, he would at least text if he wasn’t coming back. but your phone was somewhere on the floor, and jay had you wrapped so tightly you couldn’t reach it. still, something didn’t feel right. “he’ll be fine, y/n,” jay murmured, sensing your tension even half-asleep. his voice was soothing, but it didn’t fully ease the anxious twist in your stomach. “yeah, you’re probably right,” you whispered, though the unease remained. you snuggled back against him, trying to let the comfort of his presence calm you, but your mind kept wandering back to jungwon. jay shifted again, and this time his voice was softer, more hesitant. “y/n?” he began quietly, his breath brushing against your neck. “would you be mad if i told you i like you so fucking much?” his words snapped you out of your thoughts, your heart skipping a beat. “mad?” you turned slightly to look at him, a small smile tugging at your lips. “why would i be mad?”
he sighed, rubbing gentle circles on your side as he met your eyes. “i dunno. maybe ‘cause i’m saying it now... after we just, you know, had sex for the first time.” he chuckled awkwardly. “kinda feels like i should’ve said it before all of this.” you couldn’t help but laugh softly at his honesty, your fingers brushing lightly against his chest. “you did call me your girl earlier, remember?” you teased, easing the tension with a playful smile. he grinned, rolling his eyes. “yeah, real smooth, huh?” “so smooth,” you laughed quietly, shaking your head as the weight of the moment lifted between you. he leaned in closer, his forehead resting against yours, his voice softer now. “but seriously... i like you. a lot. more than i thought i would.” his confession made your chest warm, and your heart beat a little faster. “i like you too, jay,” you admitted, your fingers tracing patterns on his skin. “and no, i’m not mad.” relief washed over his face, and his smile widened as he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. “good. ‘cause i really don’t wanna fuck this up.” “you’re not,” you whispered, leaning in to kiss him gently, reassuring him. for now, in this moment, everything between the two of you felt right—even if your mind kept drifting back to jungwon. jay sighed, content, pulling you even closer, his body relaxing against yours. but as sleep started to creep back in, that small thought of jungwon lingered in the background, refusing to let go.
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jungwon slumped back in his chair, chest heaving, body drenched in sweat, his skin clammy with the aftermath of how far he'd let himself go. his heart pounded violently, each beat a reminder of the sick desperation that gripped him tighter with every passing second. no matter how many times he came tonight, it wasn’t enough. it never was. the screen had gone black minutes ago, but the sounds—the haunting echoes of your moans and jay’s grunts—played relentlessly in his mind. it felt like they were carved into his skull, on repeat, taunting him, reminding him of every moment he wasn’t there, every time jay had what he craved most. jungwon dragged a trembling hand through his hair, the strands sticking to his damp forehead, his eyes burning with unshed tears. his other hand still clutched your lingerie, the delicate lace now crumpled and soaked with his own cum. disgust surged through him as he stared at the fabric. it felt like a mockery of the connection he so desperately longed for. he let it fall from his fingers, the soft thud of it hitting the keyboard echoing like a final defeat. but the disgust didn’t make the ache in his chest any less real. it clawed at him, gnawing at his insides, threatening to tear him apart from the inside out. how long was he going to do this to himself? how long would he have to watch you give everything to jay? his teeth sank into his lip, hard enough to draw blood, the sharp taste grounding him for just a second before the agony crashed back in, stronger than ever. it wasn’t about the release—never was. the way you begged jay to fuck you harder, to cum inside you—it was a knife twisted in jungwon’s gut, over and over. “fuck…” his voice shook, barely more than a whisper. he hated himself for how much he wanted to blame you. but he couldn’t. he could never hate you, even as every part of him shattered under the weight of it all.
his body trembled, weak from the overstimulation, but his mind was a storm—each thought darker, more desperate. he pushed himself up from the chair, legs barely supporting him as he stumbled toward the bed, collapsing onto it face-first, still half-naked, pants bunched around his thighs. his cock twitched against the sheets, oversensitive and raw, but the pleasure had turned into something hollow, something meaningless. the silence of the room pressed in on him, thick and suffocating. jungwon hugged his pillow tightly, his chest rising and falling with ragged breaths, exhaustion clinging to him, but sleep felt impossibly far. his mind wouldn’t stop racing. how could he ruin this? how could he tear jay down, rip him apart, make sure he could never have you again? thoughts of revenge spiraled in his head, each one darker, more vicious than the last, but nothing felt like enough. nothing matched the depth of the emptiness he felt. he needed to break jay. he needed to make jay feel the same crushing agony that had consumed him for weeks. the same jealousy, the same suffocating helplessness. he needed to make jay feel what it was like to lose everything. with a sharp breath, jungwon slammed his fist into his chest, the impact sending a shock of pain through his ribs, but it did nothing to drown out the ache inside him. if anything, the hollow feeling only grew, spreading through his veins like poison. it wasn’t enough. “fuck!” jungwon gasped, his voice cracking, raw and broken as he punched his chest again, harder this time. his knuckles throbbed from the force, but the pain was futile—useless against the tidal wave of emotion threatening to drown him.
tears welled in his eyes, hot and unrelenting. his hands shook as he gripped his hair, pulling hard, trying to keep the sobs at bay, but it was useless. the dam broke, and a harsh, guttural sob tore from his throat. one after the other, the sobs came, his entire body shaking with the force of them. “no… no…” he whimpered between gasping breaths, the tears streaming down his face, soaking into the pillow beneath him. he had never felt so broken, so pathetic. the sobs wouldn’t stop, his entire body convulsing with each ragged cry, years of frustration, jealousy, and desperation bubbling to the surface all at once. “it’s not fair,” jungwon whimpered, his voice barely audible, choking on the words as they left his lips. “it’s not fucking fair.” “why?” he cried out, voice shattering in the darkness, trembling and fragile. he buried his face deeper into the pillow, trying to muffle the broken sobs that tore from him, but nothing could stop the flood of agony ripping him apart. the pain grew, gnawing at him, spreading through his chest like wildfire, consuming him completely. “i love you,” jungwon whispered, the words trembling, broken, and so full of hurt. “fuck, i love you so much.” but his words fell flat, lost in the empty silence of his room. they hung in the air, unanswered, just like every other desperate plea he’d made. he sobbed harder, the tears coming slower now, but no less painful, each one a bitter reminder that nothing had changed. nothing would change. he lay there for what felt like hours, broken, sobbing into the darkness, waiting for the pain to subside. but it didn’t. it lingered, sharp and unyielding, an open wound that wouldn’t heal. deep down, he knew it never would. he would never escape this.
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days passed, and jungwon became nothing more than a ghost in the apartment, slipping through the cracks, disappearing into the shadows like he was made of them. you never saw him during the day, only heard the faintest shuffle of footsteps late at night, long after you’d gone to bed, when he knew you wouldn’t be around to see him. at first, you thought he wasn’t coming home at all. no signs, no sounds. it was like he’d vanished. but then, in the dead of night, there it was—the creak of a door, the quiet rustle of sheets, the almost imperceptible presence of him trying to remain unseen. he was avoiding you, and you had no idea why. it took you days to work up the courage to knock on his door. you didn’t know what you were expecting, but the silence that greeted you after your hesitant knock made the knot in your chest tighten. “jungwon? you there?” your voice was barely a whisper, pressed against the door like you were afraid of what you might hear. there was no response. just more suffocating silence. you were about to give up, about to turn away, when you heard it—the faintest rustle of movement, sheets shifting, the sound of someone deliberately staying quiet. he was there. he didn’t want to face you. "hey… you’ve been in there for days... are you okay?" you tried again, the ache in your chest making your voice softer, more desperate. nothing. no answer. the silence dragged on, the weight of it pressing down on you until you couldn’t take it anymore. eventually, you walked away, the heavy thud of your footsteps echoing through the empty hallway. the few times you did catch a glimpse of him, it was like seeing a ghost. jungwon would slip past you in the hallway, his head down, shoulders slumped, moving so quickly it was like he couldn’t get away fast enough. he wouldn’t look at you, wouldn’t even acknowledge your presence, like you weren’t there.
his face… god, his face. gaunt, hollowed out, dark circles carved beneath his eyes so deep it looked like he hadn’t slept in weeks. his lips, pale and cracked, barely held together, and his clothes hung loosely on him, like he’d stopped caring about everything—including himself. the jungwon you knew was gone, replaced by this hollow shell, this shadow of a person who had locked himself away so deep inside that you didn’t know how to find him anymore. and then there was that night. you’d woken up thirsty, stumbling into the kitchen for a glass of water, when you found him sitting at the counter. jungwon was just sitting there, staring blankly at the floor, an untouched plate of food in front of him, cold and forgotten. he didn’t move, didn’t acknowledge you when you entered. his stillness was unnerving, like he was frozen in place, trapped in a moment he couldn’t escape from. “jungwon?” you whispered, your voice trembling with concern, hoping, praying he’d respond this time. but he didn’t. he didn’t look up, didn’t flinch. he just sat there, hollow and vacant, like a ghost haunting the room, as if your presence meant nothing to him. and then, just as slowly as he’d appeared, he stood, his movements stiff and robotic, walking past you as if you weren’t even there. like you didn’t exist. for a fleeting moment, you caught a glimpse of his face—the emptiness in his eyes, the haunted look that twisted your gut with worry. it was like staring into a void, like jungwon wasn’t really there at all anymore. whatever was happening inside him, it was consuming him from the inside out, pulling him further and further away from you, into a darkness you couldn’t reach. something was horribly wrong, and no matter how hard you tried to reach him, to break through that impenetrable wall he’d built around himself, jungwon was slipping further and further away, disappearing into a place where you couldn’t follow.
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you found yourself standing in front of jungwon’s door again, hand hovering over the wood, your heart pounding in your chest. this wasn’t the first time, but it felt heavier now, like there was more on the line. you hesitated, teeth sinking into your lip, before finally knocking. just like every other time, there was nothing but silence. the faint hum of the apartment’s air filled the space around you, but from behind that door, it was as if nothing existed. no movement. no sound. no acknowledgment of you.
the tightness in your chest grew, a knot of anxiety settling deep inside. you missed him. the silence, the way he was avoiding you—everything about it felt wrong, like something crucial had been ripped away. you stood there, staring at the door, chewing your lip, debating whether to walk away again, or push through the painful awkwardness. you couldn’t just leave things like this. not with him. “jungwon,” you said softly, your voice barely a whisper, fragile in the quiet hallway. “i’m... i’m worried about you. i don’t know what’s going on, but you’ve been so distant, and it’s not like you. can you please talk to me?” nothing.
the silence on the other side of the door pressed down on you, suffocating. you leaned your forehead against the wood, trying to hold back the swell of frustration and sadness building inside. why wouldn’t he just talk to you? what had changed between you two? you’d always been close, always had that connection. but now? it was like you were invisible. you exhaled shakily, deciding to try a different approach. "i’m going to tell you about my day, okay?" your voice was lighter, like you were forcing a smile even though he couldn’t see it. “i know you probably don’t care right now, but maybe if you hear me out, you’ll feel like talking to me. or at least... listen.” you leaned your body against the door, as if you could get closer to him through it. “i went to work, and it was... fine, i guess. lisa kept annoying me with her gossip, you know how she is. she tried to drag me out for drinks after, but i wasn’t feeling it.” you let out a small laugh, trying to inject some normalcy into the air, like it would remind him of what used to be easy between you two. “i know how much you hate hearing about her, but i don’t have anyone else to vent to right now, so... sorry, you’re stuck with this.”
still, silence. the ache in your chest deepened, but you kept going. “jay’s been away on a business trip. he left a few days ago... and i don’t know, it’s been harder than i thought. him being gone, and now you avoiding me... it’s making everything worse.” your voice cracked, and you hated how vulnerable you sounded, but you couldn’t help it. it was the truth. you felt so alone without jungwon and jay. you always leaned on him when things got hard, but now even he was gone, unreachable. “i miss you,” you finally admitted, voice barely above a whisper, your hand pressing flat against the door, wishing you could feel him on the other side. "i miss how we used to talk, how we’d hang out. i don’t know what happened between us, but... it’s killing me that you’re avoiding me. i just... i need my brother back." you waited, heart hammering, hoping for anything—a sound, a word, something to let you know he was still there. but there was nothing. the silence was thick and unrelenting, swallowing you whole.
your throat tightened, the feeling of helplessness wrapping itself around you. you took a deep breath, giving the door one last soft tap. "i’ll leave you alone now, but... please, jungwon. just talk to me. whenever you’re ready." you turned away, your heart heavy, each step feeling like you were sinking further into a pit. the quiet in the hallway was suffocating, and the weight of jungwon’s absence pressed down harder on you with every second that passed. you missed him, more than you could put into words. the distance between you felt impossible to bridge, and no matter how hard you tried, it only seemed to grow wider. "can you at least try to answer my texts?" you called out, voice softer now, almost pleading, desperation leaking through. you stopped in the middle of the hall, waiting, waiting for something, anything. but the silence stretched on, and the gnawing ache in your chest worsened. nothing.
not a single sound came from his room. it was like he wasn’t even there anymore. you swallowed hard, fighting the lump in your throat, your heart sinking lower with each second that passed without a response. the frustration, the sadness, the helplessness—it weighed on you like a stone, heavy and crushing. you didn’t know how to reach him anymore. you didn’t know how to bring him back. “please, jungwon,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, more to yourself than to him now. you stood there, rooted to the spot, waiting, hoping, wishing for something, anything. but all you got was the same oppressive silence that had surrounded you for days. finally, with a deep sigh, you turned away, that familiar ache settling deeper in your chest, like a hole that couldn’t be filled. each step down the hall felt heavier than the last, your mind racing with all the things you wanted to say but couldn’t. you wanted him back. you wanted your brother back. but he was slipping further away, and you didn’t know how to stop it.
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you sat curled up on the couch, legs tucked beneath you, scrolling through your messages with jay. the conversation had started light, but as the texts went on, you could feel the emptiness creeping in, the sharp realization of how much you missed him gnawing at you.
you: hey... i miss you. feels kinda empty here without you jay: i miss you too, baby. just a few more days and i'll be back before you know it you: ugh, this business trip sucks. feels like forever jay: trust me, i’m counting down the days too you: you better make it up to me when you get back ;) you bit your lip, a smile tugging at the corner of your mouth as you imagined him reading that message. there was a small pause before his reply came in. jay: oh, i will. got something special planned for you. promise. you: now i’m curious... jay: you’ll have to wait and see ;) but don’t worry. it’ll be worth it.
you could practically hear the smirk in his words, and the thought made your chest flutter. as much as you hated being apart, jay always knew how to ease the ache, even if it was just through a few flirty texts. you: wish you were here though... feels off without you around jay: same here. but i’ll be back soon. promise. you: ugh, you’re so positive lol. i wish i had that right now jay: gotta keep the vibes up, babe. we’ll be fine, just a little longer. you: okay, fine... but i still hate it lol jay: you’ll survive. i’ll make it up to you, remember? you: you better...
the conversation made you smile, but the silence around you felt heavier than before. it lingered, pressing down as you stared at the screen, waiting for another response. then:
jay: i’ve got meetings for the next few hours, so i won’t be reachable, okay? you: yeah, okay. good luck, don’t work too hard jay: i’ll try. talk soon, love you. you: love you too. you sighed, putting your phone down, staring at the empty room. jay was right—you’d see him soon—but that didn’t stop the ache. the apartment felt hollow without him, and worse, jungwon was barely speaking to you. what if jungwon was still acting distant when jay came back? maybe jay could help. maybe he’d get jungwon to open up. but for now, you were left alone in the quiet. you chewed on your nail absentmindedly, eyes flicking to the screen, but the movie playing was just background noise, something to fill the silence. after a few moments, you reached for your phone again, scrolling through the unanswered texts you’d sent to jungwon. the long thread of messages, one after another, stared back at you, and each unread line made your heart sink further.
you: hey, you haven’t left your room in days? you: seriously, jungwon, what’s going on? you: are you mad at me? i just want to talk. you: please answer me.
not a single response. you frowned, the tightness in your chest growing, frustration mixing with the sadness that had been building for days. why wouldn’t he just talk to you? part of you wanted to give him space, let him come to you when he was ready, but the longer he stayed away, the more it hurt. with a deep sigh, you opened up another message. you: look, i don’t know what’s going on, but i hate this distance between us. if you need space, fine, but at least let me know you’re okay. you hesitated, staring at the screen, your thumb hovering over the send button. would he even read this? you hit send anyway, the weight of the unsaid words pressing on your chest. after a moment, you typed one last message. you: if you want to talk or just hang out... my door’s open. come to my room if you feel like it. you set your phone down, the silence of the apartment swallowing you whole. without the distraction of the TV, the quiet was deafening, making the emptiness feel so much more real. you glanced at your phone one last time, hoping—wishing—for a reply, but there was nothing. not even a sign that he’d read your messages.
with a soft sigh, you turned off the TV and made your way to your room. the bed creaked softly as you dropped onto it, pulling the blankets around you. your phone lay on the nightstand, screen dark and still, the silence hanging heavy around you. you left the door cracked open, just in case. the apartment was too still, and jungwon’s absence weighed on you like a physical thing. you lay there, staring up at the ceiling, eyes heavy with exhaustion, but sleep didn’t come easily. it was a restless kind of feeling, the kind that left you half-awake, waiting for something that might never come.
and then, the bed dipped. you jolted awake, heart slamming against your ribcage, the remnants of sleep still clouding your vision. you blinked, eyes adjusting to the dim light, and there he was—jungwon. sitting at the edge of your bed, his back turned to you, his posture rigid. “jesus, you fucking scared me,” you muttered, trying to steady the pounding in your chest. he didn’t move, didn’t acknowledge your words. just sat there, like a statue, head bowed, shoulders tense. something was off—really off—and the heavy silence that hung between you only made it worse. you noticed the door was closed. when had that happened? the stillness of the room felt suffocating now, like the air itself was thick with everything left unsaid.
hesitant, you reached out, placing a hand gently on his back. the moment your palm touched him, you felt him flinch, his body reacting to the contact like it was a jolt of electricity. but he didn’t pull away. he stayed there, frozen, his breath catching in his throat before it escaped in a deep, shaky exhale. “please,” you whispered, voice so soft it was almost swallowed by the tension in the room, “don’t shut me out. i miss you.” the words seemed to snap something inside him. jungwon turned his head sharply, eyes wide, and for the first time in a long while, you could see everything—all of it. the raw, unfiltered emotion that he’d been hiding. his eyes shimmered with unshed tears, and though he blinked quickly, trying to hold them back, it was too late. you’d seen the truth. you could feel the hurt radiating from him, almost palpable. “you… miss me?” his voice cracked, disbelief laced in every syllable, as if the very idea of you missing him was foreign, impossible. there was something raw, almost desperate, flickering in his gaze, something that made your heart clench painfully in your chest.
you nodded, your throat tightening, the emotions between you thickening. how had you not noticed? how had you let it get this bad? “wow…” jungwon muttered, running a trembling hand through his hair, visibly trying to keep himself from falling apart. but it was clear he was on the edge, barely holding on. his emotions swirled around him, chaotic and heavy, and you could feel the weight of it pressing on you too. “you just say that, and suddenly… i want to be okay again.” his voice wavered, a bitter laugh bubbling up from deep within him. “isn’t that pathetic?” the laugh was sharp, almost cutting, but beneath it was something so much more fragile, something that hurt to hear.
“what are you talking about?” you whispered, your heart breaking for him in ways you couldn’t quite grasp. his words, his tone—they didn’t match the jungwon you knew. this wasn’t the boy you’d grown up with, the boy who had always been so full of quiet strength. this was someone drowning, lost in emotions that were too big for him to carry alone. without a second thought, you moved closer, your hands gently tugging him toward you. “come here,” you said softly, your voice both an invitation and a plea. you guided him away from the edge, pulling him into you. and this time, he didn’t resist. he let you pull him close, his head resting against your shoulder, his body curling into yours like it had so many times when you were kids, like he was searching for that comfort, that familiarity. your heart swelled, a bittersweet warmth spreading through your chest as you held him. you remembered the times you’d fall asleep together, mid-movie, or after long days spent together. but this... this was different. his breathing was shaky, his body trembling slightly against yours, and you could feel the storm of emotions inside him.
and yet, something else lingered, something that made the air around you feel thicker, heavier. “but you’ll hate me,” he whispered, so quietly you almost didn’t catch it. his voice was so vulnerable, trembling with fear, with something you couldn’t quite place. “hate you?” you echoed, your fingers brushing through his hair gently as you tried to soothe him, tried to understand. “why would i ever hate you?” he didn’t answer right away. his face was still pressed against your chest, but you could feel the shift in him, the tension building. when he finally pulled back to look at you, his eyes were filled with an intensity that made your breath catch.
tears clung to his lashes, but there was something more, something darker in his gaze. his eyes flickered down to your lips, lingering there for a heartbeat too long. your heart stuttered in your chest, a sense of unease washing over you. the closeness between you suddenly felt different, charged in a way that made your stomach twist. “jungwon?” you whispered, your voice barely more than a breath, the question heavy in the air between you. but before you could process the meaning behind his gaze, before you could move or speak again, his grip on your shirt tightened, pulling you even closer. his face was inches from yours now, and then, suddenly, his lips were on yours—soft, shaky, unsure, but insistent. it wasn’t what you expected. it wasn’t what you wanted. but it was happening.
your heart pounded in your chest, panic rising as the kiss fully registered. you pulled away quickly, your breath coming in shallow gasps, hands pushing against him. "what are you doing? stop—no, we can’t!" your voice trembled, desperate to make sense of the overwhelming rush of emotions. but jungwon didn’t stop. his eyes, wide and filled with something raw and unrecognizable, bore into yours. there was a desperation in them, something pleading, frantic. “please, y/n, just listen—” he leaned in again, his voice almost breaking. “no!” you cried, pressing harder against his chest, trying to create space between you. your hands shook as you tried to shove him back, your mind screaming at you that this wasn’t right. “this isn’t right, jungwon! we can’t—”
“but you kissed me back,” he interrupted, his voice cracking as he held your gaze, the hurt in his eyes twisting painfully in your chest. “i know you felt it too. you didn’t pull away right away. you liked it, didn’t you?” his words hit you like a punch, leaving you reeling, the confusion swirling inside you tightening like a knot. “no, i didn’t—” you stammered, shaking your head, trying to shake off the weight of his accusation. how did this even happen? “please,” he whispered, his voice breaking, and before you could react, he leaned in again, his desperation bleeding into every movement. his lips crashed against yours with a force that left you breathless, his tongue forcing its way into your mouth with an intensity that made your head spin. you struggled, hands pushing at him, but his strength overpowered yours. the more you resisted, the harder he pressed, the kiss turning more frantic, more overwhelming. you told yourself to push him away, to stop this before it went any further, but your body… your body wasn’t listening. it froze, paralyzed in the whirlwind of emotions crashing over you. the heat of his touch, the urgency of his kiss—it blurred everything else. for a split second, nothing else existed. it was just his lips, desperate and pleading, and the dizzying sense of wrongness mixing with the confusion in your mind. then, you felt it. his hands slipping under your shirt, fingers grazing the bare skin of your stomach, sending a jolt through you like a cold shock of reality. the haze shattered.
you gasped, pulling away, the air in your lungs burning as the weight of the situation hit you like a ton of bricks. this wasn’t just a kiss anymore. this was something far deeper, something you weren’t ready for. before you could fully react, jungwon moved over you, his body pressing you down into the mattress, caging you beneath him. his weight pinned you in place, his arms braced on either side of your head, trapping you. he kissed you again, more frantic this time, his desperation growing with every second that passed. “jungwon, stop,” you tried to say, but the words barely made it out, muffled by his lips, by the weight of everything that was happening too fast, too intensely. the room felt smaller, closing in around you as his kisses became more urgent, his hands wandering with a hunger that made your skin crawl. you needed to stop this. you had to stop this. but he wasn’t stopping.
"please," jungwon’s voice cracked as he pulled back, a thin trail of saliva connecting your lips, his eyes wide with desperation. "i need you... i need this. don’t leave me alone… not like this.
and then you felt it—his hips pressing against yours, the hard outline of his cock rubbing insistently against your thigh. your body froze, shock rippling through every inch of you. he was so hard, the pressure of him grinding into you undeniable, suffocating. your breath hitched as you felt his desperation, his need, pressing into you like a weight you couldn’t shake. you hated it—the way your skin flushed under his touch, how your body reacted, betraying you. and the look on his face—pained, desperate, so full of need—made it harder to pull away. it made everything harder. his movements became more determined, the friction between you building with each desperate grind of his hips. his head fell back, a low groan tearing from his lips, his jaw slack as if he was already lost to the sensation. his eyes fluttered shut, and just the sight of him like this—grinding against you, looking like he could cum just from that alone—had you crumbling. "wait—" you breathed, voice barely a whisper, trying to regain control, but your own breath was coming in short, uneven gasps, mirroring the intensity he was pressing onto you. it was too much. he was too much. and worst of all—you didn’t completely hate it. and that terrified you.
"please, let me," jungwon begged, his voice rough, full of raw emotion. his eyes burned into yours, overwhelming, trapping you beneath his gaze. his lips trembled as he kissed you again, softer this time, like he was asking for permission with each touch, pleading with you to let him keep going. "i can't," you managed to whisper, shaking your head, trying to fight through the fog of his touch, but your body felt weak, pinned beneath his weight. "you were kissing me back," jungwon insisted, his voice hardening as his lips hovered dangerously close to yours, his breath hot against your skin. “you liked it. don’t deny it.”
"no, jungwon, i—" your voice faltered, struggling to form words, but he pressed his forehead against yours, eyes locking onto yours with a fierce intensity that made it hard to breathe. "you were," he repeated, his hands cupping your face, his fingers trembling against your skin. "stop lying to yourself, y/n." his words twisted inside your chest, sending your thoughts spiraling. the confusion, the guilt—it all mixed with the undeniable pull of the moment, the years of repressed feelings now breaking free, crashing down around you in waves too strong to resist. "this isn’t right," you whispered, your hands gripping his shirt, half trying to push him away, half holding him closer. you were torn, the weight of the situation crashing into the undeniable connection between you.
"but it feels right, doesn’t it?" jungwon murmured, his lips finding yours again, kissing you deeply, slowly, like he was savoring the taste of you, as if this was his last chance. you gasped into the kiss, your hands sliding down to his chest, and for a fleeting moment, you let yourself kiss him back, fully aware of the line you were crossing. but as soon as you did, the weight of reality slammed into you, and you pulled away, breathless, shaking your head. jungwon’s eyes darkened as he hovered over you, his hands roaming your sides, fingers slipping under your shirt, grazing your bare skin. "you don’t hate it,” he whispered, his voice low, dangerous, “i can feel it."
his words slithered into your mind, clouding your thoughts, blurring the lines you had promised yourself you’d never cross. his touch—too close, too much—made you tremble, and the way he looked at you... it was dangerous. your heart pounded in your chest, a frantic beat of fear and something you didn’t want to admit. "this isn’t right... jay—" you started, your voice cracking under the weight of it all, but as soon as you said jay’s name, jungwon’s expression hardened, his jaw clenching. "he's not here. i am." his voice was sharp, final, as he leaned in, dragging his tongue slowly up your neck, making your body shudder involuntarily. "doesn’t it feel good?” his hands roamed rougher now, his fingers sneaking further under your shirt, brushing against your skin with a hunger that was impossible to ignore. “i can make you feel so fucking good... you know i’m right."
his tongue flicked over your ear, making your breath catch in your throat, your gasp betraying you. his mouth moved down to your neck, sucking hard, marking you in a way that made your stomach twist with both guilt and something darker.
you pushed weakly at his shoulders, your hands trembling, but he was stronger, catching your wrists and pinning them down as his mouth continued its slow, torturous path down your body. his nose brushed against your shirt as he lifted it slightly, his tongue dragging in slow, teasing stripes along your stomach like he was savoring every second. you arched into the sensation, a broken moan slipping from your lips, and jungwon groaned in response, the sound of your pleasure spurring him on. just as you felt yourself slipping further, the image of jay flashed in your mind, cold and sobering. jungwon noticed immediately, his eyes snapping up to yours, his expression darkening as he read your thoughts before you could even voice them. "no, no," he whispered, moving back up to your lips, kissing you again, desperate to keep you from pulling away. "you're thinking about him again, aren’t you?" his breath was hot against your ear, his frustration bleeding into his words. “but you’re my brother…” the words slipped out, weak and trembling, as you tried to grasp onto some semblance of reality, something to hold onto, some line that shouldn’t be crossed. your chest tightened, the weight of everything crashing down on you as you looked at him—jungwon, the boy you had grown up with, the person who should have been your safety, your boundary.
jungwon froze for a split second, his eyes locking onto yours, and for a moment, you saw something break inside him—a flash of vulnerability that shattered the hardness in his expression. but it was gone as quickly as it came. his grip on your waist tightened, like he was afraid you’d slip away from him, like losing you was a possibility he couldn’t bear. "i never wanted to be," he whispered, his voice raw, and those five words hit you like a blow to the chest. there was no hesitation, no regret, only a desperate need. his lips found yours again, softer this time but still so urgent, so desperate. he kissed you like he was trying to erase your words, trying to make you forget everything—your boundaries, jay, and the storm of emotions that surrounded you both. your eyes squeezed shut, your entire body trembling as his lips moved against yours. but even as you tried to pull away, he wouldn’t let you retreat. “look at me,” he whispered, his voice shaky yet filled with quiet authority, a plea buried deep within the demand. “please, y/n. look at me.” you kept your eyes shut tight, resisting, clinging to whatever was left of your resolve. “i can’t… i can’t do this to jay,” you breathed, voice barely holding together as you tried to escape the hold jungwon had over you. but jungwon wasn’t stopping. he kissed along your neck, slow, deliberate, each kiss sending a jolt through your body. “jay doesn’t have to know,” he murmured between kisses, his breath hot and ragged against your skin, the warmth of him wrapping around you like a suffocating blanket.
his lips trailed up your cheek, his hands cradling your face with such tenderness it made your heart ache. the contrast of his desperation and his soft touch was overwhelming. he bit down on your bottom lip, gently but firm enough to make you gasp, and before you could stop yourself, a low moan slipped out. he paused at the sound, and in that split second, you felt everything shift. he saw it—the way you were faltering, the way your body was betraying you. “see?” he whispered, his lips hovering inches from yours, his breath mingling with yours. “you want this too.” "he’s not here, y/n. jay doesn’t have to know," jungwon repeated, but this time his voice cracked, and you could hear the rawness in it—the pain, the need. "i’m right here. i’ve always been here." "no..." you whispered weakly, but even you weren’t sure if you believed it anymore. jungwon’s hand slipped down, his fingers sliding under your waistband, finding your soaked core. you gasped, your body betraying you again as his fingers teased you, slipping inside slowly. he groaned softly, his lips curling into a dark smirk as he felt how wet you were. "then why are you so wet for me?" his voice was low, dangerous, as he pushed deeper. "fuck, you’re soaked... all for me."
you whimpered, your body arching into him, even as your mind screamed at you to stop. "why?" you choked out, your voice trembling, your eyes pleading for answers. "why are you doing this?" jungwon pulled his fingers out, bringing them to his mouth, sucking them clean with a groan that sent a shiver down your spine. his eyes locked on yours, full of raw emotion—something deeper, something darker. "because i love you." his confession hung in the air, heavy and suffocating. you stared at him, your heart pounding, your breath catching in your throat as the weight of his words sank in. you hadn’t realized, you hadn’t seen it, hadn’t felt it before. but now? now everything made sense. "jungwon..." you whispered, your hands weakly gripping his shirt, the guilt and confusion twisting tighter around you. "i didn’t know... i didn’t realize..." "you never saw me," he whispered, his voice barely holding together, his lips just inches from yours. the sadness in his eyes was unbearable, cutting through you like a knife. "not the way i needed you to. but i’ve seen you, every single day. every second. i’ve loved you, y/n. even when it fucking hurt, even when i tried to stay away. but i can’t anymore."
his words hit you like a tidal wave, the full force of his heartbreak crashing into you. you could feel it now—the years of silent suffering, the way he’d watched from the shadows, wanting you, needing you, and you never even noticed. it tore at you, unraveling everything you thought you knew. "i... i don’t know what to say," you stammered, your mind spinning, everything unraveling at once. guilt, confusion, and the weight of his confession pressed down on you, suffocating, leaving you gasping for air. "you don’t have to say anything... just let me have you," he whispered, his voice breaking as he leaned in, brushing his lips against yours, soft and hesitant, like he was scared you’d push him away again. "that’s all i’m asking."
his forehead rested against yours, his body trembling as he held you close, his breath uneven, each second stretching out painfully. there was no more hiding. this was him—raw, broken, vulnerable—and he was asking for everything. the guilt hit you hard, like a wave pulling you under. you knew, deep down, that this wasn’t just lust for him. this was years of repressed feelings, of unspoken love, of obsession. he had loved you in silence for so long, and now he was laying it all out in front of you, begging for just a moment of validation, for you to see him. and as you stared into his tear-streaked eyes, you couldn’t deny it anymore. you couldn’t pretend. there had been something between you, once, twice... maybe more times than you wanted to admit. and now, with everything out in the open, it was all crashing down on you. you couldn’t look away. you couldn’t push him away. he was too close, too raw, and every second you stayed, every breath you shared, the line between right and wrong blurred even more. "please," he whispered again, his voice so broken, so full of everything he’d held inside for so long. and as his lips brushed yours again, you felt yourself slipping, falling into him, into the years of unspoken desire and love that had always been there, waiting for you to see it.
