#and i get sad seeing ppl be down on themselves abt their creations

[dandyshucks]

the difference btwn irl and online perspective on creativity is so funny to me and idk if I'll ever get used to the stark contrast of it all.

IRL when I mention that I draw and write, people act like I'm some super talented creative genius(???). they don't seem to understand the concept of OCs, and if I try to vaguely touch on my DL project they get visibly overwhelmed no matter how simple I make it for them, and eventually they settle on just insisting that I need to publish traditionally and monetize on it. they don't seem to have the ability to understand the concept of zines and immersive storytelling through non-traditional means.

but then i get online and I'm just another drop in the ocean and always a very mediocre drop at that LMAO, I constantly fight with myself to feel like there is any sort of value to my stories and art, and there's hundreds of people doing the sort of thing that I do but even better than I could ever dream of doing!

it's just so strange going from interacting with this online to IRL, I feel like I'm getting whiplash from being largely ignored or scoffed at online (which I'm fine with btw lol I grew up with that in my family and now I get nervous when I get too much attention) to people at the centre treating me like I'm some kind of artistic genius who cannot be understood because I'm too far above their level 😭

[theangry-ace]

R18 drama cd short review

I actually wrote this with other aro and/or aces in mind, but then again I never met or talked to another non-sex repulsed aces and I don’t know if they do this type of p0rn. so this is just a short review from a new fan for new fans who just need a title to start. I tried not to be too spoilerific.

you can sampled everything from airavalky.

nobody asked but here’s part 2. part 1 is here.

Hatsukare ecchi [finished, maybe] story: 4/5 icha icha; 4/5 review: story is pretty cute. younger type guy. theme is sharing all the first times with this dude.

Hetare dakedo Suki na Kare [finished] story; 5/5 icha icha; 4/5 review; abt a passive/low self esteem office worker guy and his web designer girl who is quite the opposite of him, personality-wise. the whole story is sweet imo since the girl never forced the bf to 'man up' or some shit but rather let him has his time and pace and give encouragement whenever necessary. i'm all about this positive relationship. plus points for tetrapot<3

Honnou no kajitsu [finished, maybe] story: 4 / 5 icha icha: so much sex / 5 review: concept is someone ate a fruit and personality got a 180 degree change. story is interesting... if you can get over the sex in every tracklist. buckle up! vol.1 (sawa manaka) = storywise this is the best. guy started as a selfish asshole who treats his girl like a toy. he ate a mystery apple and changed for the better in the end. vol.2 = a friend with benefit between a office worker and her boss. not much story here i think but guy started as a bully then after mystery fruit he wanted to be the one bullied? vol.3 = this is a 3P. a drunk/drugged type. i dont do much 3P to compare but this one has anal if that's your concern. i'm not comfortable at how kinda forceful/not sober this one is. vol.4 (aoi yuuma) = can't really catch what is their relationship together but it started out nice and ero but after track 5, fucked up twist happen. you can already guess what it is at this point. dude also mentioned about the mystery fruits but i can't quite catch if it's his creation or not.

In the room [finished] story: 5/5 icha icha; 5/5 review: i never expected to cry to a porn but i did. i would never have expected such a sad story from a drama cd's cover art so generic. def give this a try if you want story. it started out strangely direct with the sexing but later you learned that the guy is desperate for a good reason. chasuke really did a convincing acting i cried for him. the story is about a girl asked to come to a mansion to meet a guy. she has no memory of him but somehow he knows everything there is about her.

Incubus lullaby [finished, maybe] story; 4/5 icha icha: 4/5 review: well i like it. kinda need a sequel though. basically abt a girl dumped by her bf so suddenly and a strange man approached her and they had a one night stand. the guy kept finding her later and revealed to be an incubus. dont quite catch the why he chose her though.

Inma [finished, maybe] story; 1/5 icha icha: only sex and more / 5 (bonus 3P) review: interesting concept of two polar opposites character voiced by one actor, but my brain got fucked halfway it kinda made me uncomfortable. if you just need the porn and not really the story, here is a good choice. trigger warning, some might passed over the rape borderline.

Kannou shousetsuka [finished, maybe] story; 3/5 icha icha; 4/5 review; there's two volumes that i can find and my current level of japanese can't really tell if they're continuation of one another or independent to its plot. both is abt the same guy, an erotic novelist, and a girl i assume his girlfriend and his work's fan who is also the muse. he'd ask her to play out a scene he wanted to get the surreal image for his writing or something. one volume is abt outdoor sex while the other is bondage. the bondage one ends pretty badly since he went overboard and scarred her. always have a safeword, kids.

