#and i dont know what im doing after graduation yet maybe i should just plan it right after that

[ispyspookymansion]

public opinion poll. trying to do my top surgery before i graduate in may so i am only missing classes. or after when my thesis is done and i am trying to find/keep my first industry job

[nostalgicks]

its like 4am im not proofreading any of this sorry BUT maddie buckley and eddie diaz bestieism are my life now heres how theyre actually bffs + my headcanons

S2:

they had heard a lot about each other through buck and even met for the first time through buck

buck invites some of the 118 to come help maddie move into her new apartment, and eddie and chim agree because oh it would be nice to meet buck’s sister and welcome her into their little found family

maddie and eddie bond over being new to the city (awkwardly, because theyve just met err) and then maddie exchanges numbers with eddie n chim.

they dont really text or talk to each other until eddies ceremony in 2x18

the day of the ceremony they have many laughs together. maddie meets chris and ADORES him.

aunt maddie promises to take him out for ice cream one day because seriously she cant get over how cute he is.

S3:

so that s2-3 hiatus where buck and chris magically become best friends? oh yeah eddie and maddie grow a little closer too

i just know when theyre at barbecues they will find each other and GET ON that gossip ! [insert reality tv show here] was pretty crazy last night eddie did you see it yet?

theyre like party friends at this point like they wont arrange a separate time to hang out yet but they love each others company.

eddie hears things about maddie and maddie will hear things about eddie and theyll go “hey theyre kinda like me lol hah”

“what about eddie?” “wheres maddie?” “hows eddie doing?” “maddie doin good?” every once in a while. very subtly..

theyre both going through it and need help god help their poor souls

they still ask about each other after s3a, but become a little distant

like maybe theyre left alone at an outing and now they have no choice but to make mean but gently mean jokes to one another.

“eddie dont encourage him to go to war!” was one of many interactions that night

they dont really get time to talk at mays graduation party

S4:

QUARANTINEEE eddie sees maddie everywhere.

but not in person. eddie sees maddie through chimneys laptop so often that sometimes chimney will run to the bathroom while on call and he will take that opportunity to ask maddie how shes doing. how maddies little mango is doing.

“hey just saying you should name the kid eddie. you know, because im your friend and all 😁” then maddie will roll her eyes. and then ask about christopher.

they start to text wooo go guys utilize those numbers!!!

most of the time its nothing important theyll play imessage games and maddie will ask him for his book and movie recommendations

maddie and eddie bond and share their thoughts on not seeing the people they love and how much of a toll the pandemic is taking on their mental health vrrooom

but they only let these secrets out at NIGHT when everyones asleep except those two . because his brain wont let him sleep and bucks snoring like a tracker and for maddie the baby is keeping her ass UP ⬆️ no sleep for this mama

eddie returns home and a few months later chimney goes back too. when buck jumps from the diaz house to the buckley han apartment he always brings gifts that have come from the other.

maddie bakes for chris and eddie, and eddie will . ah well he returns the Tupperware.

whenever he comes over he offers to help fix maddie’s pipes (because he feels like returning tupperware isnt enough) but after she runs out of things in her house that need repairing she MAYBE starts shoving muffins down her drain so he can come over more LOL

eddie notices and decides not to confront her about it. he just makes a reminder to tell chimney later

chimney is also playing an important role in this 67 step plan to bring eddie diaz to the buckley han house. him and maddie are in this together

then soon enough eddie makes a habit of dropping by maddies apartment to buy her scented candles and sneak her starbucks. maddie does the same but with big dad sweaters she found in the clearance section at walmart. its a very comfy cozy couple few months

oh and eddie gets a girlfriend and then buck and taylor and brain explodes there is no tiimmee 

but eddies respectful towards his friends see he congrats her on her new baby and he may be a busy guy but he will never get sick of the baby pictures maddie spams in his dms

chris enjoys the jee spams just as much as he does

ouch well eddie gets shot i guess. crap. well darn what are we- oh and maddie has ppd.

S5:

eddies high on painkillers always sleepy and maddie is trying her best to make it through the day.

a few weeks into his recovery eddie requests buck to drive him to maddie and chimneys. chris is at school and chimneys at work and well why would buck deny

maddies surprised to see him, but not shocked. she makes them lemon green tea while eddie gently plays with jee for the first time (!)

he is dying from cuteness overload shes grabbing his hand and her fingers are soo tiny oH my god she made a noise

they sit on the couch on opposite sides just silently drinking their tea and watching jee squirm and make silly noises with her tongue. its kind of therapeutic

maddie breaks the silence with her thoughts “i don’t know if im doing this right, eddie.”

eddie lets her speak and lets her pause to catch herself for as long as she wants.

he understands how it feels to not know if youre doing the best for your own. not on maddies level, but thats something they do have in common.

he makes sure to give her the softest hug he can give her with his one arm and remind her before he leaves that shes an amazing mother.

they promise to hang out together more.

eddie didn’t actually know she was leaving L.A. for a bit. he heard the news and prayed that she was safe and working on recovery.

with maddie gone, the hole in his heart feels a little more hollow. christopher’s nightmares coming back and his own fears overtaking him, him leaving the 118 for his son, he feels like he needs someone he can talk to about this. someone on the same boat as him.

shortly after maddie comes back, eddies driving to her apartment every WEEK.

ofc he understands shes still not fully recovered, so he gives her her space for a little while and lets her settle back in with chimney and jee

once she sees him at the door, she instantly goes in for a hug, lighting up at the sight of him.

eddie spends that afternoon helping her finish all of her background chores, and then they reward themselves with the new tea eddie had brought over

turns out they hate the way it tastes so they dump it out and go back to their regular lemon green tea with ginger.

eddie cheers her up by surprising her with whip cream and caramel syrup. even if it kind of doesnt make sense, it makes her laugh

“eddie is your new job at a coffee shop?!? how are you so good at this?”

and eddie continues to spoil jee yun with toys while aunt maddie does the same for chris

so basically if you’ve read this much THEY’RE A FAMILY eddie and maddie have got so much in common man they’re always bonding over something. frank who? i only know eddie and maddie

+ chimney

chimney comes home from his shift one night and finds maddie and eddie leaning against the couch on the floor with the tv playing some dramatic reality show. he walks closer to find them both passed out. the first thing he does is take a picture to tease them later, and then he collapses face first on the couch beside them for a long nap.

+ buck

eddie and maddie will invite buck to their little playdates sometimes. sometimes he invites himself. usually when he does come tho, he’s forced to become the chef for them, since they both cant really cook that well 😓

+ karen

karen has always been a close friend of eddie and maddie but creating this book club has been the single greatest idea theyve ever come up with

christopher denny and jee yun playdates all the time plus its like a mini potluck party every time they meet up

theres no book club most of the time they drink wine and joke around eat food maybe bake too. just living their life as they should!

knitting Oh my god knitting is so their thing. “christopher come here let me see if this would fit you” “aunt karen please i have 9 already can you make me a hat instead”

[tirednotflirting]

tøp austin | june 23

[yyxgin]

a lot has happened at work recently!! but who cares bleh. libra season!!! which means bday celebrations!! except i’m at work BOO 👎 and my two assistant managers have officially left (i’m helping them move on wednesday) and they were probably the only two who knew when my bday was apart from my supervisor but he’s gone to a different branch to train to be an assistant manager before coming back so i’m super bummed bc now i have to deal w al the new staff by myself 😭

also one of the ladies in kp read my palms?? and she told me i spend too much money impulsively which isn’t false… but i have to spend money impulsively or if spend none at all (which is good for saving ig) but i’d also be doing nothing other than working and that would make me sad lol. she also told me bc i’m a libra this month i’ll be unlucky with love but lucky with money so 🥺🙏🙏 i was having a relatively bad day that day so she was cheering me up n all of that.

did i tell you when my txt and skz albums came, they also came like a week or two later (again) bc they’d accidentally doubled up my order? it was like heaven with skz bc changbin baby is my ult n he was in some of the pulls for the second album 🥵🥵 the limited edition of no easy confuses me bc it’s not like the last one of theirs i bought and typically groups stick to a style when they design albums like mamamoo are all in these cute magnetic flip box thingies and nct’s are all little books type things as well as txt’s but skz switched it up and there’s a fair bit of loose stuff? but it’s okay bc i have two posters n all of the mini flip card things for the members and some bangchan (i’m gifted in pulling chan).

im also hopefully getting a car?? the barman hasn’t gone to prison yet bc the court keep moving his sentencing date(s?) so when i discussed this w my mum she said they’ll probably throw it out and relief filled me!! but ik i shouldn’t be so hopeful but at the same time it’s like why would you mess someone around so much? anyway i’ll move on, i wanted to drop him home in my car bc he deserves a lift everyday what a sweetheart❣️ my co-worker facetimed me today as it was my day off and i said hi to everyone it was so heartwarming to see everyone missing me but also not bc my manager overworks me and he knows that after this weekend 💉🩸

im jumping about with my points and things i want to say but i’m horrible at internet friends so this is okay for me as recently i’ve just not had energy for any friends which is awful of me but i’m still trying to find the balance between work and social. also everyone’s gone to uni and i’m just chilling. i like my life.

i want to redecorate my room. i don’t like the vibe other than when people compliment my kpop wall bc it’s a bunch of my art and then other peoples art and i thoroughly enjoy decorating w pictures and stickers and stuff but it’s literally just a door and it’s depresses me that my happiness is reduced to the back of a singular door now. i want to redo the vibe in my room and make it more me. i’ve never felt comfortable until recently and even now i’m going back to feeling uncomfy now that i know i want it a certain way and to give a certain vibe. idk, maybe it’s bc i watched sex education and seeing lily’s room in the most recent season (i won’t say much more in case you are watching/haven’t seen it yet) really made me realise i want to love myself and love the space i create for myself more. do you enjoy your space you’ve created for yourself? i always feel like peoples rooms say a lot about them as a person but how they see their room in their own eyes always says more.

i want to ask loads of questions and am awful at asking them so please just tell me everything i missed or should be updated on!! ily, always

~ 🌻

LIBRA SEASON !!! omg did i ask you when's your bday ?? i hope i didn't miss it. >:( happy birthday !!!! you deserve so much love. also, i'm sorry about your managers leaving. dealing with new staff is hella stressful and i hope you don't have to have too much responsibility and nerves <3

ooh palm readings are hella interesting. i've never had one but i think i'd like to try. spending money impulsively isn't a bad thing, if it's not an irresponsible spending. and if it is,, well who cares. yolo. i feel you on that tho, bc even tho i am really stingy w money, sometimes i just buy stuff i don't need and act on impulse.

OMG THAT IS A DREAM ?? getting free albums ?? (at least i hope they were free lmao). i like it when groups stick to one type of packaging although i must say i dont like the book thingies nct uses bc there is no magnetic part so it falls apart on my shelf and i hate that. i acutally like the sleeve packaging txt's albums have ?? everyone seems to bitch abt it on tiktok but i find it the most conveniet. also i'm glad changbin came home to you <3

YAAAY TO THE CAR !! AND ALSO TO YOUR COWORKER. i am praying he won't have to go, then, i am really hopeful. he is a sweet soul and doesn't deserve that. pleeease don't put up with your boss overworking you. take care of yourself :(

YOURE NOT HORRIBLE AT INTERNET FRIENDS we are besties. okay ??? and its totally okay to have no energy for friends as well, bc as you can see, i am struggling as well recently. it took me so long to reply to this ask and i feel so bad but it is what it is :// social battery has been low and i am busy with studying and work and trying to put my shit together. i am rooting for you !! <3

go for the decorating !! i actually haven't watched sex education and am not planning on watching so i dont really understand what you mean, but i hope you get to create a space for yourself when you feel free and comfortable. i share a room with my brother so its kind of difficult to decorate it how i want it, but i honestly like sharing a room tbh. he's not here half the time anyway so it's good to see him at least when we go to sleep lmao. but i have a bunch of stuff in my corner that are kpop and my side is full of plants, so i feel good surrounded by them hihi. i like it here.

i don't have many updates. i am actually living a very boring life, so i have nothing to share. preparing for graduation exams has been making me anxious and also depressed with everything that's been going on lately, but it's okay. i'll pull myself together <3 i love you a lot, take care !! i missed you

[izzielizzie]

I just wondering if you could do a headcanon based on Champagne Problems by Taylor Swift, cuz im sorta in love with that song but i dont mind who. Thx so much, u dont have to tho ❤

Yes! Champagne Problems is my absolute favorite song on the album along with Tis The Damn Season so I’m very excited! This is a Keely/Luis fic, which I've never done so I’m confused too don’t worry, but it does make sense I assure you. Also, there are ticket men and balls so um,,, have fun deciding what time period this is in because I don’t know. Enjoy!! Also there are notes at the end.

You booked the night train for a reason So you could sit there in this hurt

”Are you sure you want the three am train?” the ticket man asked. No, Luis was not sure and he had half a mind to go back to Keely’s house as fast as he could, but he didn’t have that choice anymore. 

”Yes, thank you.” Luis and the man exchanged money and tickets. 

”Well, have a good night then,” the man said. 

”Doubtful,” Luis muttered as he sat on a bench to wait for the train.

Bustling crowds or silent sleepers You're not sure which is worse

Luis ran his hand over the ring box in his pocket as he waited in the silence. It was strange, to be able to hear his own thoughts when an hour ago he was surrounded by so many people he could hardly hear Keely’s voice. 

Because I dropped your hand while dancing

His hand still tingled, where hers used to be. He could still feel the way her fingers slid along his palms for the last time as she spun away from him. 

Left you out there standing Crestfallen on the landing

Luis could still feel the snow on his coat and on the knee of his best pants. He could feel the biting cold on his cheeks as he watched her blubber apologies he couldn’t hear. 

Champagne problems

He leaned against the railing of the balcony as he watched her drown cup after cup of the champagne he knew her family always bought.

Your mom's ring in your pocket

The box he had warmed in his palms and opened to the cold felt heavy in his hands. The ring he had seen glint on his mother’s finger every day until it was too heavy for her  to bear was too painful to look at. He wanted to see it glint again, but the snow was in the way. 

My picture in your wallet

Luis pulled out his wallet to see how much money he had, and if there was enough for the train when he saw the picture he always looked at: Keely, his mother, and himself laughing at his high school graduation. It was the last time his mother left the house.

Your heart was glass, I dropped it Champagne problems

Luis felt his heart shatter as Keely smashed the top of the next bottle in the hall downstairs.

You told your family for a reason You couldn't keep it in

Luis’s brothers made a beeline for him when he slowly walked down the stairs, his money where Keely’s hand should have been.

”Did she say yes?” Manny asked.

Luis didn’t answer. The look on his face was answer enough.

Your sister splashed out on the bottle Now no one's celebrating

Luis’s sister-in-law came towards them with a glass of wine in her hand. 

“Did she say yes?”

Manny shook his head at his wife.

She dropped her glass, the red wine splashing onto her dress. 

Dom Perignon, you brought it No crowd of friends applauded

Cooper handed Luis the bottle of wine Luis had brought earlier that afternoon when he entered the kitchen.

“Are we celebrating?” Nate asked.

Luis shook his head. 

Your hometown skeptics called it Champagne problems

Vanessa Merriman, Luis’s friend from childhood laughed a short humorless laugh as she pulled herself up onto the counter, her ball gown fluffed to one side.

”It’d call it too much wine if you asked me.”

”I’m sorry Luis,” Bronwyn added, pressing a gloved hand against his arm. He shook it off. 

You had a speech, you're speechless

He had a speech planned. He had wanted to thank his friends for supporting him. For reminding him how much his relationship with Keely had helped him grow as a person. 

Love slipped beyond your reaches

“I loved her,” was all he could say. Olivia, Vanessa, and Bronwyn pulled him into a hug, their arms around him as his shoulders shook and the bottle slipped out of his hands, staining his shoes and the hems of their dresses. 

And I couldn't give a reason

”Did she tell you why?” Kris asked.

Luis shook his head.

Champagne problems

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Vanessa miming drinking to Kris, who nodded with pursed lips. 

Your Midas touch on the Chevy door

Luis could see her new car through the window of the kitchen. He could see the handle he pulled on to open the door for her whenever they went for drives. It was the only thing not covered in snow.

November flush and your flannel cure

Keely had been shivering the first time they exited that car five weeks ago. They were going to their old dorm for the last time with their friends to visit his younger brother. Without a second thought, he pulled off his flannel jacket and wrapped it around Keely’s arms. 

He didn’t have to think about much in their relationship. 

"This dorm was once a madhouse"

Luis could still remember the day Vanessa dared them to a game of soccer in the halls when they all woke up with major hangovers. “What a mad house,” he had commented as everyone laughed.

I made a joke "well, it's made for me" how

The joke was a small one that they had all found amusing and then forgot about, until now.

“She really was mad huh?” Olivia asked.

“I guess.”

Evergreen, our group of friends

“She’s messed up everything,” Vanessa added. 

Don't think we'll say that word again

“We won’t be us without Keely,” Bronwyn agreed as she wrapped her arms around Nate, who was leaning against the stove.

Luis didn’t question how they all agreed to drop Keely from their group. It seemed natural.

And soon they'll have the nerve to deck the halls That we once walked through

“Oh, sorry.” Everyone turned to look at Keely in her black dress and gloves. 

“What do you want?” Olivia asked.

Keely’s eyes darkened. “This is my house. And I’m getting the Christmas decorations.”

They watched as Keely walked through the kitchen to the door that concealed the basement steps. Decorations felt odd for a time like this. 

One for the money, two for the show I never was ready, so I watch you go

Luis stood and watched as she disappeared down the steps. 

Sometimes you just don't know the answer Till someone's on their knees and asks you

“God, she wasted an eight year relationship,” Vanessa said, shaking her head.

Eight years. Luis didn’t know how badly he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her until she refused to.

"She would've made such a lovely bride What a shame she's fucked in the head", they said

His friends’ words were still in his head as he sat in the train station. 

“She’s fucked up Luis, it’s not your fault.”

“There’s nothing you can do when someone like that makes up their mind.”

But you'll find the real thing instead

“Hello. May I sit with you?” Luis looked up to see a girl with a beautiful white gown and a green coat and cap standing in front of him. He could see her shining amber eyes, even though it was dark in the station.

“Do I know you?” Luis asked.

The girl smiled and nodded. “I left the same party as you. Keely’s? I’m Bronwyn’s younger sister.”

Luis knew he recognized the voice. “Maeve?”

“Yes.”

“Why are you here?”

“I needed to go home, and Bronwyn wasn’t ready yet. I’m not fond of Christmas parties.”

“Neither am I,” Luis said. Maeve laughed and fiddled with the skirt of her dress. It really was the prettiest dress Luis had ever seen. 

“May I sit?”

“Of course.”

She'll patch up your tapestry that I shred

They sat and laughed for hours as they waited for the train, and Luis walked her home in the snow. Her shoes were soaked through so he carried her the last few blocks, and he fell in love as she laughed, her eyes shining. 

And hold your hand while dancing

A year later, she wore the same gown as she had at the train station as they danced in her ballroom with the rest of their friends. After a while they found their way to her balcony overlooking her yard. 

Never leave you standing Crestfallen on the landing With champagne problems

“Want a drink?”

“No thank you, Luis.”

“I’ll be right back.”

“No, I’ll come with.”

Your mom's ring in your pocket

He never got the wine though, because once they were in the middle of the ballroom, he was kneeling in front of her with his mother’s ring on her finger. 

Her picture in your wallet

It might have been Vanessa who took the picture. Or maybe Cooper. They were never sure, but one copy was in his wallet and one was in her locket with their children until the day they died. 

And you won't remember all my Champagne problems

They were toasted with glasses of champagne, and for the first time he wasn’t hurt by the sight. Tonight was a night for celebration. Not for heartache. 

You won't remember all my Champagne problems

“I’m glad you didn’t marry Keely Luis my dear,” his mother told him at the wedding, the first time she was able to leave the house.

“Who?” Luis answered.

Notes:

It’s snowing idk why

They’re at Keely’s vacation house which is why Luis had to take a train back home

I hinted at it but Luis’s mom was sick when this happened, and better at the wedding

Also this was a mildly petty fic my goodness.

Also this happened in about eight different time frames/locations that I’ve woven into one fic: There’s Luis and Maeve at the train station, Keely and Luis at her house on the balcony overlooking the dancers, Luis talking to his brothers and sister in law, Luis and his friends at their dorm, Luis in the kitchen, Maeve and Luis on her balcony overlooking the yard, Maeve, Luis and friends in Maeve’s ballroom in her parents’ house, and then their wedding at the very end.

That wasn’t any clearer sorry

I hope you enjoyed!!!