"jungwon..." your voice cracked, tears welling up in your eyes. "i’m sorry. i’m so fucking sorry."
the words barely had a chance to settle before you kissed him. your lips crashed into his, the storm of emotions inside you spilling over, unable to hold back any longer. jungwon froze for a split second, his breath hitching, and then he was on you, kissing you back with a desperation that made your heart ache. he groaned against your mouth, his body trembling like this was the moment he’d been waiting for his entire life. and maybe, in his mind, it was. his hands clamped down on your waist, fingers digging into your skin, pulling you so close that you could barely breathe. his kiss was everything—years of longing, of frustration, heartbreak—all spilling out at once. and now that you were kissing him back, now that he had you, it was like something inside him was breaking apart and being put back together at the same time.
he kissed you like it was his last chance, like he was drowning and this was his only way to breathe. his tongue slid into your mouth, greedy, devouring every sound you made, groaning deep in his chest like this was everything he had ever wanted. the meaningless girls, the distractions, none of it had ever come close to this. you were all he had ever wanted. his touch ignited something in you too—something raw, something you’d buried deep. your body responded to him, the heat of his hands on your skin setting your nerves on fire, and you couldn’t help but kiss him deeper, harder.
his lips trailed down to your neck, biting, sucking, marking you, and with every gasp that escaped your mouth, he lost a little more control. "fuck," jungwon groaned, his breath hot against your skin as his hands slipped under your shirt, his touch rough, frantic. he was losing himself in you, piece by piece, every touch unraveling something inside him that had been locked away for too long.
and now, now that he had you, he wasn’t sure if he could ever let go. his fingers grazed your skin, and you arched into him, your body betraying you with a soft gasp that only spurred him on. his grip tightened, and the kiss deepened, his need pouring into you, relentless. he tugged at your shirt, your clothes, desperate to feel more of you, to claim more of you. he had waited so long for this moment—watched for so long. the fantasies, the dreams, the nights spent watching you from a distance, imagining this. nothing compared to the reality of having you beneath him, of hearing your moans, of feeling your body give in to his touch. his breath caught as he realized—you were giving in. you wanted him. your hands gripped at his shirt, pulling him closer, and it was like a switch flipped in him. his lips curled into a smirk against your skin as he kissed you harder, his movements growing more aggressive, more possessive.
oh. yes.
you gasped, breathless, as his lips pressed harder against yours, his hips grinding against you. this was what he had wanted all along, what he had craved. his cock was hard, straining against his clothes, and he groaned into your mouth, his fingers digging into your waist, his grip possessive, as if he was afraid you’d disappear. "fuck," he breathed, his voice low, dangerous, his lips brushing your ear. "you don’t know how long i’ve waited for this." his hips pressed into yours, grinding slowly, teasingly, his fingers slipping down to tug at your shorts. "hurry," you gasped, your breath shaky and uneven, the urgency in your voice sending a thrill through him. his body stilled for a moment, his eyes darkening, a twisted smirk playing on his lips as he kissed along your neck. "oh, that’s it," he muttered, his voice deep, rough. "so eager. so fucking eager." his teeth sank into your skin, harder this time, bruising. it wasn’t just a bite; it was a claim. his hands moved with purpose now, one pinning your wrists above your head, the other pulling at your clothes, his grip tight, possessive. you were his, and he was going to make sure you knew it. the darkness in him started to bleed through, inch by inch. his touches grew rougher, his kisses more frantic. he was unraveling before your eyes, losing control, losing himself in you.
his hips rocked harder against yours, the friction sending shockwaves through you, another moan tearing from your throat. but something was shifting in him—something darker, something that made you shudder beneath him. he was losing himself, bit by bit, and he wasn’t going to stop. "fuck," he growled, his breath hot against your neck, his voice filled with raw need. "you don’t know what you’ve done to me. i’ve been waiting... waiting so fucking long." his hips pressed harder into you, rougher, the tension between you unbearable now. his grip on your wrists tightened, pinning you harder against the bed, and you could feel it—the desperation, the obsession, the years of longing finally boiling over. "i’m not letting you go," jungwon muttered, his voice dark, a promise that made your stomach twist. his lips crashed against yours again, his kiss a mix of need and frustration, his control slipping further and further away.
"you think jay could ever make you feel like this?" jungwon hissed into your ear, his breath hot and jagged, the words slicing through the air like a challenge. his voice was low, darker than you had ever heard it, filled with a jealousy and possessiveness that sent a shiver down your spine. the roughness of his movements took you by surprise, the sudden intensity catching you off guard. a thrill shot through you at the way he was taking control, but the mention of jay—your boyfriend, miles away—sent a wave of guilt crashing through you. then you looked up at jungwon. really looked at him. his face was twisted, contorted in a way you’d never seen before. the softness you had always known was gone, replaced by something unrecognizable. his eyes burned with an intensity that bordered on madness, a wild, unhinged hunger that seemed to consume him. your heart pounded in your chest, a mix of fear and something far more dangerous tightening in your stomach. this wasn’t the boy you knew. this was something else, something darker, and yet the way he dominated you, the way he held you down, had you teetering on the edge of wanting more. "he couldn’t even eat you out after you gave him the suck of his life." jungwon’s voice was sharp, almost mocking, but laced with something more sinister, something dangerous.
your eyes flew open at his words, panic rising in your chest. how did he know? your voice trembled as you spoke, "what? how do you know that?" the room felt like it was closing in on you, the tension suffocating. no one should have known, no one could have seen or heard that moment. your breath hitched as fear crept up your spine. jungwon's smirk deepened, his eyes gleaming with something dark, something you couldn’t place. he leaned in closer, his body pressing harder against yours. "i know everything, y/n," he whispered, his voice low and chilling, his gaze locking onto yours with a twisted sense of satisfaction. it was like he was savoring your fear, relishing in the control he had over you. you tried to pull away, panic tightening in your chest, but jungwon’s grip only grew stronger. in one swift motion, he yanked your shorts down, making you yelp, the action so rough it left you breathless. "you didn’t think i’d just sit back and let him have you, did you?" his voice was taunting now, a cruel edge to his words. "i’ve been watching. every little thing."
the reality of his words slammed into you, and your heart raced with panic. watching? how? "w-what do you mean? how?" you stammered, your voice barely above a whisper as his weight pressed you deeper into the mattress, keeping you pinned beneath him. jungwon straddled you, his eyes dark and unreadable, but there was something more there now, something sinister lurking just beneath the surface. your heart pounded as his hands grabbed the hem of your shirt, tugging it up roughly to reveal your bra. before you could react, he snapped one of the straps against your skin, the sting sharp, causing you to gasp. your body reacted against your will, a flush of heat rising under your skin. "wouldn't you like to know?" jungwon's smirk grew, his eyes dancing with dark amusement, like this was all a game to him—a twisted, dangerous game that only he understood. fear and confusion clouded your thoughts, but there was something else there, something darker stirring inside you. despite the fear, the way he had complete control over you—his dominance, the weight of his body trapping you—had your pulse quickening in ways you didn’t expect. "jungwon, i’m not fucking around," you snapped, your voice shaky but firm, trying to mask the panic that was threatening to overtake you. your hands pushed against his chest, but he was unmovable, his body keeping you pinned beneath him, helpless.
"how were you watching?" you demanded, the question barely leaving your lips as your breath hitched. you needed to know, needed to understand what was happening. jungwon’s smirk didn’t waver. in fact, it seemed to grow darker. he leaned in, his lips brushing against your ear, his voice a low, taunting whisper. "i have my ways." the words sent a chill down your spine, his tone dripping with arrogance. his hips shifted, pressing harder against you, reminding you just how trapped you were. your breath caught as his fingers trailed down your stomach, the heat of his touch setting off a reaction in your body that you didn’t want to acknowledge. "you’re so curious," he teased, his voice growing darker, more dangerous. "but maybe you should focus on how you’re feeling right now." "you’re getting wetter, aren’t you?" he taunted, his voice low, dripping with satisfaction. your body betrayed you, reacting to his dominance, the way he controlled every moment, every touch. anger flared up, but it was mixed with something else—something you couldn’t shake, something primal and terrifying. and the worst part? he wasn’t wrong.
your body heated under his touch, despite the fear clawing at the edges of your mind. every part of you wanted to scream, wanted to fight back, but you were frozen, pinned beneath him, powerless. and jungwon? he saw it all. he saw your hesitation, your fear, the way your body responded to him. his smirk widened, his eyes gleaming with dark satisfaction as he watched you unravel beneath him. "he couldn’t give you this," he muttered, his lips grazing your neck, his teeth nipping at your skin, his breath hot and ragged. "he could never make you feel like this." his words were venomous, biting, but they sank into your skin, embedding themselves in your thoughts. you wanted to hate him, to push him away, but with every touch, every word, he was pulling you deeper into his world. "answer me," you spat, trying to steady your voice, but it wavered, betraying the whirlwind of confusion inside you. jungwon’s reaction wasn’t what you expected. instead of answering, he laughed, low and dark, his hands sliding back up to your bra, tugging at the fabric with a casual cruelty.
"oh, i’ve been watching you for a long time, y/n," he murmured, his eyes gleaming with something dangerous, something far beyond what you thought you knew of him. "all those times you thought you were alone… you weren’t." his words sent a chill crawling down your spine, your breath hitching in your throat. this wasn’t some sudden madness; this had been brewing inside him for longer than you realized. his fingers moved swiftly, unhooking your bra and tossing it aside like it meant nothing. his eyes darkened as he stared at your exposed chest, a satisfied moan slipping from his lips like he’d finally gotten what he’d been craving. without hesitation, his mouth latched onto one of your nipples, sucking hungrily, possessively. the heat of his mouth sent shockwaves through you, your body arching into him before your mind could catch up to what was happening. “knew these tits were perfect,” he mumbled between rough kisses and bites, his voice thick with arousal. his hands bunched your breasts together, squeezing as his tongue flicked between them. the intensity overwhelmed you, your skin heating under his touch, the sensation building into something you couldn’t control. before you could even catch your breath, his lips crashed back onto yours, demanding, relentless. his kiss was rough, desperate, like he couldn’t get enough of you, and despite the confusion clouding your thoughts, you found yourself kissing him back, matching his need with your own.
but even as your body responded to his touch, your mind was spinning—caught between the heat of the moment and the sickening realization that something was deeply, deeply wrong. jungwon pulled back just enough to smirk, his thumb brushing over your swollen bottom lip, teasing you. "you’re still trying to figure this out, aren’t you?" he whispered, his voice soft but full of twisted control. "tell me, won," you demanded, trying to push through the fog of your mind, daring him to either stop or take things further. your pulse quickened as you spoke, hating how your voice faltered. his eyes narrowed, something dark flickering in his expression, but there was a glint of excitement too, as if he enjoyed the fact that you were pushing back, not just giving in. it only fueled the twisted hunger burning inside him, made him want to tear you apart even more. your heart pounded harder as your body betrayed you, your pussy growing wetter with each passing second, reacting to the way he looked down at you—confident, knowing. like he had you right where he wanted, like he’d always known exactly how to break you down. "i know how you hated how bad jeongin was at eating you out," jungwon’s voice dripped with amusement, his eyes never leaving yours, "but you forgave him, didn’t you? because he was cute." your body froze, how did he know that? your heart raced, panic bubbling up inside you, but jungwon leaned in, his breath hot against your skin. "how?" you asked, your voice trembling with disbelief, your mind racing to piece together the puzzle. but jungwon didn’t stop. his fingers moved between your legs, slipping through your slick folds effortlessly, and a sharp hiss escaped his lips as he felt how wet you were for him.
"fuck," he groaned, pulling his fingers to his mouth, sucking them clean with a satisfaction that sent shivers through your entire body. his cock strained against his pants, the bulge pressing hard against you, reminding you what was coming next. "and kai," he continued, his voice dripping with that same twisted smirk, "you hated how he made you swallow his cum, didn’t you? because it tasted gross." he was revealing things no one should know, secrets you had buried deep. you squirmed beneath him, your mind reeling. how did he know these intimate details? things you never told anyone, not even your closest friends. his hand slid back between your legs, his fingers teasing your clit, rubbing slow circles as you struggled to stay in control. "but here you are," he murmured, his voice low, full of twisted satisfaction, "so fucking wet for me." "you pervert," you spat, but your voice lacked the bite you wanted it to have. your body was betraying you, responding to his touch even as your mind screamed that this was wrong. "were you listening in on me? when i was talking to yuna?" the memories of those conversations, those private confessions you had shared with your friend, rushed back to you. the thought of him listening in, lurking, sent a wave of nausea through you.
jungwon’s smirk grew darker, more twisted. "every word," he whispered, his fingers working your clit faster, his voice laced with a sick satisfaction. "while you thought you were alone, spilling your secrets to yuna, i was right there. hearing everything."
his free hand came down on your breasts, slapping them just enough to make them bounce, before gripping one firmly, his tongue licking his lips sinfully. he was savoring every reaction, every shudder of your body beneath him. "but i bet you're dying to know how." jungwon’s voice was low, teasing, as he toyed with you, his fingers slipping inside you again, deeper this time. your slick coated his knuckles as he pumped in and out, your body betraying you completely. "how?" you whispered, your breath shaky, barely able to form the words. the pressure between your legs was building, each stroke pushing you closer to the edge despite the horror of what he was saying. without warning, jungwon pulled away, leaving you gasping for breath, your body trembling with need. he stood up, quickly tugging his shirt off, revealing his toned chest. your eyes followed the movement.
you sat up slightly, your eyes locked on his body. "just tell me how?" you asked again, more urgently this time. "does it really matter?" he growled, his breath hot against your ear. his body pressed down on yours, heavy and dominant, as he rocked his hips against you, letting you feel the full hardness of his cock through his pants. "you’re here, pussy dripping," jungwon's voice was dripping with twisted satisfaction, his eyes gleaming with something darker, more manic, as he watched you squirm beneath him. "about to fuck your stepbrother." his words hung in the air like a confession, dark and sinister, and you realized—he had been watching you, listening, lurking in the shadows for far longer than you ever could have imagined. jungwon moved, pushing off the bed to stand for a brief second before he settled back down, lying flat against the mattress. his eyes, dark and unrelenting, never left yours, watching every breath, every flicker of hesitation that crossed your face. the weight of his gaze felt like a physical force, pinning you in place.
"come here," he whispered, his voice low and dangerous, his lips curling into a smirk that sent a shiver down your spine. his head rested against the pillow, one hand lazily trailing down his chest, teasing himself, as if he had all the time in the world. "sit on my face, y/n. maybe then i’ll tell you everything." "you’re fucking insane," you spat, your voice trembling slightly as you tried to keep some semblance of control. but even as the words left your mouth, you could feel the heat between your legs, the undeniable ache that had been building ever since his hands had been on you. jungwon didn’t flinch. if anything, his smirk deepened, that dark amusement dancing in his eyes. "maybe," he admitted, his tone almost casual, like he was discussing the weather. "but i’m a man of my word. i’m not going to let you get all wet like this and not take responsibility for it."
his voice dropped lower, more commanding, as his hand slid lower, trailing down to his pants, his fingers teasing the waistband. "or would you rather stop this now?" he challenged, his eyes locked on yours, daring you to make the choice. "because i’ll stop if you want me to." you sat frozen, your mind screaming at you to walk away, to leave before it was too late, but your body… your body wanted something else. your pulse quickened, heat pooling low in your stomach as jungwon’s eyes stayed fixed on yours, waiting, anticipating. "come on, y/n," jungwon whispered, his voice taking on that seductive edge, his body shifting, as if inviting you in. "you know you don’t want this to stop." he licked his lips, his tongue flicking out slowly, teasingly. "you want it. just admit it." "you’re such a fucking asshole," you muttered, your voice low, barely above a whisper, but your legs were already moving, your body acting before your mind could catch up.
jungwon’s smirk widened, his eyes gleaming with triumph as he watched you, his hands sliding up to rest on your thighs as you straddled him, your body trembling with anticipation. "yeah?" he murmured, his voice rough and thick with desire. "but i’m your fucking asshole, aren’t i?" the second you settled over him, hovering just above his face, jungwon’s hands tightened on your thighs, pulling you down slowly, his breath hot against your core. "that’s it," he whispered, his voice low and dark, sending a thrill through you. "you’re gonna ride my face, and i’ll tell you everything you want to know." you hesitated for just a second, the last flicker of doubt crossing your mind, but then his tongue flicked out, teasing the edge of your folds, and the hesitation melted away in an instant. your head fell back, a soft gasp escaping your lips as the heat of his mouth sent a jolt of pleasure through your body. "fuck," you whispered, your fingers curling into his soft hair as jungwon’s tongue slid between your folds, teasing and tasting you. flicking your clit, tracing circles on it. his grip on your thighs tightened, holding you firmly in place as he licked deeper, groaning softly against your skin. your body trembled, every nerve on fire as jungwon worked you with expert precision, his tongue moving in slow, then picking up. the intensity of it all—the heat, the sensation, the control—was overwhelming, consuming you completely. and just when you thought you couldn’t take any more, jungwon pulled back slightly, his breath hot against your core as he whispered, "you taste fucking perfect."
your breath hitched, your heart racing in your chest as his words sank in, sending a fresh wave of heat crashing through you. his tongue returned with renewed intensity, his hands gripping your thighs tighter, pulling you down harder against his face, making it impossible to think, impossible to breathe. he was relentless, and you were lost. "tell me," you gasped, your voice shaky, barely holding together as his tongue worked you over and over again. "tell me everything." jungwon groaned against you, the vibration sending shockwaves through your body as he looked up at you, his eyes dark, filled with something dangerous, something wild. "after i make you cum, baby," he whispered, his voice low and rough, his fingers digging into your skin as he pulled you even closer. "then i'll tell you everything." and you knew, as the pleasure built higher and higher, that you were too far gone to stop now. "shit," jungwon moaned against your pussy, his voice thick with desperation, his eyes rolling back as if he were lost in the taste of you. the sound of him, so consumed by you, had you throwing your head back, overwhelmed by the intensity of it all.
"finally," he groaned, barely pulling away to speak, his lips brushing against your swollen folds, "you let me eat your pussy." his words were raw, dripping with satisfaction, but there was an edge to them, something darker, something possessive. his gaze flickered up to meet yours for a split second, a twisted smirk pulling at his lips. "but jay never got a chance to try, did he?" he added, his tone mocking, taunting. it was like he was relishing in the thought of jay being left out, being second to him. the mention of jay made your stomach twist with guilt, but before you could respond, jungwon's mouth moved lower, his tongue tracing a slick path that had you gasping.
you jerked as his tongue flicked over your puckered hole, the sensation sudden, intense, making your entire body tense on top of him. jungwon's moans vibrated against your skin, deep and primal, as he prodded his tongue against your tight hole. it was overwhelming—everything about him, the way he touched you, the way he tasted you, his hunger for you. "you’ve never let anyone fuck your ass, have you?" his voice was a low growl, filled with smug satisfaction as he pulled back just enough to look up at you. his eyes gleamed with dark desire, and the way he said it—it was like a promise, a claim. he had already decided what he wanted, and he wasn’t asking for permission. "but you’re gonna let me, aren’t you?" his voice was manic, dripping with that same twisted hunger, unable to move, unable to think. his hand gripped your hip tightly as his tongue slid back over your hole, teasing you again, the sensation sending shockwaves through your body. you couldn’t stop trembling, the mix of shock and heat building inside you, spiraling out of control. "i bet teddy didn’t feel half of what i’m feeling right now. the way you’re grinding on me, using me, just like you used to use him—except i can make you come for real." what? jungwon's voice was dark, teasing, but you could barely process his words, too busy trembling from the way his tongue continued to lick and lap at your soaked pussy.
"i’m gonna take every fucking part of you," he growled, his tongue swirling around your asshole before sliding back up to your pussy. "fuck every single one of your holes and fill it with my cum," he continued, his words thick with lust, his voice dark and commanding. "you’d like that, wouldn’t you?" a moan ripped from your throat, raw and uncontrollable, and before you could even process it, his palm came down hard against your ass, the sting sharp and immediate. the force of it made your muscles clench, and your whole body jerked forward. you could feel his grip tighten on your ass, spreading you even more as he leaned in again, licking a slow, deliberate path from your asshole to your pussy, leaving you gasping for air. "fuck, jungwon—" you struggled, trying to move, to regain some kind of control, but he was too strong. he pulled away from your pussy suddenly, replacing his tongue with the brutal force of his fingers, thrusting into you hard and fast.
the obscene sound of your wetness filled the room, mixing with your ragged breaths and the slap of his hand on your thigh. your legs shook, barely able to keep up with the intensity building inside you. "i know you can fucking squirt," jungwon hissed through clenched teeth, his eyes wild with lust. his jaw was slack, and his expression was hungry, like he was devouring every reaction you gave him. "come on," he growled, his fingers pumping deeper, harder. "fucking squirt all over me." your body couldn’t hold back any longer. you exploded, squirting in violent, uncontrollable bursts, your juices splashing against his chest, down his neck, his face. jungwon didn’t flinch—if anything, he groaned, deep and guttural, as he licked up every drop, his tongue greedy, relentless. "f-fuck, stop," you whimpered, your body trembling uncontrollably as waves of overstimulation crashed over you. your vision blurred, your muscles weak as you tried to crawl away, desperate for a break, for some relief. but jungwon wasn’t about to let you go. his hand shot out, gripping your ankle, yanking you back. "where do you think you're going?" he growled, a crazed look in his eyes as he towered over you. his hand moved to his pants, pulling his cock free, and the sight of it—hard, thick, dripping—sent another wave of heat coursing through your body. he stroked himself slowly, pre-cum leaking from the tip, his eyes locked on yours with an intensity that sent shivers through your entire body. his grip tightened on your hair, keeping you in place, the raw obsession in his gaze making your breath hitch.
"look at me," jungwon demanded, his hand forced your head up, and your eyes immediately fell on the sight of him stroking his cock, thick and hard right in front of your face. "you see this?" he hissed, his breath shaky, almost unhinged. "you fucking did this to me." "you’re going to take every fucking inch of me," he growled, his eyes burning with hunger as he leaned closer, his cock brushing your lips, daring you. "you hear that?" your lips parted unconsciously, your tongue flicking out to wet them, and jungwon noticed immediately, a wicked smirk twisting at the corners of his mouth. "that’s it…" he groaned, his voice filled with dark satisfaction. "you want it, don’t you?" you didn’t answer. you couldn’t. your mind was swirling, caught between the reality of how far things had gone and the way your body responded to his touch, to his words. "open up," he commanded, his voice steady, his gaze never wavering. "i want to feel that pretty little mouth wrapped around me while you fucking choke on it."
the words sent a shiver down your spine. he was watching you closely, waiting, his fingers still tight in your hair as he pressed his cock to your lips again, pushing against them, demanding more. he didn’t wait for you to respond, his hand pushing your head down as he slid his cock into your mouth without hesitation. you barely had time to process the size of him, thick and overwhelming, as he filled your mouth completely. your hands shot up, instinctively gripping his thighs, but jungwon didn’t slow down. he was relentless, thrusting into your mouth harder, faster, giving you no time to adjust. you gagged, struggling to take him, your eyes watering as he pushed deeper, but jungwon’s grip only tightened, holding you in place as he groaned low in his throat, lost in the sensation. "that’s it, fucking choke on it," he snarled, his voice dripping with filthy satisfaction. "you wanted this, didn’t you?" you couldn’t answer, couldn’t even breathe as his cock hit the back of your throat, choking you. your hands pressed against his thighs, trying to push him back, but he didn’t relent. his hips bucked against your mouth, forcing you to take more of him, his voice harsh, possessive. "you’re gonna take all of me," he growled, his eyes wild as he watched you struggle beneath him, his fingers digging into your scalp. "you think i’m gonna stop now? after all this? after everything you’ve done to me?" his voice cracked with intensity, his obsession bubbling over, too much to contain.
your tears mixed with spit, dripping down your chin as he fucked your mouth with ruthless abandon, his groans filling the air, echoing off the walls. "you look like such a fucking mess," he taunted, his voice thick with lust, but there was something more underneath, something twisted and broken. "drooling all over my cock like the slut you are." his words hit you like a blow, raw and degrading, but there was no denying the way your body reacted, the way your core tightened with every filthy insult, with every thrust that left you gasping for air. "you can’t even take half of me," he groaned, his cock stretching your mouth painfully, but there was no room to stop, no room to even breathe. "but you’ll fucking learn. you’ll learn how to take every inch of me." his thrusts became more erratic, more desperate, and the sounds of your gagging only seemed to fuel him further. "i’m gonna make you my fucking whore," jungwon growled, his words filled with possessiveness, his hand gripping your hair tighter, forcing you to take him deeper until you thought you might pass out from lack of air. and then, just when you thought he couldn’t push further, he pulled out suddenly, leaving you gasping for breath, your throat burning, your body trembling. your lips were swollen, wet, as you tried to steady yourself, but jungwon didn’t give you a chance to recover. he leaned down down to cage you between his arms, his bare chest pressed against yours, the heat of his body overwhelming, suffocating. his breath ghosted over your ear, “you’re mine,” he growled, his fingers digging into your hips, pinning you beneath him. “and you fucking know it. tell me how much you want it.”
your mind was spinning, your body reacting instinctively, “i want it, jungwon. i want you.” a smirk curled on his lips, his dark eyes gleaming with a twisted satisfaction, he completely had you. “fucking filthy for me,” he murmured, voice low and tainted with pride. “and i haven’t even started yet.” “you think jay or any of those other idiots came even close?" his lips brushed your ear, and he spoke again, darker this time. "i’m gonna fuck you so good, you’ll forget every single one of them. my cock’s the only one you’ll ever need." and then, he pushed inside, the stretch brutal, tearing a gasp from your throat. the sensation was overwhelming, too much, but it was exactly what you craved. your body arched beneath him, caught between the overwhelming pleasure and the creeping horror as his words sunk in. he had been watching. always watching.
"i’ve seen it all, and it's so much better than just sitting in front of my screen every night, getting myself off," jungwon muttered, his voice low, dripping with satisfaction. "every fucking time you let them touch you. every single moment you thought you were alone—i was watching." screen? your breath hitched, panic rising in your chest as the pieces began to fall into place. “you... what the fuck—how?” you gasped, horror flooding through you as the reality of what he said hit. “you were watching me?” jungwon’s pace never faltered, each thrust brutal and relentless. he locked eyes with you, dark and unapologetic. “yeah,” he sneered. “you didn’t think i’d let those assholes have you without making sure they weren’t fucking you up, did you? i had to make sure they didn’t hurt you. had to make sure you stayed mine.” "you had a fucking camera?" your voice cracked, the disbelief seeping into every word as the air between you turned suffocating.
he grinned darkly, eyes glinting with a manic edge. “yeah, i had a camera. more than one.” your heart pounded against your chest, anger and fear warring inside you. you tried to push him off, but your body, treacherous and betraying, moved with his rhythm. "jungwon, that’s... sick," you hissed, your voice trembling, but it didn’t stop your body from arching into him, from clenching around him as his thrusts became even more punishing. his hand shot up, gripping your jaw, forcing you to look into his eyes. "shut up," he growled, his face inches from yours, "you don’t get it, do you? i didn’t fucking care about them. i did this for you. no one else could touch you like this. no one else deserves you." your hands pressed against his chest, trying to fight back, but every thrust had you gasping for air, your thoughts blurring in the haze of pleasure and disgust. “you’re fucking sick, jungwon,” you managed to choke out.
he leaned in closer, his lips ghosting over your ear, a dark chuckle slipping from his lips. “yeah? i’m sick?” he sneered, his voice dripping with arrogance. “then why are you so fucking wet for me? you didn’t stop fucking against me, even after everything.” his words were twisted, taunting, but you couldn’t deny it. the shame twisted inside you, mixing with the pleasure coursing through your veins. "fuck off," you spat, but your voice lacked conviction, your body betraying the truth of what you were feeling. jungwon grinned, pulling back slightly to look down at you, his eyes gleaming with that same dark satisfaction. “you think i don’t know what you do when you’re alone?” he whispered, his voice low and mocking. “you think i didn’t see the way you fucked that teddy bear i got you, grinding against it like a desperate little slut, rubbing yourself raw until you came?” your stomach dropped, humiliation crashing over you in waves as the truth sank in. so that's what he meant earlier, the words flying by because you were too lost in pleasure, fuck, he'd really seen everything. you recall his words. "i bet teddy didn’t feel half of what i’m feeling right now. the way you’re grinding on me, using me, just like you used to use him—except i can make you come for real." "you... you’re disgusting," you stammered, the shame burning through your skin, but jungwon wasn’t fazed. he continued to fuck you, his hand reaching down to rub circles against your clit. but you slap his hand away, and he just smirks.
“yeah, maybe i am,” he groaned, his voice dripping with satisfaction as he pounded into you harder, drowning in the feeling of your tight, trembling walls wrapped around him. “but you’re mine. and you fucking love it.” his hand slid down to your throat, his fingers tightening just enough to make your breath hitch, his smirk widening as he saw the effect it had on you. “you’re never going to need anyone else. just me. say it.” you could barely breathe, let alone think, but even now, through the haze of pleasure and disgust, you couldn’t help but fight back. “i… i hate you—" “wrong fucking answer,” he snarled, his grip on your throat tightening as his hips snapped forward brutally, each thrust shaking you, pushing you deeper into the bed. the sheets tangled beneath you as you gasped for air, every brutal stroke tearing another cry from your lips. “try again. you fucking love this.” despite the storm of emotions flooding your mind—disgust, anger, shame—there was no denying it. the way his cock dragged against your walls, the way your body reacted to his dominance, had you screaming his name, it was sick and twisted, but it was true.
