#and i didn’t know what his face looked like probably til uhh right now?

[fictionfixations]

March 2023 (To-Do List)

Til I’m the Only One Left Alive // Whether or Not You Hate This Me // It’s Not My Turn to Die

(Past - Sports Festival)

Despite the fact that Izuku had skipped out on the sports festival, he was still in the stands with his classmates, silently watching.

It was from this that he took proper notice of Todoroki. Sure, it was ‘cool’ or whatever, and he was quite the powerhouse, but he noticed how his technique was less specific and controlled, and instead more.. ‘out there’. 

He’d have written him off as arrogant had it not been for the look on his face. Resentment. 

Todoroki had stiffened whenever Endeavor spoke. (He had half the mind to tell him to shut up)

And…

In all honesty, it almost reminded him of him and Midori. ..Or, Shin and Sou. Except more.. Sou of the death game, and Midori the floor master.

Except Endeavor kinda felt more like a brute.  He wasn’t sure if he wanted to know the answer of how he acted, (he had an idea already..) but, it wouldn’t hurt to look.

So after Todoroki’s fight with.. someone.. He stood up, keeping his steps light to get his classmates' attention away, and wandered around the area of where Todoroki had exited. 

Well, no one but students and Yuuei staff were meant to be here, but if a hero can yell and make a racket without anyone complaining… 

His efforts were not unfounded, as he found the shitty dad of the year yelling at his son. Something stupid about quirks and using his full power or something. 

He reached back towards his phone (residing in his pocket), turning it on with his quirk and recording, partly viewing through the camera to make sure they could discern what was going on, and with who.

“Ah, Todoroki-kun! There you are! I was looking for you!” Izuku interrupted, a fake cheerful smile on his face as he walked in, as if Endeavor wasn’t about to do something likely unjustly.

Both heads snapped to him, one in thinly veiled shock, and the other in annoyance. “Leave. This business has nothing to do with you. Don’t you see we’re busy?”

“Huh? As I see it, Mr. ‘Hero’, you’re trespassing on private property, interacting with a minor who is clearly uncomfortable with whatever you were doing and probably crossing boundaries, and likely abusing your power to get here. Do I continue?” 

Endeavor was clearly getting more and more irritated, while Todoroki didn’t seem to know how to react. It made sense, considering his father's status. It also didn’t paint a pretty picture.

“Foolish child, you have no idea what you’re talking about–” 

“Don’t I? As far as I can tell, you’re not meant to be here. Parent, or No. 2 hero or not. Others might be biased, but the staff aren’t. All it takes is one call. Do you really want to do this here? It might not be much, but who knows, it might lead into an investigation of your home life, and I’m sure you wouldn’t want any skeletons in your closet to be revealed, especially to the media. You know how difficult they are, eating anything up, even if it might not be true. So why don’t you take this somewhere else, and stop sabotaging Todoroki’s performance? Or do I need to simplify it so someone like you can understand?”

A pause. Sou almost laughed out loud at how angry Endeavor clearly was, considering how his flames grew in size, but trying to restrain it by not acting on it. The next best thing would be sprinklers activating to put him out and making him look like a wet dog. Actually, should he–

“..Midoriya.” Todoroki interrupted his thoughts, causing him to remember technically what he was here for.

“Ah, right! Todoroki, do you have a minute?” He didn’t wait for an answer, dragging Todoroki with him far away from his.. father? creator? likely abuser? 

Izuku decided not to address those thoughts, and once he felt like they were a safe distance away, stopped and let him go, smiling sheepishly. “Uhh, sorry about that. Just felt like something was off.”

It was clear to him that Todoroki likely felt lost. Now he really wished he activated the sprinklers on Endeavor. Who ever  looked at him and thought, ‘Nope! That boy is perfectly fine, no trauma to be found.’ ? 

“..Why did you..?” The other’s gaze felt searching, almost desperate. “Did you know?”

“Huh? ..No..?” He felt like he was kicking a puppy.

“But then how did..?”

He wasn’t prepared to deal with this, how does one even answer???

“Uhm. I don’t know about anyone else, but it’s not that hard to tell Endeavor isn’t really ‘dad’ material when he’s yelling in the stands and calling you a ‘masterpiece’ or whatever. I don’t know about what he did to you, but I’d think your scar is saying enough. And your hero costume.. It’s the exact opposite of Endeavor’s. Not that anyone but Yuuei knows of that, but still.”

A silent pause. What if he misunderstands and thinks everyone was blatantly ignoring??

“Not that it’s anyone else’s fault for not noticing? I think that.. Other people see things through rose-tinted glasses. They see heroes as infallible and perfect. Everything that’s good. But that’s just not true. They might not even be able to comprehend a hero doing bad.”

Todoroki’s brow furrowed. “..Oh.” ..Was that a good answer or not??

“Midoriya, could I.. tell you everything?” 

He tried his best attempt at a reassuring smile. “Of course. That’s what friends are for, right?” 

“Friends..” Todoroki whispered under his breath, like he was testing out the word. 

Long story short, he got trauma dumped on. Cool.

..At least he has a recording now?

He jumped at the sound of Present Mic’s voice, and rushed back. Even if he wasn’t going to join in, he’d still watch.

don't know what I did / but it was my fault / that's what you said

Izuku could barely stop himself. 

Everyone had a breaking point, and he just had a bad day. Running on low sleep because he’d been ranting about how much good the heroes do, while the other person was arguing that it just made people used to excessive violence and therefore stopped batting an eye.

(Okay, sure, but it helped people feel safer! It was something straight out of a comic book, heroes were. Something that was once unbelievable, a child’s dream, became reality. Everyone would be miserable otherwise.)

And today, Kacchan must’ve fallen on the wrong side of the bed, because he kept bothering him and causing such an inconvenience.

The second class ended, he dashed out to finally get away from Kacchan, only to get ambushed by his stupid lackeys!

..Okay maybe he was getting a little bitter, and maybe that was uncalled for, but you don’t hang around someone like Kacchan without picking up on a few hobbies.

“..Tsubasa-san.. Y-You don’t have to do this..” He still held out hope that there was some good in the winged boy, hoping that he could maybe hit something in him. (He wasn’t stupid, he knew mutant-type quirk users were bullied too, but he’d never seen anything during school. Maybe it was because the perfect victim was right there. Him. The quirkless kid.)

he almost wanted to tear at those wings. They were such a liability, nothing like Hawks’ where he can control the feathers to avoid such a threat. He’d be dumb not to realize in heroics that some villain would grab at it, especially with how big they are.. He’s just asking for something to go wrong by making enemies, and he can’t even go that fast anyway.. Maybe he should learn what it feels like to be quirkless, be berated and looked down on. Treated like glass. It's even better if just one wing remains because he’ll be taunted by the fact that he can’t fly, and oh what if he bleeds out to death when his wings are gone? But he’ll learn his lesson about his weak fucking quirk that he’s just trying to get over his own insecurities by beating up the quirkless kid even though Kacchan wouldn’t bat an eye at him, probably doesn’t even know his name–

“Oi. Stupid deku.”

He flinched, zoning back in, and mumbling in greeting. “K-Kacchan..”

Chapter 3: When I reached over to touch / your wound gently / I had realized you were ever slightly shivering

The next day was the true start, with no orientation (not that they ever got to see that), and now a full day.

(A/N: THATS IT- i havent started)

To be started:

Cheating Death Chapter 3

Echoes of a Past Unknown Part 2

And When We Meet Again, Will You See Me for Me? (Or Am I just a Ghost in your Story?)

[girloikawa]

uhh i hate to say this to all you fans of white boys but

these spot the difference games are getting awfully harder

[daryl-dixon-daydreams]

Words: 2,952 Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader Reader pronouns: she/her Era: The prison (Season 3) Warnings: language, that's it! A/N: Kintsugi, aka "golden joinery" is the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery with precious materials like gold and it is strikingly beautiful. I think you'll understand why I titled the fic this at the end! Summary: After Daryl leaves with Merle, he return to the prison to find that Y/N is extremely angry with him...

Your name: submit What is this?

Your face went through a rapid series of emotions as soon as his familiar broad shoulders came into view. First was shock and surprise, and then relief to see him again and to see him in one piece, and then just... anger. Daryl shifted his weight anxiously from one foot to the next, watching over everyone crowded around him as you simply stood up and turned your back on the room and left. You walked straight out and into the row of cells, disappearing through the heavy metal door. Daryl caught Rick’s eyes and the sheriff simply tilted his head and gave Daryl a knowing look. Daryl’s attention was pulled away as Carol grabbed him into a tight hug.

He was surprised when you didn’t come back out to join in the discussion of what the hell to do next about Woodbury and the Governor. He worked up the courage to try to talk to you, knowing full well it may just be an exercise in futility.

You easily heard the familiar cadence of his steps approaching your cell and the doorway darkened as his frame stopped in the space. He gripped the edge of the cell door and anxiously chewed his bottom lip.

You were sitting on the edge of your bunk, determinedly not looking at him. “Go away, Daryl.” Your voice was quiet but there was an unfamiliar edge to it.

He shifted uncomfortably but didn’t leave. “Just—would ya just talk to me?” he ventured. He saw the muscle in your jaw tense as your teeth clenched. “What is there to talk about?” “I—’M back now. I came back,” he said. He felt sick. He wasn’t used to you being angry with him and it was completely twisting him into knots.  “Yep,” you said, standing and going to the doorway. You pulled the hanging sheet in the doorway, a makeshift door, closed right in his face. “Leave me alone,” your voice came out from the cell and then he heard the springs of your bunk creak as you sank back down on it.  He stepped back from the fabric and dropped his hand from its grip on the doorframe, heaving a heavy sigh. Carol stepped out of her cell, just a few doors down and looked at Daryl staring at the closed sheet in front of him. He turned at the sound of her soft footsteps.  Carol’s brow was furrowed low over her eyes and she tilted her head in the direction of the staircase that climbed to the second level. Daryl’s hand clenched and unclenched in a fist and he gave your cell one last parting look before turning away to follow Carol up the stairs. She peeked at Judith in her makeshift bed and smiled. Daryl stopped beside her and looked down at the little sleeping bundle. His heart warmed at the sight of her, but his expression was still dark. Carol glanced over at him. He chewed on his bottom lip anxiously again. “She won’t even talk to me,” he drawled. “Give her a little time,” Carol said gently. “She’ll come around.” Carol sounded very sure of her assertion, but all Daryl could think was that he’d ruined things for good. “I came back,” he said, leaning back against the railing. His heart was aching with regret. Going off with Merle was stupid in the first place. Almost as soon as he’d done it he knew it was a mistake.  “You being back doesn’t change the fact that you left in the first place,” Carol pointed out. “You really think she doesn’t have a right to be upset? Think about how she’s interpreting you leaving.” He gave her a questioning look. Carol straightened up and stared at him. “I understand why you did what you did. He’s your brother. He’s blood. But you leaving with him... to her it means she wasn’t worth staying for. You chose Merle, a racist asshole, over all of us, and right when we’re sitting on the edge of war against the psychopath Merle worked for. I know that isn’t really what happened. It’s not that simple, but that’s what it feels like. She thinks you leaving means that... whatever there is between the two of you wasn’t worth anything. It wasn’t enough to make you stay.”

He gulped and shifted uncomfortably. “But that ain’t true...” Carol shrugged. “That’s how it seems to her.” 

Daryl ran a hand over his face and sighed again. “I really fucked up,” he growled. The grit and gravel in his voice was heavier than usual. “You did what you thought you needed to do,” Carol said, giving his shoulder a light squeeze. “Just give her a little time. She’ll cool off.” But the rest of the day, you stayed in your cell with the doorway covered. Daryl hung around hoping you’d step out so he could try to talk to you again, try to apologize and explain. He was sick with regret and guilt and worry, but you never stepped out. “Who’s on watch tonight?” Daryl asked Rick. He was thinking about offering to stay up and take both shifts because there was no way he would be sleeping that night anyway. He was too anxious. “Y/N first and then Glenn is taking the second shift. He gave Daryl a knowing look. The archer looked miserable. Rick sighed. “I’m just glad you’re back,” Rick said.

Daryl nudged his nose up in nod. “Yeah... thanks...” You’d be on guard first. You wouldn’t be able to hide in your cell forever. You could, however, still tell him to fuck off, but he had to try. Just waiting around was agonizing and he kept thinking about how in this world even the next minute wasn’t a guarantee. He had to make things right as soon as he could.

Night fell and after scraping together his courage, Daryl got up, knowing you’d be in the guard tower by now. He went to the little stove and heated up some water, pouring it over a tea bag in a mug and staring down at it. Yeah, bring her tea, dumbass. That’ll fix it. But regardless of that derisive voice in his head, he grabbed the mug and headed out to climb the narrow stairs of the guard tower, curls of steam wafting off the surface of the amber liquid. You turned when you heard the metal door from the stairwell creak open, thinking maybe Glenn couldn’t sleep and was coming to keep you company early. Instead you saw the broad shoulders of the archer coming through and you turned away and fixed your eyes on the darkness blanketing the prison yard. “What?” you asked sharply. Daryl gulped. Obviously you hadn’t cooled off enough yet. “I just—uhh.” He rubbed his hand awkwardly over the back of his neck. “I brought ya some tea,” he drawled.  You kept your back to him and said nothing. He edged closer and set the tea in front of you on the table. It was then that he noticed the bandage on your upper arm. He hadn’t noticed it before, probably because you’d been wearing a jacket. Without thinking, he reached out and gently grabbed your arm. “What happened?” 

You glanced at his hand on your arm and then up to his blue eyes. You felt your resolve crumbling as soon as your eyes met his. It was like some involuntary reaction you had no control over, but you tugged your arm from his grasp and shifted away from him, averting your eyes back toward the outside again. “I got shot,” you said. “What?” he urged. “The hell ya mean ya got shot?”

His voice was tinged with deep concern. “By one of those Woodbury assholes. You know, when you were off running around with Merle,” you replied. Daryl’s stomach twisted. How could he have been so stupid? If he’d been at the prison where he was supposed to be he could have protected you. What if it hadn’t just been your arm? He hadn’t even said goodbye to you... he’d just left. The hell was he thinking? You must have sensed his sudden panic because you looked over at him again and studied his face. “It’s just a bullet graze, Daryl.” Your tone was flat this time, but it was an improvement over the previous anger. “I’d rather be alone,” you said quietly. You hesitated. “Thanks for the tea.”

He gulped again. This distant tone you had was eating him alive and he felt his blood pressure rising. “Would ya just look at me at least? Gimme a chance to explain!”

You were a bit taken aback by his tone, which was now a little angry too, and you did turn to stare at him, your brow furrowed heavily now. “Explain?” You scoffed. “What the hell is there to explain? You made your choice. Your priorities are pretty damn clear. So, just—just leave me alone...”

“Nah,” he growled. “Not ‘til ya listen to me.”

You glared at him and he watched the muscle in your jaw tense as you clenched your teeth. “Actions speak louder than words, Daryl.”

“I fucked up, alright? I ain’t denyin’ that! I wanted to come back as soon as I left!” he roared. “‘M sorry!” “Sorry?” You stared at him, bewildered. “You’re sorry,” you repeated. “Yeah, well, so am I. Sorry I was stupid enough to think that maybe—” You broke off and shut your eyes, breathing in a tense breath. “That maybe what?” Daryl pressed you.

“That maybe I actually fucking meant something to you!” you yelled. There were angry tears in your eyes now and you fought to blink them away. “But if you could just leave then clearly I’ve deluded myself, because I could never do that to you. So, I guess I don’t know what this—” you gestured to yourself and then to him, “—is. Was. Whatever... apparently it’s nothing.” The archer stared at you feeling like his heart had split open. “That ain’t—that ain’t true. And it wasn’t that simple. S’not that simple.” He took a hesitant step toward you. 

Your jaw was still set. “Forget it. You don’t need to explain anything to me. It’s not like we were.... together. I was stupid to read into anything. I’m—I’m done. I’ll just send Glenn up later,” you murmured, trying to storm out of the guard tower, ready to race down the stairs and leave the whole mess behind you. But Daryl’s hand gently caught you as you tried to move past him, landing lightly but firmly on your arm.

“Nah. Don’t do that! Don’t just—just dismiss this!” he growled. 

You stared up at him, caught off-guard by his hand on you, by him physically stopping you from leaving. You were trying to think of something to say but your mind was suddenly blank. His hand finally dropped from your arm but instead of backing off he stepped closer to you. “This ain’t nothin’!” he argued. “And ya weren’t kiddin’ yerself. Now just stop bein’ so damn stubborn and talk to me!” You felt your resolve crumbling a little.  “I—I don’t have anything else to say!” you retorted angrily. “Now let me by!” You tried to brush past him again but he stepped right in your way. “Daryl,” you growled. “Get outta the way.” “Nah,” he said shaking his head. “Ya wanna be stubborn? Fine, but so will I.”

“Move!” you yelled at him again, feeling a flush of angry heat in your face. “No,” he said again, this time catching your eyes with his blue ones.

Your chest was heaving with angry and nervous breaths. “Let me go,” you said, and this time even you were surprised by how weak your own request sounded.

Daryl stared down at you, his posture defiant, obstinate. His heart was absolutely racing in his chest and he finally couldn’t suppress the urge any longer. He clasped your face in both hands and kissed you urgently, something he’d wanted to do for so long, but even more so since he’d tried to leave. It was all he could think about. A moment later he was sweeping you into him with a hand on your lower back.

You let out a noise of surprise and stumbled back, away from him, staring at him standing there with his chest heaving. “Wh—what the hell are you doing?”

Daryl gulped. Oh shit. Had he just fucked things up worse? He gestured vaguely with one hand. “This ain’t nothin’,” he drawled, breathless from his lips on yours. He stepped toward you cautiously again, half expecting you to move away or brush past him for the exit, but you didn’t move. He anxiously licked his lips, and you felt butterflies flit to life in your stomach. “‘M sorry,” he said again.

You stared at him, a quizzical expression on your face. You wanted his lips on yours again. “Say it again,” you said softly. You stepped closer to him. 

Daryl stared down into your eyes. The regret in his was plain. He slipped his fingers into your hair and clasped your face again. “‘M so sorry. I ain’t ever gonna leave again if I can help it.”

Your expression softened and you grabbed onto the front of his vest and pulled his lips down to meet yours, kissing him heatedly. Daryl’s hand landed on your lower back again and he pulled you against him, pressing forward so you were touching practically from knees to nose. His kiss was urgent, feverish. He pressed into you and you moved backwards blindly until you felt the table behind you. Daryl’s strong hands lifted you, setting you on the edge. You looped your arms around his neck and gently bit at his lower lip, eliciting a chesty growl from him. His hands wandered over your back and smoothed down your sides, feeling the curve of your waist and angles of your hips. They wandered down further and ran over your thighs, sending tingles of electricity up your back. You tugged him into you more tightly, feeling his hips pressing into the inside of your knees as you sat on the table. You slid a hand under his vest, around his back, and scratched your nails over the thin cotton of his shirt, feeling his strong, tense muscles beneath the material. He pulled back from you suddenly and your eyes opened, long eyelashes fluttering, disappointed and feeling the inches between your lips profoundly. “What is it?” you asked him, completely out of breath. He just stared down at you, not lifting his hands from your hips. “Nothin’. Just tryin’ to convince myself this is really happenin’,” he drawled, his eyes flitting between yours and your partially parted lips. 

You ran your fingers through his hair and he leaned into your touch. “It is.”

He looked suddenly nervous again. “Listen, I still wanna tell ya... I can’t entirely explain it. I know Merle’s an asshole. Of course I know that... But he’s my brother. And it was almost like I didn’t have a choice in the matter. I’d already left him once in Atlanta. I couldn’t do it again.” Daryl rushed on, still in vague disbelief that somehow you’d gone from yelling at him to kissing him in a span of a few minutes. “But as soon as we were alone out there... I realized he might be my brother but he ain’t really my family anymore. Maybe he never was.”

You gulped and nodded, pressing your hand flush to his chest and feeling his racing heart beneath your fingers. “I’m sorry I was so hard on you,” you said regretfully. “I was just—hurt.”

He nodded. “I can’t blame ya. ‘M sorry.”

You looped your arms around his neck again and he gave in to the gentle tug easily as you pulled his lips back to yours. The heat built between you again and you let out a small sigh as Daryl’s lips wandered from yours to kiss your neck and the delicate skin by your collarbone, his fingers tangling roughly into your hair. You found yourself arching into him more and more and Daryl was reeling as your fingernails lightly scratched his back, even over the fabric of his shirt. But the building heat was quickly quashed by the sound of the squeaky metal hinges on the door to the stairwell and both of you startled. Daryl spun around and you jumped up from your spot on the table, accidentally knocking the mug of tea to the floor, which of course shattered and sent liquid splashing everywhere. Your entire face flushed as you saw Glenn standing in the doorway with a surprised look on his face, one hand still on the doorknob. 

“Uhhhhh... sorry,” he mumbled. But his face quickly broke into a grin he tried to stifle. “I’ll just—I’m gonna go,” he said jutting a thumb back over his shoulder, unable to keep the amusement out of his voice. Daryl shifted uncomfortably next to you. Glenn turned on his heel and headed right back down the stairs and into the cellblock again. 

Rick, unable to sleep with the threat of the Governor still looming, caught sight of him returning and gave him a questioning look. “I thought you were on guard duty now?” he asked curiously. Glenn smiled and laughed a little awkwardly. “Uhh, yeah, but uhh—Y/N and Daryl have got it,” he said, his eyebrows lifting. “Y/N and Daryl? Isn’t she still pissed at him?” the sheriff asked, looping one thumb into his pocket. Glenn laughed again. “I’m pretty sure they made up... Night, Rick.”

[caitlesshea]

begging for footnotes in the story of your life

Ana learns a lot about Buck while she’s dating Eddie, like how Buck’s the one who should be dating him.

Ana learns about Buck in stages.

First from Christopher, when she was his teacher, and he would mention his Buck or draw Buck in family pictures. 

The second from the school nurse telling her that Christopher is being signed out to go home and she sees his name on Chris’ school forms. 

The third is from Eddie, when he brings him up as a work colleague even though she suspects it’s more than that.

She just doesn’t realize how much more until the first time she sees the inside of Eddie’s house. 

His house is homey, much cozier than she’d expect for a single dad who’s a first responder. She says as much and he chuckles.

“Some of this I did, but most was my Abuela.”

Ana nods and walks over to the mantle to look at the photos. 

She sees a picture of a younger Christopher sitting in a high chair between Eddie and a woman who she assumes is Shannon. 

“Shannon?” She asks quietly.

“Yeah. Chris, uhh, wanted to put some up.”

Ana nods and continues looking. There’s some more of Eddie and Chris, people she assumes are Eddie’s parents and his Abuela, and then there’s Buck.

Or well, she thinks it’s Buck, with how Chris has always described him. She notices one photo in particular that causes her to pause.

“Is that?”

Eddie reaches up and grabs the back of his neck, almost like he’s nervous. 

“Uh, yeah. Buck built him a skateboard, we tried it out at the park.”

So, Buck built Chris a skateboard after Ana wrongly said that Chris should know his limitations. 

“I’m sorry for saying what I said.”

“It’s fine, Ana.” 

“It’s not.”

Eddie shrugs and Ana considers bringing it up again but she chooses not to, instead focusing on a Christmas photo that was taken at the station; Eddie, Chris, and Buck in the back smiling. 

Eddie follows her eye movement and he smiles. “Buck and Athena set that up. We were on shift on Christmas and he surprised us with our families and dinner.”

“That was sweet.” Ana feels a little out of her depth here. She doesn’t think she’s ever seen this soft look on Eddie’s face before but she doesn’t want to ruin the moment. 

“It was, yeah.” 

They finish going through the photos, as Ana learns more about Eddie’s life. 

He makes them dinner, although he sticks a pan of lasagna in the oven so she doesn’t know how much he actually cooked. 

They’re about to sit on the couch, when he stops and says he’s going to grab something from his room. She follows him and notices for the first time that his room is a different sort of style than the rest of the house. 

It’s all dark blues and grays with some stylish lamps and photographs on the walls. 

She almost wishes she didn’t know about Buck now. 

“I like your room,” She comments while he grabs a blanket from the bed. It’s a soft black velvet.

“Oh, thanks. This was mostly Buck. My room apparently looked like a boring hotel room so he’s been giving me some of his stuff.”

“That’s?”

“Nice, right?”

No. She was going to say weird. But she nods instead. 