[liberolove]

Testing the Waters (pt. 2)

Summary: youve finally graduated high school and now youre moving on to college. youve decided to go to sendai university. its summer and youve become curious about checking out the dating pool in miyagi, so you download a dating app. you figure you might as well have fun before delving too deep into your studies

Part: [part two] out of ???

Pairings: nishinoya x reader / kuroo x reader / oikawa x reader / kiyoko x reader

A/N: theres tons of ships here, just me living out my hoe phase lmao please dont judge me. let me know what yall think

Genre: fluff, smut, crack

Warnings: flirting, college shinanigans

It’s been three days since the last time you saw Yuu. Gosh, even saying his name to yourself gave you goosebumps. You two have been texting non stop and honestly, it felt so refreshing. You were a pretty bad texter but he knew how to keep the conversation going. 

One of his favorite things to do was play 21 questions with you. He wasn’t like those fuckboys who would use this opportunity to ask you if you were a virgin or what your favorite position was. Yuu was different. He came up with the craziest scenarios and judged you on the way you answered. One time he asked you how you would escape a 300 lb lion that just broke out of the zoo you were visiting. You honestly had no idea how to respond but eventually you replied, 

“I’d make sure to run with a crowd and ‘accidentally’ trip a slow runner so that the lion could get distracted and probably (most likely) attack them. This would buy me some time to get the hell out there.”

This response caught Noya off guard but he loved the way you thought. You continued to come up with barbaric schemes to survive all the scenarios he would throw at you. He kept you guessing and that was what you liked so much about him. He was wild and so were you.

You were getting a little impatient over your next date so you took a deep breath and eventually asked him.

Y/N: Heeey, Yuu. I was wondering when you’d like to go out again. I’d really like to go out with you again.

Nishinoya Yuu: hey cutie! I’ve been wanting to see you again but I haven’t had any days off from work lately.. (; ･`д･´) IM DYING!! I just wanna see yoouuuuu

Y: Aw man.. :( That sucks. When do you think you’ll get your next day off?

N: idk tbh but hopefully it’s soon!!

Y: no worries, just let me know.

N: will do!!

Well, that was that. Now you wondered what you should do to pass the time. You were bored again and needed something to do. “Oh wait. I should check the app. I haven’t checked since I messaged Yuu on there. Maybe I have more matches.”

You opened up the app and you had 10 notifications. You had gotten some likes on the selfie you posted and several people viewed your profile. You checked who looked at your profile, and it was mostly ugly, older, men. “Gross,” you thought to yourself. Besides this, you noticed some new messages. 

You opened up the first message. 

“Hey sexy! Wanna come see me play? Click my link https://…..”

“Damn bots. So annoying.” You deleted the message. Next message:

“DTF?”

“I mean like yeah, but you could’ve been less forward in your message. What a turn off..” You had one last notification left. Maybe it wouldn’t be a let down.

“Are you made of Fluorine, Iodine, and Neon? 'Cause you are F-I-Ne.”

To be honest, this pick up line did make you giggle a little. You checked out the profile of the mysterious stranger who sent it and you were surprised that it was a bulked up biker. And damn, was he hot as hell. 

His hair stood up in an organized, weird bed head kind of way. It made him look like a rooster. Rather than smile in his photos, he smirked. And his eyes looked like he could undress you solely with his gaze. He looked like your typical bad boy, but that didn’t make sense. Why would he use a chemistry pick up line?

This made you become even more interested, so you replied back with another cheesy pick up line.

Y/N: I wish I were adenine because then I could get paired with U.

Kuroo Tetsuro: Hey, kitten. I thought you’d never reply. You had me waiting.

Y: umm??? calling me kitten already?

K: What’s wrong? Are you flustered already? We haven’t even met up yet.

Y: woah there cowboy! hold your horses

K: I’m not a cowboy, but I’ll gladly have you ride me instead.

Y: skskskks i cant even-

K: Sorry. Too much?

Y: YES TOO MUCH

K: Alright. Let me start over. Ahh, a fellow chemist, I presume?

Y: yeaaah, kind of. I have a love/hate relationship with chemistry.

K: Is that so? Maybe I can help with that.

Y: oh really? how so?

K: I am a chemistry major after all. I go to Sendai. Do you go to school?

Y: uhhh i’m going to start there in the fall. I still haven’t decided what to major in, just yet.

K: Maybe you’ll end up being a chemistry major like me and I can give you private one on one lessons? 

Y: I highly doubt that, but nice try. 

K: Have you gotten a tour of the campus yet? Or are you waiting for freshman orientation?

Y: nah, I haven’t seen all of it yet. 

K: Would you like to?

Y: um sure! When are you free for my private tour? (:

K: How about tomorrow in the morning? Maybe around 9am? I can pick you up too if you’d like.

Y: Sounds good and no thanks. I’m not riding on that motorcycle! Looks scary :(

K: Don’t worry, kitten. I’ll drive safely and make sure nothing happens to you.

Y: there you go again.

K: Sorry, I couldn’t help myself. No, but really. I don’t mind picking you up. Have you ever been on a motorcycle before?

Y: nope

K: Then, let’s change that. Send me your address tomorrow morning. And get some rest.

Y: alrighty it’s a plan then!

K: No. It’s a date.

Y: sksksk omg

After that conversation, all you could think about was how the hell did you get into this mess? Motorcycles are dangerous, yet this rooster convinced you so easily to take a ride with him.. 

It was an understatement to say that you were nervous for tomorrow.

You set an alarm for 7 am the next day and went to bed.

Your alarm woke you up and you immediately remembered why you were awake so early. You rushed into the shower and once you were out, you spent 30 minutes deciding on what to wear. You opted for some black, ripped skinny jeans and a white v-neck t-shirt. 

At 8am on the dot, your phone’s notification bell went off. It was Kuroo.

“What’s your address, baby?”

You sent him the details and continued getting ready. You put on some light makeup and brushed your hair. You checked the time, and it was already 8:55 am. Then, your phone went off again.

“I’m outside.”

Your heart almost beat out of your chest. You grabbed your purse and put on some chapstick. You know, just in case..

You locked up your apartment and walked down the stairs. You were greeted by the biggest shit eating grin on the sexiest man you’d ever seen. You never went for the bad boys but college is a time for experimenting. 

“Hey, Y/N. You ready to ride? I brought an extra helmet for you.”

“Hi, Kuroo. And yeah, I guess,” your voice shook as you replied. You were really nervous but you tried to hide it.

“Don’t worry, baby. There’s nothing to be afraid of. I’ll keep you safe.”

His words made you melt and you had just met him. The way he cooed at you and looked your way made you blush. You felt your cheeks get hotter by the second.

“Alright. Hop on and hold on to my waist. Hold on tight or else you’re gonna fly away when I take off. Okay?”

“..okay..” you managed to mutter. You were shaking but you put on the helmet he gave you and lifted up your leg to sit on the metal machine. You slowly hugged Kuroo from behind and held on as tight as you could. Your head was smashed right up against his large, broad back.

“Ready?” he asked.

“..yeah,” you squeaked.

Before you finished saying this, he had taken off like the devil was chasing him. If this was his meaning of safe driving, you didn’t want to find out his meaning of reckless driving.

The ride to Sendai University only took about 5 minutes, when realistically it would take 20 minutes by bus. You arrived and Kuroo teased, “are you going to let go, kitty?”

You hadn’t realized you were still gripping onto him for dear life. You released him from your hold and your hands still tingled from the amount of force you applied to his shirt. “Sorry!”

“No worries. Hey, look! I brought you here alive. Aren’t you glad?” he cackled. 

His laugh sounded like a dying hyena but it did sound a little cute at the same time. “Yeah. Thank goodness. Your driving is insane, dude.”

He showed you all over campus, from the administrative buildings to the gymnasium, to the fields. Sendai was a pretty big campus, and it made you glad that you had a personal guide to show you all the different buildings. 

After your little tour was over, he asked, “wanna grab a bite to eat? I’ll be a gentleman and pay for you too.”

Of course, you couldn’t say no to food. Much less, FREE FOOD! You nodded and got ready to ride the devil’s machinery again.

He took you to a nearby sushi bar. “Order whatever you’d like, princess. Today, I want to spoil you rotten.”

You melted at his words and also at the variety of rolls on the menu. You didn’t ask him if he really meant that you could order anything. You just kind of went for it. You ordered everything from shrimp tempura, to octopus, to eel. Sushi was your favorite and being told that you could order everything was a dream come true.

“Damn, girl! I had no idea you had such a huge appetite!  I didn’t know you’d take me seriously on my offer. You’re gonna run my pockets dry.”

You blushed and looked away. “Sorry, Kuroo. I really couldn’t help myself. I love sushi so much.”

“I’m just teasing you, baby. You deserve to be treated like this everyday.”

You had no idea how to respond so you just kept stuffing your face with sushi.

After you finally had your fill, it was time to go home. It was getting late. Kuroo took you home and you were definitely more relaxed this time on the bike. 

“I hope you had a great time today, kitty. And I hope I met your standards.”

“Yes, I did! Thank you so much, Kuroo! This was honestly so much fun. Thanks for everything.”

“Of course. Nothing but the best for you. I just need one little favor from you, baby.”

“Oh? What is it?”

“Can I get a kiss from your soft lips? I know you want to. I saw the way you kept staring at me, today.”

“Oh.. uhh.. Y-yea-yeah. Sure, of course.. Yeah,” you stammered. 

You looked at him with soft, shy eyes and before you knew it, he leaned in quickly and kissed you on the lips. Your eyes were wide open in surprise but as he deepened the kiss, your eyes slowly shut.

The kiss felt like electricity coursing through your body. You didn’t know what it was, but this man definitely already had you wrapped around his long, slender finger. 

As soon as you realized his hold on you, he backed off, and left you wanting more. He was such a tease.

“I can’t just let you have everything today, kitten. I need you wanting more.”

You didn’t know what to respond so you looked down at the ground shyly. 

“I’ll message you later, y/n. Don’t make me wait too long, again.”

You waved and muttered, “Thank you, Kuroo.”

He revved up his bike and was gone in seconds.

You remained in a daze as you walked back up to your apartment. Once you got inside, you plopped down on your couch and released a long sigh. “Who knew that college was going to be so exciting..”

[link to kuroo pic i found]

[daisy--sorbet]

heyyy, hope you’re having a good night!! if you have the energy and feel okay answering, what’s up w taz graduation? i haven’t checked it out yet but i was thinking ab it. just asking bc you’re the first person i saw talk ab the show having serious issues, but also feel free to not answer this!! hope you have a good week!

i took a nice hot bath, had a strawberry kiwi capri-sun, and did a nice face mask and i’m feeling pretty good - so, y’know what anon? let’s talk about it. 

for anyone who likes taz grad who sees this post: it’ll be tagged with “taz grad hate” (although i feel hate is definitely a very strong word - it’s for the simplicity of tagging it) - so please block the tag if you don’t want to see this post (especially because i put a readmore on a post before and it didn’t show up on mobile and instead gave the full post). mobile tumblr has a tag blocking system, so please feel free to use it! i don’t mind haha

anyway, so this is... probably going to be a lost post, and i wanna go ahead and preface it: this absolutely isn’t any hate on the mcelroys themselves. i love the brothers and their dad a lot, and while i doubt any of them would ever see this (or have it sent to them, or shown to them, because im pretty sure they try to distance themselves from this sort of thing), i just want to make it clear that criticizing a product is different than bashing a person. which brings me to the point of if i do end up sounding as if im bashing someone - please call me out on it! it’s not my intention to target anyone.

with that said, let’s talk about this campaign.

so my problems are as thus: the railroading, the shipping (a fandom problem, but it’s present in the podcast), the NPCs, and some misc problems others have addressed better than i have.

which. i know. that’s basically the entire podcast. (i promise i’ll bring up some positive points to balance it all out). keep in mind i’ve only personally listened to... what, six episodes? and it was enough for me to drop it. some people dropped it first ep, some dropped it ep four, and others are still forcing themselves to listen.

the railroading

there was a time i could handle travis and his railroading [making sure the story goes exactly the way he has planned], because it was the very beginning of the podcast and that’s what you can kind of expect from a plot-heavy podcast. hell, i wouldn’t mind it if the interactions and goofs weren’t a huge part of why i listen to TAZ in particular (which, by the way, is why amnesty still stuck out to me - even if there was a direction griffin wanted to push them towards, the interactions between the players (or players and npcs) made up for any railroading). it’s kind of hard to not railroad a little when it’s story-heavy and you’re trying to built up a world that you’ve put a lot of thought into. however, a huge part of d&d is the spontaneity. 

it’s kind of why i think balance was so popular. while there was railroading towards the end, there was the presence of improv that made it all good. most mcelroy content is enjoyed because of the goofs. the magic brian moment is memorable. the jenkin’s fight still stands out because it was funny (albeit a result of some bad rolls). the boys teasing angus sticks out because the four would play well off of each other. even without that - griffin had talked about how he had to roll with things (the fact he had planned for a fight atop the train, but ditched the idea for what his family members came up with instead). even in amnesty, a couple moments that stick out to me still are ned with the jetpack taking out a pizza hut sign, and the scene with the water where jake was trapped inside. they aren’t as fun, but they still stand out as “things i didnt expect to really end the way they did.”

with grad, it’s just. one after another. the thundermen want to subpoena a xorn? cool, let’s run with that until actually the xorn gets fed rocks and goes home and who cares about the subpoena now. fitzroy wants to keep his cloak? lets talk about it for a while and you also get no rolls to even try to keep it. fitzroy goes to meet higglemas in his office? oh, why are you here fitzroy? im going to keep asking you until you answer fitzroy? you arent getting out of this scene until you answer me, fitzroy, so just tell me why you’re here already, alright, fitzroy? 

and even later in a episode i read a transcript of: hey argo, remember how you have this whole secret motivation? fuck you, im gonna talk about it here in your dream and reveal it to listeners and remove any tension you had building up, and you dont get a choice to talk about it because this all-knowing villain knows all about it :)

and even NOW in the latest episode, there’s a comment that “we should cap argo’s skills here” instead of just... making the checks higher. rogues are good at certain things and usually arent the best in battles. better hope argo never makes it to level 11, because who knows how people are gonna handle the fact that he gets a skill that’ll make it so certain skills can’t have a roll below 10 (reliable talent). 

(griffin, thankfully, calls travis out for that, but still - travis, why would you even imply that, considering you should be aware of how rogues work considering magnus multiclassed into rogue and you played one on tiny heist?)

and in the newest episode, their Big Bad chaos (which, god, i personally hate that name) straight-out says “dont do this” to the thundermen. travis tries to say, on twitter, “a character saying “dont do this” is different than me saying it” but i need to point out that it’s one thing if you’ve said “no” in character but worked with the PCs doing otherwise, but the railroading says differently.

the shipping

ill try to make this quick, because it’s nothing to do with the fandom (ship however you want, man) - but i really feel the need to draw attention to this.

fitzroy, as confirmed by griffin in a ttazz episode, is asexual. not aroace, but ace nonetheless. and i find it... troublesome that the idea of rainer and fitzroy having a relationship is still pushed nonetheless, despite the fact that fitzroy (to my knowledge) was never once shown to reciprocate any feelings. not to be that person, but i really hope that grad doesnt have any sort of romantic relationships in it (at least - not between NPCs and PCs unless they’re actually like... warranted?). 

i dont know, man. one of my closest friends is ace, and i know she wants a relationship, but i think it would reassure her a lot to see an ace character who isn’t pushed into one in case she ever changes her mind. someone once mentioned that they hope fi/tz/ra/in doesnt happen because theres relationships that have that “oh, you can just date” and it goes upwards there to “oh, you can have sex just to please them <3″  (which, to be honest, is kind of a gross mindset - if someone isnt interested, they arent interested).

also, uh, the TTAZZ where griffin states this, there’s kind of the mention tht the whole sexuality question was posed in relation to the episode “creative thinking” (the dream one i mentioned earlier) - which. uh. i don’t know if anyone caught this, but... rainer straight-up wrote fitzroy a letter in the dream like “are you going to accept my proposal? a girl doesn’t like to be left waiting” which. leaves me with some gross feelings because uh.

if... if the whole thing about fitzroys sexual orientation was addressed here, then why would you push your ship anyway? feels kinda iffy, man.

to which i want to say: fitzroy can date. he’s allowed to date. griffins allowed to do whatever he wants with his character. but when a lot of the flirting is met with nothing, i’m not gonna see the chemistry there. just because travis ships it doesn’t mean it’s canon.

the npcs

ah yes. lets talk about the npcs.

there’s... a lot. a lot a lot. i think travis trimmed down how many were present in a scene, but uh. there’s still a lot. and... uh... i kinda wish there wasn’t?

look, i know im going back to balance/amnesty, but just. hang in there for a moment. chill with me. vibe. 

balance didnt have too many NPCs present at all times in each mini-arc. gerblins had some big names like barry, klarg, gundren, killian, yeemick, and magic brian. rockport limited had angus, jess, graham the juicy wizard jenkins, and all of the tom bodetts mentioned. 

amnestys first arc had mama, barclay, jake, dani, pigeon, kirby, minerva, and that was about it for like. big names? and not all of them were present in each scene. 

in the first episode of grad alone: gary, hernandez, jimson, rolandus, zana, rhodes, buckminster eden, rainer, leon, tomas, hieronymous, higglemas, stuart, jackle, bartholomeus, mulligan, groundsy, germaine/victoria/rattles (the skeleton crew). and those are the ones i wrote down (minus groundsy, who i just. ignores. idk him).

like holy shit, my english prof got onto me for having too many characters in my first chapter and i didnt even have half the amount listed there! 

it’s just a huge cast. does this take place in a school? yes! theres bound to be a lot of students present - but you don’t have to name every single one of them, at least not in the first episode!

the miscellaneous

i don’t know if travis ever actually addressed it, but wheelchair users have actually like... said that rainer’s introduction bothered them, because she was like “please ask me abt my wheelchair :)” when travis saying she was in an ornate chair would have sufficed. 

uh. the colonization vibes people have discussed within the centaur arc. mentioned here, the replies here, and this post (and its replies) here as well.

the overall lack of d&d when the campaign was kind of advertised as a return to d&d if i remember correctly

also no one seems to be taking literally any criticism at all which like. ignoring the petty shit, sure, but people have stopped donating to taz and their listener-ship must have dropped some during this entire time - you’d think that maybe someone could say “we need to find out why people dont like the thing and fix the thing” consider this is. yknow. their livelihood.

anyway uhhh 

tl;dr: travis railroads way too much (even now), the shipping in-game has become pushy and gross (especially bc its shoving a relationship onto an asexual character), theres too many npcs that dont stand out well enough, and no ones taking any criticism about the major issues with grad. 

[foolgobi65]

careful man’s careless daughter

@philtstone prompted: Anne/Gilbert babysitter au fake dating prompt #5 let’s go laydees “you have the emotional capacity of a brick. that slate I broke over  your head.” (we’re pretending people still use slates now....american schools have no money...its possible ok) 

k so i was trying to figure out how to work in the babysitter + fake dating and ... like a flash the plot to this old telugu/tamil movie i love missamma/missaimaa came to mind -- its not quite the same because they’re two people pretending to be married so that they can make money as school teachers/live in tutors for a wealthy family’s daughter but it works just enough that i decided to roll with it lol. 

this technically isn’t the actual babysitting, nor the fake dating which I actually turned into a fake marriage lol, but i hope u still like it, even though it is all over the place and a general wreck because i wrote it straight through without any editing or thought towards pacing/characterization bc i havent written in forever lol!! im not even sure what the time period setting is lol, and i dont think my translating of the anne events into a semi modern day even works but w/e lol. 

u are the truest of friends, the light of my life, and have certainly heard more than your share of my mental breakdowns both in the last month and the last few years lol. u deserve all the good things, all the good fic, all the time. 

title is a perversion of a tswift lyric because it came up on youtube. if anyone wants to send in prompts from here

---

“You owe him how much?” 

Anne sighs, crossing her legs to hide how uncomfortable she is in this moment -- here she is in the park, fifteen thousand dollars plus interest in medical debt for Marilla’s eye surgery and being hounded by Roy Gardner, ex boyfriend apparently turned loan shark who was on his knees proclaiming both love and loan forgiveness should Anne just accept his proposal. 

Here Gilbert Blythe is, sitting on a park bench after two years without contact, watching the whole thing. 

“Marilla doesn’t have health insurance,” Anne says, eyes on the ground as she uses the toe of her shoe to grind a leaf into the sidewalk cement. “Even when I was teaching, the union plan didn’t let people add parents on as dependents.” She sighs. “With everything happening with the farm, she couldn’t afford to put money towards a plan and so when her eyes got bad....” 