Kangoku [finished] story: 3/5 icha icha: 3/5 review: when i see tetrapot i just instantly believed i would like it. but then this is not the type of story i am comfortable to enjoy. story is about a town/city conquered i think and girls got snatched up to be made sex slave at prison... i think. our guy is supposed to be the 'nice' ones bc he said unlike other guys he dont hit and injure his pets. good to hear that, dude, you want a cookie? anyway there's another plot going on that lead to our guy murdering his superior but by then i lost my interest completely.

Kare pillow story; too many volumes to rate but as general 4/5 icha icha: too many volumes to rate but as general 4/5 review: a pretty big series and there's lots of good voices and the story is pretty good too. first volume is car sex. i have no idea that's a thing. also this is where i got into Hirai. he very moany but voice is very sweet.

Kare to soine de shitai koto zenbu story: 3/5 icha icha: 4/5 review: just sex in bed but with various voices to meet your likings. kinda sweet.

Kimi no te de iyashite [finished] story: 4/5 icha icha: 3/5 review: aww it's about a guy, played by domon, taking care of his girlfriend who got hurt from a fall down the stairs at work i think. the sex right at the end which is rather unnecessary at that point imo.

Kioku no fiance [finished] story; 5/5 icha icha; 4/5 review; storywise is very good. the girl was to marry a first born of a family but he died before they do. so the most logical thing is to let her marry the younger brother instead??? the younger brother has personal problems in living in his brother's shadow. together though they got through everything and i dont ask much more than this for a happy ending.

Koakumakei danshi [finished] story; 3 / 5 icha icha: 4/5 review; the type of character i like sawa mannaka to play as. a kouhai from school with a liking to tease the girl. sawa fits best as playful toshishita in my book. basically abt a guy who found his crush back in school drinking alone, then later... well you know what comes next. what ~ always ~ comes next after a love confession lol.

Koibito vs nijigen story: 5/5 icha icha; 5/5 review; repeat after me, if you want lol in ur drama cd, pls find one with murano. this one i'm pretty sure has a second volume but the one i have with murano is basically abt a guy whose gf is a fujoshi and he tried his best trying to imitate her fav 2D bf to make her like him better. made me think that i really really want to buy all of murano's work.

Koibito miman [finished, maybe] story; 4/5 icha icha: 3/5 review: i think the theme is how a couple was born. yuuki (asagi yuu) - this was the first time i got to know asagi and he's very calming. it's about two ppl who never got their feelings honestly conveyed, their friends had to lie to them abt their group trip to a ryoukan, just so they have the privacy and time alone together. saeki - they're osanajimi but with a large age gap between them. dude was very worried when he noticed he no longer sees the girl as a little sister he needs to protect and more like a woman he wanted as a wife. tachibana (sawa manaka) - guy is a very cheerful and tease a lot but he actually has feelings for his senpai from part time work. he'd go through a fucking typhoon to make sure the girl will be okay since she lived alone and had stepped on broken glass when the electricity cuts off. he is best dude bc he gives girl her own time to think abt what to feel abt him.

Kyokugen joutai [finished] story: in spaaaaceee / 5 icha icha: zero gravity sex / 5 review; interesting concept but kinda fell flat halfway. i think we started in a colony or something in space but something blew up so the guy and the girl ran to an emergency pod and drifted in space. zero gravity sex later, some spaceship did came to pick them up but weirdly can only take one of them. guy wanted for the girl to go but she refused so they drifted again. i haven’t actually got to the last track (got disinterested at this point) so idk if they survive or not.

Kyuuketsuki night parade [finished, maybe] story: 5/5 icha icha; 5/5 review: ok. i like the concept of vampires now (fuck you senbura) and this is a very good series. pls do more. please make more vampire shitttttt. anyway, there’s a ball in a mansion and some ppl would find themselves in there unconsciously. it was actually how the vampires lured human into their realm to find a mate. vol.1 = a very cheery guy who's very happy to find out the girl is a vampire and offered to be her mate. i like this one best but it does gets to you when he talks about how he had friends and family and wanted to tell them abt everything even after the girl kept saying he can't ever get out of the vampire's world anymore. did he want to stay or not?? vol.2 = ...honestly this one is not that interesting I barely remembers anything. I’ll give it another chance later. vol.3 = this is the deepest voice i've listened to. guy is actually a vampire hunter who at first planned to murder every vampires in the mansion bc of his vengeance of his entire family's death.