#and i do find those pretty interesting so ive looked into it a bit

[mysticficti0n]

hey girlie I have a question!

sooo I rlly rlly love ur writing and literally I read most ur stuff every night 🤭 but I was wondering maybe if you could write one about Colby Brock.... and just any idea but like I rlly want to see what you could do

from

Bun

I do not mind one bit! I grew up watching Sam and Colby so ofc!! For this I am gonna make up a place because I feel like it heheheh but this is my first Colby fic so don't judge pretty please <3 Ive tried my best and checked for mistakes and hopefully there's none (or very little)

Haunted house

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warnings- ColbyBrockxFem/Reader, swearing, mentions of death, death of children, fire, hanging, fluff/teasing, Y/H/T= your home town, smut!! kissing, smut, P in V, no protection,

words- 10k (sorry ☹︎)

"sooooo are you gonna come tomorrow?" Sam asked me over the phone, it's Halloween tomorrow and he, Colby and some friends had been working really hard the whole of October and decided on the 31st they wanted to do a haunted house sleepover, and this house was in the middle of fucking nowhere, 4 hours away, and miles from the nearest town "because we need to leave like... 9am ish tomorrow to get there in time to meet the owners" I waited a few seconds mentally reviewing my life and really asking myself I wanted to do this

"umm- yeah okay" I agreed and already regretted it "I'll walk to yours and be there for like 8-8:30?" Sam made a noise as if he was talking to someone else then made a huh sound to me "I said I'll walk to yours-"

"ohh- Colby said he can grab you but you'll have to go to the store with him"

"okay no problem, what time though?" Sam said 8am so I set my alarm for 6:30, enough time for a shower, get ready, pack then get in the car with Colby, our conversation continued until another voice interrupted telling the boy he needs to get ready "alright then, see you tomorrow"

"Bye-Bye" he sung and the phone cut. Tomorrow was about to be very interesting...

BEEP BEEP BEEP

I opened my eyes to find my room dark, and my phone reading 6:30am "ughhh" I groaned rolling out the warm covers and slowly made my way into my bathroom, I switched the light on and then put the shower on, turning the heat to the warmest it could be, sleepily I pulled my clothes off and jumped into the shower humming as the water washed over my skin. My morning went quick, at one point it was 7am and I need to still pack and now its 8am and my front door is being knocked because Colby is already here "shit shit shit" I chanted quickly stuffing chargers, torches, batteries and whatever else I could quickly grab before I sprinted to the door "morning!" I panted

"good morning, you okay?" he laughed putting a hand on my shoulder

"fi-fine yeah" I smiled standing to look at him properly "you good?" he nodded walking in "I've just gotta put a few last things in my bag, wanna come sit in my room?"

"oooh" he cooed, I slapped his arm as we made our way to my room, he walked in and quickly jumped onto the bed that was freshly made and crumpled the sheets which I made a face to, a cheeky smirk painted the tatted mans face as he shuffled creating a larger mess "you excited?"

"oh yeah- cant wait" I sarcastically answered grabbing my card "how like- bad is it?" I asked which I probably shouldn't have with the wide smile that crept onto the mans face

"well its known to have had 6 people hang themselves in the attic, two of those were children like 10 years old" my stomach sank, eyes widened "i'm kidding! only one 10 year old was hung" I sighed again regretting agreeing to going to this place and mentally slapping myself

"you're not helping the nerves I have right now" he laughed lying himself back, grabbing a pillow to go under his head "what are you grabbing from the shop?"

"water, snacks, any like little bits we need, plus were not filming it so we don't need much, oh and Amanda is coming, you guys will get on great" I smiled, I had seen Amanda in a few videos with the guys before and she seems really fun and interesting to work with as she's a medium

"okay well I'm ready now" with a breath he stood, fixing my bed and giving the pillow a slap to make it 'comfy', I pulled my little suitcase of the bed and onto the floor to follow me

"you'll love It once were there" Colby spoke grabbing my bag off me, carrying it down the stairs and walked to his car to put it in his trunk as I locked my door

"I've been told that one to many times" we shared a look before a laugh spilled from both of us

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The shopping was done, some water, crisps, and some lollipops, I sat myself in the front and waited patiently for Colby to get back in "oh another thing- one of the spirits at this place has a thing for touching girls backs and leaving like little bruises"

"great! gonna get molested by a ghost man" I grinned sarcastically looking to the dark haired boy "as long as I don't get like pushed down stairs or something I'm good-ish"

"well-"

"ugh" Colby laughed starting the car, sending me a quick smirk before we drove back to his house. It was a quiet drive, only the radio playing some songs, and the noises of traffic around us, It was defiantly the calm before the storm tonight.

We arrived at the house and went inside, I saw Sam and a blonde sat on the sofa talking but quickly stopping as we entered "Ayyyy she's here!" the man called holding his hands in the air "Amanda this is Y/n, Y/n this is Amanda" I looked to the girl

"hey how are you!" she asked sending me a warm smile, she was really pretty, dressed in a white knitted jumper, blue skinny jeans

"hi i'm great, how're you?" she looked a little taken-back but still with a smile

"Oh you're British?" I nodded "ohh- where are you from?"

"Y/H/T (if you're not from England just chose somewhere to be from), grew up there then moved to Kansas when I was like 14" she smiled and looked back to Sam, I turned to Colby who was stood leaning up the door way staring back to me "what?" I mouthed and he shook his head with a smile

"right guys, we need to leave like in 5 minuets, it's a 4 hour drive- and I have to drive" he groaned "who's sitting in the front with me?" I watched as Amanda quickly placed a finger onto her nose "Amanda is sat with me then!" she grinned grabbing her bag

"Looks like were together then" I said looking to the dark headed man still behind me, he giggled before quickly hurrying away to the stairs and went up, he's so weird sometimes "okay before we go ima go for a piss" Sam threw me a thumbs up and I went to the bathroom. I finished and washed my hands, I looked into the mirror and stared at my make-up, I hadn't put much on but my lips looked slightly chapped so I pulled out my lip gloss and swiped it onto my lips, with one last look I walked out and was met with the blue eye gaze of Colby

"that for me?" he looked to my lips and back up

"of course" I smiled, biting my lip jokingly, I walked past hitting his shoulder slightly, but the feeling of his grip on me pulled me back to be in front of him, I turned to look to his face but he nodded to his free hand, the one not still holding my other hand that was gently drawing circles on with his thumb, I looked to his hands and saw him holding something "whats that?" he opened his palm and revealed two cross necklaces

"one for me and this one is for you" I smiled at the gesture taking mine from his hand and putting it into my pocket, but that made me think- how bad will this place be if I need to wear a cross...

"right come on were going!" Sam called and hurriedly I grabbed my bags to now put in his Tesla, we didn't all have that much, just some extra clothes, food, drinks, and equipment for the investigations we'd be doing, everything was in and I climbed into the left side of the car, fastened my belt and took off my shoes getting comfy, Amanda got in after me and turned to me passing me a bag of something

"try one!" she offered, my hand dipped into the purple bag and pulled out a yellow boiled sweet "mango and passionfruit" my eyes widened at the tase, it was great

"holy shit" I laughed "please tell me you have another bag?"

"I have three- they're my favourite sweet in literal world" we high-fived in agreement and she sat back into her seat, the boys joined us, Sam in the front, Colby with me. As the car turned on some random song began to play which Colby let a huff out, throwing his head back in some sort of protest

"Dude put something good on" he complained "put- Christina Aguilera on" Sam flicked his head back to his best friend who just shrugged

"why her?" he asked with a confused grin

"first name that came to mind" Soon the sweet voice Christina came on and our journey began, I went into my pocket pulling out my phone, flicked onto snapchat and quickly felt my phone pulled from my hands and Colby turned the screen to him "pose bitch" he yelped, I quickly sat forward putting my hand on his shoulder and my head rested next to his, he thew up a peace sign and the picture was taken "I look so sexy"

"sure you do" I sat back feeling the gaze of him fall on me, crossing my legs and letting my head fall back "so whats up with this place? I asked this dickhead and he told me basically people hung themselves and me and Amanda might get touched by a ghosty man" the group laughed before the girl in front turned to me

"okay so the house is called Elgor Manor House, it was passed through around like six generations of the Sails family, the one of the last known member of the house walked out to find a women stood at the gates, she said she had red-ish eyes, very boney and long dark hair yelling it was on fire, and when she turned around she saw smoke and flames eating the house, she ran in to try find her children and they were found in the hall crying pointing to the attic, she supposedly ran up and found the attic door open and matches up there- her husband Charles Sails had done it" I nodded taking in all the information "Charles was known to have some mental issues... so assumed, but she said when she saw him, his eyes were black, skin very white, and his shirt was ripped open and where his heart was a huge red mark was there, like as if he'd been clawed. Cherrie, the mom then just ran out with her children but sadly- 3 out the 5 died but when she got out the women wasn't there but Cherrie believed it was a saviour as without that women she would've been able to save the children she did despite her appearance being quite devil like- thats what she told the newspaper anyways, and then she died about a year later; Charles was never seen again so he was told to be dead, and then the 2 children she escaped with both were mysteriously shot two days apart the day after their mothers death" my jaw dropped "all under 18 years old too" I couldn't believe what I herd, and Amanda just nodded

"fuck- when did that all happen?"

"1926, but thats not even the weirdest bit, Charles' great granddad, Stephan Sails was told to always let the children start fires around the land as if they got out of hand many times it resulted in some servant dying and never landed back on him, there's still a tree there thats all ashy, but anyways, the way he died was getting into the attic, and then there was a fire, and when they found his body- even though he was so badly burnt- there was a huge red mark over where his heart was" Sam added, pulling to a stop at a light "the odd thing is though, so many people died in that attic, Charles, Stephan, the other 4 and then one of those were a girl named Marlie, from what we know she was about 10 and was Stephans Grandmothers sister, and she was found hanging off the 6th rafter with a rope, wrapped 6 times on her neck, and 6 of her toys surrounding her, and one of those toys still remain in the house after the fires and over about 200 years" I sat astonished, no words able to leave my mouth

"so 6th rafters, 6 times around her neck and 6 toys around her? could this mean something maybe... took over her? because well 666 is the devils number" Amanda agreed sending me a knowing look "holy shit" I breathed

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"anyone hungry?" Sam asked looking back at everyone "there's a McDonald's over there" we all agreed to go grab something to eat, we still had a while to go till we got to the house anyways, the blonde pulled into the car park and all got out. The four of us walked in and went straight to the touch screens

"whats everyone having?" Colby asked, Sam quickly chose his food and Colby went after him, Amanda went next then me "ooh they have ice cream" he hummed in a childish tone, clapping his hands excitingly

"shall we all get one?" I asked and everyone nodded, so I added 4. I grabbed the receipt, me and Amanda stood waiting at the counter for the food while the other two went to find a table

"so how did you get to know the boys?" she asked

"oh I joined there school when I was 14, so... freshman year? because I had just moved from Y/H/T to Kansas because my mom got a job there, and I was in a few lessons with Colby but I was mostly with Sam, and they knew each other because of band that they were forced to do, then we started talking more and more until I found out we didn't live that far apart, started going to Sam's more, Colby was there a lot and then yeah, just stayed being their friends and we all moved here together but I bought a little place like 5 minuets away" she nodded, grabbing the one bag of food while I grabbed the two trays of drinks and ice cream

"to be completely honest when I first herd about you it was through Colby and I thought you guys were together from how he was saying it, he kept smiling while thinking of things to tell me and showed me photos of you, even blushed when I said you were pretty but I can see you two are just like really good friends" we laughed as I shut down the allegations, we were just best friends, every best friend sometimes have little flirty games together right?. We found the guys sat in a window seat laughing over something and me and Amanda sat across from them

"Whats funny?" I asked passing out the drinks

"just watching you two gossip like girls at school" Sam giggled red faced, him and Colby began impersonating us with high pitch squeals, I looked to the girl next to me and we just sighed ignoring them.

We all finished and got back into the car, I flicked my shoes off again and placed my legs over Colby who gave a stare to which I just smiled, placing my hoodie behind my head and laying back "really?"

"mhm" I yawned closing my eyes "feel free to give me a massage" he pretend heaved, but still placed his arms over my legs leaning back himself, the feeling of his rings felt cold against my skin, even through my jeans as he softly rubbed my legs. Slowly my body began to feel lighter, and the chatter and music became quieter.

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"Y/n.... Y/n/n" my eyes fluttered opened to the smiling face of Colby "we're here" he sung pulling me up, I turned to look out the window and saw the sign, a concrete block engraved with 'Elgor Manor' and soon the house came into sight. Sam parked the car and we all got out, a chill ran down my spine despite the warmth of the day. The exterior of the house seemed to loom over us, casting an eerie shadow across the grounds. The structure, though grand, appeared worn and weathered, as if the weight of centuries pressed upon its dark, aged wooden frame.