"didn’t you say you love me?" jungwon taunted, full of arrogance as he tightened his grip around your throat. the force of his thrusts had you bouncing against the mattress. “wasn’t that what you said?” you couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think, your body shaking as he pounded into you without mercy. all you could do was grip his arms tighter, pulling him closer, needing more despite the war raging inside you. "answer me," he growled, slamming into you harder, his hips grinding against you as his cock dragged in and out, each thrust more obscene than the last. "didn’t you say you fucking love me?" you tried to speak, but the pressure on your throat made it impossible to get the words out. your breath hitched, your vision blurring as his hand squeezed tighter. finally, you managed to whisper, your voice shaky and broken. “you’re my brother... of course, i—I do—” jungwon’s eyes lit up with a twisted, possessive fire. his grip tightened even more as he watched you, you were breaking, and he loved it. "you're mine," he growled, the intensity in his voice sending another wave of heat through you. "say it." "i’m yours," you gasped, the words spilling out of you, tears streaming down your cheeks as the weight of everything crashed into you. it was true. you were his, and no matter how hard you fought it, there was no escaping it, not anymore when he was balls deep in you giving you pleasure you'd only dreamed of.
that wicked, satisfied grin spreading across his face as he leaned in, his teeth sinking into your bottom lip hard enough to make you wince. the pain mixed with pleasure, sending a shiver down your spine, your moans turning into broken sobs as he fucked you deeper into the mattress. “fuck—” you gasped, barely able to get the word out before he was thrusting into you again, harder, faster, his hips grinding against yours as if he was trying to bury himself deeper, trying to own every inch of you. and maybe he already had. no, he did. he completely owned you. “shit,” jungwon growled, his breath hot and ragged as he pounded into you, the sound of his hips slamming against yours filling the room. your entire body convulsed, the stretch of him deep inside you was overwhelming, but your body refused to let him go. your walls clenched around him, desperate to keep him there, desperate to feel more of him. “fuck,” you sobbed, nails digging into his back, trying to hold on, but it was no use. he had you completely, and he knew it. "jungwon, i can’t— you’re gonna break me—"
"yes, you can," he snarled, his lips hovering just over yours, his voice dripping with possession. he thrust harder, deeper, making you scream as he pushed past every limit. “you fucking can. i’m not stopping until you’re ruined for anyone else." the sheer force of his words, the raw need in his voice, sent a jolt of heat through you, making your head spin. your moans turned into broken sobs, your body shaking uncontrollably beneath him as he drove into you mercilessly, taking you apart piece by piece. you were addicted to him. you came again, violently, your entire body trembling as your release gushed over his cock. your orgasm hit you like a wave, crashing down and leaving you gasping for breath, your mind going blank as everything else faded away. jungwon let out a deep, desperate groan, his body shuddering as he felt you clench around him. “fuck,” he hissed through clenched teeth, his voice thick with crazed lust as he gripped your hips even tighter, bruising your skin. "your fucking pussy—god, it’s perfect. you’re fucking perfect." "you know, i fucking hated jay for touching you," jungwon growled, his pace becoming even more brutal not stopping even if your pussy was already dripping all over the sheets. "letting him fuck you like that. making him cum inside you? is that what you wanted, huh?" his fingers thread through your hair, keeping you pinned down as he licked long stripes up your neck again, obsessed with the way your sweat tasted. “you wanna be a fucking cum dumpster? that what you like? letting them fill you up just so i could fucking watch?"
you whimpered, shaking your head, but your body was betraying you, reacting to his words, to the way he was fucking you. "don’t fucking lie," he spat, his eyes burning with obsession as he pulled back to look at you. "you liked putting on a show for me, didn’t you? i almost think you were doing it on purpose.” “jungwon, no, I—” you tried to protest, your voice trembling, but the pleasure was too intense, every thrust from him stealing the words from your mouth. “letting me watch you get ruined, just so i could want you more,” he sneered. “you’re fucking mine now,” he growled, his voice low and dark, each word dripping with madness. “and i’m gonna make sure jay fucking sees it.” your heart dropped, panic surging through you. “no, jungwon—he can’t,” you gasped, your body trembling as the realization of what he was saying crashed over you. the thought of jay finding out, of seeing you like this, was too much. “he can’t know—" jungwon’s chuckled, "oh, so you want to keep this secret? keep fucking your stepbrother behind his back?" he taunted, his voice cruel, mocking, as he drove himself deeper into you. you choked on a sob, trying to push him away, "jungwon, please—" you begged, your voice breaking, but he wasn’t listening. “what’s the matter?” he taunts, his breath hot against your skin. “scared of what jay would think? scared of what he’d do if he knew you were getting fucked by your stepbrother?”
his grip on your jaw tightened, forcing you to look at him, his eyes wild with obsession. “you don’t get to hide from this,” he growled, his voice low and possessive. “you’re mine, and i want everyone to fucking know it.”
you could barely speak, your voice cracking as you pleaded with him. “please, jungwon—he can’t find out—” for a moment, he seemed to hesitate, his pace slowing just enough to let you catch your breath, the pressure easing. but then, without warning, he flipped you over, pushing you onto your hands and knees. your arms shook as you tried to hold yourself up, but your body was trembling, weak from everything he’d already done to you. before you could brace yourself, his hand came down hard on your ass, the sharp sting making you yelp, your body jerking forward. the sheets twisted beneath you as you struggled to hold yourself up, but jungwon wasn’t giving you any time to recover. “you’re gonna fucking take it,” he growled, his voice thick with lust as he lined himself up behind you before roughly facing you to face the foot of your bed. “and you’re gonna scream my name so loud, jay will fucking hear it.” "keep it together," jungwon growled, his hand coming down on your ass again, the sharp slap forcing a yelp from your throat. this time, the sting was harsher, your body jolting under the weight of his dominance. "i'm not fucking done with you." you whimpered, your arms weak, trembling as you tried to push yourself up, but it was useless. your limbs felt like jelly, barely able to hold you together as he lined himself up behind you again. your heart pounded, fear and anticipation swirling in your gut as he slammed into you without warning, driving deep, the angle sending a shock through your entire body. "fuck," you gasped, your back arching involuntarily as he filled you, the stretch almost unbearable. your hands scrambled to grab the sheets, but every thrust made you lose control, your body collapsing beneath him as he continued, merciless. "arch your back," he snarled, gripping your hips and yanking you into position. even as you shook your head, gasping for air, his hold was unyielding, bending you exactly how he wanted. “i can’t—” you choked out, tears streaming down your face as the pleasure and pain intertwined, his cock hitting places that had you seeing stars. "it's too much—"
"yes, you fucking can," he hissed, his fingers digging into your skin, leaving marks. "i’m not stopping until you can’t take anyone else. until i ruin you for anyone." every word hit like a blow, sending you spiraling, your body teetering on the edge as he pounded into you harder, deeper. you sobbed, your mind a haze of pleasure and panic. your body was betraying you, responding to him, clenching around him like it needed this, needed him, despite the fear gnawing at your insides. and then he leaned forward, his chest pressing against your back, his breath hot against your neck as he yanked your head back into a kiss. the kiss was desperate, messy, full of raw hunger. his tongue flicked against yours, and you couldn’t even respond, couldn’t do anything but whimper as his weight crushed you, trapping you beneath him. the position made it harder to breathe, your neck straining, and the angle made every thrust hit deeper, driving you closer to the edge, closer to losing yourself completely. your eyes fluttered shut, your mind trying to escape, but then jungwon’s voice snapped you back. “look.”
you couldn’t. you were too lost, too overwhelmed, your moans spilling out uncontrollably as he kept slamming into you. but he wasn’t giving you a choice. his hand gripped your jaw, forcing your head up, and he growled, "open your eyes." you blinked through the haze, confused and trembling. and then you saw it—your teddy bear, sitting on the dresser, its black, unfeeling eyes staring back at you. at first, it didn’t register. what the fuck was he doing? jungwon chuckled darkly behind you, his breath hot against your neck. "say hi," he whispered, amusement dripping from his voice, sending a chill down your spine. "say hi?" you repeated, confusion cutting through the fog of pleasure. your voice was broken, barely audible. "i don't—" “smile for the camera,” he taunted, his tone turning cruel, dark amusement coloring every word. “come on, he's watching.” your stomach dropped, horror twisting inside you like a knife. jay was watching this?
you moaned, but not from pleasure—this time, it was from sheer humiliation. the sound ripped from your throat as your eyes locked onto the faint red blinking light in the teddy bear's eyes. panic surged through you, icy and cold, the realization hitting you like a truck. jay was watching. live. the toy that had been a source of comfort for you, the one you used to hold onto during sleepless nights, had been turned into something twisted, something ugly. you became hysterical, your body trembling uncontrollably beneath jungwon’s relentless thrusts. "no, no, no," you sobbed, your voice breaking as the tears streamed down your face. but there was no escape. your mind was spiraling, torn between disgust, shame, and the unbearable sensation of jungwon still fucking you, not letting up. "what's wrong?" jungwon’s voice was low, mocking, dripping with sick amusement as he slowed his thrusts just enough to make you feel every inch of him. "you don’t wanna tell jay how good i'm fucking you?" your body betrayed you, clenching around him, even as the tears kept falling, even as the humiliation consumed you. you couldn’t stop it. you couldn’t fight back. jungwon’s hand clamped over your mouth, muffling your sobs as he pounded into you harder, more ruthless, more relentless. the weight of everything crashed down on you—jay was watching, seeing you like this. you wouldn’t be able to face him ever again. the shame burned deep inside you, twisting, making you feel even more exposed, even more ruined.
“open your eyes,” jungwon demanded, his voice rough, filled with dominance, and your eyes snapped open out of reflex. you couldn’t help it. your gaze flickered back to the teddy bear, the red light still blinking, and the full realization of what was happening hit you like a tidal wave. jay was watching you get fucked, wrecked by your stepbrother. and just as jungwon thrust deeper, you felt it—your body giving in, pleasure and pain mixing until you couldn’t tell the difference. your muffled screams were drowned out by the sound of skin slapping against skin, your body trembling as you clung to the sheets, unable to stop yourself from falling apart. you hated how much your body responded to him, hated how much you needed it, how much you needed him, even as your mind screamed at you to stop. but it was too late. you were already his, and jay was watching. and jungwon wasn’t going to stop until you both knew it. your body betrayed you, clenching tighter around him even as more tears spilled down your cheeks, sobs wracking your chest. you couldn’t process it—the mix of shame, horror, and pleasure tangling into something you couldn’t escape. jay was watching you. seeing you like this. jungwon wasn’t stopping. his hand clamped down over your mouth, muffling your cries as he kept pounding into you, relentless. mind drowning in the flood of emotions crashing over you—humiliation, lust, guilt. how could jay be seeing this? wasn’t he supposed to be away? "you’re lying!" you tried to scream, but jungwon’s hand silenced you, your body jerking with each thrust. the teddy bear, the once comforting presence, was now an unfeeling witness to your destruction, its cold eyes staring blankly as jungwon wrecked you.
you squeezed your eyes shut, desperate to escape it all, but it only made the emotions stronger. if jay was really watching this, if he saw you like this, you’d never be able to face him again. the thought burned inside you, making you feel even more exposed, more ruined. "open your fucking eyes," jungwon demanded, his voice dark with control, and your eyes snapped open on instinct. there it was again—the teddy bear. that damned blinking light, red and cruel, blinking like it was mocking you. and just as jungwon drove deeper, your eyes rolled back, moans slipping from your lips, your body betraying every bit of shame and fear as he kept you pinned, fucking you harder than before. "i even got him a present," jungwon grunted, his voice tight, on the edge, his pace turning erratic, desperate. "but i don’t think he’ll want them anymore." your mind shattered under the way he was fucking you. humiliation melted into something raw, something addictive. fuck—this was too good. jungwon fucking you like this was too fucking good. the way he wanted you, the way he claimed you—you were gone. completely. your body shook violently beneath him, each thrust pushing you deeper into a haze of pure need. you couldn’t think straight, couldn’t hold onto anything except the brutal pace of him inside you, each thrust wrecking you in ways you never thought possible. words slipped from your mouth before you could stop them.
"jay… i'm sorry," you gasped, voice ragged and desperate, barely able to breathe between each word.
jungwon's grip on your throat tightened, his lips curling into a wicked smirk. "sorry? don't fucking apologize," he growled, pulling your face closer to his. "tell him the truth. tell him how good i’m fucking you." “i can’t—” you whimpered, voice barely above a whisper, your body betraying you as you moaned against his hand, your legs quaking as another wave of pleasure hit you. “yes, you can,” jungwon hissed in your ear, his voice low and dangerous, filled with twisted satisfaction. "tell him how good i’m fucking you. tell him who really owns you now." jungwon’s grip tightened, forcing your eyes back to the teddy bear, the blinking red light that reminded you of the truth. "he’s watching, baby," jungwon whispered, his lips brushing against your ear as his hips snapped against yours. "watching you fall apart for me. watching me wreck your pretty little pussy. doesn’t it feel good? doesn’t it feel right?"
every thrust, every degrading word spilling from jungwon’s lips—he was right. you fucking loved it. "tell him," jungwon coaxed, his voice soft now, almost soothing as his hand slid down your body, his fingers circling your clit. "tell him how much you love it." "jay," you sobbed, your voice ragged, trembling. "i… i—fuck, i love it." the words slipped out before you could stop them, your body arching beneath jungwon, completely surrendering. jungwon’s grin widened, his satisfaction palpable as he fucked you harder, his fingers working faster on your clit, driving you to the brink. "good girl," he whispered, his voice dripping with approval. "now tell him you're mine. tell him who really owns you." "i’m yours," you choked out, your voice breaking as the words left your lips. "i’m yours, jungwon." his thrusts grew erratic, desperate, and you felt him twitch inside you, his breathing ragged as he chased his release. "that’s right," he growled, his voice thick with possessiveness. "you're mine. and now jay knows it too." he had you folded, knees pressed tight against your chest, your back arching painfully as jungwon forced your head up, making you watch, making you feel every single second of it.
there was no escaping it now. not the humiliation. not the pleasure. everything was crashing over you, overwhelming, and there was no way out. you were a wreck—drool slipping from your parted lips, your tongue poking out as moans poured from your mouth, completely uncontrollable. “fuck, fuck, fuck!” you screamed, the sound raw, desperate, like you were on the verge of breaking apart entirely. “yessss,” you dragged out, your jaw slack, body trembling, utterly destroyed beneath him. jungwon wasn’t any better, his face buried in your neck, his breath erratic and hot against your skin as he lost himself inside of you. his moans grew louder, sloppier, his entire body shaking with the effort of holding on just a little longer. he was completely gone, fucking feral, groaning into your skin as he slammed into you, harder, deeper, like he needed to ruin you—like nothing else mattered except the sound of your body breaking under him. "i’m gonna come inside you,” he groaned, his voice hoarse, broken, like he was barely holding on. “fill you up so good, no one else will ever fucking compare. you’re mine." "please," you whimpered, your voice trembling, on the edge, barely able to form words. "fuck, come inside me. ruin me, i need it—i need you to." your begging shattered him, ripped away whatever restraint he had left. with one final brutal thrust, jungwon buried himself deep inside you, his whole body seizing, shuddering violently as he came.
you felt it—hot, thick, pouring into you, the heat filling every inch of your body as he groaned your name, his face twisted in pure, animalistic pleasure.
your last orgasm slammed into you—overwhelming, all-consuming. your vision blurred, your mouth open in a scream you barely recognized as your own, your mind blank as pleasure ravaged you, wave after violent wave. "fuck!" you cried out, voice raw, completely wrecked, as your body convulsed under him. your legs trembled, your breath coming in broken gasps as jungwon stayed pressed against you, his body just as wrecked as yours, both of you caught in the intensity of it all. he collapsed on top of you, breath hot, panting harshly in your ear, but neither of you moved. neither of you could. you were both completely spent, bodies locked together, tangled in the aftermath of what just happened. but even as the pleasure faded, your body still craved him. even as reality crashed back, the weight of what you’d done hung heavy. you gave in to him. completely. utterly. your fucking stepbrother. when he finally pulled out, you felt it—his cum leaking out of you, dripping down your thighs, pooling on the ruined sheets beneath you. but jungwon wasn’t done. not yet. his grip didn’t loosen. instead, he grabbed your jaw, forcing your face up, turning you toward the camera. his lips brushed against your cheek, pressing a mocking kiss there, eyes never leaving the lens. you were fucked out, barely conscious, eyes glazed and half-lidded, a ruined mess under him. and that’s exactly what jungwon wanted.
he wanted jay to see everything. but jungwon wasn’t done. he grabbed your wrist, lifting it with ease, forcing your limp hand into a wave. the gesture was slow, deliberate, mocking as he waved it toward the blinking red light in the teddy bear’s eyes. jungwon chuckled softly, watching as your eyes fluttered closed, your head lolling to the side. you were passed out, completely ruined, your body limp beneath him, and yet, even in your unconscious state, he still had control. “that’s right,” he whispered, his voice barely audible, dark satisfaction rolling off him in waves as he gently lowered your hand, brushing a thumb over your wrist like it was some twisted act of affection. “no coming back now.” he leaned back, his eyes locked on your ruined form, and for a moment, the room was filled with nothing but the sound of his ragged breath. everything had fallen apart, and yet for jungwon, this was everything. this was what he wanted. to have you like this—to show jay, to show you both, that there was no escaping him. he smirked, glancing back at the camera, his eyes glinting with that same sick satisfaction. “hope you enjoyed the show,” he muttered under his breath, mocking, taunting, before finally pulling away from your limp body. because there was no coming back from this. not for you. not for jay.
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jay entered the house quietly, a smile tugging at his lips. everything jungwon had told him was perfectly set in place—you supposedly asleep, the surprise he’d planned all ready to go. they’d planned this days ago, jungwon kept complaining about how sad you were, how much you missed jay. so jay had left early, closing out everything he needed to just to make you happy. jungwon had assured him he’d be out with jake and sunghoon to give you both privacy, and he’d even asked jay to shut down his computer. jungwon didn’t want you pestering him about the bill, and jay, being the kind of guy he was, had agreed. he trusted jungwon. loved him like a brother. but as jay moved through the house, he noticed something—the faint sound of movement coming from your room. he paused, heart racing a little faster, not wanting to be caught just yet. he wanted the surprise to be perfect. he slipped into jungwon’s room quietly, careful not to make any noise. the desk sat in front of him, the soft glow of the screen catching his eye. then he saw it.
jay’s heart dropped, his smile fading, replaced by a wave of confusion, then horror. on the screen was a live feed of your room—jungwon fucking you relentlessly, his hand clamped over your mouth, muffling your sobs. your face was streaked with tears, your body shaking from the intensity of his thrusts. jay froze. the bouquet of flowers he had been holding slipped from his grasp, hitting the floor softly, forgotten. his mind was a whirlwind of emotions—anger, betrayal, disgust—all fighting for control. he wanted to move, wanted to storm into that room and tear jungwon off you. but he didn’t. he couldn’t. his feet were glued to the floor as he stared at the screen, his heart shattering with each passing second. “open your fucking eyes,” jungwon’s voice snarled through the speakers, low and demanding. jay watched as your eyes snapped open, locking onto something out of frame. the pain in your eyes was clear at first, but then, as jungwon slammed into you harder, deeper, something shifted. your eyes rolled back, your body arching beneath him, moans spilling from your lips. you fucking loved it.
jay’s stomach churned. bile rose in his throat as the realization hit him like a sledgehammer. this wasn’t just some accident. this wasn’t some mistake. you wanted this. you wanted him. jungwon. your fucking stepbrother. the betrayal was suffocating. you—his girlfriend, the person he thought he knew inside and out—were being wrecked by someone he considered family. jungwon, the brother he trusted, was fucking you, and you were falling apart beneath him. how long had this been going on? how many times had you let him touch you like this? fuck you like this? jay’s eyes flickered to the keyboard. there they were—your panties. his favorite. stained with jungwon’s dried cum. disgust surged through him. his fists clenched at his sides, rage burning beneath his skin. but he couldn’t stop watching. he couldn’t fucking stop. "i even got him a present," jungwon grunted, his voice strained, breathless. "but i doubt he’ll want them anymore." jay’s heart twisted painfully as he realized the truth—this was all planned. jungwon had set him up. this entire thing was a fucking setup, a game. jay’s vision blurred, his pulse pounding in his ears. jungwon’s hips slammed into you, harder and harder, your body writhing beneath him, begging for more.
you were so lost in the pleasure, moaning and gasping, completely ruined—and jay could only stand there, watching, as his entire world crumbled. how could you do this? you were sobbing now, crying out jungwon’s name as you begged for him to finish inside you. the sound of your voice, raw and desperate, shattered what was left of jay’s heart. he felt sick. had this been a game to you? had any of it been real? he couldn’t tear his eyes away. he hated you. he hated jungwon. but there was something else too. but he kept on watching, he needed to see it—to burn the image into his mind so he’d never forget. so he could walk away from you both forever. and when jungwon reached for your limp wrist, lifting it in a grotesque imitation of a wave. that was the final straw. jay stormed out of the room, the door slamming hard behind him, the sound echoing through the house. the bouquet of flowers lay forgotten on the floor, just like everything else.
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you stared at your reflection in the bathroom mirror, water dripping from your body, washing away the remnants of jungwon’s touch. but no matter how much you scrubbed, the feeling of him stayed, clinging to your skin, humming in your veins. and the guilt—it sat in your chest like a weight, suffocating, crushing, making it hard to breathe. you couldn’t deny it—you didn’t even want to. you wanted him. you had wanted him for longer than you’d ever been willing to admit, even to yourself. there had always been something between you two, something dark and magnetic, pulling you toward him, something you didn’t fully understand. but wanting him came at a price, one you weren’t ready to pay. your reflection stared back at you, hollow-eyed, cheeks stained with tears that wouldn’t stop falling. jungwon’s hands, his breath, his lips—they were all still on you, etched into your skin. it made your stomach twist in knots, a tangle of longing and disgust. how could you want something that felt so wrong? so twisted? but was it really wrong? the two of you weren’t even related by blood. you didn’t ask for your parents to marry each other, you didn’t want any of this. when jungwon stepped into the bathroom, naked, his eyes dark and possessive, you couldn’t help the way your pulse quickened. his presence filled the space like a shadow, and you couldn’t escape it. didn’t want to, really. the tension between you two was suffocating, and yet you craved it. his eyes locked onto yours, something soft flickering beneath the possessiveness, a hint of caution. he didn’t wait for an invitation—just closed the door behind him and stepped toward you, as if he had every right. his gaze stayed on yours, but there was hesitation in the air, uncertainty mixed with that overwhelming pull.
"do you hate me?" his voice was quiet, barely above a whisper. your throat tightened, the words sticking to the back of your throat, almost too heavy to say. "i... i don’t hate you," you whispered, your voice shaking. "but i hate myself." he stepped closer, his hand reaching for yours, but you flinched, pulling back, creating space between you that you didn’t really want. you ached for him, craved his touch, but the shame was too much. it felt wrong. he felt wrong. and then jay... jay didn’t deserve any of this. and from the look on your face, jungwon knew exactly who you were thinking about. his jaw clenched, his expression hardening slightly, but his voice stayed soft, coaxing. "forget about him," he murmured, leaning in close enough that his forehead brushed against yours. his breath was warm, his presence overwhelming. "he doesn’t matter." you shook your head, a sob catching in your throat. "he does matter. he trusted me, jungwon. he didn’t deserve this. how do i even look him in the eye again? i destroyed him." "i can’t—" your voice cracked, the guilt too heavy, threatening to drown you. "i need to talk to him. i need to make things right." jungwon’s fingers tightened around your wrist, his grip firm, possessive. his face hardened. "don’t," he said sharply, his voice taking on an edge. "he’ll only hurt you. he’ll say things that’ll tear you apart. i’m not letting you do that to yourself." "i can’t just pretend this didn’t happen!" your voice wavered, panic rising in your chest. "i work with him, jungwon. how am i supposed to face him? how do i show up?"
"you don’t," jungwon replied, his tone softer but still firm. "call in sick for the week. take time off. you don’t need to put yourself through that right now." there was that possessiveness again, woven into every word, like he didn’t want you anywhere near jay. not now. maybe not ever. "i need work," you mumbled, more to yourself than to him, but the thought of walking into that office, of facing jay after everything, made your stomach churn. "but maybe you’re right..." "i am right," jungwon said, kissing your temple gently, his lips lingering there like a promise. "you don’t need to see him. not now." his words were soft, but there was an underlying intensity. and even though the guilt still weighed heavy on your chest, there was something comforting in the way he held you, kissed you, tried to make the weight lighter. "but i can’t forgive myself," you whispered, pulling back enough to look him in the eyes. "i can’t just forget what i did to him." his gaze softened slightly, a flicker of something close to regret crossing his face. "i’m sorry," he murmured, voice low. "i didn’t want to hurt you. but i couldn’t stop myself." "i know," you whispered back, feeling the conflict tearing you apart. "but jay didn’t deserve this. he didn’t deserve to be hurt." "you don’t need to see him," jungwon repeated, his tone firm again, his grip tightening just enough to remind you that he wasn’t letting you go. "you don’t owe him anything."
"it’s not about owing him," you said, trying to explain, but your voice was trembling. "it’s about what i did. i need to make things right." jungwon’s eyes darkened, his jaw clenching. "he’ll just hurt you. i won’t let that happen." his tone was final, possessive. you nodded, but your mind was elsewhere, lost in thoughts of jay—of what he’d seen, of how you’d betrayed him. how could you ever face him again? jungwon’s hand cupped your face, his thumb brushing away the tears that had started falling again. "don’t break yourself over him," he whispered, pressing his lips to yours, soft, lingering. "i love you." and as he pulled you into his arms, your tears soaking into his skin, the guilt and shame still weighed heavy in your chest. you didn’t want to feel this way, didn’t want to let jungwon go either. you were trapped between the ache in your heart and the warmth of jungwon’s arms, knowing you couldn’t escape either.
"i'm so fucked, won," you whimpered, your voice barely audible, thick with guilt and desperation. jungwon’s hand tightened around you, pulling you closer, his breath warm against your ear. "no, you’re not," he whispered, voice low and soothing, even though his grip was firm, possessive. "you’re mine." you trembled in his arms, your mind spinning with the weight of everything. the shame, the guilt, the way your body still craved his touch despite it all. "how can you say that?" your voice cracked. "i’ve destroyed everything. i can’t—" he cut you off, his lips brushing your temple softly, "you didn’t destroy anything. you just did what you’ve always wanted. what we’ve both wanted." you shook your head, tears slipping down your cheeks again. "but jay—" "forget him," jungwon growled softly, his tone darkening, fingers digging into your skin. "he doesn’t matter anymore. i’m the one who’s here. i’m the one who wants you, who’s always wanted you." he tilted your chin up, forcing you to look at him, his eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that made your breath hitch. "you’re not fucked, y/n. you’re right where you need to be."
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after a few days of silence, when things had started to feel somewhat normal—if you could even call it that—your phone buzzed with a message. you glanced at it, not expecting anything out of the ordinary. but when you saw the name, your stomach twisted.
jay.
your hands trembled as you unlocked your phone, heart pounding in your chest. the message wasn’t what you’d hoped for, though a part of you knew it wouldn’t be kind. not after everything you've done.
jay: slacking off because you’re busy fucking your brother? i didn’t think you’d let this affect your job.
the words hit you like a slap, cold and sharp. your blood boiled, anger mixing with the shame that had been eating away at you. he didn’t understand. he couldn’t. this wasn’t just about that one night; this was bigger than that, more complicated. but how could he ever see that?
you felt a surge of emotions—anger, guilt, frustration—rising inside you, clouding your thoughts. maybe you did feel a little mad. mad that jay could reduce everything to something so ugly, so cruel. but also mad that you had no way to make him understand.
without thinking, you started typing back a response, your fingers flying over the keys, not even caring what you’d say at this point.
you: fuck you, jay. you don’t know shit—
but before you could hit send, jungwon was there, his hand grabbing the phone from your grip with a swift, firm motion.
"don’t," he said, his voice low, warning. “don’t respond.”
you snapped your head toward him, anger flashing in your eyes. “give it back,” you demanded, reaching for the phone, but jungwon held it out of your reach, his expression unreadable.
“you don’t need to answer him,” jungwon said, his voice calm, “he’s just trying to get under your skin.”
“well, it worked,” you spat, your chest heaving with frustration. “he doesn’t understand. he’ll never understand.” jungwon’s jaw clenched, and he stepped even closer, his presence overpowering, almost suffocating. "he’ll be fine. people get hurt, they get over it. he’ll move on, and so will you." his hand reached out, fingers brushing against your cheek, wiping away a tear that slipped down. "you don’t owe him anything. not an explanation, not an apology. nothing." you wanted to fight back, to argue with him, but the weight of everything had worn you down. maybe jungwon was right. maybe time would heal it, or at least make it easier to bear. the guilt and shame wouldn’t go away overnight, but maybe you could deal with it when the time came. maybe when things weren’t so fresh. for now, you’d have to let it go. at least for a little while.
"you don’t get it," you whispered, your voice barely audible. "i need to apologize. i need to make things right with him."
"not right now, you don’t." jungwon’s fingers curled around your wrist, pulling you closer to him. his voice softened, but there was that possessiveness still lingering in every word. "you’ll deal with it when you’re ready. but not now."
you let out a shaky breath, leaning into him, the warmth of his touch soothing the storm of emotions inside you. it was hard to let go of the guilt, but the pull of jungwon was stronger—always had been. maybe time would heal the wounds, maybe someday you’d be able to face jay. you would apologize to him. one day.
jungwon tilted your chin up, his lips brushing against yours in a soft kiss, one that slowly deepened, and you let yourself melt into it. the warmth of his body, the way his hand cradled the back of your neck—it was enough to quiet your mind, to let the guilt slip away, if only for a moment.
when the kiss broke, jungwon’s eyes were dark, full of that same need, one that you had grown addicted to. his thumb brushed over your lips. "you don’t need to deal with him right now. not when he’s just going to say shit to hurt you."
you hesitated for a second, but as jungwon’s lips found yours again, as his hands slipped down your waist, you were convinced. maybe you were just being true to yourself, following what you wanted, even if it came with consequences.
"okay," you breathed, your voice barely above a whisper.
jungwon smiled, a small, satisfied smirk that sent a thrill through you. he knew he had you.
"good girl." he whispered, his lips brushing against your ear before he kissed your neck, slow and deliberate.