For a moment, there is silence. Anne can almost hear Gilbert’s jaw clench “That’s just wrong.” 

Anne laughs, and because her eyes are averted she doesn’t see Gilbert flinch. “That’s America, Blythe.” 

“Well,” she hears him say, tone just dripping with what Mrs. Rachel would call the Blythe Stubbornness, “It shouldn’t be.” 

She won’t ever admit it, but there’s something Anne has always found deeply compelling about Gilbert when he gets into these moods -- all righteously indignant in a way that Anne feels inside of her own body. Or felt, before Matthew died and left behind debts not even Marilla had known about, and Marilla’s eyes worsened around the the time Anne was let go from her teaching job and even if she had had the job it wouldn’t have mattered, she knows, but still. Beautiful, wonderful, beloved Diana had offered to help, of course she had, but Anne knew that Fred’s business wasn’t yet where it should be and that the parents Barry were still unimpressed with their son in law to be’s financial acumen. So she’d had to go to Roy, who had of course lent his beautiful Anne the money, and of course had arranged for Marilla to be treated at the best hospital in Toronto, of course had set them up in the apartment of a friend of his right in downtown where the rents were a thousand maybe two per month. He’d popped the question for the third time the second Marilla had been released back into Anne’s care. 

Almost as if he can hear her thoughts, Gilbert speaks -- “Gardner shouldn’t be harassing you like this either. Who ever heard of charging interest on a loan to a friend? And what on earth does he think he’s going to take from you if you just don’t pay?” 

Anne burns. This, she hasn’t told Marilla, nor even her darling Diana. For some reason, it seems alright to tell Gilbert. “The farm,” she mumbles.

Gilbert snorts. “I’m sorry, I must have misheard. Are you saying that Roy Gardner, heir to one of the biggest fortunes in Boston and your ex boyfriend, took your home as collateral on a loan for money you needed to pay for your mother’s surgery?” 

Anne says nothing. She still hasn’t looked up at him, hasn’t been able to meet his gaze since she sat down on the bench and told Roy to get up off his knees and wait two months for either his money or her affirmative answer. She blinks, having mercifully forgotten that Gilbert was present for that last bit. She hopes he’s forgotten too. 

“And wait, before he left you said....” No such luck. “Anne!” Anne’s sure her entire head must be flame as she closes her eyes, bringing her knees up on the park bench and burying her face into her own lap. “Anne you said you’d marry him if you couldn’t get the money!” 

“There’s no debt between spouses,” Anne mumbles. “We’d get to keep the farm, and I wouldn’t ever worry about Marilla’s health again.” 

“But you don’t love him!” She doesn’t know if she’s ever heard Gilbert sound so scandalized. 

“I used to!” she tries to retort, but even Anne knows that her voice betrays her when she tries to speak this lie. “I used to think I was,” she amends, “and maybe that’s as close as I’m allowed to get -- he’s rich, handsome, he even loves me! What more could I ask for?” 

“Coercing you into marriage, demanding interest on money that we all know is just pocket change for someone like him...that’s not love,” Gilbert Blythe responds, with all that....that all-knowing Blytheness in his voice that Anne has hated since she was 13 years old and the new kid in a class of people who had always known each other just as easily as they had known themselves. “Love is selfless, Anne, strong and kind. It makes you better for giving away your heart, even if the one you love doesn’t give you theirs in return.” 

Gilbert Blythe, always acting as if he knows something Anne does not. He speaks as if he’s been in love, at some point over the years since he was last in Avonlea and for some reason Anne absolutely burns with that knowledge. Ooh she just hates him, now at 24 just as easily as she had at 13! 

“And what exactly is love worth if it means I just lose the farm trying to pay for Marilla’s surgery, and still have nothing for the next time she’s sick?” Suddenly Anne is on her feet, hands on her hips as she glares at Gilbert looking quite alarmed as he still sits on the bench. The words she has kept locked on the inside, too private to even be written in a diary, come pouring out in one big rush:

“Three of my four parents are already dead, Gilbert Blythe.” Her voice hitches, to her horror, her sudden fury vanishes as she has to blink away the tears she has kept at bay since she and Marilla buried Matthew. Damn Gilbert, for bringing this out of her as well. “I can’t...I couldn’t bear to lose anyone else.” Her lips thin, and with a breath, her voice steadies. “I don’t care what you, or anyone else thinks about my choices if it means that I can take care of Marilla.” 

Gilbert’s eyes have the sheen of his own tears when he stands, his own lips wobbling just slightly. “I...” he swallows. “Of course, Anne.” Something Anne recognizes as self hatred passes briefly over his face, but she doesn’t understand. “I wish I had money like Gardner to give you, I really do.”   

Anne gentles, even if something inside her twists to be the object of the long-old guilt mixed with pity, much less Gilbert Blythe. Since Matthew’s death, every person in Avonlea it seems has sat with Anne and Marilla and offered their deep condolences, their absolute shock at the pair’s financial state of affairs, how much they wish they could help but sadly cannot, what with the way the bank’s collapse has hit their own finances. Only families like the Gardners survive economic crashes with money to burn. 

“I wouldn’t have taken it even if you had,” she offers instead, shrugging casually. 

His eyes flash. “But you took Gardner’s?” 

“I thought he loved me!” Anne closes her eyes, somehow feeling her cheeks flush even deeper. This is why she’s avoided all mention of Gilbert Blythe so strenuously since high school graduation, because more than anyone else he is the one who drags out the words she is always learning to keep inside. Here he is, somehow pulling confessions Anne hadn’t even dreamed of telling Diana, confessions that make her seem small, and stupid, lost in a world so much more complicated and treacherous than she can handle all on her lonesome. 

Well, she thinks, in for a penny -- 

“I thought he loved me,” she says, “and that he had the money to spare. I didn’t realize...” She looks away again, so that she never has to see him react to her folly. 

“Oh Anne,” Gilbert says, for some reason so soft and stricken that Anne’s knees go weak with her sudden desire to fall to the ground and weep. “You deserve so much better.” 

And now she’s angry again. “What would you know about what I deserve?” Anne spits, “you haven’t even been home since you started med school!” Vaguely, Anne thinks that Gilbert hasn’t been home since she and Roy had gotten serious, serious enough for her to bring him to Green Gables and show him the place that had been her very first love. Coincidences can be so strange. 

“It doesn’t matter,” she says, glaring again at the ground. “None of this matters. I’m just going to go home” Anne clenches her jaw, knowing that when she gets back to Green Gables she will go into her room and play every excruciating part of this conversation back in her head, again and again until she throws up or passes out at dawn from sheer exhaustion. Maybe both, if she’s lucky. She leans back slightly and manages to turn around on her heels, a trick Gilbert Blythe had always pulled at school and had had girls thinking he was so cool.

She’s five minutes away from the park bench when suddenly she hears him call out her name. 

“Anne,” he shouts again much closer, bending at his waist to balance his hands at his knees as he pants. “God, it really has been two years since I was on the university football team.” 

Despite the roiling emotions of five minutes ago, Anne’s lips quirk. “I can’t imagine you all practiced very much to end up near the bottom of your league every year.” 

Gilbert’s eyes widen, and for some reason he flushes. Maybe he’s so out of shape that it’s from exertion? “I didn’t realize you kept up with my matches.”  Ah. Anne, it seems, will experience nothing else but one long sustained flush as long as she is in front of Gilbert Blythe. “You know,” she tries to say casually, “you hear things here and there. Diana told me the village gossip.” 

Gilbert opens his mouth, but then suddenly shakes his head, like a dog trying to dislodge water from its fur. “I have...” he frowns. “I have a proposition for you.”  Anne raises what she hopes is an elegant eyebrow. “Oh?” 

He grimaces. “There’s a boarding school, a Catholic one, that’s asking for teachers over the summer for a few of their select students who want to be coached for college admissions. Essays, standardized tests, everything. They’ve got heaps of money, and are willing to pay salaries up front. Plus, they cover all your expenses while you’re there!” 

Anne blinks, feeling the beginnings of hope gather as kindling at the very dredges of her heart. Once, both Anne and Gilbert had competed so well against each other that they had both gotten into Harvard. Then, Matthew had died, and Anne decided she could just as easily get a teaching degree at the state school and stay closer to Marilla too. Gilbert alone had had the distinction of being the first from Avonlea to reach such heights, and had reached even higher when he had been accepted again to Harvard Medical School. 

But at one point, both Anne and Gilbert had taken their SATs. They’d both written their application essays. They’d both gotten in. Anne, even, had been offered a full ride compared to Gilbert’s only partial scholarship, so there could even be an argument that of the two, Anne had been the one on top. 

And if nothing else, Anne is even better at teaching than she was at taking tests. 

“I’ll do it,” she says firmly. “Where and when do I need to report, and how much money are they offering?”  For a second, a bright, dazzling grin paints Gilbert’s face. “Really? Ten--” he coughs, “Twenty thousand.” Anne frowns. 

“Each?” It sounds like a dream come true. Five thousand more than Anne needs, and paid upfront. She could save the farm, and put away five thousand towards the farm’s debts. “That sounds....exorbitant.”  He nods, suddenly more confident. “Yep! Twenty thousand for sure.” He laughs. “I know Gardner was supposed to be slumming it at state school, but you really can’t be surprised at how much money rich people are willing to throw at a problem.” 

“The problem being...their children.”  Gilbert’s grin turns wicked. “The problem being their children’s SAT scores, and lack of compelling anecdote to base an admission’s essay on, yes.” 

Anne laughs, wicked in this moment as well. She wishes in this moment, fiercely, as she has many times over the last few years, that she had been able to go to university with Gilbert at her side -- as the friends they had slowly begun to be after years of one and two sided enmity, before time and distance had turned them into near strangers. She doesn’t regret staying back, not really, but there is a part of her that no one had ever understood half as well as Gilbert Blythe, who had, after the Harvard interest meeting, drawn and pinned up a schedule for practice SATs that took into account both his and Anne’s often conflicting life schedules. 

“What’s the catch,” she asks, grinning when Gilbert chokes “come on, Blythe, there’s always a catch with offers like this. Is it across from a waste manufacturing plant? Is the principal a pervert?” 

Slowly, Gilbert Blythe is turning red. “Ah,” he says, shuffling like he never did even when he was an errant schoolboy. “Well,” he says, and....is that his voice cracking? 

“Gilbert,” Anne says, trying to reassure him, “I grew up in the foster system, I can handle much worse than bad smells and pervert principals, I promise.” 

He frowns. “It’s not that,” he says slowly, “but basically they’re looking for two teachers, a man and a woman to manage the boys and the girls while the rest of the staff go on vacation.” 

Anne smiles, trying to ignore the jolt of her heart at the thought of an entire summer with Gilbert, studying like they used to but as friends. Her old dreams, finally coming true. “That’s perfect then, you take one job and I’ll take the other! It’ll be like old times, kind of.” 

He smiles faintly, as if, even after locking horns with the best and brightest at Harvard, Anne is still the person he wants to be trading barbs with over the heads of high school students for months on end. “I’d like nothing better, he says, except...” 

“Except?” 

Gilbert inhales. “ExceptTheSchoolWillOnlyHireAMarriedCoupleSoThatTheyDon’tHaveToWorryAboutOutofWedlockSexorTeachersHavingSexWithStudents.” All in a rush, and now Gilbert is the one who can’t apparently handle eye contact.

“What?” 

“The school,” Gilbert says to his shoes, “since it’s Catholic, and also since they’re lazy, only want a married couple so that they don’t have to have anyone watching to make sure the teachers aren’t having sex with the students. Or each other.” 

Anne blinks. “But we’re not married!” 

Gilbert grimaces, opening his mouth, but then just biting his lip. They could be, Anne thinks, only a tad hysterical. Only all of Avonlea was matching them up all the years of high school, and even the years after until she’d met Roy. It would be so easy to get a certificate. They could get a divorce by September, even annul their marriage since they definitely wouldn’t be having sex. 

Twenty thousand dollars. 

“So what you’re saying,” Anne says slowly, her lip curling of its own accord “is that after all that talk about what love is and isn’t, and telling me that I shouldn’t marry Roy for the money he’d give me, your blockheaded solution is instead, for me to marry you?” 

Gilbert looks up. “Well when you put it that way--”  Anne sees red, even as she already sees herself in one of her old white lace dresses, standing with Gilbert at the courtroom and signing. “Gilbert Blythe I don’t believe you! Sometimes, I think that you really do have all the emotional capacity of that slate I broke over your head!” 

“I know,” he says tone heavy with something so sad that Anne’s hearten softens a bit of its own accord. “But you really need the money, and I promise we’ll get a divorce by September.” He smiles, but there’s something bitter at the corners that Anne has never seen before -- she almost raises her hand to rub the strand of emotion off his lips. “And you’re not the only one who needs the money. Will you do it?” 

Twenty thousand dollars. The farm, Marilla, an end to the eternal pity of Avonlea. And also, a small part of her suggests, an opportunity to finally spend time with this new Gilbert Blythe who went off into the world and left her behind. 

She sighs. “I vote that you be the one to tell Mrs. Lynde.” 

[rainingspellforlove]

captivated.

Chanhee likes being alone. he likes to enjoy his me-time the most, even he had so many friends out there. sometimes he hangs out with his squad, but mostly he likes strolling the street alone while sips a coffee in the nearby cafe he found. he mostly spends his time alone or with his friends.  but everything changed when he met this guy. this very guy that he met in the club few months ago.

it’s the first time chanhee went to a club. it was because  his friends forcefully asked chanhee to come.  chanhee didn’t like crowds at all. he hates it so much. so he never to come to crowd place especially a club. that’s the first place that he didn’t want to go to so much. that day, chanhee (unwillingly) came with his friends. he just loved his friends and didn’t want breaking the friendship, so he decided to come. he just wears his usual shirt and jeans. while his friends totally went off like a fashion models. their friends basically are bunch of lovers. he had 4 friends and there’s 2 couple from it. first is younghoon and changmin and the second couple is kevin and jacob. that’s why he likes to go alone because he’s always left out when the 4 of them being such a lovey dovey. he’s really gonna puke if he stayed too long with them but their friends are so caring about chanhee. they would like to do anything for him to get a good catch. actually, that is the reason his friends bring chanhee to club. to get a hot guy. 

“i really hated this so much but i love you all sooo much, thats the reason i come today okay, dont get me wrong” chanhee said

“i promised you’ll get a hot snack today” kevin said enthusiastically

“hot my ass, lets just go there then back home quick”  

they arrived at the famous club in the center of the city where most of them wears expensive clothes and accessories. chanhee didn’t pay for this, younghoon paid it all. he’s extra rich so he’s willingly to pay for the five of them. changmin is the luckiest for sure. he got a hot and rich boy out there without even trying, because younghoon made a move first. 

chanhee felt he went to a wrong place moreover he wears just plain clothes. 

“wtf i just wear this... ugh bye i dont care, i just sit my ass of in the bar” 

 chanhee just went off leaving his friends who right now enjoying themselves out in the crowds. he looked at the menu but he’s like 

“the fuck i didn’t have that much money.. should i ask younghoon to pay or ugh but he already paid for this ughhhh” chanhee just blabbering himself with frustation until someone tall came approaching him in the bar

“what do you like? i buy it for you” he said it softly. 

chanhee seems a bit surprised by a approachment. he dressed casually with a black top shirt and black jeans also. this guy is tall, but not so tall as younghoon, maybe 2 cm lower. he had his raven black hair which it seems he styled it so good. he seems like an actor coming out from the tv. he had sharp-edged nose which made him looked even more like a celebrity. 

“o-oh no no it’s okay i didn’t feel like to drink tonight. i must go back sober because im sure my friends wont be sober at all later” chanhee got panicked a little by the coming of this real hot guy. so kevin is true? is it their plan afterall? 

“it’s okay, you can order some cocktails.”

“no it’s okay-”

then the tall guy ordered some cocktails for chanhee and for himself too. 

“it’s my treat because i need someone to talk to and you seem not interested, i guess?”

“uhm, thank you for the treat i guess.. i promise i’ll pay it soon-”

“no, there’s no need. it’s okay. it’s really okay”

“okay fine, thankyou anyway. and yes im not interested in this kind of amusement. it’s not amusing at all for me”

“so what kind of amusement you like to see mr? what should i call you?”

“chanhee. call me chanhee” chanhee finally looked at him. that tall guy sat beside him in the bar. chanhee can finally looked that guy’s feature even more clearly right now. 

“hi chanhee, im not weird person, so dont be scared okay, im just like you. bored with these kind of stuffs. im just dragged here along with my friends too.” he chuckled

“no i didnt think it that way, you seem like a good person. but i dont know it’s just my guts, hey you didn’t tell me your name yet”

“yes right, sorry. im juyeon. nice to meet you chanhee”

“of course nice to meet you too”

they talked for a while there while having their cocktails. somehow juyeon is fun to talk to even with his lame dad jokes. and juyeon is easily to be fooled. chanhee really likes to fool someone and laughing at them. they really having fun talking to each other like that. chanhee found they kinda had no ending convos between each other. juyeon just told him that he’s actually working as a new journalist, because he’s a fresh graduate and it stressed him out because there were so many tasks to do. and it turned out they are in the same age but juyeon graduated first because he entered the college one year early. after those fun and funny convos between each other, juyeon stated something.

“chanhee-ya, you looked so pretty today, i cant take my eyes off of you since you come today” he looked so serious and his eyes told him so. the way his black pearled eyes see chanhee thoroughly and softly. chanhee looked at him back. in his eyes. 

chanhee didn’t realize he’s been drowning into his eyes the whole time he had this long convo with juyeon. he rarely looked at someone’s eyes while having a not serious conversation, but today is different. juyeon’s eyes. the way his eyes looked at chanhee is a whole different. chanhee is captivated into them. he’s so lost into juyeon’s eyes. he admired those pretty and captivating eyes which made him forget that he’s right now in the least place he wants to go. but right now, he’s stuck here in someone’s eyes for some moments. he felt like there’s no one here in this shitty place, but he’s right here  with juyeon only. both of them alone. 

chanhee looked so flustered. and he started to blush withouth he even realized. 

“uhm- i- that’s so much blunt of you wow thank you i guess..”

“such a pretty boy doin here alone, im scared you’ll be get kidnapped or something while your friends out there,” then he moved closer to chanhee’s ear then he whispered

“there’s so many guys lookin at you lustfully if you didnt notice.. look at your surrounding”

chanhee didn’t realize it at all, there’s really some guys lookin at him with nasty look that he’s really gonna puke at them right now. 

“shit. i should go home i guess. that’s why this is the least place that i wanna come sigh, but wait how can i know youre not like them huh?”

“uhmm, you’ve been with me an hour, so i conclude youre comfortable with me”

“yes youre right...” then he looked at juyeon for a while, he really like a good boy with his fool-like smile but still handsome. and the eyes which can smile too. 

“lemme take you home can i?”

“ugh why? you have your friends right, and i got my friends too..”

“it feels like you didnt want to stay here longer right”

“how did you know though”

“it’s seen by your face you dummie cutie” he pinched chanhee’s left cheek softly. 

“uhm right.. we  just talked for 1 hour but why i feel like it’s already 2 hours... time really ticks longer here”

“go tell your friends then, i’ll take you home.” 

“how should i trust you, youre not like the nasty guys right there?”

“i promised i’ll drive you safe and sound without even do anything nasty to you. i promise please let me take you homee, im just wanna talk to you longer though. i kinda had so much fun talking to you and bonus you’re pretty”

“finee let me chat my friends first okay, then we can go”

“yes!”

he’s enthusiastically happy and he smiled like a puppy. chanhee for the countless times drown into his eyes again and he said this without even he realized.

“juyeon, did you know that you are so cute?” 

“ah- oops, it went off from my mind” chanhee said again

juyeon just smiled 

he moved closer to chanhee. he looked at chanhee’s eyes softly and took chanhee’s hand. he carressed it softly. then lookin at chanhee’s lil cross tattoo in his pinky and carressed it again. after that, juyeon just kissed chanhee’s knuckles one by one. 

“but you’re way more cuter.”

“i- i- o-okay.” 

chanhee flustered as hell and blushed like a tomato. he feels his ears hot like a pan. 

“lets go” juyeon dragged chanhee out from the club with his hand intertwining in chanhee’s.

juyeon brought his sport car with him today and chanhee will ride in there the expensive car. 

“oh my, it’s really your car? oh God you didnt look like a rich sugar daddy but you really are?”

“im not yet a sugar daddy, im still in my twenties, im just a hot man that you just met in the club” he teased

“okay whatever” 

then juyeon laughs and they both entered the car. 