“The photo?” Ana asks as she walks closer to the print on the wall. It’s the typical California style photo, the palm tree lined street, but it’s in black and white, tasteful, where they’re usually cheesy. 

“Oh, uh, Buck took that. Had it framed for my birthday last year. Said it can remind me of why I moved us here, for a fresh start.”

“Huh.” Ana can tell it’s important to him, can tell that he loves the photo and the sentiment behind it. What she can’t tell is if he loves the photo more or the person who took it. 

“C’mon, let’s go watch the movie.” Eddie grabs her hand and she forgets about the room and Buck, at least for the night. 

~~~

Ana meets Buck in stages.

She thought she’d meet him at school, when he came to pick up Christopher, or at the school play, where Christopher was the main character, or at the science fair, or bake sale. All events she knows Buck was there for.

But, she never does. Whether it’s by luck or design, she doesn’t know. But she wishes she had, because she meets Buck, awkwardly, while on a date with Eddie. 

The one night Buck isn’t babysitting Christopher, Eddie’s Abuela watching him after Chris and Eddie’s talk, they run into Buck. 

So, she meets Buck outside of an ice cream shop. 

“Buck.” Eddie freezes beside her and she sees a tall man, taller than she thought with the pictures, with a cone halfway to his mouth. Buck lets out a sheepish smile and shrugs. 

That’s when Ana notices the woman next to Buck, she’s pretty, her red hair is gorgeous, and Ana thinks she looks familiar. 

“Taylor,” Eddie says clipped, in a voice she hasn’t heard from him since the skateboard incident. 

“Eddie,” The woman, Taylor, says just as clipped. 

Ana wonders what she missed. 

“What are you two doing here?” Buck asks and then he holds out his non sticky hand. “Sorry, Eddie’s rude, I’m Buck. You must be Ana.”

She nods and looks between Buck and Eddie who are giving each other eyes. “Yes, hi, it’s nice to finally meet you.”

“You, too.” Buck looks at Eddie and realizes no one is going to say anything else so he looks back to Ana.

“Would you two like to join us?” Ana asks out of desperation and Eddie looks at her incredulously. 

Buck looks at Taylor and she nudges him back. “We’d love to, but I have to get back to the station, I’m on nights right now. Next time? Buck and Eddie can schedule something.”

“Sure, bye Eddie. Ana.” Buck nods his head and she smiles at him. As they leave she can hear Taylor and Buck whispering to each other.

“That was awkward Buckley.”

“It’s not my fault he didn’t say anything…” Buck trails off and then they’re too far away to hear anything else.

Ana turns back to Eddie. “They seem like a cute couple.”

“Huh?”

“Buck and Taylor? You didn’t tell me he has a girlfriend.”

“He doesn’t,” Eddie says sharply. “They’re friends.”

“Oh, could’ve fooled me.”

“Why do you say that?” Eddie asks, looking at her for the first time since they ran into Buck.

“They seem close.” Ana shrugs. She doesn’t know why she has to explain anything, or why it would matter if Buck’s dating someone. 

“They, uhh, dated a couple years ago, but I think they’re friends now.” Eddie finally manages.

“Ohh. Okay. Friends with benefits. I get it.”

Eddie chokes on nothing and he looks a little green.

“Edmundo, are you okay?”

“Yeah, lets get that ice cream.” 

She nods and follows him into the ice cream shop, not surprised in the slightest when he orders the same flavor Buck was eating. 

~~~

The second time she meets Buck is at a party in his loft. Everyone is vaccinated and Buck wanted to have everyone over before his sister, Maddie, has her baby. 

Eddie introduces her to everyone; Bobby and Athena, Hen and Karen, Michael and David, Chimney and Maddie, Albert, and then Taylor.

“It’s good to see you again,” Ana says kindly as Eddie goes into the kitchen to grab them drinks. The loft is nice, modern, and looking suspiciously like Eddie’s bedroom, but she keeps that to herself. 

“Hey, not until after dinner. You’re worse than Christopher!” 

Ana looks over as Buck smacks Eddie’s hand with a towel as he tries to sneak cookies and Ana laughs at their antics, although no one else even so much as blinks their way. 

Taylor follows her line of sight and smiles. “Oh, they’re like that. You’ll get used to it.” 

Before Ana can respond she sees Taylor slide up to Buck and helps him with setting up the rest of the food. 

Eddie comes back over to her with a glass of wine and Ana smiles even as she notices Eddie’s face is pinched. 

Before Ana can grab it she spills some on her dress and Eddie curses.

“Shit, sorry Ana.”

“It’s okay. I’ll just grab a towel.”

“Buck, I’m taking her upstairs,” Eddie shouts to Buck and he looks over and nods.

Eddie guides her up the stairs and when she sees Buck’s bedroom, she pauses. It’s almost identical to Eddie’s in style and color. He even has the same photo hanging up on the wall. She says as much and Eddie smiles. 

“Oh yeah, he came to LA for similar reasons so he had one made for his place.”

“Huh.”

“There should be Shout Wipes in the bathroom. Medicine cabinet.” Eddie points to the bathroom as he sits down on Buck’s bed like he has every right to. He probably does. 

“Thanks. I’ll be just a minute.” 

Ana closes the door and finds a towel, wetting the stain first and then finding the wipes. As she cleans, she notices the meds in the bathroom. 

She knows she shouldn’t snoop but seeing Chris’ name on one of the bottles surprises her. It looks like Buck keeps extra medicine here for backup. She notices painkillers and Eddie’s favorite brand of shaving cream. 

Feeling like she’s crossed some sort of boundary she closes the medicine cabinet and is about to head back out when she hears voices from the room.

“You spill on yourself, too?” Eddie jokes and Buck groans.

“Albert ran right into me with the dip.”

“Sucks.”

“Seriously. I can’t wait til he leaves.”

“He could go back home, you know,” Eddie says gently as Ana hears what is likely a shirt being thrown in a hamper.

“I’m not gonna do that to Maddie.” Buck moves around and then asks. “Which one? Red or blue?”

“Blue, definitely,” Eddie responds and Ana can’t see them but she has to agree, whatever blue shirt Buck puts on will bring out his eyes.

“Good, I think this red shirt is actually yours.”

Eddie laughs and Ana pauses a moment because she’s never heard that laugh before. Part fond, part exasperated. She wonders why he laughs like that with Buck. 

“Makes sense.”

“Okay, come down when you’re done, I can’t have Albert setting my kitchen on fire.”

Ana can hear Buck heading down the stairs so she leaves the bathroom. Eddie stands to come closer and she accidentally blurts out what she’s thinking. 

“You have clothes here?”

“Huh? Oh, well I did live here for a couple of months, but with the firehouse and everything we all probably have each other’s clothes.”

Eddie says it so nonchalantly that Ana can’t even respond as he heads towards the stairs. He turns to look at her.

“Coming?”

“Yeah, sorry.” She doesn’t think it’s nonchalant at all. 

~~~ 

Ana meets Evan all at once. 

It’s her first night staying over at Eddie’s, with Christopher at Hen’s house for a sleepover of his own. 

She isn’t sure what wakes her up until she hears Eddie’s sleep rough voice.

“Evan?”

Who’s Evan? 

“Yeah, no, we’ll be there.” Eddie pauses as he sits up. “Don’t worry about it, I wouldn’t miss it.”

Eddie hangs up and looks at her sheepishly. 

“Is everything okay?” She asks as she sits up as well. 

“Yeah, Maddie’s gone into labor, so I was gonna head to the hospital.”

Huh? Eddie isn’t family, why is he going to the hospital?

“Okay. Let’s go,” Ana says instead of asking that question. 

“Are you sure? I can drop you off first.”

“No, it’s fine, we can go.” 

Plus this is a way for her to assert herself as an important person in Eddie’s life. 

“Thanks,” Eddie say, relieved, as he starts getting dressed. 

Ana follows suit and when they finally head to the hospital Eddie’s a bundle of nerves.

“She’ll be okay,” Ana says quietly as she places a hand on his leg. He nods but he doesn’t relax. 

He doesn’t relax, that is, until he sees Buck in the waiting room. 

“Evan,” Eddie breathes out as they hug. Ana’s momentarily shocked, because Eddie isn’t overly affectionate with anyone other than Christopher, but he hugs Buck like it’s a normal thing. 

Both of them calm down when they hug and then it hits her that Eddie called Buck ‘Evan’. She’s never heard someone call him that, but it must be his first name. 

She wonders when Eddie got that privilege. 

She feels like she’s intruding so she taps Eddie’s shoulder and he turns toward her. 

“I’m gonna grab coffee, you two want anything?” 

Buck smiles at her but Eddie answers her. 

“Black with cream for me, sugar and cream for Buck.”

“Okay.” Ana walks away and turns around just to see Eddie and Buck sitting down and bringing their foreheads together, almost unconsciously. 

“Oh, Ana, hey.”

Ana turns and sees Chimney.

“Chimney, hi. How’s Maddie?”

“She’s good. I’m grabbing her water. And waiting for Albert to get here. I take it you came with Eddie?” 

“Yeah. Is the whole station coming?” Ana asks even though she thinks she knows the answer.

“No. Only family. Hen and Bobby said they’d stop by after she’s born,” Chimney responds and then he’s quickly turning back towards the rooms. “Tell Albert when you see him that he comes in second since he’s late.”

“Sure,” Ana says quietly as she takes the coffee back to Buck and Eddie. After they grab theirs she sits next to Eddie and sees what they’re looking at on Eddie’s phone. 

“Is that Christopher?” She asks and Eddie nods.

“Yeah, I got so many photos of him when he was this age,” Eddie speaks quietly and Ana realizes that he got sent photos of Christopher because this must’ve been when he was deployed with the Army. He doesn’t talk about it much but she can tell Buck knows because Buck squeezes Eddie’s knee in support. 

The biggest shocker, though, is when Eddie grabs Buck’s hand and squeezes back.  

She once again feels like she’s intruding on something private, something theirs, and she doesn’t know what to do. 

Luckily she doesn’t have to think too much because Albert comes running in and he and Buck start arguing over who’s going to go in first, who’s going to be the better uncle. 

“Should we?” Ana gestures to them and Eddie shakes his head.

“Nah, they’re fine. This is fun for them.”

Ana nods and sits back to drink her coffee. Before she knows it, Chimney’s back in the waiting room telling them that Maddie and baby are fine and that they can all come meet her. 

Buck and Eddie jump up and Ana trails behind with Albert. 

“You don’t want to run in there?” She asks Albert.

“Oh I do, but I don’t want to overwhelm Maddie.”

Ana nods and keeps walking towards the room. When she gets there what she sees stops her in her tracks. 

Buck is holding his niece and Eddie, well, Eddie is staring at him with so much love, adoration, and abject want that Ana feels like she’s intruding. 

Eddie turns to her and holds out his phone. “Can you take a picture? I promised Chis I would show him before he meets her.”

“Sure,” Ana says like she’s underwater. Eddie’s lockscreen, a picture of Buck and Chris, barely registers. 

She hears the baby's name, Kylee Danielle, after her uncles, and watches as Buck tears up, and Eddie grabs the back of his neck. 

She then watches Buck pass Kylee to Eddie, and if she wasn’t so shocked she would notice the way Buck was watching him, the way Maddie was watching her, and the way Albert was videotaping everything. 

She would notice that Eddie looked damn good holding a baby. 

If she didn’t feel like she was intruding on a private family moment. 

She doesn’t belong here. She doesn’t belong with Eddie. 

She looks toward Maddie and Chimney, Maddie has kind but sad eyes looking at her and Ana knows now that she’s not who Eddie is meant to be with. 

“Congratulations,” Ana says quietly. “Eddie, I’m gonna go.”

“You don’t have to go,” Eddie says as he hands Kylee to Albert.

“I do. It’s okay, I’ll call you.”

It shouldn’t surprise her when he nods and turns back to the others but it does. 

She nods to Maddie and Chimney and then to Buck, who’s looking at her with an odd expression on his face. 

“It was nice to see you again, Evan,” Ana says and she hears his breath catch. 

She calls an Uber, waits outside for it, and when she finally gets home, she realizes she took some photos on her phone, too.

Ana looks at them, sees Eddie and Buck, looking like they belong together, and sends them to Eddie with the text ‘you have a beautiful family.’ 

~~~

Ana learns about Edmundo and Evan Buckley-Diaz when she gets a change of name form for one Christopher Buckley-Diaz. 