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jungwon was in the kitchen, apron on, focused on flipping the eggs just right. the sound of sizzling filled the space, and the familiar smell of breakfast hung in the air. this had become routine, the comfortable quiet that came from knowing you were still sound asleep in his bed, wrapped up in his shirt, your playful remarks slowly making a comeback, the little jabs at each other that made things feel normal again.
it took a while, but you were both taking it step by step. he smiled to himself as he wiped his hands on a towel, stepping toward the hallway. he quietly peeked into the room—his room now, really. there you were, tangled in the sheets, looking peaceful, beautiful as always. jungwon lingered in the doorway for a moment longer, his heart swelling at the sight of you. it felt right. because you belonged there, with him. a knock echoed through the house. jungwon takes off his apron and tossed it on the kitchen counter but not before turning the stove off, moving toward the door. the knock came again, sharper this time. "just a second," he called out.
he opened it. standing there, dressed casually—loose jeans and a black band shirt, a faded logo barely visible on the front. the figure was hunched slightly, typing something on their phone, fingers moving quickly across the screen. staring down at his phone, brow furrowed in concentration, before slowly lifting his gaze. their eyes met, and for a moment, neither of them moved. jay. neither spoke. jay’s face was hard to read. jungwon didn’t say a word, but his body tensed, eyes locked on jay’s. both of them just stood there, the weight of everything unspoken hanging between them, thick and heavy in the air. and then, as if on cue, the phone in jungwon’s back pocket vibrated. the sound was subtle but sharp, breaking the silence. jay’s eyes flickered down to jungwon’s pocket. jungwon’s lips twitched, and slowly, a smirk spread across his face.
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hellodragonkit · 2 months ago
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Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Opinions and Points.
SPOILERS... obviously.
Ok I watched the movie, and ... some things that are my own personal thoughts and possible points I noticed. And some things I have seen others point out to where this is just my over all opinion and its kinda long.
The backstory lets not forget beetle is a unreliable narrator as proven by the first movie as Julliard and Harvard did not exist while he was alive, and unless he was possessing someone when they graduated its unlikely he said the truth. - so I don't think he gave us the full backstory. Maybe yes he did marry her, but given he never dies on screen and previously stated point. I just find it hard to believe that he drank a poison then had enough strength to chop her up as much as she was, if it was actually effecting him. i find it far more possible he had already been poisoned so often he was immune at that point. and was just pissed his new wife tried to do him in. Also in first movie it was suggested with the red mark he hung himself... maybe he tried to take over the death cult and had to do himself in for a quicker death?
the Newspapper. Yes it did say people were falsely accused of offing themselves at death, I think this was to help clear up the plot hole that would have been with Astrid's dad. And maybe be a red haring for Beetle. Next few points are BeetleBabes related so if you don't like the ship, please move on.
He gave her autonomy in his power. During the therapist scene when he "sewn" her mouth shut, it was less truly sewn and more duct taped. She had the ability to remove it, yeah he had it stick long enough for a gag, but not much more. He didn't force her.
The Contract and Nullification of it. Beetle wrote the contract, and he worked as a dead con man for years, he knew the handbook inside and out. He wrote up the contract for Lydia to sign and save her daughter, knowing there was a Massive Loop hole. even blowing a hole in the "back door" of the Neither to insure the loop hole was as big as it could be the second he had her sign, obviously with a bit of theatrics for both signing and explosions. But would we expect anything else from him?
Delia calling him: when Delia died, she called him asking to go to Lyd's wedding. He did so no questions no strings. Any other deal he always asked for something in return but for Lyd's step mom he didn't charge a dime, possibly because he felt Lyds would be upset if she missed it, and didn't get to say good bye.
Rory Beetle obviously didn't like him, could tell he was scamming Lyds, and yeah he probably could have sent him off but instead had to prove to Lydia why that guy was bad, hence why he used truth serum. He need to make sure she wouldn't go back to that guy once he was gone again. It was even hinted he heard her talking in the graveyard rushing to the church that she was not ready to marry.
He planed to go away. His song at the end, was not one of love and togetherness. MacArthur Park is more of loss and remorse. He was saying Goodbye to Lydia! Not permanently anyway
He set up sending away Deloris and helped the contract become Null When Deloris burst in through the door, the wind didn't effect Lydia, or Beetle, or Delia but the book slid to Astrid as easily as it had moved away, He moved it to her, conveniently on the page to summon sand-worms and how to brake the contract.
He stalled for the cops I find it funny how in the first movie he summoned a Man of the cloth and the guests. But this time he had both, and unlike the first time he wasn't rushing... he took his time to sing a whole song and to let the Neither cops show up, possibly also baiting Deloris to take care of her but I'm still not sure on that bit. ether way He had won, he had Lydia, the pastor, and guests. But instead he did a song and dance, a song that I already pointed out was one more of goodbye.
He let Lydia send him away. Beetle loves to make a entrance, he also may love to make a exit. he has also shown he can silence someone for just saying his name once. But instead of silencing her or taking over her voice as he had before. He started a dramatic plea, showing her he was getting sent away, showing her he was going to let her send him off.
The ending given the fact he may have over heard about Rory, And all the other notes, he could probably see Lydia wasn't wanting marriage at that time. But I also feel... he just likes the chase. What fun would it be if the Coyote already caught the road runner? he didn't mind her sending him away, because it means he could keep trying to get her to call him willingly. Over all this is just my ramblings that I don't have any friends irl who may appreciate them or be able to properly counter lol And if you made it this far thank you. And I hope you liked the movie as much as I did.
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jrswritings · 3 months ago
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Tingles and Giggles - Chapter Seven - Tyler Owens x Reader
Get caught up with Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, and Chapter Six! Masterlist :)
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Chapter Seven - Playin' Games
After driving for a half hour, your stomach decided to make an appearance by growling loudly just when the radio was switching songs. Your arms immediately covered your stomach, not like it mattered, you both knew where the gurgle came from. 
“Food is only five more minutes away, think you can last that long or will you wither away into nothing?” He asked, rubbing his thumb along your knuckles. 
“I think I’ll be okay,” you said, rubbing your belly, “I’m not sure about my stomach though.” 
As soon as you rounded the corner, there was a cute little red barn-shaped building next to a little convenience shop. The outside sign read ‘The Barn.’
“Is this where we’re eating? It barely looks like it would fit 50 people!” You said, sitting up in your seat. 
“Yep! My mom and I used to come here when I was a young kid and get breakfast on our way to Wyoming to watch my dad in one of the rodeos out there,” he said, “He started my love for riding but after so many accidents I had to switch to tornadeos.” 
“We’ll have to go to one sometime, there’s plenty of them down in Salado,” you said, “They use one of my parent’s bulls.” 
Once he parked, you opened your door and slid out of your seat. 
“Little lady you get back in the truck and let me open that door for you!” Tyler said in a rush, getting out of the driver's side and jogging around the front of the truck to grab the door. 
“Ty, I’m a grown woman and can open and close doors all by myself,” you said, patting his chest and walking by him. 
“But I’m here so that means you don’t have to,” he said, catching up to you while you walked into the little diner. 
“Let me be independent while also being a gentleman,” you said. 
“Hello, kids! C’mon in and sit where ever you’d like!” The waitress called from behind the small wall of delicious pies. 
Tyler led you over to a booth near a window, rolling up the shade slightly. 
Another waitress came over with menus, silverware, and glasses of water.
“Howdy, my name is Brandi and I’ll be your server, is there anything else you’d like to drink besides the water? We have lemonades, sweet teas, and Coke products,” she said while setting everything down on the table and taking out a notepad. 
“I’ll have a sweet tea, please,” you said, picking up the menu to start mulling over your options. 
“I’ll do the same, thank you,” Tyler said, rubbing his foot on yours under the table. 
“Comin’ right up, sugar,” she said and walked off to the counter with a little too much pep in her step. This started a little fire inside of you that you didn’t know could be lit. 
Tyler saw your facial expression change over the top of the menu as you gave Brandi a slight glare. 
“Calm down, baby girl,” he said softly, reaching across the table and putting a hand over yours, “You’re all I have eyes for.” 
You sighed, looking up at him. “What are you getting?” 
“Well, probably a burger,” he said, glancing down at their menu. 
“I’ll probably do the same,” you said, closing the menu and setting it at the front of the table, “Burgers are usually my, what I call, safe meal. It’s hard to mess up on a burger and fries.” 
“I get that, as a kid my meal used to be chicken tenders and fries,” he said, taking a drink of his water and looking at the menu.
The waitress came back over, setting the teas down on the table, “Alright you two, here are those teas and what can I get started for you?” 
“Let my wife order first, I usually wait to see what she gets before ordering as I most times end up switching because she says mine looks better,” he said gesturing to you with a smile. 
Hearing him call you his wife shocked not only you but the waitress as well. You looked over at him and he winked at you. 
“I’ll have a California burger with no onions, fries, with a side of ranch please,” you said, trying your best to remain calm after being called Tyler’s wife when you two aren’t even dating. 
“And for you sir?” The waitress asked, keeping her eyes on her notepad. 
“I’ll have a bacon cheeseburger with fries,” he said, “Along with a slice of apple pie for us to share, it’s her favorite.” 
“I’ll put your order in and it should be out in 10 minutes, would you like whipped cream on the pie?” She asked, grabbing the menus off the table. 
“Honey, what do you think?” He asked, grabbing your hands on top of the table.
“I would love some, thank you, Brandi,” you said, smiling up at her and rubbing his knuckles with your thumb. 
“Will do,” she said and walked to the kitchen. 
“Your wife?!” You whisper shouted at Tyler. Granted, you didn’t fully mind as Mrs. (Y/n) Owens had a ring to it, but it was more so unexpected. 
“I didn’t like how upset you got by her callin’ me sugar, so I had to improvise and that’s what I came up with,” he said, “Are you sayin’ you wouldn’t want to be married to this teddy bear?” 
“Only time will tell, Owens,” you said, taking a drink of your tea. 
“Playin’ games, are we now, honey?” He asked, leaning onto his elbows that were resting on the edge of the table. 
“No, but need I remind you that this is technically our first date?” You asked him quietly. 
“Nope, I just love seein’ you blush,” he said, reaching over and pinching your cheek softly. 
You slapped his hand away playfully, “Okay Grandpa, you can quit pinching me.” 
“But why? Your cheeks are just too cute,” he said, making his voice sound like he was 40 years older. 
“Oh stop it, baby,” you said, noticing how smoothly that slipped off your tongue. 
“See honey, by the end of the day you’ll be calling me hubby and all will be well in the world,” he said, a cheesy smile coming to his face. 
“Don’t test your luck, Owens,” you said, wagging one of your pointer fingers at him. 
“Alright, alright,” he said, holding his hands up as a surrender. 
“Bacon cheeseburger for you sir,” Brandi said, sliding a basket in front of Tyler. 
“That looks good,” you said, ogling over his burger. 
“See? In five minutes we’ll have different baskets,” Tyler joked with the waitress. 
“And a California burger with fries and ranch for you, ma’am,” she said, “I’ll be over with the pie in a few minutes. Is there anything else you two need?” 
“This will be all, thank you,” he said, looking over at you and then at the waitress. 
As she walked away, Tyler looked at you practically drooling over his burger basket. 
“Do you want to trade?” He asked, nudging the basket towards you. 
“No, no,” you said, “That’s what you ordered, I’ll let you enjoy it.” 
“If you say so,” he said, taking a big bite of the burger. 
You grabbed a few fries and dipped them in the ranch, then stuffed them in your mouth. As you chewed you did a slight wiggle in your seat. Tyler watched you do that while taking a few fries and eating them. 
“Do you always wiggle after you eat fries with ranch on them?” He asked, using a fry to point to you, the fries, and the ranch. 
“Just think of it as the negative, hangry mood leaving my body per se,” you said, taking a bite of your burger. 
“Is it because you love fries and ranch?” He asked, smiling slightly. 
You nodded and grabbed a few more fries while you finished the bite you just took, not wanting to look like you were starving and shoveling the food into your mouth faster than you could chew. 
“I’ll remember that,” he chuckled, taking a big drink of his sweet tea. 
“Here’s that warmed apple pie with whipped cream on top for the lovely couple,” the waitress that originally greeted you said as she placed the pie with two spoons in front of you. 
“Thank you,” you said after swallowing your bite. 
“Is there anything else I can get you, or is it alright if I grab the tab?” She asked, “You’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like to keep out of the Oklahoma heat.” 
“Maybe a box and to-go forks for the pie? The burgers have been more filling than I think either of us realized,” Tyler said, patting his stomach. 
“Let me go put it in the container for you, hon,” she said, grabbing the plate and walking to the kitchen. She came back two minutes later with the pie in a styrofoam container, two plastic forks, and the tab. 
“Thank you so much, we appreciate it,” you said, finishing the last of your burger. 
“Of course, sugar! Thank you for choosing The Barn, please come back anytime!” She said, walking back to the kitchen. 
Tyler left cash on the table for the bill and put his hat back on, then slid out of his seat after finishing his tea. He stood up straight, grabbed the container with the slice of pie, and then held out his hand for you. You sucked down what was left of your tea and grabbed his hand while sliding out of the booth. 
“Have a great day!” The older waitress called out as you both walked out the door.
“Damn, you must have scared off the other waitress by calling me Mrs.Owens,” you laughed, “She never came back.” 
“Good!” He said, giving you a wide grin while holding the door open. 
Want more? Here's Chapter Eight!
Taglist: @fanboyswhore9 @faith719
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boyfridged · 5 months ago
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i want to thank lovely @ekleiipsis for her contribution to amani’s campaign (amani reached her goal!) and many others. if you’d like to help out, please check my spotlight list. i am currently taking prompts for ficlets in exchange for proof of donation. details here. this is a ficlet written based on mar’s prompt (jay for the first time in the manor!). it’s 1086 words. enjoy.
(don't you wonder, sometimes?)
Jay does not go home. Or he does. The manor is his new home. This is what Bruce Wayne — Bruce Wayne!, not that he knew anything about him besides the vague recollection of rare headlines, tells him after taking the cowl off. There are black smudges of makeup around his eyes. And fluttering bats above them, on the cave’s ceiling.
“Theatre. And this— This is more of a palace,” Dad would say, probably. Well. Dad is not here.
Bruce Wayne is. Tall, but his smile is small. His steps, though, again – bigger. He is still wearing shoes even as he walks out of the silent clock, into the house, which is bizarre enough. Jason takes his boots off, because that’s the normal thing to do, even if Batman does not seem to know (or care). Then Jay ought to take twice as many strides for each of the man next to him, his legs too short to compare.
The corridor is so long that it feels almost like a trip, especially with the backpack hanging from his shoulder.
They make just one stop, in the kitchen, which is almost as big as the flat of his family. The fridge is the size of two regular ones, too. Wayne opens it and there are rows of products there, neater than the fancy convenience store displays. He takes an energy drink out of it and hands it to Jason. Then, he closes the fridge and takes a packet of granola from the cupboard next to it.
“Alfred is normally around to fetch snacks, but he seems to have gone to bed early,” Bruce Wayne says, scratching his neck awkwardly.
“Okay,” Jay replies, because he does not know who Alfred is. It is a posh name, all round sounds as he mouths it to himself. Better to remember.
“Sorry. You will get a real meal first thing in the morning. Is almond butter fine?”
Jay nods at the absurd question, accepting the bowl. “Okay,” he repeats, to fill in the silence, moving his weight to the other feet. 
“You must be tired. You can eat in your room.”
Because Jay is supposed to have a room of his own now. Right.
And they make their way there. First, there are more stairs — again, way too many. There’s also a portrait in the hall, a couple in what his mom would call “evening” clothes, and a boy, younger than him. They pose the way people in old pictures do. Jay almost stops to look at it, but Wayne is already at the top of the stairway. It would be easier to keep up by grasping at his sleeve, but Jay’s hands are full. They pass a vase without flowers. Maybe rich people don’t get flowers either. 
Batman halts in a spot that looks more lived in than the others. On the left, there’s a door with a “Keep out!” sign and some postcards. Pyramids. Some generic beaches. A huge, gold statue of Buddha. A very realistic rendition of a dinosaur. He gestures on the door across, on the right.
“You can have this one.”
For a moment, Jay just stands there, a bowl of granola with a bottle of energy drink on top of it balanced in one arm, and a pair of boots held in the other hand, suddenly sweaty. His heart hammers quickly, rabbit-like. 
“Okay,” he says, through a constrained throat, realising that what they are waiting for is his own reaction. Only then Bruce Wayne opens the door. 
Jay almost takes a step back, but that would mean walking into the man behind him. So instead he enters the bedroom. It’s not big, but it looks like it's from a period drama, which is intimidating enough. He puts the bowl on the desk. His shoes in the empty wardrobe.
Wayne disappears for a moment and comes back with a set of blue bedding, some rather big looking clothes (though Jay can’t imagine the guy in a Bowie’s 1983 tour t-shirt, so maybe it’s not his) and a hotel-like set of toiletries. Jay mutters a quiet “thanks.”
“You should rest. I will let you know when we have breakfast.” Wayne says, and after a pause asks, as if trying to speak his language: “Okay?” 
Jay attempts a smile, nodding. But Batman doesn't leave. He looks at him, and Jason is now feeling even more nervous, because the panda eyes make him want to giggle. This probably would not be an issue – he already mocked Batman plenty, called him names even – what was he thinking!, but now… He swallows, tongue suddenly heavy in his mouth. Since he entered the car (Batmobile!) all the adrenaline, both from danger and excitement, came down, like from a punctured balloon. And now he is facing a stranger. His confidence is just as deflated, old shyness taking over.
Batman looks like he wants to add something. He says nothing - well, a “goodnight” and resigns himself to briefly – almost absent-mindedly, touching Jason’s temple. The gesture reminds Jay of the priest from the cathedral in the East End. The one who called all the kids “lambs.” It’s kind. And even the expression on Batman’s face is familiar – a mix of puzzlement and worry. 
Then Jay is left alone in the museum-like room. 
He takes his belongings out of the backpack. Two sets of clothes, no fresh PJs – that Serious Moonlight Tour t-shirt might be helpful tonight after all. The battered picture of his parents. This is all he had with himself at the boarding school. And this is where they stopped. Not– not home.
“Okay,” he whispers to himself. Or sniffs. “This is home now.”
He puts the photograph on the bedside table. Except this way, his parents are facing not just the mattress, but also the window. And outside the window, in the darkness – nothing. A field of grass, some decorative plants, their shapes slightly menacing, tilting from the wind. The air here in Bristol is so fresh that the night is black, not grey. And there are stars, so many! Still, the silence– 
“Space for a whole campsite,” Dad would say. But the more Jay tries to imagine Dad here, the more uneasy he feels. And Mom, she'd laugh– “Give it up, Willis. I’m a city girl.” 
Jay touches the small, crumpled faces printed on the shiny paper. Hugs it close to his heart. And then, he puts it under the pillow. 
Today he will learn to sleep in the quiet. The price for the night sky.
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kenyauslander · 6 months ago
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Fic title: How To Say Goodbye
(deciding to write a short story for this one, I love this title so much and there are so many avenues I can take with it, fic will be trimmed for user convenience)
How to Say Goodbye
"Well, today's the day, isn't it?" The text reads. I look over to my closet and see the cap and gown hanging up on the door. I sigh and reach for my phone, texting Hayden back.
"I guess so." I reply back, setting my phone down on my nightstand again. I take a deep breath and let out a shaky sigh. Who ever said graduation would be the easiest and most non-emotional thing in the world? Nobody, apparently. I lay in bed for a while longer before deciding to be a functioning member of society today. Well, I'd have to be, if I'm attending my own high school graduation.
I roll out of bed and stretch a bit. Every single joint seems to pop and crack at once. I blink and wipe away some tears that I should be saving for graduation. I hear some commotion in the hallway, and there's a knock on my door.
"Liebling, can I come in?" Mom asks.
"Yeah. Just waking up." I reply, watching the door open and seeing my mom step in, holding a few beautiful bouquets of flowers.
"These are for you, liebling. This one is from Hayden's grandparents, Victoria and Victor, this one is from Mrs. Stein and Mr. Hyde, and this last one is from everyone in the family. Me, your father, Jess and Keiko, all your aunties and uncles, your cousins and your grandparents on both sides of the family." Mom says, handing me the bouquets, mainly comprised of roses, baby's breath, and phlox, which are my personal favorite. The bouquets were already in a vase of water, so that helps me a lot.
"Thank you, mom. I'll get going on those thank you notes. Promise." I reply, setting the vase on my vanity.
"We also sent a bouquet to Hayden, just letting you know now." Mom replies, before exiting my room and keeping the door slightly ajar. I see Keiko peek his head in. I gesture for him to come in. He walks in, dressed and slightly cologned.
"So, sister, I hear you are graduating." Keiko says, walking right up to me.
"Yes, Keiko. I'm graduating. Next year is your graduation." I reply.
"Affirmative. I would like to extend my congratulations in the form of human contact otherwise known as a handshake." Keiko says, sticking his hand out for a handshake. I shake his hand.
"Thank you." I reply. Keiko actually smiles back at me, and it's not one of those forced smiles he's notorious for doing. He turns around and walks out of my room. Well, at least he didn't say anything too weird, I think to myself.
Some time passes, and I put on my cap and gown to take some pre-graduation photos with Hayden. Why? Memories, our parents say. Can't blame them though, their parents were probably the same way when they graduated. But, will there be as many tears as I think there will be? I hope not, because my mascara is not waterproof. I make sure I have everything I'll need. My small purse, phone, wallet, gum, earbuds, mini tissues, lipstick. I'm set. I zip up the gown and walk out into the living room. Mom looks up from her sudoku and gasps.
"Liebling, you look so precious!" Mom exclaims, standing up from her chair. She comes over and fixes my hair, and my cap. She smiles so big.
"Wow, you clean up nice, kid." Dad says, the first words he's spoken all day. He goes back to his newspaper, doing the crossword. Jessica looks over and claps excitedly.
"You look so cute, Cyn!" Jess exclaims.
"You sure about that, Jess? It's a literal graduation cap and gown. How is it cute?" I ask. I raise an eyebrow and wait for an answer.
"It just does. I can't wait to graduate. You think I'll fit in your gown? Oh wait, I wouldn't, I'm a little more well-"
"Jessica, can it." Dad warns. He rolls his eyes and goes back to his newspaper once again. I swear I heard him mumble something akin to 'Damn kids' in Russian, but who's to say? Jess rolls her eyes and goes back to whatever she was doing. Mom looks back over at me and smiles again.
"You ready to go take the photos?" Mom asks. I nod, and she nods in response. She gets up and grabs her purse and camera. I head out the door and hold it open for her.
"Thank you, liebling." Mom replies, as she shuts the door behind her. I start heading next door. Hopefully Hayden is ready and not deciding what kind of shirt he's going to wear underneath his gown. I told him we should match, but is he going to listen to me? Of course not. He cares more about Malcolm's opinion than anything. I go up to the door and knock.
"Come in, Cynthia! Hayden, Cynthia is here to take photos! You ready?" Mrs. Stein asks. She opens the door to see me in front of her. She smiles so big and hugs me.
"You look so adorable. You really do. It seems like just yesterday you were graduating kindergarten... and look at you now. Such a sophisticated young woman." She says, still hugging me, her perfume rubbing off onto me. Still one of the best feelings in the world. She lets go and lets me into the house. I walk in and do not see Hayden right away.
"Mrs. Stein, where's Hayden?" I ask.
"Oh, he's choosing a shirt to wear with his gown." She replies, picking up Alicia from her spot on the floor. I nod and head to Hayden's room. I knock on the door and enter his room. He looks over to see who it was, and waves. I walk in and stand in the doorway.
"So, help me pick out a shirt. The white one, the yellow one, or the Hawaiian shirt?" He holds up three shirts, comparing them against his white tank top.
"Yellow shirt." I reply, almost deadpan. Hayden tosses the white shirt back into his closet and holds up the yellow shirt and the Hawaiian shirt.
"I'll ask Malcolm." Hayden says, pulling out his phone to text Malcolm. I roll my eyes. Hayden texts Malcolm, and his phone dings quite quickly. He checks his phone, and tosses the yellow shirt into his closet.
"Let me guess, he said the Hawaiian shirt?" I ask. He nods and puts the shirt on. He then puts the gown on and zips it up. He puts the cap on and fixes his outfit.
"Alright, let's get these photos over with. Then off to actual graduation to sit and wait for our dinky pieces of paper." Hayden says, letting me out of his bedroom first, to be chivalrous. I leave first, and head to the living room. Hayden follows me, and we both wait for our moms to stop talking and reminiscing. They see us and start taking out their phones first.
"Go over here," Mom says, gesturing for us to move. Hayden and I side-step over to where she says. "Nope, nope. Over here," She points. We move. "Ach mein Gott, no, follow my finger." We finally move and she gives us the thumbs up.
"Alright, lieblings, get close to each other. Act like you love each other," She says, holding her phone up. Hayden and I get closer to each other. "Come on. I know how close you two are. Closer." Mom commands. Hayden puts a hand on my shoulder and gets closer. He whispers something funny in my ear, and I start chuckling a little.
I hear the shutter click, and the first photo is taken. Then I pull Hayden in closer and strike another pose, just as the shutter clicks again.
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(these are their pre-graduation photos)
Some more time passes, and now I'm sitting in my chair, waiting for my name to be called so I can get my diploma and get dinner at Riverpoint. They're still in the Cs still, so Hayden has to wait a while as well. I glance at the program, and realize I have a long time to wait. I'm after Saoirse and Declan, but before Concerta and Octavia. Not many of us with last names beginning with S in the senior class, I see.
Pretty soon they get to the Hs, and I think Hayden is the only one.
"... Hayden Lee Hyde-Stein." The announcer says, as Hayden walks to the stage. Multiple whispers of "his middle name's Lee?" occur. Not surprised. I watch as Hayden walks across the stage and accepts his diploma. I hear "YEAH HAYDEN!" in the crowd. Five bucks it was Mrs. Stein, or my mom. There are loads of applause. Hayden starts walking back to his seat after shaking hands with what seems a million people. I think about it for a minute, and how many germs that must transfer. Not to be a germaphobe like Keiko, but yuck. I find some hand sanitizer under my chair (big thanks to the whole school system for providing that) and apply some. I wait for it to dry, and it does. Quite quickly in fact.
Even more time passes, and soon I'm going to be getting up, walking the stage to get my diploma, and then waiting for this to be over. Saoirse is called, then Declan.
"...Cynthia Jade Silver, graduating with honors." I stand up and start making my way to the stage as the crowd erupts into applause, my family and Hayden's family making all the noise. I walk onto the stage, receive my diploma, and shake hands with everyone who is on stage, the principal, superintendent, some town representative, and the mayor. I stop and pose for the forced photo of me holding my diploma and go back to my seat as they call Concerta up to the stage. I finally sit down. I open my little frame my diploma is in and smile a bit. The worst is finally over. I have persisted over the horrors. I close the frame and watch as the ceremony goes on.
Another half hour passes, and the ceremony is finally complete. The group of us students (former, I guess) all stand and chat with each other and teachers, congratulating each other. Hayden flags me down after talking to Eulalia and hugs me tight.
"I know about the bouquet," He mumbles, his voice breaking a bit. "I just wanted to come hug you for the last time."
"It's not the last time, I promise," I mumble back, holding him tight, my own voice breaking a bit as well. "don't say that, Hayden."
"Well, I mean, it's the last time we're going to hug each other as high school students." He laughs a little, not letting go of me.
"You scared me a bit," I reply, hugging Hayden tighter, acting like I'm not going to be going out to dinner with him in twenty minutes. "I thought you were going to tell me you were moving or something." Hayden and I finally let go of each other.
"If I was moving, I would've told you before today, silly." He laughs, wrapping his arm around me and pulling me close.
"I know." I reply, as we walk a bit, trying to catch up with our respective families.
"You know I just suck at saying goodbye." Hayden says, still having his arm wrapped around me as we walk. I can see some tears rolling down his face, as he can probably see it on my face too.
"I know, it's hard to say goodbye. It's even harder to figure out how to say goodbye." I say, my voice breaking even more.
"Well, you'll never have to worry about that," Hayden replies. "because you and I will always be together forever. No matter how far apart we drift, our friendship will always stay strong." He pulls me closer one more time, savoring the moment. We walk to our families, and we all walk away into the sunset.
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pollyna · 2 years ago
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Navy regs are in books that quote books that quote books. Ron has all of them somewhere in the house, with Tom's precise handwriting pointing out all the spelling issues and doing the theoretical maths his degree didn't help him to understand. In a less neat calligraphy, in some pages, Nick's notes are mixed with doodles and his own notes. Of Annapolis he will forever remember the heat and the hours in class, before their callsigns, when Nick used to make him late because he had to kiss him one minute more and Tom had the most convenient, and convicing, excuse for them.
(Maybe he could find some of those books and show them to Bradley the next time he's going to come around. He could probably appreciate them? Or maybe he should ask Maverick?)
Regs say no tattoo, but regs say a lot of shit Ice used to correct back then and that he corrected during the years. Regs say no tattoos, and Tom said they were stupid, so Ron got his first, then his second, and half of his right sleeve. The only people who know of them are his friends, his doctors, his mirror and his tattoo artist. Having to wear a shirt all day, and a jacket for most of it, has its advantages, even if he fucking hates being an admiral most of the time. But it's almost time; another couple of years, and he's going to retire and never again put a foot on a Navy base.
The studio isn't the biggest in town, but Ron knows the artist and their dad, and they are both the best for what he needs. He's so focused on the piece of paper between his hands that he almost misses two young women saluting him, with a half-panicked Adrmial Kerner, sir!
At ease, Lieutenants, glad to see someone knows where to get good ones. He smiles because he knows they shouldn't be there, but he shouldn't be either, so it's not really a problem. He's going to add something when something, someone, hugs his leg and has all his attention. Oh, who do we have here? George? You're so big now, boy! he picks up the kid. Mom is waiting for you! he points towards one of the rooms, and, in less than five steps he takes, George tells him all he can fit in, and it's a lot.
(Ron finds himself wondering if Bradley was the same at that age.)
So you're already back for the next piece, uhuh? a voice asks. You know, I can't live without you, hon, he answers, laughing loudly. They laugh with him, but it dies when he passes them the piece of paper. I'm so sorry, Ron, they murmur, and he finds himself smiling lightly, trying not to cry again, thank you Carly.
He takes off his jacket and then his shirt, and his right arm is colorful but not whole. Are you ready, big guy? they smile, dipping the tattoo gun in the red ink as ready as I was the first time he answers. Carly draws and talks, asking questions about the kid (he's a man now and he's almost as tall as me), about the kids (if they destroyed the base while I was gone, at least they're going to let me retire), about Tom and there, Ron has to take a breath because it fucking hurts. He doesn't know if it's the point they're working on or missing Tom or both, but he has to ask Carly to stop for a minute. (He was-the last few days were the hardest. Did you know he used to write mathematical formulas when he was bored during lessons? He and Nick were good friends, Tom was the reason behind the Mother Goose. I miss him. I miss them all Carly). Almost five hours have passed by the time it's done, and by that point they're humming random songs and listening to the description of the rock George found outside his school that same morning. All done, Admiral. You already know what you have to do, right? I'd like to see you next week to check on some of the edges around the elbow, but it's already looking pretty great. Ron barely hears her because he's so intent on looking at his arm, where now Tom's name is adorning his arm, just inches away from Nick and Carole's. Yeah, yeah whenever you want Carl'.
(It's seven in the evening and the cemetery is empty. The bouquet is a happy one, and his shirt leaves are already up. It's done, I finally finished it. He starts and you're here all together now. I miss both of you. I hope Tom's there too. I hope you're all okay now.)
The regs say no tattoos, and Tom said fuck 'em all, and now they are all there while he flies and teaches and lives another day, under his uniform and out in the open.