Massive, gnarled trees surrounded the property, their branches reaching out like skeletal fingers, seemingly trying to grasp onto the last remnants of life. The overgrown bushes and tangled ivy obscured much of the house, adding to its air of neglect and foreboding. The windows, adorned with tattered, moth-eaten curtains. Despite the expanse of land stretching out around the manor, it felt suffocatingly claustrophobic, The overall appearance was not shabby but uncannily surreal, as if the passage of time had twisted the reality of the place. It was as though I had stepped into a realm where the laws of nature and perception bent in unsettling ways.

"woah" I sighed "this is....creepy but beautiful" I spoke looking back to the group, they nodded staring back to the home, soon the noise off tires scraping along the rubble drive appeared behind us, we all turned and were greeted with two people, one walked up, a grin put across his thin lips covered by a white beard, his matching long hair tied into a pony tail, the next to come out was a women, black hair, freckles, and bright red lipstick painted on her lips, with a pearly white beaming smile.

"Hey there!" the man greeted shaking all our hands "I'm Jack, this is my wife Mary and welcome to Elgor Manor" his wife came over shaking our hands again then finding a spot next to her husband "so Elgor Manor, is a very very old house, built around 1798 from what we know, past through many generations of the Sails family but nobody has lived here since 1940's, We found out in about 2020, our friend, Timothy, is actually a distant relative of this family, he was Charles Sails fourth great-grandchild and his great-aunt was the last to own the house-which is now a great new fact we can tell you all" he laughed

"yeah we've herd so much about this place its crazy the history behind it." Colby spoke to the two "We herd about Charles and Stephan"

"Oh oh- they're just the start of it all, its when you hear Marlie's story and her mother Carol-Anne" we all went quiet "you haven't herd about her have you?" we all shook our head no "you'll learn" I gulped, a cold feeling running through me "what're all your names by the way?" Mary asked

"Y/n"

"Colby"

"Amanda"

"Sam" she smiled nodding

"so Y/n, Amanda- you being girls need to be careful tonight, if you go into the back dining room or sometimes in one of the bedrooms there's a man there, his name is Christopher Sails- he was very well known around here for being quiet the player, a playboy you may say in the late 1800" Me and Amanda shared a look, one of slight fear "he's known for touching girls back, leaving marks, and sometimes you may feel your cheeks get warm but then in the middle cold- thats him giving you a kiss... but he is... nice... just be- careful" she sounded slight unsure, I gave a look to Sam who sent me a small unsettled thin lip smile

"well we will get to the tour -we are going to quickly unlock the doors but anyways after that we can take you round!" Jack smiled walking away with his wife, Sam and Amanda went back to the car to grab different bags and I turned back to Colby

"I am terrified" he laughed wrapping an arm around me, giving me a slight squeeze "if I get fucked by a ghost or some shit I'm going home"

"eh don't worry- a ghost wont fuck you" I looked up to the man who smiled back

"who will then?" I hummed walking away from him feeling his eyes follow my moves

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It was time to go into the house, Colby and Amanda went in first and me and Sam followed behind, we walked into the hall and it was grand, gold accents everywhere, two huge mirrors, little objects protected by glass coverings "this part has been restored to how it would've been in 1910's, as you can see lots of gold and dark oak, this rug you see here has been here since 1890 and has been seen to move or make noise like its being slapped against the floor which is what the maids would've done" The couple went into another room, one with green-washed walls, plaster pulling from the walls, two sofas, wooden details decorating the outline, and a TV, we were told about the objects that have been told to move, especially one called Jessies Glass, it was a piece of glass with some spikes coming out

"so this is Jessies glass, so you see all the spikes- this was used agaisnst misbehaving children and staff, either they would stand on It or it was pushed into their backs" Mary commented making all of us do a collective groan "we've had experiences of people hearing screams by children and mostly maids as the heads of the house would usually punish those who didn't do their job right"

We carried on the tour around the house till we reached the last door on the third floor, it was shut, locked and had a sign reading 'Do not enter' I didn't even have a handle "so this is the staircase upto the attic. Obviously where Charles, Stephan, Marlie and others died" we nodded looking back to the ominous door "just- don't go up" we all nodded again and followed the guides down the stairs back to the last room

"think they'll know if we go up?" I hushed Colby who had a playful smirk twitching the sides of his lips "I know we all thought it" he whispered as we walked

We all walked into the dining room and stood around the grand oak table "so see that rocking chair in the corner, thats Christopher's, he's not here right now but That'll start rocking when he's in. He usually -in the day visits the yard, sits in the swinging sofa" all our eyes cast a gaze outside to the yard "mh doesn't seem to be out there either- odd" Mary spoke "well, thats everything, please call if you need anything, keys on the table so yes, just be careful, and respectful"

"thank you" Amanda spoke, the couple said a quick goodbye before leaving us in the house, we went back to our car pulling out all our things: EMF reader, music box, tap torches, spirt box and cat balls, then our things "Y/n wanna stay in one of the rooms up stairs or down here?"

"I think we need to sleep upstairs"

She agreed and the two of us ended up running up two the second floor "which room, Yellow or blue do you think?"

"oh defiantly blue!" as I spoke I herd a dismissive noise from below "what was that?"

"we want the blue room!" Sam yelled coming up the stairs "it's literally the most active, you herd what Jack said- we want it"

"we've already dibbed it" I sassed looking to the blonde

"fuck you" he pouted walking back down the staircase "Colby they're having the blue room"

"NU UH!" the other groaned as a smile crept on mine and Amanda's faces as we placed our things on the bed

"tonight it going to be amazing, do you see anything yet?" I spoke out of interest as I pulled on my hoodie

"no not yet, not even had any feelings either- might just have to wait a bit" I hummed listening to her explanation "why don't we go into the garden, see if Christopher is out there?" quickly we made our way down the stairs and into the kitchen to get to the garden, we stepped out and the warm air hit us, my eyes looked to the swinging seat, it was still.

"maybe we should try sitting there" I spoke making my own way to the cushioned seat, I sat back looking round while Amanda came over, I swayed gently on the swinging bench, my gaze wanders across the garden, taking in the peculiar blend of beauty and eerie ambiance that surrounds me. The garden appears deceptively tranquil at first glance, with an abundance of vibrant flowers in full bloom. Lush, colourful petals dance in the gentle breeze, painting a picturesque scene that should be serene.

The fragrance of the flowers hangs thick in the air, a delightful mixture of sweet scents that should evoke joy, yet there's an underlying sense of foreboding. It's as if the very essence of the garden is intertwined with an unspoken mystery, a silent narrative woven between the petals and leaves. Then I see a pond, the pond, nestled amidst the blossoms, reflects the azure sky above, mirroring the beauty of the day. Yet, despite the shimmering water's surface, there's a certain depth that seems to hold secrets, as if it conceals more than just fish and lily pads beneath.

"its really nice for a place thats meant to be extremely haunted" the girl spoke next to me "maybe... maybe it wont be bad" I hummed relaxing more into the seat

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The time ticked away, 2pm, 5pm and then the time finally hit 9pm "nothings even happened" Sam groaned "we've been around the whole house with all the equipment and nothing this is so stupid" The four of us had sat In the living room, Amanda in the arm chair, Sam, and Colby on the two seater and I sat on the floor flicking through channels on the TV "I mean even you haven't seen anything" he argued, I finally settled on some random sitcom and sat back leaning against Colby's leg for support

"it might just take some time" the brunette behind spoke

"fuck it taking time- we've been here since fucking 1:30 and nothing, I'm calling bullshit" Sam got up from his place and stormed into the kitchen grabbing a water bottle and basically gulping the whole thing muttering some words, I looked back to Colby who gave me a smirk then looked back to the TV

"well I'm gonna go change" Amanda said standing "come?" she gave her hand to me, pulling me up to meet her height, still in hand we began to go up the stairs, running like children to our room "Sam is so pissed off"

"I know, I've never seen him like this" I laughed pulling off my jumper "like he's never this angr-" I was cut my a creaking sound, then a thump "fuck was that?"

"probably the guys?" she spoke walking to the door "Sam?! Colby?!" she called, no response, then another bang- above us

"that was upstairs..." quickly I pulled my hoody back over me and walked out the room up the small crooked staircase, I looked down the hall, Amanda stood close behind me "nothings moved-"

"Y/n- there's a little girl, ran into the door down there" the blondes voice was small "red hair, blue bows, light blue dress" I looked to where she was gesturing to

"that...no- that fucking door is open" my heart sank "we need to grab the guys" the two of us hurried down the first flight of stairs then the second "the doors open!"

"what door?" Colby asked sitting up

"the door with no shitting handle and the don't enter sign" we all shared a look before they quickly came up past us running to the door, I quickly grabbed the Rempod and followed, switching it on so It was ready when we got to the door. I crept up the steps and was met with the back of Colby, I let my arm creep around his waist

"FU-fucking hell Y/n" he breathed turning to look at me, I gave him a quick sorry smile before squeezing past with the Rempod, I walked past the other two and went face to face with the door "be careful" he warned

"If there is anyone here... please touch this antenna" I spoke stopping the conversation between the two blondes , I took a few steps back looking at the machine intensely "we're not here to cause any stress, harm, anything negative- just want to talk" I spoke again. the box began to beep, red light flashing, I took a glance back to the group who's faces lightened "who are we talking to, erm can you touch once for a child, twice for adult" and there again it beeped once

"she's back- behind the door" I looked up facing the door, slowly I went to my knees, holding a warm smile on my face

"hi" I whispered and the box buzzed again "are you Marlie?" everyone went quiet "Marlie Sails?" the Rempod beeped again, I tried to not seem terrified and kept my stance, hands shaking by my sides

"She's gone... I'm guessing up the stairs" I stood going to take a step through the door

"wait" a hand gripped my forearm, I felt all the cold rings press against my skin, the same familiar feeling from earlier in the car "be careful- have you got your cross?" I nodded going into my pocket and pulling out, Colby took the necklace from my grip and gently moved my hair to the side, lifting the dainty metal over my head and clipped it around my neck "okay" I looked back seeing a tent pushed into his cheek, eyes low looking to me, sending me an unspoken message, Slowly, I pulled the door open more listening as it creaked, revealing deformed, water-damaged steps that ascended steeply to the attic. Each step groaned and protested beneath my weight, as if the old wooden structure itself was begging me to turn back.

With each step, the protest of the wood grew louder, a cacophony of distress that reverberated through the dimly lit corridor. The air felt heavy and suffocating, as if the very walls were watching, waiting for my next move.

Reaching the top, a chill slithered down my spine, instantly sending shivers across my skin. The attic lay engulfed in darkness, besides the faint glimmer of moonlight that seeped through a small window, casting elongated shadows that danced along the floor.

I squinted into the darkness, my eyes adjusting slowly. Shapes emerged, barely visible in the dim light, and among them, the faint outlines of rafters became visible. Counting softly, my voice barely audible in the oppressive silence, "One, two, three, four, five... six." My gaze fixed on the sixth rafter to my right, the very beam from which Marlie's life had been stolen. As I extended my hand to touch the wood, a shiver of uncertainty coursed through me. "You were so young," my voice quivered, barely louder than a whisper. "Why?" The words hung in the air, swallowed by the quietness of the attic.

A sudden change in the atmosphere sent a wave of warmth around me, a stark contrast to the chilling aura just moments before. My hair prickled on the back of my neck, standing as if trying to flee the unseen force that enveloped me. "Is... is that you, Marlie?" I stammered, my voice faltering as the air grew thicker, charged with an otherworldly energy.

"Y/n? everything okay?" Amanda called, I turned my head to look down the staircase where her voice was coming from

"can you come up?" I asked and herd the quiet steps coming up the stairs and then the face of the blonde girl appeared, her smile quickly dropped "what?"

"the little girl is down there- by the window" I turned my head looking to the window, it seemed blurred unlike before "she's looking directly at you"

"H-hi Marlie" I spoke "how are you?" I felt my stomach flip, my head going misty "does she look- happy?" I asked and Amanda looked back her eyes flicking around the girl

"she seems- okay? not happy but not anything else, almost emotionless, I...oh" my head went back to Amanda who seemed worried herself "she's gone"

I felt a cold chill run through my body as if something walked through me "shit" I spoke feeling my body quiver "shall we go back down?" I asked seeing Amanda's shadow nod, we began back down the staircase, we left the last step and looked to the two boys who stood silent looking to us "she was up there"

"I've never seen something like that- so....so clear" Amanda breathed scratching her head

"Marlie?" Sam asked and we nodded "woah- maybe we should take the spirtbox up, or at least stand here and do it, maybe she could speak?" we all agreed, Sam hurried down the stairs to the first room grabbing the things

"I need a drink before we do this" Amanda spoke looking to us "you guys want one?"