Along with the name form is an official form of guardianship for Buck, declaring him Christopher’s other father. 

~~~

Years later Ana learns about Ellie Buckley-Diaz when her fathers drop her off for her first day of kindergarten. 

“Eddie. Buck. Hi,” Ana greets them as they come out of the front office, paperwork in hand and an excited five year old bouncing on her toes. 

“Ana,” Eddie says warmly and Buck smiles. “Principal now?”

“Yeah, for a couple of years.”

“Congrats.” Eddie smiles and then turns to his daughter who pulls on his shirt sleeve. 

“Daddy, I want to see my classroom.” 

“I’ll take you,” Buck responds and gives Ana a smile. He squeezes Eddie’s shoulder once and then takes Ellie’s hand. 

“Papa! We have to see it right now!” 

“Okay, okay, little monster, we will,” Buck chuckles after her. 

Ana turns back to Eddie and he smiles after them and then turns to her. 

“I’m happy for you,” Ana says and Eddie looks at her curiously.

“Thank you. I am sorry about how…”

“Water under the bridge.” Ana waves her hand and points to a photo of her and her son, Milo, and Eddie smiles. 

“He’s beautiful.”

“Your daughter is, too.” Ana wants to say she looks like a perfect mix between the two of them but she keeps those thoughts to herself. 

They’ve never been close enough for that kind of conversation. 

“Thank you. She’s certainly energetic, takes after Evan,” Eddie says this with such fondness that Ana’s thrown back to the hospital when Kylee was born, and how he looked at Buck even then. 

“Nothing wrong with that.”

“Nope. Well, it was good to see you, I’m sure we’ll run into each other again.”

“Yeah, of course.” Ana smiles as he walks away, towards his family.

Ana looks at the photo of her son again. 

Learning all of these things about these great people led her to her greatest joy. 

She can’t be mad about that. 

[a-aexotic]

detention and the picture of dorian gray. | s.b

pair: f!reader x stanley barber

warnings: language, the word "slut" being used, mentions of food, weed in use. word count: 1.8k summary: y/n gets detention because she refused to change into something else. she then meet stanley barber, the king of breaking uniform himself.

a/n: big thanks to liane my love for helping me with this fic 😩👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 (@amourtentiaa). tags: @nothinghcppens @eunoniaa @isolemnlyswearpevensie @aspiringsloth20 @thatslovelymoony @amourtentiaa @vsawyer1989 @fives-cup-of-coffee

Y/N SAT QUIETLY IN MRS. JEFFERSON'S ENGLISH CLASS AS SHE PLAYED WITH THE EDGE OF HER SKIRT. she had gotten this plaid skirt from her aunt the other day. she usually doesn't go for skirts but this skirt just looked too cute to pass on.

she let out a yawn, glancing at the clock. she moved her gaze to her friend syd with a small smile. the girls were planning on getting milkshakes after school, and y/n was excited to leave school.

the bell rung and y/n got up as fast as she could, grabbing her backpack and pencil, heading for the door. syd was taking her time gathering her stuff, so y/n got to the door faster than her.

"ms. l/n, you know that skirt is against dress code?" mrs. jefferson eyed y/n, judgement in her expression. y/n narrowed her eyes on the teacher, knitting her eyebrows.

"since when are skirts against dress code?" y/n replied coolly, as syd let out a small chuckle.

mrs. jefferson's eyes widened as she got up. "it's short. a distraction, if you will. you should try wearing something modest. i'll get you a slip so you can call your mother-"

"excuse me? modest? well sorry to break it to you, mrs. jefferson, modest isn't-"

"how dare you interrupt me? detention!" mrs. jefferson bickered as y/n rolled her eyes, as syd watched in amusement. the teacher gave her a slip, and watched as the girls walked out.

"whatever, and i'm not changing." y/n rolled her eyes in annoyance as her and syd walked down the hallway to their next class.

Y/N WALKED IN THE GYM WITH CROSSED ARMS AND A PINCHED EXPRESSION. she saw there was only two other people there - stanley barber (the king of breaking dress code) and jenny tuffield. she was a few minutes late, but she needed to use the restroom.

she sat down near stanley with a huff and put her backpack directly next to her. she tapped her foot as she waited for something to happen, for someone to talk.

jenny finally sighed and faced the two. "so, why're you both here? you seem like . . . goody two shoes."

y/n narrowed her eyes on the girl, "mrs. jefferson called me a slut, basically."

"a slut?" stanley choked out with a laugh, causing the girls to glare at him. "w-why? you're not a slut,"

"because my skirt is short." y/n let out a groan, and rolled her eyes at the mere thought of mrs. jefferson calling her skirt short. it wasn't short! and plus, she has shorts under it anyway.

"yeah mrs. jefferson is a sour old bitch who was way to much free time on her hands." jenny nods in agreement with another loud sigh, laying her head on the bench behind her. "what about you?"

"um, didn't do my homework," stanley said as y/n nodded along to his words.

"well, that sucks." y/n states as she gave him a small smile. she expected him to might've broken dress code or something, but it was something else.

the principal walked into the gym with a angry expression, as if to scare them. jenny didn't move her, instead she stared at the principal.

"you kids are here today because you disrespected teachers," he eyed y/n. "or didn't do what you were supposed to do. you are to clean this whole gym. and i will be checking it after." he seemed done with our bullshit, so he sighed and left the gym, "don't fool around, i will know."

"he doesn't actually check, i've been in detention a million times and i haven't done a single thing." jenny whispered with a smirk, turning her body to face us. "so . . ."

"so," stanley echoed, looking around the gym. y/n was not going to clean the entire gym, but the others didn't seem like they wanted to talk at all. she took out a book for her reading class, opening it. stanley took out a rubik's cube.

jenny yawned and took her bag, getting up and walking to the bathroom. stanley glanced at y/n with an interest etched in his expression. "what are you reading?"

y/n turned her head to stanley, "um, the picture of dorian gray. it's for mr. white's class."

stanley nodded with a smile. "do you like it? what page are you on?" he moved closer to y/n, looking onto the book with her.

"192, i'm pretty much in the middle. it's nice, but i probably wouldn't read it on my own. i don't read the classics unless i have to, i prefer modern romance - or like, greek mythology."

"oh, that's nice. i like comics more than books, i don't think i have a good enough attention span to read an actual book, y'know?" stanley spoke as y/n nodded along.

"same here, i guess it depends on the book." y/n smiled. "do you think the principle will actually come check on us?"

stanley shook his head, "uhh, no! why would he? plus, i'm sure jenny was right. who'd take the time out of their day . . . and use it to check if a bunch of kids cleaned an entire gym?"

y/n laughed as stanley smiled. "you're right." an awkward silence fell between the two as they looked around the gym. y/n decided she needed to use the restroom, so she put the bookmark in the book and got up. "bathroom,"

stanley smiled awkwardly and nodded. "u-uhh, have fun!"

y/n laughed and nodded, walking down the stands and walking to the door. she opened the heavy door, walking into the bathroom. she looked for any sign of jenny after a few seconds of silence, but there was no sign.

y/n scoffed, "bitch!" she quickly washed her hands before walking out of the bathroom. stanley was laying on the bench, playing with the rubik's cube.

"stanley, jenny left!" y/n crossed her arms walking up to the boy. stanley sat up, scoffing. "should we . . . ditch too? i mean, jenny did. why shouldn't we?"

"yeah, sure," stanley breathed out. he took his backpack, and gave y/n's hers. he grabbed her book, handing it to her. "where are we going?"

y/n smiled as she took the book and put the book in her backpack. "we should get milkshakes, at that diner."

stanley nodded and got up from the stands. "okay, let's go!"

y/n let out a laugh, walking beside stanley.

THEY WERE FINALLY ON THE MAIN ROAD, WALKING TO THE DINER. y/n lead the way, as stan was a few steps behind. "don't you have a car, stanley?"

he nodded, "i didn't drive it here today. my dad's home, so -"

"oh," y/n nodded knowingly. "you don't have a good relationship with your dad?" this was definitely not something you ask when you first meet someone, but if the shoe fits, the shoe fits.

he walked next to y/n, "yeah nope. i hate him." he paused, "well i don't really hate him, he's my dad. you can't ever really hate your dad, y'know?"

y/n nodded. "makes sense. dads aren't too great, if we're being honest."

he laughed with a nod, "yup, they suck. dads, who needs 'em?"

"yeah, as long as you have a good few friends and a good hangout place, you're good to go. that's what my aunt says," y/n smiled as stanley nods.

"well, she's right." stanley says with as he looked ahead. "i like your skirt, it isn't slutty. it's cute,"

y/n's face went red as she awkwardly laughed, "thanks. i like your jacket,"

he faced her with a smile, "thanks. i found it at the thrift store . . . pretty sure it's like, older than my grandpa. but i washed it! so we're all good."

"vintage and hand me down clothing is cuter, if we're being honest. if it has history, it's better." y/n spoke as stanley nodded along.

"yeah," stanley agreed as he took out a tin with weed, taking one out and offering one to her. "want one?"

y/n has never had weed before, and she's never thought she'd ever agree to smoke . . . especially in public. she nodded and took it from his hand. "i've never smoked weed before, i've vaped before-"

"vaping is nothing like weed, y/n. it is amazing," stanley winked at the girl, giving her a lighter. "do you know how?"

"you just inhale and exhale, right?" y/n whispered as she looked the weed.

"let me do it first," stanley says as you handed it back to him. he placed it in his mouth, and lit it slowly. he inhaled and took it out, and slowly blew it out. "here,"

y/n takes it and copies his actions - inhaling and slowly exhaling. she coughed out loudly, as stanley laughed loudly. "how'd i do?" y/n coughed out.

"you did good, uh, for your first time." stanley smiled as y/n rolled her eyes playfully.

"just say i did horribly and get it over with," y/n said in a joking manner as stanley shook his head.

"you did good! i promise," stanley laughed. "you want some more?" he took a long draw before handing her the blunt. she nodded, taking it. she a small draw, and this time she didn't cough as hard. "now that one, was good."

"i thought my first one was good!" y/n laughed loudly as stanley smiles.

"that one was better!" stanley spoke as she nodded. she handed him the blunt, and he took another draw. "you didn't cough, that's good."

they went back and forth with it, and soon enough, they were on their forth blunt and were very high. they decided not to go to the diner, but instead, a park.

it was around 6 pm, and they were on a bench. stanley had his head on y/n's shoulder as they talked. "so, you're dad's like . . . gone most of the time?"

he nodded. "yup, it's all good until he decides he wants to come home."

"i'm really sorry, stan. your dad doesn't deserve you,"

he looked up at her from her shoulder. "yeah, i can't wait til i can go to college, away from him. it'll be the best day of my life." y/n nodded, as they kept looking up at they sun setting. "hey y/n, do you . . . do you think there's like, a genuine meaning to life?"

"maybe. i-i don't think there is a genuine meaning to life." she paused as stanley looked up at her. "i think you have to create your meaning. if you think about it, nothing ever matters until you make it matter. your life can have a million meanings or one. it's your life, only yours."

she looked down at stan, "what do you think?"

"i think you're high off your mind right now, y/n. but uh, that was beautiful." he laughed as y/n scoffed.

"thank you,"

"we should get going, now." stanley sighed as he lifted his head from her shoulder. "let me walk you home."

"yeah," she sighed as she got up. "want some perfume? because uh, we smell like weed,"

he laughed. "nope, i'm fine. my dad'll think i have a girlfriend or something."

y/n smiled as they started walking. "we should hang out more."

he nodded, "sure. let's do that."

[drsenkustone]

Dance Partner (Senku x Reader)

A/N: Just a little drabble since I haven’t written anything for almost 5 months T_T Covid crap has taken a lot of spirit out of me. But please enjoy!

Ship: Senku x Reader Anime: Dr. Stone Rate: PG Warnings: None (Somewhat AU, if the stone age didn’t happen, they all still in high school.) ____________________________________________________

You stared at Yuzuriha before taking a bite of your sandwich, in shock to what she just suggested. You two were sitting together at a picnic table outside the school enjoying your lunch until she said those words that made your cheeks turn pink.

“You can’t be serious…?” You asked.

“Of course I am!” She smiled, tapping your hand lightly in comfort. Even in your disbelief, you still went back to eating. “You’re coming to the dance and need a date and Senku will need one too! You should ask him to go with you, even as friends.”

“Senku is going because they asked him for tech support, not because he wants to dance,” you rebutted. “He’s not the type to dance either, it makes sense. Besides, no body NEEDS to have a date, it’s just something peer pressure does.”

“Okay, forget the date part. I think he would dance with you, I think there’s a part of him that treats you a little bit different from everyone else.” Her words had your heart race in excitement, but you didn’t want to believe a possible lie. “But no matter that, I know how you feel about him, (y/n),~ and you should confront those feelings” she stated, glancing up to see the loud child Taiju heading over with Senku in tail, both carrying lunches. She glanced back to you.

“Don’t even…” you warned, earning a giggle from her.

“I won’t…but at the dance, you should at least ask him to dance.”

“I never said I was going!” You huffed quickly before the boys got to the table to join lunch.

You glanced down at yourself in the mirror of home, dressed in one of your finer dresses. It was a deep navy blue with some tints of glitter lightly placed through a mesh overlay. The top fit as a halter and the dress ended above your knees. You added simple black short heels (since high heels hurt horribly on any occasion) and a white, clean jacket to keep you warm. Yuzuriha was a great talker when she wanted to be, you couldn’t believe you were going to this event.

At arriving at the school, you entered the loud cafeteria, running at least a half hour late to the event. Many students were partying to the beat or drinking or snacking, it seemed like fun. That’s when Yuzuriha and Taiju snuck up on you from behind and you let out a small gasp at their cheers.

“Ahhaa! You really did come (y/n)!” Taiju cheered, looking snazzy in his chocolate brown tuxedo, bow tie and all. Yuzuriha seemed to try to match, wearing a chocolate brown dress, it was really cute couple things you didn’t understand.

“Well…she kind of bullied me,” you teased Yuzuriha, earning a grin from the latter.

“You’ll have fun, we’re all here and can dance together! And Senku’s here too!” She smiled and pointed up to the tech booth on the side of the cafeteria. Your eyes automatically followed, seeing the spikey haired man talking to another tech squad on the platform. You didn’t even consider that Senku would dress up a bit too- he was wearing a smile black and white tuxedo, tie done properly and his eyes glowing in the lights. You felt your heart skip a beat watching him work. “C’mon, let’s go!” Yuzuriha interrupted your thoughts and the couple dragged you onto the dance floor.

As you figured, over the time, your feet grew tired and you sat yourself out during a couple high energy songs and now they played some slow, romantic songs. It was nice seeing two of your best friends so happy in each others arms, they really seemed to be made for each other.

“You jealous?” You glanced up at the voice besides you to see Senku suddenly sitting next to you at the table. You knew he looked handsome from afar but up close felt very threatening to your heart. You huffed at his comment, trying to hold your heartbeat in your chest.

“No…I’m just happy for them, that’s all” you responded, looking back to your friends, Senku’s eyes doing the same. You were happy for them, that wasn’t a lie…but you couldn’t help but picture that being Senku and you. Him holding you close around the waist, your arms over his shoulders staring into each others soul. The idea felt so nice…

“Senku?...” He looked over to you, his ruby red orbs meeting your (e/c) ones. You had to be brave like Yuzuriha said, otherwise you’d be dreaming forever. You choked down the frog in your throat. “Do…do you want to dance..with me?” You tried to keep eye contact, it was so hard. He was the one that broke it and looked down to the floor. It seemed like he had a sad smile on his face.

“I’m sorry (y/n), I don’t dance.” He responded somewhat solemnly, refusing to look back up to you. You also stared at the ground now, biting your bottom lip to hold back what felt like tears on the edge of your eyes. You knew that was going to be his answer…you were just hoping you’d be the one above that answer…the only one he would dance with.

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it,” you were able to say and stood up. “I have to head to the ladies room, excuse me,” you muttered and respectfully walked away. No matter what, the last thing you wanted was to make your friendship awkward. Senku probably thought it was a simple offering, but it held more to you, you just needed to let some of it out alone. Little did you know, Senku sighed softly before going back up to the platform, he couldn’t do it.

Eventually, Yuzuriha found you camping out in the restroom and was there to provide some comfort. She got you to dance with her and Taiju for some more fun songs, but your heart wasn’t in it. It wasn’t much longer until students start to leave, the dance floor becoming more empty. Soon, all the students were gone besides a few to clean up, including your trio. You went over to grab your coat when the tables and floors were good before Taiju had grabbed your hands.

“(Y/n)!” he yelled, causing you to wince a bit, but you were use to it. “I..I have something I need you to do before you go!”

“You do?” He nodded vigorously. “What is it?” He quickly covered your eyes with your own hands and proceeded to guide you somewhere.

“Keep your hands on your eyes til I say! It’s a surprise!” Taiju instructed while you two walked.

“Didn’t you just say you needed me to do something? How can I do it if I’m blind?”

Taiju bit his lip, “Uhh, well you’ll do it when I show you!” he grinned, you could basically hear his grin. Eventually, the two of you came to a stop and he let go of your shoulders by which he was guiding you. “Okay, so count down from three and then remove your hands!”

You sighed softly. “Three…two…one.” When you dropped your hands, you saw Senku standing in front of you, a soft smile on his lips and his red ruby eyes large. “S-senku?” You questioned and then noticed you were STILL in the cafeteria, but the lights were darker and soft, no one else was in the room and the doors were closed. You looked at him in confusion.

“I’m no dancer, whether separated or partnered,” he stated, taking a step closer to you and offering a hand. “But I am your friend, I want to be there for you.” He stared directly into your eyes, and you weren’t sure if you were more hurt by his words, or happier. Regardless, you took his offered hand and stepped closer to him. His other hand, seeming to hold a remote, clicked a button before putting it in his pocket, and a slow, romantic lullaby began to play.

He put his hands around your waist, connecting them at the back. It was awkward, he wasn’t the physical touch kind of person. You rested your hands over his shoulders and connected behind his head, and the two of you began to sway side to side, seeming like a good start. You felt over the quiet time, his arms became more relaxed holding you. It wasn’t until you spoke that either of you realized you had been staring each other in the eyes the whole time.

“Senku…” you began, voice as soft as a cloud. “I want to know…if you can be there for me more…than just a friend.” It took so much courage for you to say that. Being you don’t know why he was here right now, dancing with you alone in the cafeteria.

“From what Taiju has told me, I need some time,” he replied, voice almost equally as soft. “I think with time…I can be…just like this dance.” His cheeks grew a tint of red while he watched your reaction. Your eyes were widened by his words, your own cheeks flushing and a smile trying to pry onto your lips, somewhat successfully.

“So..you’re saying..this dance…?”

“…It’s hard for me to do this in general, to be close to someone on this level. But I considered with a little help from two lovebirds, maybe there was another option.”

“You thought of all this for me?” You watched Senku nodded shyly.

“I just need time…” he repeated softly, closing his eyes and dropping his head a bit.

“Take all of it you need Senku, I will wait for you,” you dropped your head slightly too, both heads resting against each other while dancing slowly to the song.

[xmyshya]

Soft

summary: I am a firm believer that Atsumu CAN be soft. When he wants to. And now he just might. genre: fluff, crack, smut warnings: fem!reader, soft Atsumu, sexual tension, making love at the end, MINORS DNI special thanks: HQHQ and our lovely Atsumu sessions, you guys gave me so much inspiration for the last part. I love you. I love you all. a/n: I don’t want to say that I’m proud of this one, but I am. wc: 2.7k

Looking at the friend sitting across the table in the quiet corner of this adorable cafe, you can’t help but think how crazy it has been. Mostly because he’s an idiot, but you LOVE that idiot. “Y/N? Are ya even listenin’?” “Uhh… yes?” “What were ya thinkin’ ‘bout so hard anyway?” “Okay, uhm, remember when…”

The gym was huge and offered a lot of equipment, half of it having names you’d never heard before. The only problem? It was constantly crowded. Except for crazy early hours, which is why you were dressed in your tracksuit and drenched at 5 am. Yet, you were still not alone at this ungodly time. On the first day, he visibly hesitated before entering, clearly wanting absolutely no company. You couldn’t really blame him, he was probably followed by throngs of fans and paparazzi every day. The man must have deemed you harmless however, because he stayed. Well, at the other end of the enormous room, but stayed. He came back on the next day. And next one. And another, and soon enough you were nodding at each other in a silent greeting. This odd ritual continued on for a few weeks, until… “Hey, ya… come here often?” Fuckfuckfuck, he was still sporting the smug smile, though his eyes were filled with panic. You stared at him dumbfounded. Guess even celebrities struggle sometimes. “Uhh… I… N-no, this is my first time.” Both of you erupted in laughter. “Miya Atsumu, nice to meet ya.” “Oh yeah, I know.” He raised an eyebrow. “I mean… L/N Y/N, nice to meet you too”

“D’ya really gonna rub it in ma face til the end of ma life?” “Nah, I’m pretty sure I’ll forget when I’m old, so I gotta make use of it till I can.” The blonde doesn’t look happy. Amusing. “So what were you talking about?” “Oh right, so there’s gonna be a party for the team and friends, and… uhh… would you like to… be my plus one?” Of course you would like to. Love to. “Lemme know what colours ya wanna wear.” “Ehh? You wanna match or something?” There is a teasing undertone in your question. He either misses it or ignores. “I’ve always wanted to do that…” But you already know. Black and gold, the colours of his team. Yes, obviously that’s the only reason. It’s completely unrelated to your current imaginations of Atsumu looking smoking hot in a black fitted suit, black shirt, and matte gold tie. Totally not.

You’re still adding final touch ups, when the doorbell rings through the air. “Open!” In response there’s a click of the door, opening and closing, and Atsumu announces his arrival with a sigh saying why aren’t ya ready yet. “I’m coming, I’m coming.” You shift from your bedroom to the hall, and he whistles. Sharply. You know you look good in that black dress, hugging tightly all your curves (extra points for a deep notch on the back and thin golden chains), and golden heels. And now, he knows it too. Just like you assumed, he does look great. So great, that the only image filling your head as your eyes run down and up on him is how much you want to rip that suit off of him. Party? You’d rather have a one-on-one party against the wall he’s leaning on. Or a kitchen counter. Or a sofa. Shower maybe? “Are ya checkin’ me out?” Again that smug look on his face. You really want to wipe it off. With your lips. “Must be your imagination.” You push him out of the apartment and lock the door.

One of the greatest mysteries of this world must be why elevator scenes are so… weird. Weirdly hot. You’re both on the opposite ends of the tiny cube, ogling each other and turning your gaze away. “Ya really look beautiful.” “Thank you.” Silence. “You look great too. Perfect ten.” You look him straight in the eyes, and if you have the timing right… “Very fuckable.” Ding and the door opens. You brush his chest while walking out. Atsumu forgets to leave the elevator.

Party hall is already swarming with people when you arrive. Faces from magazine covers flash here and there, some of them entertaining whoever wants to listen, some whispering mysterious promises in eager ears, some just roaming around in search of god knows what. “I’ll get us some drinks” is one of those promises, and Atsumu leaves your side. He’s quickly replaced by one of those roaming creatures. “You here alone?” He’s much too close to your liking. “Actually I-” “You’re beautiful. Absolutely stunning. I’m Shugo-” “Meian!” The voice of your companion startles you with its sudden proximity, but also brings comfort. As soon as the drink is passed in your hand, you feel his touch on the small of your back. “Oh, I didn’t know you two were-” “We’re not.” “We’re friends.” Both of your replies come immediately. Meian straightens up and smiles. “So, you wouldn’t mind if I went for her?” “Not like I have any right to stop ya.” Miya says calmly, but you can feel his whole body tense up against yours.

“Alright everyone, we’d like to make a toast…” Clinking of glasses interrupts your surprisingly pleasant conversation with the MSBY captain, but soon enough he’s back to flooding you with questions. Atsumu walks away to join his other teammates. “Please excuse me.” You don’t even look at the male next to you, focused only on catching up with the blond friend. His questioning gaze burns a hole at the side of your head. “I came here with you.” “Is that the only reason?” Your eyes meet and you give him a lopsided grin. “Nah, you’re much hotter.” He stands a little taller, visibly more confident, fuller of himself. His hand finds its way to your hip and he pulls you a little closer.

Next two hours are spent on the dance floor, countless people already pulling you back before you even step outside of the designated area. You’re currently trapped in the arms of none other than Bokuto Koutarou, and you could swear you were swayed by the sheer force of his alone. But you don’t mind, his energy of a nuclear reactor and megawatt smile fully compensate for any inconveniences. The song comes to an end however, and you quickly follow him back to the table. “Ya don’t wanna dance anymore?” Atsumu asks when you settle in your chair, looking for something to replenish your energy. “Why?” “Ya looked so happy on the dance floor. And yet, yer sittin’ here now.” “Were you watching me this closely?” His ears fire up like Christmas lights. “I do.” “Huh?” “I do wanna dance.” For a moment you’re both just staring at each other in silence. Then you notice gears turning slowly in his head, and, at the moment of realisation, a light bulb. “May I please have this dance?” He holds a hand out, and you place yours in it. Atsumu leads you towards the swaying crowd, and then pulls you close. So close, that your bodies could merge. “And the next one too.” He purrs in your ear.

Miya’s breath on your skin is hot and distracting. Does he feel you shiver every time he exhales on your neck? He must, you conclude, since his palm is resting on your bare back. “Ya smell so good…” The whisper caresses your ear, his lips so close, yet so far. “Mmm… you too.” And those lips curl up.

It’s not just this dance. And not just the next one either. Many dances later and you’re still glued to his body, surrounded by a muscular arm, and one hand still in his. The other one playing mindlessly with his undercut. “Looks like Meian found someone to take home t’night.” “Hmm? Did you?” You pull a strand of his hair and lightly scratch his nape. “Do that again and I might get dangerous.” “Maybe I like doing dangerous things?” There’s a movement near your thigh, and you both hope those words carry a promise.

It’s well into the night and people start leaving, but it seems like the blonde is still not ready to let you out of his embrace. You lean your head on his shoulder, forehead right under his jaw, and let him rock you gently to the slow music. With eyes closed, breathing in his scent, it feels almost as if you two were the only people here. “Are ya tired?” You only purr in response. “Lessgo home then. Wanna stay at mine?” “Oya?” “I-i-it’s… not whatcha think… A won’t… won’t touch ya.” “But if you won’t, then what’s the point?” He freezes, agape, and you wonder how the hell someone so hot can become so flustered. “But seriously, I don’t have a change of clothes” which is a lie, because you do have spare panties in your tiny purse “or cosmetics, or-” “I’ll give ya somethin’ to sleep in.”

The door behind you closes with a quiet click. God, it feels so good to finally, finally take these heels off. You put your purse on a drawer right next to the door, and proceed to take your earrings off, placing them neatly in a tiny pouch. “Tsumu? Could you help me with the necklace?” He doesn’t say anything, instead coming behind you and trying to unclasp the piece of jewelry. Trying, because his hands shake. You take a sneak peek at him through the mirror, at his focused face and slightly poked tongue. He’s so adorable. In the meantime you reach to your hair and start removing the pins, but soon your hands are pulled away and replaced with his. It’s surprising but endearing how gentle this giant man can be. You close your eyes and just enjoy the moment, as your strands tickle your nape one by one. And then something hot and wet tickles your neck, right below your ear. Oh. Oh. “A… ‘m sorry, a didn’t mean to…” Nononono, come back here. You grab his tie and pull him down to a kiss, a searing clash of lips, slowly beginning to move against one another. One of his hands caresses your back, right under the edge of your dress, the other one pulls your hair gently making you gasp. His tongue slides along your lips painfully slowly, and you chase it with yours until the tips meet. The feeling is electrifying, sending shivers through your whole body.