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furiousgoldfish · 3 years ago
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I don’t really know if my experience was abusive or not…. My home life was kinda all over the place growing up. My mum was initially a single mom but got married and had another child when I was 7. I sorta got pushed to the side at that point. My mum was busy with my younger sister and step-dad worked in camps for weeks on and weeks off, but even then I never really liked him that much. I learned how to get my own food, tuck myself into bed, entertain myself very quickly. I have a fear of showing pain or injury now because when I got hurt when I was younger I was often scolded and made to feel it was my fault. Got bit by the dog? Well what was I doing!? I shouldn’t have done that!! My little sister had an ear infection and was scolded (ie yelled at) because she didn’t say anything earlier and it was the weekend now and they can’t do anything about it (walk in clinics closed).
Growing up, my mother was always very strict about friends and play dates because they were apparently a lot of work. A friend would ask if I could come over after school and I would be so terrified to ask my mother I would near cry. I would ask and get scolded because “we don’t have time for that” or it’s “too last minute.” And I was always a very quiet child so I never pushed back, I just gave in and told her she was right.
When I expressed anxieties, or that I was really stressed and it was making me feel unwell, it was often ignored or flipped so that it was something I was doing wrong. And maybe they were right?
I would say I’m scared to do something or that something stresses me out and my step father would tell me to get over it because it’s life. When I had to change my diet for health reasons, he would say he checked packages that they were okay, but he didn’t and then I would feel unwell, and he wouldn’t believe me.
Basically, my parents were either not existing in my life, yelling at me for being hurt or being mad because something was going to cost money (and making me feel reallllyyyyy bad about it which has resulted in it being very hard for me to ask for things I needed), my parents also argue a lot, which always seriously stressed me out. Also a lot a lot a lot of shame about wasting from my step dad which has now led to me feeling sick to my stomach everytime something is slightly wasted, thrown out or not recycled.
But at the same time, as I got older I got Kinda closer to my mum?? But she was still very strict on friends and I knew that if I let her know most things that she would be mad, even though I was a textbook student. All this also paired with my grandmother’s constant dieting and telling me that I put on weight.., and patting my stomach. And then apologizing. And then when I try on clothes telling me I’m too too heavy… idk. I present a LOT of trauma symptoms, but I have lived a relatively blessed childhood.
Also probably important to note that I am suspected OCD or other anxiety disorder but undiagnosed.
Thank you for your blog and your time, both are incredibly helpful and I am very grateful.
That's really heartbreaking neglect, they couldn't even comfort you when you were in pain or injured, and you had to figure out everything yourself, like you had no parents at all. Yelling at children for being sick and injured is like kicking down someone who is asking you for help, it's despicable. I'm so sorry, that is absolutely abuse, and a serious case of neglect.
You were demanded to be a convenience and as little work as possible, to a great price for your childhood, you can't have a kid and then ask them to 'not be a lot of work' for you! It's not called work, it's raising your own kid! Besides, what kind of 'work' is a friend coming over, you have to say hi and maybe offer a snack? What kind of person considers that too much for their child's friendships?
Your parents are not right to blame and shame you for your anxiety and stress, they were supposed to help you feel better, comfort and reassure you, not make you feel worse and force you to doubt whether you're allowed to feel your feelings at all.
I'm so sorry for all they put you thru. It makes complete sense your stomach feels sick, that is so much violation and hate directed at you. You're more important than food. You're more important than your weight or whatever else they tried to make you feel horrible about. These people don't know you and have no right to comment on anything on you. They already hurt you enough.
I hope you get diagnosed and your struggles get a bit easier once you're sure of it and find more people you can relate to. Your childhood isn't blessed, it's already tainted with so much abuse, neglect, violation and hate, you have actual trauma symptoms. Trauma isn't a small issue that can be brushed aside. Your story is painful and it's not fair for you to have to live thru that.
And also, thank you for the kind words, I appreciate them.
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starylust · 4 years ago
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A Team of Lies⍨ Part 2.
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part 1
➙  synopsis - being the team manager for karasuno was really fun overall, but when you forget your phone in the gym and head back to get it some things were said that maybe you shouldn’t have heard. or maybe it was something you should’ve heard.
➙ pairing -  tsukishima x fem!reader ; hanamaki x fem!reader
➙ genre - ANGST, fluff:)
➙ word count - 1641
a/n - sorry i took a little to write this i had a few things going on. also dont mind how i completely changed the color scheme to my profile. anyway i hope you guys like this part:)
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The weekend went by pretty fast you may say. Although it was mostly just you laying in bed caught up in your thoughts, with red puffy eyes and a wet pillow, it did go by fast. 
Monday came and you did not want to go to school. So you told your mom you didn’t feel good. The next day comes by but you suddenly don’t feel well again. You had now missed school for a week.
No one knew where you were. No one knew if you were okay. But no one even bothered to stop by your house to check. No one came looking for their missing manager. Was it cause they already had two other ones?
What hurt most of all is one person didn’t even try and search for their girlfriend. The one who was supposed to love and care for you didn’t even try to make an effort to make sure you were okay. How were you supposed to feel?
As the weekend came by again you sat your mom down and had a talk with her. You explained how you didn’t feel comfortable going to Karasuno anymore and how you refused to go.
You didn’t go into much detail but by the expression on your face your mom could already tell something wasn’t right. She gave you an offer you couldn’t refuse. Although taking this offer would leave your mom all alone staying here would’ve been much worse.
As the weekend passes you have your stuff packed. The forms you needed were filled out and the bags you needed were already taken to your dad’s house. 
Your mom dropped you off with all your things giving you an apologetic smile. She wished she could’ve helped you through whatever it is you are going through. You gave her a nice long hug with a squeeze before thanking her for doing this for you.
You told her you’d try to visit as much as possible and that you’d miss her so much.
-
Laughter filled up your ears as the people around you laughed at the joke Matsukawa just made. Everyone had now calmed down a bit, a few giggles here and there but nothing much.
The Aoba Johsai boys made you laugh, they made you feel safe. They protected you against anyone who tried to step near you.
-
A month or two had now passed since you moved in with your dad. He happened to live near Aoba Johsai, so that is where you went since it was the most convenient. 
You had now become their manager since you needed a club to do. The Aoba Johsai team was so different from Karasuno you thought. Although they were similar in many ways they were way calmer. 
You had gotten real close with the third years of the team (especially makki!) He was so sweet and so caring towards you since the day you two met. When he first saw you he couldn’t take his eyes off of you.
The thought of having someone as beautiful as you as their manager made him really nervous. He thought maybe you’d be judgemental or mean, but you were none of those things.
You cared for the team as though they were your own family. Always checking up on them, bringing them snacks. You did whatever you could to help.
Even though you had managed to catch Hanamaki’s attention he had no clue he had caught yours too. You loved the way he smiled or the way his hair moved when he jumped.
The little things about him suddenly made you forget anything that happened a couple months ago. 
As time goes by your feelings for each other keep growing stronger, but none of you made a move. That is until Hanamaki got tired of holding back and confessed to you.
He gave you one of the cutest and sweetest confessions you had ever seen. Although it wasn’t much the letters, flowers and food were enough to make you say yes. You would’ve said yes even if he had just asked you with nothing in hand.
-
The day finally came to where you would have to face your old school again. The one where you felt like everyone was just playing with you, only using you for their own good. 
Not only that, how would they react when they see you? You had just disappeared out of nowhere and didn’t say a single thing to anyone. Hanamaki saw the nervousness on your face and walked up to you.
He grabbed your chin in his hand and tilted your head up. You looked at him with a tiny pout of your face from the anxiety creeping in. He gave a gentle kiss on your nose before pulling you into a hug.
“It’s alright love. You have us now and if they dare try anything all four of us will get them.”
You giggled into his chest as what he just said. You fell into his embrace and wrapped your arms around his torso and snuggled even more into his chest. You heard him slightly laugh at the gesture you just did, which he found adorable.
He pulled away giving you a quick peck before heading back to the courts. Before leaving though he reassured you that everything was going to be fine. As long as you didn’t overthink everything that was happening everything would be fine.
Your nerves had now calmed down a bit. Unfortunately they had risen back up listening to the gym door open. You saw as an orange haired boy basically sprinted through and placed his bag down near the bench. 
Your breathing now became irregular and you felt kind of light headed. A few seconds after Hinata walked in the rest of the team followed. The team did not make eye contact with you which did calm your nerves once more.
They had been too caught up in warming up that they didn’t even notice you. You were glad but also sad that they didn’t even see you just standing there. You brushed off those thoughts as soon as you heard footsteps running towards you.
You head flicked over into the directions to see Hanamaki running towards you. He put his hand near the bottom of your waist and pulled you in close. 
“You okay?” He asked looking down on you.
You gave him a slight nod saying yes. He smiled at you and gave you a kiss on your forehead. He unwrapped his arm from around your waist to head back to the courts. 
When he tried going back he felt a hand tug onto his wrist. He turned back to see you looking at him, but this time with a smile. He smiled back at you. Before any of you said anything you jumped onto him and put your arms around his neck.
“Good luck Hiro,” you whispered into his ear. A bright red blush appeared on his cheeks as you whispered into his ear. He smiled so brightly anyone looking could’ve sworn it was as bright as the sun. Before jumping off of him you gave him a nice kiss on the cheek for good luck.
All while this was happening though Karasuno had finally noticed you. Their eyes all widened at the affection you were giving Hanamaki. You and Tsukishima had never officially broken up so why were you in the arms of another guy?
The whole team stared at you before slowly turning their eyes to Tsukishima. They all saw the same stoic expression across his face. Was he not bothered by this?
Tsukishima was also staring at you with the rest of the team. His expression remained the same while his heart felt a strain. It felt like a knife had just pierced his heart and stayed there. 
The pain he felt was immeasurable to what he’s ever felt before. Was this what a heartbreak felt like? You disappeared out of nowhere. No goodbyes, no check ups, nothing. And now you were found here. Kissing another man infront of him.
He was so baffled but kept his same careless expression. If anyone looked close enough they could see the pain that filled his eyes. But he wouldn’t let someone that wasn’t you get that close.
Tsukishima wondered if you ever figured out he cheated. You probably just since you left without saying a word and disappeared. Had you known the team was keeping the secret from you as well? Is that why you ghosted all of them? 
Or he won’t anymore. He didn’t know why he was feeling this way. Wasn’t he the one who cheated on you. Who thought you were a nuisance and thought you were annoying? So why did it pain him so much to see you with him.
You looked so happy. Happier than you’ve ever been with him. He never got those tight hugs and goofy smiles you showed to Hanamaki. Why was that? Did you ever really like him in the first place?
Tsukishima was pulled out of his thoughts as he heard his teammate yelling at him. The game was now starting. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of you and Hanamaki though.
Hanamaki set you down onto the floor and moved your hair away from your ears. He moved his head next to your ear and returned a whisper.
“Thank you beautiful, I’ll be playing even better knowing a pretty girl is watching.”
He pulled back to see that you looked a little shy and embarrassed. Before you knew it you watched up walk off onto the court. Once he made it on the court he made eye contact with you and gave you a wink.
It’s surprising how he made you forget all about the team who treated you so poorly.
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next part:)
taglist: @fernandaweasley2 @nachotrash @buttrflyboy
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babyjamiebarnes · 4 years ago
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Build-A-Bear
Part One
Featuring: Bucky x Stark!reader, dad!Tony, Peter Parker (platonic), background MCU characters
Warnings: [chapter] language; [series] language, smut, violence
Summary: The only people who knew she was actually a Stark were her dad, her step-mom Pepper, and her “uncles” Happy and Rhodey. A promotion within Stark Industries takes her from an already-sought after position in the Weapons Anaylsis Unit straight to the Avengers as a Weapons Enhancement Specialist... which means her dad is her new boss. There’s only one rule at work: no fraternizing with coworkers. There’s one more rule at home: no dating any Avengers. So what is she supposed to do when a grumpy super soldier becomes not-so-grumpy around her? At 25, do her dad’s rules still apply? Or is her entire livelihood at risk?
Author’s Note: I’ve written a decent portion of this but know I won’t keep writing it or post it unless I hold myself accountable and get it out there in the first place 🙈 I haven’t written much for Marvel yet but I’ve read plenty and have written for other fandoms in the past (not to mention the writing degree on my wall lol). I’ll try to post every 2-3 days to keep this moving! And if you like it and want to, buy me a coffee!
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No one knew Tony Stark had a daughter. No one but Tony Stark and his daughter. Well, and her step-mom Pepper. And her godfather Rhodey. And her uncle-not-uncle Happy. But no one in their everyday lives knew. She was given her mother’s maiden name and kept a secret, even when she turned 17 and moved to a small apartment near NYU’s campus (with Happy stationed right next door, of course) to start life as a truly normal adult, or as close to normal as an undercover Stark could be. When she graduated with her PhDs in robotics and electrical engineering at 25 — proving brains really do run in the family — she moved into her own apartment in Manhattan, funded by her father under the pseudonym “Michael Myers.” Subtlety was never his strong suit.
Fortunately for you, growing up without the Stark name let you live a relatively normal life. It also allowed you to apply for a position within Stark Industries without being ushered past any red tape because of who your father is. Outside of the financial advantage you had, you worked for your spot in a STEM career. You suffered through every man in your field belittling your work despite knowing less than you. You dealt with the constant interruptions and “well, actually” because of your gender. You powered through late nights and early mornings when your mind was flowing too smoothly to quit.
The last thing you wanted to do was have all that work disregarded because you shared a name with genius billionaire playboy philanthropist Tony Stark. So you filled out the application, sent in your resume and cover letter, and attached three letters of recommendation from your professors. You went through hours of interviews, background checks (conveniently redacting your father’s name), and polygraph tests until that offer letter showed up in your email. You even had to sign the Non-Disclosure Agreements that would bar you from discussing *anything* work-related with anyone outside of your department.
You spent your first year in the weapons analysis department, evaluating alien weaponry and determining how it worked and how to disable it. You had your fair share of mishaps, of course. Holes blasted into walls, fried robot dummies, even burnt animal carcasses. By the end of your first year, your supervisor sent a commendation and proposal for you for an undisclosed promotion. After Pepper Potts “thoroughly examined your resume, cover letter, and accomplishments during your tenure with Stark Industries,” as the letter read, you were awarded a position working on the Avengers’ weapons as a Weapons Enhancement Specialist. You’d never see a fight in-person, but you were assigned to work on advancements and post-battle repairs for everyone, from the Winter Soldier’s arm to the Falcon’s wings to Vision’s... everything. The only heroes you wouldn’t work on were Iron Man and War Machine (those were your dad’s territory) and Spider-Man.
On your first day in your new position, the one and only Pepper Potts showed you to your new lab on the 47th floor. It took all your willpower to look your step-mother in the eye and say, “Wow, Miss Potts. This is amazing. It’s such an honor to meet you,” with a straight face to convince any passerby that you had no outside affiliation with her. Even if her eyes stayed steady on you, you could see her mentally rolling them.
Once you were alone behind the doors of the elevator, conversation changed course.
“You’re going to be sharing a lab with someone else,” Pepper said.
“Sweet. As long as they’re competent, that’s fine by me,” you shrugged. Part of earning your degrees was learning to share a workspace with others, even those who bumbled and fumbled with no idea what they were doing. You’d had more hair singed by nearby explosions than you’d like to admit.
“He’s still in college so he’s not here as often as the others. Most of his work will be on Spider-Man’s gadgets and suit, but you can use him for any help you need.”
Walking past the familiar faces of Dr. Banner and Dr. Cho in their respective labs, Pepper ushered you into your lab, where you were met by your father and put on the same excited facade you did with Pepper.
“Oh my god, you’re Tony Stark! This is incredible! It’s such an honor to meet you, sir!”
He shook his head at you and reluctantly accepted your outstretched hand. Oh, the jokes you’d be making at family dinners.
“Yeah, anyway, this is your new lab, Miss [Y/L/N]. Make yourself at home. This lab rat over here is mister Parker. If you have any questions, he can at least bullshit an answer for you.”
The young man on the other side of the lab perked up at the sound of his name. He tugged the goggles off his face and set down his soldering rod to rush over to you.
“Hi. Hi, I’m Peter,” he said, reaching his hand out to you.
“I’m [Y/N]. It’s nice to meet you, lab partner.”
He looked to be a bit younger than you and at least relatively smart, if the MIT sweatshirt peeking out from under his lab coat said anything. If your dad gave him an internship like this, you knew you shouldn’t question it. He had to be a genius.
The kid just smiled at you, continuing to shake your hand past what most would deem socially acceptable.
“Okay, enough of that,” Tony said, pushing on your joined hands to separate you two. “Mister Parker might be in and out of the lab from time to time. He joins the Avengers on the occasional recon mission for immediate repairs but since he’s on break from classes, you’ll see him more often than not. Play nice.”
When he noticed you surreptitiously looking Peter up and down, he added, “Remember, no fraternizing with coworkers.” He pointed a finger directly at you before he spun and pointed to your fellow lab mate, realizing he should warn Peter too to save face.
“All the blueprints you need for the Tin Man’s arm are in the system. We’ll have you start on that and see what you can do about minimizing the sound that thing makes. Any other questions, give Pep a call.”
“Thank you, mister Stark. I really do appreciate everything,” you said genuinely.
“Yeah, well… don’t let me down,” he replied, patting you on the shoulder on his way out. Pepper followed close behind, leaving you alone with Peter Parker.
“So Peter,” you started, sliding onto the lab chair next to where he remained standing, “tell me about yourself.”
“Uh… what do you want to know?” he asked as he shoved his hands into his coat pockets.
“How old are you?” you asked immediately.
“I’m 21.”
Only four years younger than you. So you’d probably get along just fine.
“I assume you’re at MIT?” He nodded. “What are you studying?”
“Biomolecular and mechanical engineering.” He said it so casually, you’d think he was talking about the last song he heard on the radio.
“Damn,” you responded, eyes wide. “I thought robotics and electrical engineering was wild but fuck, that sounds like hell.”
He laughed and nodded, letting a bit of the tension in his shoulders fall. “Yeah, it’s not easy. But it’s worth it.”
He shot you a small smile before gesturing back at his project. “I should probably get back to work and let you get started.”
For the rest of the day, you familiarized yourself with the Winter Soldier’s arm to figure out how to… turn the volume down? You assumed it was the gears inside causing the noise, but part of you wanted to outfit an audio jack and speaker just to fuck with your dad.
You and Peter worked in relative silence, aside from the playlist he had quietly playing through the lab sound system. When lunch rolled around, however, you finally spoke up.
“Hey Peter,” you called, his eyes flicking from the chemical beakers in front of him up to you. “First of all, what are you doing?”
“Um, it’s Spider-Man’s web fluid. Just trying to find more durable combinations.”
“Interesting.” As much as you wanted to touch the stringy substance, you knew better than to fiddle with someone else’s lab work. “Okay so second thing, in my last position, I’d just order food and have it brought to my floor but now that I’m on an exclusive floor, what do you do for lunch?”
“Oh, there are a couple security guys who have clearance to come into this floor. They just can’t get into any rooms so you’d have to meet them at the elevator. But I usually find something in the kitchen down the hall.”
“Oh, sweet. Thanks!” you said as you made your way out the door. Before you could fully exit, you turned back to see if Peter wanted you to grab anything. Once he promised he’d take his own break ‘once I get this one thing figured out,’ you continued to make your way to the kitchen.
As you drew closer to the doorway, you could hear three voices speaking over each other. They didn’t sound angry, but they were definitely arguing. You opened the door anyway and almost immediately froze in your tracks. The Falcon stood with one hand on his own head and one on the Winter Soldier’s head while Captain America rolled his eyes before those same eyes landed on you, along with the rest of the room.
“Perfect,” Sam started. “Hey new girl, between the three of us,” he said, pointing to himself, the Soldier, and the Captain, “who has the best hair?”
“First of all, my name is [Y/N]. Second,” you continued, making your way past them to the fridge you hoped your dad kept stocked with goodies, “that’s an unfair question.”
You grabbed a soda and popped it open before turning back to the three men. “Your hair suits each of you. Cap wouldn’t look good with Winter Soldier hair and Falcon wouldn’t look good with Cap’s hair.” You took a few steps closer, leaning against the island counter between you and eyeing each of them. Your eyes settled on the Winter Soldier, unashamedly flitting across his face and admiring the sharpness of his features. “You,” pointing at him, “could probably pull off either of their looks, though.”
Bucky smirked at you, but his rosy cheeks gave away a hint of embarrassment at your compliment. Steve and Sam, on the other hand, weren’t taking it quite as gracefully.
“What?!” Sam shouted. “Okay, now I know you’re lying. I could pull off Cap’s hair for sure.”
“You know, I think shaggy hair would really suit me,” Cap said, only half sarcastically.
You giggled to yourself as the three of them started talking over each other again, all dead set on their own hair being the best of them and positive they could pull off the others’ looks. While they bickered, you searched the pantry until you found a snack to at least get you through the remainder of the day.
“Alright boys, it’s been fun but I have work to do,” you said as you walked past them again. “Actually, wait. Bucky — can I call you Bucky?” He nodded even though you continued anyway. “If you could stop by lab six today, I’d love to check out your arm in person. The digital renderings aren’t quite the same.”
“Uh, okay. Sure. I’ll find you,” he said quietly.
“Sweet, thanks!” And with that, you skedaddled back to your lab.
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idkthisisjustforfanfic · 4 years ago
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that makes four.
story page | talk to me + join the tag list
PART 5
“Girls,” why don’t you finish your homework and set the table while dad and I talk for a minute?”
“Can daddy stay for dinner?” CeCe reached for his hand and looked up at you, a sweet but pleading smile on her face.
“Can’t actually, honey,” Luke informed. “I’ve got somewhere to be, so--this has to be quick, unfortunately.”
“Great,” you nodded, bitterness laced through your words. “Girls, just give us one second, okay?"
You made eye contact with Maeve, communicated a look that said please bring your sister inside. She did, she pulled her by the shoulder and offered to let her fold the napkins--her favorite part.
You shut the door one they were back in the house, turned to Luke and crossed your arms. “Why are you here?”
“To visit.”
“Okay, well, where have you been for the last six months? My dad died--you didn’t think to visit when they lost their grandfather?”
“I’ve been busy,” he whined, letting his hands slap against his legs as if you were nagging him unnecessarily. “Better late than never.”
“Not how that works, but okay.”
“Y/N--can I just come in, hang out with them for a bit?”
“You can’t just come in and out of their lives, Luke, whenever it’s convenient. You either show up with some consistency or you don’t show up at all.”
“So you’d rather them not have a relationship with their father than have one that’s maybe not up to your standards?”
You were back in your marriage, suddenly, back to the fights and the frustration that became a dance you knew all too well. “They’re kids, Luke! Their parents got divorced and then their grandpa died and we moved and now you’re just here on my doorstep. Where’s your girlfriend, anyway?”
You looked past his shoulder--his car was parked on the gravel, apparently he remembered the entry code for the gate. The blonde woman who dangled from his arm on Facebook and the motorcycle he rode were nowhere to be found.
“She’s at home. And she would love to meet the girls, you know.”
“I don’t think so.”
“You don’t think so?”
“You can’t just show up with no notice and take them to meet some random woman you’re sleeping with.”
“Well, do we have to get lawyers involved in this, then? I’m pretty sure I deserve some level of custody over my own children.”
“Now you want custody? I mean--you literally didn’t reply to my calls about settling that in court when we actually got divorced so forgive me for thinking that meant you didn’t care.”
“I want to be able to see my kids, Y/N.”
“Okay--well maybe you can call me in the morning and we can schedule something instead of you showing up at my house.” You turned around to grab the doorknob, but before your hand landed on it, the door pulled open and Harry was stood on the other side with intrigue in his eyes.
“Harry--” you were about to tell him to go inside and stay out of it, but he stuck his hand out in Luke’s direction and smiled.
“Luke--nice to put a face to the name.”
Luke shook his hand but narrowed his eyes. “Do I know you?”
“No, you don’t. My name’s Harry.”
“You look familiar--” Luke mumbled this to no one in particular, but his eyes caught yours when you offered him a small smile.
“He’s a client of Jeff’s--he’s a musician.”
Luke made a face at that. “Okay--why are you here?”
“I live here,” Harry said. “With your children and ex-wife.”
“Harry,” you said his name again in warning. He didn’t even look at you, kept his eyes trained on Luke’s as if this was some sort of show down.
Luke nodded slowly, brought his eyes to you. “So our children can’t meet my girlfriend but they can live with a stranger.”
“He’s not a stranger, Luke. He’s known Jeff and the Azoffs for years--he knew my dad.”
“You didn’t think to ask me if that was okay?”
“You never returned my texts about my dead father or asking if you wanted to see them, so, it didn’t really cross my mind.”
Harry took a step in front of you. “Why are you here, man? I think that’s a better question.”
“I could do without the attitude, dude, okay? I can come to see my children if I want.”
“Just curious, since we’re about to eat dinner and I know Maeve’s not done with her homework.”
You rolled your eyes at that--an obvious flex that Harry was more in the know about your kids than he was. Your heart beat was rising, eyes flickering between the two of them.
“I didn’t know I needed your permission to see my own kids.”
“You don’t need mine, but maybe actually co-parenting with Y/N would be a good place to start.”
“Oh so she’s got you playing by all her rules, too?”
“Luke--”
“If you want to call her rules stability, for your children, then sure.”
“So you think you can move in here and just take over as father or something, is that what’s happening? Is there something going on--”
“No--I’m not their father, but I know that Y/N is an incredible mother--”
“Harry, please.”
“So you’re sleeping with this guy and he moves in and that’s fine but they can’t meet my girlfriend.”
“No one said we’re sleeping together, Luke,” you made a face at that, crossed your arms over your chest again and watched him with narrowed eyes.
“Are you?” He looked between the two of you, waiting for an answer like he suddenly had a right to know that information.
Harry shrugged his shoulders. “S’none of your business.”
He rolled his eyes. “Well, good luck with her, maybe one day she’ll divorce you and then tell you that you can’t see your own kids--didn't know I married such a control freak.”
Harry swung before you could even process the insult, his fist collided with Luke’s face and you let out a gasp. “Harry--are you fucking insane?!”
You rushed over to Luke, now clutching his face on the ground as he swore to himself. “Fucking fuck, that’s a perfectly clear answer, dude--good to know you’re sleeping with her.”
The door had already pulled open again, both Maeve and CeCe looked out into the evening air with wide eyes, uncertainty on their faces when Harry turned around to see them. “Go inside,” he said.
“Why?” Maeve shot this back with a prickly attitude. “What’s happening? Why is dad on the ground?”
“Just go inside,” Harry said it again, his words more stern.
“You’re not my dad, Harry, you can’t tell me what to do!”
Now was not the time for Maeve’s theatrics.
Luke shot back to his feet and lunged towards Harry, words interspersed between grunts when his own fist grazed the side of Harry’s jaw. “Don’t tell my kids what to do!”
Maeve pulled CeCe inside and shut the door quickly, some kind of instinct taking over her when you yanked at the back of Luke’s shirt. “Luke, get the fuck off of him!”
Harry shoved him back, he lost his footing and fell to the ground again but was quick to get up and brush the dirt off of his hands. You stood in front of Harry, who now rubbed at his jaw and looked more dejected than before, green eyes more somber when you shook your head.
“Both of you need to grow the fuck up--you just tried to beat each other up in front of the girls.”
Harry dropped your gaze and moved his jaw in circles, Luke glared with resentment, but they were both quiet.
“Go, Luke--you can’t show up and pull this shit, okay? We’re not doing it like this.”
“So now I don’t get to see my kids because your fucking boyfriend punched me in the face?”
“I didn’t say that!” You shouted, your volume making both of them flinch. “I never said you can’t see them but you certainly can’t just show up and expect me to take that well. We’re not talking about it now, so please, do everyone a favor and get the fuck out.”
He thought about it for a second, reached up to touch his cheek--already swollen and bruised--before he let out a sigh and looked at Harry. “Fuck you, man.”
“Fuck you too,” Harry said quickly.
“Go inside,” you said to Harry, a hand on his chest. “And ice that.”
Luke scoffed at your attempt to aid him, but when you turned to see him, he shrunk under your gaze.
“Get out!”
He turned and mumbled, “my lawyer will be in touch.”
“Mine looks forward to that call,” you said sweetly. He climbed into his car and pulled the door shut, Harry stood behind you, feet glued to the front step until Luke’s car pulled out onto the road.
When he was gone, you turned around. He hadn’t budged, he waited for you to say something, but you pulled your phone out and dialed Jeff’s number before you even addressed him.
He picked up on the second ring. “Hi--can you please come get the girls and take them out for dinner or something? Luke just showed up at my house and Harry punched him in the face and then Maeve and CeCe saw Luke try to punch Harry. So--I’m going to need some help. Immediately."
You could hear him grab his keys, he was in his car before he hung up and when you ended the call, the door had been pulled open again.
Maeve stepped out but closed it behind her. “I turned the stove off and CeCe’s watching TV. But I’m not going to lie, she’s suspicious.”
You let out a sigh that turned into a laugh, brought a hand up to your face. You didn’t know if you were mad or sad or amused or terrified. A mix of emotions when she looked up to Harry.
“Did you punch my dad in the face?”
He looked to you, eyes wide as if he needed your help to get out of this one.
You shrugged, not going to save your ass.
“I lost my temper and that was not okay,” he said.
“But then my dad punched you.”
More hesitance, but he nodded. “Right.”
They both looked to you. Quiet for a moment--was Maeve’s childhood shattered here in front of the house, broken atop the gravel that crunched under Luke’s tires when he drove away?
Hopefully not. Hopefully this wasn’t the moment she’d recount in adulthood, a therapist’s office somewhere on the East Coast, my mom let a pop star move in and then he punched my dad in the face.
“Uncle Jeff is coming and is going to take you and your sister out for dinner.” You didn’t know what else to tell her.
“Okay,” she accepted this, something told you she knew that this was serious and this was not something to ask a thousand questions about. “Can I say something?”
“Sure.”
“I think dad’s probably jealous because it’s obvious you guys like like each other.”
You watched her for a second, unable to piece together a rebuttal. So instead of replying, you told her to get her shoes on, tugged Harry inside and sat him at the island.
A bag of frozen peas was pressed to his jaw when Jeff showed up. Maeve and CeCe were in the living room with the TV on, both of them sat on the couch under a thick layer of tension.
“What the fuck happened?” Jeff asked quietly, car still running outside.
“You’ll have to ask your friend,” you said, scooping the uneaten dinner you’d made into Tupperware. “But maybe you can ask him later so I can yell at him first.”
Jeff smiled in your direction, approving of your reply. He looked to Harry, “don’t be an asshole.” He walked over to the living room without a word from Harry and greeted the girls.
“Be good,” you told them. They were quiet, waved goodbye and faded into the driveway once Jeff shut the door.
Silence, except for the crunching from the frozen peas when Harry shifted the bag against his jaw and tried not to wince in pain. He looked at you, guilt creased in his forehead.
“Do you have anything to say for yourself?”
He sighed, dropped your gaze. “I’m sorry I punched your ex-husband in the face.”
“How about the fact that you came out there and got involved in the first place?”
This got him riled up. “Well I didn’t know what to do, Y/N! Maeve said you were talking to him and I wasn’t about to leave you alone with him.”
“I was married to him for 10 years. I know how to be alone with the guy.”
“I shouldn’t have punched him,” he admitted quickly.
“You shouldn’t have.”
He stood from the stool and set the peas down. “But I hated what he said about you--acting like you’re the bad guy here. You’re not.”
“I know I’m not, I didn’t need you to defend me!”
A step closer to you. “I wanted to.”