"please" I spoke looking back to the door, the girls footsteps wondered away leaving me and Colby again "this is crazy"

"Are you alright?" His words were barely audible, whispered with a gentle concern that wrapped around me like a comforting embrace. His arm extended slowly, encircling my waist and drawing me closer. I hummed softly, shifting my gaze toward him "you had me worried going up there" and a wave of reassurance washed over me as I met his eyes. There, I found a small but warm grin gracing his lips, instantly soothing my unease and bringing a sense of safety and care. Our eyes met, his piercing blue ones looking into my Y/C/E, Our breaths seemed to halt as we watched each other, our faces inching closer and closer, my heart stopped, falling but in the best way possible "can I-"

"Y/n grabbed you a water" hurriedly we pulled away, turning to see Amanda holding three waters, and Sam not far behind "have you felt anything since?" she asked handing my the bottle, I couldn't tell her the hot feeling that ran through my body was because I was close to kissing my best friend of 13 years

"er- no, nothing" I answered quietly pulling away from the man next to me to grab the bottle

"mh strange" she spoke

･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

The four of us now sat in a small circle as the clock struck 3:30am, little tea lights surrounding us, the spirit box in the middle "anyone wanna do the Estes method?" Sam asked

"can I try?" I wondered seeing everyones eyes flick to mine

"are you sure?" Colby said, I nodded picking up the blind fold and bringing it to my eyes, I held it behind me and faced my back to the brunette boy, he took the silky material out my hand, slowly he tied the knot and it tightened to my head "okay here are the headphones" he put the pair in my hands and I put them on, the static noises filling my ears almost defining me, I kept listening waiting for some words

"up..........tight..........sick..........momma..........help me..........waiting..........Rosa..........Dining room..........blue..........you..........Samual..........ten..........no care..........duck..........help..........kill..........he did..........made me..........devil man..........father..........fire" My breath began to pick up, chest heaving up and down, my body rocking trying to catch breath, 'he made us die' voices breathed into my ear I ripped the headphones from my head, pulled the material from my eyes "fuck that" I shuffled back from my place clutching the sofa behind me

"what what happened?" Sam looked to me with slight panic in his eyes

"something- something whispered 'he made us die' in only the left ear- and it was like multiple voices said it" I cried, eyes filling with tears "like a little girl and loads of others too but I could hear her the most"

"we do think it was Marlie we were talking to a lot" Amanda said gently, my lip kept quivering, I couldn't stop it was all to real "I saw her twice, peaking around the door" I smiled weakly

"need a break?" Colby spoke, I nodded I really needed some air, I got up walking to the front door and stepping out onto the porch, I let myself hang over the railing catching my breath while wiping away the tears that kept falling down my cheeks, I looked out into the pitch black landscape "drink?" I freaked turning to see the tatted man holding my water bottle

"thanks" I breathed taking a sip "that was terrifying" the warm feeling of his hand cupped my back, standing closely behind me, comforting me after the fright. I sucked another breath and leaned into him resting my head on his shoulder

"every question we asked got answered you know- but at one point you started rocking and...eh doesn't matter" I looked up to him, questioning him with my eyes "I was gonna grab you but didn't wanna ruin the experiment... yeah the experiment " he answered avoiding my gaze

"mh, maybe you should next time" I followed looking back to the darkness

"only if you let me" he whispered into the shell of my ear making my body go from freezing to burning

"maybe I will" I teased, I turned to meet his gaze, a smile teasing the corners of my lips. "So, what were you going to ask me earlier, upstairs?" I inquired, leaning in slightly, feeling a rush of excitement as Colby's head fell closer to mine, our breaths meeting in the air between us. Our lips were tantalisingly close, the anticipation crackling like electricity, a teasing tension building with each passing moment.

"you really wanna know?" I hummed, nodding my head gently "I was wondering if maybe I could-" before he finished his sentence another person walked out

"oh should I" Sam coughed, we tore apart going away from the sides of each other "erm me and Amanda are gonna go to bed its like 4 am so" I pulled my jumper straight and gave the blonde boy a quick smile

"yeah I'll go up- night guys" I said quickening my pace back into the house and up to mine and Amanda's room "hey" I called walking in

"hi- feeling better?" she asked settling into the sheets

"much" I grinned going to the bed and pulling my side open "first day meeting and already in bed together" I joked hearing a laugh come from the girl "anyways goodnight" I smiled one last time before I turned my lamp off and closed my eyes

"night"

･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

"Y/n....Y/n" I heard a whisper shout in my ear "wake up.... Y/n please" my eyes flickered open "someones in here" her voice was small

"what..who?" I asked sitting up, the room was pitch black, I grabbed my phone turning on the flashlight "one of the guys?"

"no...well its a man, he's In the corner watching" I turned my head to the corner of the room, shining my light there and there it was again a hazy mist "Y/n I see things like this but he seems different- I cant get anything from him, he seems.. I don't even know"

"shall we leave?" I asked pushing the covers off my body

"yeah- erm let me just grab my paper quickly" rapidly I left the bed, grabbing my jumper I seemed to have taken off and waited for Amanda to come to me, she followed me as we left the room and went next door, I pushed opened the door to reveal the two sleeping boys tucked untidily in the sheets "should we wake them up?"

"yeah- Sam, Colby" I called seeing neither of them shift, I went over to the bed shaking Sam by his shoulder and his eyes opened

"what the fuck Y/n- what?" his whispered, voice full of sleep "its like- 6 in the morning" the covers on the other side shifted and a murmur came from the boys mouth

"Amanda saw a man in our room" I spoke being quieter, I turned back to see the girl sat In the small desk chair looking to her notepad

"what do you mean? a real man?" Colby spoke up, the covers fell from him showing his toned body

"no- it was an older guy, green robe, little hair, and like I kept getting the words like 'ladies' 'kiss' and 'beauty'" Amanda told with a breath

"sounds like that Christopher guy" I shook my head feeling my cheek go hot then cold in the middle "Y/n whats wrong"

"I think you're right" I answered "he kissed me, like I felt what Mary or whatever told us" I sat myself on the bed setting back onto the frame "my cheek felt hot then ice cold In the middle"

"why has he followed you guys into here though? he must really like you" as soon as Sam finished a huge bang rattled the house "fuck was that" he called

"did you follow the girls in here Christopher?" Colby asked "Knock once for no, knock twice for yes" we all went quiet listening to the two thumps that filled the room

"you have no right to touch us- don't ever do that again" Amanda warned, her tone slick with anger "its wrong to follow girls like that- or anyone for that matter. Never do that again you hear me Christopher" the sound of footsteps rattled through and soon faded down the stairs, he left thankfully

"fucking hate this so much" I muttered looking to my phone, I unlocked it I switched onto snapchat, soon the dark outline of Sam Colby appeared on my screen "smile" I voiced, trying to take my mind from everything thats happened seeing the two sleepily posed and I pressed the button snapping a picture, it loaded back onto my screen and I went to look "no- fucking - way!"

"what?!" the three asked scrambling over to see, I pointed to in-between the two "is that a face?" Sam yelled, hands gripping to his hair, and there it was two eyes, nose and mouth "who is that?"

"let me see" Amanda said taking my phone "it looks like...Carol-Anne? like the painting in the living room, thats gotta be her"

"we never learnt anything about her" I spoke "is that you, Carol-Anne?" I felt a nudge next to me "oh" I called looking over my shoulder "is that a yes?" I felt the push again "Okay- erm why don't we get the spirt box out again" I said

"yeah but no Estes this time" Sam answered going into his bag and pulling at the box switching it on, the static taking me back to only a few hours earlier

"what happened to you?" I asked

"daddy" we all looked to each other

"your dad did something?"

"push"

"he pushed you? where did he push you?" Amanda asked grabbing her note book again writing something dow

"woods"

"pushed you into the woods?"

"dark...cold"

"where in the woods did it happen?" I questioned

"grave"

"holy shit was she buried alive?" I turned to Colby who's jaw was open

"yes"

"OH MY GOD" we all called horrified by the response

"why?"

"Naughty baby" it answered

"naughty baby? maybe she was looking after the baby and it did something?"

"moved"

"did you hurt it by accident?"

"poorly head" my eyes widened "speak no more" it finished and the static got louder and louder

"fucking hell" I sighed "well thank you" Sam reached over turning off he box

"well I'm not sleeping anymore" we all laughed "and why dod everything touch me!" I called flopping down into the bed

･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

the time ticked by until it reached 9am, we all decided to get ready for the day and wait down stairs until Jack and Mary returned, Me and Sam sat slouched in the living room looking around at the different history in the room "did we ever check if that other door closed? the one in the attic?" I asked looking up the the blonde

"me and Col checked- its closed and I couldn't even pull it back open.. do we tell the owners it opened?"

"maybe but just don't say me and Amanda went up" I told sitting back up "speaking of I think they're here" together we got up, watched as their range drover pulled onto the gravel drive

"Hi guys" Jack called walking into the house with Mary in hand, we all greeted the pair again before they led us to sit in the dining room. I pulled a chair between Amanda and Colby, across from the couple

"So what happened?" Mary spoke crossing her hands

"well nothing happened till about 9pm, erm me and Manda went to change or something up stairs and then we herd a massive noise from the third floor... we went up to see and you know the do not enter door?"

"did- did it open?" Jack asked with a worried tone

"mhm and we promise we did nothing to it, we hadn't touched it or anything, we put the Rempod there and it beeped, and I saw a little girl, red hair, blue bows..."

"Marlie- she doesn't come round much" Mary smiled "did she speak to you? she's often very shy" we all nodded telling her what we knew "was there anyone else?"

"we had Marlie, Christopher and Carol-Anne" Colby answered "can you tell us what actually happened with her before we tell you what she said?"

"sure, so she was the mother of Marlie, Kelsie-Rose, Robert and a toddler we believe the name was Marcus or Marc, one day while looking after the children she was struggling and Marcus kept misbehaving and while in her arms and she dropped him and he passed out but her father caught it happen, bare in mind she was 20 with 4 children, and her father was so angry he made the servants of the house dig a grave in the woods and she was buried alive because of it on January 9th, but the wood was chopped away for the garden and her grave is actually in the pond" my heart skipped- I knew there was something wrong with that pond

"thats what she told us" I said, my voice barely above a whisper

"its a horrible story- poor girl" Mary told looking down "when did she tell you?"

"this morning, around 6ish"

"thats when it happened, 6am she was buried, we found it in a diary that was brought up from the old basement- obviously that basement is gone now though" the group as a whole let out a breath, one of pure shock

"fuck" Sam groaned

Soon it was time to go, we all went up grabbing our stuff saying our good byes to the house, Jack and Mary too, we all went out to Sam's car, putting all our things into the back. I opened my door getting into my back seat and looked to the floor, the same sweets from the day before, I picked up the pack tipping a few into my lap.

"guys were going to do no stops so if you need a piss then fuck it" Sam called staring his car

Soon everyone was settled in and the trip began again, Colby looked over to me sending a quick smile my way as I toyed with the sweet pack in my lap , I handed him a sweet and he happily opened it putting it into his mouth

"good?" he nodded letting his head fall back leaning onto the window "I'm so tired" I jawed, Colby looked over to me again, patting his lap "you sure?" he nodded not sharing any words but turning himself to be comfier for me, I leant down letting my head rest on Colby's thigh "goodnight" I joked, I closed my eyes feeling a soothing warmth come over me, subtly I felt Colbys hand stroke down my arm, stopping near my wrist and his other going to my scalp drawing small circles around my head, slowly I felt myself become lighter and soon I was fast asleep

･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

"look at them" someone spoke "they're gonna laugh at this when they're awake" someone else said, my eyes flittered open to the two smiling, staring faces of the two blondes "hello" Sam cooed

"mor-morning" I hummed stretching slightly, my hand hit something and I looked up to see the other sleeping face of Colby above me, I couldn't stop the shy smile from appearing on my face "Col" I called shaking him slightly

"no babe I'm tired" he muttered turning away, my heart stopped 'babe'? he was asleep, he didn't know he said it.. but everyone else herd

"he's gonna regret saying that" Sam sinisterly grinned with a wicked laugh

finally we all got out, Colby sleepily shuffled inside the house, scratching his hair out his face "that went fast" he huffed falling onto the sofa

"indeed it did babe" Sam giggled looking to me and back to Colby

"what?" he spoke looking to us

"nothing- anyways I've gotta take Amanda to the airport" I looked to the blonde girl who pouted coming over to me, I wrapped my arms around her

"thanks for the last day it was so cool, and it was great meeting you, we'll, have to hang out again" I grinned coming away

"absolutely! I loved this so much, see you soon Colby" the boy stood hugging her too and we both waved goodbye as Sam and her pulled away, we both walked back into the living room flopping into the couch with a sigh

"gonna come to the next haunted place?" he spoke looking over to me

"hm maybe- just don't wanna be kissed by a random ghosty man again though" I giggled facing Colby again, I hadn't noticed how close we were, our shoulders grazing against each others, faces inches away

"maybe you could get kissed by someone else?" he questioned, eyes falling to my lips then back up to me "...can I tell you what I tried to tell you this morning?" I nodded, no words able to leave my mouth "I was wondering if maybe I could...if I could kiss you?" I looked to the boy, paralysed by his words

"yes please" I answered, it came out my breathy then I imagined but the smile that crept onto the boys face made me realise it wasn't a bad thing. Gently Colby's hand slithered up to my jaw, cupping my face pulling me in lightly

His breath hitched, a low, deep moan escaping as our lips melded. It was a soft collision, yet every touch carried an electric charge, as though our mouths were destined to be together. Each motion felt instinctual, a choreographed dance of desire. Sensing Colby's longing, his tongue traced a path along my lips, a silent plea for entry that I welcomed eagerly. The kiss intensified, a symphony of heat and passion, a growing ache in my stomach got so much needier.