Undressing Miya Atsumu is similar to unwrapping a Christmas present you’ve been waiting for for months. Button after button, you reveal more and more of his heavenly sculpted chest and stomach, your lips following the hands. He loves it, the feeling of your wet muscle soothing the bites drives him crazy, little purrs he lets out make his chest vibrate. It’s almost unbearable. He decides he can’t take it anymore when you hook your fingers under his pants and start unzipping them, grazing his cock. He pulls you close, sliding your dress off of you, and letting it pool at your feet. And then drags you to the bathroom, where he rids both of you of your underwear. The man enters the shower, extending his hand to you, and you grab it by instinct, before being pulled right under the stream of steamy water. “‘Tsumu, I’m gonna look like a panda!” “Eh? But pandas are cute tho?” “I’d rather look hot right now” He laughs boyishly, almost innocently, as he pumps some of his face wash and rubs it gently all over your features. His calloused fingertips massage your forehead and temples, while thumbs work on your chin and nose. It fills you with millions of bubbles, cotton candy surrounding your heart as fluffy as the foam. “‘Tsumu?” “Mmm?” “Kiss me.” And he does. At first it’s slow and sweet, but as your hands wash away the evening from the skin, there’s more hunger, more passion. Atsumu pulls and lifts you, throwing you over his shoulder as he walks out of the bathroom. “‘Tsumuuuu! The towels! We’re NOT sleeping in a wet bed!” “Who said anything about sleepin’, princess?”

Idiot.

Bonus scene: “Good morning sunshine.”

He whispers against your forehead after your lashes tickle his neck. His palms embrace your cheeks, and his lips on yours are as soft as summer rain. Pecks become open mouthed kisses, invitations and promises of summer heat. Breaths and sighs remind you of a seaside breeze, carrying the freshness of waves and hotness of sand. Your hands are roaming in search of a buried treasure, but no matter how much they find, it’s not enough. It’s never enough. His mouth ghost over the shells of your ears, spilling words smooth and shiny like pearls, while fingers trail new paths under the veil of your shirt. They discover new lands, gliding along the skin, making it bloom in tiny goosebumps wherever they touch. Kisses and licks flow at the surface of your neck, sealing and sucking over sensitive spots, painting them in pinks, reds, and purples. Big palms cover the hills of your breasts, thumbs sweep over the nipples so gently, that you’re not even sure if you imagined it.

Your naked body shivers underneath his, and arches into his warm embrace, as his lips press silent praises into your skin. You open your eyes, and you don’t know which is brighter - the sunshine pouring through the windows, or the sunshine of his hair. You can touch his hair though. So you do, and the soft rivers of gold cascade and tickle in between your fingers. Atsumu raises his gaze and smiles against your skin, lighting up your heart.

Reaching your heat, he pulls the strings of your pleasure with each kiss, each flick of his tongue, and you sing the ballad he composes. In this concert you’re the star, you’re the diva, and he’s merely there to worship you, to accompany your voice, to encourage and appreciate. He’s guiding you through the quiet breathy parts, not much louder than a whisper. He’s caressing the keys, adding more passion, more force, more depth, eliciting notes reaching higher, pushing you through a crescendo, rapidly, lovingly, until you’re nothing but an effusion of pleads and cries of his name.

“Atsumu, come back to me.” You breathe out.

And he’s walking the path again, kissing the ground he steps on, coming back to where he belongs, where he wants to belong. Your eyes meet when he glides into you, slowly, carefully, as if any sharp movement would shatter you and this moment. Atsumu nibbles at your lips and you let him in, let his tongue dance with yours, as your fingers intertwine.

One more push joins your hips, and you both let out a breathy sigh. He pulls back and rolls back in, making sure you feel all the veins, until his tip kisses your cervix. And again. And once more.

“Ah… Tsumu…” And he knows he’s lost.

“God, yer so beautiful.”

You’re sinking in his eyes like molten chocolate, and the whole world ceases to exist. There’s only you and him, and the flame spilling from where you’re joined, overtaking your bodies, minds, and senses. It’s too much, it wells up in your eyes and overspills, and he’s quick to brush it away. A kiss is placed on your temple and travels down your cheek and onto your neck. With a free hand you rub mindless patterns on his back, scrape at his nape, while his roams down along your skin, adorning all the curves.

You moan into his shoulder at the sudden touch. He only grazes your clit and you’re fluttering, pulling him deeper inside of you. The movement is slow, as slow as the roll of his hips, as the drag of his tongue on your throat. But it spreads like a wildfire, floods your mind in waves until everything is drowned in a white haze and explodes in a million stars.

“Come with me”

And he does. He paints his own milky way inside of you, releasing galaxies upon galaxies until he pours everything he has, until he’s empty and you’re full. He does, because he would follow you anywhere.

[hyenahunt]

Beast Survival - 1

Writer: Nishioka Maiko

Season: Summer

Proofreading: royalquintet (JP & ENG)

Jun: Wha— They're asking me to play the leading role? Umm, why me...?

[Location: Training Room]

Jun: (Woah. I totally zoned out while working out, and now my shirt's soaked with sweat. Feels real gross...) (I should change outta it soon..... But even then, this is the second one I've gone through.) (Did I bring any other spares...?) ( — Ooh, looks like I've got one left. So this is a case of "preparation is prevention", huh. Serious props to the past me for this.) (Heading all the way to the changing room's a pain, so I might as well just change here. There's no one else around, after all.) (Ahh~ Nothing beats changing into a new shirt right after sweatin' up a storm.) (I'm all refreshed in both body and soul now.... is what I wanna say, but it's not that easy...) (Recently things've been so dreary no matter what I do, and even working out like this doesn't do anything to clear up the feeling.) (It feels just like the post-workout burn, like my limbs are made outta lead or something.) (Isn't there usually a link between being active and feeling refreshed? Or well, it depends on how much working out you do, I think.) (The training I had to do as a kid was so rough that I couldn't even eat sometimes, after all.) (Rather than refreshing... It was more like defreshing.) (Well, it's thanks to that my physical stamina and strength's basically on par with actual athletes now, but I still think of it as an unfortunate product of my past.) (.....Hm, what's this? Someone's poked their head in from the entrance... looks like it's — ) Heya, Anzu-san, what's up~ What're you doing all the way in the gym? I'm the only one here, y'know~? — Huh? Ohh, so that's it. You need me for something, huh. Hm? I don't seem to be doing so well? Is that how it looks? Well, it's true I haven't been feeling too my best, but... Ahh, nah, it's not physical or anything. I can still work out like this, as you can see. It's just... moodwise, I haven't been feeling too hot, or I've been feeling kinda gloomy, actually. So it's been kinda throwing my daily routine outta whack, I guess? What's that? Ah, well, if I had to give a reason... It really isn't that big a deal, seriously. I mean, Ohii-san's moved outta the Reimei dorms and into ES's, right? Up 'til now, that guy would make me pour all his tea, carry all his shit, and show him all around... He's a complete asshole who'd dump it all on me when it came to pretty much everything. Unfortunately, I got completely used to it. And now my current roommate's the prim-and-proper type who takes care of his own stuff himself. So ever since Ohii-san headed off, I've gotten fewer chances to take care of things and it's been messing with my motivation and stuff. Kinda like something's missing. Really now...? You're asking if I'm lonely? Goddamn. It's nothing like that, alright. Even in a part-time job you'd feel better being kept busy, right? It's more agonising when you have nothing to do. Killing too much time can kill you instead, after all. That's what I'm feeling right now. You wonder about that, do you? Keep making fun of me and I'm not gonna let you off, alright~? In any case, did you come looking for me just to shoot the breeze? You should be plenty satisfied now, then. I'm off, see ya. — Woah—!? Don't drag me back so forcefully, please. You're gonna stretch out my shirt, y'know. Alright, alright, I get it. You really do need me for something, huh? Well, what d'ya need me for~? Mm? What's this? A project proposal? Ohh, so it's a proposal for a stageplay... Ah~, sorry. I'm not really familiar with stuff in that field. Hmm. So the director of the play's really all that famous? — And what about it? Why're you giving this proposal to me? Wha— They're asking me to play the leading role? Umm, why me...? Mmm, well, it's not that I'm unhappy about it or anything.... I really appreciate them nominating me for the role, actually. It's just that I don't really know anything about theater, so it's a given I'd wonder why, yeah? Ahh. So the director came to see both Summer Live and SS last year, and became a fan of me? Is that so~ That makes me real happy ♪ But all the same... why? Ahh, please excuse me for being so skeptical. You could say it's just in my nature, or more like... Feeling like I can't trust anyone but myself is just something that's carried over from my life at school. I can't help but think that if some juicy offer sounds too good to be true, it probably isn't. I mean, think about it. We lost as Eden that time, after all. Not to mention the agency's unprecedented scandal completely blew up, and thanks to that I feel like there's no way our live could've won anyone's heart. Well, I'm pretty glad for it, honestly. We broke past all those various disappointments and still managed to pull off an awesome performance — it felt really great. But I'm sure anyone watching wouldn't have felt the same way. That's not the case, you say? Ahh, geez. You're... way too soft, is how I'd put it, I guess... Huh. So we caught this director's interest even despite the whole incident...? Well, they definitely sound like the eccentric type~ But y'know, if you're the one saying this I'm sure you're not being two-faced about it or anything, so I'll be good too and properly hear you out. Thank you very much. Huh!? Me starring in this stageplay would make it better than all the rest...? And they think I'm the number one best choice for the role.... Why are they going that far? They even said that since I can use my past experiences to bring the role to life, there's no one else who could play it?

Jun: T-this is the first time I've gotten such a passionate job offer... ... Well, it's not like it feels bad to hear the extent of their praise. I get it. I've never performed in a play before, so I'm not sure just how much I can do, but I'll go at it with all my heart and soul! ? What are you so happy for? You're not the one performing. Wha—? The script's actually done already!? And on top of that, it was written with me in mind...!? They didn't even know if I'd accept the role or not. Talk about jumping the gun... And they would've done anything to get me to accept, huh... That's actually a lil' scary, y'know. Well, since I said I'd do it I'm not gonna back out or anything, so please don't worry. There's still time to get introduced and have a quick run-through of the script. Ahh, yeah, I gotcha. I'm gonna be sure to read it from front to back. Alright, I'll start now, then~ Let's see — the title's "King of the Grasslands"? Pretty grand title, that. My role's... uhh, you said i'm playing the lead role, so... — Wait, whaaat the actual hell is this!?

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✦ all ✦ next →

[mcu-fan-fics-blog]

The Helping Hand

Summary: Y/N Krast Illegitimate Daughter of Tony Stark. Product of an unwanted teen pregnancy. What would Howard Stark be capable of doing to assure his sons future? What will happen when Tony meets our Beautiful, young, genius, rich philanthropist.

Word Count: 3000 approx

A/N: Sorry for the wait I've been a little busy the last couple of weeks. I hope you enjoy this chapter. Next chapter will be Civil war I hope to upload again soon. In the mean time if you have some ideas or thoughts send them my way.

Tw: Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Drug use, Drug addiction, Teen Pregnancy. (If there are any I missed please tell me.)

Ch.7

Chapter 8: Time and Irony Walk Hand in Hand

Ch.9

"Well this is nice…" You say as Natasha drags you along. You see currently you and Natasha are quote on quote shaking a tail. Whatever that means… "Shut up and keep moving." You stop moving and pull your arm away. "Stop Nat we've gone far enough. It was probably just a coincidence we didn't really get that far from the food truck." Finally taking the time to catch your breath. "I think we should get back to the compound. Tony and Bruce must be waiting for me." You say looking around for a cab lucky for you one stopped right before you and you got in.

The ride back to the Compound was quiet. When she's about to make her way in, you stop her. "Nat… I know that didn't go the way either of us wanted it to go but I still had fun. And again what I'm trying to say is that I would like to do things your way, candlelit, waiters, and wine. If you want to of course." You fidget with your fingers waiting for her response. "Y/n I would love to… but I like the way you do things. You're not the Wine and Dine type... I like that." She mentions as she walks back in. You quickly follow suit after she makes a comment about your blatant staring.

Once you stop on the elevator FRIDAY greets you. Telling you that Tony and Bruce are waiting for you in the lab. "Well Nat this is goodbye for now, see you around." You say stepping off of the elevator. Suddenly this weight comes crashing down on you. Remembering what Bruce told you the worry in his eyes. Dread fills your body when you're walking towards the lab. "Guys I'm back… anything good for me?" You state casually trying your hardest not to sound hopeful. "Well yes and no…" Tony states putting the tablet down. "I'm going to be honest with you… your heart is trashed, absolute garbage."

"Way to make a girl feel special." You say with a dry laugh. "But I think we can build something. And with my arc reactor technology we can make it work." He states tapping at his chest. This is where Bruce jumps in "with the help of Dr. Cho we could try and make a new cradle… and use it for its intended purpose this time around. Making a heart powered by the arc reactor." You nod taking all the information in. "Well this is good right? How long would this take." This is where both Tony and Bruce go quiet. "Y/n the process is relatively easy, what's difficult is getting our hands on the Vibranium."

"Which is basically a non existent problem at this point… Bruce is just paranoid, my contact will pan out you'll see." Tony jumps back in clearly annoyed that Bruce was disclosing such trivial issues. "Even if we do get the Vibranium Y/n there's something we don't know… If you'll even survive the transplant." Your eyes meet his and he elaborates. "Your body might not be strong enough to handle it." Suddenly the inevitability of the situation dawns upon you. "Well I'm still doing it… I'm dying anyways. What difference does it make if it's a month from now or five. I'm doing it." 

"Well, let not be hasty alright. We can still look for other alternatives." Bruce tries to argue. "Look, this is Y/n's decision. She's old enough to make her own decisions. Plus the more we work on this the higher survival chances are." Tony argues. You clear your throat when you notice some visitors standing by the door. "How long have they been there?" You ask, trying to mask your anger. Pietro and Steve both give you sheepish smiles that don't quite reach their eyes. "Look Y/n we just wanted to make sure you were okay… and by the looks of it you're not." 

You stand making your way to stand in front of Steve who had just taken a defensive stance. "Well you're right I'm not okay. Now what are you going to do about it Cap… Other than feeling pity every time you look at me." You say pushing your finger on his chest. "This does not leave this room you understand?" You say looking at both Steve and Pietro. "But, My sister…" You nod "Figure it out pretty boy. Now if you could leave the adults have to talk." They both sigh but take their leave. You turn and notice Tony and Bruce staring, not saying anything. You can only laugh at the sight. 

As much as you did want to be mad you couldn't. You were starting to come to terms with the fact that your business was now becoming their business. "I just wanted to watch them squirm." You clarify making Tony laugh. "Well I'd say you achieved that." Bruce mentions. "I'll give them til the end of the day. What do you think?" You say looking at Tony. "How much are you willing to bet, Billionaire to Billionaire?" He asks, challenging you. "50 million dollars." He scoffs. "Don't be a prude, make it Euros." You nod. "Best money there is." You say agreeing with him. "I'll hold you to that Y/n." He says as you leave the lab.

Two days later you were busy. You'd been in contact with Bruce and Pepper. Currently you were looking for someone to mentor. Someone you could leave your legacy with. Logan was an obvious choice but you knew he wouldn't take it. "You wanna give it a break Y/n you're not going to find the perfect candidate in so little time." Logan mentions. When suddenly your secretary enters with more forms. "Ms. Krast these are the applications from Midtown Science High. There's only four. Liz Allan, Ned Leeds, Flash Thompson, and uhh Peter Parker." You sigh with a smile forming on your lips. "They've got to be here my mentee. These kids are geniuses." 

You say as you look through the applications. Slowly crossing off the first two, that Flash kid and Liz. Ned and Peter it was a tough choice until you saw some of yourself in Peter's eyes. "It's him." You say under your breath catching Logan's attention. "Peter Parker… I want him, he will be the future of our company. Make arrangements. I want him to feel welcomed." You say as you start to gather your things. "Send out the acceptance letter today." You say to Logan on your way out. "Will do Boss." He says with a smile growing on his face as he reads the file. Peter didn't have it easy on the contrary he lived through a lot but he still managed to be him.

The next week went by in a blur. Your will and testament were drafted and certified. You were set on that end and now on the other front. You were currently parked outside Midtown High waiting for the bell to ring. When it does a couple of minutes pass when a fresh faced kid is knocking on your window. "Y/n Krast nice to meet you kid." You say rolling down the window. He seems a little nervous. "Come on in Peter. We're going to get to know each other a little before we begin working with the internship." He nods enthusiastically, a small smile forming on his lips. "Tell me about your Peter, I mean outside of what I already know."

"Well I'm what most people would call a nerd. My aunt may always say that's not true but it is." You hum in agreement pulling out of the school parking lot. "Well being popular is overrated anyways." You jump in. "And Ned, my best friend, we're huge fans of you and your work." He says his speed increases as he starts to ramble about how he followed your trajectory as soon as he found out who you were. "Well I'm glad you like what I do Peter but in my eyes were equals. I will teach you my ways and hopefully you'll take over once I'm dead. Keeping my legacy alive long after I'm dead." You say seriously making him settle and quiet down. 

"Ms. Krast you can't be serious." He says giving you an incredulous look. "I was an orphan… I was given a chance. Someone believed in me. I guess what I'm trying to say is that you remind me of me… and I would like to give you that same chance that I was given." You say sincerely. "Y/n that's too generous… Plus I don't think that I'm what you're looking for. I'm clumsy and…" You stop the car making him look at you. "You may not be ready now or tomorrow but if you let me teach you, you will be." You say reassuringly. "Plus I don't plan on dying anytime soon." You say playfully at the end causing Peter to laugh successfully lightening the mood. "Also another plus for you after this year's audit we'll be working hand in hand with Tony Stark."

At the mention of Tony's name he lit up ten times more than you thought possible. It made you laugh a little but you understood him. "That's amazing. Me working for Y/n Krast and Tony Stark, a literal dream come true." You nod at his statement. The day went by incredibly fast. He was a nice kid, respectful and smart, a little naïve but overall sensible. You went to his favorite pizza place and talked, went to Krast Industries and introduced him to Logan. Showed him his dedicated work space. "So here's your badge, don't lose it. Umm… you'll be here every other day after school, and if you have some special dates tell Margaret the secretary and she'll make a schedule around it." You say as you're walking towards the elevator. 

Peter stops abruptly turning to face you. "Thank you really." He then proceeds to rather hastily pull you into a hug. You're shocked initially but hug him back nonetheless. "Don't sweat it kid." You say patting his back. "I'll have one of my drivers give you a lift home alright." He nods. Just before you press the button for the elevator the doors open. Revealing Pepper Potts and Tony Stark. It makes you laugh internally knowing that the young boy beside you just had his world rocked. "Ms. Krast this is real right?" He asks in a high pitched voice. You nod.

"Pepper Tony, I would like you to meet my new mentee Peter Parker." You say nudging him forward. "Hi, you're Tony Stark." He says in a daze. "Yes kid I am Tony stark and you are?" Tony could literally not care less. Until you gave Pepper a look and she nudged Tony. "Alright kid it was nice meeting you." He says overly enthusiastically. Peter takes the compliment either way. "Alright Peter go over to Margaret she'll take you to the driver. We have some urgent business to attend." He nods and waves goodbye shyly and takes his leave. "Right what do you guys need." Pepper clears her throat "Well actually Tony and I wanted to invite you out to lunch." 

"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's get going." You say walking off with Pepper. "You'll be pleased to know that you won our wager. They know..." Tony mentions at the restaurant. You laugh. "Told you!" Pepper gives you a look. "They're worried about you." You sigh. "Pepper, believe me I'm worried too." Tony quickly steps in. "Which you don't need to worry about too much, everything is in place. Everything panned out Dr. Cho was more than willing to help us. So whenever you want." He says again not meeting your gaze. "I was… ummm. Actually thinking we should hold off on that." 

"What… why?" They both ask almost immediately. "I'm okay right now." Tony scoffs. "So you rather wait till you have another episode to undergo the procedure." You hum. "Precisely see you get it." Watching their confusion you continue. "I've got things I have to leave ready. Time that I can't take for granted." Before they could argue with you said. "I need time… I-i drafted my will a couple of days ago." You say burying your head into your hands. "It's funny really… how you get things you're willing to live for. And life just comes along and takes it from you." Your mind drifts off to Viv and David. You wipe your tears and excuse yourself. Just as you're about to leave you remember. 

"Put the money in a college fund for the kid." You grab Peppers shoulder and nod. "We'll keep in touch." You say leaving the restaurant.  

Three weeks later 

Pretty early on you noticed Peter's jumpy behavior. It wasn't long till you found out his little secret. Again smart kid heart of gold even, but too naïve for his own good. You'd had one of your AI robots track him after he'd shown up a little dinged up. Telling him you knew took some time. You didn't know the extent of his capabilities, but you'd seen the kid walk on walls and kick some ass.

As cute as he looked in that makeshift costume you had a better one in mind. "Peter I would like to show you something." You call out from your workstation in the lab. "Ward pull up spider schematics please." You call out. "What do you think?" You say as Peter glances at his new suit. "I-i um… It's awesome but who is at for?" He said quickly. You almost burst out in laughter right then and there but you played along. "Well I was in Queens the other day and there was this mugging and some hero came out of nowhere and stopped the mugging." You say as you deconstruct the specks of the suit. Watching as peter gawks at the hologram. 

"When I noticed his suit wasn't really a suit, I made him one. You think he'll like it?" Peter nods eagerly, you hum in response. "Alright then try it on, see how it fits spider boy." Peter stands there with his mouth hanging open and you could swear saliva came out. "You aren't that good at keeping secrets kid." You say handing him the suit. "I expect you to be careful, kid." Peter starts to ramble trying to explain himself and begs you to not fire him. You physically had to stop him from pacing. "No ones firing anyone. I'm proud of your kid again, just be careful." Emphasizing the last part. "I will" after all that's out of the way you and Peter spent the day testing out the specks in his new suit. Web slingers and all. Yo I didn't leave until he got the hang of it. It took a while but it was well with the wait. 

The next day you wake up to the news seeing a familiar twin on the news. Not good Lagos had gone wrong, the building collapsed and Wanda was to 'blame'. You hurriedly made your way through your morning routine and raced to the compound. As soon as you make it to the common room you can tell something's off. "How is everybody?" You asked Steve who was the first you saw. "I'm assuming you heard about the incident." You don't have the heart to say yes so you just nod. "We're all a little down on morale. Nothing we can't fix." You say, giving you a small smile. You hate that he is down playing this because of your current dilemma. "It wasn't your fault." You say. As you walk off towards Pietro. 

"Are you okay?" You ask this time actually worried Pietro doesn't seem like his usual self. "No...It's Wanda. She hasn't talked to anyone she hasn't eaten she hasn't left her room." He says all in one breath. He finally stopped stirring and slid down to the floor and sat. "Its my fault. I-i could've moved faster, I could've saved them." He says defeatedly. "Maybe… Maybe not" You say bluntly sitting in front of him. "You can't go back now. And I know it's a sour experience. You made the right decision." You sigh. "You made the choice that saved the most lives." He nods letting out a deep breath. "I know… I know but Wanda. If I had saved those people Wanda wouldn't be feeling like this right now." You shake your head. "You fail to realize that if you had done that you would've died along with the other victims. Wanda will come around and let me talk to her." He only nods. "She's in her room."

You knock on her door a couple of times… no answer. So you make yourself comfortable and prepare yourself. Your knock every minute or two and you're constantly yelling in your head. Half an hour goes by and nothing. You go back to mentally yelling, when suddenly you're being dragged by the collar of your shirt into the room with the doors shutting behind you. "You're stubborn like a mule." She says not sparring you a look. "Yeah well I'm dying what are you gonna do about it." You quipped smiling at her. She chuckles. Suddenly the light leaves her face. "I killed people… I put people in danger, I put my own brother I'm danger." You nod. "You also saved hundreds of people. God only knows what that gas would have done. So thank you Wanda. You're my hero." You say sending her a smile.

Right when she's about to say something a certain red friend phases through the wall. "You will never cease to amaze me Vision." You say while looking between him and the wall. "You have very good taste in clothes." You mention as you eye him. He smiles. "Vision. We talked about this, there's a door for a reason." Wanda states. "Yes, well the door was open so I assumed…" He says, explaining himself. "What did you need Vision?" Wanda asks cutting him off. "Well Mr. Stark asked me to come and get both you there is a team meeting. With secretary Ross." 

[olympiansally]

I often think about how in ep 26 Light is just silent and alone. I wonder what he was thinking?? I like to think that he mourned for L and regretted killing him but he pushes all of these thoughts deep down. I just want to hear light go "fuck maybe I shouldn't have killed that bastard- WAIT NO WHAT ARE YOU THINKING STOP THIS IS PERFECT EVERYTHING IS PERFECT"

Hmmmm ok so i do have thoughts lmao

This is actually a very cool topic for me because it goes into Light’s emotional complexities which are great and i can talk about for days lmao

And like basically, I agree, but I agree with lots of thought that might not all be coherent and I went into them deep so beware LMAO

So like, even thought Light is very straight forward with his morality and tends to know what he wants in terms of goals and such, I tend to think that Light doesn’t quite grasp the depth of his feelings most of the time. Partially, that has to do with him dismissing feelings as something that’s bellow him, going as far as to say that “that’s how idiot happen”. So a lot of the time, Light either just goes with the first emotion he senses in him and tries to “fix it” so he doesn’t feel anymore or just tries to ignore them all completely.

This instance you’re talking about fits mostly into the first category I think and we see him basically focus all his energy on a single emotion so he doesn’t feel the rest. So, you might not like it, but I actually don’t think Light was mourning L then. Not yet anyway.