“Why?”
He shrugged his shoulders, looked away for a second like he couldn’t say it. What was he supposed to say? I like you? I have feelings for you? Did he? You were just as confused as he looked.
“Because I feel like we’re a family, in a weird way, the four of us.”
Just as it always had, the word anchored itself beneath your ribs, made it hard to breathe when you tried to define it in your head.
A family? People related by blood. People who live together. People who love each other. You didn’t have the time or the patience to define it right now with him still looking at you like your silence hurt his feelings.
Maybe it got under your skin and maybe it warmed your heart at the same time. It was at least enough reassurance that you weren’t crazy, and you weren’t imagining all of this. Maybe he did have feelings for you in some way, maybe he did belong here somehow.
“I can’t believe all of that happened,” you said this seriously, but when you looked up at him again you couldn’t help but laugh. How idiotic--your ex husband and your ex-boyband house guest duked it out on the front lawn. Tristan was right, your life had suddenly become a trashy romance novel and that realization brought humor to an otherwise horrendous evening.
“What?” His lips tugged into a smirk.
“Am I going to get blacklisted for causing an injury to your perfect face? Is Jeff going to murder me when he brings the girls home?”
He rolled his eyes at your joke but smiled. “I’m the idiot that thought it was a good idea to punch the ex-husband of my--”
Your breath hitched in your throat, you let out a sigh when he shrugged and offered a verbal pivot. “It was stupid--you didn’t cause it.”
There was still an awkward amount of space between you. He’d stood up like he wanted to move closer to you instinctually, comfort you or touch you. But now you twisted a ring on your finger and didn’t know what to say.
“I’ll apologize to the girls, tell them it was wrong of me and talk to them about it.”
You nodded, was that appropriate? Should you be the one to discuss this with them? Where did you even start in regard to addressing Maeve’s comment at the front door?
“I think maybe I should talk to them.”
“Yeah, okay.”
“Maybe I should clear it up with Maeve too, you know, just what she said about us.”
“Right--what are you going to say?”
“I don’t know,” you admitted.
He took a step closer to you. “You could tell her that she’s right.”
You looked up at him, eyes on his for a second like the world had been paused. You’d been speechless before. Maybe not often, and maybe not for reasons like this, but when you didn’t say anything, he took a step back.
“Sorry--you’re right. Best to not involve them.”
Your voice came out in a squeak, insecure and lacking the confidence you’d tried so hard to build. “You think?”
“Yeah, I mean, that’s what you were going to say, right?”
Was it?
“Yeah.”
He scratched at the back of his neck, slid the peas forward on the counter. “Thanks for these. I should probably shower.”
“Okay.”
A hesitance in him, you could see it. He took a step towards the stairs but kept his hand on the counter, a quick glance over his shoulder. “Are we alright?”
“Yeah, yes.”
“You sure?”
You nodded, offering him a small smile. “Certain. Goodnight, Harry.”
**
Jeff wasn’t mad at you about Harry’s face. If anything, he was mad at Luke for being an asshole and mad at Harry for being stupid enough to get involved. You didn’t dare tell him about the things he’d said in the kitchen when you were home alone.
Harry’s ego was bruised almost as bad as his jaw, which seemed to turn a darker shade of blue-ish yellow the next day.
Maeve was sat at the dining room table, eyes fluttered in annoyance when CeCe climbed into her seat and then looked at you. “Sorry,” she said. “I had to go pee.”
“That’s okay,” you nodded, letting out a sigh when you looked between them. “So, I called a family meeting because I wanted to talk about what happened the other day when dad was here.”
“When is he visiting again?” CeCe smiled, distracted by the mention of her absent parent.
“Not for a while,” Maeve answered with an eye roll. “He punched Harry.”
“They punched each other,” CeCe corrected with an attitude.
“Exactly, which is the problem, because as you both know we don’t use our hands to communicate in this house. We use words.”
“Well why didn’t Harry use words to tell dad that he likes you?”
“That’s not what was happening, Maeve.”
Was it wrong to lie to her? She rolled her eyes like she didn’t believe you, like your words were just a cover up for whatever was really happening--you bit your lip when you realized that they were.
“Then why did they fight?”
“Because,” you said, exerting your mom-power. “They disagreed about something. Just like you two disagree sometimes.”
“We’re eleven and six,” Maeve made a face at you. “It’s age-appropriate for CeCe to pull my hair.”
You stared at her blankly--she was too smart for her own good. “But it’s wrong, any type of violence is wrong.”
“So is daddy coming to visit again or no?” CeCe was probably having trouble keeping up, she looked confused but invested when you smiled at her.
“Maybe--him and I still need to talk about that.”
“He never comes to see us!” Maeve complained, frustration in her voice when the front door opened. Harry--hair pushed back with a headband, curls escaped on the side and a dewy layer of sweat on his forehead--apparently he’d gone for a run.
The bruise on his jaw was visible. “Hi,” he looked around, solemn. “Sorry to interrupt.”
“You said dad was going to visit us still when we moved here but he hasn’t!”
You turned back to Maeve, parenting duties outweighed your desire to take in the sight of Harry post-workout.
“I can’t control your father,” you reminded her. “We’ve talked about this--he loves you, but he…” you felt awkward saying it in front of Harry, a watered down version of the truth. “He’s not good at managing his time. He forgets things and he gets distracted. But he loves you.”
“Then why doesn’t he come visit?” Maeve asked, arms crossed over chest. She wore a purple shirt, one that you’d gotten at the Gap and that she used to say she hated, probably just because you said it looked nice on her.
Her voice was softer now, less angry and more confused, a tinge of sadness when Harry walked to the kitchen for a glass of water. Another thing he probably hadn’t planned on: witnessing uncomfortable family meetings where you tried to explain to your children why their father doesn’t keep in touch.
It was a fair question, you couldn’t blame her for asking and wondering. Why didn’t he reach out more? Why didn’t he make an effort to see them?
You couldn’t admit your own confusion to them. “He’s just busy, honey. He loves you both a lot, I know that. But I can talk to him and see if we can schedule a time for him to come see you.”
Harry paused at that--far away in the kitchen, glass to his lips when he stopped sipping and looked in your direction. When he noticed he’d been caught, he cleared his throat and headed out to the patio.
CeCe looked up at you with big eyes. “Can daddy come for my ballet recital?”
“Maybe,” you nodded. “I can ask him.”
That seemed to be good enough for them. Maeve was eager to head out to a friend’s house when her ride showed up and CeCe was more than happy to play in the backyard by herself.
Harry was stood on the patio still when CeCe ran to the swing set, glass of water still in his hand as if he hadn’t a clue what was going on. His eyebrows raised when you stood in the doorway.
“Hi.”
“Hi,” he turned to see you, hand on his hip. “Sorry--I didn’t mean to burst in there.”
“It’s fine, I think they get it. I mean, I don’t know, as much as they can, I guess.”
He nodded, stared at the ground when he spoke. “You know, I was thinking on my run--if this is too much I can talk to Jeff about staying at his. I don’t want to make--”
“No,” you shook your head, probably too quickly. Surprised by your own reply, you crossed your arms. “I mean, it’s fine. I just think maybe we should take a minute to figure out--”
“Right,” he nodded, cutting your sentence down to a half-formed thought. “Understood.”
He looked away at that, glanced down to his running shoes before he kicked at the patio slate beneath them.
You bit at the inside of your cheek, cursed yourself for how stupid you’d been. This is why you shouldn’t have let your guard down in the first place. First Luke, then your dad, now this type of stress all under one roof was possibly too much for everyone involved. The last 12 months had already snowballed into a mess of emotions and you should have known better.
As the adult in the equation, you were sure that this was all your fault.
And yet you wished it wasn’t--something in you wanted to walk over to him, wrap your arms around his middle and feel comforted by his touch. He brought his eyes to you and was about to speak when the alarm beeped. The front door opened, Tristan appeared through the glass doors and waved when CeCe ran over to see who the visitor was. Conversation effectively over.
“Hi,” he greeted with a smile, completely unaware that he’d just walked in at the worst time. “Glad I caught you both here. Sorry to barge in but I wanted to confirm details about the launch party so we can get it squared away.”
Harry stood awkwardly still, weight shifting on his feet when Tristan pulled out his phone to decline a call but kept talking. “I talked to Helen and Kira, the restaurant’s booked and the headcount is confirmed so we’re pretty much good to go.”
Right, the body wash debut and the celebratory dinner that Tristan had insisted on having. It was more than just the body wash debut: a celebration of how much Luna Skincare had grown, the launch of a whole new product line, a pick me up to try to make you feel less stressed, as Tristan had said.
Harry was confused, Tristan looked between the two of you. “Oh--did you...not tell him?”
“Tell me what?”
“About the dinner, the party we’re having,” Tristan shrugged and watched you, confused as to why you hadn’t looped Harry in.
It wasn’t purposeful. You’d spent countless showers contemplating if and how to invite him. Was he your date? Was he just a friend who was coming? Would he sit beside you or beside Jeff or was it better to leave him out of it altogether to avoid the questions and overthinking that had already saturated your brain before the event?
Harry shook his head. “I don’t know about it.”
Great, now you looked like an asshole. You laughed awkwardly to try and brush it off. “Well, we were still planning, I was going to invite you, of course. It’s for the body wash debut.”
He nodded, having gathered that much already.
You cleared your throat, the invitation a clear backtrack. “You should come, it’s just a dinner at La Cava. The team that worked on it, Jeff is coming, Zoey, some of our friends.”
He hesitated, glanced over to Tristan like he didn’t know how to reply but then looked back to you. “I thought we just said we--”
“It’s fine,” now you cut him off, a wave of your hand when you turned back to Tristan. “It’s gonna be great--do we have to finalize a menu?”
“I’ll have it on your desk by Tuesday morning.”
“Great, do you want to stay for dinner?”
He looked between the two of you, somehow aware of the tension that hovered above your backyard. “Can’t,” he said slowly. “I have a date, actually.”
“Oh, okay. Who’s the guy?”
“Someone I met online,” he shrugged. “Check my location and if I’m not home by midnight, please call the police.”
You laughed, “will do.”
He kissed you on the cheek and then waved to CeCe when she screamed BYE TRISTY!!!
Harry said something about taking a shower and seeing a friend that night, he dipped out the backdoor before dinner and you had no clue what time he got home. But that was for the best, right? You needed to take a step back to get your feet back on the ground.
You didn’t need to concern yourself with where he was or what he was doing--and the tiny voice of anxiety in the back of your brain reminded you that you definitely didn’t need to know who he was with.
Doing so had only made your emotions more jumbled. You’d been stupid enough to think there was something here, think that all of this meant something. And maybe it did, in moments. Harry had been the one to say that Maeve was right, but where did that sentence end? Maeve was right and: I have to go on tour, I’m too young to be a step father, I’m not looking for a serious relationship, I’m too busy for all of this.
The sentence likely ended with a fiery crash into flames and embarrassment.
Whatever was going on between the two of you--between the four of you, even--was a momentary blip on the radar of life. An extra set of hands when you needed them, someone to help things settle back into place after your life had been shaken up like the contents of a snow globe.
But somehow, eventually, things had to settle. You were only upset that it had been rattled again, by fists and bruises and angry words, before you were finally able to see that it was time for things to calm down.
He knew this too. He pulled back over the next week, spent less time downstairs and when you found yourself in the kitchen with him one night after the girls were asleep, a general sense of unease seemed to blanket the room.
Your phone dinged on the counter in front of him when he forked into a bowl of leftovers.
“Oh, you--uh--it’s a message from Luke.”
You were bent over at the dishwasher, the final plate tucked inside when you stood up, a wrinkle in your forehead at his words.
“Luke?”
He slid it over, took another bite and pretended to be disinterested.
Luke (9:24pm): Been thinking about it. Once every two months would be great. Don’t want to get lawyers involved--call me next week and we can talk about when to schedule something. Sorry about punching your friend.
You let out a breath you hadn’t meant to hold, licked at your lips when your eyes welled with tears. You looked up at Harry--who’d apparently been watching you. “Sorry, I’m fine, I just--”
“What did he say?”
“He said he’s fine to only see the girls every two months and we can talk about scheduling. And he apologized for punching you.”
Harry let out a sigh at that, his shoulders slumped like they’d been tense. “I mean--I think I did more damage to him, but, s’fine.” He brought his eyes up to meet yours and smiled a bit. “But that’s good--if he wants to see them there should be some type of predictability to it.”
“Right,” you agreed, a beat of silence. “I should probably feel bad for the girls that their father only wants to see them six times a year but I’m honestly just relieved at this point.”
He held back a quiet laugh. “I don’t blame you. Don’t need any more fist fights.”
You looked up at him, bit back a smirk and tugged at the necklace around your neck. “Definitely not.” Another beat of silence when he looked down at the countertop, his lips were parted like he wanted to speak, but then he sighed again.
The sadness on his face tugged at your heart, you spit out words if only to fill the air between you.
“I’m also sorry that he punched you. You shouldn’t have punched him first, obviously, but, he’s an idiot. The father of my children, but an idiot nonetheless.”
“I shouldn’t have gotten involved. I overstepped, so, I’m the one that owes you an apology.”
You nodded. He wasn’t wrong. He did owe you an apology despite the fact that he’d already said it that night. But you didn’t want it to feel as awkward and uncomfortable as it had been for the last few days.
Maybe the girls didn’t sense it, Harry was still teaching Maeve guitar and he still chased CeCe around the backyard, tossing her over his shoulder when he finally caught up. But instead of sneaking into your room at night he shut his bedroom door quietly and you pretended you didn’t watch to see when he finally turned the light out.
“By the way, my house is coming along. They said I can move in sometime in the next two weeks probably.” He nodded like this was a business meeting, neat and tidy information that he presented on top of the island like there wasn’t any weight to his words.
“Oh, okay.”
“Yeah--so, I’ll keep you updated, I guess.”
In a year of uncertainty and with a thousand twists and turns, something about Harry made you feel like your path was straight, like no unexpected bumps or roadblocks could throw you off course. Somehow, he’d simultaneously been the one to make things fall into place and stir up emotions inside of you that you forgot existed.
But the mere thought of that brought on so much judgment and self-doubt. You'd been desperate and pathetic and searching for anything that would keep you upright, then Harry showed up with a suitcase and a heart of gold.
It wasn’t his fault that you fell for him. There was no one to blame but you.
He saw the look on your face, one of swirling thoughts and anxiety. He cleared his throat. “Do you want a glass of wine?”
You looked up at him sheepishly, like you’d been caught in your own internal monologue of a shame spiral. “Do you want a glass of wine?”
He laughed, reached for glasses above the stove and poured.
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AN: this one was a bit shorter--but don't worry, everything happens for a reason.
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coexiising · 3 years ago
Text
Good Neighbors - Chapter Two
SUMMARY ✦ Your parents host a dinner party for the new neighbors. 
WARNING(S) ✦ Nothing
MASTERLIST ✦ Here. 
It had been three days since your last encounter with Anakin Skywalker. Three days since you could’ve sworn he winked at you. Not that you were counting . . . No, you were most definitely not doing that.
Since then you had been doing, well, essentially nothing but thinking back to that moment of the two of you talking. And it was probably stupid, since it was just two neighbors talking to each other. He was just being nice to you and that was all, there was nothing to think more of. There were way better things to keep your mind on, like going to your part time job and focusing on finishing up your classes to get your degree. You were busy, but that didn’t stop you from stopping whatever you were doing and glancing through your window to see if you could catch a glimpse at your new neighbor.
You blamed it on stupid infatuation. He was incredibly attractive and you were bored, and you weren’t the only one to think so, since your mother the other day said something about inviting your new ‘attractive neighbors’ to dinner one night. You hated how quick you were to say it was a good idea.
One thing that you learned was that your window was right across from your neighbor's master bedroom, which meant that when the curtains were drawn back, you could see right into their room. Which really wasn’t often, since it was only a side window and they had a much bigger window in the front of the house that was open way more often. But sometimes, if you looked at the right time, you could see Anakin or his wife walking around or talking with one another.
You wondered what she was like. She was very beautiful, with coffee brown hair that stayed in natural curls. She also had a good sense of style, always looking classy and elegant that made you feel out of place every time you and her were outside at the same time for whatever reason. It was wrong to be comparing yourself to her, you shouldn’t, and again blamed it on some stupid fantasy you had made up in your head. It was childish, sure, but it wasn’t like anything was ever going to happen.
You could hear him now, downstairs in the open hallway leading to your kitchen and dining room, talking to your mother about something you couldn’t quite make out. It was later in the evening, almost seven, and your family decided to give the courtesy of inviting the Skywalkers to dinner tonight, something you had been looking forward to since your mother informed you a day prior. Splaying your hands on the front of your black dress, you made sure that there were no creases, looking in the mirror to do one final once over of your appearance. You looked nice, maybe nicer than your family were going for, but no one would comment on it anyways. There was a golden necklace around your neck that had been given to you for your birthday a few years ago, which accented right off of your chest. Once you were satisfied, you opened the door to your room and walked down the steps, getting closer to the voices of your parents and your guests.
The second you got to the ground level of your home and saw the backs of both Anakin Skywalker and Padmé Amidala, you made a beeline for the other direction, deciding to make a detour to the kitchen, stumbling over your feet. You didn’t see all of him, but you could see that Anakin was wearing a dark navy blue dress shirt and those black pants that he was always in, the ones that you always ended up looking at for more than the normal amount of time. Pressing your palms into the countertop, you took deep breaths, trying to compose yourself. This shouldn’t be so hard, you were making a big deal out of this . . . Right? You once again had to repeat to yourself that he was married and there was no way that anything could happen, even though deep down you wished that something would.
“There you are, why didn’t you come down earlier?” Your mother asked, walking into the room and heading for the oven, the smell of something cooking taking over your senses and taking you away from your thoughts. “Anakin was asking about you.”
You almost choked on the air you breathed in. “He was asking about me?” Your tone was a little too questionable and she turned to look at you behind her shoulder, her eyebrow raised and a tiny smile on her face. “I mean, why was he asking about me?” You asked, attempting to save yourself.
“I don’t know, something about a ball and his kids, did they almost hit you or something?”
Oh, right. The incident at the barbeque. Of course that’s why he was asking, that’s probably the only time he had thought about you.
“So, anyways, go out there and be a charmer. Your brother is terrible at it and you know your father is probably boring them with business stuff,” She said, going back to the meal she was preparing. You nodded, deciding it was finally time to face them and get your own awkwardness out of the way.  The walk to the dining room was brisk and you saw that your father was, in fact, talking about something business related. Padmé seemed somewhat interested, but Anakin was definitely not listening by the way he stared down at the table. You almost laughed, before realizing that your father was talking to you now and you had no idea what he was saying. You were too busy looking at Anakin, seeing his blue eyes dart to your own the moment you walked in the room.
You faltered for a moment. “What’d you say?” You glanced at your dad.
“I was just saying that you finally joined us!” He said, giving you one of his kind dad smiles. You flashed one back, meekly sitting in the only seat that was open at the table, conveniently right next to the person you were trying to keep your distance from. As you pulled your seat out and sat down next to Anakin, your father started talking to Padmé again. You were glad that the attention had seemingly been taken off of you and you could try to keep yourself together for the rest of this dinner.
Though that didn’t seem to be in your favor.
“Luke wanted me to tell you that he was sorry about kicking that ball again, he seems to be really broken up about it, not sure why,” Anakin said to you, turning his head to look right at you again.
You laughed, looking down at your hands in your lap and shrugged your shoulders. “I don’t know, you may be hearing from my lawyers soon,” You joked, facing him and seeing a grin on his face. “But you’re one, right? So you should be good.”
“I’m not sure, you have a good case,” He joked, taking a sip of his wine. “I haven’t seen you around in a while, still picking up shifts for your friend?” He remembered.
You nodded. “Yeah, but I’m all done now. We get off for the Fourth tomorrow anyways.” The summer holiday had come quickly this year, but it was still something to look forward to. You loved all the fireworks and the food that came with the celebration. In addition to that, it was your family’s favorite holiday as well, meaning that everyone would go out to celebrate like you always did with the traditional block party that the Skywalker’s would now be invited to. It was as if Anakin would never get out of your life no matter how much you wished to avoid him.
Perhaps it was silly, this whole idea that you could have some type of romance with him. He was married, and it seemed like they were happy together. They had two beautiful children together, nothing could ever change that fact.
“That’s good, your mother was telling us all a while ago about the party. You guys sure love to throw them,” Anakin teased, taking a sip of his glass of wine. You watched his lips meet the glass, noting how pink they looked in the correct light. It took you a moment to compose yourself, looking down at the table and taking the biggest breath you could take without him noticing.
You gave a nod, opening your mouth to say something but being greeted by your mother walking in the room with different pots in hand. Finally, a good distraction that could get your mind off of the hunk of the man beside you. Padmé said something about the food that you couldn’t quite make out, reaching to grab one of the serving spoons while you grabbed for the other. Right as your hand hit the wood handle, Anakin’s own hand came down on yours, him not knowing that you were going to reach for the same one.
“Sorry,” You said, hoping that he would mistake your blush from the contact for embarrassment. Luckily, he only gave you a glance and pulled his hand away.
“You first.”
You took some of the food onto your plate, looking down at it until you were sure that the blush had diminished. The room was so hot at this point that you thought that it was possibly on fire. But it wasn’t, it was all because of how close you were to your neighbor, so close that you could feel his presence right next to you and you could smell the cologne that you had smelled the first day that you met him, bringing you back to the moment you looked into his eyes for the first time. You were sure that if you thought about him any more that you would combust right then and there. So you focused on eating, staying silent while the others made small talk.
Minutes passed by and you felt somewhat comfortable again, reaching beside you to grab your phone to check it under the table. Messages blinked up at you, almost illuminating your face as you read: Y/N! Please pick up. I left my computer at work and my brother has my car. I need it tomorrow so that I can work on my thesis, please, please, please can you get it? It was your best friend. Your heart practically thumped out of your chest at the opportunity to get out of this whole ordeal, where you could take your time to get the computer as long as the Skywalker’s would stay over. And then you would have an excuse for your mom instead of just sneaking off to your room.
“Mom, it’s Julia,” You said, holding up your phone so that she could read the text. “I’m sorry, I really need to stop by work and get her computer. It’s important.” You knew that she wouldn’t be happy about you leaving, but nonetheless she said you could go and you were already halfway out the door when you heard your father shouting your name.
Turning around, you saw that he was standing up with Anakin, a firm hand on your neighbor’s shoulder. “Anakin has offered to drive you. It’s late, you know how bad those roads get at night and I would feel more comfortable if you went with him,” Your dad said. You didn’t really have much room to object, since Anakin was already walking into the entrance area and putting on his coat, a black one that matched the same ‘put together’ style that he always seemed to have.
“Okay,” You said, feeling your nerves turn you almost inside out.
“We’ll be back as soon as we can,” Anakin said to everyone, walking behind you out the door and closing it.
You walked to the car alone with Anakin, basically jumping out of your seat in joy the moment you sat down.
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unikron-kitten-kat · 2 years ago
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Here is another OC of mine!
She is a variant though! She is Demon!Alex. She is a Variant of Alex, who I will make a post on later, who happened to have Demon parents. Er, at least sorta. Her Mom is a Demon-Halfling, and her Dad is the child of a Demon-Halfling and a Human.
Loving this style! Might try and draw my other more Main OCs in this style!
Btw, for anyone wondering, the text in the top right says "Well, mark me down as scared AND horny-"
Some info!
Demon!Alex always thought she was just aroace. And then she met her now boss; the one and only, the myth, the legend, Slenderman. He was just... So eye-catching. His appearance caught her off guard to be honest. In all the stories told, she would have expected him to be some sorta goofy tree-ent fea beast or something, not a sexy Eldritch Demi-God.
She was among the first Proxies Slenderman 'adopted', but she didn't really see him as a father figure as most the other Proxies did. Unlike most, she actually had a decent childhood, with loving parents, who are still alive btw. She was just... Influenced by the wrong people.. And due to the fact she opened her eyes to the kind of people they were a little too late, she lost her immediate trust of anybody she came across.
Slenderman was just lucky he found 'half-dead' and unconscious. She begrudgingly follows his orders. You could say she is a really big trouble-maker, and Slenderman finds her to be more difficult than Jeff and the Quartet: Jeff himself, Toby, BEN, and Eyeless. She just.. Really hates authority due to past experiences.. Either that or she really enjoys seeing him angry.. Nobody knows which one.
Alex uses She/Her, is a cis female. Probably straight. She is 5'7", and is a Demon-Halfling. Human Halfling to be more specific. She can control some form of flame known as the Green variant of Demon Phyr, which is lower on the scale of power, but still strong enough to ward off even Slenderman. Her wings are normally small, for convenience, but they can grow to be gigantic. Her tail too. Her Demon Half is of the specie Could Jumpers. Their wings are typically massive, with large tails to steer and jerk to make fast u-turns. Her horns were severed and couldn't grow back. Only one side of her head grew horns.
When Alex gets flustered, her eyes widen, pupils fluctuate between large and small. Her body goes rigid, her wings spike outward, her tail coils, her already melty halo drips even more.. She shakes a bit too. Probably from how tense her body just became..
She essentially made 'Operator merch' for her and the other proxies to wear. The telling detail being Slenderman's mark being on the clothing in any form: a patch, a print, anything.
She acts all stoic, and is all bark and bite, until Slenderman steps into the picture. Sure others would only notice she stops yelling and whatnot, her exterior not changing much, with that Death GlareTM being a permanent expression of her face. But when everyone else leaves is pretty much when her tail goes between her legs. Honestly, she is conflicted with her body parts. Sure, being a Demon-Halfling is cool and all, but not when your Eldritch Boss can physically see how powerless you are against him.. But it is hot tho-
KINKS BELOW, LOL
If she had the balls, would probably audibly ask Slenderman to step on her, or choke her. Due to how her body registers pain, she developed a sort of pain kink, so is a machosist. Would probably drop the entire bold-face act and become a submissive lil pet if Slenderman put a collar on her. She is touch starved ngl. Been living away from her parents for a long while(still keeps in touch tho), and hasn't been in any relationships due to her immense trust issues. Probably has both a praise and a humiliation kink. Literally into BDSM. Slenderman could literally bully her while she is restrained and she would LOVE it.
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yeoandmoon · 3 years ago
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you are now listening to graceland too by phoebe bridgers! ( yeosang x f!reader )
fluff, burnout!yeosang, bassist!yeosang, writer!reader, childhood friends 2 lovers but also idiots 2 lovers, yeosang and reader run away, seongjoong are engaged, wooyoung + yeonjun have a band, there is only one bed, yeosang has a nose ring, it’s implied reader has a bad relationship with her mother, wc is 3.1k
NOTE: happy yeosang day! this was a doozy to write, but i hope you all enjoy it! its based off one of my favourite phoebe bridgers songs! :)
There’s a mural on the wall of the hotel lobby. It’s a warm toned painting of a forest, with a hint of a bright blue sky peeking out from the top of the trees. There’s a moose standing at the forefront of the mural, and a little fox sleeping on a rock towards the bottom, surrounded by colourful flowers and leaves.
The mural confused you, if you were being honest. The hotel you worked the night audit at was situated in the busy downtown centre of the city you lived in, and there were barely any forests for miles around the city - let alone any wildlife, like moose or foxes. Hongjoong said it was to make guests feel more ‘in touch with nature’ and to help people forget about the ‘problems of the real world’, while Yeosang claimed it was ‘just another scam in the tourist trap’.
You, on the other hand, was sure the mural was put there to torture you. You would spend nights having staring contests with the moose (which, to your surprise, you always lost), or you would spend hours on Google with Hongjoong trying to find out what species of fox the sleeping fox was (you were sure it was a cape fox, while Hongjoong swore up and down that it was a gray fox). The blue sky between the trees teased you; a reminder that most of your days were spent in the library at your university, or in this dimly lit lobby.
Sometimes, it felt like the only time you saw the sunshine was when you were with Yeosang.
Despite the occasional burnout and the lack of seeing sun most days, you didn’t mind the job. You were always more of a night person, and your classes were always later in the day so you did manage to pull in some sleep. Due to the late hours, you usually only dealt with customers in the first hour or two of your shift, and most of that was just directing confused Ubereats delivery people and pretty Tinder dates to hallways and rooms. It was the perfect job to work on your writing, and get your school work out of the way without listening to your mother cry about how you’re throwing your life away like your sister.
Plus, you could think of a hundred worse people to spend the night shift with than the nighttime valet, Hongjoong. Hongjoong often kept you occupied with his latest reforms and art projects, and stories about his fiancee, Seonghwa & their friend, Yunho (who he kept insisting you needed to go on a date with).
“Your emo boy is coming.”
Well, you could think of ninety-nine worse people to spend the night shift with than Hongjoong, who sat next to you at the check-in desk.
You scoff, “He’s not my emo boy.” You mumble, glancing at the street entrance to see Yeosang walk in with an ice coffee on hand.
Despite your words, Kang Yeosang was your person (you wouldn’t quite use the term ‘emo boy’, even if it did fit), and he had been since your family moved in next door to his family when you two were children. Although your friendship lately had been reduced to these late night meetings while you two were on break on your respective graveyard shifts (you at the hotel and Yeosang at the convenience store down the block, of course) and occasional meetings in the garden when you were both running errands for your families, you still considered Yeosang one of your dearest memories.
It was hard not too, you suppose. He had been there for many of your firsts, and was always cheering you on. Yeosang always made you feel powerful and important - like a powerful heroine, and not his bratty next door neighbor who cried on his doorstep after being dumped by her first year partner. He always made you feel wanted.
Yeosang grinned at you as he stepped into the lobby (if your heart fluttered in your chest, you ignored it). He had on a backwards dad cap, and he had recently changed his nose ring out for the gold hoop San had bought him for his birthday. You could just faintly see his birthmark peeking out from where his bleach blonde hair curled under the hat.
“Hello, Sunshine.” He greets you, setting the coffee down on your desk.
You set the pen you were holding down, “Hi Yeosang.”
Upon first glance at Yeosang, you can tell he’s buzzing about something. He’s leaning over the check-in counter and chewing on his lip while making small talk with Hongjoong about the tourist season.
You raise an eyebrow, sipping your coffee as Yeosang turns back to you, “Do you remember Wooyoung and Yeonjun?”
You nearly choke on your coffee at the mention of your other neighbor and ex-boyfriend. Wooyoung had moved onto your street a few years after you had, and quickly became apart of the little bond you and Yeosang had formed. He moved to the coast with Yeonjun, your ex, the first chance they had gotten, but Wooyoung’s family remained in the neighborhood.
“I babysat Woo’s brother the other day…” You watched your friend, “Did something happen? Mrs Jung didn’t say anything the other day.”
Yeosang grins, and it’s his scheming grin, “Their band got signed,” He tells you, “They need a new bassist, and Wooyoung showed them that video you took of me from that show last month. Their label wants me to come down; play a few shows with them, record a couple demos. See if we have chemistry, basically.”
Your eyes widen - both out of excitement and fear. You were happy and excited for Yeosang! This is the opportunity he had been wanting for years, but you were also terrified.
You were terrified in a horrible, selfish way because you knew if Yeosang left to join Wooyoung and Yeonjun, he’d never come back to you.
“That’s… That’s great, Yeo!” You manage a grin whilst trying to shove the selfish thoughts away, “When do they want you there?”
Yeosang’s smile falters, just for a moment but you still catch it, “Monday.”
“F-Five days?”