My actions became thoughtless, almost instinctive as I straddled him, our connection unbroken. ''God, you're incredible'' he murmured, his hands finding their place on my waist, his voice a deep, gravelly whisper that sent shivers down my spine. The air crackled with an intoxicating blend of desire and appreciation, his lips moved from my lips to my jaw and then my neck

"Mhmm Co-Colby" I whined as he reached the sweet spot, hearing my sigh he kept going, sucking deeper and harder "agh fuck" my hands gripped his shoulders, scrunching into his shirt, my back arching making me come away from his lips

"if you keep acting like this we might need to go somewhere else" I smiled looking down to the boy "my room?" he spoke and I just nodded jumping from his lap watching him intently as he stood grabbing me again, lifting me to meet his lips, I curled my arms around his neck pulling him as close as I could.

We began climbing the stairs, Colby's hands keeping me steady around his waist until we reached the top, he set me down softly and my hands went quickly down to his waist, fingers curling around his his shirt lifting it above his head and threw it to the floor, his actioned mirrored mine, my shirt quickly being on top if his crumpled on the floor, his hands quickly found the underneath of my thighs again and lifted me up carrying to his room.

"you're so beautiful" he whispered, as he set me on his bed, my fingers went to my jeans, pushing the button out the hole and soon down my legs and onto the floor, as soon as they were off Colby crawled above me, eyes eating every inch of me "look at you" he cooed, hand drawing up the side of me until it met my bra

"take it off?" I teased, a playful glint sparkling in my eyes as I curved a seductive smile on my lips. A subtle nod from him and I propped myself up, stealing a swift kiss before turning around. I could feel the warmth of his gentle fingers as they skillfully unhooked my bra, his lips tracing a tantalizing path against my bare skin, sending shivers down my spine. I turned to meet his gaze again, a coy expression playing on my face, silently inviting him to continue

"holy shit" He gazed in awe, his eyes tracing down my body as his head dipped closer. With a delicate motion, his lips caressed my breast, the tantalizing touch of his tongue flicking along my nipple sent shivers cascading down my spine, igniting a thrilling sensation that lingered

"fuck fuck fuck" I sang as he sucked harder his hand massaging the other "Colby- please fuck I need you" I cried, hand wrapping into his hair pulling him up "please" I begged, I pulled his hand from my waist to my heat letting him feel my need, his pricing eyes glared into mine with the most lustful grin play along his lips

"shit" he smirked, quickly he stood pulling down his cargos revealing the tent that had formed in his boxers that were tightly pulled on his skin, he sat back onto the bed and I couldn't help but crawl onto him again, my heat meeting his bulge, my lips went to his jaw, sucking as sweet mumbles fell from his lips. Unintentionally I let my hips grind against his, I couldn't help but create some sort of friction "fuck doll" his head lulled back, his body hitting the mattress moments after, my hand lay against his abs keeping me up while I pushed harder onto his tent

"Colby?" I asked seeing him look to him again "I really need you" my voice was shaky, needy. My finger traced a path from his v-line to his boxer strap, toying with the underneath begging for entrance

"fuck- need to be in you" he spoke, as he sat on his elbows, I grinned taking that as a yes to pull off the restraint from his cock "ughh" he quivered as it sprung to his stomach

"fuck me" I breathed, it seemed to light a fire in the boy, I felt our position switch, Colby towered above me, his arms reached above my head

"let me take care of you Y/n" he asked, peppering my face with small kisses, I nodded feeling his fingers go to my hips pulling my panties from my skin, the cold air hitting my burning core.

his fingers sweep my entrance "unnngh" I sighed eyes clamping closed, I reopened my eyes to watch the boy stick his slick fingers into his mouth, sucking off the reminiscences of me off

"you're so sweet baby girl-just like those fucking sweets" Colby looked to me, and without any words shared my mouth opened, and his two digits entered my mouth "mm"

It was enough teasing, we knew we couldn't keep teasing each other, it was torturous, his hand grabbed his cock slipping it gently between my folds "Col-Colby please" before I could even finish my pleas his tip pushed in me "aghhh" I called, my finger tips dug into the sheets, slowly he pushed deeper, incoherent noises fell from my lips, he stopped, our bodies meeting as he bottomed out

"shi-shi-shit Y/n... fuck" slowly the brunette pulled back achingly slow, feeling every inch of my inside before plowing back in, moans, groans, yelps of pleasure started to seep from us as he found a fast pace, the sound of sex filling the room, Colbys hands gently groping the skin

"Colby- Colby" I chanted, I grabbed one of his hands leading it to my neck, delicately his hand held me, not restricting my breathing but enough to make me want more of him, I traced sharp lines against his skin until my grasp fixed to his hair, every time his tip brushed my core my body shivered and pulled a tuft of his brown locks

"thats it Y/n- Take it take it take it!" Colby growled, his cock disappearing into my body "shit-" he swallowed

"Deeper Col- Fuck- Dee-deeper" I cried as I curled my hands around his head. Colby's eyes snapped to mine, those god damn blue eyes- the ones I stared at for years but never got to see them like this before, half shut but open enough to see his pupils growing larger with every hit

"say my name-" he moaned, I took one last gasp of air before the name 'Colby' flowed from my mouth sending rhythmic shivers down his back "ugh- Y/n I need you to keep doing that for me" for the first time since we began the pace slowed, his cock barely coming out of me "Fuck Y/n/n I'm so close" he whimpered sending a chill through my burning body "are you?" I nodded, no words escaping my mouth, our eyes locked, his eyes seeming to be darker and more lust filled than before, his hands moved from being around my neck to caging around my face "I cant hold it any longer babe" he moaned, his hips stuttered each time hitting my g-spot

"Co-Colby I'm going to- fuck- I'm gonna cum" I purred, hands scratching into his skin making him hiss in pleasure, soon we both groaned, his head falling into the crook of my neck

"ffffuuucckk" he cried as he pumped his load into me, I rolled my hips against him gently, riding out my high before I felt myself come down to the soothing feeling of lips against my face

"fuck you were so good sweetheart" Colby breathed, looking at my face checking I was okay

"I... I cant even speak" I smiled, hands holding onto his face, tracing his features

"fucked you that good?" he smirked jokily, slowly he pulled out, his hand rubbing over my stomach

"shut up" I grinned. The two of us lay there quietly for a moment, his arms coming around keeping me embraced to his side.

"you wont believe how long I've waned to do this with you" he soothed, pressing a kiss to the corner of my lip

"I always thought it was just me" I spoke

"wanna go grab a drink?" I nodded standing going to grab my panties off the floor "need a shirt?"

"yeah I think someone through mine onto the floor"

"Oh who was that?" I shook my head taking the t-shirt the boy handed me, I slipped it over my body taking in the cent of him, I went to take a step by my body felt shaky "you okay?" he laughed, hands gripping my arms

"mhm- just need a second" I giggled standing myself back up, soon we made it down stairs walking to go in the kitchen, my view was full with a blonde giving the most evil look, but not evil in a bad way, the way were straight away I knew the both of us were in for it

"so?" he spoke cocking his eyebrow up

"when did you get back?" Colby asked, pulling the fridge open and getting two bottles of something out

"about 10 minuets" I sighed, closing my eyes trying to ignore the blush from burning a hole in my face

"I called it years ago" Sam grinned coming from his place and hitting the back of the other boy before walking away

"aha don't go all shy Y/n- it's fine" the hands of Colby wrapped around my waist pulling me into a hug "you know he's only playing- but he isn't wrong, he called that we'd be together one day"

"Together?" I asked looking up to meet the eyes of the boy

"well- that was my next question" he sighed, lips pressing against mine "what do you think?"

"mh- I think its a good idea" my arms wound around his neck, pulling him to kiss my lips again "what do you think?"

"I think calling you mine sounds perfect"

[gloomura1]

Do you perhaps do crossovers (like for example obey me x twst or sumn similar to that)?

If so, could you perhaps do the demon brothers or Diavolo with a Malleus!Male! Reader? Doesn't exactly have to look like Malleus (mainly just the horns and magic abilities, personality too if you wanna add that).

Maybe some fluff headcanons of Diavolo or the demon brothers just simply being around Malleus!reader and spending time with him, and Malleus!reader being somewhat shocked that they aren't really afraid of him?

I'm hope you have a wonderful day!

(Edit: After so long Ive realized that I never really went through with the ask and went with my own story. Im so sorry dude, i will fix my mistake and remake it in a bit)

TW: VERY small mentions of the event Glorious Masquerade in Levi’s Part, Mentions of hurting Belphegor during lesson 16 + small spoilers, let me know if more!

Malleus!Reader and the Brothers

Lucifer🦚

When you first came to the Devildom, his first concern him was your abilities, and of course, your appearance. Nothing could’ve really prepared him to see a tall man with large horns, especially one with the amount of power to actually harm them. Slightly though, I mean you couldn’t be compared to THEE Lucifer (is what he continued to tell himself for a long time).

Throughout the year Lucifer mostly left you alone. He had small concerns, but it was most likely just paperwork and his brothers stressing him out so he stayed in his room. You were kinda used to that kind of treatment though so you didn’t mention it much.

He eventually warmed up to you, and you did try to keep out of trouble so nothing much happened. His trust also kind of broke a bit when he saw you using magic on his younger brother, Belphegor during the whole… trying to kill you thing. He understood it was for defense purposes though.

When he learns that people tend to avoid you and are usually scared of you, he felt a bit bad. He likes spending time with you now, and isn’t that scared of you. Maybe a bit intimidated with your height but it isn’t a huge problem since the horns make up around 4-5 inches. He adores your love and interest for gargoyles, and is extremely impressed when he finds out what your power level. Nothing could really compare to the brothers though, not even Belphegor.

Mammon💸

He thought you were badass honestly. Maybe a bit intimidated since you were pretty tall compared to him (and also the fact that you just looked terrifying). You did kinda remind him of Lucifer though…

During the year though, you end up dealing with him like usual. Mammon would take all sorts of things from you and try to steal it, but it slowly stopped after a while (years). One night though, he decides to take your beloved Drago. I swear he’s never seen you so upset over some toy! Are you like Levi, all into those weird games? Didn’t seem like the type.

After explaining that it was given by someone special, he stops most of his teasing. You’d hear a whine or two about how you would just give away expensive items to fix it, but a small smile after it’s fixed immediately shuts him up.

Levi🐍

He was bored out of his mind when he was suddenly out of his little fantasy and he just sees this super scary guys that’s like, the exact replica of Lucifer! The horns, the glare, the terrifying but badass look that just screams “normie”! He couldn’t believe it, you were also an exact replica of the Lord of Corruption!

He pretty much avoided you but admired you after that meeting. He could compare you to so many anime characters! You really got his attention, he’d stare at you in class all day! And during breakfast, lunch, and dinner... He does get closer with you by the end of the year, you were eager to learn what he knew about TSL. Though, he called you “normie” a lot during his rant. Well, at least you were able to mention gargoyles. And he was completely fine with it! Unlike Azul and Idia who completely made a whole deal out of it during your trip to Noble Bell College… Though, you did think of Idia while Levi was ranting about TSL. Maybe they both would be friends?

(might get into writing again but oh well. This is probably just a spurt of energy after months of being done with everything.)

[toxic3mmy]

haiiii :3 can you perhaps do alex comforting you after you find out you guys are pregnant? >~<

ummm yes!!!!!! is that even a question!!!!

prompt: you find out you and alex are pregnant together

no warnings! fluff!!!!

you found yourself pacing back and forth in your restroom. you were practically biting your nails completely off as you waited. finally your phone timer vibrated. you sat on the toilet lid and took a deep breath.

the pregnancy test was laid in your hand. you slowly flipped it over and saw those two little lines. you didn’t know what to do.

of course you were ecstatic! ever since you got with alexis, you decided that you wanted a family with him. it was just… very unexpected and a lot earlier than you planned. you hadn’t even brought up family making talk with alex.

oh god, alex…

as if on cue, a light knock on the restroom door brought you back down to earth.