The way Light tends to function with feeling isn’t all that smooth, so when L dies and he starts feeling A LOT, Light just grabs onto something he feels enough of to quiet all the rest, but also not so much that he wouldn’t be able to handle and then hyper focusses on fixing that one emotion he’s now feeling. Which is why I don’t think Light was grieving yet, I doubt he would have allowed himself to even acknowledge that he was feeling any type of grieve or sorrow over L being death right away. I mean, that’s a boy who has to be hit over the head repeatedly with his feelings before he relents and faces them. So in this first moment he has to choose something else to focus on and there’s an emotion that I think he would accept and that is close enough to actual grief that he’d be able to channel all his sorrow into it and try to deal, and that’s LOSS.

So now you’re probably like uhh Lu, isn’t loss pretty much just grief tho??

To which I answer kinda, but also no, making it PERFECT for Light at that moment. He absolutely feels the loss of having killed L (he’ll eventually even grow to regret it, but not yet). But loss isn’t necessarily in the realm of grief and here is where Light pretty much just manipulates himself into feeling AT A LOSS rather then feeling WHAT he lost. And that is a feeing he can totally handle. Up til then he’d directed all his energy towards L, towards their game, towards beating him. So now that that’s done he has no idea what to do next. He is lost as in, without direction in those first moments after L dies, so we have Light wandering around without purpose or motivation because he has no idea what to do next now that L’s gone. In truth I don’t even think Light thought he’d get that far, he probably didn’t think he’d get to kill L (which is another topic that i also have loads to talk about but i’ll refrain or this reply won’t ever end jsjwjajsjsk).

In a way, he mirrors L’s own behavior after he had to accept that Light wasn’t Kira (even thought like, he is) and has to let him out of detainment.

Obviously there’s going to be some lawlight here because, well, I can’t help it lmao. But I think it’s VERY telling and of huge narrative significance how completely aimless they both get when they’re disappointed in each other. It just shows how completely they depend on one another to drive them, to give them purpose.

L gets depressed (as he puts it) when he thinks Light isn’t Kira and therefore isn’t the worthy opponent, the equal, he had thought he was. Similarly, Light gets utterly lost when L dies because he feels like L disappointed him, he was supposed to keep challenging him, but now he’s gone. They both loose all motivation when they feel like the other won’t be able to challenge them anymore and while Light eventually gets L back in the game during the Yotsuba arc, L is now dead and can’t bring back Light’s motivation. So Light desperately looks for something else to motivate him and goes into that whole “perfect world” spiral moment.

At the same time, I think when L died Light just felt A LOT in a way he couldn’t deal with. Not only are there MANY emotions, but they are highly conflicting ones. That is actually very well represented in L’s death scene, as Light jumps to catch him and cradles his body as he dies, but also shifts into that creepy grin as the feeling of victory takes over.

Since Light doesn’t know how to deal with ALL THAT he basically distracts himself with finding new purpose and with building his new world and shelfs his feelings so he can deal with them when he’s ready (and uh he never will be)

I also think that from a more subconscious perspective Light gets that desperate to start seeing his new world and rushes to make it happen because that’s how he deals with the fact the HE killed L. It’s his end that justify the means and he need it badly. The perfect world has to happen because there needs to be a reason, killing L needs to have been worth it (and eventually part of the reason he spirals is because he realises it just wasn’t worth it, from a more ship centric perspective). He sacrificed his only true friend, his equal (his soulmate jskwka) to achieve this goal so it NEEDS to be worth it and to be perfect.

So like that’s how i interpret Light’s actions right after L dies. I think in time the bottled up emotions definitely start to spill over and he starts facing what he did but that takes quite some time. I truly think Light would try to avoid feeling for as long as he possibly could and that he just pours himself into building the new world work at first. But the more he works on it, the more he realizes that he wanted L to see it too, wanted the only person who understood him to also understand WHY he was doing all he did. And the more he realizes he can’t have that, that L will never see it, that he’ll never know and that he’s actually GONE, the more Light himself starts to slip and take risks until he eventually loses. Because the truth is that Light refuses to grief L so bad that he becomes haunted by his memory and weighted by guilt.

So no, I don’t think that Light was mourning and regretting in episode 26, but he absolutely SHOULD have been. To me, personally, the fact that he refuses to and suppresses his feelings is what eventually puts him in the state of mind that makes him lose, because his attempts at winning become desperate. It stops being that he wants to win and it starts being about how he has to, how he feels that if he fails, then he killed L for nothing, which he absolutely cannot face. I think he only truly starts to mourn L and to regret killing him once he starts getting bored and lonely, when he notices that building his new world without L to oppose him feels more like a chore then the excitement he had with L and in the end he truly regrets because he understands that without L it just isn’t worth it. So like, in a way, his refusal to mourn L is what makes him unhinged enough to make mistakes and lose.

Oooff that was a lot kajwkajwja

But like you made me THINK so there it is

I also wanted to say that I love the way this fandom does asks, i mean these comments that get us rambling and analyzing things in length are very much awesome, so thanks!!!

If you can’t tell I had a lot of fun rambling about these boys so feel free to ask more stuff anytime 🥰

[seanfalco]

My Girl | Nathan Young x Reader

Fandom: Misfits Pairing: Nathan x Reader Word Count: 1629 Rating: T Prompt: I called you at 2am because I need you Requested by: @gurlimtired​ a/n: I noticed that some of my drabbles that I posted as asks weren’t showing up in the tag, so I figured I’d try this.  Thank you for the request!  I really ended up enjoying this one :3

——

Feet dangling  over the side of the balcony, Nathan rested his chin on his arm as he leaned forward against the railing, looking over the dark Community Center.  With a heavy sigh he reached for his phone once again, checking the time as his screen lit up.  It was nearly 2:00 and he was nowhere near tired.  Oh, he’d tried to sleep, but after an hour of rolling about his mattress restlessly, he gave up.

This was the third time in twenty minutes he’d nearly dialed your number, backing out at the last minute.  She’s probably hanging out with her bandmates, or sleepin’, or --

He sighed again, jumping when his phone lit up in his hand, your name filling the screen and the obnoxious ringtone echoing loudly in the empty room.  “Ahh!” he cried, juggling the vibrating phone, almost dropping it over the ledge.

“[Y/N], what’s up?” he answered as suavely as possible, not wanting you to know how glad he was that you’d called.

“Nathan? Oh, thank God,” you answered and he didn’t fail to notice the way your voice trembled slightly on the other end of the line.

“[Y/N], are you… okay?  It’s almost two and --”

“Uhm, not… not really?” you answered, huffing a nervous laugh.  “There’s this guy who’s been harassing me at work, like he keeps tryin’ to get my number and shit, and uh… he’s outside right now.  He’s been waitin’ for me to get off.  I thought he’d given up and gone away, but he’s still out there and I’m - I don’t really wanna walk home alone.”

Before he knew it Nathan was on his feet, rooting around for his discarded clothes.  “Where are you right now?” he asked, barely concealed alarm in his voice, though he was past caring if you noticed or not -- the only thing he could think of was getting to you before that creeper tried anything sketchy.

“I’m still at work.  I told my manager I was gunna wait around til someone could walk with me.”

“Alright.  Stay there, okay?  I’m comin’ to get you.”

As soon as he hung up he finished dressing and shoved his feet into his shoes before slipping out of the Community Center and hurrying to the tiny convenience store you worked at, not far away.  When he got to the store he saw you through the window, waiting by the counter, chatting with your coworker.  Tossing his spent cigarette to the curb he crushed it under his sneaker, glancing around nonchalantly, lookin’ for the bloke that was giving you a hard time.  

Catching sight of a shady lookin’ fellow waitin’ round the corner, he figured that was the guy, quickly ducking his curly head before the bloke noticed him staring and pushed through the door into the bright fluorescent flooded interior.

——

As soon as Nathan entered, relief flooded you at the sight of him and you waved, letting your friend know you were leaving and hurried over to him.  “Nathan!  Thank you!  Thank you, thank you, thank you,” you exclaimed, grateful that he’d come right away.  “I hope I didn’t wake you.”

“Nah, I was still up,” he assured you with a shrug.  “So, that guy round the corner,” he continued, pointing back over his shoulder with his thumb, “that the guy that’s been harassin’ ya?”

“Yeah, that’s him,” you replied, shoving your hands in your jacket pockets.

“How long’s this been goin’ oh, huh?”

“A couple of weeks,” you answered reluctantly, not quite meeting his eye.

“Why didn’t yeh say anythin’ sooner?” he asked, his voice surprisingly somber and you shrugged.

“Didn’t think it was a big deal.  I thought he’d get tired of it and leave me alone, but…” you trailed off with a sigh.  “He’s never waited around for me like this before.”

Nathan frowned, wrapping an arm protectively around your shoulder as he ushered you toward the door.  “Well, I’m gunna have a little talkin’ to with the git,” he announced, and you raised an eyebrow at him.  “I’ll be polite, yeah?” he exclaimed, a touch defensively, though you didn’t believe it for a second.

As soon as you walked out the door, the guy pushed off the wall where he’d been waiting, his expression darkening when he saw Nathan’s arm around you.

“Hey you!” Nathan called, drawing himself up straighter, smirking at the fact that he was nearly a whole foot taller than the other guy.

“Who me?” he asked.

“Yeah, you, y’prick,” Nathan scoffed.  “I hear you’ve been messin’ with my girl.”

At his words your brows rose in surprise and you ducked your head, trying to fight back the grin that was threatening to steal across your face.

“Your girl?” the guy spat, incredulity painting his face.  “She ain’t never mentioned--”

“Yeah, that’s right,” Nathan cut in, “my girl, and I don’t appreciate you harassin’ her.  She don’t appreciate it, nobody appreciates it.  So why don’t you take the hint and scamper off like a good boy, eh?  And don’t show your ugly mug round here again!  You probably have a tiny dick too,” he threw in there for good measure.

Once he’d finished his little tirade, which you had to admit was rather sweet, in his own way, he stared the bloke down, raising his thick eyebrows as if just daring him to try anything.

“Yeah?  And whatcha gunna do bout it, huh?” the guy shot back, not stepping down.  “You don’t look so tough, y’gangly git.”

Nathan’s eyes narrowed, his grip around your shoulder tightening before he was pushing you behind him and stepping in front of you defensively.

“Oh, I’m tough.  I’m real tough.  Come at me, bro!” he exclaimed raising his fists as if he were actually gunna fight the fellow.

“Nathan!” you hissed in alarm -- this wasn’t what you’d had in mind when you’d asked him to walk you home.

Glancing over his shoulder at you, he flashed what he probably assumed to be a reassuring grin.  “Don’t worry [Y/N], m’love, I can take ‘im!”

Rolling your eyes, you crossed your arms over your chest.  “If you end up dyin’, I’m gunna kick your fuckin’ arse!”

If anything, that didn’t seem to deter him, his grin only growing as he waggled his eyebrows at you.  The guy across from him looked taken aback for a moment, no doubt confused by your exclamation, but soon he had his fists raised as well, advancing on Nathan before throwing a right hook, catching him right on the jaw.

Nathan gasped, touching his cheek gingerly.  “That was just a lucky shot, mate.  C’mon!”  Again the other guy’s fist made contact and you winced, not sure how much longer you could stand watching Nathan get beat up for you.

Spitting blood, Nathan wiped the rest of it from his chin with the back of his hand, this time managing to get a shot in himself, mouthing ‘ow’ as he shook his hand.  While the bloke was dazed, Nathan managed to tackle him, crashing to the pavement atop him before scrambling to hold him down, throwing punches til the guy surrendered.

“Alright, alright, I give up, jeeze!” he cried, holding up his hands.  “You can have ‘er, she ain’t worth it.”

Nathan frowned, grabbing his lapels and lifting him so their faces were inches apart, no trace of amusement in his expression.  “To you, maybe,” he hissed under his breath, dropping the guy as he got to his feet, a trifle unsteadily and you rushed to his side, catching him before he tripped, letting him lean on you.

“Did you call me your girl?” you asked, glancing over at him as you walked, a small smile playing at your lips despite everything.

“Uhh… did I?” Nathan asked, feigning ignorance.  “I was in the zone, I can’t rightly remember.”

“You called me your girl,” you insisted, your grin growing at the conflicted look on Nathan’s face.

“Okay, yeah, maybe I did,” he admitted, “but it was in the heat of the moment, it was part of the charade,” he exclaimed.

“Uh huh,” you said with a smirk, stopping and turning to him, reaching up to jerk his face toward you for a better look.  “You’re gunna have one helluva shiner tomorrow,” you murmured, turning his face this way and that. 

“Yeah, well, it was worth it,” he murmured, his eyes darting away from yours.  “Besides, it’ll make me look tough.  The ladies love that kind of thing, right?” he asked, his usual bravado returning.

“D’you mean, do I like that kinda thing?” you asked, taking him off guard, watching his adam’s apple bob slowly as he swallowed. 

“Well… do ya?”

“Maybe, a little,” you murmured, and his eyebrows rose as he sucked in a breath, his eyes flicking to your lips.

“That’s… good t’know,” he said finally, and you smiled, unable to hold it back any longer.

“Did you do all this,” you gestured to his face and blood flecked shirt,” just to impress me?”

Glancing away he cleared his throat.  “Maybe.”

Gently turning his face back to you, you looked up at him.  “Next time, you don’t have to go to such lengths.  I already like you, Nathan, you don’t hafta… prove yourself in order t’get some sort of affection from me.”

He blinked, his mouth falling open, at a loss. 

Trailing your fingers from his jaw down to the zipper of his jacket, you balled the fabric in your fist, pulling him down to you.  “I was gunna kiss you either way, y’know,” you murmured before pulling him against you, your lips colliding and Nathan wasted no time pressing you back against the alley wall, his hand slipping round to cradle the back of your head as he kissed you back.

[daryl-dixon-daydreams]

Words: 6,765 Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader Reader pronouns: she/her Era: Alexandria Warnings: Language, coerced marriage, gore, violence, sexuality, typical TWD stuff (recommended NC17+) A/N: This part is LONG! This is part of a series! Find the previous parts on the Masterlist! Summary: Safe in Hilltop, Daryl worries about Y/N and rushes her to the doctor.

Your name: submit What is this?

Daryl looked desperately at Maggie. You were completely limp in his arms, your head lolled toward his chest. “Where’s the doctor here?” he asked.

“This way.” Maggie, Sasha, and Enid hurriedly led the way to the medical trailer. Daryl glanced down at your face as he walked. You seemed to be breathing okay, but you were extremely pale.

Dr. Carson spun around as Daryl busted inside. He immediately dropped the papers in his hand and rushed over as Daryl rested you down as gently as he could on one of the beds. “What happened?”

Daryl shrugged. “Dunno. She just went pale and then she was out.”

Dr. Carson grabbed your wrist and felt for your pulse, keeping his eyes on the second hand of his watch. “Her pulse is a little elevated.” He looked at Daryl as well as the concerned faces of Maggie, Sasha, and Enid gathered around on the other side of your bed. He grabbed a blood pressure cuff and returned to your side.

Daryl’s expression was overwhelmed with concern. He brushed your hair off your face and anxiously chewed on his bottom lip.

“Do we have any guesses?” Dr. Carson asked, watching the dial on the cuff. He noticed that Daryl looked like he needed some treatment, too…

Daryl paused thoughtfully for a moment. “We just came from The Sanctuary,” he said darkly. “Escaped. If I had to guess, I’d say she ain’t been eatin’ or sleepin’.” He ran a hand back through his dirty hair. “And, uhh… she’s—probably some… some trauma. I dunno about injuries.” He realized that it was entirely possible you had lied to him about not being hurt. He shifted his weight anxiously, avoiding everyone’s eyes, and grabbed one of your hands gently in his. It felt small, fragile. You’d always seemed to be made of such strong stuff, Kevlar. This wasn’t right.

Dr. Carson nodded stoically. “Alright. Could be in shock. Why don’t the rest of you wait outside briefly? Enid, help me get her changed into a gown and checked over. We’ll hang an IV and get her hydrated, get some nutrients in her. Hopefully all she needs is rest.”

Daryl was hesitant to release your hand and stared at Enid and Dr. Carson as they rushed into action. Maggie noticed his unwillingness to leave and touched him gently on the arm. “Daryl. Come on. Let’s just wait outside a minute.” He shifted his weight back and forth, still staring down at your closed eyes and pale face. “Dr. Carson will take care of her. She’s gonna be just fine, but they need room to work. C’mon.”

He gave your hand a gentle squeeze and reluctantly rested it back down on your stomach, allowing Sasha and Maggie to lead him outside. When the trailer door closed behind him with a snap he flinched, and he immediately sunk down on the steps, hanging his head in his hands, elbows propped on his knees.

Sasha put a gentle hand on his shoulder. He tensed. “She’s gonna be fine, Daryl. Dr. Carson is really good. She probably just needs some fluids and rest.”

He showed no sign of having heard her. All he could think about was how this was his fault.

About fifteen agonizing minutes later, the creak of the trailer door behind him sent Daryl rocketing to his feet. He looked up to see Enid in the doorway. She stepped out as Sasha and Maggie, also waiting nearby, rose to their feet too.

“Her blood pressure and heart rate have stabilized but she’s still out. Dr. Carson says she’ll probably just wake up when her body is ready to.”

Daryl was pacing in front of the steps now, rubbing a hand over his mouth and the stubble on his face. “Is she, uhh—Did ya check her over? Is she—she hurt somehow?” he asked desperately.

Enid shook her head. “Nothing that we could see or detect. Everything looks fine. She’s probably just in shock and dehydrated.”

Maggie stepped forward as Daryl froze in place again, staring down at his boots. His face was dark. “Daryl—what happened? How’d you get out?”

His hands clenched into fists and he shut his eyes. He felt like he could be sick. “She, uhh—” There was a quiver in his voice. “She came there to get me out. She—before Alexandria—she was a prisoner there and, uhh—” He was having a hard time getting the words out through his emotion, his face screwing up and his jaw clenching. He looked up and met Sasha’s eyes. “She was one of his ‘wives’,” Daryl growled. “She did it to save her brother. But when I got taken, she went back.” He began pacing again, pressing a hand over his face. “She went back to him, to Negan. She went back in so she could get me out.”

That was all he could get out. He collapsed again on the steps and immediately began anxiously chewing his thumbnail again.

The gravity of what Daryl had just said was settling over Maggie, Sasha, and Enid. Maggie collapsed back against the planter behind her. “Oh my God,” she uttered. “I had no idea.”

Daryl shook his head and shrugged. “She didn’t tell anyone. She didn’t want anyone to know.”

Rage flashed in Sasha’s eyes. “That sick son of a bitch. Did he do something to her?” she asked Daryl.

Daryl shook his head, refusing to look at anyone, turmoil churning in his chest, guilt crushing him so much he felt like he couldn’t take in air. “Depends on what ya mean by ‘somethin’,” he growled.

“Oh my God,” Maggie said again, pressing a hand over her mouth.

Enid lightly touched Daryl’s shoulder. “Dr. Carson wants to look you over. At least the gunshot wound.”

“’M fine,” he barked back.

“Probably. But just let us check,” she said gently.

Daryl hesitated for a moment, but finally conceded and stood. “Fine. But I’m sittin’ right beside her ‘til she wakes up.” Enid nodded and Daryl followed her back into the trailer.

Outside, Maggie and Sasha exchanged another distraught look.

“I didn’t know. About her brother. About Negan—any of it,” Sasha said. “Did you?”

Maggie shook her head. “No. But she was always really private. Never talked about her past. I can see why. How do you even begin to explain somethin’ like that to someone?”

“Until she talked about The Saviors that day, here, I never—but even then she didn’t say—"

Maggie shook her head. “Goin’ back. To him. To that? Knowing what he’d done to our people. What he was capable of. I can’t imagine…”

Sasha nodded, wide-eyed. “Yeah… I mean, I knew she was a badass. I’ve fought walkers beside her but—” She shook her head again, her lips parting in disbelief.

“She did it for Daryl,” Maggie said quietly, smoothing a hand over her belly. _ _ _ _ _ _

Sometime later, Maggie went back over to the medical trailer to see how you were doing. When she got inside, Dr. Carson was taking inventory of the drugs in the cabinet and he nodded toward the far corner in response to her questioning look.

When she rounded the curtain divider, she saw Daryl sitting at your bedside, leaning forward in a chair, anxiously chewing his thumbnail. His gaze was fixated on your face, but his blue eyes seemed unfocused.

Maggie stepped forward and lightly rested a hand on your arm. “How is she?”

Daryl shook his head almost imperceptibly and shrugged.

“Has she woken up at all?” Maggie asked him.

He shook his head again and straightened up in his chair. “Nah. Not yet.”

Maggie took in the worn and exhausted look on Daryl’s face, the bruises, the layers of dirt on his skin. “You should go get cleaned up. I’ll sit with her. Enid can show you where you can stay.”

He shook his head, leaning forward onto the edge of your bed with his elbows. “Nah. I ain’t goin’ anywhere.”

“She’ll be okay,” Maggie said, but knowing better than to try to persuade Daryl to leave. Nothing short of sheer force would have moved him. “Are you alright?”

He shrugged vaguely. “Doc says I’m okay.”

“Good. That’s good. But not exactly what I meant.” She waited, but he didn’t respond. “I’ll bring you some food.” She rested her hand gently on Daryl’s shoulder and felt him stiffen beneath her touch, but he hardly acknowledged it. Once Maggie had disappeared around the curtain, he reached out and grasped your hand in his again. It felt a little cold, and he rubbed it gently between his palms. And he waited.

_ _ _ _ _ _

Dr. Carson came to check on your vitals again around midnight and found Daryl slumped over on the edge of your bed, his head resting on his arms. He jumped awake the sound of the doctor’s footsteps.

“Sorry,” Dr. Carson said softly.

Daryl rubbed the sleep from his eyes and glanced at your face. He rested his hand on yours again. “How is she?” he asked, his voice a gruff rasp.

The doctor finished listening to your pulse and your lungs, and reached for the blood pressure cuff. “All her vitals are good,” he said. “She went through a traumatic experience?” he asked, a glance at Daryl’s expression.

His brow drew down low over his eyes and his face darkened. He nodded.

“Then her mind and body probably just need time to be turned off for a while. And if she wasn’t sleeping or eating, she needs to recover the things her body’s missing.” He checked the level of the IV drip bag. “That’s what this is for.”

“Ya didn’t find—anything physical? She wasn’t beat up or—?”

Dr. Carson shook his head. “No. Nothing like that. Nothing like what you went through.” He paused, but Daryl showed no sign that he was going to respond. “You went through trauma too. Physical and otherwise. You should also get some rest,” he said kindly. “I promise she’s in good hands here.”

Daryl nodded. “I know. I just—she’d be here for me. So. I’m gonna be here for her.”

_ _ _ _ _ _

Daryl awoke to the sound of tweeting birds outside the next morning and slowly lifted his head off his arms, which were resting on the edge of your bed. He rubbed at his tired eyes and glanced over at you. He shot upright, his chair clattering back and squeaking on the floor. Your eyes were open. He grabbed your hand and you gave it a squeeze.

“Y/N,” he said, leaning over you. “Doc!”

You looked tired and a little groggy but you were awake, looking up at him. Your lips curved in a small smile at his reaction on realizing you were awake.

“Why the hell didn’t ya wake me up?” he asked you, studying your expression.

“Because you need sleep,” you said softly.

He rolled his eyes. “You’re the one in the damn hospital bed and you’re tryin’ to take care of me still? Stop,” he drawled. Dr. Carson arrived at your side and grinned down at you. “Good to see you awake,” he said, putting his stethoscope in his ears and listening to your heart and lungs. “How are you feeling?”

Daryl was standing anxiously at your side, rocking on his feet.

“Tired,” you said softly. “And a bit confused.” You looked back over at Daryl. “What happened? I remember getting here and then��nothing.”

He nodded, his nose nudging up slightly. “Ya just passed out all of a sudden.”

You frowned. “Oh. How long was I out?”

“Overnight,” Dr. Carson replied, letting the pressure out of the blood pressure cuff. “BP is normal.” He took in the color in your cheeks. “You look better. But I’d like you to stay here today and overnight again, just in case. We’ll keep giving you some more fluids and you need to eat and rest,” he emphasized. He put a hand kindly on your shoulder. “You’ve been through a lot. Take it easy.”

You looked back over at Daryl. His expression was disturbed and you felt a lump forming in your throat. You tried to swallow it but it didn’t budge.

“Are ya alright?” Daryl asked you. “Really?

You turned your eyes back up toward the ceiling and flashes of Negan surged forward in your mind. You could almost feel his hands on you, feel his lips on you. You shut your eyes tight and shrugged. “I don’t know,” you said softly. “But I will be.” You glanced back over at him. “Have you been here this whole time?”

He nudged his nose up twice in a nod. “Ya. And I ain’t leavin’. So dun even try.” He pulled his chair back over to your bedside again and sat down.

You studied his face, the bruises still glaring out at you. “You should go get cleaned up. And I hope you’ve been eating and—”

“I ain’t goin’ anywhere until you’re gettin’ out of here.” He held up a dirty plate though. “I’ve been eatin’. Sasha and Maggie keep shovin’ food on me.”

You nodded and sighed, feeling suddenly tired again. “Good. But you should shower, get some clean clothes that fit better…”

“Hey—” he said forcefully, grabbing your hand. You looked down at it in surprise. “I ain’t leavin’ ya in here alone.”

Your eyes flitted between his. “I’m okay. You can take care of you.”

He sighed heavily and shook his head. “Nah. ‘M good.”

Not too long after that, you drifted off to sleep again.

_ _ _ _ _ _

Daryl kept true to his word and slept slumped over at your bedside again despite your continued protests, waking every once and a while and studying your face, the relaxed pout of your lips. By the time you awoke the next morning and Dr. Carson came by, you were more than ready to get out of the medical trailer.

“You’re sure she’s alright,” Daryl asked, walking with Dr. Carson toward the door. You were changing into some clean clothes Maggie had brought by behind the curtain in the corner.

Dr. Carson nodded. “She is. She just needs to take it easy a while. Lots of rest and water. And you too,” he said, giving Daryl a sharp look. “You know where to find me if there’s anything you need.”

Daryl looked hesitant but he nodded. “Thanks,” he said gruffly. He pushed outside and found Enid waiting at the bottom of the stairs.

“Hey. Maggie sent me to show you where you and Y/N can stay.”

Daryl nodded, shrugging his hands into his pockets. “She’s just changin’,” he said. Enid nodded and they both patiently waited. The trailer door creaked open and you came down the steps looking like you were almost back to your old self.

“Good to see you up,” Enid said kindly, smiling at you. Enid showed you to a trailer that was sparsely furnished, but there was a bathroom and a couch and a large bed in one corner, along with a dining area and a little kitchenette. “We had other plans for this trailer but I think it will be better suited for you two for now, while you’re here. Unless you wanted to stay up in Barrington house,” she said.

“This is perfect.” You turned back to Enid. “Thank you.”

She nodded and smiled. “Maggie, Sasha, and I are just in the trailer right next door. It’s actually Jesus’ but he’s out on a run. But in case you need anything, that’s usually where you can find us.” She headed for the door but turned back with her hand on the doorknob. “I’m really glad you’re both here. And that you’re okay.”

You gave her a warm smile before she went out. The door snapped closed behind her and you suddenly felt completely lost, like you didn’t even know what to do with yourself.

You realized Daryl was standing close in front of you and you looked up, your eyes following up his broad chest, and landed on his face. He must have been able to read something in your expression.

He felt a constriction in his throat as you met his eyes and he finally realized how scared he actually had been when you had passed out. “Ya scared me,” he rasped.