“do you want to straight go home or?”

“i didnt feel asleep yet. do you want to go somewhere?”

“not really, but do you have a place to go in this hours?”

“uhm let me think, there’s a cafe near my house, it’s just a small cafe but it’s really cozy and-” chanhee didnt even finish but juyeon just smiled softly

“yes lets go there anywhere you want”

 “okay” 

 juyeon always looked at chanhee everytime there’s a traffic light. 

“stop looking at me like that, you seems like wanna eat me alive or what”

“sorry you’re just so pretty”

“stop telling me!!”

“why? it’s true though, you’re really beautiful, did i make you uncomfortable?sorry-”

“no no it’s just, i cant take compliments, cant you look at my ears that flushed red like a tomato right now?”

juyeon laughs and seems enjoying it so much

“you’re really pretty. really.”

“i even just wear this pair of not so expensive clothes, you still call me pretty?”

“uhm” he nods and smiled like a puppy again

“geez whatever you say” 

they drived along and arrived at the place. 

“it’s a cute place so thats why you like to come here. so cute people tend to go here”

“stopppp” 

juyeon laughs again and they both entered the cafe

the barista knew chanhee and actually it’s his childhood friend too. his name is sunwoo. and sunwoo looked so surprised seeing him with a new guy

“HYUNG WHO IS TH-!” he almost shouts

“shut up sunwoo or i kill you” chanhee said while glaring at him

“oh you know him?”  juyeon asked

“yes he’s just my annoying childhood friend that eventually lived around here too.” 

“oh, he’s not gonna into your lane right?”

“what?”

“so i will not have any rival to get into you”

“lee juyeon please stoppp” 

“okay i’ll stop for now idk later” juyeon just laughs

they sat in the side of the cafe while lookin at the street outside. 

“it’s my usual seat anyway if you dont mind we’ll sit here”

“anywhere you go princess” 

“geez stop it lee juyeon!” chanhee blushing again

juyeon enjoys chanhee being like this so much. 

they finally sit together in the side. they had their own world again, they talked so many things again even their TMIs. they had so much fun talkin to each other until they didnt realize their cups of coffee almost empty. 

“lee juyeon, i dont know you are just dumb or just being pure. it’s slightly the same!”

“it’s just good being pure, like it’s pure my thought that i pour in and it feels so genuine right? i like being pure, because it’s me, that’s my charm hahaha”

“i guess so, but don’t be so pure too much juyeon! you can be easily fooled!!”

“i will try hahaha”

they’re being quiet for a while to take a sip of their coffee. chanhee quietly looks at juyeon’s features again. his smile. his jawline. his sharp-edged nose. his eyes. then his lips. he almost imagined how it feels to place a chaste kiss to his lips. juyeon is beautiful. how can someone like juyeon being with him right now in here in his usual cafe. today is beautifully weird. but he loves it. it’s a whole new feeling. he never been feeling so light and joy like this before. even with his friends. it’s a new feeling. 

“i know youre staring chanhee”

“o-oh im-no- im not staring” he quickly looked aside to the window

“cute. i like how you’d been flustered.” he teased

chanhee felt his ears hot again. 

“dont tease me!”

“fine fine i’ll stop” juyeon chuckles

then chanhee quickly takes a sip again to his cup of caramel latte. chanhee suddenly said bluntly

“sunwoo had a boyfriend”

“hm oh? why suddenly-”

“there’s his boyfriend, the cashier boy. his name is haknyeon.”

“ah” he smiled so widely and chanhee knew he’s about to tease chanhee again

“stop saying anything okay, i just stated facts maybe you should know about this” chanhee didnt look at juyeon directly and just lookin at the window

“okay okay i know” juyeon just smiled again looking at the shy boy in front of him

“you know that im straightforward right?” juyeon suddenly said

“uhm yes so?”

“i’d really like to kiss you right now”

“uhm- s-sorry, w-what?”

“sorry i- it’s just my mind that slips out- i didnt mean to-”

“later okay, we can kiss but later” chanhee just smiled at juyeon and continue to sip his coffee while looking at his black pearled eyes who captivates him so deeply in the past hours they’ve been together. 

juyeon looked a bit flustered and suddenly he grabbed chanhee’s hand.

“lee juyeon- wait-”

chanhee cant finish his words and just followed juyeon along. chanhee got so confused and say goodbye to his friend sunwoo quickly. sunwoo mouthed 

“congrats hyung youre gonna get laid today!!” 

then chanhee just mouthed “fckk youu kim sunwoo!!” 

then chanhee really got dragged away from the cafe. 

“lee juyeon what’s wrong? why suddenly?”

“just get in” he seems serious but didnt express any emotions too. 

“o-okay”

then they both got in the car. 

they were being quiet for a while. juyeon started the engines but he didnt press the pedal yet.

“lee juyeon are you mad or-?”

“im not chanhee..”

“so why?” juyeon being silenced and then looked chanhee closely. his black pearled eyes lookin more clearly while looking directly in chanhee’s eyes. chanhee feels like he’s drowning and drowning again into his eyes. his captivated gaze. chanhee really been lost in these beautiful eyes of juyeon for these past hours and he didnt deny it. he really wants to go deeper into his eyes.

“can i kiss you?”

so chanhee nods softly after that. 

juyeon  leaned in as well as chanhee who moves closer to juyeon. juyeon really placed chaste kiss into chanhee’s lips. juyeon puts his wide palm around chanhee’s soft jaw and softly carressed chanhee’s cheek with his thumb. chanhee grips his jeans tightly while feeling a soft kiss in his slim cherry lips. juyeon kissed chanhee slowly, from chanhee’s bottom lips then decided to kiss it even more deeper. chanhee’s lips just move along with juyeon soft kiss toward his lips. chanhee really melts into juyeon’s. chanhee feels like he’s already get into juyeon. when they already a lil out of breath, juyeon pulls away and moves to place a kiss to chanhee’s corner of the lips. then moves along to kiss chanhee’s chin softly, moves along again and kissed chanhee’s fluffy cheek. chanhee feels like so much butterfly flying over in his stomach. he almost died because of tachycardia. juyeon still place a soft chaste kiss in chanhee’s face. he moves to chanhee’s eyes then his nose. and lastly his forehead. 

juyeon finished his long lasting kiss towards chanhee and they still few inch apart.

“you’re really beautiful. i do really mean it. it’s just few hours but why i already really like you. admit it, you kinda had a spell on me huh?” while carressing chanhee’s soft cheek with his big thumb. chanhee still blushed red. 

“i cant say anything for now or my heart’s gonna explode”

“cute.” juyeon smiled while looking at chanhee’s eyes. 

“lee juyeon. let me state this. we just knew each other for just few hours why did you make me like this?”

juyeon just chuckled and keep carressing chanhee’s cheek softly. then chanhee brings his hand to grab juyeon’s hand. 

“uhm-” chanhee tried to say something

“can i-” he stutters then try to look into juyeon’s black pearled eyes. 

“can i kiss you again?” chanhee finally looked at juyeon’s beautiful captivating eyes clearly

“no need to ask” juyeon smiled softly and started to lean in again

chanhee circled his arms into juyeon’s neck and they melted into each other. juyeon can feel chanhee’s caramel latte into his bitter lips of americano. they kissed so deeply until juyeon pulls away. then juyeon lifts chanhee’s small waist 

“juyeon what are you doing?”

“sit on my lap”

“w-what?”

“come” juyeon didnt let chanhee finish his words and just pulls chanhee into his lap softly. chanhee just moves along and he’s already in juyeon’s lap.

chanhee puts his both hands in juyeon’s shoulder.

“i-”

“ssh, im not gonna steal your virginity for now. not now. and not here. “

“okay but-”

juyeon just pulls chanhee’s waist closer and pulls chanhee’s face into his. juyeon can feel chanhee’s hot lips after kissing him too long. juyeon just kissed him so deeply again while hugging his tiny waist. chanhee grips juyeon’s shoulders harder while feeling the kiss. juyeon’s lips dominate chanhee’s and chanhee didnt mind at all. he moves along and just follow juyeon’s moves. 

it lasted for awhile after suddenly chanhee’s phone buzzed. 

chanhee pulled away suddenly and there’s 5 messages already. from kim sunwoo. 

“YAHH GET A ROOOM NOT IN FRONT OF MY CAFE PLEASE”

oops. chanhee just realized they both just been makin out in the parking lots in front of the cafe. 

“uhm- i think we should go- sunwoo just-”

“okay sweetie we can do it another time” juyeon said while carressing chanhee’s hair and kissed chanhee’s corner of the lips. 

“uhm right. uhm- do you mind if- uhm”

“uhm?” juyeon leaned in closer

chanhee still blushing red as hell. but he’s not himself right now he’s just gonna explode at anytime

“you can go to my house if you dont mind we can-”

“we can? what?” juyeon teased.

“uhm eish just drop me then in front of my house.” chanhee said frustatedly

then juyeon chuckled again and whispered to chanhee’s ear

“lets go home and continue our unfinished tasks” 

chanhee blushed red red so red. 

but then he just nods and go back to passenger seat quickly. 

juyeon finally press the gas pedal and started to drive. 

he began to drive to chanhee’s house to finish their uncomplete tasks ;)

- fin 

[kayyeffsee-blog]

Bangtan fics that I’ve read and liked (will get updated)

uhh, so the thing is that a lot of jikook fics will be in here, as it is my otp. But I have  also put in many others. Thank you!!! (this goes in descending order, so newer ones will come on top, and i still have a lot of older fics, they’ll come at the bottom) (all fic titles in italics are my ult favs and all ships in bold have their plot and are not just implied)

On Patrol  and  On Patrol - Season 2 : jikook, yoonseok, namjin, police au, LOVE this series, check it out!

summary: Officer Jeon has his eyes on Mr. Adorable.Officer Min has a strange neighbor he can't seem to keep out of his life.Captain Kim finds comfort in his son's homeroom teacher. Well, cops need some loving too, right?

A Gilded World : i cannot believe this fic aint down there, yoonjin, must read, chaebol au (i love them), ULT FAV, kdrama au, with vmin who has a tiny storyline too, and side namseok, rated E, 169k words, bros jinkook, READ IT, the fic that got me interested in yoonjin.

summary: Jeon Seokjin has exactly four weeks to stop the impending engagement of his younger brother, doomed to a loveless marriage. The only way to stop it is to make a better match, more advantageous, more lucrative for the Jeon family. It's impossible. It's his only option.Min Yoongi does not want, will never want, will never ever even consider, marriage. It's not in the cards. He's stubborn enough to achieve the total ban on marriage talks. Except maybe his grandmother is a little more stubborn than he is, and maybe she's determined to see him march down the aisle.The chaebol arranged marriage au that exactly one and a half people asked for.

baby, love me hard and hold me tight : jikook, ceo kook, tsundere-yet-not-so-tsundere min, lots of smut, dancer jimin. summary’s too long.

all the light we cannot see : yoonkook, spaceship au, tsundere yoongi, wow i read a lot of those, rated E, 109k words.

summary (part of it):  (when jeongguk finally gets his chance to sail the cosmos, it’s onboard the ship of an aggravating man named min yoongi. he thinks it’ll be extraordinarily dull—but the universe, and the legend of treasure planet, have other plans.)

note: another not so common yet not completely rare pair, i honestly love this fic so much.

nobody's like you  : jikook, college au, pissed jimin,dense kook, a cute fic, rated T, 20k words. 

summary: if you have a crush but you don't know you have a crush, is it really a crush? and other great philosophical debates with jeon jeongguk.

or, jeongguk kinda fucks up and jimin can only take so much.

흰 여름 ('White Summer') : yoonmin, non-au, lil angst, rated T, 24k words. 

summary: “Diversity,” Namjoon had said when he had explained the concept to them. “Learning to love yourself, no matter what.” “We already did that,” Yoongi had pointed out. “Literally the same title.” But Namjoon, when he looked at him, had seemed strangely bright and somber at the same time. “Not like this,” he had said.Or, Jimin and Yoongi have to kiss for an MV. And deal with the fallout.

7 Minutes in Heaven : yoonmin, highschool au, fluff, mutual pining, rated T, 8.4k words, too long a summary.

♛ Chrysoprase ♛ : vmin, abo but with a twist, aristocracy au, ongoing, a piece written beautifully, rated E, 39k words, rich tae and poor min.

summary (partial):  Taehyung is a rich boy who gets captivated by a trapeze act from an unknown Omega at a theater show sending him on a ride of emotions--and ruts. 

   Mono No Aware : jikook, rated E, 104k words, divorce au, model agency au, summary’s too long.

Cotton Candy  : highschool au, yoonmin, highscool band au, another GREAT fic, set in the 90s, 240k words, rated E.

summary (partial):  As spring turns into summer, school band Cotton Candy unexpectedly loses its singer and the members are forced to look for a new vocalist. Six boys find one in the form of the promiscuous pink haired boy Park Jimin who makes a home in their hearts and finally finds a place he belongs.

Beta Tau Sigma : come FIGHT me, but this IS a classic, frat au, i scrolled through this long ass post twice, i cant believe its not down there, namjin, you need an ao3 acc to read this, anyways i suggest you to make one, crack, 123k words, rated M, shenanigans, side yoonmin with a tiny storyline, FAV. 

Before This Christmas : taegi, non au, amnesia, a great fic, rated T, 8k words, summary’s too long.

black versus blue : taekook, soulmate au, a LOT of angst, i LOVE this fic, hurt/comfort, dr tae, side yoonmin and namjin, rated E, 41k words.

summary: Taehyung had always dreaded meeting his soulmate, unlike the rest of the world’s population. He always hid the words scrawled in black cursive on the inside of his right wrist and felt terror at the thought of them turning blue, of his soulmate speaking them.

And as he sprinted down the packed Seoul sidewalk, hot tears streaming down his cheeks and sobs choking his throat, he knew he'd been right.

Or was he?

sick boy : vmin, LOTS of homophobia, fluff and angst, dystopian korea, its a really good fic, rated M, 8k words, side namkook and yoonseok.

summary: Jimin has always lived in a society where pride was held higher than anything else. His kind nature is unwelcome, and he spends most of his life alone.

Taehyung is the boy who dyes his hair every week, is too eccentric for his own good and is, most importantly, not like the rest of the town that they live in.

Look out the window, do you see love? : jikook, I LOVE THIS, kidnapping au, ceo kook, college student min, tsundere kook, heavy smut and drama, rated E, 100k words, summary too long.

a blessed touch, skin deep : yoonjin, slightly platonic, oneshot, fluff, massage au, but not the smutty kind, rated G, 3k words.

summary: Hoseok recommends his favorite masseur to Yoongi.

Yoonjin Massage AU, with side Hoseok/Jimin and Taehyung/Jungkook

the heart of a siren : jikook, pirates au, angst, enemies to lovers,rated E, 92k words.

summary:  Beware of what you take from the sea. She is not a treasure to be plundered, but a dark, vast void that will swallow you up and think nothing of it.

The Collabofornication : yoonmin, idol au, rapper au, lots of smut, 32k words, enemies to lovers, rated E, 32k words, summary’s too long, really good.

teeter totter : jihope, such a cute fic, 5+1, i love this one, neighbours au, 5k words, rated T.

summary:  five times jimin accidentally stumbles into his neighbour and the one time it’s very much on purpose.

Take Care : a short jikook, accident au, angst and fluff, rated G, 2k words, college au.

summary:  Roommates Jungkook and Jimin are in the midst of a friendship rift until an accident brings them together again.

Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo : yoonmin, rated T, royal au, 34k words, cute, i really like this twist on classics kinda thing.

summary: Everyone (including Taehyung, Jimin's best friend) could only talk about the ball the royal family was going to give in honor of the princes. Every single one was thinking and worrying about which clothes they should wear and how to impress the two, very single, princes. Jimin? He could only think about the new regular, who had a sweet tooth and the cutest smile he had ever seen.

The Universe Has Moved For Us, Without Missing A Single Thing : minjoon, such a feel good fic, tsundere min, canon, with a bit of yoonjin, so good, rated M, 14k words.

summary: Jimin is tasked to create his next comeback with his least favourite producer at BIGHIT, RM.

He is petty and bitter from day one.

Or, is he just really bad at feelings?

yesteryear's charms : jikook, hp au, a lot of fun, enemies to lovers (if you dont know, im a sucker for this particular trope), rated M, 18k words.

summary: After losing a bet, Jimin has to perform the Jingle Bell Rock routine from the iconic Muggle film, Mean Girls, at Hogwarts' annual talent show, dressed in red pleather and black knee-high boots. He receives a bigger reaction from certain people (read: ult rival Jeon Jeongguk) than expected.

a dose of salt : jikook, I LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS FIC, with a lot of taejin, doctors au, enemies to lovers, pls check it, its great, rated E, 145k words, ongoing, almost finished.

summary: Park Jimin is a renown cardiothoracic surgeon—a genius, a medical prodigy, the best surgeon at the hospital. He’s kind, friendly, handsome, and patient. He’s also the son of the hospital’s Chairman. But nobody needs to know that since he’s worked for and earned everything he’s accomplished on his own without the help of nepotism.Everyone loves him. 

Everyone but Jeon Jungkook, the hot new military trauma surgeon straight out of the army. The decorated veteran is brilliant and quick witted, but has a hot temper and absolutely zero tolerance for bullshit.

When Park Jimin makes a bad first impression on him, things get extremely salty between the two very different personalities.

playing with fire : vmin, ONE OF MY ULT FAVS, rated T, 30k words, college au, drama actor v, dancer min, enemies to lovers, SO GOOD, laser tag.

summary:  Despite never seeing eye to eye on things, Taehyung and Jimin find that they have more in common than expected through a game of laser tag, a play and a dance competition.

At 4 O'clock, I'll Stay : vmin, footballer (soccer) v, bar owner min, enemies to lovers, a good fic, grumpy min, rated E, 35.8k words.

summary (part of it):  the one where Taehyung goes to Jimin's bar to talk bad about his latest soccer matches and Jimin waters down his drinks by "accident."

Happy Ending : namseok, implied OT7, massage au, rated M, smut, 2.3k words.

Rose Quartz and Pink Opal : such a good fic, i love this, if its down there im sorry just tell me in the comments, jikook, rated T, 21.4k words.

summary:  “Everyone is born with either 1 or 2 small powers. If 1, then your soulmate has the other. They will swap the first time you see each other, and you will obtain both when you fall in love. If born with 2, you have no soulmate.”

tell me how to make this better : hurt/comfort, angst, vmin, non au, such a good fic, go check it, summary’s too long, rated T, 44.6k words.

loverboy : vminkook, a masterpiece, manipulation, assasin au, powers au, rated M, 9.7k words.

summary:  this much jimin’s figured out: sometimes, somehow, his words make people fall in love with him.

Never Judge a Book by its Cover : jikook, rated M, library au, 25k words

summary: Thanks to Jungkook's idiot best friend, he drowned the books he borrowed from the library. Now, he has to work there to work off his debt. He doesn't really like the job but that one boy that always has his nose burried in his books makes his days much better.Or in which Jungkook meets bookworm Jimin and falls harder than he thought he would.

note: squeelll, I love this fic!

we've got chemistree : jikook, rated T, 19k words, fake dating au. (can’t put summary bc its too long)

note: I love love love it. do check it out.

The Pink Envelope : yoonmin, no ratings, 12k words, highschool au.

summary: to a prompt I received on tumblr "Oh shit, sorry I got the wrong locker" When Jimin is sending love letters to his crush via locker but fails because it is Yoongi's locker.au where 6 of them are highschool students (Jin has already graduated)... and Jungkook is also in highschool with the rest of them (please don't ask me why I just want him to be there hahahaha)

note: cute and fluffy.

Him : jikook, rated M, 35k words, college au, dancer!jimin au.

summary: 'And like the dawn, you woke the world inside of me You were the brightest shade of sun when I saw you' or “I mean a muse,” explained Yoongi, eyes traveling to Hoseok. “Someone that makes you feelthe shots. Not only take them.”Jeongguk snorted. “You’re just whipped.”“Maybe,” agreed Yoongi, winking. “But it works.”

note: touched my feels, lovely.

Nu ABO: A Memoir by Park Jimin : jikook, rated E, 34k words, non au, a/b/o au.

summary:  The world didn't think it was necessary to give him a guide when it shoved all of these omega hormones at him, so here it is, Park Jimin's handbook on dealing with heats, unrequited love, and Jeon Jungkook.

note: amazing! Omega jimin dont wanna be an omega, and tries really hard to be an alpha. easily one of my faves.

Blackjack : yoonseok, vmin, namjin, chat fic, game fic, slightly creepy but light hearted, happy ending, not your ordinary chat fic, LOVE this, puzzles, mystery, rated T, 78k words, summary too long.