“baby? are you okay? you’ve been in there for quite some time…” he jingled the doorknob to let him in

you quickly looked everywhere for a hiding spot for the pregnancy test and the box it came. you shoved it under the sink and pulled yourself together.

you slowly unlock the door and put on a fake smile for your boyfriend.

“hi”

“what’s wrong? were you throwing up again or?” he asked, worry written all over his face

“no i was um pooping… i had a coffee earlier and it did not settle well in my stomach” you laughed, trying to seem normal. you needed time to prepare for the talk with alex. you had absolutely no clue of how he’d react to the news.

“i told you too much caffeine is bad for ya… well, sorry for interrupting you. i thought something was wrong. i’ll leave you to it then” he laughed lightly

and just like a god damn miracle, the box flopped out from under the sink. you should’ve cleaned that cabinet out a long time ago. it was so full that the damn pregnancy test just decided to show itself. your eyes teared up as alex walked forward and pulled out the test from inside the box.

“y/n… is this? is this real? please tell me it’s a prank..”

anger filled within you. he wanted this to be a joke?!

“i knew you would react like this! i don’t need you! i don’t need anyone! i can raise my baby alone!” tears were now streaming down your face as you spoke

alex had a sad look on his face. he stepped forward and grabbed your face in his warm hands. you sniffled and looked at him.

“baby girl… i never said i didnt want the baby. yeah, it’s a little bit early but i would never hesitate to raise a baby with you. i want to be the baby’s father.” he gently dried your face of tears

“you mean that?”

“of course i do y/n. you had me worried.. i thought you would force me to leave you or assume i wanted you to have an abortion. i want you and.. i want the baby” he smiled softly, relief evident on his face

“i guess i do assume the worst in situations like this. this is 100% your fault by the way! you can’t keep your hands off me!” you laugh, teasing your boyfriend a bit

“i guess you’re right on that one. but isn’t it your fault for being so sexy in the first place?” he smirked

“oh shut up!”

“but in all seriousness, how far along are you?” he asked, taking your hand in his

“i think three weeks? i haven’t had my period in three weeks and ive been pretty nauseous daily ever since”

“that makes sense. im really sorry for not being responsible and wearing condoms. but are you sure you want to keep it? i’m not saying i don’t want you to but i just wanna make sure you think about it, i mean a baby is a big decision” he rubbed your hand soothingly

“im really sure alex.. are you sure you still want me? i’m never going to have this body again and.. i’m scared of you losing interest in me after i have the baby” you said, feeling insecure about how much you’re going to change throughout this pregnancy

“is that what you’re worried about, mi vida? that’s got to be one of the silliest things i’ve ever heard. you being pregnant won’t stop me from loving you.. nor will it change my attraction for you, if anything, i find it really attractive..” he said, touching your smooth face gently

“you do?”

“i do. you’ll be carrying our baby. our baby.. the product of our love. you’ll have a growing being inside of you that’ll have both our features. and seeing a baby grow inside of you that’s mine and yours… that’s goddamn attractive if you ask me” he chuckled lightly

“oh alex” you let out a sob, practically jumping into his arms as he held you close to his chest

“don’t worry baby girl, we’re gonna be fine. i’ll do everything in my power to make sure you and our baby are okay and safe, okay?” he said with a kiss to your temple

“yeah… i’ll have the best man in the world helping me raise our baby..” you snuggled into him more

“you make it sound like i’ll be an amazing father. i mean i can see myself being the best father possible but i can’t say i’ll be perfect. i’ll definitely do my very best to be a good father because our baby deserves it” he explained, caressing your hair

“woah… daddy alex? that’s pretty hot, im not gonna lie. i kinda see where you’re coming from that me being pregnant is attractive to you” you pulled back a bit to look at him as you spoke. you saw him visibly freeze

“did you just… did you just call me daddy??” he blinked a few times, processing what you just said

“you’re already an amazing daddy to me, always taking care of me. i’m good practice, no?” you practically purred, loving the blush that crept out onto his cheeks

“th-that’s, th-that’s not what i meant!” he stuttered, very flustered,

“i mean yeah i take care of you and look after you to the best of my abilities… but d-daddy?” he continued

“i know what you meant alexis, i think i just have a lot of hormones in my body right now. i think… i think these baby hormones are making me feel stuff already. i mean, the thought of you being a father is really sexy… im definitely turned on, not gonna lie” you confessed, not even feeling embarrassed

“so daddy alex then, huh?” he smiled, the blush still bright on his face

“mhm…”

“i dont know what got into you but, hey im not complaining” he chuckles and wraps his arms around you

“you’re such a dream..” you sigh

“y tu eres la mujer de mis sueños, eres la cosita mas hermosa y perfecta que me ha pasado” he said lovingly to you

“god, im going to love you forever”

“i love you so much too, forever. this baby will definitely make that love even stronger”

“i agree, mi amor”

“by any chance, have you thought of any baby names? i know you said you thought about us having a family and stuff..” he asked randomly

“i have actually, have you?”

“it’s kinda weird but i have. for a boy, i think carlos or joan and for a girl maybe paz or xochil” he said thoughtfully and you gushed at the fact that he even thought of baby names

“those are actually really pretty. i was thinking for a boy, ezekiel or alexis jr and for a girl something like hyacinth or eliana” you said

“are… are you serious” alex asked, looking down at the floor

“yes, i mean its perfect. i’ve always adored your name and he could be our little junior” you shrugged as if it wasn’t the biggest compliment to alexis

“our little junior… that’s just… wow, i have no words” he smiled

“maybe if it’s a girl, she can have my name or something similar?” you said after a minute

“it’s settled then. if it’s a boy, alexis junior and if it’s a girl, she’ll have your beautiful name” he smiled, leaning in to give you a quick kiss

“then it’s decided” you agreed

“can you promise me something? well, two things” he asked

“sure baby”

“can you please promise not to stress yourself about this pregnancy? i don’t want anything bad happening to you or our baby..”

“yes alex, i promise”

“and also… please don’t stop loving me after the baby is born. i know it’s common for women to have postpartum depression and things like that or even resentment towards the father for getting them pregnant… but i promise to do everything in my power to ensure a good life for you and our baby. i’m going to do everything for us, y/n. just, please don’t stop loving me…” his gaze shifts to the ground once again

“ay mi corazóncito… i could never ever stop loving you. you’re the only person i want to raise a family with… you’re my family” you say genuinely

“oh my god… thank you amor. thank you for everything. i’ll take care of you, okay?”

“okay alex” you nodded and after a while,

“maybe… maybe we should celebrate” you say suggestively

“oh… you mean..” he said innocently

“yeah..”

“yes… we definitely should celebrate” he nodded

“well then get to it daddy, mommy needs tending to”

alex lifts you from the toilet seat cover and takes your hand in his. he leads you to your bedroom and he made love to you. he was absolutely gentle and just overall a gentleman, tending to your needs.

he was going to be an amazing father, that was for sure.

[lullabyalikpoptarot]

IVE Personality Reading

Okay, I am ready to get back to some request for them. Just needed a break from them for a bit, but now let's look into what strong personality traits are showing up for them right now.

Yujin (Monk/Nun/The Sun) She may be someone who is more on the spiritual side. She may utilize her time alone, so she can gather her energy. She seems like a sweet loving person, a ball of sunshine. She enjoys bringing happiness and joy to others. She could be the type that isn't into lots of money or materialism. She is more into doing things for her own personal development and growth. She finds ways to shine on her own and be positive. She may also do meditative practices that bring her peace and joy.

Gauel (Mediator/The Lovers) This is nice energy. She seems to be the type that brings people together. To help others come to an agreement or solution. She is the type to see both sides of the situation and help others come to a conclusion or agreement. She is respectful and kind to both sides, would not judge one side over the other. She may be in a situation now where she is mediating others at the moment. She can also be good at making decisions, weighing the options and making the right choice for herself. She doesn't seem to rush into things too quickly.

Rei (Slave/2 of Wands) Why does this make me feel she is obligated to work with someone right now with these two cards. I can see her being a pretty passive person who may prefer others to pull the strings for her. She is able to endure a lot, but I do feel she can be easily controlled by others. I feel she gets influenced a lot by others. I see her wanting to learn from others a lot and see what they know and learn from them. She wants to learn the perspective of others. There is a lot about the world she wants to know and learn, she may also want to travel more as well. I see her being a very curious individual.

Wonyoung (Child Eternal/Knight of Cups) Why do I see her not taking any romantic offers from others with this Knight of Cups rv, at first, I thought this was her energy and it could be, but I also got that vibe. She has a strong inner child. This desire to stay young. She can be very nostalgic and playful. She has an optimism and hopeful energy to her. A need to stay young with mind, body and spirit. She has a strong vivid imagination. I kind of get she doesn't want to be tamed by anyone, this could be potential romantic partners. She kind of just wants to be free to do her own thing. It is like she shuts herself off emotionally from them. This will be interesting to get into her ideal type reading.

Liz (Rescuer/8 of Cups) She might be the type that feels she needs to help and rescue others. She is a very supportive person who helps those in need when need be. I can see her doing humanitarian things or volunteering places if she could. It looks like she seeks personal and spiritual growth as well. She may like time alone and distance to reflect on her life and her decisions. She might also be the type that gets down at times and needs time alone. It is like she shuts off and distances herself. I think she likes supporting others, but for herself she rather deal with it on her own without the help of others.

Leeseo (Angel/Ace of Swords) Sweet energy. She seems very kind and loving. A peaceful aura, someone who helps those around her and protects them as much as she can. It is like she tries to lift up the spirits of others around her. Overall sweet person. She seems to have lots of ideas, she is a curious person, tends to approach things in an intellectual sense. It might be hard for her to follow through on her plans, she may have an idea, but she doesn't really go any further with that. She may be the type to start up a new idea and then others kind of do the rest. I can also see her being a curious person and a bit naive as well.

This was pretty easy to get through. Their energies seem pretty nice here.

[mbat]

i literally read the book of bill days ago but its only now kinda hitting me how fucked ford and bills whole thing was though cause ford literally talks about being so unable to sleep (to try to keep bill away), and when sleep inevitably caught up to him, he would wake up to his body abused and things messed with and he just couldnt seem to find an escape (and he literally didnt get to truly escape until 30 years later)

(also keeping people awake for unhealthily long periods of time is another tactic used to mess with and control people because of how it impairs brain function)

listing off the things we see in those few pages in the book of bill:

i mean, punching and scratching at a steel door for hours would be so damaging to your hands and probably hurt like hell for at least 2 days after. then bill says he was hitting fords head against a wall, though its said in a post-it as if its a joke, but he also isnt exactly above doing that, and honestly he says most things like its a joke.

i also dont need to say 'bill really doesnt know how to take no for an answer' because he makes that very clear in literally any interaction we see with him.

bill literally puts a venomous snake near ford while fords asleep, which could have killed him if he wasnt lucky+skilled enough to deal with it.

he nearly gives ford hypothermia, and in the same action actively threatens ford with the idea of making him jump off of a high spot, and like ford says, doesnt do it just so he can send a message to ford about how hes the one in control.

he gets ford in trouble with not only the law, but also with other people that are probably not very happy with him after. he mutilates fords body in several ways, and i dont think i need to go into detail on them because theyre... so ew. and he even exposes part of fords body to the world. like, its just taking his shirt off, but thats still showing off his body in a way that he didnt agree to or want

and then he attempts to (or purposefully fails to) call stan, using fords voice to threaten suicide and tell stan that ford never loved him.

and he punctuates it with a final power move, in a hallucination that he creates, hes messing with stans memories and making him feel like his body was basically about to implode

and like. okay, we all joke about toxic old man yaoi, and its a good joke and toxic old man yaoi is great and its an interesting ship, but holy fuck.

like. to say the absolute least, that had to be so, so deeply violating. its no wonder that when we see ford in the past, when he finally contacts stan, he looks like hes on the verge of shattering into a million pieces. he just went through, and still wasnt yet out of, some deeply abusive shit.

like... everything coming out lately both in this book and what ive heard is on the website, mixed with what we already knew from the show itself... the stans are both so, so fucking tragic dude. their whole lives were thrown away over things that really didnt even need to be the way they were, and then they both get into situations that are pretty damn screwed, and those situations follow them for the rest of their lives. its basically a miracle that things worked out in the end for them.

i dont really have a point, i just had to talk about all that. i read almost all of the book of bill in one sitting, and while i was really enjoying it, i was also getting kind of tired of sitting in one spot only doing this one thing for several hours straight. i still felt a lot of the emotional bits of it of course, but man this part specifically just really didnt hit me until now.

i mean, to say the absolute least, i know what its like to feel violated in a similar way, though not anywhere near to the extent of what he went through at all. someone get that man some therapy got damn

[pixelnrd]

hello! ive binged your blog this past week and have been so invested and impressed with how professionally everything has been done. I particularly liked the snippets of your 'process' you've hinted at in other asks. I havent been around since the beginning so i wanted to ask what inspired you to undertake such a large project! or, rather, did you expect it to be as big as it became? each generation has 70+ daily posts, their portrait headshots, family portraits... i love it! were you trying to build an audience when you started out? was it a covid project that you had time to build a huge queue for? i think ill be starting my own narrative simblr here soon and i'd love to hear your thoughts or advice about your journey with it, if any.