He nods, “I’m leaving Saturday morning, so I can be there Sunday afternoon.”
You can see it in his eyes; he’s terrified too.
Before you can say anything else, Yeosang leans over the check-in counter and presses a chaste kiss to your forehead, “I have to get back to work, Sunshine.” He tells you, his voice quiet as if he’s giving you a secret, “I’ll see you later.”
He’s already halfway down the lobby when you swear and move out of your chair, you quickly call his name as you move out from behind the desk. You rush over to where he’s standing, and look up at him. He’s confused.
He opens his mouth to say something, but the words die in his throat when you pull him into a tight hug, “I’m proud of you, Yeo.”
Yeosang wraps his arms around you, pulling you closer to him. His chest is warm, and you’re sure you could spend hours here. He smiles, pressing another kiss to your head, “I know, Sunshine.” He pulls away, his hand on your arm, “I really do have to go, though. I’m already late for work.”
You nod, wrapping your arms around your torso as you watch him leave the hotel and turn down the street to go back to the convenience store. When you turn back around, Hongjoong is watching you with an amused look on his face.
You glare at him as you walk back to the desk, “Don’t you have a fiance to call, or something?”
----------------
You were tired.
Friday nights were always busy, but tonight was draining and loud and you could only take so much of Miss Liu’s incessant phone calls about mundane things at 3am. All you wanted to do was go home, and fall into your bed and sleep for hours.
Hongjoong didn’t help your mood either. It was an innocent question about Yeosang, asking if you’d seen him since he visited you on his break but it pushed your mood down to a low point. You had been so busy the past few days, and if you were being honest with yourself, you had been avoiding Yeosang.
You weren’t ready to see him leave. You knew it was selfish, but you figured avoiding Yeosang was easier than admitting you didn’t want him to leave you behind. You would just simply watch his life through Instagram and consider the ‘what-ifs’ in your life.
You shouldered your tote bag after clocking out before yelling a good-bye to Hongjoong. You could see the beginning rays of morning sun hitting the other buildings in the downtown core as you stepped out the employee doors, and then you were hit by the sight of Yeosang leaning against one of the pillars.
Your eyes widen, “Yeosan-”
“Come with me.”
You stop. Your words are left in your throat, “W-Wh… Go with you? To the coast?”
Yeosang nods, “Come with me,” He steps forward, taking your hands in his, “What do you have here? A degree you don’t care about? A job you hate?”
You frown, running over his words in your head, “I-I have my mom. And… I have Hongjoong!”
He raises an eyebrow, “Y/N, Sunshine… Your mom will barely notice you’re gone, and Hongjoong can visit us.” He cupped your cheek.
You’re so busy having an internal crisis you hardly notice the usage of ‘us’. You’re considering the logistics in your head. Yeosang was right; you didn’t care about your degree, and all it would take was an email saying you quit for them to find a new front desk person. Your mom would be upset for a few weeks. She’d probably make some passive aggressive Facebook posts about you before acting like your best friend again.
“Yeosang…” You look up at him, your hand coming up to circle around his wrist.
“Your sister is there, and you could write everyday.” Yeosang adds on, “I did the math, Y/N. Between the two of us, we’d have 6 months to figure it out. 6 months, and we’ll come back here if nothing works out.”
You stay silent for a moment.
“Sunshine, I promised I’d show you the stars, didn’t I?”
You gasp at the promise. It was a silly promise he had made when you were both kids; something you’d almost forgotten about.
It hits you quickly: there’s no one else you’d rather run away with. There’s no one else you’d trust to run away with.
You look up at Yeosang, “Yes.”
He grins, “Yes?”
You nod, “Yes, Yeo. I’ll go with you.”
----------------
An hour. An hour was how long it took for you to turn your life upside down for Kang Yeosang.
In an hour, you had emailed your program advisor and told them you wouldn’t be returning for the next semester, and you had called your manager and told them you wouldn’t be coming in for your next shift, or any shift after that (which was promptly followed by a phone call from Hongjoong, who seemed more excited about this than you were). You had packed up most of your clothes and important belongings, and they were loaded into the back of Yeosang’s shitty car. You left a note for your mother, and before you knew it, you were sitting in the passenger’s seat of Yeosang’s car.
----------------
You had fallen asleep barely an hour into the car ride. 
The rolling hills and fields outside your window made your eyes feel heavier, but you tried staying awake to keep Yeosang company.
“Go to sleep, Sunshine.” He tells you, “I’ll be here when you wake up.”
Yeosang’s promise was all it took for you to succumb to your exhaustion.
You don't usually remember your dreams. Though today, there are flashes of a beach, and a smile that takes your breath away. There are blue skies and if you try hard enough, you can just faintly smell sea salt.
You wake up hours later, smiling. True to his word, Yeosang is still there when you wake. He’s wearing a pair of sunglasses, and tapping his fingers to the beat of the song on the radio.
Yeosang smiles when he notices you’re awake, “I talked to your mother.”
Your eyes widen, “You talked to who?”
He laughs, “You didn’t answer your phone, so she called me.”
You frown, glancing at your phone in the free cup holder. You could imagine the amount of calls and texts that were in there.
“She wasn’t very happy.” Yeosang continues, “She wants you to call her when we get there.”
You nod, “Thank you, Yeo.” You say softly, looking over at him.
Yeosang throws you a smile, “Of course.”
“Not just for talking to my mom…” You watch him, “For not leaving me behind, too. Thank you.”
Yeosang reaches over, taking your hand, “I’d never leave you behind, Sunshine. You’d have to try really hard to get rid of me.”
----------------
The car ride was long, and full of Yeosang’s early 2000s emo playlist & fast food. You called your sister, who was ecstatic to hear about your plans and had immediately offered you and Yeosang her beach house. She made a comment about how ‘she always knew you two would end up together’, and it made your heart flutter when you glanced at Yeosang.
Yeosang told you about Wooyoung’s band, and how excited he was to play with Wooyoung. You smiled, listening to him fondly talk about your old friends and their music.
It was getting late though, and you could see it in Yeosang’s face that he was getting tired.
“We should stop for the night.” You tell him, “You’ve been driving since 6am, Yeo.”
He huffs, “We could drive through the night.” He proposes, “We’d make it to your sister’s place in a few hours.”
You frown, “Or... We could stop for the night, shower, and then leave first thing tomorrow morning. We'll get there by noon tomorrow.”
Yeosang glances at you, going to protest. He ends up yawning instead, his nose wrinkling slightly, “Fine.” He pouts.
You laugh, reaching for your phone to google the closest hotels. There's a comfortable silence in the car, filled with the occasional beat of Yeosang’s fingers on the steering wheel. You feel at ease, even if it's just for a moment.
“There’s a motel off the next exit.” You tell him, stifling a yawn of your own.
----------------
Sure enough, there had been a motel off the next exit. It was small and slightly rundown, but cheap and had an available room. You waited in the car while Yeosang went into the check-in office, promising to be back in a moment.
He came back dangling a key in his hand, and a slight frown on his face as he opened the car door to let you out.
“So... There’s only one bed.” He broke the news, a blush growing up his cheeks, “It’s all they had, unless we wanted to drive another hour down the highway.”
Your eyes widen, “O-Oh.” You glance at the key, and then back up at Yeosang, “I’ll sleep on the floor, or something.”
Yeosang frowns, shaking his head, “We can share for one night, Sunshine. I think it’ll be okay.”
Which leads you to here; lying almost nose to nose with Yeosang. Your hair was soaking wet from a shower in the tiny bathroom and the small motel bed wasn’t comfortable, but you didn’t seem to mind as you took in the man in front of you. You pushed the strands of bleach blonde hair out of his face, and your fingers softly lingered on the birthmark next to his eye.
His breath stuttered, “Y/N,” He says, his voice a mere whisper, “We’re free.”
You let your hand rest against his cheek. Your eyes lingered on his lips before you caught yourself, moving your gaze back up to his eyes.
Yeosang only smiled at you. He gently held your wrist as he tilted his head and placed a soft kiss on your palm, “I’m going to kiss you now, Sunshine.”
“Yes please.”
You felt every nerve in your body light up when Yeosang kissed you.
A small part of your brain told you that this is where you’re meant to be: in Yeosang’s arms.
You felt this way the first time Yeosang had kissed you too, all the way back on that roof in 11th grade. You two had been talking about the future; about your writing and Yeosang’s music. You looked up at the hazy night sky, and you asked Yeosang if you’d ever get to see the stars.
He smiled at you, telling you that he would show them to you one day before he kissed you so sweetly.
Yeosang still kissed you sweetly. He kissed you like you held the secrets of the universe in your hand for him to take.
You pulled away, “I think I love you.”
He smiles against your lips, rubbing soft circles into your wrist, “I think I love you too, baby.”
—————-
You had this assumption that the next morning would be awkward; that you would be stuck for the next 6 months with someone you could barely look in the eye because of a late night confession.
Instead, you awoke to Yeosang kissing your head and placing a bagel & ice coffee down for you. He had quickly ushered you into the shower, before you put on a change of clothes and were quickly led out to the car between bites of your bagel. This all happened over Yeosang telling you how you only had a few hours before you reached your sister’s beach house, and he wanted to try and make good time so you could enjoy the beach today.
You giggled at his antics before settling into the passenger’s seat for the last few hours of your journey.
You sipped your ice coffee as you watched out the window. The countryside on the highway zoomed by you, and the car was full of sunlight from Yeosang’s sunroof being open. There was a Fall Out Boy song on the radio, and you felt a sense of calm brush over you as Yeosang took your hand in his.
The sunshine had never felt so nice on your skin as Yeosang pressed a soft kiss to the back of your hand.
taglist: @vanishingboots @sunsethw4​ 
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staticscreenwriting · 4 years ago
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LOVE LIKE THE MOVIES // BUCKY BARNES // 7
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SEVEN - SERENDIPITY
Trigger warning: Alcohol, food
Masterlist
Summary: This is a story of boy meets girl. The boy, Bucky Barnes, finds himself thrown into a world that seems so different from everything he’s ever known. The girl, (Y/N) knows entirely too much about rom-coms and is quite particular about the way she eats her popcorn. Bucky meets (Y/N) a few months after returning to NYC. He knows almost immediately that becoming her friend is inevitable. This is a story of boy meets girl. This is a story about love. (Bucky Barnes x female!Reader // a few spoilers for TFATWS)
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“Okay, that’s ridiculous!” Bucky mumbles around a spoonful of fruit loops.
“What is?”
“This,” he responds and points his now empty spoon accusingly at John Cusack. “This whole fate thing. The book, sure, might happen. But the dollar bill? Never!”
(Y/N) puts her empty bowl on the couch table, turning her body towards Bucky and sitting in a criss-cross style. “You telling me you don’t believe in fate and soulmates and that some people are destined to be together.”
“No,” Bucky retorts in a tone that implies it was a silly question to even ask him. “I am 106 years old. If those things were true you'd think I would've found my destined partner by now."
"Maybe you have" (Y/N) shrugs. "Maybe it's Leah. Have you called her anyway?"
Bucky looks down sheepishly into the colorful milk swirling through his bowl. "No."
“ What? Why not? “
“Because it hasn’t — oh I don't know. It just hasn’t felt right.”
He’d been debating on giving her a call many times, never actually going through with it. At first, it was for a fear of failure, rejection. Now though, Leah doesn’t cross his mind as much as before. His thoughts, he noticed recently, are occupied by another person. And it wouldn't be fair to Leah or himself to try and build something on shaky ground at best.
“ Dude, I’m educating you on romance and you are too afraid to call this girl? “
“ Educating me? You are forcing me to watch rom coms. “
“ Forcing you? “ (Y/N) gasps and dramatically slaps her hand to her chest right above where her heart is. “ Are you saying you’re not having fun? “
There’s a smirk on her face, tiny and barely there but he notices it anyway. He’s started noticing the small things. Like how her nose scrunches up when she smiles and how she twiddles with her fingers when she’s nervous.
“ If I didn’t have fun I wouldn’t be here. “ Bucky replies and bumps his leg against her knee. Truth be told, he’d be here anyway. Even if she’d make him watch the most boring movie in the entire world he’d stay right there with her. Sometimes the world doesn't seem so rough and ruthless when she’s there beside him. Sometimes he feels like he could genuinely be happy.
“ Good, “ (Y/N) responds and places a quick kiss on his cheek that very nearly gives him a heart attack. Soft touches are something she grants him every so often and while he is getting used to it, it’s still foreign. It’s something he enjoys quite a lot though.
“Anyway, soulmates finding their way back to each other despite all odds is such a rom-com stable. Like the kiss in the rain or the airport chase or the top-of-the-stairs-moment.”
“ The what ? “
(Y/N) scoffs at him as if she’s never been asked a more ridiculous question in her life.
“ The moment when the girl gets a makeover or she dresses up in some ballgown and her love interest waits at the bottom of the stairs for her and when he sees her he’s so enamored and enchanted by her and ideally there’s some cheesy 90s love song playing in the background. And she meets him at the bottom, walking in slow motion obviously, and they don’t kiss or anything but the looks they share are enough to let the audience know what they feel for one another.”
Her words are heavy with passion and longing and magic and for a second Bucky wishes, he could be the one to give her that moment.
“ But okay, grumpy. You go on not believing in soulmates. I’ll change your mind one day, trust me.”
He doesn’t doubt it for a second.
They sink back into their blissful calm as John Cusak and Kate Beckinsale reconnect on the ice rink in front of Rockefeller Center as an ocean of Christmas lights twinkles in the background.
“ I’ve never been ice skating there. Been living here for so many years now and that’s still something I’ve never done. “ (Y/N) pipes up, a longing swinging alone with her words. “ Have you? “
“ Mmmh. Used to take a lot of girls on dates there. “
“ Oh sorry, I forgot you were a big charmer back in the day. “
“ Saw the first-ever Christmas tree getting set up in 1933. '' he continues to say. Sometimes talking about the past makes him sad. It’s a time he will never be able to go back to. A man he will never be again.
But sometimes, like today, he’s able to recall little snippets of memories and remember how he felt in that exact moment. And those are worth all the pain that thinking about the future might bring.
“ That — is weird flex but actually really cool. “
Bucky doesn’t think of himself as cool. He’s a grumpy 106-year-old who is completely disillusioned with the world around him. If (Y/N) thinks so though, he’s not gonna try to change her mind.
She snuggles back into him, body leaning against the smooth vibranium arm. A part of him he never felt really belonged to himself. Something he had been given to kill, to defend, to fight. If something so dangerous can be a place of comfort to her, Maybe, he thinks, it’s not so bad after all. Maybe sometimes you just have to let go of the part and change your perspective of things.
For a while, they get lost in the movie, in the fictional love of two strangers. He remembers the romance novels his mothers used to read. The way she would get lost in them. Maybe to escape her own life for just a second and follow along with the stories and the people that seemed so much grander than her own existence as a housewife stuck in a life that seems too small to contain her in all her wonderful glory. His mother, Bucky always knew even at a young age, deserved more than she had been given. She was smart and funny and she loved her kids as much as a heart could love another. But her days were dull and her marriage was one of convenience more than anything. She had ideas, beautiful stories swirled around her head, and she’d tell them to him and his sister before she’d tuck them into bed. And yet that is where they stayed, in her mind and in her children's memories. She was never resentful though. She took things as they came and she made them beautiful.
He wonders sometimes, what would’ve come from her ideas if she had been given the chance to tell them to a bigger audience. She could’ve put those rom-coms to shame.
A knock on the front door startles (Y/N), making her get up from the couch and follow LAdy towards the entrance. There’s a definite lack of warmth where she used to be and Bucky feels himself missing her already.
“ It’s probably Robin, she left her favorite jacket here the other — mom? “
The air fills with a chaotic mix of several voices one speaking over the other while the charm on Lady’s collar underlines it all with a jingling sound like that of a small bell.
Before he can even think about how to react, (Y/N) steps back into the living room followed by two more people. A woman who looks like an older version of her and a man. They seem lost in conversation still, talking about their travel to NYC and the fact that the man, who Bucky assumes is (Y/N)’s father, refused to ask for directions.
That’s until their eyes fall on Bucky. The woman regards him with a gentle smile on her face, polite and warm as mothers usually are. The man though. There’s something in his eyes, in his demeanor, that changed once he set sight on Bucky and it doesn’t feel good. Bucky knows what it’s like to be recognized. People see him and then they see all the bodies left in his wake, all the blood on his hands, all the pain and the suffering and the —
“ Sergeant Barnes. “
They used to call him that in Wakanda, as a sign of respect, he believes. To make him realize that they do not see him as the thread he used to be but the man he once was. Other than that it’s been a long time since people referred to him as Sergeant Barnes. It’s a title he takes pride in, something he worked hard for. It also belongs to a man he isn’t anymore. Bucky isn’t sure he still earns it. Still owns it.
“ Uh — hello. “
“Dad, “ (Y/N) says and pushes past her parents to stand next to Bucky. Her hand rests on his arm as a sign of comfort and reassurance. He appreciates it very much. “ Mom. This is Bucky. “
“ I can’t believe it. “ her father exclaims, still not taking his eyes off of Bucky.
“ Dad. “
“ I can not believe it. I can’t believe you! “
There it is. Although Bucky has always been very aware that he wasn’t nearly worth (Y/N)’s time, having it thrown in his face hurts more than he likes to admit.
“ Dad … “
“ You know James Barnes, and you tell me nothing about it? (Y/N) I’ve — I’ve spent so much time researching this man revising all the information people before me have gathered and making sure his legacy and his place in Steve Rogers' life get acknowledged and now I’d have the chance to ask him personally and you — you keep it a secret from me? “
Wait … what ?
“ Bucky, “ (Y/N) says and looks up at him with her gorgeous eyes that never seem to fail at calming him down. “These are my parents and as you can tell, my dad’s a big fan of yours. “
The next few minutes are a chaos of handshakes and nice-to-meet-yous and hugs. Her mother hugs Bucky real tightly, the way mothers do when they know someone needs a hug. And she doesn’t flinch when she feels the metal arm. She just hugs him a little tighter.
“ Why are you guys here? “ (Y/N) asks as her father throws an arm around her shoulder
“ Well, you asked us to look after Lady while you’re gone. “ her mother replies as if it’s the obvious answer.
“ Yeah, but we don’t leave until Friday afternoon. It’s Thursday. “
“ That is truuuue. But dad and I thought we’d surprise you and take you out for a nice dinner since we won’t be spending Christmas together, we thought we could at least try to make up for it. “
(Y/N) shakes her head at her mother’s words. “ I told you guys, it’s not a big deal. You go enjoy your cruise. “
“ And we will but you’re our girl and we want to take you out for dinner. Give your old parents that much, will you” her father jokes and ruffles her hair as if she was just a little girl and maybe she is in that moment, wrapped in his arms.
“ I uh — Bucky and I had plans. “
“ What plans? “ her mother asks, eyebrows raised.
“ Watching movies. “
“ Oh, those aren’t plans. Go get dressed! “
“ And James will obviously come with us, “ her dad adds “ I am not done asking him questions. “
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It’s not December yet but the restaurant is already decked out in Christmas lights and tastefully placed sparkly ornaments. The soft lull of Christmas carols being played on a piano flows through the room and Bucky is thankful to discover that while so much has changed, many of those songs have stayed the same. Maybe things aren’t all different right now. Maybe the fundamental things have stayed the same. Like the feeling of being with your family sitting by the tree, singing songs that have been passed down from your parents to you.
(Y/N) sits next to him, lips painted the exact same shade of red as her slouchy knit sweater. She looks so cozy and comfortable and soft and if he’s being really honest with himself, all he wants to do is hold her tight and get lost in her warmth. But this is good, as good as it can ever get, really. Sitting next to her, across from her parents who have been nothing but kind to him. They’re eating good food, drinking delicious drinks and her parents are sharing funny and slightly embarrassing stories about (Y/N). This is the first time he’s meeting anyone’s parents as the man he is now. And even back in the 40s things weren’t this calm and easy. If you went to meet a woman’s parents you better came prepared. This feels nice. Like he gets to be part of a family for just a teeny tiny moment.
“ So, how long have you guys been together? “ her mother asks around a fork of tiramisu. While Bucky only looks at her with wide eyes, (Y/N) almost chokes on her wine.
“ Mom, we’re — not. We’re friends. “
“ Oh,” her mother replies, looking unconvinced as her eyes move back and forth between (Y/N) and Bucky “ I guess I must’ve read that wrong. Shame, you would make adorable babies. “
“ Mom!”
Bucky’s sure his cheeks are the same color as her sweater and her lips and her fingernails. A beautiful bright red. Like a Santa’s hat.
“ I know, babe. You’re an independent woman who makes her own decisions and if you decide not to have babies that’s alright with us. As long as you are happy, so are we. Lady makes for a wonderful substitute grandchild. Just sayin’ if you were to have babies with Bucky they would turn out really cute. “
“ Okay, how about we stop talking about my imaginary potential future children, huh? You go tell me more about work, dad. How about that? “
As her dad starts talking about some history classes he teaches and the students, Bucky notices the change in (Y/N)’s demeanor. Her laid-back ease is gone. She keeps fidgeting with her hair and the rings on her hand. Without really thinking about it, like his body is working on autopilot, Bucky reaches out and grabs her hand under the table. It’s still weird, touching soft skin with his metal hand without the intention of inflicting pain. It’s nice though. It’s wonderful.
She doesn’t let go for a long time.
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Restrooms in restaurants are places where time is slightly altered. You’re sheltered from the noises of the main room but they’re still faintly audible through the door. The clinking of glasses and cutlery, the laughter, and the voices as they flow together like waves in an ocean.
It feels like you get a break from the real world for just a moment. To catch yourself. To take a breath. To look at yourself in the mirror and decide your next steps as the music sounds from the overhead speakers in a duller version as if someone wrapped the lyrics in thick cotton padding.
(Y/N) washes her hands while looking at her reflection. Today’s a good day. It’s not going the way she has expected it but it’s a good day nonetheless. Bucky and her parents get along like a house on fire. It’s a nice feeling but it also makes her so acutely aware of all the what-ifs floating around her head and her heart. Would it feel like this if she and Bucky were more than friends? Would it feel this — right?
Before her mind can come up with an answer to her own question, the door to the restrooms swings open letting in a sliver of the noise outside. Her mother steps in and looks at her with that signature mom smile. Like she knows you better than you know yourself. And maybe that isn’t entirely wrong.
“ Your dad and I are going to take a cab to the hotel. We’ll come over to yours tomorrow before you leave. Is that okay? Bucky said he’d walk you home.”
Of course, he’d say that. He’s a gentleman. He’s Bucky.
“ Sure that’s fine. I’m glad you guys came a day early. I missed you. “
“ We missed you too, baby,” she responds and pulls (Y/N) into a hug.
“ Now tell me something,” she says and takes (Y/N)’s face in between her hands. “ You and Bucky. There’s something there. “
(Y/N) shakes free from her mother's touch and faces the mirror, leaning both hands against the marble sink. “ Mom, can you leave it. “
“ I see the way you guys look at each other. I — you haven’t been this happy in so long. He makes you happy. “
As she lifts her head and looks into her own eyes in the mirror, (Y/N) feels a flood of emotions wash over her. Emotions she’s tried so hard to suppress and others she wasn’t even aware were there in the first place. And it’s all comes crashing down pulling her under and spitting her back out.
“ So what if he makes me happy. We’re not gonna happen. I can not lose a friend and he can’t either. It would kill us both. “
“ Oh honey, “ she goes to pull (Y/N) into another hug but she just shakes her head in response.
“ No. No, mom. It’s okay. I’m okay with it being the way it is. “
“ Are you sure? “
Is she? (Y/N) looks back at herself. You think you know yourself and what you want and how you feel and then someone asks you, truthfully asks you if you’re sure. And you can only stare and wonder. Well, are you?
And sometimes it’s way easier to lie, to both the other person and yourself, than to really face your fears and your feelings and everything you do or don’t understand about yourself.
“ Yeah. I am sure. “
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It’s true. New York City never seems to fully go to sleep. There’s always a light on somewhere, guiding you through the dark, guiding you home.
It doesn’t fully go to sleep but it slows down. The air gets heavier, the noise gets quieter.
(Y/N) and Bucky slowly make their way through the familiar streets of their neighborhood as the city lights and the stars fight over who gets to shine more brightly upon them.
It’s a chilly evening, winter is truly just around the corner, and the air feels pregnant with the promise of snow and yet (Y/N) feels a warmth course through her that is unlike any other. A warmth that can only be brought on by being with your loved ones.
“ It’s a lovely night,” she says as her heels create a clip-clap sound against the pavement.
Bucky has his hands stuffed deep into the pockets of his jacket and his ever-present scowl decorates his face and yet, even Bucky can’t deny that it is a lovely night. One with so much potential. For — for lovers.
“ It really is.”
“ If life was a movie, “ (Y/N) says “ this would be when we realized that we're in love"
Bucky only raises his eyebrow at her, pushing her to elaborate. And maybe it’s a bit selfish. Maybe he just wants to hear her entertain the thought of them two as something more for just a little bit longer. Even if it’s just pretend.
“ We’d get a montage of some quirky dates that we didn’t realize were dates. Then the camera would pan down on us tonight, walking underneath the stars, the city lights glowing around us. There’d be some piano music in the background to set the mood. We’d have a deep talk about our fears or messed up childhoods or the meaning of life. And then you’d make me laugh and I’d accidentally hold your hand. You’d drop me off at my door, think about kissing my lips but then end up kissing my forehead. Once you leave I’d lean against my door, sink down to my floor, and grin like a fool because that’s the moment I realize I am in love with you and the audience would sigh in relief because they knew all along. “
“ That sounds nice,” Bucky replies, eyes staring into the distance as he tries to picture it all, safe it as a mental snapshot to go back to in quiet moments.
“ Yeah, well what a shame life is not a movie and we’re not in love. What a waste of a lovely night. “
“ Guess it’s perfect for a couple, huh? “ Bucky has to agree with her.
“ Mmmh. Or at least someone not in heels, “ (Y/N) jokes looking down at her shoes.
“ You want me to find a couple? Gift our night to them ? “ Bucky asks as they continue their journey down the Brooklyn streets.
“ Absolutely not, sir! “ (Y/N) responds and links her arm with his as she pulls him along. “ I like our night. I want to keep it for ourselves. “
And so they continue their walk home. Words that want to be said, that need to be said, hang heavy in the air, and yet they both decide to stay quiet and just enjoy the silence and comfort of their lovely little night.
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The door feels like mocking her as it comes into view, cutting their moment short, putting an end to this blissful night.
She doesn’t want it to end. Doesn’t want to go inside and quite literally close the door to all the possibilities this night seems to hold out to her. If she was just brave enough to reach out and grab them.
(Y/N) unlock the door and turns back around to face Bucky. Something seems to hang in the air right between them and that feeling only gets stronger as their eyes lock. For a moment all there is, is silence and an abundance of unspoken words. And a fear that comes with speaking them. Of messing something up. Of being vulnerable.
Bucky smiles at her then. She loves his smile. It’s so rare but it’s so beautiful to look at. It gives you the feeling of having done something right.
“ Thanks for today, “ he says as if there’s anything to thank her for.
“ For what? “
“ Letting me be a part of your family. Thought maybe you didn’t want your parents to know about me. Thanks for — not being ashamed of me or anything. “
“ Oh Bucky, “ she says and grabs his hand, “ You are my friend and I love you. I’d never be ashamed of you. If anything I’m a little embarrassed by the way my dad kept pestering you with questions. Uh — why are you looking at me like that. “
“ You love me? “ his voice comes out but a mere whisper and his eyes are wide in shock.
“ Yes. You’re my friend, I love you. Bucky when — when was the last time someone told you they love you? “ (Y/N) asks as her hand softly strokes the side of his face.
“ 1942 “
“ Well, guess I’ll have to keep reminding you then, make up for lost time. I love you, Bucky Barnes. “
She can’t even blink before she’s wrapped up in his arms. Despite what one would think, Bucky is always warm. Even the vibranium arm. Everything radiates warmth and comfort. She could stay here forever.
Slowly he pulls away, looks deep into her eyes, lowers his head, and places his lips against her forehead. “ I love you too. “
He smiles at her once more then leaves. And while she won't admit it to anyone, ever, (Y/N) goes inside, leans against her door, sinks to the floor, and doesn't even try to suppress the foolish smile spreading on her lips.
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Robin’s laughter fills the halls of the beautiful Inn where just tomorrow she’ll say I do.
“ This was your doing! You scheming little shit.” (Y/N) grumbles from the corner of her mouth as she slides up to Robin.
“ It wasn’t, “ the red-haired girl laughs “ but I wish it was. It’s hilarious.“
Redstone Lodge is a beautiful Inn located in upstate New York. It looks out onto a lake and is surrounded by lots and lots of Christmas trees all year round. It’s made of bricks and big wooden panels. Very rustic and yet cozy and elegant. In the yard, there’s a huge tent with a wooden floor and a see-through roof. That’s where the reception will be held tomorrow.
Redstone Lodge has 35 rooms all of which have been distributed to the various guests. They’re beautiful rooms with nice decor and comfortable beds. Well — a bed. One. Singular.
“ This is like some fanfiction trope, Robin. There is only one bed? “
“ Look," Robin says and pulls (Y/N) closer “ if you want to switch, find someone to switch with. I’m sure someone is willing to. But I’m just saying that if you two are friends, shouldn’t you be able to sleep in a bed together and not make it weird? “
She has a point and she knows it and she also knows that (Y/N) knows it.
Huffing a breath of annoyance (Y/N) grumbles an “okay fine” before letting Robin be taken hostage by yet another overly excited aunt and returns to Bucky’s side as he stands on the front steps looking out into the vast area. It really is a beautiful place to get married.
“ Hey so uh — bad news is that this is the only room they have so we’ll have to share a bed. Good news is they got some movies to take up to the room and I found some really dope rom-coms. “
“It's okay, don't worry. I promise I won't hog the blanket,” Bucky says and nods his head into the direction of the lake “ wanna take a walk? “
“ Sure. Yeah, why not. “
In all honesty (Y/N) isn’t the biggest fan of walking around the woods with no particular destination in mind and yet she can’t help but feel a sense of happiness fill her as she links her arm with Bucky’s once again.
She realized a while ago that she tends to gravitate towards his left side. It isn’t a conscious decision but maybe it’s a good one nonetheless.
Maybe it’ll show him that every part of him is worth loving, even the ones he doesn’t love himself.
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“ When was the last time you did something crazy? “
He doesn’t like the way those words sound tumbling from her lips. He does, however, like very much how her eyes sparkle in the light of the setting sun. Their walk had turned into a bit of a hike and by the time they’ve finally made it back to the lake, the sun is about to set. Everyone seems to have retreated back into the lodge, maybe to sit by the big cozy fireplace or up to their room with their several beds. More than one. plural.
Bucky doesn’t want to let go of their time together though. Not yet. Just a little bit longer. And if that means agreeing to one of her weird ideas, so be it.
"Uh well, I fought aliens a few months ago."
"Huh … well see that's not an answer I was prepared for I mean more like, when did you last do something stupid but fun?"
“Like dancing in the middle of a street or having a cake fight in a parking lot?”
“Yeah …. like that.”
She looks at him again with that mischief and that softness. Like a mix of all things that make you feel alive shine back at him from her eyes.
“Wanna go swimming?” (Y/N) asks and smirks at him.
“Now? It’s freezing.”