Fake Sugar : jinkook, rated E, non-tropey sugar daddy au, competitive eater jin, rich jungkook, fake sugar daddy, 87k words.

summary: im sorry, its too long. but ill put part of it.

(Hedge Fund wunderkind and Certified Awkward Gay Jungkook needs a sugar baby to show off at work, and Professional Competitive Eater and Objectively Beautiful Human Jin just wants to stop working shitty side-jobs. Fake Sugar Daddy AU. A trope and a half.)

note: a rare pair fic. (that rhymes, lol) i love the author, i have read all of his fics, i think. 

Worldwide Lonesome : yoonjin, rated E, 39k words, non au.

summary:  After the BBMA, Yoongi starts bringing guys back to the house.

note: i honestly love this ship and fic, it talks a lot about how closeted jin is and this fic has a great characterization for jin.

 Pause, Rewind, Play: jikook, non au, rated G, 3k words.

summary:  Jimin doesn’t know why it starts. Maybe it’s the eightieth post he’s seen today about him being rejected by Jungkook. But whatever the reason, Jimin starts to not care anymore.

note: loovve it, short and really good.

The Boy in the Music Box : yoonmin, mystical au i guess?, college au, rated T, 52k words.

summary: Yoongi doesn’t really expect anything special when he finds an old music box in his grandmother’s attic and she tells him to keep it. Oh sure, he expects the music box to be a pretty decoration to add to the stale interior of his small apartment. He expects it to play a tune and he might even dare to expect the barely-functioning little ballerina to dance along to the soft chimes, but that's it, really.The last thing he expects is for the little ballerina to take human form at night and throw his life out of balance with radiant smiles, soft giggles, and a heart-wrenching story.

note: another author i absolutely love, this fic is amazing. its one of the only fluffy ones that has made me weep! do check it out

pick me up, buttercup : taekook, soulmate au, crack au, 9k words, rated G.

summary: AU where your soulmate's first words to you will be tattooed on your wrist when you meet. Which freakin sucks, because Jungkook's forearm will now forever read "Hey baby, if you were a booger, I'd pick you first."What the fuck, universe.

note: a very light fic, i love it so much. its really really good.

Cherry Tree : yoonmin, hanahaki au, angsty, rated T, 10k words.

summary: Yoongi always thought that Jimin looked like a cherry blossom, like Spring had manifested itself in the form of a human.Now he knows for sure.

note: really good, not a tragic ending i swear.

good game, well played : vmin, library au, college au, rated G, 23k words.

summary:  AN EXCERPT FROM PARK JIMIN'S PLANNER (ft. Jeon Jeongguk) -grammar reading :( -get pasta -buy the nice guy from the library ❤MY BIG GAY CRUSH❤ coffee

note: super good, college aus are one of my favs.

fairy brat : yoonmin, 3k words, rated T, supernatural au.

sumary: “I don’t know if you know but,” Namjoon says, “Hoseok’s roommate is a little… difficult. Yoongi hyung is a good guy, though, I promise.”“Anyone who lives with Hoseok hyung can’t be that bad,” Jimin says.Jimin could not be more wrong.

note: tsundere yoongi, really good!

The Perfect Japchae : yoonjin, 19k words, rated T, neighbours/college au.

summary:  In the eight months he’d lived here, neither of them had done more than nod in greeting when they passed in the hallway. Most of the time he just ignored Kim Seokjin and went about his own business while inwardly seething. A little voice deep down questioned why, exactly, he was so pissed all the time whenever he thought about his neighbour… but Min Yoongi really didn’t have an answer.

note: i love this pairing, such a good fic!!!

aye, love (you led me to a miracle) : yoonjin, rated T, 6k words, Cafe AU, tsundere yoongi.

summary: It’s six in the morning and all Yoongi wants is some fucking coffee.(Not to be, not to be assaulted with a possibly illegal stare and a smile that could probably bring dead flowers back to life, god dammit)

note: such an amount of fluff, i love it.

I need you boy (you're beautiful) : jikook, chat fic, rated T, 18k words.

summary: (part of it)

t h e d e s t r o y e r: jimin who is ur future husband

ChimChimz: ok so like

ChimChimz: here’s the thingy

00ngi: omfg you don't even know who he is

ChimChimz: uM

note: love it, really good.

to be with you : jikook, rated T, non au, 4k words.

summary: 5 times jungkook tries (and fails) to confess to jimin and the 1 time he succeeds.

note: really cute fic, but i think ill not put notes on all fics now, im getting fed up

A Wish Your Heart Makes : kook/everyone, polyyy, smut, another venturing into newer waters fic, rated E, 16.6k words.

summary: "This can't be the right translation," Taehyung says, before Jungkook can do something crazy like just ask to suck Jimin's dick. Taehyung has his phone out, and is frowning as he taps the screen. "But I looked it up on Naver, and there might be something called sex pollen? Sex pollen? Like, plants?"

gladly beyond : jikook, 21k words, rated M, enemies to lovers fic, sports fic.

summary: too long, but jimin sees the tattoo of his “enemy” at a strip club.

note: another trope i love :)

Riptide : jikook, i actually visited this 10 times?!?, rated M, non au, 62k words, rated M.

summary (part of it):  A three year story [2013-2016] of coming together, breaking apart, and putting each other back together again. Jeon Jungkook learns about change, growing up, and the hardships of falling in love with a friend.

note: really love it

Hey, Baby, I've Got My Ion You : jikook, chem au, bad puns, rated T, 4k words.

summary: 

everyone: fvck the maknae jimin: i'm trying - (aka: chem au where jeongguk jumps two grades and becomes jimin’s lab partner and maybe a little more than that.)

note: copper tellurium (loll)

honest you do : jikook, idol au, reality show au, 26k words, rated T.

summary: “Do you think you’ll be a good husband?” Jimin smiles. “I’ll really, really try.” 

Korea's darling, Park Jimin, gets married.

note: a great fic, honestly.

In the Line of Fire : jikook, are you even here?, if so ty, frat au, 11k words, rated E.

summary:  For some reason, Jimin was everyone's favorite target.

A truth universally aknowledged : yoonmin, college au, rated T, 6k words.

summary: "It is a truth universally aknowledged that Park Jimin has the most wanted ass out of the whole college."AKA 5 times that Jimin gets asked out and Min Yoongi butts in + 1 time where the tables are turned.

Unrequited : yoonjin, taejin, hanahaki au, rated T, 3k words, not a happy ending.

summary: The Hanahaki Disease is an illness born from one-sided love, where the patient throws up and coughs of flower petals when they suffer from one-sided love. The infection can be removed through surgery, but the feelings disappear along with the petals. It can be cured without side effects only when the feelings are returned. 

Seokjin starts coughing up crimson-red rose petals.

pulling shapes just for your eyes : taekook, reality show au, rated E, really good (i cant be bothered to make a note lol), 110k words, a lot of sex.

summary: The number one rule when you're a producer on a show like Miss Right, Taehyung thinks, should be do not fall for the bachelor. It's such a shame Taehyung has never been good at following rules.

ringa linga : fluff, yoonmin, one-shot, best man au, rated G, 3k words, crack.

summary: Best man Yoongi needs to pick up the rings for his best friends' wedding. The problem? The clerk won't hand them over.

Enter lifesaver and fake-fiancé, Jimin.

note: light-hearted, really fun.

Heart of War : namjin, 173k words, royalty au, really frickin good, ongoing, rated M.

summary: For the protection of his people, Prince Seokjin has to marry his fiancé’s killer: the alpha king of the most ruthless and feared kingdom in all the lands with a reputation of being a cold blooded monster on the battlefield.

Worst of all, the omega prince doesn't even speak their language.

my heart flutters from the sugar high : taegi, I LOVE THIS FIC IT’S SO GOOOD, <cough> 5.9k words, rated M, canon compliant, crack, every so slighty tropey, just a teeennyy bit, fake dating au.

summary:  Yoongi and Taehyung sneak around together, cheating on their diets. The group? They've drawn different conclusions.

Seeking Alpha : jikook, I love this author, 17k words, rated M, a/b/o fic, but not the wolfy (lol) kind, i guess you could say ‘in a modern setting’, cracky.

summary:  It was meant to be a “fuck you” to the dating world as Jimin knew it. He was done with dating, fed up with alphas, so he put a message out to the world to say so. How could he have guessed the sweetest alpha ever would respond to it just to prove him wrong?

The Jeon Pack : jikook, a/b/o dynamics, THE BEST abo fic you’ll ever read, 70k words, rated E, the wolfy kind (heh)

summary: Jungkook's pack had survived centuries in the cold unforgiving forest. They followed strict traditions and laws to ensure their survival against nature and rival packs. Soon the responsibility of leading the pack would fall on his shoulders but before assuming the position of head alpha, he needed to choose an omega mate.

The problem was that Jungkook was in love with an omega that hated his guts.

浮世 U K I Y O : yoonmin, i’m pretty sure you’ve read house of cards and songbird and the sea??, this one goes in the same category, a breed of those two classics, Mafia au, rated E, almost complete, 366.9k words, oh and btw if you haven’t the above two ill link them right below.

summary: “Is that what they say about me? I'm stuff of nightmares?” “You own a city and you painted it with your colors,” Jimin says, his voice is quiet and his scent subdued. “Why wouldn't people have nightmares about you? You are scary.” “Are you scared of me?”Yoongi owns a city that he painted red until a man that doesn't seem to truly exist steals something from him. And all the strings lead to Jimin, a succubus who works in one of his brothels.

House of Cards : the LEGENDARY fic, vminkook, gets you right in the feels, dont waste your time here go read it, 394k words, rated E, mafia au.

summary: Jungkook is the heir to a mob empire, the most notorious in the whole of Seoul. Taehyung is a rookie sent in to infiltrate by his select team and bring the empire crumbling down."You knew the game and played it, it kills to know that you have been defeated."

The Songbird and the Sea : AGGHHHH, THIS IS THE BEST FIC EVERRR, made me love pirates, yoonmin, just read it, 255k words, pirate au, rated M.

summary: (wayy too long, go read it!!!)

time slip : jikook, rated T, alternate canon, 29k words, time-related fic

summary:  Jimin wakes up in the year 2017, which is very strange, considering the fact that last he checked it was 2013.

note: a great canon fic

A Glass of Water : jikook, but namjoon pov, a fresh fic (others aint rotten mind you), 8k words, rated T, college au.

summary: Namjoon is maybe a little over protective of Jimin and takes it upon himself to find out the identity of his new boyfriend. The others are absolutely no help.

Or, Jungkook and Jimin are dating and everyone knows except Namjoon.

You Broke My Heart (but I broke it myself) : jikook (haven’t you gotten fed up yet XD), anggstty, 19k words, rated M, alternate au.

summary:  Jimin's fiancé has abandoned him on his wedding day, and Jeon Jungkook, Jimin's first love and worst heartbreak, is back.

You Don't Bring Me Flour : short jikook, fluff and crack, college au, rated G.

summary:  In order to graduate, Park Jimin must convince cute grocery cashier Jeon Jungkook that this sack of flour is his beloved child.

Shooting Stars and Silver Moons : vmin, rated E, 20k words, fake-dating jikook, college au, bff fic.

summary: Yoongi and Jimin make a bet, Taehyung makes bad decisions.

(Or: "I'm kind of pissed you didn't choose me to fake date, I'm your best friend")

blindside : namhope, namseok, blind date au, rated T, i love this fic so much, 12k words.

summary:  Hoseok finally somewhat has a date. A blind date, but a date nonetheless.

The Shaman and the Exorcist : namjin, spiritual au, ghost au, but not the scary kind, college au, cracky, rated M, 145k words, apparently i visited this fic 21 TIMES (gasspp), i LOOVEE this too

summary: (too long)

in your eyes (it's where i wanna be) : yoonmin, tooth rotting fluff, rated T, 5k words, college au.

summary: Jimin pauses with his marker inches away from the cup, because — is he really going to do this? Isn’t it a bit old-fashioned to write something flirty on a coffee cup? But no matter what his churning gut says about danger and what the hell are you doing do you want to die, this guy is — with no better way to put it — totally Jimin’s Type with a capital T.

(Or: Jimin accidentally starts a nickname war with the cute blonde who likes his coffee way too bitter.)

i'll stick to you like glue-cose : jikook, rated T, 7k words, enemies-to-lovers kinda, really good.

summary:  Jimin merely wanted to study in peace, yet a certain five-foot ten frat boy - unfortunately also a past hook up - that epitomizes the very definition of smugness in one entire body whose ego is as big and full-scaled as the national debt, won't let him.

you're only brave in the moonlight : smuutt, bff au, vmin, college au, rated E, 14k words.

summary: There are reasons, very specific reasons that justify why—in three years of being hopelessly pathetically in love with his best friend—Jimin has not said a single word. Certainly hasn’t made a single move or attempt at a pass.But when it comes down to it, three years is a long time. A very long time.So when Jimin’s dam breaks, it breaks hard.(Or, Jimin asks Taehyung for help with taking photographs.)

(it's a paradise) it's a war zone : jikook, vacation au, really cute, enemies to lovers, rated T, 7k words.

summary:  murphy's law states that "anything that can go wrong will go wrong." jimin could maybe make peace with that if it didn't mean sharing a room and a bed with jeon jeongguk, the thorn in his side, for the entirety of his vacation.

once upon a timeshare : jikook, ex fic, rom com style, cute AF, 32k words, rated E.

summary:  Jungkook is in desperate need of a vacation, but spending two weeks in Namjoon and Hoseok’s timeshare in Okinawa with his recently separated ex of three years was probably (definitely) not what he had in mind.

Tie Me Down : taegi, lovvveee this fic, really fun, has drama elements to it, rated M, college au, 24k words.

summary: “I’ve just woken up with a fucking splitting headache, to find myself fucking taped to an office chair in a fucking living room that smells like unwashed socks and takeaway food. How am I? How do you think I fucking am?” “Wow. That’s a lot of f-bombs you’re dropping. Did anyone tell you that you need a healthy dose of positivity?” 

In which Yoongi’s life is a parody of Taken and Taehyung is just trying his goddamn hardest not to get arrested.

a sugar coated pill and a pick me up : soccer dad fic!!! namjin, kids taekook, rated T, really good, rated T, 25k words.

summary (only a part):  namjin are soccer dads who fall in luv

shōnen-ai love you : one of the most fun and cute (read: fluff) fics, vmin, rated T, manga fic, high school fic, 4k words.

summary: "What if I woo him with what he likes?" Jungkook frowns. "Knowing you, it's going to be a disaster." "I'm in pursuit of Park Jimin," Taehyung tells them dramatically, just as the bell rings and the teacher starts writing the first question on the board. "I'll do anything."

Doing anything means, apparently, studying BL manga.

My Cup of Tea : cute and short, minjoon, 6k words, high school fic, milk tea (lol) fic.

summary: One of Taehyung's many admirers tries to woo him by bringing him milk tea every day but Taehyung is lactose intolerant so it's always Jimin who drinks it.

From a distance away, the admirer watches.

Pastel : POLLYY, not really my cup of tea but i wanted to explore you know, jungkook/everyone, i liked it kinda, bdsm, baby kook, daddy kink, rated E, 188k words, bottom jk.

summary: Jeongguk learns the age-old lesson that you can't run from who you are, or who you like, for that matter.

There are a LOT of fics left, I’ll slow update.

[edge-lorde]

hp update: its been a long time, boys. ud think that with this plague outbreak id have more time for shitty phone games, and ud be right! however, the time i normally might use to make tumblr posts has been taken up by reading lotr orc fanfiction non-stop for at least 1 full month. id still be in the thick of that obsession even now if only the fics would update. that is how i find you today folks, for the first time in many weeks i am staring at a screen with nothing to do. so come with me friends, theres no better way to fill the soulless void we are all in than reading a nice long tumbler post. 

disclaimer, first of all, a lot has happened, i prefer to keep these updates as plot spoiler free as possible but do to extenuating circumstances i feel like it is necessary to say, [SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER BELOW]

that rowan fucking died,

i wont say exactly how, but i will say that her death was animated as were animations of myself and a few others reacting to our friend fresh corpse. obviously meant to be serious moments but the animations made it seem almost comical. 

i saw at least one post going around right after this update that was like ‘how could the game devs do this to us..... how could they hate rowan so.... this is punishment from on high’ and its like.... u guys do know what a story is right? the events of  a story are not typically done to punish less faithful fans, im pretty sure they were planning to kill rowan off from the beginning. this isnt disney im pretty sure the writers are not writing each chapter the night before its released by popular vote. 

that little “are we drifting away..?” scene with rowan makes more sense now. there was a bit in one of the scenes where the kids all reminisce on rowans life and the mc talks about it being the last real one on one time they had with rowan. a nice bitter sweet moment. i dont hate this turn of events. its a good reminder that actions have consequences and we are way past they days of “should i wear a hat or scarf?” its YA time now. 

i did manage to take 1 screenshot from this time, i had commented that before that when rowan said she didnt have many friedns that barnaby seemed to be hanging out with her without be there as a friend buffer and here was his reaction to her death:

;_;

the funniest part in all of this however, was of course cedericks reaction to rowans death “but she was so young....” LOL fuckin RIP.

lets see... what else.... i forget a lot of what happened but i think there was a time sensitive quidditch event in there somewhere? if so i  dont remember it. what i do remember of the quidditch pals is that im gonna play beater now, skye is being weird and cagey about it, andre is involved.... the others are there.....

sidenote, i love the shitty b characters they throw in to be like yes you know this person but no they are not cool enough for u to even think about befriending. the first one of those is face paint kid, and now we have another, who is a former beater girl with horrible bangs named bean who didnt go to any classes for a whole season so she could just play ball 24/7 and got kicked off the team.  this is a character who only exists to provide an explanation as to why there would be a beater position open but i love them on principle. 

right now im in the midst of another time sensitive event, this one is a bother-your-brother-at-work-day event where recent hogwarts graduate bill weasley is bullied by myself and his younger brother charlie into letting us go with him on one of his curse breaking jobs. 

so for those unfamiliar, bill works for the magical bank of england.... and his job seems to be “retrieving treasure” for said bank. in the books, there is a bit where he takes his family on one of his trips to egypt, where his job seemed to have been tomb plundering indiana jones style for the posterity of the english bank :X. i wont explain here why thats bad but its bad. 

the game devs however in this instance, at least SEEM to be doing what jkr couldnt do by attempting to salvage what is left of gringotts bank and form it into not a super shitty implications factory run by horrible jewish caricatures. bills mission is to retrieve a goblin made artifact that was taken by dragons, so no going to foreign countries to steal things from other people! only going to a dragon reserve to rifle through animal nests. they even appear to be providing us with a likable goblin character, egad!  

my hope for this event is that we get a plotline about how maybe, goblins arent shifty human haters for no reason, and in fact they hate magic humans for very understandable reasons, like being forced to go into hiding with the rest of the magical world even though only the humans wanted to do that, and maybe despite running the bank in england they still dont have a lot of political sway in the world of wizards and witches, and have to rely on the faith that said wizards and witches wont fuck them over at every turn, even as they see how they treat other non-humans, such as house elves, which they desperately dont want to end up like. and maybe they DONT only care about gold... maybe thats a human stereotype based on the fact that theres a long history of humans not respecting goblin ownership customs.... which i could get into..... but i wont.... i just....... very badly dont want them to suck ;__________;

i know i said its ok to still like a piece of media as long as you recognize the problems with it, and i do, but once this game is done im gonna stop hp posting all together. ive been feeling more and more uncomfortable making these posts lately.  