Hello and thank you for such a lovely message, it's so nice to receive feedback on the quality of my Decades Challenge because I do put so much effort in behind the scenes thanks to my agonising perfectionism!

As a project it has grown beyond what I thought it would be, to a point that I had to reign it back in in early-2022 because I couldn't keep up. I'll put more detail under the cut ✨

The Langstons started as a covid project in 2020. I was an unemployed student with a lot of time on my hands. I'd done legacies before and was pretty good at getting close to the end so that was the 'project', to do the Decades Challenge. And while looking for inspiration like cc and builds etc I found simblr and discovered people were posting their Decades Challenges here with narrative attached. By this stage I'd already played a fair bit into my Langston family (they had 4 kids by that point) so I decided to start posting my sims as well, which pushed me to put a bit more effort in with shots, story, editing etc because I had imposter syndrome. I didn't intend for there to be much narrative or story, and I think that's pretty obvious when reviewing the 1890s Langstons, but it started to grow as I was posting because I wanted to give my sim characters justifications for their life paths I was sending them on... and it all kind of took off from there, as a Decades Challenge story.

Covid over 2020 and 2021 in my country forced us into hard lockdowns, and over those 2 years I had heaps of spare time for home-based hobbies - so I just kept pushing myself to keep going with my Decades Challenge for something to do. I got really into creating storylines and costuming and wanting to do the project 'justice' because of how much effort was going in and how many generations I needed to cover to finish it. Then I stared doing lookbooks, creating portraits and character pages, and then making cc (which was a fun side project).

I wanted to build an audience at the start because I wanted to gauge whether anyone was as interested in my sims as I was in others', and when I stared getting feedback and responses to my posts it was very validating and flattering, so that spurred me to keep up. I never dreamed it would get the audience it has now! It's nice being told that something you are making is good. IRL at the time, I was pretty miserable - I graduated my Masters without a job, I was trying to conceive and failing, I was lonely due to covid and lost some of the best years of my 20s - but simblr made me happy and was a distraction from those hard things and so I really poured effort into the thing that brought me happiness.

2022 and 2023 forced me to pull back from my Decades Challenge project due to pregnancy and becomming a parent. It felt very natural to drop it at the time, but since finding my groove with parenting and my new life I still want to finish this project because it's been nearly 4(!) years of effort and I'd hate to leave it so close to the end. So that's why I'm still here - in a reduced capacity to what I was in 2020 and 2021 at my peak - trying to get it done. I don't post lookbooks or do cc anymore, because I just don't have the time anymore. But everyone is so encouraging, I have made some nice friends here and I'm constantly in awe of and inspired by the sims, content and stories others are creating. There is so much more potential for historical gameplay in the years since I started my Decades Challenge - farming! horses! infants! - and I hope that my project has inspired others to have a go! That's the best legacy I could hope to leave...

[hazshit-hotel-hater]

I'm not a "ship" person whatsoever but I do scroll character tags on occasion and see quite a bit of Vox and Vel together as well as what seems to be a lot of what I'm assuming is female original character stuff. I've even seen some Charlie and Vox too. So it's out there, but unless you're scrolling through character tags I can see how it might be hard to find. Personally, I also block/filter a lot of the big "ship" tags so maybe that also makes it easier for me to stumble across this stuff that "slips" through since I don't know if those pairings have names.

I get your point though. I do think many are inclined to erase his bisexuality when it's convenient. Interestingly, they also erase Valentino's pansexuality too. The same with Husk as well, but I check his tag a lot less so who knows.

What disappoints me, and I know I'm about to come off as nit-picky right now lol, is the lack of research people put into their "sexuality" headcanons for the characters with reference to their different eras. When reading some of them, you'd think the idea of "gay rights" was a completely new and foreign topic that only emerged after the early 2000s. I get people want to go for the simplistic "repressed and doesn't know what being [insert identity here] is" for some of the older characters but that completely ignores a fascinating and rich tapestry of queer history that could create far more interesting (and still accurate) stories for the characters/their backgrounds. I would really encourage those who haven't already or are generally unfamiliar to dive into this history as it might inspire their character ideas while also educate them on the work, art, and activism our queer elders have contributed to the community we have today.

I think this may partially relate to character ages being under explored as well. While I've seen debate on what is canon/has been decanonized many of these characters, as far as we know, died in their late 30s and beyond. That's a lot of life to live and experience. While certainly many people throughout history (and even today) kept their sexuality hidden from the public due to culture, shame, and safety that doesn't mean there weren't many incredible private venues/spaces that could be utilized to explore those feelings/identities in secret.

I could go on and on about this but I've totally strayed from your original point (I'm sorry!) and I'm very tired haha. I just think there are multiple factors coming into play here with these character interpretations and, for me, the biggest missed opportunity is the lack of historical research. But end of the day people should have their fun! Just an observation.

Completely agree with this! I doubt my response will be as long since I just woke up but other characters doing certain things or not knowing about sexualities is interesting, it just seems like a lot of people think older people don’t want to explore any of that like it only just happened recently as you said. I like to joke about Angel being shocked about gay marriage and not knowing a bunch of current terms but thats about it. With him being in the mafia when he was alive makes it much more interesting as well, I’m pretty sure around his time the mafia was blackmailing men in gay bars but dont quote me on that I might be wrong.

Anyway for Husk and Valentino pan erasure I see that a bunch too. Not exactly erasure but just… ignoring it? Moreso erasure on Valentino’s end because Ive seen people get mad at people for shipping Valentino with a woman and was like “hes gay dont do that” no he isnt. Also dont ship Valentino with anyone for the love of god. But like people are super used to just making up headcanons that they dont bother to look up actual canon stuff. I know Hazbin isn’t the best but if you want canonically LGBTQ+ characters use what you have and add on later. Or headcanon a background character, thats what I did with Molly.

People are very focused on modern day queerness and forget that this stuffs been happening for decades and it’s a bit sad. Also I seem to have strayed from my own question as well?? Anyway ty for mentioning this! Its very interesting 🩷

[forlorn-crows]

Crow!

I have a question...questions? Request? Maybe a little bit of both...?

I am a (relative) newcomer to the fandom, I've been hyper-focused on Ghost for the last year and my heart's completely, irreparably and quite blissfully gone on all of the Era IV Ghouls (Phantom and Aurora included), but, in particular, on our beloved Earth Ghoul Mountain (Mmmmmountain...💕)

HOWEVER, recently, I've begun trying to learn more about the previous era's Ghouls, and although I already have a growing appreciation for Omega, there's another that I find myself circling back to again and again and again...

...Zephyr.

Unfortunately, there seems to be a distressingly small amount of information on him in terms of HC's and fandom lore which really does make it harder to get a feel for his character and personality, so, I was wondering if you could help with that.

How do you see him in your head?

What is he like?

Who is he to you?

Please help me add a tenth Ghoul to the nine I already love...

hi, welcome!

ive got lots of headcanons about them so i'd love to go through some of those for you. i'll drop some great zephyr photos first and then we'll continue under the cut :3

firstly, i cant tell you where the name zephyr originated. maybe fanfiction or other fan circles. zephyr is more commonly known as "chAir", because they were almost always sitting down to play. sort of like cowbell is named after the instrument he appeared for two seconds to play lmao

you'll notice i use they/them pronouns for zeph. thats something i picked up from @gayrickgrimes when i first started interacting more with ghost fanfic. but lots of people also use he/him. not sure why nonbinary zeph has really stuck with me since then, but i quite enjoy it!

i would say the most commonly shared headcanons about zephyr are as follows:

older in age, like omega or alpha often are portrayed

has chronic back and/or joint pain (there's lots of clips of them walking off stage holding their back, thus the headcanon)

has light or white hair, commonly portrayed as longish and wavy.

reserved. maybe a little "old mannish" at times. less spontaneous than other ghouls.

however! they like groovin' on stage. can be seen doing some wiggles during their keytar solo or jamming out on their stool.

some artistic portrayals i love are @endopyre's, @turbodrawn's, and @kamonart's :3 also for a portrayal that doesnt necessarily fit those 'common' appearance hc's above is @joeynihil's zeph, whom i LOVEEE.

i also love @divine-misfortune's depictions of them, but i have indeed given void the zephyr brainrot soooo....oopsies sorry not sorry.

so, now onto the things i specifically headcanon about zephyr. i dont know if youve read any of my ficlets with them yet, but i do have a few! generally, i hc pretty similar to the above bullet points. some other thoughts i have are as follows:

i think zeph has a more antiquated way of speaking. doesnt use a lot of slang or 'modern' words. is very precise, refined in the way that they speak.

very amicable with and well-loved by their pack (aether, ifrit, dew, mountain).

has an 'air' about them, if you will (pardon the pun haha). some may say its too much like they're looking down their nose at you, but i think they're clever, smooth, and teasing in equal measure. has a way with words, in more ways than one.

they really do like to have fun on stage, and i think they like to 'let loose' a little bit that way. that ghoul can groove and move when they want to! and i do enjoy watching ritual footage of them, would recommend <3

not sure if you're interested in unglamoured hc's, but i think they turn very gangly, resembling something like a vulture or other long-legged birds. taloned feet and hands. hocked legs. feathers sticking out behind their ears and tattered, crooked wings. bright eyes that glow in the dark and can see for miles. razor sharp teeth. literally terrifying if you catch them peering at you from high in the trees.

likes when the others offer to help with their back pains. ifrit with his warm hands. aether with his quintessence. maybe mountain with weed or dew taking them to the lake to take some weight of their joints. always very kind, thankful in return.

i think the abbey has a chapel with an organ that zeph likes to play. i think that's what they learned on originally, and transferred that knowledge to the keyboard. when they retired from the band they still enjoyed playing for midnight mass or special occasions.

lastly, i think zeph is a quiet dom. very controlled of a ghoul in normal situations, but very good at controlling and directing others. has a silver tongue and can absolutely take mountain down to studs with just words. i have many feelings about mountzeph in general, and how their dynamic works, which ive explored a little bit. but in general, i think zeph likes to have that control, either because they have pain that doesnt allow them the freedom to explore certain pleasures, and/or because thats what they like. its natural and fun for them. and its certainly fun for everyone else involved lmao. i just think of them as a very elegant ghoul in all aspects of their life.

all in all, im very fond of zephyr as a character, at least how i see them in my head and how i've seen them portrayed by others thus far! hopefully that can serve as some inspiration for you in 'getting to know' this air ghoul :3

[cleromancy]

i was talking about this with @laufire and i think something key for how i think about dick and jason's relationship--in my new earth future sandbox that mostly exists in my imagination, but honestly this tracks with what ive read of them in prime earth--is that they choose to become brothers as adults. i just don't think they managed to get there before jason died. i think they would have, i think they were on that track, i just don't think they had time. dick is a little prickly okay, it takes him time to properly warm up to people. he liked jason by the time he died, but i don't think they were family yet.

and i think one thing that happens is like. by the time they would be in a place to do this, to make a choice to be brothers and build that relationship, dick's actually really proud of being a big brother, this is something he finds very meaningful and important and fulfilling. so emotionally what he wants is to be the big brother. but crucially i don't actually think that's the way their dynamic will shake out

jason is pretty resistant to being taken care of, for one thing, and for another he simply does not need the kind of protecting that dick can actually do. and jason is obviously a very complicated and unstable person in general, so that's a complication too. and dick is... he's not... its actually pretty hard for him to take care of people, okay, and he's just not able to be consistent for the way he actually shows up for people. he wants to be, he wants to be so badly, but he's not really a person you can call consistently and expect him to pick up the phone. and i love that about him honestly, he's a mess, he's doing his best but he's a mess.

and that's okay:

Maybe he wishes Dick had gone through with it, if not Bruce, but so what. Jason doesn't lose any sleep over ending the clown for good, and here Dick is, still messed up having ended him for two minutes. So what if Jason had always wanted a protector? Those childhood daydreams of a father or a big brother who would go to bat for him—so to speak—what does that matter? What does that matter, when it comes down to it, when he can protect himself?

but i do think that dick is sort of. aspirationally big brother. jason doesn't want to think of dick as a big brother because that comes with some expectations he doesn't expect dick to actually meet--they can be brothers and equals and he can look up to him but without wanting things from him dick can't give.

and i think that creates an interesting dynamic and an interesting bit of tension between them where they both have certain ideas for this relationship and what they want it to be, what they want from each other and what they're able to actually reliably give each other.