“ I know,” she replies and shrugs her shoulders “ and I know it’s silly and dumb and we’ll probably get sick but I kinda wanna do it anyway. Wait … can you get sick?”
“Huh?”
“Because of the serum.”
“You know, they didn’t exactly give me a manual when they injected it so — guess we’ll have to find out.”
“So you’re in?”
Bucky only nods his head in agreement. She doesn’t need to know that he’d agree to anything she suggests. Any little thing.
The woods around them are dark and thick and where they probably should be scary they are comforting now. They’re a shelter from the eyes of onlookers. A safe roof and walls to keep their little bubble safe and hold their moment tight and safe.
“Holy shit, it’s freezing!” (Y/N) hisses through clenched teeth as the water reaches up to her shoulders, the straps of her yellow bra the only colors shining through the dark night.
Don’t think about it. He has to tell himself. Don’t think about the fact that she’s only in her underwear. Don’t think about her soft skin and her smile and what her body feels like against yours. Don’t!
He doesn’t have to scold himself for too long before a cold splash of water hits him right in the face.
“Oh, you made a mistake” Bucky calls out to a laughing (Y/N) who tries her best to tread water and get as far away from him as possible but fails to do so, being wrapped up in his arms only seconds later.
For the next few minutes, they splash around like children at the neighborhood pool.
The cold of the night and the lake rattle their bones but neither of them seems to care as a familiar warmth wraps itself around their hearts.
It’s really fascinating how the little moments can become so meaningful. How one person can mean so much so quickly. How drastically your life can change just because of one single person and their kindness and their love.
“Oh-oh!” (Y/N) exclaims excitedly and lays little enthusiastic slaps on Bucky’s shoulder “let’s do the dirty dancing lift. You can lift me, right?”
“I have a vibranium arm…”
“Right. Yeah. Right.”
Bucky places his hands on her waist and pulls her a little closer, trying to ignore the incessant thumping of his heart that feels like it wants to break out of his chest. “Okay on 3.”
“One”
Her eyes look deep into his as if trying to search for something in them. Secrets. Hidden feelings. The truth.
“Two”
And when she smiles, almost shy, it seems for a second that she’s found whatever she’s been looking for. He hopes she likes the secret she uncovers. He hopes it doesn’t scare her off from loving him.
“Three”
In a swift motion, he lifts her up above his head, holding her strong and steady as drops of water, cold as ice, rain down on him while (Y/N) laughs and stretches out her arms.
“We did it! I’m flying, Jack!”
“What?”
“Nevermind.” She retorts and lets out another laugh. Yeah, maybe he’s freezing his ass off but to hear her laugh like that, makes it all worth it.
He doesn’t let her fall over like they do in the movie, instead, he grips her waist tighter, slowly and gently lowers her back into the water. And when she’s back right in front of him, chest against his, he should be letting go of her, but he doesn’t.
While his head keeps screaming at him to just let go, his heart tells him otherwise, makes him stay right there.
(Y/N)’s arms move across his chest and gently wrap themselves around his neck before her fingers start to delicately play with his hair.
He wonders if any person has ever felt the way he does in that moment. He wonders if maybe a poet or a writer or a musician has and if maybe they wrote a poem or a book or a song about it. Maybe that would help him understand. Maybe he could read it or listen to it and keep this moment captured in that piece of art forever. Because he fears that no memory can ever do justice to the way he feels when she moves closer.
When her hand cups his face when her nose nuzzles against his so gently as if she’s afraid he’ll pull away any second.
It’s just them and their wildly beating hearts and the woods providing them shelter and the water setting the scene and the stars shining down upon them.
It’s just them — until it isn’t.
“(Y/N), Bucky? You guys out there?” Robin's voice calls out into the night as her silhouette appears against the light coming from the porch of the Inn.
“Yes, it’s us. We’ll be right in.” (Y/N) calls back, having moved away slightly. The spell is broken and Bucky lifts his hand off of her, immediately missing the contact.
“It’s freezing, we should probably go inside.” She says and grants him a smile, though it doesn’t entirely reach her eyes and he can faintly see her shivering.
“Yeah let’s go. Get you warmed up.”
They don’t talk about their moment as they head inside and get swallowed by the group of people all hyped up with excitement for the coming day.
Bucky is sure though that as long as there are stars in the sky, he will not forget this moment however fleeting and insignificant it might seem.
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whatifyoulivelikethat · 4 years ago
Text
pause, m | myg | 2
pairing(s): yoongi x reader
summary: Life is like a cassette tape. It seems like it’s constantly repeating, flipped from side A to side B, and the songs can’t be skipped. You can only pause, rewind, fast forward, play after you’ve already heard the song. After you’ve already lived it. All Min Yoongi knows is his own tape, until it smashes right at his feet, and then he has to learn to dance to a different beat.
warnings: rated M (18+) - please be warned this story has a physically and verbally abusive relationship; language; emotional manipulation; gender stereotyping; non-idol!AU; music producer!Yoongi x dancing fanatic!reader
rated M because I know how sensitive a topic domestic abuse is.
The music reader listens to is inspired by Frederic, specifically their songs ‘oodloop’, ‘OWARASE NIGHT’, and ‘Kanashii Ureshii’ and you can look up the MVs on YT. They have subs, yes the lyrics inspired certain scenes, no I have no idea what is going on, and I don’t know why they’re dancing like that lol
1.
-
She slapped him across the face.
You froze.
The cassette smashed.
“I hate you, Min Yoongi!”
She shouted it so loud that you heard it over your music. Your finger instinctively went to your earbud and tapped it, pausing the sound. You couldn’t believe your eyes. What had this guy done? What had this guy done to be yelled at like that the second he stepped off the night train to stand in front of his girlfriend?
“Useless piece of trash, always fucking late!”
Slapping him over and over, so loud because the train station was completely empty except for you and these two, yelling obscenities and the guy was just standing there, taking it, saying, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, sorry for what? Why did she keep hitting him? Why? Stop it. Stop hitting him.
“Such a fucking waste of life, I can’t believe I have to be your girlfriend!”
Stop it.
“No one will ever fucking love you, you shithead, so I’m stuck with your stupid self!”
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry…”
Mumbles. Fear.
Stop it!
“You think anyone will ever do anything for you the way I do? I’m all you have!”
Within two seconds, you crossed the space between you and them.
You smacked her hand away from him.
Pause.
You hesitated to press play. Standing in front of this random guy you didn’t even know, fury in your chest so strong that you forgot you were a stranger, glaring at this scowling, rage-filled woman with vehement disdain. You had no idea what the fuck was going on, you had no idea why he was being slapped so much, you had no idea why this woman was so angry and maybe there were very good reasons for it all, but somehow.
Somehow you didn’t think so.
Play.
“Stop it. He said he was sorry,” you barked, narrowing your eyes.
Her pretty face twisted with rage. “Who the fuck is this bitch, Yoongi? A whore you picked up?”
“I… I don’t know her…” the man behind you rasped, trying to move around you, but you kept yourself between the two, shouldering your backpack.
“I don’t know him. I just know you shouldn’t be hitting someone like that.”
The woman snapped at you, rising to her full height, challenging you. “This isn’t any of your fucking business. This is between me and him and doesn’t concern outsiders. Tell her, Yoongi.”
But you didn’t let Yoongi tell you, cutting him off as he tried to speak.
“This isn’t my business, but I’ve seen enough examples to be able to spot domestic violence when I see it,” you growled.
The woman scoffed, flipping her hair. “Domestic violence,” she snorted. “He’s a man. It’s not like I hit him that hard. I’m a woman.”
You curled your hands into fists.
“You stupid bully.”
The woman looked taken aback. “What?”
“I said, you’re a stupid fucking bully,” you snarled, taking a step forward and forcing her to take one back. “You think this is nothing, until you have children and your children have to watch this shit over and over, every night, thinking it’s right, thinking it’s the way it should be, but you’re fucking wrong, because this is not a relationship, this is not love, this is fucking bullying and you are a stupid, dumb bully who can’t admit you have an inferiority complex and your kids will spend years in fucking therapy wondering why they don’t understand how to make relationships with other human beings because their mom was a terrible fucking example, so do me a fucking favor and get the fuck out of here and leave this guy alone, because you are an absolute sewage of a human being.”
She gawked at you, slack-jawed, probably never been talked to in such a forceful manner before, but you didn’t care, because you didn’t spend years in therapy to watch this shit happen right in front of your face.
Never in your entire life had you ever been so angry at a stranger before.
The woman seemed to gather her bearings and spat at the floor, staining the concrete with her spit. You raised your eyebrows, unintimated. She stamped her foot at your lack of reaction, pointing accusingly at Yoongi behind you.
“Don’t you ever think about coming back home. I’m burning all your shit.”
She turned her heel and stomped away.
You almost expected Yoongi to run after her, but he didn’t. He just stood behind you and breathed laboriously. You suddenly realized that you might have done something mildly insane. She said she was going to burn all his shit.
“Hmph,” you heard the mumble behind you. “All I had was clothes anyway.”
You turned around. He wasn’t looking at you. His black hair was all over his face, and his face mask was half-pulled down, revealing his red cheeks. You looked away quickly, taking a step back.
“Are you… okay?” you asked quietly.
You saw his eyes shift around. He didn’t actually respond. Just shrugged.
You bit your lip.
Silence.
“There… are no more trains,” the Yoongi guy whispered.
“Y… Yeah.”
Silence.
The lights above you were harsh, casting large shadows all over the concrete. Nothing but the sounds of the city and the darkness above, the moon witnessing it all.
He turned away from you, walking over towards the benches. Walking away. The crumpled paper of a man, shrinking as he took one step, then another, farther and farther away from you, and you opened your mouth to shout after that black back, extending your hand in the air.
“H-Hey!”
Pause.
He turned his head around to look at you with broken and lonely eyes.
“If you want… I have a couch and some blankets.” You swallowed, knowing how crazy it was. “Because… You shouldn’t go back. I…” Don’t want you to end up like my dad. “Even if it’s one night.”
I want to break this cycle.
“Just one.” You lowered your hand, holding up one finger. “One.”
Yoongi didn’t say anything.
Only turned around wordlessly and walked back to you, stopping in front of you. Saying nothing.
He didn’t say anything the entire walk.
Didn’t say anything as you opened the door and gestured him inside. Showed him the couch, got him the blankets. Asked him if he wanted anything else. He shook his head instead of talking. You ran to your room and got him a spare pillow. Held it out to him. He took it silently. Ran off again and got a new toothbrush from your stash of toothbrushes. An unopened travel toothpaste. Asked him if he wanted anything to eat. A glass of water. He shook his head.
Showed him the bathroom. A shower?
Shake, shake.
Okay.
You told him if he was cold to let you know. You would find another blanket.
Yoongi said nothing.
You nodded and turned away, letting him be. It was hard to look at him. You didn’t want him to think you pitied him or anything. But he reminded you too much of your dad if you stared at him too long. You had gotten him everything you could think of and let him know that if he needed anything to tell you.
You went to your bedroom and let out a big sigh.
No dance party tonight.
You went to your computer and opened Spotify. Put your headphones on and listened to the music, letting it carry you away. Before you knew it, one song flowed into another. You slowly began to bounce your head to the music, the cheerful, quirky beats making you smile, your hands moving on their own, lip-syncing the lyrics.
A happy tune with sad lyrics, but it made you smile at the same.
You failed to notice Yoongi appear at your door, holding his phone. He needed a charger. Did you have one? And then he saw the back of your head, bouncing along, headphones on.
He retreated back to your living room, clutching his phone. Decided to go to sleep instead.
Hours later, you finally decided to sleep, placing your headphones down. Was Yoongi sleeping? You padded over to the dark living room, seeing a bundled form on your couch. His coat was over the blanket. His head was under the blanket. Was he cold? You went back to your room and collected a pink knit one. Walked back to the living room and moved his jacket aside onto the armchair, putting the extra blanket on top of him.
His phone was on your coffee table, flashing. It was low on battery.
You checked if it was Android or iPhone. Android. Good, because you didn’t have a lightning cable, although you would have gone to the twenty-four-hour convenience store nearby to get one if he did have an iPhone. Back to your room. Got a charger and struggled to find an outlet in the dark. You’d think you would know where your own outlets were, but apparently you were too sleepy to remember. You felt around in the dark and poked at an outlet, stabbing the wall repeatedly before plugging it in. Maybe you should have turned a light on, sheesh.
You snaked the cable around and plugged his phone in. It vibrated approvingly and you gave it a thumbs up, even though it was an inanimate object.
Let’s just say living alone made you weird.
You let out an exhale and wandered off to brush your teeth.
Not noticing Yoongi had woken up and been watching your struggle. Saying nothing.
Pause.
Fast forward.
-
Morning.
You yawned and nearly jumped when you saw the unmoving pink blob on your couch. Oh, right. You were surprised he wasn’t awake, but you shrugged. The blankets were over his head, blocking out the sun. You tried to stay quiet, opening your fridge, staring at the contents.
Staring at it with a million question marks.
You had… kimchi. Eggs. Cheese. Definitely expired take-out. You took that out and dumped it in the trash can, grimacing at it. A stranger didn’t need to see how disgusting that was. You went back to your fridge. Um. It wasn’t that you couldn’t cook, it was that you didn’t have jack shit. And if you cooked on the stove, you would definitely wake up Yoongi.
Your stomach screamed in rage.
Feed me!
Ah, well. Sorry Yoongi. You settled on a kimchi-egg-cheese pancake thing. Was it going to be good? Sure. Was it not the most elegant thing in the world? Maybe. What can you do?
You began to chop the kimchi.
-
Yoongi turned over on the couch, groaning. He heard the sizzle of the pan. Smelled spice. Eggs. The world was unfamiliar. No one was yelling at him to get up. No one was doing the blankets off of him and calling him a lazy pig. 
"Motherfuc–!"
A female voice cursed in a loud whisper. You cut yourself off, muttering.
"Stupid oil, ugh."
Not his girlfriend. 
Slowly, Yoongi pulled the blankets off his head. An unfamiliar scent, different laundry detergent than he was used to. The sofa smelled different too, like vanilla with a hint of stale popcorn. Probably from being dropped in the cushions and forgotten about until months later. 
His stomach growled. 
The smell of the food enticed him. He got up, seeing you at the stove, wearing black pajamas with the sleeves rolled to your elbows, and a cream scrunchie holding your hair up. You made a face at the pan and scolded it. 
"Who's the boss here?" you hissed hotly at the sizzling food. "That's right, me, because I'm about to eat your ass, so simmer down and stop trying to singe my arm hair off."
Yoongi blinked. 
He got off the couch as you continued your quiet tirade, shoving your hand into a bag of cheese and sprinkling it on top, laying down a generous layer. 
You should cover it, Yoongi thought. To let the cheese melt. 
You grabbed a pan lid, and covered it. The lid definitely went to a separate set because it was a different shade of silver, but it didn't matter. You mumbled triumphantly at the pan. 
"Ha, take that, you stupid eggs, who's in the hot seat now, eh?"
Yoongi stared.
You lifted the lid and checked the cheese. A billow of smoke floated out. You seemed satisfied and turned off the gas. Lifted the pan and spun around. 
Froze. 
Yoongi blinked at you. 
Your eyes were wide, still holding the hot pan. 
Silence. 
A good ten seconds past. 
You slowly put the pan on the cork potholders at the counter. Two plates were at the counter with two sets of chopsticks.
"Uh... I made a kimchi-egg pancake t-thing..." you stuttered. "With cheese on top. You don't have to eat it. But I'm not going to poison you or anything. Er, well, that's something a someone who would poison you would say, huh? Oh, maybe I should have checked the expiration date on the kimc–"
"Why do you talk to your food?" Yoongi asked pointedly.
You turned bright red. 
"Um... bad habit. 'Cause I live alone..." You shifted your eyes. "No one... to talk to."
Yoongi stared at you. 
You turned around abruptly and grabbed a knife. Took off the pan lid. The kitchen was suddenly filled with the delicious smell of eggs and kimchi. The cheese bubbled as you cut it into pizza-like slices.
Yoongi sat down at the barstool, staring at it. He was the one who usually cooked. He hadn't had a home-cooked meal by someone else in forever. Not since he lived with his parents. 
That was a long time ago. 
"I seasoned the eggs beforehand and poured it on the sautéed kimchi..." You placed a plate with a pair of chopsticks in front of him, ears still red. You avoided looking him in the eye, scratching your cheek. "I, uh, have to go grocery shopping," you mumbled, taking a slice. "Sorry it's not that fancy..."
Yoongi picked up the chopsticks and took a slice. He blew in it carefully and took a small bite. Spicy, savory, delicious. He took another bite. And another. The food was hot, almost burning the roof of his mouth. This must be a dream. He wasn't in his nightmare. He wasn't going to question it. 
As long as he wasn't in his nightmare, he could pretend this was reality. 
Yoongi didn't notice you watching him with relief. 
He took another slice. The meal was quiet, but not suffocatingly so. It was calm, only interrupted by chewing. You reached into the cabinet below you and produced a water bottle. Put it next to him. Didn't say anything. Yoongi are three more slices, throat prickling with the spice, lips puffy, before he opened the water bottle and drank from it.
"If you want, I can direct you to a shelter."
Yoongi put the water bottle down. Stared at his stained, now empty plate. 
"Or you can call a friend to shelter you," you continued. "You can even get a restraining order if we involve the police–"
"No."
He said the word with harsh finality. 
"It's not that bad."
It wasn't. He was just being a child, running away. 
"... Okay."
Yoongi looked up. For a split second, there was immense pain in your eyes. Why? None of this was happening to you. You didn't know anything. You were just some stranger. Why was he even here? Why had he come here to sleep on some random couch? So dumb. Some random woman couldn't save him from his problems. 
... Your kids will spend years in fucking therapy wondering why they don’t understand how to make relationships with other human beings because their mom was a terrible fucking example...
Yoongi stilled as he remembered your words from last night. That was far too specific. His brows furrowed. You let out a sigh and took his plate.
"Do you want a shower?" you asked. "I have spare towels."
Yoongi tilted his head. "I don't have a change of clothes." He stared at the hardwood floor. "And my other clothes are probably burned by now."
You placed the dishes in the sink and began to wash them. 
"We can go buy some. I need groceries anyway."
He didn't understand why you were being so nice to him. It was strange. You didn't know him. Well, actually... he didn't even know your name either. 
"Uh..."
You looked up from the dishes, hands covered in soap. Yoongi did all the dishes at home. He did all the housework, in fact. This was weird, watching another person do housework. His voice was quiet, timid, crumpled like a piece of paper. 
"What's your name?" 
-
"Do you want white or black?"
You held up two multi-packs of t-shirts in his size.
"Uh... Black."
You dumped the black in the cart and put the other back. Yoongi stayed behind you, not picking out anything. You were wearing your backpack, a black cap, red wide-knit sweater, and black jeans. Black combat boots, the familiar staple for you. The two of you are standing in an aisle at the local convenience store. Yoongi was still wearing the same clothes from last night – black parka, black turtleneck, black jeans, black face mask. 
He mostly stared at the floor, following your boots. 
"White or black?"
Yoongi looked up to see you on the other side of the cart, holding two multi-packs of underwear. White briefs and black boxer briefs. He felt his cheeks heat up as you blinked at him. Instead of speaking, he grabbed the black boxer briefs from your hand, intending to chuck them into the cart.
Except his jacket sleeve caught a strand of your red sweater, the Velcro sticking to and unraveling it, so that when he twisted his hand to throw the plastic pack into the cart, the yarn tangled around his fingers and got caught, rapidly getting pulled around. Your eyes widened, gasping as the red string was yanked from your sweater. 
"O-oh!"
"Fuck!"
His hand was tangled in it and the part around your wrist tightened, the missing yarn causing the constriction. Yoongi cursed again, trying to shake free, panic rising. Oh no, fuck, what if you got angry? What if you started yelling at–?
You laughed. 
You started laughing. Yoongi froze, slowly lifting his head to witness your laughter. Your shoulders shook, shaking your head, big smile on your face. The yarn hung in the air, shaking a little.
The red string connecting you to him. 
Yoongi stared. 
At you.
His heart thudded in his chest. 
Thump. 
"Hold on," you chortled, reaching over and following the red yarn.
Thump.
His heart was like a bass drum. Consistent and loud, rhythm in his own ears. You untangled the mess slowly, carefully, wrapping the exposed end loosely around your wrist. Finally, it was off his fingers. Your fingers were centimeters from the back of his hand. You grasped the red yarn tightly. Yoongi looked at the end, trapped in the Velcro of his parka.
Thump. 
A fleeting feeling. 
Happiness.
You ripped the red yarn off, the end frizzy and scraggly. 
Another fluttering feeling. 
Sadness. 
You backed up, going back to the cart, tucking the end in next to your wrist, all chuckles. Thump, thump, thump. He couldn't breathe. It was impossible. What was going on? Why did he suddenly start shaking all over?
"I'm sorry," he blurted, breathless in panic. 
You shook your head, waving a hand. 
"Don't worry about it. This thing is old anyway." You pointed to the rack. "Is four enough? Or do you need more?"
"U-uh..."
"Let's get one more. I can always return it if you change your mind."
-
"Do you have a job to go to? Because I have to go soon," you were saying as you shoved the groceries into the fridge. Yoongi was unwrapping the plastic and cutting off the tags from the few clothing items you two had bought. 
"Um... yeah, I work at a music studio..." Yoongi mumbled. "I make my own hours."
"And it ends right before the last train, right?" you affirmed, nearly dropping the green onions and making a mad dash for them before they touched the ground. Whew. You shoved them back in your fridge. You didn’t really have an organization system. You probably should. Being an adult was hard.
"... Yeah."
"Cool, you should take a shower now then. I'll get a towel, hold on!"
You scrambled out of the kitchen to find a towel in the linen closet, the fridge door still open. 
"... Alright..."
-
Pause.
Fast forward.
-
Yoongi spent the entire train ride tense. You sat in your usual spot, humming along, bobbing your head to your music in your earbuds. Neither of you attempted to sit next to the other. Yoongi fully expected his girlfriend to be there as he stepped out of the train, at the last stop. He thought he was going to get yelled at once again. He thought she would be there to smack him upside the head again. He braced himself as the doors opened, exhaling deeply as he walked out of the sliding doors.
"Ugh, I need some energy," you mumbled behind him, yawning. 
No one was there. 
The bright streetlamps only illuminated the concrete. 
"Hey, Yoongi."
He turned his head to see you tilting yours. 
"You coming?"
You bounced on your heels. He remembered your usual routine. 
"Wanna race?" you asked with a big grin. 
-
Morning. Night. Morning. Night. 
Empty station at the last stop. No one but you and him getting off. 
Morning. Night. 
"Hey, Yoongi."
Morning. 
"You coming?"
Night. 
“Wanna race?”
Repeat.
The cassette tape replayed over and over, flipped around in the stereo, day in, day out, stuck on replay, a weird reality that wasn't his until it became his, seeing your face when he woke up, watching you cook breakfast in the morning, chastising inanimate objects when you thought he wasn't looking.
Your lips asking him once again. 
"You coming?"
Then you and him, breaking out into a run, racing to your apartment. 
At first, Yoongi didn't smile. 
Then one day, he did. 
And he kept smiling, smiling as he ran breathlessly with you. 
-
"What are you doing?"
You froze. 
Literally one second before you heard those words, you had been wiggling your arms like an octopus in front on your full-length mirror, flapping the long sleeves of your over-sized blue sweatshirt, your billowy knee-length gray shorts following suit. You reached up to your Bluetooth headphones to take them off.
And realized, with heated cheeks, that the music was not coming from your headphones, but the Bluetooth speakers on your desk, blaring the odd twangs of guitar and quirky drum beats, paired with whiny, almost nonsensical lyrics. 
You turned around. 
Yoongi stood at the entrance of your bedroom door, staring. He was wearing a black t-shirt. Black sweatpants that were slightly too short, exposing his pale ankles. 
The song went into the guitar solo. 
He blinked at you. 
"Uh... dancing?"
Blink. 
Normally after work, Yoongi would either be asleep or watching television in your living room. You told him cable came with the apartment and you never watched TV, so he should at least watch some in your stead. You usually went to your room. The first couple nights, you only danced in your chair. Then you got up and danced next to your desk, and then you were back to your wacky mirror dancing, thinking that if it was though headphones, then Yoongi wouldn't notice. 
But, of course, you had disturbed him with your music blasting through the speakers, which had never been disconnected all this time because, well, how were you supposed to know? They must have connected because your over-ear headphones died.
"That was dancing?" Yoongi echoed.
Your eyes shifted. "Er... it's stress relieving?"
Yoongi stared at you.
Blink. 
The song changed. One of your favorites. 
Your shoulders began to bounce. Your head tapped to the beat. Then your heel. 
Blink. 
"Are you possessed?" Yoongi asked with a deadpan look. 
The tune was getting to the good bit with the xylophone. Fuck it. He had already seen you octopus it up. You began to bob your head from side to side, breaking out to a big grin, shooting him some finger guns before going back to your full-body jiggle and arm flapping, singing along on the top of your lungs, prancing around your room, Yoongi staring at you the entire time in mild shock. He probably thought you were psychotic, but who cared, because you were clapping along to the snare drum, skipping in circles, pointing at him at certain parts in the lyrics and playing air guitar. 
His normally downcast cat-like eyes were huge.
You grabbed his hands at the guitar solo and he yelped, his arms rippling as you swung them around, you stumbling through the lyrics, singing the absurd words, and Yoongi gawking wide-eyed.
The song went to the final chorus and you wiggled like a fucking squid. 
Only to see Yoongi burst out laughing and wiggle his arms with you, tiny wiggles compared to your full-blown tentacle swings, but it made you laugh too, because it was all stupid and ridiculous and very embarrassing. 
With a start, you realized you had seen Yoongi laugh. 
And he looked so wonderful laughing, perfect teeth and pink gums, huge smile and scrunched-up face, black hair falling back from the strength of his chuckling, revealing his lovely fair-skinned features and those cat-like eyes sparkling.
Sparkling with brightness. 
The song ended and you were panting breathlessly.
Yoongi raised his eyebrows in disbelief, half-smirk on his lips. 
"Your music taste is nuts."
You smiled as the next song started. 
"Nah, this is just my nighttime dance party music. It's supposed to be crazy."
You flapped your sleeves to the beat of the drum. Grinned at him. 
"Because every night should be a dance party."
And you started dancing again, Yoongi watching you and laughing, even joining in sometimes. 
From then on, every night was a dance party. At one point, Yoongi started to bring you songs and weird beats he discovered for you to dance to. He even said a few times, "Hey, I made this. Can you make a dance from it?"
You'd dance to anything. 
You weren't great at it. 
But it was always hilarious. 
And it was always worth it, watching Yoongi laugh all night. 
-
Pause. 
Fast forward. 
Wait. Are you sure?
You can always rewind. 
You don't have to press play. 
Pause.
Play. 
-
“Do you like rap?”
You were sitting next to Min Yoongi on the night train. There were still people around, not yet the last stop. He was clutching his phone, face mask on his chin. He looked a little nervous.
“Yeah, of course. I like all music,” you said cheerfully. “Something you want me to dance to?”
Yoongi chuckled a little, giving you that little half-smirk. “No.” He took a deep breath. “I’m a… music producer. And I… I make music. And I wondered if you wanted to listen to a little bit my mixtape.”
“I do.”
Yoongi looked taken aback. You grinned.
“I definitely want to listen to it.”
You connected your earbuds to his phone and listened carefully. His words, his beat, his rhythm. Yoongi sat beside you, wrapped in his black parka, looking nervous as he chewed on his lip, but you didn’t notice, bobbing your head to certain bits, mouthing the chorus, raising your eyebrows as he altered the framework of a traditional song. He had only five tracks on the playlist, but you listened to them all, holding his phone. When the playlist ended, you clicked back to your favorite parts and replayed them, over and over, listening to his strong, raspy voice.
Yoongi sounded confident when he was rapping.
Like he was meant to do it, perfectly expressing himself with his simple words and elegant phrasing, his anger, his sorrow, his hopes. You could tell there was an underlying theme, an uncertainty about the future. As if he was taking steps to an invisible, unlit path, and he wasn’t sure whether to run forward without a guiding light or go back to all he knew.
You handed him back his phone with a smile. You understood him a little better now.
“Well?” he asked, still biting his lip.
“I really like it,” you said. “Especially your vocals. It’s different from other voices I’ve heard.”
“… It’s not that–”
“And I like your lyrics. They’re simple, but they pack a punch and make you think.” You smiled widely. “I like music that makes me want to listen to it over and over again. That’s how your rap makes me feel.”
Yoongi looked stunned.
You pointed to his phone. “You could release it just like this, if you wanted.” You tilted your head. “Hm, maybe a few more songs though. It seems like you’re trying to tell a story.”
He blinked rapidly, putting his phone in his pocket. “Y-Yeah… I’m working on a few more that I want to add.”
You nodded. “That’d be awesome.”
The train screeched to a halt. There was no one in the car. That was your cue. You stood, stretching first and then shouldering your backpack. Yoongi stood as well, pensive and silent. The train doors slid open. He walked out first and you followed. Streetlights harsh and bright on the concrete. Yoongi did his usual routine of looking to the edge of the train station.
Both of you froze.
“Get the fuck over here, Yoongi.”
You recognized her. She might be wearing a different dress and a different coat, but it was the same woman all right, with the same harsh scowl.
“I knew you wouldn’t be a man and face the music. Instead, you went off prancing with some whore.”
“She’s not a whore,” Yoongi muttered, pulling up his face mask.
You didn’t say anything. There was a sudden pressure on your chest, an overwhelming, tense heaviness, because you knew what was coming.
“Are you telling me that you’re not going to come home to the woman you supposedly love, the one you were supposedly going to marry and give a comfortable life to?” the woman accused. “Are you telling me that you can’t take responsibility for your actions? That you’re not a man, but a child?”
Yoongi took a step towards her.
The weight in your chest felt like a ton of bricks crushing you.
Another step.
“Yoongi.”
He turned his head, dark brown eyes flickering to you.
You smiled.
Smiled even though the moment was killing you.
“I… I have to finish this,” he mumbled, the sparkle in his eyes dulling with every passing second.
You kept the bright smile on your face.
Like a cheerful-sounding song with sad lyrics.
“Okay.”
Pause.
You wanted to rewind. You wanted to rewind so bad, even if it was only to ten minutes before this painful moment. With a shaking hand, you pressed play.
“My door is always open for you, Yoongi.”
He made eye contact with you. He nodded.
“Goodbye.”
You turned and ran.
Ran and ran, hoping he was running after you, but you knew he wasn’t, you knew he was walking towards that toxic woman and you could do nothing about it, you couldn’t care, you just had to keep running, running and running until you hit your front door, fumbling with your keys and running inside, slamming the door closed.
You froze.
You wanted to scream.
Instead, you ran to your room and threw up a specific playlist, a playlist full of cheerful-sounding songs with agonizing lyrics, hopeful beats tainted by upsetting words, and danced the night away, danced and danced. Not wanting to think about the blankets on the couch, the suitcase you had dragged out to let Yoongi borrow and put his clothes in, not wanting to think about his toothbrush on your bathroom sink, not wanting to think about all those nights dancing stupidly in this bedroom with him, and focusing only on dancing alone, singing the night away, on and on and on until you couldn’t stand anymore, couldn’t sing anymore, and you just fell on your bed and passed out, completely drained.
Physically.
Emotionally.
Empty.
-
3.
--
masterpost
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