GENERAL GAME NOTES; theres been some new layout changes and such. 

most notably the stairs screen has been changed from a bulleted list of all locations to a screen with tiles picturing an image of each location along with the name + icons of all classes at each place. there is one additional location that is new and yet to be unlocked, and the dragon reservation is appearing temporarily as its own tile as well. i prefer this method of getting in and out of a temporary location to how they did it with car during the last christmas special. the stairs icon also now stays in the corner when you scroll through locations, allowing you to open the stairs menu without scrolling all the way back to the left. 

they also moved a few of the buttons down into the lower left corner rather than the left side & combined the story button and sidequest button. they added a little camera button as well, just like in the dormitory, that makes all the icons in a location disappear and look better for screenshots. 

the daily special add offer thing now has its own button in the top right corner of the screen, and idk if i mentioned it before but now there are daily challenges that appear in the sidequest screen that offer small rewards for completing 3 tasks per day + a better one if u get all 3. the prizes are things like 4 energy, 75 coins, 3 monster food. the better rewards are usually either more coins, 8 energy, 3 gems, or 1 notebook. i think that it does all the different color notebooks but i cant remember for sure if i ever saw the gold one up as a reward. i like this addition in any case. if you dont pick up ur reward by the end of the day, the next time u log on it will force u to stop and accept them, and if one of the rewards is energy and ur energy bar is full, it does not seem to stack beyond the bar so watch out.

 the character stats page is now more zoomed out so you can see your full character instead of just from the waist up. no change to the leaderboard. rowans face in the friendship roster is now a still black and white image that says ur friend may be gone but friendship is forever u-u. 

rowan has been removed from all classes. in the classes where the minigames involved her, those minigames have passed the mantle onto other friends in the class. in potions that person is now liz helping u find stuff off the shelves and in tranfiguration that person is badeea. bless these girls for helping mc get through it. touched my heart. 

theres been a few fun little “i know u have more free time now so uhhhh have some energy” prizes like they do sometimes when they dont update on schedule so thats been nice. just a few days ago they gifted us 3 gold notebooks the same way. :O. 

theres also been a few instances of a energy happy hour where for a limited time energy takes less time to refresh. normally it takes 4 mins for 1 energy to do this but during happy hour its like 2:30 mins. :U its all very interesting.

and that will have to do it for tonight my friends, ill do a post for the dragon event when its done because i do like it so far and i do like getting to bully bill with charlie. 

until next time, remember.......

[robinskalechip]

home - chapter four

robin buckley x reader

a/n: send me hc requests! also i feel like i say that they smile or laugh or chuckle or grin or etc a lot but they’re happy and in love so just go with it

warnings: language

not my gif!

chapter four - wake up call

robin woke up to the sound of her alarm going off, indicating that it was unfortunately the morning and time to go to the hell hole known as hawkins high. she stayed laying in bed for a few moments before sitting up and rubbing her eyes. she got up and walked to the bathroom, eyes practically still shut. turning the water on for the shower, she began to brush her teeth as she let the water warm up.

after a fifteen minute shower, she retrieved the day’s outfit and displayed it on her bed. she put on her jeans and bra and was getting ready to put on a black bon jovi tee shirt until she heard something from her window. she turned to see small masses hitting her window.

she approached the window to investigate and saw her, dressed in jeans, a hawkins pullover sweatshirt with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows, a pair of minimal round glasses and her hair in a messy updo. and of course she was wearing that smile that made almost everyone melt. robin opened her window that faced the front yard and was met with her new favorite pair of eyes.

“morning sunshine”, sofia was bright, even in the early hours of the day.

“can i ask why your performing a massacre on my window at this early of an hour”

“you forgot your bike in my car, figured you’d need it back”

robin couldn’t believe she had forgotten her bike. it was out of her character to forget something so important.

“actually, do you want a ride to school?” sofia seemed different when she said this and robin took notice, she seemed nervous.

robin smiled at her, “give me like five minutes”

the two held eye contact until robin closed the window and hurriedly got dressed.

after four minutes of finishing up the rest of her daily routine as quickly as possible, robin headed downstairs to meet her mom with an apple ready for robin. she took it and gave her mother a kiss goodbye as she sped to leave the house.

sofia was lost in thought as she read from a plain black and white composition book until her thoughts were disturbed when robin’s presence took over her attention. sofia closed the book and smiled at robin, “ready?”

“ready? yes. willing? no”

sofia laughed as she started the car engine and then reached into the backseat, “did you eat?”

she presented a bag that contained a bagel and a cup of mixed fruit, “i dont eat much in the mornings, makes me feel sick.” she took the bagel out and tore it in half, offering the half to robin who took it without hesitation.

“im the same way, my mom always just gives me a piece of fruit while she makes my dad a whole buffet before they go to work together”

the two talked amongst themselves about films robin had recently seen and the ones sofia was planning to see when they were released movie junkies in love and promising each other to go together to certain movies. they also talked about the kids and how they were doing, ie how max and lucas are the most chaotic of couples and mike still calls el every single day to talk for hours on end

sofia reached into the back seat once again, this time presenting the notebook she had been reading when robin first entered the car, “will wrote to me once a week. he wrote down what was going on so i wouldn’t miss a thing” she smiled fondly as she remembered the young boy who was like her younger brother. “mike said will sent it to him whenever he found out i was back. he gave me the byers’ number too but i don’t know if i could make it through a phone call without crying honestly”

“did he mean a lot to you”

“he was my heart. everything i did was for him. i wanted to set a good example for him. he felt like such an outsider, even with the other boys and i just-“

she took a moment to breathe and collect herself before her emotions could take over, “i saw so much of myself in him”

robin looked down and reached for sofia’s hand, the two then looking up at the same exact time to meet each other’s eyes

“it wasn’t until i got to know him that i understood what my mom used to say to me, ‘ti darei il sole se potessi id give you the sun if i could’”

sofia began to translate, “it means-“

robin cut her off, “id give you the sun if i could”

this was sofia’s moment where her heart went fucking insane and she was ready to kiss robin at the drop of a hat.

“i never understood it until then. you could give someone all of the stars in the galaxies but none of them will shine as bright as the sun. none of them will provide you with as much warmth and support and light as the sun. will was my light”

“maybe you can take a road trip, go see him?”

“will you come with me?”

robin smiled, her heart fluttering faster than ever, “of course, anything to get out of here. i can ask for next weekend off?”

sofia nodded as she began to back out of the driveway of robin’s house

as she drove the short drive to hawkins high she began to ask robin about steve, “he’s different ya know”

robin was confused at first, “who?”

“steve, he’s less...douchey”

robin chuckled, “he’s still a dingus but he’s definitely matured in his own way”

sofia could not believe the words being used to describe steve, HER steve, “growing up he always got so many girls’ attention and it took him so long to actually get some game but somehow i think he’s lost it since graduating”

robin smiled, “are you aware of my important data i keep at the store?”

“important data?”

“swing by later, i’ll show you”

sofia parked in her old spot as robin began to gather her things and then turned to the girl in the driver’s seat who was now leaned back and looking at her with a smile on her face

“what? do i have cream on my lip again?”

a small chuckle escaped from her lips, “no, just thinking, i’ll see you later. i can pick you up if you want. after all i still have your bike in the back”

“i’d like that” as robin was about to leave but she stopped and stared at the girl for a moment. all she wanted to do was kiss her. it felt almost instinctive to part ways with one but she contained herself like she had done since the moment she met her. instead, she flashed her another smile as she got out of the car.

only two seconds after the door closed, sofia noticed robin forgot her apple her mom gave her that she never ended up eating thanks to sofia’s breakfast catering

she open the door in a hurried manner and called out robin’s name and causing her to jump and turn her head back to meet sofia’s eyes as she held up the red fruit, “you might get hungry later”

robin walked back to the driver’s side of the car to retrieve the fruit from sofia, their fingers slightly brushing up against each other as they partook in the exchange and looked up to meet each others eyes; the earth and the sea coming together as robin’s blue and sofia’s green locked

it wasn’t until their moment was cut off with a familiar yelling, “SOFIA”

quickly followed by an ambush of kids running towards the two girls

mike and dustin were smiling at the two girls while max and lucas followed behind them, arguing before sofia could intervene to see what the conflict was

“hey hey what are you two yelling about before first period has even started”

lucas looked at sofia, using his eyes to beg for back up, “tell her that new coke is better, tell her”

sofia looked at mike who mouthed, “its not” which made her giggle

“i’m sorry lucas, i can’t help you there. i don’t drink coke and you know i am an honest woman at all times but im SURE she’s right” she bent down slightly and motioned for lucas to come closer as she began to whisper , “they’re always right, especially one like max who is smarter than all of you combined” she paused for a moment “well dustin is close behind but i still stand by my statement” she winked at max who smiled at her.

max liked sofia, even though she had only just met her. lucas had told her a lot about her and sofia even promised to do a movie night with her

mike was about to walk off until he jumped towards sofia, “hEY do you think you can give us a ride home? my movie night isn’t until next week”

robin and sofia looked at each other, now with the younger ones in between them. they smiled at each other. they have already made it a thing to communicate with their eyes

“how’s this? im taking robin to work already so i will take the four of you with me if you can all squish together in the backseat, and mike” he looked way too excited when she turned her attention to him “we can do our movie night tonight but we have to finish in time for me to get robin after her shift”

mike nodded with such enthusiasm, it made max laugh

“now go all of you before you’re late” sofia said, looking like a proud mother sending her kids off

all four children ran off, yelling their goodbyes and waving their hands, dustin making a heart with his hands and screaming “I LOVE YOU” the purest of children

robin laughed as she stepped back to her original spot close to sofia, still eyeing the children as they ran off, “be honest, which one is your favorite”

sofia made a sarcastic and overdramatized shocked face, “a mother never has favorites..”

robin gave her a “that’s bullshit” look

“but will, its always been will. dustin has his moments”

robin smiled, “i figured”

“you should probably go too though. i’d hate to be the reason you’re late”

robin had the erge to kiss her again. she held back again.

not yet. not now.

next chapter

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Back at the farm, Elijah walks, dazed but relaxed, back to the house. He checks behind him once, twice, to see if Rocky, who had followed him to the edge of his parents' property, still sits in the woods, wagging his tail at Elijah.

He doesn't.

"You look like you've seen a ghost," Amanda says, as she steps out the front door. The sun is shining, bright and warm already for eight in the morning, and Elijah shakes the woods off of him as best he can.

While he's grateful the beast is a silly witch in the woods, the idea that someone out there just... lives in abandoned shack in his woods unsettles him.

"Not a ghost," Elijah says. He sighs. "Has this town always been this fucking creepy?"

Amanda cocks her head and looks at her son with a smile, then steps down the front steps and towards the hay truck. "The city has made you suspicious, my love." She waves the keys in the air, doesn't look back to Elijah. “Come on. I believe you promised me a trip to the farmer’s market.”

Amanda fiddles with the radio, sings along off-key with wrong lyrics, and Elijah absently brushes the mud from his jeans.

The market’s covered in small tables set up underneath tents. Sunlight shines through the trees, and Elijah all but forgets about Viola and Penny and their tiny shack in the woods. The air is sweet with the smell of apple cider and turnovers, and Elijah follows his mother past table after table of pickles, jams, fresh produce, pies, breads…

He last went when he was seventeen. Far too long ago. The smell of it brings him back to being a child, before he made such a shitty decision, before Josh—

“Elijah, can you take these apples back to the car? I’ve a few more tables I’d like to visit.”

Three bags of apples, Elijah takes to the car, tripping over tree roots and uneven, muddied ground. Passes tables selling food that has his stomach aching with hunger.

Just before the market closes off, though, Elijah notes a man, sitting at his table, his head rested in his hand, elbow on the table, flipping through a book with a bored look on his face. Customers seem to ignore him, as though he’s not there. Candles in mason jars are neatly lined up in front of him, a solitary empty spot where someone has bought one.

He seems to notice Elijah staring, because he lifts his head, locks gazes with him. A smile grows across his face.

“Interest you in some homemade candles, sir?”

Elijah makes a face. “I’m not a sir.” He should keep going, but—the logo of the candles. Elijah drops one of the bags of apples to pick up a candle. “This creature,” he asks, smoothing his thumb over the creature—thick hair, glowing eyes, fingers like nails. “What is it?”

With a shrug, the man says, “The Beast of Easthallow. Local legend. Man a few hundred years ago, back when Easthallow was just a mining town, claims to’ve seen it.” He cocks his head at Elijah. “There’s a book about it, you know. Adapted from Victor East’s journals.”

“So it’s real?”

Laughing, the man leans back in his chair. “Suppose that matters on whether you’re a believer.” He nods his head at the candle. “Supposed to smell like wildflowers if you see it. S’what the candle’s based on.”

Overhead, the sun hides behind dark storm clouds. Around them, the hum of chatter from the farmer’s market quiets for a minute.

“Can give you a discount if you buy the book, too.” He holds up a book, small, a plain black cover, the words THE BEAST OF EASTHALLOW embellished across the front.

Assuming, for a minute, that Elijah believes any of this, other than a crazy couple of witches living in the woods, he’s unemployed. Setting the candle back down, Elijah says, “I don’t have any money.”

He eyes the apples. “How about a few of those? They came from the Richard Orchard, right?” Elijah shrugs. “Two apples, then.”

Fine. Curiosity peaked, Elijah digs into the bag at his feet for two of the apples, without bruises, one still with a stem and leaf, and hands them over. Their fingers brush together, and Elijah’s lips twitch up in a smile, just for a split second, before he pulls back.

“Do you plan on hunting it?” the man says, dropping the apples into a bucket beside him.

“…Hunting it?”

“We also sell candles that smell like rotten wood and wet dog. Supposed to attract the Beast.”

Elijah snorts. “A candle that smells like garbage?” He shakes his head. “I’ll go with the wildflowers.” Maybe he can gift it to his mother for Christmas.

“I’ll just get you a receipt,” the man says. Elijah hears someone walk up behind him, and turns his head, sees Amanda stepping around counters, a single, small loaf of bread under her arm.

She smiles down at the man, currently scribbling out a receipt for Elijah, and says, “Good morning, Grant. All well at home?”

He lifts his head, looking between the two of them for just a beat or two before he smiles, pleasant and wide, and his eyes—

Elijah clears his throat, averts his gaze. His heart aches, as he thinks of Sean, back home. What used to be home. He wonders if the man he’d found Sean with would be comforting, in Elijah’s absence, or if he’ll find Elijah leaving cause for celebration.

“…fine, Mrs. Flynn.” Grant flashes her a smile, hands over the receipt to Elijah and says, “Have a good day.”

Elijah reaches for the receipt, and Grant winks as their fingers touch again.

As they leave, Amanda weaves her arm around Elijah’s, says, “That wasn’t so bad, was it? And I see you picked up some items as well.” She nods to the book, the candle in the bag. “Didn’t think you were a candle sort.” She smiles, reaches into the bags, plucks out an apple, and begins chattering on.

Elijah glances at the receipt. Ten digits, scribbled at the bottom—give me a call, if you’d like.

At the farm, Elijah thumbs over the receipt as he sits, reclined on the couch, listening as rain beats down on the tin roof. It’s dark, for mid-afternoon; a deep blue-grey overcast filtering the sun out and shadowing the fields.

Still better than the city.

He sighs. Reads the note again. Little early for hookups, isn’t it? Ezra considers himself fairly capable of moving on quickly, but still, if he thinks too much about Sean, something in his chest goes tight and the world feels too small. He could have gone to the other side of the country, to Australia or Japan, and still Sean would feel too close.

Fingers reach up behind him and pluck the receipt out of hand, though, and Elijah doesn’t even bother turning around to chastise his brother. Instead, he says, “Really? We’re being this childish, now?”

Josh reads the note out loud, makes an awwwww sound, and says, “What happened to Sean, McDreamy? Weren’t you guys happy-ever-after or whatever you want to call it?”

“We’re not in trouble,” Elijah says, but he doesn’t make an attempt at the receipt. He just rubs his eyes, wonders how long it’ll take Josh to give up on this. “And it’s none of your fucking business.”

It’s not a lie; they’re not in trouble. Elijah’s completely out of trouble. Feels better about this than he ever has. Josh, though, Josh takes that and runs with it, his eyes getting wide, and he says, “Holy shit. You’re not—“

“Josh—“ Footsteps are coming up from the basement steps, and fuck, Elijah’s not ready to admit that he’d failed in the city, that he ran home with his tail tucked between his legs, and no. They don’t need to know. They don’t need to know. Not yet. Not until Elijah can get on top of things, until he can 

When she reaches the top of the stairs, Amanda glances between them, offers a tentative smile. “Getting on, I hope?” She doesn’t wait for an answer, already heading for her bedroom with the laundry basket. “So nice to see the two of you in the same room without screaming…”

She leaves before Josh can say anything, thankfully, and with a pleased sigh, Josh holds the receipt back out. “S’cute. Taking a page out of your older bro’s book, lying to Mom and Dad.”

Refraining from reaching for the receipt, Elijah says, “I’m not lying to them. And would you stop it with the older bro shit?”

Holding his hands in mock surrender, Josh says, "All right. Just... interesting you're the one keeping secrets these days, is all."

Elijah watches him leave, jaw clenched, and lets out a frustrated groan when Josh is finally around the corner.

It's good, though, right, to meet people. In Easthallow. If he's going to be living here... he'll need a network. Grant can help with that.

He calls the number before he can tell himself not to.

"Elijah," he answers, and his voice is smoother, on the phone, than it really should be. "I wondered if you'd call."

"How do you know it's Elijah?"

A beat, then, "I had a feeling. I wanted to know if you’d be interested in getting a drink?” So the entire town can know about it. So Elijah can spend the evening shooting glances around the bar, wondering who he can trust and whether Grant’s one of those people or not. “About the Beast—“

And Elijah laughs, runs a hand through his hair, and wonders if the entire town is like this. “You don’t really believe in it, do you?”

“You’re meant to believe what you see, right?”

“I’ve seen this Beast,” Elijah says. “Didn’t seem so freaky to me.”

Grant makes a noise, like a scoff, but his voice holds no judgement. “Everyone knows about Viola.”

Fine. Just to sate his curiosity. “All right. Drinks, and you can tell me all about this furry little beast of yours.”

Grant meets him in town, dressed in a light jacket Elijah finds himself jealous of, in the misting cold. He reaches out for a handshake. "Good to meet you."

"You, too," Elijah says. "I thought I knew everyone in this town." He grew up here, went to school here. Graduated with twenty kids in his class. Grant... either he was older, younger, or... wasn't from here.

As though sensing Elijah's thoughts, he sends him a sidelong glance and says, "I grew up in the city. Parents divorced when I was little. Thought I'd do better there, but I always liked the country." His smile is warm, pleasant, and Elijah wonders if it helps with the cold or if he's blushing under Grant's gaze. "What about you?"

"City all the way," Elijah says. "Stepping in cow shit has never been my version of fun."

Grant laughs. It feels good, genuine; Elijah can't remember the last time he made someone laugh. "Plenty of other farms than cattle farms."

"Not according to my parents," Elijah says. "You know they started planting crops when I was fifteen, to help with running costs, and my dad flipped?" He did; Allan's a livestock man, through and through. Elijah still remembers the nights his parents stomped around downstairs, trying to make sense of their next plan.

"What happened? Nobody in Easthallow exports crops."

They take a seat at the bar. Grant holds up two fingers to the bartender, and soft country music plays from the corner of the room, and something settles in Elijah's stomach. He's used to drink menus, twenty minutes with Sean while he tries to decide what he wants, and it's like relief when the bartender slides two beers in front of them and disappears.

It's the little things Elijah loves about this town.

"I knew your brother," Grant says, as he digs his phone out his pocket. "Back in high school."

His mood sours, but Elijah tries not to let it. He peers into the bottle, thinks about downing it all in one go. Doesn't.

"He was a prick." Grant taps away on his phone. "Little fucker nearly drove my little sister insane."

Sounds like Josh. "He cheat on her? Josh is an asshole."

"Wouldn't give her the time of day, mostly. She thought they'd grow up, get married, have kids, whole nine yards. Josh found out and... she ended up homeschooling for the rest of high school."

He remembers that. Something faint, and, hell, Elijah didn't even know the girl, but Josh slept with her best friend and then there was all kinds of drama. Because of Josh. It's hard to believe anyone thought he was a catch, but people like the bad boy thing.

"Don't hold that against me, do you?"

Grant doesn't even lift his gaze to meet Elijah's. "If you were anything like your brother, you wouldn't be speaking with me."

He turns his phone to Elijah, finally, onto a homepage for THE BEAST OF EASTHALLOW. He clicks around a bit, checks out the first hand accounts--all written journalism style, with publishing dates and Grant's name at the top as the author--the photos.

"A lot of them are Viola," Grant says, gesturing to the phone with the beer. "She loves getting dressed ip on tourist weekends and scaring the shit out of the visitors in the cabins." He smiles, shakes his head.

"She's not the start of the rumor, then?" Elijah'd been sure... she could've seen something, made the costume as a joke, to keep people away from her house...

"Nah. Viola's big into local history. Or--Penny, her wife, is. Viola took a liking to the Beast 'cause it's mystical."

Grant's thigh rubs against Elijah's, just a little. Just enough to catch the fabric, enough for the pull to tune Elijah into how close they are everywhere. "Did you read the book?"

"Book?" Elijah echoes, then clears his throat. Grateful for the low lights that help hide his blush, Elijah adds, "Right. No. Didn't even crack the spine."

Like he expects it, Grant scrolls down through his phone again, until he stops at a very clear, very close photo. "This is the most famous ever taken. Fifteen years ago or something like that."