[ghost-of-a-system]

HI IM A PRETTY NEWLY DISCOVERED SYSTEM, AND WE HAVE QUESTIONS ABOUT SOURCE MEMORIES

(sorry about the capslock, for some reason our keyboard glitches out sometimes lol) HOW DO THEY WORK?? LIKE, HOW DO I KNOW IF ITS A SOURCE MEMORY OR IF IM JUST MAKING IT UP? WE ALREADY HAVE PROBLEMS WITH RECOUNTING MEMORIES SO HOW DO WE DO IT FOR SOMETHING WE DONT EVEN HAVE ANY PHYSICAL PROOF OF?

(okay the keyboard is fixed now)

can it just be like... a feeling? sometimes i look at a character from my source and i go "oh i like them. i get a fond feeling when i look at them" even though ive never really been intruduced to that character before? can they develop after the alter is?

sorry if its a lot of questions, were just really confused and we cant find anything that answers our questions 😭

(Also we hope that you are all doing well!!)

no worries, and we'll try our best to answer. we struggle with similar things, the recounting memories part mainly. well, we struggle a lot with looking back on "the body's" memories (whether they're from yesterday or a decade ago) and trying to decipher whether they were real or not ('specially if there's 'no proof' to help us). so that happens with our pseudomemories/source memories as well.

there's two things that we really depend upon when it comes to remembering source memories, or determining if we even have them to begin with. those are usually emotions and, honestly gut feeling lol. what you described with looking at someone and simply feeling that way could very much help indicate something about your memories. for us it is usually kinda like this, just comes to us naturally really. it's what our brain jumps to first and it's what feels the most "right" when comparin it to how we feel about other possibilities.

as far as the whole emotions thing we mentioned, it's a little more specific to us, so it might not completely work for others (?). we generally have a pretty hard time forcing ourselves to feel a certain way, mainly towards people and events. emotions, connections, events, they're all things that take time or personal experience for us to feel much of anything for. when it comes to source memories, i mean we could try to make up a scenario from a source but chances are we won't feel anythin towards it. when we do remember something from our source/"past", and we feel something for it, usually strongly, well, we know it's genuine because we know how our brain works. if it wasn't real to us, we would be completely unfeeling about it.

now this gets a bit tricky since sometimes you can have source memories but feel little to nothing towards them anyway, and though it doesn't happen often for us (we usually either have them and feel heavily for/are affected by them, or have none at all), it has been the case a few times. usually we would rely on that gut feeling thing but, honestly? since we felt nothing for those memories, we never really had an interest in trying to learn more about them. so that's about the most i could add to that.

last thing promise haha, regarding the "can they develop after an alter already has" thing. we have a little experience with this personally, but my short answer is i'm sure it can. if it's what your brain needs, well, anything's plausible in a situation like this, in my opinion. personally it has only ever really happened to us after an alter has split but before they have completely "developed" past being a fragment of sorts. like we have an introject guy we split a while back, didn't know too much about em source-wise, did engage with the source a couple days or so after they showed up. then those bits ended up being part of their source memories later on. so yeah, i'm still sure it can.

hopefully that works, if not we can clarify anything! we hope you're doing well too :)

[weirdmageddon]

can someone explain what “weed paranoia” is?

ive never experienced it, all i experience is like….relaxation, monotropic autism flow state, calms me down enough to not get overstimulated by my own thoughts (i feel more at ease with my thoughts coming and going, i kinda go into free flow thought tunnels without getting hung up or ever spiraling. in fact, the opposite, where it’s like a “catch and release” sort of experience to train of thought most of the time. i mean i’ll still definitely hyperfocusing on something which you could consider getting “hung up” on but thats just normal autism stuff and i feel like i can mine for more deeper insight riches in those hyperfixation tunnels when high.

it also definitely helps me unmask. like my mask is sort of built into my core personality and “self” but i find it hard if not impossible to shut off even when im alone because ive internalized the external social sphere. but THC (i should note im taking Δ9) like…. takes the edge off, and i feel less conflicted about my thoughts? like i’m more confident in getting my thoughts out there without worrying about people judging me for how i phrase things or how hyperspecific im being to my own interests. i feel like i dont have to water things down as much because i dont feel as threatened by judgment externally, and in turn internally

i looked up my question about what “weed paranoia” feels like on reddit and the common answers ive seen were:

generalized anxiety

“everyone knows” / you feel like people are watching or judging you and that youre gonna be in trouble

“You’re very aware of your own actions and existence, and assume everyone else is also.”

heightened self-reflection (for some people this freaks them out??) because different perspective

more vulnerable

but i’m not satisfied with these answers??

i want to know if people who get paranoid have these traits while sober/before getting high. like, is it just non-introspective people getting freaked out because they’re considering their own actions/thoughts and existence? or do introspective people who are used to metacognition also getting freaked out?

are people afraid of confronting their weaknesses that weed makes them aware of? are people who normally hide from truths more likely to get paranoid?

ok so i can only fully know my own mind; that is my reality. i have a habit of assuming people more or less share the same phenomenological experiences in their minds, but since i’m autistic i’ve had to expand this boundary over and over continually reconciling with way more diverging phenomenological experiences than i thought.

so i normally i have thoughts about my own thoughts pretty much at least five times every hour, every single day of the week. i do not experience is not a bad thing, it’s a neutral and even good thing. i think i am insightful by nature and always have been, ive been described as such. i don’t know how normal this is for the average person. weed does enhance these metacognitive thoughts i have to an even higher level, and i feel very, very pulled towards them in a good, flow state way. ive also been told my guarded chilly heart melts a bit and i become more open/vulnerable while stoned but that’s because i don’t feel as vulnerable as i normally do. so i dont hide or clam up as much away from psychological openness or whatever exact shit enneagram type 5 is on

but anyway even without weed i normally feel “outside” of my own thoughts, always judging them from a third person perspective, or even multiple third person perspectives through reframing. so i dont feel like i have a defined or clearly illuminated sense of self. i’m not trying to really “find myself” so much as uncover it. like, it’s definitely there to begin with i can feel its presence, but the specifics are obscured and i’m trying to bring them to light. i automatically isolate logical components from emotional components into their own boxes and rarely acknowledge the emotional box because it’s unhelpful in more circumstances than not so it’s all a pretty clinical process when i make sense of things

because i can do this i’m never afraid of the truth; in fact i actively go in search of it and honestly it feels like THC helps me achieve that on MYSELF and it makes me very satisfied

i also don’t know if what i said is normal. am i comfortable with truths and facing them to an unusual degree over most people, or about the same as them?

i saw this comment and it’s like….. that makes sense with disinhibition of the frontal cortex. i think way too much about the rhetoric and kairos of how im communicating information to others normally, but with these consciously overthinking circuits driving and modifying my social thoughts and behaviors being turned down while stoned, i find i dont care as much. it’s like my conscious autism masking is peeled away, so i feel more content while stoned. and it also makes me more open as a result.

like i said, “i feel more at ease with my thoughts coming and going, i kinda go into free flow thought tunnels without getting hung up or ever spiraling” which is how this guy is describing “going with the flow”

the takeaway is i dont have a negative reaction to when i realize unpleasant things about myself while high. it’s just this neutral acknowledgement. this even goes for physical things that usually tip people off like their heart rate being “too fast” while high. i do perceive it also but theres like no anxiety with it, again just neutral observation and acknowledgement

basically im Actively looking for this

so some questions:

can someone explain what “weed paranoia” is like, taking into account the gist of what ive said? if you experience it do you have any insight into why it happens? does anything ive said have to do with it? do you already have neurotic tendencies (low resistance to stress)?

what does my experience while high + my normal thought processes as ive described them say or imply about me?

why am i experiencing pretty much the polar opposite of the way weed paranoid people are describing anxiety of being judged? or like the thing about my feelings of vulnerability?

am i more comfortable with truths and facing them to an unusual degree than most people, or am i actually about the same as them? am i more introspective/metacognitive than most people, or am i actually about the same as them?

if people who ARE already introspective get high and feel paranoid, why would that happen—wouldnt they be used to uncovering things about themselves? are there other reasons? does one’s sentiment to oneself play into it? neurotic traits?

oomf said “your high is always driven by how capable you are of passively defusing triggers for a bad trip”. the explanation for how well people tolerate THC ive gravitated towards outside of genetics (since my mom doesnt tolerate thc well but i do) is ability to deflect stressful thoughts, or how impacted you are by stressful thoughts in the first place. is this anything?

i hope im describing these things adequately so i can get the answers im looking for lol. please tell me if any of this means anything to you or if its just words

EDIT:

^ to me everything is great and feels significant, but is that because the things that feel significant are themselves good? if weed makes stuff seem more significant (too much dopamine weighs negative inputs too highly), that means it amplifies what’s already there (while also amplifying “noise”). so that tells us about the nature of what is already there in the mind’s contents, then?

so again, question 2: what does my experience while high + my normal thought processes as ive described them say or imply about me?

[vattenkokare]

This might sound rude but at first I found your art style strange, but the more I saw of it the more I slowly started to fall in love. Every line, every character, every ship, your art has made me see past what I thought of 'pretty' and look at it as it is, an art style. Being an artist myself, I often find myself unhappy if my art looks too unnatural and such. But I look at your art and find nothing but comfort and adoration for the way you draw them.

I'm sorry for rambling, just know that you've officially made a stubborn artist fall in love with a style who never would've interested her if not for you. Thank you for existing and blessing everyone with your art. It's really, truly the best thing.

PLZZ got pretty scared at the first sentence ngl- but don't worry i do know my art isn't that conventionally pretty and probably not for every viewer. additionally what i think makes it less 'pretty' is the fact that i try to mimic reality in a way that makes sense to me, so the places look lived in and things look used by the characters, not just set to look pleasing. i do really love adding those little details even if it comes out a bit chaotic in the end lol

ANYWAY i love longer messages and ive reread this one a couple of times cause it's so sweet and i'm SO happy someone out there found something for themselves in my art😭🫶 especially when it wasn't your cup of tea at first, i truly feel honored that i managed to change someones mind RAAAH i am overjoyed sitting here giggling n kicking my feet THANK YOU SM for this ask it really means so much to me💞

AND ALSO i wish you best and to be fully happy with your art cause i do get the pain of it, i've hated the way the things i make look for the longest time but overcoming your perfectionism towards art and accepting it is really the best thing ever AAH i'm sure your creations are really great it's just the artists way to see the little inperfections and get focused on them

i hope my answer isn't too chaotic cause i rlly tried to sort my thoughts here 🙏

[actualbird]

have you noticed that time’s antiques has a CRAZY amount of ceiling lights? and whenever luke is there every light is on? his electricity bill must be absolutely crazy. not to mention he has a literal DARTBOARD in his detective office. this has led me to realise that not only is his taste in clothing questionable but his interior design skills are also bizarre

omfg yes YES luke's interior design tastes are BIZARRE and hes a WEIRDO (affectionate)

i now feel possessed to screencap everything in his building that i am either baffled by or want to point out because i found it cool. buckle up, i (as always) have a lot to say

so let's go on a tour of luke's home

FIRST FLOOR: THE ONE FREE OF MOST SIN BY VIRTUE OF BEING AN ANTIQUE SHOP

a lot of my confusion here can be waived since it's an antique shop and those are meant to be crowded and kitschy and maximalist, thats their whole Thing and i love that. like, the lights, which uve already commented on, there are SO MANY but theyre charming to me here because it fits, this disparate chaos but still emanating warmth

tho that being said ive noted down some bits that do still pique my interest

EXHIBIT A: antique cash register. given its placement on the counter/main table, i assume it's used for actual business and not an item for sale. of course, it could just be for display, but im jarred because it's right next to the High Tech Touch Screen. do people in stellis even pay with cash anymore? they seem to be hugely digital even in currency. it'd be funny if this thing WERE used for actual business and it's filled with all of luke's loose change and coins that he has trouble getting rid of so he instead foists them off to unwitting customers

EXHIBIT B: my only real complaint for this portion because how can any customer get to those drawers, theyre BLOCKED BY OTHER STUFF

EXHIBIT C: alright antique TV but i cant tell if it's just showing a random VHS tape or if it's doubling as luke's CCTV camera display. cuz it kinda looks like CCTV display of a road. which, honestly, is pretty cool!! it's a fun marriage between old tech and new. this is something im less confused by and more just something i wanted to point out cuz it delighted me to think about

SECOND FLOOR: NOT NECESSARILY CONFUSING BUT GOD IT IS SO MESSY IN HERE LUKE LET ME IN HERE I NEED TO CLEAN THIS ROOM

EXHIBIT A: certificates!! this is cool, i wish we could see them clearer. i guess these could be luke's PI certification though maybe one of them could also be his master's degree? which would be odd to have displayed in a detective agency given his degree is in bioengineering but itd be funny to match vyn who has his Two Doctorates on display in his office HAHA

EXHIBIT B: luke, please tidy up

EXHIBIT C: door with 221 B on it which i think is super cute. hes such a nerd hes just got that blatant sherlock reference in his literal detective agency office, so everyone who walks in will know that he is not only a detective, but also a fanboy. im not sure if this door is what leads to his third floor home but itd be SO LOVELY if yes!!