You looked down toward your boots. “Sorry. I don’t know what happened.”

“I do,” he said. “Ya were so worried about me ya weren’t taking care of you.” His hands closed gently around your shoulders and as you looked up at him, into his blue eyes, you finally went to pieces, suddenly overwhelmed with everything that had happened. Tears poured down your cheeks and your shoulders shook as you tried to gasp in breaths, wanting to pull yourself together but feeling helpless to in that moment.

Daryl’s chest ached. He quickly pulled you against him and held you tight, feeling each hitch of your shuddered breaths. He just held you while you cried, squeezing his eyes shut against a few tears of his own born of rage and sadness and regret. And eventually your breathing evened out and smoothed beneath his hands, and you pulled gently back and wiped the tear streaks from your cheeks, looking up at him. He simply nodded.

You crossed the room and sank down on the couch, staring vaguely at the opposite wall, pressing a hand up to your forehead, leaning forward with your elbows on your knees for a long moment.

Daryl just stood a short distance away, chewing on his bottom lip… wishing he could read your mind.

At length you sat up again after rubbing both your hands down over your face. “I’m okay,” you whispered, seeing that he was still intent on you, his eyes narrowed. “Really.” You tilted your head in the direction of the bathroom. “You should go get cleaned up. I’ll be right here,” you said.

“Ya sure?”

You nodded. “Yeah. I’m sure.”

Daryl grabbed some clean clothes and went into the bathroom and shut the door quietly behind him. He stared at himself in the mirror for a long moment. It’d been so long since he’d seen himself. He sighed heavily and stripped off his clothes. He turned on the shower and stepped into the hot stream of water, gasping at the sensation of it pouring over his skin, leaning his head back and letting it run over his face, soaking his sore and bruised body. He hastily washed his hair and scrubbed all the built-up dirt and grime from his skin, wincing a little as his hands moved roughly over bruises on his ribs and back from his last beating.

At length, Daryl came out of the bathroom. His wet hair was sending drops of water down to pepper his shirt. He looked so much better, just having gotten the dirt and grime rinsed off his skin and out of his hair and you couldn’t help smiling at him.

“Better?” you asked.

“Mhm,” he hummed.

You were waiting on the couch with a first aid kit and beckoned him over with a nod. He licked his bottom lip and huffed a little but wandered over and sat down next to you. You grabbed some alcohol pads and took his hand, the one with the split knuckles and swelling, pulling it over onto your lap. You cleaned it up and put some ointment on his knuckles. The whole time you felt nervous with his hand in yours and Daryl was feeling an obnoxious flutter in his chest as your fingers floated over his skin. He couldn’t take his eyes off you.

“You should have had Dr. Carson look at this—make sure it isn’t broken,” you said, pausing with the bandage in your hand.

“Nah. S’fine,” Daryl said.

You gave him a knowing look. “It could be a boxer’s break,” you said, starting to wrap the bandage gently over his knuckles and around his palm. “Happens when you punch a hard surface. Like a wall,” you said quietly. Your words suggested you knew exactly how he had injured his hand, that night after he had been forced to see you on Negan’s lap.

Daryl gulped and avoided your eyes. “Ain’t broken.”

You nodded. “Okay. There. Done.” You looked up at his face and realized he truly looked exhausted. “You need real rest,” you said. “Not locked in a cell rest or slumped over at my bedside rest.”

“’M fine,” he said, getting up and going over to the table to grab some food from the basket Maggie had left for you both.

Your brow furrowed and you gave him a look.

“What?”

“No,” you repeated, shaking your head. “You’ve been sleeping, or not sleeping, on a hard floor as long as they had you. And you haven’t slept properly since we got here.”

He stared at you with narrowed eyes, getting ready to argue.

“Daryl. I’m fine. And we’re safe. You can rest.” It was like your permission was the last thing he needed. You watched his shoulders visibly slump. He conceded. “Alright…” He walked over to the bed and laid down carefully. You could tell he was in pain when he moved and your brow furrowed.

He adjusted the pillow under his head. “Well, what are ya gonna do?”

You shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe go fill in Maggie. Tell her what happened.”

A shadow darkened his face. “I told her a little. After you were, ya know, with the doc. But not much.”

You nodded. “Okay.” You started toward the door and he sat back up halfway.

“Hey. Just—ya ain’t goin’ outside the walls, right?”

` ` You shook your head. “No.”

“Promise me,” he growled.

His concern was clear. You nodded. “I promise. Get some rest.”

Daryl watched the door close behind you and sighed, sinking back onto the bed and draping an arm over his eyes. Part of him wanted to ask you to stay… but what would he say? That he needed you nearby? Needed to know you were safe? That he wanted you right beside him… He wasn’t feeling brave enough for that yet no matter how badly he wanted it.

You walked to the next trailer over and the door was propped open, letting in the sunshine and a breeze. Maggie was sitting at the table eating a snack and looking over some papers. Enid was sitting nearby.

“Hey,” Maggie said, giving you a smile. “You look better. It’s good to see you out and about. Where’s Daryl?”

You nodded and shoved your hands into your pockets. “I convinced him to try and get some actual sleep.”

“Good. He needs it,” she said, her eyes turning a little sad. “Ya know, he completely refused to leave your side while you were out.” She gave you a pointed look and you felt your cheeks flush but you pretended you hadn’t heard her. “What’s up?”

“Umm, I just thought—maybe I’d fill you in on what happened. And I wondered if you knew anything about everyone back in Alexandria.”

She nodded. “To my knowledge everyone else back home is alright. Rick’s been scavenging for the Saviors. They’ve been making pick-ups so far for Negan. But supplies are getting scarce.”

You nodded.

“Come on and sit down,” Maggie said.

“Do you want me to go? I could—”

“It’s alright, Enid,” you said kindly. “No reason for you to leave. I don’t have anything left to hide at this point…” You heaved a deep breath and let it out. “I haven’t even told Rick any of this yet because before I could Daryl was gone. And I just went after him, to get him back. I didn’t want to wait another second.”

Maggie nodded and her brow furrowed as she listened intently. “He told us. Just a little bit. About what you did. You don’t have to tell us anything more if you don’t want to.”

“It’s okay. I—I think I’d rather just get it out, you know?” You related your story to her and Enid. You were grateful they didn’t interrupt you because you were afraid if you stopped you wouldn’t be able to start up again. You explained what you had done to get Daryl out, going back to Negan and being one of his ‘wives’ again. Maggie reached out and grabbed your hand, giving it a squeeze as her eyes filled with tears.

“My God. Y/N,” she said when you had finished. “He could have killed you on sight.”

You nodded. “He could have. But I had a feeling he wouldn’t. And he didn’t.” She squeezed your hand again.

Enid was looking at you with round eyes.

You felt your cheeks turning pink and shook your head. “I just did what needed to be done. To get him out.”

Maggie grabbed you suddenly into a tight hug, squeezing a little of the air from your lungs. “Thank you. For bringing him back to us. And you came back to us, too.” She pulled back and gave you a teary smile, which you returned. “I can’t imagine what you went through. But I’m just so grateful you’re both here.”

“Me too.” You got up and Enid stood to grab you in a tight hug too. You smiled at her a little awkwardly. “I think I’m just gonna take a walk around a bit. Get some air,” you said with a small smile.

“Alright. Take it easy, though,” she cautioned. “Doc’s orders.” You nodded and headed back outside.

You ended up in the stables, petting the horses and brushing them down just to pass the time. You were grateful for the distraction. Your mind wandered to Daryl frequently and you sincerely hoped that he was getting some peaceful rest. He needed it. He deserved it.

You noticed Sasha up on the wall, standing watch near the gate and you headed over toward her.

“Hey,” you said, nearing the top of the ladder. You were a little winded. You still felt weak. Daryl’s guesses to Dr. Carson had been correct. You had hardly eaten or slept while you were at The Sanctuary, and it had taken more of a toll on you than you realized.

Sasha turned and helped you climb to your feet. “What the hell are you doin’ up here? You’re supposed to be taking it easy!” she said.

“Yeah, I know,” you sighed. “I’m trying.” You looked out over the wall, leaning on the top of the logs. A few walkers were staggering in the field in the distance and Sasha raised her eye to the scope of her rifle to watch them. You glanced over at her. “How are you doing? After everything? And Maggie? Really?”

Sasha gulped and lowered the gun with a heavy sigh. She shrugged and you saw pain in her eyes when she glanced at you. “I’m alive,” she muttered, before turning her eyes back to the field in front of you. “Maggie is too.”

“Yeah,” you said quietly, catching her meaning exactly. “We just—have to keep going.”

She looked over at you. “Daryl told us what you did. I can’t imagine—”

You sniffled and averted your eyes with a shrug. “I just had to get him out of there,” you said.

She nodded and turned again to stare back out over the fields.

“Have you been getting any trouble from Gregory?” you asked. Sasha scoffed and rolled her eyes.

“That man is a useless weasel. But he’s stayed away from me. Maggie’s been dealing with him.”

You picked at a soft spot on top of the log in front of you with your index finger. “He struck me as a nutless slimeball,” you muttered. It actually elicited a laugh from Sasha and you joined her in a low chuckle, shaking your head.

“That’s accurate,” she said appreciatively.

“Hey!” A familiar, gruff voice down below. Daryl. “What the hell are ya doin’?” he yelled up at you.

“Uh oh. Busted,” you said in an undertone to Sasha. She laughed again. You went to the edge of the lookout stand and peered down at him. “You’re supposed to be sleeping,” you said.

He shrugged vaguely and continued looking up at you. You turned back to Sasha. “See you later,” you said. You climbed down the ladder and were met at the bottom by the archer’s intense stare.

“What the hell are ya doin’ up there?”

You shrugged. “Just talking to Sasha,” you said.

Daryl scowled at you and shook his head. “Ya shouldn’t be up there. What if some of them are out there watchin’? What if they see ya?”

“They aren’t out there,” you said.

“Ya don’t know that!” he said angrily.

You sighed and put your hands on your hips, staring down at your boots. “Okay. Alright. I get it. I won’t go up there again.”

“Good,” he spat back at you.

You raised your eyebrows at him. “Did you get any sleep?” you asked. He started pacing back toward the trailer and you fell in behind him. He only grunted over his shoulder which you interpreted as an answer similar to ‘not much’. “How come?”

“I just couldn’t, alright?” he said, irritation evident in his voice.

“Daryl,” you said, reaching out and grabbing his arm gently. “What’s wrong? Why do you sound… pissed?”

He stormed into the trailer and rounded on you suddenly. There was clearly something going on in his blue eyes, turmoil. He paced in front of the couch for a moment as you stared at him, trying to decode his sudden agitation. “How could ya—how could ya do what ya did?!” he demanded angrily. “How could ya go back to him? Ya let him—how could ya let him—put his hands on ya? Ya let him—how—” his voice broke and the anger that was there a moment before was gone, replaced by anguish.

You felt a sinking feeling in the middle of your chest, right between your lungs, as you suddenly understood that his anger wasn’t really anger.

He froze and chewed his bottom lip anxiously. There was a long pause where you could feel a bubble of tension growing between the two of you. He couldn’t meet your eyes. “M’sorry. ‘M so sorry,” he said gruffly. “You were right about going after them, after Denise. I should have listened to ya,” he said. “But I was so damn angry... And now… S’my fault you had to go back to him. S’my fault he—he had you to—” His jaw clenched and he looked away, forcing in a breath. “It’s my fault Glenn’s dead. There’s a whole goddamn pile of things that are my fault.”

“Hey—” You shook your head. “No. No, you don’t get to do that. Even if you hadn’t gone out there, Dwight might have come back and found us and Alexandria anyway. And Glenn—you weren’t holding the bat, Daryl.”

“Ya weren’t there,” he growled. “It was my fault. It was.”

“No.” Your voice was forceful. “It wasn’t. I might not have been at the line up with our people but I’ve been at one before and there is no way to know how many people would have died anyway. Negan’s like that. His men are like that. Could have been more or less regardless of whatever you did that you think got Glenn killed.”

Daryl turned away. He stood stock-still in the center of the room, his shoulders tense. “You can be pissed at me or at the universe or whatever you want,” you said. “I really don’t care at this point because I’m just so damn happy you’re not in there anymore. It doesn’t matter what it took. I was gonna get you out. Nobody deserves to be treated that way, especially you.” You sighed heavily and stared at his back and broad shoulders. “You have to know that. It was my choice to go back.”

Just then, at possibly the worst time, there was a knock on the door and you turned to answer it with a heavy sigh. The so-called “leader” of Hilltop, Gregory, was standing there on the doorstep. “Well, hello,” he said, nodding his head. You stepped back and peered at him with dislike. Daryl spun around to glare him down. “Aren’t—can I come in?” he asked.

You stepped back begrudgingly so he could take another step inside. He cleared his throat a bit awkwardly and then put his hands on his hips, looking around the inside of the trailer. You noticed that Daryl picked up a crossbow he must have gotten from the armory and started fiddling with one of the bolts, purposely fixing his icy blue eyes on Gregory. “Well, now, Margaret—”

“Maggie,” you corrected him.

“Right. Maggie,” he started again, seeming to quail a little under the tone of your voice, “has said that you two escaped from The Saviors compound. Is that true?”

“Why do ya care?” Daryl snapped, leaning back against the dining table.

“Well, I care because this is my place and I am hoping to continue to have a peaceful working relationship with The Saviors and—and—and I,” he stammered, “don’t think that is possible if I am harboring fugitives amongst my people. Not safe for—for my community, you see.”

Daryl stood up, his chin inclined. “And?”

“And,” he said, raising a finger, “and I came to tell you that—you’re welcome to stay the night but I want you gone tomorrow. I have to do what’s right for my people.”

Daryl stepped forward his chest puffed up. “Who’s gonna throw us out? You?” he growled. “Ain’t no peace with The Saviors. You’ll figure that out eventually. Or did ya forget ya made a deal with us to get rid of ‘em?”

Gregory leaned back away from Daryl, who was getting right up in his face. “We haven’t had any trouble until—until you people showed up,” he said.

“Really?” you asked, crossing your arms over your chest. “Remember Craig? Your man that they took? Who got him back? We did. You would have just let him die.” You scoffed.

Gregory glared at you and gestured vaguely with a hand. “Aren’t you his—his wife? Don’t you have some loyalty to—”

“Ya better fuckin’ watch what you’re about to say,” Daryl growled, poking a finger into Gregory’s chest and posturing at him. Gregory stepped back. “Ya don’t know what the hell you’re talkin’ about,” he growled.

“It’s alright, Daryl. He’s obviously an idiot,” you said.

Gregory looked affronted. “What? I don’t have to stand for this! I’m the leader here! This is my place,” he said, puffing his chest out now. “If you both aren’t gone tomorrow, I’ll—I’ll tell Simon about all of you when they come for their next pick-up!”

Daryl hauled a fist back and punched Gregory hard across the face. His head snapped back and to the side and he let out a moan and groan dramatically. “Kal!” he yelled, for one of the guards. “Kal!”

Maggie and Enid appeared in the doorway as you were holding Daryl back from hitting Gregory again, your hands on his chest as he yelled at him over you. “Ya threatenin’ us, ya son of a bitch!? Ya don’t know who the hell you’re messin’ with!”

“Daryl! Hey! Daryl! Stop!” It was taking all your strength to hold him back. You could feel every muscle in his strong chest tensed beneath your hands.

“What’s goin’ on?” Maggie asked, her eyes wide.

“This prick threatened us!” Daryl roared. “Threatened to tell The Saviors about all of us here unless Y/N and I leave tomorrow,” he spat.

“Daryl!” you yelled again. You finally clasped his face in your hands and made him look at you. “Enough.” He softened immediately, his chest heaving. He stopped trying to push through you and instead paced a short distance away after your hands slipped from him.

“You threatenin’ us now?” Maggie asked him. Gregory was a pitiful sight, clutching a hand to his face where Daryl had punched him. “Do I have to remind you who exactly is trying to solve your problem with The Saviors?” Maggie drew herself up to her full height again. “We aren’t goin’ anywhere. And you’re not tellin’ The Saviors a damn thing. Ya know why? Because you need us. Things are gonna go bad for you soon enough. And when the time comes, you’re gonna need us to save your ass. You’re gonna need us to save your community because we actually know how to fight.”

“Get the fuck outta here,” Daryl snapped at him.

Gregory gave everyone a parting glare and laid it on thick, actually limping down the stairs and moaning about going to see Dr. Carson. You rolled your eyes and exchanged a look with Maggie.

“Ya alright?” she asked you. You nodded.

“Fine.”

“Alright. We’ll talk tomorrow. Goodnight,” she said. You slammed the trailer door shut and turned to look at Daryl, who was still fuming.

“Ya shoulda let me hit him again,” he growled, grabbing his crossbow again.

“I think the one you got was good enough,” you said. You gulped at the lump in your throat. “Thanks for that. For standing up for me when he—”

“S’nothin’. That asshole dunno what the hell he’s talkin’ about.”

You nodded. “I’m tired,” you mused aloud.

Daryl nodded. “Ya. Ya need more rest. I’ll take the couch,” he said, setting his crossbow down and heading toward it.

“Seriously?”

His confused eyes snapped back at you. “What?”

You sighed. “Daryl, you’re not sleeping on the couch. Come over here,” you said, tilting your head. You walked over to the bed and pulled the covers back on one side, slipping underneath them. “I’ll take this side. You take the other.” You climbed into bed.

Daryl watched as you settled into the pillow, exhaustion settling over you. You could feel his eyes on you and you propped yourself up on your elbow. You anxiously chewed your bottom lip, wondering how much of what you were thinking that you should actually say.

“It’ll help me sleep… if you’re right here,” you said softly.

Daryl’s heart raced in his chest. How could he deny you that? And in truth, that was all he wanted, to be right there with you, knowing you were safe, asleep, beside him, out of the reach of Negan and his wandering hands. His mind wandered to what it would be like to have you fall asleep in his arms. He nudged his chin up a couple times. “Alright.”

“Thanks,” you murmured. You sighed and settled back into the pillow. You kept your eyes closed, but didn’t sleep yet, listening to Daryl softly moving about the room for a little while longer. Eventually you heard the soft rustling of fabric beside you and felt his weight on the other side of the bed.

He propped up the pillow and sat back against it on the headboard, his legs stretched out on top of the blankets, crossed at the ankles.

You smiled to yourself and finally allowed yourself to drift off.

[minghaocouture]

Pairing: Kwon Soonyoung X Gender Neutral Reader Genre: Modern Magic AU, Fluff Warning: Language WC: 4K+

A/N: @svtxsoju​ HAPPY HOLIDAYS BINU!!! I know it’s a bit late but here you got <333 I wub you sooooo much and I hope you have a happy new year!! Also this is the last of my simper council holiday gifts so once the new year starts i’ll go back to working on my actual requests!

“That’ll be $24.78” The rather small vile in your hand held no more than 8mm of the shiny silver liquid. It was strange, and almost looked like glittery dish soap if you had no clue what you were looking at. It wasn’t a surprise to you when your customer gasped, shocked at how much such a small amount cost. His open palm slammed down harshly on the counter that separated the two of you.

“That’s ridiculous! Vetra’s shop was selling this for $10!” At his words, you wrapped your fingers around the small vial and pulled it away from him. 

“Then go buy it at Vetra’s place, half the price for half the quality.” You retorted, rolling your eyes at the man’s attempt to have you lower your price. “Some of us actually put in the labor to make these potions, and I’ll be damned if I slaved over these vials just for some ass wipe to try and get me to dock my prices. So either buy this for $24, or get out of my shop.”

It might have seemed harsh, but you weren’t one to put up with bullshit. There were quite a few potion shops around town but very few actually made their own stock, many just buying it online and reselling it in a different container. Not you though, you put energy and so much magic into your work and you weren’t going to be haggled. At least not by some low rank vampire trash who thought he was better than everyone. 

The male bared his fangs towards you, causing you to roll your eyes. Your free hand subtly reaching down below your register and grabbing a small pure silver dagger, just to prepare for a fight just in case. Vampires were usually the ones who tried to start something, so it was left there as a precaution for yourself and your employees. 

The vampire growled, his eyes flickering over to a display of yours and you felt your heart sink. With a speed you could barely see the male had thrust his arm out, knocking the carefully put together display from the counter before he stormed out of the store.

“Get out of my way!”  You heard him shout, shoving past a customer who was trying to enter the building. 

You called out a small welcome as the door shut but didn’t bother to identify the new customer as you got to cleaning up. It wouldn’t be terrible but it was very annoying and exhausting. Placing your dagger back into its usual position before pulling your wand out of your back pocket. 

“Novis Tempus” You muttered, flicking your wand into the direction of the mess now covering the linoleum floor of your shop. You felt the magic slip from your core, travel through your fingertips, down the mahogany of your wand and seeping out from the purples and blue of the fluorite perched at the end of your wand.

Your spell slipped through the air, a small light pink aura circling the mess that had spilled. Slowly it began to change. The liquid from the spilled vials slithered back into the glass, the shattered vials stitching themselves back together, and the wood from the broken standee returning to its rightful positions. It took a few seconds but you always loved watching as it happened, and soon your display was once again perched on the countertop where it had previously been standing. 

Despite being a rather seasoned witch, the spell was advanced and took quite a bit of energy which left you rather exhausted. You were pretty grateful that your cover, a younger and much less experienced witch, named Christopher, would be arriving within the hour to take over so you could recoup the spent energy.

“Looks like I missed a party!” 

The familiar voice instantly brought a grin to your face, your eyes flickering over to be greeted by the bright shining face of your favorite customer.

“Soonyoung! I thought you weren’t gonna make it in today, you’re later than usual.” You replied, making your way over to where you kept your...commissioned items. It was rare for you to get werewolves in here, most of their species didn’t really try to tone down their transformations, they enjoyed letting out their beast once a month. Not to mention how dangerous, time consuming, and expensive making a wolfsbane potion was, which definitely made them...one of your more pricey items that you would only make if requested, so most werewolves couldn’t afford it even if they wanted to. (though if someone was really desperate and you had the time you’d probably give them the first one for free. You’re not completely heartless.)

The male jutted out his lower lip at his words being ignored, it was kind of ridiculous how adorable he was when he pouted like that. Maybe that was why you poked his buttons like that, or at least the buttons you were aware of. Despite his monthly visits, you hadn’t tried to meet him outside of work before. A shame really.

As you crouched down to the bottom shelf where you kept requests, you heard the male start up. His voice always brought a smile to your face, his mood must just be contagious. 

“I uhh missed my train?” Obviously a lie, but you weren’t going to point it out. After all, it wasn’t any of your business; he was just a customer. A very funny and endearing customer but a customer nonetheless. 

Pulling out the large circular bottle, complete with a wooden cork shoved into the neck. The light blue liquid swirled in the glass with an almost eerie glow. You doubted that you would ever get used to the aura that the wolfsbane potion gave off. Bottle in hand, you returned to your register where Soonyoung stood with a small almost nervous grin on his face. Placing the bottle down on the marble countertop, you slid it forward with a single finger.

“Well, you better head out then, before you miss your train home.” You joked, watching as the tension seemed to drift away from him. At least he seemed more comfortable now. “Same thing for next month? Doing another early payment?”

You watched Soonyoung grab the fragile bottle and slide it snuggly into the backpack he was carrying (you were honestly surprised it survived the trip home considering how you’d seen the young man run.) As he did so, he pulled out the familiar pale blue wallet that he kept inside. 

“As always! You already know my schedule so well!” He said happily, pulling out a bundle of cash and handing it over to you. “It’s on the 25th next month and I can come grab it on the 21st. Is that enough time?” 

His question caused you a brief pause, filing through a mental category of your stock. You were almost out of moonstone after the last potion so you’d need to restock and then powder that, but nothing extreme so you confirmed this with a nod and a finalization of his payment. 

“Well, I’ll see you next month then!” Considering this had been your routine for the past few months, you expected a small farewell before the bleach blond bounded from the store. So you pulled out your inventory book and began writing notes about his potion. Today was different though, as he lingered. You could feel his piercing eyes on you for a moment, just watching before he spoke up once more.

“I was...actually wondering if you were free anytime today?” You froze, your pen hovering over the parchment as your brain processed what had just been asked of you. Weighing the pros and cons of being honest with him, on one hand he was kind and you had just been thinking about what it would be like to actually befriend the male but on the other hand, this could have been a long game plan if he was some crazy killer. It was unfortunately, but you had to think of things like that, especially with the recent surge of missing persons cases. 

“No pressure! I know it’s super weird and suspicious that I’m asking buuut, you’re pretty cool and I’d actually like to get to know you! Not to be a creep, but like as a friend.” 

It was sweet, and the smile on his face was definitely inviting enough. So against your better judgement, you let out a small sigh.

“I get off at 5, think you can wait til then?” 

If his neutral face was bright, then his cheerful one was blinding. His grin stretched from ear to ear and you watched as he pumped a fist into the air out of excitement. It was honestly really sweet and made your heart flutter that he was that excited to spend time with you outside of work. 

“Yeah! I’ll hang around the district and come back when you’re off!” With that the male literally bounded out of your shop. As the door slammed shut behind him, silence surrounded you and couldn’t stop the joyful laughter from spilling from your lips.  

You helped out a few more customers before Chris arrived, but once he did you quickly got to work on preparing to leave. Doing things like going over inventory, and rearranging some things that customers had decided to touch, with just a bit more pep in your step than usual. Which Chris definitely noticed.

“Someone’s in a hurry. Usually I have to push you out the door, just so you’ll go home and rest.” You had known Chris for a few years and he of course had seen right through you. Because of this you saw no reason to defend yourself.

“Yeah, you know that Werewolf regular?”

“Soonyoung?”

“Yeah, him. Well, he asked if I wanted to hang out after work,” You explained, trying to keep casual about the whole ordeal despite how excited you were. Finalizing your inventory check, you slid your work book back under the counter and when you stood up once more, Chris was smirking in your direction, rather smugly in fact. “What?”

“I was wondering when this was going to happen. He’s always making eyes at you whenever he comes in. It’s right cute.” He teased, and you were grateful that no one else was in the store to hear this. Feeling a heat rush to your face, you rolled your eyes at the male.

“Come off it Chris, He does not.”

“He does! He’s always like this!” He exclaimed, before quickly adjusting his position to show an example. Leaning one elbow on the counter he placed his cheek in his palm and just began staring at you with a sweetly intent look. You hated to admit it, but you had caught Soonyoung staring like that...once or twice, but you weren’t going to tell Chris that.