When Elijah lived here. Why the fuck didn't he ever hear about this? "Someone's screwing with me," Elijah says. "I grew up here, and we never had a fucking local cryptid, unless you count the town drunk."

"Fifteen years ago, no one used to see it."

"We don't see it now."

Tapping the screen of his phone, Grant says, "Twenty times in the last year."

It's Josh. It's gotta be fucking Josh, enlisting the entire fucking town, right? Found some freaky girl in the woods to scare him, some guy at the farmer's market to fuck with him, and...

That doesn't make sense, though. Josh didn't know he was coming, and Elijah hasn't been home that long. Is this... does Grant actually believe this shit? That there's really some fucking monster crawling around their little town? Easthallow's a trash heap, people and literal garbage. There’s no cause for why he might be…

Elijah huffs a laugh, shakes his head. Downs the rest of his beer and says, “So, okay. Let’s say I believe in your furry little friend, just for like, five seconds.” He’s still not convinced it isn’t Viola. That this entire set-up isn’t something done to fuck with newbies. “Why only see it now?”

The question of the hour. Grant glances up at him, his eyes twinkling. Something there lights a fire on all of Elijah’s nerves, leaves him feeling warm, pleased, arousal building in his stomach. Grant’s an attractive guy; the muscles that scream outdoor labor, a five o’clock shadow Elijah wants to feel against his skin. Dark eyes Elijah could get lost in, and smooth, tan skin, and hair just long enough to pull.

Shit, he’s tapping his phone again, eyebrow raised like he knows Elijah’s imagining being held down by him, and he says, “Hundred year anniversary of old man Lowell’s suicide.”

“He killed himself?”

“So said the newspapers,” Grant said. “Lots of conflicting reports, though. Another one said he died in the old mine tunnels. Pushed from the roof of the Carnegie library… One said he got caught in a wood-chipper.”

Grimacing, Elijah takes a drink of his beer. “Poor way to go.”

But Grant’s voice is thoughtful when he asks, “Is it? Head first, maybe…” He shrugs.

Silence settles between them, Elijah picking at the label on his beer, Grant tapping his fingers rhythmically on the bar top, before Grant finally says, “So what brings you to Easthallow?”

It isn’t a secret, not really, but Elijah hesitates nonetheless. It’s only been a few days since Elijah spoke to Sean, but it feels like it’s been weeks. Easthallow seems so far removed from the city. Always has. “Bad breakup,” he says, finally, then, “or—not really. Just a breakup.”

“He cheat on you?”

Elijah turns his gaze to Grant. How the fuck does he know. He asks as much, and Grant just chuckles, shrugs one shoulder. Ducks his head in something like embarrassment. “I haven’t told anyone.”

“You have a vibe,” Grant says. “Definitely not from here. Wouldn’t come to Easthallow unless you had family. No one comes here.”

“Viola and Penny?”

With a twitch of his lips, Grant says, “I stand corrected.”

Elijah finishes his beer. Returns it to the coaster. Beside him, Grant pockets his phone. “I could show you Old Man Lowell’s place, if you’re up for it.”

Making a face, Elijah says, “Doesn’t that place have to be ancient by now? How’s it still standing?”

Before Grant can answer, Elijah’s phone buzzes in his pocket, incessant against his thigh. He apologizes as he checks it—his mother.

“Sorry, dear,” she says, but sounds exhausted, “your father has a situation with the cattle. Can you come home, help him out?”

Like a child, Elijah says, “Isn’t Josh home to help.”

Her voice is thick with false sweetness when Amanda says, “I’m asking you.”

He doesn’t have much of a choice, then. Offers a tight smile to Grant when he gets off the phone, pockets his phone. “Dad needs me. Cattle probably got loose.”

But Grant’s gaze snaps to Elijah’s, and his questions are lightning fast, one after another, until Elijah reaches out and grips Grant’s wrist. Intimate, for a man he’d met earlier that day. For a man with a curiosity for the unknown and a crazy loom in his eye when he talks about it. “I’m sure he’d welcome the help. My brother’s useless.”

“Bringing a strange man back to the house already?” Grant tsks, but leaves a twenty on the bar as he stands. “What will your parents say?”

Nothing, if Elijah has anything to do about it. “My mother knows you my name. I’d hardly consider you strange.”

The farm is a cacophony of noises when Elijah arrives there. A loud barking, his father’s deep voice as he hollers, the loud, angry mooing of a cow that does not want to follow orders.

“Yikes,” Grant says, closing the door to the driver’s side of his SUV. “Suddenly glad my parents run an orchard.”

“It’s not always like this,” Elijah says by means of explanation. Never once has he heard a dog barking here. His father’s allergic. He can make out his mother standing at the edge of the field, though, makes his way across the yard towards her. Grant’s headlights shine out toward her.

“Elijah,” she says, gripping his arm as he stops by her side. “Your father’s been at this for an hour. Something spooked the cattle.”

No shit. Even from here he can make out the door to the barn, broken off the hinges. “Dad leave the barn open?”

Amanda shakes her head. “No. Strangest thing. The hinges are bent.”

A chill runs through him; the hair on the back of his neck stands up. He takes a quick glance around the yard—lit up by the emergency lights his father had installed—but sees nothing, save for Grant as he makes his way towards them. “Not surprising,” he says. “Cattle are strong. Especially if the bull got out.” A beat. “So someone broke in?”

She takes a second to glance Grant’s way, a twinkle in her eye as he reaches out to shake her hand. “Grant. Didn’t realize Elijah was bringing help.” Before he can offer anything by means of explanation, she adds, “The more the merrier.”

Another bark sounds from the field, and Amanda whistles. “And this fucking dog. No idea where it came from.”

At her whistle, the dog comes bounding up to her, tongue wagging out of its mouth. In the dark, it’s a little different, but Elijah would recognize it anywhere. “Rocky?”

He barks, wags his tail. Amanda looks between them with a frown. “You know him?”

Elijah reaches to scratch his ears. “I met his owner the other day—” He almost says in the woods; doesn’t want to tell her what he was doing out there. “—does he come here often?”

“More than we’d like.”

Behind them, Grant adds, “Could it have been the dog who spooked them?”

Amanda shrugs. “Not likely. Allan nearly got one back to the barn before it ran off again.”

“You guys check the barn out?”

What? No. Elijah really doesn’t want to go play detective right now. He wants to go to the field, help his father wrangle the half-dozen cows and the bull back into their barns. But Grant’s already eyeing the barn, and Elijah’s not going to leave him on his own.

Not until he trusts what the fuck is going on here.

“Be my guest,” Amanda says. “After that, can you guys head out to the field?”

“Will do, Mama.”

Rocky follows at their heels, quieting the closer the get to the barn. The hair on the back of Elijah’s neck still stands on end, but, save for his mother and Grant, the farm’s clear—nothing out of the ordinary.

Grant whistles as he pulls on the door. “Damn thing’s strong.”

“Thing would’ve taken a truck to pull it off the hinges like this.” Elijah rubs his hand along the bent metal. The hinges look twisted, ruined beyond repair, the metal worn and fragile in places. “They’d’ve heard it.”

“No one’s gonna take a damn truck to a barn door, either. Easier to steal the cattle out of the pasture.” Grant seems lost in thought for a few seconds, then pulls a small flashlight from his pocket. “And that’s still a lot of work for half a dozen cattle.”

Old cattle, too. Allan does it more as a hobby, now, than as a way to make money. Breeds the cattle, trades them to keep the bloodlines clean. Elijah remembers some of it from when he used to live here. His father’s trips to cattle auctions.

“Elijah,” Grant says. His tone, soft, strange, not quite a whisper but not his normal tone, piques Elijah’s interest, and he follows Grant’s gaze to where he’s brushing his fingers along where the door used to sit against the side of the barn. He doesn’t see anything at first, just like Grant’s pressing against nothing, and then…

Three long, thick gashes in the wood, splintering the siding out. Like nails, fingernails, but… there’s nothing that could do that. A bear, maybe a cougar, but… “You’re seeing this, too, right?”

Anger flares in Elijah’s stomach. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” Josh. He’s always been a joker, but—fuck, getting the cattle involved in his homecoming prank on Elijah? This isn’t some petty joke he’s playing, built from an old sibling rivalry he won’t let go of anymore. This isn’t just between them, and as soon as Elijah gets him alone, he’s going to tear his brother a new one.

He turns on his heel, back towards the field, towards where he can hear his father making whooping noises towards the cattle in the dark. Josh is—damn it. Usually better about this sort of thing. It’s not the first time one of his jokes has gone too far, but it’s about to be the last.

He comes across one of the cows before he sees his father. Behind him, he hears Grant’s footsteps. The cow makes a noise, distressed, and starts to stand. Elijah holds a hand out, palm up, and says, “Easy girl, you’re okay,” in a voice he hopes is soothing.

Still, she only makes concerned noises, struggling to get up, get away. Elijah turns, slow, moves so she’ll run towards the house, not farther into the field, still talking in quiet tones. “Easy—let’s get you back to the barn, yeah? Back to sleep? Bet Dad’s got some treats for you. How ‘bout you follow me?”

She moos again; this time, her voice breaks, and she stands, slow, staring off into the darkness behind Elijah. “Grant, you’re freaking her out,” Elijah says. “Can you back away, just a bit?”

No sound, though; no answer. Not even footsteps as Grant moves. Elijah turns, ready to ask him again, when he sees it—fur, thick, eyes glowing yellow in the dark, shining in the light from the yard. It stands tall, taller than Elijah by at least a foot, and its teeth glimmer, sharp and long. Arms, impossibly long, hang at its sides, its chest heaving with each breath.

It’s different, up close. Taller, thinner. Creepier. He thinks about Viola, about how her costume looks up close, and knows, without a doubt, this isn’t her.

His throat goes dry, his blood rushes like a river through his ears. He can’t scream, doesn’t know what he would say if he could, and hopes to tell Josh off for this, later, when the thing snarls, and the next thing Elijah sees is the large, clawed hand that reaches out, as if from the shadows, and punches him in the head.

He doesn’t remember falling.

[y4yrgswm-blog]

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[strangely-amusing]

Oppa

Characters : Jaehyun x You

WordCount : 4,886

Genre : Romance, Teacher!Jaehyun

Note : Crappy title, i know. But i can’t think of any other words. Anyway, this is a repost bcs back then i made this into 2 parts (idk why)

You looked at your reflection in the mirror and smiled. Your hair had grown a lot longer and you were very happy about it. You fixed your bangs one more time, and grabbed your bag. You turned off the lamp and left your room, walking downstairs happily. At the dining table, your parents and brother were already waiting for you, quietly munching on their toast.

“Good morning!” You chirped happily, taking a seat next to your brother. They all looked up and took a few seconds, deciding whether they like your new hair or not. Your mom smiled sweetly and bopped your nose. “You look stunning, dear”

“Aw thank-“

“Yes, you look stunning, you look gorgeous. But way too pretty for school. What if you get hit on??” Your brother exclaimed, cutting you off.

“Agreed.” Your dad shortly added, sipping on his tea.

You rolled your eyes and grabbed a toast. “Come on now, You get hit on all the time. Its not like i would date everyone who hit on me.”

He looked at you weirdly. “Now you can’t blame me for my good looks. You can blame them.” He said, eyeing your parents. “And also, i can’t protect you from those nasty fuckboys.”

“Language, Taeyong.” Your mom glanced at him. She then grinned. “you should thank me and your father for your good looks. People spend a lot of money to get a nose like yours, Taeyong.”

Taeyong sighed. “Still, what if she attracts the wrong kind of people? I don’t want my lil sister getting hurt.”

You munched on your toast and smiled at him. “Don’t worry, I will tell you everything!”

Your dad looked up and squinted his eyes. “by everything you mean, um, i dont know, everyone?”

You nodded, finisihing your toast. “Everyone. Friends, Best friends, Crush, Boyfriend, if i have one. I’m only gonna tell Taeyong though.”

“Come on now.” Your dad groaned while Taeyong grinned, giving you two thumbs up. Your dad glared at Taeyong and gave him a frown. “I expect you to tell me everything.”

Taeyong smiled and shook his head. “Nope.”

In which you cheered and gave him a hi-5. Your dad’s face fell and his jaw dropped. He then glanced at your mom, hoping for her support. Without looking up from her breakfast, she shortly said, “Darling, they are young and you should let them be free.”

“That’s exactly why! They’re young and dumb!” Your dad said, frowning. You and Taeyong looked at him, dramatically gasping. “Dad!!!”

“Taeyong is turning 24 this year, And he graduated from the best university in this country and he just got a job at one of the best company out there, and y/n is turning 21 in a few months, also in the best university in this country. So what’s your point?” Your mom deadpanned, looking at him with her eyebrow furrowed. You and Taeyong grinned widely, giving two thumbs up for your mom.

Your dad frowned, unable to argue. ”…….Fine.”

You and Taeyong grinned at each other. Your dad frowned and continued to eat, mumbling about how both of you were “too young” for everything.

Your mom chuckled and got up to give him a kiss on his cheeks. “They’re not children anymore, They’re old enough to make their own decisions.” She said softly.

Your dad sighed, glancing at you and taeyong. “I guess you’re right. But still, you two have to tell me about your current boyfriend and girlfriend, alright?”

“Sir yes sir!” You chirped, doing a salute. Taeyong laughed yet he copied your moves. Your parents chuckled, shaking their heads. Your mom gathered the dirty plates and put them in the dishwasher. “y/n you should get going, your class starts at 10 right?”

You glanced at the clock and nodded at Taeyong. “Come on!”

Taeyong got up from his seat and grabbed his keys. “You know, i always drive you to college And yet you never give me anything in return.”

You put on your shoes and looked at him. “I bake you cakes.”

“I know, but can you maybe, uh i dont know, give your brother a hug or something?” He said, giving you big puppy eyes. You chuckled and stood up. “What is wrong with you today?”

You tiptoed and hugged him tight. “There. Now lets go, I’m gonna be late.”

Taeyong grinned and pulled you outside. “Lets go! Mom! Dad! We’re leaving!”

“Be careful! Don’t speed up!”

Was the last thing you heard before getting in the car.

♡

The ride was mostly silent, mainly because of Taeyong was focused on the road and didn’t want any distractions. You were excited to see your friends. You haven’t gotten the chance to spend your holiday with them as you were busy with yourself the past month. You were trying to lose some weight, to make your skin smooth, to make yourself happy. You weren’t overweight before, but you were definitely not slim either. Your skin wasn’t dry or oily, but you used to have acnes here and there. You were very happy and satisfied with yourself for being able to do things that would make yourself confident.

Now that college has started, You were excited to see what your friends’ reaction about your physical changes. You were also excited to see his reaction.

You walked slowly in the midst of the crowd, being careful not to drop anything or bump into someone. Some people greeted you, some even tried to flirt, and you replied them politely, only thinking about a certain male. You successfully walked past the crowd, and went straight to your class. The class was empty, except for Hani, your bestfriend, sitting in the back of the class. She looked up and her eyes shone. “y/n!”

You gave her a wide smile and walked up to her seat. She immediately stood up and hugged you tight. “I miss you!!!”

You chuckled, feeling a tiny bit embarrassed because people are starting to enter the class. “I miss you too!”

She then let go and looked at you, from your head to your toe and then back to your head. “you gotta tell me what the heck did you do because you look drop dead gorgeous”

“Actually I-“

“I mean you look hot before but now you’re like, so freaking hot??” Hani cut you off, shamelessly checking you out.

You chuckled, blushing a little bit because she was being too loud. “yea i’ve been working on it the past month.

She smirked and then whispered. “I can’t wait to see his reaction.”

You blushed, a certain male popped into your head. “I’m scared though. What if he thinks i’m ugly??or if my bangs are weird?”

Hani looked at you weirdly for a few seconds before hitting your head lightly. “Have you seen yourself? You look gorgeous. You’ve got to change that mind set. Be confident”

You rolled your eyes, but she was right. You have to be confident. “Kay, im gonna sit in the front. you coming?”

She shook his head. “Nope. I’m planning to take a nap.”

You chuckled at her response, and then walked to the front of the class. You chose the chair that was the nearest to the teacher’s desk. It was your unassigned assigned seat. You sat down and put your bag down, only pulling out your notebook and a black pen.

You patiently waited, seeing students started to fill up the class. By the time the clocks struck at 9.50, the class was already full. You watched the door as your heart started to beat faster, expecting a certain someone to walk in.

At exactly 10 AM, The person you were waiting for finally walked in. He was wearing a white button down shirt and black skinny jeans. His usual curly brown hair was now gone, replaced by a short jet black hair. He was gorgeous.

“Good morning class!” His deep smooth voice immediately rang through your ears. You can hear the students replying his greetings, but you stayed silent, eyes glued to the figure in front of you. You failed to notice the way he furrowed his eyebrow at you.

“Good morning, y/n. Cat got your tongue?” He chuckled, grinning at you. You immediately snapped out of your thoughts, and blushed. “Good morning, Mr. Jung”

He chuckled and whispered not so quietly. “Its Jaehyun oppa for you.”

The class started to cheer, some people cooed. You were blushing so hard that you were sure you looked like a boiled crab. Jaehyun saw your blushing face and laughed. “I was just kidding, y/n. Your face is so red right now.”

You nodded, still unable to control your blushing. Jaehyun then chuckled some more. He then bent down to your level and whispered, quietly this time, “I’m sorry, y/n. But you look so cute that i cant help it.”

You looked up at him, surprised. His face seems a bit different from usual, his cheeks seemed a bit pink. He quickly turned his expression back to a straight one, cheeks no longer pink. He then stood back up and went to his desk.

“Now that you’re all smiling, i can begin the lecture much easier.” He said, grinning widely. There were still some groans, but you could hardly hear it. You were so confused by what he had said. He really thinks i’m cute? Or was it another joke to make the situation better? But i swear i can see him blushing? Or was it only my imagination?

You quickly snapped out of your thoughts as he began the lecture, His deep voice always getting your attention. Mr. Jung Jaehyun was one of the youngest lecturer at the age of 24, only 2 years older than you. And he was one of the hottest too. He was friendly and easygoing, and almost everyone fall for him. Including you. You knew it wasn’t the brightest idea to fall in love with your lecturer, but you just can't resist his angelic smile. 

Hours went by, without you know it, the class was coming to an end. By the time he glanced at his watch, you couldn’t help but to feel disappointed.

“Okay, that’s it for today. I’ll see you guys on Friday. Remember to complete and bring the worksheet okay?”

“Okay Mr. Jung.” The class automatically replied. They started to pack up their bags, some already left the class. You had no class after this, so you took your time and packed up your things slowly. Hani walked to your seat, only to give you a wink and a knowing smirk, and then left. By the time you were done, the class was already empty. Except for you, and ofcourse, Mr. Jung Jaehyun.

You weren’t planning to make any moves today, what happened this morning was enough for you. You had been quiet the whole time he was giving lectures, which was unusual for you. You usually raise your hand a couple of times, mainly because of you actually want to ask, or just trying to get his attention. Today, however, was different. He jokes around a lot, but never these kind of jokes. And yes, although he had been so soft and caring towards you, It wasn’t usual for him to casually make that kind of joke towards his students. Especially you. He usually starts the class with a simple greeting and a sweet smile, and that’s it. You were thinking about it the whole time he was giving his lectures. Was it because of your new looks? Was your hair odd or something?

Your train of thoughts disappeared as someone ruffled your hair. You quickly looked up, only to meet the most beautiful pair of eyes gazing back at you.

“Hey, I’m sorry about this morning. You were quiet and a little bit pale so I thought you were nervous.” Jaehyun said apologetically, his lips pressed into a thin line. You could smell his cologne, and it was enticing. You realized he was still waiting for your answer so you pinched your thigh so you can stop daydreaming about the same man that was standing right in front of you.

“O-Oh, its alright, Mr. Jung. You’re not wrong, I was a little bit nervous this morning. Thanks for noticing, though.” You said quietly, giving him a small smile. He gave you a worried look and crouched down to match your eye level. He tilted his head to get a better look of your face. “But why? You have been in my class for the past 3 years, and your grades were great.There’s nothing to worry about.”

You bit your lips and looked down, unsure what to say. You were trying your best not to blush, by thinking it was Taeyong in front of you, instead of him. It worked, though. “Um, I think its because of today is the first day of college after holiday? And also, its my last year here..”

You mentally slapped yourself for that lame excuse. But it seemed like it works. Jaehyun nodded, and stood up. You were a little bit disappointed because now that he was standing, it means that the conversation was going to end.

“Okay, I guess you’re right. I was a bit nervous today too, you know? So you’re not the only one.” He chuckled, walking back to his desk. You stared at him weirdly. “But why?”