EXHIBIT D: luke, please tidy up

EXHIBIT E: peanut's bird perch!!!! this is endearing to me because it looks like such a....such a Gym Flavored Bird Perch kjhJHVSDFH LIKE it's made of metal and chains and not at all like most bird perches u'd find that are usually a wooden or more natural design. this is a bird perch for birds that work out. maybe luke made this for peanut himself to get peanut to exercise. peanut is offended by this. peanut perches on it regardless

EXHIBIT F: luke, please tidy up and god if u keep missing throwing trash into the trash can just moVE THE TRASH CAN CLOSER TO UR DESK

EXHIBIT G: luke, please tidy up

EXHIBIT H: luke, please tidy up

EXHIBIT I: luke, please tidy up

EXHIBIT J: luke, please tidy up

EXHIBIT K: dartboard!!! which u mentioned. i like that it's here in the detective agency office floor because i get to imagine luke stumped on a case and then playing some darts to help himself refocus <3

THIRD FLOOR: LUKE PEARCE, I HAVE A LOT OF QUESTIONS

EXHIBIT A AND EXHIBIT B: okay my question here was gonna be "hoop lights?? tiny ladder????" but i answer it myself in a post wayyy wayyyyyy back where i talk abt how i think these interesting furnitures are there for Peanut Pearce Enrichment. it simply makes no sense if i dont assume this, but that aside, it's endlessly endearing to me to think that luke has fashioned a bunch of his living space to give joy to his emotional support birdson. imagine peanut hopping up that tiny ladder! or flying thru one hoop light and perching on another! avian paradise :D

EXHIBIT C: luke's palette bedframe....god this thing drives me nuts. it's not BAD but what gets me about is that it seems like such a stub-ur-toe hazard, a bruise-ur-lower-shin hazard, and a tripping-over-this-corner-that-sticks-out-and-is-on-the-path-of-foot-traffic-otw-to-the-kitchen hazard. the clumsy will be HARMED!!!!! LUKE, WHY WONT U GET A PROPER BEDFRAME!!! OR AT LEAST FIX THIS BEDFRAME TO BE THE EXACT SIZE OF UR BED SO IT ISNT THAT MUCH OF AN INJURY MAGNET JKAFVAJHFVA im on my knees....

EXHIBIT D: why on earth does he have a whole cupboard filled JUST with camera lenses. wait brb //asks a friend who is has a professional photographer dad............ok nvm hes off the hook for this one, apparently this is normal for photographers. im simply diagnosing luke with dedicated nerdery once again then. i love him dearly.

EXHIBIT E: HE WAS A GAMER BOI, SHE SAID SEE YA L8ER BOI!!!!! man peep all them games!!!! and his consoles next to them!!! i hope luke plays matches against other ppl and that hes Fucking Terrifying to other players. i know we've seen him game with mc and hes mostly adorable, but when hes gaming against non-mc individuals......i hope luke pearce is accidentally going Raven Mode against some random 13 year olds in apex legends or something. just because itd be so damn funny.

EXHIBIT WE'RE SAVING THIS FOR LAST: this is the most baffling to me among all the things in this whole building. it's a....trash can? but Not. it's a large trash can shaped container used for containing things, which, okay, that could work. but luke is using it to contain MAGAZINES????? AND ROLLED UP PAPERS?? im speechless. that is simply the most non-intuitive container to go for when thinking "hm, where should i put these objects made of paper, a material famously known for their flatness" aND HIS CHOICE OF CONTAINER IS A CYLINDER ?¿¿?¿??¿????LUKE!!!!!.

luke is a strange little guy. hes also the epitome of cluttercore. im obsessed with everything about him.

[biggie-chcese]

yuma cockhead

yuma cockhead.... his silhouette is pretty dick shaped in a way thanks to that haircut now that i think abt it

ANYWAY YUMA SHIPS!!! I LOVE A LOT OF THOSE (spoilers below)

NDA

Shinigami- 10/10 i love these two a lot and they're everything 2 me and i am very much enamored by the idea of a pair sharing mind and body. do yall think they had freaky mind se-

Yakou- 20/10 i have rambled before so ill refrain here but the angst potential mixed with the funny roommates potential is everything to me. i feel So Many things about them. they should have pathetic cringefail sex all the time <3

Halara- 9.8/10 i really love them deeply, especially how easily yuma breaks through halara's walls. the only reason points have been docked at all is because theyre not at the forefront of my mind

Desuhiko- 5/10 i only really like them in memes otherwise i kinda dont care

Fubuki- 8/10 theyre sooo cute together and i love how patient and sweet yuma is with her and how much she opens yuma's mind!!! also just not at the front of my mind but it is a banger ship. anyway can we start calling them kokoclock

Vivia- 20/10 OH BABY... fellas is it gay to be narrative foils? is it gay to change each others' outlook on life and truth and peace and happiness? also this fucking height difference makes me crazy

Kurumi- solid 2/10 i dont hate it but i dont like it either. the game makes me dislike it but ive seen some good fanon stuff. i think it's at its best if kurumi has a one-sided fangirl crush that's lowkey creepy but not outright yandere

Amaterasu

Makoto- 20/10 OUGHHH... i Really like this one. rattling them in my brain all the time. there's something i find deeply interesting in the way that they Truly understand each other. it's even easier to see ones own flaws and needs from an outsider's point of view, and i think that's a Really Good Thing for the world's most emotionally constipated minds

Yomi- 8/10 this one is extremely self indulgent to me because i think angry yuma is... really good. i want them to have nasty hatesex where they try to kill each other

Swank- 5/10 because erm uhhh. this has a very Specific appeal to me sorry. i want a lot of things to happen to yuma. swank should burn cigars on yuma's skin and then shotgun smoke with him in a seedy motel after yuma has made several bad choices in a row

Fake Zilch- 5/10 kind of similar reasoning to swank. not elaborating

the rest of the peacekeepers- idk man 2/10 or something i do not give a fuck about these ships but it's yuma so im open to them

Train Detectives

Real Zilch- 4/10 ive seen cute art but im mostly indifferent

Aphex- 5/10 i like that aphex is mean to yuma he should bully him More

Pucci- 3/10 the scene where their hands touched annoyed me i didnt want pucci to be a love interest. and then a more annoying love interest plot came afterwards so i guess that's how it goes. i dont care man idc

Zange- idk like 2/10. i dont care.

Melami- 4.5/10 i like that the first thing she did was grope yuma on sight. realest shit of all time. speak your truth, girl

Misc

Shachi- 4.5/10 i think it's a bit hot that shachi looks like he could snap yuma like a wafer stick. also i once drew them fucking once so now im attached

Nun- 4/10 i read one particularly good fic

The Literal Book of Death- 5/10 i read one particularly good fic

Ramen Shop Owner- 6/10 it would be really, really funny. besides yuma ramenhead deserves at least some good head from number one for literally solving kanai ward for him

aaand that's everything i feel like giving an opinion about! if you're curious about any others, assume i'm indifferent. thanks for asking!

[teabeexo]

Heyyy tea ･:*+.\(( °ω° ))/.:+

what do the wardrobes of your MCs look like? (Their styles, favorite clothing piece or outfit, that type of stuff!)

Hello Ice!!!!!! <3333

I’m SOOO glad you asked! Ive given quite a bit of thought to this topic for each of my sillies..

WINONA

Winona’s style is what I would describe as casual alternative and mostly grunge. She likes monotone colors, especially black or grey. That, paired with dark splashes of color. Her big thing is band shirts — big, oversized shirts that display her musical interests loud and clear. She wears that with baggy jeans that typically sit lower on her hips. She’s much taller than average, so most pairs of pants seem to do that regardless. Despite the heat of Sunset Bird, she very rarely wears shorts. If she does wear shorts, they’re usually uniquely patterned or especially comfortable. Her shoes are thick-soled and comfortable, her makeup usually consisting of sharp eyeliner, various sultry eyeshadows, a desaturated lip, and whatever else enforces her style.

INSPO PICTURES BELOW!

LUELLA

Luella’s style is a bit harder to fully label, even though I have a pretty good understanding of it. It’s a bit of a mix between alternative and boho, with select aspects of each. Her main thing is patterns. She really likes patterns and abstract designs. They don’t necessarily have to be vibrant, but she just enjoys lots of color for her to play around with and stylize. She wears both jeans and shorts, but usually goes for jeans. Tank tops (including cropped ones) and tees are most common for her. She likes sweaters too, but doesn’t typically wear them because of the climate. Usually, she’ll wear a distinctly-pattern article of clothing with black or brown, and wear her leather lace up boots with it. Her makeup might include some short eyeliner wings, colorful eyeshadow, and a lip shade depending on the mood she’s in. INSPO PICTURES BELOW

Vérène

Vérène’s style definitely underwent the most extensive changes, but ultimately her style isn’t that complex. Typically, she can be found wearing loose leggings (yoga pants?? I don’t know) and a pullover. As you might guess, that gets kind of toasty pretty quickly. Yet she seems to have a strange resistance to the heat! In rare occasions, she’ll wear baby doll tees instead. Most days though, she sticks to her comfort attire. If she wears skirts or shorts, she always wears tights with it. Her clothes are typically more muted in color, but it depends. When she wears cropped shirts, she likes to put on waist chains. Her makeup is usually more discreet, with typically more earthy and softer colors. Nice lashes are a must, though.

INSPO PICTURES BELOW

Mina

Her look is probably the most solidified by this point. She goes for the dark academia theme, wearing mostly large grandpa sweaters and cardigans with baggy cargo pants or scrappy jeans. Finding her in anything other than that is pretty rare. She chooses preppy Mary Janes or simple worn converse. She ALWAYS has her favorite crossbody bag with her, which she plans to keep around until it literally falls apart at the seams. She wears a lot of hair accessories, such as hair clips and barrettes. Her makeup looks vary. Sometimes she falls on the colorful side, other times she wants something more subtle. It just depends on the day. Sometimes she puts those little chains of beads on her glasses for some more accessorizing.

INSPO PICTURES BELOW

Maël

Last but not least, Maël! The boy! His style is more preppy in comparison to Mina’s, but still somewhat similar. He goes for a more put-together look. Nice turtlenecks with sleek necklaces, fleece pullovers, stiff-legged pants, and the like. Scarves aren’t unusual, though he typically goes without them. He doesn’t like feel weighed down by his fashion or clothes. His shoes are also a bit more classy. The best way I can describe them is loafers, haha.

INSPO PICTURES BELOW

Thank you for the ask!!! As always, feel free to send in more 💋💋

[noneedtofearorhope]

Understood that there’s no mandatory anarchist reading. Do you got any cool recommendations for anti-civ and green anarchy tho? I read Blessed is the Flame already and am interested in more

perhaps the coolest might maybe by chance be the ecodefense guide to monkeywrenching. focused on ways to attack and move toward the sort of future we seek.

im always recommending low-tech magazine, especially the solar powered version of the website (if you really want to go hardcore with it, you can also order the printed website). not really explicitely anti-civ, insurrectionary, or even radical (i seem to recall some rather reformist lib vibes at some point, but idr, so don't quote me), but focused on what a future/prefigurative society could look like, which i think makes it appealing for appealing to those not aligned with anticiv etc.

perhaps less specifically anti-civ and more broadly "post-left" is this article from do or die, which was a magazine you may find interesting as it was 'the voice of the british earth first movement', however ive only ever read this article tbh 😔😓😭

here are all 10 issues of do or die. i wouldn't necessarily recommend just reading thru them in order, but rather look at the various article titles and just follow whatever catches your interest

crimethinc has a lot of different voices going on, and they've changed over time, but overall they generally vibe pretty well with anticiv and green anarchy. to mix it up a bit and give your brain a bit of a rest, i'll recommend specifically pickaxe, but again just go browse what they have and follow your heart

i'd also like to give a shout out to zines and the punk scene. go to some shows if you're able, connect with people, hopefully someone is tabling, or maybe there are still some infoshops around and they got a show there, find a book or zine to read between or even during bands (great for if you're the type who is afraid to go to shows alone too btw)

could probably go on forever but hopefully that's some good leads for ya. enjoy.