“Maybe you need to go get those eyes checked out, cause you’re seeing things.” You declared, slipping past him into the break room that was hidden past the door behind the counter. You almost cheered in relief as you heard the familiar bell ring through the store, signaling a new customer entering. Which meant that Chris wouldn’t be able to follow after you and the embarrassment would be over.

That was...not the case when you heard Chris’ cheerful voice greet the customer.

“Soonyoung! Nice to see ya! It’s been a while, you usually come in when I’m off.” 

You mind blanked and you quickly got all of your belongings together, shoving your phone in your pocket before rushing out of the break room. Only to find Soonyoung and Chris laughing cheerfully as they spoke to one another. You almost let out a physical sigh of relief when you realized it was just a regular conversation and Chris hadn’t strayed the topic over to you. 

When Soonyoung saw you though, his eyes lit up like it was some sort of holiday even though he had just seen you about an hour ago. Honestly, nothing had probably even changed about your appearance since then and yet he still looked at you like you...radiant. 

“See ya later Chris, you have my number if anything happens. Don’t burn down the store!” The male in question quickly formed a mock salute that was almost as serious as a real one, if it weren’t for the intent purpose of making fun of you. 

“Aye aye, Parental unit!”

Rolling your eyes, you gestured for Soonyoung to follow you and soon the two of you were gone. Off on an adventure that would be the first spark in a well lit fire.

***

When you left with Soonyoung, you were expecting the typical things that a guy does when he takes people out. What you got was...much different. 

He started off by taking you to get a bite to eat, you were pretty hungry after your shift and so you were pretty grateful for that. The place was pretty small, a little mom and pop shop run by some friends of his named Seungkwan and Seokmin. If you thought Soonyoung was funny, then him with his two friends was absolutely hysterical, especially when he would tell stories of their adventures and imitate his two friends. (Seungkwan was not happy about that later part). 

That’s when things took a turn.

Instead of a typical, let’s go see a movie, Soonyoung suggested a nearby gym area. Now it wasn’t really a ‘gym’, it was more of an entertainment location. It had things like rock climbings, a large number of trampolines, and even some feats of courage where you would try to jump from a singular platform to a large punching bag looking object while you were at least 20 feet off the ground (or at least that’s what it felt like once you were up there). 

Which is currently where you were, harness strapped snuggly around you and a helmet placed firmly on your head. Eyes staring out at the large gap between you and your target, your hands pressing firmly against the cold metal of the pillar that you had just climbed up.

“Going to be completely honest, Soonie! I don’t think I got this!” You called out to the male who stood below with the service tech. He was suited up quite similarly as he was preparing to go right after you, but had dared you to try it first since you’d never been here before.

“I thought you were a witch, don’t witches fly?” He called back, confusion lacing his voice. It did provide a small laugh from you. 

“Flying on a broomstick, and jumping crazy distances are two completely different things! I really don’t think I can do this!”

“Yes you can! Just scream Horanghae, it can take away all your fears!” He shouted back, earring him a rather confused look from you.

“Horanghae??”

“Horanghaaaaaae!” His voice almost tripled in volume as he confirmed the rather strange phrase, you probably wouldn’t have thought anything of it if he were like...a were-tiger, but he wasn’t. He was just full of surprises.

Taking a deep breath you heard him chant the phrase as you steeled yourself. With one last intake, you leaped forward with a loud scream of, what seemed to be, his favorite word. To your surprise, the distance was quite small once you were in the air and you latched onto the tube like a koala. Your was heavy and your heart was throbbing, but hearing Soonyoung go absolutely crazy below in excitement made it all worth it.

The two of you didn’t stay too much longer after that, going out into the now dark city. You hadn’t even realized how late it had gotten until you exited the building and were on your way to what Soonyoung was referring to as the ‘last bit’.

Now here you were, laying on your back in the middle of a park and staring up at the stars. Soonyoung was going on and on about the stars and these different constellations that his friend Wonwoo had shown him. It was...sweet, but you were only partially listening. You were conflicted, you really really liked him but...he was a customer. Wouldn’t it be weird to be crushing on a customer? Wouldn’t it? 

“And that one is my favorite because it looks like a tiger! Isn’t it cool?”

Your eyes drifted over to him as he stared up at the night sky with those bright cheerful eyes that seemed to envelop your whole being with joy. His pale blonde hair gently brushed against his forehead with every small gust of wind. The light in his brown eyes was enchanting to see, and his smile...well it was radiant. 

“Yeah...it’s beautiful.”

But you weren’t talking about the stars.

***

“And every time he’s around my heart is racing and It’s like all I can think about is him! Do you know how hard it is to help other customers when he comes into the store? It’s impossible.” It hadn’t been your intent to rant to Chris about Soonyoung, yet here you were. He had just asked if you were hanging out with the wolfman today and that sparked a 20 minute long tangent about the last 6 months that you had been spending with Soonyoung outside of work.

“You’re in love with him?”

“Chris you can’t just say the L word out loud!” You exclaimed, slapping a hand over Christopher’s mouth as if his words would call the male into the store. Chris rolled his eyes and peeled your hand off of his face before taking a grip on your shoulders. 

“Just confess to him, it’s not like he doesn’t feel the same way. I swear you could dump boiling hot soup on his lap and he would thank you just because it’s you.” Chris declared, which was absolutely ridiculous. No one would thank someone for pouring soup on them, that was a dumb analogy.

You shrugged off his hands, and propped yourself up on the countertop since there were no customers in the store. Crossing your arms over your chest and letting out a frustrated groan as your gaze lifted to the ceiling. 

“He’s still a customer, wouldn’t that be weird.” Out of the corner of your eye you could see Chris fixing you with a rather confused look. So you continued. “I mean, like what if he doesn’t like me and then it’s super awkward and he feels uncomfortable coming back into the shop? Not only would I just get to deal with a broken heart, but he could also like report us? Right? For like, being inappropriate?”

Chris snorted in disbelief at your ridiculous statement, so you turned your gaze to him and shot a glare in his direction. 

“He wouldn’t report you, dumbo. I’m telling you, just go for it. You might be pleasantly surprised with his response.”

Before you could retort, claiming that Chris was being way too optimistic for his own good, the doorbell rang and the two of you turned to greet the new customer.

“Soonyoung! What a surprise, we were just talking about you!” Your heart sunk at Chris’ words, and you shot him a dirty look, jamming your elbow harshly into his side. Which caused him to let out a loud yelp as you greeted Soonyoung. 

The male in question didn’t seem to notice anything was odd, and just beamed at the two of you as he sauntered up to the counter. The weight in your back pocket felt heavy as you watched him. It was a few days before his birthday and the two of you decided to hang out together since you wouldn’t be able to take the whole day off for his party (yes you were the boss, but it was just you and Chris and you weren’t gonna leave the poor guy alone all damn day. You weren’t heartless). He greeted Chris with a grin before turning his attention solely to you.

“Ready to head out?”

“Almost I’ve still got to fin-”

“Yup, they’re totally ready!” Chris exclaimed, shoving you towards the gap in the counter as he cut you off. “I’ve got everything under control here! Have fun kids!” Honestly it felt like he was your parent sending you off on your first date which made this all the more embarrassing. 

Soonyoung seemed to notice the conflicting words and a bright laugh left his lips, his eyes slipping shut as his smile grew with his laughter. It only took a moment for him to recover and then extend his hand towards you, and without even thinking about it you took the offered hand. You could practically feel Chris’s eyes boring into your skull, the smug look on his face saying ‘i told you so’, as the two of you left the store. 

You lead Soonyoung by the hand over to your car and he quickly climbed into the passenger side of the car. You followed much slower, pulling his gift out of your pocket before sliding into the drivers seat.

Not bothering to turn the car on yet, you turned to face him. The small black box held tightly in your hands, as if it were the only thing keeping you cemented in the moment. You almost wished you had taken one of those courage potions you sold, maybe you’d be less anxious right now, but you wanted this moment to be true to your feelings and the potion would have just muddled that up. Giving you a false sense of strength when you needed to find it on your own this time. 

“Happy Birthday Soonie.” You flashed him a small smile, passing over the tiny box. He gasped and took it from you quickly, pulling open the lid to reveal a necklace. The cord was made of leather, which would be smoother to wear than a metal chain, and a gem at the center. A piece of Tiger’s eye with a shiny golden wire wrapped intricate around the stone which kept it in place.

“It’s not much but that’s a Tiger’s eye. It wards off negative energy, dispels fears, and helps bring good luck. I mean, it had more uses than that, those are just some of them. I figured it’d be good for you since you said you were worried about starting that new job, and it’s also a tiger’s eye and I know you really like tigers, and i like you so obviously i remembered that about you. “ You continued to ramble on as Soonyoung pulled the necklace out of the box and stared at it as if you had just gifted him the most priceless gem in the world. Your heart ached as you watched him slip the cord over his neck and turn to face you. Your heart sputtered as his eyes met yours and you felt yourself practically melt in your seat when he took your hand once more.

“Was that a confession I heard? You really like me? Like...like like me?” All at once you realized what you had done, Chris would never let you hear the end of this. It was probably the worst confession in the history of confessions.

You tore your gaze away, your eyes firmly planting on the sight of his hand gripping yours. 

“I mean, yeah what’s not to like. You’re hilarious, sweet, and honestly really hot too. It’s almost ridiculous how perfect you are, and I jus-” You felt your words trail off as his free hand reached out and cupped your cheek, forcing you to look up at him once again. You almost completely combusted at the sight of his watching you as if you had hung the stars just for him.

“Would it be cheesy to say that cast a love spell on me.”

“Love spells are highly illegal.”

“Just let me be cheesy!” He pouted, but his eyes never lost that loving spark. He leaned forward, pressing his forehead to yours and you felt like time had completely come to a stand still. You knew what you wanted, and from what he said you were hopeful that he wanted the same thing.

“Soonyoung, will you...kiss me?” As soon as the question left your lips, he had taken them with his own. It was like something clicked into place as he kissed you, his lips pressing firmly against your own as his hand slid to gently grip the back of your neck. Everything was perfect, he was perfect. 

When the moment passed, he pulled away and let out a laugh.

“Best. Birthday. Gift. Ever.”

[gaangadventures]

Soulmates

Part One / Part Two

Feel free to request if you want! 

You had hardly been able to sleep on the bison’s saddle, and you weren’t entirely sure whether it was because you were used to sleeping on an actual bed, or because of the distrusting looks you kept getting. Which was fair you thought, your brother happened to throw their grandmother after rudely grabbing her and then terrified their village.

Although, you couldn’t exactly say you knew why they hated the Fire Nation so much, not by every detail at least. You managed to hear a little bit of truth from your uncle when your brother was too busy either skulking or dramatically burning things. 

But maybe you just liked to hear stories, turning your gaze to the sun rising in the sky. Like a true firebender you thought, crossing your legs and placing your wrists on your knees while you closed your eyes.

Meditating while flying in the air was certainly something, you almost wanted to ask for another ride on his glider. That had been fun, but you couldn’t say that you wanted to because like almost everyone you were related to, you had a bit of an issue with your pride.

Waiting until everyone was awake to open your eyes wasn’t all that difficult, as you had been more focused on meditating and the sun was always helpful in that regard. 

They were already lowering down to the ground when you opened your eyes, the light making it seem like it was a new place. But you had already seen it before, a few months before your brother had come across the water tribe and the avatar himself.

“Wait ‘til you see it Katara, the air temple is one of the most beautiful places in the world.” You held back a wince at his optimism, not having wanted to say anything and end up hurting him.

“Aang, I know you’re excited, it’s been a few hundred years since you’ve been home.” Katara tried to say, only for said avatar to get even more excited about returning.

“That’s why I’m so excited!”

“It’s just that a lot can change in that time.” 

:”I know, but I need to see it for myself.” He added, and you only looked down at your hands as Aang hopped off of Appa after tying off the reins, you weren’t quite sure exactly what he was doing.

“Wake up Sokka, air temple here we come!” He exclaimed, leaning over the older boy who was still lying on the ground, all bundled up in the sleeping bag?

“Sleep now. Temple later.” He responded, before turning around and immediately beginning to snore. Aang practically lit up like a light bulb when he suddenly got an idea, getting a mischievous smile on his face, before picking up a stick and lightly drew it along Sokka’s sleeping bag.

“Sokka, wake up! There’s a prickle snake in your sleeping bag!” He called out, 

“Ahhh! Get it off! Get it off! Ahh!” The water tribe boy was quick to get up, jumping around inside of his sleeping bag before promptly falling face-forward. You tried to hide your snickers while his sister and Aang had no qualms about it.

“Great, you’re awake, let’s go.” He had said, and the four of you were back to flying on Appa after camping for the night.

Hearing a surprisingly loud stomach growl, you’d been surprised to learn that it hadn’t been you.

“Hey, stomach, be quiet, alright? I’m trying to find us some food.” You heard from Sokka, and you briefly glanced at him, unsure of whether or not you should give him some advice on hunger, but you assumed that he would probably not like that.

So you chose not to say anything this time. After all, you had gone hungry more times than you could count on both hands. Who would have wanted a princess who ate too much anyway? When you were younger, you used to sneak into the kitchen to get more food, but you made sure to eat it in your brother’s room since you would’ve gotten in trouble if they knew it was you.

“Hey! Who ate all my blubbered seal jerky?” He ended up asking, after searching through his pack and finding nothing. You would’ve shared yours, if you had enough time to grab anything when you left.

“Oh, that was food? I used it to start the campfire last night. Sorry.” Aang admitted, looking back at his friend, although your gaze was back on the cloud, only half-way paying attention.

“You what? Aww. No wonder the flames smelled so good.” Sokka muttered, and you bit your tongue as your own stomach growled.

“The Potola mountain range! We’re almost there!” The avatar exclaimed, finally drawing your attention.

“Aang, before we get to the temple, I want to talk to you about the airbenders.” Katara started, and you avoided looking anywhere but the two talking.

“What about them?”

“Well, i just want you to be prepared. The Fire Nation is ruthless. They killed my mother, and they could’ve done the same to your people.” With that, you couldn’t help but wince, and you agreed. You couldn’t help but look at your shoulder when she spoke, you could have sworn you saw a spark of yellow coming from your hand. 

Looking down at your hands, you let out a breath of relief when you saw that it wasn’t lightning like you feared, but fire still.

“Just because no one has seen an airbender doesn’t mean the Fire Nation killed them all.” How was he still so optimistic? You knew that it was clear that the Fire Nation had ruined lives, families, and more that you probably didn’t know about.

“No, she has a point.” You added quietly, not having expected anyone to really hear you speak but it caught more attention than you meant.

“They probably escaped.” He continued, his gaze moving from the sky back to Katara.

“I know it’s hard to accept.” She started, 

“You don’t understand Katara, the only way to get to an airbender temple is on a flying bison. And I doubt the Fire Nation has any flying bison. Right, Appa?” he asked, petting him and he started to fly around a mountain.

You blinked for a moment, not wanting to show how vulnerable you really were at this point. Here you were, on a flying bison of all things, you had no clue where you were and you were starting to really regret sneaking out of the map-reading classes you had before.

Holding on tight to the saddle, you started to go up higher through the mountain and above a forest, only to see the temple.

“There it is, the Southern Air Temple.”

“Aang, it’s amazing!”

“We’re home, buddy. We’re home.”

Truth be told, you were hardly paying any attention. You hadn’t been since you realized that this was your soulmate’s home and your nation had killed his people. You may not have been the one to order it, but it was your family. Were the spirits losing it? Why would they have matched the two of you up?

With that thought, you hesitated in getting off of Appa when he had landed on the ground. You had heard of people having different soulmates in a book you read once, so were you his? You already knew that he was yours.

You were grateful for a moment that they hadn’t particularly wanted to talk to you, or your quietness probably would’ve been mentioned already.

“So where do I get something to eat?”

“You’re lucky enough to be one of the first outsiders to ever visit an airbender temple, and all you can think about is food?”

“I’m just a simple guy with simple needs.” Listening to the two siblings talk had made you miss your own, but you certainly hadn’t missed the expectations that came with either one.

“So that’s where my friends and I would play airball, and over there is where the bison would sleep.” Aang had said, pointing out to each place when you and the water tribe siblings had caught up with him. He let out a sigh, dropping his hands as if he was beginning to realize something.

“Aang, what’s wrong?”

“This place used to be full of monks and lemurs, and bison. Now there’s just a bunch of weeds. I can’t believe how much things have changed.” He finished, looking over the short cliff, before turning to look at the three of you.

“So uh, this airball game--how do you play?” Sokka asked, walking a bit closer to the edge of the cliff where the monk was. Was this going to be a fair game? Probably not, but you were hoping to see the water tribe boy lose anyway. With that simple question, he brightened and then the two had gotten onto the odd poles, each on the opposite sides. 

Aang began by making an airball and kicking it at an angle, only for it to ricochet between the poles and hit the older boy in his chest, knocking him off of it entirely.

“Aang 7, Sokka 0.” He laughed, making the numbers with his arms, a grin already on his face. As you tried to figure out how exactly the game was played, you hardly noticed what the nonbender was muttering.

“Hey Aang? What are the rules in this game?” You couldn’t help but ask. There were rules in everything, and this would most likely be no exception.

“There are no rules in airball! You just make an airball and get it through the hoop while the other person tries to stop it!” He had said, throwing you for a loop and the confusion must’ve been obvious on your face when he spoke again. “Here, I’ll show you!”

Making another airball wasn’t difficult at all in his case, but physically impossible in yours. Standing where Sokka had been was a little daunting, not that you would admit that, and you were about to hold your hands out to stop the airball, but you couldn’t bring fire to this place. Not when so many firebenders themselves had wreaked havoc here. You wouldn’t put yourself among them either.

“Aang, there’s something you need to see.” Katara had called out, and the two of you had started to head over there, Aang still playing with the airball.

 “What is it?” Knowing what the topic had been before, you had a suspicion of what it was but you weren’t going to mention it. But before he could see anything, the waterbender had moved the snow only for it to land on her brother. 

“Uhh, just a new waterbending move I learned.” You leaned forward to help the older boy with the snow, since as a firebender you could definitely do that, but he shrugged you off and you hadn’t attempted again.

“Nice one. But enough practicing. We have a whole temple to see.” Aang had said, already walking away from you three.

“You know, you can’t protect him forever.” Sokka was still brushing the snow off, and you couldn’t help but think that they were ignoring you. But with that thought, you had received a sideways glance from Katara and an attempted glare from Sokka. Resisting the urge to roll your eyes at the glare, you knew they had every right to not trust you and the like, but you had seen and gave better glares than that.

“Katara, firebenders were here. You can’t pretend they weren’t.” Only halfway listening to the siblings, you started to walk away and towards the fountain, barely catching a glimpse of Aang as he ran around.

You hardly remembered much about the temples or the three-year trip around the nations themselves, as you had still been recovering from your burns when your brother decided that he hadn’t needed you and by the time you had recovered, you wanted nothing to do with the Fire Nation.

Placing your hand onto the stone fountain, you could already see quite a bit of the snow melting around you, only for you to quickly take your hand off when you started to see steam. You had been losing most of your control with your firebending when you became upset, but that hardly ever showed when you weren’t.

Lost in your thoughts, you almost started to panic when you realized that the water tribe siblings were walking away until you had heard Aang call out to them, assuming that he had meant only them after all.

“Hey guys! I want you to meet somebody!” But at the exclamation, you couldn’t help but follow after them anyway.

“Who’s that?” Katara had been the first to ask, once they noticed Aang pointing to an old statue of an old man. 

“Monk Gyatso. The greatest airbender in the world.” He answered, turning to face the statue instead of his friends, only to turn back to them, gesturing to the statue. “He taught me everything I know.” Giving a bow to the statue itself mere moments after your soulmate had, you were saddened to see the run-down state of the statue

“You must miss him.” Was she always this motherly? You almost wanted to point it out, but you knew she had the ability to beat you in a battle and you were not willing to risk your life yet.

“Yeah.”

“Where are you going?”

“The Air Temple Sanctuary. There’s someone I’m ready to meet.” Who could be still alive long enough to meet him? No one, they wouldn’t be. Not after a hundred years, not to mention a literal genocide.

Following the avatar in the temple was an easy decision of yours, you had wanted to see it for yourself after your brother had mentioned it so many times anyway.

“But, Aang, no one could have survived in there for a hundred years.” The waterbender brought up, you agreed with her much to her dislike.

“Maybe they never did.” You added, slightly unsure of yourself upon seeing the trumpet-looking contraption at the door. How were any of you supposed to open that?

“It’s not impossible.” Aang spoke up, as the group had stopped before the large door. “I survived in the iceberg for that long.”

“Good point.”

“But you’re also the avatar.” You added, almost wanting him to stop being so optimistic for five seconds.

“Katara, Y/N, whoever’s in there might help me figure out this avatar thing.”

“And whoever’s in there might have a medley of delicious cured meats.” Running at the door, he had not made it through like he hoped, landing on the floor with an “oof.” He tried to push it open even after that though, and you almost wanted to laugh. “I don’t suppose you have a key.”

“It looks like it needs more than a key.” You looked at the door, thinking that maybe air had something to do with it, and your thought was proven correct when the airbender spoke up.

“The key, Sokka, is airbending.” He took a deep breath and gestured his hands to the door, air blowing into it, making the blue shells on it turn and show the other side. The doors began to open with ease, showing a room filled with statues as far you could see.

“Hello? Anyone home?” Aang was the first one to walk inside, with the three of you lagging a bit behind, and you were a bit ahead of the two siblings. You hadn’t wanted to intrude on really any of this, but you had read more than you had thought about the avatars, probably because of your brother. 

With that thought, you immediately frowned, having hoped for the three of you to reconnect but now, you were sure there was no chance of that for at least a while, considering your brother was most likely calling you a traitor for what you did and your sister, well, she was still in the palace with your father and it was the last place you had wanted her. If he hurt you and Zuko, who’s to say he wouldn’t hurt her?

“Statues? That’s it? Where’s the meat?” Shaking your head ever so slightly, you turned your attention to the older boy complaining of no food and you felt your eye twitch but you bit your tongue.

“Who are all these people?”

“I’m not sure, but it feels like I know them somehow.”

“They’re avatars.” You interrupted, only recognizing a few from what you had read about them, stepping towards a firebender while Aang and Katara pointed out airbenders and waterbenders, each to their respective element of course.

Leaving them be for a few moments, you began to follow the pattern of avatars across the room. Fire, air, water, earth. It took you a bit longer than you would’ve preferred, but you managed to find the last avatar. 

You glanced over when you heard footsteps coming towards you, seeing Aang as he looked up at the statue. You had been expecting for him to say something, but you noticed that he was practically entranced into staring up at the avatar before him.

“Aang!” You had spoken up, beginning to shake him and you were grateful that you hadn’t had to shake him for long. “Who is that?” When you asked it, you hadn’t been expecting an answer.

“That’s avatar Roku, the avatar before me.” He clarified, and you realized why he had looked somewhat familiar. You read about him, and that he’d been close to Sozin, your great grandfather. Close enough for him to give the crown prince ornament.

“You were a firebender? No wonder I didn’t trust you when we first met. Uh, no offense.” Sokka asked, as the two siblings grew closer to the last statue in the line.

“None taken.” You added, having heard worse but you mostly expected it.

“There’s no writing. How do you know his name?”

“I’m not sure. I just know it somehow.”

“You just couldn’t get any weirder.” The water tribe boy grunted out, and you sent a scowl for it, knowing that you might look more intimidating than your brother. 

But the group went silent once you could hear light footsteps and almost instantly each one of you hid behind a statue. Katara and Sokka were behind the same one, as well as Aang and yourself.

“Firebender. Nobody make a sound.” Sokka had whispered, and you gulped. There could have been a few stragglers, and you knew that there would be a bounty on your own head, much like it was with your brother and uncle. You had all been considered traitors to your nation and banished.

“You’re making a sound.” Katara retorted, and you couldn’t help but snicker at the two siblings while the boys continued to shush you both.

“That firebender won’t know what hit him.” You frowned at his words, but you had felt a spike of fear when it had been brought up. Would they act like this towards you one day? You severely hoped not, they could be quite destructive if they wanted.

As each of you had poked your head out from behind the statues, you heard a chittering and you immediately softened, your heart rate going back to normal as well.                                                                                                                                                                                                                 

“Lemur!”

“Dinner.” The two boys had said in unison, causing you to look at the only other girl in the group with a mildly concerned look. This wasn’t going to go well, was it?

“Don’t listen to him. You’re gonna be my new pet.”

“Not if I get to him first!” Your thoughts had proven correctly when Sokka and Aang began to run after the lemur, practically scaring it to death.

“Wait! Come back!”

“I want to eat you!”

You could only roll your eyes, before beginning to follow after them. The lemur needed a way to escape after all.

“Hey! Come back! Come on out, little lemur. That hungry guy won’t bother you anymore.” Aang said, moving some old curtains out of his way. “Firebenders? They were here?” He murmured, before moving his gaze to see the skeleton of his old mentor. ”Gyatso.” With that realization, he dropped down onto his knees.

“Hey, Aang, you find my dinner yet?” Sokka asked, moving the curtain as well as you had hurried after them, nearly tumbling into the older boy himself. You had let out a quiet gasp when you saw the room filled with Fire Nation soldier skeletons and only one airbending skeleton. But what had you most concerned was your first friend crying.