“Because I have finally gathered all my courage to make a move on the girl of my dream this year.” He said, smiling widely as he gathers his things. His smile was so bright, that it broke your heart. It made you sad to know that there was someone out there that made him smile so bright. And that ‘someone’ wasn’t you.

You felt a pang in your heart as you tried to smile with him. “Really? That’s great, Mr. Jung.”

It sounded so small and pathetic, but that was the best that you can do. Jaehyun immediately looked up at the tone you were using, his eyes wide at the sight of the tears that were threatening to fall down anytime.

You know that he can practically see your red eyes, tears pooling in the corner of your eyes, but there was nothing you can do. You wanted to leave the room as soon as possible, as you weren’t able to hold it any longer.

“y/n, I didn’t-“

“I’m sorry Mr. Jung, but my brother is waiting for me outside. See you on Friday.” You quickly said, rushing out of the class before he can even reply. Taeyong didn’t pick you up, you lied. You didn’t look back, and went straight outside.

By the time you arrived at the bus stop, tears were already streaming down your face. You grabbed a pack of tissue from your pocket and carefully dabbed your eyes with it.

The girl of his dream… is it another teacher? Of course it is. Who? Is it Ms. Lee? She’s young and pretty…Or maybe its Ms. Park? Hani said she once saw them in a coffee shop together…

You quickly snapped out of your thought as the bus you were waiting for finally arrived. You got on the bus and sat in the back of the bus. As you got closer to your home, you realized that you couldn’t go home like this. Taeyong will freak out if he sees you like this.

You got off the bus, thinking where you should go. 

Maybe walking a bit slower than usual will do the trick.

After walking 15 minutes from the bus stop, you sighed. Walking slowly would only get you to think about what happened today. And you have always hated slow walking.

With that, you continued to walk in a rather fast pace and arrived at your home in less than 10 minutes. You saw Taeyong’s car parked in front of the house, gulping slightly. Its 2 PM, why is he home already?

You took a mirror from your bag and checked your appearance. Your eyes were still a little bit puffy, but there were no tears. That’s good enough for now.

Taking a deep breath, You slowly entered the house. No signs of Taeyong. “Thank god…”

“Thank god for what??”

You squealed In surprise, clutching your heart as you turn around to face Taeyong. He was looking at you weirdly, his eyebrow furrowed.

“Um… thank god it wasn’t hot outside?” You quietly answered, hoping that he’ll let it go. He did, and left to the kitchen without another word. You sighed in relief, and went upstairs.

You entered your room and locked the door. You put your bag on the floor and changed into more comfortable clothing, sighing in relief as you finally take off that skinny jeans. Plopping down onto the bed, you let your mind wanders.

You unconsciously smiled as you remembered Jaehyun’s compliment this morning, wanting nothing more than to hear it over and over again. But the tears started to come back as you recalled his smile when he thought about his “dream girl”.

How can i not know this before?

It had been 2 years since you started to have these feelings for him, 2 years since you started to have late night thoughts about him. you had been searching facts about him, his birthday, his favourite song, his hobby. Obviously, you didn’t do enough research because until this day, you still haven’t found out about his status. He wasn’t married, but you didn’t know if he had a girlfriend.

Taeyong is going to turn 24… and yet he is still single…Jaehyun is the same age as Taeyong, so maybe he is still single too?

You sighed as you realized that it was a dumb assumption. the tears kept falling down, so you closed your eyes, hoping that when you wake up, none of these things had happened.

♡

It had been days after the incident, and without you know it, it was already Friday. You haven’t gotten much sleep, your mind refused to stop thinking about that incident. You haven’t eaten a proper meal too since that day, only eating ramyeon every night.

Your class started at 3 PM, so you don’t have to wake up early and pretend to be happy and excited in front of your family like how you did for these past 3 days. The house was empty the moment you came out of your room, no signs of your parents, no signs of Taeyong either. You eyed the sandwich that your mom made for you. You didn’t feel like eating, so you put the sandwich in the fridge for later.

You sighed, not wanting to meet Jaehyun and his stupid smile. Yes, for the past 3 days you have met him several times, but all those times consist of Jaehyun trying to talk to you, and you running away. It was stupid because you were still going to meet him anyway. This was your last year, you can’t just miss all of his class and still hope you’ll get a good gpa. You thought about him all the time after that incident, and decided that he was not worth your precious time. You should be spending your last year in college studying, and going out occasionally with your friend.

You arrived only a minute before 3 PM, and immediately took a seat in the back of the class, next to Hani. She looked at your eyebags, and then your small wrists. “Are you okay? You look like youre about to faint anytime now.”

You nodded, pulling out your book and your pen. “I’m fine. I guess this is what heartbreak looks like.”

She was about to say something but his voice cut her off.

“Good morning class!” He greeted loudly, walking towards his desk. His hair looked a little bit messy, and there was something off about him. Nonetheless, he still had a smile on his face, although it didn’t reach his eyes.

“Good morning Mr. Jung” the students replied just as loud. You looked down, trying to hide your face so he won’t notice you. You could feel his gaze on you, but you ignored him as you pretended to write something on your notebook.

“I really hope that you all have done your work, because i’m going to collect those in a minute.” He said, not a single emotion on his face. You tried to peek and you regretted doing exactly that in an instant.

He was looking at you with the softest gaze you have ever seen, his beautiful dark brown orbs glistened under the sun’s bright light.

Even though the eye contact only lasted for a few seconds, it almost felt like he read you. You broke the eye contact first, feeling like you would burst in tears if you keep staring.

Jaehyun then started to collect the worksheets, one by one. It made you nervous, because you will have to face him. As he got closer, the more nervous you became. You were not sure what made you nervous. Maybe because you were scared you would do something stupid, Or maybe you were just not strong enough to see his face.

A figure stopped in front of your desk, and you already knew who it was. You shakily gave him your worksheet, refusing to look at his face. He accepted it and left without a word, to your surprise. You sighed, both in relief and disappointment.

You felt your Hani’s concerned gaze on you. “y/n, are you sure you’re okay? You look so pale.”

You turned to her and gave her a weak smile. “I mean, i only eat ramyeon for the past few days but im fine i guess.”

Hani’s eyes widened and she immediately grabbed your shoulder. “Oh my god, why? Are you okay right now? How do you feel? How about your stomach?”

Her voice was loud, so loud that it immediately captured Jaehyun’s attention. He glanced at the two of you, looking concerned. But you looked the other way, hoping that he’ll let it go. He did, thankfully.

You glanced at Hani and gave her yet another small smile, signalling that youre okay. Hani looked concerned, but she nodded and stayed quiet. Jaehyun then went back to his desk and began the lecture.

The whole time he was standing in front of the class, you felt nauseous. Maybe its because of all those ramyeon, or maybe its because of the negative thoughts that you’ve been having these past days, or maybe its because of him? Whichever it was, it got worse and worse as the hours went by. By the time Jaehyun ended his lecture, you can no longer see clearly. Everything was blurry, and spinning. You tried to reach out to Hani, but you can feel your body fell before you can even touch her. Hani’s scream was the last thing you hear before it all went dark.

“y/n, I’m so sorry”

Huh?

You groaned softly as you opened your eyes, blinking a few times to adjust to the light. White sheets, white walls, white circular lamp? This is not my room….

You sat up slowly, looking around the room. No one was there but you, sitting on a bed, looking clueless. “I thought i hear someone…”

You shrugged and paid attention to the room, now that your vision got clear. You finally recognized the room and realized that you were in the nursing room.

“Oh great, i’m still here.” You sighed.

Your head still hurts, but you tried to stand up. Mainly because it was already dark, as you can see from the window across the room. Nursing room sure is scary when night comes.

You found your backpack and all your belongings on a chair besides the door. You tried to pack all your things quickly, uncomfortable with the atmosphere. You almost got a heart attack when the door swung open.

It was Jaehyun.

His eyes widened as he saw you on your knees, trying to pack your bags. He quickly pulled you up on your feet and guided you back to the bed. “y/n, what are you doing? You need to rest!”

You stayed quiet, unable to think, unable to process anything. You decided to answer him with the most logical answer, with the smallest voice. “But its already dark…..”

He sighed, and sat beside you. “I’m sorry, okay. I’m really sorry. Are you okay? Do you want to go home now?”

You nodded, trying not to show any emotions. “yes, i want to go home now.”

Jaehyun sighed and looked at your eyes. “we need to talk, you know that right?”

You looked back at him, taking a shaky breath before answering him. “Yes, i think i need to know what happened after i fainted?”

“Thats not what i meant, but okay…” Jaehyun sighed, eyes looking down at his knees. “I brought you here. Hani insisted to stay but i told her to go home, i told her that im going to wait until you wake up, because i know this is my fault.”

You nodded, looking away. It was quiet for a few seconds, none of you know what to say.

“y/n we really need to-“

“I need to go home.” You quickly cut him off, standing up to pick up your bags. Jaehyun immediately stood up too, grabbing your bags before you can. “I’ll take you home.”

“I can go home by myself.” You answered stubbornly, trying to take your bags from his hands. Jaehyun then looked at you straight in the eye.

“No.”

With that, he grabbed all your belongings and also his, and opened the door for you. You wanted to argue, but you were too weak so you decided to just agree with him. He then followed outside and closed the door behind him. You let him guide the way to his car.

When you approached his car, he immediately opened the door for you. Having no choice but to give in, you gave in and sat in defeat. He put the seatbelt and put your bag on the back seat. He then entered the car and set his seatbelt.

It was silent.

The whole ride was silent.

You haven’t even told him your address, but he didn't ask anything. You got a little bit scared, because at first it didn't seem like he was taking you home. But after seeing the familiar bus stops that you usually see on your way home, you sighed in relief. 

The atmosphere was awkward, but it was better than having to talk casually, cause you both know it is not the time to do so.

“y/n?….” He called you softly.

You answered without looking at him. “Yes, Mr. Jung?”

He sighed when he heard your reply, But he decided to let it go. “Can i ask you something?”

You can practically feel your heart thumping loudly, hands started to sweat. “Um, yeah sure. Whatever.”

“Why did you cry?….” He asked softly, eyes still focused on the road. You bit your lips, unsure what to answer. “I cried because it hurts.”

Jaehyun glanced at you, concerned. “What hurts?”

My heart.

“My legs. I fell down the stairs that morning.” You knew it was a lame excuse, But your mind was a mess because of the soft tone that he was using.

Jaehyun was taken aback with your reply. He stayed silent for a few minutes, before nodding and letting out a small “oh”. After that, it was dead silence. He didn’t even try to initiate a conversation or anything. From the corner of your eye, You can see that his soft gaze turned into a sad, disappointed one. But you tried to let it go,because you didn’t want to get your hopes up.

When you arrived at your home, Jaehyun killed the engine and quickly opened the door for you. You managed to say a small thank you and proceed to walk as fast as you can to the front door. Jaehyun stood by his car, unable to do anything as you hurriedly walked to your home. You stopped in front of your door, and looked back. Jaehyun was standing there, looking at you with a sad gaze and a small, forced smile.

Its gonna be now or never.

“Mr. Jung?”

You called out weakly, slowly turning to face him.

“Yes, y/n?” He answered, and this was the first time that his voice sounds weak.

“I Lied.”

“……about what?” He furrowed his eyebrow, confusion written all over his face.

“I cried because i love you.”

His eyes widened as he heard your words. He remained in his place, mouth gaping as if he wants to say something but can’t.

You chuckled bitterly. “It’s okay, Mr. Jung. I know that i have no chance. I just think that letting it all out after holding it in for 2 years would make me feel better. Good luck on your moves, Mr. Jung.”

With that, you quickly turned your body around, trying to open the door as soon as possible. Your movements were stopped by a single hand holding onto your arm.

Jaehyun quickly turned your body around and looked straight into your already glistening eyes.

“Mr. Jung, what are-“

Your words were cut off by a pair of soft lips landing smoothly on top of yours. He was holding the side of your face gently, his other hand holding your waist. You were too struck in the moment that you were unable to move. Why is he kissing me? What about his dream girl?

When he pulled back, you were standing there with your mouth agape. So many things going on right now, So many thoughts in your head. Without even realizing, tear drops have already stained your cheeks.

“Mr. Jung why did-“

With a soft smile, he wiped your tears.

“I told you before, its Jaehyun oppa for you.”

[kosmicdream]

Your Comic Baby

You know that comic or story that you made when you were a teenager (or sometimes even younger) that propelled you to really WANT to create it. FOR REAL. You put all your energy towards it, for years, determined that it was going to be the one you HAD to make. But then something doesnt go right because, comics are hard-- so you start over and over and over and each reboot gets a bit more discouraging because you have SO MUCH planned out for this thing and you’re just stuck in the loop of redoing the first 5 pages every couple of years. But something about that story, you just cant let go of. You still want to make it happen because you’ve invested and dedicated so much into it. I know that feeling. I call those stories.. your Comic Baby.

You might have a lot of babies. I know I do. But there’s always this one certain comic baby that i struggle with more than the others. Its a difficult baby because I first made this baby when I was 13. And over the course of my highschool years, I was very outspoken about how i was going to really make this a real book for everyone to read. I was constantly working on it, even taking sketchbooks and clipboards to draw it or the characters in class. People were waiting to read this story because they could see how passionate about it I was. But comics were a lot harder than I thought they would be in my mind. I mean, i knew they would be difficult but it was like my art wasn’t as good as I knew it could be when i drew comics. I didn’t get it. And I’d learn so much and so fast that once i got one chapter finished and ready to read, i didn’t like it anymore.

This process went on until i graduated highschool. This dream of making a comic. Specifically THIS comic. I had a lot of stories i was planning on doing, but there was this one comic i really REALLY invested just. My maximum comic energy into. It was different from the other comics and stories. Not that the other ones werent good, they just didnt have the same bond with me that I had with this story. This comic baby was gonna be the thing i was going to be known for and be the first comic i would presented into the world. And in the end.. it actually wasn’t.

I mean, it was, in a way. Eggshells is a prequel to that baby comic. Set in the same universe. Part of the same story, more like a mini test version reboot of the One True Baby Comic. I decided to give the comics thing another try and started to work on eggshells in August 2011, then to ink in Febuary 2012 and finally started to post it in 2013.. sometime.

I took a really long break from comics between finishing highschool and starting eggshells. I would try here and there, but not getting this baby comic out when i was still IN highschool somehow made me feel like a failure of an artist. I was very hard on myself. I didn’t really know if i was even capable of BEING a comic artist because my comics weren’t coming out how i wanted and I couldn’t finish anything. Besides that, I didn’t even know if I could even make them as a career. (I still don’t know if I can but I know I’m going to continue to try.)

When I decided to start Eggshells, i decided that it would be another attempt at my favorite baby comic because I knew that if any of my stories had the emotional legs to motivate me to get through to the final page-- it would be that one. That special baby comic. I poured so much work into planning and preparing everything in a very tradition sense. Scripts, thumbnails, drawing layouts and props and character turn arounds.. ect ect.

Then the fire happened and I lost my ‘comic bible’ of sorts. The rough draft sketches of the entire thing. It was very sad.

But even before then, actually inking pages was not very fun. Because the process i made for it was .. not very fun. I was running into the same walls that I always had when rendering comic panels. It just was too slow and I couldn’t get a consistent look that i wanted. I wasn’t sure where to put detail (or balance the detail) so I would over render constantly. I would zoom in too much. I didn’t know how much to shade and word bubbles annoyed me. I wasn’t very satisfied and I would spend way too much time on each page.

I felt pretty exhausted after trying to ink it for one year and not even getting through the first chapter. Doubt and old dread of not being capable of a comic artist weighed on my shoulders. Of course then, when the fire happened, i just decided to put all that aside again. My life kinda was.. thrown in a loop.

Similarly, my life has been thrown in another one of those loops. A different kind but still, the same sort of disoriented “where the fuck should i live” kind of things. Some of these feelings have come back, the anxieties and unsureness but.. mostly just remembering about them rather than feeling the SAME things. I have acquired a sense of accomplishment in my art .. just with a totally different comic that came out of no-where. (the worm one, you know.)

My relationship with my art has changed so much at this point and I’m so.. not.. what i had predicted for myself?? Not in a negative way. its just odd. FFAK is such a different comic than i thought I would make too. I would describe the experience of working on FFAK as like, im in a shitty junkyard car and ive decided to slam on the gas as hard as i can and see how far it’ll go. Then it just didn’t stop. It took me on a fucking journey but at 90 miles per hour. No careful consideration, so much explicit violence and sex, aggressive confrontations and social commentary. Sex hat jokes. I really got to see a side of myself that this story continues to bring out. And as I worked on ffak more and more, I would sometimes look over at the passenger seat at the Comic Baby. Crossing their arms judgmentally at me and giving me a look like “Having fun? What about ME? Wasn’t I the important one to you?? Am I not special anymore???”

So sometimes i’d feel bad. And try to work on that one again.. but it didn’t make me feel good. I felt like i had to ride the FFAK wave because that was what was happening in the present and I was discovering too much about myself to go back to this older thing that i had a frustrating history with. It wasn’t that I didn’t LOVE the other story, it just didn’t feel right to work on then. So i just let myself focus on where my energy was wanting to go: The Worm Fucks. And the worm fuck comic is the one people read first. Its the first comic of my own i really got to.. read and experience more than just the first chapter. Its been amazing but its so weird. I feel like its a different kind of artist that makes it sometimes.

I don’t regret the worm fuck comic being the one I’m known for but its still funny to me how easily it might have never happened. If the fire hadn’t taken away so much of my work, I probably would be still slowly pushing out pages for eggshells. Or maybe I would have given up and moved on to do something else with my art career? I don’t know. All i know is what I ended up doing was this weird worm comic that is still going on for .. thousands of pages! and has no end in sight! I didnt even expect eggshells to last 1,000 pages but now I can tell my page-pacing is different than how i expected. I still haven’t even finished a comic yet. Its weird? Am I able to finish comics? I guess I don’t know yet because I haven’t. i might “know” endings to my stories but its very different when actually getting it done. I understand that life is more complicated than that and things like fires can change the circumstances in 10 minutes.

So I’m feeling a fear about this uncertain future I’m facing, I’m seeing that I have to make a lot of huge life changes for where I am going to live and what I have to do to make money to support myself. I’m scared that my routine ive established with FFAK will have to change. I wonder if I’ll never be able to replicate the same exact “throw it all into the wind” energy of working like I was able to.. at least I know I can’t right now, because I need to be careful and calculated again. My surroundings arent stable enough for me to dive headfirst into my projects.

With that I’ve noticed I’m drawing eggshells a little bit and enjoying it like I haven’t before. Is it what I need right now? It feels weirdly comforting to know that, no matter what the history i have with this comic, I’ll come back to it and continue to pick at it a little. it makes me feel like, no matter where I’m going to be in this world physically-- my comics will come along with me and they dont have to leave. they arent a product of circumstance. I can get right back on the horse. Its just part of my life that doesn’t have to go away or be taken away from me. Its a nice secure feeling that there’s this art thing isnt something I have to start over. I’d rather build on what I’ve got and it might take me a long time but I enjoy the journey. That feels good to me.

Anyway, even if I’m scared about where i’ll go from here I know i’ll have my car of screaming comic babies at all different ages that are demanding my attention. and some are more patient than others, i’ve totally ditched some babies along the way that i might pick back up later or merge with other babies through some horrific experiment. I’ll even make some new ones because life inspires me constantly and I have so many problems to sort out and what better way than to project on some cool anime characters. but i love all my comic babies!!!!!! and they love me. i have unique and interesting histories with all of them.

comic baby is such a creepy word but it really feels like they are your strange brain children that are also you. i don’t ever want children of my own, but i can see that i pour.. small small aspects of that i think that energy might be into my comics. (im not pretending its actually the same thing to be perfectly clear.) They take up all your time + energy and make you constantly lose sleep..and they grow distinct personalities that you dont expect and have to deal with.. people will judge you for them and how you “raise” them (make them), you’re endlessly proud of these babies and protective and shed tears for them and want them to SUCCEED and live on forever. you want other people to love them TOO and see the best parts of them, for all their flaws. You want em all to grow up as you hoped or planned but they wont at all. They’ll be totally different but also better than you could have imagined.

Comics & Art are such a special thing to get to experience. While i hope that i can make my dreams a reality with my art, I know that they’ll always be an integral part of my life + how i experience and see life and i’m so thankful ive decided to really let room for it there. Its amazing to me that i almost thought it wouldn’t. and i wasnt going to be allowed to be happy with my art because it wasn’t good enough and i wasn’t enough. but i am. and it is good.

Thank you for reading. -Kosmic