“Aang, I wasn’t really gonna eat the lemur, okay?” You only shook your head, making your way towards him, stepping past Sokka as you did so. “Oh, man. C’mon Aang. Let’s get out of here.” Before you could say anything to help, Sokka had put his hand on the avatar’s shoulder and his arrows and eyes started glowing.

“Aang, come on!” He tried, but the wind grew worse, sending both of you flying into the remains of a wall. But you had never been one to give up, and he started to levitate in the air, so you had to try something a bit different.

“I know you’re upset, and nothing can replace Gyatso! It’s hard to lose the people you love. Monk Gyatso and the other airbenders may be gone, but you still have a family. Katara, Sokka, and I, we’re your family now.” You yelled out, hoping that at least some of it would get through to him. And it seemed like it had when the wind died down and he started to come back down.

“We aren’t gonna let anything happen to you. Promise.” Sokka had said when you were finished, the two of you holding his hands for a moment and the glow from him faded and he fell into your side.

“I’m sorry.” 

“It’s okay.” You murmured, letting out a breath that you hadn’t even noticed you were holding. “It’s not your fault.”

“But you and Katara were right. And if firebenders found this temple, that means they found the other ones, too. I really am the last airbender.” You couldn’t help but just hug him. While you weren’t particularly keen on physical touch with anyone, he needed a hug and you happened to be the person that he was laying on.

When he was feeling a little better, the two of you headed back to the sanctuary while the two siblings started packing everything back up.

“How did you know what to say?”

“Well,” letting out a quiet laugh, you gave him a glance before continuing, “my mom disappeared when I was younger. Then more things happened, and I don’t think we have time for my whole life story.” What you said was true, you didn’t have much time before you would be leaving, but you were mostly looking for a way out of that conversation.

“Thanks, Y/N. But how is Roku supposed to help me if I can’t talk to him?”

“Maybe you’ll find a way.” You suggested, absolutely unsure of how that would happen. It’s not like they wrote instruction manuals on how to be the avatar, but in hindsight, maybe they should have.

“Everything is packed.” You heard Katara say, and quickly thanked her before hearing the same light footsteps from before, all of you turning to look at the lemur, only for it to drop food at Sokka’s feet.

“Looks like you made a new friend, Sokka.”

“Can’t talk. Must eat.” He spoke through a mouthful of food, and you almost laughed. If your father could see you now, he would’ve been so mad. But that wasn’t the case now. You weren’t Azula, and you spoke against him so perhaps he wouldn’t care at all. Regardless, you sorely hoped that he would be in for it, the next time you met.

“Hey, little guy.” Aang greeted the lemur that was now on his shoulders, and you couldn’t help but pet him. You always did have a soft spot for animals, and Appa was no exception.

“You, me, Appa--we’re all that’s left of this place. We have to stick together. Katara, Y/N, Sokka, say hello to the newest member of our family.”

“What are you gonna name him?” You asked, having been redoing your hair into two low braids and leaving it at that. Much different from having your hair up into a Fire Nation knot like you had been. With that question, the lemur had climbed onto you then Sokka, just to steal a moon peach an inch away from his mouth before scurrying back to Aang’s shoulders.

“Momo.” You couldn’t help but laugh along with them, finally beginning to feel like a part of the group instead of being just there like you had been for the start with them and the majority with your brother.

Maybe this could end well for you after all.

[clumsyclifford]

hm hi maybe i will officially ask you if you want to hurt me and write a therapy fic. i vote malum but. you do as— no you know what i'm me this is a malum prompt i'm sending you okay love you bye

hiya taylor i hope you realized when you asked for this that it would be angsty as fuck, so i really can’t apologize for uhh writing something angsty as fuck!! BUT with a hopeful ending because we know how i am

tw for suicide ideation, suicidal thoughts, depression

read it here on ao3

-

Michael is winded from the moment they walk onstage.

He’s been all smiles all day. Somewhere he’d heard that smiling was supposed to trigger some kind of happy brain chemical, a creepy fake-it-’til-you-make-it strategy. It has not worked. Michael is exhausted from the effort he’s put into looking like he’s okay. The smile has become a grimace, and he doesn’t have the energy to make it look more realistic. Cameras capture upturned lips and that’s enough to convince them he’s happy, which is the important thing. 

He doesn’t intend to watch those videos when they’re edited together. He can’t even bear to look in the mirror these days. The travesty of him that stares back out with dead eyes only makes him feel worse. At this point he’d doubted whether or not he could actually feel worse.

Standing in front of almost thirty thousand people, it turns out he can. Or at the very least he can feel equally bad in a different way. He’d been drowning before, but he’s choking now. Dying either way. 

If he died onstage, slain where he stood, what would his band do? What would the thousands of fans do? Maybe it would be a mercy. Michael’s a liability right now. He’s frozen in front of thousands of people at the fucking O2 Arena, for fuck’s sake. The band is supposed to be skyrocketing and Michael is a faulty engine, fuel that’s caught fire. If they keep him around they’ll catch fire too, and then they’ll all be free-falling, instead of just him. 

They’d hate him if he died onstage, though. Michael would hate himself too. At the O2, of all places, really? How much more of an attention whore can you be? Couldn’t have waited for a smaller venue to have a heart attack? Or maybe a hotel room? Someplace you could be alone?

Shit. Fuck. The loud cheering has wavered, and all three of his bandmates are giving him concerned looks. Michael fights for breath and finally — for better or for worse — manages to take in the oxygen he’d been missing. And then he forces yet another smile, for his bandmates — but he can’t look at them, can’t see the looks on their faces, not right now — and for the stadium. The sound of screaming doubles in intensity. Michael is already so tired, and they’ve only just started the show.

Luke yells something lead-singer-y and Michael’s hand shakes against the strings of his guitar until he starts playing, closing his eyes for a moment so muscle memory can take over. 

It’s too loud. One way or another, he’ll drown; his lungs aren’t working the way lungs are supposed to, and if they’re not filling with air they might as well fill with water.

Holy shit, he thinks, because he knows enough to know that these are Dangerous Thoughts. But he can’t deal with that right now because they have a show, and after the show he’s fully booked with Pretending He’s Fine from now until forever.

On the opposite side of the stage, Calum catches his eye, and Michael tries to infuse his hollow smile with warmth, sincerity, anything to make that worried expression melt away, but he’s not stupid enough to think it’s worked, even when Calum turns away. Although Calum does turn away, so maybe it means he knows Michael’s lying and just doesn’t care.

You’re in the middle of a show, you fucking idiot, says Michael’s evil subconscious. They’re not going to stop the show in the middle just because you look like you’re seconds from death. You always look like that. 

Right. Right. Michael’s done this to himself. Calum’s not crippled with concern, and he shouldn’t be; he’s Michael’s best friend, not his fucking therapist. Not that Michael has a therapist. Nor does he want one. No random stranger would give a fuck about his bullshit problems, and neither would a random stranger with a PhD.

Fuck. The crowd is getting louder. Is it possible for them to get louder? Or is that all in Michael’s head? Or is everything all in Michael’s head? Are the in-ears keeping the fans’ screams out, or Michael’s screams in? Fuck. Shit. Oxygen is being awfully unreliable today. It’s so loud. Michael closes his eyes again. He knows this song. He’s played this stupid fucking song a thousand times. He could play it in his sleep. He could play it in his casket. That might be what he’s doing right now.

Fuck.

-

Michael is in a constant game with himself, pushing his own limits just to see where he’ll snap. The way he sees it, it’s like exercising a muscle; wherever he breaks, he grows back stronger so he won’t break there again. At this point his threshold is high enough that when he’s feeling particularly masochistic — although when isn’t he — he really has to work for the breakdown. 

It’s a blessing and a curse to be able to handle this much. It means that even when everything is wrong, Michael doesn’t collapse. Which means that he can still play an entire concert at the O2 Arena without having a meltdown, but also that by the time he actually does break, his insides are charred from all the damage control that hasn’t quite succeeded in containing it. 

At least a hotel room is a better place for it than an arena stage.

He can feel it creeping up on him, and he knows it’ll be soon. It won’t take much. There’s already enough wrong as it is. The hotel room is too cold. It’d been nice for a little bit, immediately after the show when he’d been sweaty from the performance, but now it’s making him shiver.

He has sweatshirts, hoodies, blankets. But that would be cheating. Michael stays where he is, sitting at the chair by the window in the tank top he’d played in, staring outside at the sprawling mass of London with all its flickering lights. Sitting by the window is also definitely not helping the temperature situation, but Michael isn’t shying from the crash; he’s trying to induce it. 

Just then, Calum comes out of the bathroom, still towel-drying his hair, and Michael knows what’s next.

Sure enough: “Hey,” the same way one might talk to a baby animal, like if Calum talks too loud he’ll startle it. “You okay?”

Guess, Michael thinks, swallowing. Take a guess. What do you think? “Fine,” he says, because that’s his line. Calum won’t believe it, as well he shouldn’t, since Michael is lying.

“You don’t seem fine,” says Calum. His voice moves around behind Michael as he gets dressed in joggers and a hoodie. “I saw you when we went on to play tonight. You looked like you’d seen a ghost.” There’s a pause. “Like you were a ghost.”

Michael swallows again, and it’s more difficult this time. His eyes sting; his fingers twist anxiously around the hem of his shirt. “That’s a bit dramatic.”

“Well, you didn’t see yourself,” Calum says. 

“Was probably the lights.”

“Don’t be like that, Michael. It’s not like I think you’re okay. I know you’re pretending for the rest of the world, but you don’t have to pretend for me.”

Fuck.

This conversation is not going to be your breaking point, Michael thinks fiercely to himself. Calm down. He inhales raggedly, although it does nothing for his composure. He’s breathing around thorns only by telling himself that they’re roses, and all the while they shred the walls of his lungs, making it more difficult to cling to oxygen when he takes it in.

I’m not pretending, he wants to tell Calum, but he can’t. “Well, you don’t have to worry about me,” he returns. Fuck. His voice sounds shaky and the lights of London are swimming in his vision.

“I don’t worry because I have to,” Calum says. His voice is closer, but before Michael can figure out what he’s doing, he’s taken the seat across from Michael at the window, dropping a flannel into Michael’s lap. “I worry because I love you. You’re shivering.”

Is he? Michael hadn’t noticed. He looks down but he can’t see anything, but if he blinks then the tears will fall and Calum will notice and Michael will have to admit that maybe this is his breaking point and he doesn’t want it to be but he is cold and when he blinks even his eyes feel cold and he quickly looks back at the window and moves his hands on top of the flannel and Calum says, “At least put it on, it’s cold enough in here without wearing a tank top,” and Michael’s throat closes up because however much he can control himself around cameras and crew members and friends and fans, something about Calum makes him completely unravel.

Maybe it’s not that this is his breaking point. Maybe it’s just that this is a safe place to break.

(Maybe it’s a little bit of both.)

So he picks up the flannel and pulls it around his shoulders without putting his arms through the sleeves, and he sniffles and says, “Thanks,” voice all fucked up and wobbly.

“Yeah,” Calum says softly. “What’s on your mind?”

“I’m tired,” Michael whines, and that’s the last he manages before he’s crying like a little kid, tears streaming — it’s been so long since Michael’s cried and he’d forgotten that tears were this relentless, fresh new ones falling now matter how many times Michael tries to squeeze them away — and Calum moves like he’d just been waiting and pulls Michael into a hug, where Michael hides his face and tries to hold his breath because he’s going to die eventually and it will probably happen soon and Michael would at least like to die in Calum’s arms, while he has the chance. But the sobs wracking his body force him to inhale so that plan falls through almost immediately. Because Michael can’t even die right. Fuck.

“Oh, babe,” Calum murmurs. His arms are tight around Michael. “I’m sorry, love, honestly, I’m so sorry.”

Michael can’t stop crying or else he’d say why are you sorry? even though he knows this is more of a sympathetic platitude than anything. Calum does sound sorry but surely he knows it’s not his fault — that this is Michael, all Michael, Michael’s fucked up brain and fucked up self and total inability to get his shit together like everyone else. The more successful the band gets, the worse he feels, and he knows that’s not what’s supposed to happen and he feels even shittier that he’s not being fucking grateful for everything the band is giving him and all the opportunities he has thanks to this, and instead is so stuck in his own fucking head that he’s tallying the passing days like an apocalypse survivor, counting each one he lives through. Or possibly counting down until his death. 

The wrenching sobs slow to nothing. Calum doesn’t try to get Michael to talk, and that itself gets Michael to talk. The silence is worse, and Calum is here, and Calum is safe, and Calum loves Michael. 

“I am not okay,” he mumbles into Calum’s shoulder, which should be a given at this stage, but Calum only squeezes him a little tighter and doesn’t interrupt. “I know that’s a shock.” Calum hums. “I can’t explain why. I don’t know. I just know that this…isn’t how okay people feel.”

“Yeah,” Calum says quietly.

“I don’t know what to do,” Michael says helplessly. “I don’t — I don’t know. But I keep — like — the things I think, you don’t even…you don’t want to know. If you’re worried now, you definitely don’t want to know.”

“I am worried,” Calum says. “But you can tell me if it’ll make you feel better.”

“I don’t want to. It’s not your job to be my therapist.”

“I’m not trying to be your therapist, I’m trying to be your friend.”

“It won’t make me feel better. I’m not going to tell you,” Michael says, though that just means Calum will draw his own conclusions, which might be worse. Not that anything is worse than Michael’s actual thoughts. He adjusts his grip on Calum, tightening his hold. The flannel is falling from around his shoulders, but he doesn’t want to move to pull it up.

“That’s okay.”

“I hate this,” Michael whimpers. It hits him like a hurricane how true that is. “I don’t like this. I don’t want to not be okay. It’s not worth the effort.”

“I know,” Calum says, rubbing circles on Michael’s back.

None of them are okay, truthfully. That’s why Michael can cry on Calum’s shoulder; he knows Calum would cry on his. It’s possible he’s a little worse than the rest of them, but he’s not alone. There’s a twisted comfort in knowing that he doesn’t really have to explain himself to Calum.

“I’m sorry,” he says mournfully.

“Don’t be sorry, you’ve got no reason to be sorry.”

Michael nods, though he’s still sorry. But they won’t get anywhere if Michael’s always apologising. It’ll only serve to annoy Calum, and right now Calum is all Michael has. If the world got any bigger it would crush him, so he keeps it close; it’s only him and Calum and the chill emanating off the window and the flannel dragging against Michael’s back.

Later, when the world expands again, when Michael can bear it, when he’s expelled all the water out of his lungs and stuck plasters over the cracks in his facade to hold himself together, Calum will sit with him on the bed with his laptop open before them and type up a search for virtual therapy despite Michael’s half-hearted protests. Later, Michael will sort himself out a little, Calum by his side to pull him over gaps when Michael’s too much of a coward to step across. Later, much later, a Michael of the future will write about the Michael of the present like he’s a distant memory, using past-tense verbs to make the most tragic sentences into a success story. That Michael is okay, or at least more okay. 

“I know it doesn’t seem like it, but I really think you’re going to be okay,” Calum whispers into his ear now, pressing a lingering kiss to the curve of his jaw. 

Which doesn’t make anything better in the long run, but certainly doesn’t hurt to hear right now. 

“Thank you,” this Michael sighs, as Calum tugs the flannel back up over Michael’s shoulders. 

“Of course,” Calum says lightly. “I love you.”

“Love you too.”

Present Michael can’t see past this moment, but as he takes his first deep breath in days, inhaling the familiar scent of Calum and warm from Calum’s embrace, he thinks that if the future were to hold more moments like this one, it might just be worth living through.

[katieykat513]

That’s The Way It Is

I made this for the wonderful, hard working @ao3bronte

This was only supposed to be a drabble; the work count determined that that was a lie.... 

Here’s the Ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24188539

____________

Ladybug didn't think too hard about the night she showed up to patrol, Chat Noir dancing and singing to Celine Dion. She landed on the roof as her partner danced back and forth, serenading the night in beautiful English, Where Does My Heart Beat Now.

“Where does my heart beat now?/ I can't live without/ Without feeling it inside/ Where do all the lonely hearts go?”

One thing was for certain, his voice was beautiful. “Putting on a concert for me, Chaton?”

He nearly fell off the roof in surprise. “My Lady!” He squeaked, switching back to French, his face burning red. “How long have you been standing there?!” 

She smiled, amused at his high pitched voice. “Oh, long enough to see how well you can move your hips, Kitty Cat.” She winked at him, his face turned redder than it was before. 

“Uhh, can we just forget you saw that?” An uneasy grin settled onto his face. 

“Well, it’s nothing to be ashamed of, Celine Dion is a wonderful singer.” She crossed her arms and gave him a sideways glance as he rubbed the back of his neck in his familiar, nervous habit.

“Yeah, well, just don’t tell the Ladyblogger, ok? Can’t have it out that this suave cat is a big ole wuss puss.” He flexed his biceps to exaggerate his point.

“Wuss puss, huh? I think you do that perfectly fine without that particular knowledge getting out.” She giggled as his face and arms fell.

He reared back up, placed one hand over his heart and the other over his eyes, “My Lady, you wound me so!”

After her giggling died down, they started patrol, Chat’s singing nearly forgotten. It wasn’t her fault that she turned on a Celine Dion album when she returned home that night.

____________________________________________

It wasn’t until a few days later, when Chat had solo patrol, that Marinette was once again reminded that her partner was a die hard Celine fan.

Marinette lounged on her balcony, her sketchbook lay on her lap, as she looked out over the Seine. It was a lovely night to sit outside and sketch the outfit that she had been thinking about all week. Maybe this outfit would get Adrien to become a stuttering mess for once; probably not though. 

She opened her sketchbook and started to sketch a few basic lines when she heard it. A beautiful voice, singing in English.

“Love can touch us one time/ And last for a lifetime/ And never let go 'til we're gone”

The voice came from the other side of the roof and sounded like it moved past her quickly. She rushed to the balcony railing and looked around in the darkness to figure out where the voice  had gone. Finally she noticed the silhouette of her partner two rooftops over, leaping and singing My Heart Will Go On. 

He disappeared over the next building and Marinette shook her head as she headed back to her chair to finish her outfit. “Damn cat,” she muttered to herself.

She sat back down, put her pencil to the paper and froze. Her outfit would not come. All she could think of was Chat Noir singing that damn song. In her mind, all she could see was Chat Noir on top of the Eiffel Tower, arms spread wide, as the wind whipped his hair around his faux ears, yelling to all of Paris, ‘I’m the king of the world!’

“Uhhggg! Dumb, stupid, lovable, furball!” She grumbled as she turned to a different section of her book that contained doodles. Her pencil met the paper and the drawing came to life.

_________________________________

The next day at school, Marinette sat on the benches between the lockers, smiling at her drawing from the night before. So lost in thought that she didn’t register the humming of Because you loved me, nor did she see the shadow as it came up behind her.

“What you got there, Marinette?”

“Gahh!” She screamed as Adrien snuck up behind her. Her sketchbook flew through the air landing face up, the sketch exposed for all to see. 

Adrien’s face went pale. “Wh..what is this?” He picked up the book and spun it around to look at the drawing. 

“Uhh.. just a doodle. Came to me randomly last night.” She stuttered out as she reached for the book, but he took a step back and hugged the book close. She bit her lip and thought something was wrong with it and almost missed what he said next.

“Can I have a copy?” He breathed out. 

“I’m. Sorry?” She said, completely confused. Why would Adrien want a picture of Chat Noir in a Titanic pose? And why did he look so pale and red at the same time?

“Uh. Oh. Um. You see. I’m a huge Titanic fan. And a huge superhero fan.” He stuttered out, not making eye contact,  his face became increasingly red as he went along. He stopped and had a look of dawning on his face, “Actually, can I make a request?”

“Uhh. I guess so?”

“Can you make me this sketch, but can you do it from later on in the movie, when it’s Jack and Rose. But can you make it Ladybug and Chat Noir and on the Titanic? Please? I’ll pay for it! How much do you want?” 

After breaking out of her shock, Marinette couldn’t help but lovingly smile at him as he became more excited as he spoke. A plan was already forming in her mind as pieces of a puzzle she didn't know she had, started to form in her head.

“Adrien.”

“Yes?”

“You don’t have to pay me.”

“But I can!!”

“But you won’t! Don’t worry Adrien, I’ll do it for you, because you are my friend. And I love giving gifts to my friends.” She stuck her hand out and he placed the sketchbook in her open palm.

“Thank you so much, Marinette! This means a lot to me! You have no idea!”

“Oh, I think I have an idea,” she said quietly.

“What was that?”

“Oh! I said, I have an idea...for the picture..yeah! It’s going to be great, you’ll love it! Ok. Gotta go! See you, Adrien!” 

She gathered her belongings and left the locker room, not stopping until she reached her room. She flopped down on her chaise, grabbed the pillow, and proceeded to scream into it. Tikki flew out of her purse and landed on Marinette’s head. 

“Marinette, are you ok? It’s just a drawing.”

Marinette lifted her head up and sighed dreamily, “It’s so much more than that.”

Confused, Tikki flew off to the bed while Marinette threw herself at her desk and began to furiously draw.

__________________________

A few days later the drawing was ready and she had a wonderful way to give it to him. Right before sunset she transformed, grabbed a blanket with supplies and hopped over to the roof next to hers. The same roof where Chat Noir had told her that he was glad to have her as a friend and she told him she was in love with another boy. 

Oh the irony, she thought.

She set up a blanket, placed two pillows at each end, and put a box of assorted pastries, mostly passionfruit, in between them. She placed a few fake candles around the blanket and a small bluetooth speaker next to one of the pillows, but mostly out of sight from someone not looking for it. Satisfied, she looked at the time; two hours till showtime. 

She hopped back over to her balcony and went down into her room. She grabbed her phone and a present off her desk, wrapped in black paper with a green ribbon, and hugged it close to her. She really hoped he liked it. She went back outside and hopped back over to the roof, except this time she hid on the other side of a chimney and waited for him to arrive. 

Once she heard the tell-tale metallic sound of his staff twirling through the air, she looked at her cell phone and opened the music app. She had the song queued up, all she had to do was push play as soon as he landed. 

She peaked around the corner of the chimney and the look of awe on Chat Noir’s face had her grinning ear to ear. She looked back down to her phone and pressed play. Power of Love started to play through the speaker causing Chat to jump into the air in surprise. 

As the song headed toward the second chorus Ladybug got ready to make her appearance; she was going to knock his socks off. He kept looking around for her, and the moment he had his back turned from her couldn’t have worked out more perfectly, as she walked from behind the chimney, present in hand, as she sang in accented english.

“'Cause I'm your lady/ And you are my man/ Whenever you reach for me/ I'll do all that I can/ We're heading for something/ Somewhere I've never been/ Sometimes I am frightened/ But I'm ready to learn/ Of the power of love.”

“La..Ladybug?!” His voice was tight. He was on the verge of tears, wondering if this was real, a sentimonster, or a dream. His hand twitched to grab his staff and run away from the situation. She paused the music and tossed her phone on the pillow.

“Hello, Chaton. I know what you’re thinking. Yes, this is real. No, I am not a sentimonster. And I know that’s what a sentimonster would say, but hear me out! When we fought Copycat, all those months ago, you remember what made me realize which one was real?”

He nodded his head.

“You looked up at me from the ground, winked, and said ‘Would I ever lie to you, Buginette?’ remember?”

“Oh My Lady!” He ran to scoop her up in his arms. “I was so scared! Never do that to this poor cat's heart again!”

“Sorry. Guess I was just a little excited.”

“What is all of this? Why now? And I didn’t know you liked Celine Dion too!!”

“All will be answered in time. For now, open it.” She handed him the present he had almost squashed between them when he hugged her.

“A present? For me? But it’s not even my birthday.”

“I know.” He looked up at her, confused, “Just open it!” 

She watched as he opened the present to reveal a small notebook that had pages that could be added or removed. He looked at it questioningly as she started speaking again.

“You see, I may enjoy Celine Dion, but not enough to commission a friend to draw a picture of his superhero alter ego, standing on the bow of the titanic with his superhero partner.” She looked at him as he lost all color in his face. 

He looked down at the book and opened it. There on the first page, was the original doodle of Chat Noir on the Eiffel Tower, encased in a plastic page sleeve. He turned the page and gasped. It was almost the same picture, but instead of just Chat Noir, Ladybug was standing right behind him, standing on the second rung of the railing, to make her seem taller, her arms wrapped around his torso, as she sat her head on his shoulder. 

“How did you..”

“Keep going, there's one more.” She interrupted.

He looked back down, tears glistened in his eyes, and turned the page. There, in beautiful color was a picture of two people standing on the bow of the titanic; except it wasn’t Ladybug and Chat Noir. Standing in the front was Marinette with her arms spread wide with Adrien behind her, his arms around her waist as she leaned into his chest. Picture Adrien leaned in to give picture Marinette a kiss on her cheek as her face was flushed. Both of them were wearing the original clothes that Jack and Rose wore.

“Mar...Marinette?” He looked up as tears of joy flowed down his face, to see Ladybug smiling wide at him. 

“Hello, Adrien. I’d drop my transformation but I didn’t exactly tell Tikki about all this, so I’d rather not have to hear a lecture quite yet.”

He gaped at her and rushed to gather her in his arms again. 

“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! This is the best present anyone has ever given me! Thank you so much, My Lady! Oh! I call you Buginette!! It’s so close to your actual name! No wonder you hate it! But seriously, Celine Dion! I loved it! You have an amazing voice, My Lady! And your art? Wonderful! When we get married I’m hanging this in our living room for all to see!”

Ladybug laughed at the overexcited boy in a cat suit. “Well, Adrien has to ask Marinette on a date before she agrees to marry him. But I have it on good authority that she’ll say yes.” 

“Nope, we are skipping all the steps! We are going to go find someone to marry us right now! Show up to school tomorrow as newlyweds, and watch everyone freak out!”

“Ok. Ok. Calm down, Cat-sanova, we’ll get there. But first, I think you promised payment for a drawing. And as you can see I have provided you with three.” She puckered her lips out a little and batted her eyelashes. 

“Payment? But you said they were a gift! I would have brought my wallet! If I had known!”

Ladybug gave him a deadpanned look as he started to freak out again, “Adrien.”

“Yes?”

“Just kiss me, Chaton.”

“Ohhhhhh. That kind of payment! Yeah. I can do th..”

She didn’t give him a chance to finish, for fear that he wouldn't stop, grabbed him by the bell and yanked him down to her lips, as she threw her other arm to latch around his neck. His arms came around her waist, as they held each other tight.

Celine Dion would definitely be a part of their wedding playlist.